#couldn’t not make a rainbow edit now could I | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

springalwayscomes · 9 months

Text

Closer: Too Close (I)

Closer Closer: Too Close (Teaser) Next up: Closer: Too Close Masterlist Taglist

Plot: To have each other close is something that you both always wanted, in a way or another. It’s just that… closer may be too close for you to handle.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Domestic, Humor, Friends to Lovers

Wordcount: 47.5k

Content Warning: Dirty talk, swearing, pining, mentions of masturbation, masturbation, praise, cunnilingus, cum eating, unprotected sex, mentions of blowjob, squirting, public sex, fingering, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, love making, creampie

Author’s Note: Hello, here it is!! Honestly I didn’t think I would write a second part to Closer, I felt like the end of it was the best I could give to these two, but it received so much love and when I read it again I couldn’t hold myself back, they just make me want to write more about them. Still, I consider the first part the main one, you can read that without having to read this. I would add though, that these two here just make me want to scream for the bond they have so I hope you’ll like this as well. I didn’t say the time I would publish it to feel a little more relaxed with the editing but you asked me before and I thought I’d make it on time for 1 am KST so sorry if I kept you waiting! I hope you’ll like this, and happy birthday Jungkook! Take this as a little gift💜

P.s. I hate tumblr, I had to split the story in different parts because it was too slow and apparently every post has a limit of 1000 blocks, so here you’ll be able to finish your reading:

Closer: Too Close, it’s all part of the same story!

If you want to be tagged in my taglist to get notified when my other works will come out let me know here, under this post, with a message or an ask. Feel free to talk to me for whatever, I always appreciate your messages!🫶🏻💜

Jungkook wishes you didn’t look so beautiful. So pretty in his arms, all for him to admire as your breaths come out in soft sighs, pillowy lips so ready to be kissed. Having you like this makes his mind spin. Fuck, how lucky he must’ve been in his past life. He wonders if there you met him too, if it was in the same way, if you were the same as now. You must’ve been a nymph, surely. Or a princess, the sun, a rainbow maybe. It’s weird, how in this life you still manage to be all of that for him.

At some point you fell asleep. In his arms, naturally and lovingly, your fingers stopped tracing patterns on his abdomen, your breath got deeper, your eyelashes fluttered shut, you nose nuzzled against his chest and all he could think about was how much he loves you. How you put the stars in his skies, how you make his world spin. And suddenly, he couldn’t sleep. Not with you beside him, your warmth around him after making love to him for the first time. He just can’t, too taken by the sight of you.

So adorable, he scrunches his nose. So pretty. His arms wrap tighter around you, a soft and sweet kiss lays on your head and Jungkook can’t believe he finally gets to do this, have you whole. You love him. Fuck, it feels surreal. You love him, you fucking do. He’s too excited to sleep, too happy. Overwhelmed, would be the right word.

He strokes a strand of your hair behind your ear and a second later you’re murmuring something in your sleep, lips pouty and eyebrows furrowed. He giggles at your cuteness, not really understanding what you’re saying until your fingers dip into the skin of his chest.

«Koo» your voice is grumpy and low and Jungkook holds you tighter until there isn’t any space left.

«Baby» he coos, drunk smile on his face. You’re probably dreaming, still he can’t hold himself back.

«Love you» you murmur.

The silence in the room makes your words louder even though they came out so low. His heart thumps against his rib cage and suddenly he finds it hard to breathe. Your scent takes over him, his hands feel heavier on your skin, eyes lost on your face.

«Are you awake?» he mumbles. Your answer doesn’t come, silence still filling the air and your soft breath accompanying it.

«Please» he whines, it’s soft and gentle and unexpectedly he’s nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck.

«Hhm» your annoyed moan makes him smile on your skin, just right before he leaves a peck on it.

«Please» he stretches the word out, still nuzzling his nose into you.

«Anno- ying» you groan, raspy voice. Jungkook hums as his lips stretch against you, his hands coming to stroke your hair.

«What do you want?» you mumble in your sleep.

«Sorry I woke you» he whispers. You shake your head, sleepy but holding tighter to him.

«What is it?»

He doesn’t know it either.

«Can’t sleep beside you» his answer makes your head shoot up, puffy eyes staring at him and view foggy.

«You want me to go to my bed?» you ask meekly. You wish you didn’t have to ask, it feels so good to sleep in his arms. Tomorrow he has to work though, and sleep is very much needed, so maybe you should go.

«Fuck, no» he shakes his head eagerly, eyes staring right up into yours.

«Why would I want that?»

«You said you-» you yawn «you can’t sleep beside me»

Jungkook scrunches his nose, cuteness overloaded. It makes your senses wake up just to pinch it between your fingers, his lips pouting when you do so.

His hands travel to the back of your legs, they grab your skin lightly and he opens your left one with a soft motion, pushing himself between them for as much as he can from the position. He takes in your scent and hugs you tight, nose brushing on your clavicle.

«Not in that way» he murmurs, a soft dreamy sigh leaving his lips. Your heart clenches in your chest, now you’re even more awake. You love him so much. You wish you could stay like this all day, in bed with his hair tickling your skin and his soft breath fanning your skin.

He hides his face against you, feels the warmth of you in his arms.

«Feeling needy» he whines, words muffled against you and voice weak almost as he’s succumbing to your presence, cheeks reddish. He hides more into you.

«Needy?» you coo. Jungkook nods against you, literally shielding his face from your view. You stroke his hair, kiss the crown of his head.

«You woke me up cause you’re feeling needy?» you smile.

He whines against you, lips pouting again.

«I shouldn’t have» he mumbles, slightly embarrassed. You love it, like this. Getting to see him in this way, in this state, fragile and vulnerable, all for you to take care of. It makes you smile wider.

«Why?» you breathe, your fingers slide down behind his neck. He whines again.

«Don’t make fun of me»

«I’m not» you kiss his head.

«You can do it as much as you want» you smile.

He shakes his head against you.

«You should sleep»

«Then let’s sleep» you fake a yawn, the tender hand that was stroking his skin comes back at your side and Jungkook wails again.

«So annoying» he mumbles. You hold back your laughter, closing your eyes. Silence echoes in the air and for a bunch of seconds he waits for you to burst out in a melodic laugh, but you don’t, so all he can do is groan cutely, finally getting away from his hideout and poking your cheek. The roundness of it when you smile makes him scrunch his nose again, suddenly feeling the need to dive into the space do your neck again. He lays his head just there, eyelashes fluttering on your skin.

«What are you needy for?» you mumble, your hand moving back to its original place. He hums contently, shaking his head.

«Don’t know» he sighs.

«Cuddles?» you coo. You don’t care if you’re going to fall asleep at work tomorrow. You don’t give a shit, not when he’s lying in your hold and it took you so fucking much to realise that what you’re feeling in your chest isn’t just pure affection. You want to scatter love all over him and give him everything he needs, every single thing.

«Mngh… cuddles» he echoes softly, feeling the word and the way it sounds so sweet when his mind links it your face. He nods, a peck on your neck.

«Don’t know what I want-» he gulps «just want you close»

Your leg wraps around his waist, another kiss on his head.

«Feeling overwhelmed» he lets out.

«Overwhelmed?» you massage his shoulders. Jungkook shivers against you and it makes you giggle silently.

«Hhm,» he hums «still not used to this»

You nod. You’re not either. You wish you could keep him in your pocket, take him to work and just feel his presence beside you for the whole day tomorrow. You need time to get used to this, to him being your person, even though he’s always been. You wish you had the whole day, you’d spend it on the couch and at home out of reach of public’s eyes, still getting used to how it feels to wrap your arms around each other with such tenderness and intimacy.

«Me neither baby» you puff. His hand gets to your back, fingers rubbing underneath his shirt on the soft skin. It makes him hold his breath, it’s shaky when it comes out.

«Tighter» he mewls. You squeeze him, his chest against you and his nose deep into your skin, eyes closed as he lingers in the feeling.

«Love you so much» he murmurs.

Jungkook feels so vulnerable, like he could break anytime in your arms, like his heart is out of his chest, thumping and clenching and beating just for you, all for you. He feels exposed, totally frail and friable, even though your arms around him and your kisses on his head are the safest fort.

«I love you» you say back. And god, he doesn’t care if you already said it a bunch of times tonight, if you’ll say it a handful tomorrow and the next day, twenty times the next week and an infinity of them for the others to come, he’ll never get used to it, never.

You kiss his neck, your arms come on his back to relax his muscles. And suddenly, he’s squirming in your hold, shivers on his skin that make him lose his mind, all the love in his chest setting fire to his limbs.

«What is it?» you whisper. Jungkook nuzzles against you desperately, his hands coming down on your asscheeks. He kneads the skin, squeezes it between his fingers, pushes your body more into his.

«Wanna feel you» it’s all he mumbles.

You’re combusting, cheeks already hot and a drunk smile taking over your face, eyes glittering with love. Fuck, you do love him. So much, so deep, so effortlessly, so consumingly. You’re in every cell of his body, screaming and pleading to have you in every possible way. Your hands cup the back of his head, you pull him slightly to make him look at you, his big eyes are moist, glassy with all the intensity of what he’s feeling.

«You make me lose it,» you exhale through your mouth «feel like I’m going to explode from how much I love you»

You see his eyebrows furrow, the emotions in his stare take over him and all he can do is smile in such a way that your mind goes blank; it’s full of love, full of tenderness, adoration, weakness. Like he gives up on himself and just drains into you and you and only you. His hand cups your cheeks, soft and gentle his fingers stroke your skin, his forehead touches against yours as the fingers of his other hand dig into your waist.

«Lose it then,» he whispers «please» totally breathless. Fuck, you do. All you can do is lose it, succumb, melt.

Your lips push against him, your hands slide between your bodies, your digits caress his chest, nails lightly dig into his skin, so soft but firm. Jungkook hisses, his cock twitches and all he manages to do is moan and moan and moan again in your mouth. It makes you wet, desperate just like him.

«Fuck» he whines against your lips, your pads caressing his nipple.

«Love it when you whine like that» you breathe, your lips kissing his neck. He throws his head back, leaving you all the space you need as he shudders with his hands on your thighs.

«So- so desperate» it’s a wail, and you can’t think straight, can’t think properly.

Your tongue licks his clavicle, you take his nipple in your mouth, suck it just enough to make him look back at you, you have the ability to turn him into a puddle without doing anything. Your fingers link around the band of his boxers, pushing them down enough to get a hold of the skin underneath, and you can’t help but squeeze his firm asscheek in your hand, lips leaving kisses on his chest. Jungkook is out of breath already, ruts his cock against you, fully hard and begging to be inside you.

«Clothes- bra, please» he can’t speak, doesn’t even know how to formulate a sentence properly. It makes you giggle against his abs, your eyes falling on his face. His cheeks are flushed, hair in the way, lips swollen from all the kisses you already shared. You’re so impatient that you take off your bra and your panties without even realising it, his boxers too, and a second later you’re straddling him on the bed, your core pushing against the muscle of his thigh and your hands all over him. He cups your breast, pulls you to him and cages his strong arms around you with such delicacy, as if you were made of glass. Your nipples brush against his chest and a deep moan escapes your mouth, his head spins. It’s you, it’s fucking you. The meaning of all this, the reason of everything. You make him breathless, crazy, desperate.

«Can’t-» he breathes hard «can’t even speak»

«It’s okay, baby» you kiss his lips.

He shakes his head, his fingers intertwine with yours and you smile against his lips as he hisses, his cock leaking precum. You feel it twitch against your belly and hell, you’re really going to lose it; seeing him like this, never anyone turned you on so much, this bad. Only him, he’s the only one. The only one that makes you think that you’d be down to do anything, to try anything with.

«Please» he begs. Your hand wraps around him, his half lidded eyes look at you as you guide him into you, the feeling intoxicating. Jungkook throws his head back on the pillow as soon as his cockhead caresses your core, your wetness mixing with his precum as you let him enter, filling you up slowly and so incredibly good.

He finds himself totally absorbed, rapted by the way you make him feel. Not once in his life he felt this way, loved so deeply, craved so much, there was not a single time when he felt the need to surrender to someone in this maddening, sweet and consuming way. It’s just… you. It’s your ways, your motions, your soul, the safeness he’s engulfed in when you’re with him, your love. He wants to succumb even more, get so lost that he can barely breath cause fuck, you’re the essence of everything. There’s no point if it’s not you, no meaning.

«Love, baby- nngh, fuck» he wails. His cheeks are reddish, eyes closed shut and lips open and swollen, eyebrows contracted in pleasure as you fully take him.

Your head spins as you move slowly, his lids open to meet your gaze and he… he never felt so loved. The way you look at him makes his chest heavier, fuller. He’ll never get used to it. His hands roam your body, his touch makes your skin fire up, every inch feels like an eternity, ink marking you of abstract emotions that could never be explained. He cups your breast and opens his legs just enough to feel more comfortable, bending them at his knees against the mattress, his breath fans your skin. Your movements pick up, your hips move more on his and the way his cock fills you up so beautifully makes you moan on top of him, the angle slightly changed from the movement of his legs. Jungkook digs his fingers into your skin, your hand on his chest and the other supporting your weight on the bed, your hair fall at your sides and built up walls to shield you and him from the rest of the world. His eyes mark every inch of skin from your eyes to your lips, they flutter and close and then open again, dark and glittery they look at you with all the fondness and vulnerability he never showed to anyone, whines escaping his mouth and ending with nothing but dull silence and the sound of your wetness.

He pushes you more into him, chest entirely against his, nipples tight to his pecs, the feeling consuming and never enough. His arm wraps around your back again and he links his hand to yours, your full weight now against him without the support of your limb on the bed. Jungkook kisses your neck, palms your asscheek and squeezes the skin, pushes you onto him more. He shivers underneath you, the pleasure of having you so intimately makes him throb inside you with every thrust, already too close to his release, your moans in his ears and your hands travelling behind his shoulder blades. It’s needy and full of vulnerability, hands roaming each other’s bodies just for the need of having you close, closer, to get more from each other than what you’re already giving. To belong more, to love harder.

Everything is perfect, he is perfect. You wish you could have him like this everyday, every second, feel him this close forever. Jungkook’s moans vibrate against your skin, both of his hands on your ass as he moves his hips upwards meeting your movements. The pleasure is too much, it’s too good.

Your head falls on his chest as you stop your motions, he keeps you in place with his hands on your asscheeks, cock rutting inside you slightly faster but still so fucking sweet and alluring. Your chest is bursting, heart beating so loud that you hear it in your ears, body on fire with the warmth of him, sweats mixing together.

«Tell- tell me you love me» he whispers, a kiss lays on the crown of your head as your head is still lingering on his chest. You nod against him, kiss the ripples of the muscles between his pecs.

«Love you, I love you» you moan. His breath seems to get even heavier, your walls pulsate around him and they make his cock feel even bigger inside you, the fullness too good to be real.

«Love you, love every- oh my god, Jungkook» your whine makes him leak even more precum, your juices together are so slippery that the sounds in the room are totally filthy and unfiltered.

«Love everything about you, every cell of you. Love you, love you» you breathe. Jungkook is on the edge, your words light up a fire that doesn’t seem to simmer down, the taste of his orgasm already hovers over him and your skin under his fingers burns, the fullness of his hands with your flesh makes him feel the luckiest man in the world.

«Baby, fuck» he moan, his head falling backwards on the pillows. You raise yours, look at him to take in the expanse of his neck, eyes glued to your love.

«When you- nngh» he shudders under you, face contracted in bliss, «when you sp-speak like tha-ath» he whines.

You shake, you’re not really sure if it’s because of the pleasure or because of how he looks, how he sounds. He ruins you, in every way possible. He ruins you with his whines, with how much he loves you so deeply and profoundly, with all of him; you’re so fucking in love that you can’t hold it back and all you want to do is explode and fucking let him know; that you’re sorry, cause he hurt so much, cause you made him worry, that you didn’t realise sooner. That you love him, so much you can’t put it into words.

«I love you» you kiss the side of his neck, lips tracing a wet path until you get to his jaw, his chin, the mole under his lips. You don’t kiss them though, stay on them as you speak and breathe hard, moan on top of him as you lips brush against his: «Love you so much I can’t hold it. Wanna have you all for me, only me. Want you every night, every day»

Jungkook is in a haze, his fingers dig deeper into your skin until he realises that he wants to feel more of you, so they travel on your back, one rests there and the other cups your cheek, his eyes stare at your face trying as much as he can to keep them open. You’re so beautiful, look so ethereal, so angelic.

«I want to have all of you. Wanna be your safe place, wanna be yours. Forever, never want this to end» you shiver under his gaze. And fuck, all he can do is kiss you, so deep and passionate that you both feel like you’re about to combust together. It’s too much, for the both of you. Too good, too deep, too beautiful.

«Never wanna lose this» you breathe. Jungkook nods eagerly, he wishes he could say that yes, fuck he’d follow you in another life too, the next one and the next one afterwards, the one before this if he could go back to it. In every single one, every single version of you, every fucking time.

«Not- not gonna hap-pen» he stumbles on his words, lips speaking against you in slow movements too taken aback from how good it feels.

«Loved you- for so long, baby. Not- not gonna lose this, ever» it’s all he manages to blurt out, your hands are staining his chest and they leave love stains that will be hard to wash away, to ever forget.

«Kiss me, pl- please» he shudders. You lock your lips with his and Jungkook feels totally engulfed, loved all over, totally safe and sound. Your tongues slide with each other, whimpers in your mouth as he moves slowly inside you, eyes stinging even though they are shut, breaths ragged. The way he squeezes every part of you, feels his cock swollen and throbbing against your g-spot, your soft lips so lovingly, your scent all around him. Shit, the things he’d do for you. The love he wants to give, the amount he wants to take.

Your kiss makes him dive deeper, Jungkook is totally lost and exposed, every single part of him displayed for you and totally vulnerable, so ready for you to take over. You could take everything, all of him, every single part. And fuck, you do, and you make him yours. So yours that all he can do is whimper and whine in your mouth, his hips stuttering as he cums inside you, body writhing under yours, your walls squeezing him tight as you come on top of him, legs trembling with aftershocks, the wave of pleasure too much to hold back and too sweet to decline.

He kisses you for long, even while the both of you cum your lips stay on each other, after you come down from your climax, when the feeling is still too sweet to let go. Your arms stay around each other, your skins glide and his cock is still so deep, both of your juices on the base of his length, still moving slowly. It’s so heavenly and blissful that all you want is for him to never let go, stay inside you for as much as he can.

Jungkook keeps you close, eyes shut as you both keep exchanging love, never getting tired. When you smile against his mouth you feel his heart pound underneath you and your digits dig into his chest, his rosy cheeks waiting for you hands to cup them as you slowly part from him. Jungkook looks totally fucked out, but more from the feeling of having each other like this than the act of what you just did itself, and it makes you heart beat even louder. Not even a moment later he’s smiling as gloriously as the morning sky, lips stretching and bunny teeth showing, eyes glittering with emotions that still haven’t been described yet by words, the meaning of them too deep and heavy to just be translated in letters.

Mondays are awful, absolute hell for who gets to spend the weekend relaxing and for those who don’t, sometimes you wonder if it’s the same for who works on Saturday too, maybe it would be better to work and relax on Sunday and have a free day during the week, like Eunji.

Today though, it’s especially worse. Having to leave Jungkook’s arms makes your mood drop even before you’re fully awake, already craving for the evening to come.

You wish you could stay in bed more, lay beside him and watch him sleep, hear his soft breaths and linger in the warmth of his body. He’s still naked, the memories of yesterday night still fresh and replaying in your mind, a drunk love smile invading your features and reassuring you at least a little bit. You were too into each other to even get up and dress for the night, your clothes still on the floor. You didn’t even wash and the thought makes you grimace. You need a shower, absolutely. Not before you dig your lips into his puffy cheeks though.

His hair are all over the place, arms wrapped around you so tight that you find it hard to move, legs intertwined and holding you down, your head at the height of his chest. You move slow and try your best not to wake him up, he snores lightly and you bite your lips to hold back a giggle. He’s so beautiful that you feel like crying, you wish you could paint him suddenly. Your kiss lays on his cheek, the fullness of it makes you scrunch your nose and suddenly he’s writhing underneath you, grumpy and sleepy. You still but kiss him anyway, his arms holding you tighter. He smiles as he realises what’s happening, heart thumbing first thing in the morning.

«Sleep more» he mumbles. His voice is raspy and low and you mentally pin to your mind that you want to spend a full morning with him in bed as soon as you can, possibly on Saturday.

«I have to get ready» you say. Jungkook whines, shaking his head and moving his legs, he creates a cage around you with his right one, throws it over your hip and pulls you against him with the ball of his foot. He shivers when he feels your bare skin against his cock, only now realising that you’re still both naked from last night.

«How much time do we have?» he has his eyes closed, lips pouty as he speaks.

You try to move to get a grab of his phone on his nightstand since yours is still in the clothes on the floor, but he doesn’t seem to get it and only whines at you, wrapping around you tighter.

«Let me check the time» you smile. He seems to loosen up his hold and you manage to pass his shoulder and get his phone from behind him.

«I have to be out in thirty» you nod.

He huffs annoyed, he’s not ready to let go of you yet.

«I’ll take you» he mumbles. You shake your head.

«Sleep some more»

«Please? Let me take you» he whines and pouts and all you can do is deeply breathe in. Too cute.

«Will you make it on time?» you blurt. He beams widely, nodding yes.

«I’ll be on time,» he keeps nodding «are we taking a shower?»

Your eyebrows furrow, his eyes are puffy as he looks at your confused expression.

«We?»

He nods again, a peck on the tip of your nose.

«We didn’t wash last night» he explains.

«We’re showering, but in different bathrooms» you’re already trying to free yourself from him when you speak, Jungkook’s pouty lips in deep contrast with the strength of his body as he keeps you against him.

«Why?» he mewls.

«We don’t have time to shower together» you huff. He shakes his head.

«It’s the same as showering on your own! We’ll be fast, I promise»

«Jungkook, no. Let me get up» his arms loosen around you, giving you the space to free yourself. He knows that tone, very well. It leaves him taken aback though, especially in such a situation when a second before you were smiling at him. He stays still, lets you get out of the bed and looks at you as you stand up, fully naked for his eyes. You pick up your garments, check the notifications on your phone. After you’re done you turn to him, push your knee on the bed and bend towards him. The kiss you leave on his forehead makes his chest burn and fill with happiness again, his hands cupping your cheeks as he makes you still in place. He sits up and kisses your lips, a soft peck that leaves its mark on you for the rest of the day. You smile softly and a second later you’re out of his bedroom.

Your day has been awful, one of those that you want to forget, call it a day and just wake up tomorrow. You had a three hour meeting that never seemed to end, one of your clients was rude and you almost ended up throwing him your notebook, hoping to hit him right in the face. You’re not the kind of person who looses her calm easily, but he spurred you on so much that you lost it for a second, your fist thumping against the table. You had a break of twenty minutes to eat lunch and went back to your office to finish reading the papers of your next client, after waiting for him for thirty minutes you called him just to hear him say that he forgot about the appointment. Thank god it’s over, is all you can think about.

Jungkook called you at lunch, his bubbly tone reassured you as you ate your salad, telling you how is morning went.

Finally, you get out of the building, eyes roaming on the street for your taxi. You sigh relieved when you finally sit inside, the driver already starting the engine to take you to Taehyung’s place. The road is not really long but there’s a little bit of traffic so all you can do is stare outside and listen to the music coming from the radio until your phone rings, Jungkook’s name lights up the screen and your lips stretch in advance as you bring it to your ear.

«Kook» you call.

He beams as he keeps his eyes on the road.

«I’m coming to get you but there’s a bit of traffic. I think I’ll be there in-»

«Oh, you’re coming?» you echo.

«I booked a taxi, I’m on my way already»

This morning he didn’t tell you he would come and pick you up from work, at lunch neither.

«Of course I’m coming» he speaks slowly. His tone is low and he sounds definitely less bright then when you started the call.

«You didn’t tell me» you murmur. Jungkook frowns.

«I thought it was obvious» he mumbles. He’s disappointed but all he can do for now is turn on the left and get back to the main road.

«Are you still going to Taehyung’s?»

«Of course» you nod. You wait for him to say something but silence fills the air and you end up staring outside once more.

«Are you mad?» you shrink in your seat.

Jungkook munches on the inside of his lips, head shaking.

«No,» he mumbles «just disappointed. I wanted to spend some time together before going»

«Oh, I’m sorry» you sigh.

«I didn’t think about it, I just-»

«It’s okay, baby. Don’t worry» he smiles a bit. Your tone sounds low and it’s far from what he wanted for you to sound like when he called.

«Just call me next time» he smiles more.

«I will» you nod.

«I’ll be there in ten minutes I think, is there so much traffic?» you ask. The road that you’re on seems slightly more free than the one before, there are a lot of cars but it’s not too bad, you can still move without having to stop every two minutes.

Jungkook huffs.

«A little. I guess it will take me twenty minutes at least. Are they ordering dinner or cooking?»

«Hoseok told me they want to eat pizza» you inform.

«Can you order for me too?» he looks at the screen almost as if you could see his pouty lips.

«Do you want your usual?»

«Yes,» he nods «I’m so hungry»

«You ate too little at lunch» you scold. Jungkook shrugs as he finally turns around and enters the main road.

«I wasn’t that hungry at lunch»

«I know but you should eat enough to get you to dinner» you sing-song.

«Ugh, so annoying» he sighs, a smile stretching on his face. You shake your head, eyes going back to the street.

«I’m almost there, see you in a bit?»

He nods.

«Yes, I’m on the main road. See you in a bit»

You’re about to close the call when he calls your name again.

«Y/n?»

«Mh?» you hum. He bites on his lower lip, a bubbly feeling making its way in his chest.

«I love you» he hums back, voice soft. It comes out too hard to hold back your smile, cheeks burning.

«I love you too»

Jungkook wishes you didn’t agree to spend your evening like this. All he could think about today was how much he wanted work to end so that he could come and pick you up, go home and spend some time together. Watching a movie, cooking, laying in bed, whatever would have been fine as long as he could’ve basked in you and your presence. When he saw the messages on your group chat after lunch, he didn’t think you would say yes but after twenty minutes, your reply lit up his screen and all he could do was agree too. He didn’t want to stay home alone if he could be with you somewhere else so he didn’t have any choice left. As he stares at his reflection in the elevator though, he doesn’t look as gloomy as it sounds. His cheeks are full, a beam on his face at the thought of the reaction of your friends at the news of what happened, it makes him eager to get out from the doors and knock at the apartment.

Yoongi opens the door, Hyunjoo by his side smiling at the maknae. He takes his shoes off and lets them at the entrance, taking in the sight of the room as he greets his friends.

«Y/n?» he asks to Jimin after Taehyung pats him on the shoulder. His friend points at the kitchen.

«In the kitchen,» he answers «she’s with Eunji»

Jungkook nods, his friend furrows his eyebrows and pouts slightly as he nods, as to say “go and get her”. It makes Jungkook lick his lips, eyes travelling to the door of the kitchen as he shakes his head.

«Don’t think so but-» Eunji stops talking when the door opens, her eyes scanning the intruder and then going back to the counter, she stirs something in the pan without even bowing to him, too used to each others’ presence.

«Aren’t we getting pizza?» Jungkook asks as he comes in. She nods at him, his eyes smiling at you.

«Didn’t feel like eating that much, I ate a lot at lunch» she answers. You chuckle softly.

«Yeah, yeah» you move your head to a beat that only you can hear «Are you beatboxing?» you laugh.

Jungkook bursts out laughing, Eunji seems to understand your joke only after a few seconds.

«Jimin tells me I speak in rhymes a lot these days» she laughs.

«Please don’t get used to it» Jungkook titters at her, stopping in the middle of the room. Eunji shakes her head, focusing on the food and he looks at you with his eyes all smiley and glittery. You find your insides melting and all you can do is smile back, getting a handful of the napkins on the counter and turning around it. You walk towards him, Jungkook is about to open his arms at you but you seem to fasten your pace and a second later you’re passing beside him like he wasn’t there in the first place. He sees you walk out of the kitchen and turn the corner, taking the napkins with you to set the table in the living room.

He stays still for a minute, Eunji humming as she cooks totally unaware of what just happened and of his confused mind. Why would you do that?

«When’s dinner coming?» his friend yells from in front of him. He blinks at the wall, Jin responding from the other room.

«In twenty»

Eunji nods to herself, turning around to Jungkook.

«Can you tell Jimin to come?» she asks. He nods, not really understanding.

«Can’t you yell some more?» he teases. Eunji rolls her eyes at him.

«You’re a good friend, Jungkook» she smiles annoyingly and he just shakes his head, already strolling to the living room to get Jimin. When his friend leaves for the kitchen, he realises you’re nowhere to be seen.

He wanders around the house for a bit, goes to the balcony, peeks into the gym space, turns in the hallway until he stops in front of the bathroom. He stills for a second pondering on what to do, maybe you’re inside?

«Y/n?» he calls. Your hum confirms his thoughts.

«Can I come in?»

A second later the handle lowers and your face shows in front of him, nodding and about to walk out. He grabs your wrist sweetly, eyes meeting yours as he stops you in place. You look taken aback, even more when he guides you inside and shuts the door behind you.

«What are you doing?» you ask. Jungkook shakes his head.

«Did something happen?» he questions munching on the inside of his lips. You shake your head.

«Nothing happened. Why?» you ask back. He pouts in respond.

«You didn’t greet me» he murmurs low. Your smile softens his insides as you get closer to him.

«Poor baby» you mumble sweetly, hand cupping his cheek.

«You wanted a kiss?» you coo.

«Sorry, didn’t want to do it in front of Eunji»

Jungkook’s mouth opens slightly, not really expecting your words. He doesn’t manage to answer back, your lips touch his and all he does is melt into you, the way your petals feel so soft and full, the taste of your lip balm so sweet. It’s slow and lovely, your thumb brushes against his cheek and he turns into a puddle right away, eyelashes fluttering.

«Missed you so much» he whispers against you, your heart clenches.

«I missed you too» your hands reach his nape, you caress his head as he kisses your cheek, giggles erupting from his chest when you tickle a sweet spot behind his ear, his nose scrunching cutely.

«Sorry about before. And the taxi. I really didn’t think-» he pecks your lips.

«It’s all fine. Don’t worry» another peck.

«I wish we stayed home tonight,» another one «wanted to cook you dinner»

«Let’s do it tomorrow?» you ask. Jungkook nods as he lets his arms wrap around your waist, squeezing you to him.

«Wait, did you come because of me?» you giggle. He nods against you, kissing the tip of your nose. You shriek when he unexpectedly grabs you by the back of your thighs, he laughs at your reaction as he places you on the sink, your knees at the sides of his waist and his hands going back to your back.

«Sshh» he chuckles, his forefinger on his lips. You shake your head, his hands cup your face and you find yourself giggling when his lips kiss every inch of your face quickly and endlessly, pecks left on your nose, lips, chin, your cheek, your forehead. Jungkook giggles with you as he does so, just the melody of your laughter is enough to make him feel as light as a feather.

«So pretty» he coos.

«Stop, it’s ticklish» you giggle. He shakes his head, leaving another peck on the tip of your nose. You have to grab him by his cheeks and pull him to you to make him stop, your kiss stilling him in place, totally taken aback. For a second, he doesn’t move, his mind goes back to how worried he was yesterday at lunch when he thought he had lost his best friend. It makes him beam against you when you part and scrunch your nose at him, cutely angry for not responding the kiss. He kisses you right back, your soft and airy giggles fill up the air again as he rubs his nose against yours sharing an eskimo kiss.

«Yes» he blurts out stilling. You raise your eyebrows confused.

«I came because of you. Why did you agree? Couldn’t we stay at home?» he whines.

«Usually we don’t go to places together if we don’t feel like it» you wonder. Jungkook parts a little.

«We don’t. But I thought- after what happened yesterday I thought-» he stutters a bit «we could stay home and- I don’t know» he looks down.

«I wanted to be with you and… don’t know, whatever would’ve been good»

«Oh» you let out. Jungkook doesn’t budge in front of you, eyes back on your face and expression a bit disappointed.

«Baby, I’m really sorry. I suck, sorry» you murmur «I’m sorry about the taxi and before and this too. It’s just- it’s new and- I thought about staying home too and I wanted it a lot but- I don’t know, we didn’t talk about it and when Taehyung asked I just said yes out of habit. I thought you wanted to come, I should’ve-»

«Hey stop, stop» he rubs his nose against yours once more.

«It’s okay» he kisses the tip.

«It just hurts a bit cause I thought that you didn’t want to stay home? Like- of course you would want to spend time with our friends but- after what happened I thought we both wanted to be with each other and- just-»

«I want to. I really, really want to. Really» you nod.

«I thought about you all day long. I had a shitty day and what got me through it was the thought of coming home to you. I wanted to cuddle or just do anything too. I don’t know, when he asked I just- I’m not good at this yet. Like, I don’t think I can balance our relationship yet. I’m used to us being friends and spending time like this, I didn’t think you would mind coming here cause that’s what we usually do, I said yes cause I thought you would want to come. I’m - I’m sorry» your rant comes to an end and you’re out of breath, Jungkook’s lips are fighting a smile as he tries to stay lucid for a second.

«We need to communicate better,» he sighs, the smile taking over him «definitely» he adds.

«I’ll tell you about my plans and you can tell me yours. It’s better, isn’t it?» his forehead touches yours as his arms wrap around you, he pushes himself to you, hugging you tight and never wanting to let go. You hum on his face, slightly nodding for as much as the position allows.

«So, will we do that tomorrow? Stay home?» you mumble.

«If you want to» he breathes. You nod eagerly, parting from him.

«Thanks god, yes I want to. Wanted to stay home today too» you giggle. Jungkook loses his sanity, your essence invades every cell of him and makes them go crazy with affection.

«Do you want to leave?» he chuckles.

«You think we could? I mean- wouldn’t it be weird?»

«Why would it?» he kisses your cheek. You use your feet to bring him closer, wrapping your legs around him and when he looks at you his eyes are full of tenderness.

«They don’t know yet» you shrug.

«We could just be tired. And we could tell them» he whispers, his fingers brush away a hair that’s about to come in the way of your eye. You hold his wrist and stop his movement, the soft kiss that you lay on the back of his hand makes his mind weak and the way you intertwine your fingers with his it’s even worse.

«Do you really want to leave?» you ask. He raises his eyebrows.

«After dinner? We eat and go» he mumbles. It makes you laugh, it’s totally a Jungkook thing to do.

«Never say no to pizza» you joke, his cheeks getting fuller as he stares at you with his big dark eyes.

«I would now, but Tae payed for them. It would be rude»

«I know, I was just joking. When you’re hungry you malfunction, usually» you explain. He blows on your face faking annoyance.

«Let’s go home after we eat» you nod. He pecks your lips happily.

«Great» he chimes, bunny teeth showing from how wide he’s smiling.

«Can I get another kiss?»

You don’t even let him take in your actions, already pulling him to you and placing your lips on his, totally rushed and needy to feel the softness of his petals. He moans against you, your tongue slides inside his mouth and you feel like on the edge of a cliff with your heart in your throat and your senses tingling. You cradle his hair with your fingers, caress his head as you deepen the kiss, eyes closed. Jungkook feels himself getting closer to losing his hold on the world with you fitting so sweetly in his arms. If he thinks he has to let go to go back to the living room all he wants to do is lead you to the front door and get you to his car to take you home and just bask in your presence.

He lingers in the sensation more, not ready to let go yet.

«Baby» he whimpers against you when you slightly dig your teeth in his lower lip.

«I love you» you murmur.

And fuck, it makes him really lose it. His breath gets cut off, jaw clenching as he breathes in deeper. It’s so good when you say it, sounds so beautiful, so melodic. He can’t believe it’s for him, his ears to hear.

«Love you» you repeat, hands on his shoulder blades and nose bumping into his. He smiles with his eyes shut, cheeks staining of a faint shade of red as his mind gets filled with the need of having you close.

«Can- can you… do you want to…» he doesn’t end his sentence, he looks away from you as he munches on his lips nervously. The sudden shift of his behaviour makes you frown in confusion.

«What?» you coo. Jungkook shakes his head.

«Nothing, let’s go out?» he tries. He sees you, narrowing your eyes at him and trying to understand what he’s thinking about, lips contracted in the slightest scowl.

«Love» you call. He shuts his eyes, the nickname still makes him uneasy with the emotions in his chest, all soft and mushy.

«Tell me»

«I…» he licks his lips, «I want you» he murmurs, his eyes meeting yours again. Silence fills the air, his skin burns in worry and embarrassment with the new information he just let out, mind spinning to try and catch the slightest hint of discomfort in your features.

«Now? Here?» you’re taken aback, and Jungkook can hear it loud and clear, of course you would be. It would be better to just go back and wait for the pizza with the others, they’re probably looking for you at this point.

«I’m sorry, let’s just- go back and-»

«Come here» you smile, grabbing him by his hips and pulling him to you. His eyes widen, his body is totally limp as you keep him close.

«What do you want?» you huff happily. He breathes in through his teeth, chest feeling too tight and weary to hold back the maddening beating of his heart.

«Can’t you tell?» he exhales, slightly getting brave and pushing himself between your legs. His cock is half hard, you feel it against your trousers and god, does it do things to you. You wish you would be home already.

«Not really» you bluffer. He scoffs, the air coming out of his nose fans your face.

His hands grab the flesh of your thighs, his cheeks are still painted of a fair shade or red.

«Want you close» he hums. With you, it’s always like this, always the need of being closer. You fill all his senses, all the space, every inch of him until all he can do is crave and yearn and lose himself, trying to keep his mind lucid with little might.

«We’re quite close» you smile. He whines and closes his eyes, so annoying.

«Let’s just go back» he mumbles, skin burning and chest divided in two between giving up on his shyness and just tell you he wants to bury himself deep inside you and feel every inch of your skin and open the door to the outside world.

«Please? I want to hear you say it» you mewl. Your tone makes his inner battle pointless, his digits dig into you.

«Wanna be inside you,» he breathes «feel you so close»

It’s all you need to hear. Your lips touch his, soft petals parting for you without even having to ask for permission, totally giving up on his rationality. You hum in his mouth and smile against him and Jungkook feels himself growing harder already, you do things to him that make him bewildered. How you manage to get him hard just by doing nothing is a mystery that he doesn’t want to answer, not when you don’t mind at least. And you don’t seem to do so, cause your hand is cupping him through his trousers, and fuck, he gets as hard as a rock. The whine that he lets out in your mouth makes you just as desperate as he is, and when he ruts his hips against your hand you know that there’s no going back.

«Please» he begs. Your hands move fast, almost as if you didn’t have time to lose, cause you really don’t have it. Unbuckling his belt and then opening the button and the fly of his jeans, he watches you as your attention shifts on the garment, your lips pouty and focused and eyes fixed on your task, he really believes that he might die just from the sight of you. So beautiful, so pretty, so his. Fucking his. The thought makes him bite his lips harshly, hips stuttering against your hands. You hum a soft titter, let your eyes travel to his.

«Give me a second» you smile, pecking his lips sweetly. He nods with his mind empty, totally entranced by the feeling of your fingers linking around the band of his boxers and pushing the fabric down with his jeans, the cloths follow the curve of his hips without you even having to focus on it too much. They stay midway on his thighs and he’s already grabbing you by the back of your thighs, carefully raising you on the counter.

«Take ‘em off» he huffs. His strength makes you quiver as you unbutton your sailor pants, your heels tracing the back of his legs as you move. He holds back a moan when your hand bumps against his cockhead while you lower your zip, puts you back on the counter after you lower them a bit on your back, the position too uncomfortable to take them off. He helps you lower them on your thighs until they eventually fall on your ankles, the wide cut leg not helpful at all. And god have mercy, fuck, when he sees your panties the grunt that comes out of his throat makes you shiver, the red lace unbearable to his sanity.

«Shit, I love them» he breathes. Your snort makes him giggle lightly and his eyes move from them to your face and then back to the material between your thighs.

«Really?» you coo. He nods fervently, lets his hand slide between your legs to cup your core from your panties, hissing through his teeth at the contact.

«Fuck, yes. I love them. I love you, you’re perfect» his sentences are rushed, he sounds almost childish before he kisses you with need, his lips against you as his other limb comes to the side of you to balance his weight while he slightly pushes you backwards.

«Mine, mine. All mine» he wheezes. There’s the glittery glow of a feeling inside you that squeezes its presence around your clenching heart, heavy but fluttering it makes you nod with all your belief as you feel his fingers push your panties to the side. His thumb brushes against your clit and all you can do is bite your lips and try as much as you can not to moan, your arms wrapping behind his neck. Jungkook smiles, kisses you more.

«Want you, please» you beg. He wouldn’t decline you even in another life and his cock is too hard to even think about it, it’s twitching and leaking precum and all he wants to do is mix it with your juices and make you feel good, feel you close and wrapped around him.

«Please, inside»

«Open your legs a bit» he instructs, eyes soft as he watches you do so. He lays his forehead against yours, holds his cock from the base as he pushes himself between your thighs and guides it to your entrance. His cockhead slides between your pussy lips and he can’t hold back, moans out loud and throws his head back at your softness, your juices covering him. Every time, every fucking time you make him feel helpless. You kiss the column of his neck, lower your hands on his asscheeks, squeeze his skin in your palms.

«We need to be quiet» you whisper. He knows. Fuck, he knows but it’s too much. He doesn’t think he can do it, you’re too perfect, too good to him. He huffs a breath and looks at you, cheeks a bit reddish.

«Sorry, feels too good» he keens. Your beam makes him smile and he gets back to his ministrations with his lips getting bitten by his teeth, eyes on your face that make you want to lose your calm as he repeats to himself that he needs to stay quiet. His cock is heavy, throbbing against you and practically begging for your walls to squeeze him tight and you can’t wait to feel him closer, feel his skin against yours and his breath rough. Even as he digs into you your eyes stay on his face, his pupils into yours.

It’s so saccharine that you feel like all the world is made of stars, of his essence, his comfort. He fills you up so good, the stretch slightly uncomfortable but always so ravishing inside you, you can feel every movement, every throb of him and your walls are so eager that they instantly tighten around him and his brain shuts down.

«Baby, if you do that- I don’t think I… shit, too good» he mewls. You take off one of your heels with the help of the tip of your other shoe, the right one following right after. Your pants slip totally down now without the support of the shoes holding their cloth from underneath, they land in front of Jungkook’s feet and you dig your calves in the back of his legs, too eager to have him closer, your arms on his back make his chest weigh over yours until he’s as linked to you as he can, breasts pressing against him.

«God, shit. I love you» the way he blurts it out makes your breath halt, your heart flutters and shakes at the same time. He watches your lips turning into a beam, your neediness reaching peaks you didn’t think were possible.

He moves inside you, his waist ruts against yours in little movements almost as if to part from the warmth you’re providing him would be a crime, his arms holding you up from behind your back and your shoulder blade. The position is new, the pleasure skyrocketing in such little time that the both of you are panting in quiet breaths in a matter of seconds. Having him so close supporting you as he moves slowly, his eyes on your face as you moan silently, his breath uneven, the pleasure taking over his features, it feels like safeness. Like a shelter from the world, a new pot to grow your roots in, to bloom flowers and plant new seeds, protected and shielded by his arms and the way his fingers dig into your skin and write silent promises that only you and him can read.

«I love you too» you let out. Jungkook kisses you again, he pushes you more towards the edge of the sink with his hands and goes back to properly holding you up, lips brushing against you as he pushes inside you. The new found closeness makes you even more eager, your hands digging deeper into his asscheeks.

«So good, feels so good» you whisper.

«Yeah? Like this? You like it like this?» he puffs out. Your walls engulf him so good that he feels all of his might crumble, his breath ragged as he ruts inside you. You nod breathless, throwing your head back.

Jungkook looks at your face from the mirror and even though he can’t see it all, it makes him ache more, longing for you even though you’re all for him already. It turns him crazy, overwhelmed every time, never enough.

«So good, yes. I love it» you whine under your breath. The sounds are muffled, the only things hearable your breaths and the wet sounds coming from his cock filling you up and his balls slapping against your ass, moans soft and as quiet as possible. Jungkook drowns every second more into you, it can’t be stopped and all he can do is be honest with it and let your love take over him even as he pounds softly into you in the bathroom. Where you are doesn’t change it; what you’re doing, the way he loves you, how much he wishes he could melt into you and mix in every way possible. You test his limits, pull him along, ruin him in every way possible, it’s sweet and consuming and he only wants to have more, his hand warm as he cups your cheek and kisses you deeper, only for you.

«Fuck. Are you really mine? All mine, only for me» he whispers. His words send you on the edge, walls pulsating around him, way too much pleasure filling up every nerve of your body.

«I promise. Only you, Jungkook» you dig your face in the crook of his neck, pressing your lips into his skin and trying to hold back your sounds for as much as you can. His movements make you bounce a little, the air seems to get thicker and heavier and the feeling of being so close pushes you over the edge, the thought of needing each other so desperately that you actually find yourself in this type of situation makes you dizzy and weak, so much that you contract around him and cum in spasms. Your body trembles as he whines out loud not able to hold back, his cum bursting out of his cock as his hand cups the back of your head and fumbles with your hair. The amount of cum he leaks seems to be unstoppable, so much that for a second he fears that it will spill out of you and spoil the sink even while he’s still on his high, his knees wobbly and his chest heavy as he holds you so tight that you feel the beat of his heart against yours.

He stays silent, listens to your breaths uneven and feels the way your walls clench from time to time, his cock buried inside you still half hard. Jungkook doesn’t know what to do with himself and what he’s feeling, these emotions are too much to handle, but all he knows is that the closer he gets the closer he wants to be. So he keeps you close, just like he always did for all these years but with a new intimacy in which you both linger in, totally fragile and exposed for each other. Only when his fingers trace the back of your neck you realise that your cheeks are stained with tears, eyes burning as you open them again.

You love him, you wish there was a better word to describe it but it hasn’t been invented yet, you think there will never be one strong and heavy enough to describe what you feel for this man, your best friend and finally, your lover. You love him so deeply and without conjectures and presumptions, you love him behind words, behind actions, you just love him. So much that it’s hard to control it, you wonder how the hell didn’t you notice, how couldn’t you realise that for all these years this was already there. How is it possible, to be so blind? To have love in your pot, soul, water, roots intertwined and feel support deep in every single part of your leaves but not realise that it’s just because there’s him keeping you up with his.

«Baby» he calls, his hand strokes your back as you sniff, your nose digs into the skin of his neck. Panic takes over him, heart beating loudly and fear filling up his eyes.

«Did I- god, did I hurt you? I’m so- fuck, I didn’t notice, I’m so sor-»

«No» you shake your head slightly, your hands hugging his back tight.

«Nothing happened, I’m sorry» you kiss his skin.

«Just feeling overwhelmed. Keep hugging me?» you snuffle. His heart throbs, arms immediately wrapping tighter around you as the fright in his chest summers down. He breathes in your scent, massages your back, kisses your shoulders and the skin of your neck he manages to reach.

«I got you» he strokes your hair.

«I always got you» he promises. The words make you inhale deeply, your chest is on the verge of exploding but the tears on your cheeks are drying. He keeps you so close that at some point you find it hard to picture you standing to leave the bathroom, craving for his warmth even though you haven’t left it yet.

«I love you» he rustles. You nod.

«I love you too. A fucking lot»

It makes him guffaw and it’s so hearty and free that your heart feels like it’s getting washed and made brand new only to reach a new peak in loving him, more than before.

His chest rumbles against yours, your giggles filling up the air too. You wonder if your friends are waiting for you, asking themselves where the hell did you go, why would you vanish away like that, if they heard anything; still, it’s too good to let go yet. Even when Jungkook places his hands on your shoulders and lightly tugs you to look you in the eyes, even when he brushes a strand away from your face, even if the overwhelming feeling summered down a little, even if he smiles at you and your chest feels lighter.

«What do you feel?» he asks.

«Love» it’s the only thing that comes to your mind.

«I feel love, all over and all inside and it’s overwhelming but so good. I love it, I love you» you rant. His cheeks fill up, cheekbones high and eyes made of stars.

«I feel better,» you let him know «I think we can go?»

«Let’s get cleaned up and eat, wanna cuddle when we go home» he hums. You shake your head yes, Jungkook pecks your lips but doesn’t budge when you rest your hands on his hips.

«Koo, we need to go» you smile amused.

«Sorry, feels good being inside you» he sighs. He guides his cock out of you, takes a good look at your pussy before closing his eyes and inhaling deeply, his chest swells up and you can’t hold back your laughter.

«That good?»

«More than you can imagine» he laughs.

You’re about to jump down from the sink to get a tissue when he stops you by placing his hands at your sides.

«Let me do it?» he quietly chimes. You nod shyly, the action new. Of all the times you had sex, this never happened most probably because after coming down from your highs all you did was lay just a bunch of minutes on his chest, running away the seconds right after cause it was too intimate to stay more. He didn’t get the chance to bask in these moments fully, take care of you in the way he craved for, in the way he wanted. Last night too, you were too spent to even think about washing, when he woke you up at three am feeling needy it was pretty much just the same. But now, now that he gets to do it, it makes your cheeks burn. It’s so intimate and chaste and when he lowers with the paper between his fingers all you can do is look at his expression focused, his lips pouting and eyebrows cocked, his other hand resting on your thigh. The tissue dries your juices and his, he watches as the last drop of his cum leaks out from your entrance and for a moment all he wants to do is wipe it with his finger and lead it to your mouth but he restrains himself and absorbs it with the paper instead.

«Gonna wash you clean when we get home» he hums. You shake your head, feeling slightly tipsy with him.

«Let’s go?» you ask. He raises up, cleans himself with another tissue as best as he can and puts his boxers back in place with his jeans, he does the same with your panties and your sailor pants, helps you zip them up and close the button when you finally stand. When you put your heels back on he lays a kiss on the crown of your head and takes you by the hand, all smiley and as soft as a cloud. He doesn’t expect you to leave his hand when he opens the door of the bathroom.

«Wait a bit?» you coo. He stands still, blinks at your face taken aback. He just nods, and a second later you’re turning around the corner.

Your friends are all over the place, Hyunjoo and Yoongi laughing with Eunji, Jimin and Taehyung drinking on the sofa and apparently not a sight of the food on the table yet.

«Dinner?» you ask. Jin’s eyes widen.

«Yah! Where were you?» he exclaims, patting your shoulder. You shrug.

«Went to the bathroom, my stomach hurt»

«Oh, did you eat well at lunch?»

You’re about to answer him but a second later your attention gets taken by your friend on the couch.

«Jungkookah!» Taehyung yells, eyes on the younger man as he strolls into the living room.

«Where have you been?»

«Bathroom» he simply mumbles. Jin’s eyes widen by your side, lips sealed shut after he licks them and tries to hide a smile. You’re two idiots, could’ve at least make up something before coming out. Nevertheless, he pretends that he didn’t hear anything.

Your cheeks burn and suddenly you want to dig a hole and hide yourself in it.

«The delivery is running late» he informs you. You don’t really know what to do with the information, especially when your eyes meet Jungkook’s and he shies away sitting on the couch and turning to Taehyung.

The ride home is short, the traffic not a burden anymore and the music filling up the car light, your window open and the soft breeze tickles your skin just in the right way. Jungkook looks at you from time to time, a beam lighting up his features. Despite the fact that he felt a little disappointed before when you let go of his hand and acted like nothing happened between you at all for the whole time you were at your friends’ place, he doesn’t talk about it. It’s all new, fresh and you both need time to adjust to each other, he guesses. Especially with other people around. It was enough when you talked in the bathroom before. He just hopes that he will get the chance to show you affection in public too, in general. Being like you were before you faced your feelings for each other is beautiful, it makes him realise that what you have is deeper than what it seems, but he still wishes he could act like the person who loves you.

So for now, he thinks he just wants to face what matters the most; what happens with closed doors, the things only him and you know.

His hand caresses your thigh as he enters the parking lot, a cheeky bunny smile spreads on his lips.

«You still want to cuddle?»

Your answer isn’t one of those that simply are made of words. No, you have to wrap your fist around his heart and make it stop beating, just to make it go crazy when it starts again. You bend over, lips smacking against his cheek loudly, the kiss one of those that usually little kids would give to their parents, playful and childish enough to turn him into a puddle. Jungkook stops the car as he’s about to park, turns around and stares you with his eyes wide open as if you had three heads. The unsettlement in his features slowly changes into realisation and then into mischief, until he huffs and decides to finish his initial ministration. He parks the car, turns down the engine, stays still and silent on his seat. Just as you’re about to open the car door, he squeezes your cheeks with his hand and smacks his lips on yours, his thumb and the rest of his fingers dig into your skin as he keeps his mouth on yours in a never ending peck. At some point your cheeks hurt with his hold and the smile trying to take over your features, until he finally lets go and breathes out the biggest “mwah” you’ve ever heard. You snort at him, make your way out of the car as he stares at you. There are just some things that never change, he thinks.

The whole situation reminds him of when you first started to live together, that time that he was playing on his phone and you came in the way, made him lose the game just because you wanted to make ponytails with his hair, took a photo right after that still lives in your phone and told him he was cute as hell, just to leave him bewildered and alone back on the couch, still with his hair full of pinkish hair ties and his heart pounding for the compliment, the words game over on his screen perfect for describing the situation.

«Are you coming?» you knock on his window. He wonders when will you stop looking this cute as hell, but he guesses that all he has to do is give up and fall in love with you every second more.

Loving Jungkook comes naturally. It’s always been inside you, from the moment you met him to the moment that you realised it, in every move and action. It’s just, it’s still new. It’s fresh, and it’s weird to finally face it and bare your emotions, it’s thrilling and the rush in your veins every time you meet his eyes makes your breath stop. It’s beautiful, but it’s a bit frightening too.

You love him, god if you do. You love him with every cell of your body, you love every single fiber of him, every inch of skin, every breathtaking flaw and every curve of his soul. Getting used to it though, it’s a total different thing. He’s still your best friend, the one that you grew up with in all these years, the one that you used to tease and argue with, probably the person that you got mad with more than anyone else and the safe place that always got you in every situation, the one that reassured you when things were hard, that hugged you when some nights were too hard to bare on your own.

And for some reason, it’s scary. Not in a dreadful way, it’s not your feelings, it’s just… you guess it’s just the whole situation. Getting to realise that now he has that space in you, that hold on your heart, that space in your life.

«Are you going to shower?» he beams from the door, locking it shut as you take your shoes off and leave them before the stair in the entrance. You nod, feet already walking mindlessly as he does the same with his shoes.

«Wait for me?» he mumbles, voice low and hopeful. You stop in your trucks, turning to look at him you find him munching on the inside of his lips, a habit that always made your eyes stare a bit too much. He notices, how your shoulders hang low and your eyes look away, crawling to find an escape. It makes him gulp nervously and shake his head slow.

«Nevermind,» he breathes «I’ll shower too, do you want to- cuddle on the couch?»

«Couch» you quietly nod. He does the same, smiling at you to let you know that don’t worry, I’ll wait if that’s what you need.

He doesn’t say it though, and he hopes that the words written in his glittery eyes are enough clear for you to catch them and make them yours. He watches you turn the corner, steps velvety on the floor and the sound of your bedroom door closing.

He knows how upsetting it can be, to face something this big. Not upsetting in a way that makes you want to go back to where you stepped before, at least that was only for him cause he was sure as hell that you didn’t feel the same for him, but upsetting because it’s just a new space, a new realisation. So he knows, he knows that you need a bit of time cause he knows you. He knows that you adjust well in every situation, you’re pretty flexible with yourself most of the time. You adjust just good in new places, new apartments just like when you moved in together, adjust well with new people most of the time, if they’re good people. But this is something else, this is about your relationship, the shift in the air. And even though you feel attraction for each other, love deep and hard, he knows that you need to move at your pace. It was the same when you moved in, adjusting to the house itself and his presence was easy, the process of adjusting to the consequences of it a bit slower. All he can do is show you that he’s still going to be here, with his arms open wide for you and his caring eyes, just like it was before, proving that even though things changed, they really didn’t; there’s still coziness in the air, he’s still the same as before just like you.

He showers, waits for you on the couch, makes sure that you have a bowl full of popcorns on the table and something to drink. When you come into the living room, his face lights up. You look ethereal, with your hair still a bit wet and your eyes full of sparks almost as if the shower you just had brought you back to life, even in your pyjamas you look like the most beautiful woman he ever laid his eyes on.

«Do we have snacks?» you chime. He nods, points at the table. Your beam spurs him on, makes him feel like he just did the best thing ever. And he loves it, totally. His arms open beckoning you to him and when you launch yourself in them all he can do is laugh heartily and wrap them tightly around you.

The night feels blissful with his arms around you, your limbs getting entangled the more time passes. You end up talking through the movie he picked, not really showing that much of interest even though it’s pretty eventful. The way he lets you lay on top of him makes you feel safe and cozy, your back against his chest and his back on the pillow of the sofa, one of his legs bent over yours and his arms keeping you warm.

You end up falling asleep, wake up the day after in your bed, a note on your nightstand.

"You passed out from sleep last night, so I took you to bed. I didn’t know if you wanted to sleep in mine, so I figured it was better to take you to yours. I came in to say good morning but you were sleeping so cutely that I didn’t want to wake you. Aish, why are you so cute?- a laughter bursts out of your chest- I’m going to work, probably will be home around seven. I love you :D"

Good morning, you tell yourself. It’s going to be a beautiful day.

The week passes quickly, work hasn’t been too stressful beside for Monday and all you want to do tonight is come back home and just relax. At lunchtime you’re already wishing you could open the door of your house and just throw yourself on the couch with all your might, but apparently life doesn’t work that way. Your phone lights up, your father’s picture takes up all your screen and something inside you makes your senses tingle as if it was a fifth sense.

«Appa!» you call. His laughter fills up your ears.

«Oh, my baby! Are you eating well these days?» his Busan accent is thick, totally differing from yours now. It was hard to get rid of it when you came to Seoul, it was hard for Jungkook too. You smile widely, a feeling of melancholy invading your chest.

«Yes! Actually too well, appa. I eat too much these days» you chuckle.

«How is eomma doing?»

Your father grunts: «Oh, she’s fine, always looking for something to fight me with! We argued five minutes ago but she’s singing in the kitchen as if nothing happened, I’m the only one upset» he rants.

«What went through my mind when I proposed? Aish, this woman»

His tone makes you laugh, the dynamics have always been like this in your family. Your mother is sweet, caring, but god, is she feisty. Your father is always been the calmer one, the rational one between them, saying sorry when it was needed and talking to her when she wouldn’t listen. Her personality is a lot to handle, but if you manage to find your way with her she will give you your world and even the things she doesn’t have.

«Why did you fight?» you wonder. He huffs annoyed.

«Nothing big! I forgot the light on in the living room when I went to pee!» he laughs at the silly argument.

«She scolded me for fifteen minutes!»

«God, she’s something else» you chuckle.

Your father makes noises of agreement, hums at your words and laughs at the high note coming from the corner of the kitchen, your mother definitely isn’t a singer.

«Do you want to come for the weekend? It’s been so long since we spent some time together. I miss you» he sweetens his voice, trying to get into your heart, and here it is, what you sensed before. His invitation makes you smile and nod, even though you’re tired and craving for your couch from this morning. It’s been definitely more than three months since the last time you visited your hometown and your parents. It’s not that you don’t want to go, actually you find yourself being homesick from time to time. It’s just been pretty eventful, with everything that happened. With Jungkook, work being a pain in the ass as always. Plus, a four hours drive isn’t really that appealing, riding the train for that long neither when you know that you will be able to stay just for a little amount of time. You guess you could do that, since you really miss them and work hasn’t been that hectic this week. You have some energy to spare after having a good sleep, even for your mom’s questions.

«Jungkook? How is he? He can come too! We can grill samgyeopsal» he exclaims excited. It’s nothing new, your father is crazy for him and your mom just shows an inch of sanity more, but it’s pretty much just the same, she hides it well. The last time that you visited together was almost eight months ago and every time you went afterwards they asked you why you didn’t bring him with you, so you guess that you could ask him.

«Oh, he’s good. He wouldn’t turn down samgyeopsal. Not in his right mind at least» you joke.

«Ah, great! Your mom started preparing for kimjang, it’s fermenting so we’ll have kimchi too! Aigoo, I’m hungry. Yeobo!» he yells to your mother still with the phone on his ear, grimacing you part from it.

«How much until we eat?»

You hear your mother scolding your father and telling him to help her in the kitchen, calling him lazy ass. It makes you chuckle but silently, knowing that your father will act all lamentable.

«I’m talking to our daughter!» he yells back.

You don’t really understand what’s happening, weird noises making their way though the microphone until your mom’s voice comes in the way.

«Aigoo, my baby! When are you coming to visit?»

«Eomma! Tomorrow I think, I’m going to call you again to let you know» you smile.

«Bring Jungkook!» she chimes. You roll your eyes.

«I’ll talk to him,» you answer «where is dad?»

«Oh, I kicked him in the ass. He has to get up and help me, he’s always sitting on the sofa» she wails.

«I will go cooking, but come tomorrow okay?»

«Yes, eomma» you make sure to nod even though she can’t see you. She says her goodbyes and a second later the call is over, you already picture your dad’s face with a scowl as she looks at him with his phone in her hands.

The air in Busan feels different, more fresh and fragrant, the pollution level is lower and the fine dust is less, so you breathe in and gladly take off your mask. Jungkook stands behind you with his still on his face and a beanie on his head, entirely dressed in black. His hair are getting longer and you can’t help but swoon over him a bit.

When you told him your parents invited you home yesterday, his eyes lit up and he asked to come before you could even tell him they invited him, so it’s to no use to say that when you mentioned samgyeopsal all he did was fist the air and hum already licking his lips. Sometimes you wonder if he likes you more than meat, but you guess that he does, otherwise he would be running inside your parents’ house already at the smell coming out from the open windows.

«Aigoo, they started grilling already» he whines.

«I told them we were about to arrive» you hum. His arm comes around your shoulder, the wide bag he brought hanging from the other side of his body. Jungkook feels happy. He loves your parents just the same as they love him, calls them mom and dad, receives their calls from time to time, when you still used to live in Busan and he would come to your place to hang out he used to have long talks with your dad and laugh about silly things. He feels joyful, ready to spend a good weekend and to enjoy the hometown that he missed so much. His family is in Japan at the moment so it’s crystal clear that your father will keep him occupied for the whole weekend, more than happy to do so. He wondered if he should be sleeping in his parent’s house yesterday but when you answered him no as if it was obvious he felt even more cheerful. You wouldn’t say that your parents are wealthy because they aren’t, but the house is big and has four bedrooms, the price was extremely low when they bought it, plus he used to sleep here practically two to three times a week when you were younger, you know that your parents don’t mind it at all.

«My baby!» your dad’s face peeks out of the window and he yells from the kitchen with his eyes full of excitement. A bunch of seconds later he’s opening the front door and running towards you.

«Aigoo, my daughter is here!»

«Appa, don’t scream!» you laugh as he engulfs you in one of his bear hugs. Jungkook lets go of his hold on you and watches the scene in front of him, a new wave of happiness invading his body. He bows politely to your father when he parts from you, the older man laughing at him and wrapping his arms tightly around his figure. He stays there, with his face on his shoulder and his hand on his back, gladly taking his affection and hugging him back, eyes sparkly and cheeks full.

«I want a hug too!» your mother comes out, hair disheveled and a kitchen apron covering her cloths. She runs to you with all her speed, for a second you fear that she’ll stumble and fall over but her body is still strong and she’s still the baddest of the baddest. She pulls you to her and you feel at home, suddenly relaxed. She might be the most annoying person on the planet, but she’s the person that loves you more too.

You guess that after you comes Jungkook, cause as soon as she hears his laughter she pats his shoulder and pulls him to her with you still in her arms, your dad having to let go of him, she squeezes the both of you and kisses both of your heads.

«Aigoo, I missed my babies so much» she wails. Jungkook snorts and let’s her do her thing, his eyes meeting yours as he smiles tenderly.

«How are your parents? Your mother called me yesterday, Japan must be fun!»

«Oh, they’re having fun» he giggles.

When you go in you don’t spend time in strolling around and place your bags in your room. The forniture is still the same, the space not that big but not small either, a poster of your favorite girl group when you were younger on the door of your wardrobe. Jungkook stops in front of the door with his bag hanging down from his hip, takes a look around with a dreamy smile on his lips.

«I missed here so much» he munches on the inside of his cheek.

«How are you feeling?»

His hand reaches your shoulder, he squeezes it as he stands by your side.

«Good,» you hum «happy»

He doesn’t expect you to do anything, but when you wrap your arms around his waist and look at him from down his happiness reaches its peak and he finds himself spiraling.

«Are you?»

Fuck, yes he is. A lot, a fucking lot. He missed his hometown, missed your parents, missed the warmth of the air, missed your memories together. To be here, when your relationship took such a turn makes him look back to everything, from the moment he met you and laid his eyes on you to where you are now, when you moved in together, when you used to spend your afternoons in your bedroom just because you wanted to hang out with each other, when you used to sing your hearts out to his favorite songs, every time you would end up staying up until three in the morning watching animations, all the crazy things you did together and the softest ones too.

«Do you remember when I came in from the window cause your parents were sleeping?» he laughs already at the thought.

«You’re so dumb, woke ‘em up anyway» you shake your head.

«They even got mad. They said it looked like you were trying to rob the house»

«Your dad got mad. He probably thought we were going to sleep together»

«It doesn’t make sense, you were here every day» you chuckle.

«They never let me sleep in your room at night» he mumbles smiley.

«It would’ve happened anyway if that was the case» you squeeze his hip.

«Isn’t it?» he faces you with a cheeky grin.

«It wasn’t,» you shake your head and poke your tongue out at him «and we’re not just sleeping together»

«We aren’t,» he smiles more «you love me» he huffs with his eyes in a haze. The feeling you see in them it’s perfectly clear and it’s the same that makes you soften your stance.

«Tell me» he hums, voice velvety.

You seal your lips shut just to tease him and he thumps his foot on the floor, eyebrows furrowing and lips pushed forward in a pout.

«Please?»

«I love you»

«You- oh?» he really didn’t expect for you to give up so easily.

«I do,» you smack his ass «now get your bags here»

«Oh?» he doesn’t know if he should be teasing you for the way your hands still lingers on his ass or ask you what you’re talking about.

«Your bags,» you puff out «you left the other one in the car»

«Yes- yes, here like- here? In your room?»

«If you want to?» you smile.

«Do I- like, sleep here? With you?» he asks.

This week you didn’t sleep together, he gave you the space you needed to get used to the new situation, you cuddled in his bed more than once, stayed on the couch until late, but you didn’t spend the night in his bed and neither did he in yours.

«If you want it too» you mumble. He blinks, face empty. And then he beams, his bunny teeth showing and punching you right in the guts.

«But- your parents» he murmurs. He doesn’t know if he should bring this up to remind you that you’re not home or if it would be better to just stay silent and play coy.

«They don’t need to know» you hug him tighter, cheek pressed to his hard chest and eyes on him, looking like the cutest being that ever walked on Earth. If looks could kill, god, this would be around one of his thousandths of lives.

«I want to sleep with you, for tonight» you plead.

Jungkook pucks his lips.

«I’ll get the bag» he peals, eyebrows up and jaw cocked up, looking satisfied and so endearingly exuberant.

Samgyeopsal is life, that’s one of the few things that both you and Jungkook agree on. Especially when it’s soft and almost melts in your mouth, still hot and accompanied by kimchi and wrapped in a leaf of lettuce. It makes the man beside you moan and close his eyes, pretty much the same as your reaction as you dip another piece into the sauce.

«Are you feeding my daughter? She looks skinnier» your dad munches on his food, cheeks full and eyes on Jungkook.

«Appa, I’m eating well, don’t worry» you shake your head.

«And I’m able to feed myself on my own»

The man snorts at your attitude, your mom nodding.

«I know, but it’s nice to know that there’s someone who takes care of you»

Jungkook shifts in his seat, his smile stretching.

«I take good care of her» he nods proudly.

«We ate bibimbap yesterday»

«I cooked that» you chip in, chopstick pointing at him.

«I helped you,» he scoffs «and I make sure you have food when you come home later than me»

«He does,» you nod «don’t worry» you look at your dad. The man gulps down, his eyes move from Jungkook’s to yours and he tilts his head slightly, a second later he’s eating again.

«Are you going out for dinner? Or do you want me to cook something in particular?» your mom butts in as she grabs another piece of meat and puts it in your dish.

«Oh, we don’t know yet,» you look at Jungkook «do you want to go out?»

«Do you?» he asks back.

«Not really»

«We can help her cook then» he tilts his head towards the woman sitting in front of you. She scoffs, grabbing the meat and wrapping it in the lettuce, her hand directed to Jungkook’s face. He stays still with his eyebrows cooked and his eyes a little bigger than usual, tongue between his teeth and lips closed.

«Open up» she orders.

«Eomma!» you scold. The woman snorts through her teeth, the sound guttural and lamenting.

«I used to feed him when he was younger, can’t I do it now?» she wails.

«Yah, you’re really something. Leave him alone!» your father lightly smacks her forearm and her eyes shoot bullets to his face.

«I-» Jungkook isn’t even able to start his sentence, your mom bickers back to your father.

«I’m just feeding him!»

«Should I come in in a bit?» Jungkook whispers at your ear as you’re about to leave the living room. Your parents are happily playing cards on the carpet, no silly little squabble in sight until now, the air is light and the sky is dark. You guess that yes, it would be better, so you nod at him. He fights the urge to kiss your cheek, just smiles at you as you get up from the couch.

«I’m feeling sleepy, I think I’ll go to bed» you announce. Your mother hums at you, lifting her hand in the air in a muted request to wait as she chooses her next move with the cards. Your father looks at Jungkook.

«Do you want to play?» he asks. The man on the sofa declines quietly, a polite smile on his face.

«I’m a bit tired too, actually» he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

«I’ll pass for tonight. Tomorrow?»

Your mom puts her card down, your father’s face lights up as he throws his card on the table.

«I won!» he cheers as he laughs at your mother’s face. She snorts and let’s her head fall backwards, her mouth shut.

«I’m going to win tomorrow too, get ready Jungkook!»

«We’ll see» he titters.

«Eomma, I’m going» you remind her. The woman gets up with her face still annoyed by your dad’s victory, she stumbles on her legs as she’s been sitting on the ground for almost three hours now, wrapping her arms around you and kissing your cheek. Jungkook feels his chest swell up with happiness, the feeling bittersweet. The scene reminds him of your younger selves, your parents saying goodbye when you left for Seoul.

«Sleep well» she chimes, patting you on your back. Your father comes too, gives you a peck on the crown of your head.

«See you tomorrow» he smiles. You wait for them to part from you before you make your way out of the living room, Jungkook’s eyes following you out of the corner.

He waits for you to close the door of your bedroom, gets himself a glass of water, watches your parents start another round with their game, listens to your father’s story about that time that a taxi driver stole him 20,000 won. Then, he decides to stand up.

«I’ll go too» he says. Your father nods, gets up again to pat his shoulder.

«I’ll kick your ass tomorrow» he promises. The bunny smile on Jungkook’s lips makes him pinch his cheek as he always did when he was younger, endeared by his cuteness even though he’s a full grown up man now, then goes back to his sit.

«Sleep well» your mom wishes. He nods and waves goodbye.

The path to your bedroom is silent, it only lasts a bunch of seconds but by the time he knocks at your door he’s all smiley and excited in a way that makes his heart flutter with peace and happiness. You tell him to come in, voice muffled. The handle lowers and his eyes peek into the dark room, the light on your nightstand the only thing keeping the ambience clear at least a bit, your lashes flutter from under the sheets and all he wants to do is throw himself into your bed and dive into your arms until tomorrow comes.

«You’re sleepy for real?» he giggles. You watch him get closer and stand by the bed, he stares down at you and you reach your arms out to him. His smile is contagious, a harmonious laughter erupting from his chest as he kneels by the side of the bed, figure bent over to hide into the softness of the sheets and your arms around him.

«I have to wash,» he keens «will you wait up? Don’t wanna sleep so soon when I’m in bed with you» he mumbles against you. You let out a content sigh.

«Go shower,» you smack his ass lightly «I’ll wait up. Be fast, please?»

He pecks your lips quickly, his excitement throbbing out of every pore of his body. The gesture surprises you, your lips were far from his for the whole day even though you spent all the time together, so you feel a little love drunk.

«Thank you»

He low-spiritedly parts from you, getting back on his feet and strolling out of your bedroom to go and take a shower.

When he comes back ten minutes later his hair are a little dump, his skin glowing by the nightlight and you find your breath getting stuck in your chest. You lift the sheets, invite him in without saying a word. Jungkook lays on his side, looks at you silently as if you were the most beautiful star painting the sky tonight.

«How are you feeling?» he lowly asks. You dig your head deeper into your pillow.

«Good, I told you» you hum, getting closer to the warmth of his body. His heart sinks in his rib cage, arms hitching to hold you just as you wrap yours around his torso. Jungkook takes in the way you smell, how the perfume of your body wash is so sweet but not too strong, the way your hair seem to dance on your pillow cause the reflection of the light changes when he shifts to get closer to you.

«I feel good too» he sighs happily.

«It feels so good to be here like this» his fingertips trace the curve of your hip, tickling your skin and making you shiver just the slightest. You hide your face in his chest.

«Did you miss it a lot?» you question.

«Sometimes,» he shrugs «we have a lot of memories here»

«We do,» you nod, look at him when one of them strikes through your mind «do you remember when you tried to prank me? You scared the shit out of me»

His laughter is so loud that you’re afraid he’s going to be heard by your parents, head falling back on the pillow and eyes shut.

«That was so funny. The face you made when you realised it was me, I-»

«I swear if you ever do that again I’m going to punch you» you shake your head, but the memory is sweet inside you.

You were tired, worn out from your first days at your first job, sad cause you felt like you didn’t measure up. The dumbass decided to help you with your mood but apparently he and Jimin where too into it and didn’t think about the consequences of their actions. They came in before you thanks to your parents loving Jungkook way too much and waited for you in your bedroom with the lights off for almost thirty minutes. Jimin ended up falling asleep on the bed and Jungkook decided that it was funny enough to steal the gochujang from your kitchen and soul up Jimin’s shirt with it. When you came in Jungkook was sitting behind the door, a very Jungkook thing to do, and when you turned on the light you screamed so loud that your throat was sore the next day, scared to death of the red stain on your friend’s shirt. Jimin woke up, jumped on the bed, Jungkook reveling his presence only in that moment when his laughter was too much to contain. The moment in which you though you had a dead body on your bed transformed into arguing in a matter of seconds, and when you realised that Jimin wasn’t part of it you ended up getting mad at Jungkook, until you realised that he drew a penis on his forehead with the gochujang sauce. You have no freaking idea of how he did that, but somehow it was still there on his forehead and he didn’t know.

«Some things work only once,» he laughs harder «Jimin’s face was so fucking hilarious the whole time»

«When he realised it got even worse» you can still picture it clearly, how he opened the camera of his phone and widened his eyes just to start laughing with you, his finger coming right up on his skin to get a taste of the sauce. Your Kook shakes his head, kisses your forehead.

«You pranked me too» he murmurs.

«My pranks weren’t that dreadful»

«No, cause you preferred sticking notes to my ass» he snorts.

«I only did that once,» you raise your forefinger to his face to show him «and it was one note»

«I walked around the school with it» he whines. Citing what your sixteen years old version of you wrote; “I have a cute bum, now stop looking, thanks :D”.

«I know baby, I’m sorry. It was so funny though»

The warmth of his body makes you shrink into the mattress. Your eyes close while you dwell into it, the soft pads of his fingers stroking your back, his even breath, the sound of his voice when he speaks, the melody of your heart beating peacefully and steady. Jungkook notices the way your eyelashes flutter, the way you let yourself smile and hug him tighter.

«Baby» he hums. Silence fills the air for a moment or so, you wait for him to speak but shift in his hold, face looking up at his. He’s smiling tenderly, a little dimple on his cheek accompanies his lopsided beam.

«How are you feeling? Like- I know that you’re happy, but I mean- how? With us?»

The question makes you stare at him for a bit too much. Your thoughts intertwine and your lips crave for his to make sure that the answer is totally clear, but instead you squeeze him tighter.

«What do you mean?»

Jungkook caresses your cheek as he speaks, his voice a bit raspy: «It can be hard- to fit into this… new thing? Like, getting to what we had before to this»

«I’m doing fine,» you smile «sometimes it’s odd, not in a bad way though. It’s just, I feel overwhelmed and… it’s weird to get to have you in this way cause it wasn’t like this for all these years. But I love you»

Kook munches on his lips, big doe eyes diving in yours as he takes in your answer, the roundness of his cheeks distracts you just for a second because you want to pinch them.

«I feel overwhelmed too,» he squeezes your side «you can’t get used to that» he beams again. It’s like he restores the light to the room, so bright and beautiful that the night sky looks like nothing compared, dazzling.

«Please don’t get used to that,» his tone is pleading «it’s beautiful and I love it when you feel like that. Makes me feel so loved and I just want to wrap my arms around you and never let go»

Your heart throbs, and you think that you couldn’t even if you tried with all your might. It’s just him, his light, his night skies, his bunny teeth, his big shoulders, the way his skin feels on top of yours, how he has a hold on you that could never stop swivelling, his soul. It’s everything about him and nothing at all that makes you love him with every part of you and even though it’s new and sometimes you don’t know how to face it, it’s him and him and him only that you crave for deep at night, his arms around you and his cute lips when he speaks.

«I’m not trying to get used to that,» you hide your face into his neck, taking in the fragrance of his body wash and how sweet it is «I’m just- I’m getting used to being more, not your best friend»

Your words make him pout. He guides his fingers to you, raises your chin and his pupils stare deep into yours.

«You’re still my best friend» he mumbles.

«You will always be, but what we have now…»

«I know» there’s no need for him to explain.

«Of course I am. But there’s this too and sometimes I don’t know how to handle it»

Jungkook nods. He loves what you’re doing, how you’re communicating to him, the atmosphere of intimacy in the air. He lets go of you to prop up on his forearm, his hand supporting his face as he stares back down at your eyes, you let yourself lay on your back limp under his sight. His fingers caress the curve of your hip and Jungkook swears that not other woman in his entire lifetime as ever made him this weak, not just physically, emotionally too; so bare, so frail, so vulnerable and ready to take it all at the same time.

«Do you think that it’s going better?» he whispers, totally devoted. You shrink more into the mattress, his eyes feel like reassuring you more than looking for an answer.

«I think it is,» you nod «just slightly»

He brushes his nose against yours, kissing the tip afterwards.

«Can I do something? Like- to help you?» he stumbles on his words. It’s weird cause a part of him just wishes you could let go and take all he has to give, everything and more and just bask in it, but he knows you. He knows that you have to find your new balance before taking it, he‘s aware that what will come after will be even more hard to handle, for him especially… cause once you’ll find your space he will lose his mind with how much every part of you belongs to him, how much of yourself you’ll give without taking back. It’s always been like this, it was the same even at the beginning of your friendship.

«No, just-» you lick your lips «just sleep with me tonight? I want you close»

He can’t hold back from kissing your forehead, kiss the vulnerability in your voice away. His fist lifts the covers as he looks at you and smiles, a strand of hair comes in the way of his eyes.

«Come here» he whispers, moving his other hand to pull you closer from your hip. You take in a deep breath, dawdle in the feeling of his fingers as he wraps his arm around you like a few minutes ago, keeps you close until there’s no space left.

He watches your side profile, admires the curve of your nose and the length of your lashes, the pillowy swell of your lips until he lets himself down on the cushion and his other arm comes around you too, his face in the crook of your neck and his breath on your skin. He hides from the world and just focuses on you, makes sure you feel how much he loves you, how much of him is yours. The soft pecks he lays on your neck make your lashes flutter and you push yourself more to his chest, your shoulder digging into his pecs slightly. He raises swiftly from the mattress, pecks your cheek.

«Open your arm?»

You do as he asks, stretching your arm out and waiting for him to lay down again, when he does you cup the back of his neck with it. Jungkook hums happily, decides to lay on your chest. Your breasts are the perfect pillow and the sound of your heartbeat the most beautiful lullaby, and when he hears it beat louder his smile grows even more. You like it, having him laying on you in this way. It’s sweet, caring, it makes you feel like you’re the one who’s giving love and protection to him, shelter from the world even though you both know that there’s not an ending part that isn’t receiving and giving. Your arm wraps around his back, Jungkook snuggles into you and kisses your clavicle, his leg comes over yours to intertwine them and his fingers caress your stomach as he closes his eyes.

It’s odd, how waking up next to him makes your mood shift from happy to helplessly in love to horny as hell. This man, fuck the things he does to you. You think that it’s not even possible to feel this attracted to someone, scientifically. And this time it’s not your period, hell no, you know it for sure. It’s just Jungkook and his fucking body and the way you love him so desperately. His tattoos coming out from the short sleeve of his shirt, the colours mixing with his skin to create the most breathtaking piece of art, the contrast with the other pale arm wrapped around you. At some point tonight he slipped it under your back and you feel sorry for him when he’s going to wake up because it will most probably be sore after having you on top of it for all this time. He’s still sleeping on your chest, snoring lightly from time to time with his lips coming out and the roundness of his cheeks overwhelming, squashed against you, his hair all over the place.

It’s just, you don’t know what it is, but opening your eyes to him first thing in the morning makes your fingers tingle to touch every inch of him. His broad shoulders make you salivate just at the sight. You shift slowly, trying your best to get out from under him without waking him up but his face is peacefully laying on your chest and of course, he would open his eyes at the movement. Jungkook groans and opens and closes his lips a few times, gulping down the saliva he stored in his mouth while sleeping, vision blurry as he moves and tries to take a look at you. Your eyes are already on him, the light in the room is still dim but he’s not used to it and it’s too bright for his sleepy body. All he can do is narrow his eyes, or close them almost, your face hazy but still so pretty.

«What time is it?» he mumbles. His voice is low and raspy and somehow it makes you yearn even more.

You take a look at your phone by the nightstand.

«Seven and ten»

He whines and hides his face back on your chest, nose digging in the hill of your breast. You shift under him, his arms wrap tighter around you and suddenly your legs are opening and you’re pushing your hips against his thigh. Jungkook’s eyes open, puffy and still sleepy but definitely interested in your current mood.

«What was that?» he grins, first thing in the morning. You don’t know what’s gotten into you, your cheeks burn but all you really want to say is just, fuck it. Instead, you just look away. He scoffs and decides to level himself on his forearm by your side, squeezes your cheeks between his thumb and his fingers to gain your attention.

«Love» he calls. Your heart makes a somersault, your breath stops coming out.

You whine under him for the hold he has on you with just a single word, his smile grows bigger.

«What was that?» he asks again, voice soft and airy, a little amused.

«Nothing» you mumble. Jungkook shakes his head, he lays his face back on your body, this time in the crook of your neck. A sweet kiss, his breath on your skin, his eyelashes fluttering against you, his fingers squeezing your hip.

«Good morning» he mumbles happy.

«Fuck it,» you huff out «Kook, I’m-» it’s so embarrassing to say out loud «I’m feeling horny»

Jungkook breaks out in a giggle, so soft and cute that you want to hide from the world and listen to it forever, the contrast too deep with what you just revealed. He kisses your neck again but his lips are stretched and they don’t quite connect too well with your skin.

«Horny?» he echoes.

«Don’t make me say it again,» you whine «it’s so embarrassing»

«It’s not,» he sweetly caresses your hair «why?»

«It’s just… don’t know, I’m not used to tell you this type of stuff» he watches as you stare at the wall and try as best as you can not to look at him. He pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue, his thigh slowly moves back to where it was and when you feel the muscle slightly push against you you wish you could just combust.

«Get used to it,» he mutters with a big beam stretching on his face «cause I love hearing it»

«It’s embarrassing» you mewl and cover your eyes with your hand. Jungkook shakes his head, lowers his lips to the side of your ear.

«It’s sexy,» he breathes «did I do that? Did I turn you on?»

Just the thought makes his cock hard in his boxers.

«You-» you gulp «yes»

«Did I? What did I do?» he licks his lips, your hand moves away and your scoop the confidence to look at him just to find him gazing at you already.

«Nothing, just… you» you whisper cause you’re not sure that your voice is going to work right now. You see his shoulder swell as he breathes in deep, telling himself to just don’t lose his mind, the way you make him feel is just… fuck, there’s no word to describe it.

«Just me?» he smiles, amused. Your little nod makes him clench his jaw. A second later, his lips kiss yours and it’s so fucking sweet and consuming and intimate, sexy at the same time that your body loses its hold on the world and your arms wrap around his neck. You whine on his mouth, his tongue slides inside and all you can do is surrender and let go, give up and let him consume every still working neuron in your brain.

«Do you… want to do something about it?» he hums. You can’t discern if he’s teasing you or if it’s your mind playing tricks on your embarrassment.

«Don’t tease me» you huff. He kisses your chin.

«I’m not. Not in a bad way at least,» he smiles «I’m just- the thought makes me hard» he breathes. You gulp down harshly at the information.

«Can I take care of you? Just- if you don’t want to-»

«Please, do it» your sigh cuts him off. Jungkook raises his eyebrows, stares at you to make sure that you really mean it. The last time you had sex was a week ago, at Taehyung’s house. You needed space to get used to this, even though you didn’t actually say it he understood it perfectly, and he just wants to make sure that you really mean what you’re saying.

«Are you sure?» he hums. You nod surely, squeeze his hip to make sure he understands.

«Really sure?»

«Sure, Jungkook» you dig your head into the pillow.

«Why?»

«It’s just- I want to make sure that you’re comfortable and don’t feel pressured or… I don’t know. I love you, just. Don’t wanna do something that might-»

«Love, yes. Kook, I want you to take care of me. Please? When I woke up, I don’t know… you where wrapped around me and all I could- all I craved for was your touch. I want this, please?»

His eyes light up. Not because you just told him that you want him, but because you’re showing your vulnerability just for him, your needs, your yearning, your voice is needy and it’s for him to care for and to take care of, for him to respect and adore, worship. And he can’t wait to make you feel good, give you what you want and see you in your bare state. So he kisses you, another time. Deep and sweet, something that says I will take care of you no matter what.

And he does just that, his fingers caress every inch of your skin as they travel down your stomach, he admires the softness and the warmth of you, takes in the way you shiver for him when he reaches your hips, lays little kisses and pecks on every inch of you he manages to grasp, his hair tickle your skin and they make you shrink and shift under him, too excited to stay still.

The covers get pulled down, he takes them with him as he takes his seat between your legs, bum on his calves and eyes back on your face. The smile he forges stops all your thoughts and suddenly you sit up and cup his cheeks in your hands and kiss him so deep that he moans in your mouth, needy and surprised at the same time.

«I know that I’m- I’m slow and it takes time. I’m sorry. I just- I love you so fucking much, I wanna do things right. In the right way. Wanna love you with every part of me and every second of the day, I just need to get used to the new version of us, but fuck, I love it» you rant against him. Jungkook feels drunk, he’s afraid he’s going to fall and fall and fall and never hit the ground cause for god’s sake, the way you love him kills him in such a sweet way that he never wants to experience the way it would feel without it, ever again. It’s addicting, the worst of drugs, the deepest of falls, the most saccharine of candies.

«Don’t say sorry,» he whispers and pecks your lips «I love you. I love you and I want you to feel comfortable in everything you do. I love having you like this, but it’s something that means more. It’s not just feeling horny,» he strokes your cheek lovingly. He hopes that all of his emotions are clear to your eyes as he cups your cheeks and brings you closer to his face again.

«It’s showing it to me. Opening up and knowing that I won’t judge and just stay with you. For whatever, baby. It’s us, like it’s always been. You can show me all of yourself and fuck, I’ll be worshipping every ridge, every fucking shade. Just, let me love you right»

You never felt so fucking entangled with someone. Never. But with Jungkook, your souls are entangled, your limbs, your minds, your fucking hearts, your scents, the way you breathe. Everything melts into the other, every part of his was made to be yours and it was the same for you, cause otherwise it wouldn’t make sense. The way you feel the safest you’ve ever been wouldn’t, the way his fingers tremble slightly before they reach the hem of your shirt to push it upwards, the sound of your maddening heart wouldn’t. It doesn’t beat like it would with your first crush, with the last guy you dated, when you take care of yourself on your own. It beats in a way that you feel it deep in your intestine, in your guts, in every place. It beats sweetly, like a melody, it beats like you’re losing yourself but know that even if you don’t have control over you, his soul is going to keep you protected, loved and cared for.

«Lay down for me?» he whispers. You smile and watch him as you rest on the mattress, he lowers himself and lays down on his chest, his feet hanging out of the bed.

Jungkook hums in front of your core, the shirt you’re wearing is pretty big and long so you didn’t wear the rest of your home made pyjama yesterday night. He hooks his fingers around the band of your panties and you raise your hips up to make it easier for him to remove the garment. He lets it caress your skin, takes it off slowly, without any pressure. His eyes take in every inch of your skin, his digits caress your thighs and your knees in a way that causes your chest to feel heavier as he lets your panties fall on the bed just beside you. When he goes back to your center, his mouth salivates.

«So pretty,» he coos «I love your pussy» and a second later, he’s pushing his lips against your hole, his nose pushing on your clit. You moan out loud before you can do anything about it, his eyes close and you raise your fist to keep your mouth shut. Your parents shouldn’t hear this, at all. You’d die of embarrassment only at the thought.

He gathers your wetness on his tongue, sucks it in his mouth as his hands come to wrap around your thighs, moans on your pussy lowly at the addicting taste.

«So sweet» he mumbles on it.

«Is- the door locked?» you question, you have to at least before you lose your sanity. Jungkook nods on your pussy, the movement makes his nose rub against you and you can’t help but squeeze your thighs around him, it makes him moan and slurp on your wetness even more.

«Locked it when I came in yesterday» he says, kissing your lips.

«Relax for me,» he whispers softly «let me take care of you»

Your hand urgently reaches his on your thigh, Jungkook smiles at you and holds it, your juices glossing his lips.

«Tell me what you want?»

You gulp down, it’s hard to even think straight when he looks at you from between your legs.

«Want your tongue,» you nod «please»

«Where do you want it?» the way he speaks as if he’s willing to give you anything renders you breathless.

«Inside» you breathe. He doesn’t let you ask for it twice.

He sucks on your lips just in the right way, and a second later he’s dipping his tongue in your pussy, eyes on you as the muscle works his magic inside you. He curls it and gatherers your juices again, saves the sweetness for his hungry mouth, gulps some of it down and then enters your hole again. Your hand squeeze his, his finger rub tenderly the back of it to soothe you as he starts fucking his tongue in and out. The muscle wet, controlled, firm but soft. As he moves his face to help himself his nose rubs against your clit again and god, it’s so good. So sweet, so alluring that you can’t hold back from wrapping your legs around his neck.

Jungkook loves it, loves you, loves your pussy so fucking much that he thinks he could come free hands just by licking it, tasting your juices on his tongue, having you like this. His cock is so fucking hard that it hurts, his balls are already tight and they make him grunt on you as he fucks you slowly, the pace always the same, the one that he knows you like. He’s too hungry for you, to feel you, to have you, to cherish and worship every part of you, every single one; every irregular breath, every shiver of pleasure. He wants it to be his, every part of you. He wants you to remember this and wants you to soak your panties with your wetness when the image of him sucking on your core flashes in your mind at work, when you’re laying in bed. He wants it all, wants you to fucking lose it and give yourself to him, wants you to trust him that much.

«Fuck, baby-» he whimpers as he squeezes your thigh «wanna make you lose it. Want you to come so fucking hard»

You shiver under him, the pleasure building up with the pressure on your clit makes you arch your back and dig your head in the pillow, your nerves are on fire. His tongue touches your walls perfectly, strokes them as it goes in and comes back out, the tip reaches deep inside you right where you need him and it’s ecstatic. You whimper and cover your eyes cause looking at him only makes you weaker, bite your lips to hold back any sound. And then for a second, Jungkook stops his ministrations. You don’t even have the strength to peek at him, your body limp on the bed beside from your legs still wrapped around him.

His tongue leaves your center, his nose away from you, you whine at the loss of contact but stop when you hear him grunt, his back lifting with your legs. Your hand moves away, and when you look down and see him getting back on the mattress you get a glimpse of the head of his cock, head red and hungry, so fucking hard. He breathes in deeply and dives in back in your pussy, pressing himself on the mattress. A whimper leaves his mouth and fuck, you can’t hold it back. The thought of him rubbing himself against the mattress while he fucks his tongue inside you makes you crazy, the fact that he feels so needy that he couldn’t wait more, the way you make him so hard that drives him insane.

«Gonna cum» you try to whisper, but you’re voice comes out in a whimper and Jungkook roots his hips harder against the sheets.

«Cum for me? Want you to smother me with your juices,» he moans so sweet that your mind links his voice to the taste of cotton candy, so velvety and light «want your wetness all over my face, fuck- I love it, love your pussy so much. I’d do anything for it, for you baby»

His remarks bring you closer to the edge, the rush in your veins seems closer and closer to its peak, ready to fall down and hit you in the best and worst way possible. Your hand reaches his hair, you fist the strands and Jungkook pushes himself deeper into you, his jaw hurts for how much of his chin is glued to you but he found care less, his breath keeps hitting your clit every time he parts just to dive in again.

«Please» you plead. Jungkook keeps his eyes on you and all his eagerness quiets down for a second. The way you look makes his heart clench, the way you bite your lips and close your eyes, the colour of your cheeks flushed, how you squeeze your legs around him. Love is in every move he makes, it was until now too, fuck if it was, but stopping himself for a second or so, he feels like his heart is going to explode. Not only in a thrilling way, but for how much he loves you. For you and you only, for the soul under him and showing itself in its bare state, for you giving yourself to him completely. He kisses your core, decides that he wants to make it even better, give you more, make you feel more and better. His lips lock around your clit, it’s unexpected and all at once and suddenly you feel like you’re going to cry for the pleasure. His fingers push inside you, two of them hit your g-spot perfectly and he doesn’t take them out, just curls them inside you repeatedly, so good and breataking, his tongue flicks your clit up and down as he keeps sucking on it. He realises the pearl with a pop and opens his lips to lick stripe on it, just on the spot that makes you lose it, but his teeth graze it and suddenly you’re whimpering and shaking and fuck, you’re cuming under him, around him. His mind is full of you, you’re everywhere all at once and all he wants to do is fucking show you how much he loves you. Your legs wrap around him tighter and he strokes your hip to soothe you while you keep him tight to your pussy, body trembling.

He gulps down your wetness, cleans every drop and tastes your sweetness on his tongue, licks it clean until there’s nothing more for him, and even then his tongue comes inside you to get some more. He loves it, he’s fucking addicted to your sweetness, to your juices. Just the flavour makes his dick twitch and throb, balls too tight to hold back any longer. He knows he could cum just by having you like this, he just knows it.

«Koo» you call. He realises a deep breath on you, your thighs still shake around him for how sensitive you are.

«Let me help you» you coo. He licks his lips clean.

«I wanna-» he cuts himself off as he takes a deep breath, voice shaky «I wanna try something»

Your hand strokes his hair as you watch him speak, eyes glued to his face even though your mind is still hazy. He looks totally fucked out, almost as if the one who’s been on the receiving end until now, like you’re doing something to him that can’t be explained, take all of his energy and rush it to his cock, begging to be released.

«What? What do you want?» you whisper. His cheeks colour of a reddish tint, eyes glittery looking away from your face, almost as if it’s too much to say out loud.

«Talk to me?»

Jungkook gives in as soon as your foot digs into his shoulder: «Wanna cum while tasting you on my tongue, I- just by tasting you»

Shit. If that’s what your brain is assuming, oh god.

«You mean…»

«Hands free» he breathes, eyes back into yours. The words dig a hole into your skin and you swear that if your energy wasn’t so drained right now you’d make him do just that and ride his dick afterwards, give him more while he’s sensitive and whimpering until all he can do is cum and break out into his sweet mewls and sighs.

«I can do that, I’m so close, baby. Just-»

«Do it,» you nod «do it for me?»

He hopes that your parents are still sleeping or just busy cause he doesn’t think he can manage to keep his mouth shut. The way you look at him and take in every feature on his face makes him salivate. It’s sexy and it’s such a turn on to think that you make him this crazy that your wetness starts to pool your pussy again and you just want him with his tongue covered in your juices again. Fuck, he wants it too.

«Can I? For real?»

You nod at him, free him of your legs just to sit up and raise his chin with your fingers. Jungkook stays there, with his chest on the mattress, ass naked and cock against the sheets, but the yearning he feels for your kiss in undeniable.

«Why would I say no?» you smile.

«It’s sexy,» your lips brush against him as you speak «of course you can»

«It’s a bit embarrassing, actually» he scoffs.

«It isn’t,» you echo the words he said before to you «makes me crazy. The thought of me turning you on that much that you can- cum like that, fuck. It’s making me wet again»

«Yeah?» he hums on your lips, looking for recognition.

«Yes,» you peck him sweetly «yes, love. Don’t feel embarrassed. I would love it»

Damn, he loves you. He loves you. He just- he can’t even form a proper sentence, he just loves you.

«Do it» you smile and all he can do is hiss through his teeth. He watches as you lay down again, your pussy pink and your wetness dripping to your asshole. Fuck, he can do that, he definitely can. His cock is hurting just at the sight.

«Raise your hips a bit?» you ask. He nods as he shifts on the bed, weighting down on his knees and getting back down on you with his cock standing against his abdomen. Like this, there’s nothing that’s willing to provide him of some pressure, nothing to help himself with, and somehow it makes his cock throb even more cause he knows that you want him to cum just from you. You’re desperate for him as much as he is for you.

He breathes in loudly, closes his eyes as he tastes you again, tongue licking from your asshole to your cunt and sucking on the path where your juices dripped on. The taste is saccharine, the texture creamy, honey like. His cock throbs, twitches as he slurps them and wets his chin, your hands coming back on his hair only make him dip his tongue deep inside you. You’re too sensitive to let the pleasure take over you, but still you don’t move an inch. Jungkook moans and drinks down your juices, totally pussy drunk and in love with you. He feels his cock burn from how much blood is rushing to it, his skin sweating, his balls tightening so much that it makes him lose his mind and stand on the edge, helpless and needy to let go but too restricted by not really knowing how to. Until you push your hips to his face. You push your sweet fucking little pussy on his face and his cock just jerks, his balls suddenly loosen and he thanks the gods in his mind that his mouth his glued against you cause if it wasn’t for it, the noises he makes would probably wake up your neighbours and definitely your parents. His cum bursts out in more spurts, so harshly and so fucking much that he feels himself drained and all he can do is hide deeper into your core until it’s hard for him to breathe too, with his nose pushing against you and his high overpowering every part of him. The sheets get wet, his chest too, your asshole gets painted by a few drops and his heart flutters as he enters a world made of bliss and release, feeling your fingers on his cheeks and then on his neck, caressing it sweetly and reassuring him as he whimpers.

He stays like that for a bunch of seconds, feels his cock throb and lingers in the afterglow of his orgasm, until all he craves for is your arms wrapped around him and your whispers in his ears. He digs his hands on the mattress, lifts himself up with a groan and parts his face from your core, laying down on top of you as best as he can for the way he’s feeling now. You welcome him lovingly, your arms wrap around his bust and you stroke his hair as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck and gathers back his even breath, his heart pounds against your chest and it’s so overwhelming to have him in this state that you just shower him with all you can give. All the love you have, all the affirmations he needs to hear, all the thoughts that pass through your mind. You tell him how much you love him, how much you love when he lets go of himself like this, how you love to see him in this way, how he makes your heart flutter, what you’d be down to give just to make him smile. Jungkook whimpers when you stroke his back and kiss behind his ear, totally limp on your body.

«I- I don’t wanna be- don’t wanna live without you» it’s a spur of the moment, but he feels his words rooted deep inside him, written clearly and with bold capital letters. Your heart gets squeezed in the same way that you squeeze him in your arms.

«Don’t wanna» he mumbles childishly.

«Why are you saying that?» you coo sweetly.

«Just. Just to say it, I feel it» his words are muffled. He hides furthermore into you, arms wrapping around you and passing between your back and the mattress.

«Sometimes I think about it. Just the thought- don’t want it to ever happen» he wails.

«I’m here with you, baby» you kiss his neck, take in the warmth of his skin on your lips.

«I’ve got you. Always»

Going back home means getting back to waking up early and to rush not to be late, to spin around all day when you wish you were still laying in bed doing nothing. This Monday was extremely frustrating especially, after getting a taste of relaxing all day yesterday, coming back to work was hell. You spent your day strolling around a park with Jungkook and your parents, had lunch out in a restaurant, went shopping a little even. You came back to Seoul after dinner and when you arrived it was already late, you fell asleep like a baby and slept all night in your bed. Jungkook cuddled you until you fell asleep and then went back to his bed, not really sure about what you wanted cause you were too tired to even talk about it. When you woke up you felt a little disappointed to not feel him wrapped around you but you didn’t have the time to tell him cause you were already late for work since you didn’t wake up on time. You’re tired and sleepy and all you want to do is go back to your apartment, eat dinner and sleep.

«It’s tomorrow» Yoongi smiles. He and Taehyung came to visit you unexpectedly, but you don’t mind it at all. It’s almost time to go home anyway and your work hasn’t been too much today.

«Of course I’ll come!» you clap your hands excitedly. Hyunjoo and him decided to celebrate their pregnancy officially at Jin’s restaurant, you would never think about turning down their invitation.

«Jin will cook» Taehyung nods as he wraps his arm around your shoulder.

«He said he’ll make something really good»

«Yah, can’t you talk about something else? That’s not what’s important now» you scold him. Your friend raises his chin and lowers his bottom lip, a habit of him that you always found endearing and cute. You squeeze his cheek.

«Of course what’s important is the baby,» he nods «but I’m looking forward to dinner too»

Yoongi shakes his head as he scoffs: «The restaurant will be all for us, he’ll close it for tomorrow night»

«Ah, that makes me hungrier» Taehyung rubs his belly and you push him slightly as you laugh at him. His grip on you grows as he tries not to lose his balance, chuckling loudly.

«Will you be-»

Someone knocks on your door and you cut off your words. Yoongi goes to open it, peeks out from the wood, you expect him to bow politely at whoever it is but a second later he’s opening his arms wide and Jungkook appears in all his beautiful aura. You raise your eyebrows, you were not expecting him here at all, this morning you took your car, he didn’t need to come here to give you a ride.

«Jungkookah!» Taehyung calls out. He leaves your side to hug his younger friend, Jungkook’s eyes meet yours as he lays his head on his shoulder, definitely not understanding what’s happening in your studio.

«Why are you here?» he asks. Yoongi hits his back lightly.

«Can’t we visit her? Why are you here?» he chuckles. Jungkook shakes his head as he parts from Taehyung.

«I came to visit too» he mumbles. He finished work earlier than usual today and he wasn’t in the mood to go back home and wait for you there, so he thought that he could’ve just stopped by and wait for you to finish, steal a kiss or two and stay silent while you worked. Apparently, that’s not going to happen.

«You’re something else,» Yoongi laughs «you were complaining all day about work but now that you’ve finished you’re here»

Jungkook’s cheeks color of a red shade as he looks at you. He talked to Yoongi a lot today, more then usual through texts at least, and here he is revealing them all. Not that he minds, after all there’s nothing wrong in it.

«Didn’t wanna go home yet,» he chuckles «thought I could stay here while you were working but apparently there’s a party I didn’t know about»

You scoff at his words, Taehyung gets back to your side and rubs your hair in the same way you would with a pet or a child, his ministrations make you whine as you try to stop him and laugh at the same time.

«Yah, why don’t you make me do that?» he scolds.

«I asked you sometime ago but you told me I couldn’t. Jungkook can?»

You step on his foot to make him stop messing up your hair, he opens his mouth wide at the sudden burst of anger but laughs even harder.

«He didn’t ask me» you explain. Jungkook shakes his head at the side, slightly giggling.

«Cause you make me do it sometimes» he chirps in. Taehyung closes his fists and finally stops teasing you, eyebrows furrowed and lips contracted in a scowl.

«You’re the worst! How can you do this to me?» he slightly raises his voice.

«Yah, she’s working! Stop that!» Yoongi tries to look as stern as he can but his voice breaks out in a giggle too.

«Next time I ask you you should tell me to come» your friend pats your shoulder.

«Since we’re here, why don’t we eat together?» he goes. Your eyes widen at the request and Taehyung pouts at your reaction.

«Hyunjoo is waiting for me» Yoongi declines, eyes on Jungkook.

«Sorry hyung, but not tonight» he mumbles with a grimace. Taehyung squeezes you to his side.

«Please?» he begs with his voice all soft and pouty. You roll your eyes, he knows well how to get to you with all the years of friendship behind you. Still, you know his ways too.

«Not tonight, Tae. I’m tired. We’ll be together tomorrow»

«But tomorrow we’re all together!» he whines.

«Something chill and calm, when we’re together it’s always chaotic»

«That’s because you’re one of those who makes it chaotic» Jungkook laughs.

«Please?» he goes on, giving a sneaky glance to his younger friend. You look at Jungkook, Taehyung squeezes you so tight that you almost feel suffocated.

«These two are the worst. Let’s do it us two. Let’s go eat sushi, it’s on me»

Taehyung is like this. Physical and endearing, your relationship has always been on the soft side, more clingy to what it’s like with the others. You’re used to it and it’s like this for you too but one of the peaks about it is that you can never say no to him, not when he pouts and asks so nicely, because you find him just so cute and adorable and you love him a lot. It’s been a while since you spent time together too, so you know that he misses you a bit, he told you about it when he texted you at lunch. You weren’t expecting to see him with Yoongi at all when he opened the door before, weren’t expecting Yoongi either.

«I hate you» you mumble. He jumps on his feet, already knowing what your answer means, Jungkook sighs deeply and lets his head fall backwards. He wishes he could tell you that he wanted to take you home and cuddle you until you felt asleep tonight too, but he knows he can’t in front of them. So all there’s left to do is let go and shut his eyes close.

«I’ll come too» he groans.

«Yah, look at him. You’re really something else» Taehyung grins.

«Let’s go»

You ate sushi. Taehyung really missed spending time with you, when you’re together by yourselves it’s different then when people are around, more calm. He missed talking to you a lot, especially since in the last months you’ve been seeing each other twice or thrice a week but every time there’s always everyone else too, so getting to spend tonight just eating peacefully and talking to his friends feels relaxing. Beside for the fact that Jungkook had a scowl on his face for the last twenty minutes.

«What’s wrong with you?» he asks as he sips from his beer. Jungkook frowns.

«What?» he echoes.

«You’re annoyed by something» his friend points at him. You look at the man in front of you, his eyes shift to yours immediately.

«I’m not annoyed by anything»

«It doesn’t seem like it» you mumble.

Jungkook shrugs.

«I’m just tired, can’t we go home?»

«Now?» Taehyung raises his eyebrows at his friend, Jungkook munches on his lips and relaxes his shoulders.

«I’m tired» he mumbles. In fact, he doesn’t look full of energy, but not as tired as he says you guess.

«You’re getting old» Tae points at his face.

«Too bad for you, you’re older than me» he grins. A second later your friend scoffs at his attitude and throws his arm around you.

«What do you like about him? Why are you two best friends?» he teases. Jungkook crosses his arms on the table, he stares deep into his soul with a smirk as he waits for your answer.

«You’re friends with him too, you know» you snort.

«And sometimes I ask myself the same question»

«Oh, please» Kook shakes his head. He knows that you’re both teasing him but he hoped you would cut the chase. He wishes he could just tell Taehyung the rest of the story.

«You’re annoying,» your friend raises his forefinger «touchy,» he lifts his middle finger «too noisy,»

«You are too»

«I didn’t finish;» he narrows his eyes at him.

«I’m not touchy,» Jungkook looks at you with his pupils pleading «I’m not, am I?»

You raise your eyebrows: «A little?»

He blinks outraged, face blank and eyes wide.

«Why are you taking his side? You should be with me!» he whines.

«I love Taehyung too much» you shrug and giggle while he scoffs at the scene. Really outraged. Tae messes up your hair for the nth time today while trying to softly caress them as he would do with a puppy, making you slap his hand away. Your eyes meet Jungkook’s just to see him breathe in deeply through his nostrils, eyes staring at you as you laugh.

«What?-» Taehyung cuts your upcoming question off.

«And you talk to yourself a lot» he adds another finger.

Jungkook sneers at the last one, he kicks him with his foot from under the table. The man wails and bends over, hands hiding under the wood to cover the injured part.

«And did I say touchy?» he keens, receiving a death stare from the other one.

«Why? It’s true!»

«Yah, stop» you shake your head at the two, patting Taehyung’s shoulder.

«Did he really hurt you?» you try not to laugh but the whole situation just makes you want to giggle out loud. Still, you keep it silent.

«He works out too much» Taehyung blubbers, bringing his head on the table to cry silently.

«Come on, it wasn’t even a kick. You’re getting old» Jungkook huffs, but a second later his face goes from annoyed to actually worried, eyes clear and lips pouty.

«Hyung, did I hurt you for real?» he cock his eyebrows and you can see the way he munches on the inside of his cheek nervously. Taehyung sighs deeply, raising his middle finger in the air.

«Not really» he laughs. The younger lets go of a restrained breath, his shoulders fall as relief washes over him.

«You’re the worst» he mewls. Silence fills the air until Taehyung breaks out in a chuckle, you two following. Jungkook’s cheekbones are high and he wrinkles his nose as he laughs.

«Can we go for real?» he mumbles.

«Yah!»

There’s something bothering Jungkook that both you and him can’t quite grasp. It’s feeble and velvety but his mood is slightly off and the fact that he doesn’t know what’s making it like this is even worse. What he notices though, is that it started when he came into your office yesterday and it’s been going on until now. It’s making him huff at his desk as he tries to concentrate on the contract in front of him. He read the paper again and again until he decided that it would be better if he took a break cause his brain isn’t really listening now. He takes out his phone out, scrolls through his contacts to call Yoongi and ask him about the time you’re going to meet tonight, but a second later his phone rings and your name comes up on the screen. He clicks on the green button without even thinking about it.

«Koo» you call. He smiles at your tone, fixing his position on the chair.

«Yes?» he mumbles.

«You don’t need to come pick me up tonight»

He narrows his eyes and pouts his lips, not really understanding. This morning he gave you a ride and took you to work, you woke up late and apparently he woke up too soon and wasn’t feeling sleepy anymore, so with the excuse of that and the thought of not seeing you for the whole day he gladly and not so easily convinced you to get into his car. He doesn’t get why now you’re telling-

«Taehyung told me he’ll pick me up,» you explain «is it okay for you?»

He wrinkles his nose, eyes staring at the wall in front of him. He knows that you’re asking because last time this happened he said that he wanted to spend some time with you together before meeting the others.

«Of course» he nods.

«What time are we meeting?»

«Aish, you never check the group chat,» you scold «Yoongi sent a message this morning, it’s at seven»

«Too many messages,» he shakes his head

«guess I’ll see you then?»

«Of course» you smile. He’s about to close the call when he hears you call him again.

«Koo?»

He hums in response.

«Is something wrong?» you question, voice sweet. He shrugs, fills his cheeks with air just to pass it from one to the other for a few times, letting it out through his lips with a sigh.

«I don’t know,» he murmurs «I’m feeling a bit annoyed but I don’t know what it is»

You nod on the phone, putting him on speaker to lay your head on the desk.

«Does it have to do with the ride?»

«No, it’s not that» he shakes his head no.

«I really don’t know»

«Talk to me if there’s anything wrong,» you mumble «I’ll listen»

«I know» he beams. Hearing you say that makes him feel a bit lighter.

«I love you» your voice comes out low from the microphone and it makes him lick his lips as he smiles, reassured.

«I love you too»

Jungkook is already there when you enter the restaurant, standing by Namjoon that laughs at what Jin just said he shakes his head and throws his head back. He smiles at Joon and pats his back as he responds to Jin, Hana coming by his side to kiss his cheek just for the sake of it. He lays his hand on her hip, smiles back at her before going back to their conversation. Jungkook’s eyes instantly lay on his hand that stays still around her, his mind filling up with your face and how he wishes he could just do the same naturally, without thinking too much about it. Just a second later, he hears your voice from behind him and he spins on his heels almost hitting Namjoon in his ministrations. Fucking hell, you’re breathtaking.

Yoongi did say to dress good but not totally elegant, but this, shit this is art for the eyes. You look stunning, totally gorgeous and he thinks he’s probably drooling by now.

You hug Yoongi and Hyunjoo, he hears you tell her how beautiful she looks, you caress her bumpy belly sweetly, but fuck he doesn’t think you realise how good you look. And to think that this morning you were running all over the place saying that you were going to change your clothes at work and that you didn’t know what you got from your wardrobe cause you were running late.

«Jungkookah,» Namjoon pushes him with his elbow slightly «you’re giving your game away. Shut your mouth at least»

He gulps, fixes his posture. Fuck, he wishes he could tell him that you already know, there’s no point in denying it.

«She’s so…»

«I know,» Joon pats his shoulder «but she’s still your best friend so you should go greet her, maybe?»

His words don’t seem venomous at the beginning, he just nods to himself and strolls towards you. Taehyung is by your side and greeting the others with a big boxy smile on his face, he does the same with the maknae and decides to walk over to Namjoon a second later. Jungkook wraps his arm around your shoulder as he would do usually, squeezes you to his side until you have to pinch his nipple to let you out of his grasp. The scowl that follows on his face doesn’t go unnoticed even by Jin and Namjoon that are standing a few meters away.

«You hurt me» he keens.

«Oh, come on, I didn’t» you scoff. The light makes your skin glow, it takes his breath away. It doesn’t matter for how many years this has been going on, his heart sings always the same melody and the tempo goes by quicker when you look at him and smile.

«When did you arrive?»

«Oh, five minutes ago» he shrugs. You nod, look at the others.

«Eunji?»

«She’s on her way with Jimin»

Taehyung comes back to you, hooks is arm around yours and beckons you to do the same with Jungkook’s before walking towards the table to make you sit between them, he almost looks like he came out of a vintage movie with his beige wide leg pants and the satisfied smile on his lips.

The others arrive in a bunch of minutes, Eunji and Jimin with some bags hanging by his arm, Hoseok just a few moments later dressed in colourful clothes and a beanie that probably costs more than what you and Jungkook pay for your monthly rent.

With the table full, Jin announces the beginning of the dinner and the usual chaotic atmosphere begins, everyone talking and remembering things that make you laugh and nod every ten seconds. Jungkook notices the way you look at him from time to time, just like you always do when there are people around you. He sees how when you talk about something your eyes meet his first, how you punch his shoulder lightly when he moans too loud cause his beer is just too good.

«You did that on purpose!» Yoongi laughs.

«I didn’t! She came out of nowhere!» Hoseok points at Hana that keeps laughing uncontrollably.

«I told you I was coming with the cake!» she can’t even speak from how much she’s laughing.

«She did» you nod as you giggle.

«Did you have to come in that moment?» Hoseok takes a sip from his drink.

«Yes, it was the moment of the cake, you were the one in the way!»

«Aish, unbelievable» Jin shakes his head.

«You’re trying to blame us when you were the one with his mind elsewhere»

«I didn’t do it on purp-»

«Oh, you did» Yoongi’s shoulders lift repeatedly as his chest shakes.

«I’m betting everything you have that you did it on purpose cause we had a fight ten minutes before»

Jungkook bursts out laughing: «Yah, why would you bet everything he has?»

You cackle beside him, your head falling backwards.

«Cause he has more than me! Have you see his beanie?» the older points at Hoseok’s head.

«It’s a gift, dummy» he clicks his tongue on his palate «and I’m telling you I didn’t!»

The memory is one of those that make you titter when you think about it. It was Yoongi’s birthday and Jin gladly made his cake with so much affection, you remember that he spent the whole day working on it, it was so pretty and you could already feel it melt in your mouth. You were excited to try it cause you knew that he made it based on Yoongi’s likes that in terms of cakes are pretty similar to yours, however, you never got the chance to taste it. Hana was helping him in the kitchen and you swear you heard her say that she was going to come out with the cake but-

«Aish, you literally hit it just at the right spot to make me dig my face in it!»

That’s what happened. Hoseok turned around just as Hana was coming out of the door and he hit it with his elbow as he was turning, Yoongi was right behind him and Hana just a few centimetres away trying to pass through. The cake went upwards and Yoongi couldn’t even blink twice that he had it all over his face, face deep into the cream.

«Yah, hajima-» Jimin is on the verge of tears «I can’t see when I laugh»

«You’re so dumb» Eunji hits his shoulder.

«What, what? I really can’t see!»

The waiters bring the food to the table, Jin slaps the ass of one of them as he puts the dishes in front of him and it makes Jimin laugh harder as the poor guy scoffs at him. He talked a lot about one of the waiters especially, said that he had a lot of potential and was a really good person, so you guess it’s him.

A dish full of kkaennip jangajji gets placed in front of you, rice as banchan on the side, chopsticks shining.

«I was craving this yesterday!» Hyunjoo wheezes at the sight, eyes wide as she dives down on her plate and smells it with all her might. Hana and you giggle at your friend, Eunji smiling happily at her. It’s so good to see her happy with such a little thing, sometimes she texts the girl group chat deep at night craving for things that make you wince; just four days ago she was craving for a combination that- ew, pancakes and ketchup.

Jin pats Yoongi’s shoulder.

«Yoongi made me cook it appositely»

You don’t expect her to lift her head with that look on her face, but she does. Her eyes water and the corners of her lips lower at the look of the future father of her child.

«I love you» she sniffs, making Yoongi burst out in a laugh.

«I know, I love you too sweetie» he rubs her back lovingly «now eat, will you?»

Hoseok’s eyes are big just at the scene in front of him, totally taken aback by the sweetness between the two. Jungkook feels his inside burn as he stares down at his plate, fingers tingling just to touch you in any way possible, even a brush of his fingers on your shoulder would be enough. He wishes he could just show you the same as Yoongi does with Hyunjoo. You only smile at the two, not really noticing the way his eyes peek at you.

«Okay, I’m hungry» Jimin is the first to dig down into his meal, chopsticks grabbing the perilla leaf from his plate to wrap it around the rice.

The table fills with giggles and snorts once more, the atmosphere is light and cozy. Your friends make it easy for you to love them, every single one. Of course they have their moments - like that time that you fought with Taehyung cause he called you four times in an hour while you were at work, or the other when Hoseok and you fought over a pen -, you have them too, but they’re like a second family, you wouldn’t want it in any other way. Your eyes meet Jungkook at the thought, almost as if he’s the bright sun behind the clouds, and you feel it rooted deep inside you, how much he means. His mouth his full, cheeks swollen as he munches on the rice but when he feels your eyes on him he turns around immediately. Even when he look like a squirrel full of almonds, you-

«Shibal, why are they like this?» Taehyung huffs loudly beside you. Your attention shifts to him, he has a big scowl on his face and he stares angrily at the perilla leaves in front of him, chopsticks trying as much as they can to separate one from the other. You scoff at him, shake your head.

Jungkook still has his eyes on you, he watches as you bring your chopsticks to the dish to grab the corner of the leaf and slide one of the sticks under it. You slowly move it from side to side to make it part from the other underneath, his eyes wide and his cheeks full like a mochi he stares as you bring it to Taehyung’s dish and place it on his rice.

Only then he gulps: «Yah!»

Your shoulder raise frightened, head turning immediately with your heart in your throat. You see his mouth open, eyes big and eyebrows cocked in a shocked expression, Namjoon’s words echo in his ears. Now, they definitely feel venomous.

You’re still his best friend.

«Wha- what? What happened?» you quiver.

Taehyung peeks over your shoulder, eyes glued to Jungkook’s face. Jimin and Eunji in front of you stare at the scene with their knowing expressions but they clearly don’t understand what’s happening cause no one knows the full version of the story. And Jungkook suddenly feels his stomach close up and his breath getting stuck as he looks at you.

«You- why… I can’t do this,» he shakes his head and brings his hands to his lap «I’m going out for a minute»

His chair chimes strident as he slides it backwards, and a second later he’s walking towards the door of the restaurant with his hands by his sides and everyone looking at him. You don’t seem to remember how to breathe for a bunch of seconds.

What happened? What-

«Oh, fuck» Jimin brings his hands on his hair, tugging at them nervously. Eunji gulps down her food, eyes on the empty spot beside you, Taehyung looks over at the door, Namjoon breathes in nervously and Jin and Hana look each other with eyes that seem to communicate words that you don’t grasp simply because you aren’t looking anywhere but at Jungkook’s dish, his chopsticks laid on the brims.

Yoongi clears his throat, looks over at her girlfriend, Hoseok peeks at you and a second later you’re storming out of the restaurant with their eyes on you and yours already trying to see Jungkook from the glass of the door.

When it shuts behind you, Namjoon licks his lips and smiles.

«Finally, it had to happen» he nods light hearted, Yoongi scoffing as he tries to get a look of you two outside.

«Yah, give them some privacy» Taehyung scolds his hyung, Hoseok shaking his head at the group.

You can read the second part here: Closer: Too Close

Read more about Closer here: Closer

Taglist: @p-i-e-d-p-i-p-e-r, @kaitlynlovesbm, @bytheinaya, @jub-jub, @taolucha, @mianyas1998, @seoulrenebae-blog, @ppeachyttae, @gluk97, @jk97bam, @diorh0seokie, @gwsjungkookie, @moonlikemeh, @skzthinker, @jungkookieeee97, @eysloveskoosomuch, @sleepy-sae, @jjkw-7, @singularityjes, @spookybirstarfish, @vvicadiction, @kimchijeonjk, @suciedad-divina, @katarinamae

194 notes · View notes

thosehallowedhalls · 2 months

Text

Home

Book: Crimes of Passion

Pairing: M!Trystan Thorne x Emma Rose (F!MC)

Rating: Teen

Word count: 1138

Summary: Five times Trystan asked Emma to move in with him and the one time she said yes.

A/N: Submission for @choicesmonthlychallenge, rainbow prompts + National Take a Walk in the Park day (both in the fourth vignette).

One

“No offense, but old New York apartments are a menace,” Trystan says, opening his door wider to let Emma in.

“I’ve lost half my plays,” she complains as she drops her overnight bag on the floor. “My Folio editions were spared, but my collection of second-hand Penguins is a soggy wreck.”

“Not to be insensitive to your predicament, but I’m more worried about other things.”

“Like my furniture?”

“That, and the fact that your apartment flooding means the probability of mold in the very near future.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. I’m not looking forward to a mold infection.” She pinches the bridge of her nose. “Can I stay with you for a few days?”

“I hoped that went without saying.”

“Thanks.” She looks around. “I don’t think I’ve ever spent more than a couple nights in a row here. It’ll be a little weird staying longer than that.”

“Maybe we should see it as a sign.”

“Of what?”

“That you should move in here.”

She snorts. “Yeah, let’s ask Ruby and Luke while we’re at it. Make a commune out of it.”

He could tell her he wasn’t kidding, but if that’s her reaction to what she thinks is a joke, she definitely isn’t ready. So he files it away for now.

“Come on, I’ll make you dinner.”

She sighs. “I really love you.”

“So I’ve been told.”

Two

He tries again a month later. They’re lying in bed on a Sunday morning, lazing about and enjoying a rare day off. Tracing a hand down her side, relishing the warmth of her skin, he doesn’t even think before the words are out of his mouth. “Move in with me.”

She goes completely still. “Here?”

“Yes? We can look for someplace else if you want, but I've always thought you liked my apartment.”

“I do, it’s just…” She seems to be searching for the right words. “We’ve only been together for three months.”

“And in that time, we took down three killers, an extortion ring masquerading as a cult, the Russian mob, and a jewel thief. Besides, if spending a month with my family didn’t send you running for the hills, nothing will. Move in with me.”

“Trystan…”

“That’s a no tone if I ever heard one.”

“It’s been three months,” she says again. “It’s too soon.”

“Very well. We can revisit the topic later.” He pulls her on top of him. “In the meantime, I have a few ideas about how to spend today.”

She smiles against his lips. “I’m all ears.”

Three

They’ve just stumbled into his apartment, both bleeding from various scrapes and cuts, and bruising already forming on their bodies.

Never again, Trystan swears, will they go after a pair of knife-wielding accidental kidnappers amped up on methamphetamine.

“Ugh.” She winces when she places a hand on her stomach. “Why couldn’t this happen closer to my apartment? I have an actual first aid kit there, not the pitiful thing you think passes for one.”

“You could keep your first aid kit here. You know, if you lived here.”

Emma groans. “You’re seriously bringing up moving in together now?”

“Why not? I love you. Do you love me?”

Even when aching from half a dozen different body parts, she can’t resist teasing him. “Well…”

He waves this off. “You love me. So why not move in with me? I’ve got a better coffee machine and wi-fi connection anyway.”

“Can’t argue with that one. But it is, I am forced to repeat, much too soon.”

He shrugs. “As you wish. Pass me those bandages, will you?”

Four

They’re walking down Central Park, both holding a cup of coffee and enjoying the balmy spring breeze. A motley of flowers explodes around them, a vibrant jumble of colors and scents. Trystan takes a deep breath. “God, I love this time of year.”

“Yeah, it’s hard to beat New York in the spring.”

He laces his fingers with hers. “Or this particular spot in the city. This is your favorite coffee shop, isn’t it?”

“One of them.”

“It’s only a couple of blocks from my apartment.”

She rolls her eyes. “Oh, here we go.”

“You’re practically living there already,” he points out.

“I keep a toothbrush and a set of workout clothes there. Not quite the same thing.”

“Semantics. If your things live with me, why can’t you?”

“I don’t think you understand what you’re asking. I’d be there all the time.”

“Yes, I believe that goes without saying.”

“Most couples that live together don’t also work together. We’d be on top of each other nonstop.”

“Can’t say I’d mind that,” he says with a grin, then laughs when she gives him a light shove. “Fine. I’ll ask again next month.”

Five

“So when are you two taking the plunge?” Luke asks.

They’ve just left Mafalda’s house after dinner, a dinner where he and Ruby announced that they’re moving in together. Appalled, she turns to him. “Luke! Rude!”

“Oh, today isn’t about us.” Emma chimes in. “I’d rather talk about when you’re going to ask Ruby to marry you.”

When he flushes bright red, she smirks. “That’s what I thought.”

Once they’re in his car, Trystan turns to her. “You know, Luke makes an excellent point. When are we taking the plunge?”

She gives him a sideways glance. “Of course you’re going to jump on that. I’m almost surprised you didn’t say anything back there.”

“I would never.” Taken aback that she’d think otherwise, he cuts her a look. “First of all, that was their moment. And second, using others to convince you falls outside the bounds of fair play.”

“I know.” Her voice has gone a lot softer. “I’m just teasing.”

“Besides,” he adds. “I wasn’t particularly eager to hear you say no in front of all our friends.”

She gives him an odd look. “And you’re sure I would have said no, huh?”

“Evidence points to yes.”

“Hmm.” But she doesn’t say anything else afterwards.

Six

Emma stretches from her spot on the couch after the longest workday in recent memory. “God, I hate paperwork days. I’m too tired to move. Okay if I stay over tonight?”

“Sure. Or you could just move in already,” Trystan says, reaching for the remote.

“Okay.”

His hand freezes in mid-air. “Sorry, what?”

“I’ll move in.”

He blinks. “You’ll move in. With me?”

“Unless you’re planning to move out, yeah.” At his blank look, she seems to shrink a little. “But hey, if you’ve changed your mind…”

A slow smile spreads over his face. “Oh, not even close. Took you long enough.”

“From where I’m standing, it took me just long enough.”

“You would find a way to argue about this.”

“Does that surprise you?”

“Not remotely.” He tugs her into his arms and presses a lingering kiss to her forehead. “Welcome home, Emma.”

#trystan x emma #trystan x mc #trystan thorne #emma rose #crimes of passion #playchoices

39 notes · View notes

faithisasuperstar · 5 months

Text

flicker in the dark → coral

coral!tbosas x reader

notes → in which you meet the tribute you will be mentoring, and she turns out to be something you never would’ve expected. feminine intended reader though i do not know if pronouns are brought up.

warnings → y’all, she is so over the top ooc… (i molded her character after vi from arcane lol 🙈) not edited & uploaded via iphone!! i also haven’t written in months lol

trailing behind your fellow mentor and dear friend, lysistrata vickers, you couldn’t help but grow anxious of the impending meeting with the tribute you had been assigned. nearing the zoo where the tributes were being kept in this year, your heart rate sped up. the practice of mentoring a tribute was something that had never been done before, so nerves were on edge. and on top of that, the thought of the twenty-four district children being kept on display in a monkey house was enough to make you shiver with disgust. though, it was not much better than the horse stables they had been kept in prior to this year. if you were lucky, your tribute would be willing to cooperate with you like coriolanus’ girl, lucy gray, had. thoughts swamped your brain as lyssie dragged you to the front of the cage, about to part ways with you to find her respective tribute, the hulking district twelve boy.

“y/n, you have nothing to lose here. we’re simply here to help them get through this as easily and… painlessly as possible,” she said, muttering the last phrase with underlying bitterness. both lysistrata and yourself were not fans of the hunger games. the prospect of dehumanizing and stripping the rights, as well as dignity, away from children your own age was safe to say, unappealing. with the war long over, shouldn’t the killing have ended by now too?

“i know, lyssie, i just…” you paused, averting your gaze, “don’t know if i’ll be able to face her knowing what she’s about to go through. to think she’s our age, too… it’s… i don’t know how i can even help her.” you couldn’t find the words to accurately form your thought, but lysistrata understood.

“i get it, i do. just show her what you brought her.” lysistrata patted you on the back and wandered towards the side of the enclosure that her tribute resided in. it didn’t take long to spot your tribute, who’s name you learned to be coral. her fiery red hair could be pinpointed from a mile away.

you sighed, slowly walking up to the metal bars of the enclosure. “coral?” you tried, catching the attention of some tributes sitting closer to the bars, but not coral. pausing, you pursed your lips and tried again, calling out for her louder. this got the attention of her district partner, mizzen, who nudged coral. she looked up at mizzen and he nodded towards you. unsure of what exactly to do as they both glared at you, you waved sheepishly. coral gave a look to mizzen, then stood, striding over to where you were standing.

as she reached the bars, you had to shift your gaze upwards to look her in the eye. “and who might you be, doll face?” she asked, her tone condescending as she eyed you up and down.

“hi, i’m y/n, i’ll be your mentor for the games.” you stuck your hand through the bars to her and attempted to introduce yourself, but realized that the hand you had offered was holding the bag of items that you had brought for her. you quickly placed it down for a second to properly shake her hand, only for her to ignore the gesture and continue to stare expectantly.

“mendor, huh? so rainbow girl was right after all.” you nodded in agreement, assuming she was referring to lucy gray. “so what are you gonna do for me?” you paused, thinking of the best way to put it.

“i’m going to try my best to help you win. and take care of you, of course.” the look she gave you made you think you had three heads, and you shrunk under her gaze.

“i’m sorry, sweetheart, but how are you going to help me?” she almost laughed.

“well, my job as a mentor is to introduce you to the public, to make you more appealing so that people will want to watch the games.” you explained.

“appealing, huh. am i not already?” coral asked mockingly, criticizing your choice of words. she moved forward to grip to bars and stooped down boldly to be eye to eye with you. you stuttered, quickly looking away in embarrassment.

“i mean- yes- but that wasn’t what i meant, really!” you quickly tried, but she simply laughed at you. regaining her posture, she glanced at the bag you had set on the floor.

“and what’s this?” she queried, urging you to pick it up and show her.

“i brought you some food!” you offered, “you should really eat if you want to make it into the arena with enough strength to fight.” you tried, which was a dumb, obvious statement, but it seemed like a safe bet.

“i appreciate the sentiment, sweetheart. but you don’t know what i need and don’t need.” despite the nickname, her tone was brimmed with hostility. you didn’t blame her for refusing the food, your very essence reeked of privilege, and you could tell she wasn’t one to accept pity favors. the stark contrast of your ironed uniform and manicured nails next to her unwashed attire and nails covered in dirt was off putting. you could not imagine how she felt being here, being forced to play a losing game. and on top of that, the ones who had put her in this position claimed to want to help her. the war was hard for everybody, but your family had managed to pick itself back up off of it’s feet. on the other hand, families in the district had to pay the price for lives they did not take.

“i’m just trying to help, coral, really. these games are- they’re horrible. if i had a choice i wouldn’t participate. but i don’t. so the least i could do is help you get through them.” you spilled your opinion to her in hopes that she would accept the sustenance. picking the bag up off of the ground, you unzipped it, allowing her to take a look at the food you had brought.

stuffed full of homemade chicken and cheese sandwiches, as well as some other miscellaneous foods sitting closer to the bottom, it was evident you had spent time trying to organize food for her to have. she glanced at the bag, then whipped her head around towards mizzen, calling him towards her. he approached and she showed him the arrangement of foods. you saw his eyes light up and you couldn’t help but feel helpful, as small a gesture as it was.

“i don’t know if they’ve fed you or not, but…” you trailed off, allowing them to take a few of the sandwiches and an abundance of fruit, as well as a hardboiled egg or two. peering around at the rest of the tributes, some of which had been staring at the bag of food, you realized that if you were to give them the whole contents of the bag now, others would try to steal some. and while that was not necessarily a bad thing, considering your guilt for them in this situation, you had made these strictly for coral, and mizzen was just a part of the package. “coral, maybe you should eat these now. i don’t think it’s the greatest idea to hand over all of the food right now.” you suggested. she quickly realized what you meant and plopped down to the floor, egg in mouth and mizzen close behind. as you looked down at her sitting criss-cross in shock, she gestured for you to take a seat as well. it was like a picnic of some sorts. the odd, repulsive sort of one, but a picnic nonetheless.

the pair made no effort to make conversation as they chowed down their food, and you couldn’t blame them. you twiddled your thumbs in silence for a solid twelve minutes before anyone had spoken up. scoping out the rest of the tributes, you realized that coral was a very strong contender compared to some of the other girls. the thought that the odds may be in her favor brought a smile to your face. “thanks, cupcake.” coral was already on her feet before you could even process the statement. you stood, dusting the dirt off of your uniform before smiling at coral.

“it’s what i’m here for. i’ll try to check in as much as i can. there’s some events that the gamemakers are planning, too. they want to hold one on one mentor-tribute interviews, a tour of the arena, as well as an additional interview that will be aired to panem.” you informed her and mizzen, who made sure to stand close by.

“so this won’t be the last i see of you?” she asked.

“most definitely not.” you confirmed, nodding.

“good.” she winked, turning away with mizzen in tow. from the interaction, she proved to be quite the enigma. despite her circumstances, she still had a confident, collected, and enticing aura about her, leaving you in awe, if not more.

#coral #coral tbosas #coral tbosas x reader #coral thg x reader #coral thg #coral x reader #thg #the hunger games #thg x reader #the hunger games x reader #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas x reader #the ballad of songbirds and snakes x reader #thg fanfiction #tbosas fanfiction

112 notes · View notes

cheesus-doodles · 2 years

Text

A Friend In Me: Chapter 2

Yandere Platonic Toman

‎‎‎

<< Chapter 1

Masterlist

‎A/N: Holy hell, it's been a while! Really glad to be back from my break, it's honestly weird to not be writing every free minute I have. Crunch time just to finally get this out on time for my boy's birthday :3 As usual I will edit the grammatical errors later cause its super late now. Happy (very belated) Birthday Mikey!!

‎‎

It was an unusual spring in your step and an exceptionally cheery hum on your lips that accompanied you when you returned to school the following week, your spirits riding high off a fun-filled weekend surrounded by your precious friends. Albeit it was a break that the boys had forced a very reluctant you to take against your will and the mountain of homework piled high up on your desk. Yet all it took was a lavish sprinkle of whining and tugging and pleading, combined with a generous serving of extra strength puppy eyes, and you caved like the crispy top of one of your homemade pot pies.

And that was hands down the best decision your friends had ever made for you all month, you had to admit.

As someone whose life had been all but consumed in an endless cycle of school, work, home and utter loneliness up till meeting Baji and Mikey on that fateful afternoon, it blew your mind that there was so much to see, so much to do in this city you’ve lived your whole life in. Maybe it was just that the city came alive when you were with your friends, the alluring lights dotting skyscrapers winking at you from the distant skyline. Or maybe it was the laughs and smiles that helped saturate the sounds and sights that filled your wide eyes and ears. Be it fishing by the riverbank in the outskirts of the city with Draken and Pah-chin, which you had barbecued there and then and eaten the fish, trying out a new cafe in outskirts with Mitsuya and Mikey, a half-an-hour bus ride away from your home, or even just picnicking in a public park under the shade of a century old tree with Kazutora and Baji, you never found a reason for your smile to drop.

Needless to say, the high spirits carried over from weekends translated into a bounce in your step as you skipped the last few steps to the gates of your school, waving goodbye to Mikey who had dropped you off. You could do this. You were certain you could. All this time spent around friends who truly cared for you, who so kindly, so patiently helped you through your social anxiety - if you couldn’t make a single one on your own, maybe you didn’t deserve any. But you wouldn’t let them down, not this time.

Confidence at an all-time high and in the midst of giving yourself a pep talk, the ever so slight crinkle of the corners of Mikey’s black eyes and the small smirk that quickly faded from his face slipped by you unnoticed.

“Morning, Yamamoto-kun, Kaito-kun!” You chirped out, completely undeterred from the lack of responses you were receiving from the various classmates shuffling by: they had been enthusiastic enough last Friday after all. It was probably just the Monday blues, and you conveniently brushed off the nervous glances sent your way. The morning sun shining directly into your classroom - the same one that shone on you last week as you finally broke ground with new people on your own accord - brought with it a sense of hopefulness with the refracted fragile lines of rainbows through large clear glass windows. Spending a few minutes to watch as the rays dance across the still classroom filled with students, you resigned yourself to reminiscing about your amazing weekend while waiting for the gloom to drain from the atmosphere.

Alas, it seemed your understanding of the situation was far from reality, and the realization only finally dawned when homeroom, and then first class dragged on and the expected friendliness never materialized.

“Tanaka-kun! How was…your…week…end?” Your voice trailed off as said boy simply stalked pass without a glance in your way, your raised hand slowly retracting back under the table as you watched his back disappear round a corner, not once acknowledging your presence. And he wasn’t the first with those cold shoulders and even colder glares that you couldn’t even begin to understand, already one of countless you had been on the receiving end of in the first few hours of classes. Biting back the tears you felt starting to well up in your eyes, at least the risen sun melted away a little of the icy reception you received. Why? What did you do? Maybe it was the way you were pronouncing their names? Was it your expression?

No matter. “I’ll try harder.” You mumbled to yourself under your breath for the umpteenth time even as your fingers picked at the corner of bleeding fingernails, the other hand tugging and grasping at the hem of your school shirt. You could always try harder.

But as time dragged on and your class started and ended one by one, it became clear to you that social skills just simply weren’t a strong suit of yours. And your mind - or more so your heart, you suspected - started to fail in its ability to push back those nagging voices that haunted you, allowing them to roar straight back to the front of your thoughts. What you felt now - it was like that dream you had again and again of falling off the tallest skyscraper headfirst. Your dream never had you crash into the warm pavement below, but you could confidently say you learn that feeling first hand; your hopes of making even more friends through your own ability all but smashed into million pieces, and yourself dunked straight back into the harsh cold waters of reality.

Yet all you could do was unwillingly trudge on, clinging to the last bit of hope as you slumped into your seat. In a vain attempt to turn your bittering thoughts off your current treatment by who you once thought were acquaintances - you were hesitant to call them friends so quickly, and you guessed that was the right call after all - you turned your attention to the vacant seats littering the classroom. And there were quite a few of them to your surprise as you mentally tallied the total count, and there didn’t seem to be any one pattern to reason for so many of your classmates to not be here. Maybe the flu? But it wasn’t flu season. Or maybe it was just that they had too much fun over the weekend and didn’t feel like coming back, cause that would have been your reason as well.

The ring of the school bell broke you from your thoughts: banded classes were starting as evident with the scrapping of chairs against wooden flooring and scuffling of bags against tables, and you had to move. Leaping to your feet as you scrambled to gather your scattered belongings, you mustered what remained of your courage at the familiar sight of brown pigtails, turning with what you hoped was a bright smile. “Ah Aki-kun, wait for m-”

“Stop! Stay away!”

You froze. “I-”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t know.” The normally mild-natured bespectacled girl all but hissed at you as shoved past you, another icy voice you never expected from another mouth you were certain you never crossed. “You did this to them! Just - stay away from me!”

All you ever did was to call out to her to wait so that you could pack. And she and everyone else left you standing there alone, your belongings half strewn across the table top with the other half messily stuffed into your bag. The cloudy skies and cool breeze that kissed your skin and teased your hair, coupled with the copious amounts of food and laughter you enjoyed with your friends over the weekend, now seemed so distant, a stark contrast to the bleak present you were in. You stiffly stuffed the rest of the items into your bag.

No one wanted to sit, talk or even look in your direction. For reasons beyond you, no matter where or who you desperately reached out to, the reaction you received was exactly the same. Different people, different classes. Nothing.

“I’m sorry for whatever I did.” You muttered, but it was really more for yourself than anyone around, your fingernails only digging further into already bruising flesh. “I’m sorry.” Being plunged once more back into miserable isolation was a difficult feeling to bear quietly; just when you thought, for once in your life, that you've made it. Yet all you could do was curl into yourself and mumble apologies under your breath to whoever out there could hear you, whoever would hear you. For what unknown crimes you weren't sure, but if everyone else agreed it was all your fault for something, who were you to disagree? You must have done it.

Time seemed to drag on forever, every minute an excruciating hour spent trying to ignore those inhospitable glares digging into your back wherever you went. At least the one thing you could be sure of, lost in this confusing world alone with your self-esteem falling off a cliff face, was that the clock still ticked uncaringly on, dragging you forward with every rotation of the second hand - it brought with it hope that this nightmare would come to an end.

Staring out the window, your teacher’s voice faded away into the background as you watched cars speed by to destination unknowns, the sunlight twinkling off reflective paint a mocking reminder of how cold you felt despite the afternoon heat. You always thought you had hit rock bottom before, but it seemed that that had been nothing but a false bottom just waiting to spring open. What were you even thinking? Trying to make friends as if you could? You failed, those whispering voices laughed at you repeatedly, their taunts echoing in your head and in your ears. You failed.

You tried to pull yourself together as best you could - perhaps it was all just a misunderstanding. Maybe your classmates had mistook someone else for you. But then why was this feeling of dread settling comfortably into your gut as if it had always been there? Or this incessant thought that all your friendships were built on nothing but pity? You failed not just yourself. You failed them.

It was a miracle you made it to lunch without so much a leaky nose, having barely held yourself together through the various classes and murderous looks that you probably deserved with nothing more than tightly pursed lips and a silent vow to yourself to not further embarrass everyone you knew. But as the clock ticked down little by little to lunch and you spotted the all too familiar mob of lilac hair settling just outside the wall of your classroom, you came to the quick realization that there was no way you could face Mitsuya without instantly bursting into tears - the same hastily, desperately, erected walls that you had holding back the quickly surging tide of emotions would crumble. The knot of dread and shame that settled in the base of your gut only grew and grew.

And then the bell went off.

“Hey!” Mitsuya stepped forward to greet you as you appeared through the doorway of your classroom, arms spread for his routine hug you never failed to return. The eagerness at spending his precious lunch time with you was clearly written on his face, yet you couldn’t even face him. “Let’s head to -”

Wordlessly, you shoved past him, reddening eyes and cheeks hidden in your sleeves, and you disappeared into the growing crowd.

You didn’t return to school. It was the first time you had ever skipped school too; ironic that it was this meaningless nonsense that finally broke your back and not the group’s persistent invitations of fun and adventure. Your feet trailed a path you knew so well, and you found yourself back at the small lazy river snaking its way downstream noiselessly - the smell of grass and flowers and water bringing back those memories of many happier days spent here with your friends, imagined or otherwise.

How could you face the others like this as an absolute failure? And those nagging voices pipped up once more - had those six boys even really been your friends? The simple question stumped you; what should have been a clear and resounding ‘yes’ instead turned into a strong sense of being stranded and lost in your own mind at the same time.

You didn't even know what you did to your classmates. Has your classmates' friendliness been nothing more than pure imagination? Then were Mikey's and Baji's and the others’ fake too? Could you have just been seeing their eager eyes and bright smiles in your head? What if they left you? Certain that you wouldn't like the answer to that question, you pushed it to the back of your mind like the rest of your pathetic existence as you huddled further into your jacket, desperate for some comfort, any comfort. Kicking a stone down the path, the river continued to flow undisturbed even as you failed to stop the tears that welled up and poured down your cheeks in hot streams, or the hiccups and whimpers that leaked from between bitten lips.

Even still, no matter how much you doubted your own judgment, the sunlight that tanned your skin yet failed to warm you didn’t seem to brighten your world as much as when you had been with them.

Stumbling back home alone wasn’t anything you weren’t familiar with, having done it every day before you met Baji and Mikey. Your feet were sore from hours of walking down alongside the river, yet they still faithfully carried you home, trudging the dead streets in the light of the evening sun. But so caught up in your self pity were you that you almost failed to notice all 6 of the boys already waiting for you, scattered in smaller groups along the street outside your house. You instantly froze upon catching a glimpse of that unmistakable gray checkered jacket from the corner of your dry, bloodshot eyes, but it was too late, Mikey having already spotted you, expectant gaze turned from the overcast sky to meet yours. The rest looked up when you meekly approached, eyes lowered and not daring to look at what you assumed was fury - at you? - blazing in those gazes.

For a moment, all was silent. Even the wind who had been faithfully drying your tears stilled in that moment, and you thought you fucked up this friendship too. It was all over for you.

But when a cold drink was thrust into your hands by a red-faced and mumbling Baji, and Draken rested a hand atop your head and gently asked you what happened, you couldn't hold back the tears any longer, your already painful eyes squeezing as a fresh wave ran down your cheeks. You couldn’t care less about what you looked like any more.

“I don’t understand,” you mumbled under your breath, delicate fingers white from clutching desperately to the worn strap of your school bag. “Is it me?”

Was it something you did? Was it something you said? Maybe it was just you? You didn’t dare look up again at the boys, a fresh wave of hot painful tears spilling from eyes already swollen from the earlier pity party you threw yourself. And the silence you received in response only seemed to align with what you always believed deep down. Pathetic. You must look absolutely pathetic, a sniveling mess in your crumpled uniform. This must be what your classmates had seen of you, yet there was not much you could do in the moment to change - to improve - that in front of the six boys you naively called friends. “I’ll - go. If it’s me.”

If they wanted you gone, the least you could do was pick up what was left of your broken heart and make sure you do your best to never let them have to look at you again. Maybe move across Japan, maybe even overseas. No one would need or want such a pitiful friend to throw a wet blanket on their day, and you understood that well. You wouldn’t hate them in the slightest for their decision.

A blink, and you found yourself engulfed in a warm comforting hug, familiar arms wrapped around you as best as they could under and around your bag straps. “Don’t be stupid.” Mitsuya sighed out, one hand running soothingly through your hair and a rare indulgent smile pulling at his lips when you finally broke down and started bawling into his shoulder, yet the boy barely seemed concerned with the growing wet patch on his shirt as you buried your shame in the depths of the soft cotton.

‎

What you didn’t know was just shy out of range of your still fragile emotions and your cone of view, it was a breath of relief your six friends hadn’t even realized they’ve been holding that was let slipped and floated off on the light breeze, the tension that had been draped heavy over them finally lifting.

When they had first heard of you simply shoving past Mitsuya at lunch to run off by yourself through said boy’s worried messages and calls to Mikey, they weren’t quite sure what to think. Maybe it had just been a bad day? Completely possible, given that they did have a hand in contributing to that. But it was only when you failed to return to your classes after lunch (a first ever for you, you cared far too much about your studies to ever skip) was when the panic finally started to sink in, settling into the base of their gut like an uncomfortable glop. Instantly leaping to his feet, Mikey was barking out orders and everyone was racing to their assigned search area, fanning out to look for any sign of you.

Anger, irritation, anything that wasn’t you being back in their arms had all seemed to melt away from their thoughts as they combed the streets. Have you figured out what they did? Were you trying to run from them, break off your friendship? What if you left? Unthinkable consequences the boys were hesitant to even consider should thoughts have power, and chose to collectively sweep under the rug when such possible outcomes were brought up during their secret meetings in the shadows of Musashi Temple. How to plead their case to you was not something any of them was eager to find out.

But for all the anxiety and sweat and tears you put them through, was this all you had been worried about? That they, of all people, would be disappointed you couldn’t make friends by yourself?

“You’ll- you’ll let me know i-if I m-m-mess up?” You managed to whimper out between your adorable hiccups, flushed cheeks only serving to highlight bloodshot eyes.

You hadn’t even stopped to consider the one-eighty in your classmates, about your sudden shunning in school and whether they had a role in that. Such a heretic thought must have never even crossed your mind, and it was then that it dawned on them they could truly do no wrong in your eyes: not your beloved friends who cared deeply for you. And that was what they liked so much about you - that you never doubted them, only yourself.

No response was needed for such a silly question - you could never ‘mess up’ in any way that would matter to them when it came to not ‘making friends’ - and you were quickly and roughly yanked off Mitsuya by a grinning Pah, momentarily stunning you out of your crying as you were sent flying for a brief second. “Kazutora, catch!” Landing smack in said boy’s chest, the boy with the black and gold hair only had enough time to toss your bag onto a nearby bench and sneak in a quick yet tight hug before you were once again pulled away, a flash of long black momentarily blocking your sight as Baji earned himself a loud cry of indignation. Kazutora once more attempted to launch himself at you, only to miss and be sent flying at Mikey instead.

Your anxiety and tears were no match against the sheer force of your friends’ cheer as each boy took turns yanking and pulling you into their own big hugs, the tried and true exaggerated pats on your back and hard ruffles of your hair not failing to pull your lips upwards. “Bastards,” The lilac-haired boy could only shake his head at having you pulled from his arms, but the smile on his lips was clear, and he reached out to grab you mid-flight for a quick cuddle before allowing you to be stolen away again by a cheeky Draken. Hiccups morphing into giggles and into all-out laughter as you were pulled here and there, you couldn’t help the happiness bubbling up into your chest and bursting free, your face buried into various shoulders and chests (and a single armpit, courtesy of Mikey).

“What did your shitty classmates do this time?” Baji sneered, as he dodged under Kazutora’s arm, pulling you out of reach from those grabby fingers.

“It’s not them, I-”

Mikey cut you off. “Nah, it’s definitely them.”

As the others echoed the same view, under the barrage of assurances that you couldn’t possibly fuck up, not with them, the fear that had been weighing on your chest, that made it hard to breathe, finally lifted. Your arms grabbed from the sides by Kazutora and Mikey, you had no choice but to laugh along as you were all but mobbed by your friends, frogmarched towards their bikes for yet another adventure with them, something to clear your mind and heart they claimed, though you did pull away just before they could haul you onto the back of a bike.

“Sorry about your shirt, Mitsuya,” You scratched at the back of your hair, your gaze darting between the wet stain on his shirt before and the dusty ground. “I’ll wash it for you, I promise.”

He only waved off your apology, lightly dusting your hair with his knuckles before herding you towards where the rest were waiting. “You smiling again is good enough for me.”

With the cheer and laughter that surrounded you almost constantly throughout what remained of the day, the niggling worries and anxiety at the back of your mind quickly melted away under the setting evening sun, the dying rays of light bringing with them your sorrows and fears. Even if the scars stayed forever embedded deep in your heart, there was nothing to worry about, you were sure about that, your mind once more building up the strength to push down the taunting voices that said otherwise. You didn’t need more friends. All the friends you needed were right here, with you. They did care.

“I can do this. I can do this.” You repeated under your breath like a mantra, attempting to steel your nerves as best you could. Going back to the mutterings and hostile looks behind your back the next day was tough, not after the previous evening’s distractions. Even if you were prepared, knowing what was coming, the first icy glare and your confidence was once more ready to crumble - this was a lot harder than it looked. But this time, you persevered, trying to allow the seemingly infinite anger directed at you to wash away with every step, though that didn’t always work. “I can do this.”

It would certainly be a while before you could walk down the corridor with your head held high, or until your self-esteem recovered enough to stop muttering apologies to whoever seemed even the slightest bit annoyed at your existence, but you were sure you could get there in time. You did have lunch and after school to look forward to now. With your real friends.

‎

Relief. Pure, unadulterated relief.

That was all the boys could feel when you enthusiastically waved them off at school, your figure disappearing past the bend of a wall as the shrill scream of the school bell pierced their ears. You didn’t actually find out what they did behind your back - they had all but thought you gone, having left in disgust. And your disappearance, despite you returning to the safety of the group, all but sealed the fact that what happened over the weekend was nothing you needed to know. And you probably didn’t want to either, your fragile self unable to handle all the nasty, grisly details that they were keeping you safe from, sheltered and protected from the harsh realities of the sinister world out there.

The threats dished out almost casually by Mikey and the beatings dealt out by Baji, or the blood on Kazutora’s hands and the crunch of bones under Draken’s. It was all for you.

Despite their intended outcome being to hit where it hurt the most, in this case your feelings and self-esteem - they did know your personal flaws very well - the sight of your face red with tears, combined with the gut-wrenching sadness pouring through glossy doe eyes, felt much like a stab to their chest. The pain and fear smeared across your expression was almost too much even for these delinquents to bear.

“First time, last time,” Baji said grimly, turning to trudge the few steps back to his motorcycle as the courtyard of your school emptied of the last loitering students, though the sentiment wasn’t exactly echoed by the others. Even if the momentary pain that they put you through was justified in the end, the means was too painful to repeat. They could only hope that this truly was a one off, both for you and for them - deep down they knew they would do it all over again. Again and again, however many times it takes to sink it into your head. But right now, at this moment, this feeling surging through their veins, it was liberating. Your real friends no longer need to worry about any of your school garbage stealing you away from them, no more.

You were truly theirs, and only theirs.

‎

Days and weeks passed in a flash, and you don’t think you’d ever been happier. The hours melted away like ice cream in the middle of summer, your time torn between school, friends and much to the dismay of the boys, work. Despite their insisting that you should just play with them, that you really didn’t have to work, you still had been taking as many errands as your limited time allowed. And any money you earned went almost entirely towards those bentos crafted specially for each member of the group that took a whole day to make, filled to the brim with their favorites, which you would have never been able to afford without the extra allowance. The appreciative smiles and the empty boxes you received in return made your effort, time and darkening eyebags all worthwhile.

Arguments and tensions within the group never lasted long with you present, easily diffusing their hot tempers and that itch to fight with just a crack of a smile or a small laugh that slipped through. Life was easier and a hell lot more fun with you around, and everyone in the group knew that.

Yet for all their effort day after day, no matter how hard your dear friends labored thanklessly trying to keep you away - to protect you - from anyone and anything that might steal you away from them, you still somehow manage to slip under their defenses time and time again. Be it a kind word to some random (scumbag, they just know it) guy, or an offer of help to a random passing stranger who looked the slightest bit lost, you could never seem to keep your attention where it belonged, and their efforts to intervene and keep you safe were far from watertight. After all, you were all just kids busy living your own lives, and keeping you within sight of at least one of them at all times wasn’t something that they were capable of at the moment.

Worse still, your tendency to wander off from them wasn’t an issue that your friends could settle with a one-off beating dished out behind your back. You were no social magnet, a known fact to all, so why couldn’t you stay in your lane? Why must you insist on exposing yourself to unnecessary danger?

‎

It was one of those sweltering afternoons - the kind where the sun beating down mercilessly atop heads was enough to redden skin and foul the best of moods - on which it finally sunk in on Draken just how reckless, how carefree you could be. What was supposed to be just a normal patrol round your little neighborhood quickly curdled like fresh milk on stumbling upon you surrounded by a group of boys, his already wretched mood souring further. Rival gangsters, Draken’s mind filled in in the next heartbeat, the eye-catching logo decorating their large backs glowing lightly in the shadows only serving to taunt him. And then you, looking even more delicate against threateningly larger figures, a bright smile on your face as you gave directions to them, which only fan the flames of his growing temper, his hands unknowingly clenching into tight fists at his side.

Of all the days for none of your friends to be free to accompany you on your mundane route, of all the times to have this very rare downtime with no one scheduled to you, it just had to be today and right now. You were supposed to be on an errand for your neighbor, Draken knew that, a simple delivery. He checked your schedule yesterday, and he checked it again earlier today. So why weren’t you focusing on your task? Why were you going out of your way to help some nobodies again, exactly what they told you not to do?

The vein that had already throbbing away in his forehead was now on the verge of bursting when you saw fit to see them off with a friendly wave, and their reply to all of your your generous help was to fucking blush and blurt out hurried thank yous. Things that would have earned them a trip and long stay in the nearest hospital, but not anything that would be suitable to dish out in front of your innocent eyes. Draken was way past pissed, not just at them, but at you. Didn’t you know how hard your friends were working to keep you safe? Were you just spitting in their faces?

“Hey.” Hand shooting out to grab at your arm, fingers instinctively tightening around flesh like they always did in a fight, though the initial harsh grip he had all but crushing you quickly softened when you seemed to jump at the sudden onset of pain, panic clear on your face as you whirled around.

“I’m sor- oh! Ken-chin!”

The fear was quickly replaced with a smile as bright as the afternoon sun above, as if you hadn’t just ruined his entire afternoon, your cheeks flushed from the heat beating down on you. And the sight of your cheer was somehow enough to calm him down from his rage. Draken could never stay mad at you for long - not you of all people, with those doe eyes shining up at him. Instead opting to toss a mask at you (one of those things that he always carried around for this sort of emergency), you obediently slipped it on without question, by now probably used to your friends’ weird tendencies and habits when it came to being out and about you.

“You ready? Come on,” was all the golden-haired boy with the dragon tattooed told you. And you unquestioningly slipped your hand into his offered one, allowing your tall friend to lead you down familiar roads, Draken making sure to escort you straight to your errand’s endpoint (a friendly old man who ran a small corner store the boys frequented) and then back home, only pausing to send off a quick text to Mikey about his disrupted patrol. His hands still itched for a pummel, but not that you knew of course, simply glad for the company, and you waved him off from the porch of your house with a pack of his favorite snack.

‎

It was only that fateful afternoon, for the very first time, that something stirred deep in the guts of your six self-proclaimed closest (and only) friends, a feeling that the boys soon discovered all of them shared. Before, with your classmates and your other little misadventures, it had been an easy fix to hoard your attention and your time for themselves. But they knew this far-from-little issue you had had always ran deeper than these surface-level interactions that they watch play out again and again - you were too naive, too fragile, too nice to live without them. Unable to stop yourself from helping any random scum you came across, unable to stop trying to find “new friends” you didn’t need and who were likely to take advantage of you and your kindness. They were your friends first after all, and they were the only friends you needed. They alone deserve all of your time and your care and your love - a finite supply that wasn’t to be shared with the undeserving. You needed their protection more than ever.

“A gang?” The six boys watched carefully as your expression fell, the mix of worry and confusion they had been expecting showing in those doe eyes of yours as if on cue. “Is that…um… dangerous?”

The night had started off as what seemed like just another regular weekend night, one of many they spent hanging out in the shade of Musashi Temple, sheltering from the light drizzle pattering the stone tiles just a few steps away from where you seven sat, munching on snacks and discussing the day’s events like you did every other week. But the mood had instantly shifted when Mikey had tried to slide the topic by you.

“Well,” Pah scratched at his ear. “Yes, but so are other gangs.”

“Other gangs?”

Baji slapped him on the back of his head, having spotted the wince Pah missed. “What Pah meant,” the black-haired boy shot the other a dirty look as he continued, though Pah simply ignored him. “Is that there’s a big gang that’s been harassing us. Black Dragons, Kazutora lives on their territory.”

Your gaze shot to Baji, the anxiety now written all across your face as you made to stand. “Harassing? Are you boys safe? Should we go to the police?”

It was Baji’s turn to get slapped on the back of his head, this time by Draken, who only tsked when the other choked on the onigiri he had just bitten into.

“No, no, we’re fine,” Mitsuya placated, tugging you back down. “But it’ll be safer for us to have a gang to fight back rather than trying to take them on individually.”

That was technically the truth, that the Black Dragons contributed to their decision - well, it was a partial truth, but there was no lie. They hated to ever have to lie to innocent, little you.

Yet at the same time, it wasn’t exactly the whole truth. Sure the announcement seemed out of the blue, impulsive even, with the way the idea was slid almost casually into their conversation. Yet the decision had already been made a few nights before on the true impromptu suggestion from Baji, and an equally unplanned unanimous agreement from the rest, away from the presence of your eyes and ears. But you didn’t need to know the whole truth anyways, just enough to convince you to willingly accept the protection of their new gang. And the night you agreed was what made the gang as official to them as it was to you.

“So does that mean I can jo-”

“No.” The newly crowned gang leader cut you off before you could even finish your question, those abyss eyes turning to fix on your gaze.

You cocked your head in confusion. “No?” You echoed. “Why not?”

“You can’t join.” Mikey pursed his lips stubbornly as the others shuffled their feet nervously, their silence only unknowingly adding to the tension they felt weighing on their shoulders. “I won’t let you. What if you get hurt?”

“But it sounds fun,” You pouted, yet they knew instantly that wasn’t the biggest of your concerns - knowing you, it was the all what-ifs running through your head, you probably thinking you could somehow stop your friends from getting hurt, stop them from unnecessary fights. The mere thought of that was enough to warm their hardened delinquent hearts, though feel-good thoughts didn’t work either on this boy. There was no standoff though as Kazutora had initially feared; you instantly caved, throwing your hands into the air in surrender. “Alright, alright.”

“So you won’t join, right?” Draken clarified, and you nodded contentedly, a light smile as you leaned back against the old wooden beam.

“You can be an honorary member!” Kazutora immediately blurted out, unable to keep the relief from flooding through his veins, as the others burst into cheers, throwing their arms around you and pulling you into side hugs, pumping the snacks they were holding into the air. The most dreaded part of this entire operation was now history, and with you behind their decision, everything else was trivial in comparison.

Now, even the duo-colored haired boy couldn’t say exactly why he had been so worried to begin with. You were you, after all, and you were happy just to be included in this new exciting venture with your true friends, accepting the honorary member status with equal eagerness and glee. Laughing as you waved away their assurances about how it was as good as being a full member, or how they just wanted to keep you safe by not involving you in their fights, or even how you would have your very own version of their uniform, your giant smile told them all they needed to know as you ruffled and combed your fingers through their hair. You seemed just glad not to be left out.

“You boys… haven’t decided on a logo yet? Not even a name?”

Draken ruffled your hair as he dug into an onigiri. “We were waiting on you, punk.”

And for the rest of the new founders, now with you happy and safe under their protection, the Tokyo Manji gang burst onto the scene like a storm.

‎

Mikey’s birthday was one of those events that you had been expecting for a long time yet still surprised you when it finally did pop up on your calendar. You had pondered here and there about presents, but hadn’t quite come to any particular conclusion as to what to get someone like Mikey - maybe a bunch of taiyaki? Everything you could think up felt simply too normal for such a special occasion, and you instead decided to crowdsource an opinion.

A humid and hot afternoon, combined with the lack of the slightest trace of wind, had resulted in a lazier and needier than usual boy, though you were always glad to indulge Kazutora during his lunches with you as you did with everyone else. Relaxing the shade of an overpass and sheltered from the brutal heat, it wasn’t out of the ordinary to find the duo-colored hair delinquent cuddled in your lap, burying his face into your soft thighs while you run one hand through his hair, humming along as your friend blabbered about anything and everything that came to mind in between his whines for you to keep up the hair stroking. But the peace was momentarily broken when he brought up the issue of Mikey’s birthday and present.

“So I’mma steal a bike for Mikey.” Kazutora announced proudly. You had to admit his idea was on the surface sound and logical - you had known that Mikey came back from one of those road trips the boys went on without his precious moped, but you hadn’t been willing to prod too much into what happened, not with how vacant his eyes had been. But still -

“Absolutely not.” You chided lightly, lifting one hand to flick the middle of his forehead and break his train of thoughts. Kazutora’s gaze instantly flew to meet yours upon impact, clear confusion swirling behind his sandy brown eyes.

“Wha-” No matter how sure you were about the little flick that hurt you a lot more than your delinquent friend, it didn’t stop the tears from starting to swell up at the corner of his eyes. You’ve never raised a hand against any of them before. Ever. So why him? “T-that hurts.”

You steeled your heart as best you could in the face of his upset, though the sight of his reddening cheeks felt like a stab in your chest. All you could do was truly hope that he understood your intention, that he didn’t hate you for what you were doing. “Felonies would hurt a lot more, I would think. You are absolutely not going to steal a motorcycle.”

“B-but Mikey needs a bike! And bikes need to be handed down to us by seniors… they cost so much!”

That was also true, yet at the same time, there was no way you could just let your dear friend waltz off into the night and get himself into unknown heaps of trouble. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if you did, and you knew that.

Yet, you still paused before you answered. You knew what needed to be done, but the niggling doubt almost broke free from the back of your mind where it had been banished. Could you really? It was a whole motorcycle - not just some handicraft you could pop into a store to get some materials and knock something out in a few days. A bike would mean the world to Mikey though, you knew that, even with the what-ifs - you found yourself speaking before you could finish thinking. “I’ll get him a bike.”

The unexpected confidence took both you and Kazutora aback. “You?” The boy carefully echoed.

You forced out a firm nod before you could attempt to backtrack at the heavy responsibility, biting the inside of your cheek. “Yes, me. I will do it.”

Though you weren’t quite done with this particular topic, the severity of your gaze unlike anything else you had ever dared level at your friends. “Promise me you’ll not go through with the plan to steal a bike.”

And a visibly frightened Kazutora quickly complied, the implication of not doing so carried wordlessly by the wind. “I-I promise I won’t steal a motorcycle for Mikey.”

“Promise promise?”

He held up his pinky finger. “Promise promise.” You took it.

Now armed with the verbal promise, the scary gaze quickly faded away - the few minutes of being that serious had already completely drained you, your fingers starting to thread through silky hair.

Tugging at the shirt of your school uniform, the flood gates opened once more as tears once more ran down his cheeks, Kazutora rubbing at where you had struck him earlier. “I-it hurts-s, I want kisses.”

“Okay, okay.” You finally relented. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

‎

You were truly glad that your friends had stopped you where they did you mused, as you rounded yet another corner, the sky above having already been dark for several hours.

Even though you had given yourself extra lead time, and with blood pumping and excitement in your chest building, the week building up to D-day turned out to be anything but fun. Well, you did kind of expect that to be fair. Your friends, probably already having guessed what you were attempting, had barred you from anything to do with Mikey’s party, insisting that you focused on your present. Yet everyday still seemed like the longest day, and you stopped keeping track of where the sun was in the sky as school and work blended together. With your phone constantly ringing in your ears, and you always being on the move, the hours seemed to drag on forever, tracking every lead you have on a bike that Mikey would be proud to own. At the same time, the days seemed to wash by like water down your favorite river, peacefully slipping by one suffering minute at a time. It was endless hell running from place to place, and the phone calls from your various old clients with tip offs kept coming.

Your routine had all but gone out the window as you struggled to keep your searching a secret from Mikey; sleeping just the bare minimum of hours at night before heading to school, followed by spending your arranged time with the boys and rushing to and fro errands, before finally being able to restart your search when the sun disappeared from the overhead sky. Under the yellow overhead streetlights that lined quiet roads, and the biting cold wind that ate at your skin, you found yourself in places that you never expected to visit; those little alleyways that wound behind city buildings, speaking with people you never expected to speak to. Thankfully, everything turned out well for you, with every person you came across being polite and kind, pointing you in the right directions, until you finally, finally, had something you could work with. An older model of bike for sure, but the engine was good (or at least that was what he assured you), and the bike rode fine. And it even came with an unexpected surprise, the previous owner agreeing to sell it to you for cheap - just fifty thousand yen, which was all you managed to save up despite taking more jobs - in return for some mild favors, which you happily agreed to.

‎

The bike was rough, very rough. Even if you did find exactly what you were looking for, the peeling leather and spotted metal was a clear indication even to inexperienced eyes just how many more hours of work laid ahead of you. You couldn’t lie about that, not even to yourself nor to the clock ticking down to the minutes to your absolute deadline. Yet there was no denying the pride swelling in your chest as you carefully wheeled your prize back to your small garage, amusement pulling soft lips up at how the motorcycle seemed to look even worse under the bright white lights that hung low from the ceiling. At least it started, right?

Retrieving a small case of tools, a heap of towels, and a beginner’s manual to motorcycles that had seen better days, you got to work. Just five days left, and at this point, you weren’t sure if you would make it.

Cross fingers.

Pulling every string and connection you had painstakingly built with every errand ran, it was still a race against the clock to get the various bits and pieces you needed customized to perfection. You even skipped an entire day of school (secretly of course, Mikey couldn’t find out) just to rush to the edge of town to pick up some expedited parts for your build. Bicycle skidding to a halt, you found the store owner seated in the doorway of his unlit shop, cigarette lazily held in one hand, a cloth-wrapped bundle by his side. Gaze rising to meet yours as you ran the last few steps, he carefully handed over your order, brushing aside the canvas to reveal its package to you. “Here’s your part. Lucky I had one spare lying around.”

Your mouth o-ed as you gaped at your reflection in the perfectly glazed metal, and you were sure that your eyes were all but sparkling when you looked up. “It’s amazing! Thank you for rushing it, ojisan!”

“Oji- hey! I’m not that old!” The older black-haired man spluttered indignantly, though the small smile he was sporting told you otherwise.

You laughed as you ran off, fuel tank cover tucked neatly under one arm, waving at the store owner with your other. “See you later, ojii-san!”

‎

A few hours later, and you were ready to throw the wrench you had been holding out the window and bash your head into the wall, the light and warmth of the sun having long been replaced with the cheeky glimmer of moonlight and the cool breeze. How could replacing a single part be this difficult? Letting out an exaggerated sigh, you instead opted to allow the metal tool to slip to the ground with a clatter, bringing both hands up to rub at weary eyes. This entire endeavour had been a lot tougher than you had imagined, and this stupid manual did little to explain what you needed to do despite it claiming to be for beginners.

“Goddamn book,” you grumbled. You did have one out of course - you really hated to bother him more than you needed to, even if the former owner of the motorcycle had given you his blessing to call him whenever necessary - but this was truly an emergency. There was no way you were ever going to figure this out yourself. Picking up your phone, you took a deep breath.

A ring, two rings, and then the call connected.

“Hey! Sorry for calling this late.” You paused, sneaking a glance at the small clock balanced carefully on the edge of one shelf. “Were you asleep?”

“If I was, I’m not anymore am I? What’s up?” Came his familiar bemused voice over the phone, and you swore you could see the twinge of his lips carried in that soothing tone. Yet despite him not sounding the least bit sleepy to you, his soft breathing accompanied by the occasional clinging of metal against metal in the background that suggested some sort of workshop, you couldn’t quite shake the twinge of guilt that settled on your chest. How could you keep imposing on someone that already helped you so much?

“Sorry for disturbing you again um - I’ll hang up- ”

But he cut you off before you could finish, the sudden rise in volume had you wincing slightly. “No!” A deep inhale, before the boy on the other end continued, his voice once more even and low. “No no, it’s fine, you’re not a bother at all. I told you not to apologize so much right? It’ll get you in trouble some day.”

“Sorry.” You couldn’t help but blurt out again, your hand quickly flying up to slap your mouth in horror when you realized what you did - you were sure that the clap of flesh was clearly audible through the phone along with your mortification.

A chuckle, and then a creak; and that was all it took to distract you from the start of a downward spiral of anxiety. You could almost just imagine the boy on the other side of the line leaning forward in his chair, elbows pressed down on his thighs, phone propped against one ear. You couldn’t quite pinpoint why the mental image made your cheeks flush and burn, but you quickly brushed those particularly intrusive thoughts aside when his voice echoed across the phone again. “So why’d ya call?”

“Oh! Um-” You startled, nearly dropping the manual you had propped open in your lap when you tried to shift backwards on the small stool you were perched on, one slim finger running down the page in a hasty attempt to recall which part of the complex text you had been stuck at for the past hour. “It’s a bit silly, but I’m stuck at changing the oil filter.”

“The oil filter?”

“Yeah, the manual only - wait,” Flipping the page back and forth failed to materialize any of the information you actually needed, and you sighed as you let the page drop. “The manual only says you need to change it, but not where it is or how. I have a new one with me, but I’m super stuck.”

There was no reply to your question, your phone instead picking up the sound of hurried whispers that you couldn’t make out, followed by a few soft creaks of metal. His voice suddenly booming back over the speaker almost gave you a heart attack, but he did at least bring good news. “The oil filter’s at the bottom of the bike, near the front wheel. Do you have a torque wrench? The bit should be - uh - hexagonal-ish.”

“Let me check,” You sighed out, turning to fumble inside your toolbox with only the vaguest idea of what that particular tool looked like. This was going to be a long night.

Long, as you found out, was in fact a generous term for those few days (and nights) leading up to Mikey’s birthday. Because when D-day finally rolled around and the last bolt was tightened into place, it was pure relief that swept through your veins, and you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything more than drag your exhausted self straight up to bed and collapse into the inviting soft bed and pillows, only pausing to switch into a clean shirt. You fell asleep before your head hit the pillow.

But alas there was no rest for the wicked, and peace was not meant to be. Because boy did D-day start off with a bang. Literally. You were jolted awake from your sleep by the cry of your ringtone, and you fumbled for the device screaming away without a care from your bedside table. “H-hello?”

Your name was hollered through the speaker, barely audible against the rumble of engines and the very distinctive, very unmistakable sound of police sirens, and you immediately sat up. “Pah?! What happened?”

There was a scuffle as the phone was seemingly passed to another of your friends. “We got in a fight, but the police were especially fast today,” Draken laughed out, the wind zipping past him making him sound a thousand miles away. “Can we hide out at yours?”

“Garage’s open,” you replied automatically, and then the roar of engines flaring up before the call cut. Thank goodness past-night you had the foresight to hide Mikey’s present away when you were done, the bike tucked neatly and securely in a corner no one would think to look at (behind a shelf of books that is). One quick breakfast later, and you were off to school, content with letting your friends hang around - it was a strange choice all things considered to attend classes on this special day, given you had skipped out for less. But you had your reasons, and your classes were spent with your head nestled in your folded arms, fast asleep behind propped up books, attempting to claw back as much of your lost sleep as you could - today definitely wasn’t a day you wanted to accidentally fall asleep on. Never again, you swore, the all-nighters you had pulled repeatedly now back to haunt you.

As it turned out, your choice of small naps in school throughout the day was actually the right one, given how you were instantly ambushed when you returned home in the afternoon, the cloudy overhead sky seemingly out to taunt you with the ideal napping weather.

Your front door slammed open, the eager figure of Kazutora already halfway out before he could finish his sentence. “You’re back! Let’s go already!”

“H-huh? Wai-” Thrown over his shoulder and rushed off to your garage before you could blink, you found yourself being unceremoniously dumped into the passage seat of a bike and whisked off to god-knows-where despite never quite having the opportunity to set your bag full of books down, your Toman friends’ motorbikes filling every of your senses even as your head whirled with your lack of sleep and the quick pace of events. Didn’t stop your laughter from bubbling up and over though, as the chilly, blinding winds that tore at your eyes and ears woke you straight back up.

Somehow, someway, the entire day’s plan went off without a hitch. Entertaining Mikey had really been as easy as Draken had said, the boy overjoyed at being dragged from cafe to carnival and back to cafe, everyone having pitched in to spoil Mikey with all his best-loved foods and activities. You don’t think you’ve seen a person eat as many taiyakis in one sitting before today, though you only ruffled blond hair when he was finished - a birthday’s a birthday after all. And when night time fell, a very stuffed gang indeed rolled up to their favorite hangout on the bank of the lazy river, where you had secretly peeled away earlier to hide your present nearby. The weather was somehow amazing despite your initial worries of rain - the sky full of gray clouds that had been threatening to pour all day had finally moved along nicely - and the full moon had emerged from its cover of clouds.

‎

You certainly assumed that you were being sneaky Mikey mused, following your back fade into the dark of the night from the corner of his eye as you attempted to tiptoe away from the group as best you could. Yet even with the rest of his five friends trying their best to cover for you and him being faced almost completely away from you, there was no way he would let you waltz off that easily - you were the safest with him after all.

Yet it seemed that his crafty agenda (or so he thought at least) was discovered almost as quickly as Mikey made it up, Mitsuya immediately stepping between Mikey and his view of you.

“Shut up, I know you know.” The lilac haired boy whispered urgently under his breath, following that up with a quick slap to the back of Mikey’s head when he failed to release you from his gaze despite you throwing a cautious look backwards. “Just play along idiot.”

“Fine, fine.” He grumbled, finally allowing abyss eyes to drift from you to focus on the sight of Pah laughing alongside Kazutora. For all his curiosity on your comings and goings, Mikey wouldn’t know what to do with himself if you got sad over your little surprise being ruined.

Turning his attention back to the group, even the whoops and cheers of the rest of his friends as they set off sparklers didn’t quite mask the sound of new rubber creaking and rubbing against pavement as you fiddled with something behind his back, though Mikey was doing everything he could not to turn around. Just a few more minutes, the boy mentally chided himself, and he was on his last leg of self control when finally, finally - the moment everyone had been waiting for.

A pop of streamers, and he was forcibly whirled around to face you and his unknown present.

‎

“Happy Birthday from all of us, Mikey!” You laughed out, the barely held back excitement clear in your eyes as you tossed off the beige coverings with a flourish. And from under the seemingly plain canvas, the moonlight scattered across the polished surface of a gleaming CB250T.

The Toman insignia shone proud, a blaze of gold that popped out against the gloss black of the custom built fuel tank, somehow catching the light of the overhead streetlamp despite every inch of the motorcycle being equally cleaned and polished to perfection. The silver of the frame contrasting against the matt black of new tires, the brand of ‘Kamikaze’ across the front of the bike - it was clear that there was no shortage of love and attention, and a healthy amount of blood and sweat no less, that had been poured in to bring this present to reality. If he wasn’t busy gawking with his jaw dropped like an elementary schooler, Mikey was sure he would instead be occupied slapping himself silly trying to free himself from the dream he was sure he was trapped in. Because how could this be real?

Dropping the bike’s kickstand to allow it to stand free, you stepped back, the surge of anxiety having you bounce on your heels, fidgeting in vain to keep yourself calm waiting for a reaction. Did the boys like your work? Did Mikey like the bike? As the seconds ticked by undisturbed, you found yourself yearning more and more for just any reaction, your gaze flittering from one pair of eyes, the pounding of your heart away in your chest making it harder and harder to breathe. But for all the nervousness playing havoc on your mind in the single quiet moment before the storm, it seemed your worry was all for naught.

“Where did you- ” Was all Mikey could mutter out in the moment, stumbling forward to graze his fingertips across the cool metal, the streak of fingerprints left on previously unmarked areas only sealing that it was as real as him. Swinging round to take a brief glance at the rest of his now-oddly quiet friends, it was obvious that none of them were in the loop either, judging from the recognizable looks of astonishment reflected back at him, with Baji looking like he was on the verge of passing out, propping himself up against the safety rail.

Even Draken couldn’t seem to hold himself back from the tantalizing glimmer of moonlight in the pools of seemingly infinite darkness, his own black eyes swinging up to meet yours in shock. “Is that- ?”

You would be biting your nails at this point if your friends weren’t as vehemently opposed to the habit - it was getting harder by the second to suppress that particular urge. “D-do you like it?”

A moment of silence.

And then, absolute chaos - an onslaught as sudden and harsh as the unexpected wind that swept down along the small canal.

Letting out the breath you didn’t know you had been holding, your worry seemed a million miles away now as you leapt to throw your arms around an elated Mikey, allowing the blond-haired boy to bury his face into your chest even while you sent a secret wink at Kazutora. You did promise a bike that Mikey could be proud of come hell or high water after all, and the relief at being able to deliver was impalpable.

“Did you steal this?” Baji couldn’t help but blurt out in awe as he eagerly yanked Kazutora off the seat of the bike to have a go himself, asking the question everyone had already been thinking. “Where did you even get something like this from?”

“It’s a hand-me-down, I swear.”

The incredulous looks you got in response were clear enough that your friends didn’t need to put it into words, you laughing as you crossed your heart with a single delicate finger. “I swear, guys! Come on!”

“Must have crossed a fortune,” Draken muttered, squatting to take a look at the meticulously cleaned engine and the shiny pipes that made up the frame. “It looks new.”

You puffed up, a rare smug smile replacing the usual adorable one. “Previous owner upgraded recently or so I heard, I got it at an absolute steal! You should have seen the state it was in, I cleaned it up myself.”

“And the previous owner is…?” Mitsuya followed up, one eyebrow elegantly lifted as he watched his friends crawling all around the new toy.

“Can’t tell you that, I promised not to say. But it’s really a hand-me-down! Really!”

The Toman founders took your word for it - this was something they would never tell you about save you try to hide it from them, but you had a bad habit for wearing your entire heart on your sleeve, and the gleeful, shiny-eyed look you had gleaming from the depths of those wide eyes in the moment told them all they needed to know. You never lied to them before, and the boys had no reason to believe you would at a time like this either.

Grabbing the hanging keys from your smaller hand was child’s play, and so was wrestling a dumbfounded you into the back of the motorbike with a toothy smile. “Then what are we waiting for? Let’s go!” Mikey roared, as party hats were quickly jammed onto everyone’s head and a helmet on yours. And off you went cheering into the quiet night, the goosebump-raising roar of motorbikes marking the start of the real celebrations.

‎

The next day, although a school day, had also been slated for the after-party celebration. One day was far from enough, and you did decide to skip class again, given it was the first birthday that you were celebrating with your friends. Though this still couldn’t quite explain why everyone decided that the best course of action to carry on the celebratory mood was to crash your house. That was how you found yourself with your friends strewn randomly, haphazardly across your bedroom floor, most of them opting for just a comforter thrown over the cool wooden floor, with only the birthday boy himself allowed to cuddle with you up in your bed, limbs tangled and face snuggled into your side. Why your house you suppose you would never find out you thought to yourself, considering that it was Mikey’s birthday and not yours. But you didn’t mind of course, not in the slightest, secretly pleased that they liked your place enough.

Or that was what you originally thought to yourself, until the group launched their unscheduled attack on you, now refreshed and determined to get answers from you on your earlier stunt. In your own room to boot.

‎

“Still not going to spill where you got the bike, huh?” Draken solemnly asked again, though you didn’t miss the mirth twinkling from behind his eyes or the amused quirk of the corner of his lips. You shook your head, only to quickly yip and try to wriggle away when Baji ran the feather you swore he pulled from your winter jacket up and down your foot, earning another round of giggles from you.

“W-wait! S-stop-p!” You squealed, and much to your relief, they did, allowing you to catch your breath for the first time in the past ten or so minutes of almost non-stop laughter.

“Gonna talk now?” Pah grinned, jokingly punching his hand.

“C-come on guys, I really-y-y - hehe - can’t tell you!” You pleaded almost tearfully, and the two boys who had been digging into your ticklish spots were already ready to cave, face with your watery eyes.

“Why not?” Kazutora chimed in, his head popping into your view from the side where he had been helping to keep one arm carefully pinned to the bed with his cheek.

“You know why! I promised!”

But Mikey had other ideas. “Guess we can’t stop then,” The blond-haired boy ordered, even as he turned his back on you to instead continue sucking on the lollipop you had given him earlier. “Carry on the punishment.”

“No waiiiiittt-“ Was all you could get out before the room once more filled with a symphony composed entirely from your hiccups and giggles and pleads for mercy, a joyful tune that didn’t fail to bring large smiles to all the boys’ faces as tears started to pour freely down your cheeks.

You still cooked them breakfast anyway.

‎

The thought of your non-answers faded from their minds as the days passed by even though they never did get the information they had been hunting for - not with the thrill of finally being able to roar down city and country streets alike together a top speed, Mikey’s new ride a fierce black and silver against the dull gray of paved roads, you whooping from the passenger seat. You had never lied to them, and your friends were more than willing to give you the benefit of their doubt this time, trusting that you really did just happen across someone wanting to pass down his CB250T. Even the registration and licenses matched up, with you having made the transfer in ownership to Mikey earlier on in secret before gifting the bike, although no amount of digging around seemed to give up the identity of its previous owner. You really did a good job with hiding your tracks, and the boys had to admit they were somewhat proud.

But despite your Toman friends hoping for these good times to never end, their honeymoon period came to an unexpected screeching halt.

“I still think there’s someone else in the picture,” The duo-colored boy grumbled bitterly, sandy brown eyes turned up at the empty sky. It was clear the incident that had played out just earlier that afternoon was still living rent-free in his head, the bite in his tone hard to miss for the other five gathered round. They knew what he was referring to, given it ran its course right after a fantastic lunch shared in the shade of an underground passage a stone’s throw from your home.

“Sorry boys, gonna have to pass for today.”

Those few words had been enough to catch the attention of the entire group, and six pairs of eyes instantly whirled round to land squarely on you. “B-but you always ride with us!” Baji protested, knuckles whitening as his hand tightened around his personalized bento box, the plastic creaking slightly under the force of his grip. Were you hiding something from them?

“I’ll let you ride with me,” Mikey offered, though even that wasn’t enough to sway you despite the bike being the same one you had poured your blood and sweat into, and you shook your head. It was the first time you had ever done that to your friends, let alone on a day as ideal as this for a ride - hot sun and a cool breeze that blew away any trace of sweat.

“It’s strange I know, but I have something I need to do.”

“I’ll come with you!” Kazutora immediately piped up, as he scooted forward to make room for you to ride passenger on his bike, patting the seat behind him. “It’s faster on a bike, right?”

But you only laughed, turning his offer down as sweetly as you always had, as if you weren’t shattering his whole world with your response. “It’s alright Kazutora! I won’t be long. You shouldn’t miss riding with the rest because of me.”

“Where’re you going?” Draken’s unusually serious gaze bore into you, though you simply waved it off.

“A small errand I have to do. They helped with Mikey’s bike, so I’m just returning the favor.”

“One errand?”

“Mmm! Just this once, I promise.” That smile you always had never fell as you hopped the few steps away from the group of bikes. “I’ll be back before you boys realize it!” And then you were gone, disappeared round the bend in the road, a skip in your step and a tune under your breath.

But your eyes had shone with the same sincerity as always when you waved them off from the porch of your house, arms laden with empty boxes, promising to prepare a snack when they returned. And you did as you promised. They weren't sure exactly when you reached home, but the hot, piping snack was ready on your dining table when they returned.

“Drop it, Kazutora.” Mikey drawled, tossing the wrapper of his lollipop into the bin behind him without a glance backwards, before stuffing the sweet into his mouth.

In the eyes of the group, there was no reason to push this issue any further with you - you told them what you were doing and why you were doing it. Besides, their hands were full as it is, with Toman’s strength swelling in size far more rapidly than they had previously anticipated. Too distracted between organizing new members and beating rivals, they were more than willing to let this seemingly one-off event slide. You wouldn’t do anything horrendous to your treasured friends would you?

‎

But then it happened again.

It always was the best day of the week when you appeared from the front gates of your school, bags of bento boxes slung over both arms.

“What’s for lunch?” Pah all but demanded, attempting to poke one grabby hand into the lunch bag, though it was quickly swatted away by Mitsuya, whose offer of help to alleviate your burdens was accepted.

You usually ate with at least one of them at lunch, but with the growing Toman and responsibilities that came with it, sunny afternoons like these were one of the few consistent times that you could see everyone together. Heading to the group’s favorite alleyway a stone’s throw from your school gates, you spread out a small blanket in the shade of the tall brick-lined walls as the boys yanked their own boxes from your bags, recognising their lunch by the furoshiki you always wrapped them in.

“Wait - fuck! That’s mine, asshole!”

One by one, the tops were cranked open, and the boys dug in. Yet even after all the various members of the group had their personal boxes, and putting yours aside on a space next to Draken, who you trusted to stop anyone attempting to have your lunch as well, you still had one box left in the bag.

“Ya counted wrong or something?” Pah-chin pointed at the remaining box, a confused look replacing the previous excited one on his face. “Ya brain turning to mush too?”

“Maybe it is all the studying getting to my head, Pah-chin.” You beamed, ruffling his tuft of hair slightly before carefully lifting the last box free and into the sunlight for the first time, the bento wrapped carefully in what seemed like a new furoshiki that none of them recognised - a crane print one with the elegant birds locked in an eternal dance on the silky cloth. “You boys go ahead, I’ll just drop this off and be right back.”

Before anyone could ask or even follow you, you were gone, leaving your friends alone and bewildered. What was going on?

You were cooking for someone else now? Wasn’t your cooking only for them? For your closest and dearest friends? Was this related to the previous time you flaked on their ride?

Judging from the irked looks being pulled across the faces of the various members, these incidents could no longer be overlooked. With no other way around it, your friends resolved to speak to you and help get your priorities straight. Even if you weren’t doing it on purpose, they couldn’t risk having you risking your safety through seeing someone else that they haven’t vetted. Or even worse, making new friends with literal strangers. You were bound to be taken advantage of with how kind and naive you were, and they must protect you from the harshness of the world.

And if you didn’t listen to them, well, that was an issue that they would deal with within their own world.

But alas, it seemed things were not meant to be that day, and the Toman founders instead found themselves being jumped by a group of delinquents in a uniform they didn’t recognise as they were steeling themselves for the talk. Already thirsting for blood - anyone’s blood at this point - their plan to corner you about your little side adventures was all but forgotten as your six friends flew into action under the shadow of the alley walls, the crunch of bones quelling their annoyance at being disrupted.

Noses were broken, guts were punched, and the newest Toman members were sent packing with their tails between their legs. Returning to a sight of the boys nonchalantly helping themselves to and finishing up your lunch, you could only bring yourself to only feel at most slightly annoyed at the empty box you returned to. Settling for just a sigh and a tutt, and sitting yourself down next to Draken so you could lean on him as support, you munched away at the sandwich you packed in case of emergencies like these as the rest laughed and joked and teased. You could never get angry at your friends.

And so life went on for you.

‎

It had been days since then, and tonight so happened to be one of those nights that Baji found himself once more unable to sleep. Maybe it was the hot and humid night, one of those where the wind was nowhere to be found and all he could feel was the sweat building up and pouring down his forehead, where even the stale breeze kicked up from riding full speed on his motorcycle didn’t seem to help. Or maybe it was the bright full moon that shone directly into his window, the light of which he couldn’t get out of his head. Whatever it was, the fact remained that Baji couldn't sleep, and even after winding up and down familiar empty city streets, he somehow found himself back on his street just further down the road, near where you lived.

These sort of nights always seemed to lead him back to you. He knew you wouldn’t mind if he crashed for a bit. A hot drink and a few of your tired blinks and yawns might be the cure he needs to rid himself of this restlessness. Maybe you’ll even let him crash with you for the night; perhaps your arms wrapped tight around him was just what he needed to sleep. The street in front of your house was always quiet at this time of the night - your neighbors were run-of-the-mill families who had work and school to wake for after all - and the only sounds that dared to break the silence as Baji tracked down the lifeless street was the flickering of bulbs overhead and the occasional chirp of crickets.

Or at least so Baji thought, pushing his bike along until your house finally appeared over the curve of the horizon. And there you were, standing in front of your house when you should have been asleep. Yet before he could call out to you, ask you what you were doing up so late past your bedtime, his voice died away when he saw your delicate hands wrapped around a helmet that didn’t look familiar, to the side of a bike that didn’t look familiar.

Illuminated by the light of the full moon behind you, Baji watched as you handed over the helmet shimmering in the night, your lips moving as you muttered something that he couldn’t hear. And then someone accepting it from you, a boy - his hands lingering on yours for an unacceptable amount of time before moving to hang the helmet loosely from his handlebar.

What was this he was seeing? What was this supposed to be? You didn’t even seem to notice Baji, one of your oldest friends, standing right here, the look of disbelief smeared clearly across his face, white knuckles still clutching the handlebars of his motorcycle even as he tried to force himself to move. Towards you? Away from you? Anything but this. Just let go and move, he screamed at himself from the confines of his mind, chapped lips mouthing nonsensical words.

But all Baji could do was stand and stare, his body frozen for reasons beyond him. And the worst part? Their eyes met. Just for a moment as that piece of garbage looked up and away from you, turning to glance down both sides of the street, but he saw, and he knew. He knew Baji was watching. The absolute bastard, who knew he was standing right there, leaned in close and caught your lips in a quick peck, before pulling away. And in that moment, under the yellow light of the overhead streetlamp, Baji watched your face flush, your hand moving up to touch your lips - in shock or horror he couldn’t tell. Or in love.

But that jerk wasn't done. As if he hadn't defiled your sweet face enough, his filthy fingers moved to run through your hair in what seemed like nothing more than a mocking copy of the heavenly way you ran your fingers through Baji's, gently tucking a strand of loose hair behind your ear. And then turning in Baji’s direction to toss him one last smug grin as that bastard finally sauntered off, bike roaring into the hush night, all he could do was watch you - with his own two eyes - shly wave off that shitstain, before you turned and retreated into your house, a skip in your step.

Toman’s first division captain was bad at remembering a lot of things at school - math formulas, geography, whatever boring words his teachers had to say much to the anguish of his mum - but this was the one thing he would never forget. The face of this lesser-than-garbage who dared to steal his friend away that was now burned into the back of his eyelids. What were you thinking? How could you associate with criminal scum? Who knows what he has done with those foul hands of his that he touched you with so casually?

Now, more than ever, Baji couldn't bear to leave you alone without them, to be alone without you, and so he forced himself to wait right there, hands still firmly on the handlebars, his bike resting on his waist. Minutes ticked by, one painful minute at a time, or maybe they did. The breeze had picked up between then and now; it was now a harsh, biting wind that tore at his eyes and tossed his hair. His brain was screaming at him to report this - the boy simply knew he had to let the rest know - yet all he could numbly think about as he stood underneath the streetlamp, white noise buzzing in his ears, was how much he just wanted to check up on you.

He waited until he could not, his bare hands freezing on his handlebar, until he was sure it had been long enough between that dickbag leave and him arriving. Your spare key was where you had always left it, where it had always been: tucked away in a soft cotton pouch behind a loose wooden panel in the wall. Stopping his bike inside your heated garage, the warmth on his numb body was but a temporary relief, his last refuge before he had to face the storm. The turmoil in his gut only grew and grew with every step he took towards your front door. Baji hesitated, his fist resting on your door for a few moments, the turmoil within him too much for just a moment, before he finally moved to rap his knuckles.

Hearing you sing out "Coming!" from up top, something about that cheerful note hit him wrong. Unable to pinpoint what it was that he felt in that moment, Baji couldn't help the tears that started welling up, even when he tried to force his indiscernible feelings back down. Was it seeing you happy with someone else? Was it your continued cheer even after you betrayed your friends for a stranger?

And it was to his mournful face that you opened to, Baji immediately stumbling in, wrapping his arms tight around you, burying his face into your chest, the tears he couldn’t stop wetting the soft shirt you had on for the night.

“Baji?” You didn't seem surprised - you never did - simply standing still and allowing him to bawl his eyes out on your front step, wrapping your arms around him, gently stroking the back of his head and humming quietly to him. “You okay?”

He didn't even need to ask to stay; you bundled him into your room, your comforting arms wrapped around him as you ushered him to the low coffee table he knew so well. “Sit, okay? I’ll be right back.” Your low voice seemed to linger in your still bedroom as you disappeared out the door, leaving Baji frighteningly alone with his own thoughts.

And you were; with two mugs of hot chocolate in hand, the two of you silently sharing a drink in the darkness of your room, with only the occasional sniffle and the whistle of wind through your open window breaking the silence. You weren't like that, was what rolled through Baji's mind, as he crawled exhausted into your bed, you tucking him in under your sheets tight before turning in for the night yourself, the two empty mugs left neatly on your table to wash the next day. You wouldn't cheat on your friends- and definitely not your best friends, he tried to reassure himself, as he wrapped his arms around you, pressing his head into your chest, your hand coming to rest on the top of his head. You were too kind for that, his eyes flickered close as your breathing evened out. So why didn't he believe that?

Sending off the nightmare scene he had witnessed was Baji’s first priority as soon as his eyes popped open, the black-haired boy guiltily reaching over for his phone even while you snoozed on undisturbed. This was something he should have done the previous night, but no one could quite fault him for this delay; the mere thought of you seeing someone else, maybe even having a boyfriend, it almost broke the boys. Panic mode, armageddon, there didn’t seem to be a word that could quite encompass the instant turmoil.

This wasn't something they expected. It wasn't in the calculations. They weren't prepared. When did this happen? Your Toman friends thought they made sure to scare off any that had even the most remote chance of stealing you away from them. Was he where you got Mikey’s bike? Was this the favor and strings you pulled? How long have you been seeing him?

Despite the emergency this new development had plunged them into, the boys had still planned for their initial inquiry to be gentle. You were delicate, and your emotions even more so; they didn’t want to scare you off by coming on too strong or throw around false accusations that would drive you away. Maybe just a few quick questions weaved in between ordinary conversation about who that guy was and what was his relationship with you. Something that wouldn’t catch your attention too much while they investigated more behind the scene. But all their plans went out the window when Kazutora, unable to contain himself, with jealousy and anger written clearly across his face and burning in his gaze, stormed up to you the next morning. “Who was that?” He demanded, though his voice quivered and his eyes started to water. “Who was that bastard last night?”

‎

You didn’t deny it.

And the dam broke, with the rest of the group all but swarming you, each bearing their envy and resentment in their own special way. But you didn't even flinch in the face of your friends' raging insecurities, allowing them to pull at your limbs and rant and seethe and pout at you. Draken and Mitsuya with their standoffish attitude, content with seething internally and throwing you dirty looks through narrowed eyes, Pah-chin and Baji getting louder and louder trying to convince you of something you couldn’t quite make out, and Mikey and Kazutora all but yanking at your arms, their silent pleading conveyed through their shiny eyes.

To a certain extent, you could say that you were used to this - they did act up like this occasionally, especially when they wanted time that you couldn’t give them. This round was definitely what counted as an escalated tantrum, but you couldn’t really blame them in the end. It was your fault for hiding this from them, and you did feel guilty. Yet at the same time, you couldn’t say for sure why they were reacting so harshly. Weren’t they glad that you made a new friend all by yourself?

“What’s wrong?” You soothed their grasping hands. “I don’t understand yet, but I’ll listen.” What was it about your newest friend that they didn’t like?

He was part of a different gang, they tried to tell you, as you stood there patiently, soothingly. Riding under a different banner, fighting for a different leader. A rival; to Toman, to them, and to you. “You can’t see him! He’s not Toman!” Mikey insisted. What if he was just using you to get to them? What if he hurts you? Couldn't you see that?

Trying your best to calm them down, you allowed them to pull at your shirt even as you ran your fingers through their hair, pulling others into a hug and into your lap even as you answered their questions. Yes he did ask you on a date in return for his help with the bike - or rather, in return for his bike, you thought to yourself - but it was nothing serious. He just wanted to know you better, and vice versa. Yes, you also knew he was part of a different gang, clear from the insignia of his bike, but he never did bring it up nor hang it over your head, so you didn't either. And no, you didn’t like him that way, and him being there was no way diminishing how important your friends were to you. Hell, you could even say outright that he was in no way as important to you as your friends.

‎

“Just let me give him a chance,” yet you continued to plead on behalf of what they saw as literal trash, refusing to let up and just compile like you always did before. “It’s nothing serious I swear. He won’t get in the way at all.”

Your street was busy as it always was at this time of the day, the rumble of cars and trample of feet as your neighbors returned home after a long day, having long learnt to ignore the mass of bikes and people gathered on the porch of your house. You couldn’t seem to understand what they were trying to tell you - it wasn’t just about the very limited time you had to spend with them and your priceless love and attention that this scumbag was stealing away from them. You - your entire self - was actively being taken away from them, and you didn’t even seem to fight it? Were you trying to leave?

“Then why?” Draken raised an eyebrow, arms crossed over his chest in his clearest sign of displeasure.

You sighed, running one hand through your hair. “It was a promise I made, and you know I don’t like breaking promises. He helped a lot with your bike, you know.”

“I don’t care. I said no, and that means no.” Mikey huffed, brushing off the hand you had resting on his shoulder.

But you were still relentless, those doe eyes of yours shimmering with hope that they simply couldn’t understand. “Come on, you guys trust me, don’t you? Just this once, please? I promise I won’t do anything weird.”

They could do nothing but watch you thank them for their concern, waving a quick bye at them before disappearing into your house, a spring still in your step as if nothing wrong had happened. As if you hadn’t just tried to forsake whatever they had so painstakingly built for you for some stranger you didn’t know. They had failed you. You had failed them.

Where was your loyalty to Toman? To them?

With no other option open to them, it seemed that yet again, they had to take matters into their own hands no matter how much they rather not have to. It was all for your own good, of course - having to interfere in your personal life hurts them as much as it hurts you, watching your face twist with sorrow when you are abandoned yet again by what you had thought was a new friend. But your naivety, which had been what endeared you to them to begin with, was getting in the way of your usual steadfast logic and reasoning, and none of your friends was quite ready to see you lose that aspect that they loved so much. But as it was always the case when it came to you, it seemed that the six boys would have to be the one to step up and protect you once more, as friends should.

At least one small mercy granted by whoever was watching over you was that your new so-called friend was also a delinquent. And that carried with it the ability to settle things their way. You wouldn’t even complain either - you never did when they fought with other gangs after all, so why would this be different?

Toman, with its expanded membership and Mikey its unquestioned head, could theoretically easily keep you under watch throughout all hours of the day, but needless to say, its founding members were reluctant to let anyone else come close to you. No, they couldn’t risk it, not when you already showed your ability to wander off from them at a drop of a hat. Even if your friends did try their best to occupy as much of your time as they could, to the point of letting you dip your toes into their world, allowing you to sit at their meetings with the hope that if you saw just how dark, how violent their world and their rivals were, maybe it’ll open your eyes in a way their words couldn’t.

And while they waited for any signs of effectiveness, between the six of them, it was agreed that they would each take turns to watch you when you were away from their side. No actions were to be taken in front of you though - you didn’t need to see that side of them yet.

“Fuck, let go of me Ken-chin! I’ll kill him!” But that vow was almost already broken on the first day almost as soon as it had begun, starting with a near miss when Draken had to physically wrestle Mikey from leaving their little hideout and handing out one of his nuclear kicks. Two pairs of black eyes had watched in utter contempt as you gently rested your head on his shoulder, as if you already felt safe enough around this absolute stranger like you were around them. And the other just…let you. No brushing you off, no jerking back. Like how your Toman friends let you. Though all they could do was continue to watch as that dirtbag picked away at the bento you had made, wrapped in that same crane-printed furoshiki they have come to despise, when he suddenly put aside the box to pull you into his lap.

You giggled - giggled - when he rested his chin atop your head, arms wrapped around your waist, allowing you to swing your legs freely from where you were perched, the light breeze tossing your hair about, content with hand-feeding the jerk, your body language screaming nothing but being relaxed in his grasp. Mikey’s face was void of emotions when Draken finally let him go, long after you had left hand in hand with that jerk, but Draken recognised the wrath that blazed behind those eyes too well. It was, after all, a clear reflection of his own.

Similarly, Baji had to knock Kazutora straight out cold before he could outright shank the shitstain running their lives, your life, after having to spend an entire afternoon observing you hand feeding lunch to him. An afternoon that you had originally scheduled for errands, time that was theirs, now gone, instead devoted to entertaining a bastard that didn’t even deserve to breathe the same air as you, let alone bathe in your gentle gaze like they did.

Even Mitsuya, the most level-headed, laidback founding member of Toman, had been all but fuming by the end of his shift, his normal calmness gone, replaced with a cold fury that burned deep in his eyes as he stormed off past Pah-chin. Nails dug into his palms and an unbearable thirst for blood raging in his chest after spending an afternoon following you around at a fair, the usually calm lilac-haired boy wanting nothing more than to tear out and feast on the eyes of that imbecile you let kiss ice cream off your reddened cheek, fingers tightly intertwined with his.

You had been their stability from the start, the hidden glue that held Toman together. It had always been you. Being there for them through the ups and downs, steadily carrying and pushing them forward no matter what happened, soothing away their anger and frustrations. Without you there, silently cheering them on when they were victorious and comforting them when they weren't, none of them could say whether there would even be a Toman. But now with the road to leaving them behind in the past open to you, the world that they had wanted to build with you, for you, was threatening to crumble.

No. None of the six needed to speak, yet the singular thought echoed through each and every of their minds. You couldn’t possibly survive in this harsh and cruel world without them. Not kind, naive you. And they couldn’t fathom a life without you by their side. The Tokyo Manji Gang wouldn't allow this. And them, as your real friends, wouldn't allow this. You simply can’t leave.

This was war.

294 notes · View notes

whataweirdfeeling · 5 months

Text

HELLO welcome back to another WAWF interview EXCLUSIVE

As we settle into a warm and toasty WAWFswinter we of course have some new artists to present

With this also being our first official collab Fraud Issue shot by photographer @wavechrist and edited by our original curator @vyngak WAWF has some gifts It must be WAWFchrist-mas

Read below for an exclusive interview and some behind the scenes moments with new artists of WAWF

Find out about all the big plans they have in store

Who are we here with?

Floaty-man, Floaty… pretty flacko jr.. shoutout to ASAP

So you would say ASAP is one of your main influences then?

Hell yeah ASAP is one of my biggest influences. I never really was the one to be like ‘I’m inspired by people’, but I was heavily influenced by like certain people..and they help me be my best self. So now.. my goal is to be better than them cause I’m pretty sure that’s what they would

So would ASAP be a bigger influence to you in fashion or music?

Definitely the music too, ASAP gave me more of the fashion tip. Like the ok to add my swag to my music instead of just trying to push my message I can also add my personality and I can also add how I dress myself and just how I live my life daily.. Regardless of what it look like I can still be on some fly sh*t

Rap name?

Floaty

Where does that name come from?

I always used to get in trouble a lot so when I used to get in trouble I used to stare.. it was the only thing you could do like.. couldn’t play the game or nothing so I would like go outside and literally look at clouds or something.. or when I was in class too I would go to ISD. ISD you get in trouble, you’d be in school but not in school you know what I’m sayin

What can we expect from Floaty in the future?

Expect a lot of shit.. I would say this cause I’m a renaissance man of art. Expect for me to get into short films. But music real heavy, fashion real heavy you know, events real heavy. But short films is what we adding to the list as well

How did you find out about WAWF?

It’s just all organic, it’s really shoutout to Wave. Shoutout to wavechrist cause you know that was the fine point it was just all divine you know. He was just telling me this is who you need to connect with and it was a wrap from there

Who are we here with?

Hello good people of the planet earth and all the other space-lings out there in the world.. I go by the name of ShowwwTimee. That’s with 3 W’s and 2 E’s

Why 3 W’s and 2 E’s

Its always about individuality and how you can express yourself a little bit differently. Plus we not tryna get sued by the actual Showtime tv network you know.. But if they ever wanna collab and put ShowwwTimee on Showtime we could do that

And on a personal note if we wanna get on numerology type time the real name is Shomari and so every name in my full name has 7 letters.. and you know what that means

Tell us about your art

The first art form is definitely film, that’s where all of the inspiration comes from. And then.. I picked up sewing over the pandemic.. It’s been a couple years now since we been doing that. At first I was making the clothes to go with the films, but now the films gotta support the clothes at this point cause I just hit some sort of momentum with the designing and I just can’t stop really. So now I gotta make my films around the pieces, make storylines off these characters that you see i’m making

Describe your fit

We got rainbow boots with tool kinda material for the laces.. shoutout Walmart on that. Thrifted sweatpants.. yellow sweatpants, primary.. We got the yellow blazer, primary and then all the other colors of the rainbow secondary. We got a pac-man tee that got chopped up and turned into a hat up top.. Pieced it together with a raincoat, a yellow raincoat that I found so it’s like a combination in there

Where would you say your style inspo comes from?

Honestly intuition, i’d say intuition leads me and then the colors.. the colors just speak and I combine the two. I find ways to combine the color combinations and different ways to piece it together

What can we expect next from you?

Next we’re gonna have to make a film for the pieces to live in and immortalize them cause yeah you can enjoy them on a day to day basis, on the social networks, but I’m really tryna get all my people off of the social networks and out of the matrix. So I gotta make my own films and put them in a place where all my people can come and congregate together you know.. something like this, shoutout to them boys down in RVA. I’ve never experienced a conglomerate of a community like this so for yall to open yall doors.. shoutout Hugh, shoutout Gavyn, shoutout Floaty, shoutout WAWF

How’d you find out about WAWF?

Honestly they found me. Likeminded individuals always find each other. That’s like soul tribe right there

Along with promoting/supporting growing artists like these WAWF magazine pushes art fashion culture and much more

Stay tuned for all of the exciting things WAWF has planned

#magazine #wawf mag #fashion #wawf #wawf magazine #fashion magazine #what a weird feeling

6 notes · View notes

kissyck · 2 years

Text

hiii besties!! it’s been a hot minute since i’ve been on/posted on here and i’ve missed y’all <3 i did some cc shopping and finally opened sims yesterday for the first time in months. made this lil simmie and did a quick edit to post! i’m going to start getting caught up on reblogging and replying to asks, sorry that it’s been such a delay! (also am currently working on some new nails *wink* *wink*) love and appreciate all you lovely humans so much <33

more in depth update below the cut for those interested :)

so i genuinely have no idea how to do quality update posts, but i guess i’ll just go in order of events.

i would say july was fairly eventful. i finished my infusion treatments at the hospital, which ended up making me feel SO much better (i had severe anemia). i genuinely didn’t realize how bad the physical and mental toll that it was taking on my body. i gamed a LOT, just had lost pretty much any interest in the sims. fall guys had become my fixation, and i had started a perfection save in stardew which also became the only thing i wanted to do. i bought more squishmallows. i got another piercing in my ears, and that same day i got fitted and met with a physical therapist so i can start the painfully long process of getting a new wheelchair. i saw a rainbow while driving home from my dad’s house. i took wayyyy too many pictures of my puppy who’s literally ginormous now, and taking all the pics of my kitties!! july ended with a mini road trip to see a comedy show, and i took pictures of clouds the whole way there.

the beginning of august was bittersweet, but was followed by one of the best days i’ve had all year. august 1st i hung out with my best friend in the whole universe before she moved 13 hours away. we’ve dealt with long distance before and talk every day, but this is definitely the farthest we’ve ever been from each other. i’m soo happy for her and am so excited to see all the amazing things she’s gonna do in the future. a few days later, i went on another road trip to nashville!! another bestie of mine was having a concert that i could not miss. plus i love nashville, so i will take any excuse to go. this trip was one of the trips EVER!! i got to see a lot of my internet friends too that i never get to see and i love them all so much. the concert was SOOO good <3 ugh i wish i could go backkkk. i also bought more squishmallows in nash lmaooo. they’re addicting. the rest of august was pretty much uneventful. i played stardew and fall guys with friends, animal snuggles bc they’re all terrified of storms and we had some bad ones, and i bought myself a fancy new mechanical keyboard (the new logitech one from the aurora collection!!) it’s so beautiful, i literally cried when i first opened it.

september was eh. i started a new animal crossing island, which i spent a lot a time playing. that and any animal snuggle i could get. the end of september was a bit rough, i was in pretty low spirits. i lost a close friend of mine earlier this year and it was her birthday. i couldn’t stop thinking about her, which was also making me think of my dog that i had also lost earlier this year (both happened on the same day). there was also some other family stuff, so i didn’t love the end of september. good things did happen though! my furbaby niece came to live with us again. i missed her so much. she’s the cutest lil peanut ever. and i went to the movie theater which was fun! also prepped for my birthday trip since we were leaving the first of october!

and now we’re in october. this month so far has been good! it started with another road trip for my birthday (i turned 23 on oct 4!) this was hands down one of the most fun trips i’ve ever been on. we went to austin for a concert two nights in a row and they were both just so magical. i dressed up fun and went shopping too (yes i bought more squishmallows) honestly that trip would have to be it’s own full post bc so much happened. have just been chilling ever since. was supposed to go on another mini road trip yesterday for a concert but pneumonia went through our house (i didn’t catch it thankfully) so that kind of threw a wrench in our plans. oh and dr. ms. taylor alison swift released an album and it has such a chokehold on me it’s not even funny. i literally cannot describe how much i love her. every time i’m listening to it, my puppy runs in and comes to listen too. she’s got TASTE :) oh and omg i almost forgot, i reached perfection in stardew!!!!!!! this is the first time i’ve ever done that and it was so fun.

#rambles #update #ts4 gif #gif tw #ts4 edit

72 notes · View notes

saucy-sassy-sparkly · 2 years

Text

Moments: Two

Note: This is very briefly edited, I keep rewriting and just need to post it so I stop messing with it.

Pairings: Chris Evans x Female Reader

Word Count: ~7.1k

Moments Masterlist

Two 2003: Boston

Years pass, old wounds heal (like broken ankles), and memories fade. As time goes on, one begins to believe that soulmates might not exist. Perhaps they are a figment of a Hallmark card or Hollywood script… something just developed to make you yearn for more. So you find a new partner, you fill the void, you keep your bed warm, and you believe this is the happiest you can be.

Some of us fall in love easily and often; others hold everyone at arm’s length in hopes that they’ll “just know” when they find the one. Some people refuse to believe that there is one perfect match for each human on earth– they prefer to believe that we can match with many souls. That may be true, we may have many ways to love and be loved.

But there is only one…

The day Annie, Y/N’s best friend, had turned 18, over a year ago, she’d walked right into a tattoo parlor, pointed at the first picture she liked, and asked the artist to put it on her hip. Six months later, she went back for a second one. By the time she was ready for her third, Y/N wanted her first.

Basketball had ruled Y/N’s life for all of high school- after that little hiccup with the broken ankle– and got her a full ride to a small D2 school. She didn’t have the grueling travel schedules like the girls at UConn or UNC, but it was enough to keep her out of the bars and out of trouble from October to March. But now that it was April and her birthday weekend, she’d taken the opportunity to miss her Friday classes, take the train up to Boston, visit her very best friend, and get her first tattoo.

Annie walked them into the tattoo parlor she’d chosen and, for a Saturday morning, Y/N was surprised it was a little crowded in the waiting area. It wasn’t a huge space, to begin with; there were four alcoves with chairs and curtains for privacy. Two were occupied and the waiting room had two guys sitting in it. They were around the girls' age, talking loudly and messing around. Both sat up straighter and made no effort to hide themselves watching Y/N and Annie. Both girls did a terrific job ignoring them; Annie because she had no interest and Y/N because she was often, still, oblivious to men’s attention on her.

Annie was called back first since her art was bigger, and Y/N went in with her to get started while she waited for her turn. In the little room, she could hear the customer next door chatting casually with the man tattooing him. His voice was deep and soothing and mildly familiar, but without a face, Y/N couldn’t place him. She stopped trying to hear him and turned her attention back to Annie until Rose, a tall, lythe goddess of a woman covered in piercings and tattoos, called Y/N to the last available room.

After showing Rose her choice, she slipped out of her shirt and bra as directed and took her position in the chair lying on her stomach. Annie joined her towards the end, watching Rose finish up and standing in front of Y/N to show her the new tattoo of a rainbow on the inside of her arm. When Rose finally sat back and the buzzing of the tattoo gun dissipated, she gently told Y/N she was all finished.

“It looks so good, Y/N,” Annie cooed, reaching out towards Y/N’s rib cage. “It’s so subtle but pretty. I’m so proud of you!”

Y/N climbed off the chair and towards the mirror hanging directly behind Annie. She held her arms over her naked breasts, turning a few ways to examine the tattoo on her ribs. A small smile crept over her face while she took it in; she glanced at Annie in the mirror. “I love it,” she turned to Rose and grinned. “Thank you! I seriously love it!”

“I hope so, that won’t come off easy,” Rose deadpanned as she moved around cleaning up. Rose started to rattle off directions for the first 24 hours and then beckoned Y/N back to the chair. “Let’s get that covered so you can get dressed and go.” She taped a bandage in place while Annie announced she was headed out to the reception area and would be waiting there.

Rose turned her back to straighten her materials while Y/N stood and finally dropped her arms from her chest while she stepped to the chair that held her bra and shirt.

Unbeknownst to her, the curtain hadn’t been pulled entirely closed when Annie flounced out. Her exposed back in her low-rise jeans was clearly visible to the four boys now gathered in the waiting area. Annie was chatting with two of them while the other two stood at the counter finishing their transactions.

Chris had watched the first girl come out of the room and immediately fall into conversation with Josh and Kevin; when he heard more female voices, his eyes trailed back towards the partially closed curtain and fell on the sinewy muscles of the girl getting dressed. He knew he shouldn’t be watching her, he knew she didn’t know the curtain was still open, but that didn’t stop him. If she’d taken one step to her right, her reflection would’ve been visible in the floor-length mirror. Chris told himself if she moved that much, he’d look away. He watched her tentatively pull on her blue bra, wrapping the straps around her and then pausing as the straps landed on top of her newly bandaged tattoo.

He watched her pause and try to play with the band so it wouldn’t fall over the bandage and when she couldn’t, he watched as she dropped the bra back on the chair and reached for her shirt instead. Her back muscles moved gently as she pulled it up over her head and arranged it at her waist. It exposed a strip of her stomach and it was tight– there was no hiding that she wasn’t wearing a bra. Chris could tell, even without seeing her face, that this wasn’t comfortable for her. She stuffed her bra into her tote back and Chris had a nanosecond warning before she turned around. He ripped his eyes away and back to her friend and his, all of whom were still in conversation… except Nick.

Nick was staring straight at him with a grin on his face, “whatcha doing?”

Chris knew he was blushing as he rubbed the back of his neck, “shut up.”

“Annie,” Y/N exited the room, her arms across her chest, and pulled her best friend towards reception without acknowledging the boys in the room, “can I wear your sweatshirt?”

“But I’m cold. I told you you should’ve worn a jacket. It’s only April,” Annie was babbling on, nagging Y/N, and not catching the look on her face. She went about paying for her tattoo and signing another piece of paperwork before she turned and saw Y/N’s face. “What?”

“I’m not wearing a bra,” Y/N whispered, her shoulders practically in her ears, her face flushed, and her arms tightly across her chest. Annie’s eyebrows shot up as her face lit up, but Y/N continued, “the band was rubbing on my tattoo, please.”

She hadn’t realized that one of the guys was still standing so close. She also hadn’t realized the double take he did when she exited the room. She’d been so focused on Annie and getting a sweatshirt that she didn’t look at him at all. She barely noticed any of the guys, she was so embarrassed and uncomfortable; she just wanted to get to Annie’s zip-up and cover herself.

“Hey, um, excuse me?”

Y/N was still whispering a plea to Annie, who, instead of being productive, was teasing her and egging her on for doing something so scandalous. She’d eventually give up the sweatshirt, but she loved watching Y/N squirm… such was the nature of their relationship. However, Annie saw him lean towards Y/N and she slapped Y/N’s arm before pointing. Y/N cautiously turned around and her eyes widened.

It was like a movie.

She’d thought about this a million times in the first few months after that weekend in Killington. She’d daydreamed about what it would be like to run into Chris: their eyes would meet, they’d call each other’s names, they’d run into each other’s arms and finally kiss. Y/N had thought about it through all of chemistry class for most of that school year.

Slowly, that daydream had faded, only to pop up occasionally after a bad homecoming date, a breakup with her first boyfriend, then her second, and more bad dates after that. Every so often, Chris wandered into her mind and she remembered the sweet, flirty boy she’d spent a day with. His kindness was not forgotten, nor was his smile or the way he’d made her laugh. Y/N knew it was silly to still think about him all these years later, but he’d left a lasting impression.

So she’d thought of what it would be like to run into him again, and she always thought it would have an air of romance around it.

Nowhere in this daydream was she braless and embarrassed in a tattoo parlor.

“Oh my God.”

“Y/N, right?” Chris prompted, attempting to be smooth. He didn’t need to ask. He’d never forgotten one second of that cold afternoon. He remembered everything they’d talked about, he remembered that she was reading Catcher in the Rye- probably for school- he’d remembered that she was wearing a green sweater and she’d gotten just the tiniest bit of marshmallow on her lip that she’d let him whip off. He remembered the disappointed look on her face when she walked away from him after talking about kisses.

He remembered how angry he was with himself for not kissing her. He’d had this idea in his head of making it perfect– that she’d deserved the perfect kiss from him. He’d been concerned about all the people around, about how to lean across her and hold her while her leg was propped up in between them. He’d been so worked up thinking through the details that he hadn’t actually done it. And then she’d walked away from him and he never thought he’d see her again.

Now she was standing here, looking at him with those huge eyes and he could hardly remember his own name.

He could feel the eyes of his friends and hers (and the receptionist, who was clearly wondering why they were all still standing in the shop after their payments had been accepted) on them. Y/N nodded slowly before whispering, “Chris, hi.”

Chris couldn’t control the grin on his face and the relief in his heart that she remembered him– it wasn’t a one-sided yearning. “Happy birthday,” he leaned towards her, “do you want my sweatshirt?”

Suddenly, she was grateful that she was leaning her crossed arms against the counter because she was certain, absolutely 100% positive, that her knees would give out under her: he remembered that today was her birthday. He remembered that one conversation, one afternoon six years ago just as clearly as she did.

“Thank you,” she stammered, both in response to his statement and as she reached out to take the sweatshirt he was actively removing from his body. Y/N kept her elbows tucked in close to her body as she pulled it over her head. In her mind, it helped keep her covered. In reality, it pushed her breasts together and made her cleavage more present in her v-neck shirt. Chris averted his eyes briefly until she was wrapped in his Bucknell hoodie.

“What are you doing in Boston? I thought you were a Maryland girl,” his voice was quiet, trying to keep his conversation from reaching his friends and Annie.

“Annie goes to school here, I’m up for the weekend.”

He glanced over her head at Annie, who was not making any attempt at hiding her listening to this conversation with her mouth hung open. The boys who’d come with Chris were making similar faces. “What are you girls getting up to tonight?” He looked back at her and her heart skipped a beat the same way it did sitting next to the fire that day, watching his eyes dance as he smiled.

Finally, Y/N glanced over her shoulder back at Annie who shrugged, letting her turn back to Chris and say honestly, “We hadn’t made a plan yet, we were going to go back and talk to Annie’s roommates.”

“Let us take you out,” Chris said immediately, reaching out to grasp her forearm in his huge hands, “I want to see you.”

Y/N hesitated; this was too good to be true. It was too easy. She bit her lip and Chris’s hands started to sweat; he was glad she was wearing his sweatshirt and couldn’t feel it. He forced himself to stay cool as he rubbed the pad of his thumb against her arm. It was Annie who spoke up, “what’d you have in mind?”

His eyes didn’t leave Y/N when he responded to Annie, “we’re just going to chill at Josh’s,” he jerked his head in the direction of one of the guys and Annie immediately turned to him and started getting details. Y/N could hear them talking behind her, but it was like the teacher in Peanuts; she could hardly make out the words, just noise; she was too busy trying to process her excitement and stamp down her nerves.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” she finally said, her face flushing red as she realized how lame she sounded. Chris was relieved; he wanted to say the same thing to her.

“Please don’t blow me off tonight. I need you to come hang out with me.”

“I don’t know, Chris, this seems completely crazy.”

“Y/N,” he said, tugging on her forearm and pulling her a little closer. She stepped forward and he leaned his head down to look at her earnestly, “I’ve had a crush on you for six years.”

“Stop,” she pushed his chest and felt some muscle under it and she bit her lip, “you have not.”

“Swear to God,” his accent was strong as he joked, “I had so much fun that day. You made me feel so happy.”

“Chris,” Y/N warned, afraid to have this conversation and get her heart broken in a tattoo parlor, “come on.”

“Y/N, let’s go back to my place for a bit,” Annie appeared at her elbow just in time, saving Y/N from having to try to navigate this… for now. “We’ll see Chris in a bit.” Y/N cringed; the way Annie said his name made it clear that she knew about him. She remembered the night she’d told Annie about Chris. He’d been a well-kept secret for several years before she admitted to harboring a crush for a boy she’d never see again. At a house party, they’d both gotten drunk and Y/N had walked in on her boyfriend getting a blow job from another girl; it led to Annie and Y/N in the backyard drinking shitty vodka and Y/N spilling her guts. Talking about the boy who’d carried her down a mountain and quite literally whisked her off her feet. This boy who popped into her mind when she allowed him, who was cute, and sweet, and had made her feel confident and beautiful. The same boy who hadn’t kissed her and left a void in her heart.

Annie had listened carefully and taken it all in, never laughing (a best friend never laughs) and letting Y/N get it all off her chest. She hadn’t shamed Y/N for still holding a crush on Chris, she’d nodded and smiled and rubbed her back and gave her more swigs of truly awful liquor before they both passed out in a hammock and stumbled home in the morning and never spoke of it again.

The girls waved goodbye, piled into Annie’s car, and arrived back at her apartment in time for her roommates to be back from their shopping trip. They sat around the table discussing the offer from Chris and his friends and agreeing that, as long as they all went together, it sounded fun. There had been four boys and, with Y/N in town, there were four of them. That seemed like a safe and responsible choice for a group of 19-year-old girls to make.

By the time evening rolled around and the girls had primped, the boys had gathered at Josh’s house with beers and some pizzas. When the conversation lulled, Josh probed another topic, “Chris, who is the girl?”

He wasn’t sure how to answer. He’d never dated Y/N, he’d never even kissed her, but he’d felt such a strong, undeniable draw to her that had lasted for six years. He’d kissed other girls, he’d slept with other girls, he’d dated other girls, but somewhere in the back of his mind, none of them had made them laugh as hard as he had that one afternoon. One dumb afternoon and he was so smitten with Y/N that the idea of having another opportunity to spend time with her made him physically shake with excitement. He’d settled on just explaining how they met and spent time together at a ski resort and tried to leave it at that; he actively avoided Nick’s eyes.

Nick was staring at him silently from his place on the sofa; he remembered Chris when he came home from that weekend. He remembered Chris babbling about the cutest girl he’d ever seen for a week straight. He remembered Chris talking about trying to figure out a way to find her and call her. He remembered her fading from the conversation but every now and then, usually, when Chris had too much to drink, Y/N came up. Nick had watched Chris flirt with a girl at a party, get her to go home with him, and call her Y/N in the cab while he tried to make out with her.

“Chris,” Nick finally spoke up after Chris had answered a bunch of questions, “are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Kevin asked.

Nick stared at Chris hard before Chris answered, “I’ve waited a really long time to see her again.”

“That doesn’t make it a good idea.”

“It’ll be fine,” Chris said, “I need to see– I need to– I just have to see her again. I can’t fuck this up again.”

“Chris–”

“Drop it, Nick,” Chris’s tone left no room for interpretation; this conversation was over. And it was a good thing because there was a knock on Josh’s door moments later.

Annie and her two roommates lead the charge coming in and Y/N walked in last, drawing her gaze right to Chris. Her grin was huge, her eyes were dancing; it looked like they might’ve pregamed a little by the way her inhibitions were clearly lowered. She was in a cropped shirt, her stomach exposed, her jeans hung low at her waist and her smile taking up her whole face.

(Author’s Note: I had SO MUCH FUN looking up 2000s appropriate “going out” clothes. I was a freshman in high school in 2003… this brought back so many memories and I laughed out loud at most of them before settling on this one).

She walked straight to Chris and draped her arms around his neck to pull him in for a hug, “hey, you,” she cooed in his ear while his arms went around her waist and held her to him. He kept her pressed against him for longer than he normally would. When she pulled back from him, he didn’t drop his hands from her waist.

“You look hot,” there was no goddamn way he could control his grin. He had Y/N in his arms after six fucking years and he didn’t want to let go. And she did look hot. That day in the lodge she’d been adorable, beautiful even, but this right now was making him excited. He wanted to pull her onto the sofa, drape her across his lap, and never let her go.

“Thank you,” her coy smile reached her eyes and she batted her eyelashes at him. Without the two shots she’d had before leaving Annie’s, she wouldn’t be so brazen, but Annie knew she’d need a little courage. Y/N tended to lean on the side of caution. She’d let a boy come to her and then flirt, but she’d rarely approach them. She’d rarely initiate, no matter how much Annie and all their friends (and droves of guys who followed her around, opened doors for her, tried to sit with her in classes, came to her games, etc., etc.,) reminded her that she was stunning and smart and talented and a goddamn catch. So, Annie had put just enough booze in her to loosen her up.

“So, we were thinking that maybe you girls would want to go to the sports park?” Nick spoke up from across the room where he was sitting with Annie and one of her roommates while the other guys handed out beers and the third roommate was playing Snake on her phone.

“Sports?” Annie wrinkled her nose, looking over at Y/N.

“Yeah,” Chris piped up with one arm still around Y/N, “there are go-karts and batting cages and mini golf. All that stuff. We thought we could go mess around for a while and then come back here.” He looked at Y/N who was nodding frantically. She, however, was staring at her best friend across the room, throwing as many pleading looks as possible.

Annie groaned, “Seriously?”

“Annie,” Y/N said through gritted teeth, “please?”

Annie rolled her eyes, “but you’re so competitive, it’s no fun to play with you.”

Chris raised his eyebrows at Y/N, “oh really? Do we have to make a wager?”

Y/N stepped entirely away from him, throwing her hands on her exposed hips, “you won’t win,” she countered, “you can make whatever wager you want.”

Chris laughed loudly, “you asked for it, babe. Let’s go.”

“For fuck sake, can you keep it in your pants,” Annie snapped, “if I have to go to batting cages, please don’t also make me watch you two canoodle all night.”

“Annie!” Y/N yelled, her face turning red. They were all gathering keys and jackets and headed towards the door.

Chris stepped up beside Y/N, wrapping an arm around her waist from behind, “she isn’t wrong. I have no intention of letting you out of my sight or my arms all night.”

If a cataclysmic event happened at that very moment, Y/N would be fine with it. This moment she’d waited for, with Chris’s arm around her waist, his breath fanning her neck, and his chest pressed against her, was finally here and she could die knowing what it felt like to be this close to him.

They’d both grown– physically and emotionally– in the six years since they’d seen each other. Chris was taller, his shoulders were broader, the stubble on his chin was more pronounced and he was clearly experimenting with different styles of facial hair. He’d had a movie in box offices, been in a few small productions and tv shows, and had two movies coming out the following year (Y/N was blissfully unaware of his status in pop culture at this point in her life) His star was rising and he was well aware of his burgeoning popularity. In fact, he was only home in Boston right now for a family wedding next weekend. He’d come home from LA to see his parents and siblings for a while before the wedding and then head back out to start press.

Y/N had come into her own confidence, thanks to basketball, and had her body leaned out. She was still in top classes and spent a lot of her time studying. This weekend was a welcome respite from her normal work ethic, but after her first season of collegiate sports, she was welcoming the break to relax and be a normal 19-year-old.

“Can we do something just the two of us?” Y/N surprised herself when she leaned into Chris in line to enter. He had his arm on her waist and she could feel the heat of his fingers on her skin. She wished she was wearing flats and not wedges– her competitive spirit was raring to go– but she’d make do. She just wanted time with Chris.

Chris pulled her closer to him, enjoying the feel of her body pressed against him, “fuck yes,” he told her, “what do you want to do?”

“I want to beat you at putt-putt.”

“Putt-putt? Who calls it putt-putt?”

Y/N scoffed, “and what do you call it?”

“Mini golf like a normal person.”

She rolled her eyes, “fine. Minigolf. I want to beat you at mini golf,” she said, exaggerating the term both times before bumping her hip into his.

He bought them two passes for mini golf; she picked a hot pink ball and he a blue one and they grabbed putters and headed for the first hole. Y/N put her ball on the tee and was about to take her first shot when Chris stopped her, “I think we should make a bet.”

Y/N pulled up and stepped away from the ball, popping a hand on her hip and looking at Chris carefully, “are you sure you want to do that?”

“You talk a big game, so I think we should make a big bet.”

“What’d you have in mind?” Y/N’s exterior was cool, coy, and collected. Her insides were burning. She knew she was good at most sports, she knew she had good spatial awareness and hand-eye coordination, and she knew that she had a shit-ton of competitive spirit. But her head was also spinning as she forced herself to display faux-confidence. She was going to be exhausted after this night.

Chris paused, pretending to think. He knew exactly what he wanted to wager. He’d been thinking about this all day: “if I win, you have to kiss me.”

Her stomach flipped in the most delicious way but she managed to keep her face stoic as she said, “and if I win?”

“What do you want?”

Y/N hesitated. She couldn’t say the same thing. She was also now feeling very torn about the idea of bringing her A-Game. What if she let him win… she’d been thinking about kissing him for years. If she let him win, if she threw the game, she’d get her kiss…

“If I win, you take me out for breakfast in the morning. Just us.”

“Wow, that’s awfully forward, Y/N, you think we’ll be waking up together?”

She felt her face flush and couldn’t stop the squeal she made as she covered her face, “ohmygod no not what I meant!”

Chris’s laugh sent a shiver down her spine and then filled her with warmth, “I’m teasing you, Y/N. If we wake up together, it won’t be like that.”

Y/N had no idea what to say. This had gone from her silly teasing and feeling in control to totally and completely out of her element. This flirting was too way over her head, she had no idea how to respond to him or how to seem smooth. Her intention wasn’t to imply they’d sleep together tonight. She’d just meant that she wanted more time with him– alone. This weekend was already almost over and she didn’t want it to pass without another chance to spend time together. She knew she could’ve gone for a more risque, flirtatious option but this was what she really wanted. Her nerves were coursing through her body as he stared at her, so she settled for flashing a smile and stepping back to her ball.

Before she hit it, Chris stepped in front of her, “deal?” He held out his hand and she nodded before shaking it. “I win, you kiss me. You win, breakfast date.”

The game was far closer than Y/N had anticipated. She hadn’t given Chris a lot of credit– something that competitive, athletic people tend to do is assume they’re the best in the room– and by the last hole, they were tied. They’d gone back and forth, with Y/N holding a steady lead for the first several holes before Chris climbed his way back.

They’d been playing winners on each hole– the person who won the last hole would putt first at the next– so it was Chris’s turn first. Y/N stood behind him picking at the rubber on the putter handle. She could’ve distracted him. She knew he’d be a sucker for her if she stood close enough, spoke enough, or stuck out her butt in his direction, but she wasn’t one for theatrics. Her competitive nature was pure and stubborn and she refused to win by using her feminine ways.

And somewhere in her, for the first time, she could remember, she wanted to lose. Dear god, she hoped he’d get a hole in one and she’d get to kiss him. They’d spent the whole game passing touches on hips and along shoulders, waiting for the family in front of them to finish by standing with their arms around each other, giggling and playfully touching anywhere they could reach.

His first putt was terrific, landing him just feet from the hole; Y/N countered with her own nearly perfect putt. The tension between the two of them was palpable; they’d both dropped the flirting altogether knowing that after this hole, something would change between them. They weren’t looking at each other, there was no banter. It was like the whole game was going in slow motion as they circled the little neon green turf, trying to stay out of each other’s way.

Before he took his second putt, he glanced at Y/N. She had her bottom lip pulled between her teeth. Chris couldn’t get a read on what she was hoping for. He knew what he wanted. He knew he wanted to kiss her. He also knew that if he won, and they kissed, he’d still take her to breakfast and steal a little more time with her. He knew that he couldn’t resist the chance to see her again. He knew that at breakfast he’d get her phone number or email address and he’d ask her to stay in contact. He wasn’t going to let her go this time.

He lined up the shot, took a deep breath, and stroked. It was perfect. Straight in the hole. If she made her second shot, they’d tie. If she missed…

“Damn it,” Chris heard her mutter. He tried to suppress his grin; he liked watching her like this. She was competitive and sassy when she was trying to win; it was incredibly sexy to watch her.

“You’ve gotta sink this if you want a chance for me to buy you bacon. Whatcha got, sweetheart?”

She was lining up her shot and didn’t move any part of her body but her eyes. She looked up at him under his lashes and truly glared at him for a moment. “You haven’t won yet.”

Oh, Chris thought, this little one does not like to lose. It didn’t seem to matter that no matter what, they both would win. There was a kiss or a date at stake, both of which were positive outcomes for everyone, but Y/N truly hated to lose. She was not a graceful loser, she was not one to shrug and say “better luck next time.” After big losses with the team this season, she’d stay in the locker room until everyone was gone watching film, thinking about plays she could’ve done better, and going to the practice gym to get in a few more touches.

She missed.

Her putt went wide and curved down a slight slope she hadn’t expected and it moved around the hole, stopping just short of the bricks surrounding the edge. Chris threw his arms in the air and yelled loudly. His shirt slid up and exposed his boxers, his red belt, and his stomach; Y/N caught herself looking at his exposed skin in the seconds before he had wrapped his arms around her and scooped her off her feet. Her hands instinctively went to his shoulders before he put her back on the ground.

“Pucker up, buttercup,” Chris grinned, puckering his lips in an obscene, over-the-top kiss while he made smooching noises.

“Right here?” Y/N looked around. They were still standing on the putting green, a group of friends was waiting at the tee for them to move.

“No, you’re right,” he grabbed her hand, bent to pick up both of their balls, and pulled her away. He dropped the balls and putters back in their little storage cubbies. He barely slowed down as he continued to pull Y/N away from the mini golf course, passing the bright lights of the batting cages and go-karts where Annie, the girls, and the boys were all in line to race, and out to the parking lot.

Chris pulled her towards the Jeep he’d driven them in, which was parked at the edge of the lot, near a line of trees that separated the parking from the sidewalk. He slowed when he got to the car, finally turning to look at her. She hadn’t had time to panic or even think as he’d pulled her out of the sports complex; she’d been too busy trying to keep up with him. He was now looking at her so intensely she thought she would explode. The reflection of the street lights made his blue eyes shine as they bore into hers. His grin was so huge she could see most of his teeth; she knew she was blushing and she also knew that she was grinning back at him just as stupidly.

Giddy was the most appropriate word for both of them. They were so excited, there was so much tension about to break in this next moment. Y/N tried not to think about how much it would suck if he turned out to be terrible at kissing… or worse if there was no spark.

They’d been moving closer to each other over the last several moments before Chris pulled her the rest of the way to him, brushing hair out of her face and off her shoulder. His hand lingered at the base of her neck and hers fell gently against his chest.

“I believe the bet was that you’d kiss me, Y/N,” his voice as low and quiet as he leaned down towards her. He was inches away, she wouldn’t have to do much.

When Y/N nodded, their noses were already touching. She pushed herself up on her toes just enough to reach his lips and press hers to him.

Chris knew fireworks weren’t actually exploding around them, but at that moment he understood the cliche. His whole body tingled with electricity as their lips moved together. He cupped her neck in his hands and pulled her closer, willing this moment not to end. He loved the feeling of her fingers pressing into his chest and his bicep while she gripped him. Chris couldn’t get Y/N close enough to him, he kept pulling her waist to him, leaning his weight against her when he felt her tongue tentatively slide along his bottom lip.

He let her tongue in his mouth immediately, swallowing his own soft moan when she slid her hand down his arm, across his ribs, and around his back to pull him closer to her. Chris walked her backward two steps until her back was pressed into the Jeep and he could lean his hips against hers.

Chris kept his eyes closed when she pulled away; he pressed his forehead to hers, their noses still touching, her breath on his face as they slowed their inhales. Y/N giggled quietly, her fingertips on his back playing with the cotton of his t-shirt. When he finally fluttered his eyes open, he pulled away enough to take in her full face: her lips were slightly swollen, her cheeks were red, and she was looking up at him through thick eyelashes with the most endearing, adorable, bashfully sexy grin he’d ever seen.

“I want you to know,” he said slowly as he let his fingers from the base of her neck, up her jaw line, and cup her cheek, “that I’m a fucking idiot for not doing that in front of the fireplace.”

Y/N laughed loudly before nodding, “yes, you are. I was so heartbroken, I totally thought you’d kiss me.”

“I’m sorry it took me so long.”

“Actually, I kissed you, so you can’t even claim this one.”

“You kissed me because I won a bet. If I hadn’t beat you, you wouldn’t have done it.”

“You don’t know that!” Y/N playfully shoved his chest, feigning offense.

“Would you have kissed me?”

She grinned, “probably not,” both of her hands were now sliding back up his chest and around his neck, into his hair, and pulling him back to her. “But now that I have, I’m not ready to stop.”

“Definitely not,” he muttered against her lips before he dove in again. They stayed pressed against his Jeep making out for another 20 minutes before their friends finally called their phones and then made their way out. Back at Josh’s, it was clear that the rest of them were ready to get the party going, but Chris and Y/N were both riding their own high and in their own little world. They sat out on Josh’s balcony while the rest of them played drinking games and stayed cuddled together under a blanket, alternating between making out and talking.

Y/N told Chris about her basketball season, and he told her about his fledgling acting career. They talked about their families, the last six years, their futures, and their goals. They talked about some books and music they both liked, some they didn’t agree on, and when Y/N yawned, he asked if she wanted to stay the night.

“I don’t mean to sleep with you. Well, I do,” he started to babble, “I just mean do you want to sleep in the same bed and wake up in the same bed? And maybe make out in between sleeping. I just want as much time with you as I can get before you have to go. Besides, the party there here is clearly going to keep going and everyone will eventually pass out here. Let's claim the guest room.”

She agreed and followed Chris in, ignoring the catcalls from their friends as they went into the room and locked the door. He gave her a t-shirt to sleep in, politely turning around to let her change in privacy– no matter how much he wanted to look– and slipping out of his jeans and shirt. When she saw his bandaged tattoo, she asked him to show her. It was a bull on his bicep; she reciprocated and lifted the shirt she was wearing, exposing her little green panties to him and showing him her tattoo on her ribs. “That was mean,” he moaned when she dropped the shirt back down and started to climb into the bed.

“Showing you my tattoo?”

“Showing me your panties,” he was in bed next to her now and pulled her closer; she slid her knee between his legs and an arm around his waist.

“If this is hard, I don’t have to stay in bed. I don’t mind.”

“You’re not going anywhere.” He kissed her hard, running his tongue against hers, sighing into her mouth, grabbing her waist, and trying hard not to grab her ass–knowing that if he did, he couldn't stop himself. When their kisses started to get too intense, she pulled back, pecking his lips lightly once, twice, and then a third time before offering to leave again. “Don’t you dare,” he told her and wrapped her up in his arms.

When Y/N woke up in the morning, it was Chris's cell phone going off. By the time he came to and found it where it was on the floor in his jeans pocket, the call had ended and his face looked strained. It rang again a few minutes later and he looked at it before turning off the ringer and shoving it back in his pocket.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” he didn’t look at her.

“Chris?” She sat up in the bed, stretching while she looked at him, “you don’t seem okay.”

He was refusing to turn around; he was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. His phone went off again and he muttered, “fuck, stop it,” before snatching it back out of his pocket, turning off the ringer, and then turning off the whole phone. He took a deep, shaky breath before he turned to Y/N.

“I have to tell you something.”

“Okay…”

“First I want to tell you that I have been dreaming about seeing you, kissing you, getting to date you since I met you. I regretted not kissing you and getting your phone number immediately and I’m not letting you out of here until I have your number.”

“What is it, Chris,” she was now standing on the other side of the bed, wide awake, her hands on her hips. He etched the way she looked right now in his mind because he was convinced there was no one more beautiful. Her hair tousled from sleep, her makeup washed off, his shirt hanging off her shoulder.

“I have a girlfriend. Her name is Jessica.”

@bellaireland1981 @before-we-get-started @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @elrw24 @maylaysia109

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fic #chris evans fanfic #chris evans series #cevans #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans x reader

118 notes · View notes