#family was only really able to help so much cause they have money issues of their own

[quasieli]

Help me stay afloat while looking for work!

Hi folks! It sucks to be asking this, but I really could use some help with paying some bills while I struggle to look for a job. I've been looking for work for months, but my options are quite limited in the new area I'm living in, but I have weekly medical bills to pay for therapy if I wanna stay sane through all of this. All I need is a bit of help with copayments, which aren't that high, but I hit the red, so I don't even have that.

I'm trying to get commissions set up to try and make a bit of extra cash on the side, but I've been really stressed out about this whole situation, making it really hard to focus on getting that done. If you could spare even a few bucks, I'd be so grateful. I'll even offer out some sketches and such if you want something while I'm still figuring out my proper commission stuff. Thank you so much to the folks who have already helped out, I'm forever grateful to y'all 💙💙

Venmo: EH1220

Ko-Fi: Link

Paypal: Link

[taisoleil]

Saturn and Ancestors through the Houses

First off, Saturn is an elder. It brings upon lessons, but did you know that those blockages are actually coming from some things your ancestors already experienced? This is the “been there, done that” planet that already knows the pain you’re going through? Why so? Because pain and trauma, which is Saturnian in nature, is carried this way. To understand this we must understand what is a natal chart in the first place.

I got this piece inspiration awhile back from someone on tumblr talking about how our chart are how our parent felt about our birth and what they were experiencing. This information helps us understand not only ourselves, but them. So, why can’t we understand our ancestors through this very system? Saturn is also ruled by time where with wisdom, should come time.

Timelines aren’t as straightforward as you may think. This is why Saturn does so well in the 12H is because of the ability to understand how much time (Saturn) can be an illusion (12H). This is also why your past, current, and future life are all happening at the same time, and why you are your ancestors, and how they live within you. When you reminisce about trauma from the past it’s as if you’re living it in your present moment because of that timelines overlapping.

Saturn really deals with the ancestral trauma and generational curses we all deal with. This may not be something you’ve felt from family, but something you may even be carrying with you due to your lineage. There’s a lot of people in your bloodline, so you never know what you’re carrying until you ask or check in with yourself. More than likely, your family members have been through the same thing.

This post is archived on my site here: https://www.taisoleil.com/articles/2021/6/11/d9mj0oemzek40itx9fonl3cdtblpnw

Full interpretations are exclusively on my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/87216320?utm_campaign=postshare_creator

Saturn 1H: One may have felt like they weren’t good enough when it comes to family. A generational issue you may be dealing with is linked with the insecurity of not being enough.

Saturn 2H: Feeling financially held back and traumatized is something you may experience when it comes to your family. You may have an issue with trauma bonding when it comes to money because of the fear of losing it all.

Saturn 3H: Feeling like your ideas were never enough probably caused you to second guess your own abilities. Being able to learn and refine your ideas based on how life shifts is how you evolve. The slightest bit of disappointment shouldn’t shake that.

Saturn 4H: Not being able to have you to yourself may have been a problem. Being forced to grow up early to deal with adult life before you were even ready was probably a thing as well. This is a situation where you had higher standards projected on you than other people.

Saturn 5H: FUN??? In your household??? Probably not! You probably were told to pursue something more serious and steady, possibly stripping you or your own creativity. It probably is hard for you to get out of black and white thinking because you were told if it doesn’t make sense, it cannot possibly be valuable.

Saturn 6H: Speaking of work, aren’t y’all tired of doing that? Having to prove yourself based on how much you do isn’t doing much for you at all. You may have come from a family that is used to breaking their backs to maintain something only to get caught in a rat race they can’t get themselves out of.

Saturn 7H: Learning how to keep the right bonds may be important for you. As with anything in life, some bonds aren’t worth the energy based on the time we spend with people. Giving that many people that sort of lenience is a disservice to yourself.

Saturn 8H: Spending habits are going to be key from you. You may have been a family that was scared that you would miss out on something if you didn’t spend. The contrary to this is that even though money may have not been lost, in your day and age, every penny counts, and you weren’t taught frugality during an economic time where money was more available.

Saturn 9H: Don’t be afraid of new experiences. You may came from a family that didn’t do much. Didn’t venture out or try new things. Because of this, you may stay in your bubble or level of comfort zone that allows you the safety. The Sun finds joy in the 9H, and it can be an ego killer to find out you’ve been wrong about certain things.

Saturn 10H: High expectations can cause you to fold under pressure if you’re not careful. You may have come from a family that was expected of you to do everything even if that means forsaking what seemed to be unimportant.

Saturn 11H: Friendship and aspirations may be hard for you. Your family may have had terrible community/support/friends. People bringing you down is only going to regress your further if you’re not careful.

Saturn 12H: Your Saturn is in joy here. You may understand how to go about things better than others. Your ancestors may have figured it all out, and gave you the keys. Moving through your life, don’t doubt what you know. Instead, think more about what you can do with what you’ve learned.

[vacantgodling]

tl;dr i need help paying rent and health insurance this month. with the money from my recent paycheck, all i need is $263 (usd) to cover these expenses.

i hate to ask for money all the time but idk what else to do.

this month (august) was supposed to be great for getting my finances in order. i would be getting paid 3x, and i had a system that worked.

unfortunately things didn’t work out that way. this month has been the worst month this entire year:

the main issue is i caught covid (after 4 years of never having it once, i succumbed to people’s uselessness and having to go in person to work) and that kept me out of work for a week. the mini vacation was “nice” because my symptoms weren’t too bad, but the looming fear that i wouldn’t have enough for rent has now reared its head.

the week before, i already took 2 days off because my partner was informed their abusive father had been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and that sent them spiraling. he hasn’t kicked the bucket yet (ig cockroaches don’t die easily), but from what they said that week they thought he would pass by that sunday.

this past wednesday, the stress of their not so great extended family reaching out + grappling with this ended up with my partner having to go to the hospital for (tw) excessive vomiting—unable to keep water down and extremely dizzy. we were discharged that night thankfully once things calmed down and they are technically fine, just still resting and trying to slowly get back to eating normally. the drs weren’t able to determine what caused any of that to occur, but our current theory is just stress and not eating enough so stomach rebellion. i had to miss 4 hours of work to take them to the hospital so, my next paycheck is also gonna be short but not too terrible overall. i’m not really worried about it.

i don’t want to bore you all to death with all the details of all my other debts and struggles that i’m dealing with rn. i just want to illustrate how this week just fucked me over really badly. i’m currently the only one working between us bc my partner is disabled (and got denied disability for them last week so cool cool. love this country love it here).

and if it helps you feel more inclined to donate to me i’m black, queer, and transmasculine. marginalization bingo etc etc.

if you can’t spare anything i understand, i know we’re all broke and struggling and there’s other causes that are definitely more pressing. this isn’t a matter of life and death. just would really help to not have to get screwed over by this.

i offer commissions so if you wanna check my ko-fi -> https://ko-fi.com/vacantgodling/commissions

(just know there’s a small of a list rn, i haven’t been drawing as much as i need to for the commissions i do currently have and i’m sorry for that i’ve just been stressed out. thanks to everyone who’s ordered for their patience i’ll be getting to stuff as soon as i can)

but if you’d like to just donate to my paypal -> https://www.paypal.me/pinkpurgatory

if you don’t have anything to spare (which again, totally fine) please spread this around if you can i’d appreciate it.

thanks for reading and i hope you have a good day 💛

[cobaltperun]

Lost (24) - Landing in London

Tara Carpenter x female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 3.7k

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

-And when the night falls in around me, I don't think I'll make it through, I'll use your light to guide the way, 'Cause all I think about is you-

She used to be lonely as a child. Woodsboro was a small place, children often met through parents, and her mother had her when she was young. Meaning while her parents were raising her their classmates and friends went out to party or went to college, meaning they had no kids Sam could hang out with when she was really young. So, Sam was lonely, Sam was alone, quickly learning that she couldn’t really go to anyone for company. Kids at kindergarten talked about watching cartoons with their parents, but Sam never had that. Her father, the only father she ever knew, even if she wasn’t his biological daughter, did his best, gave up on his dreams so he could take care of her. Her mother did the same thing, working, coming back home, taking care of Sam. They didn’t really struggle, they weren’t rich, but they had plenty, but Sam was lonely. All she ever wanted was to have someone to spend time with, to share moments and memories with.

And then the greatest gift Sam ever received in her life made the loneliness go away. Tara was born, a month earlier than she was supposed to be, and sickly, soon to be diagnosed with asthma, but she always, always looked at Sam with those expressive brown eyes and a happy smile that made Sam promise she would always protect her little sister. It broke Sam’s heart when Tara would spend another sleepless night, sick, sometimes just barely breathing, and still managed to smile at Sam.

Her strong, resilient little sister. Tara’s always been the strongest person Sam knew, enduring everything happening to her before she could even walk. Tara knew pain before she knew love, she knew sickness, and hospitals, and medicine before she knew playgrounds, parks, toys, playing, anything a child her age should know.

Sam loved Tara, more than anything in the world, but her love couldn’t replace the love of her parents. Unlike Sam, Tara never truly had that. Because Sam was loved as a child, her mother loved her, her father adored her, their family worked the way it was. Sam didn’t need much, so Sam was loved.

Her parents didn’t count on a sick child though, they didn’t count on all the medical bills, on all the time they’d need to spend taking care of Tara and taking her from one doctor to another. Looking back, perhaps finding out Sam wasn’t his daughter was only the excuse her father needed to leave them, because he could no longer handle having a sick child and now that the other one wasn’t his, well, it just gave him another excuse. Not to mention Christina was starting to drink some time before he left. He ran away, never to be heard from again, and Sam hated him for leaving Tara like that.

So, with him gone, money became a bit of an issue, and the only reason people didn’t really notice was Christina’s inherited house. Hell, Sam had no idea until several years later that Christina took money for Sam babysitting Chad, Mindy, and Wes. Sam didn’t say anything, because that money was used to pay for Tara’s medicine, and Sam would always protect Tara.

That was how she, now an angry teenager swung first before asking any questions when she saw an unfamiliar kid talking to Tara. That kid turned out to be you, trying to help Tara, but Sam didn’t know that at the time. She wouldn’t have even remembered your first meeting if Tara wasn’t angry at her for attacking you like that.

It was almost funny how the two of you were so drawn together, how Tara, without even knowing your name got angry at Sam. Tara was shy though, but she kept seeing you every now and then, and even though she never approached you, she’d tell Sam she saw the ‘cool girl’ in the hall between classes. So, Sam asked around as subtly as she could, finding out you were the only child of a rich family that recently moved to Woodsboro, but other than that she couldn’t find out anything about your family. She did learn you had an interest in martial arts, which explained the quick reaction when Sam attacked you.

Sam still remembered her anger when Tara, near the end of that year, and sicker than she was in a long time, told her how their mom didn’t pick her up from school and how she stood in the rain for an hour and a half. Yet, despite the temperature that was too high for home-made medicine, despite the cough and runny nose and all the other symptoms, Tara still looked happy, because she properly met you, and you carried her home in that rain. And when you dropped by the next day to check on Tara because she didn’t show up in school Sam saw the admiration in Tara’s eyes and somehow, without an explanation, she felt at peace.

And then you became a constant in Tara’s life, acting as her shield from the world. Sam remembered it as if it happened yesterday, the scene she walked into a few months before she left.

~X~

Tara hadn’t been this sick in a couple of years, probably since that time in the rain when you first carried her home. You kind of made sure of that, you skipped after-school activities when it was raining so you could make sure Tara got home as dry and warm as possible. You couldn’t protect Tara from everything, so when Christina’s neglect made Tara wait in front of the front doors for hours in cold weather, she got severely sick. She couldn’t even lie down without having a coughing fit, but Sam couldn’t panic. She couldn’t do much more than pick up medicine or make Tara some tea. She had to put faith in her mother to take care of Tara, even if every sign pointed toward the realization that Christina wouldn’t do that. Still, Sam had to hope because sooner rather than later Sam would leave and Tara would be left only with their mother.

She had to leave, she wasn’t safe for Tara, she was starting to hallucinate, waking up in the middle of the night and seeing her biological father. It took her several minutes to figure out what was real and what was her mind fucking with her, and she couldn’t let Tara see her like that. More importantly, she couldn’t risk hurting Tara in that state of confusion.

She still called her mother, just to ask how Tara was.

“W-what is it,” her mother answered and hiccupped, drunk, and Sam’s blood ran cold.

“Where are you? What about Tara?!” Sam demanded, for a moment wondering if she really could kill her mother, because she wanted nothing more than to do that, and that desire frightened her, strengthened her need to get away from Tara to protect her.

“At home, she’s fine~,” her mother drawled, and Sam wanted to crush her phone, to let her rage out, instead, she just ran home, barging in and running upstairs to Tara’s room. She didn’t hear coughing, she didn’t hear anything as she ran down the hallway, and she was frightened of what she would find when she opened the doors, but instead of Tara in pain or not breathing at all, she found Tara with you.

You were sitting in a not so comfortable position, leaning back against the rather uncomfortable headboard. You held a pillow to your chest, and Tara was right there, leaning on it and sleeping peacefully, half lying down, half sitting, but not coughing. She had the yellow teddy bear Sam bought her years ago next to her, and she was holding your hand, making you hug her from behind. From the corner of her eyes Sam noticed an almost eaten plate of soup, one that her mother definitely didn’t make. It was from a local restaurant, so you must have bought it for Tara.

Sam’s knees nearly buckled from relief, but the look in your eyes made her freeze, you were angry, but you couldn’t move, not without disturbing Tara’s peaceful slumber, and even as pissed as you were you wouldn’t do that. Sam saw you wanted nothing more than to get into a fight with Sam for leaving Tara alone when she was this sick, and Sam would have let you hit her as hard as you could, because she felt like she deserved it. Yet, you didn’t. Not because you cared about Sam, no, you talked every now and then and you were civil with one another, so no, it wasn’t because of Sam. It was because Tara would be sad if you and Sam fought, and you wouldn’t allow that.

“Y/N,” Tara mumbled weakly, and Sam noticed she held your hand a bit tighter now.

“I’m right here,” you soothed her, your thumb brushing against her hand as Tara settled down once more.

It was you. When Tara was sick and left alone by her mother, she didn’t call Sam, she called you, and you came, dropping who knows what just to take care of Tara. With how sick Tara was, she barely remembered calling you, she vaguely remembered you were there, but she most certainly didn’t remember sleeping while leaning back on you. Or if she did remember she definitely wasn’t sharing that with Sam.

~X~

The next time Sam saw you and Tara like that was after Tara was attacked, only there wasn’t a pillow between you two this time. Sam could never repay you for how much you cared for Tara while she was gone, because she was sure you’ve spent countless sleepless nights taking care of sick Tara, or simply keeping her company when she felt alone, abandoned by everyone else. Later, while you were training for your last two matches Tara told Sam about those times, about how she would always worry that you’d get sick taking care of her, yet you somehow remained resilient, not once getting sick. Tara also told her about all the times she had you watch The Babadook with her, or the times she just called you over so you could just hang out, do homework together or research random things.

Tara was always the happiest when you were with her, and Sam would forever cherish the memory of Tara laughing while the two of you danced at your wedding.

It was, naturally, a small wedding, the two of you, her and Danny, Chad with his girlfriend at the time, Mindy, Anika, Gale, Sidney with her family, and Kirby. And Tara looked more beautiful than ever, laughing, unable to keep the smile off her face for a moment, and her happiness was contagious.

Sam would have given everything she had to go back to those times, to the time when Ghostface was a thing of the past, and not a threat she once again had to deal with. To sit at the dinner table with Tara and you, making plans for whatever you wanted to do this week, instead of sitting at her computer, yet again realizing that the cult dedicated to Ghostface actually existed.

She should have known it was only a matter of time before he came back, and in the darkness of the night she looked at her window, seeing him there. Her real father, taunting her, putting the mask on her reflection, his mask, the same mask she put on when she killed Bailey.

“I like the design,” the monster told her, and she knew exactly what he was talking about, the dog painted on the mask, proving the belonging to the cult.

Sam got up abruptly, her chair scrapping against the floor. She needed to tell Tara and you, she needed to make sure you were ready and careful. She found you and Tara in the living room, on the sofa, with Tara sitting on your lap and flipping through a magazine while you hugged her from behind and rested your chin on her shoulder, occasionally kissing Tara on the cheek or the side of her neck.

“Sam? What’s wrong? You look worried,” Tara noticed, of course Tara noticed.

Sam should have told her right then and there, she should have told Tara everything. How she’s been lurking online, looking for any signs of Ghostface coming back, how she saw her father more and more often and the medicine was no longer working as well as it used to. Instead, seeing how happy you two were, she shook her head, staying quiet. “Just something at my job. What got you two so excited?” she tried to put on a smile.

Tara and you remained silent, as if exchanging a silent conversation by just briefly glancing at one another. “We’re having a baby!” Tara’s words shattered what little sense of relaxation Sam had left.

Tara would more than likely be the one getting pregnant. She’d be in even more danger than usual, and the child would be in the constant danger from Ghostface, no matter where Tara and you moved to. And in that cold September night that one thing that made Sam’s body tremble wasn’t the temperature, it was the fear for her sister and the life Tara was trying to build with you.

“Sam?” you spoke up when Sam didn’t respond.

“Oh! Sorry! That’s great! Congratulations!” she put on a fake smile, but her mind was already creating plans to infiltrate the cult. She’d just take the place of the one with the dog on the mask. She just needed to find him or her first.

~X~

It was the middle of the October, in the early morning, and Sam was watching a building from a busy coffee shop, with nothing but newspapers and a cup of coffee that had long since stopped steaming. She barely touched the coffee, frankly, she just needed some kind of cover. The unassuming blonde woman, no older than twenty-three left the building in a densely populated block. It was just at the edge of an area with high crime-rate, more importantly it was an area where one could easily rent an apartment without having to answer too many questions, so perfect to hide, or use as a base of operation for following someone. Sam narrowed her eyes and waited to make sure the woman wouldn’t come back right away before slipping into the building.

She had followed the woman enough times already to know which apartment was hers, so, when she got on the fourth floor she looked around and dropped to her knee to pick the lock, only to realize the apartment was unlocked.

Did the woman notice her and was setting up a trap? Or was she just that carefree? It didn’t matter, the girl was slightly smaller than her, looked slower and weaker than Sam as well. Worst case scenario Sam would get injured, but she’d come out on top, no matter what. It wasn’t this girl Sam was worried about, even if she left her alone she wouldn’t be able to beat you, it was the rest of the cult that worried her.

So, she stepped inside, on edge and ready to strike at any sign of movement, but the apartment was empty. No one was inside and she even checked to make sure there wasn’t a hidden room behind the mirror. So, she went and searched the place for clues about the cult. The notebooks gave her very little, and she’d have to deal with the girl’s laptop when she was alone. Still, hoping she’d find something in the laptop she stashed it away in her bag and hid in the girl’s bedroom. All she had to do now was wait for the woman to come back.

And sure enough, about an hour later she heard the doors opening. The blonde had no reason to suspect anyone was in her apartment, and she actually whistled happily when she stepped into the bedroom. As for Sam, she just sneaked up on the girl and grabbed her from behind, slitting her throat before the girl could even figure out what was happening.

She did it, she easily killed the woman that had the mask with the dog, but it also frightened her, because the woman was only a few miles away from where Tara and you lived. She moved there two weeks ago, and Sam was willing to bet she was going to attack Tara and you, or Sam herself, soon.

After that Sam got lucky, the cult meetings required the mask to be on at all times, and that they would use a voice changer, which meant no one really knew who the other Ghostfaces were. But she got into the cult, and though she wanted to start slaughtering them, she couldn’t get close to anyone without raising suspicions.

And then an opportunity that she couldn’t pass up on came up. The leader wanted to kill your father, and then get your mother to give him as much money as she could in return for her life. That would fund the next step of the leader’s plan.

Sam volunteered, killing your father in an apartment falsely rented in your name, in cold blood, stabbing him multiple times, taking her revenge for everything he and your mother did to you. Taking her revenge for them hiring Thomas and making Tara cry while you were in a coma, for making her cry for you, for nearly successfully arranging your murder… She may have stabbed him a few times too many in her fury.

“That’s enough, Ghost-Dog,” Ghostface pulled her away from the body and she shook him off, wiping the knife clean of blood and breathing heavily as she stepped away.

“Still, this will look convincing. Now, I’ll go deal with the Mrs. L/N, you need to get Y/N L/N to come here,” his words made her heart stop for a moment.

Why did he want you there? What did he plan to do? If he wanted to attack you that would be the perfect opportunity to end the biggest threat. The two of you could end the leader of the cult, you could take his mask and the two of you could then take care of the rest of the cult members.

“Ghost-Dog? Call Y/N and get out of here, let the police do the rest,” she could hear the confusion in his voice even through the voice changer-

They weren’t attacking you? They were framing you? They were making sure you were locked up? But Tara was pregnant! You couldn’t protect her from jail!

Still, if she didn’t follow the orders, she’d lose her chance and Tara would be in an even greater danger.

So, Sam nodded. “Yes, sir,” she spoke evenly, once again seeing her father tauntingly smirking at her. She was making things even worse. She was taking Tara’s greatest protection away from her. She was betraying you. She was betraying her sister. But maybe this would protect Tara in the long run. Maybe with you gone she’d go into hiding?

When the leader left, and Sam was sure she was left alone she turned off the voice changer and called you.

“Sam?” you sounded relieved to hear her. “Do you have any idea how worried Tara is, you asshole. Come back home!” you still scolded her, and despite blood dripping from her hand Sam still smiled a bit. If she could protect Tara, if she could only protect Tara…

“I don’t have time to talk, I need you to come and meet me somewhere, right now,” she didn’t need to fake urgency, she knew exactly what she was doing, she knew it would be unforgivable, that you would never trust her again, but she still set up the trap for you. And you walked into it, like a fool that trusted her.

~X~ March 24th, 2027 ~X~

Sam sat at a bar, drowning her sorrow in whiskey. Funny how things turned out. She despised her mother for drinking, she scolded Tara for drinking, yet here she was, drinking her problems away. She spent five months in the cult and had nothing to show for it but one dead Ghostface and blood on her hands. Danny was dead, Tara was captured, and she had no idea where she was. After getting you framed, she became somewhat of a second in command, seeing as she basically took care of the greatest threat, so she wasn’t assigned to whatever location they were holding Tara in.

She tried to keep Tara safe, and all it accomplished was the death of her boyfriend and her beloved, pregnant, sister, now being in more danger than ever before. Everything she touched she ruined, that was the summary of her life and she felt awful, she felt cursed, she felt like she had no right to ever hold her sister again.

“Your tip saved Sidney’s life,” she heard Kirby’s voice coming from the side and just barely lifted her head to look at the FBI agent. She didn’t care how Kirby managed to find her, Kirby somehow ended up finding her a couple of times over the past half a year, at this point Sam didn’t really question it. Maybe she was just that predictable.

“And Gale?” she asked, even though she felt the answer in her bones.

“Dead. It took too long for my mole, Ghost-Wolf, to take the snake mask and go after them,” Kirby sat down in front of her and slumped back against the chair. “Things aren’t so bleak though. Our newest ally found Y/N,” she managed to smile a bit, despite the circumstances.

Sam nodded. She failed to protect Tara, but you would be able to do it. You’d keep Tara and your child safe. “Good, I’ll finish this, three nights from now,” she decided right then and there, she’d put an end to the cult, or die trying.

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Taglist: @alexkolax

[crumblinggothicarchitecture]

Hi! I hope you're doing all right!

I used to be a huge swiftie until The Eras Tour get to my country on November during a heatwave. Of course, the weather and the issues about all the logistics from the very first night of her concert weren't Taylor's fault.

The thing that happened here was that a swiftie passed away during The Eras Tour in here 'cause of the weather and the stadium didn't allow people to bring water bottles inside, they could only buy water from the stadium. It was sold out, a lot of swifties needed medical attention that night, they couldn't reach to the place where they were selling water bottles, anyway.

Taylor made a post in her Instagram about the swiftie which passed away and she said something similar to: "I won't be able to speak about it on stage 'cause it brings me a lot of pain". And... that was it? She never spoke one single word about that girl, it was just that one story (that, of course, would disappear later) and she moved on.

The Eras Tour kept going here for a few more days in here and then Taylor left to the USA again to take a break. During this time, we, swifties, figured out Ana's family (the girl that passed away) had a lot of trouble to get her body back home for the funeral, Ana wasn't from the state where the first night of the tour happened and her family couldn't afford to transport her body. Guess who had to help her family with money? Yes, we, swifties. Her family reached out us online and asked for help.

That made me really angry at Taylor 'cause during the week Ana's relatives had to ask for help to get her back home, we read news about Taylor becoming a billionarie. I can't tell you what got broken inside of me as a swiftie that day, but I simply couldn't see Taylor as *that* Taylor anymore.

At the last night of The Eras Tour, Taylor invited Ana's family to attend the stadium, took a picture with them and still, not a single word about a swiftie, a fan of hers even on the last night.

Later, we got some swifties saying Taylor tried to speak with Ana's family but she couldn't reach them (which, to this very day, I doubtly). A lot of swifties from my country still say this, that Taylor tried and that was enough. I have this feeling that if Taylor had, in fact, spoken to the family they wouldn't ask the fans for help. Ana only got a proper funeral after her family saying the donations raised enough money to pay for everything, they never asked for anything again, or anything more than what they really needed.

Swifties from my country got mad at the media for speaking out about how Taylor handled out the situation, now they say our media is responsible for Taylor never coming back here 'cause every other country in the world treated her as a princess and we didn't see her that way after what happened to Ana.

Her PR manager made some media from the USA (I can't recall which one now) write a love story about Taylor and Travis while we were trying to call their attention to what was happening in here and how they were dealing with it.

I can't forgive Taylor. After that day, I learned she's a character and the real one is cruel, mean and has a never ending thirsty for money, attention and fame.

Thank you so much for reading this! And thank you so much for this free and safe space!

Have a nice day!

❤️

Hello, my dear, thank you for writing in. I hope that you are well and thriving.

I cannot express enough my deepest sympathies for the loved ones and family of Ana Clara Benevides.

Taylor Swift is a coward who simply did not want the bad press to besmirch her precious "Eras Tour" that is why she did not say her name in that stupid instagram press-release.

She is now cavorting around the UK making a big show about stopping the tour to ask people if they are okay. (This happened in Scotland). The media outlets have been expressing how deeply caring Taylor Swift is about her fans.

I cannot help but to think that it is all a ruse meant to help people forget about the death in Brazil. I cannot help but to think that she is intentionally feeding the media positive stories about her checking in during the concert to rebuild her oh-so-precious reputation.

Well, not all of us are so foolish and shortsighted as to forget what happened in Rio.

She did not spare a moment of her time for the life loss in Brazil. She did care a bit about the thousands that were hospitalized due to heat-related symptoms.

I cannot in good faith support a woman who made headlines about her newly acquired billionaire status the same week Ana Clara Benevides died at her concert.

Thank you for sharing your perspective. Taylor Swift could not even spare a moment of silence for her...

Yes- the weather was not Swift's fault, but she has more money than God- she could have easily reached out and paid for transport of Ana Clara Benevides back to her home or paid for the proceedings of her funeral. She did not- she did not even say her name in that stupid press-release- claiming that "it was too painful." Bullshit- she just did not want to draw more attention to the event.

I call bullshit on her attempting to contact the family too. There is no way she just wasn't able to find them.

Frankly, the heat index was reaching 138 degrees Fahrenheit on the day of the concert. Those are undeniably unsafe conditions. If Taylor Swift was a responsible and caring person, she would have postponed the concert until a later date. It's not safe to be inside a stadium- with thousands of other excited people jumping up and down- during such an intense heat wave. The stadium basically turns into a frying pan at that point. If Taylor Swift cared, she would have heeded the weather. But she didn't, because that would mean losing out on some money.

I am disgusted with the immorality on display, with the self-centerness emanating from Taylor Swift. Shameful.

[youngyoo-apologist]

OG Choi Han they could never make me hate you cause if some random rich boy was yelling at me and telling me my family deserved to die like a day after it happened and all I wanted was to know how I could get help I’d beat him up too

This plus the added fact that the Harris Village people were the first people to take Choi Han in and take care of him after years and years in the dark forest. Like he’s obviously not going to be mentally stable after all that, and he was so young when everything happened to him like I cannot blame him at all. I don’t think I can ever hate OG Choi Han like ever, he’s flawed, he has problems, but I love him dearly. He deserves the world. This kid who had to fight for his life, was taken away from his family, and in the process had to give up parts of his own humanity to survive, and like went to war two years later, they could never make me hate u OG Choi Han…

Like yeah violence is bad I guess but OG Cale had it coming(saying this as an OG Cale fan, I love him, but he was mean as hell when he was younger!)

If I’m honest, I think they were both in the wrong to an extent. Like OG Cale shouldn’t have said all that no matter the circumstances, and OG Choi Han shouldn’t have beaten him up so much. But u say mean shit and you get hit, that is how it will work when you’re talking to the guy who just saw his entire village get murdered like idkkkk man

I understand where OG Cale was coming from, but he had many issues and while he wasn’t an awful person, he was capable of doing bad things because of his own internalized pain and emotions that he never got to properly process because of his emotionally distant childhood and relationship with his father who should have been there for him more when he was younger.

Okay speaking of his childhood, Deruth isn’t the WORST father in the world but there are a lot of things he could have done better. I think a lot of Deruth’s flaws come from his fear of failure and messing up. He’s scared of doing the wrong thing, and so he sticks to doing what he knows and using what he knows best. That’s why he uses his money, that’s why gift giving is his way of showing affection, he knows that it is one thing he cannot mess up.

The problem is that money and gifts is NOT what OG Cale needed. I think what that guy needed the most was a parent who wasn’t afraid to talk to him, to ask him questions. Not to say that Deruth gave up on OG Cale, but I think in a way he gave up on OG Cale by giving up on himself. Deruth didn’t trust himself to have the capabilities to talk to OG Cale, which is why he never did. It’s because that Deruth was scared, and didn’t trust himself, that he could never face OG Cale

If Deruth was able to trust himself a little more, and pull himself together, I don’t think OG Cale would have turned out the way he did. As a kid, he probably thought the only way he could help his family without relying on anyone(no doubt this whole ‘I have to do it myself’ thing came from the fact that he couldn’t rely on his father when his mom died, and instead was acting as a pillar of support for his father when it should have been the other way around) was to sabotage himself, the only heir. If he was shown to be unfit to be heir, then everyone else would have no choice but to direct their hatred towards him instead of his family.

If Deruth had talked to his son at least ONCE when he was a kid, asking him why he was upset or why he did the things he did, I think OG Cale would have told him. Why? Because he’s a kid!! A kid will obviously want to rely on his father, if he just had one sign telling him that he didn’t have to do it alone I’m 90% sure OG Cale would have said something.

Basically, while Deruth isn’t the worst father, he’s not really a great father either. I think he does do his best, but he has issues with communication lol

OG Cale and OG Choi Han are both complex characters and had their own reasons to behave the way they did. The thing is with people is that they’re complicated and have layers, so the situation with them would have layers behind it as well with multiple co-existing truths and stuff

[diacripticcomplex]

DL Characters as College Majors/Life after highschool/Adulting experiences: 

Shu: Did not attend college, and will not. Somehow he was able to find a super boss lady girlfriend who literally takes care of him and doesnt want him working or going anywhere. Shu thinks that he's the one running things in the relationship and she will make him think that but she's pulling all the strings in the background. The only thing she wants Shu to do is take care of their dog and cat, which Shu gladly does, he is much better at taking care of animals than he ever was at taking care of other people. Smokes a lot of weed when his girlfriend isn't home, she keeps him at peace and without her he starts panicking. 

Reiji: He graduated highschool a year earlier than most, and is in his third year of pre-medical school, he successfully got his associates degree in Biology. He's also engaged to someone he doesnt even know but he has no choice but to obey his father's wishes. Doesnt go to any college parties and is not friends with anyone, however he does ass kiss the professors so that he would be able to score a good internship and letters of rec for Medical school. A few ladies in his classes think he is very attractive but he is uninterested in them and is loyal to his betrothed, having no idea what she even looks like is crazy but good for him I guess. 

Ayato: The life of the party, Literally he only went to college for the parties, his GPA was really low but he got money so he's able to pay of course. Joined a whole frat, is a huge frat bro and his major is finance. Which is crazy cause he sucks at math and anything pertaining to numbers.  He always makes class groupchats in order to get the answers for assignments and exams, thats how he's managing to get by all his classes. He's gotten roofied at a party before and is super careful with his drinks now as well as keeping a lookout for other people. He always tries to get his brothers to attend his frat parties, Laito does and once Subaru went, instantly regretted it cause Ayato made him jug like 20 beer cans back to back. He also has a huge crush on Yui but never invites her to the parties because he's scared something bad can happen to her there since there were many cases. 

Kanato: A well known art and design major, as well as minoring in historical fashions. Kanato has a huge passion for designing clothes and he was so happy he got accepted into a university that allowed him to use his creativity. He takes a lot of art related classes, his favorite is sculpting because it allows him to create sculptures out of wax, and he even got an award and his own exhibit on campus, yes he's that good. He's a part of a very quiet friend group of artists who silently create their mark on the school, the whole group is 5 girls and Kanato, crazy thing is Kanato managed to have sex with each one of them and theyre all aware as well but the convinced them in was to further their artistic view on bodies. He has a side hustle where he sells handmade bags and clothing, he's been doing very good to the point he can own his own boutique. 

Laito: He loves a good party and tries his best to attend all of Ayato's frat parties, but he does not go to college, instead he takes online courses on how to be a "health" guru, (sex guru). He's been doing good though, he's also a part-time massager for women only, he literally harassing them but they do not mind. He's also in a throuple relationship and a step father currently, but he has 3 kids from his previous relationships, yes Laito has 3 baby mamas and he's also  very active on social media trying to be a trendy influencer. He's also been in therapy for his mental health issues and past traumas, its been helping him. he tries to convince his brothers to come with him but they refuse, he never gives up. He really wants that family group therapy. 

Subaru: College did not spark his interest at all, despite the fact that he pretty much would be able to get a scholarship or be a pro-athlete. Subaru started to do boxing as a career choice, going into professional fights and winning every fight he has ever been in. His fighting name is the White Tiger. He loves to workout, and keeps a very healthy lifestyle so that one time he did go to that annoying frat party it completely messed up his flow it took him a few weeks to recover. Before he was fighting he tried using steroids to get ripped but stopped after he started feeling like shit. He has a girlfriend, and they have been together for YEARS! She's pregnant too and they have a cat together as well, they live in a nice condo and iconically he drives a subaru. 

Ruki: He's in culinary school. Honestly, he can cook very well. even Gordon Ramsey was impressed. He goes abroad quite often for competitions and for learning more about cultural dishes. He's managing an online business where he sells these goodie snacks and its international as well, Kou being famous helps promote his snack brand even more. Ruki also got married around his 3rd year in culinary school to the head chef, she literally fell in love with his cooking, however they keep their relationship a secret for obvious reasons, she's his teacher technically. He always brings his brothers back souvenirs from everywhere he goes, his favorite places so far were New York and Las Vegas, the food impressed him very much. 

Kou: He's been famous, and now he's evenm more famous thanks to Tiktok and instagram. He has a whole PR team as well and is often also traveling between Japan, California, New York, and Paris. He has a lot of modelling and brand deals as well, he's currently working on a cologne line and perfume line for women as well as male skin care. Kou has a lot of groupies and he almost married one but she was crazy and still stalks him. He has a lot of scandals as well. His nudes were leaked and a tape as well going viral on twitter and discord. He has collabed with a lot of famous singers and tiktokers. He is thinking of getting into acting if the scandals die down. 

 

Yuma: Works in the agriculture industry, but he’s not a farmer or gardener, he inspects gardens for a living and if they’re bad he will tell them how to improve it, he also works closely with importation of certain fruits and veggies. Nothing gets past Yuma, he has a big house with an even bigger garden and green house as well, he’s also gay and still big in love with Shu but respects his relationship they hang out sometimes. He’s currently working on a product to remove pesticides without harming the human body or altering the fruit/veggie. He’s been to a few gay clubs, and had some fun but likes to keep his life private and isn’t interested in a relationship right now.

Azusa: He met a very good person who was working as a therapist and she ended up becoming his girlfriend, he was never her patient but she was def helping him without even him realizing it, he's focusing on his mental health mainly and he's gotten a bunch of tattoos to cover up all his scars. He also works from home and is currently writing a book about his life, specifically the peak of his low, which was when he met his brothers in the orphanage. He has a pet kitten and he actually has 3 kids with his soon to be wife, he's also been getting into drawing and wants to illustrate children's books, and do a side hustle of tattooing. 

Carla: Works in the police force, he spends most of his time with the international forces and monitors media, he’s also working for disease control he used to be a detective however he shot someone innocent and couldn’t work the ranks anymore so he just works in internal affairs, he had a whole political campaign at one point but some women came forward with allegations against him some were true, some just hate him so they lied, safe to say he’s not getting into power any time soon, his daughter is his rock but he’s on the verge of a divorce. (I don’t like Carla)

Shin: He went to college to become a zoologist, but decided to get into the fur pelts industry instead, he works closely with fashion designers and certain colder countries , he’s been getting great trade, he also almost had a near death experience with a wolf so he no longer wants to be around animals. He practices not showering for months. (Yea I don’t like Shin)

Kino: (I def don’t like Kino) He works at a game stop.

Yui: this precious Angel Yui, goes to college for religious studies, she makes cute rosaries for all her fellow church group members/friends and they pray together, she wants to become an abbess very badly and is trying her very best in all of her classes, she does a lot of charity and fun raisers too, putting her cooking and baking skills to use, she had a crush on Ayato they shared the same pre req class but once he started partying and stuff she grew super distant from him, but still says hi to him when they see each other on campus.

[yooniesim]

hi, I'm on anon because honestly I can't deal with this anymore.

I'm on CF because the extra $50-$100 I get really means I can survive another month. I don't have much left over but it helps.

I recently started getting death threats sent to me, I don't even post much. But people still found there way, I'm assuming I'm on a list somewhere and probably an easy target.

I just want to drop off this earth now, let the haters get what they want..... I know people are hurting but I cannot help them if I cannot survive myself.

...I'm so, so sorry to hear this, nonny. No one deserves death threats and I'm really sorry you're going through this. I know that particular pain of having to choose between money that is life-saving and what you feel is right in your heart. I don't have the perfect solution to this issue... I decided to stop using it, though it has been a really big blow to me honestly, but I know you may not be able to do that right now.

If you haven't already, I would try getting patreon and ko-fi if you can. I'll admit, it's probably going to be way lower than CF (if you're not doing early access especially) and unreliable month-to-month, but it may help some. I don't like turning people towards the direction of paywalls, but if you need it, I would give early access a try. There's also sites like TSR and I believe Nexus has a creator program as well, so look into those. If you absolutely can't move off CF right now, I would definitely recommend figuring out what you can do elsewhere in your community. Find other ways to advocate for and support Palestinian people, and engage in boycotts in other aspects of your life (focus on the BDS list first).

You're right that you can only help if you're here to do so. Do what you can, when you can. Also, turn off your asks for a while and go offline if you need to. Focus your energy on the cause IRL if you're able. Especially local politicians and the friends and family in your life. Niche online spaces like simblr are a very, very small aspect to all this as a whole. Even if all the doomposting makes it feel like this is where the good fight is, it's only a blip on the radar. You can do a lot of good elsewhere, too. I believe in you, nonny!

[likedovesinthewindd]

a Sunny day

steve harrington x mom!reader (part 2)

summary: steve meets a little girl while working.

warnings: mentions of scars, nightmares, migraines, addiction to pain medication (but no one is), reader has financial issues. reader is a single mom. If i missed anything pls let me know.

wc: ±2590

a/n: I love steve sm omgg so here you go! requests open:)

For as long as Steve could remember, Saturdays were always the busiest days at Family Video. These last few months had been different.

Steve didn't like working on Saturdays, in all honesty, he didn't like working there at all, but since the "earthquake" had destroyed half of Hawkins and left a big chuck of it's population homeless or jobless, he couldn't be picky about where he got his money from. It had been 2 years since everything with Vecna, and everyone had seemed to have moved on with their lives, as difficult as it may have been.

Steve sometimes felt as if he hadn't really moved on at all. The physical scars surrounding his abdomen and neck, as faded as they had become over time, were still a permanent reminder of what had happened in the Upside Down. He had nightmares, awful nightmares that often caused him to wake up several times a night, shivering and in a cold sweat.

The worst thing for him had to be the migraines that plagued him frequently. It was difficult to find a doctor willing to actually help him out; how could you possibly tell your GP that you might have suffered head trauma from being captured and tortured by Russian spies, or from being beat up more times than you could count.

They would always scratch it up to "stress" or "bad sleeping habits", subscribe him a shit ton of pain medication and send him on his way. He didn't really want all the meds, way too scared that he'd become dependent on them, but when the debilitating throbbing in his head would become too much, he'd have to take two or three pills just to be able to function properly for a few hours.

A loud thud on the counter broke him out of his daydream, where he had been absent-mindedly staring at the computer's keyboard. He looked up to find Robin staring at him from behind the giant box she had placed in front of him. "These need to go in the horror section," her gruff voice spoke.

"Can't you do it?" Steve asked, pretending to be busy checking late returns on the computer. "No," she snapped, shoving the box closer to him, "because last week I had to repack the entire left side of the store on my own because you were too busy sucking face with Paige," she said the name in a condescending tone, fluttering her eyelashes teasingly.

The mention of the girl's name caused Steve to cringe.

"What's with the face, I thought you said she seemed like a nice girl?" Robin asked, thinking back to how Steve had been practically gushing about his date for a whole week. "She was, until she opened her mouth," he said, rubbing at his temples. Flashbacks from the previous week's date with Paige seemingly worsening his headache.

To put it nicely, Paige was mean and extremely self centered. If her screaming at one of the waiters because they got her order wrong wasn't enough of a deal breaker, her only talking about herself the entire time certainly was. She didn't ask Steve anything about himself once, opting to rant about how her dad didn't give her enough money to buy the Gucci crossbody bag she wanted, or how the lady at the hairdresser had dared to dye her hair the wrong shade of warm blonde.

The cherry on top was at the end of the night, when Steve had complimented her and told her that she had looked beautiful. She had thanked him, and replied with,

"Well, you're no King Steve anymore, but you looked cute."

She gave him a small peck on the cheek afterwards, and walked off towards her house, over exaggerating the sway of her hips as she went. She turned around one last time, giving Steve a "Call me," in her most sultry voice, and shut the door behind her.

Steve had not called her back since.

"What a shame," Robin said feigning sympathy. "Nothing like some good old labor to distract you from your heartbreak, right?" she added slapping the side of the box. "A little sympathy wouldn't hurt, you know," he said begrudgingly taking the box and moving out from behind the counter. "Yeah, yeah, get to work dingus," she said taking his place and helping a customer who had approached the counter.

When Steve arrived in the horror aisle, he threw the box on the ground unceremoniously and began stacking the tapes alphabetically. By the time he got to Nightmare on Elm Street, he felt a small tug on his pants. Looking down, he found a little girl, probably no older than three, looking up and him with big doll-like eyes and unruly hair.

"Hi," she said softly. "Hello there," Steve said crouching down so that he was at eye level with her, "what are you looking for?" She moved closer until her nose was practically touching Steve's and whispered, "The Last Unicorn," before breaking into a fit of giggles. Steve couldn't help but smile along to the sound of her small voice, standing back to his full length. "I'm sure we have that," he said, "but where's your mom, hm? What's your name?"

Before she could answer, the bell at the door indicated that a new customer had entered the store. A young woman stood at the door, looking around frantically. "Sunny? Sunny are you in here?"

You searched through the various shelves, stopping at the horror aisle when you saw you daughter Sunny standing with one of the store employees. "There you are. You can't ever run away like that again," you said, relief washing over your features. "Sorry mommy," she spoke softly, raising her arms so that you could lift her up. "It's okay Sunshine," you said picking her up and resting her on your hip. You turned around to Steve, you was still standing in the aisle silently watching you and your daughter's interaction.

"Hi, I'm sorry, she usually doesn't run away like this but she was so exited when I said we could rent her favorite movie today. It's not on TV yet but she watched it at school once now it's all she talks about!" you gushed turning towards Sunny, who had her eyes fixed trained on the cover of a Creepshow VHS behind your head. You turned around, quickly covering Sunny's eyes with your unoccupied hand. "Oh no baby don't look at that, you'll get nightmares," you said looking away from the shelf with a big frown. It seemed like it scared you more than it did her.

"Do you have The Last Unicorn available here?" you asked turning back to Steve. "I think so, right this way," he said leading you towards the childrens area. From behind him he could hear Sunny's small voice whispering to you, "his hair is so big mommy!" followed by her giggles. "Not as big as yours, Sunshine," you said pushing the flyaways from her face, laughing at her offended gasp.

When he reached the shelf, he swiftly scanned through the titles until he found the desired tape. "Here you go, would you like to rent it?" he asked.

"Please," you said handing Sunny the tape and following him to the counter. He subtly gestured to Robin to move away so that he could take her place. She rolled her eyes before mouthing "you owe me" and reluctantly moving to the abandoned box of tapes. When Steve got behind the counter he got the chance to really look at the two of you.

Sunny was basically an exact copy of you. Same eyes, same nose and hair (although yours was styled a bit more neatly than hers). You even had the same bright smile.

The name Sunny fit her perfectly too; with her small yellow dress fit with puffed sleeves with little bears printed on the fabric and the sunflower shaped hairclips that tried (and failed) to keep the astray curls out of her face, finished off with a bright pink pair of jelly shoes and frilly socks. She seemed like a sweet kid.

"What's it like, with her?" The question had left his mouth before he had the chance to think about how insensitive or mean it could have sounded. He was getting ready to apologize profusely, but when he looked up from the computer he was met with your smiling face.

"Well, it's not easy. I mean, can you imagine being a single mother living alone when that earthquake hit town? I wasn't planning on ending up homeless with a one year old, but everything's been so much beter since than. Plus, I still have my Sunshine, she's the only family I've got," you said smiling to your daughter.

It was then that Steve had realized just how much the earthquake had really affected the town. Sure he saw first hand when he was volunteering at the temporary shelters and soup kitchens, but hearing your personal account of what had happened made him realize just how bad everything was.

"You alright?" you asked snapping him back to reality. "Yeah, sorry that's just- I'm sorry that happened to you," he said sincerely. You shrugged, looking at your wrist watch for the time. "I'm sorry, the computer's been jamming lately, might take a while to process all the information," he said sensing your slight impatience. "No problem," you said, putting Sunny back down on the ground, opting to hold her small hand. The amount of back pain that comes with having a child is insane.

An awkward silence filled the air between you two, before Steve decided to speak up again.

"You said that you were homeless because of the earthquake, where do you live now?" he asked warily, worried he might have actually crossed the line this time. You looked hesitant before you answered. "At the Motel right outside of town. It doesn't sound very luxurious but it's nice," you replied.

Steve thought about his house, his parents' house technically, but they were never really around. He thought about the big, barely decorated bedrooms and the living area that looked like it came straight out of a issue of Architectural Digest. He considered asking you to come and stay with him; maybe you'd be able to give the house a more lived-in energy, make him feel less lonely there.

That would be weird, Steve thought to himself. Imagine a guy you had just met asking you to move in him, definitely not your best flirting method.

Flirting? No, he'd just recovered from his last love escapade. He couldn't even consider flirting with you, even though you had the prettiest smile he'd ever seen or that you looked at him like he hung up the stars whenever he spoke or that you were so kind or-

The droning sound from the computer rang through the empty store loudly. After finishing everything up, Steve handed you the tape. "Thank you so much," you said handing the tape back to Sunny. "How do you say?" you asked her. "Thank you," she whispered looking up at Steve with big eyes. You picked her back up and as you were on your way out, Steve got a sinking feeling in his stomach. He didn't want you to go, he wanted to keep talking to you, get to know you better.

"Wait!" he shouted a bit too loud, causing both you and Robin to turn around towards him. "Can we talk real quick?" he said approaching you, where you stood frozen with your hand still on the door handle. You furrowed your brows, thinking about what he could possibly still want from you.

"Would you like to go get a coffee sometime, maybe?" Steve asked trying his best to seem cool, even though his heart was beating rapidly in his chest. Your frown deepened, making Steve want to sink into the surface of the Earth and dissappear forever.

"Listen uh-" "Steve," he finished for you. "Steve, you seem like a really great guy, truly, but I'm not looking for anything serious right now, I'm sorry." Before you could open the door, Steve pulled you back by your arm lightly causing you to huff in irritation. "Look Steve-"

"It doesn't have to be anything serious, I just- I wanna get to know you better, I really like you," he rambled out. You seemed conflicted. You really were; you didn't want to start messing around with anyone now. Sunny was at a very impressionable age, and you really didn't want her getting attached to anyone, just for them to leave.

"I don't know If I could find anyone to look after Sunny when-" "Bring her along then," he interrupted you for the hundredth time today, "we could go to the park, get ice cream or something."

"Ice-cream mommy!" Sunny piped in excitedly. It broke your heart to see her so happy about going out, you hadn't been able to get her a lot of nice stuff or spoil her due to financial issues, hence why she had been so excited when you told her she could rent one of her favorite movies for you two to watch together. You hadn't been able to spend a lot of quality time with her either, taking long shifts to be able to make some extra money.

You bit the inside of your cheeck, looking back at Steve, who had been patiently waiting for your answer. You realized just how pretty he really is; with his big brown eyes like a baby deer, that looked like they could stare into your soul, and the various small moles and beauty marks that were littered across his face and arms, or the umber colored hair that he had to frequently push out of his eyes.

"I promise, I don't plan on making this a once off thing, I really do like you," he said softly.

You barley knew this guy, and he was asking you and your daughter out on a date. The one part of your brain was screaming at you to say no, let him down gently and leave, but the other part was curious about him. Maybe one date couldn't hurt.

"Okay, fine, one date," you said, giving him the angry mom voice, the one you'd always use when trying to reprimand Sunny. His eyes lit up at your words, a huge smile stretching across his face. He had to stop himself from jumping up and down from giddiness.

"Okay, great uhm uh, do you have like a phone number I could call or something," he asked sprinting to the counter to retrieve a pen. "We don't have landlines in our rooms, and the phone booth outside the Motel is busted," you said before your face lit up, "But we do have one outside of where I work. You could give me your number then I'll call you."

"Okay cool that works," he said messily scribbling his number on a old sticky note. You grabbed the note from him, sticking it inside your bra. "Alright, I'll see you around Steve," you said walking back to the door. "Wait, you never told me your name?" Steve said. "I'll tell you my name if our date went well," you said smiling, before walking out the door, your daughter on your hip, who waved a small hand at Steve from behind her mom's head. Steve waved back, smiling wider than he had in a long time.

Maybe he did like working Saturdays after all.

[sno4wy]

Did you seriously drop that much money to try to make your awful ship more valid? Guess what? You didn't, hope you enjoyed wasting a ton of money. It doesn't matter how much money you pay, you and your lame friends will always be the only ones who prefer your fugly builder with Miguel. Just give it up and go jump off a bridge already.

Hey Anon, based on the three messages you sent me today, it seems that my sharing of my commission from Momodeary in the official Pathea Discord server really upset you. Your rage felt really familiar to me, and I thought about this a lot about why. I'm going to hazard a guess that you're lashing out at me more than usual because of the price aspect, especially for something that seems so frivolous. I get it -- I grew up in abject poverty, and I harbored a lot of rage about it both directly and indirectly for many years. It really sucks not having the money to do what you need, or even what you want, and it can feel like having salt rubbed into the wound when someone else shows off some pricey non-necessity that they got. Everyone deserves to get what brings them joy, as long as it isn't something that causes harm to others, and it sucks that capitalism/corporations/societal structure/etc make most people unable to attain that. I sincerely hope that things improve for you.

I'm fortunate now to do well enough for myself that I can afford a pricey commission like the one that I shared. I got the commission because I like Momodeary's art style, it's not a style that I see myself personally doing, and I'm making it up to myself now for all the things that I couldn't do in the past. I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to say it was to support the artist, as she has tons of clients and certainly didn't need my money, I'm really lucky to have been able to get a slot with her. If you have the means to do so and want to, I really suggest contacting her directly -- the worst thing she can say is no, but more likely is that she'll put you on an (admittedly long) waitlist. The point is, if you're upset about not being able to get a commission from her, don't write it off until you try. Worse comes to worst, she can't fit you in, but there are tons of skilled artists out there with similar styles that you can commission instead. It's ok though if you have your heart set on Momodeary, most artists are very accommodating as long as the client is understanding and willing to wait.

If your anger has to do with not being able to afford a commission from Momodeary, I'm really sorry about that. There are some ways that I can help, if not directly to get you a commission, but perhaps means to address the funds shortage issue. I managed to claw my way out of poverty, and in the process picked up more than a few ideas and tricks, however at the end of the day, there is no magical get rich quick scheme, and everything that you hear about how to find a job is sadly mostly true. For instance, a good resumé is an integral part to finding a job, and a big part of what makes a resumé good is proper formatting. Having gone from someone who sent out hundreds of resumés to someone who's had to review hundreds of resumés, I can tell you that so much of the time, it's a lot less about the contents of the resumé and more about its appearance. Countless qualified, heck, overqualified, people get turned down for positions because their resumés don't even get looked at. I'm happy to look over a resumé if you'd like, and of course I'd understand if you need to anonymize most of it before showing me. Please note that it is sadly the case that having a good resumé, or in many cases, all the correct qualifications, don't necessarily guarantee you a job. Connections are at least, if not more, important, so don't be shy about asking for help from friends and family in this aspect.

Finding and securing a job can be a long-term project though, so picking up some side hustles might be a good way to generate some income, especially as you can keep these side hustles after finding a job. A lot of people have even done so well with their side hustles that they were able to make them into their careers. I'm happy to make suggestions, but I'm afraid that my knowledge is chiefly confined to the US and my ideas may not be applicable or workable in other countries. I have found however that a fairly universal way to generate some income via a side hustle is through selling crocheted items. Crochet is very quick and easy to learn and master, and yarn is very cheap, especially if you get store brands like Joann's Big Twist. Red Heart Super Saver is also very cheap yarn that comes in a ton of colors. There are countless free patterns on the internet, and ones that aren't free tend to be pretty cheap, generally within the $5 range. It is totally legal to sell the stuff you make from purchased patterns; some patterns even explicitly state that this is the case. The best part about crochet is that you can do it while doing other stuff, like commuting to your job, watching a show, listening to music, etc. It's totally possible to churn out a ton of crochet animals (amigurumi) in one day. Dipping into fandom stuff by making characters from a certain franchise is a great way to sell crochet products. Another really cool thing is that there doesn't currently exist a way for crocheted items to be mass produced; while there are items that look crocheted, they're actually sewn together pieces and not true crochet. Machines can't currently make crocheted items. Buyers looking for real crochet products want something that only a human can make.

Online marketing tools are also pretty solid. Etsy is the way to go for handmade crafts, although they do take a pretty hefty fee (15%). You can try to cut down on that fee by listing on your own social media, in which case you'd still have to pay a 3-5% handling fee for payment processors, and it can be a pain trying to beat social media algorithms. If you're handy with TikTok, that's a great way to boost awareness of your brand, and you can use those same videos as Reels on Instagram and Facebook to get your accounts noticed faster.

If you're an artist, you could of course always try to go the commissions route, but I've found that this is a much harder uphill battle than trying to break into the scene marketing crochet goods. If you do decide to give crochet a shot, I really recommend investing in a quality hook -- Clover Armour is many crocheters' go-to. They are pricy, around $9 for a hook, but they last forever and they're super comfortable to use. You only need one to start -- I recommend the size G (4.0 mm) one, as that goes with the most common yarn weight for a lot of amigurumi. Big Twist and Red Heart Super Saver are also both Worsted weight yarn, for which you use a G hook. If this is something you really want to do but are really tight on funds, I'm happy to get one of those hooks for you, just tell me how to get it to you.

I have a lot of other ideas for possible side gigs, which all will require a lot of work, but will return income. However, I'd just be spitballing, so hit me up if you want to talk shop. You know where to find me. ;P

[maria021015]

If I had written Teen Wolf and I wanted any of the Argents to be redeemable or that their moral code (moral codes are bullshit if you inherit your morals then they you will warp your actions to fit them but thats a personal philosophy) was worth something I wouldn’t have them make their money selling guns. That giant house for a family of three that they payed for by selling guns? If I wanted an audience to believe that they are trying to help people and that the cause is important to them they would not do it in such luxury. They could have had any day job an be regular hunters as a cover. Which also would have also been a cover to train Allison. Just something about them having enough money to fly off to France (while the teenagers that family tortured are still missing) just makes me flinch. And then the protagonists family has financial issues from the start. Melissa McCall makes sure to assure Scott that they will be ok if she misses a shift for his game. He knows enough about her financial situation that she thinks thats what he’s stressed about. Thats possibly why he got that job at the animal clinic. Its just such an odd choice and one reason I never liked Chris Argent.

It was never explained how the Argents actually accumulated their wealth - as I don’t think selling guns as a side hustle would have built up that much of a fortune. So it’s implied it must be generational wealth, or that maybe they got paid for some hunting jobs. The Calaveras clearly deal with money in their work so maybe the argents were the same.

Teen Wolf touched on the theme of money problems multiple times in the show but it never felt like it got followed through well. Like when the Stilinskis were struggling to pay Stiles’ medical bills and Eichen bills.

In terms of their morality, almost every single Argent in the show twists their own perception of reality and uses ‘the code’ to justify their actions that only serve their own personal beliefs or needs. They are almost all hypocrites.

Kate is a bit of an outlier because she never really claims to follow the code, her family just assumes that she is. She instead uses it as a cover up while she follows her own agenda (the one her father instilled in her, no doubt) of murdering werewolves because she considers them to be less than human and thus not worthy of life. We don’t ever see her hold any fear towards werewolves until she’s literally in Peter’s claws about to die. So she isn’t hunting them because she fears what they are capable of and wants to stop bad from happening (which is Chris’ reason). But Kate goes against her own beliefs when she chooses to stay alive and transition into a werejaguar. She becomes the very thing she has deemed as an animal unworthy of life. That’s pretty hypocritical, but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do to survive. From here, the show could have gone two ways that would have made much more sense than what they actually did. A - Kate could have shown inner conflict or turmoil about her decision, hating the ‘monster’ she’s become but also not being able to unalive herself. This would make sense for her later story arc where she helps Gerard start the supernatural war/genocide. Or, option B - Kate can change her opinion about the supernatural because she’s become one. She can embrace it. But then her later storyline wouldn’t have made sense.

Additionally, there is Victoria, who claims to stick to the code, but we see her break this to try and kill Scott - an innocent teenager - over something as trivial as dating her daughter behind her back. It takes some of the impact away from her death scene and it makes me beleive she doesn’t do this because of the code as she claims, but because she despises werewolves that much that she can’t bear to become one. Hence, she follows her own moral beliefs over the code.

We have talked about Allison, but to summarise, Allison does what Allison feels like doing and then twists her perception of reality afterwards to make herself feel better about it or to excuse what she’s done. She’s often driven by her personal feelings and goals, and is very much driven by her desire for power. Now, these traits don’t have to make her a bad person when balanced correctly, but Allison’s character wasn’t balanced and she didn’t have much of an arc. She never developed because no other character called her out on her behaviour because Scott thought the sun and moon shone out of Allison’s butt crack. Because Scott believed she could do no wrong, no one else would really say anything to her. The show marketed her in a way that was contradictory to her actions and who she actually was on screen.

Gerard’s hypocrisy is rooted in him going against his strongest beliefs (that the supernatural is the scum of the Earth) when he wants to become a werewolf after learning of his cancer. Big ol hypocrite!

Now for my favourite Argent, Chris. Now, I actually really liked Chris by the end of the show. I enjoyed his character arc. To me he always felt the most human of the Argents from the beginning (except for Allison until season 2). We consistently see Chris being the voice of reason and reminding his family about the code, pulling them away from what was wrong. Whilst he definitely wasn’t perfect, he was far better than the others, which I would give him credit for considering the family he was raised (and brainwashed) by. From his story about his best friend turning and comparing him to a rabid dog, we see Chris’ humanity and his purpose for what he does is due to fear of what werewolves are capable of. This isn’t his fault - all he has been taught is that they are animals who can’t control themselves, and like animals who act aggressively and harm others, they must be put down. Chris sees this isn’t true when he is forced to work with Scott and we see him open his mind to the supernatural because for the first time in his life he is seeing evidence that what he’s been taught isn’t the full truth. Some may argue he changes for Allison’s sake and is doing it to mend his relationship with his daughter, but we see him continue with this behaviour after Allison’s death. It proves he truly did change, which is a difficult thing to do for a man of his age, especially one who lived his life the opposite way for so long. I imagine being raised by Gerard with Kate as a sister wouldn’t have been easy. In comparison, Chris is very well adjusted.

[broodsys]

yelling into the void

my biggest issue lately is a deep fear about my future being uncertain. i'm very disabled, i'm easily fatigued, and i know i wouldn't be able to do any kind of "typical" job, although i might be able to do a full-time office job, but it'd wear on me a lot at the same time, esp re: getting there and back

but i don't think that, realistically, i can just... avoid having a job. i need to work

and part of my big spiral lately is that i recently found one job that actually seemed feasible, and, bonus, like something i'd actually enjoy doing and had some experience with. i knew it was unlikely that i would get it, but i still hoped, y'know? i just really wanted this one thing to go my way. but, no. got rejected for it. and i've been really bad about applying around, but it feels so pointless, y'know? like there was a time i was submitting 40+ apps and getting nothing. so now i'm being choosier and trying to do better at them but it's still getting me nowhere

and i'm just. really scared and exhausted and demoralized

i've thought a lot about applying for disability, but there are a lot of limitations if i go that route. plus it would be a Process and i'll probably get denied multiple times and may have to fight to retain my coverage and all these other things

and yknow. unmedicated adhd sucks. it sucks! i have so much trouble doing shit but i'm wary of getting medicated rn because of the shortages and all, and i honestly think it'd be worse for me to find something that works and have it be taken away than to continue on with all my weird structures and routines that sorta-kinda work

add to that a lot of continuing tensions in my household, a lot of... i won't get into it, but health risk factors also in my household... and a serious inability to prepare food and eat well regularly that isn't even so much linked to my disabilities as it is to my family situation, it just sucks. it's hard af and there doesn't seem to be a way out except a job... which i can't get

and what's extra frustrating is that i actually want to work. i think having a job, so long as it's something i can do wrt my disabilities, would help me a lot, even aside from relieving the fear. i do much better with external structure. i try to build my own strict routines and that does help, but external stuff has always worked better for me. i've thought about returning to school but finaid is already a little :/ about giving me more money bc i've gone through the dental assisting program only to immediately return to school to get my BA, plus honestly i wouldn't even know what to do besides use school as an intermediary external structure

but i want to work. i want to do things. and in an ideal world, i want a job that lets me help - people, the environment, whatever, just to do some good. i want money that i can donate to causes. i want to have a sense of even relative security in my life and future. and i can't get that by doing nothing but holy shit doing anything feels so pointless rn

so yeah, that's the biggest, most immediate hurdle i gotta get over now. have to pick up my hope or at least my stubbornness and try again and fail again and try again anyway and it sucks so much and i'm so tired but there's no alternative

[catboyidia]

Thoughts on asg having not only one kid but 3? (Aka the remnants)

im entirely on board with that thought, i think it would be entirely chaotic in every possible way! i do think they could figure out how to manage it though

being they’re first time parents and of three children, they probably have to play trial and error a lot, but i feel angeal is quickly able to pick up on each one of their quirks and sephiroth is able to strategize how to manage each of them, but poor genesis is stressed to hell and back and nearly ripping out his hair the entire time

i feel like infancy would be the easiest stage… meaning not easy at all because infants are usually a nightmare, and having three is most likely even worse! especially when its the remnants… i think baby loz would cling to angeal like his life depended on it, to the point angeal has to get one of those baby carriers that straps the baby to your chest, and none of the others would be able to settle loz no matter what. and i think kadaj would be an overall ultra fussy baby, none of them are getting sleep with him around and they all end up having to take shifts to care for him, although for some reason, after kadaj has started tiring himself out, sephiroth is the one that is for some reason able to put him to sleep. i think baby yazoo would be just an absolute angel though, like the perfect baby everyone would wish for, a little clingy but nothing near as bad as loz, and luckiky he doesn’t seem to have much of a parental preference so they’re all able to manage him quite easily.

i think toddler-childhood years with the remnants were a nightmare not only for asg but for yazoo and loz too for having to be brothers of kadaj! the remnants definitely gave asg a major run for their money, but mainly kadaj… kadaj was definitely a little asshole that would bully, fight, and steal loz and yazoo’s toys and such, and was definitely overall just very misbehaved, causing angeal to have to step in and issue punishments, meanwhile genesis was running around to try and sort everything out and help calm down a sobbing loz and sephiroth could probably calm yazoo with ease, although i dont think yazoo would be very bad, maybe a few tears here and there but sephiroth would just mainly have to talk yazoo out of trying to retaliate against kadaj… unfortunately, despite sephiroth’s efforts, genesis will be willing to look the other way on occasion when yazoo does retaliate.

teenage years were definitely the worst though, for everyone involved! genesis probably had to deal with each of their emotional problems, especially because teenage kadaj is most likely reminiscent of teenage genesis going through an angsty phase. loz still very much favors angeal, and i don’t think loz gets into much trouble, but i do think he’d be the most bullied of them all, so angeal would have to frequently try and help loz. angeal is definitely still the punishment giver though, although kadaj and sometimes yazoo dont always listen to angeal, so sephiroth has to step in instead, in which they know they’re in major trouble at that point. i feel like asg definitely raised them well enough that none of the remnants got into any truly bad trouble though, probably just doing the standard teenage angst kind of shit that would get them grounded for like a week.

overall, despite there definitely being plenty of ups and downs, i think asg would do pretty well with three kids! they would definitely be running around constantly but i think with just a bit of communication, the three of them would be able to manage the remnants, especially with each of the remnants having a different favorite parent. the remnants would ultimately grow up pretty well! healthy and happy for the most part! i think they’d be a really nice, healthy family at the end of day, especially when the remnants are all grown up

[sweetofsin]

anyway. i think it was yesterday that i started to slowly just feel not great, exhausted, depleted, depressed. and i was wondering why? oftentimes it's so easy for me to blame it on my body like oh maybe it's something cycle related, maybe because i'm not getting enough sleep, etc.

and of course those don't help the issue either... but it's also like. girl. you need people. you need friends. and yes, it's wonderful and beautiful to be able to talk to people online and in your phone, but you also need to *see* people. not just people out of obligation or because you have to. and family doesn't count either because it comes with all this baggage, past and present. you need to experience and be around people that you genuinely want to be around. that you feel comfortable with

like at my job, it's not super horrible but i still have to mask (to a certain extent.) none of them knows i'm gay, i don't feel comfortable sharing a lot of personal or private details because everyone shares things and talks too much. my coworkers are kind to me which is cool but you know. that's about it. i don't feel seen by any of them, most are there to gossip and get a check. that's about it

it's hard too cause sometimes i forget how necessary it is to go outside to places you love and enjoy and experience life with beautiful beings—because sometimes it takes a while before it really hits me. and then when it hits me, it starts spiraling downhill pretty quickly because it's already been so long, you know? i am trying to get better at that habit so that way it feels more balanced. but i also don't blame myself too much because in order to meet people and go out, you need money... a car... some type of transportation... and then you need people you genuinely enjoy and want to desire to go out with as well

it's also hard because sometimes i forget that life is not enjoyable when you're experiencing crumbs. you shouldn't have to force yourself and your body to be like, "well i should be happy because at least i have x!" like, gratitude is beautiful and important, indeed. it can be very easy to take things for granted in a world that teaches us to constantly compare and strive for more, when more isn't always better.

simultaneously, it's like. why am i shocked that even if my life doesn't feel extremely horrible right now, i'm slowly becoming depressed? it happens like this almost every time lol it's like i will expect for me to only feel genuinely depressed and exhausted when so many things are occurring or i'm experiencing a crisis. it's also an intellectualization thing too like, trying my best to just push through and understand and then when my body is like, "okay yeah we understand why these things are occurring but that doesn't mean you will emotionally feel completely fine and happy about it" is like, oh! right. yes.

alexithymia also doesn't help cause i'll literally have to sit there and analyze what is happening in my life to figure out why is my body So Exhausted and feeling so Weird and it's like, oh. right. yes. i see now

anywayz.... yes i'm allowed to experience depression and exhaustion—even if it doesn't feel like my life is in extreme shambles (especially compared to what i experienced earlier this year). if i'm literally missing out on core needs that makes most humans happy, then it makes sense that i would not... feel happy.

i believe i constantly underestimate the power that comes with experiencing life with people you love, making memories that are not just through the digital. although i do underestimate it less and less, because i've been lucky enough to have more experiences of what it's like to live life with people, so it becomes harder to ignore when my body is like, "babe! you need someone, rn. like... literally now. and you also need to go out and experience life. and places. not just laying in bed for most of the days and then wondering why your muscles and your body is cramping up. or wondering why you're depressed when your days have been similar on repeat and all you mainly know is the four walls of your house or your job."

one of the things that does suck is that connections take time to build 🙄 and i be wanting to speed run that shit sometimes because i'm like ughhhh but i want us to cry on each others shoulders and be excited and be super curious right now.... not some unprecedented amount of time later.... but i'm also completely okay with not speed running connections in praxis because tired of that experience and also it genuinely just sucks lmao

[shytastemakerthing]

I saw that your match ups were open and wanted to give it a shot. May I request a romantic twst matchup? I’m a Implagender omniromantic person that usually struggles a lot with my identity and personality, I’m south East Asian with tanned skin, dark maroon colored jellyfish cut, (but I usually put my bangs in a similar way like Haruka from pjsk cause I like putting on cute hair clips and head accessories). I’m usually pretty quiet around everyone but those I’m close to, I’m pretty loud and outgoing when I’m with people I get along with. I like to draw, play violin, cook, bake, and sew a lot. I’m really good with kids and bunch of other household tasks and I’ve done a lot of babysitting + doing a bunch of commissions for drawing and sewing things to earn extra money for myself since my family isn’t well off it also adds work experience I can put on resumes for the future. I’m pretty decent in school, although recently I’ve been doing a bit terrible since my motivation for school is going down and only finish stuff I feel like is easy/quick to complete. My love language is words of affirmation plus acts of service. I’m also really into fashion (specifically agejo hime and rokku gyaru + Ouji Fashion as well) and I love styling outfits. I want to become a kindergarten teacher in the future, and I’ve also composed a few songs on violin.

Hello! I'm so sorry that it has taken me this long to finally get back to answering these! Thank you so much for your patience!

Now, onto our match up!!

I match you with.......

Lilia Vanrouge

🦇 Okay, look, someone has to be able to ame care of the Diasomnia family and make sure none of then get killed because of Lilia's cooking and here you come in like an angel sent from above!

🦇 No, seriously, they all love you, they live your cooking, Malleus especially loves hearing you okay your violin (as someone who also plays violin), he finds it rather comforting, and he is extremely happy that Lilia has found someone after so long.

🦇 The fact that you love children has Lilia falling even harder for you. He has Silver, and while it took him some time to get used to raising a child, liking children, let alone one that was human, after fighting in a war essentially most of his life and seeing how you are so easily able to care for others, how you are with children, how it just comes so naturally to you? He feels his heart swell and warm up at the sight. It also makes him wonder how different things could have been without the war and all. But, what's done is done.

🦇 Okay, back to the happy. He LOVES seeing you interact with children. How they always are so quick to warm up to you, the smile you have on your face and thr laughter? He smiles every time.

🦇 As for motivation? Who better than Lilia? Between raising Silver, training he and Sebek as knights, taking care of Malleus, Lilia knows his way around how to best keep someone motivated. Are some of his methods out there?........ most likely. But he really does mean well and everyone can see that.

🦇 If words of affirmation are what you need, then words of affirmation you will be getting. From the moment that you get up to the moment you go to bed, he will be sparing nothing. You have woken up many times with a simple rose near you with a heart felt letter or even a hand written poem about all the things he loves about you. And acts of service is something he does in his day to day life as it is and it only intensifies when he is with you.

🦇 Now, Lilia is rather old, meaning he has seen a lot of fashion come and go throughout the centuries, and he has worn and tried out many of them. If you ever want him to model, feel free and ask him, but also expect him to send out a flirtatious remark or two. But he absolutely loves this either way. Meaning he will also help supply any materials you may need. You'll never run out again.

🦇 Money is not an issue with him, and even if so, he basically raised Malleus. Malleus sees you as a parental figure. As soon as he catches and kind of money and financial issues, literally the issues will evaporate.

🦇 Overall, bat dad can and will provide. He will help you through it all, and give you as many affirming words that you will need, he will help you with modeling your clothes at time just to see that smile on your face. Just save Diasomnia from his cooking and all will be well

[thelavendercatalogue]

LJS Hattrick Idea

I always liked the movie trope of people going back to where they were born and raised and either settling down or raising hell and basically after Lupins hit that’s basically what Jigen did

Jigen has always hated New York since he was younger to many bad memories to many bad decisions to much just bad luck all around

just all in all he looks at New York with disdain

Which is why he jumps at the chance to get back at the city which has taken so much from him, by going after all of the Mafia families affiliated with the group that put the hit out on his partner. Originally his idea was just to kill them all but because he started working with Zenigata, he also put a lot in jail

In the end however, despite his revenge working out, this however became a problem

Because since Zeni and him have practically wiped out the most major Syndicates, there’s a growing issue with the power dynamic that had settled in NY’s local mafia’s and because of this power imbalance, the cities mafia are basically at each others throats.

Which Jigen wouldn’t mind

he personally wants them to kill each other

Until he realizes that businesses that he and Lupin had built in NY are slowly falling apart because the imbalance. Businesses are suffering, clients are getting killed. All in all it’s a big shitshow

There’s also the issue, stemming from the fact that in the process of getting rid of high-balling major syndicates, that Jigen has basically been cemented as “Head” of all the families mostly due to infamy.

The savage blow establishing Jigens reputation. And while he doesn't WANT to be godfather, there's nothing stopping anyone from making him out to be one since he took over the Lupin gang after Lupin's accident and as a result people get mistaken that Jigens gonna run it like a mafia cause that's all he knows

Plus a lot of small time gangsters end up looking towards Jigen to help them settle power dynamics

Jigen also has to make sure no retaliation Mafia dont really have friends, they have business' associates and if Jigen cant curb the hostilities odds are he'd have to move his family

The reason hattrick comes into play, is because since becoming his partner, Zenigata had agreed to help clean up the fallout that killing/arresting large amounts of bigtimers has caused.

plus mostly cause the idea of Zeni posing as Jigen's body guard is soo hot

Because of this, Zenigata had disappeared from policing and went to go full bodyguard for a while

There could be a few solid reasons for why zeni's willing to go through with this:

no Lupin to chase after is the big one; he's bored out of his fking mind lol

he can also continue to keep an eye on jigen/ keep him in check

the police just aren't as effective in the States as they are elsewhere; they're more problematic/ cumbersome to work and deal with

Yata would probably be his only incentive to stay, but he's still pretty much out of the picture at this point

he can continue to work and do some good on the inside; dealing with the fallout continuing to provide anonymous tips to the police, etc

being able to do it full time would also mean less stress from having to constantly switch between the two sides and worry about blowing his cover

||and yes, ofc they can still fuck lmao||

It's still extremely temporary, but Zeni would stick around until jigen figures out who the fuck to put in charge so he can go back to Lupin when he heals up enough without worrying about the criminal underbelly of New York imploding :3

plus Jigen is also thinking about the gang

more allies on their side the more likely doing business in New York wont cost them a bullet in the head

people will look to them for business

big business big money

Because until Lupin is good enough to travel they’re kinda stuck in New York

Jigen is defiantly not going to leave him and if the others split they know where to come back in case

Plus with Zeni by his side, that means Jigen can teach Zenigata underground stuff just in case down the line he has to do undercover work again

Jigen keeping his side-boyfriend safe

Let’s just also say The pair

ahem mark their territory In a lot of places xD