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#he looks more like rose than he does like dave
loving-family-poll · 3 months
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Ultimate Incest Tournament - Semifinals
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Propaganda under the cut:
Sam/Dean:
I'm sorry but they have it all. children of metaphorical incest just continuing the cycle in any way they can. they are brothers and mother + son and wives and each other's scorned lovers and life partners they've had multiple infidelity arcs they are sexually psychopathic together they have forsook life and morality and the earth itself for each other and just love each other so much . They are literally in a heaven of their own making together for eternity, incestuously. Come on!!! Blueprint!!!!! It's not gay if he's your brother!!!!!
dean did stuff to sam's dead body in ahbl. i just know it
Messed-up, isolated sibs with all the daddy and abandonment issues. Their lives are so claustrophobic with the brothers no more than five feet apart in the car, a motel room, or standing next to civilians (face it, they are frigging magnets). Can't leave out that they are always touching each other to check for wounds which is a huge PLUS for any shipper.
Sam and Dean ARE literally the blowjob brothers. They walk into a situation and everyone goes well well well if it isn't the blowjob brothers....... And they say. Yep. That's us. And then they fix the situation with their epic love story
THE classic, iconic, show shopping, never done before etc. etc. incest ship. It changed fandom and it changed the world
Dave/Rose:
Daverose blondetwin sweep because they were codependent without ever meeting from growing up seeing each other in their dreams
What does it mean to be an abused teenage boy growing up alone and seeing a girl in your dreams every night who is also your best friend. and when you finally meet her you go on a suicide mission together even though nobody was asking you to die with her. and then you are the only two human beings left in the recognizable universe on a cold meteor surrounded by aliens but you’re glad it’s with her. and when you finally touch the girl from your childhood dreams she looks exactly like you. because she’s your sister
I don't have words for how good these snarky assholes are together. DaveRose is brain chemistry changing. They both put up so many fronts, and engage in so much snarky wordplay, and are constantly trying to get under each other's facade. They play off each other so well, witty and sharp, I need them to be together always
We all die & we all die alone are the two cold truths of the universe but dave and rose broke both simultaneously by ascending to godhood together
Their twincest wins because it is just so confusingly tragic? profound? dave leaving rose behind in a doomed world, dave following her to the bomb. they are both so closed & cut off & curt its hard to imagine the depth of these things. but that is their love language: giving up their lives for each other over and over, in a confusing and fumbling and heartfelt love song. i can’t say i love you but i know we’ll die together anyway. because we’re made of the exact same stuff. i’ll find you again at the last moment. that’s love.
THEY DIED TOGETHER, YOUR HONOR
Confirmed canon by the author, (something happened) between them. Parallels of dying by each other's sides in EVERY timeline. They are THE womb-to-tomb. There is nothing platonic about winking at your brother while talking about crushes, that shit is incestuous. Seer/Knight archetype. They will die protecting each other.
do you realize love someone if you don’t follow them on a suicide mission into the gaping maw of a literal fucking sun after they knock you out and psychoanalyze you in your dreams? the blueprint of the “ethereal androgynous blonde boygirl twins” trope. witch/knight dynamics. they find each other to die together in every timeline no matter what (but they’re still emotionally constipated teenagers who bicker and make fun of each other in pesterchum). kids with grown-up powers. perfect little freaks of nature. what if we looked exactly like each other’s eyes
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bingerzone · 15 days
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I did some traditional doodles that I forgot to post :0 I've been in a BIG TIME homestuck mood hehehe... I miss these little fuckers. I really want to draw them more!! Also, here's the text because my handwriting is rough in places dhfjskds:
From Top to Bottom, Left to Right [PAGE 1] Rose: June dear you know I love your mullet more than anything, but don't you think you'd love so beautiful with not that? Kanaya: I Like Her Mullet Quite A Lot, Actually. Note: (She does not) Kanaya: I've Actually Considered Trying One Out Myself. Note: (She has not) Arrow Pointing at Rose: She has been trying to get June to cut her hair so she and Kanaya can ask her out Arrow Pointing at Dave: Super not over June Arrow Pointing at June: Oblivious June's T-Shirt: I MET GOD. HE'S SHE'S [PAGE 2]
Dave: it wouldnt be that weird if someone were to date their siblings gf right. as long as youre cool about it and stuff Karkat: THE LAST TIME I SHARED MY OPINION ON HUMAN SIBLINGS YOU COULDN'T LOOK DIRK IN THE EYES FOR A WEEK. SO I'M NOT ANSWERING THAT. Karkat: OH MY GOD DID HE JUST Dave: indirect kiss.... Karkat: KISS HER YOURSELF SHITFUCK [PAGE 3] The word that's used in the chart multiple times is 'Crush' June: I'm sorry Dave, I'm a lesbian... Dave: arent you hate dating karkat June: Is Karkat not a he/him butch Under Karkat: (Is actually genderfluid but never mentions it) Under June: (I HC as bi but.... punchline)
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conceptofjoy · 3 months
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pushing my alpha dave hater agenda
mr strider leaves dirk in the mcdonalds play place on multiple occasions both on accident and on purpose bc like where would a 5 yr old even go (underestimating power of a young strider)
when dirk knows he and strider are being watched by paparazzi he will go to unreasonable lengths to get him to break character leading to less than mature retaliation by bro
example: dirk drops a small insectioid robot as they're ordering snacks from an outdoor stall with the goal of making it crawl up his pant leg and pinch the shit out his calf. strider pays for dirks smoothie (graciously bumped it up a size into a 16 oz) and just as he tries to walks away he trips over his tied together shoelaces launching the fuck out of his creamsicle smoothie. dave being ever so kind sits him up and pats down his ruffled edges and pulls a weird looking mechanical bug out from behind his ear and hands it to him. doesnt even get him a new smoothie the asshole.
dirk thinks its weird that he's called him bro his whole life but even more weird to call him like. dad.
dirk doesnt even know where the sona starts and his actual personality ends (very beta rose-core) so when dave does anything genuine hes like wheres the Catch???
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mustainegf · 9 days
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dilf teacher! dave mustaine who teaches female reader how to touch herself
WOAH im gonna award you with best request of the fucking century, this shit has me EXPLODING. I love for this one so much nonnie. Literally dm me I wanna be ur friend 😭
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The lecture had long finished, and I found myself staying late with my professor. Professor Mustaine.
He had very long ginger hair, and sharpest, most handsome eyes you'd ever seen. They were enough to slice me in half.
He was tall too, and I loved how his broad shoulders tapered down to his narrow hips. He was so beautiful that sometimes I wondered if he was real. If he wasn't some figment of my imagination.
I know he could tell I had a bit of a crush on him, because he didn't let other students sit in his lap like I was right now.
I Knew it was crazy. I knew it was wrong. I knew it was scandalous. But I couldn't help but love how he made me feel. "Tell me sweetheart.." he trailed off, running his hands down my body. "How often to you touch yourself for me?" He asked with a smug grin.
I blushed. My face turned bright red. I turned my head away from him, but he caught me, turning me back towards him. "Answer me." He said firmly.
"I-I don't know what you mean?" I said quickly.
"You mean to say you've never touched yourself?
You've never masturbated?" His voice rose into a laugh as I nodded shyly. "Oh, sweetie. It's time you learned then isn't it?"
He said softly. I nodded again, this time my eyes pleading with him to take me. He chuckled slightly.
"Stand up sweetheart." He ordered. I stood up and stepped out of the chair. I glanced around the room, wondering who would find us here. But when I Looked back at him, he was still staring at me.
"Look at me," he ordered, and I obeyed. "Good girl.
Now take your clothes off for me." He commanded, and once again, I did as I was told.
When I was naked, I felt self-conscious. But his hands on me brought me to life. They made me want to be the best version of myself. To please him any way he wanted. "Is that better?" He asked. I nodded.
"Sit on my desk," he instructed, helping lift me up onto the large desktop. My leg instinctively shut, afraid of him looking at me down there.
He stood behind the desk, my back laying against his chest. He had a good view down my body and where I would soon play with myself. He smiled, seeing my discomfort, and said, "Open them for me. Open your legs." I obeyed him hesitantly, feeling foolish that I hadn't done this sooner.
I was scared, I had never done this before, but I was grateful to have professor Dave to show me how.
He gently brushed the hair out of my face and looked me in the eyes. "We will go at your pace. I promise. I just want you to know how to make yourself feel good when I can't."
He took my hand in his, slowly pulling my fingers to my crotch.
I squirmed under his touch, wanting more.
Wanting all of him. But I trusted him, and I knew he wouldn't do anything to hurt me.
He took my finger and placed it over my clit, circling it slowly. It took me a second to adjust, and then the pleasure hit me like a brick wall. It felt so good, better than anything I've ever felt before.
"Rub in circles, can you do that for me?" Dave whispered, still softly guiding my hand.
I nodded and began rubbing in little circles. He leaned forward, kissing my shoulder. It was so soft and gentle, I felt as though I were floating. It was hard to keep focus on what I was doing.
"Such a good job, does that feel good?" He asked gently, watching with the hungriest eyes as I masturbated for the very first time in front of him.
"Yes, Sir." I moaned, unable to answer any other way. "Lower your fingers, feel how wet you are,"
he ordered, making me lower my fingers so I could feel how slick my pussy was. I gasped slightly at the fluids dripping down my thighs.
"Is that all for me, sweet girl?" He cooed, also reaching down to feel how soaked I was. I nodded hastily, my pussy throbbing with these new sensations.
"I want you to put two fingers inside of you," he instructed me. "B-but profess-" he cut me off before I could finish. "Do it, I promise it'll feel good."
I did as he said, sliding two fingers into my hot core. I gasped in shock, and he chuckled slightly.
"That's it. Feel how tight you are? That feels so good, doesn't it?" I nodded, breathing heavily.
He took my hand in his, showing me how to use my thumb on my clit while my fingers were deep inside of me. Slowly, he guided my hand, making sure I knew exactly what to do.
It hurt a little bit but I quickly got used to my own fingers, curling this slightly as I fingered myself.
The pain turned into a delicious ache, and soon the only thing I was able to focus on was the arousal.
"That's such a good girl," Dave encouraged.
I could feel the knot in my stomach becoming increasingly tight and I had a feeling I was gonna cum. "Professor, I think I'm gonna cum, what do I do?" I whined in panic.
"You don't need to do anything, just let it happen," he reassured me. "Let go." And that was exactly what I did.
I continued to work at myself until I finally felt release, it was the most pleasure I'd ever felt in my life, all compacted into a few seconds. I moaned out, squirting cum all over my legs and our hands.
The liquid sprayed slightly until it came to a dribble, a puddle of cum all over his desk.
"Oh god," I breathed out, completely spent. Dave chuckled. "Well, there's your first lesson."
I exhaled with a slight laugh, leaning my head back into his shoulder. "Did you like that?" He asked me softly, brushing my cheek.
I blushed slightly, trying to ignore the strong urges that were still running through me. "Y-yes, Sir." I stammered, unsure what to say. "Good girl," he praised, kissing my cheek.
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charliecuntcicle · 1 month
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Why are the StriLondes treated more like a family than the Egbert-Harleys?: My thoughts
So, I've noticed that a lot of the time, despite them both being ectobiological families, in fandom and to some extent canon the StriLondes are more focused on being a family than the Egbert-Harleys. It's very easy to boil that down to the fact that StriLondes are just...more popular than the Egbert-Harleys, so they have more content in general focused on them, including family-based content. And you'd be right! That most certainly is a factor! However it's more than just that.
When you get down to it, the Egbert-Harley's all had very positive parental figures in their lives. John with his dad, Jade with Bec and, to an extent, her stuffed grandfather, Jane with her dad, and Jake with his grandma up until her death.
With the StriLondes, none of them had that. Dirk and Roxy had people they admired and thought of as positive parental figures, sure, but those figures were never properly in their lives. Dave's bro is around but he serves as a negative parental figure in his abuse to Dave. Rose's mom is around and does care for her daughter, but her alcoholism and Rose's way of interpreting certain actions have tilted their relationship into a negative one.
The Egbert-Harley's have experienced positive parental influence, no matter how short lived it was (*cough* Jake *cough*). The StriLondes have not experienced this.
It's why when Dave meets Roxy he wants to call her mom. He wants that positive parental figure like hes seen others have. It's why, despite everything, he and Dirk sit down on that roof and talk over everything.
It's why when Rose and Roxy meet they both fumble over calling each other mom and figuring out what they are to each other. Rose wants to make things right with her mom, even if it's not the version she knew. Roxy wants some semblance of the mom she never had.
When the Egbert-Harley's interact, sure, it's sweet, they have some nice moments. But none of them have that distinct need for a parental figure like the StriLondes do.
Jake and Jade are excited to meet a version of the people they lost so young, but they don't have a particular desire to serve as each other's grandchildren. They're fine if their relationship falls more into friendship than family.
John and Jane are excited to meet each other, it's cool to meet a version of a dead respected member of your family! But John and Jane never knew their grandparents and they didn't grow up admiring them the way Dirk and Roxy looked up to their versions of Dave and Rose.
The StriLondes are more into the whole family thing, using familiar terms and these types of dynamics seeping into their conversations. The Egbert-Harleys are okay wherever their dynamic falls, they're just happy to know each other.
This isn't to say the Egbert-Harleys don't call each other familial terms ever, because they do, but it's not in the same way the StriLondes do it. The Egbert-Harleys call each other familial terms in a "Oh hey you're my [x]! That's so cool! I'm glad I get to meet you!" way rather than a "Holy shit that's our mom holy shit Rose that's our mom that's our fucking mom" way.
TLDR: The StriLondes crave positive parental figures because of their complete lack of them whereas the Egbert-Harleys already had those positive parental figures at one point or another.
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thewertsearch · 10 months
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You have got to stop falling asleep.
Yeah, good luck with that. Thanks to Vriska's psychic interference, I think we'll be seeing a lot of the Ghost Princess.
If she's haunting the Dream Bubbles, her realself was probably killed in her sleep - and not necessarily by Jack, come to think of it. She's sharing a Veil with at least two murderers, although neither of them have any particular grudge against her.
Either way, it looks like the Veil won't be a safe place for much longer. Time is running out for the trolls.
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Time to see how much of the Green Sun's fire is in these mooks.
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That is one menacing-looking Imp.
It certainly seems to be overflowing with First Guardian energy - but is it bulletproof?
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Irrelevant, since it apparently still has the body portal.
Oh, dear.
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Holy shit, yes! Stop the battle here!
Side note - this music is excellent. The Strife themes are consistently some of the best music in the comic.
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Jade's exploring the whole Space, I take it.
I see John's Windy Thing is still active. Part of his Quest is to send The Breeze through his Land's pipes, and that seems more than achievable now.
Perhaps all Quests require mastery of your Sburb abilities. I might need to review my own, once my Title is locked in.
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Two feet, Jade. Look two feet to your left.
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Dave woke up the moment she fired, and had his shades on before the bullet reached the Imp.
He does share his brother's speed, after all - and using it to restore his ironic façade is quintessentially Dave.
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This seems to be the flash where Jade nearly meets all her friends, so I'm assuming Rose is right out of shot here.
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She also nearly meets her mother. Come on, Jade - stay for some ghost cookies!
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I was wondering if the Bec Imp would be a rare spawn - but nope, this guy is our new Goomba. Yeesh.
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Imps haven't really been a problem so far. They mostly just fool around, presumably because they're part jester. Stronger Underlings are a little more serious, though, and a Bec Ogre is a frightening thought.
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Oddly enough, this one of the most exciting animations so far. This Strife is turning into a roulette, and Jade could be anywhere when it comes to an end.
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...including right where she started. Dang it!
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stevenssticks · 8 months
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idk if you've done it before but i NEED virgin! subby dave and giving him his first blow job i just wanna make him feel good :((
ARKDBJKBHEB DAVE DAVE DAVE!!!!!!!!!!! god he wpild be so fucking crazy for you.
maybe youre his first girlfriend. after a few dates and maybe him sleeping over at your house omce you decide to take it to the next level with him. except dave is hiding something from you. he gets more hestitany with his kisses when you grind down on him as you sit on the couch, even if he doesn't realize he's doing it. you pull away first, looking into those pretty eyes of his.
"what's wrong, dave? are you okay?" dave shudders as you shift a little, rubbing against his hard on in his jeans.
"f-fine, everything's fine i uh.. just haven't done any of this before." and holy shit that's hotter than you thought it would be. dave starts spewing out apologies, telling you that he can "get up and leave" if he's not what you want, but you make him stay firmly pressed into the couch.
you kiss him again, deeper and more heated. "can i blow you?" the question slips out of your mouth before you can even think about it. dave lets out a shaky breath, blinking u oat you blearily. you wanna give it all to him. he looks so perfect like this, all breathy and strung out on your kisses.
"fuck.. yeah. yeah i want it. please?" oh, he's so sweet like this, really. you slide down his body, taking his hips in your hands and shifting him so his feet are planted on the ground. you unbuckle his pants, undoing the zipper and gesturing for him to lift his legs so you can slide them off. dave's hands are shaking as he watches you. licking his lips and biting them until they're a pretty rose pink. you move back in between his spread thighs, rubbing his bulge with the palm of your hand. dave contorts at your touch, squirming and tensing up. you take his boxers and pull the waistband down under his cock, the length springing up against his chest. he's vibrating with anticipation. "please... need it so bad."
you give him kisses up the side, taking him in your hand and pumping him a few times before closing your mouth around the head, looking up at him as you start to swallow him down. you come up to suck the tip again, going down farther than you did before. dave is letting out these little whines every time you take him deeper, hand coming to rest on your head. you want him to be louder, so you take him down all the way to his base, nose hitting the trimmed hair he has there.
"oh fuck.. your mouth feels so good." he brings his other hand to your head as you look up at him with doe eyes. dave's so far gone he doesn't fully realize he's pushing you down until he does, you letting out a muffled moan around him, making him yelp and buck up into you. you whine, going lax as you let dave use you, wanting this to be the best for him. he keeps repeating "sorry, i'm so sorry. feel so good. can't stop, i'm sorry." over and over again each time he thrusts into your throat, hunching over you and then keeping you there.
"oh god, im gonna cum so hard. oh, shit!" and then dave is cumming down your throat, letting out these "auh auh auh" noises that drive you absolutely wild. you swallow around him the best you can, some spit and cum leaking out the corners of your lips. dave pulls out of your mouth, looking down at your debauched state and leaning down to lick up the fluid that escaped before kissing you, moaning at the taste of himself on your tongue. you smile into the kiss before pulling away and planting little pecks all over his face.
"thank you, thank you.." dave mumbles as he hugs you close, breathing in your skin.
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bullet-prooflove · 8 months
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Garden Party: Frankie 'Catfish' Morales x Reader
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Tagging: @aaronhtchnrs @rosaliedepp @mysoulisasunflower @kabloswrld @xoxabs88xox @crazy4chickennuggets @justreblogginfics @witches-unruly-heart @infinity-mars @pimosworld @beardedbarba @est1887 @creativitybeware @mortal--soul @spookyboogyuniverse @corruptedcoffin @nu1freakshow @@oureternalbond  @the-wandering-lunatic @thebaileybugle @proceduralpassion @callsignartemis @kmc1989 @thanossexual @the-wandering-lunatic @thebaileybugle @justreblogginfics @deekaag
Prequel to Come Up for Air
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Frankie meets you at a garden party of all things. It’s his sister’s birthday and he’s spent weeks building the bar out of pallets, because he’s ‘handy’ and his morning stringing fairy lights across the top of the fences, along with fake roses to make the place look ‘magical’. It’s not even a big birthday.
Lucia is two years younger than him and has always lived extravagantly, his little sister deserves the world, but he wishes she wouldn’t whine about how his truck brings down the neighbourhood every time he parks it outside her house.
As he stands underneath the strings of light and looks up at the night sky, he realises that she may have been right about the vibe they bring to the garden. There’s an ethereal air to the place, the flowers accentuate the plush greenery making it seem like botanical wonderland.
He doesn’t know anyone here except Lucia and her husband Dave, the TV Exec. He knows fuck all about what Dave actually does, only that he makes an alarming amount of money. Frankie’s only been home a couple of months and honestly, he kinda sucks at making friends. He’s too quiet, Lucia tells him, too lost in his own head.
How could he not be? He thinks. The shit he’s done. He can’t burden anyone with that. There are only three people who can understand him on any level, and they are certainly not at this party.
A couple more minutes he thinks. He’ll stay a couple more minutes before making his excuses.
That goes completely out of the window when you literally bump into him. He doesn’t know how it happens because he’s standing stationary for Christ’s sake. You’re in the midst of apologising when he reaches out a hand to steady you, his warm palm coming to rest upon your shoulder, thumb accidently skirting your collarbone. It’s the first physical contact he’s had with anyone for a while, and it makes his heart thud even harder in his chest.
When he looks into your eyes he knows he’s in trouble. They’re a stunning shade, the hues bleeding into one another. He’s told women they have beautiful eyes before but with you he means it. The words slip out of his mouth before he can take them back and you tip your head back and laugh. It’s a musical sound that strikes a chord somewhere deep down inside of his soul.
“Pretty bad huh?” He says smiling despite himself.
He doesn’t do this. He doesn’t approach women, he doesn’t hit on them. Every single relationship he’s been in, he’s fallen into.
“I’ve heard worse.” You reply.
He can see it, you’re a striking woman. He’d sure you catch a lot of guy’s attention. There’s no ring on your finger and he feels a surge of hope.
“I bet you have.” He says knowingly, taking a sip of his beer.
It starts from there, the two of you sitting at the makeshift bar long into the night. You’re warm, companionable. He learns that you’re a writer for one of those sketch shows he’s seen on TV, that  you don’t usually tell people that. You list the professions that you’ve made up during your tenure on Tinder, each one becoming more creative and silly the longer it goes on. He finds himself laughing for the first time in a long time and he’s forgotten just how it good it feels.  
“Because they’ll ask for tickets?” he asks, questioning the reasoning behind it. He’s old fashioned, he prefers actually meeting people instead of using apps.
“Mostly.” You tell him before deliberating. “I also don’t want them to have that part of me. Remember this it isn’t a long-term connection I’m looking for; I just want to get fucked.”
Heat creeps across his cheeks and he takes a swig from his beer in an attempt to hide it. He finds your openness refreshing and it emboldens him. He hasn’t had this much fun in a long time, he can’t remember the last frank conversation he had.
“And why is that?” He asks you.
“My schedule.” You say with the shrug of your shoulders. You gesture to the space around you, it’s getting late, or early depending on how you look at it. The sun is just starting to peek over the horizon, bathing the garden in an orange glow. Most of the guests have gone home and the entire yard is in a state of disarray. Frankie can see his sister sprawled out on the couch through the French windows, a blanket haphazardly tossed over her. “Everybody’s going to bed, but this is the golden hour for me. The work I do, the pitching, the rewrites, the editing, the filming, it all happens overnight. It’s entirely nocturnal. You can’t ask anyone to get on board with that. People think they can handle it but they can’t.”
He senses you’ve learned that from experience. That there’s been a boyfriend or two in the past who’ve called it quits because they couldn’t deal with it.
“I’m an insomniac.” He reveals to you, his hand clasped around his beer. “Sometimes when I can’t fall asleep, I drive around the city with the radio on, get out of my own head for a little while.”
“I get that.” You tell him with a smile. “The city is different at night, it’s quiet, it feels like it’s settling.”
You’re not wrong. He sees a lot of shit you don’t see in the day time, but it’s the peacefulness that he enjoys. There’s less traffic on the road, the streets are quieter. He thinks the nightlife suits him.
“The good thing about that is that I know all the good places to eat…” He says checking his watch. “… at four thirty in the morning.”
“Are you asking me out for breakfast?”  
“Would you come along if I did?”
“Yea.” You tell him. “I think I would.”
“There’s a place around the corner.” He tells you, touching the edge of his cap. It’s a nervous gesture, because only now does he realise the enormity of his actions, that the night is shifting towards date territory, and he hasn’t been on a date for a very long time.  “We can walk it?”
“Sounds like a plan.” You say as you climb off the barstool. Frankie follows suit, helping you into your jacket before the two of you slip out through the garden gate, trying to make as little noise as possible. There’s a giddiness to it, he feels like a teenager sneaking out of his parent’s house to meet a girl.
Out on the street he’s surprised when you capture his hand in yours. They fit together perfectly, your fingers entwining with his. It’s been a long time since he’s held someone’s hand, even longer since he’s met someone who he connects with.
“I like this.” He says, his thumb ghosting along the inside of your wrist.
He sees the blush creep up your cheeks and he can’t help but smile because it’s just so fucking adorable.
“Good.” You tell him. “Because I like it too.”
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ale-cart · 3 months
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Dave knowing how to play the drums makes sense to me.
Like, we all know that boy has got some kind of ADHD going on, and drums would be one of the best ways for him to fidget without unwanted attention yk?
Ofc he's still got his turntables, and honestly I can see him finding interests in other instruments too like the piano. Drum-wise though, I feel like he'd have a good time especially creating his own stuff.
Which actually brings me to my gleestuck au, (which I'll explain more about in another post) where Dave actually can't sing haha. Dirk can, and rose does really well with vocals, but Dave is the only stri-londe that cannot sing.
He and dirk will rap-off though for shits and giggles, or as a vocal warmup. Other than that, Dave basically becomes the token drummer.
Which he's more than okay with, because mans got mad stage fright. He finds it easier just being able to play the instrument because he can get lost in the sound and the motions with his hands all while ignoring the on look of people.
They also definitely make exceptions for him as the drummer, such with regionals and concerts yk? He even learns how to play guitar for specific songs the club sings ahhhh
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daedalusdavinci · 2 months
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7 w/ solkat?
7. Unflinchingly settling your head into your lover’s lap while they watch television/are reading a book/doing their favorite hobby. Then asking your lover to explain what’s going on/what they’re doing. i wrote this stream of consciousness and i dont feel like editing it so you get what you get
The nice thing about Karkat is that he's always good for background noise. Whenever you need something else to drown out the voices, he's always there, ranting and raving about some inane bullshit you couldn't care less about, but enjoy hearing regardless. It's an odd day when you can't hear him puttering around the house and mumbling under his breath, cursing out a chair you didn't push in that he tripped over or the food that isn't cooking fast enough. The cat Dave convinced you (convinced Karkat, just by virtue of forcing Karkat to hold it for more than five minutes until all the ice around Karkat's heart melted) to take in is just as loud as he is, and at all hours of the day, you can hear them talking to each other, Karkat's grumble interspersed with the cat's loud meows.
He's quiet today, though. Rose left him with a new book the other day, and apparently today is the day he has the attention span to devour it. You're treated to an uncharacteristic silence as you work, and for a while, it's sort of nice. Until it isn't.
You give up on coding when it feels like there are bugs crawling under your skin, irritation at a boiling point. The code isn't making sense, you can't concentrate, and the screams of the imminently doomed are no longer background, piercing howls destroying any coherent thought you might have left. Your wrists are sore, your neck hurts, your head is throbbing, you're stiff and your eyes are dry and you can't remember the last time you ate. You're done.
Sparks jump from your fingertips as you shove your chair back and ditch your computer. There's a buzzing in your ears that's probably you, but you're too irritable to care as you stalk down the hall to the kitchen. Nothing sounds good, but you know you need to eat if you want to push through this, so you tug open cupboards and force yourself to consider the food anyway.
The cat (Dave wanted to name it Carcinisation; you wanted to name it Hexadecimal. In the end, you compromised on Hexbug, because Karkat said there was no way Dave was naming it after him, Rose liked the nickname Hex, and Dave liked the callback to a human toy you've never heard of) starts meowing at you immediately, trailing a few paces behind you like a starving stray, when you're 100% sure Karkat has been feeding him all his little heart desires. He's as obnoxious and needy as the human who brought him here, and you ignore him, because he's being dramatic and you're so charged up you think you'd shock him if you even tried to pet him. (You do drop him a few treats, because you feel bad.)
In the end, you heat up leftovers. The smell of warm orange chicken makes your stomach perk up a little, and as you eat a few pieces on the way to the couch, you feel a little less like blowing your apartment off the map.
Karkat, predictably, has tucked himself into his favorite corner of the couch with a blanket and the new book. Hex runs past you to jump up on the arm of the couch and complain about your abuse, and without looking up, Karkat lifts a hand to scratch Hex's little, whining head. Because you are the superior lifeform, you flop down on Karkat's other side and bravely resist the urge to complain about Hex framing you.
Karkat looks up for you, though. He blinks the way he does when he's been reading too long, like his eyes are refocusing like a camera lens, and he can't quite see what's in front of him right away. "You look like shit," is the first thing he says.
"Wow, thanks." Despite yourself, you feel your grouchiness crack a little. It probably helps that you're eating now, but there's just something about Karkat, too.
His fingers brush through your hair, like swiping away the static. "You're sparking."
"You don't say."
"Sometimes you don't notice." He's right. He stretches his legs out, unfurling, and his knee pushes into yours. "How's your head?"
"Hurting."
He hums. You don't give him much to work with, and he watches you for a while, thinking. His fingers fiddle absently with the hair at the nape of your neck, arm propped against the back of the couch. His presence makes you feel a little bit more grounded, and so you eat and try to focus on that. Eventually, his eyes drift back to his book.
By the time you finish eating, it stops feeling like enough. You feel less shaky and irritable, but your head is pounding with the force of screams, and you need something else. You push your empty bowl back on the coffee table and twist, dropping sideways across the couch with your head in Karkat's lap. He has to lift his book to accommodate you, but he doesn't protest for a second, seemingly expecting it. His nails drag soothingly along your scalp, and your eyes shut instantly, a wave of relief rolling over you. This is what you needed. Definitely.
Hexbug weaves between you like an asshole, determined to fit himself in the middle of the action. He plops down in the middle of your chest like a big, furry sack of shit, squirming into you to get comfortable until you start petting him. He goes loose instantly, purring quietly at first, and then loudly, the vibration of it rattling your very bones. It feels like it shakes the pain out of you, some inexplicable healing power stored in the rumble of your adorabeast. "He's louder than you," you tell Karkat.
"Tell me something new," Karkat mutters, absentminded.
"What are you reading?"
"Are you asking because you care, or because you want to rag on my taste?"
"Legally, I'm obligated to say the latter, but you know it's both."
Karkat sighs. And then, he talks. And he keeps talking. And the voices fade a little further into the back of your mind, and you relax.
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yanderes-galore · 5 months
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Hello! I hope you have a nice day/night :>
Could I request Feferi and Eridan (Homestuck) sharing/fighting over a human darling? In an AU where they're alive, if that's possible.
Ngl I'm most excited to write for Feferi in this- Things are vague as the request was so sorry if I didn't go into depth :(
AU where they are both alive on The Meteor and you arrived with Rose and Dave in God-Tier.
Yandere! Feferi Peixes/Eridan Ampora with Human! Darling
Pairing: Matespritship❤️/Moirallegience♦️ - Rivalry/Sharing
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Clingy behavior, Needy yanderes, Jealousy, Possessive behavior, Manipulation, Isolation, Rivalry and Sharing mentioned, Forced relationship.
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When they first meet you they have differing reactions.
Eridan acts arrogant and entitled and says he has no interest in mingling with humans.
Meanwhile Feferi is the complete opposite.
She does not display superiority towards you and is actually excited to meet the new humans.
She actually catches you off guard with her running up to you to ask all sorts of questions and to know about you.
Feferi and Eridan have only really chatted with you through the chatting app.
So meeting you in real life is so new.
I expect Eridan to keep chats brief with you until Feferi encourages you two to talk.
Feferi is certainly the driving force for Eridan's obsession over you.
Perhaps the two are still Moirails.
He feels if she's pestering him she'll try.
Well... he doesn't regret it.
He hates to admit it but he really does feel a form of attachment to you.
Feferi is naturally excited and gleeful with everyone so it's hard to tell if she's being her or genuinely has an interest.
You didn't specify what quadrant so I picked two different ones.
As a result there's like four different ways I can look at this;
Matespritship Rivalry = Feferi and Eridan realize they want you as their red love. This puts a strain on their Moirallegience as the two try to convince you they're the "right choice".
Matespritship Sharing = Feferi and Eridan have red love for you but they don't want to fight. The two attempt to preserve their failing Moirallegience with a shared Matespritship with you.
Moirallegience Rivalry = The two end up breaking their Moirallegience off like in canon and try to replace you as their Moirail... only to cause more fighting.
Moirallegience Sharing = The two break off their Moirallegience in order to share you as their Moirail.
In all four ways I imagine both of them are rather needy with you.
Eridan jumps to violence/murder and entitlement when trying to win you over quickly.
Feferi meanwhile is so excited all the time, often taking you attention to drag you around.
The Moirallegience between Feferi and Eridan is very taxing, mostly to Feferi.
So adding you into the mix is somehow supposed to help (when it comes to option 2 and maybe 4).
You may feel as though you're being torn apart when it comes to them as I would consider them both rather needy and attention hungry.
The two may show irritation and rivalry behavior between the two of them but I feel they can't really hurt each other.
Not unless one of them was pushed to the brink.... (*side eyes Eridan*)
You'll catch Feferi ranting about Eridan to you, often saying insults about his behavior.
Eridan tries not to say hurtful things but it ends up being mentioned in his own private rants to you.
He actually finds himself not feeling bad afterwards since he seems to care a lot more for you than his old Moirail.
That behavior would happen more often with options 1 and 3.
I have to be vague with this concept as it in itself is rather vague.
But there is many different ways for how the two could be with a human darling, both sharing and rivalry.
The two are rather needy and have an air of entitlement due to their blood color... even though Feferi tries to hide it.
The two try to act nice with you and slowly court you into the quadrant they want.
However... there's bound to be some complications caused by the two of them.
Due to them being part of the Nautical Aristocracy they feel they should both have a shot with you.
It's up to you if they fight for it or not.
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nerdieforpedro · 2 months
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Day Sixteen - Thunderstorm
Word Count: 452
Warnings: VERY SOFT Dave - that's the only warning?! 👀
Notes: Originally I thought of Jack Daniels getting caught out in a thunderstorm on a mission, but he'd have gear for that. I think... I wanted to do something else for Dave. Our former government employee (I'm not silly enough to say what the man does, I like living thanks,) has even more of a tender side than we thought. 🥰
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Main Masterlist / March Spring Prompts 2024 / Writing Challenge
The forecast for this week didn’t mention rain at all this week. Today’s picnic with the girls went fine too, not a cloud in the sky. Dave was looking forward to catching up on organizing some files while you were sleeping in the king size bed across from him. He liked to watch you sleep after tucking the girls in and keeping an eye on them as they settled in, Alice always snuggled the white teddy bear she’d gotten two years ago on the girls first outing with you to the mall. Simple, he wasn’t sure how they’d react to their father being with someone other than their mother, his ex-wife. They took to you like white on rice and always asked about you, when they could see you again and what they were up to. It made the decision to marry you that much simpler.
The first crack of thunder made Dave flinch, a rare feat. He peered over to you, still, your chest rising and falling as you lay comfortably on your side. You’d curled slightly as you’d been talking to him prior to drifting off. It was known to few that Dave… was not fond of thunderstorms. He didn’t like the sudden booming sounds or flashes of lighting. He didn’t see one outside of the window, only the drops of rain hitting the glass. The rain would lull him to sleep and the thunder would wake him, frustrated at the cycle until he slept out of exhaustion or the storm had passed.
Another rumble with a burst of lightning following it closely told Dave that the storm had grown even closer. His papers soundly hit the night table as he stood and crossed the room to the bed. He removed his t-shirt and sweatpants, leaving them on the floor for now. He’d get to them in the morning. Peeling the covers back, he slipped into the bed beside you, his chest pressed against your back with a soft kiss placed to your neck.
A clap of thunder had Dave’s arms curl around your torso, pulling your closer to him, his chin was tucked itself over your shoulder, the night would be extended for York but he may still find sleep yet. His palm rose to your chest as he felt it rise and fall, counting your breaths until he reached the fifties and everything was lost to darkness save for your warmth. His safe harbor in any storm, Dave could stay asleep like this until the morning, maybe even late if time allowed. A partner as a source of serenity had eluded him until he met you and he would never let go as long as he had you.
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conceptofjoy · 8 days
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you know what. cut the middle man can we get a homestuck game tierlist. immensely interested in your thought process here because if i was in jakes situation ever id be flirting right back at either of those bitches. sorry.
ur telling me if your crush sent you their . ok sure ok. im ranking on how easily the humans can pull someone, not like maintain a relationship.
A) harlishes
B) june and jane
C) rose and roxy
D) daves and hal
F) dirk
jake’s rizz is a main part of his character, he can’t deal with anything more than surface level bc hes a problems haver. jade’s is genuine, she gells well with the daves, karkat was interested in her, she listens to people and’s empathetic, etc.
EVERYONE had a crush on june. her dorky and dry humor had the lesbians tripping over themselves. she wasnt really good at romancing anyone though lol. jane’s silly, down to earth, kind of a nerd, lesbians want him what can i say.
rose is. intriguing. kind of like jake honestly, she looks and acts cool asf and that ends up intimidating people (kanaya) so they have to play a mental game with her to even like talk to her. she thinks everything’s a contesstttt. she isnt able to keep her cool intimidating persona up constantly which can put people off i guess :(
roxy flirts with EVERYONE. she doesnt know when to give up sometimes holy shit. she can come off as intense and can make people feel bad, but the sheer amount of times she takes a chance guarantees her pulling someone. shes funny asf and friendly.
hal… um he doesnt dwell as much on details as dirk does. rolls with the punches better/ deals with rejection better but is equally as clingy. just slightly better than the daves.
the daves barely make the cut. their dorky but endearing swag might get someone to take pity on them. they have too many issues to be in an actual relationship with someone (unless they have just as many issues).
dirk. hes. one person says hes not interested. and hes like this close to immediately crawling under a table or getting down on his hands and knees to start begging. he’ll probably curtly excuse himself to go walk away stiffly (and crawl under a table).
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boliv-jenta · 9 months
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No outbreak Joel Miller x inexperienced f!reader
Dave York x inexperienced f!reader
WC:3.9k
Summary: With the summer coming to an end, Joel teaches you one more lesson.
Warnings: Unprotected P in V sex. Protected P in V sex (explicit, to make up for all the unprotected sex. Use condoms!) Rough oral m!receiving. Swearing. Talk of adultery. Dave York.
Summer Schooled
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Masterlist
It turns out Sarah was actually ill. Just a little tummy bug but it kept her home for a couple of days. When she was starting to recover on the second day you'd dropped in to visit her. 
"Hey!" She'd perked up as you entered the living room where she lay in a nest of blankets and pillows. 
"Hi. I wanted to come check on you. My mom made you some soup." You gestured over your shoulder to where you'd handed the container to Joel in a very awkward interaction. Joel hadn't so much as texted you in the last couple of days so when he opened the door neither of you were sure what to say. He'd made polite conversation, thanked you for the soup, then invited you in to talk to Sarah. 
"Thank you. You wanna stay and watch a movie? We're bingeing bad action movies."
Hesitantly, you looked at Joel. He gave you a half shrug and waved his hand as if he was pushing the ball into your court.
"Yeah. I'd love that. I've missed you this week." That was true, you had. 
When you leave you are going to miss Sarah and the York girls. They're all going to grow up into such amazing women. Funny, smart, strong. Each one has their own distinct little character. They never failed to make you laugh or to come out with something to make you think.
The movie was not even half way over when Sarah fell fast asleep. Her curled up form gently rose and fell with each even breath. Even you standing from the end of the sofa she'd given you was enough to wake her. Joel had tossed his head towards his office to get you to follow him.
"Hey." The same greeting as his daughter but a wildly different tone. He seemed shy almost. With the doors now closed behind him he walked towards you. "I wanted to talk to you before you leave. I kind of got caught up in all of this." His hand came up to rub the back of his neck. "It was Dave's idea to play into all your doe eyed flirting. I know you're not as innocent as you've been making out or I swear to God I would never have touched you, legal or not. I got lost on a power trip. On having you on my terms. I haven't had much luck with women over the last decade. They didn't want to come second to Sarah or third to my business. Which I get…" he caught your eyes looking at him patiently. "...anyway. I just wanted to apologise. I hope I haven't put you off men for life just because…" he trailed off.
Tentatively, you lay a hand on the arm the was now across his chest gripping his other arm. "Because…?"
"Because I was lonely and needed to be seen as more than a father or a contractor. I wanted to be wanted. Fuck, I still don't know if you wanted me or the little fantasy we built up."
"It was definitely you Joel. I liked you plenty before that, because you're a great dad, because you're a competent contractor. It's all very hot. You're very hot, and funny, and smart, and if I were a few years older…"
"Just a few…?" He huffed out a laugh.
"Just a few." You smiled. "I would love to date you."
"How do I know you're not just flattering an old man to get some dick?"
"Because I could go get some old man dick from down the street with a whole lot less work."
"Fair. Make sure you get him tested first though. I did. Twice. I wasn't letting him near you until I knew he was clean."
"I figured you both would. I trust you."
"Just don't go trusting everyone like that." His arm wrapped around you to bring you into a hug. Your hands rested on his chest feeling his heartbeat softly. 
After a moment of just being together in each others arms, you placed a kiss to his lips. "I mean it, Joel. I think you're great and any woman would be lucky to have you." 
Before he could answer Sarah called his name.
Dave's knuckles turned white as his hand gripped over yours on the headboard. If the bed wasn't as sturdy it would have been slapping against the wall from the force of Dave's thrusts. His knees were in between yours spreading them as he took you from behind. The hand that wasn't on yours was working you clit in tight circles. 
"Fuck." He snarled into your hair. "I'm going to miss this pussy. You get so fucking wet…so hot…got me pussy drunk. I just want to keep slamming my dick home. Oh, shit. Ohhh." His cock twitched inside you as felt the warmth of his cum spread. 
For a second you were a little disappointed that you hadn't come yet, then you realised he was still very much hard."Dave?!"
"Little blue pill. I haven't got his pussy for much longer. I'm not wasting it." He carried on his furious pace. There was something about him fucking his cum deeper inside you than made your toes curl and had you coming around him. "Oh, Dave!"
"Oh, that's it. God, the way your tight little cunt clamps down further on my cock…ugh." He dragged you flush against him. The hand from the headboard palmed one of your breasts. He rolled your nipple in between his fingers. His lips sucked at your neck. Twice you'd had to yank his hair to stop him leaving marks. He'd playfully nipped at your ear before moving his lips to kiss somewhere else. He pushed you over the edge twice more before finally beginning to lose his erection. 
When the two of you collapsed on the bed it was odd how your instinct was to find your own space. Even with the oxytocin coursing through your veins giving your vision a rosy tint, you didn't feel the need for any more physical contact. Unlike with Joel where you craved his gentle touch.
"Well I think that's all the lessons I have in me today." Dave slowed his breathing as he lay on his back, his cock soft against his thigh.
"Lessons? You don't seem to be teaching me much. You just rail me." You laughed through your panting.
"Just rail you? Some women would kill for me to just rail them."
"You know what I mean." You slapped his bare chest.
"Up. I gotta change these sheets before Carol gets back." He held out his hand to pull you to your feet before setting to work.
"Why do you cheat on her?" The question was out of your mouth before you thought about it. 
Surprisingly, Dave stopped and sat on the bed, the half bundled up sheets in his hands. He wrang them as he spoke. "I don't think of it as cheating. It's like we're in an open marriage, we just haven't agreed on it out loud. Carol's had her fair share of men."
"So why not talk to her?" You took a chance and sat next to him, just close enough to provide some comfort with your presence.
"I might not be in love with her but I love her. I'd miss her if she were gone. She's family. I'd miss the time we spend together with the girls, as a family. I can't risk that." He turned to look you in the eyes as he spoke. Those brown eyes were so full of sincerity you almost reached out to hug him. Almost.
Bringing yourself back from being lost in his eyes you asked. "Isn't fucking me in her bed risky?" 
"No, that's just sex. Talking about our relationship. That's the risk. That's where things can snowball. I won't do that to my girls."
Again you softened just a touch towards him. Enough to place the barest of kisses to his cheek. "You're a good father, Dave. You're not winning any awards for being a good person but you're a good father."
"Thank you." It was sincere. The two of you sat in the moment. A softness sitting between you that had never been there before. It was pleasant until Dave broke it. "Right. Up. I've got to wash your cum out of my wife's sheets." The playful smirk on his face showed you this was him slipping his mask back in place.
Friday night rolled around. This time on Sunday you'd be in your new home, ready to start your new life. It still didn't seem real. The last couple of years the itch to get out and see the world had been under your skin. Now you were close to finally scratching suddenly it was more of a subtle tingle that you could ignore. Being here with Joel, and Dave, seeing a new part of the world with them, that could be it for now. They could satisfy your wanderlust, as well as a few other lusts. College could wait a year. You could try to romanticise it all you wanted, the truth was cold feet were setting in bad. When Joel called you to look after Sarah you were relieved to have something to distract you.
The Miller's front door opened to reveal Joel. He was freshly showered, his damp hair was slicked back. He looked so good that you had to remind yourself that you were here for Sarah not him. Although you might have worn your short, button down tea dress hoping for even a quick moment with him.
"Hi, Mr Miller." You called Joel by his first name plenty of times in front of Sarah but putting up the pretence of respecting your elders helped to keep you from sliding into other habits with Joel. The last thing you wanted to do was slip up and touch him in front of Sarah.
The door closed behind you seconds before your back met it. Joel was crowding you up against it. His lips crushed to yours, his hand in your hair tugged sharply to open your mouth so he could fill it with his tongue. His other hand worked at pulling down your panties before two thick, calloused fingers skimmed your thigh before being pressed deep inside you. Joel's lips never left yours until the rhythmic pumping of his fingers and the brush of the heel of his palm had you calling his name. 
When he pulled away, leaving you a trembling mess with your panties around your knees being held up by the door, he flashed you that sinister grin. "Dave's got Sarah. He wanted to make up for basically being a piece of shit and stealing more time with you."
Excitement flushed your veins, your heart rate picked up, you felt you were in trouble. Part of you braced yourself when Joel stalked towards you. His chest was almost touching yours when he squatted down slowly, never breaking eye contact, to help you out of your panties. He licked one solidarity strip through your folds before standing up to kiss you. The tang of you on his tongue was electric.
"While he was bragging. He also said you said he doesn't teach you anything. Why don't you tell me what you want for a change? You can be in charge." This Joel was new to you. The predatory smirk was gone. His voice was soft. He wasn't Dom Joel. Or Mr Miller. Or the helpful handyman. This was Joel the equal. The fellow adult. Offering to fill a need.
Tears threatened to form in your eyes. "I'm moving back east, to a new place, I'll have a few friends I can meet up with but other than that I'm on my own in the big bad world. I'll be making my own choice then. Right now, I want you to make my choices for me. I want to be your good girl." 
This Joel gave you a small smile before it twisted and Dom Joel returned. "Oh, you are, Honey. Why don't you drop to your knees for me?" He didn't have to ask twice. His hand came up to cup your chin. His thumb brushed across your lips. "Such a pretty mouth. Why don't you put it to good use for me?" Your eyes flitted to the hard outline in his jeans. "Gone on. Help yourself."
Taking a deep breath to keep yourself together, you got to work on his belt and fly. Pushing his jeans out of the way, the back of your fingers grazed his length stretching his marled grey boxer briefs. The sigh that came from his lips was something you would keep with you for years to come. Literally. The world felt so out of your control at the minute, everything was out of your hands no matter how many lists or plans or vision boards you made. Right now though, as your hands slipped into Joel's underwear to pull out his heavy girth while his breath hitched in his chest, you felt pretty damn in control. 
Starting at his balls you licked a strip right the way up his entire length. He tasted a little musky but there was a cleanness there. His skin smelled faintly like his soap. The tip was salty and tangy due to the pre cum there. It was truly intoxicating. His body wanted you. It was getting ready to slip inside yours. You lapped at his slit for more. Joel's hands had been retrained at his sides, once you wrapped your lips around the head, all bets were off. Both of them buried in your hair. "Jesus. Such a good little whore."
The praise had you squirming at the leak between your legs. "You're treating me so well. Maybe I should do something for you. Remember when you nearly choked on Dave's dick?"
Your throat tightened at the memory, Joel felt it. "Ssshh. It's okay, Darlin'. We'll take it easy." One of his hands held the back of your neck while the other softly brushed your hair back. "Just breathe." Gripping the base of his cock he fed it forward. Each vein rippled over your stretched lips. The weight of his hard length on your tongue made you want to suck. Joel groaned and rolled his hips for a moment. "Naughty girl. Trying to distract me. Now you have to take it deeper. Give me your hand." He peeled your hand off his thigh and made a fist with it. "Now, squeeze it, and press your thumb here. Keep breathing through your nose. Nice and slow. There you go. Oh, shit."
The blunt head of his cock pushed at the back of your tongue kicking in your gag reflex. Concentrating on your fist and breathing slowly you were able to fight it off. Until Joel pushed just a little too far. That time you gagged and coughed around his cock. A line of spit connected your lips to the head when Joel pulled out. "Good girl. You did so well." He soothes as you still spluttered. "You're going to have to do better though." He pulled you up by your hair to push his cock past your lips. The roughness of him made you weak for him. In that moment you would have given him anything. It's freeing to feel like you can completely hand yourself over to him. It's the same with Dave. You trust both of them not to hurt you, even in an effort to keep up their illusion of complete control. He was able to thrust a few times, taking you to the edge of your comfort zone before you gagged again. Once you composed yourself, he held his mouth watering length in front of you. "Do you want more, Baby?" 
Wiping the tears from your eyes, you nodded up at him. "Oh, my good girl. You'll get more." 
With an ease born from his strength, Joel swept you up into his arms.  Laying you on the sofa he slowly undid the buttons of your dress and pushed it off you. His fingers slid under the lace of your bar to push it up.Once your breasts were exposed to him he set about licking, kissing, sucking, caressing every inch as if he was committing them to memory. Maybe he was, you brushed the thought away and gave yourself back over to his touch.
"You're so fucking beautiful. You know that? Truly beautiful. Never let anyone tell you any different." His tone told you the other Joel was back.
This Joel stripped naked before laying a blanket on the sofa and sitting down. "Here, Honey." He pulled you over to straddle his lap. "You can have all the cock you want but I want you to take it. I want you to ride me. Here." Reaching over to his jeans, strewn over the sofa arm, he fished something from the pocket.
"A condom?" For a moment your heart sank. Had he been with someone else?
"I want you to show me you know how to use one of these. Then I want you to show me you know how to take what you need. Well?"
You could do this. You'd practised on cucumbers and watched videos. Hold his cock at the bottom. Make sure the condom is the right way. Pinch the tip to keep the air out, put it on like a little hat then roll it down. Joel's cock wasn't anything like a cucumber. The cucumber didn't make you wet as you slid your hand down it. Fuck, who said putting condoms on ruins the mood.
"Was that the first time you've done that?" Joel raised an eyebrow.
"On a penis, yes. I have some practice with cucumbers." Both Joel's eyebrows shot up. "Not like that!" You giggled. "Just practising putting the condom on."
"Well it paid off. Now you can slip me inside." 
"How…?" God, you felt stupid for having to ask.
"Just guide it with your hand. Once the tip is lined up you can sink down onto it."
Taking him in your hand you got him in the general area then tried to sink down a little. It took a little manoeuvring to get him actually lined up thankfully your slick aided you in finding the right spot. He slid up along your body until he was notched at your entrance. Slowly you sank down on him until you were full.
"There we go. I'll never get tired of that. You fit me like a glove." His words stung your heart. He was talking as if you had a future. Like he would get the opportunity to see if he could get tired. "Time to move, Darlin'. Take what you want."
"Er..how. How do I…? I mean up and down or…?"
"Do what feels right for you. Just don't go too hard or high if you want to bounce on it. I don't want you to break nothin'. Try lifting up a little and just moving back and forth for now."
"Okay. Thank you." 
"You're welcome." The shy smiles you exchanged seemed completely out of place while he was buried inside you. 
Following Joel's advice you moved your hips back and forth. Each time his hard length tapped against the front wall of your pussy, just brushing shy of that perfect spot. For a while you just enjoyed the steady rhythm. Joel seems to too. He leaned back sighing, settling into the sofa at his back.
When your nerves get the better of you, you break the near silence. "Is that…? Does it feel good for you?" 
"So good, Sweetheart. You always do. Is it good for you?"
"It doesn't quite feel like when you do it." The tiny voice that leaves you doesn't say 'grown woman off to college'.
Joel smiles "I'll take that as a compliment. Try bouncing up and down a little or circling your hips."
Bouncing sounds like the closest to when they drive into you so you gave it a go. Rising up, you dropped back down on him. "Oh, Joel!" 
"There you go. Right there, huh?" 
You rose up to drop down on him again, and again. "Fuck. Joel!"
The head of his cock was hitting that spot just right. The both of you could feel your orgasm approaching. "That's it, Baby. You look gorgeous like this."
Joel's praise and your release within reach made you speed up only for Joel's length to slip out from you. "Shit. Sorry." 
"It's okay. It happens. Keep going." Slipping him back in was even easier this time. Your body drew him in deep. A few rounds of your hips and you got back into the rhythm. Soon Joel started to groan more. The vibration of it was under your palms as you pushed off his chest. His head rolled back on the sofa, exposing that beautiful neck. The warm low light from the lamp caused the sheen of sweat on his skin to glisten. He really was the most handsome man you'd ever seen. 
"Fuck, Beautiful. You're going to make me come. Would you like that? Me, filling this condom up because you ride me..ugh…so fucking well?" His voice was strained. He was so close and it was all down to you.
"Joel. I'm gonna…" A silent scream left you as your whole body lit up from where you were joined.
With your tight cunt milking him Joel couldn't hold out any longer. "Oh. Shit. Shit. Oh. Take it, Baby. Take it." He moaned through his release. 
Part of you missed him filling you, claiming you. One look at his face showed that you had claimed him this time. He looked at you, those big brown eyes filled with something you didn't want to think about. Years later you would accept it as love.
"Right." He cleared his throat. "You know how to deal with the condom when you get up?"
"I think so." Reaching down you held the condom in place as you lifted off his softening length.
"Good girl." He took over, pulling off the condom before tying it off and placing it in the discarded wrapper. "I'm going to put it in Dave's mailbox."
"You wouldn't." You laughed curling into his side.
"I have to admit. I am a little jealous." The look on his face made him look boyish.
"Don't be. He's not the one I'm thinking of staying for." Your nerve failed you and you turned away from him.
His finger was curled under your chin and bringing you back instantly. "Sweetheart, I…"
"I know. It's a stupid idea. I can't base my future on this. It's a nice fantasy though." You offered him a smile before kissing his palm.
"It is." A hand cupped the back of your head, curling you back into his side, holding you close. "You know, this doesn't have to end right here and now. You'll be back to visit your mom. If you haven't found anyone your age, I still think I have a few more lessons I can teach you."
A weight lifted from your chest. "I could be up for that."
Little did you both know that that would be the last time you would ever set foot in that house.
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nekropsii · 1 year
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do u have any links to resources about the beta and alpha kids' characterizations and personalities if you have any? i am interested in writing for them and i just wanna know what makes them them iykwim
The Beta + Alpha Kids are... By no means my specialty, as everyone knows, and I personally have zero interest in writing them. That said, I'm pretty sure that most "guides" like that are written by and for writers of lighthearted, canon non-compliant roleplaying, and all the ones that I've seen... Aren't good, and are typically incredibly biased. They definitely tend to want the reader to portray the character in whatever light they see the character in, rather than... How they are in canon. For example, some lean heavily into making Dave a soft, perfect victim, Rose into a tea-drinking lesbian, Jake into a lowkey villain, et cetera.
This is about to get pretty long. It's been a while since I've had to put something under a Read-More... But here we are. Let's get going.
Content Warning: Long, Whole Lot of Rambling about the Technical Aspects of Writing.
There tends to be interjection of headcanons, unnecessary opinions, and ham-fisted attempts to make characters look better or worse than they actually are. Context is missing, sources are missing, so on. Oftentimes when looking at guides to writing characters, I wind up just questioning what comic the writer read, because it doesn't feel as if we read the same one. Their writing and critical thinking skills are often called into question as well, given the way these guides tend to approach characters as a concept.
There's often a distinct failure in being actually analytical or observant, and they tend to view characters more as People than they do... Well, Characters. Which may sound like an odd distinction to make, until you realize that when you're writing a character, you need to understand what role they're fulfilling in a narrative before you focus on who they are as a person and judging their morals. Characters aren't anything more than narrative devices. They're strictly there to drive the plot forward. Yes, since characters tend to be people, of which are often in situations, you tend to judge their morality, ethics, the way they handle their circumstances and other people with average human judgment... But at the end of the day, moral arguments and personhood matter less than what they are meant to do, what they're supposed to represent, and how they're supposed to drive the plot forward. To focus on who and how they are as People- how righteous they are, how much their morals align with yours or those of the real world- is to focus on Form over Function.
Characters are Tools. A tool can be painful to use, or painful to watch in action, but it's still a tool. Sometimes pliers are for pulling teeth, and sometimes they're for twisting wire. You can't effectively pull teeth with a wrench, and you can't effectively hammer a nail with a screwdriver. You could, theoretically, and I'd love to watch someone try, but it's not recommended. It's ineffective. You need to know what a tool is for, how you could use it, and maybe even how you could make your usage of them surprising. A hammer is typically used for driving nails into place. Usually with the head. This doesn't mean you can't drive the nail in with its side, and it doesn't mean you can't use it to break fingers.
What this "Form over Function of a Tool" means in practice is... A lot of "guides" to writing Dave will go over the fact that he is the Ironic Cool Kid who has suffered a lot of Abuse at the hands of Bro Strider, and interject that headcanon of his character arc "being about overcoming Internalized Homophobia and/or Toxic Masculinity" (neither of these are true), but fail to mention that he is essentially a Tutorial Agent, and how his whole character hinges on how he absolutely does not want to be a Main Character. Everything he does is grounded in the fact that he's a Tutorial Agent, and therefore an NPC. He's a regular kid with a rough home life, and wants nothing more than to keep playing his role as just a random NPC. He doesn't want to be a Main Character. He doesn't want to fight, he doesn't want to be in an epic, he just wants to be Some Guy. He wants to be normal, and he wants to be able to be forgotten to the sands of time.
They focus so much on Who he is as a Person that they tend to fail to recognize What he is as a Character. It's not effective. You don't really need to worry about who they are as people. You don't need to focus on the paint job on a tool. You need to know what that tool is, and what it's being used for.
It's best to not consult guides written by other fans. It'd be best if you read through their dialogue yourself, and really dissected them and how they function... Find out what makes them tick.
Luckily, there's a blog out there that does have just about every line of dialogue in Homestuck sorted by character, so that's pretty good for ease of access. Good for you and good for me. I use it all of the time. Here you go.
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thewertsearch · 1 year
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CEB: wait… CEB: are you saying that vriska is interested in me? CEB: like, romantically?
I think she thinks she likes you, the same way she thought she liked Tavros. In her eyes, you're a potential replacement for him, which is a dangerous position to be in.
In short: yes. But watch out!
CTG: do you like her CEB: well, like i said, i thought she was pretty cool… CEB: kinda bossy! but also pretty friendly. CTG: yeah ok CTG: but i mean CTG: anything more than that CTG: like CTG: if earth wasnt destroyed and she werent in some other universe on a planet full of unspeakable frothing dipshits CTG: and she was on earth visiting your town or something CTG: would you want to ask her to go see one of your dumbass movies
Dave is actually helping John talk through his feelings, which is sweet as all hell. His instincts around this are surprisingly good, too - it probably would help John to separate his feelings about Vriska from his current situation.
Try to divorce yourself from the session, just for a second. You're not John the Player - you're John the teenager, and a girl likes you.
What do you think about her?
CEB: i don't think i have ever actually liked a girl before in that way, so i am not really sure what i am supposed to feel or do…
Grew up in a small town in Suburbia, USA.
Raised by a single father who struggles to relate to him.
No extended family to speak of, unless you count the ecto-sister he learned about an hour ago.
Has a social circle consisting of three online besties, and never mentions any IRL friends.
Uses stilted phrases like 'not a homosexual', and is so confused by his own feelings that he can't identify a crush.
John Egbert is a very sheltered kid, is what I'm getting at. I wouldn't be surprised if Karkat and Vriska were the first people who ever had crushes on him. This is all completely new to John, and I don't think has the slightest idea how he's supposed to respond.
Dad's great, but if John asked him for relationship advice, he'd tell his son to get a decent aftershave and a well-pressed suit. He's flying blind, and things will only get more complicated from here on in.
CTG: did one of the human ladies reject you ?CG: OF COURSE NOT. CTG: how did it go did you stand in a quadrant like you were playing four square CTG: holding a bucket full of flowers or slime or whatever and jade was like no thanks bro
I mean, he might have started with John, but he seems to hate Jade quite a lot, too.
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We now know this was after his confession to John. Maybe it was a rebound?
CTG: or maybe it was a guy who rejected you ?CG: FUCK OFF. CTG: haha wow bingo CTG: see how i look right now thats a poker face might want to take some notes ?CG: I SEE NOTHING BUT A COWARD BEHIND DARK EYEWEAR CLEARLY DESIGNED FOR WOMEN AND A PAIR OF IMPUDENT LIPS PURSED SO TIGHT IT'LL SOUND LIKE AIR SQUEALING OUT OF A BALLOON WHEN I PUNCH YOU IN THE GUT.
Pursed lips?
Karkat. No, Karkat, look at me. Do you have a little crush on all the human kids?
You do, don't you. Oh my god, you do. Just stay away from Rose, or Kanaya will chainsaw you in half.
?CG: AND JOHN, PURELY HYPOTHETICALLY, IF ONE OF US IN THE FUTURE DOES MAKE SOME SORT OF SOLICITATION YOU DON'T QUITE UNDERSTAND… ?CG: BECAUSE OF PERHAPS SOME CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ?CG: I MEAN NO ONE IN PARTICULAR HERE ?CG: MAYBE TRY TO UNDERSTAND THAT PERSON MIGHT NOT BE THINKING TOO CLEARLY AT THAT MOMENT
Karkat, you're killing me here. I'm dying. You don't get any Boondollars from killing a liveblogger, Karkat.
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