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xenia-cenia · 2 years

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Burnout - Idia x Fem!Reader

A/N - I wanna get back into writing again so here’s a pretty easy one :) Haven’t played book 6 so I’m just rolling the die about in character or not lol also shoutout to @merakiui for helping me realize how to improve

Word count - 2,757

TW - Burnout, real bad panic attacks, swearing, bullying, slight spoilers, possibly OOC?

The sun peered through the windows of Ramshackle, illuminating your dismal bedroom and burning your eyes. You slowly blinked at the window, silently cursing it out for waking you up. With a frustrated groan, you slipped out of bed and walked to your bathroom, shutting the door behind you and flicking on the lights. Your eyes rose to the mirror, and you instantly regretted it.

You had heavy eyebags, your face looked sunken in, and you lacked the previous happiness you were accustomed to back home. You ran a hand down your face, pausing as it covered your mouth, and sighed - wincing at how warm your breath felt on your skin.

You had to admit it - you looked awful. It wasn’t like the dorm itself was any better, either. Grim had been leaving tuna cans scattered throughout the kitchen, and now the scent of moldy tuna had ingrained itself in the walls. The dust and grime you had spent so long cleaning on your first night came back with a vengeance, causing anyone who stepped foot in Ramshackle to not so discreetly cough into their arms for several minutes.

But you couldn’t find the effort to care. All you seemed to do nowadays was sit in your bed and stare out the window - some of your friends would stop by to check in on you, or leave food, but they’d find your bedroom door locked and Grim sleeping on the couch.

Water splashed against your face, the cold startling you from your thoughts, despite it being you who’d thrown it.

“Damn.” You groaned, “Heat went out again.” You wiped some of the excess water off with an unwashed towel sat next to the sink, and walked back to your bed.

As you lay down, you stared at the ceiling and tried to force yourself to sleep. All you wanted was to go home. Not deal with the bullshit of a world you don’t belong in.

Overblots, magic, and other worlds? That should be a fantasy novel. Not your life. If Crowley cared, maybe you’d be back home, petting the stray cat that liked to meow outside your apartment at 2am. Or going on the date with the cute barista you met at your favorite cafe. He’d always draw on the napkins that came with your orders, and you loved watching how good he was getting. His favorite was cats, doodling the stray you’d describe to him with a goofy smile on his face.

You could see him perfectly in your mind - tall, soft brown eyes, hair always tucked into a dark green beanie, and calloused hands that lingered over yours - but you could hardly remember his name. Did it start with a J? Or was it A?

Tears began filling your eyes, and you turned over in bed to clutch a pillow against your chest. Your nails dug into the fabric, picking at the start of a tear, your eyes boring a hole into the wooden floorboards.

Right as you began to drift your eyes shut, a pitiful attempt to stop the tears from flowing, someone knocked at the door. You groaned, not sparing the intruder the energy to sit up in bed, “Go away.”

You heard soft, frantic, mumbling on the door's other side, the sound reminding you of a mouse skirting through its enclosure. The person on the other side knocked again, this time somewhat quieter.

“Piss off.” You spat, feeling the anger rising in your chest from your incessant visitor, “I don’t wanna talk.”

“I-I’m not here to talk.” The meek voice piped up. You blinked and slowly sat up, staring at the door and trying to remember where you’d heard that voice before.

“Ace?” You asked incredulously, “I don’t want whatever is it you got Trey to cook, stop offering.”

“It... it’s Idia.”

“Idia?” You got out of bed and walked to the door, holding your hand over the lock, “What are you doing here?”

“They’re... your friends won’t stop bothering me. They’re a bunch of normies, and they keep telling me to come.”

“Why?”

“Don’t ask me to understand normie thought processes. Interrupted me right before my guild was gonna raid a dungeon, too...”

You rolled your eyes, glad for the layer of separation the door gave you, “Sorry that they bothered you. You can just finish your raid or whatever.”

“Really? You just gave me an extra life!”

“Sure. Whatever.”

You were about to head back to bed, but he rapped his fingers against the door, “Oh, wait, I forgot. Ortho had said you might want these.”

“Want what?”

“Headphones, like the kind I wear. Made them myself, so you know they’re good.”

“Headphones?” You cracked open the door and peered out through the sliver.

“More like SSR headphones, if you ask me. Noise-canceling, no static, comfortable.” Idia held a pair of black headphones, proudly enthusing over the dark blue padding around the ears and the sleek buttons hidden in the design.

“...no static means I can play music, right?”

“Precipice Moirai is pre-loaded already, but if you can download it you can play it.”

You opened the door and grabbed the headphones, running your hand against the surprisingly soft outer rim. “Thank you, Idia.”

“NBD.”

“You know, Idia, you’re really nice.”

“Eek!” He curled into himself. “A rare mob spawned! Don’t have enough mana for this!”

You smiled, “I’ll talk to you later, alright?” He nodded in response and scurried off down the hall before you can even shut the door. “Idia...” You whispered to yourself as you slumped against your door.

The headphones felt strangely light considering how much tech must be inside, you turned them on and placed your head against the door as unfamiliar pop music filled your ears.

The next day, Grim was surprised to see you sitting outside Ramshackle. You were wearing headphones and drawing something on a piece of paper, unbothered by the grass and rocks biting into your skin. Grim had tried to get your attention but gave up after 5 minutes of yelling.

He figured there were better things to do than yell at someone who wasn’t even listening, so he set off for more interesting things.

For hours, you sat outside Ramshackle, furiously drawing something and occasionally staring at the sky. Eventually, the moon rose, twinkling and urging you to go on a walk.

You sat your drawing down and walked through Ramshackle’s gate, the cool metal stinging your hand. Wind blew through the trees in a soft melody, almost alluring enough to take off your headphones, but you opted to see instead of hear.

Soft fireflies began to take flight, illuminating your path through the campus. You walked until you found yourself in front of the door to the hall of mirrors, its awe-inspiring splendor leaving you stuck in place. You shakily rose a hand, hesitating, before throwing the door open. You stepped inside, the smell of roses, sea spray, and perfume overwhelming your senses.

You rose your arm to cover your nose, coughing at the sudden stimulation and forced your way inside. The mirrors had labeled pendants engraved in marble, but you barely spared them a glance before pressing your hand against the nearest surface in an attempt to balance yourself. However, you felt your heart skip a beat as your hand gave way and you fell through a mirror.

Blue fog seeped through the air, thick enough that you could barely see in front of you. You forced your way up a winding staircase, trying to ignore the overwhelming feeling of being watched as you went.

You walked through a well-kept lounge and took a moment to marvel at the technology displayed in the center, and continued until you saw a familiar face.

“Idia!” You called down the hall, jogging up to the surprised boy as you pulled your headphones to your neck, “Am I in Ignihyde? I was trying to look at the hall of mirrors, and now I’m here...”

He dropped the snacks he was holding, staring at you with a mixture of horror and shock on his face, “AH, surprise encounter!”

“No, I...” You took the headphones off your neck, “I didn’t mean to startle you. Just a bit lost. And, since I’m here, wanted to thank you for letting me borrow these.”

Idia looked between the headphones you were offering back to him and your face, “Th-there yours.”

“Huh? No, I-” you blinked. “You sure?”

“Yeah, and I got a raid so... um... bye?” He grabbed the snacks off the floor and scurried back down the hall.

“But I’m still lost.” You sighed and resolved yourself to a long night back home.

It took two weeks before you finally started going to classes again, much to Ace and Deuce’s delight. You were pleasantly surprised at how lenient the professors were with you. You were more surprised at just how carefully every person you saw treated you as if you were a glass sculpture placed on the edge of a ledge.

Ace, Deuce, and Grim hadn’t made a single joke at your expense, Trey kept inviting you to ‘taste test’ the things he cooked (which you knew was just a lame excuse for him to give you free food), and even Azul gave you no-strings-attached discounts at the Mostro Lounge.

Part of you was happy for the kindness, but you knew better than to think it’d last.

In fact, it took two weeks and three days for it to just crumble in on itself. You’d been sitting idly by yourself between classes, adding on small details to your drawing, when two pairs of sneakers entered your view.

“Thought maybe you’d gone.” The first person spoke.

“Like we’d get that lucky.” The second person snorted in laughter.

“You’re right - people like her, just can’t seem to go away, can they?”

“I don’t want any trouble.” You mumbled, your eyes staring blankly at your drawing.

“Then why do you keep bringing it? Ever since you came here, you have just brought problem after problem.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to.”

“You act so high and mighty like you’re some kind of god. All you do is bitch, and everybody bends over backward to make you quiet.”

You gripped the edges of your drawing, “I’m really sorry- I... I just...”

“You just get in the way. You can’t even use magic - why are you here?”

One of them ripped the paper from your hands, and the other held you against the tree you were sitting against when you tried to stand.

“What is this?” The one holding the drawing turned it sideways, “Looks like shit.”

“It’s-”

The second one hit you in the stomach, “Your voice is so annoying.”

The first one showed your drawing to the second, snickered, and tore it in half.

“NO!” You cried out, reaching for the remains of your hard work.

“Shut up!” The second one slapped you, letting you fall to the ground before they kicked you in the side. After several minutes of beating, they laughed and took off for something new.

You lay on the ground, your nose was almost certainly broken and in terrible pain, but forcing yourself to sit up and grab the scraps. With teary eyes, you tried to put the pieces together. Sniveling and trying to keep the tears at bay, you unsuccessfully sat and felt yourself begin to hyperventilate.

Nausea began to build in your stomach, the world blurring and fading away as you stared at the effort gone to waste. Shakily, you stood and began to walk back to Ramshackle. The second you saw the familiar gate, you broke into a sprint and dove into your bed, holding the blanket around your head.

You scratched at your face, banged your hands against your head, and kicked the sheets on your bed until they were bunched up at the foot of your bed. When your eyes opened again, you caught sight of your headphones sitting on your nightstand, you growled in anger and threw them at the ground, the black plastic shell falling off and splintering.

Without another thought, you tore through your room, not leaving anything untouched. By the time you were finished and breathless, a knock at your door, your room was a mess of thrown-about clothes, torn papers, and broken technology.

You collapsed against the side of your bed, holding your head in your hands as you sobbed. A creak from your hallway caused your head to shoot up, and you saw Idia staring at you, one hand on your door, and the other cautiously held in the air.

“I... uh... the headphones tell me when they’re broken.” He looked at the plastic on the ground, and he nervously stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. Idia stood just in front of you like he was on the verge of crying himself and eventually sat next to you, taking off his own headphones and playing with the settings, before putting them on your head. You recoiled at the sudden contact but took a deep breath and the soft music playing.

Idia exhaled and watched as you visibly relax, eventually letting yourself lean on his shoulder. He awkwardly tapped his fingers against his knees, unsure of himself, and waited for you to be ready.

After 20 minutes, you slid the headphones off and exhaled shakily. “They ripped my drawing.” You spoke hoarsely.

“I’m sorry.”

“It... back home, I had this cat. Or, I didn’t have him, he just showed up. Called him Sparkler. He was a stray, lit up my house with his dumb little walk. He wasn’t that smart, but I loved him. I think he liked me. Or, if anything, he liked the tuna I’d buy him. Nobody else in my apartment complex tolerated him, said he was dirty. But I made sure he was bathed. He liked baths, y’know. Not many cats do, but he did. His dumb little eyes would light up when I turned on the sink, and he’d start meowing like crazy. I was saving up to buy him a litterbox. To really mark the occasion in my head. Like, you are my cat. And then I came here. I don’t- it’s been so long-” you sighed and fought another wave of sobs, “I was drawing him, making sure it was perfect. Didn’t wanna forget. And these guys - I don’t even know who they are- but they hate me. They keep saying things about how a girl shouldn’t be at NRC. Not like I wanna be here either. They ripped it. I’ve been working so hard, and they ripped it to shreds.”

Idia patiently held you as you started to cry again, his expression blank as he listened.

“I... I’m sorry. I shouldn’t put this on you. I broke your gift, too. And you’ve been so nice to me, I-I...”

He didn’t say anything, just carefully stood and dragged you out of your room. The two of you walked in silence until you were sitting on his bed, nervously looking around. He sat at his computer and started typing faster than you could even see. Eventually, Ortho came in and kept you company.

After two hours of idly talking to Ortho, who was just a sweetheart, Idia sighed loudly and collapsed back in his chair.

“What is it, Big Bro?” Ortho looked at Idia.

“Just an EZ-level hack. NRC security is a common mob without me.”

“NRC security? What are you doing?” You stared at him owlishly.

“Finding the noobs that aggrod you, obviously.”

“What?” You jumped off his bed and to his side, looking at the blurry ID pictures of the two people who’d torn your drawing. “That’s them!”

“Whee hee hee, told you it was easy.” He grinned toothily, “RIP to their electricity!” He pressed a final button on his keyboard.

“But... Idia... why?” You turned towards him.

He kept his eyes on his screen, playing with the end of his hair, “Simple protect the NPC quest, that’s all.”

You smiled and sat down, “Thank you, Idia.”

“NBD.”

“Maybe, but I appreciate it anyway.”

Idia hesitated, looking between the keyboard and you, “There’s a cat that hangs around the grounds at night. I got space in my party for one more, if you’d want to come with someday.”

“I’d love that, Idia.”

He turned away from you again, but if you’d look closer you’d of seen a huge blush and wider grin on his face.

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