#damn not this rich fucking asshole with his fucking gadgets again

[smallfan97]

Smallville season 11 #3

[mikeellee]

Let's talk more about Kudou - the fucking idiot commander - who's bright idea to save Japan in THE LAST OFA USER is to Kamikaze himself and sacrifice OFA to Shig?

...Ummm what? Am I meant to buy this guy commanded anyone?! 🤣😂🤣

He must have killed his whole squadron then if his plans are normally this level of idiocy.

All this realistically would do is power up Shig even more to make him UNSTOPPABLE and in the process doom both Izuku with Japan as a whole.

Hi @doodlegirl1998

Ok, first let´s all agree here Hori just wants to end this damn manga. So before I go into detail about this shit show, let´s talk about one good thing he did: He was nice to Yoichi. No, there was no gain for Kudou to be nice to Yoichi he did bc yes...granted maybe Kudou was bad to Yoichi in some form and we didn´t see, however, he can´t match AFO. He didn´t even know about ofa so him saving Yoichi was selfless.

That is his only good trait. He was nice to Izu 2.0

Now, let´s shit on this moron: He held a grudge against Izu for no reason, and some people TRY to justify "Ah ha DFO" which first off, Kudou was killed 200 years ago...how HE would know IZU IS AFO´S SON? Which btw, Izu is not AFO´s son and makes the whole justification lame ...this fandom will go beyond to protect any Bakugou, hm?

This MF wanted to buff with a kid who is fighting something WAY beyond his pay raise. Never mind how this MF refuses to work with the only hope to end AFO...for reasons (even if DFO became real, I don´t think his defenders realize how this makes him pathetic "He is fighting with a kid who has no idea of who is his father" like, my guy, Kudou and BRUCE is being incredibly stupid by beffing with Izu, regardless if afo is his dad or not. Again, fandom stop trying to defend this bozo)

It´s so unfair Izu to be saddled with the second coming of BK. Look, while BK may not be related to Kudou bc "AFO MURDER HIS ENTIRE FAMILY AND ALL WOMEN KUDOU EVEN SAID HI" I do think they are related spiritually, which honestly? This makes it worse.

Now, why Kudou start a revolution against AFO? The fandom preaches "EVIL EMPIRE" But no one ever talked about it, which if his empire was SO EVIL...I think we could see echoes of it. NOPE. All we see is AFO killing people (BAD, let me make clear it´s bad)but most of his killings seem to be out of the moment. Like, I know people want to see AFO like this smart and manipulative asshole "I killed this random Joe to further my ultimate goal" when in the canon is more like "LOL I´M EVIL"

Like we see AFO in a penthouse, for sure he killed people to get the penthouse, but while IS BAD, could this action result in LE REVOLUTION? Like, imagine if Kudou is rich and AFO random killed makes Kudou lose his money it´s a fair reason to hate him...but KUDOU HAS AN ARMY. Why do people follow him? Did AFO kill their loved ones and or steal money?

Hori: BK is the best in all forms.

Kudou didn´t get a single win! He was murdered by AFO, couldn´t protect Yoichi...and FOR SURE PEOPLE WERE MURDER UNDER HIS COMMANDER.

Now, his plan is to give his quirk to SHIG...Bc OFA has all suicidals morons (Nana included, sorry) and Izu is saddled with this(a choice Hori made, remember Chapter 1?) that wants to Kamizake, don´t forget En wanted to be the sacrifice bc Smokescreen is a useless quirk (I agree, hence why in my fic I want to change his quirk, I feel a smokescreen is smth Mei could create with her gadget)

The idea is to fight Shig inside Shig...So Izu, rip your shirt sexily and look like a demon...you will have sex now!

Bc apparently Shig has a hate feeding him, literally. He has a lump on his head...(Star is touched by Baby Tenko´s sadness...I mean, she doesn´t know Shig is Tenko so this makes sense) This makes me think of cancer or tumor....and Izu needs to fight Shig inside Shig...All this is based on a moron´s plan who has no INFO TO BASE THIS DECISION.

Remember when Izu analyzed quirks, he stopped bc IT WAS CREEPY (insert bemused emoji) and now we have Bk3 doing this, and Izu going ok with this. HE IS GIVING UP HIS QUIRK BC BK3 SAID SO (this is equally bad if Izu had given ofa to Bk)

I made jokes on the server about Izu and Shig having sex...but I still hate the chapter.

Also demon!Izu looks like Tanjirou from Demon Slayer.

[garpie64]

11 with sladejay? If you feel like?

Naughty Little Maid

This had to be the worst undercover mission ever. Jason hated everything; from the constant sexual harassment to the damn slutty outfit. He should have known something was up when Tim came to him with a new gadget to bribe for his help on a case. He should have questioned, but the shiny new Bat toy distracted him. Now here he was; dressed in this tight-fitting frilly pathetic excuse for a maid uniform cleaning some drug lord wannabe’s penthouse.

Damn alpha prick. Jason spent more time dodging unwanted advances than doing his actual job.

At least it was coming to an end. The bastard had left for some big party which meant Jason could snoop around and finally get the info Tim needed. The sooner he could get out of here and this damn dress the better. Getting into the locked study was routine. The idiot rarely remembered to actually lock it and besides, Jason could pick his way out of Bat grade handcuffs. A simple door lock was nothing. Jason stepped into the modern office decorated in art and décor that could probably pay a few months' rent. Ridiculous what some rich men spent their money on.

His heels clipped as he walked across the marble floor. He made his way to the desk where his idiot of an employer left a mess of files and papers. His laptop sat open as well along with a glass of liquor half empty. No wonder the fool had been even more careless. He was no doubt drunk by the time he stumbled out. Jason rolled his eyes at the cliché of it all and leaned over the desk to look at the mess. Some of it was nonsense or useless, but most seemed important.

Jason hit the jackpot. Shipments, product, buyers and sellers, it was all here. The alpha really was a complete idiot. How had he managed to gain any power like this?

Focused so intently on his finds and so secure in being alone, Jason allowed his awareness to lax. He never noticed Deathstroke standing behind him in the doorway. The mercenary paused, a grin spreading across his face. He hadn’t been expecting quite a splendid view. He leaned against the door frame; crossed his arms over his chest; and raked his eyes over long legs covered in pristine white stockings and lace. The skirt was laughably short, barely covering the omega’s ass when Jason stood up. The stiff ruffles of it had the skirt standing up with Jason bent over the desk.

It gave an unobstructed view of the tight lace panties clinging to the omega’s form. Slade’s eye traced along the line of thick thighs up to the lace curved tightly around a plump ass all on show for anyone who walked in.

Slade had incredible self-control. It was something he was well known for. He controlled every nerve in his body, had restraint others dreamed off. He wasn’t one to fall for simple temptations like the common alpha thug. He didn’t drool over a busty woman or chase down the first omega to crook a finger. He wasn’t a young volatile alpha anymore. He had matured. An omega dressed scantily in a sexy maid outfit wouldn’t deter him from his contract.

But his omega dressed in a sexy maid outfit and bent over a desk was a different thing entirely.

As silently as he entered, Slade made his way over to the distracted omega only making a noise when he was close enough to grip Jason’s hips. Jason jumped swallowing a yelp as he bolted up. The hands on his hips squeezed. He knew that armor at his back intimately. Slade had a habit of sneaking up on him.

“Slade,” Jason hissed looking over his shoulder at Deathstroke’s mask.

Slade hummed. “And why exactly is my mate here dressed up all prettily for some upstart?”

“I’m undercover, asshole.”

Slade hummed again. Jason another short yelp when Slade yanked him back against him; the alpha’s hard groin pressing against his ass. That got a growl out of Jason.

“Now isn’t time to fool around.”

Slade lifted one hand, trailing it up the delicate fabric of the dress to the low cut bodice. He got another growl when slipping a finger against the bare skin of Jason’s cleavage. He ignored it, trailing his gloved fingers up along his collarbone and enjoying the shiver when he cupped his hand around Jason’s throat.

Slade lowered his mouth to his mate’s ear. “Your employer won’t be making it back for a few hours.”

Jason shuddered against him. He closed his eyes; let out a breath; and pressed his palms against Slade’s thighs. His hips started moving on their own, grinding his ass back against the alpha. It was more of a tease considering Slade could barely feel him through the armor, but it worked all the same. Jason fluttered his lashes and bit his bottom lip all in an effort to taunt his mate which seemed to work. The grip around his throat tightened with the low growl rumbling from Slade’s throat.

It was easy to break out of the alpha’s hold. Jason simply twisted to face him, staring up into the mask with that devilish grin. His hands slid up unforgiving armor, tapping his fingers against the kevlar. Jason cocked his head, a glint of mischief in his eyes. He trailed his hands up behind his mate’s head hooking his arms around Slade’s neck and leaning up on his toes. Kissing the mask where Slade’s mouth would be was just mocking him.

“Kid,” Slade growled low. His voice was a mix of arousal and irritation.

Jason pulled back, an actual giggle falling from his lips as his eyes squeezed closed in mirth. He gazed at Slade through sultry eyes. “Let me make it up to you.”

Slade watched as Jason slid down his body and settled on his knees. Those taunting fingers found the hidden catches in Deathstroke’s armor. The low mix of a hiss and growl pulled a smirk across Jason’s face when he slipped his hand into his mate’s suit. Slade was already rock hard when Jason got his hand on his cock. Jason groaned himself and freed Slade from the confines of his armor. The alpha’s cock stood long and thick. Precum dripped from the swollen head filling the air with the heady scent of musk.

It also drowned the lesser alpha’s scent Jason realized distantly.

With heavy lids, Jason felt himself drool over the impressive cock standing proud before him. Any omega would drool over it. Ducking his head, Jason pressed a rather chaste kiss to the base of Slade’s cock. He made his way slowly, tortuously up along the shaft pressing whispers of kisses along Slade’s skin. Slade groaned. He buried his hand in curly hair, giving a slight tug to egg Jason on. The omega just smirked against his shaft, kissing the very tip of his cock before flicking his eyes up to meet Slade’s.

“What’s the matter, Alpha?” Jason teased gripping the base of Slade’s cock and giving him a squeeze. “You said we have time.”

Slade tightened his grip in Jason’s hair, tugging enough to tilt his omega’s head back. “I don’t have patience.”

Jason huffed and rolled his eyes, but the smile remained. Slade dragged his head against his cock pointedly. Jason lapped at his dripping head, tongue delving into the slit briefly before letting his lips part and swallowing down Slade’s cock. The alpha groaned, head dropping back briefly before rolling back to watch Jason’s slow but steady descent. He kept his grip on the omega’s hair light allowing Jason to move his head. He watched Jason bob his head along his shaft getting Slade wet as Jason swallowed him down.

Slade tightened his grip to prevent Jason from moving. The omega let out a questioning sound but didn’t protest. The first thrust was light and shallow and Jason dropped his jaw and relaxed his throat in response. The next thrust went deeper. Jason moaned around the cock pushing into his mouth. His eyes fell closed and he settled his hands on Slade’s hips. Slade gripped his head thrusting leisurely into that hot wet mouth. Jason swallowed once before completely giving in. He could feel the stretch in his jaw. His tongue was pressed down with the wide girth sliding over it. Tears formed in his eyes when he felt Slade push into his throat.

It was a testament to how often Jason swallowed his cock that his throat opened so easily. Jason settled into it, keeping himself lax and pliant while the cock drove down his throat and periodically blocked his airway. Saliva built up in his mouth with his inability to swallow. It coated Slade’s cock and dropped from his chin.

“Look at you, so filthy.” Slade rumbled. He combed his fingers through black locks. “What kind of maid are you making such a mess?”

Jason moaned. His throat fluttered around the intrusion earning a groan from Slade as the alpha’s hips jerked further. Jason choked as Slade forced his cock deeper. Squeezing his eyes closed and with his face pressed against Slade’s pelvis, Jason focused on staying calm and relaxed while Slade held him in place, grinding his hips. The lack of air made his eyes water, but Jason didn’t protest. He swallowed around Slade’s cock and listened to the dirty praise falling from his mate’s mouth.

When Slade finally pulled back slow and easy, Jason gasped for air. He fell to his hands coughing. His throat stung and his voice was no doubt wrecked. Slade didn’t move, just simply watched Jason recover. He didn’t wait long. Jason yelped as he was yanked up and promptly deposited on the desk, knocking some files and something expensive by the sound of the crash. He looked up at the impassive Deathstroke mask still very much breathless. Slade grabbed a leg and yanked him closer to the edge of the desk. The panties were promptly ripped off leaving Jason both naked and lamenting the ruined silks. He didn’t have long to sit on it before being spread wide and Slade slammed home.

“Fuck!” Jason screeched falling back against the desk. Throwing his head back, his nails racked across the surface leaving gouges in the wood. He heard Slade chuckle over him and vowed to get his revenge but for now, he was too busy being overwhelmed by the massive dick impaling him at the moment. “Shit, you asshole.”

Slade hummed. His gloved hand swept up Jason’s thigh sending shivers down when rough leather teased skin. The other hand settled on his hip in a bruising grip. It was all the warning Jason got before Slade pulled out and slammed home. It punched another yelp from his throat. Slade showed no mercy. His hips slammed hard into his omega, cock spearing through and punching the air from Jason’s lungs. The pace was grueling and brutal, but absolutely everything Jason loved. His nails dug into the wood or scratched uselessly at Slade’s armor. Eventually, he settled on gripping Slade’s wrist holding his hips.

With each thrust, Jason bounced along the surface of the desk. Slade alone held him in place with fingers digging into plump flesh and leaving possessive bruises. Slade’s knot teased against Jason, threatening to stretch him wide and denying him at the same time. The air was thick with sex and arousal. Jason could taste it on his tongue along with the musk of his mate. He wanted it bad. Bringing his free leg up, Jason dragged Slade closer. The alpha obliged, releasing his grip to brace against the desk with Jason’s one leg still trapped over his shoulder.

The following moan was porn worthy with how Jason arched, fingers curling against chest armor. His toes curled. His eyes rolled into the back of his head. He was close, so damn close and Slade continued to string him along by grinding short and deep but not knotting him.

Jason growled low, baring his teeth at his mate. “Fucking knot me already, you ass.”

Slade’s grin was feral though Jason couldn’t see. Without an answer, he slammed hard enough to cause Jason to jolt. The omega’s mouth fell open in a broken gasping moan. Jason’s whole body locked up in ecstasy with his climax rocketing through him. Slade groaned at the feeling of Jason’s body milking his cock, squeezing his knot. He couldn’t resist. Jason moaned as Slade came, coating his walls and driving his cum deeper with each aborted thrust.

It took almost ten minutes for the two to regain their breath and come back to earth. Slade pulled back from where he had slumped against Jason nearly crushing the omega. It was times like that that made Jason grateful for his size. He loved feeling his mate’s weight on him like any omega, but Slade was big even for an alpha. Slade smirked as he realized Jason was so out of it he didn’t realize he was purring.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, kid.” Slade mused.

That got the omega’s attention. Jason’s eyes snapped open wide and almost panicked. “Fuck, it’s Valentine’s Day already? Shit! This case was supposed to be wrapped up already!”

“Luckily it seems you’ve just made a big break and your brother can take care of the arrest while you have dinner with your mate.” Slade mused.

Jason dropped his head back against the desk with a sigh. “You know, it’s supposed to be dinner first and then sex.”

Slade simply laughed. “Well, we can certainly have sex after dinner too.”

“We better.” Jason growled. "But dinner first."

[erintoknow]

bigger than the sound

fallen hero fanfiction chargestep and intrigue ~3k words [ao3]

title taken from [Cheated Hearts by Yeah Yeah Yeahs]

–––

“Thanks for coming with me,” Ortega whispers from the corner of her mouth.

“Of course, thanks for inviting me.” A smile flits across Jane’s face as she studies the mess of an abstract portrait hanging on the wall in front of them. “Hopefully no super villains crash this party.”

Ortega laughs, uneasy, as she rubs the back of her neck. “Anyone that does is going to regret it.”

Jane arches an eyebrow as you try to keep her from smiling. In the aftermath of the Gala fiasco, security has tripled in order to keep the city’s elite feeling safe. The Mayor’s Guardian force was milling around here somewhere, ready to jump into duty in a split second. For the Rangers, beside Ortega, Jane has seen Herald milling around somewhere and it wouldn’t surprise you if either Argent, or Steel, or both had been bullied into attending.

The Mayor needed to prove to her benefactors she was worth keeping in office. The Rangers needed to prove they were worth keeping in Los Diablos.

Taking them all head-on as Banshee would be a pointless suicide.

Lucky for you then, Ortega still owed Jane a second date.

No explosives this time. No dramatic fights. No terrible mistakes with people screaming and blood everywhere and emergency rooms filling up. Going to do this right. Going to do this quiet. The bastards won’t realize the damage until it’s too late.

“Charge! How’re you holding up?”

Jane and Ortega turn together to find Herald walking towards them. It’s a little strange seeming him in a tuxedo again. All crisp angles and sharp features. He raises an arm to wave and you think Jane spies a glimpse of blue sleeve from a Ranger skinsuit underneath. Well, that confirms what you suspected from the Gala. Wonderbread really is ready to throw-down at a moment’s notice.

Is Ortega? She’s in a suit this time instead of a dress. Easier to fight in?

Ortega waves back at Herald with a smile. “Haven’t throttled anyone yet, how about you?”

Herald takes Ortega’s hand and pulls her into a quick hug. “Oh, this is old hat to me. I just focus on the art, and see how many fancy hors d’oeuvres I can sneak before anyone notices.” Ortega laughs and Jane politely covers her mouth to hide the smile. He shifts his gaze down to Jane and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “Sides–?” He flinches and shakes his head. “Wait, no?”

Jane keeps her face blank. Sidestep? Sidestep who? Never heard of the bitch.

There is a tense silence and then Ortega breaks it with a forced laugh. “Sorry, this is my friend Jane I was telling you about.” She gestures towards you and then from you to Herald. “And Jane, this is Herald, but you probably already knew that.” More forced laughter.

“Sorry,” Herald rubs at his knee, “you just reminded me of someone.” He shoots Ortega a curious look.

Was it too late now to go back and dye Jane’s hair? You idiot. You stupid vain idiot. All the more reason to keep your two lives separated. Why did you have to go and get Jane involved with Ortega? Moron. Fool. Buffoon.

Jane keeps her face a careful blank. “It’s… nice to meet you too, Mr. …?”

Herald smiles, awkward. “Just Herald is fine. Nice to meet you, Jane.” He doesn’t offer a hand to shake.

When Ortega and Herald descend into small talk Jane breaths a small sigh of relief and politely detaches herself from the conversation. A few tense moments, but it had at least bought you some needed freedom from Ortega. Time to get to work then.

“Excuse me, folks, I’m just gonna duck into the restroom real quick.”

Ortega nods, “You know where it is?”

“I’ll figure it out. I’ll see you at the shrimp bar, sweetie.” Jane winks at Ortega, a smirk spreading across her face at the slight color on the hero’s face. Still got her.

Your sense of direction as Jane isn’t as strong as Ariadne’s but enough time spent studying floor plans makes up for it. Weave through the crowd, past the buffet table. The further from the food and the booze Jane gets the less people in ritzy outfights milling around being offensively rich.

There, next to the restrooms, a side entrance for the gallery. A very bored looking cop stands next to the door, watching the guests. 

Mustering up all the elitist disdain she can muster, Jane approaches the door and gives the cop a dismissive glance. “I’m taking a smoke break.” The man frowns but otherwise doesn’t stop Jane as she steps through the door, pretending to fish through her purse. Perfect.

Outside, the street gives a clear view to the Hero Museum just down the block. Once again closed for renovation and repair. The dumb bastards. Maybe you’ll trash the next grand opening too. Keep it up until they get the idea.

It doesn’t take long to spot her. The woman pacing back and forth down the sidewalk, staring anxiously at her phone, purse hanging loose in the crook of her arm. Jane whispers to get her attention and when that doesn’t work progressively raises her voice. “Hey! Ochoa!”

She looks up, sags in relief and hurries over to Jane, her movements stiff and awkward in the tight black and gold floral dress. “Finally! I was about to call the whole thing off.”

“Do you want your dirt or not?” Jane hisses. 

“Please, Jane.” Mia Ochoa’s frowns, “I’m an investigative journalist, not a tabloid columnist.”

“Sure, whatever.” Jane glances up and down the street. She keeps a hand in her purse, fingering the gadget from Dr. Mortum that should be disrupting the video cameras. How long did the charge last for again? Five minutes? “Sit tight, I need to get the pig out of the way first.”

“You’re not going to–?”

Jane snorts, “I’m not going to hurt anybody. I’m not stupid.” She tilts her head, thinking. “Well. I’m probably not going to hurt anybody.” She shakes her head and holds up a hand. “Whatever, wait here. This’ll only take a second.”

“Ugh,” Jane contorts her face into a visage of barely contained fury as she steps back inside. “I can’t believe some people.”

The cop sighs, “There a problem, Ma’am?”

A short bark of a laugh. “Problem?” Jane glowers down the hallway. “Yeah, there’s a fucking problem.”

“There’s no need for that kind of language, Miss Smith.”

Jane snarls, “Tell that to the asshole who can’t keep his hands to himself.”

That gets the cop’s attention. “Again, is there something I can help you with, Ma’am.”

Jane holds her breath. You’re about to do something really shitty. Oh well. Sorry Kieth, it’s for the greater good. “Yeah, alright.” Jane sighs, avoiding the cop’s gaze. “someone ought to teach that damn waiter at the cocktail bar some manners. I’m not the only woman either he’s harassed tonight. The ass.”

The man’s eyes narrow. “I’ll see someone talks to him.” He puts a hand up to the walkie-talkie strapped to his breast pocket. Presses the button. Jane holds her breath. “Hey, Sam? I got a woman here reporting a problem with one of the help.”

The cop frowns as no one answers.

“Sam? You there?” No response. “Kim? José?”

Jane crosses her arms, and taps her foot. “I thought you said you’d take care of it.”

He shakes his head, “Something’s wrong with my damn walkie.” He taps it one more time and shakes his head. “Goddamn this garbage keeps busting. Sorry miss, I’ll have to find my superior.” He shoots Jane a glance, eyeing her up and down. “In the meantime, use some common sense.”

Jane huffs, as the cop walks off, grumbling about equipment.

Honestly, you half expected that not to work. Thank you, Dr. Mortum.

A quick glance around to check for any other eyes and you step back to hold the door open. “Alright Ochoa, you’re in.”

“Finally.” The reporter quickly steps inside and you let the door close. “I can’t believe I’m really doing this.”

Jane frowns as she digs through her purse again. “Yeah, well, if you want the real meat you gotta go where they don’t want you to be.”

“Oh believe me, I know.”

“Ah, here we go.” Jane pulls out a small laminated pin, holds it up for Ochoa’s inspection. “Your own name pin. It’s like you were supposed to be her all along.”

“Oh!” The woman takes it from Jane’s hand with a look of surprise. “You thought of everything.”

“Don’t jinx it.”

As the two of you walk down the hallway to rejoin the main event Ochoa pins the name tag to her chest and smoothes out her dress. “Alright, well, thanks for getting me in. I can take it from here.”

“Just don’t forget our deal. You owe now.”

The smile fades from Ochoa’s face. “Of course.”

Jane scans the room as the two of you step in. There’s Ortega and Herald still talking in the far corner, and then there’s… “Actually,” a tight smile crosses Jane’s face, “how do you feel about in introduction to the Mayor’s right-hand man?”

Ochoa’s eyes light up, “I’d love it.” She frowns, “But do you think he’ll talk?”

“I think you might be surprised.” Jane grabs Ochoa’s hand, pulling her through the crowd. There we go. Jane raises her free hand in greeting, “Professor Vanderpoel, it’s a pleasure to see you again.”

The balding clerk turns with startled surprise towards Jane, as the other two men in his group stop talking, watching the two approaching women with mild interest. “I’m sorry… do I know you?”

Jane laughs, a bright smile on her face. “Don’t tell me you forgot me already? Tell me you at least remember the linden trees?”

A cascade of color rockets up the man’s face. “That– that was a very different time in my life.”

One of Vanderpoel’s companions laughs and elbows him in the side. “You never told me you used to teach!”

Vanderpoel flinches, “I haven’t for eight years.”

Jane nods, knowingly. “Such a shame what happened! Still I’m so happy to see you’ve bounced back without any problems.”

“Well…”

“Anyway,” Jane cuts him off without mercy, “I was just catching up with my good friend Mia over here,” Jane tugs Mia forward by the arm. “When I saw you over here.”

One of Vanderpoel’s friends tilts his head, “Mia…? You look familiar.”

Ochoa’s smile is strained. “I’m a reporter for LD Confidential.”

Jane laughs, “Don’t worry, she’s not working today.”

Vanderpoel’s two friends laugh with Jane, but Vanderpoel himself has a thoughtful look in his eye. Encouraging. Banshee’s bridge-side chat with the man had been sinking in after all.

The man on the right claps Vanderpoel on the back. “You know some lovely ladies man, I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on us!” A strange look crosses across Vanderpoel’s face and the three men make room for the two of you to join their conversation. You can’t stop the smirk on Jane’s face. You’ve got them.

S u c k e r s.

Not every bomb needs to be literal.

A few more minutes of smalltalk to help work Ochoa into the conversation and then Jane politely excuses herself from the group. She’s got a date to rejoin after all.

Ortega perks up as Jane crosses the room, a glass of wine in each hand. She doesn’t wait to ask before offering Jane one of them. “I was beginning to think you might have ditched me.”

Jane smiles, laughs, as she takes the wine glass. “Sorry, sorry, I saw some people I knew and got distracted.”

“Oh?” Ortega’s focus zeros in on Jane, “Anyone I’d know?”

“Oh, I doubt it.” Jane shakes her head and waves a hand to dismiss the idea. “Just some old college friends. “ She glances about the room, “Herald still around?”

Ortega laughs, “He’s around somewhere. Why?”

“No reason. Just wondering.” Jane sips from her glass. “You have a lot of attractive friends.”

Wait, fuck what? Why did you say that? What the fuck? What happened to that masterclass of infiltration?

Ortega blinks, surprised, then laughs. “I hadn’t pegged you for being into men too.”

Jane glowers up at her. “So what?”

“Hey, it’s fine. I’m bi too.” Ortega smiles, pats Jane on the shoulder, then lets her hand run down the arm.

“You are?” Jane winces, “Ugh, what am I saying, of course you are. Sorry, I’ve apparently lost my mind tonight.”

“I suppose my love life is pretty well documented at this point.” There’s a bitter tinge to Ortega’s voice that catches you by surprise.

“I’m surprised we haven’t shown up in a tabloid yet,” Jane admits.

“The press don’t follow me around like they used to.”

“Miss it any?”

“God no.” Ortega smiles widely, and then the smile quickly fades. “Sometimes I wonder how many relationships it cost me.”

Huh. “Was it that bad?”

“You got out for dinner with one guy and suddenly they’re your boyfriend. After awhile I just kind of embraced it. Especially once I became Marshal. At least I could take some ownership over it that way, you know?”

“I’m… sorry, that sounds pretty rough actually.”

“It’s in the past now.”

Silence threatens to stretch out between you two. Jane coughs, “So… when did you figure out you liked women, then?”

Ortega rubs her neck, “When I figured it out…? Hrm.”

“You don’t have to tell me.”

“No, I’m just… it feels like so long ago, now.” Ortega sighs. “I guess… there was this vigilante…”

Jane holds her breath. No– It couldn’t be, could it? “A vigilante?”

“Well, I had just joined the Rangers properly.” Oh. “This vigilante, Axel. She was this speed boost that worked in the south end of the city. She was Latina too, and we just… kind of hit it off.”

“Wow,” Jane says. You try to wrack you memory for anything about an ‘Axel.’ It’s not ringing a bell. “What ended up happening?”

“It wasn’t easy trying to keep it out of the press. Eventually it got to be too much and we just kind of… mutually broke it off. She retired not long after. Or moved, maybe?” Ortega crosses her arms, thinking. “That’s it, she moved down further south. I haven’t heard from her since.”

“She didn’t want to go public?”

Ortega sighs. “This was like the early aughts. Things were starting to change but…”

Jane frowns. “There would have been consequences.”

“Yeah. I think…” Ortega stares at the floor between the two of you, lost in memory or maybe regret. “I think maybe I had been too pushy. I was under a lot of pressure at the time. The new face of the Rangers. They told me I needed a relationship to look ‘normal.’”

“Human.”

“Yeah,” Ortega laughs, bitter. “That too, I guess. Not that it was an excuse mind.”

“Would a relationship with a woman really of worked for that though?”

“Well, we’ll never know now. I wanted to try but…”

“But?”

“I don’t think I gave her the space to really process what coming out would mean. We just fought about it. A lot.”

Jane rocks back and forth on her heels, avoids looking at Ortega. “That’s rough, I’m sorry.” Ortega never shared this with you – with Ariadne. You’re not sure what that means. How to feel about it. 

“Well, hey,” Ortega looks up, catches Jane’s eye. “I learned from it. Eventually.” She smiles, and Jane smiles back. “Well, I told you my story, what’s yours?”

Jane blinks, bites her lip. “Oh! Uh. Hrm.”

“Sore subject for you too?”

“Uh… not exactly…” Jane laughs while panic runs through your head. “Like… when I figured out I liked guys…?”

“I was thinking more women? Society kind of expects the male interest.”

Jane forces a laugh. “I guess that’s true. I’ve never actually dated a guy though.”

Ortega shrugs, “Doesn’t make you any less bi. Nothing wrong with that.”

“Is it still bi if you don’t want to date guys though?” Jane frowns, looking away. Floor, artwork, the crowd. Anywhere else.

“Oh. Hrm,” Ortega pauses, “I guess that’s up to you? I’m not the sexuality police.” She laughs and Jane finds herself joining in.

“Oh good. I’m safe then. I mean… guys can be… attractive, I guess.” Jane shrugs helplessly, “But… I don’t know. I guess I’m kind of afraid of them?”

“Jane…?” There’s a note of concern in Ortega’s voice, and Jane cringes. This conversation is getting too real.

“This isn’t really the place to talk about it.”

“Okay. I get that. Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” Jane sighs. That is absolutely not a subject you want Ortega to chew on. You need something to distract her. “ As far as women go, well..” You need to think of a story quickly. “There was this… girl I worked with in – in… college.”

“You know,” There’s an impish grin on Ortega’s face, “they say you should never date a co-worker.”

Jane scowls, “Oh believe me, no dating was involved.”

Ortega puts a hand over her mouth. “Oh no! You just pined from afar?”

“Uh… more like, right next to her. For five years.”

“Ouch. She never caught on?”

The pained expression on Jane’s face matches the one in your heart. “I… have no idea?” Jane sighs and downs the rest of her wine glass in one go. “Honestly, I didn’t really… realize what it was I was feeling until years later. And then it was too late.” She shrugs and looks away. Can’t believe this conversation is happening. Have you lost your goddamn mind?

Ortega is shaking her head, equal parts amused and pitying. “I never would have pegged you for the shy type.”

“Hey!” Jane crosses her arms, “not shy enough to keep from kissing you.”

Ortega laughs again, “I’ve noticed.”

“I learned from my mistakes too,” Jane lies.

[ringobean]

Part 2 of my fanfiction, enjoy 😉

A strange New world.

Everyone was slowly starting to realize what was happening, the lads were a little confused and worried. "Don't worry, I'll do everything I can to get you back, it sounds crazy and impossible, but there must be a solution."

my roommates were also a bit confused and shocked by this strange situation.

"Well, I think everyone needs a little explanation, let's go to the living room to discuss to all this quietly "

I invited the boys to sit on the couch, the time to get dressed, and prepare the breakfast. They looked so cute, with their frightened and at the same time amazed glances, to discover all these new gadgets that they didn't know!

As I finished putting on a dress that was a bit more presentable than my mini shorts, which I used as pajamas, I heard a shout from the living room and the sound of the television.

"I pressed this thing and that kind of movie screen came on," George told me with a small voice, "I told you, don't touch anything," replied John.

"You must be rich to have your owne cinema at home, and with all this colours" said Ringo.

"Ahah not at all, everybody's got a television like this in 2019"

"What, is that a telly? woow it's really amazing all this progress" Said Paul.

"And why is there this stripper on your Telly? There are great TV shows in your era," said John with a satisfied smile.

"actually she's not a stripper, but a singer, and these are music videos" said Luna, who was laughing, looking at them, mouths wide open, eyes fixed on the screen with concentration.

"What a dance," says George, amazed

"It's called twerk, welcome in 2019 boys, where our singers look like porn stars, and where we dance half naked rubbing each other, with music that looks like nothing and lyrics who don't want to say anything!"

"I think I'm going to love this era, finally" said John with a big smile on his face.

"In any case the 80's john would have been very disappointed to see our time" while I was serving breakfast.

"why do you talk about the John of the 80s, and not the John of your time, what happens to me in 2019?"

I bit my lip, irritated and sad to have spoken too quickly. My heart was heavy and my eyes filled with tears, I looked in turns at John and George and I couldn't help but burst into tears, "Again, tears," said John, laughing, "seriously what is happening to us in 2019 to cry so much."

"first of all can I give both of you a big hug before answering your question?"

Of course, they said, looking worried about what I was going to reveal to them. I took John and George and hugged them tightly, tears ran down my cheeks, but my heart felt so peaceful to see them in front of me, alive and healthy. Maybe this adventure would change their future and avoid John's death and perhaps even George's death. I sat on the floor facing them, wiping away my tears. "Thanks for that hug, you don't even have a clue of what you did with your music and the impact you had on the world, I realizes the dream of millions fans around the world, who also dreams of hugging you, and seeing you all four in front of them, especially for young fans like me, who haven't had the chance to know you alive, in 2019, only Paul and Ringo remains, who are both wonderful, healthy, almost 80-year-old grand dads, especially Ringo, who looks like a man not even 50 years old, and still doing wonderful concerts and great songs"

I took a deep breath, and I told "John you were shot dead on December 8, 1980, at 40, by a so-called fan in search of notoriety, the whole world mourned your death, you left thousands of inconsolable fans, George, you died of this damn lung cancer, at 58, November 29, 2001, but now that you are here and you know your future, there maybe a chance to change all that on your return.

"damn, why did this man shoot at me" said John in shock.

"was I an asshole with my fans?"

"oh no, that's the sadest part of this story, you signed him an autograph and even took a picture with him just before he killed you, you were really a wonderful artist , close to your fans, this loser is just a big piece of shit"

"woow what a revelation, well I think I'll quickly stop the cigarette in these cases" said george, throat knotted, restraining crying, everyone had tears in the eyes of the emotion, even my roommates who began to understand the situation little by little.

"well I don't give a fuck," Ringo said, lighting a new cigarette, with a mocking laugh to make the situation a bit more humorous and make everyone laugh.

"I'm going to be a sexy grandfather and the girls will continue shouting my name during my show "

"same here", said Paul with a wink, also lighting a cigarette.

"Yes, I said that you'll become sexiest grandfathers, but I forgot to tell you that you will also be great vegetarian sportsmen, and stop drinking and smoking." All 4 started to laugh,

"Us, vegetarians and sportsmen? Ahaha, you must surely confuse us with another band" Ringo laughed to me.

"laugh as much as you want, you'll see by yourself, when you'll tweet peace and love and brocolis emojis, when you'll be 80 years old."

"Tweet, emojis, what is that?" asked Ringo with his beautiful questioning blue eyes, and his sexy voice, damn this man is hot as hell, even more handsome than in all the pictures of him that I stare every day.

I sit next to him to show him and explain to him what is tweeter and emojis. "oh, it's so cute, love" he said, staring straight into my eyes with his beautiful charming smile, I look at him open-mouthed, completely under the charm and blushing.

At the same time, it was time for the news flash on television, and we saw the interview of a scientist living in London, who was working on the project of a machine to travel back in time, I hurry to write down his name on google to find information about him. This man might be able to help us, to bring back the lads at their era.

[octoberdecemberwrites-blog]

It wasn’t Alec Lightwood’s fault—

Or at least that’s what he’d tried to tell his parents, anyway.

The party getting out of hand was maybe Isabelle’s fault—

Maybe even Clary’s—

But it definitely wasn’t his and he didn’t understand why he was the only one being made to pay the price.

The whole thing had started off innocent enough. One of the higher-ups at The Institute wanted to have a simple, Hawaiian themed going away party. Of course, being a popular, upcoming party planner in the Manhattan area, Alec’s name came up as a potential thrower of said party. And of course, because Alec was always looking for the next big party to throw, he’d readily accepted the offer.

The gig was one of the most expensive affairs that Alec had been trusted with to date, clocking in at around $50,000. Everything had been beautifully decorated, too, with a luau being recreated out of a large conference room, including free flowing cosmopolitans and professional dancers in shimmying, grass skirts—

And a goddamn fire pit.

God damn that goddamn fire pit.

It’d seemed like such an innovative idea at the time, bringing that classic, crackling flavor all the way from Hawaii to NYC, keeping that special magic alive that so often comes with relaxing on a beach after a long day of vacationing and sightseeing...

Alec remembered hearing the screams before he saw the flames.

One of the girls in grass skirts desperately hopped over the bar, as she poured mixed drinks right down the front of her outfit, hoping it’d quickly put out the fire. The other hired dancers soon followed her lead, nearly tearing the bar apart as they splashed around in alcohol and beer...

Which only caused the flames to increase.

And in turn, caused the screams to get even louder.

Eventually, the dancers were saved by fire extinguishers, and thankfully no one was severely injured...

Even though Alec’s party planning reputation had completely gone down in flames.

But at the time, Alec didn’t understand how it even happened in the first place. He could so easily recall making at least three rounds around the fire pit, each time asking one of his assistants to make a note to all of the event’s attendees about not standing so close to the fire. It was gorgeous, but it was fire, so while Alec could try his best to contain it, there were no guarantees that it wouldn’t shoot off sparks every now and then.

After the fiasco, Alec had heard through the grapevine that one of the very guests at the event had been encouraging the dancers to position themselves around the fire, since it would make for better photographs and all—

But the only leads Alec had to go on was that the guest was stunning and also a woman.

Apparently, no one had been able to catch their name.

Although, being able to properly place blame on the perpetrator didn’t matter too much to Alec right now. He was too busy focusing on his current plight—

Being forced to work a 9 to 5.

His parents had decided to temporarily cut off his access to their bank account, hoping to sway his interest in party planning and get him on the path to pursuing a “real job in the real world.” Maryse had repeatedly mentioned Izzy’s name as a comparison, wondering why Alec couldn’t get involved with computers or little, digital gadgets like his sister loved to do—

But Alec Lightwood knew that he wasn’t a goddamn nerd.

He was The Pretty Boy Party Planner of NYC, and as soon as his reputation recovered—

And as soon as his dad eventually cracked and gave Alec back his Black Card—

He’d be back to his former, glorious self, planning luxurious parties, getting sloppily day-drunk on margaritas and helping Maia figure out what size Louboutin she wore in US shoe sizes.

Until then, however, he’d resigned himself to his position as Sales Manager at Toys! Toys! Toys!, a store dedicated to brand name play-sets and pricey additions to Barbie’s dream-house. Alec snagged the job due to Jace’s stellar recommendation with the Hiring Department, which included the words “my brother is kind of a gay disaster but he has a good heart...I think.”

I think.

Alec scoffed at the words, even now, as he sorted through a box of detached doll heads.

Of course, he had a good heart.

It wasn’t Alec’s fault that no one had given him the opportunity to prove it to them yet. It was like every guy in Manhattan only wanted sex, sex sex—

As soon as Alec brought up the word relationship they’d pretty much disappear on the spot like a fucking magician.

“Excuse me...um...it’s Alec, right?” The voice came from somewhere behind Alec—

But he already knew who it was.

Magnus Fucking Bane.

The most gorgeous man that Alec had ever seen in his life. Magnus had only been coming into the shop for a few weeks or so, and he seemed particularly interested in any new shipment related to doll parts, dollhouses, doll clothes...

Alec began to wonder if Magnus had a child, some super cute, super spoiled, adorable little brat of a child, who had the privilege of having Magnus as their father...

But Alec hadn’t found the courage to ask Magnus about it yet—

Really, he hadn’t found the courage to ask Magnus about anything, not even to find out if Magnus liked guys or not.

“Hi. Hey. Yeah.” Alec moved away from the objectively creepy box of heads, and turned to face Magnus, directly. “It’s Alec. And it’s...Magnus...right?”

“You remembered.” Magnus offered Alec a bright, warm smile—

And Alec felt like he was going to pass out on the spot. “What brings you in today, Magnus?”

“Oh, just wondering if you got anything new in stock...maybe...something like a doll car? Barbie jeep? Is that what it’s called?”

Alec let out a light laugh, before folding his arms across his chest. “How is it possible that you own basically every Barbie-ish thing known to man and you still don’t know what a Barbie jeep is?”

“Sorry. I’m still kind of...new at this.” Magnus blushed a deep red—

And now Alec felt like a total asshole. “No, I’m the one who should be sorry, Magnus. I’d just assumed that you’ve been buying stuff for your daughter—”

Magnus hastily shook his head. “I don’t have a daughter.”

Oh my God.

Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

He has a son?

He’s been buying doll stuff for his son this whole time?

HE’S SO FUCKING PROGRESSIVE.

YASSSS KING.  FUCK GENDER NORMS.

YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD DADDY.

PLEASE BE MY DADDY, TOO—

“Alec? Are you alright? You just kind of...stopped talking.” Magnus gave Alec a sheepish grin—

And Alec suddenly felt incredibly weak in the knees. Using all of the remaining energy in his body, Alec managed to formulate a response. “We have some new cars in the back. Ooh, there’s a new model that can fit your Barbie and all three of her ethnically diverse friends—”

“My...uh...Barbie...will probably just be riding solo.” Magnus smiled at Alec once again. “But please, lead the way.”

Alec quietly nodded, before nervously heading down a nearby aisle, trying his best not to trip over his own, two feet and fall flat on his face.

************************************************************

“Maiaaaaaaa.” Alec whined, as he plopped down on Maia’s living room couch. “I need helpppppp.”

“Do you actually need help? Or are you just being dramatic?” Maia took a seat beside Alec, her attention still focused on her phone.

“I’m not being dramatic. I am literally dying.” Alec whined again, before nudging Maia in her shoulder. “Magnus is so freakin’ hot. It’s ruining my life.”

“Is this the weirdo who comes in to buy all that Barbie stuff like once a week?”

“He’s not a weirdo! He’s just being a good dad...he’s just a really good daddy—”

“Alec, you know you’re no longer allowed to use that word in my apartment.” Maia finally looked up from her phone. “Not since you used that word to describe Luke. The man who is like my actual father.”

“Oh, boo-hoo, Maia! You’ve got a hot dad!” Alec openly rolled his eyes. “But now that I have your attention...please tell me how to make a boy like me, please, please, please—”

“Just be yourself, and I’m sure he’ll be into it.” Maia grinned, and casually shrugged her shoulders. “Seriously. You’re the most entertaining person I’ve ever met.”

“Maia, I’ve been myself my entire life and I am still single.” Alec groaned under his breath. “Can’t I just be someone else? Someone who Magnus will want to marry immediately?”

“Alec—Oh wait.” Maia’s phone began to chime in her palm, and she swiftly swiped a finger across her screen. “Oh, it’s Simon. He’s just sending me pics from backstage. He’s opening for Maroon 5 tonight.”

“Are you two still a thing? I thought he was dating my sister.”

“He is.”

“...And he’s also...dating you?”

“Yep.” Maia beamed, before setting her phone back in her lap. “It’s 2018, Alec Lightwood. Poly people exist.”

“I know poly people exist, Maia, I just don’t know what you see in Simon Lewis.” Alec scoffed and slightly shifted in his seat. “I think you’re settling. I gave you Jace’s number, didn’t I?”

“Alec, Jace is dating Clary.”

“Oh my God. What?” Alec, exasperated, threw his hands up in the air. “Everybody’s fucking everybody! Except me! Everybody is fucking and no one is fucking me!”

“Stop complaining. You’re white. And hot. And rich. Just get back on Grindr. Duh.” Maia reached for the TV remote, which had been resting on the table in front of the couch.

“I can’t go back to Grindr. I saw Magnus slightly bend over to pick something up from the bottom shelf once and I swear to Christ I saw washboard abs. How am I supposed to go out with a mere mortal after I’ve seen the abs of God?”

“Well, then, Alec Lightwood, you are freakin’ doomed.” Maia broke out into a chuckle, as she lazily flipped through TV channels. “Hey, what usually comes on around this time—”

“STOP.” Alec yanked the remote out of Maia’s hands, before eagerly pointing towards the TV screen. “Magnus! Look! Magnus! Look, look, look!”

There was now a very cheesy ad playing for Magnus’ Tarot Card Reading Services, complete with very cheap editing and awful font flashing his business’ number on the screen below. Magnus was featured prominently in the ad, too, in all of his lens-less glasses and dad jeans glory.

“Oh.” Maia turned her attention to the screen, a sly smile spreading across her face. “He is cute, huh? He looks really...wholesome. Wait, he runs a tarot card place? Aren’t those places mostly scams? And wait, what the hell? Is that Luke? Why the hell would Luke go to a tarot card place—”

“Who cares?! Don’t you see what this means?” Alec’s voice was filled with excitement. “If Magnus’ day job is running some corny tarot card reading place, and my day job is running some corny, corporate toy store...Maia, it means we’re in each other’s league. Magnus Bane is 1000% attainable. If I ask him out, he has to say yes!”

“Uh, no? I don’t think it means he has to say yes, Alec—”

“That’s it! The next time I see him, I’m going for it!” Alec emphatically clasped his hands together. “Tell Simon he’s not invited to our wedding, by the way.”

“Screw you, Lightwood!” Maia playfully threw a pillow at Alec’s head—

Before they began to laugh in nearly perfect unison.

********************************************************************

Alec wasn’t going to be able to do it—

Ask Magnus out.

Not today.

Oh God. Why did Magnus have to look like that today?

Magnus had come into the toy store wearing a perfectly fitted suit and Italian loafers, like he was fresh off some high-fashion runway.

It was the best that Magnus had ever looked, and Alec was having a hard enough time breathing. There was no way in hell that he’d be able to spare any oxygen to ask Magnus out on a date.

Not without dying.

But if Magnus ended up turning him down, maybe dying really wasn’t so bad.

“Alec...there you are.” Magnus was already smiling up at him. “I was worried you wouldn’t be in today. I...um...I really like...having your assistance.”

Alec anxiously giggled—

Fucking giggled—

Before letting out a shaky breath. “What did you...need assistance with...today, Magnus?”

“It’s kind of a weird question...” Magnus took a few seconds to continue on with his thoughts. “But...would you happen to have any...tiny fridges? Like...something that could fit inside a dollhouse?”

“Oh yeah, we have plenty of plastic accessories—”

“Oh. No. Not plastic. It needs to...um...it needs to actually work. Like. Something that could actually keep food...chilled.” Magnus glanced away from Alec—

And Alec’s own confusion soon showed on his face. “So, you’re looking for a...tiny fridge...that actually...works?”

“Right.”

“But...dolls don’t need to...eat...” Alec was still obviously puzzled. “I don’t quite understand. Is your son trying to put real food in Barbie’s fridge or something?”

“I don’t have a son.”

“Oh...” Alec subtly nodded in understanding. “So...you’ve just been buying all these toys for...for yourself...Are you a...uh...collector?”

“No.” A strange expression came onto Magnus’ face, as he roughly pursed his lips. “It’s just...I...I wish I could explain it to you, Alec, but it’s so—”

“For God’s sake, Magnus! Just tell the boy that you screwed up one of your spells!”

“Did you just...Did you just hear something?” Alec’s eyes went wide, as he looked around the room for the source of the previous phrase. “Um—”

“Magnus! Please! This exchange will go much smoother if you just admit the truth! He’s obviously smitten with you, don’t blow it by making him think you’re a complete loon!”

“Is that...was that...Did that come from your...pocket?” Alec quietly pointed towards the side of Magnus’ pants. “Is there...is there someone on speaker on your phone or something—”

Ragnor, who was currently about five inches tall, now forcefully poked his head through the lining of Magnus’ pocket—

And Alec struggled to suppress a primal scream.

“What the hell? What the hell? What the hell?” Alec whispered his curses, while also repeatedly forming the Sign of The Cross over his chest. “What the hell, Magnus? What the hell is that?”

“Careful, boy! I’m a person, just like you.” Ragnor’s voice was low with warning. “A very powerful person, actually, until my friend here, Magnus, convinced me to volunteer for one of his spells. I should’ve known better, the man hasn’t practiced his magic in centuries! But I still let him use me as a veritable guinea pig. Go on, Magnus, tell the boy what you were trying to accomplish with your magic.”

“I...was trying to change his outfit...” Magnus mumbled through the admission.

“I’m not sure the boy heard you, Magnus.”

“I was trying to change his outfit!” Magnus uttered a bit louder this time, before letting out a deep sigh. “I...Alec, it’s all just so stupid—”

“Your feelings aren’t stupid, Magnus.” Ragnor turned his body, until he was able to face Alec’s own. “My boy, ever since my friend has laid his eyes on you, he’s been positively enchanted by you. But he thought you wouldn’t be interested, what with your sense of impeccable style and flawless hair—”

“You think my hair is flawless?” Alec quietly directed the question to Magnus.

“I think everything about you is flawless.” Magnus’ response was earnest—

And Alec’s face lit up with a wide grin.

“As I was saying!” Ragnor grunted from his place in Magnus’ pocket. “My dear friend assumed that his own lack of fashion sense would make him unpalatable to your tastes, and so, he crafted a simple spell for dressing himself better. However, since he wanted to get it just right, he asked for my assistance, a stand-in, if you will. And...well...here we are.”

Ragnor motioned a hand across his tiny frame. “And here we’ll be, for at least another month and a half. Which is why I truly need that miniature fridge, my boy. Taking such small bites out of rather large foods is such a tiring task.”

“I don’t...I don’t think we have any...uh...small fridges...” Alec began to respond to Ragnor, still having to suppress his urge to scream. “But...I know a nerd! I know a nerd who probably owes me one for ruining my reputation. She’d, maybe, love to help you two figure this thing out?”

“Ah, yes. A nerd. She sounds lovely!” Ragnor smiled up at Alec. “If I trusted Magnus’ magic, I’d just have him shrink a regular fridge down to size, but I wouldn’t want it exploding or becoming sentient.”

“How many times do I have to apologize...” Magnus groaned, before shaking his pocket—

Which caused Ragnor to retreat back into its lining.

“You’re taking all this pretty well, Alec.” Magnus hesitantly made eye contact by looking above him. “Are you...Are you feeling okay?”

“I think someone put LSD in my water bottle.” Alec nodded along with his words. “I didn’t plan on getting super fucking high at work today, but that’s life, right? You win some, you lose some—”

“You’re not high, Alec.” Magnus slightly smirked. “What you saw is very real. I...well...I’m a...warlock.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m a warlock. I have magical powers.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You know, warlocks? Witches? Pointy hats? Borderline offensive Halloween costumes?”

“I don’t understand.”

Magnus finally let out a breath through gritted teeth. “Harry Potter.”

“Ohhhhh.” Alec smiled back at Magnus. “Cool, cool, cool. So, do you wanna’ like, go out on a date? Or nah?”

“You’re asking me out on a date? Right after...that?”

“Listen, I’ll be honest with you, Magnus. I’m still 98% sure that I’m high as balls right now. And usually, when I’m sober, I’m a very confident person, but you make me nervous as fuck and I could never ask you out if I wasn’t under the influence...so...yeah...” Alec smiled at Magnus again. “I’m asking you out right now. Do you wanna’ go out with me? Or maybe we can just go make out in the stock room?”

“I actually have a client to attend to this afternoon...” Magnus’ response trailed off, before he took a step closer to Alec. “But we can always reschedule making out for another time? And we can schedule that date for tomorrow night, if you’d like?”

“I’d like that very much.” Alec grabbed onto Magnus’ palms, soon giving them a gentle squeeze—

And Magnus, in turn, nonchalantly interlaced their fingers. “What time do you get off work? I can pick you up, maybe take you to this Italian place down the street—”

“Magnus, please! Just get the boy’s number and return us to the loft! Traveling in your pocket is most uncomfortable!”

“Little pocket dude is right. If you have a client, you should probably head back.” Alec sighed, as he let go of Magnus’ hands. “Can I just text you?”

“Of course. My number is N-O-H-A-R-R-Y.”

“Magnus Bane, what did Harry Potter ever do to you?” Alec laughed, while slightly adjusting his nametag. “Ugh. I should probably get back to work, too. I’ll text you, okay?”

“Okay.” Magnus didn’t move an inch, as he continued to stare over at Alec—

And Alec returned the concentrated gaze. “What? What is it?”

“Nothing. You’re just...so...you.” Magnus openly smiled—

And Alec quickly returned the expression. “You’re just so, you, too. Now, go on, get.”

Before Magnus was even a few feet out of the store’s front door, Alec was already hunched over his phone and shooting off a string of instant messages to Maia:

PrinceOfParties: I think someone spiked my water bottle with LSD

PrinceOfParties: can you google if that’s possible

PrinceofParties: I was talking to a little man in Magnus’ pocket

BlackWonderWoman: Alec what the fuck are you talking about? If you’re high you should just go home early

BlackWonderWoman: And is “little man” code for Magnus’ dick? Did you see Magnus’ dick today?

PrinceofParties: no he had a pocket man!!! he was really little and kinda’ mean

PrinceofParties: OH AND I asked Magnus out!!! He’s taking me out tomorrow!!!

BlackWonderWoman: FUCK YES I TOLD YOU TO JUST BE YOURSELF

PrinceofParties: can you come pick me up? I don’t think I should drive

PrinceofParties: I wanna’ start getting ready for my date

BlackWonderWoman: But isn't your date tomorrow night??? Alec it’s like 1PM

PrinceofParties: please? : (

BlackWonderWoman: Alright! Fine! I’ll be right there.

THE END! ALSO ENJOY THIS BANNER I MADE FOR LITERALLY NO REASON L O L

[davidmann95]

What are your thoughts on Earth One? I've read Batman and Wonder Woman but just started on Superman.

A disaster that has long since outlived its dubious usefulness, only surviving now on monstrous inertia and sheer fucking stubbornness.

In fairness, it started as a great idea. Blockbuster-style ‘realistic’ origin stories of the biggest DC heroes in the OGN format and aimed at the bookstore market, with the biggest creators out there behind it? That’s genuinely inspired. The results however…Superman: Earth One and Batman: Earth One both manage the genuinely pretty incredible feats of being the worst story told of their title characters in almost 80 years. Both reasonable in concept - JMS had handled Marvel’s #1 boy to initial success and did some interesting work with the archetype in Supreme Power, and Johns/Frank on Batman would seem a surefire thing after their work on Action Comics. But there’s a gap between concept and execution here you could pilot an entire fleet of warships through.

Batman’s an incompetent, banally vengeful, violent asshole who fails utterly at nearly every turn due to his utter lack of training or preparation, whose sole victory of substance is strangling a weaponized mentally ill man before being easily defeated by the dang Penguin, and being rescued by the use of guns. It admittedly tries to do something interesting with the idea of an urban vigilante who isn’t necessarily brilliant and unstoppable - he’s just got some incomplete military training and whatever gadgets he can cobble together - but one cheap “I’LL SAVE THIS CITY NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES!” bit later and suddenly he’s for-real Batman even though he’s still a goddamn idiot. The sequel (checked out of the library) builds on this foundation to show he doesn’t have a clue about detective work, and the Riddler’s riddles are a distraction from a simple revenge scheme because hahaha, supervillain gimmicks are stupid. Also police brutality saves the day, which has sure aged well. Plus it’s all but directly Bruce’s fault his parents were killed. Throw some faux-deep monologuing on top about the rotting heart of the city and the meaning of life and death like a Snyder/Capullo joint gone septic, and you get a comic that manages to be both unpleasant and entirely boring. Looks nice though.

Superman, on the other hand, is the honest-to-god abomination of the pair. I’ve drained most of my poison on it over the years, through distance if nothing else, but this is one of the few comics out there whose existence sincerely makes me kind of angry. Not just because it’s a bad Superman story that catastrophically misses the point of the character, those are a dime a dozen - though yes, even aside from it being a Superman story, this is a painfully stock alien invasion/’embracing who you really are’ story we’ve seen a million times in a million better configurations. No, the thing that puts it over the top of the likes of, say, Superman II - which similarly has a Superman who’s kind of a total piece of shit - is that it is a story where he learns nothing from being a garbage person, and is rewarded for it. 

There’s a scene of him at his father’s grave saying he’d rather use his powers to get rich than help people, and if not for the alien invasion, that’d be it. That’d be the end of the story, that’d be what this Clark Kent did with his life. Of course he spouts off some mealy-mouthed horseshit about how he’ll still find ways of helping people, but that’s a tad undermined that when the alien invasion does show and starts slaughtering people around the world en masse with the promise of exterminating everyone on Earth if he doesn’t fight back, he spends another 20 pages waffling until someone he likes is personally, directly threatened, making him not only a cowardly sack of shit unwilling to make the most clear-cut of moral choices, but also kind of a goddamn moron for not understanding right away that the space invaders raining laser death around the world are being serious. And then he sticks with being Superman not out of a realization that he must do what is right, or out of shame that so many died while he was afraid and selfish and refusing to waste his gifts ever again (a tack that handled right could have redeemed a lot of the earlier story), but because it turns out getting to use his gifts publicly as Superman is more fun and satisfying than being a football player. In the sequel (again, checked out of the library out of morbid curiosity) when he decides he must tackle the Real Issues, instead of overthrowing a dictatorship himself immediately and without casualties, he passes out AK-47′s to insurgents to arm a bloody revolution so that he can return the dictator’s earlier quip about how “he who has the guns makes the rules” before leaving him to die. The third at least managed to titanically up its game to crushing mediocrity - it almost reads like a new, marginally better writer trying to fix things up and manage a soft reboot - but that hardly balances the scales. As usual, I’ll default to Colin Smith’s fantastic set of articles comparing it ethically and storytelling-wise to All-Star Superman, but this is one of maybe two or so pieces of pop media out there where I can’t find enjoyment of it anything other than objectively wrong (the other being Thor: The Dark World, though that was merely really really overwhelmingly shitty).

The Titans book…existed, I guess, and didn’t pull off much more than that. Morrison/Paquette/Fairbairn’s Wonder Woman was interesting if nothing else, and it did a better job of building up Paradise Island visually as a high-concept super-feminist-fantasy-wonderland than anything else I’ve ever seen, but it was critically flawed. The characterization for Diana is pretty paper-thin, and as a feminist text it’s if nothing else yet another argument that Morrison probably shouldn’t be trying to write about contemporary social issues if he essentially refuses to use the internet - Elle Collins’ and Kelly Kanayama’s pieces on it go into its failings far better than I ever could. It was a fascinating failure at least as opposed to the rest, I’m genuinely curious where further volumes might go, but I’d consider it Morrison’s most significant failure as a superhero writer so far of the 21st century. An experiment in seeing if he could write Wonder Woman, rather than something he did out of sincere interest.

Earth One outlived its purpose once the New 52 hit, but it sold just well enough that DC couldn’t justify throwing it aside, so it still goes on. Superman may be done now that JMS has left comics (as should be Flash: Earth One, which I actually consider a shame given it apparently would have come out close to Morrison’s Multiversity Too: The Flash, which would’ve been a gut-buster of a contrast) unless someone else comes on to continue it, and Aquaman: Earth One may have fallen by the wayside, but Johns and Morrison have both confirmed there’s going to be more Batman and Wonder Woman, so at this point I don’t think it’s going to go away until we at least see Justice League: Earth One, presumably Chuck Austen’s triumphant return to DC. In spite of that though I maintain the experiment has utterly failed, the greatest testament to that being that when Morrison’s described Earth 1 in The Multiversity Guidebook he noted that the Earth was ‘in flux’, thereby inserting an escape hatch - essentially admitting that that Earth sucks so bad that you shouldn’t have to believe it actually exists in the Multiverse if you don’t want to.

EDIT: jonsei93 said: Damn, it’s kinda sad that THIS Superman gets to wear the classic costume instead of the main one. Because E1 Superman really doesn’t deserve to wear it, let alone touch it! (Yeah, I read a little of Superman Earth One, too and….yeah, I didn’t really bother acknowledging those books after that)

There are definitely people out there who considered Earth One to be the proper modern reinvention of the character rather than the New 52 guy, I’m pretty sure entirely based on that suit. Knowing this makes me feel bad.

[gideonbdbrw-blog]

#TheParty, or my favorite #HeSwallows. #BDBRW

Ezekiel: [As soon as I walked into the mansion I knew that I wasn’t in Kansas anymore. I’d been in these houses many times but nothing prepared me for the full scale event that I was now stepping into. It had been decked out to the gills. So much was going on that it was hard to take in all at once. The doggen staring at me made me realize that I was gawking like a complete idiot. He cleared his throat and oh so politely asked me for my invitation. Riiiiggghhhttt....  Now I had to prove that I even belonged here. I must not stink of money like everyone else here did. I tried not to bitter as I handed over the fancy letter. It really shouldn’t shock me. I was in a suit that was off the rack after all. How low class is that? I straightened my shoulders and puffed out my chest like all the douchebags tended to do. Yes, that was much better. I cast another glance around the room, this time acting like I could really care less. I barely acknowledged the doggen who seemed to be happy enough with what I supplied. Yeah, yeah. I am one of you assholes too. You just wouldn’t know it. My blood was just as thick as the rest. But blood meant nothing when you had nothing. I learned that long ago. I was a fish out of water here but I couldn’t let that show. I already had an idea that I was here to provide tonight's entertainment. What other reason did they have for inviting me? Other than the ever so occasional chance that someone wasn’t paying attention when they made out the invitations. Clearly my feet weren’t moving fast enough for the asshole behind me. He came through the door full of pomp and purpose with some pretty little thing on his arm. She looked at him like the sun and moon rose outta his ass. Neither one of them gave two shits that I was standing there. The male gave me a good shoulder check as he walked by. My eye twitched with the urge to clock him upside his snooty nose. Instead I discreetly pocketed the keys to his car, and probably his house among other things.] Bumped into the wrong guy, dickhole. [I mumbled under my breath. The doggen heard me and gave me a wondering look but he was too nice to question what I was going on about. I put on my best fake smile and walked into the room full of peacocks strutting and fluttering to get attention. Attention was exactly what I didn’t want. I made my way to the closest corner and parked my ass there as I watched. I had many grand plans but I had to be smart about it all. Somehow on the way to the corner I managed to pick up a handful of silver utensils and some jerkwads fancy pen. It looked better in my pocket anyways.]

Gideon:

-As I drove under the bright lights of the city on my way to this Glymera shindig, my mind was a cluster fuck of thoughts. I was tired of being under the thumb of the Princeps, always being their puppet and pulling strings to keep the integrity of their supposedly great names unblemished. My latest quest was more than I think I could even handle. I mean, the town is riddled with blood whores, but to keep someone as a blood slave, who the fuck does that. This was not the first case I had to cover, what was the youth of the Glymera coming to, I mean,  I was good at finding a lower life degenerate to take the fall, the crooks in our community had hit an all time high. Nobody trusted anyone anymore, not since the raids had hit. Many were starting to come back to the community, and that kept me busier than normal. My caseload was unbearably large. I was at the point I just wanted to tell these young punks to take it up the ass like the rest of us, but that is not what lined my pockets or kept my old man out of trouble, not to mention the problem I had when I was younger. I patted my pocket, double checking to make sure the flash drive was where I put it. I trusted no one, and kept nothing on my computer; the handy little gadgets made it easier to keep my case notes and evidence close at hand. I pulled up to the mansion, stepping out of my ride, tossing the keys to the valet. I shot him a look, one that warned the little punk not to put one fucking scratch on it or I would be taking it out of his hide. I waltzed up to the door as the Doggen stood there, waiting for no doubt for my invitation, but I knew he was well aware of whom I was. I opened up my jacket reaching into my breast pocket just as he spoke. “I do not need your invitation sir; you are on the VIP list.” I gave a warm smile to the old man and handed it to him anyways. “I don’t mind being prepared.” I pushed my way through the crowd, properly acknowledging all the wealth in the room. A server with a tray of drinks came eagerly to my side, I tipped my head and took a napkin and a glass of Champagne. I would need several more of these before the night was through. Fighting back a heavy sigh, as the rim of the glass hit my lips. I saw Lady Amor making her way to me, no doubt to proposition me to one of her ugly duckling daughters, I have been avoiding her for decades. I downed my glass of liquid courage and snagged another as they went by, replacing my empty glass with a full one. Alcohol would be my only friend tonight.-

Ezekiel: [The room was full of enough arrogance that it made me choke. Why was I here again? I spotted a flash of shimmering jewelry and suddenly remembered. Oh right, to alleviate them of their burdens. Those earrings must weigh on her terribly. I put on my most dashing smile and sauntered across the room like I owned the place. Easy pickings. Not the most attractive female in the room. She was on the hunt however. It clung to her like a stinky perfume. She assumed that simply because I was here that I was prime meat. She would shit kittens if she only knew. Sure, I was glymera. Technically. I can't even remember what we talked about but there was a lot of smiling and laughing involved. A small touch here, light brush of the hair there, and jackpot! The heavy weights attached to her ears were freed. She should thank me really. I discreetly tucked them into my pocket that would have to be emptied soon to avoid awkward bulging. Some more small talk was exchanged, so that she wouldn't immediately wonder what happened to her jewelry. Over the top of her shoulder I spotted someone who looked somehow out of place. He caught my attention, eyes narrowed as I tried to figure him out. It was probably the hair, I determined. Everyone else here, including me, had hair that was perfectly coiffed. He had a wild aire about him. The female that I was talking to saw where I was looking. "Oh, that is the counselor that they have all been talking about. Is is said that if you need ANYTHING that he is the one to go to. If you understand my meaning." My brow raised at that.] And just what is your meaning? [She flushed, as if too embarrassed to talk about the subject. I quickly waved my hand to save her from answering. Yeah, I understood what she meant. Loud and clear. That was not simply a lawyer, that was a cleaner. He hid all of the dirty things that the filthy rich did behind closed doors. My eyes narrowed and I caught myself from growling. Plain and simple, he was the reason them assholes got away with it.]

Gideon:

-I raised my hand motioning the server, leaning into her ear, my lips brushed her ear, “keep the alcohol coming my way, and I will make it worth your time.” I watched her cheeks turn a bright crimson, letting a smirk form on the corner of my lips, knowing damn good and well I would not be giving what she wanted to receive. Not that I was above that, I was just ass deep in work right now, and I didn’t need to have any clingy females driving me crazy. I might pay a visit to Zerosum later, though, the bathrooms there has such a reputation, and I had some steam to blow, or be blown. Right on cue, the little honey brought a full glass, taking the empty one from my hand. I needed to pace myself if I was going to work this crowd. The likes of half of them made me sick to my stomach, but debts had to be paid. Speaking of sick…. “Lady Amor, what a pleasure.” I took her full jeweled hand into my large palm, leaning down kissing her hand softly. I wish she could see how hard I was rolling my eyes at this moment if only in my mind. “What do I owe this pleasure? I hope you are being taken good care of.” It was common knowledge that her mate was out with his secretary almost nightly. I also had to bail him out of the human jail for soliciting an undercover prostitute. I released her hand quickly sanitizing my lips with the drink in my hand. I caught the lust in her eyes and smelled her sex as she licked her lips. I should have been an academy award winning actor right then because It was an act not to lose my shit right there and send her rather plump ass down the road. I quickly excused myself, portraying as if I had just received an important business message on my phone. It was a good thing I could go periods of time without oxygen because she was smothering me. There were plenty of unfamiliar faces here tonight, either that or I worked too hard and missed all the play. I would be making vacation plans soon, but first, I needed a lacky.-

Ezekiel: [I watched the interaction that the lawyer had with the older female. She was obviously charmed by him. It didn't take much, I'm sure. Sadly, what drew my attention was the various rings dripping from her fingers. Shiny! Okay, so I had a problem. I knew this I just didn't care. The lawyer moved away, almost like he had a case of the scratch all the sudden. And that was when the female that I'd been talking to introduced me to her mahmen. Red flags and sirens went off in my head. When I looked over, there was the older female that the lawyer had been talking to. A slow smile spread across my face as a wicked plan formed in my head. Oh it was mean of me, to be sure, and that just gave me goosebumps. I casually dropped my hand into my pocket so that I could squeeze out a drop of carmex onto my fingers. A wonderful lubricant for dastardly deeds. My smile was sweet as honey as I took the matrons hand and kissed it. Just as the lawyer had done not more than a few minutes ago. Of course this time she came away with a few less rings. Never take them all. Mustn't be greedy. I made pleasantries for a carefully allotted length of time and then came up with an excuse for me to leave. I'd been tracking the lawyer the whole time. I knew where he was and went right to him. A well timed trip, added by a shove from the massed crowd, and I was pressed up against the lawyer as if to keep myself from falling.] Oh my goodness, how clumsy of me. I'm terribly sorry. [Damn him, he smelled delicious. I flashed him my most charming smile even as my fingers were busy 'dusting him off'. The lawyer was now the proud owner of Lady Amor's rings, plus her daughter's earrings. I wouldn't want to leave that out, it would be too obvious. And I was the proud owner of a small, flat rectangle that I didn't have time to look at just yet. Whatever it was, he kept it close. It had to be important.] Sorry again... Guess I'm just not use to big crowds.

Gideon:

-I looked over the rim of my drink, scanning the crowd looking for one who could take the fall for my last client. With the abundance of the staff here, surely, I shouldn’t have a problem picking from the stock here. But with that said, none of the miserable assholes fit the build and stature I was in need of, I was in need of a male, early thirty-something looking, brown hair, green eyes and just a little over six foot tall. Oh, and they had to have tattoos. Not many have green eyes; this one was going to be rough. I let out a heavy sigh, setting my drink down to only turnaround and get pummeled by some male who wasn’t paying a bit of attention and was all up in my personal space. “Man, what the…” I tried helping him steady himself, but fuck, his hands were all over my suit. I tried to push him back to regain my air space, but damn, his hands were all over the place. His apologies were many, as a matter of fact, he wouldn’t stop. His suit said old money, but his clumsiness spoke another story. He was not as refined as most of the Glymera fucks here, must be of lower grade. I looked into his eyes. Fuck me, he had some dreamy bedroom eyes, and that smile, if it was any other situation, I might have had to take him to a quieter place and have my way with this one. He finally was steady on his feet; I held up my hand as he gave one last apology. “No worries, it is a bit crowded here tonight. You all good? Nothing broken or damaged?” I looked him up and down, not to see if he was unharmed but just to take in another eye full. After I was satisfied he was ok, I went back to business. Holding out my hand, “Gideon, and you are?” I waited for him to shake my hand and reciprocate but continued speaking. “I don’t think I have seen you around these stuffy parties before.” I had the urge to feel my pocket and make sure my flash drive was safe, but I didn’t want to seem to paranoid.-

Ezekiel: [Laughing, I duck my head, playing the bashful role.] No. Nothing broken. I'd be a little worried if I was that clumsy. [I brushed my hands down my own suit, mostly to get rid of the carmex that I still had on my fingers. It reminded me that I was still in possession of some douchebag's car keys. If this played out like I thought it would I would have to get rid of those too. Too bad. I'm sure it was a sweet ride. I looked up to see a perfectly manicured hand extended. My own callused palms were not so impressive. My brow wrinkled at the thought a moment before I wiped it from my expression. So what? I wasn't one of them. It had to be obvious enough. I took the offered hand and gave it a firm shake. My other hand was busy dropping car keys into his suit pocket. It was almost too easy. Something was going to go sideways. I just got that feeling. Like a prickling at the back of my neck.] Yes, well I'm not always deemed worthy enough to attend. [The corner of my lip turned upward in a sarcastic smile. There was no point in dancing around the fact that I clearly didn't belong here. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out. I half considered not even giving him my name and just leaving. Something stopped me from doing it though. Maybe it was the way he was running his gaze over me. It conjured up all kinds of naughty images in my head. Well hello, Mr. Gideon. Aren't you just full of surprises? Bet you are a freak in the sheets too. Suddenly we were on a playing field that I could deal with. My stance relaxed back on one foot. I ran a finger down the back of his hand with a cocky grin just before giving him his hand back. Then I folded my arms over my chest and gave him a more thorough once over. Tasty. He certainly knew how to fill out a suit. I blatantly licked a fang before answering.] Name's Ezekiel.

Gideon:

-I kept my eyes locked on his green bedroom eyes; our hands automatically went into a firm shake. He was a working man, hmmm, wondered what had happened that his family lost their way. “Ezekiel, a pleasure to meet you.” I wondered whom he might be representing here, he seemed rather jumpy or maybe just hyper, I wasn’t too sure yet. The one thing I was sure of is that he was real touchy. I wanted to pat down my pocket and make sure that my flash drive was still safe and sound in my pocket, but I didn’t want to offend my new acquaintance with the open search. “Look, not everybody is always what they appear to be.” In my head, I was saying what the fuck ups the Glymera were, and I knew because of my fathers shady past when they found out I finished law they blackmailed me into keeping their secrets safe. “So don’t sell yourself short Ezekiel, you probably fit in here more than you realize.” The nervousness in the pit of my stomach was overwhelming me; I needed to excuse myself so that I could do one last check. I don’t know what I thought when I brought this with me; I should have locked it up in the safe like I always have done. I could feel a trickle of sweat form on my brow then I saw the wild look of Lady Amor, and she was raising her hand showing one of the Doggen, and she was looking our way. “If you will excuse me, Ezekiel, I have a phone call I need to make; business you know.” I walked away, leaving Ezekiel behind, I checked my pocket, and to my surprise, I found some jewelry. I mouthed ‘what the fuck’ then checked my other pockets only to find some car keys. My fears came true; some motherfucker picked my pockets. They picked the wrong one to steal from; I would crush whoever did this. I turned and bellowed out “Shut this Motherfucker Down; we have a thief among us.” I heard the clicks of all the locks like all they had to do is push a button. I went to the head Magistrate to sort this out; everybody will be searched, stripped search if necessary no matter who you were.-

Ezekiel: [This Gideon fellow started getting antsier by the minute. I could almost feel it wafting off of him like a nervous twitch. His comment had me wondering about him though. 'Not everyone is always what they appear to be.' Well, that was true enough. I knew that from personal experience. But I was curious as to what this one was hiding in his closet. The tension in his shoulders increased to the point where he just had to go. He made some excuse and I bowed out gracefully. I followed his gaze to Lady Amor and realized that the jig was up. This shit was going down now and I needed to protect myself. I started making my way to the door at a leisurely pace but something stopped me halfway, like a nagging instinct that something wasn't right. I always relied on instinct, it was what had kept me alive for so long. I saw a bathroom off to the side and ducked into it. As soon as the door was shut I actually stopped to see what it was that I had pilfered from the good lawyer. I pulled the item from my pocket and saw that it was a flash drive. I was both excited and cursing at the same time. Computers were really not my thing. Sure, I could wire up a house like no ones business, but you ask me to do anything with a computer and I was as lost as a toddler. It had to be important though. That much I was sure of. I was also instantly aware of the fact that this was probably what had the lawyer sweating bullets. Why the hell would he bring it here then? Was he looking to do work at the party? Outside the door a full scale eruption was taking place. Yup. The jig was up alright. I immediately went into full on survival mode. This wasn't the first time that I'd almost been caught. First thing was first, hide the evidence. Most of it had been taken care of already but I wasn't willing to give up this small piece of technology. It could be exactly what I needed to bring these Glymera fucks to their knees. My mind raced on what to do. I glanced around my surroundings and discarded about a dozen ideas before I settled on one that I wasn't happy about. Oh well. Fuck it. I shoved the flash drive in my mouth and forced myself to swallow. It took a few tries and a fuckton of water before I finally got the damn thing down. That was going to smart. A lot. Couldn't be helped. I took some time to tidy myself up before going back out to the masses. On the way I dropped all of the silverware and a very fancy pen into the garbage. A load of paper towels went on top, as if it took me half a roll to dry my hands. I sauntered out of the bathroom, all casual as you please, and stuck myself right in the middle of crowd of angry glymera clammering to get out the door as a mass panic set over the place. It was like being caught up in the middle of a herd of frightened cattle. I started hearing murmurs about jewelry missing and I couldn't help but chime in with my two cents.] Who was it found on? Have they captured the thief? Why won't they let us go? [I stirred the shit like a pro and listened as my comments went through the entire crowd.]

Gideon:

-Pushing my way through the crowd, I only had one person on my mind. Mr. Touchy Feely. He was the only one who had brushed up against me since I had been here. I handed the Doggen all the articles I found in my pockets, making sure the rings, earrings and keys went to their rightful owners. I had blood on my mind. The crowd was so large here tonight, it would take hours to process everybody, but it would be worth the wait to get back what could be my freedom. That flash drive was my ticket to not only my freedom but my Mahmens as well. My father died, taking our family in the shitter with his back alley deals, and I worked too hard to protect us, even if it seemed like a gun was always pointed to my head. Nodding at one of the Doggen, I had all eyes looking for this male, I would be questioning him personally, alone. It isn’t like I can say “Hey, I think he lifted a flash drive off me that I was planning on holding over the heads of the Princeps!” fuck I was screwed I needed to get to him before they check him over. I raked my hand through my hair and making my way to the door as they were patting down the guest. I saw him, standing there, shifting side to side. This was my only chance, but I was too late; they were searching him as I got to the door. “Find anything?” I tried to say in a calm voice. They just shook their head no. I took him by his arm, turning him, so we were face to face leaning into his ear. “I know you have what is mine, I don’t know what you’ve done with it, but I will not rest until it is back in my hands.” I hissed out the last few words. -

Ezekiel: [I admit it, I was inwardly smirking after they patted me down and came up with nothing. Nope. Not a damn thing on me. Then I heard his voice behind me asking if they found anything. Yeah, I bet you'd love to know where I put that flash drive. Fucker. No sooner did I get the thought out then I was being yanked around. I caught a startling look at almost insane eyes and then his lips were at my ear. I had to hand it to him, the guy knew how to get the heart racing. My adrenaline was through the roof right now. I would be lying if I said I wasn't riding that high a little. I got up in his ear for our personal and private convo in a room full of people that were no doubt watching.] I knew you were sweet on me the moment you started eye fucking me. I might have something you want. And you might enjoy it a whole hell of a lot. But, baby, it might just not be in the cards. You don't have to go all stalker on me. I'm sure there are plenty that would like to ride that ride. [I pulled back with a cocky grin and flashed him a wink.] Have fun explaining how all of that ended up in your pockets. [At this point I was feeling particularly stupid and I even blew him a kiss before walking out the door. I'd been cleared to go and that was exactly what I was going to do. Get the fuck out before that bear of a lawyer went full blown psycho on my ass right in front of all of the Glymera. It felt like my heart was going to jump out of my chest and take off running in front of me but I forced myself to walk calmly to my car. I wouldn't be going home tonight. It just wasn't smart. I'd crash at a hotel before I endangered my mahmen.]