#even though what i need to do is let myself rest. but i am so tense if trued to bend at the waist i think i would snap clean in two.

[mylifesjustacarousel]

hook’s sister and the serpentine

pairing: morgie le fay x fem!reader (requested!)

summary: you’re the little sister of james hook… and the girlfriend of his friend, morgie.

type: fluff

CW: none

WC: 1.8K

not proofread!

“Morgs, you know James is going to kill us. He hates the idea of us even being together.”

You sat down on Morgie’s bed, staring over at your brother’s empty one. You and Morgie had been together for almost a year, much to your older brother’s dismay. He was protective, but to the point of being over-bearing. No one was good enough for his little sister in his eyes, not even one of his closest friends, which made forming relationships of any kind difficult.

But, along with being Hook’s younger sister, you were also a member of the VKs… sorta. You were a member by association, but you didn’t really agree with all of the “villain” stuff. It made Morgie, and your brother, happy though, so you just learned to mind your business.

“Come sit with me. We’re just watching a movie, it’ll be okay.” He reached for you, making grabby hands. You hesitated before scooting closer to him, resting your head against his shoulder. “Fine. But, if he tries to kill you, I’m not stopping him this time.”

“He’ll come around, I know it.” Morgie wrapped his arms around you, nuzzling his cheek against the top of your head. You looked up at him. “Morgs, he tried to make you walk the plank.”

“He was just messing around… I think.”

The door slammed open, Hook walking in and setting his stuff down on his bed, his back turned to the couple. “Morgie Le Fay, get away from my sister.” He grumbled as he slipped his boots off, tossing them on the ground. “Come on, James. We’re just watching a movie.” You sat up, looking over at him. He turned to face you, a disgusted look on his face. “No, this isn’t happening.”

Hook crawled onto the bed, squishing himself between you and Morgie. “So… how’s it going?” he asked. You huffed, getting off of the bed. “You cannot keep doing this! We have not been able to hang out alone literally at all! It’s been ten months, James! Let it go!”

“Hook, I really-” Morgie started, but was quickly cut off by Hook. “You need to shush. Y/n, I am only trying to protect you. Feel lucky that you have someone there for you.” You stared at the floor, feeling slightly guilty. You understood what he was saying. But, if there’s something about the Hooks, it’s that they are all stubborn.

“James… I am not a baby. I love you, and you know that I do. But, I’m a big girl. I can handle myself, and I need you to trust me.” You put your hands on his arms, giving him the same puppy dog pout that you used to always get your way. You couldn’t help it, it’s a little sister thing. “Fine. But, I’m keeping my eye on you. Both of you.” he said, looking over at Morgie specifically. Morgie gave him a thumbs up, looking only slightly terrified.

Hook rolled his eyes, turning around to put his boots back on. “I’ll be back later. Clothes stay on, lights stay on, and doors stay unlocked.” You giggled, wrapping your arms around him. “Aye aye, Captain.” He gently pushed you away. “Enough of that. Stay safe, you know where to find me if you need me.” he said, ruffling your hair before making his way out.

“So… movie time?” Morgie asked. You ran over to him, jumping into his arms to press a kiss against his cheek. “I love you, my serpentine.”

You were sat with Morgie in the courtyard, eating your lunches together. “Morgs, we’ve been together for almost a year, how did I not know that you’ve never had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?” you asked, ripping your sandwich into two halves and handing him a half. “My mom never made me anything like this. In fact, she never really made me anything… at all. Is it good?”

“It’s salty and sweet all in one. Try it!” You pushed the sandwich towards his lips, encouraging him to take a bite. He hesitated before taking a small bite, his eyes instantly lighting up. “Holy serpentine, this is amazing. Can you make me one tomorrow?” You chuckled, leaning your head against his shoulder. “I would love to, Morgie.”

“You know, uh, Castlecoming is coming up soon. I was wondering if you, you know, had any interest in going?” He seemed suddenly fidgety, playing with the rings on his fingers. You blushed, sighing dramatically. “I’m not sure, no one’s asked me yet. But, I think if someone wants me to go, then they should ask me.” Morgie got up quickly. “Right, right!” He got on one knee, making your eyes almost pop out of your head.

“Y/n, do you wanna go to-”

“WHAT?” A voice screamed from the other side of the courtyard. The two of you looked over at the source of the sound, seeing Hook stomping over. “What are you doing?! Get up!” he yelled at Morgie, grabbing the fabric of his shirt and pulling him up. “Are you stupid? If you wanna be stupid, I’ll show you stupid.”

“James! James, he was asking me to Castlecoming! Maybe not in the best way, but it wasn’t anything else!” You stepped between the two of them, Morgie grabbing onto you. Hook narrowed his eyes at Morgie before letting his shirt go. “James, what happened to letting it go?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I’m sorry! I thought he was going to ask you to marry him, he literally got down on one knee.” You rolled your eyes, gently pushing your brother away. “Well, he isn’t, so you can go.”

“Sorry, Hook.” Morgie mumbled, still hiding behind you.

“It’s okay, Morgie. Just… don’t do that again. You’re going to give me a heart attack.” he grumbled, patting your shoulder before walking away. You turned around to face Morgie. “You know that he’s not gonna hurt you, right? He loves you, even if he doesn’t show it.” You booped the tip of his nose, his shoulders relaxing at your touch. “I know, I know. I just don’t wanna mess this up. I love you, and he’s my friend. There’s a lot riding on me getting this all right.”

“Morgie, you don’t have to worry about being perfect.” You wrapped your arms around him, pulling him close to you. “I love you, no matter what. I also know that my brother loves you. Stop worrying about being perfect, I can tell that it’s driving you crazy.” Morgie took a deep breath, leaning into your touch. “I know, I know…”

Holding onto him, you pressed a kiss to his forehead. “By the way, of course I’ll go to Castlecoming with you. There’s no one else that I would rather go with.”

“You know, you’re really nice for a pirate.” he commented. “Yeah, yeah. This pirate just has a soft spot for you.”

“You said yes? Tell me you said yes, I don’t think I could stand seeing his heart broken like that. It’s like watching an abandoned puppy.” Hades looked over at you. You, Maleficent, and Hades were all sat in Uliana’s lair. Hades had become like a second older brother to you. Maleficent seemed like she could care less, but she truly had a soft spot for you.

“Of course I said yes! As much as I hate dances, I know that he’s really excited to go. He’s been really stressed lately, James isn’t making it easy on him.” you sighed, toying with one of the many rings on your fingers. You truly loved your brother with all of your heart, but he was going to drive your boyfriend to insanity. Hades shrugged. “He’s just looking out for you. But, I get it. I’ll tell him to lay off of the kid.”

“Thank you, Hades. Your efforts do not go unappreciated.” you mumbled.

“Trust me, I know.”

You got up, brushing the dust from the floor off of your knees. “Okay, I’m going to go find Morgie. It’s date night tonight.” Maleficent snickered, looking up at you. “Date night? What are you, forty?” You rolled your eyes, making your way out of the lair. “Yeah, love you too, Mali.”

On the way out, you ran into Hook. He came up to you, grabbing your shoulders. “Hey, I need you to follow me.” You looked around, absolutely confused. “What? I can’t, I’m going to go see Morgie.” Hook just shook his head, pulling a piece of fabric out of his pocket. “I need you to follow me, no questions asked, and I also need you to put this blindfold on.”

“Absolutely not, James.”

“Y/n Hook, I need you to trust me.” he huffed. You groaned, grabbing the fabric from him. “Okay, fine. But, I still don’t trust you.” You covered your eyes with the fabric, tying it around the back of your head. He took your hand once the blindfold was tied, starting to walk with you. “Where’re we going?” you asked.

“Like I said, no questions asked. You’ll know when we get there.”

It seemed like you were walking for literal hours until Hook finally stopped, making you bump into his back. You growled, reaching to take the blindfold off. He quickly grabbed your hand. “Not until I say. Have some patience, lass.” You felt yourself getting more angry as you heard hushed whispers around you. “I’m losing all of my patience, James.”

“Okay, okay. You can take it off.”

You ripped the blindfold off, your jaw dropping at the sight in front of you. The forest in front of you was decorated in string lights, making it look like the starry night sky above you. On the ground was a bunch of blankets and different foods, all of them being your favorites; including peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Stood right in the center of everything was Morgie. He grinned, walking over to you. “I know you said that I don’t have to be perfect, but I think that this is something that should be perfect, and it really wasn’t the first time that I did it. You’re perfect, and I think that it would be perfect if you were my date to Castlecoming?” he asked, nervousness seeping through his voice.

You squealed excitedly, jumping up and down like a kid on Christmas. “Yes, Morgie! Oh my god, this is amazing? Did you do this all by yourself?” You looked around, taking in every single tiny detail. “I had a little help from a certain someone.” Looking over at Hook, you raised a brow. He nodded, an almost unnoticeable smile on his face. “Anything for my baby sister.”

Before he could even process, your arms were around him in a tight embrace. “Thank you, you mean the world to me.” Hook rolled his eyes playfully, hugging you back. “Okay, enough with the sappy crap. Enjoy your little date.”

You nodded, going back over to Morgie. He cupped your cheeks, pressing a short kiss to your lips. “I made some of those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I ate a few while we were setting up, but there’s still a few left.”

“You’re such a dork, Morgs.”

a/n: hook would be the best big brother ever, you cannot change my mind. thank you for reading, i hope you enjoyed!! MWAH MWAH MWAH!!

taglist: @skellseerwriting @sleepyking @ljaylmaoo @lesbpotmurdocklokistan @yokolesbianism @eretsupremacy89 @descendantsramblings @thegoddessofnothingness

[fruitgummies01]

So I managed to get time tonight to see Jung Kook's 'I Am Still' documentary, and I have many thoughts lol.

Spoiler Free Review

JK is so ridiculously talented. I'm sure it was already obvious. but seeing him in the studio, recording his first album, was amazing. He has such a unique ear for music, and it was impressive to hear him in the studio with his English-speaking producers in the U.S. JK repeatedly talked about how nervous he was whenever he was doing something new, and the astounding thing is you could never tell. His nervousness never showed. He was always delivering at such a high level, that you could never tell in any of his performances. Hearing his luscious vocals and tone in surround sound in a loud theater was worth the price of admission alone.

Spoiler Filled Review Below

There's honestly not too much to spoil. If you watched many of JK's performances during his promo run, you probably have already seen like 80% of the documentary. The TSX performance in Times Square, GMA, Global Citizens Festival, the Golden Live on Stage Showcase, and one of the performances he did in the UK were all highlighted. It's crazy that JK was sick through so much of his promo run. One of the only times he mentioned in the documentary that he was feeling in good condition was for the TSX performance. It was also very obvious how much JK's staff loves him. The fact that they were always taking care of him and asking how he slept, and would cheer if he slept well was sweet.

The behind-the-scenes of Jung Kook recording Standing Next to You, going to the doctor before his GMA performance, and the cutting of his hair all felt like the most significant scenes to me that were actually new. JK recording SNTY really showcased his genius as a musically gifted artist. I mentioned this earlier in my spoiler-free section but JK has a remarkable ear for music, and the fact he could hear a note sung by a producer, immediately knew what they wanted and how to sing it, and deliver it back despite the language barrier was insane. Even though JK was too humble to admit it in the documentary, he 1000% is a musical genius with an innate natural ability that can't be taught.

In terms of appearances by other members, there was not much. While rehearsing Permission to Dance for Global Citizen Festival (I think lol) JK mentioned that Jin and Jimin drive him crazy because of how high their parts are in the song, and that fact he had to sing their parts 😅. He visited Barnes and Noble and saw all the members albums. Tae made a suuuuuper awkward appearance while JK was recording lol. JK's one-arm sideways half hug (with his other hand still in his pocket) made me laugh. Next, Jimin. I have no idea if JK had any input on how the documentary was put together, but Jimin making an appearance at the very end, being one of the last things included, actually felt so meaningful. JK had just buzzed off the rest of his hair, had finished recording Never Let Go, and went to find Jimin. Seeing Jimin's full body reaction to seeing JK's hair for the first time felt equal parts funny and emotional. JK leaned into Jimin as Jimin rubbed his head and then asked him how it looked, like he needed his encouragement at that moment. I thought it was really touching. The scene with Jimin and the scene with his barber/hairstylist who cried after cutting JK's hair felt like two of the most personal scenes in the film that didn't have to do with JK as the artist, but with Jung Kook the person.

This leads me to a few of my issues. While I loved it, I did at times find myself wishing it was a little more personal. A lot of time was spent on interviews with his English-speaking producers who worked on Golden and their thoughts, but thankfully PDogg and Son Sung Deuk were also included to add some much-needed insight into Jung Kook as a person. (I don't want to get flamed for mentioning it, but I really hated seeing Scooter appear, but thankfully he remained in the background during Seven's recording.) The jumping around in time didn't really work for me either, but maybe it's because I was crazy locked in during that time and know the exact order in which his performances happened lol. I also wonder why they didn't include more rehearsal or practice dance footage. They included sooo many full performances from Golden Live on Stage and so much hard work and preparation had to have gone into pulling that off, so it was a little surprising not to see much behind-the-scenes content from it. Or maybe BigHit is saving that footage to use at a later time, which would be very like them lol.

Overall, I would HIGHLY recommend everyone watch 'I Am Still' to see Jung Kook's genius at work on the big screen!!! For a 1 hour and 33 minute documentary , it was time very well spent. Again thank you again to the anon who messaged me asking for my review, this very very long review is really all your fault haha. 😅

[lovelaceisntdead]

depression is the stupidest thing ever. like literally just stop that.

[pepprs]

[genderfluid-druid]

Hmm.

[noxtivagus]

i shld sleep oh my god

[autism-disco]

they (or i guess me) put the music in the water and called it a day it sounds nice but it’s lying it’s not actually 12/8 it’s just 4/4 but it’s q little dancey tune

[just-some-random-blogger]

I NEED MORE CREGAN STARKKKKK

Pelts

You were not one to grow jealous, but the knowledge that Lord Stark's favorite pelt cloak was a gift of affection from his old sweetheart inspired anything but affection from you.

Cregan Stark x Reader | 1k+ | cw: fem!reader, wife!reader, jealousy, pettiness, fluff, a bit of angst ig????, etc.

A/N: hey nonnie im honored you like my cregan stuff. this is my first req since closing them. i feel like perhaps this is the world telling me i need to start writing fluff again............ lol HAHAH

The Lord of Winterfell had just arrived. Normally, I would meet him with a smile and brush the snow from his shoulders before warming his cheeks with the heat from my own palm. But today, neither did I brush the snow from his cloak, nor did I rub his cheeks. How irritating that he did not see to mind or even notice.

I do not fault him for lapping his meal like a starved beast. He rarely has time to have a proper meal when he is working, let alone when his duty calls him all the way up to The Wall for days on end. And yet, as he gobbled up his food, as though he was denied his whole life, my own appetite left me at the sight.

His tongue swiped the corner of his mouth and yet evidence of his meal remained. He chewed eagerly as he reached out for a cup of wine to wash everything down.

I could not help the face I made at the sound of his belch.

Only then did he recognize me. He sets his cup down, "wife," says Cregan, "you are not eating."

I raise my brows and press my lips into a smile, "I am not hungry, my lord."

My lord. Cregan straightens up from his seat and leans back. He clears his throat as his face twists warily, "are you well?"

I do not respond. I rest my hands upon the table. The candlelight between us flickers momentarily.

He gulps and sets his utensils down. He sighs slowly, "have I offended?"

I clench my hands tightly.

Cregan's eyes flicker to them. He wipes his mouth with a napkin and looks up at me. He does not like that my expression remains the same.

"Your pelt... milord," I mutter.

Immediately, the pelt upon his shoulders feel like a tonne. He rolls his shoulders back and immediately undoes it, "forgive me. It is inappropriate to have it on while-"

"Who gifted it to you?"

He freezes midway. He waits for me continue as he slowly places his cloak upon his lap. His eyes widen slightly, in confusion, in alarm. Was it a gift? He does not recall.

His silence is aggravating. I clench my jaw and lean forward, "do you not wish to tell me?"

Cregan opens his mouth.

"She told me herself."

A line forms between his brows, "who?"

"Lady Tallart."

He pinches his lips together. Lady Tallart? It could not be Edmond Tallart's mother who gifted this. It must be his wife... but which house did she belong to before she was wed?

He looks as though he is trying to recall the instance, the exact moment wherein his cloak was given to him. Somehow, the arduous recollection spurs me further into animosity. I growl, "do you truly not remember?"

He shakes his head, "I do not."

I clear my throat and push myself up from my seat.

Cregan stands quickly, so quickly, in fact, that his chair falls behind him with a loud thud, not that he cares. He calls my name out with concern and it makes me snap.

"I would appreciate it if you chose another cloak to wear."

The man walks over to me, forcing me to lift my gaze upon his worried face. I raise a hand at him before he can think to touch my arm. He withholds his touch.

"Cassandra and I had a cloak tailored in your absence. If it pleases you, you should wear it. However, if it is not to your taste, I can-"

"It is my taste," he interrupts. He nods his head, "the pick of my wife is my taste. I will wear it"

The glow of candlelight on Cregan's cheek makes my stomach roll. Bile rises up from my throat as his brows furrow in nothing but further concern.

"I care little for what I wear," he casts his cloak off to the side, "I care more for what concerns you."

My irritation over the matter bursts into embarrassment in an instant. A burning sensation creeps up from behind me, and soon I can no longer look upon my husband. I look back to the candle on the table and rashly gather my food. Before Cregan can speak, I mutter under my breath, "please enjoy your food, husband."

There's little he can do but watch as I rush off. Two wolves battle inside him, one that wishes to chase after, and another that keeps him still where he stands. Just as he is about to obey the former, the servant girl, Cassandra, comes up to him, "milord. Might I speak my piece?"

He watches as his wife disappears and sighs. He turns to Cassandra, "speak it."

She frowns, "milady has spent the three nights you were away making you a cloak herself."

"Has she?" his brows tighten.

Cassandra nods, "but her needlework is not as good as she wished, which is why she bought you this, milord," she hands him a neatly folded cloak.

Cregan takes it from her and sighs deeply. He unfolds the garb and inspects his wife's gift. He hangs the fabric on his arm and releases another breath, "will you show me my wife's needlework?"

Cassandra looks apprehensive, but she obeys her lord.

The next morning, I rouse to an empty bed. A thousand pins prick my heart, but I have no one to blame but myself for the turn of events.

I sit with myself, all lonesome, before deciding to begin my day. But just before I can dress myself, I hear a commotion from outside my window. I gasp when I see that there had been a buck who wandered inside the stronghold, running around in panic.

I wrap myself with a shawl before opening my window, watching how my husband and his men were trying to scare the deer towards the gate. Soon enough, my jaw drops at the sight of the horrid thing resting upon Cregan's shoulders as he maneuvered around the large creature.

Thankfully, it did not take the deer long to find the exit of Winterfell. The men share relieved sighs and laughter amongst themselves, as did I.

"My lord!"

Cregan, who was now calming down one of the spooked horses, does not hear me.

"My lord!" I call louder, gaining the attention of someone else.

Cregan is pat on the back. A man points skyward. He looks over his shoulder, face brightening at the sight of me. "Lady Stark," Cregan smiles, offering me a nod, "did we wake you?"

I shake my head, "what are you wearing?"

He turns to me and adjusts his lopsided cloak. The thing was hardly even worthy to be called one with how one hem barely met the man's calf and how one shoulder was far fuller than the other. He calls out proudly, "the work of my wife's hands!"

My face contorts, "it is horrid! Remove it at once."

Cregan pulls his head back, "I shall do no such thing."

"I bought you-"

"But I enjoy this," he lifts an arm to flaunt the terrible craftsmanship, "it keeps me warm and it suits me well."

"It does not!"

Cregan furrows his brows in challenge, "does it take away from my handsomeness, wife?"

I press my lips into a line.

The men around him chortle or snigger. Even mine own lips cannot help the chuckle that spills out. And though he was far, I could tell Cregan was awfully pleased with himself.

"If you wish to rid me of this, then you must do so yourself," he strokes the horse's snout, "but know you are challenging the Warden of the North as you do."

I roll my eyes and shake my head, "it is the work of my hands, Lord Stark."

"Which is why you must not rid me of it, my Lady Stark."

We stare at each other for a moment. Cregan's lips curl into a lopsided grin that matches his cloak. I sigh and shake my head once more, "we will speak of this later."

He nods, "as you wish, my love."

I clear my throat and close the window, ignoring the way my belly tumbled at the sound of his pet name.

[anonymouspuzzler]

HAPPY UPDATE DAY!!! 🏠

After all this time, all this hard work, I can finally tell you all more about my work on Welcome Home beyond "Dude Just Trust Me I Work On It I Swear" !!

I've been calling myself the "production manager" because a lot of what I've done has been in that realm - making checklists and spreadsheets, doing research, sending emails, and generally keeping our wonderful team on track to do the incredible things they do, with all the support they need! I'm very lucky and grateful to get to support Clown and all the incredible actors and artists we've brought on!!

that said, over the time I've been part of this project (I looked back and realized February 1st this year is when it all Officially Began, can you believe it), I've gotten to work on some more obvious, visible things you'll find on the site today as well! most prominently, I am very proud to say, I was the curator of the very real Welcome Home exhibition!! Clown was extremely generous and supportive in letting me bring his work into the world this way, and with their help it became bigger and better than I ever could have dreamed! Though this iteration was very small and private due to our venue, I hope the few of you I know who attended enjoyed it very much, and for the rest, know we hope to find ways to host the exhibition in other and more public venues in the future! (Where and when, I don't know, but I'll work hard to make it happen...!)

As part of the exhibition, I was able to create a lot of new props to help build the world of Welcome Home! Most excitingly, I was able to create a real working toy telephone, and help Clown to find our talented group of voice actors to provide the recordings! And of course, I was able to meet dear sweet Wally and Home themselves, who were the sweetest little peanuts and a true pair of professionals! Just delights to work with!!

Though this was my most prominent contribution, somehow, that wasn't all! You will find bits and pieces of my art and writing all over the newest website update (some places more obvious than others...), and I was able to contribute to building many of the new and updated site pages as well! We've all worked so hard on everything you'll find there, so I hope you all enjoy the exciting new additions to the neighborhood!

My final little statement while I have my sweet little soapbox here... every last one of you who has provided support, even just one ko-fi tip, has Directly made this update Possible!! Not only do these tips allow us very literally to pay for supplies, art, voice work and the like, it very directly Supports and Improves the livelihoods of every single person involved!! so if you have the means, and would like to do so, please do consider tipping or subscribing to Clown and/or any of the other artists and actors involved!

And with all that... thank you, neighbors!! And Welcome Home!!

[gojoidyll]

stubborn heart ch. 3

yan!capitano x wife!reader

summary | or in which capitano is told he needs a wife. and he begrudgingly agrees.

previous | next

After your “wedding” of signing marriage papers and Capitano’s disappearance after taking the documents away, you found yourself alone in the mansion. The blanket still engulfing you in a tight embrace as you sat in a momentary silence at the table.

“What am I supposed to do now?”

You posed the question to yourself when you looked around the massive dining room. Your eyes scanning the walls, the paintings, the decorations and even the windows. Capitano had stated that working or doing any sort of maid duty was unneeded.

“Am I really going to be doing nothing for the rest of my life?”

You shook your head at that, no way! You absolutely refused to be bored.

Standing up from the chair you decided to head back to your room and get ready for the day. Luckily you still have some money left from when you worked diligently at the hearth, so maybe it was time to go on a little shopping spree, but…

You stopped suddenly once you got to the stairs at that thought.

“That’s right… he said I need to inform him when I leave this place…wait a second.”

You immediately brightened just then, a smile stretching across your lips as you hiked up the blanket and started up the stairs, “he said I just needed to notify him when I leave, not to get his permission!”

It was a loophole, but a way to at least do your own thing. Though, how to notify him? You didn’t exactly know where he went. He either left the house to hand deliver the documents or went to file them somewhere in the house. Honestly, you weren’t sure who the documents the went to after their signed. All you knew was how weddings worked, not the wedding documents.

Finding your room, you quickly went in and towards the closet. Opening the door, you froze. Your clothes were in there, but were hanging next to someone else’s as well.

“We- we’re sharing a room,” you whispered yelled to yourself as you briefly went over Capitano’s clothing, “well- I guess since we’re married now it will only make sense that we share a room,” you muttered. Though, you were sort of nervous. Does that mean you both will be sleeping in the same bed tonight?!

Hastily grabbing some of your own clothes to throw on, you were careful not to accidentally pull one of Capitano’s down along with your own, then heading out fo the closet you went to dresser and pulled one of the drawers open before shutting it closed a millisecond later.

THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT MY UNDERWEAR-

Calming yourself for a moment as you still couldn’t believe that you were living in a time where you would actually see Capitano’s underwear, you started going through the other drawers before finally finding your underwear and bras all neatly sorted.

“I sure hope the maids were the ones to put these here,” you said sadly to yourself. Because despite being part of the House of the Hearth you never actually lived a life of luxury much like the others who were maids or the ones who joined the fatui. You were paid, of course, but not enough to afford luxury clothing. So a lot of your panties and bras were … very very plain. Definitely not something sexy that a wife would wear.

You paused at that thought, “wait, why am I worrying? He said not to expect anything so it’s not like I’ll be dressing up for him…”

You grabbed a clean pair of underwear and a bra, “so I have nothing to-“

You looked over when you finally noticed a presence by the doorway.

“Do you always talk to yourself?”

Why must he always catch me doing something stupid?! Will I never give the man a good impression of myself?!

“Not- not always,” you mumbled as Capitano entered the room. Noticing his stair, you hid your undergarments under your other clothes that you were carrying.

“Are you planning on going somewhere?”

Luckily he decided not to dwell on your embarrassing moment much like last time. (Thankfully.)

“Yes, I was… going to let you know that I was going to go to town.”

“For what purpose?”

“I want to buy some new books.”

He regarded you for a moment before pulling something out his cloak and holding it out to you. Tilting your head to the side, you looked up at him quizzically.

“Mora. For your shopping.”

You instantly shook your head, “what- no! I can’t take your money!”

“You no longer work at the hearth, nor do you have an income now. So I have already expected that you will be needing this-“

You cut him off which surprised you, “I- I don’t need your mora, ok? I have my own, and I plan on looking for a job in town as well.”

It felt like you just annoyed him, but you were insistent. He told you not to expect anything, so you weren’t going to expect any mora from him as well.

“As you wish,” he finally said when he didn’t detect any sort of wavering in your stance. The bag of mora disappearing behind his cloak as he most likely hung it back on his belt, “though, if you do find a job I expect to be-“

“Notified of it,” you finished.

“Hmm, you’re quite mouthy.”

“I- I was only finishing-“

“My sentences. I got that. Now, I will be leaving also. I have some business to attend to with the other harbingers.”

You nodded, still a bit lost on the exchange you both shared.

“Would you like to leave together?”

You shook your head at that, “no Lord Capitano. I still have to get ready, and I don’t want you to have to wait on me.”

He nodded, but before he turned to leave, he spoke to you once more, “there is no need to refer to me as Lord anymore.”

“Alright… Capitano.”

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some say "no blogs found" </3

[tender-rosiey]

Since your requests are open I'll help myself 😋 Gojo's wife starts to have morning sicknesses, so she suspects that she's pregnant. She takes a test and finds out that she actually is pregnant. Would u please write gojo's reaction when his wife tells his that he's gonna be a daddy? 🥺💕 thanks you, please feed us with your delicious writing!!!

Also if you're not feeling well then please ignore this. Take care! Mwah^•^♡

weight — gojo satoru x f!reader

a/n: I hope you like this, luv 🥺💕 thank you so much for your kind words and take care of yourself as well! many kisses and hugs 🫶

“shoko, I need a place to hide!” you say, bursting into the infirmary. you take the small moment of shock that shoko is in to take a much needed breath.

“what did you do this time?”

you wordlessly raise the pregnancy test with slightly shaky hands and upon seeing it, shoko drops the poor sandwich she was eating. you close the door behind you before sitting down next her.

she smiles, “nice, I am going to be an aunt,” then she looks at you confused, “why are you hiding though?”

“I need time to figure out how I will tell him or more like—“ you look at the ceiling, “face him. he will probably figure everything out with his six eyes, but I don’t know how he will react,” you wrap your arms around yourself and shoko sighs.

“you guys didn’t talk about it yet?” she stands up and goes to get you a warm drink.

you gently rock yourself, “satoru already…has so much on his shoulders,” you bury your face in your arms, “I don’t want to add to that.”

she places the mug in front of you, “you do know that he got into this relationship willingly, right? you didn’t hold him at gunpoint or anything…or did you?”

you lightly punch her shoulders, but you take the mug, muttering a small thanks, “if anyone was held at gunpoint then it would be me.”

shoko chuckles and pats your head, “you need to be able to face him, y/n. he will find out anyway, and personally, I think you should have faith in his reaction more than that,” you lock eyes, “you know him more than anyone else, after all.”

your gaze falls to your drink. its surface is so still until you softly blow and it ripples, calm the chaos.

what if you don’t know satoru as much as you thought? what if having a kid will scare him away?  as the strongest, your husband has so much on his mind 24/7. will he be able to handle a baby as well?

while a part of you tells you that your husband is no coward nor is he so fragile, the other can’t help but think that perhaps this love story of 12 years will reach its end, a very tragic end even.

with the creation of a new life, ends a lifetime of feelings and events.

you snap out of your thoughts when you notice shoko shooing you into the closet room.

you hear the door open and you have a guess who it is. he makes himself known anyway, “shoko,  have you seen y/n?”

shoko quirks an eyebrow and gojo huffs, “okay, fine, I know she is here, but is she mad at me? did I do something?”

you have a feeling that he is looking directly at your eyes even through the closet’s door as he speaks, “y/n, I will take you out anywhere. I don’t know what I did, but let me make it up to you. I hate when you’re upset with me, sweets.”

he is frowning lightly as he stares at the closet with hope. shoko sighs before walking out of the room, but not without patting his shoulder.

the door closes and satoru speaks up again, “can you please come out so we can at least talk about it?”

he hears your sigh and beams when you finally get out of the room, “there is my pretty girl.”

he has a flower bouquet in hand and he is looking at you so intently, but you don’t think he noticed the life growing inside of you now. he is far too focused on making you forgive him for whatever he did. you take a deep breath and look him in the eyes.

your hand moves and finally rests on your stomach.

his brows furrow lightly before his eyes widen. satoru’s breath hitches just like it did during your wedding. he places the bouquet aside before looking quickly between your eyes and stomach, “you are…”

you grip your own hands, nodding. tears start forming in your eyes till they finally fall and cries are what he sees now. your knees give out on you and you fall to the ground, now sobbing.

you are looking at the ground as you cry and hug yourself tighter, bracing yourself for whatever is coming.

satoru, almost instantly, finds himself on his knees in front of you.

his arms, like it’s second nature, pull you close into a warm and secure hug, “hey, hey,” he pats your back, a little clumsily, “if you don’t want it then it’s fine. you know I care about you the most,” his voice shakes a bit, “don’t cry please, you’re breaking my heart—“

“I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry,” you repeat a mantra of the same phrase as you pull him even closer. satoru cups your face and the moment you’re met with the pair of blue eyes you love so much, you break down more, “I know you—probably don’t want it but—“

he tilts his head, utterly confused and maybe even offended, “what are you talking about? of course, I want it!”

the room is silent for a moment as you process what he says. it’s like a massive weight has been lifted off your shoulders. you let out a shaky breath as you look down at your hands.

satoru rests his forehead on your own. his voice is soft and barely above a whisper as he speaks, “it’s our baby.”

the content smile on his face is almost unreal, “why in the world would you think that I wouldn’t want it anyway?” and somehow the pout on his face assures you even more.

your arms wrap themselves around his torso and you rest your head on his shoulder, “it’s just—I thought it would be burdening you with yet another responsibility. you have the world on top of your shoulders. how am I better than anyone if I weigh down even if it’s a different type of weight.”

“is it a weight for you?” he asks, voice hushed.

“of course not! I want—“ you answer immediately.

“there is your answer,” he chuckles and you look at his face once again.

you notice that he is tearing up. your satoru is tearing up, and the blindfold isn’t there to hide it nor are the glasses.

his eyes never leave yours as he says, with no waver on his voice, “I would pick you over everything else, every single time and in every single universe, silly girl.”

“you should know that already,” he flicks your forehead but the smile never leaves his face.

a soft laugh tumbles out of his lips as he pulls you in for a big bear hug, his form completely engulfing your own.

he fills tears stain his shirt, but he can only focus on your smile he feels on his skin and the fact that he voice out loud, “I will be a dad,” he sighs with contentment.

“and it’s all because of you,” he raises your face and nuzzles your noses together making you giggle, “we're going to be parents, you sweet pretty thing.”

satoru’s lips find themselves on your own in one very sweet and loving kiss. it’s soft, light, and gentle. yet it conveys all the words that he can’t get out at the moment.

when you pull away slightly, he quickly pulls you back for another, “I love you so much.”

he places a hand on your stomach, “and you too.”

“but don’t think I will share mama with you,” he sticks his tongue out at it, “she is mine!”

the baby is not even out of the womb, and yet he is already bickering with it.

you laugh and your chest feel so light. you kiss his cheek and his pout turns into a grin almost immediately. you hum, “infinity and beyond?”

his hand holds your own and he caresses your ring, “infinity and beyond.”

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copyright © tender-rosiey

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

[luxaofhesperides]

a safe place to rest - duke

(part 3 of the harmless series)

Although he hears about the baby, Duke doesn't get to meet her for a few days.

He does meet someone else though: Danny.

"You need anything before I go?"

He doesn't want to leave Danny alone in the Hatch. Not out of mistrust or anything, but because he's sure that the moment he looks away, Danny's going to disappear again. It took so long just to convince him to take a moment to breathe, to rest and recover from whatever he's gone through.

There's a frantic sort of energy surrounding Danny that has his aura all messed up, which is the only reason Duke decided against letting anyone else know that he found Danny.

He got the basic rundown from the night shift, but he hadn't had time to look more into it before Danny was crashing into him during his day patrol, eyes wide and wild and looking like his world had just ended.

"You," Danny had gasped, "You're with—Batman? Please, take these." And he shoved a bag against Duke's chest.

He had to react fast to grab it, and then grab Danny when he all but collapsed against him.

Now, he sits on top of the spare bed Duke set up in the Hatch, pale and tired and quietly devastated. "I'm fine," he insists. "You don't need to do anything for me."

Duke frowns. "Uh, I absolutely do, you think I'm just gonna leave you to fend for yourself? Come on, man, that's not how I do things."

"You don't owe me anything."

"Obviously not. It's not about owing things. I'm doing this because you need help and I can give it."

"I can take care of myself," Danny says firmly, and Duke holds back a sigh. Yeah, this guy really is Batman's kid. Horrible self-care habits and all.

"You don't gotta, though. You get that, right? You can take one day off and just rely on me to take care of you until you're back on your feet."

"No."

Duke tries to shove his emotions down, to stay neutral and calm. This is a guy who came crashing into their lives, shoving a baby into Damian's arms, and then vanishing. This is a guy who's gone through way too much on his own. Of course he's not going to trust anyone. Duke knows well how heavy everything becomes when it feels like the world's against him. He can give Danny grace.

"Okay. Just so you know, I'm asking to be polite. I'm still going to grab some extra clothes for you, and a homemade meal, so you just stay here and get some sleep. We'll talk more when I get back from delivering all this to Batman." He lifts the bag Danny gave to him for emphasis, then pins the guy down with a hard stare. "You better be here when I get back, or I am going to have no one to show baby pictures to."

"…You're gonna check on Ellie?"

The clear concern and desperation in Danny's expression make him soften. "Yeah, man. I'll check on her and let you know how she's doing. That's why you gotta be here when I get back. Got it?"

Danny bites his lip, then nods slowly. "Yeah. Got it. Thank you."

"Get some sleep."

Duke pulls the door shut, setting the alarm system to quietly alert him if anyone goes in or out while he's not in the Hatch. There's a first aid kit on the table and some water bottles as well, but it's not going to be enough to really help Danny start to recover. Duke takes a moment to curse his past self for not better stocking his crash room for emergency visitors, but in his defense, he isn't in the habit of bringing anyone back to the Hatch, not even other Bats, when the Batcave is more suited for handling lots of people.

Well, it's something to work on in the future.

He doesn't get more than a few steps away when he hears the door opening behind him and looks back to see Danny poking his head out.

"Hey, before you go…"

"Yeah? What's up?"

"Can you maybe not tell anyone I'm here? I'm assuming you know who I am, since you know Ellie."

"Yeah, your Batman's first lost kid, right? Trust me, I've heard of you."

Danny winces. "Great. Figures. I just really need to not deal with all of them right now, so if you could keep all this quiet…"

Duke looks him over, takes in the paleness of his skin, how worryingly thin he is, the dark half-moons stamped under his eyes, and promptly decides then and there that the rest of the world is going to have to go through him to even think about going near Danny. It's a complicated situation he's in and if he needs time to prepare himself for meeting everyone else, who Duke knows from personal experience can be a lot, then Duke is going to make sure he has all the time he needs.

"You got it man. They won't hear a thing about this from me. I'll lock everyone else out of here, too, so you can rest easy. They ain't getting in here to bother you while I'm still around."

"Thank you," Danny says again, sagging against the doorframe. "I'm… I really need to sleep."

"Go crash," Duke says softly. "I can take care of things until you wake up."

Bruce is the only person in the Batcave when Duke arrives. He's bent over the Batcomputer, head in his hands, when Duke parks his motorcycle and heads for the stairs to meet him on the upper level. He keeps his footsteps purposefully loud so Bruce can track him as he makes his way over, Danny's bag slung over his shoulder.

"Rough night?" he asks, just to get the conversation started.

"Yes," Bruce sighs. "There have been a number of—changes."

"Oh. Good changes or bad changes?"

Bruce lifts his head as he considers the question, then rubs his temple. "Unclear. It's nice to see everyone working together for Ellie, but I'm—concerned."

"About what?"

"About Ellie. And everyone. And Danny."

Duke leans his weight against the desk and lets the bag drop off his shoulder, then holds it out to Bruce. "Well. I dunno if this will make things any better, but Danny threw this at me while I was on patrol. I took a quick look through it and, uh. It's kinda rough. It's what he went through and how Ellie was created."

Bruce snatches the bag from his hand and immediately begins rooting through it. "Is Danny—?"

"He vanished as soon as I grabbed the bag. I think he's got a few loose ends to tie up before he feels comfortable being here again."

"What did you think of him?"

Duke looks at Bruce, looks at the papers in his hands, and thinks of Danny. "I think he needs someone in his corner. I think we gotta lot to do to make the world safer for him and Ellie. I think he's been scared for a very long time."

Nothing in Bruce's expression changes, and there's no shift in his aura, his emotions tightly locked up as always. But Duke hasn't gotten this far without learning how to see the little things: Bruce's grip on the bag tightens, his feet shift farther apart, as though he's ready to leap up at a moment's notice, and his shoulders slump just slightly under the heavy weight of all the things he refuses to share.

Sighing, Duke tilts his head to look at Bruce more closely. "Why are you down here? It's the middle of the day."

"I'm researching."

A hand loosely gesturing to the large screen of the Batcomputer has Duke turning to see what Bruce has been so occupied with.

It's not case files, as he expected. It's not even research into Danny and what happened to him.

All that's there is PDFs upon PDFs of child psychology papers and essays on recovering from trauma and research on various methods to help children with failure to thrive and malnutrition and neglect.

There's also, in one window, different safety ratings of baby cribs.

Well. Let it be known that Bruce's love language is information.

"Cool. Have you spent any time with anyone since a baby got dropped in your lap?"

Bruce's silence is extremely telling.

Duke briefly considers trying to get Bruce to go upstairs, but he knows better than to pick a losing battle. Especially after he's handed him information on Danny.

At some point, Bruce will have to go upstairs, if only to eat. He's getting old, and his body can't quite keep going like it used to. Duke will let him deal with the consequences of his own actions, or lack of action, when that time comes. He's not a mediator or peace-keeper. Duke has other pressing matters to attend to.

Taking pictures of the baby for Danny is definitely more important than navigating the minefield of family tensions and miscommunications ever present with the Waynes.

Duke reaches out and claps a hand on Bruce's shoulder. "Don't get so caught up in getting all the pieces together that you forget to actually spend time with family. They're gonna need you now more than ever," he says, and waits until Bruce meets his eyes and gives a resolute nod before Duke stands and heads for the stairs that will take up him to the manor.

The sooner he gets back to Danny, the better.

Ellie is cute.

This isn't a surprise. Most babies are cute, and Ellie is no exception.

What Duke hadn't been expecting is how protective Damian is of her, or how everyone else orbits around the two, just on the edge of hovering. Damian's prickly personality is well known, so the rest of the Waynes have taken to acting like cats: always on the same floor, ready to pop in should they be needed, but otherwise out of sight.

"Thomas," Damian greets quietly. Ellie is asleep in the baby wrap keeping her secure against his chest, her head resting on his shoulder. Damian lowers his paintbrush, turning to give Duke his full attention.

Duke takes a hesitant step into Damian's studio, then walks up to him once he isn't hissed at to leave.

"So this is our newest troublemaker, huh?" he says, looking down at Ellie. "How's she doing?"

She's so small. Her head has some black hair on it, but it barely covers her ears.

Damian lays his brush down on the easel. "She's doing much better now that she's getting regular meals and care. She still doesn't make much noise. It is… concerning."

The raw fear and care in his gaze is what makes the words tumble out of Duke's mouth. "I have some news about Danny."

If anyone deserves to know about him, it's his little brother.

Damian's gaze snaps up to Dukes, a fierce light in them, and his hands raise to hold Ellie tightly. "What is it?"

"He gave me a bag while I was patrolling, then left. I looked through it before giving it to B, and it's all… I only read the papers, not anything on the flashdrives, but Danny went through some awful shit. He was captured and experimented on by some group called NOVA. They had him for some time doing tests before he was put in isolation for acting out. And then he kinda… went into a death-like stasis. They did more tests and took some bio-material from him to try to figure out how he was surviving in stasis, and used that to make Ellie with the genes of one of the other captured metas. Danny was in stasis for around seven years."

Reading about it, learning about what Danny went through made Duke's stomach turn. It was like something out of a nightmare. Duke knows the fears metas have to live with; he carries it too, a weight he can never put down.

There's a reason civilian metas try to keep their powers a secret. Metas go for a high price on the black market, are at a higher risk of human trafficking, are seen as the best test subjects by unethical scientists wanting to find some way to replicate those powers in other people or in weapons.

Summarizing the horrors Danny had to experience leaves a bitter taste on his tongue. The silence in the studio stretches long enough for Duke to regret opening his mouth. Damian's still a teenager. He may have had a different upbringing and be able to stomach what most people can't, but this is still his brother. Anyone would be rattled hearing about this.

Then, without a word, Damian stands. He storms out of the studio, leaving Duke to catch the stool he was sitting on before it hits the ground and wakes Ellie.

When he goes to catch up with Damian, the kid is already walking into another room, tension in every line of his body.

"Richard," he snaps quietly, and Duke watches as Dick pops up from where he was lounging on the floor on one of the softest rugs in the manor.

"Dami? What's wrong?"

Damian doesn't answer, just unwraps the baby sling and carefully passes a still sleeping Ellie over to Dick.

"Damian," Dick tries again, his voice hardening, demanding an answer even as he adjust Ellie in his arms to make sure she can continue sleeping comfortably.

"I need to speak with Father," Damian answers shortly. "I will be gone for some time. I am entrusting her to you."

Dick glances at Duke, who tries not to look too stressed or tense. He doesn't think it works.

Reaching out, Dick puts a hand on Damian's head, managing to ruffle his hair for a few seconds before Damian steps away, batting at his hand with a scowl. "Alright," Dick says, "But I'm sending someone to get you for dinner if you're not back by then."

Damian nods, then turns on his heel and leaves for Bruce's office.

Neither of them move until they're sure that Damian is out of earshot.

"What was that about?" Dick asks, lowering himself down onto the rug again, one hand rubbing small circles against Ellie's back.

Duke sighs. "You'll find out soon. Just... chill for now and let me get some cute baby pictures."

Dick, as he finds out, is actually pretty good at helping Duke get the cutest pictures of Ellie.

And when Ellie blinks her little blue eyes open, Duke's heart melts and he understands how she's got everyone wrapped around her fingers.

NOVA, whatever remains of them, is going to regret ever hurting Danny and Ellie.

Danny is asleep when Duke returns. He sleeps through the night, and when Duke wakes up early the next morning to make sure he hasn't disappeared, Danny remains motionless in his bed.

Is he in stasis again? Duke wonders, panicked, as he rushes into his crash room and gently shakes Danny, trying to wake him up.

It takes a few tries before Danny lets out a soft noise in the back of his throat. He turns his face into the pillow, then abruptly tenses up and shoots out of bed. In a blink, Danny's on the other side of the room, flying up to the ceiling where Duke can't easily reach him.

Hands up, palms open, Duke says, "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. How're you feeling?"

Danny sucks in a few deep breaths before he slowly floats down to the floor. His eyes are still too wide and there's a faint tremble in his hands. "Fine," he answers blankly.

"Up for eating something? I did promise you food and baby pictures."

Unsurprisingly, it's the mention of Ellie that gets Danny moving and brings some light back to his eyes. He follows Duke out into the main room of the Hatch. There's not really a kitchen in here, but there is a fridge and a microwave, which is enough for now.

One of his workstations has been cleared off and now has chairs around it to turn it into a makeshift dining table. On it, Duke's left a tupperware of French toast, made the way he remembers his dad making them when he was a kid, and as well as a store-bought container of cut fruit.

It's not really a lot, but it's what he could do on a short notice.

Danny takes a seat, and Duke settles in on the other side of the table, pulling out his phone to flip through the many pictures he took of Ellie.

Duke keeps up a light commentary as Danny slowly eats, sharing little stories about the Waynes and all the nonsense they get up to. That turns into sharing stories about the stupid shit he and his friends gets into, followed by some of the weirdest things criminals have done to try to get away from him, including the one that said 'nuh-uh!' when Duke said carjacking is the lamest crime to commit in Gotham.

That story gets Danny to smile, and it takes way too much effort to keep from celebrating it.

All the while, Danny slowly looks through each photo of Ellie, making sure she's okay. He looks so fond and sad that it's breaking Duke's heart, and he swears to himself then and there that he's going to do whatever he can to reunite them.

"Don't you have hero things to do?" Danny asks. It's the first thing he's said since they both sat down.

Duke shrugs. "Nah, not right now. Gotham can wait. You're my priority right now."

"You don't have to—"

"Nope. If you don't want anyone else to know you're here, then you're gonna have to deal with me."

Danny squints at him. "You're both very chill and very stubborn."

"It's the only way I was able to survive working with the other Bats."

"They sound… interesting."

"You can say they're a hot mess," Duke laughs. "But hey, who isn't?" He watches as Danny pushes around the last half of the French toast around the tupperware and straightens up from where he was leaning on the table. "Want me to put that up for you? You can finish it later."

Danny looks down at his plate, then slowly nods. "Yeah. Sorry."

"No worries. You went through some shit. It's not surprising that you don't have much of an appetite." Duke reaches over the table to pop the lid back on the tupperware, then stands to put it in the fridge.

When he turns back, Danny is no longer visible.

Or, at least, his physical body isn't visible. Duke can still easily see his aura, a vibrant green that has streaks of white moving through it like a current of water, which leaves an outline of his body. Danny is also trying to sneak out of the Hatch.

"Oh," he says, "I didn't know you had invisibility. That's pretty cool. I can still see you, by the way."

Danny becomes visible again, glaring at Duke.

"That's such a Batman move," Duke grins, "I should have expected it."

"What was a Batman move?"

"Sneaking away as soon as I turned around. B does that all the time with the Commish. And everyone else, honestly. Though, to be fair, we all do it because we all learned from him. Yeah, you'll have no trouble fitting in with us."

"I don't think what I'm doing should count, since I'm using powers."

"Dude, watch this."

Duke makes sure Danny's looking at him, then bends the light around him to hide him from view. He can see the exact moment Danny realizes he's vanished when his eyes go wide and he takes a few steps closer.

"Signal?"

"Still here," Duke reassures. "Haven't moved an inch." Then he releases his grip on the light around his head, a fun little trick he figured out a few years ago that makes it look like he's a floating, decapitated head. The goons always love that one.

Danny looks at his head. Looks at his invisible body. Then looks back to his head. "That is freaky," he says, a slow smile dawning across his face. "I can do that too."

And sure enough, Danny's body becomes invisible, save for the outline of it in his aura, and now there's just two floating heads in the Hatch.

He's not sure who cracks first, but in no time, they're laughing like everything's alright. Danny's expression brightens and suddenly he's years younger, all the stress falling off his shoulders in the face of their mirth. Like this, he could be any other guy in one of Duke's classes, talking nonsense just to pass the time, quick to laugh and without a care in the world.

This is what he wants for Danny.

This ease, this calm, this lightness in his heart: Duke will keep them safe for Danny.

If nothing else, Duke can be a safe place to land for another meta who needs, more than anything, someone willing to be there for him.

(masterpost for all parts)

[ravenscosmos]

THE ROLL OVER SIGNAL & SLEEP PARALYSIS

Hi ! I found yesterday a very interesting post on the internet where someone was talking about the roll over urge and its connection to sleep paralysis. I hope it may helps some people and maybe give a new perspective on it !

( cr to Nick Newport ! )

In the post he talks among other things about having discovered two types of sleep commands : "SLEEP STARTERS" & "SLEEP TRIGGERS" and I will get later a bit into them <mostly quoting him> , and how I personally understood them .

— SLEEP STARTERS !

" Sleep starters are what you use to get the body to start thinking maybe it’s time to fall asleep. For instance , using stop drop and roll is a sleep starter because it makes your body ask for permission to fall asleep artificially creating the roll signal. "

So basically , when you do certain things ( such as going to bed , lying down , stop moving as much as you do when you’re not planing on resting ) you‘re sending signals to your body which causes it to start thinking about falling asleep. [that’s also one of the reason many people experience the roll over urge , hot- and cold flashes , random itches,… these are all tricks your brain sends to you to figure out if the mind is asleep!]

— SLEEP TRIGGERS !

"Sleep triggers are how you then tell it :'Yes: fall asleep right now’. SDR has an implicit sleep trigger: when you simply ignore the roll over signal the body interprets it a trigger to enter sleep paralysis"

I am not really sure what SDR means , but : if you ignore the signals (roll over urge/ urge to move, urge to scratch,…) you‘re basically confirming to your body that you‘re asleep and if it‘s convinced it starts to put the body into a sleep paralysis to prevent your body from acting out in dreams ! — they also help to convert from a 'partial paralysis' into full paralysis

Before I explain a couple of triggers and starters I wanted to add that he said in his video that he did not meditate or that he was totally relaxed (in fact , he stated he was fairly tense) as he got a sleep paralysis! He simply just ignored the roll over urge . And due to him being extremely surprised that a wave of sleep paralysis rolled over him, he decided to experiment several months with different techniques , variations & ways to command the body into sleep !

SO : YOU DON‘T HAVE TO BE VERY RELAXED AND TO HAVE A CLEAR MIND INORDER TO EXPERIENCE SLEEP PARALYSIS !<3

of course it can make it waaay easier to archive a sleep paralysis and make things probably more comfortable and faster , BUT it’s not needed !

— ★ . SLEEP STARTER

" Stop Eye Micromovements "

"During the day the eyes are searching for changes in motion. Because of this they make tiny micro movements all the time and at the end of they day they are still making these micro movements even though you may want to go to sleep.

If you close your eyes and try to keep them still you'll find that after about 30 seconds they are still twitching very slightly. It's not easy to totally relax the eyes. However if you can keep them at complete ease for several minutes the body will interpret that as a signal that the mind may have fallen asleep. In fact if you keep your eyes still your body will often fall asleep even if the rest of your muscles are fairly tense "

He also says that you can before sleep , relax your eye muscles by rolling them around in wide circles in both directions several times to ease the tension and letting them rest !

[ Nick Newport also talks about another sleep trigger : mimicking sleep breathing & different breathing styles in order to trick the brain ! ]

• I tried it earlier myself , and I have to say that it really helps !

— ★ . SLEEP TRIGGERS

" Pause Breaths "

"The first trigger is pause breaths. When you reach 90% paralysis, the reason the body doesn't go to full paralysis is it has a bit of doubt about just how asleep the mind really is. This is because of muscle tension. The best solution is to relax more deeply but sometimes that's not possible.

What you can do is exhale and pause for 2 or 3 seconds. Relax as much as you can and then begin breathing again like normal. By relaxing your breathing you reduce your overall tension just barely enough to send a signal to complete the paralysis. During those 2 or 3 seconds you'll feel the paralysis deepening. Sometimes you may have to use 2 or 3 pause breaths about 15 seconds apart. When you do this, you're not trying to alter your blood oxygen levels or anything like that. The purpose is to simply lower your overall muscle tension just long enough to paralyze completely."

[ screen taken from his video ! ]

" Muscle Twitching "

"The second sleep trigger is muscle twitching which was actually the first sleep trigger I ever found. I reached partial paralysis and on a whim decided to try twitching my right forearm to see what happened. To my surprise my entire arm paralyzed. I then twitched my right calf and my right leg paralyzed. I gradually paralyzed my entire body that way and completed the separation.

In other words muscle twitching only paralyses the surrounding muscles. I've actually found that I could paralyze just a single finger by twitching it when in partial paralysis."

" How To Do Muscle Twitching "

"To do this twitch once every second or two when you're in about 95% paralysis. The twitch is very gentle and only lasts the smallest fraction of a second. If you twitch your forearm the rest of your arm should not move at all. If you twitch too hard you'll wreck the paralysis so keep it very light.

Probably the reason this works is when you dream you try to move your muscles but sleep paralysis prevents you from moving. However you do move your muscles just a bit when dreaming which causes muscle twitching. This means the body associates muscle twitching with deep sleep so one way to mimic deep sleep is to use muscle twitching."

" Up and Down Eye Movements "

"The third sleep trigger is up and down eye movements. With your eyes closed you simply move your eyes up and down as fast as you can for about 10 seconds. I've never been able to get it to work using left and right movements. However there is actually a type of hypnotic psychotherapy called "eye movement desensitization and reprocessing" or EMDR which uses side to side eye movements. You may try experimenting with side to side movement to complete partial paralysis but I find up and down is a safer bet."

— ★ . The "Order" to use Triggers

The most reliable strategy coming from him is to start with a few pause breaths , which usually is all it takes to get to 100% paralysis ! If that doesn’t work , he suggests using the twitching method. For the case that it’s still no use : the up and down eye movements. " If that doesn't work just relax for a few more minutes before using the triggers again. "

I want add at this point a couple of things : first of all , I think it totally depends on you , what you want to use first and also that you DON‘T need any of this methods to get into a sleep paralysis and that there are also countless other techniques. Not to forget,that your body experiences every time it goes into REM sleep, a sleep paralysis, just we‘re not aware of it because our minds aren‘t awake. So having a sleep paralysis is something normal and there is no need to overthink or beat yourself up over !<3

— ★ . When to use Sleep Triggers

"I've experimented using sleep triggers to go directly from awake to asleep but that doesn't seem to work. I find that for up and down eye movements to work you need to be in about 99% paralysis, muscle twitching works at about 95% paralysis and pause breaths work at about 90% paralysis. So it's best to start out using sleep starters and then switch to triggers for the last step."

— ★ . SUMMARISE

There are two types of Sleep Commands ( starters & triggers ) :

— Starters : help to think the body about falling asleep

— Triggers : indicates that the mind is probably asleep and grants the brain to put the body into sleep paralysis

If you ignore the signals your body sends you ( roll over signal ,… ) you end up in a sleep paralysis!

It doesn’t matter if your body is tense, ; your mind unfocused- filled with thoughts or empty — your body will still go one way or another in a sleep paralysis ! ( patience is key ! )

Sleep triggers ( eye movements , pause breathing, muscle twitching… ) can help to trick your mind even faster and help to erase any doubt of your mind , to induce a full paralysis !

You don’t need any method to induce sleep paralysis, but it can help !

⋆⋆⋆ good luck !

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 other cool sleep paralysis posts !

++ her entire acc

[limitlessgoddess]

your guide to manifesting your desires in 2024.

i have manifested getting into my dream college, straight As every semester, visiting NYC, and a HUGE glow up (nourished hair, clearer skin, beautiful body, pretty face, emotional intelligence, baddie mindset, and supportive friends + family) in 2022. here's all the things i did that worked for me! i understand everything does not work the same for everyone, for example i find visualization fun and easy to do while affirming, even though natural to me, seems like work to me so i use it as an aid to fuel my visualization. i have had bad mental health days but i persisted in my desires regardless because i know i always get everything i want. 

1. understanding yourself and your thought processes:

this is not necessary for you to manifest what you want but it helps in creating self-awareness in the long term. i used to overthink a lot (manifested it away) so i affirmed and visualized during any free time i had, and eventually my doubts faded away. even if they pop up sometimes, i'm just like meh that's not true and brush them aside. for me, processing all my complicated emotions is essential to me because i get to know my patterns and start working on changing them. it does not matter what triggered them, you've to live with them for the rest of your life if you don't feel them and let them go.

2. discovering new things:

you should get out of your comfort zone. there are thousands of things in the world you haven't experienced. desires can change and you aren't obligated to stick to this one dream when something else lights up the fire inside you in the present. i had the dream of living in NYC for a long term but I became more open to DC, LA, Philadelphia, and other cities after visiting them. i have explored new hobbies too and they've become an important part of me now. being adaptable is important!

3. never settle:

a dream might be small for someone while the same dream might be unattainable for someone else. it's all about persisting in your desires and making them seem attainable to your subconscious. you don't have to lift a finger to manifest, so why aren't you being stubborn about what you want? why are you settling for less when you deserve to have so much more? don't settle for bread crumbs when you can have a WHOLE DAMN LUXURIOUS MEAL.

4. self-concept:

the qualities i find most attractive in a person are communication, efforts, dedication, honesty, and loyalty. so i start affirming for those qualities in myself! i embody them by telling myself, "i am dedicated, honest, and loyal", "i am irreplaceable and unforgettable just because i exist", "i communicate and put in efforts for the people who have the greatest in mind for me." we love people who are secure in themselves and so, we naturally gravitate towards them. i don't care if someone has a pretty body or a pretty face. if they have the drive to succeed in what they're doing and they're giving me princess treatment, i'd immediately fold. it's the inner qualities that stay in the longer term (though you can forever be ageless and youthful, but to complement that you need a beautiful mind and heart - those make you more attractive). 

[primofate]

Confessions Series - Part 1: Overheard [Genshin Impact Male Characters]

Note: Welp I had the itch to write again so here I am. Though sleep deprived because baby keeps waking up every 3 hours to feed... I wanted to do this haha. Based on @soulprompts “I love you” prompts. What other character should I do?

Warnings: haven’t written in a while please excuse and tell me about pronoun slips, I’m sleep deprived, not proofread, some are just concepts of liking someone, having a crush on them, while some are full blown love confessions. SOME ARE ANGSTY, chose only the male characters I wanted to write for instead of forcing myself to do all of them.

Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Itto, Kaeya, Scaramouche, Xiao, gn!reader  

Other works in this series: (Part 2 - Description)

Scenario: Talking to a friend about how you feel about him. Unbeknownst to you, he was listening, hidden round the corner. What does he do?

Aether

“He’s sweet,” You simply answer when asked what you like about Aether. “I mean, he’s a simple guy. He’s not a mystery, it’s not hard to read him nor to get along with him. I guess that’s one of the reasons why a lot of people like him.” 

“Uhuh,” your friend drawls, their head lazily resting on their hand. “but you don’t just like Aether. You seriously LIKE him,” 

You’re rendered speechless by the statement for a second, tripping over your first words, “Well--I mean--” and as if realizing you’re making a fool of yourself by speaking in garbles, you recover. “Yeah, I guess...” You don’t know why you admit to it, but it’s not like your friend didn’t already know.

What he does:

Is tempted to immediately walk up to you and reconfirm the conversation.

Stops himself for a minute and replays the whole conversation in his head, probably once, twice and maybe a third time.

Second guesses himself, but when he finally goes through all possible options, he realizes there’s no mistaking the overheard confession.

All the while, Paimon is nagging him to go talk to you. “You didn’t hear wrong! Stop thinking too much, hurry and go!” Ends up being pushed out into the open by his flying companion.

“Erm...Ahem” he coughs into his fist. “I...didn’t mean to eavesdrop...Y/N, sorry, but... can we continue this conversation somewhere else? Somewhere...a little more private?” and the shy smile he gives you is a tell tale sign that he had most likely felt the same.

Albedo

“His schedule is always busy. He has his hands full with Klee, on top of all the work he needs to do,” was your excuse to your friend when asked why you haven’t confessed to the alchemist yet. “I don’t think Albedo has time for this type of thing, you know? He doesn’t need a distraction.”

What he does:

His logical side agrees that he doesn’t need a distraction.

But the other part of him doesn’t mind if its you.

Pauses for a moment, thinks about it for a second, before confronting you about it just minutes later.

“...Schedules can be made flexible, Y/N,” you jump at his sudden voice. “Just as distractions...can sometimes be a good thing,” Albedo stretches a hand out to you. “...Care to test how good of one you can be to me?” 

Alhaitham

“Y/N, Alhaitham is FAR from stupid. There’s no way he hasn’t figured out that you have a crush on him,”

“Shush!!” You swerve around to your friend, ducking a little, as if that would help you become invisible. “People could be listening, besides, if that’s true, then it’s even worse. It means that he knows, and probably has no interest in me, so let’s just forget about it, ok?” 

What he does:

..................................No he doesn’t know. Sure he’s smart but............he could be dense when it came to these things. That, or he just didn’t know what to do.

Does not confront you about it immediately. In fact he turns around and walks away without being spotted, opting to think about his next steps instead of just rushing into the conversation.

Lo and behold a few days later he’ll show up in front of you with his usual stoic expression.

“Y/N,” he starts, and you freeze on the spot, looking up at him, blinking. 

“Y-Yes?” You haven’t seen nor heard from him in days and as usual, you attributed it to him being busy. Little did you know that he had been mulling over how to talk to you.

“I heard your conversation with (your friend) the other day,” straightforward was his answer to everything, even in this particular situation. 

It takes you a few seconds to internalize his words. You’re not even sure which conversation he means. You talk to (your friend) a lot. Your brows start to furrow in confusion, until he clarifies. 

“...I wouldn’t say that I completely have no interest in you,” he starts, and your shoulders tense up, now realizing which conversation it was. You could feel your cheeks start to burn, all you wanted to do was run away. 

Alhaitham holds back a sigh, “...Anyway, here is no place to talk about this... I’ll meet you at Puspa Cafe tonight, if you’re free,” 

You’re FAR from stupid too, and knew exactly what he was trying to do.

Ayato

“Besides why would the Lord Commissioner even look at someone like me?” you hiss at your friend who was trying to persuade you that Ayato also had the hots for you. It just seemed a little delusional to you.

“He takes the chance to rile you up every time he sees you. He’s obviously doing it on purpose,” your friend counters. You roll your eyes up to high heaven.

“He does that to everyone...” you conclude, knowing that Ayato had the habit of--though you don’t know if intentionally--giving his servants a scare. 

“Alright, alright, you don’t have to be so jealous,” your friend quips back, you send them a quick glare before going back to doing your own work.

What he does:

Doesn’t even bat an eye. Smirks as he hears the whole story. 

Confidently reveals his presence to the two of you, chuckling.

“Jealousy doesn’t usually paint a beautiful colour,” he starts, the overly pleasant smile on his face. You straighten up immediately, eyes changing into saucers when you realize he had heard the whole thing. You open your mouth to explain, but he beats you to it.

“But I must say it looks a little different on you, Y/N, almost charming,” The side of his lip quirks up the slightest bit into a subtle grin. You bite your lip, there he is again trying to rile you up, maybe (your friend) was right. 

“...Is there anything I can do for you Lord Commissioner?” you ask, trying to stray away from the subject. He only chuckles. 

“You’ll find that there are a LOT of things you can do for me, Y/N. Start by accompanying me to tea, hm?” He wasn’t really asking, it was almost a command. 

You wished your friend snickering on the side would just shut up.

Cyno

“...He’s a little intimidating don’t you think? I don’t know why you like him so much,” your friend comments, slacking off on their pile of paperwork. You roll your eyes at them. 

“Maybe because he works hard, unlike other people,” you shake your head a little. 

“As General Mahamatra he’s supposed to work hard. Just admit that you have weird tastes.” your friend counters, still procrastinating on their share of work.

“Okay, so what if he’s a little vicious in his ways? He’s just doing his job. Now, it would help me if you started doing yours as well,” 

What he does:

Doesn’t know what to do.

Stands hidden for quite a long time. The subject has already moved on and away from him.

Torn between revealing himself now or later. 

Can’t think properly so exits from the situation and comes back later that same day, when you’re still working with your friend.

As he approaches your table, your friend notices him first. (Your friend) nudges you with their elbow, tilting their chin up to let you know that someone was approaching. 

You pick your head up, and feel yourself go rigid when you see that it’s Cyno. At first you think to yourself that he might not be here to talk to you, maybe he’s just about to walk by...but he stops in front of your table and you’re left to wordlessly look up at him.

There’s a moment of silence that seemed to stretch on forever.

“...I value the high praise that you give me,” he starts and you immediately want to duck under the table and hide.

He heard. 

“O-Oh, G-General Mahamatra, you heard that...It’s...nothing, hard work deserves to be praised...” you avert your gaze down to the papers you were working on, pretending to continue and be busy with them. 

There was an awkward pause, your eyes darting up towards him for a second, checking if he was still looking at you, before breaking away again and furiously flipping through papers.

“...Do you want to play some TCG?” 

“Huh?” You end up with an incredulous look on your face, trying to gauge if he was serious. His face is still blank, but the usual tenseness in the way he carried himself gave way for a barely seen relaxation. It was hard to spot, but it was there. 

You ended up sighing a little in what you could only describe as relief, giving him a lopsided smile. “Sure, but go easy on me, I haven’t played in a while,”

“That’s fine. Perhaps a daily practice session will do you good,”

Dainsleif

“Mysterious, aloof, disappears into thin air... A man like that? You probably should stay away, Y/N. You don’t know what he dabbles in,” (Your friend) warns, looking at you with genuine concern. 

“Perhaps he has some secrets...but I don’t think he’s a bad guy at all. I’ve spent some time conversing with Dainsleif here and there,” you continue to wipe the tables, not noticing that the man you were talking about had long entered the tavern already and was now standing behind the two of you.

“At least he’s handsome, there’s that,” (Your friend) adds. 

“Sure, but that’s not the only reason I like him,” you laugh.

What he does:

Wonders if he heard the conversation right and overanalyzes what you mean by “like” him.

Either way it stirs a strange emotion in him, one that he hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

Prefers to get things over with and thinks there’s no harm in confronting you immediately.

You hear someone clear their throat behind you. Thinking that it was a customer you turn around with a pleasant smile, only for it to slowly dwindle down into a shocked expression.

Dainsleif.

“Y/N,” he nods his head towards you casually. You gulp, force a smile, and nod back. “Hi, you’re early today,” just as your friend slips away from the conversation. Dainsleif doesn’t even spare them a glance.

He doesn’t have much to say about your comment of him being early. He doesn’t particularly know why he was early today either. Perhaps...fate would have him hear the conversation between you and (Your friend).

“Yes, well, it looks like there were benefits to being early today,” he meets you eye to eye, the intensity in his gaze almost makes you blush from your neck all the way up to the top of your head, but you fought the giddiness back. 

“...What can I get you?” there’s a shiver that threatens to run up your spine, wondering if your deflection was successful. Dainsleif closes his eyes momentarily, before opening them with a strange sense of courage. 

“Your company,”

Diluc

“It’s been years,” (Your friend) says, the two of you looking up at the massive oak tree of Windrise. They glance at you from the side of their eye before continuing. “Are you still in love with Diluc?”

There’s a breeze that passes, almost melancholic, and partly whispered of sorrow. “...I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving him.” You pick your hand up to rub at your arm. “Jean, Kaeya, Diluc and I...So many things have changed since we were kids...but I don’t think that spot for Diluc will ever go away,”

“Does he know, at least?” (Your friend) asks and you half scoff. 

“I’m not sure, I get the feeling he does, but doesn’t act on it. Which is why...maybe the only way to solve this emptiness is to leave Mondstadt altogether.” 

“Out of sight, out of mind huh?” (Your friend) claps your back, and turns around to start walking away with you.

What he does:

Internally a mess of emotions. Doesn’t know where to start. 

but he’s just standing there and he’s stuck watching (your friend) and you turn around to come face to face with him. 

He looks at you, a wave of memories and emotions flashing through his mind all at once, it almost overwhelms him. 

“D-Diluc,” you stutter, heart freezing in your chest. You see him take a steadying breath in, prying his gaze away from you and over to (Your friend).

“(Your friend), could you give us a minute?” he asks. (Your friend) obliges, passing you a quick glance before going ahead on their own. Another breeze runs by, ruffling his long red hair. 

“...I didn’t mean for you to hear that,” you start, and yet he doesn’t say anything, prompting you to continue talking. “...You don’t have to think about it too much, it’s just silly--”

“I wasn’t sure,” he cuts you off, eyes drawn to the ground now. “I wasn’t sure...if you really felt that way.” 

The statement somehow exasperates you. “You weren’t sure? All those times I stayed by your side when everyone else left--” then it hits you. “Or were you scared, Diluc?”

The quick grimace in his expression tells you the answer. His reply comes a few seconds later, “I was, I still am,” but he picks his head up, and finally looks you straight in the eye. “...but this time...” his fists clench on his side. “This time give me the chance to show you how much I really care about you,”

He was not going to lose you too.

Itto

“Seriously?! Itto? Arataki Itto? Are you for real?” (Your friend) announces to nearly half of the food stall, the other customers swerving around to look at the two of you. 

"Oh, say it a bit louder why don’t you?” You roll your eyes at your friend and continue eating.”

“Sorry. I just--Out of all the people you could choose, your huge crush is on that big brute??” your can tell by the look on your friend’s face that they think you have weird tastes.

What he does:

Butts in without even thinking of the conversation. Has no clue what’s going on.

“Crush?!”

You and your friend startle, swerving around to see none other than the oni with his hands on his hips. “Y/N?! You planning on crushing me?!” then he guffaws with laughter, slapping his knees in the process. “Yeah right, you’re no match for me!”

Your previously gaped open mouth slowly closes and your shoulders relax, sighing. You’re a little disappointed he doesn’t get it at all. Your friend shakes their head with a long sigh. “You stupid oaf, we don’t mean it that way...” 

Itto’s head tilts sideways, a genuinely confused look on his face. “No? Then... Watcha all talkin about?” 

You grab your friend’s arm and pull them forward the slightest bit. “It’s not important! Actually, we better get going--”

“Y/N has a CRUSH on you, idiot! Y/N LIKES you!” Your friend explodes, patience long gone. 

Itto blinks at the confession, his eyes darts towards you, “...Oh,” then there’s the slight tugging at his chest, he can’t help but beam and smile silly. “Yeah? You’re not too bad yourself Y/N! I like you too!”

You’re not sure if he really understood the confession in its entirety. 

Kaeya

“It’s all just fun and games with Kaeya. It doesn’t mean anything,” you laugh sheepishly, yet you rub the back of your neck a little.

“...Do you want it to be just fun and games?” your friend chides, and there’s a moment of silence. The two of you just sitting there already knowing the answer, it’s almost uncomfortable, until your friend sighs. 

“...Let’s change the subject,” 

What he does: 

responds immediately. Will not wait a second longer to come out of his hiding place and ask about what he just heard.

“How about let’s not?” Kaeya emerges out of nowhere, slipping into the seat next to you at the cafe. His poise is confident and instantly his head lazily places itself into the palm of his hand, gaze lingering at you. 

“Snowflake, I had no idea you felt like that,” his voice is smooth like ice and you bite your lip to keep yourself from saying something stupid.

“...I didn’t say anything though?” you countered, trying to evade the conversation. Your friend watches on with interest. 

“Silence speaks volumes, Y/N,” Kaeya scoots even closer to you, your shoulders touching each other. However, he maneuvers his arm around to lay on the seat behind you. “So if you’re opposed to what I’m about to do, better speak up,”

He leans closer, inch by inch, he waits for you to say something.

You stay silent.

He grins.

Scaramouche

“Hat guy? He’s brutal. But who am I to comment on your tastes, Y/N. You’ve always been weird,” (Your friend) chides, watching as you go over the bookshelf again. 

“Stop calling him that,” You murmur under your breath, more focused on finding the right book for your research. “That’s not his only distinctive feature, you know,” you continue, still engrossed in looking for a book.

“Oh? What else are his “distinctive features”?” (Your friend) drawls, rolling their eyes. 

You hum a little, then plop on the ground cross-legged, wanting to get a better look on the last row of books of the Akademiya’s library. “...His eyes,” you simply answer. “They’re a beautiful shade of violet-blue...He’s always glaring at someone half of the time but he actually has very pretty eyes,” 

There’s silence and you finally get the peace you need to concentrate. However, that silence is broken by a voice that you know all too well.

What he does:

is amused.

thinks its cute pathetic.

will still look angry but will have a hard time actually being angry.

will be cocky.

“My eyes, huh?”

It’s hard to completely turn around in your sitting position, so you do the best you can to turn, side eye landing on Scaramouche’s form. He has his arms crossed as usual, but there’s a smug smirk on his face. “Didn’t know it was that fascinating to you, bookeater,”

It was supposed to be an insulting nickname for you, who always had your nose in a book, but you took no offense to it at all.

You didn’t know what to say, so you continued staring at him. He being the anti-social person that he was, just stared back. There was a big gap of silence before he felt that it was becoming too awkward. 

“...What’re you looking for?” he blurted out.

“...A book...”

“Are you stupid? Of course you’re looking for a book. I meant what’s the title?” There his usual sneer was back again and he unfolded his arms to look at you unimpressively. 

“...A History of Inazuma: Volume 2...” you meekly replied, slowly realizing that he actually heard you praising him.

“You’re in the wrong section,” the exasperated sigh he gives out causes you to wince, and you turn away back to the bookshelf as if to shield you from all this embarrassment. 

“If it’s about Inazuma, you should just be asking me,” you blink as your peripheral catches sight of an outstretched hand. You tilt your head to see that he’s offering his hand, but his face is blank.

“...Well? Come on. I don’t have all day,”

You bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling, something about the way he said it sounds threatening, but also slightly playful. But that’s just the way he was. 

You accept his hand, and he pulls you up easily.

Xiao

“Oh so that’s why you’re coming over more frequently...” (Your friend) grins, and you wave your hands around to tell them to quiet down. Adepti had good hearing after all.

“Well, I’m also coming over cause Verr Goldet needs more help these days in the kitchen. You guys are getting so much customers these days that Yanxiao has a hard time by himself,”

“Uhhuuhhhhhh, sure...was it also Verr Goldet who told you to try and master the Almond Tofu recipe from Yanxiao? Cause you’re awfully hell bent on trying to learn that recipe, according to Yanxiao,” 

You fall silent, feeling heat crawling up your neck. “I--” You start, searching for an excuse, but realized there was no escaping this one. “I just want to do something nice for Xiao, that’s all,” you innocently quip. “I...I know I can’t help him much, but maybe just cooking his favourite dish will help, even a little,”

(Your friend) smiles a little, knowing that the adepti probably heard everything. “That’s nice of you, Y/N. You must care about him a lot,” 

What he does:

once upon a time he would do absolutely nothing. because getting involved with humans is something he shouldn’t do.

But now he bides his time, and observes if it’s safe to open up. 

He wouldn’t outright thank you at first, but he’ll slowly show up in front of you a little more everyday.

He’s rather awkward, so at first he only nods his head as thanks when you leave the bowl of almond tofu on the ledge.

Eventually when he realizes you’re not going to stop cooking for him he goes the extra mile to do something simple for you too.

He places a stalk of your favourite flower on the ledge, right before you come to put down his bowl of almond tofu. 

I’ve published The Ruthless Prince (Reader x Scaramouche) on paperback. Check it out here:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BVD1VVFP

Consider supporting me to read some exclusive fics:

https://ko-fi.com/primofate

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Masterlist

https://primofate.tumblr.com/post/653296890583154688/masterlist-for-mobile-version-main-links

[bucks-babe]

Not Like This

Summary: A night at the bar doesn’t go the way Bucky or you ever thought

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: established relationship, Bucky trying to get Steve a date, angst, attempted drugging with the intention of SA (nothing happens though), mentions of a knife/stabbing (doesn’t happen), smut, but like angsty smut not the sexy smut, Bucky being a huge idiot, lack of communication, dub-con/bordering non-con at times, degradation, oral m!rec, subspace, manhandling, very mean Bucky, safeword being called, crying, spanking, self-hatred, insecurities, self-reflection, aftercare, scared Bucky and reader, overstepping boundaries, communication at the end, some fluff

A/N: This is my gift to @buckys-wintersoldier for her birthday! This fic contains topics that maybe sensitive to some people. This is your last warning. You are responsible for your own media consumption. Updates are posted to my side blog @bucks-babesideblog

“This is getting hard to watch, Buck.” You grimace and turn your head towards your boyfriend. Steve stands on the dancefloor in a futile attempt to talk to the girl he’s been eyeing up for the past hour and a half. Bucky takes another swig of his beer before meeting your eyes with the same grimace. “ You should go and help him.”

“And what am I supposed to do, doll?” Bucky leans back in the booth, left arm resting behind your head as he whispers in your ear. A shiver passes through your body and your thighs clench involuntarily. His scent mixes with the faint smell of his last beer and the crowded bar’s sweaty stench.

“Go play wingman, apparently you were great at it in the 40’s.” You playfully nudge him away, mostly because you can’t think straight when he’s pressed so close to you, your body craves his already and you don’t need to make it any harder for yourself. “While you’re at it, I’ll get myself another drink.”

Bucky grumbles as you stand up without giving him a kiss. “Make sure you put it on my tab, doll.”

You giggle as you spin around to face him, dress swaying as you do so. “You know I will, hotstuff.” You take your seat at the bar and signal for the bartender, turning around to watch Bucky try and get Steve a date. You thank him as he places your drink down, but before you can get up, another man seats himself in the stool right next to yours.

“Hello, gorgeous.” At first you don’t realize that he’s talking to you, too caught up in the way Bucky’s muscles flex as he gestures to Steve. “I say, you’ve caught my eye tonight. Mind if I ask your name? I’m Jake.” It dawns on you that he wasn’t talking to anyone else, only you.

As you go to turn around to decline his horrible attempt at flirting, you see him slip a pill into your open drink out of the corner of your eye, so fast that none of the other patrons nor the bartender saw, but you did. Ice shoots through your veins. He tried to drug you. What do you do now? Leave? That would look suspicious. Call the bartender and say that it wasn’t the right drink? No, he heard your specific order.

“Umm,” you trail off. At first you were gauging how far you would have to run to make it to Bucky, but then you saw the pocket knife bulging out from underneath the man’s shirt. “Sorry, I’m here with my boyfriend.” Good, let him know I’m not alone.

“Him? Well he seems quite friendly with the lady in blue over there.” You don’t turn to look, not trusting to take your eyes off of him. “If I were him, we wouldn’t even have made it to the bar when you’re wearing a number like that.” He lets out a low whistle, eyes hungrily raking up and down your body.

You want to yell out for anyone to come over, but you’re too scared when you know that he has a knife. Yes, Bucky is a super soldier, but Jake could stab you faster than Bucky could reach you. “We have an open relationship actually.” Open relationship, really? Why would I fucking say that?

“So you’re telling me that I have a chance.” His beatty eyes lock in on your cleavage and you shift around uncomfortably. “Why don’t you have a sip of your drink? You seem pretty tense over there.” You pick up your drink with shaky hands before bringing the straw to your lips. You pretend to take a small sip which makes Jake smile, showing off his smoke stained teeth. “There you go, good girl.” Where the hell is Bucky? Come on, please come back.

You’re practically shaking in fear as his sweaty palm lands on your knee, creeping up to your thigh. Behind you resides Bucky who has overheard most of the conversation. Anger doused his entire body. He didn’t see Jake drug your drink or how scared you were, too caught up in your words. Open relationship? Letting him call you good girl? Touching you?

You almost shriek when Bucky’s metal hand grabs your wrist, pulling you away, but you instantly relax when you notice that Bucky’s come to save you. The fear still lingers under the surface but it feels like you can breathe without a heavy weight on your chest. “Thank god, Bucky. I-” He cuts you off as he spins around, flesh hand wrapping around your neck.

“Thank what? I leave you for five minutes and you turn into a little slut, huh?” Your eyes widen. There’s no way that he thinks that you wanted to even talk to that man at the bar. Before you can answer he lets your neck go and continues to drag you along. “Keep your fucking mouth shut. You want to be a little slut,” he pushes you into the passenger seat of his car before slamming the door and getting in the driver seat. “Then you can keep your mouth stuffed with my cock.”

He doesn’t even look at you as he slides his jeans and boxers down just enough to free his semi hard cock. He doesn’t see the tears welling up, or how you’re silently begging for him to comfort you, hug you. To tell you that everything is going to be okay, you’re safe and he loves you, but no, Bucky is furious at you.

You feel yourself start to slip into subspace, the fear of your previous situation in addition to Bucky’s harsh words have you floating off into space. You want to please him, show him that he’s the only one you want, but you also don’t want to have sex right now. Either way, he grabs the back of your head and forces you down on his cock before slamming his foot on the gas, making you lurch in the car.

“Keep your fucking head right there. You’re gonna let me use you however the fuck I want since you seem to think that you’re not mine and I’m not yours. You really fucking think that I would want another pussy? Another mouth? Oh, shit. Choke on that fat cock. Think Jake can fill up your mouth like this?” For just one moment, you forgot about Jake, about what could have happened to you, but at the mention of his name you try to pull off, suddenly not wanting to have your boyfriend’s cock in your mouth.

“Don’t fucking run away from me. Never gonna share this perfect body. Shit, can feel you slobbering on my nuts. Bet you fucking like it too, being my little cocksucker.” No, you don’t like it, at least right now. I just want you to hold me.

“You’re so fucking good at this. Already gonna cum, ready? Fuck, gonna make me crash the fucking car just from some head. K-keep going, shit.” Tears stream down your face, partially from all your emotions bubbling over and partially from the brutal facefucking. His flesh hand grips the back of your neck and rails your head, spit and tears everywhere, makeup completely ruined, black streaks running down your face.

He cums with a shout, balls pulsing on your cheek where he holds you down. The breaks squeak as he pulls into your shared driveway, ripping you away from his dick. “You look fucking pathetic right now. Trying to get another man’s cock and then gobbling down mine it’s your only purpose.” You can’t find any love in his eyes, only rage and lust. More tears fall down your cheeks.

“B-b-buc-” You try to speak but your voice is hoarse from his cock ramming down your throat.

“Just get upstairs. On the bed, face down, ass up, naked.” If his jaw clenches anymore you’re sure he’ll break some teeth.

“Please, just let me-” He cuts you off again after you’re able to speak.

“Do what I said or else it’s gonna be much worse for you. I don’t take well to insolent whores.” Why can’t you see I need you?

Without another word, you head to the bedroom, trying to wipe away your makeup but only smearing it around even more. You don’t have any more fight left in you. All you want to do is forget the whole night, but you know that it’s nowhere near over. You do as you were told, grabbing the stuffie Bucky won for you at the carnival over a year ago and clutching it to your chest.

You gulp at the sound of Bucky’s clothes dropping to the floor. “Don’t make a sound.” It’s the only warning you get before his hand smacks against your ass, hard. You bite the stuffie, more and more tears falling from your eyes. He slaps your ass over and over again, no doubt leaving bruises. By the end, you’re so deep in subspace that all you want to do is please him.

It doesn’t matter that you don’t want to have sex, that what you want from him is his warmth and comfort. If you make him happy then he will take care of you after. You need to please him, make him proud of you. Just take the punishment. Don’t make him angrier.

Without warning, he slams into your cunt, driving in and out with no regard for your pleasure. He wasn’t trying to make you cum, and you could tell just based on his thrusts. He was using you to get himself off. This is what Jake planned on doing to me, isn’t it? You bite onto the stuffie harder. It hurts, but it feels so good. This is what I deserve.

He cums in your pussy but doesn’t stop moving. The added lubrication makes his thrusts easier and the pleasure starts to build in your stomach. Trying to hide your moans as you near the edge only for him to pull out and slap your ass again and again before railing you again. You try to reach a hand back, maybe to get him to slow down, maybe just because you needed to feel some sort of tenderness, but he only pushes your hand away.

Any thoughts of Jake leave your mind with every plunge of Bucky’s cock. You melt into the mattress, focusing on the pleasure Bucky’s bringing you. He loves me, that’s why he’s so mad. “Fuck, pussy’s so fucking good, never want to leave her. M’going to fuck this little cunt all night if I want to.” Do I want that? It feels so good, but I want him to cuddle me.

You can feel your orgasm build up in your stomach, threatening to burst at any moment. “Can I cum?” It’s the first words you’ve said since he started fucking you. For a fleeting second you think that he’ll pull out again and take your orgasm away, but he only fucks you harder, right hand coming down to your clit, rubbing harsh circles. It hurts in the best way, throwing you over the edge as you cream all over his dick.

“Good girl, no one else can make you cum like me, can they?”

Those two words take you right back to the bar, where the threat of what Jake could have done is still fresh. “RED!” Mid orgasm, your mind reels in fear. Bucky pulls out immediately, all the rage coursing through his body leaving at once. You collapse on the bed, curling into the fetal position, still clutching the stuffed animal to your chest as sobs take over your body.

Bucky shakes as he watches you fall apart. He has no idea what really happened at the bar but he knows that he pushed you too far. He replays every word and act that occurred in the past hour. How he didn’t let you talk, how you looked so small, like you were trying to curl into yourself, how he didn’t even look at you as he shoved his cock down your throat. All the names he called you, the roughness, the lack of care.

He tries to reach out to you, but you jerk away, sobbing harder. Panic swells in his chest. What did he do? How could he hurt the love of his life? Bucky gets off the bed and heads to the bathroom, getting a damp washcloth and walking over to your side of the bed, crouching down so that he is at eye level with you. “Doll?” You whimper in response yet meet his eyes. “Can I clean you up?” You give a small jerk of your head, all you can muster.

Bucky’s heart drops to his stomach as he sees your swollen cunt. He caused that. As gently as he can, he wipes away his cum and your juices before tossing the rag across the room and settling next to you, leaving space so that you can decide if you want to cuddle with him. You crave his warmth so you curl yourself into his side, sighing at the comfort his skin brings.

Self hatred licks at his spine. He wants to run away, not giving himself the chance to do anymore harm, but you need him and he can’t let you down again, not after what he did. Eventually, your sobs ebb and your tense body relaxes. “He tried to drug me.” You say it so quietly that if Bucky didn’t have enhanced hearing he wouldn’t have caught it.

He jolts away, ignoring your whimper at the loss of contact. The morsel of responsibility that was keeping him next to you vanishes. He treated you like a whore, thinking that you were flirting with another man, when in reality you were just trying to keep yourself safe. Bucky stands and paces the room, darker and darker thoughts run through his mind.

“He what?” Bucky can’t breathe, he can’t fathom what he just put you through after one of the worst experiences of your life just happened. You needed him and he wasn’t there in the way you needed.

You try to keep the tears at bay, but you can’t help it. “He slipped something in my drink when he thought I wasn’t looking. I was so scared and you were so far away. I-I didn’t know what to do. I thought if I stalled him long enough I would be okay until you came back.” You shrink into yourself again, the stuffies head tilted at an odd angle at the force you were applying.

“And then I, I let myself, I should have-” He can’t think straight. Anger flairs inside of him. At himself, at the man at the bar. “I’m so sorry.” Tears stream freely down his face as he rounds to where you lay, dropping to his knees.

“Please hold me.” Bucky jumps back into bed, he was fully ready for you to kick him out, hit him, make him beg on his knees for your forgiveness, but not for you to want him to touch you again, not after the pain and fear he inflicted. “I just want to be held, want you to love me.”

“I do love you, sweet girl. I love you so goddamn much it hurts. I shouldn’t have done that. I should have listened to you, should have seen how uncomfortable you were, but I was so caught up in my own head, that you were looking for someone else because I wasn’t good enough.” He hastily wipes his tears away before wrapping his arms around your frame. “And that is no excuse for what I did. I let my own insecurities blind me and I hurt you as a result.”

He trails off before speaking the words that he has been too scared to ask before, but he knows the answer to. “You didn’t want to have sex, did you?” It’s framed as a question, but he says it like a statement, because he knows that you didn’t. Not at the time, mostly because of his own rage, but if he would have thought about more than himself he would have.

“I wanted to please you, though. Thought if I took my punishment that you wouldn’t be mad at me anymore.” Bucky feels his heart break in two. You didn’t have to answer his question. His stomach churns at the fact that the only reason you went through with anything was because you thought that you needed to, for him to treat you the way you deserve, with love and devotion.

You don’t blame him, maybe it’s because you still are so deep in subspace, but either way, he’s taking care of you now. “You never have to do something you don’t want to do just because of me. You know that right?” Clearly, he made you feel like you had to.

“Please, it’s not just your fault. I could have tapped your leg three times, I could have said our safeword long before you fucked me.”

“But I didn’t even let you fucking talk.” You see the hurt in his eyes, not at you, but at himself.

“My hands were free. I could have tapped you at any time. This isn’t just on you. We both fucked up.”

“The only reason you didn’t was because you felt like you had to please me though.” Why is he so desperate to put all the blame onto himself?

“Partially, but also because I wanted to forget about what happened. I thought that if we had sex that your touch could wash away his. But when I knew it couldn't, I should have stopped you.” Both of your eyes were red and full of tears. “Neither of us are exempt from the blame, okay?”

Bucky nods his head, not fully believing you, but not wanting to fight about it. “Can we take a bath and cuddle? We can talk about it tomorrow. I just want to be held right now.” With shuddering breath, Bucky nods his head and picks you up, taking you to the bathroom to get the tub ready.

You both have to work to get past this, to understand what you both could have done better to prevent it from happening again, but you still trust Bucky with your life. There is no love or trust lost between the two of you. It happened and you can’t change that. You doubt that you’ll be going to any bars soon, and there’s going to be a lot of trauma that you’ll both have to work through. Him with his insecurities and you with how easy it would have been for someone to take advantage of you, how you didn’t communicate your needs. But you have Bucky and he has you, and he is going to do everything in his power to make this up to you, that this never happens again.