#he is so friend shaped and cute I am actually losing my mind

[marlequinncos]

He has arrived.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

What’s your pov on her pregnancies? Of the body or surrogate?

I'm opening Pandora's Box tonight in honor of the eclipse.

I'm 80/20.

20% of the body because:

There are tiny skinny-Minnie people in my family who didn't gain any weight during their pregnancies except in their faces and in the baby bumps (as photographs of Meghan depict), so I know it's possible.

That one appearance of Meghan where she accompanied Harry but hid backstage until he cajoled her out. She was not looking her best that day (very puffy, bloated face) and seemed a bit angry, to me, at being called out/forced onto the stage to stay hello.

Padding the bump - which some celebs do, especially when their bump isn't the typical "cute" baby belly - can explain the difference in sizing day-to-day.

How early it was announced.

How long it took Meghan to lose the baby weight - she was still carrying a lot of extra weight at Trooping 2019 (and the weight gain was amplified for me by poor styling choices with her hair, hat, and outfit).

80% surrogacy because:

There was no PR about Meghan's pregnancy compared to Kate's, and Meghan has always done the "anything Kate can do I can do better" PR competition every chance she could. If Meghan had terrible morning sickness, it'd have been all over the tabloids about how much worse than Kate Meghan's morning sickness is. If Meghan didn't have any sickness, it'd have been all over the tabloids about how much better and hard-working Meghan is during her pregnancy.

The excessive belly-groping and coat-flicking. Yes, she was doing that on purpose to get all the cameras and attention, but IMO she was doing it so excessively that it crossed into "the lady doth protest too much" territory for me.

The bending over and squatting down with knees and feet together. I've never been pregnant but I am a bigger girl who carries her weight in her midsection and who also cannot bend or squat down with knees, ankles, and feet together.

The alleged deal she had with Trevor that if she had a baby, he would pay for a personal trainer and a nutritionist and a nanny so she could whip her body back into shape. That's not someone who wants to be pregnant (but of course, people *can* change their minds. But still.)

The "rules of engagement" that Meghan and Harry sent to their Windsor neighbors/community about how the neighbors couldn't speak to the Sussexes or take their photographs.

The inconsistencies between what Harry reported in Spare and what the Portland Hospital's actual procedures are and the people who were involved.

Meghan choosing to deliver at Portland instead of Lindo and refusing to serve the baby on a silver platter after birth. The Lindo photocall is one of Diana's five* iconic photos. Are you telling me that Meghan happily copies Diana's outfits, copies Diana's pregnancy woes (emotional/mental distress to the point of self-harm), copies Diana's complaints about the BRF and the grey suits, copies Diana's second pregnancy announcement, and copies Diana's Panorama makeup...but she draws the line at copying Diana's Lindo photoshoots? And has a controlled photoshoot with one television camera and one photographer instead?

Meghan's birth "stories" matching more of the American Hollywood stereotypes than actual British practice.

Just one papwalk during all of her second pregnancy.

Hiding her belly with a giant-ass purse during the NYC baby shower after having spent the evening partying with friends, including Markus Anderson.

Harry's first appearance after Archie's birth being in the horse stables at Windsor instead of around the hospital (as William and Charles had been) and also Harry's "babies change so much in two weeks" comment.

Tacky social media influencer games with Archie's first photos under the guise of "privacy" - showing us the back of his head first, or his hand or his foot. Just show us the damn baby. No one cares about him that much.

Editing Archie's birth certificate.

Sara Latham bungling the media strategy for Archie's birth announcement. (Let's be real here. It's not Kensington Palace that fucked it up. It was the Sussexes' own people giving KP the wrong information in the first place.)

In the same vein of Meghan's "anything Kate can do I can do better" PR competition, there have been no stories about how Meghan felt of the early baby days. Kate and her family/friends have gone on record about how difficult the first few weeks with George were. Where is Meghan's equivalent? If Archie was a terrible newborn, then where are the stories about how much worse than Kate Meghan had it? Or if Archie was a happy, easy newborn, then where are the stories about how easy Meghan found motherhood? Instead the only story we got was "oops, it's feed time. Gotta go. Peace."

How early the pregnancy was announced.

How quickly (and suspiciously) the clinic/practice that Meghan used for her second pregnancy closed soon after Lili was born.

On that note, I don't subscribe to the theory that a lot of you may have (and which has ended up in my inbox quite a few times) that Archie doesn't know who Meghan is because he didn't smell her milk in South Africa and had a reaction. First off, PLEASE stop sending me that. I REALLY don't want to read about Meghan's breasts anymore.

Second, I don't think the Sussexes having nannies to help care for Archie is the kiss of death that many of you think it is. Some people just aren't baby people or little kid people. Some people like the older years better, when the kid can talk and is a little more independent and mobile. I've always suspected that that's Meghan and Harry, because all of their PR about wanting kids or liking kids has alwas featured older school-aged kids. They're not baby/toddler/early years people. And that's OK. That's not something to condemn them for.

And I don't think it's fully fair to call them out on their hypocrisy of what they said they wouldn't do as parents before they had children. Some of the hypocrisy is deserved (like the comment about not dressing their kids as Victorian ghost children but then turning around and giving Lili a Victorian ghost child dress for her 1st birthday photo), but they do deserve more grace than they're sometimes given; people just don't know how hard parenting or having children is until the baby is here. Yes, ding them for saying they'd never have a nanny but then turning around and hiring two or three, but also let's acknowledge that they know they can't (or don't, or won't, however you want to say it) care for their own kids themselves and hired responsible caretakers.

Finally third, I don't think Meghan ever breastfed those kids. Maybe she tried in the beginning with Archie, but if she did, she gave up pretty quickly. Those kids are formula babies. That's OK! So I don't buy the theory she was taking hormones and her weight gain was hormone-induced. Again, it's because of the missing "anything Kate can do I can do better" competition here.

*Diana's top 5 iconic photos are (in no particular order) the wedding dress portrait, the Lindo photos, the Taj Mahal photo, the Panorama photo, and the Revenge Dress photo.

[katyspersonal]

Ayyyy 3 years of Bloodborneing! I am old now xD 🎉

I checked my @katyahina main, that existed many months before this blog, and.. damn, I really HAVE been into Bloodborne for 3 years! Not just that, but I've kept missing the proper day because I misremembering joining in Spring and not Winter. But.. yeah!

^ This meme was how my Bloodborne fan era technically started. It was the first thing I've posted on it, after about a month of passionate discussions with my friends who played it.. and then fishbowlcarnage, a super based Soulsborne blog that unfortunately deactivated year later, liked it and followed me instantly. I've just started to take first steps towards being "properly" online in social media after a seriously horrible and long period in my life, and having that sense of 'a cool person' giving me attention again, after all that time? Yeah, I felt like I could not pull the 'it was just a joke, I do not intend to post more Bloodborne!!' after something so significant. Look, I was very sad, and in shards from after leaving abusive relationship that were a huge part of my "isolation" from sane people. Still, I think it is funny that I might not even have stayed around in this fandom, had it not been a single person giving me a hand at the most important time. She never knew how meaningful it was for me, and never will now (genuinely hope she is fine, wherever she is..)

But afterwards I started drawing and loredigging more! This aesthetic and this type of storytelling was absolutely nothing like what I was used to, so it was very hard to whip my art into a more "serious" shape after years of round, cute and cartooney stuff. And even harder to connect so many vague hints and scattered lore scraps! I thought I was losing my mind upon discovering my first theories. Heck, I swear I learned what growing eyes on the inside felt like XD @val-of-the-north was there for me on every step on the way, he remembers me screaming at how bad it hurt my brain and how I was losing sanity dsfhjdfs In the end, my brain did get completely rewired in terms of media analysis and how I create things. I think I will never be the same. Admittedly, I am so, so, SO thankful to my former self for discovering all theories on my own, instead of instantly socialising and taking hot takes, theories and designs in the fandom as a reference. Talking with other fans significantly improved my interpretations and theories, but the best way to go is to first have your own version, so it can be refined upon interactions. Rather than just letting what's already there decide for you, you feel?

Granted, it's been painful 3 years for at least 5 significant reasons, and time flew really fast. Sometimes I regret having joined the fandom instead of being the 'unreachable' fan (the one that just posts theories and fanart without ever actually interacting with other fans). Watching the best, the most level-headed and interesting fandom in my life rot into a clown mess of 'cool kids' cliques, hierarchies and division, discourse, passive aggression, toxicity, gospel headcanons, snobbish treatment of any fan that didn't grab a beer with an "influencer" at the Discord and resentment towards fans who are actually passionate was PAIN. I hoped this kind of rot that kills every other small fandom could never touch US, but alas.

On the other hand, accepting that all good things should rot one day is important part of any engagement. Resisting what's natural end only makes things worse. ...that sounded like a very Soulsborne-moment. Besides, all pain (personal one or 'on behalf of my community' one) was worth the knowledge and insights on nature of people I've gotten! I understand so much more, it is only fair that the price was so heavy. ....and that also sounded like a very Soulsborne-moment. And at the same time, while I was raving like a grumpy old man about "better simpler times", even older fans came towards me to admit that actually this is not a novelty but just a more annoying form of it, and the community knew at least two previous 'cycles' of rising and then rotting like this. So in the end it doesn't matter, and some day things will improve again, only to get ruined again. ..... *sighs* and is not it a fucking Soulsborne-moment yet AGAIN.

I am still glad that I was able to find the interest in these awesome stories, and that I've found such good friends. I think in the end, the biggest reason why these games have such unreal grip on me is that they understand me like no other piece of media did. With all previous things I've been into, I was the one trying to understand them, but here, ironically considering my lore essays, it is understanding me. The despair, the endless existential crisis, the traumas, the doubts, the struggle to remember what's the reason to even live and hope is, observations on society I've had on instinctive level despite intellectual disabilities but could never articulate... the nightmares, too. But this is even better that I've found people who can understand me through how I understand it. I can't go back to how I used to socialise before the nightmare everything has been spiralling as for several years, the trust issues run far too deep and control me far too much, but I feel as alive as someone in my position could be here. And this matters.

[everythingblackblack]

Please tell me your DCMK OTPs, OT3s, OT4+s, BroTPs and NoTPS.

Canonical or otherwise, canon-compliant or completely adjacent (wrong word?).

Het, Yaoi, Yuri and poly all welcome!

I love your question, thanks for asking.<3 First of all, I must say that I am more of a fan of Magic Kaito than DetCo and that I am multishipper. Oh, please! Yours count too, maybe we are ship brothers.

My supreme OTPs (which I will order from my favorite to my least favorite): Shinichi x Kaito: I really like rivals to lovers, okay? They have two very gay songs, I don't think I need to say much.

Akako x Kaito: And I like enemies to lovers too much. She tried to kill him, but he still saved her.

Aoko x Hakuba: I have these little crumbs of Aoko x Hakuba, and I don't know, the fact that she has his phone number, it made my mind think "I think they would look cute together".

Also, the fact that their dynamic is somewhat similar to Iida x Ochako made me pay attention to them a lot.

Sonoko x Ran:

Oh yeah, I like friends to lovers too.

They have shared interests, how much they care for each other, I think they are quite cute together. There are two movies in particular that shaped my liking for them, where they both face the pirates and where Ran loses her memory.

Ships I like (but not as much as the ones above): Aoko x Akako: Aside from Kaito, Aoko is the only one who makes Akako blush. Also the fact that Akako is willing to protect her instead of hurting her.

Kaito x Saguru: I have an obsession with rivals to lovers, okay?

OT4: Ekoda Gang. Kaito should stay with the 3, Keiko is the spinster friend.

Kaito x Keiko: One day I was just rambling and it occurred to me. I had no light, I was bored, I thought it was reasonable.

Akai x Akemi: It makes me laugh a lot that they met because she ran him over with her car.

Kazuha x Hattori: Kazuha is great, Hattori makes me laugh so much, I don't know what else to say.

Finally, I will comment that I like HeiShin as an incredible BrOTP. I really like the headcanon where Kazuha thinks Hattori is in love with Shinichi. I'm sure I have more ships, but I can't think of anything else right now, so I'll leave you with those. Oh yeah! I like KaiAo and ShinRan, but only because they're canon, I don't really think about them that much and if I had to choose one of the two, I guess I'd choose KaiAo because I'm obsessed with Kaito. And I only have 1 NOTP, I don't like kogoro x eri, I just don't, I can't. THIS REMINDS ME THAT I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE YUUSAKU X YUKIKO, AND TOICHI X CHIKAGE. I have a love-hate relationship with Kaito's parents, I like to make fun of Toichi (a lot) but well, before all the fuss about his parenting, they were some of my favorites.

[dadkisser15]

I’m actually going to cry why do I miss him so much right now ☹️

He’s asleep and I don’t really want to sleep yet because I want to speak with him but I’m just doomscrolling on TikTok as one does and I decided that I missed his face and opened up my camera roll and he sent me this picture that his brother took of him sleeping earlier and it’s just so cute. Oh there’s tears in my eyes I really really like this man ,,,,,

He just looks so beautiful, he wouldn’t believe me if I told him that but I really do just adore his features. (If we had kids oh my godddd. I know that’s crazy that I’m even thinking that but I CANNOT HELP MYSELFF!!!) I love his eyes and his long lashes, I love his beautiful brown hair (especially when it’s messy) , his cute scruffy facial hair and his side burnnsssssssss. Oh and his nose, especially in the picture i mentioned earlier ohhhh my gosh it just looks so amazing. He dislikes his nose so much and constantly makes jokes about reducing the size of it and it upset me a lot because I really do believe it’s beautiful. To me it’s like a work of art, when I was doing more character art my favorite thing to draw was noses !! His nose shape was literally my favorite type to draw and I feel like that makes him very special. Like, wow this boy I’m insanely infatuated with is quite literally a work of art. I’m still looking at the picture and I didn’t mention earlier but I love his cute little mustache, everytime I look at it I just wonder how it would feel to his him and feel that brush against my lip, would it even? I’m not sure, I kinda forgot how it feels like to kiss someone but I’d love to relearn with him. That feels a tad inappropriate to say but I really do feel that way. I’m not feeling really sad anymore but I’m also just upset by the fact that I was even missing him even though I spoke to him a couple hours ago. He literally told me before going to bed not to miss him too much and i thought to myself, “that’s silly, it’s just a couple hours and I’ll be fine” and I hate to say it but he was right. I hate how he knows how my brain works, well.. I don’t hate it. It’s just embarrassing how predictable I am, maybe I’m just boring but who reallly knows.!!! Oh and I was so upset because he left me on sent for a little while see actually I’m okay with that but I just didn’t know what he was doing and that was upsetting me and because I didn’t know my brain immediately jumped to overthinking so I kinda just upset myself. I know verrry dumb but that’s just how I am, I’m always just thinking of the what’s if and I made myself feel bad for no reason. Maybe I do need a lobotomy but what if my overthinking was right. What do I do then!!!!! Be the other woman ? FUCK NOOOOOO !!!!!! I’d rather get stabbed in the arm five times in the same spot okay wait that actually sounds deranged but listen I just would not like being a second option or some stupid shit like that and my insecurities are just jumping out at me and making me think I am but guys, wtf do I do actually if I am ??? 😨 KMS??? That’s also crazy and dramatic so no but I pray that this boy is not trying to do me dirty because I think I’d genuinely lose my mind. Can we just eviscerate all his female friends? Like genuinely, just treat them like fish or something idk 😜!! Sorry thatsss meannnnnn. He can have female friends i guessss 😒. I personally believe they shouldn’t be doing no corny shit with my boy though like cutesy nicknames or making them match with him like FUCKKKKNOOOOOOOOOO .!! 😭😭😭 THAT ALONE IS 50 FUCKING BODIES.

50 FUCKING BODIES !!!!

Kidding, I can’t do shit about that except SEETHE and that I will do!! I’m currently seething thinking about it right now. God, liking a boy with female friends is not for the weak because I am the weak and I cannot take this. Maybe it’s all the over thinking but this shit making me feel sick to my stomach.hhhhh. Oh my god can god take me right now because the thoughts that are going through my head right now might make me just pass away rn to just meeet him. Oh I wanna cry! WHATEERVEVEGER I’ll stay jealous, mad and seething like crazy. I just wish I could have him in my arms and just have him as mine. If he gets tired yeah he can leave but for now I’d just like to have him. Like ohh calm down guys you can have him back after like 2 weeks just let me have him for a while!!! I just want to treat him good and make him feel good. Ohhhhh guys don’t start throwing up pitchforks just because I want to keep him busy for a while, yall will get him back don’t worry 😒. Jeeeeezzzzzzus! Okay I thought that bit was funny. I’m not saying he should isolate himself or anything but like guys do we need female friends 🙄🙄🙄. Joking JOKINGG PUT THE PITCHFORKS DOWNN GUYS IT WAS A JOKE!!! Anyways I should conclude this dumb rant because nothing about this will change and I will forever be salty. OH MY GOD salty is the perfect way to describe how I’ve been feeling!! It’s like I’m jealous but I can’t do shit so all I can do is let this feeling linger and be salty because I’m very non confrontational at times and especially when I don’t want to be verbal about my feelings. OHH LINGER BY THE CRANBERRIES

DO YOU HAVE TO LET IT LINGERRRRE DO YOU HAVE. TO LET IT LINGERRRR

[introvert--weeb]

Hello! Hooe your having a nice day! So please hear me out! Can i request for Mikey, draken, mitsuya,nahoya, ran,rindou,hanma,and baji with a sweet s/o but have a brutal threat to someone with sweet smile and said " were enjoying our day... Can you please kindly fuck off before i lose my cool and chop your dick/rip your ovary? " when someone interrupt them in date by flirting with either of you

Gotta get some jealous vibes on this blog one way! I love this idea! I hope you don't mind that I edited the line a little for each scenario so I don't end up writing the exact same dialogue over and over again

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy it!!

--

Mikey, Draken, Mitsuya, Nahoya, Ran, Rindo, Hanma, Baji on a date that gets interrupted

TW: mentions of threats, language, jealousy, cringe-y insults that authour has made up based around the prompt :)

--

Mikey

It had all started off as a normal date between the two of you. Mikey had insisted that you both visit this new dessert cafe that had opened up not that long ago in Shibuya. He had been saving it as a date idea and resisted the urge to demand Draken to take him. It was torture for the sweet-tooth but it would be worth it when you both could experience it together.

You were as equally as excited as your boyfriend. It had been months since you were both able to just go on a date alone. After all, every other time someone who always show up and it would quickly devolve into a hang out session. Today though, Mikey had made sure to express how this time was just between you and anyone who dared interrupt will be dealt with. Sounds threatening but it mainly meant they would have to make it up to the two of you by buying bag loads of desserts for a week. Childish but effective.

It wasn't long until you were both seated at a table, one that was directly by the window. You couldn't believe how perfect this place was! The tables held a menu that was shaped as a crepe and even the napkins that were available had desserts printed along the surface. It was just so cute!

Nothing could do anything to ruin this date for you. You both ordered your favourite desserts (Mikey had to order something other than dorayaki and so simply ordered ice cream) and were now just waiting for the order to be brought over. All was well in the cafe.

That was until a girl around your age had approached the table. At first, you thought she might know Mikey or was maybe one of Emma's friends who simply wanted to say hi. However, that was quickly thrown out when she began to flirt with your boyfriend, twirling a strand of light brown hair around her finger. You simply watched, anger bubbling dangerously in your chest and you had to keep yourself from beating her ass. She must know you were there, after all, you were right beside her.

"Can you please stop flirting with my boyfriend?" You forced a dangerously sweet smile on your face. "We are enjoying our date. So please kindly fuck off before I rip your ovaries from your body," your tone didn't match your words. Every word was dripping in honey yet your eyes screamed 'murder'.

Mikey couldn't hold back his grin from how you threatened the girl. He knew you could be intimidating but this threat was something that amused him immensely. Rip her ovaries out? Over simply trying to flirt with him? Well, he sure couldn't get any more smug. You loved him that much, huh?

"Wow Y/N, never knew you could be so intimidating," the blond joked, amusement glinting in his dark irises. You simply blushed, feeling a little embarrassed but mainly proud of yourself.

The two of you continued on with your date as the waiter brought your desserts to the table. You couldn't have asked for a better day with your Mikey.

Draken

Draken had suggested that you both go to the beach for the day since the weather was so warm. You had packed a picnic for the two of you, wearing cute swimwear underneath a f/c t-shirt and shorts. Slipping on a pair of sandals, Ken had arrived not too long after and you were both off on your way to your destination.

You had both found the perfect spot and set up the towels. Draken simply threw his shirt off as he was already wearing his swim shorts, while you began to strip yourself of the outerwear. Your boyfriend couldn't stop staring once he realised how good you looked in the swimwear.

However, he wasn't the only one to notice and in fact, a group of boys had taken notice and were ogling at your now exposed figure. Draken nor yourself noticed and continued to enjoy your time together. After all, this was quite rare nowadays since Mikey would take up a lot of the blond's time. You didn't mind, it just made days like this extra special and much more enjoyable.

Ken had offered to grab the two of you drinks from the beach stall not too far from where you were situated. You were appreciative for the offer and asked your boyfriend to grab you your favourite cold beverage. He agreed before placing a soft kiss to your forehead, standing up to complete the errand.

It hadn't even been two minutes since the tall blond had left your side before one of the boys had approached you. If it wasn't for the cocky attitude that practically oozed out of him, you would have waved him off with a smile and an apology. In fact, you had tried. He just seemed to be incapable of taking no as an answer or accepting that you were with Draken and that's who you were going to remain with.

Speaking of Draken, he was beginning his way back to where you were, cold beverages in his hands. Everything seemed fine until he noticed the boy trying his hardest to flirt with his partner. No. He wasn't going to have that. And so your boyfriend began his march over to the towel, ready to smash his fists into this idiot's face once he had handed you your drink. However, as he got close enough, his anger and jealousy dissolved into pure amusement.

"Right, this obviously isn't getting through your stupidly thick skull," a heavy sigh indicated how annoyed you had become. "I am enjoying my date with my boyfriend and I really don't need you ruining it. Now, kindly fuck off back to wherever you crawled out from before I chop your dick off and ram it down your throat!" The smile that accompanied your words was too sweet for the threat. It was as if two personalities were clashing together in this one moment.

The boy, now scared for his own safety, was quick to scurry back to his friends. Draken watched before taking his rightful place at your side once again. Cold beverage now handed to you, he opened his own before taking a large mouthful. It cooled him down instantly and a breath of relief was released.

"So... About you threatening that boy..." Draken couldn't stop the smirk that tugged at his lips as your face instantly burned a bright pink. He was going to enjoy teasing you about this.

Mitsuya

The two of you were hanging out at the park with Luna and Mana. Takashi had invited you with him since the girls were asking about playing with you again. Ever since you both started dating, you had grown close to the two small girls, almost acting like an older sibling in some ways.

Luna and Mana were playing on the play equipment while you and Takashi were relaxing on a nearby bench, keeping an eye on the two young children. An arm around your shoulder as the two of you conversed about your weeks. You had a simple week so far; school and homework, while Mitsuya spoke about his Home Ec Club and the basics of his Toman life.

The date couldn't have been going any better, in your opinion. You were spending much needed time to unwind and be around the sweetest boy you knew. There was very little that could ruin this date, right? Well, Takashi had left the bench to make sure his sisters were entertained and safe. You had told the boy that you would watch over his jacket and bag, a soft smile directed in his direction before he went onto the playground.

Moments later and Takashi looked over towards where he had left you with his belongings. He was expecting to see you maybe scrolling through your phone or even looking over to watch the siblings. However, the sight that greeted him caused his blood to boil slightly and his jaw to clench. Some random boy had decided to begin flirting with you and it looked like you were quickly getting fed up with the advances. Telling Luna and Mana that he was going to check on you, he began to make his way back to you.

"C'mon beautiful! Just give me a chance!" Even his voice was starting to grate on Mitsuya's nerves. If he carried on, Takashi would not hesitate to teach him a lesson, even if it went against his more peaceful ways.

"Listen. For one, I don't know you nor do I wish to get to know you. Another thing, I have a boyfriend and we are currently on a date so he should be back soon. Finally, please fuck off before I rip off your nuts and use them to feed the damn squirrels!" You smiled softly at the boy, your eyes glinting with actual intent on carrying through with the threat. That was enough to scare the boy and for Mitsuya to chuckle to himself.

He understood how vicious you could get when you used your words. It was what had first got him to notice you after all. Internally, he was still seething at how the boy had tried to take what was his, but outwardly, the lilac-haired male gave you a soft smile and sat back down next to you.

Nahoya

Of course the two of you would be hanging out at the arcade. After all, you were both competitive and would settle disagreements with games. The current disagreement had came to be settled with a game of House of the Dead, a zombie shooting game. You would both take a turn and then whoever had gotten the furthest into the game would win this argument. Sure it was costing you more than if you were playing casually but this was your pride on the line here.

Currently, you were winning and Nahoya was refusing to back down. It got to the point where Smiley had dragged you away from the House of the Dead machine and decided this disagreement would be decided through the basketball hoop games. After all, he was much better at this than the shooting games. You just agreed, now enjoying the time you both were spending together as well as how desperate your boyfriend was becoming.

This had quickly evolved into a date, no matter how much Nahoya was insisting it was to settle the disagreement. In fact, he was enjoying himself and kept dragging you from one game to another. At this point, neither of you could remember the initial disagreement that started your trip to the arcade.

Collecting armfuls of tickets, your boyfriend had suggested you both head over to the prize counter to cash them in for a prize that you both could enjoy. And so you made your way to the counter where a girl a little older than you was stationed, looking bored out of her mind. That was until she had caught sight of Smiley. In an instant, she had gone from bored to cheerful and more than happy to help.

Nahoya had allowed you to choose the prize since, although he hated to admit it, the majority of the tickets were yours. However, your answer on what prize you wanted had fallen on deaf ears. In fact, this girl seemed too busy ogling at your boyfriend and trying to appear as appealing as she could. Not that Nahoya noticed.

You tried one more time only to be met with the same result. Part of you wanted to beat this girl's face yet the other part found yourself proud that you had been the one to get someone as desirable as Smiley. However, this was quickly dissolving into jealous anger as she reached across and 'accidentally' brushed against Nahoya's hand as she took the tickets he held. "Oops, sorry~!" Her voice was getting on your nerves along with those flirtatious giggles and glances.

"If you wish to keep your arms and ovaries where they belong, I recommend you stop flirting with my boyfriend and get the damn prize I have asked for twice. Please and thank you!"

Smiley was surprised at your actions. You never usually get so jealous. He noticed how you smiled at the girl, almost gritting your teeth behind the barrier of your closed lips. Nahoya couldn't help but find it so cute and savoured the moment. He was definitely going to be bragging to the boys later on about how badass you seemed right then.

The girl clicked her tongue before going off to collect what you had asked for. She must have been salty over the fact she couldn't continue to flaunt off her assets to Nahoya. What she didn't know though was that she was simply saving herself from your wrath. After all, you were not past dragging her outside to defend what was rightfully yours if she kept testing her luck.

"Remind me to never get on your bad side, babe!" Smiley joked, his usual grin growing. You simply rolled your eyes while agreeing with the peach-haired Kawata.

It wasn't long until you had your prize choice in your possession and the two of you continued what had quickly become a date. That meant a bike ride around Shibuya, heading to the local ramen shop that Smiley loved, and then back to either his or your house to watch a movie.

Ran

You would follow your boyfriend anywhere when you could spare the time. Currently, you were clinging to the taller Haitani's arm while Rindo was talking to his elder brother about some gang business. Although you were always around, you never did get involved in their conversation. After all, Ran had told you were too innocent and sweet to get involved in such a violent life. He did everything he could to protect you from his lifestyle.

Due to how intimidating Ran could look and act, you really didn't have to worry about girls trying to flirt with him, and guys knew who he was so there was no way they would risk it. And so you had no reason to be jealous. Ran however, he was constantly on edge in case someone decided to try and steal you away from him. But then he would remember that no-one would dare mess with the Haitani brothers and everything would be fine again.

"Babe? I just need to nip into the convenience store real quick." You pointed over to where the closest one was situated, remembering how you needed some odd bits of things. Your boyfriend simply nodded in acknowledgement, placed a quick peck on the top of your head before continuing his conversation with Rindo. Smiling over the affection, you quickly made your way to your destination. The quicker you got there, the sooner you could be back with Ran after all.

It was a pretty normal trip for you. You had collected all the items you needed, paid for them and started your way back to where your boyfriend and his brother were probably still waiting. Maybe they had finished the gang discussions and you could join in with whatever the next topic was! You sure hoped so since it was starting to get you down not being able to contribute to the conversation. It was as you stepped back onto the street that a boy had stopped you, a nervous yet confident look in his eyes.

Ran would occasionally shift his gaze from his younger brother towards the store you had entered. It was his way of making sure you were safe. After all, there were a lot of people in Roppongi that disliked the Haitani brothers due to their position. Anyone could decide to take out their grudge against him on you and he would not be having that.

It was one of the times when he glanced up that he had noticed the boy talking to you. Your facial expression was telling him that you were quickly losing patience and that something must be happening. Ran interrupted Rindo mid-sentence before trying to casually make his way over. After all, it could be nothing and he wasn't the one to jump to conclusions about a situation. However, he had a hard time keeping his anger in check once he heard the boy's flirting. It was just too bad the rod was left at home.

"You're either deaf or really stupid. I have said that I need to get back to my boyfriend. Now please, fuck off before I chop your dick off and turn your balls into fuckin' earrings," your expression was really sweet when you had uttered the threat. Your lips were curled into a soft smile while your eyes had shut to hide the murderous aura that would surely be seen within them. Maybe Ran was rubbing off on you too much. After all, you used to be such a sweet person who was unable to say boo to a goose. Now you were making threats that even had your boyfriend nervous.

The boy was quick to follow your advice, walking as fast as he could away from the area. You let out a deep sigh before moving your gaze to where Ran and Rindo would be situated. Instead, you were surprised to find the taller Haitani frozen in place not far from you.

"Hey baby! I got my things!" The hand carrying the bag lifted to display the items. Ran snapped out of this daze before giving you a soft smile. He would have to tell Rindo to not piss you off.

Rindo

Nobody would believe you but Rindo loved taking you to cafes that he would come across when he and his brother wandered the streets of Roppongi. It was more to make you happy but he really enjoyed these outings. He could spoil you with your favourite drink and dessert while it was a quiet space for you both to talk about your days. It was one of the only places where Rindo could get away from all the gang business. Here he was just Rindo Haitani, your boyfriend.

You both arrived at one of your favourite cafes, ready to start the first half of your date. Rindo had planned the day so you were unsure on what would occur but that just made it more exciting! Taking your usual table at the back, Rindo couldn't help but chuckle as he watched you scan the menu. He knew you would pick the same thing every time you visited and yet it was almost a ritual you had developed. Sit at the table, scan the menu, decide to have the same thing. He found this adorable and enjoyed the predictability of the situation. Made him feel like a normal middle-schooler for once.

It wasn't long until the waitress had come over to take your orders. You noticed how she must have been new since you had never seen her working here before. At least she wouldn't judge that you ordered the same thing, you thought. The exchange was starting well, she had taken your order with very little hassle which you appreciated. However, it turned sour when she turned her attention to your boyfriend. It was as if a switch was flicked within the waitress as she began to get a little too comfortable around the blond.

Small arm touches when pointing at something on the menu, leaning over so her cleavage was more pronounced, the flirty heart eyes and giggles. All of it was beginning to irk you. Surely she could discern for herself that this was a date. You really couldn't believe the nerve the girl had in doing what she was doing while you sat across from the scene. Thankfully, she had finally taken the order and went to grab the drinks and desserts.

"You OK babe?" Rindo noticed how your usual smile was tense and more forced in its appearance. It was concerning him since you were fine a moment ago. This poor boy didn't realise how much the waitress was flirting, if he even registered that there was flirting. It's not his fault really. He just hardly gets attention when they could simply flirt with his brother.

You didn't answer, just relaxed a little bit. You couldn't get mad at the blond in front of you. After all, he was clueless when it came to girls liking him. Really, you should have kept that in mind considering how long it took for you both to get together due to his obliviousness to that. Slowly your usual smile was reappearing and Rindo felt like he could relax again himself. That was until the waitress came back over.

"Here's your order, handsome! And a little something extra~!" The girl winked as she placed your boyfriend's drink and dessert in front of him. You had caught sight of a slip of paper and what appeared to be a lipstick kiss staining the surface. Oh hell no. This was not on. It was hurting your face by trying to maintain the sweet expression.

"Excuse me but can you not flirt with my boyfriend while I am sat right here?" Keep up the smile Y/N. "After all, we are on a date and before you decided to act like a desperate hooker, we were actually enjoying ourselves. So now that we have our order, can you please fuck off before I decide to rearrange your face and make it so you can't have children?"

Rindo's eyes were as wide as the plates that held the desserts. He didn't really know what to think at that moment. What had happened to his sweet Y/N? Where did you learn to threaten someone? What he wasn't realising was that he was rubbing off on you after all this time you spent together.

The waitress simply glared at you before storming off back to the counter. She must have seen just how serious you were being even though your face had remained as sweet as sugar throughout it. You were proud of yourself and turned your attention from the girl towards your dessert and drink. In excitement, you grabbed at the spoon and scooped some of the sweet dessert into your mouth like a small child would with ice cream. A happy hum left your body as you enjoyed your treat.

"You're scary, you know that right babe?"

"I'm just protecting what's mine, Rin."

Hanma

Hanma enjoyed having you around him most of the time. He loved how you made his days more fun, especially when it came to how jealous you would get. In fact, he thought it was probably one of the most amusing sights he had been blessed with. You were so sweet usually that it was a huge surprise to others when you got jealous.

That day, the lanky male had decided to take you to the amusement park, thinking it was the best way to spend his time away from Kisaki. It was also a good way to get you to cling to him as you were always nervous when it came to certain rides like the Ferris Wheel. You could handle rollercoasters and other rides, but once you were sat on the rickety bench of the Ferris Wheel, you would have to cling onto your boyfriend's arm in fear of falling out.

Just like most of the others, it was rare for you to get some alone time with Shuji anymore. After all, if he wasn't busy with Kisaki, he was busy with something else. But you knew he would show up at your bedroom window most nights to just say hi and get a kiss before he left again. It wasn't an ideal relationship but it worked for you two.

So when Hanma had text you about the date, you were quick to get yourself ready. You made sure that your outfit was super cute and dolled yourself up a little. Hanma would no doubt tease you about how much effort you put in for him but you knew he secretly loved it. You were his girl after all and he was a lucky man to have you on his arm.

The journey from your house to the amusement park was a pretty uneventful one. Hanma had picked you up on his bike but had decided he would follow the rules of the road. As unpredictable as ever. He parked up his bike and you both went to buy your tickets to start the date properly.

The day was spent like any other amusement park date people went on. You rode the rollercoasters and ate your fair share of snacks that you knew weren't good for you. Everything was perfect. Well, if you excluded having to hold Hanma back from beating up a boy that had tried flirting with you. That took some doing since an angry Hanma is a strong Hanma.

It was as the sun was starting to set that the incident occurred. A girl with long blond hair had decided that she would try her luck in getting THE Shuji Hanma. All while you were standing there, cuddling into his arm. At first, you tried being polite by making your presence known. If she knew he was already taken then she should lose interest and move on with her day. What wishful thinking, eh? Instead, it seemed to spur her on more, even commenting on how Shuji deserved a 'real woman' not a 'child'. That was the last straw.

"I don't know whether you are blind, stupid or have a fuckin death wish at this point." You let go of Hanma's arm and stepped towards the annoyance. "But as you could clearly see, Hanma is taken. Now, unless you want me to put you six feet under, I suggest you fuck off and leave my boyfriend alone."

Maybe it was the sweet smile that accompanied the threat but the girl was scared. You were obviously crazy, she thought as she rushed back over to her group of friends. She was probably lucky to only get off with the verbal threat. If she hadn't have left, you would have caused a lot of injuries to her. After all, you had to be strong enough to do that when Hanma was your boyfriend.

Speaking of Hanma, he had watched the whole exchange with an amused smirk on his face. This threat was tame compared to the others he had heard leave your mouth before. However, he was disappointed that the other girl ran off. He was hoping to see you make that threat a reality until he would have to stop you. However, he still got to see that cute angry pout that would always show up when you had calmed down.

"If only she had stuck around. Could have had some fun."

"Shut up beanpole."

Baji

Baji was the one who would mainly get jealous. After all, you were gorgeous and he felt he didn't deserve you. So when anyone paid a little too much attention to you than what he felt comfortable with, he would get annoyed and have to stop himself from getting violent.

You both had decided to hang out just the two of you for once. Chifuyu was busy working at the pet store after all so you could count that day as a date. Baji had his arm wrapped around your shoulders as you wandered the streets of Shibuya, entering stores that caught your attention.

The date was going well. Considering you both would usually have Chifuyu, and more recently Takemichi, joining you, it was nice to just have some time to be a couple without worrying about making the younger blonds feel like third and fourth wheels. That meant you couldn't really enjoy innocent physical contact like this without feeling guilty. So this was rare and you were enjoying it a lot.

"Hey sweetie, you want to go get some Peyoung Yakisoba?" Baji asked, starting to direct you towards the usual spot you would get the delicious dish. You weren't sure why he asked considering he knew the answer would be yes. So with a giggle, you snuggled into the boy's side with a grin.

Baji felt his heart skip about 10 beats at the sight. You were honestly too cute for him and moments like this proved it.

The walk was only a few minutes but you remained glued to the boy's side the entire way. It was your favourite spot to be. Baji had offered to go and order the noodles while you wait outside, something that you reluctantly agreed to. You only agreed since the noodle shop was so small that you couldn't realistically stick by your boyfriend. And so you sat on the bench not too far from the door.

Baji wanted to be quick, not entirely comfortable with you sitting alone. Usually Chifuyu would keep you company and that kept the boy calm but since he wasn't here, you were forced to be alone. And that didn't sit right with the 1st Division Captain.

You kept yourself entertained by scrolling through your phone but that was short-lived as a boy a little older than you turned up. Placing a smile on your face, you decided to hear out what the boy might want. After all, it could be as innocent of a request as asking for directions. However, you were a bit too naive in that regard.

Your boyfriend exited the building, the noodles in hand, when he saw the boy flirting with you. Anger bubbled almost instantly within his chest and he was about to march over and pummel this idiot into the ground. It was only what you said next that had him stop in his war path.

"As I have said about 14 times now, I have a loving boyfriend and if you think I'm going to leaving him for a limp dick like you, you're delusional. Now, fuck off before I chop your shrimp dick off and offer it to the restaurant to use in one of their dishes. Although there wouldn't be enough to use in even a kiddie's portion." You delivered the threat with your usual smile yet Baji could see that your eyes were sending daggers the boy's way.

Baji couldn't be more proud of you for how you threatened that idiot. It amused him so much that he couldn't prevent the laughter that erupted from him. The boy who had previously seemed filled with confidence, was now running off in fear that you would follow through with the threat. You just glanced over at your amazing boyfriend with a grin on your features.

"C'mon babe, we're heading home. I'm so proud of how you handled that though." Baji calmed his laughter before placing a kiss to your forehead. Arm wrapped around you, the two of you headed towards the apartment building Baji lived in.

[mypoisonedvine]

Animalistic | dark!Peter Parker x reader

summary: your friend Peter has a crush on you, everybody knows it, nobody does anything about it. except, of course, when he gains new powers and loses control of his affections.

word count: 3k

warnings: smut! (non con), degradation, creampie kink, choking, forced begging, peter overall being a huge asshole, everybody is 18+ but heavily implied to be high school seniors

a/n: okay so this was actually inspired by a scene from an episode of buffy (lol) so if you’re a fan and you recognize some of this dialogue then that’s why! I pretty much had to write this as soon as it ended because it was so hot jfc

Peter had always acted slightly strange around you. Not all the time; he was one of your best friends, and 99% of the time you felt completely comfortable around him.

But that 1%... when you went to pool parties together, when you asked him to turn around while you changed, when you bumped into him at Homecoming last year and he looked at you in a way that was definitely more than friendly…

Everyone knew he had a crush on you, they told you constantly. It was pretty much an open secret at this point, you were pretty sure that he knew you knew, and so everyone just knew but never talked about it. Even though it was getting more awkward by the minute as a result, you didn’t see any reason for it to change.

What you didn’t know was that something had changed, something you could never understand fully but which had transformed your friend completely. He had gained new strength, a new power his body could barely handle; and with it, everything he needed to take what he had wanted and longed for but never before could’ve attained.

What you didn’t know was that, while you were cleaning up the AV club meeting room after school, when the building was nearly deserted and the sun was beginning to set, Peter had already found you, and watched you, and waited for the right moment to use his powers of stealth to sneak up behind you. He whispered your name, just past your shoulder, and you whipped around suddenly.

“Peter!” you yelped, stepping back slightly— but he took a step closer. When you stepped to the side to get past him, he stepped just a moment faster and blocked your way. It was like a waltz, but significantly more terrifying. Instantly you knew this was not the Peter you were used to. This was not your best friend, this was not the guy who had laughed with you and cried with you and been by your side all through high school. This was somebody else… and he was way too close for comfort.

“Where are you going?” he asked with a little smirk, dripping with the confidence that you weren’t going anywhere. When you tried to run, he grabbed you; when you tried to break free, he pushed you to the ground, pinning you by your wrists.

“Get off of me!” you cried.

“Is that really what you want?” he pressed. “‘Cause I think you want me. I think you didn’t want to admit it before, but you’re attracted to me— and it’s okay! It’s good. God, I’ve been waiting for so long for you to just accept it…” he trailed off as one hand released your wrist so it could brush across your face.

You swung your freed hand at him, landing a punch; when he raised his hands to his cheek, you managed to squirm out from under him and get to your feet. You hadn’t even taken a step towards the door yet when he had already gotten up and stood in your way, shrugging off the punch like it was nothing as he stalked towards you.

Remember what you learned in Tae Kwon Do, you repeated like a chant in your mind, holding your fists up in a blocking stance, stumbling slightly when you backed into a desk behind you. “I don’t wanna hurt you, Peter.”

He lunged forward and grabbed you, roughly slamming you against the wall as he pinned you again and you sobbed with terror. “Do you wanna hurt me now?” he taunted. “Go ahead and try, I like seeing you fight—” he leaned in closer, until you could feel his breath against your ear— “and knowing it’s fucking useless.”

“S-stop,” you whimpered, “Peter, please— this isn’t you.”

“But it is me, sweetheart,” he growled, smiling with teeth so much sharper than you remembered. “Did you really think I’d wait forever, crushing on you from the sidelines, watching you date all those douchebags who didn’t ever treat you right and never taking you for myself? I was just puny little Peter, your dumb geeky friend you thought you were too good for.”

“No!” you denied. “No, Peter, I never thought that.”

“You like ‘em mean, don’t you?” he chuckled, ignoring you completely. “That’s why you keep dating these guys who treat you like crap. You want mean, you want dangerous, you want strong and brutal and… animalistic. I can do that. I can do mean.”

“Peter, please don’t—”

He took a long, slow breath in through his nose, letting his eyes fall shut as he smiled with satisfaction. “You don’t need to be so scared,” he whispered, “but I kinda like it. The more I scare you, the better you smell.”

You opened your mouth to ask what the fuck he was talking about, but words didn’t come to you as he leaned in and attaching his lips to your neck, licking and sucking at your pulse point. A breathless whimper spilled out from between your lips as you shivered beneath him, feeling his smile of satisfaction on your skin.

He kicked your legs apart, slotting his body between them and laughing as he rocked his hips against yours; but he wasn’t laughing at that, he was laughing at the fear he must have smelled on you when you felt his hard cock between your legs. “Hmm, you’re thinking it’s a little big, right? You’re thinking ‘wait a second, how am I supposed to take all that?’ Don’t worry, sweetheart, you’re gonna love it. You’re gonna love coming all over this thick, aching cock…”

He purred— a low, deep sound that echoed through his chest and rattled your heart— as he started to pull your jacket off roughly, not finding your resistance much trouble at all. Your shirt, though, he ripped through like it was paper; you winced and looked away, unable to stomach the sight of him licking his lips as he tore through your bra, too.

“Look at these pretty tits,” he cooed, reaching up to grab them roughly, twisting the nipples and watching them harden under his ministrations. “You like that, huh? You like having your tits played with? Is this how your asshole exes did it, too?”

You shook your head, afraid that he would hurt you more if you didn’t answer at all.

The relief you experienced when he took his hands off of your chest was short-lived, as his touch drifted down to your jeans instead.

“No, Peter,” you gasped, your eyes shooting open as he glared back down at you while he unbuttoned and unzipped your fly. “Wait, wait, you don’t— you don’t have to do this.”

“I know. I want to,” he asserted as he roughly pulled your jeans— and panties— down to your ankles. You cried as he instantly dove in between your legs, licking you eagerly, holding you down with a vice-tight grip on your thighs. Every movement of his tongue shot jolts of pleasure up your body, making your head fall back against the wall. “Fuck,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by your sex in his mouth, “your pussy is fucking delicious, sweetheart.”

When you tried to push him away, all you managed to do was card your fingers through his hair, and he grinned before latching his lips onto your clit. You cried out, your hips bucking and quivering against his face.

“You gonna come, honey? You’re so close, I can taste it…”

“No,” you denied, “no— you’re wrong, I don't—”

“You like it,” he snarled. “You like how it feels when I fuck you with my tongue. See?” Just for emphasis, he had to thrust his tongue inside you, making the most filthy squelching noises as the wetness of his mouth collided with the wetness your body had produced for him so easily. “Just come,” he encouraged. “It’ll make you nice and tight for when I put my cock in you.”

You fought it with everything in you, but with the way he held you down and forced the barrage of sensation on you, it was impossible to avoid. Disturbingly, it was not in spite of the fear that you hit your peak; if anything, it actually made it stronger, mixing with your arousal to create a delicious sickness in your gut as the coil snapped and you gasped his name, falling apart atop his face as your thighs clamped down on his head against your will.

When his tongue broke away from you, pulling back with a come-slickened grin, you shuddered. “Was that so hard?” he faux-pouted. “I knew it. I knew you wanted me. See how good I can make you feel? Well, it’s only gonna get better.”

“W-wait,” you stammered as he stood up, but he paid no mind, grabbing you by the neck and forcing you to spin around and face the wall. He slapped your ass, hard, before you heard the sound of his belt being unbuckled. You didn’t see it, you never saw it, but you felt it as he pressed the hot, hard shape against you. You bit back a squeal as you felt how thick it was, tears striping your face as he laughed at you again: cruel, mocking, cold.

“Yeah, this cock’s gonna be inside you, sweetheart. Finally.”

“Don’t… please don’t…” you sighed weakly, just above a whisper.

He pulled your hips back roughly, forcing you to arch your back. You felt so exposed, almost like you were in display for him, as he teased your sensitive clit with the head of his cock. “You can keep begging if you want, it’s kinda cute.”

You knew you were past the point of stopping him, but you hoped you could at least reason with him slightly, or bargain with him in any way. “Please…” you whispered, “don’t make it hurt. Please just be gentle.”

He laughed. And he’d laughed so many times before, but this was different. This time was almost genuine, like it was actually funny to him. He laughed so hard that it sounded like he would lose his breath, until it all came to a sudden stop and he pressed his entire body against your back, growling into your ear: “No.”

He shoved his cock into you, all the way to the hilt, holding your hips still so he could bury himself in your heat. “Fuck!” he groaned, already pulling back and slamming into you brutally. “You’re so fucking tight, sweetheart.”

The praise made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, even with his warm breath against the skin there. His intrusion stung, made your insides burn with the force of his rough movements. Worst of all was how good it felt, against everything that made you want to hate it. His cock filled you better and reached deeper in you than anything ever had before, and your earlier orgasm made everything more sensitive. His balls were slapping against your clit with each thrust, and as lewd as it was, it was just as perfect as you shivered from every brief-yet-powerful touch.

Your sobs morphed to moans, exacerbated by his hands roughly grabbing your breasts again once his arms had wrapped around you.

“Oh, I know you love it so much,” he cooed with a taunting grin. “Tell me how good it feels.”

Before you’d even really gotten a chance to shake your head, he wrapped his hand tightly around your neck, cutting off your air as you opened your mouth in search of a breath you couldn’t reach.

“You get to breathe when you’re ready to be honest,” he explained gruffly, “with me and with yourself. Tell me,” he repeated, harsher than before, “how good it feels.”

As soon as he released his grip on your pulse, you cried out. “So good!” you sobbed. “So good, Peter, it f-feels so good…”

“Good enough to make you come?” he smirked. “I think so, with the way this needy little cunt is squeezing me so tight already. Are you close, baby? Fuck, I hope so, I wanna see you come for my cock.”

You breathed through your teeth, hoping you could will yourself not to, but at this point was it even worth the effort? Maybe giving into him really was the best thing— you’d already told him how good it felt, you’d already come from his mouth, you’d already pleaded weakly for him to be gentle only for him to fuck you with a vengeance. How much more dignity could you possibly lose?

“Beg me to let you come,” he instructed, “and then beg me to come inside you.”

Okay, so that’s a lot more dignity you had left to lose.

“N-no, Peter,” you whimpered, “I’m not— you can’t— I’m not on—”

You were cut off with a choke again, your cries sputtering into silence. “You should learn to do what you’re told,” he grunted. “I’ll keep choking you until you pass out, I don’t care. If you want to breathe, don’t take that air for granted. Beg.”

You shook your head against the grip on your neck, even with the spots of black dancing at the edge of your vision. Your hands clawed at his, uselessly fighting his impossible strength.

“Are you ready to beg yet, sweetheart?” he whispered. With hot tears filling your darkening eyes, you finally nodded. He let go and a gasp filled your lungs.

“Please, Peter,” you cried instantly, voice still hoarse and weak from the lack of air, “please— let me come. I wanna come for you, please…”

“That’s good,” he encouraged, “keep going.”

“Please!” you yelped, repeating it over and over until the word had lost all meaning and just because the noises of your despair as pleasure filled you past the point of no return. You were terrified of what would happen if you came without his permission, and worse, you were sure he would be able to tell since he could feel your walls pulsing and, apparently, smell your fear which was a horrifying thought.

“Okay, baby,” he groaned, pumping into you faster and harder until your hips were slamming into the wall in front of you painfully. “Go ahead and come for me.”

“Fuck!” you cried, your legs shaking as you tried to hold yourself up on wobbly knees, pleasure rocking your body ruthlessly and relentlessly. You heard him chuckle softly against your ear, mumbling his approval, but his words were just static in the pleasured haze of your mind, your body limp and drained of all fight as he used your body to chase his own high.

“Now beg me to come inside you,” he reminded you with a growl. “Beg me to fill up this little pussy with my come.”

“I can’t,” you breathed, barely audible.

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s not that hard. Are you too dumb to beg, little baby? Are you all stupid now that my cock’s in you?”

You whimpered but couldn’t muster words.

“All you can do is whine and cry like the dumb baby you are, hm? Then I don’t think you get to breathe anymore,” he frowned, disappointed as he tightened his hand around your neck again.

“Wait—” you pleaded with the last of your breath, feeling his grip hesitate. “Please,” you gasped, swallowing dryly to try to stomach your own words, “please come inside me… fill up my… my little pussy, with your come, please, Peter.”

He grinned, giving you a chaste kiss on the cheek. “Good job, sweetheart,” he praised, “you’re gonna get exactly what you’re asking for…”

You grimaced as you felt him start to flex and pulse inside you, warmth spreading between your legs and leaking out of you to drip down around his cock.

“Fuuuuuck,” he groaned slowly, your name leaving his lips in a sigh as he started to catch his breath.

And then it was just the two of you, alone in this empty classroom, sweaty and panting and sticky in the worst possible places.

The moment he pulled out of you and stepped back, his weight no longer holding you up against the wall, you crumpled to the floor. When he observed you lying there, he seemed proud of his work.

You sort of expected him to just leave you on the floor, but he was gentlemanly enough to help you up and even to pull your jeans up for you, dooming you to a fate of ruined panties as his come seeped from your abused entrance. Your shirt and bra were ruined, meaning you would have to put on your jacket and zip it up all the way to be able to get off of campus without some indecent exposure.

"This was fun," he announced, "we should do it again some time."

"Yeah, no thanks," you scoffed as you started to walk towards the door— but he stopped you by grabbing your arm, turning you to face him.

"You can go, for now," he hissed, "but I'm not anywhere near done with you. Understand?"

You nodded sheepishly, and he finally let go. Like you'd wanted to more than anything since he'd appeared behind you, you finally slipped out through the door. You tried not to think about what had just occurred. You tried not to think about his promise that it would happen again. You tried not to think about how he had made you come taster and harder than you ever had before.

Maybe he was right, and you really do like 'em mean after all.

[cantaloupe-draws]

El Chico del Apartamento 512

Irl! Quackity x Female! reader

Summary: Nothing interesting ever happens in the apartment complex you live in. It’s the same old routine for you. Constantly turning down your neighbor and heading too and from your apartment. Well that’s up until you meet the very cute boy that lives in apartment 512 that you can never seem to gather the courage to talk too. To make make matters worse, he shows up to the cafe you work at

Switches from Reader’s s POV to Quackity’s POV at the very end

Genre: Song fic, fluff, somewhat cafe trope, strangers to lovers, crushes

Warnings: use of Quackity’s real name, creepy neighbor, cursing, and I think that’s about it

Song :El Chico del Apartamento 512 by Selena

Lyrics are in bold

—

Every day is the same down the corridor

Every day it’s the same old thing. I pass the same old doors as I make my way towards my own at the end of the corridor. Counting the room numbers as I pass.

“508, 509, 510,-“ I count and but as soon as I reach room 511 the door suddenly swings forward and I’m greeted by both a whistle and Chad, my neighbor.

“Y/n baby I keep on waiting for you to go on a date with me like you promised,” Chad said as he stood in front of his door frame, right arm resting on the door. “I need to show you around town,” he said with a smirk as he rested his face on his fist.

I scoffed as I moved away from him, “The only thing you need right now is an urgent shower. You stink like a pig and it’s absolutely disgusting. Besides, I never promised you anything” I said, trying to continue on my way, but Chad just kept getting more and more persistent with every rejection. His nagging was getting annoying.

“Come Y/n I’ll take you to this bar across town, I’ll even pay for your drinks” he kept persisting.

You would think that any decent guy that’s asking you out on a date would obviously pay for them himself. It’s a given but this is Chad we’re talking about. I was sick of his terrible date ideas and I had to face him once again.

“Listen, I don’t know how many times I’ve told you this and how many times I’ll have to repeat it but, I don’t want to go on these stupids dates with you,” I told him as I rejected for what seemed to be the millionth time. And as soon as I said that the door beside us swung open.

Out came a young man wearing a navy blue cap that was covering almost the entirety of his hair but still managed to expose small tufts of dark brown hair from the sides. He looked up at the predicament Chad and I were both in and I was able to get a good look at him.

He had almond-shaped eyes that were a dark brown color and had various beauty marks scattered around his face. He was attractive. Very VERY attractive. Oh no I’m in deep shit, I thought to myself as I quickly turned away when I felt that I was staring at him for too long. He turns away from us and heads towards the elevator doors.

I stayed stunned for a few moments then turned to face Chad again, completely red in the face, dumbfounded, and at a complete loss for words. But before Chad could get another word out I quickly rushed to my apartment and leaned my back against the door once I got inside. My heart is beating fast and my chest feels tight and constricted. I quickly got myself a glass of water from my faucet and though it helped with my fast heart rate, it didn’t help the butterflies swarming around in my stomach. It might sound crazy but I think I’ve just met the man of my dreams.

Ever since then, I’ve made sure to take my sweet time walking down the corridor in hopes to see the cute boy from apartment 512 again. I’ve gone as far as to purposely make small talk and fake my interest in Chad in hopes to see him once more.

—

The boy from apartment 512 the one who makes my poor heart beat fast.

I walked into the elevator quickly pressing the button towards the first floor when I heard someone yell “HOLD THE DOOR PLEASE!”

Loud footsteps came barreling towards the elevator. The yell of itself was enough to get my blood pumping but, to make matters much worse it was the cute boy from apartment 512 who was coming towards me.

“Thank you so much,” he said out of breath once he got inside. He offered me a smile of gratitude as the elevator doors closed. I noticed that he wasn’t wearing a cap this time but, instead he was sporting a grey beanie with red and blue stripes.

‘He’s the most beautiful man I have ever seen in my entire life’ I internally screamed to myself.

“Yeah, no problem” I responded quietly in hopes I wouldn’t make a fool of myself.

Even if there weren't more than two pieces of dialogue uttered between us, it was enough for my heart to beat faster than the speed of light.

—

The boy from apartment 512 who causes me to stutter like I've never done before.

I was manning the cashier station at the cafe I worked at. It was filled to the brim with people who were either typing away on their laptops or having a conversation with their friends.

But on this day, I had finally learned his name.

The busy atmosphere had me tackling customers' orders from left to right, “Hello, may I take your order?” I said as the next customer approached me.

But surprisingly enough, I was greeted by a familiar face.

The cute boy from apartment 512.

“Yes, hello I would like a caramel macchiato please,” he said and I felt my face go red instantly.

Oh my god, it’s him again, I thought as I knew that my brain would start to scramble once more. “O-of course. Coming right up, n-name?” I asked him as I completely stumbled on my words.

“Alex,” he said, “Okay A-Alex your name will be called out when your order is ready,” I tell him as I continue on with my work.

My coworkers had never seen me lose composure like that. It was clear that they would never let me live this down but even if I made a complete fool of myself in front of him, a huge part of me also just wants to keep talking to him both night and day.

—

But today I have finally truly decided to confess my love to him

I mentally prepared myself for the next time I interacted with Alex. I’ve finally decided that the next time I would run into him, I would finally ask to get to know him better in hopes that one day friendship will blossom into a wonderful relationship. A giddy laugh escaped me as I thought of the idea.

The cafe was busy as usual, with the same groups of people coming in. As it hit peak rush hour the line of customers just kept getting longer and longer and I was attempting to quickly attend to them to the best of my ability. Somehow, this was not enough to deter the feelings of butterflies in my stomach.

I knock on his door and I get goosebumps,

a blonde answers the door and my heart breaks

As I heard the bell above our door ring once more I raised my head and saw him, Alex. He was holding the door open for a woman as she walked in. They stood close together as they waited in line. This might seem like a bit of an exaggeration but when I saw them conversing together waiting in line the butterflies that were once fluttering disappeared and were replaced with dread. As my heart dropped, I realized that one thing was wanting to be friends with him but, that doesn’t change the fact that I had grown feelings for him. If he’s in a relationship then, what now? I felt lost as to how to handle this.

As the line in front of me kept getting shorter and shorter, I was becoming anxious as his turn was approaching. Though as it was almost the pair’s turn to order, Alex suddenly turns around and leaves the line and when his turn arrives he still wasn’t there. Despite this, I still went ahead and tended his apparent girlfriend.

I truly felt my heart breaking into pieces when suddenly she asked:

"Were you looking for my brother?"

“Hello, may I take your order?” I asked her, “Yes, can I have a vanilla latte please? But um, can we wait a couple of minutes for my brother? He went to the restroom and didn’t tell me his order,” she asked. Then the realization hit me like a ton of bricks, this was his sister. I’m so dumb, how could I’ve not realized the resemblance between them?? “Yeah that’s no problem” I finally responded.

Soon enough Alex came rushing towards his sister, “I’m so sorry for the wait” he said once he reached the both of us. “Just hurry it up. I’ll be waiting for you at the table” His sister said as she turned her back to the both of us.

Turning my attention to him as I rang up his order he then speaks up “You’re one of my neighbors aren’t you?” He asks me with a grin. I stop in my tracks as if I’m a deer in headlights.

“Yeah I am actually” I smile at him trying to muster enough courage to continue our conversation.

“I thought so, you were the one who held the elevator door for me the other day right? Also, the one who was yelling at my neighbor.”

My face instantly goes red as I thought back to the first time I met Alex. “In my defense he deserved it. He’s been harassing me ever since I’ve moved in” I shudder at the thought of Chad.

“Yeah I’ve realized that he really is a douche, he enjoys banging on the damn walls at three in the morning” he said as we laugh together at the stupid things Chad has done.

“Okay, okay you’re order will be out shortly,” I tell him with a smile, feeling my heart skip a beat. But Alex doesn’t move from the line.

“To be honest the whole reason I even came here wasn’t really for a drink or anything.” He said gazing towards the floor and rubbed the back of his neck.

“This might be a bit sudden because we’ve barely met but I wanted to actually ask you for your number since you seem really nice and you’re very pretty. If you’re not interested then that’s fine, I’ll just take my drink and go” Alex said sheepishly.

After I heard these words I found myself dumbfounded. At a complete loss for words. ‘DID HE JUST SAY THAT??? HOW DO I RESPOND???’ and from there my mind was absolutely speeding to the point where I just stood there. ‘HURRY UP AND DO SOMETHING!!!’ I yelled at myself, but yet still nothing managed to escape. Alex began to fidget more and more playing with his hands as I just stood there without a response.

“It’s okay, I’ll just go now.” Alex quickly said leaving.

—

Alex’s POV

‘SHIT. FUCK. MOTHERFUCKER. STUPID IDIOT.’

I cursed at myself while I walked towards my sister. Laying my head on the table, covering it in utter embarrassment.

“That didn’t go well, did it?” My sister said while casually scrolling through her phone. “And here you were boasting about how much of a smooth talker you were. You sir, just got rejected.”

“Will you shut up?” I groaned at her not raising my head. I’m already embarrassed out of my mind and she is not making it any better.

“Fine fine, you big baby I’ll go get our drinks and then you can go home and cry.” She said standing up as our orders were called.

‘God, why did I think it was a good idea to bring my sister along? How had it not crossed my mind? I hadn’t even given it a second thought as to what I was gonna do if I did get rejected. And to make matters much worse I just got rejected in front of my sister. I will never hear the end of it at family reunions. I’m already mentally digging my grave when I heard my sister come back.

“I think this one is yours” She said as she placed my drink in front of me. I raise my head slightly so I would be able to see what was in front of me. I looked at my cup as it said:

‘To the cute boy from apartment 512’

‘xxx-xxx-xxxx -Y/n’

—

A/N- So this is the first time I’ve ever wrote fan fiction before, I mainly stick to drawing so please excuse any mistakes I tried my best. But I hope you liked it over all. Also the lyrics in English don’t make as much sense as they do in Spanish, and it’s was bugging me so if they seem a bit odd you know why.

A special thanks to @tofuyami she really helped me with the brainstorming and editing process <3

@hungoverhellhound @cherrysirin @tofuyami @nealocus @struggling-with-time @bugsinmycoldsoup @venusacrossthestars @galaxygnf

Also stand Selena always -🍈

[bisexual-bitch-blogs]

hi this is my first time sending a request like this, would it be ok to ask for a threesome with two mean doms zhongli and diluc, with maybe overstimulation, spanking, rough sex, choking, bondage, orgasm denial, degrading,,,, 👉👈 thank u so much for ur service 🙏

"Bullies"

Dom Diluc/Zhongli X Sub Fem Reader

That's a lot of kinks. But I'm not complaining. Um I did have not have any pics of Diluc and Zhongli together so I did a simple 5 sec editing and here ya go! Sorry this took so long. Thank you for reading!

POV You bought a new friend home. It's a harmless hydro slime and your boyfriends dont approve of it. You get pouty and they punish you

Includes: Overstimulation, Spanking, Rough sex, Choking, Bondage, Orgasm denial, degrading, Dacryphilia, dumbification

❤💛--------------------------------------💛❤

You were living every girl's dream. Dating Diluc, the stoic bartender and Zhongli, the walking history of Liyue book.

How did you attract them? Simple, you were a cute crybaby working as an adventurer. Not a surprise when their sadistic personas screamed to make you cry even harder.

Telling you right here and now. They're gentlemen in the streets but assholes in the sheets. You loved them with all your heart but they're so mean in bed. You can't even tell them to stop because they know you actually liked it.

Anyways, enough about them. After finishing your last commission, you bought a small blue slime home because it was so cute. Not only that. It was harmless seeing as it kept following you around like a dog. Carrying the bundle of joy in your arms, you entered Dawn Winery Manor, the workers stared in astonishment watching the hydro being nestled between your breast, purring.

Simultaneously, your lovers came out from wherever they were and greeted you.

"Welcome home, darling/dear-"

They were cut off, seeing the suppose hostile mob snoozing away in your embrace. You greeted them back.

"I'm home, Luc! Li!"

Zhongli's porcelain face scrunched up in disgust seeing the slimy creature. Why the hell did you bring it into their sleeping quarters? Is that thing just made a smug face at him?? Nah hes just delusional cuz of jealously and disgust or smth

Diluc doesn't hate slimes like the Geo Archon does but not does he like them either. Rather the crimson haired thought of them as nuisances to his business.

You asked.

"I found this slime following me and thought it was harmless. Why not take it home? Can we keep it please~?"

The males looked at each and nodded before turning back to look at you. They said.

"No."

You were taken back, baffled.

"What? Why??!"

The red haired male huffed, explaining.

"I probably would not mind, perhaps let you put it in a tank and take care of it however you know how Zhongli has a very strong hate for anything slimy."

You pouted.

"Then it doesn't need to be near Li and it'll be fine!"

You were determine to have this small slime be your companion during adventuring time. Forget seelies. Forget your boyfriends disapproval. Your going to keep it in the guest room and sleep with the squishy blue ball there.

Just as you were about to run away. Diluc grabbed you by the waist, carrying you over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes, making you drop your little companion. It bounces away, squeaking. You called out, hitting the red head's lower back, weakly with your fists.

"Hey! What was that for?!"

! SMACK !

Flinching, a swift slap was delivered to your bum and you didn't know who did it. Zhongli said.

"After we said no. You still take it in? Bad girl. I believe punishment must be ordered."

You blabbered in disbelief.

Suddenly, you were tossed onto the bed, sinking into the soft sheets of comfort, your clothes were ripped off by 2 pairs of greedy hands.

Perhaps you froze in shock when they toss away your scattered remains of clothing but they're already naked, their little friends exposed yet not awakened.

Zhongli hand gripped around your throat tightly, cutting off your air way. Meanwhile, your pyro lover ran his hot wet tongue over your folds, dampening your entrance. Tears gather at the corner of your eyes, feeling hazy at the lack of air yet hot. When Zhongli took away his coarse hand away from your throat, you desperately gasped for air. Without time to rest, the geo user pressed down on your hardened buds with his thumbs. You gave a breathy moan, stilling trying to catch the air you desperately needed in your lungs.

Diluc lapped at the slick you produced from your core, his nose rubbed against your clit making you shake every 5 seconds. Taking this as a distraction. The ravenette clipped your hard buds with some sort of unique silver nipple clamps.

It stung and Zhongli is not helping by tugging on them. You complained.

"I-It hurts!"

Nothing new. They whispered comforting words but you couldn't hear them cause of the erratic beating of your heart through your ears.

Something hot entered your entrance so you looked down and saw it was Diluc's digits thrusting in and out, occasionally rubbing a weird spot that made you moan out loud. Any attempts to close your legs, resulted in your smooth legs bended over your head and harsh spankings. Diluc reprimanded.

"Bad slut."

! SMACK !

! SMACK !

! SMACK !

Losing counts of how many time the pyro user landed a hit on each of your ass cheeks. Tears ran down your face like a waterfall, feeling the burn on your poor bottom. The nerve when Diluc rubbed them, hoping to soothe the pain. Well it ain't working. Bet it's all red now but it'll be bruised tomorrow.

Out of habit you bound your thighs together. However, your archon lover decided to tie your ankles and wrist to the corners of the bed.

Your head was turned to the side facing a big angry weeping member pressing against your lips.

"Open your mouth and take it all in like the pretty whore you are. You wanted us to punish you in the first place. That's why you disobeyed."

You gaped, screaming in your mind.

'ILLOGICAL! WE DID THIS JUST YESTERDAY."

Zhongli took the opportunity of your slightly opened mouth and slammed his member down your throat. You gagged, quickly trying to adjust to the large accompany in your mouth.

Man, they really manhandling you today. The ruby eyed male also plunges his length into your entrance, slowly pulling it out to the tip then pushing the rest in. You mewled in etascy. In sync, they fucked you at a rough pace. Just as you were about to release, they slowed down. You softly whine, tugging your hands, weakly at the restraints.

"Would you look at that. Our pretty whore wants to cum. Does she deserve it, mister Diluc?"

With a expression of annoyance, the red head rejected.

"No."

They continued the torture; fucking you at a relentless pace and when your about to reach your high, they slow down before repeating the process.

You cried, miserably. Their teasing was just endless. Letting them do whatever to your body, you felt your eyes roll up. The pyro user, chuckles.

"How cute. We fucked her brains out. She took her punishment so well. She deserves a reward, no?"

Zhongli takes off the toys pinching your swelling nipples, agreeing with the other male.

"Yes, even a bitch needs to cum at some point. Let her cum all she wants."

You didn't register the fact they pulled out their lengths, already taking off the restraints when they turn you over onto your stomach, doggy style. Their members slid back into you no problem. It was like your holes was made for them or they fucked you so much, your body's insides molded to their dick shape.

You moaned over and over again, cumming for who knows how many times. You were conscious however your mind was somewhere else.

Since they took away your walking privileges for the next 2 weeks, you get to keep the slime. Haha in your face geo daddy.

You named the small of hydro element, Puppy cause why not?

--------------

Again sorry for the wait! I'm trying to manage my schedule to scoot in a writing here and there since I also have Wattpad to deal with.

This one took a while but I am very excited for the next nsfw/crack request coming up and hope to achieve big brain for it.

[coquelicoq]

kurosawa after two (2) platonic sleepovers: i gotta focus, i'm shifting into domestic bliss mode

cherry magic x text posts, part 2

[Image description: 10 stills from the Japanese drama "Cherry Magic" with tumblr text posts edited in. Each still has an IrozukuSubs watermark in the top right corner.

Image 1: A still from Kurosawa's sweet life fantasy in episode 6. He and Adachi are standing in soft lighting in front of Adachi's window, smiling at each other as their hands meet while doing the laundry. The text post is by tumblr user lipglosse and reads "U ever look at someone and just imagine how in love with them u could be"

Image 2: A shot from below of Adachi leaning over with his arms braced on his desk, staring at the floor, in episode 7. The text post is by tumblr user racheldotgov-deactivated2016123 and reads "i personally love to over analyze everything and suffer"

Image 3: A still from episode 4 of Kurosawa catching the wrist of someone trying to punch Adachi in the face. Kurosawa is facing the camera and is holding Adachi to the side with his other arm. The text post is by dateaboysuggestion and reads "date a boy who is protective and supports you in all ways."

Image 4: A still from the special Rokkaku episode of Rokkaku grinning adoringly at Adachi (who is offscreen) with his hands clasped together right below his face. The text post is by sillyzone and reads "My last brain cell is heart shaped"

Image 5: A still from episode 2 of Kurosawa straightening Adachi's tie. The text post is by 1617 and reads "'can u multitask' yes actually i am losing my mind and chilling at the same time"

Image 6: A still from Kurosawa's fantasy of Adachi in pajamas in episode 2. Fantasy Adachi is looking into the camera with damp hair in his eyes and a towel around his neck and is backlit in blue light. The text post is by zmije and reads "whats a little homoerotic telepathy between friends"

Image 7: A still of Kurosawa from later in episode 2, sitting in his bedroom with his brow furrowed as he despairs over how adorable Adachi's sleeping face is. The text post is by florelgreen and reads "you’re really cute and its ruining my life because i think about kissing you all the time"

Image 8: A still from episode 6 of Kurosawa holding out a spoon and a bowl of porridge to Adachi. The text post is by timmynookremade-blog-deactivate and reads "irl im very shy and timid. im like a small animal. approach me calmly with a snack"

Image 9: A shot of Kurosawa holding Adachi in a bridal carry after Adachi faints. They're looking into each other's eyes. The shot is angled so that Adachi is in focus and is facing the camera. The text post is by r2-dj and reads "babygirl i’m deficient in vitamins scientists haven’t even discovered yet"

Image 10: A still from episode 6 when Kurosawa has tripped and fallen on top of Adachi in Adachi's bed. His hands are braced on the bed on either side of Adachi's head, and Adachi is staring up at him with wide eyes. The text post, which is centered above Kurosawa's butt, is by tumblr user daftpvnk-deactivated20131109 and reads "not now boner"

/end ID]

continued in cherry magic characters as

[stuff-from-the-void-matron]

Laurel Wreaths & Animal Teeth (7)

(c!Technoblade x fem!Reader)

(I know y’all are getting tired of waiting for Techno to arrive, so am I! But I have no solid control over the story plot lol but I swear it’ll happen soon!! And y’all know the drill! Reblogs and comments keep this story going. So if you want a chapter 8 then please show this chapter some love! <3)

---------------

(FORGOT TO MENTION ART!

The amazing 'YeetUsFeTUSDelETusss' on DA was so cool and drew two pictures to bless our eyes!!)

READER HERSELF!

READER PROTECTING HER BOYS!

--------------

Only Tubbo showed up the next day, and he said he sadly couldn’t stay for long because him and Tommy were needed back at L’manburg for a while. Meaning him and Tommy wouldn’t be able to visit for a bit, but they’d try to visit as soon as possible! Hearing they’d not come see you for who knows how long made you pretty sad. You honestly looked forward to when they’d visit. It was honestly the highlight of your day. But you knew whatever nonsense was going on in L’manburg currently would need their attention. Though you wondered what exactly was going on. You recalled a decent amount of the ‘history’ of the Dream SMP but you knew you could be misremembering or even mixing things up. But you did remember the big things that happened. Like the wars and stuff. So needless to say you were concerned.

‘What point in history am I in right now? Whenever it is, L’manburg is apparently still standing,’ you thought pensively before asking Tubbo what was going on that they’d need to stay in L’manburg.

Tubbo sighed and said it was ‘just some drama’ but apparently their, meaning his and Tommy’s, older brother figure Wilbur had been president of L’manburg for the entirety of the time L’manburg had existed. But some new citizens who joined them found out he’d not been properly elected and didn’t think it was fair to everyone that Wilbur had basically just made himself president without any input from everyone else. Which you could see was not right but this information told you that you were in the pre-election time. Which meant Schlatt and Quackity hadn’t won yet… But that hinged on this universe even being the same one that you’d watched on youtube. Things could be different here for all you knew. You’d always believed in the multiverse theory so who was to know WHICH universe this was. Or how you even got here. All you could do really was to just… wait and watch.

A couple hours passed during the short visit and towards the end Tubbo showed you how to message others, ie; him and Tommy mostly. You’d known how to message others and put in commands and stuff in regular minecraft but you’d just sort of never thought to try those things here in this place. Though to be fair you’d been dealing with a lot of stuff so fiddling with your inventory and everything hadn’t been your top priority. And when he’d mentioned messaging him your first thought had been ‘how?’, because this was a ‘real life’ minecraft, where things were very similar but not always exactly like how it was in the real game. The biggest difference being that there was no computer keyboard or ‘screen’ for the type/chat option to be at the bottom of like in the game.

But to your surprise the place to type in a message was actually IN your inventory. More specifically it was at the very bottom of the main section right below where your items were stored in the hot bar. You’d never paid the long ultra thin box at the bottom any mind, assuming it was just part of the weird design. But no, Tubbo showed you with his inventory how if you tap on the thin box (that you’d honestly thought was just a line) it expands into a typing window! Your eyes widened at that and watched as he tapped the typing box again and a little keyboard appeared below the typing box and he started typing something into it. You squinted and he said to message someone you needed to be sure to type ‘/msg’ and then whoever’s name you’d like to send the message to!

He demonstrated this by typing out the first part then right after it typing your ‘name’; aka Reader. Briefly you wondered why it had been made that but you brushed that thought away to focus on what Tubbo was doing. You saw him type ‘hi reader!!’ before hitting Enter. Then a second later you heard a soft ‘ping!’ sound and you just KNEW your inventory was waiting to be pulled up. Like knew in an instinctual sense. Like how you knew to blink or how to walk. Just an instinct you couldn’t explain so you brought it up and there at the bottom the ‘line’ was flashing a pale red. So you did what Tubbo had done and tapped it, revealing the little typing box. Only this time it had a message in it! It said, ‘Tubbo whispers to you: hi reader!!’ and you smile. Excited now you type out a message to him and hit send. He got it and laughed after he read it. 

‘Reader whispered to you: hello my little goat boy!! :)’

After that he blinked when more messages popped onto his text box. These were from Tommy and Wilbur it looked like. With a sigh he checked his clock and dismissed his chat box before saying he was sorry but he had to get going. He’d actually stayed longer than he was supposed to. You were sad to see him go but knew he’d be back, and hey, now you could message him and Tommy to make sure they got back to L’manburg safe instead of just wondering like before. So you told him to be careful on his way back and to message you that he was safe home when he arrived, and also if he needed any help. He laughed and cheekily said he would but gave a shy smile when you pulled him into a hug and gently knocked your antlers with his horns, but he happily returned it. Not so secretly enjoying the affection. But he had to pull back and leave.

That left you to your own devices.

-0-

With nothing better to do you initially spent the next three days building a couple fountains in the village (which was getting pretty big..). One tiny frog shaped one in the little grotto at the west side of the village and a much larger more traditional one in the opposite side of the village. You’d even set up park benches, flower plots, lamp posts, and stone sidewalk around the bigger one. It was very pretty and the villagers seemed to be enjoying it. But after that was done you’d sorta gotten bored. You weren’t really inspired to do anything else to the village so you thought of ways to occupy yourself. Eventually a metaphorical lightbulb flickered to life above your head and you got an idea. 

You could go to the Nether! 

Sure you weren’t the biggest fan of the place but it beat sitting around twiddling your thumbs waiting for a reply from your only two friends like some loser. And hey, you liked giving piglins gold. They made cute little piggy snorts when they were happy. So with that loose plan in mind you got up from where you’d been lounging by the creek and brushed yourself off before heading out to the place outside the bamboo and prickle berry wall you’d placed the first Nether portal. You crafted one real quick before tensing up when you heard the sound of rustling behind you. Assuming it was a creeper or something you glanced back, not that it would hurt you but you still found it unsettling for anything to be sneaking up behind you. You caught a brief glimpse of something small and white disappearing into a cluster of ferns. You paused, wondering what it was but then about a block to the left of the ferns a chicken and her chick walked out from around a tree. ‘Oh, must have just been a baby chicken’, you thought with a mental shrug before turning back to your task of lighting the portal with your flint and steel.

Once activated you stepped into the purple swirling mist and your vision warped before you ended up in the Nether again, stifling heat and all. 

-0-

You’d been exploring the Nether for what felt like hours. The place was goddamn enormous! You’d followed the same sand block trail from the last time you’d been here, seeing the piglins and a few striders along the way. And to your delight a familiar little piglin baby started following you. She (you think she’s a ‘she’, that’s the vibe you’re getting anyways) had to be the one you’d played with the last time you’d been in the Nether. You crouched down and patted her head and pulled a golden carrot from your inventory before gifting it to her. She squealed happily and munched on it. You kept walking along the sand path before reaching the fortress. That’s when you diverted your path to the right and started exploring that way, careful to keep laying down sand as you did. You thought the baby piglin had stayed back but after a while of walking you heard a soft snort and glanced down to the left of you to see her happily trotting along with you, still nibbling on the golden carrot.

You wanted to melt, she was such a cutie pie. You stopped and asked if she should be travelling so far away. Won’t her parents miss her? She blinks and seems to understand you before shaking her head ‘no’. You figure she must have some pretty lenient parents. But you suppose piglins are sturdier than humans so it makes sense they’d keep their kids on a looser leash than humans would. So you ask her where her parents are and if they’d be okay with her wandering off with you, a stranger. She tilts her head and shrugs. You purse your lips and ask if she can take you to her parents so you can ask if they’d be okay with it. This time she shakes his head no. So you ask her why and she seems to be thinking how to answer before she goes over to the closest block of sand and starts drawing in it. You look over her shoulder and see her drawing three hearts. Then your stomach sinks when you see her draw an ‘X’ over each heart, meaning one thing..

“Oh sweetie, did your parents lose all their lives?” you ask in a gentle tone.

The tiny piglin nodded and your heart broke for her. You asked some more questions and discovered she wasn’t really being taken care of by any one piglin. The other piglins knew her parents were gone so they’d sorta chip in to make sure she had food. But that was really it. This made you feel worse so you just sighed and patted her head and said she could join you while you explored the Nether. She snorted happily and you two continued on your way. Eventually after walking for a bit you came across a warped forest. You had to admit the biome was much prettier in person. The stark contrast between the Nether’s usual red color scheme and the teal of the warped forest was really beautiful. Even the weird little green/orange fungus that were growing everywhere were cute. You even picked a handful to keep, placing them in your inventory before continuing your little jaunt with the baby piglin. 

That last thought made you mentally pause and realize that you couldn’t just keep calling this kid ‘baby piglin’. So you stopped walking and looked down before saying you forgot to introduce yourself. She could call you Reader (since that’s what your little name thing said..). Then you asked what her name was. She blinked before snorting a little, like she was clearing her throat, and said, “Azogamay.” 

You smiled and said you liked her name, making her give a cute little tusked smile. Then as you continued exploring you both made small talk. Nothing deep (how deep could conversation get with a little kid) but you asked each other the usual questions. Like favorite foods, favorite colors, favorite animals, etc. Then Azo (you’d taken to shortening her name to make it easier) answered one of your questions with some gibberish that made you pause. You glanced down at her and gave a ‘huh?’ that made her giggle before apparently remembering you weren’t a piglin. She said she forgot and spoke Piglin. That made you raise your eyebrows because you’d never thought about other species in the game having their own language. But now that you were thinking about it, it totally made sense. Of course they would, duh. Now very curious you asked her to teach you a little! Like did she know how your name would be said in Piglin? Her answer surprised you…

“Eaderray!” she said in her quiet baby voice.

Now you two had entered a wide soul sand valley, which made Azo anxious. She hid behind your leg, making you recall that Piglins didn’t really spawn in this biome or like soul fire (which is super common here). You had to admit the place was rather creepy. It didn’t help that the soul sand beneath your feet was emitting a rather creepy whispery wail. So you decided to turn back and try another direction. Azo seemed relieved and trotted along behind you. But once you were walking again you remembered your last thought and had a vague feeling about this ‘piglin speak’ and wanted to hear more. So you asked Azo some other words, just to test this theory of yours. And well…

Skeleton? Eletonskay…

Blaze? Azeblay…

Strider? Iderstray…

Lava? Avalay...

Gold? ...Oldgay (that may have made you snicker).

But you got the idea and honestly you cannot be held accountable for your reaction after you realized Piglins honest to fucking god spoke PIG LATIN.

You lost it. You laughed so hard you doubled over and had to brace your hands on your knees to keep from collapsing onto the ground. Azo didn’t know what was so funny but your laughter was contagious and she ended up laughing too, intermixed with little snorts that made you laugh even harder. It was a whole cycle. And by the end of it you’d laughed so hard you started coughing and had to sit down to catch your breath. The giggles returned a couple times but eventually you got control over yourself enough to be able to breathe normally again. As you sat there, little Azo looking up at you in amusement, you couldn’t believe the absolute batshit nonsense that was happening in your life right now. But out of everything that had happened, you think finding out Piglins spoke pig latin had to be the funniest. Though you wanted to test your theory further so you said to Azo,

“Ellohay Azogamay, isyay isthay ightray?”

Azo’s eyes brightened and she perked up, looking close to bouncing from excitement as she realized you were speaking ‘Piglin’ to her. She started babbling at the speed of light, in a way that all excited toddlers seemed to be able to do. While it was cute enough to pull a chuckle from you the downside was that you could not understand a single word Azo said. You got her to slow down, telling her you didn’t speak Piglin fluently so she would have to go slow with you otherwise you’d be lost. She nodded, just happy that you could understand Piglin. So she slowed down a lot and chatted with you that way. And that’s pretty much how the rest of your time in the Nether went. You traversed through the hellish dimension and brushed up on your pig latin with the little piglin. 

It has definitely been a LONG time since you’d even thought about the made up ‘language’. You’d had a friend in elementary school who had been Obsessed with it. It was all they spoke sometimes and they’d talked it up so much that it caught on with the rest of the class, yourself included, and soon everyone was using it to write notes to each other, like a secret language. You’d even speak to each other only in pig latin during recess and lunch breaks. You’d been fluent in it and didn’t even have to think before speaking. Though after a year it had lost its popularity and everyone slowly stopped using it since the fad was over. But you still remembered a good deal of it. Enough to speak it slowly anyways. But the more you used it the easier it was to speak it. It was like riding a bike you supposed, you never truly forgot it.

-0-

Things were going fine until they weren’t. You’d stopped to have lunch in a crimson forest, more for Azo’s benefit than your own, and were sitting and eating for a while before Azo started playing with a baby hoglin. Which had been fine, you’d seen baby piglins and hoglins do that in the game before, no biggie. But they’d gotten rambunctious the way kids do when they’re playing together. And while chasing each other around Azo had smacked into one of the adult hoglins, which had pissed it off enough for it to snarl angrily and start chasing Azo. And Azo in turn began squealing in fear while running away. You’d dropped the steak you’d been idly munching on and sprinted after the two. Sadly the hoglin was closer to Azo than you and managed to get one good hit in with its tusks, the force behind it practically yeeting Azo up into the air. You yelled in horror as you watched the baby piglin fall down into a lava filled ravine. 

Panic flooded your body, you knew zombie piglins were fireproof but regular piglins were not as far as you knew. Let alone baby piglins who just took a direct hit from a damn hoglin. So without thinking about it you dove into the ravine after Azo, catching her in your arms and fully planning to hold her up above the lava since it wouldn’t hurt you. Once she was in your arms you jerked back instinctively, not sure why, just maybe bracing for the impact with the lava. You waited but… nothing. About that second you realized that you weren’t moving anymore. You’d come to a halt and at first you wondered if maybe you’d landed on a block and not noticed. But… one glance down revealed you were not in fact standing on a block. Actually you weren’t standing on anything. You were hovering about 3 or 4 blocks above the bubbling lava at the bottom of the ravine. You were so stunned that you almost missed the sniffling snorts that started up next to your face but thankfully they broke you out of your shocked state. You looked at Azo and your heart broke when you saw her tearing up and looking close to crying. Forgetting momentarily about whatever the fuck was going on with you floating you focused on soothing her.

“Aw sweetie, are you okay? You took a hit from that hoglin, where does it hurt?” you cooed.

She was babbling mostly, being too upset to try to speak English. And understanding crying pig latin was almost impossible. So you just asked her to point where it hurt. She reached for her back and side and you softly told her you were going to lift her shirt a little bit to see if there was a mark, and she nodded shakily and sniffled while you did. You winced at the blooming bruise and adjusted her so you were basically cradling her and with your free hand you opened your inventory and started looking through the potions. You grabbed a healing potion and uncorked it before offering it to Azo, whose snout wrinkled at the potion. You told her it was alright, it was a healing potion that would make her feel better and get rid of those bruises for her. She looked unsure but still let you raise the mouth of the potion bottle to her lips so she could sip it. She took a few sips before hiccuping, potion swirls wafting off of her after she did. The baby piglin blinked and felt the pain in her back and side start to disappear. 

You smiled and said that must feel better, Azo nodded and was happy she wasn’t hurting anymore. You let her take one more sip for good measure before putting the cork back into the bottle and stashing it in your inventory. But once that was done you were reminded of your current predicament. You were still floating in place above a ravine of lava.. With zero clue on how to move too. Briefly you internally panicked at the thought of just.. never being able to move again!! Being stuck fixed in one spot forever with no way to get down or live freely! Though before you could panic further you took a deep breath and told yourself to relax. This wasn’t permanent, it couldn’t be. There logically has to be a way for you to move. You got yourself stuck here and you’ll get yourself down as well.

And the last thing you wanted was to look scared with Azo here with you. She was just a little kid and needed the only adult around to be strong for her. So you put on a smile and reassured her that things will be okay and you’ll figure out how to get them both safe on land in no time. Azo nodded, looking less worried than before. So you started trying things you think would get you to move. You could move your limbs no problem. Proven by how you could move Azo around with your arms and kick your legs about without issue. But your body as a whole was still locked in place. Though when you leaned your upper body to the left you hit a breakthrough! Tilting your torso to the left managed to move your whole body to the left by about a block and a half! Now onto the right path you started leaning your torso this way and that, figuring out what movements actually got you moving and which ones didn’t. Figuring out how to move side to side and forwards and back was pretty easy. But it was figuring out up and down that was tricky. 

At the moment going down was the last thing you were interested in, what with the lava beneath you. So you tried focusing on going up, and after a lot more wiggling about that you were sure made you look like an idiot to anyone who could be watching (Azo only giggled a little) you finally figured out that to go up you had to tense and stretch your torso a specific way. Like exactly how you would do if you were trying to reach something on the top shelf, only you didn’t have to move your arms or legs the same way, just your torso. Like how people straighten themselves to seem taller, not slouching at all. After getting that down you manage to go up and then over out of the ravine. Which was a relief and a half. Now that the threat of sinking into lava wasn’t a worry you instead fixated on getting down. Thanks to figuring out how to get up you had an easier time getting the hang of getting down.

Once your feet touched the ground the floating thing disappeared and gravity was restored to you, making you able to walk around normally again. You gave a small cheer, Azo snorting happily as you carried her back to your spot on one of the crimson mushroom tree tops. Once seated you let out a breath and felt your shoulders relax. You hadn’t even been aware they’d been so tense, but you guess it made sense what with how you just sorta had a weird physics related mishap. But now that you and little Azo were safe you felt like you could breathe again. 

You took a golden apple out of your inventory and took a bite, the sweet juice soothing your metaphorical ruffled feathers. You noticed you mostly just eat for the taste now. Which was fine you guessed. When you glanced down you held the apple close to Azo’s face, asking in semi-good piglin if she wanted a bite, chuckling when she eagerly sunk her little teeth into the sweet fruity flesh of it. You gave her the rest and just watched the other Nether inhabitants mill about peacefully. Today had been a wild ride for sure. At least compared to your usual peaceful days. You leaned back against the lump of red fungus behind you, Azo cradled in your arms, and sighed calmly. You’d been ready to rest your eyes when you heard a soft ‘ping!’ that had you blinking back into focus. It was your communicator app thing. Thinking it was just Tubbo messaging you to say goodnight or something you casually opened the message. But when you did you raised an eyebrow at the note from your kid.

‘Tubbo whispers to you: the election is tomorrow afternoon, can you come? 

‘Tubbo whispers to you: i’ve got a bad feeling.. i’m not trying to pull you into our mess’

‘Tubbo whispers to you: but idk i’d feel better if you were there.’

You had a bad feeling too… You hoped what you likely knew was going to happen DIDN’T happen but.. it probably was. So you sent back a quick reply to Tubbo.

‘You whisper to Tubbo: of course I will! you can show me around your home! :)

You tried to keep your reply upbeat and happy, not wanting to feed into the teenager’s worry. Even though you were probably more worried now that he was. But regardless.

It looked like you were visiting L’manburg.

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

The Thrilling Saga of Connie paying real life money for the Worst Sonic TV Show

Let’s begin with the simple fact that me and my sister, @birdsareblooming​ “Cori”, have both been hyperfixating on Sonic the Hedgehog since last March. During this hyperfixation, I was on Sonic Wiki to copy-paste song lyrics onto my stolen mp3s, and I called my sister in and pointed at the template at the bottom. 

“What is this Sonic Underground thing?” I asked. “It has one shit billion songs.” 

So we clicked on the page to read about it, and each sentence we read was a punch in the gut and this quickly became the funniest thing we’d ever read. Highlights include:

It looks like this:

“Sonic[...] is known to be a prince” 

Sonic has two siblings who actually have good characterization but their names are literally just Sonia and Manic. Like. Sonic split into two names. jesus christ 

Also Sonic and his siblings all share a voice actor. honestly Jaleel White does his best with it but 

“The three siblings possess enchanted medallions that transform not only into musical instruments, but also into weapons.”

“Some fans consider Sonia to be a clone of Amy Rose, minus the attraction Amy feels for Sonic.” YEAH I SURE HOPE IT DOES

“Manic is the most often captured of the siblings” himbo king 

Knuckles shows up, and for the first, like, two sentences his description is very similar to the game, and then you get immediately pulverized by “He has a pet Dinosaur called Chomps.”

Literally so many sentences on Sonic Wiki are lowkey salty about this show. The page features lines such as “Sonic Underground bears little relation to the often complex Sonic universe (including previous animated series, as well as Sonic comics and games), and shares only three established characters” and “many of the characters in the Freedom Fighter group that were in Sonic the Hedgehog are completely left out (including Tails).”

“The show met with mostly negative reviews.”

*checks air dates* It only lasted two goddamn months

So after seeing this we thought it was the funniest thing and we showed our older sister, @patema-introverted​ “North.” To our surprise, our at the time “knew nothing about this sonic bullshit” sister recognized the show. Turns out she’d seen trailers for it as a child and that was her sole exposure to Sonic canon. 

We were in quarantine at the time, so we ended up finding it on YouTube and binge-watching it all together as a sibling bonding activity. It was just as hilarious as we thought it would be- some stuff was legitimately good, like the sibling dialogue for instance, but good lord were the character designs ugly, the plot all over the place, and pretty much every song, um, not great. Also there was one episode that we skipped because it got, um, I think “stereotypical” is the nicest word I can use here. 

But the point is, we had a jolly good time watching it, and afterwards we binged all the other Sonic shows and bonded as a family. 

After quarantine, North and I go back to college. My roommate gets groceries at Walmart, while I get them elsewhere, so while she and North collect food I wander the DVD aisle to look at the cool movies and also dumpster-dive in the bargain bin for Cats (2019). I am also short as fuck, so the top shelf of movies I cannot see, I can only read the labels. 

So one day I was browsing the DVDs, and glancing over at the labels for the top shelf. I read over the final one before the shelves end. 

And then I stop, do a double take, and have a heart attack, because there is a label that reads “SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74″

I immediately climb the shelf but there aren’t any DVDs atop the shelf. However, the label is still there. I excitedly tell my sister and roommates, freak out with them a bit, and then give myself a mission statement:

I will buy the $4 Sonic Underground DVD from Walmart

I did not want it as a gift, I did not want to find it online. I wanted to walk into a store, pick up the Worst Sonic Show on DVD, walk it straight to the checkout, and in front of the cashier and God, pay for it with my own money. I did not care if it was the whole series or two episodes; I needed to do this for my own serotonin.

We would go to Walmart about once a week. Every time, I would go to the DVD aisle, and go right to the end of the shelves. I would stare at the label SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74 and empty space above it and wonder who the fuck was buying this other than me. I would occasionally ask employees if they had any copies in storage. I would build a shrine to Manic in my room. Okay, no I didn’t, but only because my RA would have murdered me. 

Christmas break comes, and we have to go home. We have a nice Christmas, and Cori and I infodump at each other about how we would make Sonic Underground a good show (note: we’re both galaxy braining) and also play Bendy and the Ink Machine. Fun times. 

When we finally get back to College, it’s late January- long story short we have a very long winter break. My roommate who gets food at Walmart got food without us the first week cause she showed up first, so we take her out to Walmart the first time in the year of our lord 2021 on January 29. 

I wander the Valentine’s aisle, immediately grabbing a sequin puppy. I go to the DVDs and see Animaniacs Season One, also grab that. 

And then.

There it is.

The Holy Grail. 

Above the label SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74, is one DVD left. 

Already I am losing my mind. It’s roughly seven hours of episodes- I couldn’t find an episode list, but I think that’s half the show, for $4! And the cover is amazing. 

That’s a png of Sonic from Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993) with a medallion badly photoshopped over it. The medallion is too small. 

Manic is shoved into the corner. He doesn’t have his medallion at all. 

Sonia isn’t even pictured on the front cover, probably because they realized she was the worst designed of the bunch. I’m not ragging on her though, because she’s still one of the better designed characters of the show. Those background characters make me cry 

So you bet your ass I finally paid my hard-earned $4 for this shit. Upon getting home, I discovered that there was even wilder shit with this DVD than I thought. 

For starters: the bonus features listed are as follows:

Original Concept Art - did not expect that these character designs were the final draft

Storyboard-to-screen - did not expect they bothered to storyboard this 

Music Video Jukebox - that’s cute, they thought we liked the music 

Interviews with original screenwriter & executive producer - I fully expect the only questions to be “why.” 

On the left of this list are screenshots from the show, where people can finally see Sonia, who we Know™ is a girl because she is pink and has hair and also an actual body shape instead of just circles like her brothers. 

But wait... what’s that in the lefthand corner? 

That looks like some kind of robot. But it’s not a robot from Sonic Underground! That didn’t appear once. Why is it here? 

The mystery continues upon opening the DVD case: inside are advertisements for other collections, including other Sonic DVDs: two volumes of Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993) and the final episodes of Sonic the Hedgehog “SatAM” (1993)

First of all, the first volume of AOSTH has the exact same PNG of Sonic as the Underground Volume 1. Not even trying to hide it. But second... the second volume of AOSTH also has this robot on its cover. 

And THIS ROBOT IS ALSO DECORATING THE THIRD DISC IN THE SET?

So you may be asking, who is this robot? Is it from AOSTH or Underground?

IT’S FROM FUCKING SATAM. The one show that doesn’t have it decorating the DVD covers.

Also, not only is it from SatAM, it only appears in one fucking episode. Not a major character! AND IT HAS A DIFFERENT DESIGN ON THE PROMO ART, WITH HAIR AND FANGS.

Why is it showing up everywhere? What is going on? 

I have not yet had the opportunity to watch this glorious piece of animation, but I am so glad at the confusion I have felt upon receiving it. 

But before I go, I must share with you the best part of this DVD purchase. And it was flipping to the back, scanning the details, and discovering the exact runtime of the episode collection. 

Guys, gals, and enby pals, friends and enemies, Nintendo and Sega, the first Volume of Sonic Underground has a runtime of...

420 MINUTES.

Maybe I’m wrong and this IS the best Sonic show. 

[witchthewriter]

hello, so i'm here to take part in the open ships. My personasility is that of an introvert, where i prefer to be by myself instead of around others although when i'm with my friends, i can be a little bit of a chaotic mess and am usually full of so many dirty jokes its unhealthy. my sexuality is bisexual and some of my hobbies include reading, drawing(although I'm not very good) and baking. the three fandoms i would like to have this done for are peaky blinders, stranger things and harry potter

Want one? Here be the rules 🦋

Thank you for participating my love!

What each ship has in common:

⋆ Open-minded ⋆ Quirky ⋆ Loyal ⋆ Free-spirited ⋆ Introverted

𝐏𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐲 𝐁𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬

𝐷𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛

I ship you with Esme! I think you would fit well since you said you prefer to be alone rather than with people. Esme’s culture is very similar; they like to seclude themselves from the outside world. 

𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠

・You would be an odd couple, but that isn’t in a rude way at all, you’re just not the stereotypical couple. 

・Sometimes people would listen to your conversations and literally not understand, not because you’re speaking a different language, but because you don’t always need to talk to understand each other.

・You believe she knows about the supernatural and paranormal. You might be interested in learning it as well (???) 

・Deep talks, hand holding; oh my god, I so see you guys rubbing noses or pressing your foreheads together. So cuTE

・Feeling safe enough to talk about your opinions and how you feel. During these times it was unsafe to be so outspoken and opinionated, but Esme ALWAYS makes you feel safe.

𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

𝐷𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛

I ship you with Jonathan Byers! I think you guys would connect over your sensitive sides. Jonathan isn’t like the average teenage boy, who is emotionally stunted and doesn’t care about anyone but themself. He actually thinks about others, he’s responsible and always puts Will first. You appreciate that. 

𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠

・You guys would see eye to eye. Both preferring to spend time in each other’s rooms, than the outside world. I mean if you do go outside, it’s usually in a secluded area. 

・Will feeling super safe with you. He tells you about his life, about the upside down and everything before, after and in between. You feel honoured to be involved even though Jonathan doesn’t want you near Hawkins. 

・I think you would like staying at the Byers’ house. It’s quiet, everything is tidy and there’s a good vibe. I can totally see an old record playing while Will draws, Jonathan reads and you drifting off to sleep. 

・Joyce really likes you and thinks you’re great for her son

・You would sleep on Jonathan’s chest, listening to his heartbeat while playing with his hands. It’s really tender.

𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐏𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫

𝐷𝑒𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑖𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛

I ship you with Luna Lovegood! She’s creativee, open-minded, and eccentric. I think you have similar qualities but are more down to earth. Luna would definitely brighten up your life without causing chaos. 

𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠

・You always make sure to find any lost objects, help her when she forgets appointments etc,. I think she would lose her head if it wasn’t attached to her neck. 

・Both love to sit and read next to each other. No need for talking, no need to be anywhere else. It’s knowing that you enjoy each other’s company that makes this relationship work.

・I think you guys would be absolute best friends before anything romantic would occur. 

・After you’ve been together for a while, you would move in with each other. In a weirdly shaped cottage that is magically infused. 

“Luna, I don’t think this will work. Structurally I mean...” 

    “Don’t worry Darling,” she said in her usual dreamy voice, “Magic will fix it.” 

・Your lifestyle is like one big sleepover - randomly doing each others nails, braiding one another’s hair, face masks, massages, giggling. 

・You invite Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville and Ginny over whenever. You feel good with them; although your social battery does drain. Luna understands that and will come up with excuses when she realises that you want to leave/want them to leave. 

[willowbleedsonpaper]

Winter In The Shade II

Part II

Sirius Black x Ravenclaw Reader

W.C. : 2591

Requested by @amourtentiaa : It is Sirius' fifth year at Hogwarts, the same year he ran away from home and to the Potter's. Soon, he discovers the unfamiliar sight of his brother Regulus smiling and looking truly happy, next to him a Ravenclaw girl who immediately captures his interest. What will happen when the Black family gets involved in their sons lives and the ones they hold close to their hearts?

Warnings: Mentions of food. / Slight panic. /

Add yourself to the Taglist!

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Sirius Black didn’t obsess over things. He just didn’t. It wasn’t in him to have something on his mind for more than necessary. He worried, yes, but this was different. There was nothing to worry about, unless he considered the rare sight of his brother smiling something to worry about. If anything he shouldn’t be worried but happy for him. No he wasn’t worried. He was...curious. Who was the girl who managed to make his brother smile?

“Stop it.” Remus grunted, snapping his fingers in front of Sirius to get his attention.

Sirius only glared at his friend as he made him jump in his seat, the cup of tea he held in his hand now all over his sweater. “Really?” Sirius hissed as he placed his cup back on the table “I’m not doing anything.” he defended himself.

Remus rolled his eyes “The fact that you are putting excuses out means you are.” he said matter of factly, shutting Sirius as the rest of his friends laughed.

James and Peter found this entire situation incredibly entertaining. Not only because Sirius had been paranoid since he saw his brother with that Ravenclaw girl, but because Remus thought it was creepy that Sirius was so invested in finding who the girl was, and that turned every interaction between Remus and Sirius into fights.

“Just go and ask whatever it is you want to know!” Remus said desperately.

“And have him see me?” Sirius hissed, pointing his fork in Regulus’ direction “Over. my. dead. body.”

Remus groaned loudly, muttering under his breath as he started to angrily stab his breakfast.

Sirius ignored him and turned back to the Ravenclaw table, his back straightening as his eyes scanned the entire Great Hall. Only the low chuckles from Peter pulling his attention back to his friends.

“She left.” James laughed “But you know Moony’s right. You need to do something about it.”

Sirius scoffed but said nothing as he held his head on his hands.

“How long has it been since you saw them? Two weeks?”

“Three.” Sirius muttered bitterly.

“Oh, you’re counting them.” Remus snorted, shaking his head.

Sirius turned sharply, pushing Remus’ head and almost getting it all over his plate “Shut up, Moony.” he said, turning back to James “And you’re one to talk, how’s Lily?” he mocked, making James smile sardonically at him.

“That’s different. At least I am doing something about it. You’re just staring. Speaking of…” James said, his eyes drifting from the table as he took his things in his hands, getting up from the table “Evans!” he didn’t say another thing, leaving the table before anyone could say anything.

“You could always talk to her.” offered Peter, making Remus and Sirius turn to him.

“I got that Peter, but she’s always with him.” Sirius said, referring to Regulus “It’s like trying to find a fish out of the water.” he sighed.

“Have you tried late at night?” Peter asked, getting questioning looks from both of his friends “I’ve heard she takes late night walks outside the castle, rarely gets caught so she won’t be easy to find but, you know, she’s all alone.”

“How do you know that?” asked Remus with wide eyes.

Peter just shrugged his shoulders as he went back to his breakfast “Rats talk.”

*******

The ceiling of your bed had started to lose shape as you stared at it, your eyes blurry as you blinked several times to clear up your sight with no luck. With a heavy sigh you turned on your side, letting out a soft groan as you read the clock on the wall across from you: 03:00 am.

You weren’t getting much sleep that night.

Careful not to wake any of your roommates, you rolled out of bed and grabbed the closest sweater you had, wrapping it over your shoulders. You made silent work on the heavy door to your dorm, walking down the stairs as you came across a few other sleepless Ravenclaws. You smiled mostly to yourself as you got to the massive library in the common room, a big group of first years sitting on the floor with books surrounding them in every direction, the sleep in their eyes known to you and every other student.

“Hi Y/N.” said one of the boys nearest to you, giving you a sleepy smile.

“Hey Félix.” you said to him, coming to kneel beside them as they all turned their attention to you “Shouldn’t you all be in bed?” you asked.

“You’re up too.” Saide, one of the girls said, and you chuckled “Why aren’t you sleeping?” she asked with amusement.

“I sensed a bunch of first years up and had to come down and see I wasn’t missing on all the fun.” you told them, scrunching your nose in a funny manner, making them all laugh.

Félix grabbed one of the biggest books in their selection, dropping it in front of you with a big thud “If you think Herbology is fun then feel free to join us, although we all know how good you are at that one.”

You made a face, sticking out your tongue as you practically crawled back “No, thank you.” you laughed humorlessly “You know I barely got out of that one myself, Sadie here had to help with my own homework.”

“True.” she confirmed, making all of them groan in defeat as they grabbed back their books.

You watched their tired eyes, all of them reading over and over the lines that still made no sense to your own brain “I’ll tell you this,” you said, capturing their attention “Since I know you won’t go to bed even if I tell you to, I’ll go down to the kitchens and grab you all some food so you can keep studying.”

They all cheered in whispers, whether it was because it was the middle of the night or due to their tired selves, you almost pouted at how cute they were and how much they reminded you of yourself and your friends.

It took a couple of minutes for you to narrow down all the things they wanted to something you could actually carry with you in “Ravenclaws studying in the middle of the night” amounts. Confident with their choices they let you go, opening the door to the common room easily as a soft breeze flew around your face, making you take a deep breath as you stepped out and started to descend the stairs. It was a long walk down to the kitchens, and a dangerous one considering the hour. Luckily, you knew your way around the castle.

The corridors echoed with the inevitable sound of your movements, your footsteps carried a rhythm of its own as you tried to be quiet, taking what you considered graceful steps with a calm but steady pace. But sometimes you couldn’t help yourself and take a few skips on your step as the air flew around you, the sound of the owls making a melody that made you wish you could dance. You had to stifle the giggles that escaped your lips every time you caught yourself making more noise than necessary, never scared of getting caught but because it would be a little embarrassing to be seen doing so, especially in the middle of the night.

Most of all you wished Regulus was there with you. It was rare to see him out in the middle of the night, almost impossible that you found him at the same time as you were outside. You wanted to make memories at Hogwarts with him, to have stories to tell when you were older about the fun mess you two would do at dramatic times in the night. You wanted to sing his favorite songs, and have him teach you how to dance, laugh as you escaped the angry calls of Professor McGonagall and get detention together for the rest of your time at Hogwarts. You wanted to have fun with your best friend. But where was he? Probably not sleeping, you knew he got the same amount of sleep or less than you did. But he decided to be boring after dinner and head straight to the Slytherin common room.

Lovely, you thought to yourself as you realized you were outside the kitchens, the characteristic aroma of it reaching your nostrils. How could it be that it smelled so amazing at the three in the morning? “Magic.” you mumbled as you turned to check on your surroundings, confirming that no one had followed you.

Stepping inside you focused on the task at hand: Feeding sleep deprived first years. Pulling out your wand you conjured Lumos, the soft light enough to get you around. The elves were very organized, laying tray after tray of food on the counters as if they were expecting you. You just hoped they wouldn’t mind your late visit.

You turned in your place, looking for something you could use to carry more things, letting out a squeal of excitement when you saw a basket there, it had a few carrots inside, carrots that you placed away as you started to collect the much needed snacks. Freshly baked bread and cookies were the most requested items. “Alright, food for the brain...Oatmeal cookies.” you said, as you placed them inside the basket “Chocolate chip cookies” you sang, humming as you placed the entire tray inside “Weird looking cookies, I can give those to Félix since he sold me out with not being good at Herbology.”

You were so entranced with your task, placing the cookies and bread neatly inside the basket that the sudden noise in the kitchens made you jump in your place, making you drop one of the cookies as you turned sharply, your wand held high as you stared shakily into the darkness. “Who 's there?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper.

When no one answered you, you relaxed your arm, letting it fall at your side as you sighed heavily “This is why I need sleep.” you told no one, kneeling to the floor and picking up the cookie that you dropped “Maybe I won’t feed the weird looking cookies to Félix, then.” you mumbled, looking suspiciously at your surroundings before you picked up the basket and started your way back to the common room.

The small scare in the kitchens left you on edge. Blame the lack of sleep or the fact that you were all alone in an enormous castle that had actual ghosts, your previous urge to dance and run around the hallways was now replaced with a need to run from whatever you were imagining was behind your back.

“No one’s there. No one’s there. No one’s there.” you repeated time and time again, turning to look over your shoulder every time you thought you heard something. Were you finally losing your mind? You were certain you heard a chuckle.

Almost reaching the stairs for the Ravenclaw common room you were more relaxed, your tired mind barely registering your surroundings. Turning one last time to be safe no one had seen you, you turned only to be met by the firm yet soft feeling of someone else's chest.

You didn’t have time to register how loud was your scream when a pair of hands took hold of your shoulders, preventing you from falling as you clutched the basket against your own chest.

“Merlin.” you mumbled, your eyes scrunched shut as you realized there was an actual person before you, a silly smile forming on your lips only to fall once you opened up your eyes.

“Are you alright?” asked a familiar yet strange voice.

You swallowed hard, nodding your head as you took one careful step back “Yes, thank you.” you said, putting on a smile as you examined his face and looked for any badge in his chest. He wasn’t a prefect. You let out a sigh of relief and he furrowed his eyebrows.

“You really are hungry.” he said, his eyes falling to the basket in your hands “Are you eating all that by yourself?” he asked.

It took you a second to react, your eyes following his gaze before you let out a nervous chuckle “No, no- this isn’t, it’s not for me.” you explained, the raise of his eyebrow making you come up with an explanation without him even asking “First years are studying and need some fuel, I’m just taking care of them.” you said, lifting up the basket with a smile.

“Let me guess.” he said, his hand going inside the basket as he grabbed a cookie “Food for the brain?” he asked.

You found yourself nodding with a smile, a sudden realization striking you as you stared with wide eyes at the boy in front of you. Regulus told you studying snacks were food for the brain; it was an inside joke the two of you had, or at least you thought. With a shiver running down your spine you took a more careful look at the boy in front of you, the black hair and beautiful grey eyes, a smile so familiar flashing at you from the wrong face. Food for the brain.

“Regulus.” you murmured, capturing his attention.

“Sorry?” he said.

You shook your head, taking a step back before you said “Your Regulus’ brother.” you told him “Sirius.”

Sirius would have smirked and said some flirty comment back to you, but the look on your face told him it wasn’t the best idea.

Footsteps caught both your attention, making the two of you turn to the source of the sound before he took a hold of your arm, pulling you next to him and behind a pillar. There was little to no space between you, his chest heaving with his breathing brushing close against your arm as he held a finger to his lips, looking forward and over your head.

You couldn’t help but stare up at him, the resemblance he had to Regulus so scary it made you wonder how you never noticed before.

His eyes were glued to the hall, only moving back to you once the sound of footsteps was fading in the distance. “I think they’re gone, but try not to scream again.” he said, focusing back on you “How come you know my name but I don't know yours?” he asked, the flirtatious tone on his voice having no effect in you.

“You’re Regulus brother.” you repeated “Scarily similar.” you explained.

He ignored the last comment, erasing any hint of bitterness “Still, I didn't get your name.”

Your eyes danced between him and the stairs, taking a more secure hold of the basket in your hand you looked up to him “I have to go.” you said with a smile “Goodnight Sirius.”

Before he could react, you had walked around him, your arms brushing together as you ran up the stairs. He had reached his hand to take a hold of yours but gave up in the end, you clearly didn’t want to talk to him and that only made you more interesting. Regulus had clearly talked to you about him.

*******

You sat with Regulus after a long day of classes, the weekend finally there for you to spend together and relax. Except you couldn’t. One thought still bugging you after days of the events.

“Hey, Reg?” you called, looking back to where he sat on the grass.

He hummed.

“Can you tell me about your brother, Sirius?”

TAGS

Skittles

@iwritesiriusly / @trinimalfoyyy / @megaprincesscakes / @lunalovegoodsgirlfriend

Marauders

@destourtereaux

Winter In The Shade

@plethoraofpuppies / @dracoissohot / @funravenclaw2002 / @nehireerdogan / @ktyflwr / @lilyevanswhore / @edithsvoice / @medalloway-blog / @falconxbarnes

[treasure-hwa]

Beauty of Corruption

pairing: jongho x fem!reader

genre: smut, fluff??

warnings: mentions of first time, corruption kink, praising, light spanking, cockwarming, breath play, dirty talk, fingering (f receiving), explicit protected sex

synopsis: you were so pure that Jongho's heart ached for you and wanted to keep you safe from all profanities, but his mind could just picture himself doing these profanities to you.

word count: 3204

taglist: @little-precious-baby @suni-ho @leetaeilsnecktattoo @xduygu-arsx

author's note: the inspiration came from Jongho's words on I'm the One jacket video, "for the first time, I put myself in the words 'beauty of corruption'." What's with this word count? I really unleashed my smut writer :D anyway, I hope there isn't any typo...

— So how was he?

Your eyes went wide and your face heated up instantly.

— What are you talking about?

— C’mon, you know what I am talking about. You two have been dating for almost two years now and you lost your virginity, as a good friend, I want to know how he treated you.

It hadn't been long since you and Jongho added intercourse to your one and a half year relationship. Both of you felt ready to take this step on your intimacy and, when it happened, you couldn't be happier. But maybe it was a mistake to tell that to your best friend, you wanted to tell so many things, but the embarrassment!

— Ah, he... he was good. Took care of me nicely.

— And the...? — She moved her two pointer fingers apart from each other to simulate a size that looked similar to you.

— A little bigger. — With your face on fire, you pushed one of her fingers farther. — That’s it.

The girl stared at her own fingers and gasped, smirking at the friend.

— What a big fun you had, am I right? Were you in for a thick mess too?

— Yes, but stop, please!

She laughed at your figure with hands over your face.

— But, really, how was it?

— It was great. He was the gentlest, it was much better than what I have imagined it would be. I’m actually very happy he was the first and I hope he can be the only one.

The smile on your face confirmed what you were saying. It was amazing to you how you fully trusted him, enough to give yourself to him, your heart, your body, and he loved you so much he took care of it properly. Jongho was the sweetest man you could have ever met and everyday you were thankful for that.

— So it was, like, vanilla?

— Yeah. Gentle, chill, vanilla, definitely pleasurable. — You bit your lip, playing with your fingers.

Since your first time, you would often catch yourself daydreaming about his body on top of (or under) you, his many muscles flexing, the sweat covering his skin. Jongho also thought about you frequently, how you would muffle the moans of his name, hide your blushing face and touch him gently.

As a traditional virgin, you did not know much about sex, just the basic biology classes and life taught you, so your boyfriend made sure you were comfortable with every move he made. 

With that said, you were pure. So pure that sometimes Jongho's heart ached for doing such profanities to you. It seemed wrong. You looked cute, pretty and shy even when you were a mess, even when he was thrusting into you. But there was something the man couldn't get out of his mind: while he wanted to protect you from bad and dirty things, he, all the time, imagined himself wrecking you. However, his desires were nothing close to the love he felt for you and you did not deserve the bad things he was thinking of, so he kept all to himself, fantasizing only.

Well... your mind changed a little after an interesting talk with your friend, who had 0 experience, but a head full of indecencies she would like to try eventually, and you wanted to try some new things on the next opportunity.

That came on Saturday date night, when you two decided to watch movies on your house, that was significantly quieter and more peaceful than his shared one with other friends. Judging only by the cover of the movie, Jongho pressed play on it, even after you expressed doubts for it being a horror one. 

— Jongho, you know I hate horror movies. 

— Babe, it's alright, it's all fake, and I'm here to protect you. 

“Maybe I could try one of those things she told me now.” You thought about it deeply, but the words came out of your mouth before you could really think about them: 

— I have a condition. 

— Hm? Which one? 

Then your cheeks burned. Why did you say that? Why didn't you just stay shut? You were too shy to tell him what has been on your mind for the past week. 

— I'm listening, babe, tell me. — His hand caressed your knee and he leaned towards to press a kiss on your cheek. 

Taking a deep breath, you mumbled, deciding you had nothing to lose: 

— Let me cockwarm you.

His moves stopped at the same moment, face close to yours, hand lightly gripping your thigh.

— Wh-What?

— Cockwarm. Have you heard of it?

— Yeah, I... I just didn’t know you did.

You shrugged your shoulders and stood up, hands on the tie of your sweatshorts.

— So? Can we?

Jongho blinked at your figure, looking at your bare legs for more time than necessary, his member twitching inside his sweatpants, and nodded, pulling his pants down enough to take his cock out. He watched you, almost teasingly, pulling your shorts down and doing the same with your blue cotton panties, mindlessly stroking himself. To be honest, he felt like he was a teen again, getting horny by every little thing you did, enjoying every opportunity he had to get intimate like this with you.

You placed your shorts and panties on the couch arm and smiled nervously at him, cheeks burning and hands fiddling with the hem of your mid-thigh-long shirt.

— Are you sure you want to do that?

You nodded.

— That’s my condition for watching a horror movie.

— Fuck. Come here. — The man took you by your waist and placed you on his lap, back to his chest. His hands roamed your body slowly, from shoulders to knees, squeezing the flesh of your bare thighs, opening them to run his fingertips through your warm skin. Then, he whispered on your ear: — Are you ready?

Again, you nodded, and he put his half-hard cock in you, groaning lowly until he was snuggled against you.

— Okay, great... now movie, shall we?

The first minutes, when there was nothing bad happening on the story, you rested on Jongho’s chest, his strong arms wrapped around you and chin resting on your shoulder. That until he got bored of sitting and, hugging you tightly, moved you both to lay down spooning you both without breaking that contact.

— You okay? — You asked lowly, caressing his arm.

— Yeah, just wanted to lay down. Pay attention to the movie, dear. — He kissed your head and kept watching the movie as if nothing was going on down there.

More minutes passed, the story getting scarier each second, your hand covering half of your sight, because even scared, you wanted to know what would happen.

Then it happened. A big jump scare that made you yelp and involuntarily clench your walls around Jongho, making the boy hiss for a second, when you unclenched. His hand stayed on your naked hip, caressing it with his thumb, as he asked:

— Are you alright, love?

— Ahn? Oh, yeah, I just got scared and my body reacted, I guess.

The boy hummed in agreement, not thinking much and just focusing on the TV again.

As the story progressed, though, more jump scares made you clench and unclench to the point he was fully hard inside of you and no longer paid attention to the movie.

— Babe, can you try stopping this?

— Am I doing it again? Sorry.

But you were not. Jongho could hear the smile on your voice, so he took your face and turned it just to see a stupid grin shaping your lips.

— What’s wrong, love?

He scoffed, pressing the tip of his tongue to the corner of his lips.

— What’s wrong? Well, maybe my girl being needy for cock is what’s wrong. Was this your plan from the very start?

— You were the one who wanted to watch a horror movie. — You shrugged your shoulders and pushed your hips against his, letting out a huff.

— Something tells me you don’t care about the movie at all, sweet baby.

— And what do you think I care about?

Jongho pushed his hips forward, causing you an eye roll from pleasure.

— Dirty girl is loving a cock inside her, right? — You nodded and bit your lips to prevent moans. — I want words, dear.

— Right, Jongho, you are so... big and it is filling me up... nicely — you spoke lowly, chest moving up and down with your heavy breathing. — Fuck me, please.

— My pretty girl wants to fuck? — You nodded and pouted at the images coming on your head. — If you want me that much, who am I to deny it?

Easily, he picked you up, making you hiss about your empty entrance, and walked to your room, never once stumbling, his perfect arms holding you like you weighted nothing, but you expected that from him already.

You were at home, there was no risk of getting caught, however he pressed you against the door to close it and kissed you like there was no tomorrow while slipping his fingers on your core, which made you moan his name quietly in his mouth. 

— You are so wet, angel, can you hear it? — His fingertips were thrusting shallow and curling into you, making squelching noises. You were pretty sure you would be leaking on the floor soon, such was the wet sensation down there.

You shook your head up and down, moaning again. Jongho made your legs wrap tighter around his waist before getting you to bed, laying you down and staying on his feet to look at you, all messed up already.

— Stay pretty here while I go take something.

You saw the man running out of the room, tripping on his own foot. He could not believe his fantasies would be turning real that soon. Weren’t you his angel? His innocent girl? He did not know what happened from the last time you had sex to that moment, but he thanked it. Going through the bags he brought, he found the condom box he bought earlier that night to leave at your house. You weren’t taking any chances of a baby right now and these things better do the job.

When he came back to the room, another trip on the stairs later, he found you face down on the pillow, hips up, swinging lightly and shirt lifted, tummy and a piece of your boob showing.

— What are you doing, love? Wanted me to see your pretty bum? — Jongho tossed the condom box on the bed beside you and caressed your bottom flesh. — Perhaps you want me to spank it.

His grip felt strong already, which, yes, made you want him to spank you much more than before, so, being the tease you were being that night, you shook your bum to him and looked back, whispering “do it”. It was a matter of seconds for him to process what you said and to lift his hand to leave a great slap to your skin.

— Do we remember what to say if things don't go well?

After you had mumbled “red”, his heavy hand made contact with you again, and you could feel the warmth spreading on the local. It was good, better than you had imagined, his hand felt amazing on you.

— Oh, angel, you look so pretty right now, what do I do? I want to fuck you so hard right now. — Another slap, another moan. — So hard you forget your name.

His voice was too sweet for the words he was speaking, but you had no complaints.

— Am I pretty? — you croaked out, turning to lay on your back. Your shirt was so up, almost revealing your perfect boobs.

His eyes were on fire, but seemed to soft a little when he took in your figure, hair all over the place, eyes wet, lips red. You still looked innocent, but such a hot one, an angel he would corrupt soon.

Jongho lowered himself down and kissed your exposed hip up to your flexed stomach, the pleasure knot being built there, then he gently took off your shirt to kiss around your soft nipples. With his eyes on you, he whispered:

— The prettiest.

You smiled softly and shyly, cheeks burning and hands making their way to his red hair, once there, they gently pulled him up until your lips crashed in a passionate kiss.

— The prettiest girl in this whole wide world and she’s mine. My pretty girl.

You mewled his name, giggling because of the pet name he had been using for a good time then. 

— What?

He pinned your wrists to the bed with a hand, got closer to your neck and, then, all your body hair shivered the moment his hot breath fanned over your hot skin. Yes, you needed him so much, but on top of that you wanted him, you desired him and you knew he did too, especially with the way he was kissing your neck and collarbones while his hand went south to open your legs.

The sensations felt good, they sure did, but when your eyes fell shut, your other senses were sharpened, mainly your touch. Your mind was wrapped around his warm hand cupping your intimacy at the same time your hands mindlessly ran down his back.

— Tell me, love, what did you want again?

— Jon-Jongho...

— Yeah, I know you want me, but specify it.

You breathed in and out deeply before opening your eyes and take in his face and body. All you could say, however, was:

— Why are you still clothed?

The man smirked and let go of your body to undress himself quickle. He had no time to tease, he wanted you, you wanted him and both would be fulfilling desires from now on. Without thiking much, he threw the clothes on the floor and opened your legs to fit between them.

— Better, babygirl?

— So much better. — You stretched your hands towards his torso, touching it delicately. Jongho knew you loved his body and everithing it could do to you and, as much as he would love you to appreciate him a bit more, he wasn’t too patient, therefore he let you have your little fun time stroking his abs and cock slowly while he, shakily, took that condom box and opened it, finally moving your hand away to roll one over himself.

— Hmm, Jongho, stop being so sexy, it’s making me want you to fuck me so hard.

— Is it? That can be arranged, my dirty girl.

With a gentle move, he put himself inside you, pressing his lips and furrowing his brows, but not closing his eyes, since he wanted to see your expression, that was so worth it.

— Hm, my babygirl just wants my cock inside her now. You get so lost when I’m inside, babe, right? — You nodded slowly, trying not to move your hips yet, task in which you would be succesfull if his heavy hand hadn’t slapped your thigh. — I want words.

— Ye-Yes?

— As I said, so lost already. — Jongho chuckled and started thrusting in you leisurely, not enough to make your body bounce, but enough to feel every inch. — You feel amazing..

— You... you too, but faster, please.

— Do you deserve it?

— Yes, Jongho, please. I’ve been a good girl for you.

Still not fastening his pace, he stated, mouth hovering over yours.

— That you have, darling, warming my cock, letting me spank your pretty butt and now it’s so eager to receive everything. Is what you want, right? Everything?

You breathed out maybe five “everything”, running your hands on your body, from your breasts to your thighs arounds Jongho’s waist. Said man smiled and did what you wanted, thrusting fast, hard and deep, groaning on your ear and pressing your sweaty bodies together or biting his lips when he saw himself going in and coming out of your absolutely wet entrance. The sounds you made together were definitely music, one you would keep for yourselves, nobody would ever be able to listen to it.

— Fuck! Jongho, close!

— Yeah? Well, then come for me, let me watch how you look when you come.

And he did. He got up and gripped your hips harsher to push himself in harder and watch it again. You couldn’t even care for the fact your hips would have two hand prints on them, you just wanted more.

Your hands were close to you, holding your breasts, and it made you remember your friends words, as weird as it sounded. “Some people say that if you restrict your breath during your orgasm, it gets more intese.” Why not? With only that in mind and the fast pace of Jongho, you brought your hand up to your throat and squeezed it, already feeling your head lighter and making you moan brokenly.

Seeing this and not quite believing his eyes, he swatted your hand away and changed it for his, squeezing the amount he felt safe enough. And, fuck, his hand felt so much better you let a loud moan and tightened your entrance.

— Oh, so my dirty babygirl likes to be choked? Does that make you feel good? Who would have thought...

Rather roughly, he gripped your jaw with his other hand and lowered himself to connect your mouths in a messy kiss. That was all you needed to reach your high. His hand pressing your throat, making your head slightly dizzy, another hand on your jaw, his cock thrusting into you so well, creating squelching noises, his tongue licking your mouths...

Your hands gripped the sheets as you were cumming around his cock, constricting it deliciously, what took him to his own orgasm, emptying his warm cum on the condom. Your moans, groans and heavy breathing echoed through the room while both were blissed out because of the highs.

— Damn... — Jongho carefully slipped out of you, tied the condom and came back to hug your sweaty body. — How was it?

— Perfect — you croaked out, smiling your angel smile.

— You... were different from our other times. What happened?

— Nothing, I just wanted to try new things. Are you feeling betrayed because I never mentioned anything.

— Well, now I’m not, since you let me try these things with you. Cockwarming, spanking and choking? Who would have thought, huh? — He kissed your cheek while his were blushed, although you couldn’t tell if it was because of the previous actions or because of now.

— And I really like your strenght — you remembered. — But I think you knew that already.

— I did.

You laughed breathily and laid on your backs, staring at the ceiling until your breathing was normal again. When that happened, you propped your body on your elbow and called him:

— Wanna go again?

— Again? Oh, I’ve officialy corrupted you. You’re not my innocent angel anymore. — He chuckled, propping himself on his elbow too and pecking your swollen lips.

— You didn’t like it?

— I did. Too much. Guess that’s just the beauty of corruption.

[mypoisonedvine]

Exchanging Gifts | chubby!Bucky Barnes x reader

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARINA!!! @ballyhoobarnes​ you’re such a sweet person and so talented and a great friend and ily and also ur hot, which is less relevant but still worth mentioning

summary: chubby!bucky takes you out for your birthday, and even though he’s inexperienced, he knows how to show you a good time if you know what I mean... listen it’s pretty much fluffy pwp idk what to tell you

warnings: smut!!, oral (m receiving), loss of virginity (his, of course lol), some fingering, overstimulation, creampie kink, praise kink, morning sex, bucky being insecure?? FLUFF it’s FLUFFY you guys but somehow it turned out filthy too idk i couldn’t help it.

word count: just under 4k, hot damn how did that happen

Even though you'd insisted he didn't need to do anything special for your birthday, Bucky had shown up with a dozen roses and dinner reservations.  "Get dressed up fancy," he instructed you the moment you'd opened the door.  "This place has a black tie dress code."

He was a true gentleman the whole night, until he walked you back to your place.  The second you were on the other side of your door, you couldn't keep your hands off of each other.  

"You're so wonderful," you murmured between breathless kisses as you stumbled back towards the couch.

"This better not be you thinking you owe me anything because I paid for your dinner," he chuckled, "on your birthday."

"Oh it's not that at all," you smiled, running your hands over his chest.  

"What is it then?"

You smirked.  He always seemed to need a reason, as if 'you're my boyfriend and you're hot' wasn't reason enough.  "Can I be honest with you, Bucky?" you asked quietly, licking your lips subconsciously.

"Always!"

"It's times like this that I'm just really in the mood to suck your cock."

He stammered a little, running a hand through his hair nervously.

"Really?"

"Yup."

He laughed for a second, then got serious again, then just looked horrifically nervous.  "Oh, well I, uh…"

"We don't have to do anything about that, I just felt like saying it—"

"What if we did do something about it?"

You raised an eyebrow.  "Would you want me to?"

"Of course I want you to," he sighed.  "I know we've been taking things really slow— and I'm so glad you've been patient with me— I just… god, you're perfect," he laughed.

"That's far from the truth," you dismissed.  "But I've been happy to take things slow with you.  Even when sometimes it felt like I would die if I couldn't get my hands on you…"

You ran your hands over his chest, feeling how warm and soft he was beneath the shirt he was wearing.  

"Ah, I've been there," he replied wistfully.

"Really?  You relate to that?"

"I barely made it through dinner," he admitted with a laugh.  "All I could think about was… doing this…" he trailed off as he leaned in and began to lick and suck at your neck; his arms wrapped around your waist and you were like putty in them.

"Oh god, Buck," you moaned.

"Say my name like that again," he pleaded.

"Make me," you challenged.

He growled a little as he pulled you back to straddle him on the couch.  You couldn't stop yourself from grinding down on him, moaning again when you felt the hard shape of his cock rubbing right against your clit through your dress and panties.

"Mm, take this off," you purred, tugging at his shirt and tie.

"C-can I keep it on?"

You got a little more serious.  "Of course you can, if you want to.  But I'll admit that I wanna see you."

"And if you don't like what you see?"

"Unlikely, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.  I'll take mine off first if you'd like?"

"Obviously I'd like," he chuckled, "but that's easy for you to say.  You're, you know, sexy and stuff."

"As if you're not?"

"I'm not," he informed you.

"Bucky, I'm gonna level with you: you are so fucking sexy it's actually gonna be the death of me someday," you laughed.  "Don't you realize I think about you all the time?" you asked, getting a little more serious.  "Bucky, those times where you came over and we made out, or fooled around?  As soon as you left I was getting myself off right here on this couch— even when you'd already made me come while you were over.  That's how horny you make me— and when you're not here and all I can do is imagine you, I always call out your name when I—"

"Baby," he groaned, "you'd better stop talking like that or this is gonna end a lot sooner than I want it to."

You chuckled before you started to slip off the straps of your dress, loving the way he watched you do it: enraptured.

You were taken by surprise when, the moment your breasts had spilled from the dress, he leaned forward to suck your nipple between his lips.

With a gasp and a moan, you gripped at his hair and let your head fall back.  Either you were really sensitive, or he was really good at this-- probably a little bit of both, but fuck if you weren’t beyond needy and desperate at this point.

"Please, Bucky," you whimpered.

"What is it, angel?  Anything you want, you can have it," he mumbled as he switched to the other side (symmetry is very important with these sorts of things) and you rubbed your hips against his absent-mindedly.

"Please, please, I need to taste you Bucky, oh my god please let me taste you—"

He nodded and you sighed with relief, beginning to slide down his body as you loosened his tie and opened his shirt.  With each button you exposed more of his body, lathing every inch of skin with kisses.

"How's this?" you asked him softly, looking up at him through your lashes.  "Is this okay?"

"It's very unfamiliar," he answered, "and much more than okay."

"Has nobody done this to you before?"

"Nobody's ever wanted to."

You smirked a little.  "Oh, I doubt that."  You palmed his cock through the suit pants, grinning when he jerked a little under your touch.  Slowly, you opened the fly and pulled it out.

Of course you'd seen his cock before, but not for very long and not up close like this.  It suddenly seemed intimidatingly big; you weren't sure you were going to be able to get much of it in your mouth… but you were excited to try!

You weren't sure you had the heart to tease him very much, but you wanted to give it a try at least.  You licked the head first, then down the shaft, then back up slowly.  He was quiet at first, too busy watching you to say anything, but you knew he was losing patience when his fingers brushed over the side of your face; you could feel his restraint, you could feel that urge to grab your hair and guide you.

"Go ahead," you encouraged, "tell me what you want."

"Put it in your mouth, please," he whimpered.

When you obeyed by pushing his cock all the way to the back of your throat, he made the most beautiful sound: like a gasp and a moan all at once.  His hips bucked up into your throat ever so slightly and the sensation of choking made you grow even wetter.

"Fuck," he sighed, "'s so good…"

You moved up and down, savoring every ridge of him as it slid over your tongue.  Each movement grew a little faster as you used your hand to stroke what your lips couldn't reach.

"Baby," he moaned, "oh my god, s-slow down, please— 'm so close, ah fuck yes—"

You stopped for a moment and used only your hand, catching your breath a little as you took a moment to appreciate how good he looked like this.  

"Is it okay if I make you come?" you asked.

"Is it okay if it doesn't take you very long at all?" he returned, already sounding positively wrecked.

“I’ll take it as a compliment,” you decided.

“You should,” he confirmed, whimpering again when you took him back into your mouth and let your tongue explore whatever it could reach.

The taste of his pre-cum made you moan, and the vibrations of that moan made him grip your shoulder tightly.

“A-angel, please,” he begged, as if he was worried you would stop for some reason.  Your attitude was entirely the opposite, though.  All you could think about was how much you wanted to taste his orgasm and swallow it down.  Fortunately, that dream came true not too much later when he grabbed the back of your neck and moaned your name loudly— loud enough that you were a little worried the neighbors might hear.

But honestly?  You kinda wanted them to.

You kept stroking and sucking until every drop was on your tongue.  You smiled up at him and almost spilled some of it but thankfully avoided that fiasco.

“Show me,” he requested softly; it was a relatively mild show of dominance, but it still sent a shiver down your back as you stuck out your tongue and let his seed gather on it.  “Fuck,” he whispered, “that was… wow.”

You swallowed before answering, because it seemed like a good order to do things in.  The bitter taste as the back of your throat was a small price to pay for him looking at you like that.

“You look drained,” you informed him.

“I am,” he nodded.  “Oh, wait, you mean tired?  Yeah, that too.”

You laughed a little.  “Can we lay down for a minute?”

“It’s 10 p.m., I think it’s acceptable to lay down for more than a minute.”

Deciding to turn in for the night instead (and, of course, have a sleepover), the two of you got ready and changed into pajamas, snuggling up into each other’s arms.

It was an easy sleep after that, and a long one.  Bucky woke up first, the very early light of sunrise being less of an influence on his wakefulness compared to you bumping up against him.  He didn’t mind, though, he liked to watch you for a minute before you woke up anyways, to appreciate how peaceful you looked.

He heard you hum through your sleep, cuddling up closer to him.  It was just cute at first, but then your ass pressed back against crotch and goooood morning…

"Hi there beautiful," he cooed, gently kissing on your temple and down to your neck.  You stirred but didn't wake just yet, though you did smile; and he smiled too, loving the way your lips curled— he could remember how those lips looked wrapped around his cock, swollen and slick with spit and come.  It was a good memory.  

His hand slipped down to your hip, holding you firmly against him: by this point he was so hard he was worried he was going to injure himself somehow.

Finally you woke up, your eyes fluttering open as your sleepy smile turned to a wide, flirtatious grin.

"This might be my favorite way ever to wake up," you informed him.  

He chuckled softly, beginning to kiss along your shoulder.  "Agreed."

His fingers moved down at a teasingly slow pace; you unabashedly opened your legs, hoping to egg him on.  Thankfully, it worked.  He started to suck a mark onto the back of your shoulder as he slipped his hand into your panties, instantly discovering how drenched you were and how swollen and sensitive your clit was.

“Oh you poor thing,” he grinned.  “When’d you get so wet, angel?”

“It never stops around you,” you explained with a shiver.

It didn’t take much more until you were a begging mess, his fingers working their magic and making your whole body alight with energy.

"Bucky, please—" you whimpered.

"What do you need, angel?" he asked with only a hint of coyness shining through his tone.

"I just— I want more, please…"

"We've tried a lot of new things today," he reminded you.  "And it was amazing.  And I wondered what you would say if I told you I want to try something else…"

"Oh really?" you purred.  "What did you have in mind?"

"This might not be the, uh, most hip language but… I want to make love to you."

Your eyes went a little wide.  "Really, Bucky?  I mean, you're sure you want me to be—"

"Yes, I'm so sure, I've never been more sure of anything.  You've been so amazing and I can't think of a better person to have as my first."

I don't just want you to be my first, I want you to be my only, he added internally, too afraid to say it aloud.

"I wanna be your first, Bucky," you agreed softly, brushing your fingers through his hair.  "I'm really— I'm honored you want it to be me.  And also I'm very turned on right now."

He laughed and kissed you again, pulling you close.  As his body settled between your legs, you revelled in how warm you felt— not hot or sweaty (yet), just warm, and safe, and comforted.  He still gave you those butterflies in your stomach, sure, but for once that didn’t seem to just be a cute way of repackaging your anxiety.

With your panties pulled to your ankles and your shirt (which was, of course, actually his shirt that you’d stolen) tossed to the side, he kissed his way down your chest and stomach until his face was buried between your legs.

“Buck, I— fuck I thought you were gonna oh god just like that yes—”

“Wanted to return the favor first,” he explained, his words muffled.

“Didn’t anybody ever tell you it’s rude to talk with your mouth full?” you giggled.

He smiled but kept going, almost gentle at first but quickly finding a few favorite spots and stimulating them mercilessly.

You didn’t mean to pull his hair so hard but he didn’t seem to mind, moaning every time you forced him onto you harder.  "Bucky, oh god, don't stop please!” you sobbed.

Of course he didn’t; he wanted you to come, he was a man on a mission and not much could stop him at this point.  Just as he began to suck on your clit even harder than before— just hard enough to make the threat of pain tingle up your spine— he pressed two fingers into your opening.  One little curl into your g-spot and you were gone, biting down on your lip as your body spasmed uncontrollably.

He moaned as he coaxed you through it; you tried to tap out but he went just a moment longer and for that one moment, you thought your body might just crumble into little pieces from the overwhelming pleasure.

Before you could even catch your breath, he was kissing you again.  Your taste on his lips was divinely filthy.

“Need to be inside you,” he explained with a whisper as he started to take off his boxers.

“Please,” you sighed, too weak to even put a full sentence together.

Even with a very thorough warm-up, you couldn’t help but gasp as he pressed into you.  Your walls fluttered and flexed as they made way for the intrusion, both of you moaning softly while you arched your back to take him deeper.

“Fuck, you feel incredible,” he whispered as his face buried into your neck.  Your arms wrapped around his shoulders— you loved how broad and strong they were— and he pushed up from behind your knees to spread you open for him, the new angle forcing the head of his cock to press right into your spot.

“Fuck!” you cried out.  He sat up slightly and looked a little concerned at first.  “No, it’s good,” you reassured him, “it’s so good, Bucky, right there—”

He pulled back only to quickly push forward again, setting a pace that wasn’t quite rushed but was certainly a bit desperate.  Even so, you were on the verge of begging for more, you needed him so badly.

“Harder, please,” you moaned.  Okay, maybe you were a little past being on the verge.

“Is that how you like it?  Rough?” he asked darkly.

“Maybe,” you grinned.  “Is that how you like it?”

“I don’t know yet,” he responded, his grip on your legs tightening until you were almost tempted to struggle against him just to see if he was strong enough to hold you down, “but I like you telling me how to make you feel good.”

“Then fuck me,” you demanded through your teeth, moaning louder when he obeyed and began to pound into you.  The slapping of skin filled the room, as did the revealing sound of your arousal, and it made your face burn even though you were pretty sure he didn’t mind at all.

You were so sensitive from the last time you came that you were already making quick progress towards the next.  Didn’t help that your swollen clit was brushing against his cock every time it speared into you.

“You’re— fuck— you’re squeezin’ me, angel,” he hissed.  “You gonna come already?”

You couldn’t even speak anymore, just nodding wildly.  He leaned forward to kiss you and you were nearly folded in half as he kept his grip on your legs.  You weren’t sure anything had been so deep inside you before; you were sure you had never made a sound like the one you made in that moment.

“Fuck, s’that good, huh?” he teased in reaction to the way you were nearly screaming already.

“God, you are the cockiest virgin ever,” you laughed, hoping you could delay the inevitable just a bit longer for the sake of your dignity.  You tried to angle your body so he wouldn’t be so deep, so it would be so much, but he held you firm and fucked into you even harder.

“Ah ah ah,” he corrected with a smirk, “no running away, angel.  Gonna make you come on my cock.”

“Oh fuck,” you whimpered, “fuck, Bucky, I’m close…”

“Me too,” he murmured back, kissing you deeply one more time.  You hadn’t even imagined how perfect it would feel to come around him with his tongue still in your mouth, your moans blending with his, his fingers digging into your thighs while your nails were sure to leave marks on his back and shoulders.  But even if you had tried to imagine how perfect it would feel, you couldn’t have ever come close.  The moment you were tumbling over the edge, he was right there with you; you could feel him flexing against your walls as he came, and you were afraid if you let your eyes roll back like you so desperately wanted to, they’d get stuck there or something.  

You just barely heard him murmur ‘angel’ as he kissed all down your neck.  His body relaxed a little on top of you, though you still felt sensitive and tingly from where your bodies were joined.

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” he admitted, looking down at you as his cheeks turned a little pink.

You couldn’t, though, and he sat up with a sigh as you smiled back up at him.  He held your legs up as he pulled out, watching with wide eyes as his come leaked from your hole.  You gasped when he reached down to push it back in with two fingers; your whole body jerked when he moved those fingers inside you and started to rub your g-spot again.

“Bucky, what are you—?” you asked breathlessly, but you were already subconsciously pushing back to ride his fingers.

"I wanna see you come one more time," he explained.  "You just look so perfect when you do it— and it's the best feeling when I'm doing it to you."

“We can definitely agree on that,” you mumbled.  He rubbed little circles over your spot, using his free hand to hold your hips down, forcing you to take all the sensation he was giving you.  Knowing that his come was the lubricant for all this made your head spin.  “F-fuck, right there,” you whimpered.

“I know,” he smiled.  “I can tell you’re close again.”

It wasn’t so much that you were close than that you never got a chance to come down from the high of the last one.

“You’re so perfect, my perfect girl,” he purred, watching you squirm from the praise.  “You wanna be my good girl, don’t you?  You wanna come for me again?”

“Yes,” you groaned, “god, yes, Bucky—”

He pressed against you harder and your moan quickly shifted to a slightly-embarrassing choking noise.  His fingers pumped into faster and faster and your sore walls burned but you still wanted more.  He didn’t let up until you were tightening around him with another orgasm, this one burning brighter but shorter, taking all the energy from you at once.  He watched your face as you came, loving the way you held your breath, the way your eyes fluttered shut, the way you bit down on your lip—

"Bucky— you said one more—" you whined in confusion when you realized his fingers were still moving, if a little slower, and his thumb was reaching up to press into your clit.

"I never said just one more…" he smirked.

"Fuck, I— I dunno if I can take it!" you sobbed, the sensation nearly too much to handle.

"Oh you can," he purred.  "You're so strong, you're so good for me— I know you can.  I know you can give me one more."

You literally squealed when he pulled out his fingers only to put his cock in you again.  You hadn’t even realized he was still hard.

“Oh my god, Bucky!” you cried out, gripping the sheets for dear life.

"You wanna call out my name like you did when I wasn't around?  I bet that's not all you did.  I bet you begged, and pleaded, screamed for me to let you come.  Am I right?"

You nodded feverishly; his laugh in response had just that hint of condescension, that edge of degradation.  Even though you knew he wouldn't judge you for it, admitting it felt dirty in a delicious way.

“‘Cause you wanna be my good girl,” he posited.

“I— I am your good girl,” you stammered, feeling a little silly referring to yourself that way.

He laughed a little, still rubbing your clit as he fucked you hard and fast.  “Yeah, you are, angel.”

The petname, even though you’d heard it a thousand times, was what sent you over the edge the last time.  You nearly kicked him off you as the pleasure finally reached the point that you truly were at your limit, but thankfully he got the hint before that and pulled out, giving you a much needed break.

“Dear god,” you chuckled through your exhaustion, your eyes falling shut, “that was— you are— I can’t—”

“Was it good?” he asked softly as he laid beside you and pulled you into him.

Your eyes shot open again.  “Was… was it good?” you repeated incredulously.  “Buck, it was incredible.  It was life-ruining.  I thought your first time was going to be about you.”

“It was!  Making you come four times is me spoiling myself,” he explained, kissing your shoulder.  “What’s about you is me letting you shower first.”

“You aren’t gonna join me?” you asked coyly.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, angel,” he warned.  “I think you need a rest.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” you grumbled disappointedly.  The last thing you needed was to pass out in the shower from him doing that to you again.  “Is it really a whole year until my next birthday?” 

“Yeah, sadly that’s how those work,” he smiled. 

“What about your birthday?” 

“Not ‘til March.”

“...that means your half-birthday is just a week away,” you realized.

“So?”

“I think we should start celebrating those.”

He laughed a little.  “You wanna get me a half-present?”

“Yeah,” you decided.  “I think I’m gonna pay for half of your dinner.  Then I’m gonna fuck you halfway to death.”