وہ ایک پیار کی خالص نظر
جس کی تلاش اور انتظار میں
تم نے اپنی ساری عمر بِتا دی
شاید وہ نظر تمہارے لیے
اِس دنیا میں اُتری ہی نہیں
چھوڑ دو اب یہ لا حاصل کوشش
اور ختم کردو یہ سارے جھمیلے
جو تم نے اُس ایک نظر کے لیے اپنے ارد گرد سجا رکھے ہیں ۔۔۔
—پری زاد
woh aik pyaar ki khalis nazar
jis ki talaash aur intezaar main
tum ne apni saari umr bata di
shayad woh nazar tumhare liye
iss duniya main utri hi nahi
chor do ab yeh la haasil koshish
aur khatum kar do yeh saare jhamele
jo tum ne uss aik nazar k liye apne ird gird saja rakhe hain…
—parizaad
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Vitya
I sometimes (a LOT) think about Victor. I think about that bone-deep exhaustion we see come across his face when not even a minute after the gold medal ceremony, he's being asked about his next program.
I think about how lonely it must be, being an untouchable idol held to a standard with no one there to share it with him.
I think about those moments, his dog the only being in the world he lets in all the way, wondering when his world started to look gray. When "strength must be found on your own" became a slow and monotonous march toward misery.
When skating stopped feeling like a passion.
I think about Victor wondering what ever happened to Yuuri Katsuki, who got drunk and danced with him, who proclaimed be my coach only to disappear into the ether again, even though Worlds was in Tokyo.
I think about that trudge, when Victor is looking at two programs that both don't feel quite right, hearing about Yuri Plisetsky the new Russian phenom, who Victor obviously would be passing the baton to. How much more lonely that would be.
I think about Victor, sitting by himself at his apartment, snuggling his dog and watching Yuuri Katsuki suddenly blow up his phone again with a rendition of Stay Close to Me.
And remembering Be My Coach
I think about Victor's butterflies leaping from his stomach as he rehearses the perfect opening line, naked in the Katsuki onsen.
Then I think about Victor, adopted by the Katsukis and Hasetsu, falling in love, and watching as Yuuri falls in love in kind, not with the mask, not with the idol, not even with the skater.
With Vitya.
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credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers credit gif makers
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hello little stars ✨ and welcome back to Tag Game Tuesday!
name: space mace 🪐
age: in the last 2 weeks of my 20s
pronouns: she/her
tell me about one of your hobbies: i wire wrap crystals and make cute little necklaces! i've been doing it for about 5 years 💫
what languages do you speak? English, Customer Service, and enough Spanish to take orders at work (¿qué tamaño? ¿algo más?)
one of your comfort movies: The Birdcage 🌈
do you have any kids? do you want any? no and no. i nannied for 14 years and helped raise two dozen children, i'm tapped out!
cold weather or hot weather? cold cold cold ❄️
you're at an amusement park. what ride are you going on first? about to scream out all my frustrations on the first roller coaster i see 🎢
what's your go-to hairstyle/how do you wear your hair most days? if i'm at work it's in a ponytail, otherwise i wear it down. my hair is naturally curly so it's usually quite fluffy!
who was your top artist in your spotify wrapped/apple music replay in 2022? billie eilish 🎶
you've just been handed $1000 but you have to spend it on clothes. where are you shopping? every thrift store in Chicagoland
wireless or corded headphones? they hate me for my corded headphone swag 💅🏻
finally, tell me something that sparks joy: rainy days 🌧
i’m tagging @gardenerian, @iansfreckles, @ewanroys, @heymrspatel, @metalheadmickey, @whatwouldmickeydo, @gallawitchxx, @whatthebodygraspsnot, @howlinchickhowl, @squidyyy23, @sleepyfacetoughguy, @purplemagpie, @sickness-health-all-that-shit, @vintagelacerosette, @7x10mickey, @creepkinginc, @mishervellous, @crossmydna, @y0itsbri, @thisdivorce, @rereadanon, @tectonicduck, @energievie, @deathclassic, @deedala, @palepinkgoat, @callivich, @michellemisfit, @thepupperino, @xninetiestrendx, @ardent-fox, @captainjowl, @whaticameherefor, @arrowflier, @too-schoolforcool, @grumble-fish, & @auds-and-evens 💛
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Small life (?) update
21/01/2024
I'm proud of a little thing that happened today and I will scream about it! I managed to open and use the computer :)
I spent almost 5 months not touching it due to a fun little... phobia (?) I developed of it (specifically, of my own personal computer. I can use other pcs just fine).
Checked that it was working a couple of weeks ago, and today I managed to sit down and write some stuff/edit a lil thing for about an hour without getting an anxiety attack. I'd say that's pretty neat!
I hope that next I'll be able to sit down and relearn how to use krita, little by little, and that I'll be able to make myself sit down and buy a ps plus subscription so I can play bloodborne with some pals. I'd like to get the ps plus subscription by the end of the month, so I'll need to pester a friend to help me out because I'm kinda stupid with technology. As for krita, I hope that by next year I'll be able to draw digitally again.
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