#garf on the run

[garfield-ontherun]

safety first!

[vampire-lord-garfield]

I'm still on my:

"With good food and constant action at the manor Bard will gain muscle mass and dad bod"

bullshit.

And because I'm a Sebard trash - the annoying bastard is also there and is into it.

(also that bitch is so dramatic - he refuses to take off his gloves even when he spends the night with Bard)

[dogwhizzer]

the way i'm only here because my mom wanted me to be in the production of charlie and the chocolate factory that the youth theater at my aunt's community college was putting on

[raspberryhell]

May I request Gonta in green apple?? (bottom right if that wasn't clear gdhsjfs)

Gonta!!! :D

[ID: A digital painting of Gonta Gokuhara from Dangan Ronpa V3. He is shown from the side with a hand up looking a lady bug crawling on his knuckles. He is wearing a light green sweater with brown overalls over it. The background is a solid teal green. End ID]

[garf-lover96]

just finished my 2nd run.... i sided with the emperor, so after we killed the brain lae'zel left me and since i defied bhaal by not becoming the absolute, yarrow had to kill himself before he got the chance to convince wyll to go to avernus with karlach.... my biggest regret is leaving astarion without a goodbye because what the fuck is he to do now..

playing dark urge was the most stressful experience of my life, i won't be doing it again!

(i have 184 hours in bg3 now)

[haunted-plush]

I MISS SKYLANDERSSSSSSSSS

[waterfishlol0]

hi i cant sleep im too busy thinking about smiley fries.. kevin eats those daily i know him personally. Every day it is smiley fries and dinosaur nuggets.

[bigdumbbambieyes]

“What the fuck is this?”

Steve glances back over his shoulder with a furrowed brow, spotting Billy halfway into the bed with the blanket pulled back, revealed his very old and very matted childhood stuffed Garfield plushie.

He feels his face heat in embarrassment, but he shuts his drawer in favour of going over to the bed and swiping Garfield up from the bed and into his arms, cradling him against his chest as he tells Billy with a small pout, “It’s my Garf.”

“Your Garf?” Billy lifts both of his brows, his eyes shining with mirth and his lips are twitching to hold back a smile.

Or worse, maybe a laugh.

Which makes Steve feel worse because goddammit, he forgot to hide Garfield away in his closet before Billy came over. He was usually better about it, but the new shiner under Billy’s eye had distracted him the entire drive here.

This thing between them was still new, still kinda fragile, because Billy’s just started sleeping over instead of rushing to put his pants back on after they fuck and running away like a bat out of hell.

And now Billy’s gone and seen Garf and Steve kinda wants to die.

“You sleep with a stuffed Garfield, pretty boy?” Billy taunts him quietly, that amusement still in his face.

He has since he was a kid, when he picked him off the shelf in a store he can’t remember during one of the dozens of vacations they’ve taken and showed it to his mother, who had nodded in approval.

He’s slept with Garf every night since he was six, when his parents were gone and his babysitter was in the guest room. Or when his parents would leave him alone, in this big house, for a weekend or more.

Or even when his parents were home and he still felt alone.

He finds himself rubbing Garfield’s ear, soothing himself as he stares at Billy and nods quietly.

And Billy probably sees his embarrassment now, in his big brown eyes, because the teasing look is gone and Billy’s kneeling on the bed now, shuffling over to the other side where Steve’s standing, and looking down at the weathered Garfield in his arms.

Billy flicks his gaze up again, meeting Steve’s eyes, and mutters, “I have my baby blanket under my pillow at home. It’s fucking scraps now, but I still have it.”

When I need it, goes unsaid, but it makes Steve smile a little.

“Can I see him?” Billy asks softly, probably the softest Steve’s ever heard him.

It’s enough to make him pass Garfield over to Billy, who looks him over quietly. Petting his ears and face, thumbing over his eyes and smile.

“I know it’s stupid,” Steve mumbles.

Billy smirks softly, probably thinking ‘yeah, it is’, but he doesn’t say it, instead he hands Garfield back and mumbles, “Whatever gives you comfort.”

Steve nods and watches Billy slip under the covers, making him comfortable, and he turns to put Garfield away in his spot in the closet when Billy asks, “He’s not sleeping with us?”

It makes Steve pause, caught a little off guard at the question, but he turns on his heel and sees Billy laying there against the pillows, his hands behind his head and quirking a brow.

Steve licks his lips, a nervous habit, and shrugs. He asks, “Is that okay?”

“I wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t.”

Steve smiles, a small thing on his face, but Billy mirrors it and reaches over to pull back the blanket on Steve’s side of the bed.

-

In the morning, Steve wakes up to the sight of Billy holding a stolen Garfield to his chest, sound asleep.

The sight fills his chest with something warm, something affectionate, something hopeful.

[chongoblog]

It’s the medley with all the Mad Rat Songs, but each one is also a mashup!

That’s 40 mashups in one!

Your Mondays have never been more mad......

Audio sources used under the cut (warning: it’s big)

SONGS USED

(Shoutouts to Garf aka @garfffffff for compiling this list)

-Funny Christmas In July Commercial: HHGregg 

-Rats Birthday Mixtape: Jerma985 

-Crawling: Linkin Park 

-Last Surprise: Shoji Mogeru, Lin 

-S.L.A.B Freestyle: Chip the Ripper 

-Look At Me Now (Busta Rhymes): Chris Brown

-Uma Thurman: Fall Out Boy 

-September: Earth Wind and Fire 

-September: The Living Tombstone 

-Gangnam Style: PSY 

-Bodies: Drowning Pool 

-MAD RAT DEAD RAP: DYES IWASKI, Johnarabushi, TOPHAMHATKYO 

-A Cruel Angel's Thesis: Yoko Takahashi 

-Anthropology: AwkwardMania 

-Other Friends: Sarah Stiles 

-Break Stuff: Limp Bizkit 

-London Bridge: Fergie 

-My Own Worst Enemy: Lit 

-It's Tricky: Run D.M.C 

-Bubblegum Bitch: Marina and the Diamonds 

-All I Want: The Offspring 

-Bitch: Meredith Brooks 

-Smooth: Santana, Rob Thomas 

-Starships: Nicki Minaj 

-Excuse My Rudeness But Could You Please RIP: Calliope Mori 

-Sexy Back: Justin Timberlake 

-Big Time Rush: Matthew Gerrard, Logan Henderson, Carlos PenaVega, James Maslow, Kendall Schmidt 

-Lose Control: Missy Elliot 

-Paralyzer: Finger Eleven 

-Black Betty: Ram Jam 

-Numb: Linkin Park 

-Freaking Out: Mystery Skulls 

-Witch Doctor: David Seville 

-Party in the USA: Miley Cyrus 

-Monkey Watch: Tsunku 

-Its Party Time: Titanic: The Animated Musical 

-Uptown Funk: Mark Ronson 

-Hollaback Girl: Gwen Stefani 

-Payphone: Maroon 5 

-Every Time We Touch: Cascada 

-GALO SENGEN: The Policemen 

-Down With the Sickness: Disturbed 

-ALKATRAZ: DEMONDICE, DYES IWASAKI 

-Feel Good Inc: Gorillaz 

-7th Element - Vitas

-BRAIN POWER: NOMA 

-Guillotine: Death Grips

-Shake That - Eminem, Nate Dogg 

-I Don't Wanna Stop: Ozzy Osborne 

-Jones BBQ Foot Massage: bigdogeatchild 

-Boombastic: Shaggy 

-Dare: Gorillaz 

-little update on the rat situation TikTok: baddiebhee 

-Lone Digger: Caravan Palace 

-THE HERO!!: Jam Project 

-Wake Me Up When September Ends: Green Day 

-How to Save a Life: The Fray 

-Fireflies: Owl City 

-Goodbye: Bo Burnham 

-Outside: Calvin Harris, Ellie Goulding

[cleolinda]

Weekend links

My posts

I have been amorphously unwell (migraines, dizziness, aches) this week, which is super great. I am, in fact, daunted by the complexities and unknowns.

See "Personal tag of the week" at the bottom for updates on the Tumblr happenings.

Reblogs of interest

Thousands of Israelis protest in Tel Aviv, demanding a hostage release/ceasefire deal and new elections.

I never know how to segue from a serious news item.

Theseus liveblogs the labyrinth, and it’s heartbreaking.

Before hbomberguy was going after plagiarism, he was playing Donkey Kong for trans rights.

“to touch is to interact, and when you put your hand on your dog the universe does not know that you are separate”

The universe knows you are separate from this cat’s Absolute Terror Field

Cats named Pigeon

The most dramatic cat

Figure out what starts your engine and ride the waves of your brain

This is not van fundamentalism

Lawful good werebears

The Godmother is not committed to the kindness

Escape room employees reveal the worst, or best, things they’ve seen on the job.

“So I explained to him the story of ‘Alice’s Restaurant,’ and he began to get MAD”

It seems that y’all do not understand that the Better Call Saul ads are just how we live in the US, and that I pass five Alexander Shunnarah billboards just to get a quesadilla. 

1) Don’t take your native animals for granted. 2) This jay is the bluebird of happiness, apparently.

Wisdom from a Tumblr longtimer

Benign chain posts: the Money Garf

Video

Every now and then I fall apaaaaaart

Click through for a massive gothic rock playlist on YouTube

It’s a great dance contest entry--but then they tell you it’s also randomly-paired improv

Capybara capybara (capybara)

The sacred texts

You have not seen a sacred internet text until you have seen the Lolrus (2006)

Personal tag of the week

“the happenings” is my tag for all internet platform bullshit. This week, it’s Tumblr, as CEO Matt Mullenweg lost his shit and started harassing a trans user (including on another platform). This is a factual explanation early in the week of what happened and how it started: 

predstrogen (the first blog) was allegedly deleted for “sexually explicit material” despite any posts that may have been labelled as such being marked with a community label and her blog recently being manually approved as NOT containing adult content. she also talks in this post, as well as here, about how she has had a support ticket open for several months for harassment she was receiving that has not been dealt with

the CEO of tumblr made a post wherin he publicly aired information regarding her deletion and threatened legal action against her , showing examples of the alleged death threats where no actual threats were made and telling people in the replies to just leave if they were unhappy with the moderation of the site

Specifically, he was upset by the expressed wish that he perish in a car covered in hammers that would explode multiple times, a serious threat that could surely come to fruition in reality. If you can't tell that I'm being sarcastic, congratulations, you're CEO material.

It spiraled from there, but suffice it to say, it ended with trans employees posting on the Staff account (reblog here with commentaries):

The reality of predstrogen’s suspension was not accurately conveyed, and made it seem like we were reaching for opportunities to ban trans feminine people on the platform. This is not the case. The example comment shared in the post linked above does not meet our definition of a realistic threat of violence, and was not the deciding factor in the account suspension. Matt thereafter failed to recognize the harm to the community as a result of this suspension. Matt does not speak on behalf of the LGBTQ+ people who help run Tumblr or Automattic, and we were not consulted in the construction of a response to these events.

While the post is sincerely emotional and brave, the real chess move is this part:

We appreciate the space we have been given to express our concerns and dissent, and we are thankful that Matt’s (and Automattic’s) strong commitment to freedom of expression has facilitated it. We will continue to fight to make Tumblr safe for us all.

Matt Mullenweg now either has to nod and go, “Yeah, yeah... I’m a great guy committed to freedom...” Or he can, I don’t know, shut the site down in a fit of defiant pique? All I’m going to say about this is that the day all this first went down, I started archiving any posts I’d put significant effort into last year, and I’ll be crossposting them on Dreamwidth and Patreon. I don’t want to lose Tumblr’s culture and unique platform--I mean, I think the Weekend Links themselves make a case for the fact that there is nothing else like Tumblr on the internet. And shutting down is not even necessarily the most likely outcome--but I’m not gonna be caught unprepared, either. 

[garfield-ontherun]

oh, what to order...

[cuprohastes]

The Choir

Garf was watching something intently on her tablet with Un-Name Male in the Cafeteria, half-eaten Purple Breadroll in one hand.

Dave the Human ambled up in his Atrix overalls ("They're really comfy") and queried today's topic.

Garf flipped around the tablet. "I'm watching this. How long does it take Humans to learn to do this?" she asked.

Dave pressed play:

"Oh, they're not trained." he said. "Humans just do that."

"Grak?!" said Un-named male.

"OK. But... really though?" Garf Asked.

Dave said "Sure! You need a conductor and to let people know you asking them to sing though."

Well Dave The Human got called on account of everyone knew this was Dave The Human's sort of shenanigans, and besides she was on the same shift rota.

"Grak." commented Un-named Male, and Garf couldn't disagree Whatever was happening it was interesting.

They bribed Dave The Human with purple rolls and salted butter, showed her the video, and she said, "Ok this sounds fun. I'm not sure if this is a joke - because I'm pretty sure you can't really play a group of humans as an instrument. So... who's about? OK let's see... Hey EVA 43, Sam, Emmy... got a moment?"

They did. They clustered up. The Daves showed them the video. "You game?" the human Dave asked. They looked at each other and Emmy said "Sure!"

And so on that shift for the next half hour the faint sound of the only Human Deep Space Ad-Hoc choir could be heard faintly through the station, running through classic Tsin melodies, and also at least one movie theme that Dave was fond of.

"Well." said Garf, "I guess Humans do Just Do That."

"Grak." said Un-Named Male, and he wasn't wrong.

[the-martyrfication-of-the-matron]

Garroth and Zenix but they have the dynamic of me and my cat

Poor bastard came in sopping wet and I had to run after him with a towel and even after I swaddled him up he was still clawing at my shoulders for freedom

I know he is capable of savagery beyond his size but every time he brings in a rat I will still blame the other animals because there is no way my sweet baby boy did that.

He will randomly attack me and I’ll claim it to be my fault even if all i did was look at him.

And I just… Garf and Zenix

[dogwhizzer]

so i wanted to make muffins for my dad for fathers day/his birthday that had just passed but the only cupcake liners we have are the ones left over from my graduation party so i. um

[id: several empty cupcake wrappers dispersed upside down on a kitchen table. the words 'Congrats grad!' are written in primary colors on the bottom, along with a little picture of a graduation cap. the 'g' and 'r' in 'grad' have been painted over in white, and the letter 'd' has been written crudely in black in it's place, making it so it spells 'dad', instead. /end id]

[slocumjoe]

Do you also call Danse things that would probably make him pick you up by the neck and throw you if he could hear you from the other end of the screen.

My go to things are princess, baby, and babygirl because he's the most sopping wet cat of a man I have ever met. This also goes for every other companion

Cait and Piper are both babe, but the tone is different. Cait is an exasperated concern babe, Piper is a "Please stop running infront of my bullets" babe

Mac is amor, baby, and babe

Nick is grandpa or Nicholas, Nicholas if he gets crushed by another elevator trying to follow me up one

Deacon is princess and sweetheart

Curie is also princess and sweetheart but I mean it

Preston is babygirl

X6 is all of the above

I think they'd all be sick of me and that's fine <3

But yeah, do you call your companions nicknames as you play?

Omg

Okayokay okay

SHIT I CALL THE COMPANIONS

Cait i call kitty-cat, red menace, batgirl (bc. She uses a bat), and Caitypie

Curie gets called Curie-ous George and Kermit

DANSE is referred to as sugarpie, babydoll, honeycakes, Dan-man, hotpants, beloved, darling, doughboy (affectionate and horny), cookie, cupcake, muffin man, cake boss, thunder thighs, big boy, and my wife/wifey. Also milkman. For Obvious Reasons

Deacon is deacman d-egg-ster (like dexter), freaky Deac, and 'that clown'

Gage is fuckface, trashman, my guy, and minimum Gage. Also sasquatch, because in game he was always just out off view doing odd shit

Hancock is han, Hamilton, johnny-B-ghoul, and snorts-mcgee

MacCready is Mac, Bobby, Ratboy, Blondie, and weasel

Nick is Nicky V, Peepaw, and Dickolas

Piper is Pipes. Pipey-Wipey, Wiper, Pippy-long-stockings, and...and Diaper. Im not kidding. I try not to. But it's so close to her name.

Preston is Pres, Gravyboat, Prez-dispenser, and Garv/Garf

X6-88 is X, catboy, Four eyes (8 looks like eyes, 2 8s is 4 eyes, plus he wears sunglasses) Sassy-ass, Edgelord, Hot Topic Shopping Piece Of Shit, and beanie baby

[nothoughtsgarf]

Edit of June 07, 1979

Classic Garf Panel, i unfortunately just chose to remove Jon again because i have run out of creativity