#cuz like it's his day off or sumn

[mymrsweirdnessshipperstuff-blog]

I feel like Kaoru would hit Kojiro with his fan closed sometimes, or draw on his face when he's sleeping on the couch using his calligraphy ink and brush

[matchadobo]

KIDD; picking him up from jail😭

warning/s: gn reader, modern au, kidd is violent, mentions of injuries and sex but nothin too crazy, kidd's a red flag sighhhh

* a real piece of work!! he'd frequent his days at the police station he'd start being homies with the cops

* would have a record of like jaywalking, traffic violations, gambling, prohibited purchases, assault. falling in that range bc he's pretty impulsive and does whatever he wants, but it don't mean he'll steal or kill or sumn

* most of the times it'd be assault 😭 pls he'll always be throwing hands at folks who crosses him or rubs him the wrong way. with you coming in the picture, he lessened this attitude. but it doesn't mean it'll stop.

* you always have to pick his ass up from police station 😭 it'd almost be like dates

* he'll always look like this good little kid that got into a fight patiently waiting for you with a scowl. but sometimes, if the officers gets too overbearing and starts insulting him, you'd interrupt their screaming fest. because amidst the cuffs, kidd will not hesitate to point and sneer at them ✋😩

* you'd have to physically stop him and apologize profusely to the cops to not add to his record more

* during which, he'd be littered with bruises and cuts. his clothes would be tattered but it's mostly because of him cuz he's just way too violent 🥹 especially when the other party have the same pettiness as him

* "look at you, you're worse than the last time!

* "you shoulda seen the other guy." he'd snicker, very proud at his state.

* you'd sigh heavily and drag his ass back home

* once home, kidd will notice that you'll be pissed. cuz bailing him is getting on your nerves, another money spent cuz of his arrogance! so he'll try and "apologize" by hugging you from the back and kissing your neck or smelling your hair as he mumble his "apologies"

* "i can always count on ya, huh?"

* "fuck off, kidd."

* you'd pull away from his embrace but he'd easily lock fingers with you and pull you back again to his arms

* "okay, okay, i'm sorry, babe. thanks for having my back again, like always, hm? you'll be glad this time, cuz i really did my best to not fight, alright? the other guy started it and he pissed me off"

* "sure, he did." you looked away with knitted brows, squeezing his hands on yours. "let me guess, he was just looking at you."

* "...that and some other things too! was at the bar enjoying shots with the boys, and he stole the rum i ordered. fucker tossed his money as payment at me thinkin' i'd let it slide like that."

* "guess he deserved it then."

* he'd follow you into the living room, sit by the couch, and watch you fetch the hygiene kit. you'd sit by the coffee table across him, motioning for him to come closer. this'd always be his favorite part.

* you ask him to take his shirt off to see the bruises from his torso, he'll pull it over his head and you really still have to swallow your spit each time you see him shirtless even after the long time your relationship lasted

* while you tend to his cuts and you're so close to his face, he'd always muse at you like it's the first time he'd been close like this. it'd always make you blush and sometimes forget why you're pissed. plEASE IMAGINE HIM being real quiet, observant, and patient with you and you're so close at kissing-width KSHDBXVDBV DIES the eustass kidd shutting up for once and staring at you cuz he finds your focused face real cute✋👰‍♀️

* "with your request of stopping my impulsiveness, it'd be hard to comply if this is what i'd come home to all the damn time."

* "i'll beat your ass myself don't worry." you'd clap back, pressing the q-tip with betadine on his cuts to elicit a pain response from him. which was successful, but he'd be laughing afterward

* he'd ramble all about how great he was at the fight, real proud of his mess. while he does so, you'd move onto his body to tend to some bruises

* "your ass hurts?"

* "kind of, fell pretty hard."

* "okay, so no sex."

* "what?! hey that's not-"

* "if you end up having more bruises and injuries, i don't want that."

* "b-but- ow!" you'd dab a little bit harder but not too much, just enough to shut him up

have a lot in queue?? just polishing the others and will release soon

[iplayghoul]

hot tub sex wit ony ? drabble ?? oneshot ?? this longer than i thought it wld be i just cant stop talkin... its 11 am bruh

its soooo obvious that im more into a soft sex kinda vibe, always or rough sex written in the most gentle and soft way possible 🙈

so i cant help but constantly imagine hot tub sex wit ony. in my head at the start of the relationship he constantly gravitates towards our apartment. in his mind he felt it was safer for his partners always, not wanting you to feel yk at danger in a man's house despite how safe he made you feel BUT ofc you have a jacuzzi.

in this universe, like in my head, i imagine both ony and reader have jobs in the medical feild likkee maybe ony is a surgeon and reader is a private psychiatrist who sometimes picks up shifts at the hospital onyankopon works at ???

ANYWHO becuzz of this they sometimes work hard ass shifts, whether theyre long or short, its hard as fuckk and they come home tired. ony gets home first, maybe an hour earlier and he has a key card to your apartment so he can let himself in, feeds your pets and relaxes on the couch, thinking of if he should make you two dinner or order sumn.

then he thinks of the jacuzzi, a nice relaxing hot soak after a hard shift is all he needs so he stops petting your cat or roughhousing with the dog and orders sushi, grabbing a drink of his choice whether it be wine, a light alcohol or sum shit for yall to sip when the sushi comes.

i think you get home not long after the sushi is delivered. maybe 10 minutes later and its still fresh and warm OUU shit i need sum sushi rn 😭 and ony fine ass is in some black swim shorts with the sushi all out on a platter wit the sauces on it, and hes got his feet in the water while he jus sits on the side of the jacuzzi and calls out to let yk where he is

you take a quick rinse off before donning a bikini, a black one to match his b4 putting up your braids and joining him on the edge wit a kiss. i like to think ony loooves kissing. he loves stimulatin his mouth n his lips. its a long, soft kiss and u cant help but lean into each other its like ugghh at last i can relax and let my gaurd down and just be vulnerable after being in this big position at work yk? 🤭

so you share several long kissing before both getting waist deep into the hot tub, letting the bubbling heated fun engulf you both as you down pieces of sushi, feeding each other while staying connected at the hip. i think he cant help but put his hands on u, always letting it rest on ur hip. sometimes i tink he jus likes to be touching you at all times its like a safety thing, sometimes jus resting his hand on your shoulder, ankle, tummy, dont matterrr he wants to kno ur there.

its only a matter of time before talking about each others day becomes nothing more than a whisper of a conversation. and ur eyes cant leave each others lips... necks, chests... and then ur kissin again :) hehee and kissin all over each other so tenderly and meek.

just then hes slipping his hands under ur peachy squishy ass n lifting u to the edge of the tub, kickin ur feet in the air and he sees ur toes are done. pretty pink polish with a baby pink french tip, and baby pink flower designs dancing across a few toes ... hes not one to have a raging foot fetish but it entices him,,, sooo he puts ur toes in his mouth and it tickles a bit ! but feeling his hot tongue caress ur little toes carelessly makes u feel all warm, especially ur cheeks.

eeeeek and then he jus cant help but continue to lick , suck n kiss all about your ankle, i imagine ur gold/silver lil anklet has his name awn it cuz he doesnt want u to tattoo his name :<< , but his lips smooth there way up to your inner thighs and hes pullin ur panties to the side so his thick lips can sink into ur thick lips as he slowly jus... makes out wit ur cunt idk if i can even call it 'eating out' anymore, hes in luv with ur pussy. obsessed wit the way u smell down there actually. fuck a roses and flowers smell bitch he is stealin yo panties after a LONG day at work tf 😭 he jus like me fr ok ok.

i jus luv a soft sex moment, his tongue mixes wit u sooo well and ur whines are of no use to him cuz he's havin fun and everythings jus so... slow and relaxed. ur grindin up into his face slow too cuz what else can u do but relax and just let your man do his thing. hes laying his upper body into you, drinkin ur squirt when u cum and mushin his face all in ur cream when u do orgasm, its long and drawn out and so. good.

then he pulls u back in the water wit him, slippin his dick in u fluidly, connecting u both and honestly yall sit there for a good minute. just basking in each others immaculate warmth. the fuck is dragging , sloww and aching but neither of u care to move faster. ur holdin the edge of the tub and hes holdin ur legs up to your shoulders , usin each other as leverage to fuck into the other slow and deep. low moans r harmonizing wit each other and its just... perfect :(

all thruought the fuck n i cannawwt stress this enuf he is kissin on u , he cant help it. he revels in kissin all over ur face and lips even if ur too far gone to kiss him back , kissin on ur neck and ur tits that are all squished together cuz of the position annnnd kissin on ur thighs and ur legss as theyre so far up he can reach em wit his mouth. he presses kisses on ur head too . u deserve it :(( ohh u deserve it so bad and its moments like these that i luv always.

even when u guys cum , ur lips are locked and ur swallowing each others moans, and breathin hot in each others mouths when ur done.

why is this so long notice how i cant shut tf up ab soft sex ???? bye yall !

[celestie0]

Imagine reader pulling up to one of gojos games wearing a cheerleader outfit w the colour of his team and a jersey w his number one it and she’d have her hair a pony tail with ribbion that match the uniform 😭😭 i can see gojo being distracted from his game Bcs he saw her like that and he probs messes up ☠️☠️ bros about to get an ear-full from coach yaga

AAAAAAAAAA honestly i feel like it would be so out of character for kickoff reader to do something like this but also ✋🏼😫 i need her to just take one for the team (lol pun intended) so that i can write a oneshot where they fuck in the mens locker room after the game cuz gojo just cannot beleive she’d dress like that n sexually frustrate the fuck outta him during an important match n he loses all sense of self control the second he gets off the field 🙁🙁🙁😞😞😞…………im clenched rn

we’ll just say she’s ovulating that week or sumn n it possesses her to wear a skimpy cheerleading costume for a day 🤣🤣

i’m adding this to my ever long list of oneshot ideas 😖😖😖

[silverflqmes]

໒⦂ 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐂𝐒.

notes. reposted from wp!

genre. fluff + crack

ft. tooru oikawa, tetsuro kuroo, yuji terushima, yu nishinoya, shoyo hinata, daichi sawamura, kenma kozume, hajime iwaizumi, issei matsukawa + takahiro hanamaki, kotaro bokuto, tobio kageyama, atsumu miya, osamu miya, eita semi

gender neutral! reader

     ➫    𝓞𝗜𝗞𝗔𝗪𝗔   𝓣𝗢𝗢𝗥𝗨   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  he would definitely take you out to get milk bread with him before taking you in his car to go to his special spot where he admires the stars

⌗  seeing as oikawa is a total geek who believes in aliens, i'm sure some part of him also finds astronomy interesting so he'll definitely start going on about that

⌗  "ahh y/n-chan! i'm so glad you're okay with this, iwa-chan's always making fun of me for liking this kind of stuff!!"

⌗  while you guys could just lay down on the grass — he prefers wrapping his arms around you and resting your head on his chest

⌗  "i'd say you're as pretty as the stars, but it'd take an infinite amount of them to compare to you, y/n-chan~"

     ➫    𝓚𝗨𝗥𝗢𝗢   𝓣𝗘𝗧𝗦𝗨𝗥𝗢   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  cat café for sure, then movies at home;  i don't make the rules 😗✨

⌗  you'd think he was bringing you there to pet cats and stuff but in all honesty — he wants to do it just as bad

⌗  "oya? y/n-chan, you should totally try these ears on, hmm? it'd be a cute look for ya~ i'm sure the team would enjoy it. wouldn't you agree?"

⌗  the teasing would never end, i can tell you that at least..

⌗  after you guys finish up — with kuroo complaining about wanting to take all the cats home, you two end up snuggling on his couch with hot coco while putting on all the classic and iconic movies 😌

    ➫    𝓣𝗘𝗥𝗨𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗠𝗔   𝓨𝗨𝗝𝗜   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  i hope you guys know how to skateboard cuz —

⌗  you can't tell me he won't take you to a skating park. i mEaN loOk aT hIM😭

⌗  if you don't know how to skate he'll definitely take the time to teach you, ofc while holding your hand so you don't fall and hurt yourself. surprisingly — he's hella patient when it comes to you.

⌗  "don't push yourself too hard y/n, i wouldn't want you to fall for me all over again!" — he would totally laugh and use cheesy pickup lines but you still love his dumbass😌

⌗  once the sun sets, y'all would definitely take cute pictures before heading off to buffalo wild wings or sumn to get sum dinner

     ➫    𝓝𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗢𝗬𝗔   𝓨𝗨   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  why go to one place for a date when you can fit like ten different dates into one?

make sure you slept the night before cuz this boy is taking you EVERYWHERE and you already know he has a never ending source of energy😭 you might need to stop for a coffee at some point — bUT DON'T GIVE ANY TO NOYA.

⌗  "y/n-chan we're totally going swimming, to the amusement park, the mall — OH AND WE NEED TO GET GARIGARIKUN POPSICLES!!"

⌗  he'll drag you everywhere, but you're happy to get tired as long as you're with him and having fun🥺💗

⌗  after going to like ten different places, the last destination would be at sakonoshita's where you guys would have your popsicles together and share a kiss ♡︎

     ➫    𝓗𝗜𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗔   𝓢𝗛𝗢𝗬𝗢   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  the amusement park, that's where he's taking you — but first, he'll ask you to set for him at the park before going LMAO

⌗  on his way to pick you up he'll bring you meat buns while asking you to hop on his bike with him to go set at the park🥺

⌗  surprisingly the amusement park isn't all that far away and you guys manage to get there early enough to get stamps + tickets so you can try all sorts of rides out

⌗  just like he gets nervous for matches , he gets nervous for rides.. please take him to the bathroom before he finds another scary tall ass mf —

⌗  "y/n-channn this embarrassing.. i can go on my own y'know! i doubt dai ou-sama's here today.." — idc if he says no, go with him😐

     ➫    𝓢𝗔𝗪𝗔𝗠𝗨𝗥𝗔   𝓓𝗔𝗜𝗖𝗛𝗜   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  alright dadchi here is hella classy, so he'd either take you to a really fancy dinner or — dinner at home cuz he can definitely cook :D

⌗  he'd pick you up from your house and say hi to your parents while assuring he'd take care of you🥺

⌗  he'd get you roses for sure or some sort of pretty flowers 😭💘💘

⌗  "wow i thought these were beautiful when i got them for you, but they could never compare to you, y/n" — he'd be blushing too, daichi doesn't use a lotta pickup lines 😭

because my man knows chivalry and how to be a gentleman, he'd pay and even get you a dessert to split together :'o

     ➫    𝓚𝗢𝗭𝗨𝗠𝗘   𝓚𝗘𝗡𝗠𝗔   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  after successfully dragging kenma away from his gaming console, you end up taking him to an arcade. it's a small improvement, okay??

⌗  he's reluctant, but sometimes going to retro arcades can be fun and they have GOOD ASS snacks so he luckily wasn't all that difficult with you — you'd have to tell kuroo about this later cuz 🕺🏽✨

⌗  after playing a bunch of fighting games and even air hockey — you end up dragging his ass to dance dance revolution😭

⌗  "y/n you do realize i can hardly roll out of bed, you really expect me to do this?"

⌗  he complains a little at first, but after dancing a few rounds, you coulda sworn you saw his lips curl up a just a little 👀

    ➫    𝓘𝗪𝗔𝗜𝗭𝗨𝗠𝗜   𝓗𝗔𝗝𝗜𝗠𝗘   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  i feel like iwa would take you to the park for a cute picnic. simple, but sweet

⌗  he'd bring a whole picnic basket with snacks and i headcannon that he can cook, so he definitely made sumn

⌗  because he isn't good with romance, he reluctantly went to tooru for help — who could NOT stop running his mouth.. he got hit with a volleyball afterwards tho😔

⌗  "so i went to that trashykawa for help, what does it matter?! i wanna be able to make shit nice for you!" — iwa are you blushing??🤨

⌗  i imagine there somehow being fireworks that night — don't ask me why and he'd totally lean in to share a kiss with you — while you're caught off guard ofc🚶‍♂️

     ➫    𝓜𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗦𝗨𝗡   &&   𝓜𝗔𝗞𝗞𝗜   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  ramen date for sure cuz mattsun is lazy but wants some good ass food and who doesn't like ramen😗

⌗  lowkey feel like y'all would run into makki who just — ends up joining your date 😭 oh to be blessed by the presence of matsuhana✨

⌗  these two would seem normal at first , definitely no bad intentions until you see less noodles in your bowl each time you look from one to the other😐

⌗  "it was makki / mattsun —  " in sync :^

⌗  honestly your date with them is just pure crackheaded energy.. but you have a good time with them and they end up walking you home where you kiss both their cheeks before going inside🥺💘

     ➫    𝓑𝗢𝗞𝗨𝗧𝗢   𝓚𝗢𝗧𝗔𝗥𝗢   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  y'all are going to get sum good ass bbq at a secret but underrated place in tokyo✨

⌗  this crackheaded owl will definitely show up to your house uninvited and drag your ass out cuz he's cool with your family😭

⌗  "y/n-chan i'm amazing aren't i?! even akaashi said this was a good idea!"

⌗  he would talk your whole ear off about his accomplishments in volleyball and would even start talking about akaashi LMAO but you find it cute to watch him be so positive and energetic

⌗  please watch your food cuz you already know he's gonna grab those chopsticks and snatch every piece even out of arm's reach🖐

     ➫    𝓚𝗔𝗚𝗘𝗬𝗔𝗠𝗔   𝓣𝗢𝗕𝗜𝗢   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  mr. awkward here doesn't know any better so he bought tickets to a professional volleyball match😪

⌗  he's just a lil blueberry who loves his milk and you can't possibly say no to him, so of course you go. surprisingly it's extremely fun and watching him light up like a little kid is just the cutest sight

⌗  "  i.. dumbass, i'm not blushing!" yeah ok

⌗  you'd tease him for sure after the match finishes and in response — ah.. expect him to get you back for that later😭

⌗  since he found it a little selfish that he made you do something of his interests, he ends op offering to buy you ice cream at a cute vintage parlor so y'all can take cute pictures of sharing ice cream ✨

     ➫    𝓜𝗜𝗬𝗔   𝓐𝗧𝗦𝗨𝗠𝗨   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  did someone say beach?

⌗  okay but fr — he wants to take you to the beach and even try out volleyball on the sand there too — aside from swimming ofc and possibly dragging you to try out some kind of crazy watersport😭

⌗  y'all would have some seafood in a cute little restaurant on the beach and have snowcones afterwards

⌗  "oh? y/n-chan, you've got a little something there," he says this as he wipes your cheek and totally gives you the side eye while licking his finger😐

⌗  you already know this man finna come from behind, wrap his arms around your waist and sprint to the shore as he tosses you in before joining🐒

    ➫    𝓜𝗜𝗬𝗔   𝓞𝗦𝗔𝗠𝗨   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  i feel like osamu would like to spend your date together at home with takeout — probably chinese and i don't blame him😍

⌗  y'all would play some board games together — with you complaining halfway about losing monopoly to him for the 36289292th time🧎

⌗  y'all would stay up LATE just playing those games and then watching movies afterwards

⌗  LOTS of snacks and we can't forget that glorious takeout food. he'd make tea somewhere in between too

⌗  "y/n, i understand you want to win, but we can't play all night y'know — you need your rest for tomorrow."

     ➫    𝓢𝗘𝗠𝗜   𝓔𝗜𝗧𝗔   ୨୧   ˎˊ˗

⌗  do not tell me he does NOT have money — hE GOES TO SHIRATORIZAWA COME ON Y'ALL

⌗  he's taking you to the mall cuz he wants to shop for some new clothes and spoil you rotten, i mean it —

⌗  you'd try and hold the bags at the very least since he paid for everything, but in the end he ends up taking everything in one hand and uses his free one to hold yours🥺

⌗  "hey, if i'm taking out, i'll treat you like complete royalty," get your sunglasses ready for that smile you guys —

⌗  after a good two hours of shopping, he'll take you to a cute bakery nearby and split your favorite dessert with you ♡︎

notes. reviving the hq tag? ahahaha.. anyway don’t mind any typos these are old asf..

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[seokjinsonlyone]

btw i love how accurately you depict each member cuz 99% of bloggers here make bts seem like discord daddies 😭

but who do you think in bts would be the scariest in an argument with their partner?

to me, I feel like the maknae line would be scary if you made them angry enough like imagine jk swole tatted ass yelling at you and having you backed into a corner idk

listeeeennnn as sexy as they can be sometimes, me and the tannies just go back way too far to only see them in that occasional state of being like… i’ve seen jimin kick himself out of a chair and hobi play celine dion out his nostril on a recorder like u just gotta be fr from time to time 🫡 that being said

i don’t think jk would be the scariest like he may be big nd buff but he’s still a baby our kookoo baby star candy angel prince puppy would get more upset than anything in an argument like i can see him just getting really exasperated if he was tryna explain himself to you but you won’t hearing or believing him like he’ll be more ready to cry than anything like he’s just so accustomed to being our baby light bulb funky little pop star golden maknae that he’s just used to sitting there and taking it so i really believe that in an argument he wouldn’t be that aggressive however i do think that if you pushed him hard enough he would get loud wit you for a second just to shut you up before you make him reach his limit. scary meter: [5/10]

you know who i do think is really scary tho? hobi 😳. he may be all smiles and giggles and sunshine but when you piss him off the dark clouds roll in fr 😬 like say the wrong thing on the right day and you gon be in for something treacherous keep in mind this the same man that threw a banana at jungkook like the last time i heard of throwing a banana at someone was in mario kart now i can’t really see him raising his voice but he WILL back u into a corner like i have a clear vision of him red in the face gritting his teeth spewing straight up venom if y’all get into it real bad. scary meter: [9/10]

now when you think about a bangtan fight it seem like jimin always at the scene of the crime. u got the mandu incident, the time him nd jungkook got into it nd ended up hugging in the rain, on burn the stage when tae nd seokjinnie was having it out he was scolding them afterwards like he just always there for a tussle. so when i imagine fighting with jimin i can just see you popping off on him saying this and that and him talking over you saying this and that until you say sumn crazy and he gon tell you to watch your mouth, get fed up and tell you to leave him alone and don’t call him or something, and then try to storm out (and that’s when you grab his wrist before he makes it out the room and kiss him on da mouf and let him push you up against a wall and y’all make up 😏 way before y’all come to an agreement). scary meter: [6/10]

i think if you were to fight with seokjin i can’t say for surely that it would be super scary but by NO MEANS will it be a pretty sight to see. like we know he like to run his mouth so if y’all fighting he gon get to talking fast neck and ears gonna be red and whatever he saying to you it’s gonna be MEAN if you push him there he will raise his voice but i think that’s about it like your feelings gonna be super hurt at the end of it bc he know exactly which buttons to push but if you’re ever scared it’s gonna be bc you think he leaving bc one thing about seokjin is he not afraid to cut a person off. scary meter: [4/10]

yoongi wouldn’t hurt a fly nor would he give the impression that he would hurt a fly like yeah he's agust d and we’ve seen that the inner rage does exist but he the embodiment of the pen is mightier than the sword like if anything his anger runs cold like you can go ahead with the fussing and fighting and yelling crying carrying on but he not wit da dramatics you can talk to him or you can go somewhere he not doing all that so would he be scary in an argument? nah. scary meter: [3/10]

joonie is a big buff man real tall and muscly but that’s not what makes him scary bc as big and buff as he is he is equally kind and gentle but there's a definite streak of unrefined aggression that lives within him and if you ever tapped into that it'd be bad bc it's like he holds back so much that when the flood gates open you will drown like downturned eyebrows nose scrunched up red in the face volume at 100 he's gesturing wildly got you backed in the corner ya know the WORKS but i do think it'd be a real quick burst tho like he's gonna absolutely lose it for all of a minute before regaining control of his emotions and he'd apologize for talking to you like that immediately. scary meter: [7/10]

hands down 100% tae is the scariest member to fight with like i'm specifically thinking of that time that rumor was being spread and he went on weverse saying he wish he could like stab the reporters with needles or something like that like if at all possible DO NOT piss him off because he is just so firm in all his beliefs and convictions like he is not backing down and i think he is also the most dramatic so if you take him there he's going to make the most of it like it'd be a steady build up him just continuously getting more and more upset until he's stomping around yelling at you like there's slamming doors and harsh words i wouldn't put it above him to punch a hole in the wall depending on the severity of the situation just like he is naawwwttt the one. scary meter: [10/10]

a/n: AGAIN SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO RESPOND TO THIS forgive me 🥺🤲 ALSO LISTEN can not say for surely how firm MY beliefs in this take are bc like i just am not intimidated by people like they just aren't scary to me unless they carrying a gun that's the only time i be scared 💀

[raidenbuddha]

Jack Hanma:Beauty and the Beast pt 2

“Jack!! Wait up!” “Why can’t you keep up with me?” “Cuz you’re toooo big.” “Oh really, what about me is big.” He said with a sly grin. With the innuendo going over her head she responded “Your extremely tall, and looks at your legs. I can’t keep up!” “How bout i do you a solid.. I’ll carry you?” “OH Y-YES! Please.” “Well since you asked so nicely.” Then suddenly jack swooped her up and positioned her to where her legs were around his waist.

“This is kind of um.. I um jack.” “You need to annunciate babe.” “The um you know position I’m in is Uh.. There’s something poking me.” “OH FUCK! I’m sorry Rosie..” “It’s alright! I get kinda excited around you too.” “WAIT I SAID THAT OUTLOUD!!” “Yeah you did but I don’t mind much But don’t push it.. I can’t restrain myself from you for long” “That’s good then jack.. say this THING poking me feels kinda big.” “So now you know what that meant. REALLY ROSALIE?!” He joked.

“and down you go.” “AWW but I wanna be carried more.” “That can be arranged after a little sumn special if you know what I mean.” “OH MY GOD JACK!! STOPP PLAYING WITH ME!!” she yelled while blushing profusely.He noticed her just yelling at him, not noticing the beauty in front of her. “Turn around!” he said. There she was met with one of the most beautiful waterfalls she’d ever seen. Mini pools and immense lush flora filled the area.

“Oh jack this is so beautiful..” she said with a warm smile. You can’t be smiling around me like that I don’t deserve it. “Thank you so so much! I haven’t seen anything like this since my time on the island. I’m in love.” When she’d run to jack and engulfed him her warm embrace he just melted. This newfound sensation reminded him of his mother.

Jack had always felt that his sole purpose was to avenge his mother by defeating yujiro hanma and he’d do anything to achieve that goal. He didn’t deserve her… To Rosalie’s surprise there stood the 8 foot tall Jack Hanma crying from her touch. “Jack.. what’s wrong? Is it me?” “Of course it isn’t. I just don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve your affection or anything of the matter. I-I’m a monster.”

“Oh..jack.. you’re not a monster. You’re a man with a purpose. A man with a lifestyle you plan to uphold. Jack you’re so handsome and passionate. No matter what you or believe say I’ll always think of you that way. Besides, if it’s the height, I like climbing trees.” He let out a boastful laugh. “Thank you Rosalie.. for everything.” “What can I say.. I beat your ass so badly and you took me on this delightful date so it’s merited.”

“Jack I was thinking.. Do you wanna go on a second date with me?” “Oh I-uh um OF COURSE!” He whisked her into the air and in the heat of the moment he kissed her. She was taken aback for a second while he apologized, but she kissed him back. “Wow jack who knew you were so smooth.” She said as she broke the kiss. “I uh obviously..Only fa you Rosalie.” She chuckled.

“uP CArrY mE JAckiE BoY!” “Alright rosa.” I-I haven’t heard that name since.. “GYAHH!!” She yelled. “W-why are you runnin-Ning !!” “Well get back faster this way?” He replied. “You gotta have a tough stomach, you took my kicks so well.” “H-hAH” “JACK HAMMERR PUT ME DOWN!” “Alrighty then” “W-woah the world is spinning.” “How about you get carried o my back? It’s like climbing a tree lol?”

“S-sure pick me up tho pweeez?!” He hoisted her onto his back. The height difference was so ginormous that she looked like a child even a backpack on this man. The two got stares from passerby’s but jack paid no mind because today if only for one day, Rosalie was his. In his mind she was practically his wife already

But to Rosalie, even with her flirtatious nature with him something was holding her back, or rather the reminiscence of someone. “Alright this is my street! Thanks jack I had a wonderful time… I hope to see you again.” “Likewise doll face, see ya soon.” And with that the beast of a man walked off, leaving her heart empty but hopeful for the next time the two met.

Would they intertwine hands? Would they passionately kiss each other?! Would they cuddle, get food, or walk with each other? These were all questions she was asking herself (Of course jack was thinking this too ) But she suddenly was interrupted by her apartment door being cracked open.

She figured it might’ve been an animal or anything really. A burglar she could defend off anyways and she didn’t have anything to steal so it wasn’t that seri- “Mi queirida there you are!! How I’ve missed you so much.” My past lover Jun Guevara is standing in front of me

“Jun? Is that really you?” “Of course it is Rosa.. Mi reina how’ve you been? I’ve broken out of prison as you see!” “I um have been fine. I really missed you and it just hurt..” “is that why you moved away? I tried the island before coming here but your family pointed me in the right direction.

“Actually a boy I’d met in prison informed me of your wearabouts. Said you fought again? Used the moves I’d thought you?!” “I just knew you still loved and remembered me..” “Jun, I’ve I’ve moved on.. Seeing you here has reminded me of the good and all the bad.. I can’t do it Jun, not again and not with you…”

“Is that the man you were talking to? I’m not intimidated by him. I will harm/kill him if I need to Rosa. Then we can be together again!” “N-no! I don’t want you to hurt him!” She sobbed lightly. “Mi queirida why do you cry? I just want to be with you again. Let’s run away together! What if we just live a quiet life, settle down? As long as I’m with you.”

“Rosalie?” A voiced behind the door called. The man with the familiar voice walked in.. it was jack. “I left my bag with you- who’s this?” “This is um Jun Guevara.. my ex.” “No we technically never broke up mi amor.” “YOU WENT TO PRISON!” “Wait is this the other guy? Telling me you’ve moved on? I saw your diary and that’s a load of bullshit.”

“YOU READ MY DIARY!!?” “Every word especially the last page you wrote.. ‘I want to be with jack so badly but my heart still yearns for him. Why are things never going the way they planned..’” “THATS PARAPHRASED!!” “Wait I’m the other guy? YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR FOR ME?” interjected jack.

“apparantly she does and I see no reason why. She’s my mujer, mi esposa.” “I’m not your woman or wife, not anymore.” “And I like jack because he’s funny, cute, and thinks about me and shows me affection.” “I show You affection, think about you constantly! What does he have that I don’t?” “My heart.” The two men gasped in awe. “I’ll win you back..no matter what I have to do Rosa… You’ve seen it first hand.” “No PLEASE!” “Adios mi amor, see you soon.” As soon as he left Rosalie broke down in tears running to jack. “J-jack don’t let him hurt you.. and don’t let him take me away. I don’t want to be away from you.. I’m strong but he’s stronger just please protect me” she looked up at him with with teary eyes and a tear stained face.

The normally angry steroids man couldn’t help but feel pain.. something in familiar to him. Empathy was the word. He wasn’t a woman. He wasn’t in drama (other than steroid shit and fighting). But she seemed to love him and he obviously loved her. He’d do anything to protect her.

“jack.. I think it’s time I told you my full past.. it might help or not but it will feel good to get it off my chest.” “Um alright Rosalie..?” “Jack when I was around 3 I was enrolled into the martial arts. By the time I was 10 I was already teaching classes. My progression had come further than anyone’s in the history of the island.. except for him. Jun Guevara’s.”

“We’d met in a competition. We were at the time 12 and he beat me 201-120 points. I felt dishonored.. people thought it was normal as he was a boy but I felt I had to be better than him. However a change of plans occurred when he wanted to be my friend. Friendships came and went all around but we stood strong. That’s when he asked me to be his girlfriend.”

“Soon Jun began pirating and I’d go on voyages with him. We’d travel the world and see sights one could only dream of, but I wasn’t happy. I was killing.. I was stealing.. is this what it meant to be the best? Then he started getting more forceful. Pressuring me into things like sex… It felt out of lust not his real love for me.. and it broke me.”

“Eventually when Bosch threatened the island jun held his family captive after brokering into the White House and threatening them. And threatening the nation, jun was sent to prison. I knew he could escape whenever he wanted but still. The letters were too much. His obsession over me was too much. I just stopped responding and eventually I left my life of fighting and pirating behind.”

A/N I’m sooo sorry fr 😭 this weeks been mad hectic and this was the only writing time I had. New part coming by Wednesday

[materialgworlas]

Hey Siri how long has it been Sense

Materialgworlas posted

Siri: playing material girls by saucy Santana on Apple Music

Me:pauses music

You get what I’m try to say tho bestie YOU HAVENT GAVE US ANY SAUCE WERES THE SAUCE Please hook a sister up post POST PLEASE

Visitors From The Future- Satoru Gojo x Fem!reader

Synopsis: M kinda loving the whole Y/n gojo roommate canon so imam stick w it for now. SO imagine like u n gojo be arguing again, over sumn domestic like the nasty mf leavin skid marks or smthg😭 AND THENNN yall interrupted by sm1 at the door and its future nanami n yo future kids w gojo (Cuz of some mission into da future that takes place in da past… uh… YK WHAT FUCK THE LOGISTICS MAN JUST ALLOW IT). And gojo be smug as hell cuz he already got a lil crush on u so knowing yall get busy in da future is a major confidence boost.

GOJO AF

And like u in denial cuz u been resisting the urge to jump in this blind mice ahh mf’s bones for AGES

YO MANS😫😫

 anddddd u kinda feeling geto rn but yo kids r cute so u aint really complaining. And it’s just future nanami tired as hell cuz yo kids got gojo’s energeticness and ur stubbornness so they can’t be reasoned w😍

pov its bedtime🥰

JORDANA BBG HERE U GOOOOO😁 IM EXPECTING MY COMMISION IN DMS👹👹(yk what im talkin ab)

warning: uh da n-word? sm foul language, the readers black, gojo be simpin then foul at the end, poor suguru just wanted nyash, nanami deserves better than designated nanny AHAH GET IT NANANNY-MI REHEHEHE IM SO FUNNY-

☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

“I SWEAR TO GOD IMMA MURDER THIS FOOL!”

“Eughhhhh it’s not even that bad-“

“WDYM NOT THAT BAD MAN U SHAT UP THE WHOLE KITCHEN!!”

“Mf actin like its on the walls”

“…”

“What-“

“WHO THE FUCKKKK DO U THINK CLEANS THE DAMN APARTMENT GOJO!”

“Gojo?? I thought we were at that ‘Satoru’ level-“

“NIGGA STFU! Yo crusty ahh been fucking up my damn kitchen for WAY too long! Clean yo shit mf, last I checked slavery was over!”

“This is why we should get a maid.”

“WITH WHAT FUNDS!??!?! WE BROKE STUDENTS!”

“phhfft speak for yourself, im loaded.”

“Correction, was loaded. Until yo parents got tired of funding ur dookie lifestyle n cut you off.”

“…”

“reheh, gotcha nigga.”

“Ughhhhh I hate this.”

“Oh and u think I like wasting my breath?? Mf just clean the damn mess you made so ion have to yell.”

 “yeah, u only be yelling for Suguru these days...”

“NIGGA WHAT??”

“…” “U WANNA SAY THAT TO MY FACE U POMPOUS  CANT DO SHIT LIMP DICCK BEADY EYED FREAKK WITH YO WHITE HAIR GOT U LOOKING LIKE AN OLD ASS  EGG HEADED SLENDER MAN! CLEAN YO MAN MESS OR FUCKING LEAVE!” you practically roared, heavily breathing whilst a shocked Gojo stared at your angered form

Great, now you’ve done it

“yk what fuck this shit, I’m heading out.” you huffed before storming off to your room to get changed

You always take things too far, don’t you satoru. And the worst part is I only made that mess cause I was tryna make that weird dish Y/n loves, but I fucked it up n got embarrassed. God I gotta let go of this petty crush, I mean- shes literally hooking up with my best friend, by definition that should make Y/n off limits. But I just… She just so smart n funny n GAHD DAYM THAT ASS PHATT- but all I manage to do is piss her off. EUGH curse these damn feelings! Maybe ill call hoe#2 later to de-stress, she doesn’t mind when I say the wrong name at least-

“You gon get the door or not!?”

Your yell from the other room had broken through Gojo’s thoughts, now aware of the ringing the 6’3 man lumbered to the door

“Oh yeh nanamin-“

“DADDY!”

Gojo’s greeting had been cut off by the shrill of the two young children that clung to Nanami’s frame, eagerly reaching out to touch him. “May we come inside.” The weary blond spoke, waiting patiently for his ‘friend’ to move aside allowing him to enter, the two infants in tow.

“who was at the door-“you padded into the living room, dressed much nicer than before, stopping short seeing your best friend, Nanami, and the two children in his arms. “Mini, who’s black babies are these” you chortled

“MAMA!” The children wailed, squirming hard enough to break free from Nanami’s hold and rush to you.

“The fu-“

“Y/N! no cussing in front of the kids!” Gojo hissed, you rolled your eyes but relented. Turing your attention to the children clinging to your legs

“these babies kidna cute.” You muttered

“I KNOW RIGHT!!” Gojo cooed, tickling the younger girl who let out a happy squeal

“I should hope you find your own children cute.” Nanami said, in his matter of fact tone, as if he aint dropped a phatt ass spoiler in yo lives.

“My own children- huh?”

“Yes, myself, Kasumi and Saku are from the future. They are your children.” Mf dropping bomb after bomb without a second thought THAT’S how tired he is.

OUR WHAT? KIDS? U MEAN I- SHITTT, I have so many questions! When do we get together? Are we still together?? Do we get married?? Wait he said from the future- just how far into the future we talking??? How long I gotta wait to dick Y/n down n make my Gojo army... Saku’s got Y/ns smile and Kasumi got her… well everything. Damn I really lucked out-

So many thoughts in Gojo’s head. Yet all he could muster was,

“Huh… come to think of it you do look a lil older to how I remember.” Trying to keep his composure whilst he did internal backflips

Our kids? You mean me and this dusty- who am I kidding GORGEOUS idiot fuck?? AND I POP OUT TWO OF HIS EGG HEADED BABIES?? I mean, when?? Where?? why?? I mean sure the niggas fine but uh me n Geto kinda… well its complicated. But DAMN if these babies aren’t the cutest lil shit I ever seen. Saku’s got Gojos big ahh blue bug eyes but he makes em work w his brown skin n adorable lil afro… he can’t be more than 6 I’d say. AND OH MY LIFE KASUMI IS ADORABLE EHEHEH, she gets her cuteness from her mama let’s not lie but her beautiful curled her got white locks that fit her so well. Ehehe yk what, I’m not mad.

“Mama, no angy?” Kasumi babbled

“Huh- why would I be angry??”

“C-cause we twied to make (insert favourite food🥰) n-nd made biggggggggggg mess.” Saku said, peering at you with those beautiful blue eyes.

“Dadda’s dia!” Kasumi pointed to Gojo who picked up the happy girl

“Dadda’s what?” he hummed

“SUMI’S RIGHT W-WE ONLY DID IT CAUSE-BECAUSE DADDY SAID YOU’D LIKE IT!”

Gojo rn:🧍🏾‍♀️

“You were tryna make (favourite food)? N made a big mess…” now u aint the brightess when it comes to this shit but even you could connect the dots.

Now the famous Satoru Gojo, strongest sorcerer, was shying away from the knowing look you gave him. his cheeks dusted with an embarrassing amount of pink as he used Kasumi’s chubby body to shield himself.

YOU AF

Your cute lil moment was cut short by Nanami’s haggard snores, the poor man was sprawled on your couch. If it weren’t for his aggressive ass noises, you’d think the mf was dead😭

“Um- er, well they can’t exactly leave until Nanami’s awake…” Gojo started

“True, and it’d be cruel to wake him… he looks so tired.”

“…I guess we’ll have to look after the kids until he wakes up🥳🥳🥳. Oh well, HEY- who wants to teleport to Uncle Suguru n tell him the good news!!”

“Gojo you’re foul-“

“MEEEE!” Saku and Kasumi yelled in unison

“ALRIGHT LETS GO!😁”

GETO WHILE GOJO BE PARADING HIS HAPPY LIL FAMILY ON HIS LAWN

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ik its been a hot minute yall but dw ur warrior @jordanahart been on my ass everyday to post dis 😔✊🏾 1 man army fr

[dajaregambler]

HeliosR - Keith Max Card story ‘‘A way of spending valuable free time’’

Translation of Keith Max’ Lock On The Lost Night card story from ‘Helios Rising Heroes’.

Keith: …Haah

Keith: (Nothing beats smoking at yer own pace~)

Keith: (Got busy lately ‘cuz Brad’s been forcing me to attend meetings in the morning, or help him out with work….)

Keith: (Seriously been a while since I had the whole day off)

Keith: (Gonna drink as much as I want today~♪)

Keith: (I’ll go drop by this new bar that opened up recently, for starters)

-

Keith: (Uuh, if I ain’t wrong it’s in South’s---)

Brad: Keith

Keith: Ouah!? Brad…. What is it now, y’know I’m on break, yeah?

Brad: I know. Thanks to you taking care of some of my responsibilities, I have more than enough time to spare today.

Keith: Right. Then better take it easy for the entire day-----

Brad: This works out perfectly. I thought of using this time to attempt something I don’t usually do. You come with me.

Keith: Wha-!? Lemme at least rest to my heart’s content today…

Brad: Lend me a hand and I’ll buy you alcohol.

Keith: Eh…..!

Keith: …For real?

Brad: We’ll be heading to the shopping center now. Pick whatever alcohol you’d like there.

Keith: Basically tagging along for some shopping? Well, if it’s just that…

Brad: It’s decided. Get in the car.

Keith: Just so ya know, ‘m kinda in the mood for sumn’ expensive right now, ya get me~?

Brad: Not a problem. It’s all fine, just get in the car.

Keith: Yeah, yeah.

-

Keith: Say, know we're here for shopping, but what’cha buying? Somethin’ heavy to carry or?

Brad: No, it’s food. 

Keith: Aah, stocking up on frozen foods, eh

Brad: Wrong. There’s a meal I’d like to try out.

Keith: A meal? You gonna make it?

Brad: Obviously. That’s why I asked for your help.

Keith: Ah, I get it now…

-

Brad: Bonito flakes… must be this.

Brad: And then kombu….

Keith: (......All them ingredients he’s been stuffing in his basket for a while now, could that mean….)

Brad: There’s several variations of miso. Red, white, mixed….

Keith: Don’t tell me, yer gonna be making Japanese food!?

Brad: I am

Keith: How many times have I told ya now before, Japanese food’s a major pain in the ass, yanno

Brad: That’s why I thought I should try making it myself. And you could help me---

Keith: Wha-!? Why the hell do I suddenly have to help out, quit messing with me!

Keith: Setting other foods aside, I draw the line at Japanese. Yer ruining my whole day off. No way in hell I’mma help ya out

Brad: …….

Keith: …What. Scowl all ya want, I ain’t gon’ yield-----

Brad: Well, it’s fine. I can make it on my own too.

Keith: ….Eh

Brad: It’s an occasional day off. Struggling with cooking ought to be another way of meaningfully spending my time.

Brad: Having this opportunity was possible due to you taking care of work in my stead.

Keith: ….

Brad: No worries. I will buy you alcohol as promised---

Keith: Ah geez, I get it! I freaking get it! I’ll lend a hand!

Brad: ……..

Keith: You better drink with me as compensation. And stick with me till I’m satisfied!

-

Brad: Keith, remove the kombu before the pot boils for the kombu stock.

Keith: Yeah, I know. Heard ya loud and clear. You watch out it don’t boil over there.

Brad: No, the recipe calls for it to simmer on high heat---

Keith: Even so, that’s gon’ mess up the whole flavor. We’re using a different fish than the one in the recipe, it’ll taste terrible if we don’t adjust to it

Brad: I see. Then this pan here is for skimming. 

Keith: Don’t remove too much stock now. S’gonna disappear before you know it

Keith: Ack, lower the flame…..!

Brad: ….!

Keith: Even if high heat is spelled out word for word, stoves have different power in different places.

Brad: That makes sense.

Keith: Sigh…. This is why Japanese food’s a pain in the ass…

-

Keith: Uwah, it’s gotten this late already….

Keith: (Spent the whole day cooking in the end…)

Brad: Clear soup, simmered vegetables, fish boiled in soy sauce. The menu came out as planned.

Keith: Ooh~ Got anxious if it’d come out decent while making it, but arranging the plates makes ‘em look the part.

Brad: It smells nice too. While we did not go as far as a restaurant in Little Tokyo, it does resemble it quite well.

Keith: We only made enough for the both of us, so let’s eat up. Or else Dino and the others are gonna be up in arms when they’re back.

Brad: Yes. Let’s dig in.

Brad: From the clear soup first…

Keith & Brad: …..

Brad: A nice flavor.

Keith: Heh, it really packs a punch

Brad: The fish goes well with the rice.

Keith: Them simmered dishes are tasty too…. Pairs great with a drink

Brad: Indeed…

Keith: Now haven’t ya been constantly helped by me lately? Sticking with me for just one round of drinks ain’t gonna cut it, y’know

Brad: Yes, you have a point

Keith: Say what’cha want, it’s as I… huh?

Brad: To be able to eat such delicious Japanese cuisine, I made the right call to ask for your help.

Keith: ……!

Brad: You have my thanks, Keith

Keith: H-hey now, where’s this coming from…

Keith: You got another favor up your sleeve that ya wanna throw at me or what? Can’t you leave it be and spare me already!?

Brad: I wonder?

Keith: Wha……

Brad: Your chopsticks stopped moving. Eat before it gets too cold.

Keith: …… Damnit, you tyrant.

[obae-me]

Not really an ask but I had a random thought~~

Yk a lot of the times I have seen that ppl really like belphie like, "Awww look he so baby <3" and even though I don't hate him I just have this REALLY strong desire to be petty with him. I think because he reminds me too much of my lil bro lmfao.

He is also like the baby of the house and he just lazes around the whole day not doing anything and my mom tells me to pick up his slack and doesn't really scold him for anything so I think that's the reason whenever I see belphie trying to flirt with the mc or telling us to do anything for him I wanna wipe that smug look off of his face and hide his cow pillow and also sabotage all his plans to prank lucifer just for the sake of being petty. I feel like whenever belphie acts like a little shit (affectionate lol cuz I do like him a lil bit when he's NOT being a little shit) I wanna drop him like a bunch of dominoes and throw him outta the window. K that might be a little extreme but squabbling with my little bro and fighting for literally everything over the years has made me petty as HELL. I WANT REVENGE CUZ THAT IDIOT KILLED ME. >:(

I think he once said "If you like me you get beel as a *bonus*" or sumn like that I can't find the screenshot ;-; and I legit went "oh- OH YOU THINK BEEL IS THE BONUS?! BITCH THE ONLY REASON I GOT YOU OUT OF THAT ATTIC IN THE FIRST PLACE WAS BECAUSE BEEL LIKED YOU (and how could I resist when he looked like a sad puppy). The only thing I like about you is your brother :)". Ughhhh I like him too but is too much to want to SQUEEZE the attitude out of that little gremlin like how he squeezed the life out of me :). I may have forgiven him but I'll never let him live this down cuz he reminds me too much of my annoying and spoiled rotten baby bro >:)

(sorry didn't intend on making this so long I just needed to vent :/ )

I don't think you're alone in feeling that way XD I know there are plenty of people and MCs in general that would give Belphie a taste of his own medicine.

I, alas, don't think I would be able to fully commit to the pettyness if I were in MCs shoes. As an eldest sibling, I think I'd give in and spoil him sometimes.

BUT I also think I'd order him around, which would probably annoy him, but sometimes I look at Belphie and feel like he deserves to be put in time-out, cus he's a little brat and he knows it.

He can have his pillow back once he's earned it.

[inkyquince]

ayup! so lately i have been thinking ab giving the LIs the remote to a vibe inside the PC so I am here to beg for crumbs plz \(u.u)/

my guy you gotta know that's a bad idea. look at your line up. This isn't gonna be a hot steamy piece like you're gonna get for like, the AOT guys or sumn.

content warning. Kylar being a creep, exhibitionism kinda, voyeurism, rough sex, implied dubcon/noncon.

You're gonna get a couple of hot bitches and the rest deserve the death penalty.

For example, Robin? Low confidence means they're gonna be sitting there, sweating their little sweat and SHAKING. Fully won't do it. Maybe turns it on once and quickly turns it off. It's like when the nerd couldn't even sip the tiddy milk. High confidence is more fun, but nothing will happen at school. You ever tried to masturbate next to high confidence Robin? AT LEAST KYLAR AND WHITNEY APPRECIATE THE SHOW, let me touch me peepee >:(((( (Doesn't help that im tryna seduce Winter while im doing it and Robin WON'T LET ME FUCKING-) Best you're gonna get is that you're going to absolutely suck ass when you two play on his console and they turn it way up when you're just about to beat them. Or during the movies. Maybe on a slow day at the stand.

Look, we all know Whitney is hot. Mean asshole, weird obsession with parasites, prime step-parent you hate material, the world's worst ex and partner. Yes I have a soft spot for @angrelysimpping's House Husband Whitney, yes, I love the thought of ex husband Whitney who is the worst, we exist... Where was I going with this?

Anyway, why would you do this. Whitney has one mode and they're also just gonna use one mode with the vibrator. Full speed, fastest mode, it's gonna be jumping around inside of you, its so likely that it'll run out of batteries before the day is out. Worst is when they get a lightbulb over their head on a friday morning and will have it on low during the first half of the lesson and then on fullspeed during the exam.

"What's that fucking buzzing noise?"

Whitney wants the attention on ya, they're gonna be the reverse version of that one asshole kid who reminds the teacher they had homework, except they're gonna be bugging River that they swear they can hear something. River gonna fucking think its your phone and demand you hand it over. When you explain you can't fucking afford a goddamn phone, you have rent due, you better hope that River just thinks Whitney is disrupting the exam instead of even thinking of a vibrator up you. Why? Because they will faint again and they're gonna come down and bust they head. Good work. You killed your FUCKING teacher.

Look, Eden's hot. Eden is also proud. More like your annoyed grandpa with technology. Will put on some half spectacles and squint at your phone when you're showing them a funny video. No, Eden, I don't know this person in the video, just watch the tiktok! Huge technophobe, which is neat cuz if you ever make them in the Sims 3, you can finally use that fucking trait.

Anyway, what are you tryna achieve? Yes, they like looking at you when half naked. No, they hate you getting pleasure from something other than them. Ever tried to masturbate in the spring? They're on that real quick. Smacking your hands away and all. Unless they're the one gripping the dildo that's obliterating your hole, or stuffing ya with anal beads, they're not gonna have fun with this. Unless you've been bad. Cuz then it's a punishment.

Oh, its before the stockholm syndrome era? Every time you fight that hunter, you gotta make a gamble that they haven't heard of sex toys yet. Gonna stuff you with the vibrator and leave you on the leash while doing their shit. Gonna have it on so hard that you're gonna go numb at some point.

After you think they're just lonely <3 it's... Better? You stayed away too long? Well, they're more in love and they just missed ya really. Also their property should stay on their fucking land. Go away too long and they're gonna stuff a vibrator in ya and spank ya and then go hunting with you still on the floor, buzzin away.

Also no, they won't take you with hunting with that inside of you. The deers will hear the buzzing and run away and you'll both be hungry.

Kylar is Kylar. Greasy little rat who asks for feet pics at 3 am, but you're asleep so they break in to take feet pics themselves. Won't even leave money in exchange. Also, sidenote, would pay for your onlyfans.

Anyway, they would almost drop the fucking remote when you give it to them. Dumbass. Probably says some whack shit like "I want to be the vibrator inside of you <3" and now you're thinking he either likes micro/macro or they're gonna break in and paint your vibrator to look like them and you're gonna get acrylic paint poisoning and you're going to explain that this all came from a terrible idea to your goddamn doctor. You want to be bending over for Harper while they stare at a rash that developed from chemical burns? No, didn't think so.

Worst of all, they're going to be a jealous little cunt and turn it way up when you sit with others. It's a reminder of them inside of you so you could be hanging out with Robin or Sydney and then the vibrator sparks to life and makes this the worst lunchtime in the world. It's their way of reminding you that you gave them the remote, that they're watching you.

And it's kinda cute. Until it buzzes to life while you're entertaining someone else in your room. They're watching you after all.

Avery? Babe, Avery has got you covered.

Like, they're not gonna use the vibrator when angry, so while its buzzing away, you know ya safe. When Avery's angry, they're punishing you and it's not a fun, teehee, punishment. They're gonna march you up to your goddamn science teacher and buy whips and flogs and take you back to the hotel and fuck ya up for making them so angry.

Anyway, the vibrator is gonna be switching between all modes at dinner, in the hot tub, on bed sheets, in the car, but not at the party. They're tryna win the goddamn dancing competition and loosing because you stumble over your feet with the vibrator buzz-buzz-buzzing away inside of you would be kinda funny but Avery likes their image too much.

Avery does love the vibrator. Really proves that you're theirs mind and body to play with and you giving the remote to them so readily puts them in a fabulous mood. They own you and they get to prove it with the vibrator.

Alex is busy, so ngl, they might forget about it. You'll be all teehee, they're playing the long game, and the farmer is legit wrestling a pig to stop it from eating their damn shorts.

But it's great payback when you usher him out of the shower when they walk in on you and you give a lil show but won't let them wash you. Also excellent when you give them head while they're on the phone.

Alex mainly gonna abuse that toy when making/eating breakfast with you, when you make them a cup of tea and when watching TV and snuggling. While also suddenly remember it when you're lounging under the tree and just !!! and turn it way up. What an asshole. Does make sure it's off when Remy is around. What a sweetheart.

Sydney, my beloved.

Pure Sydney aint touching that fucking thing. What did you expect. You'd give them the remote and they'd scream and throw it and faint and give it to Jordan to destroy in the fire. Sirris will tell them off, I have to give them a refund for their toy now! But Sydney will have no qualms and snuggle into bed with a clear conscious.

Corrupt Sydney? Fuck yeah. When you're giving them head under the desk in the library, when Leighton spanks you when you share the stolen book punishment with them, praying at the temple, its going to be buzzing away inside of you. Sydney will also be genuinely happy that you did this that they will randomly drop a kissy onto your lips. Asshole will also working their shift at the sex shop and brag to customers that "Yes, this model is very good, it's been inside my beloved the entire day and has yet to run out of batteries!". What a salesperson.

[celestie0]

THINKING ABT BRIDGETON AU GOJO BCS IM REWATCHING QUEEN CHARLOTTE A BRIDGETON STORY 😭🔥

Okay so Imagine Gojo is a duke in this AU and after the ball from my last Bridgestone gojo brain rot you guys starting spending more time together and getting to know each other and everyone who sees u guys together can literally feel the tension even his own mother feels it it’s like a Daphne and Simon kind of situation yk also Gojo stops visiting brothels after getting to know you and then one day during one of you’re guys hangouts he says he can’t see you anymore and that you deserve someone better than him who will be able to love you and like readers you’re like ?? Cuz like it don’t make no sense Like we were talking shit abt the ppl in ball and laughing together tf you mean 😭 and imagine you let him be and their is another ball this evening and a prince is their so you get all dressed up ans make sure you’re the prettiest girl in the room to make him jealous and you’re walking down the stairs and you catch the prince’s and Gojo attention and everybody is looking at you n the prince asks you to dance and Gojo gets jealous and storms outside even his mother is shocked so reader is dancing with the prince and she excuses herself to freshen up even tho she plans to see gojo and she goes outside and Gojo sees her and asks what she’s doing here and then she says she was looking for him and confronts him about him not wanting to marry her even tho she thought he was interested and then he says he is interested but she deserves someone who actually knows how to love her and that he isn’t the right man for her and that she deserved better and she says you are better and then Gojo steps closer and they finally kiss BUT they get caught by one of the girls that want to marry Gojo and she comes out from her hiding spot or sum shit and she threatens to expose them to the Ton if gojo doesn’t marry her so gojo decides to announce ur guys engagement at the ball and her plan backfires on her lady whistle down has a field trip with this one fr 😭😭 so many thoughts abt gojo rn it’s unreal 😔😫

bae isn't this just the entire plot of s1 brigerton??😂😂😂 ooo i like the twist of the girl that wants to marry him blackmailing him w the kiss eep i think itd be interesting if the plan didn't backfire right away n they would go through w that (gojo engaged to the other girl) just to save reader's reputation in the ton or sumn but then gojo just cant handle being engaged to a woman that isn't reader n is like 😫😫 BAE I DO NOT WISH TO BE PARTED FROM YOU NO MORE 😫 IT IS AGONIZING. TIL DEATH DO US APART WE SHALL BE ENAMORED AND INTERTWINED BY OUR SOULS FOR ETERNITY n they ride off into the sunset

[dabilovesme]

Heyyy this is sumn I just wanted to throw at y’all cuz why not🤷🏾‍♀️

Warnings: fluff, suggestive themes

Pairings: Mina x black!fem!reader, Shoto x black!fem!reader, Kirishima x black!fem!reader

A/n: you can read the stuff i post if you aren’t black but just know it ain’t abt you🤞

How they react to your hair matching them hc

Mina

- Mina knew today was the day of your hair appointment and she absolutely despised your hair appointments because she knew it would take AT LEAST 6 hours till you finish and she wants (needs) to be with you all of the time but she knew how important your hair was to you and she absolutely loved the hairstyles you get so she sits n wait in your dorm till you get back

- You we’re basically done now, you just needed to let your hair dresser to use a lighter to make the hair look neater but once you were done, you was so excited to surprise Mina that you were practically speeding to get back to your dorm. Once you got back you went up to your dorm and opened the door

-What Mina saw made her smile from ear to ear. You had long light pink butterfly locs with gold hair jewelry sitting beautifully on them. Mina jumped off your bed and ran to cover your face with kisses

-“Stop that Mina!” You say playfully, trying to cover your face from being attacked by kisses. “I’m sorry baby but you look amazing! I mean you always look amazing duh, but we’re matching!” She says cheerfully while looking at you like the angel you are. “Thank you sweetheart, I’m glad you love it so much!” You say while having a big dopey smile on your face which Mina found so adorable. “You’re welcome baby and I know how much you love movies,food,and me, so I ordered some pepperoni n bacon pizza and have all 7 conjuring movies IN chronological order!” She says pointing at the 2 pizza boxes and laptop sitting on your bed. “ you don’t know how much I love you” you say with all the love in your heart. “ I love you too y/n”

-during the movies she was rubbing your scalp cuz she knows how tender it is after getting your hair done and she was still fan-girling that you got the same hair color as her. She loves you so much

Shoto

-Shoto had dropped you off to your hair appointment, he even gave you the money to get your hair done. He did that like 5 hours ago, you are a lil more than halfway done with your hair and then he facetimes you out of no where and you answer with the camera facing the ceiling.

Shoto: um hello?

Y/n: hey baby, uh why’d you call?

Shoto: I can’t call my beautiful girlfriend now?

Y/n: oh no, you can but my hair isn’t finished!

Shoto: and?

Y/n: …..it’s a surprise….

Shoto: ok beautiful, call me back when you’re finished, I love you.

Y/n: I love you too!

-you hang up the phone and sit patiently for the hair stylist to finish your hair. “All done!” The hair stylist say while touching up your edges. “Thank you!, here’s a tip.” You tip the wonderful lady $50 cuz she even washed and blow dried your hair so a extra tip was deserved…..it was the money Shoto gave you anyways. You call Shoto to pick you up and when he arrives and see you walk out, mans was stunned

- you walk out of the salon with knotless braids and half of your braids were red and the other half was white, you had silver jewelry dangling off of the braids so beautifully. Shoto didn’t even remember to unlock the passenger door to let you in cuz he was so stuck staring at your pretty face and colorful braids. Once you knocked on the window, he snapped out of it and unlocked the doors, “ sorry love, I got distracted” he says while the tips of his ears and his cheeks starts to turn red. “Distracted by what baby?” You say teasingly, knowing damn well what’s distracting him. “ oh um it was your hair….it’s matching mine.” He says while starting the car and his face still burning up. “ do you like it?” You ask while putting on your seat belt. “ i love it, sweetheart.” He says while leaning in towards you. “Im glad you do” you say before leaning into him and lightly pecking his lips, you try to pull back but he rests his index and thumb fingers on your chin just to kiss you a little longer. He kisses your cheek before pulling away and driving off. “I want you to sit on my face when we get back” Shoti says randomly with a calm, monotone expression. “I-uh- ok” you were in for a lonnng night when y’all got back.

Kirishima

-poor baby never knew how long it took for you to get your hair done cuz he only ever saw you installing a wing or fluffing out your afro which didn’t take long since you were used to doing it but once you told him your braids would take at least 7 hours…..manz wanted to cry. “ 7 full hours with you with me?!” He says in a cracking whiny voice. “It’s gonna be ok baby, it’ll be worth it, I promise” you say while kissing his cheek. “But that’s soo long” he says dramatically, you roll your eyes while you grab your phone. “The quicker I get started, the quicker I finish” you say while putting on your jacket. “Ugh fine. I love you!” He says while giving you a quick peck on your lips, “I love you too baby, see you later” and you finally head out

- it has been hours now and kiri has texted you hella messages asking if you were almost done and when you finally respond saying you’re finished, you just knew your baby was smiling from ear to ear. You paid the stylist and headed back to your dorm, once you’re there your door is locked. “Shit I must’ve forgot my keys” you knock on the door and once the door opens, you’re greeted with a speechless boyfriend.

-“ hey baby……you like my hair” your hair was in dark red faux locs with gold jewelry on them which complimented your mesmerizing dark skin so perfectly. “I love it baby! U look so manly” he says jumping like a toddler in a candy shop, “ wait not manly bu-” he says like he’s panicking. “I know what you mean baby haha, and thank you!” you say wrapping your arms around his neck, he snakes his hands around your waist kisses you all so sweetly and then pulls away. “You want me to oil n massage your scalp?, you seem like you’re in pain” he says looking at you with adoration. “Please baby?” You say while your hands are still around his neck. “Of course baby” he says picking you up bridal style and kicking the door closed. He locks the door and lays you down in bed. “Baby where’s your oils n your bonnet?” He asked while looking on your dresser. “ it’s in my top drawer to the right” you say while pointing at the drawer. “Oh okay, I found it, you ready?” He says walking towards you. “Yeppp” you say enthusiastically. “All done!” He says before putting your bonnet on your head for you. “Thank you baby, I love you” you say while cuddling against him, “you’re welcome and I love you too” he says holding you tightly while still lightly rubbing your scalp to sooth the discomfort. A few moments later, y’all were out like a light.

HII I don’t really like how this came out but imma post it anyways

@pervysenpaix @plussizeficchick @misss-chrisss @dejwrites @38riku

[silverflqmes]

໒⦂ 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 𝐓𝐎 ‘𝐈𝐋𝐘’ 𝐇𝐂𝐒.

notes. reposted from wp!

genre. fluff

ft. keishin ukai, suguru daishou, daichi sawamura

gender neutral! reader

➫ 𝓤𝗞𝗔𝗜 𝓚𝗘𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗡 ୨୧ ˎˊ˗

⌗  around this hour keishin probably just got off of work at sakanoshita's, so you offered to help with closing the shop up cuz you wanted him home faster🤲

⌗  tbh he didn't really want you helping him since some tasks were difficult and he had a set routine for how he did things

⌗  he bit his tongue whenever you tried to put things away and always waited at least two minutes for you to move to the next thing to fix it all over again LMAOOOO

⌗  but he really appreciated the help and above all, the company💞

⌗  finally the two of you left and ukai managed to salvage two remaining pork buns that he'd bake a few hours ago for the boys. naturally, he kept one for himself and gave the other to you while you on the walk home.

⌗  he was telling a few stories on the way and making jokes about his days in karasuno as a setter when you suddenly turned to him, eyes shining with endearment and a little bit from the moonlight.

⌗  you had heaved the softest of sighs before leaning onto his shoulder, chuckling almost absentmindedly. "ahh, i love you." — lemme tell you the man was speechless but hella thankful that you didn't peer up from the ground to see his expression.

➫ 𝓓𝗔𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗨 𝓢𝗨𝗚𝗨𝗥𝗨 ୨୧ ˎˊ˗

⌗  MALL DATE CUZ I SAW SUMN CUTE IN HAIKYUU BŪ!! WITH HIM AND MIKA LMAO

⌗  so you'd both be finishing up on your shopping and it's around eight — which is when the mall closes ( dunno if it's like this in japan, but definitely in the states ), and you're both on your way out

⌗  he'd be carrying most of the bags while you're finishing up the rest of the milkshake he got you, and it's when the moonlight struck him that you realized how lucky you were

⌗  he may be the pettiest person on his team and get into dumb banters with nekoma's captain, but he was the love of your life regardless. the one that you love and cared for so dearly, who brought you happiness like no other man or woman could

⌗  he was there every minute, every call, every hangout; every moment, he was there for you no matter how happy or sad you were.

⌗  "suguru?" you'd call out finally and he'd hum, peering over at you with a tired smile. "what is it, my love?"

⌗  "i love you so much, thank you for today," you smiled softly, leaning in to peck his cheek quickly, which left him a flustered mess- oh boy..

➫ 𝓢𝗔𝗪𝗔𝗠𝗨𝗥𝗔 𝓓𝗔𝗜𝗖𝗛𝗜 ୨୧ ˎˊ˗

⌗  it's just about two minutes before he had to line up for his match against shiratorizawa; the air had been tense and you were very much aware of his anxiety

⌗  who wouldn't be anxious? as a third year, it was do or die to get into nationals and as a captain, he couldn't bare being the one to let his team down, not after declaring to them that they would make it to nationals.

⌗  you noticed his nervous demeanor and gently, you approached his tensed form, crouching down in front of him while he sat on the bench as you reached out for his hands

⌗  gently you cradled them both in your own, placing a kiss at the top before looking up at him, catching the blush spreading across his tanned cheeks.

⌗  "you're gonna do great, you know that?" you'd ask, tracing his fingers gently with your own while he nodded slowly.

⌗  his lips had parted to make a remark and you shushed him with a quick kiss, laughing softly when his cheeks darkened profusely.

⌗  "i love you daichi, good luck out there, i'll be cheering you on as loud as i can!" you proclaimed before standing back up and running off to the stands, waving him off enthusiastically while he stood there, utterly flabbergasted. but what you didn't catch was the soft smile that formed on his lips🥺

notes. more reposts lol

↳ return to main masterlist . request rules . send an ask

[spinster-sisters]

laughing too hard at the seonghwa bias ask!! what about headcanons about people who bias each ateez member, just for shits and giggles? (i think what people normally name this is ‘what your bias says about you’ or sumn like that? anywaysss)

Ask and you shall receive.

What your ateez bias says about you. According to me. An irrelevant bitch.

Before we begin i went kinda heavy with this so tread lightly so small trigger warning.

-

Hongjoong: ur into toxic people. Not that my beautiful baby is toxic, no no no. But a lot of your real life relationships probably treat u like shit, so you find his reliability and how strong he loves comforting. Also because of those less than ideal relationships, your better at over looking the things about him that would make others go eek, like the whole work a holic thing and the more than slight possessiveness because they pale in comparison to the shit your used to. In fact? You probably crave the idea of someone wanting you that much.

In a more lighthearted take you are probably one of the most interesting people to talk to. Probably have a million hobbies and great stories to tell. Your life is full of amazing experiences that other will love hearing about.

Seonghwa: abandonment issues. Perhaps have some problems in your home life that make you crave domestic things like fucking heroin because your own home is kinda whack. Seonghwa feels like home. Also you probably have a large personality, the kinda thing where people get tired of it kinda quickly and it leaves you feeling left out and alone. Basically you want a safe space to exist with someone who actually wants to be there with you. (This is a self call out)

Once again to ease the tension. You probably match his caring energy. You are amazing at looking after others and are very aware of the people around you. A people pleaser but in a good way. I dont want to say a natural leader cuz thats not it, but people tend to look to you when the going gets tough.

Yunho: how's your anxiety treating you? No seriously. Like you need his big golden retriever energy simply to get through the day. Yall know how he is just naturally amazing at everything? That is what your find so attractive about him. You want him to take you by the hand and lead you through all the problems in your life cuz he could do it so effortlessly. You need someone to come through and take all your cares away with a smile.

Your energy is unmatched. You are the type of person people just sort of like to be around. Supper soft and nice. Easiest person in the world to talk to its almost unfair. Probably extremely good at 1 or 2 very specific things that leave people in awe.

Yeosang: i promise you the world is not as bad as you think. Probably pretty nihilistic. Like if pessimism was a person, it would be you. Always expect the worst literally no matter what. His honesty is probably super comforting to you. You need someone to sit on your shoulder and remind you whats actually happening. You know how when you feel bad, it only pisses you off more when people say everything will be ok? Yeosang doesn't do that, he tells you the truth and thats what you need to hear. Basically Yeosang is a realist and you desperately need to be reminded that things are not as bad as they seem.

Funniest bitch alive no fucking cap. Perhaps a defense mechanism but we in a happy place now so let's not think about it. Probably supper relaxed and chill vibes. Ur invited to all the 🍃🍃 seshes.

San: you probably aren't used to having a lot. Whether it be a lot of things or a lot of people in your life. Its not like your not likeable or hard working cuz you definitely are, its just for whatever reason it constantly feels like everything you want is just barely out of reach. San is just special you know? Like he could be that one perfect thing in your life thats yours and only yours.

Supper energetic. Like literally. Your running around all excited and shit. Its v cute keep it up. Lil heart breaker too. Everyone wants to be your friend or to be your partner. Are genuinely always smiling even when your not feeling to great.

Mingi: oh baby who hurt you. Trust issues. Someone needs to give you a fucking HUG. Ima say that you just had one person in your life that really fucked you up. Friend or a significant other, it doesn't matter. You need someone like mingi who just had that incredibly pure and can do no wrong energy. Mingi is just so incredibly trustworthy, like absolutely anything you need from him he can provide. Your always on your guard with people and you need someone to just fucking rely on.

First off, has anyone every told you how pretty your smile is? Stunning. Probably likes naps far more than the average person. Also great sense of fashion. Idk yall just always look so correct? Even if its not whats exactly in style your whole look just matches your energy.

Wooyoung: your self esteem is not it. You probably have a large group of friends and you are constantly comparing yourself to them and others. Just take a break babe, your absolutely fine. You kinda look up to him. You want his confidence, his energy, his aura that seems to make everyone like him, you want people to look at you the way they look at him.

You know that song thats like "thats my best friend, she a real bad bitch" thats you. Could not possibly be bothered by shit. Like you handle everything. Even if its not the best solution, you still always have one. Brains always working a mile a minute.

Jongho: you hold yourself to a high standard. You get extremely upset with yourself when you don't succeed. Probably throw yourself full force into absolutely everything you do and its not healthy. Like your relationships may be suffering because you don't let yourself make time for them. He just, seems like the type to not only understand that drive you have, but also be willing to stick it out when the going gets tough.

Just a sweetheart. Probably have some cute ass hobby like baking. Music is your lifestyle. Like the rest of us listen for enjoyment, you listen because you need to. Like always have background noise going on.

[milliumizoomi]

THAT’S YOUR CHILD, NOT MINE.

Pairings: Midoriya x Black Fem! Reader, Bakugou x Black Fem! Reader, Kaminari x Black Fem! Reader

Warnings: Crack, Slight Cursing, VV scared fathers.

A/n: I just thought about this a few days ago and thought it would be so funny so why not💀.

Manz came home so tired

Today was a tough day for him

He just wanted to shower, eat then sleep and cuddle up into you

And that was the plan

Until he walked thru the front door,,,

And heard screaming🚶🏽‍♀️

He stood there like “..wtf😀”

“Babe..!” He called out while taking his shoes off at the door

He heard another shriek and then yelling

He was literally so confused

He walked further into the house and literally when he was ‘bout to round the corner guess what he see??

He sees your kids high key beelining outta the bathroom

all 3 of them, both sons and daughter,,

the oldest being 6 which was your oldest son, then your other son was 4 and then your daughter was 1

they were all just running (and crawling) around the house naked for no god damn reason

And when he walked in the bathroom chileeeee

he found you slumped over the tub looking tired asf

“Izuku Midoriya..” you rasped out

He froze up so quick

“Y—yes my love..!” He answered

You got up and threw the towel

“Go get ya kids before I whoop they ass"

He sighed and dropped his head

“KIDS! YOUR MOTHER SAYS TO BATHE OR ELSE!” He yelled

Now the kids was jus playing but when they heard that..

Chile they couldn’t have moved quicker

Your 6 year old son picked up your daughter and practically skipped his ass to the bathroom with his brother right behind him

Now idk what he thought was gon happen

Cuz him and everybody else know y’all’s kids are demon spawns

With his 6 year old daughter and son mmcht.

And he thought it wouldn’t be a problem to just leave you alone wit them

Without saying a god damn thang

Like fr you turned around to ask this man for sumn and he was gone

You was ready to beat his ass

And at this point ya kids too

Cuz they was running around with they nappy head and crust still in they eyes

And you was sitting here trying to catch they bad asses

It ain’t help either that they was using they quirks to run from you

“Lord Jesus don’t make me commit murder in this house” you said to yourself.

You decided you was gon call their father cuz you wasn’t gon put up wit this

When he answered,, nigga ain’t get one word in before shit started happening again

“Katsuki get yo ass home and take care of your kids before I buss they lil hard ass heads open”

He then heard the screams of the twins in the background playing and laughing

“Damn it fine I’m coming” he said gruffly

He moved so fast cuz he knows you don’t have patience when the kids act like this

Maneee he came home with the speed and swooped them kids up so fast

“You know your mother is crazy why the hell are you two provoking her?!” He said

“We didn’t wanna go to mommy!” Your daughter said

“Nigga bathe them yourselves ‘cause they testin’ my patience” you said as you walked away to the kitchen

Bakugou just shook his head and laughed at you

“You see what you two little bad asses did? You better go tell her your sorry after I’m done” he said gruffly

They jus made up they faces like he be doing as Bakugou took them to the bedroom.

MANEE KAMINARI AINT NO HELP SOMETIMES

Hell he’d be screaming for his own life when you get mad

So basically them kids on they own

Chile you was trying to feed your 4 month and 3 year old sons

And they don’t got a speck of seriousness in them for nothing

Even if they little mannn with Kami personality in them they for sure don’t take shit seriously at all

So that’s how your kitchen table and the wall next you is full of baby food, mashed potatoes and chicken gravy

You was so mad

“DENKI KAMINARI!!” You screamed in frustration.

My man came galloping down hall at the sound of his full name

“BABE?! WHAT’S WRONG?! AM I IN TROUBLE?” he screeched while turning the corner, going into the kitchen

“No but your sons boutta make me rip my hair out..” you told him, leaning back in your chair

“My sons?” He questioned, walking into the room

“Yes your sons. They acting like you right now so no these ain’t my kids,, they yours” you say looking up at him

You turn to see both of them bobbing their little heads of blonde hair and giggling

“Babe please feed them.. cuz if they slap these spoons outta my hand one more time—“

“Ok ok calm down I’ll feed them! Go wash off” he cuts you off and says before you can say anything else

You nod and get up and kiss him then walk away

Kaminari turns and looks at the boys

“You like making life difficult for mommy don’t you?” He says while laughing

The boys giggled

He laughed with them then sat down at the table

“Don’t worry I do too!” He laughed

“I HEARD THAT!” you called out

“SORRY MAAM!” Denki cried, not wanting to get in trouble with you

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