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#do you really think this fandom will let you enjoy your peace?
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SPOILER IF YOU LIVE UNDER A ROCK IG
Everyone talks about how cool gojo seems when he says that "my students are watching I'm still gonna look cool". But like, look at yuta.
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Look at his face. This dude always looks like he's in The Office and knows the camera is gonna pan to his face. Bro gets so anxious that he can't even look at the camera and is always sweat dropping with the most awkward expression possible.
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neverendingford · 1 year
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#tag talk#character fight polls aren't which character is better it's which fandom is bigger and I really fucking want to stop seeing them#I have polls blacklisted and people aren't teaching things I have to blacklist everyone's individual unique poll tournament tag#because they fucking tag every single character and fandom in their 64 character bracket#I'm so tired of seeing Shion from no. 6 put up against every single other character for every single trait he's got#do you really think Danny Phantom is actually the superior white haired dude or is the Df fandom just massively bigger than the no. 6 fandom#this is basically just the post about demographic maps that are just population density maps. your stupid tournament isn't doing anything.#some polls are funny and cool and neat and interesting but 99% of them are not#like. hey quick question do you wear white socks grey socks black socks or other color stocks#make sure to reblog so I can also find out what color socks your followers who aren't my followers wear because this is imprtant information#why do we need to argue whether Shion is better or worse than some other character who is gay in a government rebellion#this is supposedly about me hating stupid polls but it's really actually about people including my favorite boi Shion in stupid polls#leave him alone leave him alone leave him alone he's gone through enough I know the fandom is relatively small don't remind me#let me enjoy my bittersweet gay anime in peace okay#just cause I don't kin him anymore doesn't mean I can't still have strong feelings about him
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thelostconsultant · 15 days
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Not a gold digger
pairing: Max Verstappen x reader
summary: Fans think you only want Max's money. But as it turns out, you were wealthy before he came into your life--you just don't make it obvious.
warnings: No smut, but there's a part that makes me say MDNI.
note: So... I'm kinda back? Idk, I'll see if I'll stick around.
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The toxicity of the fandom was becoming quite entertaining, really. It was the third time since you and Max had made your relationship public half a year ago that someone started an anti gold digger campaign to protect your boyfriend. They truly believed they were doing this for a greater good, and they all begged Max for his attention.
It always began after they sniffed out he had given you something expensive as a gift or took you shopping to a luxury boutique. While there were some people who tried to protect you by pointing out that maybe he enjoyed showering you with gifts, the rest didn't care about that. 
You lived in a small apartment back home, you were driving a five years old Renault SUV, and no one knew what you did for a living. This was enough to enrage them and make them believe all you wanted was Max's money at the end of the day. Just think about the way she's looking at him, one of them wrote about two months ago, she's so clearly not in love with him. Poor Max, someone please save him. 
Ridiculous.
“Is everything okay?” he asked when he got home and kissed the top of your head. 
You were sitting in his sim rig, using the time while it was free to practice, because you wanted to play with him when you weren't here together, and he was more than happy to show you the basics. “Someone started another campaign to cancel me,” you replied casually as you got out with his help. 
Even when you were standing in front of him, he didn't let go of your hand, instead he raised it to his lips to place a soft kiss on its back. “Gold digging?” You nodded with a sad look on your face, but less than five seconds later you were both laughing. “Look, I know you're having way too much fun with this, but–”
Without waiting for him to finish, you raised your hand to make him stop. “I'm not stepping out of the shadows, Max. I've been hiding for years, even fucking Forbes doesn't know my real name or face,” you told him.
Back in the old days, when Bitcoin appeared, your geeky uncle had gotten into mining and trading it. He knew the potential, so he put most of his savings into buying them, then he held onto them, and by the time he got sick years later, he knew they were valuable and would be worth a lot more in the upcoming years. In his will, he left his savings and his wallet to you, giving you the chance to use them as you wished since you had learned everything about crypto from him.
So now you had Bitcoin as well as old fashioned investments, and you had used your money to help out an up-and-coming tech company for a forty percent share, and it was later sold to a tech giant for a lot of money. But despite your wealth, you chose to stay under the radar, because you loved your small apartment, and you weren't about to trade it for some fancy penthouse. 
You had met Max the year before in Las Vegas. F1 was a sport you watched with your uncle while he was still alive, and you were hell-bent on getting a VIP pass for the weekend. If you asked your boyfriend, he would say it was love at first sight, but in reality he was just annoyed by you. For a solid ten seconds, he would correct you every time you talked about it.
You agreed that you would hide in Max's apartment until this latest campaign died down, which gave you some time to spend together in peace. Every now and then you checked the tags to see how things were going, and after the silence of the past few days, today your name was trending again. Ready to have a good laugh, you opened the tag, but the most popular post gave you a minor stroke.
“Oh, fuck me,” you yelled as you launched your phone into the couch.
Max pulled the headset down to his neck as he looked over at you. “Is everything okay?” You raised your finger to your lips as if you wanted him to stay quiet, but luckily he got the message. “I'm muted. So?”
You grabbed your phone and went over to him. “They know. One of those idiots from the company I helped back in the day posted a tweet to protect me, saying that if it wasn't for me being an angel investor, they wouldn't be millionaires now,” you summarized as you gave him the device.
He scrolled through a series of tweets, and found a post from a journalist of Forbes in which he promised a proper investigative piece based on this info. He handed you the phone, then wrapped an arm around your waist. “It's okay, schatje. I know that's not what you wanted, but maybe they'll stop with the recurring hate campaign now,” he tried. “And if you’re worried about the article… Don’t be. There is nothing compromising about you. Yes, you inherited the money, but you have proven you know what to do with it.”
“Maybe you’re right,” you admitted with a sigh. 
“I’m usually right. C’mere,” he said as he reached out to pull you closer, but you glanced over at the camera. Rolling his eyes, he quickly turned it off, then gave you an expectant look. “Will you hug me now? And I want a kiss too.”
With a laugh, you leaned down to wrap your arms around his neck and gave him a soft kiss. But he wanted more, his hand slowly sneaked under your shorts, his fingers running over your clothed cunt before he decided to pull your panties aside and dip a finger between your folds. You moaned into the kiss, but he pulled away a second later to lick his finger clean. 
Shaking your head with a chuckle, you patted his shoulder and walked back to the couch. You could feel Max’s eyes on you the whole time, and when you looked at him again, he flashed a devilish smile at you. “I should quit the stream. Now that I had a taste, I want more,” he told you. 
“I’m not going anywhere, just try to be patient.”
He looked back at the screen, then put the headset back on his head and unmuted his mic. “Sorry, I have to go. See you next time,” he told the others, then logged out. You couldn’t remember the last time he left the sim rig this fast, and only a few seconds later he was kneeling in front of you, eagerly reaching up to pull your shorts off you.
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liked by user1, user2 and 947,896 others
f1gossips: Breaking news! Turns out Max Verstappen's girlfriend isn't a gold digger after all as she has her own fortune according to the investigative article published by Forbes. Will the fans apologize?
view all comments
user2: And here I was, thinking she's just a greedy airhead...
user3: Easy to be wealthy with your uncle's money.
↳ user4: Have you read the whole thing? She invested the money and helped out several startups--that later became pretty successful--as an angel investor. Yes, maybe she inherited a lot of money, but she knows what to do with it.
↳ user5: May I remind you how many F1 drivers started their careers with their families's money?
user6: Told you she wasn't a gold digger. Suck it, haters.
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liked by yourusername, landonorris and 1,577,353 others
maxverstappen1: If you don't buy your girlfriend gifts every once in a while, you're a bad boyfriend. I love to spoil her, it's not a crime. I love her, I'm proud of her, and you can send us as much hate as you want, it will only make us stronger.
tagged: yourusername
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yourusername: I'd be perfectly fine without the gifts, I already told you.
↳ maxverstappen1: I don't care.
landonorris: You're absolutely right!
↳ maxverstappen1: You're single, how would you know?
↳ landonorris: Just FYI, I've been in relationships before.
danielricciardo: You're so disgustingly smitten with her. (I love you both.)
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miaoua3 · 28 days
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could you do more wonwoo hcs?? here or on tiktok and maybe a little 18+… 🤫
hi! im doing a round two of husband hcs on tt as it is so he’s coming there either way! but i will do a bit here too, since you requested spicy ones as well (and i don’t want to get reported AGAIN on tt😭) so here you go! enjoy!
Wonwoo Boyfriend Headcanons:
•(sfw! hcs):
i feel like wonu would either go for someone exactly like him- im talking a proper nerd that likes things like lotr, games, is into science and all that- or somebody exactly the opposite of him, like a girly girl that likes makeup and who isn’t really into games all that much (maybe likes playing mario cart?? lol) and who talks 100 miles per hour, he just has this personality that easily adapts to people around him and he always tries to find a common ground with them to talk about so i can see his relationship going either way
we all said this at least once again but let’s repeat it just in case- sitting on his lap while he’s gaming is a MUST, he just loves your weight that grounds him while he’s aggressively typing on his keyboard, plus if you scratch his head while he’s in his own world? bye, he has officially entered heaven and isn’t sure how much he’d like to come back to the earth
unfortunately can’t cook for SHIT so you will have to take over that responsibility lol but he will try to help you to the best pf his abilities like handing you the things or maybe measuring some ingredients, BUT KEEP HIM AWAY FROM THE KNIVES AND MANDOLINS, ANYTHING SHARP FOR THAT MATTER
you would think that he would want to be discreet and keep his relationship a secret…you would think that, wouldn’t you? but then he’s off, buying you EVERYTHING matching, be it clothes, watches, jewellery, even glasses if you need to wear them- he would never want to hide you, he loves you so much and is so proud to be your partner, he wants to parade you around so everyone can know that you two belong to each other, he just doesn’t like going around and airing his business and private things about his relationship
loves to read you books at evening or when you two are going to sleep, there’s just something so calming about having your head resting on his chest or shoulder while he’s reading to you and seeing slowly fall asleep because of his voice-there’s nothing quite like having the love of your life be so at peace with you that they fall asleep because of you alone, there’s something so intimate and precious about the whole thing that always makes him fall asleep with a smile in his face
definitely another one that is obsessed with your hair, he just loves to play with it, twirl it around his fingers, (attempt to) braid it, grab a bit into a pony and spin it around while making helicopter noises lol he’s obsessed and is probably why you need to wash your hair more often because of him, him touching it makes it so much more dirtier so much faster lmao but its okay because he’s just a baby and he isn’t doing it out of some evil intent but because…fluffy hair makes wonu go woooow lemme play with it lol
people heard that therapist say that he gets jealous easily and that he’s a very territorial person and ran with it and made him out to be this cold and borderline aggressive partner (and now he has to play into that fantasy anytime he’s on a talk show which like ew leave my man alone) when that isn’t the case at all-he’s just very protective of you and just wants you to assure him that there isn’t anything for him to worry about because you are HIS and his alone, he just doesn’t look like the type to be so cold and controlling person and idk how most of the fandom came to that conclusion but okay
•(nsfw! hcs):
gets off from hearing you moan and call out his name, he himself isn’t the most vocal in the bedroom but he definitely loves it when you’re all whiny and crying out for him, he literally get 10x harder just from hearing your moans hit the shell of his ear
can definitely see him have a spit kink, just something about you knowing already when to open your mouth and him spitting in your mouth and you swallowing it and opening your mouth to show him that you swallowed it all like a good girl gets him going like nothing else in this world, also likes letting a drop of spit fall on your pussy when he’s about to enter you, he can’t explain it either but he just likes doing this so much like brain go brrrr when your girl swallows your spit
we all saw this coming but lets act surprised okay- cockwarming while he’s gaming is a must, he just loves seeing your leg shake with need while you try to sit there on his cock like a good girl while he, too, is trying to act all normal and talk into the mic while gaming-its all just so erotic and is your type of foreplay that is sure to make him fuck you very hard and well later
i can definitely see him being into collars and leashes (since he’s an anime fan and those two kinda go hand in hand), there’s nothing quite like seeing a pretty collar wrapped around your tiny and slender neck that makes his brain go completely blank- and if you decide to surprise him and pop on a some cat ears on your head? well let’s just you won’t be able to walk the next day lol
another one with a size kink, just seeing himself tower over you and being able to cover your whole body with his own makes his cock ache so hard, seeing how small your hand is while he’s holding it in his own, feeling your small hands on his huge back- it all just makes him so hard and brings him so much pleasure knowing that despite that much difference in size and strength you chose to trust him with your body makes him go even more insane than before
oh this little rascal that loves to finger you in public places will be the death of you, you can’t wear a skirt around him if you are out in public because he will just creep behind you and first start by gently rubbing your butt, and then getting his hand underneath your skirt until he finally full on fingers you in public, you pray to every known god that nobody can see you two and how easy you have given into him fingering you in the bright daylight
isn’t into degrading you by calling you names, but he will definitely kinda mock your from time to time, he will just go “aww, what’s that baby? is this cock too big for you? should we maybe stop then?”, he just likes to rile you up and make you whine in need for him, but he would never call you names :( he loves you too much for that
anyway that’s all for wonwoo! hope you like it nonnie🫶
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jedijune · 5 months
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Jedi June 2024
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A creative fandom event dedicated to appreciating the Jedi, taking place during the entire month of June! Each week will feature two prompts, around which people can create fanwork (of any kind – fic, art, cosplay, edits, anything you can think of) or meta focusing on the Jedi and the Jedi Order. All eras and continuities are welcome; OCs, established characters, doesn’t matter – it just needs to be about appreciating the Jedi!
Rules:
If you are participating, please tag your work/meta with #jedi june and/or @ this blog so that I will see it and reblog it here. All work must be your own. Feel free to crosspost it off-site.
This is an appreciation event, focusing on what we love and enjoy about the Jedi – not what we don’t. This is not the place to air your grievances with the Code, take potshots at the Council, prop certain Jedi/certain eras of Jedi up at the expense of others, or disparage the Jedi Order or their philosophy (including the concept of non-attachment) and way of life in any way. You are free to do that on your own time if that’s your thing, but it has no place within this event.
AUs and crossovers are allowed, with caveats: again, the purpose of this event is to appreciate the Jedi as Jedi, so sticking your favorite Jedi characters in something like a modern AU or making them all Sith or Mandalorian is not really within the spirit of this event. However, AUs such as making a non-Jedi character a Jedi, having a character survive their canon death, giving a character a different teacher or padawan, or killing Palpatine off-screen in an unspecified yet embarrassing and painful manner, would all be perfectly fine. Use your best judgement to determine whether an AU fits the spirit of the event or not.
Ships are allowed as long as they’re not between a child and adult, and following the above rules.
Please tag any spoilers up to two weeks after the relevant content has aired.
Following the prompts is encouraged, but not required. Any sort of pro-Jedi content is encouraged all year month long, and if tagged (and following the rules), will be reblogged.
We also have an AO3 collection!
Prompts:
Week 1 (June 2 - 8):
Prompt 1: Fun/Joy
Prompt 2: Comfort
Week 2 (June 9 - 15):
Prompt 1: Advice/Inspiration
Prompt 2: Balance
Week 3 (June 16 - 22):
Prompt 1: Art/Music
Prompt 2: Peace
Week 4 (June 23 - 29):
Prompt 1: Non-attachment/Letting go
Prompt 2: Cross-lineage mentorship
Bonus (any time):
Prompt 1: Eyes Closed/Trust in the Force
Prompt 2: Animal Friendship
If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask! I hope you will have fun participating!
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Static banner credit @independence1776​​
gif banner credit @trickytricky1​​
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caplanbuckybarnes · 7 days
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Future Holds Me (billy hargrove)
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Summary: You and Billy get interrupted by Max and Eleven.
Warnings: Fluff
WC: 1K
requested: by @fandom-princess-forevermore my beloved <3\\ You asked about domestic fluff for Billy Hargrove. It's simple for me: Billy and his girlfriend are enjoying some quiet, intimate time when Max and Eleven interrupt to talk boys or other stuff. They all bond, and when she returns to Billy, the subject of kids is brought up, and she pictures Billy as a cute girl dad.
Read on A03!
--
The soft glow of the afternoon sun filtered through the curtains of Billy’s bedroom, casting a warm light across the quiet space. You and Billy were tangled up on the bed, limbs intertwined as you lay in the comfortable silence. His fingers absentmindedly traced patterns on your arm while you rested your head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.
“This is nice,” you murmured, tilting your head to look up at him. His lips curled into a rare, soft smile, his usual cocky demeanor melted away in the comfort of your closeness.
“Yeah, it is,” Billy replied, his voice low and husky. He leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, making your heart flutter. Moments like this were rare, where he let his guard down completely, and you treasured them.
Before you could lose yourself completely in the moment, the door to Billy’s room swung open without warning. Startled, you both sat up, your peaceful bubble instantly burst by the two girls standing in the doorway—Max and Eleven.
"Hey!" Max greeted cheerfully, completely oblivious to the intimate moment she’d just interrupted. Eleven gave a small wave, her expression more reserved but curious as ever.
Billy groaned, flopping back onto the pillows with a dramatic sigh. “Seriously?” he muttered under his breath. “Can’t you two go bother someone else?”
Max ignored him completely, her attention already focused on you. “We were looking for you!” she said, her eyes lighting up. “We wanted to talk about boys.”
“Yeah, boys,” Eleven chimed in with a small smile, though her understanding of the subject was still a bit limited.
You laughed, sitting up a bit straighter. “Oh, yeah? Well, you’ve come to the right person.”
Billy rolled his eyes and sat up, clearly irritated at being interrupted. “You’re really going to leave me for this?” he asked, half-joking but with an edge of genuine annoyance.
“I’ll be right back,” you promised, leaning down to plant a quick kiss on his cheek. He grumbled something under his breath but let you go.
You followed Max and Eleven out of the room and into the living room, where the three of you plopped down on the couch. The conversation flowed easily, with Max teasing you about Billy and Eleven asking curious questions about relationships. It was fun, bonding with the girls, and you could feel the sisterly affection Max had for you, especially now that she trusted you with her brother.
“Do you think Billy’s…good boyfriend material?” Max asked suddenly, raising an eyebrow as if genuinely unsure. Eleven’s eyes widened with interest.
You chuckled, thinking about how soft and gentle Billy could be when it was just the two of you. “He’s a lot better than he seems,” you admitted. “He just doesn’t show that side of himself to everyone.”
Max made a face, clearly not convinced. “I’ll take your word for it.”
Eventually, the conversation shifted from boys to other things, and by the time you were ready to head back to Billy, you felt a deeper connection to the two girls. They waved you off, satisfied with their bonding session, and you made your way back to Billy’s room, where he was sprawled out on the bed, looking impatient.
“Took you long enough,” he grumbled as you crawled back into bed beside him.
“Sorry, we got distracted,” you said, snuggling up next to him again. “They’re really sweet.”
Billy sighed, wrapping his arm around you again, though this time there was something more thoughtful about his expression. He was quiet for a few moments before he spoke again.
“You’re good with them,” he said softly, almost like he didn’t want to admit it. “With Max. And even with El. I’m not really…good at that kind of thing.”
You glanced up at him, surprised by the shift in his tone. “You could be,” you said gently. “You’re good when you try. Max looks up to you, even if she doesn’t show it.”
Billy’s expression softened, his blue eyes meeting yours with a vulnerability that he rarely showed. “I dunno,” he muttered. “Sometimes I think maybe I wouldn’t be so bad at that…you know, having kids.”
Your heart skipped a beat at his words. You had never talked about the future like this, not seriously. But now that he’d brought it up, you couldn’t help but imagine it — Billy as a dad, maybe even a girl dad. You could picture him with a little girl on his shoulders, her giggles filling the air as he pretended to be annoyed but secretly loving every second of it.
“You’d be cute as a girl dad,” you blurted out before you could stop yourself.
Billy looked at you like you’d just said the most ridiculous thing in the world. “A girl dad?”
“Yeah,” you said, grinning now. “You’d be overprotective and teach her how to stand up for herself. She’d wrap you around her little finger, and you’d let her get away with everything.”
He snorted, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes. “You think so?”
“I know so,” you teased, imagining a little girl with his blonde curls and piercing blue eyes, running around causing trouble just like him. “She’d be your mini-me.”
Billy’s smirk faded a little as he considered it, his expression growing serious. “I don’t know if I’d be good at it. I never had a good example, you know?”
You reached up, cupping his cheek with your hand. “You’d be better than you think, Billy. You’ve got a good heart, even if you don’t show it to everyone.”
He leaned into your touch, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, they were soft, filled with an emotion you rarely saw from him. “Maybe,” he murmured. “One day.”
“One day,” you echoed, your heart swelling with the thought of a future you hadn’t fully considered until now.
Billy smiled at you, a real smile this time, before pulling you closer. “Guess we’ll see.”
And in that moment, wrapped up in his arms, you couldn’t help but believe that maybe, just maybe, Billy could be the dad you pictured him as — protective, loving, and better than he ever gave himself credit for.
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impactedfates · 9 months
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so like i was thinking of scenarios where genshin or also hsr men whichever you pick <333 could we get some Christmas hcs :)) please 🎄
★ A/N: I decided to do Genshin characters for this request :)) Why not spend Christmas with the fandom that my account started off with hehe. Here's the Xmas special!! Hope you enjoy :>
☆ Genre/Trope: Fluff + Platonic (But can be seen as romantic if you want)
★ Format: Mini Scenarios (Characters Included (Separate): Diluc, Zhongli, Ayato, Alhaitham, Lyney + Childe)
☆ Warnings: None
★ Extra: Reader is NOT traveler // Some brief mentions of my OCs in some // Possible OOC Lyney
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I don't think Diluc would necessarily spoil you but he wouldn't exactly NOT spoil you. We know he's rather rich and he can likely get you whatever you so wish however I believe Diluc's one of the types to not want to spoil people too much especially as many likely try to be his friend due to his income.
You'll get multiple gifts from and likely one or two of them are rather expensive things you once expressed an interest in liking, there's also smaller gifts like perhaps a plush of your favourite animal but there's also some homemade gifts he made. A good mix.
I feel like Diluc is someone who usually enjoys spending Christmas alone or just with a few close friends, when or if friends are over he enjoys sitting by the fireplace and chatting. He's not the type to do any of those Christmas games but there is a chance he could get roped into it one day.
Definitely doesn't drink, we all already know he doesn't like the taste of alcohol, besides. Even though he technically has the day off, I feel he'd rather not have a hangover the next day, whether or not he's off.
Speaking of a day off, once the maids/butlers finish their work. Which for that day would be small, just cleaner around the house and maybe cooking a Christmas dinner if friends are over, they can all go home. I also feel Diluc lets them have the next day off as well but for the whole day. He can deal with the housework.
At the end of the day, I think spending Christmas with Diluc means a very peaceful and quiet day. He wants to relax and he'll let himself, you and his workers relax just so they can spend time with those they hold close to their hearts.
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Zhongli knows about the things people do on Christmas and he's more than happy to join in if it makes you happy. He goes out shopping for things for his friends (this time he DOES remember his wallet) and ensures it's the best quality while also ensuring it's something that would make you and others happy.
Hu Tao decides to hold a party, inviting you and Zhongli both! There's party games set up, a dinner made and also she insists on not handing out presents yet as she decides to do it near the end of the party, allowing everyone to give out their gifts and they can either open it or open it later at home.
If you decide to open it once you've been given the gift, Zhongli watches your reaction to see if he made a right choice in gifts and sure enough, with the way your face lit up tells him all he needed to know.
Once gifts have been given out, he excuses himself and leaves the party, bidding everyone a farewell. Why? Simple, he must spend some time with the Adepti as well right?
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Ayato prefers spending Christmas with mainly family, of course he's not opposed if Thoma or Ayaka wishes to bring along a friend to join their celebration however he's not one to do the same himself.
This doesn't mean he won't give you a gift however, he still does. Ensuring it's wrapped with care before giving it to you. He knows what you like and likely gets exactly what you want.
It's not likely to really hang out with Ayato on Christmas unless Ayaka or Thoma invites you to celebrate with them. Christmas with the Kamisatos is a mix between peaceful and chaotic. We have the hotpot game where Ayato feels a bit more devious in what he adds but there's also the gift giving where people share smiles and thanks over what they got.
Sadly though, I feel unlike some characters, he's one of the few who still has some work to do despite the day. He gets them done quickly so he can hang out with family but the day after it's straight back to work.
But just seeing the smiles of his friends and family make it worth it for him, even if he can't celebrate the whole day and might only get a few hours and he needs to work the next day as well. Just seeing people he cares about being happy is enough for him.
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For Alhaitham, I feel like he isn't one to really celebrate Christmas, not like his roommate anyways. Like he'll buy presents for friends but he won't really participate any further than that.
You can try to drag him to a Christmas Party, to have a Christmas dinner or whatever Christmassy thing you do but he'll refuse each time. While he does understand why people enjoy it and it's not that he doesn't enjoy it. He himself just prefers spending time alone.
You'll likely find him using the fact that many people are at home with family and friends to maybe take a peaceful and quiet walk, use the library to read, maybe he might go to the museum if it's opened or he might just be in his room for the rest of the day.
Overall, it's not that he doesn't like Christmas or anything like that, he just prefers to use the day to get time for himself without annoying scholars, he'll still make sure to get gifts for everyone and give them to them however aside from that, don't expect him to respond if you try to call him, he probably has his noise-cancelling headphones on.
(*Something to note: If you are his lover then he would like to spend time with you as well*)
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I see Lyney performing a magic show, free of charge. He wants people to see the magic of Christmas. Well...as Christmassy as he can get it, it's your regular magician tricks with maybe some Christmas themed props.
He does this every year, and he'll also pick random kids from the audience and give them a gift. Kinda like a lucky draw! He adores the way the kids face lights up in delight as they quickly rush beside him and he asks them to choose a gift.
After the shows over, he disappears home so he can celebrate with you and his siblings, still doing magic to do so however haha. He'll make your gifts appear in your hands. He ensures you all have fun on this day as he believes that's what Christmas is about. To have fun with family. He even gets gifts for everyone in the orphanage!
However, you may find him on the floor wrapped in wrapping paper the morning of Christmas as he tries to struggle his way out.
"I was trying to wrap a teddy bear"
Is all he could say as he worms his way towards you so you can free him.
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I think most of us can agree Childe is big on this day. Especially when it comes to family. He doesn't care how much something is, if his siblings want it he'll get it. No questions asked...although perhaps you could convince him not to get a "Mega Mr Cyclops" for Tuecer, I highly doubt Zakhar would want to see a certain redhead in his office when he's meant to have a day off.
He also spoils you as well actually! Let's say you went window shopping with him one day, not buying anything but just pointing out various things you seem to like. As long as you end up never getting them, expect each item to be in your Christmas present.
On one hand I feel he would have a day off, on the other, there's still that chance that Lady Tsaritsa needs him to do something, and he hates when that happens cause all he wants to do is be with his family and friends but his loyalties to her must come first.
He tries his best to get it done fast so he can come home, let's hope you have spare clothes for him encase and red stains catch on his clothes yeah?
Overall, he is probably the most enthusiastic about the day out of everyone listed.
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Happy holidays everyone!! I hope this year has been going on well and I hope next year goes great for youse as well.
Honestly seeing how much my account has grown since my first post compared to now is almost unreal for me but I'm so grateful you all seem to enjoy my work ^^
As it's Christmas (where I am rn) I hope you enjoy today guys :))
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anonymousewrites · 5 months
Text
A Not-So-Disastrous Romance (Book 1) Prologue
Kusuo Saiki x Reader
Prologue: Troublesome "Friends"
Summary: Saiki gives everyone the rundown on his "bothers," including (L/N) (Y/N).
Mouse Note: Welcome to A Not-So-Disastrous Romance! I am very excited to share this story with everyone, even if this fandom is very old. Truth be told, I wrote 11 chapters like three years ago, so the first few chapters don't have the level of writing I have now, but I ended up finishing this story and wanted to share it. For another point, I know that people view Saiki as asexual and sometimes aromantic, but I feel an affinity for him being asexual but demi-romantic, so I play it slow-burn. That being said, terrible beginning writing aside, I really hope everyone enjoys. Let me know what you think, commenting helps me keep writing, and I love interacting with people! Welcome to the story!
Quick Key: "Hello" -Saiki speaking telepathically Hello -Saiki thinking "Hello" -regular people talking out loud Hello -regular people thinking
            Saiki teleported to the roof to avoid Teruhashi and Nendou. One was troublesome enough. Two was insupportable.
            “Where’s Saiki? Huh? What’s going?” wondered Teruhashi, confused.
            I teleported without thinking. Saiki looked down at the crowd below him. People around me didn’t seem to notice me, but naturally, Teruhashi thinks something is strange. Well, Teruhashi, just think I was an illusion and forget about it.
            “Nendou!” remarked the pretty blue-haired girl upon seeing him.
            “Oh, wow, Teruhashi!” squeaked Nendou, blushing.
            “Have you seen Saiki?” asked Teruhashi.
            “What? My pal? No, I haven’t.” Nendou was too startled to think.
            N-no way…did he disappear? thought Teruhashi, Is it possible that I was the one seeing an illusion? She recalled what she had assumed of Saiki: “You’re so much in love with me that you see illusions of me, huh?” A light blush spread across her face. Don’t tell me I’m…No! I can’t be… She clutched her heart. Oh, no…What’re these feelings? Is it possible…that I fell in love…with Saiki?
            Oh, wow, thought Saiki as he deadpanned. This is not how he wanted things to go.
            He sighed and teleported to a nearby, empty alleyway. Sighing, he decided to go for a coffee jelly. With the new problem he had just acquired, Saiki decided he might as well enjoy a little bit of peace. He walked quickly in the opposite direction of Nendou and Teruhashi, even if it took him on a long route to Café Mami. For once in his life, he was lucky and didn’t bump into anyone on the way there. His luck ran out, however, as soon as he entered.
            “Saiki!” called a teenager with (H/C) hair and (E/C) eyes. They were grinning and waving.
            He couldn’t avoid them now; it would draw attention to him for being rude. He sighed and sat down across from them.
            This is (Y/N) (L/N). They’re another troublesome person who complicates my life. They even call me their friend and insist I use their first name. The worst part is I can’t read their mind. They aren’t dumb like Nendou, though. Do you see those earrings?
            (Y/N) had simple, metallic studs in their ears.
            They’re made of germanium, which apparently keeps me from seeing through them with my X-ray vision or hearing their thoughts with my telepathy.
            He had only realized this after he saw them during school and on the weekends and the only thing that was the same between the outfits was their earrings. Saiki wished he could get his hands on some germanium. Hearing everybody’s thoughts was tiring. That being said, (Y/N) being unreadable was…disconcerting.
            “Nice to see you, Saiki. Are you here for your usual coffee jelly?” asked (Y/N) cheerfully.
            The pink-haired psychic nodded. Yare yare…Why do I hang out with you?
            “Oh!” They brightened. “I guess since you’re kind of like my guest right now, I should treat you!”
            Saiki’s eyes widened in excitement. Ah, I remember now. (Y/N) treated him to, well, treats. That made them more tolerable than other people.
            Seeing his expression, (Y/N) laughed. They knew what he was excited for. “You’re more excited to see the coffee jelly than to see your friend.” They didn’t mind, though. They knew Saiki wasn’t one for being open or friendly, but they’d spent enough time with him to know he’d just leave if he really didn’t like him.
            He wanted to say that they weren’t friends, but even he had to admit, he thought they were pretty tolerable compared to most of the people who crowded around him. Sure, their bright optimism was sometimes exhausting to Saiki, but for the most part, they were pretty low-maintenance and understood he was an extreme introvert and liked time to himself. Plus, although they were energetic at times, but they understood when things were too much for Saiki. And, to be completely honest, he didn’t mind getting to be around someone he couldn’t hear the thoughts of. He could act like a relatively normal person.
            Saiki would never say all that, though. No way. No, the only thing he’d say was, “Coffee jelly is really good.”
            “Can’t argue with that,” admitted (Y/N).
            Their server, who coincidentally was Mera (probably trying to make money as usual), approached their table. She took their orders and headed to the kitchen to alert the chefs.
            “You look more annoyed than usual, what happened?” asked (Y/N).
            Saiki sighed. They unfortunately pay attention to me and can read parts of my emotions. It’s weird. Maybe they’re an empath. “I ran into Teruhashi.”
            (Y/N) laughed. “The only guy immune to her charms.”
            “She brings too much attention.”
            “You’re friends with Nendou and Kaidou. A bit of attention is inevitable,” teased (Y/N), leaning on their hand and grinning.
            “They’re not my friends.”
            “Uhuh, sure, whatever helps you sleep at night,” chirped (Y/N).
            Mera brought their orders. Luckily, she hadn’t stolen a bite from either of the coffee jellies.
            “Mmmm,” hummed (Y/N) and Saiki contentedly at the taste.
            Peaceful relaxation with (Y/N). Just the way I like it. Saiki sighed happily.
Taglist:
@elaemae
@painstakingly-juno
@characterreaderwriter
@melovepurple
@sleep-7372
@w0mank1sser
@geminigengar
@noodleryworld
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cozy-cinnamon-roll · 7 months
Text
A Princess' Guide to Interrogating a Radio Demon
Fandom: Hazbin Hotel
Pairing: Ler!Charlie, Lee!Alastor (strictly platonic)
Content/Trigger Warnings: tickling, interrogation (in the most playful sense). If there are any trigger warnings you'd like me to add in the future (and/or to this fic), PLEASE let me know! I am always happy to oblige.
This is a ticklefic! If that's not your cup of tea, kindly move along.
This is my first fic for Hazbin Hotel, so any feedback would be welcomed and deeply appreciated! (also, let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future work - I'm quite sure this'll be FAR from my last fic for this fandom hehe)
Hope you enjoy!
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Ever since he'd discovered glam metal, Angel has been blasting it nonstop from his room.
Unfortunately, his room happens to be directly beneath Alastor's... and the insulation in the hotel's walls leaves an awful lot to be desired. The Radio Demon's eye had been in a constant twitch for three days by the time he'd finally had enough.
"Alastor? Have you seen Angel's speakers?"
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When Charlie appears in his doorway, the demon in question is sitting comfortably on his couch, sipping a mug of black coffee and reading a newspaper (though Charlie isn't sure how he acquired it - the local paper has been out of print for weeks).
"No. But I've certainly had the displeasure of hearing them."
"They've gone missing. Do you have any idea where they might be?"
"Far away, I hope."
Charlie rolls her eyes and leaves to go consult the other guests. The deer takes a long draw from his mug.
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To Alastor's slight irritation, he only enjoys a few minutes of peace before the princess' voice echoes from the hall again.
"Oooh, Al...." Charlie sings.
"What is it, my dear?" the Radio Demon sings back absently.
"Nifty says she saw you with Angel's speakers yesterday."
"Did she?" He flips a page of his newspaper.
"Look, all I need to know is where you put them."
Long pause. "I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about."
"Alastor."
"Whaaat?" Though his eyes haven't left the page, his grin has widened slightly. "You think I'm lying?"
"You're always lying. That's your thing."
"...Touché."
Charlie perches on the sofa beside him.
"Are you gonna tell me where it is or not?"
"Fine. I'll be completely honest with you."
She perks up.
"I would honestly die a second death before subjecting myself to one more note of that infernal garbage."
Alastor's eyes flick up from his paper for the briefest of seconds, just to watch the bubbly princess' face fall into a delightfully exasperated scowl.
"You can't steal someone's stuff just because it annoys you!"
"On the contrary. That's exactly what I did."
Charlie narrows her eyes. "Alastor. You tell me where Angel's speakers are or else."
Alastor chuckles in spite of himself - Charlie's attempts to be intimidating never fail to amuse him.
"What's so funny about that?"
"My dear, I say this with the utmost respect and admiration for your many talents: there's a reason I tend to be the one called upon to scare off demonic threats."
Charlie huffs and crosses her arms. "Just because you're creepier and... more sadistic than me, doesn't mean I don't have ways of making you talk."
"Oh?" Alastor arches a skeptical eyebrow at his paper.
"So you better watch your step, Mister."
"Hmm. You make a compelling case." He flips another page. "Maybe I should tell you where Angel's poor excuse for music is."
Charlie brightens. "Really?"
"No."
The princess deflates.
He's right, of course: even if Charlie figures out a way to make herself legitimately threatening to the Radio Demon... he's the fucking Radio Demon. She may be the Princess of Hell, but she doesn't want to have to rebuild the hotel from rubble all over again.
The two sit in impassive silence for a few minutes - Charlie glaring at Alastor, Alastor staring stubbornly at his paper - until she finally stifles a sigh and slouches against the cushions. He's enjoying this, she just knows it. Sitting there with that stupid grin. He's probably been laughing to himself all night, imagining poor Angel waking up and finding his most prized possession missing.
She finds herself wishing she could make the old deer laugh himself sick sometime, just to teach him a lesson.
...Which is a horrible thought! Charlie's eyes widen, her brow furrowing in self-disgust. She could never bring herself to hurt Alastor, even via laughter.
In fact, she quite likes his laugh - it's a little maniacal, sure, and certainly hard to truly enjoy amid the gory contexts that typically trigger it. But if she knew a way to make him laugh at something other than another person's expense, she'd probably do it all the time... it's just that the things that make him laugh also tend to make Charlie nauseous.
Once again, the princess finds herself completely baffled by her own subjects. How one could be so tickled by anything that goes on down here - the pain, the violence, the gore...
Charlie tilts her head. She may have just gotten an idea.
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If Alastor had happened to cast a quick glance down the couch, the smile creeping across Charlie's face would've been enough to give him real pause.
But since he is instead stubbornly focused on his paper, he is completely unprepared for the fingers that suddenly begin crawling oh-so-gently up his side.
To her initial disappointment, Charlie finds at least three layers of fabric dampening her touch, and aside from a subtle flinch at first contact, Alastor himself remains perfectly still.
But then a low buzz of radio static swells around them. As she probes up his ribs, she can hear a soft crinkle of paper as his grip tightens.
"Charlie..." His voice is oddly clipped.
"Mm?" Charlie takes one glance at his face, and her smile deepens - even Alastor's signature grin can't mask the effect. He's still technically staring at the paper, but his eyes have gone wide and blank. He opens his mouth to continue just as her fingers reach his armpit - and his jaw quickly clamps shut. It's clearly taking everything in him not to squirm.
"Got something to say, Al?" She starts pinching back down his ribcage.
"Mmph!" The giggles start in his chest, bubbling up and fighting to escape through clenched teeth. Soon his shoulders are shaking with the effort of holding them in.
"...Maybe about the location of a certain object?"
No response. The radio demon just curls forward a little, hiding his face in his paper.
Taking advantage of this new posture, Charlie slips her other arm around behind him, and gives a good pinch to both sides of his slender waist.
The demon straightens right back up with an audible gasp and tiny squeak of surprise (that he quickly tries to cover with a cough).
"Charlie! Are you s-seriously trying to-"
"Are you seriously ticklish?"
"No!"
In response she delivers another series of pinches to the same spot. His posture crumples again, until finally he loses his grip on his paper and twists to face her.
"No?" she giggles. And squeezes him again.
"Stop that!" He fumbles at her fingers, trying to pry them off his sides.
Instead Charlie swaps her hands, wrapping her fingers around his waist with both thumbs resting lightly on his stomach... and begins digging them right under his lower ribs.
That finally does it. He flinches back with a little snort, followed by soft but utterly helpless giggles pressed shyly into his hands.
"Awww!" Charlie coos.
"Keheh- f-fuckin'- heheh! - quiet!" His voice cracks amusingly on the last word.
There are about fifteen different things Charlie is dying to say as Alastor goes to pieces with laughter, but she can't think of anything that wouldn't risk embarrassing the poor guy - and humiliating him is the last thing she wants to do. The fact that Alastor hasn't instantly dissolved into shadows (or cursed her across the room) hasn't been lost on the princess; she is NOT about to jeopardize this moment by making him uncomfortable enough to do so.
That said, she is conducting an interrogation here.
"What was that about not being ticklish?"
His clutching at her wrists becomes more frantic. "Don't-!"
Alastor hyperventilates a couple times, trying to get ahold of himself - but then she continues squeezing down the sides of his belly, and he can only collapse into even worse laughter.
"I think I know just how to get you to talk..."
"Nohoho- ahagh, Charlie! Shihihit!"
Charlie shifts onto her knees for better leverage, gives him a gentle push backward, and pins him (surprisingly easily) against the couch. Her snaggle-toothed grin looms over him...
For a split-second, Alastor gets a flash of what his victims must've seen moments before they debuted on his show.
But he's pretty sure this isn't quite how they felt about it. He's already shaking with anticipatory giggles, grinning back at her wider than ever. And the giddy panic behind his eyes quickly forms an unlikely union with defiance.
"Do your worst, my dear."
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To be continued... pt. II is already in the works, so stay tuned!!
Until next time - hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! 💕
💜 - Cozy
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eatmeandbirthmeagain · 3 months
Note
hello there! before i begin, allow me to express how much i love your work! i've only recently come across the KoH fandom, and your writing has kept me, say, well provided for with all the reader x king baldwin fics and headcanons HEHE. so yes, thank you for the work that you do. <3333 as for my request, it was inspired by a song (the dream academy's version of "please, please, please let me get what i want", with the original by the smiths). i was thinking that it's mainly from king baldwin's perspective, wherein he's already in acceptance of his fate due to his leprosy. so that consumes most of his thoughts, only driven by his responsibility as king to keep moving. but he's not actually living, if you catch my drift. like, he has this "if death takes me now, i'll let it" sort of mentality. but then he meets reader (i'll leave as to how they met and eventually got closer up to you ^^) and his entire world changes drastically. met with this sudden change (and the newfound will to live) which begins to conflict with his time quickly running up, he prays fervently one night, begging that he will be given a second chance, to be able to spend the rest of his life with reader (hence, the song ^^). i was thinking that this is primarily angst, but if fluff will be added to it, that would be a wonderful addition too ^^
i hope this was comprehensible enough. again, thank you so much! i'd love to see how you'll interpret this in your writing! i simply can't wait ><
♧ Please Let Me Get What I Want - King Baldwin x Reader ♧
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♧ Angst ♧
A/N: Hello Sheedle!! Thank you so much for this beautiful request, along with your constant love and support. Your words really mean the world to me 🫶. I hope this is what you had in mind for the fic! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!
PS: THE IMAGE I USED FOR THIS FIC IS MF PERFECT CAN WE APPRICIATE THAT FOR A MINNUTE
TW: Leprosy
As the sun began to peak above the horizon line in the distance, the streets came alive, signifying a new day in Jerusalem.
The sunlight crept across the stone floor of the royal chambers until it reached the large, plush bed where the king of Jerusalem slept soundly. Baldwin’s eyes blinked open at the feeling of warmth on his face.
For just a moment, he was at peace. His body didn't hurt and he felt no pain. But this moment did not last long as the dull ache began to spread around his body once again.
Baldwin groaned and turned over onto his back as he came awake slowly. He stared blankly up at the ceiling. The same ceiling he had stared at so many times before.
Sleep was the only escape now. The only time he didn't feel weak or tired was when he lay in bed after a long day, finally getting some time to himself.
But in actual fact, he didn't want time to himself. What Baldwin wanted more than anything was a wife. But not just a wife, a companion.
He often thought about this and had come to the conclusion that it would never happen. No woman in the kingdom would agree to marry a leper. Certainly not any sane woman at least.
Someone who he could share his deepest, innermost thoughts with.
Someone who could show him love.
Someone who he could love in return.
As he lay in bed once again awaiting the arrival of the physicians to clean his wounds, Baldwin let this thought consume him once again.
He often pretended he had a wife. Not obviously though, just subtle little things that gave the illusion of a woman's comfort.
Baldwin turned his head to the pile of pillows that lay on the other side of his double bed and sighed. Every night, he would stack the decorative pillows that adorned his bed for aesthetic purposes beside him and lay on his side, just right so it felt like somebody was holding him.
If he closed his eyes and imagined hard enough, he could pretend to feel the warmth of another right next to him. 
At this point, Baldwin awaited death and when it came he would welcome it with open arms. It wasn't just the illness that plagued him, but terrible loneliness as well.
He felt as if the last few years of his life were nothing more than wasted potential and with so much time alone to think, he couldn't escape these thoughts. As the physicians filed into the room and began to work gently on his frail body, the thoughts remained.
It wasn't until Baldwin was informed about the arrival of princess y/n and her family that the horrible thoughts of death left his mind. His interest sparked at the mention of her name and the name of her father, who had gone down in history for winning many battles in his youth.
Their family would be staying at the castle as they searched for a husband for the young princess y/n. She was the same age as Baldwin and was known for her gentle kindness and beauty.
That was all he knew of her.
Deep down in his heart, the young king secretly wished that he would be the one to marry her. But he knew that was simply impossible.
Possible technically, yes. But would she want to? Absolutely not. In his mind at least. 
And when he layed eyes on her for the first time, it was clear he never had a chance. She wasn't just beautiful, she was a work of art. Truly stunning in every possible way.
Her hair, her eyes, her lips. She was perfect, she was gorgeous, and she was… staring right at him? With a small smile and rosy cheeks.
Her bright eyes twinkled in the sun when she looked his way, causing him to blush behind the mask. He simply couldn't tear his gaze away from her and it seemed that she couldn't do the same.
After dinner, Baldwin was just leaving the physicians quarters to retire to his chambers for the night when he was startled by y/n standing right behind a corner.
Noticing him jump, y/n chuckled. “I'm so sorry your majesty, it's only me” she said, her voice soothing as she placed a delicate hand on his arm.
The touch made Baldwin’s heart race even faster than it already was.
“Oh it-it's quite alright princess. I'm just a little on edge is all. Long day” he tried desperately to steady his heart, especially when she blinked slowly and looked into his eyes with what appeared to be adoration. But it couldn't be, right?
The two got to talking as Baldwin offered to escort her to her chambers for the night which she gladly took him up on the offer.
They spoke of her marriage and how she hoped to finally find a husband as she had been so lonely. In turn, Baldwin spoke of his own misfortune in finding a partner.
“I don't know why no one has asked to marry you princess. You're wonderful” Baldwin told her as they reached her door. Y/n chuckled, blush spreading across her cheeks.
“You're too kind my lord. I could say the same about you, you know. I mean, look at you! You're a beautiful young man” she said, her voice gentle and kind.
Baldwin felt surreal.
Nobody had ever said something like that to him before. Not since the disease had ravished his body at least.
Sensing his bashfulness, y/n smiled and placed a hand on his masked cheek.
“You need not be so hard on yourself Baldwin. From what I have heard, you are a strong leader and a brave one too. My father holds much respect for you and I do too. But after this interaction, I hold much more than respect for you and I hope we can speak more tomorrow” the princess said with a smile.
Baldwin took her hand in his, holding it to his chest.
“I would love that more than you will ever know, princess”.
The two said their goodnights and retired to their chambers, each with a warm feeling of anticipation for what the next day would bring.
But the young king couldn't sleep. His mind was flooded with different scenarios.
Maybe she did want to marry him? But if she did, their marriage would be short and surely childless. Wouldn't that put her off being wed to him if she were to spend half of her life as a widow?
That night Baldwin prayed and prayed to God on his knees for a second chance. For a second chance at life, to be wed to y/n, to live a normal life with her.
He begged until he couldn't think anymore. Staggering over to his bed, Baldwin fell into a deep sleep. Morning came in no time.
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The following morning, Baldwin awoke as usual. But something was different.
He felt happy, he felt excited and looked forward to the day ahead.
He got out of his bed on his own and dressed himself before the physicians arrived, who were shocked to see him so mobile without immense pain so early in the day.
Y/n was much the same.
Since first laying eyes on the young king, her heart belonged to him. Before seeing Baldwin for the first time, the idea of marriage disgusted her. She didn't want to end up like her friends, forced into a relationship with a man far older than her who controlled her every move.
But after seeing and speaking to him, the idea of marriage seemed amazing. He was so kind and sweet but he seemed so sad.
She wanted more than anything to be the one who would make him happy. She knew of his leprosy as many did but that didn't bother her in the slightest. All she saw was a kind and gentle soul in need of love.
When y/n arrived at Baldwin’s chambers, he was overjoyed to see her. They spent the entire day together, talking and laughing, walking around the courtyard and playing chess. 
By evening, neither wanted the day to end. Neither wanted to leave each other's side at all for that matter.
But one good thing happened that evening and that was Baldwin requesting her hand in marriage (with the blessing of her father of course). Y/n grinned with delight and accepted without hesitation.
As the two spoke together on the couch in Baldwin’s chambers, the sun sank below the horizon leaving the kingdom in peaceful darkness.
Baldwin had removed his mask, revealing his bandaged face to her.
Much to his delight, y/n did nothing but compliment him and stare lovingly into his eyes for the whole evening.
As time went on, the young king felt himself growing more and more tired. His eyes struggled to remain open, but he didn't want his soon to be wife to leave.
He wanted her by his side, forever.
Y/n noticed this and smiled at the sleepy expression he wore while she spoke.
“You should get some rest, your highness” she said softly, placing a hand on his thigh.
“But I don't want you to leave,” he replied, his voice suddenly small. Her heart broke for him. So many years feeling alone and unlovable.
Y/n thought for a moment, “I have an idea!” she spoke after a second.
Baldwin looked up at her with curiosity.
“Why don't you get into bed and I will hold you until you fall asleep, then I will leave. Then we have no risk of being accused of adultery!”
A large grin spread across Baldwin's face, it was the cutest thing she had ever seen. “That would be perfect!” he exclaimed.
Baldwin got changed and climbed into bed, laying down on his usual side of the bed. But this time, he tossed the decorative pillows to the floor.
Y/n climbed into the bed beside him, “just get comfortable and I will hold you” she told him, her voice filled with love.
Baldwin nodded and turned on his side away from her, snuggling into the covers with a smile. Y/n waited a moment, then wrapped her arms around him from behind, pulling him closer so his back was pressed against her chest and her head was resting slightly above his, his blonde curls tickled her nose making her giggle with happiness.
“This is everything I have ever wanted,” the young king whispered, his voice gentle and sleepy.
“Likewise, my love. Just rest now, I will just be in my chambers when you wake” y/n replied, pressing a kiss to the back of his head.
Baldwin nodded and yawned, burying himself further into her arms. The young king was fast asleep in no time, lulled into rest by her warmth.
The single sound of a soft snore broke the silence. The quiet sound of rest told the princess that it was time to leave. As much as she didnt want to, she had to.
Unwrapping her arms carefully so as to not wake him, y/n stood and went to leave. But she couldn't, not yet.
Walking over to Baldwin’s side of the bed, she smiled down at his sleeping form.
Y/n bent down and kissed his forehead lightly.
“I can't wait until every night can be like this my darling. Rest well” she whispered before turning to leave.
Retreating into the night with anticipation for what the next day would bring.
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ellethespaceunicorn · 8 months
Text
Something Old, Something New
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Title: Something Old, Something New
Rating: Explicit, 18+, Minors - DNI
Pairing: Nick Fowler x Reader
Fandom: The 355
Word Count: 9.5K (whoopsie)
Summary: Your childhood best friend invites you to your old vacation spot for her wedding, and you have been catching up with your first crush: her recently divorced big brother Nick.
Warnings: infidelity, divorce, recreational drug use (marijuana), drinking, mutual pining, pet names (Gumdrop, baby), praise kink, cunnilingus, unprotected p-in-v sex, mention of bodily fluids (creampie), public sex, if I forgot anything please tell me
A/N1: My tiles for @thebasementspouses VOTM Nick Fowler BINGO were: divorced, best friend’s brother, writer’s choice(prompt #802 from @creativepromptsforwriting), drunken confession, public sex. BINGO card at end of story.
A/N2: I have been working on this story for weeks and I really hope I have done the Nick Fowler fandom justice. It's my first time, and hopefully not the last time, writing for Nick. I thoroughly enjoyed writing him. Unbeta’d, we die like people who tried their best. 
Dividers by: @firefly-graphics
Support/Reblog banner by me
Cover Art by me
My Masterlist
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Three Months Ago
The cardstock was rigid in your hands, the envelope discarded seconds ago. The confetti in the envelope litters around your Chucks as you bring your attention to the words embossed upon the invitation. You had been waiting for this day ever since you received the Save the Date announcement.
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You ran your finger over the pretty lettering, its raised borders were a nice tactile touch. The peaceful pink, whispered white, and mellow merlot of the flowers against a hint of golden accents was a beautiful choice. Not too feminine, nor too masculine.
Turning the invitation over, you found more information. 
‘Accommodations will be completely covered for your 8-night stay at The Ocracoke Harbor Inn by the family of the Bride. You will be staying in the fully-furnished Treasure Chest Cottage. Amenities include full-service linens, complimentary wireless Internet, and guest boat docking. Guests have access to a sound-side beach. Password for WI-FI given upon check-in. Nonsmoking, no pets.’
Leave it to the Fowlers to go nuts and rent out the entire inn for their only daughter’s wedding, you thought to yourself. You were not surprised at all, growing up as a rich girl’s best friend had its perks.
As if on cue, your phone started to play the opening notes of Losing You by Solange to signal an incoming call. Pulling your phone out, you smiled seeing Deanne’s name. You clicked Accept and raised the phone to your ear.
“Hello to the future Mrs. Alexander!” Your cheery demeanor not letting on how jealous you were of your friend’s impending nuptials.
Euphonious laughter rings through the earpiece and you can’t help but join in.
“Girl, can you believe it? I am about to tie the knot, be off the market, and settle down. I’m only 12% nervous about everything so I’m doing great,” she snorted, and suddenly you were a bit less jealous if this kind of anxiety is what she had to deal with, “Anyway, um, I was giving you a call because I wanted to ask if you got your invitation and I also wanted to see if I could save myself time in waiting for your R.S.V.P. and bug and pester you until you agree to let my parents pay for you to come spend a week with us and come to my wedding and–”
“Deanne! Stop with the run-on sentence, doll. Did you think I was gonna pass up this opportunity? God, I love that you chose Ocracoke as your wedding destination. So many vacations were spent getting into all kinds of trouble,” you recalled, images of splashing in the water as kids and lounging on the beach as teens replayed in your mind.
“Yeah. Hey, when we were little girls planning our dream weddings, I was serious when I said I wanted it on the beach on Ocracoke Island. But not in the summer because of bugs and heat, but in the winter so we get that beautiful off-season fresh air,” Deanne mused.
“Dee, it’s gonna be gorgeous. I cannot wait to see you in your stunning dress walking down that aisle. Just know that since I am your oldest friend, you pretty much owe me the bouquet,” you laughed, only half-joking.
“As far as I’m concerned, it’s already yours,” she bantered, clearing her throat before speaking again, “So, I also called because I wanted to vent a little, if that’s okay?”
“It’s always okay. You doing alright?” you asked, now worried that your friend was in trouble.
“Yeah, no, I’m fine. I have an update on Nick and Tori, though,” she paused, allowing your mind to wander.
The mention of your first crush’s name sent a shiver down your back. Many a moment had been wasted thinking about his pretty smile and grayish-blue eyes. You’d liked Nick before you knew you even liked boys. He was the heartthrob that trumped every teen dream of every other girl in America’s heart. In your mind, he was the closest to perfect you could imagine. 
You responded, “Oh?”
“So, their divorce is finalized. My big brother is officially a divorcé. I would have thought that a man who was with someone for so long might be partying it up right now. But he says he’s focusing on work and, I don’t know. I just want him to be happy. And like, he’s getting divorced as I’m getting married and it feels so weird. It doesn’t seem fair,” she lamented.
“Dee, come on. You know Nicky wouldn’t want you to think like that. He loves you. You’re his favorite sibling,” you jested, trying to lighten the mood.
“Ha ha. I’m his only sibling. I better be his favorite,” Dee chuckled, happy to be distracted, “So that brings me to you, Miss Missy. Last I heard, you were dating some engineer guy? Do I get to meet him soon?”
You inwardly cringed, hopes dashed of being able to avoid the topic of your relationship status. Things with Curtis kind of fizzled out when you found his tongue down an intern’s throat. You had been bringing him dinner since he’d complained about the late nights at the office.
Turns out he was hungry for more than your baked ziti. 
You explained all this to Dee, remembering the look on Curtis’ face when you poured the prepared food into his lap. He was so shook, it was beautiful.
“I didn’t want to waste all that food but he looked wonderful with my pasta all over his shirt and pants. He honestly deserved it. It was his favorite shirt too. I hope those stains never come out,” you huffed, feeling like you were right back in that office again.
“I have never been so proud of you. I wish I could put hot sauce in his underwear for hurting my girl. I’m sure if I just had a few minutes, I could come up with something more diabolical than that. But it’s what I have at a moment’s notice,” she retorted.
One thing you could always count on Dee for? Getting angry for you and using her beautiful and educated mind to come up with some way to make the person who slighted you pay for their misdeeds. It was both adorable and super embarrassing to have her tiny frame looking up into some bully’s face pointing her finger at them.
“Well, I appreciate your offer, but he is so not worth the energy. You have much better things to think about, like your wedding day. This is your cue to stop worrying about me, Dee,” you advised, a stern tone coloring your words.
“Fine, I will stop worrying about you out loud. You got it, girl. Anyway, I won’t hold you. Talk soon, ok? I miss you,” she said, and you could envision her getting bleary-eyed.
“I miss you too, Dee. We’ll get together soon, I promise,” you sighed, feeling guilty for letting your friendship dwindle over the years.
“I’ll hold you to it. Bye, babe,” she hummed.
“Bye.” You hang up the phone and close your eyes. Visions of what Dee will look like in her wedding dress cloud your thoughts. Little snippets of grayish-blue eyes and dark brown hair seep in and you can almost hear his laugh again. You open your eyes, blinking away the mental images that brought you joy for a moment.
‘This is fine,’ you thought to yourself. Yeah, totally. You’re only going to see your best friend from childhood get married, effectively ending your childhood with a pretty bow on top. You also were only going to be with the biggest crush you ever had for like, an entire week. 
And he’s single. 
And probably needy. 
And...you had better get your jaw up off the floor if you were going to get anything done.
Three months is enough time to get your brain, your body, and your emotions in check before you make a fool out of yourself in front of your second family.
Right?
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January 20th, 2024 – Day One
Standing on the deck of the Hatteras Ferry, you watch as Ocracoke Island comes into view. The sun is at its highest and you are thankful for your sunglasses shielding the the bright sunlight bouncing off the crystal clear waters. You can taste the salty air and you are instantly transported to memories of running around the decks of this ferry with Deanne and Nick while your mothers tried in vain to wrangle you all.
The island comes into view and you search the docks for a familiar face. Dee promised to meet you at the docks, but when you approach them she is nowhere to be found. You pull your luggage behind you as your shoulder bag decides to slide off.
Before it can hit the ground, it’s caught by the strap by a strong hand at the same time you reach out to grab it. You thank the kind stranger as you both stand to your full height and you are face-to-face with a grown-ass Nicholas Fowler. He says something and you don’t hear hide nor hair of what the hell he just said, you look at him and break into a smile and he chuckles and speaks again.
“I hope you don’t mind Dee got me to pick you up. She had some wedding stuff to do. I wasn’t listening,” he explains, adjusting his sunglasses and putting your bag on his shoulder. He gestures over to his black Lamborghini Urus. 
Once you walk over, he puts your shoulder bag in the back seat. You step closer to him to hand him your rolling luggage. You are mesmerized as his strong forearms flex when he puts everything in the SUV. 
You clear your throat and look around when he looks back at you, catching you watching him. He closes the back door and guides you to the passenger side, opening your door for you.
“Oh, you’re a full-service driver today, huh?” you joke, stepping past him. Your platform espadrilles clacking on the asphalt. Adjusting your strapless sundress, you climb in.
“Whatever service you require, Gumdrop,” he replies with a smile, making sure you are comfortable before closing your door.
That fucking nickname… He would call you gumdrop instead of your name more often than not. That’s all, he didn’t mean anything by it, right?
When you are both buckled in, you start the drive across the island. Comfortable conversation is easy between you two. It’s like you fall back into a safe space with him. You talk about old vacations, funny moments, and what you both are up to these days. Neither of you mentions either of your failed relationships and you can’t keep the smile off of your face.
“Hey, we still have an hour until check-in. You wanna grab a bite or go to the beach or something?” he suggests.
“Are you sure they’re not waiting for us?” you counter, wondering if it’s a good idea to have a little moment with Nick all to yourself.
“I’d rather ask for forgiveness than permission. No pressure, just a suggestion,” he presses, taking a second to look over at you and smile that smile that has had you in a chokehold most of your life.
After thinking about it for all of five seconds, you agree to have lunch at Plum Pointe Kitchen. You enjoy a generous helping of Drunken Chicken nachos while Nick gets the VooDoo Shrimp PO’Boy. You share half of your meal, and Nick refuses to let you pay for anything.
Making your way to the Ocracoke Harbor Inn after lunch, you finally meet up with everyone. Dee is in mid-conversation with someone when she sees you and Nick pull up into the parking lot. She walks over to you and pulls you into a very tight embrace. It’s like everything was chaos before you got here.
“Oh my goodness, I am so glad you are here. How was the trip? Did you eat? Did Nick bore you? I’m sorry that I couldn’t come and meet you, but we had a little mishap with the reservation for the hotel and then I thought I left my wedding dress at home, and then we–”
You cut off Dee before she can work herself into a frenzy again, “Dee! Breathe. You’re gonna be fine, I promise. And is that Matthew? Introduce me already, would you?” you encourage, trying to get your friend’s mind off of the previous debacle and onto the man walking over.
Dee introduces you to Matthew and he charms you with the way he dotes on Dee. He seems like the type to be able to handle her rambling and intense emotions. How he looks at her while she speaks makes you miss having someone look at you like that.
“Well, it’s just about 3 o’clock now. Let’s get checked in and settled, then we can get together later?” Matthew chimes in.
“Sounds good,” Nick agrees, turning to you, “Go ahead and leave your stuff in my car. I’ll take you to your cottage after we are all checked in.” You nod, trying to hide your excitement. 
Once you are done with the receptionist, you get your key and the wifi password to your cottage. While waiting for everyone else to get done, you fiddle on your phone until Nick’s shadow looms over you. Looking up, you are greeted with his eyes no longer shielded by his sunglasses in the dim lobby.
“You ready, Gumdrop? We still have some time before Mom and Dad show up. And I think I remember Dee saying she would call when she was ready to go out,” he concludes, putting his hands in his pockets and rocking on his heels.
If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was nervous about something. But you don’t push.
“All set,” you say, smiling up at him feeling bold enough to wrap your arm around his while you walk out of the lobby.
Dee shouts after you to behave yourselves and tense up a bit while Nick chuckles, seemingly amused by his sister’s thinly veiled comment on two single adults being close. Damn them.
Nick opens the passenger side door for you again, closing it once you are safely inside. He drives to the Margaritaville Cottage where he will stay with his parents during the trip. He instructs you to stay in the car while he just drops his bags off and is back outside in a few minutes.
The next stop is your cottage, called the Treasure Chest. You snicker at the name, thinking it sounded more like a pirate-themed strip joint. When Nick asks what you’re laughing about, you tell him your thoughts on the name of where you are staying. The slow smile that spreads on his face makes you involuntarily clench your thighs, wondering what his days-old stubble would feel like between your legs.
He tilts his head just slightly at you, then turns back to the road, smile still intact. Luckily the drive is short as the cottages are fairly close to one another. Nick parks in the driveway and you both get out and stretch your legs. He comes around and grabs your shoulder bag and luggage, motioning for you to lead the way.
Walking up the steps to the door, you unlock it and are welcomed by the scent of fresh linen. The central air of the cottage is just this side of perfect and you drop your purse on the dining room table. Turning around, you see Nick walking into a room off of the living room.
“Holy shit, you got a King-sized bed,” he shouts from the bedroom.
Walking in, you sit at the foot of the bed next to Nick and start to untie your shoes. He follows suit and turns to you biting his lip, a question at the tip of his tongue.
Facing him, you ask, “What? Do I have something on my face?” 
“No. I, uh...I’m surprised you haven’t asked yet,” he notes. At your confusion, he holds up his left ring finger. A band of untanned skin around the base clues you in that he’s talking about his divorce.
“Nicky, I would never make you talk about it. It can’t be easy in that situation. I mean, I only broke up with Curtis a few months ago and we were only together for six months. I couldn’t imagine how a divorce feels after how long you and Tori were together,” you insist, placing a hand on his knee.
He covers your hand with his and nods. “Mom and Dad are pretty good about it. They don’t ask me how I’m doing with that sad look in their eyes anymore. But Dee? Jesus, when I told her about the incident, she was out for blood. I had to end up calming her down. All because someone broke her big bro’s heart. Love her, but she can get a little carried away,” he finishes.
“This is not to make you feel like you need to share, but you mentioned “the incident” and now I’m curious. Feel free to tell me to shut the fuck up. But I caught Curtis with his tongue down another woman’s throat. I don’t know for sure how long it had been going on or if they had done anything else together, but I knew at that moment that I was done. I am worth more than that. And so are you, Nicky,” you encourage, feeling a bit of weight lift off your shoulders after finally talking about your breakup.
“My situation was similar. Tori had been cheating on me for the last two years of our marriage with her boss. I had a feeling something was up, just didn’t want to believe it was something like this,” he reveals, continuing, “But I am moving on, so to speak. I’m not holding out anymore for her to come crawling back to me with a sad story and all that. Even though I hope that she falls in a sinkhole.”
You both laugh and continue talking, taking your minds off of your breakups. You reminisce about all of the times you’ve stayed on the island during vacations. You giggle over dumb stories of you all as teens in high school, hiding weed from your parents and drinking on the beach til it was time to sneak back into the hotel.
You get an idea and you tell Nick to give you a minute before you go back into the living room to retrieve your purse. Coming back into the bedroom, you pull out a vape pen and wiggle it in front of Nick’s face, a devilish smirk on your lips.
“We’ll just take one hit each and we will be fine. Just a bit more mellow,” you offer, pulling him to the balcony off of the living room. You each occupy a wicker chair and you hand over the device.
“Gumdrop, you little devil,” he takes the pen from you and inhales, closing his eyes and holding the smoke in his lungs before letting it out. The smoke dissipates quickly and you can see the weight lift off of his shoulders. Handing it back to you, he exhales loudly and leans back in his chair.
Putting the tip in your mouth, you hit the button and inhale. Warm vapor fills you and you release the button, holding in the smoke for a beat and then letting it out toward the sky. You put the pen down on the table between you and fold your legs under you, letting your dress cascade down.
Sitting in companionable silence with Nick feels great. Neither of you feels the need to talk while you listen to the sounds of nature around you. People walking around the cottages, cars driving by, and the distant waves from Pamlico Sound make you wish you had gone to the beach earlier.
“Fuck, that was only one hit and I feel like my bones are made of jelly,” you remark, swaying to a song that isn’t playing with your eyes closed.
Nick looks over to you and smiles, “Must be jelly ‘cause jam don’t shake like that.”
You open your eyes and turn to him, your mouth twitches before you break out into uncontrollable laughter. Nick soon follows and you both are taken over by the giggles. You settle down soon enough, still feeling the buzzing calmness of being high.
“The world needs more people like you,” you beam.
“Nah, I like being unique,” he replies, his phone chiming. Picking up a video call from Dee, “Hey Sis.”
“Hey, me and Matt were gonna go for dinner and drinks, you in?” she asks.
“Yeah, that sounds...good,” Nick answers for himself while looking at you to get your answer.
“Ok, well get ready and meet us at Oyster Company. And tell my best friend that she is coming, no ifs, ands, or buts. See you both soon!” With that, she ends the call.
“So...our decision has been made for us. Do you need to change or anything?” Nick wonders, gesturing to your traveling attire.
“If I take this dress off, I am not going out. Besides, I like this dress. I think I look positively adorable. But I will change my shoes to something more comfortable,” you finish before Nick can comment on how he also likes your dress. You pick up the vape pen, make your way back to your luggage, and pull out some flat sandals.
Once you are ready, you make your way back outside and are surprised to see Dee and Matt parked on the street outside of your cottage. “We decided to pick you up. Matt is DD tonight, so we can all get a little loosey-goosey. Plus, I can always tell when Nick is high, so get in losers!”
Nick snorts, and you are mortified to be found out, but you quickly get over it once you are in the backseat of Matt’s Audi Q4. The short ride to the restaurant was spent with Nick’s left leg brushing against your right leg. He was either manspreading or he wanted to touch you and wanted to keep it under the radar.
Either way, you were excited to feel his warmth next to you.
When you make it to the restaurant, you sit at a high table and it almost feels like a double date. Especially when your waitress congratulates Dee and Matt on their wedding while remarking that you and Nick make a cute couple as well. Your face warms up and you suddenly feel like every eye is on you. 
Nick comes to your rescue, answering the waitress with a smile, “My girl’s a bit shy, is all. Can we get a pitcher of beer for the table to start? And also two shots of Crown Royal Vanilla for me and the little lady. Thanks.”
If it was possible, you would have melted through the floor and evaporated, but instead, you just hide behind the menu until Nick pokes his head in.
“That wasn’t to embarrass you, I swear. But I got nervous that she was gonna try and flirt with me, so I dragged you under the proverbial bus with me,” he admits, his lopsided smile only making you want him more.
“Fine. You’ll just have to make it up to me,” you warn, a devious grin appearing on your face. 
You put down your menu just as the waitress comes back with the drinks. Taking both shots, you hand one to Nick. Staring in each other’s eyes, you clink your shot glasses and then tap them on the table before taking the shot. The sweet burn of the liquor warms you from within while Nick’s eyes on you melt whatever nerves you had previously.
A cleared throat breaks your trance, your focus changing from Nick to Dee.
“I talked to Mom and Dad and they won’t get here ‘til Friday afternoon with the rest of the guests. Dad said he had a few things to take care of and not to worry. Of course, I worry tenfold because he told me not to,” Dee interjects, busying herself with pouring beer into her frosted glass.
“Baby, they’ll be here as soon as they can. Don’t you worry your pretty little head about anything,” Matt insists, moving a strand of hair away from Dee’s face before kissing her.
“Promise to keep me occupied?” she requests, a sinful smile on her face.
“I do,” he jokes, clearly proud of himself for making his fiancée blush.
“First of all, how dare you? Secondly, that was almost too cute so watch yourself,” she laughs.
You roll your eyes at the happy couple and smile, going back to looking over the menu. The waitress comes back to the table and takes your orders. Over the meal, you get to know Matt a bit more and you can see how Dee fell in love with him. He’s intelligent, funny, and charismatic. The way he talks about and to her makes you so happy to know your friend found love.
When they turn to talk to each other, you and Nick spark up a conversation about work. He tells you what he can about working for the government, keeping the specific details to himself. You regale him with stories of your time as a freelance writer. You’ve written for dozens of publications, but you just want to get your original works out there for people to enjoy. 
After mentioning a few pieces you wrote for GQ, Nick expressed interest in reading your articles. You try and downplay your skills, but he presses you for the links. Taking out your phone, you realize that you don’t have his number. 
While you exchange digits with Nick, you are too busy to notice Dee casting a sidelong glance and smiling to herself. You ramble on as you send him link after link of some of your favorites. With your face in your phone, you don’t notice the way Nick looks at you with a mix of pride and hunger.
“Well, I am ready to call it a night,” Dee yawns, getting everyone’s attention, “But I could use a nightcap. Who’s up for a trip to the ABC Store? We can make it before they close.”
Everyone agrees and after the check is paid, you all pile into Matt’s SUV for the quick drive to the liquor store. You browse the aisles for a bit by yourself. Filling up your basket with a bottle of wine, some whiskey, and a six-pack of hard seltzers, you surmise that this will sustain you for the week ahead and go in search of the others.
You find Nick in front of the beer cooler, hard at work trying to decide between a 12-pack of Sam Adams’ Cold Snap and Harpoon’s Long Thaw. You suggest he get both and he agrees.
Meeting Dee and Matt up at the front of the store, you stand next to Nick in line and he laughs at the contents of your shopping basket. He puts his beer up for the cashier to scan and has you do the same, paying for your items. 
A little piece of you feels taken care of and you thank him while continuing to tell him he doesn’t have to. He just shushes you and says you can make it up to him later. Before your mind can think about what that might entail, the sale is rung and bagged. Nick picks up the beer and you grab the bag of your things.
Nick asks Matt to just drop him off at your cottage since he left his car there. His cottage is literally next door, but you’re not exactly gonna deny yourself the company. Dee and Matt drive away and you turn back to Nick. You both laugh nervously and you surprise yourself by speaking up.
“So, um. I was gonna have a weed and whiskey moment to myself, but I’d be willing to share if you’re interested,” you hint, watching as he weighs his options. 
“Lead the way, Gumdrop,” he replies.
He follows you in, closing the door behind him. He puts his beer into the fridge along with your hard seltzer. You put the wine on the counter and take out the whiskey while Nick finds two short glasses in the cabinet. Pouring a generous amount in each one, he offers you a drink and you take a sip of the amber liquid. 
Letting the whiskey sit in your mouth, you savor the hints of vanilla and spice. You reach in your purse for your vape pen and take a hit of it before offering it to Nick. Taking a long pull off of the pen, he exhales and you watch as his shoulders relax. You both take another sip of whiskey and revel in the dual flavors of the weed and whiskey.
You take your glass and the bottle, moving onto the patio off of the living room, and sit down in one of the wicker chairs while Nick takes the other. The conversation comes easily enough. Mostly high thoughts and random memories come to mind. After a while, you put on some music and when 6 Underground by Sneaker Pimps comes on, you can’t help but dance in your chair.
Nick stares while you close your eyes and move your hands to the trip-hop classic. You spend the entire song moving to the downtempo beat and enjoying your crossfade. The trance you were under slowly dissipates as the song ends and Pendulum by FKA Twigs starts.
When you open your eyes, Nick is pulling you to stand up. You’re lost as to what he is doing until his hands go to yours, pulling them to rest around his neck while he holds your hips. As the song continues, you follow his slow lead and sway to the intimate and mesmerizing indie hit.
🎶
You're younger than I am broken
I dance feelings like they're spoken
So my conversation's not enough
So lonely trying to be yours
Running through sliding doors
So lonely trying to be yours
When you're looking for so much more
🎶
By the time the song ends, the heat between you is unmistakable. Your hand tangles in his hair when he pulls you impossibly closer. Mere centimeters separate your lips. All you would need is to lean just one step closer and you’d finally get to taste his kiss.
Nick beats you to it and his hands pull your face to his, crashing your lips together. You can’t hold back the moan that escapes your lips and he swallows it adding in his own grunts and groans. Kiss after kiss, you radiate carnality and passion. 
Breaking the kiss, you watch as he licks his puffy bottom lip. You take in a breath of air and prepare to dive back in but Nick voices his thoughts.
“You are gonna be the death of me, Gumdrop,” he sighs, and at your brows furrowing he continues, “You’ve only been back in my life for a day and I’m already thinking of ways to keep you in it. Don’t hate me, but I think we should chill out, just for tonight. I swear, if you still want this by tomorrow night, I am all yours. But you better be all mine. Please, tell me you can wait for me?”
“Tomorrow night and you’re all mine?” you plead, and he nods.
“Less than 24 hours, baby. Show me that these feelings aren’t just from the substances in our system,” he insists, and you wanna fuck him even more now after he says that.
You nod and he speaks up, “Need to hear your words, baby, like a big girl.”
“Fuck...yes, I can wait. I can wait for you, Nicky,” you whimper and he rests his forehead against yours. 
“That’s my good girl,” he praises, lifting his head from yours, “Now, why don’t we call it a night before I go back on my word? You look so good in this dress and I really wanna be good.”
Agreeing with him, you clean up your empty glasses and move the bottle to the counter next to the wine. Nick pulls you into him one last time, snaking a hand down to your ass and grabbing a hefty portion of it before a hardy slap lands on your left cheek. He only snickers at your yelp and nibbles on your bottom lip. 
“Keep that same energy for me because tomorrow I’m not holding back,” he vows, and if you weren’t leaning into him, your legs would’ve surely buckled. If he notices the tremble go through your body, he makes no mention of it and for that you are grateful.
“Goodnight, Nicky,” you hum.
“Sleep tight, Gumdrop. And do me a favor?” he challenges, at your nod he continues, “Save it for me. I’m gonna take care of you tomorrow, so no need to touch that kitty tonight, right?”
You let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding, “Right.”
He leaves and once the door is closed, you lean back against it, your hand going to your neck where your pulse is playing a sick beat against your skin.
Less than 24 hours, you think. You got this.
That night, you dream of grayish-blue eyes and large hands roaming your body.
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January 21st, 2024 – Day Two 
You wake just before 10:30 am and are greeted with a good morning text from Nick. He lets you know that he is taking you out, just the two of you. Since Dee and Matt are enjoying a couple’s spa package, he figures it would only be right to hit some of your favorite places on the island.
You are dressed and out the door by noon. Nick takes you to pick up lunch at Taqueria 504 Suazo’s and you drive out to rent a Jeep Gladiator at for a few hours to drive on the beach. One of the best things about this island is that everything is so close. After 5 minutes, you are at your destination. 
Nick drives out a ways past the other people enjoying the off-season and stops about a minute after the last two fishermen you see. Guess he wanted a secluded spot, you think to yourself. While you get the food, Nick grabs the beach chairs and umbrella that he rented. The ocean breeze is agreeable enough, but you are glad that you brought a thin sweater to keep the chill off.
Once you sit down, you hand over Nick’s food and he digs into his burrito while you munch on your fish tacos. When your meal is finished, Nick puts your leftovers in the Gladiator and lets down the truck bed. He beckons you over and helps you sit on the edge and he climbs up and sits next to you while you both look at the water.
“Ya know, the last time we came out here I was just finishing my third year at Virginia Tech. You and Dee were seniors. I remember hoping upon hope that you would apply to VT and I remember you telling me you were accepting a scholarship from Princeton. I just sucked it up and congratulated you. Even though I was hoping you would understand why I wanted you close, I was so proud of you for venturing off on your own. You were always one to go after what you wanted. I just couldn’t stop wanting to be what you wanted,” he confesses, looking off into the water.
“I wanted you, Nicky. Trust me, I did. But I was so afraid that I had a dumb little crush on someone who would never see me as someone other than his little sister’s best friend. The last time I saw you, I thought it was right to push away the idea of you ever having feelings for me. I also may have been afraid of what Dee would say. She’s kind of protective over both of us, ya know?” you finish.
“That girl can be a vicious little thing when she wants to,” he chuckles, shaking his head, “But don’t you think it’s kind of a sign that she had me pick you up from the ferry? And how suddenly today, we have a free schedule to do whatever we want together? I know my sister, and she’s done this before. She matched me up with my high school girlfriend, Beth.”
“Ugh, Beth with the braces and bangs. I used to call her Triple B behind your back. I hated her so much,” you mutter, trying to push the image of them kissing out of your mind.
“Yeah, well. I knew you hated her, but me being an idiot teenager didn’t exactly know that meant you liked me. I just thought you didn’t like her because she was kind of a bitch. She was plenty nice to me, but she could be...a little scary, at times,” he laughs, surprising himself.
“So...you think Dee would be ok with...this?” you say, gesturing between the two of you.
“I just think there is no way she would let us be alone together if she wasn’t halfway hoping it would work out,” he guesses, “Plus, honestly? We’re adults. We’re allowed to go after what makes us happy.”
A slow smile spreads across your face and you pull Nick in for a kiss. You don’t want to jinx it but he makes you happy too. The way he looks at you like you hung the moon, the way he listens to you and asks questions and the way he kisses you? 
It just has to be real.
Packing up your beach equipment, you head back to drop off everything. Getting back into his SUV, you head around the island and view some of the sights. You go shopping and pick up some new knick knacks to take home. Visiting the lighthouse, you take some photos and make sure to bring Dee and Matt here before you leave the island.
Since most of the island’s restaurants are closed on Sundays, you venture to Ocracoke Variety Store and opt for cooking dinner together. After you have all the ingredients you need for a simple fish fry, you head back to your cottage and you and Nick get your hands dirty.
You have him cutting up potatoes for steak fries while you are preparing the batter for the fish. When dinner is ready, you sit at the dining room table with soft music playing in the background. While Nick wanted to take you out for your first date, he could appreciate the quiet setting with just the two of you enjoying each other’s company.
Finishing your meal, Nick takes your hand and kisses your knuckles. You smile and warmth radiates in your cheeks. You hate to admit it, but you wish you had a little liquid courage right now. But the nerves you feel only cement that this is happening.
He pulls you up from your seat, the hunger in his eyes evident from his blown-wide pupils. Leading you into the bedroom, he stops just short of the end of the bed. Standing behind you as you face the bed, he runs his hands down your bare arms and whispers in your ear.
“I cannot wait to take you apart, Gumdrop. But,” he starts, turning you around to face him, “First, I just want to take my time and worship this beautiful body I know you’re hiding from me.”
If he wasn’t holding you up, you would have melted into the carpet. But he’s there with firm hands and a gentle grip. Helping you out of your dress, he lays it on the chair in the corner. Coming back, he admires the white lace bra and panty set that accentuates your body shape.
His lips come back to yours, tasting your desire and wantonness with every kiss. Wrapping an arm around you, he guides you to lay back on the bed while maintaining the liplock. He kisses down your neck and across your collarbone while his hand unclasps your bra and removes it from your body.
Laying a kiss between your breasts draws a quick inhale from you. You can tell he’s proud of himself when he looks up at you while he licks one pert nipple, the other between his thumb and forefinger. He sucks on it as if he could siphon gold from your tits. Switching to the other, he gives it the same attention. 
The noises that come from him as he plays with your breasts are enough to make you shiver. He whimpers when you moan and throw your head back. He groans when he kisses down your belly, stopping to look up at you before he plants a quick kiss upon your covered mound.
He pulls down your panties at such an agonizing speed. Nick has to squeeze his dick through his pants when a string of your wetness stretches from your pussy to your underwear. Spreading your legs apart, he feasts on the view of your lips opening like a flower before him.
He wanted to go slow, he really did. But once he flattens his tongue and licks up from your entrance to your swollen nub, he is mesmerized by the taste of you. He goes back and forth between sucking on your button and lapping up whatever nectar drips from you. You can feel yourself inching toward the finish line, and he is right there to talk you through it.
“Fuck...you taste like Heaven...that’s right, baby...let go and cum for me like a good girl,” he commands between licks and kisses.
You’re nothing if not a good listener and seconds later, your walls are clamping around his fingers. You’ve never cum like this before and it washes over you like a warm waterfall. He removes his fingers from your wet opening and sucks them clean before moving up the bed to kiss you.
Tasting yourself on his tongue, you are beyond turned on. You tug at the hem of his shirt and he sits up to pull it off. Running your hands over his chest, you pull at the button of his pants.
“Use your words,” he urges, his hands stopping yours from moving further.
“Need to feel you, Nick. Please fuck me,” you beg, all thoughts gone from your head.
“There’s my good girl,” he replies, standing up from the bed to undress fully. Climbing back on the bed, he kneels between your legs. He strokes himself slowly, eight inches of uncut cock staring you in the face. He squeezes the base and you can tell he is just as excited as you are.
You crook a finger at him and once again, he is on top of you. With nothing between you, you’re impossibly close and you only want to get closer. Your hand soon finds his erection and he hisses at the contact, groaning when you stroke him.
He leans on one forearm while his other hand guides his tip between your lips, gathering some of your slick before entering you. You both groan loudly once he is fully settled inside you. 
“You good, baby?” he asks, anxious to start moving his hips.
“God, yes. Fuck me, Nicky,” you plead, feeling so full when you arch your back.
Foregoing words, Nick retracts his hips and thrusts into you. The wet squelch as he fucks you is music to your ears, just like the way he tells you how beautiful you are in between kisses. He uses your breasts as handholds while he pummels your snatch.
The way he looks into your eyes while he plunges inside you excites you so much that you don’t even notice when a tear escapes your eye. He kisses it away, trailing his lips to your neck where he sucks at your pulse point. At this point, you couldn't care less about a hickey. You just want to be his.
Your next orgasm surprises you and you squeeze his cock from the inside, coating him in your cream. 
“Good girl, coming all over my fucking dick. Feels so fucking good when you tighten around me like that. You are taking me so well, Gumdrop. Yes. You. Are,” he grunts, punctuating the last three words with deep thrusts inside you.
Flipping you over so you are on top, Nick grabs your hips and you start to ride him. You bounce on his cock like it’s the last time you get to fuck. By the mewls coming from him, you are doing it just right.
You feel another climax on its way, slowly building up in your core. Nick swats your hand away when you go to rub your clit. He licks his thumb and massages your neglected pearl until you are unable to hold it in any longer. The dual stimulation is too much and you gush, soaking Nick’s abdomen and your thighs.
“Oh fuck, baby. Such a good fucking girl for me. You must want my cum inside you with the way you’re...riding my dick. Shit, baby, I’m gonna blow. Where do you want it, baby?” he asks, you reply by doubling down on your hip motions.
“Right there, Nicky. Cum inside me, please,” you implore breathlessly.
“Yes, baby. Gonna cum for you, gonna fill you up so good. Ugh, fuck, here it comes,” he whimpers, his hold on your hips so tight to keep you close to him. 
You feel every twitch of his cock, his muscles pulling taut across his arms and chest as he floods your canal. Your name on his lips as he comes down is a badge of honor. Yes, you did that shit.
He pulls you down to kiss him, shallow thrusts keeping him semi-hard before he pulls out. He lays you down next to him, cuddling you close and kissing your forehead. You start to fall asleep but you can feel Nick moving off the bed. Your hand shoots out to grab for him, but he shushes you.
He goes into the bathroom and you hear the faucet running before he comes out with a wet washcloth. Wiping down your sensitive folds, he takes care of you so well. Putting the washcloth back in the bathroom, he comes back and helps you get under the covers and he snuggles in with you.
With your arms and legs entangled in one another, you drift off peacefully.
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January 22nd – January 26th 2024 
The days before the wedding are spent enjoying the island with Nick, Dee, and Matt before the other guests arrive. More than once, Dee has cornered both you and Nick, asking embarrassing questions. You both say nothing, feigning ignorance even though Nick has moved into your cottage over the week, abandoning the cottage that he was supposed to share with his parents.
That being said, once his parents do finally make it to the island, he doesn’t even try and act like he isn’t staying with you. The smile on his father’s face says it all, he approves. His mother is far too preoccupied with getting everyone together for the wedding rehearsal to notice anything. 
That is until she catches you and Nick making heart eyes at each other as you stand in for the Bride and Groom in rehearsal. Yes, it was a bit too soon to be playing Wedding Day with a man whose divorce is less than 100 days old.
But when you know, you know.
At dinner, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and you don’t notice Nick following after you. Before you can enter the ladies’ room, a hand on your arm pulls you into the nearby gender-neutral bathroom.
You turn around and are met with hungry eyes before he descends upon you. Turning you around to face the mirror, he puts your hands on the sink and sinks to his knees, his hands roaming under your dress and up your legs until he pulls down your panties. He pulls out his already hard dick and pumps himself a few times before sliding inside you.
“Don’t fucking move, baby. Keep looking at yourself in the mirror, and your hands stay right where they are. You thought you could get away with teasing me in this tight fucking dress,” he breathes, “I want you to watch yourself while I fuck you til you’re dripping for me like the good girl I know you can be.”
When he places his hands on your hips, he begins a steady pace. He watches you in the mirror as your orgasm takes you over without warning. You squeeze him, your walls fluttering and coaxing him to follow you when you cover him in your juices.
But he surprises you when he pulls out and pulls your panties back up. When you turn around to ask why, he only kisses you and whispers in your ear, “I’ll get mine later, don’t you worry.” That only fills you with a little dread, your legs still wobbly as Nick tucks himself away and straightens his outfit. “Can’t have them knowing I just got my dick wet, right baby? See you back out there.” 
He exits the bathroom and leaves you with slick running down your legs and your brain falling out of your ears. And he’s worried about you being the death of him?
You straighten yourself and use the bathroom for its intended purpose. Once back in the banquet hall, you pray to any god who will listen that you don’t look like you just got some dick. You see Nick and Matt in a conversation like he’d been here the whole time. When Dee asks why you look flustered, you lie and say you’re just a bit tired.
Nick overhears you talking to Dee and interjects himself into the conversation, “Why don’t we go get some fresh air? Don’t worry, Sis, I’ll take care of her.” Helping you out of your chair, you both say goodnight to those at dinner.
Nick takes you back to the cottage, pulling you behind him as he walks out onto the balcony. Crashing his lips to yours, his hands scrunch up the fabric of your dress until you feel the night air chill your skin. 
“Hands on the railing, baby,” he says, peeling your soaked panties from you.
Nick’s pushing inside you in the next breath and it’s like he belonged there all along. Holding onto your hips, he begins his onslaught. All you can do is hold yourself up and be happy that no one is walking down this road because fuck they would be able to see you getting absolutely railed without abandon.
Your grip on the railing is faltering as he slams into you and he takes pity on you. He uses the grip on your hips to pull you back so you sit on his lap while he sits in the wicker chair. He moves you up and down on his dick while saying the filthiest things to you.
Once your climax hits, his pace falters and he thrusts up into you. His tip hits your cervix as he pumps you full. He holds you against him and kisses up your neck as you lay back on his chest. For a few moments, all you both can do is breathe and caress each other.
His dick slips free of you and you feel his load dripping from your thoroughly used hole. 
“Come with me back to Virginia,” he whispers, surprising both of you, “Don’t say no just yet. Think about it. We don’t leave for a couple of days. I have not been this happy in a very long while and I think I make you happy too. Just think about it, Gumdrop.”
A million things go through your head at the thought of giving up your life in New Jersey. This was a big step after only a week of playing house. Your brain comes up with so many what-ifs and reasons to not leap. But then one thought sticks, and you smile.
When you know, you know.
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January 27th, 2024 – Wedding Day
You were never a big crier, but you shed many tears watching your childhood best friend marry the love of her life. It fills you with hope that everything does happen for a reason. While listening to their vows, you wonder if you could ever make that type of commitment. At that moment, Nick squeezes your hand and you smile up at him. Like he could read your mind, he seems to always know what to do to give you comfort.
Then again, he has known you most of his life. And when you think about it, it has always been him. A distant memory replays in your head of him simply putting a band-aid on your skinned knee when you were nine and he was twelve. Even then, he was there for you with a smile and a friendly hug.
The wedding reception is an all-out party but you expect nothing less from the Fowlers. The music, the food, and the atmosphere are perfect. Dee enjoys herself and is just happy to be married to Matt. And you are so happy for her, to see her without a care in the world. 
Nick focuses on you the entire night, making sure you are comfortable and that you have everything you need. You sit in his lap, effectively confirming any rumors that may have spread about you two. His hand on your knee is warm and you want to sneak out of here and take him to the nearest closet. But he doesn’t let you move an inch once he has you in his clutches.
The wedding photographer snaps a pic of you squealing when Nick plants a sloppy kiss on your cheek. The guests around you simultaneously swoon and groan, depending on their relationship status. Not that you care, you had your man. That’s all that matters.
After the wedding, you and Nick sneak off to a secluded area of the beach to look up at the stars. Taking off your shoes, you don’t mind the sand between your toes. You spend most of the night on the beach, just enjoying each other’s company under the moon. 
You are lucky enough to see a few shooting stars, and you can’t stop yourself from making a wish or two. Wondering if Nick made a wish, you open your mouth to ask him but close it just as quickly. You know his wish already and only you could make it come true.
Coming back to the cottage is bittersweet. The last night of your vacation is spent lying naked with Nick. No sex, just intimate cuddling. You loved how safe you felt in his arms, and you couldn’t deny yourself this feeling.
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January 28th, 2024
You’re nervous all morning and Nick tries his best to keep your mind off leaving the island. But all you want to do is spend all day in bed with him.
Saying goodbye to Dee that day is full of teary-eyed hand-holding, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. You hug her mother and father and thank them for inviting you. 
Nick drives you to the ferry, thinking for all the world that this is the last time he will see you. But like you continue to do, you surprise him when he’s helping you with your bags.
“So, I have some things to clear up in Jersey, but I was thinking Valentine’s Day is just a couple of weeks away. You can come to my place and we can spend some time together. I may not be ready to move 7 hours away just yet. But I know that I am not ready to be without you. I want you to know that I want this, whatever this is,” you admit, gesturing between the two of you.
“I can be amenable to that. On one condition,” he offers, taking your hands in his.
“And what is that one condition, Nicky?” you press, wondering what else he could want or if your terms weren’t enough.
“When we are with each other again, I get to call you my girl. That’s it. Be mine, and all that?” he laughs, watching as the frown lines on your forehead disappear and a smile grows on your face.
“You had me for a second, Nicky. But, why wait? I’m all yours already. Plus, I’ve already planted my flag in your back pocket,” you tease, snaking your hand around to goose him.
“So that would make me your man, then? And you’re my girl. Makes me wanna ask what made you decide to try this with me?” he hesitates, half wanting an answer and the other half just happy that you said yes.
“Hey, like I always say,” you start, wrapping your arms around his neck, “When you know, you know.”
END…?
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A/N: All of the places in this story are real, this is not an advertisement for Ocracoke Island, NC btw. I just loved vacationing here so much, that I wanted to use it in a story lol.
**Tag List** (since I never wrote for Nick, I didn't know who else to tag)
@gummydummy19 @blackwood4stucky
Let me know if you wanna be added (or removed) 😁
My BINGO Card:
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Text
Under Spell, Right From The Start
Synopsis: He insists you're nothing special... but if that's the case, why do you cross his mind so often?
Pairing: Lucifer, Mammon, Satan, Belphegor × MC (separate)
CW: Gender Neutral MC, You/Yours, Fluff, Crushes, Spoilers for lesson 16 (OG) in Belphie's part, A smidge of angst in Belphie and a drop of it in Satan's too bc I couldn't resist
A/N: HEY HI!! So this is my first post, for this fandom specifically, and I'm still trying to grasp my writing style, so I apologise if it's a bit everywhere and not the best. However, if you do enjoy this trainwreck that I call writing, feel free to leave me a request. I'd really love to see some :]]] Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and HAPPY VALENTINES DAY ♡
Lucifer:
How could this be? The Avatar of Pride falling for a mere human? Impossible. He would never.
...Is what he said initially.
Over time, he found himself craving your presence
There was something about you that had him absolutely enthralled
Maybe it was the way you convinced him to take breaks
Or maybe it was the comfortable silence you settled in
You were doing your own things, but... doing them together? Even better.
Perhaps it was the way you learned to manage his brothers
#singlemomgetsabreak
That's a lie. He never gets a break.
#justiceforsinglemom
Now, you could manage his brothers
That doesn't mean you were always going to do it
He insists you're giving him grey hairs
But he enjoys having you around
And he cared for you, more than he wanted to admit to himself.
You're part of the family, after all :)
Mammon:
Pf- please. He's modelled for the biggest brands and has been on the covers of magazines.
He's got a line of demons waiting for him, and you think he'd get hung up on you? Yeah, right.
And he's definitely not trying to grab your attention when you join him for his photoshoots
And he'd never get pouty when you can't hang out with him because you've already made plans
Why should he care?
Oh, but he'd give anything for your attention
MC, he quite literally will run across the Devildom for you if you call
He's your first!
If he isn't by your side, and you aren't by his, then what's he gonna do??
He's greedy. That's what he is.
He's the Avatar of Greed, and you're his most valuable treasure.
Satan:
He has his books, he has his knowledge, and he's very content with it all
The last thing he needs is anyone disturbing that peace for him.
But... you.
He strangely likes his peace even more when you're there?
You could both be doing your own things in mutual silence or you could be talking about a new book the two of you are reading (that is if you like reading)
You make him feel even more at peace than if he was on his own
Then it hits him, he doesn't enjoy your presence, he enjoys you.
He's thinking about you when he's reading a new novel
Imagining you both as the protagonists because he's shaking the thought out of his head
Because you wouldn't want that, would you?
He's taking his time doing more and more little things for you
Annotating books
Letting you borrow books from him
Recommending books to you
It's all worth it to see that smile on your face
He just didn't realise it then
Belphegor:
He hates humans and you're no exception.
He just needs to get out of this stupid attic
Then he'll show them all
He's said it before and will continue to say it: this exchange program is a bad idea
... Because he's met you.
You're ruining this for him, I mean why do you have to be so beautiful?
Why do you have to be so nice?
Why are you so eager to help him?
You don't know how he's...
It. Doesn't. Matter.
You're human.
That's not gonna change.
Even after the murder, he finds his thoughts recircling
You- you're forgiving him? After everything? How??
More importantly, why does his heart swell with hope?
Hope that things can work out between you two
It's a crazy dream of his, that's for sure
Speaking of dreams, you're frequenting them more and more
He thought that it would be the opposite but boy was he wrong
His dreams are simultaneously becoming his worst nightmares because as sweet as they are while he's asleep...
Nothing quite dispels that feeling of disappointment when he wakes up again and you're not there.
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rin-fukuroi · 9 months
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𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧! [𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞]
Please do not translate or publish my works without my permission.
The originals of my works can be read here
Fandom: Honkai: Star Rail
Pairings: Blade x fem!reader
Warnings: nothing, just cute fluff~
▶• ılıılıılıılıılıılı. 音阙诗听, 赵方婧, 昆玉 - 端午节
Note: English is not my native language, so I apologize if there are errors in the text qq
Sometimes it's nice to remember that Blade can be very caring and sweet, even if you don't think of him that way right away. I hope this warm and cozy evening with him will bring you joy and New Year's mood (ノ´ヮ`)ノ*: ・゚
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Tiny splashes settle on the skin of your hand when you lazily tear the peel of a tangerine, filling the room with a characteristic sour smell. So calm and peaceful that you almost fall asleep, sprawled on the table with the soft sound of the TV on, just like your sullen lover with his arms crossed over his chest. Heavy eyelids cover the man's scarlet eyes every now and then, but he continues to sit steadfastly on the chair straight while you carefully peel the tangerine slices from excess white veins before handing one to Blade. He doesn't even bother to pick it up, instead just opening his lips and letting you put the citrus slice on his tongue. You rest your head on your palm, watching the man's eyes close as he pops a juicy piece of tangerine in his mouth, silently enjoying the sweet and sour taste before slowly chewing and swallowing.
You like such quiet and cozy evenings. Blade doesn't come home as often as you would like, so you especially appreciate even the time spent like this, in peace and quiet, satisfied only with his presence next to you. To tell you the truth, you wouldn't mind just taking one of the softest blankets you can find in your house, draping it over your shoulders and taking a little nap, basking in the warmth created by your and Blade's bodies pressed against each other. And it would have been the perfect end to the evening, if not for one "but".
— Blade, — you mumble softly, spreading out even more on your own palm, catching the mumble of a man barely distinguishable from the noise of the TV, it seems, gradually losing the battle with sleep. — Let's take a walk.
— Why?
— Well… the New Year is coming soon after all. Although I like our gatherings at home, but who knows when you'll have to leave again.
Blade mumbles something unintelligible again, reluctantly opening his eyes and fixing his gaze on your sleepy face.
— And where do you want to go?
— I don't even know, — you throw your head back thoughtfully, looking at the ceiling. — We can just go wherever we want!
— That still doesn't answer my question.
A heavy sigh.
— Don't be such a bore! It's just a walk, it doesn't have to have any purpose.
Blade lets out a short sigh, looking at your pouty face as you pop a slice of tangerine into your mouth. Even if he always looks sullen, often stubborn and boring you with his taciturnity or, on the contrary, excessive meticulousness, it's really hard for him to deny you what you want.
— Okay. Just for a little while, I'd still like to take a nap.
You instantly perk up, bursting out of your seat and moving closer to Blade, breaking into a satisfied smile.
— Seriously?!
The man can barely contain either another sigh, or a laugh caused by your funny reaction.
— Seriously.
✧ ✧ ✧
The spicy smell of baking and tea is in the slightly frosty night air, and the lively noise of festive bustle can be heard from the streets. Such a bright contrast compared to that quiet evening, which you both refused, but you are even more inspired by that, running your eyes over each elegant Christmas tree, sparkling lights in the windows and small shops, from where the mouth-watering smells of New Year's treats come.
— Tch, where were you in such a hurry? — Blade grumbles in displeasure, obscuring your delightful view with his tall figure.
You barely had time to open your mouth to scold the man, when suddenly your own soft scarf was pressed to your lips, which Blade carefully wrapped tighter around your neck. You wince and sneeze when the lint tickles your nose, giving your lover a pouty look.
— I wasn't cold.
— Your cheeks are red, — Blade raises an eyebrow, loosely tying the ends of the scarf on your chest before stepping aside again.
— A light frost hasn't harmed anyone yet, — you mumble dissatisfactionedly into your scarf, grabbing Blade's hand again and continuing your leisurely walk.
It didn't take you long to find a new reason to be excited when a shop with caramel apples caught your curious eyes, just as Blade didn't need words to fatally proceed to it, leaving you on a bench nearby. Then hot tea with spices, cute Christmas decorations, near which you hung around for several minutes, desperately fighting a verbal battle with Blade for the fact that you just need them.
Although it might seem that you were being followed by someone who looked more like a gloomy stalker dressed in a black cloak, a scarf covering half of your face, and a hat than your boyfriend, when you rushed forward, finding a new object of genuine interest for yourself, the concern of others receded when Blade over and over again, he caught you by the hand, then pulling you away from another food store, lamenting that later you would complain of abdominal pain, then humbly buying what you liked.
Time flew by so quickly. You haven't felt this childish carelessness for so long that you just gave yourself up to this fleeting feeling, ignoring how tired your legs were, and not paying attention to how there were almost no people around you two. Blade just listened to your endless chatter in silence, allowing himself, even if only for one evening, to relax, succumbing to your infectious carelessness.
— Y/N, it's time for us to get back.
You turn around when you feel Blade stop, still holding your petite hand tightly in his.
— Oh, already? — you sigh in disappointment, burying your nose deeper into your cozy scarf. There's not a soul around you. The noise of conversations and footsteps disappeared without a trace, leaving behind only the distant sounds of stalls closing and lights fading. — Yes, you're right.… Shall we go home then?
You smile softly with a slight note of sadness in your voice, already about to go in the opposite direction, but you feel Blade's hand still holding you in place, forcing you to turn around, puzzled.
— Is something wrong? — you return to your seat across from Blade, looking questioningly into his scarlet eyes peeking out from under a soft black scarf.
The man just continues to stare at you in silence for a while, which should have seemed scary and strange to you if you didn't know Blade, but you just keep looking back at him, slightly narrowing your eyes, until he finally bends over. The fingertips of his free hand lower the scarf from your face, gently cupping your jaw. You barely have time to figure out what's going on, just about to open your mouth to start talking, but the words just stick in your throat when Blade's slightly cool but soft lips are pressed against yours.
Just for a few seconds, but you manage to feel his warm breath on the skin of your face, the light spicy aroma that permeated his clothes and hair, and the sweet taste of caramel. Blade so rarely takes the initiative in physical intimacy that you just freeze, allowing him to leave this short but tremulous kiss on your lips before he silently pulls away, for a moment lingering on your flushed face, either from frost or embarrassment.
— Wh-what are you doing all of a sudden?.. — you blink in confusion, squeezing his big hand tighter.
— I thought I'd better do it myself before you make me.
You follow Blade's gaze as he looks up, noticing a sprig of mistletoe hanging over both of you. Slowly, but still, the realization of what happened comes to you, and you gasp loudly, returning your gaze to Blade, whose face is already buried in a voluminous scarf again.
— Have you been deliberately lulling my vigilance all this time so that I forget that I want to kiss you first?!
You pout, pretending to look offended. It's even good that his face is now covered with a scarf, and you don't see how the corners of Blade's lips lifted in a smile just looking at how your eyebrows are slightly frowning, but your eyes are still sparkling with genuine joy.
— Yes, that's right.
— This is terribly mean! — you keep grumbling even as you both turn around to walk back home as slowly as you came to this cozy place. — Next time I'll take you right under the mistletoe and do it first, you'll see!
Blade nods softly, interlacing his gloved fingers with yours.
— I'll be waiting.
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sparrowsoupp · 3 months
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some of the most iconic queer poster children of the warrior cats fandom. happy pride to the girls gays and theys (particularly those who enjoy brawling feline content)
dabble in my headcannons for these pairings under the read-more button if i’ve piqued your interest…
RAVEN x BARLEY (gay x gay)
i know there’s been a bit of controversy going around about these two and how they could be seen as toxic, with barley being insecure over ravenpaw’s connection to thunderclan. i get that perspective for sure, but i think it’s representative of REASONABLE flaws in a real relationship. obviously it’s not ideal that they never completely resolve it (since it’s ‘solved’ in the graphic novel but reopened in ravenpaw’s novella) and i wished that they addressed that more concretely (i say about a fucking middle grade book about talking cats LOL) but even more so i think you could see it as a realistic relationship as with issues in those, they often subdue and reoccur at intervals. it’s just about talking it out with your partner 🦭👍 plus if the majority of their relationship outside of this is good (which i definitely see it as, since obviously the books have to take place at points of conflict for there to be interesting things to write about) then it seems to be a somewhat small flaw.
that being said i haven’t actually read the books this comes up in so take my opinion with grains of salt, just online discourse about it. totally get if your life experience makes you see their interactions another way as this is just my two cents based on my experience with people.
overall i’m not a superfan of the sickly-sweet reputation these two get but i do like them for what i see them as, which is a Normal Relationship with Some Flaws. i like that they find solace in each other in a peaceful place after fleeing their less peaceful pasts. it’s a great dynamic (and i’m a sucker for farms) and i think they compliment each other’s personalities really well, with barley bringing ravenpaw out of the shell he’s been forced into and ravenpaw inspiring more cautiousness in a very brash barley who would otherwise probably jump into fights at the drop of a hat.
on a somewhat unrelated note, as a kid did anyone else wish that ravenpaw dropped his paw suffix? or blue/firestar granted him an honourary suffix for everything the poor kid went through? this isn’t like a super big meanigful thing but it just annoyed me when i was younger that the paw suffix kind of belittles him to apprentice level when after the fuckery the poor kid went through i think he deserves more recognition from the clans than that.
BLUESTAR x YELLOWFANG (bi x bi)
OKAYYY old women! while fanart of the two of them being in a loving happy relationship is very cute i like to take my old woman yuri one-sided and traumatic.
i think that yellowfang would have an unrequited crush on bluestar. what’s there not to like?! at the point when they meet bluestar is a compassionate but commanding cat in the prime of her leadership. after a bit of her being in the camp i think bluestar would also start spending a curious amount of time in the medicine den… unconciously she definitely saw the appeal in yellowfang from the getgo- it definitely strengthens the reasoning of her surprising decision to defend yellowfang as a member of thunderclan depsite risking a full on war with other clans from it, and her other clanmates lives in the process. obviously bluestar’s a leader that wouldn’t base a decision like that just based on a crush, and it was definitely because of what she wants her clan to stand for, but it’s Not a downside that the cute lady she used to see at gatherings gets to stay a while
bluestar’s definitely not letting it occupy her mind though, of course, totally not (the lady has Trauma from her relationship with oakheart and i see her as having an attatchment issue where she doesn’t feel like she deserves to have a healthy relationship, especially after losing mosskit. she’s just not fully ready yet). yellowfang pines as she watches bluestar throw herself fully into her work to distract herself from the growing feelings, and at some point probably grows annoyed with the cat-and-mouse and starts dedicating herself fully to her own work as a medicine cat too. there are moments of sweetness and clarity and words on the tips of tongues, but just as unexpectedly as they come bluestar will turn her head back to her duties.
unfortunately once tigerstar’s betrayal happens all cute flirting comes to a screeching halt as bluestar is consumed by the paranoia. on the good days she’ll hold stilted conversation with her clanmates, but not so much on the bad days. yellowfang hurts as she watches her crush sprial into madness and dysfunction, the likes of which is only heightened when the fire happens and yellowfang passes- completely insetting bluestar’s hatred for starclan for taking her love (who she still does have deeply-buried feelings for) away from her.
overall, can you tell i love inflicting mental anguish on bluestar? it’s my favourite hobby. i’m not even joking.
LEAFPOOL x MOTHWING (bi x lesbian)
okay this one might make you realise i love doomed yuri. Anyways,
put simply, i think leafpool and mothwing find each other attractive and secretly hook up on a frequent basis for some…. Funny Business. Hanky-Panky, if you will. ‘no-strings-attached’ yeah right i don’t think sapphics have ever pulled off a no strings attatched relationship without casualities.
mothwing definitely wants to confess but leafpool by that point has been forcing herself to move on and ends up telling mothwing about ‘liking’ crowfeather right before mothwing works up the courage (reading leafpool x crowfeather for the first time in the canon books geniunely felt like someone’s ao3 crackship. i guess that’s what traumabinding will do to two mfs). or maybe mothwing notices that leafpool is pregnant (which HOW THE HELL DID NOONE NOTICE IN CANON) and backs the hell off from that. maybe a very angsty argument over that… delicious.
how very ‘good luck babe’ by chappell roan of them! i think things end pretty awkwardly for mothpool and neither leafpool nor crowfeather are really in love with each other they’re just something shiny and distracting from each of their respective circuses of personal lives. i literally hear the clown music playing as they run away together. maybe it’s tinnitus.
they probably pine for each other forever and ever after that, neither falling in love again because they never get over each other. damn. how awkward is it to see your kind-of-ex at the moonpool every month…
anyway thanks for reading though beau’s cat rambles! if youve stuck it out to here… a tip of the hat to you
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fluentmoviequoter · 2 months
Text
Proud to Listen
Requested Here!
Pairing: David 'Deacon' Kay x fem!reader
Summary: You perform in a talent show, and your boyfriend Deacon is proud of you for singing a song that means something to you.
1.1k+ words of pure fluff! He is With Us by Love & The Outcome
Masterlist Directory | Deacon Kay Masterlist | Request Info/Fandom List
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“Hondo, 20-Squad’s needed for assistance on a federal raid out in Covina,” Hicks calls as he exits the situation room. “Grab one of Rocker’s guys to fill the gap.”
“What gap?” Luca asks.
Hondo looks to Deacon, who answers, “I’m leaving early.”
“Why?” Street inquires. He gasps when Chris backhands his arm and brings his opposite hand to cradle where she hit him. “What? It was just a question!”
“I’m going to watch a talent show,” Deacon says.
 “You’re abandoning us with Rocker’s guys to watch a talent show. That’s cold, Deac.”
“Your kids?” Luca guesses.
“Not exactly,” Deacon says carefully.
“Your church?”
“It is there, yeah.”
“They’re gonna keep askin’, Deac,” Hondo points out. “May as well let ‘em start getting the questions over with now.”
Deacon nods before he admits, “My girlfriend is singing.”
Hondo smiles as the rest of the team looks at one another and then at Deacon. They knew he’d been on a few dates with someone, but he hadn’t told them that the relationship was getting serious or that he’d moved on to the next step of 'boyfriend/girlfriend.'
“Can I come?” Street asks.
“No, you’ve got work,” Hondo says.
“Deacon’s going!”
“Because his girl is singing, and he asked off weeks ago.”
“Well, if he hadn’t kept it a secret, I could’ve asked off too.”
“Kid,” Hondo warns.
“Guys, I’ll introduce you soon,” Deacon promises. “But I didn’t think dragging you all to watch her sing in front of a crowd would have been the best first impression. And I didn’t tell you that we were getting serious because we’re just getting there.”
“I’m happy for you, Deacon,” Chris says as she wraps her arm around his shoulders.
“Thanks, Chris.”
“We’re all happy for you, even if one of us has a weird way of showing it,” Luca adds.
“She’s already said she wants to meet you guys, too, just not today. We’ll plan something soon, but you need to focus on prepping for the Covina raid,” Deacon reminds them.
“Yes, sir,” Street replies with a pathetic salute. “Enjoy your ‘noon at the theatre.”
“What is wrong with you?” Chris asks under her breath.
“I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”
“Tell her I want to see the video!” Hondo calls after Deacon.
“Why does he get to see it?!” Street yells.
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“Hi,” Deacon says as he walks to your side. “How are you feeling?”
“Good, a little nervous but mostly excited,” you answer honestly.
“You’re going to be amazing. Hondo asked me to record it for him.”
“Of course, he did.”
“I take it you finally picked a song?” Deacon teases, reminding you of the hassle you went through trying to find the perfect song.
“I did. But you’ll have to find out when I’m on stage.”
“Like everyone else?” Deacon asks.
“I’m really glad you’re here.”
“Me too. I’m going to go get a seat, but you’ve got this, sweetheart.”
“Thanks, Deac. I love you.”
Deacon has heard those three words innumerable times since you first said them several weeks ago, but they still impact him just as deeply as the first.
“I love you,” he replies before kissing your temple. “See you after.”
You squeeze his hand before he steps back and leaves to find his seat. With a deep breath, you steady your shoulders and hum the song again. You picked a song you have been listening to and singing constantly over the last few weeks. Even while browsing other popular songs, you were humming it to yourself. So, you’re confident you made the right choice and are excited to perform it outside your car or shower.
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After a brief intermission, you peek onto the stage and see Deacon sitting in the second row with a clear view of the stage. He supports you in all you do, but having him here for you now brings you the peace that you need to walk onto the stage and smile at the crowd. Deacon’s smile lights up when your eyes meet his, and as the music starts, you nod at him before losing yourself in the lyrics and what they mean to you.
“Remember when your hope is lost, and faith is shaken. Remember when you wonder if you’re gonna make it. There’s a hand stretched out through your deepest doubt. We can’t pretend to see the ending or what’s coming up ahead, To know the story of tomorrow. But we can stay close to the one who knows.”
As the first chorus begins, you find Deacon again, and he is still smiling, but there’s something else in his eyes. You know his faith is important to him, but you’re still surprised that he seems so touched by the song. Or maybe it’s just that you’re the one singing it.
“We can trust our God. He knows what He’s doing though it might hurt now. We won’t be ruined. It might seem there’s an ocean in between, But He’s holding on to you and me, And He’s never gonna leave, no. He is with us…”
The crowd applauds as you finish the song, and you smile as you exit the stage. There are only a few performers after you, and your eyes remain on Deacon until the announcer dismisses the performers to join their friends and families in the audience. You rush toward Deacon, who pulls you into his arms and hugs you tightly.
“You were amazing!” he cheers. “I’m so proud of you!”
“Thank you, Deacon,” you answer as you step back and sit beside him.
“Even if you don’t win, you should know that you affected every person here. You meant what you were singing, and that’s incredible.”
You nod and whisper another thanks to Deacon as the announcer returns to the stage with an envelope containing the winners’ names. Deacon takes your hand between both of his and holds you tightly. Even if you don’t win, Deacon being proud of you is more than enough reward. Besides, you’d like to sing more songs like this one where people can hear them.
Deacon shakes your hands when your name is called, and he helps you stand so you can walk to the stage and receive your certificate. You don’t hear the nice things that the man awarding you says, but you hope the audience listened to your song, not you, but what you were singing.
“These are for you,” Deacon says, extending a bouquet of flowers.
“Deacon,” you whisper as you take the arrangement.
“I’m so proud of you,” he says again. “What do you want to do? Dinner, movie date, anything you want.”
“Why not both?”
Deacon pulls you into his arms as he says, “For you? I’d do it all.”
“Even make plans to introduce me to 20-Squad? Because I love Hondo, but the rest of them are your family too.”
“Of course. They’re going to hear all about this, too.”
You drop your forehead against Deacon’s shoulder, but you love that he’s so proud of you. He’s amazing, and you’re grateful to have him by your side.
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hangmanssunnies · 2 years
Text
Inconceivable!
Summary: No one tells you how hard it is to have to plan to leave and hurt the love of your life. However, when you know you want different things, you must choose. And your baby is probably the only thing you can ever imagine choosing over Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw.
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Pairings: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Fem! Reader
Fandom: Top Gun: Maverick 
Word count: 8.2k words
Warnings: 18+ ONLY, fertility problems, panic attacks, Angst with a happy ending, threatening to break Brad's heart, so many references to The Princess Bride,Soft!smut, Soft!Bradley, Organized!Bradley. Let me know if I missed any others.
Authors Note: No use of Y/N. As always, I love BradBrad so much y'all. I don't know if I can write nonangsty smut. I was thinking of him and kids. The next thing you know I wrote whatever this is. Bradley wearing glasses 🥵. I hope you enjoy this! My inbox is always open if you want to let me know your thoughts. Reblogs with your thoughts, opinions, and tags are always appreciated as well! I love reading through them.
You knew Bradley never wanted to be a father, which was just fine with you because you knew you couldn't have kids. You had known about your fertility problems for a long time and had long ago come to peace with it. 
Y'all had several conversations about children when you first started dating. Once you both felt like your feelings on the matter were hashed out, you had never really felt like revisiting the topic. Your life wasn't less or empty without kids. You were perfectly content with the life you and Rooster had made together. 
That's why you have no idea what to do with the situation you are in right now. You were at your gynecologist for your annual check-up. Taking a pregnancy test was standard procedure, something you didn't even bat your eyes about or worry over. What you weren't prepared for was the positive results back. 
"I'm sorry?" You choked out in disbelief. "That can't be possible."
"I know this is probably surprising, but," your doctor starts to say before you cut them off. 
"No. No, I have known since I was 17 that I can't get pregnant."
"Well, you are and can. Sometimes miracles like this can happen," your doctor responded kindly. 
She went on to ramble more and talk about some next steps and options. You felt shocked, not entirely sure how to process the information she was throwing your way. You left the office a bit later, promising to set up a follow-up appointment. 
Your first thought was to get an abortion. It was the obvious solution. Bradley didn't want kids, and you hadn't wanted them either. Right? You tried to think if it was true. Was it that you didn't want kids or just that you couldn't have kids? 
For the next week, you tried to run the pros and cons and sort out your feelings on what was happening. You tried to act as normal as possible with Bradley. You didn't want to bring anything up until you knew how you felt.
Part of you kept coming back to when you were a little girl to how growing up before you knew that you couldn't have kids, the promise you would whisper to yourself. The promise of how you would do better than your own parents did. 
You thought of the fantasies you used to have: the baby shoes, baking in the kitchen guiding a tiny pair of hands, sports practices, matching sweaters for family holiday cards, first recitals, proms and homecomings, dropping them off for their first day of college, and parent's weekends where you buy cheap booze, family trips, the possibilities of grandkids. 
Now suddenly, all those fantasies were a possibility again. A reality that could come true in less than a year. Thinking about them brought an ache to your chest. An ache that manifested as want, a desire so strong all the cons you could come up with didn't really matter, well, all of them but one. 
The biggest problem of the puzzle was Bradley, the love of your life. You had absolutely no doubt that he would do the right thing and stay by your side. However, you didn't want him to be a dad because he had to do it. The thought of him being forced to do something he didn't want to, just because it's the right thing, made your stomach roll. The idea of part of him resenting you, and eventually your child too, because of something you chose. That was something you couldn't live with. 
So even though you felt a heavy hurt in your chest, you knew you had to leave Bradley. You weighed that heartbreak compared to the want for this child that had bloomed in your chest, and one outweighed the other. So now, on top of thinking about the baby, you started to think through quiet plans of how it would hurt your husband least to leave him. 
You almost broke down one night and told him the two of you had been lying on the couch together. Bradley was casually spooning you from behind, one of his hands playing with a lock of hair while the movie he picked played on the TV. Of course, it was the Princess Bride, one of his all-time favorites. 
You were half watching the movie, half dozing. Bradley was too good at soothing you, and you had started noticing a significant change in your energy levels as of late. You mentally made a note to bring it up at the follow-up doctor's appointment you had scheduled. 
"I would do that," Bradley suddenly says, bringing you back to alertness. 
"Oh really?" you hum, unsure what he was talking about. 
"Yes, I would wait five years and chase after kidnappers, fight the prince, build a tolerance to poison, all for you, baby." 
Bradley's honest love for you warmed your chest like it always did. However, the current circumstances turned that warmth into a bitter aftertaste in the back of your throat. What you were doing haunted you. His hand drops your hair and traces down your arm until he threads your fingers together. His large hand in yours helped further break down your resolve. 
"What if I asked you to do something you didn't want to?" You ask him hesitantly. 
"If you wanted me to, then I would," Brad tells you plainly. As if that were a given, you should just expect that his desires would line up with yours. It doesn't put you at ease like you were hoping it would. 
"What if it was something you really didn't want to. Something bigger than sword fights and rodents of unusual size?" 
His hand flexes squeezing yours a little tighter. Bradley doesn't say anything for a moment, and you wait with bated breath. Finally, he nuzzles your neck with his nose before asking, "Do you have something specific in mind?" 
That was the moment, the moment that you could come clean to him. You could be honest and lay it all out on the table, but you don't. You can't. You aren't ready to let him go yet; it's too soon, you tell yourself. 
So you lie to him, finally pushing the words out your throat, "No, nothing specific. Just asking." 
Bradley's fingers that are laced with yours squeeze yours again, and you have the sneaking suspicion that he doesn't believe your lie. "Well, even if it was big. We would do what we always do. We'll talk about it and figure it out. Then I'll agree with what you want, just like I always do."
"You shouldn't do things you don't want to do just for me, Brad," you chastise him lightly. The heavy pit in your chest constricts even more. 
He kisses your head, pulling you a little tighter against him in his embrace. "Sure, whatever you say, babe." 
The whole thing sits with you for another week, and the doctor's appointment you made starts to creep closer. You are reading an article in incognito mode on your phone about nutrition during pregnancy and the importance of vitamins. Occasionally, you glance up to see Bradley sitting on the other side of the couch. 
He has a thick World War Two biography book wide open, nearing the end. His reading glasses are perched on the edge of his nose. Even though you had teased Brad relentlessly when he first got them, the glasses were actually really hot. The sight of them on him now makes heat start to bud in the bottom of your abdomen. 
You lock your phone and set it aside, looking more thoroughly at Bradley now. He was so so very handsome. You found it unlikely there would ever be another man you would allow into your bed after him. The edges of panic that seep into you every time you consider the inevitable end with Bradley makes a reappearance. You push it to the side as much as possible, but it creates a sudden desperation for him in you. 
"Bradley."
"Yes, my love?" He asks, not looking up from the page in front of him. 
"I need something."
"What do you need?" He turns the page of his book and pushes those damn glasses higher up the bridge of his nose. 
"I need you," you tell him, biting your lip. 
His eyes snap up from the page to look at you, and his eyebrows raise, processing your words. "What was that?"
"I need you to make love to me, Brad. I'm on fire." 
He dog ears the page he is on his book and sets it on the coffee table, turning to give you his full attention. His hands casually trace up your leg, massaging the tense muscles of your claves. 
You let out a soft sigh at the feeling. A few moments later, Bradley crawls up your body, pressing soft kisses to your neck and then melding his lips to yours. You sigh into his mouth, enjoying the taste of him, trying to savor it. You pull off his reading glasses so they aren't in the way, haphazardly tossing them away. 
When he starts to pull away, you wrap your arms around him, drawing him closer, not wanting any space between you. You trace one of your hands down his neck and under the collar of his shirt, tracing his shoulders, kissing him harder, slipping your tongue into his mouth. 
"What has got you so needy, sweet girl?" He asks you, confused, pressing a few soft sweet kisses to your throat.
"Just you, handsome man," you tell him, trying to draw Bradley back to your lips. Bradley smiles, hearing your words but then shifts off you and the couch. 
Before you can protest at his absence, he goes to pick you up. Like every time Bradley picks you up, you are hit with the worry that it will be the time he can't do it, or he will drop you, make heaving grunting sounds, or some other terrible mishap will come to pass. It doesn't, though; he secures you in his arms and starts to carry you through the house to your room. 
You start pressing kisses to the readily presented column of his neck then. When he reaches your bed and goes to put you down, you sink your teeth into the space where his neck starts to curve into his shoulder. Although he lets out a hiss, you hadn't held back with the bite. You made it intending to mark him. 
When he does set you down, you scramble hurriedly to start undressing him, desperate to see and feel the expanses of his golden skin. Unfortunately, you only get Brad out of his teeshirt before he stops you. His large hands close around your wrists, holding them tight, preventing them from moving further down, lower than the top of his abdomen. 
"Slow down, pretty girl. We got all the time in the world," he says. You know, he said it to be soothing, but he didn't know how wrong he was. He didn't understand the finite amount of time you had left together. 
So when he lets go of your wrist, you instead start to pull off your own clothes and settle yourself on the bed. You stare at him expectantly and let out the smallest huff. 
"Slow down." He tells you again, "And, don't move your hands off the headboard," When he is satisfied with how you are holding it, he starts to kiss down your body. 
"Why are you so worried?" he breaths out against your inner thigh, pressing feather-light kisses to the skin there. "You know I'm going to take care of you, my love. I always do. There's no reason to be so worried."
Bradley's words manage to hit the exact spot of comfort you are actually needing. Even though you are planning on leaving him. You still want him to take care of you; you want to do this with him. But, you also know that can't happen. So, regardless you feel more at ease; the desperation in you is not quite so hot, not making you jittery with need. 
Bradley rewards the way your body relaxes by licking stripe over you. You resist the urge to let go of the headboard and bury your hands in Bradley's thick hair. The way he sucks your clit into his mouth to roll his tongue over makes you arch, needing more. Bradley lays his arm across your hips, applying pressure to keep you still under him. 
The more you work to struggle against his arm, feeling your high edge closer and closer, a thought suddenly pops into your head. Is it still okay for Bradley to hold you down like this? Are you going to hurt your baby? It's an irrational thought, you know that, but your body instantly reacts to it. Of course, so early into your pregnancy, there is no reason this would be a problem, but you still drop your hips down onto the bed, no longer trying to move them against him. Your distraction pulled you far back from the edge. 
You try to focus on the feel of Bradley's tongue and how warm he feels with his shoulders caged between your thighs. But only a few breaths later, Bradley is lifting his head to look at you. 
He has a crease between his eyebrows, and his tongue that was just around you darts out to lick to own lips. "What just stopped you from coming?" he asks, concerned. His voice is thick and low. His hold over your waist disappears as he draws soothing circles on your hip. Bradley's concern draws you back to him and into the want you have for him. 
You let go of the headboard and stretch out your arms. Then, burying your hands in his hair, you tilt Brad's face to fully meet your eyes. 
"Make love to me, Bradley," you beg him. He stares at you for a very long minute, and you stare back at him, waiting. Finally, he pulls his eyes away from yours and stares at your center in front of him. 
"As you wish," he mutters the words. Rooster pulls himself off the bed and pulls his sweats off. You drag your eyes over his naked body, taking him all in. You lick your lips at the sight. 
"You are breathtaking, Brad," you tell him. That smile that melts your heart shows up on his face, and he glows under your praise.  
You crawl to the edge of the bed and trace your hands up his muscular thighs. You guide your hand upwards. You brush over his cock, not really giving it any attention, before outlining his side, watching his stomach and abs contract under your fingers. You go slowly, trying to memorize the feel of his skin under you. You kiss along his chest too. 
He leans down and captures your lips. You kiss Rooster back, glad that the fervor has left your body, but you are no less desperate for him. The desire to memorize him doesn't go. 
You urge him onto the bed, pushing him on his back. You straddle Bradley, settling over him, with his cock nestled in between your lower lips. You give a small rock, his head bumping into your clit. You moan a little and repeat the motion. 
Leaning forward, you rest your hands on his chest to give you more leverage. Rooster moves his hips with you increasing the friction. The pace is slow and almost teasing for both of you. 
Shifting your weight, you lean and kiss him again. Bradley's tongue slips into your mouth, running against yours. One of his hands comes up and rests on your hip, urging you, pulling you further down to rub against him harder. His other hand cups one of your breasts, his thumb running over your nipple in swirling strokes. 
You break his embrace just to reach your hand and guide him inside. Bradley lets out a heavy sigh as he slips into you. You resist the urge to slide all the way down his length, keeping it slow. 
"Fuck, you feel so good," he tells you, biting his lips. 
"Love how you fill me, Brad," you sigh once he is fully hilted. Both of you are breathing more elevated. When you start to move your hips again, Bradley closes his eyes and presses his head back into the bed. 
You immediately stop moving, glaring down at him. "No," you say, and his eyes open instantly, looking at you again. You reach up a hand to grip his chin affectionately, holding his face in place. "I need to see you." 
"You are so beautiful," he tells you. Bradley does as you want and doesn't break eye contact again. 
The room is filled with both of your moanings as you work together at a slow, steady pace. The way his hands run along your skin and back is almost reverent. The heat in you starts to build again. You grind down hard onto Bradley so that your clit gets more stimulation. 
Rooster's right hand comes around and settles on your lower stomach, applying pressure and letting his thumb dip down to brush your clit in light strokes. You gasp, a moan breaking from your throat. You freeze on top of Bradley's cock, enjoying the zing his thumb just sent up your spine. 
"That's right. So good." Bradley moans out, pressing his thumb harder into you. Even though he is filling you so deliciously, you don't feel close enough to him. You feel like you want to crawl into his skin. That would be the only thing that would satisfy your need for him. 
You grab his hand that isn't on your clit and thread your fingers together. His hand grips yours back. Bradley doesn't make any movement to shift either of your hips, content to play with your clit and stare into your eyes. 
"Fuck, I love you." Bradley groans out, biting his lower lip. You start to rock your hips into his again, but for the most part, keeping him fully hilted inside you. You almost feel like you are drowning in his eyes with how he looks up at you. His heavy-lidded gaze makes you clench around him.
Your moans and quiet pants mix with his. The tension in you grows as you swirl your hips into his. 
"Need this, need you." Bradley swirls his thumb a little harder and does break eye contact to nip your neck, sitting more up on the bed to get a better angle. Having more of your skin pressed together helps ease more of the ache in you. 
You grip his hair again, pulling him up, shifting, so you are chest to chest. Bradley's free hand clutches you close to him. You trace the scars on his cheek with your lips before kissing him again. 
"I love you," you sigh against his mouth. He groans and rocks his hips into yours, creating a bit more friction. Rooster understands just what you need, not pulling out of you. 
The two of you build a rhythm together; finally, you can't hold back anymore. The bubble in you bursts, and you clench hard around Bradey's cock. Bradley takes a few more gasping breaths and then cums in you with a low moan. Bradley starts to move like he is going to pull out of you, so you whine and hold him closer.  
"No, no. I need you closer," you tell him. You are still desperate to have him near. You press your nose into Rooster's neck, breathing in his natural musky scent. Trying to absorb the smell entirely, memorizing it before biting the skin and tasting it. 
"Woah. Woah," Bradley says breathily. You let out a low hum in response, trying to savor his sounds as well. You wiggle your hips against him again, where he is still half hard. You consciously clench around his dick, reminding yourself how full Bradley makes you. 
"Baby, stop," he says. Rooster's voice is wrecked, and his large hands hold your hips still. At first, you don't even hear his request until he repeats it more forcefully. Then he rolls you over onto your back and pulls out of you quickly. You gasp at the sudden loss of him. You have to lay there for a moment, trying to reorient yourself. Bradley is sitting on the edge of the bed, panting hard, his hands on his knees.
"Bradley?" You croak out, reaching a hand hesitantly towards him. He looks back at you, and his face is a mix of panicked and furious.
"What the fuck was that?" He asks you in a low growl.
"What was what?"
"Don't bullshit me."
"I have no idea what you are talking about," you tell him, drawing your eyebrows close together.
"That was was goodbye sex," he says slowly. Your mouth drops open, and you try to reach around your rattling brain to come up with an answer, an excuse. However, you find it completely empty. 
"That was the exact kind of sex we have before I leave and deploy. You had the same look." Bradley was almost shaking, and you had no idea what to say that wouldn't be a lie. 
"What's going on? Something has been wrong for weeks. I keep waiting for you to talk to me, and you fucking haven't." 
"I —" you start to say, but Bradley's eyes are so captivating, so genuine, you can't lie to him. So before you even know what you are saying, the words fall out of your mouth, "I'm leaving."
Rooster physically recoils at your words. The line of his back is taut, and his eyebrows draw together. His mouth presses into a tight line. His jaw flexing, and you can tell he is clenching his teeth. "What did I do wrong?"
"No, sweetie," you say quickly. "It's not you. It's me." You tell him gently. It was you, well, you and this baby, but Brad didn't need to know that. Your words only seemed to make him more upset. 
"Are you kidding me? You didn't just say that." He mutters it under his breath, pulling at his short curls in frustration and glaring at you. He is so tense the veins in his bicep and neck start to pop. 
"I'm sorry," you offer him quietly. 
"I don't want to hear sorry. I want to hear a reason. Were you going to tell me? Or just planning to disappear?"
"Of course, I was going to tell you."
"When?" 
"Soon."
"Why? "
"I can't..."
"No. I think I deserve to know why the love of my life is leaving me," Bradley says, frustrated. He stands up from bed, goes to his drawers, and pulls on some boxers to throw on. He also grabs one of his old Sigma Pi shirts out of his drawer and throws it for you to shrug on. 
You felt shame and frustration building in you. You didn't want to deal with this situation right now. You didn't want to have to tell Bradley why. Then to your absolute horror, and probably the hormones coursing through you, you burst into tears. 
Bradley's pacing halts for a moment at the sight of your tears, but then he resumes momentarily as he balls his fist tight. His knuckles turning a paler shade. 
"We want different things." You gasp out between the sobs racking your body. 
"We want different things," he repeats slowly, like he is trying to piece out some hidden meaning in the words.
"Yes," you hiccup nodding your head. 
"How could that be possible?" He questions you sharply. "If that were the case, we wouldn't have gotten married. And you didn't mention anything when we had our last relationship check-in."
Bradley was big on communication. He insisted y'all have seasonal relationship check-ins with each other to talk about anything that had happened and how you were feeling about your relationship. This conversation should have probably been reserved for the next one, but you couldn't wait a few more weeks before leaving, or Bradley would know.
You were going to start showing at some point; while all the articles you read were inconsistent about when that might happen, it would happen eventually. You knew it would probably be impossible to leave Rooster if he knew that you were pregnant. Every moment with him weakened your resolve to do the right thing. 
"Things change, people change." You weakly tell him. Not able to conceive a better excuse. 
"I don't understand why you are jumping into leaving me. Baby, why won't you talk to me?" Bradley suddenly dropped hard to his knees on the wood floor at the side of the bed. You winced at the sound it made. He pulls one of your hands into both of his. "Please talk to me," he begs you, holding your hand delicately in his. The puppy dog look Bradley has mastered coming out in full force. 
"I can't…"
"You can," he reassures you, swiping a thumb across your pulse point. You felt your stomach roll, the emotions in you going haywire. 
"I'm…" you trail off and then shake your head at him in denial of this situation. As soon as you tell Bradley, it will be over. 
"It's okay, baby. Anything. You can tell me anything. Talk to me. I won't be mad," he adds on for your benefit. Your plans all crumbled at that moment because how can you deny Bradley Bradshaw anything when he begs for it. 
"I'm pregnant," you finally whisper in a barely audible voice. With how Bradley reacted to your words, you might as well have screamed them. First, he flinches like a whole body flinch. Every muscle you can see tensing. He shutters and his grip on your hand tightens to where it is almost painful.  
Bradley freezes like that for a moment, blinking at you owlishly, before he drops his head down, hiding his face from your view. Finally, he presses his face down into the bed. 
You wait with bated breath. Rooster's grip on your hand didn't lessen in the slightest. You feel panic settle in the back of your throat when his shoulders start to tremble, and he still hasn't said anything.
"Bradley?" You flex your hand, resisting his tight grip, and he releases you. His hands fall limply on the bed. He still hasn't looked at you, though. 
Tears start to streak down your face faster, and a small sob hitches in your throat. "I am sorry," you tell him sincerely. 
"Are you really?" His low voice asks muffled. 
"Sorry, or pregnant?" You ask pulling up the collar of his shirt you are wearing to wipe away some of your tears. "Because it's both." 
His hands come to clasp themselves together, and you briefly wonder if he is praying. The shaking of his shoulders and the inability to see his face make it increasingly impossible to understand his reaction.
Finally, he looks at you, and those hazel eyes bleed back at you, tears still falling down his face staining his cheeks a bright red even through the healthy tan he has right now. Bradley's eyes trace over your face looking like he is searching for any trace of a lie. Then he examines your body under his shirt like he might already see a difference. 
As if there was a difference, he would be able to notice now that he didn't notice before when you were naked, and he was inside of you. You wrap your arms around your chest, hugging yourself under his scrutiny. 
"I'm going to keep it." You finally tell him now that Bradley's shining eyes are available for scrutiny again. His tongue darts out to wet his lips, and his face falls into a frown. "I'm sorry," you say again. 
You try to think of the right words to explain yourself to him. "When I found out, I realized I wanted this. I know we always said we didn't. But I really want this baby, Bradley. I am sorry I kept it from you. I just didn't know how to tell you. And then I saw these baby shoes in the store. They were so cute." Your fingers knot into the edge of the worn frat shirt you are wearing. His hazel eyes aren't giving you much to go off of. They are still darting around your face like he is trying to figure out what you are telling him. 
Brad abruptly stands up in the middle of your rambling. So, you halt your words. Watching him as he walks out of the room. You strain your ears, trying to listen to where he went. You hear the hallway door open and beeps coming from the safe. After hearing it click open and seal again, Bradley's feet can be heard on the hallway floor again. 
Your mind runs, trying to think of what he could have grabbed from the safe. Your important documents? You silently make a note that was something that you need to be sure to pack. You wouldn't want to come back to Bradley to get your passport or something after leaving. Could it be money? Was he going to give you money to leave with and give you some of the cash you two had been saving to move? 
The thoughts make breathing extra hard, and you start to suck air in and out rapidly. The panic floods your veins, making the walls of the room shrink inward towards you. Sharp tingles prick at your fingertips and toes. 
Before you can run through any other possible scenario, he gets back. 
You can't focus on Bradley enough to see him through the black that starts to edge in at the corner of your vision. You desperately try to pull a gasping breath in your chest. The action of breathing is suddenly too overwhelming. 
The panic of what you had just done finally cutting into you. That Bradley now knew the secrets you had been harboring so close to your chest. There is wringing in your ears, the shuddering wracking your body. You curl into yourself to try and shield yourself from the hurt and panic ringing through your body. 
Then, you are engulfed. There isn't enough weight on the outside of you to combat the storm of panic that was trying to burst out from the inside of your veins. Numbness fills your body, and you know you are close to passing out. The storm brewed inside you, desperate to escape your body, desperate to take you out at the same time. 
Heaving in breaths gets harder and more difficult. You dig your nails hard into the skin of your thighs, trying to scramble for anything to steady yourself. Fighting each desperate moment when there is s shift.
At first, you don't know what has changed. However, your breaths get a gasp longer, allowing slightly more oxygen, and the black in your vision starts to recede. You slam your eyes shut at the nausea you feel. The more air you can finally take in, the more you are allowed to start making sense of anything besides your own haywire body. 
You are wrapped in your weighted blanket, and the extra pressure is aided by Bradley. He is holding you tight within his arms and legs, and he has you pulled close to his chest.
His legs are wrapped around your hips and crossed in front of you. Giving the front of your body room. Your legs are trapped between you two. One of his arms is crossed over your chest, and the other is petting your head soothingly, playing with your hair occasionally. 
Bradley is humming to you. You try and focus on the tune. It's like a lifeline; you cling to the sound, letting it help your thoughts trail away from your panic. You keep trying to breathe bigger, longer breaths consciously now. 
It's a tune you have heard before. Finally, Bradley breaks from the humming, whispering one of the lyrics into your ear, and you can immediately place the song. 
"Love of my life," he mutters lowly into your ear, and then he returns to his humming. You are flashed back to a different time he sang this song to you. 
He had been perched on the bench of a piano. Fingers gliding over the keys in time, his sweet voice dipping between octaves. It was Love Of My Life, by Queen. It is the song Bradley sings to you before every single deployment. 
The song feels like a confirmation that you two will not be making it. A confirmation he is letting you go. This is the song that always fills the space between you when parting ways. The small semblance of recovery you had made is gone. Your breaths start to quicken again as you are dragged back into the panic. 
Bradley's arms flex hard, and there is slightly more pressure around you. The beads of the weighted blanket shifting under his hands. He continues humming the song, but this time he peppers in a few more of the lyrics. 
"Love of my life, don't leave me," he croons softly into your ear. 
You don't know how long Bradley holds you waiting for you to calm down. You don't ever feel at ease, but the slow breaths and Bradley's soothing voice help bring you down from the high and worst of the panic attack.  
You manage to let out a little whimper, and Bradley's arms start to loosen around you in slow intervals. You turn your face to the side, slotting your eyes up to catch a glimpse of him. Bradley has his eyes closed, and his face is splotchy and red from crying still. You fill in some of the lyrics to his humming in a cracked, barely there voice. Those beautiful eyes flash open, hearing your voice join his humming. 
He won't stop humming, though. Rooster's hazel eyes are so intense, a medusas snare, that even as hard as you try to close your eyes, you aren't successful. They have captivated you entirely. Bradley finishes humming the song and lets his arms slip from around you. His legs uncross, and they fall flat on the bed on either side of you. 
You push the weighted blanket off your top, so it is pilled around your legs as you ease out of your curled position. 
"BradBrad," you whisper for him. You are still trembling at the very tips of your fingers. The buzz and tingles at the front of your nose are still persistent, but feeling has returned to the rest of your body. The needles fade out of your hands and legs. 
"Love of my life," he hums sweetly again. His eyes have a tiny bit of worry, but for the most part, they are full of love and adoration for you. His body is borderline hot to the touch and feverish behind you. His heart is thumping loudly under your ear. 
Brad's now loose hands find new purchase, gliding over your hips, tracing slow, steady circles. Then his left hand starts creeping forward further. Bradley's large hand is suddenly under his shirt and splaying out flat against your lower belly. That is where it finds its perch. 
You gasp at the feeling of his hand, at the placement of it. Brad's fingers make the tiniest indents pressing into your skin. Your breath hitches at his squeeze. The metal of his wedding ring is warm against your skin, a nice contrast to the rest of his hand. 
Hearing the way your breath hitches, Bradley immediately lays his hand fully flat. Bradley now retreating to a feather-light touch. His fingers swirl in an unknown pattern on your skin. His hands like to trace the shapes of flight paths he has memorized. 
It was something Bradley had confessed to you one night during pillow talk. The two of you sprawled together. You were laying half on his chest. His fingertips were tracing the length of your spine, in feather-light trials, moving from the base of your spine to the small of your back, then following the path again. His fingers would sometimes brush into your hair and give small scratches before tracing your flesh again. 
"How do you do that?" You finally had asked him.
"Do what?" He responded, but something about the glint in his eye told you he knew exactly what you were referring to. Rooster just wanted you to admit it out loud. 
"You are so consistent, but you keep me on my toes." Bradley's hand stills where it had been gliding on your back. Then he started to trace once more, but this time his fingers making small movements and taking on a new drag like pattern dancing across your back. 
"Is that right?" He asked you, but there was a full-blown boyish smirk donning his face. 
You nodded your head, licking your lips. The tingles that his hands were sending through your body started to warm you up even after just having finished with him. "Yes, it rocks my world. So, why don't you let me on the secret?"
"I'm just that good, baby," he told you cheekily. 
"Bradley Bradshaw." You warned lowly.  
"It's flight paths." 
"What?"
"I use the flight paths I have memorized," his fingers danced in a looping motion doubling back and then tracing forward again.
"They make it easy to loop, but it's long enough that there is different pacing, or I use the piano," He told you, letting his fingers tap and shift along your back as if it was a set of ivories suddenly. It had made you giggle. 
"That might have been one of the sexiest things you have ever told me, Bradley." You had told him before you kissed him silly. And letting him showcase those skills with his tongue for the second time that night. 
Now, Brad's hand that is lying against your stomach also starts to follow a pattern. You open your mouth, but Bradley quickly cuts you off. 
"Please, don't say sorry."
"But I am."
"That was a bad attack."
It was true that you hadn't had one that severe in a while. "I'm—"
"Do not say sorry," he repeats. You sigh heavily and move to stop leaning against Bradley. However, he doesn't let you. The hand on your hip and lower abdomen fighting you and drawing you flush against him. He settles you, so you are comfortably leaning against his chest again.
"I am sorry," Brad finally says, almost a whisper in your ear. 
"You are sorry?"
"Yes."
"Why?" You question him. Not sure you understand what he is apologizing for.
"Why are you going to leave me?" Brad asks instead of answering your question. 
You sigh and close your eyes. You lean your head back, so it's settled on Bradley's shoulder. Then take a deep calming breath before responding. "I know you don't want kids. You have always been very honest about that, and it's not your fault I'm pregnant. 
"Well, I don't think you went and got pregnant by yourself. It's kind of a process that takes two contributing parties. Unless you are going to tell me that it's someone else's." Bradley says the words so incredulously that you know he has no doubt the baby is his. 
"I know you don't want this, but I realized I do."
"What if I do want this?"
"I'm not going to let you do this just because you feel obligated, Bradley," you tell him tiredly.
"No. I want this."
"How could that be?" You ask. 
You feel him shift behind you, and you open your eyes to see what he is doing. Bradley is reaching to the bedside table where you see a huge binder sitting. 
It is a binder that you know well. Bradley is a meticulous and organized person. He likes to refer to this binder as your Life Plan Binder. It was full of timelines, dates, references, and lists. Everything Bradley feels is necessary for y'all's life. 
You realize that this one is different from the one that lives on his desk. It is slimmer, and the front doesn't have a picture of the two of you slotted in the cover that the other did. 
"The LPB?" You ask him, confused.  
His left hand makes itself at home again on your lower abdomen, while his right hand puts the binder on your lap. Finally, you read the cover where it says alternative plans in bold lettering. 
"I'm sorry I left earlier, but I needed to get this." He mutters into your ear. Brad's tone is deeply apologetic. He flips the binder open, and there are labeled tabs. You fully realize this is a binder you have never seen before. You scan the tabs and freeze up in Bradley's hold when you see the one he is thumbing to.
It is towards the back, behind the different tabs, including restations, health, new cars, vacations, and retirement, is a tab that has a simple label. It's blue and just says, baby. Bradley flips to the tab, and you see the cover page of the section with the table of contents. In bold at the top of the page, you read Baby Bradshaw. 
A sob that ends up coming out as a broken laugh ripping from your chest. The section contents was filled out with thoroughly thought out plans on you having children, from a section with important timelines, appointments to schedule, college savings plans, and a section with boys' and girls' names that he likes. 
You bring one of your hands up to stifle the sobs that are bubbling in your chest. You hold your hand close over your mouth to try to hold back the sound. His fingers traced over the page and the table of contents for the section. 
"What is this?" You finally ask him. 
"It's my alternate life plan binder. For you know, if other things come up."
"Why do you have a Baby Bradshaw section?" You hesitantly ask. His hand is still warm against your stomach, and he flexes his fingers. 
"Well, a while ago, I started thinking about kids," he trails off, and you start looking through the table of contents again. You see that the most robust and largest section is actually related to adoption. You feel your heart melt in your chest. A new bright feeling of hope blossoms looking at the care, time, and thought he has put into this. As he continues, "and well… You know how I am. I wanted to be prepared for that possibility."
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"I've been ruminating, and I don't know. Maybe I would have mentioned it at our next check-in. But I knew you don't…" Bradley doesn't finish his sentence, and you lose your mind a little bit.
You pull the large binger up into your hands and shift. You struggle and move until you turn in his grip. Your legs wrapped around Brad's waist. You want to see his face, which is easier in this position. The hand that had been placed on your stomach curls around your back and waist, steadying you against him. 
"You changed your mind?" You ask him. You let your hands trace over his chest, settling on cupping his face. Then, staring into his eyes, you look for any trace of anger or deceit. 
"You seem to also have changed your mind, baby," he takes the binder from where it was awkwardly pressed in between you two. It allows you to settle closer to him. Bradley sets the binder to the side, momentarily breaking eye contact to make sure none of the pages are creased. Your chests were almost flush together. You wrap your arms around his neck, and then he is the one to hold your face. His eyes reconnect with yours, and you once again feel like you are caught in them. 
The intensity and openness in his gaze make your lips move faster than your brain to lay out the whole truth for him. "I don't think that I ever wanted to not have kids. I had just accepted it because I knew that I couldn't." You explain, not breaking eye contact. Bradley's thumb traces a slow circle against your cheek. 
"I would never let you do this by yourself."
"I can't just throw a wrench like this in your life, Brad." 
He immediately starts shaking his head in protest. "It's our life. I'm not going to lie to you and say that you didn't hurt my feelings. If you left me," Bradly heaves a heavy shaky breath. You briefly wonder if he is going to cry again. Then he continues to explain, "I would be broken… shattered. I feel even worse that you didn't want to talk to me or tell me."
You can tell how deeply you hurt him. Even though you knew what you were going to do was wrong, now that you and Bradley are talking about it. You know you need to try and explain your rationale no matter how messed up it was. 
"At first, I wasn't sure how I felt. I wanted to talk to you, but I couldn't do that before I knew how I felt. But then I kept thinking about all the times we talked about you not wanting kids. How you had so many good, valid reasons for feeling that way. I know you, Bradley. I knew that you would do the right thing as soon as I told you. But you don't need obligation ruling anymore of your life that it already does."  
"So what if I was obligated? I agreed to be obligated to you for the rest of our lives when we got married. I want to be bound to you. I want to shoulder your burdens, just like you shoulder mine," Bradley says.
"A child is a lifelong burden for you to shoulder," you say. You need to know, need to be fully sure Brad understands. 
"Do you think so low of me? Do you think I wouldn't love something that was a mix of you and me?"
"There are plenty of people in the world who don't love their children." You tell him, swallowing hard. 
He lets out a long sigh, his breath fanning a bit over your face. "I want this baby. I want this baby with you. I want to be at every doctor's appointment. I want to know everything I've missed. I want family vacations where I can buy a Hawaiian shirt in three different sizes for all of us. I want little league games. I want a baby to sing to sleep. I want someone to put on top of the piano and sing to like my dad did. I want us to paint a nursery. I want Disney trips. I want to fight about curfew. I want to make breakfast on Saturdays and spend Sundays in the shop with football, restoring a beat-up first car. I want to make dad jokes. Fuck, I need to buy a pair of new balances."
Warmth fills you at his words. You let out a small laugh picturing Bradley as a stereotypical dad. How he wants all of that with you. That you won't do this alone like you have mentally been preparing yourself for since finding out. You run your fingers up and down his neck trailing it down his shoulder as far as you can reach before tracing back to his neck. A content sigh falls from his lips, and his eyes close, enjoying your gentle caresses.
"What are some of the names?" You break the silence after his confessions.  
"I like Westley," he says with a small boyish smile. You bite back a grin at the name, playfully rolling your eyes. 
"Oh, and is Buttercup on your list for girl names?" You ask him teasingly. 
"Maybe," he says. You lean forward and peck his lips. 
"You're not going to leave me," Bradley whispers with conviction. You know he is still coming down from the emotional roller coaster you just went through together. You also know Brad is going to need time to fully process this conversation and the change about to happen in your lives. However, you also know, without a doubt, that Bradley will be holding your hand at your next doctor's appointment. 
"No, I'm not." You confirm and brush your lips over his softly. 
"Stay with me forever," Bradley begs you in a voice a little too small for you to handle. 
You hold the hazel gaze for a very, very long moment. You let him examine you, see the truth, and honestly bleeding in your gaze before you respond. What you want to say at first is: I love you. However, those words weren't quite right; they didn't seem to fully capture your intention and the emotion in your chest you felt for this man. So instead, you settle on the words you think will most closely allow him to understand. You brush your lips against him again, whispering your answer into them. 
 "As you wish, Bradley."
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