#cuthbert binns

[celestemagnoliathewriter]

More Artbreeder images of professors from reddit - so cool. This is a few of the ones I thought were best. There was no Remus Lupin though :(

[hoarding-niffler]

Any headcanons on what kind of mischief the Hogwarts Legacy professors got into when they were students themselves?

There are a lot of teachers and we have barely anything to work with personality-wise, so this is rather short and kind of one-dimensional. I know it's unrealistic that each of them would focus on what they're teaching later on, but hey, my headcanons, my rules. Also, again, the devs gave us nearly NOTHING about them T_T Satyavati Shah: - She constantly snuck out after curfew to watch the stars and corrected her teacher if they got astronomical facts wrong

Cuthbert Binns: - He underlined "important" historical facts in school books. They were not his own.

Phineas Nigellus Black: - He was a very lazy student and used his reputation to get by most of the time.

Mudiwa Onai: - She stealthily rearranged her partner's tea leaves to give them a fright.

Chiyo Kogawa: - She preaches how brooms aren't meant for loops and risky manoeuvres, but she was the queen of nosedives and loopings.

Bai Howin: - She overfed the wild Jobberknolls around the school and watched with glee as their droppings hit her bullies.

Aesop Sharp: - He stole potion ingredients to experiment on his own. He's responsible for one of the toilets being out of order to this day.

Abraham Ronen: - He always turned his teacher's lessons into games and roped his fellow classmates into them. Everything had to be a contest.

Mirabel Garlick: - When she witnessed Sirona being bullied she unleashed a young chomping cabbage to bite off some fingers. This woman is no joke.

Dinah Hecat: - Too many to count and probably illegal to mention. As a prefect she let most students get away with their mischief.

Eleazar Fig: - He always snuck out to Hogsmeade with Miriam and take walks by moonlight. Yes, he's just sweet. Deal with it.

Matilda Weasley: - A party isn't a real party until someone's smalls are nailed to the common room's bill-board, and that's all I'm going to say about that.

[kkangkkangie]

Professor Headcanons

Albus Dumbledore

he’s very accomplished in terms of wizarding academics, having won nearly every accolade there is. but—but, he’s also not averse in using like “muggle” techniques. the reason he even matched up against Voldemort is (cause I guarantee you) this person pulled out some muggle warfare tactic that caught him off-guard.

✨weaponized ignorance✨ (like seriously everyone knows he’s a genius, but like gets away with saying stuff like “nitwit” and “blubber”) he feels like a Luna kinnie at times

he switched out the smart three piece suit when (1) he no longer needed to impress Grindewald & (2) realized wizard robes were like blanket hoodies

“to be a wizen is a right, but to use magic is a privilege” 

Minerva McGonagall

this lady has the wizen equivalent of a physics PhD & she did it all with grace and sophistication. do not mess with her—there’s a reason she was chosen to wrangle a bunch of kids who think rules are like glowsticks (i.e. meant to be broken).

this is that one professor who grades your exams in one day & posts grades immediately. Alternatively, she somehow never misses a question. either she has the world’s greatest spell for grading or she’s just that good. 

she’s the de-facto leader of the faculty (other than Dumbledore, but even he defers to her at times) + the stern parent that makes sure that the emo child (snape) gets social interactions or botany hyperfixater (sprout) doesn’t create a breed of plants that eats the students, etc. 

“words are meaningless if there is no willpower driving it—conversely, one should not speak unless one wants to will something to reality”

Severus Snape

that asocial genius trope. he hated eating at the faculty table in front of students so he didn’t. until came Celaena and Harry Co., then for the sake of keeping his sanity intact, he did (he even does a little headcount of his students & panics if one of them is missing)

he wears the same robes for a reason. they keep him cool in the heat of summer & somehow provides insulation for the cold dungeon winters. it works. he wears.

he learned that simply not requiring textbooks in his class (or at least one pertaining to brewing) was better than losing his shit everytime he saw the terrible instructions. in his first few years of teaching, he set 4 textbooks on fire. 

“there is nothing worse than incompetency masquerading as confidence” 

Pomona Sprout

acts like she’s on five coffees a day even though she doesn’t drink any. this lady has the strength and energy of a whole farm—she could plant all day & be the happiest person on the planet. she’s the strongest faculty member (stronger than Hooch, which allows for some fun challenges when inebriated) 

she experiments a lot! like she has several notebooks dedicated to recording the minute changes in the properties of plants—with the aid of Snape’s potion skills. the two singlehandedly came up with a new set of ingredients for seasonal potions for the Hospital Wing.

loves to talk with students outside of classes (oftentimes, dragging them to the greenhouses) & it really didn’t matter what house you were in. most students found her the easiest to approach from all houses and years.

“plants are like miniature humans! but I do think they listen much better than you lot”

Aurora Sinistra

she’s that one teacher that’s super hard at the beginning, but as you get used to her teaching methods—best teacher ever. the reason that students in arithmancy usually get a minimum of an A? it’s her. she taught them well.

best tea brewer ever. periodt. Snape’s a close close second, but there’s something about the infusion of moonlight that makes hers legendary. the two often share recipes together—a habit from their years at Hogwarts (although, back then, it was mostly recipes for their friends b/c wow were they bad at taking care of themselves)

she tries to keep homework as small as possible b/c it’s not possible to wait until the stars are out to do them sometimes, but it means that classes are more often. she’s the first teacher to adjust the schedule based on the seasons—less classes, more hw in winter & vice versa in summer season)

“every myths and legends can be ascribed to the beauty of outer universe—we must not forget”

Filius Flitwick

just to start, big aristotle kinnie. he has the aristotelian physics PhD equivalent in the wizarding world (definite big brain). he’s the only other person who can really get technical with McGonagall—both of them are menaces at faculty gatherings.

he has the best manners—not just like table manners, but like how to engage in socialite behavior expertise in multiple customs. he’s practically eligible to be a proper diplomat, but he chose to teach charms because he practically becomes like a little child again, wide-eyed and excited.

he has a very structured manner of teaching b/c he realized how often he’d go on tangents. his older students have the privilege to listen to his rabbit holes before descending down into their own rabbit holes too. 

“brilliance is subjective! every idea is brilliant if you are so enamored by it”

Cuthbert Binns

ghosty man who continued to teach even after death. he became a true icon of living history cause not only did he teach Riddle, McGonagall, Moriarty, and even Harry Potter—he lived through them & he did it all half-asleep. respect.

has no respect for wizen legend and myths—he’s much more rather interested in wizen fact that align with Muggle mythology and legends. there’s an element that he is able to prove and extrapolate—it gets too much with wizen technicalities. 

this man has two office hours. you can either go ask for help and gain a whole lecture on your topic or you can join a group sleepfest. some students with insomnia noticed being able to sleep with his voice as white noise. truly a cure for them.

“we [historians] are not seers; wizen merely have an unfortunate habit of making mistakes and forgetting about them”

[fabulous-fic-quotes]

“Binns doesn’t read homework,” Regulus repeated. “He skims the first paragraph, skips the middle and reads the last one. If you hit the key words and the length, you’re an E. And he doesn’t bother at all if it’s more than fifty inches.”

“No.” Hermione was taken aback, crushed even.

“Barty’s been turning in non-human erotica since fourth year.”

“He can’t not read the homework he gives us! He’s a teacher! What about our grades?!” Hermione stressed out.

“All determined by the final exams. He does read those… for the most part.”

Hermione grasped her hair in despair.

Teenagers Scare The Living Sh*t Out Of Me - LimeOfMagicLimo

[blueboxbeagleart]

Hogwarts staff meeting after Ron was poisoned. The conversation changes from the source of the poison to the ensuring relationship dramas. Sprout wins at staff meeting bingo.

[nicodemuslily]

Male teachers

Say hello to the Professor Binns! o/ 

It’s not easy to draw a ghost without the colours or the blu-ish aura around, but it’s supposed to be him. The scene takes place during the fourth book when Binns do realise that something weird is happening in the school (the Yule Ball actually). I always thought that Binns was disconnected from the reality and sometimes forgot he wasn’t in his times anymore. 

Second scene is inspired from something that really happened. Some years ago, I was talking with some colleagues in the tiny kitchen of our office. I can’t remember the subject (must be food, because French, you know. XD), but suddenly we, female employees skipped on bras and underwears for no reason. The only male around flew as fast as possible of the place. :D Then I imagined that this kind of things can happen in Hogwarts, with female teachers suddenly forgetting that there are also male teachers around and start talking about stuff they are not supposed to know about. XD

Third sketch happens during the 5th book, when everyone is against Snape because of his past, except three of them. And one of them is Filius because, as a metis, he knows what it means to be repelled because of the fear rumors spread around. 

Last scene takes place during the 6th book. Not my favorite HP years but, it will be an interesting moment to work with. Severus knows that the war is coming fast, that Dumbledore is going to die in some months, that the next year will be like hell for him and as DADA teacher, he has the possibility to learn to the students how to protect themselves. But, he has no right to tell anything to anyone and maybe think he was not the good person to teach magic defense or attack, especially near to Minerva or Filius who are a dozen time more powerful than himself. Yes, really interesting. :)

[ask-richard-jackdaw]

Mr.Jackdaw,

I still expect you to turn in your homework.

Being dead hasn't stopped me form teaching. Nor should it prevent you from learning.

*Richard feels the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Well, that is what he would have felt had he still been alive, but the memories, even of the physical realm, are not that easy to set aside. Especially when your former (current?) teacher is sending you an owl with a reminder to turn in your homework. The younger ghost doesn't even remember what that ancient homework even is at this point! Richard nervously starts scribbling a ghost letter in response.*

Good afternoon, Professor Binns!

I assure you I was not aware that I still count as a student even decades after my death. I humbly ask you for an extension on that assignment and a reminder on the topic currently under examination.

Your humble student,

Richard Jackdaw

[djfatchip]

Professor Cuthbert Binns

[greenhousethree]

Hello Green hope things are going well! I'm the same asker with the theory about Binns from chapt 2, and now I have more thoughts... I can tell you clearly have something planned here, but i can't tell how it will tie in to everything else yet. After chapt 4 I'm wondering if we're going to find out that he actually left during Ginnys 6th year instead, because he would be the only teacher that couldn't be tortured or killed for breaking the Death Eaters rules. And that makes me wonder if any of the other ghosts left, too? We haven't heard much about them.

ANyway, can't wait for chapter 5!

Thanks for your ask, anon! I can't tell you how happy it makes me that out of everything else in this fic, Binns' absence is the thing you keep noticing.

I love the theories and this is no exception... and I don't want to give too much away on this particular matter (do with that what you will), but I'm so stoked you put this much thought into your predictions about this little fic 👀

Chapter 5 coming very soon!

[hogwartslegacyreactions2]

Hi!! I absolutely LOVE your writing, you do such an amazing job!! I was wondering, if you have the time and are taking requests, could you do how each character cuddles with MC? Can be platonic or romantic, and I was wondering if you could also add professors. Thank you so much, I hope it's not to much to ask!! Have a great day/night!!❤️

A/N: romantic cuddling for the friends, platonic cuddle/hugs for the professors :3

HLC CUDDLE HEADCANNONS

SEBASTIAN SALLOW: This boy is a snake. Full body wrapped around MC like a python. He won't let go easily, either. But he's warm and gives many kisses, so the entrapment is worth it.

OMINIS GAUNT: Physical touch has rarely led to good things in his life so MC will need to be patient with him. Once their relationship is to the point that he feels safe with them, he cuddles with his hands constantly mapping their body. He will have every part of them committed to memory.

ANNE SALLOW: She likes laying on top of them with her face on their chest. She finds their heartbeat soothing. She also likes hearing it speed up when she's feeling cheeky.

IMELDA REYES: Physical touch isn't one of her love languages, so she doesn't go out of her way to cuddle them. She doesn't reject it, She finds MC's affection cute, but she'll be reading or messing with her wand while she lays there with MC attached.

NATSAI ONAI: She is the big spoon. She must protecc. She whispers all sorts of sweet nothing's while she's holding them and gives little neck kisses.

GARRETH WEASLEY: Cuddling him is dangerous because MC never knows what he'll do. This goof can't help but make MC laugh. He loves hearing it. He'll boop their nose, lick their face, even tickle them for a reaction.

LEANDER PREWETT: Long boi with long limbs. MC is tangled in him with little hope of getting away. He has quite the wingspan, so even if MC is on the other side of the bed, he can just casually reach over and yoink them to his side.

AMIT THAKKAR: Hope MC likes his voice, cause he's a talker. MC is his captive audience and he will go on and on and ON about just about anything. Mostly astronomical topics, but he goes off on tangents.

EVERETT CLOPTON: He's the little spoon. Doesn't matter how tall MC is compared to him. They could be the longest mfer or just a little backpack, he loves them either way. He feels held.

POPPY SWEETING: Smol. Turns into a ball like a little hedgehog. Might get lost in the cushions or blankets, so hold tight. Also a bit of a squirmer, sometimes struggles to get comfortable. She'll settle down eventually.

~~~~

ELEAZAR FIG: Dad. Hugs. Like, sit on the couch under his arm, dad hugs. Warm and comforting and loving. MC will likely fall asleep.

MATILDA WEASLEY: She's not too much of a hugger, but she won't deny one if MC asks. They'll be short but comforting.

CHIYO KOGAWA: She's not much of a hugger but if MC really needs one, she'll oblige. Might be a bit awkward, but she means well.

AESOP SHARP: MC will have to be strategic. First, gain his trust. That's the hard part. Second, catch him in a good mood. Third, MC must ask ONLY when no one else is around. His affection is very private. Fourth, (optional step) liquid luck.

ABRAHAM RONEN: Favorite Uncle vibes. Playful bear hugs that crush ribs and pick MC up off their feet. Best hugs for when MC needs a laugh.

MIRABEL GARLICK: Very much a hugger. MC can hold her as long as they need to. Let all their worries and stress melt away in her genuine embrace.

MUDIWA ONAI: She gives the best Mom hugs MC could ever experience. She'll go so far as to hug MC in her lap and rock them like a child, even if MC is tall.

BAI HOWIN: If MC needs affection, she suggests they seek out mooncalves or puffskiens.

DINAH HECAT: She is more affectionate than she lets on. If MC is stressed and needs a hug, she offers one without prompting.

CUTHBERT BINNS: He's a ghost. Move along.

SATYAVATI SHAH: She's not an affectionate person. MC will get more warmth from a glacier.

PHINEAS NIGELLUS BLACK: If MC knows what's good for them, they won't touch him. Ever.

[saintsenara]

Not from the ask list but the characters in ur fics as Irish counties and why?

anon, this has absolutely sent me. i have genuinely never seen something more up my alley.

let's start with characters we can pull from the series for ireland's six superior counties, shall we...

antrim = oliver wood

a county full of lads who've never met a spivvy tracksuit they don't think is the height of fashion, and who have a vastly inflated sense of their success at sports.

armagh = tom riddle

armagh has a [deservedly] bloody reputation. he could settle down in the murder triangle. he'd like that.

down = draco malfoy

people who live in co. down really like thinking they're better than the rest of us just because it's easy for them to get to belfast [lads, how's that something to boast about?], so they have to be the series' whiniest flop.

fermanagh = rubeus hagrid

fermanagh is full of docile lads who build things, in my experience.

londonderry = ron weasley

canonically gorgeous, gorgeous girlies live in this fine county - by which i mean, of course, that i do. we deserve to be represented by the series' most gorgeous girly. and a ginger sweetheart with six siblings [so you know which side of the sectarian divide his parents are on...] would go down a storm with our mams.

tyrone = harry potter

my brother once had his nose broken in a pub in strabane, which doesn't sound particularly interesting until you realise that my brother is a priest. by which i mean - a county filled with people who are reckless, quick-tempered, and always ready to throw hands? it can only be represented by one man...

---

and then the rest...

carlow = quirinus quirrell

the most interesting thing there is a big rock.

cavan = percy weasley

everyone i've ever met from cavan has been really boring and really tight. so there's that.

clare = ginny weasley

because it's gorgeous, in a not like other girls way.

cork = albus dumbledore

look at this canon line and tell me dumbledore's not a cork man... "In fact, being — forgive me — rather cleverer than most men, my mistakes tend to be correspondingly huger.” 

donegal = sybill trelawney

always away with the fairies up there... and always drunk too.

dublin = walburga black

everyone you've ever met who lives in dublin is genuinely shocked to discover that the rest of the world exists beyond the m50. it's not not giving "has never set foot in muggle london and would die before she did".

galway = arthur and molly weasley

galway is the home of the nation's sophisticated [and, apparently, sexually adventurous] culchies - which fits two people from clearly quite distinguished backgrounds who nonetheless live the way they do...

kerry = gilderoy lockhart

you will never see american tourists get scammed more glamorously than in kerry.

kildare = regulus black

considerably less interesting than - and devoid of identity in comparison to - its neighbour, dublin.

kilkenny = charlie weasley

all they do is have red hair and hurl.

laois = daphne greengrass

on account of her irrelevance.

leitrim = sally-ann perks

on account of her irrelevance.

limerick = bellatrix lestrange

limerick used to be known as "stab city". she'd fit right in.

longford = mungundus fletcher

gombeen men abound.

louth = myrtle warren

because they [by which i mean the two people i know who were born there...] are always fucking moaning.

mayo = remus lupin

perpetually mopey, unless they reckon they're great at something.

meath = cormac mclaggen

they wish they were as class as the lads in dublin.

monaghan = cuthbert binns

genuinely couldn't locate it on a map.

offaly = grawp

i mean, who fucking knows? the entire place is a bog.

roscommon = aberforth dumbledore

you can guess why...

sligo = fred and george weasley

wheeler dealers, the lot of them.

tipperary = fleur delacour

the home of gorgeous, gorgeous girlies with striking accents.

waterford = dobby

they love a good strike.

westmeath = hermione granger

not somewhere you'd expect you'd choose to live if you were a bit of a know-it-all. and yet.

wexford = neville longbottom

they love to bang on about the soil.

wicklow = marge dursley

she drives a range rover and looks down on anyone who farms, change my mind.

[other answers from this ask game]

[broomsticks]

HP fic rec list: underrated gems of 2022

AO3 collection here. mostly ultra rare pairs, gen fic, character studies, and G/T rated fic. all are short <10k-ish reads (plenty of <1k ficlets) - do give them a read if any look interesting!

transports of delight by @swoontodeath (1.7k, G). The Knight Bus meets the Catbus. Sometimes destiny looks a lot like driving in the same direction.

pairing: Knight Bus (Harry Potter)/Catbus (My Neighbor Totoro). come for the crack ship, stay for the autistic stan shunpike. i’m a sucker for outsider POV and this is why — such great opportunity for some unique characterization, which this author took full advantage of here!

-#-

Life of Pye by @houseofhebrideanblacks (9k, E). Augustus Pye sees patients at St. Mungo's.

SUCH a creative unique fic - love it when authors take their deep IRL expertise and weave it into the canon HP verse. as the author put it, for anyone curious about what a nonmagical doctor sounds like writing about what they imagine magical medicine is like, day in and day out.

“It’s Puddlemere versus the Cannons tonight. The cup final.” Pye stopped mid-stride and mid-thought, shoulders seeming to weep under the weight of realisation. “Oh no,” he almost whispered. “Oh yes,” Marge glowered, “and you’re alone tonight, Rupert is off sick.” “Good heavens,” Pye whimpered, his coffee seeming to shrink in his hand, both in potency and relevance. In the waiting room behind him, three blokes hurricaned in chanting “CANNONS, CANNONS, CANNONS,” their unconscious friend slumped and dragged between them. “You know how it is, Pye,” Marge turned and shuffled back to validate the young witch’s national insurance card. Speaking over her shoulder, she finished, “never a dull moment at Mungo’s.”

-#-

Strangers In A Strange Land by @sleepstxtic (7.5k words, T). Helga, Salazar, and Godric dock in a strange land looking for the elusive fourth member of their team.

helga/rowena, founders friendship with POC Rowena Ravenclaw and Viking Helga Hufflepuff. CANON NODS and POC REP and FEMSLASH and a wonderful fascinating setting — ticks every single one of my AU boxes. another incredibly inventive and criminally underrated story.

-#-

A Different Truth by @paulamcg (2.8k, G). A week before Halloween 1993, when a colleague appreciates his company, Cuthbert may feel alive, even though he's dead and it's Saturday.

ok this is the last time i will say criminally underrated. canon-compliant POA first person cuthbert binns & remus lupin. this could’ve been slash and i would’ve been sold on it. i love their friendship, bonding over literature (of course) and a walk in the woods (so unexpected, but works so well.)

-#-

Meagre Pieces by @vdoshu (1k words, T). The Muggle-born Registration Commission is announced, and Andromeda feels sick.

The fact that the first Muggle-born Minister for Magic was a great victory for equality . . . one which was never again repeated.

@thistlecatfics’s trans teddy tonks x andromeda is taking over the world and i’m here for it. the political commentary in this. doshu you absolute wizard — you’ve got such range and you nail it every. single. time.

-#-

O let the world come at you, love (currently anonymous) (5k, T). Twelve-year-old Harry tries to figure out his parents' polyamorous relationship with Peter Pettigrew.

the first fic for the peter/lily/james tag on AO3, gifted to me for this year’s rare pairs exchange, and it’s all the wholesome fluff i i could’ve wanted from this ship and more!!! so much poly rep!! background wolfstar+tonks (ish), dorlene+implied others, and just the perfect epilogue 🥰

"Does it bother you that your parents are with Pete?" Sirius asked. "No! I know they're polymers."

-#-

Nirmal by @crazybutgood (2.8k, G).

postwar cho/padma. i ADORE this fic. there are literally LINKS to all the places and foods and songs mentioned, it’s an ENTIRE immersive multimedia experience in 3k words - a beautiful and horrendously underappreciated fic, imo.

hawa paani ka badlaav hona chahiye—A change in atmosphere is often needed to improve one's health or state of mind. Literally, a change in the winds, and the water. Parvati quoted that saying to us one evening last month, suggesting that it would be good for Cho and me. My parents knew that I had been with Cho for just over a year then, and welcomed her to stay with us after the Battle … Cho actually looked interested at the idea and suggested our home countries for a month each. And so, we’re currently visiting Mumbai first, staying in a Muggle area at my Muggle maushi’s place, in July—during the monsoon season.

-#-

a heart the size of jupiter (a smile like the sun) by gghostish (300 words, G, no archive warnings).

linny, epileptic luna lovegood. such a lovely achy hurty little thing ❤️

-#-

métamorphoses by @venom0usbarbie (5k, M). The blood curse took her grandmother. And now, she has to pay the piper if she doesn't want it to take her too.

astoria greengrass-centric, astoria & hermione (gen/possible pre-relationship). this fic wow. where do i begin!! the descriptive writing. the angsty family feels. the way barbie writes the blurring of thoughts and feelings and emotions into physical sensations is harrowingly good. check out everything else by her if you liked this, her style is inimitable.

-#-

wood-rush and wildflowers by @nanneramma (500 words, G). Lily has a secret, and it's time to tell Petunia.

wonderful little canon compliant alternate character POV vignette, gorgeous writing. also reccing this horrorific pansy/tom (ad te omnis caro veniet, 1.3k, M), this gorgeously sad canon-compliant alice & neville (gaps, 300, G), and every single one of nan’s summer femslash double drabbles!

-#-

covered in your ivy by @girl-with-goats (1.5k, M).

smutty BDSM remus/lily with planty metaphors that just work so well for this pairing!

-#-

I Always Underestimate You by @patriceavril (10k, M).

sirius & lily friendship! multi-era, canon compliant, sirius/mary and jily. i love the way patrice characterizes this friendship -- it’s not always easy, and that’s why it feels so earned!

-#-

Madam Smith by @lumosatnight (200 words, G). HOKEY/WINKY! SO charming and sweet and lovely and fluffy.

A Bleak Midwinter by @bluesundaycake (500, T). A Fenrir Greyback character study. feel sorry for baby fenrir thank you bye <3

Pray by @krethes (300, T). A Hope Lupin character study. yes hello hi read and CRY WITH ME

The Prince's Poems by @inmyownlittlecorner5. seven poems, misc formats. this author writes the most enthralling snape, and making it poetry is just !!! unfair. such powerful writing in so few words.

[helenadurazzo]

Give me a Hogwarts Legacy Character and one of my main OCs in an ask and I’ll tell you what they think of each other!

Send as many asks as you want

My Main OCs

Phineas Hearst

Marie McKay

Zsuzsi Schröder

Characters (Students)

Adelaide Oakes

Arthur Plummly

Charlotte Morrison

Evangeline Bardsley

Poppy Sweeting

Sacharissa Tugwood

Lenora Everleigh

Cressida Blume

Eric Northcott

Garreth Weasley

Lawrence Davies

Leander Prewett

Natsai Onai

Astoria Crickett

Amit Thakkar

Duncan Hobhouse

Everett Clopton

Mahendra Pehlwaan

Samantha Dale

Anne Sallow

Sebastian Sallow

Ominis Gaunt

Imelda Reyes

Grace Pinch-Smedley

Violet McDowell

Characters (Teachers)

Phineas Nigellus Black

Matilda Weasley

Eleazar Fig

Aesop Sharp

Dinah Hecat

Mirabel Garlick

Abraham Ronen

Cuthbert Binns

Bai Howin

Chiyo Kogawa

Mudiwa Onai

Satyavati Shah

Noreen Blainey

Agnes Scribner

Gladwin Moon

[fabulous-fic-quotes]

"Shit," He groaned. "I fucking hate History of Magic."

"Don't let poor, old Professor Binns hear that, Ev," Regulus mused. "He might just keel over and die."

i got wasted (like all my potential) - ascxlla

[vivithefolle]

The thing about Rowling is that she bases a lot of characters on people she knows or knew irl. So you have these perfectly decent characters and she just doesn't have a clue how they work internally.

Exactly! I've answered a Quora question on that, previously.

Below, the text of said answer:

Did J.K. Rowling base any of her characters on herself or people she knows personally?

Pretty much all of them?

She said there was “a bit of her in every of her characters". Which tends to happen naturally when you write.

(For example, being autistic, I tend to write characters as very introspective and remembering small details about a lot of stuff and being able to perform literary analysis in the middle of conversation. I've been informed that this is not how the “average" human works. So when I write a character, I often end up making them autistic because that's literally how my brain works. It's unfathomable to me that you wouldn't be paralyzed with fear by the idea of making a decision. Taking an opportunity on the fly, throwing your whole world off-balance with just one gratuitous action? What folly is this??)

According to Rowling, “I married Harry Potter. I married a very brave and gutsy person. And that's who Harry is”. Okay, so before Sauron and Acidic Virtuesignaller come crawling out the woodwork, I would like for us all to consider the implications: so Harry is “a very brave and gutsy person", and that's all. That's the only qualifier for Harry. To be Harry you need to be brave and gutsy. It's not like there's a construct in this series that's literally called The House Of The Brave. With a magic sword that only comes to those that are brave and gutsy enough to wield it. Which three people in the books have used that sword? Harry, Ron, and Neville. If only Harry was “very brave and gutsy" then what are we calling Ron and Neville? Hermione? Ginny? Luna? Snape? Dumbledore? Ok so there we go, if the requirement to be Harry is “be very brave and gutsy" then I can point to half a dozen characters that have the same characteristic ON TOP OF having an actual personality.

Ron was based on Rowling's childhood friend who owned a blue Ford Anglia. Based on Rowling's later comments about having “dated Ron" in her youth, we can infer that Rowling wrote into Ron some of the bad behaviours of guys she'd dated, probably with the idea of having him outgrow them (but considering how much she seems to enjoy writing Ron getting punished for these behaviours…). Some of the things she'd felt about poverty are spoken from Ron's mouth in GOF, and the Locket's tirade is a dead ringer (albeit with the genders reversed) for what she reported her father told her about how he'd rather have had a son.

Hermione is according to JKR a caricature of how she was when she was younger. “I wasn't that clever, but I was that annoying on occasion". I doubt JKR got invited to a ball by a super famous athlete though.

Snape was allegedly based on her chemistry teacher, John Nettleship, who was autistic and I can believe would have made jokes that wouldn't necessarily land as such (solidarity 😔✊). However I believe Snape was very much a caricature and an exaggeration instead of a “100% authentic" portrait of John Nettleship, even if he later came to call the character “me". Rowling needed her Mean Teacher archetype after all.

Cuthbert Binns, the ghost teacher of History that is excruciatingly droll and boring, seems to be a summation of Rowling's thoughts about his subject. Also a convenient way of forgoing worldbuilding.

Mothers are a very important part of Rowling's world. Lily's sacrifice defines the entire series, Molly Weasley is a strong presence through the books and sends Bellatrix's fanatic arse to Hell, Merope Gaunt's refusal to live shapes Voldemort into who he is, Narcissa Malfoy lies to Voldemort in exchange for her son's safety, even Barty Crouch Jr's mother made the ultimate sacrifice by switching places with her son in Azkaban. The only mother figure that isn't positive is Walburga Black, and even she gets to have a humanizing moment when Hermione theorizes that she was kind to Kreacher in DH. All this takes on a whole new meaning when you learn that JKR wrote the first Harry Potter in the wake of her mother's death.

By contrast, father figures are much less revered, and again it is directly a result of JKR herself: she had a notoriously bad relationship with her father, Peter James Rowling. One can postulate that Peter Pettigrew's name wasn't all a matter of alliteration, and that James Potter's redemption was the sort of thing Rowling might have wished of her own father.

Pansy Parkinson was a conglomerate of all the girls who bullied Rowling at school.

Umbridge was based on a work colleague - though she's apparently another conglomerate character - who hid nastiness behind a syrupy sweet exterior. Umbridge is often said to be the worst villain in Harry Potter - because while few people ever experience a genocidal terrorist stalking them, many have met someone like Umbridge who abuse their power just because they enjoy feeling in control of others.

The Death Eaters in general were based on the IRA, but took more cues from Nazi Germany in Deathly Hallows.