#fatal-optimist

[sollux-captor]

I think I might know you?? I used to talk to someone who looked just like you so long ago

m4y83 u h4v3, 1dk 7h0 1 h4v3 73rr18l3 m3m0ry l0l0l0l

[gregmarriage]

someone talk to meeeeeeee!!! 👉🏻🥺👈🏻

[flock-of-cassowaries]

Canadian, but we got to watch it as it happened! Because our classrooms had TVs!

…and our teachers (high school) had poor judgment!

.👍👍👍

Guys, I need to know something (if you're american)

[stonesandswords]

.

[felassan]

Jason Schreier for Bloomberg reports: 'Inside the ‘Dragon Age’ Debacle That Gutted EA’s BioWare Studio'

The latest game in BioWare’s fantasy role-playing series went through ten years of development turmoil. The failure of Dragon Age: The Veilguard, released in October, led EA to gut BioWare

[note: article is below cut after these tweets]

Jason Schreier: "NEW: What went wrong with Dragon Age: The Veilguard? Why was the writing so tonally inconsistent? Why did it feel so shallow? Why were there so few choices? Really, after ten years of turbulence, it was a miracle that anything came out at all. This is the story [link]:" [source]

Jason Schreier: "The fatal flaw for Dragon Age: The Veilguard wasn't just that it pivoted from single-player to multiplayer and back again. It was that after the second pivot, the team was forced to keep going rather than hit the reset button and take the time to create a new plan." [source]

Jason Schreier re: this old tweet from Casey Hudson: "Fun fact: when I first reported at Kotaku in 2018 that Dragon Age 4 was rebooted to become a live-service game, BioWare studio head Casey Hudson wrote this on Twitter. But it was not entirely truthful. In reality, the game was being designed around cooperative multiplayer, replayable missions, etc" [source] Casey Hudson's old tweet from 2018: "Reading lots of feedback regarding Dragon Age, and I think you'll be relieved to see what the team is working on. Story & character focused. Too early to talk details, but when we talk about "live" it just means designing a game for continued storytelling after the main story."

Rest of post/article under cut due to length.

(bold in the text below is mine for emphasis)

"In early November, on the eve of the crucial holiday shopping season, staffers at the video-game studio BioWare were feeling optimistic. After an excruciating development cycle, they had finally released their latest game, Dragon Age: The Veilguard, and the early reception was largely positive. The role-playing game was topping sales charts on Steam, and solid, if not spectacular, reviews were rolling in. But in the weeks that followed, the early buzz cooled as players delved deeper into the fantasy world, and some BioWare employees grew anxious. For months, everyone at the subsidiary of the video-game publisher Electronic Arts Inc. had been under intense pressure. The studio’s previous two games, Mass Effect: Andromeda and Anthem, had flopped, and there were rumors that if Dragon Age underperformed, BioWare might become another of EA’s many casualties. Not long after Christmas, the bad news surfaced. EA announced in January that the new Dragon Age had only reached 1.5 million players, missing the company’s expectations by 50%. The holiday performance of another recently released title, EA Sports FC 2025, was also subpar, compounding the problem."

"As a result of the struggling titles, EA Chief Executive Officer Andrew Wilson explained, the company would be significantly lowering its sales forecast for the fiscal year ahead. EA’s share price promptly plunged 18%. “Dragon Age had a high-quality launch and was well-reviewed by critics and those who played,” Wilson later said on an earnings call. “However, it did not resonate with a broad enough audience in this highly competitive market.” Days after the sales revision, EA laid off a chunk of BioWare’s staff at the studio’s headquarters in Edmonton, Canada, and permanently transferred many of the remaining workers to other divisions. For the storied, 30-year-old game maker, it was a stunning fall that left many fans wondering how things had gone so haywire — and what might come next for the stricken studio. According to interviews with nearly two dozen people who worked on Dragon Age: The Veilguard, there were several reasons behind its failure, including marketing misfires, poor word of mouth and a 10-year gap since the previous title. Above all, sources point to the rebooting of the product from a single-player game to a multiplayer one — and then back again — a switcheroo that muddled development and inflated the title’s budget, they say, ultimately setting the stage for EA’s potentially unrealistic sales expectations. A spokesperson for EA declined to comment."

"The union between BioWare and EA started off with lofty aspirations. In 2007, EA executives announced they were acquiring BioWare and another gaming studio in a deal worth $860 million. The goal was to diversify their slate of games, which was heavy in sports titles, like Madden NFL, and light in the kind of adventure and role-playing games that BioWare was known for. Initially, it looked like a smart move thanks to a string of big hits. In 2014, BioWare released Dragon Age: Inquisition, the third installment in a popular action series dropping players in a semi-open world full of magic, elves and fire-spewing dragons. The fantasy title went on to win the much-coveted Game of the Year Award and sell 12 million copies, according to its executive producer Mark Darrah — a major validation of EA’s diversification strategy. Before long, Darrah and Mike Laidlaw, the creative director, began kicking around ideas for the next Dragon Age installment — code name: Joplin — aiming for a game that would be smaller in scope. But before much could get done, BioWare shifted the studio’s focus to more pressing titles coming down the pike. In 2017, BioWare released Mass Effect: Andromeda, the fourth installment in a big-budget action series set in space. Unlike its critically successful predecessors, the game received mediocre reviews and was widely mocked by fans. A few months after the disappointing release, the head of BioWare stepped down and was soon replaced by Microsoft Inc.’s Casey Hudson, an alumni of BioWare’s early, formative years."

"Like much of the industry, EA executives were growing increasingly enamored of so-called live-service games, such as Destiny and Overwatch, in which players continue to engage with and spend money on a title for months or even years after its initial release. With EA aiming to make a splash in the fast-growing category, BioWare poured resources into Anthem, a live-service shooter game that checked all the right boxes. One day in October 2017, Laidlaw summoned his colleagues into a conference room and pulled out a few pricey bottles of whisky. The next Dragon Age sequel, he told the room, would also be pivoting to an online, live-service game — a decision from above that he disagreed with. He was resigning from the studio. The assembled staff stayed late through the night, drinking and reminiscing about the franchise they loved. “I wish that pivot had never occurred,” Darrah would later recount on YouTube. “EA said, ‘Make this a live service.’ We said, ‘We don’t know how to do that. We should basically start the project over.’” Former art director Matt Goldman replaced Laidlaw as creative director, and with a tiny team began pushing ahead on a new multiplayer version of Dragon Age — code name: Morrison — while everyone else helped to finish Anthem, which was struggling to coalesce. Goldman pushed for a “pulpy,” more lighthearted tone than previous entries, which suited an online game but was a drastic departure from the dark, dynamic stories that fans loved in the fantasy series."

"In February 2019, BioWare released Anthem. Reviews were scathing, calling the game tedious and convoluted. Fans were similarly displeased. On social media, players demanded to know why a studio renowned for beloved stories and characters had made an online shooter with a scattershot narrative. In the wake of BioWare’s second consecutive flop, the multiplayer version of Dragon Age continued to take shape. While the previous games in the franchise had featured tactical combat, this one would be all action. Instead of quests that players would only experience once, it would be full of missions that could be replayed repeatedly with friends and strangers. Important characters couldn’t die because they had to persist for multiple players across never-ending gameplay. As the game evolved over the next two years, the failure of Anthem hovered over the studio. Were they making the same mistakes? Some BioWare employees scoffed that they were simply building “Anthem with dragons.” Throughout 2020, the pandemic disrupted the game’s already fraught development. In December, Hudson, the head of the studio, and Darrah, the head of the franchise, resigned. Shortly thereafter, Gary McKay, BioWare’s new studio head, revealed yet another shift in strategy. Moving forward, the next Dragon Age would no longer be multiplayer."

"“We were thinking, ‘Does this make sense, does this play into our strengths, or is this going to be another challenge we have to face?’” McKay later told Bloomberg News. “No, we need to get back to what we’re really great at.” In theory, the reversion back to Dragon Age’s tried-and-true, single-player format should have been welcome news inside BioWare. But there was a catch. Typically, this kind of pivot would be coupled with a reset and a period of pre-production allowing the designers to formulate a new vision for the game. Instead, the team was asked to change the game’s fundamental structure and recast the entire story on the fly, according to people familiar with the new marching orders. They were given a year and a half to finish and told to aim for as wide a market as possible. This strict deadline became a recurring problem. The development team would make decisions believing that they had less than a year to release the game, which severely limited the stories they could tell and the world they could build. Then the title would inevitably be delayed a few months, at which point they’d be stuck with those old decisions with no chance to stop and reevaluate what was working. At the end of 2022, amid continually dizzying leadership changes, the studio started distributing an “alpha” build of Dragon Age to get feedback internally and from outside playtesters. According to people familiar with the process, the reactions were concerning. The game’s biggest problem, early players agreed, was a lack of satisfying choices and consequences. Previous BioWare titles had presented players with gut-wrenching decisions. Which allies to save? Which factions to spare? Which enemies to slay? Such dilemmas made fans feel like they were shaping the narrative — historically, a big draw for many BioWare games."

"But Dragon Age’s multiplayer roots limited such choices, according to people familiar with the development. BioWare delayed the game’s release again while the team shoehorned in a few major decisions, such as which of two cities to save from a dragon attack. But because most of the parameters were already well established, the designers struggled to pair the newly retrofitted choices for players with meaningful consequences downstream. In 2023, to help finish Dragon Age, BioWare brought in a second, internal team, which was working on the next Mass Effect game. For decades there’d been tension between the two well-established camps, known for their starkly divergent ways of doing things. BioWare developers like to joke that the Dragon Age crew was like a pirate ship, meandering and sometimes traveling off course but eventually reaching the port. In contrast, the Mass Effect group was called the USS Enterprise, after the Star Trek ship, because commands were issued straight down from the top and executed zealously. As the Mass Effect directors took control, they scoffed that the Dragon Age squad had been doing a shoddy job and began excluding their leaders from pivotal meetings, according to people familiar with the internal friction. Over time, the Mass Effect team went on to overhaul parts of the game and design a number of additional scenes, including a rich, emotional finale that players loved. But even changes that appeared to improve the game stoked the simmering rancor inside BioWare, infuriating Dragon Age leaders who had been told they didn’t have the budget for such big, ambitious swings."

"“It always seemed that, when the Mass Effect team made its demands in meetings with EA regarding the resources it needed, it got its way,” said David Gaider, a former lead writer on the Dragon Age franchise who left before development of the new game started. “But Dragon Age always had to fight against headwinds.” Early testers and Mass Effect leads complained about the game’s snarky tone — a style of video-game storytelling, once ascendant, that was quickly falling out of fashion in pop culture but had been part of Goldman’s vision for the multiplayer game. Worried that Dragon Age could face the same outcome as Forspoken — a recent title that had been hammered over its impertinent banter — BioWare leaders ordered a belated rewrite of the game’s dialogue to make it sound more serious. (In the end, the resulting tonal inconsistencies would only add to the game’s poor reception with fans.) A mass layoff at BioWare and a mandate to work overtime depleted morale while a voice actors strike limited the writers’ ability to revise the dialogue and create new scenes. An initial trailer made the next Dragon Age seem more like Fortnite than a dark fantasy role-playing game, triggering concerns that EA didn’t know how to market the game. When Dragon Age: The Veilguard finally premiered on Halloween 2024 after many internal delays, some staff members thought there was a lot to like, including the game’s new combat system. But players were less impressed, and sales sputtered."

"“The reactions of the fan base are mixed, to put it gently,” said Caitie, a popular Dragon Age YouTuber. “Some, like myself, adore it for various reasons. Others feel utterly betrayed by certain design choices.” Following the layoffs and staff reassignments at BioWare earlier in the year, a small team of a few dozen employees is now working on the next Mass Effect. After three high-profile failures in a row, questions linger about EA’s commitment to the studio. In May, the company relabeled its Edmonton headquarters from a BioWare office to a hub for all EA staff in the area. Historically, BioWare has never been the most important studio at EA, which generates more than $7 billion in annual revenue largely from its sports games and shooters. Depending on the timing of its launches, BioWare typically accounts for just 5% of EA’s annual bookings, according to estimates by Colin Sebastian, an analyst with Robert W. Baird & Co. Even so, there may be strategic reasons for EA to keep supporting BioWare. Single-player role-playing games are expensive to make but can lead to huge windfalls when successful, as demonstrated by recent hits like Cyberpunk 2077, Elden Ring and Baldur’s Gate 3. In order to grow, EA needs more than just sports franchises, said TD Cowen analyst Doug Creutz. Trying to fix its fantasy-focused studio may be easier than starting something new. “That said, if they shuttered the doors tomorrow I wouldn’t be totally surprised,” Creutz added. “It has been over a decade since they produced a hit.”"

Article by Jason Schreier. [source]

[insignificant457]

sorry i’m just thinking again about kaz brekker, perpetual cynic, and his surprisingly optimistic view of fathers and sons. just. kaz knowing that the one thing that would ruin pekka rollins, the man he hates more than anything, who he couldn’t think less of, would be to threaten the safety of his son. kaz telling jesper that his father cares more about him than any farm. kaz saying “call me sentimental, but i didn’t believe a father could be so callous.” kaz’s fatal misunderstanding of van eck being that he couldn’t conceive of a world in which fathers don’t love their sons. thinking about what all this says about kaz’s own father, and everything he lost before he and jordie ever stepped foot in ketterdam.

[homunculus-argument]

I remember this story mom told me and my sister when we were little. Two frogs fall into a milk churn, and start swimming to stay on the surface. After a long time, one of the frogs tells the other that it's tired of swimming, and is just going to give up now. The frog sinks and drowns, while the other frog keeps swimming. Eventually the surviving frog that never gave up has been swimming for so long that the milk has been churned into butter, and the frog can hop out. The moral of the story is that life feels hopeless a lot, but if you give in to despair, you fucking die.

I had two aunts from my father's side. I don't remember anything about one of them, she died when I was three years old. We were never lied to about how it happened. She killed herself, jumped out of a window. She gave in to despair. My paternal grandmother lost her mind over the grief, developing dementia overnight. I never knew her as a sane, coherent person. She gave in to the despair. That's what I was taught, that's how I was raised. Life is pain, but if you give in to the despair, you fucking die.

I am an optimist. Always have been. I had to be. Indulging in pessimistic fatalism was a luxury that I could not afford. I'm not an optimist out of some naive lack of awareness that life can be bad sometimes. I grew up very familiar with how bad life can be. I was an optimist in believing - against all the proof of the contrary - that life could be other things, too. That it's possible that there could be a life that doesn't hurt all the time.

I can't afford to be a pessimist. I don't pretend to believe that things will never get bad, but I have no choice but to believe that no matter how bad things will get, there can be good things in life, no matter what. I don't talk to my family anymore, but I did survive being raised by them. The ones who give up hope don't make it. If you let the darkness seep in, and give in to despair, you die.

[libertyvigil]

Russian opposition are often really a breath of fresh air even though they are fragmented and sometimes not as focused and brave as they need to be. They see beyond the virulent hatred of the zorcs and hate only the government and its supporters. They love their people and they like Ukrainians. They don't hate them and have good things to day about them (I exclude anyone who is supposedly antiwar but pro annexation, pro keeping annexed territories, if they exist)

And they actually take action whether it's through words or deeds, some speaking up through social media and risking long prison terms (and possibly worse) or fighting alongside Ukrainians, or working behind the scenes, such as saboteurs. And the people who have helped filtered Ukrainians escape russia.

[twilightofthesandwiches]

Interesting that Ralsei's Title in Chapter 4 describes him as 'facing the fate' by default.

While Susie either 'carries out fate" or "faces fate" depending on whatever or not she managed to beat Gerson

With Gerson's whole thing about encouraging her to write her own story and make her own ending... Obviously Susie is pretty rebellious and optimistic already, and denies the ending of the 'True Prophecy' on all Playthroughs, but I guess the implications here that maybe Gerson gives her the resolve (and the big fuck-off Axe) to truly carry on that Rebellious Spirit until the end.

On the one hand, I guess that really demonstrate what Ralsei was saying, how despite his own fatalism he really was hoping he could change the Prophecy, by just 'being nice'. He was always kinda 'facing the fate' in his own way.

But on the other hand, it also feels really notable how Susie is still the only one who can abandon the Title of the 'Dark Hero' for one that reaffirms her own identity, choices and legacy, the "Axe of Justice".

And meanwhile, Kris has no choice but to be one who "carries out fate".

That is their Title no matter what you do...I mean unless you do the Weird Route but that's probably the even worse option

[pixiepipedreams]

♡ ˙ ˖ ✧ — nobody's promised tomorrow // gi-hun x reader

♡  ⁄  pairing: gi-hun x reader ♡  ⁄  warnings & tags: fem!reader, canon-typical violence & death, major character death (reader dies), age gap (reader is 20-22, gi-hun is late 40s, early 50s) season 1 ♡  ⁄ wordcount: 3.1k ♡  ⁄ summary: you and gi-hun had bonded early in the games, his goofy friendliness drawing you in like a moth to the flame. side-by-side, you made it through most of the games. but, finding yourself mortally wounded after glass stepping stones, you realize you won't be making it to the end with him. he used your age gap like a wall to prevent anything more to rise between you, but you know your interest in him is reciprocated. now, it's your last chance to admit to everything you feel for him.

﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵ ﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵

It was your fault, maybe, for thinking these games were fair at their core. That was the thing that kept you going, through all of it - Red Light Green Light, Tug of War, Honeycomb, even Marbles. Everyone was an equal, here. The one man who cheated was garishly strung up, bloody and horrific, for everyone to see. It had made you feel violently ill, but at the same time, it reassured you. Just like everyone else, you had a fair chance.

Nothing about this is fair.

Quiet guilt eats away at you for keeping your wound a secret through dinner. You made it through the last game in the nick of time, and before you could even celebrate, the glass exploded. Your world became narrowed down to a sharp, blinding pain in your stomach. You didn't have time to look and see, just covering it with a jacket and hoping for the best.

When the three of you returned to the dormitories, you huddled on your bed, watching as Gi-hun and Sang-woo started arguing the way only childhood friends and siblings can. But the foundational moral difference between them is a hurdle that neither can jump, and you wouldn't be able to stop the argument if you tried.

Gi-hun is an optimist, an idealist, who believes in the good in people. So are you, but... you know that Sang-woo is the only reason Gi-hun is alive right now. You don't know if you would have had the stomach to push that guy, but it saved him.

The guards come in, effectively stopping the argument. They're carrying three black boxes with a gift bow on each. "Players, we sincerely congratulate and commend you all for successfully making it through the first five games. The three of you are now the finalists and as such, we have prepared a special gift for each of you. Before we reveal the gift, please take a moment to change into the outfits we have brought."

You're grateful to be the only girl left, getting the bathroom to yourself. You undress carefully, and it takes a moment to will yourself to even look at your stomach.

The glass piece embedded in your stomach was too large to be anything but fatal. Your hands shook as you pulled it out, crying out in pain. You feel weak, head spinning, and it takes all of your willpower to not crumble. You rip up your shirt into strips, each movement making you grit your teeth in pain. Trembling hands wrap each strip tightly around your abdomen, tears stinging your eyes, until you've patched it up enough to maybe stop the bleeding.

You can only hope that it's actually enough.

Your blood stains your hands, even after you wash them - or maybe it's a trick of the eyes, your very soul feeling stained. You splash your face with water, change into the suit from the gift box, and leave the restroom.

The dinner is tense, silent. The food smells delicious, and it's probably expensive, but it makes your stomach turn. You manage to eat half of your plate, knowing that if you survive, you'll need your strength.

Your eyes keep flicking to Gi-hun, watching him as he watches Sang-woo.

Gi-hun had come into this game with such bumbling light that it had been impossible not to be drawn to it. He always seemed to be smiling, or in motion, or trying to make someone laugh. He made everything, even this dire place, brighter.

And if the sparkle in his eyes caused a fluttering in your chest... that's something you couldn't admit to.

Sometimes, you liked to fool yourself into thinking that he looked at you with interest, sometimes. You'd bonded quickly, trying to keep up morale, and sometimes, you'd catch a lingering gaze from him. He was always quick to point out how young you are - too young to be in a place like this, but you've been living on your own as an adult since 18. You know how the world works, the toll it takes on you.

He's old enough to be your father, but he's nowhere near as jaded and cynical as that man is. Gi-hun is all things light and good about the world. He's made mistakes, ones that have piled up, but so have you, haven't you? You wouldn't be in a place like this if you weren't.

So he kept a barrier between the two of you, even as he let you creep closer and closer to him, as he let you cry in his arms one night, or gave you half his share of food. Too young, too young, too young. It felt like more of an excuse, than anything else. And you joked right back, calling him an old man, saying he has too much life experience.

But as the games went on, his smile slowly became less frequent. It took him a moment to laugh, like he'd forgotten it was allowed. Especially after the death of Il-nam.

His gaze became harder. And now, that gaze is focused on Sang-woo.

The steak knife feels like a warning, a bad omen, and you know you wouldn't have the strength to push its sharp edge into someone's body right now, but you take it to your bed, anyways.

It doesn't surprise you that Gi-hun walks over to join you, sitting on the ground beside you and staring across the room at his old friend.

You feel so, so tired. But you're terrified that if you fall asleep, you won't wake up.

Your hand reaches over, touching his shoulder, wishing he'd let you touch him more than that. You want to sink your hand into his full hair, press your forehead to his, curl up in his lap. You want to kiss him, to forget everything - you may as well admit it now, at least to yourself.

"Gi-hun," you murmur, squeezing his shoulder. "Promise me something?"

He doesn't react for a moment, then slowly looks up at you. "What?" Something in his eyes seems to settle, the longer he looks at you, but he's still on edge, wary. Something else, too - protective.

"Whichever one of us gets out... we take care of each other's family. Your mom and daughter, my siblings back home." It's hard to keep the wobble out of your voice, the knowledge that you've been sitting with that you won't make it to morning.

Gi-hun stares up at you, eyes softening at the edges. "Of course, I promise. But it doesn't matter, we're both making it out of here. We just have to outlast him." He turns to look at Sang-woo again, and you can't bear it, how these games have changed him so much. You cup his cheek, turning his head back to look at you.

His eyes go wide with surprise, but he doesn't look away. He just swallows. "Gi-hun," you say, again, like his name alone could save you. "There's... there's so many things I haven't said, I--"

"Why are you saying all this?" he asks, his brows furrowing, concern entering his expression. His hand reaches out to grab your waist, and you stifle a cry of pain.

He almost never reaches out to touch you on his own. You can count on one hand the times his hand has grabbed your arm, or brushed a strand of hair away from your face, or found your own. You don't even need all 5 fingers. His eyes go wide, and he pushes himself up, squatting next to you, his hand pushing aside the suit jacket. Blood seeps through the white button-down, staining you.

You smile weakly. If these games were fair, the glass wouldn't have hit you. You would have been safe, once you made it to the other side. What a dumb way to die, after everything. You didn't even lose the damn game.

"(Y/N)--" he gets out, voice choked, and he tugs up the shirt, a desperate look in his eyes. It would make you blush, if you hadn't already lost so much blood. If this were a different life, and he was pulling up your shirt for any other reason. He stares at your makeshift bandaging, a tremor in his hand as he brushes the blood on the skin of your stomach. "What happened?"

"Glass hit me," you say, eyes searching his expression. You couldn't take your eyes off of him even if you wanted to. "I... I don't think I'll make it to morning," you add, voice hushed, like it's a secret. And, even if you do make it to tomorrow, you definitely won't have enough strength for the final game. Gi-hun can only protect you so much.

Gi-hun's wide eyes instantly flick up to meet yours, his lips slightly parted in a hopeless little look. You want to kiss his sadness away. "Don't say that," he murmurs, his free hand rising up to cup your cheek. You instantly lean into the touch, wishing it could melt everything else away.

You sigh, eyes slightly glazed but focused solely on his face, wondering if it would be peaceful to die in his arms. Comforting.

Gi-hun notices how you stare at him... like he's the last thing you want to see. Your face is pale, even your lips almost colorless, and he knows, deep in his gut, that you're right. The blood has soaked through the fabric of your makeshift bandage, is smeared on his other hand. So many thoughts race through his mind - that you're the last person who deserved this, how nothing in this world is fair, how he wishes... wishes... He gently brushed your hair away from your face as his fingers slowly caress your cheek. He's trying desperately, futilely, to keep a tight lock on his emotions, his heart hammering. But panic is setting in, and something that feels an awful lot like heartbreak - no, scratch that. His heart is shattering.

"Please." His eyes scanned your face, committing every detail to memory. "Don't go."

His shaky words hit you like a large shard of glass to the stomach. Tears slip out of your eyes, tracing a path down your cheeks. You'd stay if I you could. "You've already watched 453 people die, Gi-hun," you say, aiming for a light tone. As if anything about this situation could be light. "What's one more?"

"It's different, you know it is, I--" He cuts himself off, clamping his lips shut, his big sad eyes never leaving your face.

You smile shakily. "What would it have been like, if we met somewhere else, anywhere else? Out in the real world?" It's impossible, now, to keep your feelings for him out of your mind, out of your gaze, out of your words. You need him to know, know that whatever he feels for you - and you know he feels something that he refuses to admit to - you return it tenfold.

Gi-hun's eyebrows draw together, his lips slanting uncertainly. "I don't know..." he murmurs, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone. "You're... you're so young..."

You close your eyes, taking a deep breath. Trying to be strong. Brave. His words are an admission to that underlying something, and you can understand that the reality of your age gap might be too much. But you want to live in the fantasy, the impossible world where you would be allowed to act on your feelings. Not the world where you're dying in his arms. "I think... you'd come into the convenience store I worked at. Just every once in a while. but then, you'd start showing up more, and we'd talk." You give a shaky laugh, sniffling, heart aching. "You do love talking, even to people you don't know. Used to be such a chatterbox, when these games started. And I'd look forward to your every late night visit. I'd have such a big crush one you-" You cut yourself off, taking a shaky breath, more tears slipping down your cheeks. "But I would know, even in that world you'd never let yourself want me back. Too young for you."

Gi-hun stares at you with parted lips, his eyes wide in shock. The unspoken thing between you, finally being voiced, it's too much. His eyes are teary, and you still have tears sliding down your cheeks. "Maybe you're right," he whispers. "I'm... so much older than you. I don't think anyone as young as you, so full of life, should end up with someone like me..."

You huff out a breath. You're not exactly full of life, now. Time is running short, the sand falling away to almost nothing. You sigh softly, gripping his bloody hand. "So we're doomed, in every life?" you ask shakily. "I'm dying, Gi-hun. And you still can't let yourself want me back." Your breath catches, and you feel so weak, resting your head on his shoulder. "I wouldn't care, how old you are. Maybe I'd ask you to get a drink with me, one night, if I got off early. And I'd buy us soju, and we'd talk. And when I was tipsy enough, bold enough, courageous enough… I'd try to kiss you." You swallow. "I think you'd let me kiss you, for just a moment. Maybe you'd slip, kiss me back. Just for a moment, a single, perfect moment. But then you'd pull away. And maybe you'd leave, telling me you're too old for me. But I'd want you all the same."

Gi-hun squeezes your hand tightly, and you're grateful you can't see the anguish on his face. "Yeah. Yeah, I'd pull away, after a moment," he replies quietly, but that's an admission too. He would allow the kiss, could see himself kissing back. "I'd walk away. I'd have to."

You can see it so perfectly, the late night in the city, outside a bar. "But I wouldn't want you to. Maybe I'd chase after you. In the street, late at night, the pavement wet from rain that's still falling…. I wouldn't want to let you go." You feel choked, but you can't stop talking, more tears rising and falling. "I'd tell you that I don't care how old you are, that what I feel for you is real. That I'd be happy to be yours. I'd tell you that just because you think you're too old, too fucked up for me, that it doesn't matter. That every day when I saw your goofy face, my life became a little brighter. That you made me so happy, that... that I wanted to be yours. That you deserve happiness. I'd ask... I'd ask if you thought I could make you happy, if I wasn't so much younger than you..." Your throat is too choked up to continue, tears strangling you, your own emotions threatening to overwhelm you.

His voice is raspy and low when he replies. "It doesn't matter. You're too young, too young to want me."

You give a humorless laugh. "See, but then I'd point out that you're not playing the game right. If I wasn't too young for you… do you think you'd be happy, being with me? If you kept insisting I was too young, that's… that's not the same thing as saying you don't want me, my Gi-hun."

His breath stutters, a sob-like sound slipping from his throat, as if you're dismantling every defense he has. "Yes," he whispers, the confession wrenched from him. "I'd be happy. I'd be the happiest man... if I could have you."

Something rattling inside your chest settles, feeling laid to rest. Your body slumps slightly against his, your face burrowing in his neck. "If I kissed you again, right then and there... would you push me away again? Would you let me? Would you kiss me back?"

His breath is ragged, obviously struggling with all the emotions he'd shoved away, and the reality of the situation overrides the fantasy. Still, he replies, his voice quiet and shaky. "I'd kiss you back. I'd... I'd pull you closer... and it would be too late, for me. I'd never let you go."

You sigh, the idea comforting you. Maybe it's all in your head, a shared fantasy, but it's yours. And his. "In that life, I think we'd make each other so happy. We'd be poor, but happy," you whisper.

He cups your cheek, pulling your head away from his neck. His face swims in your vision, and you fight to focus, focus on him and him alone. His other hand squeezes yours. He gazes deep into your eyes, every flicker of emotion obvious on his face. He's fighting his feelings, like he has been for days now, but for once, he's losing the battle. His breath shakes.

You make the first move, like you always seem to. With every last ounce of strength, you lean in and capture his lips with your own. You want this, want everything with him, but you know that all you have is this moment. So you kiss him, with every ounce of yourself that is left.

His breath is ragged, and he kisses you back with the same desperate edge of your own lips. He kisses you like he's starving, like he's trying to remember every last detail. His other hand slips from yours, wrapping around you, careful to not hold you too tight and hurt you further. He makes a small noise as he deepens the kiss, and you can feel the wetness of your cheeks, but you can't tell which one of you is crying.

You press your now free hand to his chest, over his heart. Your own heart is pounding as much as it can, but it's still a weak flutter compared to his. Everything about him tastes alive, and you give a small whimper, trying to forget everything else. You don't know if you believe in heaven, but if this is the closest you'll get, you don't mind.

"Gi-hun," you whisper between kisses, and he moans faintly, his hand sliding into your hair.

He whispers your name, over and over, like a prayer, a desperate plead. You press your forehead to his, trying not to sob. "I-I should have done that so long ago, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry (Y/N)--"

"Yes, you should have," you whisper, trying to infuse some light-heartedness into your tone, your hand stroking his face. "But I love you, even when you're a coward." If it's your last chance to say it, you may as well admit that you love him. "Win, for me. And once you've won, don't forget me. And don't forget yourself. Don't forget how special you are, how kind you are, how you deserve to be happy, to be loved. I would love you for the rest of my life if I could." You smile sadly. "Well. I guess I am, loving you for the rest of my life."

Gi-hun gives a broken noise, clinging to you desperately. You can see the tears falling down his face, mirroring your own. "I could never forget you," he whispers, his eyes wide, filled with anguish. "I--" His voice chokes up, and he kisses your cheeks.

It's okay, that he can't say it back. Your eyes slip shut, and you're so tired, so damn tired. You have nothing left inside you. Everything fades but his touch, the world feeling like a distant dream.

Faintly, you hear him sob, can feel his hands cling to your face, your arm. Your face is pressed against your chest, and even that feels far away, detached, like it's happening to someone else.

The last words you hear - or maybe it's your mind, making up what you want to hear in your final moments - are him whispering your name. "I-I love you too, I love you, (Y/N), please..."

It all slips away, like a dream. Horrible and perfect at the same time.

[thelcsdaily]

It's Not A Farewell...

I want to let you know that I am taking a break in order to focus on my health. I currently have stage 4 cancer. Even if the situation may appear dire with the help of my loved ones, prayers, and all of you out there, I continue to hold out hope that I will be able to triumphantly beat this fatal illness.

When I reflect on this journey, I'm amazed at how far we've come together. Despite having numerous options, you decided to visit this blog. I would want to take this opportunity to express my gratitude for your unwavering support and encouragement, which have been the foundation of my journey. To all of the amazing people out there, I want to show my love and appreciation. I am very happy and grateful that you are a part of my journey.

With gratitude and my heartfelt thanks to each and every one of you,

LC

“Do not get lost in a sea of despair. Be hopeful, be optimistic. Our struggle is not the struggle of a day, a week, a month, or a year, it is the struggle of a lifetime. Never, ever be afraid to make some noise and get in good trouble, necessary trouble.” — John Lewis

[nottobehornyonthemain]

Crowley’s fatal flaw is curiosity. He is fundamentally an optimist, although he tries not to be. He likes to explore, and snoop around places he shouldn’t go, and ask questions, and use the funny new human technologies. He likes watching things grow. He’s a creator.

His first gift to humanity was knowledge.

Now Aziraphale is fundamentally a realist, even a pessimist. Before he even knew that it was possible to Fall, he was afraid about what seeming to go up against The Plan could mean. He worries about the potential horrible outcomes of everything, even going unarmed into the wilderness. He wants to keep everyone safe, even if that sometimes means doing hard things to ensure an ultimate good. He’s a protector.

His first gift to humanity was a weapon.

One of these beings usually sits in a shop devoted to the passing on of knowledge, but doesn’t actually want to pass it on to anyone. One of these beings refuses to bring harm any innocent thing when there is a chance he can reduce suffering.

Heaven has assumed that Aziraphale’s fatal flaw is that he’s soft, and weak willed. That he’s someone easy to manipulate. But they’re wrong. Because Aziraphale is not soft, and his fatal flaw is his inability to compromise on his beliefs.

Now, I don’t know about anyone else. But to me, one of those two beings sounds a lot more unpredictable and dangerous than the other, and it’s not the one currently crying to Michael Bublé in a car full of plants. The one I’m more concerned about is currently being given the tools to bring about the end of the world.

And God knows what he did with the last tool heaven gave him.

[goodnightmemes]

AGATHA ALL ALONG SENTENCE STARTERS

❛ You don't seem like yourself. ❜

❛ If you wanna be in control, you can be. ❜

❛ Is this really how you see yourself? ❜

❛ Do you remember why you hate me? ❜

❛ The things that you're roasting me for are the things that make me dangerous. ❜

❛ How long have I been here? ❜

❛ Call me "nosy," I'll cut out your tongue. ❜

❛ Can you put on some clothes? 'Cause you... 'Cause you're naked. ❜

❛ Do you remember pain? It kind of tickles, doesn't it? ❜

❛ Maybe I can't kill you, but I can make you wish you were dead. ❜

❛ I am not the only one that wants to see you dead. ❜

❛ Ugh! It really warms the heart. ❜

❛ You don't have a heart. ❜

❛ Be sure to tell the vengeance-seekers I said hi. ❜

❛ That's why I saved you from the spell you were under. ❜

❛ Wherever you are, a coven there shall be. ❜

❛ I feel really optimistic about this. ❜

❛ So you're a bit of a kook. Every witch has their process. ❜

❛ Witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, and steal children, and eat babies. ❜

❛ Don't you miss the glory days? ❜

❛ The path you're currently on leads nowhere. ❜

❛ Hey! Where do you keep your jade eggs? I'm fresh out of marbles, and my pelvic floor is all over the place. ❜

❛ I haven't seen you since I made a really pointed effort to never run into you again.❜

❛ Historically, we as a group don't do well in courtrooms. ❜

❛ People like you are dangerous. ❜

❛ Are there any real witches in the house? ❜

❛ What a team of rejects. ❜

❛ This is just a really, really, really horrible party. ❜

❛ It's giving "middle-aged second chance at love" vibes and I'm here for it. ❜

❛ Okay, so a witch is really just another name for a bad girl, is that right? ❜

❛ I'm not saying that I wanna join the club or anything, but I would drink the blood of a virgin if it would smooth out some of these wrinkles. ❜

❛ So the hallucinations seem chill. ❜

❛ I can't protect you! ❜

❛ I do not wanna die here. This is not where I die. ❜

❛ They can take your power, but they can't take your knowledge. ❜

❛ I didn't think you had it in you. ❜

❛ We were supposed to look out for each other, but we didn't. That was our fatal mistake. ❜

❛ I wish we could go home. ❜

❛ People can't be replaced. ❜

❛ Are we in trouble? Like, more than we were ten minutes ago? ❜

❛ Honestly, I don't know how to feel. Do I hate her? Or do I want her phone number? ❜

❛ I'm feeling impatient. I'm feeling like I wanna cause some damage. ❜

❛ Once vengeance is loosed, you can't reel it back in. ❜

❛ The only way to end a curse is to face it. ❜

❛ Sad is better than angry. ❜

❛ You don't have to know a person's name to know who they are. ❜

❛ Are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker? ❜

❛ The moral of the story, kids, is always finish what you started. Also, mercy is overrated. ❜

❛ Who better to commune with the dead than someone who's put so many in the grave? ❜

❛ I mean, or we could just slit her throat. ❜

❛ But we were getting along, weren't we? We were clicking. There was unity. ❜

❛ She's possessed! For real this time! ❜

❛ I hate ghosts. ❜

❛ Why do you hate me still?❜

❛ You were born evil. ❜

❛ Please take me with you. ❜

❛ She was protecting you. But you don't deserve it. ❜

❛ I couldn't... I couldn't control it. ❜

❛ Death comes for us all. ❜

❛ You're so much like your mother. ❜

❛ We love you more than we could ever hope to communicate in human words. ❜

❛ You don't need to be a psychic to see that you're a good egg. ❜

❛ Enjoy the now, baby. It's the only thing that's certain. ❜

❛ Nothing in my life has felt normal until I met you. ❜

❛ I want you to know the real me. ❜

❛ You're so adorably trusting. ❜

❛ Word to the wise, don't go sniffing around there. ❜

❛ You seriously don't know what kind of crazy that lady eats for breakfast. ❜

❛ I panicked, so I ran. ❜

❛ Could we, like, maybe not, with the physical violence? ❜

❛ Power doesn't interest me. ❜

❛ Yeah. Well, what you did was ehhh … but life goes on. Yours, anyway. ❜

❛ I mean, I've killed...uh...my share. But you don't see it holding me back. ❜

❛ Don't you dare feel guilty about your talent. You survived. ❜

❛ So you broke the rules. Big deal. That's what kept you alive. That's what makes you special. ❜

❛ I don't need you anymore. I don't know if I ever did. ❜

❛ If you really wanna finish this together, just know that I do not trust you. At all. ❜

❛ You'll get a nosebleed trying that hard to read my mind. ❜

❛ Hey, you want straight answers, ask a straight lady. ❜

❛ Tell me what more I should see, when I look at you. ❜

❛ You know, we really hated each other from the beginning. But now...I love you, guys. ❜

❛ I'm a forgotten woman. ❜

❛ Death comes for us all. It is what we all have in common. ❜

❛ I can see all the pieces falling into place. The gaps are filling in. ❜

❛ I'm telling you now because soon I'm not going to remember any of this. ❜

❛ I hope you'll join me. ❜

❛ I needed you. My coven. ❜

❛ What can I say? I like the bad boys. ❜

❛ I loved being a witch. ❜

❛ That's it? That's all the... That's all the time I get? ❜

❛ This can't be the end. It has to be the beginning. ❜

❛ I watch you. Just as closely as you watch everyone else. ❜

❛ No one in history has had special treatment like you. ❜

❛ You gave me nothing. You took. ❜

❛ Why do you let them believe those things about you, hmm? ❜

❛ What fresh horrors await us! ❜

❛ You seem relaxed. Usually at this point you're either complaining loudly or freaking out loudly. ❜

❛ It's nice. That feeling when your body knows it's safe. ❜

❛ Sometimes...boys die. ❜

❛ Congratulations, my love! I'm sorry I didn't have a ribbon for you to run through. ❜

❛ Why don't you want me? ❜

❛ Power looks good on you. ❜

❛ You do this and I will hate you forever. ❜

❛ Please let him live. Please, my love! ❜

❛ If you want to survive, get used to this feeling. ❜

❛ I cannot protect you from what's coming. ❜

❛ I saw you die. ❜

❛ And now, I'm a ghost. Can you dig it? ❜

❛ By the way, I did not sacrifice myself for you. I took a calculated risk. ❜

❛ You're making fun of me. This is just one of your tricks. ❜

❛ You have something of mine. I know you took it. ❜

❛ Why are you still here? Why won't you just die? ❜

❛ I'm sure he would forgive you for... whatever you did. ❜

❛ We could make a good team. You and me. ❜

[literaryvein-reblogs]

How do you write a positive character slowly being more and more pessimistic? Example: Character is a sunshine at the beginning of the series but after something happened, they became less and less positive. How does the process look like?

Writing Notes: Negative Character Arc

Character Arc - the path a character takes over the course of a story.

A character’s arc involves adversity and challenges, as well as some changes to the character, and ultimately leads to resolution.

Character arcs generally progress in tandem with traditional three-act story structure.

Most protagonist character arcs start with the inciting incident that sets up the stakes and central conflict facing this character.

The way the arc progresses from there depends on what sort of story you are telling and how the character functions.

Negative Change Arc: As the name implies, a negative change arc involves a character starting out as good or benevolent and descending into evil or ill fortune over the course of a story.

Some Related Tropes

Face–Heel Turn: A good guy turns bad.

Fallen Hero: Not all villains are born. Some are made, and none are more tragic than this trope. As the name implies, the Fallen Hero used to be a hero before turning bad. They may even have been an Ideal Hero or another equally optimistic archetype, up until the moment when they suffered something bad enough for them to lose all faith in good and idealism, be it the loss of a loved one, too many good deeds coming back to bite them hard, betrayal by someone they trusted the most, too much distrust from those who should have been allies, or some other faith-shattering event. It might even be a drawn out process of seduction to The Dark Side or fall from grace. What they choose to do about it determines what they become:

If they retreat into themselves and fight evil mercilessly to dull the pain, they become an Anti-Hero, though if this fight is motivated by vengeance, they may run the risk of becoming like the very monsters they have sworn to destroy.

If the loss of faith with humanity and/or society and government makes them decide to do something drastic to "fix" it, they become an Anti-Villain, most commonly a Knight Templar or Dark Messiah.

Alternately, if they just jump off the slippery slope and embrace chaos and the destruction of humanity as the only solution to their pain, they'll become a straight up cackling Card-Carrying Villain. Especially those who only became a hero for fame and glory, rather than for any good cause.

Or they'll be a fusion of the second and third examples and decide that killing/destroying everything is the ONLY way to save EVERYONE from the pain/pointlessness of existence, often becoming a Straw Nihilist and an Omnicidal Maniac.

They might withdraw from society, become a hermit or drunkard, and ignore the ongoing state of the world. If the current generation of heroes meets them, the fallen hero will mock how their deeds are useless. Most likely, however, they will help the new heroes in the hopes that they won't suffer the same fate.

Or they can ditch all of their once good qualities and become a Complete Monster.

The Tragic Hero: A longstanding literary concept, a character with a Fatal Flaw (like Pride, for example) who is doomed to fail in search of a Tragic Dream despite their best efforts and good intentions. This trope can work as a protagonist or an antagonist. As an antagonist, their goals are opposed to the protagonist's, but the audience still feels sympathetic towards them.

The Protagonist's Journey to Villain: A plot in which the protagonist, who starts out well-intentioned, turns into a monster.

Used to Be a Sweet Kid: This applies when a villain or other dark and troubled/troubling character was not so as a child.

Examples

The Shining. It starts off with Jack being a happy family man, albeit with a dark past, until the influence of the hotel drives him to madness and monstrosity.

The Lorax (2012): A good portion of the movie sees the Once-ler telling Ted his backstory, how he went from a kind-hearted, free-spirited inventor to a Corrupt Corporate Executive character trope who causes the extinction of trees due to his greed. However, the Once-ler in the present day really regrets his actions and sincerly helps Ted to restore the trees.

The title character in Carrie (1974, and its film adaptations) is a kind-hearted, but socially outcast teenage girl who spends the first half of the book getting slowly beaten down and pushed to her Rage Breaking Point by her classmates, the school faculty, and even her own mother. The second half is about the massacre she commits as a result when what happens at the Senior Prom makes her snap.

Alexandre Cabanel's The Fallen Angel: Lucifer, once God's brightest angel, lies defeated and resentful after his jealousy toward human beings and power-hungry tendencies drove him to fight (and lose) a war against Heaven.

Arguably the central plot of Breaking Bad, which follows the journey of Walter White across five seasons from sympathetic, kindhearted chemistry teacher and family man suffering from cancer to a fairly loathsome Villain Protagonist. Gets briefly paused halfway through the fifth season when Walt, having reached the top of his empire, having taken his operation global realizes that he has made more money than he could ever hope to spend and far more than he even set out for initially. This leads him to decide he is out of the game, make amends with his former business partner by giving him the money he's owed and try to start over fresh with his family. Then his DEA agent brother-in-law finally figures out he's a drug dealer, causing him to slip back into his criminal ways and his moral degradation resumes. Even if he won't physically harm them, he's perfectly willing to throw his family under the bus to save his own skin like making a false confession tape implicating Hank or in Jesse's case, teaming up with skinheads to have him killed when he becomes too much of a hassle.

The Favourite (2018): Arguably the case for Abigail. She starts out a kind-natured Fallen Princess after her father gambled away both the entire family fortune and herself, so she sets out to join her cousin Sarah at Queen Anne's court in hopes of getting it back. However, as she is sucked into the world of politics and abused consistently by everyone around her, Abigail adapts to their cruel, underhanded ways alarmingly quickly, playing nice around Queen Anne as an antidote to Sarah's personality, faking tears when people push her too far, drugging Sarah's tea, seducing a Lord, marrying him and then all but dumping him once she gets her title back. Her cruelty finally culminates in getting Sarah officially banished from Court and intercepting her letters to the Queen, leaving Anne heartbroken, blatantly cheating on her husband in front of him, and finally stomping on one of Queen Anne's beloved pet bunnies (whom she views as surrogate children) until she nearly kills it. Queen Anne is not amused.

Les Misérables: Inspector Javert is on the side of good and law, but he is so inflated with extreme self-righteousness that, when confronted with Valjean's nobility, he has no choice but to kill himself.

In The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Archdeacon Claude Frollo is a compassionate man in the beginning, but after seeing Esmerelda, he goes mad with lust and slowly becomes evil, desiring to either have her for his own or kill her if she won't become his.

The Percy Jackson and the Olympians short story "The Diary of Luke Castellan" shows this off with the titular Luke, a villain-turned-hero who used to be a very sweet kid. Or, as in this chapter of history, a sweet teenager. He's brave, protective, and caring towards his little adopted family, to the point that he closely resembles the later hero of the series, Percy.

In The Witcher as seen by the flashbacks to his childhood with his "Ma" Visenna in the finale episode of Season 1, Geralt was once an adorable little Momma's Boy full of optimism. Completely unlike The Stoic Deadpan Snarker Knight in Sour Armor character trope he is in the present.

Sources: 1 2 3 4 5 ⚜ More: References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

There are so many possible causes as well as directions you can take your story in with this idea. Choose which of these tropes you would like to incorporate into your writing, and also found some examples for inspiration. More information and examples in the links above, hope this helps!

[romeraffys]

it's so optimistic of alan to be worried about dying of a supposedly unhealthy body and not due to the fact that he's constantly surrounded by at least 5 former kids of a sociopathic millionaire that has tried to kill all of them on multiple occasions and is now conducting fatal experiments on their ilk

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

Chan’s ideal type

(Skz Ideal Type series pt. 1: Appearance, personality, misc.)

He may like dark brown/black hair, brown eyes, maybe olive, brown, or black skin. Regardless of gender he likes his partners to be fit with a little bit of muscle to them. Well-maintained.

He’d prefer someone who isn’t short OR tall. Maybe somewhere in the middle. Very lean. Maybe eyes that have sparkles of other colors in them—That’s very pretty to him—Ans he wouldn’t mind someone with dyed hair? As long as it’s a more natural color, like brown, blonde, or red.

Likes longer limbs. Someone who dresses very boldly in very bold colors. Someone who doesn’t show too much skin, probably with longer more flowing hair. Probably someone elegant-looking.

He definitely thinks the eyes are very very pretty, and has a lot of focus on his partner’s eyes. Likes someone who shows personality in their appearance, and almost seems divine/magical. Like that goddess energy.

Someone who has a long vertical line and impeccable posture. May like people who’re a bit taller than him?? Not sure. Definitely getting he may prefer tanner/browner skin here.

Again, someone with good posture. Someone with strength to their appearance, who dresses in a way that, while still shows their personality, isn’t too gaudy or out there.

May like people who are foreign. So, not (mainland) Korean. (Possibly not Aussie). Someone who’s intelligent and can broaden his horizons, as well as understands him.

Likes someone who he can truly feel close to, like they’re family. Someone who is responsible and organized, who has that kind of domestic energy. Someone who he would want to start a family with/introduce to and assimilate to his own. Someone who can get along well with his parents and siblings and close friends.

He likes someone who has a deeper vibe. Someone who feels deeply and is capable of very deep connections. Who can bring out all sides of him and nurture them, and kind of accept him as he is, as a whole. Someone who’s free and adventurous, and likes to travel and go places.

Likes someone who doesn’t cause arguments or disagreements too much. Someone who can be his peace. His safe haven. Someone who’s harmonious and doesn’t judge him, and more light and airy.

Someone who will accept the hidden parts of him, and kind of…Be able to handle his emotions? I’m getting that he’s never really been able to be entirely emotionally vulnerable. And he wants someone who can finally be that safe space.

Doesn’t like people who are too dreamy or delusional. Probably doesn’t like people too much in the public eye, or who would damage his public image. But he also loves people who’re like that? It’s odd. He likes it at first, but on a deeper level, it starts grating on his nerves very quickly.

He likes that sexier femme fatale man eater energy outwardly. Like, when he thinks ‘Oh, this person will ruin me’ in the best way possible. Then they turn out to be very sweet and kind and loving and nurturing. That type of thing

He likes someone who’s compassionate and optimistic. Someone who is very lucky and can trust in and rely on him. Someone who will be there for him, stabilizing him. Who makes him happy and feel like he’s almost dreaming. Like, this is so good this has to be a dream. Someone who’s like walking paradise.

He likes someone who’s like his other half. So similar, yet opposites. The perfect compliments. With the same ideals and similar mental states, but different vibes and personalities. He likes that kind of energy.

Someone who would want kids. Because Chan wants to have his own someday.

Someone he can almost…Merge with? I guess?

Someone who’s patient and can persevere through hard times. Someone who won’t cause him ruin and loss. Someone who isn’t just after money and fame, and genuinely wants him for him. Someone who doesn’t fear failure but learns from it.

He doesn't like people who are TOO similar to those he's already close to, or share too many flaws with them. He doesn't want to deal with that x2, and it'll probably give him the ick if he can't stop seeing them in you.

Tl;DR/Summary:

Physical Appearance:

Dark brown/black hair (or naturally dyed brown, blonde, or red)

Brown eyes, possibly with sparkles of other colors

Olive, brown, or black skin (prefers tanner/browner skin)

Fit with a little bit of muscle, very lean

Medium height (neither short nor tall), possibly a bit taller than him

Longer limbs

Well-maintained appearance

Impeccable posture and a long vertical line

Elegant-looking, almost divine/magical "goddess energy"

Strength to their appearance

Style:

Dresses boldly in bold colors, but not too gaudy or "out there"

Doesn't show too much skin

Longer, flowing hair

Shows personality in their appearance

Personality & Character:

Intelligent and able to broaden his horizons

Understands him deeply

Can feel truly close to, like family

Responsible and organized ("domestic energy")

Wants to start a family and have kids

Gets along well with his parents, siblings, and close friends

Deeper vibe, feels deeply, capable of very deep connections

Brings out all sides of him and nurtures them, accepts him as a whole

Free, adventurous, likes to travel

Doesn't cause arguments; his peace and safe haven

Harmonious, non-judgmental, light and airy

Accepts his hidden parts and can handle his emotions (a safe space for emotional vulnerability)

Compassionate and optimistic

Lucky, trustworthy, stable

His "other half" – similar ideals and mental states, but different vibes and personalities; the perfect compliment

Patient and perseverant through hard times

Not after money and fame; genuinely wants him for him

Doesn't fear failure but learns from it

Outwardly has a "sexier femme fatale/man eater" energy but is secretly sweet, kind, loving, and nurturing.

Preferences/Dislikes:

May like people who are foreign (not mainland Korean, possibly not Aussie)

Dislikes people who are too dreamy or delusional (though he initially likes this energy, it quickly becomes grating)

Generally dislikes people too much in the public eye or who would damage his public image

Doesn't like people too similar to his close circle or who share too many flaws with them.

Astrological placements he'll probably like/dislike

Likely to Like:

Earth Dominant (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn placements): Aligns with his preference for responsibility, organization, domestic energy, and stability.

Water Dominant (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces placements): Supports his desire for deep emotional connections, empathy, and someone who feels deeply and can be a safe emotional space.1

Sagittarius Placements (Sun, Moon, Ascendant): Resonates with his liking for adventurous, free-spirited individuals who enjoy travel and can broaden his horizons.

Libra Placements (Sun, Moon, Ascendant): Aligns with his desire for harmony, peace, and someone who avoids conflict.

Capricorn Rising/Strong Saturn aspects: Indicates good posture, a sense of strength in appearance, and a responsible nature.

Scorpio Placements (especially Moon/Venus): Matches his attraction to a "deeper vibe" and intense connections, as well as the "femme fatale" allure.

Aries/Leo Placements (for bold dressing): Can align with his preference for bold fashion and showing personality through appearance.

Strong Venus aspects (especially Venus in Earth/Water signs): Suggests someone loving, nurturing, and compassionate.

Jupiter aspects (especially trines/sextiles): Indicates optimism, luck, and someone who can make him feel "like dreaming."

North Node in Earth/Water signs: Suggests growth towards stability, emotional depth, and family values.

Likely to Dislike:

Excessive Air Dominance (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius, especially if ungrounded): Could be perceived as too "airy" or lacking the deep emotional grounding he wants, potentially leading to superficiality or a lack of emotional vulnerability.

Fire Dominant (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius, if overly confrontational or attention-seeking): Could clash with his desire for peace, harmony, and someone who isn't "too much in the public eye" or causes arguments.

Heavy Pisces/Neptune aspects (if prone to delusion): Could lead to the "too dreamy or delusional" quality he dislikes.

Challenging aspects to Saturn (e.g., Saturn-Mars square): May indicate a lack of discipline or responsibility, contrasting with his preference for organized and responsible partners.

Prominent Uranus placements (if unstable or unpredictable): Could be perceived as too erratic or disruptive to his desire for a stable "safe haven."

Strong Mars aspects (if overly aggressive or argumentative): Contradicts his desire for peace and someone who doesn't cause arguments.