#especially how a lot of people on here don't seem to have any solidarity for artists

[mdrarw]

I feel like a lot of non-artists don't understand how defeated some artists feel when they look at ai art. For some it's because they think that ai art is better than their own, for others it's just the sheer disgust they feel when they look at ai art. AI art has been turned into a joke for many people, but looking at ai art is genuinely demotivating, and atleast for me, really fucking annoying.

And then there are people who'll go on about "oh but midjourney was already taking your art" okay, and? Is it not disgusting how Tumblr was aware of AI taking their artist's art, and instead of trying to implement some rules to stop this, they decide to make money off of it? And no, I will not leave Tumblr, because this has been the best platform for me to post art on, but Tumblr has now consciously decided to ruin that. I mean, where do you even want to go? Twitter's dying, TikTok is a hell scape, deviant art is also doing AI bullshit, and Instagram is just downright ass.

It makes me feel very defeated to think about all this, and I don't think anyone who doesn't know how this feels like should be telling artists that it's "not that bad". Please, for the love of God, shut up.

[intersectionalpraxis]

A lot of what folks have been emphasizing about the BDS movement (which is an acronym for: boycott, divestment, and sanctions) is that it is NOT meant to be a quick or temporary solution -some BDS movements have lasted decades (South Africa being the first example I can think of), and I wanted to talk a little about this here because sustainability is an important element within this as well.

So, the top 3 that were suggested (and seems unanimous by lots of voices on social media) is McDonald's, Disney, and Starbucks, which have many agreed is a GREAT start because these are HUGE multi-billion dollar industries, whose profits margins are astonomical. There were 2 points I wanted to make into this post, and that includes:

When you're boycotting Starbucks, it means you're not purchasing their coffee beans/teas/tea concentrates/iced beverages/etc from stores as well. I listened to a person on tiktok talk about how Starbucks actually receives the most revenue from this, just a reminder for folks that's also included in this long-term BDS movement, ALL products from Starbucks must be boycotted.

Disney products, passes for the parks, Disney plus/etc are all included in this boycott, as I am sure you are aware. Anything Disney is involved in production-wise is as well. People have been talking about boycotting Snow White and the upcoming Marvels, for obvious reasons; this is just ANOTHER reminder to hit them where it hurts financially. Don't attend the shows -if you need to watch them later or even elsewhere (and I'm not suggesting anything specific per-say, but you know what I mean).

McDonald's seems self-explanatory, but finding alternatives to fast food and convenience items is key here as well.

And lastly, as I mentioned, SUSTAINABILITY is so important! Yes, we can always find a new local cafe or a coffee shop we like (or start making our drinks at home/find other convenience products to use), and sure we can find other fast food options while on the go or again, prepare a snack or meal in advance. We also can find other places to watch shows, to go out and find places to have a good time -but please, remember this isn't like 'when the ceasefire happens we go back to Starbs/McD's/Disney.'

It will include lifestyle changes for SO many of us, and there are plenty of other companies on that list (which includes Lo'Real, who owns a TON of makeup lines -so for so many folks, it's going to be something we find what works best for us -the key is not to get overwhelmed with these dozens of subsidiary companies and labels, but to focus on these 3 at first and then go from there).

Just a final reminder: please don't harrass workers at any of these stores/companies. They aren't alighing themselves with their company's values and statements, they're just folks earning money/an income like us and are navigating this shit just as much as we are.

I've been learning a lot from people who do research on BDS movements, and they can be effective, but it is something we must persist with.

Also, if you already have products from any of the brands listed, don't waste them. Use them, and of course go from there. You don't have to feel pressured to throw a hair product or makeup or coffee beans in the trash. This is about what you do AFTER using them up/and find something else hopefully with a brand that doesn't support Israeli apartheid and colonial violence.

Another huge area we must tackle is BIG TECH, especially since a lot of children (but of course this includes EVERY Congolese person) are being used to mine the Cobalt that is used to make laptops, phones, tablets/etc. They are doing this with THEIR BARE HANDS in the heinous of conditions in the Congo, and are paid terribly -every aspect of this 'work' is a form of modern enslavement.

There are ultimately many things we need to do, and there are steps that have been given by so many amazing Creator's talking about these issues, so with as much solidarity as possible --do your research, support brands/companies that stand by people being oppressed by imperial/colonial forces because this doesn't end until we are all safe, and free from violence.

[pico-digital-studios]

👋 ^_^

So, since I can ask you any questions, here’s mine! ^^

Who is your favourite & least favourite character from:

Cartoon

Anime

Video Game

Comic/Manga

Etc

And why? ^^

OMT!Mina: Looks like we got our first question! Considering how obscure our stories seem to be compared to most, I'm honestly quite surprised.

CU!Sonic: Okay, let's see... @btnfstudios asks "Who is your favourite & least favourite character from cartoons, anime, video games, comics, etc., and why?"

OMT!Tails: Since there weren't any tags, I thought we'd take the question first to start things off. Sorry in advance that Antho, Brian and Devy couldn't be here for the question. They had some errands to attend to.

Nitro: That's fine. At least Smol Devy managed to get here!

Smol Devy: Hewwo! ^v^

OMT!Tails: Well, as it happens, aside from me idolising Benjamin, my favourite video game character's gotta be Alex Kidd. I really admire the effort he goes to to ensure his dad's safe from harm.

Nitro: Man, I really admire him for being able to do that, even when I couldn't...

OMT!Tails: (comfortingly) Solidarity, buddy.

Nitro: Anyway, if I was to pick between cartoon characters, I'd say I really admire Fluttershy's gentle and all-loving nature, even in the midst of danger. Trust me, you don't wanna be on the wrong end of her bad temper if she gets into one.

D-Sides Mighty: You know, I really dig Spider-Punk and his refusal to abide by society's perceptions and ideals. Reminds me of how my dimension's refusing to stick to a consistent "canon".

BK!Amy: If it's from my favourite anime, I've gotta go with Tohru Honda. I really enjoyed seeing her know that all bad things have to come to an end someday as well.

CR!Sonia: I don't really see much appeal in the cartoon characters that are solely girly and not much else.

CU!Sonia: Ditto. It's why I admire tomboy female characters from cartoons like Lana Loud, who's less enamoured with dresses and prefers activities the guys get up to like skateboarding.

Nitro: Heh, I remember she looks up to Ronnie-Anne a lot back home.

CU!Sonia: Wait, you used to live in the same town she did?

Nitro: Long story. I'll tell you later, if you'd like.

CU!Sonia: Of course!

CU!Sonic: You know, if a character in any of those media is in a healthy relationship with their loved ones, that's all I need to like for them. That, and good character development, of course.

Mr. Needlemouse: Favourite cartoon character? I am a cartoon character! (smug) What more needs to be said about me?

CR!Sonic: To be fair, you did end up on the list of "Top Worst-Behaved Cartoon Characters" recently.

Mr. NM: That again?! Remind me what I did again?

CR!Sonic: Well, blowing stuff up for the heck of it, you and Beeman being as bad as each other, hello?

EX!Alice: You know, I've really found an admiration for Blue Beetle, in a way. Seeing Batman go out of his way to see if he has what it takes to be a hero is such an honour not a lot of people get to experience.

OMT!Mina: I'd say Sam Sharp's my favourite. Rock and roll!

CR!Sonic: My personal favourite game character to this day? It's gotta be Mario! Dude's just saving the day just outta the goodness of his heart, you know?

Mini Sonic: Hmm, let's see... I'll opt for Green Lantern. I mean, come on! He can build anything just with that ring of his!

Wacky: You know, I've found Tintin to be quite the intrepid adventurer in his comics and film, especially when alongside his dog, Snowy.

Hog: What about Cuphead? Does he count?

Wacky: Well, he started as a video game, not a cartoon, though the similarities are there. Plus, he got his own TV show!

Hog: Cool! Where can I see it?

Wacky: Let's see... Ah, bummer. It's behind a Netflix subscription.

Hog: Hmph! If only there was a way to pirate that so I could watch it.

Nitro: I'm sure Lucia will figure out a way later.

Nine: My favourite in anime's definitely that guy from Fist of the North Star. I mean, he's almost unstoppable with those rapid-fire punches and hitting weak points. Omae wa mou shindeiru!

CR!Manik: I'm... gonna pretend I don't know what that means. Dad has really been getting me and Sonia into Wind in the Willows, one of those older British stop-motion cartoons. I particularly find Mr. Toad really hilarious to watch, haha! Poop-poop! The poetry of motion! What about you, Smol Devy?

Smol Devy: Me really likes Ana and Kat! They awesome ninja fwiends!

Trip: Hehe! Glad you're getting on well with them, little guy. I haven't seen a lot of that media before meeting my Team Sonic, but there's something I found appealing about Gromit, Wallace's dog; he's often the one to save the day when all those inventions Wallace makes either go awry or are vandalised by villains.

OMT!Tails: He really is an admirable character, even if he doesn't talk. And there you have it! Thanks for the question, Brendan!

Footnote

Nitro: Pst! I just wanted to throw in my part for the second half of that question for you, Brendan. For the "least favourite character" concerning cartoons for me, under the Looney Tunes lot, that title's absolutely going to Pepé Le Pew. His whole schtick is absolutely inappropriate by today's standards, and I'm glad I haven't seen him around Toontopia. As Vincent Alexander once put it, "If there's any moral to the cartoons, it's that if you act like Pepé, you stink." Well, thanks for the question, dude!

[22degreehalo]

Also this is Incredibly petty and shitty and dumb but.

So I've been reading more fanfic lately and especially among Gen Z writers (presuming a lot of things here but it tends to line up that way I think) that when part of a m/m ship is canonically in a relationship with a woman, to have her also not have ever been attracted to men/him after they break up.

Which. I get the idea behind it!!! It can feel sexist to force her away just to get your two boys available for one another, and if it's an overall fluffy and lighthearted fic, it makes the whole thing a lot easier to swallow if she also was actually never really into it all along. Plus, there's a general trend to making most of the cast queer these days, and this allows for a quick and easy Queer Woman, so. It just makes sense.

Personally I kinda... have some mixed feelings about it because I think it's perfectly normal? for somebody to have bad feelings after a break-up and maybe be kind of human and hurt and even bitter about it, and I sortaaaa resent almost the implication I feel sometimes that it's more ~feminist and independant~ for a woman to have never had Actual Feelings for the guy. But THEN AGAIN I am simply an angst-liker deep down, SO.

But see the thing is. I expressed above that the woman in question is made as never having been attracted to men after all. But in absolutely every single case that I can remember of this (and there are a lot!), the woman was, very specifically and explicitly, made a lesbian. Not once, in ANY fic I've read, has she been aro/ace.

Even when there's nothing you could so much as hint at in canon of her being into girls. Even when there's not even a real plausible canon possibility for her girlfriend. Even if said girlfriend is entirely imaginary and theoretical, it will ALWAYS be assured to the reader that she definitely, 100% has one (or if not, is going to get one very soon).

which.

On the surface... I do not think there is any actual good reason for that. All the positive aspects I mentioned above would still apply 100% to an aro/ace character. And, like, when the plot itself focuses so strongly on romance between two men? That's the perfect place to bring in an aspec character as contrast!! They'll actually be able to provide a totally outsider view to this all! To me, that seems like the clearest option, diversity-wise?

...but. well. it's not hard to guess why things don't happen that way.

And it's the same sort of reason that Gen Zs are so eager to point out any random female character, no matter how strongly associated with romance with men, as a lesbian. While I have once again never seen such a character randomly labelled aro/ace (except by explicitly aro/ace people who forcibly acknowledge self-consciously that this isn't canon and they're just projecting because they like the idea haha don't worry!!!)

Because lesbian representation is 'more important' than aro/ace representation.

And because women aren't really 'not attracted to men' unless they're attracted to women instead. Otherwise, it's just 'not liking sex.' And that's just not nearly feminist enough, is it? Where's the female solidarity in that?!

[tkblythofficial]

don't know if you're a woc/ specifically a latinx woman but if not i hope other person on this blog is so they could share their thoughts on this but recently I've read some think pieces here on Tumblr of those who support R+J relationship and a lot of them say R being with J is a representation of her embracing and connecting with her identity as a diaspora latina in the US which I think it's kinda bs, because you can be 100% pro latinidad/POC solidarity and still call out an specific problematic behavior that our community is plagued with and it's abuse/grooming.

I've also read how harmful it is for us zeglyths to ship R with a white man because we're disregarding her boyfriend (POC) I think they're trying to compare R situation to India and Corey from QC and Halle Bailey and Jonah in TLM and how "swirling" shipping is racist especially to the woc actress.

1) Do we know something abt R previous bfs? She seems like she don't have a type and it seems like she dated at least 1 white guy before J

2) Her mom married white and her sister is dating a white guy too so idt she's having pressure at home for potentially dating out of her culture also if she dated T or any other white man she still be dating within her race because despite her phenotype R considers herself a white latina, so idk why people are making such fuss??

3) POC men can also be problematic, we can be critical of their personal character without resorting to racism. This might be a bonus but boricua men are notoriously known for being toxic 💀 so J was already on thin ice when I heard he's puerto rican and then the whole 6-7 age gap made me go HELL NO

I’m a WoC but not Latina. The whole “if you date outside your face, you can’t support your own race at the same time” is BS and racist. If Halle B and Jonah dated, Halle B would still be black and can discuss black issues. Same thing with R and T. R would still be Latina no matter how people try to frame it.

And shipping Zeglyth has nothing to do with J for me lol. I want R to dump J but if they break up and she dates someone better (even if it’s not T) I would still be happy for her (no matter their ethnicity or race).

1) No I don’t know but I believe they were either Latino and/or white!

2) it shouldn’t matter! And I don’t think R cares, she just wants someone to make her happy lol regardless of what they look like

3) exactly! Anyone can be toxic. There’s bad people in all races, gender, shapes and sizes.

[anulithots]

Random ask, who are your favorite romantic relationship's couples in any media, like anime/manga, tv series, books, etc (can be canon or non-canon)? Feel free if you want to write the reasons or not of why you love them....

P.s

I'm not the one who asked that fav charas but WOW your answer is great, thanks for sharing them.

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!

I typically like dynamics, romantic or otherwise (if they are canonical, it's just an extra for me, a nice extra but an extra nonetheless.)

BUT I do have my ships, very much so.

Here's a quick list:

Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto

Megumi Fushiguro and Yuji Itadori (queer platonic/semi-romantic, I really just like their dynamic)

Maki and Nobara Kugisaki

Crowley and Aziraphale

@pinetreevillain's Timothy and Donnie

Jesper and Wylan

Kaz and Inej (really all the pairings in Six of Crows are great)

Bo Seon and Kang Dae (I hope I spelled their names right! I don't have easy access to webtoon anymore... sadness)

Daph and Tom (queer platonic) from the Interpretation of Shadows

And just a note! I typically ship with a 'queer platonic flavor' to everyone. This aspec person loves their fluff I guess. (I don't like/don't read smut)

#1 Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto

I've rambled about them... a lot.

Most of my essays are here

Gojo the analyst

SatoSugu and how they support each other

Ao No Sumika - "Will we meet again?"

Gojo and Geto being compliments in an ironic way

Edit with them is here

They are each other's compliments, they are soulmates, they are most comfortable around each other, and they feel like themselves when the other is around. Like... just perfection tbh.

#2 Itadori Yuji and Megumi Fushiguro

I ship them queer platonically/semi-romantically.

But first... THE SATOSUGU PARRALLELS THEY HAVE!!

Second..

Yuji validates Megumi's way of seeing things. Megumi says that he values personality most ('unshakable character') for people he likes, and he canonically likes Itadori's personality and his 'unshakable character'.

They also get to have a calmer version of satosugu moral squabbles. (With Megumi being the one to say that not everyone should be saved, and Itadori trying to save everyone.)

ALSO ITADoRI KNOWING THAT mEGUMI SAVED HIM BECAUSE MEGUMI THINKS THAT ITADORI iS A GOOD PERSON, ONLY FOR ITADORI TO BELIVE HIS ACTIONS (finger eating) HURT OTHERS. (and Megumi's adamant proclamations towards not saving someone who would hurt others in the future... but all the while Megumi is making sure not to tell Itadori because he doesn't want itadori to be sad.)

Also the way Itadori is always giving Fushiguro little compliments, and considers him a friend pretty much immediately.

Also the 'if you die, I'll kill you' 'I guess I can't die then'

Their dynamic is just perfection. PERFECTION I TELL YOU!

#3 Maki Zenin and Nobara Kugisaki

Maki and Nobara feel like they have similar underlying beliefs, values, and personalities. They would definitely hype each other up (especially when Nobara immediately fawns over Maki). Honestly I would love to see more Nobara content in general, and if JJK were a slice of life, it would've been so much fun to have an episode directly devoted to Nobara and Maki.

As it is, they both are self-determined and are selective with who they choose to care about. And as far as anger goes, Nobara seems like someone with a 'wild anger', whereas Maki's anger is more controlled.

Nobara also is sparing in her compliments, doesn't let unessecary emtions get in the way of a mission, is more focused on strategy than the rest of the Tokyo trio, and all she wants is to live her best life. No one's getting in the way of that.

Maki is also going to live her life to the fullest, but in a ~spiteful way~. She doesn't see herself as lesser and will leave relationships behind (see Mai) for the sake of living to her fullest potential.

Basically Maki and Nobara solidarity. They would understand and work well with each other.

#4 Crowley and Aziraphale

I got into a hyperfixation about them (just them, did not have acess to the show so I scoured the internet for clips of them). A lot of my ships have this common theme of 'comfort person'. And... yea.

It's been a bit since I've hyperfixated on them though! I fell out of it a little bit before JJK.

Crowley recognizes the flaws in the system and decided to live in his own human-esque way. This includes Aziraphale. Always.

Aziraphale follows the system and justifies all of his human indulgences with the fundamental goodness of the system. Most comfortable around Crowley.

They are constantly doing little things for each other. THeir own tragic breakup scene was because they wanted to do things for each other. (Aziraphale wanted Crowley to be an angel because he thinks he would be happier. Crowley knows that they would both be happy if they had each other.)

I'm probably missing some things, but yea! They gave me a lot of happy sparkles. (Aziraphale was so excited to hold Crowley's hand it was great)

#5 @pinetreevillain's Timothy and Donnie

(I want this image forever imprinted in my brain.. also hope this doesn't count as a repost... full credit forever to pinetreevillian!)

Again, while I still love rottmnt and it was (and is) my longest running hyperfixation ever... my brain is all JJK right now. So I might have forgotten some things!

For all the love that his brothers give him, none of them give their wholehearted trust to Donnie ("Fixing your fix" and all that jazz). None of them can understand exactly how his brain works - and it's lonely being the only one with a mind that works differently. (Plus it's maddening to not have at least ONE PERSOn that listens to your infodumps... speaking from experience).

The FIRST THING TImothy says to Donnie is "I trust you"

"I love it when you talk"

Someone who understands his science jargon! Somone who he can vent to that isn't his brothers! THE FONTS! FRIENDS! EVERYONE GETS A TRAGIC BREAKUP WHOOPDEDOO! (the bad ending death)

... is there a single ship on this list that isn't 'comfort person + tragic breakup?'

... nope?

.... I guess I have a type.

AND I WRITE THE SAME WAY actually -

THEY ARE LIKE THIS TOO WUT. 'comfort people + tragic breakup'

WELL! YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST! If you want Noorie to like your ship, they better be each other's comfort person and have a tragic breakup scene.

I'm going to skip over the SIx of Crows ships because it's been awhile + I want to talk about the others. BUT THE SIX OF CROWS SHIPS ARE REALLY GOOD

#Iforget - Kang Dae and Bo Seon.

They are so fluffffyyyyyyyy

And they're from the webtoon: to the stars and back. I don't have easy acess to webtoon anymore because of 'they're going to make you gay' (I'm literally lithromantic asexual... being gay isn't going to change anything... also being genderfluid makes everything gay. So there <3)

I HAVEN"T ANALYZED THEM BECAUSE MY BRAIN WAS TOO FOCUSED ON FLUFF (which rarely happens) IT"S SOO FLUFFY AND THEYARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER BECAUSE I PREFER ENJOYING EACH OTHER'S COMPANY TO PINNING AND PRE-CONFESSION NERVOUSNESS (unless you're @justrustandstardust and can make it really funny)

#something or other. Daph and Tom from the interpretation of Shadows.

CANNONICALLY QUEER PLATONIC WHOOODEWONDEROUSDOO!(comfort people comfort people comfort people... not sure if they have a tragic breakup tho)

Daph can't see Tom's shadow and it's a comfort because he isn't bombarded with truths all the time and I remember seeing the author talk about it more but I forgot..... and I still like them A LOT, but I;m also waiting for the comic to progress before I can analyze fully.

For now! We have Daph the silly with a great burden on his shoulders, and Tom who tries to be rational and likes hanging around Daph even thought the sillies can be aggravating (because of aggravating sillies?)

ANYWHO! SORRY FOR THE LATER REPLY! I HONESTLY HAVE A FEW SHIPS THAT I LIKE AND THE REST IS FOUND FAMILY-ESQUE DYNAMICs

and while we're here... Satosugu anyone?

Also Gojo core-

[bisolationist]

I'm so frustrated with that menalez "is solidarity possible between lesbians and bi women" discussion because it acts like the harm is completely one-sided. yeah I know bi women can be homophobic and more privileged but that doesn't mean it's an imagined one-sided problem and all behavior against bi women is fine. After a man that sexually assaulted me started bragging he turned me, everyone took his word for things and lesbians around my campus would passive aggressively 'whisper' things like "eugh it smells like c*m in here" when I walked in the room, or they spray whipped cream in my drinks at a party now while mimicking a dick. Or when I got a girlfriend they shit talked her so much that it made our relationship impossible. Almost more than the assault it made campus unlivable and I had to drop out. And what about the other bi women that see this behavior too, is not just about me. I know this send at least one other woman back in the closet and another into insisting she was a lesbian. Maybe that's cowardly and wrong of her but how can they not see they encourage that with how they act? But they never think this is important lack of solidarity. And is also how many people refuse to even bisexuals have any difficulties or oppression at all. Many say they don't experience homophobia,. Those people are IRL too and in groups and making important choices. GC darling Kathleen Stock was saying not too long ago Bisexuals are only politically relevant when they are in a same-sex relationship. As if our oppression doesn't start before and continue after. I'm sorry for the rant it just makes me sad.

I don't know what discussion you're talking about and frankly I don't want to comment directly on that if it's supposed to be about bi women and lesbians specifically.

I'm so sorry you had to go through that, anon. But I'll say that your story is not at all uncommon. I'm honestly kind of stunned because I've also run into the "ew you're going to smell like fish" (this being a crude and misogynist reference to vaginas ofc) from gay men, so that very much brought back some bad memories. I've mentioned it recently, but there's definitely something very weird about how many bisexual people see harassment from gay/lesbian people go SHARPLY up after they deal with a homophobic/biphobic incident from a heterosexual person, and especially if it's sexual assault. It happened to me after my CSA *and* after my mother cut me off, though in different ways. I've talked to a fair number of bi women that were either turned away from "LGB" support groups after a homophobic crime, or else faced ridicule and harassment there so they ended up feeling worse. The pattern seems to be that here's this logic that since bi women can be attracted to men, that homophobic men assaulting them thus isn't an "LGB" related issue. And before anyone puts words in my mouth none of this is to say that gay people oppress us or that they even could oppress us. But I think there's a lot of people eager to twist the knife when hets do. I still can't wrap my head around why there's so much aggression specifically aimed at people that speak openly about SA or homophobic treatment from heterosexuals. At best I can imagine that these people believe in pushing a certain agenda where bisexuals don't live meaningfully different lives than heterosexuals, and thus it's all right to treat them a certain way? So like they react to bisexuals talking about their oppression as a challenge and as a non-oppressed group trying to claim oppression that isn't theirs? Sorry, I'm rambling and speculating at this point. But yeah I'm really sorry you and so many others I've heard from have had similar incidents. I do wish it was something we could address with more respect and an understanding that even if "oppression" isn't in play it's still an extremely traumatic and harmful reaction that compounds the already difficult feelings of sexual assault while being a sexual minority.

[dipperdesperado]

Hogwarts Legacy and the Limits of Liberal Allyship

Seeing the conversation around Hogwarts Legacy has confirmed my belief that the bandwidth of conventional American politics is so small, and can't encompass literally any action that challenges the status quo.

For those who don't know, Hogwarts Legacy (HL) is an upcoming AAA Western RPG where you play as a created character in the Harry Potter universe. It's gotten a lot of flak due to its ties to JK Rowling (JKR). She still gets money from anything in the Harry Potter IP due to her contract negotiations. The issue with JKR is that she doesn't believe that trans women are women. Due to this, a lot of folks, especially those in trans communities are asking people not to play the game.

The issue comes in when people are not only going to play the game but are loudly playing it. People revel in the fact that there are those who "are mad" that they're playing a game.

But, it's so much more than that. Just because people have such a strong affinity for Harry Potter, they feel like they can't help but play the game. While I've never really engaged with the IP, from what I do know, that shit did not age well in most regards.

The simple fact is, if someone from a community is like, "hey, can you not do this thing that enables people to harm me and people in my community"? Our answer should be yes. There should be no argument. Why is this an issue?

It's an issue because of the prevailing politics of the day. As I mentioned before, this is American-centric, but neoliberalism is worldwide, baby. It affects all of us.

In the liberal conventional thought around social issues, supporting marginalized movements and ideologies is only acceptable within a certain range of actions and contexts. It all ends up being performative, due to a very shallow, mostly aesthetic analysis.

Like, anything that makes them uncomfortable is too far, and any dissent from the community is asking too much.

While liberals see themselves as being more progressive than conservatives, it seems that the extent of their allyship is the yearly rainbow flag logo shit. Both groups inherently uphold the structures that exist (which cause the need for there to be such strong allyship in the first place.)

To bring it back to HL, if people want to play the game, I don't agree with it but like, I'm not gonna smack you over the head. It just proves the point to a great degree when they feel the need to not only buy it (instead of 🏴‍☠️), but to tell these folks that you're going to. They're upset because people don't seem to care about their issues, especially when a lot of LITERALLY genocidal things are happening to trans folks.

The whole thing just feels very scary. How many times do we have to go through historic moments before people start to see the patterns? I really hope that people start understanding that allies don't mean shit. Folks need accomplices.

If you want to know how to help, find those communities in your locality and get involved. Send them some bands, like the amount that you would've spent on the game if you were to buy it. Show up, in real solidarity. We have to protect each other. This kind of shit does not end well for marginalized people in general (bigotry will always try to envelop more and more people). Stay safe, and stand with your community. Here's a link to learn more.

[bubtans]

(same anon) thanks for the reply, I agree with everything. Sadly, given how brown/black women are treated by fandom, I was expecting it to happen, but it still stings.

I'm trying not to be swayed because I also think Alhaitham is an excellent charcater, but between the rampant misogyny of his fans and the yaoists, it's a bit bad around here. The Desert Gang was my favourite part of the Archon Quest, Dehya in particular for many reasons, but she's largely ignored by the fandom which is baffling since she got more screentime than everyone else except Nahida 🥴

i'm so sorry to hear that, my friend, and i hope it doesn't affect you too much so you can keep enjoying desert gang to the fullest :'( i've ranted a lot about how fandoms are in this very weird place where they have a very surface-level understanding of what it means to perceive media in a progressive way, so there's a lot of posturing and tokenizing that happens to women, especially black/brown women, because people just aren't equipped to give those stories the same level of dimension that they are to men's.

(had to rant Some More a little bit below i'm so sorry u don't have to read it but just know I GET U)

like one thing i've noticed is that i don't even think dehya has just been ignored, she and candace have just been watered down into sidepieces or pigeonholed as "sumeru beiguang" because even popular lesbian romance is a collection of tropes that people have taken from their favorite yaoi and reapplied to women.

dehya's very significant relationship with alhaitham is neatly categorized as "mlm/wlw solidarity" so that people can seem like they're diversifying the story and acknowledging dehya without needing any further exploration because the only way a man and a woman can have a meaningful non-romantic bond is if we're somehow still making it about the man's other relationships (kaveh, in this case, because god knows neither candace nor dunyarzad are ever the center of that "solidarity" as dehya's love interests).

people can conveniently claim that alhaitham's underdeveloped, tropey hostility with kaveh is more significant than his deep and enduring respect for dehya's personhood because it's "gayer" based on a surface-level understanding of queerness and race. even though dehya outwardly expressing her frustration to the traveler at how desert-dwellers' bodies and minds are taken for granted, only to then have her intelligence Repeatedly vouched for by alhaitham to the point of wanting her to work with him, is a narrative that already has inherent queer significance even in platonic devotion and love.

everyone has unknowingly created these boundaries to separate stories about gender, queerness, and race respectively, so characters like dehya and alhaitham and candace who combine multiple perspectives at once are just. forced into boxes that don't fit and i'm SAD!!!! I'M ANGY!!!!

[intersectionalpraxis]

Hi! I hope I'm not bothering u but I saw you were responding to asks about the BDS boycott. I'm wondering if you know if it's okay to keep using products we already own from these brands? I'm not trying to be facetious, I've literally never done a boycott before so I genuinely don't know the protocol. My Puma backpack can't datamine me for profit after I buy it but my HP laptop filled with manufacturer bloatware sure can...

Hello!

Not at all, thank you so much for your question.

I've been vegan for nearly 8 years now (I promise this analogy will make sense in a moment), and I had a few leather shoes that I felt would be a waste to throw out (because it would be), and since it was an essential item for me (shoes are also expensive for a lot of us), I kept them until they wore out.

I think it's the bigger picture here, once something wears out and you have to buy a new one, you can absolutely look into brands that support Palestine/overall aren't supporting oppressive regimes. I know that can be difficult, but there are a few brands out there, as well as locally made items, that I'm sure we can look into when we re-purchase items essential to us.

So if you want to donate items you don't want to use/wear, or use it until it wears out or even if it takes a while for that 'wear and tear,' then I'd say that now you know which brands support apartheid and violence, so you can avoid buying them in the future. There are a few brands I had in the past I didn't realize weren't the greatest, so I stopped buying from them entirely (Nike being one of them).

Lap tops, I would say big tech, generally, is something that must be tackled entirely because it is inherently insidious. I'm not a expert on any of this, of course, but my last phone I kept for 8 years because I understand the blood these companies have on their hands to make their products. Same for my computers, unless something happens, my laptops have lasted me 4 to 5 years.

So again, my answer is by no means perfect, but being aware of the ways in which we are complicit in these systems and structures of oppression -and how A LOT of our technology, goods, clothing/etc depend on the deplorable conditions of workers mostly in the Global South, is something we need to go beyond in solidarity with and DEMAND systemic changes because no human being should have to ever suffer just so Alex/etc can get that pretty new iPhone for Christmas, or insert any example here of course.

At the end of the day, capitalism is a corrupt and evil system, and I do believe, especially in these later stages of capitalism, and people all around the world rebelling, and demanding changes will turn the tide in so many ways. Little changes we make can seem micro-level to so many people, but it can be effective if we all make those small steps moving forward.

I hope this offers even a little bit of insight, and once again, thanks for your questions, and take care!

[wild-at-mind]

If you want to know how seriously I am affected by the idea of 'contamination' of good leftists by the prospect of listening to people who disagree with you on some things, or even just having in your life people who kind of suck in some ways, here is an anecdote. So I've been trying to get involved with the local socialist group again after I dropped out after a similar attempt last year, the reason I dropped out being that I could feel the purity element creeping in. A lot of discussion turned into 'Tories are like this and have these characteristcs and also are all evil'....this coming a couple of years after a general election where a number of stalwart Labour voting constituencies went Tory for the first time, for a variety of complex reasons. And yet this seemed to have not permeated the discourse at all. Should it not have??? Personally I think it absolutely should have and I want to be around people who can talk about things in more detail than 'Tories bad, the end!' I'm glad some people find this cathartic but I don't. So I left.

I started attending meetings again this September and things seemed to be going well. We are in a different place in this country and now everyone is predicting strongly that the government will change at the next general election. No one thought much of Keir Starmer but in a constructive way, there wasn't any 'electoral politics is the greatest evil and we must all completely disengage, shun any who still believe in it and possibly become conspiracy theories' type stuff. That's not really the socialists whose meetings I was attending's vibe anyway- their ultimate aim is to put Socialist Party members into government positions but they recognise this is a long way off goal. They focus on talking to people and seeing where they are coming from, rather than talking at them and condemning them, which I agree is kind of the only way to bring enough people around to a cause like this. Once of my favourite leftist bloggers on here who sadly left ages ago once said 'leftism is supposed to be about meeting people where they are'. In one of the discussions at the socialist meetings one member who does a lot of engagement with the public said (paraphrasing): 'you have to approach people humbly, accepting that you don't know everything and open to their point of view even if you disagree'. The message I got was that not everyone can or will value your cause, especially in a very Conservative-voting town like mine, but trying to emphasise your solidarity with people however you can is better than writing everyone off as shitty Tories who could never change (and then having a conspiracy spiral). I was finding the meetings a positive experience but the last meeting wasn't so good and I haven't been back since. There was a speaker who kind of did the thing my dad does where you just monologue about how terrible the world is from a leftist perspective. Just when I thought we were focusing more on solidarity despite difference and looking for the positives socialism can bring in a practical manner. I felt really bad for this one meeting attendee who was attending for the first time. This guy asked the speaker a question and the speaker just took off going on about the same stuff for another 10 minutes. He didn't answer the question at all. It was annoying and also I couldn't help but think the guy who asked the question wouldn't feel encouraged to come again, you know?

Then also one attendee who I vaguely knew from last year revealed that she had been trying to find support gigs for her band but had cancelled one because the person they had been going to support was 'a bad person'. At first I thought maybe this meant they had fascist views or something (gig from a different band got cancelled in one of the live music venues here for that reason and the venue had to apologise profusely for not doing due diligence, as they should). But the attendee didnt elaborate in any way and I realised oh maybe this person is just kind of shitty....like really you would cancel a gig for that? I'm not being like 'haha good luck trying to be in the music industry and living by that principle', I'm objecting to the idea that you yourself are implicated if you play support for a shitty person. That's not an idea I want any part in and while it sounds like a small thing, I deliberately avoid being around people who think like this because it rubs off on me very easily and I spent years unlearning that shit.

I haven't been back for a month, there's a meeting tonight but I'm not going because I don't want to hear rants about the war from these people. At their best they can be great but at their worst they just rant and browbeat at people who they know already agree with what they are saying like my fucking dad. What is to be gained from this??? And I'm thinking I might give some feedback to the organiser on the problems I'm having with this but how on earth could I possibly explain?? :(

[thebibliosphere]

So I'm currently unemployed because I got fired for taking too much sick leave (it was legally sketchy blah blah blah but in the end I just can't work and take care of myself and investigate my mystery health problems at the same time). So I've been spending more time writing!

I really admire your writing and loved Hunger Pangs. I'm looking forward to the poly elements developing and I'm wondering if you have any advice for writing about poly. I've made one of my projects a snarky take on "write what you know" ... Apparently what I know is southern gothic meets Pacific northwest gothic, chronic illness pandemic surrealism, and falling back-asswards into threesomes.

I know this is a very open-ended question and I don't expect an answer, I'm just curious about it if you have the energy. As a writer, trying to write honestly / realistically about polyamory/enm, I'm curious if you have any thoughts on what's different about portraying monogamy or nonmonogamy in books, romance or erotica or otherwise.

I'm trying to read examples but it's hard to find examples that fit the niche I'm looking at. Excuse me if this question is nonsense, it's the cluster headaches.

I'm sorry to hear you've been dealing with all that and solidarity on the cluster headaches. But I'm glad you're finding an outlet through writing! And I hope you're happy with an open-ended ramble in response because oh boy, there's a lot I could talk about and I could probably do a better job of answering this sort of thing with more specific questions, but let's see where we end up.

There's definitely a big difference between writing polyamory/ENM (ethical non-monogamy) and what people often expect from monogamous love stories.

Just even from a purely sales and marketing standpoint, the moment you write anything polyamorous (or even just straight up LGBTQIA+ without the ENM) you're going to get considered closer to being erotica/obscene than hetero romances. It's an unfair bias, but it's one that exists in our society. But also the Amazon algorithm and their shitty, shitty human censors. Especially the ones that work the weekends. (Talking to you, Carlos 🖕.)

So not only do you start out hyper-aware that you're writing something that is highly stigmatized or fetishized (at least I'm hyper-aware) but that you are also writing for a niche market that is starving for positive content because the content that exists is either limited, not what they want, or is problematic in some fashion i.e. highly stigmatized or fetishy. And even then, the wants, desires, and expectations of the community you're writing for are complex and wildly varied and hard to fit into an easy formula.

When writing monogamous love stories, there is a set expectation that’s really hard to fuck up once you know it. X person meets Y. Attraction happens, followed by some sort of minor conflict/resolution. Other plot may happen. A greater catalyst involving personal growth for both parties (hopefully) happens. Follow the equation to its ultimate resolution and achieve Happily Ever After. 

But writing ENM is... a lot more difficult, if only because of the pure scope of possibilities. You could try to follow the same equation and shove three (or more) people into it, but it rarely works well. Usually because if you’re doing it right, you won’t have enough room in a single character arc to allow for enough growth, and if ENM requires anything in abundance, it’s room to grow.

And this post is huge so I’m going to put the rest under a cut :)

There's also a common refrain in certain online polyam/ENM circles that triads and throuples are overrepresented in media and they may be right to some extent. Personally, I believe the issue isn't that triads and throuples are overrepresented, but that there is such minuscule positive rep of ethical non-monogamy in general, that the few tiny instances we have of triads in media make it seem like it's "everywhere" when in actuality, it's still quite rare and the media we do have often veers into Unicorn Hunter fetish porn. Which is its own problematic thing. And just to be clear, I’m not including this part to dissuade you from writing "falling back-asswards into threesomes." If anything, I need more of it and would hook it directly into my brain if I could. I'm just throwing it out there into the void in the hope that someone will take the thought and run with it, lol.

I’d love to see more polyfidelitous rep in fiction, just as much as I’d like to see more relationship anarchy too. More diversity in fiction is always good.

Another thing that differs in writing ENM romance vs conventional monogamy is the feeling like you need to justify yourself. There's a lot of pressure to be as healthy and non-problematic as possible because you are being held to a higher standard of criticism. Both from people from without the ENM communities, and from the people within. Granted, some people don't give a shit and just want to read some fantastic porn (valid) but there are those who will cheerfully read Fifty Shades of Bullshit and call it "spicy" and "romantic," then turn around and call the most tooth-rottingly-sweet-fluff about a queer platonic polycule heresy. That's just the way the world works.

(Pro-tip for author life in general: never read your own reviews; that way madness lies. I glimpsed one the other day that tagged Hunger Pangs as “ethical cheating” and just about had an aneurism.)

And while that feeling of needing to justify yourself comes from a valid place of being excluded from the table of socially accepted norms, it can also be to the detriment of both the story and the subject matter at hand. I've seen some authors bend so far over backward to avoid being problematic in their portrayal of ENM, they end up being problematic for entirely different reasons. Usually because they give such a skewed, rose-tinted perspective of how things work, it ends up coming off as well... a bit culty and obnoxious tbh.

“Look how enlightened we are, freed from the trappings of monogamy and jealousy! We’re all so honest and perfect and happy!”

Yeah, uhu, sure Jan. Except here’s the thing, not all jealousy is bad. How you act on it can be, but jealousy itself is an important tool in the junk drawer that is the range of human emotion. It can clue us in to when we’re feeling sad or neglected, which in turn means we should figure out why we’re feeling those things. Sometimes it’s because brains are just like that and anxiety is a thing. Other times it’s because our needs are actually being neglected and we are in an unhealthy situation we need to remedy. You gotta put the work in to figure it out. Which is the same as any style of relationship, whether it’s mono, polyam or whatever flavor of ENM you subscribe to* And sometimes you just gotta be messy, because that’s how humans are. Being afraid to show that mess makes it a dishonest portrayal, and it also robs you of some great cannon fodder for character development.

Which brings me in a roundabout way to my current pet peeve in how certain writers take monogamous ideals and apply them to ENM, sometimes without even realizing it. The “Find the Right Person and Settle Down” trope.

Often, in this case, ENM or polyamory is treated as a phase. Something you mature out of with age or until you meet “The One(tm).” This is, of course, an attempt to follow the mono style formula expected in most romances. And while it might appeal to many readers, it’s uh, actually quite insulting. 

To give an example, I am currently seeing this a lot in the Witcher fandom. 

Fanon Netflix!Jaskier is everyone's favorite ethical slut until he meets Geralt then woops, wouldn’t you know, he just needed to find The One(tm). Suddenly, all his other sexual and romantic exploits or attractions mean nothing to him. Let's watch as he throws away a core aspect of his personality in favor of a man. 

Yeah... that sure showed those societal norms... 

If I were being generous, I’d say it’s a poor attempt at showing New Relationship Euphoria and how wrapped up people can become in new relationships. But honestly, it’s monogamous bias eking its way in to validate how special and unique the relationship is. Because sometimes people really can’t think of any other way to show how important and valid a relationship is without defining it in terms of exclusivity. Which is a fundamental misunderstanding of how ENM works for a lot of people and invalidates a lot of loving, serious and long-term relationships.

This is not to say that some polyam/poly-leaning people can't be happy in monogamous relationships! I am! (I consider myself ambiamorous. I'm happy with either monogamy or polyamory, it really just depends on the relationship(s) I’m in.) But I also don't regard my relationship with a mono partner as "settling down" or "growing up." It's just a choice I made to be with a person I love, and it's a valid one. Just like choosing to never close yourself off to multiple relationships is valid. And I wish more people realized that, or rather, I wish the people writing these things knew that :P

Anyway, I think I’ve rambled enough. I hope this collection of incoherent thoughts actually makes some sense and might be useful. 

----

*A good resource book that doesn't pull any punches in this regard is Polysecure by Jessica Fern. It's a wonderfully insightful read that explores the messier side of consensual non-monogamy, especially with how it can be affected by trauma or inter-relationship conflicts. But it also shows how to take better steps toward healthy, ethical non-monogamy (a far better job than More Than Two**) and conflict resolution, making it a valuable resource both for someone who is a part of this relationship style***, but also for writers on the outside looking in who might have a very simple or misguided idea of what conflict within polyam/ENM relationships might look like, vs traditional monogamous ones.

** The author of More Than Two has been accused of multiple accounts of abuse within the polyamorous community, with many of his coauthors having spoken out about the gaslighting and emotional and psychological damage they experienced while in a relationship with him. A lot of their stories are documented here: https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/ (warning: it is not light material and deals with issues of abuse, gaslighting, and a whole other plethora of Yikes.) While some people still find More Than Two helpful reading, there are now, thankfully, much, much better resources out there.

*** Some people consider polyam/ENM to be part of their identity or orientation, while others view it as a relationship style.It largely depends on the individual. 

[bondsmagii]

Ngl I’m beyond disturbed at some of the jokes about Ukraine/Russia I’m seeing online rn. People are being murdered and their homes are being destroyed, it’s insane to me how someone outside that situation can laugh at it

in regards to the TikToks/memes/etc, I imagine four probable reasons:

they're young and immature and stupid, and don't know how to deal with a massive global situation that's scary and uncertain, and they deal with it in a tasteless way because they lack the experience and maturity to do anything else. not ideal and certainly not an excuse, but anyone who claims they never made tasteless jokes as a teen is a liar. a vast majority of them will grow up, mature, and develop the empathy and coping skills they need to approach these things with respect and understanding as they get older.

they're young and terrified, and resorting to extremely dark humour to cope. this is a recognised coping mechanism and while it can seem heartless it's just the reaction of somebody bricking themselves who doesn't know how to deal with it because they likely feel stupid for feeling afraid of something that likely won't affect them. again, not a great excuse, but definitely something that's common and says nothing about the person's character, either presently or in the future.

they're young and Terminally Online, and this is what's getting Content, and they do it to fit in. straightforward and pretty dire, but again, something the vast majority of people will grow out of. people mature at different levels. some of them will realise and be mortified later; others will learn from criticism now and be better for it. in this situation it's important not to equate malice to something that can be explained by straightforward stupidity.

the rarest of all: they're an internet edgelord who just likes to revel in people's suffering and genuinely thinks war is funny, because they're unintelligent, lack empathy, and have never had to experience any kind of serious threat like it. it's unreal to them. it's a TV show. they cannot comprehend that these are real people, and in real life, they're probably a huge asshole.

as a general discussion and not directed at you specifically, I find jokes like this to be tasteless as well, and I think it's highly inappropriate. but I'm not going to sweat about it, because there are bigger issues at hand here, and at the end of the day a vast majority of these cases are dumb kids being dumb kids. I did similar shit when I was younger. I grew out of it. the majority of these kids will, too.

I have to admit I find it similarly tasteless that so much attention is being paid to this. a major criticism I saw was people being like "Americans making it all about themselves again!", but in a way, all of this shouting at one another for Doing Social Media Wrong is also another way of making it about yourself. there is a war on, as you said. people are dying, as you said. arguing on the internet -- especially in the form of posts that the people behaving badly aren't even going to see -- is absolutely pointless. donate to funds if you can, and then move on. there is nothing you can do here.

personally I think that this is a case of a lot of young people facing the very first global crisis that they're utterly helpless against. all of the previous huge crises were things that online activism actually assisted with -- awareness was spread, protests were organised, funds were donated to, and solidarity could be found. this is a lot of people's first taste of being absolutely helpless in the face of terrible events completely and utterly beyond their control. posting will not help here. in desperation to feel as though they're doing something, people are just... attacking one another. that's also not going to help anyone.

I say this as somebody who literally grew up in a war zone: take a step back. donate, or spread the donation posts if you can't. then move away. you do not have to monitor this situation 24/7. stay informed, but do other things. and stop getting into internet slapfights. people in war zones benefit from it 0%, and to be honest, in the face of what they're suffering, seeing people getting into a twist over people posting online wrong is so detached from the real world that it's offensive in its own way. people are reacting to a real-life war as though it's fandom drama, and everyone sincerely needs to log off and reassess their priorities.

[chdarling]

Hi, I've sent these two messages to your other profile and after I found out that you answer here, I am really sorry for the inconvenience

I really appreciate your works 🥰.

I've been under the impression that Graham had been really appreciated by the readers, personally I wasn't so starstruck, but he seems nice. I see some important differences between him and Lily so I can't really picture them together. In addition I can't see sparks, they get along but in a friendly way, but of course, that's my personal view.

I would like to express an opionion about the meeting of MBSC. First of all, I have to say that fortunately I've never been the target of any sort of discrimination. So I think that I won't ever be able to fully understand how it feels, I won't be able to fully understand a victim: it isn't something that can be learnt, unless you experience it. What I can do is recognize discrimination, fight it and offer my support to the victim.

For a victim talking to someone who has had similar experiences is healty, so the principle of the MBSC is right. As Lily said, it's also important to open to others who aren't muggleborn, but of course that's a next step (sharing something personal with strangers isn't easy, infact people were less at ease this time).

Now, my opinion, I didn't like the way James and Sirius have been treated, especially James.

Dirk has every right to be angry with him/them because of their prat behavior. But Lily's not right, James did not deserve that, he may deserve shit about being a prat, but that's not what Dirk did, at least for me. He use words like "pureblood ponces" "tried on some muggle clothes". He underlines that they are not just general ponces but pureblood ones, so what, pureblood ponces are worse than others? Or according to him they're like slytherins because they are pureblood who behave like prats? Considering he's victim of discrimination, he should understand when someone acts like a prat to everyone and when someone has a bad judgment or attitude towards a group of people based on prejudice.

[there's a part 2, it is very long, please don't stop here🙏🏻]

PART 2

Everybody there should know the difference, Lily should know that they have never hexed people because they're muggleborn.

I had the vibe they have been treated that way because they're pureblood who acted like prat (so automatically associated with slytherin ones), not because of their past behavior as prats. I found it unfair, considering that is a group of discriminated people who should be against any form of it.

Maybe I interpreted wrong, if I did, my mistake 🙏🏻 and feel free to correct me.

In addition, James and Sirius have been silenced. At the beginning with everyone sharing personal experiences of course they should listen, it's a deep meaninful moment, better to not interfere. But after? Personally I find a bit rude having someone and refuse them the right to speak, it's like they're seen as a piece of furniture.

It's important that they speak, otherwise what's the point of the MBSC and of having them there if they can't? What's the point of it all if they can't express solidarity, offer support, show that they are against that shit, try to help with words and ASK how to help with facts. Natural silence means reflection, imposed silence is a barrier.

I didn't find fair the way they have been treated but I appreciated a lot James' behavior: the difficulty to stay silenced and the shame for his past actions (sign of maturity).

There's a phrase of James which had got me emotional several times “I didn’t realize we were in different communities, per se.”

I can't even express the power of this sentence, it's so natural and simple, but at the same time so meaningful and strong.

I am looking forward James' presence to those meetings, I think it will create some good for them and for himself.

I hope my message was simple to understand, English is not my first language so... I wanted to share an opinion, maybe I have misreaded things, in that case I would really like to have your corrections in order to understand properly.

I'm so involved in your story,

wish you all the best ❤️

Hi there! Thank you so much for your message. Sorry it took me a while to respond to you — I do answer asks on my other blog too, but since I’m almost exclusively on Tumblr mobile and Tumblr mobile divides inboxes up, I sometimes miss things. Side blog regrets 😭

I’m going to put my reply under the cut just for the sake of people’s dashboards…

I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts with me about this scene! It’s a complicated, messy moment in the story, and it’s so rewarding to get to hear different reactions and interpretations. So thank you!

As a general rule, I try not to foist my own interpretations of the scene onto readers beyond what is written on the page (or, you know, computer screen lol). I just provide the story, and you are free to interpret it however you like. :) But, because it’s such an interesting conversation to me, I am going to offer some alternative ways to consider the characters’ actions in that scene.

So, this scene was not written for any one character to be right or wrong in their behavior. Dirk, James, Sirius, Lily...they all have their reasons for acting the way they do.

Dirk, I think, has every reason to be distrustful of James and Sirius. For one thing, he did not agree to James attending that meeting. James wasn’t invited, he invited himself. Dirk grudgingly accepted Sirius’s presence, but had he known James, the boy who hexed him last year, would be attending, he might’ve pushed back more. James’s presence was thrust upon him, and no one handles unpleasant surprises like that very well, least of all a sixteen year old kid who's been bullied. Also, while WE know that James has good intentions, no one else there has any real reason to believe that. Same with Sirius. We know he’s not like his family, but to most students, they only know what they’ve heard about the Blacks and every time Sirius has been kind of a dick to them, including at least one time he used the m-word first year. Is it fair that he’s judged based on his family? No, but to paraphrase something Lily once told James, all the Muggle-born students have to assume the worst until proven otherwise, because the stakes are higher for them and the consequences of being wrong dire.

Dirk was definitely aggressive and unfriendly to James, he both stereotypes and accuses, yes, but I think it’s unfair to expect him to be a good little diplomat in this moment. He doesn't behave at his best, but also, he did not agree to educate James, and he’s probably feeling pretty resentful about being put on the spot with someone he actively dislikes and distrusts (again, for fair reasons).

One of the things I wanted to push back in this scene, with Dirk specifically, was the trope where the marginalized person educates the privileged person about oppression with patience and gentleness and a smile on their face. James and Sirius need to learn, want to learn, but that doesn’t mean they necessarily are owed learning in a way that makes them comfortable. A lot of times the most important part of learning about your own privilege is stewing in discomfort. It’s not pretty stuff, it’s not going to feel nice.

Regarding Lily telling James and Sirius that they should just listen instead of speaking:

A lot of times privileged people come to the spaces of marginalized people and talk over them. They may have the best intentions and they may not even realize they’re doing it, but it changes the dynamics and does not create an environment conducive to learning. It creates a space where the marginalized people feel they have to cater to the feelings of the privileged people, when exactly the opposite is what should be happening. Lily may not always handle it in the most graceful way (they are teens navigating some pretty hefty issues, after all), but that was her intention in suggesting James and Sirius just listen. James’s heart is in the right place, but he absolutely would’ve kept asking questions or offering explanations/defenses for his past actions. That’s not going to help anyone right now. There eventually can be time and space for the learning to go both ways, but James has to build the groundwork of trust and understanding before they can get there. That doesn’t happen in one meeting.

Anyway! All of this is not me telling you that your interpretation is wrong, just some other ways to consider the character’s actions/intentions :)

Much love to you!

[dabilove27]

How Far We've Come

Paring: Dabi x Fem!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Warnings: Angst, Character Death, Smut (female-receiving oral), A Cocky Dabi, Cussing, A lot of Pet Names

Word Count: 7.8K

A/N: This is my contribution to the Smut Pile Apocalypse Collab! If you have the time check out some of the other amazing pieces! Everyone has worked so hard to make some beautiful fics!

Thank you so much to my wife @lady-lunaaa for reading, encouraging, brainstorming, and helping me the whole way from start to finish. I have said it before but I will say it again. You are absolutely amazing and this fic wouldn't exist without you! 💜 Also thank you @/deathcab4daddy (not sure if you want to be tagged) for taking the time to read through and for your advice!

You've seen all those movies, the decaying zombie hoards, the massive explosions that wipe out nations, or an unexpected illness that mysteriously kills off the population. But you had never really expected for any of those apocalyptic things to become true in your own world.  They were just fiction, never something that could actually occur. Yet here you are faced with the reality of a hoard of rotting zombies. Like you have been thrown into one of the many movies or TV shows yourself.

People aren't even sure how it happened, especially in a world full of quirks where this should be somewhat controlled, right? Wrong, whatever caused this zombie apocalypse also seemed to nullify quirks over time. There was so much speculation whether it came into the water supply or passed through the air. But none of that really seems to matter anymore when you are fighting for your life every day.

And as the mass of decaying, walking corpses steps closer and closer to you, it seems like your end is near too. The smell of organs exposed to the air and sun stink up the room.  You can see the blank, milky white eyes of the undead that somehow can still find you even though they can't really see.  You've had a partner, at least—the man who has stood with you during this entire shit show.

He stands close to you, a single rusted knife covered in stagnant blood, not nearly enough even combined with whatever you could find for fighting off the seemingly endless mindless bodies coming your way. He's covered in burn scars and rusted staples that pull at his healthy skin. People used to jab at him for looking like the walking dead before all this went down.  His firepower from before would have solved this problem in an instant. This rotting mob wouldn't have stood a chance.

But instead, it looks like it's the conclusion for the two of you. Memories flash through your mind. A memory of escaping the daily struggle of your mundane life by sharing take-out on your old couch.  Or how his kisses always felt like burning flames against your lips.  Your regular life consisted of trying to numb the pain of the past with alcohol or working endless hours.  Even though you didn’t have a traditional relationship where you could go on public dates, being in a relationship with a well-known villain was worlds better than this. But if you were going to die, at least it was together. Solidarity in times like this seems to help the never-ending dread that the Reaper looming around every corner ready to take you.  Every moment in this new hell had you wished you had more time to develop your romance with him instead of the tragedy that was about to befall you. You wished you had more time with this romance and that it wouldn't end in tragedy. It's hard to believe that there was ever a time when you couldn't stand this man, but even now, that's a fond memory for you.  You would give anything to return to that old bar where the two of you met and relive all of these memories.

It really isn't a surprise that you met Dabi in a dark, run-down bar near Kamino.  No, not the "bar" run by Kurogiri; everyone who lived in this area knew that it was just a setup. This bar is a tiny little hole in the wall with paint chipping off the walls and where the seats were hardly held together anymore, but that didn't really matter to people who lived in this area. You didn't come to this bar for a luxury experience.

The main reason people came to this bar was its location.  It sat deep in a seedy area which meant no police patrolling nearby so you wouldn’t need to look over your shoulder constantly.  Plus, the cheap liquor was enticing enough.

Every Friday night, you were perched on one of the worn-out bar stools as you nursed your gin and tonic.  This was your place to unwind after another hellish week of your mundane job.  It was still early enough in the evening that the bar wasn't thoroughly packed with bodies trying to get their drink.  The music was still soft,  later it would blare whatever song was currently sitting at the top of the Billboard charts. You were able to turn your brain off and listen to other patrons' mindless chatter in the background.  You could just sip your drink, maybe take a shot or two if you felt like, and then head home to pass out.

You relished this little getaway, an oasis in the slums that made up your small world.  The bartender and regular patrons didn't bother you, so you could have your own peace.  But your Eden got interrupted by a cocky, fire-wielding asshole who had set his sights on you.

You didn't stir when said asshole plopped himself down in the barstool next to you with a thump.  It wasn't until the jerk actually spoke to you that you were brought out of your mindless daydreaming.

"Hey, pretty girl, what are you doing in a place like this?"  He said with a smooth tone.  You didn't even have to look at him to know he had an arrogant smirk plastered on his face.

Who the fuck does this asshole think he is? The irritated thought instantly pops into your head.  Anyone who frequented this bar knew you were from around here.  You weren't some soft, delicate flower that wasn't supposed to be "on this side of town."  Preparing yourself by putting on your best "I'm not interested face," you maneuvered your body to face him, ready to tell him off.

Your words caught in your throat as your eyes met his two endless pools of cerulean.  Your gaze shifted to take in the burnt skin clinging onto the shining staples that were rooted in his healthy skin. A familiar black coat spread across his frame that was even more recognizable than those eyes, and the patronizing smile that you wanted to slap off his face. As much as you wanted to throw up your middle finger at him and tell him off, you knew who this was. Hell, everyone knew who this was.

The League of Villains didn't necessarily keep quiet around here. They didn't have to. This is the area where they recruited people to join them. You didn't just flick off and ignore a LOV member. Especially the infamous Dabi, who wasn't really known for his kindness or compassion. More for his ability to burn anyone who defied The League to a crumbling crisp.

But still, who did this asshole think he is? Waltzing in here like he owned it and saddling down into your escape from the world only to tell you that you don't look like you should be here?  Fuck that nonsense, League member or not.

You swallow down a bit of the initial anger as your eyes narrow into a glare at the cocky asshole.  "Thanks but no thanks, I'm not interested in being involved with the League. So if you don't mind going somewhere else to scout, that would be great." You try to say without a tremble in your voice as you wave your hand in a "shoo" motion.

You aren't sure what you expect Dabi to do next., burn down the whole bar you included? Tell you that you have no choice but to join, and you're coming with him? Rip you out of your seat and reprimand you for disrespecting The League? But instead, none of those things happen.  Instead, he does something you don't expect, and his grin grows a little wider as the staples begin to pull more at his healthy flesh.

You can feel your anxiety rising. Get out, get out, get out, this asshole will kill you, leave NOW, your mind is practically sending off every warning signal it can.

Your chest tightens when Dabi lets out a low chuckle. "Oh no, sweetheart, you've got it all wrong."  He says with a dark tone. "I'm not recruiting you for work. My interest in you is personal."  Dabi points at you and then at himself and finishes with an infuriating smirk that seems to be mocking you.  He's moved his hand and placed it on your forearm that was resting on the smooth bar top.

A shiver runs through you as the mismatched textures of his skin and the cool metal of the staples.  You feel your anger bubbling up again.  How dare this jerk think that you will just fall for him like a desperate fangirl.  You are livid at this point, frustration coursing through your veins, fuck the niceties and preservation. He needed to be put in his place.

"I know you think you are some big shot because The League is doing so well right now but fuck off asshole.  I'm not a League groupie that will just kneel down and suck your dick just because you want it." You spit out at him while shrugging off his hand and moving your body to face the way you were initially sitting. Grasping your drink and lifting it to your lips, you try and down what was left so you could leave immediately, any extra moment around Dabi was a moment you didn't want to have.

You were sure Dabi would have given up or at least killed you by now. You can't imagine that he is used to being rejected by women.  He's handsome in a way that doesn't fit with the norm.  He fills in that bad boy check-list like it's his job, which it practically is given his profession.  Again though, Dabi surprises you with his response. He doesn't yell, he doesn't use his quirk, and he doesn't kill you. He lets out another dark chuckle like he's enjoying this and continues the conversation you had tried to cut off.

"I didn't say anything about sucking dick, but if you're offering, who am I to turn down a gift?"  That smooth tone is back as he moves his hand to your hair and runs it through his fingers.

Bewilderment overcomes you, and you can't even stop yourself before you are turned towards him again, glass in your hand, ready to throw what's left of your drink on him.

As if he anticipated the response, Dabi moves quickly and grabs your wrist in a tight grip.  "Now, why would you want to waste what you have left, doll? That's not a very smart choice." His grip tightens a little more around your wrist, and you can feel the staples begin to dig into your skin as he lets out a deep chuckle. He moves your hand back down to the bar but doesn't let go even after your glass has left your hand.  "There we go, good girl.  Now let's talk just a bit." He says sweetly, loosening his grip just a bit, but not enough for you to move your hand.

If looks could kill, Dabi would have died a cruel death by now. You are seething at this point.  But instead, you're stuck there as he continues to do whatever it is that he’s trying to accomplish.  "What were you drinking?  I'll buy you another one and then leave, okay doll?"  He says playfully and with a cunning grin on his face as you mumble out your drink order.  You just want him to leave, and you really hope he plans on keeping his word.

Dabi motions for the bartender's attention, gives your drink order and plops a few bills on the bartop. He still hasn't let go of your wrist, and each and every moment he is even touching you, you can feel your annoyance continuing to build.  You want to ask him if he's done yet and will kindly get the fuck out, but you have a sneaking suspicion that he likes the cat and mouse game, which would just lengthen the amount of time he sticks around.

The bartender finally delivers your drink, and it takes everything in you not to rip your wrist out of his grasp and grab the new glass to pour over Dabi's head.  "Okay, one last question, and then I'll leave."  He drawls out as you put all your focus into the condensation forming on your glass.  You stay silent, waiting for his stupid question so you can move on and never see him again.  Dabi continues with that condesending tone that is starting to cause your head to ache, "How often do you come here? I'd love to see you again."

Your heartbeat picks up, and little shots of adrenaline start to flow through you as you contemplate how to respond. Of course, you don't want this asshole to know when you come here. This is your escape from the world. You never want to even see Dabi again,  but something from this interaction tells you Dabi isn't going to give up easily. So you tell him your regular time that you show up at the bar every Friday.

Dabi squeezes your wrist a little bit before letting out another "Good girl, sounds like a date.  I'll see you then." You never want him to know how those few words send a shiver down your spine. He saunters out of the bar without having a single drink himself. Patrons stare dumbfounded between you and the doorway that Dabi just exited, trying to comprehend what just happened.

You let out an exasperated sigh before leaning your head down into your folded arms.  The bar top isn't necessarily the cleanest of places to lay your head, but it’s pounding and racing with thoughts, and you can't really bring yourself to care right now.  You try to formulate a plan so you won't ever see him. You'll just move your regular day to Saturday instead of Fridays.  But then that stubborn anger flares inside of you again, and you sit up straight, glancing at your newly unwanted drink as the ice slowly melts, lifting the remaining liquid in the cup.  No, I'm not going to let that asshole ruin my spot for me.  He can come around here every Friday, but I'll turn that jerk down a million times. You think a little smugly to yourself.  We will see how the big bad Dabi feels being turned down over and over.  Maybe that will sting his ego.

And so you and Dabi play this game of cat and mouse. He comes every Friday when you are there without fail, buying you a drink, chatting to you with sentences filled with pet names, and planning another "date" each time.  And every time you tell him you aren't interested or to go away, or really anything to try and get that stupid fucking smirk off his face.  But it always remains cemented there as he watches you get fired up.  And what you don't realize is the two of you are getting to know each other.  Dabi adds in little questions, "what's your favorite food, least favorite, what do you do for work?"  And the questions go on and on.  You don't realize your walls coming down as the two of you find similarities in each other.  And if there is one thing anyone who sees these frequent interactions between the two of you can say, it is that Dabi is determined.

You are so used to Dabi's Friday visits that they don't bring headaches anymore, and you realize something more has developed when he doesn't show up one week.  A mixture of feelings rests in you, anxiety, confusion, anger.  You wonder if he's okay, or has he finally given up.  And then anger if he has.  You don't want to admit it, but you miss his company, and you don't even have a number to reach out to him.  You feel a sense of loss in your chest.  How could he just give up?  He's been trying for months!  You think as tears begin to sting for a moment in your eyes.

You leave the bar that night not feeling uplifted or relaxed but sad and angry.  And you aren't necessarily looking forward to returning the week after, but you do come back to your regular spot and hope Dabi will show.  Your heart almost stops in your chest when you see him walk through the entrance of the bar, and before you can contain the words, they tumble out in a frantic sound, "where were you last week?"  You are standing in front of him now, looking up at that little grin he always has on his face whenever you get annoyed with him.  You cross your arms over your chest and exclaim, "Well? I'm waiting."

"Aw, did you miss me, baby girl?"  His poker face never falls, but his grin grows a tiny bit wider as he stares into your fiery eyes.  And without warning, he wraps one of his long arms around you, pulling you into a tight side hug.

A small eep escapes you at the movement, and you move to push him off.  "What the hell are you doing? Answer my question, you jerk!" You practically yell as you push away from him.  He doesn't let go and just pulls you tighter to him, and you find yourself not struggling anymore as you take in the weathered texture of his coat pressed against your arm and the smell of cigarettes on him.  You feel your walls starting to fall entirely, "I was really concerned about you." You let out in a whisper, not really wanting to admit it to him, but you weren't sure how you would feel if something like this happened again.

"Aw, babe, you did miss me."  The delight in his voice makes you shiver a little.  He gestures you over to your regular spot at the bar, and the two of you sit down in the weathered chairs.  He puts a calloused finger under your chin to bring your gaze to his.  You stare into his cerulean depths that you used to hate and find yourself softening a bit.  "I had to do something for The League, but I don't have your number, love.  So I couldn't call and let you know I wouldn't make our date."  His face relaxes a bit as he watches your frown turn into a bit of pout.

"Okay, well fine, I'll give you my number.  But don't just text me randomly, okay?"  You huff as you lay your palm flat and motion for his phone.  Dabi chuckles and shakes his head before handing you the phone without another word.  Lifting the phone, you type your number into the cracked screen and hand it back to him.  "Okay, now text me, so I have yours. " You say, moving to grab your phone to wait for his upcoming text.

"Hmmm, I don't think so, doll,"  Dabi says, taking in your furrowed brow and then relishing in the way you roll your eyes at his taunting.

"Fine, whatever, Dabi.  Just text me next time you can't make it."  You say sourly while searching for the bartender to order your drink.  You don't want Dabi to see the slight sting of hurt in your eyes because he won't give you his.  The rest of the night goes as expected, drinking and talking, and you find yourself laughing more, not realizing how much you truly enjoyed this time with him.

The two of you depart with another hug, this one much shorter than the first, but you find yourself leaning into the warmth that radiates from him instead of wanting to push him off.  As you begin walking down the street home, you feel a buzz in your pocket.  Pulling out your phone, you unlock it to the message from an unknown number.

Unknown Number: Hey babe, see you same time next week - D

A small smile comes to your face as you type a response back.

The following year you grow in your relationship with Dabi.  There are never really any titles between the two of you.  Just that the two of you are together.  You never meet The League. Dabi is insistent you aren't involved with them in case things go awry.  But you spend a lot of time together when work or villain work doesn't take up the time.

Your relationship together comes to a head at the very start of the apocalypse.  The two of you sit snuggled together on your worn-out couch watching the news as a young reporter stands in front of a local research building in town and goes through the facts of citizens becoming "mindless and violent in a matter of hours."  And how they have people under lockdown who are experiencing symptoms of this "mysterious illness."

A slight shiver goes through you as the reporter goes on.  "That's really scary. No one knows what's causing it,"  you reflect aloud while you lean in closer into Dabi's outstretched arm that is resting around your shoulders.

"Aw, babe, don't be scared.  Those mindless fools wouldn't stand a chance if they tried to lay a hand on you while I'm there,"  Dabi says with a glint of amusement in his voice.  He always sounds so condescending, but you know it's the truth.  Remembering a time at the bar when a guy wouldn't take no for an answer-not that Dabi really followed that either- but Dabi didn't hesitate to let the guy know you were already taken.  He flirts and likes to jab a lot, but there’s a complete shift in the atmosphere when he's serious.

"Ugh, Dabi, you know I don't mean them attacking us. It's whatever is causing it that worries me. What happens if one of us gets it?  There's no cure right now,"  You say and worry your lower lip between your teeth.

Dabi picks up on your anxious state, and his cocky facade fades.  He pulls you on his lap so that you are fully facing him with legs pressed on either side of his.  Dabi holds one large hand on your waist, and the other he presses to your cheek.  Leaning your cheek further into his hand, Dabi moves his thumb to trace over the slight marks in your lip where your teeth were just placed.  "Hey, listen to me, nothing is going to happen, okay?  I won't let any of these maniacs hurt you, and we won't catch whatever they have,"  Dabi says tenderly as he gives you a small smile.

It's nice to see him like this- when his mask of superiority disappears, and he's focused on encouraging you.  It doesn't happen often because you like to keep walls.  Comfort from Dabi doesn’t need to happen often but you can’t say you don’t like it when he does.  You enjoy these softer moments with him that only you get to see.

You pull Dabi into a light kiss.  The gentle pressure of his mismatched lips fit seamlessly against yours.  You pull away after a moment to look into his deep blue eyes that now captivate you.  Dabi has that coy smile still on his face, and as his eyes meet your in that moment, it's like the horrible events of the world aren't happening anymore.  All that seems to exist is the two of you, not the TV still prattling in the background or even the noises outside your city window.

Dabi lightly caresses your cheek down to the length of your neck and finally ending near where your collarbones sit.  Everywhere he touches leaves behind a trail of goosebumps on your skin.  Even with these simple touches, you can feel yourself starting moving against him, trying to create a bit of friction.  Dabi knew how easily he could rile you up with simple touches.  It was frustrating at times, and you wished you could have the same effect on him.

"I love you, babe.  And no matter what, I won't let anything hurt you,"  Dabi tells you, and you swear his voice seems to be cracking, but the moment is gone before you can think about it.  Dabi lives on being mysterious most of the time, and you rarely get to see this vulnerable side of him.  Even if he doesn't say it behind that mask of cockiness, you can feel that there is fear of what's happening right now.  Or at least that's what you think the fear is from, but Dabi will never admit the fear is from losing you to whatever this is.  He isn't sure he could survive this hell of a life he's been given without you.

Your heart aches at his sincere words from earlier, and you whisper back, "I love you too, Dabi."  Drawing him into a more intense kiss.  Dabi begins to run his fingers along the hem of your t-shirt and delicately brushes the skin right under with his fingertips.  You feel a moan bubble up inside of you, but his mouth moving against yours swallows the sound.

"I want you so bad, doll.  Let's just forget what's going on right now, let the world fall away,"  he says in a husky voice after breaking away from the kiss.

You nod to him before letting out a content sigh and letting your eyes fall shut while Dabi continues to trace his hands over your body.  Dabi trails his massive heated hands under the thin shirt you are wearing and down to your hips.  You can feel the bulge of his cock through his jeans as it begins to press against your clothed core.

Opening your eyes, you meet Dabi's half-lidded lustful eyes and bite your bottom lip and allow yourself to give into Dabi taking over you.

You can feel your heart beating a little faster, watching Dabi drink in every ounce of you.  Dabi is one of the only men you have ever trusted like this.  To have you so totally vulnerable.  It's strange how someone you didn't want anything to do with for months has become someone you rely on for everything- love, comfort, pleasure.

Dabi places open-mouthed kisses along your neck that leave you breathless.  "Fuck, I'm obsessed with every inch of you,"  Dabi growls out before returning to kissing and sucking your neck and exposed collar bone.

You grip Dabi's shoulder to ground you back from floating away into complete bliss and tip your head out to give him more access to your neck.  Dabi's mouth is like a flame that licks at your sensitive skin as he continues to trail his mouth all over.  You could be trapped in this pleasure forever.

Dabi grasps the back of your head and roughly brings your lips back to his.  With your mouths slotted against each other, you moan as Dabi finesses you to where you are lying on your back on the old couch, and he is hovering over you.

You break the kiss to quickly pull off his jacket and expose Dabi's scarred arms.  And just as you have only trusted Dabi fully with yourself, he has done the same.  Of course, the two of you have had sex with other people, mostly with lights off clothing still left on to hide the imperfections.  But with each other, there is no more hiding.

Heat begins to pool in your belly as you watch Dabi pull off your shorts and slide his warm hands all the way back up your leg and massage the plush skin of your thighs.  Once your shorts are removed, Dabi brings himself back to your face and, with a lustful sigh, traces kisses on your jaw and neck.

"Just relax and let me take you away from all of this, love.  I want to hear every sound you make." He growls as he moves down towards your pussy and lays himself between your spread legs.  Dabi lifts your thighs to rest on his shoulder as you let out a little gasp.  You can feel the excitement and heat rising in you.

Dabi kisses down the inside of your soft thighs and stops to suck at certain spots, leaving minor marks in their place.  He stops for a moment until you are looking directly into his captivating gaze, and then he licks a stripe up your pussy over the cotton of your underwear.  You let out a breathy moan at the sensation.   That jerk knows precisely what he's doing.

Dabi then grabs the thin material of your underwear and rips them away from your body with a tear. Groaning, you are about to curse at him for ruining another pair but are cut short when he sleekly licks up your folds. A delicate, playful moan leaves your separated lips.  Your eyes close, and you cling onto his white shirt to ground yourself.

"Baby girl, you're soaking wet," Dabi teases as if you weren't aware but cuts off any retort again with a quick suck to your aching clit. You can't hold back the loud moan that bubbles up in your throat.

Dabi smiles against your lower lips and continues his ministrations.   His mouth is open wide, so he can move back and forth from quickly licking up and down your sensitive pussy as well as suck softly on your clit.   You feel light-headed at the extended sensations, little whimpers and moans falling through your lips.  Dabi has always been able to leave you speechless with just his mouth.

"Dabi please," Your breathing hitches, and you moan out as he flicks his tongue repeatedly over your small bud. You can feel that hot pressure building in your stomach as Dabi continues. He laps at you like you are holding the only source of liquid left in this world, his tongue working wonders on your dripping hole.

Dabi pulls back and looks up at you as you eagerly meet his blue eyes, begging him to continue.  He smirks before lowering his mouth back down and laps at your sopping core teasingly.  Fucking bastard.  Always a tease from day one.

Dabi licks his lips before returning to eating you out even faster as a series of cries and obscenities continue to fall out of your mouth.  You can't hold them back.  His mouth is so hot and wet against your core.

With another curse, you tell him you are close. A sigh escapes your lips, and your head tosses back onto the cushy arm of the couch.  Dabi pulls away but inserts two fingers inside of you in place of his mouth.

"Fuck, sweetheart, as much as I want to hear you beg and plead for me,  I want to taste you right now."  Dabi lets out with a rough voice filled with desire.  You whimper as he continues to fuck you with his fingers.  He smirks at your blissed-out face and then returns his mouth to your pussy.  His tongue flicks over your clit repeatedly as whines and cries continue to be let out of your mouth.  Back arching, you bite at your lip, barely able to even process the words that came out of Dabi just a moment ago.

"Oh, fuck, Dabi, please. Please, I'm gonna cum soon." The words fall from your lips, and your mind feels numb to everything except the feeling of Dabi's tongue on your pussy.

Dabi grunts and gives another hard suck to your clit before pulling away just a bit.  "Hell yeah, babe, come all over my face."

Your eyes roll back, and your mouth opens with another cry as your legs begin to tremble as the tension starts to rise in your stomach. One more lick, and you know you'd come. Dabi's continued suckling of your clit sends you careening over the edge. Your cries fill the room, and your back arches as your legs try to squeeze around his head.  Dabi continues to suck and lick as you orgasm.  Panting and with your eyes twisted shut, you cling to his shirt as you start to come down.  A final curse gently leaves your mouth as you wait for your legs to stop shaking.  Dabi takes one last long slow lick before sitting back and wiping his face with the back of his hand.  You can't bring yourself to move from the couch, still panting and weak.

Your mind starts slowly coming back to you as the bliss begins to leave.  The realization of everything happening in the world washes over you.  But you were thankful Dabi took the time to distract you from the horrors of what's going on.  You move over so Dabi can cuddle with you on the couch.  It isn't much room, but it feels good to be this close with him, wrapped in each other's arms.  You both slowly start to drift off to sleep, but you don't miss Dabi's final words mumbled into your hair, "I'll never let anything happen to you."

Shortly after that, the world seems to descend into madness.  The illness grows more and more rampant.  People are getting infected every day.  Whether it's through the original source of contamination or by those contaminated biting or scratching someone.  Panic spreads throughout the country.  But through all of it, you and Dabi stick together.

From the moment it was declared an emergency Dabi was banging at your door, insisting the two of you find somewhere safer than your run-down apartment.  Because while the two of you needed sleep, whatever these things are could go non-stop, and your apartment was not fortified.

You and Dabi lost your quirks a month after the emergency declaration, along with the rest of the population. People couldn't fight these zombie-like creatures off anymore.  Like all the movies and TV shows, the bodies became more zombies than actual living people.

After a while of jumping around from a destroyed place to another, the two of you found yourself in an apartment building that had a sturdy enough entrance that the zombies couldn't break through.  The daily struggles were still hard, though. Finding food and water to survive became a daily task for the two of you.  Through all of this, he never left your side. He always insisted the two of you stay together.  And so you did.  Fighting the living dead, but sometimes the living too when things got even more terrible, and scavenging was your everyday routine now.

You lost track of time and could only follow when the seasons changed.  But Dabi was really the only thing getting you through this.  Seeing people destroy one another for food or shelter destroyed you inside.  Never knowing if these zombies you were killing were someone you had known at one point, or just another faceless dead person tore at every corner of your brain.  Dabi stayed strong for the two of you.  Holding you every night on the ripped blankets, you could gather for the strange bed the two of you slept in.  You would sob into his muscled chest about how you couldn't live in this world anymore, how you couldn't kill another person, alive or dead.

But Dabi would never let go.  He would hold you close and let your never-ending tears stain the only shirt he had now.  He would rub your back with his warm hands; even though his rusting staples would catch on your shirt and rip from his skin, he still did it.  He would hold you until you fell asleep, whispering how strong you were and how he could never do this without you.  And after all the tears, you were thankful too.  Because without him, you'd be dead or alone.  You knew that without Dabi, you would have never survived this long.

But you could see Dabi was hurting too.  You couldn't find supplies to treat his decaying skin.  He hid his daily pain from you, but when Dabi thought you weren't looking or listening, he would hiss at the pain of another staple pulling at his burnt skin or let out a huge sigh when he would try to put it back together, but it wouldn't cooperate.

The only hope the two of you held onto was each other and that possibly a cure would come soon.  Not that either you could really access that information with no electricity; there wasn't any way to get information other than hearsay.  You survived the best you could in this world.

And as much as this wasn't what you would have picked for either of you, at least you had each other.  You tried not to think of a time when you wouldn't be together, even though the chances of that happening were high- it hurt too much. To survive in this world without Dabi would be too fucking much.

It's almost as if fate chose to play a cruel game with the two of you.  It seemed like a "normal" trip out to scavenge for food and water.  The two of you had to expand your search area since places closer were mainly empty.

This time you found yourself outside of a convenience store, a reasonable distance away from your home.  It hadn't been completely destroyed by some miracle and was not overrun by the zombified people.  Still, in a state of decay, though, Dabi was quickly able to kick his heavy boots through the door and get the two of you in.

Sauntering through the gas station, you quickly begin to pick up canned food and stale bags of chips and shove them in your worn backpack.  Dabi is doing the same on other aisles until he lets out a chuckle.  "Hey babe, look what I found."  He says with a cocky voice holding up a few boxes of wrapped condoms above the aisle for you to see.

You roll your eyes.  "Thanks, Dabi. Is sex really what we want to be thinking about right now? Let's just get this shit and get out."  You let out with an annoyed huff and continue to push the limits of how much your bag can hold.

Dabi comes over to your aisle and snakes his arms around your waist with your back pressed to his chest.  He places his chin on your shoulder and whispers in your ear.  "Yes, all I can think about is getting your beautiful body back home and finally being able to finish in you, and with these, I can."  He lets out a dark chuckle as he pulls you closer against him and bucks  his hips playfully.

"Okay, horn dog, let's get this shit done, and then we can do whatever you want back home."  You let out with an eye roll.  It's hard to stay mad at him. You know he's trying to keep things light for you, to keep you happy because he can see how hard this is.  And his regular teasing is one way he knows will bring a smile to your face.

As you are finishing up trying to take inventory of anything else in the store that you can take back, you spot the clear plastic that holds the cartons of cigarettes behind the cashier counter.  While you didn't necessarily want Dabi smoking, you knew he missed the vice. Cigarettes were just as hard to find as medicine in this new world.  Smiling to yourself, you move behind the counter and reach for the plastic flap to lift it up.

As you try to lift the latch, it doesn't budge. You look around for what might be blocking it before seeing the tiny silver keyhole to one side of the compartment.  Crap, of course, it's locked.    You really wanted to surprise Dabi with this.  Maybe you still could. The key had to be here somewhere, right? You think while scanning around the counter.  You try searching through the counters for a hidden key but no luck.  Letting out a heavy sigh, you call Dabi over.

Dabi wanders over to your annoyed face and can't help but smile at your slight pout.  "I wanted to surprise you! But I can't open it. Can you get it, please?"  It comes out almost like a whine as you gesture to the cigarettes.

Dabi's smirk turns into a genuine smile, and he pats the top of your head before saying, "My sweet doll.  Thank you for thinking of me. Let me help you out."  You could smack him, but instead, you watch as he hastily rips the plastic covering away and slips his hand below it to grab one of the wrapped cartons.

At that moment, everything changes.  The fun times the two of you were having shatters as a loud alarm rings through the store.  Panic floods your system as you stare at Dabi wide-eyed.  "There is no electricity. What's happening? There shouldn't be an alarm."  Horror is laced in your voice as words spill out of you.  Every walking corpse within miles will be here soon with the sound.

"Fuck, must have had a battery attachment. Come on, let's go."  Dabi's usual playfulness is gone as he abandons the cigarettes and grabs your hand.  He's grave now.  Getting the two of you out of here safely is his only goal.

You follow Dabi quickly, a hand grasped tightly in his as he runs towards the broken-down front door.   And that's when even more terror settles into you.  Zombies are pushing their way through the open door.  Their rotting bodies and white eyes focused on the area where the alarm is coming from.  There weren't many around when you broke in, but now it seems like they are multiplying by the moment.

"Fuck fuck fuck." Dabi curses under his breath, quickly turning around and pulling you towards the building's back exit.  You follow behind adrenaline surging through your veins fueled by your flight response.  Dabi grasps at the metal handle to the back door and shakes it only to find it locked.  "Damnit!"  he shouts before kicking the door violently.

Your heart is pounding, and you feel helpless as you stare at Dabi while he continues to slam himself at the door.  While the front door was glass and flimsier, this door was only budging slightly.  With all your focus on the door, you don't notice the continuously growing herd filtering into the gas station.  Not until you feel one brush against your shoulder.

Your eyes widen as you feel a scream bubbling in your throat.  This is it.   This is where the two of you die and either become fodder for a herd of living dead or turn into one yourself.   Your brain is pure panic as thoughts fly through faster than you can catch them.  You don't even realize you have screamed out Dabi's name until you see his face turn towards yours.

His typically blue eyes are almost entirely covered by his dark pupils as he takes in the monstrosities behind you.  But unlike you, he doesn't hesitate. He pulls out a knife he keeps in one of his pockets and slams it into the decaying skull of the zombie that is right behind you.  Splurts of dark blood hit your cheek as he pulls out the knife, and the creature behind you crumples to the floor.

"Keep trying the door! I'll keep them off you."  Dabi shouts, pulling you into the spot he previously stood.  Your heartbeat is so loud you can feel it in your head, and you can't even make a coherent response as you begin to slam your body against the solid surface.  You can feel it give a little more with each push of your body, and everything in you is screaming not to give up.  Doing your best not to glance at Dabi's grunting and movements as he continues to try and put down zombie after zombie.

You can't give up; this can't be the end . Desperately your brain is screaming as you continue to feel the door give more and more.  Your shoulder hurts from the continued impact, but you aren't letting it slow you down.  You can feel it; it's almost there.

Suddenly the door gives, and you can see the sun shining through on the other side.  You cry out in  relief and turn back to tell Dabi to come with you.  But as your eyes meet, fear fills every ounce of you.

He's still fighting them off, but there is a gaping bite wound on his right arm— rows of teeth marks embedded in his skin.  You feel like you're going to be sick. There is no coming back from this; there's no known cure.  At any point within the next twenty-four hours, he would be another one of the walking dead, no sense, no logic, and looking to consume others. This can't be happening, this can't be happening.  Your heart is sinking with every second that ticks by.

"What the fuck are you waiting for? Get out! Get out!"  Dabi screams at you as he embeds his knife in another zombie.

"No, no, I can't leave without you!  I-we can find something.  I'll find something, please! Come on, Dabi, I can't do this without you!"  You are sobbing now, hot tears streaming through the dirt and blood mixed on your face.  An ache in your heart starts to form.  You know you don't know how to help him, but you'll do anything to not leave him behind.

Dabi lets out a grin despite the feral dead people closing in on him.  And gives you a wink before saying in a voice that seems too calm for the situation, "Come on, doll, you are the most intelligent person I know.  You have to go.  Live for us, babe.  Look at how far we've come.  Go show this world that it won't ever break you down. I love you, and I'll come to find you wherever you are in the afterlife and annoy the shit out of you.  Now go!"

It's like your heart is being ripped into a thousand pieces. Your breath comes out in short huffs, moving towards hyperventilating.  You want to go back to Dabi and cling on for dear life, but you won't let him die in vain.  Not after that speech.  That would be an insult to everything the two of you have overcome.  So with all your strength, you give your lover, the man who has come so far with you, the last look before letting out a final "I love you too" and burst out the door.

You don't look back, aching feet propelling you forward as tears continue to stream and fall off your face.  When you first met Dabi, you would have never thought you'd miss him.  But you will , you'll miss every snarky comment, every flirty glance, and the tender way only he has loved you.  The man that you were sure was just some asshole trying to get laid became the love of your life and sacrificed himself so you could live.  And you could never let that go to waste.

[tuiyla]

No, not an anti Blaine place, not at all! Kurt and Adam's downton abbey scene just screamed soulmates to me ;) I like Blaine just fine, I like him and Kurt equally I think, I just always thought Kurt had more chemistry with Adam, seemed to have more fun with Adam, seemed more relaxed around Adam. Kurt/Adam just clicked for me. I thought Blaine had more chemistry with Sam than he did with Kurt and I'm not even one to ship a non canon couple or ship a gay guy with who for all we know is a straight guy. I thought Santana teased Adam so much because she liked him. I could see them chilling at the new york apartment, little digs back and forth but all in good nature. I think I saw the friend chemistry between Santana and Adam that I didn't see between Santana and Blaine. Again, I like Blaine! I just saw him having more chemistry with people other than Kurt and Santana, like Sam or Tina or Artie. I think it all comes down to chemistry for me. So no I don't have essay length thoughts and proof and whatnot for my hill dying haha I only know how those characters and relationships felt to me.

Ah gotcha that's all fair, didn't mean to accuse you Anon haha. I've had an intense Kadam anon before but this is all good.

I always find it interesting when people get attached to smaller characters and relationships - in the best way, because I think seeing the potential in that is so endearing. You make me wish we saw more of Adam so it could have been better for you haha.

Here's the thing about Santana and Adam for me, that I do happen to think she didn't mind him and even maybe liked him. Especially when the other new person she met in New York was Brody, it's really easy to be better by comparison. I just don't think there's a lot in canon to substantiate that? She speaks to him directly like, twice, and only once does she address him iirc. To be clear, I'm with you that they could have been pals, I just don't think they overlapped in the loft for long enough for that to be the canon case. Of course like you say it's about what we vibe with chemistry-wise and potential and I totally get that, something not being canon doesn't mean much in this (post-)postmodern world. And I'm nothing if not a hoe for any and all Santana friendships.

And that said, I do feel like the Blaine and Santana dynamic is lacking. It always just felt like the friendship with the least of anything within the Klaine-Brittana quartet. The canon stuff I can think of, while not all that negative is still the two of them being at least lowkey annoyed at each other. Idk, like you I like Blaine just fine and again, Santana friendships hoe. I just felt like they might be more wlw-mlm hostility rather than solidarity lol. In a lighthearted way, of course. They don't have beef, they're just the least tight bond in the Klaine-Brittana quartet. I think both Santana and Brittany have sweet friendships with Kurt and the Sunshine Twins were rather lowkey in season 4 but at least there's an actual dynamic there. I guess I just wanted more of Blaine and Santana to be able to say what their relationship would be like. We can ponder and HC, though.

I really appreciated this Anon, both tone-wise and honestly just how straight up it is. You don't need to write essays to justify your interests! That's your reading and that's more than enough. Sometimes it's really just the chemistry between characters. We're all just drawn to different things and the way you explained it to me was really cool, so thanks for that. Cheers to Adam!