#group of 4 horribly wronged by the system and FURIOUS

[bookwyrminspiration]

What if when Sophie came to the lost cities the black swan had been overthrown, and their leaders arrested. So by the time she arrived, she doesn’t have that same support. I think it’d take the story in a crazy, but fun new direction.

oh that would be very interesting--not only would she have significantly less guidance at the start of the series, but depending on how the Black Swan were handled, the attitude towards Sophie could be quite different; she'd be the product of known convicted criminals, not just the odd human girl.

She was observed when she first arrived, but I imagine that would've been much more intense in this situation. I wonder when she would've arrived, actually. Because Alden didn't find Sophie by his own work, Mr. Forkle led him to her. So without him, when on earth would Sophie have been brought to their world? Would they have discovered that sort of information through a mind break and located her around the same time, or would years pass?

I'm imagining the Mr. Forkle who posed as her neighbor might've escaped being arrest, which would create an interesting dynamic with her having one singular influence and resource.

But that aside, without the rest of the Black Swan able to work masterfully behind the scenes, there'd be no notes, no clues to prompt hidden memories. It would require a lot more work on Sophie's part to figure things out--which, depending on when she was brought to the lost cities and how (agreeing it was the best decision vs council forcing her, for example), she may or may not be capable of.

I'm also curious how that would impact her morals and sense of right; we see her learning from and guided by the Black Swan for most of the series before she branches out, following their methodology and beliefs on the limits. If they were never there, what's stopping her from going a step further much sooner? Especially if she's being more heavily monitored/judged and in order to make any impact she has to push harder--side note: I feel like in that case she might become similar to Tam in her disdain, she didn't do anything but exist and need help and this is what they did?

Would she be allowed to attend Foxfire with a significant association with a serious criminal organization? Even if she hasn't done anything yet, she might. And if she doesn't go to Foxfire (or is too old when brought), her friend group would be entirely different. She might not even have a friend group and it would instead be her against the world, perhaps a few misfits gathered along the way. Fitz might still be around because he found her, but Biana might stay bratty. She wouldn't meet Marella or Jensi, and she wouldn't have been adopted by the Ruewens (because confirmed huge Black Swan association when he thinks they killed Jolie? no way) so no meeting Dex. If she doesn't go to Foxfire, I could see them sending her to Exillium, in which case she might keep Tam and Linh as friends--but with a very different dynamic, since I think Sophie would be incredibly bitter.

Actually now that I'm thinking about this maybe she'd be picked up by the Neverseen. At least temporarily and in the same way that Rayni was--not that she's for their atrocities, but because they extended a hand when no one else did. Which!! Could then be an interesting exploration on how she wasn't a criminal, but via seeing her as one/as dangerous they limited her options and made her into one. She wouldn't have joined the Neverseen if they'd treated her properly, but they didn't, so now she did. Except they don't see it as their fault, as a consequence of their boxing her in, but instead as confirmation of what they always feared.

indeed, Nonsie, there is a lot of potential for a very different but fascinating story here. I've barely scratched the surface of all the implications and everything you could do with it!

[excalculus]

I saw some mentions of rabies going around again and have no clue what's set it off this time, but given recent scientific developments I want to revisit the idea of curing symptomatic rabies.

First things first: there is still no practical way to do this. The famous Milwaukee Protocol fails far more frequently than it succeeds, and even the successes are not making it out in anything like a normal state. It's been argued that it should no longer be considered a valid treatment [1] due to these issues; any continued use is because there's literally nothing else on the table.

However. There are now two separate studies showing it's possible to cure rabies in mice after the onset of symptoms. The lengths you have to go to in order to pull this off are drastic, to put it mildly, and couldn't really be adapted to humans even if you wanted to. But proof of concept is now on the board.

long post under the cut, warnings for animal experimentation and animal death. full bibliography at the end and first mention of each source links to paper.

Quick recap - rabies is a viral disease of mammals usually transmitted through the saliva of an infected animal. From a contaminated bite wound, it propagates slowly for anywhere from days to months until it reaches the central nervous system (CNS). Post-exposure vaccination can head it off during this phase, but once it reaches the CNS and neurological symptoms appear it's game over. There will typically be a prodromal phase where the animal doesn't act right - out at the wrong time of day, disoriented, abnormally friendly, etc. This will then progress to the furious (stereotypical "mad dog" disease) and/or paralytic phases, with death eventually caused by either seizures or paralysis of the muscles needed for breathing.

That's the course we're familiar with in larger animals. Mice, though, are fragile little creatures with fast metabolisms.

In the first study's rabies infection model, lab mice show rabies virus in the spinal cord by day 4 after infection and in the brain by day 5. Weight loss and slower movement start by day 7, paralysis starting from the hind limbs from day 8 on, and if not euthanized first they're dead by day 10-13. [2]

This study (fittingly conducted at the Institut Pasteur) had two human monoclonal antibodies, and wanted to see if there was any possibility they could be used to cure rabies after what we think of as the point of no return.

Injecting the antibodies into muscle saved some mice if done at days 2 or 4, and none if done later, even at high doses of 20 milligrams per kilogram of body weight of each. Conclusion: targeting the virus out in the rest of the body is no use if it's already replicating in the CNS.

Getting a drug past the blood-brain barrier is, to use a highly technical term, really fucking hard. It's the sort of problem that even the best-funded labs and biggest companies in the world routinely fail at. And that's for small molecule drugs, which are puny compared to antibodies.

But this isn't drug development for a clinical trial. This is a very, very early proof-of-concept attempt, which means you're willing to ignore practicality to see if this idea is even remotely workable. So you can do things like brute force the issue by cutting through the skull to implant a microinfusion pump, which lets you deliver the antibodies directly into the normally-protected space around the brain. Combine this with the normal injections, and you can treat both the CNS and the rest of the body at the same time. Here's a survival graph of treated mice. X axis is days, Y axis is percentage of mice in that group still alive.

Figure 2A from reference 2, accessed February 2024

The fact that the blue, green, and purple lines did anything other than sink horribly to zero is unheard of. When the combination treatment was started at day 6, 100% of the mice survived. Started at day 7 (prodromal phase), 5 out of 9 mice recovered and survived. Started at day 8 (solidly symptomatic, paralysis already starting to set in), 5 of 15 mice recovered and survived. And when they say "survived", they kept these mice all the way to day 100 to make sure. Some of them had permanent minor paralysis but largely they were back to being normal mice doing normal mouse things. So, success, but by pretty extreme means.

Enter the second paper [3]. This was a different approach using a single human monoclonal antibody against Australian bat lyssavirus (ABLV - closely related to rabies, similar symptoms in humans) to try for a cure without needing to deliver treatments directly into the CNS. They also made a luminescent version of ABLV that let them directly image viral activity, so they could see both where the virus was replicating and how much there was in a live mouse.

Figure 1 from reference 3, accessed February 2024

Mice infected with ABLV start showing symptoms around day 8. You can see in the figure that at day 3 there's viral replication in the foot at the site of infection, which has shifted into the spine and brain by day 10. So what happens if you give one of these doomed mice one single injection of the antibody into the body?

Done at day 3, the virus doesn't make it to the brain until day 14, and while disease does set in after that around 30% of the mice survive. Days 5 and 7 are much more interesting. Those mice still develop symptoms at day 8, but the imaging shows the amount of virus in their spines and brains never gets anywhere near the levels seen in untreated controls, and within days it starts to decrease. Around 80% of day 5 and 100% of day 7 mice survive.

Okay, sure, you can stop another lyssavirus, but technically you did start treatment before symptoms appeared. What about symptomatic rabies?

The rodent-adapted rabies strain CVS-11 starts causing symptoms as early as day 3 after infection, and untreated mice die between days 8 and 11. The same single dose of antibody saved 67% of mice treated on day 5 and 50% of mice treated on day 7. Without making the luminescent version of the virus there's no real-time imaging of the infection, but you can still track symptoms.

Figure 2 from reference 3, accessed February 2024. CVS-11 is the name of the rodent rabies strain and F11 is the name of the antibody.

Disease score is a combination of several metrics including things like whether the mice are behaving normally and whether they show signs of paralysis. In untreated mice it goes up and up, and then they die. If one of those lines starts coming back down and continues past day 10 or so, that's a mouse that recovered. The success rate isn't as good as against ABLV, but again, this is a rabies strain specifically adapted to rodents and treatment wasn't started until it was well-established in the CNS.

So how on earth is this happening? The antibody neutralizes both ABLV and rabies really well in a test tube, but we've already established that there's no way a huge lumbering antibody is making it past the blood-brain barrier without serious help. Something about the immune response is clearly making it in there though. And it turns out that if you start trying this cure in mice missing various parts of their immune systems, mice without CD4+ T cells don't survive even with the treatment. By contrast mice without CD8+ T cells take longer to work through the infection, but they eventually manage it and are immune to reinfection afterwards.

To grossly oversimplify the immune system here, CD4+ are mature helper T cells, which work mostly by activating other immune cells like macrophages (white blood cells) and CD8+ T cells (killer T cells) against a threat.

Normally, T cells are also kept out by the blood-brain barrier, but we know that in certain specific cases including viral infection they can pass it to migrate into the brain. In the brains of the infected mice for which antibody treatment either wasn't given or didn't work, you can find a roughly even mix of CD8+ and CD4+ T cells along with a whole lot of viral RNA. But in the brains of those successfully fighting off the infection, there's less viral RNA and the cells are almost exclusively CD4+. So the antibody doesn't work by neutralizing the virus directly - something about it is activating the animal's own immune system in a way that gives it a fighting chance.

Again, neither of these proof of concept treatments is really workable yet as a real world cure. The first one is almost hilariously overkill and still has a pretty good chance of failure. The second is less invasive but careful sequencing still shows both low-level viral replication and signs of immune response in the brains of the survivors even at day 139, so it may not be truly clearing the virus so much as trading a death sentence for life with a low-level chronic infection. But now we know that 1. curing rabies after symptoms begin is at least theoretically possible, and 2. we have some clues as to mechanisms to investigate further.

Not today. Not tomorrow. But maybe not never, either.

References:

Zeiler, F. A., & Jackson, A. C. (2016). Critical appraisal of the Milwaukee protocol for rabies: this failed approach should be abandoned. Canadian Journal of Neurological Sciences, 43(1), 44-51.

de Melo, G. D., Sonthonnax, F., Lepousez, G., Jouvion, G., Minola, A., Zatta, F., ... & Bourhy, H. (2020). A combination of two human monoclonal antibodies cures symptomatic rabies. EMBO molecular medicine, 12(11), e12628.

Mastraccio, K. E., Huaman, C., Coggins, S. A. A., Clouse, C., Rader, M., Yan, L., ... & Schaefer, B. C. (2023). mAb therapy controls CNS‐resident lyssavirus infection via a CD4 T cell‐dependent mechanism. EMBO Molecular Medicine, 15(10), e16394.

[milstrim]

Comfort in My Shadow

Chapter 2: Right Through You

By @iwritedumbshit for @iron-mum

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Minor Pepper Potts/Tony Stark

Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, Ned Leeds, James “Rhodey” Rhodes

Summary: Soulmates are definite in the universe. Nobody knows exactly why they exist, or what dictates who is bonded to who, the only thing known is that they are never wrong. But Peter’s not so sure about that.

Living at the group home had taught Peter a lot about laying low and how to stay alive when nobody cares. But he’d always clung to the hope of the shadow at his feet reflecting his soulmate that had watched over him for years.

Typical that his soulmate is actually a superhero that Peter is convinced shouldn’t want anything to do with him. Maybe, just this once, the Universe was wrong.

But Tony Stark is desperate to prove that it is right.

Ch 1 // Ch 3 // Ch 4 // Ch 5 // Ch 6 // Ch 7 // Ch 8

---

"I'm sorry." It was the last thing Spider-Man said before he swung away, swallowed by the darkness of an alleyway. It was a whimpered choke. Fearful.

"No! Wait--" Tony tried to call, but it was too late. The man was gone. No. Not a man. A fifteen year old. Tony glanced down at his shadow and then back at where Spider-Man had disappeared. Spider-Man was his soulmate. And he was fifteen. Tony had to catch himself against the wall as his chest squeezed painfully tight and his throat closed up in panic, barely managing to mutter out, "Jesus Christ. Fifteen."

That was horrifying on an entirely different level than what had just transpired. Not only had his soulmate flinched away from him and then run off the first chance he'd gotten, he was swinging around the streets of New York and putting himself in danger and he was a kid. Did his parents know? Maybe that was why the kid had run off so quickly. He'd freaked out so horribly when he'd realized the time that Tony had to blink away the horrible memories of his own father with his backhanded slaps and harsh words that had stung even more.

Tony sucked in a cold breath as he stared at the spilled hot chocolate mixing with his own dropped coffee. How often had Spider-Man been hurt? On the street or at home? Suddenly all Tony knew was terror at the implication and newfound knowledge of just exactly who his soul was connected to. Just who the shadow that had been with him for fifteen years really had been. And all he knew was the horrible guilt that he clearly wasn't what his soulmate had been looking for. Could soulmates be wrong? Knowing himself, it was possible.

The mechanic shook his head furiously, forcing himself to stop leaning on the wall and take a deep breath. He'd found his soulmate--sort of--and he wasn't about to just let them go that easily. If he could just have one good conversation, preferably without that mask, about their connection, everything would be okay. Or, it could at least be resolved. If the kid didn't want to know him, didn't want to be his soulmate--well...

Tony sniffed, snatching the cups off of the pavement and throwing them in the trash. He'd cross that bridge when he got to it.

Tony began to make his way back to the tower, his steps slow and stumbled, eyes fixated on his shadow whenever it came into view. After a few minutes, the hood disappeared and fuzzy hair took its place. Well, now he knew why his shadow always looked like they were bald in the afternoon and at night.

"Friday," Tony started, his glasses lighting up at the call of his voice. "I need a full search of the city. As in-depth as you can get it. Follow Spider-Man, look for his identity, and focus on kids born on August tenth, 2001."

"There are six hundred thirteen people born on that day currently living in New York."

"Okay, filter out for boys in Queens. Between 5'7" and 5'9."" He paused, thinking about the fingers that he'd seen through Spider-Man's gloves. "Lighter skin, too."

"I have forty-two possible matches."

"Well, it's better than six hundred," Tony sniffed. "Keep an eye on them, and keep a special eye on Spidey. If he looks like he's in a situation he can't handle, alert me. Or just tell me the next time he pops up."

"Of course, sir," Friday agreed. "What shall I file this under?"

Tony mused for a moment. "Create a new file, and place it on my private server. Name it 'The Itsy Bitsy Spider.'"

Hopefully he'd have a face to that protocol soon.

 ---

  Peter stumbled up to the front door of the Queens Pinehill Group Home for Boys, his breaths quick and furious as he scrambled for a decision. After escaping from Mr. Stark's disappointment, he'd fled across the bridge and eventually found an alleyway to change into where his spidey sense had finally calmed down. Cameras were following Peter now wherever he went as Spider-Man now, he was sure, so he'd had to be painfully and slowly careful. Finding an alleyway out of the sight of any cameras had been simple enough, but it would be relatively easy for Mr. Stark to triangulate his location, so Peter had changed and thrown on a hood and forced himself to become lost in the New York crowd of people on the night shift or party-goers higher than a kite.

So far, the teenager thought he'd managed to get away with it, but he'd have to be more careful about when he went out if he didn't want Mr. Stark to find out who he was. The man already seemed disappointed to find out his soulmate was Spider-Man, he couldn't imagine what realizing it was actually Peter Parker would do to him.

Peter swallowed down the trepidation that bubbled under his skin in boiled anxiety as he shuffled in front of the door to the group home. Maybe Mr. Fowler hadn't realized he was late and he could try and sneak in through the window instead of being caught outside the door. Then again, if he did know, he was likely waiting for Peter to slip in that way and catch him red-handed. The real question was what would end in less punishment?

The teenager's musings were cut short by a spike in spidey sense and the wrenching open of the chipped red door, bringing with it the dangerous stench of stale beer. Mr. Fowler's displeased grin froze Peter to the floor in terror until an outstretched hand reached out and gripped his arm in a vice. "You're late."

Peter held back a wince as he was pulled in through the door, forcing himself to stumble along as the door was slammed shut behind him, rattling the old building. Mr. Fowler dragged him towards the dining room as he rushed to apologize. "Sorry, Mr. Fowler. I--I didn't mean to! I just got caught up on the subway and my phone died and--"

"I've heard that one before," the man snapped. Peter's jaw clamped shut with an audible click. He bit his tongue to keep his feeble excuses from escaping as he was pushed into a chair roughly. The man's hand gripped onto Peter's shoulder painfully tightly, but the liquor on his breath kept the boy glued to the chair more obediently than anything else. "Now where have you actually been, Peter?"

"I-I didn't mean to be late," he tried again. "I was just--"

There was a harsh smack to the back of his head, whipping it forward. Peter winced, but it didn't really hurt, so he forced himself to sit still. He was fine. Mr. Fowler couldn't really hurt him, and even if he did, it didn't matter. Peter would heal. Every bruise he'd ever gotten here had always been gone by the morning.

"Enough with the excuses, Pete," Mr. Fowler ordered. "I just need an answer for the report now that I have to write up your next strike."

Peter flinched. The system at the Queens Pinehill Group Home for Boys was extremely strict. Three strikes and you're out. Peter already had one strike when Mr. Fowler had caught him sneaking an extra snack after dinner. He'd been drunk then too.

Four strikes meant that Peter would be moved to another home for "troubled teens." That he'd attend another school and have to forge a new system of being Spider-Man. And, most importantly, it meant he'd be leaving the younger kids here to Mr. Fowler's wrath by themselves. Peter was the second oldest at the group home of six. Jeremiah was the oldest, but he'd be aging out in barely a month, leaving Peter to try and take care of the others, all no older than twelve.

Peter would heal, they wouldn't. It was as easy as that. But it didn't seem like Peter was going to escape this strike and that he'd have to be careful about even thinking about patrolling for a few weeks. Then again, with Mr. Stark possibly looking for him, maybe it was for the best. And it would just be for a little bit. Just a little bit.

There was a horrible shiver up the teenager's spine, and Peter had to force himself to stay still as there was another slap to his head, this one harder than before. He bit his lip as Mr. Fowler leaned in closer, the staleness of liquor on his breath making the boy's nose crinkle in barely concealed disgust.

"Listen to me when I'm talking to you, son," Mr. Fowler sneered. "Failure to do so can end in another strike, y'know. Two in one day and you'll be shipped off to Jersey tomorrow morning. So?"

Peter took a deep breath through his nose and grit his teeth. He knew what the man wanted to hear. What he wanted to put in Peter's file. It seemed to be a personal pleasure of his to fuck with his file, and all the other boys' really, as much as humanly possible.

"I was out goofing off with some friends. We were smoking and throwing cans at cars and I lost track of time."

Mr. Fowler tutted. "So irresponsible, Pete. I will have to write that up, y'know, and you'll receive the usual grounding. One week. Now why don't you go and head to bed?"

It wasn't a question, so Peter stood shakily and forced himself near the stairs, knowing better than to ask if he'd get some kind of food before he went to sleep. He wouldn't be getting any dinner for the entirety of his grounding anyway. Peter was lucky that he got away without any bruises, instead only escaping with a dull pain in the back of his head.

He slipped up the stairs and into the room he shared with Jeremiah and Tim. Jeremiah had his back turned to Peter, clearly just fixed to keep his head down for the next month, but Tim was sat up straight in bed, bright black eyes staring at Peter in awed worry. The teenager forced himself to look away, instinctively turning to his dull shadow but snapping away from that as well to stare at his bed instead.

"Go to sleep, Tim. You have school tomorrow."

"But, Peter--"

"Go to sleep, Tim," he said again, a little more forcefully this time. Tim stared at him for another painful moment before slipping down under his covers and turning to face the wall opposite Peter. It dragged a stone of guilt into his stomach, but Peter just couldn't at the moment. Even as he changed out of his ratty clothes into even rattier pajamas, the new knowledge of who his shadow really was wouldn't leave.

Peter turned the light off in the hall and closed the door to him and the other boys' room, grateful for the first time in his life to see his shadow disappear. He knew he was being just a little ridiculous, it wasn't like Mr. Stark hated him or anything, at least, Peter didn't think he did. But, well, the teenager was exactly that; a teenager. One that was poor and alone and had superpowers that he used to do little good deeds around his neighborhood. And Mr. Stark was Mr. Stark. The universe had to have been wrong this one time.

And what was worse was that Peter had just run away. He'd acted like an overdramatic romcom character when discovering that their soulmate was the quarterback they hated or something. It was possibly the worst part of all of this.

Peter kept in a sigh as he dropped onto his old mattress, pulling the lumpy covers over himself and squeezed his eyes shut in a half-assed attempt to bully out the pain of hunger in his stomach and the ache of undeserved longing in his heart. He so desperately wanted to be able to know his soulmate, but there was no way that Mr. Stark would be excited to actually know him. Besides, Mr. Stark pushed the Accords, and Peter was an unlicensed vigilante on the street. It was the man's job to find out who he was and turn him in.

Being soulmates didn't change that, even as his vision flashed to show a dark and fancy lab. Well, now he knew why his soulmate had always had such nice stuff.

 ---

"You what?"

"I found my soulmate," Tony snipped. "Keep up, honey bear. You're losing your touch, old man."

Rhodey ignored his comment, still staring at Tony from where he sat on a box in the Avengers common room that was probably filled with either dishes or Avengers gear. Tony passed the colonel a horribly green smoothie that he accepted without complaint, still staring at Tony but this time with a wide smile on his face.

"You really found him? Just walking around Manhattan?" Rhodey asked.

"Well, technically someone was trying to kidnap me, but sure."

"I'm sorry. What?"

"Relax. Everything turned out fine since my soulmate showed up."

Rhodey gave him a look, eyes glancing from the billionaire to the short shadow on the ground. "Your soulmate who is fifteen, saved you from a kidnapping?"

"Well, yeah. But he's got superpowers, so I don't think it was much of a sweat for him."

"Super--who the hell is your soulmate? Is this Twenty Questions? First guess: Ant Man."

"Hardy har," Tony joked. "No, not Lang. It's the spider kid."

Rhodey paused. "You have no idea who he is, do you?"

Tony shrugged, twirling the straw of his own green smoothie for a slight distraction from the fact that his soulmate had flinched and then ran away from him. It had kept him up with an anxiety-filled kind of drive as he'd tried to pick out which of the kid's was his little shadow. He'd only managed to weed out a few of the kids of the forty-something.

"No. He, uh, ran away. Friday's on the job looking for him right now, but he's a slippery one, 'cause, uh, no luck so far."

"I'm sorry, man," Rhodey apologized. "That sucks. Do you...do you know why he ran?"

"Something about a curfew."

"Then maybe he'll be out soon looking for you. Once school is out for the day, of course."

"Yeah. Maybe," Tony agreed, but he thought differently. The shake in the kid's voice, the flinch as he'd ducked away from Tony's hand, and the horrible defensive tenseness when he'd looked away from their switched shadows to look at him. He didn't think Spidey was exactly thrilled, or that he'd be looking for a way to tell the billionaire exactly who he was.

"Any flashes?" Rhodey asked. Tony hummed in confusion. "Since you realized you were soulmates?"

"Oh, uh, just a room last night. I don't know, it was pretty hard to make out." Tony had turned off all the lights in his lab once he'd arrived in it, hoping for some kind of flash of where his soulmate was. It had been reassuring to see the connection still intact, but it wasn't like the dark and bare bedroom had been much help. "I think he has siblings or something. There was another bed in there. Oh, add that to the search engine, Friday."

"Of course, sir. Now down to twenty-eight kids."

Tony smiled. Maybe he was actually getting somewhere.

  ---

"You what?"

"Shut up, Ned," Peter shushed, curling forward in another sit-up to hiss at his best friend who was staring at him in amazement. Ned didn't seem deterred in the slightest, but at least his voice dropped to match Peter's hushed whisper.

"I can't shut up. I'll never be able to shut up again! You met Tony Stark last night! This is the greatest day of my life."

"It really wasn't that big of a deal," Peter lied. He had conveniently left out the part where the billionaire was his soulmate, and considering Ned's reaction of his just meeting the guy, Peter was going to keep that to himself for the time being. Or forever. Whichever came first. Ned continued to stare at him in astonishment, and Peter relented as he curled up again. "Okay, it was pretty cool. He bought me a drink."

"What, like a beer?"

"No, Ned, a hot chocolate."

"Ohhh. That makes more sense."

"Yeah," Peter agreed. "And keep it down. Please? I don't need anyone thinking I drank last night. Mr. Fowler already put a new load of bullshit on my record and you know all the teachers get updates on the shit I do."

Ned's eyes darkened. "He gave you another strike?"

"Yeah," Peter panted, curling up faster as anxiety pumped underneath his skin. "My fault. Stupid. Shouldn't have been late."

"How late were you?"

"Like, ten minutes I think."

Ned spluttered, "But it was just ten minutes!"

"Mr. Fowler's a rule stickler," he half-truthed. Ned didn't need to know how shitty his group home leader was. "I'll just have to be more careful for a while and get back on his good side." Like Mr. Fowler had a good side. "It'll be fine in another week or two."

Ned clearly wanted to protest more, his friend was always so suspicious of Mr. Fowler and so insistent that Peter should just tell the man that he was Spider-Man and that he was helping people. Well, Ned thought they should tell everyone that he was Spider-Man, clearly thinking that it would help him get away with late assignments or missing curfew, but really it would only succeed in him getting arrested. Besides, now that Mr. Stark might be looking for him, he was determined more than ever to keep his identity safe.

Coach Wilson passed by, complementing, "Looking good, Parker."

Peter slowed down, faking a tired grimace and just wishing with every fiber of his being that PE would be over soon.

"So I guess that's a no on Liz's party, then?" Ned asked. Peter turned away from watching Coach Wilson walk away to stare at his friend.

"Liz is having a party?"

"Yeah? She talked about it last decathlon practice. Were you not paying attention?"

"I guess not. My bad," he mumbled. "Is it tonight?"

"Yeah, but you're probably in trouble aren't you?"

"Yeah," Peter agreed, thinking about the dinner he was going to miss tonight. Then again, if he went to the party, not only would Liz be there, but there'd probably be some snacks too. "But my curfew doesn't change."

"It doesn't?"

"I don't think it ever will. Like I said, Mr. Fowler is a stickler for rules, and the curfew is his favorite. It's completely unmovable in his mind."

"Weird."

"Yeah. He's pretty strange," Peter agreed. "So, what time tonight?"

"Seven, I think. And anyway, remember my idea about telling everyone that you're--"

"No, Ned. We're not telling people that I'm--" he lowered his voice dramatically, "--that I'm Spider-Man."

Ned pouted. "Fine. But could you, I don't know, appear as Spider-Man?"

"What? Why?"

"C'mon! Think about how cool it would be if you dropped down and were like, 'Hey, Ned! Whattup? Where's my buddy, Peter? 'Cause we're besties and I'm a cool superhero!' Wouldn't that be cool!?"

Peter stared.

"Ned, literally no one cares about Spider--"

"Now, see, for me, it would be F Thor, marry Iron Man, and kill Hulk," came the voice of the girl's sitting on the bleachers. Peter and Ned turned to listen.

"Well, what about the Spider-Man?" Charles asked.

"It’s just Spider-Man," Betty replied. Peter raised an eyebrow at Ned in a way that meant, See?

"Did you guys see the bank security cam on YouTube? He fought off four guys," Liz argued, her voice climbing just a little higher. Peter's eyes widened.

"Oh my God, she’s crushing on Spider-Man."

"No way."

Liz shrugged, tugging a strand of hair behind her ear. "Kind of?"

Peter turned back to Ned. "Yeah. Okay, sure, I'll bring the suit."

  ---

"Thank you, Mrs. Leeds!" Peter called, waving at the woman through her beat up green Toyota. She waved back at him and Ned with a cheery smile.

"See you two boys later! I'll be back at nine to make sure you're home on time, Peter."

"Thank you!" he said again as she drove off.

"Bye, Mom!" Ned said. There were a few looks sent their way, but Peter didn't really care. Even when Flash liked to humiliate him in front of the other kids at school, Peter never felt more than surface level embarrassment. He was past the point of caring about high school drama, but Ned ducked his head nervously, readjusting his new hat. His friend turned to him and whispered, "Dude, you have the suit right?"

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Peter gestured to his backpack. "Yeah."

"This is gonna change our lives," Ned squeed as they stepped up the driveway. Liz had a large house on a well-lit street in the suburbs. He could see even more colorful lights inside, just as bright as the music was, and anxiety rolled in his chest. He didn't care about what other people thought of him, he really didn't, but he couldn't stop the nerves at such an unfamiliar environment.

Peter stared down at his shadow on instinct, searching for comfort in the familiar fluffy hair. Catching himself, he forced himself to turn away and stare forward as he stepped through the door behind Ned.

He almost stumbled back as the noise hit him. There was the movement of chatter and the blaring of shitty and loud music. Peter stared as some girls walked past, swallowing nervously as his gaze went from them, to Flash DJ-ing, and then landing on Michelle, who glared at them as she spread jam on a piece of toast.

"Can’t believe you guys are at this lame party," she said. Peter frowned in confusion.

"But you’re here too," Ned said, confused hesitation taking up his voice.

"Am I?" And then she stalked away. Peter and Ned glanced at each other in confusion.

Ned recovered first, tapping his backpack. "Okay, anyway, we’re gonna have Spider-Man swing in, say you guys are tight, and then I get a fist bump or one of those half bro-hugs and--"

"Oh, my gosh!"

Ned was cut off as Peter turned away from him to look at Liz. Redness flushed onto his cheeks as she approached them with a wide smile and a red cup in her hand.

"Hey, guys. Cool hat, Ned."

"Hi, Liz," Ned said with a wave.

"Hi, Liz," he said, cursing himself as his voice broke immediately.

"I’m so happy you guys came. There’s pizza and drinks. Help yourself."

Peter's stomach rumbled at the thought, but he forced it down with a smile and a warbled, "What a great party."

"Thanks," Liz smiled. There was the shattering of glass, making her turn sheepishly. "Oh, I... My parents will kill me if anything’s broken. I gotta--"

"Yeah."

"Have fun," she said, hurrying away. Ned turned to him furiously, gesturing to where the senior had left.

"Dude, what are you doing? She’s here. Spider it up."

Like a flip had been switched, Peter remembered that Iron Man was probably looking for him. No way he could get away with showing himself at a high school party. This would be all over social media in barely an hour. "No, no, no. I can’t... I cannot do this. Spider-Man is not a party trick, okay? Look, I’m just gonna...be myself."

"Peter, no one wants that."

"Dude," Peter snapped, but even as he walked away, he knew it was true. He thought of the image of Mr. Stark's face when he'd realized they were soulmates.

Now more than a little out of it, the teenager finally made his way through the house, searching desperately for wherever the pizza was. He didn't make it very far down the hall when there was the screech of his name over a microphone.

"Penis Parker, what’s up?!" Flash yelled over the microphone. People turned to stare at Peter and Ned, sneers or sympathetic smiles decorating their faces. Peter tensed, glancing over to Ned. "Thought you were stuck at the group home! And didn't you know you were supposed to dress nicely for a party?"

Ned gave Peter a look, and that was how the superpowered teen ended up on the roof in his shitty superhero costume with his mask in hand as he chewed his lip in jittered fear.

"Hey, what’s up?" he said in a deepened voice, grabbing his mask from the bag and straightening it out. "I’m Spider-Man. Just thought I’d swing by and say hello to my buddy Peter. Oh, what’s up, Ned? Hey, where’s Peter, anyways? He must be around..." Peter sighed, dropping his hands and digging his fingers into the mask as his brows furrowed. "God, this is stupid. What am I doing?"

Peter stared from the roof down at where Ned was waiting, looking around anxiously, his friend's shadow bright underneath the lights. He glanced out of the corner of his eye down at where his own was scrunched beside him, wondering what Mr. Stark was doing right now. Maybe he was doing cool Iron Man stuff in the lab he'd had a flash of. Maybe...maybe he was wondering what Peter was doing too.

Just as he was about to sigh about how unlikely that was, there was the sound of a distant crash and a plume of bright blue. He began to push himself up, leaning forward to try and get a better look at the thing as his senses rang.

"What the hell?"

Peter stuffed on his mask and swung away, making his way through the neighborhood. After running across an embarrassingly long golf course, the sprinklers biting against his skin with the freezing water, he finally arrived at where he'd seen the blue smoke. Spider-Man dipped himself low, clinging to a small bridge and popping his head around the corner.

There were three men, a broken down old car, and a classic kidnapper white van. Peter watched as one guy whooped at the explosion that burst out from the weapon in his hand against the car. The two other men cringed back as he flinched at the bright light. The man returned to the van, putting the gun down and grabbing another one. It looked extremely similar to the one that had been used against Mr. Stark last night.

"Now, this is crafted from a reclaimed sub-Ultron arm straight from Sokovia. Here. You try."

The guy passed the weird arm-gun to the man with curly hair, who examined it in confused disdain. "Man, I wanted something low-key. Why are you trying to upsell me, man?"

"Okay, okay, okay. I got what you need, all right?" the guy placated, moving back to look through the van. "I got tons of great stuff here. One sec. Okay, I got, uh, black hole grenades, Chitauri railguns..."

"You letting off shots in public now? Hurry up," the tallest one warned. He stepped up to the curly haired guy. The buyer, Peter guessed. "Look, times are changing. We’re the only ones selling these high tech weapons."

"Oh, so this is where bad guys are getting their stuff," Peter whispered to his shadow out of habit. He shook his head, glaring forward and away from where Mr. Stark's silhouette extended.

"I need something to stick up somebody. I’m not trying to shoot them back in time," the buyer complained.

"I got anti-grav climbers," the guy at the van suggested. That seemed to finally get the third man's attention.

"Yo, climbers?"

And then, of course, Peter's phone rang. Immediately guns were drawn, clicking towards the buyer as Peter tore his phone out of his pocket, almost swearing as he caught sight of Ned's caller ID and shutting it off.

"Okay, what the hell was that?"

"Did you set us up?"

"Hey, hey, man."

His senses ringing, Peter dropped from the bridge, catching the men's attention. "Hey! Hey, come on. You gonna shoot at somebody, shoot at me."

"All right."

The gun clicked towards him. Peter shot a web, tearing the gun away, and then ran forward. His senses spiked and then pain jolted through Peter as something bright smashed against his face. It launched the teenager straight into the leg of the bridge, the concrete crumpling under his force. He groaned in pain, forcing himself onto his elbows.

"What the hell?" he muttered. The revving of an engine tore his head to where the van was beginning to drive off. He shot a web to the back of the van, attempting to stick to the ground but only succeeding in being dragged away and onto the harsh road, eliciting a surprised yelp from the high schooler.

Spider-Man shot another web in an attempt to right his balance, gritting his teeth as the road tore at his skin. The van dragged him around, swerving intentionally and smacking Peter through at least five trash cans before finally losing him into a pillar of solid brick. He groaned in pain even as he pushed himself to his feet and shot another web. It attached to the door, ripping it to the ground with a metal screech. Peter threw his hands up in exasperation.

"Great! Guess I'm gonna have to take a shortcut."

Peter leaped over a car into a yard and then a few more yards. At least there was a cute dog, but he wished he'd had more time to play with it.

The superhero stumbled along after scaring a couple of girls--his bad, but they'd get over it eventually. Hopefully--diving over a fence and skimming over a pool in a crowd of people that stared at him in gawked surprise. He called, "Great movie!" before swinging up with a tree and landing just a little too hard on a nearby roof. He panted heavily even as he kept going. He caught sight of the white van.

"Almost got you," he said to himself. "Thought you got away from me, didn’t you? I got you right where I want you. Surprise!"

Finally close enough, Peter leaped from the roof. His spine shivered, his hairs raised, and his heart leaped in fear as metal claws clamped down around him. Peter screamed hoarsely, twisting in midair as he was propelled away from the ground at a frightening speed. "AgH! What the hell!!??"

Peter barely took in the large wings, instead focusing on digging his hands around the metal claws clenched around his ankle. Whoever the bird guy was, he certainly didn't appreciate it. Haunting green eyes met Peter's wide white. His heart beat rapidly. How high up was he? The ground below looked so tiny. At least there was water under him.

And then he wasn't so thankful as the metal digging into his feet released all of the sudden. Peter screamed as he fell, twisting in midair as he searched desperately for an escape. The water underneath him grew closer and closer and there was nothing for Peter to grab onto. Nothing to web. Oh no, oh no, oh no oh no oh no--

Peter slapped against the surface. All the air was forced from his lungs as he was carried under by the lapping waves.

 ---

  "Sir--" Friday started. Tony didn't look up from where he was writing out code that he'd been pouring over for hours, going through every idea and web combination imaginable.

"Please don't turn down my music, honey," Tony said, swiveling in his rolly chair and wheeling over to the table where the webs he was in the process of replicating were beginning to formulate. He was on his fourth attempt now, and he was getting close. "I'm working."

"I am operating under the Itsy Bitsy Spider protocol."

Tony readjusted his glasses, turning away from where he was stirring the sticky formula to glance at the hologram of the suit. He'd been wondering when the kid would show up again. He hadn't been out all afternoon. "Yeah? What's up?"

In response, Friday popped up a video. It was clearly shot through a phone, shakily recording the kid skimming off of a pool before launching himself in the air. It dragged an amused smile from Tony, but it dropped as the next video played.

This one was clearly a security camera from the suburbs. The video was only a couple seconds long as a shuddering white van sped past the house, smoke flying from behind it. There was a bright purple shot and then Tony finally managed to catch sight of the bright red and blue suit being dragged along. Tony turned to his shadow, staring at where the hood was pulled up.

"What the hell have you gotten yourself into now, kid?" he asked it. "How old is this video?"

"Barely a minute."

Tony glanced at the unfinished suit and then back at the video playing on a loop. He guessed the suit would have to wait.

"Get me Mark Forty-Eight and take me to where this video was taken. Quickly, dear."

The suit activated across the room, stepping out of its case and allowing for Tony to be covered by it. The screen lit up immediately, his path highlighted to where the nearest window had opened. Tony shot out into the New York night, his heart beating rapidly. The kid had to be okay, right? He probably dealt with weird shit all the time.

The thought didn't stop the mechanic from being nervous. The kid was fifteen after all. He wasn't exactly equipped for this kind of thing.

It took barely a couple of minutes for Tony to arrive at the street where the video had been taken. There was a burn mark on the road, but no Spidey, and no sign of that van. He hovered, scanning for where the kid could be.

"Heat signatures, Fri. Give me something to work with."

His screen lit up, orange and red figures milling about in houses. There were a few people walking streets over, a car roving by slowly, a clash of body heat that made him think of a party, and a red dot hurtling out of the air ever closer to the river. Wait--

Tony fixated on where the red dot was slowly approaching the water, his heart pounding. "What is that? Friday, zoom in."

The video clipped towards the red dot, and Tony gasped as he recognized a body twisting through the air. And not just any body.

Spidey.

His thrusters whined before forcing the suit forward towards the dot that had disappeared from view. He turned in air, hovering over the body of water, before glancing down with a fearful swallow. A heat signature was illuminated.

"Kid," he gasped.

Tony dove down immediately and broke through the water's surface. It was dark underneath, but he could make out where the kid was. He wrapped his metal arms under the kid's armpits before shooting back into the blissfully cold air.

"I've got you, kid. I've got you."

Spidey didn't respond.

Ch 1 // Ch 3 // Ch 4 // Ch 5 // Ch 6 // Ch 7 // Ch 8

[itsnothingofinterest]

You know there’s been a lot of content from the hero stans lately about “the villains aren’t much better” or “that’s like what the villains are doing” whenever the villains/villain stans point out the heroes failings. But you know, when you say that enough, it becomes likely that the reverse is also true. So you know what, screw it; I’m gonna turn that around to show how much the heroes are like the villains & then show why that looks way worse for the heroes than it does the villains.

Especially since this guy’s the one who first made that point.

Part 1: Killing People

To start the compression, we can point out how the heroes are committing the same crimes as the villains; and murder’s a good place to start with that. I don’t think I need to point out Hawks’ murder of Twice and Endeavor’s various murder attempts on Shigaraki; both notable because heroes don’t kill, as confirmed by Ending. These 2 instances are in fact, the first instances of heroes attempting to kill non-Nomu villains besides All Might’s attempted murder of AFO, which he later admitted was wrong and vowed to do things right for the rematch.

Ah, but while these are them same crimes, I can already hear people furious at me for trying to compare 1 itsy-bitsy murder to the unfathomable number of deaths that would result from the PLF’s attack. So how about 110,000 deaths, is that a better compression?

I’m always “happy” to point out, laws are often based on precedent; and the precedent set by Kurogiri’s imprisonment in Tartarus indicates that would be the destination of PLF member that’re captured, as they are all working with the League & fighting heroes. Of course there’s not enough room for 110,000 people, so the rest will likely be killed while only the most dangerous are kept alive to suffer. But that’s fine, right? It’s not like the indiscriminate violence of villains; we’re talking state-sanctioned violence, which makes it okay.

Hey where have I heard that before?

Part 2: Crimes Against Humanity

This and the next part feel a bit unfair, as they’re both crimes committed more by the backers (the HPSC and Ujiko & AFO) than the guys on the front lines (the pros & the PLF). But it’s different because for the heroes, their leaders are among those backers, and the pros all have full knowledge of the offenses in question, even if the don’t exactly acknowledge them as such. Meanwhile the villains’ leader is Shigaraki, one of the front line guys, who inherited Ujiko already committing his atrocities. And we don’t really know how much the PLF know about what “goes into” a Nomu. Thus, they feel lees responsible for these next points; but we’ll be comparing them equally and holding both groups accountable regardless.

Anyway, crimes against humanity: on the PLF’s side, we’ve got the human experimentation used to make Nomus, and on the heroes side we’ve got inhumane super prison Tartarus.

Tartarus, if you’ll recall, is a prison made to allow for a sentence worse than the death sentence. This means it was made under the thought of “There are people who deserve worse than death. We will create this fate worse than death, and then subject people to it as we judge is fitting.” And so they did, quite readily too, as in 1 year, 6 villains Deku has encountered have already been sent there. Notably including Kurogiri, the League’s taxi driver and my main point of evidence that there may be a mandate that anyone in the League is to be sent to Tartarus. And if such a mandate exists, who knows how else Tartarus has been utilized? But even I’m wrong (and I very well could be), those numbers set quite a disturbing precedent for how the Japanese government utilizes their purposefully-made Fate Worse than Death.

Part 3: The Harming/Endangering of Children

“Oh but come on“ some will say “Even if Tartarus is that bad, the Nomus are still worse because they’re not just human experimentation, but also the occasional child experimentation.“ And you know what, maybe you’re right. I mean it’s not like the heroes (outside of the no. 1 of course) have ever done anything to hurt of endanger childr-

Oh. Oh that’s a bad look. That is egg on the heroes faces right there.

Heck, that might even add up to being worse than the Nomus, by the simple advantage of 1 < 2. I mean the Nomus are bad, I won’t deny that; but they might still come out on top when we compare them to a purposefully used and abused government-sanctioned Fate Worse than Death & the use of child soldiers for the purpose of fighting super dangerous criminal rebels-both at the same time.

Part 4: But It’s All For a Good Cause

But the heroes are all doing it to save people, right? Stopping dangerous criminals that committed horrible crimes? It’s all for the greater good, yeah?

Well, remember what we just talked about. Putting aside the PLF’s greater goals for a bit; if the heroes are justified in what their doing by preventing the PLF’s crimes, and yet they commit similar crimes, don’t they justify the PLF’s actions? Especially since one of the PLF’s goals is holding heroes accountable for their actions & failures. That is: if the heroes are justified by saving the lives of everyone who the PLF would kill; aren’t the PLF justified by saving the lives of their 110,000 members, who the heroes would kill if they won? And if the heroes are justified in what they do to stop the villains & their Nomu activities, aren’t the villains justified in what they do to stop the heroes and their use of child soldiers and government-approved Fate Worse than Death?

That sounds a bit too paradoxical to be right, but we’ll put a pin in that for just a second.

It’s time to stop putting aside the PLF’s greater goals and face facts; the heroes greater good is not the greatest good being fought for this arc. They aren’t really fighting for anything, actually; they fight for the status quo, and all of their justifications were listed in that last big paragraph. The PLF meanwhile, along with the above justifications, are also trying to accomplish something with all the crime they’re committing. They’re trying to end the corruption of power in the hero system, the various forms of quirk based prejudice going on, and the legally enforced bystander effect, as well as expanding the rights of the average citizen with regards to their quirks (which would also help with that bystander effect). And y’know, it’s been debated if all of this would be that good for society, but it is a cause the heroes don’t have.

In fact, Bonus Round: a lot of the things the PLF are fighting against that aren’t just the direct actions of heroes, heroes are still partially at fault for. For example; the concept of “villainous quirks” and the prejudice there in which affected Shinso & Toga’s childhoods would probably be much less of a thing if society didn’t revolve around good heroes that everyone loves and evil villains that try to ruin your lives. But most importantly for this discussion, this ‘crime’ is one the criminals don’t have corresponding activity to compare to, so that’s actually just a free win for them.

Final Notes:

And y’know, even if the villains aren’t better (I can understand why anyone would see any of their above “wins” as small in the grand scheme of things), the closing of the moral gap between the two sides really does look worse for the heroes than it does the villains. It’s not great for the heroes to be considered not much better, occasionally considered worse, and overall considered the rough moral equals to a group that called themselves THE LEAGUE OF VILLAINS. Like, intentionally.

The heroes have/are messed up so bad, that Machia is currently walking through apartment complexes while Dabi laughs & makes snarky comments on his back and I can still think “yeah, they’re about moral equals to Endeavor & Hawks”. That’s how bad their position is. It’s just embarrassing really.

Look, the truth is: those hero stans I talked about at the start were right about one thing; the villains aren’t the “good guys”. But the heroes aren’t the “good guys” either. Their aren’t any good guys, this is just a morally messed up situation and we’re all just along for the ride to see if there’s a way out. And maybe we have our faves who we’re rooting for to make it for as long as they can & maybe even be the ones to find that way out, the solution to this mess. But until then, I think we’ve all got to come to terms with the fact that almost all of our faves are problematic. It turns out that’s just the kind of manga this is.

[gatecoeur]

tagged as: v;the jensaarai bounty hunter

Arrie Gâtecœur of Ealor was more or less born into The Imperial Era - she doesn’t really remember a galaxy before the First Galactic Empire. She doesn’t remember a galaxy before Order 66 was executed. In fact, Arrie had come to believe the Jedi had been nothing but mythical warriors of an era long gone, despite the fact that her birth occurred just before the First Battle of Geonosis.

Things were relatively peaceful on the Gâtecœur family's corner of the temperate planet. Learning how to hunt, track, and live off the land at an early age, Arrie and her family made what they could trading with local farmers. That all changed when a group of pirate slavers suddenly attacked them, their neighbours and their homes. They had heard of these horrific raids, but never had they thought that the pirates would seek them out - they were simple folks. Why would pirates want anything from them?

Arrie got separated from her family, and was thus captured at the young age of 12. She was sold off to a research facility in the Parmic system, where the scientists there began experimenting on her and other young captives, trying to splice their genes with shi'ido DNA in hopes that the survivors of the experiments would go on to become the perfect assassins for the Empire, able to blend in to any environment they're thrown at. However, most didn't survive the initial splicing... Except for Arrie, that is. The experiments left her horribly scarred and in insane amounts of pain, but she soon had shapeshifting abilities that were much like the shi'idos - though her human body imposed limitations - along with their telepathic abilities. Unbeknownst to her at the time, the only reason she survived was because she was Force-sensitive.

Time was hard to keep track of on the facility, but one day, a group of captured members of the Black Bha'lir came to the facility. Some were much older than the previous captives, but allegedly the scientists wanted to test some theories and needed older subjects. This move on the Empire's part proved to be the downfall of the research project, as the Black Bha'lir successfully sent in a rescue team, killed the researchers and took Arrie along with them, fleeing to the criminal haven of Socorro and laying low for a while. The Black Bha'lir treated Arrie as one of their own, and after she explained her story to them, agreed to help her return home.

When Arrie did return to Ealor, she found a Jensaarai defender waiting for her in the ruins of her family home. Arrie was devastated to learn that her parents had died protecting her siblings, and that if the Jensaarai hadn't arrived when they did to fend off the remaining pirates, her brothers would have either shared their fate or hers. Arrie's Black Bha'lir escort however did not trust the Jensaarai defender, believing the group to have been executed long ago by the Jedi during the tail end of the Clone Wars. The Jensaarai went on to explain how Arrie managed to survive the gene splicing she experienced, despite it being impossible for them to have known such things. Arrie demanded to be brought to see her brothers as proof that the Jensaarai was being truthful, and the trio embarked on a trip to Susevfi. There, Arrie learned that she wasn't the only member of her family who was Force-sensitive, and said goodbye to her Black Bha'lir friend, who promised her that she always had a place amongst them.

From there, Arrie began her years training with the Jensaarai, whom were forced to stay hidden thanks to Jedi hunters and Inquisitors. She learned how to make Jensaarai armor "...using Sith techniques for working cortosis". Her Force training included "... being able to effectively mask (her) presence in the Force", as well as "... a unique power they called ballistakinesis". In 1 ABY, Arrie completed her training, and built her Nexu-inspired armor as a rite of passage in earning her rank as a Ring Defender. As a Ring Defender, she was also given her ship - an old and worn T-6 Shuttle she named Cloudfall. From then until the Battle of Endor, Arrie was amongst the Jensaarai that conducted periodic raids and ambushes on nearby Imperial garrisons.

Arrie and her brothers' lives would once again drastically change after the Battle of Endor though. A group of pirates known as The Invids sent out a message to the Jensaarai, stating that they were free from the Empire's oppression and persecution. Furious with the Jensaarai's decision to trust a bunch of pirates, after all they had been through, the 3 eldest Gâtecœurs left Susevfi in 4 ABY and went their separate ways, all of them hoping to find someone to help them make the Jensaarai see the error of their ways. Arrie decidedly enlisted herself to join the Mantis Syndicate - a house of the Bounty Hunter's Guild well-known for their specialty in hunting pirates.

The year is now 9 ABY. Arrie is trying to build up enough money and reputation as a bounty hunter to hire some people to go and rid Susevfi of its Invids pirate occupation. Despite the fact that the Jensaarai "...were told that the Jedi were dark siders, and that the Sith were champions of the light", and even had the roles of Darth Vader and Obi-Wan Kenobi mixed up, Arrie has long ago learned that those teachings were wrong, and has thus become even more disillusioned with the Jensaarai since her self-exile. Despite still wearing her Jensaarai armor and wielding her lightsaber weapons still, Arrie will vehemently call herself an ex-member, and will be even more offended at being called a Jedi, despite having learned the truth about them.

Key details about this verse:

Arrie is a polyglot. She's fluent in Galactic Basic Standard, Caamasi, Rodese, Socorran, Ealoran, Mando’a and Bocce. She can also speak in broken Huttese and Tusken. If asked what was the easiest to learn, Arrie would say Caamasi - she had been the apprentice of a Caamasi, and they had formed a strong enough bond to where Arrie was able to learn the language through memnis.

Arrie’s main fighting style is a Tràkata / Sokan / Form VI: Niman hybrid, with a pinch of Dun Möch. She prefers using lightsaber pike combat, but is also trained in Jar'Kai and saber throwing.

On top of the Force powers taught by the Jensaarai, Arrie is naturally gifted at animal bonding. Other Force abilites she has includes Force barrier, Force listening (used to hear at great distances only), Force throwing, precognition, psychometry (one of her weaker abilities though - doesn’t often happen through her own will, and if it does, it takes A LOT out of her), Tapas, Force fear, and Force crush 

Arrie owns a double-bladed lightsaber pike, with one lightsaber end NOTABLY shorter than the other - think of the other end as more of a spiked pommel. The handle is made of phrik and measures 5 feet long. When both blades are activated, Arrie’s weapon is taller than her by a few inches. Despite that, she’ll often use it without the sabers being activated to hide the fact that she's an ex-Jensaarai. Arrie’s saber emits a yellow glow.

Along with her pikesaber, Arrie also owns a WESTAR-35 blaster pistol, a modified cycler slugthrower rifle, and various knifes with different purposes. Her weapons stay on her person practically at all times.

Arrie’s armor is modelled after a Nexu. It’s a cream white colour with dark stripes. Some features include 4 red “eyes” in the helm with built-in macrobinoculars and infrared vision, retractable claws, a whipcord launcher, and a crest of blue quills that adorn the top of the helm. There’s also a line of blue quills that go along her spine, but they’re retractable for practicality’s sake. More often that not though, Arrie wears a cloak over her armor to hide the majority of its details.

Arrie's T-6 Shuttle, Cloudfall, was retrofitted with two laser canons and a shield generator when she first received it. She also redid the interior entirely. Given that T-6's have a “… spacious interior provided for reasonably comfortable space travel”, Arrie would’ve fixed that part of the ship up so that it had 2 main sections - one for storage (holding cargo, supplies, weapons, with possibly some makeshift space for passengers), located closest to the loading ramp and taking up the majority of the ship’s spacious interior, and personal living quarters, located near the cockpit. As for the exterior, definitely not done in the red and white you see in pretty much all pictures of the T-6 - she more likely to have had the paint job done in a light grey, blue and yellow.

Due to Arrie’s heavy scarring, she got herself accumulated a series of tattoos through her Black Bha'lir connections to help cover them up. For sake of brevity, the tattoos look like her markings in her canon true form, except that the smoke goes along both of her arms and her spine, and does not move. Scars wise, she has a lot of medical scars from her time being gene spliced, such as a long scar along her spine, a scar line along her legs and arms, a line straight down the centre of her torso, and a line across her chest. She also has a scar just underneath her left eye from a lightsaber training accident. Arrie’s canon burn scar on her right side is present, but is from another training accident where a student figured out how to use Force lightening. All of her shapeshifting accident scars, including her wing scars, are also present, but any other canon scars are not. 

[gilmesc1]

Furiousgoldfish post 4: The fishening

I was feeling creative. Sue me.

Ok. So yeah I've written 3 furiousgoldfish posts already, so if you want a more in depth review of past stuff check those out, but if you're lazy, I'll do a quick recap here:

So angry fish's blog is an abuse recovery thing where they talk about their experience with abusive narcissistic parents while posting helpful(?) tips for coping and general umbrella terms with vagueness that would make a politician scream. They also may be a system(?)

Angry fish uses umbrella terms and generalization which renders much of what they say as useless runny bullshit you shouldn't touch, examples being the famed meme worthy "narcissists should be sterilized" statements. So the crime (I'm also dramatic. Sue me.) so far is harming others (but hey all cluster b's are aiming to destroy everything so it's fiiiiine) and posts that represent certain individuals as harmful shitty people, which is not the case with many on tumblr.

Is fish on the level of their abusers? hmmm...

Anyways minus the DID thing, I've covered a lot of it, plus just searching furious goldfish brings up the same stuff with the necessary evidence. But today friends, I'm gonna talk about the rumors a lot of you threw in my ask box. And trust me. Not pretty are they.

Narcissists do have a track record for being horrible, so yes some stigma is obviously going to arise. Can fish truly be blamed while they themself are traumatized? That may be an out there but not for this. You see, our lovely all knowing fish may in fact be a terf.

If you don't know what a terf is, get thee to google and join in the collected groan of disgust. The views of terfs cannot be blamed on trauma, they are clear discriminatory, harmful, hateful and honestly sickening.

Where is our proof? Well let's lay it out. If you check out fish's profile you'll see that you can't see who they follow. Allegedly this is because there were several confirmed terfs that they were following. Additionally you can check notes and tags on some of their posts and see some fairly gross things.

If you go to my mess of a profile you'll see a post retaining to this that I reblogged that contains a lot of the screenshots of this. So if you haven't seen that, check out the evidence.

Now is it all true? are they a confirmed terf? While there are some suspicious tags floating around, I don't think it has ever fully been confirmed, however I think at the very least their association with terfs is. Is this enough to condemn them?

In my personal opinion yes. Terfs on tumblr are highly vocal and focused on their fuckery and i don't think one can asscociate with them without agreeing with some of their views.

Additionally, with the amount of fishcourse that goes on, I highly doubt that furiousgoldfish has no idea about the allegations. What's interesting to me is that they've never made a statement on it. If you were accused of being this disgudting type of person, wouldnt you want to deny it?

I couldn't find any direct answers from fish when questioned as they seem to love ye olde block button, meaning that its fairly open ended.

I personally find it a little ironic. Can one be a good source of abuse recovery while potentially being a member of a group that abuses others?

Tell me your thoughts guys, feel free to show any evidence or yell at me if I've gotten something wrong. Again the evidence is in a reblog on my blog, but I can post them again if needed.

Finally as much as I love a good internet fight, this still isn't confirmed. Additionally I don't want anyone getting hurt by rushing in and attackimg the fish. I've tried to be respectful but quite honestly the respect is slipping.

Just stay safe, share thoughts, and don't be a judgemental moron like our favorite tumbler terfs. I hope all the anons are satisfied.

That's all I got.

[towhomitmayconcern-you]

Dear Former Youth Pastor

*Disclaimer: This post is only about my youth pastor and not the church as a whole.. That letter is coming later

To who it may concern, to the staff and Pastor M,

I am furious. So much intact that I wish that there could be some way I could truly show the negative impact you have had on my life. But I can’t honestly express that without babbling so I will sum it up in about 5 points in no particular order.

1.Guilt

I understand that we have a set doctrine on what we believe as Christians, but I am a HUMAN. YOU are a HUMAN, and we are not perfect. I fall, you fall, WE ALL FALL! That’s why God’s grace is so amazing. So, when I fall I do not need you giving me a lecture about how sinful I am because honestly I probably already fell like crap and you making me feel worse will not help.

2. Shame

Okay, this kind of goes with the first, but this probably the one that infuriates me the most. You shame people. Whether that’s because they have done something wrong, see point above, or because you simply don’t like it. Oh, I didn’t come to church Sunday because I was at prom... NOT drinking, NOT having sex, or doing drugs. I also had permission from my parents, but GOD FORBID I miss one Sunday. Damn, I must be going to hell.

Also, I don’t like the way you joke around with people. I hate how you bully people but tell them to calm down because you were “joking.” Commenting on someone’s clothing, that isn’t as nice as yours isn’t funny. Especially around youth that may not have enough to buy name brands like you are blessed to do. I am sorry that this top may show a little too much of my chest for you, but I have breasts, that girl over there she has them too, oh look so do you! Most females have them! So, instead of shaming me, infant of everyone talk to me privately.

No one should feel insecure in church because the staff is bullyin- I mean joking around with them.

3. You are NOT my parents

You do not get to dictate or say what I can or can not do. You are not my mother nor my father. You do not feed, I clothe me or put a roof over my head. So who the hell do you think you are telling me I can’t: go to prom, date,  not go to church, listen to certain music, dress a certain way or do ANYTHING for that matter. Yes, again we have a doctrine, but truthfully you have never truly cared to get to know me so therefore, your opinion on my life doesn’t even get a glance.

4. Not listening or valuing me

Now I do not need to be on a pedestal or recognized for everything I have ever done, but if I am the only one coming to clean the youth building, even the nasty bathrooms, a thank you would be nice... If I am the only one coming early to help set up and leave late to help take down, repeating me would be nice.

Most importantly if I open up to you about my struggles and my past. You better at least say something along the lines of “You’re here now, and you are an amazing person despite all the abuse you endured.” Not okay and dismiss everything I have told you. Then when I do something you don’t like and use it as ammunition for your guilt trip.

5. I am not a puppet

I know you don’t like me Pastor M. I know because Wouldn’t follow your every whim. I didn’t listen when you told me not to date so and so. I went to all of my high school dances even thought you expressed how you think that they are horrible ideas, and it would be better for my mental, personal and spiritual health if I didn’t go. The list can go on, and on, and on, and on. One thing that you have yet to learn is that I have a brain, people have them. We are taught to think for ourselves, well most of us, because of this I am going to question your authority. I am going to ask a question about my faith, about why we practice a certain way and about why you believe certain things. BECAUSE blind faith can cause more harm, and I do want to know what is going into my mind.

These are the reasons I stopped going to youth group and partly about why I stopped coming to N.H. You have not done all of these things to me, but to other people who are still hurting because of it. I would be lying saying that ask my would have healed and that I am still not angry. I am still VERY angry, but I no longer care about you. I do care about my friends and the others you have hurt.

I am more angry about the damage you have put them through because they have left the church. They have abandoned God and think He is vengeful, hating and manipulating because that’s what you showed them. Luckily I had a great support system that showed me that God is none of these things and that even thought that you are a Christian, that you are not my God. You are not going to see me, and I don’t need you to have a relationship with Him. I don’t want to sound vengeful, but I hope you truly think about what you do and how you affect those you are preaching to.

Sincerely,

The girl you never liked - Nae