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silver-stake-through-the-heart · 3 months ago

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Obsessed with the implication of the word "vessel," and that the "God coming after the children" and the so-called "revenge" could have been smokescreen for a deep loyalty to God.

- OR - A deep feeling that God should be replaced, scattered, made in a new way with a new vessel and a new outlook. "He should be in everything." etc etc

Yes! Saying vessel is such a choice.

I. "God coming after the children"

Let's start by the Abraham and Isaac comparison.

In the Genesis, God promises Abraham and Sarah they'll have a son and sends Isaac to them. It's His meddling. Years later, He asks Abraham to sacrifice Isaac for Him to prove his loyalty, and when He is convinced a ram is sacrificed at Isaac's place.

The whole story is quite famous. There's no way the spn writers wouldn't have it into mind when Chuck goes all "Lookit, the– the– the gathering storm, the gun, the– the father killing his own son. This is Abraham and Isaac. This is epic!" (14x20) So it poses the question of how much he meddled for Jack to be born and for what reason.

Seraphina insists on Jack's birth being meant to happen thousands and thousands of years ago, betraying what looks like usual Heaven's plans to perpetuate the bloodlines that interest them. And those bloodlines are vessels. Her saying "Jack, making your vessel strong, reclaiming your human soul, it was... it was all preparing you for this." could be a slip showing the true motivations behind the trials.

Because it shouldn't be a vessel! Jack is a Nephilim. This body is his and he's born into it.

II. Adam: a revenge-seeking father or a loyalist?

There are several options for this but none of them are good for TFW.

1 – Adam is a pure John mirror. He really believes in his vengeance but he's only a puppet used by Chuck.

2 – Adam knows it's only a transfer and he and Seraphina are manipulating Dean and Jack by saying their plan is to kill God. He's either doing so for Chuck, either against him.

There's a problem with Adam's motivation here, even if he's aiming for the transfer of Chuck power. Like you pointed out, he has this little exchange with Jack:

Jack: They're just rocks but their existence makes them divine. Because God is in everything. Adam: Right on. At least, he should be.

Which feels a little too much like Jack's quote in 15x19:

I'm around. I'll be in every drop of falling rain, every speck of dust that the wind blows, and in the sand, in the rocks, and the sea.

Return to 15x17

Chuck wasn't God's vessel at the beginning, when all Adam's problems happened (the snake, being kicked out of paradise, going after Cain and Abel). When Metatron (one of the few angels who have seen his face) faced Chuck, he was annoyed by that prophet. Which means the Power is the real entity, and Seraphina and he (and Billie and the Empty) are only offering it a new vessel.

3 – Seraphina knows it's only a transfer, and she manipulated Adam the whole time. She's Chuck's pawn. How she could have gotten free from Heaven 300,000 years ago? Why does she still have enough power to keep a human alive all this time?

Little aside: Chuck used many of his old characters in this season: Lilith (technically Adam's first wife, brought back twice), Michael (after Adam Milligan's death), Lucifer… so why would Adam be any different?

III. Chuck's powers and manipulations

Later in the episode, Chuck is shown being able to mess with Amara's head (his equal) enough to push her to give up and yield her power and will to him.

Chuck: This is my ending. My real ending. Amara: You orchestrated this? Chuck: What part of omniscient do you people not understand? So I can't read my "Death Book." So what? I control space and time. Just plant a few visions, goad Death a little… Mess with a few outcomes… And… bada-bing!

#asks #spn 15x17 #chuck and jack #spn meta #< he's a writer. writers lie >#< in the end i always get what i want >

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noxemma · 9 days ago

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--- Sorry this part took so long. I thought I could avoid the AO3 curse by keeping it to tumblr but it hunted me down anyways. I'm still a little burnt out (being primary caretaker for two nonagenarians and still managing a 40hr work week will do that to a person) so I'm sorry if this is a bit shorter and heavier than the previous parts (I promise there will be fluff and regularly scheduled shenanigans in future parts) 🫠 --- Too many emotions swirl in Cas' brain for him to think past simply getting him and Dean away from his family and back to the relative safety and sanctuary of their room. He wants to close the blinds and pull Dean into bed and do his best to travel back in time to this morning when Dean's arms were wrapped around him. He wants to kiss Dean again. He wants to- "Dude, what- What was that?" Dean asks breathlessly, Cas assumes from being dragged down flights of stairs in his rushed escape, not daring to hope it could be from anything else. "What was what?" Cas answers, purposely trying not to understand. Because he knows he'll have to apologize for springing the kiss onto Dean with no warning, especially after he'd been the one to suggest minimal displays of affection in front of his parents and family. And the truth is, he's not sorry at all. Even though the circumstances were not ideal, not one molecule of his being regrets kissing Dean.

Not after he'd defended him in a way no one else had against the doubt he was up against. He hadn't truly even been aware of how heavily his own fears and insecurities about his ability to raise Jack had been weighing on him until Dean had declared, to everyone, how good he was doing. He'd wanted to cry in that moment, had felt lighter than he had in years to have someone, aside from Gabriel who really didn't count, tell him he was doing a good job, that all the stress and strain and worrying was worth it.

"You know what. That, the, uh, the kiss," Dean huffs. "What about the kiss?" Cas stalls again, their footsteps ringing in the stairwell. "I thought- I thought you said you didn't really have much experience-" "I don't," Cas confirms, cutting off the rest of Dean's sentence. "Okay, so, again, what the hell was that?" Cas spares a glance back and sees Dean's fingers pressed to his lip, green eyes burning into him. He gulps and opens his mouth to try and give some kind of explanation. "I, I don't know. I learned that from the pizza man?" "The pizza man?" Dean repeats incredulously. "I- uh," Cas starts, realizing they've stalled somewhere between the penthouse and their floor. "Castiel! Dean! D-damn you two are, are fast," Gabriel wheezes, placing his hands on his knees and gulping air. "Gabriel? You followed us?" "'course I did. Had to- Had to make sure you were okay. And I wanted to thank Dean for standing up for you," Gabriel manages once he's mostly recovered. He turns to Dean. "Seriously, I don't think I've ever seen anyone stand up to them like that. It was truly a pleasure. If you want anything I'd be more than happy to-" "Who the fuck is the pizza man?" Dean blurts not even waiting for Gabriel to finish. "The pizza man?" Gabriel asks in confusion. "We really should get out of this stairwell," Cas says, trying to distract them and cringing when Gabriel's eyes light up. "Gabriel, no!" "The pizza man! God, I almost forgot about that!" "Gabriel, please-" "Back when Cas was a teen and just sort of figuring everything out, he was kind of nosy and too damn curious for his own good. He found my stash of porn tapes and," Gabriel covers Cas' mouth before he can protest again, Cas clawing at his strong grip. "And it was sort of traumatizing to him. You wouldn't believe the questions I had to answer like 'If the pizza man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep smacking her on the rear?' and 'why didn't the repairman and the pizza man kiss?' I tried to tell him that there's plenty of good porn, he just happened to pick a crappy one, but, well, he was thoroughly traumatized. Pretty sure it's still the only porno he's ever seen. Ouch!"

Cas finally gets desperate enough to bite Gabriel's hand. His brother jerks back with a pout, shaking the wounded limb but Cas just rolls his eyes. "Thank you so much, dear brother, for expounding on my porn preferences, or lack thereof," Cas growls in his direction, though he keeps his eyes focused on the stairs, wondering if Dean would hold it against him if he escaped down them away from the awkward bubble they're now in.

"Bullshit," Dean finally says, "There is no way you learned to kiss like that from just watching a crappy porno." "Well, believe it or not, that's the truth. You're the first person I've ever kissed," Cas huffs. He doesn't understand the edge of hurt and disbelief in Dean's voice and honestly doesn't have the energy to try and figure it out at the present moment. The bed, several more floors beneath him, calls with a siren's voice and all he wants to do is shuck the uncomfortable clothes he'd shoved himself into and hide from the world for a few hours, preferably with Dean. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! That was your first kiss," Gabriel states, eyes darting between Dean and him. "What? Pshh, no, we've just, uh, we've never-" Dean immediately responds, defending Cas yet again, though this time it hurts. Pain makes him go rigid, his lungs brittle.

Dean is lying for me, even when he doesn't seem to trust that I've been honest with him. Perhaps it's not just me then, maybe he's defensive of everyone? Or maybe he just sees me as someone to take care of, like his brother.

The thought is unbearable, so Cas blurts, "Gabriel, we're not actually dating." Two sets of eyes and slack jaws swing his way. "I'll explain, but can we please go back to the room." Neither Dean nor Gabriel objects nor stops him as he begins down the stairs again, only the echo of their footsteps breaking the silence. --- Once the hotel door has shut behind everyone, Cas heaves a sigh of relief and yanks off the button up so he's just in an undershirt and the slacks that will have to do until he's done answering the millions of questions he sees bubbling on his older brother's tongue. "Dean and I met several days ago when he accidentally abducted Jack-" "He what!" "Jack had heard me on the phone describing my fake date to you and Dean was supposed to be picking up his brother at the same corner I asked Jack to meet me," Cas continues on flatly, ignoring the concerned looks he's getting from both Gabriel and Dean. "Jack mistook him for the 'date' and got into his car. Dean had just worked for a long time and was too tired to realize it wasn't his brother. He returned him as soon as he realized his mistake and he offered to help me out as an apology and, well, things just kind of spiraled into him pretending to be my boyfriend and then my fiancé in order to get Chuck and Naomi to stop threating to petition for custody of Jack. Now if you'll excuse me, I plan to sleep for the next few hours so I don't go out, find a liquor store, and drink it." Cas finally finishes, throwing himself onto the bed as all his remaining energy leaves him. "Castiel-" Gabriel starts and Cas buries his face in the comforter to keep his brother from seeing or hearing how he's gasping for air and fighting against the hammering of his pulse, anxiety raising its hands to choke him again. "Gabe, I think it's best if you go." Cas hears Dean's voice interrupt firmly, drifting away from the bed and towards the door amidst Gabriel's protests. "Look, I'll have Cas text you as soon as he's up again, but right now I think he needs some rest. This morning was ... a lot. For everyone." There's a pause like Gabriel has his mouth open to argue, but then Cas hears him agree, threating some creative form of bodily harm if Dean doesn't take good care of him. The door clicks shut and he can hear Dean come back towards the bed. "I'm, I'm fine, Dean," Cas lies, his watery words and hiccupped breath betraying him. "You're not, and that's okay. What do you need from me?" "I- I don't-" Cas can't manage to finish, the weight that had been lifted by Dean earlier seeming to crash down on his chest tenfold heavier. "Okay, it's okay. How 'bout I give you a few suggestions that usually work for me and we can see if one sounds good to you?" Dean asks gently, the bed dipping from where he sits next to Cas' prone, heaving body. He must manage a nod or something close to an approximation of agreement because Dean continues. "One thing that helps me is movies or tv shows, something to play in the background and drown out all the shit going on in my head. Or, um, I could help you try to regulate your breathing. Um, or, well, I don't know if it would really help or not, but I could, uh, I could hold you? Like this morning?" Cas bites back a sob long enough to whisper "please" and he hopes Dean understands. He does and Cas can't help but question whether or not he's a real person and not some divine being.

Dean rises from the bed. Cas briefly hears the television flip on, volume low enough that it's not overwhelming but loud enough to distract from the noise of his panicking mind.

Then Dean is there beside him. The heat of him warming the parts of Cas he hadn't realized had gone numb. Cas instinctually turns toward him, a far reach of his brain whispering something about heliotropism before it's drowned out again. Dean's forehead rests against his, their feet tangled together, one of Dean's arms around him. Cas can feel Dean's heartbeat from where his hand ended up flat against Dean's chest. It's strong and steady and soothing. Slowly, Cas feels his lungs give up their rebellion, his mind raising a white flag as he leans into the comfort Dean offers, his breathing and heartrate slowing to synchronize with Dean's.

"There we go, sweetheart," Dean murmurs, breath hot against Cas' face. "That's it, just breathe." "Dean, I'm. I'm so sorry. You," Cas sucks in a deep breath as his lungs still ache, "You didn't ask for any of this." "No," Dean agrees, but the free hand not pressing against Cas' back comes up to grip his neck and cheek, "But no one really does." Cas tries to laugh, but it comes out as another sob. "Dean-" "Shhh, Cas. You probably had or are having a panic attack and the adrenaline crash is imminent. Let yourself rest for a bit and we can talk when you wake up and feel better." Cas wants to give in to the soft words, wants to slip away into sleep in Dean's arms, but he can't. A sharp kernel of worry refusing to let him be totally comfortable. "I'm sorry about the kiss, or whatever was bothering you about it after. I really didn't plan on doing it, but well, the way that you stood up for yourself and for me? I needed to do something. And I didn't mean to upset you in the stairwell or-" "Cas, shit. If anyone needs to apologize, it's me. You were clearly already freaking out and distressed and I made it worse because, well, uh, because that was probably one of the best kisses I've ever had and, it just didn't. I mean, I'm really supposed to believe that a guy like you hasn't been kissed?" "Well, I have been kissed before, but I don't like to count those as none of them were with people I wanted to kiss me. They were all women my mother set me up with to try and 'straighten' me out," Cas tries to laugh at his own joke but he can't, eyes scrunch shut so he doesn't have to see how Dean's reacting to this information. "I have never been the one to initiate the kissing and well, you are the first man I've kissed." Dean pulls him tighter, the unexpected reaction forcing a soft moan to escape from Cas as Dean buries his face into Cas' neck, his chest crushing into Cas' arms, their hips now flush as Dean leaves no space between them. "I'm so fucking sorry, Cas. That's- no one should- It's fucked up." It feels validating and different to have Dean telling him this. He finds himself able to believe it more coming from the man holding him than from his own brother or even from his therapist, both of which feel like they are obligated to respond that way. "Thank you, Dean." He wants to say more, to tell Dean how grateful he is to have the acknowledgement, to have someone here to listen and hold him. He wants to kiss Dean again. He can't quite bring himself to do it though, can't quite override the anxiety still swirling in his brain. So, he settles for pressing his lips to Dean's temple and letting his hands unlock from their protective position in front of his chest to wrap around Dean's back. Drawing as close to Dean as Dean had drawn to him. Dean hums into his neck, his hand rubbing up and down Cas' back and more tension slips away. --- For the second time in twenty-four hours Cas wakes wrapped in Dean's arms and feeling lighter than he has in years. "Hey, you feeling better?" Dean whispers, somehow sensing that he's awake.

"I, um, yes, thank you. This, you, were really grounding and," Cas finally opens his eyes to see Dean's green one's staring back, full to the brim of compassion without an ounce of judgement.

I don't think I've leaned on anyone so much besides Gabriel. And he pretty much blackmailed me into it because taking his, or rather, our family's money, was to better provide for Jack.

It makes his stomach clench with guilt and regret. If he had been overwhelmed enough to have a panic attack, he can only imagine how Dean must be feeling.

"I'm sorry again, Dean. Dealing with my family was probably hard enough with them questioning you and then you had to deal with my ... breakdown," Cas whispers, not even sure that Dean can hear him. "Hey, hey, none of that!" Dean grabs Cas and keeps him from accidentally scooting himself the whole way off the edge of the bed. "Cas, seriously. It's fine. I've had my own 'breakdowns.' And if all this shit is a normal occurrence? I'd probably be more worried if you were able to keep it together." Dean reaches out and brushes a thumb across his cheek.

Cas sucks in a breath and closes his eyes, turning his face into the pillow when Dean doesn't let him escape to the floor. "Sweetheart." The petname and the gentle way he says it makes Cas bury his face further into the pillow and away from eyes that are too kind and too understanding. "Cas, I know you probably feel embarrassed, but really, it's not like you could help it. Trust me, I know. Sometimes it just hits you out of nowhere." "You have panic attacks," Cas realizes far too late for all the signs that have been flashing right in front of his face. Sam helping calm him down when he was starting to panic about Jack, Dean knowing how to get him calm and grounding him, even getting Gabriel out of the room, giving him options but ultimately taking control when Cas couldn't. "Yeah," Dean lets out a shaky breath and Cas can't resist the urge to look at him. "Yeah, I do. Not so bad anymore but they used to get really, really bad. Mostly after fights with my dad, so believe me when I say I get it. I thought I was dying the first time Bobby found me dry heaving on the kitchen floor. He's the one who taught me it's better to have someone to hold on to whenever the bad one's hit." "I'm so sorry, Dean," Cas finds himself saying, mirroring Dean's touch.

Dean closes his eyes and leans into it and Cas has the overwhelming desire to give him the world, though he's not even sure himself what that entails. He just knows, like he knows how to breathe, that Dean deserves more than what life has given him, deserves good things. And Cas desperately, perhaps selfishly, wants to be the one to give them to him. Cas is just leaning in to press his lips to Dean's again when Dean's eyes pop open and he heaves in a breath. "Well, I guess you should probably let Gabriel know that you are up. I'm sure he's still worrying." "Oh. Right. What time is it?" Cas replies as he pulls back, his little bubble bursting and reality rushing back in. "Uh, not sure. But my guess is probably around two-ish?" "Two? And you've been stuck here with me the whole time?" "Stuck? Cas, you act like you handcuffed me to the bed or something. Besides, what else would I do, huh? Go downstairs and play slots? Hope to run into your family at the bar or casino? And leave you here by yourself? To wake up alone and feeling guilty or ashamed? Nope, sorry. Like I told your family, you're stuck with me, babe. At least until we get back to California."

Cas doesn't try to stop the smile or the warmth that fills his being at the thought of being stuck with Dean, even if it's just temporarily. "Now, I'm pretty sure I've heard your phone buzz at least six times so you should let Gabriel know that I haven't killed you or whatever he's probably coming up with since he found out I'm practically a stranger. Not to mention the fact that I flipped the dead bolt so he wouldn't be able to sneak in like this morning." "Oh, god! He's probably two seconds away from breaking the door down with the cops!" Cas groans, as he flips around to scramble for his phone on the nightstand. But it's not messages from Gabriel that he's missed. Or at least not just from Gabriel. Mixed in amongst the suggestive jokes and true brotherly concern are several messages from Jack, the most concerning of which being: See you soon, Dad!

Tag List (hopefully I got everyone but just shout at me if I missed you 😅)

@destielfangirl24 @chokinghazardchirp @o-birdseed-o @examishbookwyrm @planterflush @t0asssty @dead-sirens @hate-babe-27 @profanitybasedfun @azriel-rodas @ghost-in-the-light

#agh sorry this got so serious #gabe for sure tried to get back into their room with his keycard #why (and how) do you y'all think Jack is coming to Vegas?#somehow they just keep winding up in that one bed lol #i'm not going to look too closely at the bad father references on Father's Day so you shouldn't either 🥸#focus on Cas and Dean and Bobby - this day is to celebrate them and not the Chuck's and John's of the world #also for anyone in a caretaker position (whether it's for the elderly or kids or animals or whatever) you are doing a great job #even if no one tells you or acknowledges the effort you're putting in - you're doing great and I'm proud of you #steering through the rearview #destiel #spn #supernatural #dean winchester #castiel #tumblr fic #destiel wip

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