#from recording or taking pictures of the FIRST TIME taylor performs here

[wdapteo]

apparently it isn't allowed for people to record/photograph the shows here in Brazil. let's see how that works out lol

[backup-baby-backup]

Writing of Speak Now

Rampant speculation warning! Since Speak Now was basically a solo project, there aren't any other songwriters to spill the beans on the songwriting process, so most of this is inference and/or rampant speculation. Don't take this as being 100% factual. There are also some details about her personal life in this account, which I recognize is not warmly received by all, so do avert your eyes if you don't.

The years that each song was written are plucked from the US Copyright Office, so at least they should be accurate.

Often-used sources: @tswiftmyspace, @10yearsoftaylor

31 October 2006: Taylor opens for Jake Owen in Portland, Oregon at a bar.

2 November 2006: Taylor writes Sparks Fly.

The above message seems to have been posted by Steve of the IC, who despite his many flaws is generally a pretty accurate source.

On 13 June 2010, Taylor would hold a 13-hour meet and greet at the CMA Fest, where she would be pestered by fans to include Sparks Fly on her next album.

October 2008: Joe Jonas breaks up with Taylor over a 27-second phone call.

8 March 2009: John Mayer tweets about wanting Taylor to sing on his song Half Of My Heart. Taylor happily agrees.

April 2009: Taylor writes If This Was A Movie with Martin Johnson.

Not much proof for this date aside for the "six months gone and I'm still reaching" line. Since the copyright file gives a creation date of 2009, this song could only be about Joe Jonas.

This song could have also been one of the songs she recorded on March 19th or the songs she wrote "a few weeks before" May 29th.

Either way, I still think it's more likely that If This Was A Movie was the first song written for Speak Now, according to her account of the songwriting process for the album, where she gradually gave up on making cowrites.

24 April 2009: Taylor writes Haunted.

Speculation: here Taylor said she got the idea for a song "at 3:00 a.m. in Arkansas". I think this is Haunted, as she also explicitly said elsewhere that she "ended up waking up in the middle of the night writing this song about it".

Taylor performed in Jonesboro, AR on thid day on the Fearless tour.

22 May 2009: John Mayer makes a surprise appearance on the Fearless tour, where he and Taylor perform White Horse and Your Body Is A Wonderland. Superman is possibly written about this encounter.

Taylor said this about Superman before the one time she played it live:

This is about, well, a guy, as usual. And this was a guy that I was sort of enamoured with, as usual. The song actually got its title by something that I just said randomly in conversation. He had walked out of the room, when I looked over at one of my friends and I said, "Man, it's just like watching Superman fly away."

Since Superman is obviously about John Mayer (for example, its lyrics are the secret message for Dear John), this was probably an interaction with John backstage on this day, where her friends would be there (not so for the other interactions they had in December).

Also, Superman was registered with Better Than Revenge, Last Kiss and Mr. Perfectly Fine in the Sony/ATV catalogue, which points to a creation date of early 2009.

I also don't like the implications of them singing Your Body Is A Wonderland at all.

23 May 2009: John Mayer tweets a picture of Taylor. They were likely recording Half Of My Heart.

Thanks to this masterpost by @silkchifffon!

30 May 2009: Taylor records some songs she wrote a few weeks before. One of these might be Last Kiss.

Not much proof for this date, just that I don't think if she had been aggravated by Much Better already, she wouldn't be writing Last Kiss.

12 June 2009: Much Better by the Jonas Brothers is released. It includes a not-very-subtle reference to Taylor Swift.

1 July 2009: Taylor is "recording a bunch of new songs". One of these might be Better Than Revenge, which would mean the song was written in June 2009.

Better Than Revenge references Much Better, but also claims that Camilla still "has him", which means it was written before the two broke up, which was reported on July 27th. Therefore, Better Than Revenge must have been written between June 12th and July 27th.

30 July 2009: Taylor (Swift) meets Taylor (Lautner) on the set of Valentine's Day.

August 2009: Taylor writes Never Grow Up.

The content of the song suggests that this song is about her first night in her self-bought Nashville condo (NOT the house she used for secret sessions, which was bought in 2010). According to public records, she bought this apartment on August 6th, so she probably spent a night there in the same month between her Omaha performance on the 9th and leaving for London on the 19th.

The secret message suggests she moved out in July, which I think means that she "officially" moved out and stopped living with her parents in July 2010. This could be because her condo was still under renovation as late as the May 2010 Vogue issue.

13 September 2009: Just guess.

15 September 2009: Taylor attends an Adam Young concert in New York City. That night she writes Enchanted in her hotel room.

For extra proof, compare the dress she wears in these candids and the one she wears in Adam Young's (in)famous Tumblr post.

Early December 2009: Taylor writes Ours shortly before her 20th birthday.

11th December 2009: Taylor performs Half Of My Heart with John Mayer at the Z100 Jingle Ball. Rumours of her dating John start to circulate after this.

13th December 2009: Taylor (Swift) turns 20. Taylor (Lautner) attends her birthday party and gets dumped shortly after.

Early January 2010: Taylor records some songs again. One of these might be Speak Now.

This obviously relies on the common theory that Speak Now is about Hayley Williams watching her ex-boyfriend Josh Farro get married, so obviously if that's wrong this entire section is wrong too.

Hayley and Taylor were hanging out a lot in late 2009/early January, one instance of which is seen in the linked Myspace post above. I think Hayley told Taylor about Josh Farro marrying someone else during this period.

26th January 2010: Taylor is photographed leaving John Mayer's show.

I personally think they broke up shortly after this (IIRC they weren't even photographed together afterwards until the CMT Music Awards), especially as the February 13th Lover Journal entry kind of implies she wasn't seeing anyone at the time. But that's for another thread.

28th January 2010: Taylor is seen with Cory Monteith for the first time.

31st January 2010: Taylor wins Album of the Year at the Grammys for Fearless. She duets with Stevie Nicks and is widely panned.

1st February 2010: Bob Lefsetz reviews her Grammys performance.

11th February 2010: Taylor (Lautner)'s birthday passes and Taylor (Swift) doesn't call.

22nd February 2010: "I've been writing a lot of songs." Some of these might have been Mean and Dear John.

This placement is mainly because after Scott Borchetta heard Mine he told her to write more songs like that, saying that she had found "true north" with the song (see below). Dear John and Mean are clearly not like Mine so they probably came before that encounter.

Scott Borchetta was out defending Taylor on February 4th, which probably points to the writing of Mean around this time.

The timing of Dear John obviously depends on when she broke up with John Mayer, so your mileage might vary. (I am partial to this timing though, as this would mean that she came up with Dear John on tour, which might remind people of another track 5.) I think that she had broken up with him by February 13th, however, due to the Lover Journal entry where she's waiting for someone amazing to come into her life.

Late February 2010: Taylor writes Mine and plays it to Scott Borchetta, who loves the song.

Taylor was in Australia on February 3rd and returned on the 22nd, so she probably played Mine for Scott Borchetta late in the month.

March 2010: Taylor finishes Innocent.

According to this article, it took six months for Taylor to write a response to the VMA incident. This article also mentions that Innocent was written between February and June, so it checks out.

Late March/Early April 2010: Taylor writes Back To December.

More rampant speculation: here Taylor says the first verse was based on an actual conversion, so Taylor (Lautner) did make time to see her. I suspect that was on March 24th, when they had a lunch date in Beverly Hills. So she probably wrote Back To December shortly after that day when that memory was still fresh.

3 April 2010: Josh Farro and Jenna Rice get married. Taylor is in attendance.

13 April 2010: [Lover Journal] Scott Borchetta rejects the idea of using Enchanted as the album title. Taylor picks Speak Now instead.

5 June 2010: Taylor performs her last Fearless Tour show at the Gilette Stadium. That night she writes Long Live.

Speculation: I think this was the song she conceived of at midnight in Boston.

Fun fact! Long Live was originally going to have the subtitle We Will Be Remembered.

9 June 2010: Taylor runs into John Mayer at the CMT Music Awards. That night she pens the first line of The Story Of Us.

16 June 2010: [Lover Journal] Taylor finishes The Story Of Us.

15 July 2010: Taylor records the strings for Back To December and Haunted at Capital Studios, arranged by Paul Buckmaster. [credit: @taylor-on-your-dash]

For proof, compare the dress she wears in these candids and the one she wears in the NBC Thanksgiving Special while recording Haunted.

25 October 2010: Speak Now is released.

[thesinglesjukebox]

MIRANDA LAMBERT - "WRANGLERS"

Use promo code "JUKEBOX" at checkout to get 20% off your first pair of jeans...

[5.36]

Alfred Soto: She didn't write a note or a word for this, and I can tell. It's as if someone typed "Gunpowder and Lead" and "Mama's Broken Heart" into ChatGPT and out came "Wranglers." The brawny production hinders: every rote syllable gets punched up. [4]

Aaron Bergstrom: Miranda Lambert knows her way around a great revenge song, so I have no idea how something as bloodless as "Wranglers" made it past quality control. This sounds like if "Kerosene" was taken over by a hedge fund. [4]

Nortey Dowuona: Someone needs to get Audra Mae on the record on how long Wranglers take to burn. We would all learn a great deal. I mean, they're jeans, how long do they -- wait. [10]

Ian Mathers: See, other jeans burn like this [crowd goes "ooooh"] but Wranglers burn like this [crowd loses it, uproarious laughter]. Wranglers be burnin', amirite folks? [crowd goes absolutely feral with joy, rips up seats, destroys stadium] [6]

Katherine St. Asaph: As a bar, "Wranglers take forever to burn" sounds badass until you think about it -- so you're what, waiting around your no-good ex's house for a couple hours watching yourself fail to commit arson? As a piece of maybe-product placement, it's no "Wrangler butts drive the cowgirls nuts." [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Just as schlocky as Chris Stapleton's take on prestige-country RAWK; just as charming, too -- you get the sense that Lambert knows she could do a little better than replicating the feel of "The Chain" for the Taylor Sheridan aesthetic universe, but she's clearly having fun. The drums unfortunately sound like Stadium Arcadium-era Red Hot Chili Peppers, but everything else is gorgeously-wrought in the way that Lambert's best singles sound: it's not subtle and brilliant in the way that "Bluebird" or "Vice" were, but even unsubtle Lambert can be an exceedingly good time. [7]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: The way that the chorus descends -- as if engulfed by flames and consumed by vitriol -- is satisfying as hell. This one is for your inner pyro.  [7]

Taylor Alatorre: One of the purposes of a song like "Wranglers," even if Lambert will deny this, is to demonstrate how much more "real" its performer is than Nashville newcomers like, for instance, Dasha. Which is fine on its own: gatekeeping, in forms both benign and ugly, has been a country tradition since it was still being called "hillbilly music," and it makes more sense to police the authentic in a genre whose very name embeds it in the soil. Lambert certainly sounds more comfortable tossing around the signifiers of battle-scarred, woman-scorned country than Dasha does -- maybe too comfortable, if all the instant "Kerosene" comparisons are any indication. But there's one fatal flaw that "Wranglers" shares with "Austin," and it's the intended wham line in the chorus that serves only to douse the narrative in the cold waters of an anti-climax. Steer your mind away from the familiar abstractions of vengeance and female autonomy, and actually picture what Lambert is asking us to picture here: does a pile of faded blue jeans burning in the desert sun for half an hour longer than expected really sound all that satisfying to observe? Why write a revenge fantasy where it can be assumed that the revenger is impatiently checking her watch every few minutes, waiting for the fantasy to be over already? [3]

Jonathan Bradley: A far cry from “Kerosene” or “Gunpowder and Lead,” what’s supposed to be a barn-burner turns out to be a damp squib due to a muddy mix that chokes the guitar in indistinct haze, taking Lambert’s own voice with it. Soggy kindling results in little heat and so much smoke you can’t make out much of anything at all. [4]

Mark Sinker: A pop song is after all no more than a cluster of commodities circulating within a set of interlinked markets -- so how is a Brit listener my age (me) still faintly rattled when said song’s burden is a straight-up major brand-name placement? As if that’s somehow not allowed (or anyway not really cricket). Blame the BBC’s straight-up long-term ban on any hint of advertising in anything they broadcast, and the penumbras of ideology beneath and alongside that ban, the smoke and the steel shaping my inner mind: it’s like The Who never Sold Out; like the late Nick Kamen kept his laundrette Levis on to Marvin’s “Grapevine,” like Sigue Sigue Sputnik never sold literal ad-space slots on their first LP (for L’Oréal, EMI, i-D magazine and more); it’s like Run DMC went barefoot. I escaped it enough that Vybz Kartel, Gaza Slim and Popcaan excitedly hymning their nice new furry suede shoes is one of my all-time favourite Jukebox entries. Sadly this is no “Clarks”: after a misleading Morricone lens-flare it slumps quickly into charred serge and claggy ash. No ethical immolation under capitalism! [5]

Michael Hong: If this is Miranda's attempt at returning to being the shit-talker and the fire starter, well, it sounds like she's got her kindling stacked too neatly and forgotten her matchbook at home. [4]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[midnightsslut]

Taylor Swift Tours Masterpost

Hey everyone! For absolutely no reason at all, I’ve decided to compile a masterpost of all the regular setlists, surprise songs, covers, and guests on Taylor’s tours with links to YouTube videos when available (I’m only including videos that weren’t featured in official tour movies). I’ve noticed that, although there are posts like this for specific tours, like Red or reputation, some of this information is pretty hard to find, and it might be useful to some to have it all in one place. Also, I’m something of a Taylor Swift live performance ~connoisseur (💀), so I thought I might share. :) Here we go

Note: This is only part one. I don’t know when the posts for Red, 1989, and reputation will be up.

Part One: Fearless & Speak Now

Fearless Tour (April 23, 2009-July 10, 2010)

This tour did not feature a ‘surprise song slot,’ but she did sometimes change the setlist up a bit. She also brought out a couple of surprise guests (most notably John Mayer and Katy Perry), but not nearly as many as she did on her later tours.

Regular setlist: Fearless Tour

1. ‘You Belong with Me’

2. ‘Our Song’

3. ‘Tell Me Why’

4. ‘Teardrops on My Guitar’

5. ‘Fearless’

6. ‘Forever & Always’

7. ‘Hey Stephen’

8. ‘Fifteen’

9. ‘Tim McGraw’

10. ‘White Horse’ (x)

11. ‘Love Story’

12. ‘The Way I Loved You’ (x)

13. ‘You’re Not Sorry’ / ‘What Goes Around… Comes Around’ (x)

14. ‘Picture to Burn’

15. ‘Change’ (x)

16. ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ (2009) (x) OR ‘Today Was a Fairytale’ (2010)

17. ‘Should’ve Said No’ (extended version)

Footnotes:

*Starting from the show in Uncasville, Connecticut on August 28, 2009, ‘Change’ was removed from the setlist. It was added back in Greensville, South Carolina on September 4, 2009. Starting from the show in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania on October 1, 2009, it was removed again.

*European shows on the 2009 leg often removed ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ as well as ‘Change.’

*Starting from the show in Brisbane, Australia on February 4, 2010, ‘Today Was a Fairytale’ replaced ‘I’m Only Me When I’m with You’ in the encore.

Surprise songs:

1. ‘The Best Day’ - Evansville, Indiana (April 23, 2009) Note: This was actually the first show of the tour. Unfortunately, I haven’t found a video of this performance.

2. ‘Two Is Better Than One’ - Brisbane, Australia (February 4, 2010) (x)

3. ‘The Best Day’ - Moline, Illinois (May 8, 2010) (x)

4. ‘Jump Then Fall’ - Foxborough, Massachusetts (June 5, 2010) (x)

Surprise guest performances:

1. ‘Your Body is a Wonderland’ and ‘White Horse’ (already part of the regular acoustic set but performed as a duet here) with John Mayer - Los Angeles, CA (May 22, 2009) (x)

2. ‘The Way You Love Me’ with Faith Hill - Nashville, TN (September 12, 2009) (x)

3. ‘Hot N Cold’ with Katy Perry - Los Angeles, CA (April 15, 2010)

Speak Now World Tour (February 9, 2011-March 18, 2012)

Regular setlists:

Eurasia (February 9, 2011-March 30, 2011)

Note: All of the performances linked below are from the Eurasian leg. Therefore, their quality is questionable. I’m only including these because this leg had a slightly different wardrobe than the North American leg which was recorded for the tour movie. I’m not including videos from performances where the costume is the same.

1. ‘Sparks Fly’

2. ‘Mine’

3. ‘The Story of Us’

4. ‘Back to December’ / ‘Apologize’ / ‘You’re Not Sorry’ (x)

5. ‘Better Than Revenge’ (x)

6. ‘Speak Now’

7. ‘Fearless’ / ‘I’m Yours’ / ‘Hey, Soul Sister’

8. ‘Fifteen’ (x)

9. ‘You Belong with Me’

10. ‘Dear John’ (x) - I’m only including this video because she wore her hair loose lol

11. ‘Enchanted’ (x)

12. ‘Long Live’ (x)

13. ‘Love Story’ (x)

North America & Oceania (May 21, 2011-March 18, 2012)

This is based solely on the first North American show

1. ‘Sparks Fly’

2. ‘Mine’

3. ‘The Story of Us’

4. ‘Our Song’

5. ‘Mean’

6. ‘Back to December’ / ‘Apologize’ / ‘You’re Not Sorry’

7. ‘Better Than Revenge’

8. ‘Speak Now’

9. ‘Fearless’ / ‘I’m Yours’ / ‘Hey, Soul Sister’

10. ‘Last Kiss’

11. ‘You Belong with Me’

12. ‘Dear John’

13. ‘Enchanted’

14. ‘Haunted’

15. ‘Long Live’

16. ‘Fifteen’

17. ‘Love Story’

Notes:

Starting from the show in Toronto, Canada on July 15, 2011, Taylor started playing acoustic covers right after her performance of ‘Last Kiss.’

Starting from the show in Denver, CO, on September 27, 2011, ‘Ours’ was added to the encore, right before the performance of ‘Fifteen’. This marked the live debut of the song. If Taylor had a surprise guest, this was the song she would usually cut from the setlist.

Starting from the show in Perth, Australia on March 2, 2012, ‘Safe & Sound’ (x) was added to the encore. ‘Ours’ (x) was shifted to the acoustic set and was played right before ‘Last Kiss.’ It was only skipped at the show in Auckland on March 17. I’m including a video because, although the performance from the encore was featured in the tour movie, this version takes place on the B-stage and has a different costume (the purple Susan Hilferty dress she wore for half the show lol).

At the shows in Melbourne, Australia on March 12, 2012 and Auckland, New Zealand on March 16, 2012, ‘Fearless’ was skipped.

Surprise covers:

1. ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’ by Bon Jovi - Newark, NJ (July 19, 2011) (x)

2. ‘Dancing in the Dark’ by Bruce Springsteen / ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’ by Bon Jovi - Newark, NJ (July 20 & 24, 2011) (x), (x)

3. ‘Cowboy Take Me Away’ by the Dixie Chicks - Newark, NJ (July 23, 2011) (x)

4. ‘Lose Yourself’ by Eminem and ‘Smile’ by Uncle Kracker’ - Grand Rapids, MI (July 28, 2011) (x)

5. ‘Jack & Diane’ by John Mallencamp and ‘I Want You Back’ by the Jackson 5 - Indianapolis, IN (July 29, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘I Want You Back’ was featured on the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

6. ‘I Try’ by Macy Gray and ‘My Wish’ by the Rascal Flatts - Cleveland, OH (July 30, 2011) (x)

7. ‘I Heard It Through the Grapevine’ by Gladys Knight & the Pips and ‘Ghetto Superstar’ by Mya - Washington, DC (August 2, 2011) (x)

8. ‘Stay (I Missed You)’ by Lisa Loeb and ‘A Sorta Fairytale’ by Tori Amos - Washington, DC (August 3, 2011) (x)

9. ‘Who Knew’ by P!nk and ‘Unpretty’ by TLC - Philadelphia, PA (August 6, 2011) (x)

10. ‘Sugar, We’re Goin Down’ by Fall Out Boy - Rosemont, IL (August 9-10, 2011) (x)

11. ‘Just a Dream’ by Nelly - St Louis, MO (August 13-14, 2011) (x)

12. ‘God Only Knows’ by The Beach Boys and ‘Sweet Escape’ by Gwen Stefani - Los Angeles, CA (August 23-24, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Sweet Escape’ was featured as a bonus track on the Target deluxe version of the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

13. ‘This Love’ by Maroon 5 and Bette Davis Eyes’ by Jackie DeShannon - Los Angeles, CA (August 27, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Bette Davis Eyes’ was featured on the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio.

14. ‘Realize’ by Colbie Caillat’ - Los Angeles, CA (August 28, 2011) (x)

15. ‘Drops of Jupiter’ by Train - San Jose, CA (September 1, 2011) (x)

Note: ‘Drops of Jupiter’ was included in the Speak Now World Tour concert movie. An audio was also featured on the standard CD.

16. ‘Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)’ by Green Day - San Jose, CA (September 2, 2011) (x)

17. ‘Untouchable’ by Luna Halo - Sacramento, CA (September 3, 2011) (x)

18. ‘Closer to Love’ by Matt Kearney - Portland, OR (September 6, 2011) (x)

19. ‘You & Me’ by Dave Matthews Band - Tacoma, WA (September 7, 2011) (x)

20. ‘Nashville’ by David Mead - Nashville, TN (September 16-17, 2011) (x), (x)

Note: ‘Nashville’ was featured as a bonus track on the Target deluxe version of the Speak Now World Tour Live CD. The second link will direct you to the audio. PS: This is one of my favorite covers she’s ever done.

21. ‘Lucky’ by Britney Spears - Bossier City, LA (September 20, 2011) (x)

22. ‘Swing, Swing’ by The All-American Rejects - Tulsa, OK (September 21, 2011) (x)

23. ‘How to Save a Life’ by The Fray - Denver, CO (September 27, 2011) (x)

24. ‘Animal’ by The Neon Trees - Salt Lake City, UT (September 28, 2011) (x)

25. ‘Baby Girl’ by Sugarland - Atlanta, GA (October 1-2, 2011) (x)

26. ‘Ain’t Nothing ‘Bout You’ by Brooks & Dunn - North Little Rock, AR (October 4, 2011) (x)

27. ‘Breathless’ by Better Than Ezra - New Orleans, LA (October 5, 2011) (x)

28. ‘Boys of Summer’ by Don Henley - Dallas, TX (October 8, 2011) (x)

29. ‘The Back of Your Hand’ by Dwight Yoakam - Louisville, KY (October 11, 2011) (x)

30. ‘Wide Open Spaces’ by The Dixie Chicks - Lubbock, TX (October 14, 2011) (x)

31. ‘What Hurts the Most’ by Jeffrey Steele - Oklahoma City, OK (October 15, 2011) (x)

32. ‘Dare You to Move’ by Switchfoot - San Diego, CA (October 20, 2011) (x)

33. ‘No Parade’ by Jordin Sparks - Glendale, AZ (October 21, 2011) (x)

34. ‘You Learn’ by Alanis Morissette, ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber, and ‘She’s So High by Tal Bachman (all played in succession along with ‘You Belong with Me’) - Toronto, Canada (July 15, 2011) (x)

35. ‘Complicated’ by Avril Lavigne, ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber, and ‘I’m Like a Bird’ by Nelly Furtado - Toronto, Canada (July 16, 2011) (x), (x), (x)

Note: She only played excerpts from each song. A full video isn’t available.

36. ‘Complicated’ by Carolyn Dawn Johnson - Edmonton, Canada (August 18, 2011) (x)

37. ‘Summer of 69’ by Bryan Adams - Vancouver, Canada (September 10, 2011) (x)

38. ‘Where Were You (When the World Stopped Turning)’ by Alan Jackson - Vancouver, Canada (September 11, 2011) (x)

39. ‘All You Wanted’ by Michelle Branch - Glendale AZ, (October 22, 2011) & San Antonio, TX (October 25, 2011) (x)

40. ‘Run’ by George Strait - San Antonio, TX (October 26, 2011) (x)

41. ‘Hold On’ by Jack Ingram - Memphis, TN (October 30, 2011) (x) (skip to 21:46; this video includes all the Speak Now Tour covers)

42. ‘Cry Me a River’ by Justin Timberlake - New York, NY (November 21, 2011) (x)

Surprise guests:

1. ‘Baby’ with Justin Bieber - Los Angeles, CA (August 23, 2011) (x)

2. ‘I’m Yours’ with Jason Mraz - Los Angeles, CA (August 24, 2011) (x)

3. ‘Tonight, Tonight’ with Hot Chelle Rae - Los Angeles, CA (August 27, 2011), (x)

4. ‘Super Bass’ with Nicki Minaj - Los Angeles, CA (August 28, 2011) (x)

5. ‘That’s What You Get’ with Hayley Williams - Nashville, TN (September 16, 2011) (x)

6. ‘Bleed Red’ with Ronnie Dunn - Nashville, TN (September 16, 2011) (x)

7. ‘Big Star’ with Kenny Chesney - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

8. ‘Keep Your Head Up’ with Andy Grammer - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

9. ‘Just to See You Smile’ with Tim McGraw - Nashville, TN (September 17, 2011) (x)

10. ‘Yeah!’ with Usher - Atlanta, GA (October 1, 2011) (x)

11. ‘Live Your Life’ with T.I. - Atlanta, GA (October 2, 2011) (x)

12. ‘Meant to Live’ with Jon Foreman - Glendale, AZ (October 21, 2011) (x)

13. ‘She’s So High’ with Tal Bachman - Vancouver, Canada (September 10, 2011) (x)

14. ‘The Middle’ with Jim Adkins - Glendale, AZ (October 22, 2011) (x)

15. ‘Just a Dream’ with Nelly - Houston, TX (November 5, 2011) (x)

16. ‘Right Round’ with Flo Rida - Miami, FL (November 13, 2011) (x)

17. ‘Alright’ with Darius Rucker - Columbia, SC (November 18, 2011) (x)

18. ‘Who Says’ with Selena Gomez - New York, NY (November 22, 2011) (x)

19. ‘Fire and Rain’ and ‘Fifteen’ (part of the regular setlist but performed as a duet here) with James Taylor - New York, NY (November 22, 2011) (x)

Surprise songs.

1. ‘Superman’ - Kansas City, MO (September 24, 2011) (x)

Note: This is the only live performance of ‘Superman’ to date. The video begins with an excerpt of her ‘Last Kiss’ performance, so you’ll have to skip to circa 1:30, but unlike other recordings, it’s complete. This is six minutes of pure joy.

2. ‘Never Grow Up’ - Lexington, KY (October 29, 2011), Houston, TX (November 5, 2011), Raleigh, NC (November 17, 2011) (x)

3. ‘Eyes Open’ - Auckland, New Zealand (March 17, 2012) (x)

Note: This marked the live debut of the song, as it had not even been released at the time of the performance.

[jelenamasterpost]

2012

INDEX: purple font signifies importance, whether that be a specific date, quote, etc - I will later release a full index of all important dates and information combing each year of the Jelena timeline, but in the meantime, purple font signifies key information in their story to later come back to.

January 1st:

Selena celebrated NYE by Justin's side at his private party at the Glass House in NYC following his performance on Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve:

"He...danced with Selena, showing off, picking her up and swinging her around like it was Dancing With the Stars," a source tells E!

*E! article here (x)

January 2nd:

Selena tweets (a now deleted) photo she posted to her instagram of Justin with a big smile captioned:

“This smile is because of Carly Rae Jepsen.. We have not stopped listening to your song girl!” in response to CRJ’s single “Call Me Maybe”

*tweet here (x)

January 3rd:

Selena was spotted getting gas and McDonalds on way to Justin’s house

*photos here (x)

January 4th:

Justin, Selena, Taylor Swift, JoJo and Francia attend The Laugh Factory in Los Angeles

*photos / article here (x) (x)

January 6th:

Justin and Selena are photographed in Los Cabos, Mexico

*photos here (x)

January 7th:

Photos of Justin and Selena in Los Cabos, Mexico

*photos here (x)

January 9th:

Justin adds photo of him and Selena in Los Cabos, Mexico to instagram captioned:

“2 much fun”

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber)

January 10th:

Selena and Justin are photographed arriving at a restaurant together in Hollywood, California

*full article / photos here (x)

January 13th:

Selena and Justin are spotted by fans while walking with Baylor in Balboa Park, California

*full article / photos here (x)

January 14th:

Selena and Justin are spotted and photographed grocery shopping together with some family members in Encino, CA

*photos here (x)

January 15th:

Selena and Justin are photographed arriving at a friends house for Football Sunday

*full article / photos here (x)

January 16th:

Justin and Selena drive to Disney Land and were spotted walking on streets of Anaheim

*photos here (x)

January 17th:

Justin and Selena attend Disneyland together and are spotted kissing - they also run into Selena’s on-screen mom, actress Maria Canals Barrera, who tweeted a photo of herself with Selena and Justin writing “You never know who you’ll bump into at Disney Land.”

*full article / photos here (x) (x) (x)

January 22nd:

Selena continues her We Own The Night World Tour for the final South American leg of the tour this evening in San Juan, Puerto Rico.

The tour runs through January 22nd-February 11th

Fans spot both Selena and Justin in San Juan and take fan photos with the couple - Alfredo later confirms Justin was indeed in Puerto Rico but that they were flying back to LA the following day

Alfredo Flores:

"Went to dinner tonight in Puerto Rico. Justin ended up eating fish… I wanted him to try something Puerto Rican but he really wanted fish.. LOL what a waste of trying. Selena had a great show though and it was awesome seeing all the fans at the arena. I met so many of you and it was so much fun. Last day tomorrow and then we have to fly back to LA. Enjoying my last moments tomorrow. Te Amo."

*photos here (x) / Wikipedia tour dates (x)

February 2nd:

Selena covers the March issue of Cosmo and mentions Justin a few times in her interview

Talking about Justin:

“I’m just like every 19-year-old girl. If you’re in love, you’re in love to the fullest, and you just want to go to the movies, hang out, and be as normal as possible. I’m fortunate that I’ve found someone who has that philosophy … [Love] is the most powerful thing. When it comes to my family, friends, a relationship … it centers me. You only live once, and I want to be proud of everything that I do and just have fun. I want to be able to say that I had a really fulfilled, fun life.”

Talking about Nick, an ex:

“I was in a relationship previously where I had to hide everything and it wasn’t my choice. I had to go through different exits and take separate cars and do the craziest things, and it just really wasn’t worth it. It was like a year of my life completely wasted.”

February 11th:

Selena officially finishes her We Own The Night World Tour as she performs her final show of her South American leg in Montevideo, Uruguay

She also announced via her official Facebook that her and her band Selena Gomez & The Scene would be taking a prolonged hiatus as she will focusing primarily on acting this year:

This tour has been amazing, Thank you all for all the love and support you have shown me on this tour. Today is the last show but.... I will be back. Love you all.

Just to clear up my last instagram post, my band and I are going our separate ways for a while. This year is all about films and acting and I want my band to play music wherever with whoever. We will be back but, it will be a good while. I love them and I love you guys

*Facebook status here (x)

February 12th:

Justin is photographed picking up Selena from LaGuardia Airport in New York, who just finished her South American tour the night prior

They're later photographed together shopping in H&M and again that evening getting dinner at Thai Bistro in Manhattan posing for fan photos

*photos here (x) / here (x) / and here (x)

February 13th:

Justin and Selena are seen arriving at their New York City hotel on the eve of Valentines Day.

Justin gifted Selena a diamond ring for Valentines Day with the letter "J" on it - she uploaded a photo of her hand and the ring to Instagram with the caption:

"I'm finally home :)"

*E! article / photo of ring here (x)

February 14th:

Justin and Selena spend part of their Valentines Day at Disneyland with his whole family and were photographed carrying around his younger siblings.

*full article / photos here (x)

February 15th:

Justin and Selena are spotted at iHop and Chuck E Cheese in Encino, California

*photos here (x) / and here (x)

February 17th:

Justin and Selena were spotted/filmed while out shopping at The Beverly Centre

Justin and Selena later took to the Malibu oceanfront with his younger siblings and were photographed

*beach photos here (x) beverly centre here footage here (x)

February 18th:

Justin and Selena were photographed out as they took his younger siblings, Jaxon and Jazmyn, for a trip to Japanese spot Benihana in Los Angeles.

Stuart Montalvo, general manager of the restaurant, tells HollywoodLife.com:

“Justin and Selena were here this past Saturday with a group of people. They are really nice and polite. They come here quite often and usually order the same thing: Rocky’s Choice, which is Hibachi steak and chicken breast. Justin’s younger brother and sister were also with them. It was a family affair. Everyone was in a great mood and laughing and having fun. Justin and Selena were very affectionate. They were holding hands when they walked in and when they left. They looked like they are very fond of each other.”

Justin and Selena recruit their friend Ashley Tisdale and crew (including Ashley's boyfriend Martin Johnson from Boys Like Girls, Sammy Droke, Mateo Arias, Logan Henderson, Kendall Schmidt and Carlos Pena) to film themselves lip-synching and dancing to Carly Rae Jepsen’s Call Me Maybe in a home-made video

*photos earlier that day here (x)

February 19th:

Taylor Swift films "dance challenge" with Zac Efron on behalf of Ellen's dare at the premiere of The Lorax, and includes footage from the same day of the premiere dancing up on Justin in the studio and Selena at the event

*full article here (x) (x) *full video here (x)

February 22nd:

Justin and Selena went to UNDER THE GUN tattoo parlor in Hollywood to get Selena her first tattoo. Jordan Sandoval tweeted a picture of Selena and Louie, the tattoo artist who tattooed her.

(he is quoted saying its a heart, but its actually a music symbol and has been long speculated to actually be a disguised "J")

“She got a little heart tattoo at Under The Gun, in Hollywood by Louie Gomez @selenagomez.”

Carly Rae Jepsen and Justin hang out in the studio, upload a photo together and announce they've recorded a song via Twitter

Carly's Tweet:

I finally got to say thank you in person. Ps @/kukharrell @/justinbieber and I may have worked on a little song tonight.

Justin's Tweet:

my first impression of @/carlyraejepsen - kind, talented, and the real deal. this is going to be fun. welcome to the team.

*tattoo parlour photos here (x)

February 23rd:

Justin and Selena are photographed as they stop at The Commons at Calabasas in Calabasas, California - they later stopped for coffee at Starbucks and frozen yogurt at Menchie’s with their entourage, and Justin debuts his dyed brunette hair.

*full article / photos here (x)

February 25th:

Justin and Selena are photographed having lunch together at Sushi Den then again as they head into the Sherman Oaks Galleria to catch an afternoon movie together in Sherman Oaks, Calif.

Justin adds a photo of him and Selena to his Instagram

Later that evening while grabbing dinner they met Richard Reid in an elevator and stopped to pose for a photo with him that Richard ended up posting to his Twitter - after being flooded with questions from Justin fans, he began answering a few, revealing publicly via Twitter that there was boob grabbing (?)

*photos from earlier in the day here (x) Richard Reid photo here (x) Richard Reid tweet here (x)

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A post shared by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber)

February 26th:

Justin and Selena are photographed by fans renting movies at a Hollywood Blockbuster

Selena speaks to Access Hollywood about her new diamond studded ring in the shape of a "J" from Justin and whether or not its an engagement ring. When asked to show off the jewelry, she suddenly came down with a sudden case of stage fright:

“No, no — that’s like almost a friendship ring, it’s just for fun.”

“No! You’ll see it in pictures!”

“I get nervous.” she added with a laugh.

*blockbuster photos here (x) / AccessHollywood article here (x)

February 27th:

Selena officially begins filming Spring Breakers in St. Petersburg Florida alongside Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Benson

February 29th:

Justin films his appearance for The Ellen DeGeneres Show (that airs the following day) to reveal that the first single from his upcoming album, Believe, was called Boyfriend and would be released March 26th - while filming, he's surprised and gifted an electric car from his manager Scooter Braun for his birthday

*full article here (x)

March 1st:

Selena adds photo to instgram for Justin’s birthday captioned:

Happy birthday to my best friend in the whole world!!! Have a great birthday baby!

March 2nd:

Selena is photographed leaving a medical clinic after getting bloodwork while still in St. Petersburg Florida

She's later seen arriving into LAX, having flown in for Justin's birthday party

Justin’s birthday party is this evening and Carly Rae Jepsen performs - Selena, their mutual agent Nick Styne, Jaden Smith, Ashley Tisdale, Ryan Good, Tori Kelly, Alfredo, Ashley Cook and Samantha Droke are also in attendance

*Medical Clinic article here (x) / DailyMail article here (x) / JustJared photos (x)

March 5th:

Its been reported that Justin is buying a $10.8million property in the Hollywood Hills to set up for himself and Selena

*DailyMail article here (x)

March 11th:

Justin flies down to Florida and takes Selena, Ashley Benson and her boyfriend Ryan Good, Justin's mom and his grandparents for a fishing trip excursion.

They are later spotted by fans at Gratzzi Italian Grille and Cracker Barrel before ending up back at their hotel.

Justin tweeted:

"great day fishing. time with grandpa doing the simple things in life. great day."

"Show the ones you love you love them. Take the time to make sure they know,"

*DailyMail article here (x) more photos here (x)

March 12th:

Justin visits Selena on the set of Spring Breakers

Later that evening, they meet up for dinner and drinks at a sports bar with Ashley Benson and Ryan Good in St. Petersburg Florida and have their first public fight - shortly after arriving Justin stormed out of the bar, followed by Selena chasing after him to their car.

“Justin’s security team drove the battling couple down the street to an alley where they had a ‘private conversation.’ After settling their dispute, they went back to the bar and continued boozing it up. By the time they left it was clear that the underage couple appeared to have had too much alcohol to drink.”

They were later photographed leaving the restaurant seeming to have made amends, but were reported to have been intoxicated.

*full article detailing fight here (x) *justin visiting set photos here (x)

March 13th:

Justin is photographed arriving back into LAX from Florida

March 15th:

Selena, Justin and her family are photographed leaving Cedars Sinai Medical Office Towers in Los Angeles California - Selena had a bandage around her arm where it looked like she had blood taken.

Upon getting in the car, Justin laid down in the seat so he wouldn't be seen by the camera.

*full article here (x)

March 16th:

Justin is photographed at Cedars-Sinai Medical Centre waiting outside in his vehicle and allegedly is there with Selena - she was also there the day before getting blood work

*full article / photos here (x)

March 26th:

Justin does a radio interview with Ryan Seacrest on KIIS-FM explained how he tries to stay busy while Selena is away filming her movie:

“I work all day, it keeps me occupied.”

March 30th:

Justin sits down with Complex and talks about Selena and growing up in the game:

Complex: Obviously, you and Selena are fodder for the gossip blogs everyday. How hard is it to keep your relationship private?

JB: It’s so hard, because everyone’s got a camera-phone, and now everyone wants to get their picture on the blogs. So they’ll send anything that they have to the blogs. So you don’t really get any privacy. If I want to go out to eat, if I’m in L.A., I just have to expect that there’s going to be someone there. That’s the only thing that I don’t like.

Complex: Is it tough for you guys? A lot of people like, hate it. Do you guys hate it, or is it like, “This comes with the territory, we’ve got to deal with it, it sucks?”

JB: I’m kind of both. I don’t like it, but I understand it. I’ll be covering my face or something, and the comment that pisses me off so much is, “Oh, get over it, Justin. You’re famous. People are going to take your picture. Just suck it up. You’re rich. You’re making a lot of money. Suck it up. This is one of the things that you have to do.” I’m like, “Yo I just got off an eight-hour flight. I’m tired. My eyes have bags under them. I’m not trying to take pictures.” I’m not going to come to your house, wake you up out of a deep sleep and start snapping your picture, no matter how you look right now. It doesn’t matter. When I get off a flight, I’m not trying to sit there and let them take pictures of me. I’m tired. I’m scratching my eyes. I just don’t like taking pictures in general.

Complex: There’s been high profile couples in history: Justin and Britney, Jay and Beyoncé. Jay and Beyoncé kind of kept it private. Everyone knew they were together, but they kept it quiet. Even with the kid, they kept it so under wraps. Do you learn anything from those relationships? And do you guys talk about that?

JB: Yeah. I mean, for me, it’s like, there’s no way to hide it completely, because then it would be unfair for us. Then, we’re not even able to have a relationship. It’s like, “You take this car, and I’ll take this car, and then we’ll meet up at the spot. Then, you go in this door, I’ll go in this door. We’ll end up crossing ways. You get back in this car. We’ll cross over, do a James Bond. You go through the kitchen. I’ll go through the back area. Then we’ll meet in the dressing room and see each other.” At that point, it’s like, it’s not even a relationship. You’re just hiding from everyone. That’s unfair and unhealthy, man.

*full Complex article here (x)

March 31st:

Justin and Selena both attend The Kids Choice Awards though walk the red carpet separately - Justin gets slimed during the ceremony and they both win awards

(note to self: Selena seems a bit high during interviews backstage)

April 4th:

Selena and Justin are photographed having a Subway picnic overlooking the city at Griffith Park in Los Angeles.

*full article / photos here (x)

April 5th:

Justin and Selena held hands as they headed to Panera Bread for lunch in Glendale, California

*DailyMail article / photos here (x)

April 6th:

Justin and Selena were photographed getting food at the Chick-fil-A drive-thru

*full article / photos here (x)

April 7th:

Justin and Selena were spotted by fans at a grocery store and posed for photos

*photos here (x)

April 9th:

Justin, Selena and Alfredo are spotted/photographed by fans while going to watch American Reunions in theatres

*photos here (x)

April 11th:

Seventeen Magazine releases their May issue with Justin on the cover and ask about Selena during his interview:

Seventeen: Everyone is so interested in your personal life, especially your relationship with Selena. A lot of your fans don’t approve…

Justin: Everyone has haters, so you always have to deal with the negativity and be positive about it. I don’t think it’s nice; I’d rather they be nice, but at the end of the day I don’t let it affect me.

Seventeen: You’ve planned some amazing dates for Selena - who taught you to be so romantic?

Justin: I’m just trying to make her happy, that’s all. I think it’s important to make all woman feel like they’re princesses because every girl is a princess, I’m serious.

Seventeen: Will.I.am said he thinks it’s important for people to experience heartbreak so they’ll have something to sing about. What do you think?

Justin: I haven’t gone through it so I don’t really know what it’s about. I don’t think anyone wants to have heartbreak. I haven’t been in that deep a place yet, but I’m still looking. I’m still learning every day.

Seventeen: Would you and Selena ever record music together?

Justin: Yeah. I love her music, so maybe we could collaborate.

*full article here (x)

April 12:

Justin, Selena and Alfredo are photographed snowboarding at Big Bear Ski Resort in Big Bear Lake, California

*photos here (x)

April 14th:

Justin and Selena go to Jupiter, Florida for the weekend to celebrate the wedding of one of Justin’s friends and check into The Inn at Admiral’s Cove

They later attend Allison Kaye's wedding

*full article here (x)

April 17th:

Justin and Selena attend Lakers game together after both separately appearing on DWTS and American Idol, and publicly share an intimate kiss when put on the spot via the events Kiss Cam

April 19th:

During an interview with The Insider to promote her new perfume line, Selena is put to the test to correctly guess Justin's perfume through a sniff-test:

"The Insider's Brooke Anderson lined up three unlabeled fragrances for Selena, which included Justin's Someday perfume, challenging her to pick out his scent from the trio.

"I'm such a bad girlfriend," Selena sheepishly muttered when she confused Someday for Paris.

Selena revealed that Justin is impressed with her concoction and went on to explain why his opinion carried so much weight when she was creating the scent for her perfume, not only as a fellow perfumer, but also as a guy, citing "romantic" reasons."

*full video here (x)

April 20th:

Selena debuts a new additional music video for Hit The Lights

Selena appears on On Air with Ryan Seacrest and opens up about her Kiss Cam at the Lakers game earlier this week, and Justin’s upcoming debut with Taylor Swift.

Asked about the Kiss Cam, Selena called it "the most humiliating thing that’s ever happened to me, probably."

“They were showing these little elderly couples, and it was so cute. Then all of a sudden we’re both looking up and we come on the screen and it’s like … it was so awkward. It was so weird. I mean you have to kiss, right?”

"They wrote a song together and it’s beautiful - it’s amazing - I don’t know if it will make the album, but if not I’m sure they’ll release it at some point, because it’s a really great record. It’s kind of like … it’s Taylor and Justin combined. So it’s a little bit of an upbeat song, but it’s very acoustic.”

*full video interview here (x) / *full RadarOnline article here (x)

April 21st:

Selena visits Justin on set for his music video “Boyfriend” and the two are photographed hugging/kissing/being affectionate

*full article / photos here (x)

April 27th:

UsWeekly releases a special edition of their magazine featuring Justin and exclusive photos/interviews titled Inside My World: Justin Bieber. He's questioned about Selena during his interview and mentions recently gifting her a diamond bracelet:

UsWeekly: At least you get quality time with Selena. What do you love about her?

Justin: I dunno! She just carries herself in a very elegant way. And my family loves her, which is usually hard because my mom’s really picky. My mom wants, you know, a good Christian girl with good manners.

UsWeekly: Do you understand girls better now?

Justin: Well, every girl is different, so they are hard to figure out. Like, the way most men work is the same. But each woman works differently. It’s like I can’t figure them out! But I do know girls like you to tell them you love them and that they’re all beautiful all the time. So I do that a lot with any girl I’m with. I tell them that as much as possible.

UsWeekly: Most romantic gift you’ve ever given?

Justin: I’m not saying to who- but I gave a girl an expensive diamond bracelet recently. It was so pretty, I knew she’d love it!

UsWeekly: Would you and Selena ever do a duet?Yeah. I think she’s very talented.

Justin: That would be very cool. We have nothing planned- but I’m not opposed to it!

*full interview here (x)

May 16th:

Justin featured in GQ magazine/interview:

"I keep my guard up a lot," the singer says in the latest issue of GQ.

"Because you know, you can’t trust anyone in this business. That’s what’s sad. You can’t trust anybody. I learned the hard way.”

May 18th:

The Hollywood Gossip reports that Justin and Selena may have broken up after Justin cryptically tweets/deletes:

“thank u for the time i had with you but i have to move on now..”

*full article here (x)

May 20th:

Justin attends Billboard Music Awards solo in Las Vegas

May 20th:

Justin sits down with Sunday Times for an interview and reveals when news of his “love child” with Mariah Yeater broke, Selena called him right away. Justin also revealed that he wrote a song dedicated to Selena titled 'Be Alright.'

“She was like, ‘Do you see what they’re saying on the internet?’ I was like ‘Yeah.’ She was, like, ‘So…’ I was, like ‘No, it’s not true’. ‘Okay, thank you, bye!’ That was it, she trusts me."

“I’m going to call my girlfriend.” So he does, reaching Selena on the Florida set of her new film Spring Breakers.

“Whats up baby? I can’t stop thinking about you… I said I can’t stop thinking about you. That’s all. Yes, so, um, I gotta do this interview but I just wanted to call and hear your voice really quickly… Okay, I love you. Okay bye.”

Skype and FaceTime keep them connected, he says.

“Ten years ago, or even five years, long distance relationships were much harder. Now you see each other anytime you want!”

May 25th:

Justin and Selena reunite as he picks her up from the LAX airport

*full article (x) / photos (x)

May 26th:

Selena and Justin are photographed out for a lunch date at Benihana in Sherman Oaks. Afterwards the two snuck out the back door hand-in-hand. Selena then went her own way as she cruised to a nearby 76 gas station in Encino to fill her Ford Escape

*photos here (x)

May 27th:

Selena and Justin were strolling an outdoor mall in Calabasas when paparazzi began harassing them as they were trying to leave. According to witnesses (and photos taken) this photographer was so aggressive that he even blocked Justin's car, and was said to be rudely harassing Selena "about the herpes (coldsore) on her lip" while trying to capture a photo of her. After they began harassing Selena, Justin got out of his car and went to smack the camera from his hands and him and the photographer both fell off the curb.

The photographer was taken away by ambulance AND filed a police report that named Justin as the culprit. The Los Angles County Sheriff's office is investigating and say they will talk to Justin.

One of the girls who supposedly was there shared this:

"long story short; the paps were blocking his car and wouldnt move, he got mad after asking them to move, justin tried to knock their camera, the pap and justin both fell off the curb, he lost his shoe and hat while fighting him, selena and justin left and came back because selena lost her phone, and the paps would not get out of her face, and then they left and now the paps are trying to get money from the whole thing"

Another girl that was allegedly there as a witness had nearly the exact same story as above, except in addition she added the paparazzi were rudely asking Selena "about the herpes on her lip," and that's when and why Justin knocked his camera.

*full video to story above here (x)

May 28th:

Selena attends producer Joel Silver‘s Memorial Day party in Malibu

Selena and Justin have dinner date

*full article / photos here (x)

May 30th:

Detectives want to interview Justin and Selena after a photographer claims he was attacked by Justin at a Calabasas shopping mall Sunday, but authorities continue to seek additional witnesses.

In a statement released Tuesday, the Sheriff's Department said the investigation was continuing and that detectives "are planning to interview Mr. Bieber." Law enforcement sources said Selena is among the witnesses detectives would like to talk to. Detectives are investigating claims by the photographer that Justin struck him after he snapped photographs of Selena at the Commons at Calabasas Shopping Center.

The photographer complained of pain and was taken by the Los Angeles County Fire Department to a hospital, where he was treated and released, officials said. The sources, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because the investigation was ongoing, stressed that the probe was in its early stages.

*source here (x)

June 7th:

Selena’s photoshoot and interview for her Elle cover is released where she briefly mentions Justin renting out LA's Staples Center for a private screening of Titanic:

"If I'll share anything with you, it's that he really is a hopeless romantic. I had just mentioned it in the car - all I said is that I really want to see Titanic again, and then."

June 11th:

Justin joined Selena's mom and step-dad at the Right to Laugh event hosted by the Alliance for Children's Rights at the Avalon in Hollywood. Selena's mom Mandy, a huge supporter of the organization, purchased an entire table to support the cause, and invited Justin to accompany her family.

"Selena and Justin sat side-by-side," a source tells PEOPLE.

"They were laughing and smiling the whole evening. They were being very low-key and gracious as to not take away any attention from the cause."

June 15th:

Justin officially releases his third studio album Believe and many of the album's songs are inspired by Selena and their relationship, including Be Alright, a song about their long distance relationship, that Justin wrote by himself:

Across the ocean, across the sea

Startin' to forget the way you look at me now

Over the mountains, across the sky

Need to see your face and need to look in your eyes

Through the storm and, through the clouds

Bumps on the road and upside down now

I know it's hard baby, to sleep at night

Don't you worry

Selena is referenced by name in the song Beauty & A Beat during Nicki Minaj's rap:

“Justin Bieber / You know I'm gonna hit 'em with the ether / Buns out, wiener/ But I gotta keep an eye out for Selener”

*Be Alright audio here (x)

June 15th:

Selena arrives into Toronto Pearson International airport and Justin is photographed picking her up.

*photos here (x) / (x)

June 16th:

Selena and Justin are photographed boarding a helicopter to fly them into his hometown Stratford Ontario where Justin later sang Baby on steps of the Avon Theatre

*full articles (x)

June 17th:

Justin and Selena both attend Much Music Video Awards ceremony in Toronto, Canada where Justin was performing and Selena was presenting - they walked the red carpet separately and didn't pose for any photos together

*photos here (x)

June 25th:

Justin and Selena have dinner date at Geoffrey’s in Malibu and are later seen departing in Justin’s "party bus"

*photos here (x)

June 26th:

Justin and Selena attend Katy Perry’s “Part of Me” documentary premiere at Chateau Marmont in Los Angeles - Justin skipped the red carpet

Later that evening Justin and Selena arrive at the Bootsy Bellows lounge with Katy Perry and Robert Pattinson in West Hollywood for the after party and headed to a private room in the back of the lounge:

“Justin and Selena shared a table with friends,” a spywitness tells JustJared.com of the after-party.

“They were very affectionate the whole night, holding hands and sharing kisses. Katy and Amber Heard, and Shannon Woodward spent a good portion of the night sitting and chatting with them. Everyone was laughing and having a great time, taking pictures with each other and snacking on mini-cupcakes.”

*full article / photos here (x)

June 28th:

Justin cut short a pre-taped interview with U.S. radio show Mojo in the Morning after the host compared him to Justin Timberlake and quizzed him about a potential romance between his mother and One Direction's Harry Styles.

Thomas Carballo, the host of the show, was in the middle of a phone chat with Justin when he (rightfully so) took offence at his line of questioning - and hung up.

The 10-minute interview got off to a bad start when Carballo told Justin he thought he was Timberlake the first time he heard him.

Justin said, "That's funny because our voices sound nothing alike... Saying I sound like somebody else is definitely not a compliment."

Justin eased up when talking about his new song Maria, which was inspired by the woman who falsely claimed he was the father of her baby last year, but he lost his cool when Carballo got personal and asked if he was worried about Harry Styles falling for his mum.

The DJ said, "Do you worry about Harry around your mum, since he likes older women?"

Clearly upset, Justin then mumbled something about Carballo's mother and, as the radio presenter explained his mum was dead, Justin had already hung up the phone.

A record company representative then tried to convince the DJ that Justin's phone had cut off, explaining, "I can't get him. He's in a really s**tty area."

She later revealed Justin was "really upset" with the questions, adding, "He probably won't be calling back."

*source here (x)

June 30th:

Justin and Selena enjoy a walk around Lake Balboa in Van Nuys, California, stopped at an ice cream truck with Alfredo and stopped by Bronco Burrito for some lunch.

*full article / photos here (x)

[the-bau-quinjet]

But with you, it’s different...

So, I’ve combined two of my great obsessions: Criminal Minds and Taylor Swift. Pretend the reader is Taylor Swift in the sense that she wrote and recorded the songs, but that’s it. Also, the songs are all out of order and not from the albums so just pretend that’s okay. I don’t reference the albums, but individual songs and yeah. It’s honestly kind of a mess, but also makes me happy. This is part 1! I have most of it written, so I should be able to post the other parts pretty soon. I think there will be 3 actual parts and then a short epilogue! Last thing, Spencer is a little out of character. I (try to) explain that later!!

Summary: Reader is a famous singer with a murderous stalker. Spencer has to go undercover to protect her. 

warnings: mentions of murder, anxious reader

Word Count: 7940

You weren’t expecting anything out of the ordinary to happen tonight. It was just the usual Saturday night. Honestly, you were looking forward to having a boring two weeks off. You absolutely loved touring and performing and seeing your fans, but it was going to be great to have some time just to write again. Writing music has always helped you de-stress and get your emotions out, and you were supposed to finally have a chance to do just that. However, the universe had different plans. Plans that involved the FBI.

This was your second night in DC. It was the first of some of the bigger cities on your tour where you were doing two shows, so you are even more exhausted than normal. You really only just started the US leg of your tour, but the two weeks off was well earned from the Europe, Asia, and South America legs.

 As you begin to perform the second to last song, you start to feel the familiar sadness you get when finishing a show. It’s almost as though the adrenaline rush from the excitement of so many screaming fans is wearing off and you can’t help but feel a bit sorry that the fun is coming to an end. After so many performances though, you’ve learned how to hide the emotions and give the audience your best fake smile. The last song is where you have some real fun, so just make it there.

 As you duck off stage to change for the final performance, you can’t help but notice the small group of people conversing, quite tensely, with your security team. They don’t look like the normal fans who would try to sneak backstage, too official. You make eye contact with one of them. He looks to be about your age, but you’ve never been great at guessing. There’s something about him that makes you want to find out exactly who he is right now, but you can’t. 

You’re left wondering about his identity as you run back onstage for the grand finale. You feel a genuine smile appearing as you feel the heat from the fireworks and listen to the happy cheers from the crowd. You’re last song goes off without a hitch, but you’re exhausted. There’s nothing you want more than to just shower and sleep, but there’s always a buzz about the cast and crew that prevents anyone from leaving right away.

 “Thank you for a great second night DC! Goodnight!” You shout into the mic as you duck back offstage to ride out the post show high. You are still chatting with some of the dancers you’ve become friends with when Carrie, the head of security, comes up with one of the men you saw arguing with her earlier.

 “Y/N? Can I talk to you for a minute?” You turn, surprised to see the stern man standing behind Carrie. “Yeah, sure.” You turn to excuse yourself from the dancers, wishing them a goodnight before turning back to Carrie.

 “We can go do your dressing room, that’s where the others are waiting.” Carrie says with a nervous smile on her face.

 “The others?” You ask confused, jogging to keep up with the brisk pace she has set for you and the stern man. “Who are we talking to?”

 “I’m sure you have a lot of questions. We will explain everything as soon as we meet up with the rest of the team.” The stern man spoke quietly, but with confidence as he followed behind you and Carrie. Before you could ask anything else, you were being ushered into your dressing room, coming face to face with the other two people you saw arguing with Carrie earlier. The first one you notice is a woman with jet black hair and fierce eyes. The other is the tall, lanky man you made eye contact with.

 You’re a little excited to get a closer look. He looks a little awkward at first glance, but you can tell he’s a sneaky sort of attractive underneath the perfectly placed tie and the comfy cardigan. Before you can get too caught up in how good looking these three strangers are, you turn to the stern one and ask “Who are you, and what are you doing here?” Your tone clearly indicates the confusion you’re feeling. 

 “Ms. L/N, my name is Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner. I am the Unit Chief for the Behavioral Analysis Unit at the FBI.” You can feel your eyes go wide as he shows you a badge with his picture and title. Before you can respond, he begins talking again. “These are SSAs Emily Prentiss” the woman gives you a reassuring smile and slight wave, “and Dr. Spencer Reid.” The sneakily attractive one nods his head in your general direction.

 The woman just introduced as Emily chimes in “we are here because we believe there is a killer targeting fans of your music. We have been tracking murders for the past two weekends. The first was in Louisville, Kentucky, then Columbus, Ohio, and then two right here in D.C.”

 “I was just in Louisville… and Columbus.” You feel yourself beginning to get dizzy as you try to comprehend what the agents are telling you.

 “Yes, and now you’re in DC.” The boss man is talking again. “We made the connection this afternoon as you had two shows here in DC.” The room is starting to spin as you listen to the man talk. “After more digging, we found each victim had purchased a ticket to your show. Additionally, they all had social media accounts dedicated as fan pages to you.” Agent Hotchner continues speaking as you nod along, trying to comprehend how this was happening. You don’t even realize you are tuning him out as you begin to sway on your feet. You can see his mouth moving, and the growing look of concern on his face is the last thing you see before the world goes dark.

 --

 You can hear a faint beeping as you begin to wake up. For a moment, you are blissfully unaware of the murders before the memory of meeting the three agents comes back to you. You instantly sit up and look around, trying to figure out where you are. You can see a very muscular bald man through a window, talking to someone in scrubs.

 Scrubs. A nurse. You are in the hospital.

 Your heart rate begins to calm down before skyrocketing again when you hear “Ms. L/N?” from the other side of the room. Turning with wide eyes and a scared expression, you throw your arms up to defend yourself from the unknown voice.

 “Sorry! Sorry, uh- I didn’t mean to scare you! I’m Dr. Spencer Reid.” Instantly you relax again at the familiar face. You drop your arms back to the bed, shifting into a more comfortable position before asking “Okay, Doctor. What’s wrong with me? Why am I in the hospital?”

He looks at you with a sheepish expression, rubbing the back of his neck before he admits, “Oh, I’m not that kind of doctor. I’ll go get a nurse or someone. Try to think back on what you remember before waking up here.” He shuffles out of the room as you try to replay the conversation with the other agents.

 Well, it wasn’t much of a conversation with them doing all of the talking, but still. The unknown man from outside your room window and the nurse he was talking to come into the room with Dr. Reid. The nurse begins checking your vitals as she asks you some questions.

 “Hi there. It’s good to see you up. How are you feeling?” She wears a small smile.

 “Oh, um, I feel fine. I think. I’m just confused about how I ended up here. I remember talking to the agents at the arena, but that’s it.” You close your eyes as you try to remember more, but nothing comes to you.

 “That was only about 45 minutes ago, dear.” The nurse’s kind voice helps settle you. “You fainted while the agents were talking to you. They brought you here. You should be good to leave in a few minutes as long as your vitals are good.”

 “Thank you.” You return her kind smile as she marks information on your chart before leaving the room.

 “Ms. L/N, this is SSA Derek Morgan.” The Doctor Agent is talking again.

 “Please, call me Y/N.” You rub your head, continuing to try to remember more about your condition. Before either man in the room can speak up, a new thought occurs to you. “If I fainted, why doesn’t my head hurt? The floor in my dressing room is not soft.” You look between the two men for an explanation.  

 The doctor shifts his weight from foot to foot a blush appearing on his face as Agent Morgan speaks up. “That is because Pretty Boy over here” he claps a hand onto the doctor’s shoulder “caught you before you hit the ground.” “Oh, um… Thank you.” You can feel the blush beginning to form as you think about his arms being around you.

 “It was no problem, really. Can we ask you a few questions?” He moves on quickly. “Oh sure thing Dr. Reid. Or Agent Reid. Agent Dr. Reid?” You can feel the blush growing as you ramble.

 “Just Sp-Spencer is fine.” He cuts you off before you can continue suggesting different honorifics. “What do you remember from what Agent Hotchner was telling you?”

 “He said someone was mur-murdering fans of me.” Tears spring to your eyes as you think about it. “That someone was killed in Kentucky and Ohio and then two people here in DC.” You squeeze your eyes shut, willing the tears not to fall.

 Get a hold of yourself.

 You feel a new weight on your hand before hearing Spencer begin talking again. “Take your time.” You open your eyes to see him patting your hand delicately. He moves back after you take a few deep, calming breaths.

 “I’m sorry. I just feel awful knowing people are dy-dying because of me. Is there anything I can do to help?” You choke on the words a bit, realizing the full gravity of the situation.

 “Do you recognize any of these people?” Agent Morgan pulls out photos of three women and one man, handing them to you to sift through. He seems to be staring at Spencer, but you just focus on the pictures. You can feel the tears building again as you realize who they are.

 “I do.” You take another breath before continuing. “I haven’t met them before, but they are all really active on different social sites. I try to talk to as many fans as I can ya know? They are why I am where I am. Is that why they were killed? Oh god. No no no no.” Your breathe increases in speed as you think about everything that is happening.

 “Hey, hey, hey, none of this is your fault.” Spencer is patting your hand again as he tries to calm you down. Just then, the nurse comes back with some paperwork for you to sign in order to leave.

 “You are free to go Ms. L/N. Just sign these forms and hand them in at the desk on your way out.” She exits the room swiftly.

 “Would you mind coming back to our office to finish talking?” Agent Morgan asks.

 “Of course not. Anything I can do to help.” You turn in the forms before following them to a black SUV. Spencer opens the door for you to get in the back before he slides in next to you. You don’t even have the brain power to consider why he isn’t sitting in the front. You just grab his hand and squeeze it, unable to get the thoughts out of your head that this was all your fault.  

 “This is not your fault. You had no idea what was happening, and now that you do you are trying to help.” Spencer looks at you reassuringly as he squeezes your hand right back. You simply nod back. You don’t trust yourself to speak without crying. You just need to calm down before you get to the office.

 About 15 minutes later you pull up to the FBI building that houses the BAU. They must’ve brought you to a hospital near Quantico. They lead you through security up to the fifth floor. You walk through a set of glass doors, passing a few desks before entering a conference room. “Do you need anything? Coffee, water?” Spencer asks as Agent Morgan leaves the room.

 “Oh, um, no I’m okay for now.” You stare at your hands as you go to sit down. “Actually, could I get a jacket or something?” You gesture to what you’re wearing as you ask. You haven’t had a chance to change yet, meaning you are wearing a black, sequined romper that is basically a leotard with how short it is. Perfect for performing, but not exactly FBI attire. “Of co-course! I’ll be right back.” He practically runs out of the room.

 A few minutes later, he pushes the door back open. “Here’s some clothes you can change into if you want. Or just a sweatshirt.” You look up from your position in the chair, rising to take the clothes.

 “Thank you.” You look from the clothes to him realizing you need to change, but are in a room full of windows in an unfamiliar building.

 He catches on a few seconds later, leading you out of the room. “The bathroom is this way!” He squeaks out as you both walk down a hallway outside the glass doors you came in. “I’ll wait here to show you back.” You smile as you brush past him, whispering thank you as you close the door.

 You instantly take off the romper, sliding on some FBI sweatpants and a matching sweatshirt that smells like vanilla and new books. The scent is oddly comforting. You would think a standard FBI sweatshirt would smell new, but this scent is calming your nerves. You fix your makeup as best you can before heading out of the bathroom. Spencer is a few feet away talking to a beautiful blonde woman. She looks effortlessly gorgeous. She smiles as she notices you, waving you to join them.

 “Ms. L/N, it’s lovely to meet you, although I do wish it was under better circumstances. I am SSA Jennifer Jureau, but you can call me JJ. The rest of the team is waiting for us to join them.” She smiles kindly, but you are frozen in place. You feel like a deer caught in the headlights.

 Spencer grabs your arm lightly, pulling you out of your trance. “It’s okay. Just breathe.” He whispers as the three of you start walking back toward the conference room you were in earlier.

 He lets your arm fall back to your side before guiding you back into the room behind JJ. You freeze again upon entering the room. You recognize Agents Hotchner, Prentiss, and Morgan, but are surprised by the other two faces. There is an older man with salt and pepper hair smiling kindly at you. He reminds you of your father. Then there is a very bubbly blonde, in a very colorful dress and matching glasses.

 They introduce themselves as SSA David Rossi and technical analyst Penelope Garcia. The unit chief begins to describe the case again, going slower this time given your earlier episode. “We believe the unsub is targeting fans of yours who he believes is unworthy of your attention. He worships you and views his victims as people who are not devoted enough to you.”

 You can’t decide how to respond, so you wait for another agent to continue. “Do you know of anyone who might be overly obsessed with you? Maybe they sent you letters that were a bit more personal than normal?” At this point, you decide you are done being controlled by this situation. What happened to those people is awful, but you can’t change it. You need to be strong to help prevent it from happening to anyone else.

 “I haven’t finished my fan letters from this week yet. I try to go through as many as possible, but there is only so much time in a day.” At this point you are pacing. Walking around has always helped you with thinking things over. “There is one letter that sticks out from three weeks ago. That was before the murd-” you stutter on the word. “Before anything happened though. Could that be relevant?” You ask, looking hopeful. If the agents are surprised by your change of attitude they don’t mention it.

 “It might be. What did it say?” Agent Hotchner asks, the same stern expression adorning his features.

 “I don’t remember all of it, but it looked like it was written on a typewriter, so it stood out. It said something about how they wondered if my hair smelled like peaches after I finished a show. I thought it was weird because my shampoo is peach scented, but how could they possibly know that? I figured I must have met them in passing, you know. I meet a lot of fans just walking around the different cities. Something just felt weird about this letter though. Like a bad feeling. I mean, my hair doesn’t really retain the scent of my shampoo all that much. So how could he know that unless he knew what shampoo I use? But actually, I use a personalized shampoo so I can change the scent every time I but it- it must’ve been a lucky guess, right? Maybe I just look like I would use peach scented shampoo” You feel like you are talking a mile a minute, but you can’t get yourself to stop. You practically fall back into your chair as you finish rambling about the letter, looking up to see unmistakable expressions of concern on the agents’ faces.

 “What? What does that mean? Oh god- How does he know my shampoo smells like peaches?” You look between all the agents as they seem to be communicating with just their eyes. You resort to taking calming breaths again. They’ll fill you in eventually, you need to breathe. You drop your head between your thighs as you push your chair away from the table. Breathe in for 7 seconds, hold for 7, and breathe out for 7. This always helps calm you down before a show.

 You choose to ignore the agents quietly talking to each other again as you focus on slowing your heart rate back to a normal pace.

 “Ms. L/N?” You look up exasperatedly, “Please, just call me Y/N.”

 “Then you can call me Penelope!” The woman has such a kindness to her that you can’t help but smile back at her.

 “What can I do for you Penelope?” She seems a bit surprised, but she responds in kind.

 “I just wanted to ask if you wanted some coffee. Or water or anything?” You smile at her kind gesture, rising from your seat.

 “Actually, some tea would be wonderful. But, please, let me come help you. These guys seem like they need to talk and it would probably be easier if I wasn’t in the room.” You smile as you walk out the door, leaving the agents slightly stunned at your observational skills in your distressed state.

 Penelope follows you out and leads you to what you assume is the break room. “We don’t really have much tea, but I know where the good doctor keeps his private collection.” She whispers conspiratorially as she searches through a small cabinet. “Aha! Here it is.” She presents you with a pretty impressive collection of teas. You opt for the simple peppermint. You have always found peppermint tea the most soothing.

 She hands you a mug before gesturing to the Keurig on the counter. You place the teabag in the cup, selecting the largest cup on the machine, and brewing hot water for your tea. The two of you don’t say anything while it steeps. Penelope speaks up when you move to sit down at the small table.

 “I just have to say, I am a huge fan of yours.” You can’t hide the smile that forms on your face. You have always loved meeting fans. They are just so sweet and you appreciate them beyond belief.

 “Thank you so much!” She seems a bit relieved at your response. “That’s honestly so nice to hear right now. I kind of feel like a mess.” You gesture to the oversized clothes you’ve got on.

 “Please, you look so gorgeous right now. It’s amazing. Your music is amazing too. I absolutely love Begin Again! It’s so romantic!” She gushes over the song.

 “Honestly, that one took me forever to write. I was in a pretty bad place after a bad breakup, convinced I would never love again. Dramatic, I know.” You roll your eyes at yourself. “But then I saw these two people in a café, and they just looked so happy. The idea of a new love forming so casually right in front of me was beautiful.” You smile thinking about the couple, wondering if they are still together.

 “Wow, so you can really right about anything?” She looks while asking the question.

 “Pretty much. I mean, they won’t all be good. It could be the tiniest moment or a huge thing in my life. Inspiration comes from everywhere. A lot of songs actually draw from multiple experiences, not just one thing. I could totally see myself writing a song about you.”

“No way! That would be insane.” You smile at her enthusiasm.

 “I’m serious! You just give of this energy that is so positive, it’s hard to remember ever being sad. I think it would be about how confident you are. Something like…” you trail off as you begin to hum, setting up your phone to record. “You’re the only one of you, baby that’s the fun of you. And I promise that nobody’s gonna love you like me!” You hum a few more bars before ending the recording.

 “That was insane. How do you do that?!” She has a wild kind of excitement in her eyes.

 “I don’t know. You just inspired me.” You grin at the shocked expression in her eyes.

 “Sing it again!” And you can’t help but give her what she wants.

 You hum a bit more of a melody that could work before jumping into the words you already said. You add a few more here and there, but nothing concrete. In your focus on singing, you don’t hear the door open behind you.

 “I’m the only one of me, baby that’s the fun of me. Oh oh oh. You’re the only one of you, baby that’s the fun of you. And I promise that you’ll never find another like me.” “I don’t doubt it.” You turn in shock to look at the person behind you, seeing none other than Spencer Reid in the doorway. You don’t notice the flush of embarrassment on his cheeks that you heard his comment, just like he doesn’t notice the matching expression on your face. Penelope though, she notices. And, she can’t wait to tell Derek.

 Spencer clears his throat before speaking again. “We’re ready for you to come back in if you’re up for it. We want to talk to you about a plan to keep you safe.”

 “Sure thing.” You grab your tea from the table before you and Penelope follow Spencer back to the conference room. You sitting cross-legged in your seat. You feel much calmer after chatting with Penelope. Song writing has always been cathartic for you, and it is reassuring that hasn’t changed.

The agents waste no time getting down to business. “We believe the unsub has broken into your tour bus. If the letter was from him, it would explain how he knows about the peach scent.” Agent Rossi starts.

 Agent Morgan continues, “It’s an easier target than a hotel room or your personal home since fewer people would be securing it.” You nod along with them. You are determined to stay strong through this.

 “We want to completely ensure your safety, so we think it best to send an agent to stay with you while we work on the case.” Agent Prentiss chimes in. You feel like you’re going to get whiplash looking between all their faces.

 “Since we haven’t ruled out people on the crew, we want this to remain as secret as possible. We will inform the head of security on your team, but other than that the agent will be undercover.” Agent Hotchner, stern as ever, appears to be studying your reaction.

 “Okay.” You sigh. “Okay, I can handle this. I’ll be fine. I’ll have an agent with me. Who’s going undercover? Do you have a cover story planned?” You look at Agent Hotchner with nervous eyes.

 “We wanted to plan the cover story with you to make it as believable as possible. What are you planning on doing for the next few weeks?” You consider what your plans consist of. Honestly, nothing but songwriting.

 “I plan on mostly working on songwriting. I usually go to cafes, parks, or anywhere really with people for inspiration. If I already have an idea, I’ll write from my hotel room or from home if I’m there. If any of you have any musical experience, then we could make up a cover story about a new writing partner. Nobody would really question it because I write with new people all the time.” You glance around the room to see if anyone is willing to take you up on your offer. Nobody says anything for a minute. They are communicating with looks again.

 Penelope chimes in “Reid knows how to play the piano!” You can’t help but latch on to the statement as you turn toward Spencer.

 “Really, that would be so helpful! I normally write to piano or guitar and then add any additional instrumental later in the studio. If you can play, then the story would look even more believable!” You are actually getting excited about this idea working out. You finally feel like you’ve helped them with something. They probably could’ve figured it out without you, but still.

 “Yes, I can play. I mean, it’s just mathematics if you think about it.” Spencer responds quietly, like his mind is somewhere else.

 “Reid, if you feel comfortable with it, that story sounds like great cover.” Reid nods at Agent Hotchner. “Great. You can go to your place and grab some clothes and anything else you’ll need.” He says to Spencer before turning his attention to you. You watch as Spencer walks out with the rest of the team before turning to meet Agent Hotchner’s eye. “It’s best if we stick to your plans as closely as possible. If the unsub is someone who works with you, he will likely notice if you start changing your behavior too much.” You nod in response, mentally going through everything you do from day to day.

 “Agent Reid will stay with you in your hotel room if you are comfortable with it. That is the safest arrangement since he will be close by if anything happens. We will also have agents tail you when you go out in public. We’ll have a rotation of agents in the rooms around yours each night to allow Reid to rest as well. He knows how to contact us, but we will program our numbers into your phone as well for backup. Do not hesitate to call any one of us if something feels even remotely wrong, no matter the time. Do you understand?”

 Again, you nod in response. It’s a lot of information to take in and honestly, you’re still thinking about sharing a hotel room with Spencer.

 “We will need to see the letter you mentioned earlier if you still have it. We would also like to go through the fan mail you currently have and any new mail that comes in. If you see anything else that feels off or seems suspicious, tell Reid or call one of us. If you remember anything else, tell Reid or call one of us.” He gives you a questioning glance to ensure you are following.

 “Basically, tell Reid everything. Got it.” You try to remain lighthearted even though Agent Hotchner’s serious expression hasn’t waned in the slightest.

 “It’s good to see you’ve got a good attitude about this. It’s hard to remain calm, but it will help limit any suspicion on the part of the unsub. We don’t want to escalate his plans. Do you have any questions for me?” He gives you a reassuring look as you contemplate everything he’s told you.

 “What does unsub mean?” you blurt out, surprising both of you. “Sorry, that was loud.” You cringe. “I just meant, why do you call the criminal, unsub?”

 You can see the faintest of smiles on his face as he replies, “Right, we can get pretty wrapped up in a case. It stands for unidentified subject. We try not to assign nicknames or anything to the perpetrators as it can affect their behavior.”

 “Right. Behavior.” You try to sound like you understand, but honestly this is so much different from all the detective shows you’ve seen. Apparently, Agent Hotchner notices and explains more.

 “We catch criminals by analyzing their behavior and trying to predict what they’ll do next.”

 “Like psychology? Nature vs. Nurture and mental disorders?” You ask, suddenly very curious about how this all works.

 “Yes, just like that, although we normally go a little deeper.”

 “So what can you tell about this unsub? That way I know what to look for.” Agent Hotchner seems pleased with this question.

 “The unsub is a man, likely 25-40. Age is the hardest thing to predict, so don’t follow that guideline too strictly. He likely suffers from antisocial personality disorder stemming from negligent parents and has always had trouble interacting with people. He is highly organized, which usually indicates high intelligence, but in this case could be due to the time he spends alone planning. His lack of social skills has resulted in him only working menial jobs. He won’t have worked anywhere for more than a few months before finding a new job since people find him odd or off-putting. He has always felt as though he deserves more because of his self presumed high intelligence. It is possible you met him in passing and any act of kindness toward him resulted in an obsession with you. He doesn’t have the courage to approach you, so he watches from afar or online. That’s how he found his earlier victims. Since you don’t have any shows in the next few weeks, his MO might change slightly. That’s why we want to be so cautious and make sure we can ensure your safety.” You sit quietly for a moment, trying to picture anyone who fits the description. You try to meet the people who work with you, but you certainly don’t know everyone. You were honestly hopeful the description would point you toward a suspect, but you’ve got nothing. “I can’t think of anyone like that, but now I know what to look out for. Thank you Agent Hotchner.” “Please, call me Hotch. Do you have any more questions?”

��“Just one, you said earlier that maintaining a sense of normalcy will prevent us from escalating his plans. What plans exactly?” You were nervous to ask this question, wondering if you really wanted to hear the answer.

 “We don’t know exactly. It is possible the unsub has been trying to work up the courage to talk to you, but since you won’t be doing shows, it is unclear how he would make contact. Reid and the other agents will be looking for anyone who appears to be in a lot of the same places you are. If you notice anyone more than one time in a day, don’t hesitate to-“

“Tell Reid or call one of you. I got it.” You smile at him again. “Thank you again.” He nods as you both exit the room. Spencer isn’t back from picking up clothes yet, so you aren’t sure exactly what to do. Penelope notices you searching the room and waves you over to her. She is talking with Agent Morgan.

 “Y/N! I was just telling my Chocolate Thunder about the song you started earlier. I just need to know, what does this fine specimen inspire you to write?” She sounds so excited you can’t bear to let her down. You study the man in front of you, searching for something to sing. You don’t know why, but there’s a certain sadness in his eye. He hides it well with his masculinity and the clear smirk on his face, but you know he’s been through some shit.

 You don’t want to kill the mood though, so you stick to something a little lighter than past pain. “Well, Pen, I have to say he looks like a heartbreaker.” This only encourages the smirk on his face. “The type to love ‘em and leave ‘em.” You have had a song in the back of your mind for a while so why not break it out now. Penelope shrieks as you start humming, drawing a crowd. Again, you set up your phone to record. The rest of the BAU agents crowd around Morgan’s desk as you start singing.

 “Magic, madness, heaven, sin, saw you there and I thought, oh my god, look at that face. You look like my next mistake.” That draws a few chuckles as you continue humming. More words pop into your head as you think about past relationships and what the media loves to say about celebrities. “Screaming, crying, perfect storms. I can make all the tables turn. Da dada da da, Keep you second guessing like, Oh my god, who is she. I get drunk on jealousy.” You hum some more, really getting into the flow of the song. “Cause darling I’m a nightmare, dressed like a daydream.” The group claps as you end the recording.

 “That was actually pretty impressive.” Agent Morgan smirks at you some more.

 “Well, to be honest I’ve had the melody in my notes for weeks, but I just couldn’t think of the right words.” Yet again, his smirk grows.

 “I guess I’m just that inspirational.” You choke back a laugh as you roll your eyes. You hadn’t realized the size of the crowd you had garnered. You can’t help but knock him down a few pegs.

 “You know what, I changed my mind. Agent Morgan’s song would be called I Knew You Were Trouble.” The entire group laughs at that one, but all the sudden you actually have another idea.

Before long, Penelope is asking you what songs you would write about the entire team.

 “Start with Hotch!”

 “Well, Hotch is so serious. So it’s kind of hard. His face just screams ‘I’ve been through it and dealt it out’. Maybe something like… your string of lights is still bright to see oh, who you are is not what you did, you’re still an innocent.” Even as you half sing it, the one line feels like it could lead somewhere big. It’s not quite right, but it’s a start.

 “That’s so cool. Do me next! And please, just call me Emily.” You nod at her as you think back over your previous interactions.

 “Alright, don’t get mad but something just popped into my head and I can’t un-hear it. They say I did something bad, then why’s it feel so good. Most fun I ever had, and I’d do it over and over and over again if I could.” The smile on her face told you everything you needed to know, but so did JJ.

 “You absolutely nailed it. That is Emily to a tee.” JJ chimed in. “I’m kind of scared to see what you can come up with for me!” Your head is swimming with lyrics and melodies, but it has been so long since you’ve had this much fun writing music with a group of people. It’s become such a solo activity for you, but these people just have so many stories to tell.

 “Okay, let me think.” You pause as you observe JJ. You can tell that she is such a sweetheart from the few hours you’ve known her, but you know you would be intimidated if you went to high school with her. “Sorry to be blunt but, you’re so gorgeous, I can’t say anything to your face. Cause look at your face.”

 “Why thank you!” JJ smiles as you defend the lyric choice.

 “I know you are so sweet and I of course don’t mean to say you are just a pretty face, but you really do have a pretty face.” The group chuckles again and nods in agreement. “Oh, wait! I’ve got another one. You took a Polaroid of us, then discovered, the rest of the world was black and white. But we were in screaming color.” That one came out of nowhere, but it felt right.

 “Beautiful. Okay, okay! Rossi’s turn!” Penelope says right as the man walks out of his office.

 “My turn for what?” He looks skeptical of the group, but in a loving way.

 “Y/N is coming up with song ideas for everyone! She just did Morgan, Hotch, Emily, and JJ! She did mine earlier. So it’s your turn!”

 “Well then by all means, be my guest.” You close your eyes as you think through the words swimming in your head.

 “While, Rossi, you have a kind aura. You seem like a parent to this group of rowdy children. Reminds me of my dad.” Again, the group laughs. You begin humming, lightly patting the desk in front of you as you think back on memories of your own parents. “I don’t know why all the trees change in the fall, but I know you’re not scared of anything at all. Don’t know if Snow White’s house is near or far away, but I know I had the best day with you today.” This tune was softer than the rest, more emotional. Everyone stops laughing as they listen to the soft melody you created.

 “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to kill the mood.” You feel slightly awkward with the new found silence.

 “Please, bella, that was beautiful. You really know how to read people.” Rossi hugs you as you blush, thanking him for the compliment.

 “That only leaves the resident genius. What would you write about Reid?” JJ poses the question and suddenly all eyes are on you. In all the commotion with the other songs, you didn’t notice Spencer exit the elevator. He walked in soon enough to hear the question. Deciding not to interrupt the conversation, he hangs back to listen to your answer.

 You can feel the blush heating up your face, subconsciously hugging the sweatshirt he gave you to wear earlier. After all the short melodies and lyrics you’ve come up with, you are way too tired to put your feelings toward Spencer into words.

 “I’ll be honest, it’s been in my head all night.” You begin to hum, knowing this would be a song about how you felt when you first saw him backstage, to when you spoke to him in the hospital room and all the little moments since then. “Your eyes whispered have we met…” you fill in for lyrics you’ve yet to write by humming. “All I can say is it was enchanting to meet you.”

 “That was beautiful.” Spencer says from behind you. You jump in surprise, nearly falling out of your chair. You didn’t even realize he was in the room.

 He looks sheepish as he apologizes for scaring you. “Are you ready to go?” He asks, reaching out a hand to help you up. The rest of the profilers share a knowing look as you rise from your seated position. They all wish you a goodnight as you and Spencer enter the elevator to head to your hotel. The ride to the parking garage is quiet. You keep humming that same melody, looking for the right words to fill in the blanks.

 Spencer leads you to another black SUV opening the passenger side door for you to get in the car. He tosses his bag in the back before getting in and starting the drive.

 “Penelope said it was my turn, did you do songs for everyone?” Spencer beaks the silence. You turn in your seat to look at him before responding.

 “Kind of. Mostly just ideas of songs. Morgan’s was the most put together, only because it was a song I already started. I recorded the whole thing though. That way I won’t forget any ideas. I can play it for you when we actually start to write some music!” You are honestly surprised by the range of ideas you have.

 “Wh-what? You actually want me to help you write songs? I th-though that was just a cover.” All of the sudden Spencer seems nervous and shy. You put the ideas swimming through your head on pause so you can devote all your attention to him.

 “Spencer, don’t worry about it. You don’t have to come up with any profound lyrics or brand new chord progressions. But, since we are going to be spending a lot of time together, you do have to talk to me. Otherwise it would just be weird.” You try to lighten the mood. You can tell by the way he relaxed his shoulders it worked a little. He nods in agreement as he parks the SUV in the garage dedicated to the hotel you are staying in. You take the elevator straight up to the 11th floor. It’s honestly reassuring to be able to lead him somewhere after everything that happened in the past few hours.

 You dig around in your bag- that somehow followed you on your journey from the arena to the hospital to the FBI building and now back to your hotel- to find the room key. No matter what you try, you can’t seem to slide the key card into the slot in the right way. Every time you try, the little light glows red before beeping indicating the door is still locked. After the fifth try, you are about ready to scream.  

 Suddenly, you can feel the heat from Spencer’s body as he slides up behind you to take the room key. He slides the card into the door, wiggles it around, and then slides it back out. To your surprise, the light glows green and the door unlocks. You must be exhausted to be this shocked at the fact he opened the door. You can’t even seem to force your feet to move. You just stand there like a fool, mouth agape.

 “Why?” Spencer turns to look at you with a confused expression. “Why couldn’t I… How did you…?” You just point to the door. He places his hand on the small of your back, guiding you into the room. He places his bag just inside the door before he turns around to close the door and lock the deadbolt.

 Even after he led you into the room, you turned around so you could keep staring at the door. You don’t even realize you started crying. Spencer guides you to the bed and tucks you into the blankets. You know that you are going to wake up in an hour because you never sleep in pants, but you just don’t have the energy to fight him on it. He turns off the lamp, but before he walks away, you grab his arm.

 “Can you stay?” You have never heard yourself sound so frail. You squeeze your eyes shut, willing the tears to stop. Spencer looks conflicted, but ultimately sits down next to you, his back against the headboard. You lay next to him in the dark, not quite touching. Once your breathe calms enough that you can talk without bursting into tears, you ask “how do you do it?”

 “Do what?” You smile at the sound of genuine concern in his voice.

 “How do you deal with this kind of stuff all the time? I feel like I’m falling apart. I want to be strong about it, so I can help. But then all of the sudden I can’t keep it in anymore. I just… how do you make it seem so easy?” You feel sniffly again, but you try to focus on your breathing.

 “It’s not easy. I hope it never becomes easy. It’s gotten easier, of course, but the minute I stop feeling everything is the moment I let them win. To feel pain in situations like this is human. Somebody wise once told me our best defense is our ability to empathize. It’s a completely natural reaction to experiencing something so traumatic. 70% of adults in the U.S. have experienced some type of traumatic event at least once in their lives. That's 223.4 million people. It would be...” He trailed off.

 “It would be what?” You angled your head up to look at him even though you couldn’t see him in the dark.

 “Oh, it’s nothing. I tend to ramble. I’m sorry.” He sounded so dejected, you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching for his hand. You had to shift on the bed a bit to reach his arm, so you ended up leaning your cheek against his thigh, tossing your arm over his lap in a sort of make shift hug.

 “I like it. It’s calming… and informative.” You couldn’t help but smile into his leg. “People who complain are just jealous.” That actually makes him laugh, but it doesn’t sound like a happy kind of laugh. More like a self-deprecating one. “I’m serious. You are clearly smarter than everyone else is, and you are sneaky attractive. There is a lot to be jealous about.” You dig deeper into his lap as you squeeze his hand in yours. The last thing you remember before falling asleep is the feeling of Spencer running his free hand through your hair.

--

You wake up slowly, eyes adjusting to the dark. You can just make out the numbers on the bedside clock to be 4:37. You must have fallen asleep talking to Spencer. Your head was still resting on his lap, his hand in your hair. You untangle yourself from the sheets to rid yourself of the extra layers that woke you up. It takes a few minutes of digging around in the dark to find one of the t-shirts you normally sleep in. In that amount of time, Spencer, still sleeping, rearranged himself to be laying on the bed rather than leaning against the headboard. You stopped for a minute to observe his sleeping form. He looks so at peace compared to the furrow of his brow and the glint in his eye that normally mean he’s thinking too hard.

 As soon as you lay back down in the bed, Spencer gravitates toward you. Before long, your head is resting on his chest, his arms wrapped around you. You breathe in the scent of vanilla and new books; the rhythmic pattern of his chest rising and falling lulls you back to sleep.

Part 2

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Mercury Roadrunner's Interview about Freddie Mercury with Peter Freestone – Part I

Thanks very much to Mercury Roadrunner (Pavel Strashnyy) for letting me share his amazing interviews! Originally shared here. Check the tag "MR interview with Phoebe" to see the other parts.

Here are the 5 topics of this interview, beginning of each topic is written in bold:

1. Live Aid

2. The Works tour

3. "Mr. Bad Guy" album and recording period

4. "Heaven For Everyone", Freddie's habits about listening to music, opinions on Madonna, Montserrat

5. Swimming and memories about Los Angeles, Ibiza, Japan

Mercury Roadrunner: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. We welcome you to the unofficial Russian Queen fan club special program. You can find our website at www.vk.com/queenrocks. I am knownn as Mercury Roadrunner. This year marks the 50th anniversary of Queen. And I’m very happy to say that this evening we have a very, very special guest here with us, and it is an opera critic, a book lover, biographer and writer, and close friend, confident and personal assistant of Freddie Mercury, Mr Peter Freestone. Hello, Peter. How are you? Peter Freestone: Hi. I am… okay. I’m good, I’m good. What can I say? I’m good. PS: You are good and you are very happy to join the other Queen fans who would be very happy to hear you finally talking. And the first topic is about your personal memories. It’s a historic date but what are your own personal memories of 13th of July, the Live Aid day, what were your feelings in general on that day? PF: For me, I suppose, it was just another show… [laughs] PS: Really? PF: Because I worked for Freddie and he was going to do a show. I didn’t separate that from all the other performers that were going to be there, that made it such an incredible day. And not only in London, when they were also performing in America as well at the same time. When the satellite was showing something from London, then it showed something from Philadelphia, then back to London again. So to say, for me it was… another day. It wasn’t even as though there were such a big show because we’d played stadiums in South America. So, it wasn’t the size of the audience. I suppose, when it really struck me what was happening was when the band went onto stage. And the roar from the crowd was absolutely amazing. Again, it wasn’t so different from normal shows because they’d actually rehearsed for their twenty minutes. You know, there was four days’ rehearsal. So to say, it was normal, it was normal work, it was a short show. But then, thing is, it was in daylight and Freddie could actually see the audience. And from the back of the stage, we could look through holes in the back, you know, the screen in the back. And we could see what the band could see. And… then it sort of struck me that, actually, this is something very special. And then I was really so very, very proud of them. At the end of their set, when, again, the audience reaction was indescribable. What they had done in those twenty minutes, they had picked up the whole audience, shook it around and put them back down again. PS: Indeed. PF: So, yeah, that was what I felt. PS: And do you remember some of Freddie’s jokes, maybe, during the day, the way he interacted with other superstars, like David Bowie or others? PF: The thing is, he [Freddie] was just one person amongst his peers, you know. All of the bands were names, they were bands. And the thing I have found, and this goes all the way – the real professionals are the most normal, approachable people on earth. It’s the wannabes who have the attitude of “Don’t you know who I am?” and who behave like stars, because stars behave like human beings. Real stars, they can be just like the rest of us. There was a time when Freddie just wanted to be on his own, you know, with just his friends, with his group of people. But I mean, there’s a few photographs of him chatting with various people, like Elton John and David Bowie. I remember seeing them with him, and Adam Ant. And, of course, he had friends along; I think Wayne Sleep was there as well. In his life, he [Freddie] needed people around him that made him laugh. And so, he still had that. David Bowie and he had been friends for so long. Elton [and he] had been friends for even longer. So, it was actually a chance for them to sit and catch up rather than, you know, being in front of the world press. They liked to spend time on their own, you know, talking to each other, really talking, not putting on a show. PS: So, I imagine that backstage on that day Freddie felt pretty much joyful and relaxed, right? PF: Yeah, on the day of the show, I never really saw Freddie nervous…

because, the thing is, it was too late by then [to be nervous]. You know, there was no point in being nervous anymore because the show was going to go on whether you were nervous or not. So, why be nervous? Just, you know, get on and do the show, enjoy yourself. PS: And do you remember, where did the idea of Freddie and Roger joining the Band Aid on stage in the final song, “Do They Know It’s Christmas”, came from? Or was it totally a spontaneous idea for them to join the others? PF: I think the idea at that point was that anybody who was around, who would stay on to the end – because don’t forget the show had started in the afternoon, so not everybody was going to be waiting – but then anybody who was left, who wanted to join, could go and join. There was no strict “You must do this, you have to do this, you have to be there”. It’s “If you want to, by all means come and do it.” PS: And we even have a picture of both of you, Freddie and you, on that day when Freddie wears a white shirt for “Is This The World That We Created”, and you stand right next to him and it’s a beautiful picture. PF: And Queen were the only band that actually kept their dressing room. Because all the other bands had to vacate their dressing room half an hour after they’d performed, so that the next band could come and use it. But because Brian and Freddie were performing “Is This The World That We Created” at the end, they got to keep their dressing room from the time they arrived. [laughs] PS: So they spent the rest of the day after the show in their dressing room? PF: Well, in or around their dressing room, yes. PS: They, like, had their Royal Queen place there. PF: That’s it. Anybody else had to go into the Hard Rock Café. There had to be a tent, you know, hospitality tent there. And most people ended up in there because they were not allowed into their dressing rooms, they didn’t have dressing rooms after that. So… that also helped Freddie relax. [laughs] PS: Like, his little bit of his own, right? PF: Yes. PS: All right. So, the second topic is about you, Peter. And you are credited as a “band party” member on The Works tour. Can you please clarify what a band party meaning is? Because I am assuming it’s like an entourage but it will be nice to hear the expanded definition from you. PF: Yeah, the band party, I think, was about ten or twelve people. It was the band members, their assistants – me, Chris Taylor was there, and Paul Prenter was there. If Jim Beach was on the tour at the time, he would have been part of the band party too. And some of the time Gerry Stickells was there. But often he would be ahead, making sure that everything was ready for when the band arrived. But that was it. There was about ten people. And there were baggage tags for each member of the band party. That’s why I know because I had Number 9, I think. And there were about twelve, I think, altogether, because at one point at the beginning I used to have to collect the band party baggage, so that’s why I always knew which were, even though I wouldn’t know whose bag was what. It would have one of these crew tags on it, so I just picked up and I knew that there were going to be twenty bags, so I just picked the twenty bags. But they were easy to identify because of these tags. PS: I see. And what is your own favourite memory about The Works tour and about this time, like, 1984, 1985? Maybe the Rio shows? PF: Yeah, I mean Rio was… amazing. The feeling from that crowd… you know, something like 350,000 people. Oh, you can’t beat that. And when you’re flying in a helicopter over that crowd, it was stunning. But the thing is, I know this sounds really, really stupid but [laughs]… one thing I will always, always remember from that tour was, remember, in the back of the stage you had these wheels that turned every now and then, not constantly but just every now and then. That was because there was… the guy looking after Roger’s drums and me who actually turned those wheels. And there was no set cue or anything that, “Oh, it has to start on this bar, on this song.” No, it

was when he wasn’t doing anything and I wasn’t doing anything, we’d say “Ok, let’s go and do it.” And we turned the wheels for a couple of minutes and then left them alone. He had then to do something for Roger and I would just sit there like I always did. And then you’d go back and you’d turn the wheels, like a hamster. We were like hamsters… So, that’s my memory of The Works tour. PS: And how technically did you operate those wheels? How was it possible? PF: With your hands. You just grabbed hold, you know, because it was like cogs on a wheel, and you just grabbed hold of them. Because we would be behind, I mean, I was always on John Deacon’s side, so I was hidden behind his bass setup. And you just pulled on the cogs because the whole wheel was on a metal axle and you just held there and you just pulled it down. PS: And the wheels actually were the real wheels, the big ones, right? PF: The very big ones in the back that moved, yeah. And they were made of, I think, polystyrene and plywood. So they weren’t very heavy. PS: So it was, like, actually you taking a part in the show, like, directing this? PF: Yes, I mean, you know, this is how things used to work in the old days before half of you were born. [laughs] You had to use your hands. I don’t think that a Queen tour as it is now is manual anymore. Everything is “push buttons” in it. PS: Yes, so it was indeed like the works, you had to work to make it work, right? PF: Yes, but nobody knew that’s how it works. They just saw these wheels turning every now and then. PS: It’s like a kind of magic indeed… PF: Yes, this was the whole thing with the Queen show – that people saw things happening but didn’t try and think “Oh, how do they do that?” If I see a big show now, I just think “How do they do that?” You’re not listening to the music anymore, you’re thinking “How do they get this to move? How do they get that?” But in the old days, you never did that, you just saw it move and it was part of the show. PS: You were just enjoying it, you didn’t have the time to analyse it. PF: Yeah. PS: I see. That’s a great memory, Peter. So, the third topic is about Freddie’s solo album, “Mr. Bad Guy” Freddie firstly wanted to name his solo album Made In Heaven and he even mentions that title in an interview with David Wigg. Why did he later decide to call it Mr Bad Guy? PF: I think he felt that Mr Bad Guy represented him more than Made In Heaven. And the lyrics to that song, everything. It sort of was very much about him. I think that’s why it changed. I actually love that song because it is real orchestra on it. And I was in the studio. I mean, it’s not a massive studio, so what they had to do, they had to record each section, so the strings section was there and recorded all their parts. And they went out. And woodwind recorded all their parts. Then brass recorded their parts. Then timpani came in and recorded. You know, they could not do everything together, so it was actually really quite complicated. But the end result, I think, is great. It reminds me very, very much of “The Carnival of the Animals”, the old classical piece. That was written by Camille Saint-Saëns. But that is what I’m immediately reminded of when I listen to “Mr Bad Guy”, you know. [starts to hum the song] You know, all the different pieces of the orchestra doing it, repeating it. Now, that for me is my favourite part. PS: I also enjoy it, I adore it. It’s truly a work of art from Freddie. PF: Yes, definitely, definitely. And I agree with him because it does represent him, multifaceted. You know, you never expect… He never gives you something that you expect. He always gives you something that will surprise you. PS: Yes. And why bad guy, why do you think Mr Bad Guy? Why bad? PF: Because… anytime in the press, there was never anything saying what a lovely man he is. So why not live up to his reputation? PS: Yes, it’s like “Yes, I’m everybody’s Mr Bad Guy,” yes. PF: Yes, this is it. This is what people want to believe, so this is what I will be. PS: Yes. And why do you think his first title was exactly not some

other track title but exactly “Made In Heaven”? Why was his first idea about exactly this song, to call the album this way? PF: I don’t know, I really cannot answer that one for you. I don’t know why he thought of that. Maybe he thought that would be the most popular track. A very popular track. PS: Yeah, it’s a hit song, totally remindful, yeah. And what was Freddie mostly like during the recording? What’s your favourite memory of him in this period? PF: That’s a lot more difficult because it was a difficult time. Munich. It took him far too long to create it. In the end, he was more interested in going out and spending time with Barbara Valentin than he was in creating work. I mean, the amount of time… he would turn up in the studio at two o’clock. Because he always turned up at two o’clock. It was pointless staying or coming at ten because he wouldn’t. And the thing is, it’s a singer’s voice, he’s not really ready to use [it] until later on in the afternoon. Once he’s warmed up properly and everything else. But the thing is, by four o’clock the phone would be ringing and Barbara was bored, so Freddie would run over and go out with her. So it was hard. And sometimes it felt like he was forcing himself to enjoy himself. Because he also felt bad, because he knew he should have been working, but he was letting his arm be twisted very, very, very easily. Yeah, I mean, okay, yes, he did enjoy himself when he was with Barbara, but he also had in the back of his mind that he was supposed to be working. PS: But the final result, I think, is totally great, he’s so much presented there. PF: It wasn’t the commercial success that people were expecting, but I think Freddie was happy with it in the end. PS: Yeah, it’s, like, his self-portrait songs. PF: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It got that music out of his system so that when he was back with Queen he was thinking more of the band stuff than, you know, things that the band would be happy with and just him happy with. Also, the thing is, Freddie did miss the rest of the band. He would never admit it but if you listen to some of the instrumentals on some of his solo tracks you could imagine Brian playing the guitar, you could imagine John playing the bass. You know, he missed having the band around him. PS: I see, I see. Even though it was his only first experience as his solo work, he already missed the other boys. PF: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because the thing is, all his recording before Mr. Bad Guy had always been with other people around. You know, even when he was producing the Peter Straker album, he had friends around him doing things. This was him on his own and it was all on his shoulders. PS: Yeah, and he worked on this album perfectly, it’s absolutely a masterpiece, yeah. So, the fourth topic is about Freddie’s and Roger’s connection. There is a story that Freddie heard Roger’s song “Heaven For Everyone” and he liked it so much that he wanted to sing it, and in the end The Cross, Roger Taylor’s band, released a version with Freddie’s vocals on it. And do you remember, had Freddie ever listened to Roger’s solo albums at home? PF: Freddie didn’t really listen to very much of anybody’s music at home. The only thing I remember... well, okay, yes, I remember putting on videos of Prince. But, musically, we would put on, we would buy every one that came out. It was a series of CD’s and albums, of course, before the CD’s, Now That’s What I Call Music. And what it would be, would be the sort of top hits of two months or something. And they would all be on Now That’s What I Call Music 1, then Now That’s What I Call Music 2. I think it’s on to Now That’s What I Call Music 373 at the moment. I don’t know. That was the music that he would put on, it was the music of the time. Because, you know, for his own music, for Queen music, that was work for him. And what concerns Freddie listening to Roger’s albums - probably what it would’ve been he would’ve listened to it when he and Roger met up. But it wouldn’t necessarily be at home they would put on the album. They would meet up and Roger would say,

“Oh, you must hear, listen to this, you have to hear this. This is something I’ve been working on,” you know, that sort of thing. PS: I see. And, you mentioned Freddie enjoying Prince, and it connects me with the fifth topic and it’s about the musician of the same age as Prince and it’s, like, a connection of Freddie Mercury from Queen and the Queen of Pop who is known as Madonna. What was Freddie’s attitude to Madonna? Because it’s almost impossible to imagine that he never ever mentioned her or never talked about her. PF: He admired her as… a woman surviving and winning in basically a man’s world. Yeah, because she was a power. And for that he admired her. Some of the music he quite liked. But there’s also the other side of the coin. Freddie, for all he was, had one security with him whenever he went out or everything. And Freddie felt that Madonna was actually attracting attention to herself rather than protecting herself. When she would go running in Hyde Park with ten security, you know, he said, “If she went with one person, people wouldn’t even notice her, but because she’s got ten people around her, then the whole world is going to notice. And you are best safe not like that but if you have just one person.” So, I mean, for that side he didn’t understand her thinking, but for her musical acumen and for her performance he thought she was fine, she was good. PS: And what is your personal attitude to Madonna? Do you like her? PF: Again, some of the things she’s done I think are very, very good. I don’t know, the more recent stuff I’m not so keen on. But all the first ten years or whatever of her stuff, I loved it. Yeah. Because, again, she never copied, she always did her own thing, and she never repeated herself. And I love originality. PS: And what is your own favourite memory about Freddie and Montserrat, Barcelona story in general? PF: I suppose it would have to be the actual recording of “Barcelona” because that was the first track that was completed. Freddie had sent Montserrat a tape giving her a guide vocal. Mike Moran had written out the music for her and sent it. So when she came in, when she arrived, she was fully, fully prepared for what was going to happen. But I remember being with Freddie after she’d done the first tape of her vocals for Barcelona, and… there were almost, almost, I mean, there were tears down his face. He was saying, “I now have the greatest voice in the world singing my music.” And that will always stay with me, always. PS: I see, so it was, like, very deep for him. And what is your favourite memory of Montserrat as a person? PF: Ah, a lot of memories. I went to pick her up at the airport, took her to the hotel, I would go and meet her at the hotel, go with her to the studio, all of that sort of things. And I was only in the studio when Montserrat was there. And when she was actually putting her vocal tracks down, the track was basically finished. I saw her so many times after the recording as well. You know, I went to see different performances of her. And it was because of her that I was actually at the Palais Garnier in Paris. You know, the opera house in Paris. Because she actually did an AIDS Gala there. And she invited me to go. I think… her laughter. It’s just like Freddie’s. Because whenever people ask me what’s my first memory, what is the memory that first comes to my mind of Freddie, and it’s always him laughing. And it’s the same with her. Whether she’s just finished a performance or actually when she’s doing a recital or a concert. And during her encores, she is always giggling and laughing. Amazing giggle. Because she likes to bring the audience in during the encores. And she’s got this infectious giggle. She invited me to the first night ever of her performing Isolde in “Tristan and Isolde” in Barcelona. And talking with her afterwards, I said, “You must know how wonderful it is for me to be coming here, to be seeing it, to be listening to you.” And she says, “Of course, you’re part of the family.” So, that really has always stuck with me. PS: So, the next topic for

today is Freddie spending time just making any kind of normal activities. And the question is firstly about his swimming skills – could Freddie actually swim, and if yes, did he enjoy it? PF: I never saw him swim. Never. I don’t know if he could swim. I’ve often thought about that and I never saw it. He didn’t… thinking about it, we went on a motor boat when we were at Pike’s hotel in Ibiza one time. And he didn’t look the most comfortable. So, I really don’t know if he could actually swim. I never saw him in a swimming pool or anything like that. Even when there was a swimming pool around, I never saw him in it. PS: But speaking of other activities, for example, you mentioned your staying at Pike’s hotel, he liked to play tennis there, right? PF: Yes. And, of course, when he was younger he was very good at table tennis. So, yeah, he enjoyed tennis. When we were living together with Freddie in Los Angeles, in that house, there was a tennis court as well and he played there a few times. PS: I see. And what are your other memories of Los Angeles? PF: Los Angeles. Also I remember in Los Angeles it was in L’Ermitage hotel when Queen were designing the Hot Space album cover there. They were there, maybe, even rehearsing for a tour or something. That’s the hotel I was staying in at that time. It was just this concrete glass and… stainless steel… and chrome. It was a very, very modern hotel. I remember, there were all band members, I was there, Chris Taylor was there, Paul Prenter was there. And they were throwing ideas around. And that’s where Freddie came up with the colours. “That’s the hot space, the space is the colours, hot colours.” PS: Ah, so it has something to do with image, with colour as you see it… PF: Yeah, yeah, yeah. PS: The hot like the bright one, right? A definitive one. PF: Yeah, yeah. PS: And he drew, like, a draught of the cover, right? Because he is credited as designer. PF: They were talking about which colours and then who would be which colour and then what they would put on each colour. You know, when they started talking about, not necessarily a profile but just picking out the aspects that people recognize from each artist, like Brian and his hair, Freddie and his moustache, you know, that sort of thing. PS: And so, each member chose the colour for himself by his own, right? PF: Yeah, yeah, yeah. PS: And how do you think, why Freddie chose the red colour? PF: Because it’s the colour that sticks out the most, although red was not his favourite colour, his favourite colour was yellow. But red is the one that you first look at. If you look at every sale, you know, big sale signs and everything, it’s always red on white. Because red is the colour you notice more. Apparently, whether it’s true or not, I don’t know, but in the old days police stopped more red cars than any other car. PS: Oh, really? PF: Yeah. Just psychologically red is the colour that stands out. PS: And Freddie being so outstanding wanted to strike everybody. PF: Yeah. PS: I see. And you mentioned Freddie and you spending time at Pike’s hotel. And what is also your personal favourite memory of this time. PF: I suppose the swimming pool was actually something nice. To actually think that we were in the swimming pool where Wham had recorded “Club Tropicana”. I mean, yeah, Pike’s. It was a nice hotel. They treated you well. They treated you personally, you know, they took care of you. And so it was a nice place. You really felt well-treated. PS: And what was, like, the top of the top on Freddie’s 41st birthday? What are your memories? PF: The most ridiculous thing is when guests went off into a corner and started smoking, so they weren’t smoking at the table and set light to the decorations. There were all these paper decorations hanging down the walls and everything. And people were there smoking and not looking at what they were doing, and they set light to them with their cigarettes. And then they started throwing alcohol to try and, you know, because it was wet they thought they would put the flames out. I mean, some people are not

very, very bright. [laughs] PS: I see. And what was your favourite memory of his previous one birthday, in 1986, the hat party? PF: Now, the hat party was a one-off, there was no other party quite like that, in Garden Lodge. Not with two hundred and something guests. Because the thing is, the thing that I loved about the fact was that nothing was put away. None of his vases or, you know, anything was put on tables. All the antiques and everything. Everything was left there. Because, okay, there were two hundred people but he actually knew them. He knew he could trust them. PS: And what was it like for him when he arrived back from his magnificent journey to Japan? PF: The thing is, it extended because he was then back home opening up all the packages that had arrived and the crates that had arrived. Because everything was sent over as soon as he bought it. So, the big room, the small room. Everything, all the rooms were full. And these, he had twelve of them. So, it was like Christmas. You know, a six-week Christmas. Because he was away enjoying himself and then opening up and putting it all around the house. PS: So, he was actually in Japan for six weeks, right? PF: No, no, he was in Japan, I think, for about three weeks. But then when he came back, he had three weeks of opening up and putting them all out. PS: So, he had a chance to enjoy his presents one more time, like, actually having them all. PF: Precisely, precisely. PS: So, it was, like, double joy – first to buy it and then to enjoy it at home. PF: Yes, yeah, yeah. PS: And mostly he bought antiques, right? PF: Yeah, I mean, he did actually buy some modern porcelain and things, but almost everything was antique. Almost everything. PS: I see. It was indeed a magic year for him. The Magic tour and the magic holiday… PF: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Definitely. PS: I see, I see. So, as we are ending our first part by now, I’m saying to you a very, very big thank you, Peter. It’s amazing to hear all these stories about Freddie. PF: It’s been a pleasure, it’s a pleasure. SPECIAL THANKS TO VALUREX FOR CONTRIBUTION AND ASSISTENCE TO BE CONTINUED

[alinastracker]

If you’re still doing the prompts I have oneeeee hehe

" i mean... i-i'm cool with sharing the bed if you are. "

you got it baby 🥰

but i know something’s starting right now

It’s a sweltering Ravkan summer day, but nothing brings heat to her body like watching Mal in the pool, water droplets racing down his chest. His shaggy hair is a mop on his head, and she realizes this is what he must look like in the shower.

This is exactly why she didn’t want to bring him on the trip.

It’s the first week of July, and for the past three years, that’s meant a trip to the Os Alta Resort with Genya and Zoya. It’s a way for them to relax after exams and catch up now that they all attend different schools. But at the end of May, the two of them had FaceTimed her about a change for this year.  

“We were thinking of taking the boys with,” Genya says gently, nervous for her reaction.

Zoya is frank as ever. “It’s cheaper that way. Besides, after all this long distance, I could use a week of uninterrupted fuc—”

“Zoya!”

“Relax, Starkov. We’re all adults here.”

“Anyway,” Genya cuts in. “We’re just telling you in case you wanted to bring someone, too. Maybe Mal?”

“Mal and I aren’t dating.”

Only in her dreams.

“Might as well be,” Zoya mutters.

So in the choice between bringing Mal on what has basically turned into a couple’s retreat and going to said couple’s retreat alone, she’s chosen the former. It would be fine. Mal knows her friends. Him and Nikolai like to talk sports. Maybe it’ll be a little weird, being the only non-couple, but they could deal.

It would have been fine, if it weren’t for this morning’s check in.

"So it looks like we have you booked for three single rooms," the concierge says.

Alina frowns. "One of those should be a double."

The concierge checks again, each click of his mouse making her anxiety rise. He frowns. "Sorry, miss. It's showing me all singles."

"It's fine," Mal says. "Could we just upgrade it to a double, then?"

"Er, I'm afraid we're all booked, sir."

Nikolai claps his hands together, cheerful as ever at Zoya's side. "Well, I'll just switch with Alina, and Mal and I can — shit, Zoy!"

Zoya had stomped on his foot.

"We are not switching shit," she hisses under her breath.

Nikolai sighs. "My deadly dearest, certainly it's no big deal—"

"I bought us a new toy for this trip. We are not switching."

There is a brief moment where everyone freezes, then Genya groans, shaking her head as she murmurs apologies to the concierge, who is trying hard to pretend he hasn’t heard a thing. The tips of Mal's ears go red, and Alina is sure hers match. David, lost in his audiobook, is oblivious to all of it.

Nikolai clears his throat and turns to the two of them with a sheepish grin. "Sorry, mate. You're on your own."

The concierge slowly raises a finger and says, "We might be able to supply a cot?"

Alina can feel everyone's eyes on her, which is the last thing she ever wants. She has the strong desire to curl in on herself, but that only really works in the winter when she dons large coats and sweaters. But it’s summer, and she is in only a mustard yellow crop top and jean shorts, though she suddenly feels as exposed as if she were completely naked.

Mal takes one look at her and gently nudges his foot against hers. "I mean . . . I'm cool with sharing the bed if you are?"

Her brain is looking for anyway out of this whole conversation, so she nods.

So far, they have been in their room once to drop off their things and change into bathing suits, both of them dancing around the bed without ever touching it. The air in the room feels charged even with sunlight still pouring in. What would tonight be like?

More importantly, how was she supposed to handle sleeping beside him when she can’t even handle watching him in the pool?

Genya climbs on Mal’s shoulders for a game of chicken — David is, unsurprisingly, not in the pool, but sitting beside Alina on a lounge chair. She feels a pang of something like jealousy as she watches the game commence, which cannot be more ridiculous.

They can’t avoid the night forever, and it comes much too quickly despite how long they spend mingling at the resort bar. In their room, Mal lets Alina use the bathroom first. A kind offer, she thinks, until she realizes it leaves her to stake out a spot on the bed first. No more dancing.

Left side or right? Does Mal have a preference? Does she? How long until Mal finishes in the bathroom and comes out to see her staring at the bed like a mental person?

Right side, she chooses finally. She curls up on the left side of her body usually, so this way, she doesn’t have to face him as they sleep. Good call. As she untucks the covers from the bed, she secretly hopes to find something horrifying, like blood or bugs, so they can get a refund and leave. Sadly, it is a perfectly fine bed. Alina plops onto it and tucks herself in.

Mal finishes in the bathroom a few minutes later, and if he’s as rattled about their sleeping arrangement as she is, he does not show it. There’s plenty of space between them as he settles into bed. Maybe this won’t be as bad as she feared.

“Well, goodnight,” Mal says through a yawn.

“Goodnight,” Alina replies.

They each turn off their bedside lamps. Mal is softly snoring soon after, but Alina stays awake much too long for her liking, thinking of how close he is.

They fall into a similar routine for the next couple nights. During the day, all is fine. Their little group meshes well. Genya and Nikolai are often off together, both of them on a mission, it seems, to try every flavor of ice cream from Os Alta's ice cream bar. Or sometimes it’s Nikolai and Mal running off, joining a game of pool volleyball, both of them stupidly competitive. When Zoya gets annoyed with the overload of children at the waterpark, she joins David on one of the lounge chairs to read for a while — Zoya a smutty historical romance and David a nonfiction on modern space travel. We just shouldn't let Jeff Bezos come back, he argues to Genya later, while Zoya murmurs to Nikolai something she wants him to do to her that night.

Alina thanks the saints her room isn’t next to Zoya’s.

The trip is going so smoothly that she doesn’t realize what trouble Sunday brings with it. It’s always their favorite part of the trip: bottomless margarita night. They all have absolutely horrific, hilarious pictures and videos of themselves from the past three years thanks to bottomless margarita night at Os Alta. But the thought of being drunk like that while she’s sharing a bed with Mal?

Okay, so she just won’t drink tonight. Problem solved.

“You can’t not drink!” Zoya says, personally offended.

“Come on, it’s tradition!” Genya agrees.

But she’s determined to hold out. Only when she sees the others with their drinks, she decides one sip won’t hurt. One sip becomes one drink, and one drink becomes a couple. Soon enough, she’s drunk enough to sign herself up for karaoke, another Os Alta tradition.

“I dunno what I should siiiing,” she slurs, swaying lightly on her feet.

“I have the perfect song for you!” Genya cheers excitedly.

So that’s how she ends up on stage, drunk off her ass, horridly singing Taylor Swift’s We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together. She really gets into it, jumping and nailing the talking parts a little too well. But she can hear Genya and Zoya screaming the lyrics along with her, and it only encourages her.

Genya records a Snapchat of her performance, snickering to Mal and David about how she’s going to accidentally send it to the asshole Alina dated last year who’s still entirely too obsessed with her.

Nikolai is the only one of the boys drunk enough to sign up, taking the stage after Alina to perform a disgustingly off-key version of Queen’s Don’t Stop Me Now. They all agree that Freddie Mercury is rolling in his grave.

By the end of the night, the four of them are totally wasted. David, who had spent the night nursing one drink, his focus on getting Genya her drinks and ensuring that she didn’t trip over herself, has to help the aforementioned redhead up to their room. Nikolai and Zoya are a sight, both wickedly drunk, trying to help each other stay upright. Mal had only downed a couple drinks and is mostly sober, which Alina is very thankful for, as she can’t hold herself up to save her life. She nearly trips on absolutely nothing so many times that Mal finally scoops her into his arms, carrying her the rest of the way to the room. Alina giggles the whole way. 

There’s no getting ready for bed that night. Mal sets her on the bed, and she resigns to sleeping in her red summer dress. When Mal joins her after having a shower, drunk Alina has no qualms curling up against him and sniffing him.

“Mm, you smell good,” she hums.

Mal chuckles even as he tenses. Alina has her arm around him and her face pressed into his side. He’s not sure he can breathe. She’s too drunk to notice the blush on his face.

“That’s probably just because you smell like alcohol,” he hedges.

Alina giggles and shakes her head. “No, you always smell good.”

He doesn’t know what to do with this information, but he does a lot of thinking instead of sleeping as Alina passes out next to him.

Monday morning brings with it a pounding headache for Alina. She prepares for the bright sunlight streaming through the window, but the room is dark when she opens her eyes. Mal isn’t beside her, but he left aspirin and a glass of water on the nightstand in addition to pulling out the blackout curtains. She falls in love with him a little bit more. 

The day is a quiet one. The girls and Nikolai spend their time at the spa, Mal and David off doing saints know what. She gets the best massage of her life, and while her head still aches despite the pain pill, seeing Nikolai get his toenails painted bright red makes every sip she had last night worth it.

When they’re in the room again after dinner, tucking themselves into bed, Mal says, “You told me I smell good last night.”

Alina pauses. “I did?”

The night comes back to her. She totally told him he smelled good, and she had closed the space between them on the bed, curling up right next to him. She remembers all of it, suddenly and painfully.

“Oh, saints. Mal, I’m so sorry. I didn’t . . . I shouldn’t have—”

He cuts her off. “It’s okay, ‘Lina. You don’t have to apologize.”

“I don’t?”

Mal smiles an amused smile and leans over, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “No, you don’t. Not you. Never you.”

Alina is almost positive she can hear her heart pounding as Mal reaches for something tucked in the drawer of his nightstand.

“For you,” he says, handing her a long rectangular box. “Saw it today when I was out with David and I just— I thought of you.”

She can’t even process the image of Mal and David out shopping together, needing to open this damn box. With shaky fingers, she lifts the lid. Waiting for her inside is a dainty necklace with a gorgeous gold sun charm.

“Oh,” she says softly.

Mal blushes, and this time, Alina notices. “Do you like it?” he asks. “I just thought of you singing last night when I saw it. You’re so bright, Alina. All the time. Just like the sun.”

She has no idea what this confession means, or how she earned it from drunkenly telling him how good he smells — which his really quite good — but her heart has kicked into overdrive. She isn’t sure what, or how, but she knows something’s starting right now.

“I love it, Mal.” She turns so her back is facing him and hands over the necklace. “Will you help me put it on?”

He wraps the chain around her neck. The sun rests perfectly against her heart. She notices every little brush of his fingers against the back of her neck as Mal works the clasp.

When the necklace is secure, they both lay back down, noticeably closer this time. Not as close as last night, but close enough that their arms occasionally brush, close enough that she’ll end up kicking him during the night. Alina sleeps on her right side. 

Their trip might be ending tomorrow, but something better was beginning tonight.

[spade-riddles]

Submission: Lover rooms = rerecorded eras?

Alright, I’m putting this as a submission, because I may ramble here. 

But if my theory is correct, then the “rooms” in the Lover house don’t just represent certain albums of Taylor’s. They may also actually contain Easter eggs that will only make sense when we get the Taylor’s Version rerecording of each album! 

Am I mad? Maybe. (But we’re all mad here, so who cares.) 

Let’s put on our clown hats and take a deep dive. 

The Orange Room / Games Room / Fearless era 

This is the first room, and already contains some potential hints, even if we may not have recognized them as such at the time. 

First of all: ANAGRAMS. Taylor kicked off the Fearless TV era by scrambling the titles of the bonus tracks as a puzzle for fans to solve. An anagram is a word game, like Scrabble. Which is what Taylor and her lover are playing on the ceiling. 

We can take the “hidden words” / “word games” thing even further, by saying the “Willam Bowery” pseudonym, and the whole debacle over Toe being given a producer’s Grammy credit after the fact, are also examples of word games. And PR games. Which is what the orange room is all about. 

We also see the door of the orange room is open a crack. And in front of it are three things. A row of little ducks. What looks like a toy version of a London bus. And a trash can. This last one is right in front of the door, suggesting someone or something is potentially about to be thrown away. 

To have your “ducks in a row” is a saying meaning that you’re prepared and your plans are all set up, ready to be put into action. 

The London double decker bus has a less clear meaning. It could be a reference to Toe. It could be a reference to Taylor’s attendance at the Brit awards. Or it could be a reference to the End Game music video. Maybe it’s not even a bus - my view of it honestly isn’t clear enough to be sure. But I think it is. 

There is also a hamper on the other side of the room, and a crocheted blanket can be seen spilling out of it. This is interesting because Taylor keeps sending hand-made baby blankets to people. It’s a nice gesture but it’s also obviously a PR move, as the recipients post them on social media and show the world. So Taylor is probably doing this for a reason beyond just being sweet. Again, it’s hard to know what the inclusion of the blanket means here. It could just be a reference to all the PR games going on around the baby. Or it could mean that we’re about to see Karlie get a baby blanket too. Again, I don’t know. 

We also just had the release of the “Halfway Out The Door” Fearless chapter, which obviously seems like a metaphor for being halfway “out”. Taylor even called Fearless the “first outing”, and the motif of standing in doorways has been showing up in her promotional materials for a while now. She performed part of her Grammy’s medley while standing in the doorway of a mock cabin, and one of the promotional photos for Folklorevermore was of Taylor standing halfway out of a door, with a sign saying “2 ½” and an arrow pointing towards her. 

I can’t make out more details without hi-res images of the room I can really zoom in on. But already there is some interesting stuff there. 

If this pattern holds true, I wonder if the rest of the rooms contain clues to her upcoming PR rollout? 

If the next album to be released is Speak Now, then does that mean we might get “single” Taylor then? Taylor is shown composing on her own in that room, and Speak Now was the only album she wrote entirely on her own. This is an especially contentious subject given the way Toe (a beard who most likely had absolutely no input on her actual work) has been credited as a co-writer for her last two albums. Will Speak Now TV see Taylor drop Toe and reclaim her musical integrity? 

What about the 1989 era? In that we see Taylor’s lover jump into the fishbowl with her. Could that be a hint Kaylor might start being seen together again during 1989 TV? 

The Red era room shows Taylor and her lover at a party, but the lover is talking to someone else, while Taylor looks on longingly. Could that mean we get a narrative of Taylor pining for Karlie in that era? You could argue some of the groundwork for that has already been laid, with suggestive, regretful tracks on Folklorevermore, which even Karlie’s detractors think are about the Kaylor relationship. 

Debut era is green, which is the colour of growth, and depicts Taylor playing the drums while her lover hangs a picture of their cat on the wall. This suggests to me that Debut era could be the last era. (There will obviously have to be a delay before Reputation can be recorded.) So after Debut, we may get some forward momentum from Taylor. A lot of us suspect Taylor has another original album in the works. There were rumours of a third album to complement Folklore and Evermore, which would be called Woodvale and have a green colour scheme.

But there are also rumours that Taylor’s next new album will be rock-influenced album she was forced to shelve before Reputation. In LWYMMD Taylor sings “all I think about is karma”. She also depicts herself cutting the wings off a jet plane and spray painting “Reputation” on the side - suggesting her next planned album was something else, and Rep was a pivot. The Taylor who does this is dressed uniquely, in a jumpsuit with a palm fronds patterns. (There are tropical house plants in the green Debut room too.) The theory goes that this next album is called Karma, and there is some evidence that suggests Taylor is still working on it. Taylor did a joint Rolling Stone interview with Paul McCartney, she is rumoured to have worked with Lenny Kravitz recently, and she has now twice collaborated with HAIM. I really feel like we don’t talk about the significance of Taylor playing the drums in that room enough. It’s such an unusual move for her, and to me it suggests she’s hinting at a change in musical style. Going more rock. 

The portrait of the cat also feels important. It feels like a metaphor for something. That Taylor is going to make a statement via her art, unveiling something she’s proud of. Again, I’m not sure what that could be. Taylor’s love of cats has been used before as a hint about her true sexuality, and we do see Ryan Reynolds painting a portrait in the YNTCD music video. So this painting could represent a coming out. But then Taylor’s cats have also been jokingly referred to as her children, most famously in the ME! music video. And recent social media posts have seemed to carry forward the trend of Taylor using her cats as code for her child. The fact that Taylor has three cats, but only one gets a portrait, makes me wonder if it symbolizes Taylor making her child a more visible part of her life / art. 

All of this is just me theorizing. And obviously, the activity in the rooms shifts over the course of the video, so I could be missing or misinterpreting things. But I think there could be something to this theory. I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts, or get some eagle eye screen caps of the video. I can never zoom in far enough and I know there are probably more clues hidden away in it. 

[mayans-sauce]

✨Day 8✨

Pairing: Bishop Losa x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.8K

Warnings: NSFW, 18+ ONLY, cursing, daddy kink to the max, masturbation (male/female), sex toy-ish, mention of bodily fluids and a lot more dirty stuff lol

Join my ❕GROUP CHAT❕ if you want to get notified when I post❤️

Want to be specifically tagged for this Advent Calendar only, let me know!

❕When the text is in cursive that’s Bishop’s thoughts, dialogue and story while watching the videos you send him❕

❤️✨Advent Calendar Masterlist✨❤️

Thank you so much for reading and supporting! It really means a lot! I love you all❤️

Advent Calendar taglist: @hey-taylor-hey @justahopelessssromantic @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @curtainlover @yourwonkywriter @tomhardydallasstarsgirl

━━━━━━━✨✨✨✨✨━━━━━━━

Filming something at the clubhouse had been the number one thing you had wanted to do. Since all of the guys were away on the business trip, it left the clubhouse almost completely empty all the time, except for Chucky being there to hold down the fort.

You had sent him home early that evening, telling him that you would stay a while to get some stuff in order, so he might as well just take an early night.

Walking around the place as your mind races with ideas. At first, you thought that sitting your naked self on the pool table would be fun and have a little play session, but that just seemed too easy. You wanted it to be something special for Bishop, something that held a great value to him.

As you stepped into Templo, your eyes locked themselves on his gavel, sitting peacefully on the table. “No... I shouldn't.. should I?” Biting your fingernails as you contemplated if you should do this. You weren't sure if Bishop would be mad at you for doing this.

Looking at his chair, sitting lonely in the room, begging for you to sit your sweet ass on it. It was almost too perfect.

“Fuck it; I'm doing it.”

Grabbing the gavel and hurrying to the bathroom to give it a good wash. As you washed it thoroughly, you couldn't help but start loving this idea more and more. This was definitely going to get you punished when he got home, and just the thought of it made you wet by the seconds.

Getting back into the room again, you looked around. This was the place where they sat and discussed important business, the place where decisions were made, and you were about to do the most unholy thing in the room, and none of them would know except for Bishop.

You felt shy and nervous as you started to take off your clothes. Yes, you were all alone, and you were 99% sure that they didn't have any hidden cameras in here, but just the whole atmosphere felt intimidating.

Sitting on his chair as you got into position, spreading your legs wide for him to see you. Setting up the phone on the table, so he had a full view of you sitting on his throne.

Pressing record, and you were now ready to rock his world.

✨—————————✨

Traveling your hands all over yourself as you warmed up for what you were about to do.

“I wanted to do something very special for you, Bishop, something I knew you would never forget, especially when you walk into this room and sit in this chair. I think you can already guess where I am.”

“In my fucking chair, in... fuck... sweetheart... you are lucky that I'm not over there, or else I would have you bent over my knee and given you a good spanking.”

Bishop had already prepared himself for the video. Just as last night, he was naked on his bed with his dick in his hand, waiting for you to progress with your little show.

Putting two fingers in your mouth as you sucked them nice and wet. Making the travel down your body as you stop at your most precious spot, hovering your fingers over your sensitive pearl.

Looking into the camera with your brow arched, asking him through the screen if you should continue. You imagined that he was already begging you to continue with what you were about to do.

Putting pressure on your clit and rubbing it in delicate circles. The sensation making you close your legs for a moment but quickly prying them open again as you knew Bishop wanted to see.

He started to pump himself in his hand, and he prayed that you would keep your word today and not be a little cock tease.

Slipping your fingers into your wet pussy as your other hand palmed your breast. This was only the pre-show. You had a whole fucking event planned out for him.

Stopping everything you were doing as you giggled out.

“Don't worry, daddy, I'm not done yet. This was only the beginning. I have an even more special surprise for you. Something that is always going to be ingrained in your brain when you look at this.”

You reached behind your back where you had hidden his gavel and held it up for him to see.

“Fuck are you serious.” Bishops heart almost jumped out of his chest, his eyes getting darker with desire, and he could feel himself twitching in his hand.

“I'm going to be a good girl and make myself cum with this daddy.”

Taking the handle into your mouth as best as you could, sucking on it like it was his dick. “Mmm, I bet this is making your cock so fucking hard. The thought that I'm about to fuck myself with your gavel.”

When the handle was slick with your saliva, you made the painfully slow journey down to the area where you needed to feel it the most. Making a stop at your breasts to circle your nipples gently with the tip.

Traveling down further, you stopped at your most sensitive place, your clit pulsing in need to be touched. When you made contact with it, you let out a loud gasp.

Bishop was still slowly teasing himself at the sight of you. He had already wanted to chase his high multiple times, but he knew that the reward of waiting until you came together was going to be mind-blowing.

The anticipation was killing you, and all you wanted was to fill yourself up. But you continued to tease him, drawing out the time.

“What do you think, daddy? Should I put it in? Fuck myself with it and imagining that it's your big cock fucking me?”

“Fuck, yes! Be a good little girl for me and make yourself cum.”

Quickly putting it in your mouth again before you brought it down to your entrance.

Slowly slipping it inside of yourself. The thickness of the handle made you arch your back at the slight painful stretch, but all in all, it felt heavenly. “Fuck, that's so big.”

Bishop felt like he was going to have a heart attack. There you were sat. His fucking queen on his throne with his gavel deep inside your warm tight pussy.

Grabbing onto the metal part of the gavel, you slowly started to move it out until only the tip was inside and then filling yourself up again. Moaning out at the now delicious stretch. “So good... so good, daddy.”

Sticking your thumb into your mouth like Bishop would do most of the time. Sucking your thumb and moaning around it. Increasing the speed of the gavel.

Moving your wet thumb down to circle your needy clit. “Fuck daddy, that feels so good.”

Bishops eyes were fixated on your needy pussy swallowing his gavel whole. His hand moving faster on his hardness as he neared his climax.

Pulling your new favorite toy out to show him how it was covered in your wetness. “This is how you make me feel, Bishop. Wet and horny only for you.”

Pushing it inside of you again, now you were desperate to get to the finish line. Moving the handle rapidly in your tight hole. Your other hand palming your breasts, pulling and pinching your erect nipples for added stimulation.

“I'm going to cum, daddy... are you going to cum as well? I want us to cum together.”

“Fuck keep talking like that, baby.” His heavy moans were the only thing that could be heard in his room. His dick was twitching in his grasp as it was begging to cum.

You felt that heavenly pressure snap inside of you as your warm wetness exploded out of you. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Daddy, please! Fuck me, please. So fucking good.” Holding onto the armchair as the pleasure was too much to handle. Your whole body shaking as you tried the best that you could to move the gavel through your orgasm. Stars clouded your vision as your mind went foggy.

White delicious cream burst out of his tip, covering his hand and abs. This was possibly one of Bishop's strongest orgasms he has had in his life. He felt like he might have a heart attack and pass out. Head hung low as he basked in the post-orgasm feeling, his hand still pumping himself slowly as he wanted it to last forever.

Once you had calmed down from the intense orgasm, you pulled the handle out. Winching as your core was way too sensitive now.

Holding it in front of the camera so that he could have a good look at your thick cream sliding down it.

“That was so good, Bishop. I need to do this again sometime.”

Putting it inside of your mouth to clean it up. “Mmm, taste so good.”

Moving closer to the camera so that he could see your face better. “I hope you liked the show, daddy. Now I think I may do a round two just for myself.”

“Naughty girl.”

Blowing him a sweet kiss and saying your goodbyes.

“Bye, daddy, I love you.”

✨—————————✨

”I love you baby.”

Bishop didn't know what to do with himself after. He was still holding onto himself as his other hand went over his eyes to calm down.

After a few minutes, he picked his phone up again and snapped a picture of the mess that was made, and sent it to you.

📲To: My Wife❤️

Look at the mess you made baby girl!

📲From: My Wife❤️

Looks delicious😈 wish I was there to clean it up😘 you know I always love the taste of you.

📲To: My Wife❤️

Don't start with that now! You are going to get me hard again.

📲From: My Wife❤️

And what if that's exactly what I want to do😈

📲To: My Wife❤️

Are you trying to kill your old man over here?!

📲From: My Wife❤️

Maybe☺️ so I'm guessing that you enjoyed my little performance?

📲To: My Wife❤️

Daddy was very pleased with you little girl. Looking like the queen you are on your throne. I think you gave me a heart attack.

📲From: My Wife❤️

Be careful old man! I don't want you going to an elder home just yet😉

📲To: My Wife❤️

Haha. Very funny.

📲From: My Wife❤️

So is this something you would like to see again?

📲To: My Wife❤️

Next time I will be in the room watching your little play baby girl🍆💦

📲From: My Wife❤️

Sounds like a plan❤️

📲To: My Wife❤️

It's a date!

[swiftgronmasterpost]

Spring 2012 - The Swiftgron Spring

Click here for a vibes playlist appropriate to this part of the timeline.

Taylor writes Holy Ground some time in February 2012:

Never missing a chance to be unbearable, Dianna takes this proto Folklore aesthetic photoshoot with Ashley and others at the beginning of March (the 4th?) (which makes me think Taylor and Dianna may have started something up at or around that February Oscars party, she’s certainly spending a bit of quality time with Taylor’s two best friends at this point):

And Dianna’s in a good mood:

The Speak Now Tour ends March 18, 2012 and right after it seems like Swiftgron is inseparable.  I think mid March is the official beginning to their relationship though it’s possible they had been in touch on and off since 2010 and it’s also possible that they started a long distance flirtation in the fall of 2011 (or perhaps at the end of February 2012 given Dianna starts hanging out with Taylor’s friends while she’s back on tour - but Taylor hasn’t followed Dianna on Twitter yet) but all I know for sure is they hang out constantly starting at the end of March 2012.

March 25, 2012 - Hunger Games Movie Date

The first Swiftgron solo hang that we know of Dianna and Taylor go to see The Hunger Games - Taylor had two songs on the movie soundtrack!  There’s no press there to see them so it really does appear they just went to catch the film together.  Dianna tweets about it but doesn’t mention Taylor but some fans take a picture of them so we know they were there together.

Also right before or on this day Taylor start to follow Dianna on twitter:

A couple other things to note about this day:

It rained all day!

It rains rarely in LA but I think this was the inspiration for the lyric “all I know is pouring rain and everything has changed”

This was also a Sunday and a matinee which of course Taylor sings about later in the song The 1.

March 28, 2012 - Dianna is feeling grateful:

So grateful she writes out a list and tweets Taylor (among others) about it!

The first thing she is grateful for is, “My heart, which is open!”

She also mentions “new” and “exciting” which Taylor perhaps references in the Swiftgron anthem Wonderland with the lyric “didn’t it all seem new and exciting?”

March 30, 2012 - Dinner at Il Pastaio

Two days later after Dianna’s happy tweets she is having dinner with Taylor and Taylor’s mother Andrea (meeting the parents for the first time?)

It seems that Dianna leaves out a side or back door to avoid being spotted but this article notes that she was there:

If their first date was the Hunger Games (which the pouring rain lyric in EHC makes me think it was), Dianna was meeting Taylor’s mother less than a week later! “Didn’t they tell us don’t rush into things” indeed!

That night Dianna is tweeting about someone with a great attitude and a funky spirit:

March 31, 2012 - Kids’ Choice Awards and Dianna’s House Party

This guy tweets a bunch proving that Taylor was at Dianna’s house party after the 2012 Kids’ Choice Awards. 

This is significant because everyone made a big deal about Taylor dancing a bit to You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful (and she is dancing around in an adorably dorky manner with Selena, Claire, lesbian icon Sharpay Evans [she’s come a long way since East High School! Go Wildcats!], and Katy Perry):

Here’s the full performance:

The camera pans over to Taylor five times.  Haylor shippers sometimes point to this as the start of their romance but to me it reads as though a PRomance is in the works or perhaps fans’ reactions to Taylor enjoying 1D (of course we all know how she loves to sing about women from the male perspective) prompted the idea of Haylor.  

All I know is that she went to Dianna’s house that night not out with Harry so who do you think was important to her at that point?

April 1, 2012 -  Taylor is at the Academy of Country Music Awards in Las Vegas - she wins entertainer of the year and please look at Ashley’s reaction to suggestions that Taylor is dating Tim Tebow:

Then all the girls go to NYC together (even though it appears as though Taylor has no work related reason to be in NYC - Dianna is there to do some press.)

April 7, 2012 - Dinner at Otto:

April 8, 2012 - Spending time together at the Bowery (eye twitches) Hotel 

and for all the Haylor shippers? Harry didn’t show up...

April 9, 2012

Taylor is in Nashville:

Dianna stays behind in NYC and appears on The VIew.

April 11, 2012 - Taylor posts about recording Red (it appears to be Nashville due to the tweets surrounding it)

(Who’s got her so happy?)

April 12, 2012 - Taylor is still in Nashville

Dianna on Jimmy Kimmel (in NYC)

Ashley is with her!

Jimmy decides to get cute and brings up the “love triangle” between Dianna, Taylor, and Tim Tebow.  When she denies anything is going on with Tim he asks her if she’s dating Taylor. Dianna says “Noooo!” in what appears to be a brief split instance of surprise and panic but recovers smoothly and plays it off as a joke.  She quips, “Wouldn’t that be juicy?”  and turns to the camera to blow a kiss before saying, “Hi Taylor.”

Conclusion - Swiftgron is now traveling together.  Dianna and Taylor’s friend groups have completely meshed.  Taylor appears to go to New York simply to accompany Dianna since Taylor had no work related reason to be in the city that we know of.

The “I guess you’re in New York today” part of Come Back... Be Here (to be written later this spring) may be inspired by the period time where Taylor had to leave New York to work on Red while Dianna had to stay in NYC for work.

ALSO! Sometime this Spring Dianna answers a question about Taylor on her YM&C Blog and says she’d like to sing Ours on Glee:

Very cute since Ours is so soft and about choosing to love one another even though other people may object.

Click here to keep reading!

[bewitching-elizabeth-olsen]

Press: “It’s a New Day”: THR Drama Actress Roundtable

THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER: Gillian Anderson had been dreading this. A tripod had arrived at her home in the U.K., along with a mess of lights and, really, just the thought of having to sit through an hour-plus on Zoom had her practically reeling. But then the woman who stuns as Margaret Thatcher in the most recent season of Netflix’s The Crown got talking — about pigeonholing and pay equity, about grieving and giving oneself over — and soon she didn’t want to stop talking. And neither did anyone else — The Queen’s Gambit‘s Anya Taylor-Joy, Pose‘s Mj Rodriguez, Genius: Aretha‘s Cynthia Erivo, WandaVision’s Elizabeth Olsen and Ratched‘s Sarah Paulson — at THR’s annual (virtual) Drama Actress Roundtable.

Let’s start easy. Complete this sentence: On set, I’m the one who is most likely to be …

GILLIAN ANDERSON Hiding in a corner. (Laughter.)

ANYA TAYLOR-JOY Pacing whilst moving my hands like this (waving above) trying to figure out what it is that I’m doing.

SARAH PAULSON Bossing everyone around.

ELIZABETH OLSEN Probably trying to make the crew laugh.

At the same time, you’re also inhabiting characters for long stretches and often they require you to go to dark or heavy places. What happens when a director yells, “Cut”? Do they come home with you?

MJ RODRIGUEZ I try to separate myself from Blanca as much as possible, especially [because we’re] dealing with immense trauma. So, when I go home, it’s Michaela Jaé going home, and I bring Blanca to the set. It’s easier that way because it can weigh on you otherwise and wash off on your family.

TAYLOR-JOY I wish I had as much control over it. For me, there are some characters that you can very easily snap in and out of and then there are other ones like Beth in The Queen’s Gambit. I’d worked back-to-back on two projects with one day off in between, so by the time I got to filming the show, I was exhausted and there was no energy to create a barrier. And that was potentially the toughest thing about the show, because it was a wonderful experience as an actor to be able to not have to reach for any emotion, but then you also have to go through the psychological warfare of figuring out, “Why do I feel so awful in the morning?” Like, “What is happening?” And then you go, “Oh, it’s not my feelings,” but I have to sit in them all day and I have to be aware enough to go, “You are not depressed, the character is depressed, and at some point that will leave you.” But I do think a bath every single night — being able to have the visual representation of washing yourself clean of something — helps.

OLSEN Regardless of what exactly the day requires of you, emotionally, you’re just tired. And so you try to be patient and professional and kind, and then when you go home, that’s when your fuse is just … smaller. (Laughter.)

TAYLOR-JOY You should date us, we’re fabulous.

CYNTHIA ERIVO I did, it was a real ugly cry. After playing [Harriet Tubman in the 2019 film], I went straight to see my mother in London and I don’t know what happened, but I just broke. You know the visual representation of shattering glass? That was what was happening to me. All the stuff I had to dig through to play her, all that heartbreaking stuff didn’t leave me when I finished, and it took time to just dissipate. And it was the same with Aretha — unfortunately, the pandemic hit when we were in the middle of shooting, so I couldn’t completely get rid of her during the six-month hiatus, and then I had to go right back into playing her. And it’s little things, like mannerisms, that stick with you. The lilt in her voice when she’s speaking to people. Like, that’s not me but I was stuck with that for a bit. And I was recording an album at the same time, so there was no space between one and the other. It took me a while before I could listen to an Aretha song again.

ANDERSON I certainly had that experience doing X-Files for nine seasons. I had a good couple of mini breakdowns during that, and at the end, could not talk about it, could not see it, could not see pictures, could not. I needed to immerse immediately in theater in another country. And then after a while, I was able to embrace it again, but when I started to embrace it, it was almost like I separated myself so much that I was looking at the image as if it was another person. When you immerse yourself so entirely as we can and we do for such long periods of time, there’s not going to be no consequence to that. Of course, there’s going to be consequence to that.

TAYLOR-JOY May I pose a question to the group?

Please do.

TAYLOR-JOY It’s so wonderful hearing you two talk about this, because I’ve always felt really crazy for the depressions that you go into after you leave a character and not being able to necessarily connect with yourself. And I���m really curious to hear what your relationship is with something being seen. Because when I first started working, I convinced myself that filmmaking was a very private practice with a private group of people and that no one was ever going to see it. And I thought I’d grow out of that, and I haven’t. Every project I have to sit myself down about two months after it’s finished and go, “People are going to see this and have access to it whenever they want.” How do you guys work [handle that]? Because for Queen’s Gambit, I had to go through a grieving period. It was grief, genuinely, to think, “Oh goodness, this thing that I loved so much is not mine anymore.”

ANDERSON I had that experience after doing Blanche in Streetcar [Named Desire] here in the U.K. and then in New York.

OLSEN I saw your last performance in New York. You were fabulous.

PAULSON Fucking phenomenal.

ANDERSON I felt like I’d lost my best friend. I was grieving. Some friends of mine in New York had a brunch for me the weekend after [I finished my run], and I arrived like a complete wreck. It was so profound. I also knew it was unlikely I was going to do it again because I knew that I’d probably lose my mind. I got really close. Like, I’d survived by the skin of my teeth and if I did it again out of ego or attachment or not wanting to let her go, there would be consequences. So I knew it was the end, and it was so sad.

ERIVO Do you know what’s so crazy? I listen to you and I’m like, “Oh my God, that’s what was happening to me during The Color Purple.” It was the last show and I started grieving in the show, knowing that it was coming to an end. There’s one last song and I couldn’t get through it. And then the show ends and I buckled under the sadness of it. But there was no way I could have continued playing Celie on that stage. It [had been] 14 months and I had to let her go. The line between me and her had disappeared. But to answer your question, Anya, I’ve never had an issue with people seeing things. I usually have an issue seeing it after it’s done.

PAULSON This happened when I did Marcia Clark [for The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story]. I felt a profound connection to her and I felt protective of her, and the experience had been so tectonic plate-shifting for me, both as a performer and as a human, and I thought, “If I watch it, I’m going to pick apart everything.” She was left-handed, so every time I use my right hand, I’m going to think, “God damn it, why did they use that?” So, the only way to protect myself from that is to detach from what the world will experience with it. And I’ve maintained that for a long time now — I really don’t watch [things I’m in] because I don’t have the strength, first of all, to bear the sight of my face and, also, I find it really confronting. The preciousness of the thing you were creating with these other people is what I want to be the indelible thing for me and not how it was edited.

TAYLOR-JOY Mm-hmm.

PAULSON All that does is make me furious because I don’t have the power to go in and go, “Hi, um, could you choose take six? It’s infinitely better.” (Laughter.) And when you don’t have that ability and you’re at the mercy of someone else’s opinion of what is the finest work that you’ve done, which doesn’t always line up with what you feel, it’s really jarring and you feel so powerless to do anything about it. So, I have to just sage it all out and let my experience be the only thing that governs the way I feel about it.

RODRIGUEZ When the first two seasons of Pose came out, I didn’t watch them at first because I was just so nervous about how the world would receive it. It was a story that a lot of people haven’t gotten to see, and it was a whole bunch of trans women of color finally getting their shot. It’s a lot of responsibility. And on top of that, it’s a story that’s filled with trauma and things that a lot of us trans women have gone through, so it was hard for me to watch all of those things back.

Gillian, in your career you’ve also been a champion for pay equity. But even as you were promoting a book you co-authored on female empowerment a few years ago, you acknowledged that you were nervous speaking up about being paid less than your male co-star. What do you think you were scared of, and how have the conversations for you changed since?

ANDERSON I just need to point out that I first fought for pay equity way back when it was audacious by anybody’s standards, because I was a nobody when we started to do that series. But when I really spoke up about it was when it happened again, four or five years ago, after the career I’d already had post-X-Files. We were going back to do another season and Fox came to me to offer, I don’t know, a 10th of what my co-star [David Duchovny] was being offered. That was the point where I was like, “Fuck this. I’m actually going to talk about this [publicly].” And since then, it hasn’t really come up. I mean, I haven’t worked with a lot of men, so that hasn’t been an issue. (Laughs.) I’m certainly tuned to it, and were it something now, I’d address it. But I have so much admiration for anyone who stands up for their right either to be paid or to be hired, period. And look, they weren’t going to fire me on The X-Files. The stakes weren’t that high. I put my foot down, not because the stakes weren’t high, but if they were going to fire me, some people were going to have some things to say about that. It’s very different for a young woman going into a job situation with a boss who’s overbearing and asking for a pay raise.

Sure, you had leverage.

ANDERSON Yeah.

For the rest of you, when have you spoken up in your careers?

ERIVO I mean, the obvious is I’m a Black woman, and that has a lot to do with how you’re paid, how you’re hired, if you’re hired, the way you’re hired — it affects everything. I’m lucky enough to have a team behind me that is brave enough to ask the questions I’d like asked: What I’m being paid compared to the leading man in the show, or if I’m being paid a lot less, whether or not they are willing to come up so it becomes equal. And about little things in my contract that just make it easier to exist on a set. For me, it’s about having the guts to stick with it and to keep asking and keep fighting. And there are definitely times where you’re like, “I am so exhausted from asking the same thing.” Like, if we could please have this makeup artist with me because usually there are no Black makeup artists on a set and you’re the only one who needs one, and I’ve had to have that fight every single time I’ve gone onto a set: “I need to hire these two people because they are the only people that understand how to do my face or my hair.” It isn’t about vanity, it’s about making sure that whoever I’m playing is represented in the right way because they understand how to work with my skin tone and my hair. But you keep sticking with it because it’s not just me having my way, it’s me being able to employ two other people. And then maybe I’m asking, “Can we have a DP who understands lighting that works on my skin tone?” So it’s constantly being OK with asking the questions. And there is a bit of fear, like, “Am I going to be seen as difficult?” And yes, there are times where I’ve had someone say they’ve heard I was difficult, but usually, it’s because I’ve asked a question that will make for a better surrounding or a better show. And if I keep asking the questions and if other ladies like myself keep asking the questions, and we keep trying to better our spaces, it just becomes the norm — because at some point it has to just become the norm.

Elizabeth, I believe you had a saying in your house growing up, “No is a full sentence.” When do you find you use it?

OLSEN I use it a lot. (Laughs.) I use it when I’m on set. I mean, I want to be a part of every department when I’m on set. I want to understand the schedule. I want to understand everything. I produced a TV show [Sorry for Your Loss] that didn’t get too much light of day because it was on Facebook, which, whatever … but as a producer on it, it was really important for me to be a voice of everything you’re saying, Cynthia, and have heads of departments feel like and look like the freakin’ world. And just from having a taste of that for two seasons, I can’t [go back]. So when I go to do Dr. Strange 2 in England, I guess I use it when I just can’t shake it even though [the production is] so much bigger than me. I don’t know, my opinions are vast and everyone hears them, from the first AD to the EP. I think I’m like a representative of anyone having a hard time on set. … (Laughs.)

PAULSON You’re the Equity rep, I love it.

OLSEN Oh my God. (Laughter.)

When you think about your careers, is there someone else’s that you look at and go, “Ooh, yeah, I’d love that”?

OLSEN Gillian’s, Sarah’s …

ERIVO Yeah, Sarah, you’re that for me. You’re fucking incredible.

PAULSON You saying that to me makes me want to cry because sometimes you feel like you’re doing this in a bubble and you don’t even know if anything you’re doing ever has any meaning or impact to anyone.

ERIVO It does. From my heart, it does. And I hope I get to work with you one day.

PAULSON I’d give my eyeteeth. (Laughs.) For me, it’s Gillian — somebody being on a TV program for a long time that’s wildly successful and then retreats to another country to be onstage, to reconnect yourself to the very things that inspired you and made you want to be a part of this. It all gets very confusing in terms of how to navigate [this business]because you do want to make a living, but you also want to follow your heart. And there does come a time where you can become quite depleted from the constant output without any input. And if you’re a woman of a certain age, which I certainly am, I feel like I’ve got one foot on one window frame and I’ve got the other one over here and I’m just trying to insist that they stay open for as long as possible. And some of that is beyond my control, but when I look at Gillian’s career I just go, “Well, I want that.”

ANDERSON Thank you for saying that. On the one hand, I feel like there is some degree of design, but I’ve also never really gone after things. And when I finished with X-Files, I didn’t know if I wanted to be on a set again ever. So aside from having grown up in the U.K. and wanting to go back, I knew it would take time before I could, if I was going to. And in London, you could move between theater and TV, and that was always my dream. But every actor has the thing that they’d want more than the thing that they have, and I’m a cinephile, and so I [wonder], “Why do I keep doing TV? All I want to do is do film.” And I’m still doing TV. (Laughs.) But I’ve had such amazing opportunities that, coming from Scully, I even questioned people, like, “Why are you offering this to me? What makes you think that I can do this?” I’ll also say that as soon as you have kids, kids are the priority. So, I say to people, “I’m gonna be such a pain in the ass for you to hire. But if you think I’m this person, I’m gonna need to work during this period of time and then have time with my kids. And it’s going to be expensive for you. If you are willing to do that, then I’m your girl, and if you’re not, you need to find somebody else.”

Anya, Queen’s Gambit became a global juggernaut. How have your opportunities and choices changed? Is there pressure to strike while the iron is hot?

TAYLOR-JOY I think I’ve always followed character and only recently did I start following directors as well, but it’s always been about, “Do I feel like I’m the right person to tell this story? Do I think I can tell this story correctly?” And if you look at something like Queen’s Gambit, it was not supposed to be the white-hot show; it’s a show about a girl that plays chess for seven hours, but I felt so compelled to tell that story. So, it sounds cheesy, but I really just keep following my heart. OK, wait, I take that back. Something I’m also learning is that you give yourself to this person for three to six months, and I never used to think about this before, but now I start thinking, “Am I ready to give up my life for this person? Do I need to tell this story so badly that I’m going to do that?” I try not to think about what other people will think, because it’s your life at the end of the day. And as we all know, you’re that [character] every hour of the day, and when you go home it’s difficult to let go of them, so you have to really love them.

Mj, you’ve talked about how significant this show was for you and for the visibility of the trans community. How have the opportunities being presented to you post-Pose changed?

RODRIGUEZ In the middle of the third season, I started figuring out my worth, and it’s scary. I was nervous. I didn’t expect to actually book my next job after Pose.

ERIVO I did.

PAULSON We all did.

RODRIGUEZ And see, that’s my insecurity and that’s something I have to fix. I didn’t think it was possible. To get an opportunity like Pose and have myself centered in the story and to end it with hope, and then to get another opportunity with an iconic actress [an Apple TV+ comedy co-starring Maya Rudolph] was surreal. But if I’m still feeling the need for protection as far as my Blackness, my Latina-ness and my trans-ness go, that means there is more work to be done.

Are there doors still not open to the rest of you? Parts you’d love to play if only Hollywood would see you that way?

PAULSON No one has asked me to do a comedy, and I’m a little frustrated about that.

ERIVO And you’re funny as fuck.

PAULSON I spend a lot of time in these worlds where I’m either running or crying or screaming or playing a real person and trying to get their physicality, and I’d really like to do a nice road picture with me and a couple of chicks.

ANDERSON Ooh, I’ll go with you!

PAULSON How about all of us just in a road movie — like, get a Winnebago and let’s go?

ERIVO I’m down.

RODRIGUEZ Yeah, count me in.

ANDERSON I’m 53, Sarah, and I’ve really only been offered comedy in the last three years of my life, and I don’t think that’s because I’m any funnier than I used to be. I think a lot of it is that people just couldn’t fathom it, whether it was that Scully was still in their minds or it was someone else, because I’ve played a lot of dark characters, too. And so they just weren’t coming. And then came [Netflix comedy] Sex Education — and I passed when it first came to me because I didn’t think it was right. It was my partner who proverbially dug it out of the trash.

ERIVO I’ve yet to see a Call Me by Your Name for a Black woman, I have yet to see a piece that allows a woman of color to be sensual and soft and loving and be loved. I’ve just not seen it, and I desperately want to experience that, just because I want to be able to be in that space of vulnerability and lilt. I really want to do that. And that hasn’t come my way. A comedy hasn’t come my way either.

RODRIGUEZ Same. It’s been so hard when it comes to trans women being loved in a sensual way, and I’d love to do something like that.

Elizabeth and Anya, to Sarah’s point, Hollywood likes to keep actors in a lane. How have you avoided that kind of pigeonholing in your careers to date?

TAYLOR-JOY I’ve been saved from a lot of things in my life from pure innocence and naivete, genuinely. My first movie was called The Witch, I got a script immediately afterward that was about, you guessed it, a witch, and I figured, “Wow, why do they want to see me do this again?” So, I was immediately like, “Can I not do anymore witch movies, please?” And my agent was like, “OK. Sure, whatever you say.” I wonder how many people agree with me here because I certainly want to please, but in order to please, I don’t have to give up myself, and actually it’s more important to please myself than it is to please anybody else. I’m giving my heart, my body, my soul, everything to this character, I’m not going to do something because somebody wants me to do it. That doesn’t make any sense and, also, it makes me miserable and then I can’t do my best work. And so if I feel the opportunities that are being given to me aren’t the right ones, then I have to stick my neck out and go, “Hey, I think I could maybe do this, if you’ll give me the opportunity to try.”

How about you, Elizabeth?

OLSEN [In the beginning,] I was just trying so hard to not be put in a box that that’s what was guiding my choices. I knew that I didn’t want to be an actor who was thought of as “youthful and beautiful” and whatever that attachment people like to put onto young women, and so I did everything in my power not [to be seen as] that. But I didn’t have my own pillars of why I wanted to do things beyond just the character. That started to solidify only in the last five years. So I made a lot of odd decisions [after theater school at NYU] because I didn’t know enough about film and the machine of it. Right, Sarah? You were there for that time. We were in Martha Marcy May Marlene, and I remember someone asked me, “You had Sarah Paulson with you, didn’t you know it could be a film people saw?” And I was like …

PAULSON You were like, “Who the fuck is Sarah Paulson?” (Laughter.)

OLSEN No, but independent cinema to me was just, like, going to Quad Cinema in New York and seeing a movie. The theater world is all I understood. So I feel like a moron for going back to theater only once in 10 years. And this conversation with Gillian right now is inspiring.

In light of Elizabeth’s concern about the trap of being perceived as “youthful and beautiful,” how would you all complete this sentence: I wish our male counterparts also had to …

OLSEN Deal with lighting and hair and makeup before doing press. I don’t know what I’m doing.

ERIVO Deal with people believing that you’ve lost your sexuality after the age of 30.

TAYLOR-JOY Had an understanding of what it was like to walk into a room and sometimes have to enforce yourself for people to take you seriously. That ability to just walk into a room and go, “I am valid, I own my space and everybody respects me” — it would be good if they knew what it was like to not have that.

ERIVO And on the flip side, to not have to deal with walking into the room and trying to make sure people aren’t scared of you when you get there.

What do you all know now that you wish you could have told yourself at the beginning of your career?

PAULSON I would like to have told myself that I didn’t need to excise myself from the experience. I was very focused on looking at other actors who had careers that I admired when I was first starting out and wondering what it was about them that made it possible for them to be chosen or employed and I’d often try, in an audition or a social setting, to mimic what I imagined was the desired effect, taking me out of the scenario. And there’s this beautiful Martha Graham-to-Agnes de Mille letter that I used to keep in a dressing room any time I was doing a play, about how there is only one you in all of time and space and that what you see and how you experience things is unique to you. And if you block it, the world will not have it. And as a young person, I thought, “Mute me, mute my opinions, my thoughts, my assessments and try to fill it with other things,” and now I think it’s the exact opposite, so I wish I had known that earlier. But I’ll take knowing it now [over] never knowing it at all.

RODRIGUEZ I would have told my younger self that my existence is worth it. When I was younger, I tried to fit into this mold of what a woman should do — you know, keep your legs crossed, always bow down to a man. But we don’t have to live in that world anymore. It’s a new day.

It is, and that’s a good place to end. Thank you all for sharing your time and your stories.

ERIVO I know we’re supposed to finish, but do you know what’s occurred to me as I’ve listened to every one of you? I remember where I was when I watched every single one of you — and I remember what I was dealing with or going through. I was watching you, Sarah, when I was shooting Aretha. I was watching you, Elizabeth, when I was in London on my own, and you, Anya, when I was in Atlanta. Mj, I remember watching a season of Pose while I was shooting The Outsider. And Gillian, I watched you when I was in a hotel with my partner outside of London. And I remember what happened. And so your performances aren’t just brilliant, your performances get to be Post-its in all of our lives, and so I thank you for that.

PAULSON That’s a very beautiful way to put it …

ANDERSON It also brings us back full circle to what Anya said at the beginning, which is, “Oh my God, I have to keep reminding myself that people are going to watch this.” But actually, thank God that people are watching it, because we’ve touched each other’s lives and numerous other people’s lives just by focusing on the thing that we love most.

TAYLOR-JOY And the importance of these conversations is the honesty, because it’s very easy for us to get locked into our own heads of this as an individual experience — “There’s something wrong with me,” or “Everybody else is doing really great and nobody else grieves their characters,” or whatever your version of that is in whatever industry you’re in. But having honest conversations with people who are willing to be vulnerable just makes me feel so much less alone.

PAULSON The next time you feel that way, text me. I’ll remind you. I’d also like to say that there’s this [perception] of women being pitted against one another and not being there for one another, and this conversation is diametrically opposed, in that what we are actually saying is that each of us has been buoyed by and inspired by the work of everyone here. So, I may not watch anything I do, but I sure as hell am watching all of you.

Press: “It’s a New Day”: THR Drama Actress Roundtable was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

HALESTORM: Behind-The-Scenes Footage From Making Of 'Back From The Dead' Video

HALESTORM has shared behind-the-scenes footage from the making of the official video for the band's new single, "Back From The Dead". The track is taken from the group's upcoming fifth full-length album, due in 2022. Directed by Dustin Haney (Noah Cyrus, Luke Combs) and produced by Revolution Pictures, the clip features frontwoman Lzzy Hale and the rest of the band in a morgue and cemetery somewhere between life and death.

Lzzy says: "'Back From The Dead' is about survival, not in a physical sense, even though I know we all have been touched by death especially these last few years. This song is personal and written from a mental health perspective. I wanted to give myself and the world a hard rock song we could shout out loud as the gates opened again. I was on the edge of this world getting completely lost in oblivion, but even though it was the harder of two choices, I didn't just let the darkness and depression in my mind dig me an early grave. I didn't just sit and let it take me. I've erased my name from my headstone, so save your prayers, I'm back! I hope this song, as I pass it on to you, reminds YOU of your strength individually and that you are not alone."

She continues: "The video was so much fun to film! Dustin Haney is an amazing director. Dustin and his team really helped bring my words to life and the video is one of the most cinematic pieces we've done in years! I hope this song, as I pass it on…reminds YOU of YOUR individual strength and that you are not Alone. Raise your horns!"

By breaking rules, bucking trends, and busting down doors, HALESTORM has surged through rock 'n' roll on a singular path without compromise or apology. Along the way, the Pennsylvania-bred and Nashville-based quartet — Lzzy Hale (vocals, guitar), Arejay Hale (drums), Joe Hottinger (guitar) and Josh Smith (bass) — has collected a Grammy Award, scored successive number ones at radio, garnered multiple gold and platinum certifications, and performed to sold out crowds on five continents.

Going against the grain again in 2021, the band weathered the flames of chaos in 2020 and returned stronger than ever with their most empowering and undeniable anthems to date.

"Throughout the pandemic, I was writing a lot of melancholic and hopeless songs about the ups and downs of the world," admits Lzzy. "I've been in this group longer than I haven't been in it. We've always had shows. Even when I was 13 years old, we had a couple of bowling alley gigs once a month. This was the first time I didn't know if we would ever play again. However, I started to use music in the same way I did as a teenager—to get myself through this situation that was plaguing us all. I sidestepped and said, 'Let's keep our heads up, get our attitude back, be a light in the dark for a second, and celebrate the fact we're surviving and there's hope for the future.' So, we started to write songs that were a reminder to ourselves of who we are and what we're capable of. That became the mission statement."

In a way, it's always been the mission statement…

Since roaring to life in 1998, HALESTORM has uplifted audiences with a combination of sonic ass-kicking, provocative songwriting, and unshakable hooks. The four-piece received a Grammy Award in the category of "Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance" for "Love Bites (So Do I)". The song also minted them as the first female-fronted band to hit #1 on the Active Rock radio charts. Thus far, their discography spans two gold albums "Halestorm" and "The Strange Case Of..." , a platinum single "I Miss The Misery", and two gold singles "Here's To Us" and "I Get Off". Between surpassing one billion cumulative streams worldwide, they've notched two consecutive Top 10 debuts on the Billboard Top 200 with "Into The Wild Life" (2015) and "Vicious" (2018). The latter represented a critical high watermark with Rolling Stone citing it as "a muscular, adventurous, and especially relevant rock record." In its wake, "Uncomfortable" emerged as their fourth #1 at rock radio and earned their second Grammy Award nomination, while Loudwire christened HALESTORM "Rock Artist Of The Decade" in 2019. Not to mention, they have supported everyone from HEAVEN & HELL and Alice Cooper to Joan Jett on the road.

Even as the world went dormant during 2020, Lzzy remained prolific. She lent her voice to collaborations with everyone from Dee Snider of TWISTED SISTER, IN THIS MOMENT, APOCALYPTICA, and Mark Morton of LAMB OF GOD to EVANESCENCE, Cory Marks, and Mongolian phenomenon THE HU. Additionally, she joined forces with a trio of legends — Corey Taylor of SLIPKNOT, Scott Ian of ANTHRAX and original SLAYER drummer Dave Lombardo — for the theme song to Netflix's "Thunder Force". Plus, the group contributed a cover of THE WHO's "Long Live Rock" to the documentary of the same name. Expanding her presence across television, she hosted the AXS TV "A Year In Music" series, joined the cast of Hit Parader's "No Cover" as a judge, provided the singing voice for Bella Thorne in the Prime Video hit "Paradise City" and launched her own show "Raise Your Horns" on Rolling Live. On the channel, she appeared in Mike Garson's David Bowie tribute with a performance of "Moonage Daydream" alongside Broadway star Lena Hall. She also participated in the platform's Ronnie James Dio tribute, supporting the Stand Up And Shout Cancer Fund.

At the same time, she remained a huge proponent of encouraging the dialogue around mental health. She participated in a Grammy Mental Health panel and empowered the next generation of rock musicians as the keynote speaker at the Little Kids Rock Modern Band Summit. She also made history as Gibson Guitars' first-ever female ambassador.

"I've learned a lot about myself through all of these different projects," she admits. "I said 'yes' to various adventures, and it made me a better artist."

Working out of her home studio in Nashville, Lzzy and the band channeled this renewed spirit into the music at the onset of 2021. Collaborating with Scott Stevens of THE EXIES, the musicians hit their stride and cooked up the single 'Back From The Dead'. Dramatic distortion and drums rumble as she screams, "I'm back from the dead!" HALESTORM come out swinging as punchy verses give way to a call-and-response chorus shocked to life with a searing solo and thunderous groove.

"We needed a reintroduction," she exclaims. "We needed something that simply said, 'Hey, we're back'. The live show is the time we feel as truly alive as we can be. When you walk out on stage with your guitar strapped on, your guys are next to you, and you have an audience looking at you, it's everything. We're celebrating the fact we're all back together again. Whatever it is that was trying to destroy that part of myself and my bandmates that our fans need couldn't do it. It failed miserably. We're fucking back."

From the moment the band graced the stage at a secret Nashville gig, they were indeed "back," albeit louder, heavier, and emboldened by an unbelievable year. Amped up to jump back in, their tour schedule took shape with festival dates followed by a co-headline run with EVANESCENCE in the fall.

Readying their fifth full-length album, they're delivering the soundtrack for a world ready to roar again.

"We've lost a lot of people, but we can start healing again," she leaves off. "I appreciate the little things even more. I don't only feel this confidence in myself, but also in every one of my band members. We're not the same people, none of us could ever be. HALESTORM is my source of my joy. It's my connection. It's the closest thing to my religion. We're moving forward. With this next album, I hope we're able to create a greater sense of community. We have a beautiful opportunity. When you listen to it, I want you to feel like you can walk through any fire."

[lydia-yougowith-stiles]

My Top Ships of 2020

It’s FINALLY here!! The list of my top ships of 2020. What a year it was and I can’t believe it’s already January 8th as I’m writing this. Just like I mentioned with my 2020 TV Wrap Up, a lot of these ships helped me escape during 2020. I can’t wait to see where they’re headed for 2021. I have also started watching a few things in December, but I will be saving those ships for my 2021 list. (You’ll notice I have already expanded this list from last year.) Last year, I debated about including an Honorable Mentions sections. This year I will be including it because I wanted to still talk about these ships, but found it hard to rank them with the others. Without further ado here we go!  

Oh! One last thing. Compared to previous years Bellarke has not made it on this list. J. Roth did us dirty with this last season of the 100 and I will pretend it didn’t exist. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

~ Anne with an E: Jerry and Diana

These two were SOOO CUTE until Diana started acting rude and left our perfect boy Jerry. Watching this last season back, I grew not to like this couple as much as I did the first time. This most definitely had to do with the fact that I knew the outcome AND I could see Diana using him more earlier. She wanted to experience something different and rebel and Jerry was there. But they were so cute as they walked home together and shared books. I’m also really proud of Anne for sticking by Jerry when she found out the truth about their relationship. (As you probably already know I love Jerry so much and don’t want any harm to come for him, so this was a tough one, but yes I’m still including it.) 

~Umbrella Academy: Klaus and Dave

I started watching Umbrella Academy this year, so I was lucky to not just experience the first season, but also the second. I instantly fell in love with Klaus and Dave and we barely got any scenes with them. (That’s my main reason for making them an honorable mention rather than a permanent spot on this list.) I wish we had more scenes with them in love. We do get some great moments in scene two with a younger Dave, which highlights Klaus’ love for him, but it’s not the same. I really love how much Dave changed Klaus. I would argue they’re my favorite romantic relationship on the show. 

~Walking Dead World Beyond: Hope and Elton

Here’s my classic shipping people together who weren’t technically romantic (but honestly those often make the best and most satisfying ships if the writers open their eyes to the chemistry that is on screen...but I digress). While they technically weren’t “romantic” you could tell that Elton grew to have a crush on Hope as the season went on. There was definitely a lot going on between their characters as Hope ***I’m going to try and avoid a spoiler here*** was one of the last people to see Elton’s mom. I think there’s potential for these two down the road and as there are only 2 seasons slotted for Walking Dead World Beyond, I can only hope this is the path the writers take. 

~Violetta: Angie and Pablo

Okay, so even if you have not heard of the Disney Channel telenovela “Violetta” or seen many of my posts, can you just appreciate the chemistry in the above moment between these two people! For a good amount of season 1 of the show, Angie and Pablo were the couple for me and I was ESTATIC when they finally got together. I anticipated it wouldn’t be for long because of slight spoilers and more intuition, but god were they beautiful together. Friends to lovers to the extreme. Screw Herman! Now as I’m slowing watching season 3, I know these two won’t be OTP, but I can savor in this moment and remember the good times. 

17. Violetta: Violetta and Leon

Two back to back Violetta appreciation posts. This show took up my entire 2020 from awaiting for season 2 (and 3) on Disney Plus, as well as watching the 80 episodes (a piece!). Currently, I’m trying to get back into wanting to watch season 3 (as other shows took precedent). With the amount of Violetta I watched, I couldn’t leave Violetta and Leon off this list. They were the favored ship of the show (and one of the most central). In season 1 it took me a little time to like them together, but by episode 35 I could feel the mutual attraction. I remember the moment of them singing/playing piano together. I knew they’d be endgame. My main complaint is that when these two are a part they are SUPER ANNOYING! Like they (specifically I’m thinking of Leon) say rude things about the other person and I’m like how could you be okay to get back together? Their best moments are definitely in season 2, whether singing to the other person or imagining singing to them. Definitely at the end of the season when they’re in Spain. I still have to watch the end of their love story, so I hope it’s satisfying.

16. High School Musical the Musical the Series: Nini and Ricky 

So I added this ship onto my list long before I knew about any real-life/personal drama that was happening among the cast. I considered taking it off the list, but as I am discussing the fictional characters I decided to leave it. High School Musical the Musical the Series was a very early 2020 watch. I liked the show more than I was expecting and was upset to hear that season 2 wouldn’t include a performance of High School Musical 2. (I mean, Beauty and the Beast...really?) This was one of those extremely rare times where I actually liked a ship that was the main ship. Usually, I favor the other part of the love triangle or the underappreciated part. I was both shocked and happy when Ricky and Nini kissed in the finale and got together. Of course the final episode ended with some hurtles for season 2 (which now I guess there will be even more), but it was good to see them together and happy. 

15. Legacies: Hope and Josie

With all of these shows ending earlier than they should have due to COVID, I feel like I’m going to sound like a broken record when I say I don’t remember a lot of what happened in this last season. (I guess for 2021 I’ll have to take more thorough notes, but then again you can see which ships I like more.) With Hope and Josie, season 2 was a bit of a rough road. I mean, what do you expect when you erase yourself from existence for the greater good, which means that your boyfriend hooks up with your friend/eventual lover? (Yes, I added in that second part.) Josie and Landon felt very awkward in the beginning of this season when they were in “love” and forgot about Hope. (I rarely heard anyone say they liked them together.) It got more awkward when Hope came back in the picture and had to watch them together. Then we had that spill with Josie being evil (which I was surprised they tackled so early on in the show. Feels like a later plot to explore). Due to all these hurtles, there were less opportunities for my OTP of Legacies. The best moment we got was in the above photo when Hope went into Josie’s subconscious and was speaking to Josie as a fictional pig the whole time. We will never forget how the “pig” suggested Hope kiss her awake. Come on Julie! Give us what we want! 

14. Single Parents: Will and Angie

Will and Angie were far down on my Top Ships last year. Another friends to lovers, you could just feel the chemistry between these two and that was strengthened in season 2. (I just loved some couples more this year I guess.) Last year, they couldn’t really act on too much romance between these two because of Poppy and Douglas’ relationship, but as those two had some drama this season, Will and Angie had a greater chance of getting together. We watched moments where the two pretended to be a couple (for the sake of Will’s parents) and eventually Will came to the realization of his feelings for Angie. In a classic season 2 plot device of a sitcom, Angie decided to go with her real-life husband/Graham’s dad at the end of the season. But you could see she also had feelings for Will and they HAVE to act on those next season. I can’t remember if the show got a third season, and I will be crushed if they didn’t. Previously, they’ve been mid-season starts so I feel hopeful.  

13. Emma: Emma and Knightley

The last movie I watched in movie theaters was Emma. While it makes me sad that I haven’t been able to go back since, this film was a great one to hold this memory. As an avid Jane Austen fan (and period drama as you will continue to notice), I LOVED this Emma and Knightley pairing. This couple is one of my favorites of the Austen heroines and heroes and I have many favorite reincarnations from Romola Garai and Johnny Lee Miller to Joanna Sotomura and Brent Bailey in Emma Approved (still so sad those two broke up). So it was very hard to live up to what I’ve watched and liked before. Anya Taylor-Joy and Johnny Flynn did not disappoint and will be one of the combos I think of when I re-visit the novel. I love how we didn’t focus on their crazy age difference and really highlighted on their relationship as family friends and going back a long time. I specifically like the decision to bring in some early nods to Knightley admitting his feelings for Emma and then not doing so because of the presence of Frank Churchill. Just talking about all of this makes me want to re-watch the movie all over again. :) **If you’re a fan of this combo or Emma/Knightley in general that you have to watch this video. It is amazing! 

12. Avatar The Last Airbender: Zuko and Katara

Another binge from 2020. I watched Avatar the Last Airbender in the summer and was amazed by the story-telling and how deep they could get for a kid’s program. Despite, being in MS/HS when the show originally aired, I hadn’t watched it before. So many people had told me to do and then with the help of Netflix, I felt the pull to do so during quarantine. When I headed into the show, I thought Zuko and Katara eventually got together. Mainly, because I know the fandom and love for them is so strong. I instantly felt this too. There were so many great parallels between there characters. (I mean clearly we have the whole water and fire dynamic.) Even when these two weren’t in scenes together I was thinking about how well they’d work together. So needless to say I was disappointed when they didn’t get to be endgame. We did a lot of great moments at the end of season two and definitely with season three. The Last Agni Kai scene will forever give me chills and represent how deep Zutara is. The evidence is all right there. Such a great ship. 

11. Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist: Zoey and Max

Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist was one of my favorite watches of 2020 and such a feel good show for a moment with a lot of uncertainty. (I highly recommend if you haven’t watched it. Season 2 just started on NBC this week.) For a while I felt very on the fence if I shipped Zoey more with Simon or Max. As you can notice friends to lovers has been a common thread with my posts (although I LOVE a good enemies to lovers) and Max was that 100%. Plus, he’s played by Skylar Astin so what’s not to love. Despite, all of that I felt both of the men in Zoey’s life had potential and I could be happy if she ended up with either one. By episode 6 I was leaning towards Max (if I’m remembering correctly this would be the “When I Wake Up” number with the scooter) and then by episode 8 I was all in! I mean she sang “I’m Yours” to him. (Episode 8 was one of my favorites for the whole season. She did a fantastic job singing and I loved the twist of events. Also, Max being there for her was adorable. The “Pressure” song in the conference room OMG, get me a Max!) The only thing that upset me about their relationship and Max’s character was how sudden his emotions were. It became all or nothing and it felt like too much. He shouldn’t have given Zoey an ultimatum like that. Once he went to work upstairs, I grew to not like this character. Luckily by the last episode I saw some of the old Max again. We’ll see what happens with this new season. 

10. Julie and the Phantoms: Julie and Luke

Julie and the Phantoms: I cannot talk highly enough of this show. It is amazing and everyone needs to be watching it. Of course, it was created by Kenny Ortega so need I say more...but there is so much more to appreciate too. The actors are fantastic and I love the characters they portray! I also can’t stop listening to the music. But this moment is for Julie and Luke, sorry, I should stop promoting the show :) It was very obvious that two members of the band should fall in love and with Julie and Luke both writing their own music and being passionate about their craft it became a no-brainer that they should end up catching feelings for one another. Of course, there’s the major hurtle that he’s a ghost, but we can figure that out in season 2. Luke is obviously the better pick for Julie (Nick who?). They are just so adorable together and I can’t get over that moment when he talks to her at school by her locker and she pretends to talk on her phone. The way they look at each other says it all. (Such great acting!) Then there’s Edge of Great and Luke’s guitar solo. OH! They’re so meant for each other. While no season 2 announcement has been realized yet, there’s no way this show does not get renewed. 

9. The 100: Murphy and Emori

Okay, so I know this sounds hypocritical that I said I won’t think the last season of the 100 exists and here are Murphy and Emori. But in my defense they are the best part of this season and my love for them as a couple really came to a head this season. Murphy had so much character growth and I was fearing for his life almost every episode. Same went for Emori especially after her accident I didn’t feel positive. These two (along with Raven) were the shining beacon in a very disappointing and confusing season. I love how close they are and how strong they make each other. They have been through so much and it was nice to see them so happy (despite everything going on). You just knew they’d always have each other’s backs no matter what. 

8. Violetta: Fran and Diego

I feel like I would do anything for this ship and I have so many more episodes of season 3 to go. (So that’s saying something.) Another Violetta ship, but arguably the best and one that I know is endgame because I grew so obsessed that I started searching for spoilers early on. (That’s how you know it’s bad. Especially when you’re watching YouTube videos without subtitles, so you have no idea what they’re saying, but they look happy and therefore you are happy.) Fran and Diego only got together in the third and finale season of Violetta. Previously, they were a part of different romances (Diego a major one with Violetta), but at the start of this season they are put together in a lot of situations and quickly grow a strong relationship. You can feel the chemistry instantly! They just fit each other so well. Their singing voices together-OMG! While it took FOREVER for their relationship to be public knowledge, I really haven’t had any other problems with them together. (And with 80 episodes it could easily be the case.) A positive of having more than 30 episodes to go: I have more opportunity to fall even more in love with these two. 

7. Sanditon: Esther and Babington

I LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH! I watched Sanditon so long ago that my memory could get fuzzy, but one thing that stands out clearly is how great it was watching Esther and Babington get together. When thinking about this show people will probably immediately think of Sidney and Charlotte and while they are great and the central couple of the series, these two have my heart. Esther has SO MUCH character growth and development and Babington is a big influence on that. He helps her to see that she can be so much more than what she currently is doing and gets her away from her brother and that lifestyle. For a bit it was touch and go and I wasn’t sure if the two would be endgame, but luckily they were. It appeared to be a marriage out of friendship/necessity. Babington is fine with loving Esther more and hoping she’ll grow to love him. This quickly changes with a scene where we see the two looking very much in love. While this show only used Jane Austen’s unfinished novel as a stepping stone and became a lot more modern (than most fans liked), I thought it did a nice job with several aspects. The main one being Esther’s character. It is a show that I will definitely be re-watching and will always be upset that it did not get a second season. 

6. Legends of Tomorrow: Ava and Sara

A great ship since Ava was introduced. These two balance each other out so well and are one of the most constant ships on the show. (As the Waverider’s doors continue to be revolving in recent seasons.) Each season we watch their relationship deepen and I truly felt that with this most recent season of Legends. Now this might sound super ironic, because from what I can remember (remember 2020 brain, it’s been a while since watching), Sara was off the Waverider a lot, leaving Ava in charge. Sara was away for so many episodes that I started to question (and do a lot of Google searching) if she was leaving the show. Despite the two being a part, I feel we got to know Ava’s character more. She has definitely grown since we first met her all those seasons ago. Due to this development, I felt this couple deserved this spot on the list. When we got to the end of last season ***SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS*** and it looked like Sara (and actually all the Legends) might die, my heart broke for them. Ava and Sara deserve the world. And with the way the finale ended it’s going to be some time till they get it. Once again, Legends is the best CW Superhero show (I said it) and everyone should be watching it.

5. The Spanish Princess: Mary Tudor and Charlie Brandon 

This ship is so underappreciated and deserves to be talked about more!!! (Another common thread in many of these entries.) I have searched for Tumblr posts and YouTube videos and have only found a few dedicated to this couple. There needs to be more!! As the second season of the Spanish Princess dragged for me a bit, once Mary Tudor and Charlie Brandon got more screen time and a plot-line I was instantly sucked in. They nicely balanced the falling out of love of Katherine and Harry. There should have been more scenes with Mary and Charlie. Right away, you could feel some sort of chemistry, but Mary had to be married to the King of France. Then the King dies and she’s promised to pick a marriage of love for her second marriage. Knowing her brother and expecting that she will be married off again she marries the messenger come to get her from France, Charlie Brandon. Super intrigued by their story I looked up the history of the real Mary and Charlie Brandon and their story matches very closely. They got married despite the King’s rules and had many children together. It seems to be a marriage of love like she wanted. This couple will forever be one of my favorites. 

They are also one of my major reasons for wanting to watch the Tudors. While they completely change the Mary and Charles romance (Firstly by naming her Margaret), at least it was very easy to watch. As Charles Brandon is played by the beautiful Henry Cavill. 

4. The Outpost: Talon and Garret

Speaking of underappreciated ships (and TV shows), I present Talon and Garret from CW’s The Outpost. It was SO HARD for me to find a picture from the third (and latest season) of them to put with this post. It’s even hard to watch any scenes of the show on YouTube. Talon and Garret FINALLY got together this season and it was ABOUT TIME! Since season 1 you have felt the tension between these two, but there were always obstacles and people in between them. There seemed to be potential in the first season and by the start of third I was not holding out hope anymore that they would be together. So, it was such a joyous occasion when they became endgame (is that too soon to say? I have no idea if there’s another season on the horizon). This couple solidified my love for a WARRIOR romance. One where, despite being two different genders (and for this show species), both partners are equal in strength and fighting ability. (Well, Talon could take Garret, but they are such a powerful duo!) I now want to read and watch more romances/ships with this trope. [Please let me know if you have any suggestions.] Just talking about them, I can’t help but smile (almost as big as Garret when he saw Talon again before she left for another mission). At the end of the season they might have tried to make it seem like they would pick other partners and I’m so glad they didn’t. You seriously need to watch this show if any of the above sounded appealing/you like high fantasy and maybe a little CGI cheesiest. 

3. The Society: Grizz and Sam

It breaks my heart talking about this ship ever since Netflix released that they were taking back the second season renewal of The Society. I started watching the Society during quarantine (shocking I know), but I do remember a lot from my time watching (more shocking, right?). Hands down the best couple from this show was Grizz and Sam. They weren’t introduced right away and again I might have cheated when I suspected the two might get together, so I looked up some spoilers. (Honestly, that’s the best sign of a ship in my book. If I can’t wait and need to look up spoilers then your show has a good thing going.) Individually Grizz and Sam were my favorite characters and then pairing them together I was dead. So many amazing moments with them. Naturally we didn’t get enough and I will continue to watch fan videos (because there are so many). They are precious and I’m so glad we got some closure at the end of the season because if we didn’t this cancellation would have been even harder. 

2. Nancy Drew: Nancy and Ace

Okay, I’ll try to keep this brief because I know I’ve talked about this couple A LOT on this page in 2020 (but that might be difficult FYI). From an honorable mention thought last year to #2 this year-THAT’S HUGE! But they deserve it, even if they haven’t officially become a couple on the show...well not yet. Early on in the first season I felt a pull between these two characters, which is super ironic seeing as how they had few scenes together and were a part of two different romances. (I mean Nancy had two different love interests.) I thought I was just imagining things (as I do often pair people who barely share plots), but then episode 14 happened and I was sold. Then I came onto Tumblr and discovered the amount of people that felt it too and knew we had something. Shout out to all the other blogs that mention Nace or are made just to honor this amazing duo. I know they will be endgame too and value all your posts that I’m constantly liking and looking for. 

Again, there’s so much I could talk about, but I’ll focus on how much they trust and listen to one another. (I mean Ace drank that stuff because he trusted Nancy!!!) I love how they get paired up on cases and go into investigator mode. They speak SO CLOSE to one another and just all the looks! If we don’t get more moments in the second season I don’t know how I’ll survive. They are just so perfect and I could easily see them become number 1 next year. I cannot wait for the start of season 2 on Jan. 20th!! For now I’ll fast forward through old episodes and watch my favorite moments. Like these:

AND NUMBER ONE.... DRUM ROLL PLEASE...

1. Anne with an E: Anne and Gilbert

Now I know what you’re thinking...’Stephanie, didn’t you pick Shirbert last year too?’ Why, yes that is true. But back then I had only watched seasons 1 and 2 with some spoiler videos of season 3. The release hadn’t come to Netflix yet. Since then, I have watched the last season (and the show as a whole multiple times). It’s just so good and watching the growth of the characters (not only Shirbert) means so much more when you can watch the episodes back to back. But we’re here for Shirbert and how we watched them rise. Yes, it departed from the novel, but I love the twists and turns it took getting to endgame. So many looks and unspoken feelings. I thought it was great how Anne discovered her feelings. I hated Winifred, but understood her purpose. Anne and Gilbert will always be one of my top OTPs no matter which adaptation. Of course, the book will always be the tops, but so many great representations of it have been done on screen. Ultimate enemies to friends to lovers. I hope to one day create characters that could be so strong and beloved. 

[natromanxoff]

Queen live at Dallas Convention Center in Dallas, TX, USA - October 28, 1978

(x)

Before the concert, the promo video for their new single Fat Bottomed Girls (directed by Dennis De Vallance) is filmed.

This is the first show of Queen's tour supporting their new album "Jazz" (although the LP isn't to be released for a couple weeks), and their stage show has once again changed dramatically. Their new lighting rig has rows of lights that are so warm underneath that it has earned the nickname "pizza oven." At the beginning and end of the show, when the lighting rig rises and descends respectively, the intense heat from all the lights is felt by audience members in the first few rows.

Five new songs from the Jazz album are heard tonight. Let Me Entertain You, If You Can't Beat Them and Dreamers Ball are new to the audience, but Fat Bottomed Girls and Bicycle Race were released as a single a couple weeks earlier.

After the house lights go down, the show now opens with thunder being heard (as recorded by Brian May, and heard at the end of "Dead On Time" from the Jazz album), and Brian walking on stage first to play the opening chords of the fast version of We Will Rock You.

This Dallas version of Let Me Entertain You is the closest to the record it would sound before it was developed into the blistering #2 live number. After the song, Freddie tells the audience that this is the first show of the American tour. "We have got a lot of new material for you, and you obviously are the first audience who are gonna listen to it. So anything might happen tonight, just about anything."

Many older songs are dropped from the setlist to accomodate the newer material, but no other older songs are introduced or revived. For this first show, Let Me Entertain You and If You Can't Beat Them are performed successively, but soon Somebody To Love would be placed between them, as the band felt they should separate the new songs.

Brian introduces Death On Two Legs after If You Can't Beat Them, but Freddie jumps in as there is a discrepancy with the setlist (perhaps even with the sound man as well, as Freddie's piano mic needs to be turned up a great deal after he starts speaking). "We're not gonna do that just yet. I'll kill you when I get in the dressing room!" he jokes to Brian. He continues, "We're gonna do a song... we're gonna do Death On Two Legs, don't worry, but before we do that, I'd like to do a song I like." This amuses the audience. "This is called Somebody To Love."

The band sound a little rusty tonight at times, being the first show of the tour. They have some trouble getting into I'm In Love With My Car, and it takes an extra couple bars before they're back together again. Two songs are cut from the medley for this tour, and they add a portion of Bicycle Race to it.

To queue the band out of the middle section of Get Down Make Love, Roger Taylor now blows a whistle from behind the drum kit.

Freddie, after Now I'm Here: "A lot of people call this next song Spread Your Legs. It started off being called Spread Your Wings, but you can call it what you'd like."

For the acoustic set on this tour, an additional smaller stage is lowered for the band to play on. A scaled-down 5-piece drum kit is there for Roger to play on Dreamers Ball and '39. On this drum kit the News Of The World robot remains the bass drum head, but his main kit now sports the Jazz album logo. But for some reason, within a few shows he would revert back to the robot for the rest of the North American leg and ultimately switch back to the Jazz logo in Europe 1979.

During the instrumental section of Dreamers Ball, Brian and Roger play some vocal brass. During Brian's "trombone" solo, Freddie, clearly excited by this new addition to their show, says, "Listen to that!" Roger isn't doing his 'muted trumpet' part yet this early in the tour (although he would be by New York).

On each side of the stage, there is a runway stretching out a few rows into the audience. It would be used for key points in the show, like the first verse of It's Late, which features only Freddie and Brian, each on his own runway. The smaller stage is raised back up to its original position at this point, adding to the drama and building to the next peak of the show.

The opening night of the tour is only an hour and forty-five minutes long, but Now I'm Here and the Brighton Rock jam would get longer over time, bringing the show closer to two hours, and sometimes beyond. Tonight's compact version of Brighton Rock reveals the Brian/Roger/John jam in its infancy. This is the first concert where Roger would play the tympani. He plays it the same general spot of the show as he would for the next couple years, but it isn't a feature spot for him just yet this early in the tour.

Roger plays the drum intro to Sheer Heart Attack in the wrong spot (did they not have a setlist written for the drummer?!). Freddie urges him to "cool it" and then introduces the debut concert performance of Fat Bottomed Girls. "You're a good audience, and you can take all the new numbers," he insists. "Would you like a new song?" They definitely would, judging by their positive response. The bulk of the song goes well, although the band barely manage to finish the song together. From here onward, before the last cycle of the improvised section, Freddie would solve the problem by singing "one more time."

The flow of Sheer Heart Attack into Keep Yourself Alive is quite unique.

Bohemian Rhapsody is the last song of the set proper. Freddie sings it beautifully, and it leaves the audience screaming for more.

Tie Your Mother Down is used as an encore number for the first time (they used it as an encore a few more times in the early 80s). They finish the show with We Will Rock You and We Are The Champions. The pair of rock anthems would finish most of Queen's concerts through 1986, as well as their later collaborations into the 21st century.

The first pic is by Peter Hince, head of the Queen crew. The pictures of Freddie in his silver lurex suit were taken by John Rodgers. The black and white photos were taken by (and copyrighted to) Curtis Smith.

[pluviophile-bookworm]

High School Musical: The Musical: The Series: The Rewatch pt. 4

I really need a pick-me-up after 2x11, and I feel like 1x7 might be what I'm looking for, so here I am again with another HSMTMTS rewatch. I'm genuinely so excited for both of these episodes, so without further ado, let's jump right into

1x6: She stands for... lies, pressure and very inappropriate suggestions (coming here after 2x11 might have been a mistake, actually)

I honestly don't get why Nini's reaction to seeing Ricky in full Troy costume was so big — he actually looked pretty ok to me. Sure, the wig is a bit too much, but so what, it's cute.

Ahhh my boy Reddy is so adorable in that talking head... 'click!' Gosh, I love seeing him so cheerful! Guess he's embracing his role as part of the crew. As he should.

'I'm home'. Yes, Sebby, and you look so good, too! Gosh, I love this scene so much. I can't believe I'd forgotten about it.

Gina looks beautiful, though — I mean, she looks beautiful in anything, but I really like the Taylor look on her.

Ok, I fully understand everyone's frustration about this picture — it's genuinely so hard to get a good picture of someone jumping up in the air, and I can only imagine what it would be like with six people. A bunch of my classmates tried to do something like that ages ago and, needless to say, it didn't go very well. No good pictures were taken that day.

Ah, Portwell: the early days. Ok, but wanting something and feeling like you have to get it is far from the same thing, EJ. Honestly, these two in their early days as accomplices... this is not the first time they've been like 'X is the same thing as Y' when it's obviously not. I mean, of course, that time they became accomplices because 'we want the same thing' — which, at that point, they didn't.

Ok, but they were in such unison with that 'Not now!'... couple goals! You know, even before either of them had considered the possibility of them being a couple for real.

That's a lot of pressure that Miss Jenn is putting on dear Carlito over there. I mean, he's one of the youngest at the drama club and he has to essentially do her job for her, all while she's not even sure if she'll be able to return to her job. I just... keep reminding myself that these kids are closer in age to my little brother than they are to me (except for EJ, who is precisely in the middle), and then the pressure they're under takes on completely new proportions in my mind. None of them should have to deal with all of this. And no amount of 'trust the process' is making it better.

'Should I just live vicariously through someone else?' Oh Reddy, you should just live for yourself. I mean, the truth is I don't practice what I preach most of the time, but I really do mean this. Just go out there and live your best life. You're not Ricky's therapy dog or anything (that being said, Ricky's getting a therapy dog when?).

What part of 'a forest of boys' does Nini not get? It's simple enough. Just help Carlos do his job, how about that? I mean, he shouldn't have to do everything himself anyway.

See? He cracked. That's what happens when you put all this responsibility on a teen's shoulders and be like 'deal with it'. He was just trying his best, you guys. He did not deserve all the clapback.

Ricky's forced optimism about Miss Jenn and the show is too much even for me. Sure, I know everything turns out mostly alright at the end, but this just sounds like Ricky's on the verge of a breakdown. You know, every time someone's been too unrealistically positive on this show, it has ended in a breakdown. And that's the last thing I want.

I do agree about the simple acoustic version of the song, though. Sometimes simple is the best option.

Major props to Carlos for going up to Mr. Mazzara like that. If someone had bullied me, and especially if that someone was a teacher, I'd never have dared to call them 'Benjamin Mazarra!' to their face. Even when he's on the verge of despair, this boy is still the boldest. And we love him for that.

Is this where the 'Carlos Surname' joke started, though? I had forgotten. It was funny while it lasted.

Ricky doesn't know it yet, but he's seriously playing with Gina's feelings there. And I don't blame him because, again, he doesn't know yet, but I still feel bad for her.

'Despite the 4.3 GPA, I'm actually an idiot.' — EJ is high intelligence, low wisdom, confirmed. Not that this is news, but I really don't remember much about this season, so I'm pointing this out now.

Now forgive me if I'm not feeling for Miss Jenn after 2x11... she did some really unforgivable things there. Still, as much as I want to say a real qualified teacher would not do any of that, my personal experience suggests otherwise, quite unfortunately. Miss Jenn might not be very emotionally mature, but not having legal teaching credentials is not her biggest issue, really. It is precisely her lack of emotional maturity.

OMG, Big Red accidentally invited the entire drama club over! And that, I guess, is half of how Redlyn established themselves as the hosts of every out-of-school drama club gathering. Thanksgiving is, of course, the other half. Gosh, those two were the parents of the drama club even before they were a couple. Guess they're soulmates in that way, too.

Ok, so I didn't comment on this after 2x8 when Big Red did it to Ricky, but now that I finally notice that Seb did it to Carlos, too (I took my time, thanks), I need to talk about the knee touch thing. See, this is exactly the amount of touch I used to be comfortable with (since I'm very touch-averse) — both on the giving and on the receiving end — and it can mean so much when you feel bad. It's a subtle 'hey, I'm here, it's going to be fine', a sort of hug-without-the-hugging... I feel like this is a gesture we don't see enough of in media and it can feel just as intimate as, say, holding hands or cuddling. I don't want to talk about kissing because I don't know anything about it. But I just love how we've got the knee touch depicted by both a romantic pairing and a platonic pairing in the show. Ok, rant over. But I just really wanted to talk about this because, well, I saw myself in it.

'Her past is a little bit sketchy'... I see, Ash has already started writing Truth, Justice and Songs in Our Key, even if she doesn't know it quite yet.

Miss Jenn finding out Mike is Ricky's dad is just as awkward as it should be. Whatever they had going on should have ended right then and there.

'... people in the dramatic arts are insane' — 'Thank you.' — Umm, Miss Jenn, you are not really helping your case there. Quite frankly, you're lucky you've got the allegiance of the entire drama club. I don't think they'd have your back as much after 2x11, though.

Ok, but... Big Red wearing a longcoat just to take it off for the dramatic flair of it all? An icon if I've ever seen one. Also, mad props to Larry for apparently learning this number in record time after Dara got injured.

Oh, and... mad props to all the kids in-universe for writing, rehearsing, and learning this entire number in one night.

So both Seb and Natalie have solo lines in the song... and Seb was promoted to main in s2. So does this mean Natalie will get the same treatment in s3? I mean, that will probably mean they'll try to stick her in some sort of romantic plot, and I really don't need that, but I really, really want her to be a main character.

Also, let's not forget we had our first Redlyn moment in this number... seeing them dance together makes my heart jump with joy!

I won't lie, though, the entire dance number and everything was just a little bit uncomfortable to watch after 2x11... these kids do so much for Miss Jenn, and what does she do? Put insane amounts of pressure on some of them, shuts others down at every attempt to put in a word, favours yet others despite their abysmal performance at the audition, and then has the audacity to tell that same person to jump off of something high, with all the implications attached? Not that I'm naming any names, of course. Ok, this has taken a sudden and uncalled for turn for the dark, so I guess I'll just move right along to the next episode now.

1x7: A world where 'That was terrible!' and 'I'm so happy!' can both be true at the same time

My girl Ash is doing the recap! And she's a pun queen, too. 'Miss Jenn was in hot water, Carlos was a hot mess...' — not pleasant, but so true. But wbk. Ashlyn is the best.

And... Ricky and Nini's on and off chemistry is back on. Good for them, because after season 2, I really needed to see a good rehearsal. But I'm thinking EJ's joy at the end-of-school bell had little to do with Thanksgiving...

That look Reddy gave Ashlyn as she was walking out... might be me digging for breadcrumbs, but I think I just saw the exact moment my boy fell, and he fell hard. Ok, I realise now after I've said this that 'fall' probably isn't the best choice of words, but you know what I mean. Fell for Ashlyn. Not like... oh, never mind.

'So meek, so mild, sword!' I can't really explain it, but I love this line. And I feel like it describes Ash so perfectly: like, she might be meek and mild, but if you cross her, she's armed. Gosh, I love her!

Not the Caswell parents leaving their children alone over two holiday breaks! No wonder these two are the way they are. But they're about to get a beautiful Thanksgiving celebration. [Fun personal fact: the year I was born, my birthday fell on Thanksgiving day. That doesn't mean much in Bulgaria, but my dad works with a lot of Americans so my parents knew about it and I've known this and that about this holiday I've never celebrated since I was very young. I have no idea why I'm telling you this, but Thanksgiving has always reminded me of my birthday for this reason, so... ok, moving on.]

So I know she kind of suggested it, but... why does Carlos think it's his place to invite people over to Ashlyn's? I mean, this was part 2 of Redlyn establishing themselves as the hosts for any out-of-school gathering, but... oh well, it led to a beautiful party with everyone, so... I'll allow it.

I really liked Nini's talk with her grandma. It was really nice, and a very fitting way to remind everyone what Thanksgiving is originally about. I feel like people often forget that when it comes to... literally every major commercialised holiday.

Wow, EJ really is that person where once the tap is open, it can't stop spilling. And I kind of like that look on him. It's a transitional stage between EJ 1.0 and EJ 2.0, and I appreciate it for what it is.

Ahhhh it's Redlyn's first proper 1-on-1 conversation! I mean, it got kind of really awkward really quickly because of — surprise, surprise — Nini and Ricky (and EJ), but those two are so adorable! No more breadcrumbs — we're about to get an entire five-course meal here! Which goes really well with the Thanksgiving setting, now that I think of it.

Gosh, they've never really talked and my boy whips out the 'the only thing I'd ever throw at your face is a brighter spotlight' line right off the bat? Boy is whipped! But like, he is the master of grand gestures where Ashlyn is concerned. Still, in this first moment they shared, he really was like, go big or go home, and home isn't really an option here. But I should have known, it's in his name after all. Gosh, I love both of those two so much! Especially when they're together.

Ok, so... this is a really bad way to meet your mother's new boyfriend. Poor Ricky. As if ringing his mum wasn't hard enough already.

See, when I rewatch season 1, I get where the Rina stans are coming from, but then again, remember when I used to say I wanted Gina and EJ to just be friends? Yeah, that's changed too. Not that I ever shipped Rina romantically — I rarely ever ship a pairing unless they're explicitly stated to have something going on, just because I can't see that sort of stuff very clearly — but I really, really want them (Ricky and Gina, I mean) to be really good friends. Once they get past the awkwardness of their sort of history, I mean.

I miss the good old days when Nini was a nice person... I mean, we kind of (really) had a glimpse of that in 2x11 (I'm guessing she was making up for Miss Jenn's very inappropriate slip-up), but I miss the days before she was this big internet-famous songwriter and actually had to be convinced by Ashlyn that she should write songs for herself... wait, now that I think of it... Ashlyn might have helped create a monster there. Oh well. Still love her so much!

You know, I love the Choosical, but it's all a bit sad, if you stop to think about it for a sec. Just picture little single-digit-aged Carlito making this whole thing up in an attempt to participate in his favourite thing... only to not have anyone to play with for the next ten years. Great, I just made myself cry. The thing is, I relate to that story a bit too much. I remember in preschool, when the rest of the children would play together, I'd sit in a corner by myself and read the only book that was there... over and over, day after day. I don't even remember a single thing about that little book right now, but back then I clung to it like it was everything. And I couldn't very much share the experience with any of my peers, seeing as I was the only kid there who could actually read (my grandma used to be a preschool teacher and she taught me to read when I was 4). So yeah. I went off on a rather personal tangent there. Thing is, I know how little Carlos felt and I'm so happy that he finally gets to share this thing he made with a loving and supportive group of friends. Everything has its time and place, I guess.

'Look, I'm not following Big Red just because he paid me a compliment' — of course not, dear, you know your own worth and we love that for you — but see, when he said that thing that you're referring to as a compliment, he did not lie! You really are the brightest star and deserve the brightest spotlight. See, the thing I love most about Redlyn's compliments to each other is that they're so sincere and state nothing but the absolute truth. Those two just see each other for what they are, and love each other as they are. And I think that is beautiful.

It's so funny to me every time someone gets something wrong and Carlos just walks past them out of nowhere and corrects them without missing a beat. I kind of relate to that side of him, too. Except it's usually about grammar and language in my case, not HSM trivia.

If I were Nini in this scene, and was suddenly put face to face with Emily on the spot like that, I would not have been able to handle it. So props to Nini for handling it.

Yeah, sorry to break it to you, Emily dear, but whatever you're doing is not a Cockney accent. I don't claim to be an accent expert, but I know first-hand what Cockney sounds like and... that's just not it. Even Dick Van Dyke was closer to a Cockney accent in Mary Poppins, and that's saying something. (See, I feel bad criticising any aspect of Emily because her actress is no longer with us, but... I have no idea who let them get away with passing this off as Cockney).

Is this the beginning of Jennzara there? I am loving this.

Of course Carlos was obsessed with Glee as a kid... but wasn't he a bit too young for it when it aired? I know I was, and I'm older than those kids. I mean, I waited until I was emotionally mature enough to watch Glee, and that wasn't until 3 years ago, when I was 18 going on 19. Ok, I'm thinking too much into this. Moving on.

Ahhhhh, Redlyn! Just... all of their moments. But screaming the lyrics of What I've Been Looking For on top of their lungs while looking right at each other... was so beautiful to watch. Give me more of that!

EJ: 'That was terrible.' Seb: 'I'm so happy!' — Moods, both of them. Those two are real-life emojis, aren't they? And we love them for that.

'... without laughing... or killing each other.' — I feel like that last specification was needed given that it's Ricky and EJ we're talking about, and especially what happened last time they had to do a one-on-one exercise during rehearsal. The ensuing scene, however, is the most hilarious thing!

Root beer, huh? Is that the HSMTMTS code for 'awkward' now? I mean, Nini and Gina had a nice talk there, all things considered. I really want the two of them to put the Ricky thing past them and be friends... but we'll see.

Gina is trying to make the sleepover thing look like 'it's not a big deal' despite how big of a deal it obviously is to her... to which I say, good for you, girl, but I wouldn't know. The only sleepovers I've ever had have been with my little cousin who is 9 years younger than me and also insists on sleeping with a very bright nightlight on, which means I can't sleep at all. So yeah, I wouldn't know. But I'm happy that Gina is feeling included.

So this is the exact moment when it becomes clear that Big Red is not telling us the complete truth when it comes to his HSM knowledge... '14 and 10'? Even I didn't know that. I knew 14, but... for someone who allegedly 'hates musicals', my boy has very detailed knowledge of one certain musical movie... I love how it got him a certain girl's attention, though. Not that she wasn't already paying attention to him, if you catch my drift.

Ok, but this hits even harder now than it did the first time — just when Gina has finally managed to make friends, to feel included in their group, her mum has to move her away again. This is straight-up tragic. I'll say it now, and I'll probably say it again when it comes up in the rewatch — Ashlyn is an absolute queen for taking Gina in for the next semester.

'That's sort of what you always do, huh? Take care of everyone else' — yeah, Ash, and you do the same. You two just need someone to do for you what you do for other people. See, guys, this is what I mean. This is why they're soulmates. Because in a world that has more or less forced both of them to put others first, they put each other first. They each get to be the most important person to each other after they've been stepping back for others all the time. And if that isn't beautiful, I don't know what is. I know I'm repeating myself over and over saying this, but... they own my heart and soul and I'm not for sale.

Ok, but Ashlyn's little run after Big Red left was so cute! Girl is... I don't know why I keep using that word, but... falling.

Unpopular opinion: Out of the Old is the best Nini solo to come out of this series to date. Maybe I feel that way just because I relate to it most, but hey, that is a valid reason to like something.

Oof, EJ's losing followers. Oh well, if they're unfollowing him for being too honest, they didn't like the real him to begin with. So good riddance to them.

Yikes... Jennzara fell asleep with flammable stuff left unattended... we all know how that ended, but just the fact that they felt comfortable enough to fall asleep in each other's presence... speaks volumes. So I guess... well, I don't know what exactly I'm saying regarding the fire they caused, but I loved this big little moment they had.

So this is it. That was 1x6 and 7 and, well, they were beautiful, but there are some parts I can't look at in the same way anymore after 2x11. Guess that's the risk of a rewatch. The Redlyn scenes, though — still the best part of both of these episodes. That and a couple of other things for which I don't need to pretend like I haven't seen season 2.