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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years

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A Place Like This 2

Warnings: this short series will include dark elements including noncon, possible violence, mentions of mental illness, and other explicit content. I’m not your mother, curate your own consumption.

This is dark!Lumberjack!Andy Barber and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start asking questions but you might not like the answers.

Note: I’m a filthy liar and this is gonna be obv more than two parts and I dunno what I’m doing.

Thank you. Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

Your office was the room across the hall from Andy’s, just beside the bathroom and furthest from your mother’s.

You had a routine; it helped you keep on track. You woke up, had a coffee and a small breakfast, and climbed back upstairs to begin your work. At noon, you took a break, you went for a walk or just sat on the porch with your mother if she wasn’t in her room. You returned to work and later in the afternoon you came down to remind your mother about her pills. Then you started dinner as the day was in its final decline.

Andy only changed that slightly. He woke earlier than you did and was on his way out as you got up. He came home around dinner time and you left a plate for him in the oven if he was late. He was quiet, he ate, and went upstairs. The first week went by as such. You almost pitied him for living in what seemed a crowded isolation.

Then the weekend came. Like the other lumber workers, he had those two days to himself. It would be the first real test of your arrangement.

You woke at your usual time and went down to make your coffee. You only wrote for a couple hours on weekends. Breaks were good. You measured the grounds into the percolator and filled it with water. You turned on the decades old stove and turned as you heard the old stairs groan.

Andy appeared in the door. He wore jeans and a thick knitted sweater. His hair, overgrown and shaggy, was pushed away from his face, his beard a shade darker and starting to puff out from its length. You suspected that as a lawyer, he never looked so unkempt and yet even now, he still managed to look refined.

“Hate to be selfish but you think there’s enough for me?” He crossed to the table and sat.

“Should be,” You rubbed your hands together. You wore an old sweatshirt with a grizzly on the front and your old faded jeans with the bleach stain on the knee. Unfashionable but warm. ‘“Cream, milk, sugar?”

“Black’s fine,” He said as he scratched his chin. “I was thinking today I could stock us up on wood for the fireplace. Since it’s snowing now, it’s better to get it done before the winter is really here.”

You squinted at him and played with the frayed cuff of your shirt. “So, you got a lot of snow in the city?”

“Not as much as here, I’m sure.” He let out a long breath and you saw the cloud in front of him.

You paused and listened for the rattle of the furnace. “Fuck.” You pushed yourself away from the counter. “I gotta light the furnace.”

“Where is it? I’ll do it.” He offered. “Since you made the coffee.”

“You sure?”

“Think I can handle it,” He stood. “City boy and all.”

“Basement door’s outside. It’s a pain but this place is old and not very well put together.” You said. “There’s a lighter in the drawer.” You pointed at the counter. “Thanks. Oh, and the key too. Hanging by the door with the green tag.”

“Alright,” He crossed to the door. “Think I’ll figure it out.”

He disappeared down the hall and returned with his big boots. He put them on before the back door and unlocked it. He tramped down the steps as the door clattered behind him and you listened to his crisp footsteps.

You wrung your hands as you thought. Nice enough, you surmised, but evasive. Maybe he wasn’t running from some heinous offense but he was trying to get away from something. You could tell by the way he always seemed to direct the conversation, especially when it turned on him.

You heard the sudden rumble of the furnace and the vents hissing. You turned as the percolator began to shake almost in tandem and the small glass knob bubbled with brown coffee. You took it off the burner as the basement door squeaked and the jingle of the key accompanied the snowy steps across the yard.

Andy kicked off his boots and slipped through the back door. He hung the key and he shook the snow from his hair and smoothed it back. He left his boots on the mat as you poured two mugs. He approached and you slid one to him. He took it with a soft thank you.

You added milk to yours and sat at the table as he did the same. You regretted it almost immediately. You should've taken it up with you and hid in your office.

"Any plans today?" He asked. You blinked and he rested his palm against the hot mug. "Sorry, it's none of my business."

"Nah, nothing planned," You replied. "So you just plan on chopping wood on your day off?"

"Not much else to do up here. It's nice. Mindless." He shrugged.

"You have a lot you don't want to think about?" You wondered.

His jaw ticked as he eyed you and his lips curled slightly.

"Don't we all?"

"You'd have to to come all the way up here from wherever you're from." You commented.

"Hmm," He chuckled under his breath. "You'd make a good prosecutor. You don't miss a lot."

"I'm a writer. I write about people, so I gotta study them closely."

"I thought you wrote about animals."

"That's what I'm paid to write about but… I have my own projects." You lifted your mug and tasted the rich brew.

He sucked his bottom lip in as his thoughts wrinkled on his forehead. "Uh huh," He uttered carefully. "Guess that's true then."

"So… is it too much to ask why you ditched being a lawyer?" You asked.

"You do anything long enough and you get bored."

"And you never did anything else? Never got married?" You prodded.

"Well, what about you?" He challenged as he hooked two finger through the handle of his mug. "Not many fish in this pond, huh."

"Touche," Your lips slanted, "You definitely are the lawyer type."

🍂

Later that day, after you gave your mother her second round of pills, you ventured out into the forest that skirt around the old property. The snow was only just past your ankles, the powder fell in spurts but didn’t seem to get much deeper. When you were met with a block or an impasse in your writing, you always came out to the trees to clear your mind. You were done for the day but you had a long week ahead of you.

You kicked the snow of a fallen tree by the river and listened to those critters not yet in hibernation in the blanket branches above. You thought about the man staying in the room next to yours and the answers he would give you; the questions you were too afraid to ask him.

He wasn’t telling you everything, perhaps he didn’t owe you everything, but the lines in his forehead, the crinkles beside his eyes, the depth of his irises as they watched you. There were things you needed to know about a person and you feared you didn’t know enough about this stranger you’d invited in. You had been too intent on the money, on your own keeping.

Or maybe you were paranoid. You were starting to sound like your mother when she claimed the birds were listening to her and taking the messages back to the monsters of the forest. When she had barricaded herself in her room and refused to come out for fear you were one of them in disguise. The day it had all fallen apart.

Your nose was numb and tingling. You pulled your scarf up over your face and turned back. The snow was crisper now. The temperatures fell with the sun and that happened quickly in the winter. The sky was a dark grey as you came back to the house, the chimney billowed up toward the quarter moon and a soft amber light shone between the curtains of the front room.

You dusted your boots off before you stepped inside. The voice didn’t stop as you took off your coat, scarf, hat, and gloves. You slid your boots off and listened. The scene was unexpected as you peeked into the front room.

Your mother sat with her favourite blanket over her legs before the fire. A fresh stack of wood sat beside it, the basket full of split logs as well. Andy bent to poke at the embers and send up sparks as he got the fire going higher.

“So, this book you’re reading,” He said as he set the poker aside. “Did she get away yet?”

“I don’t think she’s gonna,” Your mother replied as Andy stood and brushed off his jeans. “I don’t think that’s what the story’s about.”

“That’s too bad.” He looked up and his eyes met yours. You moved so that you stood in the doorway. “But I guess that’s truer to life. Not everyone gets their happy ending.”

“Well, I’ve been taking my time because it doesn’t have an ending. Yet.” She explained. “I’m waiting for her to finish.”

Your blood went cold. You crossed your arms and cleared your throat.

“What book is this, ma?” You asked.

She looked around the chair at you and blanched. Andy sat on the sofa and you pushed yourself away from the door frame. Your mother shook her head.

“I told you not to read my stuff.” You grimaced as you came closer. “It’s a first draft. Unfinished, unedited. It’s… personal.”

“From what she says, it’s pretty good regardless,” Andy offered. “Can’t blame her for her curiosity.”

You looked at him sharply and sighed as you dropped your arms.

“Whatever. Just don’t look at it again til I’m done.” You reprimanded. “Please. I’ll give you a look when I’m ready.”

“Dunno why it’s such a big deal. You write for the magazine all the time.” She grumbled.

“Because this isn’t an article on leaf fauna, ma,” You rubbed your cheek. “You already eat?”

“Just about to. Andy put a casserole in the oven.” She smiled. “Never knew a man who cooked. Your father, he couldn’t even salt his own eggs.”

“Mmm,” You sniffed as the smell of the burning wood melded with another more savoury scent. “Well, thank you, Andy. That was considerate. I’m sorry I waited so late, I was a bit distracted.”

“No problem,” He shrugged. “Really, the least I can do.”

You glanced between him and your mom. She hadn’t been this awake in ages. Her meds usually had her napping until dinnertime and asleep just as quickly after. She was vibrant and more friendly to this man than people she’d known for decades. You felt as if you’d walked in on something.

“Well, let me know. I’ll be upstairs.” You backed up. “There’s some strudel left from yesterday we can have for dessert.”

You left them and stopped at the bottom of the stairs as you looked back into the front room. Andy’s voice droned as he spoke to your mom and as she chuckled his eyes found yours. They narrowed for just a moment before he turned back and smiled at the older woman.

Nice enough, you presumed, but why didn’t you believe it?

🍂

The next day, you watched Andy through the window. The snow was thicker, a harbinger of the storm that had been brewing for over a week. He crossed to the trees, his boots barely higher than the blanket below. He sank down with each step. Only a fool would venture out as the windows billowed and flung the snow errantly.

You tore yourself away and pulled the curtain shut. You crept out into the hall and listened. Your mother slept late that day and when you gave her her pills, she’d just rolled over and fallen back to sleep.

You neared the door of Andy’s room and your hand hesitated on the knob. You took a breath and twisted it. You entered and were struck by the man’s smell; of his sweat and the deodorant that always lingered around him. The bed was made and the room barely looked lived in.

You walked slowly to the closet. Flannel shirts and jackets hung within above a single suitcase.

You felt a pang of guilt. Had you not just chided your mother for her snooping? You bent and unzipped the bag. It was empty. You checked the pockets; empty too. You stood and slid the door back into place. You went to the bed, the table next to it with the drawer that didn’t quite shut all the way and you wiggled it open.

The bible your mother left in there as if it were a hotel and pack of smokes. You’d never seen Andy smoke, never even smelled it on him. You took the carton and flipped open the top. Inside, a folded picture. You tiptoed to the window and looked out. His footprints faded into the trees.

You slid the photo out and opened it with shaky hands. It was Andy, shorter hair, trimmed beard, smiling, his arm around a dark-haired woman and a young boy in front of them. You folded it quickly and pushed it back behind the sticks in the pack. You placed it as you had found it and forced the drawer shut.

Was he running from his own family? Or maybe, what had happened to them?

You fled his room and closed the door guiltily. You were only more confused than before. You descended the stairs and hastily pulled your coat from the hook. Your hat was pulled on carelessly and you tied your boots without thinking. You pushed your hands into your gloves and angled yourself out the door. It was fucking cold; the fleece lining of your coat made little difference.

You grunted as you forced your boots through the snow and followed Andy’s tracks as they filled with a new layer of powder. You weren’t sure what you were doing, why you were doing it. What could he be doing all the way out in the woods which would be incriminating?

You went on, even as the questions floated in your mind. You followed his large boot prints, placing your feet in them as you followed his path. You came to a stop before the river, the overturned tree showed where someone had brushed aside the snow. The tracks veered off away from the log and you looked around.

You were forced back into an upright trunk, the breath knocked out of you as Andy pinned you with his arm across your chest. His eyes seared into you as he leaned his weight into you and you gasped for air as you smacked his shoulder.

“Why are you following me?” He growled.

“What? Andy, let me--” You gasped, barely able to breathe, the snow clumping in your lashes. “And--”

“Hmm? I see you watching me. I see the way you look at me.” He hissed. “I help you, help your mother and what? What do you think I am?” He grabbed your chin, his hide glove rough against your skin. “Am I that villain you write about? Is that what you think?”

“No, I…” You smacked him again and again. “I was just---” He let off just a little as you gulped for air. “There’s a storm. You shouldn’t be out here--”

“You think I can’t handle a storm?” He snarled. “You’re not a very good liar and trust me, I’ve known a lot of liars.”

“Let go of me.” You pleaded. “Jesus Christ, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I followed you, okay? I was just… curious.”

“Uh huh,” He turned you and forced his arm around your neck as he bent you over. You kicked as he dragged you through the snow towards the river. “WHat do you think? I’m hiding some big secret like one of those books you read?”

“Let--go,” Your feet slid through the blanket below. “Stop! What are you--”

“You think I’m what? A criminal? A murderer!?” He pulled you up and spun you away from him. You stumbled backwards as you faced him.

Your boots slid beneath you and you hearth the hard thunk of your sole against the the ice. Thick but not thick enough. You held out your hands as you looked down at the river coursing below the brittle surface. Your heart raced in your ears. You tried to take a step forward but he was at the bank, watching you.

“Ah ah,” He raised his hand. “You stay where you are.”

“What are you doing?” You pushed your feet apart. “Andy--”

“Terrible accident you falling through the ice like that. There’s just so much snow, you can’t really tell where the water begins.” He smiled and tucked his hands in his pocket as you heard the slow crack beneath you. “Your mother will be devastated.”

You swallowed as your eyes wetted and you looked between him and your feet. You lifted your boot and the snap below you had your heart in your throat. You plunged into the freezing water with a shrill shriek, your arms flying up to grab onto the ice.

The frozen sheet broke as you tried to latch on and you kicked as the water soaked your coat and dragged you down into the depth further. You flapped helplessly and spun in circles in the waves. The water filled your lungs and you choked and you stared up through the frigid foam, the blurry shadow staring down at you.

The cold bit deep into your flesh and your limbs weakened the more you struggled. The water smothered you and your body spasmed in the thralls of finality. Your eyes rolled back and the dark water flowed around you in welcome.

#andy barber #dark andy barber #dark!andy barber #dark andy barber x reader #dark!andy barber x reader #andy barber x reader #fic #series #a place like this #lumberjack au #au #lumberjack #Defending Jacob #dark fic #dark!fic

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anastasiabeaverhousen87 · 4 years

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Praying to the porcelain God

words: 3205

You been told before never to eat from suspicious food stands, especially if you never tried them before or if Kara or Alex haven’t already approved the food. But today you forgot your lunch at home and the food from the cafeteria was not very appealing for you. One of your co-workers saw you make faces at the food options and invited you to eat lunch with them. They were going to get burgers from a new street vendor a couple of blocks away. It was too tempting; you love cheeseburgers and they made it sound like they were really good. So, you said yes. Everyone was going and you were starving.

The following day you woke up feeling a little odd, a bit nauseous but you didn’t think anything about it. You got a chamomile tea instead of coffee and went about your day as usual. Kara was already gone so you just decided to grab a yogurt and granola bar at work.

You finished getting your things ready and were about to leave the apartment when you felt a sharp pain in your stomach followed by cramping. You went to the bathroom and removed your sweater, you felt a swelling of your abdomen and yes, you lower abdomen was inflamed and felt tender to the touch. Another painful cramp made you run to the toilet and you knew you were screwed the moment you sit down.

y/n: “Fuck!!!, ughh it hurts…damn it, Alex is going to kill me” – you didn’t leave the bathroom for a while, you lamented your poor choices while you were sitting in the toilet seat.

You decided you needed to let someone know you felt like shit and wouldn’t be able to get to work with further incidents, so you called Kara. Kara was softer and if you play your card right maybe she could be the buffer between Alex’s lecturing and you. You dialed her number and put it on speaker while washing your hands, you were standing Infront of the sink mirror and put the phone down.

Kara: “Hi sweet girl, what’s up?”

You were about to respond when you felt nausea hit hard, you saw your reflection become green and you ran to toilet once again. Just in time for you to continue emptying your stomach contents, tears sprung into your eyes as the pain in your stomach grew stronger and effort of being violently ill into the porcelain bowl.

On the other side of the line, Kara was listening to you suffering. “Y/N baby? What’s wrong, where are you?” but at not getting a response she ditched everything to fly straight home following your heartbeat.

You stopped vomiting and felt exhausted, you spit into the toilet and flush it. You use toilet paper to clean you mouth and drop to the bathroom floor exhausted. Kara enter the apartment looking for you.

Kara: “y/n?, oh my God what’s wrong baby?”- Kara panics at looking at your body sprawled in the bathroom floor all pale and clammy.

y/n: “Ughh best guess? stomach bug. I just puked my guts out, and before that I emptied my bowels in a different way” - you grimace at the explosive diarrhea you went through less than half an hour ago.

Kara: “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry you feel so poorly. Come on, let me pick you up from the floor”- the blonde woman tries to pick you up, but you feel like you’re not quite over.

Y/n: “Kara, I don’t think I can move quite yet and the floor is cold, it feels nice” –you move a little on the floor to get more of the chilly sensation on your hot skin- “I feel like crap sissy” a tear runs down your cheek and you look up to your sister. Kara brushes the tear away and cradles the side of your face. You are about to move again into a sitting position when you feel your stomach painfully cramp again and you roll into a fetal position trying to make the pain lessen somehow.

Kara: “Oh baby, looks like a horrible stomach bug. But I’m so bad at human illnesses let me call Alex really quick, she is the best when it comes to this kind of things.” Kara looks desperate and seeing you so sick on the floor. Kara is now sitting next to you holding your head in her lap and running her fingers through your hair.

Y/N: “You can’t, busy. Summit in New York” – you mumble trough clenching teeth.

Kara: “I know she is busy with work, but she can take a phone call if it’s an emergency. Its her or the ER. Your call.”

y/n: “Alex…” – you much prefer hearing your helicopter sister ask a thousand question that being prod and wait in the Emergency Room.

Kara takes her phone out of her pocket and dials the number; it rings a few times and then it connects.

Alex: “Hey what’s up, everything okay?”- the red head asks immediately, knowing her sisters wouldn’t be calling her if it was not an emergency.

Kara: “No, y/n is sick. I just found her on the bathroom floor all clammy and she told me she vomited a lot. Also, she thinks it’s a stomach bug.” You can´t hear what Alex says on the phone, then Kara turns the phone on speaker “Ok hold on, yes. Ok ok now you’re on speaker now”

Alex: “Hi little one. I’m so sorry you got sick baby and I bet you feel awful but I need to ask you a few things ok?”

You nod, even though Alex cant see you, but you think if you can let her think it’s a stomach bug going around the office you’ll be off the hook and avoid the speech on getting food from street vendors.

Y/n: “Yeah ok…”- you feel to tire so yes, you can answer whatever she wants as longs she doesn’t ask you to move.

Alex: “Ok sweetie, Kara mentioned vomiting, what else are you feeling? Do you also have diarrhea? is she warm or cold Kara?

Y/N: “painful cramps, diarrhea definitely that was first and the puked my guts out. Honestly, I don’t think there’s anything left inside my intestines by this point. It was super gross Alex. I feel a little cold now. There’s a bug going on around the office and some of the guys got sick”- you say the last part a bit fast and avoid looking at Kara, then you groan in pain at another cramp.

Kara: “She is all clammy, her cheeks are flush, and she is shivering a little. Also, she is now avoiding direct eye contact…” – Kara raises an eyebrow at you, knowing there’s something you are avoiding.

Alex: – “y/n baby, was your stool a little bloody and watery? Or soft and muddy? , also Kara can you check her abdomen does it look a little swollen and prod very gently please “

y/n: “first one”- You can hear Alex give a long sigh

Kara: “definitely swollen and a bit tender”

Alex: “What did you eat yesterday either at lunch or dinner? And don’t even think about lying to me y/n. I will know if you are lying. That’s not just a stomach bug”

Kara is looking down at you worry on her face, “We ate steak and mashed potatoes with some veggies last night. Lena cooked. and I know I can’t get sick, but Lena was okay. So, what did you eat for lunch baby?”

Y/n: “a cheeseburger” –you mumble

Alex: “Where?”

y/n: “A new place near the building, a few of the guys I work with we got burgers yesterday”

Alex: “when you say ´new place, you mean a well stablished franchise or restaurant? Not a street vendor with doubtful hygiene and suspicious meat or produce, right? - ughh busted, you thought.

y/n: “Street vendor” – you lamented

Kara: “ohh sweetie. You know better than that”- Kara kept her gentle touch but looking a bit disappointed in you.

Alex: “Well baby, I hope the burger was so amazing and worth it, because what you have is food poisoning and most likely due to contaminated ground beef with E. coli. There is nothing to stop it or make it better faster. Your body will get rid of the bacteria during the following days. Simply needs to run its course.”

Y/N: “No cheeseburger in world is worth this pain or disgusting vomiting or explosive diarrhea. I feel like crap Lexie”- you play your Lexi card, so your big sister takes pity on you. You feel bad enough as it is, you don’t need to hear more disappointment from her.

Alex: “I know baby girl. Its quite uncomfortable and painful. You need rest and avoid over exerting, that will only make your stomach feel worse. Kara, I need you to make sure she drinks lots of fluids, she will keep vomiting and having constant bowel movements in the next couple of days and she can get dehydrated very quickly. Lots of water and Pedialyte . Let her stomach to settle first . Avoid giving her any solid foods until she is no longer nauseous or vomiting as much. Avoid juices or other beverages with a lot of sugar or sweeteners that can make diarrhea worse. Let’s wait for 24 hours like this without any food and after that we can see if you can ease her back into eating soft and bland food. Call me if she gets worse or if the fever is too high.”

Y/N: “not even hungry anyways…”

Kara: “will do Alex, I’m taking off work for the week I’ll let Lena know. She is out of town as well, but I can handle goober just fine. right kiddo?”

You just try to crawl into Kara’s lap you starting to feel cold and so very tired. “Yeah, I’m cold. You warm”

Alex: “She will sleep a lot, wake her up and make her drink water or fluids Kara, its very important. Make sure her temperature doesn’t go above 102 F. if she get above that range just make her take a bath in lukewarm water or use a cold compress. Let her eat ice chips, NO dairy, no caffeine, no sugar, or fatty food. If she does eat those, she will end up throwing up everything. If temperature goes above 103 take her immediately to the ER. It shouldn’t but keep an eye on that. Seriously Kara call me anytime ok?”

Kara: “Will do Alex. Thanks, and I’ll call you later once y/n is more comfortable and asleep”

Alex: “Ok, feel better sweetie, I’ll be back as soon as I can. Be good for Kara and try to relax and let your body get rid of everything at its own pace. Don’t rush anything. I love you sweetheart. Love you Kara, bye”

Y/N “Bye, love you Lexie”

Kara: “Bye Alex, love you too” – the phone calls gets disconnected. Kara looks down at you. “You think you are ready to move from the bathroom floor to the living room?”

y/n: “can you help me up to rinse my mouth? It tastes like crap ugh”

Kara: “of course. Up we go”- Kara gently stands up with you in her arms and helps you to your feet.

But you get dizzy and grab ahold of Kara’s arms for support

Kara: “hey hey I got you, easy there baby girl”

y/n: “everything its spinning and I don’t feel so g…” but before you can finish the sentence your eyes go wide and Kara see what’s about to happen and helps you to your knees in front of the toilet once again. Kara holds your hair away from your face with her other hand rubbing soothing circles down your spine while providing word of comfort.

You keep vomiting for a few minutes more “ughh I thought I had ridden of everything by now. This Is so disgusting” a few tears leak down your cheeks and Kara just helps you to your feet again and flushes the toilet.

Kara: “I know sweet girl, but Alex did say you will be experiencing vomiting and other stuff for a few days. So, let’s get you rinse your mouth and settle down in the couch so you can sleep this off, okay?”

You just nod and work on getting your teeth brushed and get rid of the nasty taste. Kara helps you to your room to change into your pajamas.

Kara: “Bed or couch?” -you just point down to your bed giving her your answer. “Okay okay” Kara lowers you on your bed and goes to close the curtains so you can rest more comfortably.

y/n: “Hold me?”- you pout pitifully

Kara: “of course baby girl. Let me just get your water and text Lena to let her know I won’t be into work for a few days and also text your boss you’re sick” – I’ll be right back.

y/n:” don’t want water please just hold me, I’m cold sissy”- more tears run down your cheeks, you just want your sister to hold you now.

Kara: “aww chucks, baby you feel real awful don’t ya? Ok here I’ll call later, and you need to drink water in an hour or two. I will wake you up. come here sweet bean”- Kara moves you so you are now lying basically on top of her, you hide your face into her neck and wrap your arms around her. You are leaching on her warmth shamelessly. Kara doesn’t mind at all begins to pat down your back softly like when you were little she needed to calm you down and put to to sleep.

Kara: “Aww my little koala is here. You’re so cuddly baby. I’m sorry you are feeling so poorly but I’ll be here with you all the time. You just close your eyes and go to sleep. You’ll feel better in no time, you’ll see”

y/n: “I’m never eating cheeseburgers again”- you give a yawn and began to drift off. Kara juts chuckles and starts to hum softly a lullaby song she uses since you were a little girl and where having trouble falling asleep or felt sick. You are out in less than 5 minutes.

Kara wait for you to be completely asleep to grab her cellphone she still has on her pocket. Texts Lena you are sick and will call her later, but you are okay just miserable for eating street food. And then sends a quick text to y/n boss, thank Rao she is close friends with y/n otherwise would be a pain to explain why she is texting instead of her employee.

Kara puts the cellphone down on the nightstand and holds y/n more to her chest and begins to run her hand up and down y/n spine and watches her sleep for a little while until herself starts to feel sleepy and decides to take a nap too.

Kara is awaken by your moving around and painful moaning. You curl into yourself as much as you can, trying to wave through the painful cramp in your tummy.

y/n: “It really hurts Kara, it hurts so bad”- you say through clenching teeth and tears sprung into your eyes once again. You feel miserable and in so much pain.

Kara feels you are getting a bit hotter now and you are sweating too. “Okay little one, I think a bath can help you now, and you need to drink a little bit of water. Come here”

y/n: “No. pelease, no Kara. I just want the pain to stop and sleep again. I don’t want a bath” -you cry softly into her neck

Kara: “I’m sorry baby, but you feel too warm and you will feel better after the bath. I’ll stay with you the whole time.”

Kara picks you up from the bed and takes into the bathroom, she sits you down at the toilet seat while she runs a lukewarm bath for you.

Y/n: “Kara I don’t feel so good…” again you turn green and Kara helps you to sit infront the porcelain bowl once more.

You throw up again, but its mostly bile. Kara holds your hair out of your face while making comforting rubs on your lower back while you continue to be sick. your stomach its already empty from all the previous vomiting and you didn’t really eat anything for breakfast. You feel so weak after the effort it took to vomit once again. You are sweaty and pale and slump into Kara. Kara gently runs a hand down your spine and grabs a small towel to clean off the bile in your lips.

Kara: “sshh …baby come one. Its over now. Here use this mouth wash to rinse and spit it in the toilet” -Kara then flushes the toilet and strips you off your clothes. She also strips down to her underwear and gets into the tub with you. She helps you lean into her so she can wash your skin with a soft washcloth and pour the lukewarm water down your body to cool you down. After a while she notices your feel cooler to the touch. Washes your hair gently and lets you lean back onto her. You have always loved the skin to skin contact when feeling sick or unwell. Your sisters have done this many times over the years as well as you mom Eliza. You like feeling their warm skin and listen to their heartbeat. But Kara posses a special feature, she is warmer than any human. You feel her skin on you help you with the chills and you feel yourself drifting off to sleep again.

Kara notices you are almost asleep, and decides you are cool enough now and gently nudges you awake.

Kara: “sweet girl please don’t fall asleep quite yet. Let me dry you off a bit and you need to drink a little bit of water. Then you can sleep again promise”

You grunt in disapproval “Nuh uh … don’t wanna, I just want sleep”

Kara: “ I know sweetie but its not an option, come one”- Kara immediately stands and grabs ahold of you and takes one of the bath robes and uses one on her and then she uses a big fluffy towel to pat you down enough to remove the water excess but leaving your skin a bit damp to help keeping you cool.

She takes you back to your room and sets you on top of the bed and quickly grabs a set of lose shorts and tank top to avoid overheating you. She then sits you with you back on a pillow resting against the headboard while she speeds to the kitchen to get you ice water.

Kara: “Okay sweetie small sips, just a few smalls sips and that’s it.”- she makes you drink a bit of water and leaves the glass on the nightstand again. You notice she is now wearing a pajamas too and in the nightstand there’s also a bowl with water and a few small towels and an empty plastic bow- “Just in case you feel sick and need to vomit again and avoid a trip to the bathroom”

Y/N:” thank you sissy”- you tear up and your chin trembles.

Kara: “No no don’t cry baby girl. Come here”- she gently lifts you up sits down and then lays you on her side you head resting on her collarbone. She left her soft button- up pajama top mostly open so you can lean into her and feel her skin near the collarbone and upper chest. You settle down and keep listening to her heartbeat.

Kara: “sshh sshh…sweetie just close your eyes and sleep. You’ll feel better soon just sleep now” – once again you feel her gentle touch on your back, down your arms and temple. And that soft voice humming the melody you associate with comfort. you move a little trying to find the perfect spot and just like that in less than 10 minutes you’re asleep.

#supergirl #alex x baby danvers #baby danvers #baby!danvers #alex danvers #baby danvers x kara #baby danvers imagine #b!d #sickfic #i feel sick #vomit warning #food poisoning #caretaker #skin to skin

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vampire03 · 3 years

Text

Diabolik Christmas

Everyone x reader Christmas special

"Hnnn...mmm..." Y/N woke up feeling something heavy on top of her. She opened her eyes and tried to move. She saw blond locks in front of her. Shu.

"G'morning, troublesome creature." He mumbled sleepily.

"Good morning, Shu." Y/N smiles.

Shu rolled to her side and without opening his eyes says "There is a gift here in your room. Find it yourself, it's too bothersome to show you where it is...". Then he fell asleep again.

Y/N sighed and chuckled at his usual behavior. She looked around her room and under her bed she found a tiny yellow giftbox with a neat blue ribbon on top. Y/N opened it and inside there was a silver collar with musical notes engraved on it in beautiful shapes.

(Something like this, I couldn't find a better image, Im sowwyyy TwT)

"Thank you, Shu!" Y/N said as she coverd him with an electric blanket. That was his Christmas present from her. He smiled and snuggled even more in it without opening his eyes.

Then she exited the room and started walking to the kitchen. There surely will be some leftovers on the table, right?

On the way two arms snaked around her body from behind and a familiar flirty voice was heard.

"Bitch-chaaaaaan~ Merry Christmas!"

"Laito!" Y/N chuckled and leaned into his embrace.

"Look what I got you!" He happily squealed as he spayed something on her neck.

"Kyaaaah!" She welped in surprise. Then se smelled... perfume? A really nice perfume with vanilla and something else, that made the aroma sweet and sexy at the same time.

"Nfu. Use it wisely!" He chuckled and pecked her cheek, dissapearing as fast as he appeared. She will give him the fancy watch she got him later, it seemed.

Y/N blushed and smiled, putting the perfume in her pocked as she finally reached the kitchen. There a pile of deleicious food awaited her, a certain black-haired vampire with glasses was turning the leftovers from Christmas Eve into masterpieces.

"Good morning, Reiji, and Merry Christmas!" Y/N happily greated.

"Aaah, good morning, Y/N! And Merry Christmas. He smiled as he gestured towards to table, inviting her to sit.

She sat down and in front of her were served delicious dishes - steak with vegetables, fruits with whipped cream, baked apples and candies. Her eyes filled with joy.

"Ah! I almost forgot!" Y/N handed Reiji a blue giftbox with silver-red ribbon. His facial expression became somewhat happy and excited in a really childish way. Inside the box was a... blue baggy sweather?

"You are always dressed up in a formal manner... Why don't you wear more comfy clothes once in a while?" Y/N happily said as she looked at him. He had already put on the sweater and looked so cute. They both smiled.

"But where are my manners?" He asked himself as he gave her a tiny black box. She opened it and inside was a silver ring with a big sapphire on top.

"It's so beautiful!" She said as she put it on.

"I'm glad." Reiji smiled and handed her a cup of tea. Y/N thanked him and took a sip. When she looked around again, Reiji was nowhere to be seen.

"Hm? They dissapear and appear so fast!"

She looked around the kitchen for more leftovers to eat and saw a bunny plushie and a note attached to it. "This is Lilly. Me and Teddy decided she will enjoy being your friend." Was written by a certain purple haired vampire. Awww. She has prepared new clothes for Teddy and a fancy, somehow lolita coat for Kanato. She will have to give them to him later.

She then turned towards the exit to walk away and saw a note on the table.

"Oi, Chichinashi. Me and this Kino guy decided to have fun with you. We won't give you you presents so easily - you gotta find them!"

Yup. That's in Ayato's style. And the handwritting was so messy. There was no mistake. Y/N took the note and searched around for something left from Ayato and/or Kino. Almost half an hour later, she decided to search in the pool area. And she found another note on a bench.

"Did you think that we will give you the present so easily, Princess?" You will have to earn it! And swim all the way to the bottom of the pool to get it, hahaha!"

That handwritting was also messy, but still neater than Ayato's. Kino. Of course when these two pranksters somehow find a way to work together, it will be something like this. Good thing that she knew how to swim. She dived in and found a tiny black box on the bottom of the pool. She took it and got out of the water.

She opened it with excitement, only to find another note.

"Hahahaha, you fell for it!" Was written in Ayato's handwritting. "That was just a warm-up, the real present is on the bottom of the lake!" Was written in Kino's handwriting. These two jerks! Urgh!!!

Anyway, Y/N stretched up nicely and prepared herself. She went to the lake and dived into the cold water.

After a few unsuccessful tries she finaly found two red boxes with black ribbons and took them.

Once on land she opened the forst box.

"Ha! I knew you will open Ore-sama's present first! Now you can enjoy my scent whenever you go!" Was written on a card.

In the box there was one of Ayato's old shirts he used for basketball tranings. It was neatly washed, and folded. Heh, guess someone had aked Reiji for help. Was that present a sign of his ownership over her? Knowing Ayato, probably it was. And there were these nice sporty shoes too. They were really comfy and nice! She will play basketball with him after that. She smiled.

Then she opened Kino's present - inside there was a brand new iPhone.

"Now you can download that multiplayer game I told you about and we can play it together, right, princess?" Was written on a tiny card. That looked expensive. But more importantly, it was so sweet too! She will now spend more time with him as well.

Y/N decided she will give them their presents later at dinner - for Ayato a pair of jeans with one of its legs originaly shorter. Just in Ayato's style. And for Kino - a waterproof mini camera. He would love making unique photoshoots with it! She smiled yet again and went to take a shower, so she won't catch a cold after that.

After the shower she went to her room. She found a silver beautiful bracelet with the infinity sign and a tiny note, written in a messy manner.

"Merry Christmas! I wish you health and luck and whatever you mortals wish each other." Aaah, Subaru. Always Tsundere. She had already left his gift in his room. It was only a matter of time for him to find it. A very fluffy white pillow for him to hug in his sleep. She knew he secretly needed to hug something in his sleep.

She looked around her room again. And her gaze landed on her desk. There she found a weird heart? It was made of wires?

"Dear Eve. This is a part of the gift from the Mukami brothers to you. The other parts are in the music room, the garden and the torture chamber. Please seek Yuma for help if you have troubles assembling it. We want you to enjoy finding your gift and constructing it." Was written on a note with neat letters by Ruki, apparently.

Y/N searched all the places she was told and thankfully the Mukamis didn't prank her like Ayato and Kino did. She found 3 other hearts like this, a frame and some more wires.

Somehow she assembled it all on her own and got this:

(Imaginge that instead of "Be mine" is written "Be ours")

It was a night lamp! A very creative one! Now her nights won't be completely dark. She put it on the nightstand and enjoyed its light some more before turning it off again and going to each of the Mukami's rooms to leave them her presents - a professional kitchen knife set for Ruki, fancy jewelry for Kou, this giant encyclopedia about gardening Yuma wanted so much and an ukulele for Azusa.

And as she walked away from Azusa's room, she was suddenly hopped on the back of a certain wolf. "Nii-san is waiting for us!" Shin huffed as he ran really fast through the hallway.

He reached Carla's room where the white-haired man was waiting for them. He handed her a big fancy box.

Inside there was on of those two-pieces paintings.

"This is from our mansion's art collection. Feel honoured and Merry Christmas" Carla explained.

She thanked them multiple times. There was an wide ugly empty space on the wall in her room. Now it will finally be pretty!

"Carla, Shin... Did you find your Christmas presents?"

"Yes!" They cheerfuly said in unison and took out large doggy sweathers, put them on and changed into their wolf forms. They looked so fancy snd royal like that!

They woofed happily and Y/N went to the kitchen, smiling, remembering she has to help Reiji with dinner now. When she passes through the living room, a sleepy Shu pulled her into his embrace. She giggled and hugged back, as she felt Reiji take her hand and kissing it. Then the triplets came - rubbing their noses with hers, kissing her face. Kino appeared from behind and started playing with her hair. The Mukami brothers also joined in the kissing and hugging, as two way too familiar wolves came and snuggled with her. Subaru came out of nowhere as well.

Before she knew it, she was squished between 13 demons, who showered her with kisses and love, feeling like one big, big family.

Merry Christmas and Happy New year!

Sorry that there are no pictures for some of the presents. Tumblr has limit of 10 photos per post...

#diabolik lovers #dl #tsukinami #kino sakamaki #mukami #scenario #sakamaki #x-mas #special #christmas #christmas special

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snezfics-n-shit · 4 years

Text

Home For The Holidays - An AA fic that’s way too long

I’ve been thinkin bout that post that’s like “character with the kink is sneezing a lot and their partner who usually indulges them is having fun with How The Turns Have Tabled” so now I give you a Wrightworth + snzfcker Phoenix fic based on that exact premise. In which Phoenix re-introduces Miles to Mama Wright, Christmas is celebrated for 2 months straight, and disaster man Phoenix is back on his bullshit.

Tbh if I kept this lying around I’d just keep editing and it’d never get done oof but please enjoy

Phoenix’s mother had clearly purchased a new doorbell. The tune echoed from behind the door at the press of the button; this year, it was much louder and played Jingle Bells a month too early. Speaking of a month too early, other than a rather articulate variant of a ‘no soliciting’ sticker, the decorations on the door were Christmas themed as well, completely skipping Thanksgiving and likely put up the day after Halloween. That was just how Mrs. Wright was: a major Christmas enthusiast through and through.

Just as expected, she greeted her son and his family while sporting a comfy Christmas-themed sweater. Cats in Santa hats, a design that had Trucy in awe at how cute they were. Christmas and cats, two of Mrs. Wright’s joys in life. Mrs. Wright had little contact with family members other than Phoenix and Trucy, so she resolved a lot of the resulting loneliness by adopting cats. The cats she adopted were a lot like her, having few blood relatives around and finding a home in a found family.

“Phoenix! You’re early!” Mrs. Wright looked up and down at her son, assessing just how many extra pies she would need to make; he was skin and bones since he had been disbarred! “You didn’t have to shave before you came, dear. The holiday is this Thursday, so you have time to make yourself look nice.”

“You tell me that every time I visit, mom.” Phoenix chuckled. “Today, I have a good reason to look nice. There’s someone I’d like for you to meet.”

“Well, I know I’ve met your adorable daughter before.” Mrs. Wright leaned down to give Trucy a big hug. “You have no idea how happy I am to have a grandbaby to spoil!”

“You tell me that every time, too.” Phoenix stepped to the side, showing off Miles, who had done a spectacular job at hiding behind him before the big reveal. “This is my boyfriend, Miles Edgeworth. I’ve been meaning to tell you since we started dating, but only now does he have a day off where you can finally meet in person.”

“Wait, Miles?” Mrs. Wright blinked a few times. Miles was certainly as well dressed as the boy she remembered Phoenix bringing home so many times, but was he the same person? “That sweet boy who would always help me with the dishes when he stayed over? This is him?”

“I believe so, Mrs. Wright.” Miles hardly remembered his youth well enough to give a definite answer, but that sounded like something he would have done. It sounded like something he would do even now, actually.

“Sounds like you found yourself a keeper, dear.” Mrs. Wright held the door open wider to let the trio in. “It’s awfully chilly today. Come inside before you catch a cold.”

The walls were lined with framed pictures of Phoenix, with unsurprisingly many of which being of him celebrating Christmas. The trend continued even with pictures of Trucy that Phoenix had sent to his mother. While there weren’t nearly as many, there were a few notable photos of Phoenix’s parents: the pictures taken when they renewed their wedding vows and when Mrs. Wright got her associate’s degree after Phoenix started working with Mia, for example.

“Ah, now I remember.” Miles looked a little uncomfortable with the holiday-centric décor. “Your mother’s Christmas obsession.”

“Be nice.” Phoenix whispered. “It’s something she really likes; it’s not hurting anyone.”

“I love Grandma’s reindeer!” Trucy lifted herself with her tiptoes, eager to see the skillfully crafted wooden reindeer lining the shelf above the shoe rack. “Rudolph’s my favorite! Because he made everyone real sorry for making fun of him!”

“He did, didn’t he?” Phoenix slipped off his shoes and hung up his and Miles’s coats on the coat rack. “I like him, too. He had a talent that really turned Christmas eve around.” That sounded much like how he used to be in the courtroom. He missed that courtroom a lot.

“I’m gonna go find Buster!” Trucy ran off. Buster was one of Mrs. Wright’s cats; his big personality quickly made him Trucy’s favorite. Phoenix, however, was more fond of Doily (formerly Dollie), a friendly and relaxed cat who was happy as long as she had somewhere to sit. There were three more: a senior cat named Gerald, a gray tabby named Della, and a new kitten named Harvey. While it seemed like a lot of cats, the home Phoenix’s parents resided in after Phoenix left for Ivy University was specifically picked to be spacious enough for even the most rambunctious cats.

“I believe you told me you wanted to introduce me to your parents’ cats, correct?” Miles followed Phoenix to one of the living room couches. “And you’re sure they’re not aggressive or anything?” While Miles knew dogs had a history of being working and companion animals, he couldn’t exactly say he had read any solid proof of cats earning a similarly high status. Even the nicest cats he had met always seemed more interested in leaving as many scars on his hand as possible than being friendly with him.

“I can vouch for all but Harvey, since he’s new, but my mom has always been something like a cat whisperer.” Phoenix yanked a tissue from the end table next to the couch’s arm rest. “I’m sure they’ll like you a lot.” He smiled before blowing his nose softly. “My nose must be thawing out.” He chuckled.

“I told you to bring your scarf when I called you.” Mrs. Wright called out from the kitchen. “Now you’re catching a cold, aren’t you?”

“No, I feel fine.” Phoenix rubbed the bottom of his nose with the tissue folded in half. “Just part of warming up.”

“I’m surprised you’d forget your scarf for someone who claims going out with a wet head spells ‘pneumonia.’” Miles hummed.

“Hey, you know it’s not scarf weather.” Phoenix chuckled and tossed the tissue into the trash bin, impressed that he made the shot. Miles found it amusing that Phoenix completely ignored the wet head comment, likely because he really did tell Miles and Trucy that all the time. “It is the perfect weather for mom’s homemade stew, though.”

“I’m eager to try it, considering you’ve been talking it up since she called to invite us over.”

“It’s really good!” Phoenix repeated the claim he had been making for weeks. “I can’t wait for you to try it.” He pressed his knuckle against his nose. “Hopefully it’ll be dinner soon.”

“That won’t be for a while, I’m afraid.” Mrs. Wright carried some glasses of water to the living room. “Your father is working late tonight.”

“What does he do?” Miles leaned forward.

“He works in construction. He’s very proud of his work.” Mrs. Wright smiled as she placed the glasses of water on the coasters sitting in front of Miles and Phoenix. “Before Phoenix was born, where he worked didn’t earn him nearly enough to support us. He’s been much happier ever since he’s found somewhere that lets us live comfortably.”

“Where did he work before, if you-” Miles was cut off by the sound of Phoenix blowing his nose again. “If you don’t mind me asking, of course.”

“He worked with his father and other members of the community he grew up in.” Mrs. Wright explained. “It was actually looked down upon to earn the income we needed, or to even have a dream job. That’s why we’ve been so supportive of Phoenix pursuing his dreams; if he wanted to change his major a second time, we would have gladly let him.”

Miles couldn’t imagine being actively discouraged from achieving success. He assumed that pressure was always the other way around. He wasn’t able to lose himself in his curiosity, though. Phoenix’s deep sniffing made sure of that.

“Phoenix?” Mrs. Wright cocked her head. “Are you sure you’re feeling alright?”

“Yeah, really.” Phoenix waved his hand as if to dismiss any concerns. “I’m sure this’ll stop before dinner.” His breath hitched for a second, but nothing came of it other than an exhale through his mouth.

“If you say so.” Mrs. Wright stood up and left for the kitchen. “I’m going to work on the desserts, so you two just relax and drink your water. I think you need eight glasses a day.”

“Daddy! I found Buster!” Trucy cradled the fluffy orange cat like a baby, Buster’s favorite way to be held. “He let me hold him this whole time! He’s so nice!” Phoenix gave Miles a reassuring smile, pointing to Buster as proof the Wright cats were much friendlier than past cats Miles had met.

“Hey there, Buster.” Phoenix beckoned Buster to sit on his lap. “Wow, he’s really liking me today.” He blinked a few times. “Normally he just walks away when I ask for him to sit next to me.”

“Maybe he can smell that you’ve been spoiling Pess,” Miles joked, “and he wants you to spoil him as well.”

“Cats are pretty smart. Ah!” Phoenix reached for another tissue, squeezing his eyes shut as he blew more heavily than the last time. “Guess I wasn’t done.” He laughed, dabbing the corners of his eyes. “But yeah, I think you’re right.”

“I hope he’ll like me as much as he likes you.” Miles reached to pet Buster and was shocked to hear the loud purrs the cat made. Buster was so soft, Miles thought he could pet him forever; there weren’t even any claws out. “He’s actually letting me pet him.”

“I told you so.” Phoenix sniffed. “Buster is really friendly. My parents have had him for almost as long as we had Doily. She’s my favorite. I’d show her to you but she’s probably asleep right now.” He pressed the back of his wrist against his right eye, putting on some pressure as he rubbed absentmindedly. Dropping his hand revealed the area around his eyelid to be a tad pink.

“Are you tired from the trip, love?” Miles removed his hand from petting Buster to caress Phoenix’s cheek. “Maybe you should lie down for a while.”

“Yeah, I usually do that when I visit mom alone, actually.” Phoenix gently picked Buster up to gently place on Miles’s lap, laughing softly as he watched Miles light up in fascination with Buster’s sociability. He disposed of his tissue before poking his head into the kitchen doorway to find his mother and Trucy taste-testing desserts. “Uh, hey, mom?”

“Yes?” Mrs. Wright looked up from the tray of finger food desserts. Quite a few were already gone, but knowing her, there would be more by the time she brought out her famous pumpkin pie.

“I’m going to lie down for a while. I should be up for dinner, though.” Phoenix directed his attention to his daughter, whose whipped cream decorated cheeks were proof she had her share of the desserts. “And Trucy?”

“Yes, Daddy?”

“Try not to eat too many sweets or you’ll spoil your appetite.”

“Okay.” Trucy nodded and proceeded to put another small dessert in her mouth.

“Go ahead and get some rest, dear.” Mrs. Wright sighed at the sight of Phoenix’s face. “You do look pretty tired. Your bedroom should be ready, but you might need to convince Doily to let you have some room on your bed.”

“Doily’s always been my sleeping buddy here, so I don’t mind.” Phoenix assured. He made his journey upstairs, sniffling once or twice and noting he needed to blow his nose again. The sight of only two twin sized beds in the guest room was disappointing, but considering Miles was a surprise additional guest, it was more Phoenix’s fault for not allowing his mother more time to make the appropriate accommodations. Maybe he and Miles could alternate between the bed and the living room couch while Trucy kept her bunny themed bed throughout the week of their stay.

As predicted, Doily was sleeping on Phoenix’s pillow and needed just a gentle nudge to let him have somewhere to put his head; not enough to chase her off the bed completely, just enough to make some room.

“Hey, Doily. Did you miss me?” His vision grew slightly blurry and his eyes felt wet. Phoenix didn’t remember yawning, but he must have been really tired. “I could use a nap, too, so I’d like you to… hh… to-- Hh’TTCCHHHhh!” He kept his tongue at the roof of his mouth as if that would quiet the sound. Despite his efforts, he scared Doily off the bed completely. “Ngh… Sorry.” He sniffled with his hand pressed under his nose. Maybe he was coming down with a cold after all.

He slid himself under the blanket, admittedly afraid of how he would be feeling whenever he would wake up. If he was getting sick, maybe it wasn’t completely bad, considering he was staying with his mother. His mom was good at that sort of thing, even long after he moved out on his own.

When the back of his head hit the pillow a deep, aggressive itch attacked the back of his eyes and sinuses. How was he supposed to sleep like this? No matter how hard he pressed, alternating between rubbing his eyes and nose, it only seemed to get worse. Was that his pulse? Behind his eyes?

“A’aschhHUUH! Aa’SSCHHHOOUuh! T’TTCHHuuh!!” He sat up, only just having a moment to get some air before he started again. “T’SHCHUUH!! TT’CHHHOOUH!!”

“Sweetheart, sorry to disturb you, but--” Miles stopped in his tracks at the sight of the state Phoenix was in. “Are you… feeling alright?”

“This has to be the weirdest cold I’ve ever had.” Phoenix squinted as he sniffled thickly. “I just wedt to lie dowd ahd-- Hh’TTTCHHOOH! I cad’t stop sdeezi’g.”

“I see.” Miles kept his mouth shut regarding how this was the exact sort of thing he’d tell Phoenix to make him flustered. He did, however, thought it would be amusing to see Phoenix’s face when offered a handkerchief. “Here, you could use this.” Phoenix didn’t look flustered at all, simply desperate as he took the handkerchief and sneezed thrice into it. What a shame. “You were fine when we left home.”

“That’s what’s so weird about it!” Phoenix aggressively rubbed at his face. “Dot to bedtiod everythi’g itches.”

“That doesn’t sound like a cold, love.” Miles wiped some of the tears from Phoenix’s face with his thumb.

“I feel pretty sick.” Phoenix muttered before blowing his nose again, unsure why he was even bothering at this point.

“I imagine you do.” Miles kissed Phoenix’s very wet cheek. “Poor thing. Do you have any ideas on what’s making you feel so bad?”

“Nope.” Phoenix shook his head. “I kinda just started a little bit when we got here and-- Aa’SSHHOOUH! T’TSSCHHOOUHh!! *snf* I can’t stop since I came upstairs.”

“Maybe you’ve developed an allergy to cats?”

“Don’t even joke about that!” Phoenix scolded, taking offense. “They’re my family!”

“I’m not joking. It’s a genuine possibility.” Miles made a small gasp and looked at his hand. “I touched your face after petting one of them, too. I’m so sorry.”

"Don't be sorry because I'm not allergic to cats." Phoenix huffed. He pushed the blanket off his lap and stood up, not wanting to discuss the topic further. “I’m going back downstairs.”

“Alright.” There was no point in arguing. If Phoenix was going to be so stubborn about this, then Miles just needed to make the best of the situation.

Miles followed Phoenix down the stairs, briefly interrupted when Phoenix needed to stop halfway so he could sneeze again.

“Bless you, sweetheart.” He thought saying that might push the envelope a little.

“Are you baki’g fud of be?” Phoenix glared at him through red, damp eyes.

“I wouldn’t dare.” Miles answered sincerely. “You just sound so awful.” Okay, maybe he was having a little fun, nudging Phoenix to hopefully see the amusing irony of his circumstances.

Phoenix grumbled something as he dragged himself to the kitchen, clearly still annoyed with Miles for what he had said earlier.

“I thought you were napping, Daddy.” Trucy looked up from a tall glass of chocolate milk. “Did you have a bad dream?”

“He couldn’t get any sleep, from what I can tell.” Miles leaned against Phoenix’s shoulder.

“I’m pretty sure I’m getting sick.” Phoenix scratched the back of his head.

“Oh, I knew you’d catch a cold standing out there without a scarf.” Mrs. Wright gently pushed Phoenix on the way to the living room. “Rest on the couch and I’ll get you some blankets.”

“I told you, it’s just a cold, really.” Phoenix made eye contact with Miles the whole time as he blew his nose with a fresh tissue.

“Perhaps you’re right.” Miles lied and kissed the top of his boyfriend’s head. “I certainly hope you’ll feel well enough to join us for dinner on Thursday.”

“Of course I will.” Phoenix insisted just before Mrs. Wright draped a large blanket over him. While Phoenix thought nothing of it and the intense itch that followed, Miles needed to hold his tongue as he watched short hairs floating around in Phoenix’s general direction. “T-Thanks.” He stuttered as he fanned his face with his hands, truly a sight Miles wished he could comment on with honesty. “Aa’IIISHHHUUH! T’TCHHUUh!! Ugh. Ow.”

“Your poor nose.” Miles cooed. “It must be so tiring, sneezing like that.”

“It is.” Phoenix furiously rubbed at his eyes. “Agh, my eyes, too.”

“They’re really bothering you, aren’t they?” Miles played up his sincere concern. “Driving you crazy, I bet.” He dropped a hint, hoping that extra pink in Phoenix’s face wasn’t just more released histamine. In the corner of his eye was Doily, who was staring intently at Phoenix. “Hey, little one.” Miles leaned over to pet the cat. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to stay here like that.” He whispered, not wanting to further offend Phoenix.

Doily, being hardly fluent in human suggestion, hopped onto Phoenix’s lap anyway.

“Doily, did you come to check up on me?” Phoenix could hardly keep his smile in place before he started sneezing again. “Gh… Sorry, Doily.” He scratched behind Doily’s ears; the sound of his sniffling accompanied her purring.

“Um, sweetheart?”

“I know what you’re about to say, and I still say no.” Phoenix pet Doily with both hands, almost out of spite.

“No, that’s not exactly--”

“Daddy! You found Doily!” Trucy stared at Phoenix and the purring cat for a while. “What’s wrong with your arms, Daddy?” Miles took hold of Phoenix’s right arm.

“Hey! You’ll scare her away again!” Phoenix protested, not even paying attention to what Miles was doing. Just as he warned, Doily was startled by the sudden movement and ran off somewhere else in the house.

“Hives.” Miles observed bluntly. “Trucy, dear, could you ask your grandmother to find some benadryl?” Phoenix raised no objections to that, which Miles hardly minded at all.

“Okay, Papa Miles!” Trucy ran off to find Mrs. Wright, leaving Phoenix and Miles alone to hopefully reach an agreement.

“Well, what happens now?” Phoenix looked down. “Do I just never visit my parents again?” Was that his way of saying Miles was right?

“Of course not, love.” Miles massaged the blotchy areas of Phoenix’s arm. “You’ll just need to be more careful, which you’ve been failing to do a lot lately. Feels like everyday I need to pull you out of trouble.”

“I can’t eat mom’s cooking if I’m asleep, though.” Phoenix let his head hit the soft back of the couch.

“Then we’ll pick up something non-drowsy while you’re resting this evening.” Miles made it sound so easy. In fact, everything he had been saying recently sounded just so… so… Oh.

“You’ve been talking like this on purpose.” Phoenix accused, punctuated by a thick sniffle. There was that flush Miles was looking for. “Is that what I sound like?” He hid his face behind his hands.

“I took some creative license.” Miles smirked before kissing Phoenix’s cheek. “I was starting to get worried when you said you ‘couldn’t stop sneezing’ with a straight face.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“And miss out on all this fun? I think not.”

“So is this all-- T’TCHHHOOH!” Phoenix pressed his hand under his nose, giving his voice even more of a nasal quality. “It’s all just payback, huh?”

“Not quite.” Miles held Phoenix’s free hand with both his hands. “You always make me feel so attractive even when I’m looking like you do right now.”

“That’s because you can pull it off.” Phoenix finally managed to chuckle.

“And so can you.” Miles didn’t let Phoenix protest that, shushing him with an index finger pressed to his lips. “I may not know one hundred percent how you see me, but I’d like you to feel every bit as special.”

“Miles!” Aha! Now Phoenix was very red in the face. Mission successful, if Miles said so himself. “Maybe when I don’t hear my mom’s footsteps coming down the stairs.”

#sneezing #snez #snz #sneeze kink #snez attorney #my fics #my writing #this took 5 million years but here you guys go

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joonclouds · 4 years

Text

A space situation

You sigh heavily and shut your eyes. The man was so intelligent, but days like this you wonder if sometimes his brain took unpaid leave.

“My house is literally a third the size of your closet.”

If this wasn’t your house you might have found it a little bit funny. But it is your house.

Joon is your very rich very endearing sugar daddy but also very clumsy and sometimes rash in buying you whatever what he sees fit but it’s not very practical all the time.

Namjoon x Reader

Genre: It’s a fluff party guys

Word Count: 3k

Note: Quarantine can be inspiring lol

You don’t know you’re smiling, but it’s there. A tiny little smile lingering on your face as you watch the man in your kitchen from your crummy two-seater couch that barely fits into your living room.

It’s not a sight you’ll ever get used to seeing, you think, Namjoon with his designer suits and perfectly swept back hair, fumbling around in the drawers. He was wearing that new Dior shirt you had picked out for him last week.

When he’d came in to your dingy apartment, he’d removed his (probably very expensive) cufflinks and tossed them in your countertop dish.

“You shouldn’t treat your things so carelessly,” you chastised, taking them from the dish and moving them somewhere safer. Even in the cheap incandescent light, the large stones twinkle softly and you wondered how much they cost.

“They’re very pretty.”

‘What?” He’d glanced up briefly from his phone to see what you were holding. “Oh you like those? I can send them to my jeweler and get them set into earrings for you if you want.”

You nearly drop the cufflinks.

When he stands he bumps his head on an open cabinet.

He’s a bit befuddled for a moment and sends the cabinet door a look, but it quickly melts into a grin when he hears you giggle.

“Hey, don’t laugh. I’m six foot and this kitchen is literally made for someone who’s like five-nothing.”

God, you wanted to take a swim in those dimples.

You get off the couch and walk over, opening the second drawer to pull out a whisk and offer it to him.

“You’re the one who wanted to come to the dump which is my apartment, Joon.” It’s a matter-of-fact tone, but you can’t hide the twinkle in your eyes.

“I wanted to make you that dalgona coffee thing. But I don't have instant coffee at home. I didn’t know if it works with normal espresso.”

“You’re telling me you have a thirteen thousand dollar coffee machine at your place, and no instant coffee.”

Namjoon makes a face. “Instant coffee tastes like dishwater.”

You grab the bottle of instant coffee and shove it in his face.

“I love it.”

Namjoon shakes his head and grabs the glass jar from you, delivering a swift peck on your cheek.

“I love you.”

You blush, one hand going up to cup your face. To hell with butterflies in your stomach, this man truly gave the zoo a run for its money.

You’d met him while waitressing at one of those fancy fundraiser gala dinners. It paid the best, and between struggling to feed yourself and those overdue college bills, you were ready to swallow your pride and deal with the pompous crowd for a little while.

Namjoon had always thought it was a blessing he’d survived thirty three years not having broken a bone (well, he’s caused other people to break their bones, but that doesn’t count.) But that night, accidentally spilling his wine on you was the one time Namjoon ever felt truly lucky that he was a clumsy oaf.

You looked like a little deer, flustered and apologising, reaching for the nearest stack of napkins to fuss over the cuff of his jacket, when he should have been the one apologising to you. The two of you at a later point have recounted this first meeting and you still can’t believe he finds it hilarious that you were horrified, on the verge of tears because you thought he’d expect you to pay for his jacket.

Though you later understand why he’d find that funny. One thing more genuinely beautiful than his face was Namjoon’s heart. He’d insisted he book you a cab home (after understanding you didn’t have a spare shirt), and settled with your manager that you’d be taking the rest of the night off.

The next day he caught you by surprise, showing up on your doorstep in a cream cable knit sweater, and a black gift box adorned with a white camellia in hand (half out of apology, but also because he needed an excuse to see you). You’d opened the door, let out a strangled squeak and promptly slammed the door shut in his face. Later, he did get invited in when you didn’t so closely resemble a drenched version of Dobby, but it was unlikely you’d ever forget the horror of that moment.

Of course at first, your relationship was merely transactional - he paid you for your company, mostly at more of these fancy galas where he needed someone to distract the crowd while he really talked shop with the important people, and you.. well who were you, a mere mortal, to say no to that? It would get your bills paid, put food on the table, and Namjoon was kind, intelligent and not bad to look at.

Okay fine, he was great to look at.

Sure he’d been divorced once, but everyone has skeletons in their closets, right? Namjoon’s closet was three times the size of your apartment so there’d be plenty space to hide them. (Later, much later, you also become privy to the information that the guy could fuck you six ways from Sunday, but that’s besides the point… you think.)

After the parties on the way home you’d started to linger in his car. He’d walk you up the stairs of your dingy apartment complex. You hold hands, his large one dwarfing yours as the both of you walk as slowly as possible up the entire ten flights.

It was dangerous for you to walk alone, he said, but really, Namjoon wanted to talk to you a little while longer. You were nothing like he’d ever known. You were quiet. Listening. But really listening, not just waiting for your turn to talk. So different to the ditzy socialites in his circle who wanted only to talk about themselves.

Its not long before you're inviting him in for coffee - he drank your dishwater coffee quietly for the next three months before he suggested going to his place where the ‘real coffee’ was.

You fell fast, and you fell hard.

Not that you didn’t have your share of heated romances with people your age, but none of them really got you, listened to you as intently as he did when you rambled on about the inequality and hegemony of this world. You chalk it up to the fact that you’ve always been more mature than others - a result of circumstance. Not by choice, really, but it was what it was.

Namjoon always carried an air of introspection around him. Not intentionally. Many people took that for pride, but you realised quickly it was quiet confidence. He liked to listen and learn and observe.

On your coffee nights he begins to give you a glimpse of who he really is. Undoubtedly, he’s a Kim. That cool, nonchalant disposition was his battle armor. But beneath that you come to see the man who when you ask him about the telescope in the corner of his study, tells you he still entertains his childhood dream of being an astronaut. That on clear nights he likes to read Carl Sagan and look at the stars, wondering about the kind of lives they lead.

You learn he’s a great big klutz that breaks the handles off his cabinets ‘by accident’. You see the soft side that sometimes likes to read children’s books because ‘some of the best lessons in life are simple and humble ones’. And eventually the side that suddenly pulls you in closer in his sleep to his chest on rainy nights because he hates thunder. You always wake because you’re a light sleeper, but you’re glad you are, reaching up to smooth the furrow between his brows gently with a thumb before cuddling deeper into his embrace.

It’s also the first time he smiled at you. It was the week before his birthday, you’d given him a little resin keychain with little pressed wildflowers. He’d gone silent for quite a while and you didn’t know if he hated it or loved it.

“It’s a keychain.”

“Yeah.. It’s not much but I made it in a resin art workshop I went to, you have everything already and I hadn’t any idea what I could afford that you’d need-“

“You made this?” He interrupts, looking up at you.

You feel your gut shrivel. Jesus Christ. He hates it.

Immediately you move toward him to remove your offending gift. You were a Tiny Bit Hurt, but what had you been expecting with a cheap thing like that?

“If you don’t like it, it’s okay. You don’t have to use it! I just thought because you call me your little wildflower you’d like - “

You can’t finish your sentence because your face is smushed into Namjoon’s (very nice, very broad) chest as he pulls you into a crushing hug.

Horror takes over slightly and you struggle to move away. “Namjoon, I’m wearing so much foundation, and you’re in a cream Givenchy sweater - “

“I love it.”

You stop struggling. His warm breath tickles your ear, one large hand cradling the back of your head.

“You do?”

“I do. I love that you put in all this effort. You are my little wildflower. Always blooming in surprising places.’

You hug him back, nuzzling into his scent. The Givenchy sweater could wait. There was always drycleaning.

“And now I’ll have something to remind me of you wherever I go.”

When he pulls back to look at you he’s sporting not just one of those polite half smiles, but a full on beaming grin that make his eyes into smiling crescents. You get to see how deep his dimples actually are.

You swooned so hard you thought you might’ve given yourself an aneurysm.

Well, fast forward a year and here you are.

Watching the owner of a global business conglomerate make you some silly whipped coffee drink in the kitchen of your tiny apartment with water stains on the wallpaper, his diamond cufflinks sitting in a repurposed butter spread tray that held coins and keys on your countertop.

Watching your klutz boyfriends, ad he jerks the whisk at an odd angle and gets foamy coffee splattered all over the front of his white shirt.

'Joon, that’s Dior.” Your face crumples. Grabbing a towel out of the drawer, you wet it and try to dab the coffee stains off. That shirt was so expensive, it could pay your rent for three months.

You knew and had come to terms with the fact that money would always worry him far, far less than it worried you, but seeing such an expensive item go to waste would never stop making you a little bit unhappy. Well, there was more to it, but you shoved those thoughts away.

Namjoon sets the bowl down on the counter.

“It’s okay, love. I’ll just get a new one if the stains don't come off.”

You scrub harder.

After a silent moment, Namjoon puts his hands over yours to still them. “It’s not just about the shirt, is it?”

He waits for you, like he always does because he knows you need a little time. He’d wormed his way into the deepest parts of your heart, but there would always be a final little fence you had to decide to take down. He was okay with that.

After a minute, you nod. Gently, he takes the dishcloth from you and sets it aside so he can hold your hands properly. Times like these he just wants to hug you and hope that would be enough to protect you from the world. You taught him that money, as much as it solved problems, was not everything.

He puts a finger under your chin and tips it up so he can see your face.

“I just..”

“Go on.” He encourages.

“I know we’ve been through this before, but I can’t help but feel like I’m a… I’m a burden.”

Funny, considering how you two started out. The sugar baby/parent lifestyle just wasn’t for you. You were a Bad Ass Bitch who didn't need anyone, and it was important to stay on brand.

“Like, I keep being on the receiving end and sometimes I just feel like I can’t do anything for you. You spend so much money on me. The other day after we went shopping you bought me such lovely fruits to stock my fridge, and even got me a new heater for my room when it’s cold, and now you’re making me coffee because I sent you that post on Instagram and I just….

“If you didn’t have to come to my stupid old apartment you shirt would still be clean and I …“ You gesture vaguely at him and then at yourself.

“You give me so much. And well, I’m… just me.” You say finally.

Namjoon’s just been listening as you ramble, face unreadable. He;s got his business face on and you can’t tell if he’s angry with you or not.

“So you feel like you can’t do anything for me.”

You nod.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding the topic every time I ask you to move in with me?”

You nod again.

“Look, _____. I want you to listen to me. Like really listen.” His hands move to cup your face, eyes now staring intently into yours.

“You give me something in this world no amount of money can buy. You make me feel whole. You make me feel excited that I get to do life’s most mundane things with you. Even if it involves drinking dishwater coffee.”

That last part gets a small smile out of you, so he knows you’re in the clear.

“I know you’re not used to receiving nice things, because the world hasn’t given you much of it. I hate that. What I do for you, I do with my whole heart. I will continue to want to do these things for you for as long as you’ll let me.

“And maybe if I keep doing them one day you will see how everything, everything I do for you pales terribly in comparison to what you give to me by just existing.”

You’re so overwhelmed with emotion so you just respond lamely “o..okay.”

In your head, your two braincells clap enthusiastically as they crown you honorary president of the Idiot Club.

Namjoon sighs and rests his hands on the countertop on either side of you so he can look at you eye to eye. You look so pretty like this, he thinks. Eyes vulnerable and lips soft, just like you should be. He hates the world for treating you so cruelly.

“And for the record, I insist on spending time here I noticed you’re more… yourself than at my place. I want you to feel comfortable.”

“That’s not true.” You raise your chin petulantly, because you’re slightly prideful that way and don't want to acknowledge that Namjoon sees through you clear as day.

“Don’t argue with me.”

Namjoon narrows his eyes fractionally, his gaze darkening, and suddenly you’re very aware that you’re caged in. Not that you were complaining but was it suddenly really hot in here?

“I’m not arguing.”

“Yes you are." He's lowered his voice and its taken on a huskier tone.

“You know that everything I do, I do out of love for you. And I will damn well put up with your apartment with no complaints if it means you will feel more at ease.”

This man was going to give you whiplash with the way he made the most loving words sound like filth.

You lower your gaze, just the way you know he likes, and look up at him through your lashes. Two could play that game. You see a spark ignite in his eyes.

“I know.”

“You know, what?”

“I know, sir.”

“Good. Now why don’t I finish making you that coffee, and then we can go back to my place and we’ll see what you really know.”

With that, he releases you to get the milk from the fridge, and you spin around to place one hand on the countertop and one hand over your chest. You suck in a breath you didn’t know you were holding. A few seconds longer and you’d have -

A sharp cracking noise from behind you quickly sweeps any indecent thoughts clean out of your mind.

You turn to find Namjoon looking at you with an incredibly apologetic expression, holding a black piece of plastic which what seems to be -

“Did you break the handle off my fridge?”

Three days later he’s sporting the same apologetic expression, the only difference is that you two are separated by a towering, stainless steel monstrosity that now sits in the middle of your living room, leaving you two to converse by having to look around the sides of it.

“I’m sorry, ___. I didn’t know it’d be this big.”

“That’s what she said.”

You peer around the corner with a cheeky grin. He gives you a look that’s half withering and half amused. “Mature.”

Reassessing the appliance in front of you, you throw your hands up in the air.

“For the love of sweet god, Namjoon. This fridge is ridiculous. I’m not feeding the entire village. You’ve seen my apartment, how did you think this was going to work?!”

“I dont know, okay? I just called my home decor guys and told them to send you the same fridge I have!”

You sigh heavily and shut your eyes. The man was so intelligent, but days like this you wonder if sometimes his brain took unpaid leave.

“My house is literally a third the size of your closet.”

If this wasn’t your house you might have found it a little bit funny. But it is your house.

You wait, but there’s just silence from his end, so you continue.

“What do you expect me to do with this monstrosity? Take a fucking winter holiday in it?! We can’t even -“ you kick the sofa for emphasis.

Pausing because he’s still unusually quiet, you stretch to look around the fridge again. He’s on his phone, tapping away in furious concentration.

“What are you doing?”

“Give me a minute.”

Oh no.

“What are you doing.”

“Relax, my love, I’m fixing the problem.” He waves you off nonchalantly. “Give me a minute.”

“Are you calling the delivery men to take this back?”

There is a genuinely confused look on his face when he looks up.

“What? No. Don’t be silly. I’m texting my real estate agents. They’re getting you a new house so this fridge will fit.”

#joonclouds #namjoon #bts namjoon #namjoon fluff #namjoon fic #bts fic

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bee-kathony · 5 years

Photo

The Oath | Ch. 2 “Strange Whisky Man”

a/n: thank you SO much to everyone who read and left comments on the first chapter! It means everything to me when I read that you liked this story. I hope you enjoy this chapter <3

Ch. 1

January 21, 2019

When Claire opened her eyes to the sun streaming through the window over the white linen sheets, her mind was blank. For a few brief, quiet moments, she forgot the events of the past twelve hours. But then as she turned to her side and realized she wasn’t in her own bed, she remembered why and fear crept in.

What the bloody hell was she going to do?

She moved in with Frank three years ago when they came to Edinburgh after she graduated from university. Their home was her home. A place where they had both created memories, shared Christmases and even talked about getting married.

As she sat up, her hands moved to her forehead, pressing against the temples to ease the throbbing ache. She was going to take things one day at a time. And after all… Geillis had said she could stay as long as she needed to, thank God she had a spare room.

Feeling a bit lost without her phone, Claire sighed as she put one foot after the other on the carpeted floor and stood. Her joints popped as she stretched her hands high above her head.

“You can do this, Beauchamp.” Claire took a deep breath and steeled herself for the day, ready to face whatever new challenges came at her.

When she walked out into Geillis’ living room, she was surprised to see boxes of her stuff sitting on the floor.

“Geillis?” She called out, walking through the house to find her friend.

“In the kitchen!”

The red headed woman was standing in front of the stove, spatula in hand, flipping bloody pancakes. Claire felt overwhelmed by so many different emotions and walked over to Geillis and wrapped her arms around her.

“Oh, Claire.” Geillis smiled and wrapped one arm around her waist. “Ye alright, lass?”

“I will be,” Claire smiled as best she could. “I just… love you a lot. You’ve picked up my stuff from my shitty ex and now you’re making pancakes.”

“Aye,” Geillis grinned and then turned back to the stove. “I’m just doin’ all these nice things for ye so someday when I need a favor, ye have no choice but to help.”

Claire scoffed, “I don’t think I have a choice whether I help you or not. Geillis Duncan does not simply ask, she demands.” They both laughed at the truth of the statement. When Claire had first moved to Edinburgh, she had been quite reserved and was slow to make friends. Geillis had spoken to her on her first day of work and Claire knew they would hit it off.

Her friend was also usually right about everything. Last night, Geillis had mentioned how she never felt right around Frank and now there was a reason why. He was a cheater, a liar and a manipulative bastard.

Biting the inside of her cheek to keep the tears at bay, Claire walked over to the cabinet, grabbing a glass for water.

“Did you get my phone by chance? I hope I don’t have too many missed messages.”

“Och, aye I did. I plugged it in on my charger in my room, ye can go and get it.”

“Thank you again,” Claire smiled and went to fetch her phone. When she unlocked it, she had only one message from a colleague updating her about a patient who was in critical care. Thankfully all was well, but Claire felt a little depressed that she only had one missed message. She really needed to get out more.

Claire joined Geillis back in the kitchen and hopped up on the counter.

“So, what’s this distillery thing again?” She swung her crossed ankles back and forth in the air, trying for any conversation that would distract her from thinking about Frank.

“Tis a company called ‘Fraser & Co.’, a family business I think. Anyways, my friends Rupert and Angus ken the owners and asked if I wanted to tag along,” she smiled, waving the spatula in the air as she talked. “There’ll be free whisky all night long, a good reason to get sloshed eh?”

“Right. Sloshed,” Claire sighed. She hoped with time that she would regain some feeling, some sense of humanness but currently all emotion had simply been drained out of her.

“It is okay for ye to try and have fun tonight, Claire.” Geillis flipped the last pancake and then turned to face her. “I ken it’s been no even twenty-four hours and ye’ve every right to be heartbroken, but sometimes a girl just needs a few stiff drinks and one night to pretend she hasna been hurt.”

Geillis was right. Again. What Claire didn’t need to do was wallow in self pity, that would only get her nowhere. And besides, she didn’t exactly want to keep crying over Frank fucking Randall — he didn’t deserve her tears.

“I’ll try my best,” she offered a warm smile and satisfied with her answer, Geillis turned back to the pancakes.

“Good. I’ll be by yer side the entire night and if ye ever want to ditch, just let me know,” the red haired woman drizzled warm syrup over the fluffy pancakes and just as she passed the plate into Claire’s hands, her stomach growled.

“Christ, I’m starving!” She laughed, took the fork offered to her and dove in. “Haven’t eaten since lunch yesterday, I’ve no idea what got in the way of dinner last night,” she said sarcastically.

Kicking her in the shin lightly, Geillis laughed. “Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp isna lost to the world after all.”

++++++

It took Claire a bit longer than she expected to find something to wear tonight and no surprise there since all of her stuff had been quickly packed into boxes. In reality, she didn’t own a lot of clothes or personal items.

Perhaps it was because when her parents died, she had moved around a lot with Lamb. He was an archaeologist and so every few months, they traveled to a different country which meant hoarding things like band t-shirts, books and any other normal teenage girl items were out of the question.

Once on her way home from work, Claire had passed by a store with a lovely display of vases and almost purchased one. She wasn’t exactly sure why she didn’t buy it — after all, she had a home with Frank and a table or mantle to place it on. She had stability.

Had.

Muttering things to herself like, “foolish woman, should have noticed,” Claire took her time getting ready. Opting for simple black fitted jeans and a cozy sweater, her next task was to tame her curls.

Growing up, she hated having curly hair and had always wished for straight hair like her mother. But Julia Beauchamp had insisted that Claire learn to love her curls and also how to properly take care of them.

Proper care was thrown out the window when she traveled around with Lamb and since then, she hadn’t taken up putting in the effort again. It wasn’t that her hair was unkempt, but it often resembled a bird’s nest… an inviting one nonetheless.

Forcing herself to wear a little bit of foundation and mascara, Claire put the brush down and looked at herself in the mirror.

“Not bad, Beauchamp.”

When she walked out to where Geillis was waiting, she stopped and stared at her friend. She was wearing a short black dress with a deep v-cut and thigh high boots. It was January… in Scotland.

“What? Too slutty ye think?” Geillis followed Claire’s gaze and looked down at herself.

“No, no not at all,” Claire whistled, her eyes wide and then laughed. “You look great actually, but now I feel rather frumpy.”

Giving her a once over, Geillis screwed up her face, “Aye, ye do, but ye have an excuse. It’s no like yer goin’ to be keen on talkin’ to any men. So this way they’ll be sure to stay away!”

“Geillis!” Claire gasped, feigning shock and hit her playfully on the arm. “Okay, now you look like a slut.”

“Grandma,” Geillis retorted and then grabbed her car keys.

++++++

The grand opening party for Fraser & Co. was being held at the owner’s estate according to Geillis’ friend Rupert. The two women had picked up their two companions, also Scots of course and made the short journey to Lallybroch. From the little Claire knew of Gaelic, the word ‘Lallybroch’ meant something like ‘lazy tower’ and she very was interested to see if such a tower existed.

“So, Claire,” Angus leaned forward from the backseat, his face a bit too close to Claire’s to be completely comfortable, “How long have ye known our lass, Geillis?”

Avoiding unnecessary contact, Claire leaned forward so that her back was at an awkward angle and turned her head towards Angus. “Almost three years, feels like ages though.”

“How come we’ve ne’vr met ye then?”

“Claire doesna get out much, ye ken,” Geillis chimed in. “She’s a big boss lady and doesna have time to hang out wi’ the lower class.”

Claire nudged her friend in the side, rolling her eyes. “You know that’s not true. It was Frank who insisted on spending all of my free time with him.”

“Who’s Frank?” Rupert, the burlier of the two men asked.

“No one important anymore,” Claire said and put an end quickly to that rabbit hole.

A short time later, they arrived at their destination. It wasn’t very late in the day, 7pm to be exact, but the sun had set a long time ago and so the only lights on the estate were hundreds of twinkling fairy lights hung all around. The home looked absolutely magical and Claire decided that this is what all typical Scottish fairytale homes looked like.

They had arrived a bit later than expected due to getting lost in the dark and therefore had missed the opening speech from the owners welcoming them to the launch. The four of them quickly found the open bar, however, and Claire was now onto her second whisky of the night.

Rupert had just told a joke that had made the entire crowd around them laugh in hysterics, but not Claire. While she enjoyed the company, her heart wasn’t in it to be surrounded by so many people.

“I’m just going to take a walk around, I’ll be fine,” She said to Geillis, giving her a cheerful smile as she slowly wormed her way out of the crowd.

As she stepped out of the house to get some fresh air and enjoy the pretty lights, Claire was thankful she had worn a comfy sweater instead of trying to give off the impression that she wasn’t absolutely freezing. Even with her hands tucked under the material of her sleeves, however, she still shivered.

“Yer shaking so hard, yer makin’ my teeth rattle just at the sight of ye.”

Jumping a little at the unexpected company, Claire looked over to her right and saw a very tall, broad, red haired man leaning against the wall.

“Do ye want a plaid or maybe a coat?” He asked her kindly and then approached her. She knew the man was waiting for an answer to his question, but when he came closer and she looked into his blue eyes, she forgot any language that made sense.

The man gave her an odd look and then reached out, waving his hand in front of her face and finally she shook her head, and her speech was restored.

“No, thank you. I’ll be just fine,” she smiled and then turned to head back inside the house. Claire had come outside to get away from people, and this man who made her incapable of coherent thought was getting in the way of that.

“Ye dinna seem like ye want to be around people,” He said just as her foot hit the first step.

“Your point is?” She gazed over at him, noticing the subtle quirk of his mouth, and the deep auburn shine to his curly hair.

“I ken of a place wi’ a few less people is all,” he smiled and before she could tell herself no and to go find Geillis and ask to go home, Claire retraced her steps and came to stand in front of the man once again.

“Show me, then.”

Observing that she had come outside for to find quiet, the man didn’t speak as he lead them around the estate and to a large stable. Only when he disappeared inside an office looking room and returned with a plaid, did Claire speak.

“Thank you,” she smiled, accepting his kind gesture to keep her warm.

“Dinna fash. Canna have ye freezin’ to death!” He laughed — a deep laugh that made Claire want to tell a joke just so she could hear it again.

“So why did you bring me to the stables?” She asked and took a few steps in, looking around at the horses that were in their stalls.

“Och, I always find the company of a horse to be more favorable than people,” the man said and walked up next to her, his hands down at his sides.

“I’ve never ridden a horse before,” Claire mused out loud and came to stand in front of a stall with a beautiful black horse. “Don’t know anything about them really.”

For whatever reason, Claire felt comfortable in this stranger’s presence. Perhaps it was being around the horses, but as he stood next to her, she suddenly longed to know everything about him.

“Ye are a Sassenach,” the man chortled, “That doesna exactly surprise me.”

Claire looked up at him and was once again struck by the blueness of his eyes. “A Sassenach?” She pronounced the word slowly, trying to mimic his accent.

His eyebrows shot up and an amused look crossed his face, “I only mean English, tis another term for ye… an outlander.”

“Hmmm, I hope it’s used affectionately,” she snorted a bit and then covered her mouth with her hand. Only did she snort when she felt totally relaxed and right now she blamed the alcohol.

The man only laughed and then suddenly disappeared back into the office. Claire mentally shrugged and wrapped the plaid tighter around her body, returning her attention back to the horse in front of her.

“Would ye like a dram?” The man said from behind her and she turned to see him holding two glasses of whisky.

“What do you own the place or something?” She laughed, remarking at his ability to produce items from seemingly out of nowhere but took the glass he offered her.

The scot stiffened beside her, his left hand tapping twitchy fingers along his thigh. “Och, I ken the owner a wee bit.”

“I see. And he has no problem with you showing random strangers his stable and drinking his hidden whisky?”

The man grinned over his glass, “None at all.”

Claire wondered exactly who he was, but decided not to push further. She took a sip, letting it burn her throat and then took a seat on the bench near the entrance. The man awkwardly stood frozen in place, unsure of what to do but ultimately took a seat beside her.

“What do ye think of the whisky?”

He was sitting very close to her and she could smell his aftershave — minty with a hint of spice that lingered in her nostrils. The man also radiated heat and she no longer felt the need of the plaid, letting it fall off one shoulder.

“It’s very good,” she smiled and remembering the glass in her hand took another sip.

“I’ll be sure to let the owner know that a beautiful Sassenach who’s never ridden a horse in her life enjoys his whisky,” the man said with a cheeky grin and Claire had the sudden urge to poke him in the stomach. So she did.

“Och! What was that for?” He laughed, rubbing at the spot she had poked him.

“Sorry,” she bit her bottom lip to keep from laughing but ultimately burst into a fit of giggles, one so strong that tears filled her eyes.

“Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ,” she sighed as her laugh began to wind down. The man stared at her, clearly amused, but also maybe a bit frightened at this hysterical woman he had engaged in polite conversation with.

“Are ye alright, Sassenach?” He asked and she thought that he genuinely cared to know the answer.

The simple answer was yes, she was just a bit tipsy, but the real answer was far more complicated.

“I’m not really sure,” she said truthfully, earning her a distinctly Scottish noise from beside her.

“I didna expect such an honest answer,” the man grinned, his eyes full of sympathy.

“I’m not usually one to pour my heart out to a complete stranger,” Claire took another sip of whisky. “But you make me comfortable strange whisky man.”

“Strange whisky man? Yeesh,” the man chuckled and then offered his hand out to her. “Jamie, madam. Pleasure to meet ye.”

It took her a moment to move her own hand into his, but when her skin made contact with his, a bolt of electricity shot up her arm and she dropped the nearly empty glass onto the ground, making them both jump. Glass shattered at their feet, and Claire cursed herself for being so clumsy.

“Dinna move, Sassenach. I dinna want yer wee feet getting hurt,” Jamie stood and carefully avoided the glass. He went into the small office and came back with a small broom and dustpan. That room really did have a bit of everything.

“I’m so sorry,” Claire said. “I’ll buy the owner another glass. Christ, Beauchamp!”

“Dinna fash, Sassenach. Tis alright, I ken he willna mind, besides ’twas an accident,” he brushed up the remaining bits of glass and dumped it in a waste bin. With a final check to the area, Jamie offered both his hands to Claire and she took them, once again feeling that same buzz on her skin.

“Thank you,” she said quietly.

“For what?” Jamie hadn’t let go of her hands and she was fine if he never did.

“For cleaning up my mess.”

“I think I’d do anythin’ for ye, Sassenach.”

The air between them was so charged, so electric that Claire was sure if a match was struck, they’d both burst into flames on the spot.

Jamie’s hand moved from hers and slipped around her waist, holding her close to his body and she felt the heat of him against her skin. There was nothing else that mattered in this moment other than the thought of what his lips would taste like on hers.

She didn’t have to wait long to find out.

“Sassenach,” Jamie whispered and she stood on her toes and paused, her lips a breath away from his.

“Kiss me.” And he did.

Chapter 3: “Nooks & Books”

#the oath #chapter 2 #outlander fanfic #jamie x claire #jamie fraser #claire beauchamp #strange whisky man #lfkdjsflkdjs #i love this chapter ngl

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aquarius-johnny · 5 years

Text

Plan C | Johnny Seo

Requested: - | Word Count: 2k | Warnings: Mentions of a miscarriage, Johnny x Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff, Slight Angst

Author’s Notes: There is angst because why not, but there is also Johnny that’s being all cute and excited about being a father. Also, the last post for fluff Fridays in February!

Summary: Although traumatized by a painful past, you tell Johnny you’re pregnant and he’s nothing but excited to be a daddy.

As you struggle to push your house key into the front door’s lock, your frustration grows. All you want to do is curl into your bed with a warm blanket over you and sleep until the headache and dizziness you’ve been feeling goes away. To say you weren’t feeling like yourself is an understatement; to put in simpler terms, you felt like utter shit and your body aches did not help one bit. You waved it off as your job had you sitting down all day, causing your back pains, but you had this job for years with no problems.

You were greeted by a unified scream followed by laughter and bickering language. Dropping your bag onto the dark wooden floor by the entrance, you sluggishly move into the living room where you see Johnny and his group of friends yelling at one another over a game of monopoly. Plates of take-out were pushed to the edge of the coffee table while the board game sat right in the middle with miniature pieces on the squares.

“This is the second time I’ve been sent to jail,” Mark pouts, moving it piece to the designated block.

“You’re getting in my way,” Haechan retorts, a playful eye roll follows as he sees Mark’s little piece in jail along with two other pieces.

“Hey!” Johnny greets, walking over to you before pulling you into a warm hug. “Tough day?” He asks, smoothing the mess you called your hair after the wind ruined it on your way home.

“You can say that,” you mumbled against his chest.

The other boys take notice of Johnny’s actions and greet you with a hug, one by one.

“You look different,” Taeyong states, pulling away from you after giving you a hug.

“I’m tired, that’s all.”

“No, it’s not that. You look healthier, like in the face.”

You cock your head to the side and chuckle a little. “Thank you?” You watch him take his seat, next to one of his friends, fully immersed in the game.

“Wanna join?” Johnny smiles. “You can take my piece.”

Scanning the board in search for the piece Johnny always takes a certain liking to, you notice it sitting in the game’s jail next to Mark’s. “Nice try, but I’m not getting you out of jail.” Shaking your head, you leave the room and walk over to the kitchen to grab a drink. The aroma of coffee brewing fills your nostrils and you automatically feel your stomach churn. You could feel everything you had for lunch that day coming back up, so you quickly rush to the sink and puke your guts out. The next thing you knew, Johnny was right behind you holding your hair back, similar to the drunken nights you had while you two first started dating.

“Okay, you really need to go to the doctor. This has been going on for a few days now and I’m seriously starting to worry,” he presses, handing you a paper towel before helping you clean up.

“I’m fine,” you try to argue, but you come off sounding weaker than you wanted.

“No, you’re not. If I have to drag your ass to the doctor’s office, I will.” His comment makes you laugh a little, knowing he would do exactly that. “Just promise me you’ll go.”

“Okay,” you nod, attempting to help him clean up your mess only to be shushed away.

“I’ll make you some soup.”

“It’s okay. I’m going to shower and just head to bed.”

Washing his hand and wiping it on his jeans, he gives you a kiss on your forehead and watches you disappear from the kitchen.

Your legs dangled off the exam table as you wait for your doctor to enter the examination room. The four white walls are plastered with inspirational posters and reminders to get the flu shot. A knock on the light brown wooden door startles you a bit and a familiar face walks in. The usual introductions ensue and your doctor asks why you’re in there in which you reply with your symptoms.

“When was the last time you were sexually active?” Your doctor asks.

“Last weekend,” you shyly reply, looking down.

Your doctor nods. “And when is the last time you got your menstrual period?” Taking notes, your physician patiently awaits for your answer.

“About three months ago.” “Are you usually late or irregular?”

“When I’m stressed,”

A few more awkward questions follow and you give a urine sample to take a pregnancy test. When your doctor comes back, you’re hit with the news that you’re expecting. You leave your appointment with prenatal vitamins and an appointment for your first ultrasound.

When you got home, you went straight into your room. Searching through your closet, you finally find the item you hid away that carried the most painful memory you ever had. About a year after marrying Johnny, you found out you two were expecting. It was Johnny’s idea to have a book to track your pregnancy progress. You two were the most excited you two had ever been. Everything felt like it was falling into place until 3 months into your pregnancy and the entries stopped. You were certain the whole tragedy would break up your marriage with Johnny. Thankfully it didn’t, but you weren’t sure if you could deal with it if it happened again. Later that night, you felt Johnny’s arms wrap around you as he joined you in bed.

“How was your appointment?” He whispers, pulling your back into him. Moving your hair back, he places a soft kiss against your shoulder.

“It was fine. I’m not sick or anything,” you simply tell him. You interlock his fingers with his, before bringing his hand to your lips.

Johnny didn’t say anything else and neither did you.

Walking into the examination room, you lay on the bed as the technician read your chart before setting up the sonogram machine. A cold jell like substance touched your stomach and soon enough, you saw an image pop up on the screen. You couldn’t help but smile which quickly disappeared after remembering Johnny wasn’t there. The technician gladly printed a copy of the sonogram for you which you carefully place in your bag. When you got home, you find Johnny changing the bedsheets.

“Hey, do you need help carrying in the groceries?” He asks, scanning your empty hands.

“I didn’t go to the grocery store,” you confess, eyeing the note that’s still on the nightstand. You take the ultrasound picture out of your bag and hand it to Johnny as he changed the pillow’s sheets. “I had an ultrasound appointment.”

He drops the pillow and takes the picture. Looking at you shocked, he stared at the photo in his hand. “Y-you’re pregnant?” He asks, walking towards you. Taking a look at your figure, he doesn’t notice any signs of change.

“I found out when I went to the doctor.” Sitting on your stripped bed, Johnny takes notice of your mood. Taking a seat next to you, he already knew what you were thinking.

“Do you want to keep it?” He wonders. Every part of his being wanted you to say yes. And you did. You wanted to keep it. “What’re you thinking about?” He asks, already knowing the answer.

“What if it happens again?” Your words came out as a whisper. “I don’t know if I can go through that again.”

Johnny squats in front of you, lifting your chin to have your eyes meet with his. “You can’t keep thinking like that, babe. It’ll kill you.” You felt your eyes well up, recalling the conversation you had with your doctor as you laid in a hospital bed. “The doctor said there wasn’t anything you could do. There wasn’t anything you did that contributed to what happened.” Waterworks fall from your eyes and Johnny uses his thumb to wipe them away. “If it happens again - god forbid it does - you won’t go through it alone. I promise, okay?” His reassuring words make you smile before he pulls you into the warmest hug.

“Are you a little mad?” You ask suddenly, looking up at him as the sonogram is still in his hand.

“I wish you told me so I could join you instead of doing chores but no, I’m not mad. In fact, I’m ecstatic!” He pulls you into another hug and twirls you around, earning fits of giggles from you. “We’re having a baby!” He laughs, gently setting you down. “Can we do another pregnancy progress album like the one we started?”

Giving him a chuckle, you nod your head. Johnny quickly grabs his camera, you moved against your white wall, and turn to show the profile of your soon-to-be growing stomach. You hear the shutter of his camera a few times to get the right shot.

This continued over the course of your pregnancy. You kept your growing belly hidden with oversized sweaters and lived in nothing but black yoga pants that helped slim your figure. At the beginning of your third trimester, you decided to tell your friends and family you were expecting during the Thanksgiving holiday. Johnny’s parents had invited you and your parents to family dinner to their place. In the middle of dinner, your husband makes a toast calling everyone’s attention. Breaking the exciting news, an eruption of gasps and congratulatory outbursts flood your personal space. Johnny’s mom claps in excitement, clinging onto her husband’s arm as she tells him how they’re going to finally be grandparents. You look over to your mom who says she had a feeling after seeing you a few times and your father who pulls Johnny to the side to personally congratulate him on being a father. A week later, Johnny shares the news to his friends during dinner at your place.

“We all kind of knew that already,” Yuta teases, taking a sip of water. “Is it a boy or a girl?”

“Girl,” you jump into the conversation. Looking up at Johnny, he has a small smile on his face knowing how delighted he was to have a baby girl. Everyone else seemed just as thrilled as he was.

“Oh, she’s definitely going to be spoiled by you,” Taeyong laughs at Johnny who shrugs his shoulders in defeat.

Inching closer and closer to your due date, you’re finally towards the end of your third trimester with one more week to go before your due date. After Johnny’s birthday dinner, you two lay in bed: you in your oversized shirt and him in nothing but his underwear. Looking through your pregnancy progress album that Johnny put together, you feel your husband lift your shirt and his cheek is pressed against your skin. You don’t bother asking what he was doing since it was something he did every night.

“Did you eat well? That restaurant was expensive,” he speaks against your stomach, giving your baby bump a little giggle. He wasn’t expecting a reply until you two felt a small kick that caused you to look at each other in shock. Turning your attention back to what you two were previously doing, you scan through the photos your husband took after every few weeks next to the sonograms. Rubbing your tummy, Johnny hums a familiar lullaby against your skin, and you feel the sense of pain you felt all night, increase. Wincing under his cheek, you push his head off of you and stand up, holding the edge of your bed for support.

“What’s going on?” Looking at you concerned, Johnny rushes over to your side.

You feel your undergarments begin to soak and liquid run down your leg. Eyes widened, you look up at Johnny.

“Call our parents and tell them to meet us at the hospital.”

Johnny obediently follows suit. “Is everything okay?” He asks as his phone is pressed against his ear all while pulling his pants up his thighs.

“My water just broke.” Johnny’s jaw drops and his phone nearly falls to the floor from shock. “It’s time.”

#j*#johnny seo #nct johnny #nct johnny seo #nct #nct 127 #nct 127 johnny #nct 127 johnny seo #johnny seo fluff #nct fluff #nct scenarios #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 scenarios #genre:fluff #au:dad!johnny #johnny suh #nct johnny suh

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thedistantstorm · 4 years

Text

Dawning Delights 05: Ugly Sweaters

Summary: Hawthorne invites her newfound family in the Tower to experience a City-Style Dawning with the family that took her in years ago. The holiday is not without it’s charm, or aggravation, and certainly has plenty of surprises in store. A season-inspired, trope-tastic story about a family forged by something greater than blood, finding reasons to enjoy the season - and cherish each other. Main Post

Pairings: Hawthorne/Zavala, Sloane/Amanda, Devrim/Marc

Updated every Tuesday/Friday & both holiday eve and days for Christmas and New Years.

Weeks ago, she'd asked him.

"Do you think you could make me a sweater? Y'know, one of those tacky ones, for the Dawning?"

"Are you insinuating something about my craft?" Blue eyes hold hers, not an ounce of amusement present in their depths.

"No! Not at all!" She frowns and glowers when he shows amusement at her immediate retcon. "Wait, are you pulling my leg? You are!" She hops up off the sofa, scandalized. "I'm hurt. That's low."

He rolls his eyes. "Sit back down, Suraya." Ever reasonable, he informs her, "There's not enough time to make you a sweater."

She tucks herself back against him, making her irritation known. "Look... Don't I get priority? Special treatment?"

"You get plenty of special treatment," He reminds her, eyebrows dipping into something suggestive. "But I only make three sweaters a year. One for Amanda, and then two for whomever else asks me first."

"And you didn't think that I'd want one?!"

"You have a poncho. I didn't know that you'd participate."

"You're kidding me, right? Me. The person who is throwing all of you a holiday bash?" She pulls back to look at him properly. "Tell me you at least have an old one I can borrow!"

"No. I wear the same one each year."

She sighs. Minimalist bastard, she thinks, but there’s no anger behind it. "Alright, well who else did you make an ugly Sweater for?"

"Jalaal and Eva."

"You're kidding me." She slaps her thighs. "Eva I get. But Jalaal? Really?"

"I've already handed them out. Ask me next year."

Suraya scoffs, but she knows that if he said no, it's not that he doesn't want to, but that he won't commit to something he can't do. "I'm asking you right now. I want one."

"For next year?"

"Yeah. With a bird on it."

He swings his gaze over to the falcon near the window, napping comfortably upon his perch. He nods, pressing his lips to her forehead. "I'll see what I can do."

That, in Zavala speak, is an agreement, and she hums in approval before returning to her initial issue. "I have no idea where to get an ugly sweater."

"You could wear mismatching colors," Zavala suggests, but it’s not as though either of them really pay attention to what colors match versus mismatch, anyway.

She shrugs, burrowing into his side. It isn't often they get to enjoy each other's company during the day when they're not at work. "I don't want to win Amanda's contest, but I'd like to at least have something festive, y'know?"

"I understand. You could try Tess-"

"And pay a million glimmer for something itchy and polyester? No."

Zavala chuckles. "I thought you refused to become a ‘textile snob,’” He airquotes, “As you so kindly told me the last time I expressed my disdain for synthetics."

Blowing a raspberry - that should be enough of a concession, she supposes, she says, "I like being comfortable. I'll leave the specifics to you, but I wouldn’t consider myself a snob." She taps a finger to her lips. "Unless we're talking alpaca. That stuff is amazing and I wish it was waterproof."

"It is water resistant," He points out, to her amusement. Textile snob. "But I do know what you mean."

One thing she notices more and more as the season goes on is that the Guardians really get into the holiday. It's good for them, Suraya thinks. They're all wearing festively patterned cloaks and robes, she's even seen some very tacky and incredibly oversized jazzed-up pauldrons on a Titan. She slips her hands under the billowing flaps of her poncho and continues through the Courtyard. It's been very cold, and she's been spoiled to have relief from the elements a vast majority of the time since moving back to the City.

Her hood blows back and off and she rolls her eyes. The winds up here are far worse than on the ground. Up ahead, she sees a shivering figure and sighs.

When he notices her, she cannot help herself, shouting, "What were you thinking? I told you to wait for me at the bottom of the elevator!"

He holds up his hands placatingly and only then does she see the figure beside him.

"What're you doing here?"

Zavala smiles, looking first to make sure no one is around, then presses a quick, chaste kiss to her lips. "I was going into the City to get you something, but since ran into Marc. He said you are heading down to do some shopping, so I'll have you pick it up yourself."

The confusion that crosses her face makes Marc laugh. "Come on, darling, we have things to do to prepare." He takes Suraya's hand but looks to Zavala. "You're sure you don't want to join us?"

"I'm sure. You two have fun. I am going to try and get ahead on my work for the evening, when Amanda inevitably rounds us up for judging." He smiles at Suraya. "Perhaps make some reservations for dinner afterward, assuming we can sneak away."

"Psh, just wine and dine a girl, why don't you?" Her tone clashes with the wide grin that lights up her face.

"I know, I know." He nods to Marc, feigning exasperation. It lacks heat. "I will leave you to it."

"See you soon," Marc calls after him, before fixing Suraya with a thrilled look. "Okay. Lunch first or shopping?"

Suraya's stomach answers for her, and they laugh their way into the elevator. The snow flurries about in that magical festive way and Marc coos about how lovely the City looks from above as the lift carries them down. Never once does he let go of her hand. It reminds her of being younger, a child in braids wearing little red mittens, clomping through the snow behind her adoptive parents. It's something both novel and bittersweet to be back here now, to step out into the massive holiday bazaar that sets up at the foot of the new Tower. She might still feel a little bit like a sell out, but the City carries more and more of her heart every day.

After all, it houses so many of the people she's come to love, and is a testament to the people she does her best to lead and represent.

Marc leads her away from the Dawning market the moment they're on the ground, and instead takes her through a shoveled alley and down to the front of food stands that warm the surrounding street. Together they get street tacos and Marc babbles on about his decorations and plans for the main event, their big holiday soiree.

"Everyone is coming," Suraya reports. "Zavala got Saladin on board. Now all we have to do is make sure he and Shaxx play nice."

"Sounds like a family Dawning to me," Marc muses wryly. "It's never a family affair without someone at odds."

"I mean, ours were always pretty tame."

"Yes, dear, because we are a statistical outlier. And a smaller unit. You never got to experience the family gatherings Devrim's mum had. Someone was always out fighting in the garden, even in a blizzard." He laughs. "Hopefully it won’t come to that, though it’s okay to be a little nervous about it."

She thinks on it, munching through a few more bites of her taco. "Honestly?" The look on her face conveys her own surprise, "Crazy as it sounds - for me, anyway - I'm not."

"And here I was worried you'd be embarrassed about me doting on your work family," He smiles all the same, teasing. "Guess I'll have to step up my game. I just wish your father could be here."

"I know," She agrees, trying not to let the mood fall flat. "Zavala tried. And you know him, he's not the kind to do anything in half measures."

"That's for sure." Marc claps his hands, holding them in front of his face lest she see his smile. "Okay. No moping. Zavala said the shop he'd picked out some sweaters from is near here, and if his taste in wool is anything to go by, I'm going to need to do some shopping, too."

"Sweaters?"

"For the contest. He said he didn't have time to make you one, and that you'd want some nice things to wear for the holiday anyway." He elbows her. "You really lucked out with him, you know."

Suraya rolls her eyes promptly. "Shouldn't you be saying he's the lucky one?"

Marc hums, but pats her arm. "Oh, Suraya, he knows."

"You're sure."

"It's taken care of." Zavala meets his eyes through the screen in front of him. "You'll be covered for the last week of the Dawning. Everyone knows not to speak to Suraya about it, and I've kept the Guardians in the dark on the matter."

Devrim's forehead crinkles when his eyebrows knit closer. "I thought it from the day of the get together through the end of the celebration? Did I miss something?"

"I didn't think it would be fair to usher you home and then force you to host right away. I hadn't told Marc, that was the only piece I was not sure I'd be able to make happen."

"I appreciate it, Commander." His eyes are softer than usual. He clears his throat. "More than you know. This is going to be quite the holiday." He smirks, though it's lessened by the gratefulness in his gaze. "Marc has bought at least four cases of champagne since last we spoke. His letter was especially manic."

"Well, hopefully for good reason," Zavala trails off. Devrim hums, knowingly. Marc didn’t give him enough credit. He knew some things about some things.

"You've already gotten her to agree to the hard question." Zavala frowns. "She's there, isn't she?" Devrim fixes him with a confident, intent gaze through the screen. "This one is merely a formality, Zavala. She won't refuse you."

"I hope you're right."

"That's the nerves talking." Devrim crosses his arms, looks away for a moment, pensive. "When I asked Marc, I swore my mind went blank. I had a speech, you see, and it didn't matter how many times I'd practiced. It's a big moment." Zavala swallows hard, well aware. "But, you'll look up at her and none of it will matter." Devrim's cold-water eyes brighten. "There's no perfect proposal. It won't all go to plan. The best advice I can give you is to go with your gut."

"You don't think it'll overwhelm her?"

"It will. You'll likely put her to tears," Devrim nods, unable to help the optimistic twist to his lips, "But she won't say no." He pauses. "That won't stop you from worrying, I'm sure. I was a wreck, too."

Zavala can't help but agree. "I don't think I know how not to worry."

"We'll be drinking champagne and celebrating before you know it." An explosion somewhere off in the distance makes the feed shake and fuzz in static. "That sounds like my cue."

"It would seem so. We'll talk soon."

"We will. And, ah, don't... tell Marc yet, about those extra days. Suraya isn't the only one who could stand to be surprised."

"Understood." Zavala taps the end toggle.

Marc waves the bag in front of her face. "He literally picked out everything you'd like so you didn't have to browse. If that's not love, Suraya-"

"I know," She looks down into the second bag, the one she's carrying. The snow-white sweater on top has a smattering of tinsel-like silver woven throughout the bottom half. "He gets me," She tells him.

"Yeah, clearly. And he called them back to make sure I got this scarf." Marc runs his free hand down the front of it. "It's a really nice scarf."

"Alpaca is amazing, right? I got him some skeins of yarn from a place that raises their own herd of 'em so he can make us a blanket." She reaches out and touches the end. "Oh, wait. Not alpaca. That's cashmere. Fancier than alpaca and really, really soft."

Marc smirks. "You're so knowledgeable."

"He's very… informative?" She waves the word away. "Easy to listen to." She shrugs. "That's all it is."

"So," He loops his arm with hers. "Is he it?"

"It?" She pulls a face. "What does that mean?"

"You know." He smirks. "The one."

She looks away. "I-not all Guardians are into that," She admits, tone dipping lower.

They come into the holiday market once more and Marc stops, their entwined arms keeping her with him. "Huh. I don't know enough about Guardian culture. Have you talked about it?"

"Not really. We're," She taps her foot and whether it's from nervousness or impatience to get past the conversation, Marc isn't sure. "We just work well together. Simple as that. I'm obviously not going to live as long, but he says he doesn't care about. He wants to be with me as long as he can be and I believe him." She holds her father's gaze. "It's enough."

"Still, I mean, he could ask you. Then what?"

She rolls her eyes. "If he ever asks, I'll let you and Eva fight to the death over stationary and color schemes," She deadpans, tugging his arm. It's as close to a yes as she'll give him. "Can we please get moving?

Marc ducks his head to hide his grin. There won't be much arguing about stationary. Traditionally the bride's family makes the call, but Marc supposes he'll consider Eva's opinion as a courtesy.

Everyone is gathered in the Hangar. Amanda is literally dragging some Warlock in by the arm, one she knows from the very unofficial SRL league that's started up since the war. At no point - according to what Hawthorne's heard - has this "contest" ever had reasonably fair judging. Amanda brings in anyone she can find to judge the upper echelon's holiday sweater choices.

Suraya slips in late, managing to creep around Amanda to sit on a sparrow frame that's unoccupied near her workspace. It's as close as she'll get to one of those death traps without the fate of humanity at stake. Her shopping, set beside her on the ground, shimmers away. She barely catches the culprit, but manages to murmur a kind word of gratitude before meeting Zavala's gaze across the open space. His gaze dips for just a second, refocusing on her face a blink later.

His Ghost appears beside her for a moment once more, quick, like a dragonfly. Her shell spins, nearly silent.

"He says you look good."

Suraya hums. "Thanks. I'd say the same for him but I can't even see his sweater for everyone crowded in front of him."

The white-shelled droid chitters with a small laugh. "He planned it that way," She says, positioned just beside her partner's significant other's ear. The Shipwright prattles on, judging everyone herself, in addition to those she's rustled up to help her. "He'll ask me next if you found everything shopping."

"I did," Suraya whispers back. "New Monarchy charged me five times market value for Hideo's secret santa present. That was the bottle you transmatted."

Zavala's Ghost scoffs. "That's ridiculous. The Executor will only dump it out-"

"I had them wrap it and confirm the seal before I took it out of the store. I figured I'd try. Even if it's going to blow up in my face."

She hums, pensive. "If nothing else, he'll appreciate your attempt." The Ghost isn't referring to the Executor.

"Yeah. The hatchet will probably never get buried, and that's fine, I don't think he particularly deserves it." She crosses her arms and the Ghost rests on her shoulder, delicate, tentative. "But, maybe we can survive the rest of the winter without warfare at the roundtable."

"I think it'll last for as long as the wine does," She drones, "But you've always surpassed expectations."

Suraya covers the laugh with her hand. "Have I? I think I've come in with the bar set so low-"

"Nonsense." She clicks in a synthesized tone that conveys her annoyance. "You don't give yourself enough credit."

"I think you're biased," Hawthorne states, soft and even.

"And I think I've told you that I've tried very hard to think of every reason why my Guardian shouldn't be with you," She hisses, irritated. It fades quickly. The little bot has had plenty of experience with this; Both her charge and his intended are more similar than they realize. "Why you aren't good enough. And I can't."

They fall silent, watching Amanda fuss over Jalaal's very monotone and very personalized holiday threads. Figures he'd somehow win. They'll never hear the end of it, that's for sure. He'll be asking Eva for depressing decorations in black and gray next.

Barely audible, the Ghost whispers, "No one knows him like I do."

Like clockwork that blue gaze falls over them. Though there's no smile, the spark in those luminous eyes is obvious. Something about the two of them finding common ground, even if it's just over him (it isn't) brings him joy.

Hoarsely, Suraya replies, "I know."

The Ghost shivers. "But I could say the same for you," She imparts, honest. Where many Ghosts seem cute or shy by nature, Zavala's is regal and confident, a counterbalance for the hidden doubt and anxiety lurking beneath the Commander’s stoic facade. "I'm grateful."

"Me, too."

Back to Main Fic Post

#destiny fanfiction #the dawning #commander zavala #suraya hawthorne #devrim kay #destiny marc #devrim x marc #zavala x hawthorne #destinydawningfanfic #destiny dawning #next installment will be on tuesday #it will be the beginning of snowed in/only one bed #the tropiest of winter tropes

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dazeyrains2 · 5 years

Text

DECEPTION - A Multi Chapter, Hayffie fic - Prompt...POISON

Thanks @ellanainthetardis for the prompt.

....

DECEPTION PT1

....

Pt1 of Deception

Today was Thursday and Thursday's were quickly becoming Effies favourite day of the whole week in district 13.

Thursday's were when Coin held their weekly update meetings about Katniss and the war.

And Thurdays was also a day when they were allowed coffee!.

Astriss arrived a little later than usual with a full tray of steaming hot mugs and Effie couldn't stop the beam spreading across her face.

Whatever Coin was babbling on about did not matter to Effie for the next 10 minutes, because she would be holding a steaming mug of coffee between her hands and smelling the bitter sweet aroma of the black liquid and nothing was going to stop her from enjoying it.

"Thank you Astriss, you may serve" Coin six passively, waving at the girl with the tray.

Astriss was also quickly becoming Effies new favourite person.

Haymitch reached for a mug but Astriss batted his hand away...

"Not that one, that's for miss Trinket" The girl looked at Effie and winked "Double shot, just how you like it"

Coin cringed at the delightful squeal that came out of Effies throat.

"Oh Astriss, you are a pet!"

Haymitch grumbled something irrelevant and just took another mug.

"How come she gets two shots" he tutted and Effie jutted her bottom lip out towards him sarcastically

"Because Miss Trinket asked. And besides...she gives good makeup tips...tit for tat" she winked again

"Enough, Astriss" Coin begged "That will be all"

The girl left with a grin and a wave from Effie.

"Oh she's delightful" Effie trilled

Haymitch sipped his coffee and it tasted weak."Yeah, sure. Delightful indeed"

...

That evening in the cafeteria, Effie invited Astriss to join her and Katniss at their table for dinner.

"I don't think the woman dishing out this slop likes me very much" Effie grumbled over her tray of soggy vegetables and questionable meat. Katniss and Astriss peered over towards the serving station.

Effie had a point. If looks could kill. The woman behind the counter was throwing daggers at Effie almost too obviously.

"Has anything happened between you?" Katniss asked, knowing full well that Effie possibly brought it on herself, complaining about the food or something, but Effie shook her head.

"I know what you're thinking Katniss, but I've done nothing to offend that woman, just merely exist it seems"

Astriss lay her hand over Effies

"Hey, some of the people down here just haven't been able to accept the Captiol refugees yet" she sympathised "But if they want to live bitterly, then let them. You're a kind and generous person, Effie. They'll come to know it soon enough"

Effie smiled bright but her smile soon faded when she noticed the difference on her plate as to what was on Katniss's and Astriss's

"Look at that" Effie huffed, picking up a rather unusual looking slice of the rabbit meat that was on her plate. "Pure fat! And those vegetables look like they were drowned twice over..."

"Maybe she's just having a bad day and wants someone to take it out on?" Katniss suggested, but Effie wasn't bought.

"No, Katniss." Effie disagreed tiresomely "She's been treating me this way since I arrived here. Always taking my plate out of my hands and wandering off, only to return with what can only be described as leftovers fit for a mutt. I put up with it because I'm hungry, but heaven knows where shes getting my food from or what shes doing to it"

Astriss grabbed Effies plate suddenly and slid it towards herself "You're right Effie, this is disgusting and this is uncalled for, leave it with me"

Before Effie or Katniss could protest, Astriss was up and marching over to the counter to confront the woman.

The ladies couldn't hear what was said, but Astriss looked stern and the woman looked sheepish.

In less than a few more seconds Astriss had returned with a brand new plate full of healthy looking meat and fresh vegetables

"She won't be bothering you again Effie" Astriss beamed brightly "Not whilst I'm around"

Fair to say, Effie had just found her new best friend.

....

At dinner the next evening, the woman behind the counter barely made eye contact with Effie but Effies plate was returned to her bursting with fresh vegetables and dumplings.

On returning to her table, Effie couldn't help but feel suspicious.

"Saved you ladies some nice hot coffee!" Astriss smiled, sliding Effie and Katniss a cup each.

"Thanks Astriss" Katniss grinned but Effie was distracted by her thoughts

"She's smirking at me" Effie said, peering over her shoulder at the woman still serving the food.

"Effie, she's just smiling" Katniss assured "Maybe she's trying to make amends"

"What exactly did you say to her Astriss" Effie asked curiously

"I told her that if it wasn't for you slipping those golden tokens into the arena, then there never would have been an alliance with Finnick Odair, and Katniss and Peeta may not have trusted him and possibly not survived." Astriss stated proudly "I told her that the real hero here was you, no offence Katniss, and that she better start showing you some respect or I'd notify Coin of her behaviour"

Katniss and Effie shared a look but then Effie was beaming...

Astriss kind of reminded Effie of Katniss in some ways. Fearless, honest, brave and loyal.

"You're a good person Astriss" Effie smiled

Katniss agreed "Yeah, good job you're here"

...

Later that evening, just before she settled down to bed, Effie felt a whirring in her stomach and the room felt particularly warm that night.

She downed a glass of water, took off all of her clothes and crawled into bed, hoping the feeling would shift by morning.

The next morning, she felt no better but Coin had called an early 2nd meeting to discuss an urgent propo for Katniss, but Effie wasnt happy about it because it was still too soon, the girl wasn't ready. So, Effie had to be sharp and focused today and stand her ground.

She arrived late after spending the first part of the morning with her head over the toilet, but her excuses fell flat. Coin didn't strike anyone as a sympathetic soul.

"If you're under the weather, Miss Trinket, I suggest you sit this meeting out?" Coin challenged, but Effie was having none of it.

"No, no. I'm quite alright...go ahead"

But as Coin proceeded, Haymitch leant a little closer in to Effie and gave her a nudge.

"You sure you're ok?, I can fill you in later, you look a little pale?"

"That damn food server in the canteen" she seethed quietly "She's fed me rotten meat again, I just know it"

"Food poisoning?"

"I think so" Effie nodded "But I got the worst out this morning"

Haymitch turned his nose up at the thought.

"Vomiting, Haymitch" She assured "Not the other way yet...although, not too far off" The face he pulled as she rubbed her stomach was totally worth it. She chuckled at his reaction and told him she was kidding... but she wasnt kidding. Her insides felt alien.

"Just...drink plenty of water, ok" he suggested and Effie smirked curiously. Haymitch had never been one to care before... Ever!

"Ok" she nodded, and poured herself a glass.

As the meeting went on, the temperature in the room seemed to sky rocket. Effie could feel beads of perspiration running down the back of her neck.

"Look, just a few more weeks" Effie tried to argue "let's get her comfortable with that damn camera first, if you throw her in now, it'll be a disaster"

Haymitch had agreed with her, thankfully, but between the two of them and Coin and Plutarch, it was still two agaisnt two.

Plutarch tried to reason...

"Well, let's film rehearsal? She doesn't need to know the cameras are rolling, we might capture something good?"

"And if she figures it out-" Haymtich began until Effie interrupted

"Which she will! She will lose more trust in you than ever..." The room suddenly started spinning but Effie couldn't bow out now. "Look, just give her time"

"WE DONT HAVE TIME, TRINKET" Coin bellowed suddenly it was like a hammer had been smashed into Effies skull.

"Ouch! Why are you yelling!?"

Conversation erupted around the table but the voices seemed to become raised causing Effie to cover her ears.

Everything sounded weird and everyone seemed to be yelling now.

She pleaded one more time "Please stop yelling"

Confused eyes crossed the table to where she sat

"Stop moving, why are you all moving..." effie continued, trying to focus. The room felt like it was spinning

Haymitch reached out towards her, grabbing her wrist

"Effie, we're all sat down...no ones moving, no ones yelling...What's going on with you?"

Effie put her head in her hands for a moment, but as she tried to focus again, Haymitch noticed the blood

"Jesus ef! Your nose!"

Effie looked into her hands and saw a pool of sticky red liquid, she pressed her fingers above her upper lip and felt the blood running from her nose.

"Get her a tissue!" Coin ordered. Plutarch grabbed a box on the side and ran around the table to join Haymitch.

Hands were holding her arms for comfort but she didn't know who's they were as the room began to spin even more.

"I need to stand" she whimpered but Haymtich strongly protested

"I need to get out, it's too hot in here..." she begged

Her speech was slurred, Haymitch ordered one of the guards to fetch a doctor.

"Ok, let's get you up" He soothed "I'll walk out with you" But as Haymitch lifted her to her feet, Effies knees buckled immediately and she fell into his arms.

"Miss Trinket? What's happening?" Coin asked, looking to Haymitch for answers but he was just as clueless.

She was becoming a dead weight so Haymitch lay Effie down gently on the floor instead and whipped his sweater off to create a pillow for her head. That's when she started coughing.

"Turn her on her side!" Coin suggested

But as he did, her throat gargled painfully and she began to cough up blood. Not just a little...a lot...a whole lot. It started pouring out of her mouth.

"Effie!? Effie?!" Haymitch panicked now. He saw her eyes starting to roll into the back of her head "Stay with me, Ef. Come on, Breathe in! Breathe!"

Haymitch didn't know what to do or what to say, all he knew was that this doctor better hurry because this was no food poisoning or stomach bug, this was something else. Somthing far more sinister.

To be continued...

*what's going on with Effie!?? Will she be ok??? Find out soon... xx

#hayffie #haymitch x effie #effie trinket #haymitch abernathy #katniss everdeen #district 13 #during mj #poison

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crowkingwrites · 6 years

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Water Flows Like Love Does

Pairing: Loki X Reader

Requests: Request: Hi! Can I request a Loki x reader fic where she has feelings for him but he has his eye on someone else so he hasn't noticed her? Maybe she's pretty average looking? Not sure how specific I'm supposed to be. 👀 But I'm a huge fan of slow-burn, angst with a happy ending, and smuuuut. LOL Also, I love your writing! (Anon) & Loki x Reader where it’s proficiency for him to meet her as the love of his life ? (Anon)

Author’s Notes: I really ran away with this one. Geez. One thing I forgot was the smut. I was so involved in telling this story that i just forgot. Oops.

Words: 6366 / Warnings: None (Ao3 Link)

(More Loki One Shots and Series Here)

Water flows through a fountain constantly. It will keep flowing and flowing until the fountain’s life itself ends. You stared at it and wondered if love worked the same way. Your head tilted slowly as the water hit the pool of the fountain. You could give your love to a person and the love would keep flowing and changing, but the supply was still there. Love could never run out. Love keeps flowing.

“Y/N!” snapped your professor. Your head sharply turned back to him. You weren’t the best student in your class. It wasn’t that you were stupid. Your mind just wandered to other things like fantastic worlds or handsome boys. Your chair wobbled as you sat straight up before him. Another girl in your class giggled at your expense. Her long, blonde hair was too perfect, but you knew better. Sigyn charmed herself with vanity spells. You didn’t change your appearance for anything or anyone, but looking at some of the other girls in your sorcery class made you think about it.

Before the professor could lecture you on focusing in class, Loki walked in late as usual. He bowed his head and apologized.

“My mother required my assistance. Again, I apologize, Mephistopheles.” Loki took his seat right behind Sigyn. His face softened when he looked at her, and your face softened when you looked at him. His black hair was slicked back and his green cowl covered his neck. Everyone was dressed warmer for the colder weather. You tugged at your sweater sleeves. Sweater yarn started to grow into and around your hands creating fingerless gloves.

Mephistopheles continued with class. He gestured to the plants in the royal courtyard. Identifying each one and its purpose in magic. Plants and herbs were useful in your own home. Your mother made a lovely place for herself as Queen Frigga’s medicine woman. Your home was filled with dried herbs and flowers all over the place. You knew this class like the back of your hand.

You let your mind wander back to the fountain. How love flowed evenly and constantly through it. You heard Loki’s voice asking a question. You started to wonder if you could love Loki like that, and if he could love you back in the same way.

Mephistopheles ended class early due to the beautifully cold weather, but your homework was to study for your next exam which was in two days.

You walked through the palace and towards your mother’s workplace. She often enjoyed having you for lunch. You watched Sigyn and her close friends walk together in the direction of leaving the palace. “Y/N!” she cheerfully said. You turned your head to see her coming up to you. You felt your stomach drop. You wanted to hide. Her pretty heels clicked up to you. Her perfect blonde hair bounced. “Some friends and I were taking a lunch at the new sweets shop. Would you like to come?”

Her invitation sounded so sweet. You wanted to follow her, but remembered your mother.

“Thank you, but I usually have lunch with my mother,” you told her.

“Oh, that’s too bad. Next time then,” she waved and left with her group of friends. Sigyn giggled in class at your expense, yet she asked you to lunch? You weren’t so sure of people your own age.

Your other’s workplace looked more like a greenhouse than a workspace. Dirt and water decorated the floor like marble. Several tables held different families of flowers and plants. Each had their own temperature and watering schedules. The glass roof was sprinkled with colorful leaves. In the furthest corner, your mother set out two bowls of soup with sandwiches.

“Hello pumpkin,” she greeted you. You jumped into your stool. Steam rose from the vegetable soup your father made for both of you. You could smell the spices and seasoned potatoes. Digging right in, your mouth was immediately satisfied with the taste. The sandwich bread just crunched under the pressure of your fingers. It was filled with meat and a sauce your father made from home.

“How’s your day?” you asked your mother in-between bites. She smiled.

“Thor and his friends came in here with a couple of knicks and cuts. He asked about you.”

You knew where this was going. “Mom—

“Nothing embarrassing. Just what you were studying. He wanted to know what you’ll do after school.”

“He was just being nice, Mother,” you said. “Thor is really, really nice.” She touched your arm and bit her lip.

“Are you sure?”

You pulled your hand away. “Yes, I’m sure.” A small chuckle left your mouth. “No one has ever been interested in me. I don’t expect my first boyfriend to be a royal prince, especially not Thor.” Your mind flashed to Loki. Your heart sank. He never really noticed you, has he? Why would he? Sigyn was perfect. They weren’t dating.

That’s what you told yourself. They were only close friends. That flame of hope ignited once again before you left the palace for the day. Studying for the exam should be a cinch. You grew up in a house where your first words were “rose”, “thyme”, and “green”. You let your mind wander once more.

This time it was you and the Prince Loki in the royal ballroom. He smiled down at you, holding you oh-so-carefully like you were made of glass. He dared not break you. Both of you moved like water across the floor. You glided and spilled your love over each other. Loki bent down to your ear.

“You look lovely tonight.”

Your cheeks warmed at his compliment. He led you across the ballroom floor again, only to guide you outdoors to the balcony. The stars above your heads twinkled down and showed off to you. Asgard’s sky was different from other realms. Inky blues covered most of it, but every now and again you’d see a planet or a star shooting across.

“I have something for you,” Loki gently told you. He handed you a scroll with a location of a star. You looked up to the sky and saw it twinkling.

“A star?”

“It’s named after you. It was discovered recently, so I had them name it after you.” You heard three sharp knocks on your door, pulling you away from the sweet moment.

“Pumpkin? I’ve called you down to dinner twice.” Your father leaned against the door looking more concerned than cheerful.

“Sorry,” you muttered. Your parents were just as annoyed with your daydreaming as much as your teachers were. The exam wasn’t too difficult. You were asked to identify plants and flowers and then explain what they could be used for. When you were handed back your exam, you weren’t surprised. Flying colors all the way.

“Y/N?” you looked up to see Sigyn standing in front of you. You quietly sat with a book inside the royal library, but carefully put it down when she called your attention.

“Hello,” you greeted her.

“Hello, I’m sorry. I should’ve said that first.” Sigyn bit her lip. “I didn’t do well on the last exam we did. I know herbology is something you grew up on and you’re really good at. I was wondering—

“If I could tutor you?” you finished her sentence, raising your eyebrow. Sigyn clapped.

“Yes! Exactly!” “I don’t know. I’m not so sur—

“Please? I’ll be a good student,” she explained. “I’ll even help you with your hair! I know a good trick or two to get really healthy hair.” You held up your hand.

“You don’t have to do anything. I’m fine.”

“Is this about when I laughed at you in class?” she asked. “I’m really sorry about that. I really need your help. Please?” You sighed. Perhaps, Sigyn wasn’t as bad as you originally thought. No one who learned sorcery in Asgard was terribly bad. You shook hands with Sigyn and your tutoring sessions started.

You’d both meet in the library right after Herbology class to go over anything Sigyn had trouble on. At first, Sigyn felt embarrassed with everything she struggled with. Asking good questions wasn’t helping her until you told her, ‘It’s okay to ask stupid questions. It’s not stupid if you don’t know.’ After a few more sessions, Sigyn got more confident.

“So we don’t mix these two because that will create poison,” Sigyn said.

“Yes, but you can put them together along with sage.”

Sigyn shook her head. “This is really hard to memorize. Oh, hi Loki!” Before you stood the younger prince of Asgard who was having a hard time speaking aloud.

“H-hello. Hello. I’ve seen you both here every couple of days. I was wondering if I may join you?” His voice was so comforting to hear, but before you lost yourself in it, Sigyn turned to you.

“What do you think? Is this a no boys allowed club?” Her cheeky smile and gorgeous eyes were hard to say no to.

“You can join us if you’d like,” you nodded. Your heart fluttered when he sat down in the chair across from you, but next to Sigyn. He’s never been this close before.

“Thank you,” Loki opened his herbology book and notes. “I’ve been struggling too. Mephistopheles is a hard one.”

“You struggle too? But you’re so smart!” Sigyn cheered him on. Loki’s cheeks flushed bit, but then he turned to you.

“He told me that you were the only one to ace it. Everyone else either did below average or failed.” Your cheeks flushed more. This was the most he had spoken to you ever, and it was the biggest compliment.

“Thank you?” you replied. Loki nodded, and then started your tri-tutoring group. All of you met each time after class in the library. With Loki there, both of your ‘students’ excelled in the class. You taught them new things on top of what they were studying. You even taught them more about forbidden topics: such as poisons and hexes using plants.

“That makes poison?”

“It’s Midgardian, but yes, that makes poison,” you smiled. Loki and Sigyn looked at each other and then you.

“I don’t know why you aren’t the teacher,” Loki smiled. “This is so much more fun when you explain it like this.” You felt your face flush once more in front of Loki.

“Thank-thank you,” you said. You felt your face grow white at the realization that Sigyn had been watching you intently this entire time. “We’re done for today. I have to rush home to feed Audrey.”

“Audrey? You have a sister?” Sigyn asked.

“Not exactly. Audrey is a monstrous plant that feeds on adult ravens, but we were born around the same time, so I guess you can say she’s my sister.” Sigyn and Loki looked at you with both confusion and admiration at the same time. You waved them off and went on your way.

That evening, your father had a surprise for you. All of your things were packed up and ready to move. Both of your parents decided it was time for you to be part of the Asgardian court to help you make meaningful connections and to mature. The rest of your week was moving and settling into your own castle room which was in Frigga’s wing. She was more than happy to have a new neighbor and one that was a sorceress-in-training.

“Please, let me know if there’s anything I can do to make you feel comfortable,” she smiled down at you.

“Thank you,” you nodded. “You’ve been so welcoming. Thank you.” The Queen placed her hand on your shoulder.

“Your mother brings nothing but healing and joy to Asgard. I know you’ll do the same.”

“The tutoring session!” you gasped at your realization.

“I’ve excused you from classes, is everything alright?”

“No, this isn’t a class. I’m helping Loki and Sigyn. I’m sorry! I have to go!” You rushed yourself towards the royal library to find a very sour Loki reading over notes and an absent Sigyn.

“Where’s—

“She’s not coming,” Loki bit his thumnbnail. “She won’t be coming anymore.”

“What? Why? Did I—

“You did nothing wrong,” Loki snarled. Clearly, something happened in the week you were gone. You set down your books carefully while watching Loki’s face turn from sour to soft. A sigh left his mouth. “I wanted to court her desperately. It seems that she didn’t feel the same.”

“She rejected you?”

“Yes,” Loki said sharply. His thumbnail was bitten off. You looked around to see if Sigyn was secretly watching, but saw no signs of her. You sat down slowly in front of the tested Loki.

“Do you want me to tutor you or—

Loki narrowed his eyes. “What do you think?” His nostrils flaring. Your eyes darted back and forth.

“I don’t know what to think. That’s why I asked you.” Both sat there awkwardly for a moment until Loki broke the silence.

“You’re right,” he agreed, chuckling to himself. “I’m being difficult. I hope we can continue.” You nodded along, and went ahead tutoring Loki on this week’s lesson. In turn, Loki traded you tips and hints of how to not get lost in Asgard and who not to piss off. Loki pointed down a hallway. His wrist flicked to the left.

“That’s where my room is.”

“Why are you telling me where your room is? I asked you where I could make friends?” you cocked your brow. Loki nodded.

“And I told you. Down there, last door on the left.” Loki started down the hallway. “I spend a lot of time in there. Come visit me sometime.” The rest of the summer Loki and you met up to trade knowledge. You would engage him into learning more about his mother’s garden, and he would talk to you of who to be friends with in court.

“What of Fandral? He seems very charming,” you commented to Loki as both of you entered the throne room. Loki touched your arm and held on gently. His mouth went next to your ear.

“Fandral isn’t friends with girls. Not girls like you,” he commented. You felt a pang of hurt inside your stomach. Being friends with Loki for this long had been wonderful, but you still held that hope inside that he would notice you some way. It still wasn’t the case. You still weren’t pretty enough to be noticed or have friends, you guessed. You looked down and bit your lip, letting your mind wander until a snap broke you out.

“Huh?”

“You’re doing it again. The wandering,” Loki pointed out. “Are you alright?” “What you said about Fandral—

“He messes around with girls and does not care to return the feelings. There’s no such thing as a good girl being friends with Fandral. The last thing you want to give him is your time and your love.” Loki wasn’t commenting on your looks. He was warning you.

A loud boom echoed the room, and you faced your King. Odin sat on his throne while he spoke on the peace in Asgard. How he wanted to move forward, what the kingdom was doing science-wise, and to announce the Harvest Festival was well under way in planning. The annual celebration was something you looked forward to every year. You spoke about your excitement in Loki’s chambers.

“Do you think they’ll have sugar pumpkins soon? Maybe I can get one from Stanis tomorrow morning?”

“A sugar pumpkin?” Loki inquired.

“To make pie.” A glint caught your eye. Loki’s chambers were covered in different books, scientific tools, and art. His bedroom was a museum of his head. A telescope was aimed through his window. Bookshelves were netly organized with different texts ranging from ancient Asgardian history to passionate folktales of love to Midgardian war strategies. Browns and blacks decorated the mischievous boy’s walls and floor.

You had looked through most books and asked him about his favorite art, but something lay next to his bed. It was the size of an elongated water glass, but the glass moved. Three opals lay at the bottom of the glass, their color constantly changing from red to purple to violet to maroon. The glassy water flowed continuously in the magical glass. The water reflected the colors of the opals. You heard another snap.

“Sorry,” you apologized. You lowered your own hand, finding yourself closer to the beautiful object than you thought you were. Your eyes snapped back to the magical water. “What is that? I’ve never seen it before.”

“Good timing too, it’s never done this before,” Loki invited you to sit next to him on his bed while both of you watched the deep red colors interchange. “Five years ago, I became fascinated with oracles and prophecies. How could people predict the future without science and facts? What became of those heroes that were prophesized? Odin wasn’t too happy with my new interest, but my mother was.

“She took me back to her homeland during a festival of sorts. The festival doesn’t matter. I remember we entered a sacred tent. In the center was a real oracle. She told me that she waited for me, the God of Mischief. She knew what I wanted, and this this to me in a box. I told her I wanted my own prophecy, and she pointed to the box. ‘There’s your prophecy. Once revealed, your heart will know.’ The oracle believed I was too smart for riddles and words. So, she gifted me a puzzle.”

“A puzzle prophecy?” You wanted to run your fingers through the flowing water so terribly. It felt like an itch. “So what kind of prophecy is it?”

“A romantic one. After looking over the words the oracle told me. ‘Once revealed, the heart will know.’ I believe once I crack the puzzle I will know who I’m supposed to be with.” A thought occurred to you.

“Sigyn. That’s why you passionately pursued her, didn’t you?”

Loki slowly nodded. A long exhale escaped his mouth into the air. “At the time, I thought I had it. Whenever I dreamed about her, thought about her, the water and opals turned green. Green is notoriously my color, so I thought she belonged to me.”

“What have you learned so far?”

Loki took the object in his hands. The glass congealed in his hands. The water still swirled, but it was contained.

“It studies my dreams. It knows my feelings, so the magic is empathic. It knows my relationship with others. I thought of my mother several times in front of it as a control. The water turned yellow and bright. Happiness. I feel nothing but happiness around her. I thought of Thor and it gave me a mixture between reds and yellows. Joy, but anger.”

“And me?”

Both of you looked at the object again. The same purples and deep reds turned over and over again. Loki shook his head.

“I-I don’t know. I thought red meant anger, but I have no anger towards you.”

The harvest festival had other realms gathering towards Asgard. Soon, Asgard was filled with visitors from other realms. Each sharing their harvest and traditions with the other. You always thought that Odin had this peaceful vision of all cultures coming together to celebrate each other. After being Loki’s closest friend for months, you’ve come to learn the politics of it all.

You wore a prettier gown than usual, but nothing too fancy as you glided into the ballroom packed with nobles and royalty alike. Loki wore a watered down version of his personal armor. A pair of smaller golden horns decorated his black-haired head. Your arm was in his as usual.

“Ah, the ambassador from Svartalfheim is walking towards us,” you warned Loki. His head snapped forward and rolled his eyes.

“I can’t stand him. Stop me from doing something rash.” Loki and you stepped forward to meet with the Dark Elf/Asgardian hybrid. His ears were shaped like any dark elf. His eyes were charcoal like the ashes of a dead fire. His body wasn’t that of a warrior, but more a comfortably wealthy politician that spend his earnings on clothing his rotund body than helping the common people.

“My lord, my lady,” he greeted.

“Oh, I must apologize, but—

Loki stopped you from apologizing with a squeeze of your arm. He opened his mouth. “Good evening, Arn. How can I help you?”

“My young lord, I heard you were gifted with sorcery. Tell me, do you find it useful?”

“I do,” Loki answered. “Why?”

“How can you fight with it? It’s only magic. A few words here, a pretty hand action there, and then—

Suddenly, Arn’s body fell to the ground like someone had ripped carpet from under him. He rolled on his back, struggling to get up. You giggled while Loki took you both away from the scene. Your pretty dress swayed in his direction and he accidently stepped on it.

“I’m so sorry! Your dress—

“It’s fine,” you looked down to see not much damage, only dirt. When you looked back up, Loki’s face was in close proximity to yours. The warmth of his breath covered your cheeks. All of your fantasies were now reality. Loki and you were now alone in the palace at night and his attention was now on you.

Without much thinking, your hands wrapped around his neck and placed your lips on his. He was warm. It was different than you thought it would be. You didn’t hear fireworks or feel space twisting inside your stomach. He was just warm. Loki’s hands pushed you back by your arms. His face was in shock.

“Why did you do that?” he asked you. “Y/N, why did you do that?”

“You must’ve known, right?” the words spilled out. Just like water. They exploded out of you like a geyser. “How I looked at you, why I helped you, why I always take your arm, why I’m always around you. You must have known. You’re not stupid. You know how I feel about you.”

Loki shook his head. “No, I-I don’t. I-what?” The realization hit you before he could say it. He never once noticed it. He never once cared enough for you to see how obvious it was. Tears welled up in your eyes. You thought it was sadness at first, but it was anger that made you push Loki away from you. It was anger that made you sprint away from the palace and into the festival grounds. It was anger that made you collide with another body.

“I’m sorry!” You tried to cover up your crying face. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to— “Y/N?” Thor stopped you. A cheerful smile faded from his face. “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Words did not flow anymore. They were stuck in the back of your throat like an itch.

“I don’t wish to talk about it.” You wiped a hand across your eyes, smearing your eye makeup.

“I understand,” Thor offered you a hand and a drink.

“Wait, is this?”

“It is,” Thor nodded and put the drink in your hand. “Sometimes it’s okay to forget and enjoy good company.” You smiled at his kindness. Sometimes, you wished your heart swelled for the other brother. Thor had always been kind to you. Why couldn’t Loki be the same?

You galloped and ran around with Thor and his friends for the evening. After a couple of drinks, your dress ripped due to an altercation with a foreigner. Sif, who was sound and more sober than you, stole clothes from a local merchant. You changed into more a more durable pair of pants and a tunic. A cloak from a different merchant covered you into the night.

Ale and wine warmed your belly while you felt all unrequited feelings for Loki fade away. Thor and Sif were closer to you than ever before. Thor smelled of ale and sweat, but Sif smelled like flowers. How a female warrior smelled like flowers? You had no idea. Fandral smiled at other girls while the whole lot of you found the palace again. You remember hanging onto Sif and laughing as both of you entered the empty throne room with everyone else.

The last thing you remember is Thor attempting to pick up Mjolnir. The next thing you remember is your parents looking down on you in one of Eir’s beds. You looked to the left and right of you. Everyone who partied with you last night nursed headaches and pains. You watched one of Fandral’s girls throw up into a basin two beds away from you.

“What in the Hel were you thinking?!” Your father yelled at you. The sunlight caused pain in your eyes. “We sent you to live in Asgard Palace to teach you values, make meaningful connections, and this is what you do?”

“Father, I am truly so sorry—

“No, sorry won’t cut it.”

“Odo, hush. You’re too cross,” your mother calmed your father. He shook his head.

“No, I will not have my daughter become a lady of night.”

“Father! Please! I wouldn’t. It was only one night!”

“That’s your aunt said to me. One night! Ha! What a joke that was! It’s never just one night. And it’s never going to happen again.”

“Odo, please—

“I don’t understand,” you said. “What do you mean?”

“We’re sending you away,” your father’s lips formed one firm line. “You’re going away to Vanaheim to a sanctuary for young girls. Asgard’s corruption can’t touch you there.” Your father ripped you away from everything you knew for the sake of your own purity. Away from Thor, Sif, and Fandral. Away from Frigga. Away from your home and everything you knew. Away from Loki.

You never had the chance to say goodbye. Your father gathered everything he could of yours and sent you off towards the sanctuary in Vanaheim. The ride was long and tiring, but once you arrived you were surprised to see who greeted you first.

“I know how you feel. There’s a lot of anger to be had,” Frigga placed her hands on your shoulders, letting them slide up and down your arms as comfort. “Do not be angry with your father. He loves you dearly.”

“I know, but I only made one mistake. Now, I’m here.”

“Do not think of this place as a punishment. Think of it as an opportunity. A place to grow, learn, and mature. I did all of education here when I was young. Sink into magic. Let knowledge be water, and you a sponge. Soak in it. Let it expand you.”

You took Frigga’s words to heart as your mind soaked in every subject you could get your hands on. Your teachers encouraged your mind to wander and explore rather than make you pay attention. You quickly made your own friends and relished any time you had with them whether it be enjoying wine or studying quietly with them.

One day, a close friend presented you with a letter. The envelope was green and gold. Loki. You quietly excused yourself while you read the letter privately in your own space.

Y/N,

It has been months since that night. I had thought you were actively avoiding my company until I heard of your fate from Thor. I was cross with my mother and your parents for a while until last week. My mother told me this place was better for you than Asgard. I suppose she is right. Still, I miss you terribly. My closest friend in an entirely different realm learning all kinds of magic and sorcery. I don’t know whether to feel jealousy or sadness. My mother gave me your address so I may write letters to you. I must admit this is the fourth letter I’ve written.

If you do not want our friendship, then I understand. I will write to you no longer. However, if there’s a chance I may save our kinship, please let me fix it.

Yours, Loki.

The letter shocked you. You hadn’t seen or heard from him, and now he wishes to rekindle the warm friendship you both shared. You wondered how to feel. Had you moved on from him? Or were the same feelings there? You had been so busy and productive, you had forgotten about him. Rekindling your friendship may not be a necessarily a bad thing.

Thus, began the letter exchanging. Loki was thrilled to hear back from you, so much so, that he sent a new book he was looking into about oracles. It was written by the same woman who gave him the contraption. It seems she was rather gifted by giving puzzles and items as prophecies rather than saying them. Through your first letters, both of you examined Loki’s magical water glass which it was appropriately named Juturna’s Glass.

You were so close to unlocking the puzzle one day in the library as you compared your notes to Loki’s letters until another letter was handed to you. It was accompanied by a box wrapped in gold and white.

Y/N,

I realize most of our letters are dedicated to the puzzle. I had almost forgotten your birthday! Today, I want to forget about the puzzle and present you with this gift. Your friendship to me means the world to me. It saddens me that I cannot spend time with someone I consider my equal, but I hope you enjoy the present.

The small, white box opened easily after you pulled the ribbon from it. Inside, lay three opals that twinkled at you. They were strung together in a beautiful necklace. A small gasp left your mouth. Your fingers brushed over the delicate thing. You knew money to Loki was nothing, but this present looked like a lot.

“That’s so beautiful!” Sayori commented.

“Thank you, Loki gave it to me for my birthday,” you told her. Sayori smiled.

“Oh, The Prince of Darkness has found his light.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you chuckled. A long-haired beauty turned around in her seat.

“It means he likes you, silly.”

“Sigyn!” you gasped. “Come on, you know more than anyone he never noticed me, especially next to you.” Sigyn shook her head.

“What friend gives another friend a necklace like that?”

The question played in your head for a day or two. You didn’t have time for your head to wander like usual. You and other young women were now being tested in front of the entire sanctuary. Everything from herbology to sorcery to prophetic powers, your sanctuary was known to turn out nothing but the best. Your parents greeted you after graduation with flowers and your first cloak. It was in your family colors. The red base had purple moons highlighted by golden threads.

You left Asgard a lost and broken teenager, but you returned with your head held high as a grown woman. Sigyn rode to your right. Over the years, her beauty had matured into something men would die for. She no longer needed glamour charms. She wore her own beauty. You still believed yourself to be plain, but after years spent in the sanctuary you learned to love yourself for your own beauty.

You waved and smiled at people you once knew, but your stomach flipped when you saw the palace.

“Hey!” Sigyn called out. You turned your head to see her devilish smile. “Last one there has to kiss Fandral?”

“You’re on.” You winked at her. You kicked your horse into gear as both of you sped through Asgard and into the palace. Your cloak whipped behind you as your white horse climbed the steps of the palace and finally finishing right before the throne room to present yourself to the King. You panted and sighed at the welcome sight of the throne room doors. Asgard’s history and beauty carved into them. You pushed the doors open and frowned at the sight of Sigyn already there.

“Teleportation, isn’t it wonderful?” she reached out to poke you.

“Cheater,” you smiled. Both of you heard laughter ahead of you. Sigyn and you expected to see Odin on his throne to welcome you back, but instead Loki stood before you both in full armor. His black hair was slicked back as usual, but he was a man now. His boyish parts gone and replaced with a leaner, taller version of himself. His green cape followed each elegant step he took. You felt your heart racing as your fingers touched the opals you still wore.

“Sigyn, it’s been a while,” Loki greeted her first. You felt another pang of jealousy as he hugged her.

“It’s good to see you too,” she smiled back.

“Welcome back,” he smiled at both of you. His hand reached out to yours. You let him take it as he kissed your fingers. Butterflies tickled your stomach as the pink reached your cheeks. “Both of you have been dearly missed. My father could not be here to greet you, so I wanted to do the job. Sigyn, I believe my mother and Eir would like to speak with you.”

“Eir? I thought she hated me,” she smiled. Loki shrugged.

“Time changes feelings,” Loki said, standing closer to you than her. “Go see her. She has an opportunity for you.”

“Well, how fancy.” Sigyn’s hair whipped around as she walked out of the throne room, leaving you and Loki alone.

“Hello,” he said to you as if he was waiting for a specific answer.

“Hello,” you said to him. “I don’t suppose I have an opportunity too?”

“Oh! Yes, you do. I helped, but I had hoped you would follow me first for old times’ sake.”

“Oh? Does this involve snakes?” you giggled. Loki laughed along with you. He offered you his arm.

“Not this time.” Loki led you inside the royal library where you had tutored him. Things were changed around and new furniture had replaced the old. You wanted to question Loki’s motives until you saw Juturna’s Glass except it was no longer a solid water vessel. The red and purple water created an illusion of a heart. The blue and red veins acted as if there was blood pumping the ‘heart’.

“Loki—

“I solved it,” Loki smiled. “I cracked the puzzle. I wanted to show you. I could not have done this without your hard work. Thank you.” A sadness settled in the pit of your stomach. If Loki had solved the prophetic puzzle that means he finally found who his heart truly belonged to. You gave Loki your best smile.

“I’m happy for you,” you told him. You took in a sharp breath to avoid sobbing. “I hope she’s wonderful and makes you happy.” Loki turned to you. His blue eyes looked into yours. It seemed like an eternity since you both had been this physically close.

“She is,” Loki whispered to you. He pointed back to the glassy water heart. “You’re smart, love. Look at it again. What’s missing?”

The glass heart had everything, but the solid vessel. The reds, blues, and purples were still bright as usual. It still flowed and pumped. You looked into the crevices and around the heart. Nothing looked missing until you remembered.

“Weren’t there jewels at the—

You touched the three opals on your neck. You remembered the three opals sitting at the bottom of the puzzle. The same three opals that rested happily on your chest.

“Loki?” You turned to him and gasped. He chuckled.

“You’re slowly understanding it? I thought you would’ve known,” Loki smiled.

“How long?” you asked. “I cracked it not long before your birthday. That was well over fifty years ago,” Loki smiled. “You and I were meant to be, Y/N. I was too young and stupid to understand what I had in front of me.”

“You’ve been in love with me for that long?!” you exclaimed. You went to push Loki, but before you could push him Loki grabbed your wrists and pulled you towards him. He closed in the space between both of you. His hands ran through your hair as his mouth moved against yours. You held his armor in your hands. It was the only thing that could keep you stable. You wanted to melt in his arms. When you finally separated, Loki could barely open his eyes. You could see the smile across his face.

He was finally yours.

Your new relationship became very known to the rest of the kingdom. Loki couldn’t stop showing you off to anyone and everyone. You started teaching a new class of students replacing three other teachers because well, you were always the better teacher either way.

“Lady Y/N?” a student asked, raising their hand properly. “What can you tell me about Juturna’s Glass?” You smiled fondly looking at the same glass heart that pumped violets and rubies.

“Love is like water. It flows continuously for those who love us and those that we love. It is constant. It is strong. It is transparent. The glass shows us our love for other people. For me, it shows Loki’s—

“You mean your fiancé?” Loki corrected from the classroom door. You nodded and smiled at your trickster.

“It shows my fiancé’s love for me. It can show a mother’s love. A love for a pet. In this case, it showed us true love. It showed me clarity.”

“Is that why love magic is mostly water?” a different student asked.

“Yes and no,” you told the student. “Love magic can be in all different elements. But yes, love flows like water does. I’m afraid that’s all the time we have for today. Please revie—

“They’re gone, darling,” Loki kissed you on the forehead, watching the last student race out the door. “I had hoped you could help if you were done with classes.”

“Oh? What do you need? A potion? A spell?” You asked him. He shook his head and flashed you the same smile you fell in love with many years ago.

“A prank.” Loki offered you his hand and his plans as both of you walked through the palace to find Sif, the poor victim, hand-in hand.

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lionokoye · 5 years

Text

Catching Up - Evie & Zaki

Muses involved:

@eviedeluna

@lionokoye

When:

Halloween night

Synopsis: Zaki stays in during the bulk of the Halloween party. Evie seeks Zaki out to make sure he’s fine. The two end up revealing what had happened in the past four years to them both for better or worse.

Zaki wasn’t going to go to the halloween party. He had watched groups of students and staff members walk down his street towards campus for it. They were energetic, loud and excited, it had been quite some time since Zaki had been that way. He really didn’t like parties, it was like pulling teeth to get him to go to social events. The halloween party was probably the worst of them. It brought up a lot of bad memories for him, it had been the first social event on the island after he had first gotten here. Instead, he was actually doing some cooking to take his mind off things. His home was mostly dark, a light on in the kitchen but dimmed and a candle in the living room with his record player going. He wasn’t any good at cooking, but it did take his mind off of the evening's event. Water was boiling with angel hair pasta inside the pot, he had just put on the garlic butter sauce in a pan when he heard his doorbell. Suspiciously, Zaki sauntered over to his front door and looked through the peephole. It was Evie. It instantly made his heart skip a beat. Slowly, he opened the door, standing there in his jeans and a burgundy sweater. “Hey, everything alright?” he asked. Part of him wondered how Evie had found his place, or if this was by mistake. His home was rather well known around the island, so she could have simply asked someone if he was who she was looking for.

She had been at the party momentarily, only going to see if Zaki would make an appearance. As a slave on the island she didn’t have as much freedom to go wandering for him, but since seeing him again, she couldn’t get him off her mind. She remembered how many years ago, this same party was where they met and spoke for the first time, it brought a small smile to her face as she thought back to how snappy she had been. After being at the party for some time, she realized he wasn’t going to arrive, but she wanted to see him. The brunette asked around for directions to his place, still pretty unfamiliar with the island, it’d been too long. She made her way over, in a fitted red dress, and dark makeup. She wasn’t one to dress up in a costume, growing out of the tradition a year or two prior, but she still wanted to show she was into the dark and spooky holiday. Nervously, she rang his bell, hoping she wouldn’t be interrupting him much. Her eyes lit up when he opened the door, “Yes, everything’s fine. I just didn’t see you at the party so I figured I’d pay you a visit, see if you were okay.”

There had been times when Zaki had felt distracted from work. He had lost people here, had some personal matters on his mind. But this last week he’d hit an absolute block, going home early some days even, which was incredibly rare. Part of him was nervous Evie was going to show up at his work. And although deep down he loved seeing her, his anxiety gave him mixed feelings about getting too close to her. Zaki looked her over, modestly and nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just, don’t really go to parties. I think I went to the New Years party a couple years ago? It was the last one I’ve been too,” he said with a shrug. Zaki realized he should invite her in out of the cool night air and opened the door a bit more. “I’m sorry. I should have offered. Do you want to come in?” He asked stepping aside. His home was relatively small, considering his resources. But it was quieter than living in the dorms on campus. “Were you at least having a nice time there?” The incubus added.

She’d had a lot on her mind as well, since their last conversation. She was ready to talk to him, to tell him what she had been through, it was only fair, the last thing Evie wanted was for Zaki to feel as if her acting a bit wary was his fault. She also figured, if they were to ever take things further, whether it be as friends or lovers, it was important for her to be honest and transparent with him. She gave him a nod, understanding exactly how he felt, she wasn’t a fan of parties either but had only gone to see him. “I get it, parties can take a lot out of you,” she said biting her lip nervously. Usually she was loud and confident, but he calmed her loud attitude down a lot, and made her into someone she wouldn’t even recognize. “Oh yes please, it’s really cold out here,” she chuckled, rubbing her arms for warmth. Evie took a few steps so she was inside his home, but didn’t want to waltz in without his permission, “Your home is lovely, I like it a lot, very humble like you.” The girl shook her head at his question, “Oh not at all. I hate parties too, I just went hoping that you’d be there. When you weren’t I figured it was best I get out of there before I got too annoyed.”

Zaki has fantasized plenty of times of Evie showing up at his door. For a while after she had left, he woke up in the middle of the night, thinking he had heard someone knocking at his door, thinking it was her. He would check, but no one was ever there. “Yes, I don’t have much to say. Large crowds just really aren’t my thing,” he admitted. Not to mention, the Halloween dance was pretty sentimental to him, it was bound to bring up some emotions he had buried. “Yeah? I like it. It’s not flashy. But plenty of space for one person, and much quieter than living on campus. This is always the sort of home I wanted to start a family in,” Zaki told Evie. It was big enough to start a family in, especially with the large basement. “Make yourself at home, pretend it’s as much yours as it is mine. I was making some dinner. But if you’ve already eaten I think I have some ice cream, or maybe just some coffee?” Zaki offered as he walked through the living room to turn off the record player. He went back to the kitchen and began to stir his pan. His home was well manicured. He didn’t use it much, mostly being at work only using this place to sleep, so there wasn’t much up keep involved in it. “Me? Really? Why is that? I think you might be the first person to go to those things hoping to find me there. I’m very honored,” he teased.

“Yeah they’re not really my thing either. I like to be alone or with good company, it’s loud over there. Too many people losing their minds in some cheesy costumes,” she chuckled. “It’s beautiful, it kind of takes you off the luxuries that surround this island. Takes you back to the less intense kind of world,” she smiled. It was hard to hear him talk about a family, she was sure if she had stayed all those years ago, they would have been married with children by now, and that was a thought that pained her. “Thank you,” she said sweetly before walking into the home and taking a seat on a nearby couch, “Oh some coffee would be nice thanks, I kind of need to warm up a bit.” She wasn’t sure why there seemed to be tension in the air, it was a lot more awkward talking to him than the first time they reunited. “You don’t remember?” she questioned, “It’s where we first met. Well, where we first really talked to each other. I was so rude and you were so patient,” she smiled to herself as she thought of it. “I figured it would be nice to relive that a little bit, go back to when things were okay just for one night.” Her smile faded and she let out a sigh as she clutched onto her purse a bit tighter.

Zaki smiled, enjoying the fact that she wasn’t into a big event like that, either. However Zaki wouldn’t have minded it so much if he had a date for it. He’d have felt as though he had a reason to go to it. Someone to spend his time with rather than being a lonely wallflower. He walked over to warm pot of coffee and poured the dark liquid into a mug. “No, I — I do remember, actually,” he admitted, not wanting to sound so eager. His life had changed that night. He was close to going somewhere else to start a new life. But meeting her had changed that. He was willing to give this place a chance. “It was also part of why I don’t like going to the Halloween party. It just, doesn’t feel right. It never did after you left and only reminded me of how lonely I was. I didn’t want to go tonight and make you feel obligated to spend time with me,” Zaki added while opening his fridge. He brought back some creamer and placed it on the kitchen island, standing across from her. “I didn’t think you were rude. Not at all. Your personality was what attracted me to you. You were fiery and blunt. Maybe even a bit of a brat in a way. I really enjoyed being there with you. I don’t remember much about that night. But I do remember seeing you there and spending the evening getting to know each other. I was surprised you wanted to waste your time on me, and not someone who wasn’t 15 years older than you and boring as all hell,” he joked, offering a bright smile to her.

Her eyes lit up hearing that she wasn’t the only one who remembered. It was a lot for her, for many years she didn’t remember. Now that she did, her memories with Zaki were all she ever thought about. “Well, we were bound to find each other tonight anyways,” she chuckled. “You know you’d never make me feel obligated to do anything right? I may be a bit softer around you but I’d never let anyone take advantage of me again. Never.” Her tone of voice changed a bit as she spoke, remembering that night as if it was just yesterday. After that day, she made her workouts harder, and made sure she’d always stay strong enough to fight off anyone who was willing to hurt her again. “I was a brat. I like to think I kept some of that spunk, I’m just older now, not as much energy to fight with everyone I talk to. If I’m honest with you, the only reason I even gave you any attention that night was because you’re hot,” she laughed. “None of the other men on this island were really my type, and none really are my type now. Neither are the women, you seemed to be the only beacon of light of this hellhole, and you just turned out to be a really amazing guy so I guess I lucked out that night.”

He felt such a raw connection to Evie. There was no shaking it, not even four years later. It was just as strong as the day she left. Zaki has a compulsive side, but it was the side of him he never acted on. He was rational, logical, well thought out. And yet he wanted to kiss her so badly, and thank her for returning. But he couldn’t do that, not yet. Not after he told her his secret. “You were a brat, you’re right,” he started as he walked around the island and took a seat on the stool next to her. “And although you were very beautiful, and your smile made me forget all of my issues, it was the fact you didn’t take crap from anyone that made me want to spend the evening with you,” he admitted. Zaki leaned on to the dark marble granite countertop, folding his hands together. “I don’t know how on earth I lucked out that I was your type. But I thank God every day,” he added, still smiling at her. Being called “hot” by her made him beam, internally. “I’m really not a great guy. I’ve made mistakes. I’m not perfect. You didn’t find someone when you were gone? No one to treat you like you deserve?” Zaki asked.

She’d be lying to herself if she said she didn’t want to pounce on him and kiss him the second she saw him again. But she knew things took time, as much as she missed him and wanted to be with him, she knew they’d both experienced a lot in the last four years and it would be irresponsible to just dive into a relationship and pretend neither one of them had changed. She laughed, “Hey only I can call myself a brat,” she joked. “I was such a bitch to you though, I don’t know why and I don’t know how you found it in yourself to stick it out.” The human raised a brow at his words, “A demon thanking God? How strange,” she teased, hoping it would lighten some of the tension in the room. Her smile fell quickly when he brought up the time she was away, “No. All I found when I left was pain and a lot of experiences I wish I could go back and erase,” she replied, nearly choking up as she thought about it.

Zaki couldn’t help but let out a chuckle in his low, gravelly voice. The last thing he would have called her was a bitch, nor did he remember her as such at the party. She was way too charming to be considered one. “No, it was actually the opposite. I wanted to stay here, because of you. I really hated it when I first got here. But after meeting you, I wanted to be here. I didn’t want to leave here. I wanted to see what happened to us. Whether that was something short lived or something meaningful, a friendship or a relationship. I just needed to see what would happen,” he told her. As she began to get choked up, Zaki sat straight up. “Whoa, hey,” he started. Zaki got up from the stool and went across the kitchen to get a small box of Kleenex. He brought it to her and sat back down. “It’s okay, Evie. You can let it out here. It’s safe,” he assured her. Out of impulse, he reached out, gently placing his large rough palm to cover her fingertips gently. Evie was a princess, in his mind. She deserved the perfect partner to take care of her.

“And you stood all this time?” she felt her heart race in her chest, unsure if she saw it as romantic or something to be ashamed of if he had stood on the island waiting for her to return. “I wanted a relationship with you. I saw us getting married one day, maybe having kids. It was the life I always wanted, a life I never thought I’d have and I feel so shitty about messing it up.” She appreciated him quickly moving to sit beside her and comfort her. It made her feel better knowing how caring he was, but there was still a fear that he’d judge her for what she had done. “I made really bad choices when I got home,” she started, gripping onto his hand tightly before continuing. “When I got home, my mom was sick and my brother was rebelling as teenagers do. Momma was busy taking care of mom and the hospital bills and no one knew what was going on with Jesus so I took it into my hands to figure out where he was sneaking off to and what he was doing. It turned out that he had gotten mixed in with the wrong crowd at school and had joined a gang.” She took a deep breath as the story got harder for her to tell, “It was my fault, at least that’s how I feel. I left him alone and my moms couldn’t give him the attention he needed and he turned to people who made him feel like he had a family, but they were bad people. I was dumb and I took it upon myself to go and tell them to leave him alone, that he wasn’t old enough to know better and that they should be ashamed of themselves for preying on young men.” Tears began to fall from her eyes as she got to the most horrific part, “It was so stupid of me, thinking I could take four men on my own...they overpowered me easily and um…” her voice cracked towards the end of her sentence, “they...you know…” It had only been a few months since the incident and it was still really difficult for Evie to even say the word, she couldn’t do it. All she could do in that moment was let the tears fall from her eyes while holding tightly onto Zaki’s hands, almost quivering as she recalled the nightmare of a night.

Zaki listened, not even thinking to interrupt. Whatever burden she had on her shoulders needed to be let off. He was nervous as to what it could be. It wasn’t because he would view her any different, he was just worried about what had happened to her. “Evie, I’m so sorry,” he finally said after she had finished. His eyes grew watery at the thought of someone hurting her. He felt as if it was his fault, not being there to protect her. There wasn’t a single worried he could think of that expressed how sorry or how angry he was, whatever he could say felt so insufficient. Leave it Evie to think she could take on 4 gang members by herself. With her small fingers wrapped around his hand, he could literally feel her emotion as she trembled. “I wish I had been there to have helped you. That must have been terrible. It probably still is,” he tried to console her. “You don’t have to worry. I won’t let anything like that happen again,” Zaki added, knowing that that probably wasn’t good enough.

Her breath hitched in her throat as he spoke, she wasn’t done telling her story, and it was mostly the next piece of it she was worried about. “I’m not done….” she added softly. “You couldn’t have done anything, I went alone. I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want anyone else getting hurt I just wanted my family back.” She shook her head, a few tears dripping onto their hands, “I got pregnant from it,” she muttered. “I c-couldn’t do it. As much as I wanted a baby and a family that wasn’t the way I wanted it to go down. I just-I couldn’t live with the idea of one of them growing inside of me.” It was hard for her, and she could feel her body revolting at the idea. She was glad she’d caught the pregnancy early on, but she didn’t know his stance on these kinds of things. “I had an abortion almost immediately after finding out. There was no hesitation, no remorse. At least not until I got here and I remembered us, and how badly I wanted a baby with you.” That’s when the tears began to pour, holding his hand just wasn’t enough and she fell to lean on his shoulder, “I feel like a monster now…”

Zaki wasn’t sure how it could get much worse. Being sexually abused like that had to be the most frightening experience for anyone. His face felt hot, his heart was racing, realizing he had nearly done exactly what Evie had gone through. He’d need to come clean, and he wasn’t quite sure either Evie would be able to forgive him. He wouldn’t blame her, he could never forgive himself either. “God, Evie, I’m so sorry,” Zaki said as he softly gripped her hand. He knew that had to have been so tough for Evie, and he could literally see and hear it. He used his free hand to pull Evie in, knowing she needed an embrace of some kind. “I wish I had been there for you. Protecting you. Helping you. You must have felt so alone,” he assured her. Evie was far from a monster, she did nothing wrong. She was a victim. “You, a monster? Not at all. What else were you supposed to do?” He asked. Zaki always loved being a father, and wanted to have as many kids as he could. He was so honored to know that Evie would like that with him, eventually. “This doesn’t change my opinion of you, at all. I am just so sorry I couldn’t have been there for you.”

She let go of his hand and wrapped her arms around him, needing to feel that embrace, that reminder that she was okay now, she wasn’t there. She pulled away and wiped her tears, “I just...sometimes I regret it. I think about the fact that it wouldn’t have been that babies fault, and how I’d love the kid regardless. But then other moments I know that I wouldn’t have been able to survive that pregnancy if I kept it. That’s not the way I wanted to become a mom. I know when I did it there was no life yet but I’m scared that, that was my only chance at having a family and what if I’m not able to ever again?” she sighed nuzzling her head closer to him. It was a relief to hear that he didn’t see her any differently. “I was scared you’d be mad at me. Maybe you’d see me as dirty or damaged goods. I couldn’t bare to face you because you mean so much to me and you’re the only person whose opinion I cared about. I had to leave home after all of it, I put my family in danger, they were going to come after me when they found out about the pregnancy. So my parents and Jesus moved to the UK, and I came back here. I figured I could keep them safest if no one knew where I was.”

Zaki was sure he’d never feel Evie again. He had given up all hope of it, trying to move on with his life. It was exactly how he had remembered her fitting against him. “That’s understandable. Whatever you are feeling, I am sure others have felt the same,” he told her, trying to help her through her emotions. She must have been overwhelmed, and he was far from qualified to help her, or any other victim of rape through it. He’d just try to console her as much as he could, be a listening ear for anything she wanted to talk about. Perhaps that could make her feel a sliver better. “Yeah, you did the right thing. A pregnancy should be on your terms, with someone you love. If someone says differently, I’ll make sure they don’t both you again,” Zaki told her. It wasn’t often he made threats like that, it was completely out of character for him. But that was how deeply connected he felt to Evie. “No, of course not. I’d never see you any differently than when I first met you. You can always be open with me, Evie. I’d never judge you. Especially for something like this. You did nothing wrong, at all,” the incubus reminded her. His mouth was dry, feeling completely drained from this, he could only imagine how she must be feeling about it. It took guts for her to admit such a thing, too. “You are safe here. And so is your family, I promise,” he told her as he began softly rubbing across her back.

“Yeah...it’s just been so hard to deal with. At this point in my life I wanted a family but not like that. I wanted to be with someone who loved me and cared for me, someone like you but I couldn’t remember you.” She was shocked to hear him threaten someone, it was out of character but she didn’t mind it. “No one’s said anything because I haven’t told anyone but you. I haven’t even told my family. I couldn’t bring myself to stress my moms out more than they already have been.” Evie smiled softly at him, her tears had stained her cheeks with some mascara. “Thank you. That makes me feel so much better. I was so scared of losing you when I got back on the island. The second my memories flooded back you were all I could think about and how I’d do anything to have what we had back.” She sniffled and shook her head, “Fuck, my makeup, I probably look like a hot mess. So much for wanting to look nice for you tonight,” she scoffed.

“Yes, I can’t even imagine. I’m not going to pretend like I can,” Zaki said, feeling overwhelmed from the admission. He wondered if she felt any better, after unburdening herself. “You know both of your moms would understand. They might have been able to support you,” Zaki reminded her. He was speaking as a parent himself. If this had happened to either Xenia or Athena, he would have wanted to know. He rarely got angry any more, but Zaki would ensure heads rolled if that were to happen. “I won’t mention it any more. But they deserve to know,” he added for good measure, hoping he would take his advice to heart. Zaki smiled at her, hearing her comment about how she must have looked. She was dead wrong. “No, not at all. You’re always beautiful. You’ll always be that smiling beauty I saw at the halloween party that night. Who for whatever reason wanted wasn’t trying to avoid me,” he joked, trying to lighten the mood. Zaki found Evie to be incredibly beautiful, but it was more than her looks that attracted him to her.

“It’s a weird feeling honestly. Part of me remembers it clearly but the other half is like trying to erase it constantly. It was terrifying and I remember just hoping I’d get out of there alive.” She sighed and shrugged, “I don’t know, maybe when mom gets better, she’s been struggling and I don’t want her to worry about me when she should be worrying about herself.” Her dark brown eyes looked up at him, still red and wet from tears she had been crying. She couldn’t help but smile at his compliments, “You’re the only person outside of my family who’s seen me like this. And I’ve only opened up to you because I still love you, every piece of you I adore and I haven’t been able to get you out of my head since I got my memories back.” A manicured hand found its way to his cheek, cupping it softly before leaning in to place a soft kiss on his lips. It wasn’t where she had intended this evening to go, but in the moment all she wanted was to feel close to him again, to feel like there was a chance things would be okay between them.

Zaki nodded as she spoke. “Yeah, you are probably lucky to be alive. I know it’s not a great way of looking at it. But I’m very glad you were able to make it out alive,” he told her. Perhaps it was a bad way of looking at it. But Evie’s story could have completely ended that day, quite easily. “That’s understandable, yes. The news probably wouldn’t help her sickness. Still. It’s hard for me to imagine you having to go through all of the aftermath completely alone. The thought of her having to go to a clinic like that without anyone to comfort her.Zaki pressed his forehead to hers, feeling so calm with his stubbled cheek in her hand, and her lips to his. He just didn’t want to get hurt again. And he doubted she would feel the same way when he came clean with her. “I wish I’d have been there to help you through it. You must have felt so lonely.” Zaki didn’t exactly feel sorry for himself, but he certainly didn’t feel that way after Evie had disclosed all these events to her. “You and I both know you could choose to be with anyone you’d want. You don’t need me to reassure you, or tell you how beautiful you are. You don’t need to be reminded you aren’t broken. You’re incredible. And if you don’t know that yet, you will eventually,” he added.

“It’s the only thing that’s kept me going, knowing it could’ve been worse and that it wasn’t.” She shifted in her seat and nodded, “I’ll tell them eventually, I just can’t give them more stress. I don’t want to hurt them anymore than I already have. It was really hard, and I don’t think anyone should go through an abortion alone but I had to do what I had to do and I’m okay for the most part. There’s just a part of me that worries I made a mistake.” When he pulled away from her kiss she looked away, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me. I shouldn’t have done that it wasn’t appropriate,” she sighed, clearing her throat. “I know. But I don’t want to be with just anyone. To me, loyalty, honesty, they’re important and not many people have those qualities. I haven’t met many men or women who were willing to crack down the walls I built up. Not many tried to find the good in me like you did. I don’t want to make you feel like I’m rushing things because I don’t want that, I know you probably feel some kind of way about me leaving and that’s something you have to heal, but I’m not going anywhere this time. I don’t have anywhere to go, this is my home now.”

It was terrible that Evie’s only silver lining to that story was that she wasn’t disposed of. “I’m very thankful you’re here. I hope I can help you feel better about yourself. Ultimately, your confidence can only come from yourself,” he reminded her. Evie was at her best when confident. Perhaps the fact she had toned it down a bit wasn’t because she was older, but because she was traumatized. He hoped she could get to that point again, it was so genuine to who Evie was. “No, you never need to apologize for that. I’ve been hoping for that for a very long time. I just don’t want to regret it, is all,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. His eyes were facing down, his forehead still planted to hers. “No, no, you leaving, it’s not about forgiveness or healing. You had to go. I needed to find myself, without your help. It was just how it was supposed to go. But, I did something after you left. And honesty is important, you’re right. I know you probably wont want to speak to me again. You might even leave after you hear this, I’m not sure. But I feel like I need to tell you, I behaved badly after you left. There was a grant student, who saw me emotional after you had left. And I got upset. Really upset. And, I lost control,” he admited.

Evie bit her lip and shrugged, “Hopefully. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever feel like myself again, but I keep telling myself to give it time. This all happened fairly recently, I shouldn’t expect to get over it overnight.” She looked away from him, “Right. I left the first time, I hurt you. I don’t blame you for wanting to protect yourself. I should’ve asked before kissing you, it wasn’t right I just...I don’t know why I did it.” She grew quiet quickly as he began to speak, her perfectly plucked eyebrows furrowed as he opened up about losing control. “Well that all depends on what happened. What do you mean by you lost control? What did you do to them?” she questioned, her voice nervous as her mind wandered to all the most terrible places. Evie knew he was technically a demon, and regardless of how calm and collected she was used to seeing him, he was capable of things she couldn’t imagine. It was in his nature to respond in violence, and she had hoped nothing too bad had happened.

Zaki wasn’t sure either, if Evie would ever feel like herself. Regardless, he’d be there for her in whatever capacity she needed from him. But, he was starting to think she might not want anything to do with him at all. “I was at the beach. I used to go there, a lot. I was upset, and crying,” he admitted. Zaki wasn’t your typical alpha male, wasn’t the type to neglect his feelings. But he did feel so emasculated admitting that to her. “And this grant student started telling me that I have it so much better than she did. And that I shouldn’t be upset because I wasn’t a slave like she was. I saw her again, in the cells. I grabbed her, and I... “ Zaki paused. He really hadn’t thought about it in a very long time. He hated what he did, and wanted to forget he could ever get that angry. “My demon side came out. I couldn’t help myself. The next thing I knew I was on the verge of hurting her, of sexually assaulting her. I stopped when I came too, beroe anything happened. I just broke down, and I cried right there. I’ve told her how sorry I was, later on. I offered any way to help make her whole. Even offering money to her or family. I know that’s a shitty way to atone for what I did. But if there was anything I could do to help make her whole, I would, and I explained that to her. And now, with what happened to you, I just feel so much worse about it,” Zaki said, feeling out of breath.

Evie listened to him quietly, she could feel the tears building up in her eyes again as he went into detail.

The lump in her throat becoming harder to swallow. She was angry with him, absolutely disgusted that he would do such a thing. Of course there was a side of him she hadn’t gotten to know, his demon side, but she couldn’t process that at the moment. “How could you?” she said, feeling the panic of it all hit her. She stood from her place on the couch and began to breathe heavily, “No! Y-you can’t just fucking go and say sorry. You can’t pay someone off Zaki!” she yelled. “That’s not how it works! No amount of money or apologies are ever going to erase the pain and fear you put in her do you understand that?! She’s going to go to bed every night thinking about how close you got to taking a piece of her. She’s going to think about every hand you put on her, she’s going to dream about it and wake up screaming in fear. And no amount of apologies or money is ever going to change that!” She was bawling at this point, not even being able to see him properly with the amount of tears falling down her cheeks. “You’re not the victim no matter how hurt you are, you’re not the victim. I just can’t believe you’d do something like that...I thought you were better, I thought you were different. I thought I could trust you to touch me and hold me and now I’m...how can I when you were on the verge of hurting someone the way I was hurt by others?”

He couldn’t explain it. Even if he could, there would be no justification for it, he would have to live with his decision forever. “I -- I can’t explain it. I don’t know why I did that. Why I didn’t just leave it be. I was so angry. I let the demon inside of me come out,” he admitted. His voice even changed in that moment, he wasn’t acting like himself. It was the exact reason his father had raised him to be more like a human. “I’m not a victim at all, I understand that and I didn’t mean for it to come across as that. I’m far from it. I really, really screwed up. I starved myself since then.Hoping to never give myself the chance to even react that way,” he told Evie. To ensure he couldn’t hurt someone, Zaki rarely had sex. He couldn’t remember the last time he rented a grant student. He had been intimate with maybe 5 women since Evie left and even then it was sparingly, and because he was attracted to them. It wasn’t to gain power. Zaki had sex less than humans did, despite his primal need for it. “I screwed up. I’ve hurt her, forever. I don’t have a way to excuse it, or to make it so you, or her, or anyone doesn’t hate me for it. I hope you know me well enough to know when I say I would never attempt to do that to anyone else, you’d know I Was telling the truth. I hope you can at least give me a chance to prove that to you, Evie,” Zaki added.

She was practically shaking with anger as he spoke, half of his words not even registering with her. Evie’s fists were clenched and her breathing was heavy as she paced back and forth trying to calm herself. “I’m just so fucking tired of men thinking they can have their every which way with us! I’m tired! It doesn’t matter what you look like, who you are, we’re just fuck toys to all of you,” she ranted, she paused for a moment before throwing a punch at the wall nearby, going at it over and over again to get her anger out, it hurt her but she didn’t know what else to do to calm down. Her knuckles began to bleed as she continued to throw her punches, “It’s not fair! There’s no excuse, I don’t give a shit what species you are, how much money you have, you had no right!” She couldn’t stop, half of her anger wasn’t even towards him, it was all the anger she felt towards the men who had hurt her that she never had the opportunity to let out. “I thought you were different...you were supposed to be different,” she whimpered, slowing her punches as she felt herself overcome with defeat. She didn’t care that her knuckles were bleeding and that she was in pain, she just found herself sliding down to the floor, letting the numbness she felt right after her attack, overcome her once more.

Zaki has always felt terrible about what he had done. But now, he felt a rush of shame. Evie has put him up on a pedestal, and he had come crashing down it, whipping out people on the way down. He’d never come close to being on the pedestal again. “No, it wasn’t like that. I don’t think that about anyone,” he tried to tell her. Zaki was far from displaying toxic masculinity, and even as an incubus he didn’t view human women as toys for him. Sex was about intimacy, not about nourishment in his mind. And it certainly wasn’t to be used as a weapon. As Evie struck his wall, he got up and quickly approached her. He grabbed her by her shoulders to pull her away, not out of fear of the damage he would do to his wall, but the damage she could do to herself. Before he could do that, she slid down to the floor. She had already dented the wall, the dry wall caving in as a result. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I am a piece of shit like they were. If you want to never speak to me, I wouldn’t be mad at you. I would understand it. But don’t lose faith in everyone, please. There are people out there better than me. Ones who won’t let you down, I promise,” Zaki tried to tell her, kneeling down next to her. “I always thought you deserved better than me. I hope we can at least be friends or at least civil.”

She knew that wasn’t the reason why he’d gone after that student, it was all her projecting her own trauma onto his situation. Evie hadn’t properly dealt with what she went through, she dealt with it alone and had not told anyone. She was bound to explode at some point, and it just so happened to be now. The tears continued to fall from her eyes, this evening was supposed to be the best night for them, the night they’d bond again, the night they’d share a hug, perhaps a kiss but it turned out to be a night of horror, no pun intended. She looked up at him, shaking her head, “That’s the worst part. I don’t hate you, and I don’t want to leave. I should, I should want to. After what I went through I should’ve been out that door a long time ago,” she told him. “But I can’t. I can’t leave again because how I feel about you just goes above and beyond everything else. I hate myself for it, you shouldn’t have this much of an effect on me but you do. I know it wasn’t you, it wasn’t the you that I know. It was the side of you I never got to see the side of you I brought out. I should’ve never left, I should’ve stayed, if I stayed, none of this would’ve happened. We’d be happy like I want us to be, you wouldn’t have hurt anyone, no one would’ve hurt me. We could’ve been happy and I messed it up, and now I’m here chasing after you, wanting you to love me again so badly that I’m sitting here still wanting to kiss you and hold you after what you just told me. How stupid is that?” she was angry at herself, no matter how angry she felt about his actions, she couldn’t bring herself to leave, a big part of her still wanted him and couldn’t leave him behind again.

Evie was blaming herself for it. Which couldn’t have been further from the truth. It was his decision. He was a demon, it was sadly in his nature to do things like this. Zaki hardly remembered what happened, he wasn’t sure if it was because it was so long ago, or if that was part of the effects of his demon side. Zaki simply remembers feeling her in his hands, his face red hot with anger before he fell to the floor. “No, stop. This was my fault. I have to deal with the consequences of it. You did what you needed to do. I should have let it go. I should have buried that dark side of me,” he said, his gravelly voice slightly shaky. “You never need to feel like you’re obligated to be with me. I would never blame you for wanting better. Someone who wasn’t a monster. You deserve the best,” he added. Zaki used the back of his hand to while his wet cheek. “I’m a monster. I am literally a demon. The mother of my child would have rather have been alone than with me, to give you some kind of context. And I would never hate her, I never did hate her. And I would never hate you for doing the same, Evie,” he explained. It had been a long time ago now, but the mother of Athena was so afraid of what he would become, she kicked him out which was what brought him to this island in the first place.

“You can’t. It’s not possible, you shouldn’t have done what you did and I’m not excusing it but you’re never going to be able to be human. You’ll never have the morality of a human, you’re a demon. I’ve never seen that side of you, and I hope I never have to but I know it exists and I know that you’re capable of very scary things if you allow it to take over.” She sighed and wiped her tears, the blood from her hands smearing under her eyes, she winced from the pain of the salted tears infiltrating the wounds on her knuckles. “Stop it!” she yelled at him. “I don’t feel obligated to do anything for you, I just love you!” she exclaimed. “I love you so fucking much and I don’t know why. I haven’t seen you in four years but all I want is to be with you again, it doesn’t make sense to me why the feelings are still so strong but they are. It’s not because I feel like I owe you anything, they’re just there.” she took a deep breath, “If this was after I left, it’s been a while and I can…I can forgive you in time. I get that you’re a demon I signed up for things like this the second I fell for you, and I can’t be angry at your forever for acting on impulse as part of who you are. I’m not even mad at you. Disappointed yes but, my anger is not towards you, it could never be…”

“I’ve done my best to prevent this from ever happening again. I’ve suppressed that side of me. I’ve starved it, I never want anyone to have to deal with that again. My father always hated that he passed on this gene to me. I never understood why until that moment, when that side of me actually hurt someone,” Zaki said. He wasn’t entirely sure what he had told Evie about his childhood, but it wasn’t pretty. There was a lot of abuse because of the demon inside of him. Perhaps at some point he would mention that. But currently it would just come across as an excuse. He slowly stood up, and grabbed a hand towel before returning. He wiped the blood from her hand, gently. Zaki kisses her forehead while doing it, wanting to make her feel whole again both emotionally and physically. “I appreciate that. I would be grateful if you can forgive me. You will have to give me advice on how to forgive myself,” he asked of her. In reality, the event was dissimilar from Evie’s. This school was odd. It blurred the lines of what consent meant, and what sort of rules went along with that. Not to mention, Evie was hurt for simply trying to save her brother. Zaki hated that dark side of him. But if he ever found out who those men were, he was afraid that dark side of him would return. “We should clean that hand. It’s not too bad. But we should make sure it’s taken care of, yeah?” He offered.

“I believe you,” she said softly. Her anger had subsided, the cloud over her eyes vanishing and bringing herself back to Earth. “Asking you to never hurt anyone ever would be like asking a lion to never hunt a gazelle. You getting out of hand with your demon side, it was bound to happen at some point in your life.” She closed her eyes and let out a sigh of relief as he kissed her forehead. “I’ll try my best, as long as you help me forgive myself as well,” she added. She knew the subject of his situation was tricky, the school had strange rules, and technically he was able to do as he pleased with whoever was below him. She looked down at her hand and nodded, “Yeah, I’m sorry I fucked up your wall...I don’t know what came over me. I just had a lot of anger inside, not towards you. I never properly dealt with what happened to me, I was projecting and it was wrong of me to do. I know you’d never purposely hurt anyone in this form, I know you’d never hurt me. It was just a lot to hear, especially because of how much you mean to me. You’re the only thing here making me feel grounded. I hoped tonight at the party things would spark up between us again, but I guess we’re just both as broken as we used to be. Nothings really changed has it?” she scoffed.

“I can control it. I promise,” he assured her. She had given him an out, but he didn’t want to take it. Since then, he never had an experience like that. He never wanted revenge, or felt a desire to hurt other people. That side of him had been buried over the past four years. “You have nothing that needs forgiveness. You were hurt by someone else. You have a big heart, and some people took advantage of that,” he reminded her. Their stories were completely different, he deserved no compassion, but she did. “No, that’s fine. I’ve been thinking about having it repainted. So you’ve sort of settled that for me,” he joked back. Evie would never need to apologize for just about anything she did. And honestly, he deserved all issues that came his way for his awful actions. “We should get you your own personal punching bag. We can can set it up in the basement. This way you don’t have to deal with the rec center, if you don’t want,” he offered. Zaki had had a few ideas for what to do with his basement, but they never came to fruition. “I think it’s just going to take time. We’ve both changes, we’ve grown, we’ve gone through things,” the incubus reminded her. Zaki had been hurt, not to the same level as Evie had been. He’d only let people in, people he trusted, only to be betrayed by them.

She knew he’d never hurt her, at least she hoped that was the case. In the end, he was and would always be a demon and Evie had to be prepared for that. He was sweet with his words but she didn’t see it that way. She knew what she had done had been reckless and as much as people told her it wasn’t her fault, she couldn’t help but think exactly that. She smiled a bit at his joke, she realized in that moment she’d lost control. Her feelings had taken over her and she’d hurt herself and his home, the same way he had lost control and hurt someone else. Although the situations differed and it wasn’t an excuse for his actions, Evie understood. “You don’t have to do that,” she said, shaking her head. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything for me.” The human let out a sigh, as much as she didn’t want to admit it, he was right. “I know, I just wish I could go back and change everything. I wish I’d never left just so we didn’t have to start over. It sucks and now I’m scared we’ll never get back to where we were.”

“I’m so sorry. And not just to you, obviously. Because I feel like I ruined her life. I want to atone for it. If you have any idea of what I can do to make this woman feel better, please, let me know,” he asked Evie. Perhaps she would be able to help him figure out a way to try and make his victim whole. “I don’t feel obligated to yo do anything for you. I just -- it’s a product of how close I feel to you. I want to do whatever I can to help you,” Zaki said with a shrug. But honestly, he usually did things for others, regardless of how close he felt to them. It was in his nature to be selfless to help, especially to the grant students here. “You are the type of person who does things for those you care about. You should let those who care about you do the same. Our lives would have been different if you didn’t leave. I think we needed it, though. To really understand what life is like without each other in our lives. If we don’t get back to where we were, that’s okay. As long as you’re a part of my life, in any capacity I would be thankful, Evie. I’m just glad I get to see you. And that I get to spackle my wall every so often,” he joked.

“I don’t know. You said you apologized, that’s all you can do. Now I would just leave her alone, let her heal in her own time. The last thing I would want is to see the men who hurt me again. I just wanted to get far away from them and give myself time to regroup. This is one thing you can’t fix.” She looked away from him for a moment, she was the type to jump at any opportunity to protect those she loved, it was what got her into this jumbled mess in the first place. “I’m trying I really am. I just never saw the need or want for someone to baby me. I’m my own person and I can pull my own weight, I don’t need anyone there to hold my hand and I don’t want to put any of my burdens on anyone else.” She shrugged, “But you don’t know that. We could’ve been so happy. We could’ve been married, we could’ve had a family by now, there’s so much that we could’ve been.” It was hard for her to think she’d ruined it all so long ago, and she wasn’t sure she’d be able to provide him with who he fell for all those years ago. A small chuckle left her lips as he spoke about the wall, she winced as the pain from her injured hand stung again.

Zaki had no issue with leaving her alone. He often felt so embarrassed when he was in the same room with her. It was most likely both of their lowest moments, and it was all his fault. “Yeah, I don’t think the issue will be me giving her space. I am completely fine if she never would like to see or speak to me again,” he said with a small smirk. Perhaps he shouldn’t have been trying to make light of the situation. Evie did have a point with all that she said, all those things could have come to fruition. But it didn’t work that way. Zaki was able to work past it and find meaning in it. “You’re looking at it the wrong way. We’re both here now. You came back. I’m still here. There’s something to that. We can pick up the pieces and see what we can with them,” he tried to tell her. It wasn’t difficult to see it from Evie’s perspective, he wasn’t getting any younger. Zaki lifted a hand up, cupping her soft, moist cheek in his rough palm. “I don’t care how long it took for you to come back. I’m very happy about that. I get to see you again. I get to feel you holding my hand and hugging me. It’s exactly what I was hoping for. I never thought I’d get to have that again. I’m still thinking that I am in a dream. I think I’m actually better equipped to have you in my life now,” the incubus added, trying to put a positive spin on this. “I think you should get up off the floor. It’s late. We can sit in the living room if you want? Or if you’re tired, you can take one of my spare rooms. I have plenty of space here. You’re always welcome to sleep here,” he offered.

She nudged him when he tried to make light of the topic and shook her head, “Don’t do that, only she’s allowed to make light of it,” she reminded him. Perhaps she was looking at it incorrectly, they were different now but if they still had that love for one another and could make it work then it would just prove how they are meant to be together. Her chocolate eyes met with his as he cupped her cheek, a small sigh leaving her full lips. It felt nice to have that soft touch, Evie had starved herself from that kind of affection, after her incident she found it hard to convince herself she was worthy of it. “I’m just scared I won’t be able to be what you want or need,” she muttered. She lit up at the idea of spending the night, the cots back in the cells were still uncomfortable and she had a long night, a well made bed to lay in sounded like heaven. “I’d like that a lot. I don’t think I want to go back to my cell after tonight, I just need to be somewhere comfortable and safe. I”m not tired yet but is there any way I could borrow some pajamas? This dress isn’t exactly made for comfort.”

Zaki wasn’t exactly sure what she meant by that. She was more than enough for him, and always would be. She might have felt so different, but he didn’t view her and differently her second time around. “Evie, that’s — that’ll never be the case. You;ol always be you. And that all you’ll need to be around me. I’ll always care about you. You don’t need to try and act or behave in a certain way,” he reminded her. It didn’t make sense to him, but that was understandable. She went through something he never had, something terrible and traumatic. It made him mad, which was not something he felt very often. Honestly, it was something he hadn’t felt in years, having gotten very talented at containing his anger issues. “Yes, I don’t blame you. Feel free to make that room your own. It’s always available to you to use, whether I’m home or not. If someone says anything to you, just explain I am thinking about renting you or something,” he suggested. Zaki had rented someone in a very long time.. And he only remembered using it to help a slave stay away from the cells for long periods of time, never for any selfish reasons. “Pajames? Yeah I think I can help you out,” he said, getting to his feet and offering Evie a hand to escort her to his room.

She was relieved to hear he’d take her as is, but there was a part of her that questioned it. “I’m not as wild about life as I used to be. I know how much you liked it when I talked back to people and had a bit of spunk about me. But I’ve just been so tired,” she began. “I still have some of that in me sure, but it’s not like it used to. After what happened to me I’m too drained to want to fight everyone who crosses my path.” she explained to him. It had been a long night and she wanted to get out of the fitted dress she was in and just relax, so much for getting dolled up. She took his hand with the less injured one she had, and rose from her place on the floor, “Really? Thank you. Being in the cells has fucked up my back way more than I’d like to admit it has.” She followed him to the room slowly, “I think just a big t shirt would do. This dress isn’t the most comfortable thing I own and I think my body is just ready to relax for the night.”

Zaki didn’t care what Evie looked like. But he would be lying if he said she wasn’t physically attractive. Four years later, that opinion hadn’t changed, nut it wouldn’t have made any difference, regardless. “Well, maybe you can get some actual rest and relaxation here. I know that might sound ridiculous, because of your situation here,” he started,referring to her being a grant student here. “But I want you to worry about your classes. You can just come here if you ever feel overwhelmed. It’s a safe place. I won’t even annoy you,” he said with a laugh. It was true, he would probably he at work, to be honest. Although if anyone could lure him out of his office, it would be Evie. Zaki started looking through some of his dressers, before finding some buttoned white dress shirts. “Honestly, I wish I could help every grant student here. I took a new job here to try and do that, help get them in and out of this school as quick as possible,” he told her. Zaki had offered others the ability to come and stay at his home, but he really never got anyone to take him up on it. The offer really was genuine, without any sort of strings attached to it. “Here, take your pick,” he said, picking up a few pillows from his bed.

She had changed since he’d last saw her, it wasn’t drastic but it was there. Her hair was shorter, her hips a bit wider and she’d matured a bit in her face. There was something about younger Evie, that stroke of innocence she carried with her that gave her a glimmer in her eyes, that something that was stripped away from who she was now. “That sounds wonderful actually. It’s really hard to focus on my studies when I’m sharing a room with three other people who won’t shut the fuck up,” she said, rolling her eyes at the thought of her cellmates. She began to remove her jewelry as he rummaged through his drawers for something for her to wear, her earrings had been weighing heavily on her and she just wanted to feel free from the constraints of getting dolled up. “That’s admirable. I know a lot of people have a hard time settling in around here.” She looked at the shirts he’d placed on the bed, softly grazing her hand over them before choosing, “This one will do,” she said with a smile, “Um do you mind unzipping me?” she questioned, looking over at him. “I’d do it myself but my hands are...well, you know bruised.”

He shrugged his shoulders. “You can customize it however you want. That room will be yours,” he said as he briefly looked down to gather a couple pillows her. Zaki had bought this home in hopes that Evie would return. It would have given them a lot of space, maybe enough to start a family at some point. It was really the biggest reason why he wanted to move out of the suites on campus. Evie could even take the entire basement if she wanted, he didn’t use his office down there very much anyway. It was charming to Zaki how she riffled through his drawer, as if it were as much hers as it was his.”I am sure there are plenty of issues you’d face down there. It’s very depressing whenever I need to meet with a new student.” It happened often, he was down there tracking down a student to go over job opportunities on campus and to figure out a plan for after graduation. Zaki felt his face grow warm when Evie asked him to unzip her, walking slowly from behind. “Sure,” he said softly, placing the pillows on the top of the dresser. It was a strange combination of unfamiliar and well practiced. It didn’t take long for him to remember doing this for her before she left. He was so close to her, and he felt compelled to lean in and kiss against her neck, as if she had never left in the first place. “You really -- you look incredible. This reminds me of the night after our dinner together,” the incubus said softly while unzipping. He really hoped he didn’t come across as creepy or forward, it was as bold as Zaki had ever been. “We’ll get you some gause before bed. I’d think if anyone could handle picking a fight with a wall here, you’d be the most prepared for it,” he teased, referring to how often he knew she practiced boxing.

“You’re really outdoing yourself,” she smiled. She always imagined eventually they’d get married and move into a cozy home to raise a family, but that had all been forgotten when she had her memories erased. Evie gave him a nod, “Yeah. I mean I understand we have to pay the debt one way or another but how are we supposed to focus on our work when every dude that goes down there expects us to suck them off?” she scoffed. “But I guess that’s the trick, they never really want us to leave.” She felt her breathing stop for a moment as he got close to her to unzip her dress, his touch was so familiar yet so foreign and she couldn’t help the happy hum that left her full lips as he pulled the zipper down. Her eyes opened at his compliment, and she found herself slowly turning to face him. One strap of her dress had fallen over her shoulder, leaving her collarbone exposed, “Thank you, it reminds me of that too. I...I chose the same color because of that night. I don’t know, I guess I hoped it would help mend some of the awkwardness and tension between us.”She wanted to reach up and kiss him, to feel his strong hands on her body as they shared their warmth with one another, but she knew he had been hesitant and she didn’t want to make him feel any more awkward. She wasn’t really one for caring about others seeing her nude or in her undergarments, so she slipped out of her dress fairly easily, her body barely covered by the pretty black lingerie she’d picked out for that evening. She chuckled at his joke as she pulled his shirt over her body, “It doesn’t even hurt that much, but if I want to continue my workouts I’ll have to heal it properly.”

Zaki still had that dress. It was buried In his closet, shoved all the way to the side of it. He wasn’t exactly sure why he held on to it. Sure, he could return it to her when she got back but she probably had dresses similar enough to it. For him, it just felt wrong to just leave it, to be discarded in the trash. He couldn’t allow that to happen. Perhaps it was a way for Zaki to be reminded that it actually happened, that Evie wasn’t just a fantasy in his mind. “Yes, I can see the resemblance to it,” he said with a nod of his head, looking the dress over. As it his the ground he stepped back to let her get his oversized shirt on. No matter what she wore, or what she didn’t wear, he was mesmerized by her. Zaki reached out with one hand to hold hers, and picked up the pillows with his other arm. He brought her to the front bedroom, which was a little bigger than the other spare one, with a nice view, too. He dropped the pillows on her bed and went into the bathroom close by that was completely hers now. He found some gause and stood in the doorway. “Come into the living room, and I’ll help you get your hand taken care of,” he offered.

She thought about that night often after getting her memories back. How excited they were, how untouchable she felt, it was all such a rush and she hoped she’d be able to feel that again someday. She followed him to the bedroom, her eyes glimmering at the sight. The bed looked so comfortable and the room was spacious, unlike the cells she’d been trapped in. “Give me a second, I want to wash off my makeup, it’s getting a little cakey,” she chuckled before making her way to the nearby bathroom. This was all a lot for her to take in, and she reminded herself to take deep breaths as she removed the makeup from her face. Evie stared at herself for a bit, bare faced, and a bit of her freckles finally able to shine through. She made her way back out to the living room where she found him waiting for her. Taking a seat beside him she placed her injured hand on his lap. There wasn’t much pain but she could feel the wound throbbing. She had a high pain tolerance but she’d be lying to herself if she said she didn’t enjoy his effort in comforting her.

Zaki nodded, fidgeting with the roll of the white fabric. Evie blew past him, and he went to the nearby living room. One of the things he liked about his place was how open it was. All three bedrooms opened up to the living room and dining area, and was more than enough space for one person. Perhaps if things worked out with Evie, they could get some place even bigger, or maybe odd on to this home. The furnishings of it were of very high quality, and made the home feel cozy. The incubus dimmed the lights in the living room and sat on the couch, finally able to peak the tape back just as Evie walked into the living room. She placed her hand in front of him, and he began to roll the gause around her palm and knuckles. “We can make sure you have everything you need here. Just leave me a list some time, big items or small. Maybe get a desk or bigger dresser in your room,” he suggested, still wrapping her up. He tucked the fabric in, and then couldn’t take it any longer. Zaki leaned in, pressing his lips to hers, softly.

The evening had been a lot for Evie, and as she washed the makeup off her face she thought about their argument from earlier. She was still upset with him to some extent, but the more she pondered on it she realized she’d been holding Zaki to the same standards as human men. It was hard for her to remember he wasn’t a human with how differently he acted from the other demons and supernatural beings on the island. There would always be that side of him, whether it was dormant or not, and whether Evie liked it or not, and if she loved him she’d have to learn to love all of him. She smiled a bit to herself seeing the lights had dimmed, it made things cozier and as she took a seat on the couch she felt as if she could melt into it and fall asleep right then and there. She flinched a bit as he wrapped her hands, it stung a bit but it wasn’t too bad. “That’s not necessary. I mean, a bed is more than enough for now. You can’t get anything done if you’re not sleeping well.” She tucked her now wrapped hand close to her before she found his lips meeting with hers. It was a bit of a shock, considering he had pulled away from her before, but she wasn’t going to let this moment pass. Evie always felt safe with him, she felt complete and grounded and this entire time she just wanted to feel close to him again. The human quickly kissed him back, using her hand to cup his cheek and pulled him in closer.

Zaki just couldn’t help himself. He knew that neither of them were ready to resume things, he wasn’t even entirely sure if Evie would ever be ready or willing to be with him. But she looked so incredibly beautiful, and those feelings he had for her had come rushing back. As she gave into the kiss, even kissing him back, he didn’t stop. He was hesitant at first, ready to pull away at the first sign of apprehension from her. He placed his hands on her hips, still leaning in to kiss her thick, full lips. Finally, Zaki broke the kiss. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t help it. I’ve thought about this, you coming back, for such a long time. I felt incredibly lonely, and seeing you here, in my living room like this, it was too much for me to handle. I hope that’s okay. I know we need to take things slow,” Zaki acknowledge, waiting to see just how Evie would react to it.

A low whimper left her lips when he placed his hands on her hips, it sent goosebumps throughout her body, it was exciting to feel him again, to feel like nothing had changed. Her eyes kept closed for a few moments after he pulled away, savoring the moment between them. She opened her eyes when he began to apologize, “No, no, don’t apologize. I liked it, I wanted it and I would do it again if you wanted to,” she said, fidgeting with her shirt a bit. “I’m going to be honest with you, after what I went through I don’t sex is going to be in the picture for a while. It’s not that I don’t trust you, I just don't think I’m ready for that yet. But I’m not against kissing and cuddling and just being close to you. It makes me feel like everything’s going to be okay. You make me feel like everything’s going to be okay. Usually I just feel like I’m floating by, going through the motions, just surviving. But when I’m with you, it definitely feels like I’m living. I know that’s cheesy,” she chuckled, “But it’s the truth.” She rubbed his cheek softly with her thumb and smiled at him, hoping he’d understand.

Zaki was slightly confused when she mentioned she also wanted it. He wanted to question her, to make her rethink if that were actually true but he kept himself from asking. It was hard for him to speak at all, still in ecstasy from the kiss. He had thought about it for the last four years, replaying it over in his head, in different situations. “I -- yeah, I would. I’ve thought about it a lot when we were apart. It’s reassuring to know you like it too,” he said with a smile, his eyes focused on the ground. He rubbed her good hand and shook his head. “No, I don’t need that. I think we should take a lot of time, anyway,” Zaki started. He wasn’t just saying this to make Evie feel better about not being ready for sex. He probably wasn’t ready for it either. In fact, it was the last thing on his mind with Evie. “I don’t think it’s cheesy. Being close to you alleviates a lot of the negative things I’ve been feeling for a long time. It’s nice to know it’s not just me,” he said with a shrug. He imagined Evie coming into his bed, surprising him just to wrap her arms around him while sleeping, or doing the same with her. Zaki leaned in and kissed her cheek a few times, trailing his lips against her before meeting her lips again.

Her eyes lit up when he mentioned wanting to do it again. For a moment she felt like she was in high school again and experiencing all of her firsts. “Of course. I haven’t felt intimacy in a long time. Mostly because I didn’t think I was deserving of it but how I craved it every night. Just those small things that make you feel close to someone.” She let out a sigh of relief when he agreed that they should take things slow, “I know I just figured, as an incubus you have to feed. I’m not opposed to it, I just need time to feel comfortable with that again. I don’t want to do it and then feel triggered and set us back even more. I need to be comfortable with touching myself again first before I let anyone get that close again.” It was an admission she didn’t think she’d tell anyone, but since her incident she couldn’t even find the desire to pleasure herself, it was all too much for her and she felt guilty at the mere thought of it. She smiled when he spoke about feeling better when being with her, it seemed for once they were on the same page because she felt the same. Evie pushed her cheek against his lips as he trailed his way back to kiss her, immediately she fell into it, kissing him back softly as she moved a little closer to him.

Zaki wrapped his arms around her, hopefully make Evie feel safe. It felt so natural to him to feel her pressed against him, embracing each other. He saw first hand the walls she put up with people, shielding herself from anything resembling intimacy. He knew it was probably even worse now, after the incident. He’d wait as long as she needed for them to be close. Finally he pulled back to respond to her. “Really, it’s okay. I don’t need it, i can go very long without that sort of nourishment,” he told her. Zaki was starved for sex, feeding very rarely. It might be more difficult to resist Evie, only because there was an emotional connection there, but he was sure he could handle that. “I’d rather work on the other aspects of a relationship with you. And when we’re both ready, we can add that to it. It would be more fun and more beneficial for us to get to know each other again before rushing it,” he added. Chances were, Evie felt the same way, but it sounded as if there was pressure on her because he was an incubus. He hated his species, he understood now why his father hid who he was from him. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel better? To feel safe? I just don’t want you to feel like you’re alone,” he offered.

Evie practically melted in his arms as he wrapped them around her, oh how she missed being so close to him. She did just the same, wrapping her arms around him as they shared more kisses. She knew it was a tough task for anyone to try and crack down walls that people put up, but knowing that he was willing to do that job with her and give her time was refreshing. When he pulled away she sat calmly in his arms, looking up at him with dreamy eyes. It was crazy to her how easily he could calm her, “But isn’t that bad for you? I can only imagine how weak you feel, it’s not healthy.” She had no idea if it was or wasn’t, but she hoped he wouldn’t continue to starve himself because of her, she was okay with him feeding off of others until she was ready for him to feed off of her. “Me too. There are so many other things we can do other than have sex. I know it’s important but...I think with time we’ll get there, there’s no rush.” She did feel a bit unworthy, knowing she couldn’t give him the one thing his species needed. “This. What you’re doing now, holding me. It all makes me feel better. I never thought I’d have this again, this feeling of safety and home. I didn’t even feel at peace with my own family, but for the first time in a long time I do, and it’s right here, right now,” she said, her eyes tearing up a bit as she spoke, still looking up at him as if he was the most beautiful being she’d laid eyes on.

It was such a familiar feeling for him. It was exactly how he remembered her feeling when wrapped around his arms. “It’s fine. It better this way. I don’t like that part of me. I don’t want ot have to feel like sex is for nourishment. It shouldn’t be. It should be about a connection,” he said with a shrug. That wasn’t a lie. He wanted to view sex as humans do. But more than that, he wanted to weaken that side of him. The last thing he wanted was to be seen as a sexual predator. It was why he was kicked out of his home and out of Athena’s life. It also led him to nearly rape someone. That wasn’t the type of man he wanted to be. “I’m glad you feel the same way. I will happily do other things with you,” he answered back. It was comforting even, that there wasn’t pressure to get physically intimate again. They needed to build things up again. Lucky for Evie, literally no one had wanted Zaki as anything more than a close friend after she had left, save for Abby which meant he was still open for a possible relationship. Zaki ran a hand through her dark hair, combing through it with his long ,thick fingers. “You don’t need to cry. We should be happy. I know you’ve been hurt, but I’m not going to allow that to happen with you here,” he tried to tell her, fighting back his own tears. Zaki cupped her cheek and rubbed his thumb against it to wipe one of her tears.

“I get that, but it’s what you’re supposed to do. It’s in your nature, you shouldn’t have to fight that. When I chose to love you I chose to love all of you, and I will continue to do that okay?” she said with a soft smile. “The good, the bad, and the ugly. Just like you’ve done for me.” She didn’t want him to pretend to be human, it wasn’t fair, she wanted him to be his authentic self. It was nice to feel him touch her again, those small moments, him running his hands through her hair, it was all so rewarding for her. She chuckled when he cupped her cheek again and wiped away her tears, “I’m not crying because I’m sad. It’s kind of a mixture of feelings I can’t explain. I just feel really lucky that you were still here. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I came, had those memories again and you were long gone. I’m happy that we’re here and that we’re starting over. That feeling of being at home was something I thought I could never have, and now I have hope that maybe I will know what that feels like.” She sniffled and shifted so she was closer to him, resting her head on his chest and taking her hand in hers, it was exactly where she wanted to be. Calm, safe, protected, and happy.

Zaki heard what she had to say. There was a part of him that understood what she said, that could make sense of it. But he was programed for 18 years of his life to hate who he was. His mother was pure evil, from all accounts, bent on hurting others and trying to harvest as many souls as she could to survive for at least another day. It wasn’t who he wanted to be, at all. “That means a lot. But to be a good man, I need to suppress that part of me. I -- I don’t think it’s possible to embrace that side of me, and be the father, the husband, the man I know I want to be,” he said with a shrug. Regardless, her words were incredibly comforting to him, as well as her soft, gentle touch. “There hasn’t been a single ugly thing you’ve done, Evie. Not in my opinion, anyway. I know you have a harsh exterior, but I know where it comes from. And you generally don’t give people a hard time to those who don’t deserve it,” the incubus added. Zaki was pretty tired. The last month or so, whenever it was that Evie returned, it had been rather draining for him, as it probably was for her as well. Zaki positioned himself on the couch, laying across it between Evie and the back of the couch, wrapping an arm around her.

Evie let out a soft sigh, she understood him, in some ways she felt similarly about herself. “As long as you’re happy and you aren’t hurting yourself, I’ll support you,” she replied. Though they were together all those years ago, Evie still didn’t know a lot about Zaki’s past, and she hoped eventually she’d be able to uncover it. “Sometimes I feel you think I can do no wrong, but I am human, I’ve made mistakes and decisions I am not happy with. But...that’s how you grow and learn. We all make mistakes, but as long as we accept we did wrong and prove we won’t make them again then we’re fine.” She felt the exhaustion hit her body almost instantly, she knew the adrenaline from earlier had kept her going as it usually did and now that she finally felt calm in his arms, her body was preparing itself for rest. She pulled his arm closer to her and nuzzled into him, “I think I’m just going to close my eyes for bit,” she muttered softly before she felt herself begin to drift off to sleep. He radiated warmth and made her feel like she could put her guard down. Evie hadn’t slept well in months, in constant fear of what was to come, but she could finally put all those thoughts to rest.

#evie #halloween

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destiel-love-forever · 5 years

Text

Just One Night

From my prompt challenge: Anon asked for 13 & 26 (Dystopian Society combined with "Spend the night with me... just one night.").

- This is set in a dystopian society - Kind of like Hunger Games but I haven’t read/watched those in forever so not really. The Games are a thing and are mentioned but aren’t in the story at all. The society is very oppressive and segregated. Different races/ethnicities are divided into the different districts. Sexual orientation/gender is forced to be the heterosexual/cisgender. Anyone who interacts with other races, participates in lgbtq sex acts/gender acts/etc. is put into the games - Castiel is a young man (18/19 ish) in the technology district. Dean is one of the high ranking government soldiers assigned to the district to keep things in order.

Available on AO3 here

The subtle crunch of gravel beneath Dean’s feet is a comfort to him by now, just like the heavy weight of the assault rifle in his hands. Since his promotion, he doesn’t get to go on patrols very often. He’s always bogged down with leadership shit. Lately, he’s been trying to hop on as many patrol shifts as possible, even if it means working all day and night. It soothes him to have his boots on the ground. To see his district.

He scans the area on a constant look, his eyes darting left to right. Nothing significant has happened in district three in months, when those two women were caught together. Dean’s best friend, and right hand man, Benny, was who caught them that night. He got upgraded from the barracks to his own government paid apartment as a reward. The two women will be in the games next month.

“Got laid last night,” Benny tells him as they walk side by side, boots creating a steady rhythm as they turn into their final neighborhood before they have to start their patrol route all over again.

“Oh, really?”

“Pretty little thing from the company down the street. She’s a security system developer.”

“Nice. She a good fuck?”

Benny gets distracted by a young boy in the usual district three blue shirt and a ratty pair of jeans. He’s playing with another boy his age and they’re holding hands as they run across the grass, giggling. When Dean realizes Benny’s heading toward them, he grabs his friend and tugs him back a step. “Harmless. They’re children.”

“Doesn’t mean they don’t know they’re fags. At that age I was already kissing girls, and thinkin’ of doing a lot more.”

“We’ll keep an eye on ‘em.” Dean keeps walking, his heart racing as he waits to see if Benny will join him. Dean’s his commanding officer, so he can order Benny to leave the boys alone, but that’d raise questions. It’s much better if Benny chooses to do it himself. He releases a puff of breath in relief when his friend leaves the two boys behind. Truth is, they do have feelings for each other. Dean saw them kissing last week in the forest, down at the fishing hole nearby. It had made him smile. He couldn’t get himself to take them into custody.

His heart barely has time to relax before the next wave of panic sets in. This time, it’s because they’re turning onto the street where Castiel Novak lives. The young man is a factory worker but receiving schooling to be an engineer. He wears blue shirts covered in oil most of the time, with a nice pair of black jeans that hug his ass beautifully. He has messy, curly hair that Dean bets is real soft. And incredible blue eyes that pop right out of his face, especially if he’s cleaned himself up and put on one of his nicer blue shirts, or his favorite blue sweater when it gets cold out. Beautiful. Every time Dean sees him, he worries a neon sign flashes above his head, letting Benny and everyone else know who he really is.

“Fuck, I need to piss,” Benny grumbles. Since the fucking universe hates Dean Winchester, Benny heads straight for Castiel’s house specifically, walking toward it with a purpose. They’re allowed to do whatever they please, mostly unchecked, as soldiers here. They can demand food. Shelter. Water. Bathrooms. Sex, though Dean isn’t a fan of that. He doesn’t believe in raping anyone, even if it’s technically legal. Thankfully Benny agrees on this one or Dean may not be able to work with the guy. Every girl his friend fucks is more than willing. Of course, that partly has to do with the fact that if they can get him to marry them, they win a ticket out of this hell hole and into the capital.

It’s late, after dinner, and Dean knows that Castiel will be there. He schools his expression and thinks of the last games, when he watched those two men in love have to fight for their lives. He refuses to be one of them. And shit, as a government employee, the capital would really make an example out of Dean. He’d be lucky if he even got to be in the games instead of some other form of punishment. Something extra to make sure the rest of the soldiers stay in line.

Besides, Castiel probably isn’t even gay. He’d be a dipshit if he was. Dean laughs softly to himself. As if it’s something Castiel could decide. He would be just as much stuck with it as Dean is, if he were to be gay. The government can say what they want, but it ain’t a choice. Lord knows Dean’s tried.

“Oh. Hello.” Castiel flinches when he sees the two men. His eyes flick over to Dean and Dean notices that he relaxes, as if Dean’s presence is preferable to Benny’s. That makes Dean nervous. As if Castiel can sense that he’s a traitor, that he’s a hypocrite.

“I need to piss. Move.”

“Ben,” Dean chides, giving his friend a dirty look.

Rolling his eyes, Benny still shoves past Castiel, but he at least mumbles, “Thanks.”

Dean rocks on his heels. Sometimes, the owner will invite him in too. Other times, they don’t want him in there. He’s unsure what will happen here but he thinks it’s best if he stays outside.

“Do you - uh,” Castiel tugs at his hair and Dean notices he’s in that pretty sweater. Dean’s favorite. The knitted one that looks soft and warm and is just a shade darker than his eyes, which makes them seem brighter than normal. “Do you need to go?”

“No. Thank you.”

“Are you thirsty or anything?”

Dean gives him a gentle smile. “I’m not like Benny. I can buy my own food and use public bathrooms. Thank you, though.”

“I’m inviting you. You aren’t taking advantage if I invite you.”

“Really. It’s okay.” Jesus, dude. Stop. I can already feel myself fucking falling in love with you. The last thing I need is entering your home.

“It’s freezing outside. It’s snowing. Come in.” Castiel reaches out like he’s going to grab Dean and pull him into the house but then his hand freezes and he gasps, realizing he was about to touch a soldier. Something like that would get him flogged in the town square.

Not wanting to make him afraid that he’s pissed, Dean nods and steps into the house. “Sure. Thank you.”

Since his boots are on and he doesn’t feel like taking them off, and he’s not an asshole like Benny who’s going to track slush through the whole fucking house, he stays in the small mud room.

“I have coffee. Or cocoa?” Castiel says quietly, much more shy now that he almost got himself into a shit ton of trouble.

Sensing that the guy needs to do something, Dean smiles and says, “Cocoa would be nice. Thank you.”

“I’ll, uh-” the man looks around his house and Dean wonders if he’s worried about leaving him alone to snoop. He wonders what there is to find. There’s almost always something, if you look hard enough. “I’ll be right back.”

“Okay.”

Dean checks his watch, grimacing when he sees that they’re already two minutes behind their patrol schedule. They’ll have to make the time up somehow. At least it’s only an hour or so until his shift is over. Then he can collapse in his government house up on the hill, the same hill where the barracks and apartments of the lower ranking soldiers are, where all the soldiers can live and look down on the little people in district three, and watch some TV while he drinks a beer. Or maybe some whiskey. Being near Castiel is making him need some whiskey.

When Benny returns, he gives Dean a strange look but says nothing about the fact that he entered the house. Dean very rarely does that. Only in emergencies.

“Ready, Winchester?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, wait!” Castiel hurries toward them with a travel mug of hot chocolate. “Sorry it took so long.”

Benny stares at the mug, then at Dean, an eyebrow raised in question.

“Hot chocolate. He made me some,” Dean tells him.

With a sharp nod, Benny glares at Castiel and asks, “Where’s mine?”

Castiel flinches and takes an instinctive step away from him. “Oh. I’m so sorry. I can make you some, sir. Just wait.”

“Don’t feel like waiting. It’s fine.”

All Dean has to say is a quiet, “Sergeant Laffitte,” and Benny is grumbling a “Thank you once again. Have a good night.”

Dean takes the coffee mug and promises to return it some time, a promise that makes Castiel’s eyes widen and his cheeks flush pink.

By the time Dean’s patrol shift is over, he’s nearly forgotten about Castiel all together. They dealt with a thief down at the bakery, a man who was caught beating his wife, and a little boy who threw rocks at his school building in protest of having to attend. The first one ended with the man getting his hand cut off. The second ended with a summons for flogging. The third ended in Benny and Dean trying damn hard not to laugh, because they’ve been there, and a stern scolding.

Dean gets inside his house and takes off his backpack, emptying it of his gear so he can clean and restock for the next day. That’s when he reaches in and grabs the silver travel mug he had stuffed in there once it was empty. He methodically brings it to the sink, washes it, and puts it back in his pack.

When he finally sits down with his whiskey and turns the TV on, he’s exhausted and jittery at the same time. It was the first time he got to interact with Castiel in a private setting like that. If Benny hadn’t been with him, he could have lingered. Drank the cocoa with him. Listened to his soft, grumbly voice. Kissed him.

Dean growls at himself and switches the channel to the capital’s new station specifically designated for news about The Broken- a term he hates, but prefers over The Fags as some still call them. An anchor is talking about the newest members to the games; a young man aged 21 from the seventh district and his lover, a man of 28 who was his neighbor. It shows them in chains being walked to the capitol building. People are throwing stones at them. Food. Shit. All Dean can focus on is how they’re almost within touching distance of each other. He watches as they keep giving each other looks. The younger one is hit in the head with a stone and nearly falls over, a soldier yanking him to his feet. Blood pours down the side of his face. His lover cocks his head and gives him a tight, comforting smile so full of love and comfort and meaning that Dean’s chest aches. Even now, as their world falls apart, as they’re sentenced to a month of torture before an almost certain death in the games, they can’t get themselves to stop loving each other.

What terrifies Dean is that for the first time in his life, watching this channel doesn’t make his urges stop. Instead, it makes him want to go to Castiel’s right now and kiss the hell out of him. What’s the point of living life anyway if it means you’ll never experience love like the men on the screen?

-------

Castiel has been watching Colonel Winchester since he was assigned to district three. The first time he saw the man, his breath literally caught in his throat. Two hours later, the Colonel was whipping a guy bloody, establishing his new reign over the district. The man being flogged was a gender traitor - a man who believed he was a woman, and dressed like one. After he was whipped by the Colonel, he was sent to the capital. He died a week later in the games.

Castiel spent months trying to convince himself to hate Colonel Winchester. He hasn’t seen him do anything like that since, which almost makes things worse in a way. It would be easier to hate the man if he had to watch him do those terrible things every day. Instead, though, Colonel Winchester is the guy behind the scenes. The one who decides what happens to who and when and where. Still worthy of hate, but harder to summon inside Castiel.

Then, last week, Castiel saw the Colonel catch two little boys kissing. Castiel had been out picking berries near the fishing hole when he saw the boys. Before he could tell the boys to stop that and be more careful, a noise to his right had him hiding behind a fallen tree. He had watched as Colonel Winchester stood just feet away from the boys, who were too busy to notice someone watching them from the edge of the trees. It had taken everything in him not to shout for the boys to run so they could maybe have a chance to be saved.

But then the Colonel had turned his back to the boys and walked away like he saw nothing. The weirdest part? He was smiling to himself. It made Castiel both afraid and thrilled. He was flooded with a million questions. The moment Colonel Winchester stepped into his house yesterday, he wanted to attack him with question after question. It took everything he had to stay quiet.

Castiel’s surprised he even survived the day without getting himself killed in the factory, since his mind was so distracted by finally getting a chance to see the Colonel up close. He was even more beautiful than he was from afar. He has freckles. Thousands of individual freckles. And his eyes are green. From a distance, they seemed hazel, but up close they’re a brilliant green.

And there was a desire in the way he looked at Castiel. A desire he wanted to pursue more than anything.

God, you’re such a fucking idiot, Castiel. He’d murder you if you ever pursued him. He’d get your ass thrown in the games - or worse.

A knock on Castiel’s door distracts him from his worried thoughts. Knowing it’s probably Martha, the old lady that lives next door and is constantly asking him for one thing or another to borrow, he doesn’t bother to make himself presentable. He’s just gotten out of the shower, so he swaggers to the door in nothing but his soft gray sweatpants, avoiding putting a blue shirt on for as long as possible. He’s fucking sick of that color. Sick of being told what has to be on his torso. He hates his own eyes, can’t even look in the mirror anymore, because they're blue.

With a friendly smile, he opens the door and prepares himself for Martha. The last thing he expected to find was Colonel Winchester standing in his doorway. In his casual uniform, the one he wears around the district when not actively patrolling, holding Castiel’s travel mug. Castiel gasps and steps back, wrapping his arms around his torso.

“I’m so sorry. I was, uh- I was expecting someone else. Sorry.”

“Lady friend coming by?”

“No.” When the Colonel’s eyebrows raise, Castiel hurries, “I mean, not a guy either. No guy. I’m not - no guy. My neighbor. Martha. She’s the old lady. Always comin’ to bother me.”

Colonel Winchester smirks. “Calm down. Not an interrogation. Just came to bring this back to ya and say thanks.”

“Oh. Great. Yeah.”

“It was delicious.”

“Thanks. My mom’s recipe.” Castiel nibbles on his bottom lip. He’s trying not to stare at how gorgeous the man is, but he’s worried if he avoids looking at him too much then he’ll look suspicious. And like the idiot that he is, he finds himself making things much worse by saying, “Come in. I could make more.”

Colonel Winchester chuckles. “Actually, if you have some coffee, I’d kill for some. It’s been a long day.”

“Yeah. Of course. I can make some coffee.” Castiel moves out of the way, letting the Colonel walk in. He watches in amazement as the man removes his boots and his uniform jacket. Now, he’s just in plain black pants and a black shirt that hugs his muscles in all the right ways. There’s something about him being comfortable like that in Castiel’s house that makes Castiel shiver.

Trying to hide his shaking hands, Castiel shoves them into his pant pockets and leads Dean into the kitchen. “I’ll just start a pot. Then I can throw a shirt on quick.”

“Doesn’t bother me,” Dean drawls.

“Oh.” Castiel fills the coffee pot with water, shaking harder now. Is he imagining the heat in Dean’s voice? The desire? Should he put the shirt on anyway? Is this a test? Does staying shirtless prove he’s gay?

He turns the coffee pot on and faces the Colonel. The man is leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. It makes his biceps bulge against the tight fabric of his shirt. Castiel wants to rip it to shreds and kiss every fucking inch of the exposed body beneath. He’s only ever had a love interest once; when he was seventeen. It lasted two months and they were awkward and clumsy and they got way too nervous and ended things before any real love developed between them. Still, though, it provided him with enough of a past to be able to picture a fairly detailed fantasy starring the Colonel.

Then Castiel sees the gun attached to the Colonel’s hip and remembers the danger. He licks his dry lips and meets the man’s eyes. The Colonel definitely knows what he was thinking. Definitely. He can see it in the way his green eyes have narrowed, his pink lips tilting into a smirk. Castiel tenses up.

“I - uh, you’re-” Castiel clenches his fists, trying hard not to whimper in fear. “Just looking at your - uh - your clothes. You look different - ya know - out of uniform.”

All the man does is chuckle softly. Castiel keeps rambling, trying to save his fucking life with every word. “I like girls. I have a girlfriend. Well, had. We broke up. But not because I’m gay! Just-”

“Castiel. Relax.” The Colonel walks forward until he’s only hovering an inch or two away from him. He reaches out and runs a hand along Castiel’s arm, watching intently to see his reaction. Castiel tries like hell but he can’t stop the shiver that rushes through his body, and the soft breath he exhales right after. “You haven’t had a girlfriend, have you, Castiel?”

“I would never lie to you, Colonel Winchester. I swear.”

“Dean. Please.” The man smiles, his hand skimming along Castiel’s bare arm again. “Call me Dean.”

“Dean.” Castiel closes his eyes, a tear leaking out of one. “I swear. Please. I’m not - I swear. Please. Don’t -”

“Don’t touch you? You really don’t want me to touch you?”

“Please,” Castiel chokes on a sob. “Please. I’m not gay, Sir. I swear.”

Lips close over his mouth and Castiel gasps. For a brief moment, he melts. Then his eyes shoot open. Dean’s eyes are closed, like he doesn’t know that Castiel is panicking. He tears his face away, crying even harder now. This is a sick game. He doesn’t like it one bit. “Please. You kissed me! You kissed me! I didn’t kiss you. Please. I’m not-”

“You are.” Dean wipes the tears from Castiel's cheek and tilts his head. “I am too.”

Castiel stares at him in pure confusion. “You’re what?”

“Gay.”

“But - you can’t - I mean - you’re a Colonel.”

“Yup. I think you know just as much as I do that it’s not exactly something you can turn on and off.”

Castiel wipes at his face with a rough hand and places his other hand on Dean’s chest, carefully pushing him away. “I want you to leave. Please.”

Dean’s eyes flash. “It’s okay, Castiel. You won’t get in trouble.”

“Leave. Now.”

He watches as Dean’s jaw ticks. His body begins to shake again and despite his best efforts, more tears leak from his eyes. When Dean looks at him, he can see pain and worry on the man’s face. “Cas, hey. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have - I’m sorry. Please don’t tell anyone.”

“I won’t. I swear.”

“Okay.” Dean backs away from him, his face bright red. “I apologize again, Castiel. Have a good night.”

“Yeah. Uh - good night.”

The second he hears his door close, Castiel slumps to the floor of his kitchen and begins to sob.

Either he proved that he is in fact gay, because Castiel’s pretty fucking sure he accidently kissed Dean back at first, and now Dean has evidence to report him, or he proved that he isn’t but Dean is gay, and now Castiel is a liability for knowing. Either scenario ends with Castiel in the games, or worse. No one will believe him if he says Dean came onto him. Why would they? Dean’s a fucking Colonel. He’s nothing.

He’s convinced he’ll wake up to the soldiers coming for him. He’ll wake up to Dean standing in the doorway, grinning. Maybe even laughing. Castiel cries himself to sleep, wrapped up in his favorite knitted sweater, shaking violently.

------

Fucking idiot. That’s what you are, Dean. A fucking idiot. Dean avoids Castiel’s house for a week, returning to his paperwork and his office. Hiding. He waits every day for the guy to report him. He has a strong feeling that Castiel wouldn’t. One, he really does think the young man is gay too, he just thinks he’s too paranoid to give into Dean. Two, he’s pretty sure his commanders would believe him over Castiel, which would get Castiel at least thrown into the games for treason, if not killed outright.

Still, he’s panicking.

Then Benny is fucking sick on Saturday and Dean has to do his patrol shift. He grits his teeth every time he walks by Castiel’s house, forcing himself not to look in that direction. Forcing himself to act as if nothing ever happened.

A snow storm begins just before midnight, when Chuck comes to relieve Dean. Dean shakes off some of the snow that’s accumulated on his shoulders and head and starts his trek back home. Usually he’d drive down to the district but he had wanted more time walking today. He needed it to think. As he walks the final time past Castiel’s house, a voice calls to him. He whips around at the sound of his first name to find Castiel standing on the sidewalk in nothing but a sweater and jeans.

Dean glances around before slowly walking toward him. “Mr. Novak?”

“Can you, uh, can you come inside, Colonel? I need to report a break in.”

It takes Dean a second, but then he catches on. “Of course. Lead the way.”

Castiel leads him inside, his eyes fixed on the rifle in his hands. Dean didn’t have it last time and he can tell that it’s making Castiel nervous. That’s why, even though it’s pretty much rule number fucking one, Dean puts his rifle down right away. Then he takes off his boots and shrugs out of his uniform jacket. It feels good to take off the heavy, armored jacket.

When he looks at Castiel, he shakes his head in disapproval. The boys cheeks and nose are bright pink from the cold and he’s shivering hard enough to make his teeth clatter. “You should have had a jacket on,” Dean scolds.

“I saw you coming and hurried out.”

“How’d you know my shift was over?”

Castiel looks away. “You were moving in the opposite direction, meaning you were headed home instead of patrolling.”

A fluttery feeling warms the center of Dean’s stomach at the idea that Castiel pays that much attention to him. “Did you really have a break in, Castiel?”

“No.” Castiel steps closer to him, looking up at him through his lashes. “Are you really gay, Dean?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Castiel lifts himself up on his toes and grabs Dean’s face, kissing him hard. For a few seconds Dean allows him to do this before taking back the control. He crashes him into the nearest wall and immediately grabs his thighs, yanking him up so his legs wrap around his waist. He pins Castiel to the wall with his hips so he can use his hands to tug at his messy hair and kiss him even harder.

When he breaks for a gasp of air, he finds Castiel staring up at him with wide eyes full of wonder. “What?” Dean asks with a soft laugh.

“You.” Castiel cups his face. The way he holds him, like he’s fragile and beautiful, does something to Dean’s chest that he both hates and loves. “This is bad. We could get in trouble.”

“Yes. We could.” Dean presses a single kiss to Castiel’s lips before whispering. “So worth it.”

Even though they’re talking about the possibility of death, or even worse, Castiel finds himself nodding in agreement, breathlessly saying, “Yeah. Worth it.”

-----

Castiel paces in front of his door a week after their first kiss. Dean’s come over every night that week, usually around two or three in the morning, when no one would be paying attention. It means that Castiel is exhausted every day at work but he doesn’t care in the least. They’ve kissed so much he feels like his lips permanently belong to Dean Winchester, and he’s hoping like hell that tonight they do more.

Even though it’s just after two, Castiel has food in the oven and candles lit and a bottle of wine out. When he hears the knock on his door, he’s nearly giddy. It takes a lot of self control not to tackle Dean the moment the door opens.

“Hey you,” Dean whispers in a low voice as he pushes inside. He’s in faded blue jeans and a hooded sweatshirt with a leather jacket over it. Castiel has decided that he loves this version of Dean most. The comfortable, attractive, kind man who can make him laugh so hard it hurts. Who makes him feel special.

“Hey.” Castiel wraps his arms around Dean’s neck and gets on his toes to reach his lips. They kiss long and slow, like it’s been more than a day since they last saw each other. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, blue eyes.”

Castiel rolls those eyes of his and huffs, “I hate my eyes.”

“I know. But I love them.” Dean reaches into his back pocket with a grin. “Speaking of, though, I have a present for you.”

“A present?”

“Yup.” Dean pulls out a shirt and shakes it out so Castiel can see the whole thing hanging from his hands. It’s a maroon colored shirt with long sleeves. When Dean hands it to him, he feels the fabric and can’t stop himself from smiling. It’s soft. Incredibly soft. And faded, like Dean’s worn it often. “It’ll be big on you, since you’re all tiny and cute and short, but it should be comfortable. And, well, it’s not blue. Figured you might appreciate that.”

Castiel gulps, tears burning his eyes. “Dean. You can’t - this can’t -”

“I know when the raids are going to be on houses, Cas. I’m the one that plans them. I’ll make sure to take it back before the next one happens for you. You won’t get caught with it, I promise. Keep it.”

Clenching the fabric in his hands, Castiel grins up at him, nearly bouncing on his damn feet. “I love it. I love it so much Dean. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He pulls him in close and presses a gentle kiss to his lips. “Do I smell food?”

“I made you pie. It should be ready to take out, actually.”

“Fuck yeah. Is it apple?”

Castiel laughs. He knows that’s Dean’s favorite. He told Castiel all about his childhood and his mom’s cooking, especially her apple pie. There’s no way Castiel’s food is as good as hers but it’ll hopefully be good enough.

Dean pauses when they get into the kitchen, squeezing Castiel’s hand he’s holding. “Wine?”

“Uh, yeah.” Castiel clears his throat, unsure how Dean will feel about that. “My dad kept a few bottles hidden when the initial raids happened. Before the big war.”

“Cas, don’t waste one of those on me.”

“It isn’t a waste. I was,” Castiel pauses, nervously fiddling with the shirt in his hands. “I was hoping tonight could be special.”

“Special?”

“Well, you don’t work tomorrow, and neither do I. I thought, maybe, you could,” Castiel gulps. “Spend the night?”

Dean’s eyebrows raise as high as possible. “No.”

“But-”

“I’ll stay longer if you want, and we can do whatever you want, but not that. I can’t stay here.”

Since he knew that was a long shot, Castiel drops it. “Okay, then. Let’s just eat.”

-----

Dean rolls Castiel onto his back, kissing him with a nice open mouth, running his tongue along the interior of it. He tastes like pie. Fucking delicious. He pulls away long enough to tear Castiel’s shirt over his head. Then his own. Castiel drags his nails down his back, making Dean groan, then shiver.

They both tense when Castiel’s fingers skim the cold metal of the gun tucked into the back of Dean’s jeans. He doesn’t bring his rifle when he’s off duty like this, but he always brings his pistol. Castiel’s seen it once or twice in flashes but he’s never touched it.

“Sorry,” Castiel whispers, drawing his hand away.

“No, I’m sorry. Shoulda taken it off.” Dean reaches back, pulling the gun out and placing it on the coffee table, the muzzle pointing in the opposite direction of them.

Castiel can’t stop staring at the gun while Dean kisses his way down his neck and chest. He wonders how many people Dean has killed with it, or with any other gun. And how many more Dean has sentenced to death, to be killed by someone else with Dean’s name stamped on it with approval.

“We should go upstairs,” Castiel whispers, still staring at the gun.

“What?”

“Upstairs. Bed.”

Dean shakes his head, starting to get off him. “No, Castiel. I said no sleep overs.”

“Not to sleep, idiot.” Castiel gets up too and grabs his hand, practically yanking him toward the stairs. “I’m tired of just kissing.”

All the blood in Dean’s body runs south. “Yes. Good. Let’s go.”

They practically tumble into the bed together. The last of their clothes comes off in a frantic need to feel skin against skin. Dean shudders the moment they’re down to just boxers, moving his hips in a slow circle, desperate to feel his hard cock against his without all the fabric in the way.

“Have you ever?” Dean asks, shaking hands holding him up so he doesn’t put too much weight on Castiel.

“No.” Castiel nibbles his bottom lip. “I’ve done other stuff, but not that.”

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

“Oh, I want to. Have,” Castiel looks away, blushing. “Have you?”

Dean leans more weight on one hand so he can lift the other, grabbing Castiel’s face and turning it so they’re looking into each other’s eyes. “Yes. With woman. I’ve watched porn, though. Think I can figure it out.”

Castiel’s eyes go as wide as saucers. “How did you find gay porn?”

Laughing, Dean winks at him. “We find some in raids every once in a while. If I get a chance, I swipe it. Take it home.”

“Holy crap. I wanna see some!”

“Psssh, trust me, I’ll be even better. Let me show you.”

Nodding, Castiel relaxes again. Dean pulls a condom and a mini bottle of lube out of his back pocket. He goes slow, kissing Castiel breathless while he preps him. By the time his cock is sinking into Castiel, they're both already on the edge.

“Fuck you feel good,” Dean whispers.

“Better than the girls you've been with?”

“Much better.” Dean presses a kiss to his lips, then smiles down at him. “You're the real thing, so it's perfect.”

With a shiver, Castiel grabs his face and kisses him again. And again. And again. As the kiss heats up, becoming a flurry of lips and teeth and tongues, Dean's hips move faster and harder. When he feels himself getting close, he wraps a calloused hand around Castiel's cock and starts to pump it in time with his thrusts.

Castiel's back bows off the bed as he comes without meaning to. It feels like Dean tore it from him. A few seconds later, Dean is finishing too.

Dean cleans them up enough for now, then grabs Castiel and holds him to his chest. They lay in a sweaty, breathless heap for a long time. The silence is comfortable at first but Castiel's mind starts to spin, and then the quiet is suffocating.

When Dean leans down at one point to kiss him, Castiel stops him by turning his face away. He can feel his cheeks heating up because he hates feeling vulnerable, but he also needs to protect his heart. This is something he can be killed for. Stoned in the streets. Publicly flogged. Put into the games. He doesn’t know if Dean would get an easier punishment because of his government position, or a harsher one to make an example out of him, but either way, this isn’t something to take lightly.

“I love you, Dean,” he admits on a choked breath.

Taking a chance, he looks up at Dean through his lashes. Instead of tensing or panicking like Castiel expected, Dean gives him a slow smile and whispers, “I love you too, Castiel.”

“Really?”

“Really. Very much so.”

“Good.” Castiel takes in a deep, shaking breath and braces himself. Somehow, he’s more nervous for this than he was for admitting his love. “Spend the night with me.. Just one night.”

That’s when the tensing and panicking begins. Dean’s eyes skate away, looking over at the wall. “You know I can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“You know why not.”

“You can still leave before sunrise. We can set an alarm.”

Dean scoffs. “Sunrise is in like two hours, Cas.”

“Then a different night. Come earlier than you usually do and spend the night. Just one night with me, Dean. That’s all I’m asking.”

“It’s not, though. Because once I do that, you’ll ask again. And again. And I won’t be able to say no because you’re like my fucking weakness. Then one lazy mistake from getting too comfortable and we’re both dead. Or worse.”

“Then we should just end this. Call it off. If it’s not going anywhere, then what’s the point? The longer we keep doing this, we keep pretending, the more it’ll hurt when it’s over.”

Dean gets to his feet and begins to pace, scratching the back of his head. “So, what? This is an ultimatum? I spend the night tonight or we’re done?”

Wiping his tears, Castiel sits up and curls in on himself. “No ultimatum. It’s already over. I want this to be over. I want you to leave.”

“Cas.”

“Please.”

Dean stands in place, staring at him in disbelief. He does this for a full minute while Castiel sits in the same spot and falls apart. When Castiel releases his first sob, Dean swears under his breath. He storms downstairs, Castiel following behind even though it hurts worse to actually watch Dean leaving. Dean grabs his pistol and shoves it into the waistband of his jeans, then yanks his shirt on. He gives Castiel one more look before shaking his head and leaving.

The sharp thud of the door closing echoes inside Castiel’s empty chest. He grabs the shirt Dean brought him as a gift and hurries to pull it over his body instead of the blue one he was wearing before. He locks the doors, shuts the lights off, and crawls into his bed beneath the blankets. He starts to cry again when he realizes the shirt smells like Dean; like he wore it before giving it to Castiel.

How was he going to survive without Dean? What was the point?

-----

Dean survives nine days without Castiel. He never patrols. He never goes out into the public. He never leaves his home. He pushes paperwork and answers calls and sentences three people to a public flogging without ever even seeing their faces or hearing their sides of the story. He hates himself every second. He hates this society. He hates the government. He hates his job. He hates his soldiers. He hates Benny. He hates himself some more.

He hates himself so fucking much.

On day ten, he sneaks out of his house just after midnight. He takes the back way into the district to avoid being spotted. He knows everyone’s patrol routes and where all the cameras are, so as long as everyone is doing their job properly, he won’t get caught.

His entire body is violently shaking by the time he’s at Castiel’s door. It’s locked. He pulls out his ring of keys and grabs the master key to the district. Every door in this entire district, even private homes, can be unlocked with this key. Only Dean and the President of Panem has it. It’s an extreme abuse of power to let himself into Castiel’s house, but he’s so far gone it doesn’t matter. All he knows is he has to see him. Now.

The lights are off but he finds Castiel still awake, tucked into the corner of the couch with Dean’s baggy maroon shirt on. He stares at the blank TV like there’s actually something playing on the screen.

Dean clears his throat, letting Castiel know he’s not alone. The man slightly perks up and looks over the back of the couch at Dean. His eyes widen but he says nothing.

That’s okay. Dean has his speech planned.

“I’m an idiot for ever even considering a life without you. I shouldn’t have left that night, and I’m not leaving tonight. We’re going to figure out how to do this. I don’t care if I have to start a fucking revolution for you. I don’t care if we have to run away. Live in hiding. Me and you, together, is all I want. It’s the most alive I’ve ever felt.”

“Dean-”

“There was this couple one day, when this first started with us. I watched them on TV as they were marched to the capital. Even with everything being thrown and screamed at them, even though they knew they were literally marching to their death, they were still so in love. You could see it in the way they looked at each other. Like they’d rather be there together than somewhere else alone. It was a nice concept at the time I watched it. Something that made me smile. Something that made me wonder. But now, I understand”

“Dean-”

“If you me want to go, I’ll go. I’ll never hold my power over you. I swear it. When it comes to us, we’re on equal ground. But you’ll have to tell me to go, because I’m never leaving on my own again. I’m never leaving you. I love you, Castiel. I love you so fucking much. So, if you’ll allow it, I want to be with you.”

Castiel can’t get off the couch fast enough. He launches himself at Dean, wrapping his arms and legs around him, clinging like a damn spider monkey. He buries his face in the crook of his neck and drags his lips along the curve. “I’ve missed you so much. I love you.”

“I missed you too,” Dean whispers against his temple. “God, I love you.”

“Spend the night with me.. Just one night,” Castiel pleads, afraid of the answer despite Dean’s speech.

Pulling away to look Castiel in the eyes, Dean shakes his head. “Not just one night, Cas. As often as possible.”

#destiel #alternate universe #dystopian society #homophobic society #slurs #racism #sexism #homophobia #slow build #prompt #prompt challenge

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xvii852g7 · 5 years

Text

Miracle | Jinyoung

Pairing: jinyoung x reader

Genre: Fluff (really bad)

Words: 3.7k+

Prompts: “and right there you thought, maybe just maybe, your christmas might not be so lonely this year.” + “thank you for being my miracle this christmas.”

A/N: honestly really late for a christmas imagine but hey everyone has time for some fluff.

GIF IS NOT MINE

——————♔ ——————

it was a week before christmas when you moved into a new house. the previous house you had was very old and the facilities could barely be used. the shower head always spurt out mud, the walls had many cracks in it and the lights would always go off every now and then making it very inconvenient for you. especially when you’re in university.

you always had school till evening and your night shift at a restaurant to pay for your school fees and rent. it was stressful for you and finally you had found a much better house. it was bigger than your previous house but you paid off the sum of house, now able to save more money since you didn’t need to pay rent.

the floor only had two apartments which was much quieter and you hoped you managed to get a nice neighbour which you did. he was an idol, out before the sun rises and back after the sun sets. you rarely saw him but when you did, you would always greet him.

he had very beautiful eyes and a kind smile, never failing to make your heart flutter. he was very attractive, you always found him. you never had time to find out more about his group or had the time to search them up. you either forgot or was busy. you only knew his name was jinyoung.

now, it was three days before christmas and your house looked as dull as ever. your boss had given you a week off since you were always on night shift. it was christmas break as well so you had finally had time to yourself. but you weren’t a festive person.

ever since your parents left, you never celebrated christmas. you barely had friends since you weren’t a social person. you only had yourself and that made you feel quite lonely. only when you had time to yourself though.

you sighed upon seeing the dull house, not motivated to decorate it. you didn’t had a reason to anyways. you had no one to celebrate christmas with and you hated going out, especially during winter.

taking the watering can, you stepped out of your house to water your plants. as you did, the lift door opened and you looked up to see who it was.

jinyoung exited the lift and bowed the first thing he saw you. you bowed back, smiling a little. “hello.” he greeted and you did the same.

“christmas break?” you asked and he nodded, chuckling. your smile widened.

“you too?” he asked and you nodded.

“ah i see.” jinyoung answered, “will you be going back to visit your family for christmas?” he then asked.

mentioning your family made your heart clench a little. managing to keep a smile, you shook your head. “no, they’re all over the world now.” you even manage to add a little giggle through your lie.

“oh but you’ll be spending christmas with your friends right?” he continued to ask.

“yeah i guess.” you continued to lie, not wanting him to pity you if you said you didn’t have any family or friends. “you’re gonna spend time with your family?” you then asked, changing the topic to him.

“no, sadly. three days is too short and the boys are coming over to my house for christmas this year. they were making a fuss about how they never saw my house.” jinyoung explained and you nodded, chuckling at the mention of his team mates.

“i see. well have a merry christmas.” you wished and he did the same. the both of you went back to your houses but you had a bright smile on your face. you were glad that you had the chance to talk to the busy idol even if it was for awhile.

—————————— ♔ ——————————

jinyoung had always found you interesting. from the day you moved in, you had no idea who he was and you were always in the same oversized white tee and sports shorts. he soon came to realise that you didn’t care about fashion, always seeing you come back from school in just hoodies and jeans. it was like your school attire.

he liked how simple you lived even though he barely managed to talk to you. he caught a glimpse of your house once as he was entering his house. it seemed simple. just a couch and a coffee table. that’s what he saw anyways.

when you talked about celebrating christmas, he felt there was something off. he could tell you weren’t in the christmas mood but he didn’t want to question it.

jinyoung shook the thought of it as he entered the grocery store the next day. it was now 2 days closer to christmas and he had to stock up the fridge with drinks and his house with food since the boys were coming.

as he approached the counter with his trolley full of goods, the cashier smiled. “aren’t you the lovely boy who lives at XXX apartment?” jinyoung nodded, answering a yes with a smile.

“i heard a new girl just moved in. i live there too actually and i heard that the new girl moved cause her parents passed away. they say she didn’t want to remember her parents so she moved. quite sad ain’t it. the poor girl studies and works till dawn, unable to make any friends as well.” the cashier rambled as she scanned the items, adding a sigh. “i wonder how she’s spending christmas.”

jinyoung listened, a little shocked but realised why she seemed so down for christmas. he felt a little bad for her and the thought of inviting her to spend christmas with the boys came across his mind but dismissed immediately when the cashier had asked him to pay.

as he carried the bags back home, he started to wonder if you would say yes to spending christmas with him and the boys. the boys wouldn’t mind and he certainly wouldn’t. but the question of why he was so open to practically a stranger came to mind.

he wondered if it was because he felt bad for the girl or that he actually had an interest in her. it made him wonder and he went for the first option even though he knew the second reason explained why.

the thought of asking her to celebrate christmas dismissed once he received a phone call from his family. he spent the rest of the day talking to his family, only remembering what he had to ask late at night.

—————————— ♔ ——————————

it was now a day closer to christmas and you were still at home watching how the grinch stole christmas. it was your favourite christmas show because the grinch was literally your mood when it came to christmas.

well, you didn’t exactly hate christmas but you had no meaning to it so you mostly became like the grinch. annoyed at the christmas spirit. you sighed when you realised you had already finished your third cup of ice cream and groaned upon realising that you had finished your last tub.

just as you got up the couch, the doorbell rang. your eyebrows furrowed, wondering who it was since no one knew where you lived. you opened the door cautiously, peeking your head out to see who it was and realised it was jinyoung.

he stood there in his purple sweater and a scarf around his neck, a bag in his hand as well. despite the weird fashion, you still found him extremely attractive.

jinyoung smiled and greeted you a good afternoon, you did the same.

“what brings you here?” you asked, opening the door a little more so you could stand comfortably. jinyoung awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, unsure of what to say.

“well, i wanted to invite you to spend christmas with the boys and i since you’re probably spending it alone.” he said and you looked at him with curious eyes. you were pretty sure you told him you were meeting your friends for christmas, why did he suddenly know that you were spending christmas alone.

“the lady at the grocery store told me.” he added and everything fell into place. you rolled your eyes at the nosy lady at the store.

“of course the lady at the grocery store. that big mouth.” you groaned and jinyoung chuckled.

“this is for you too. i didn’t know what flavour you’d like so i got my favourite. i hope you don’t mind.” he continued, handing you the bag with a tub of ice cream.

your eyes lit up at the sight of ice cream, now wondering if jinyoung was an angel sent from above. he sure did look like one. you received it with great thanks and smiled brightly. jinyoung smiled when he noticed how happy you were when you saw the bag of ice cream.

“oh and don’t think i’m doing it out of pity, i just want you to have a memorable christmas. it’s that one time of the year where warmth and joy is all around, i didn’t want you to not feel that. you don’t have to give me an answer now, just come over if you want. the boys won’t mind and i certainly would love to have you over.” he made himself clear and with that, he bowed and entered his house.

you held the ice cream in your hands and you smiled, feeling the warmth you haven’t felt in a very long time. it almost felt foreign. you closed the door and happily skipped to the kitchen, refilling your bowl with the ice cream jinyoung bought you. what a coincidence, he liked the same flavour as you did.

and right there you thought, maybe just maybe, your christmas might not be so lonely this year.

—————————— ♔ ——————————

christmas finally decided to roll in and you were surprisingly awake in the morning. drinking the hot chocolate you made yourself, you were still thinking if you should accept jinyoung’s invitation to spend christmas with the boys. after all, he did make an effort to buy you ice cream and personally invite you over a day before christmas.

the warm chocolate ran down your throat, warming your body and putting you into a nice mood. putting down the cup, you decided that you shall accept jinyoung’s warm invitation and go to the gathering.

you sighed in distress, wondering what to wear. should you wear something comfortable or should you wear something more formal. you didn’t understand the fuss you put yourself through when it was just a simple dinner next door.

in the end, you decided with a cute reindeer hand woven sweater and a pair of tights. contented with your choice, you decided to go to his house earlier to help out with anything he needed help with. that, however, was more of an excuse. you just wanted to spend more time with him before the boys arrive.

you knocked nervously on the door, fiddling with the paws of your sweater. you wondered if he was awake or did you wake him up when he answered the door with messy bed hair and half-lidded eyes.

“oh did i disturb you?’ you sheepishly asked and he smiled when he noticed it was you, shaking his head.

"not at all. i’ve woken up for awhile.” you didn’t know if he was telling the truth because his voice was definitely deeper than usual, making him sound sexier. not that you mind.

you nodded and told him that you wanted to help him out if he needed, to thank him for the ice cream. he happily welcomed you to his house, closing the door behind him. his living room felt very welcoming if there was a way to express it.

you admired his house before turning to him, taking a good look at him. he indeed look like he just woke up. from his hair to his navy blue sweater and striped pyjama pants, you chuckled at how cute he looked. totally different from his usual blue jeans and tight shirts.

“so, what do you need help with?” you asked, smiling warmly at him.

“hm, there’s nothing much to help with the decoration but i’d have to cook dinner later so i probably need help for that. right now, we can watch a movie?” he suggested and you nodded, wondering when you had gotten this close to watching a movie with him. in his house. jinyoung found it strange that he had asked you to watch a movie with him.

the both of you settled down on the couch, two cups of hot chocolate on the table and the beginning of ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’ started. yes, you had suggested the same movie you watched yesterday because jinyoung said he had never seen it. now you both were watching it on the television connected from his computer.

somehow halfway through the movie, you found yourself snuggled up with jinyoung. his arm was around your waist and your head was laying on his chest. it was a comfortable position and that made you feel really warm. your heart was palpitating fast and you could hear jinyoungs’ one was as well.

the movie ended soon enough and now only the beating of the two hearts could be heard. you cleared your throat and was about to pull away from jinyoung but he pulled you back. “let’s stay like this for awhile.” he simply said and you agreed, laying back on his chest.

the comfortable silence between you two made you feel a little sleepy, proving how comfortable you were. you loved it and you definitely wished for this to last. jinyoung, on the other hand, was looking admirably at you. how your breathing was steady and how your eyes glimmered under the soft lights. beautiful, he thought of you. you looked liked an art piece, perfect and flawless.

surprisingly within an hour, the both of you had gotten the food placed neatly and nicely on the dinning table. there was roasted turkey (which you managed to make really fast), mashed potato, salad and pasta. it was simple dishes yet it made the dining table look filled and festive.

on time, the doorbell rang and you took jinyoung’s apron, hanging it on the side of the kitchen. you heard the boys greeting jinyoung loudly and you awkwardly adjusted your outfit, nervously taking in deep breaths.

and finally, you had eye contact with the six boys who walked into the kitchen.

“oh and who is this jinyoung?” a fairly tall male with super skinny legs asked, wiggling his eyebrows at jinyoung.

jinyoung hit the man and walked over to your side. “boys, this is y/n. y/n, this is yugyeom, bambam, jackson, youngjae, jaebum and mark.” he introduced and you bowed shyly, mentioning it was nice to meet you. they did the same.

“so, are you both dating or?” jaebum asked, eyeing the both of you. heat immediately rose to your cheeks and jinyoung’s one as well.

you watched as jinyoung whisper into jaebum’s ear and a cheeky smile rose to his lips. “ah i see, okay let’s eat then."

the rest of the boys looked at them curiously, making a fuss on wanting to know what jinyoung had told the leader. you were in no exception but you didn’t want to pursue the issue. the boys and you settled down at the dining table, you sitting in-between jinyoung and youngjae.

thankfully, you got along really well with the boys and you found yourself laughing at jackson’s petty behaviour soon enough. jinyoung was glad you got along well with his bandmates and found himself smiling adoringly at you every time you smiled.

not long after the dishes were done, the eight of you sat in front of the christmas tree talking about the fun times they had together as a group. despite the fact that you did not know them, you felt like you were apart of them already. they were really warm and nice to you, talking to you as if they knew you for a really long time. you actually felt like you were spending christmas with your family.

"you should really see jinyoung’s pants, it was hideous.” bambam pointed out halfway through the conversations of airport fashion. the whole group laughed except for jinyoung who glared at bambam. jackson whipping out his phone to find the picture and showed it to you, earning a loud laugh from you. jinyoung managed to crack a smile at you despite being annoyed at jackson who showed the picture.

the boys noticed and cooed at him, teasing the male. “someone’s in love~” youngjae teased and jinyoung raised his hand, wanting to hit him. you, on the other hand, giggled and looked way. not denying the fact because you knew you had fallen for the angel right next to you.

“okay everyone, PRESENT TIME!” yugyeom yelled, getting up to take his bag that had presents for the other 6. the others did the same and only you, who last minute joined the gathering, had nothing so you stood and watch.

you unconsciously smiled at the scene in front of you. the boys were happily exchanging presents and the warm smiles present on their faces were so heartwarming, exactly like how a family would spend christmas.

suddenly, you felt someone hold your hand and you jumped turning to see who it was. it was jinyoung who was looking at you with a shy smile. he held a small box that was wrapped in christmas wrapper. you looked at him, confused as he handed you the box.

“it’s for you,” he said as you took the box into your own hand. “open it.” he told you and you did. you carefully tore the wrapper away and in it was a blue box lined with gold at the side. you opened it and eyed jinyoung as you did.

in it laid a beautiful silver necklace with a christmas tree as the charm. the diamonds the christmas tree represented the ornaments. you gasped as your hands grazed over the chains. “jinyoung,” you started. “you didn’t have to."

"but i wanted to.” he replied, taking the necklace out. you turned around and held your hair as jinyoung placed the necklace over your neck. you felt your body send electric shocks as jinyoung’s fingers came into contact with you.

you turned to face jinyoung and he smiled sweetly at you. “it looks beautiful.” he commented and you blushed, looking away from him.

jinyoung proceeded to hold both your hand, your attention going back to him.

“i know we may have just bonded but i’ve been attracted you since the first day i saw you. i don’t know if you feel the same but if you do, would you give me a shot?” he nervously confessed, his eyes looking into yours.

a smile crept up to your face and your heart started to beat faster. “jinyoung, you have no idea how much i have actually wanted you to say that and yes, of course i’ll give you a shot.”

jinyoung smiled wider and pulled you into a hug, his hands around your waist and yours around his. you both pulled away with the sounds of the other members cooing and you giggled shyly.

“kiss! kiss! kiss!” mark started to chant and the rest of the guys joined along.

jinyoung looked at you, as if to ask if it was okay and you gave him a reassuring smile. that was all he needed to lean in and softly place his lips on yours. your hands found its way to jinyoung’s chest and he pulled you closer, savouring the kiss before pulling apart.

the boys cheered and congratulated you too although the fireworks that appeared outside jinyoung’s window stole the attention. jinyoung wrapped his hands around your waist and you laid your head on his shoulder.

“thank you, jinyoung.” you started, looking up at him with thankful eyes.

“thank you for being my miracle this christmas.”

#kpop #kpop imagines #got7 imagines #got7 jinyoung #got7 one shot #park jinyoung #writing #fanfiction #jinyoung imagines #jinyoung #jinyoung sweet #jinyoung fluff

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dreamingstoriesinoursleep · 5 years

Text

12 Days of Starker Christmas - Day 11: Someone Drank Too Much Eggnog

This story is a prequel to Chapter 8, where we find out who Damon is and what happened the night that Tony saved Peter from one of the biggest mistakes in his life. Peter and Damon are a couple, Tony has a crush on Peter.

READ: This chapter contains triggers for sexual assault, rape and alcohol abuse.

Peter is 21 when this happens, however, there are flashbacks where he is 17.

---

Peter Parker will forever regret the day he let Damon get him drinks.

~ ~ ~

Two days earlier…

“We have been invited to my mate’s place for a Christmas party,” Damon said, calling through his dorm room to the young man currently showering.

“Who is this ‘mate’ of yours?” Peter calls out.

“He’s a mate from Lit class. Known him from high school.” Peter shuts off the water and wraps a towel around his waist before walking into the bedroom to get dressed for the day. “Do you wanna go?”

“Sure, why not.” Peter shrugs, pulling a t-shirt over his head, messing up his hair more than it already was from towel drying it. “Do we need to bring anything?” Damon looks up from packing his laptop bag.

“Just whatever drinks we want to take. I know you like the Christmas ones, so I was planning to go down to the store after classes today and get the ingredients for your Mum’s Peppermint Eggnog. Is that ok?” Peter was over the moon, he loved his Mother’s eggnog and it had been years since he had any due to living on campus.

Peter looked at his watch that he just slipped onto his wrist and noticed that he is going to be late meeting up with Tony for their chem project. “I have to fly, but I will see you back here tonight for dinner,” Peter said before leaning in and leaving a chaste kiss on Damon’s lips.

Peter ran to the library, in which he turned the sharp right to head upstairs where group projects were able to be completed in hushed talking so to not disturb the silent studiers downstairs. They were also able to eat and drink up here, so Peter already liked it so much better.

When he reached the top of the stairs Peter saw Tony at their usual table with a can of Dr Pepper for Peter and a can of Coke for Tony, along with a bag of lollies and a block of Peter’s favourite chocolate, milk choc honey nougat. “Sorry I am late! Was discussing a Christmas party for this Saturday.”

“At Clint’s?” Tony says, looking up from his notes that he was messily scribbling down, no doubt from their lecture yesterday morning.

“I don’t know exactly who he is, but sure.”

“He’s in my Lit class.”

“That’s it! I was just told some guy from Damon’s Lit class invited us to his dorm’s Christmas party.” Tony went quiet at the mention of Damon’s name.

You see, Tony has had a crush on the young man sat in front of him since he walked into class late and had to take the last seat available, which was right up the front next to a boy who looked far too young to be at University.

Tony was adamant on returning next week early enough to grab a seat at the back, but once he sat down and started the class, he was more than happy to sit up the front every time, if it meant sitting next to Peter.

“Hi,” Tony heard in a whisper next to him. “I’m Peter.”

Tony looked at the boy, literally, a boy in disbelief, no one ever tries talking to him, they all know who he is and that he really doesn’t like people, so they stay away and Tony stays happy, but not this kid, why?

“Tony.”

“Ooooh, Tony, as in short for Anthony, or Antonio, or-” Tony cut him off.

“Just Tony, only my Mum or Father ever call me ‘Anthony’.” Peter looked up meekly at the older man about to apologise profusely when he cut him off. “How old are you anyway?” Why the heck does Tony care? He never asks anyone questions, let alone some kid that he had to sit next to.

“17, sir.” Why did he just say sir? “I mean Tony!” Peter was flustered now and immediately put his head in his book and didn’t want to look at Tony again until the end of the class.

Tony, on the other hand, was more and more intrigued by the boy.

“17 huh?” Peter’s head snapped up so quickly that Tony was afraid his neck would break. “Why so young, kid?” Peter blushed at the name and stumbled over his words before he could get out the reason for his age.

“I-I-I, umm, I was top of my classes and they couldn’t offer me any higher education, so when NYU heard about me, they granted me a full scholarship and here I am.” Tony was blown away.

“Nice.” Peter smiled at the older man who was looking down at his notepad that was currently being scribbled on.

To the surprise of everyone, Tony and Peter became fast friends, everyone but Peter knowing that Tony doesn’t make friends, but Tony was intrigued by the boy and soon they were catching up for coffee and having study sessions and being lab partners, but before Tony was ready for it, he started craving the attention from the boy, started missing him, and very soon, started dreaming of him.

Tony consulted his friend, Sam. “I just don’t get it. I can’t get this kid out of my head.”

“Sounds like you have come down with a case of love.”

“You’re an idiot if you think I am falling in love. Me? Tony Stark, fall in love?” Sam just shrugged at him. That night when Tony got back to his dorm room and went to bed, he woke up after yet another dream of deep brown eyes, chocolate curls and a beautiful smile. He called Sam immediately, “Sam, I think I am in love.”

“Well, no shit.”

Four years later and Tony still had the same feelings, if not stronger, especially when he found out that Peter was dating some noob from the choir who looked like an arse and acted like he ran the joint. Tony and Sam watched action movies that whole night and ate pizza and drank beer, Sam taking his phone off of him when he tried to call Peter in the midst of his drunkenness.

Now in the present, Peter was excitedly talking about how Damon was to make his Mum’s famous Peppermint Eggnog and Tony should really try some as it is the best, and of course non-alcoholic because he doesn’t like alcohol, sure he’ll drink the stuff, but just thinks that nights can be better spent than wasting money on booze, then not remembering it the next day while your head is in the toilet bowl.

“So, you’re coming right?” Peter asked packing up from their project and standing to walk back to his and Damon’s dorm.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” Tony smiled up at the young man.

“Sweet! I will see you there study buddy.” And with that, Peter skipped his way out of the library and back to his dorm, leaving Tony with a smile and a warm heart.

~ ~ ~

The party is in full swing when Peter gets there with Damon, holding a bottle of homemade Peppermint Eggnog.

A guy who Peter suspects is Clint waves at the two boys when they walk in and moves away from the group he was currently at.

“He’s actually deaf, so I doubt that he will have his hearing aid in for the party, so he relies on sign language,” Damon whispers in Peter’s ear as Clint makes his way over.

‘Hey mate.’ Damon signs. ‘This is my boyfriend, Peter.’ Clint turns his attention to Peter and waves at him, smiling kindly.

Peter stuns all of them when he signs back at Clint ‘Hello, thanks for inviting us to your party.’ Maybe it was a bit slow, but Clint still applauded all the same. ‘I hope it’s not rude of me to ask, but how did you lose your hearing?’

Peter was good, but he still missed certain words which he would either ask Clint to repeat, or he would have Damon tell him what he signed.

‘Not at all. I was in a car accident when I was quite young and damaged the left-hand side of my brain.’ Peter was shocked. ‘A piece of glass sliced down the right-hand side of my head, cutting into my ear and damaging the cochlea. I was diagnosed as 80% deaf and I have been for my entire life. I wear a hearing aid most of the time, but on nights like tonight, I turn them off, take them out and feel the bass. It’s exhilarating.’ Peter couldn’t help but smile at that.

‘I had a friend who was 100% deaf and mute, so I learned sign language with all of our mutual friends and we surprised her for her birthday one year by signing “Happy Birthday” to her. We nearly flooded the room with tears.’ Clint and Peter shared a laugh at the young man’s story. ‘OH! We brought some Peppermint Eggnog, my Mum’s recipe, non-alcoholic. Feel free to have some.’ Clint smiled and held out his empty cup after tipping the rest into his mouth.

‘Please?’ Peter nodded and poured out a sample. ‘That’s delicious! I’ll have to grab the recipe.’ However, Peter shook his head.

‘Sorry, family secret.’ Clint eyed him off but laughed it off as a joke which Peter took lightly. Peter then noticed a familiar face sitting on the end of the couch nursing a scotch.

‘Excuse me.’

“Tony!” Peter yelled in delight and plopped himself down next to the older man. “How’s it hanging?” Tony smiled at the young man who just made his night by saying his name alone.

“Young master Peter,” Tony said looking over at him. “How’s it hanging? Have you been drinking tonight? Damon plying you with alcohol?” Tony’s voice nearly turning venomous at the thought of Damon giving the young lad alcohol, when he clearly doesn’t like to drink at parties.

At Tony’s words, Peter scrunches his face up. “No! You know that he knows that I don’t drink at parties! Besides, I have only had my Mum’s famous Peppermint Eggnog. Ooo, you should try some, it’s amazing!”

“Pete, I have had it before. You make me a bottle every year for my Chrissy present. However, mine has Peppermint Schnapps, yours just has Peppermint Oil.” Peter smiles, Tony is the only person that isn’t in the family who knows Maria’s recipe, namely because Peter called Tony one late night, before he met Damon, in tears and far too hysterical to be understood over the phone. Tony, being the amazing friend, he was, raced over to his dorm in nothing but an oversized sweater, flannel pyjama pants and bed socks to find Peter sadly mopping up spilt eggnog on his hands and knees.

According to Peter, once the mess was cleaned up and he had calmed down, he had tried to move the pot from the stove to the counter, when the oven mitt’s seam split open causing Peter’s hand to come in contact with the hot handle which automatically led Peter to let go of the pot and all of its contents.

“Look at the bright side.” Peter sniffled, wiping his nose on the back of his hand. “Your dorm smells amazing from all this peppermint.” This caused an unexpected laugh to erupt from Peter’s lips.

Tony volunteered to go and buy some more supplies at the 24-hour convenience store down the street from the dorms and come back and make the drink again. Thirty minutes later, Tony knocks on Peter’s dorm door and they spend the next hour mixing together and slowly simmering the creamy peppermint mixture. By the time they place it in the ice bath and cool it enough for bottling, the clock tower in town strikes two am.

In celebration, the boys pour a glass for themselves and Tony ends up spending the night, much to his dismay, of course, not really, in Peter’s bed which Peter was adamant on sharing stating that the couch was no place for a saviour. That year started the Christmas tradition of Peter giving a bottle to Tony for helping him.

Back at the party, Tony took a swig from the bottle, sure that something wasn’t right, not with how the boy was acting. Much to his surprise, it tasted just as it usually did. Tony was probably just trying to find faults in Damon due to jealousy.

“Well, I am going to find Damon, I will see you back here?” Peter asks, eyes wide and a small smile gracing his lips. How could Tony say no to that?

“Of course.” Peter kissed his cheek and off he went. Tony held his cheek, stunned and a little bit more in love. Damn that Peter Parker.

Peter hopped into the kitchen to ensure that his drink remained cold and went to find Damon who was outside playing beer pong.

“PETER!” Damon yelled, making the young man wince at the volume in which he was speaking. “Come and be my good luck charm!” Peter could tell that he was very drunk, if not by his speech, then by the number of cups missing from his side of the table.

When Peter got close enough to Damon, he was pulled in and kissed hard, causing those around them to whoop and cheer loudly. Peter, not enjoying the taste and the attention pulls away from Damon immediately and tries to laugh it off, but can tell that Damon isn’t impressed.

The boys finish the game of beer pong, in which Damon loses, but he is in good spirits as he offers to fetch everyone a round of drinks, including Peter who stays outside under the stars with Clint and a few other guys from Damon’s Lit class.

Damon walks out with multiple red solo cups in hand and Peter, being so thirsty chugs the entirety of his eggnog. However, thirty minutes later after a second solo cup of eggnog, Peter begins to complain of a sore stomach and feeling a bit light-headed, which is common for Peter when he gets sick. Damon offers to take him up to Clint’s room, who has a lock on his door so that Peter can rest. Peter agrees and once Damon collects the key from Clint, they make their way upstairs, Peter really feeling worse for wear now.

By the time they make it upstairs Peter is feeling less steady on his feet and collapses on the bed, Damon following soon after once he makes sure to lock the door again behind them. Peter closes his eyes, trying to prevent the room from spinning, so when he feels the bed dip with the added weight of Damon, he simply assumes that the older male is going to just sleep it off, however, two minutes later he finds out that he was terribly wrong.

Downstairs, Tony notices two people in his peripheral vision walking up the stairs, of course, it is one of those parties. He looks around for Peter, trying to see if the young male can brighten his mood again, but what he sees instead is a less than steady Peter being pushed up the stairs by a persistent Damon.

Tony instantly notes that Peter has been drinking. He has seen Peter drunk only once when his Uncle passed and this is a mirror image of that night. Tony sprung into action, grabbing the bottle of eggnog from the door of the fridge and smelling it, pulling it away from his nose the moment that the scent reaches his nostrils, due to the sharp smell of vodka, somehow strong enough to overpower the peppermint oil.

Tony dropped the bottle, the last of the eggnog spilling out as he ran upstairs to Clint’s bedroom, which we knew was locked. He would have kept walking too if he didn’t hear something that made his stomach churn. “Please, no. Stop, Damon.” Tony pounded on the door and jiggled the door handle, but to no avail, the door was locked.

Tony could hear Peter clear as day now. “Help! Please! Help me!” Tony was running on pure adrenaline now as he backed up and crashed through the door, splintering the wood as he pulled the bolted lock off along with the door.

Tony saw white-hot rage at the scene before him. Damon was laying on top of Peter, the young man’s shirt ripped open and his pants opened at the fly, Damon’s pants fully off and his boxers bunched under his arse. Tony lunged at the bed and punched Damon square in the jaw, knocking the man out cold before pulling Peter free of him and doing up his fly before pulling off his own jumper and forcing it over Peter’s naked torso.

Peter, finally registering he was safe collapsed into Tony’s arms who picked him up and walked down the stairs, out of the house and across campus into his own dorm room to tuck the boy into bed. Peter was roused by the feeling of his shoes being removed and being tucked into the sheets. “Please.” Peter whimpered, grabbing a hold of Tony’s wrist before the man could walk off. “Stay,” Peter asked with unshed tears in his eyes.

Tony pulled off his shoes and climbed in behind Peter, cradling him until he felt the young male’s breathing even out. It was only then that Tony allowed himself to sleep.

In the morning Tony went through everything that happened at the party, holding Peter as he collapsed into tears over what his boyfriend, someone he trusted, did to him. Tony offered to go and collect Peter’s things and move him into his dorm room, which Peter agreed, under one condition, he was to come with him, and if he saw Damon, he was to get the first punch.

They ended up getting into the room without anyone else present, however, just as they were leaving with the last box, Damon turned up and tried to plead with Peter to stay. Peter didn’t speak, didn’t scream, didn’t even cry. He just put the box down, looked Damon directly in the face, before connecting his right hand to Damon’s jaw, after which he picked up the box and left.

“Peter ple-” Tony cut him off by pushing Damon against the wall and kneeing him in the balls before punching him in the face as well.

“You come near him, you breathe a word about him, you even try to message him,” Tony said, pushing the man into the wall after each threat. “I will make you hurt a lot more than you would like to know.” And with that, Tony left the dorm room and never looked back.

Months later, after an investigation went down and Peter didn’t press charges, much to the dismay of Tony. “I just want this to be over with, Tony. Please?”

“Ok, for you.”

Peter was still healing. He still had nightmares and would wake up screaming, kicking and scratching Tony. Peter would freak out if Tony and he were anything more than kissing and touching.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t do it,” Peter says, disheartened again after a heavy make-out session ended in another panic attack.

“It’s ok, you are still healing.”

“Will it always be like this?”

“No. One day you will be fine, and until that day, I will be here, waiting for you, loving you and helping you heal.” Peter was crying again, but this time for a good reason.

“You just said loving me. Do you love me?” Peter was in disbelief.

“I do. I love you so much, more than you could ever know.”

“I love you too.”

---

PLEASE READ!!!

Hey guys, so I thought that I would write a different end message to the usual copy and paste job that I do.

I know that this is a super hard topic and that it is very trigger worthy, but please if you need help or need to talk to someone about anything like this, do not hesitate to contact places like Lifeline (13 11 14), Suicide Line Victoria, Australia (1300 651 251) or even Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636). These are Australian numbers, but please, do seek help with either a professional or even a family member or friend.

You are not alone and if you ever want a chat, hit me up. I will always be there for you guys and I hope that you will always be there for one another.

I love you my Little Pandas! xx

#Starker #Starker Christmas #Tony #Tony Stark #Iron Man #Peter #Peter Parker #Spider-Man #Marvel #Cute #Fluffy

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