#damiano david x oc

[writingmaneskin]

Home is Where The Heart is - A Damiano David Story || Chapter Thirty Two || END

Description: Learning how to love again, how to heal and that it’s okay to move on and rebuild yourself after dealing with so much pain.

Words: 2k

A/N: I am crying as I write this (😭). Thank you for believing in this story that started out as a daydream on a walk and that ended up changing my life. Thank you for believing in me and supporting me. Thank you for loving the characters I created and for sticking with me and with them. Thank you.

PS. There is a time-jump between the previous chapter and this one.

THE HIWTHI MASTERLIST

THE MAIN MASTERLIST

kofi || taglist || come chat

The David household was full of music. Beautiful, lively music. He couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he worked on the dinner menu that he was preparing for the little gathering. Eli was on a call in the space the two of them had adapted as an office, Dante alternating between dancing along with the music and helping his papa (read: causing chaos) in the kitchen. 

His soul felt lighter. It was like seeing light at the end of the tunnel - a very long tunnel that had really put his mental health through things that he never thought he’d experience. But as each day passed, he felt lighter, he felt closer and closer to being able to enjoy life again, the fears that had chased him awake for so many nights, slowly fading into shadows. 

Lost in thought, he got startled when Eli wrapped their arms around his middle and pressed a kiss to his shoulder.

“I am all yours now, how can I help?” Eli spoke quietly.

He leaned back and pressed a kiss to their temple. 

“Just keep me company, I’ve got this.” He reassured them, Eli sitting down immediately on one of the chairs next to the kitchen island.

“Is everyone truly coming?” Eli asked, trying to do the math of how many people would show up. 

“Yes, they promised.” 

“How will we fit fifteen people here?” Eli asked.

“It will be cosy, don’t worry.” Damiano winked at them, earning a faint blush from them.

“How much exactly did I miss while I was working?” Eli raised their brow.

“Not much, but it will be a nice surprise, I guess.” Damiano chuckled and went to give them a kiss. 

The doorbell rang and interrupted their moment. 

“Who is it this early?” Eli looked at the clock, realising that there was still more than an hour until the official gathering time.

“I got it, don’t worry.” Damiano rushed to open the door and greeted Thomas and Tom who were carrying a big box together.

“Listen, the only reason we agreed to this free labour is because you promised pasta.” Thomas said as a way of greeting.

“I am holding up my end of the bargain, don’t worry.” Damiano laughed.

“If you don’t, I am leaving him here until you make him the pasta you promised.” Tom promised. 

“You can’t leave me behind!” Thomas protested.

“Fine, we’ll both stay here and make their lives miserable until we are fed pasta.” Tom grinned. 

“Ethan is behind us with your brother, bringing the chairs.” Tom announced.

“This is going to be so much fun, I need to go cook!” Damiano clapped his hands and rushed back to the kitchen, seeing that Eli stepped up to stir the sauce.

“Ciao, we bring more things.” Ethan shouted from the door. 

“I think Vic said she is bringing booze.” Thomas mentioned as he and Tom started unpacking the table and setting it right with Tom and Ethan.

“He invited all of us and we still have to pull our weight around here, can you imagine!” Damiano heard his brother joke from the other room. 

“Go and see your brother, I know you miss him. I got this.” Damiano kissed Eli, who looked a bit sad to be asked out of the kitchen yet happy to be able to steal some time with Tom.

**

Eli did as they were bid, even though they wanted to help around with the preparations. They had seen Damiano be excited about this event, he hadn’t shared much about the reason for gathering all of them and Eli had decided not to push, knowing that he would come around when he was ready.

“Hi.” Tom pulled them in a bone crushing hug and spun them around.

“Hi.” Eli held him tightly. 

“I think it’s time for a smoke break for me.” Tom announced, looking if anyone would dare to challenge his words but they only laughed, Ethan taking over what Tom had been doing around the table.

“Are you okay?” Eli held their brother’s hand tightly as the two went to the balcony.

“More than okay.” Tom reassured them.

“I miss you.” Eli admitted.

“I miss you too but you said it yourself - things change.” Tom hugged them again after lighting a cigarette.

“I can’t believe that all my favourite people live within the same city limits yet I can’t spend as much time as I’d like with them.” Eli admitted quietly, voicing the words that had been haunting them for a little while.

“Your work requires you to, though. I know the feeling, I know the pain. Don’t think that I like that I don’t see you as often.” Tom rested his head on their shoulder and kept holding them.

“Which is why I sometimes hate my job.” Eli grumbled.

“A light goes out in your eyes when you are not being creative. Maybe in time we will find a way where you can spend more time with us without sacrificing that light to get to it.” 

“I feel like I miss so much.” 

“I know, but seeing your joy and pride in your creative accomplishments is unmatched.” 

“They won’t keep my son happy when he grows up. They won’t be here for him as he develops into a human.” Eli argued.

“Eli, you were gone for two weeks, and you still have a little bit more work to do before settling here for a longer period of time. Did you offer Damiano and Dante join you?” 

“No, because even if they did, I’d still barely see them.” 

“Offer it, it will give you a bit of peace of mind.”

“I’ll consider it.”

“If you don’t, I’ll ship them off to you.” 

Eli chuckled and held onto their brother.

“Your family loves you and we are patiently and excitedly waiting for you.” Tom reassured them.

“I love all of you more than anything.” It was all Eli managed to say.

**

“Now, the party has arrived.” Vic announced as soon as Thomas opened the door for her. She was carrying two bags with various drinks and was trailed by Auri and Angie who brought various snacks and soft drinks with them.

“Good, you can help with setting up the chairs and organising everything.” Thomas suggested helpfully.

“I will help with other things, thank you very much.” Victoria grinned and walked straight to the kitchen where Damiano was still cooking.

“Ciao! The party has arrived.” Vic put the bags on the kitchen island and went to hug Damiano. He chuckled and held her for a moment.

“I am glad you came.” 

“It’s not like I was given much choice.” Vic teased.

“It’s a big evening.” Damiano said ominously.

“I am not wearing waterproof makeup, don’t even think of proposing to Eli.” 

“I am not proposing.” Damiano insisted and went back to cooking.

“Is everything good between you two?” Vic asked quietly. Damiano looked at his friend surprised.

“Of course it’s good. I love Eli dearly, we are just not at the proposal yet. And even if we were, I would not put them on the spot like that. Tonight is about something else entirely. Don’t be so nosy, you’ll find out in a bit.” 

Vic grinned. 

“You’ve grown up so much lately.” She observed.

Damiano didn’t react to her words, just started taking out the plates from the shelf and started piling them on.

“And not only have you grown but you are settling in yourself, you are much calmer now than you were before. Much calmer than when everything began.” Vic kept going on.

“Thank you.” He responded after a moment.

“You’re welcome.” She kissed his cheek before going to see Dante.

**

It took him a bit longer than he would have liked to finish preparing the food but while he did, his friends set up the table and chairs and eventually, they came around to get table covers, glasses, and they all set the table and then both sets of parents arrived and he started serving the food. 

Eli put Dante in the high chair, placing him next to Vic per his own demand which everyone found adorable. 

Damiano was bursting with joy and was struggling to hide it.

“What’s going on?” Different people tried to inquire but he brushed them off, waiting for everyone to be sitting around the table so he could say the words that have been begging to be let out for a while now. Perhaps longer than he realised.

“Get around the table and you’ll find out.” Damiano only replied, patiently waiting for all fourteen of them to get around the table and sit down. 

“Are any of my children getting proposed to tonight?” Eli and Tom’s mom asked.

Damiano looked at her and shook his head smiling, Thomas following suit.

“Okay, what is going on?” Eli looked from their place next to Damiano once everyone was settled. He stood up and took his glass, raising it in the air.

“Thank you all for coming here.” He started, nerves catching up to him a little bit. 

“You called.” Ethan smiled at him.

Damiano returned the smile.

“The recent years have been very hectic and especially the last few were not only hectic but also busy and chaotic and full of the whole spectrum of emotions. Life showed me all its colours and did not wait for my decision to dive into it. That is not to say that I am complaining about any of it, because I am not.” 

There were smiles all around, and he spotted tears in his mother’s eyes.

“I might not be the smoothest person when it comes to expressing how I feel but I am working on it. I lost too long not being with the person I love.” He smiled at Eli.

“I wasted too long chasing perfectionism and not recognizing that what I have is more than perfect on its own.” 

Eli reached to hold his hand and Damiano leaned down to kiss their hand. 

“I gathered you all here because I wanted to celebrate all of you. To celebrate my love for you. To celebrate life. I sat in darkness for a long time not realising that there is more to life. You helped me chase my dreams, you helped me when I was broken, you sat by my side while I learned how to be a man and a father. You loved me, you took care of me. You opened your hearts for Dante and made sure that we both felt loved and cherished. You gave us family. I am grateful for that, I am grateful for you.” There was a smile on his face that no one had seen in a while - sincere, carefree, joyful smile.

“We love you, Dami. Of course we support you and of course we will be there for you as long as you need us.” His mom spoke up.

“I’d like to start with forever. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without all of you. I love you and I see you. I see your joys, I see your struggles, I am here for you just as you are for me. You are the most important people in my life and I will not stop saying thank you for everything you’ve done for me, for us.” 

There were tears and smiles on his favourite people’s faces. There were tears on his own face. He went around and gave them all hugs and whispered his thanks again and again.

When he got back to Eli and he kissed them gently, taking his sweet time, Tom interrupted them with the words.

“Time for a picture. We need to capture this moment.” He insisted.

Thomas chuckled and went with his boyfriend to set up the camera to take pictures. 

They all gathered, Dante in Damiano’s arms, Eli leaning their head on Damiano’s shoulder. Ethan with his arms wrapped around Aurora. Thomas and Tom together, holding hands, Vic pressing a kiss to Angie’s cheek and Damiano’s brother and Leo standing between both sets of teary-eyed parents. 

**

Hours later, Damiano shared one of the pictures that Tom had taken. He put a heart emoji over Dante’s face to protect his privacy but he wanted the moment on his feed. He wanted to scream it from the top of the world. These are the people that kept him sane, these are the people that he loved most in the world. 

He captioned it, home is where the heart is. 

--

taglist: @iosonoarina @myissuesworld @moonlight-simp @maneskings, @elvirabelle @queendorkula @hiraetheral , @ilwiwbysmv @vita-thrasher @katyldamusic @ethaneskin @oro-e-diamanti, @theimpossiblehologramtree @8iunie @ventvnni @dpaccione @cuzimitaliano @daddydamiano @shehaddreamstoo @iamtashaquinn @alexxavicry @tnu-ree @soficide @bigsimpsimp @ccweasley @aprilgloomisheretostay

[ykaaaras]

The Preacher Masterlist

Pairing: DAMIANO DAVID x 2 fictional females insert

Story summary: Damiano exorcises a demon from Medusa, helps her to recover, and chooses to protect her from what she sees. However, he can’t protect her from one thing…

Story content and warnings: angst, priest Damiano David, dom Damiano David, original characters, hurt/comfort, supernatural, mystery, mention of religion, fluff, daddy kink, smut, mention of suicide, murder, death and possession, demon character, polyamory relationship

Word count: 15.2k (so far)

A/N: This story doesn’t intend to disrespect any beliefs or to preach, it’s all pure fiction for you to enjoy. Be nice.

Chapters:

Chapter 1 // Back To The End

Chapter 2 // Bury With Smile

[maneskin-dimensione]

Insecurities of the body don’t bode well for the mind.

Pairing: Damiano David x Arna (Named OC - but I write in second person so the name only appears a handful of times, I think? Sorry, It’s just easier for me to write like that.)

Word count: 3.877 words.

Warnings: Bulimia is mentioned and body confidence issues are a main factor in this (this is me just projecting tbh) and any Italian used is down to google translate so I apologise if it’s incorrect; I am learning but it’s going slowly.

I think that’s everything but if I have missed something, please let me know so I can update this and correct myself!

Author’s note: so Hi, I’m new around here and this is my first ever Måneskin fic that I’ve written and actually had the guts to post and that’s just because I’m actually really proud of it. I wanted to give a big thank you to @daddydamiano , who read the full thing before anybody else and was so encouraging, and to @mywritingonlyfans who I sent little tidbits to and gave constant support and encouragement to post it - it means a lot. (I hope it’s okay that I tagged you both!)

So....if you do read this, I hope you enjoy it; comments, likes and reblogs feed both my soul and my enthusiasm to write so please consider it, and I’m always down for criticism too, so if you have any of that after you’ve read it then by all means let me know.

--------------

You'd never been very body confident.

You were able to lie though. Throw on a bright fake smile and act like you were completely comfortable, but you never were....you were just good at pretending.

Aged only 10, your dislike for your body had taken quite a serious physical turn and doctors had become involved, diagnosing you with bulimia.

It had been the entire reason you'd exiled yourself to living in Iceland for three years under the pretense of wanting to know your ancestral homeland more. Living  between Husavik and Reykjavik had been good for you and after returning to Italy, you'd gotten a doctor who had been there and a therapist who you felt comfortable with. You'd been doing well - well enough that your family had trusted you in moving to New York, and later Paris, to study and persue your dream; the only caveat had been that you establish a therapist in these cities and have regular meetings with them, as well as with your main therapist back in Verona, which you still did to this day. There was something incredibly comforting about you having this small network of people around the world, who had your back.

But now onto today.

You were (once again) over at Maneskin house. It was a weekend and (for once) you were ahead on your studies so you were able to hang out with the guys and not feel guilty that you weren't working yourself to the bone as usual. But it hadn't been without it's stresses though - you'd had a migraine for the majority of the week and you were just hoping you could relax, take it easy and enjoy hanging out with your friends for the day.

Because the weather was nice - the nicest it had been in a few days - Thomas had been the one to suggest having a pool party. The music was blearing, there was a buffet table laden with food and the drinks were flowing.

Sitting at the edge of the pool with your feet in the water, you were so fixated watching Thomas and Ethan do handstands under the water that you almost jumped out of your skin when Damiano came and sat beside you, a bottle of suncream in his hands and stifling a laugh.

"You're so cute." he chuckled, opening the lid and squirting some cream onto his palms. "We need to protect your skin, Dolcezza. Don't want you getting burnt now, do we?"

You rolled your eyes but held out your arms for him to liberally cover your skin, and you tried not to blush as he grinned at you. You and Damiano had only been dating for around 2 months and while it was still new, you were really liking the direction it was going; you pair were, as Vic said,  in the "Honeymoon phase" and Damiano had already made a point of promising you that he wouldn't let it end any time soon.

"Turn around, amore." he mumured in your ear, his teeth lightly scraping your lobe. "I need to get everywhere."

You did so and were rewarded with another blinding smile from your boyfriend. As he gently covered your face in suncream, begining to talk about some item of clothing he'd seen online, your eyes wandered and you caught sight of Victoria saunting out of the house, clad in her sunglasses, bikini bottoms and holding another suncream bottle in her hands.

"Ethan!" she called, "Can you....?"

Ethan turned to splash Thomas one more time, before jumping out of the pool to assist her.

You watched them, unable to turn away as Damiano covered your exposed shoulder and your neck with cream, so concentrated in his task that he didn't realise you weren't listening to him or even looking at him.

As you watched Victoria throw her head back and laugh at something Thomas called out, you felt a stab of envy. Not at Victoria, per se, but at her confidence, her belief in herself, her level of comfort around all of the boys.

Her love of her body. Her security. Her "freedom" in a sense.

You wanted that, more than you could ever put into words. You dreamed of the day when looking in the mirror didn't make you recoil in disgust.

But you couldn't have that. You never would. No matter what you did....you'd never be that.

"You've been doing so well," a taunting voice filled your head, a voice you thought you'd forgotten. "But you can never really forget can you? Look at her and then look at you. Why would anyone look at you and think you look good?"

Feeling the sudden hot sting of tears, you pulled your legs out of the water and stood up, startling Damiano, who had, by now, placed the bottle down and was about to pull you in the pool with him, kicking water in Thomas's direction.

"Amore? What's the matter?"

"I uh..." you couldn't meet his eyes, or Victoria's, whose head turned in the direction of the commotion. You suddenly felt a hot bolt of shame fill your body. How could you be envious of your friend, a friend who has been nothing but good to you since the minute you met?

A friend who was approaching you right then, concern written all over her face, her hand stretched out to grasp your wrist.

"Arna?"

"I'm uh..." you hated the way your voice shook. "I'm not really feeling so good. I'm going to go lie down."

"Are you sure?" Vic said, and you tried to ignore the fact that both Ethan and Thomas had approached you now, both wearing identical looks of concern, but you pulled your gaze away, your eyes fixed firmly on the door leading inside.

"Can we bring you anything?" Ethan asked, living up to his name as the mother hen of the group. "Water? Or I'm sure I've got some anti-sickness medication around here somewhere, if you'd like that?"

"No, I think I just need to lie down for a while." you mustered a weak smile.

Damiano had joined you now, curling a hand around your hip. "Dolcezza-"

"I'll be fine." you kept the smile on your face. "I'm sure I'll feel better after a lie down."

"Okay, well," Damiano looked a little bit lost and as much as you wanted to turn around and comfort him, everything just felt overwhelming at that moment. "Just let us know if you need anything."

You just needed to be alone.

.....

You waited until you were safely locked in the room that you'd snagged as your own to take a deep breath.

From the open windows, you could hear mumurings from the garden, the four of them probably asking amongst themselves if you were okay.

No, you weren't. But how could you tell them that without sounding ridiculous? How do you tell your friends that you're jealous of Vic's confidence and love for her body and that you knew you'd never achieve that yourself?

In the back of your mind, you knew it wasn't entirely your fault. You knew this was your history with Bulimia affecting your thought process, affecting your emotions and you hated it because you'd been doing so well, up till now.

But what you knew was your fault was that you hadn't told Damiano, or Vic, or Ethan and Thomas for that matter. The four of them - especially Damiano - were all in the dark about your issues with bulimia and your body.

At the begining of this whole thing, it made sense - in some part to you - to keep it to yourself; you hadn't been in the best place when you'd accepted the job of styling the band and making custom clothes for them and you'd never imagined that you'd become as close to them as you had.

Hell, you never imagined you'd get three best friends and a boyfriend out of it, but now here you were: hiding from said three best friends and boyfriend because your mind was too busy sabotaging you and all the good progress you'd been making so far.

"Arna, can I come in?"

A knock at the door pulled you out of your stupor; you could recognise that voice anywhere.

Did you really want to talk to Vic right now? You weren't mad at her, of course you weren't. It wasn't her fault you were feeling this way but you didn't think talking to her would help you right now. But then maybe talking to Vic was the way forward? You didn't feel you could accurately explain your feelings to Damiano or Ethan and Thomas for that matter, but maybe Vic being a girl....maybe she'd get it?

Maybe she wouldn't be mad at you if you explained?

Swallowing and trying to conceal the shake in your voice, you called out to her.

"Come in!"

The door opened and Victoria immediately shut it behind her. She turned to smile at you, her eyes etched with concern as she approached where you were sitting on the bed, two bottles of beer in her hand. You couldn't help but notice Vic had covered up, wearing one of Ethan's discarded t-shirts and you couldn't help but wonder if, on some level, Vic already knew?

Wordlessly, she handed you a bottle, not daring to speak until you both took a healthy drag, and shuffled onto the bed beside you.

"What's going on, Arna?"

"I..." you shook your head, not daring to meet her eyes. "It's stupid. It's stupid and I don't want you to laugh at me...or get mad and upset with me."

"I could never do that," she mumured, reaching out to rest a hand on your forearm and squeezing.  "You're my friend and I'm concerned about you; we all are. Damiano especially. I had to threaten him with hiding his chokers to be the one to come in here."

You couldn't help but crack a tiny smile at that and Vic grinned back, happy to see you smile.

"Please just talk to me?" she pressed, gently. "I'm worried about you and I want to help, if i can."

"I..." you swallowed. "I don't really know how to start."

"From wherever you want." she mumured, taking another sip of her beer.

"There's no rush."

"Okay," you breathed out slowly and took another sip of beer.

You could do this. You could do this, right?

"I hate my body," you admitted. You felt the weight on your shoulders lift the tinest bit; Victoria was the first person, outside of your immediate family and medical professionals, who you'd fully admitted this to and it felt....freeing?

"Sweetie," Victoria nodded, giving your arm an encouraging squeeze.

But you shook your head, "I had bulimia when I was younger. I was diagnosed when I was around 10. Doctors said it was one of the earliest cases they'd encountered."

"Oh sweetie." Vic mumured, eyes suddenly wet with unshead tears. "I had no idea, I'm so sorry."

But as Vic thought about it, it made a lot of sense. You never wore a bikini during pool days; you always had your stomach covered and your dresses never got shorter than just above your knee. But you'd never shown any other inklings around them. You were always up for going out for meals - you always ate generously and even had dessert...you never seemed worried and yet...and yet here it was.

"Does Damiano know?"

You shook your head. "I haven't told him yet. I didn't really know how to. But I...I want to."

"That's a positive step." Vic smiled, "I can even be there with you, if you'd like."

"Maybe."

The pair of you were silent for a moment, taking sips of your beer before Vic hastened to speak again.

"So, what happened this afternoon?" she asked, "You seemed fine one moment and then the next...the next you ran in here like a bat out of water."

"I...I just got into my own head again." You sighed, "I was...jealous of you."

Vic raised an eyebrow. "Of me? Why?"

"Not of you, per se." you hurried to explain, fear rising in your stomach at the prospect you'd offended her. "I was jealous of your confidence, you know? Your belief in yourself, your level of comfort around all of the boys. God, Vic, I can't even wear a bikini to the pool because I hate my body that much."

You shrugged, blinking rapidly. "I haven't even been shirtless in front of Damiano yet."

"And that's okay, Arna." Vic said, placing her bottle down and taking both of your hands in hers. "There's no rush for something like this. Trust me, it took me years to be confident and secure enough in my body to walk around topless, and let's be honest, Ethan, Thomas and Damiano are the only men I would dare feel comfortable enough to do that around because I know they don't' sexualize me like that."

You nodded, "I get that."

"So, you don't need to worry." Vic continued, "And I know that's easy for me to say, but I mean it. You're gorgeous, Arna. Your body is gorgeous because it's yours and I'm not just saying that because I'm your friend, I'm saying it because it's true and I have a policy of never lying to someone I care about, and if Ethan and Thomas were here, they'd agree with me too."

You stayed silent.

"Hey," she mumured, tilting your head to make you look at her. "You know you're safe with us here, right? There's no judgement here. One day you'll feel comfortable enough to be topless around us all, and maybe that day is soon and maybe it's far away, who knows? The point is, you'll get there and we'll help you, all of us. There's no pressure, from any of us; Damiano especially. Besides, we're a team, remember?"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," you mumured, "You or anyone. Damiano especially."

"They'll understand. I understand." she replied, giving your hands another squeeze. "It's a hard thing to talk about, I get it. But now I know, and soon Damiano will know and we'll all be able to help you."

You sniffed. letting go of one of Vic's hands to wipe away a tear that escaped your eye. Vic made to speak but another knock on the door stopped her.

"Amore? Vic? Can I come in?"

The two of you looked at each other: Victoria concerned and you alarmed.

"Just remember," Vic said, "You don't have to tell him anything yet that you're not comfortable with. But also remember, he's your boyfriend and he cares about you."

"But what if it..." you shrugged, "Scares him off?"

"Trust me, it won't." Vic stood up for the bed. "He cares about you too much to just run away, I promise."

Another knock.

"Vic? Arna?"

"One second!" Victoria called back, rolling her eyes before leaning down and pressing a kiss to your cheek. "It'll all be okay, I promise."

You stayed, rooted on the bed, as Vic stood up, collected her beer bottle and made to open the door, Damiano standing anxiously on the other side of it.

"Hey," Vic gave him a smile, before turning back to you. "Arna, do you want me to stay?"

You considered it, you really did but then you squared your shoulders. You knew, deep down, it was something you needed to do by yourself.

"No, I uh..." you swallowed, giving her a quick smile. "I'm okay."

Vic nodded, returning the smile, before turning back to her perplexed bandmate.

“I'll let you two talk."

Giving one more reassuring smile, Vic left the room and shut the door behind her, leaving you alone with Damiano.

....

You didn't know how long the pair of you stood in silence, until Damiano finally broke it.

"What's going on, bella?"

You didn't know whether Damiano could just really read you well or if he could just see you were trembling from where he stood, but he approached you, hand outstretched as if to take yours but giving you the chance to pull back if it wasn't what you wanted.

Your heart all but melted at his consideration and you slipped your hand into his, a relieved sigh leaving him.

"I..." you swallowed, "I have to tell you something and I'm sorry I've kept it from you for so long, but I just didn't know how to tell you."

A shadow of concern crossed his face.

"Okay," he nodded encouragingly, "Just...whatever it is, I promise it'll be okay. I mean, I'm not going to be mad or anything, I'm just worried about you."

You took another swig of beer before placing the bottle down and squaring your shoulders. "I had bulimia when I was younger and it's heavily contributed to my dislike of my body."

"Arna-"

"I was jealous of Vic's confidence and her belief and love for her own body." you continued, now unable to stop the words pouring out of you. "I just...I can't do the things she can. I can't walk around topless, I can't wear a bikini. Merda, I can't even be shirtless in front of just you!"

"Arna, Arna, Arna." he said your name like a chant. "Please just listen to me. There's no timeframe on that kind of thing, okay? Please don't ever compare yourself to Victoria or anyone else because you don't need to. You are your own person and your body is your own. Just because Vic is confident now doesn't mean she's always been that way and just because you're not confident now, it doesn't mean you never will be."

You nodded. You knew, deep down, that what he was saying was true.

Silently, Damiano sat down on the bed and tugged you to stand between his legs, his face tilted to look up at you.

"About your bulimia..." he began. "Is it...am I okay to ask you questions?"

You nodded, inwardly steeling yourself. You didn't really talk about it much; only to  licensed  professionals.

Talking to Vic about it, and now Damiano, was the most you'd ever shared since your diagnosis when all you ever had were questions, and now it was your turn to provide the answers.

He was silent for a moment and then, "How old were you?"

"10."

"Amore," he breathed out, ducking his head for a moment. You heard him sniff and when he looked back up at you, his eyes were red with unshed tears. "I'm so sorry."

You shrugged. "I've been doing well for a while now. Just today was....today's one of the bad ones."

"Dolcezza, I..." he swallowed, giving your hands a squeeze. "I don't know much about Bulimia and recovery, but it sounds like it's a process; I'm willing to learn and to do my research okay? Just..." he squeezed your hands again. "Thank you for telling me."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier."

"That doesn't matter." You could see by his eyes that he meant it. "You're telling me now."

The pair of you were silent for a moment, both of you trying to organise your racing minds.

"I just..." you swallowed, "It's so hard sometimes, Damia. There's so much I don't like."

"Like what?"

"My stomach isn't completely flat," you mumured, despondently. "And my thighs are a little bigger than I want. I just don't look like a rockstar's girlfriend."

Damiano shrugged, but it wasn't a careless shrug. It was more like a who-cares-what-people-think shrug.

"I mean, I don't have a six pack now, do I?" he raised an eyebrow at you. "Tell me honestly. Would you like me better if I did?"

Your eyes widened at the insinuation; outrage coiling in your stomach. How could he even think that? Ask that you were only with him for his looks, ask if would much prefer him if he had a six pack and bulging muscles?

How could he think you were only with him for his looks when there was so much more to him? So much magic to him.

If only you could see that he believed you had magic inside you too. Because you were magic to him, the very definition of the word. In fact, he was convinced that if you looked up the word in the dictionary, there would be a photo of you beside the description.

"Exactly," Damiano replied, and it took you a moment to realise that you'd verbalized your thoughts about him and your never-ending blush deepened. "You like me just the way I am - you want me just the way I am - and Arna, I fell for you as you are. Exactly like this, every single piece of you. Your beautiful mind and heart and the way you see the world. The fact that you're outwardly stunning is just a bonus. I know you don't see it, but you're gorgeous, Arna. You're the most gorgeous human, inside and out. I love your body, because it's yours and one day I hope you'll be able to look in the mirror and be happy and proud of what you see reflecting back at you. Because you should be, because there's absolutely nobody else like you on this planet and I'm all too aware of lucky I am to be the guy by your side."

You sniffed. You really didn't want to cry, but his words, the look on his face, the softeness of his tone, the way he looked at you....you couldn't help it.

"Damia-"

"I know that my words aren't going to change everything." he continued on, his eyes wild in his determination to get his words out. "I know it's not fixable overnight, but I promise to spend every single day making sure you know how stunningly gorgeous you are, through my words, actions, whatever. I'm going to make sure you know it and you feel it, because you are."

You could hear his words, you really could. But as much as you wanted to take them in and embrace them, you were stuck on four particular words.

I fell for you.

"You..." you swallowed, "You fell for me?"

Damiano raised an eyebrow, a smile tugging at his lips. "That's your takeaway from all this, amore?"

"No, I've listened to everything you've said, honestly," you assured him, "But....for right now, that's all my brain can focus on."

He chuckled, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close, hands linking against your back.

"I have fallen for you, dolcezza." he mumured, brushing his nose against yours. "I fell for you the minute we met, and honestly, it's probably my worst kept secret and I know it's sudden and we've only been dating officially for 2 months but...." he shrugged. "I've been in love with you for a year; I've been in love with the most beautiful woman in the world for a year and I will keep reminding you of that until you believe me."

You leaned forward against him, tugging your face into the crook of his neck as him arms fully enveloped you.

"Thank you."

A kiss found it's way to the top of your head. "Sempre."

"Damiano?"

"Yes?"

"I've fallen for you too."

                                                     ---------

Dolcezza: Sweetness

Bella: beautiful

Sempre: always

Amore: love

[sodascherrycola]

Anniversary & Surprise Announcements

358,286 likes

sophiadavid I can’t believe it’s already been a year since I married the love of my life! You have made my life a dream come true since then and I couldn’t thank you enough! I love you so much Damiano and to many more years to come!

8/21/19 <3

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ykarr 😘

sophiakarras_updates It’s been a year alr?!!??

thomasraggi__ Happy Anniversary!!!

damianoshoes I still can’t get over the dress, like my dream wedding dress for sure!! Congrats cuties!

arianagrande Ahhhh!!!!! Love you babe!!!!!

sophiadavid Love ya !

290,691 likes

ykarr Felice uno anno mio amore. Ogni giorno con tu essere come un fata storia mio innamorato io voler fare a dare tu la  il mondo e il stella se ti permettere mi. Noi essere questo lontano e io sapere noi determinazione andare ancora lontano. Ringraziare ti per detto sì a mi quello Giovedì. translation: Happy 1 year my love. Every day with you is like a fairy tale my sweetheart. I want to give you the world and the stars if you'd let me. We've been this far and I know we will go even farther. Thank you for saying yes to me that Thursday.

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sophiadavid Awhh stop it, ur making me blushhh 😖

damiiii---ano I can’t he’s literally so fucking romantic! I want one!!

conangray And why can’t I have this 🙄

corinnakarras I had to google translate this, but let me tell you it was totally worth it omg 🥺😭

1,736,473 likes

sophiadavid Suprise?

View all 3,603 comments

damianofan11 OMG STOP IT I’M NOT READY!!!!!!!

fangirl002 HOLY SHIT SHE’S PREGNANT!!!!!! WTF!

ykarr Ti amo piccola ragazza (I love you babygirl)

michaelkarras Dude what? No way!

sophiadavid Yes way!! Ahhhhh!

maneskinfan82 Imagine Dami being a dad 😩😩😩

4,271,981 likes

sophiadavid Not Dami hiding from parenthood, damn.

View all 33,732 comments

vicdeangelis Sounds like something he’d do lmfao

sophiadavid ikr now I gotta be a single mom smh 😤

vicdeangelis Congrats btw Soph :)

ethaneskin If this baby isn’t named after me 😑

sophiadavid only if Damiano lets me 🤷🏻‍♀️

ykarr Obviously 🙄

[jahaerra]

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐚, 𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐨 𝐃𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐝

summary: Four years after fleeing from her father in Italy, Coraline meets her ex-boyfriend Damiano David again in Rotterdam. The two immediately reconnect and it doesn't take long for Coraline to realize that she never stopped loving Damiano.

Pairing: Damiano David x female oc

warnings: none

this is actually just an excerpt from my damiano fanfic on wattpad, which is already finished, my username on there is reflectingsouls and the story is called ‘Coraline’

There was a piece of paper on the pillow, creases in the paper as if it had been folded over and over again.

There were only a few lines on it, like a short poem, and I recognised my own neat handwriting.

❝ Our Story ends here and it has been fulfilling.

I'll miss you, terribly I leave you - lovingly.

Until the next life. ❞

I had left this note at his house before I had left Italy four years ago.

He had kept it and carried it with him all this time. A single tear rolled down my cheek.

Damiano opened the balcony door when he came out of the shower. The sound of the rain was louder, but the roofing of the balcony ensured that it did not rain into the room.

It was dark outside, no stars could be seen in the sky because it was so cloudy and even the moonlight seemed to be drowning under the impending thunderstorm.

I had put the note back on the pillow. My eyes wandered over Damiano. Once again he was wearing only sweatpants and no shirt. Il Ballo della vita. The dance of life.

I traced the contours of his muscles with my eyes and followed his every move. It was dark in the room too, we hadn't switched on the light, but I could see him clearly.

He folded a shirt and put it in his wardrobe, then turned to me and came towards the bed.

"Comfy?" he asked, the corners of his mouth twitching as he saw me lying there, wrapped in his blanket and with my head on his pillow. It smelled like him and that left a pleasant feeling inside me.

"Yes" I replied against the pillow and heard a soft laugh from Damiano. He settled down next to me on the bed, then his eyes fell on the note. He reached for it and let it disappear in his fist.

"Too late, I've already seen it," I said, smiling slightly at him, "I didn't think you'd keep it that long."

"The note was the last thing you gave me," he replied as if that was a justification for keeping it for four years.

"The last sentence always seemed to me like a promise that all was not lost. That there would be another chance for us if we met again under different circumstances," he added.

My chest ached when he said that. His voice was soft and rough, more so than usual.

"And now we are here, but we are plagued by the same worries as before," I murmured. Damiano frowned, "You think so?" "Yes, my father followed us here, he won't leave me alone."

"But now you are no longer bound to him. Neither is Sophia. You can stand up to him instead of fleeing, I can help you." "I don't know if I really can," I sighed with honest concern.

The rain continued to beat against the windows.

"You can, I believe in you," Damiano assured me. "I've waited for you to come back home," he whispered.

So, Marlena, come back home, I feel it's getting cold in here So, Marlena, come back home, I don't want to wait anymore

"I've wondered how often the world reminded you of me, because it wouldn't let me forget you," he added, and the words made my throat dry. "I'm no less broken than I used to be," I said in a raspy voice.

"I don't mind that"

"You say that now, but once I'm committed to you, you'll have the weight on your shoulders that I carry with me every day. You will regret loving me," I was convinced of what I was saying.

"Never say such a thing. I could never regret having loved you. We belong together, Coraline.", he rose from the bed, his voice sounding a little angry.

I, too, straightened up "Damiano, listen to me-", I begged him. His silhouette was dark as a flash of lightning twitched across the sky, followed by thunder.

I flinched because the loud sound startled me and it was like a reminder of all the broken pieces that made up my soul.

"I've already told you that, back in Italy, but I'm grateful we shared this time together. Maybe we found our forever at the wrong time, and someday, we can be back together again, but not while I'm still broken. I want to be good for you, I want to enrich your life and make you happy, and not be responsible for you worrying and suffering. I want to be the calm sea on a sunny day, but today I am the deadly waves during a storm."

Damiano listened to me without interrupting. His brown eyes watched me keenly as I spoke, while my voice grew louder and fiercer until I was almost shouting because I was so angry and desperate myself that I kept getting in my own way.

After I had spoken the words, there was a silence between us. I walked towards Damiano, who was standing in front of the open balcony door, the moon shining through the ripped cloud cover and illuminating his chest, making him look paler than usual.

He looked as if he was not of this world, beautiful and desperate.

The storm was raging outside, lightning was flashing across the sky and I didn't know what else to say to make Damiano understand what he was getting into if he wanted to be with me. I wanted to protect him, for his sake, from me.

It was when the thunder let out its loudest rumble yet that Damiano turned to me and spoke.

"You said maybe time will pull us back together again. Don't you think that time has come now? Don't get me wrong, I would gladly spend a lifetime waiting for you to come clean with yourself so that you can love me like you imagine if that meant we could be together again, but I don't know if we can ever be like other couples, I don't know if I even want that. Your past is a scar that you will carry into your future, you can't forget it, just like I can't forget you.", his voice was low.

"I'm not leaving you just because you're broken, I want to pick up your pieces and help you heal. You always act like it's impossible for me to be with you because you're so broken, but it matters what I think, it matters if I'm capable of having you in my life, and I am! I wouldn't have it any other way, Coraline!"He left me speechless. His loud and angry words sounded like pure poetry and they were meant for me alone.

I hadn't even noticed how the tears began to run down my cheeks, but they did. Silently and secretly. I felt the salt water of the tears on my lips. I was the sea. This sentence had burnt itself into my brain so much.

"But you said it yourself, Damiano. You said it in this song. Sea is inside of me and the sea drowns everything that comes near it. I don't want you to drown in my waves!", I spoke again much louder than before, Damiano's and my tempers were heated and like the storm that was raging outside, a storm raged between us.

"Well maybe my love for the sea is greater than my fear of drowning", his voice was raspy, rough and loud. Angry.

I sobbed as he crossed the distance between us, his hands finding my cheeks and wiping away the tears that ran down like a river. The startling gentleness of that touch was in harsh contrast to the angry words that had left his lips.

While the storm raged around us, Damiano lowered his head and looked into my eyes.

The deep brown was unfathomable, the pain and desire was in them.

"Coraline," he whispered much more softly than before, then his lips met mine and I was overcome by the most incredible feeling I had ever felt.

It wasn't our first kiss, but it felt like it was. His lips kept gently brushing mine, I felt the love he had for me with every touch. The thunder, no matter how loud, died away in my ears, while it felt like there was only Damiano and me in this universe.

I don't know how long we kissed, how long our lips met again and again, doing the dance of our lives, until Damiano broke away from me and rested his forehead against mine.

"Do you understand what I mean now?" he asked me with a slight smile, his breath quickening and I was sure his heart was beating just as fast as mine.

"Yes, yes I understand what you mean. I'm so sorry Damiano, I only ever wanted the best for you.", the tears had dried up but they seemed to come back into my eyes as I said this. The sheer magnitude of his love for me made me want to cry.

"The best thing for me is to be with you, Coraline.", he whispered and kissed my lips again, this time very briefly and light as a feather.

"I love you, Damiano," I said sincerely, looking into the eyes that I loved so much.

"And I love you, Coraline. Always," he replied so softly that I almost couldn't hear it anymore, then he put his lips on mine again and it felt like the hole in my heart was finally closed.

I wasn't healed, I was still broken, but I had Damiano, he loved me, and I loved him. Together we could do anything.

poem credit: n.m. sanchez

[pjisskullourful]

. . ╰──╮𝕘𝕒𝕪 𝕖𝕟𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙╭──╯ . .

👻Damiano X Ethan X reader

🌈 rainbow family part 4[complete series]

NSFW!  🚨swearing & mentions of naughty nighttime activities

° Damiano David & Ethan Torchio & female reader insert [throuple style] ||| Victoria de Angelis, Thomas Raggi & OC babies: Cosmo, Marsha & Sylvia

° 5 years on- the Happily Ever After of the throuple is going strong as they prepare for the next chapter in their relationship ||| Cosmo is 5, the twins are 2 & a new Måneskin album needs to be recorded

wordcount:      7,445

° thankyou to @superchrystaldrug for letting me brainstorm ideas & for encouraging my ridiculously fluffy headcanons💋

° I AM CORRECTING HISTORY!! haddon hall (where bowie lived/recorded so many iconic albums- late 60s & early 70s, the ziggy years!) was demolished in the 80s. but this is my fantasy & if i say that haddon hall was never demolished, then guess what- that mansion was never demolished & still stands in Beckenham. thankyou & happy reading

Haddon Hall - a mansion in England where David Bowie had lived and worked during the most pivotal moment of his career. It had been his home from 1969 to 1972 and now, for the summer, it was the home of you, your kids, the four members of Måneskin and Chili the dog. They hoped to tap into some of the magic that Bowie had sourced to create Ziggy Stardust, as they wrote their new album, recording from the modern studio that had been outfitted long after Bowie's time at the address.

It was an effort to shut out everything else and tackle the overwhelming feat of bringing a new collection of original music into the world, to write a new piece of Måneskin's history that would represent where they currently stood. They had the pressure of all of their past accomplishments and so many eyes upon them. They needed to get away from the other voices trying to chime in - the record company, producers, their manager. It had to be about the four of them again, a safe haven to create.

But there wasn't any option of you staying in Italy, away from your boyfriends for that time. Your kids needed their daddies close. There would be a distinction between work time and downtime - but there needn't be any separation between your family.

It was hardly a typical family summer holiday - but in his five years of life, you didn't think Cosmo had known many typical experiences.

The bed in the master suite was smaller than what you were used to sharing at home, it was similar to the size you had owned during the first few years of your relationship with Ethan and Damiano. 

At first, you were mostly just relieved that you didn't have a growing baby in your stomach to rob some of the limited space of the mattress. But the closeness had led to some unexpected results - a tangle of legs was a perfect starting point for intimacy. And soon the three of you were moving in even closer, rediscovering one another's bodies and eliminating all of the space between you. You woke up with an erection poking you in the small of your back and you asked Damiano if he needed help handling that. What started off as teasing could easily escalate when your crotch was already lined up with Ethan's.

You were sleep deprived but happy. There was something in the air here in Beckenham that had lust pumping through your veins when one of your boyfriends gave you a certain look.

It had been the fourth night in a row - a feat unheard of since having Cosmo. You didn't fall asleep until after 3am, three naked bodies weaved together, blissfully happy but exhausted.

This was how Cosmo found you, bursting into the room after hammering on the shut door. It was barely past 3.30 but you all jolted awake, you were so close to the edge of the mattress that you almost tumbled out to the ground.

"Mama, Mama!" He wasn't crying, but there was definitely a panic in his voice. You switched on the lamp, grabbing for the sheet. "I saw a ghost."

"Ghost?" Ethan asked from beside you.

Cosmo came into the light and you were relieved to see his cheeks were dry. His hair was sticking up in all directions and you could tell that he had been recently awoken from a deep sleep.

You extended your arms out and he jumped up into the bed, crawling roughly across your body (when had he gotten so solid and heavy?) to put himself between you and Ethan. Damiano propped himself up, reaching over to smooth down some of Cosmo's hair.

"What happened baby Mo-mo?" You asked.

Cosmo sat up on the pillow, making sure he had the attention of all three of you as he started to explain. "I woke up 'cause I thought I- I heard something and so I woke up and then I see'd something- I see'd something glowing…" He was out of breath, talking loudly. "It was like a… uh, like a tall man and he was glowing, like the moon."

Damiano had gotten out of bed, pulling on a pair of underwear. There was a serious look on his face. "Did he say anything to you?"

"Nuh-uh. He just kinda pointed at me."

"Do you want me to come with?" Ethan offered.

"No, stay with Moe."

Although there wasn't any chance that someone could have broken in, the property was secured behind a fence, it was a private residence. But Damiano was prepared to take your son's words seriously, awakened into a state of focus. He switched on the hallway light and headed for the door directly opposite yours.

"Give him ten seconds." You told Ethan quietly.

"The ghost isn't gonna hurt Papa, is it?"

Ethan pulled the wide-eyed toddler into his arms, rocking him ever so slightly. "No way, there aren't any mean ghosts in this house, Mo-mo."

"All clear." Damiano shouted out from the other room. But he didn't immediately come back, probably performing double-checks on the window locks and in the wardrobe.

"Yeah, there's only nice ghosts here." You said to Cosmo who was beginning to settle in against Ethan. "'Cause the people who lived here were so happy. They were sharing their gifts with each other and then the world. This is a special place where creative people found their voices, they found the right colours to paint with and they made so much beautiful art here." You could see that his eyelids were looking heavier, that excited look out of his eyes. "What you saw was just one of those artists, they probably keep an eye on the house, like fairies, keeping that creativity alive. No scary ghosts, I promise you baby."

"He didn't look all that scary." Cosmo said, resting his head down onto the pillow.

"Yeah, maybe he used to stay in that room and he was just checking out how you had decorated it." Ethan said as Damiano returned to the room, looking far more relaxed.

"It must've been a shy ghost, he didn't wanna hang out with me." He climbed back into the bed, lying down behind Ethan.

"Don't take it personally Papa." Cosmo said.

"Thanks babe." Damiano said, half-laughing. "Are we ready to go back to sleep?"

"I get to stay here?"

"Yes Moe, you can sleep here." You said and you reached out, shutting the light off.

"Why are you all naked?" His little voice asked and there was an awkward pause, seemingly the other two were waiting for you to take the responsibility of answering this.

"Because buddy, Papa spilt his tea over on the chair that all of our jammies were on." You said and you heard Ethan snicker quietly. "We couldn't really sleep in wet clothes, could we?"

"No. You'd get sick."

"Exactly." You said.

………

The next day, you were working with Cosmo to create a sigil, drawing it out on paper - an attempt to signal to any potential ghosts that his room was his alone, not any wayward spirits. 

You didn't know what the correct protocol was in this situation - your experience with the supernatural was very limited. But you wanted to support his curiosity, you wanted him to explore this potential. You had always wanted to see a ghost and you thought this could be a positive experience. You didn’t want this to be a scary situation for him.

You had gathered the information regarding this sigil online, reading what you could in between keeping an eye on the three kids. It seemed nothing was a guarantee in the world of spirits. But it was best to set the right intentions and you didn’t see why this couldn’t be a teaching opportunity. You could show your children to respect everyone.

You had drawn the lines of the sigil, getting the basis of the protection spell perfect. Cosmo picked his favourite colours to fill in the paper, making it bright and happy.

"Do we haf'ta call in the ghostbusters? Or a psycho?" Cosmo asked, his big eyes looking up at you as you sipped your coffee.

"Psychic, honey." You corrected. "And that’s definitely something we can look into. But if we were gonna call in any ghostbusters- it’d be the lady ghostbusters.”

“Yeah.”

There were heavy footsteps coming up the staircase into the living room. Thomas appeared from out of the basement recording studio. He was rushing, only slowing down once he spotted you and the kids.

"Hey, hey, it's not about to be naptime or anything, is it?" He asked, out of breath.

"No." Sylvia shouted - her favourite word.

You checked your watch. "That is actually correct, not yet. Why?"

"We need Cozzie. Well, all of you, if you wanna… But we've got this song and we think it's good, but we need to know if it's really good, if it's good enough for Cozzie to dance to." He said.

Cosmo had jumped up, looking at you eagerly. "Can we, Mama? Can we?"

"Of course, baby." You got up from the couch. "Let's go girls." Marsha had already moved away from the horse figures she had been playing with. "Do you want Mama to carry you, Sylvie?"

"No."

Cosmo led the way down the stairs while Marsha took Thomas' hand and they slowly moved to the stairs as well. Sylvia made her own way down the staircase, taking them one at a time with her arm reached up to the banister. You shadowed her, ready to catch her, but she didn't need your help. She confidently took on the stairs, a wobble here and there, but never toppling over.

The atmosphere in the studio space was entirely different, so much energy in the air. You almost felt like you could reach a hand out and just grab some of the creativity that the musicians were currently tapping into.

Marsha had joined Ethan behind the drumkit, resting her head against his. He was her favourite person in the whole world right now - her security blanket and her walking talking teddy bear. She could always be calmed down by him and she would cling to her dada. He had become quite skilled at doing things one-handed, spending more time than not, with the toddler held at his hip. 

Sylvia had been scooped up by Damiano, but she wasn't paying much attention to him. She was looking around at all of the equipment, a look of concentration on her face. She always wanted to know exactly what was going on.

You saw Cosmo climbing up to stand on top of the desk Victoria was seated at. He was so sure of himself, making no nervous checks of how close he was to the edge. He was smiling widely and you could hear her joking with him already.

"You wanna press the button sweetie?" Damiano asked, holding Sylvia up by the speaker controls.

"No."

"You're right. I'm the one at work right now, not you. I'll do it." He caught your eye over his shoulder and winked.

He hit a few buttons and you were relieved when what came from the numerous speakers wasn't a deafening experience fitting for one of their stadium gigs. That was how they used to play new songs for you and the music got louder depending on their level of excitement. But there had been a lot more alcohol in those days and Damiano had since learnt to communicate to you with hand gestures, as opposed to yelling 'oh shit, here it comes' in your face as the song built to the crescendo.

This was a reasonable volume, loud enough to be heard clearly but not so loud that you would have children complaining about ringing in their ears for hours afterward. He started to bob to the quick tempo, smiling encouragingly to Sylvia.

"That's Papa!" She pointed to his face when the vocals came in.

Thomas was making his way to the middle of the room, nodding his head and copying the beat by tapping his fingers in the air. He was watching Cosmo, trying to inspire dancing from the 5-year-old.

You heard the restrained moment that signalled the build up to the chorus. Thomas had started to pump his fist above his head and Cosmo watched him, swaying his little body.

Then the drums came back in, quicker than before and Cosmo's face truly lit up. He cheered and jumped onto the floor, moving over to where Thomas was clapping. The two of them started to shuffle around each other, arms thrown about.

Damiano had come over to your side, shimmying his shoulders. He was singing to Sylvia, who was swinging her legs in time to the music. You let him take your hand and lift it above your head, sending you into a twirl.

Looking across the room, you saw that Marsha had one of the drumsticks in her hand. She was using it as a fairy wand, much to Ethan's amusement.

"What about this bit Cozzie?" Thomas asked. "Maybe we should dance lower for this bit."

"Yeah, lower." Cosmo mimicked Thomas' movements, bending his knees and bobbing down with each beat.

But when the next chorus began, Cosmo sprang back to his feet. He started to twirl around and Victoria cheered, her phone out, pointed to the excited kid. The smile on his face got bigger as he kept dancing in his little circle.

"He likes it, he really likes it." You told Damiano. "And why wouldn't he? It's great."

"Yeah, you like it?" He asked.

"Yeah and I liked it when you were humming it in the shower this morning and I liked it when you were humming it while you were peeling potatoes yesterday."

"It's good, huh?"

You gave him a kiss on the cheek before you got distracted by the definite end of the song. You looked to Cosmo, who had finished spinning. "Moe, what did we practice this morning?"

"Oh, right." He got a look of concentration on his face as everyone in the room watched him.

He took a couple of measured steps back then ran forward, picking both feet up at the same time. He landed upon his knees with enough momentum to slide a few inches. Then he punched the air above his head, holding this dynamic pose.

"Wow. That's your best big finish yet." Ethan said.

Thomas held his hands up to high-five Cosmo on both hands. "Awesome, you gotta show me how to do that."

"What do you think sweetie Sylvie?" Damiano asked. "Did you like it?"

"No."

"So you hated it?"

"No."

Victoria laughed. "Okay, I guess it needs some more work then…"

..........

Damiano and Thomas were the only two left in the studio at this late hour, they were locked away in the sound-proofed room, obsessing over the vocals for a ballad. The kids were all asleep, even Marsha despite her not being tucked into bed like her siblings. 

She had refused to settle, whinging and forcing out some sobs anytime Ethan attempted to put her down. The only way to keep her quiet was to keep her with him. Her tears had dried as she twirled some of his hair around her fingers, perfectly comfortable wrapped up in his arms.

She didn’t stir when he joined you and Victoria at the dining table, she peacefully slept on as he was dealt into your game of poker. You were using pieces of candy in the place of betting chips.

“Remember when we used to play strip poker?” Victoria asked, surrendering more jellybeans to Ethan.

“Yeah, and you were just as terrible then.” He said, he was pushing his newly-won items into the order he had established, divided up into six colour groups, beginning with red and finishing in purple.

A sudden movement off to the left caught your eye and you quickly looked around, expecting to see Chili. But there was nothing there, that side of the room was empty, everything undisturbed.

“Babe, it’s your turn.” Ethan said and you turned back to the table. “Are you alright?”

“I thought I saw… where’s the dog?” You asked and she grabbed the paw of the puppy in her lap, raising this up to wave at you. “Oh, he’s been there this whole time, hasn’t he?”

“Yeah, is everything okay?” She asked.

You shook your head. “It’s nothing, I’m sure it’s nothing.” He gave your knee a squeeze. “I must’ve just spent too long today talking and thinking about ghosts, so now I think I’m seeing them.”

“So, you believe Moe, you reckon he really saw a ghost last night?” She asked, considering you over the top of her wine glass.

“Well I believe in ghosts.” He said. “I may not have seen any, but that doesn’t mean they’re not real.”

"They've gotta be, right? Otherwise, what's the option? Just nothingness, like Neverending Story?"

She shook her head. "Don't even go there… That movie just ruined me when I was a kid. Moe asked me if I wanted to watch it with him the other day, and I'm sorry you guys, but I lied to the baby. I said that I had to help Thomas write a letter to River. I don't know why, but that was the first thing I could think of."

“Maybe I’m just getting too into the idea of being in a space inhabited by Bowie, but do we need to consider the option that it could be his ghost?” You asked.

“I think that no matter what, when we’re doing press, we say that yes, we were definitely being visited by the spirit of David Bowie.”

He shifted uncomfortably, readjusting his hold on Marsha. “Isn’t that a little, um, disrespectful to his memory?”

“Oh please.” Victoria said. “It’s not like we’re saying he’s an incubus who was trying to impregnate me…”

“Who did what?” Thomas asked loudly, announcing his emergence from the studio. 

“I’m just saying we could say far worse. And right now, we don’t have any evidence to suggest that it isn’t Bowie’s ghost…”

Damiano had come into the room following the guitarist and he moved over to put his hands over the ears of a completely oblivious Marsha. “Don’t say stuff like that in front of my baby.”

“Besides, it can’t be Bowie.” Thomas said, leaning down to help himself to some of Ethan’s candy winnings, disrupting the rainbow as he did so. “He’s a Buddhist so he’s probably already been reincarnated. They cremated him and scattered his ashes in Bali. Why would he come back here and repeat himself?” Ethan slapped Thomas’ hand away before anymore of his jellybeans could be stolen.

You sighed as Damiano placed his arms around your shoulders. “I can’t figure out if that’s depressing or comforting…”

“Either way, I’m sleepy and I’m gonna take this as an opportunity to tap out before Ethan starts lecturing Thomas for ruining the game and having no respect for the game of poker.” Victoria said and she downed the rest of her wine before standing up. She patted the thick fur on Chili’s head, the dog quite content to be carried around by her. “Come on Chili, last call to do your business.”

She left for the backyard, with Thomas soon after bidding the three of you goodnight, retiring to his bedroom upstairs.

Ethan looked at you - his eyes signalling a mild element of distress, either his arm had fallen asleep or he needed to pee. It was clear that this cuddle with Marsha had run its course for him. “Do you think- it’s worth a try- oh, but she could-”

“Darling, that baby is drooling on you. She is most definitely asleep. Just move slowly and make sure Big Ted is there to prop her against.” You said.

“Right.” He began to get up, a look of deep concentration on his face as he did so. “You two are gonna come up soon, yeah? ‘Cause I don’t have a Big Ted substitute for you…”

“Yes, honey.”

Damiano grabbed his hand before your boyfriend could take more than two steps away from the table. “Hey, happy birthday baby, it’s after one.”

“Oh, it is?”

Damiano put a hand to Ethan’s cheek, bringing him in for a soft kiss. Ethan stroked his back, the two of them sharing a smile. "Happy birthday, my love."

"I love you." Ethan pecked him again then stepped aside, moving over to give you a kiss. "And I love you."

You cupped his face, standing up to give him a deeper kiss. "Happy birthday baby daddy. Go put that baby to bed." You patted his chest. "We'll be up soon…"

He left for the staircase, one hand keeping Marsha steady. You turned to Damiano, putting your arms around his waist, with him embracing you. He placed some kisses across your forehead and you were ready to cuddle him for the rest of the night, as long as you could.

“Did you get the song finished?”

He groaned. “No, it just doesn’t… there’s something about it, that’s off.” You pushed your hands into the back pockets of his jeans. “I don’t know what it is, but I feel like I’m not singing it right. Every time I finish a take, I think that I could’ve done it better. I don’t know how and it’s getting frustrating, so we just… we are gonna come back to it later.”

“You’ll get it Daddy, you’ll find the magic.” You said, giving his butt a couple of encouraging pats. “You always do. How’s your throat? Do you want me to make you some tea?”

“I’ll get it myself. You should go cuddle our man, get him warm for me.”

You smiled and kissed him. “You don’t have to tell me twice.”

You let go of him, with him going into the kitchen while you went in the opposite direction to go back to the dining table. From the table you collected your phone and the baby monitor.

“I’m gonna-”

A squawk of upset sobbing interrupted your sentence, one of the girl’s voices coming through the speaker clearly.

“No, I’m not gonna go to bed. I’m gonna go check on that child.” You said to Damiano.

“Sylvie.” He said.

“It’s gotta be.” You agreed, heading for the stairs. “The way that girl is teething- you’d think she was a shark.”

“‘Cause sharks have so many rows of teeth, very good.” He said sarcastically. “And yet, it’s me who gets accused of making all the dad jokes.”

You made your way into the bedroom the twin girls were sharing. You found Ethan was already in there, holding Sylvia and in the process of trying to soothe her. Marsha was quietly sleeping in her own bed.

You approached Ethan in the room, illuminated only by the soothing slightly-yellow glow of the nightlight. You put your hand to Sylvia's back as she sobbed noisily, clearly putting all of her chest into it.

"It's her teeth."

"Teeth." She repeated in a pained howl.

"Oh, I know sweetie. Your teeth are so mean." You held your arms out and he placed her into your embrace.

"I'll go get your ring from the fridge, okay sweetie?"

You grabbed his wrist before he could leave to retrieve the soothing chew-toy. "No, no, no, you go to bed baby, I've got this." You started to lead the way out of the room, leaving Marsha to her rest. "I'll take care of this, you sleep."

"Are you sure?"

You bounced the crying little girl lightly. "Yes darling, please let me handle this."

He pecked you on the cheek, then kissed Sylvia on the forehead. You carried her down the stairs, cooing and patting her back - without managing to stall her crying at all.

"It's okay, baby. Mama's got ya, it's okay."

"Teeth." She weeped again.

"I know, I know. Shh." You entered the kitchen, heading directly for the fridge. Damiano put down his cup of tea as you grabbed out the chilled ring of silicone cushions. It fit easily into her hand - one of the water-filled bubbles curled into her fist while she deposited another into her mouth. “There we go - aw, isn’t that so much better?”

“Sylvie, why are your teeth so mean?” He asked, giving her ankle an affectionate squeeze.

You shut your eyes as you held your daughter close to your chest, rocking her gently and continuing to make shushing sounds. She wouldn’t abruptly stop crying and you hadn’t expected as much. She had to work herself down, but she was noticeably quieter. This would probably delay your own bedtime by about an hour and there was never any guarantee that she would settle back into bed - her inflamed gums may just irritate her all night.

“Let me.” The transfer to his arms went smoothly. “I can’t go to sleep yet, I’ve still gotta make Ethan’s c-a-k-e…”

Despite your arms being empty, you continued to sway, in time with how Damiano held the upset toddler. “It’s so late. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you got something from the store, it’s not gonna make him doubt your love for him.”

“No, I’ve gotta.” He said, a determined look on his face. “This is something I can’t just buy anyways. It’s gotta be special, for him.”

“Alright. But no letting this one help you.” His version of the kids helping him in the kitchen was for them to do taste tests and end up with icing on their faces before the cake was out of the oven. “I’m gonna shower but I can help you put her down after that…”

You left the kitchen to the sounds of Sylvia’s crying getting quieter. He was humming to her, something calming but unfamiliar.

Your hot shower had you feeling all the more ready to fall asleep, even if it hadn’t completely eased the sore muscles in your back. You silently pulled on pjs in the bedroom where Ethan was sound asleep.

The rest of the mansion was silent and it seemed there was no one left to soothe, no problems left to solve on this day. You went back downstairs and with every step, you anticipated to hear Sylvia crying again - you just had to get within earshot of her powerful lungs. The kitchen was empty, Damiano’s cup of tea missing from the countertop.

You made moves to track them down, finding every room empty - until you came upon the recording studio.

You let yourself into the large studio space, where all of the lights were on. You could hear Damiano singing and looking to your right, you found him sitting behind the glass wall, laying down some vocals. Sylvia was in his lap, looking quite sleepy as she carried on sucking on her teething ring. His headphones were covering only one ear as he sang to the baby more so than to the microphone.

You sat down in front of the mixing deck (the majority of its buttons were still a mystery to you - Thomas had tried to teach you some of the ‘basics’ more than once, but it never stuck). You didn’t recognise the track that Damiano was singing over and you marvelled at how it could already sound like a finished song. You felt warmth filling your stomach as you listened to the unfolding ballad.

You lamented not having your phone in hand and therefore missing the chance to make any record of this moment. It was beautiful, taking your breath away how natural he was with your kids, being able to dedicate so much of himself to them without letting his career suffer because of it. 

He finished singing and then the music reached its end. He looked down at Sylvia. “Hmm?”

“No.” She grumbled, making him laugh.

You put your finger onto the button that opened the communication from you to him and spoke into the microphone. “Hey, can you sing Beggin’ next?”

His head whipped up to look at you. “To quote our daughter: no.”

“No.” Sylvia echoed.

…………

“Dad, it’s your birthday!” Cosmo’s face was incredibly close to Ethan’s as your boyfriend remained laid out in bed. He hadn’t heard all three of the kids come into the room and part of you felt guilty for waking up from this deep slumber. But the kids were ready to burst with excitement, they wanted to lavish all of their affections upon him and holding them back wouldn’t have worked for long.

“Da-da.” Marsha sang out, the party horn between her lips was waiting to be fired off. She had to wait for Ethan to open his eyes first, that was the agreement that allowed her to have the noisemaker.

Sylvia was clinging to Damiano’s back like a monkey, bouncing as she looked over his shoulder. “Wake up, wake up.”

One of Ethan’s eyelids cracked open and Marsha gasped loudly. She blew into the party whistle, making a quick sound, before it flew out of her mouth. The toy collided with his forehead and now his eyes were completely open.

Marsha instantly moved over, puckering her lips as she did so. “Sorry Dada, I kiss better. I kiss better.”

“Papa, play the song quick.” Cosmo shouted.

It was complete mayhem, all before Ethan had been given the chance to sit up or even say anything. Marsha was covering his forehead in enthusiastic kisses as Damiano pressed a button to play the song he had queued up.

“When does he get to bit where we sing- where we sing happy birthday?” Sylvia demanded to know over the sound of the Stevie Wonder song’s intro.

“Happy birthday Dada.” Marsha said, throwing her arms around Ethan as he slowly began to lift himself up.

He pulled her into his embrace, his reactions delayed as he struggled to pull himself out of sleep. But he was smiling as he slowly looked around himself, getting a lay of the landscape that had appeared during his slumber.

“Happy birthday Dad.” Cosmo sprang forward next. “We made you a crown.” He brought the wreath of plastic leaves and flowers out from behind his back. The three of them had spent a lot of time getting the order of the coloured flowers exactly right, completing the headwear with assistance from Victoria.

“A crown?” Ethan repeated, eyes lighting up at the sight of the rainbow flower crown. “You made me a crown? Oh, that’s so beautiful. Do I get to wear it?”

“Yes, silly.” Cosmo said, moving to place the decorated ring onto Ethan’s head himself. “It’s your birthday so you’ve gotta wear it, all day.”

“And I’m going to.” Ethan said, the bright flowers nestled perfectly upon his un-brushed hair. “You couldn’t pay me to stop wearing this.”

Damiano led the singing when the chorus came in. “Happy birthday to ya. Happy birthday to ya.” Cosmo was clapping along to the beat while Sylvia went over to take up the remaining space in Ethan’s lap. “Happy birth-daaaay.”

Ethan nodded his head from side-to-side, a twin in each arm as Cosmo fixed his father’s hair. They were all smiling - for once Sylvia wasn’t on the verge of saying no. 

You looked to the opposite side of the bed where Damiano was watching this pandemonium. He caught your eye and smiled at you - making you wonder if he was thinking the same thing as you, thinking about how much quieter birthday mornings used to be. They could get loud, but that was usually worked up to - in fact, it was on Ethan’s birthday that the twins had been conceived. 

You heard laughter from the doorway, spotting Victoria and Thomas watching. Victoria had her phone in hand, the camera pointed to the bed. Thomas’ hair was sticking up in all directions and he rubbed his eye with the back of his hand, but he was amused nonetheless.

“We gotta make the birthday daddy his coffee.” She said, approaching the bed as the kids joined in on the second chorus. “Who wants to help and we can get all the presents together on the table for him?”

You gave Cosmo a few pats on the back to get his attention. “Everyone- everyone wants to help make Dada some coffee, don’t you?”

“Yeah.” Cosmo said, successfully tricked into leaving the room.

Victoria grabbed Sylvia from the bed and kissed Ethan on the cheek. “Happy birthday.”

“Cozzie, I’m half-asleep so I hope that you know what kind of coffee Dada likes…” Thomas said, taking Cosmo’s hand and beginning into the hallway. “‘Cause I don’t know where to start. How do you make coffee, we put jelly in there, right?”

He laughed. “No, silly Billy.”

“My name’s Tom…”

“No, not when you’re being silly, then you’re Billy.”

“Billy!” Sylvia cheered.

Once everyone else was out of the room, Damiano shut the door. With the music turned off, it was almost silent, almost peaceful. You moved over to snuggle into Ethan’s side, putting an arm around his middle.

“Your birthday wish wasn’t to sleep late, was it?” You asked as he linked his fingers through yours.

“No.”

“He’s too realistic for that.” Damiano commented, placing himself at Ethan’s other side and kissing him noisily on the cheek. “Happy birthday baby daddy.”

“Thank you.” He kissed Damiano quickly then kissed the top of your head. “And thank you.”

“We could try to delay them if you wanna go back to sleep for a while…” You said.

“No, it’s fine, I promise. I think I got enough sleep.” He said. “You idiots on the other hand- did either of you come to bed, like, at all?"

“Umm…”

“I got to Sylvia’s bed and I was just gonna lay down with her for a sec’.” Damiano said. “And then it was morning and Marsha was poking me.”

"We've got a fairy-themed tea party organised for this afternoon, so be prepared to wear wings and have glitter everywhere." You said.

"Yeah, I just hope it's gay enough for you…"

Ethan sat forward, flicking his hair back off of his shoulders. "Of course it will, did you not see my freakin' crown?"

.........

“Caw caw.”

You whipped your head around to where this sound had come from - finding Thomas and Sylvia standing at the edge of the sitting parlour. She was eagerly smiling, holding onto both of his hands and standing on his feet.

The other two adults in the room hadn’t noticed and so you were able to get up, responding to the signal without attracting any attention your way. Under the numerous cords of fairy-lights, Ethan and Victoria were too concentrated on the game of snap they were sharing with Cosmo. You had been playing as well, but after losing too many head-to-head rounds you had retired to the closeby couch instead.

It had been a fun day, everyone running around in colourful wings, so much laughter (a highlight for you had been an impromptu photoshoot out in the afternoon sun, Ethan in the sunshine, wearing his crown and wings as he pushed the twins on the swings - you had never seen someone so content with their place in the world). 

But you were exhausted, already looking forward to the twins' bedtime at six-thirty. Even though this was a more laid-back party than all the hoopla that went into any birthday celebration for the kids, you could still feel that your energy had died off and you weren't anticipating a second wind anytime soon.

You followed Sylvia and Thomas into the kitchen, where Damiano was lighting the last of the candles that decorated this slab of cake.

"My bird call was good, huh Mama?" Sylvia said.

"It was amazing, sweetie and it sounded so realistic that nobody else heard it." You said.

"Wow, maybe one day she could grow up to be a spy." Thomas said and her eyes grew wide with excitement - you weren't certain that she had learnt the word spy yet, but she was just thrilled to be complimented.

"I figure me and Tom will carry it, and you and Sylvie can get everyone's attention by singing Happy Birthday." Damiano said.

"Gre-"

"No." Sylvia declared.

But before anyone had the chance to stop her, she had spun around, confidently making her way out of the kitchen. "Haaa-ppy…"

"Okay, shit, we're going now, I guess." Thomas said, shuffling over to help Damiano lift the cake.

You rushed out after her. She was skipping her way across the floor, singing as she went. You started to sing as well, trying to impress upon Ethan that everything was going according to plan. Despite not being in on the plan, Cosmo and Marsha didn’t have to be told what was going on - they were singing as well. Victoria had pulled her phone out, recording Ethan as the presentation of the cake unfolded.

“Cake.” Marsha exclaimed as she climbed up to sit in Ethan’s lap.

“Happy birthday grandpa.” Thomas said and he ruffled Ethan’s hair once the cake was placed onto the table before him.

“Is this a giant ice-cream sandwich?” He asked, mouth agape and his eyes wide with genuine wonder that only he could tap into. There were times when he seemed equal to the kids on a level of how easily he could be amazed. This was due to him refusing to take anything for granted - he wanted to be delighted by life.

Damiano was smiling, practically glowing with pride as he crouched down next to Ethan’s chair. “Not just an ice-cream sandwich, babe. If you’ll remember for me- Australia, 2023 and we discovered the ice-cream sandwich you had been waiting your whole life to discover.”

Ethan looked about as shocked as he had upon you telling him you were pregnant, both times. “It’s a Golden Gaytime?” Damiano nodded, watching Ethan’s reactions as Marsha inched forward, aiming to start blowing out the candles. “Where did you find a Gaytime cake?”

“I made it for you, my love. Happy birthday.”

Ethan continued to be shocked almost-speechless. He just stared at Damiano, unable to believe what your boyfriend had created. Then Ethan grabbed Damiano to pull him in closer and cover his face in kisses, making Damiano laugh.

“Dada, Dada! You gotta blow- you gotta put the candles out. ‘Else your wish won’t come true.” Marsha insisted, tugging on Ethan’s arm to get his attention.

“It’s so many candles though, baby. I’m gonna need a lot of help. Sylvie, Mo-mo - can you please help us?”

Damiano had gotten to his feet, moving over to stand next to you. You instantly wrapped your arms around his waist, needing something to hug as this adorable moment brought threatening tears to your eyes. The two of you watched, independent and not needed for this moment as the three kids sat upon Ethan’s lap. You could just watch and admire, admire how this interaction could not get any closer to perfection than what it already was.

“We made that.” Damiano whispered to you as the four other members of your family noisily blew the candles flames out (Sylvia by far the most enthusiastic).

“You made the cake.” You said.

“I meant the family, sweet thing.” He corrected gently. “That’s ours, that fairytale that we somehow plucked out of the air and brought into reality.” You held him tighter, face buried into his shirt as Thomas helped Ethan begin to cut the cake up. “People can say whatever they want about traditional family values- I’d choose this every time, every second of every day in every timeline.

“I don’t know how we did it, but somehow, we have kids who are the perfect embodiment of our love. No one is luckier than us.”

“Shut up.” You said, your shoulders shaking as tears tracked down your cheeks. “God, you’re the worst. Why don’t you just show me Mufasa’s death scene while you’re at it?”

He cradled your face in his hands, wiping at your tears. “Sorry, I just got to thinking and- I’ll stop now. Can you forgive me?”

“To quote our daughter: no.”

He laughed, wrapping his arms securely around you again. You sniffled back any further tears that could be shed and looked over to the table again. Ethan instantly caught your eye, his brow furrowed in concern and he raised his hand- forefinger and thumb curled to form an O.

You nodded and lifted up one hand- your thumb, forefinger and pinky finger standing straight up, signing to him I love you. He smiled and blew you a kiss.

……….

“Mama, is your tummy really still mad at you?” Cosmo asked as he climbed up onto the bed where you and Damiano had been lying together.

You hadn’t been out of bed for long yet today. You had gotten up to check on the kids as Damiano got their breakfasts organised. But your stomach had curled, your throat filling with a sour taste, when he had tried to offer you a cup of coffee. You were tired (despite having just woken up) and you would have appreciated the caffeine to bring you back to life, but you feared what reaction this would set off in your tummy.

As you headed back to the bedroom, you had grabbed Ethan. Speaking quietly, you had asked if he could stop by a pharmacy during his walk with the twins, Victoria and Chili.

The five of them set off for a peaceful morning walk (Cosmo had a new video game that Thomas was teaching him how to play) while you laid out in bed, joined by Damiano. He had brought you a cup of ginger tea, which you had only taken a few tentative sips of. You rested your head on his chest, soothed by the warmth on your cheek, coupled with the rhythmic rise-and-fall and his hand stroking your hair.

Cosmo crawled closer, curiously peeking at you. You gave his cheek an affectionate pinch. “Yeah, honey. Too much birthday cake.”

“You need me to kiss your tummy better?”

“Papa’s already been trying that.”

“I can do better- I can do it better.” He said, leaning down to cover your stomach with noisily, slobbery kisses.

You rolled onto your back, giggling, helpless to push him off. He wasn’t interrupted until Ethan entered into the master bedroom, a plastic bag in hand.

“You got Mama’s medicine?” Cosmo asked.

“Sure did, buddy. Hey, Aunt Vicky said Chili still had some zoomies to get out after the walk- did you wanna go help her throw the ball around with him out back?”

“Okay.” Cosmo said, shuffling over and jumping down from the bed.

“And see if the girls wanna go with you, yeah?” Ethan said.

“Okay, Dad.” Cosmo said, disappearing out of the room and immediately shouting out the names of his little sisters.

“I didn’t get seven.” Ethan said as you got up, taking the bag from him.

“That’s alright.”

You went into the bathroom and pulled the plastic pregnancy test out of its box. You sighed as you lowered down your pants and underwear - you had a feeling that you already knew what the result would be, without needing to pee on the stick.

You made quick work of completing the test, making your way back into the bedroom to wait with your boyfriends. You put the test on the bedside table and Ethan set a timer on his phone.

You shut your eyes as you felt Damiano stroking your back. You couldn’t determine exactly when conception could have happened, there had simply been too many nights of passion during this work holiday. You were visited by memories of Ethan on top of you, your foreheads pressed together, sharing such intense eye-contact that you thought he could fuse his soul with yours. Nights of Damiano reducing you to begging as he called you that old nickname that could make your knees weak- avida.

You heard Ethan’s phone ring and you opened your eyes, looking over to where you had put the test. “Can you check for me?”

“Sure.”

Damiano placed a kiss onto your cheek and offered you a hand to squeeze. You looked at him and nodded, you were already thinking of the ways the house would have to be altered to ensure the comfort and the safety of a new baby.

“Pregnant.”

“Knew it.” You said and threw your arms into the air. 

“Well I guess we made more than an album.”

Ethan groaned. “Your dad jokes get worse with every kid…”

--- --- ---

🌈 read more of this series!!!

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[brookecuzyes]

three years of you. — cruel summer

Damiano David x GN!Musician!Reader

Main Masterlist — 3yrs Masterlist

Summary: three years is a lot of time to get to know someone. you can even learn the way that people think, but it isn’t always a good thing. (Part 2)

Word Count: ≈2.8k

Warnings: some cursing, mentions of a fetus on a plane.

A/N: I kind of made an AU here lmao. I’m incorporating the Julie and The Phantoms band from the show as the band Y/N is in. I didn’t feel like making OC’s when the main character isn’t even an OC. So… if your a JaTP fan, I hope your happy 😉😏

———————————————————————-

Devastation— severe and overwhelming shock or grief.

Devastation— that’s what Damiano felt.

His partner of three years had left to go back to Los Angeles. You didn’t even say goodbye. You only left a note.

Damiano was severely overwhelmed with shock. Or was it grief?

Regardless, Damiano felt as if a knife struck through his heart. He cried. A lot.

He wanted to call you so badly. He just wanted to apologize for all of his wrongdoings. However, he couldn’t. You were on a fourteen-hour flight, you were probably asleep and your phone was probably on airplane mode.

He had to get to the studio. The band was still recording the album. He just felt like he couldn’t bring himself to do anything. But, the thing is, you couldn’t either.

——

Victoria picked up on Damiano's behavior almost immediately. She saw how gloomy he was, but she couldn’t get it out of him— whatever it was. But, what she did know is that you and him were having troubles, so she messaged you.

Hey, is everything ok between you and Dami? she texted.

No.

What’s going on?

I’m going back home, Vic. The plane just landed.

Wait, you did what?

I’m getting off the plane, I’ll text you when I’m at Alex’s.

Alex was the drummer of the band. He was taller, blonde, and an absolute sweetheart. He was one of your closest friends— though, the entire band is like a family to you. Your band is called Julie and The Phantoms. It consisted of you and your friends: Alex, Julie, Luke, and Reginald— or Reggie. You guys have been together as a band since high school. You were the newer addition, joining a few months later after the band was formed.

You had texted Alex after the plane took off. He said he would pick you up from the airport, which you were glad to hear. But, you knew he’d ask why you got back so early. You were in Italy, for crying out loud— why would you want to go back home a few days before you needed to? You probably won’t be getting to his apartment for the next few hours, though, so you could reach out to her later in the day.

While she had the time on her hands, Victoria was going to try and pry the information out of him— just so she can get an idea of what’s going on.

“Dami,” she called out after he announced a small break for the band. “How are you?”

“Oh, I’m OK,” he replied, not making eye contact. He was messing around with some stuff that was just lying around, trying to organize it— something he does so he doesn’t stress out.

“How’s Y/N. You guys seemed pretty upset last night.” Damiano dropped the microphone that he was holding. Shit, he whispered under his breath. “Damiano? Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, everything’s fine…” Nothing’s fine, he thought to himself. He wanted to scream, cry. He wanted to just stop everything that he was doing and try to find you, make things right when he knew he couldn’t. However, Victoria’s prying wasn’t doing him any good.

“Here let me help, you seem stressed,” she said, bending down to help him with all of his stuff.

“No! No, I don’t need your help, Vic,” he responded, raising his voice. “Please, just… leave me alone? Ok?” He put the microphone on the table and grabbed his papers, walking out of the studio to who knows where. As he was leaving, Ethan and Thomas walked back in, Damiano pushing past them as he walked by.

“Was he crying?” Asked Thomas.

“He was?” Victoria asked.

“Yeah, what happened,” joined Ethan.

“It’s Y/N… but I’m not sure what happened.”

“Are they ok?” Thomas asked, concern filling his voice.

“No, they’ve been arguing lately. But, I don’t want to say what, it’s really not my business to share.” The guys frowned slightly.

“Maybe they broke up?”

“Thomas, they didn’t-“ Ethan started, but stopped once he heard the door open. Everyone turned around to see Damiano standing at the door.

“Hey, is everything alright?” He asked, confused as to why Ethan was about to go off on Thomas.

“Y-yeah, everything is fine. Thomas was just being annoying,” Ethan tried explaining.

“Hey, how’s Y/N?” Thomas asked, causing Victoria to smack his arm. Damiano’s eyes saddened. He looked at Victoria and sighed.

“Vic, can we talk?” He asked, walking out of the doorway. She gave him a small yeah and walked out of the room, following Damiano into the hallway.

“Is everything ok, Damiano?”

“No. She left.” And her heart dropped to her feet.

“Oh.” Victoria already knew, but she didn’t know how to respond.

“Yeah, she went back to LA. Said something about the band.”

“Did she talk to you?” Damiano just looked at her, reaching into his jacket pocket to reveal a paper. Your paper. He handed it to Victoria and she unfolded it, reading it intently.

“Oh, my god…” she whispered, looking up at Damiano. When she finished reading it, she handed it back to him. He slowly put it back. “What are you going to do?”

“Nothing.” He replied blatantly, making Victoria’s expression change completely.

“What do you mean, ‘nothing’?” She asked. Damiano shrugged.

“She doesn’t like me right now. I messed up, Vic. I want to give her space.” Tried explaining.

“Ok, then, next time, don’t say, ‘nothing.’ Makes it sound like you don’t care.” He nodded. “But, eventually, you are gonna do something, right?”

“I mean, yeah, I guess.”

“Damiano David, that is a yes or no question, you cannot answer with a, ‘maybe’.” Victoria said sternly. “Don’t you still want her.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Wait, you don’t want her anymore?” Damiano opened his mouth to speak, but Victoria’s phone started ringing. She pulled it out of her back jeans pocket and looked at the contact. It was you.

“Uh, I’m sorry, my mother is calling. Give me a minute,” she lied, walking to the exit of the building at the end of the hallway. When she reached the outside, she pressed the call button, putting the phone to her ear.

“Vic, I can talk now.”

——

The flight home was treacherous. You absolutely hated it. There was a couple and their baby sitting next to you. Well, the mother was sitting next to you, the father sat in the next row over to be closer.. You wanted to try and sleep since you hadn’t been getting good sleep lately. Now, you’re just going to have to work with jet lag— which was kind of going to happen since this is a fourteen hour flight. It’s OK, though. At least the baby was cute.

While you were getting off of the plane, Victoria texted you, asking about you and Damiano. You gave her vague details— kept it short and sweet, even though you felt very short-tempered and bitter. You walked around the airport, trying to find the luggage claim when you see Alex standing around. You smile and walk up to him, calling his name out so you don’t scare him. He turned his head and was met with a very sleep-deprived person. He smiled at you, so he started walking closer and held his arms out. You practically fell into his arms, needing the hug so greatly. You two stayed like that for a while before he pulled away to look at you.

“You okay?” He asked, putting his hand on your face.

“Yeah, I’m okay. I just need to sleep. There was a baby sitting next to me.” Alex chuckled slightly.

“Gimme your bag, I’ll carry them,” he said, going behind you to start taking it off but you moved away.

“No, it’s fine, I can carry it.”

“No, you’re about to pass out. Relax, Y/N.”

“Exactly, this is the only thing keeping me up. You can help me carry the other bags. Those are heavier than my backpack.” You said, started to walk off. Alex followed, putting an arm around your shoulders.

“Ok, you can carry it.”

Baggage claim took awhile since you had quite a few bags. You still left some stuff at Damiano’s house because you were in a rush, but you did grab the essentials. Alex grabbed two of your bags and you got one, excluding the backpack. He led you outside to where he parked his car and opened the door for you.

“Such a gentleman,” you teased him. You got in and he closed the door once he saw all of your legs in. You sighed, relieved that life would start becoming somewhat normal again. Alex was putting all of the bags into the trunk of his car. You took the few seconds you had to yourself to just try to relax.

It was about a thirty minute car ride to get to Alex’s apartment. You would be staying with him for at least tonight, then you’d go back to your house later on— sometime before the group hangout. Ten minutes into the ride, nothing much had been said, until Alex started asking all of his questions.

“So… Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“I guess. I just don’t know where to start.”

“At the beginning. When did everything start going downhill?”

“When he started talking to another girl,” you responded nonchalantly. Alex took a second to process what the hell you just said.

“He did what?”

“Her name’s Giorgia. I looked her up, she’s a model. And gorgeous.”

“Hey,” he said, grabbing your hand, “you are, too.”

“I’m not insecure, just upset. Alex, he told me that he wasn’t coming home at decent times and why he was being distant— he said he was talking to her instead.” Your voice broke at the end. The car went quiet for a few minutes.

“Is there anything that I can do?” Alex asked.

“No, I don’t think so.” Silence fell once again, and it stayed that way for a while. At some point, Alex turned on the radio, but kept the volume down. It was just for some background noise, which you had come to the conclusion that it helped him focus better. He almost always had music on if it was quiet, or if he was alone. You weren’t paying attention to the music now, though. You were too focused on why Damiano would betray you like that.

You got to Alex’s house in what felt like two seconds. When you got there, his boyfriend, William, was on the couch on his laptop— working, probably. He was a dancer for this company he had been with since everyone was in high school. He seemed to enjoy it, though the company owner always seemed a little sketchy.

“Hi, Willie!” You greeted. He got up from the couch to give you a hug.

“Hey, Y/N, how are you?”

“Eh, I’ve been OK. How are you?”

“I’m good. Sore. Caleb’s preparing us for this insane dance comp. and it’s definitely testing my limits.” You from both laughed, when you heard the door open. Alex had two of your suitcases in his hands.

“Oh, shit, I should help. I’m sorry,” you said, making your way to the door.

“It’s OK, I can get it,” Alex responded, moving the suitcases into the living room.

“No, really. I’ll be right back.” You went outside to the car to grab your other suitcases. You checked the front of the car to see if you left anything, and saw that you left your phone in there.

Victoria, I need to call her, you thought. You put your phone in your pocket and grabbed your bags, heading back inside.

“Here let me show you where you’re sleeping tonight,” William said, gesturing you to follow him. Alex got the other two suitcases behind you and lugged them to the room. William showed you to a nice guest bedroom. “This is where you’ll stay. Hopefully you have everything you might need. If not, just ask us.”

“This is great! Thanks, guys,” you thanked.

“Of course!”

“I’m gonna go outside for a second, I need to call Victoria.” You announced, following the guys out of the room. You walked over to the front door, and walked out of the house. You pulled out your phone and opened up Victoria’s contact and pressed the call button. It rang a few times before she picked up.

“Vic, I can talk now.”

“Hey, how was the flight?” she asked.

“It was fine. I couldn’t sleep, though,” you replied, recalling the baby on the plane.

“Damiano showed me the letter.”

“Did you talk to him?”

“Yeah, he was just telling me everything. He’s not doing okay.”

“Me neither. And if he wasn’t feeling okay, he should’ve told me months ago.”

“I know. I know.”

“Victoria, I don’t know what to do,” your voice started cracking. “I’m not crazy, right? For leaving?”

“No, no, you’re not crazy. You just need some time to process things. Once you’ve gotten to that point, you can sit down with Dami and have a grown-up conversation with him— if that’s what you guys want to do.” Victoria suggested.

“That’s what I’ve been wanting to do. He’d rather have a grown-up conversation with this other girl than he would with me.” You heard whispering on the other end of the phone and Victoria yelling.

“Thomas, stai zitto! I’m on a call.”

“Oh, is everyone there?”

“Yeah. Thomas is. He’s being annoying.”

“I wanna say hi!”

“Ok. Thomas, she wants to say hi.”

“Hi, Y/N!” You heard Thomas say. You could practically hear him smiling through the phone. You loved how excited he could get.

“Hi, Thomas! How are you?”

“I’m great! Vic said that you went back home. Is everything alright?”

“Oh, yeah… it’s fine. Some stuff just came up. Plus, the band is about to start recording a new album, so I needed to be here anyway.”

“Ok. Well, we need to get back to the studio. Do you want to talk to Dami?”

You went silent for a few seconds, not sure of how to respond. “No, I actually need to get back to what I’m doing.”

“Oh, ok. Have fun in LA.” Thomas said.

“Have fun in Italy, Thomas.” You responded with a giggle.

“Bye, Y/N!” Victoria and Thomas said at the same time, which caused them to start laughing. You followed along with the laughing.

“Bye, you guys. Vic, I’ll probably end up talking to you later.”

“Ok, get some sleep, babe. You need it.”

“Absolutely! Bye.” You ended the call. You stayed outside for a few extra seconds, taking in that Los Angeles air that you had been away from for the whole summer. Over four months spent with the love of your life. Or, you know, whatever you would call him now. Oh, maybe, over four months spent with that bad boy, that traitor that you called your partner for three years.

Maybe you could get that opportunity to talk to him. Maybe you could have a grown-up conversation. What if this is just a big misunderstanding? If only…

——

“Dami?”

His head shot around.

“Is everything okay? You’ve been out here for a while. We tried calling you. We have to get back inside,” Thomas explained, walking closer but keeping distance if that’s what Damiano wanted.

“Oh, sorry, I was thinking. I’ll be right there.”

“Ok.” Thomas, knowing he wasn’t going to get anything else out of him, walked back inside and made his way to the studio.

To be more accurate, Damiano was lost in his thoughts. All he could think about was how badly he fucked up. You were everything he ever needed, and everything he could ever want. But, so is Giorgia. Giorgia was everything and more. She was gorgeous, and kind, and just an amazing person in general— in every way possible. There was always something missing with you to Damiano, but Giorgia filled in those blanks.

Maybe this was fine. Maybe what he did wasn’t bad. Maybe someday you could understand that. But why couldn’t he just be with you if Giorgia is the same? What if he tried again? What if he told the truth to begin with? What he didn’t do anything to begin with? If only…

…you felt that way to me. Maybe then we could be lovers again.

What a way to spend a summer.

“God,” you whispered to yourself. “What a cruel summer this has been.” A tear rolled down your cheek. You wanted to cry your soul out, but you wanted to wait until you were back at your house, alone.

A tear rolled off of Damiano’s cheek. He wanted to cry and scream, but couldn’t until he was at home, alone because you wouldn’t be there anymore.

“This isn’t right,” he whispered to himself in despair. “Oh, God, I fucked up.”

———————————————————————-8/25/21

Taglist for 3yrs— i’m so sorry if i couldn’t tag you!

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[writingmaneskin]

Home is Where the Heart is - A Damiano David Story || Chapter Thirty One

Description: Learning how to love again, how to heal and that it’s okay to move on and rebuild yourself after dealing with so much pain.

Words: 2.6k

A/N: I missed my silly children. 🙁💕 This chapter takes place not long after the last trip that they had and is still set before the beginning of Handwritten.

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Damiano was a homebody. He thrived being back in Rome and there was a sense of peace that came from the fact that his loved ones were all within reach and not a couple of hours away travelling by plane.

Being home also meant that he had the chance to get into some sort of a routine with Dante and figure out how to maintain it which would be easier now with the band taking a bit of a longer break - they all needed it. 

Eli’s life wasn’t slowing down by any means - in fact, they were busier than ever but Damiano was more than happy to be there and make sure that they have everything they needed, make sure that their family is taken care of.

“When can we meet up?” Vic texted Damiano one afternoon.

“I’m home, would you like to come over? I miss you.” 

“I miss you too. Are you alone?”

“I am. Eli is working late and my mom took Dante for the evening, so it’s just me.” 

“I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

“I’ll see you soon, sorella.” 

And true to her word, Victoria showed up at his doorstep twenty minutes later. Damiano hugged her tight and the two of them held each other for a little bit, each treasuring the comfort and the familial love between them.

“What’s up, kiddo? Do you want some tea?” 

“Tea as in gossip, or tea as in the drink?” Vic chuckled and made her way into the apartment.

“As in the drink.”

“You are such a grandpa, don’t you have something fizzy in that fridge of yours?” 

“No, best I can offer is orange juice.”

“Orange juice it is.” Vic took off her shoes and plopped herself on the sofa.

Damiano lit a cigarette and carried two glasses of orange juice to the coffee table, then sat opposite Vic so he could look at her.

“I’ve been thinking a lot with all this time that we’ve had on our hands…” Vic started.

“Is this going to turn into a lecture?”

“No, listen. We haven’t had a break in a very long time. Our lives were completely different the last time we slowed down. We were kids and now you have a kid.”

Damiano smiled.

“True.”

“I am scared.” Victoria admitted.

“Of what?”

“Of who I am without all the shows, without the constant moving around. I think I might have lost parts of myself in all the work and I am now unsure of what and who is left.”

“You have time to figure it out now.” 

“And if I spiral?”

“If you spiral,we’ll take care of you as we always have. Just because we are not together 24/7 and not constantly running ourselves into the ground working, doesn’t mean that we’ve abandoned you or that we won’t hang out, or show up if you need us.” Damiano went to give Vic a hug when he saw that her eyes were full of tears.

“I worry that I’ll lose all of you.”

“No, we are not going anywhere.” He comforted her.

“Do you want to call over the others?” 

“Yes, I miss them.” Damiano admitted. They had been texting but it just wasn’t the same.

“I miss them, all of you so much.” Vic grabbed her phone and texted Ethan and Thomas.

The boys showed up not long after the invitation and both Damiano and Victoria felt relief when they did. This was home too, these three people were part of the foundations of his home. 

“The band is all over at our place. I will likely cook for them, maybe with Ethan helping me. Did you eat today? I can maybe sneak away and bring you some food?” Damiano texted Eli before leaving his phone on the coffee table.

“Is everything okay between you and Eli?” Thomas asked, going to grab himself something cold to drink from the fridge.

“Yes. We are in a good place.” 

“I am happy to hear that. You deserve all the happiness.” The look on Thomas’ face was genuine, yet Damiano could see the sadness in his friends’ eyes.

“What about you and Tom?” 

“It’s complicated.” Thomas said, opening the bottle of sparkling water.   

“Are you trying to figure it out between each other or just avoiding the feelings altogether?” 

“I am trying to untangle the feelings and make sense of them and make sense of everything without saying anything stupid and pushing Tom away.” 

“How is that working out for you?”

“Not great. Whenever we do talk, we try to talk about feelings and when it gets awkward we just change the topic and pretend nothing ever happened.” 

“Do you want him in your life?” 

“I do.” Thomas nodded.

“Then don’t give up. I made a lot of mistakes before I got with Eli and I almost made the biggest mistake getting back together with Y/N and disregarding what I feel for Eli in favour of what I thought would be best.”

“Do you regret anything?” Thomas asked.

“I think we all have regrets but right now I try not to think about them too much.”

“When did you get so wise?” Thomas nudged his friend playfully, making him smile.

“I had some growing up to do recently and I think that might have sped up the process.” 

“Dante is very lucky to have you.” 

“I am the lucky one. And Thom, I am sure you and Tom will figure it out. I am sure there will be a happy end for us all.” 

“A happy end?” Thomas looked confused.

“Yes.”

“But I don’t want it to end. I want it to go on. I want a happy continuation. I don’t want the story to end.”

“When did you turn into a poet?” Damiano smiled and at that moment his phone lit up with a text from Eli.

“I ate and I’ll spend some time with Tom after work. Are you okay? Do you need anything?” 

“I miss you and I can’t wait to hug you.” Damiano typed back.

“I miss you too. Send my love to everyone and I’ll see you soon.”

“Say hi to Tom and text me if you need anything.”

“I will, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He looked away from the phone and saw that Thomas had joined the others in the kitchen, Vic trying to re-braid Ethan’s hair, Thomas trying (and failing) to give directions. It felt cosy. He took a picture of them before starting to get out the ingredients for dinner.

“You don’t have to be a dad tonight.” Victoria told him from the sofa, her fingers still tangled in Ethan’s hair.

“I am a dad always, Vic.” Damiano chuckled.

“Yes, but you don’t have to make our dinner and then tuck us in bed.” Thomas added.

“Can we have a sleepover,  though?” Vic added.

“Of course, my house is your house.” Damiano immediately replied.

“Let’s go out for dinner before Vic gives me a bald spot.” 

“I will not.” She insisted and focused on fixing the braid.

“We’ll go out for dinner and we can come back and have the sleepover.” Damiano smiled.

“What about Eli?” Ethan asked.

“They said they’ll spend time with Tom after work. I will probably see them tomorrow if they don’t come home in the middle of the night.” Damiano smiled.

Thomas didn’t say anything.

“No sulking for Tom tonight, please.” Vic called him out immediately. 

“I am not sulking.”

“No one is sulking tonight.” Vic looked at the three men.

“Of course, of course.” 

**

Damiano texted Eli about the change of plans and after a quick wardrobe change, made it outside with his friends. Ethan called their favourite restaurant to book a table and Damiano called Leo to invite him to dinner too. 

The atmosphere at the restaurant was cosy and familiar, giving the four of them a feeling of grounding.

“Did you miss us all so much, Vic?” Leo teased.

“Of course I did. We have been together non-stop for months.”

“It’s weird to not be constantly on the road.” Ethan added.

“It’s a nice change of pace.” Damiano said while looking at the menu.

“Of course, you love it, you homebody.” Vic chuckled.

“I missed it. I missed the stillness and I already have ideas for the new album, whenever that comes.”

“Have you written anything?” Leo looked at him.

“No, just some ideas in the notes app. Nothing more. I need to recharge, to give Dante some sense of normalcy, to spend some time with Eli. I am sure the writing will come naturally.”

“Is everything okay with you two?” Leo asked.

“Yes, Eli is just very busy.”

“You should plan a staycation for you two.”

“I am already on it.” 

“Do any of you have solid plans for anything during this time off?” Leo asked after they had ordered their dinner.

“Lots and lots of family time for me.” Damiano spoke first.

“Maybe some travelling, lots of reading for me.” Ethan added.

“I don’t know.” Thomas said quietly. 

“I just want to figure things out. Figure me out.” Vic shrugged. Thomas threw his arm around her shoulder and pressed a kiss to her hair.

“We’ll be there for you.”

“You better, I love you all too much.” Vic admitted.

“Count on us.” Ethan smiled at Vic but his smile quickly died on his lips as he looked to the person behind Vic. Damiano turned around and froze when he saw who was standing there. 

“Can we speak?” Y/N’s mother stood there.

“I have nothing to say.” Damiano stood up. 

“I have some things to say, please.” The older woman pleaded.

“If you’ve come to make some excuse or other for the way you and your daughter ghosted, please don’t.” Damiano looked at her.

“I have not. I bring something for you to give to Dante when he grows up. Something from her and me.”

“Why?” He looked at her again, his attention finally catching on the detail that she was wearing all black.

“I made a lot of mistakes in the past years, starting with the fact that I allowed her to take him away from you. That I stood by her and wronged both you and Dante. But she was my daughter.”

No one spoke a word and Damiano noted the tremble in her hands.

“What happened? Is Y/N okay?” Vic finally broke the silence.

The woman did not respond but handed Damiano a sealed envelope.

“I am sorry for everything, Damiano. I am sorry for all the harm I’ve caused. The time I had with Dante was some of the best in my life and I will always regret the harm that was caused.” 

Damiano did not know what to say. He held the envelope, recognizing the handwriting.

The woman didn’t say anything else as she left the restaurant and he sat back down at the table.

“Do you think she might be dead?” Leo asked.

“Are you going to open the envelope?” Thomas added.

“Maybe and yes.” Damiano managed after a little while.

“Do you want us to call Eli?” Ethan offered.

“No. Eli has enough on their plate, I will tell them when they come home, when I’ve had some time to process whatever curveball Y/N is throwing at me.” 

“Please drink some water.” Leo passed him the glass which Damiano gratefully took.

Damiano did. The waiter brought over the food.

“Do you want to open it?” Thomas asked quietly, referring to the envelope.

“No, not right now. I want to have dinner and sleepover with you.”

“That’s what we are doing then.” Leo smiled.

“You’re not alone and neither is Dante, it will be okay.” Ethan reassured him.

“Thank you.”

**

Eli needed twin time. The chaos of everyday life, the new dynamics and routines that they were putting themselves in were all great but one thing was non-negotiable and that was time with Tom.

They wrapped their arms around Tom, needing the heartbeat of calm before being engulfed in chaos again.

“Hey you.” Tom held them and smiled.

“Hi.” Eli said as some of the tiredness left their body instantly.

“I missed you too.” Tom pressed a kiss to Eli’s temple, making them smile.

“So much.” Eli affirmed, clinging to Tom.

“Is Damiano upset that I am stealing you from him tonight?”

“No, he has plans with the band and he knows I miss you.”

Tom didn’t say anything, instead kissed Eli’s temple again and opened the passenger door for them.

“I’m driving only because you look exhausted.”

“Fine, this time only.” Eli took out their phone and sat in the car, checking the notifications.

“I know you are out with Tom tonight but please come home later and don’t go to your apartment. I need you.” 

“Are you okay?” Eli was already worried.

“Yes, I just don’t want to sleep without holding you.”

“I’ll be there.” 

“Everything alright?” Tom started the car.

“Yes, Dami asked me to go home and not to my apartment.” Eli half-smiled.

“I am really happy that you two are figuring it out. It’s nice to see you this happy.” 

“It feels a bit surreal at times.” Eli admitted.

“You pined for a very long time, of course it feels surreal.” Tom joked.

“It was never the right time and we are trying to make sure that the right time is now because it’s definitely the right person.” 

“I can relate.” Tom nodded vaguely.

“What’s going on between you and Thomas?”

“Just some very long conversations that lead nowhere and we both get frustrated and that’s about it.” 

“How can I help?”

“I just need some time with you. Some time spent without thinking about how much my heart hurts, without the longing about a person who is right there and who i am not sure can ever love me the way I need him to love me.” 

Eli squeezed Tom’s hand.

“Even if it’s not with him, you’ll find happiness. I am sure of it.”

“The only thing I am sure of is that I am sick of feeling like this.” 

**

Everyone was fast asleep earlier than Damiano thought they would be. Vic snuggled up between Ethan and Thomas in the guest bedroom, Leo choosing to go home but promising to bring breakfast in the morning, leaving Damiano alone with his thoughts and the envelope left on the table.

He lit a cigarette. 

Then another.

Eventually the lock clicked and he heard Eli’s soft footsteps.

“Hi.” Eli wrapped their arms around him, noticing the ashtray full of cigs and his stiff posture.

“Hi.” He kissed their hand. 

“What’s this?” Eli pointed at the envelope. 

“I am not sure, but I didn’t want to open it without you here.” 

Eli put down their bag, washed their hands and then took a seat on Damiano’s lap.

“What happened? Why didn’t you text me about it?” 

“We were out for dinner and we saw Y/N’s mom. I didn’t text you about it because I compartmentalised the information and tried to have a good dinner with the gang and just ignored the fact that Y/N sent Gods know what.” 

Eli felt frustrated, but they also understood why he acted the way he had.

“Do you want to open it?”

“Yes, but I am also afraid.”

“You’re not alone. I won’t leave you.”  Eli promised.

--

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[writingmaneskin]

Home is Where the Heart is - A Damiano David Story || Chapter Twenty Nine

Pairings: Damiano David x OC

Description: Learning how to love again, how to heal and that it’s okay to move on and rebuild yourself after dealing with so much pain.

Words: 2.3k

Warnings: a blast from the past?

A/N: 👀

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“You look tenser than usual. Tenser than you have been lately.” Vic told Dami as she kept him company while he was having his coffee.

“I am not exactly excited to go back to Paris given everything that’s happened.” 

“You weren’t alone the first time, you are not alone now.” Vic tried to be reassuring.

“I know that, Vic but that doesn’t mean I particularly look forward to re-visiting Paris.” 

“Leo said that he tried to avoid it but we couldn't.”

“Which is why I’ve braced myself to the best of my ability.” 

“Listen, if we see her, I won’t be held responsible for my fist meeting her face.”

Dami smiled at Vic’s threat. He really hoped there wouldn’t be any surprise encounters.

**

Eli tried to focus to the best of their abilities on the job that they were doing. External factors like Dami and Dante travelling, Tom shutting them out and Auri’s living situation were stressors that they didn’t enjoy at all but there was only so much that they could control.

“I think you should go home early today.” Angie suggested, as Eli checked their phone for the millionth time. Damiano, Dante and the others were going to land any minute in Paris and Eli was waiting to hear from Dami and to know that everything went smoothly.

“Why?” Eli locked the phone and looked at Angie.

“Because your mind is elsewhere and we already went through the more important things, I can handle the rest.” 

“Angie, I don’t have much else to do.”

“You can take some time to decompress so you’d be back on track on Monday.”

“Are you sure?” 

“Never been surer. I will call you if something happens.” Angie reassured them.

Eli reluctantly packed their things and headed home, still waiting for the text from Damiano. There were a few unopened texts from Auri that they intended to get to as soon as they were home so they could focus on that response.

What Eli didn’t expect, was to find Tom home asleep on the sofa.

Their little brother looked peaceful and even though his rejection hurt, Eli still wanted the best for him while “they were minding their own business.”

They headed towards the bedroom and changed quickly into comfier clothes, putting on one of the hoodies they’d stolen from Dami just to feel a bit closer to him.

They checked the phone again, texting Dami now that they’d seen that the plane had landed to see if everything was alright. They hated Paris just as much as he did and the fact that they couldn’t support him and be there for him made their anxiety that much worse.

“You came home early.” Tom said, opening the door to the bedroom. 

“I’m minding my own business, as you requested.” Eli managed to say, making Tom flinch.

“Eli…”

“I did as you wanted, what do you want now, little brother?”

“I don’t want this to ruin our relationship.”

“Being rejected by you hurts like hell.” 

“Eli, I just need space to sort myself out.”

“I’ve given you everything you wanted, Tom. You can’t complain about that.”

“Eli, please. I just need to organise my life.”

“How am I in your way, Tom?”

“You are not, I just… I’m sorry for this mess.”

“Do you think one sorry will cover it?”

“No.”

“I’ve seen more of you when you were living in another country, Tom. I simply wanted to know what’s going on. You are acting like you did years ago and I’m worried for your well-being. I want my little brother to be okay because I love you and I care. If I didn’t, you wouldn’t be living under my roof.”

“Do you want me to go?”

“No, jackass. I want to help you but you clearly don’t want my help.”

Tom was quiet for a moment before stepping into the bedroom and taking a seat next to Eli.

“It’s about Thomas.” Tom confessed.

“I figured.”

“I’m scared.” 

“I know.” Eli took their brother’s hand.

He rested his head on their shoulder.

“I love him.” 

“I know.” 

“I don’t know about his feelings.” 

“You can’t know unless you talk to him.”

“I’m scared.” 

“It will be okay.” 

**

The travel time to Paris from London felt longer than it should have. Even with everything going smoothly, Damiano was getting tenser by the minute and he really did not want to deal with anyone there.

When they got to the hotel, he changed Dante into comfier clothes and gave him toys to keep him entertained as he headed towards the window for a smoke.

So much had changed since the last time he’d been in a hotel with Dante in Paris. There was so much to be grateful for but still, the flashbacks were pressing on him, making it more difficult to breathe.

He unlocked his phone and smiled at the picture of Eli and Dante gracing his screen.

“We made it to the hotel.” He texted Eli.

“Are you okay?” The response was almost instant.

“As okay as I can be. I feel a bit anxious but I can’t do anything about it. I just hate Paris.”

“I hate it too.” 

“Are you okay?” 

“I had a heart-to-heart with Tom.”

“How did it go?” 

“Angie sent me home early so he was asleep when I came home. We spoke a little bit.” 

“And?”

“I can’t tell you much because Tom wants to keep it private but I think it will all eventually be sorted.”

“Good.”

“Are you okay?” Eli couldn’t not ask.

“A bit triggered but I am trying to keep it together.”

“Good, I miss you.”

“I miss you too.”

“And I’m one call away.” 

“I know, my love.”

The pair texted for a little while longer before it was time for Damiano and the others to start getting ready for a soundcheck and a performance. 

“You won’t let him out of your sight, yes?” Damiano asked his mother for the millionth time. Dante was peacefully sleeping in his mobile crib, unbothered by his father’s anxiety.

“Yes, bambino. I will be with him, don’t worry.” 

“And if you go out, you’ll call?”

“Yes, and we will have security with us if we go out.”

“Good.”

“I love you, have a good day.” She kissed his cheek and then Dami kissed hers before leaning over the crib and kissing Dante’s forehead and whispering to him how loved he is.

**

He did his best to not show his anxiety or tension, or let it get in the way of his job. Still, he felt quite uneasy to be in Paris after everything.

“Do you want to go clubbing with us?” Vic asked Dami as they were leaving their performance.

“No, I want to go home to Dante. I’ll pick up dinner and just head back to the hotel.” 

“Do you want company?” Ethan offered. 

“Yes.” Damiano felt relieved at the offer. 

“I thought you were coming with us.” Thomas looked at Ethan.

“Not in the mood to party.” Ethan shrugged. 

“But in a reading mood.” Vic teased. “Did your author post again?”

“No, they haven’t and anyway, I still prefer a quiet evening.” 

“Well, I’ll accompany Vic and Thomas out, you two do your thing.” Leo finally added.

“And we’ll see each other in the morning.” Dami nodded and got in the first car with Ethan.

“Text us if you need anything.” Leo told him before closing the door after Ethan also got in the car.

The silence between the two friends was always comfortable. Damiano scrolled on his phone as Ethan drummed on the side of the door. When he’d gone through all his notifications, Dami locked the phone and looked at his friend.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“About what?”

“Your author?” Dami offered. To his surprise, there was a faint blush on Ethan’s face.

“Not right now, but thank you.” 

“Of course, buddy. I know I’ve been all wrapped up in my own world but I care about you and what’s going on.” 

“I know you do. It’s just… nothing big has happened yet, but I feel that eventually it will.”

Damiano was confused.

“I hope that whatever that big thing is, it works out for you.”

“I hope so too.”

The car pulled up in front of a restaurant that the band had gone to every time they’d visited Paris. Since their French sucked, they decided to go in themselves, order and pay, and wait for the food to be prepared. 

Once everything was paid for, Dami and Ethan stood outside the restaurant, next to the car and lit cigarettes.

“Is the author someone we might know?” Dami tried again.

Ethan didn’t have time to reply as a familiar voice got to them. A voice that made Damiano’s stomach sink.

“Ethan? Is that you?” 

“Hello.” Ethan’s voice was more respectful than anything Dami could have managed. Standing in front of them was the person that had given birth to Dante. Someone he’d hoped he’d never have to deal with again.

“Damiano.” She managed finally.

“Y/N.” He got out.

“Where is he?” 

“That’s none of your business.”

She didn’t say anything but looked at Ethan instead, as if the sight of Dami was too much to bear.

“Is Dante okay?” She asked Ethan.

Ethan looked at her.

“You gave up the right to know anything about him, Y/N.” Damiano spoke before Ethan could. 

“I went through a lot.” 

“So did I, but the difference between us is that I never abandoned Dante.”

She flinched as if his words had landed a blow.

“I think it’s best that you go on your way.” Ethan suggested to her.

“Give him my best.” Y/N once again looked at Ethan.

“Your best is given with you being thousands of miles away from him, don’t worry.” Dami spoke to her, his anger bubbling to the surface. 

The two watched as the woman walked away and Damiano sat on the sidewalk. 

“Are you okay?” Ethan asked his friend.

“As okay as I can be. I need to get the fuck away from Paris.” 

“We’ll be out by this time tomorrow.” Ethan reassured him.

“That wouldn’t be soon enough.” 

The food was brought to them and the pair got in the car, Dami resting his forehead against the glass, trying to calm down so he wouldn’t freak anyone out and that he wouldn’t freak out. But she’d been there, asking questions about his son, having the audacity after everything.

“I saw Y/N.” He texted Eli.

“Are you okay?” 

“I am annoyed by her audacity. She asked about Dante.”

**

Eli walked out to the living room where Tom was watching TV.

"Pack a bag." 

"What? Why?"

"We are going to Paris." Eli replied before going back into their room to change and put their things together.

"Do we have tickets?" Tom asked as he scrambled to put his backpack together.

"I just bought us tickets."

"Do they know?"

"Leo knows. He's sending a car to pick us up at the airport, we need to go." Eli urged and closed their bag after throwing in some essentials and their wallet and laptop.

Tom was ready a few minutes after them, wearing a pair of jeans and a hoodie.

"I'm tagging along because of you." 

"If you say so." Eli said, unconvinced.

"Why are we going to Paris? Did something happen?"

"Y/N happened again." Eli locked up the apartment and headed outside.

"Fucking hell."

The twins got in the taxi that Eli had ordered, their bags sitting between them.

“Do you want to tell me more about you and Thom?” Eli tried to get their twin to talk.

Tom considered it for a moment, the pressure and anxiety within him ready to burst.

“I do but there is not much to say except that we talk a lot and I don’t know where that will lead us.”

“I gather you haven’t told him how you feel.”

“Not yet, no. Still considering it.” Tom admitted.

“As a person who stood on the sidelines and watched the love of their life be with other people for over a decade, I’d advise you to not waste time and go for it, as scary as it is. Even if you get rejected, you would have tried and you’d be able to move on.”

“Thank you.” Tom reached to hold Eli’s hand.

**

Dami didn’t hear from Eli for a portion of the later afternoon and early evening. His mind often wandered to them, yet he knew that they would text if anything was up - they needed time to catch up on rest and to talk to Tom, and he wasn’t going to disturb that.

Having said goodnight to his mama and put Dante to sleep, Damiano headed to bed himself, determined to catch up on some rest as well, when his phone vibrated.

“I sent you something, could you please check in front of the door, if they delivered it yet?” Eli had written.

Damiano got out of bed and walked to the door, thinking what it could be that Eli had sent.

Eli stood there, a big smile on their face as Damiano’s surprise and awe greeted them.

He rubbed his eyes, disbelief and excitement flooding him all at the same time before he swept Eli off their feet and started kissing them.

“You’re here.” The man kept repeating, as if a prayer had been answered.

“I’m here.” Eli reassured, kissing him back. 

[writingmaneskin]

Home is Where the Heart is - A Damiano David Story || Chapter Twenty Eight

Pairings: Damiano David x OC

Description: Learning how to love again, how to heal and that it’s okay to move on and rebuild yourself after dealing with so much pain.

Slight angst, smut implications, lots of fluff

Words: 2.5k

A/N: This is more and more fun to write, I hope you're enjoying too ✨And I'm working on more projects for both blogs so stay tuned for that ✨

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Travelling was part of the job - that was something that he’d always known.

Having the knowledge versus facing the feelings that came with homesickness were not the same thing.

He liked travelling and exploring new places with his friends, and now being able to travel with Dante made a world of a difference.

It was time to do the usual quick European tour promo - England, Germany, Belgium and France before going back to Italy through Milan and finally going home to Rome. The schedule was made for about ten days - not too long, not too much travel, barely any jet lag.

Dante was packed and ready to go, yet Damiano was anxious and reluctant to go. 

“What’s wrong?” Eli had gone over that afternoon of the day before the boys left to see them and spend some time with them.

The two sat down on the sofa and Dami rested his head on their lap which prompted Eli to run their fingers through his hair - something that instantly soothed both of them.

“I’ll miss you.” He admitted.

“I will miss you too.” Eli traced his nose very gently before booping it.

The gesture made him smile.

“I will be one phone call away.” Eli reassured him.

“Yes, but it’s ten days.” 

“Ten days during which we’ll both be so busy that they will fly by.” 

“Ten days without you.” He kissed their hand.

“Ten days without my boys, yes.” Eli wrapped a finger around one of his curls gently. 

“I wish you could have come with us.”  Dami told them simply, lacing his fingers with theirs. 

“ I will be with you in spirit,” Eli promised. “And you better send me all the updates.” 

**

Dante was the happiest baby at the airport, the lights and noises keeping him entertained rather than agitated and he played with his toys, babbling away in the stroller as they all went through security. 

The sight of the child’s happiness made Dami’s anxiety go away almost completely even if temporarily. 

“He’s grown so much.” Ethan pointed out as they were sitting waiting for boarding time.

“I know, I can’t believe it.” Dami didn’t move his gaze from Dante even as he spoke to his friend.

“He’s not the only one that’s grown, though.” 

“What do you mean?” Ethan’s words made Dami turn to him for a second.

Dante, who was enjoying the attention, saw that his papa averted his gaze and fussed slightly, earning a chuckle from the two men.

“You’ve grown too, Dami.” Ethan spoke calmly.

His friend’s words made him think - so much had changed in such a short amount of time that he’d put off sorting through most of his feelings and emotions and focused on doing what needed to be done. That was something that he’d started working on in therapy for the sake of himself and their futures.

“I hope so.” Damiano offered after a moment.

“You have. You became a dad almost instantly after you met Dante, even in the scary moments you didn’t leave him for a second, and at your most vulnerable you opened your heart and were vulnerable and admitted that you’ve had feelings for your best friend for a long time and now the two of you are building your relationship. I am happy to watch it all happen for you.” 

The mention of Eli made him smile.

“You’re smiling a lot more nowadays too.” Vic added to their conversation as she sat down on the floor in front of Dante’s stroller and started playing with him. 

“Yes, and while you’re still a bit chaotic, you’re also much calmer now.” Thomas added too. 

“Well, he is still a mess but he is our mess.” Leo finally chimed in, making Dami laugh.

**

“We just landed and we are waiting for the car to take us to the hotel.” Dami texted Eli as soon as they were through security and he’d gotten their things. 

“Good, how was the flight?” Eli replied swiftly.

“It was okay, Dante watched Moana with Thomas and I took a nap.” 

“I am glad you slept, amore.”

“How is your day going?” 

“It’s busy but I snuck out for a cigarette break as soon as you texted.” 

“When is Tom arriving?” 

“I am picking him up at 6 and then we have dinner with the parents and he is sleeping over tonight.” 

“Give him a hello from me.” 

“I will. Send me all the pictures, I miss my boys already.” 

Dami smiled at the last text and leaned over the stroller then whispered to Dante to send kisses to the camera and took a picture of that - the two of them making kissy faces, to send to Eli.

Eli replied with that picture as their wallpaper.

“You’re adorable.” 

“We miss you too.” 

**

“You’re all smiles.” That was the first thing that Tom told them when he got out of the airport. Eli wrapped their arms around him and squeezed tight, having missed their twin for too long.

“Well, you’re back, finally and for good. How can I not be smiling?” 

“I missed you too.” Tom kissed their forehead before carrying his bags to the car. 

“How was the flight?” Eli asked as they got in the car.

“Boring, I finished my book and then Auri made me cry with a draft she sent and then I landed looking all puffy.” 

“You look fine.” Eli reassured him, chuckling.

“Yes, because it’s me but I still feel puffy.” Tom chuckled too.

“Have you spoken to Thomas?” Eli asked.

“Not really, not since the show.” 

“Did you two fight?” 

“No, why would we fight?” 

“Well, why don’t you two speak then?” 

Tom fidgeted with his ring.

“I guess there is almost always too much left unsaid between us to keep going. We always speak half truths and half lies, I think and then each of us finds his own way and life goes on.”

“Yet you still came back to Rome.”

Tom sighed.

“I can’t be away from you for long, and I have a nephew now. Plus, hopefully Auri is going to move here too and I don’t want to experience feeling left out between my people being in the same city and me living thousands of kilometres away.” 

“Sure, if you say so.” Eli half-smiled and kept driving.

“How is it going with you and Dami?” Tom asked in turn.

“Slow and steady wins the race.” 

“Meaning what?”

“Meaning that we are finding out how to be partners besides being best friends.”

“And?”

“It’s amazing. I love him and he knows that and he loves me and sometimes it’s a struggle to go to bed because we keep talking well into the night and then we are both dead the next day but it’s amazing because those are our moments with the insane schedules that we now have.”

“Just talking?” Tom gave them a sideways glance, earning a blush from Eli.

“Mind your business.” 

“Good for you.” Tom chuckled.

**

There was nothing interesting or unusual that the interviewers asked every time - thoughts about the new album, release dates, what they are working on. Some tried to sneak in questions about their private lives but those questions were always cut short or given very vague answers. 

While Dami was working, his own mother was taking care of Dante. Damiano, of course, had offered to take the babysitter only for his mother to cut him off and explain that spending more time with two of her favourite boys while also travelling was a welcome perk.

“How was he?” Dami picked the little boy from the crib and gave him a cuddle, only to be met with enthusiastic slobbery kisses that made him chuckle.

“He was an angel, as usual.” His mother praised Dante. “Did you manage to eat?”

“Not yet, but I will order room service. I am too tired to go to long dinners.” 

“When will you slow down?”

“Hopefully soon. We still have some work to do but Leo said that time off is coming up.” 

“Knowing you, that time off won’t do much besides make you restless in one place.”

“I have things to do, mama.” Dami insisted. “I need to work on myself, work on new music, figure out things with Eli.”

“Figure out what with Eli?” 

“How to be their partner. How to be a good parent.” 

“You already are their partner and you are a wonderful dad, Dami.” His mother caressed his cheek. “You put too much stress on yourself and demand so much from one single person when you would never demand anything of such high standard from anyone else.”

“Mama, it’s not just anyone. Eli deserves the best, so does Dante.”

“Yes, and so do you. And running yourself in the ground will not do anyone any good, Dami. I support your decision to slow down but you truly need to slow down. You know how people say that if you don’t slow down, your body slows down for you. Imagine if that happens. What will Dante and Eli do?” 

Dami shivered at the thought and pressed Dante closer to himself.

“Exactly.” His mother affirmed. 

“I get your point, mama. I will try my best to slow down and take some breaths and be … less chaotic.”

“That’s all anyone can ask from you - that you try your best.” 

**

Eli didn’t like the way they felt - there was too much chaos and uncertainty which only meant that their anxiety was spiking. Out of everything in their world, the only thing that was certainly working as planned was the film that they were working on. The production was going smoothly and they were on schedule, meaning that they weren’t stressing too much over what was going to happen next in the work life.

Living with Tom again was something that they realised they deeply missed. It was one thing to be one phone call away and an entirely different thing to have our twin within the same city limits. Although living would hardly describe it - Tom was almost always busy, sleeping for a few hours, often while Eli was also asleep and barely picking up his phone when he was working. 

“When am I going to see you?” Eli texted him during their cigarette break.

“I am home right now.” 

“And I am at work.” 

“When are you getting home?” 

“Around 8, if I am lucky.” 

“I will be out by then. Do you want to come for some dancing?”

“No. I have to be up at dawn tomorrow.” 

“Too bad. We are going out dancing.”

“Who is we?” 

“Some friends and I.” 

“I am worried about you.”

“Why are you worried about me?’

“Because I feel like I am missing some vital information that would explain why you are acting like you are back in college, partying away your days.” 

“You are not missing anything. I am just living my best life. I found an apartment that I am considering getting.”

“Oh. Where is it?”

“That’s the not nice part - it’s the building next to Thomas’.” 

“Why is it not nice?”

“You know why.”

“No, I don’t.” 

“Anyway. I might not end up getting it.” 

“You love that man and I think he definitely has some feelings for you and I think it’s time you speak your truths and find out.” 

“I didn’t pressure you about your relationship, Eli. Please, let me figure things out on my own.” 

“Fine.” 

Frustrated by this chaos, Eli left the chat with their twin and opened the one with Dami.

“How is today going for you?” 

The reply came swiftly.

“Lousy. I miss you.” 

“I miss you too. How is Dante?”

“He is thriving, mama is spoiling him as usual and he is having lots of fun with travelling which is a relief.” 

“Why is your day lousy?” 

“Because mama and I had a talk and I know she has a point but it’s difficult to admit that she has one, even to myself. How is your day going?”

“Lousy. I miss you and there is too much chaos and I can’t make much sense of it.” 

“How can I help?” Dami’s answer made Eli smile.

“You already do. You are the certain thing in this whole chaos.” 

“What happened?” 

“Tom is acting off, Auri is really slow with her replies and the whole thing is stressing me out. Tom keeps avoiding me and he said that he found an apartment but he might not get it due to how close it is to Thomas’ place.” 

“Ouch. Thom wouldn’t like that. He mentioned Tom in passing and asked if Tom is okay because he hasn’t been replying to his texts.” 

“Well, I don’t know what’s happening between them but I told my brother to try and figure it out.” 

“And?”

“He told me to mind my own business.” 

“I’ll be with you in less than a week and I’ll give you the biggest tightest hug. I’m sorry I can’t do much more. Do you want me to talk to Tom?”

“I doubt that he will listen.” 

“I’ll still try.”

“I look forward to that tight hug.” 

“I do too.” 

**

Figuring out how to make a relationship work and build a family was not easy when you were constantly surrounded by chaos.

It all felt too much at times.

Eli wanted the best for the family they were trying to build. Damiano, on the other hand, was struggling with trying to accept that nothing would ever be perfect and was trying hard to shift his focus to healing and getting better for everyone’s sake.

He picked up the phone that evening and called Eli’s number.

“Ciao, tesoro.” Their melodic voice made his entire being smile.

“Ciao, amore. How are you?” He needed to hear their voice. He needed more than that but hearing them was the closest he could get at that moment.

“I’m tired and I just finished a meeting. How are you?” 

“Tired, mama is taking care of Dante’s dinner right now.” Dami lit a cigarette on the balcony.

“Have you eaten?” Eli asked.

“Not yet, have you?” 

“Not yet but I got dinner on the way home.”

“Good. I miss you.” 

“I miss you too.” Eli unlocked their apartment and started putting things away while holding the phone to their ear.

“I had a dream about you last night.” 

“Was it a naughty one?” Eli tried to lighten up the mood.

Dami smiled.

“It was not that kind of dream, I’m afraid.” 

“What was it then?”

“I saw us old and wrinkly and happily married, and Dante was there too.” 

Eli’s heart skipped a beat. Being married to Dami was something they’d always dreamt for themselves.

“And do you think it was a prophetic dream?”

“I certainly hope so.” 

“It’s my dream too.” Eli admitted.

Dami’s heart skipped a beat. He imagined the life he and Eli, and Dante would have, and that future made him overwhelmingly happy.

[ykaaaras]

The Preacher: Chapter 1

Pairing: DAMIANO DAVID x fictional female insert

Chapter summary: After badly incident, Damiano helps Medusa to remember what had happened.

Content: angst, hurt/comfort, priest Damiano David, supernatural, mention of religion, mention of possession, a little bit of fluff, anxiety, fear, hospital

Word count: 6.2k

Warnings: mention of suicide, mention of homicide

Medusa woke up in pain. Her legs felt numb and her half-open eyes were flickering painful bright light flashes. She couldn’t remember what had happened. Medusa tried to move. The pain just got even more intense and Medusa decided to stay in her position and wait till someone found her. On the other hand, she knew that she must get up because otherwise, she could be found by someone she wouldn’t expect to be found by. She couldn’t recall why she was laying here. Did someone try to kill her? Or maybe she tried to kill herself? Medusa released a quiet sigh full of pain. It was hard to even open her eyes fully. However, she had to find out where she was laying.

When she opened her eyes, the view didn’t focus immediately. But soon she realized that she was laying on cement paving. Somewhere above her head prevailed big noise. Far away on the horizon, she could see the rows of apartment buildings. Also, Medusa comprehended that she layed near water. Because of her perception of where she was Medusa felt cold and she started to shiver. She still couldn’t move her legs. She wanted to shout, but it would probably be hopeless and even impossible. Her mouth was locked. Someone should take her from here.

Finally, Medusa slowly and sorrowfully began to roll on her back. When she succeeded, above her she didn’t see the sky, but the hood of steal, which covered whole her eyesight. Medusa snored another sigh. What if her bones are broken, was the first thought after she got a little bit conscious. The pain was unbearable for real. She tried to kill herself, she remembered finally, and she got too scared. She didn’t succeed? Or maybe she was in hell? Suddenly she heard steps approaching, the sound of shoes clapping on the paving, while they were getting closer to her. Medusa got scared and closed her eyes, she wanted to let whatever that was think that she was dead. Her wish to be found suddenly disappeared. She was worrying that it wasn't the help that was coming. To be honest, she understood that she was rather dead.

The footsteps approached even more. Medusa put all the strength into herself and her body so she wouldn’t move, pant, or breathe even though it was very hard. The sleeve of her yellow hoodie was bloody and she couldn’t pay attention anywhere else. Blood, that means something was broken. But it would be stupid to hope that she’s whole, she fell from the bridge it was weird that she was alive in general. Someone stood beside her. Medusa got deadly scared. She felt that there were three men and a girl. Medusa tried to convince herself that she never met any of them, but deep inside she felt like she knew them from somewhere. They observed Medusa for some time. Then the girl leaned in front of Medusa, but she didn’t squat, just stood.

“You think she’s alive?” asked her. 

It prevailed a little, short silence among them. They were watching every shudder of Medusa, and she wondered how obvious that she was alive.

“I don’t know. Check it,” answered one of the men.

“Isn’t it obvious, can’t you see that she’s breathing?” the man who said it seemed quite perspicacious, or Medusa just couldn’t hide well enough. “Check her pulse, Victoria.”

Victoria squatted down and put two of her fingers on Medusa’s neck near her jawline. Feeling cold Victoria’s fingers Medusa flinched unwillingly. She felt how Victoria smiles.

“Alive,” informed and stood up.

Victoria — thought Medusa — a name so heard and voice very not of the stranger. Who was she? And what they intended to do to Medusa? Now there’s no point in pretending. She loudly moaned with fear and pain. Couldn't speak. When she tried to say something, she just felt that she gargled with blood. She hardly opened her eyes again and began to look around. At first, she was scared to turn her eyes to strangers. But when she dared, her eyes expanded even though it was painful. She saw them somewhere for real. But where the fuck? There was a man with long, black hair, the other was tall and blond, Victoria, and then it seemed there was... a priest? He wore a white collar that is worn by priests and he had a little pendant with a cross on his neck. Medusa frowned as much as her strength let. He seemed probably the most seen of all of them. And his smile with dimples on the cheeks looked intimate. Medusa didn’t get why he was smiling, she didn’t understand what they were talking about in general. She was in a strange trance, the only thing that she still cared about was what they were going to do to her. Suddenly, that priest came near her and squatted just like Victoria did before. He attentively looked at her face, then to her eyes and Medusa shut them, she felt a little bit uncomfortable.

“You don’t remember me?” he asked gently. Medusa shook her head a little bit. The priest sighed. “She needs to be taken to the hospital,” he said to others. “Call the ambulance.”

Medusa could hear a phone signal somewhere, someone was talking about an injured girl. The longer Medusa layed the colder she got and the pain was jolting even harder, so she started to shiver more and more than before. She felt how dark haired man saw that she was cold and that she’s shaking uncontrollably. He came and took off his jacket. He lifted Medusa a little, it hurt so bad.

“Shhh…” he comforted her and wrapped her in his jacket. Medusa could feel the warmth and a pleasurable scent. Eventually, her teeth calmed down chattering. She heard the sirens.

While she was ferried into the ambulance car, she couldn’t stop moaning, and when she was moving her pain got a dozen times bigger. But finally, she was laid down and bright and almost painful lights started to flash into her eyes.

“I’m going with her,” said someone of the four. “Ethan, you can take my car.”

A few minutes passed and the priest came to the car. He sat near a paramedic in front of Medusa’s bunk. Medusa got surprised. Why him? She was wearing an oxygen mask on her face which helped her breathe. Medusa was so scared, but she felt that he was looking at her and she could not turn her gaze to him. His eyes were slightly brown and now he looked gentle and good-willing. If Medusa ever saw him, she remembers only dark and predatory ones, which probably weren’t inherent for a priest. Something was wrong. Something was so weird.

He leaned towards her. Medusa shivered with fear. She turned her head to the other side so she would avoid eye contact.

“Don’t be scared,” whispered him. “No one is going to hurt you anymore.”

Hurt? Medusa thought that she tried to kill herself. If someone did hurt her, then who? Medusa hadn’t turned her eyes on him yet. Even though she wanted to ask him what he was talking about, she didn’t dare, and to be honest she wasn’t even able, even if her body was about to relax bit by bit, her tongue was still locked. Everything she could do was shake her head and that’s what she did, started to gently shake her head. She was sure that he was smiling.

“Everything is fine,” said he leaning back. “Now you’re safe.”

Medusa moaned quietly, his voice so calming and for a moment she thought she was safe for real. Lights became brighter and Medusa hardly shut her eyes. She still tasted the blood in her mouth. They injected her with some kind of medicine, and probably Medusa was creating the danger herself, but she was afraid that she was poisoned, but how the fuck she could not trust the priest? It got hard to breathe under that mask and she couldn’t understand why... Shouldn’t it help to breathe instead? Medusa began to squirm, she wanted to jump out of the car, ran into the street, and she wanted to kill herself again, but this time she wanted to succeed. When the paramedic noticed her squirming, he tied her hands tighter to her bunk. She felt a prick in her side.

~~~

She couldn’t believe it. She woke up in the hospital, and the first thing she saw was the dropper on the side, above her head. The first thing she heard was noise in the hallway. The first thing she realized was that she was not alone in the ward. Medusa turned her heavy head. The four people who were with her under, probably, a bridge, were here. Victoria has worn a white robe, the priest was leaning on the windowsill, the tall one sat on a chair in front of the bed, and a man with long hair was also with a robe and standing near Victoria. Medusa couldn’t understand why they were there and what they want from her. Maybe she had made some kind of crime? When Victoria noticed that Medusa woke up, she came closer.

“Medusa,” her voice tone was gentle and friendly but also strict. “Can you speak?”

Medusa wanted to shake her head saying no, but then she realized that maybe she can… A little bit.

“I… I…” she took a deep breath. “Don’t… Know…”

“Hmm…” Victoria chuckled quietly. “Could you answer a few questions?”

How could she answer any question if she doesn’t remember anything? Everything she saw in front of her eyes was the top of that bridge and later that priest in the ambulance car where was flashing bright lights. Medusa turned her eyes to him. He leaned his head against the window and looked directly into her face, when their gazes met he smiled a little bit, and friendly and softly blinked with one of his eyes. Medusa felt herself blushing. She was curious if Victoria noticed it. It’d be very awkward.

Medusa nodded. Victoria smiled again.

“Well, first of all, do you remember what happened? Do you remember who are we?”

Medusa shook her head.

“No,” said as clearly as she could. It was too scary what can come back to the head.

“And maybe if you think a little?” lifted her eyebrow Victoria, but seeing how Medusa was ‘thinking’, she realized that the girl’s brain was probably deeply damaged. “It’s okay,” Victoria comforted her. “You’ll remember it eventually.”

Medusa sighed hard in disagreement.

“...Or we can introduce ourselves… Once again. Would it be acceptable for you?” asked Victoria.

Medusa squirmed in her bed. If she’d remember, maybe she’ll feel any better, maybe the headache she felt because of trying to recall anything, would quiet down.

“Okay,” mumbled she. “I… Think it’d be better."

Victoria nodded. She reviews all the people now in the ward and starts to name them.

“I am Victoria de Angelis, a psychiatrist,” she showed to the man near her. “This is therapist Ethan Torchio, the guy sitting next to you is medicine student Thomas Raggi, and there,” she waved her finger to the priest. “A priest and exorcist Damiano David. We work with any kind of people who in any way, psychologically, emotionally, or physically are or were experienced possession. Does it say something to you?”

Medusa’s temples got tense. It was hard to digest this much information. However, her head started to flash flashbacks. The bridge she fell from… Could it be related to exorcism? Now she realized that whatever reason she felt from that fucking bridge was, it wasn’t suicide. Something frightened her. Medusa shut her eyes, then opened them again. Suddenly, she remembered the pain right before the fall. The pain was tearing. Someone was screaming very loudly, probably, herself. And she remembered words, a lot of words, like prayers. Then she ran away from the building she was in before and fell, that was everything she remembered for now. Did that… Damiano was with her? Or maybe they all? Perhaps her memories were lying to her. Now she couldn’t know if she can trust even her own head. Medusa looked at Victoria, can she trust her? She couldn’t recall what these people were even if they introduced themselves to her. They could lie to her, they could hurt her if they wanted. Maybe they were possessed themselves. Although Medusa was thinking such things, she realized that she didn’t answer Victoria’s question.

“I don’t know,” when she speaks it gets hard to breathe and she could still taste the blood in her mouth. “Probably not.”

Victoria sighed quietly.

“I think she needs special treatment,” said her to Ethan and he nodded.

Hearing this Medusa got confused and liven up a bit, she squirmed heavily.

“What’s the special treatment?” she asked even though it was too hard to do it.

Victoria and Ethan both turned to Medusa.

“Nothing scary, darling,” Victoria consoled her. “It’s just that we are gonna meet you more often from now on, more often than ever, more often than we did the last time, to ensure you a fledged safety.”

“Where I am?” Medusa suddenly felt the itch to know where she was. She got the fact that she was at the hospital but didn’t think about which till now. She remembered that Victoria introduced herself as a psychiatrist, not like the ordinary doctor.

“‘Casa di Cura Samadi’ psychiatry hospital of Rome,” Victoria’s voice was so casual that Medusa actually calmed down a little, even though she found out that she was at the psych ward.

Then Medusa got another thought if she was here and can’t remember anything, she still perceived that she had a family. Mom, dad, and maybe even a sister. They weren’t here. Remembering them was way easier, even though it seemed that they were light-years away from her, hiding somewhere in the corners of her brain. She wanted to know where they are now and how long she didn’t see them.

“Where are my parents?” this question made her voice shudder because she understood that she was afraid of knowing the truth. She wanted to come back to normal life even if now she was only imagining that she has one.

She saw how all four looked at each other. Then all of their glances stick to Damiano as if he should explain everything to her.

“Your parents…” began saying him. “Are high up above us.”

“Damiano,” said Victoria a little bit angrily. “Just say it so she’d understand.”

Damiano rolled his eyes. As a priest, he was quite weird…

“They’re dead, Medusa. I’m sorry.”

Medusa frowned. If she was in a different situation, a different position, it would be really sorrowful to hear that, but now it was hard to grasp. She even didn’t wanna ask what had happened to them. She felt like the answer wouldn’t cheer her up. Her hands started to itch so she frightened and squeezed her fists. What if she has done something to her parents herself, indeed? Her eyes fearfully stuck to Damiano. It was he who told her that her parents are dead. It means he knows more. But even though the fear to hear something she wouldn’t like to hear was strong, however, she must know. It was her right.

“But… But… What happened?” she asked. “In… In general?” Because of the blood taste in her mouth, she felt nauseous.

It was a short silence in the ward. All eyes stuck to Damiano again. He probably knew what happened the best. He probably was there when it happened.

Damiano switched position, he sat on the windowsill.

“Should we tell her?” asked his colleagues.

At first, they just shrugged, then nodded. Damiano sighed, he looked Medusa in the eyes. Medusa was looking at him. Her eyes were wet.

“You were possessed,” he explained. “You and your friends arranged the show about the four horsemen of the apocalypse from biblical legend, you thought you were the Death,” he scratched the top of his head as if he knew that what he was about to say will be the most unpleasant part. “You killed your parents and from three of your friends, the only one left — your sister. She’s with us, we have her. Your friends were never possessed, all the time while you thought you were real Death, they were just playing… When the exorcism was performed on you, you succeed to run away from the building, but not for long, when you felt that the demon isn’t in you anymore, you felt empty and jumped off the bridge. That’s all, now you’re here,” he got silent and tilted his head so he could see Medusa’s reaction.

Medusa’s eyes were wide open, she sat just like she was frozen. Her eyes were even wetter, it looked like she was about to cry.

“It’s safe here,” added Damiano comforting. “There’s nothing in you anymore.”

“But…” stuttered Medusa. “I?... Did… Kill them.”

Damiano nodded.

“How?” asked Medusa again.

“It will be better if you wouldn’t know, sweetheart. I’ve told you a lot, it’s enough stress for this time.”

Victoria, Ethan, and Thomas who were listening, now moved a little bit. The nurse sneaked into the ward and turned the light on. It was getting dark outside. So many things started to spin in Medusa’s head. She has a sister but can’t remember even her name.

‘Sweetheart…’ Medusa thought. What kind of relationship she had with Damiano, besides that he was a priest? She felt him a quite warm feeling and attachment, even though she understood that only now. The feeling came unexpectedly, something in Damiano’s movements reminded her of that, but he just changed his legs' position from one to another and crossed his arms on his chest.

Medusa felt tired. Exhausted. She just woke up but her body wasn’t relaxed. But she was afraid to fall asleep, afraid because they could come back. Medusa was used to seeing chimeras in the city between corners of the churches and funny spirits from various epochs, she even used to give them names if they wouldn’t have them already. However, now everything didn’t seem so fun. Now she was scared of them. Damiano, psychiatrist Victoria, and her colleagues will leave now and she’ll be left alone with her horrors again. She didn’t wanna that Damiano leave.

“Well, I think it’s time for us to go,” said Victoria. “You, Medusa, should rest and sleep for real. In case of emergency, the nurse is waking in the hallway.”

Medusa shook her head. Victoria stopped surprised, but didn’t say anything. Damiano also stood as if he was thinking if he should leave or maybe stay. He really saw that Medusa wanted that he’d stay here with her. Finally, he probably decided to leave with others, but he was stopped by the voice of Medusa.

“Damiano,” she said quietly. “Could you stay?”

Damiano smiled gently.

“Well, maybe I can. For tonight,” answered him watching how Medusa calmed down a bit and her worrying facial expression turned into relaxed, and she squinted a little bit as if she’d want to sleep indeed. From her mouth escapes an unwilling yawn.

When they left, Damiano came near the bed and leaned onto the handhold. His sleeves were rolled up and Medusa could see his tattoos.

“So you wanna say something to me?” asked him still smiling.

Medusa lowered her eyes. She wanted to know everything and how it happened. But she didn’t know how she should ask him to tell her this. She wanted that Damiano would be here when she gets sleepy. She felt like he was the only of those people whom she can trust. Is it because he was a priest? Medusa was never this religious to crave the closeness of a priest. she even was afraid of the church, it's teaching, and God. But this man was different, he did something to her that made her want that he wouldn’t ever leave.

Damiano came around the bed and sat near Medusa. He knew exactly what she wanted to know and he knew every single answer, to what she cared about. But he didn’t intend to say anything anyway unless she ask it herself. Damiano guessed that many of those things can frighten her. He was interested can she still see the creatures and spirits that she saw before the exorcism. He squinted and ran his eyes around the corners of the ward.

“Are we alone?” inquired him smiling cunningly and seeing how Medusa die away a little. She didn’t understand what he has in mind, so she nodded cowardly.

“Why?” her iris were moving while she was looking at Damiano, they were full of fear and anxiety. “Someone else… Has to be here?” when she talked her voice was shivering, she didn’t want that someone would interfere between her and Damiano.

“I don’t know. You tell me.”

“I think there’s nobody here,” her heart was jumping, she felt like something should appear here or that she has to see something. Damiano noticed it and comforted her.

“It’s okay, Dussy, if you don’t see anything in the ward, it means there’s nothing here.”

His words calmed Medusa down. She released a silent sigh full of relief. Her gaze caught Damiano’s hand placed near her hip. She wanted to take it and squeeze it, so she lifted her palm slightly, hoping that Damiano will notice what she wants. She saw a mischievous smirk on his face when he took her palm himself. What a unique priest he was, the thought was flying through Medusa’s brain. When they were sitting in silence for a while, finally Medusa found enough courage in herself to ask:

“What happened to me?”

Damiano lifted his eyebrow.

“I thought I’ve told you what happened to you already.”

Medusa shook her head in disagreement. That what he said was too little for her to understand what happened in very truth. Damiano sighed but not pitiful more like with a little surprise. He considered what he should say.

“You don’t remember what life you lived before jumping off the bridge? Not even a little bit?”

“No,” silently admitted Medusa. “Just I somewhat remember you.”

Damiano’s eyes got wide open for a second.

“What do you remember about me?” asked him with pure curiosity in his voice.

Medusa shrugged. She recalled his aura, maybe a scent or a voice, just like others but way stronger. She remembered… Affection. Dependence. She couldn’t understand it herself.

“Just…”

Damiano chuckled quietly, so Medusa did the same. Her laugh cheered Damiano up and now to be honest he didn’t wanna tell her anything so he wouldn’t ruin her now little bit improved mood. Saw how Medusa slightly smiles, take a breath and lower her eyes. Then she got upset and stuck pleading glance to Damiano again.

“But why?... Did I jump off the bridge?”

Before everything, Medusa used to go to school. It should have been her last year, but on her eighteen birthday, she celebrated with a knife in her hand, against her parents’ and friends’ throats. Now Medusa was a little worried that she could go to jail, she was an adult when she did that after all. But the scariest was the fact that she really did that herself, it seemed even stupidly unreal, incomprehensible and so so sick. When she thought about it her hand starts to shake, and the nausea of the terror begins to pulse in her stomach. Even though she couldn’t perceive it yet, she knew that a few hours will pass and she will start to miss her parents and friends. She knew that she’ll be filled with self-loathing and she’ll start to regret she didn’t die while jumping off the bridge. Which, to be honest, was really very weird. How?

Damiano thought a little, it wasn’t easy to find words that could explain to a girl why she killed so many people.

“You’ve read a book. About four horsemen of the apocalypse, the book marked a deep impression in your brain, just like teenagers start to obsess with tv shows and, well, books as well. Instead of creating a blog on the internet and writing fan fictions, which would be quite weird, because the book was written in the past century, you’ve decided to recreate the plot in the form of a comedy,” Damiano watched Medusa’s reaction to this. She listened with lowered eyes. Damiano could only imagine how she feels. How fucking scared she had to be now. “It doesn’t say anything to you?”

Medusa shook her head once again. She couldn’t recall what kind of book it could be.

“What kind of book that was?”

Now Damiano shook his head a little bit, he slightly smiled and released a small giggle.

“I won’t tell you, because what if you’ll decide to read it again one day.”

“In the form of a comedy?” asked her. “What could that be?”

“Well, the game, small tricks with friends. To neighbors, classmates, family and etc. I don’t think that it was a serious intention to hurt anybody. But playing with such things when you’re in such a mental state as you were then, is really dangerous. Biblical topics aren’t funny after all, they can come true fast if only someone has a wish.”

Medusa got cold. She kind of heard what Damiano said, but her brain didn’t process it. She was distracted by the feeling that there was someone else in the ward. But then she ran her eyes around the room, she didn’t see anything so she came back to Damiano and tried to remember what he was talking about.

“Did I have some illness?”

“Not really,” replied Damiano. “However, you experienced some kind of traumatic events, parents’ divorce, school stress, and difficulties, seasonal depression, and also you showed symptoms of false memory syndrome, which can seriously drive you crazy.”

Medusa nodded, even though she wasn’t sure what that is. She didn’t wanna ask, it would be stupid to ask about feelings you felt yourself. But on the other hand, he was a priest and probably knew what she was feeling better than she did herself. She had no idea what she should ask next, finding out other details was timid.

“Do you want to know more?” asked Damiano as if he had read her mind.

Medusa nodded her head hesitantly. Damiano noticed her confusion.

“Well, we may not speak about it,” he slapped his palms gently on his knees and wanted to stand up. “I think it’s time for you to sleep.”

“No no,” started to protest Medusa. “Tell me more, tell me everything.”

Damiano sat again on the bed.

“It could be disturbing,” he warned.

“I know,” admitted Medusa. “But maybe if you’ll tell me I’ll remember something?”

Damiano shrugged. Medusa noticed that it didn’t seem he’d believe in this.

“Why I didn’t die jumping off the bridge?” Medusa remembered the fact that seemed the most illogical to her.

“Luckyness?” laughed Damiano. “There was still the demon’s power in you that affected you physically. That’s my theory.”

Medusa frowned her eyebrows. That sounded horrible. She squeezed her blanket in her fists. Damiano was talking to her so gently even though he said such terrible things and Medusa started to feel like crying. Tears appeared in her eyes, but they didn’t run. Something scratched in the corner of the ward, behind the nightstand, and Medusa flinched immediately turning to that side.

“What?” asked Damiano and Medusa felt the interest in his voice. He didn’t hear it?

“Nothing…” Medusa lied, not knowing why. “It just seemed to me.”

Damiano nodded incredulously. But his gaze was still stuck in the corner in which Medusa was turning her head. He knew very well that she had heard something there. A girl could have seen supernatural creatures from her birth and Damiano was sure that even after this accident nothing really changed. Even though he sent away the demon which made her think that she was Death and kill people, he couldn’t cure her of this ‘illness’. Not yet. Medusa shivered but still wanted to know what happened next.

“How did it go that... I’ve killed them all?” she asked and even from that word she felt bitterness in her mouth.

“Because of bad being of yours and involving into the role, the demon possessed you, not so hard to grasp, huh?” Damiano grinned, but it wasn’t funny for him, he wasn’t mocking. “When everything started to turn crazy, your parents tried to reach your psychiatrist…”

“Victoria?” Medusa interrupted him, remembering that the doctor who was here not so long ago introduced herself as a psychiatrist. That’s why Medusa felt that she knew her from somewhere.

“Yes,” Damiano agreed. “It’s her. You used to visit her for some time before everything. She used to prescribe you sleeping pills and meds that help you to concentrate at school.”

Medusa was curious why she did badly at school, but she didn’t wanna that Damiano would discontinue telling her what happened to her parents and friends. It was so weird to perceive, how interesting what you felt and what life you had, while you don’t remember anything. The sound from behind the nightstand caught Medusa’s attention again, she curled up cowardly, whatever that was, she was the only one who heard it and she got more and more scared. What if that thing there looks scary, or even worse — it can hurt her? Maybe she should tell Damiano, maybe he could help, he was a priest after all… 

“You didn’t like that your parents wanted to help you, usually demons hate when someone is trying to give help to their prey. And your friends got bored playing this game, because whatever you did something always got wrong or unsuccessful, usually what you wanted and never them. Long story short, during one sleepover demon cut through their throats,” Damiano got silent. “Your sister is still alive though, she helped to find doctors and doctors helped to find me. Now you’re clean,” he added.

Damiano wasn’t sure how much he can help saying that she was safe and free from the demon, because knowing that you killed all your loved ones now in any way should feel wrecking. He saw how a single tear dropped down Medusa’s cheek. She sat stuck her eyes to some corner of the ward, but not at the same where she heard the sound. She wasn’t thinking about the creature right there hiding behind her nightstand, she was overwhelmed by the horror which was covered by what Damiano just told her. Perception probably hit hard. One moment Damiano doubted if he did good, however, then came a thought that she deserves to know, she won’t live without any memories and especially this cruel forever. That would be even more inhumane than she felt now.

Prevailed the silence. Medusa began to snort until it became sobbing. Her crying sounds filled the whole room. Damiano looked at her face, how she was covering it, trying to stop dropping tears. Then he gently took her hand and exposed her face. Medusa wasn’t looking him in the eyes, she tried to shut her own as much as possible.

“Dussy, look at me,” comforting and almost lovingly he said to her. “Come on, look…”

Damiano knew that now he couldn’t let a girl out of his sight never. She was the most vulnerable than ever. He also was curious. Curious about what she sees and if he can send it away, even though that not as like the usual demon. He and the group of medics are going to work with this girl as much as it takes.

Medusa didn’t dare to look at Damiano. She didn’t dare to open her eyes in general. She rather doesn’t see anything than know in what reality she was. But Damiano started quietly and softly talking to her.

“I know that it’s insanely scary, but you have to understand that it’s over now… Leave your pain to God. You didn’t do that of your own will, Medusa, I know that you’ll miss your parents and your friends, but we’ll survive that grief and horror. Okay?”

Medusa was shaking her head.

“No…” she said silently. “It can’t be…”

Medusa imagines how she should have done that, how it should have looked like. She, a knife and the blood of loved ones on her hands. All the scariest views were standing in front of her eyes and none of them probably was as scary as it was in reality.

Damiano released a sigh full of sympathy. How else he could have helped her?

“Medusa, you must look at me,” even if he didn’t want to this time his voice sounded demanding and even strict.

Medusa shuddered because of his changed voice tone. She reluctantly and cowardly pulled her hand off her cheeks and hardly met Damiano’s glance. He smiled.

“That’s it. Just like that.”

“I’m scared,” whispered Medusa. She looked at Damiano’s face, it seemed that she was asking for all the possible help and safety that he can provide. Finally, she even decided to admit that, besides everything, she heard sounds from behind her nightstand. “There, behind the nightstand is something… I’m so scared.”

Damiano looked behind it. He was interested in what kind of creature she’d see there, but he didn’t wanna make her look. It was enough stress for this person tonight.

“I understand that you think that what you hear is real, but there’s nothing, trust me. No one can’t hurt you. A little bit unpleasant and that’s it,” he told her. “If you want, I can bless you and the room, if the creature is evil, felt God it’ll leave.”

Medusa snorted and nodded.

“And if it isn’t evil, I’ll still hear it?”

Damiano shrugged.

“Probably, but it couldn’t hurt you.”

Medusa nodded one more time.

“Okay,” said she quietly. “You can… Bless me…” it was a weird word for her, she had never been blessed before. She hasn’t understood how it works, religious classes at school were boring and lifeless, just Damiano looked different to her. He did something to her, she’ll never forget, even though she doesn’t remember how it happened.

Damiano switched his position. He leaned back and the dignity that was inherent to a priest appeared in him, but at the same time, he seemed relaxed and calm. He lifted one hand and made a cross sign in front of Medusa.

“In the name of Father, and the Son and Holy Spirit. Amen,” said he gently and then softly touched Medusa’s forehead with his thumb drawing there a small cross.

Medusa feeling his finger on her forehead closed her eyes and blushed. Down her cheek dropped an unwilling tear again.

“Here you go,” smiled Damiano. “Now you could sleep in peace.”

Medusa opened her eyes and quickly swiped her tear with her baby pink pajama’s sleeve. She didn’t know how she should feel. Will Damiano leave now? She didn’t want to sleep alone, even if nurses were waking in the hallway, Damiano was her small land of safety, at least for now. She still could hear the sound but she calmed down knowing that she has to trust Damiano. No one could hurt her while he was here, and that was the reason why she didn’t wanna him to leave. Horror about the parents and friends had come in waves, making her flinch.

“Are you going to leave?” asked her with fear. She was scared of a positive answer. “Please stay,” added quickly.

It’s going to be hard for Medusa to sleep. Seemed the night was full of nightmares. She needed, that someone would be here beside her when she’ll woke up at night not knowing where she is and screaming in pain with every flashback. She was so scared of it, but that was what gonna follow her for no one knows how long. Maybe for decades, maybe for whole her life, and even after death…

“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart,” Damiano comforted her.

Medusa released a sigh of relief. She adjusted her pillow and lay down. She was still looking at Damiano, at his face, and saw how he smiles. Then she gathered enough courage to take his hand again, but this time herself. His palm was so soft and warm. She squeezed it hard, and Damiano wasn’t resisting. Medusa closed her eyes, if he’ll be here and held her hand, maybe she will succeed to sleep for real, maybe the nightmare will be easier.

“You’ll be here while I sleep?” asked Medusa again, she wanted to be sure.

“Yes yes, I’ll always be here,” he calmed her down. She squeezed his hand so hard that he even felt pain, but he didn’t mind. Let the girl settle down.

Damiano knew that now they’ll spend so much time together. He knew that now he has to protect her from she wouldn’t be doing any bad things. Now he was about to take her with him and be her protector for as much time as it takes.

A/N: This is a very first fic I've ever written. The story will go on :) Thank you for any kind of attention. ❤️

Masterlist 🩸

[ykaaaras]

The Preacher: Chapter 2

Pairing: DAMIANO DAVID x fictional female insert

Chapter summary: Medusa with Damiano are preparing for the funeral. Medusa encounters an unpleasant surprise.

Content: angst, priest Damiano David, supernatural, hurt/comfort, fluff, funeral, demon character, anxiety, fear

Word count: 9k

Warnings: self-loathing, a lot of self-loathing, mention of homicide

After many physical and psychological procedures at the hospital, Medusa finally got better. She still felt the pain in her sides and the nightmares still tortured her, she felt unbearable self-loathing, and honestly, every day was painful. However, she already could have been released from the hospital. After caring, of course. She talked a lot about what happened with Victoria, Ethan, and Damiano, and even though it made her realize things better, she still couldn’t feel full. She felt like an invalid, a criminal. Which at casual circumstances would be logical, it would be the truth. However, Damiano thought differently, he was sure that he can forgive Medusa her sin. The possession was actually serious, Medusa was completely weak-willing during its process.

While Medusa was still at the hospital, but was ready to be released, she sat on her bed and looked at one point somewhere in the ward’s corner. A strange feeling it was, like being let out of prison when your sins are forgiven, even though you know yourself that it isn’t right. Medusa felt a tear dropping down her cheek. She will come back to life, and what then? She will meet her sister, and what she’ll say to her? Sibyl will probably never forgive her, and Medusa clearly understood why. Medusa wouldn’t forgive such a thing too. She left Sibyl an orphan just because of her stupid imprudence. She swiped tears running down her cheeks. And why did all this shit have to happen to her? She didn’t do anything after all, besides that read that fucking book. Medusa pinched her wrist. Fool, she thought at herself.

She was sitting quietly when Victoria came to the ward. She wore a suit pans, which hugged her torso very pretty, and that white doctor’s robe. She watched how Medusa cried for a moment, then she noticed that Medusa was pinching her wrists.

“Come on, stop doing that,” Victoria got slightly angry. “We talked about this, I said to you that self-harm isn’t an escape. You’ll only feel worse.”

Medusa slowly pulled her fingers away from her wrist. Maybe, she would like to say sorry, but she didn’t say anything. She talked with Victoria a lot. About how she feels every day and Victoria prescribed her a medicine about which Medusa didn’t hear anything. She didn’t process her memories overall, everything now was blurry and those people only helped her to remember only what feeling that could be and a few facts about her past. Sleeping was hard, she was afraid to fall asleep because nightmares seemed too realistic. She wanted that Damiano would be there when she sleeps, but he often was somewhere away and Medusa most of her free time used to spend with Thomas. He used to come to her after his lectures and they used to talk about the subtleties of medicine, which Medusa honestly didn’t understand fully, but listening to it was way better than suffocating in her self-loathing and horror.

Victoria’s gaze got a little bit gentler. It seemed like she understood Medusa. Victoria slightly tilted her head.

“The funeral of your loved ones are already prepared. Would you like to attend?” she asked while coming closer to Medusa and sitting near her. “Completely understandable if not.”

Medusa shrugged. Wouldn’t attend her own parents’ and friends’ funerals would be more than disrespectful already because in the sight of Sibyl. However, Medusa didn’t want, if she’ll see dead ones, she’ll probably have a panic attack. She’ll probably start to puke or start crying loudly, distracting the mourners and paying everyone’s attention to herself. No one wants to comfort criminals. No one wants to see how criminals mourn their own victims.

“Which is better?” whispered her. “I don’t know.”

Victoria put her palm on Medusa’s shoulder and patted gently.

“Think about it, Medusa. Damiano will conduct the funeral.”

Medusa frowned. It was even worse. She really will start to wail. She felt the storm of feeling approaching already. She felt sick in her stomach. But she couldn’t not attend, and she knew that, she knew that she’ll attend. Damiano would want it. Medusa nodded.

“I’ll think about it.”

She wanted Victoria to go away because she felt the pressure to think fast when Victoria was near. Victoria stood up. She very squeezed Medusa’s shoulder very gently.

“Take your time. It is still a little bit of time,” it seemed like Victoria did read Medusa’s mind.

She walked away and closed the door behind her. Medusa felt like she was in a cage. Even though Victoria let her think as much as she needs, Medusa still felt like a caught animal, which is fed vegetables by force. But she deserved it. Coercion. She had to suffer for what she did. It was her provision to herself, she was convinced that did a deadly sin and if she won’t go to jail in this life, she’ll go to hell after death. She was so scared. And in general, every step felt like a sin, even eating was hard, Medusa thought that she didn’t deserve it at all. The only thing that helped a bit was that she could have confessed her sins to Damiano a little bit. But she knew that even that was some kind of wrong because she realized that she is attracted to Damiano. He was a priest, Medusa shouldn’t have even a little bit of those thoughts she had.

Sometimes she still hears the creature from behind the nightstand. However, it never crawls out and Medusa was scared of searching for it, she got used to the sound. It could have been some dead patient’s ghost and she didn’t want to see a corpse at all, or it could have been a doppelgänger developed from a dead baby, but Medusa couldn’t imagine what a baby would do in an adult’s psych ward. Maybe some mother hold them before their death. Medusa got cold from such thoughts. Earlier before everything she really would be interested in what is hiding there. Now she didn’t even intend to look for that creature and she hoped that it won’t follow her after she leaves the hospital. It used to happen with others, they would follow Medusa from an old, wooded cemeteries in which she used to wander with her friends. And then they haunted Medusa everywhere she goes, even at home, till she used to start losing her mind. The ghosts used to get bored then, and they didn’t like her anymore because she was always angry.

Then will those funerals be, Medusa thought, Victoria hasn’t said that. Soon she’ll be released, she wonders who will take her. Medusa squirmed in her position and took a peek at her little suitcase. Where will she live? Maybe she’ll go to a crisis center, an orphanage or a prison? All of these options seemed terrible. Where does Sibyl live? Medusa curled up, with their grandparents probably, but they would never take Medusa to live together with them, not after what she did to her parents. They probably renounced her already anyway. Medusa left a person without a place, without an entity, without an insides. She was nothing. The idea of human. The idea without meaning.

A girl closed her eyes. The darkness stood in front of her eyes, the emptiness. Medusa’s mind learned to block horrible images from her parents’ and friends’ massacre and it usually sneaked out through her nightmares while she was asleep. Probably because then she hadn’t any will to resist. She squeezed her eyelids heavily, she heard the scratching from behind the nightstand. Just she would go out of here sooner to a place where she could calm down a little bit, somewhere where wasn’t interesting for supernatural creatures, for example… Medusa didn’t know where such a place could be, those creatures like whatever.

Suddenly someone entered the ward. Medusa rushed to open her eyes. She saw Thomas entering the door. She smiled crookedly. Will he take her somewhere? Tomas took a look at Medusa’s suitcase.

“Take your things. It’s time to go,” he smiled in a friendly, gentle way.

Medusa lifted her eyes to him. Her eyelids suddenly felt hard, she felt tired and very heavy.

“Where will we go?” asked her. The anxiety rushed in her body, where did he intend to take her for real? Medusa was sure that not to his own home. Even though she thought that it would be really nice. Living with Thomas would be a God’s grace to such a monster like Medusa.

Thomas noticed that Medusa wasn’t moving from her position. She sat like she was stuck in her bed.

“Should I take your suitcase?” asked him while laughing quietly.

Thomas was nice. He acted friendly with Medusa. It was understandable that the others were kind of polite, they were working with her health, but Thomas didn’t do that. It wasn’t important to him that Medusa did so much damage. He still willingly communicated with her and even once said that he likes Medusa’s personality, which Medusa hadn’t really believed. She just thought that he considers her as his research object for studies to some project about which he never told Medusa.

“Not needed,” Medusa moved finally. “I’ll take it myself,” she stood up and went to take her suitcase. It was quite heavy almost like her eyelids. And Medusa regretted not letting Thomas carry it, for a second.

Thomas with suspicious disbelief looked at Medusa.

“You sure about that?”

Medusa nodded and lifted her belongings. They came out of the ward and Thomas closed the door behind them.

“Come,” said him, going through the hallway.

Medusa stopped again. She put her suitcase on the floor. She felt stupid and probably annoyed Thomas by not moving fast enough. Thomas turned around, and surprise appeared on his face. Medusa’s stare at him became scared and asking.

“Where?” asked.

Thomas noticed that Medusa was scared. His facial expression became comforting. Medusa stood and was looking at him, her eyes got wet again. Thomas get why she was acting like that, he saw that as a completely natural thing, he never condemned Medusa and didn’t know why even himself.

“It’s okay, Medusa,” he said gently. “We are going to the sacristy of the basilica, to Damiano.”

Medusa’s eyes got wide for a second. To the church? To Damiano? So suddenly she didn’t know how to act. Sometimes Damiano used to visit her, however, he usually was somewhere else and Medusa, of course, understood that probably he was at mass or at some kind of exorcism process. However, now they’ll meet in freedom, and he’ll conduct the funerals and… Then what? She didn’t want them to separate, even though Medusa knew that she always could meet him at the church, but her stupid feelings wouldn’t be satisfied. And in general, Medusa was a little bit scared of the churches. She wanted that, exactly him, Damiano would stay. She could not visit Victoria, could not talk to Ethan, and don’t spend time with Thomas, but being without Damiano she wouldn’t manage.

“Give that case to me,” suddenly Thomas insisted on taking Medusa’s suitcase. When he took it, Medusa felt weird, she didn’t think that she deserves help. Dragging things is suffering since childhood, no one wants to do it by themselves.

Medusa was following Thomas. Just coming out of the building into fresh air Medusa immediately felt the wind. The whole week was rainy and the other probably will be the same, so the funeral has foreseen gloomy and rainy as well. They have foreseen really gloomy, more gloomy than it already was. Thomas put things into the car’s trunk.

“You can drive?” curiously asked Meduza, because she didn’t wanna that Thomas would think that she was cocky and doesn’t want to talk with him. All the time while they were going through the hallway, neither Medusa nor Thomas, haven’t said a word. She wasn’t sure why he should think that, but she tried to convince herself that probably because he had to carry her things.

Thomas nodded. The thought of a funeral didn’t abandon Medusa’s mind, the mass will be held in the big basilica, there probably live a lot of creatures, maybe not evil, but really annoying. They’ll think that Medusa wants to interact, however, now Medusa wasn’t in the mood to play with ghosts at all. On the other hand, at the cemetery could have swarmed evil ones too, you never know, she needed to ask Damiano to bless her as much as he can, bless her whole. Like he did that time.

“Yes, I drive,” Medusa was wakened up from her thoughts by Thomas's voice. “But the car isn’t mine. It belongs to Damiano, he don’t need to use it often so he borrows it to me.”

Medusa swayed her head but didn’t say anything. The car was full of Damiano’s scent.

~~~

To enter the sacristy wasn’t necessary to walk through the church. Getting in there was possible from the inner yard. The sacristy was the room where were stored ecclesiastical items, that were used during the mass or the procession process. In this basilica, the room was quite big, at the usual churches they were considerably modest. Damiano was sitting at his desk, he probably used to accept the faithful ones, who had some kind of questions. When Medusa noticed how he was sitting, she blushed. Damiano almost laid in his chair and was swinging in it. He looked so relaxed, legs spread open, and one of their heels was put on the other’s knee. Sometimes Medusa wondered how this man exorcises demons and at the same time is so calm, it seemed like he wasn’t bothered by anything. How he was a priest altogether. But Medusa liked it. When he was near, it felt like nobody can ever hurt you. He was the guarantee of a safety. Everything that Medusa needed. When he saw them, he didn't even bother to change his sitting position, but his face lighten up with a smile.

“Here you are,” said him cheerfully. “Now I’ll have an excuse why I can’t accept old ladies who want to gossip, anymore.”

Thomas giggled. Medusa was kind of amazed by Damiano’s words, however, their good mood cheered Medusa too. Here was way more fun than at the hospital, even though she was here for not so long, she’ll go soon to the place about which she don’t know yet. She was afraid of the women’s penitentiary. Damiano looked at Medusa. Examined her carefully with his gaze. Medusa heated up.

“How is Duzzy doing?” asked gently. Medusa always shivered with some weird pleasure, when he called her Duzzy.

Medusa didn’t understand if the question was intended for her or for Thomas, so she didn’t answer, just lowered her eyes and changed her standing position, in other words, squirmed. At first, her eyes were running around the patterned carpet, then her gaze stopped at the little cross that was hanging on the wall. Medusa frowned. She wondered how badly God will punish her. People are afraid that God will punish them because they masturbate, maybe they come to Damiano to confess such sins… Medusa caught herself thinking of it and her mind with shame came back to the point where she was thinking about herself. So what about her then? She was a murderer. The tears filled her eyes again. She felt how she would love to be with her parents right now, that they would be near. She wished she could live a normal life, stupid that she didn’t recall what it was like.

“She’s alright,” answered Thomas to Damiano’s question, seeing that Medusa don’t intend to speak herself. Damiano dramatically lifted his chin and nodded.

“ I see.”

Medusa couldn’t understand what that could mean. He probably was talking sarcastically. Does it seem so clear that she’s in a completely miserable position both physically and mentally, that even the phrase ‘she’s alright’ seemed so unbelievable?

Medusa glanced at Damiano’s face by the stealth. He was so handsome. She had to ask him something so he wouldn't notice that she was meaninglessly staring.

“Could I meet my sister?” Medusa remembered Sibyl. She was surprised when Damiano shook his head.

“Only at the funeral. She asked to keep her away from you.”

Medusa’s ears got tense and she started to sweat. She somewhat expected that, but to hear that was way more painful than telling it inside of your head. Medusa would instinctively ask ‘why’, but it would be so stupid that she even refrained. It’s better to say nothing. She was thinking what will she say to her sister, apologise would be worthless. Sibyl wasn’t that person who easily forgives, she was difficult to negotiate, and honestly if not for this incident, Medusa even wouldn’t desire to meet her. Sibyl was older and during one session Ethan said, that when he talked with their mom, earlier before everything happened, she said that Sibyl used to hurt Medusa when they were children. And hurt badly, however, he didn’t say why and how, said that he don’t know, and their mom didn’t speak of that, but Medusa didn’t believe. She hardly trusted anyone. Ethan was good to her, but sometimes he seemed a little bit… Suspicious. Even though he was a therapist, he had some kind of strange mystery and something in his entity did emphasize it. All of them were strange, to be honest. It was weird how Medusa’s destiny occurred. Unbelievable.

“So I won’t be adopted by my grandparents?” quietly asked her, lowering her head. What kind of question was that. She knew the answer, and knew it really well.

“Of course not,” casually answered her question Damiano, justifying her thoughts. “Why did you think that they intend to adopt you?”

Medusa shrugged. She got unbearably sad, they all will be at the funeral, but she couldn’t be a part of that family ever again. Poor girl. Down her cheeks actually dropped a unwilling tears.

“But where I’m going to live then?” snored her from now abundantly flowing tears.

Damiano observed how Medusa cries with a curious expression on his face. He smiled comfortingly.

“Don’t worry, you’re not going to jail,” he laughed. Medusa didn’t get why he was so not worried at all. Medusa felt ruined. If not to the jail, then where? Is there a worse place? Where she deserves to be imprisoned. Where? To the penitentiary? To a psych ward?... Again, just this time for forever. Anyway, she has to be jailed somewhere, how she’ll redeem her guilt?

Medusa started to shake her head. She didn’t understand.

“Then?...”

Damiano was snapping a pen between his fingers. From his expression, it didn’t seem that he would be preparing for the funeral overall. It made Medusa frown. It felt like he was mocking her. Because of nerves, Medusa felt her limbs itching and tears became bitter. She pressed her lips together hard. Damiano’s eyes stopped running around the room and now captured directly to Medusa’s face.

“You’re going to live with me,” he snapped his pen once again and let it go. The pen jumped out of his hand and landed on the desk. “Unless you don’t want it.”

Medusa listened for a moment. Then she got a little shock. At first, she couldn’t believe what she heard. It even seemed funny to her. She stupidly and hardly, through the tears released a small laugh. But it wasn’t a funny laugh, it more reminded a question.

“But you’re… A priest?” said her lifting her head.

Damiano shrugged, he rolled the pen with his index finger. He gently chuckled.

“You think I don’t have a home? Because I’m a priest?”

Medusa felt ashamed. She just wasn’t expecting that. She had a lot of with this related questions, but she knew that she can’t ask them. It would be even more shameful than just standing in silence. Medusa a little bit lost and cowardly looked around the room, her eyes caught the cross again, but she tried not to stay there for too long. Soon she took a peek at near her standing Thomas. When he saw that she was looking, he gently nodded as if he agreed with Damiano and Medusa’s face got all red.

“Not at all,” wanted to justify herself, but then she realized that it was hopeless. “Okay,” only said, agreeing with the fact that she will have to live with a priest.

It probably appeared funny to Damiano, but he got himself not to laugh, Medusa already was damaged enough, mocking would be unethical. And Damiano didn’t want to mock. Medusa was just so cute to him, she had so much pain in her heart, and Damiano understood why. The good mood he only wanted to help her understand that she was safe. Worry and grieving really were for what, but gnawing yourself to the bone only makes everything worse. She must know what she did, but not lose her self-control, which was needed to survive it. Finally, Damiano sighed, remembering that they must talk about the funeral. He glanced at a tears swiping Medusa.

“So, you’re going to attend the funeral procession, Dussy?” asked, taking his notebook and gently spreading through its pages. He got serious. His voice tone sounded more like an order than a question. Medusa felt that, she shrugged.

“I…” started to stutter her. “I’m not sure that I want it.”

“You think it depends on your wish?” Damiano’s voice now was completely serious, so serious that was inherent to a priest before a funeral. “I think that you must. You think differently?” 

“I don’t know if I’m ready enough…” quietly sighed Medusa.

“You had enough time to do it. They’re your relatives.”

Medusa had no other choice, but just to nod. He was right, but she was so scared. She couldn’t look at the faces of the dead ones, even though she knew that she’ll have to say goodbye to them forever. And what if one of the dead will resurrect as a ghost and start to follow Medusa for all of her life, everywhere she goes, reminding her of what she did. That would be deadly scary. She shivered from such thought and started to gaze at Damiano. It was strange to her how fast he changed from a kind and friendly to serious and strict. She felt so weird, that she was talking with Damiano at all. She unwillingly blushed. Deep inside it looked attractive to her. However, it was shameful for Medusa to admit it so because of that it stayed deep inside, somewhere between her brain nooks and crannies.

“When will the funeral be?” cowardly asked her, realizing that this was a piece of information that she didn’t know yet.

“Tomorrow. Noon,” Damiano answered. He marked something in his notebook and a smile appeared on his face again. “Do you have something to wear?” asked again, gazing at Medusa’s yellow hoodie. 

Medusa shrugged. She hadn’t anything else to wear. She probably will have to go to her home and take black clothes. Thinking that she’ll come back to her home, was a weird feeling. Will there be the same scent and atmosphere, which used to persist there? The yellowish shade of the sun’s reflections, in the combination of slightly pink walls and furniture. It used to look a little bit unconventionally, but at the same time, it was also somehow intimate. Medusa missed that room. It seemed that centuries passed since the last time she was there. Even though she actually didn’t know how much time passed since the possession. Medusa, on the other hand, hadn’t remembered what the feeling was to be there. What a feeling was being at home, and even having them after all. Now she was, let’s say, homeless.

“Well, it means we are going to visit your home,” Damiano laughed quietly. “Maybe it will be beneficial for you. You’ll remember something tangible, for example.”

Medusa nodded. If he says so… Damiano began to stand up. He put a notebook on the desk’s surface and the pen into a pencil case. He wore a black suit jacket and approached to coat rack he took his leather jacket and put it on.

“Let’s go?” said, throwing up a bit sacristy’s keys into the air, and catching it in his palm. “Where are my car keys, Thomas?”

Thomas dug in his pocket a bit and then handed Damiano his keys to his palmful. They headed toward the exit, but Medusa left standing in her position. She kind of turned to the exit’s side but didn’t dare to go. She was stopped by the fear of actually facing the real memories. What if she’ll remember something she wouldn’t want to? What if Sibyl will be at home? Meeting her so suddenly would be really scary, so sudden without preparation, Medusa wouldn’t know what to say. But Sibyl probably has a lot to say to her. That was what Medusa thought. She stood like that looking at how Damiano and Thomas stopped by the door and turn to her. Medusa hardly blushed, but she just couldn’t, stupid, but trauma probably was so bad that even the thought of getting back to the place where she lived before committing a crime that she actually committed, was freezing. She felt nauseous and her bones froze into one place. Damiano didn’t look surprised, instead of that Medusa noticed the tenderness in his eyes. Medusa felt something in her stomach.

“It’s okay, Dussy, we just going to take some clothes,” he comforted her. “What’s the worst that can happen?” asked. “Nothing,” then answered his own question and giggled.

Medusa always felt a little bit calmer when Damiano was in such a mood. Slightly kind. He was a priest and also an exorcist, how could she not trust him? And if he isn’t nervous about anything it means there’s no actual reason to be stressed about for real. Medusa hardly moved. She approached the boys and they went toward the car.

Damiano drove not like appropriate for a priest. Medusa could say that he even almost didn’t follow road traffic regulations. But only almost. The police wouldn’t catch him because there would be nothing to accuse him of. It looked like Damiano was clever. He drove fast but didn’t seem to be in a hurry. Medusa guessed that he drive like that because of his own pleasure. Silent music was playing in the car. Medusa leaned her head to the back of the seat. The views running together with the car, through the window looked blurry.

When Damiano unlocked the doors of the apartment, Medusa almost puked. When she sniffed the scent of the home, she also felt that without all this aroma, the apartment was also reeking of the scent of blood. Is it the place where she did slaughter her parents and friends? Damiano put his keys in his pocket. He cautiously entered the apartment. Will Medusa need just to take her things from her wardrobe and they’ll leave? Suddenly, before going to her room Medusa heard something. She stopped and listen attentively. There was something in Sibyl’s room. Medusa swallowed hardly. Is sister at home? She turned to Damiano interrogatively. He shrugged but it seemed like he knew. Medusa sighed silently and with the pain. She won’t avoid it. Anyhow.

“Sibyl?!” called out Damiano. “Are you home?”

Medusa closed her eyes. He wasn’t sure whether she was at home, or he just didn’t say it to Medusa? Someone went out of the room. It was Sibyl. The sister of Medusa. In her eyes appeared the same horror as in Medusa’s when they saw each other. Now Medusa won’t avoid the hurtful speech nohow. However, she was surprised when a few minutes passed and Sibyl didn’t say a word. She stared at Damiano as if she was asking what Medusa was doing here.

“We came to take black clothes for the funeral. What you’re doing here?” Damiano pushed Medusa so she start to move from the hall to the hallway. At first, she obeyed but then she stopped again. She grasped that Sibyl is not going to say anything. It was a way uglier feeling than Medusa thought. It would be better if Sibyl would deliver a painful speech or shout at her, but Medusa got that Sibyl just doesn’t have what to say. She did not consider Medusa her sister anymore, or her relative, and nothing that would be related to her, nothing that was worth talking to.

“I…” Sibyl started to say to Damiano. “I also pick things. Today I’m moving to my grandparents for good. And… picking my parents’ things that I would like to put to their grave.”

Medusa’s eyes got wet. She was curious about what things she had picked. Medusa thought that she knows, it could be mom’s perfume bottles and her dad’s favorite tie. Also, the souvenir statues that they brought from the various countries. Her parents used to love traveling and their souvenirs were so precious to them. A little bit and Medusa will start to cry and shout because of sorrow and self-loathing, but she controlled herself.

“Okay,” said Damiano. “We’re here not for long,” he gently took Medusa’s hand. “Come on, Dussy, let’s go.”

Medusa came to her room. Her room had pinkish walls and from behind burgundy-colored curtains sneaked a greyness of the day. The room looked gloomy and sad. However, no matter how weird a feeling it was to be here, she still couldn't remember anything. Only what her brain did recall about the parents’ belongings which they loved. And even though the scent of blood was very strong. Medusa couldn’t say how she killed her loved ones. Damiano probably notice that Medusa was only confused. She didn’t think anything sensible, her head didn’t process any useful detail of the memories. He frowned because Medusa just stood and didn’t do anything. Again.

“Find those clothes,” he ordered to her, and Medusa looked at him with a gaze that said ‘I don’t know where it is’. “Comeee on,” Damiano whined and pointed his finger to the chest of the drawers standing nearby.

Medusa nodded and opened one drawer. There was underwear, she frowned, blushed, and hurried to close it. Finally, only when she opened all of the drawers one by one, she found black clothes. She messed them up a little bit till she decided that found a dress appropriate for the funeral. She took it to her lap and looked at Damiano.

“That’s all,” said her. “I think this one will be suitable.”

Damiano tilted his head and its gesture showed Medusa to come with him.

“Let’s go out of here. Your presence in the apartment disturbs your sister.”

Medusa clenched her teeth. Hearing that was a wreaking feeling. Grasp that it was the truth, felt unrealistic. Sibyl and Medusa, now at their age, kind of got along earlier, the pique about sibyl hurting Medusa in their childhood was already faded. Now everything turned around.

Her nod was blunt. Passing by Sibyl, she felt her legs numb. She thought that she’ll fall. Sibyl was talking with Thomas. She didn’t seem happy at all, she probably told painful things to Thomas instead. Maybe not about Medusa, but clearly nothing vivacious. Thomas looked serious too.

“Well,” opening the door and holding Medusa’s hand said Damiano. “See you, tomorrow,” He waved at Sibyl. She slightly and a little bit confused waved back to him.

Thomas said goodbye to Sibyl too and came out of the apartment after Damiano and Medusa. Sibyl will stay alone in a blood-stinking home again. Medusa lowered her eyes. That’s all. Tomorrow will probably be the last day when she’ll sees her own sister. She wondered how much time had to pass till she’ll get used to it. Medusa kicked the little stone on the path. Stupidity.

“Damiano?” Medusa lifted her eyes to him when he let off her hand and started to look for car keys in his pockets.

“Mhm,” mumbled Damiano kindly, looking at Medusa from above.

“Where I’m going to sleep tonight?” asked her, but deep inside she thought that she suspect the answer. She’ll probably need to spend a night at the sacristy. However, Medusa got surprised by Damiano’s reply.

“At my place.”

“At your home?” Medusa frowned. Damiano gently laughed.

“Not this time. At my place, I mean at the church's rectory. I’ll spend a night there myself tonight. I need to prepare for the funeral.”

“Okay,” blushed Medusa. She felt stupid because she thought that she’s gonna stay at Damiano’s home. It seemed even bold and she was wondering what Damiano was thinking about that if he thought about it at all. Medusa was overthinking everything now.

~~~

The church’s rectory was a kinda big apartment, which was set up with a bedroom and office. In the bedroom, big windows opened the view to the fountain. Medusa stared there for some time. The bed was also quite big, there could have fit two people that was for sure. But it was a sin to even think that she could sleep in one bed with Damiano. However, such a thought was somehow pleasurable that she let it in for a while. She even fantasized that they could cuddle. But when Damiano came into the room she remembered that he was a priest after all because his white collar was seen so clearly that it was hard to forget that. And since he was a priest she shouldn’t be thinking even about touching him. More than he takes her hand himself.

Medusa stood holding her clothes and a few more things she took from her home in her lap. She wasn’t sure where she should put all of it.

“Just place them on the bed,” Damiano noticed that Medusa was still standing a little bit confused. She obeyed and put her things on the bed covered with a red blanket. Then sat. She stared through the window. The water in the fountain looked grey like everything else. To be honest, in all this greyness that persisted inside and outside, only that bed’s blanket stuck in the eyes.

It was getting dark outside and Damiano turned the light on in the bedroom.

“You’re going to sleep here,” he said and smiled at Medusa. “If you need something, I’ll be at my office.”

Medusa nodded.

“Okay,” answered her and felt stupid again just this time she didn’t know why.

When Damiano left the room, Medusa left sitting on the bed. She swung her legs. She has to go to the bathroom and change into pajamas. But suddenly she was hit by the perception, that she forget to take her pajamas from home. She was trying so hard not to dig into her underwear drawer for too long, that she forgot to take half of the things that she needed. Sleeping with clothes on would be uncomfortable, but it was the only option that was left to her. Medusa’s clothes were very uncomfy, sleeping with a hoodie would be too hot, but underneath it, she had only a bra. Also, she wore jeans. So the only choice was to sleep just with a hoodie, even though it stank like blood. The scent she brought back from her home. She was impatient to put it into the washing machine.

She slowly walked away from the room. She had to find a bathroom. Medusa wandered a little bit around the apartment. Then coming through Damiano’s office, thought maybe she should ask him. She took a peek through the door crack. Damiano sat at his desk, put one leg on another just as he sat in the sacristy. He watched his phone, seemed like he was reading something. Near him on the desk was laying a pile of papers and a couple of books. Medusa half-opened the door, Damiano lifted his head in sudden and placed his phone on the table by other things.

“I wasn’t expecting that you’ll need me so soon. So, what happened?” Damiano smiled cunningly and changed his sitting position. Now he leaned his head on his palms and put elbows on the surface of the desk.

At first, Medusa shrugged and for a moment realized that maybe she did a mistake by coming here. She could bet that bathroom will be at the most obvious place ever. But now it was too late. The decision was made and she had to admit what she came for to him.

“I need to use the bathroom. Could you tell me where it is?”

It seemed like Damiano got surprised, but so unrealistically. Medusa wondered why he should pretend, but then he said.

“You only needed to look directly in front of your bedroom. I left doors open on purpose.”

“Oh.”

Then Damiano added.

“Forgive me, I forgot to mention it earlier.”

Medusa shook her head.

“It’s okay,” she said and cursed herself inside, that she couldn’t manage to look in front of her nose. She looked everywhere just not there it was.

Damiano lowered his eyes somewhere onto the papers as if he was expecting Medusa will go to use the bathroom. But Medusa was still standing, she needed some clothes made for sleep to sleep with. Maybe there were some nightdresses or pajamas, there was a wardrobe and a lot of drawers in that room after all. Medusa was sure that it wasn’t for sacred clothes, it was kept in the sacristy. Just she was afraid to look in there without the permission, of course.

After some time Damiano lifted his head again. Medusa held the door handle and swung it back and forth.

“Something else?” asked Damiano, his voice was so soft as if he was talking to a kitten. Medusa got a little bit surprised by his changed tone.

“I need pajamas…” Medusa squinted guiltily. “I forgot it at home.”

Damiano shrugged like saying ‘and?’ but soon his eyes widened when he grasped what Medusa wanted from him for real.

“Well, something such as pajamas I don’t have here.”

Medusa nodded but deep inside she felt disappointed. She didn’t want to sleep with that hoodie, it had too many horrible experiences. But then, Damiano had begun to stand up from his chair.

“But maybe we’ll find something…”

Medusa was watching his face while he was walking past her. Damiano gestured his hand so Medusa would go with him. Medusa followed him.

Damiano entered the room and opened the wardrobe. There were hanging a lot of black shirts and white ones. Damiano took them and spread them in front of him.

“Do you think these would be suitable for you?”

Medusa wanted to shrug but realizing that she won’t get anything better nodded. She wasn’t sure how she felt about sleeping in Damiano’s shirt, it was so weird, but Damiano didn’t look very affected by it, he just stared at Medusa waiting for a verbal answer. Finally, Medusa understood it.

“They’re okay… I guess,” she said and Damiano put those shirts into her lap. Before walking away he stood one more time to take a peek at Medusa. She looked broken. She needed sleep, but she was afraid of nightmares. Perceive that she won’t be able to talk to her sister ever again should have felt terrible, and not having any memories even if they were bad, was probably tiring. Damiano peered at her face seeing how she lowers her eyes feeling his gaze on her.

“Don’t be afraid, Dussy, it’s safe here,” Damiano comforted her. “I’ll be nearby.”

Medusa nodded. She wondered if there were creatures here. But she realized that she was practically in a church and this thought calmed her down. Even if there were any, they won’t be evil. Also, Damiano will be here.

“Thank you.”

Damiano left. Medusa used a bathroom and dug into the blankets. It felt so nice to lay not in the hospital and all clean and… In Damiano’s shirts. She squirmed, her feet were cold. The blankets here were warm, soft, and cozy, the blanket itself was royal size, and it could have covered up few people for sure. Medusa considered if she should turn the night light off. Then she chose to sleep in the dark anyway. When the light was turned off the reflections of the street lights started to penetrate through the window. In the dark only with a little lamp on she was used to sleeping at the hospital. Medusa fell asleep.

She probably was deep asleep and had a nightmare or maybe experienced a sleep paralysis because opened her eyes she saw something in the dark. She felt that she can’t move and the first thought that came to her mind was ‘not again’. Her eyes started to run around the room, but they couldn’t grope anything, the light wasn’t penetrating through the window, and she didn’t see the wardrobes or the nightstand. However, there was something else. Something alive.

Medusa tried to make a sound but she managed only to squeal. She got deadly scared when someone started to approach her. God, she thought, please save me. No matter what that was, please don’t let it possess me again, she preyed. But then in front of her, she saw some kind of human. At first, she noticed little, red horns and later she perceived that it was a girl. In the dark, her facial features were blurred, but Medusa still could have seen them. A girl came near the bed. Medusa saw how she smiles. Medusa couldn’t move and honestly, that girl, whoever she was could have done everything she wanted to her. She had horns, which means she was a devil, Medusa thought. It was so scary and when that devil extended her finger and squeezed Medusa’s forehead a little bit, she let the silent squeal again. However, the girl’s finger was soft and Medusa almost could smell the scent of the perfume. That creature even wore clothes. 

“Have trouble sleeping?” asked her and chuckled quietly. Maybe it was some kind of ghost, that used to live here? “That means you don’t know what’s waiting for you. You can do way worse things than kill people whom deep down you didn’t even love. You’re happy just don’t let yourself understand that.”

What she was talking about? Medusa shut her eyes. Medusa wouldn’t even ever think that she doesn’t love her parents or friends. And even more, so that she’s happy that had killed them.

“We both would be such good friends. It’s such a shame that you got along with that… Priest. I have no idea why but he’ll really try to separate me from you,” suddenly girl spread her both hands at Medusa. “Booh… I am you.”

Medusa felt herself flinch unwillingly when that girl scared her. Medusa would have said something, but unfortunately, she couldn’t speak. So she let that creature say heartbreaking and horrible things to her.

“I’ll follow you until you start losing your mind,” a girl warned, and Medusa sensed that she was saying that as if she was joking, then she heard a silent laugh that proved her guess right. “You’d ask why right? Just because. You look like a fun person.”

It was so strange to Medusa what that girl was talking about. Medusa never in her life hadn’t seen such a creature yet. Only one explanation was that she was a ghost. But what such ghost would do in a church rectory? She looked evil, but at the same time kind of not. Very weird, those horns were triggering Medusa because they made her doubt. They were even a little bit funny but what creature without chimeras and animals in general, would have them, only a devil. But Medusa couldn’t remember seeing devils. Medusa was scared, but she wasn’t feeling like she feels when she sees a really evil creatures. Even though a girl was talking unpleasant things, she was always giggling and Medusa felt like she wasn’t talking seriously.

“You like him?” asked the creature. However, once again grasping that Medusa can’t speak, answered her own question. “Of course you like him, he’s hot, right? But I don’t like him… I don’t know why. He’s somehow weird.”

A girl sat down near Medusa’s legs and patted her shins.

“Poor girl you are.”

Medusa frowned as hard as her strength let. She wished for a morning to come sooner and this creature would disappear. Or maybe she wasn’t afraid of the light? Maybe she was some human who broke into the room through the window? Maybe those horns aren’t real? Maybe someone was playing with Medusa? But her doubts vanished when she remembered that she can’t move. She stuck her gaze to the ceiling.

“He should have some conscience, I hope you understand that he exorcised that demon — who was my mate by the way — not without a reason?”

A mate, Medusa thought, that means she’s actually a demon. Medusa got cold. A little bit too cold.

“You fell into the trap. The only way out is to trust me,” a girl squinted. “Will you trust me?”

Medusa tried to say something and she almost succeed, but a girl suddenly stood up and pushed her finger on Medusa’s lips.

“Shhh… He might hear us,” she gently spread Medusa’s lips and started to stick her finger into Medusa’s mouth. Now Medusa had not even a little idea what was happening. She stick her finger deeper and deeper till Medusa started to choke. A girl was giggling and Medusa choked and choked louder and louder and louder…

“Medusa…”

Medusa couldn’t understand who had said that because she started to catch air so hard she jumped and sat in her bed. Her eyes started running around the room like crazy, looking for a creature. Finally, she grasped that the room is lightened up and Damiano is in it. She probably was making loud sounds. He interrogatively looked at Medusa.

“I… I…” Medusa wasn’t sure how to explain, everything already felt like an ordinary nightmare now, so she decided that it was probably just a nightmare, only a very realistic and vivid one. But like Damiano often says — nightmares are harmless. “I had a nightmare.”

Medusa noticed disbelief in Damiano’s eyes. He came near and sat on the bed.

“What had you dreamt?” asked.

Medusa began to reproduce her nightmare. She interpreted that the girl was a demon. She said it was her mate, so she knew it.

“It was a demon…”

Damiano’s eyes extended for a second. Could have it been the demon that had possessed her before? But that had to be impossible, Damiano thought, he sent away that demon. Also, here in such a place as a church rectory, it couldn’t even appear.

“In what shape?”

“Human.”

It was unexpected to Damiano. He wanted to ask what that human looked like, but he refrained. That would be a memory probably too disturbing for Medusa. Then Damiano realized that she probably didn’t have a nightmare. He quickly thought about the sleep paralysis demon. And that calmed him down, they usually aren’t real.

“I couldn’t talk or move and she looked very very human.”

She.

“You probably experienced a sleep paralysis,” comforted Damiano Medusa. “Nothing harmful. It can be sometimes. And especially when you’re traumatized.”

Medusa nodded. It could have been the truth that what she saw was simply unreal. The horrors of subconsciousness reproduce in form of hallucinations. She trusted Damiano, not her own head or feelings. After that incident, Medusa overthinks a lot of things. She lifted her head to Damiano. He was watching her.

“Come,” suddenly said opening his arms. “Maybe a hug will help you to calm down.”

For a moment, Medusa seemed to realize that Damiano knew. Knew how much she likes him. She crawled out of her blanket. Damiano’s shirt was a little bit too oversized for her, she snagged in them trying to reach Damiano. Then gently sat in his lap. She felt how he put his palm on the top of her head and softly patted her. Medusa closed her eyes, she started to blush. Damiano didn’t say anything. His fingers were running through her hair and Medusa realized how safe she was. The safest as she could be. All those demons were fading in her memory while she was with Damiano. She didn’t feel how she started to sink herself. Finally, calm and quiet she sank into a deep sleep. 

~~~

Medusa saw how to the funeral are gathering many of her known people. She wore her black, lacy dress, stood in the doorway of the entryway, and didn’t dare to go to the armory hall. The mass should have begun soon. She noticed how Sibyl enter the room. Maybe she had to go to her and say something for the last time. Apologize. What else she could say? Even though the anxiety was shattering, she decided to try. She cowardly sneaked out of the entryway and started to quietly and slowly so nobody noticed, approaching Sibyl. She heard how many of the attendance were silently wailing. Medusa never felt worse. She just hoped that she’ll reach Sibyl without being noticed. At the mass, she must keep her distance from everyone else. At first, Sibyl hadn’t noticed Medusa, but when she felt how Medusa touch her shoulder she flinched. Her eyes extended from an unpleasant surprise. She didn’t try to say something, she just interrogatively stared at Medusa.

“Sibyl…” started to say Medusa but didn’t know how she should continue. Her sister still was silent. She was so angry, sad, and disappointed, but what else Medusa could expect? Medusa couldn’t find any other words and just said. “I’m sorry. So much.”

Sibyl snorted a laugh. At that moment, someone else touched her shoulder. They glared at Medusa judgmentally for a moment but said nothing.

“I’m very sorry…” said them to Sibyl.

Medusa walked away. That was the last time and it was so… Quiet and stupidly sad. Medusa’s eyes got wet and soon hot tears were running down her face. Well, at least she said that, at least she apologized. It was stupid to expect, but maybe now the sorrow will leave her heart.

Finally, it was time to gather in the church. While everyone tried to approach to dead ones as closely as possible, Medusa stood at the very end of the church. She tried not to look at those corpses, she didn’t take a peek not even once. She shuddered at the mere thought of those cold bodies for which she once had such warm feelings for them and they for her.

When the mass began, Medusa started to glance at Damiano who was holding them. He looked so calm and cold. A little bit different that yesterday when he hugged her. He was dressed in weird clothes and spoke words that Medusa didn’t understand. She never visited churches. Maybe that was her mistake.

Medusa started to look around the church. It was beautiful here, but suddenly her eyes caught one thing. They haven’t stayed there for long, but then suddenly came back. She froze, her eyes were wide as never now. There, not very far away, a little bit separated from the crowd, between pillars stood a girl. And… Her facial features were completely the same as the girl’s in Medusa’s nightmare, everything was like in it, as much as Medusa had remembered. Just that Medusa couldn’t have said if she had horns or not because she wore a little pillbox hat with laces. For a moment a girl didn’t notice that Medusa was watching. Her eyes were impaled on Damiano. Impaled so intensively that it seemed like she’ll suck his soul out. She had a little cunning and soft smile on her face. Then Medusa’s stare probably got her attention. She turned to Medusa, looked surprised, then grinned to Medusa. That was girly, but the most creepy grin Medusa had ever seen. A girl lifted two of her index fingers to her lips as if she was saying to Medusa to smile together. But when she saw that Medusa hadn’t had any intention to do so, she came near and stood beside Medusa. Medusa felt shivers running down her spine. A girl looked at Medusa, then at Damiano. It’s a hallucination, it’s only a hallucination, tried to calm herself down Medusa, she’s not real…

“You think he can’t see me?” softly asked her and Medusa recognized the voice. She shook her head. “Ah,” a girl laughed slightly. “You wanna I’ll prove you wrong?”

Medusa shook her head again. However, her interlocutor cheerfully jumped a little in her spot and then made her way through the people to the altar. Medusa was watching her. It was so scary.

A girl climbed on the pulpit near Damiano and did a little mimic with her fingers as if she is spreading his lips into a smile. But she wasn’t touching him, just playing something. It seemed that no one saw her, and Medusa calmed down a little. However, when Medusa looked more attentively, she saw that he was slowly reacting to the girl’s movements. But he was acting like he was completely unbothered. If he sees her that means other sees her too. But maybe they’re so concentrated on dead ones and Damiano’s sermon, that aren’t paying attention? That would be too weird. Something was wrong. Very wrong.

He was so cold and unresponsive, if Medusa wasn't so intense, she probably wouldn’t notice any reaction from him. Maybe her eyes were lying to her?

But he can see the girl. He can see. Or at least feel, the thought didn’t leave Medusa. Damiano saw, he saw. But he can pretend so good. So good, that it’s even creepy. A tear dropped down Medusa’s cheek. He sees just pretends so good…

A/N: Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it. Any kind of attention motivates to write further 😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Masterlist 🩸

[ykaaaras]

Under The Border

Nicole is 19 years old, she's living in the rough Russian suburbs and is the type of girl who most of her time spends hanging out with boys and playing basketball. Boys take her for granted forgetting that she's a girl, a girl with mental problems, a messed up family, and a big crush on one of her friends.

This story doesn't intend to condemn, insult or preach. It's pure fiction.

READ HERE ❤️‍🔥

Pls support me if you liked what you read :)

[ykaaaras]

The Bloody Poppy main characters announcement. The action is held in our era, Italy. The story is from Damiano's pov, 3rd person. Daniela ran away to Italy after the incident so she’d avoid her family and old mates. She spent all her last money on a trip. When Daniela meets Damiano she is homeless with very damaged mental health. As well as he finds her interesting, he also feels the excitement to help her, however, Damiano also has an intention to keep her so she’d participate in his (illegal) activities he wants to intend. He promises her safety so she won’t be so scared about getting in touch with her past. Daniela becomes dependent on Damiano.

[writingmaneskin]

Handwritten - An Ethan Torchio Story || Chapter Seven

Pairings: Ethan Torchio x OC Character

Summary: Words are magic and when one author pours their heart and soul into something, the Universe just…answers.

A/N: I think this is one of the fluffiest things I've ever written.

Fluff, mentions of smut 👀

Words: 3329

THE HANDWRITTEN MASTERLIST

THE MAIN MASTERLIST

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Aurora hummed quietly while adding the finishing touches to the table as Ethan started serving the pasta. 

“Thomas is thinking about settling with Tom.” Ethan blurted out, his friend’s words still clouding his mind. Thomas and Tom’s relationship was newer than his and Auri’s, yet Ethan knew Thomas well enough to know that he would not back out on this and he spoke his mind only because he was sure.

“I am really happy to hear this. Tom and Thomas deserve all the happiness in the world.” Auri said between bites.

“Yes, they do.” 

Auri reached out and squeezed his hand gently.

“I am really happy to be here with you.” 

“I am really happy too, cara.” Ethan wiped his mouth before kissing her very gently.

**

“Is it okay if I stay over tonight?” Ethan asked after they finished dinner.

“I was hoping you would.” Auri admitted.

Her words made him smile.

“I’m going to miss our time together when I am on the road.” 

“I am going to miss you.” Auri looked at him.

“I’ll be back, you know that.” 

“I know, but missing you will still be a thing when you are not here.” She went to him and pressed a kiss to his jaw.

“Would it be okay if I take something of yours with me on the road?” He held her and ran a hand through her hair.

“Of course, you can have whatever you want.” Auri smiled.

“Thank you, cara.” He kept holding her.

“I am going to need something of yours too, you know.” 

“The shirts you already stole are insufficient?” 

“I did not steal them! You left them here and I just sleep in them!” 

Ethan chuckled.

“What is mine is yours. You didn’t steal them.” He raised his hands in surrender.

Auri was sure her heart skipped a few beats.

“What is mine is yours too.” She got on tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his lips.

**

Auri felt almost bubbly the next day, Ethan’s words playing over and over in her head. 

“You’re all sunshine and rainbows.” Tom said by way of greeting.

“I am, last night was really lovely.” Auri kissed Tom’s cheek before going inside the cafe where they’d met to order a cappuccino and breakfast.

Tom followed her and ordered food and coffee for himself too before the two sat down outside, each lighting a cigarette.

“It’s really refreshing seeing you this lively and happy.” Tom spoke after a moment.

“Things are finally aligning and the heaviness is lifting, I almost can’t believe it at times.” 

“You went through a lot, Auri. I think it’s a normal reaction to be disbelieving at times.” 

“I think it is too.” Auri took a drag from the cigarette. 

“So what is going on besides Ethan making you so happy?” 

“Well, the apartment is feeling more and more homey with each day which is something I’ve longed for ever since I moved out on my own. My old place might have seen me grow up but it never felt like home. It felt just like an apartment, like a storage space. This place feels like home and I actually enjoy spending time there and having people over.” 

“You have no idea how much relief your words bring.” Tom spoke softly.

Auri smiled.

“I signed up for a writing club and for a book club too, you know.” 

“That does not mean that my early access to your works is revoked, I hope?” 

“Of course you’ll still have access.” 

“And the smut better not stop flowing. I am loving the book recommendations.” 

Auri laughed at that.

“I am sure you are.” 

“Did you make Ethan read your favourites yet?” 

“No, not yet. Did you try those poses from your favourite with Thomas?” 

Tom grinned.

“I never kiss and tell.”

**

The moments when Ethan could roam around Rome without being noticed were rare and few in between but he appreciated every single one of them. Those were fragments of old normalcy that he sometimes missed even though he was off the grid whenever they had time off and people usually respected his privacy.

But he had a mission - to get Auri’s gifts for their birthday and prepare a nice surprise. It was only one step of the plan, he was still to meet the twins to discuss the limits and the grandeur of the surprise that they would pull off.

“When can we meet?” It was a text from Tom, pulling him away from making the decision on which journal to get, and whether or not to get matching journals for himself and Auri.

“I should be done at the bookshop soon. Maybe give me half an hour? I can meet you in Trastevere?” 

“YOU’RE IN A BOOKSHOP WITHOUT ME????” He could hear Tom’s disappointed tone.

Ethan replied with his live location.

“Was it that hard?” His focus was interrupted by Tom who walked up to him not even fifteen minutes later.

“What?” Ethan grinned and hugged his friend.

“Telling me that we are going book shopping to begin with!” 

“Oh. No, I was just distracted. I want to get Auri everything but for everything to also be perfect.” He admitted shyly.

“May I look through what you’ve selected?” Tom smiled and looked in the basket that Ethan was holding. He saw a few titles that he knew Auri was planning to read, a lovely edition of one of her favourite romance novels and two beautiful journals, one lilac and one black.

“She will love the selection, you did well.” Tom praised.

“Thank you. I want to pick out some things for myself too and we can go grab a coffee after, if you’d like.” 

“Yes, Eli should be finishing work soon and we can pick them up on the way to the cafe and just catch up.” 

“That’s a good plan. So, how have you been doing?” Ethan looked at his friend for a moment, whose smile only widened while picking some of the same books that were chosen for Auri as their book tastes ran similarly.

“I am really happy. I was worried if moving back to Rome would be the right decision for me but I am glad I came back. Being closer to my parents and this new thing with Thomas, it’s really bringing me joy. And Eli and Auri both being here also adds so much joy to my life.” 

“I was worried about you, you know?” Ethan admitted.

“Why?”

“Well, for a while you and Thomas were going back and forth but not really taking action, or so it seemed, and I worried that you’ll end up with your heart broken.” Ethan explained.

“That’s… that’s very kind of you.” Tom squeezed the drummer’s arm.

“I love Thomas but that doesn’t mean that you are not important to me too.” Ethan smiled in return.

“You’re important to me too, Eth and I can’t tell you how relieving it is for me to see you happy and with one of the most important people in my life.” 

Ethan blushed at the mention of Auri.

“You’re so cute, really.” Tom teased.

“She is becoming a very important person in my life, you know?” Ethan admitted shyly, knowing that his words would stay with Tom until he was ready to talk to Auri.

“I can tell. Eli is very protective of Auri and so am I, but I feel like she is safe with you and you have brought her so much happiness that I can only thank you.” 

“She has brought me joy too.” 

“I can tell.”

Ethan inhaled deeply, looking at the now small pile of journals that he’d added to the book stack in his basket. 

“I should stop.”

“No, you shouldn’t.” Tom joked.

“I really should.” Ethan chuckled.

**

The closer that time ticked to her birthday, the more unease she felt, and the more she wanted to shut off the parts of herself that she felt were too vulnerable. 

Aurora’s phone lit up with yet another notification that was trying to pull her away from the world she had immersed herself in.

“I am taking you shopping.” She glimpsed Tom’s words and her focus went completely away as she picked up the phone.

“Why?” 

“Since when do you need an explanation for shopping?”

“Is it book shopping?” 

“No.” 

“Then why are we going shopping?”

“Because your birthday is coming and we need to get you an outfit for the party.”

“Tom…”

“No arguments. Consider it my birthday gift.” 

“Fine, when do you want to go?” 

“Now? Unless you’re busy?”

She considered it for a moment, knowing that getting out of the house would be the wise decision but also not really feeling it. 

“I have to get ready.” 

“Just let me in, I’m outside.” 

She pressed the button that opened the outside door and opened the door of the apartment.

“You really should give me a set of keys.” Tom said as a way of greeting.

“I really should, yes.” Auri hugged him tightly and held on for a moment.

“What’s wrong?” Tom held her even tighter when she wasn’t letting go.

“I am not sure, I think it might just be an off-day but thank you for coming when you did.” 

“You are my best friend, and we are both getting used to being in the same city and it’s really nice to be able to see you and hug you whenever I want, you know?”

Auri nodded, a tear rolling down her face. 

“I love my new life, I love the way it’s all coming together, but fuck I am overwhelmed.” 

“I know, tesoro. I know. But you are doing so well.” He got a strand of hair away from her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead. 

“I don’t think I am capable of going shopping. Not right away.” Auri sniffled.

“That’s okay. Can I stay? I don’t want to leave you right now.” 

“Please stay.” 

The two moved to the sofa and Auri curled up, her head resting on Tom’s lap.

“You’re like a cat.” 

Auri sniffled again.

“Is it the birthday blues hitting you hard, tesoro?”

“I think so. I talked in therapy about it and my therapist gave me useful advice but I am still overwhelmed. I mean, we are what - eight to ten people, just the closest circle? I am terrified.” 

“You know that nothing bad will happen.” 

“I know but the anxiety is making me spiral. It’s making me freeze and I need to start planning this so it doesn’t turn into a last minute shitshow.”

“Can I take something off your plate? Or just keep you company?”

Auri lifted her head and looked at her best friend.

“Will you?” Tears started coming back.

“Of course.” 

“But I already refused earlier… I told Ethan that I want to plan it.”

“He will understand. As long as you’re okay, I am sure he will understand. Plus, he is really excited about celebrating you.”

“He is?” 

“Yes. But I am not telling you more.”

Auri smiled a little.

“I am not going to push you but I think some shopping might cheer you up and we can go by the bookstore later.” Tom offered.

Auri looked at him.

“And get gelato?”

“And get gelato.” 

She sat up slowly and kissed his cheek.

“Thank you for taking care of me.”

“Of course, kid.”

Her phone buzzed with an incoming call when she was getting up.

“Hi sunshine.” She smiled, picking up Ethan’s call.

“Hi tesoro. How is the day going?” 

“Mostly okay, I am about to go get ready to do some shopping with Tommy. How are rehearsals?”

“That’s why I am calling, rehearsals are going to be running late because some people overslept and we had a long lunch in the break.”

“Oh. Hopefully they won’t run too late.”

“I hope so too, but I am calling so you don’t worry.”

“Thank you, amo. Text me if anything changes, okay?” 

“I will. Have the best time with Tommy and I’ll see you soon.” 

“Good, have good rehearsals!” 

She hung up and looked at Tom, not saying a word, just smiling.

“What?”

“I am falling more and more each day.”

“I know.” 

Tom knocked on the bedroom door some minutes later, and saw Aurora sitting on the floor doing her makeup, already dressed.

“Just checking on you.”

“I am okay. Will you grab dinner with me?” 

“It will be my pleasure. Eli and Angie are busy at the office, so it’s just you and me.”

“They can come next time.” Auri added the finishing touch of her makeup.

“You look beautiful.” Tom complimented. Auri was wearing a black dress with a small bag, her hair pinned out of her face and her makeup was simple but the red lipstick tied it all together.

“Thank you.” She smiled. 

“Ready to go?”

“Yes, but let’s take a picture first.”

The two posed in front of the mirror in the corridor, Tom towering over Auri and looking very similar to her with his black pants and black bedazzled shirt, his black and blue hair slicked as well. The bedazzling of his shirt and gold elements and he wore his favourite green and gold bracelet.

“You look like Loki.” Auri giggled.

“I will take that as a compliment.”

“It is one.” She took a few pictures before sending one to Ethan and one to Eli and putting the phone away in her purse.

“I’m really glad we get to do this.” Tom took her hand as they walked outside.

“I’m really glad too. It finally feels like I can breathe, you know?”

Her words hurt his heart and he pulled her in for a hug in the middle of the sidewalk. 

“Nothing bad will ever happen to you again.” He promised quietly, still holding her.

“We don’t know that.” Auri argued, swallowing away the tears that were threatening to ruin her makeup.

“Even if shit hits the fan, we’ll take care of you.”

“I know. I will take care of you too.” Auri promised in turn.

He kissed her forehead again before letting go. 

**

“I know that three of you Kens are all lovey-dovey and honeymooning and everything but I really want you to get yourselves together so we can finish rehearsing and go home at a decent hour.” Vic insisted after Damiano fucked up the lyrics of one of their songs and stopped the whole song from frustration.

“Okay, Barbie.” Thomas chuckled.

“No cigarette breaks until we get at least three songs perfect.” Vic insisted.

“Now, that’s rude and uncalled for.” Thomas frowned.

“And no phones until the next cigarette break, Ethan.” Vic added, seeing that Ethan had already picked up his phone.

“Just one second!” He put his drumstick down and typed quickly “you look exquisite” before sending it and locking his phone again. 

“We need to get our shit together.” Damiano also put his phone away.

“Yes, we do, otherwise we’ll end up sleeping here and you three will probably pine the night away.” 

“Okay, then. Less talking, more playing.” Thomas clapped his hands.

“Watch him not make any mistakes now.” Damiano grinned as music started filling the room again.

It was almost midnight when they finished rehearsals. His hands were sore from playing and he was sweaty and tired. 

“You look like you could use some sleep.” Damiano told his friend.

“I just want to figure out which house I am going to.”

“You’ll be so glad when you stop playing the game of going back and forth between the apartments.” Damiano patted Ethan’s shoulder.

“I know but it has to be the right time.” 

“True.” Damiano lit a cigarette. 

“I got you dinner and I can meet you at your apartment in a bit if you’d prefer to go home today.” Auri typed in the chat. 

“Thank you, tesoro. I will meet you at my apartment, I’m leaving the studio now.” He typed back before looking at Damiano. 

“Don’t you always go on about how home is where the heart is?” He teased his friend, lighting a cigarette of his own.

“I don’t always go on about it, but you know it’s right or you’ll figure it out soon enough.” Damiano winked.

“I think I am starting to see the meaning behind your words.” Ethan admitted, inhaling deeply.

“I can only be happy for you.” Damiano smiled.

“Thank you.”

Ethan got out of Damiano’s car not that long after, and sure enough, Auri was waiting outside. 

“Did you wait long?” He kissed her very gently.

“No, Tom just dropped me off.” She smiled and hugged him with one arm, the other holding the bag with the food. 

“Did you two have a nice day together?” He started unlocking the doors to his apartment.

“Yes, we did some shopping and had dinner and gelato, and then I realised that you’ll probably be hungry by the time rehearsals are over so we went to get a snack and get you some dinner, as well as dinner for Thomas and then you texted and Tommy drove me here before going to see his boyfriend.” Auri followed Ethan inside.

“You are saving me right now.” He kissed her again once they got into the apartment.

“I wouldn’t want you to starve.” She smiled and kissed him again and again.

“I missed you today and Vic bullied us because we were all distracted.”

“I missed you too. But I am glad we are together now.” Auri said as Ethan reached to get the bag of food and winced as his hand cramped. Auri noticed it immediately.

“Go and wash up, I’ll set the table and then I’ll take care of you.” She stole another kiss before going to the kitchen, and for a second he was stunned by her words, something warming in his chest before he did as they’d said.

Auri got the pasta she’d ordered for him plated and got two glasses with ice tea on the table for the two of them. 

“Are you in a lot of pain?” She asked as soon as he got to the kitchen.

“No, it’s just a bit annoying. I’ll put on cream later and it should pass by the morning, don’t worry.”

She gave him a look that he knew meant of course, i’ll worry and smiled before sitting down. 

“Thank you again for taking care of me.” 

“It’s my pleasure.” Auri lit a cigarette. 

“How did shopping go?” He asked between bites.

“We got some stuff, Tom wanted to get my birthday gifts even though I assured him twenty times that he didn’t need to get anything. So we bought clothes and books and it ended up being nice.”

“I am glad to hear it was nice.” He smiled and wiped his mouth on a napkin.

“Where is this cream you use?” Auri asked as he started cleaning up after himself. 

“In my room, on the nightstand.”

“I’ll get it.” 

“I need to shower first. Today was sweaty.” 

“That’s hot.” Auri grinned.

“Want to join me? We could save on some water?”

“That sounds ideal actually.” She agreed. 

**

Ethan could hear the noise out on the street, even though it wasn’t too loud. He knew that dawn neared with every passing minute and he didn’t regret staying up, despite the exhaustion, just to spend some time with Auri. 

She had taken care of his hands and the rest of his upper body and he’d held her as she whispered about the ideas that were running through her head about stories that she needed to tell.

He carefully turned on his side and put his hand on her waist, gently enough not to wake her. “You're a dream I didn't know I had and a dream I hope I can keep around forever.” He said quietly before kissing her bare shoulder and slowly drifting off to sleep as well. He held her the entire night.

----

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[ykaaaras]

ykaaaras masterlist

Writing:

THE PREACHER * In process *

Damiane X Ethany (Damiano David x Ethan Torchio) Alternate Universe - Gender Changes * Currently working on *

*Both of these works are multichapter, my mind can't generate short stories :,) *

Art:

Drawings of Damiano

My older art you can find HERE