I'm losing my fucking mind.
In the last years, my university has been tagged multiple times with racist and neo-nazi symbols. The local of our union against racism and pro lgbtq+ was destroyed multiple times. Nothing was done, but a bit of paint to cover it up. No investigation. No punishment. And when I vocalised my discomfort, I was told it was nothing, just "immature young people trying to get attention".
Last year, the prefect of Paris authorized a Neo-Nazis' protest. Neo-Nazis walked in Paris, freely, as if it's not illegal to express racism or nazi rhetoric in this country. People weren't happy, so the prefete said it would not happen again.
Well, for the 21st of April, multiple protests against racism were organized all around France, and, they were not authorized by the authorities. The same prefect that let, a year ago, Neo-Nazis in the street of Paris, refused to let a protest against racism walk those same streets. He said "It's antisemitic. They support Palestine, they are antisemitic.". Yeah, take us for idiots, the protest against racism is going to be too antisemitic but not the Neo-Nazis you let walk around (and we know he would do it again).
And now, we have Sciences Po, one of the most reputable universities in our country, joining the movement the USAmerican students have started. The Sorbonne, another reputable university, followed. The French gov and media cried about it, called them "terrorists", "uneducated", "revolutionaries" (this one is crazy and really shows the fascism behind it all. We are in France, being revolutionary is NOT a bad thing in our culture. Wtf would you use "revolutionary" negatively in France, unless you are an oppressor?!!!) Students who are calling for the end of Genocide and just sitting on the ground! The cops were sent and dragged them out. For information, the cops CANNOT intervene in an university in France without the authorization of the president of this university. Not even the gov can make the cops enter an university, it's illegal. When students protest inside an university, people don't like seeing the cops being send after them. Two reasons: 1- students have often protest and help for the quality of life of everyone in French history, 2- WWII's trauma, Nazis stormed French universities because they were hiding Jews and resistants. Like, they are straight up acting like the Nazis, again. And the city of Paris wants to cut the budget they give to those two universities to punish them for not keeping their students in line. So, freedom of speech? GONE.
Students are protesting against a massacre, and they are calling them antisemitic. People standing against racism is antisemitic. But not the people branding Neo-Nazi symbols and chanting Neo-Nazi slogans. They don't move if you are branding a swastika, which is illegal, but will if you are branding Palestine's flag, which is not (yet). They let a political party founded with a SS go around and act nice, but the ones asking for the end of a massacre are the Nazis. Make sense.
So, I'm fucking pissed. I'm fucking pissed because I was told to "calm down" when I couldn't stand the antisemitism paint on my university, when I couldn't stand being friendly with the students that did or support that (because I did meet one). I was told to ignore antisemitism and I refused, and now, they call me antisemitic for standing with Palestinians?! How dare they when they tried to gaslight me so I would ignore the antisemitism in front of me?!
They don't care about jewish people! It's not about jewish people or the jewish faith, it's about white supremacy!
The people have already planned to protest during the Olympic Games, because the French gov is going full fascism lately (everyday, we wake up to more bs), and I hope with all my heart that we ruin the event at least (which would harm them financially), and at best, we get rid of the government and this 5th republic.
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thinking abt the previous post, the agency i worked at for a couple years would use bits of ABA and I just... I always nodded along to the boss instructing me on how to work with the kids with those tactics (I worked with the kids who were 6 and under) and then as soon as she left I tossed all that shit out of my brain and just treated the kid like a human being and worked with them where they were at.
and guess what !!! i had the most and fastest success out of every other worker in the entire building!! i was often told it seemed like i was working miracles with my kids bc they'd just progress so fast (comparatively) through the skill book we had to work on, and that the kids always seemed so happy and eager to come to the building after they started working with me!!
this is partially why I quit because I couldn't stand seeing my coworkers treat the kids like they were dogs (talking down to them, being patronizing, and utilizing shitty ABA tactics) and as much good as I was doing there, it was fucking me up bc they were extremely demanding that I work more than I was comfortable (or able) to, and often put me with "problem" kids who I didn't get to regularly see so we couldn't make much progress bc the kids weren't able to get to know me and (rightfully!) didn't trust me because they thought I'd be treating them the way everyone else did.
i just...... my coworkers would ask me how I had so much success and I would just shrug and say like, "just treat them like they're human and work with them where they're at" and I couldn't explain any more bc that'd require me admitting I wasn't following the boss' guidance for a lot of shit fjfkdl
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Idiot ex expected literally everyone around him to bend over backwards to do everything for him because he’s got ADHD and therefore isn’t capable of doing household chores or not breaking my belongings or responsibly managing his finances. He would throw up ADHD as a get out of jail free card literally every single time his behavior hurt me and I just had to accept it. Outright told me one time that trying to teach him how to do chores properly without breaking shit was triggering for him. But then was upset to see me call him an idiot and a coward in the notes on a post I reblogged about how shitty ADHD folks who use their ADHD as reason to never face consequences for their inconsiderate and selfish behavior.
Like yeah ADHD sucks and it requires a lot of difficult managing. But legit if you’re gonna say that it’s “triggering” to be expected to put away dishes without breaking them or take the used kitty litter to the dumpster outside every single day you’re just a pathetic self absorbed piece of shit. ADHD or not behavior like this has consequences and sometimes those consequences are the people you’re living with think you’re a selfish moron they don’t want to live with.
Your RSD is correct here dude, acting like this will make people drop you from their lives. You’re in your 30s and can’t do basic household chores. I had to walk on eggshells literally constantly with him because expressing even the tiniest amount of being upset with him would trigger a full blown self loathing meltdown and then he would be upset at me for hurting his feefees. He’s got ADHD, he’s got RSD, he’s got bipolar, it’s oooobviously my fault for triggering him and I need to calm him down and coddle him and reassure him that I’m not going to leave just because he hurt me repeatedly and did nothing to make up for hurting me or stop that behavior that was hurting me. He’s not capable of doing better and it makes him feel insecure that I deserve better treatment he’s not capable of giving me. I better reassure him that I’m okay with his shitty treatment of me or else he’ll fuckin kill himself. No he doesn’t want to go to couples counseling, that would be a waste of time and money.
Wow I’m such a shitty partner for not getting rid of all the glassware in my home so he won’t break it constantly. Wow I’m such a shitty partner I didn’t remind him to maintain his friendships outside of our relationship, obviously not telling him to remember to talk to and spend time with his friends is the same as somehow forbidding him from seeing them. Wow I’m such a shitty partner I don’t want to cook literal goddamn chicken rice & veg meals for his fucking dog and foot the bill for it, just like I was paying all of the other household bills as well as our entire shared food budget and cooking our meals every day because he would break shit and set fires if I didn’t. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for expecting him to actually pay the landlord his portion of the rent. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for smoking so much of his weed. Wow I’m such a shitty partner I won’t allow his awful cat in my home again after it slashed my fucking eyeball and put me in the ER. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for being constantly made sick by the filth and squalor he created faster than I could clean up without help. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for expecting to be helped with the cleaning. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for not accommodating his ADHD and letting him treat me like garbage without consequence. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for having needs and boundaries. Wow I’m such a shitty partner for not tolerating his abuse forever.
It was abuse.
He abused me.
Having ADHD does not make your behavior not abusive. ADHD does not absolve you of being an abuser. There are plenty of ADHD folks in this world that have actual honor and dignity about themselves. Don’t act like ADHD is a free excuse to abuse others. That’s not RSD talking that’s your conscience, listen to it. Treat those who care about you with genuine respect and they won’t reject you.
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