#don't take this post too seriously lmao

[darkmagicmirror]

This is not a response to any specific post because I've seen so many of them (and I don't remember any specific post(s), I just know I've seen this take), but like I don't really understand why there are people who think Claudia healing Soren was some kind of selfish act done because she wanted it and didn't care about what Soren wanted or whatever. Soren, throughout the entire show up to that point, prides himself on his physical capabilities. He's always on the move, he's the captain of the Crownguard (also something he's proud of), etc. Also I don't think there's anything Soren says to indicate he genuinely is okay with being unable to move.

Like there are plenty of things to maybe analyze/criticize about Claudia there, but it's really hard to get where "Claudia is just being selfish" from, in that specific situation.

I mean the only point I can maybe see toward it is that she doesn't ask Soren directly what he wants. But idk it feels kind of weird to see someone injured and be like "Hey are you okay with this?" while they're clearly upset about it. Plus Soren has been in her life since the beginning, so there's some extra understanding there that would be different than if it were anyone else. (I do think she should have given him some sort of heads up before actually doing the spell, but I don't think that equates to not caring about what he wants.)

Like idk I'm always open to hearing other opinions (if calmly/respectfully discussed), but I find it really confusing.

[pinkyjulien]

Y'KNOW WHAT I'm surprised nobody had a ship with Henry just yet

He's a mess, proper freak who'd be down for all kind of extreme stuff

He's an old man AAAND a Rockerboy, he just seems to hit a lot of fan's favorites here- and he ain't bad lookin either

C'mon I mean??? Ayo

[thevalleyisjolly]

Critical Role PCs (main cast) ranked by whether or not Chetney could be their biological dad

Disqualified (dad known/knew their dad):

Ashton, Beau, Caduceus, Caleb, Fearne, Grog, Imogen, Jester, Keyleth, Laudna, Percy, Taryon, Vax, Veth, Vex

Disqualified 2.0 (no dad):

FCG, Kingsley,* Molly*

*Even if you count Lucien's parents as Kingsley and Molly's biological "parents," Lucien both knew them and killed them, taking them all clear out of contention.

Honourable mentions:

Orym. The one who first made us think, is Chetney _____'s dad? Alas, we know from EXU that Orym's biological dad went by the name "Tarrintel" - that is not to say that it was not, perhaps, an alias of Chetney's once upon a time, but it would hardly be consistent branding for C-Pop Industries.

Scanlan. While we know that Scanlan's father was not in his life, Scanlan did at least know enough about his father to say that his name was "Vicou." Again, it's possible that this is another Chetney alias, but be honest, can you really see Chetney ever going by the name "Vicou"? Would also be very awkward with Number 1 on this list...

And now, on to the rankings!

4. Yasha. Does not remember her biological parents, and it's not impossible that Chetney might have swung by southern Xhorhas in his travels. On the whole though, I'd give it worse odds than the other names on this list.

3. Bertrand. International man of mystery Bertrand Bell is so enigmatic that at one point, it was even speculated that he was the Lord of the Crossroads over in Vasselheim. He does appear to be fully human, but it would be mildly funny if he "exited" the story right before his father came in, which is why he's higher than Yasha.

2. Fjord. Who's to say that his other biological parent wasn't a half-orc who had a great night or two with Exandria's best woodworker?

1. Pike. We actually don't know terribly much about the Trickfoot family, or Pike's parents. What we do know is that at some point, Pike's parents left her with her cousins and went to Wynandir. Now would Chetney do a thing like that? Hard to say. There's nothing saying that Pock O'Pea is his birth name - he could mayhaps have been born a Trickfoot who, say, got in really hot water over in Tal'Dorei and had to flee to Wildemount?

In conclusion, Critical Role has spent a great deal of time pondering the all-important question, "What is that mother's name?" However, it is perhaps time that we all start asking, "What is that father's name?" and maybe even, "Are you my freaking dad?"

[waitineedaname]

shoes in FMA rated on how comfortable they'd be to fight in

Edward Elric

considering Ed's uhhh very distinct taste in aesthetics, these could be a lot worse. they look relatively comfortable and don't seem like they'd be difficult to move around in. they are platforms though, which I imagine makes things more difficult. I'll be generous and give these a 7/10

Most of the Amestrian military

pretty much everyone in uniform wears the same shoes, so I'm lumping them all together. these are Roy's, if that matters. they look fine. I imagine that because it is part of a military uniform, it's designed to be moved around in and worn for hours on end, so ideally they're relatively comfortable. it doesn't look like there's much traction, but they're usually fighting on flat surfaces so whatever. 8/10

Fu and Lan Fan

these shoes fucking rule. the picture I've included is Lan Fan's, but they wear p much the same shoes. I fucking love these things. they have spikes. Edward Elric fucking wishes. considering this seems to be part of the bodyguard uniform, I'd imagine they're as easy to run around in as the military shoes, if not better since they're expected to be doing martial arts in them. but most importantly, they have spikes. 10/10, no notes.

Ling and Mei

on the topic of doing martial arts, both Ling and Mei wear these.... I'm not sure what they are. flats? slippers? it's unclear. (EDIT: they are apparently Kung Fu shoes!) they seem relatively easy to move around in I guess since they're not very cumbersome and both Ling and Mei rely on being very nimble. they look like they have absolutely no support in the soles though, which is gonna get painful after a certain point. also depending on what fabric they're made of, they could definitely start chafing. I've worn flats. I know that hell. 7/10 for the potential blisters, but at least they're designed specifically for martial arts

Greedling and Bradley

it's hard to get a good shot in this scene because neither of them stop moving, but I swear to god, they're fighting in dress shoes. I cannot stand them. this CANNOT be comfortable. I know Greed prioritizes aesthetics over function so this was probably a compromise between his and Ling's tastes but ohhh my god. he was probably wasting so much of the philosopher's stone just passively healing the million blisters on his feet from running around in these things. there's a chance Bradley is wearing the military uniform shoes but I think he was in more formal dress when he got blown the fuck up, so I don't think so. no wonder he complains about being sore, quit running around in dress shoes you fucking moron. 4/10.

Greed

THESE FUCKING THIIIIIIIINGS. WHY ARE THEY POINTY AT THE END. WHY DOES IT LOOK LIKE SOMEONE HIT HIS FOOT WITH A MALLET AND FLATTENED THEM. he's so dumb. I love him. looking at these things tells me he would probably wear goth cowboy boots if he could, and tbh that would probably look better. 3/10 for Greed's overall silly as hell fashion sense

Lust

okay. the heels make sense considering her whole vibe. however. these are part of her fucking BODY. when she gets incinerated, they grow back. can she even take them off???? I'm scared to ask. I guess if theyre part of her body, she doesn't have to worry about adjusting to balancing in them like you would normally with heels, but oh my god. she can never wear normal shoes. I would also be murderous if I had to wear heels all the time. 4/10.

Father and Izumi

guys. these are sandals. it has been four hundred years and Father is still wearing the same outfit he was wearing in the damn desert. find a new outfit man. Izumi is apparently wearing bathroom slippers (hence the WC) so idk why she's even wearing those out of the house. Father gets 0/10 and Izumi gets 1/10 because she still manages to kick everyone's asses while wearing these, so respect

Envy

PUT YOUR FUCKING TOES AWAY. -10000000/10

[butterflysonnets]

yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

[captainofthetidesbreath]

I support Dorian's beef against the Spider Queen, everyone should have a beef with the Spider Queen, not even JUST over Opal or like the underdark stuff (but absolutely for both of that too) but because everyone should have beef with Lolth by default 😤

[crehador]

the current state of the one with the clones is me whispering to clone!ichiro you have got to fuck him faster than this and him hissing back i am fucking trying?? because this 4p clone sex pwp is now

and there's still. there's still no fucking p.

[vieramars]

It's SO funny to stick my head into stardew valley tumblr from magnus archives/protocol tumblr. 80-90% of my blorbos psychologically torture and eat people to survive and I'm expected to hate Pierre for being closed on Wednesdays and Elliott for being too silly.

[jonathan-cranes-mistress-of-fear]

Georgia twink loves his bears

[rotisseries]

i have GOT to stop going and checking out the notes on... that one post.... but it's CRAZY to me that people keep reblogging it very seriously being like "HOW CAN PEOPLE LIKE HENRY HE MURDERED 20 CHILDREN"

you mean the fictional child murder?? you mean the fake fictional child murder?? you mean the fake fictional telekinetic sci fi child murder by fake fictional telekinetic sci fi murder man on fake fictional telekinetic sci fi horror netflix show stranger things??? YOU MEAN THAT FAKE MURDER???

no you're so right there's never once been a history of fandoms liking a guy even if he did a bit of fake fictional murder what an insane concept

[crystalkitty1220]

Man I wonder where the leader of the fear realm could've gone, it's alMOST LIKE NEVIN HAS AN

[becauseanders]

my god this is such a fucking stupid first world problem but i am literally crying righ tnow about the da:tv release date because there is no way in fuck i am going to be able to save up the kind of money it will take to purchase something that can play it like i think it was easier when it didn't quite feel real and i feel so fucking dumb but as a spooky bitch da:tv coming out on halloween feels like a fucking personal attack

[hunter-sylvester]

undefined

Let me make something very clear

[vincent-sinclair-deserved-better]

hm

thinking of my blorbos but not in a "i love you you love me all is well" way but a "i love you hope you kill me" way lol

[transmasc-rose]

"I was just about to phone. It's on every channel. Oh, hello, Amy dear. Are you a policewoman now?" "Well, sometimes." "I thought you were a nurse." "I can be a nurse." "Or actually a nun?" "I dabble."

I wanted to mess around with drawing before I have to work on commissions. So. Amy :)

Fake Q&A I made Last Time I drew Amy under the cut

Q: why are you poorly drawing sexy amy? A: I was bored and didn't want to work on anything important.

Q: are you horny for amy? A: categorically no. she is useful for horny scenarios but I am not horny for any character. her and nardole are on equal playing fields on that front. however one of these characters is significantly more likely to be in this scenario.

Q: don't you complain about the show sexualizing amy? A: I complain about the show doing it without nuance. theres a difference. I think Amy Pond sexualizing herself as a response to her life experiences makes a lot of sense. I dont think moffat thought about it that hard. I have a lot of opinions on this subject.

Q: how could they have handled that topic in a kids show? A: they already made her a kissogram and invoked the idea of a sex worker for her. addressing how/why she got there and how others see her as a sexual object and so she uses that to her advantage is not stepping further than that.

Q: wow. ok. sorry i asked A: amys autonomy and how she expresses it and how its taken from her is both a significant theme of her seasons and completely glossed over in favour of using her as a love interest/the hinge of the love triangle/11 in general/her daughter and her worth and happiness is tied to her love of rory and when she cannot serve that role (ie older!amy) she is killed. I can and will talk about Amy Pond all day. forever. try me. I will. come on. this whole faq was an excuse to talk about her more--

[strqyr]

it's been long enough that i feel it's safe for my own sanity to talk about this, but nothing has made me almost rage quit an episode more than the V9 finale, when ruby stays back and yang turns back to her to ask her what's wrong, and ruby starts with "when i was in the tree" and then pauses for long enough that i'm like oh boy here we go :DD and then, THEN she starts talking about some MOUSE???

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

like ex-fucking-cuse me???? you want to run that back one more time?????