#gahan

[clawbehavior]

zero context WIP game! thanks for the tags @killerandhealerqueen and @fourth-quartet 🥰🥰

i'm playing fast and easy with the rules of this one (which you can find here). instead, you'll find numbered snippets from a bunch of WIPs i am 75-90 per cent done but ambivalent about which to update first. gahan readers, what interests you most?

--

1. even gods can't change the past

gaon stares listlessly at the stickers lining the base of the night lamp. despite repeated disinfectings, they haven't come off, dinosaurs, trucks, sparkly muffins. things he had put there to make their hospital stay livelier. 

'i guess we're even now,' soohyun says, quiet and mostly to herself. 

gaon thinks for a while. 'chief jo?' he guesses. soohyun had a girlish fascination with her mentor that in turn made the normally gruff man go tongue tied. 

'what -- no. jishin,' she says as if this explains anything. when gaon looks over at his wife sitting on the bed beside him, she looks guilty, sad, and relieved. the guilt is most prominent. 

'what --' says gaon, having to swallow because his mouth is suddenly dry. 'are you talking about?'

----

2. unnamed modern strangers in a bar au

the stranger backs gaon up until he hits the brick wall behind them, none too gently. but the man pays no attention to this. he looks at gaon with desire both ferocious and unyielding. 

'this husband of yours,' says the stranger angrily, sliding his hands into gaon's thick hair and keeping them there. 'you talk about him like he walks on water but he's only a man.'

'he's my world,' replies gaon breathlessly, eyes fixed on the man's mouth. then the stranger is kissing him. 

---

3. omega spin-off of enantiomers

gaon spins in yohan's arms so they're back to chest, before sensuously dragging himself down yohan's front until he's crouched at yohan's feet. yohan's hands tighten around his when gaon looks up at him from the floor, smilingly and with heat. 

'that look is why i put a baby inside you the first time around,' yohan says, stroking gaon's hands. there's a hint of warning to his tone. and desperation. he can't be held responsible for what he does if gaon keeps this up. 

gaon laughs delightedly.

of course, that's when the bedroom emits a wail that filters down the hallway and into the living room.

--

4. everything everywhere all at once

soohyun's eyebrows go up in shock. 'you still love him,' she says accusingly. 'not just that -- you want to go back to him. your parents died because of kang yohan!' she yells this last part, stomping her feet in enraged helplessness. 

'good people die without good reason,' gaon replies, feeling his cheeks redden.

she looks at gaon like he's grown another head. 'are you listening to yourself right now? you'll forgive kang yohan, and for what? he broke your heart. you were devastated for weeks!'

'i'm not selfless, soohyun-yah. not like you,' gaon replies, voice cracking. he searches for the words, pulling them from deep inside him. 'after appa died, i kept the restaurant open to prove that i could. helping people came after. but i can't do it anymore. i can't keep dragging on like everything is normal when seeing how fucked up everything is is destroying me.'

soohyun visibly swallows her words, letting gaon finish. 

'i hurt,' gaon whispers, 'all the time. i'm so angry. it's like looking into an abyss but now it looks back at me. being with yohan makes me feel safe, like i'll survive this. like there's more to living than just pain.'

soohyun hunches over at the knees and hugs herself. 'why does it have to be kang yohan?' she says miserably.

'i don't know.' gaon approaches, choreographing his intent. he pulls her into a hug when she doesn't resist. 'it's fucked up. i'm fucked up but i miss him terribly.'

'what if he breaks your heart again?' she sniffles against gaon's chest, voice going flat with inevitability. 

'he might,' gaon admits, squeezing her in final consolation. 'but i'll go my whole life regretting it if i don't try.'

--

5. elevator troubles

‘bujangnim?’ gaon asks, knocking on the heavy wooden door for appearance’s sake before striding in. but yohan’s not there.

the sound of his harsh breathing fills the office. he makes his way over to where late afternoon sunlights spills through the floor to ceiling windows and stares at the traffic twenty stories below, tiny trucks and tinier people. 

he's livid. if he could, he would shatter every single window of this ministry building with the frequency of his rage.

a hand slips over his eyes, cooling their heat and blocking his vision. a body follows behind. 

‘shhh,’ rumbles yohan in gaon’s ear, moulding himself around gaon, silken wool and heat and support everywhere. his other hand lands on gaon's chest, over gaon's fast beating heart. 

gaon’s only reaction is a hitch in his breathing. his muscles remain tightly coiled, his hands clenched in fists at his sides.

'he told me that my parents would be proud of me for doing the right thing,' gaon says with long pauses between into the red blackness. 'when he -- when he was the one who helped doh young choon --' he breaks off with a stifled sound, enraged.  

yohan's joyless chuckle rumbles through gaon's body. 'min jung ho is a viper.' his inflection doesn't change when gaon grabs his wrist. 'down to his venomous words.'

'what gives him the right,' gasps gaon, eyes turning wet with frustrated tears under yohan's palm. he presses back into yohan's body. 

'none,' says yohan simply. 'just as he has no right to dispense justice.'

'i want to hurt him, so, so badly,' gaon confesses, pulling yohan's hand away. 

‘we will,’ says yohan. 

future promises aren't enough. gaon whirls around. 'now, yohan.' he pushes the unresisting older man backwards until yohan's thighs hit the heavy oak table. 'i want to destroy him now.' 

---

6. my heart goes back to you, i just don't know

trigger warning, beware.

jung sunah pulls gaon’s face up with a fistful of silky, dark hair. gaon’s pupils are blown wide. yohan catches a peek of red tongue as gaon swallows, sweat beading along the younger man’s temple. yohan knows this expression from when he looked into the mirror all those weeks ago after jung sunah had ambushed him. 

she drugged gaon.

yohan watches with a foreboding feeling as jung sunah simply stares at gaon. the hunger on her face is…not good. she cocks her head, hand traveling to gaon’s panting mouth. yohan watches her fit two perfectly manicured fingers, nails painted rouge into the seam of gaon’s mouth; feels somehow worse when gaon doesn’t resist. 

‘he’s nothing! a means to an end,‘ barks yohan. he sounds affected because he is. he knows what’s happening here, what jung sunah is making him a bystander to.

she ignores this. ‘you know, i never liked giving blowjobs,’ she says conversationally. ‘they’re demeaning. the power differential is obvious. men enjoy it.’  she tilts gaon’s face up using the fingers in his mouth.

gaon pants heavily, eyelashes turning wet as he blinks slow and hard. ‘seeing kim pansanim on his knees makes me understand the appeal of it.’

‘is that why you brought him here?’ yohan asks, thinking quickly. ‘to get to me?’

‘you put your hand on his shoulder on live television,’ she replies in a faraway voice, but yohan can read her now.

--

tagging @technitango @tenderlywicked @rocknghorss @thedeviljudges @briwates @mid-n0vember @eyesof-kkomi feel free to pass ofc and if you are a writer who enjoys being tagged, lmk so i can include you in the future

[frances-and-the-moon]

I put together some ao3 tags that I found here and the last one omg

[sofapup17]

Homoerotically staring into your eyes and promising that I'll find out whatever you're hiding you murderer

[yilinglaozu]

@asiandramanet creator bingo — transition & quote

(insp.)

[fr-wiwiw]

I am alive! Just... not that active on tumblr. I draw these to de-stress I miss GaHan so much /sigh/ Idk if my visibility here still exist or not lol it's dusted /wipes away/

[lienwyn]

Look. I think we all knew this would happen eventually. And by "this" I mean both someone pulling on those suspenders AND Ga On getting railed on top of that desk.

You're welcome.

[thisautistic]

Jinyoung as Gaon, crying, in The Devil Judge

Bonus: Gaon hitting his thigh while he's crying

[sanpape]

gaon's law professor hated gaon's gay situationship so much he litterally propped up a fascist regime to stop it

[spicyvampire]

VALENTINE'S WEEK WITH : THE DEVIL JUDGE (2021)

“[...] And I will not be afraid of your scars. I know sometimes it’s still hard to let me see you in all your cracked perfection, but please know: whether it’s the days you burn more brilliant than the sun or the nights you collapse into my lap your body broken into a thousand questions, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I will love you when you are a still day. I will love you when you are a hurricane.” ― Clementine von Radics

[thedeviljudges]

original post @yohankang

gaon yelling out bujangnim but quickly dropping the formality by screaming kang yohan because of the dire situation and the growing panic that yohan is going to die and he’s leaving gaon and he can’t go with yohan. that is a man scared of losing a loved one, someone he cherishes so much, even after all the fights and terrible decisions between the two of them. nothing says love more than this scene. 🥺

[magicaldragons]

peak romance is saying "be on my side"

"All I wanted, was for you to be on my side. I would've done anything for that to happen." – kang yohan | the devil judge

"Hit me all you want, but be on my side; because even when you hit me, it's for my sake." – nam shin | are you human too?

"I thought you were on my side." – ryu shi oh | strong girl namsoon bonus: "no matter what, you must stay by my side." – ryu shi oh | strong girl nam soon

[hard-times-paramore]

I watched The Devil Judge. I'm feeling very normal.

[Template]

Edit: they didn't directly state their ages in the show, that's why I just looked up the actors' ages. If I'm wrong it's legit cause I didn't know.

[kdramastrix]

I have. Something to talk about and its very very VERY important.

We know that last scene of TDJ where its just PEAK yearning but can we PLEASE appreciate the micro-expressions that passed over both Yohan & Gaon's faces when they faced each other DIRECTLY after a MONTH (if im not wrong) of that whole blowing up fiasco + Yohan's arrest before that??????? Because my GOD.

So we see Gaon call Yohan by his Full Government Name™ (which wasn't very wise for a declared dead enemy of the state who is ALSO wanted but we'll let it pass for romanticisms' sake) and look at his face. His face is one of a scared man. He's not hesitant but he is afraid of how Yohan views him after what transpired between them.

In turn, Yohan looks back and well.

He is also somewhat apprehensive. They're both testing each other & the waters they're in. Although Yohan doesn't have a revenge vendetta shackling him down anymore, Gaon, on the other hand, has tremendous stuff to unpack. They're carefully, if not gently, evaluating the distance between them.

And then, Yohan gives a clear sign that he holds nothing against Gaon. An open arm, an open invitation. To join him? Maybe. To decide what to do with them? Perhaps. It's vague but it's also clear that Yohan is done manipulating Gaon & that he has left the ball in Gaon's court.

Then come the positive changes. With Yohan's green signal, Gaon is somewhat relieved but also incredibly guilt-ridden. I think these frames speak for themselves.

The wet smile & the eye crinkles. He is so relieved to be in Yohan's good graces but also just looking at Yohan be his ever glowing self after serving his life's purpose.

Yohan. My dearest Yohan. Look at him. He's equally heart-broken to be seeing Gaon like this, to be leaving him behind but that little nod he does???? Like he's made a decision that he needs to stick with for the betterment of Gaon???? That's what truly gets me. It's so clear the distance between them is hurting him but he also knows that it's necessary to give Gaon space & time, to unravel & to explore things on his own. Perhaps another assumption on his part because who truly knows what Gaon wants except Gaon himself?

Then it's a brief look exchanged. As he turns, giving Gaon one last reassuring smile as he turns and leaves behind one of the most important people to him.

And gaon watches. Look at his micro-expressions here. Look at his breathing. His sagging shoulders. His eyes. His wet smile. His balled hands. His tiny nods.

He also thinks this is necessary but you can so clearly see its taking every bit of nerve & fiber in him to stay rooted to his place & not chase after Yohan. He's DELIBERATELY not taking a single step towards Yohan. He thinks he doesn't deserve to chase after him, that hes content to see Yohan: alive, well and so utterly free. That's all that matters.

I would genuinely like to appreciate both jinyoung and jisung for their acting bcs they NAILED the raw emotions needed for this absolutely stunning yet gut wrenching scene. It's so difficult to convey such complex emotions through such little means yet they did it to PERFECTION. They both gave their characters LIFE. And for that i will always be grateful bcs i dont think anyone else could've done Kang Yohan and Kim Gaon the way they did.

[qpjianghu]

"When is a monster not a monster? Oh, when you love it." --Caitlyn Siehl, 'Start Here'

[captnswilson]

[fr-wiwiw]

Gahan commission for @gayautisticraccoon. Thankyou for your interest and support 🌟💖

If you guys want to see your favorite characters kissing and do fruity things drawn by me, send DMs or email ;)

visit fr-wiwiw.carrd.co for more information!