#children of zaf

[zafirosreverie]

How about shared custody?

We already talked about this, I can't share custody of a child with another child!! You're all my children!!

[yutopia-eleftheria]

Byron Love Next Generation

Byron and Henry were always in love, but they never confess it. However, Changsu Choi wanted to have Byron for him, to a point where he hurt hims (and even cut his hair) and tries to stop Henry too. He even conceive a child with him (considering the story I guess you can understand what really happens without me having to tell you the word...). After the encounter, Henry is now stuck in a wheelchair, but now Byron and Henry are together forever.

Note that Byron also adopted Bay Laurel, which means he is their children’s adopted brother.

Byron is also related to Neith Venus, as the latter is the result of and ADN mix between Byron and Edgar’s.

“Byron Love X Changsu Choi” :

Min-Ho Love :

Full name : Min-Ho Atréus Love

Nickname : Min

Gender : Born Male, Genderfluid

Birthday : September 20th

Zodiac Sign : Virgo

Height : 5′2″ (156 cm)

Weight : 110 lbs (50 kg)

Nationality : Japanese / Korean / Russian

Parents : Byron Love and Changsu Choi

Siblings : Zafiro Love House {half-sister}

                          Célesta Love {half-sister}

                          Randall Love {half-brother}

                          Bay Laurel {adopted brother}

                          Neith Venus {”Brother”}

Other family : Sirius Love {grandfather} / Venera Love {grandmother} / Veronica Love {aunt}  / Anteros House {great cousin} / Harmonia Love {great cousin} / Sybille Love {great-aunt} / Alan Love {great-uncle} / Éric Purpleton {step-uncle}

Personality : Curious, Outgoing and Playful

Position : Midfielder

Teams : Zeus (7) / Fire Dragons (8) {Captain}

Element : Air

Min-Ho is the illegitimate child of Byron Love and Changsu Choi. Byron categorically refused his child to spend some time with his father because of what Changsu Choi did to him. He knows what happened with their parents, but he acts as if he doesn’t know anything. They live happily with his siblings and parents, considering Henry House as their own dad.

Byron Love X Henry House :

Zafiro Love House :

Full name : Zafiro Ronna Love House

Nickname : Zaf / Zafi

Gender : Female

Birthday : March 29th

Zodiac Sign : Aries

Height : 5′9″ (175 cm)

Weight : 139 lbs (63 kg)

Nationality : Japanese / Korean / Russian

Parents : Byron Love and Henry House

Siblings : Min-Ho Love {half-brother}

                          Célesta Love {younger sister}

                          Randall Love {younger brother}

                          Bay Laurel {adopted brother}

                          Neith Venus {”brother”}

Other family : Sirius Love {grandfather} / Venera Love {grandmother} / Veronica Love {aunt}  / Anteros House {great cousin} / Harmonia Love {great cousin}  / Sybille Love {great-aunt} / Alan Love {great-uncle} / Éric Purpleton {step-uncle}

Personality : Trickster, Hardworking and Kind

Position : Forward

Teams : Zeus (9) / Epsilon (7) / Fire Dragon (9)

Element : Earth

Notable Hissatsu Techniques Inherited from Parents : Heaven’s Time

Zafiro is the oldest daughter and child of Byron Love and Henry House, despite her sister Célesta looking older than her. She is often seen wearing bandages on her eyes, or in one of her eyes, to enhance her senses in a unique way, but also to understand how blind people “see” the World, like Bonnie Sparks from Prominence, whom she deeply admires. She also likes to play with Ronnie Metcalf despite him being older and more experienced than her.

Célesta Love :

Full name : Célesta Harmonia Love

Nickname : Céleste

Gender : Female

Birthday : January 2nd

Zodiac Sign : Capricorn

Height : 6′4″ (189 cm)

Weight : 152 lbs (69 kg)

Nationality : Japanese / Korean / Russian

Parents : Byron Love and Henry House

Siblings : Min-Ho Love {half-brother}

                          Zafiro Love House {older sister}

                          Randall Love {younger brother}

                          Bay Laurel {adopted brother}

                          Neith Venus {”brother”}

Other family : Sirius Love {grandfather} / Venera Love {grandmother} / Veronica Love {aunt}  / Anteros House {great cousin} / Harmonia Love {great cousin}  / Sybille Love {great-aunt} / Alan Love {great-uncle} / Éric Purpleton {step-uncle}

Personality : Headstrong, Loyal and Honest

Position : Forward

Teams : Zeus (10) {Captain} / Fire Dragons (10)

Element : Fire

Notable Hissatsu Techniques Inherited from Parents : God Knows / God Break / Chaos Break

Célesta is the daughter of Byron Love and Henry House. She is incredibly tall and she looks way older than her older siblings Min-Ho and Zafiro. She has dark-colored eyes and slight vitiligo. Her power is beyond imagination and she is said to be one of the strongest female football players of all time to a point where everyone is afraid of facing her.

Randall Love :

Full name : Randall Lawrence Love

Nickname : Randy

Gender : Born Male, Demiboy

Birthday : October 1st

Zodiac Sign : Libra

Height : 5′4″ (162 cm)

Weight : 132 lbs (60 kg)

Nationality : Japanese / Korean / Russian

Parents : Byron Love and Henry House

Siblings : Min-Ho Love {half-brother}

                          Zafiro Love House {older sister}

                          Célesta Love {older sister}

                          Bay Laurel {adopted brother}

                          Neith Venus {”brother”}

Other family : Sirius Love {grandfather} / Venera Love {grandmother} / Veronica Love {aunt} / Anteros House {great cousin} / Harmonia Love {great cousin}  / Sybille Love {great-aunt} / Alan Love {great-uncle} / Éric Purpleton {step-uncle”}

Personality : Quiet, Attentive and Eavesdropping

Position : Midfielder

Teams : Zeus (15) / Fire Dragons (14)

Element : Wood

Randall is the youngest and only son of Byron Love and Henry House. Unlike his siblings, he is way more quiet and often hides. He still wants to know more but he doesn’t show it so often. He feels safe when his sisters are with him.

[luisa323]

Im not fluent in Spanish yet, but I am taking Spanish class so I’m sorry if the few words I wrote in Spanish weren’t correct.

You can not tell me Julieta doesn't have 10 kids to take care of.

Her first children are Isabella, Luisa and Mirabel, then Dolores, Camilo, and Antonio, then Pepa, Felix, Bruno, and we can't forget the most childish, her wife y/n.

Throughout the days they will all go to her and ask her for help or if she needs help they will help, everyone also makes sure she is taking breaks because after the whole candle incident she has been working harder and more non-stop. Y/n is almost always by her wife's side, if she's not there she is either getting Juli more pre-made food or the restroom other than that they are connected at the hip.

One day though Pepa goes to Julieta and the sky was dark and cloudy so Juli knew her little sister was upset.

"Juli can I sleep in your room tonight? I-I just-"

But before she could finish Julieta pulled her into a hug.

"Yes you can always come and sleep in my room no matter the reason hermana"

At this Pepa started crying, which means it started raining, but that didn't bother Julieta she kept hugging her hermana even though she was getting soaked by Pepa's tears and the rain. If you wanted to you could think of the rain as Pepa's tears since she controls the weather.

~later that day after lunch~

Juli is at her stand taking a break because y/n literally forced her to sit down and she is now sitting on to of Juli so she can't get up and start working until her break is over, and with y/n being taller than Julieta it was easy to pick her up and make her sit down for a break. About 10 minutes into her break Antonio walks up to them and y/n moves off Julieta so she can talk to Antonio.

"Hey Tonio, is everything okay?"

"Mhm, just wanted Mama Juli huggies"

"Okay, I'll give you some huggies right now but I do have to go back to work soon so you can come and sleep in my room with y/n and Pepa alright?"

"Okie, is it okay if I stay here the rest of the time though?"

"Not at all sweetie you can play with y/n while I work okay?"

"Okie!"

Antonio turns to y/n as Julieta gets back to work at her stand.

"Hi auntie y/n!"

"Hi buddy, what do you want to play hm? Maybe eye spy?"

With that y/n and Antonio start playing together until Julieta is done with her shift at her stand.

~Time skip to bed time~

Juli gets dressed in her normal nightgown and sits down in bed while y/n is changing into her unicorn onesie with a hood that has a horn and face along with a tail. When y/n is done changing she heads for bed but then sees everyone piled on the bed and squished together.

"Um... What? I mean I don't care as long as I get my pillow"

And with that y/n gets on top of Julieta and starts using her as a pillow like always.

"Guys...I..Can't breath"

No one moves

"GUYS MY GIRLFRIEND CAN'T BREATH SO MOVE YOUR CULOS AND GET OFF"

Everyone was shocked because y/n doesn't ever yell so once everyone got off the bed including Julieta and y/n they chose who would sleep where and y/n got told why everyone was in there. Felix was in there because he didn't want to sleep alone and didn't want to sleep in a different room as Pepa. Dolores, Isabella, Camilo, Mirabel, and Bruno just wanted to join the party.

"Okay y/n, Pepa and Antonio will sleep on the bed with me, everyone else suck it up and sleep somewhere in my room, just don't mess with anything you don't need to sleep."

Pepa, Juli and Antonio get on the bed then y/n climbs on last and rests on Juli as her pillow once again.

"Mi amor you can get off now, you don't have to sleep with your head in my chest."

"I know but your my pillow and if i get off someone else will use my pillow"

"Mi amor I am your wife"

"Same thing"

A/N: I'm not dead, I just didn't have my chromebook over the summer because it's my school, I have motivation and prompts now so hopefully I'm able to post more. I hope you liked this. I came up with this with Zaf while I was cleaning my room yesterday and a few other things that will be their own but smaller and shorter because they are just naturally short unless I get off track and manage to add random stuff in, like I did here. Anyway hope you have a good day/night or afternoon and you drink and eat even if it's just a bit.

Lots of love,

El ❤️

[blue-kyber]

It's after midnight yet again, and here's the edited chapter 9. :)

"Out There: The 1K"

Chapter 9: Mountain Base

Yune takes a chance on Zaf's 75% accurate lead as to where Senator Runell is hiding. The search takes him to the snowy Mosskiri mountains on Masaka later that same day where he comes across a hidden facility built into a loft valley and the mountains it's stretched between. Instead of finding his bounty, he spots two children - Will and Terra - playing with a blue sphere of light beneath a clear dome in the center of the valley. It seems like a game until the two kids are shot with a bind blast and whisked out of sight. Yune's instinct that something isn't right kicks in. He had no idea who they are, but he vows to collect his bounty, and figure out why those kids are being held captive.

Tag list: @muddshadow @cedar-west @athenixrose @penspiration-writing @runningoutofbooks @tobiornottobithatisthequestion @roll-top-writing @subject-2-change @dreaming-in-seams @mismatchingart @midnight-and-his-melodiverse @thewriteflame @writingventriloquist @ren-c-leyn @asher-orion-writes @aninkwellofnectar @winterandwords @raevenlywrites @nanashi23 @athenaannarose @the-tired-writer @space-cadead@cljordan-imperium @wildswrites @dogmomwrites

[hadaad]

░ BASICS .

NAME. ░ Zafar David Younis NICKNAME / ALIAS. ░ Zaf AGE. ░ 28 CURRENT RESIDENCE. ░ London, England SPECIES. ░ Human GENDER. ░ Male PRONOUNS. ░ He/Him ORIENTATION. ░ Demisexual ETHNICITY. ░ Asian PROFESSION. ░ junior case officer for mi5 / former junior officer/researchist for mi6's north african desk EDUCATION. ░ graduated from manchester university with a BA in geography and a masters in international relations. ALIGNMENT. ░ Lawful Good ZODIAC SIGN. ░ aquarius  SPOKEN LANGUAGES. ░ Fluent in English and Urdu. PARENTS. ░ Mahmed and Sarah (nee wilson) Younis SIBLINGS. ░ The middle child out of seven, he has 4 sisters and 2 brothers. His sisters are Fatima (age 32), Clare (age 25), Lucy (age 22), and Layla (age 19). His brothers are Robert (age 35) and Yasser (age 30).  SIGNIFICANT OTHER. ░ Adam Carter. CHILDREN. ░ Of his own? None. But he is a fantastic uncle zaf when it comes to Wes. PETS. ░  none but he has a huge soft spot for dogs.

░ PHYSICAL .

FACE CLAIM. ░ Raza Jaffrey HAIR COLOR. ░ Black EYE COLOR. ░ Dark brown HEIGHT. ░ 6′0″ MEDICAL CONDITIONS. ░ None.

░ PERSONALITY / OTHER .

HOBBIES. ░ Cars (especially the fast ones), tabletop games, graphic design/photoshop, photography    POSITIVE TRAITS. ░ Clever, loyal, compassionate, optimistic, funny, charismatic, selfless NEGATIVE TRAITS. ░ stubborn, brash, too trusting, cocky, occasionally prickly, thinks cats are awful LIKES. ░   Adam. video games. horror movies. pizza. his car. work DISLIKES. ░ bullies. being stereotyped. people who are close minded. ants. toes. not being taken seriously. religious idealism FEARS. ░  dying alone, dark enclosed spaces, weaponized ignorance. FAVORITE MOVIE. ░ Prometheus  FAVORITE TV SHOW. ░ Top Gear SMELLS LIKE. ░ sea air and sandalwood. he has a vaguely lemonesque smell WHAT’S IN THEIR BAG. ░ its a rucksack. theres a gun, a knife, cords for technology .. anything he might need on the job. WHAT DO THEY DO TO UNWIND. ░ play videogames.

░ DETAILED BIOGRAPHY .

Zaf was born in Croyden on February 2nd to Mahmed and Sarah Younis.

tbc bc i'm so fucking lazy lmao

[writingfanficsfan]

Book 86 of 2022

Danika Brown knows what she wants: professional success, academic renown, and an occasional roll in the hay to relieve all that career-driven tension. But romance? Been there, done that, burned the T-shirt. Romantic partners, whatever their gender, are a distraction at best and a drain at worst. So Dani asks the universe for the perfect friend-with-benefits—someone who knows the score and knows their way around the bedroom. When brooding security guard Zafir Ansari rescues Dani from a workplace fire drill gone wrong, it’s an obvious sign: PhD student Dani and ex-rugby player Zaf are destined to sleep together. But before she can explain that fact, a video of the heroic rescue goes viral. Now half the internet is shipping #DrRugbae—and Zaf is begging Dani to play along. Turns out, his sports charity for kids could really use the publicity. Lying to help children? Who on earth would refuse? Dani’s plan is simple: fake a relationship in public, seduce Zaf behind the scenes. The trouble is, grumpy Zaf’s secretly a hopeless romantic—and he’s determined to corrupt Dani’s stone-cold realism. Before long, he’s tackling her fears into the dirt. But the former sports star has issues of his own, and the walls around his heart are as thick as his... um, thighs. Suddenly, the easy lay Dani dreamed of is more complex than her thesis. Has her wish backfired? Is her focus being tested? Or is the universe just waiting for her to take a hint?

I didn’t like this one as much as I liked book 1 of the series. Maybe it’s because I read the Dutch version and the translation for things like cock/dick/pussy/vagina just sound damn aweful and kinda gross. 

I did adore the character of Zaf a lot. I will read the last book in this series but I do hope I like book 3 more then this one. 

[blueysbookshelf]

2022 Book 22: Take A Hint, Dani Brown by Talia Hibbert - ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

(I've decided I'm going to give you the blurbs for these books as well, since my reviews tend to not summarize them, mainly because I'm horrible at not spoiling things 😬)

Danika Brown knows what she wants: professional success, academic renown, and an occasional roll in the hay to relieve all that career-driven tension. But romance? Been there, done that, burned the T-shirt. Romantic partners, whatever their gender, are a distraction at best and a drain at worst. So Dani asks the universe for the perfect friend-with-benefits—someone who knows the score and knows their way around the bedroom. When brooding security guard Zafir Ansari rescues Dani from a workplace fire drill gone wrong, it’s an obvious sign: PhD student Dani and ex-rugby player Zaf are destined to sleep together. But before she can explain that fact, a video of the heroic rescue goes viral. Now half the internet is shipping #DrRugbae—and Zaf is begging Dani to play along. Turns out, his sports charity for kids could really use the publicity. Lying to help children? Who on earth would refuse? Dani’s plan is simple: fake a relationship in public, seduce Zaf behind the scenes. The trouble is, grumpy Zaf’s secretly a hopeless romantic—and he’s determined to corrupt Dani’s stone-cold realism. Before long, he’s tackling her fears into the dirt. But the former sports star has issues of his own, and the walls around his heart are as thick as his... um, thighs. Suddenly, the easy lay Dani dreamed of is more complex than her thesis. Has her wish backfired? Is her focus being tested? Or is the universe just waiting for her to take a hint?

My Review:

"Major or minor, if something keeps you human when pressure makes you feel like a volcano, hold on to that thing by whatever means necessary."

Dani's hero, the person she looks up to, says this to her in a moment of uncertainty for Dani and it absolutely resonated so strongly with me. It applies to people, hobbies, items, anything that grounds you and it was such a necessary reminder for me in that moment. And this is one of the things I love most about reading, finding nuggets that speak to me and resonate for my day to day life.

This book was wonderful and I enjoyed it immensely. Zaf and Dani were incredibly well written and I loved their romance and the way they navigated their issues to end up together. It's a definite reread for me. It really is that simple. It was great. You should read it.

[rahleeyah]

*waves timidly* hello! long time lurker first time asker. Please don't feel like you have to publish this I just wanted to drop by and say how much I have enjoyed your fiction and your blog in general. I have only very recently gotten back into SVU after a loooong time away and its been so lovely to read all the asks you get and your meta and your fic ideas! And your writing! is so! lovely! I really appreciate how hopeful all your stories are. They can deal with dark themes and pain but there's always healing and/or hope and/or a happy ending and after the last couple of years I need that so badly. (nothing wrong with other kinds of fic of course! Its just too Much for me these days). So thank you for having such a lovely fanspace on your blog and thank you for your writing which never fails to make me smile.

ANON!!!! This is the sweetest thing 😭 I'm just. I'm so glad that this blog has been a happy welcoming space for you.

Here's the thing. An expression I like is "everything will be all right in the end. If it's not all right, it's not the end."

Tragedy has its place. A good tragedy is cathartic. Luxurious. But the key to a good tragedy, for me, is it has to mean something. Jack dies, but he gave Rose a taste of freedom and she spread her wings bc of him, and she lives a long, full, happy life. Romeo and Juliet are dead, but their families' feud has finally come to an end. The story doesn't end with the Tragedy. The audience is left with some sense that the world will keep turning. That life carries on. It's why the end of spooks, for example, is so utterly appalling; Ruth dies senselessly, just as she and Harry were on the verge of happiness, and he just. Goes back to work. Tom kills the people ultimately responsible, and Harry is back at his desk. He has lost so much. So many people. And nothing has changed. There's a revolving door of faces, and an endless stream of grief, and the horror never stops, and Harry is trapped there. There is nowhere else for him to go. There is nothing else for him to do. His entire life is an endless string of tragedies, and what has it got him, in the end? His children don't pick up when he calls and Adam and Colin and Ros and Ruth and Zaf and Tariq and Jo and Danny and Fiona and Lucas and Erin and Callum and and and they're all dead. He is, utterly, alone.

(I didn't hate that in the spooks movie he ended up going rogue (I DID HATE THAT ERIN DIED LIKE THAT WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT) bc that is a more fitting end for Harry; walking away. But I digress)

Anyway. The whole point of this ramble is to say that, yes, I will always give you a happy ending. An ending should be, in its own way, a beginning. It should leave us with the sense that the world will keep moving on. That there is another chapter we just haven't read yet. Grief without meaning, ending with pain, feels...cruel, to me. Particularly in fiction, where so many of us turn for escape, for relief, for hope.

Now!! Other people feel differently!! And I will defend their right to write and read and celebrate whatever they want!! But here, my blog, my stories, this is my garden and I choose what flowers I want to plant and I want to grow hope here.

And I'm glad you've found your home here, too 💜

[incorrectspooks]

Adam: All I’m saying is you’re speeding and there are children.

Zaf: Well if kids are out at midnight, they’ve got it coming.

[canonloveinterest]

Hi, I was fucking around in AI D/ungeon in the Ghost-based world/scenarios I had on there from a while back. Don't mind me.

These got angsty at some points and it shouldn't have made me as (crying cat.jpg) as it did. #long post

> You say "Who?"

"Papa Emeritus II," he says.

You scrunch your face up, and roll your eyes. You rest your elbows on the desk across from Miach, and put your chin on your hands.

> You say "I heard he's an asshole."

"He's a great leader," Amadeus says. "And pretty friendly when you get to know him."

> You say "Is he friendly with you?"

"Yes." Amadeus smiles, before nodding.

"Alright," you say. You stand, and nod to Amadeus. He smiles, and reaches out to shake your hand. You shake Amadeus's hand. His grip is too tight and it hurts a little bit.

"Bye, Amadeus," you say.

"Bye," he replies. You walk over to the door, opening it.

You stick your head out, looking up and down the hallways.

> You go to meet with Papa Emeritus II.

You walk along the hallway, trying to remember the way to the Papa Emeritus II's office. Eventually, you reach the large doors leading to it. You reach up, and knock on the door. There is no answer. You knock again.

"Hello?" you say.

You wait, but there is no reply. You shrug, and walk into the office, looking around. You're not seeing anything out of place.

There is no reply.

You sigh, and continue looking around. You spot Papa Emeritus II's coat on a chair by the desk, and smile. The sight of the coat is comforting. You feel a fondness in your chest. You and Papa Emeritus II have had a number of pleasant conversations at this point, but you still don't know him very well. He is intimidating.

> You sit on the couch and wait for Papa Emeritus II to return.

You sit on the couch, and wait patiently. Papa Emeritus II still hasn't returned. You begin to worry.

> You check the papers on his desk.

There is a large amount of papers on the desk, all of which you've read before. They're Papa Emeritus II's way of keeping up with events in the church.

> You text Zaffre the ghoul and ask if they have seen Papa Emeritus II anywhere in the cathedral.

You stand from the couch, and begin to open up your phone. You type out a message to Zaf, quickly tapping out the message.

> You wait for a reply.

A minute passes. Still no reply. Frustrated, you slam your fist on the desk. The papers flutter down, and your hand tightens around the phone. You wait for a reply from him. After an hour, your patience wears thin. You get frustrated and throw the cell phone across the room.

> You leave the office and go to Papa Emeritus II's personal living quarters.

You enter Papa Emeritus II's bedroom, and look around. You spot his coat on the chair he usually sits on, and smile. You walk over to the coat, and pick it up, hanging it in the closet.

> You look at the clothes in his closet.

You walk over to Papa Emeritus II's closet, and run your hand along the back of his suits. You wonder where he is.

> You call Papa Emeritus II's cell phone.

Papa Emeritus II's calm voice comes in on the other line.

"Yes?" He answers.

You pause for a long second.

"Hi," you say.

He doesn't respond.

"I...um...just wanted to see how you are."

"I'm fine, Cirice."

You pause again.

"Are...are you at the office?"

"Yes."

> You say "No you aren't. I was just there."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"I see..." Papa Emeritus II says slowly.

"Are you mad at me?" You ask.

"No."

"Are you sad?"

Papa Emeritus II doesn't answer.

"Well, okay," you say. "Well I was just calling to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine, Cirice."

> You say "Can you come see me? I'm in your room. "

"No."

"Please?"

"Can you come see me?"

Papa Emeritus II continues to remain silent.

"Please?"

> You cry.

Papa Emeritus II laughs.

"I'm hanging up now, Cirice."

You wait for Papa Emeritus II to hang up, but he doesn't.

> You say "Okay. That's fine. I'll be at my apartment when you're ready to talk to me, then. "

"See you later, little one," Papa Emeritus II says.

"Bye Papa."

You hang up the phone, and sit on the bed in Papa Emeritus II's room.

Papa Emeritus II's bedroom is a large, luxurious room. The wall in front of you is covered in photographs taken over the years. Most of the pictures feature Papa Emeritus II with various people. You punch the wall, and some frames shake and tilt crookedly. A few photos flutter off the wall. You do not feel better. Papa Emeritus II's bedroom is dimly lit, but the sun sets behind the office tower, so the room is cast in shadows. You sit slumped on Papa Emeritus II's bed, starring at the wall of photographs.

> You go back to your apartment.

You stand up from Papa Emeritus II's bed, and pick up your coat from the chair in the corner by the door. You slip into your coat, and walk outside. On your way out, you run into Papa Emeritus II coming home. You accidentally make eye contact and desperately try to make it seem like you weren't just crying in Papa Emeritus II's bedroom.

"Cirice, are you okay?" he asks.

"Yes, Papa."

"Do you need something?"

You look down at your feet, avoiding his gaze.

"I was just leaving," you say.

After a brief pause you look back up at Papa Emeritus II and remember what he said on the phone.

"Why were you acting like that?" You ask him.

"Like what?"

"You know, sad."

"I wasn't acting sad. I was just thinking, is all."

"About?" "Things."

> You say "If there's anything wrong, I want you to know you can tell me. Or not, if you don't want to. Whatever."

"There's nothing wrong, Cirice. Go on, now."

You stand awkwardly for a few moments longer, looking him hard in his eyes. You furrow your brow and look at his mismatched green and white eyes.

"I'm sorry you're... occupied, with your thoughts," you say. "But I don't appreciate you being so dismissive. It hurts, you know? And I love you." You say.

Papa Emeritus II looks at you. You can't tell what he's thinking behind the green and white eyes.

"We'll talk later tonight, okay?" he says.

> You say "Right. Call me when you're ready to talk, then. I'm going to my apartment. "

"Very well, Cirice. I love you."

> You take your leave.

On your way out of the office building, you walk quickly through the offices.

> You go home to your apartment.

You go home to your apartment, wondering what Papa Emeritus II's problem is. You go home to your empty apartment and turn on the TV, only to continue thinking about his harsh words on the phone and then your terse meeting in the hallway outside his living quarters. Papa Emeritus II is a single man who has shown no interest in love or romance. He has no wife and has no children of his own. He seems to only pursue people who he finds sexually appealing, but they never remain for long. He only keeps them around long enough to be satisfied in the bedroom, and then they break up. So why has he been showing you this amount of romantic interest? Surely he would have given up or gotten bored after a while, pursuing you, a nervous wreck of an office worker. You've denied him at every attempt to become sexually intimate.

Maybe it's because you remind him of a dead lover or ex-flame.

But you can't know for sure.

The man never opens up, and when he does he's just as quick to shut you out. Maybe you should give up trying to figure him out. Now that he's not interested in you, why bother? Those thoughts make you cry a little more. But if he wasn't interested, why would he kiss you? Why would he say that he loves you as often as he does, when he does that with no one else but you?

> What does it mean?

You've been trying to figure out the hidden meanings in Papa Emeritus II's words and actions ever since he first showed them to you. Papa Emeritus II is mysterious and no one ever knows what his intentions are. Surely, he has no ill will toward you. He said he loved you when you spoke outside his office. He kissed you, even though he was harsh over the phone earlier. You decide to continue waiting for him to either visit your apartment or call you to explain himself.

> You turn off the TV and go to bed.

The next day, you enter your office as usual. All is normal, nothing is wrong. Papa Emeritus II did not speak to you that night. His exact words were "I'll speak to you later".

Perhaps he meant in the morning, at the office. You wait for him, thinking about him the entire time you're at work. He didn't know that you waited up for him. You watch as night after night passes by without any interaction from him.

> You return to his office and knock at the door.

You knock at the door, and after a few moments it opens, with Papa Emeritus II looking down upon you. He's in the same outfit as yesterday, and holds a small box in his hand.

> You look at him suspiciously.

"You're back," he says.

> "Of course I am," you reply.

"I have a gift for you," he says, handing you the box.

You take the chocolates gingerly from his hand. You give him a soft "thank you" before looking back up at him.

> "How are you feeling today?" You ask him.

His eye twitches and his lips press into a thin line.

"You were awfully short with me yesterday, you know. I hope everything is still... okay. Between you and me, I mean." You say.

"Yes, of course," he replies.

He looks down for a moment, and his eye twitches. After a brief pause, you begin to leave. "Wait!"

> You say "Yes?"

Papa Emeritus II hesitates, as if he didn't mean to call out.

"I..." he begins to say, before pausing. "I'll see you later, okay?"

Your hand clenches into a fist, crumpling the box slightly.

"You said that yesterday! And nothing! You didn't even call me back." You say, your voice becoming slightly louder than needed. Tears prickle at the corners of your eyes again.

For a split second, Papa Emeritus II looks absolutely furious at someone raising their voice to him. He is the Unholy Excellency. He is the leader of this church. Nobody raises their voice at Papa Emeritus II.

"Please just tell me what's wrong," you whisper.

The look of hurt and confusion on your face seems to strike a chord in him. He sighs, defeated.

"I'm sorry. I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm overwhelmed. I'm sad. Please, just leave me alone." He says, his voice breaking.

> You say "Alright. If that's what you want. I'm sorry that I disturbed you. "

> You say "Thanks for the candy. "

You turn around and return to your desk in the office. The candy in its crumpled box sits untouched at your desk. You can't think of anything else but the sorrowful expression on Papa Emeritus II's face. You hide your face with your hand. You're confused, and hurt, and don't know where to go from here. You feel something wet dripping down the side of your face. It takes you a moment to realize that it's your own tears. You didn't notice that you started crying again. You don't cry that easily.

The next day, you wait to see if Papa Emeritus II acknowledges you. You see him at the bottom of the staircase. He is looking up, staring off into the distance. You wave to catch his attention, but he does not wave back. You approach slowly, with your head down.

"Hullo, Papa." You say.

"Cirice." He says to you, nodding his head. "Did you need something?" He asks.

"No, I was just coming to see if you needed any help."

"No, I'm fine. I wanted to speak with you though."

"Of course. Anything you need." You say.

> You wince internally at the desperation in your voice.

"I need you." He says. Your face turns bright red and feels warm under your skin. You wince and cross your arms, looking away.

"I don't know what to do with you." You say.

Papa Emeritus II has the self awareness to look ashamed. Not many people have seen Papa Emeritus II in this state; forlorn, remorseful, and entirely human.

"You can do what you like," he says. "You can do anything you like."

You turn to look at him and uncross your arms. You close the distance and put a gentle hand on his chest and on his arm.

"I want to help you." You say.

"You already do." Papa Emeritus II says. And there it is. The faintest ghost of a smile. You touch his cheek and turn him to face you.

> You say "Can I kiss you?"

He stares at you with wide eyes, before smiling faintly.

"Yes." You kiss him.

You kiss him again. And you keep kissing him until you're both breathless. You remember that you're standing in the stairwell of the office building. You hold him with your hands on the sides of his face, stroking his cheek. Papa Emeritus II looks at you with shining eyes.

"Thank you." He says, before leaning in for another kiss.

[zafirosreverie]

TW antisemitism // homophobia

Some tell me I was a dirty jew f*got 😭

- ⚔️

WHO THE FUCK CALLED YOU THAT?! NAMES, GIMME NAMES!

[booksforthegays]

“Take a Hint, Dani Brown” by Talia Hibbert

Description: Danika Brown knows what she wants: professional success, academic renown, and an occasional roll in the hay to relieve all that career-driven tension. But romance? Been there, done that, burned the T-shirt. Romantic partners, whatever their gender, are a distraction at best and a drain at worst. So Dani asks the universe for the perfect friend-with-benefits—someone who knows the score and knows their way around the bedroom. When brooding security guard Zafir Ansari rescues Dani from a workplace fire drill gone wrong, it’s an obvious sign: PhD student Dani and ex-rugby player Zaf are destined to sleep together. But before she can explain that fact, a video of the heroic rescue goes viral. Now half the internet is shipping #DrRugbae—and Zaf is begging Dani to play along. Turns out, his sports charity for kids could really use the publicity. Lying to help children? Who on earth would refuse?

Representation: The main character, Danika, is black and bisexual. Her love interest Zafir is Pakistani. Additionally, the author is a person of color.

Genre: Romance Length: 320 TW(s): Loss of family member, panic attacks, depression

[noretreatnancy]

January Reading Wrap-Up

Okay so I want to start typing up a little summary/review for each of the books I read this year, so that maybe some of my followers can find some new titles! This month I read 5 romances, 2 fantasies, 2 non-fiction (a memoir and a recounting of some supposedly true paranormal events), and 1 mystery/thriller. If you’re interested in any of those genres, maybe check out the reviews under the cut :)

Mystery/Thriller

Lock Every Door by Riley Sager

Rating: 2.5/5

This book was a mega disappointment for me. The concept was really intriguing. Jules has just recently been through some life turmoil, losing her job, boyfriend, and home in the same day. She takes a job apartment sitting in a very prestigious historical building with a dark history. Weird occurrences ensue, including strict rules and missing apartment sitters. If you don’t read/watch a lot of mystery/thriller/(even true crime) content and are interested in dabbling, this could be a good choice for you. Unfortunately, I found the hints started dropping a little too early, and the answers were a little too obvious for me to be properly intrigued. I wanted a really slow burn mystery, and this just felt overly rushed for me. 

Non-Fic

In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado (memoir)

Rating: 5/5

I don’t usually rate non-fiction, especially memoirs, because it’s hard for me to but a grade on someone’s account of their own life. But holy shit this book blew me out of the water. This is the story of Carmen Maria Machado’s abusive same-sex relationship, and the unique struggles faced by victims of f/f relationship violence. First of all, Machado’s writing is unparralled. Absolutely gorgeous. The way she structures this, all the history and pop culture she ties in keeps it feeling fresh and engaging. The content is of course very heavy, dealing with themes of abuse in many different forms. However, imo these issues are handled with honesty and grace, in a way that never felt gratuitous. 

The Mothman Prophecies by John Keel (paranormal account)

Rating: N/A

Uhm... I hated every second of reading this. I love Mothman. I love reading/watching/listening to content around weird/spooky/paranormal occurrences. I did not love this book. It was so boring. Total slog to read. There was no narrative structure/order of events. I assumed the story would track the beginning of weird reports in Point Pleasant, then follow Keel’s own arrival and investigation of these reports, with his own experiences and background being used to create a coherent story. That’s not what this is. This is a random arrangement of ufo/men in black/strange encounter stories that all fit a similar theme. Not to say no one would enjoy this, or that it doesn’t present interesting theories (it certainly does), just didn’t work for me. If you want a more easily digestible (and by FAR more enjoyable) version of this, check out the Astonishing Legends podcast and their episodes covering this book. 

Fantasy

Black Sun (Book 1, Between Earth and Sky) by Rebecca Roanhorse

Ratung: 4/5

Finally some good fucking food. if you’re looking for some adult fantasy with a new and interesting world, have I got a book for you. This is a multiple POV story following four main characters and two main plotlines. Xiala, a Teek (siren-esque) ship captain hired to transport Serapio (who may or may not be the vessel of an apocalypse god) to the city of Tova, where Naranpa (the Sun Priestess) is trying to navigate a city on the brink of political upheaval. The world is inspired by Pre-Columbian civilizations in the Americas, and the lore/magic/politics are all totally unlike any other fantasy I’ve read. 

Come Tumbling Down (Book 5, Wayward Children) by Seanan McGuire

Rating: 3

This was definitely a solid addition to this series, if not my favorite. The Wayward Children series follows the adventures of children who were able to enter magical worlds, but for a variety of reasons had to leave those worlds. This book most closely aligns with books one and two, almost feeling like a direct sequel to book two with the addition of characters from book three. It didn’t have the emotional impact for me that earlier books did, but there was nothing glaringly bad or wrong here. I would definitely recommend this series to anyone who enjoyed portal/doorway/wardrobe to a magical world stories as a kid. 

Romance

The Bride Test (Book 2, The Kiss Quotient) by Helen Hoang

Rating: 5/5

I love this series. I love these characters. As far as I’m concerned, Helen Hoang cannot fucking miss. This is an excellent sequel to The Kiss Quotient, but can be read on it’s own no problem. This story follows Esme, a Vietnamese woman who is enlisted to travel to the US to woo and marry Khai, an autistic man who isn’t interested in dating (much to the concern of his mother). They’re both dealing with their own issues in this book. Khai is convinced that he can’t feel love, because he’s spent his entire life being told he’s demonstrating it in the wrong way. Esme is dealing with the struggles of a new immigrant, who wants to be able to support her family back in Vietnam (including her young daughter), while also dealing with the pressure to seduce Khai. Shenanigans ensue. These books have the perfect balance of sweetness/sexy appeal/angst. There is a good deal of miscommunication/misunderstanding/secret keeping in here, but it’d ultimately a minor issue in an overall really supportive relationship full of mutual admiration. I will absolutely be reading the third book, and I highly recommend the series overall. 

She Tempts the Duke (Book 1, Lost Lords of Pembrook) by Lorraine Heath

Rating: 3/5

This was fine. I’ve read better historical romance, but I have certainly read worse. This book follows Mary and Sebastian, childhood friends separated by a tragedy. When they were children, Sebastian and his brothers were forced to flee for their lives based on the actions of their power hungry uncle. Now, as adults, they have returned to reclaim their father’s title. Mary, who helped them escape, has just been allowed back into society after a childhood in a convent, and she must work extra hard to maintain her reputation in order to maintain her engagement. I’m sure you can imagine where it goes from there. The story itself is very simple, there were no twists or unexpected turns. The childhood friends aspect could’ve been played up more imo, but I did enjoy the care between the two leads. They really want what’s best for each other. The most interesting aspect for me was the relationship between the brothers, and how they’ve all been changed and hardened by their pasts.

Spoiler Alert by Olivia Dade

Rating: 3.5/5

This was cute! The book follows Marcus (a major actor in a GOT-esque blockbuster fantasy TV show on the rocks) and April (fan of the show). April and Marcus both write fanfiction for the same ship (half of which is Marcus’s own character), and have developed a strong online friendship, both keeping their identities secret. If anyone were to find out that Marcus writes show critical fanfic, he would be in serious legal trouble, not to mention what it would do to his reputation. April has been keeping her fandom life separate from her real life, in order to maintain credibility in her career. However, a new work environment gives her the confidence to be more open about her passions. April posts a cosplay of herself as one of the characters from the show (the other half of their ship). April is plus-size, and her cosplay gets a lot of attention, some of which being internet typical negativity. Marcus sees this hate online, and is so upset by it that he publicly praises her and asks her on a date (not knowing April is his fanfic buddy). Shenanigans ensue. I liked this book a lot, I thought the concept was cute and I loved how sweet Marcus was at all times. The relationship felt really grounded in the friendship/common interests of the characters. There is a lot of misunderstanding/miscommunication in this book, to the point where I did become frustrated, even if it is understandable based on the insecurities of the characters. 

Take A Hint, Dani Brown (Book 2, The Brown Sisters) by Talia Hibbert

Rating: 4/5

Zaf I am in love with you. This is the second book in the series but you can totally read it on its own without the context of the first book. This is the story of Dani (a bi phd student with a no relationship rule) and Zaf (an ex-pro rugby player turned security guard who loves romance novels and deals with extreme anxiety). Zaf and Dani work in the same building on a college campus, and have developed a casual friendship. During a fire drill gone wrong, a video of Zaf rescuing Dani goes viral, with everyone thinking they are a couple. Zaf wants to use the publicity to help his charity organization (helping teen boys learn emotional maturity), Dani wants a no-strings sex arrangement with Zaf, fake-dating ensues. This series is the blueprint for healthy relationships built on mutual respect and admiration, with two characters learning to deal with their own issues with the help and support of their potential romantic partner. If you don’t usually read romance bc of the genre-typical problematic content, consider checking this series out. 

One Foot in the Grave (Book 2, Night Huntress) by Jeaniene Frost

Rating: 3/5

This series follows Cat, a half human/half vampire hybrid who hunts vampires. In this book, set four years after the first, she is the leader of a vampire hunting secret government kill squad. Her ex-lover, the vampire Bones, who trained her and is basically the love of her life, reappears after four years of separation. They are very, very obviously Buffy and Spike (if Spike was a good guy). It was better than the first one. More/better humor, Cat is much less annoying. I liked the relationship dynamics, particularly with Cat and her team. It really kind of negates the big conflict set up at the end of the first book, so that all the relationship drama there feels very pointless. There is a TON of woman/woman hate in this series and it’s so cringey. I try to be lenient bc the books are old and I know that kind of attitude was common back then, but oh my god is it gross and weird. There is literally ONE female character Cat views in a positive lights, and she literally disappears into thin air 1/4 of the through the book. I wish the romance wasn’t so rushed (a complaint I had in the first book as well). If you like paranormal romance and don’t mind a pretty dated read, this series could be fun for you. 

Other

Rooms by Lauren Oliver

Rating: 3/5

I have no idea what genre to call this (literary fiction?? kind of??). It’s a ghost story and the story of a pretty messed up family dealing with their issues. The writing is really pretty, but the story feels kind of without substance. Like there are multiple POVs (the two ghosts haunting the house, the mother of the family, the sister and the brother, the niece), but none of them really struck any cords with me. I never felt emotionally connected to anyone. It was a really easy read, I enjoyed the writing. The concept was interesting. It just felt a little hollow and pointless to me, which sounds really harsh considering I by no means hated it. 

[surejaya]

Take a Hint, Dani Brown (The Brown Sisters, #2)

Download : Take a Hint, Dani Brown (The Brown Sisters, #2) More Book at: Zaqist Book

Take a Hint, Dani Brown (The Brown Sisters, #2) by Talia Hibbert

Talia Hibbert returns with another charming romantic comedy about a young woman who agrees to fake date her friend after a video of him “rescuing” her from their office building goes viral... Danika Brown knows what she wants: professional success, academic renown, and an occasional roll in the hay to relieve all that career-driven tension. But romance? Been there, done that, burned the T-shirt. Romantic partners, whatever their gender, are a distraction at best and a drain at worst. So Dani asks the universe for the perfect friend-with-benefits—someone who knows the score and knows their way around the bedroom. When brooding security guard Zafir Ansari rescues Dani from a workplace fire drill gone wrong, it’s an obvious sign: PhD student Dani and ex-rugby player Zaf are destined to sleep together. But before she can explain that fact, a video of the heroic rescue goes viral. Now half the internet is shipping #DrRugbae—and Zaf is begging Dani to play along. Turns out, his sports charity for kids could really use the publicity. Lying to help children? Who on earth would refuse? Dani’s plan is simple: fake a relationship in public, seduce Zaf behind the scenes. The trouble is, grumpy Zaf’s secretly a hopeless romantic—and he’s determined to corrupt Dani’s stone-cold realism. Before long, he’s tackling her fears into the dirt. But the former sports star has issues of his own, and the walls around his heart are as thick as his... um, thighs. Suddenly, the easy lay Dani dreamed of is more complex than her thesis. Has her wish backfired? Is her focus being tested? Or is the universe just waiting for her to take a hint?

Download : Take a Hint, Dani Brown (The Brown Sisters, #2) More Book at: Zaqist Book

[undermised]

Zaf when are you going to continue that comic (if you know what I mean)😎

HEY SHABB, PLEASE NOT HERE THERES CHILDREN-BTW idk I'll finish it if I have the mood

[rxsmyers-a]

⚠ 🌟 ☯

Morality Meme@soldierwithoutaname

⚠: Would they seek revenge against someone who's harmed them or the people they care about?

You so picked this one deliberately didn’t you?

In short: that’s fucking canon.  

For those not familiar with the show, Ros joined Spooks as an MI-6 officer working with her superior on a coup led by her father.  Ros switched sides and convinced her father to stand down, expecting leniency from the government in order to hide how close the British government had come to being replaced.  Harry, now her boss as she’d moved to MI-5, said he would do his best to get a light sentence for Ros’ father.

Well, Harry failed, and Ros’ already-elderly father was sentenced to twenty years in prison.  Harry kept this fact from Ros for several days, feeling the knowledge would compromise her effectiveness on a current operation.

Ros was not happy.  Like, really really not happy.  It’s a toss-up which she was angrier about: feeling like Harry had lied to her about helping her father, or the fact that he felt she was so delicate that she couldn’t handle the news and keep working.

To demonstrate her unhappiness she basically destroyed the life of one of her colleagues, Ruth, who sort of had a thing with Harry.  (Ros calls her Harry’s rose-tinted blind spot, and this is a valid description.)  This had nothing to do with Ruth and everything to do Ros’ anger at Harry.  In the end, Ruth had to fake her death and flee England, due in part to Ros’ actions.  It was a massive blow to Harry, which was exactly what Ros wanted in the first place.  He’d hurt her, and now she’d hurt him.  

So in short, Ros is a fucking vindictive bitch when you hurt her.  

AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON ROS’ ANGER WHEN YOU HURT ONE OF HER COLLEAGUES.  

So one time there was a high-end arms dealer that MI-5 sent in officers undercover to buy a bomb from.  He assaulted, with the intention of raping, one of those officers, and nearly killed her.  MI-5 were told they couldn’t take action against him because MI-6 needed him as an asset.  

Ros poured scalding hot coffee on his manbits and smiled as she did it.  There was  even a quip, I believe.

When Zaf was kidnapped by a bunch of mercenaries and the intelligence said the Americans were behind it, Ros actively betrayed Section D by joining an independent anti-American group called Yalta.  Yes, I think she had a lot of reasons for joining Yalta, but I also think that one of the foremost on her mind was revenge against the country that had harmed and taken her colleague.

And sure, Ros hated Sarah from the get go, but let me tell you, a good 60% of straight up shooting Sarah was because Sarah had hurt Lucas.

So, in short, Ros is also a fucking vindictive bitch when you hurt her colleagues.

🌟: Do they consider themselves a good person?

I like the way Jo puts it: “...you have a job where black and white looks so clean.  Mine is not even grey, it’s... patchy.  Mottled.  Can’t even tell what’s color and what’s... murk.”  Now when one of the kinder, gentler, more moral members of Section D looks at their world that way, how does Ros, who’s infinitely more complex and pragmatic (and, in my headcanon at least, a trained assassin), look at it?

In the end, I think Ros sees herself as a good person.  There’s (almost) nothing she’s done that’s ever been solely for her own benefit; everything, including the coup and Yalta, have been because she saw a higher purpose in them that would benefit the people and the country she’s been sworn to protect for over a decade.

She just doesn’t expect anyone outside the people who live in the same world she does to see her that way.

☯: What do they think of 'good' and 'evil'?

Terms for children, or for the people she dirties herself to protect so that they can go on thinking the world is as simple as ‘good’ and ‘evil’.