#for the most part i dont check the blogs of new followers

[kidfur]

Still debating if i should make my blog chrono adult to follow.. i dont rember if any of my mutuals are chrono minors but considering itd be more for a comfort thing rather than a content rule thing (mostly? but i mean i still reblog mildly suggestive stuff sometimes regardless) so i could just say current mutuals are ok

[peachigummi]

test my luck ꢾ꣒ mattheo riddle.

summary: enemy to lovers! Mattheo and y/n have been each other's biggest haters since year 1, they're in their final year at Hogwarts. Mattheo finally pushes y/n to the edge, with his venomous words and guilt tactics.

pairing: enemy! mattheo x fem ravenclaw! reader

warnings: not for the faint of heart! mature themes/language. mentions of abuse. slow burn? bullying angst!! oh my god angst, but ends with some bittersweet fluff I promise! attempted suicide sorry (after reading this back, i dont mean it to be manipulation or to glorify or romanticize but! shit!! for a plot?)

note: i haven't written anything in literal years, the pov is going to shift a lot so bear with me. i honestly just lost any sense of motivation. but something in me just bloomed. you wont see any hp things on this blog it is my journal and i feel like sharing! maybe a part 2 in the making. if this gets enough response.

word count: 6,828

(slightly not really proofread or fan fact checked? if that's a thing ha)

playlist: should i create..? you know damn well the smiths would be in it! like Bigmouth Strikes Again?? that is mattheo!

reblogs & comments are so appreciated! i hope you enjoy <3

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

It was the start of your last year of Hogwarts, it was an okay time. You personally didn’t get into too much trouble, you liked to stick by yourself for the most part. You studied hard because your muggle parents were still confused about you being a witch, and what you would get out of it. It was hard to process that information, it was a thing of fairy tales. You had to prove yourself in this new world. That…that was hard when you were constantly looking over your shoulder for Mattheo Riddle.

“What’s a whore doing in my seat?” Speak of the damn devil. 

You turned to look at him with a sarcastic smile, “Well hello to you too Mattheo.” You nod at the three other boys that were with him, each of their arms crossed. “Draco. Blaise. Theodore.” You return to look at Mattheo, “you know last time I checked… there are no assigned seats in Potions.” You looked around and the class was still fairly empty.

“Think again and think hard.” Mattheo spoke to you in a cold shallow tone, he barely looked at you. He circled around the table you were at, your eyes following him. He suddenly stopped right behind your chair, yanking it back. There was a loud scrape, the few students that were in the room turned to look at the scene unfolding. You didn’t meet any of their eyes. Mattheo slammed his hand on the side of the table, making you flinch. You hated that you reacted that way. He grabbed the back of your ponytail, forcing your head forward where his hand was, “Look.” M. Riddle. D. Malfoy. B. Zabini. T. Nott. Their names were carved into the side. You grabbed Mattheo’s hand, the one that was still holding onto your ponytail, you tried to pry his icy cold fingers off. It only made him tighten his grip, he bent down to get close to your face, “I suggest you move unless you want me to carve my name onto your face as well.” he spat and finally let go. 

“Whatever,” you gathered your books, “this seat sucks anyways. I’ll go hang out with Professor Snape up front.” You rolled your eyes as Draco lit up a cigarette, handing the pack to the boys to share. If you’re going to try and get away with smoking, yeah do it in the back of the class I guess.

“You really like being a teacher’s pet don’t you? That’s why you’ve always got your nose up Snape’s ass.” 

“Seriously fuck off! Go continue to lose brain cells with your sorry excuse of friends.” You push the seat back and let it topple over. You mentally slapped yourself, you shouldn’t be feeding into his remarks.

“That’s cute sunshine, I’ll bet you have a hard time standing up for yourself in every aspect of your pathetic life. Do better.” Mattheo smugly said, smoking the cigarette that was in his hand.

You opened your mouth to speak but decided against it, you ended up just flipping him off. He did the same, giving you an annoyed look. You took the seat next to Hermione in the front of the class. Ugh! That Mattheo. “Are you okay?!” She asked, shooting daggers at the group, turning to you again “How can you put up with that? We have to tell someone..” you shook my head and whispered, “it’ll only make things worse. I don’t want to be a snitch. It’s already been six years anyways… how can one more year really change things.”

Blaise laughed, “you like that don’t you mattheo? Isn’t she so cute when she’s angry, you like feisty girls, yeah?”

Draco chuckles, “oh he definitely does, too bad she’s a stupid bitch.” The group laughs together.

You could hear them hollering from the back. You tried to calm yourself down and pay attention to the different measurements of the potions you were being taught. Maybe I could switch this class to a different time. You thought, focusing back to the lesson when Professor Snape mentioned something about needing to be in groups of three for an upcoming project.

Before Snape could assign anyone, Mattheo spoke up, “Sir I’d like to work with Theodore, if that’s permitted.” Snape looked annoyed by his interjection but answered, “No, Theodore will be with Y/N and Draco. Nothing will change. I already made the groups, they will be posted near the storeroom.” He gave Mattheo a dirty look.

You could hear Draco scoff but he didn't say anything. Yet. He kept to himself and his buddies while they continued to smoke and do other things to piss Professor Snape off before the class was finally dismissed. I guess I didn’t need to worry about being in a pair with Mattheo. You still wanted to protest against the group choice, but nothing would come of it. You knew better than to go against Snape’s final word. Theodore wasn’t such a horrible person, he actually can be pretty smart and helpful, if you got him alone. Otherwise when he was with even just one of his buddies, he was just like them - a jerk. It was Draco you won’t be able to stand.

“Don't do anything stupid, Y/L/N, and we might actually do okay in this project.” That was Draco himself, walking over with Theodore.

You ignored his comment, “where should we meet and when?”

“We can use one of the abandoned classrooms. Before the lunch break?” Theodore suggested, handing a note with directions.

“Okay. See you.” You said as bluntly as possible, gathering your book. You went to grab the ingredients your group might need. 

“Teachers pet!” Draco yelled after.

⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

Of course you were the first to the abandoned classroom, you had been waiting for nearly twenty minutes before either of them showed. When they did, they didn’t bother to apologize, though you didn’t expect them to. Even with smart comments from both boys, you finished discussing the project and the presentation at a decent hour. It was quiet as you started to collect your things, Draco excused himself earlier to collect a package.

“Y/N, why is it that you hate Mattheo so much?” Theodore broke the silence, carefully watching you wrap the vials carefully. You paused, taken back. “He’s been trying to get a rise out of you since day 1, why?” He continued nonchalantly, leaning back in his chair. He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket.

You quickly grab them out of his hand and put it in your own breast pocket, “don’t smoke around me.” 

This made him annoyed, “Hey! I need those! They keep me calm!” 

“No you don't, you've been fine this entire time without them. I’m not trying to raise your blood pressure right now. You’re fine.” You give him a good look, maybe he was playing dumb. How could he not know? Theodore and Mattheo were best friends; they must have already talked about this, “I only hate Mattheo because he hates me. It’s all there's to it…” I think.

He lingers for a moment after you answered him, there is something else you haven’t said, “tell me what you think. There’s always some deeper reason for this sort of stuff” He rested his chin on his hand. See this is why I favored Theodore from the rest of his group, but should I still trust him? He could use this information against me. I took the chance.

“Over the years I suspected it was just plainly because I was a mudblood and not some perfect pure-bred like you folk.” You continued to wrap the vials carefully. 

Theodore rolled his eyes, “He does have a thing against people with different backgrounds than his own. He thinks everyone in this school should be from a wizarding family. But that’s not the case with you.” He grabbed a vial too, helping me wrap them, “He’s never said anything about your parents or how they’re muggles.” Mattheo would talk about me when I wasn’t around? Why would he do that? You looked into his eyes searching for some joke or underlying lie. There was none I could detect.

You recall the moment aloud when you first laid your eyes on Mattheo, “It was at the train station. Our first year. I remember hugging and kissing my parents goodbye, not wanting to let go of them. I turned around to go on the train and there was a much much smaller Mattheo staring at me with wide beady little eyes that were glossed over with tears. He was cute in that split second - ” You couldn’t help but smile at the memory. Theodore watched you carefully. You straightened your lips, continuing, “ - before he stuck a solid wad of gum in my hair.”

Theodore bellowed, nearly falling backwards in his chair, “Yeah that sounds like him, that’s a classic stunt he’d pull off. There was this one time in year 5 when he stuck gum on the chair of one of the professors before class…I never saw her so mad after she sat down and got up, her chair nearly followed her around!” He tried to settle himself down, “Mattheo always had a thing for doing stuff to people and acting as if it’s all a joke.”

“It’s not a joke when you have to cut your hair super short in order to remove the gum. I felt so naked without my long hair, it was so beautiful! And he made it worse when he made a point to show how ugly I was to everyone in the Great Hall. I even remember you laughing just like you are now.” You pushed his shoulder.

Theodore smirked, “yeah we all laughed, how couldn’t we?! You looked ridiculous before you grew it back out. We used to call you Baldy McEgg-head. You’d get so mad, only making us laugh harder.” At least someone cherished the memory. You rolled your eyes.

It grew quiet again, “have you ever met Mattheo’s parents? Has he ever talked to you about them?”

“No. I’ve never met them. He’s never really talked about his parents or his life outside Hogwarts. I don’t think he’s on great terms with his dad. He always stayed with them during the breaks, and wasn't ever allowed to spend it with us or here at hogwarts. He missed out on a lot of important hang outs. I wished he was there for them” Theodore explained, he sounded disappointed and angry.

“Do…do you think he’s jealous of my home life? The affection I was receiving in front of him at the train station…” 

He thinks for a moment, “I suppose it could be a possibility…hard to tell. He doesn’t allow himself to show too much emotion, again, probably has to do with the way he must have been raised.”

You wanted to do more research into Mattheo’s family…but how? “Thanks for this Teddy. You’ve given me a lot to think about.” You finished packing everything into your bag. Before you left you tossed him back his pack of cigarettes, “see you later.”

⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

You let out a sigh of relief, to be alone once again. Mettheo Riddle, what secrets do you hide? You made your way to the library instead of the Great Hall. After a few hours of searching around the library, you finally find a section of massive thick old leather bound books. You blew on the covers, these books contained a record of all the wizards and witches that had attended Hogwarts. Kind of like a yearbook, but it told you what came of them. Who married who, what did they end up doing after Hogwarts, etc. a rare but quite the gem of a find. “R… R.. R” you whispered, touching the book ends. You look at the bottom of the bookshelf finding the one that contained the last names that began with R. You found it, and you began to look through for the name “Riddle.”

Just as you got to the last name, you felt a wave of shame. You were snooping into somebody’s life. Their history. This is wrong. If Mattheo wanted to talk about his home life, surely he would have. He was hiding something. There were heavy slow footsteps coming around the corner of the aisle. You snapped the book shut holding it behind you and you looked at the section opposite of where you just were. Mattheo, they were his steps, you could tell. 

“Of course you’d be in the library doing nerd stuff.” He doesn’t sound happy, but also when is he truly ever?

You looked at him then around yourself, “who me? A nerd for being in the library?” I mean he wasn’t wrong but ..yeah. You still point at him, “Where are you then? Because it seems to be you’re also in the library with…” you fake gasp, “...Me! Making you a nerd too!” You hoped that confused him, you shifted the leather book behind your back. It was getting heavy by the second.

“I’m ditching classes to smoke,” He takes a rip of a cigarette that was nearly at its end, he blows the smoke in your face. “Nerd.”

“Whoop-dee-doo what a stellar insult Mettheo. I’m a ravenclaw. What did you expect? I’d rather be a nerd than a-” You took a step closer to him squinting then widening your eyes in horror, “oh my god Mattheo did you lose a tooth from all that smoking?” He quickly shoved his pinky into his mouth feeling his teeth in a panic. If there was one thing he cared more about than cigarettes it was keeping up with his good looks. Uh did I just describe him as good looking?

He actually laughed once he finished counting his teeth, “They’re perfectly fine. I care about taking care of myself, unlike you. How often do you wash yourself? I doubt you even brush your hair. I did you a favor when you had to cut it off. You have no sense of style, even with a selection of uniforms! Why do you dress like it’s winter all year? You dress like a peasant from the 1820’s”

Okay ouch, that kinda hurt. You’ve been insecure with your body, you always struggled with that. Dressing in sweaters helped hide it. You didn’t know how to respond, maybe he's right. You couldn’t stand up for yourself to save your life. You just shoved his shoulder with your own and walked past him. 

Matthew continues to follow you, “did you just shove me you twat?” He snatched the book out of my arms holding it a ways away from you, “If you’re going to do sneaky shit, don’t do it so obviously. Is this a diary or something?” Your eyes widened trying to take it back, but he held it up high above his head easily with one hand.

“Yes! It’s my diary, it’s where I gush about the god almighty perfect Mattheo!” I sarcastically said, still hoping he wouldn’t look at the title of the book. “No stupid! I dont have one, I just got done working on the potions project with your buddies. Hand me back the book.”

“Oh I bet you three had lots of fun. Did you talk about me while you were there? Did you talk about how you can’t take your eyes and mind off of me? You’re clearly obsessed, following me around like a love sick puppy. You pop up wherever I happen to be.” 

“Ew no never.” You fought your expression back, did Theodore tell him something? Fuck. “Draco left, it was just Teddy and I. we spent it kissing the whole time. Super carefree. His lips surprisingly didn't taste like cigarettes, they were pretty sweet.”

Mattheo’s smug smirk fades even before you finish your sentence. He hated how you used a nickname for his friend. He despised the thought of you kissing anyone, especially his mates, “fucking liar. THEODORE, not TEDDY, doesn’t like you. He just tolerates you because he has to. He wouldn’t be caught dead kissing you. You’re disgusting and I pity anyone who has the displeasure of touching you in any way other than to harm you. 

You hold your hands up, “woah woah woah, whatever makes you sleep peacefully at night. Why else did Teddy take me to an abandoned classroom, it was our chance to get away together especially after Draco conveniently left.” You couldn’t believe you were lying through your teeth, this would forsure come back and bite you in the ass even harder. You haven’t even had your first kiss yet. You haven't even been romantically linked with anyone before. 

“Stop fucking calling him Teddy, it’s Theodore!”

“Can you guys get a room or SHUT UP! For Merlin’s Sake” A random student yelled out at us. Slamming their hand on the table. You were embarrassed because you took pride in keeping the library a sacred place to study or relax.

“Piss off. Go find a room of your own instead of listening to us talking. You must be a first year, if you’re still so sensitive to other’s voices in the library.” He continued to raise his voice, “We’ve been like this for years! Blah blah blah!!”

“Stop it Mattheo.” You shove him again, mouthing to the student, I'm very sorry. With the distraction you go and grab the book in Mattheo’s hand but he quickly readjusts his grip.

“You don’t have to apologize for me, sunshine. You should apologize to him for your existence, do everyone a favor will you?” He finally looked down at the title of the book, Who Were They and Where They Now?: Hogwarts. He carefully used a single finger to pry it open to where the fabric bookmark was, immediately seeing his own surname. He gives a manic laugh looking up at your face and slamming the book down to the floor, “you stalker. You are obsessed with me.” 

He lunged at you. You took a step back, you hit the shelving. Your heart was beating so fast you thought you would pass out from the red handed guilt. 

“What kind of information were you looking to find huh?” He pointed a finger at me, his eyes ice cold. Looking to murder. Your head suddenly hurt, there was a high pitched ringing that wouldn't stop. You went to cover your ears to find some relief but Mattheo grabbed you and shook hard, “what the FUCK did you think you would find? Tell me. Tell me NOW!” You didn’t know what to say he just stared hard at you, his nails digging into your arms. You winced. He began to speak fast and harshly as if he knew, as if you had said something. 

“Did you really expect you would find out that I had a happy home? Do you think I’m happy being born in some dingy hovel? Do you think I'm overjoyed to be related to and be abused by my father? He beat me black and blue and hated my existence. My mother just sat there silently watching. She doesn’t care. Would YOU be thrilled knowing that you came from a long line of dark wizards who’ve caused pain and suffering to people for centuries.” 

You began to cry, “Mattheo..”

“You honestly think I would be so proud of that to tell everyone?” He scoffed.

“Mattheo you’re hurting me…”

“I. Don’t. Care.” His deep brown eyes didn’t leave yours, “you should have minded your own business. Stupid girl prying into my history. What do you care? Did you think I'd be less of a jerk to you if I had a perfect loving family like yours? ”

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry! I .. I.”

“Shut up. You don't get to speak. I don't need you feeling sorry for me, I can handle myself. This is probably the worst you’ll ever experience.”

“Y-You’re right. I’m.. I’m grateful I never had to e-endure that” You were one stuttering mess. 

He moves one hand to cup your mouth to shut you up again, “what did i say. I don't want to hear another word out of your mouth.” He rose the other up threateningly. 

You closed your eyes. Do it Mattheo. Please. I deserve it. I’m sorry I tried to pry. Do it. He was surprised by your offer and looked at you in confusion, his expression didn’t change though. “What kind of sick request is that?” You open your eyes again to meet his. Both of you were in disbelief, did he just-? “Why would you want me to beat you? Because you feel bad for me? I don’t want nor need your sympathy. Trying to act like a saint that's willing to be my punching bag whenever I want.” he scoffed, letting your mouth free, taking a single step back away from you.

“Then why are you so mean to me? Tell me that. When I first laid eyes on you during our first year at the train platform, I thought we would be friends.” You wrapped your arms around yourself, rubbing where his fingers had dug into you.

“You’re a prissy annoying know-it-all goody two shoes that thinks she’s better than everyone. You can’t help but chime in whenever you have the chance and show off.”

“So it’s just my existence then huh, nothing else to it?” You felt your own anger finally rise, you wiped your tears off your cheek trying to regain composure.

“Pretty much. You’re unbearable. You are the most unexciting thing I’ve ever encountered.”

“Let me fix that for you.” Your eyes betrayed you and let the gates open, the flood starting to spill once more. Before Mattheo could get another hold of you you quickly shuffled off, dropping your things. Already feeling limp. Just hoping your legs would carry you a bit more.

Mattheo rolls his eyes, “tsk so stupid.” He stood there staring at the place you once were. Thinking about what occurred when he processed what you said, “Y/N! Hey I-..” He began to follow in the direction you went off to.

Your shuffle turned into a run, you just needed privacy. Anything. Your dorm was too far away, so you went into the nearest girls bathroom and into the furthest stall to sob.

Mattheo reaches the hallway, looking to his left and right. Fuck where did she go? He closes his eyes to listen closely. He heard something faint and went with his gut.

You sat down beside the toilet, hitting your head with your fist. “Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.” You heard a familiar giggle, “go away Myrtle. Now’s especially not the time.” 

Bathroom, you had to be in the bathroom. He went inside not caring if another girl would see him, “Y/N? You’re in here, I know you are. Look, just come out will you?” Instead Moaning Myrtle came forth.

“Are you looking for me?” she bit her finger looking him up and down, “we don't get that many cute boys in here.” She sighed, still admiring him, “Nevertheless, shame on you. How could someone as delicious as you treat someone so horribly.” She laughed in his face.

“Shut up. I don't need to be lectured by some depressed ghost. Why are you even here. Go away.” He went further inside the bathroom pushing doors in, “actually have you seen a girl come in, Y/N?”

“Yes!” She said excitedly pointing to the last stall, “She’s coming with me and we’ll get to haunt together. It’ll be so fun to not be alone anymore” She broke into another high pitched laugh, clapping her hands with joy. 

“What the hell is she on about?” That’s when he noticed broken glass from a mirror. His heart drops, “you’ve got to be kidding me…” He rushed over pushing the final door in, but this one wouldn’t budge. “Y/N. It’s Mattheo..” his heart drops and he pales when he notices blood start to seep out from under the door, you’ve hurt yourself. “Y/N!” He says again louder, “open the door! Open it right fucking now! Y/N!!”

You didn’t want him to see you like this, no one should have to see this. You try to hold the door closed but you were losing your strength to do anything. The blood made it slippery so your hand slid down, “M-m-mattheo haven’t..you said enough?”

Myrtle pointed to the glass, “look how eager she was! Damaging school property to break free” She did a couple spins in the air, “any minute now!”

“That’s it. I’ve had enough.” Mattheo raised his wand and shot a blast at the lock, it broke open and he flung the door open to reveal you laying on the floor. His heart seemed to stop completely. “Shit! Dammit! Y/N!” 

The blast frightened you, “No. Mattheo. No.” You could only make out his dark curly haired head. You tried to swat him away before losing consciousness due to blood loss. 

Professor Snape rushed in after hearing a blast, “what the bloody hell is going on in here, Mr. Riddle.”

Mattheo looked at him with an angry and panicked expression, “I need her in the infirmary right now.” He said through gritted teeth. He leans over you, grabbing a large bunch of toilet paper and quickly kneels next to you. Applying pressure on your bleeding left wrist.

Snape understood immediately, “Keep the pressure on the wrist, Riddle.” He was able to pick you up easily, but he was not enthusiastic about having your blood staining his robes, “with HASTE Riddle! Follow me!” And off they went to the infirmary. Once there Snape quickly laid you on a bed gently before Madame Pomfrey took over. 

She was able to stop and clean the bleeding, while she examined the cut striation she asked both Snape and Mattheo what blood type they were, “The girls lost too much blood, she needs a transfusion.” She began to stitch the wrist, the cut was near vertical to the veins. 

Mattheo in a less than a split second looked at Pomfrey, “Am I able to donate for her.” He didn’t say it as a question, he wanted it to be a command. 

“As long as you share the same blood type then yes, sweetheart. Please, fresh blood is much better. We can’t wait more time, Ms. Y/L/N is so terribly pale. She can have a seizure any minute if we dont get more blood to her brain” still carefully pulling at threads. His hand was still holding yours. 

He nods impatiently, less talking, more action. “I’m AB-” he gulped. One of the rarest blood types in the world, “what type is she?” he began to roll up his sleeve even before Pomfrey was able to respond.

“Goodheavens! Thank Merlin. She’s AB- as well!” She sighs looking up at the ceiling for a split second, calling for a nurse to help set up the transfusion. He took a seat on your left, watching the nurse insert a needle into each of your arms. He didn’t flinch, but he gave her a threatening look when she inserted a needle into your arm, thinking she would bring more pain to you. 

Madame Pomfrey stood up, finished. “If it was with a straight razor and not a glass shard, I don’t think i would have been able to-” she let her voice die down after seeing how pale Mattheo began to look too, she shut her mouth as to not worry him more with what the other alternative was. He couldn’t hide his guilt. His eyes were alternating between your face and his blood that was slowly running into your body through a single tubing. He desperately needed it to go faster. 

“Is there a chance she would wake up with problems with her veins or her nerves?” He asked.

Pomfrey patted the boy's shoulders, “Let’s hope not, let’s hope they hold. With the basics in place, there’s nothing a little magic can’t help.” This eased him, “Ms. Y/L/N wont wake for a couple of hours. She needs to be watched to make sure she doesn’t rip my stitching job or we will go back to square one my boy. Can I trust you?”

“Is that really a necessary question?” He bit his tongue, “Sorry, yes I will watch over her. I need to be here when she wakes up.”

“Best she gets a psychiatrist too, but that's a later issue to address. We’ll focus on physical healing for now.” Pomfrey looked at Mattheo curiously, isn’t this one of the trouble-making slytherin boys? She shook her head and walked out to attend to another student.

“Y/N i’m here.” He studies your face, deep with regret and guilt. He holds your right hand tightly, he whispers softly, “it’s okay, you’re going to be alright..”

“Riddle.” Snape was still watching everything from the shadows of the room, “What happened to my best student, why is he in this condition?”

“It’s my fault, Professor…I was making a fool out of myself. I was treating her like hell… it went too far. She must have had a breakdown and she-” he couldn’t bear to describe your condition out loud.

Snape held a hand up to silence him from saying more, “rather than giving you detention for the rest of your time here at Hogwarts. I will need you to attend all the girl’s classes she will be missing in her recovery. She must not fall behind.”

“Yes sir, I understand. I’ll do it.” 

Snape turned to leave but came back toward the boy and yanked the cigarette box from his uniform pocket, “none of these for you either, especially as you are sharing blood with Y/N. She never liked you smoking.” and off he turned around to change his own robes from the blood.

“Anything for you.” he whispered towards you, “please wake up soon.”

⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

You began to stir, your eyes fluttering open. You looked around in a panic. You were incredibly sore, especially your left wrist. It stung badly. Mattheo had fallen asleep in the chair when he jolted awake to the sound of your movements, “Calm down, relax, you’re in the infirmary. You’re safe.” He couldn’t help but feel like he just lied about it being safe, if he was the cause of this.

“M…m..Mattheo” You began to cry again, “I’m so sorry.” You went to reach out and hug him but flinched. You followed the red transfusion line to him, “oh Mattheo.”

He sat up to lean towards you. He shushes you and wipes your tears with the back of his hand, ‘you need to calm down and take it easy, princess. You’ve lost a lot of blood and you're still weak. This is just to bring your levels up, you’ll start to feel better soon.”

You stared at his beautiful eyes, ones that had held so much hate but there seemed to be no trace of it now. You felt guilty, I acted like a coward. “Myrtle said it was going to be quick and painless. I’m so stupid I couldn’t even do it right.” You felt another wave of tears coming but  you tried to choke them down.

“No youre not, you’re not at fault.” He couldn’t help but chuckle cautiously as what he was about to say, “you might be a know-it-all but you just need to have more control with your thoughts. Don’t listen to Moaning Myrtle. Don’t be hard on yourself, you're not stupid. You did nothing wrong.”

“I thought I was doing you a favor.” you were so exhausted. But you needed to get this out before you lost consciousness again. With your good arm you help his hand tightly, looking him in the eyes again to emphasize the point you were going to make, “Mattheo, I really am idiotic. I Am. I did think you had a perfect life, it didn’t cross my mind that you had it any other way. You were always carefree and just let's be honest, acting like you're’ better than everyone else. It was wrong of me to have assumed that.”

He frowns. “Don’t apologize. There’s no way to tell what someone is going through ultimately. I..cope in my own way.” He softly strokes your cheek with this thumb.

If it wasn’t for the pain, you would have thought you were asleep. Dead. Or in purgatory. A realm between realms. No way the mattheo I’ve known my whole life is sitting beside me looking..lovingly at me? You felt horrible. Did I just manipulate him into caring about me? Just hours ago he was mocking and saying nasty things as usual. 

Mattheo could see the look of disbelief in your eyes from the way he was behaving, “Y/N. I’m caring for you. No you’re not dreaming or in some other realm. You’re here, with me, thank Merlin. You didn’t manipulate me, you woke me up.”

You sat up too quickly for your own good, your head feeling light “How are you doing that?” 

He shook his head, “Another time. I’m really sorry for how I treated you. You think I’m just some asshole, but I'm more than that really. I want to be more than that. No one else has gotten to see the real me.”

“Mattheo, I see you.” Despite your pain, you reach out to cup his face between your hands. For a second, you saw the boy you first laid your eyes on that first year at the train station. The same sad eyes, “I see you.”

He sighed into your touch, it was a soft and innocent gesture he was not used to. He chuckled softly, and gently placed his hands over yours, keeping them there. He didn’t want to lose the touch, “I know you do, and that’s exactly why I'm afraid.”

You couldn’t help but imagine - how different our lives could have been for the last 6 years, if he would have just introduced himself to me. Explained why he looked so pained when I was with my family. “My parents would have welcomed you as their own” you explained your thoughts to him. “I could have protected you. You could have visited me during the holiday breaks. I know saying it will not change the past and what has happened to you. But I see you Matty.”

“yeah..it’s too late to change the past, I should’ve but I didn’t think you’d understand. It doesn’t excuse the way I treated you all these years, Y/N.” His voice got shaky, his eyes starting to water. He was a mess.

“No, don't you start Mattheo please, baby.” You brought him into a hug, again ignoring your throbbing wrist. “Easy now.” you soothed the curls that were behind his neck. They felt so soft.

Mattheo rested his head on your shoulder and held you tightly, softly crying into you. He wrapped his arms around you and held onto your shirt like he was afraid to let go. He couldn’t remember the last time someone treated him like this, it felt so new and overwhelming.

You kissed the top of his head, inhaling - cigarettes. You hated that he smoked but at this moment the smalle was comforting. He let out a deep sigh. You broke the hug only because you scooted over on the bed, and tugged him to lay beside you. We watched you, he looked so tired. He nodded in agreement with a small smile, he carefully laid beside you, making sure to be careful of your condition.

You gave him a reassuring look that wasn’t hurting you. I’m okay. You looked at your arms touching side by side, still connected by the tubing. You couldn't help but laugh, “Matty isn’t it ironic? All this pure-blood and mudblood talk and look” you carefully lifted the tube, “we’re still one and the same foundation.” You smiled at him, helping wipe his tear stained cheeks now. “Thanks for your donation to me.”

He too couldn't help but grin back at you. He couldn’t believe you weren’t pushing him away for how he treated you, or for how vulnerable he was at the moment, “any time, but please actually don’t do that ever again. You made me worried to death..”

“No I won’t. Pinky promise.” You held out your pinky for him to take. 

He took it in his own nodding, “good, you’re stuck with me now.”

With our pinkies still woven, you  looked at the size difference. You turned toward his Bambi like eyes, “let's start this over on the right foot. Better late than never? Hi i’m Y/N, [insert some fun facts about yourself].”

Mattheo smiled more widely, blushing his pinky did make yours look kiddish. It was adorable. He gave you a playful look, smirking at you like he usually would, “Nice to meet you there, Y/N. I’m Mattheo, the sexiest guy you’ll meet in Hogwarts.”

There’s my Mattheo. “And you promise to…?” you coaxed him.

He gave your pinky another squeeze, “to try to be nice and kind to you, and avoid bullying you….as well as to not smoke in your presence…you happy?”

You kind of nodded, holding in your laugh, “aaaand…?”

He looked at you, trying to read what you wanted him to say. He gave your pinky another, slightly rougher, squeeze. “And I promise not to throw a wad of gum into your beautiful hair?”

“Bingo. Mr. Riddle, that’s what I was ultimately looking for.” You let go of his pinky, “but it is nice to know the other stuff too.” you waved your hand like it was nothing, but it was my everything. He gave you a sarcastic scoff, he liked that you were still acting like your old self too. 

You kissed his cheek and his face went redder than a cherry, you acted shocked “woah did I just make Mattheo, the sexiest guy in Hogwarts BLUSH?!” You slapped your hands against your cheeks in play disbelief, slightly regretting the pain it brought to your arms. He quickly shook his head and blushed even more than originally thought possible, he tried to hide his face away from you, “S-shut up! That’s a lie! I was not blushing, it’s just your imagination.”

You laughed at his reaction, taking his hand in mine once more comparing the hand sizes. You put my head against his shoulder, before dropping your jester attitude. Making him form another pinky promise with you. “Mattheo, I promise to be there for you. I want to protect you. You shouldn’t live in the shadow of your home life, especially not alone. Just as much as I’m stuck with you. You’re stuck with me. That’s my promise to you.”

His heart beat fast, it nearly melted his heart to hear your promise. He let out a deep, shaky breath. He couldn't stop the small tear that rolled down his cheek, he didn’t bother wiping it. He just leaned his head down to rest on your own, “deal…”

There was a pause, before you spoke up again.“I know we just started the year but please, come back home with me this Christmas holiday when it rolls around.” You blinked up at him. You started to feel really sleepy, that was to be your last request and plea for the moment, “I’ll show you how muggles get down to holiday business.”

Mattheo looked down at you and smiled softly, as your eyes were struggling to stay open, “yea sure, i’ll spend the holidays with you” he wasn’t sure how he would, but he would worry about that later.

Many promises were made this day, and you intended to keep each and every single one of them. In many ways, you knew this would still be the same Mattheo you had always known, but it would all be so different now. You managed to break through his extremely guarded shell, the hardest way possible. But it needed to desperately be broken.

You turned Mattheo’s head to look at you, he met your gaze. The corner of his lip curled up as he knew what you were about to do. He let you take the lead, closing his eyes. You kissed his lips slowly, cherishing how it felt. You wanted more of him, but your body was pleading for rest. You hugged his arm and surrendered.

He couldn’t help but touch his lips afterwards with his fingertips. He watched as you gave in to exhaustion, he followed your lead and let out a deep sigh before closing his eyes, “Goodnight princess.” Mattheo fell asleep to the sounds of you breathing and the sound of your heartbeat, they would surely become one of the most blissful lullabies to be heard by him. He intertwined his fingers with yours, he wouldn’t ever let go.

[the-s1lly-corner]

CRP characters crushing on the reader 2/2

Placeholder opening here, check part 1 for the other characters! i dont usually write for zalgo because my take on him is... so... yeah... and hard to write for him, but the idea of this intangible godlike entity that can warp realities falling for someone is horrifying

Characters: Jane, Jeff, Ticci Toby, Nina, Bloody Painter, Zalgo

Notes: reader is GN but post mainly focuses on the canon characters, admin uses any pronouns for nina so if you see the pronouns swapping that's why!, heavy hcs for Zalgo and his part isnt really open for "it gets better and you guys get together" no his part is just... horrifying

CWs: zalgo is zalgo; ie non human entity does not follow human morals and is kind of... toxic and horrifying

JANE

I need you guys to bare with me because this blog has always been hc/au heavy with how I write characters but between all the main crps, Jane is probably the most likely to just.. be a normal person 90% of the time, so the chances of you and her meeting during a normal day is pretty high. She's closed off so you don't even notice that there's feelings developing on her end. If there is a difference it's just her being slightly more affectionate and open to you. She becomes even more protective of you, can you blame her? You've heard of the rumors about her family... She doesn't deny her feelings if you ask her, though, so it's a clean confession when the time comes instead of it just being spilled or forced out.

JEFF

He's so full of himself that he approaches you without thinking anything through because he's so confident that you're going to just fall for him. Makes a lot of jokes with you, some darker than others. Flirts with you up front because once more, he's so confident that you're into him that he doesn't take a moment to consider that you would reject him. Probably takes rejection the worst, at least out of the characters on this list. And that's on being on the run since your mid teen years, he didn't interact with many people because of that. "Oh you dig me" as you slap his arm because he said something dumb.

TICCI TOBY

Very similar to the other proxies, watches you from afar but he decides to interact with you sooner than the other two. He's wary, because he doesn't want to humiliate himself or screw anything up but he's so so so desperate to meet someone new who's in his age range so he's doing his best to appeal to you. Sometimes slips up because he's trying too hard. He can pester you and get on your nerves, but he doesn't mean anything wrong by it... usually.. You outright ask him if he has a crush on you and you can see him internally scrambling for something to say. It's actually a little sweet. Probably the most normal out of them all asides Jane, at least by Creepypasta standards.

NINA

Oh she is so upfront about her feelings for you! Makes you small trinkets and keepsakes with random stuff she finds. Very quick to approach you as well and make a friendship. Very chill if you don't end up returning their feelings, and more than happy to keep up a friendship with you if you want that. A yapper, too, so they have a habit of keeping you by keeping a conversation up and alive longer than others would. Custom kandi for you as well, with your favorite colors and some stuff they know you like! As an aside, Nina is a "cringe fandom enjoyer", so you guys can get into the same things and be cringe and free together! Not related to this post but have it as a bonus!

BLOODY PAINTER

He finds himself drawing you more than he draws his other subjects, and honestly its a little frustrating. You start finding some of his papers laying around. He approaches you so he can try to get even more accurate with his art, having the real thing as a reference is much better than relying off of memories of you wandering around town. Once the initial tenseness dies down, you might be able to get a few words out of him while he's drawing. "Muse of an artist" trope, a lot of the things he makes are dedicated to you in one way or another. His art is the only real tip that there's something going on, because otherwise he's good about swallowing and hiding his emotions.

ZALGO

Bonus character, Zalgo would literally alter the universe if he could to ensure that you're there and his. He can manipulate media, and create creatures.. I mean in my au he's literally the reason half the creepypastas exist... I WAS going to make a joke that he makes a stand in to act for him, but he's so into you that he can't stand the idea of someone else being with you... doesnt matter if he was living vicariously through it. Genuine psychological horror elements here with him warping the world around you in an attempt to get your attention and to get you to come to him. Technical cosmic / otherworldly horror (?) because he's something that transcends just about everything in universe. Simultaneously everywhere at anytime all the time, there is no real way to get away from him. Horrifying stuff.

[these-posts-arent-real]

Time to catch up on your favorite dashboard simulator :3

#gonna start scheduling these for 1 or 2 per day #i really enjoy making them but I think i'll get burnt out otherwise #also HUGE ty to whoever was the anon who sent me the idea #about having therian cats #ohhh my god #hey anon #(or anyone else but im talkin to u) #feel free to dm me to talk at any point you seem cool

15 notes

🔁 🐍xviper-the-fagx reblogged

🫎 mo0sedude Follow

I PASSED MY ASSESSMENT!!! AAAAAHHH

🪺 robbbinpaw Follow

OMSC CONGRATS MOOSE! I'm so happy for you!!!!

🐍 xviper-the-fagx

WOAAAHHH CONGRATULATIONS MOOOSEE!!! Have you had your name ceremony yet??

#im so happy for ya dude #moving on from apprenticeship </3 #gonna miss you in the 'apprentice things' tag

10 notes

🔁 🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow reblogged

🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow

Daily selfie !!!

Trying on some new berry-based fur dye.

🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow

The amount of cats commenting "you'll never be a she-cat" and "wearing fur dye won't make you female" is astounding. Like. Thanks?? I'm a trans guy not a trans girl...

#lol?? #this is so funny to me #trans

4,703 notes

🥬 rxttencatmint Follow

Ahh.. different type of post than usual, but.. mmrrnn... I'm considering coming out to my mentor. I know he's supportive, but I'm really nervous, so, uh.. I'm gonna leave it up to a Clanblr poll haha..

#trans #transmasc #trans tom #transgender #trans apprentice #advice #poll

4 notes

🤍 snwtl Follow

* ,○ ' WELCOME TO MY BLOG ^. o° ;

adult female cat - 49 moons - gender critical

Keep reading

#terfsafe #radfem #adult female cat #terf #riverclan

0 notes

🔁 🥬 rxttencatmint reblogged

🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow

New neighbors have THE most annoying dog I've ever met in my life. Won't shut up about how that's her yard and to get back... nobody wants your yard Jackie, shut uppp...

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

Since when do you speak dog????

🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow

I started picking it up when I moved to the twolegplace. I'm still not fluent, but I can hold a conversation with the neighborhood dogs if I want.

#every new thing i learn about kipper #just. wow #he is so coolll... #this is totally not the gender envy and parent issues speaking

2,851 notes

🔁 🌊 missingmyscales reblogged

🦊 foxx--hearted Follow

The worst part about being a fox therian is that even when I am partially accepted, it's usually because cats are telling me how horrible foxes are, and how I should've "picked a different species" because they think that's how it works.

🌊 missingmyscales Follow

Imagine being a fish. In RiverClan.

The closest I ever get to "acceptance" is my friends joking about how I would taste.

🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow

How does it feel to have to eat the thing your damaged brain thinks you are. Lol

🌊 missingmyscales Follow

Frst off. "Damaged brain" like. Oookay guess we're just being really mean to others on Clanblr today. Second off ,I dont eat fish??? I never even implied that I eat fish.

🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow

You're from RiverClan lmao. What else is there to eat

🌊 missingmyscales Follow

...

You are joking, right?

Lizards, birds, water voles and shrews, snakes, frogs, toads?? None of those come to mind when you consider the potential diet of a RiverClan warrior??????

🦊 foxx--hearted Follow

@missingmyscales you should probably just block @lalala-bluegaze, her whole blog is about being anti-kittypet, anti-therian, not believing enbies or bisexuals/any other lgbt identity than lesbian or gay or binary trans is valid, and a whole bunch of other stuff. It's not worth talking to her.

🌊 missingmyscales Follow

Ahh thanks... blocked her. I didnt think to check her blog beforehand

#sorry again for arguing on your post, Maple #saw a misconception ab RiverClan and blacked out lol

407 notes

🔁 🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass reblogged

🌾 barncat-vibes Follow

Good morning everyone <3 remember to eat breakfast and stay hydrated!

2,301 notes

🐍 xviper-the-fagx

Ithunk i atw a bug

#it difnr taste good euther :/

1 note

🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow

So I guess I'm just on this site now?? Clanblr is gone. I can't access any of its posts. But. I can see "Tumblr". Which is weird. The posts are really strange here.

[sundays-sims]

× NAVIGATION ×

patreon   |  TOU  |  instagram  |  download section

× FAQ ×

“This link is broken or doesn’t exist anymore” and “Where can I find X set”

head over my blog’s download section to have access to a list of all my free content; this is an easy-to-navigate list, with direct download links (mediafire or patreon) & includes all my older sets that had broken links.

→  download section  ←

“This bed is broken”

when the game adds new features through updates, it can break certain type of content; to update my beds & have them work properly again, you will need to re-download them here :

→  beds update  ←

“Where can I download your builds?”

my builds & rooms are not available for downloads because I do not keep them myself. I usually create simple rooms only to showcase my content & take pictures, I then delete them.

“What ReShade/GShade do you use & where can I download it?”

my GShade presets are all my own personal presets. I think that one’s preset is such nice way to add a unique touch to pictures & I won’t share any of my presets for that reason.

“Do you allow recolors & conversions to other Sims games?”

yes. I allow recolors & conversions (to Sims games ONLY), as long as my content is already released for free & out of early access. For more information, please read my terms of use;

→  terms of use / t.o.u  ←

“I just downloaded X set, and my game won’t start”

this can happen for a few reasons; your game isn’t up to date, you have a lot of duplicate packages, or files got corrupted while downloading. If you download a lot of fully finished builds with merged cc (or into different files), you could end up with a lot of duplicates of the same object. This could cause your game to be slower or even not start at all. Secondly, downloading a lot of files at the same time, especially on patreon, seems to be causing problems & corrupting files. The corrupted files will cause your game to either crash at start or give you an error message. Try taking the last files you downloaded out of your Mod folder and re-downloading the set, or sets, only one part at the time. This seems to always work for me. My content is tested by multiple people (and me) before uploading & I would not upload broken content. If you are facing issues with an older set of mine, it is most likely a problem that occurred while downloading or with your game/mod folder. I am always happy to help when it comes to my content, but I will not “fix” any other creator’s content. In short, make sure to check for: - batch fix (e.g. broken beds updates) - game updates - cc duplicates - corrupted files Lastly, if you did all the above, and are still having problems, do not hesitate to send me a direct message (DM). When it comes to troubleshooting, I will not answer comments below posts for the simple reason that it makes it difficult to have a conversation. Going back and forth with replies into a comment section makes it too difficult since it will most likely require going through a few steps to solve any further issues.

"Do you do commission work?"

no, I dont. I often take suggestions or make small polls on my social media (insta & patreon), feel free to follow me & participate in those, send me pictures of things you like etc.

"Are you WCIF friendly?"

yes. I will do my best to remember where it was from, but since I don't keep any builds in my game, it can sometimes be difficult. Also, please note that I often write a small WCIF section at the end of my posts, take the time to read all the way down!

Thank you all for being here, supporting my work & taking the time to read.

S. xx

[jewish-vents]

On my main blog i saw someone i had been following for a long time make a post about how one of their mutuals doesnt reblog donation scams because theyre secretly a zionist + they hate palestinians. I've also seen another person i follow say "only zionists are falsely claiming the gofundmes are fake".

This is the new norm.

Some of my long time mutuals as well as their moots and even random blogs i'll find tend to do this insane thing where they'll accuse everyone and anyone of being a zionist simply for no reason or even based on vibes. (Of course jews are disproportionately attacked but anyways.)

I usually dont block because i cant block everyone on the internet...i would also have to block everyone outside of jumblr.

This one time a few months back i had to block this one person tho because they had a long vague rant about a mutual who they were convinced was a zionist because

*GASPS* THEY TRY TO CALL OUT MISINFORMATION!

Insert the "ah ive seen youve fallen for the jewish trick of providing evidence" 4chan image lmfao.

I was so sad. This person had people agreeing with them (token jews and gentiles alike). Their rant could, no joke, be summed up by "idk why this mutual keeps talking about "antisemitism" and wont stop saying things like check your sources and fact check what u see.. only zionists would fact check a genocide!" I wish i was making this up. They were ranting about their most likely jewish mutual who tried to remind people to be careful of who they were listening to i.e. jackson hinkle and calling out misinformation which was "off" to the OP. Why? Because all that energy should be applied to caring about palestinians instead.........

As a result i reblog donation posts even though im sure 99% of them are scams.

Ive been uneasy since october 7th.

I dont post anything jewish because i know for a fact a mutual or a mutual's mutual will accuse me of being an evil genocidal zionist that drinks palestinian tears or something like that which would be an insane blow because i, as all humans should, care about palestinians and their oppression and suffering so such an accusation would upset me beyond words. idc about the zionist part i luv zionists but the other stuff would piss me off to tje point where i'd lose it.

I wish i wasnt such a coward. Im too scared for my safety. I dont wanna be punished for existing.

.

[cloudcountry]

thank you to the three people that tagged me in the twst author spotlight ^^ irene, siren, and sapphy, thank you. i read what you said about me and i was very touched. i didnt think i would gain so many friends in such a short period of time, and you all deserve to be recognized for your contributions to the twst community!! :D

EVERYONE LOOK AT MY FRIENDS.

@tinyletterz, who has a beautiful soul and amazing writing. i've known her since my baby days on quotev writing for a fandom which shall not be named, and it's so such a pleasure being her friend. she writes twst x reader content and has a gorgeous series about flower languages that i think about a lot. thank you remy for helping me get accustomed to tumblr, you're the og!!

@shkrmpp, who was my first mutual that i'd never met before here. thank you for asking about jellyfish and being such a bubbly presence on my dash. shrimpy writes x reader content and creates adorable art!! their hair dye series with the leech twins is super cute and i find myself thinking about teh floyd part in particular very often ^^

@fukashiin, with the prettiest themes and the gorgeous art style. winou CONSISTENTLY writes absolute bangers that make me so giddy. this one in particular is one of my favorites, and her writing style reminds me of a soft summer breeze. she's such a bubbly person and its so fun talking to her, even if we don't talk often. ^^ she's one of the three people that keeps my deuce content afloat.

one could say many things about the beloved @hisui-dreamer!! from the way she adores her friends to teh way she writes, rinna is always soft and sweet. she radiates comfort and is such a soothing person, i feel so safe around her. she writes x reader content and every single piece is its own masterpiece. she's one of my closest friends on here and i wish nothing but the best for her every day.

@merotwst, who has a bucnh of adorable oc content (on @meromessy !!) and writes x readers!! ellie in on haitus right now takinga well deserved break. <3 but she writing is amazing and i am FLOORED whenever i see her art!!! it's literally so gorgeous and i don't understand how she does it. its crazy. how is so much talent in one person.

@siren-serenity is not only a lovely author of x reader content, but also a lovely friend. ^^ siren also has an oc named melody who is so cool!!!! she was the pastor at my wedding and fought TOOTH AND NAIL for that position LMAO love u renren!!! she really writes azul SUPER WELL and im so happy to have met someone so calm and soothing to talk to.

@officialdaydreamer00, aka nutmeg, is a rascal. an absolutely rascal but they're really the best. they have a yuusona with LORE and a bunch of really creative & cute events!! seriously nutmeg, nobody does it like you. if you want to see our favorite twst boys in strawberry dresses or recieve a pair of cute earrings, irene's blog is the place for you!!!

@the-v-lociraptor has STELLAR art. she was one of my firts mutuals on twst tumblr and i was terrified of talking to people but her vibes were very much "i am nice you dont need to be afraid" and sniffling scared me was like "OKAY I CAN TALK TO YOU" LMAO but yeah. she draws people so,,, full. thats the only word i can use to describe it. they just look s soft and alive and its really so amazing. i love her art so much!!

@siphoklansan is another artist!! i think about the art she drew from loona's heart attack with twst character weekly basically. it has been stuck in my brain since i started following her. sippy, its trully beautiful how you mix your culture and your art together. i remember you talking about it when you were drawing fairy gala stuff and it was just stunning. please keep doing what you're doing!! i hope your hiatus proves restful <3

@ceruleancattail is one of THE most creative writers i have ever met on this platform. every time i check out their account theyre talking about a new au or doing something different. they write x reader stuff and ar ethe biggest cater kisser ever (even if they wont admit it hehe!!) their writing is so refreshing, if that makes sense. their butler au is so goofy whaahwwahwah

@moonlit-midnight has the prettiest writing style :((( hannah is literally so sweet and it shows in everything you can find on this blog. THIS BLOG HAS PLATONIC FICS TOO!!!! DID YOU KNOW THAT?????? and even better, they're inspired by hannah's own friendships :((( literally the most wholesome thing. you can find x reader's here!!!

@iseethatimicy is an x reader writer and fellow azul kisser!!! she writes some really cute stuff for oour favorite silly little cephalopod AND AND AND AND HAS SOME OCS!!! THATA ARE SUPER COOL!!!!! shimiko and icy are both so cool and interesting 9EVEN THOUGH IM VERY SHIMIKO BIASED AAAAA I LOEV SIREN TROPES !!!!!)

@ryker-writes IS SO KIND. he gave me the sweetest set of flowers for his garden event :(( i still think about them and aaaaa i havent forgotten when he fought me over me being cool LMAO so goofy wahhwaawh!! HIS OC JAXON AND RIDDLE ARE LITERALLY SO CUTE :((( he writes x reader content & makes oc content!!!

@totallymem3 draws occasionally and omgggg meme's art is gorgeous. HAVE YOU SEEN HER DRAW AZUL. her art is so soft and its honestly adorable :(( meme is such a nice mutual too!!! like i met her on anon a while ago we've been besties ever since fr. HER ART REMINDS ME OF SPRING GO CHECK IT OUT PLEASE!!!!!

@z3llous is SO TALENTED!!!! another mutual that im liek WOW how do you exist??? he creates the most stunning twst fanart :((( THE OCTAVINELLE BIAS IIS SO REAL AND SO SO OBVIOUS BUT WOW.....WOW IS IT GOOD. zell is also a game developer and if you like cute little kitties and adventure games you should totally try it out here!!!

@cecilebutcher MAKES THE BEST OCS. creator of igor and saver of the universe. im not kidding igor saved the universe IDC WHAT YOU SAY ITS CANON TO ME. cece i sliterally the sweetest and soososososo creative i am eating up every crumb of igor content i get fed. OM NOM NOM. ofc junto is nice too and hes so sweet!!! GAHH you just put so much love and care into yoru ocs its so admirable :((((

@ang33333333l is another azul kisser that i became mutuals with a while ago!!! dolls love for sebek and azul is very sweet to see and her yuusona fauna is adorable too!! she also draws her yuu and characters sometimes!! :D she doesn't have a lot of oc content up on dolls blog yet but im looking forward to seeing more!! >:D

@leonistic deserves the most underrated writer of the year award. soru writes x reader content and is another super sweet mutual of mien (I KNOW IM SAYING THAT A LOT OKAY.) she writes aroace content and its literally feeds me. seriously. their aroace azul content makes me giggle and kick my feet and GAHHHHH !!! plus they have the patient to do matchups which is crazy and i love them for that ^^

@rains-asleep is the nickname master because he calls me straubs and thats such an adorable nickname :(((( HIS WRITING IS SUPER CUTE AND IT GIVE SME SO MUCH SEROTONIN (they write x readers btw!!!!!) they recently hit 500 followers (CONGRATS AGAIN!!!!!) and they also write for haikyuu, mha, genshin impact, and obey me!!!

@shinysparklesapphires is an artists that has a lot of cool ocs!! i believe navi was the first one i was introduced to and he's such an icon ^^ sapphy is also really into precure and produces a lot of content for the fandom!! i have yet to finish the precure series she recommended to me but its good so far and laura is the best so true!!

@datboredpencil has THE most STUNNING art. if you want idia x cater content this is DEFINITELY THE BLOG FOR YOU!!! each piece has so much love poured into it and i swear. YOURE ALWAYS LIEK "its a work in progress" BUT IT STILL LOTS SO LOVELY :((( YOUR USE OF COLOR IS JUST SO MUAH!!! CHEFS KISS!!!!!!! I ADORE IT

@twistwonderlanddevotee makes really pretty backgrounds!!! i actually used the isaac one she made for my private account AND ITS SO CUTE I LOVE IT I WANT TO EAT IT SWALLOW IT WHOLE MUNCH ON IT SHAKE IT AROUND LIEK A DOG TOY ANYWAYS. i am very normal about sofia's backgrounds. PLEASE GO CHECK THEM OUT its literally so unique?? like who else makes backgroudns liek sofia. Nobody.

@queen-shiba has an open inbox everyone!! you're welcome to send in requests!!! ^^ the queen of savanaclaw makes oc content for chuki, a really sweet kid taht deserves all the cookies in teh world :((( ALSO!!! she has an au for the tsavo man-eaters which is super cool!!! :O she passion for lions and tigers really is admirable and its nic eto see her talk about them :3

@beeirdos-buzzing-bogaloo has a gift when it comes to making ocs!! thule remains my favorite of the ones he has talked about because his design is just so neat!!! I LOVE THAT HIS NICKNAME FROM ROOK IS "MONSIEUR STARGAZER" :((( you have so many ocs that i havent even heard about yet...so im super curious to see what else you put out!!!

@dove-da-birb IS SUCH A GENIUS. they're one of my closests friends and their writing is SO BEAUTIFUL. they're also kidn of a little shit though so watch out /aff tehy write x reader content and draw sometimes, although i dont think theyve posted any of them. ^^ dove is SUCH a delight i promise you'll have fun every single time you talk to them. their energy is infectious and im genuinely really glad im the main target for their chaos. i would not have it any otehr way.

@ashipiko has such delicious art!!! the colors are always so vibrant and the way she draws is so unique. truly, a staple of both the twisted wonderland and as3! fandoms!! her energy is always upbeat and cheery, its hard not to smile when youre talking to her!! truly the biggest ace kisser on thsi platform (probably in the world too hehe)

@shyhaya writes for a myriad of fandoms!!!!!! hayami writes an azul thing for me that made me lose my mind IT WAS SO GOOD. PLEASE check out this blog. you wont regret it. requests are open!! ^^ even twst content aside, im sure you'll find something you like sich haya writes for so many fandoms!! talk about multitalented :3

@thehollowwriter has so many gems. quinn writes every character in twst so well, teh writing is so immersive and just ughhhh MUAH!!!!! every piece with azul in it is such a banger and it makes me giggle and kick my feet :3 LITERALLY THERE IS SO MUCH X READER FLUFF AND ITS ALL GOOD ITS A CRIME I DIDNT FIND THIS BLOG SOONER.

@cyath, who has some of the PRETTIEST art i have EVER seen. they draw stuff based on my fics all of the time and i adore it so much. examples of their art can be found here, here, here, and here. do you understand what i mean. do you get it. their art style is SUPERIOR and i ADORE IT!!!!!! they truly have so much talent like damn save some for the rest of us hello!!!!!

@crheativity writes twst x readers!! she's a beginner writer so PLEASE PELASE SHOW HER SOME LOVE!!! right nwo she has some heartslabyul content that i havent gotten around to reading yet but i am SUPER excited to go through them when i get the chance!!! rhea is super fun to talk to hehe <3

and lastly, @jade-s-nymph who organized this whole thing!!! rubia is on hiatus right now but i've seen some of her projects and a few of the things she's written and they're all really good!! there's a lot of x reader content on her writing blog and self indulgent nymphleech content on her personal blog :3

[puckpocketed]

about

deepest and sincerest apologies if you came here because I was posting about one or more of your guys. this is a Sharks blog first and foremost! I do, however, follow a lot of teams. navigation + tierlist below

This is a part-time Australian Ice Hockey League blog that follows the CBR Brave! I take photos of home games when I can, find them under -> #puck!cam Otherwise, feel free to filter #auspuck.

When not LARPing as my local team’s socmed manager:

I write essays about hockey -> #my writing

all gifs i've made filed under -> #puck!gif specific team tags will look like this: #p!gif:[team abbreviation] eg. #p!gif:sharks, #p!gif:wings

transcripts -> #puck!script

gif requests -> #p!gif:req

I also gif my guys and their goals, passing sequences, poke checks, plays that go nowhere, little things I think are super cool -> #puckpocketed details series

I poke around at prospects and produce very unserious vibe checks, filed under -> #puckscouting

I also paint once in a blue moon. watch out!!!!

TIERLIST & politics

Sharks Hockey first always forever ! <3

keeping things light. no enemies only babygirls i havent met!

The most narratively satisfying things are tragedies and tragicomedies!!! All Things Through Her (The Bit)

players aren’t their orgs. If I say I like a team, this doesn’t mean I like every player, and vice versa!!

The narratives are lying to you!!! LOOK PAST THEM. THE HOCKEY TELLS THE TRUTH!!!!!

I love hockey SO much !! Love of the game comes before ANYTHING, including teams!!! Talk to me about strategy. Show me spinoramas and ankle breaking dekes and head fakes and set plays. Talk to me about face-offs and your favourite underrated blorbo.

no seriously please send me propaganda i love propaganda i am a hair trigger away from adopting new guys. i've done it mid-game and id do it again!!!!!!!!!!!

Team rivalries don’t matter to me. My girls are beating the hell out of each other? The beautiful gaeme ...

i’m here for a laff and it truly aint that serious <3

Do Not expect me to have any couth about the CBR Brave!! I keep things light with the NHL but all that doesn’t apply here — I WILL be spiteful and unhinged!! im sorry the sports nationalism got to me!!!

that being said: CALIFORNIA SWEEEP!

housekeeping

hey please dont be weird in the tags of my posts about teams/players i clearly like. yeah even That Team. i don't want to hear about how you hope someone "escapes" or how much you hate xyz player. make your own post.

this is a non-rpf blog. I might lean into the narratives but tbh I’m not into men and don’t get much out of romantic shipping. Nothing against it though! I think everyone should engage with hockey however they like as long as it does no harm to themselves or others. Ride that ship into the sunset my loves we are holding fins 👍

gifs, videos, memes, photos by me will come described with alt text. I try my best as someone who has used a screenreader in the past, but please let me know if I miss anything.

30/07/2024 sources for any media i post will be linked to a live site + using the wayback machine when I can, or just live websites when I can't (in the case of youtube videos). yeah ok i finally gave in @ that one anon calling this wikipedia editor behaviour you are correct and WHAT OF IT!!!!!!!

5/08/2024 - NOTE live website links always precede archive links whether I label them or not. if there is no link 'pair' it means the wayback machine can't snapshot the link i put up. In the case of twitter/instagram and other such sites that require a logged in device to view certain pages i will do my best to grab the direct img link and archive that.

[ link 1, archive link // link 2, archive link ] <- self explanatory, long form.

[ x, x ] <- single source of media, will use for aesthetic purposes on gifsets and formal web weaving. same with: [ x || y // x || y ] <- "//" double slash denotes a new source, x is the live link, y is the archive link.

if a link or source is not immediately obvious I may have: 1) done an in-line link, click any underlined or bold-underlined text; 2) I might have missed it by mistake, please be patient and maybe shoot me a flag about it in my inbox/dms if you want !!! we are all human and I'm doing my best <3

I'm aware this is not the most fastidious archival practice! my goal isn't to be the arbiter of archival standards for sourcing. I don't know how long I'll love hockey or these teams, how long tumblr will be around, but going from here I'd just like this blog to be a place where fans years from now can come back to and not have to do as much digging as I did to source media.

[amywritesthings]

... a lil personal thing i can delete later, just me being seasonally depressed 😅 ...

eeek, i feel very apathetic about being on tumblr atm. i feel wildly disconnected to it, and i have to keep reminding myself not to compare myself to others and follow my own advice.

i think my issue is that i don't follow many people to begin with, so i should probably check my follower listing every once in a while and actually follow people 😅 i've gotten so bad at that the last year since my dash usually makes me very anxious unless if i'm consistently posting, so i dont look at other blogs unless if i find them linked on ao3 for the longfics i'm reading

i primarily use this blog to post my works and answer questions. i'm not really in any fandom/community. and sometimes i do wish i was? i tried at the beginning to be in a big community but constantly felt like i wasn't good enough, or there was major drama and it was competitive and weird, so i detached completely to just be some outlier in all of these fandoms.

i feel like i don't really belong anywhere.

i'm not privy in any friend group or community. i lurk for the most part in any friend servers or initiatives or group challenges, but a part of it is because i just always assume no one wants me around so i just don't participate 💀 so the onus is on me to make friends, and stay consistent with said friends, rather than posting my works and dipping until i have a new major update.

i'm mostly grateful for those who are brave enough to send me a DM or inbox mssg - i've met a lot of amazing people that way, and i cannot stress to you individuals how much you all mean to me.

idk man!!!! it's just tough sometimes to have this as your hobby. especially when you log on and you're like damn, so many people i started this hobby are so far removed from me but still hang all together and participate in calls and chats and inside jokes and i'm like the weirdo people still follow out of pity or something, idek.

✨✨✨ seeeeasonal depression and perfectionismmmmm

[noblehcart]

Guess who's baack? Its me with a new take on things and tired of running my blog the way I was. SO FIRSTLY, thank you all so much to those who commented and liked my hiatus post 💕💕 I felt so terribly horrifically alone, scared and felt like I was just spiraling into i don't know what and all of the lovely comments and likes on that post helped me immeasurably so thank you all.

I want to give an especially big shout out to @myhiraeth, @leadtohell & @lordofthestrix for reaching out even further to make sure i was okay even after that post because I was just in a seriously bad place and because these lovely people were continually checking in on me. These three I consider my closest friends and phenomenal writers so please go check out their blogs and hit up the muns because they're truly some of the loveliest nicest people on the site.

As for this blog there will be some shifting, deleting and change ups. I will be closing ranks a bit more, especially around to those that did reach out in some manner of way to check on me. Something I realized over this time is that I write best with friends and friends who write back with me. I get not everyone has time to write and be on tumblr, that is not what i mean by writing, I mean simply conversing with me. As I've said before I don't need you to actually thread with me just...talk with me. Plot with me. Tell me about your day. Talk with me about whatever crossed your mind. I write best with friends I trust and who trust me. It does not mean communication has to be on the daily, its whatever generalized communication we set it up as or whenever something pops into mind, but that's how I write and that's how I write best. Me being on this site is getting increasingly difficult and so I am trying my damnedest to stay on, but I can only do so in the company of friends. Friends who check in on each other and write with each other and think of each other and their muses. That's the environment I want to cultivate during my time on here.

I still have an insane IRL going on that is intensely private so that means my time is also hectic, but I am the kind of friend who will try to check in on you and think of you and your muses if you are close to me. However that interest will diminish and drop the less and less I see invested into me as well. I am no longer the sit and wait friend, I am the 'im as invested in you as you are in me' and therefore whatever writing experience you want to cultivate with me requires involvement. I may lose 'friends' or followers and that is fine. I completely understand, but this shift of life that I'm experiencing has brought me to this point of exhaustion of always being the friend who stays and waits. If you want to come write with me then please come write with me and if not that is entirely fine.

But I want my writing partners to be my friends and for the large part most of you ARE my friends because that is what truly develops the best plots, writing and fun and why I love being here with you all.

TO DO LIST:

delete majority of drafts (i need a fresh start with the upcoming year)

unfollow people ( a lot of inactive or people who i dont write with)

revamp old characters (luka mikhailov; i'm tired of letting him sit in the wings)

remove muses (Inej Gh.afa, gleb vag.anov, Dr. Henry Mo.rgan, Chri.stine Chapel , Christi.ne Da.ae , Farazeneh Shir-Del, Gabby Christ.ensen, Ana Mcclain, Paul Chauv.elin, Cassian, Gwyn Ber.dara, J.ason Todd, Nest.a Arc.heron, Ela.in Arche.ron )

add new muses (iris winnow, etienne ainsworth, esme lennox)

create new sideblogs for specific muses (Inej ghafa, gleb vaganov, the ivanovs?)

new mumu blog to be decided?

[oraclemoontarot]

ahh ur cool to chat with.

im sure kpop has set ways but lately im uncertain as to what they are aiming for... loved enhypens recent comeback it was so cool, did u see it yet? but again theyre an other group I can only really like and its so strange to me when theres teens who r obviously much younger than myself overly obsessing and being possesive over the idols bc i had exactly the same stance about western bgs during the 00s. now im kind of just enjoying them for the music and dont feel the need to deeply obsess over every detail but tarot blogs r so fun to ask qs and find out stuff we couldnt find out about one direction etc etc. it honestly seems so long ago the 00s and its weird bc when u find a new group and theyre so young i have to check difference in age gaps nowadays (lowkey wish there wasnt an age concept at all in society bc then it wouldnt matter). but ngl it is so awkward, like even seeing how ppl nowadays still flock to harry styles home town (yes also did that myself). yet kpop in general has so many cool themes and vast difference in terms of performance styles as well.

ik its only awkward if u make it awkward but ppl kinda take obsessing abt idols way too far. yet we have all been thru that phase so i get it but kpop stans seem next level crazy sometimes in a good way sometimes in a bad way, i also dont get how such delusional obsessions can lead to building closer relationship with said idol like u aint just going to make friends if ur crying over them in front of them yaknow? and other stuff like going to their hotels or following them whilst theyre out in their downtime. i dont think theres ever just been a non crazy time for idols at all. i cant imagine what their dorm rooms must be like cause I bet they all been doing other adult / human things lmfao. yet the way their fans overreact to mere dating rumors is ridiculous atp. or say for instance idols future spouses as well is the topic that seem to get ppl most riled up when it comes to thee sorts of readings. lowkey sometimes i ask why do i need to know but i ask anyway bc why the fuck not then i think its childish of me lol

aw tyy so are you!! I haven't watched their mv or listened to their album yet (if it wasn't a single), but I heard parts of it online and it does sound real good, I used to be an engene so maybe it's a sign to listen to this comeback.

no I get you so much here especially. Being a fan(girl) is so so much fun, you get to watch content, listen to music, learn about the members, go to concerts, collect merch, and meet other fans. There's a whole culture and community around it that, when you first get into kpop, it's so exciting. It's unsurprising people would get obsessed at first.

But yeah, I personally get really excited watching their content or over an idol (ahem haechan) when on my own, but whenever I meet them in person it's like all that excitement disappears and I'm like, 'oh, they're just a guy/person...', and it's really chill. I don't at all know how people think following them around, partaking in every single fancall, and getting overly excited and emotional would lead to them getting close with them.

You know, I think this obsessiveness dies down as we mature/get older. It's like we have other things to focus on, we become more grounded with less free time, and distance ourselves a little more.

Please, just imagining they're probably lying in bed scrolling through videos etc. while at home is kinda funny. They likely do what we do anyway as they're people at the end of the day, it kind of makes you see them more... normally?

We're alike haha. Yeah it's fun, especially with ideal type readings etc. but then you take a step back and think, am I doing too much? 😭

[joxterjoestar]

short announcement!

it's been a while since i opened a separate account (not a sub or alternate blog!) and i've been trying to be active there as much as possible since i'm pursuing to start posting personal, original content again!

the past weeks, i've been focusing on my webcomic and that's why this account went on hiatus. i don't want to start posting og content here because im sure most of people who followed came for snufmin / moomin content and i don't want to stir confusion! (mainly on my part since i want to keep things categorized and in order).

with that being said, i've moved to @konk0rde and this account will still be open if i ever hyperfixate on the fandom again! moomins is a meaningful franchise for me so i'll definitely come back. but if you wanna look into my art, check my new account! i'll also post webcomic stuff there soon!!

thank you for the support! here's a lil smooch doodle. i'll see y'all sometime, someday :)

((do not reblog if you dont feel the need to!!))

[adversitybloomed]

SHIPPING INFO // ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSE(S) SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S) ?

so i have two exclusive ships and part of the reason is they are my top OPT which they also know ━━ @battleguqin 's Lan Sizhui is one of my top OTP right now, considering we the mun's legit talk every single day. we write together every single day ( discord is our friend when we can't do tumblr ) && our muses really enjoy each other.

another one of my OTP is is @caracarnn 's Rand Al'Thor whom i adore. We get to talk as often as we can OOC wise && when we get to write a lot of the time it is both here but mostly on discord as well, which helps us a great deal.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE ?

it really depends. if its underage stuff, i struggle with it only because i dont mind writing puppy love, but i do not want them to go full out just yet. but considering most ships i have are immortal / power based ━━ it makes it harder to say. for me its not about that, its more about how our muses feel about each other && what we the muns feel comfortable plotting && writing. does this make sense ?

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW ?

Anything that means clothing is off is considered nsfw && will be tagged as such.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING ?

HIGHLY. i have had really bad experiences with Mulan. like bro the stories i can tell you... i have had put rules up in place in order to protect not just myself but also Mulan from that happening again. I am a chemistry based shipper. so if our muses have it ? fantastic, lets ship. if only one does, let's do the one sided thing. but if there is no chemistry it is hard to have a ship.

WHO ARE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH ?

i answered the three big ships above. but i also have a ship going with Merlin Nuallian, which is with @fatheredlegend && @calcifydamage 's Caleb Malphas.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU ?

Yes. If you have a ship you want to explore with me, ask. but also be prepared for the answer of "Lets wait and see". not because I do nto want to ship, but because I have been burned badly before && Mulan is picky.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS ?

I love shipping. legit love it. love all the aspects, the good && the bad. i won't lie, i will spam you with plots, i will spam with asks && images that remind you of our muses. but i also respect peoples time && will not hound for a reply && if my partner has other ships going ?? i want to read them && love on those too.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP ?

Yes. Let us spread the love !

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM ?

erm. my mulan really does not fall into any fandom, so imma skip. just look at my above answer.

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU ?

please just come talk to me ooc wise. let me vibe check with you. let me write with you && see how our muses get along. if we both feel something ? heck yeah let's ship. but please also understand, shipping is not my first priority. Mulan legit looks for friendships first && if she falls ? its legit news to her because she thinks she's getting sick >_<

but yeah, open communication is key to me. just come talk about it.

[marunalu]

Hola Maru!! Quería preguntarte si podrías recomendarme páginas o blogs como este que hablan de teorías, solo que de Star wars, tus blogs favoritos de star wars, sobre todo los que enfocan a relación de Vader y Luke. Recién ví las pelis y me encantaron, pero a diferencia de bnha no se buscar muy bien los blogs de Star wars, y me gustaría encontrar blogs como este que me divierten con sus teorías, pero más enfocados a Star Wars. Muchas gracias, espero no molestarte!!

Oh dont worry, you dont bother me at all. Honestly I dont follow any star wars blogs myself, I just visit certain star wars tags from time to time. I think if you want to find specific stuff that focuses on luke and vader, you need to search in the darth vader or luke skywalker tag and if you like a post just check out the blog and look if its what your looking for. I also post vader and luke centric stuff from time to time. Actually I plan to focus on lukes and vaders relationship in the comics very soon. I would actually recommend the star wars and darth vader comics from 2015 and 2020 to you, they are for the most time pretty good only the art sucks quite often. The star wars and darth vader comics 2015 happen before "the empire strikes back". The 2015 star wars comics focus for the most part on lukes journey to become a jedi and while vader doesnt show up all the time, he still plays a big part in them and is trying to find luke. Its also in these comics that he finds out that luke is his son and becomes obssessed with him. The darth vader 2015 comics focus completly on vader and his journey how he became supreme commander of the imperial navy between "a new hope" and "the empire strikes back". The events in these comics happen at the same time then the star wars comics. We see the moment how vader finds out about luke from his pov and how he tries to find out more about him and catch him. So while luke himself doesnt really show up in the darth vader comics, he is still constantly on vaders mind and his main focus/motivation. The star wars 2020 and darth vader 2020 comics are still going on and happen AFTER "the empire strikes back". You can read all of them online.

I will include your other ask if I now any good vader/luke fanfictions. There are TONS of very good fanfictions who focus on these two on "archive on our own", just google for "vader luke fanfictions" and it should be the first thing that shows up. I espicially like DragonflyonBreak, SilverDaye and Sparklight works, but believe me there are so much more really great fanfictions who focus on father and son. Just start at the last page and work yourself to the first one 😉

I dont know if you have watched them yet, but I also recommend to you to watch the prequel trilogy, espicially if you want to understand anakins journey how and WHY he bacame darth vader, because thats really important and since lukes and leias mother padme is mentioned in most vader and luke fanfictions and also the darth vader comics its important to know her character. A lot of people say the prequels are terrible, but personally I really like them. They are not perfect and there are a few things I think were stupid, but for the most part I really enjoyed them. If you liked yoda and obiwan in the original trilogy too, you will get tons of them in the prequels.

[accreature]

im back nerds (maybe)

hi anyone that still follows me and uses this website

its been idk 5? years since i was on here? every other social media ive used has been worse than this place was in middle/high school. (i think im not using it anymore, but theres a chance i might go back to fedi, my main there is codicil@discordian.social.) i figured a lotta the good memories here were due to rose-tinted glasses so i never really came back. but thats a bad reason, so hey again. if i stick around ill update my blog more. but if not, then this is just a check-in to say im still around and doing alright.

(also this is NOT about reddit i have not used it in a long time im not cringe i swear im not guys you gotta believe me)

so much has changed since i was here last; i went to school in China, dropped out, dated someone 10 years older than me for far too long, Had A Bad Time, REDACTED for a while, moved to Colorado, worked in a spice warehouse, and got a job doing software bull shit a year ago. im pretty good at it and happy at work. i haven't drank in a year. i successfully transed my gender ( >:( voice training does NOT count as part of that) and look kinda cute now. i have a cat who is named Enoki, like the mushroom. i have new and frustrating health problems, most of all the chronic tired sleepy disease. so much life that doesn't fit in this text box, but somehow it still doesn't feel like i've lived enough.

last, a line to say: everything below this was from when i was 18 or younger. i fully endorse all of it, with love, except for the stuff i dont.

=============================================

[vividracing]

New Post has been published on https://www.vividracing.com/blog/new-project-car-widebody-porsche-964-and-its-not-rwb/

New Project Car Widebody Porsche 964 And Its NOT RWB!

If you have been a fan of Vivid Racing for a long time, you know that we are Porsche crazy! I am sure there are some followers that will remember all the wild stuff that went on the 6speedonline Forums that we were apart of back in 2006-2012. If you don’t, dont worry, we made sure to keep all our Project Cars on display on the Vivid Racing Gallery Here. So with the last Project Porsche as a 992 GT3, most people thought we would get the new 992 GT3RS. But guess what, that didn’t happen. Plus what can you do it? So we decided to look for an Aircooled Porsche and came across this awesome 1990 Porsche 964 Carrera 4 from RMC Miami that was imported from Japan. So besides being an older Porsche what else is unique? This car is features exterior modifications from Sunburst Japan and a chassis/engine setup from Ikeda Engineering. But is Sunburst cooler than RWB? We ask the question!

Watch the video on the search and purchase/delivery of this Porsche.964 Carrera and let us know what you think. Make sure to subscribe as we will be doing a multi-part series that includes adding Recaro Seats, Installing a full radio with Rockford Fosgate speakers, installing a Momo Steering wheel, adding air condition, and taking the car on rally drives.

Check out the full gallery of images we have too here – https://www.vividracing.com/blog/gallery/nggallery/vr-project-cars/porsche-964-sunburst

We are your Recaro Seat Specialist so hit us up for seats! See them here – https://www.vividracing.com/index.php?keywords=recaro+seats&manufacturers_id=198

Keep shopping all those Porsche Products on Vivid Racing Here.