Was looking up things about q!Antoine (as a normal and sane person do) and I am really intrigued and fascinated by his thoughts on the election and everyone. If you think q!BBH doesn't trust easy, q!Antoine doesn't trust ANYONE.
There is notes on a lot of the residents in his secret room (called literally "The End of the World" BTW if you even care) and some parts I find captivating and wanted to share here : (caught those on his page on the wiki, he said he will show us more of those at a later date)
About q!Cellbit :
"His favourite thing was to hang out with Cucurucho. Is he the real Federation candidate ? It is too obvious that Elquackity is corrupted, nobody in good conscience can vote for him. Elquackity is a distraction, a decoy. [...] Knows way more than what he says, must not give him more power than what he already has."
About q!Forever :
"Close to BBH and Baghera. The three of them were acting really strangely but that behavior is dying down with the election (keeping informations to themselves, secret meetings). He doesn't seem to follow the same train of thoughts than BBH and Baghera. He wants to become president but act like those who "don't really want to be". Has a strange and clouded relationship with Cellbit."
Then there is what he thinks about the others that he said onstream, and that I'm pulling from memory right now :
About q!BBH and q!Baghera : He seems to think they can be adequate for president but REALLY doesn't like the way they are secretive about a lot of things relating to the island and their plans, making them too untrustworthy to become president to him.
He's said multiple times that his favorite candidates are q!Mike and Gegg, but he has reservations : q!Mike to him has good ideas, but similarly to some, wants to be president a bit too much to be trusted in his opinion. As for Gegg, q!Antoine basically agrees with everything he said, but thinks the Federation is way too powerful for it to be achievable.
To him the elections are pointless and only serves the federation. He agrees with a lot of ideas of a lot of candidates, but thinks it doesn't matter since the Federation remains the ones in power, and WILL have the final word on everything. His wish would be to not play the Federation's game, but then again you can't let someone like ElQuackity or Foolish win.
As of now what he decided to do, is keep an eye on everyone and everything happening, while not taking part in anything.
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i was talking about stan and his OCD the other day but i didn't really talk about how the other losers would act about it. so!
please remember that OCD is a varied condition and not everyone with it is like what is depicted in this post!
bill
at first stan keeps his obsessions to himself, he's pretty aware of what is a "typical" thought process and what is his brain being kinda weird
but eventually bill finds him having a panic attack over something seemingly mundane. young stan to me had obsessions that focused on the supernatural and "curses", so something like opening an umbrella indoors throws him into hysterics
and as soon as he realizes what he's doing he's humiliated, because like who the fuck cares? everyone knows that's just a stupid superstition, and he's so worried bill's going to think he's a weirdo or a coward
but bill is like. extremely reasonable about it, i think he's used to georgie getting upset over seemingly nonsensical things (the way kids do), so he's just used to treating things he doesn't understand with severity.
maybe there's nothing scary to him about opening an umbrella indoors, but its clearly upset stan and that's what matters here. he calmly asks him what he's upset about and reassures him that if it upsets him then its important
he gets stan to talk through it, bill brings up how richie always opens his umbrella indoors but nothing bad has ever happened to him because of it, which doesn't help a ton because OCD isn't typically very reasonable, but it helps a bit, and stan calms down enough that bill bringing up richie prompts him to go off on a rant about something stupid richie did at school while bill was gone
eddie
despite not having OCD eddie gets it, especially after he finds out that he isn't actually sick
eddie is the first person stan chooses to tell about the weird circles his brain runs in, because he knows eddie still carries around his fake inhaler
eddie isn't scared of the same things stan is, but he can understand being afraid of something he logically knows can't hurt him. they're pretty good at working each other out of panic attacks because of this
richie
(the things richie says to stan here are things you should never ever say to someone with OCD unless you have their express permission, stan finds it funny and helpful, and as someone with OCD so do i, but many will not, and talking like this could make their mental state worse and is just generally an asshole thing to do!)
on paper richie is an asshole to stan about his OCD, he calls him unreasonable, tells him he makes no sense, he's worrying over nothing, etc.
he frequently makes fun of stan's obsessions, if stan says something he thought because of his OCD richie will repeat it back to him in a Voice
but by some miracle this does wonders for stan
if anyone else was saying this stuff it would make him feel like shit, but because it's richie it's hilarious (not that he shows it)
richie assigning characters to his obsessions has managed to completely discredit some of them, and stan is straight up Not Bothered by some of them anymore because as soon as the thought pops up so does richie's voice and he can't take it seriously
there's the scandalized mother who thinks stan is a horrible person for not appreciating his meals properly or something
there's the conspiracy theorist trying to convince stan curses are real
and there's the high school coach who acts like stan is a one man army and they're going to lose the entire war if stan doesn't fold his sheets properly
stan doesn't want to give richie credit for his improved mental state because the way he did it is ridiculous, but yeah, richie and his voices have definitely helped
beverly
bev is great at Not Talking About It and Being Normal About It
stan will say something extremely concerning (use your imagination, i don't want to provide an example lol), and bev is like "yeah thats fucked up." and then they move on
he never gets the feeling she's brushing him off or anything, she'd definitely Actually Talk About It if he asked, but sometimes he just needs to get the thought out there and then immediately move on
sometimes it is exhausting to actually talk about feelings, sometimes stan just needs to express that he's feeling something, be acknowledged, then move on
"i just thought [insert concerning compulsion he doesn't want to do]" "or we could skip class and build a snowfort before all these other assholes ruin the fresh snow at lunch"
stan never feels judged in the slightest when he's with bev, and it helps free him of some of the judgment in his own mind :)
ben
ben is so so so good at listening, not only is he just the only nice 13 year old stan has ever met, he has one of those faces yknow?
he finds himself telling ben things it took him nearly a decade of friendship to tell bill
ben is clearly confused and concerned, but he never makes stan feel like he's unreasonable
stan usually only tells his friends about his specific obsessions when they've bottled up and are about to explode, or when he's in the midst of a panic attack
but with ben he feels like he can talk about the other stuff that comes with it, the impact his thought processes have had on his life
ben offers suggestions from time to time, not all of them stick, but the ones that do really help stan out
mike
mike finds a way to keep stan from worrying about anything at all
stan could spend all day worrying about something, and then mike shows up and explains some new topic to stan and it's like stan wasn't even stressed in the first place
stan can't even count the number of times mike has gone through an explanation of the history of derry, or what various states are known for, or the tasks mike does at the farm, or the history of some obscure scientific/cultural phenomenon
stan genuinely loves hearing about anything mike wants to talk about, but he also just finds mike to be a really engaging speaker to the point he stops thinking about whatever was bothering him
it is very much a win/win situation
sometimes mike will manage to pull him out of whatever was worrying him and get him to talk about birds and the boy scouts and they always end up having a ton of fun :)
the losers love stan and he loves them <3
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stultifera navis rerun AKA thinking about Iberia hours again because a lot of the Iberians have such fascinating relationships with the concept of home but specifically Thorns and Lumen are eating at my brain. like where do you call home when the place that is your home Just Fucking Hates You? Elysium's rewinding breeze specifically makes a point to hammers home how differently Iberia treats its Liberi and its Aegir
(which is especially interesting since this comes right after a conversation where Purestream commented on how despite Leizi being a high ranking government official, there are still some experiences that are universal for all Yanese people - because the experience of what Iberia itself is like isnt universal for all Iberians)
But all that being said, Thorns also straight up states that Aegir is not his home, and yeah, how could it be? How could a place you've never been to, never truly known, ever be your home? How could it ever feel like a home?
so where do you go when the place that you are from hates your people and the place your people are from is completely unfamiliar and alien to you? Thorns' answer at the end of the conversation with Aya is: my home is where i chose it to be. my home is where there are people I care about and people who care about me
in the complete opposite direction, Lumen's oprec asks: why do you still stay in a place that wants you gone? because the people of Gran Faro like Jordi well enough but when push comes to shove, they will want the only Aegir in town gone
and yet, when Rald the messenger offers him a chance to leave Jordi turns him down and when he's forced to escape Gran Faro after the people there literally try to send him to his death (or worse) at the hands of the Inquisitors he keeps trying to go back because like everyone in stultifera navis, Jordi is clinging to his own dreams of a golden age
but the shape of that dream is unique to every character and for Jordi, his dreams are deeply, inseparably bound to the Eye of Iberia, the legacy his parents left behind
and it's this dream of becoming someone great, of bringing about that golden age that his parents devoted their lives to help create that ties Jordi to this nothing town because despite everything, despite the mistrust of the townsfolk and the hostility of the Inquisition and the danger from the ocean, he simply cannot leave it behind
(or, because i personally dislike the official translation,)
"I just see this place as my home"
so yeah. not sure what overall point i was trying to make here i'm just. deeply in love with these stories about chosing what is and isn't your home, of saying you will not call a place your home because it has given you no reason to or saying you consider a place your home even though it has given you every reason not to. deeply unwell about them <3
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