#cryptic mofos

[so-idialed-9]

7 Masterpost

Uses of 7 (and 7 in groups of 4, 7x4 = 28) by Harry and Louis. I will continue updating this post with new 7s. Updated Nov 11 2023.

Harry wore the peace ring to perform at HSLOT on September 7, 2021. The ring is seen as a commitment ring or symbol of Louis' and Harry's relationship. Some theorize they trade it back and forth when they meet up. He doesn't wear it again until exactly a year later, September 7, 2022

Louis covered 7 by Catfish and the Bottlemen, which starts out with the word Larry, in every show on LTWT22, for the first time again on the final show of the North American FITF Tour 7/29/23 in Forest Hills NY and calls extra attention to it, at AFHF 2023, and at FITFWT Barcelona 10/6/23 the day photos were published of H in London wearing the shared Umbro jumper

I Will Survive at Coachella 2 (4.23.22) was 7 years after 1D performed it in Manila - as a celebration of the Elounor stunt BUA

Harry uses his hands to display the number 7 for Pleasing and bonus! The nails are in 4 colors, 6.30.22

Late Night Talking mv has the private, real relationship as a man in a blue shirt with 4 7s on his sleeves, premiered 7.14.22

7 in the back of Louis' blue sun/sol azul tour shirt for Brisbane 1, 7.19.22

Harry scored the crowd a 7 at singing Kiwi at HSLOT Krakow, 7.19.22

7 years in the Aussie The Project interview for Louis, 7.20.22

7 in Louis' Australian Today interview - the interviewer mentions its been 10 years since he's been on the show and he responds it's been 7 years since the band toured there, 7.21.22

Harry posted 7 on IG of this bts photo for HSLOT Krakow, posted 7.20.22

John Delf’s Louis Tomlinson Changeover playlist on Spotify was updated to remove 28 songs and add 7 songs.  7.30.22

7 of the John Delf LT Changeover playlist songs are also on HSLOT’s pre/post-show playlist. 7.30.22

LT2 vinyl has 7 tracks on each side from the Amazon 'leak' 8.11.22

LT2 Amazon vinyl release scheduled for 11.11.22, 28 months after Louis announces Syco contract end

L and H saw Ed Sheeran in Manchester where Lego House was the 7th song on the setlist. All Along lyrics are "we saw Ed in Manchester, I held you while he played."

Bonus! Lego House is an exit song twice for LTWT22, and one of those times is the day HS3 is released.

Louis' Bigger Than Me promo reel features this image of 7 Louis photos and 7 28's, and Louis with a green eye. 8.31.22

Louis' friends and family referencing the number 7 on social media

September 7, 2022, Harry wears the peace ring to perform at MSG

Louis' F1 playlist released Sept 7, 2022 has 7 by Catfish and the Bottlemen and the Arctic Monkeys' 505, which had a chorus referencing 7 9.7.22

Helene Horlyck posted an IG photo with Louis and Lottie at Taylor Swift's party. It was taken post-Haylor stunt on May 19, 2015. Helene captioned it 7 year hop with orange hearts. 9.9.22

Harry's diamond ring has 7 stones

"All Of Those Voices" premieres at 7 pm local time everywhere, 3.22.23

Louis gets 4 finger tattoos, making the number of tattoos on his hands 7. 4.5.23 His two ring fingers are the 8/♾️ and pyramid/🔺️

Louis covers Arctic Monkeys' 505 on FITF tour, about wanting to get back to your lover waiting in a hotel room, even if it takes a 7 hour flight, starting 5.2023

Louis sings and dances to 7 Nation Army to celebrate his team's birthday, FITFWT Woodlands TX, 7.8.23

Z8/28 on the saddle of Harry's horse in the Daylight mv, released 7.19.23

77 days between the mv release of Late Night Talking and Sept 28, and 77 days between Sept 28 and Daylight mv release.

Louis switches up his setlist for the final show of the North American FITF tour leg in Forest Hills NY by singing 7 again with the intro "I don't want to introduce the next tune, but I don't really know how to close this without her. Enjoy the next tune!" 7/29/23

Louis sings 7 again at Barcelona for the UK FITF tour leg, the same day photos appear of Harry (from 10/5/23) wearing the infamous boyfriend Umbro shirt, 10/6/23

Louis' website is updated to celebrate Faith In the Future One Year On; the source code includes a massive 369 (made out of 3s, 6s, 9, and colons) that begins on line 7, 11/11/23 thank you to @wendersfive for the addition!

Plus let's not forget all the twisted DNA strand sunburst/kiwi clothing/checkered flag shit

But don't stop now! Bring on the cryptic numerology, drive us insane please - we love it.

At this point, with the 28 and 4 7s and 369, the only numbers they haven't claimed are 1, 5, and 0.

[blue-eyes-but-no-blonde-hair]

Ya’ll that are smarter than me better say that one of the sigils if for south florida or i might combust

[fudgetunblr]

[obeythebutler]

Hello! Could you do hc's for the demon bros where Mc is sorta like. A lizard. They stare unblinklingly, don't move much, apper out of no where without much sound or notice till it's too late. Just. Lil lizard. They're scary in an odd, eerie way, just a fuckin cryptic mofo. They,,, may occasionally hang from high places, drop from ceiling beams, just, weird shit no one wants to question because they know they don't want the answer. Like just

Lucifer: Has anyone seen Mc?

Mc: Drops from the ceiling beam

Mc, staring at him: I'm here

Does not matter what you say them. They just stare with a wordless expression, seemingly never blinking.

No one's really even if sure they're human at this point

Brothers Being Creeped Out With A MC That Is Like A Lizard

LUCIFER

He doesn't know whether MC is a lizard hybrid or they just like to hang upside down from the ceiling like a corpse...

They don't even seem to blink! Even Lucifer blinks!

One time he was walking towards the library when MC dropped from the ceiling beam and just stared at him...He doesn't even want to question why...

Another occasion he found MC hanging from the chandelier....and was worried they might fall down and break a bone or two but they crawled on the wall like a lizard...

How is that even possible?!

And even when he's scolding his brothers they at least fidget in their place, while MC doesn't even move and just stare at him...which makes him feel uncomfortable...

Lucifer doesn't want to know the reason behind MC's peculiar...habits.

MAMMON

The human is creeping him out....Lucifer, come pick me up!

MC stares without blinking for a long, long time. Once he was watching a movie and noticed that MC kept staring at the screen without blinking, without moving, like something...something...

When he came home drunk from a party and settled down into his bed for some sleep, he lazily opened his eyes to find the MC upside down, staring at him like a lizard!

When being lectured by Lucifer, they still don't move a bit! They stare back at him with a fierce intensity that makes even his brother back off...

Once he saw them hanging from the dragon in the library and they just scuttled away like a lizard...

You're creeping him out!

LEVIATHAN

Leviathan is the least bothered by their weird habits, except for their....quirk of not blinking

They don't even blink! Even when faced by scary virtual monsters and flashes! They keep staring like a malfunctioning boss of a video game!

He found them slinked over his tub like a lizard...and he walked out his room...he's too young and too shy to deal with this...

And are they even human at this point?! Leviathan doesn't want to know....

Even when being scolded, they keep staring, they don't move at all! They're giving tough competition to Belphegor....

He will tolerate them hanging from the ceiling, but please, don't do that while he's gaming....he will scream..

SATAN

Is the MC on drugs or something that makes them so...so unusual?

Because as far as his knowledge of humans go, humans don't hang from ceilings or chandeliers, don't blink at all, and generally don't act creepy.

Which MC does. Honestly, he's not even sure if they're human at this point....

He was sitting on the couch, happily absorbed in his book when he looked up only to find the MC staring at him..

But their weird habits come in use sometimes. Whenever Lucifer tried to scold them, MC just stares at him without blinking, straight into his eyes, and doesn't move at all.

They might have made for a fun mystery to solve, but Satan doesn't want to even know...

ASMODEUS

Woah, there, MC, why are you so... creepy?

MC doesn't seem to blink at all! They stare into people's eyes like nothing! How have your eyes not dried out yet, is a question Asmo asks himself every day.

They hang from unusual places like it's a normal thing to do. One time, when he was admiring himself in front of the mirror, he saw from the corner of his eye MC staring at him from the shadows...

Look, if you're going to stalk him do it the sexy way at least! 😖

And when they're being scolded, they don't even move or blink?! Even the might first-born is rendered speechless...

Asmo's questioning if they are really human. What did they do to end up like this? Illicit relations with a lizard or something?

He doesn't want to know...

BEELZEBUB

He's surprised the MC hasn't got pains in their back due to the weird positions they hang from the ceiling in....

They don't even seem to blink! Even while eating! They don't even close their eyes!

One time he was on his usual fridge raiding trips but then he saw the MC hanging from the fridge in an uncanny position...you're making him worried MC....

He makes sure to be below them wherever they hang. Because, if they fall, Beel will be there to catch them!

And when they're being scolded, they don't even blink or move, which makes the other person scare and intimidated!

Beel offers them food whenever he finds them hanging upside down though...so that's a win-win situation!

BELPHEGOR

Jeez, MC is on drugs or something?

He was lounging in his bed when he saw the MC crawl across the walls like a damn lizard...he closed his eyes and went back to sleep, because he can't deal with this today..

They don't even blink! They stare into people's eyes like some sort of monster, and Belphegor wishes sometimes they would just close their eyes and doze off...

Speaking of which..do they have their eyes open when they sleep? He's curious.

Please, MC, please, don't hand from the ceiling when he's waking up because one time he woke up with MC staring into his eyes, and they got a pillow to the face...

When being scolded, they don't even blink or move, successfully creeping out Lucifer. He's proud of them for that, but now he's faced with competition from them!

[telehxhtrash]

I wonder what was going through illumi's head after the hunter exam while everyone was blaming him for manipulating killua

illumi is a cryptic mofo so probably

[celeaakuri]

:)

Me: Oh boy, here we go, a quick and easy little meditation to tweak me back into tip top performance

Guides: It's time for an adventure :)

Me: wait what

Guides: Time to plunge deep into your subconscious :)

Me: I just wanted to center myself for a few minutes

Guides: Time to work on your deep rooted spiritual issues :)

Me: this was supposed to be casual

Guides: Oh, right

Me:

Guides: *casually throws in some cryptic symbolism*

Me: What the-

Guides: We'll give you a few weeks to figure that mumbo jumbo out lol

[uzumaki-rebellion]

“Stark’s New Intern” Chp. 9

Summary:   

Erik wants to learn all he can about the vibranium he found...

"Children of nature from another culture

Had to survive living in the light

Stolen from the center of the world

Untimely departure

Somehow survived living in the light…"

Caron Wheeler—"Livin' In The Light"

Erik held the flame from his lighter up to the smooth cool blue metal in his palm.

"You made it back!" Maria said.

Maria stood outside of his closed bedroom door.

"Yeah."

"Are you hungry, I'm going to head over to the spot for a chicken bowl."

"Nah, I'm good."

"Want me to bring you something back for later?"

"I'm good Maria."

He heard her milling around outside his door a little longer and then she left. He focused on the metal.

Vibranium.

The notes from his father's old journals could only convey the slightest bit of wonderment he imagined when he was younger. Vague memories of toying with his father's kimoyo beads and opening up a world of wonder when he activated it on his own. Slivers of images came back, images that revealed the use of vibranium in that futuristic world that his father came from. The world he was trying to get to himself.

In his hand, he held a component to deliver him justice.

The flame from the lighter didn't melt or activate anything from the metal. He could still feel the tickling irritation on his tattooed gums. The itchiness he could live with easily. Turning it over in his fingers Erik tried to figure out a way to get the vibranium into the Stark labs secretly so he could test its properties. His father's notes gave no clues as to what it could do. From what Erik could gather, it was a powerful energy source that had to be hidden. It was also an energy source that his Baba was going to use to help the diaspora and his mother.

Erik closed his eyes.

A man named Klaue betrayed his father for this metal. Ulysses Klaue.

Some of his father's notes were cryptic and also written in his own language. But there was one part of the three journals his father kept that his Uncle Bakari and grandfather had saved for him that Erik memorized by heart. Direct coordinates into Wakanda. Erik just had to find out how to use this metal to his advantage. It was the cause of his father's murder. But it would soon become the cause of Erik's rightful revenge. Against Wakanda. And Klaue.

He pocketed the metal in his pants and walked out of his room. Maria was gone and he had the apartment to himself. Making himself a pot of ramen in the kitchen, Erik thought about Stark. Was that man aware of vibranium? Tony went everywhere in the world, had access to arms dealers both legit, and Erik was pretty sure, illegitimate too. A man and his family didn't become billionaires without doing some dirt in the world. Billionaires were hoarders and they would know all the outlets to increase their selfish intake of resources. Most of their outlets were dirty. In Erik's eyes, Tony was a dirty mofo. No doubt about it. It wasn't a huge leap for Erik to assume that Tony knew who Klaue was. One thing Erik knew for sure, Klaue remained off the grid. Scant evidence existed that the man was still alive. Erik only knew that South Africa was that man's home base.

Erik went to get his laptop and sat in the living room slurping up noodles and looking up anything new he could find on vibranium. All he found were vague references to it being a rare if not fictional metal, probably a metal alloy mixture rumored to have mystical properties as a joke because of its natural glowing blue color. Small amounts were found in the arctic before World War 1 and its value was estimated to be astronomical if found in large amounts.

That explained a lot about why Wakanda looked the way it did from the glimpse he had as a child.

The fire alarm set off in the kitchen and Erik felt a strong hot vibratory shock inside of his pants pocket when he leaped up to turn off the pot of ramen he left on the stove that was now burning. He forgot to turn it off all the way. Erik shut down the alarm above the kitchen sink and when he reached inside of his pocket and pulled out the vibranium, it glowed brighter and he could feel the metal pulsing in his hand. Like a heartbeat.

Sound.

Erik turned the pot back on and let the rest of the ramen broth burn once more. The alarm gave another piercing shriek and Erik dropped the vibranium this time when the vibratory shock was too much for his fingers to handle.

He quickly moved the pot off the stove and shut down the alarm once more.

With great caution, he handled the metal again and could still feel the surge of power within it, along with the heat emanating from its brighter hue.

He smiled.

Who would've thought a burning pot of cheap noodles would help him learn an observational scientific fact?

Vibranium. The light of his father's world.

Now it was his light. And he would bring it to the Lost Tribe.

His tribe.

###

Erik worked diligently at the Stark computer lab.

He completed assigned tasks on time and kept to himself mostly. Tony had been traveling for a couple of weeks and there was a noticeable difference in how the office energy changed when he was gone. It was dull. Not quite listless, but when the head man was away, the mice didn't play, they just became…boring.

Standing at his comp screen, Erik strung lines of code together to input and received a vid screen message from Devika.

"Please come to Mr. Stark's office."

No reason was given. Erik knew he hadn't fucked up anything because Janine hadn't said anything to him directly. Shutting down his work station, Erik left the lab and headed to the bank of elevators whisking other employees around.

He saw Giselle inside the elevator he picked to take him up top. She held a fresh salad encased in a plastic container.

"Hey stranger," she said making room for him along with four other people.

"W'sup?"

"Where you headed?"

"Up top."

Erik could feel ears straining to eavesdrop as always whenever he was around.

"You have lunch yet?" Giselle asked.

He glanced at his watch. It was past one. He hadn't even thought of lunch. He'd been so busy coding and trying to get access to another lab that would permit him to test the vibranium in private. That wasn't working out too well.

"I'll eat later. Gotta see what they want first."

The elevator doors swished open and Giselle stepped out.

"See ya later!" she said.

Cheery. The day must've been going well for her.

Eventually, Erik was the only person on the elevator as he made the lone journey to the executive suites.

Devika handed him a donut the moment she saw him.

"I know you skipped lunch again," she said.

Erik ate the chocolate glazed treat to be polite. He used the hand sanitizer on her desk to clean his fingers.

"What's poppin'?" he said.

"Stark wants you to ride in the service car to pick him up."

"He's back?"

"Flight arrives in ninety minutes. You need to leave now. The car is out front waiting for you."

"Why does he want me to come there?"

Devika stared at him.

"He didn't mention any reason?" Erik asked.

Devika handed him another donut. A regular glazed one this time.

"Get going," she said gently pushing him toward the exit.

"You could've just told me on the phone or in a vid chat."

"But how would you get the donuts?" she said.

He grinned and left the office.

A sleek black S.U.V. awaited Erik in front of the office and he watched the crowded L.A. traffic as the car took him to L.A.X.

Tony Stark stood at the curb looking fashionable with his roller bag. Next to him was a statuesque Black woman with short curls and abundant curves filling out a white dress that made Erik's mouth get tight for a moment.

Erik hopped out of the front passenger seat and opened up the back passenger door for Tony and the woman as the driver grabbed their bags and placed them in the trunk.

"Stevens! Meet Athena Robinson. New addition. She'll be working in your department."

"Hi," Erik said and his voice came out with such a flat affect that Tony stared at him.

"What's wrong with your voice?" Tony asked.

"Nothing," Erik said, his voice still coming out strange.

Athena blessed him with a smile and held out her hand. Erik took it and the soft warmth made him feel giddy.

"Hi, Erik. Great to meet you," Athena said.

Erik stayed in the front as Athena and Tony sat in the back.

"Stevens, I want you to show Athena around, get her up to speed in your department. I also need you to prep for New York this weekend—" "Prep?"

"Yeah, you're coming with me to the Expo. Athena is too—"

"Janine wants me to finish—"

"Valentina will take over that project for you. Be packed and ready. Get a new suit too. We'll be meeting some new investors for the European offices and if all goes well, we'll be flying to Monaco in a few weeks."

Erik tried to process everything quickly.

He didn't want to leave the vibranium unattended in L.A., but he didn't want to take it with him to New York because metal detectors would give him away.

"Stevens?"

"Yeah?"

"Athena was asking you a question," Tony said.

Erik turned his head to look at her in the back.

"I just wondered where the best places were to eat. Mr. Stark said you were a foodie and would know," she said.

"I can hook you up. What do you like?"

"Everything," she said. Athena's eyes looked game for anything and Erik turned away quickly. She was as fine as frog hairs as his grandpop would say. He'd seen fine women all over L.A., but this one was a little different. He was digging the vibe she exuded.

"Hey this is the cut!" she exclaimed.

Erik realized he still had the radio on to the local R & B station. Return of the Mack blared from the speakers up front. Erik found his head bobbing along to it too, and when he glanced back to look at Athena, she was popping her fingers, not even caring that Tony was watching them both with amusement.

"Get into it Mr. Stark!" she said, nudging his arm.

"I'm not familiar with this song," he said.

"Old classic British soul," she said, "turn it up, Erik."

Erik did what she told him and the S.U.V. was rocking. He was really liking this woman already. She wasn't beholden with Tony at all. He was also really liking the idea that they would be in New York together.

Shit New York.

He might be able to see his Uncle and Aunt and a few homies from the DMV since he was so close.

The song ended and Erik turned off the R&B and switched to a classic rock station that he knew Tony loved. Steely Dan's "Peg" came on. Tony started rocking his shoulders.

"Wait. You two can't get into this?" Tony asked.

"It's hittin'," Erik said.

"Turn that up," Tony said.

Athena laughed at Tony as he made his hands wave in time to the beat.

"Haters," Tony said.

Erik laughed.

They arrived back at the Stark offices in good spirits.

"Show Athena around and then meet me in my suite around five?"

Erik nodded.

Stark had Athena's bags taken to the apartment she would stay in at Oakwood.

Athena followed Erik as he did the essential tour of the premises. She was impressed and asked plenty of questions. Especially about how being an intern there was fairing with him.

"Stark is an interesting dude. He can be a little out there, but you seem to have him figured out."

"That's only because he knows my father."

"Word?"

Athena's eyes lit up at his voice.

"My Dad works in the State Department. We've known Tony for a long time."

Erik kept that little tidbit in the back of his mind as he watched Athena take in the world of Stark Industries HQ.

"So, where do we work?" she asked.

Erik led her to another bank of elevators. When an express one opened, Erik rushed over to take it. Athena was on his heels. They stepped into the space and Giselle was there again. She smiled when she saw Erik again.

"Did you hear that we're going to New York?" Giselle said almost breathless.

Giselle's excited energy faded the moment she saw Athena.

"Athena," Giselle said.

"Giselle," Athena said.

No claws came out, but Erik could swear there were deep scratches somewhere from the sour tone that came from both of them.

"Athena is a new intern," Erik said.

The elevator doors closed and Erik stood between them both.

It was a good thing he did.

He knew for sure that if he weren't there, these two would probably be duking it out.

What the hell?

The tension was so thick on the ride up. He wasn't in the mood to make small talk to help ease the situation.

The doors opened and Erik was grateful to see Tony once more.

"Hey! How'd the tour go?"

Tony stepped onto the elevator and stood in front of Athena. Within seconds, Tony also caught the brittle vibe.

Erik gave Tony a look that was equal parts "Help" and "Wtf?"

"I have an idea, why don't we all go to dinner and talk about New York?" Tony said.

This was surely going to be the meal from hell.

Erik hung his head. Going to New York with two women that caught his eye along with his boss?

Trouble.

###

Tag List:

@fd-writes​ @soufcakmistress  @cherrystainedlipsbaby @tclaybon  @thadelightfulone

@allhailqueennel @bartierbakarimobisson @cpwtwot @shookmcgookqueen @yoyolovesbucky

@raysunshine78 @the-illllest @terrablaze514  @l-auteuse @amirra88 @jimizwidow @janelledarling

@chaneajoyyy @sweetestdream92 @purple-apricots @blackpinup22 @hennessystevens-udaku

@scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @bugngiz @stariamrry  @honeytoffee @meilintheempressofdreams

@tyees @eye-raq

[hayleysstark]

That scaly cryptic mofo: the white dragon will bode well for you and for Albion. Me, rewatching the show: so that was a fucking lie.

Send me an ask that sounds like a text post I would make

IT WAS THOUGH Kilgharrah needs to get his Prophetic Vision some glasses

[jakkoftreyde]

These mofos know something that they are not telling anyone.”Hey guys, let’s be cryptic to the group trying to say the world”. 

[migleefulmoments]

I'm from SC and to be fair, it's the Palmetto state. I'd feel like it'd be pretty easy to act like SC palms are LA palms. It's so weird to me that they use her as a source, nothing she says can be backed up or validated? Doesn't she claim to be a PR insider, or something like that? Why would she live on the opposite coast, in SC of all places

That’s an interesting tidbit-something I hadn’t considered.

No, her posts were never backed up with proof- she never provided enough information to make it possible to vet her posts. Here are a few from the last week of March 29-31, 2017.  These are literally all the post that she wrote for that period- aka this is the the information her followers were getting except for a thread about Ben that I left out and the reblogs.  

Nomie party (X)

You did????? When? Was I annoyingly perky or in professional mode??

That’s freaking awesome. We must have lunch.

Didn’t post the ask cause that was too many details on that party. 😂😂 already been in trouble thanks.

Glad I’m not the only one that thought he is an ass.

Anonymous asked:

You are gloating aren't you?

Who me? I would never……😇😇😇😇😇

Yeah okay maybe a little. 😈😈😈😈😈

Anonymous asked:

Just being nosey...what are you gloating about?

I might have overheard some of the highlights to a certain article and had mentioned them. The nomie didn’t believe me. 😁 guess they do now.

Anonymous asked:

Thoughts on the recent posts of the sock acct?

She seems like she has had a meltdown. Maybe she is high? Honestly not being funny here.

She is all over the place. One minute she is deleting. One minute saying his Fandom is over, another saying let’s be friends and nice to everyone no matter the ships, then next raging at everybody. Deleting even her favorite responders comment’s…

All this while insisting she isn’t able to be online. 😑😑

Anonymous asked:

You have overheard the lea's article??

More like… at the right party at the right time.

Anonymous asked:

I wonder where m is? And what's happening in the next couple days.

Couldnt tell you.

I mean in in La and in hollywood right now working. (Well not today I had a free day)

we hear different things here. Pr talk is a bit different here. Its kind of like…. everyone knows stuff. But it different than what or wants you to know. So I couldn’t even begin to answer what GA folks are being fed.

Anonymous asked:

You have overheard the lea's article??

More like… at the right party at the right time.

Anonymous asked:

When did you see them out? Details

Can’t really say where I was as it included what I was doing and with whom. But it was here after the first of the year

****************************************************************

These are typical posts she would make about her personal life- cryptic, over-the-top and full of BS. She claimed at the time that she was staying at the home of some uber-wealthy guy who was letting her stay there with the roomies and she had permission to take his BMW anytime she wanted- but she never did-she took Uber and posted about her favorite Uber driver.  She claimed she was an working actress and model for Fenty among other companies. She had an IG which was full of Fashion Nova posts where she called herself an actress, model and influencer.    

La chronicles day… I think I just live here now.

Feeling better yeah!!!!

On the list of things I never thought I’d say with such enthusiasm..

“I fought the housekeeper and won!!”

Aka I made dinner and it is full of veggies.

Because apparently some men don’t understand that I’m not 99% muscle

😑😑😑 they are acting like I demanded they be drawn and quartered. Eat the damn veggies you big babies.

Side note, you know that heifer glared at me, sighed and mumbled under her breath that I would mess up her kitchen. Bite me lady.

la life

eat the damn veggies

veggies won't kill you

Legit conversation that happened at lunch

Background. Met the rookmies 😄😄 (this just tickles me) for a late lunch before my shoot. As I’m sitting at the table waiting for them… cue ego tripping hetero male who apparently thought he was gods gift to manhood. (I didn’t get the memo) . He will hence forth be called male chauvinist jackass or Mcj for short …….

Mcj: hi babe, how you doing… Me: 😐 Mcj: I said hi babe how’s you?….

Me: I heard you I was just waiting for you to say hi miss or hello ma'am or something.   Mcj: whatever. This seat taken (as he sits down)

Fill in pointless small talk. Me mostly using one word answers.

Me: yes actually Mcj: whatever so I was thinking, you me dinner then maybe head back to my place, watch a movie….

Me: no thank you. Mcj: babe, come on now, don’t you know who I am? Me: no, should I?

Mcj: why yeah I’m on tv. Me: so? I’ve been on tv and will be again.. your point?

Cue more pointless small talk me just nodding. At some point the rookies show up and are headed over to the table. And I point them out.

Mcj: look so I’m doing you a solid, you can go far being attached to me, so ditch the gay boy band. and let’s go.

This mofo actually pulls out my chair and takes my arm.

………

So what did I learn this evening?

1). 5 inches wedge heels apparently hurt like a bitch on ones instep.   2). Apparently some dudes think this is cute. 3). Don’t piss off the gay boy band, any one of them can kick your butt and not break a sweat.   4 ). Telling a woman to get a real job after I mention why I was busy that evening is probably not the way to get a date. 5) all of the above behavior is not the way to get a date.

I’ve totally summed this up. But for the first time I was able to project anger in photos 😂😂😂 usually I have problems going there lol.

la life

some dudes are idiots

So break in the shoot for some entertainment.

Overheard conversation

“Sandra…. sandra. Bring the butt pads.”

“The lifters or the volume?”

“She has lift, bring the volume” Then heard mumbled “ she’s black… how does she have a white chick ass? She has boobs for days but no ass.”

Then… you realize sandra is walking towards yours truly.

Well ya can thank my German ancestors for that one. Don’t blame me the stylist put me in this maxi dress.

Oy vey………

la life

I'm not bad I'm drawn that way

La premorning gameshow

When your sitting in hair and makeup, wondering if you think they think you can breathe through osmosis.

Omfg. Could you have picked a tighter pair of jeans?

I’m not exactly sitting … more like reclining with style.

FYI deserts before the sun comes up… are cold as heck. Holy crap. 😜😜😜

Ugh. La chronicles .. . time to catch up .

Paying for those two days off. Make up time. Shoot before the Crack of dawn (and i do mean before the crack of dawn) and one this evening.

la life

Busy busy.

Okay soooooooko Goes from cold to….. let’s melt you skin off. 😂

On the plus side. Done til 5pm and I get to do it all over again.

Beach side this time whooo hooo.

[deputy-ajay-ghale]

So now that I’ve seen BP, I have a plot for that Shuri/Michelle fic.

Taking from that “Shuri makes a social media platform”, Shuri makes blackout, it’s basically a black version of AsianAve, but, y’know, around. It’s kind of Tumblr/Reddit-y and like Mish makes a post talking about a project she’s doing that involves tech and Shuri decides to comment on it to help her out. Obviously it does and they end up bonding over fashion and memes.

So like, one day Michelle asks Shuri what she looks like bc she has Theories™️ and Shuri’s like “I’ll send you a selfie if you tell me what you think I look like” and Shuri expects Mish to send her like “I think you have thick eyebrows, you’re 5’6, you’re always wearing lavender” but nah, Michelle sends her pictures of Mish’s sketchbook of drawings she made of what she thinks Shuri looks like. None of them are close bc the only things Mish knew about Shuri is that she has long braids and she’s black. So you have like six or so little sketches of a Shuri that looks like she could be related to Ice Cube with lighter skin and his nose and his little moles, and a Shuri that was clearly inspired by Keke Palmer with a skin tone closer to hers and braids there’s even a chibi!Shuri fite me. And besides the braids the one thing consistent is that Mish thinks Shuri is pretty and Shuri’s just “ndjdkskdkdkskdkks”. So Shuri sends her a selfie (she makes sure to change into more normal attire bc Keep Up The Impression She Isn’t The Princess Of A Futuristic Society) and a few days later Michelle’s like “bruh, I want to show you something” and sends her a more a accurate Shuri drawing and Shuri just screams in gay.

Also facts, Shuri is the person who started the “my friends call me MJ” thing. It’s a fact. It’s canon. I’ve spoken this into existence.

Anyways, it’s just them being friends over the Internet in a totally safe, chill way with MJ talking about how Queens has its own superhero Spiderman and Shuri complains about her older brother.

Fast forward to Infinity Wars time—I don’t actually know what I want to do at that point bc I’m like “mmm maybe MJ tries messaging Shuri and Shuri’s like ‘I have to tell you, I really really like you and I’m sorry we didn’t get to meet’ and MJ’s low key freaking out bc that’s cryptic as hell and now Spiderman and the Avengers are ushering NY residents to evacuate the area and MJ’s trying to message Shuri like ‘I know this is going to sound weird but that purple Powerade mofo is giving me anxiety and I wish you’d reply to my messages’ and MJ doesn’t know that Shuri’s putting her life on the line with the rest of the superheroes to fight Thanos”

O R “I vaguely talk about what happens with Infinity Wars bc it hasn’t come out yet and years pass and MJ is going to graduate from Midtown and she’s like messaging Shuri to tell her she helped her a great deal with some tech projects and MJ’s like ‘I wish you could come see me graduate’ and Shuri’s just ‘sokdkdkdke’ and uses her kimoyo beads to talk to Ross aka her second favourite American (that she’s befriended) and is like ‘you have to heeeeelp me. I have a crush on this girl and she’s graduating next week and I want to go to New York and be theeeeeeere.’ Fast forward to Midtown’s graduation and when MJ’s getting her diploma she hears someone fucking y e l l ‘YEAH GO MJ!!!!!!!’ And by the power of God and anime she just knows that’s Shuri and is just secretly djdjjdjdjd (maybe she trips, I did walking across the stage in FUCKING NEW HEELS THANKS MISTER DAUGHTRY AND YOUR DUMBASS RULES ABOUT TAN HEELS FOR GIRLS, THEY WERE FIVE INCHES AND WERE TOO BIG) about it. After the ceremony Shuri and MJ meet for the first time and it’s all rom-commy like ‘hey’ ‘hi’” And it’s just like the ending of The Edge of Seventeen when Erwin introduces Nadine to his friends and she feels so happy and accepted and liked.

I don’t know, this post got away from me. It’s still in the works.

[so-idialed-9]

LTWT jdelf changeover playlist update

John Delf made the Louis Tomlinson Changeover Playlist public again. 28 songs have been removed.  7 songs have been added. 

7 and 28! of course! not driving me insane at all! There are 97 total songs now.

Thanks to @bluewinnerangel​ for talking it through with me today and for the great resources like these and @walkinginsunflowers HSLOT playlist.

Of the 28 songs recently removed, 4 had been the exit song for a LTWT show. 4 are also on the HSLOT playlist. (7x4 = 28)

The 7 songs added were all ones that had been on the list before. 

They were removed from their original location and added at the end. 2 had been the first exit song played (Buenos Aires - Lego House, Bogota - Mr. Brightside). 

HSLOT Crossover

15 of the LT Changeover songs are on the HSLOT playlist, although I think that number could be inaccurate because we aren’t tracking it as closely.  

Jolene/Dolly Parton (LT exit song Nashville 2/8/22, but never on jdelf playlist)

Theme From New York, New York/Frank Sinatra (LT exit song NYC 1 & 2 2/11/22 & 2/12/22, but never on jdelf playlist)

Valerie/Mark Ronson & Amy Winehouse (added 2/28/22, removed 7/30/22) 

Sweet Caroline/Neil Diamond (LT exit song for Dallas, Pittsburgh, Boston, Cincinnati, Detroit, Indianapolis; added to play list 8.29.21)

We Are The Champions/Queen (LT exit song Paris 2, Milan, Lima, Istanbul, added to playlist 3/27/22)

I’m Coming Out/Diana Ross (added 4/6/22)

I Will Survive/Gloria Gaynor (added 4/23/22, after Harry’s Coachella performance)

All You Need Is Love/Beatles (LT exit song Sao Paulo 2, Dubai, added to playlist 5/24/22)

Bohemian Rhapsody/Queen (added 5/24/22)

Wannabe/Spice Girls (added 5/24/22) 

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough/Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell (added 6/6/22)

Respect/Aretha Franklin (added 6/11/22)

The Glow/DMA’S (LT exit song Perth, added 7/29/22)

Stayin’ Alive/Bee Gees (added 4/6/22, then removed & added at end 7/30/22)

Mr. Brightside (LT exit song Bogota, added 4/6/22, then removed & added at end 7/30/22)

An additional 7 of the LT Changeover songs have an HSLOT connection (Harry has a different song by the same artist, for instance). 

David Bowie: Heroes for LT/Modern Love for HS

David Bowie: Life on Mars? for LT/Modern Love for HS

Bill Withers: Ain’t No Sunshine for LT/Lovely Day for HS

Beatles: Hey Jude for LT/Stand By Me John Lennon Cover for HS

Elton John: Your Song for LT/Are You Ready for Love? for HS

Jackson 5: I Want You Back for LT/ABC for HS

Bob Marley & The Wailers: Jamming for LT/Three Little Birds for HS

[witchaotics-archive]

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐘 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓

*repost,  don’t  reblog!

𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐄𝐂𝐇

# 𝙾𝙵 𝚂𝙿𝙾𝙺𝙴𝙽 𝙻𝙰𝙽𝙶𝚄𝙰𝙶𝙴𝚂  :    1    /   2 /  3 + 𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙾𝙵 𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴  :  high/   average   /   deep 𝙰𝙲𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃  : yes /   soft   /   no 𝙳𝙴𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚁  : confident /   shy   /   approachable/   hostile   /  other 𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴  :   SLUMPED LIKE A MOFO   /  straight / stiff /   relaxed 𝙷𝙰𝙱𝙸𝚃𝚂  :   head tilting /   swaying   / fidgeting  / stuttering   /    gesturing   /  arm crossing /   strokes chin   /   ah, er, um, or other interjections /  plays with hair or clothing/   hands at hips   / inconsistent eye contact /   maintains eye contact  /   frequent pausing   / stands close   /   stands at distance

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

𝚅𝙾𝙲𝙰𝙱𝚄𝙻𝙰𝚁𝚈 :★ ★ ★ ★ ✩

𝙴𝙼𝙾𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 :★ ★ ★ ✩ ✩

𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝚁𝚄𝙲𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴 :★ ★ ★ ★  ✩

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

𝙵𝚁𝙴𝚀𝚄𝙴𝙽𝙲𝚈 :★ ✩✩✩✩

𝙲𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙸𝚅𝙸𝚃𝚈 :  ★ ✩✩✩✩

𝚆𝙰𝚃𝙲𝙷𝙵𝚄𝙻𝙽𝙴𝚂𝚂 :★ ★ ★ ★ ★

𝐁𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐘.    arse.   ass.   asshole. bastard. bitch.   bloody.   bugger.   bollocks.   chicken shit.   crap.   cunt.   dick. frick. fuck. horseshit.   motherfucker.  piss.   prick.   screw.  shit. shitass.   son of a bitch.   twat.   wanker.   coward. pussy. damn

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓?   contractions or enunciation ?  straightforward or cryptic ?   jargon or toned ?    complexity  or simplicity ? finding the right word or using the first word that comes to mind?  masculinity, neutrality, or femininity ? formalities or abrasiveness?    praise or equivocation ? frankness or lies ?  excessive or minimal hand gestures?   name-calling or magnanimity ?   friendly or blunt nicknames ?

𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

𝙳𝙾 𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝙰 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙳 𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙴 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙾𝚁 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 ? almost always   / frequently   /   sometimes  /  rarely   /   almost never

𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁’𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙰𝙲𝚁𝙾𝚂𝚂 𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙻𝚈 𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 ? almost always   /   frequently   / sometimes   /   rarely   /    almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙸𝙽𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙰𝚃𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? almost always   /   frequently   /   sometimes/   rarely /   almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? almost always  /   frequently   / sometimes /   rarely /  almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ‘𝚆𝙷𝙾𝙼’ 𝙸𝙽 𝙰 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 ? yes /   no   /   only ironically

𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚆𝙰𝙽𝚃𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙰 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃.  𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 𝙳𝙾 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ? but /   though   /   although   /   however   /   perhaps  /  mayhaps

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? walk away   /   ask if that’s everything   /   say that that’s everything  /   give a proper goodbye  /   tell their company they’re done here   /   remain quiet  /  they don’t

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙰𝙳𝙳𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 ? titles  / first names  /   surnames /  full names  /   nicknames

𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚂𝙾𝙲𝙸𝙰𝙻 𝙲𝙻𝙰𝚂𝚂 𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 𝙰𝚂𝚂𝚄𝙼𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙾𝙽𝙶𝚂 𝚃𝙾,  𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙼 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 ? upper / middle  /   working   /  lower

𝙸𝙽 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙰𝚈 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙾𝚄𝚃 𝚃𝙾 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 ? accent   /   vocabulary   /   tone /   level   /  politeness /   brusqueness   / it doesn’t

[putastakeinit]

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐘 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓

*repost,  don’t  reblog!

𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐄𝐂𝐇

# 𝙾𝙵 𝚂𝙿𝙾𝙺𝙴𝙽 𝙻𝙰𝙽𝙶𝚄𝙰𝙶𝙴𝚂  :    1    /   2 /  3 + 𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙾𝙵 𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴  :  high/   average   /   deep 𝙰𝙲𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃  :no /   soft   /   no 𝙳𝙴𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚁  : confident /   shy   /   approachable/   hostile   /  other 𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴  :   SLUMPED LIKE A MOFO   /  straight / stiff /   relaxed 𝙷𝙰𝙱𝙸𝚃𝚂  :   head tilting /   swaying   / fidgeting  / stuttering   /    gesturing   /  arm crossing /   strokes chin   /   ah, er, um, or other interjections /  plays with hair or clothing/   hands at hips   / inconsistent eye contact /   maintains eye contact  /   frequent pausing   / stands close   /   stands at distance

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

𝚅𝙾𝙲𝙰𝙱𝚄𝙻𝙰𝚁𝚈 :★ ★ ★ ★ ✩

𝙴𝙼𝙾𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 :★ ★ ★ ✩ ✩

𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝚁𝚄𝙲𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴 :★ ★ ★ ✩✩

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘  :

𝙵𝚁𝙴𝚀𝚄𝙴𝙽𝙲𝚈 :★ ★ ★ ★ ★

𝙲𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙸𝚅𝙸𝚃𝚈 :  ★ ★ ★ ★ ✩

𝚆𝙰𝚃𝙲𝙷𝙵𝚄𝙻𝙽𝙴𝚂𝚂 :★ ★ ★✩✩

𝐁𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐘.    arse.   ass.   asshole. bastard. bitch.   bloody.   bugger.   bollocks.   chicken shit.   crap.   cunt.   dick. frick. fuck. horseshit.   motherfucker.  piss.   prick.   screw.  shit. shitass.   son of a bitch.   twat.   wanker.   coward. pussy.

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓?   contractions or enunciation ?  straightforward or cryptic ?   jargon or toned ?    complexity  or simplicity ? finding the right word or using the first word that comes to mind?  masculinity, neutrality, or femininity ? formalities or abrasiveness?    praise or equivocation ? frankness or lies ?  excessive or minimal hand gestures?   name-calling or magnanimity ?   friendly or blunt nicknames ?

𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

𝙳𝙾 𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝙰 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙳 𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙴 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙾𝚁 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 ? almost always   / frequently   /   sometimes  /  rarely   /   almost never

𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁’𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙰𝙲𝚁𝙾𝚂𝚂 𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙻𝚈 𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 ? almost always   /   frequently   / sometimes   /   rarely   /    almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙸𝙽𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙰𝚃𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? almost always   /   frequently   /   sometimes/   rarely /   almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? almost always  /   frequently   / sometimes /   rarely /  almost never

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ‘𝚆𝙷𝙾𝙼’ 𝙸𝙽 𝙰 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 ? yes /   no   /   only ironically

𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚆𝙰𝙽𝚃𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙰 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃.  𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 𝙳𝙾 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ? but /   though   /   although   /   however   /   perhaps  /  mayhaps

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 ? walk away   /   ask if that’s everything   /   say that that’s everything  /   give a proper goodbye  /   tell their company they’re done here   /   remain quiet  /  they don’t

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙰𝙳𝙳𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 ? titles  / first names  /   surnames /  full names  /   nicknames

𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚂𝙾𝙲𝙸𝙰𝙻 𝙲𝙻𝙰𝚂𝚂 𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 𝙰𝚂𝚂𝚄𝙼𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙾𝙽𝙶𝚂 𝚃𝙾,  𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙼 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 ? upper / middle  /   working   /  lower

𝙸𝙽 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙰𝚈 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙾𝚄𝚃 𝚃𝙾 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 ? accent   /   vocabulary   /   tone /   level   /  politeness /   brusqueness   / it doesn’t

[russellthornton]

What Is A MILF? The Surprising Truths & Thoughts Behind Its Meaning

‘MILF’ is code for Mother I’d Like To Fuck. But there’s really much, much more to it. Here’s a unique take on what is a MILF exactly.

If you’re a dude you’ve probably used this term more times than you care to admit. Walking down the street with your boy, you see an unusually attractive older lady and you’re like, ‘Bro, check out that MILF.’ But if you’re wondering, what is a MILF, it’s time to educate yourself.

What is a MILF?

It’s just one of those words we like to say. It rolls off the tongue like sweet honey… Sometimes we say it for humor. Other times the word MILF is just… definitive. The truth. There’s even a male equivalent—‘DILF’, which is code for Dad I’d Like To Fuck.

Primarily, being a MILF/DILF means you’re older but still look remarkably attractive. MILF is sort of similar to the term cougar, which is a woman who is independent, older, and likes her meat younger.

But MILF/DILF are different in that those terms suggest you have parenting responsibilities. Which could also suggest you’re in a committed relationship… [Read: How to make an older woman fall in love with you]

Which is why the term MILF feels kind of taboo

Let’s take it back…

#1 ‘You low-down Mother Fuckers.’

– US soldier to his draft board, 1911

#2 ‘You see this cat, Shaft is a bad mother

(Shut your mouth)

But I’m talking about Shaft

(Then we can dig it)’

– Isaac Hayes in his song ‘Shaft’, 1971

Another controversial term: ‘Mother fucker’ was used as early as the late 19th century. But throughout the years, mother fucker was softened into minced oaths such as:

– Motherfugger

– Mother for you

– MOFO

The cool thing about this word is that you can’t say it, and even when you do you’re expected to make it cryptic. Unless you really don’t give a fuck and want to make your feelings clear… *‘Mother fucker, I dare ya! NO, I double dare ya!’*.

The funny thing is most people don’t think about ‘mother fucker’ in terms of actually having sex with a mother. Counter-intuitively, they associate it with awesomeness OR sometimes with offensiveness. [Read: What’s in it for the older woman dating the younger man?]

‘That movie was mother fucking amazing.’

Or

‘Yeah, well, fuck you, you dumb mother fucker.’

THEN the internet hit and these things happened…

– Lots and lots of porn

– Lots of sexualized material on TV/movies/media

– Even more sex on social media, which popularized acronyms for sex like: mofo, ons, dtf, bdsm, bbw…

– Lots of new dating sites/apps that made dating/sex a whole different ballgame

– Everything became a candidate for ‘LOL cool’, e.g. Stiffler’s mum in American Pie

This is why I think the word MILF is sort of an evolution of the phrase mother fucker. However, it’s also a very unique and ultra-modern word. Let’s take a deeper dive into its meaning…

#1 Milf is short-code. People need short codes to speedily distinguish between categories of things in the world. MILF generally makes it clear that the mentioned person is an older woman.

If I’m with a buddy on a crowded street and want to let them know about an older lady with a gorgeous look, I’ll say, ‘MILF dead ahead, 8 out of 10.’ He knows to skip over the faces under 30 and search for the hot 35+ year old. It’s simply a matter of critical timing. [Read: You guide to scoring yourself a MILF]

#2 A MILF is the wet dream. Teenagers going through puberty may be unable to attract or connect with girls their own age. For example, an adolescent who spends too much time watching porn and doesn’t have good social skills…

Due to his inexperience, he might naturally be drawn to a more maternal, nurturing figure—thinking she will mother him up unconditionally and acceptingly.

#3 A MILF is emotionally developed. Maybe you’re bored of club life and people with stringy attention spans. You want more depth. You can find depth in young people, but many higher order character traits take a lifetime to build. And it’s a never-ending journey. So, some people will consider a person to be a MILF if they meet the emotional connection criteria.

#4 A MILF is very cute or hot. There’s a somewhat universal attractiveness level spectrum, whether or not we like to admit it. In other words, people can generally agree on whether someone looks attractive or not and roughly what level of attractive they look, even if they’re not specifically ‘their type.’

This might sound controversial, but if you’re honest with yourself you may agree *ever heard the phrase ‘she’s out of his league’?*.

Things like facial details symmetry and body shape all factor in. And with that said, some people age better than others and stay looking attractive for longer. Which means that they stay looking remarkably attractive for longer. Note that the word GILF *for grandmother* isn’t popular, because there’s less chances a woman will stay looking hot at that stage of her life *although there are many exceptions*. [Read: The 30 traits of hot women that men love]

#5 The MILF is a new kind of woman. Women had massive inequality pre-world wars. Post-world wars, they slowly gained more rights. Today they’re more on an equal footing with men societally than they have been in any other time. In some arenas, such as within education, they outperform guys. It’s no longer a given that a woman’s role in society is to get married and to have children by a particular age.

Customs are unclear—more open-ended. Women have more independence and make their own sexual decisions with less social repercussions. Words like MILF pop into existence in times like this. People aren’t so sure that an older lady is probably someone else’s wife or that she won’t be DTF. [Read: The meaning of DTF and signs she’s feeling it]

#6 The MILF is straight to the point. Being messed around by a 22-year-old Colombian chick who doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going? One of the appeals of MILFs is that they don’t play games with you.

It’s a popular belief that if a MILF doesn’t feel you she won’t take your info or reply to your messages. But if she is into you she really means to follow through and may even initiate things, because she’s confident enough in her own skin and knows what she wants *she probably also works out if you’re the real deal faster*. [Read: The pros and cons of dating a woman in control]

#7 A MILF might not be a mother. I’ve never been walking with a friend and we see a hot older lady and my friend says: ‘That is either a hot MILF or a hot cougar.’ He probably doesn’t care if she’s mothered offspring. What’s important is that she looks like she could mother offspring.

We’re usually attracted to people that look capable of passing on genes to create healthy offspring. When we notice curvaceous hips or a buxom chest, this is us looking out for signs of genetic health. The hips don’t lie.

#8 The 20-year-old MILF? Of course, a woman in her 20s could be a MILF. But you often hear ‘baby mother’ used more in that situation. A MILF is a bit more like a fine wine… something that takes a given amount of time to develop properly.

Though I saw a girl who was 22 and had a toddler. It was the first time I’d dated a mother, and I definitely used MILF more than a few times.

#9 The 30-35 MILF. A popular MILF imagery is the ‘dirty 30s’ MILF who is sexually ravenous or a recently divorced single mum. She’s rediscovering who she is and is going yolo. She may be dating several guys at the same time and looking for completely no strings attached sex. [Read: 17 important guidelines for NSA sex]

#10 The conqueror’s trophy MILF. To get with one, you may need to be direct. You should also know what you want. She’s seen too much in her time to be won over by timidity. To add to this, she’s not a commonly ‘available’ demography. Think about it this way: the market tends to value things based on supply and demand. So, if something is in high demand, but seems to be in relatively short supply, it’s going to increase in value.

There are simply fewer older and hot women still dating compared to younger women. So, this literally makes MILFs a hot product. And hunters of MILFs get a sense of self-validation from knowing they won something difficult to get. It’s competition.

Say you’re 20, and a MILF you come across is 45. Chances are it’s less socially acceptable for her to get with you. There’s more in your way in terms of natural social obstacles. So, if you proceed to get her despite this, it says something about your tenacity and abilities.

#11 A MILF can have dirty affairs. I think being a parent tends to make you mature sooner, both emotionally and spiritually, whatever your age. This is because of the higher amount responsibility you bear. When a MILF does anything she does it properly. That means a sweeping, mature, lusty affair. By comparison, a ‘baby mother’ is more likely to bring drama and angry ex-lovers who carry guns. This is simply because younger people generally have less life experience than older folk.

By the time you’re in your 30s you’ll have more perspective on some of life’s absurdities. So, a MILF is more likely to have emotional control and able to keep a dirty secret. [Read: 15 dirty ways to have the sexiest rough sex ever]

#12 A MILF understands sex and sexuality. Think of a hot 20-year-old girl… It’s not hard to get the feeling that her body as it is just popped into existence one day and she woke up with an uber-slim waste line and a perky bubble butt. She didn’t go to the gym for it. She might even have a diet of cigarettes and Coca-Cola.

The same thing is likely to be the case with that girl’s sense of her own sexuality. She’s not matured fully yet. She doesn’t yet know what she likes and enjoys, or what she really appreciates in a partner.

A MILF’s sexuality is practiced. It’s deep, subtle, knowing. She truly appreciates sexuality to a level that shocks you. A MILF may dress modestly and show her sexuality in subtle ways. Her sexuality may seem to emanate from her sleekly and stylishly. However, when you make a moment of intense eye contact with a MILF, there’s a knowingness there.

Don’t get me wrong, people can be impulsive and naïve whatever their age, but wisdom and skills generally tend to form with time.

[Read: Cougar dating: 10 rules to dating an older woman]

Hunters like to explore. They know that variety is the spice of life. Understanding what is a MILF and the slightly taboo off-limits temptation can only be addressed in a socially acceptable way through code.

The post What Is A MILF? The Surprising Truths & Thoughts Behind Its Meaning is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

[a-baleful-howl]

While I have weird feelings about Jon and Sansa's scenes from 7.01 ... can I just say - this is the most open, the most honest and the most telling conversation Sansa has had in YEARS.

She had to bite her tongue, lie and say she loved Joffrey, call herself the daughter of a traitor, scheme behind the scenes with strangers in King's Landing. She was always too scared in KL to speak freely with *anyone*. She was never able to speak her mind or have an open conversation with someone or feel like her opinion and thoughts were real or being heard. Even when people showed her kindness (ie Tyrion) she was always on her guard because she couldn't trust anyone.

Cut to LF. Sansa spoke cryptically with LF. I don't believe she ever truly trusted him - she just knew he was a better choice than KL, and he seemed to have saved her and helped her so she was giving him the benefit of the doubt. And why not? He was an older, powerful Lord and she was just a young girl. Of course he knows best. So when she spoke with him, she was always wary. "what do you want?" "why did you do this?" why why why.

Her "teachings" from Cersei made her stick it out with him. She thought she could use his feelings towards her against him. (the best weapon is between your legs) Cue the scene after she lies to save him. "I know what you want." (But LF makes her believe she's wrong and that shes not that cunning, which creates doubt in her mind that maybe she's got it all wrong and shes not as smart as she thinks she is)

But she never says these thoughts out loud or feels safe speaking about her life while traveling with LF or in the Vale. She supposed to fly under the radar, and her opinions dont matter. No one asks, no one cares and she does what shes told. And look how that worked out for her.

Now, Sansa in Winterfell with the Boltons. She's literally just a tapestry on the wall here. Used and abused - of course no one cares about her or wants to hear her opinion. And even if they did, she wouldn't give it. She doesn't like these people. It speaks a great deal about her character that she doesn't beg for death while being tortured and abused in WF - that she keeps trying to escape. Shes still so stubborn and willful that she will escape these demons if its the last thing she does. SHE IS A STRONG MOFO.

Now - I have talked a lot about this (and gotten a right amount of hate for it on the subreddit) but Sansa was met with denial after denial while trying to rally forces for WF. From Jon, from Davos, from Lyanna, from Blackfish, from Lord Glover, etc. Literally, they all shoot her down and act like shes a stupid little girl - which probably infuriates her to no end. The reason she went and got LF and KotV is because all of these people who keep ignoring her were putting her LIFE in jeopardy, and she was not about to let that happen. Not again.

So at the end of S6 we have Jon kind of admitting he should have listened to her (and yes a lot of this could have been better if they just TALKED about it) and saying they have to trust each other. You see Sansa realize she should have - perhaps she was just stuck in this mindset she has had since her father was killed. She tried a little - no one listened - so she went back to her old tried and true ways.

Look at all of her scenes leading up to S7 - and show me a more animated and honest dialogue she has had with another character. SHE FINALLY FEELS COMFORTABLE AND FREE ENOUGH TO SPEAK HER MIND. After years of being put into a corner, she finally speaks up when she has an opinion, she tells Jon what she really thinks, she implores that he trust her. Im not saying shes right or wrong or that Jon is right or wrong - but at least shes SPEAKING. and thats a huge accomplishment for her.

Now Jon - don't you dare go put her back in a fucking corner.