#dreamy's school diary

[i-eat-lip-gloss]

let me tell u

the most accepted i’ve ever felt, the most majestic and inspiring thing i’ve ever seen,

was on the first day of pride at school last year.

more than half the kids there were dressed in something pride. quite a few of them had flag capes, umbrella even saw a kid with a trans flag. there were so many kids and people dressed their queer-best for pride, rainbows, flags, and all. i have never felt so accepted in school or ever in my entire life. sure there were some kids who got kinda pissed at it, but they were really outnumbered so it didn’t matter. one kid said “it’s just June not dress up like fruit loops!” and i honestly burst out laughing. at lunch me and all my friends had little pencil flags (the pole is a pencil; made my umbrella) and Lint had a pretty well sized rainbow flag, and as a group of kids were walking past our table to go get hot lunch, one of them as walking leaned forward and said “eeewwww” but we all honestly laughed. it was pride month, we were being rlly represented, we were too strong to even care. that’s the beauty of pride month to me, it empowers us queers by being and feeling so accepted and represented we’re too strong (emotionally) to care abt what anyone else says

[eyeimagerysexy]

tee hee (>ᴗ<✿)

[lilmashae]

first and last! — park sunghoon x female reader

wordcount: 3.4k | warnings: eventual smut, light angst, maybe some form of enemies to lovers, petnames, weird timestamps (skips) | summary: your unrequited love, park sunghoon realizes just how much he needs you: resulting in a rekindling of past love! | author's note: i think i lost the plot somewhere along the way... oops !

you wake up to a sunny morning, drawing back your curtains to let the light flood your room. it felt like a perfect day: your uniform fit just right, the sun beamed brilliantly, and the flowers outside painted a pretty picture. but nothing quite matched the charm of sunghoon, your neighbor, pacing in his room across the lawn, searching for something. you often stole glances at him through his window — studying, getting ready, or simply lost in thought. however, today he caught you staring, and after receiving a small wave from you, he simply huffed and closed his blinds.

despite being neighbors with a thin lawn being the only thing separating you, your worlds couldn't be more different. in yours, sunghoon was everything, while in his, you barely registered. yet, you weren't persistent, except when it mattered — like now, with your long term crush on him ever since you were younger and your parents would force you two to have playdates.

"hey park!" you'd call out from behind him as you two walked to school together in the eighth grade. "y/n..."

sure, he wasn't always the nicest, but it was his moments of kindness that stood out to you: like when he helped you up after watching you fall off your bike when you were younger, or standing up to your bullies in the tenth grade. he was always there for you when it truly mattered, wiping your tears and helping you up — even helping you pass every exam, calming your mind when you were frustrated. "fuck, i just can't do it!" you cursed with your head buried into your arms. "you're fine, y/n... you've got it all under control, okay?"

as you grew up, you also couldn't help but notice his sudden attractiveness too. he was everything you’d written about in your diary: dreamy and smart. meanwhile, he seemed indifferent, brushing off your affection without a second thought.

you crossed paths every day, attending the same high school and walking home together. "hey, sunghoon! wait up!" every time your eyes met, your heart skipped a beat—maybe there was he liked you in the slightest? but those hopes usually crashed against the reality of sunghoon's cold responses.

"i don't want to be late," he'd say — his voice monotone yet strangely comforting to you. you'd try to engage him, but his indifference always kept you at arm's length.

one afternoon, when the school was empty, you mustered the courage to confess your feelings — only to be met with rejection, delivered with a cruelty that cut deeper than any blade could. it hurt more than you expected, realizing that your pursuit of him was absolutely fruitless.

he'd been your neighbor your whole life, yet he'd always been so distant — that sliver of lawn must've been a lot bigger than you remembered. even from childhood to adolescence and now adulthood, you were always the one chasing him, praying for a flourishing love that never bloomed in the slightest. and as he walked away, leaving you shattered, you finally grasped the depth of his indifference.

through tears, you faced the truth: you'd clung to false hope for years. despite trying to move on, sunghoon's memory lingered, haunting your every thought — and as you left for college, you looked back at his house one last time, reminiscing about your silly crush on park sunghoon, your neighbor who never really cared about you.

.

you spent most of your summer with your friends, going out to keep your mind off of sunghoon — and for the most part, it worked. you went on spontaneous trips with friends — even going to australia with your friend, jake — staying there for almost half of your break. you went to festivals and picked up new hobbies: meeting new people and laughing wherever you went. with each new experience, sunghoon’s memory faded, replaced by smiles and bonding, the haunting chills of your childish stupidity melting away as you embraced living in the moment, rediscovering your love. 

the months flew by quickly, you ended up spending your last few weeks before college with your family at home, not once did you open your window and look out at his house — totally at peace with his rejection.

.

it was your first day and admittedly you were nervous — walking on a new campus full of strangers, except for one or two friends. you reminded yourself that everything'd be fine: you looked good adorned in your new clothes and hairstyle — your books were secure in your tote bag and your laptop was charged. you were more than ready, and the day'd be perfect.

you took a deep breath before entering your first class, finding a seat near the door — scrolling through your phone until the professor arrived with the syllabus review. "y/n!" you peered over your shoulder at the door, one of your friends waving at you with a huge smile plastered on her face. "hey, it's good to see you." she sat beside you, the two of you talking about your summers until the class began.

"how long've you been on campus?"

"hm... maybe a while, i moved into my dorm a couple of days ago." you replied as you finished packing. "oh, so have you been to the café down the street? there's this barista... he's so cute!" she nudged your shoulder as the two of you walked out. "i can't say i've been… i’m not busy later, we can go if you want?” 

“great! i’ll see you then, okay?” you nodded, waving her off as you walked to your next class until you’d see her later that evening.

.

the cafe was cozy — warm and welcoming. as you and your friend queued up to order your drinks, you couldn't shake off the sense of anticipation. but what caught you off guard was the barista behind the counter, who looked oddly familiar. he flashed a warm smile, "hey there, what can i get for you?"

holy shit.

your heart skipped a beat as you looked up, stunned to see sunghoon standing behind the counter, wearing an apron in place of their old highschool uniform. you blinked in disbelief, trying to process the unexpected encounter. sunghoon, the same person you’d had spent years pining over, was the same one taking your coffee order. “are you ready to order?” you’d spaced out — lost in thought.

your friend nudged you, breaking you out of your daze. “y/n! what’d you want?” with a slightly shaky voice, you swallow your embarrassment: “uh, sorry.” an awkward laugh abruptly pushed past your lips. “americano… please.” you were trying to act casual despite the flutter of excitement in your chest. “a matcha, please!” your friend orders and he nods. as sunghoon prepares your drink, your eyes met briefly — you can’t help but feel a rush of adrenaline, wondering if he remembers you.

after receiving your drink, you thanked sunghoon with an uneasy smile, feeling a mix of disbelief and curiosity. “thanks.” you begin walking back to your table, but not before hearing that weirdly comforting monotone voice. “yeah, of course.” it seemed the roles were reversed, with you being the one walking away from him instead. It wasn’t until after you left that sunghoon’d realized how much he’d really liked you — he missed walking to school together and catching you glance at him through your perfectly aligned bedroom windows. and when he ran across that sliver of grass, knocking on your door, your mom answered, “she’s gone out of the country, sunghoon, i’m sorry.”

“do you know when she’ll be back?” 

“some time before you kids start school, but i can’t be sure.”

sunghoon couldn’t dare let you get away again — not after sitting in his room all summer, coming to terms with the fact that you’d probably never want to see him again. 

 “hey, uhm y/n?”

 it was an unexpected twist to your first day of college, but you didn’t want to  deny the spark of intrigue that ignited within you when he called out. you leaned on your heel, turning around swiftly. “yeah… sunghoon, right?” he nodded, and suddenly, your mouth felt dry. "it's been a while!" you awkwardly smiled — this wasn't the ideal situation, but it's still your first day and you have to make it work. "mhm... how've you been?"

it was all so new to you, how he seemed to take interest in your life: when you two were younger, it felt like it was always you — starting a bland conversation, asking how he was, greeting him in hallways with a warm smile: putting in the effort. but this once with sunghoon smiling at you and asking how you were, you felt your heart swooning. " 'good, thanks." you looked down, swirling the liquid of your cup around in the cup. "what about..."

"y/n! hey, are you coming?" your friend's voice pierced through your own. it was hard to believe you were looking at your childhood crush who's now even more handsome than when you last saw him — more skilled and finally giving you the attention you once so desperately craved and part of you still does.

.

as the weeks passed by, you'd learn college was a lot easier than you thought it'd be. you'd made a small group of friends: supportive and comforting.

the few of you would occasionally get together to study at the cafe, allowing you time closer to sunghoon as you two'd indulge in small talk. you must say, highschool you would've been through the roof — not that you weren't already buzzing with excitement. luckily, none of your classes were overwhelmingly difficult. they'd all passed by pretty simply. however, that didn't mean you weren't overwhelmed yourself.

you sat down in the corner of the small campus cafe with your hands buried inside of your hands. the dim and cozy lighting was perfect for studying and taking notes — but it was also making your eyelids feel heavier, stressing you out. "i hate finals..." you groaned, waiting for your drink. "y/n!"

walking up to the counter, sunghoon'd noticed the look of distress on your face. "here's your drink... 'everything alright?" he offered a sympathetic smile while handing you the drink. "finals..." you mumbled, taking a sip of the coffee before sighing yet again. "it's not that i suck at studying... i'm great at it! i'm just nervous and all of these theories are making my head hurt." you really were the same — sunghoon laughed, "i can help you... only if you need it?" just like when you were younger... your eyes lit up, his offer gave you a rush of dopamine. "really? that'd be great... i... i can pay you, and..."

"y/n, relax. it's fine, it won't be the first time i've tutored you," he snorts. "i guess you're right, seriously thank you."

.

it was endearing, you two were closer than ever — for the first time it felt like he was actually with you. sunghoon worked his shifts in the bustling campus café, finding himself more and more drawn to your presence amidst the sea of students: you soft laughs and beaming smile whenever you felt confident in an answer — with a warm smile and a willingness to help, he offered his assistance whenever you came in to study.

day by day, your shared laughter and easy camaraderie polluted the air as you two grew closer through shared struggles and small victories. it felt as though you'd known each other for a lifetime — really known eachother, not just as neighbors or two different bodies. as you navigated the stress of finals week side by side, you each found solace in each other's company — meeting in the cafe and library, even occasionally your dorm.

you weren't having the best day — busy and slightly overwhelmed. but it was warm, the gentle spring wind prickling your skin as you entered the library. you felt at ease meeting the comforting scent of books and vanilla. but seeing sunghoon only made your heart race yet again — the dimly lit building perfectly illuminated sunghoon's face, stirring so many emotions within you. "hey..." he broke you out of your trance, waving you over with a supple smile — notes already adorning the small desk as e sorted through them. "sorry, i'm late." you replied, pulling out your computer, opening your notes. suddenly, you felt something next to your hand. "what's that?" you asked, eyes still glued to the page in front of you. "your order."

what was he talking about? you looked away and then at him, confused.

"you didn't come to the cafe, so i figured you got busy — brought it to you since i knew we'd be getting together." the drink sat before you, still cold. "oh... thanks, sunghoon." picking it up, you noticed the small note attached to the cups side. "it's okay if you get busy, i just hope you'll keep coming to see me :)" you took a sip, rereading the note in your head and smiling against the lid of the cup. "good?" he asked, "not bad, park." you nudged him, the two of you giggling before beginning work.

that wouldn't be the last time he'd make your heart pace, but little did you know, he felt the exact same.

you two sat at the desk in his dorm, he thought you looked absolutely gorgeous with your hair pulled back, glasses leaning off the tip of your nose. you were so adorable, working so hard with your lips pursed in concentration. "so, i think that..." you trailed off, turning your head to look at him. "sunghoon? is there something on my face?" your hands darted to your cheeks, frantically searching — which only made him chuckle at you antics. "hey," he grabbed your wrist, stopping your panicked motions, "there's noting on your face." you stared into his eyes, you're so pretty... "no?" sunghoon shook his head, "no. but..." his other free hand came reaching towards you, tucking a piece of hair somewhere behind you. "...thanks." you murmured, slightly under your breath not even noticing how close your faces were... sunghoon doesn't know what happened in that moment but it felt right, pecking a chaste kiss on your lips.

.

and maybe that's how you ended up underneath him? with your glasses far disregarded and your hair messily thrown, huffing as you two's lips met and molded together in yet another embrace. "fuck... y/n, i really like you." all your previous memories fade away into obscurity, one image remains vividly clear: sunghoon — not the person you once resented in your childhood, but the one you've come to love more than ever. the one who notices small things, makes you laughs, and picks you up when your down. "i like you too..."

you two found yourselves drawn to one another, your tongues intricately tying themselves into a knot. with trembling hands, sunghoon gently cupped your face, pulling you closer into him. his knee meeting your core sending a shiver down your spine as you leaned into his embrace with your arms wrapped around his neck.

your lips met in yet another a fervent kiss, a silent symphony of longing as you lost themselves in each other's kiss — time seemed to stand still as you explored each other with an unwavering hunger, moaning into each other’s mouths and pleading for more. your bodies moved in perfect harmony as they sought to get closer and feel every inch of each other's skin: you threw your shirt over your head and onto the floor. “ ‘so pretty, all the time… ‘wanted to kiss you for so long.” his hands pawing the side of your hips. “shit… ‘should’ve done it sooner, hoonie…” you sighed into the plush of his lips watching as he too removed his shirt.

you were eager, feeling his hardened length caressing your clothed clit. "is this what you want, pretty girl? y/n, please tell me what you want..." you nod, feeling his hands embrace your face yet again for another kiss. "use your words..." he huffed, nipping at your bottom lip, "please, sunghoon... i want this so bad."

his hands were sliding down your sides to reach your waistband, tugging your pants off and trailing kisses down your abdomen. his fingers lingered on the small of your skin — softly tracing imaginary inscriptions, leaving a trail of bruising kisses leading to the waist of your underwear:

pulling them aside he stared in awe at your bare cunt, your puffy clit and semislick folds, staring up at you once more, smirking — leaving another kiss above your cute little clit before licking a stripe up your whole cunt. "shit, you taste so sweet, y/n."

his tongue was hot, prodding at your sticky entrance. "f-fuck..." you huffed out, hands tangled in his hair. sunghoon's so soft and intimate — cherishing this moment as his lips graze and carefully suck your clit with his arms wrap around your thighs, nuzzling further into you heat before slipping two of his fingers inside of you. "such a sweet girl... 'sweet cunt too, 'can't ever let you go again..." you nodded you head, feeling the girth of sunghoon's fingers made you whine. "hoon..." you squirmed under him as he lapped your cunt eagerly, fingers pumping and curling in and out of your sopping cunt. "shit!" he was hungry — he's been waiting for this for what feels like an eternity. "so good, y/n... pussy's so good..." he hummed into your warmth, the vibrations sending chills across your whole body. "fuck, i might cum... sunghoon, please!" he was close too: about to cum practically untouched by rutting into the mattress — getting off on your sweet moans.

his tongue lapped your cunt eagerly — and right when you were about to cum, he suddenly stopped. "why'd... fuck, why'd you do that?" trying to catch your breath you look down at him, chin coated in slick and breathy heavy. he hushed you with yet another soft peck on the lips. "s'okay, 'wanted you to cum on my cock... 'sound good, baby?" he asked in a hushed voice. right now, sunghoon wanted nothing more than to give you the world.

you were so pretty with your fluttering cunt and fucked out face. "y-yeah..." you nodded, anticipating the feeling of his length stretching you out. you watched as he pulled down his sweatpants and breifs, his cock springing out. "s'pretty.." you spoke quietly to yourself, admiring his leaking pinky tip and the veins adorning his cock, slightly curved up and to the left. he tugged at it a couple of times before aligning it with your entrance, easily plunging in and kissing your cervix, bottoming out immediately. "shit! so fucking wet... pussy's so warm, y'know that? s'perfect, fuck!" he groaned, babbling to himself about what felt like nothing.

your tight gummy walls swallowed him so well, leaving him speechless. each thrust, he lost himself deeper and deeper inside of your cunt, hitting your g-spot several times, making you flinch. it turned him on so much, seeing that ring of cream around the base of his cock and watching you squirm and moan under him. "fuck, hoonie, feels so good..!"

"shit... i love when you call me hoonie, y/n! s'tight, ah, shit! say it again: my name, call me hoonie, baby."

"hoonie, please... 'think i'm 'gonna cum!" his thrusts grew sloppier — more desperate as he grew closer to spraying your walls a sticky white. "feel me?" his hand applied pressure to your abdomen, his cock bulging out of your tummy. "oh, fuck..."

"yeah, babygirl... 'hoonie's right... here." his hips relentlessly snapped into yours as he firmly held you down. "mpf! sunghoon, i'm 'gonna cum!"

"go ahead, y/n." another kiss, right on the lips. "cum f'me, yeah?" as you felt the knot in your stomach quickly unraveling, you could feel yourself clenching around the girth of sunghoon's cock. you wished you could stay this way forever, bodies firmly pressed against one another in a warm embrace, lips perfectly bonded as you stared into each other's eyes.

.

the next time you saw sunghoon, was a week after. you'd run into his arms for a tight hug. "hoonie! i passed, i passed my finals!" he picked you up, peppering your face generously with kisses, "i'm so proud of you," and as you looked up into his eyes, you'd remembered everything — good and bad: rejection and fear and a strange curiosity that led to this: everything you'd always wanted. but most importantly you saw him, park sunghoon: the love of your life.

guidelines and disclaimers | took me way too long to write ! i have no fucking idea where this went but hopefully someone likes it a lot 😭

[smuttycentre]

THE FIRST VAMPIRE pt.1 (MATT DONOVAN)

M/n: Male reader

Word Count:

Synopsis: You are the original vampire. Unkillable. And you plan to conquer and fuck every man in Mystic Falls. Step 1. Get a house. This is set in Series one.

Warnings: non-con, compell, finger sucking, spit in mouth, sniffing armpits, sniffing sweat, ball sucking, blowjob, swallow

Author Note: This will be part of a series where you are an upgraded original vampire in The Vampire Diaries. You can compel anyone and everyone including the originals, witches and hunters. The goal is to fuck everybody in this series while following the timeline of the original series and introducing new characters as they come into the show.

You have lived thousands of years but never before have you seen a town with such delicious men. You have big plans for Mystic Falls. You have been watching for a while. There are the two new brothers in town who are vampires and their obsession’s little brother Jeremy. There is the Mayors son, Tyler. And there is the sweet, innocent Matt. Matt Donovan. He is your target.

You’ve been planning on making an empire of men. Men for you to play with, dispose of and make use of. Your own personal obedient slaves. Matt is an easy first target. Not too popular at school, no parent in the house and a stoner sister. He looks damaged and you take pity on him. You know you can make his life better by introducing yourself into his life.

You are at the Mystic Grill, Matt is working and you can’t stop looking at him. He hasn’t noticed you but not to worry, he will devote his life to you in no time.

You’ve ordered your favourite drink a few times hoping that he is the one to deliver it. He hasn’t yet. You are waiting for your next drink when you see him coming over.

He gets to your table and places your drink in front of you. You grab his hand, you make eye contact and say “Thank you”. His hand is wet from all the drinks he has been making but you don’t mind. You start to compel him.

“What time do you finish?”

“9pm” he replies

“Once you finish your shift, wait for me outside. Don’t tell anyone”

You let go of his hand, give him a smile and he walks away. You take a sip of your drink and wait.

…

It is 9pm and you are waiting outside the bar. It is winter and dark out. There are a few people walking by but no one close enough to stop you from completing your mission.

You wait a few minutes. You don’t feel any cold. Matt comes out and notices you. Still in his uniform and comes over. You look him in the eyes and start to compel:

“You belong to me. Everything you own is mine, everything you touch is mine. You are mine. You will do anything I ask. You will please me in every way possible. Do you understand?”

“Yes Master” he replied.

“Master? Hmm” you thought to yourself. You like the sound of that.

“Now, Matt Donovan. Take me to your house. I am going to live there from now on”

He nodded and held out his hand. This is going to be fun. You took his hand, interlaced fingers and started walking to his home.

…

“I invite you in to my home. After you” your new servant said. You stepped inside his house and made your way to the living room.

“Would you like a drink?” He asking trying to please you. You held out your arm and gestured him towards you. You looked at him and noticed his dreamy blue eyes. You leaned in for a kiss. As your lips touched you could hear his heart racing, but not from panic, from excitement. You then moved towards his neck and started kissing there. Matt moaned a little as his eyelids stuttered. You opened your mouth and bit him. You felt his warm blood enter your mouth and filling you up. You have been around for a long time and can control every ounce of your thirst. You control it, it doesn’t control you.

After a few seconds you put your fangs away and look back at him. He is still staring at you deeply waiting for a purpose. Waiting to please you more. You take your fingers and wipe off the excess blood on his neck and sucked your fingers.

You then looked at Matt. You had an idea. You take your fingers out of your mouth and put them towards his lips. He already knew exactly what you wanted as his mouth was open ready to receive. You stuck four fingers into his mouth, it was bigger than you thought.

You seductively move your fingers in and out of his mouth, allowing him to get every part of each finger wet.

You take you wet hand out and put each finger into your mouth and tasted Matts saliva.

You placed your wet hand on the back of his neck, held him tight and went in for another kiss - this time with tongue. Matt was acting on every impulse. As soon as you allowed him to dominate, he dominated and stuck his tongue in your mouth. But when you took back dominance he didn’t fight, he only allowed it and it seemed almost as if he was thankful for giving him purpose.

You release your grasp on his lips and look at him one more time.

“Open your mouth” you order. He obliges. You manoeuvre all your saliva in your mouth and bring it to the front. You move closer to his warm, wet lips almost as if to kiss again but at the last minute you thrust your spit right into his mouth. He twitches but accepts you.

“Swallow” you command and he does. “Good boy Matt. I can see we are going to have lots of fun together.”

“Take me to your room” you say. He turns and you follow him upstairs.

When you get to his room you turn the light on, shut the door and then turn to him.

“We are going to have a little fun tonight. Think of it as a little initiation into my gang. I have big plans for you.”

You walk up to him and look him in the eyes. “I also forgot. You will not tell anyone about me. When I’m not around, I am not in your mouth. You will remain living life as normal unless I have requests. You will not mention me to anyone apart from the people in our gang. Our circle. Which for now is just you… my little play toy.”

Matt gave a nod of understanding.

You then start undressing yourself. “Get naked, you’re with me now, let’s be gay” You watch as Matt takes off his work uniform. He takes off his underwear showing his chunky flaccid penis.

You tilt your head in confusion.

“Come here.” You order. “From now on, every time you see me or think of me you a horny. The horniest you have even been before. You will not act on this however until I give permission but you will always be ready. Also… no jerking off without me. I want your seed all to myself.”

As soon as the words left your mouth you see his penis begin to grow. Almost as like magic he was fully hard and pointing towards you knowing who its master is.

“Now, you’re human. Which is a shame so I can’t be as rough as I’d like to be with you. Not to worry. I can be soft and sensual”

You moved towards him and leaned in for a kiss. This one was ten times more passionate than the one downstairs. It was as if your spit was a magic elixir making him devoted to you.

You leaned back and he followed maintaining the connection. You fell onto to bed and he followed falling on top. You like like this. His legs were either side of yours and your dicks were touching.

His warm, human wet mouth was so fun to explore. At the same time you both start to touch and caress each other passionately. You were so in the moment you didn’t care who could hear.

All while maintaining the kissing, Matt started fingering your hard, horny nipples. You then pushed his head down into your armpits where he instinctively started sniffing you, getting to know your scent. Then, like a dog he started to lick your underarms, to claim you. You are his and he is yours.

He grabbed onto your penis and started to rub it up and down, the soft touch of his fingers made you gasp.

He then slithered his head down to your penis but carried on until he got to your balls. He gave you a look and you nodded to give permission.

Matts mouth opened wide enough to let his tongue come out. He started to lick your balls. They started tingling all new sensations that you have never felt before. He then managed to get one of your balls in his mouth and delicately sucked them.

He released the ball and went nose first into your deepest crevice of your groin. You hadn’t showered since the morning and Matt could tell. He was so turned on by your man-musk that he whispered “yes!”

Like the armpits he started licking in order to get the flavour of you inside him. Who would have thought a simple compulsion could make him do all this for you.

He started wanking you off again while switching between your balls and crotch. After a minute or so he stopped wanking and took a deep breath. He was at the head of your penis and he slowly tightened his lips against the top and slowly lowered his head further and further down until he took all that he could.

He stayed there as long as he could before he gagged and had to come up. This was it, the ice had been broken and there was no going back. He started bobbing his head up and down making you wet.

You made approving sighs and moans signalling him to keep going. Every suck was even better than the last. He kept this up for a while, not wanting to stop.

You suggest his head off and up close to your face. He is all sweaty from working on you. You bring him close for a kiss and your stick your tongue in.

“Are you ready for me to cum in your mouth?”

“Yes sir” he begged

“And do you want to swallow me?” You questioned

Without any hesitation Matt nodded “Yes”.

“Well then…” you kissed him “you’d better finish me off then” and he went back to his station and resumed sucking you off.

He gradually got faster and faster and deeper and deeper. You moved his right hand up to your mouth and you started to suck on his fingers. Up and down his head went as he tried to finish you off. It was working, you was so close to coming. Just a little longer…

“Arrrghhhh” you moaned as you shot seven loads right into the back of Matts throat - you’ve been saving up for him. Matt shuddered at the force of your seed going into him. He had stopped sucking at this point but was still tight around your dick and just looking at you longingly as he enjoyed the flavour of you for the first time and started to swallow.

After you could see he was done you move him back on top of you and started making out again. You pushed him over to the other side of the bed so that you were facing each other in the bed. He was looking at you.

“What?” You ask him.

“It’s just…” he paused. “Thank you.”

[lewmagoo]

bob does love texting you long messages because it’s what became his reality when he left for the naval academy after high school. it’s not his favorite; it just became the easiest way of communicating for a long while. though he does get a little kick out how surprised people are always when they see how fast he can type.

but those pages and pages of love letters when he’s deployed? he does those because he’s always wanted to. the feeling he got when your first letter arrived smelling like your perfume? he had an extra pep in his step around the carrier ship for about two weeks. he’d promised you that it wasn’t “corny” and that he’d like to keep writing you letters whenever he was called away. you both have each other’s letter saved in separate boxes around your home.

but i think, too, if he’s got the time and a modicum of privacy, bob would also love sending voice message texts. sure, you always want to see his beautiful face, but anyway you can get your husband is fine with you.

his voice is one of your favorite things about him. people that don’t really know him might joke about him being “so shy”, but his penchant for quiet is a thoughtful one. he doesn’t only speak spoken to or when he’s forced, but when he has something to say.

he can be a little slow on draw when it comes to introducing himself, you will admit…

your husband: the wide-eyed observer, the considerate listener, also a delightful little chatterbox when it’s a comfortable ear, yours especially, that’s been lent. 

bob can be a very emotional speaker when he gets going. his excited little gasps and silly little voices and inflections, the way his softened southern accent comes tumbling out with tiredness or just from the comfort of talking to you. you could make a montage of his twangy sign offs, “bye, honey. i love you so much.”

you are spot on with this. bob is a wordsmith. when he puts his pen to paper, he writes beautiful essays, expressing how much he loves you, how he misses you and longs for the day when you’re in his arms again. he updates you on some of the things going on, describing in detail the silly stories about his bunk mates, or tells you about something that happened that made him think of you. anything and everything, he puts in those letters. they’re a diary, of sorts. but you love them, because they’re pieces of him, a glimpse into that fascinating mind of his.

but then the voice messages? oh, they’re the sweetest things. i don’t know if you’ve ever seen JAG, but in the show, the main character’s dad recorded a bunch of audio tapes, talking to his son and his wife while he was deployed. that’s such a bob thing to do. he sends you little audio files talking about anything and everything. he gets so into what he’s saying. if he’s talking about something he’s super interested in, then he’s going a mile a minute. talking to you makes him feel at ease. you never make him feel like you’re annoyed with him, you never make him feel judged for babbling on about his latest special interest or whatever else he wants to talk about.

he always feels lighter after talking to you. even if it’s through audio messages. it puts him in a good mood, and his buds always know when he’s spoken to you, because he walks around with a dreamy smile on his face.

[likeadevils]

2003 Lover Diaries Transcripts

Mar 23, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Ok, where did I leave off? Friday. Ok, on Friday in school we had a “Code Red” drill. That’s when someone comes into the school and everybody gets freaked out and the teachers move all the students to the back of the room and turn off the lights. That night I had to babysit Austin while mom + dad went to a Vonda Shepard concert. Saturday mom and I got up early to go to NY for an hour ½ voice lesson. On the way we listened to a CD that mom bought from the concert the night before. It was this band called Sugarland and the lead singer is this girl that’s really good. I like their one song called “Baby Girl”

May 17, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Hey. Today Mom and I went to New York. We talked and laughed all the way up and parked in a garage near my voice lesson. We walked to her apartment and we worked on Smoky Black Nights after doing all of her warmups. I didn’t do it well @ first but she said that the song was “ingenious.” Cool. After mom and I went to this cowboy/western store nearby. We got a white shirt that buttons up, jeans, and a white T w/notes in it. Then we had pizza at a pizza place and walked back to the car stopping @ Tasti D-Lite, our FAVORITE ice cream store. It’s kosher, non-cholesterol, Extremely tasty, dreamy, frozen yogurt, and only 40 calories. Does it get any better than that? Then we went home and got movies. You know, sometimes I think about what my first kiss is going to be like. It’s going to be great and romantic. I’m such a romantic. I just dream about looking into someone’s eyes and feeling something I’ve never felt before, you know? I just never was able to put a face to my fantacy. But something tells me that my first kiss really far away from happening! Because the guys in our school aren’t even worth worrying about. They are all in it for one thing and I think you know what is, sex. I guess I’ll be okay without a first kiss!! XOXO Taylor

May 19, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Oh I was SUCH a b**** today! When mom picked me up, she was late again because she thought I had Varsity Singers. I was nasty to everybody!! Oh, I tried to practice my songs for Nashville, but I completely psyched myself out and broke down crying. I don’t know if I can do this. I want it so bad but I get so scared of what might not happen! When I miss notes, I dive bomb and the whole thing goes crashing down. I just have to breathe in … and breath out … breathe in …. relax, Nashville is not going to kill me … I can handle it. I’m okay. I’ll be fine. I’m young. I’m talented. They’ll see it in me. I’ll be ok. I’ve got to hang on. Can’t worry. I’m only 13. I’m allowed to make mistakes, right? Oh, this is a lot to handle. Taylor XOXO P.S. Pray for a better day tomorrow!

Jun 5, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Hey Journal, I had to sing @ the Garden Party today so Mom and I went to the field and got some of the equipment set up. Then we went home and I got ready. When we got there, all of my friends were there, and they helped set up (kind of). I started my show and in one first three chords of the first song, my guitar pick broke in half and flew out of my hands! There was this huge silence! It was awful! I had to bend over and pick it up in front of everyone! And while I was singing, this guy was shouting stuff like, “Go on, b*#@h! Sing that country bullsh*t! Go on motherf*cker!” It was awful. After the Garden Party, we all went to the Reading Hospital to visit Nanny. She looks worse everytime we go. I sang I Used to Fly, A Little More Like you and Same Girl for Nanny and her roommate, Penny. Penny has liver cancer and is bald from chemo. All of the nurses loved listening to it. It went really well. Then we went home and I worked on a song called Not One day. It’s ok, but I don’t know. Taylor Swift

Jun 19, 2003- Nashville, TN

Hey Diary, This morning, I woke up and I went over to RCA records and did a small showcase and “chatted” with them. We talked to this girl and she was really hip and cool with me. They really liked me and said they would call on Monday because she would be on vacation that weekend. Then we headed over to Capitol Records and met with the president and vice president of the company. They totally flipped out over me! They even said I was the most talented 13-year-old they had ever seen! They told me that I should be thanking God every day for the incredible gift he gave me. Well, I appreciate the compliment, but then they followed it up with “I’d just hate to see you jump into this right now and have a short-lived career.” They very politely agreed that country is directed to 35-year-olds. Radio just doesn’t play teens. That’s where I’m gonna prove them wrong! Well, he took me on a tour of the building and gave me about 25 cds of Capitol’s artists. Isn’t that nice? Then we went back to the hotel and then we went to the Bluebird Cafe, this cafe where like 4 songwriters go in and sing their songs. We sat all the way in the back. I have a radio call, meeting with Warner, and flight to catch tomorrow. I need my sleep!! Taylor I have a good feeling about RCA! <3

Jun 24, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Hey Diary, I got a record deal! AHHHHH! RCA records in Nashville wants to give me a development deal!!! We were taking Sassy to the airport (late) and when we headed home, we stopped at a Taco Bell. My manager called us on Mom’s cell and she gave the phone to me. He had Dad on conference call. He started out by saying, “Well, we got follow ups on all of the labels. And they think you need a couple years to grow so they can put you on the radio … Except for RCA, who wants to sign you!! Congratulations!” I was going crazy. I cried. I guess I never really expected to get one! It’s a development deal, but those are the only details we have. I told a bazillion people! We were making CDs for a New Hampshire concert I have Friday til 2:00 AM tonight. AHHH! Record deal! R • C • A baby! Taylor

Aug 25, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Hey, Today was my first day of school! And you won’t believe how much better 8th grade is than 7th!! The real problem last year was the grade above us, and now they’re 9th graders so we never see them. I love being older than the 7th graders! I never knew how stupid I must have looked, carrying around that HUGE book bag running and bumping into everybody trying to get to class on time! Okay, here’s my schedule! 1. Accel. integrated studies 2. science 3. american studies 4. latin 1 LUNCH 5. Accel. English 6. Accel Math 7. Intro. Computer studies 8. Chorus/Gym I think I might just live through this year!! I just hope I can keep up. My locker is 117 and my combination is 35-8-27. I love being older! I think my teacher’s gonna give me a spotlight solo in chorus! This year could be fun. I don’t care what people think of me now because I won’t let them bring me down. <3 Taylor

Oct 15, 2003- Wyomissing, PA

Hey, I really have decided that school is a big disappointment. It's only cool when you're popular. I'm not. It's only cool when you have a boyfriend. It's cool when everybody likes you. I don't have that. But my extracurricular "life" is what really matters to me. I guess I'm just not good enough for people my own age. Or maybe I'm not bad enough? [peace sign] Taylor Swift XOXO <3

(2003 • 2004 • 2005 • 2006 • 2007 & 2008 • 2009 • 2010 • 2011 • 2012 • 2013 • 2014 • 2015 • 2016 & 2017)

[janaknandini-singh999]

Manmeet headcanons coz yes

( @ezs-diary thanks to you now I can't stop thinking about Girl Krishna™ trope)

She's a punjabi kudi who's literally Geet's twin (OFC?) and has all the iconic romcom movies and dialogues memorized. Despite her bubbly, chaotic side she has a strange calming charm to her when she doesn't even need her sweet honey words to draw people in. Og srk fangirl, loves all genres of music, especially upbeat and lyricals, adores animals, fav season: spring.

Radhya: likes ghazals, lofi music, meera ke bhajan, secretly watches romantic movies (especially tragedies) and cries in her room, Manmeet finds her and Radhya would expect that she'd laugh at her but she'd just kiss her tears away, Radhya would push her away at that but secretly blush so hard, she lives in Manmeet's colony who secretly follows her everywhere, especially on shopping (even for the grocery) "WHAT are YOU doing here?" Radhya takes her to the side on the street, whispering urgently.

"Wouldn't you like me by your side always? Am I not good company?? :(" Manmeet with puppy eyes and sniffs "Ok.. if you don't want me then I will go-"

Radhya catches her wrist, looks away, then at her and sighs "It's- it's not that. It's just-"

Manmeet smiles, twisting her trapped wrist softly and wrapping its fingers around Radhya's and asks in the most innocent voice "Then what is it? Just say it hehe!"

Radhya groans, looks away and scratches her neck "Fine, you're fine."

Manmeet blinks her eyes "I couldn't hear that.. what?"

"I DO LIKE YOU."

Manmeet jumps and shrieks. Radhya going red and holding her down "Shh, what ARE YOU DOING NOW? Everyone will look at you, fool."

"LET THEM! LET THE WORLD KNOW YOU LOVE ME WOOHOOO!," Manmeet gets out of her hold "I am a fool but I'm a fool for YOUUU."

Radhya facepalms, secretly smiling.

At night, Manmeet slips by to kiss her goodnight and Radhya would be tired. She yawns and Manmeet grins "Long day?", coming to her while rubbing something in her palms "Champi time!"

Radhya would get her head and shoulder massaged and yawn again.

"You should sleep."

"Yes, I'm exhausted but I'm unable to fall asleep for some reason." Radhya grumbles and then looks over at Manmeet, smiling faintly "Kuch sunaa do?"

Manmeet beams "KYU NAHI-" clearing her throat. Suddenly, Radhya would settle herself on Manmeet's lap and close her eyes - making Manmeet blush this time before continuing. She'd hum at first building a light, dreamy tune and it'd take everything for Radhya not to dance even though the rhythm was so slow so she'd instead tap her fingers against Manmeet's thighs along with the tune, making Manmeet's breath catch and making it difficult to even begin singing now so she'd take out her flute and start playing it. Within a minute, Radhya stills into a rhythmic composure, her head buried deep and face completely hidden away in Manmeet's lap, snoring lightly. Manmeet smiles at that and kisses her forehead, pulling up the blankets on her and turning off the lights

With Vaidarbhi: loves art and poetry, analyzes controversial cinema and drama and is a sucker for old school romance, comfort movie is Shahid and Amrita's Vivah, writes secret love letters to Manmeet but delivers it herself by saying

"My brother sent this for you."

Manmeet smiles, nodding and opening it "I confess I do have an effect on people but I'm not sure your brother is one of them."

Vaidarbhi nods back, looking at the ground, turning around to leave.

"Vaidu!" Manmeet calls out

Vaidarbhi's heart skips a beat as she turns around in an instant

"Just wanna say that.. never be afraid of anything, sweetheart. I'm always with you." Manmeet winks

On the day she was getting forcibly married, her heart echoed back these words of the love of her life to her and she wrote a final love letter, revealing her true identity at last.

On the mandap just as she was taking the last phera, someone whistles loudly and calles out her name. Vaidarbhi immediately recognizes the voice and makes a run for it. Suddenly, the groom stands up and horror etches itself on Vaidarbhi. But he tears down his disguise to reveal Halveer, Manmeet's brother. "GO! I'LL TAKE CARE OF THEM." as he plunges into the crowd going wild around them.

Manmeet revs the engine of her bike as Vaidarbhi jumps on the seat behind her, crying happily and clutching her waist tightly from behind.

With Parth: he loves sports, Shreya Ghoshal and old Bollywood, meets with Manmeet regularly in the gym.

"Nice to see you here! But Mann.. you don't gym?" Parth shakes his head, his hair wet with sweat swaying in the process

"I come here for you, handsome." Manmeet whispers in his ears and giggles, knocking Parth out of his senses and freezing him as usual.

She pulls his cheeks aggressively and tightens her grip on his shoulder, trickling her hand downwards and squeezing his biceps. "Do pushups."

Parth is merely able to nod and takes his position. Suddenly, Manmeet jumps on him, almost breaking his bone.

"AAAOOOWW" he screams

"Now do it!" Manmeet says as if nothing happened

Parth smiles, suddenly forgetting all about his pain and does as he's ordered. He starts off and keeps on doing it on super speed like a machine. After dizziness strikes through, Manmeet steps up wobbling and smiles nervously, patting his head "Good boy!"

[theartoflovingthomashunt]

Alexandra "Alex" Hunt (nee Spencer)

[All Thomas Hunt x Alex Spencer Masterlists] [All things Alex]

Book: Red Carpet Diaries / Hollywood U Husband: Thomas Hunt Children: Felicity, Vincent, Bogart (dog) Face Claim: Katherine McPhee (RCD FC)

*Alex began as a main character, but has become an original character now It only took almost 5 years to make a character page for her 🙈

What's in a Name?~ Alexandra Rose Spencer

Alexandra

Origin: Greek, feminine form of Alexander, derived from alexein

Meaning: "defender of men"

Why I chose it: I adore the name Alex and all variations of the name. It's one of my favorites which is why I chose it for my pen name... I have a complete unpublished manuscript from several years ago. Maybe one day I'll do something with it, but until then, I decided to give Alex her name because it means something to me

Rose

Origin: Latin

Meaning: rose, a flower

Why I chose it: My grandmother's name was Rose, when she passed I decided to remember her through Alex by giving her Rose as a middle name

Spencer

Origin: English

Meaning: derived from the Old French despensier, a steward

Why I chose it: One of my favorite TV shows of all time is Psych, so I gave her the last name Spencer after Shawn Spencer.

Nicknames: primarily Alex, she did try going by Lexi and Lex when she was in middle school, but decided they weren't for her

The Basics

Birthday: March 6 Zodiac: Pisces Personality: Artistic, Creative, Idealistic, Adaptable, Generous, Empathetic, Romantic, Trusting, Compassionate, Dreamy, Procrastinates, Avoids Conflict, Too Trusting

Hair: Dark Brown, sometimes she highlights it lighter Eyes: Brown Height: 5'8" (based on my FC)

Family + Hometown

Hometown: Pella, Iowa

Parents + Home: Henry and Laura Spencer Henry and Laura were high school sweethearts, but waited to get married until after college. They had one child, Alex. Laura had some complications during her pregnancy and childbirth so her and Henry didn't want to risk another. They were okay with it, because they loved Alex with all they were.

Unfortunately, Henry had a sudden and unexpected heart attack when Alex was 12 and passed away. It was hard for Alex and her mom. Alex turned her pain into her drama and theatre performances. Through the friends she made there, she found an amazing support system.

Laura is a nurse. Henry was an architect.

Education

HWU AU: Hollywood U

RCD AU: Tisch School of the Arts at NYU* *Don't hold me to that, I had a different school in mind, but at Tisch she could have met Olivia who was going to NYU at the same time and CoffeeShopAU!Ellie (if I ever finish it) who grew up in Brooklyn. Tisch would give me a gateway to bring those ladies into my RCD world. Current version of Ellie exists in my HWU universe!

More about Alex

Likes: coffee (particularly iced), doodling, painting (even if she's not the best), quiet moments away from the spotlight, her family, stargazing, mysteries, the ocean, hot baths, reading, movie night

Dislikes: decaf (she suffered through it for the twins, but only for them), the last sip of coffee in a cup, mornings, exercise, humidity, abuse of power, betrayal, traffic, frogs (irrational fear)

Best Friends: Addison Sinclair (HWU/RCD), Chazz Javellana (RCD), Ethan Blake (HWU/RCD), Ellie Shepherd-Ramsey (HWU), Ethan Ramsey (HWU)

Asks, Edits, Art, and more about Alex can be found on her Character Masterlist Page

More to be come...

please let me know if there is something you'd like to know about Alex that I can add!

[lesser-bohemian]

absolutely no pressure at all, but do you think you’ll update your high school sweethearts fic soon? it’s one of my favorites that I think of all the time 💟💟

i hope so! i've been writing very slowly lately, but i promise i'm working on it! aw, thank you so much for saying that, my words being someone favorite is mind blowing and so, so sweet 🫶🫶🫶 here's a little sneak peek:

They work in companionable silence—their knees bumping, hands brushing. Lexi’s writing an essay for their shared English class and Fez is reading something about the Roman Empire. She’s finding it hard to concentrate, though. Her thoughts are still preoccupied by the winter formal. She’s dying to ask Fez to go.

Maybe it’s a silly thing to want, but it would be her first time attending a school dance with a real date, her first taste at the movie version of the high school experience. She can picture it all so perfectly—Fez in a dark suit and her in a dreamy dress, slow dancing to terrible music under a glittering mirror ball. It could be magical, something to write about in her diary, a memory as sweet as peaches, and as quickly bruised with nostalgia. She can’t remember ever seeing Fezco at a dance, though. Is that because he finds it too frivolous and childish? Or is it because he never had anyone to ask either?

[headfullofpresley]

𝐓𝐚𝐦'𝐬 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐬 #𝟏 📚

𝐄𝐥𝐯𝐢𝐬: 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐌𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐲 𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝐉𝐮𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐨

Biloxi, Mississippi, 1955. When a friend of seventeen year old June Juanico invited her along to a concert by a popular young singer, she hesitated, but finally went. The singer, ofcourse, was Elvis Presley and when his eye caught June's, they both got all shook up. So began the most significant of his early relationships - a summer idyll of romance and playful fun that was to be a last stop of innocence on the path to self-destruction. In this clear-eyed, loving, and tender memoir, June gives us Elvis on the verge of mega-stardom, still a country kid with polite manners, a voice that melted hearts, and more sex appeal than anyone could handle.

Oh, to be young and in love... (and now we all let out a dreamy sigh)

If you're looking for a no-shit, no sugar coating, tell it how it is but sweet book about Elvis, this one is definitely it. Because that's exactly the type of person June Juanico is; she's sweet but she doesn't take shit from anyone and tells it how it is. Even to Elvis.

The book is written in almost a diary kind of style, which is accurate because she kept a diary in that time and wrote her moments with Elvis down. It's a love story and a sweet one at that- June does a really good job of taking you right into the '50s. The book only has about 300 pages and 40 chapters, so it's an easy and quick read. And a very fun one!

June dedicates her book to Elvis fans everywhere and Gladys Love Presley, "the greatest fan he ever had".

(A quote of The Prophet, which was given to Elvis by June.)

Peter Guralnick wrote the introduction for this book and he wrote: "There have been lots of books written about Elvis Presley, ofcourse, with probably as many personal memoirs among them as have attached to any other cultural figure or entertainer in history. Some have been spurious, a number seem to have been written out of little more than personal rancor, motivation has ranged from love to money to self-adumbration (never has one man had so many chief advisers). Virtually none have actually been put together by their narrators. That is one of the things that makes June Juanico's book different; it is not simply that she has written a book that is filled with feeling and insight, that conveys an experience with truth and without rancor, about a real, not-mythic Elvis Presley. She has also written (and rewritten) every word herself and in the process produced an account that is as touching in its unadorned honesty as it is refreshing in its feisty and unself-censored voice.

June Juanico's book carries conviction in its very simplicity, but don't be misled by that simplicity. There's a writer, too. And we are getting the benefit not just of her experiences but of her insights as well."

Naturally, the book starts with a prologue- in this case, it's June and her friend Pat driving to New Orleans. June has her mind set on one thing and that is to end things with Elvis. Even Pat cannot persuade her to change her mind- she's engaged to be married to Fabian Taranto and she's going to leave Elvis in the past.

But... more on that later.

The story starts with June telling us a little about her life and her childhood. Her father, who carried Spanish and Native American heritage, was a handsome athlete in high school, where he met June's mother. They got married when her mother was sixteen and after five years, welcomed a boy into the family. Two years later, June came.

Her father wasn't a very fun drunk and when her mother caught him cheating, she threw him out. Even though June wasn't the oldest, she was the only female in the household next to her mother who had to work to provide for her family so June was in charge of cooking and cleaning. That's all she really writes about her childhood and then we move on to 1955, where Elvis comes in the picture.

June was invited to an Elvis show by Glenda, a close friend. June had plans with the guy she was dating at the time so she didn't want to go at first but she eventually agreed.

Their eyes meet a few times from the stage and when Elvis takes a break, he stops June when she comes out of the ladies' room. She's trying to play hard to get, but who is she kidding? When he asks her to show her around town after the show, she agrees. And it's cutest thing ever.

(I highlighted so many things and put so many tabs in this book and I can't share all of them in one post - damn you tumblr! - but they're just the cutest!)

They were out until 6 o'clock in the morning, talking and talking. After that, Elvis called her house, her brother picked up and well... June and Elvis didn't see each other again until 1956 when she went on a trip to Memphis with a few girlfriends (she wanted to go to Florida instead, I'm sure she's glad that didn't happen👀).

The girls hang around Audubon Drive, sooo Elvis and June reunite again. They spend time together and naturally, fall in love. He's open about his feelings with her and she calls him out on his bullshit - because you know, a guy is a guy and they use lines to get what they want. But not Elvis- he means what he says and it doesn't take June long to meet the parents. Vernon doesn't talk much, but Gladys adores June and this is one of my favorite things about the book. Whenever June was over at the house in Memphis, Gladys treated her like a daughter of her own and I really feel like Gladys wanted them to marry and have babies. June was the perfect girl in Gladys' eyes; she could cook, she could clean and she was a nice, normal girl. June called her "Lovie" and Gladys called her "little Satnin"... Oh, my heart. MY HEARTTTT. 😫

(June with the '56 Cadillac Eldorado they picked up in Houston and drove back to Memphis together. Photo taken by Elvis in June's driveway in Biloxi.)

ANYWAYS, the urge to describe every chapter of this book? Big. Very big. But I won't- I'm not that crazy and I won't spill everything. Takes the fun of reading it yourself away.

Elvis blurts out the L word quick. After four days, to be exact. And so does June. They're in love, that kind of young love where you don't want to spend a minute away from each other but June has to go back to Biloxi and they're forced to spend a little time apart. Not very long though because Elvis finds his way to Biloxi and they're together again, along with their friends.

Their group exists out of June, Elvis, Red, Junior, Gene, Arthur Hooten and June's friends Pat and Buddy who quickly become Elvis' friends too. They go deepsea fishing (joined by Vernon and Gladys and a few others), take a trip to New Orleans with just Vernon and Gladys and ugh, they just take every minute they can get together. Which, when it comes to Elvis and June, was almost every minute of the day when they had the chance. Their little dates are the sweetest thing to read about and their little group of friends seem so fun to hang out with (minus June and Pat accidentally walking in on Red having sex with a random girl, woops). The way this is written, it really feels you're there and it gets better when they join Elvis on the Florida tour. They watch the show from the side of the stage, hang backstage, at motels, go on drives, go horseback riding.

Just fun, carefree stuff. And that's exactly how this book and their romance feels- fun and carefree. There's no real heavy stuff written here like in some other Elvis books. And yes, June and Elvis had their little "fights" or an argument now and then, but it never lasted long and June was like "fuck you!". Well, not in those exact words, but she didn't put up with any shit and said whenever something bothered her. Elvis' jealous side is shown in this book too, as well as how fast his mood could turn around- June doesn't seem like the type of person who would be completely "submissive" to him, or any other man, and she never was.

Personally, I love that kind of dynamic in a relationship.

June doesn't describe much about them being intimate other than a make out session that almost went too far in the car and in the pool and Gladys knocking on the door when Elvis was about to... enter.. June, but that's it and that's enough for this story. If she would've described their entire sex life, I think it would've taken away from the sweetness and almost innocent like feel of this book. It's perfectly fine without it.

When the tour was over, June went to visit Elvis in Memphis again with Pat- he was supposed to transfer money to her for the flight, but the money never came and she found out the next day it was because Elvis had that fight at the gas station. Woops! The next day, they were off to Memphis though and June and Nick Adams met. June did not like Nick at all and as The Colonel's spy, he tried to get inbetween her and Elvis a few times, asking her and Pat all kinds of weird ass questions but luckily neither of them fell for it. Elvis wrote it off as nothing when she told him about it and June stayed somewhat.. civilized toward Nick, but she sure made it known she didn't like the sucker at all.

(Nick wore "Hollywood Teeth", a curved thin strip of teeth that slip over your own, as did Elvis. He couldn't eat with them and June would hold onto them sometimes; this is what she decided to do with them during a family dinner and I screamed reading this. June is such a vibe.)

When Elvis had to leave to New York for the Ed Sullivan show, he wanted June to join him but she didn't want to (she still had a worried mother back in Biloxi and couldn't just up and leave to NY). Then Elvis tried to get her to stay behind in Memphis with his parents, but things ended in an argument, with her saying she'd be back when Nick left and Elvis telling her fine, whatevurrrr. Naturally, their argument didn't last long- they apologized to each other, exchanged their 'I love you's' and spend their last bit of time together. This time, it would be their last time together as a couple.

(June and Elvis with Vernon and Gladys on a deepsea fishing trip.)

Elvis and June's phone calls were getting less frequent. He didn't call for her birthday and when she saw a picture of him and a showgirl from Vegas he brought home, let's just say she wasn't very happy. And then another photo surfaced of Elvis and a showgirl and then a few days after Christmas (which he spend with another girl), he called. The conversation was rushed, him wishing her a Happy New Year and I think by then, June had made her decision.

She writes: "I didn't mind sharing Elvis with his fans; that part was easy. I just couldn't share him with other loves. I couldn't spend my life waiting in the wings - and I wouldn't! I had to be not just his number one, but his one and only."

(Telegram sent by Elvis to June, March 18, 1957.)

When June received Elvis' telegram, she was already engaged to Fabian Taranto. She did make the trip to New Orleans though and Elvis' parade was soon rained on when she told the news about her engagement. The next day papers headlined "Elvis buys Graceland!" and she couldn't help but wonder if that was the surprise Elvis was talking about when she got on that train in NOLA, only to jump off minutes later and leave Elvis Presley in the past.

But come on, nobody puts Elvis Presley in the past. (Nobody puts Baby in the corner - ok, kidding)

Pat and June fight, like.. fight fight. They have to be pulled apart by Fabian. Pat takes Elvis' side and thinks June is making a mistake by letting him go and I think it's because Pat didn't wanted the fun to end. Her group of dear friends she always had so much fun with was breaking apart and growing up and there was nothing she could do about it. Pat still visits Graceland at that time and hangs out with the guys and she notices Elvis still has a copy of The Prophet, believing it's still the one June gave him.

When Gladys passed away, June was in the hospital giving birth to her first and only son. Pat and June make up again and their friendship lasted a lifetime. In 1962, June gives birth to a daughter. In 1963, June visits Memphis for a bowling tournament she was in and decides to visit Graceland - they recognize her and let her in, but then she leaves so she can surprise Elvis at the theater he's at.

They hug and they talk and Elvis invites her over to Graceland the next day. She's excited but the next day she hears Elvis is having "personal problems" and wouldn't be able to see her and her bowling team, sending his regards.

But! The universe works in funny little ways. And sometimes real terrible ways- a hurricane devastates the entire coastline of Mississippi in 1969 and Fabian stays behind in Biloxi Bay, while June and her children move in with Fabian's brother, Wally, in Vegas. Who is also friends with... you guessed it, Elvis!

Wally worked at the International and they attended an Elvis show together. I guess Wally was excited about his sister in law being Elvis' ex-girlfriend, because as soon as they got home, he immediately phoned backstage at the International and paged Joe.

Elvis and June talked over the phone. They talk about the hurricane, a little about the past, their children, and June tells him about Buddy's battle with cancer and his passing. It frustrates Elvis, who says: "Damn! Damn! Why is it the good die young, June? Why? Damn! I sure hate hearing that about good old Buddy. I really liked old Buddy,"

Why is it the good die young?

This line tugs at my heartstrings every time I read it. It's a question I am sure we all ask so often and a question that frustrates us and makes us sad, especially when it comes to Elvis.

She asks him what he does to unwind after a show and he tells her he reads. He reads a book someone very special once gave to him, he's read it at least a million times and keeps a copy on him at all times. It's his unwinder. He's talking about The Prophet.

Their phone call ends with telling each other to take care of themselves and them exchanging "I love you's". This time, truly for the last time.

Pat being a flight attendant, the girls don't see each other very often but on the 4th of July in 1977, a party is thrown in her honor. Pat expresses worry about Elvis to June, saying that there was something about Gladys and him being the same age, Elvis not being in the best health and pressing how he was with his premonitions of death. Pat wants to visit Memphis with June to check on him and see if there is a way they can help- they try to plan a trip to Memphis but June is worried Fabian wouldn't be too happy with the news.

She suggests that they'll go to Elvis' show in Biloxi a few months later, but by then it's too late. The concert was planned for September 1977, a month after his passing.

And that's how this book ends. In my opinion, it's a rather.. abrupt end. I expected more from the ending. June talks highly about Elvis and the way she feels about him and about all their moments together, but on the last page, there's a lack of... emotion? I don't doubt that June loves Elvis and that he was her first love, which is the reason why I was like... huh? The end? GIRLY JUANICO, PLS. But that could just be me.

I absolutely adore this book and it's one of my favorites. Like I stated before, it's a very fun and quick read. It's light, there's no extremely heavy topics imo, and I think June intended it to be this way, hence the reason for the ending I think. It's mostly about two young people in love and having as much fun with each other as they can. It's beautiful and heartwarming and June did a really good job at taking you straight into 1956 along with her, Elvis and their friends- it made me want to be there! There is so so SO much more in this book than what I've described, so if you have not read it, I totally recommend to get your hands on this one. It's a gem. A sweet, teeth rottin' gem.

Definitely a 9/10 for me! 💗

(June and Fabian.)

All opinions on this book are mine. If yours are different, that's totally okay too. Want to discuss? Leave a comment or slide into my inbox! I'd love to hear your opinion on this book if you've read it, or if you are planning on reading it. 💌

[gsohb]

Hip-Hop Royalty: Capital Steez

"Dear diary, what a day it's been." - from Free The Robots

Prior to 2023, if you had asked me who Capital Steez was, I honestly would've drawn a blank.

This isn't a note on the ferocious talent of this young man, but more so an admission of how much of an old ass, I actually am.

But sure enough, in 2023, I became familiar with the music of Steez, and needless to say, I haven't stopped listening, since.

STEEZ was born Courtney Everald Dewar Jr. on July 7th, 1993 in Brooklyn, New York (city). He attended the well known Edward R. Murrow High School.

According to his wiki, STEEZ was a happy kid. Always with a smile on his face, he would don a short afro and skinny jeans.

During the late 2000's, STEEZ co-founded the PRO ERA rap collective with childhood friend and fellow rapper Joey Badass.

Have you ever heard of the Beast Coast Movement? Well, it was (and is) a thing.

Beast Coast Movement

Apparently it was a term that STEEZ used to describe the musical conglomerate that was PRO ERA, Flatbush Zombies, and The Underachievers.

Unfortunately, on December 23rd, 2012, Courtney ended his life.

But, I don't want this entire to piece to be about his passing. I would like to discuss his talent and legacy left on hip hop.

Lol! Apparently, he had a sense of humor, too.

His Music

I always know when a song, particularly a rap song is good, because I'll be listening to it, and say, "This is what I'm talking about!"

It's like when you've been looking for a particular brand of butter for months. Yeah, the others are good and get the job done, but THIS kind of butter makes food fun and nutritious.

That's the feeling I got when I first listened to Apex.

First what I love about this video is how fun it is. I appreciate the jovial, fun energy that's only complimented by half serious, half jokey lyrics.

Maybe I'm biased, because this is one of my favorite types of rap styles.

Also, do you hear that beat?

Another one I really enjoy listening to is Free The Robots.

Okay, first of all. THIS VIDEO.

This video definitely is giving me liminal space vibes. Anyone else? No?

I really appreciate how there's different clips, and videos from different sources. Feels like STEEZ was trying to convey a message with all the clips arranged like so.

Now, with the music: I feel hypnotized. Just listening to this makes me feel dreamy, but also really really dreary. You ever seen Requiem For A Dream? | Yeah, that kind of dreamy/dreary.

Which is coincidental, because throughout the song, STEEZ mentions how destructive drugs have been to him personally and the world at large.

Free The Robots

STEEZ also touches on politics, very heavily here, such as 9/11 and certain ways he'd like past presidents to be dealt with. :)

AmeriKKKan Korruption | King Capital

STEEZ posing with left hand over left eye, while draped in a large American flag.

So, there is an album.

Or rather, a mixtape.

Capital STEEZ had released a solo mixtape titled AmeriKKKan Korruption, on April 7th, 2012.

The mixtape contained a total of 14 tracks, although a number of other rappers, producers and PRO ERA members have graciously contributed to its track count.

After his passing, in 2013 there had been an announcement by friend and fellow rapper Joey Badass that a posthumous album, titled King Capital would be released. While a song did come of it (King Steelo), the album King Capital would never actually be released.

On January 2nd, 2018, Joey Badass stated to fans that due to legalities, the album's release would be delayed to later that year.

As of 2024, the project King Capital is still unreleased.

His Legacy

I'm not sure what things would have looked like for STEEZ had he survived throughout the years.

What I will say, is that a talent and voice like he had is desperately needed now. In fact, maybe STEEZ's energy is still alive and well in some other rapper who just may have the talent, but hasn't been tweeted about by XXL.

Maybe we need to begin searching out talented artists, and boosting them up ourselves.

Also, it goes without mentioning, that it was said that STEEZ had been dealing with some emotional battles. I want to say that if you find yourself dealing with emotional, mental issues, getting help doesn't make you weak.

But taking your life doesn't make you weak either. It just means the help you needed didn't arrive on time.

God bless everyone, and long live STEEZ.

[i-eat-lip-gloss]

school is tmrw

kill me

[thorniest-rose]

Just finished sour candy and !!!! As obsessed with it as Eddie is with Steve 🥰 your Steve in this totally gives me Lux Lisbon vibes (from The Virgin Suicides) … Steve would definitely write Eddie’s name on his briefs ❤️

ahhh oh my gosh THANK YOU!!! The reaction has been so lovely, I'm over the moon about it.

Oh my god and I love it made you think of TVS because that was SUCH an inspiration! That kind of dreamy, suburban high school vibe. And Steve being this young object of desire like Lux is. I was even thinking of writing a scene in a future chapter where Steve has been buying heavy metal records, basically all the stuff Eddie likes, to feel closer to him, but then his dad finds them and throws them all away, like Lux's mother does in TVS when she burns them. And Steve's like "no dad please don't" and crying. Ugh I'd love that!!! Omg and Steve 100% writes Eddie's name on his underwear. On his underwear and in his diary and inside the lining of his pillowcase, which he kisses every night before he goes to sleep.

[vamptones]

I realized I haven't properly introduced my wip so here I'm going to try and explain the plot of Canines

(also please don't take this as a summary. I am not good at those yet. this is more like me rambling about my novel)

to get an idea, I've defined Canines as if an Irvine Welsh novel and a gregg araki film had a child, and that child was a gay boy with drug addiction issues.

Canines is set in the US midwest in the late 90's-early 00's. The story develops between the point of view of its three main characters: Kyo, Elijah, and Samuel. a group of guys in their twenties who all come from very different backgrounds in every way possible. But one thing they share is that they all have dead-end jobs, no money, criminal records, terrible friends, and even worse families. Somehow by the grace of god, they generate some type of relationship built in all of the pain they've had to face throughout their lives, and the understanding and comfort they get from each other.

the story opens with Kyo, who's just coming out of an awful relationship and is in a state of no contact with his family. he lives in his best friend's couch, works as a server at Applebees, and spends his little free time smoking pot, eating trash, and rotting in his miserability.

In an attempt to take him out of the eternal cycle of nothing he seems to be trapped in, his friend Su-jin introduces him to some of her old high school friends; Kieran, Zay, Samuel, and Elijah. Su-jin warns him from the beginning, they're awful people. But they're fun to be around for a while.

Elijah and Samuel are in a type of "friends-with-benefit" relationship, which both of them have a pretty different definition of. Elijah has the illusion that Samuel wants him the same way he wants him, he's very dreamy and kinda delusional about their relationship, ignoring all the bad things it is built from. While Samuel is the opposite, he's well-grounded and very aware that they're not good for each other, and that he specifically, is not a good fit for Elijah. But those feelings get overpowered by the complicated terms he is in with his sexuality.

the more Elijah and Samuel start growing apart, thanks to the distance of the latter, the more Kyo gets closer to Elijah. There's a bit of conflict mixed with jealousy. But the three of them end up developing some sort of unspoken polyamorous bond by coming to terms with their feelings.

I know this doesn't sound that interesting a lot but there are a lot of themes discussed in the story: poverty, addiction, family issues and generational trauma, bad relationships, bad friendships, abuse, trauma, crime, disability, and homophobia.

Canines is my baby and I'm at a point in which I'm finally confident of the path I'm going in with it. So expect me to post a lot about it as I'm creating it. This is sort of a diary on how I'm bringing these characters and their story to life. I don't have a lot of people to share this with, so having records of it on my page is helpful to me too. If you read all of this, thank you very much. I hope one day you and I can see it become a full workpiece :)

[declanowo]

31 Days of Horror - Day 9 - Eraserhead

09/10/23

When thinking about how to open my discussion and thoughts on Eraserhead, I feel entirely lost. After finishing the film, I considered writing about it -  tried to plan out a fun opener or what I want to mention, yet my mind was far too scrambled to even venture into doing that. Instead, I went to bed and slept on it, dreaming off the depression I had been caught in throughout the day, and woke up with further thoughts about this movie, not coherent or helpful, hell I would argue they provided nothing of worth, but they were very much there. 

As to not fall behind, I am sitting here writing this discussion, trying to piece together the best way I can express my feelings on this film. 

I guess to start, I want to talk about the director, David Lynch, who needs no introduction. His work is vastly popular and famous for its dreamy qualities as well as the confusing nature of the often dark story. So far, I have watched all of the original Twin Peaks, as well as Fire Walk With Me, and I have read The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer, written by Jennifer Lynch. The show has greatly impacted me, especially Fire Walk With Me, which is a wholly visceral and dark film that has eternally changed me. Similarly, the pilot of the show really hit me too, watching the effects that Laura Palmer's death has on the town hit home for me, and is very realistic to the process of losing a friend in school, the disconnect it creates, the sudden realisations and the loss of hope. I guess I could talk about it all day, but I’m not here to discuss Twin Peaks. 

When I finished Twin Peaks, I made sure to add any of Lynch’s films to my watchlist that were tagged as horror or Mullholand Drive. That brings us to how I came to watch Lynch’s first feature film, Eraserhead from 1977. Of course, I shall not act like I understand this film entirely, most of my misunderstanding comes from the sequence towards the end involving the pencils, but I will get to that. This is merely some early thoughts I have on this infectious film :).

Looking into the core themes is vital to understand this film I feel, everything around the film opens up once it is viewed as a series of anxieties - a waking nightmare that is unable to be erased. These days, this may be the type of horror I find scariest, the kind that forces me into my shell, shrouded in my own anxieties. This, of course, makes it a nightmare to watch, yet this kind of horror also speaks to me like an intimate whisper, it mixes isolation with comfort in a way I don’t think I can entirely explain. As an eighteen year old, I don’t have the fears of becoming a father, yet I have the fears of caring for another being, the fears of meeting new people who mean a lot to those I love, fears of my world growing bleak, and fears of everything suddenly changing for the worst. 

I want to discuss these fears individually and the way they are presented through the film, but before getting into that, I want to talk about Henry as our protagonist. Played by Jack Nance, Henry is carefree, yet ultimately directionless when we first meet him. Excellently, this is demonstrated by the dialogue less opening that sees him walking through the industrial landscapes aimlessly, he appears to be so small in this isolated world, and his current status of work, being that he is on holiday, only pushes this idea further. He is naive, and easy to project oneself onto, especially when viewing him through the lens of being a kind of blank slate to begin with. 

Both the cinematography and sound of this film are amazing, they are both beautiful, eerie and horrific. The sets are dark and dull, perfectly industrial and are portrayed amazingly through the longshots, demonstrating just how baron this world feels, at times it doesn’t even feel like earth. Yet the sound design never lets you entirely bask in how beautifully shot everything is, constantly there are droning noises, be it mechanical or human through the babies screams, there is always something filling our brains. It is rare that the film allows us to sit in silence, and when it does you yearn for the bustle that was crowding your brain before, at least that way it is more difficult to think about what it is we are witnessing. 

The first anxiety I felt really thrown at me was when Henry had to meet Mary’s parents. The second we enter this house, everything feels off and uncomfortable, mimetic of many a first time meeting the family of someone you love (in any capacity). By all accounts, these are people we wish to impress, we can’t bear for them not to adore us, because we are far too deep into our love to even consider upsetting anyone involved. Both parents are uncomfortable to watch, they feel unpredictable and unhappy. The question of course rests in our minds, why? This feeds both into Henry’s anxieties, while also alluding to the films themes of family, the fear of raising and becoming one, because what if it grows into an eternal unhappy dance, watching as the chickens you carve bleed silently, knowing nothing is right, but you can’t quite do anything to change your lot now; you have a child, and there’s no erasing that mistake. 

The fear of parenthood is where I feel the title comes into play, the film. Henry has the child, a poor creature that I love, and can’t remove this mistake. Now he has been born, there is no going back, and whether or not Henry has what it takes to raise this baby, he has to, it is a terrifying feeling, a pit inside your stomach that you will never be good enough, that you can’t cater for someone, and ultimately, the best for them may be death. Although I expected the scene where Henry murders the child, it didn’t make it any easier to watch, given how gross the death is depicted to be. 

One final thing I want to mention for now is the woman in the radiator, who sings the film's tagline to Henry: “In Heaven, Everything is Fine”. The statement, to me, signifies a dream of living without these anxieties, as in Heaven, you will be cut free of these ties. Everyone is happy in Heaven, and the only trial is finally reaching it. Until then, we allow ourselves small glimpses into what heaven might be, and to Henry, Heaven is freedom from responsibility, it is having sexual autonomy over his fantasies, and it is death. Maybe the radiator sequences are what stick with me most as I am sitting and thinking about the film - there is something so peculiar about them, a comforting song that equally makes me want to shed my skin, if that makes sense. 

In conclusion, this film has so much to discuss and think about, but I want to leave it here for now - I don’t think I am ready to go into more detail about the industrial and sexual themes. I guess before finally ending, I want to mention how much I adore the child, a creature a mother could only love, and that I would cherish, although not in the literal sense - I think I would struggle to raise them, but I would give it my best shot! Thank you for the nightmares! My anxieties have never felt closer, and happiness has never felt so distant, as it lays dormant in a dream to one day be reclaimed. 

9/10!

[voltageapps]

Love 365's Back to School Campaign ❤️

It's time to be back at school! Love 365 is hosting 5 different school-related promos!

For more Love 365 and other Voltage game updates, join our Discord server: http://discord.gg/voltageinc

Back to School Sale 1

Started in 9/6 - 9/13 JST

All S1 stories are 200 coins only + the other stories are 100 coins off!

Applicable titles:

After School Affairs

Campus Romance 101

Class Trip Crush

Diary of a Step-Sister

Love's Hella Punk

Back to School Sale 2

Started in 9/13 - 9/20 JST

All S1 stories are 200 coins only + the other stories are 100 coins off!

Applicable titles:

Bad Boys Do It Better

Dreamy Days in West Tokyo

First Love Diaries

Kiss Me on Clover Hill

Our Private Homeroom

FREE Episodes

9/6 - 9/13 & 9/13 - 9/20 JST

5 or 7 episodes on selected main stories are free during the sale!

Revival VIP Event

9/8 - 9/22 JST

The VIP events:

Love 365 High School

After You and Tengoku Get Together

Charity Campaign

Part of the sale's purchase will be used to send kids to go to school via Kiva!