#everytime i see someone say that they arent good for each other im giving you a side eye. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

animatedrapture · 3 years

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I HAVE GASOLINE LAYING AROUND IN MY HOUSE AND IM OMW TO SET KANA ON FIRE :))))

ok im about to compile possibly like 10 chapters worth of kana hate KJHLDSDJS

so. sorry i wasnt able to respond to so manyyyyyy of these on time and all, i get overwhelmed super easily but i truly, truly love all of you and appreciate each msg :DD these have all either made me think real hard LMFOAHJSKD or had me laughing so hard and gasping lmfao. but yeah, i appreciate all of these and everything i mightve never gotten bc tumblr asks is dumb as well as the ones ive still yet to come back to or answer. almost each and every single one of these have been a guidance with what i wanted to do with the smau, whenever i wanted to switch something up or make something better in the smau, your msgs helped a lot in improving it in some way and helping me figure out what i truly wanted to do with the smau and for that, thank u!!!

Anonymous asked:

FUCK KANA ALL MY HOMIES HATE HER HANA SPILLED HER DRINK ON HER? SHE DID THE RIGHT THING ALSO FUCK SUNA BC EVEN UF HE HAD SEX WITH YN AND SAID HE ADORES HER HIS ACTIONS/AFFECTION TOWARDS KANA GIVES MIXED SIGNALS AND ITS TIME HE GET ACCOUNTABLE OF SAID ACTIONS sorry for the rant 🥴

Anonymous asked:

the “tw kana” absolutely sent me into orbit i cackled 😭

Anonymous asked:

anons bonding over kana hate🤝🏻🤝🏻🤝🏻

Anonymous asked:

yeah its only you who doesn't dislike her FGHDJGKUJ IM KIDDING no but really more than hate her its hate the way shes in between like it pisses me off the cockblock she is 😭😭

Anonymous asked:

if i were kana,,,i would either tell him i still have feelings OR hurt in silence (step back) since technically he or should i say they decided to be JUST bestfriends not cockblocking the possibility for him to be in a relationship

Anonymous asked:

kana has to make a choice: she confess or shut the fuck up bc as far as we know they decided to be just bff (highkey think suna was more into being just friends and kana kinda lied) so IF he likes someone else why the fuck try to sabotage him (his happiness with someone else) when he find it out then what? would he still keep her as a friend? 🧐

Anonymous asked:

What if I just...shift or whatever you guys call it, into As Friends universe...and bonk Kana on the head...lol just kidding...ah ha ha ha No please she is starting to sound like the girl best friend that would make couples break up because she does not care about boundaries...honey, you're the best friend, yes, you're important, but that's his girlfriend...stay in your lane. Lol like "I don't want to confess" but "He's mine so I have to get rid of all competitions" lol fucking clown yeah no, I don't have to wait for you to write more about her to make me hate her sksksksksk I already do

Anonymous asked:

Ayo istg kana's been giving y/n the stinky eye... if she stares at y/n like that one more time LAWD HELP HER SOUL, im coming for her eyes!!! But fr,, Rin better treat y/n right and put kana in her place. Bc y/n got a best friend too (samu) u^u and he can cook and would treat her good.

Anonymous asked: likE I KEEP SAYING eAT SHIT KANA

Anonymous asked: I am CRAVING IMMENSE VIOLENCE bring that girl kana here lemme knock her teeth down her throat. >:(

Anonymous asked:

kana (derogatory)

Anonymous asked:

istg if a bus doesn’t hit kana i’m gonna do it

Anonymous asked:

kana toxic best friend it’s time for suna to realise IT 😤😤

Anonymous asked:

kana has family problems only rin knows about? what in the ao haru ride manga 😐

Anonymous asked:

WHY KANA FUKC

Anonymous asked:

NAH MY GUT FEELING TELLING ME KANA WAS BAD NEWS SINCE THE BEGINNING also she wants suna all to herself (he sees her as a bff) but doesn’t say shit to him... if course he’s gonna find someone in the future whether in college or after (unless the bitch will still to his ass even when he goes pro)

Anonymous asked:

everyday i wake up with notifs from u i feel like im about to get subjected to pain and IM RIGHT THIS TIME TOO what the hell kana u will never be yn (me) 🙏🏼🧇

Anonymous asked:

bro part of me wants to punch suna so bad bc like hes so awkward but so smooth like who tf do u want stop being a smooth ass mf u know these two bitches like u

Anonymous asked: i might just obliterate everyone named kana cause of as friends THE WHOLE TIME MY EYE WAS TWITCHING CAUSE OF HER FUCK KDDSKDLSDK EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO OBLITERATE HER SAY "I" but like hi! i hope youre well

Anonymous asked:

even tho u always insist you'd never het mad at me girl HUHH i used to be genuinely good w kana now she's just a manipulative bitch :// kana babe sorry but ur best friend is allowed to spend time with other people 🙄

xmyshya asked:

I 👏 love 👏 Hana 👏 Also 👏 fuck 👏 Kana 👏 and Rin you idiot, what do you mean he's not gonna pursue dating T_T it's just a few chapters till the end T_T wut T_T

yourstarvic asked:

Kana needs to back up before she gets beat up 😤 me and my homies ain’t playing no more 😤

Anonymous asked:

omg that ur probably mad (even tho u said u’d never get mad at me!) broooo

Anonymous asked:

kana gonna get even more territorial in the next chapters im getting kinda scared to see how rin reacts 😒 shes gonna lowkey (highkey) manipulate rin like oh u said youll never leave me you said i come first and all that mhmmm girl dont make me break your neck 👎🏼👎🏼

Anonymous asked:

huh so is kana basically a pick me girl

Anonymous asked:

“you’d be selfish abt this” girl

Anonymous asked:

why tf kana gotta ask yn bro u don't know her just ask suna directly 🙄 putting her in an awkward ass position how's she supposed to say no i'm sorry kana's being annoying as hell rn

Anonymous asked:

it’s time for kana to realise: - yn aint just a fling bc suna is spending more time with her - suna clearly sees her just as his bff

Anonymous asked:

Kana saying "I was worried you'd be selfish about this haha" well bitch now I gotta be 😒

Anonymous asked:

“i was worried you’d be selfish about this hahaha” -the one who’s for the streets kana better watch herself…y/n was being kind, i will not be

Anonymous asked:

DID KANA REALLY HAVE THE NERVE TO ASK US?????? TO POSTPONE OUR PLANS WITH RIN???? pls that « you understand, right? » was just so manipulative oh my god-

Anonymous asked:

kana can go cry & write to her diary about it 😘😘

Anonymous asked:

“y/n right?” after literally meeting her plssss

Anonymous asked:

miss kana is just gonna have to miss him a little more bc i'm not canceling SHIT!!

Anonymous asked:

kana is playing chess while we’re playing checkers

Anonymous asked:

everytime you post and kana gets fucked over my day is made and it all I'm going to think about

Anonymous asked:

im catching up on as friends bc i havent read a few chapters and kana saying “arent you just with yn” made me extra angry go trip down some stairs kana

Anonymous asked:

u made my week with the update 😭🖤 i hate kana sfm lol

Anonymous asked:

kana suffering either way the story goes? I'm in -🦄

Anonymous asked:

kana n suna need to grow up lowkey it’s very highschool

Anonymous asked:

WHOEVER SENT THIS I AM CHOOSING VIOLENCE who's in, let's go beat kana-🦄

Anonymous asked:

hELL YEAAHH GET FUCKED KANA /neg

#wait im adding more i just #it noncon posted KLDHSKJDD #;bubble #smau ; as friends #tw kana #this is gonna be like the tw kana hall of fame post LKJDSHKDJS

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princessjungeun · 4 years

Text

Falling For You: Dami x Reader

Request: Can I request a Dreamcatcher scenario for Dami, where y/n is a member of another girl group and is known to have a crush on Dami, so one day at an award show her members find Dami and bring her to y/n which results in y/n blushing and stuttering like crazy but little did her members know that Dami actually liked her back and ends up asking her out. Thank you I hope I explained ok, your work is really good.

Y/N is in a made up group

Award show season was in full swing and your group had been invited to the Golden Disk Awards. This was one of the biggest music shows you could be invited to. Your group was still fairly new, only having debuted 18 months ago. Despite this the 7 of you have broke more records than any other group in the entire industry.

The seven of you sat in the van, talking amongst yourselves. “So are you excited? I cant believe Im gonna see Twice and IZ*ONE in the same place!!” Your maknae, Jian, bounced up and down excitedly.

From the front of the van one of your other members shouted “I BET Y/N IS EXCITED THAT DREAMCATCHER WILL BE THERE! ARENT YOU Y/N?” Sending a glare her way you responded “I’m not just excited to see them, Loona will be there too...plus IDLE.”

“Yeah but you loveeeeee Dami. It’s always “she’s so hot” “can i marry her!”Jian laughed as she imitated your voice.

Pushing her on the arm you scolded “oh hush up that’s not true! And if anything you’re all over Wonyoung. Everytime you see her you’re always like “she’s so beautiful I want her number!!”

Your members continued to tease you about the huge crush you had on Dami, while you did your best to tune them out.

When you all arrived you felt the nerves set in. Although you didn’t exactly know if you were going to meet anyone, you were going to see some of your favorite idols up close.

Walking the red carpet was fine, you didn’t fall and embarrass yourself like you thought you would. The talking part of interviews were handled by the older members much to your relief as well.

However you went into a full panic when you realized your group was sitting directly next to Dreamcatcher. Your sunbaes were already in their seats when you arrived and the only way to get to your seats, was to walk past them. Like directly in front of them.

Your eyes locked on Dami as your members slowly filed through. Quickly you looked away before she was able to catch you staring. All of your members were clearly trying to stifle their laughter as they could tell by your silence that you were in fact panicking inside. Approaching JiU you smiled, trying your best not to look scared and star struck all at the same time. A small giggle left her lips and what sounded like a “cute” filled your ears as she saw the iron grip you had on Jian’s hand.

As you passed Dami you absolutely avoided all eye contact. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed the way her eyes followed you until you sat down with your group. For the first hour you could feel her eyes on you.

“I have to pee...come with me at the next break please.” Jian whispered to you, her leg bouncing on the ground indicating that she’d been trying to hold off on getting up for a while.

You responded “can’t you ask one of the others....i don’t wanna walk past-”

Jian whined “please please...just come on. I can’t go alone.” At times like this you were reminded that although she was in a group full of legal adults, she was still the baby.

She puppy eyed you and just like that you gave in. After five minutes there was finally a fifteen minute break as camera crews moved around and started to get ready for the next performances.

Jian immediately got up, practically sprinting past Dreamcatcher to get to the bathroom. You sighed deeply realizing that you’d have to pass your seven idols, one of them being your crush, alone.

You just decided to rip off the bandage and walk over, knowing your leader would get upset if you let the 15 year old out of sight by herself.

Doing your best to not step on them given the small amount of space. With a smile they moved out of the way for you, Siyeon stopping you to tell you how beautiful you looked.

When you made it to the bathroom Jian was already finished and washing her hands. You decided to just go ahead and use the bathroom as well, knowing the awards show wouldn’t have another break for a while.

When you came out of the stall Jian was fixing her hair and dress making sure she looked good as you washed your hands. As you dried you hands she stepped in front of you to open the door, giggling softly to herself as she waited for you to walk out.

The two of you started walking back down the hallways towards the stairs which led back to the open arena. Just as you both turned the corner and started walking down the stairs you felt yourself trip. Jian didn’t react fast enough to catch you, but luckily someone else did.

“Are you okay?” The person holding you asked. Your eyes widened realizing who the voice belonged to before even looking up. Internally you hoped and prayed it wasn’t who you thought it would be. But the second you made eye contact, you saw it was her.

You stared at her for a moment before she nodded her head prompting you for an answer. Hoping you didn’t sound stupid you asked “I’m sorry what?” She smiled and said “I asked if you were okay.”

You tried your best to put together a sentence but all the cane out was “i’m- you know uh uh yes just- i mean...um. Yes.”

Now was when you realized not only you were still holding onto her, one arm draped over her shoulder. But she also had a hand placed on your waist, the other on the small of your back.

The two of you just stood there not saying anything, just looking at each other. Jian craned her neck down the stairwell before shouting to someone who was a few steps behind Dami.

“Yuna?! Oh my gosh let’s catch up!” Jian ran down the stairs excitedly to meet her schoolmate. The girl called back up “Y/N just hang out with Dami, I’ll see you later!” Her excited shouts snapped you out of your trance.

“I’m so sorry I’m just gonna-” You turned to leave thinking you’d embarrassed yourself enough. Dami grabbed yourself arm, “wait, come with me we have ten more minutes.”

Not wanting to be rude you smiled softly and allowed her to take your hand as she guided you back upstairs. She linked arms with you as you both wandered the empty hallways. Once you warmed up to her you found yourself less nervous, talking about whatever popped into your minds.

When the two of you returned to your seats all of your members were quick to bombard you with questions. You just smiled to yourself deciding not to tell them anything.

Occasionally you looked over in Dami’s direction, stealing glances of the girl. Sometimes you caught her staring at you, resulting in the two of you laughing at each other.

•

The award show had just ended and cameras stopped rolling. Jian had been taken home with the other minors, as it was well past their curfew. But judging by the text messages she sent you, she met Wonyoung and got her number as she’d hoped for.

Two of your members ran off to go meet Loona and (G)I-DLE. While the rest of your members, along with you, went to talk to Dreamcatcher.

Right as you were about to talk to Dami you felt someone grab your arm and pull you back. Giving the girl an apologetic look you turned around diverting yourself attention to someone else.

One of your members, Haeun, excitedly stood in front of you, “I just met Hyunjin! She was so nice Y/N! And I met Heejin and I got Chuu’s number, she wants to be friends with me. And Vivi...she’s so pretty like I knew she was pretty but in person Y/N you have to come see the-”

Haeun stopped rambling when she noticed Dami standing behind you. Her eyes widened as she asked “oh! I’m sorry....oouuu look at you! Okay bye.” She turned you back around and pushed you a little to hard, making you stumble into Dami’s arms for the second time tonight.

“You just keep falling for me huh?” She asked with a smirk.

Standing up you tried to hide your blush “yeah...sorry about that...”

Dami placed a hand on your arm, “its okay...i’ll catch you everytime.”

Covering your hands with your face you tried to hide the fact that her comment made you smile like an idiot. “Just remind me I owe you next time you see me, hmm?”

She responded “I know how you can repay me....”

Her hand dropped down so she was now holding yours, her thumb grazing the top of your knuckles.

A blush creeped onto your face as you raised an eyebrow in response.

“I want your number.” She stepped closer to you so only you could hear her next words, “and I want to take you out. Sound good?”

All you could do was nod before putting your contact into her phone. She glanced at the screen before laughing to herself at your contact Y/N 🎀✨

“Dami we have to go.” JiU called for her, waving for her to come over to the rest of her members.

She looked back at you and said with a smile “I’ll text you later, see you around cutie.”

The second she left, you slowly turned back to face your members who were all stunned. Haeun asked “how’d you even- you couldn’t even talk to her at the beginning of the night! How?!”

You smiled at the realization and said “I just kinda fell for her.”

#kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff #dreamcatcher dami #dreamcatcher scenarios #dreamcatcher imagines

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spaceysp · 3 years

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is bad good at pvp? im a new fan and i ran into ur blog, you seem to know a lot about badboyhalo

hashahah im sorry “you seem to know a lot about badboyhalo” made me laugh very hard thank you im flattered you think that /gen i hope everyone sees my blog and just thinks “wow they know a LOT about badboyhalo” (tbf id talk about skeppy more if there are more asks about him i love he too)

anyway, this is.. a tough question for me, im not gonna lie. inside me, there are two wolves, one that wants to laugh at bad for being terrible at video games, and one that is constantly simping for epic mlg badboyhalo gamer moments. both are almost completely skewed from the truth so imma try to be as unbiased and factual as i can.

okay, so, the places you can see bbh pvping is mainly in four groups, imo. his old videos at mcpvp, vids with skeppy (bedwars/skywars/bets or challenges), manhunt, and the dsmp. ill be talking about his performance in each of these and then maybe form a loose conclusion.

in my opinion, bad seemed to be really good at pvp in his old minecraft hunger game videos. it could be argued that he cut out games that he lost or didnt do very good in, and i have no way of proving or disproving that, but i think most of the fights we do see, he seems to be a really respectable player, and could win even 2 or 3v1s. in some banning hackers videos he’ll occasionally duel them, and could stand his ground in most cases. i think his pvp skill seems to shine most in these vids, hes really adapted to soup and 1.8 combat and it shows

however, most skeppy videos seem to be the exact opposite. skeppy can usually dominate him in skywars, bedwars, and most other ways they have 1v1d. bad still has the advantage in bow fights, but even those arent a 100% win ratio. (if he wants an assured win he goes with tic-tac-toe) most times bad manages to win against skeppy in bedwars is when hes given the opprotunity to grind enough, get the best gear then easily overpower skeppy, able to kill him over and over again, but hes famously weak against skeppys main strategy of rushing his bed because his defensive playstyle rarely works without proper materials. i think theres three reasons he seems to be worse at pvp in skeppy vids: 1. skeppy wins because its for his video so they throw 2. skeppys also really good 3. bads skill flies out the window around skeppy. honestly i think these all have an equal likelihood for being true so judge for yourself

as for manhunts, to be fair, i think anyone looks bad at pvp when compared to dream. bad is definitley more of the strategic leader then someone to stay on dreams tail to fight like sapnap is. however, especialy recently, bad seems to stay alive longer than he used to, also needing to get the hang of balancing defense and offense. i think manhunt best displays bads main strategy for pvp, he doesnt rely as much on skill as he does on catching his opponent off guard mentally. it can be called a dirty tactic, sure, but it works. as the one to come up with most traps, hiding in the end, and making dream think hes mining, he does a lot for the hunters. that other post explained it best, but i agree that he’s really good, incidentally though, direct pvp seems to be his weakness from my perspective

okay and finally, the dsmp. bad doesnt get into too many fights, but many have pointed out that he was able to hold his own in a fight against techno, and was about to kill tommy before dream came in to save him (idk what kind of gear tommy had in comparison to bad though) overall, i htink he benefits from his ability to grind and gain as many op items as possible, giving him the upper hand, almost like bedwars or manhunts, but in an entirely different context. he also can have his choice of weapon everytime, and is known to enchant his weapons to the brim

reading this back it kinda sounds like im dissing bads abilities, but in this conclusion i wanna say im not, this man got a combat disadvantage higher than dreams in a minecraft tournament, and overall i believe hes underestimated for sure. however, i also think he needs to use his environment to his advantage to be at his full potential. so yeah, take from this what you will, i still as i am writing this am at odds whether to say i think hes great or lacking, so i say form your own opinion and dont take my words at complete face value, im somehow biased in both directions

thank you for the ask, i really appreciate it!!! i hope i didnt just confuse you and this is still comprehensible!! <3<3<3

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just-zenitsu · 4 years

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oh that makes me curious... do you think zenitsu was thrown between orphanages and foster homes as a kid? or maybe he was in one until he ran away, either when he eloped or some time before and then lived on the street from then... or did he just live on the streets his whole childhood? ive been wondering this for days and its been on my mind for ages

*deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

first of all id like to say that i have like three fic ideas that explore his past (whether it focuses on how he grew up or not) BUT THANK U FOR INDULGING ME GUYS IM DEFINITELY RAMBLING ABT EACH OF THEM NOW… (this is a fucking monster tho. so its under read more)

* @anon THATS A WHOLE ASS MOOD TBH. i spend literal hours at night thinking abt whether he was in an orphanage or a street kid. ive wrote him living in the streets and getting sent to an orphanage when he was caught stealing. whereas i ALSO have mindless scribbled notes of modern au where his parents left him in an orphanage but bc of bad experiences (and thats putting it lightly) he gets sent to different homes A LOT and eventually gets kicked out at some point, ILL GET TO THAT LATER IN A BIT

* SINCE im trying to NOT write a fic here ill just list down headcanons and stuff bc YEET!!!! and for the sake of convenience lets just say he was both sent to an orphanage and lived as a street kid :”DD

* lets talk abt hcs ive seen first,, jpn fandom mostly all seem to hc him as a street kid who lived by working on odd jobs and the sort. ofc more often than not he just gets the bare amount for payment and the people he works for arent really nice :(( they never have the nicest words to say and sometimes they even hit him. zen sometimes endures it bc its not like he has much of a choice in the end. other times he runs away crying and scared.

* he also doesnt really have a permanent home so he wanders a lot carrying what little stuff he owns (probably a few clothes or a worn-out futon or something)

* he’s taken advantage of a lot,, whether it’d be people tricking him into doing some work saying ‘he’ll be given something good in return’ or something equally vague. he usually wonders why their words sound so kind in comparison to their heartbeats that sound… off,, its not until he’s older that he gets an answer to that question

* bc he cant be picky i like to think that its not that hard for him to sleep somewhere uncomfortable. he also curls up a lot into a ball when he sleeps. he likes being cooped up into small spaces, it makes him feel safe and that no one can get him.

* was initially very verbal about his hearing condition (something along the lines of saying ‘i heard you say that ____’ or ‘hey, do you hear that’ etc etc.) people think hes creepy and/or he’s lying most of the time. he eventually doesnt really wanna talk about it anymore once someone came this close to threatening to cut his ears off.

* i think we can say that zen lived in the city? its why he likes expensive things and the sort, and he has a lot of stock knowledge about how the city works and stuff like that, not to say that he’s ever really participated in it

* as a child (and even as he got older) zenitsu’s favorite season is spring, autumn being a close second. he likes spring bc the air is fresh and he can find flowers in the outskirts of the city, surviving despite growing in cracked concrete. he makes little flower crowns out of them!

* he likes autumn bc the way the leaves change is pretty! but its only second to spring bc the flowers usually wilt by then and he gets cold :(

* he doesnt like winter simply because it is VERY cold. he dislikes summer the most tho bc the sound of literal thousands of cicadas give him a lot of headaches aaa

* is very used to being hungry when he goes to sleep. he makes due with it as best as he can. one of his fondest memories is a frail old man who owns a sweet bun cart that gives him buns in exchange for a lower price than what he actually sells them for. on a day where he thinks the old man looks more tired and quiet than usual, zenitsu takes it upon himself to give him a flower crown.

* unfortunately he never is able to give it, bc the next day, or days after that, zenitsu never sees him again.

* he has experience bein a sneaky little thief! its the reason on why he can easily take sweets without permission at the butterfly estate in canon hehe

* but its this very same reason that he gets sent to an orphanage, he gets caught! and bc he is a Literal Child. they send him to foster care woohoo

* (GOD THIS IS GETTING SO LONG BUT PLS DEAL WITH MY RAMBLING….)

* i dont have a clear idea on how zenitsu couldve been treated in an orphanage. but all in all, he’s just very grateful to be given some kind of semblance of a home and food

* he learned how to speak (barely) when he lived in the streets, but they teach the basic minimum and suddenly he’s learning all these sorts of things

* the people who took care of them arent the most affectionate, neither are the kids he lives with. zenitsu’s crying is often really looked down upon, he tries to stop but he can’t really help it. he’s not really anyones favorite person here

* there’s a small somewhat neglected garden in the orphanage’s backyard. he spends his time here when everyones playing and no one wants to play with him

* every time someone comes to adopt a kid he cries and begs for them to adopt him whenever they show a spark of interest towards him. it goes as bad as u think it does, they dont like that type of kid, and as such they assume everyone else is like that and leaves w/o taking anyone. zenitsu isnt allowed to eat dinner in these nights ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

* bc of the latter reason, kids gang up and bully him a lot. zenitsu tries to go along w it bc its the ONLY time anyone ever pays attention to him, but at the end of the day the only thing he gets is scratches and bruises from being pushed around and lots of words that hurt his heart

* (WAHH. OPK OK IM SORRY IM SAD NOW AINNFJKKJFDFHKH..)

* people think he’s a nuisance more or less. and then he gets sent to varied foster homes again and again bc he’s ‘difficult to deal with’ and going back to the first bullet point, he gets kicked out again wAH. at this point he might have been 15 and its when he starts trying to date girls, despite hearing everyone’s sounds of deceit and lies time and time again, he still goes through with it. and the rest is canon,

OK. thats basically my brain vomit about zenitsu backstory. i am deceased and IM JUST PURELY FROTHING AT THE MOUTH EVERYTIME I THINK ABT HIM KDFKLGDFDGHF. thank u sm if u read this far, i appreciate it ;_______;

#ask #KHGJSKGKJGD THIS TOOK SO LONG HAHAHHAHAH #headcanons #.post #screaming but w feeling

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tangerinegod · 4 years

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Hello! I am sorry to bother you but I am a senior getting ready for college this year. I am in the US and I wanted to major in the same thing you did, do you have any possible tips for me? I still haven't even looked for colleges that would be best for animation majors so I figured if you were up to giving out any tips/saying any basic ideas if you wanted to/if you had the time to then maybe I'll have a better idea! I apologise for if I sound weird! I'm tried to word it correctly but I can't 😿

hi!! i’m totally down to share my experiences! someone else also had some questions so i’m going to put them all together in this post haha, hopefully this helps! it’ll get pretty long so apologies ahead of time but art school is a lot to think about so i wanna be as helpful as i can around it, its a lot of time and money. I’m gonna put it all under a read more cus it is really really long!

i wanna start off with the fact that I had the privilege of attending school in a financially stable environment, my parents were/are really supportive so w merit scholarship i only came out with around 20-30k in debt and i also had housing support my entire time in school. they were ok with me focusing on academics so i didn’t hold a retail job unless i was out of school like summer/winter break. Ofc though i regularly take commissions/do merch/cons to try and pay for all bills that arent rent cus i did want to be financially independent where it was possible. I also did try and work during the semester but everytime i did my body would deff start to breakdown from the fact that i didnt wanna compromise schoolwork with jobs.. so just read ahead know this experience is from a student who was able to attend focusing only on school work for most of the time!

the biggest thing is knowing art school is not required to become a professional in either freelancing or industry! there are a huuuge amount of online tools and classes these days that provide the exact same education and for cheaper too. i think it depends on what experience you prefer/can handle/want but it’s definitely possible to make art/animation art your living without higher education. the thing that college will for sure give you though is the ability to meet deadlines, work even when you dont want to, and connections with peers+teachers. i think the connections part is invaluable because you’re basically coming out with a network of people you already know and who know you!

also its good to know if you want to attend/can handle art school! it’s a lot of time and energy and students get burned out really fast. the best piece of advice i got before going was ‘if you draw every single day, even if its for only like 5-10 minutes or a doodle for a whole year you should be fine’ consistency is super key because you’re attending school to draw, and you’ll have to create work for stuff you aren’t excited for at some point or another. burnout is extremely real and the only reason i didn’t experience it was probably because i got super into drawing naruto fanart again inbetween sophomore and junior year! it helped give me something to draw seperated from school which is the only thing i was drawing for since i had entered rip. a heads up id also consider myself a workaholic so i fit in ok with the ‘art school’ environment but it is suuper unhealthy. if you are fantastic at managing your schedule then it’s definitely possible to take care of yourself! freshman year i got 8 hours a sleep a night and only pulled all nighters for some second semester finals at the end. sophomore year + up though i ended up prioritizing hw over sleep and like for sure, definitely shortened my life span. there’s another q down below where i’ll go more into detail but ya, be careful w ur work balance!

another tip especially for animation is knowing for a fact what type of animation you’re looking to go into, and what the school is offering. I didn’t think i’d get into art school at the time so i only applied to two places + decided if i didnt get into either id attend community to get credits out of the way while building portfolio. honestly? i did not do a lot of research LOL but like i did end up having the chance to tour and stuff! just know that each school will have a very different curriculum. The main differences are schools that prioritize 3D (cg animation, cg modeling, ect) and 2D/traditional (hand drawn, ‘oldschool’, digital or traditional based) this is a huge difference so make sure you do research for it! in most cases a 2D/traditional program will also offer 3D since it’s at the forefront of the industry animation wise rn. My school taught 2D but like hand drawn on physical paper 2D, frame by frame. while it was a good experience it’s super outdated because digital tools make it way faster + easier! i’d recommend looking for a program that is digital 2D over traditional 2D.

if after your senior year covid is still affecting campuses in the US to keep them shut down i’d recommend attending a community college to get credits and then transferring into school. one of the negatives is paying money for gened classes when ur not there for them; if you can get them out of the way sooner and cheaper there is absolutely no negative + you could graduate earlier or use the extra time for better work or to work a job!

these are all the general tips i think i’d give on like a broad basis of attending or not to think about? let me know if u have more q’s! someone asked q’s im answering below that go more into personal experiences + work culture so heres those:

- how many hours a week do u spend studying, in class, otherwise making art? like how much of ur life does it consume?

I was basically working on art.... 24/7! since i wasnt working a job at the same time i crammed as many credits as possible into my schedule so on avg i did 18 credit semesters (around 6 classes) art classes go for 6 hours and non art go for 3, so i’d spent around 30-35 hours in class a week! hw wise it varied on the class but combined it would be around 35-50 hours a week... im guessing? on average studio classes would have 8-10 hours of hw, maybe 5 for a light week, and gened classes 5 hours w them all combined. or this was probably how things were before junior year? junior+senior year i had thesis + everything else ontop.. i’d spend around 30-40 hours on thesis a week with other classes ontop of that bc my film was super long cus im a dummy!

- is it hard going to art school n realising that altho u were probably quite talented… so is everyone else? Like. all of a sudden. ur not special and everyone seems as good as u, you know? More generally, how do u deal with comparison?

kinda?? i think instead of the idea of like you vs others it feels more of like a competition at first to be the best. this varies hugely on school culture though; my animation year was really friendly with each other and get along extremely well, so my answer to this is v different than some others who attended different schools. i think that the idea of ‘comparison’ only lasts a portion of the first year because at some point you realize that it’s not a who’s better as much as its a ‘these are my coworkers’ type thing? like healthy competition 100% because we’re all working to improve but i think most of us learned pretty early on that viewing each other as peers going into the same workforce helped a lot. also at some point everyone develops their own style/starts to develop their artistic preferences so there isn’t a way to compare whos 'better’ anymore? i dont think there ever is tbh because style is appealing based off of an individuals preferences. If anything realizing everyone else is also amazing makes you wanna work harder ig? or thats how i felt! it’s inspiring to be surrounded by so many people who create such amazing work.

- is there a lot of workaholic culture? all nighter culture?

100000% there can be a workaholic and all nighter culture. i know people who avoided it and thats honestly fantastic because i fall super easily into that pit. sometimes i’ll pull all nighters on a personal project just because i really want to finish it... i am definitely considered a workaholic all the way through and its not healthy rip... i’d estimate at the worst i was pulling 2-3 all nighters a week and only 4-5 hours of sleep on the nights i didn’t? that was only for one year tho, after that i was like yeah ok this is really bad for my health in the long run LOL so i tried to cut it down to one all nighter a week and around 5-6 hours of sleep the rest of the week! by senior year my decision to cram in full semesters paid off and i was able to consistently get around 7 hours of sleep a night + no all nighters minus finals since my schedule was lighter despite thesis 😭 while there is that culture i don’t think people view it as like a badge of honor or something to be proud of anymore which is good, we mostly view it as a flaw of the art school system and something that needs to be fixed!!

- are you glad u did it? how did u know it was what u wanted?

i am glad i did it! i’m definitely in a limbo right now of if it was worth both my time, money, and my parents money rip but i think with what i got out of it i definitely wouldn’t be as far skill wise or knowledge wise when it comes to the art industry. i would say it was only worth it for be because i had so much support going in though so i was able to focus so much on improving. if i had only been able to put in part of the effort and not make full use of the resources provided i would honestly have a different answer..

i knew it was what i wanted when i realized i really couldn’t see myself pursuing a different profession happily! despite all the bumps and stuff im fully in love with drawing still and feel honored that it’s a field that can provide a living. my second profession choice was to go into culinary school? and third option i think going was into music cus i was also a band kid hehe.

- how do u cope with ur hobby becoming ur job? how do u deal with art going from something u do for fun to something u do on command constantly?

i think seperating work art from personal art is important! in my case im doubling naruto into being personal work so i have something to fall back onto that isn’t work related. its been a hyperfixation for 12+ years? so drawing it at this point is just like personal art imo. some people have hobbies outside of art and only draw for their job! i think after attending classes for so long the idea of hobby turning into job feels extremely natural? also i enjoy doing it so thats a huge plus!

sorry this is SO long but i hope i answered your guys’ questions! if you have more just lmk!

#anon #ask #long post #im so so sorry this is like long as shit #ill literally tell you guys everything though art school should not feel like a mystery esp if ur planning to go into it!#Anonymous

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stingroy · 4 years

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Who do you think was the mist immoral character of Moral Orel Clay or Censordoll? Do you think there were evil characters in the show or were they just flawed people trying to do what they perceived as the right thing?

THIS POST IS LONG BEWARE

im bias but clay all the way

if ms censordoll was a real person i would despise her, but in the show shes really fun and interesting to watch imo! of course i dont condone book burning and censorship i just think shes a good character to critique and make fun censorship with, plus i love her voice whoever her voice actor is did a great job. to be honest i havent rewatched the episodes where shes a main focal point in a long while so i need to refresh my memory before id be able to really form a strong opinion on her that i would stand by firmly

clay is an abusive addict with no interest in anyone else but himself, he has no agenda other than to get drunk and be miserable. i mean maybe he’s “invested” in teaching orel because he’s his only (legitamate) son but then... nature still happened. clay often talks about how hes distant from his family on purpose and doesnt care about them so i dont think he really gives that much of a shit all in all. i know he had a difficult childhood (yet another episode i need to rewatch (its been years), im on s2e3 so i still have a ways) but it doesnt justify like anything he does. cool motive still murder yknow? clay reminds me a lot of my religious alcoholic estranged father so i DEFINITELY have a personal bone to pick with clay cuz ive been there.

when it comes to whether the townspeople are evil, i feel like that question really lies at the heart of the show, not just for clay and censordoll but almost everyone in moralton (cept for orel of course). i could go into that concept for the next seventeen years so i wont right now but i think between the both of them at least censordoll probably thought she was doing the right thing for the people in her town. not that anything she did was actually right, but organizing all those daily pickets and book burnings must take some effort, right? someone who didnt care at all wouldnt go through the trouble. she seems to like genuinely care about moralton being righteous, even if her idea of righteous media is completely skewed and wrong. i wouldnt call that evil, horribly misguided and incorrect definitely but evil? im not really sure.

again tho its been a while so my opinion might change as i run thru s2 and 3 again, and im really starting to consider that if censordoll was a real person i probably would consider her to be evil but that might be more of a comment on my thought processes and perception of people than censordoll herself... lol

i dont know if clay even thinks he’s doing the right thing by orel truly. i think somewhere deep inside past his addiction there is someone in there trying to do something for orel, trying to keep him on the right path in a weird and terribly unfortunate way. clay has made it clear through his actions that he will not engage with parts of his family that he doesnt care about (cough bloberta and shapey cough), and he seems to always make time for orel. whenever orel needs to talk to him, clay is around to give his lessons and “guidance”. maybe thats just because his lessons are a crucial part of the show, but i think that shows. some effort? some acknowledgement? that he doesnt show to anything else other than drinking.

unfortunately clay is a sick motherfucker. he’s so rooted in his own trauma and addiction that he cant see anything other than his own pain. and i do absolutely sympathize with that, ive dealt with my own traumas and addictions and you lose sight of who you are and what you value. sometimes people can get to the point where they lose everything they love other than the bottle, and then they die and lose that too. its a disease, and its absolutely not someones fault that they have an alcohol problem.

but clay gives into himself. he makes no effort to change his situation, bloberta even brings this up in s1ep10 when theyre arguing about shapey’s breastfeeding. she tells him to quit his stinkin dead end job and stop being such a crybaby and you know what shes mean af but shes right! all clay does is wallow around and drink because hes miserable and stays miserable because he drinks. he numbs everything out instead of changing his life for... convenience? image? fear? probably a combo

my real problem with clay is that he hurts people because he is hurt. thats where my sympathy dies and i no longer really care about his motivations and trauma. i think nature is the clearest example of that, but clay hurts orel throughout the show. like damn he literally beats the kid with a belt in 90% of the episodes. its just not justifiable to me at all.

i will say one more thing that clay does that i think really says something about him. everytime orel does something wrong, clay takes him to his study, beats/spanks him with the belt (we never see it so who knows how severe it is), and then talks to orel. and orel LISTENS. ALWAYS. clay doesnt have to beat orel to punish him, orel has such a strong sense of loyalty and obiedience that his true punishment is his fathers disappointment. orel always listens to what clay says without question, and clay still finds it nessecary to beat him. it makes me think that clay gets something else out of that interaction like vindication, stress relief, or something of that nature. its cruel, and its selfish. its like beating a dog. you dont have to do it to make him listen to you, so why do it? probably for a reason other than discipline.

clay and censordoll are obvs the two people we’re talking about but a lot of people in moralton do bad things for the sake of righteousness and goodness. like i said a bit earlier i really do think that question is The Big Question of the show, and i feel like many people will have varying opinions based on their own morals and life experiences. the intricate motivations and values of each of the characters in moral orel is one of the things that makes the show so great and so interesting that here i am writing a long winded “analysis” on it on tumblr a decade after it was released.

WOW i completely derailed myself and started rambling for seven hours but!!!

tl;dr clay is a bitch and the people of moralton arent inherently evil monsters but i sure do have my problems with them

#THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS QUESTION #i think i really needed to Talk. About Clay.#I Could Go On. about almost every character in that show but obvs wont atm because this is already les miserables level of length #but im sure ill get there eventually if my diatribes arent too annoying to yall #moral orel #anon #abuse #alcoholism #long post

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hyunjinssmile · 5 years

Text

“Lyrics For You”; Han Jisung

Disclaimers:

Descriptions of sex, dirty talk, angst, fluff, swearing, friends with benefits -> lovers,

Also, excuse my handwriting in this, as well as the lyrics (theyre mine and already in a released song, (aside from the my head hurts; thats for plot)

It was the usual, by now.

He would come home from practice, or hanging out with the boys, and then have you waiting for him, ready for him, to take care of him. It only really took one call; a message even, and you were both there for eachother, but dont get ahead of yourself y/n, you arent in a relationship.

Since highschool, you were both close, really close, but not in a relationship sense. Both of you produced music together and danced together, and even now after he has debuted, it just easier for him to have you; no strings attached, plus the world already knew you as 3rachas friend; a producer that made sure they would eat and rest, stays around the world thanked you for that the most.

Basically, somewhere along the line, Jisung and yourself became more than friends. You became friends with benefits, and unfortunately for you; like the plot of the 2013 Smuts on wattpad, you had fallen for him.

You had fallen for Han Jisung.

Would you ever tell him? Definitely not. Especially since after everytime you both hang out alone, he always thanks you so much for being his friend and understanding his situation, saying he loves how things always are.

“Y-yeah! Its fine” you smile at him as he puts on his clothes, after getting a call from JYP to come to practice earlier than he expected, to which he jumped up and got into the shower.

To be quite honest, the sex was distant. It was passionate, but quite clearly he was distancing himself from being intimate, he would never call you by anything other than your name, no pet names, and hed always take you from behind, never looking into your eyes. It was rushed, and rough, and although you found it incredibly hot and arousing, the emotions, rather the lack thereof, made you sad. It stopped you from enjoying it as much, you loved being close to him, and since he obviously didnt like you like you liked him, this was the closest youd get to it, to him.

It wasnt fine, as he shut the door, mumbling a goodbye and a promise to call you later, your hips hurt, you couldnt walk properly, and your heart ached. It ached for him, because of him.

You reached for your laptop beside you, wincing at the shocks of pain in your hips, before starting to make something, you needed to get your emotions out.

You work on a beat, the notes holding a sad feeling in your gut as you manage to get up from the bed, chucking on one of jisungs shirts that he had left from countless sleepovers, because even now, with the benefits part, he was still your best friend. You waddled your way to your studio, one that was often used by chris and changbin, as well as jisung, as when one of your songs you produced blew up; you could afford an apartment with a personal studio.

You sat down in your chair, cursing at the way you relaxed at the smell of jisungs shirt, before letting the beat play around you, adding in some tonal melodies ontop, before scribbling down some lyrics.

Time had flown by, and you got caught up in the process, the melodies and lyrics meaning so much to you, that tears ran down your face, your heart hurt, and this was how you were going to let it out.

Your phone had been going off in your room for ages, too caught up, you failed to recieve the messages from jisung, and in a panic, he travelled to your place.

Apon entering your apartment, he was met with a heavy bassline, but a slow, almost sad melody- contrast to your usual upbeat songs.

Jisung had liked you since he met you, but when he decided he wanted to persue being an idol, a producer, he knew he could never date- at least not in the public eye. You were his best friend, and after one night when you got closer, you both never looked back, friends with benefits was something that suited you both; well, judging by how quick you were to agree on the title; it suited you at least.

He wanted you to himself, he could only think of having you always in his arms, calling you his own, rather than the plaguing thoughts of you in a bed of someone else, but who was he to tell you not to? You werent exclusive, he made that clear. He groans at his stupidity, before walking to your studio, the lights were off as always, but he saw you hunched over your desk, the music blaring through the speakers next to you.

“Y/n?” He called out, before turning the music down, being left with your broken sobs as his eyes widened. You looked up in surprise, to find him standing there, wiping your eyes and attemtping to smile.

“Hey- jisung!” You said trying to be happy, which only made him more concerned.

“Whats wrong?” He said immediately,

“N-nothing, just writing something.” You tried to convice yourself you were fine for a moment, hiding the lyrics under your arms.

“Youre crying?” He moved closer to you, “and this is a sad song, y/n, you dont write sad songs, whats up?” He pauses, playing the devils advocate “boy troubles?”

You could only dryly laugh, “yes, actually”

Jisung felt his heart drop, before moving closer to you, trying to peer at the lyrics, watching you hide them. “Can i read?” He asked softly.

“No.” You said without looking at him, making him more confused. He tried to grab them, moving around, but each time you covered it, until he grabbed it from you.

“Jisung- just give it back-“

He held the page in his hands as he read it,

“Who is it?” He said softly, genuine care in his voice.

“Just give it back!” You stood up, making his eyes fall to your smaller figure, the shirt immediately recognised as his own.

He couldnt help but smile at the way you jumped to try and get it back from him, your cheeks pink, tears in the corner of your eyes.

“So you like someone? Maybe we should stop this” he gestured at the both of you, trying to conceal his hurt.

“What?” You said softly, your eyes widened.

“We should call this quits, us, ill find someone else” he was being casual, he knew it would hurt you, but it hurt him that you liked someone else, while he fucked you into the mattress every other night.

“Jisu-“

“You know, i thought i liked you, for a little while. I wont hide it. But, id hate to be the guy you liked if you fucked someone else while writing sappy song lyrics about them.”

He was being mean, really mean.

“I dont like you anymore, and were done.” His voice was cold, and the tears kept falling from your eyes, wide open with shock.

“You- I- the lyrics-“ you tried to speak softly, but he was mad. “Am i not good enough for you? Hm? Do i mean nothing?” He kept going.

“Get out” you whispered, eyes full with tears.

“What?” He was taken aback, you had never told him to leave, even during arguments.

“I SAID GET OUT”

And he was gone,

He took the paper with him, reading it in pain and ager the whole way back to the dorm, slamming the door behind him as he entered.

Chris was the first to talk to him, asking what was wrong. The boy crumbled in his arms, explaining everything, even mentioning how you two were friends with benefits, making chris surprised yet it suddenly all clicked.

“Let me see the lyrics”

As chris held the lyrics up infront of him, jisungs eyes widened as he saw a name scribbled on the back, immense guilt filling his entire being as he lost all air from his lungs.

“H-hyung move- move your hand for a second-“

Dread filled him, as he immediately got up, running as fast as his legs took him down the hall, out the door and out onto the street, running to your house, with tears in his eyes.

“You fucking idiot” he whined to himself as tears fell down his face, the colder air from winter bit at the skin on his face, but he kept running, until he was at your door, walking in, and running straight to your studio, finding you lying on the ground, crying your heart out and from experience, having a panic attack.

He immediately ran to you, picking you up and taking you to your room, placing you on the bed, looking at the way your eyes widened at his presence.

“W-why-“ you tried to speak, but he just held you tighter, pulling your body against his in a tigh hold, arms around you, squeezing you against his chest, your face pressed into his shoulder, as he cried into your own.

It would always calm you down, his hugs. Whenever you had panic attacs when you were younger, jisung was there, there to squeeze you and make you realise youre not alone.

“Im here- im here baby- shh-“

Endless petnames flew from his mouth as he helped you calm down, his nimble fingers wiping your tears away gently, his eyes reflecting your own.

“Im an idiot-“ he started slowly,

“Yes you are” you said softly, voice broken.

“I deserve it if you hate me, y/n. Im so sorry, even all this time id been using you because i thought you didnt like me enough to go out with me- and because of my job , i thought this was the closest id get to having you-“

“You have me” you whispered softly, making his eyes widen. “I felt the exact same way, you dumbass “ you said, looking up at him.

“So i could have been making you mine this whole time, taking you out, but all ive done is fucked you roughly, never said anything and had no emotion, all the times you said you were fine-“ his eyes widened again at the realisation of how it must have hurt you, confused you.

“Baby i am so, so fucking sorry.”

You held him closer to you, tightening your own grip as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, his breath fanning warm heat onto the surface.

“Ive never kissed you?” He suddenly said, breaking the silence, moving from his place on your chest , gour hands slipping from his soft locks of hair. You had talked for a while, sorting out how you felt and what you wanted, and then lay in silence, in eachothers arms for a few hours.

“No, you haven-“

He cut you off, pressing his soft lips against your own, his right hand cupping your jaw as he let himself wiggle between your legs, laying ontop of you and covering your body with his own, the feeling of him finally pouring all his love for you out, yourself doing the same, sent you both into an overflow of emotion, he pulled back, observing the way your cheeks tinged pink, his eyes locking with yours as he admired them, the view of you pinned beneath him, hair flowing our around you, made his heart skip a beat, his eyes landing on your now swollen lips from the kiss, warmth filling his being as he admired your beauty.

“Youre so beautiful, y/n, your eyes, your lips, your hair, your smile, your laugh, your jokes, your little pout, the way you stumble sometimes when you walk-“ he was blabbering, he knew it, but your heart filled with so much happiness, “i notice it all, i really do love you y/n. Be mine?”

“Im yours” you said softly, making him smile.

“Now to do this properly..” his hands dragged your underwear down your legs, removing his shirt from your frame as he undressed himself.

You immediately got onto your hands and knees, making him chuckle, immediately grabing your hips and pushing you back onto the bed, your back against the sheets as you gasped in surprise at his show of strength.

“I want to watch you as i make love to you, i want to watch your expression as i fuck this tight pussy, make it mine, youre mine, right?”

You nodded, making him smile down at you lovingly, pressing his lips to yours as he kissed you passionately, his fingers trailing down to your heat as he felt your wetness, his eyes widening is surprise “youre so fucking wet, you needed this huh? Making love is much better, i agree, im harder than ive ever been right now baby” he groaned, before letting one of his fingers enter you, slipping inside before moving so his hips are inline with your own, kissing up your neck to your lips before pushing himself inside of you, his hands holding your hips down against the mattress as he bottomed out, a whine falling from his lips as you whimpered into his ear, his brows furrowed as his lips found yours again, smiling against them as you did the same. “Feels so much fucking better, knowing that youre mine, baby.”

Bonus, 2 months later:

“This is such a good song, Chris, whats the chorus?” Your voice was happy as jisung held you close to him, his arms around your waist as you both sat on the couch in your studio, cuddling into eachother.

“I got inspiration from you two drama queens really. “

“Really?” You both turned to eachother, looking in eachothers eyes, finding nothing but happiness in eachother.

“Yeah, I used some of yours actually y/n.”

“Thats fine, you gave me some last season.” You reassured, smiling.

Chan smiled and pressed play on the chorus of the song, the lead up including a muffled audio scream, before you heard it;

“My head hurts”

Side note:

I actually write, make and produce some music too, so i felt quite close to this story. The emotions running wild whilst writing can really get heavy, and i actually do find myself crying whilst recording a demo, or writing the score, its the same with writing a fic, dont worry if its angst im crying along with ya, its just passion and heartache mixed together in a cocktail of emotions.

Lmao thats another one of my lyrics, ok ill stop thankyou for reading

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marcellaisnotme · 4 years

Text

to everyone.

to all the amazing people that light up my 2019, let's continue our journey to 2020. 2019 has been pretty amazing to me than last year and i'm rather excited for what's going to come on 2020. its a bit frightening but at the same time i'm ready to face it.

i'm dedicating each of you who got this page a personal message <3

let me start it with my loving Ren ♡ we met not that long ago but long enough for me to call you a special friend. i love hanging out with you, i love ranting everything to you cause you're a really good listener, advisor and most importantly a really great sidekick. okno. you know what to say to make me feel better and i admire that you can think of so much in a short amount of time. the way you handle everything is very responsible and careful, i look up to you alot. let's be more closer and share more stupid shitposts (RED VELVET PLSSS). i love you!!

Jason ♡ we known each other for a very long time but we always been pretty close to each other, but sometimes we don't talk and we argue that one time. and you went missing too but when you came back i was really excited. you were really funny and entertaining. just what i need, just what i wanted. we have a love hate relationship and we never get tired of each other and buuuu-ing each other everytime. okno. you are special to me and i cant find another jason to replace. thanks for being such a great friend. i love you!!

Juan ♡ my favorite movie partner and cuddle buddy <3 the one that would always tell stupid jokes which myself find it really funny even when it's pretty dumb. the one who never get tired of me punching you in the arm. okno. i wanna spend more time watching movies with you cause i personally hate watching movies cause i'm a book person. but when i watch it with you and hear you explaining to me everything made me love movies. pstt. only when i watch it with you <3 HAHAHA let's do more movie dates next time juan, because movies are not watch worthy without you. okno. i love you!!!

bwi ♡ as much as i find you pretty annoying and such a coward but i really know how it takes courage to do something. i know how does it feel when you feel like doing something. but it's find. i dont judge you for it ok? i was just messing around with you cause your reaction is always funny i dont wanna miss it. OKNO. if you havent moved on completely, it's fine. it takes time to heal and takes time to grow. i hope you have a better life and be happy in 2020. i love you!!

Belle ♡ SINCE YOU'RE A GIRL NOW IMMA CALL YOU BELLE. okno you were a guy when we first met and first dated. okno. i can't believe we made it till today even when we dont talk that much these days. i just want you to know even when i'm very very very annoying and stoopid but i am really thankful that you were always there listening to my probs and teas :(( i'm so dramatic. wipes non existent tears. okno. be less busy so that i can kacau you more :(( i love you!!

Kitty Kou ♡ my wife :(( my husband soulmate boyfriend girlfriend my everything :(( screams i miss you so much we're not talking much this days are you THAT busy gimme attention bich :(( okno. i'm glad that you are fine now (i can see and feel it) also i dont want you to be sad no more cause you dont deserve to be :(( i'll karate anyone that tries to mess with you i swear >:( i love you soooo much you're my fav bestie ever you listen to me and play along with me cause thats what soulmates do :(( dont ever leave my side or i'm gonna tie u to me so that you wont escape HAH take that :(( i love you bb♡

Qhal ♡ you stick up to me since day-1 and thats what i love about you. you grew into a better person, you were so much braver and bolder plus happier these days and i've never been so proud of you. i hope your happiness last till next year and the following and forever. every day is a new day. you dont have to close old books and open new ones. you dont have to be someone you're not and importantly, you dont have to do things for anyone else. yourself is your top priority and always remember that you're just as important. seeing you happy makes me happy. we've been friends for god knows how long and you never left my side, ever. you're always a special friend to me. you're always in my heart. i love you!!

Irwin ♡ not gonna deny you're always there for me when i'm in an existential crisis. okno. you're such a fun and funny person to talk with. i always enjoyed talking to you because you could make and awkward situation lively with your randomness. you radiate great and positive energy that anyone around you feel better. you make me feel better when i'm sad. i hope you and jade last looooooooooong enough just like how long we've known each other. i love you!!

Tian ♡ i love talking to you and randomly being stupid with you and jason. i love how we click with each other that much it's like we're siblings. rough things happened but let's all forget about it. i hope for you happiness as you were always sad about a certain someone. it's fine to think about it. it's fine to hold onto it. cause the longer you hold on, the easier it will go away when it gets old. you should really reveal your cute daughter to everyone. cause i miss her and everyone needs to see her <3 she's amazing just like you. i love you!!

Cosmo ♡ as long as we known each other, you were the brightest person and the easiest to get along with. you always know what to do and put your heart in everything you do. i dont like seeing you being sad or depressed anymore because you weren't like that when we first met. always surround yourself with happy stuff >> me. and do things you wanna do that makes you happy. you will always be my cosmo, and i'll always be your wanda♡. i love you!!

Junguan ♡ hi bestie how u doin. okno. i am glad that you're always happy, always problem free. thanks for listening to my problems, thanks for being a great friend. i have a great laugh and a great time with you always. your reaction to my stupidness and sarcasm was always funny i'm not gonna lie. you're always the one that i believe would keep everything i tell you a secret. you're such an awesome person and a great friend. i love you !!

Xie/ Axel ♡ you're a really interesting person to talk to. aside from our past relationship. you're a really strong and a great person. you're someone that doesn't give up on anything you do and i really adore you for that. you make everything seem so funny to me idk why oKNO. but except for our snapstreak, we dont really talk mUCH. did you moveD or are you just busY cause u krik krik im thinking twice about softblocking you. okno. talk to me bitch. i love you!!

marcell/shaq ♡ you change your name to match mine cause you like me eh?? buuu. okno. you were always someone i trusted because you're responsible of doing your job and you're someone nice to talk to i mean not nice nice because you're mean but nice by i can have a conversation with you and talk about random stuff without letting it die because i'm funny and you're lame okno. let other judge your outer and let yourself know your inner. jangan jadi noob for 2020. okno. i love you!!

Eric ♡ my stupid bun. my ride or die. ew. these two years 18/19 has been pretty rough for the both of us and i think it's just a step and a lesson to grow into a better person. you helped me alot through this year and i'm never less thankful for that. the loving things you do for me, the things you would let it slide when it comes to me. your soft spot for me never goes away huh HAH and i'm taking advantage of that. okno i'm kidding. you are a big help for me and for what i went through. you never said no. you always agree on everything and i really appreciate it. when we broke up last year, you still insisted to talk to me. which i find out really annoying. just kidding. i'll let everything slide since you do that to me too. you're a really great person, amazing let me tell you. thanks for being a great friend to me. thanks for helping me out with almost everything. i owe you big time. i love you!!

harry ♡ first of all, thank you for being a great bestie, we would always talk to each other everyday but you got busy these days :(( but yey, its almost a decade since ive known you, kyak. we met when we were in kbb. you were d__, kyak, smpipol 💕 i feel so giddy giddy all of a sudden lololol. and then we started exchanging contacts, you were first harry, on fl. and then we had this, nOOt squad gTG. im nunmul-ing. why is this suddenly a throwback session. and and and then theres trisha gosh i love trisha and you too. i adore you for being such an honest person, when it comes to telling your problems to us, which is something i cant really do. if you have problems, dont hesitate to tell us, though i dont really help much eheh. but sometimes there are things that arent meant to be said. its okay, theres nothing wrong feeling sad, feeling all those negative feelings. we are human too, we have feelings. it is okay to sometimes not be okay, it is okay. but other than that, be happy with those you are surrounded with. youre someone that worth a big hug. i hope you spent your day with those you love 💕 i hope youre having a good day. youre an amazingly talented person. i hope youd achieve your dream soon, i pray for your health, and for you to surrounded by lovely people. you're such a talented person and gosh, your drawings for the fashion week, cries. chef kisses momma!!! you should update me on your life more because i wanna know what you do and support you on everything you do. don't forget me anyways :(( because you're the only realest annoying brutally honest bitch i love :(( i love you!!

thanks for an amazing 2019, lets get closer in 2020. i love you guys. ♡

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wings-of-indigo · 5 years

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A Note on Relationships (that shouldn't be controversial but probably will be)

At work the other day, I got asked by one of my coworkers if I was single. On this particular occasion, that coworker was male. However, before everyone thinks this is another post about misogyny and the assumptions men make about women's availability in the workplace, let me note that I have been asked this question before by several female coworkers of various ages, but all near or over thirty.

And Everytime, when I reply that I am currently single and generally happy to be so(and go on to explain my reasons for this rare state of single happiness) I've gotten a combination of Looks.

There's the 'ooookaaaay' Look, the 'you're weird' Look, the 'You're wasting your youth' Look, and the 'You'll regret that later' Look. (Just to name a few). I've gotten used to it.

In the interests of full and unbragging disclosure, I know that I can be considered 'attractive' for a female (And wow that was hard to say outside my head. But the difficulties female assertiveness about appearance will be saved for another date). Dancing all the time keeps my relatively skinny by non dance world standards (I'm 5'3.5", usually within 5lbs of 130 lbs and I generally wear an upscale size 4), and while I'm definitely not the archetypal model thin ballerina, the fact that I fit a small size 4 (occasionally cursing and swearing) states my point quite neatly. I fit into conventional standards of female beauty.

Here's the thing though, about those Looks I mentioned earlier. I didn't date in high school, and I generally don't date now. Sure, if I get lonely or drunk enough I'll window shop OkCupid at one in the morning, but rarely do I have the inclination to follow through once recovered. And for a lot of people my age, that seems to be weird. In our society Single people arent supposed to be happy about it. Especially women.

And that's just stupid.

Most people agree that a single-by-choice man, even a confirmed I-dont-ever-want-romance man, batts no eyes in any context. A woman of the same, however, is immediately assumed to have something wrong with her. Either she is traumatized from some past experience, or she is simply defective and frigid. Even a woman who has previously proved her 'correctness' with marriage, even children, is not immune. If that woman does not want to enter another romantic relationship (and I'm including the full spectrum of queer identities as possible partners whenever I say marriage, partner, or romantic) after a time, then she is Wrong and Broken. Even if she has been abused by her partner and doesn't feel comfortable or capable of exposing herself like that again. Even if she has lost her long term 'soul mate' and does not want anything or anyone else after their loss. One of our media's favorite romantic tropes is The Woman who Learns to Overcome her Tragic Past and find Happiness in the (99% male) Protagonist's Romantic and Sexual Intrest. Little girls are brought up to dream and plan their future wedding from the time they know what a wedding IS (which, spoiler alert: is pretty damn young. I first remember playing 'wedding' when I was about five and got a box of dress up costumes for Christmas).

So, it makes sense that a woman or girl, especially young not engaging or desiring to engage in Romantic Ventures hits some socially ingrained trigger points. It's still stupid.

Here's some reasons why (for me, y'all night have your own valid reasons). While not at intensive like I am now, I am holding down a full time job while doing anywhere from 15-20 hours of dance classes in studio, not counting any supplemental physical training and gym time I put in outside of class, while finishing an unrelated Bachelors Degree online, trying to shop for and cook dance supporting meals on a strict budget, do laundry, get a healthy amount of sleep, go to acting and singing coaching, and find funding for an upcoming dance program should pass auditions. I really, really don't have the time or emotional availability for a relationship.

And that is key here. People seem to underestimate the importance of emotional labor on both sides in a healthy relationship- you can't just show up to date night or activities together and make small talk. There's a reason people talk about 'emotional avaliabilty', and in most traditional 1950s style relationships it's the woman's job to avaliable for whichever man she's involved with. Unfortunately, the vast majority of men still seem to carry an unconscious bias towards this kind of relationship.

And, I'm sorry (not), but Im really not interested in That. I'm reminded of a tumblr post about cat ladies, and why men seem to think that's an insult to woman rather than themselves- that they're so unappealing they can't get a man. Leaving aside the sexist assumption a womans ambition ahould be to 'get a man'- Dude, if I wanted a man, I could get one. Any girl off the street could get one easier than ordering takeout when she's too tired to cook.

The problem lies not in the getting, but with the shopping. While I identify as bisexual and happily enjoy fun times of the erotic bent, one of my personal quirks is that I Can't Do One Nights. This is not misplaced slut shaming- I am fully aware and bear no disapproval towards pursuing casual sexual attraction. Your body, your choice. I just know myself, and that any sexual interaction with a stranger would be exceedingly unpleasant for me in an emotional sense.

I tend to be extroverted, and I love people. But I also grew up in an alcoholic household with a very dysfunctional and fraught marriage. My mother never beat us, but she's still controlling and can still make me feel like shit, and my dad still tends to be an emotional leech with terrifyingly destructive rages. (Yes, those are mental health issues, and I still love them-distantly- but it's not my job as their child to fix them or get them help.)

As a result, It takes me a while to trust someone, especially emotionally. And, as a female, sex is a huge act of trust and emotional investment.

I would love to create the loving marriages and relationships I see my friends having. It's one of my future fantasies- creating a home with a life partner, sharing dinner and cuddles and movies and giving each other good sex.

But here's the thing. I can give myself satisfying sex. And I, quite frankly, have other dreams too, ones that are going to demand a superhuman level of work. Getting back to the 'shopping' anology- the sad fact is that it is going to be very difficult to find a man who doesn't expect his partner to place him and his dreams above her own, and just as difficult to train one out of that mindset. (And girlfriends for girls are about as common as rainbow unicorns).

Having grown up as I did, I might have ridiculously high standards for romance. But I made a vow to never be my parents, and frankly I see no point in taking time away from what I want more than anything in order to appease an archaic societal preference.

Love does not mean the surrendering of self, and I am not going to devote myself anything less than something extraordinary.

So that's why I'm single, and I'm fine with that. Suck it.

#why we need feminism #feninism #relationship #dreams #romantic relationships #misogony #misogny #societal norms #societal standards

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joonshadow · 5 years

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"i'm not straight"

being in the closet isnt that much fun

namjoon comes out to the other members after hiding for so long.

/namjoon-centric fluff/

namjoon knew he wasn't straight for quite a while now but never told anyone, neither his family or his members. not because he wasn't sure about it, heck no, he knows for a hundred percent.

but coming out to yourself is really hard and coming out to everyone else in your life is even harder sometimes.

the leader always is open and accepting, never judging anyone. he has some not straight friends and loves them so much, couraging them to be open and happy. but being not straight himself is a bit different.

first, he could never be open about his sexuality to the whole world. its just the sad truth that an idol isn't supposed to be gay, they should be "normal" and appealing to their fans, who are mostly female.

which leads to the second reason; the hate.

as the leader of the group its his job to hold the members together and look after them. if he came out as gay, the media would go crazy and not just attack joon, but probably the whole group with hate and drama.

so no, being out and about isn't really an option for him. but for a while now he thought about telling his little "secret" to his members, his best friends who are like a second family for the boy.

turns out that trying to come out is nerve wracking as fuck.

all seven boys are cuddled up on the couch, watching a movie yoongi choose called "love simon" and eating popcorn.

namjoon is squished inbetween jungkook and hoseok, the youngest laying his head down on joons lap while his head is on hoseoks shoulders.

namjoons hands are sweaty, his heart is bumping hard in his chest and his throat is dry as hell. the blonde boy kept thinking over and over how he should say it but everytime he wants to say it out loud, he gets too scared.

its weird because he knows he will receive nothing but love and support from his friends, so he doesnt know why its so scary to actually tell them.

probably because his whole life, it was his little secret just for himself that no one else knew. so telling it someone else who obviously isnt him, is scaring the hell out of him.

and the time passes, the movie almost over and jungkook asleep on his thighs.

the first one to speak up wasnt namjoon, it was taehyung.

"i love this movie, its awesome. the two boys are so cute together!", the blue haired boy said with a sleepy voice and smiled at the other members, everyone agreeing with him instantly.

which makes joon incredibly happy. he doesn't know if its just something he feels or if its common among lgbt people, but everytime someone whos important to him says something accepting or nice about the community, his heart secretly bursts full of happiness in his chest.

"its late, we should sleep.", hoseok mumbled while carefully standing up, trying not to wake the youngest member up.

"youre right, hyung. do we have any schedules tomorrow?", asked jimin, who also was almost asleep next to jungkook.

seokjin told them all that they dont have anything planned for the next week since promotions are over and their tour starts in three weeks. everyone smiled because that means they would all be able to sleep as long as they want tomorrow.

namjoon brought some blankets from his room for jungkook who will sleep on the couch today because everyone is too tired and lazy to wake the youngest up and bring him to bed.

he carefully put them over him and tucked the sleeping boy in, kissing his head before turning off the tv and going out of the living room as quiet as possible.

seokjin and hoseok already dissapeared in their rooms, tired from practising their newest choreo all day long, while jimin and taehyung were in the bathroom and getting ready for bed.

namjoon did the same, telling the younger ones to sleep well and not to stay up too late before going to his room as well.

yoongi was his roommate, the two rappers sharing their room for quiet a while now.

the older boy was already in his bed when namjoon came in and crawled into his bed after changing into his pyjamas.

namjoon thought he was already asleep so he tried his best to be quiet and not make any noise to disturb the other. he almost fell asleep too before he heard some footsteps coming near his bed, his big blanket being held up and yoongi going under them.

it wasnt surprising since the two of them cuddle almost every night. but namjoon still got surprised as yoongi began to talk in a soft, calm voice.

"whats wrong, joon? i know somethings on your mind. you can talk to me, you know?"

is he that obvious? okay maybe he is a little bit tense lately, trying so hard to act normal but at the same time trying to find a good moment to tell his members about his sexuality.

after the movie was over today, he was kinda pissed at himself because he wasted such a good opportunity to tell them.

"i dont know what you mean, hyung. im just like always?"

yoongi sighed but besides that he just stayed silent. he softly caressed joons hair and waited for the younger boy to speak up when he is comfortable with doing so.

namjoons heart started to pound faster and he felt his hands getting sweaty again. maybe this was better than telling it everyone at once.

so he took a deep breath, tried to get his shit together and with a voice that yoongi almost wasnt able to hear, he finally said it out loud.

"im gay."

namjoon couldnt see yoongis reaction, wasnt able to read his face because it was pitch dark in their room and his back was turned towards the older one.

he started to breath faster, anxiety rising up in him because yoongi didnt say anything and for a second namjoon thought that he will hate him now.

but all his fears went away as yoongi wrapped his arms around namjoons waist and pulled him a little bit closer, giving him a soft kiss on his shoulder and smiled against his neck.

"hyung?"

"what?"

"arent you gonna say anything?"

"what should i say, joon? its no big deal,

i still love you. youre still the same person as before, you know?"

namjoon fell asleep a few minutes later with the biggest smile on his face.

"so for how long have you known?"

yoongi decided the morning after that just the two of them should sit together and talk a little bit. namjoon was more than okay with that which resulted in them sitting on yoongis bed, both with a cup of tea and surrounded by soft blankets and pillows.

namjoon told him everything, about how he found out and if he ever had a boyfriend, to which he sadly answered with a no.

"i dont know if anyone would every truly love me for who i am, you know what i mean?", namjoon said and looked down at his cup.

yoongi looked at the other boy and smiled softly, hitting his shoulder playfully.

"i bet youll find the perfect boy soon, joonie. dont worry too much about it."

this same afternoon namjoon decided that he should tell the other members too. it was unfair to just tell it yoongi and keep this big secret from everyone else.

its kinda hard to plan this kind of stuff since he is the type of person to back out on the last second. but after feeling so relieved from telling yoongi about his sexuality, he figured it wont be that bad to tell the others as well.

he went to seokjins and hoseoks room, knocking on the door twice and letting himself in after hearing a tired "yes?" from the inside.

there they were, sitting on their comfortable beds while probably scrolling through social media and stalking fan accounts. neither of them looked up, too concentrated on their phones and whats going on on the internet.

"hyung?"

both of them looked up after they heard namjoons quiet voice filled with anxiety, instantly putting away their phones and just focusing on him which, to be honest, didnt make this any easier.

"whats wrong, joon?", hoseok asks curious while standing up, taking his hand and pulling him over to seokjins bed.

hoseok sat right next to jin, which meant that namjoon is right in front of the two older boys.

nervously he was fiddling with his hands, taking a deep breath and thinking about what yoongi told him.

its no big deal,

youre still the same person as before

"i have something to say that i feel like you two should know, okay? its nothing big, at least thats what yoongi hyung says, but i just wanted you guys to kno-"

"are you gay or what?", hoseok said while letting out a small giggle, stopping the moment he saw namjoons surprised face.

"wait, youre really gay. holy shit, im sorry namjoon, i didnt mean to-"

"oh shut up hoseok, dont make this even more embarassing for yourself.", seokjin insisted and then just focused on namjoon, who was just hella surprised and a little bit shocked to be honest.

"yeah, im actually gay. thanks for ruining my big surprise", namjoon joked and smiled at hoseok, who still feels kinda bad and tightly holds joons hands in his.

the two older boys gave namjoon a big hug, telling him that theyll love and support him no matter what and reminded namjoon that theyre always here if he needs someone to talk to.

everything they said means a lot to joon and he is so happy to hear it, especially from the oldest member in the group. the two were always really close with each other so to know that seokjin still loves him just the way he is, means a lot.

"hyung?"

namjoon looked up from the pot with boiling hot water in it, making pasta for everyone or at least trying to. taehyung came into the kitchen and just silently started to cut the vegetables that joon already put out for cooking.

"whats up, tae?", joon asked while taking out spices from the cabin, tasting the sauce for the noodles before adding some more salt and pepper. hes not the best cook but still able to make simple pasta with tomato sauce without making everyone sick or burning down the kitchen.

taehyung put away the knife for cutting the veggies, puts his hands on joons shoulders and turns him around so that the two boys are facing each other.

"uh, taehyung? what are you doing?"

the younger one just hugged joon tight and buried his face in the taller ones neck, pulling him close. to say that namjoon was a little bit confused was an understatement.

taehyung began to speak quietly with a shy, almost embarassed voice against joons soft skin.

"i heard you, hobi hyung and jin hyung talk in their rooms. i shouldnt have listened, but i was so curious about what you guys were talking about. im so sorry, hyung."

he was a little bit confused but understood after a second whats going on.

"so you know?"

the blue haired boy nodded quickly and promised namjoon that he doesnt mind it at all and that hes still the best leader of the whole world to which namjoon just responded with a soft "thank you", a big smile and an even bigger hug.

the day is almost over, no one really did anything besides sleeping and eating all day long. days like these are much needed after stressful promotions and exhausting award shows.

the boys ate joons pasta for dinner, complimenting him on his "amazing" cooking skills and after that they all just dissapear in their rooms or somewhere else in the house.

it was already dark outside as namjoon sat down on their big couch, pulling his phone out and scrolling trough social media.

most of the fans dont know but all of the members love to look at all the different fan accounts and see what they say about their group. its fun.

around five minutes later he got a message from jimin.

jimin: hyung

jimin: do you want to watch a movie

jimin: just jungkook, yoongi and me

namjoon: sure

after hitting send, he made his way to jimins room, already hearing their voices and the tv playing in the background. he just went in there without knocking and got greeted by the sight of jimin making little ponytails with yoongis grey hair and jungkook eating leftover pasta from dinner.

"wow, looks like you guys are having a lot of fun without me", namjoon said laughing and just laid down on the bed next to jungkook.

"its boring just with yoongi hyung, most of the time he falls asleep during the movie and thats-"

"oh shut up, its not my fault that the movies you guys choose are always so boring."

both of them laughed after yoongi jokingly hit jimins arm, which hurt not even a little bit since he isnt really the strongest.

"what movie are we even watching today?"

"probably a bad love movie which jimin found on netflix after feeling lonely and sad again"

the next second jimin just deadass jumped on jungkook and both of them tried to push the other one down on the bed. jimin gave up a bit after since its unfair because jungkook is "way stronger and hes tickling him which is fucking unfair".

namjoon just laughs and sits a little bit closer to yoongi, the older one putting his arm around joons shoulders and pulling him even closer.

"guys, come on now. if you dont want me to fall asleep during the movie, we should start now and not just in a few hours when you two decided to calm down.", yoongi murmured kinda annoyed, he would probably rather be in his bed now.

after a few minutes the movie was playing on the big tv screen and all four of them cuddled up on jungkooks big bed.

namjoon couldnt hold back a small giggle after seeing that jimin chose 'titanic' and hearing yoongi and jungkooks annoyed sigh.

to be honest, it was actually really nice. a few minutes after the movie started, taehyung decided to join them too and just snuggled between jungkook and jimin.

yoongi couldnt hold back and after a while he was softly snoring on namjoons lap with messy hair and parted lips.

the younger one of the two just caresses the older ones hair, loving the way it feels between his fingers.

"did hyung fall asleep again?", jimin asked with not even a little bit of surprise in his voice.

namjoon just nodded without saying anything, he didnt want to wake up yoongi and taehyung, whos also sleeping in jungkooks arms.

maybe now is the right time to tell them too since they are the last ones who dont know about joons little secret yet. jimin is still looking at namjoon with sleepy eyes, smiling a bit.

"jimin, jungkook, i have to tell you guys something", namjoon whispered as quiet as possible, hoping the younger boys would understand him anyways since he would rather not say it twice.

"what is it?", asks jimin, now wide awake and looking at namjoon full of curiosity.

from jungkook he just heard a tired "hm?".

"im gay", he whispers softly.

he honestly expected to be more calm now considering he came out to so many people in such a short time. but hes still nervous, his heart beating fast and waiting for a reaction he already knows will be the same as all the others before.

"not surprising, hyung"

wait, what? namjoon was confused.

"what do you mean, jungkook?"

jimin just giggles and shrugs his shoulders. jungkook told him that it isnt really that big of a surprise since hes not that stupid and knows his hyungs well. namjoon wanted him to be a little bit more clear, so he explained why he always kinda knew that joonie isnt that hetero.

"you never had a girlfriend and neither do you really talk about girls the way, for example jimin, does. and since there were never any signs that youre straight, i just assumed you arent."

namjoon just laughs and sarcastically congrats jungkook on his smart brain and his skill on finding out peoples sexuality. jimin joins in too and after a bit they all just cant stop laughing.

both, taehyung and yoongi woke up from the noise, confused and tired.

"whats going on?", yoongi said so quiet that namjoon and the others almost didnt notice.

"namjoon hyung likes boys!"

after that, the three boys just started to laugh even harder, not even knowing whats so funny about the whole situation.

but theres one thing namjoon knows for sure.

and that is that hes genuinely happy right now, feeling so good after knowing that he doesnt have to hide anymore and that hes so so loved.

--------

you can find my other stories on wattpad @ smolouis

please leave feedback!!

#pls tell me how it is :((#namjoon 💞💞💞#bts #jimin #taehyung #ot7 #hoseok #yoongi #seokjin #jungkook #fanfic

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warmau · 6 years

Text

meet midnight!au x bts

aus about falling in love at midnight,,,dont know where it came from but this blog is basically a wasteland anyway might as well have fun w it!

namjoon

there’s never much to do past midnight in your apartment,,,,,to be honest you hate being awake at this hour

but you’re kind of a night owl

getting things done when it’s dark outside is sort of your thing and sitting at your desk with the light on

brooding over work you should have done a week ago

you’re upset that the window in your bedroom leads out to the next building

so you can’t even see much of the street or even the sky

you literally would have to climb out onto your fire escape to look up

and usually,,,,you wouldn’t entertain the idea of going out onto that old, rusty looking thing

but tonight you’re extra bored

so you do

the night air is a little cold - you regret not wearing more layers but climbing through the window was already hard enough

the fire escape makes some sounds as you settle down and get comfortable

and you’re half worried it’s going to give way and drop you three stories down

but it doesnt and you look up to the sky,,,,,,,where small specks of what could be dust or actual stars glitter

you hear another noise and look back down to see that,,,,,,,there’s someone climbing out of the window on the other house

the one thats right beside yours

a tall, slim looking silhouette makes it out and does exactly what you did

pushing his feet through the bars and sitting down to look up at the sky

you might be,,,,at most,,,,,six feet away from his fire escape and you wonder if he’s just as bored as you

“looking at the sky?”

you call out and he hears you, dropping his gaze from above

he shyly itches at the back of his neck when he realizes he’s got company

“sorta. i cant see it from my window so i have to come out here.”

“can’t sleep?”

he shrugs

“im trying to finish some work up,,,,,,im not a morning person.”

you chuckle,,,,,looks like you arent the only on in this city with a sleeping on time problem

it’s quiet for a moment but then you see that the boy across you has begun playing with a lighter

the small flame flicks for only a second before he lets it go

and when you see it spark up the little halo of light it produces shows off some of the features of the boy sitting across from you

he’s got a sharp jawline

that goes up into high cheekbones

his eyes are dark and whenever the flame lights up you can nearly see the line of orange fire within them

it’s getting colder by the minute,,,,but you’re entranced

“so what kind of work do you do?”

he puts the lighter down

“i write songs,,,,,,lyrics mostly.”

“id love to hear some.”

he tilts his head up and throws his hand over his back “i can go get my book if you want.”

“id love that’

you sit there,,,for god knows how long listening to him read from across the fire escape

and it’s only when it gets too cold to handle and that you realize it must be nearing some ungodly time do you part ways

and when you wake up the next morning,,,,you go out - tired onto your fire escape and are surprised to see what looks like a paper plane settled on the fire escape

you pick it up and unfold it

‘i didn’t get your name, but mine is namjoon. hope we can see each other again,,,,,,,maybe tonight?’

you smile and when midnight comes around again you open your window and see namjoon on the other fire escape

he’s playing with his lighter again and you think this time you’ll bring a blanket out so you won’t get cold

(and maybe ,,,, you know,,,, so you can spend some more time with him)

seokjin

you’ve been roommates with seokjin for at least two years now

you like his company a lot and unlike other roommates that you have,,,,he actually cleans up and cooks

and if anything,,,,all your friends who have met him also adore him (a little too much you might even add)

the only person who seokjin doesn’t get along with is your boyfriend

who rubbed him the wrong way from the moment they met

and everytime you go out and tell seokjin it’s with him, seokjin makes a bit of a face

and says “if he does anything - you tell me right away.”

you used to roll your eyes, tell seokjin that your boyfriend isn’t all that bad

that seokjin was being overprotective for no reason at all

but then,,,,you found out your boyfriend was planning on breaking up with you - just after your anniversary

you’d had a big fight about it,,,your boyfriend had tried to lie but you had evidence that he had been planning it

and when all was said and done,,,,,your boyfriend,,,well ex now,,,,had said something that was so painful

that no matter how much you told yourself NOT to cry on the bus ride back home

when you got off at the stop,,,,the sky was pitch black and no one was out so you let yourself just ball your eyes out

the only problem was,,,whenyou opened the door to your apartment seokjin was still up

you’d expected he’d be in bed,,,he had work down at his restaurant tomorrow

but he was sitting on the couch - some shitty drama re-running on tv

and when he saw you,,,,,,,

the bowl of popcorn fell from his lap as he got up, coming toward you so fast you nearly blinked and he was already holding you in his arms

your face snug in the front of his shirt - soaking it through with your tears

his hand settled on the small of your back

he spoke against the shell of your ear

“what did he do? do i have to kill him?”

you brought your hands around him, bunching up the back of his shirt in your fists as you just cried

seokjin didn’t let you go, not even when you started sliding down toward the floor - weak from crying

he simply picked you up in his arms and let you cuddle close against him when he put you down on your bed

“don’t go” you whispered and he nodded

racking his fingers through your hair and whispering softly till there were no more tears left inside of you to cry

when he felt that you’d stopped shaking, seokjin let you go gently

he let your head rest on the pillow and he brought the blankets up to cover you

and although you hadn’t fallen asleep yet,,,,seokjin must have assumed you had

because cautiously you felt him kiss the middle of your forehead

whisper against it that no one deserved someone like you,,,,,,,he himself didnt

even if he had wanted you so bad for so long

when he’d gotten up to shuffle out of the room , you’d opened your eyes

touching the skin of your forehead still warm from his lips

and after only a moment to think it over

you got out of bed, making your way into the living room were seokjin was cleaning up after himself

and he turned- shocked and about to ask if everything was alright

when you pressed up close to him, taking his face in your hands and going

“seokjin,,,,,,,,it’s me who doesn’t deserve you.”

the words fall from your lips and before anything else seokjin kisses them

kisses you and kisses you murmuring in between that he’d do anything for you to know,,,,how much he loves you,,,,,,,and how much he’s wanted this

yoongi

you hate working the graveyard shift at the local diner

half because you never know what weirdo is going to walk through the door,,,,,and the other half because it gets so empty and boring

and the kitchen staff don’t bother making conversation with you anyway

so you’re stuck,,,,,waiting till someone comes by

and it’s a particularly rainy night on this shift

you watch the rain accumulate on the window near one of the booths and sigh

praying silently that the rain will stop by the time you have to leave

you almost jolt when the little bell chimes and in walks a lonely looking boy

his head is hidden by a hood much too large for him and in his left hand is a notebook and a couple of wads of cash

“just one?”

you ask cautiously,,,,worried about this persons intentions

until he looks up and you’re thankful that he looks about your age and tired more than menecing

he nods

and when you seat him beside a booth he takes one glance at the menu and then orders coffee, black and asks for an extra pen if you have one

you give him the pen you keep in your aprons pocket and then go back to get the coffee

it’s nearing midnight now,,,,so you’re not sure why he’d want to drink coffee

but either way you slide the mug down on the table and notice that he’s pulled out his notebook

turning past pages and pages of what looks like stanzas of poetry

the boy takes a sip of his coffee and lays out his money flat on the table

and then,,,,he starts to write

for a while you try to ignore him but he’s the only interesting person,,,,,well he’s the only person at all that’s in the diner

and before you can help yourself you’re sliding into the booth across from him and asking if it’s ok if you sit here

he looks up at you for a moment - but nods

only a minute has to pass before he goes “are you going to ask me what im writing about?”

you shift, your uniform suddenly feels a little too tight for comfort

“wow,,,,can you read my mind?” you chuckle and he shrugs “there’s nothing else to ask a stranger is there?”

you blink, but nod slowly

“im writing poetry,,,,,,im not very good at it.”

he taps his pen against the page and then flicks his eyes up to meet yours

“do you write?”

you shake your head,,,,the sound of the rain on the window matches the speed of his tapping

“why not?”

“why not what?”

“why don’t you write?”

you laugh in response and it makes the boy raise an eyebrow

“i dont have the talent.”

he grins at this, the first real sign of emotion on his face

“me either, but here i am.”

you two talk a little more about poetry,,,,he introduces himself as yoongi and you think that’s quite a unique name. you tell him it’ll make a good poets name

yoongi finds that funny as well

around an hour in some more customers come in,,,mostly security guards or construction workers who work odd hours

you get a little busy with them

but then it dies down and you find yourself with yoongi again

he checks his watch and frowns

“ive got to get going, i have a pretty early class. but here, i wrote this for you.”

he tears a page from his notebook and hands it to you. he motions to the money on the table

it’s far too much for a cup of coffee but yoongi tells you to keep the change as a tip

he liked talking to you

when he leaves you look down at the page,,,,,it’s a simple poem

and when you read it ,,,, you realize that it’s a poem about you

about you in this diner ,,,,, and you look back out the window

the rain has stopped but its still pretty dark out

you can make yoongi’s figure out crossing the street and for some reason you wave at it

you’re shocked when the figure of his stops and he waves back

,,,,,,,,,,,yoongi comes back the next night and suddenly you think the graveyard shift isn’t too bad

hoseok

there’s a lot of people cramped into the small space where the show is being held

usually you like a crowd,,,,but this is a lot

and to be fair you were dragged here by a friend - not because you really even know or like the band at all

but your friend is head over heels for the lead singer

and so you’re there to be moral support

at least you were ,,,,,,,,,,, until you see him

he’s grinning when he gets on stage

he slaps the back of the bass player and chugs a part of a beer that someone in the crowd hands him

he’s all smiles and cheers and you’re almost shocked that he isn’t the lead singer

he’s the drummer

he pulls back his bangs from his eyes with one hand, the other holds his sticks as he gets comfortable behind the drums

his body is lean, but muscular and the tank he’s wearing is slit at the arms so with one turn you can see his chest and toned arms

you lean over to your friend and ask “whose that?”

she jumps up and down, eyes directed only at the singer at the mic

“whose who?”

“the drummer?”

“oh! jung hoseok,,,,,he’s like a wild party boy or something.”

she talks fast, distracted by the other man in front of her but you just keep looking at the person behind him

the person behind the drums

and for a moment hoseok locks eyes with you

his are brown,,,,but they’re special - they’re lit up like those of a lion

you’ve never been so electrified by someones gaze

and then he shoots you a half smile, his teeth glittering in the harsh light on the stage

the set starts and the music is loud and frenzied,,,,very punk with undertones of romantic pop

it makes no sense but you feel it ,,,,,, but most of all you feel hoseok

because you’re close to the stage, so close that you’re sure he’s burrowing holes into you with his eyes

you might not admit it,,,but you make a little show for him

pretending to sing along, running your hands through your hair, you’re focused on keeping that attention

and it works

when the set ends and the next band goes up on stage

hoseok, sweaty and panting gets up from the drums - locks eyes with you a tilts his head to signal that you meet him outside

you tell your friend you’ll be back,,,,,but that’s a hard maybe

because as soon as you’re outside

in the dark, cold night

hoseok is there - leaning against the back wall in the alley outside of the venue

and you don’t even have to think twice

when he beckons you over

and smiles in the dark, putting a hand in your hair and combing it through

“is this your first show?”

“not at all”

his grin gets wider, “yeah, i could tell.”

he looks even better up close,,,,it takes time but your eyes adjust and you see how pretty his skin is - still covered a little in sweat, sleek and glowing

“so, did you like it? the music, i mean. i know you liked me.”

hoseok flirts and you give a little, cute shrug of your shoulders

“wasn’t paying attention too much to the music,,,,my mind was somewhere else.”

hoseok makes a low sound of surprise,,,,,,but lets his hand tilt your chin up

“it’s ok, we’re not in everyones taste. but im glad im in yours.”

“we’ll see about that.”

there’s only a moment before you two are kissing, rough and raw and then you pull back to get a good look at him again

you notice he has a tattoo that dips down his ribs and another that hides over the hem of his belt

you put your hand there

“can i see?”

he chuckles “getting right to the point are we? i guess ill let you have a look but,,,,,,not in this shitty back alley.”

with that hoseok throws an arm around you, he pulls you flush against his side and you lean up to kiss right below his jaw

you guys saunter off into the night,,,,,but you make sure to text your friend an apology later on hehe

jimin

you like going to the movies alone

which in some cases freaks people out because movies are supposed to be a social event

but you’re like no. if im paying twenty bucks for a ticket im going alone so i can focus on the movie,,,,,not having a conversation with a friend or making out with someone

the only problem is,,,,it’s pretty hard to see a movie alone

the theater is usually packed

and so your only options are either going super early in the morning or super late at night

and since the morning one is hard,,,,,,afterall you do have things to do other than that

you always pick the super late night screening if you can

and usually there’s maybe a max of five people there - which is a nice comfortable number for you

but tonight there’s only one other person

which you’re even better with

the only thing is,,,,,this person must be a lot like you

because he’s sitting in your favorite row - the best row in your opinion for watching the movie

and like you,,,,he’s even brought his own hidden snacks in the waistband of his sweats

you take a seat,,,,four or five chairs away from him

he doesn’t turn to look at you and maybe you’re happy that you and this one other movie-goer have silently agreed not to bother one and other

but,,,,,something about him is just so,,,,,,,curious

for one,,,,he’s wearing a mask inside,,,,,where there’s only one other person

he even has a cap on too

maybe he has cold? you think to yourself

but whatever it is,,,,you can’t believe it,,,,,,that this one person is distracting you

you try hard to look at the screen - hope the movies plot will save you

but it turns out that it’s just another crappy indie romance film and you’re like ,,,,,,,,, not at all impressed

the person doesn’t seem to be either, he suddenly turns to you and shrugs

he says something but because of the mask you cant hear him so you motion for him to take it off

he hesitates, but does it and goes

“it’s kind of boring, huh?”

you nod but you’re trying to make sure if you’re seeing right

because the person in front of you is,,,,,,,,park jimin

park jimin of bangtan

his face is on a poster for LG right outside the movie theater

you try not to act too shocked, you just go “this director is kind of known for this boring romantic stuff.”

he looks a little surprised and suddenly is moving his seat to be closer to you

“i dont see a lot of movies,,,,,my job gets in the way of that. do you have any recommendations?”

you try to calm your heart - you’ve never been this close to someone this famous before

and you dont want to come off as a wild fan or anything so you’re trying to carry on a totally normal conversation

giving him a list of recent ones that you liked and explaining that this time is the best - there’s usually maybe only a couple of people here so there’s no background noise or whatever

jimin nods and sits back against the chair

he looks up and the scene in the movie is that of the main pair kissing

he sighs and you still cant believe that it’s him,,,,,it’s really him

“this is going to sound crazy but i havent kissed someone in years”

he suddenly breathes and you blink

“o-oh, why not?”

“my job sort of ,,,,, doesn’t like it if i date.”

“ah,,,” you pretend to know what that feels like,,,,,you’re just single of your own free choice

it must be hard for him

suddenly jimin turns to you and even in the dark movie theater you can tell he’s flustered

“was that awkward of me to say, im sorry-”

“no no it’s fine. im sorry your job seems so strict”

he sighs again, taking his cap off and running his hands through his hair

“it’s a job i love, so it’s ok.”

his voice trails off and the scene on the screen just gets more romantic to the point where even you look down

until you hear jimin’s voice, quiet and low

“i forgot what that all feels like,,,,,,,”

you turn to him and jimin meets your gaze

for a moment he just maps your face out with his eyes and then swallows a bit

“are you currently dating someone?”

you shake your head, your palms are sweating from the way jimin is looking at you

and suddenly you can tell what he’s going to ask next

so without a complaint you nod “yes, you can kiss me.”

he smiles, leaning in and for a second you don’t care that this is THE park jimin of bangtan

because you’ve missed kissing too,,,,,even if it’s hard to admit that

and before you know it your hand is in his hair and you’ve moved your seat into that of his lap

and you’re thankful for your trips this late at night to the movies

because you’re kissing jimin even as the credits behind you roll

taehyung [tw: drinking]

working out is always a bummer for you

especially working out in font of people - like it might just be in your head but it feels like people stare

so you opt for running beside the river at night

its dangerous,,,,,maybe,,,,,but it’s more comfortable for you and usually you get lost in your music anyway

you’re almost halfway done with your run when you notice there’s someone by the river

he’s dancing around, spinning in circles with some sort of music of his own blasting from his phone in his back pocket

you think that you’d better avoid this guy,,,,,,he looks like he’s trouble

but when you want to start running the other way you notice him stumble, almost right into the rail separating him from the river

you skid to a stop, the moral part of you nagging that you better go see if he’s alright

as you come closer you see that it’s not some old weird man like you’d dreaded - but instead a boy who looks like he’s in his early twenties

he’s dressed rather nice, pretty earrings swinging from his ears everytime he twirls every which way

and when he catches your gaze he breaks out into an even bigger smile

“well hellllllooooo, do you want to dance?”

he outstretches his hand and you just look at it

“are you ok? i saw you almost trip over the rail-”

“i am not ok, i am taehyung and i am fantastic ,,,,,,,,,,,and you are rather lovely actually”

he stops dancing and comes closer to look at you

you look at him, smelling the scent of a bit of alcohol off him

“are you drunk?”

“tipsy, i can think straight don’t worry”

he giggles and does another turn, offering his hand once again

“so, dance?”

you shake your head pointing over your shoulder “actually, i better finish my run”

“dancing is MUCH better exercise. especially if two beautiful people dance together.”

he grins and starts to sway again

you feel awkward now,,,,telling yourself off for sticking your nose into something

but then taehyung takes your hand while you’re in thought and twirls you around, dipping you by the waist before you can even catch your breath

“well, you know my name, tell me yours”

you fret a bit, stuttering it out

“pretty name, pretty face - do you really not want to dance a little with me?”

he lets you go and waits for an answer

you know you should just say no and go on with your run

but something about this taehyung is enchanting,,,,like his eyes are sparkling with something magic

you sigh, “im not good at it - be warned”

he claps and takes your hands in his “ill teach you”

you let taehyung spin you around, lead you and then he pulls you close as his hands are in yours and the song on his phone turns slow

“do you like to waltz?”

“i,,,i dont dance i said that-”

he lowers his lips closer to your ear

“it’s a shame, pretty people should love dancing. it makes them even prettier.”

you feel your heart jump into your throat and then taehyung is letting you go to point up

“look at the moon”

you look up and taehyung sighs “she’s shining down just for us.”

you want to say that that’s a bit romantic of a thing to say to a stranger,,,,but when you catch taehyung’s beautiful profile against the moonlight shimmer

you keep the thought to yourself

and taehyung and you dance a little more into the night

jungkook

to say it’s been a hard week is an understatement

it’s been damn near hellish

everything seems to be going wrong and you don’t know how to control it anymore

so you’ve been doing the only thing that comforts you just a little bit,,,,,,eating your favorite takeout

actually,,,,you’ve eaten it seven days in a row

and each time you order it at like midnight and the same delivery boy shows up

his dark hair sticking out of his helmet, his big eyes wide whenever you open the door and sluggishly hand him the money

on the eighth day of ordering the same thing at the same late time

the delivery boy drops the bag in your hands but asks

“are you ok?”

you sigh, leaning against your door and shaking your head

“no,,,,,,but whats the point of telling a stranger”

he shrugs “getting things off your chest can really help.”

you look at him, reading for the first time in a week what his nameplate says

“well jungkook,,,,,it’s been really shitty”

you sigh and he unclips his helmet, taking it off and shaking his hair

when he looks at you again you have to say,,,,the helmet does him no justice

without it he’s like ten thousand times cuter

and you feel ten thousand times more embarrassed about complaining to the damn delivery boy about how bad life is

but he doesn’t seem phased at all, he just leans on the wall across from your door and crosses his arms

“life is always though, but there’s nothing to do but stay positive.”

you know he’s right but you shrug at it “i dont think theres much to be positive about,,,,,,,,,except food”

you lift the bag with a grin “this always makes me happy”

jungkook laughs and uncrosses his arms

“well then im happy to deliver it to you forever if it makes you happy.”

you flush a little at that, looking down at your feet wishing you werent wearing your old pj’s in front of him all of a sudden

he must have seen you at your utter worst this week

but he’s still there beaming at you, the watch on his hand ticking past midnight

“i dont want to take anymore of your time,,,,” you start but jungkook shrugs

“it’s fine, this place is a five minute bike away from the resturant”

your eyes widen “you ride a bike,,,,,not like a motorcycle or something?”

jungkook laughs into his palm “i wish! unfortunately i only have a bike,,,,,,,”

he thinks for a second

“do you want to take a late night ride? my boss hasnt called me about any other orders?”

you put the bag of food inside your apartment and grab your keys from the wall

“id love that”

you find yourself on the handlebars of jungkook’s bike,,,,which he’s had since he was like fifteen by the way

the night air whips past your face as jungkook pedals you around the neighborhood and you feel alive for the first time in a while

jungkooks warm hands over yours on the handlebars

when he gets you home, you hop of and thank him - red in the face from the wind and from screaming of fear when jungkooks bike almost tipped

he grins, telling you it’s nothing

and that the only payment he needs from you is for the food (obviously) and maybe a kiss on the cheek as a tip

880 notes · View notes

xiaojusaur · 6 years

Text

Beta Affair Pt. 4

I felt like updating today! So here’s part 4! I hope you guys like it!!

1 2 3 4

Today was the day of the convention. You were kinda jumpy because you were excited, but you were trying to conceal it since it was your nature to not show your feelings.

Nikky said “Why are you so hyper? Calm down please.”

Emmy laughed at you and said “Aww! Leave her alone, she’s seeing her Taehyung today.” She made emphasis on his name.

You scuffed “Girls! Stop! I’m just going to a convention with him. Nothing extraordinary, just two random people going to a videogames convention. We might even fight and all.”

“Yeah, a kiss fight maybe,” said Aria.

You rolled your eyes and went to get dressed. Your choice of clothes for today were comfy but pretty. Some high-waisted jeans and a turtle neck, along with some Converse. To try to look decent, you decided to apply some makeup on.

When you went out of your room, your friends were all waiting for you. They all had smirks on their faces, you knew already what they were thinking. “I don’t wanna hear it!” You heard them giggle behind your back.

Amy said “Hey, you look pretty! Are we ready to go?”

“I think so, yeah,” you said kinda nervous. “Let me text him to check if he arrived.”

You: Hey, are you there already?

He replied almost instantly, as if he was waiting for your text.

Tae: Yeah, I’m waiting for you.

You: Then I’m on my way to kick your ass.

Tae: We’ll see about that.

“He’s there, let’s go!” You said all excited, grabbing Emmy by her wrist.

Nikky said “Someone’s excited. I swear if you don’t at least kiss today I’m gonna make it happen.”

You started thinking about that. What if you guys had to kiss? What if he wanted to kiss you? It’s not like you don’t wanted it to happen, but just the mere thought of his lips getting closer and touching yours was giving you chills. What if everything went wrong and you mess up the kiss?

When you came back to reality you saw Aria waving a hand in front of you “Hello? Earth to Y/N? Are we going or not?”

You shook your head “Y-yeah! What are we waiting for?!” You all walked outside to wait for the bus.

You guys were at the entrance of the place. The moment of truth hit you and suddenly you started panicking. “I don’t think this was a good idea… Let’s go back!”

“What are you saying?! We traveled thirty minutes for you to say you don’t want to enter?! You better get your ass in there or else I’m going to kick you!” said Caroline.

“Ugh fine!”

When you were about to enter you texted him again

You: Im here

Tae: Where? I’m gonna look for you

You: Catch me if you can!

Tae: Don’t play this game with me. Come to me if you see me first.

Why were you nervous? It was just a normal date with Taehyung. You needed to calm down, but the fact that you were going to see him any time now was making you anxious. Your eyes were everywhere when you entered, trying to spot him but there was a lot of people! Most of them were playing in some big TV’s while they had and audience screaming for their favorite.

You heard your friends giggling behind your back and when you were about to turn around, someone covered your eyes with their hands. By the length of the hands you already knew who it was.

“Taehyung I know it’s you,” you said with a fake annoyed voice.

He uncovered your eyes and you turned around to be greeted by his beautiful boxy smile. He hugged you tightly and this time, you hugged him back. He smelled really nice and you took your time to enjoy the scent.

“I found you quickly, you see?” He said with his beautiful deep voice.

“I see. Did they kick your ass already?” you asked trying to conceal your nerves.

“Not yet, I was waiting for you to do the honors.”

Aria suddenly reminded you they were there by saying “We’re gonna walk around, text if you need us.” And with that, they were gone, leaving you alone again.

Taehyung was looking at you when you looked at him. “Why are you staring? That’s rude.”

“I’m not staring, I’m just admiring your beauty.” Here we go again! He starts flirting with you and you start blushing while trying to deny that you like him too.

“Let’s see if we can find any free spot to play, so you could ‘kick my ass’ like you said,” he said, making the quotations with his fingers.

“I will kick your ass, don’t underestimate me, sir.”

“We’ll see about that.” He smirked!

You guys found a free console with Smash Bros in it. He sat on one of the chairs, inviting you to the other. “Do you know how to play this or is this where I kick your ass?”

You scuffed “Of course I know how to play this, who doesn’t know?” The truth is you did know how to play, you just weren’t a master in it so the chances of getting your ass kicked were high. Still, you decided to give it a try. He passed you the controller, you picked your character and quickly the game started. As expected, he was a master in it and he beat you. He started laughing and you laughed with him but also rolled his eyes.

“You were saying?” He said looking at you with a smirk.

“Oh shut up!” You pushed him playfully. “Look for something I play and see me kick your ass.”

You started walking around, looking for a free spot and also watching other people play. It was a fun day already.

Taehyung walked you where his friends were. You were shocked to see they were all attractive! You couldn’t stop looking at them. Taehyung noticed and said jokingly “Stop looking at them like that, I might get jealous.”

He introduced you to them “Hey guys! This is the girl I talked to you about, Y/N.” They all put their eyes on you and smiled. The one that was playing said without taking his eyes off the game “Hey! You’re the ass kicker? Nice to meet you! I want to play a match with you so stay around please.”

You looked at Taehyung and he smiled to you, leaving you breathless. You guys waited for Jungkook to finish and then he lend you his remote. You sat by his side and with an evil smirk you said “Im gonna kick your ass!”

“Suuure!” he said sarcastically.

You guys started the match and after a few minutes, you won. You screamed “HAH! I TOLD YOU!!” He started laughing, making you swoon on the inside, the sound of his laugh was the best.

Jungkook then asked to play a match with you and you kindly accepted. This time, you lost but it was okay, he was a master in this.

Taehyung placed his hand gently on your shoulder and said “Should we walk around again?”

“Sure! Let’s go.” Then you look at the other guys and said “It was nice meeting you!”

You and Tae were walking around, seeing the different booths and stuff when suddenly you felt his hand touching yours. The butterflies in your stomach started dancing instantly. He slid his hand in yours slowly, like asking silently to interwine his fingers with yours. Of course, you let him and suddenly you were holding hands. Your hand was small inside of his, but he held it cautiously, almost shyly. His hand was warm and soft, making you want to hold it forever.

You started blushing furiously and he noticed it because he smirked. You tried to hold your laugh but he also noticed it and said “I can let go if you want,” trying to unhand you but you almost ripped his wrist, holding his hand tightly. He hummed and said “I see. Can we talk about this?”

You tried to play the fool and asked “”About what?” He just answered raising your holding hands. You rolled your eyes and started laughing.

“Im being serious, Y/N. We need to talk about our feelings.”

“Just let me think about what I feel okay? I’m not sure of what Im feeling.”

“How arent you sure? Youre holding my hand. If you didnt want me, you wouldve let go a while ago.”

“I just like the feeling of your hand, okay? It’s nice.” You said holding a laugh and he laughed with you.

You were walking near a hidden hallway, guessing there were the bathrooms of the place, when out of nowhere Tae pulled you to it, making your back crash on the wall. He was now pinning you against the wall, each of his arms on each side of your head. You were sure you were hyperventilating now.

“Stop playing tough, I know what you’re doing.” he said, the breeze that emits his words hitting your face. His breath smelled like mint, making you want to kiss him.

“Oh yeah? And what is it that I’m doing?” You played the fool.

“Y/N, I know this may be the first you feel something like this but please, you need to be as clear as water with me. Do you like me?” His eyes were fixed on yours, expecting your answer.

“Taehyung I- I- I dont know.” you stuttered. You blushed because he was so close and he was making this questions, expecting you to answer right away. What if this was just something platonic? You were really sure that you liked him, hell! He made you feel things you havent felt before but what if after your dreams came true, he just disappears? Or what if you didnt feel the same spark again?

He didn’t let you think though, he started getting closer and closer to your mouth. You couldn’t think fast so you just let it happen. His perfect lips touched yours in a gentle kiss. You were in shock, you couldn’t move. Meanwhile he was pressing his lips on yours like if he had been waiting his whole life for this, with his eyes closed. You couldn’t close yours because of the shock, but you finally relaxed and eased into it, placing your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. His hands held you by the waist, pushing you to the wall bur his body was all over yours. If you got any closer, you’ll have to merge into one. His lips were soft and warm and it seemed like if he stopped breathing just to savour the moment.

After a little while, he pulled away, looking deep into your eyes. “What do you feel now?” He said with a breathy tone, giving you goosebumps, not letting you process what just had happened.

“Taehyung, I like you. Heck I do! But I dont know if this would work. I mean, you’re from the other side of the world, we basically just met. I feel so much for you, like... I get a kaleidoscope of butterflies in my stomach everytime I see you, you held my hand and I just wanted you to hold me forever, and now you just kissed me and wow! I-” he interrupted you again, with another kiss. He pecked your lips sofly.

“That’s a nice way of telling me to shut up,” you smiled.

“Just let me love you, Y/N. Enjoy the moment while it last, we’ll make it work someway.” He said while hugging tightly. His arms were the safest place to be. “Now stop playing hard to get and kiss me.” He was holding you close and was about to kiss you again but you started laughing.

“Are we gonna spend the rest of the day here? In a sketchy hallway, kissing each other?” you asked jokingly. “If that’s what you want, why not? I could kiss you for hours and not get tired of your lips.” His confession made you blush. You just couldn’t believe yet that this was happening.

“Im joking. Let’s go around.” He took your hand in his, like if this was normal already and you started walking around.

★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★ ・・・・・・ ★・・・・ ★

At the end of the day you were with Taehyung and his friends. Your friends were gone to go eat and, as always, left you alone. Jungkook was the winner of the Overwatch tournament and you guys went to a restaurant to celebrate. There you hung out with the guys and got to meet them a little. Some of them were drunk already and were making jokes while laughing hard. Taehyung didnt drink, so he was okay, he was all into you.

You guys couldnt stop looking at each other and he won’t let go of your hands. Drunk Jimin started making fun of you two, “Look at them. They look like lovebirds.” He was giggling cutely.

Jungkook took the chance too, “They won’t even get their hands off each other. I don’t want to imagine what would happen if we leave them alone.”

“Nothing! Taehyung is a chicken!” said Yoongi laughing while looking at Tae.

“Come on guys! Leave them alone! They are in love, that’s normal,” said Namjoon, acting like the father of the group. “Yah! Taehyungie! Safety always you know. If you need anything let me know,” said Jin while holding a laugh.

Suddenly your phone started ringing. It was Nikky: “Yo’ bitch! Where the fuck are you? We want to go already, we’re tired. Unless you’re getting the D.”

You started laughing. “No, Im not! We were eating, I’ll be on my way.”

After you hung up you told Tae “I need to go, my friends are tired.”

“It’s okay! I’ll take you to them,” he said while caressing your hair.

After saying your goodbyes to the drunken friends, you both headed out for where your friends were. They weren’t far from where you guys were, so you went walking, hand in hand of course.

“So did you have fun?” he asked, trying to make conversation. “Yeah, it was an interesting day,” you said and loo up at him. He smiled and you smiled back. “So? When are we going to see each other again?” “Whenever you want... you still have time here, dont you?” “Yeah, I’ll visit you. Or if you want, you can come to my hotel room.” “I’ll try to visit you.” You held his hand tightly. You could already see your friends’ faces while watching you being hand in hand with Tae. You were trying not to laugh.

You said hello as if nothing was happening, they were just in shock.

“Sooo... we leaving? Im sleepy,” said Nikky.

“Sure, let’s go.”

They also didnt expect what happened next: You hugged Taehyung tightly and without thinking, you crashed your lips with his. He placed his hands on your hips and pulled you to him.The kiss turned a little passionate.

While you guys were kissing, your friends were looking at each other confused, shocked but nevertheless, proud of you.

A little later, you guys pulled away, both with rossy cheeks. “Goodnight, see ya later.” He said while cupping your face and planting a kiss on your forehead. When you turned to your friends, they were all smirking. “What?” you said holding a laugh.

“I see you’re improving...” said Aria.

★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★ ・・・・・・ ★・・・・ ★

You were about to go to sleep when your phone rang, it was Taehyung

Tae: Thanks for spending time with me today, it was fun <3 I still cant get off my mind your lips ;) Sleep well princess, see you soon.

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thegr8nana-blog · 5 years

Text

we’re only getting older, baby

looking back again when i was still lost, and feeling empty most of the time. i try to search for such an inner peace to keep me happy and ease at all time. thought it could be in a form of music, passions and interest.

never have i ever knew, it comes in a human form.

i never planned to love you this much, i told myself that whatever happens, self love is my priority. but things changed, so does this rule. i break my rule for you, but its alright, this time, its legal. loving you might seems illegal because, i get high on your love, like a drug, i’m addicted to it. if someone ever come and ask me “what is love for you?” my answer would be the descriptions of your look and everything about you. people might say, love is wide, its abstract, but for me, love is simple, love is you.

days passed by, things have changed. we are busy with things that sometimes, pulling us away from each other. we sometimes fight over things that are not meant to be fight for, we sometimes mad over things that probably can be settle down less in few seconds, we sometimes cried over issues that we both are clueless of, we sometimes hate, each other. things might get shittier every day and these shits might affect us, but little do you know, that the love i have for you, would always remain the same and fresh, like how i felt on the first day i saw you, i swear.

you’re my perfection. i tried to keep my shits together in life so that, i’ll have a perfect one to live, but its crazy how, you have showed me on what the word perfect means, just by looking at you. i would experienced this one feeling of calm, whenever i look at you. i couldnt resist it, it feels like i’m in the right hands. it feels like home.

couldnt stop my tears from rolling on this cheeks, everytime the thought being apart from you soon, crossed on my mind. i’ve created thousands of beautiful moments with you, i’ve walked the days of laughing with you, i’ve passed the days of saying goodbye to you and i’ve survived the days of we’re not talking to each other even a single word. spending days with you, are the highlight of my life, i would not forget each and every of it, i’ll treasure it, till the last breath of mine.

i could not explain exactly, the affection i have for you. i do give the love i have in me, to others too, but when it comes to you, its different. you might have receive enough love and attention from your significant one, that sometimes, i feel like, you might not notice of how great i am of being a giver and a lover. but that’s not my point, the aim i have is clear, which is to make you feel loved and important. no one else can have, the part of me i gave to you ika.

there might be time where i dont actually feel good about things, where i choose to isolate myself and cried over shits i dont discuss, there might be time where you think its better for me to tell and share the struggle im in right now to you, but the reason why i dont feel like telling is because, i dont want you to see the poor side of mine, its not that i do not want to admit that im weak, but its because, i want you to only see the big and strong love i’ve offer you, is indeed strong and not weak. but dont you worry, even if i’m at my lowest point, i promise, this broken heart, will love you wholeheartedly.

when i am no longer with you, always remember that, if we dont talk everyday, doesnt mean we arent friends anymore. i understand that we both have separate lives and working on ourselves. just know that i’ll be there in a split second the moment you need me.

lastly, i hope you’ll enjoy this big & important day of yours, i wish you the best in life ika, i hope youre always happy where youre at and i hope you will find someone who can put up with everything. i know that i wasnt the one but i’ll pray for you.

i love you so much, i will never not love you.

happiest 19th zulaikha adriana.

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parkjmini · 6 years

Text

bts as fuckboys

[a/n]: inspired by @sweetersuga | original post: x i wrote it as the perspective that you’re already close friends w them/have been with them before !!

Seokjin

he’s the funny, sarcastic one where he could be kind of mean bc he takes it a lil far

“you’re such trash you sleep with every girl”

“at least I can get someone to sleep with me”

he flashes a smile in the hall bc he KnOws iT GeTs oN YouR NeRveS

“When’s my birthday”

“January 1st bc u set off my fireworks baby”

“i am disgusted”

piggy back rides on those goddamn strong broad set of shoulders ooffff

“I’ll call you, ya?”

He never calls u bc he probably forgot too busy improvin himself

you have a streak with him and all he sends are selfies with the caption “I hope your day is as beautiful as I am (:”

He catches you staring in class one day and he’s like “take a pic, it’ll last longer babe”

And omg he ACTUALLY TELLS YOU TO TAKE A PHOTO OF HIM

so now u have a gallery full of jin and he wont let u delete them bc he thinks they’re all masterpieces you do too but youd never admit it

the only fuckboy that’s tolerable bc he’s rlly just a big goof

“why don’t you ever have sleeves on your shirt jin”

“these shoulders are on display, honey, can’t cover up the jewels”

he’s kind of obnoxiously loud that u want to shove ur fist into his mouth to sh u t him uP

“dude, jimin’s hot”

“okay but so am i ??”

“ok ya youre really hot but so is jimin”

“jiMIN (Y/N) THINKS YOU’RE—-”

“–ANNOYING THANKS SEOKJIN PLS SHUT UP WHY R U STILL TALKING WOW”

“just trying to get my baby some more dick jeEZ”

Yoongi

“hey yoongs why dont we go on a date??”

“uuhhhhhh since when were we dating? lmao dont trip”

gets a new number every 2 months bc he loves fucking w them crazy bitches too much

“sometimes you need to mess around with the ones who can bite off your dick, being risky is hot (-;”

“BEinG riSkY iS hOt ya u wont have a penis anymore at the rate you’re going”

kind of smells like a mixture of alcohol and cologne

hand-on-ass-when-he-hugs

“let’s play a game, if u lose u have to take off ur clothes, if i lose u have to take off ur clothes”

“wait but yours stay on ?? wtf yoongi??”

“no mine will come off right after i see u naked (;”

the one to play with the ends of your skirt/dress/shirt bc it gets u so flustered and he lives seeing u flustered

straight up Arrogantᵀᴹ at times its hot but ur so annoyed by it that u wanna knock some sense into him

wont ask for nudes but will ask to see some goods

“can i see ur tits”

“for the 4039th time, no”

“well, a man can try”

SMIRKY MC SMIRKY HERE like it just comes OUT of NOWHERE and it is OUT to ATTAC

u dont have a snap streak w him bc it always breaks bc he replies every 3 years bc he was “busy”

but he’s always the fourth person to like your instagram posts???????

and to comment the water droplet/eye/tongue emoji combo ????

loves when u swat his hands away from gripping your thigh

Hoseok

(i wanted to use this gif but it was so big and rectangle and didnt fit but u need to see that gif to really take in the fuckboy bc i cannot find a representation as accurate as that gif is)

always greeting you whenever he sees you

“hey babygirl”

“hoseok we just saw each other in chemistry”

“ok and????? can’t i say hi to my baby?”

“but im not”

“lmao every girl is my baby”

raises his eyebrows any time you fix your dress or your shirt

asks to borrow a pencil and never returns it

“where is my pencil hoseok”

“where is my kiss (y/n)”

“we didnt agree to that”

“well i didnt agree to give it back”

“dO u NoT kNOW whAT BoRRoW meANS”

loves to share so he shares a lot of his snacks with u

“omg i love snacks!!”

“oh baby me too” and trust me, he’s not talking about the food

has the brightest, kindest smile so it catches you off guard when he says some snarky fuckboy comment

loves physical contact !!!!! always has a hand on your back, or shoulder, or thigh, or hand, or arm

lip LICKING PARDON ME HIS TONGUE IS UNCONTROLLABLE

lets you wear his hats/jackets/hoodies bc he thinks youre sooo cute in his clothes

he walks around school with his hands in his pockets like a doUCHEBAG

catches you off guard by spinning you around with his arm around your waist

uses the line “im a dancer” to get girls what an eyeroll

the type to drag you onto the middle of the dance floor at a club just so he could show off his skillz which are actually super bomb like even ur impress and uve seen them 308443 times

he got that sweatpants dick print

Namjoon

changes his contact name to Daddy on your phone

Mr. Ass Man he loves ass ASS ASS ASS SO MUCH ASS BIGGEST ASS LOVER

“oh shit did you see her ass”

“look here bootylover123 stfu”

winks at you a lot in the halls

“do you have a fucking eye problem namjoon”

“its a wink”

“u do it so much that im beginning to think youre eye is having a spasm

lets you copy his homework if he got a hug in return

the type to comment a peach emoji on your instagram photos even if there is no butt involved

loves when you sit on his lap

one time there weren’t enough seats on the bus and he patted his leg for you to sit

“i know you hate standing (y/n), take a seat itll be fine”

“why can’t u be a gentleman and give up your seat for me?”

*alMOST CHOkES from LAUGHING* “me???!!! a gentleman??? wow u expect too much, just sit your big ass down on daddy’s lap or suffer standing”

buys you lunch bc he loves showing off his e x p e n s i v e w a l l e t

he could go from having a full blown brilliant monologue as to why he exists to giggling about how your moles r arranged into the shape of a penis

calls girls mami or ma

asks for ass pics at like 1:32 AM

and u send him pictures of ur elbow crease

and he actually thinks its ur butt

BLASTS baby makin music from his car and causes a public disturbance

has the highest count of broken beds, not bc of a high body count, but bc he actually breaks the bed everytime he sleeps w someone

Jimin

spaces out when ur wearing a low cut top bc hes too busy staring at ur cleavage

his streak snaps are either mirror pics, his abs, mirror pic of his abs, and occasional dick pics

“wanna play 20 questions (;”

“we’ve played 20 questions like 20 times already”

“ok gr8 ill start first: will u let me hit it from the back??”

offers to netflix and chill all the time and it sux bc he actually knows all ur fav shows

ok let me reiterate, jimin knows all ur favorite anythings bc he listens to u 75% of the time bc he thinks ur voice is sexy

will never fail to compliment you when u look good

“damn baby, is this all for me????”

“no i just dont want to look like a hobo today”

gets super jealous when any other guys speak to u even tho hes piping down like 8 other girls

“jimin they’re my frIENDS ur not even my bf why u tripping”

“they arent acting like theyre ur friends. i know fuckboy behavior when i see it (y/n) its my occupation, i do the same shit w girls”

“thats good then, someone else wants me too”

“not good bc ur HOT ASS IS MINE )-:”

youre saved as #1 babygirl on his phone no objections

walks into class with a new hickey in a new place every day

he has SEX EYES u could never look him directly in the eyes bc theyre so captivating

fucking walks like an arrogant prick down the hall and whistles when u pass

brags about his big dick when its honestly not as exaggerated as he says

has a picture of you in one of his shirts as his homescreen wallpaper

Taehyung

“i wont show anyone, im not messed up like that” yea be careful w this one honey, pretty sure jungkook, hobi, yoongs, namjoon all know how ur tits look like

has the perfect innocent face where u have no idea that he’s fucking 4 other girls

always responds after 12 am and calls u at 3 am

“tae im fucking sleeping”

“damn thats hot what else u doin??”

“hanging up on u goodbye im going to block ur number”

“pls don-”

uses the line, “i just dont think we’re compatible” on E V Ery GIRL

offers to hangout but never follows up with it bc he’s never seen out in public with a girl unless its his momma

“jasmine is telling everyone you gave her chlamydia, u get checked bro??”

“dont worry about it”

body count means a lot to him

loves hugs bc he likes feeling boobs squished against him

sometimes INTENTIONALLY lowers his voice bc he KNOWS ur into that shit

thinks youre playing hard to get when rlly u just dont care lol

“i know u want all of this, (y/n)”

“i think ur mistaken”

“right bc i want all of u (:”

“ya tae let’s not get ur feelings mixed w mine ok thx u”

NO SUCH THING AS PERSONAL SPACE the boy is a koala and will latch onto u

Jungkook

the biggest fuckboy of them all

has slept w almost every girl in the school and is v proud of it

“what’s your name again”

“rlly jungCOCK”

“ok (y/n) i know ur fkcing name so can u learn mine”

u dont think he’s ever had a gf b4 bc he doesnt believe in labels OR commitment which hes pretty vocal abt

unlike jimin, he doesnt own up to his dick pics and swears that they were “”accidents””

SCrEENsHOTS! but ur smart so ur face is NEVER in ur pics

“who’s boobs r on ur phone kook”

“yours”

“you WOULDNT DARE”

“i dont have photogenic memory (y/n) i wanted to remember those cuties without a shirt on (;”

looks too fucking good w a fresh cut that u need to avoid him in the halls or ull melt to goo

only owns white tees and timbs lmao hahahaha

smirks when you bend down to pick something up

that or he yells, “one more time, babe!”

“wat u doin”

“showering”

“without me!!1???”

he’s on tinder too so once he’s done with the sampling pool at school, he can broaden his horizons

a car enthusiast and will get offended if u dont think his rims r cool

thinks youre really hot when you yell at him or hurt his feelings

youre his prized possession bc he actually likes talking to u but will never admit it

has a specific nickname for u that he doesnt call his other girls bc its YOURS !!

“hey cutie”

“hey jungCOCK”

hates the nickname jungCOCK

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