#god so much of this game annoys me. and yet im gonna be that stupid bastard that still buys and plays the game. ugh.

[spif-lol]

Reasons why the simpsons hit and run stream is jerma's best stream

it's ELEVEN HOURS LONG

you get to witness his slow descent into madness as he insists on playing the whole game in one sitting

I can watch it when i replay the game, would recommend makes it way more enjoyable

he spends too much time doing really bad impressions trying to copy voice lines for the game and yelling "HIRE ME IM AVAILABLE"

He decides to confess half an hour in that he knows nothing about the simpsons and has only seen like one or two episodes

this is ten minutes after he references a specific episode, and then proceeds to get told off for 'spoiling' an episode of the simpsons (from like 1995) by chat

Chat also somehow manages to convince him that ten year old boy Bart Simpson's famous catchphrase from everyone's favourite family animated tv show is 'eat ass'

In general it switches between him refusing to believe things people tell him about the game despite being true and falling for obvious lies

he starts the game going 'lol wouldnt it be funny if you could run over simpsons characters' and then jokingly drives towards civillians thinking they'll jump out of the way. they go flying. he is so confused

the dissonance between early and later parts of the stream are palpable. It turns from a cheerful and lighthearted exploration of a funny simpsons game that he refuses to take seriously or accept that it could genuinely make him angry, and transforms into a desperate race against time, his computer and his own hubris as he seeks simply to finish the game so he can sleep. This stream destroys him.

the way the stream highlights are named on his youtube is hilarious. "Jerma will not get angry at the simpson's hit and run" -> "Jerma might get a bit angry at the simpson's hit and run" -> "d'oh"

it's extremely funny how many time he's convinced he's in the last level of the game, only to be wrong. the first time he thinks that is in the first section and hour of the stream

easily his most rewatchable stream (this is gonna cover a lot of dot points)

the amount of tragic irony and foreshadowing in this stream is almost cinematic.

at the very start of the game he complains about the music being too loud and monologues about sounds and over stimulation of game music bothers him, which of course will be very funny in the finale

he also comments a few time at the start about how annoying homer's random voice lines are, and says 'oh god he's gonna repeat that a thousand times before the end of this game'. he's right, and it nearly drives him crazy by the final mission

speaking of the final mission(s), the second time he has to transport the toxic sludge from power plant to the school he like pauses the game and very seriously addresses chat like 'alright tell me right now are the next three levels also me driving the nuclear waste to the school that cant be possible right'. and then just accepting in defeat that that is in fact how this incredibly stupid and difficult children's game finishes

when he first races against the malibu stacy car and gets destroyed he gets mad and says he wishes he could drive that car. then when he gets to drive it in later levels he quickly decides its his favourite and maintains that until the end of the game

on rewatch... you hear him audibly crack open a can that chat demands he prove to them is soft drink and not alcohol like A WHOLE HOUR before The Incident and it's a little like watching a disaster movie where you see the characters laughing and having fun little knowing how they are being hastened towards their own doom... like chat keeps bugging him about it, he keeps making excuses, he keeps sipping the drink. they bring attention to it so much and you listen to it just knowing the pain that is yet to come. dramatic irony at its finest and most heartache inducing

15. ohmyfucking gaaaawd no! no... god... ICANDOITINAJUMP! ..... BART. WHERE IS HE??? BAAART!!!! AAAUUGH

16. actually fr there's a lot of memorable jerma lines in this stream, rewatching it is like watching a jerma funny moment compilation

17. the final couple of levels where he is getting steadily more overwhelmed to the point of ferality, and then he says he has an idea and goes to the sound menu and turns everything off. voice lines. music. sound effects. and then we watch him play the level in complete silence. and it actually helps him focus its really funny

18. the whole tragic sequence where he is in the FINAL LEVEL. he has played it so many times and just missed it by a few seconds. he is tired. he is hungry. he just wants to get off stream and eat a BURGER. he is focussing as hard as he can. he is almost there. he runs over too many things and the police are after him. but its okay. he's doing it! he's gonna make it!!! he gets to the school with time to spare and is sucked up into the end of the game beam. it's over. except then the police get sucked into the beam as well. he gets arrested in the beam. which teleports him and the car out of the beam. WHICH MEANS THE TIMER RUNS OUT AND HE LOSES. so he has to do it all over again. it's actually so so so funny and also something i think i personally wouldn't survive if i was in jerma's position in that moment

19. okay we have to talk about The Incident. bc i already alluded to it and bc like, i couldn't not talk about it. as stated above Jerma cracks open a can so you can hear it and chat immediately accuses him of being an alcoholic. he adamantly insists that it is a soft drink not a beer but they refuse to believe him unless he proves it by showing camera. he's playing on a modded ps2 pc port or whatever of the simpsons so it's a complicated setup and he explains that it would be too hard and also he's shirtless so they will just have to believe without seeing. chat continues to harass him while he goes on to play the game, specifically most of the lisa level. he laughs it off but eventually caves, gets up and get a blanket to cover himself and then alt tabs, holds his can up to the camera and says 'alright you satisfied? that might have just fucked up the game'. so then he tries to tab back into the game and it. crashes. hard. so hard that the game won't actually turn back on. so jerma's cursing and fiddling with the controls and saying its over. then it finally reboots and the game works and he's so relieved and it loads and he realises that he has lost SO MUCH PROGRESS. he's back at the start of the lisa section. this is truly the turning point of the game where it goes from being a fun experience to a nightmare gauntlet

20. on a related note: jerma waiting with bated breath *sound of simpsons game booting back up after refusing to for far too long* jerma: yeeeAAAAAH

21. im watching it right now as i replay, which is why im thinking about it obv. so i will almost certainly have more to add to this

[chokkito]

Top ten favorite character duos or trios (romantic, platonic, otherwise etc)?

OKKK THIS WILL BE A BIT LONG SO ^-^ bear with me pleaseee, also i will be putting some ocs here because im just like that im sorry anon <3 ALSO THE LIST WONT BE IN ORDER BECAUSE I LOVE THEM ALL VERY MUCH THE SAME

1 - Sans and Papyrus

Is Undertale considered cringe rn? Idk and idc to be honest, god these two had SUCH a chockhold on me when i was like 11-13, i loved them both SOOO MUCH, i just found them extremely funny and also very charming, also nowadays everytime i see them i just see me and my sister because everytime we bicker about something is never serious and ends up in us just trying to annoy each other like they do....Aughhhghh i love these silly skeletons.....

2 - Nikita and Anya (Anya was made by @raskolovey btw <3)

YEAH DIDNT TAKE A LOT FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT MY OCS...Also ignore how Anya has some eyebrows in it, they were there for comedical effect....ANYWAYS!!!! OHHHH THESE TWO, GODDDD, i love them. i love them so much. I love how they end up being a mirror with each other (with nikita being considered a "god" as he grew up and Anya being considered a monster) but how both of these views on them from a young age made them have kinda of the same trauma and problems with not knowing who they actually are, and how this made them so close to one another.

Also idk the idea of Anya being the normal one despite it all is very funny to me, points for them being platonic soulmates

3 - Rin and Len

THE SIBLING SEVER GODDDD I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHH AND THEIR DESIGNS ARE SO GENIUS IDK WHAT THE DESIGNERS OF THE V2 GEN WERE EATING BUT I WANT THAT TOO TO COOK SUCH GENIUS DESIGNS (we ignore im using their V4 counterparts i was too lazy to get a V2 one) BUT AUGHHH AGAIN THESE TWO HAD SUCH A CHOCKHOLD ON ME WHEN I GOT IN MY VOCALOID PHASE (when i was like. 9. to like. this day. im gonna be 20 in a month btw) BUT GODDDD I LOVE THEMMMMM I LOVE THEM MY FAVORITE VOCALOIDS EVERRRRR I WANT TO ONE DAY BUY THEM DESPITE NOT KNOWING HOW TO TUNE OR MAKE MUSICCCCC

4 - The Funger 1 cast

idc if theyre four im sorry im feeling like when the teacher tells you to make like duos and you ask them if you can make a duo of 3 people but yknwo I CANT SEPARATE THEM!!!! God these four IDIOTS are so STUPID and i HATE THEM so much but i also love them and GODDDD any fanart involving these four together is simply PURE GOLD...I know funger is like a really dark game with dark subjects and all but yknow i like to imagine them somehow just being friends...I think they deserve it...4 single parents to the girl...single because these foes are NOT married and yet they all act like a divorced polyamorous couple!!!!!

5 - Jing Yuan and Yanqing

FATHER AND SON??? FATHER AND SON GWAHHHHHHHOGRBOTIOGBETIBRI AUGHHH I LOVE SOME SINGLE PARENT REPRESENTATION IN MEDIA!!!!! Ok so like the idea of Yanqing just being adopted by Jing Yuan and him taking care of Yanqing i just...aughghhghhh IM SORRY BUT anything involving a single parent and their kid just makes me IMMEDIATELY happy, i LOVE seeing any type of happy family representation in media, they are just SUCH CUTIES!!! Like look at Jing Yuan...Hes just proud of his son...And Yanqing's little >:D face.......Aughghghghghhhghhhhhh did i put them here just because honkai is my current hyperfocus?....Yeah! But anyways!!!!

Also anon i was gonna put 10 here but....its midnight...and im a bit tired....so i will just put 5.........im sorry.......sniffs...................

[gnarlymetalghost]

okay so my boyfriend broke up with me (for reasons that feel dumb to me but are very real for someone who has anxiety), i convinced him to just go on a break, blah blah blah we talked again and i think i fucked it up royally because i told him he was being immature about it. i need to apologize to him but i’m worried that the more i talk to him, the less there will be to save. i’m just gonna write it down here instead.

i’m sorry i said that you were being immature. i’m a lot like my dad and i have a lot of tendencies towards black and white thinking. it seems immature to me, but the anxiety about making the right decisions is so real.

for me, i don’t think anyone is the right choice. any number of people can be the right choice. i think that if you find someone who you want to have experiences with, that’s enough. you have to choose that person, with all of their issues and assets. and it’s stupid and terrible because there’s always gonna be a voice in the back of your head that’s saying “did i make the right choice? did sierra make the right choice?” but it doesn’t matter, it’s a good enough choice for right now.

the culture we live in and grew up in is stupid but we can’t escape it and we’re living with the programming, as hard as we’re trying to escape it. i’m not holding you to forever. i’m not holding you for eternity. i think i would if you let me, but i don’t know if i’ve seriously considered marrying you. it could be fun, but i’m not thinking about it because that’s not where we are yet. i’m enjoying life with you right now. that’s enough. if you’re scared about a future, i’m just holding you to tomorrow. and we take it day by day. the pressure you’re putting on yourself is unfair, i wish you could let yourself be casual about it.

there’s a lot of language that’s thrown around about it that weigh really heavy on people in our situation. “when you know you know” is comforting to some people but to me it feels like when someone says “you’ll know when you feel the spirit.” how? is it heightened emotions or is it god? do i love you or am i horny? and what is love? because i don’t feel butterflies for you all the time. sometimes i feel scared we’re running out of things to talk about. and then i get stressed because is that real or is it because my period is about to start? but then i’m laying in bed scrolling through tiktok and all i can think about is sending them to you and texting you about how crazy my grandma is and asking if you wanna watch saw x when i see you next. relationships ebb and flow but they take work. i want to put in the work.

i’m sorry that it feels like i’m throwing away a friendship for the both of us. i have had big feelings for you for a long time, and i understand how that’s scary for you. time and time again we’ve had this conversation about whether or not we should date, and i sacrificed myself to maintain the status quo. i didn’t want to lose you, i didn’t want you to lose me. but in doing so, you’ve never known what it’s like when i’m not around. i keep creating an environment where you don’t lose anything but i feel like the world is crumbling. i thought i was being mature because it take a big person to stay friends with someone they love, but maybe i’m just not a big person. maybe it’s not the mature thing for me to do when i let myself hurt so much so that you stay. maybe the mature thing is to finally let us both feel the loss. and if i can survive it and it’s permanent, then it is what it is. these boundaries i set were not an easy decision because there’s comfort in the pain of keeping you around on your terms, and i already fucking miss you.

i don’t give up on things. i’ve 100%ed every video game i’ve ever played, i’ve never given up on a book no matter how long it takes me, and i’ve finished every movie i’ve ever started. it’s probably an annoying trait. but by god i haven’t given up on you yet and im not going to now. i want to work through this. and every time we do this stupid dance, we always end up closer than before, despite my best efforts. i wanted to keep you at arms length but you ended up in my arms instead. i said it before but i maintain my conviction: the attraction, our friendship, and being a health partnership is a good enough reason to continue this path, regardless of if it’s right or not. i still think it’s too soon to tell, even for me, as happy as i’ve been for the last two months.

but if it’s just not going to work, i’m gonna miss you. some of my favorite things were when you put your arms around me at the Collective Soul concert. i was still nervous that you weren’t attracted to me, and it made me feel good that you wanted to be close with all of those people around. i’m gonna miss watching movies. film analysis while holding hands is my love language. i’m gonna miss my hands in the hair on the back of your neck, i’m gonna miss seeing you play the bass, i’m gonna miss being able to simply glance at you and know that you thought of the exact same joke that i did without even saying it out loud. you don’t know if you’ll be in love with me, and that’s okay. because even if you were never in love with me, i think these things were love. i don’t think love is as deep as the people around us make it out to be. i think that love is the act of choosing.

if this is permanent and we don’t stay together, the door is always open. i’ll always want you around if you want to come back. inversely, if i get over you and can broach the topic of being friends without feeling the heartache, i hope you’ll leave that door open for me.

i’m sorry again, for all of it. thank you again, for all of it.

[engagemythrusters]

okay. ahsoka. here we go

Immediately a fan of the music. Did they get the same people as TBOBF and The Mandalorian? The Ludwig person? Forgot the name…

INTRO CRAWL?! DAMNNNNN

But also red? Why red crawl?

Why is she searching for Thrawn not Ezra. Like I know the two left together but you think Ezra would be the priority. Not thrawn.

Aaand there’s the ship. Always start Star Wars with a ship.

Uuuugh my pirate site keeps buffering. Booooooooo

“They’re jedi” okay vibe but are they actually. Or is it those sorta-Sith guys

Ugh okay my annoying I have to go without subtitles now… :/ tbjs js gonna be hard

Okay that was a very Star Trek move. Why. For what.

YEAH ITS THOSE SITHLIKE BITCHES

Shin Hati evil love that for her. Love evil gorls

Evil granpa got shoulders daaamn love that for him

Ah it’s Bad Wig Girl.

God seriously why are the wigs so bad. Fucjing Disney. Boo.

Man I miss when Star Wars had cool titles. Phantom Menace. Return of the Jedi. Now it’s just fuckin NAMES.

Oooo interesting place. Old jedi temple? Looks like it.

Aaand her Lekku and Montrals still look like shjt styrofoam.

Okay fun lightsaber trick. At least theh didn’t forget how cool Ahsoka Tano is.

Wonder if we’ll see Morai…

Oh wow. Ahsoka wearss lipgloss ig. Okay.

This is very slow paced. Move a lil girl.

Those remind me a lil of the Zeffo spheres. But if they were filled. Idk maybe I’m making a connection that isn’t there. I just really like Star Wars Jedi games. Their lore was WAY COOL.

What do droids need capes for tho. Like why. That’s literally so fuckin impractical

UH DAVID TENNANT rip

RAMP JUMP RAMP JUMP RAMP JUMP

God I love T-6 shuttles. Best Star Wars ship. I mean other than bobas. But yeah T-6 sexiest SW ship

Do we get to see Sabine soon I miss her

OH MY GOD HERA

OHHHHHHHHH MY GOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

THE GASP I JUST GUSP

Okay her makeup and contacts really really suck

Hera just. Disbelieving. I get it. She’s so hurt she can’t let herself hurt anymore.

“Does that mean Ezra—“ WEEPING

Hera “oh my god more jedi bullshit I can never escape” Syndulla

SHES NOT FORCE SENSITIVE LEAVE HER ALONE

YAY SABINEEEEEE

Oh lothal so so pretty

RYDER hi!

EZRA MONUMENT?!

Ohhh it’s that wall

Ohhhhhh weeping

SABEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

Oh she’s not there

Hehe I love her

OH IS THA—YEDSSS JAI

I love u Jai

God look at them. Look at the wall. Christ. Kanan…

Hehe sabine

SPECTER?! YOURE NOT ALLOWED THAT. YOU DONT DESERBE IT. THATS FOR THE FAMILY. THATS FOR! FAMILY!!!!

Sabine u shit hehe

This is a good actress for her 10/10 thank you for giving yourself to our beloved explosions girl

“She’s crazy” yeah she had years of being stupid with Ezra to make her nuts xoxo

TOWER TOWER TOWER

OHHH KITTH KITTH KITTY AAAH

What’s the kitties name

Ohh it even uses the same loth cat sounds from the show AND real kitty sounds

What’s the NAME of kittyyyyy

Oh Ezra’s stuff 😭

EZRAAAAAAA

“More than others” WHAT?! Okay. Not sure what that means.

YES SISTER OKAY YES. NO SHIPPING. JUST SISTER. AND BROTHER.

Not sure that I like the change that recording brought. But. It’s okay I’ll accept it.

Evil gorl <3

SHES A DUCKIN NIGHTSISTER?!

WHYD she choose such a bland ass name then?!?!!

INQUISITOR?!!!

THATS AN INQUISITOR

SABINE IS NOT FORCE SENSITIVE *FUCK YOU* LITERALKY S4 OF REBELS CONFIRMED IT SO HARD THAT CHANGING IT WOULD MAKE THIS THE STUPIDEST THING EVER IN THE HISTORY OF STAR WARS

oh my god. Jesus that was force shit wasn’t it. Fuck that oh my fod DONT MAKE HER FORCE SENSITIVE YOU DUMB FUCKS. IM SO FUCKING MAD.

Haircut time?

No not yet.

That was CRAP dialogue. That was HORRIBLE. Wow. Oh my god fire these writers. So hard.

I do love this music tho. It’s p good.

Okay so far it does NOT make sense how ahsoka arrives at the tower at the end of rebels. This isn’t fair. I loved that scene so much.

Awww chopper drawing.

Okay she’s a puzzle maker now as well as an artist? That’s dumb

GOD SHES NOT. FORCE. SENSITIVE.

THIS IS SO FUCJING STUPID THIS IS DUMB!!!

SHES! NOT!! FORCE!!! SENSITIVE!!!!

And she’s gonna steal it isn’t she hehe she is def Ezra’s sister >:)

Huyang like “I taught this”

Luke so not the only jedi he was meant to be hehe I mean k get it. But also it’s so dumb 😂

SHE DID IT HEHE I LOVE U SABINE

Sad that they didn’t make Lothals mountains just like the ones in the real series.

Towerrr

Kittyyyy

WHAT JS KITTY NAME PLEAS TELL ME

callin him Turkeyleg until told otherwise

Sigh I miss Ezra.

Fucking miss Kanan. It still hurts so much.

It’s been so long does Sabine still hurt? Does she still miss him the way she used to?

Heraaaa hiii 🥰

Hera knows her daughter

Okay so why is holograms so. Sounding like this. It’s more… MORE. Than how they used to sound. Is technology worsening or some shit?? Don’t like that.

Ahsoka stop being MEAN TO MY SABINE.

Yeah SNIPS. Ha.

Heras greatest strength is that she is understanding above all else. And I love her sm for it.

FATHER SON DAUGHTER RIGHT

I better be

Palm hand fist…

Oh.

Okay fine.

Hhhh.

SHES SO SMART I LOVE HERRRRRR

Mr Tukeyleg

OH NO DONT HURT SABINE OR TURKEYLEG

Ah shit yeah I figured

Nothing will ever be easy for her. Nor for ezra.

HELMET

*HIS SABER*

SHES NOT FUCKING FORCE SENSITIVE OKAH

She can use a lightsaber and she can use the Darksaber BUT BY GOD SHE IS NOT FORCE SENSITIVE

Why are u flying so slow 😭

OH MY Fod

OH MY GOD NO SABINE

No not my girl 😭

Oh is that the end ep 1?

Oh who is Ray? Rest well, Ray <3

Ep two coming in a sec.

[wariolandthepipdimension]

im so mad at myself. is it even my turn to vent yet probably not but fuck the rules baby

uh. tw for me yapping about suicide and general queerphobia and bullying and shit

i keep fucking staying up until 5 am on my phone because im scared of sleeping because i might have nightmares about otherwise trivial things that irritate me because im a stupid self centered bitch whos so scared of a little bit of hate because apparently its almost like that person wants to kill me.

and staying up on my phone isn't even the thing im worried about here its the fact that im mostly on tumblr. because its the only place i feel safe. and what if my mom finds it through the apps i spend the most time on and looks at my blog and sees that i dont strictly use she/her pronouns and supports palestine and supports all queer identities and actually does kill me. or at least does something that leads to me. you know. committing chapter 8 my life ends here.

and also the fact that i stay up all night and go to sleep until 1 pm. i feel so disgusting and lazy depression probably doesnt even excuse it atp im probably just looking for comfort since nobody else can give it to me i mean others have it far worse than i do lol

and Him. dont fucking forget about Him. i had a fucking nightmare about him touching me. not even in anywhere intimate just on my head. just the idea of him making any form of physical contact with me is fucking repulsive. im absolutely terrified to go back to school because what if hes planning things to do to hurt me. what if he has more friends to harm me. what if he hurts Her because Shes one of the only people who trusts me. he didnt even do that much he just made me extremely uncomfortable

literally the only four things keeping me from killing myself are my online friends and the spicy cookies from the hit korean mobile game franchise known as cookie run (specifically only peperoncino and habanero and capsaicin and the other scovillia cookies but my prove is still pointen) and the haha funny wario game released for the nintendo wii on july 24 2008 and the one girl from my school i have an extremely obsessive crush on and if she Finds Out™ then 3/4 of those things (or all 4 if she's sick enough to keep me out of school to "protect me further from the gay agenda") are gonna be taken away from me and. quick question to my mom. do you want a dead child? no? then get your shit together and stop making baseless threats against me for having human decency.

"why do you hide everything from me????????? 🥺🥺🥺" well if you never made those threats to me because i reacted in an almost justified way when you were being hateful about trans people i would have felt more comfortable telling you things. and dont even try and say "but i support the gays too!!!!!!! but not the mutilation psychos!!!!!!" youd probably tell someone to stop shoving it in their faces if you saw even a little tiny lesbian flag pin on their jacket. and stop using psycho for every person you ever so slightly have beef with. its getting annoying and not everyone who thinks trans people should have basic rights has a psychotic disorder. thank you <3

i wouldve been more hopeful about everything if my parents didnt have fucking fox news on every evening and not one not two but THREE FUCKING PRO TRUMP SHITSTUFF in their front yard. these fuckers never learn. i hope blue wins this year so i can see them wail and bitch about their stupid little fascist orange losing. but again thats just one of the dumb little trivial things that frustrate me beyond my limits. i find it funny how i pretend im just. not interested in anything political but. does a backflip

my fucking god can someone just fucking euthanize me. wait not even that. just fucking torture me and keep me alive. like do some wild shit. make the devil shiver even more than he would when a nice guy loses his temper.

i know im overreacting. i know im just making shit up like the self centered pile of flesh i am. but im so mad right now im beyond livid i might blast glittertown in my earbuds again to at least dull the rage

[cornballes]

big rant abt my smr dr experience??? i think??? tw; sh

tbh tho at the time i was doing that shit i WAS um.. pretty (does that twirly finger thing around my head????) at the time of making those baitposts. I dont mind ppl finding my idenity now because ik thats just another annoying fuck i dont have to talk to.. ever! i just dont send it HERE cause.. well.. thats too easy <3 I thought that ppl were gonna harass me to no end, and tbh i DID get some.. really.. fucked up anons from just being annoying back then and ig i thought itd go to my fr account too. (racism, death threats, ableism, and MORE! this starter pack rocks!) Idk why people were so obsessed with finding my fucking dragon porn game identity though. like okay ???? #69837 aint my address dumbass... I joined this fr drama server because anons kept telling my (paranoid + rude ass) to go and shit it up cause "ppl were talking shit abt me" and i was like oh my god its time to catch HANDS!!!! i still hv an archive of the super duper dm-fight but.. the owner said "whatever goes in server stays there" so well. i calmly deleted the sses </3

idk why they were upset I uh. showed off their tag when they were fucking EXCITED to tell evryone mine, though...like i went "OH OH sorry, ill add it" and this dude was fucking shaking his hands jumping for joy to fucking do it for me. calm down butthead!!!!!!

i think a huge root of my rudeness and.. assholish attitude was my paranoia...and larp-craziness. i was scared for my damn life.. when i typed that shit up i was genuinely shaking n talking to myself for hours afterward Im still upset that people decided to take my thoughts of watning to send ppl my scars etc to face value, but tbh its fr. fr ppl are stupid. I was genuinely in a fucked up place and i was using making myself a "cringe, annoying troll punching bag" as coping mech.. when it was ACTUALLY making things worse.. and well. dr+smr people realllly didnt help. literally egging me on to continue to hurt myself and stuff in my inbox... people calling me a fucking evil person who sends people things ive never sent to anyone ever and never actually would.

people used me venting fucking AGAINST me and painted me as a villain when all i wanted was.. to make people laugh. but it turned into ppl laughing at ME, and not the jokepost.. people took my stop posting abt amongus copypasta so serious, got mad abt me wanting a stinky fujo coomer dragon npc.. list goes on.. i took pleasure in making ppl mad at me, but it also hurt a fuckton

i mean.. now i can laugh abt how much of a dumb bitch i was. nothing i posted since then has ever been that successful. or cringe. or annoying... lol.. some people has asked me to post again but.. idk. i just wanna be normal now. int with the people who havent blocked me yet.. ik thye hate me but i hope that one day they restalk my blog and decide to be neutral towards me again..

until then um..

dear anti anti exalters: YOU PISS ME THE FUCK OFF. oh yeah.. YOU KNOW WHO I AMMM, KAGURAA!

bye :)

[orcelito]

The new fire emblem's protagonists Do kinda look better with fanartists. But I just hate how they look in the actual game. They look so ridiculous and incongruent within their own designs. It's so glaring, it will probably be hard to ignore in-game.

[remuscore]

I’m going to be so annoying for awhile with all the top tier Remus content we just got I need to make a list.

First off I just want to say the emblem totally should have been pointing at his asshole like an arrow. I will not be taking criticism on this.

Still love it tho <3

I’m glad he’s “forbidden creativity” and not “dark” bc it’s just a lot better. Doesn’t imply he’s bad and wrong, just that his ideas are considered taboo and weird as fuck.

Also him not being labeled “intrusive thoughts” like everyone tries to label him like NO HE IS CREATIVITY NOT JUST INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS

Everything about the line “Open your fucking mind, bro!!!” Was gold lmao. I’m so glad I’m writing him correctly with being so casual and sweary.

Him being so bitter and dismissive about only being in three episodes so far.

Him being so vague and evil with his evil little prayer hands. Also implying he’s gonna be apart of the big storm coming like… he’s gonna have a big ROLE soon guys I’m dying.

Anti Spoiler Spray. Enough said.

He hates soap SO FUCKING MUCH yet asking Janus to stab him instead is fine. Honestly, I think it would be ten times funnier if Janus just fucking stabbed him to shut him up lmao.

“Boo hoo let me play you a song on the world’s tiniest violin :(( bitch you guys are boring.” FUCKING LOVE HIM

I so badly want to see what he did to the mindpalace. I mean I know they use that space to record for green screening, but please Thomas I want to see what he did to that room. I want to see the graffiti of butts and dicks.

Idk who was saying what when they were dashing away to not get caught playing Patton’s ddr, BUT the fact that Remus was worse at the game than Janus is so fucking funny to me.

(Remus was on the right).

Also the fact that they regularly break into the other sides’ rooms to mess with their shit is the best thing to come out of this episode I’m so fucking happy about that.

Him getting so excited about Thomas putting his nicknames in….. *sobs*

He gets all scrunchy and stimmy GOD I’m going to crush his stupid head in my hands he’s precious.

The “Pissy” joke PLEASE I love how he just wants to annoy the shit outta his brother.

AND THOMAS DOING IT IS SOME HOW FUNNIER IM SO UPSET THAT WE DIDNT GET TO SEE HIS REACTION TO THOMAS DOING IT

Roman actually calling him his brother makes me happy for some reason <3

Remus regularly hides in the walls and I’m okay with this fact. Man, how many times do you think he’s gotten stuck in there??? You can make some fun claustrophobia angst with that lol.

He was probably hidden in the walls when he whispered bubba gump shrimp to Roman tbh

WHY DID WE NOT GET TO SEE REMUS’ (and Janus’ ig) THOUGHTS ON NICO?? IS THIS GONNA BE A PLOT POINT OR SOMETHING I JUST WANT REMUS TO MAKE A DIRTY JOKE ABOUT HIM

Y’all already heard most of my thoughts on the “regrets??” bit but I will say the fact that he does canonically get a rash and swollen throat is very good to me :)

Also how many times has he done the “soap in your mouth as punishment for swearing” joke and then ends up getting a bad allergic reaction?? I wanna know Thomas please bring it up later in the future.

The most sobered up and calm I’ve ever seen Remus is him saying he’d be the fresh outta jail uncle if they were doing a family role thing.

Also speaking of sober, Remus did not have one sip of wine or alcohol in general this whole video and idk if it’s just he wouldn’t drink wine and would go straight to vodka or I can fuel more of my alcoholic Janus hcs.

The question was “what do you think is gonna happen next” and Remus was talking about what was gonna happen with him while everyone else kept it pretty general. Does this bitch have a plan?? How much has he thought about this??

And ik it ended up being a joke, but I am seeing it as him making it a joke because the topic was too serious and he didn’t like it bc I want to.

I need to look up what a cystic surgery is hang on

Alright go off some people are into that.

His little smile tho <33

[dreamsy990]

so ur in the dbh fandom so whats ur take on the alice being an android twist

OH MY GOD YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT YOU JUST SIGNED UP FOR

OKOKOKOKOKOK SO I HATE THAT FUCKING THING

*inhale*

the twist adds NOTHING to the game. in fact it NEGATES from the game.

the whole point of kara and alice's story was for it to show that even android/human families can still love each other just as much as any humans would.

now HOW does alice being an android add ANYTHING to that??????????????

SPOILER ALERT, IT DOESNT.

alice being an android TAKES AWAY from the whole. loving them even if their blood isnt the same or whatever IDEA IT WAS GOING FOR. its a twist FOR THE SAKE OF A TWIST

its also just. really predictable. i remember guessing it immediately and wondering if theyd do something with it. they did not.

the only thing that is even AFFECTED by this twist is the whole uh. if you fuck up kara while escaping jericho theres a bit where you can get brought to an android camp with alice???????? thats the ONLY THING affected by this twist.

the game wouldve been better if she just. was not an android

the only other thing i can think of that might actually be changed if alice was human would be todds story/trying to get him not to expose kara at the border bus thing. and to that i say. JUST GIVE HIM CUSTODY OF THE REAL ALICE. heres uhh how i think the story shouldve played out instead to give it roughly the same ending:

alice had a relatively happy home life, until her mom walked out to go be with some fucking accountant or whatever. in the divorce, todd managed to get custody of her. todd diludes himself into thinking alice WANTED to be with her mom (whether or not its true is unclear) and takes out all his anger on her.

there you go rough idea that gives the same result. all you have to do is change alices line in on the run from "why didnt he ever love me?" to "why didn't he love me anymore?" and THERE YOU FUCKING GO

it would also make alice's being cold less annoying in retrospect because. shes genuinely cold shes a child she complains she has problems like that. androids dont feel cold and you can literally turn off her temperature sensitivity at the end.

i always found that moment just. so stupid when its revealed. like all you had to do was nothing. like instead of revealing alice is an android maybe luther wants to say that... idk alice is having nightmares and is traumatized and needs some support because shes in the middle of a war running away from home and has witnessed multiple deaths like. shes fucking traumatized. and have the moment be just kara comforting her and promising that once they cross the border it'll all be over and she'll be safe and she wont have to worry about getting hurt anymore.

as for the camp, i honestly dont know since i havent played through it yet. but i dont see how we couldn't, i dunno, have alice being kept somewhere so she can be taken to find her parents so theres a time limit and kara needs to find her before shes gone or she cant escape with her???????????? idfk i havent seen that section of the game yet. im probably gonna play it later tbh

but like. these are small changes that get rid of whats supposed to be a big twist. if your "big twist" can be removed with minimal changes, and it actively goes against the themes of what youre making, then its a bad fucking twist.

thanks for coming to my ted talk

[a-hobit]

Y’all I used to watch Danny Phantom over and over for years I loved that shit so much and so I thought “oh a trip through my nostalgia! Blorbo!”

Not as deep as I remember it being and I think my opinion on Bitch Hartman actually kind of sours a lot of my enjoyment sometimes (sexist and homophobic jokes my detested) but otherwise if anyone was thinking about rewatching it I recommend it! It’s pretty fun for most of the time and while I didn’t love a few episodes (*COUGH COUGH* IDENTITY CRISIS *COUGH COUGH*) flanderization is really apparent in DP (Skulker, Vlad, Jazz, Sam, Danny andTucker all kind of suck in their own special ways toward the end of the series) and the way that you can pick on the writing errors pretty easy is annoying it doesn’t detract from how good it is!

Other news when Danny is not out of character and horrendously down bad he is so cute I might die. Also Sam? Not as bad as I remembered her for being towards other women! She’s typically supportive but slightly judgmental rather than outright being a killjoy. It mostly frustrates me that the writing for the other women who aren’t main characters is so shallow that it makes Sam seem like the only sane one in a room often. Buuuut to be perfectly honest idk a woman born around 1995-2005 that didn’t have a not like the other girls phase sooo

But god damn does this show make me laugh! It’s so well done — so here’s a list of some of the jokes that made me actually laugh out loud!

(In no particular order)

“Dude. You are one jacked up crazy frootloop. That will never happen.”

“But back in our college days she was just Harry — Harry CHIN!? GET IT??!”

“Agh who cares about who you were in your college days? It’s who you grow into that counts. If you can be that crazy back then and turn into a super cool ghost hunter…maybe there’s hope for me yet.

Aww thanks son…but your curfew is still ten.

Awww man!” 

“Does anyone want a cookie?

*shakes head no*

THEN PERISH!!!!!”

“The reason why Danny feels like you don’t relate to him is because you never talk to him about when you were younger!

Jazz—

When you went to college— had your first date —

Jazz—!”

“I know your little secret Danny.

YoU dO?!

The lying — the sweatiness — you have a girlfrie—!

ITS A LIE IM NOT A GHOST!!!”

“*in Walkers jail looking at past enemies*

Wow a table full of people who hate me…Just like high-school.”

“I’m perfectly happy Maddie—JACK FENTON DONT YOU DARE WIZZ ON MY RUBARB! Perfectly happy…”

“A party?? For me? ‘A decade of devoice’! You all remembered!!

Of course! And we even convinced your ex husband to come!”

“*Danny staring at Sam all lovesick*

Uhhh can you watch something other than me??

*pauses*

*pulls out a picture of Sam*

*continues staring lovesick*”

“*in a gaming lab with Tucker and Danny — Sam walks in*

What are you doing here? (To Danny) She can’t be here to play…

Oh because I’m a girl? And us girls are lacking in what? Opposable thumbs? One track minds? Stupid berets?

Hey!”

“*Danny Sam and Tucker walking though school (Danny with his shirt covering his mouth)*

Is anybody looking at me funny?!

Yeah…but that’s because you look like you’re trying to eat your way through your shirt.”

“Spooky hospital…ghosts guarding the joint…still no sign that Danny is in any real danger yet!

(Danny from inside the hospital about to be dissected)

Let me go!

Still…technically not a cry for help!

HELP!!

Well—not a cry for me!

TUCKER???!!?”

“*Danny Sam and Tucker are talking in the highschool about Danny pranking Dash*

He’s going to find out it’s you.

(Danny and Tucker) Have you seen his grades? Never gonna happen!

(Dash) Hey! This iS FENTON WIPE!

(Sam) ‘Never’ is karma’s doorbell! Ding dong it’s for you!”

“I’m Sam Manson and my happy princess talent is…(glances over at Dora who looks threatening)…

Goth haiku.

DESPAIR WITHOUT END Dora’s a ghost!

UTTER BLACKNESS — NOTHINGNESS! Dora’s a ghost!!

DORA. IS. A. GHOST!!!

(Pushed off stage)”

“I’m afraid I’ll have to take it upon myself to keep Danny safe and calm until you complete the task.

Me stay with you?! Forget it!

*manifests a little thunderstorm that electrocutes Vlad*

WILL YOU QUIT DOING THAT?!?

Look on the bright side Danny! Until we get back he’s going to have to cater to your every whim and desire…

Yeah! He wouldn’t want to make you angry…

(Vlad stares at them blankly)

(Danny smiles) This pleases me!”

“*Danny is manifesting himself in Tucker’s dream and is watching Tucker live out a fantasy where he’s a billionaire spending time with two girls who look like star*

(Tucker to janitor) That will be all Fenton.

(Dream Danny) Yes sir.

(Real Danny) Wait…I’m the janitor?!?

*later*

By the way Tucker? I don’t do windows”

“*Danny is being impersonated by Morpho and is chasing ‘Danny Fenton’ though the house as the alarms blare”

The ghost defenses! That means—!

*Fentons bust in guns blazing*

Bingo Maddie!! Putrid protoplasm straight ahead!!

And he’s after our boy!

(Morpho as DF) Ah—? Oh that’s right I’m your boy—Billy!!

Danny?!”

“*after being on a cooking show with Pamela Manson*

(Maddie to Sam) I can’t believe your mother said I had bad meal presentation— so I didn’t use a parsley sprig is that a crime?!!?”

Hope you all enjoy! I’m rewatching Gravity Falls next!

[yayeetsonny]

Always Tell The Truth Part 2 ~ USWNT x Reader

Okay so if you haven’t read the first part of this, which I will put here. Always tell the truth part 1 I suggest you do that, otherwise this one will make no sense. Also sorry... again for being gone so long. I hope you guys didn’t miss me too much. :)

-N

Previously...

“Those bruises, Y/N, where’d you get them?” 

“I. Don’t. Know.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Fine then, don’t believe me. First Alex, then Christen and now you. This is just great, my teammates think I’m a liar. Well I’m not and I’m telling you the truth.”

I brushed by her and stormed out of the room, now determined to avoid my teammates so they’d stop asking questions and questioning my honesty.

“I’m not a liar. I don’t know where I got the bruises, I don’t know why they won’t believe me.”

Present

After I stormed out of the room I share with Ali I ran... yes literally ran out of the hotel and out into the street. Well okay it was more like the sidewalk but whatever, I’m going for dramatic story telling here. I was angry, hurt and confused as to why my teammates couldn’t just believe me. I’ve never lied to them before, not ever. If something was going on I would have told them. And I genuinely have no clue where these bruises came from, I don’t remember hurting myself badly in practices or games and I don’t do any other crazy activities that would warrant the sudden appearance of severe looking injuries. I knew I just needed to clear my head so I started walking in a random direction hoping to get my thoughts together.

After a while I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and knew it was probably one of my teammates looking for me so I ignored it. My phone stopped ringing only for a short time before it stared up again. This went on for several long minutes before it finally stopped. After each attempt from whoever was trying reach me there was a separate single vibrate indicating they left a message. I felt a little guilty for disappearing and probably worrying everyone but they shouldn’t have assumed or accused me of lying. Thinking they finally got the message that I didn’t want to speak to them I continued walking god knows where trying to think of what to say when I finally decided to go back. I was really deep in thought, trying to remember if and when I got the bruises. Obviously they don’t just appear like magic. They have to be caused by something, but... what? All the sudden I was hit with a vague memory

“Huh?... Wha- where am I?”

“You fell asleep on the couch dear. Don’t you remember? It was really adorable actually. My mom said super sweetly.

That’s weird, she’s never overly sweet with me, like ever.

“No, I don’t remember doing that.”

I looked around and the tv was on, which is also rare. It was playing a random comedy movie. Comedy? My parents don’t even like comedy movies.

“Oh well you did. Right after dinner, you dragged your feet over to the couch and was out like a light before we knew it.” She said casually.

My dad waltzed in like everything was totally normal. What the fuck is going on. Why don’t I even remember eating dinner? How long have I been here? Why does my body hurt so much?

I came back to the present feeling slightly uneasy. I remembered now a little bit of what happened when I got to my parents house and a little bit of what happened after I woke up from my nap. They managed to convince me everything was fine after that and I left assuming they were telling me the truth because I was too tired and too annoyed to argue. But the more I thought about it the more I wondered just how much of what they said is true. Why were there huge gaps in my time with them? And why do I get the feeling that the weird gut feeling I have isn’t a coincidence? I got lost in thought again but it was peaceful this time and quiet which I was relishing in.

Unfortunately the peace and quiet only lasted for a few minutes when I started to get what I assumed were dozens of texts. I finally got fed up and decided to silence my phone completely. When I unlocked it I saw a glimpse of some of the worried texts from the team. They all pretty much said the same thing;

“Y/N please come back. I’m sorry for saying I didn’t believe you. I’m just concerned about you. I want to talk and I’ll listen to whatever you have to say. Just please come back.”- Ali

“Hey kid, heard what happened. Wanna talk?”- T

“Y/n where are you? I heard what happened and that you left?? please come back, we’re worried.”- Christen

“Bruh what the hell? let’s talk?”- Ash

“where r u?”- Mal

“It’s not safe for you to be out by yourself. Ali told us about the other bruises. Whatever this is we’ll help you. We’re gonna start searching for you if you don’t get your ass back here soon. We love you.”- Alex

And it went on like that as every single member of the team texted me some variation of that and the voicemails they all left were much the same. I started to feel more guilty but let my anger keep me from replying to them. They can stew a little longer.

Meanwhile back at the Hotel...

CHRISTEN PRO//

“Okay, so tell us exactly what happened.”

“I saw the bruises when she was changing, which I happened to walk in on. I don’t think she was expecting me. I asked her what happened and she said that nothing had happened and I asked her about the bruises I saw on her arm, shoulder and spine and she continued to tell me she has no idea where they came from. I told her I didn’t believe her and then she got upset and she just... left.”

“Just like that? She didn’t say where she was going?”

“No, she was so angry she just stormed out and when I tried to follow after her she was already gone.”

“And she’s still not answering her phone. Damnit kid come on, where are you?”

“She’s not safe out there on her own, we have to go look for her.”

“And how are we supposed to find her when she doesn’t have her location on and is doing everything she can’t to ignore us?”

“I have no idea but we have to try.”

“We will, but we should give her a little more time. It’s possible she’s just around the corner cooling off. She’ll come back when she’s ready.”

“You’re right.”

“Guys I hate to steer us back into more serious topics but shouldn’t we be talking about the bruises she has that started all of this?”

“What do you guys think they’re from?” Megan asked.

“I want to believe her when she says she doesn’t know but I mean how can you just not know about bruises as severe as those?” Ash said.

“I mean... I’ve had some pretty bad ones I don’t remember getting from anywhere.” Mal said off-handily.

I saw some of the rest of the team nod silently, indicating that they too had, had the same thing happen to them. And I had to admit that I had my fair share of bumps and bruises that I couldn’t explain because they just seemed to appear but I was still concerned for our youngest teammate as it was getting pretty late and it was already dark outside.

“Oh god, you don’t think it’s her parents do you?” Tobin asked no one in particular.

We all paused for a moment to process what she was implying and I know we were silently hoping, praying that they wouldn’t do that to her. That they wouldn’t beat their own child.

“No, there’s no way. She’s told us that they love and support her and that even though they aren’t around much they still care about her.”

“Right, you’re right.”

“It has to be them though, I mean there’s no other explanation. She didn’t have them before or after practice right?” Alex asked.

“No, she didn’t.” Lindsey said solemnly.

“Do you really think parents can just flip a switch? Just like that? Be caring and supportive one minute and violent then next?”

“It’s possible.”

“No, just don’t even go there. I refuse to believe they would do that.”

“We would have seen the bruises if she had them before, since we all change in the same locker room together for practices and games remember?” I said

“Fuck. When I get my hands on them I swear to god...”

She didn’t get to finish her sentence because Y/n walked into the dining hall where we were all gathered.

“Get your hands on who?” She asked quietly

“Kid...”

“Y/n holy shit, thank god.”

“And she lives!... not the time? Got it.”

“Y/N... we need to talk.”

“Why? There’s nothing to talk about. I don’t know what Ali told you, but I don’t know where these fucking bruises came from okay? I don’t know. I’m sorry, I know that probably isn’t what you wanted to hear but it’s the truth. If you don’t believe me that’s fine but i’m not talking about it anymore.”

“Sweetie please just hear us out okay? We’re worried about you and getting defensive about them isn’t helping your case.” I said, trying to reach out for her but she backed away from me.

“Defensive? I’m just upset because you all still don’t seem to get it.”

“We want to get it, please just talk to us.”

“No.”

“Y/N, please just...”

“No! Okay, just no. I said we weren’t talking about it again and that’s final. What happened to “I’ll listen to whatever you have to say.” Huh, Ali? Good to know that was complete bullshit.”

“I’m sorry baby, please believe me, we just...”

“Oh believe you? For what? You clearly still don’t believe me so why should I give you that courtesy? You know what, this is all just fucking stupid anyways. I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”

And with that she disappeared up to the room she’s sharing with Ali. Leaving us all more confused and concerned than ever.

“Well... that went well.”

“Shut up Emily, so not the time.”

//End

Okay so yes that is yet another cliffhanger of sorts, I’m sorry but I thought that was a good place to end it. Just know that Y/N genuinely doesn’t remember a lot of what’s going on, just like she says. Her parents are definitely sus asf.

I’m actually writing part 3 rn so that should be up within the next day or so. I know I keep disappearing but my life is totally a mess rn lol. I’m back now tho and am excited to finally get to all the requests I have. Im so sorry for those waiting I haven’t forgotten. Promise.

-N

//

Not edited.

[sly-merlin]

KILLING ME- 14

pairing : law student!reader + yuta

genre : (fluff)  angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au.

warnings of this chapter : cursing, mention of drugs, character death.

words : ~4k

summary :

“life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”                                  

or            

“ curiousity got the cat hitched”

K.M masterlist

K.M 13

TAGLIST : @kpop-choco @moon-yuta @kawaiiayasan @btm-taeyong @exfolitae @lanadreamie @cheersskznct ​​ @hyuckiesgf ​​ @theworld-accordingtocasey ​​@simplybree

@yiyi4657 @sorrywonwoo @sillywinnergladiator   @minejungwoo @leesalts @mal-nakamoto23 @ro2424 @itlittlefangirl @nctzens-world @bl–ankhaeji @jeaneteflo @nuoyii @bralessmermaid @minhoseyeliner @tyongpoetry @swimmingkpopblog @jkjkseo @orphicmoon @floralescapes

A/N : this chapter marks the celebration of this blog surpassing 600 followers! thank you so much for all the support! also for minor readers, the sfw versions of nsfw chapters are given at the end of the masterlist so check those properly before reading.

•••••••••••••

y/n! Are you sleeping?”

Registering his words, you replied in a groggy voice,“What the fuck do you want?”

“Your phone. I left mine in the medical room. I need to call Mark right now.” with some authority, he spoke.

Whining loudly, you fell back on the bed. It was only due but flailing your arms and legs like a kid in a toy store, you let out a screech full of annoyance, cursing your fate.

Were you really going to babysit him now?

"Have you suddenly lost your hearing? Stop with this sick attitude and open the door."

A puff of air left your nose, your chest moved rhythmically with your stomach and you relaxed your arms beneath your head, eyes fixed at the fan above and ears ringing with his voice. He kept calling you and after a number of shouts, you started humming to distract yourself, afraid that you'd end up helping him otherwise. That was something, naturally, you were not interested in. Last time he had ignored your voice and now nature had presented you with an opportunity to return the favour. Just with a bit less flavour.

"Are you dead?"

"Hmmm. To you, yes I am." Mumbling, you yawned and pushed yourself up to reach your side table and fishing out your earphones from the bottom drawer, you untangled them and fixed them comfortably in your ear, hiding yourself underneath the sheets.

Sonata no.14 instantly transported you away from the noise and the stress that was your unwanted husband, yuta. The smile playing on your lips widened as you realised that you were his only mode of communication at the moment.

But You were going for a nap. Until then, he could wait. And thrash. And cry. Or die.

Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you rotated the handle of the door to walk outside but your little trip was interrupted when your body collided straight into a wall. No. The obstruction was too soft for a wall.

Opening your eyes properly, you saw yuta standing stiff. Surprised at the sudden appearance, you immediately stumbled back and in hurry, hit your spine on the wooden door. The glare of his eyes, that always spoke more than you could comprehend, coupled with a clenched jaw, was not a very pleasant sight for sure yet you found it harder to dart your own eyes away from him.

"Your phone" he seethed, breathing deeply.

"Huh?" You croaked out.

He raised his brow and in an instant, the previous scenario played like a short movie in your head. Snapping your head down, you regarded his leg with pity. He obviously noticed it immediately but seemed to ignore it and refrained from saying anything. Good for you, you thought.

"Are you deaf?"

Your furrowed brows met his eyes and with a roll of his own, he picked up his finger to force his demand but you managed to walk back inside your room before he could've done that.

Your back faced him as you contemplated your options while slowly stretching your arm to reach for your phone on the other side of the bed.

should you even be giving him your phone?

You had more trust in Taeyong than the man you shared a roof with so there was no way you were doing that.

Unbeknownst to you, yuta was watching your movements intently and the way you bobbed your head, he knew you were scheming something so he decided to be polite for a moment. Only until you were needed. Or your phone was needed.

Once the phone was in your hand, another thought crossed your mind.

"Wait. Where is the house phone?" Crossing your arms, you asked him slyly, already knowing the answer

"You fucking never got it installed. It's still in its stupid package" he seemed rather impatient.

"And you could've called reception through the door telecom. He would have phoned Mark for you. These rich apartments certainly have more hospitality tha-

"I CAN'T GO AROUND DISTRIBUTING AN UNDERGROUND CRIMINAL'S CONTACT NUMBER TO EVERYONE"

He inhaled and exhaled and you just watched until he opened his eyes again, hand reaching out to you.

"Chill. I've every right to be sceptic especially when you are the one asking for it."

Finding Mark's number on your phone, you called him.

Yuta's hand threaded through his rough hair as he noticed what you were trying to do.

"Hey mark!" Your chirpy voice resounded in the room and yuta was sure this was some different spirit speaking. You sounded too bubbly for the way you were investigating him just a second ago.

"Yes yes. His phone exactly.i don't trust him enough to hand over my phone so that's why I'm calling you myself. Just hurry up if you can or you might have to clean up a dead body in the next few hours."

With that you cut the phone. Without meeting yuta's gaze and resting your hand on the handle, you mumbled,

"He'll be here in an hour."

You were about to close the door when he stopped it with the palm of his hand, alerting you with the force.

"Tell him to get some food too."

And limping, he retired back, to the couches.

Sighing, you messaged mark. Had it been for something else, you'd have ignored but your own stomach had signalled you that it needed some good food so you chose not to fight against your own body.

Now, only the taste of the food could decide how many days you were going to tolerate that barbaric human.

"Are you still going to that stupid internship?" Johnny hesitantly murmured from your desk chair while taking big bites from the plate.

"It's not stupid please! I’m just waiting for them to actually pay attention to my awesome capabilities so they can transfer me to the main branch. This is not bad either but”, you stopped to lick your forefinger and tasting the sauce, continued, “but I really wanna go into the criminal unit. That’s where the actual fun is. As long as i’m being paid decently, i’ll suffer with the stupid research work here.”

“With the tongue as sharp as yours, I think you should be getting ready for a demotion instead” he laughed, showing you his fake bunny teeth in the most annoying and childish way.

“Ha ha ha ha. Some well wisher you are! Thank you so much for looking out for me but I'll be fine. Who knows the gatekeeper’s pay package is more than me. So it’d be a win-win in that case too I guess?” when you did a drum roll with your chopsticks to stress upon your point, he laughed harder.

"So being broke is the new black?" Rolling his eyes, he dragged out, "I swear you kids don't know how this world works."

"And you, grandpa of the century, knows?"

"I'm aware of what I need for my survival and from what I've learnt, you can either take risks or look for job security. In your case, " he fake coughed, "where the proportions of risk taking have already exceeded the acceptable limit, a job security is the best and safest option to choose."

"And that would justify my greed and desire to work for the biggest company of this city."

"Kun. The security you need and the independence you seek would be given by kun. Chois are hmm how to say? Cheap? Yeh cheap. They have no work ethics. "

"Have you worked with them, johnny?"

"No. I'm ju-

"Then was your ex a choi?" You saw his eyes comically and cutely widening at your remark.

"No. My ex wasn't a choi and that's not what I'm saying and you know that."

"Oh. So your ex wasn't a choi. Then a lee? Kim? Im? Oh my god! Look at your cheeks seo!" You dragged out. He shook his head as you kept wiggling your brows at him.

"She was a kim but that doesn't mean I would hate all kims dude. That's baseless and stop ignoring the topic. I want you to apply in Kuns. It's the best option. Do it as soon as you-

"Yeah yeah we'll see about that. First take that bitch back. I can't even nap in his presence. "

"Umm. Yeah. You gotta tolerate him. And besides he's injured. Injured yuta is like a gun without a bullet. He's gonna shout for a day or two and then peace out. He'll be sleeping and reading in his room and you won't even know if he's alive or not."

"Now that's bullshit. What is he going to do here anyway? I hope he can hop himself on one leg because even if the sun rises from the north, I am not going to do a single task for him. He can die hungry , for all I care.”

“Do you think you can endure him for some tasty dinners?”

Clicking your tongue, you quipped, “Do you really think you can buy me with a few homemade meals?”

Day 1

Yes. you were sold. The moment the tasty noodles had melted in your mouth, you knew you had no dignity. And you were indeed ashamed of yourself.

Earlier, Renjun had called you to inform you that he had delivered the food and medicines for yuta and had left your dinner box but he had failed to mention the special and endearing note that was pasted on the glass box. In the curvy letters, it read bitchy piglet and you swore the only person you’d be killing before yuta would be jaehyun. But you were going to use jaehyun to build up your tolerance instead.

When you went out to clean your dishes, he was playing some game on his phone, excitement evident from the way he was laughing every other second. Maybe if he remained occupied, he would not be so insufferable.

Day 3

"Oyii! Oyii!"

No. You were wrong. He was very very much insufferable.

At midnight, his voice echoed, disturbing your sleep. You cursed at the cool atmosphere that had prevented you from using the air con which otherwise would have blocked his annoying screeches. But it seemed like bad luck wanted to change its name to y/n instead. With your name being called like a broken record, it was a fight between you and him that you were not going to lose. Shuffling to your side, you covered your ears with the other pillow and tried to drown out the annoyingly demanding and hoarse voice. There was no way you were giving him the satisfaction of having any power over you. He could cry for all he liked!

“What the fuck do you want at this hour?”

Attempting a glare at him through sleepy lids, you spewed with irritation. Unlike you, he was very much awake, breathing with the sole purpose of making you question your whole existence.

“Pillow” scratching his non-existent beard, he mumbled.

Your nostrils flared and jaw clenched at such inconvenient command.

“You summoned me for a pillow? A pillow that can normally be found on a person’s bed? Can you please rectify your demand or did I just simply hear something wrong?”

The opened curtains and the moonlight that drenched the room was the only source that illuminated his face for you and even with drooping eyes, you could see how serious he was and yet you couldn't hold your tongue back because he simply deserved every shit you bestowed him with.

“Turn the lights on and count the pillows on my bed! And when you are done, get me some pillows from your room.” he simply stated.

“Why should i give you my pillow? I need them!”

“Because I don't use a pillow and I need it asap!”

“Then why do you suddenly need one? To disturb my sleep? Oh that makes sense.” and suddenly, your eyes had synced with your body to side with your fight mode.

“I need them for elevating my leg. The bandage is too tight and it’s not comfortable.”

“Then why don't you walk out of the room and get some cushions for yourself!” you raised your volume.

“Because my leg is in pain and i’m unable to get up? What makes you think I'm dying to see your ugly face at this time of the night. I dont wanna have nightmares of you as well but i can't help it ok!”

“you should have kept them near you. And who are you calling ugly hmm? You poop fac-

“Okay scream for all you want! But get me a pillow when your battery dies down!”

“What the fuck d- are you covering your ears? Wow ways to be generous!”

Stomping your foot, you left the room to get the hardest cushion on the couch.

“Here! Next time call Mark if you want anything. Don’t raise your voice ever again to call me because unlike you, i have work in the morning and hence I need some sleep..”

Just when you were about to leave after shoving the cushion in his hand, he spoke up again,

“This is damn hard! I asked for your pillow specifically and not th- AHH!”

A scream left him as you harshly removed the support , leaving his leg to painfully meet the mattress.

“How about you fix your attitude before fixing your leg?” suggesting, you dropped the cushion on the floor and left.

He didn't call you after that. Nor that you cared. However, the sleep in your eyes somehow vanished. Dancing on your sides didn’t help. Neither did drinking a glass of water. So, with a groan, you listened to your conscience and picked up your extra pillow that was sadly too perfect for your enemy.

Padding to his room, you tried your best to scrutinise and hearing his heavy snores, you placed the pillow right under his thigh and the cushion under his calf. Scoffing at his sleeping figure, you internally groaned to remind yourself that you hadn't done it for him. It was just a debt. For the blanket he had once covered you with. Nothing more and nothing less.

Day 5

You just wanted him out of your hair. He was just being a load on your head. At first, only the work was kicking your ass, then jungwoo was kicking you like a punching bag for an hour straight and adding to your distress was yuta.

"I'm not your maid! Stop piling up the dishes for me. I've had enough mercy on you. From today onwards, get a cleaner for yourself or buy disposable cutlery. I'm not going to clean after you!"

With a roll of his eyes, he had ignored you.

And so did you. Pasting a warning note on the sink tap, you had left for the library with a dying hope that maybe the kitchen would be spotless on your arrival or you'd be dialing some numbers in the evening.

For someone who despised the solemn atmosphere of libraries, you had successfully spent 11 hours in the said hellish room. It was 11 p.m and you wanted to sleep, more than anything but here you were, waiting for yugyeom so he'd just pick you up for a good drinking session that you were dying to have.

Fortunately, you weren't the only one who had missed living these past days. Everyone, for different reasons, was suffering so you felt a little less bad for yourself even though you knew your troubles were far more grave than their academic burdens.

"Wake up shorts" someone whispered in your ear. Squirming on your seat, you whipped your head in your sleepy state and found jungkook caressing your head, goofily smiling at you.

"I thought you wanted to hang out till the next morning" air quoting the last words, he picked up your bag.

"Yeah. Let's go. I'm all ready for a night full of vodkas." You yawned out.

"Definitely. No. You are going home. We can have a small get together me and yuggy are done with our final project." He dragged you out into the parking lot.

" I feel like it's been years since we got drunk together. You are never here anymore!" You whined at him, complaining your heart out.

"I will be. Soon. Then we can celebrate your little choi job as well."

"Oh please. Don't even mention it. If I had penny for every time they rolled their eyes at me, I'd be richer than your parents kook." You huffed out and as his gentle laugh surrounded you, you closed your eyes resting your back against the seat, expecting to be up by the time he'd park.

But the next day, you woke up tangled in the sheets of your bed, unaware of the events of the previous night.

When you had warned yuta about the dirty dishes, you hadn't expected him to fill the corners of the kitchen with disposable containers. It looked like you had missed a whole drama while sleeping in the library. The kitchen was shining except for the new utensils. But as long as you were not babysitting him, you were fine with anything. You didn't want to jinx your relief, however, you were glad you would be able to get some work done. finally.

You had spoken too early for your own good. Just when you sat down to write your paper, passionate and enthusiastic howls of that man pierced through your earphones and once again, you opened the window and hopped outside, in the balcony, ready to drown him out. Sipping on your lemonade, you gaped at the scenery the not so distant traffic provided you with and somehow, your thoughts wandered to the only person these horns reminded you of. Johnny.

What are you doing? Your fingers hovered over the text but once again, you deleted the message, declaring it to be too childish for someone as mature as him. Maybe you were just being silly. Maybe you were not. But who was going to put a stamp on your maybe?

Tears pricked your eyes as the harsh words of your senior thundered in the room. He kept shouting and you had no option than to consume each and every word he directed at you. Even if you were being insulted in front of your twenty other co-workers, staying quiet was the best option, you ascertained. so along with your saliva, you gulped your explanations down your throat.

Howsoever unconscious, you were still in the wrong. There was no excuse as to why you had mailed the wrong bills, apart from the headache that was caused by the person possibly lying on the sofa and watching t.v back home. No matter how much you tried to run away from his existence, he had somehow managed to let himself inside your head.

Glaring at the kid who asked for his turn on the park swing, you pushed yourself a little higher, letting the wind greet your stinging eyes as it hit your face in waves. Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you chose to ignore jungwoo for a day as it was the time, you decided, to let all the lessons that the past few months had taught you sink into your mind, to bleed into your soul so you won’t ever be able to deviate from them. Ever.

Only if that was so easy. You knew blaming others for your problems was no solution but trivialising them by not paying heed wasn't a smart move either.

When you reached home, your frustrations had died down. So when yuta simpered and pointed towards your empty container, telling you how he had already finished your supposed dinner, you simply rolled your eyes at him, robbing him of whatever he wanted to achieve by riling you up. Heating up the water, you were about to open the noodles packet when yeong called you.

You stared at the shattered phone screen in disbelief as the endless tears ran down your cheeks. As you verbalised the words to yourself again, your body met the floor with a thud.

Jungkook. Drugs. No more.

Three words had silenced the screeches in your head and your mind busied itself in rejecting what you had heard for it had to be a lie. But what how were you going to ignore the heart wrenching screams that yeong had let out. How were you going to dismiss the truth.

How were you all going to accept it?

••••••••••••••••

next update: Some day between 5-7 June.

[daydream-believin]

MERLIN’S APPRENTICE & MERLIN’S CHAMPION || trollhunters

warnings: swearing

a/n: if rott gave me anything it gave me this idea

I KNOW I SAID “JUICY” BUT REALLY THAT WAS JUST THE ANGST POTENTIAL,, THAT IM NOT INDULGING IN THIS POST IM SORRY LMAO

OKAY WHAT IM REALLY TALKING BOUT HERE IS A GOOD MERLIN/ARTHUR BUT IT ACTUALLY WORKS

no sorry i haven’t seen bbc merlin don’t come for me i’m ignorant

OKAY SO

we know douxie kept an eye on the human trollhunter and co

but douxie’s really having a hard time convincing himself he’s just doing his job

he’s actually enjoying this a little too much despite how boring staying in the shadows is

and he’s kinda worried?

so he’s got this bright idea: you know what would better help him keeps tabs? if he befriends this person

and so he does

fuck merlin’s shadows

sod the rules

ofc he’s very up front about knowing they’re the trollhunter and that he’s merlin’s apprentice

we wouldn’t want that to become a huge festering secret that eats douxie from the inside out until the inevitable reveal when merlin calls them both to help with the arcane order and they realize they’ve both been lying to each other’s faces for months/years and neither of them know if they could ever trust the other again, right? — phew *catches breath*

but before you know it, mr. casperan and mx. trollhunter are best friends

he’s basically the toby to your jim

and you’re very happy to have a best friend like douxie

he understands that monster hunting hustle

he’s the only person you can vent to and actually talk about what’s going on without sounding like a loon

and douxie likes being able to tell someone all his frustrations with merlin, since you’re also in that boat with him

you spar sometimes. it’s fun, but you’re very careful not to accidentally hurt your friend (he’s extremely careful not to hurt you or wound your ego by effortlessly wiping you out)

ofc, there’s the occasional, brushing of hands, faces a little too close together, accidentally winding up on top of one another, purposefully winding up on top of one another 👀 you know how sparring be

you and douxie are a duo. a duo who have become trollmarket’s resident troublemakers, to vendel’s exasperation

you guys tease each other a lot

you do a lot of stupid shit, cause hey, now you have magic armor and a magic sword and a magic best friend, did you think you wouldn’t get up to some shenanigans?

douxie is your impulse control and he’s not a very good one, as he’s just as bad

truthfully archie has the brain cell

and pranks? gods the pranks. you two are always either pranking each other or you’re teaming up to prank some other troll who said smth mean to you in the pub. vendel had to personally put a stop to it (read: chew you out)

doux thinks the world of you tho, you’re such a noble knight, and likes to tell people about how you’re a cinnamon roll, so innocent, so pure

and then they meet you and you directly contradict those statements

trollhunter: i’ve never done anything wrong in my life, ever

douxie: i know this and i love you

(spoiler: you’ve done lots and lots of wrong)

doux spends an awful lot of time slinking around trollmarket now, and he’s in the know for everything that’s happening

(no more being kept in the dark for this wizard apprentice)

and doux knows merlin won’t completely approve of this, but hey, it’s not like he’s helping and thus directly disobeying

really, he’s not helping you at all, it’s really fucking annoying

okay so mayyybe the occasional healing spell. you’ve got those puppy dog eyes he can’t say no to

but you understand his sense of duty, or whatever it is that drives a follower, technically being a follower of merlin yourself

you respect the old geezer (as you have not been turned into a half-troll yet) as a wise mythical figure, and as your best friend’s father

and what a perfect match you are for each other, champion and apprentice, mutually being screwed over by a guy you both think has all the answers

you and douxie help each other grow in your self-worths, that you two are more than the chances merlin has given to you

unfortunately, mortifyingly, you have caught feelings.

douxie has also caught feelings, and is saying nothing yep you have enough on your plate without him putting this on you so he’ll just quietly pine and suffer don’t mind him choking to death in the corner when you take off your helmet and throw back your hair

y’all’s problem really starts manifesting itself as protectiveness. you are really protective of your wizard and he is really protective of his knight

lots of things said that are Not What Friends Say but neither of you really want to be the one to point that out

lots and lots of i love yous that slowly get more and more serious until it’s not exactly platonic anymore

and it’s just really nice to have someone to get coffee (or your favored hot drink) with at four in the morning after a tussle with a troll

and that’s basically how you and douxie spend the bulk of trollhunters, just vibing

as much as you can vibe, with all the changelings and shit trying to murder you all the time

then merlin wakes up and shakes up your world

you are aware of your impending doom

you’re aware of it

merlin keeps looking you up and down like he’s mentally making up the measurements of your coffin

and tbh the idea of fighting gunmar freaks you tf out

and you’re supposed to win that fight?

gods

you’re preparing for your nightmares coming true soon

truthfully you knew your fucking job had a 100% mortality rate

you don’t want to die with regrets

so

you spill

you spill all the things you’d wanted to tell him and how much he means to you and that you couldn’t bear it if you were a goner before he knew

miraculously, douxie feels the same and tells you all the things he’d been holding back and and what you mean to him and how much he wants to protect you, that you’re gonna make it, if he had anything to say about it

and everything is perfect for one night

now you have a real reason to win

not that saving humanity isn’t a big responsibility on your shoulders and definitely A Reason

but knowing douxie’s waiting for you, for the life you’ll build together after this, the peace you’ll both have, it’s absolutely a big motivation to give your all and come out victorious and survive

hahaha loser you don’t know about the arcane order

and then merlin uses your microwave to cook a weird potion

you and merlin are alone in the house, but there’s no real mind games necessary. you may have grown past thinking he was a god, but in the end, you’re still a follower of merlin, and if merlin thinks this could give you an edge, well, who are you to question his methods

doesn’t mean you aren’t nervous as your master hands you the bottle

yet you don’t even hesitate to drown yourself in the black abyss of the tub

whatever it takes amirite?

and now you’re a half-troll

a sexy half-troll, if you do say so yourself

yeah, no ‘i’m a monster’ angst here, you’re loving the power-up

you’ve got to treat it like a cool new power-up or you will cry actually tbh i lied about the no-angst thing a new body is disorienting

your only real concern is douxie

not concerned for long tho, he sees you and the first thing out of his mouth is “nuclear!”

and he senses your concern, so he does go out of his way to assure you that boy, girl, enby, or half-troll, he loves you for your soul, darling

also again half-troll! you is hot as hell so he’s not really losing anything here 👀

he makes sure you know that too, not to let any insecurities fester

him raking his eyes up and down you gives the opposite effect of the dread merlin sent down your spine doing it

anyways,,,

doux helps out a lot more in the eternal night

like helps merlin re-defeat and re-seal morgana

he’ll do it again in few weeks but with a bigger role you know, this is practice

thank merlin for that edge YOU ARE THE LAST TROLLHUNTER YOU ARE VICTORIOUS YOUVE GOT GUNMARS HEAD IN YOUR HANDS HAHAHA

but now you’ve got to go to new jersey

douxie’s been instructed to stay in arcadia tho 🥺

it’s okay, you’ll see each other again soon

sooner than you realize

and until then you talk each other to sleep every night over the phone <3

merlins glad, actually. he’s glad hisirdoux found some solace. even if it is with the lamb he was raising for the slaughter. maybe things will go okay for them. the time map suggests it might be so

hisirdoux may have done things in a way he didn’t quite approve of, but that’s because he’s becoming his own wizard, and merlin is proud

[violetnotez]

Hi!! How are you? Idk if you've done this one before but, how would bakugou react to a s/o who actually finds him cute when he gets angry and starts insulting everyone? Like, they laugh and coo when he does that. How would he react to them? Thanks!!

Omg I love this so much 😂😂😂 cause Ive always found it so funny and jerrdlg endearing that Bakugo is so unnecessarily aggressive all the time 💀 could you imagine this buys blood pressure, like holy crao the doctors oribabky get a heart attack from how high it is 💀

Honestly, I think Bakugo at first would find it annoying and frustrating.

He doesn’t believe in feelings. Feelings are stupid, feels are dumb, feelings make people mushy and loose track of their goals. Sure, he may have started to loosen up *slightly compared to his first year at UA, but there is no way in hell is he loosing sight of his goal of being the Number One Hero. He was determined that nothing would get in the way of that-he had fought so hard and for so long , always thinking he could do better, do more, try a little harder-he wasn’t about to let his concentration falter for a second just for stupid ass crush.

But if only it were that easy. For some reason, his stupid heart had begun to beat feverishly when you were around, possessive jealousy always overtaking him when you hung out with someone other than him, his hands got clammy, and his mouth got dry...it was so annoying that he had somehow started to like you so much.

And he couldn’t accept it at first-all this time he had built himself to be an impenetrable wall, no one able to penetrate his heart or even attempt to chip at the border he had created around it. Yet you hadn’t even tried, your mere presence enough to shatter the barricade. He was going soft because of you, and a small part of him was bitter towards you because of it.

He knew it was a shitty move to do, especially since you were clueless about the whole situation, but his frustration turned into anger towards you. He would snarikly make comments towards you, hoping that his harsh demeanor would send you away.

But for some reason, you seemed to not mind it-hell, he thought at this point you actually enjoyed it. He could call you every name in the book-stupid, dumbass, Baka-and you wouldn’t bat an eye. You would laugh, smile, taunt him with your pretty looks and twinkling eyes as you quipped a comeback to him.

God, why couldn’t you just go like a nice guy?

He saw how half the boys of Class 1-A saw you, he wasn’t stupid. A lot of the guys thought you were nice, pretty, fun to be around...you were just so cheerful, always having a encouraging thing to say or a funny story to tell. It was so fucking impossible to not like you that it was irritating.

Yet here you were, bothering him, making it worse to go back to his usual self...all he could hear was the way you giggled when he blew up, your adorable little noises starkly opposite to his feral shouts. You would shake your head, cheeks round and full from smiling, sometimes his name spilling out of your lips as if he was amusing to you.

All it would do was make him even more agitated when you got like that-caused what the hell, him being a dick was supposed to make you get away from him not bring you closer? His voice would get more harsh, teeth grinding together like a wolf’s, vermillion eyes turning icy cold.

But all you did was laugh, throwing insults back at him as it was all fun and games.

“Who the hell you laughing at Baka, ha?!” hed snarl out, his voice booming like lightning.

Any sane person would shudder at the sound of his voice, yet you just continued to smile, eyes crinkling at the corners from your amusement.

“Ahh Cmon ‘Katsu, don’t be the like that!” You giggled yet again, “you’re too pretty to be making faces like that.”

“I’m not pretty you dumbass, you are-“

Oh shit. Oh fuck. Oh fuck fuck fuck. Did he really just say that?

If Bakugo could kick himself right now, he would. How dumb can he be? Now he couldn’t even keep his own damn thoughts to himself-just another stupid ass thing you do to his brain. Great.

Maybe you didn’t hear him?

Bakugo instantly turned to look at you, lips pursed to the side like a pouting child and ears tinged a bright red. That sickening feeling settled in his stomach as you looked at him with a smirk, eyes glinting with a dangerous glint, as if you just got the best blackmail over someone.

Well fucking great.

“Wait I mean-“

Bakugo instantly tried to take back his words, his words guttural and strained, teeth baring together as his chest heaved with frustration. He looked wild like a crazed animal, yet you were calm and collected, your smile as bright as ever.

“Aww you think I’m pretty??” You cooed, leaning forward on your toes to peer up at the blushing blonde.

He scoffed through his tight jaw, piercing red eyes looking up and to the side in embarrassment.

“Shut up-“

You inhaled in awe, eyelashes batting with complete amazement. It wasn’t even the fact he hadn’t denied his slip up, but that he actually complimented you that had you so in shock.

You seemed so unfazed by it, not even a blush on your cheeks or stutter in your lips. He was damn mess and you weren’t-and that irked him to his core

“Whoa so you do think I’m pretty!” you said again, a little too loud for his liking.

It was already bad enough you weren’t forgetting about it-all he needed were for some damn idiots to hear you.

“Shut your damn mouth-“ he warned, voice dangerously low as he looked around in desperation, trying to make sure nobody could hear your loud mouth.

“Damn, that’s a huge compliment coming from you-“

“I said Shut THE HELL UP-“

“What’s next, your gonna tell me you have a crush on me or something-“

“FUCK YOU-“

You simply chuckled, a shit eating grin on your face as you taunted him, obviously loving how flustered he was getting.

“Damn Katsu’, first you say I’m pretty and now you wanna do the dirty with me? A dinner would be nice first-“

It took him a second to understand what you meant, until it dawned on him..... fuck-you....

Ugh-god, you fucking sucked.

He scrunched up his eyebrows, eyes wide with embarrassment and cheeks a dangerous shade of red.

“IM DONE WITH YOUR ASS!”

He shouted out, hands balled on each side of his school trousers. You couldn’t be any more frustrating-why did you always have to be one step ahead of him? How could you always be so calm and collected, so unfazed?

He couldn’t handle this anymore, his heart ramming in his chest as he turned on heel, stomping away with the grumpiest look on his face.

All you did was simply laugh, the sound so cheerful and bright against his ears.

“Damn idiot,” he thought, his cheeks full and red like cherries, his heart beating a thousand miles a minute “the hell you gotta be so damn annoying-“

[bytedykes]

use this ask as a free pass to talk about jfa!!! what was ur favorite part/case/character/etc !! >:0

omg thank u for the pass <3 !!!!

ok omg i did like the lost turnabout i thought it was stupid (affectionate) but entertaining, i assume they just did that to refresh how to actually play the game for the player? either way it was so dumb absolute 10/10, i wouldn't give it up for anything. phoenix is already dumb in court always but no memory phoenix being dumb in court? amazing. showstopping. unparalleled. also i like maggey :) <3

episode 2!!! aaaaaaauughhh i really liked this one too! i love pearly she's my baby she's my favorite little girl she's the one and only <3 i want to put her in a centrifuge (affectionate) also i think franziska is introduced in this case right ? i love her as well she's one of the most mean lesbians of all time

umm about the case itself i was rlly into them showing more feys! i liked getting to explore more or kurain village and they feys' family dynamics etc, i think ini/mimi and morgan working together to do evil tm was done well! i like ini also. absolute rocks for brains girlie i want to draw her but havent yet <3 AND MIMI, i felt so proud of myself when i was putting the clues together akkadajdsk!! im generally rlly into all of aa's sibling dynamics so this was like a little treat for me <3 stealing ur dead sister's identity and faking your own death… real !

yeah tho the way they developed the fey family lore in this case. very good. im a fan <3

its been a while since i actually played case 2 because cases 3 and 4 took me like a month each 😭 im missing a lot about it probably but ghjhdjdjf i also liked seeing lotta again, she's one of my beloved side characters and it was nice to see her again! god my brain is so empty. the magatama being introduced in this case! also very cool, i had to google how to use it because im stupid but once i figured it out i thought it was really neat and had fun with that

(also mia's boobs becoming plot relevant in this case?? mkjskd also A Moment for sure)

(omg i just remembered pearly ran from kurain village to the courthouse in this case? just straight up sprinted? she's an icon she's so real she IS the moment!!! 💞)

ok case 3 i hate case three <3 i hate it i hate it i hate ittttt sooo much!!! doubly mad about it because i am a circus + clown enjoyer and around the time i was playing it i got to see a history of circus museum so like UGH turnabout big top could have been genuinely so good but it just wasnt! it was gross! :/ all the characters rlly did have like potential to be cool and interesting but instead they were all child predators like come on 😭 the one decent guy is the murderer (i was excited for seeing a wheelchair user too :( but nooo we cant have good things in the aa circus!!!) and hjhfdjshj idk <3 yeah least favorite case for sure. my friend warned me it was gonna be bad but no one could have truly made me understand how bad it was until i played it lmao. genuinely like its even shittier bc it COULD HAVE been good :(

(i did like some of the franziska moments in case 3 tho… shes a shithead and i love her <3)

CASE 4 MY BELOVED i loved case 4!!! going to try to organize these thoughts a little because its freshest on my mind and i have the most to say about it lol

will powers!! i was excited that they brought back will powers, he's another side character im an enjoyer of, and i liked seeing him :) and lotta again!! i love her <3

i love pearly in this case she's sooo <33 i love her! she's so cute and makes me sad sometimes i want to hold her

engarde ! he was cool! i like the whole stage persona thing, the constant fucking repetition of "refreshing like a spring breeze" got so annoying but like in a satisfying way? like. jdhfjd it was annoying bc it was supposed to be i guess, not bc the writing was bad if that makes sense? i liked his twist, i liked the stupid sprite of him pushing his bangs out of his face, i like the random materialization of the brandy(?) glass, i like?? his general cuntiness?? sdsdskd idk he was fun i liked him as a character and as a villain

OHH i was. hm i dont wanna be like i was a fan of the misogyny but hghdjfj i felt very strongly about how both corrida and engarde were shithead assholes and how willing both of them were to like. use this woman's life and death for their own gain. and how that affected adrian and subsequently maya… idk!!! lots of thoughts but no words, but that did feel well written to me and definitely made me feel strong things

also i really like how in aa1 phoenix breaks down zero doors but in aa2 he breaks down two doors. 10/10. let this man break down doors

edgeworth trying to give ppl (mainly phoenix) life advice throughout this case is?? so funny? i get he went on his self actualization and learned the real meaning of being a lawyer etc but hguhjfdhjd miles "i heart repressing my emotions" edgeworth?? claiming to be well adjusted and qualified to give others advice?? hilarious. 10/10. even better that it actually WORKS on phoenix ubfdjhdjfh

(not saying edgeworth DIDN'T successfully work on his emotional state and go to therapy etc but like. come on. its edgeworth. u know what i mean lol)

THE AFTERCREDITS SCENE BROKE ME LMAO everything about it makes me want to put my head thru a wall <3 franziska and miles interacting in general, her telling him that she will no longer be living in his shadow, her crying sprite, her leaving for germany, THE FOURTH PIECE OF EVIDENCE CARD AAAAAAA it fucked me up it really did!! maya drawing nick on the card she found while she's kidnapped really made me feel things! they are siblings your honor!!! i have so many feelings about this and the way it was set up + revealed but aghhh i cant put any of them to words it just made me yell really loud and screenshot the card a hundred times !

uhh yeah those are most of my thoughts i think!! tldr i liked this game it was fun (aside from case 3 the motherfucker) and id play it again for sure!! my favorite case was two i think, four is a close second but even knowing how it would end (im not immune to scrolling the aa tag for hours and getting spoilered rip) it was pretty stressful with the kidnapping djdjdj

yeah :) good game good game

[tigerdrop]

Cringe is dead, talk to me about the funny half-life men and their relationship

okay here is my essay. it is titled These Guys Actually Like Each Other, and Gordon Freeman Is Just Kind Of A Dick*

(disclaimer: these are just my 2 cents. dont take me too seriously! im just some guy online who has watched this shit too many times.)

first things first. these guys actually like each other. this is a key aspect of their relationship. benrey, obviously and textually, digs gordon freeman - you dont flirt that heavily with guys you arent into, and so much of what he says and does is geared around making gordon crack up. thats pretty gay.

but the counterpart to this is that gordon freemans pretty fucking gay for benrey, too. you may say, “oh, but word of god says its not requited!” and to you i will say: bull shit. gordon is uniquely obsessed with benrey compared to all the other characters. if gordon didnt like the fucking guy, he wouldnt giggle with him and share in-jokes with him and bring him up every 5 seconds when benreys not around. thats concern, bro. thats worry. thats real shit

but i cant blame people for thinking that gordon freeman genuinely doesnt like benrey. benreys partially responsible for some of the worst things that have happened to him, the Arm Thing among them. and gordons very insistent afterward that he doesnt like benrey. he even goes so far as to try to kill benrey a couple times. to this, i must argue that gordon freeman is just kind of a dick.

lets talk facts here. canon. Lore. from the moment we hop into gordons shoes, we can see that he is a jerk to every npc on his way into black mesa. this is his default: a dude who just runs his mouth and says rude shit. he calls tommy a freak within 5 minutes of meeting him. he infantilizes the guy and barely considers him a real scientist. he doubts that bubby is a real name for like no fuckin reason. in “real life”, this is because its funny, and wayne is trying to make a funny half-life stream. in a textual sense, this is because gordon “hlvrai” freeman is a dick. this is the way he acts, consistently, throughout the series.

(brief aside: this is why the whole “gordon is a nice guy and a great dad” characterization baffles me. the way he actually acts in canon is, in short, bitchy and lacking in self-awareness. and i love that for him, i really do. it makes the moments where he just tries to be a nice guy stand out. but thats the thing: his intermittent moments of decency and kindness are not the whole of his personality! this dude kind of sucks most of the time!)

the way that gordons general asshole attitude extends to benrey is complicated. in fairness, benrey makes it his job to annoy the shit out of gordon as much as possible, and that warrants a negative attitude, but gordons pretty paranoid and ends up blaming benrey for nearly everything that happens to him, regardless of if its warranted. this is a pattern he exhibits both before and after the Arm Thing. its a little bit of a dick move! especially considering that, prior to the whole “betrayal” subplot (which was not exactly planned very far in advance), benrey is no more malicious or annoying than anybody else gordons having to travel with.

(okay, this is kind of a subjective evaluation, but still. my point stands that benrey is not any more of a hindrance to his progress than anybody else in the science crew, and neither is he particularly more violent or murderous. hell, gordon freeman has probably killed more guys than benrey. benrey just tends to get.......special treatment.)

all that said, i am still convinced that gordon really fucking likes benrey. please consider with me the following: it would be remarkably easy for gordon to just ignore him and do what he has to do, but he doesnt. he could stop engaging. he could stop thinking about benrey. he could stop bringing benrey up to the rest of the crew every time benrey leaves to do his own thing for awhile. but he doesnt. and, again, yeah, the extra-textual reason for this is “two guys are doing an improv comedy thing and bouncing off of scorpy is kind of the point”, but within the text it reads to me as gordon not being about to get the dude off his mind.

and this is in addition to all the times we see gordon being genuinely nice and receptive toward benrey! its in the little things: laughing the hardest and longest at benreys jokes. only ever reciprocating that stupid underwater “BBBBB” thing with benrey. trying to catch benrey when he falls, despite his insistence moments earlier that benrey should hop in the wack ass crystal generator and get hypermurdered. fondly remarking that benreys sweet voice sounds beautiful. his sort of flustered responses to most of benreys overt flirting. none of this is the way normal people react to a guy they hate. this is all fuckin gay to me, man.

its this combination of the outward insistence that gordon hates benrey with his inner eagerness to be around him and think about him and engage with him that gives off strong “repression” vibes, to me. for whatever reason - pride, embarrassment, resentment - gordon maintains a front of hating the guy and wanting to kill him for a lot of the series, but it doesnt gel with the way he fucking giggles and plays along half the time that benrey starts fucking with him. its a game, and that game is one of the only ways gordon knows to manifest affection for him.

(remember “oh my god, hes got a knife!”? that was the gayest shit i ever seen in my life. tittering like a schoolgirl while benrey chases him around like “im gonna get you haha”. insanity.)

the cool thing about repression is that you can have it manifest in a lot of ways! and this is where things like “headcanons” and “my own personal affection for repressed bisexual men” come in. a lot of how i characterize their relationship is an extrapolation of a lot of things like gordons canonical insecurity issues/anxiety, gordons whole anti-bootboy thing screaming “internet wokeboy who means well but probably has a lot of repressed baggage” to me, etc.

how do you get massive amounts of sexual repression out of what you see in canon, you might ask? well. if wayne would stop having gordon talking about being jerked off by the suit, or talking about chugging a 40-gal drum of potion and having to hold his piss, or worrying about being eaten by benrey the moment he sees benrey at setscale 10, maybe i would have a higher opinion of gordon “hlvrai” freeman and whatever latent psychosexual issues hes got going on. but here we are

i havent even touched yet upon how benrey feels about gordon. this one is helpfully made a little more plain by the fact that benrey very much wants to suck his dick in canon. (i dont even have to go into details. we all know.) but IMO the best part about this ship isnt just that they dig each other, but how. benrey gets overtly flirtatious in the second half of the series, but IMO his preferred method of flirting is just fucking with gordon: chasing him with knives, shoving him around in a bathroom, trying to get scans of his feet. but all in like a slapstick, giggly, fun-and-games sense, you know? at least when it works.

a lot of the time, though, it doesnt work out that way. he clearly just likes doing it whether or not gordon responds positively. which is, you know, Weird. not very nice. but also in line with the way everybody else treats gordon freeman. gordons kind of the universes chew toy in any given universe, and the same holds true here. hes kind of helpless......subjected to 4 demons attempting to make his life as difficult as possible. in a way its cathartic.

sorry. i got sidetracked. anyway, benrey very much likes to mess with him and unnerve him and demean him and i will be perfectly frank with you: that is hot. i have problems and illnesses and one of them is that i am a masochist who goes crazy for that kind of thing. calling gordon a “dirty lil boy” and telling him to “look at the mess [he] made” is some straight up kink scene shit.

i like to imagine that a lot of this behavior isnt caused just by the guy who played him wanting to be funny and antagonistic, but by benrey as a character not really understanding what constitutes “pushing a joke too far”. hes not human, and whatever he is doesnt have a very normative way of understanding the world around him, full of people who actually get hurt for real and die for real. benrey expresses what seems to be genuine surprise and distress after the Arm Thing, as if he didnt know that his actions would have serious consequences. and it doesnt seem to fully sink in afterward, either.

it reads a lot to me like hes used to video game rules and treating people around him like NPCs. if they get hurt, its no big deal, because its not real. he likes jamming random buttons on gordons interface and seeing what comes out. its probably a lot of fun for him, the same way that seeing a streamer or a youtuber suffer for our amusement is fun. its like, you know, in my opinion, gordons very cute when hes frazzled. hes also cute when hes laughing. pushing gordons buttons has a 50/50 chance of either of these things. and this is how he ultimately flirts with gordon: by pulling his pigtails.

but at the same time, benrey does legit care about gordon and knows some boundaries. benreys the one most often shooting at enemies to protect gordon, and he spent most of the last act trying to convince gordon to turn around and not fight him because they were friends (best friends, to be specific). he just lacks a lot of the emotional intelligence it would take to express the feeling of “he digs gordon and likes seeing his face get all red and sweaty regardless of the cause”. and gordon lacks the emotional intelligence it would take to express the fact that he doesnt know if he likes or hates benrey and hes scared as hell that its the former

because, lets be real. unironic benrey-liking is a sign of problems disorder. just look at all these words ive written about it.

can you imagine? this bizarrely powerful, non-human entity that can shrug off gunfire and grow to the size of a building has decided that youre his new plaything. benreys the bored guy booting up skyrim and fucking around in the console, and gordons the hapless favorite follower that hes taken a liking to. its a really fun dynamic IMO

after all this, its safe to say my title is a little misleading. the asterisk stands for * and So Is Benrey, Actually. they are both kind of awful dudes who thrive off of teasing each other and they deserve each other. and i am crazy about it. thank u for coming to my TED talk