#he wants to be someone lxc knows he can rely on

[thatswhatsushesaid]

Okay, but what do ✨YOU✨ think JGY would think about LXC’s flute solo trait? 🤣

I'm experiencing deja vu, anon, because I feel like I have for sure answered an ask about this once before!! but I can't find it, woe etc.

anyway, jgy will patiently sit through as many flute solos as his er-ge feels compelled to perform, both because it is always a joy and a delight for him to listen to lxc play, and also because it's not like anyone else in lxc's life is granting him the space to express his feelings in whatever way makes him feel the most at ease!

like in all seriousness, lxc spends so much of his time and energy across all adaptations of the canon taking care of everyone else around him, and there is exactly one person in his life who makes space to provide him with support (emotional and material), both before and after he actually has the power to do so.

jgy's love language in the text consistently manifests through gift-giving (e.g., fairy for jin ling, all the presents he gives to huaisang which are tailored specifically to his interests) and acts of service (e.g., protecting and sheltering lan xichen during the war, using his newly acquired influence to secure the funds to rebuild the cloud recesses, as well as [iirc] preventing lwj from facing too much political blowback after wwx's death; literally dropping everything in the middle of hosting a banquet to help huaisang with yet another problem, etc).

so basically, imo, if what lxc needs every so often is to exorcise his own emotional demons through impromptu flute solos, there is no one in his life better equipped to understand why than jgy.

[out-there-tmblr]

I just read a modern AU fic labelled as wangxian and xiyao, except in the last quarter you get surprise murderer Meng Yao! It was not a good surprise.

I simply dont believe JGY would kill NMJ without his father's pressure and without feeling very personally threatened by NMJ.

It was one of those stories where the wangxian was so good but the take on JGY just leaves me wanting to remix it.

I can absolutely believe that JGY would fall for Xichen at first sight, even if Xichen was in a committed relationship. I can absolutely love the idea of JGY as a psychiatrist, someone clever and controlled and well-trained but also someone who is a little distrusted in social circles. I love the idea of NMJ haunting LXC, growing angrier and angrier at LXC cosying up to the man he blames for his death.

But personally I would have gone with JGY feeling morally responsible but not technically having killed him. Picture it -- JGY meeting LXC and falling hard, despite knowing he's involved with JGYs patient. JGY mentioning painkillers as a way to manage pain or listening to NMJ vent about his GP not listening to his pain needs and recommending MXY as a second opinion. JGY noticing signs of addiction and letting it slide -- JGY doubting his own instincts, wondering if his personal jealousy over LXC is colouring his view, convincing himself he should be impartial, he should believe NMJ when he says a bottle of pills were lost, when he claims a prescription was left behind when he went camping.

(JGY starting to deeply dislike NMJ, and not knowing how much of that is deserved and how much is because LXC could do so much better. JGY suspecting addiction and also trapped by patient confidentiality- he can't tell anyone without losing his license, and it's only getting worse.)

But there's a grain of truth to NMJ saying JGY told him how to find street drugs. JGY said it as an example of addiction, as a scare tactic of how NMJ will end up -- one of those junkies standing on Reynolds Rd, passed out under the bridge. It wasn't meant as an instruction.

And if I was rewriting it, I'd probably also have JGY as an untrained medium -- not naturally powerful, but strong enough that he can see NMJ. He can't hear him, but he can see NMJ yelling and screaming at him, he knows NMJ is furious at him. He knows the smart move is to leave LXC alone but instead he pastes on a smile and forces himself to ignore the ghost in the room. It's just a ghost. Ghosts fade away eventually.

He lies to LXC about it. Doesn't want to hurt him with the idea of his ex boyfriend angrily haunting him. Doesn't want LXC to ever think he has to choose between JGY and NMJ. (JGY would never ask LXC to choose between him and the love of his life; JGY knows he'd lose.) Deep down, JGY thinks he might deserve NMJs anger - he knows how unprofessional it was to reach out to a client's boyfriend. He pushed his way into LXCs life as a friend, as a source of support. He made himself useful and made sure he was always there, made sure no one else could take advantage of LXCs grief, could get their hooks into him while he was vulnerable. He made himself quietly indispensable, allowed LXC to rely on him instead of family support.

JGY knows a good person wouldn't have done that but he wanted LXC so badly. And he justifies it to himself that he would never hurt LXC and he isn't doing LXC any harm. He doesn't push for romance, he isn't demanding, and it's six months before LXC reaches for his hand during a sad moment in a movie. It's weeks after that when LXC kisses him, tender and uncertain. They take it slow and JGY never rushes LXC.

JGY cant hear NMJ so he thinks thats what NMJ is yelling about -- and he can't tell LXC without hurting him. He can't even suggest moving somewhere else because what if NMJ is haunting LXC, not the apartment? I'm sure JGY ends up doing some secretive googling or maybe getting help from an unreliable medium like Xue Yang, being told the best way to banish spectre from a house is blood magic. But he can't do that to LXCs home -- he knows how the Lans feel about blood magic, he knows LXC wouldn't want that, wouldn't forgive him if he tried it.

So when LWJ and WWX come sniffing around, when WWX can't help watching NMJs dramatics as they eat dinner, JGY panics. He tries to discredit WWX before he tells LXC, he skirts the line of violating professional ethics to relay the worst rumours he's heard about WWX. He tries to protect himself from being found out and in the process, hurts LXCs relationship with his beloved brother -- and proves to himself that he doesn't protect LXC, that he's clinging to someone he doesn't deserve.

And of course it would end with a confrontation. With LWJ and WWX telling the truth, with LXC feeling guilty that NMJ is suffering and betrayed that JGY lied to him. With JGY trying to justify himself, that he acted badly but he's been a good boyfriend to LXC, and WWX being all "Nice motive but still murder" and JGY being stunned by the accusation. Arguning that he didn't kill NMJ, he fell for his boyfriend and pursued him as soon as NMJ was dead. Why would JGY kill him when he kept refusing help for an addiction that would eventually kill him anyway?

Then I think there would be an attack from NMJ and LWJ would still probably offer himself to buy time for WWX but I think JGY would do something foolishly brave to protect LXC and WWX would save the day before anyone died.

And I think LXC would need some time alone to think things through, to come to terms with the idea of NMJ so twisted by anger, with the trauma of seeing someone he loves attack him (and hurt another person he loves), with the idea of a boyfriend who lied to him for a year but still risked his life to save LXC. I think he would be hurt and confused, but eventually he'd give JGY another chance. On the condition that JGY is honest from now on. No more lies, and in return, LXC will try to show JGY that he's not a consolation prize. LXC isn't with him because he was there, because he was convenient and had proved himself useful; that he loves JGY for his kindness and his consideration, for his patience and support, but what he needs now is JGYs trust. (And it would be uncomfortable but JGY would jump at the chance. Eventually, they'd move somewhere new and it would be happy endings all around.)

And the fact that I have definite opinions about how I would have written it shows that it was really well written in the first place. It just missed my preferred characterisation of my little meow meow.

[llycaons]

ep25 (pt 4): ships nearly passing in the night

GODD THIS SCENE IS SO FUCKING HAUNTING. the music is gorgeous, the cinematography dreamlike and surreal and symmetrical, the acting deliberate and impactful

I like that it doesn't rely on shock value for the power of this scene. there's wen qing, and there's wwx. and their courses may or may not collide. they're both wandering. wwx is drinking heavily, unwilling to play nice at the banquet and probably feeling a little abandoned by jyl. wq is bereft, hungry and alone and desperate to find her brother and utterly without hope

shots from each character's position. the audience can see the other in the distance, but they don't see each other.

I LOVE this shot. absolutely stunning and says so much. though the market is crowded with people, these are the only two that matter. will their paths cross?

wq coughs, too focused on the ground beneath her feet to notice the eye-catching and distinctive cultivator she knows so well. there's a barrier between them. wwx doesn't see wen qing's face, only the back of her hood

she's shoved down, he turns. she looks up, they see each other, allies in another life. they stare at one another for a long, long moment

they are the only two in the entire market

and just like that, everything changes

this would have been a killer romantic scene, but I absolutely adore it for what it is instead

AND AS IF THAT WASN'T ENOUGH. we end on another classic line

lwj has been weirdly distant and passive this entire episode. there are so many other characters in this episode that he did get pushed to the side, but even at the target practice he was unmoved

YEAH YOU DO

I didn't think much of this line on my first watch, because...yeah, lxc was probably right. but if you read the novel it then becomes a whole thing bc lwj DOES bring wwx-as-mxy back to CR against his will and keeps him there so there's this whole debate about lwj's 'darker urges' and whatnot that I personally find very silly? he definitely has a protective streak, and maybe even a little possessiveness, but he's never violated wwx's autonomy in cql, even when wwx was killing himself, and I never thought he ever would. or even could, actually

my preferred interpretation was that it was one of the only ways he could see to protect someone he cared about (didn't have many other role models), but he never would have acted without wwx's permission and he also felt a lot of guilt about it given his father's crimes. and you can see how he lets wwx go at the very end as well because he's not the kind of person his father was. it seems pretty mild to me, on the whole

like I see the appeal in making him a more flawed character and giving him more to overcome but I think his flaws are enough as is and fit the story perfectly already, and in cql I just don't see the evidence for him having such a powerful need to dominate or possess wwx to keep him safe. but you see a lot of meta where his desire to protect gets really tortuous and dramatic and I just don't think it's that deep.

personal highlights: WHERE TO START. this episode was THRILLING

wwx waving to jyl with his flute to make her laugh. always makes me smile

sexy sexy blindfolded archery scene

wwx remembering lxc's words and turning away but lwj leaving the narrow, straight path and coming to meet him anyway

I WILL RISE UNPARALLELED AND LEAVE YOU ALL STARING AT ME FROM BEHIND

jyl tearing jin xizun a new one and wwx crying in the background

A-XIAN IS MY DIDI

jzx's awkward confession and then flight from the clearing

the GORGEOUS gorgeous reunion scene between wwx and wq

I want to take a man to cloud recess...take him there and hide him

[robininthelabyrinth]

CQL-verse! The characters have the same age gaps between them as their actors and actresses! Wwx and Jyl are the same age, jc is 5 years younger than them. Lxc is 3 years younger than wwx&jyl and lwj is 3 years younger than him. Nmj is two years older than wwx&jyl and nhs is 8 years younger than him and the same age as lwj. (1/2)

Meng Yao is 2 years older than nhs and jzx is 2 years older than MY. I'm leaving the Wen Sibs out of this because otherwise WN would be the same age as wwx and WQ would be 4 years younger than him. But hey! If you want to go with that, go crazy! I was thinking more of Yunmeng Sibs focus, but I will be happy with anything! (2/2)

ao3

Untamed

Nie Mingjue hated the Wen sect to the point of death and war, but he had always had trouble hating sad and gentle Wen Ning.

Wen Ning was technically his peer – there were only two years between them in age – and therefore capable of the same sorts of responsibilities and duties towards righteousness as Nie Mingjue, meaning that he ought to hate him as much as all the rest. But at the same time, Wen Ning was only part of the main branch family indirectly, a ward of Wen Ruohan; he was constantly suppressed and even tormented by Wen Chao, the eldest son of that family. If anything, it seemed almost as if he’d been brought into the family just to act as the family’s scapegoat, the inferior copy that was so hapless that he made that self-indulgent hedonist Wen Chao appear somewhat competent in contrast.

Nie Mingjue couldn’t imagine treating any of his own cousins that way.

He and Wen Chao were often compared, both being about the same age, and their young brothers were of similar age as well, both of them only fourteen; this juxtaposition made sure that every single person in the cultivation world talk of them in the same breath. Nie Mingjue always came out the better in the comparison, and Wen Xu the same for his, which in the minds of most people balanced out, but which caused Wen Chao no end of rage. He knew he couldn’t take out his anger on the talented Wen Xu and so took out on poor Wen Ning instead.

Nie Mingjue hated the Wen sect.

He did not hate Wen Ning.

Wen Ning, who should not be here.

“Please,” Wen Ning said, nearly in tears, as he threw himself down to the floor in front of Nie Mingjue. He’d burst into the room in the inn Nie Mingjue was staying at, the guards that no sect leader could do without no matter what they wanted following close behind in alarm until Nie Mingjue had waved them off with a gesture; he’d been panting so hard that he’d only just now caught his breath. “Please help this useless older brother do one good thing with his life.”

Alarmed, Nie Mingjue reached out and caught Wen Ning by the shoulders, pulling him to stand and even forgetting himself enough to reach forward with a sleeve to dab away the tears staining the other man’s face.

“What is it?” he asked, feeling anxiety curdling in his gut. He’d spoken with Wen Ning before during the discussion conferences, both when he was younger and even, in a few stolen moments, after he became sect leader; he knew Wen Ning had a steady personality, if a weak one from all the bullying he endured, and that he was not given to unnecessary hysterics. If he could tolerate Wen Chao’s endless torment with a faint smile and a don’t worry sect leader Nie once you’re used to it it’s more funny than anything else, then what could make him act like this? “What is that you need help with? I do not understand.”

Wen Ning looked tired. He always had, his health had always been poor, but now it seemed worse than ever; there were circles under his eyes, and Nie Mingjue had no idea how he’d managed to get away from the Nightless City to come find him. The town he was currently in was close to the border the Qinghe Nie shared with Qishan Wen, but it was still an effort, especially for someone like Wen Ning. He might be a member of the Wen family by name, but his freedom was significantly curtailed, and it wasn’t only because he was sickly.

“My little sister is going to be attending the lectures at the Cloud Recesses,” Wen Ning said.

“The - Lan sect lectures?” Nie Mingjue repeated blankly. It was a stupid thing to say; of course it was the Lan sect’s lectures, who else would give lectures at the Cloud Recesses? And yet, at the same time – “The Wen sect hasn’t gone to them in generations.”

“Sect Leader Wen asked A-Qing to look for something,” Wen Ning said. “I don’t know what. He talks to her more than he talks to me, when she’s treating him with acupuncture and other such things – he only wants blood relations treating him now, so she’s passing along what she can do, the doctors all say she’s talented – he told her something, I think, but I don’t know what, he doesn’t talk to me…and she doesn’t talk to me, either.”

“She’s sixteen, they’re like that,” Nie Mingjue said, trying to offer comfort, but he didn’t like the sound of that – Wen Ruohan growing reliant on the medical skills of a teenager, talking with her as if she were an adult…it didn’t speak well to the Chief Cultivator’s state of mind. “So she’s going to go spy on them?”

“She is. And maybe more. There’s – there’s something back in the Nightless City, something Sect Leader Wen is refining in order to increase his power. Whatever it is, it’s powerful and evil.” Wen Ning looked paler than usual, somehow. “It was something that was kept in a cave near our village when we were younger, once. Sect Leader Wen took it away to study, and it made something go crazy, I got hurt, and my parents – anyway, it doesn’t matter. I can’t go near it without losing my senses, so I really don’t know anything about it. But I know that Sect Leader Wen only has a piece – and the Lan sect has another.”

Lan Xichen had never mentioned such a thing, but then again, he wasn’t really old enough that Nie Mingjue would expect him to know everything about his sect – he was after all a full five years younger than Nie Mingjue, three years younger than Wen Ning; he was still only seventeen, having only just graduated from his uncle’s classes the year before. He was only very technically sect leader, in the same way Nie Mingjue had only been technically sect leader after his father’s death, although unlike Lan Xichen Nie Mingjue had fought his way to step up to the task for real early on. He himself was only barely considered an adult at the age of twenty-two; it was no surprise that in the Lan sect, which had Lan Qiren to rely on, Lan Xichen might not know it all.

Or perhaps he knew, and simply didn’t say. Each sect was entitled to its secrets.

“What are you thinking?” Nie Mingjue asked.

“I’m thinking that my sister is constantly afraid for me, even though she’s younger than me,” Wen Ning said solemnly. “I’m thinking that she will break her own principles into pieces to protect me. I’m thinking that she’ll find whatever it is, or find a hint to it, and then Wen Chao will take his forces to burn the Cloud Recesses to the ground in search of it.”

Nie Mingjue could see that.

He didn’t want to, but he could.

“My brother is attending those lectures,” he said blankly. Nie Huaisang was there right now. He could be in danger – no, he would be in danger. Nie Huaisang wasn’t a good cultivator, and at fourteen, he was just a baby. Nie Mingjue had sent Meng Yao with him, nominally as his attendant, but in fact to get the benefit of the classes himself and also bully Nie Huaisang into actually learning something – he’d brought Meng Yao into the Nie sect after Jin Zixuan, full of guilt over how his father had treated a boy only two years his junior, had sent him a letter beseeching him for help following Meng Yao’s public and humiliating rejection from Jinlin Tower – but Meng Yao was only sixteen, of age with Wen Qing; what could he really do?

Moreover, sending Wen Qing and not Wen Xu, even though Wen Xu was the same age as Nie Huaisang and Lan Wangji, indicated that Wen Ruohan didn’t want his more promising son to get involved in whatever it was that he was planning, or maybe in whatever consequences followed. If Wen Chao really were to try something violent, they couldn’t afford to have a weakness already there…

“I need to get A-Qing out of the Wen sect,” Wen Ning said, and Nie Mingjue turned to look at him in shock. “Permanently. I’ve begged her to go, but she won’t leave me, she won’t leave our family of the Dafan Wen, but she has to. Something bad is going to happen soon. I know it. I don’t mind trading my life for hers, but she has to live.”

“Is there any way you can go to the Cloud Recesses as well?” Nie Mingjue asked, his mind already racing. He’d long ago given up on helping Wen Ning because he knew the other man wouldn’t turn traitor against his family, being an upright and filial child, but if his family had reached such a depth of corruption as that, then it was only right to leave them behind. If Wen Ning was finally accepting that, maybe there was something he could do. “You’re sensitive to the – whatever it is. Right? Maybe Wen Qing can suggest bringing you around to help her find her way to it.”

“How would that help?”

“It gets you somewhere safe, while I can rescue Dafan Wen – without a threat to you or to them, your sister would have no reason to insist on staying,” Nie Mingjue said, though it wouldn’t be him, exactly, that did the rescue – he’d need a firm alibi lest Wen Ruohan use it as an excuse to start something with his Nie sect. He might have prepared for war as much as he could, but the Wen sect was still stronger; if war broke out, he needed to make sure that he had the moral high ground.

Luckily, Wei Wuxian, that walking calamity of a head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang, had of late developed the habit of wandering over to visit various other sects, including Qinghe (and Nie Mingjue in specific), at his leisure, and no one ever would think to blame him for such a strange thing as a subsidiary sect of distant Wen sect cousins disappearing.

After all, Wei Wuxian had no reason to know or care about the Dafan Wen, and everyone knew he abjured politics completely, violently and repetitively, so as to make no mistake about anyone who might otherwise see him as competition for the Jiang sect’s true heir, Jiang Cheng. The five-year gap between their ages kept them from being compared – you couldn’t expect a child, and at fifteen Jiang Cheng was still very much a child, to keep up with an adult just turned twenty like Wei Wuxian – but there had always been whispers given everything with Cangse Sanren, and Wei Wuxian had had to work very hard to put a stop to them.

Wei Wuxian’s wandering habit had started back when he’d been trying to find Jiang Yanli a new fiancée to replace the engagement he’d broken by fighting with Jin Zixuan, however shameful it was for him to fight with a boy two years his junior. It was for that that he had come to Qinghe to meet Nie Mingjue, leading to them hitting it off as friends despite Nie Mingjue expressing that he had absolutely no interest in getting married to Jiang Yanli, or indeed to any nice young lady at all; then, in turn, Nie Mingjue had brought him to the Lan sect to meet Lan Xichen. They’d gotten along as well, although the most notable outcome of that visit had been little Lan Wangji developing a crush on his elder brother’s new friend while Wei Wuxian remained blissfully oblivious. His wanderings had continued even after Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan had found their way back to each other, affianced once again through their own choice rather than their parents’.

Said parents had not yet been informed of this new situation, as they were waiting for the right time to mention it. Or perhaps more accurately, the right situation to exploit with it…

Now, Nie Mingjue thought. Now was the time. It would work perfectly.

And not just as a distraction.

“Are you sure…?”

“I am,” Nie Mingjue said. “Whatever it is, Wen Ruohan must be kept from obtaining all of the pieces; he’s already too powerful, and more power will only make him more arrogant. I’ll speak with Lan Qiren. Once I take the Dafan Wen back to the Nie sect, your sister will be able to testify to whatever it is that she was asked to search for, which will give Lan Qiren the evidence he needs to get his sect’s approval for retaliatory measures. Moreover, using Wei Wuxian to help me will force Jiang Fengmian to support me as well; there’s no way he’d ever refuse to back him to the hilt.”

“The Jin sect –”

“Will join us,” Nie Mingjue said, thinking of Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan’s yet-to-be-announced engagement. Once Jin Guangshan realized that he would be pulled into the same boat as the rest of them whether he wanted to or not, any resistance he had would crumble like a structure made of sand being beaten down by the tide. “They won’t have a choice. Is there anything else I should know?”

“There’s a child,” Wen Ning said, biting his lips. “Around the same age as your brother or my sister, or maybe the Jiang sect heir, I don’t know, around that. He helps Sect Leader Wen with whatever he’s doing.”

“A child helps him?”

Nie Mingjue didn’t like the sound of that.

“I don’t know. Some secret his family knows, I think…his surname is Xue.”

Nie Mingjue frowned.

“I don’t know much about him,” Wen Ning added. “Only that he has some history with the Yueyang Chang clan. Bad history.”

“That’s a good start,” Nie Mingjue said. He realized that he hadn’t yet released Wen Ning’s shoulders, and gave them a small squeeze before doing so. “Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I will do everything I can to help you.”

Wen Ning looked at him with admiration in his eyes, making Nie Mingjue feel a little hot under the collar.

“Thank you, Chifeng-zun,” he murmured, and Nie Mingjue shook his head.

“Call me by name,” he said, and tried to smile. “You’ll be here a lot in the future, if all goes well.”

Nie Mingjue hated the Wen sect, but he didn’t hate gentle and sad Wen Ning.

He didn’t hate him at all.

[fixielixie]

(because I love nielan too) nielan for the ship it/don't ship it questions

❤nielan❤ Ship It

What made you ship it?

look you have me at 'preppy smiley guy' and 'gruff and stern guy'. like what a fun dynamic. also i saw some art of nielan (donghua character designs) and was like YES THIS PLEASE. i think i first read it as a background thing in a fic and i was like hmm inch resting and the more i thought about it the more i liked it. just... so good. deserves so much more love

What are your favorite things about the ship?

probably their character dynamics. i love characters that balance each other out and can bring sides out of each other that they might never have explored before and i feel like nielan have so much potential. also they are the older brothers, the clan heirs and then sect leaders, i feel like they could really rely on each other.

i love the concept of the nie and lan clans holding meetings for the kids to build better relation and nmj and lxc immediately hitting it off because like... who else can understand both the stress of looking after your younger sibling and also the expectations of of being the heir. maybe it was a little rocky at the start bc nmj thinks lxc is two faced, who could be that nice and smiley all the time, before realising that lxc allows himself to be softer, doesnt want to be harden with age or his position. that he makes a conscious effort to be nice because very few people bother now-a-days. and that a big part of the reason why he is the way he is is for his brother. and like, that mind blowing to nmj because ...,, thats why he acts like he does. he shows off how strong he is all the time because he knows his brother is weaker, is not interesting in fighting and is probably never going to be a strong cultivator so he needs to be that for him, so no one can beat nhs down.

also just to be cliche, the thought of the huge stern buff guy having such a soft spot for his partner. like one second hes beating the shit out of someone and the next hes giving lxc a peck on the cheek bc he just shows up to the unclean realm for a visit and walked into the practice pitch. or the opposite with lxc dropping his smile for someone whos talking shit about the nies and their sect leader, letting them have it. maybe throwing a few punches.

ahhhh nmj being the first one to get lxc drunk and having to deal with a clingy and giggling tipsy lxc hanging off of him (lxc is defo one of those 'do you know how much i love you' drunks). and nmj baring it while blushing fiercely and when lxc teases him about his red cheeks he blames it on the alcohol.

..... im getting ahead of myself skdhfdjkg

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

my unpopular opinion is that it should be more popular. especially because i personally think that the lxc ships are so lacking. like if youre gonna ship this side character with anyone, why not the guy whom he still actually likes and has always liked??? (will never get the popularity of xicheng makes me want to scream. JIANG CHENG DOES NOT DESERVE A LAN BOY!!!!!!!!)

[xiyao-feels]

@hqfeels

Oh man, as someone who loves 3zun, and thinks the mess of intertwining relationships is what makes it interesting, I really should not have read this post - while I think you make some interesting points for a different interpretation of the Nielan relationship, I would also caution against basing your interpretation so closely to the words of what is a translation

e.g. when you discuss LXC not framing things in terms of the sworn brother relationship, you point to the use of “one of his sworn brothers” vs “my” or “our” - chinese doesn’t always use pronouns, so it could very well be the translator having to fill in

I make note of this, not as a nitpick, but bc I think it goes to the heart of the framing of the relationship. Because I think Xiyao is fundamentally framed within the 3zun context - after all, what does JGY call LXC to show they’re close? Er-ge. “2”, not just Ge. NMJ, as Da-ge eternally haunts their relationship. The point of rejection from LXC? You don’t have to call me Er-ge anymore.

So, hey! I appreciate that you said you shouldn't have read my post, but I thought your points were worth addressing, and since you left comments in the notes I figured it was reasonable to respond. If you don't want to read this post, I completely understand, and I've left a bunch of empty lines after this paragraph so you don't have to read it if you don't want to.

The point about relying too heavily on exact shades of meaning is definitely a good one. Reading over my post, however, I think there are only three places where I do that; the point identified, later for one point in my discussion of QHJ's teacher, and actually later in the temple when I talk about the "sob" of Liebing as some evidence for LXC's grief for NMJ.

I think it's worth asking: how much does any one of these points contribute to the argument? They're definitely not irrelevant, or I wouldn't have pointed them out, but even so there's only so much wiggle room. No matter what pronouns he uses, for example, LXC only spends one clause of that speech directly on JGY killing NMJ, and it's in the context of, well, a general lack of reaction of personal grief. If—not even if he actually said 'our sworn brother' or 'my sworn brother,' I do think that would be some evidence of personal betrayal, even if it has to be considered in light of the rest of his reactions and non-reactions. But if, in the original text, the Chinese simply didn't specify the pronouns such that "his" is the translator's best guess—I just don't see that as a serious blow to the argument, given the consistency of the pattern as a whole, and I think it's kind of cherry-picking to suggest that it is.

Second, I don't think the pronoun there is ambiguous as is suggested. Consider the phrasing; it's not just "his sworn brother," it's "one of his sworn brothers." Supposing that "his" wasn't present in the original text. "One of my sworn brothers"? "One of our sworn brothers"? Neither really makes sense. Of course, perhaps they might make more sense in Chinese; but that's a little further than "what if the translator had to pick a pronoun."

Now, I think the above points are worth considering on their own merits, which is why I brought them up first. However, I have to say: I did, actually, check the Chinese, for the "one of his sworn brothers" and indeed in multiple places. I didn't mention it in the post for the same reason I usually try not to rely on it in my posts: because I feel like I'd end up setting myself up as some kind of authority when I'm very much not, and because I'm frequently fairly confused XP I have, what, one term of Mandarin, some amount of self-study, and Pleco installed on my phone. But I do often look at the original text and try to work things out, and sometimes I learn stuff that's been lost in translation, and often I can go well, my best guess aligns with the translation. If you want to confirm for yourself, and I encourage you to do so!!, then you can look at the text here: https://www.kunnu.com/modaozushi/. It's in chapter 64.

This is the clause about JGY killing one of his sworn brothers: 他设计杀害了自己的一位义兄 ("that he planned to kill one of his sworn brothers"). The pronoun before "one of his sworn brothers" is 自己, which is a pronoun referring to the subject of the sentence—in this case 他, he, JGY. Now, could I be wrong? Of course! Should anyone rely on uncited statements from a total stranger? No! I strongly encourage people to check this out for themselves, and if someone who actually does speak Chinese wants to offer some guidance I'd be very grateful. But given that it matched the translation from people who do actually speak both Chinese and English, it seemed enough to allow me to rely on the translation.

On that note, actually, I'll admit I missed a trick. "我父亲的一位恩师", one of my father's teachers—"teacher" there is 恩师, which Pleco gives me as "mentor; one's kind and respected master (or teacher)." So it does have more of an emotional edge, and I'll edit the post to acknowledge this. Even so, I think it's worth remembering both that it's one word, he's not adding lots of adjectives about the teacher, and most importantly that the teacher simply isn't lingered on. The effects of his mother killing the teacher, yes, and the contrast between his memories of his mother and the fact that she did kill his father's teacher...but the teacher himself is just not dwelled on.

(For completion's sake, the "sob" of Liebing in ch 107 is "呜咽", which Pleco gives as 1) sob, whimper 2) (of water, wind, stringed instrument, etc) weep; wail; lament; mourn.)

But again, quibbling over phrasing is to some extent a distraction. The important thing is not so much any one incident as the pattern they form, considered together; this is why my original post was so long, because I was trying to consider the overall pattern, and I think the comment about framing is pointing at the same thing. So it's worth asking: are xi//yao framed in terms of the 3//zun relationship?

In fact, I think this divides into two questions. First: does the text frame xi//yao in terms of the 3//zun relationship? And second: do xi//yao understand their relationship fundamentally in terms of the 3//zun relationship? I think you could make more of an argument on the first one, or at least, xi//yao and NMJ are part of their own narrative in the text and often show up together. But in terms of the actual relationship, it's the second question I'm interested in here, and I think the answer is very much no.

First of all, a note on timelines. In MDZS, LXC and JGY knew each other for about seventeen years; they were sworn brothers with NMJ for about four. To put this another way, they were sworn brothers with NMJ for less than a quarter of their overall time together. Moreover, they had significant time without NMJ before they all became sworn brothers, as well as after his death. Now, much of their relationship is revealed to us through Empathy, which necessarily limits us to when NMJ was alive, and moreover shows us only those of their moments together that he happens to see, so it's understandable that these years dominate our view, but I do think it's important to remember.

Okay, now let's consider what we see of their relationship. Given how much of it we see through NMJ's eyes, it's in fact remarkable how much it isn't about him. In the first conversation we see them have together, LXC is proposing that MY stop being NMJ's deputy and go serve his father in Langya (though only after confirming that's still what MY wants, note—and which he knows MY had wanted because MY literally told him!). When MY says he does want it but he owes NMJ, LXC says he thinks NMJ will understand but volunteers to talk with NMJ himself if he doesn't. Neither of them have told NMJ they know each other; after NMJ comes in, when he seeks to find out how they do, asking LXC and then ordering MY to speak after LXC refuses, they don't tell him. I'm not saying either of them are unhappy with NMJ here—quite the contrary!—but there's no sign they see the other, or their relationship with each other, fundamentally in terms of him. (For a close reading of the scene, as ever, I recommend confusion-and-more's post here.)

Furthermore, in MDZS, after MY flees from NMJ in Langya and becomes a spy, he starts sending LXC letters with information, and LXC works out who it is. As with pretty much everything we see about them, this suggests a quite astonishing intimacy—that MY was able to trust that LXC would work it out, and that LXC did. Not only did NMJ not know who the spy was, in MDZS he didn't know there was a spy at all—LXC concealed it from him entirely. Now, this is obviously very solid practice for spies, but again—you have xiyao together, and NMJ apart. (I'll also note that in MDZS LXC is exchanging blows with NMJ sword to saber until the very end of the post-Sun Palace confrontation, even after MY steps forward; he definitely does not seem to think that NMJ has any sort of right, here.)

At the Phoenix Mountain Hunt, we see them together but, again, not with NMJ, and there's no suggestion that LXC had socialized with him particularly—JGY is aware of how much prey he's taken, but of course JGY is running the hunt. Then when they both go off at the end of the scene to expand the hunting grounds, LXC asks LWJ if he'd like to help, but there's zero suggestion that they're going to seek out NMJ, even though he's part of the reason JGY needs to expand the hunting grounds.

In chapter 73, LXC and JGY are talking after the conference. Then NMJ comes over and comments disapprovingly about JGY. Again, LXC doesn't actually speak a single word after NMJ joins them. This... really does not suggest perceiving him and JGY as fundamentally part of that triad, imho.

The guqin scene: LXC and JGY are very much focused on each other. Only LXC talks with NMJ at all, and only once, briefly, answering his objection. NMJ is described as looking up before his objection, which suggests to me that he/wasn't/ looking up before. Meanwhile LXC and JGY are complimenting each other's playing, LXC is offering to teach him exclusive teachings, and JGY is telling LXC about his mother. You could reasonably say LXC teaching JGY the Song of Clarity is or is partly about NMJ—his desire again for them to reconcile—but in their interactions they are focused on each other to an almost absurd extent, and not NMJ.

The discussion conference mentioned in chapter 30? We're told NMJ wasn't originally planning to go; it seems likely that we would have been told if the same was true of LXC, given that LWJ is the one telling us about it. So, again, we have JGY and LXC together, and NMJ only coming in for outside reasons.

At the beginning of the stairs conflict, when NMJ comes in and calls JGY out, we see that JGY and LXC are discussing something, with "notes of all colours" on the desk before them. WWX is later going to realize they're discussing the watchtowers, which even now, well before he's Jin-zongzhu, JGY is trying to convince his father to build; there's no sign, on the other hand, that NMJ even knows what they're working on.

Their last interaction before NMJ's death /is/ about NMJ, with JGY very upset and LXC defending the idea that NMJ hasn't rejected JGY completely. But again this doesn't suggest that they view their relationship fundamentally in terms of their relationship with NMJ, and as we've seen it's not what they're usually talking about.

I talk here about two patterns of 3//zun interaction in the Empathy chapters: broadly, MY/JGY and LXC talking privately and NMJ coming and interrupting them, and NMJ attacking MY/JGY, and LXC intervening.

Looking over their interactions, the text does not, to me, suggest that LXC and JGYview their relationship fundamentally in terms of NMJ or of 3//zun.

And again—LXC doesn't bring up NMJ in the temple, and he only reacts to NMJ-as-NMJ three brief times.

Now, it is of course true that JGY calls LXC er-ge as a sign of closeness, and that he's 'er-ge' because NMJ is the first brother. However, a few points.

First, I would argue that it's a recurring theme in MDZS (and /especially/ for JGY) that the form of a relationship doesn't necessarily match what the relationship actually is; the form, therefore, might be an interesting point to consider, but it must be considered in light of the evidence we have about their actual relationship.

Second, JGY calls LXC er-ge a full thirteen times in the temple chapters. Once in chapter 99, when he's responding to LXC about JL; twice in chapter 100, discussing NHS; in chapter 105, three times leading up to his explanation of the letter; six full times when answering LXC's questions in chapter 106; and then once in chapter 108 when he is literally asking LXC for protection from NMJ's fierce corpse.

Once and only once, on the last er-ge in chapter 105, does LXC respond to being called er-ge, though we're told he did so earlier off-page. And—well, look at the paragraph:

His tone was more than earnest. Ever since he captured Lan XiChen, he’d indeed been treating him with respect. At this point, Lan XiChen wasn’t able to turn against him yet. He could only sigh, “Sect Leader Jin, I have already said, when you went your own way to scheme such havoc at Burial Mound, that there was no longer the need to call me ‘Brother.’”

This is not only not framed as an essential rejection, it's framed as explicitly /not/ that: "Lan XiChen wasn't able to turn against him yet." And again, as I pointed out in my post, we're explicitly given a reason for it that has absolutely nothing to do with NMJ! 'Don't call me er-ge because you killed da-ge' would be very natural; the fact that it's explicitly not about that suggests strongly to me that they simply don't think of 'er-ge' in terms of its relation to NMJ, despite the form.

[guqin-and-flute]

Very Important Question: in the 3zun dads au, does Jingyi ever get a younger sibling? Aka I want to see him being an older brother, hopefully with a sister because girls are way underrepresented in mdzs/cql 'verses.

This is indeed a Very Important Question! THIS ANSWER GOT WAY LONGER THAN I ANTICIPATED AND I RAMBLED, so I’m gonna put

TL;DR-- I AM WITH YOU in that I would LOVE it if they had another child (especially a daughter ;-;) and A-Fu got to be a big brother! But I gotta get to know the ending boys and their dynamics better before I mess that far in the future because writing is weird and characters are willful 😂 Hard Maybe (that’s really a soft Yes because they would love it.)

And if anyone wants to read my musings/reasoning it is here ⬇ ⬇ ⬇

Currently, with where we are temporally, I don’t think they have any plans to do so--adopting Jingyi was ...unplanned? On the night Xichen meets him, he’s not exactly thinking straight and is sort of running on pain and The Next Right Thing He Can Do and ends up falling asleep on the floor next to LWJ with A-Yuan and A-Fu. Since things are in such disarray and all the Juniors were relieved of child watching duties and further plans still need to be made to re-allocate orphans, he just sort of...ends up carrying him around the next day as he’s going around making decisions etc. (!!Papoose!!) And, of course, A-Fu falls asleep on him again around bedtime, and seems cruel to have him wake up in a different place with different people all disoriented after everything that’s happened, so Xichen keeps him another night. 

And then when the logical time arrives to settle him with a new family or in the impromptu group home the Lan have set up, doing that seems...absolutely insane. Impossibly painful. To the point where it feels like someone is actually trying to rip a body part from him. And A-Fu starts to scream literally every time he tries to put him down or have someone else hold him for a moment. And so Xichen comes to the startling realization that he’s a father, now. He hopes his partners don’t mind. He knows this should be a group decision but, uh, this wasn’t exactly...planned. 

If they were going to have another child--which I don’t think any of them are necessarily opposed to, individually!--it would be when they have worked things out between them and fully become 3zun again. Raising a kid with all of them has made it obvious that the way their relationship was working before wasn’t actually Working, it was just sort of a holding pattern they had managed to create and not look at too hard. They are all aware that it’s not ideal, as a relationship or for being parents but they all feel sort of deadlocked in the way that it is right now (which is why we gotta shake ‘em up >:] ). 

And, in a weird way, where the story is currently, they have yet to acknowledge the permanence of their arrangement? None of them have any plans to end it, but it’s sort of one of those things where they don’t really talk about the future all that much, they take things as they come. A-Fu goes around telling people that they are all his dad’s, but Jin Guangyao is...in a very weird headspace for much of A-Fu’s childhood, as we find out. And Lan Xichen is dealing with his own pressures. Nie Mingjue has the least problem with being open about it, but none of them are Official in an open way. Yes, yes, between all of them and their close family members they trust, of course they are all A-Fu’s father’s and are partners to each other, but if someone were to be incredibly rude and point blank in a public venue grill Xichen or JGY about the nature of this relationship, the responses would be...cagey at best. And they would be very uncomfortable.

I tend to TRY to be a more chronological writer for big plot point things because, while I do a lot of planning and what ifs in AUs that are really freeform and being built by prompts/the community (which is fun as HELL), in a structured story line, there have definitely been times where characters have looked at plot points when we come to them, snorted and said 'yeah uh no. we're not doing that' and surprised the hell out of me by doing something completely different than what I expected (I’m looking at you, JGY). So I wanna give space for them to develop naturally because there usually ends up being a reason for it that I find later, and if I try to force characters to do things they don’t wanna do, it literally never ends well. So if anything like that were to happen during the story, I wouldn’t want to miss out on the repercussions of it by jumping too far ahead in a story line that relies heavily on character development and realizations!

THAT BEING SAID. They all love children and the MDZS verse is just...fuckin chock full of orphans. So I’m positive that, once things settle down in their relationship and they get more stable in their positions with each other (JGY and NMJ) and in their Clans (JGY) and in themselves (JGY and LXC), they would love to have another child--with a bit more planning, this time.

[a-very-fond-farewell]

The forbidden crack! Untamed prompts: 19/?

Wedding Planner AU [xicheng edition]: “Chickens on the Loose”

[let me have this]

Jiang Cheng doesn’t believe in love and that’s precisely the reason why he plans other people’s special day. The most extravagant, the boldest, the loudest, the better. Because if there’s something he got to accept over the years is that people aren’t willing to pay for something realistic, but for something unattainable instead. Over-compensating bland, ordinary reality with fantasy and dreams is his job and he’s well aware that no one can compete with his genius. Not with his father owning a catering and food chain company. Not with his mother being the most sought out wedding gown fashion designer on the market. They taught him everything there is to know on how to make other people’s dream come true before the inevitable envelope of a dainty, innocuous divorce application can make its way in a once happy household. Better make the satisfaction last, because Jiang Cheng will only accept advanced payments in cash, no monthly installments allowed.

His sister YanLi may have married honoring tradition over useless exaggeration, but what did her love bring aside from suffering and neglect? Marrying into the richest family in the country to the heir of a textile empire has given her nothing but sorrow and a husband too proud and distant to even visit her regularly. Jin Ling growing up without a father, spoiled rotten by the wrong side of the family who lured him into their shining world of nothingness day after day. At least Jiang Cheng’s family did rise from nothing and learned to trick the rich into relying on useless services soon enough. But Jin ZiXuan and his family had never worked once in their life and didn’t know how to take care of their loved ones. Not that Jiang Cheng’s parents could do any better, their marriage a wasteland where no love could grow, but at least they were honest about it. Better enjoy a dream while it lasts.

That is why if even Wei Ying’s marriage were to turn out to utter shit like YanLi’s, at least it will not be Jiang Cheng’s fault. Everything needs to be perfect, from the vows to the tea ceremony, from the food to the color scheme, from the seat arrangements to the music. Hell, some of his stepbrother’s requests may be too much to handle for most, but not for Jiang Cheng and if Wei Ying wants a parade and a whole week worth of celebrations, Wei Ying will have exactly that.

Hence he will not, under any circumstance, allow anyone snooping around as he plans the wedding of the century. No, not even the fiancée’s overprotective older brother asking people for blackmailing material on Wei Ying behind Jiang Cheng’s back. Not even if he pays him in nature, no ma’am.

... . ... . ... . ...

Lan Huan is the best divorce attorney in town precisely because he believes in unconditional love. That’s why he doesn’t see the point of two people (or three people, on one memorable case in Europe) spending the rest of their life together if change is inevitable and something to be expected. He would much prefer to get the best deal out of it for his clients and prevent children to suffer from it in the process.

Judges fear him and his diplomatic smile that can never hide his tunnel vision drive for victory. His trusty private investigator Nie HuaiSang is equally terrified by his assets, but still feeds him with the juiciest details whenever Lan Huan asks for favors, discreetly requesting the younger man to do background checks on this or that subject. Settlements may be nice, but not if the (soon to be ex) husband or wife in question can be easily found guilty of adultery, gaslighting, or even violence. Not on Lan Huan’s watch.

That’s why his world gets completely turned over the moment his younger brother Lan Zhan announces his intention to marry a man he hasn’t known for a full three months yet. Truth to be told, Lan Huan had never seen him this happy: glowing with something akin to adoration, affection dripping from every pore, love spilling all over just by mentioning one name, Wei Ying. In case this rascal happens to crush his precious baby brother’s heart, Lan Huan needs to find dirt on this man and squeeze everything he has out of his dead cold hands the second his brother files a request for a divorce.

But for some reason Nie HuaiSang cannot seem to be found for the job this time around. Not unlike most of his other contacts and informants, who have seemingly disappeared at the mention of his brother’s fiancee’s name. If this Wei Ying is such a big fish in the sea to make even Lan Huan’s most loyal colleagues dissolve into thin air, then he must find the answers by himself.

And if it means to bomb the wedding preparations to get shit done, oh he will. He’s not above flirting to get what he wants, but if this Wei Ying turns out to be a good person in the end... well. Lan Huan prays things won’t get too messy to proceed with the celebrations in the end. Hopefully, that is.

[fun stuff under the cut.]

NHS went to uni with Wei Ying and he knows LXC won’t find anything on him bc WWX himself is a blackmail master and will 100% diss you in front of your children calling you out on your deepest secrets so no. NHS will not mess with that and he urges to do as much to all LXC’s informants and sources.

JC looks scary but his staff loves how dedicated he is and they make bets on when he’s going to lose it and sleep with someone out of frustration. although they think he gets more turned on by going over every point in his check-lists at times...

LXC’s colleague always ask him if he’s dating anyone, clearly to set him up with someone (who will not be of LXC’s liking, he’s sure). to which he answers by smiling and lying saying he has a terrible personality. since nobody believes him, he asked his friend Meng Yao to make a scene at the firm once: (all too pleased to mess with his bestie’s reputation) Meng Yao murder-walked into the office and demanded to meet LXC, only to cry in front of everyone and smack him across the face for cheating on him. THEN his sister A-Su made her sudden appearance and smacked LXC’s other cheek lamenting the same, ridiculous thing. the two siblings gaped in fake horror at each other before spitting on LXC and storming off of the building.

NMJ laughed his ass off for weeks after the sharade. he started dating A-Su not long after (with both JGY and LXC’s blessings) bc he was mildly impressed by her willingness to jump on the opportunity to make a fool of both LXC and her brother at once. LXC thinks they are a good match, but he worries A-Su might be too tiny and full of undiluted mischief for NMJ to be able to handle her antics.

NMJ used to date LXC, but they were too driven and competitive to let their relationship get in the way and in the end they stopped seeing each other. they still care deeply for one another, but they love their jobs at the firm too much and making things messy at the office wasn’t worth it. A-Su knows about it and doesn’t feel left out because of it, glad that they settled into their respective lives while still being loyal friends to each other.

JGY tries to set LXC up with a new woman every week, saying he would benefit from having a cute wife taking care of him. but LXC doesn’t know what business JGY has to talk about women that way when Meng Yao’s been a raging homosexual since the first time he has landed his eyes on another boy in kindergarten. too many crushes on boys to even be aware of how many hearts he has broken in his life. all those pretty girls falling for his looks, poor kids. only JGY’s younger brother Mo XuanYu could rival his victim count, but barely so.

ZiXuan is secretly keeping an eye on his half-brothers and half-sister while he works as a representative for his family company and this is mainly the reason why he has distanced himself from YanLi and Jin Ling in these past few years. he would like to approach his three half-siblings and maybe have a chance to rekindle lost relationships, but by stressing over it he is losing sight of the found family he actually has. YanLi wants him to come around, eventually, but she knows how lonely ZiXuan has been with no siblings and how secretly jealous he is of the bond that she has with her family. so she won’t pressure her husband, but she feels lonely nonetheless.

the two wangxian lovebirds are too happy to notice the mess LXC is making and they don’t even realize he’s there until like, three days before the actual wedding.

LXC may be a shark but he’s not subtle. JC doesn’t know what he does for a living but he assumes he has too much time on his hands, hence not someone worthy of his time. but LXC always causes troubles on the venue or messes up with the flower arrangements or prods for information to the wrong people and JC is over it.

“if you don’t have anything better to do help me find the sommelier so I can ask him what’s wrong with him and if he studied anything at all” or “if you have so much time to waste be useful and learn how to make flower crowns for the children to play with” or “if you can sit on your ass all day at least look over my nephew while I go look for someone to emotionally bully to let off some steam.”

Jin Ling is five and even more bossy than his uncle and orders LXC around to be his pony when JC should babysit him at work. LXC discovers the boy is JGY and A-Su and Mo XuanYu’s nephew and that JC doesn’t what any of them to interact with Jin Ling. but LXC secretly lets them hang out with the boy when JC is too busy to notice.

JC and LXC get closer the more the latter understands that there’s not much dirt on Wei Ying (aside from some questionable pictures taken during a university party back in the days, but that’s beside the point). LXC appreciates how crafty and ingenious JC is, always helping others around instead of just shouting orders...even if his temper is atrocious at times.

JC forces LXC to take dance lessons with the lot of the main family members and LXC meets JC’s mother for the first time. she is competitive about her dancing skills and Wei Ying tries to win her over by asking her to show everybody how it’s done by leading her ex-husband in a tango. after publicly humiliating her ex-husband (and making him fall in love with her once more), she insists on practicing a waltz with LXC and basically threatens him to cut off his balls if he dares to lead JC on with his charms.

LXC realizes he’s been playing and flirting too much with the man for him not to notice, but JC seems oblivious. no. he’s completely oblivious and kind and beautiful as he dances with Jin Ling and twirls him around in delight. LXC played too hard and now he’s in too deep.

the only source of drama in this would be JC finding out LXC let Jin Ling hang out with his other uncles and aunt despite the warnings. JC was starting to trust the man... and LXC stabbed him in the back. he would have much preferred not to discover it from his nephew (who let it slip that LXC “told him not to speak of his uncles and aunt to Jiujiu”), because he would have given LXC a chance to explain himself otherwise. but no. JC cannot have good things apparently and now he’s heartbroken without even knowing why.

without the lucky charm that is JC (holed up in his flat eating junk food to forget the pain of being an afterthought in other people’s lives), everything goes to shit three days before the wedding: the chef quits, the tea set for the ceremony breaks, one of the maids has accidentally torn apart one set of wedding robes and so on.

the venue gets flooded with live chickens when a truck transporting them breaks down in front of the building and the chicken escape. Jin Ling is loving every second of it, but everything gets destroyed in the ruckus and JC’s hard work is ruined.

Wei Ying is heartbroken and Lan Zhan silently accuses LXC of being the cause of this and urges him to fix the mess unless he wants to receive the cold shoulder for the rest of his days. but LXC is a cowards and spends his time actually fixing the broken things or replacing them or finding seamstresses to help with the garments and so on himself. anything but facing JC and be rejected.

ZiXuan comes to his senses and blurts out that “he really just wanted to have a loving family” the moment JGY, A-Su and Mo XuanYu come check on LXC. they hug and cry and laugh and YanLi gently reminds them that this is not about them right now and that they should help with the preparations if they have so much time on their hands. her mother is very proud of her and nods appreciatively at ZiXuan’s shocked and weirdly intrigued expression after being humiliated so boldly in front of everyone. the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree indeed.

the day before the wedding Wei Ying threatens to call the wedding off if JC doesn’t show up for his big day: not because he’s the planner, but because Wei Ying wants him close on his happiest day and he will not have it any other way.

LXC goes to fetch JC in his apartment himself the night before the wedding and they yell and they make peace and then they make love and then they woke up late the next day and they have to rush to the venue.

Wei Ying is livid until JC appears and then they celebrate the wedding of the century. A week of celebrations later Lan Zhan deadpans that they actually got married already like, one month in after meeting each other, but Wei Ying wanted a big wedding and he didn’t want to deny his husband a single thing.

JC tries to strangle his brother as the last family picture is being taken.

give me an award already.

[allmydokkuns]

Every night in my head there's a regularly scheduled free-for-all about which MDZS sibling group gets center stage and tonight it's not the 5-way poly sworn brothers AU fix-it... For once.

Uhh also spoilers for character deaths if y'all somehow reading this and haven't been spoiled on the quite extensive list of deceased named characters in MDZS, and also for most major plot points. I still don't know how to do a "read more" on mobile so here we are, I guess.

So tonight we're having feelings about the fact that Jiang Yanli threw her life and future raising her only child away for Wei Wuxian, who ended up dying anyway. So there's the argument there that she did it for nothing, since it's her death that was the last straw for WWX if I remember right. I'm basing this mostly on what I remember from CQL of course, but no matter which version (novel or live), Jiang Cheng is still the last one left, and he's still present at the moment of WWX's death.

I guess what's interesting for me here is it brings up the question of how their sibling dynamic functions: did JYL do it because she's the older sibling and she couldn't have done otherwise? Would she have still done it if Zixuan was still alive, or if Jiang Cheng had predeceased her? Did she think at all about how taking that sword would mean leaving behind her brother and her son?

Lately I've been thinking a lot about how her death parallels the Guanyin temple scene and it hurts me a lot tbh

Sibling takes a blade that wasn't meant for them/a blade provoked by someone else,

While a brother is present and is in shock at what has just occurred.

While yet another brother is also there and is the ultimate cause of first sibling's death, and meets their end quite soon after that

Leaving behind a brother to pick up the pieces in the aftermath.

So while I don't want Yunmeng sibling trio to mirror in part the Venerated Triad, I also can't say that the parallels don't exist... Also *clenches fist* the bitter aftertaste of both Jiang siblings sacrificing themselves for the same person and being repaid in the exact same, even though none of them knew it at the time...

Also if you want to have a lot of feelings about Yunmeng sibs go have a listen at both Yanli's and Jiang Cheng's CQL character themes, and cry a lot at the fact that the flute in her song sounds like WWX while it's completely missing from Jiang Cheng's. I have a very hard time believing that Yanli's song isn't speaking to Jiang Cheng directly and y'all can fight me.

Also can we appreciate how in these two plot points how Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng kind of... resonate, for lack of a better word? When faced with a choice between outliving his sworn brothers, both of whom can be said to have died because of his faith in someone else's words, and dying with the, LXC only survives because JGY pushes him away before NMJ kills him. He has the privilege of making that choice because even if he dies, Gusu Lan still has a Lan to lead it; it's quite in keeping with his reputation that he would want to make amends for his complicity by his death. Jiang Cheng would have died for WWX too, and like LXC is denied the right to choose, not to join them in death, but to know the truth about his golden core. Even though Jiang Cheng doesn't kill WWX personally (yes, I've seen the cliff fall scene, no, Jiang Cheng didn't even stab WWX properly; the whole symbolism and drama there is WWX has been hanging from a precipice and it's too late to turn back for him), he's still there when the skeletons (or in this case, one very pissed off fierce corpse lol) come rolling out the closets because Jiang Cheng never truly had the luxury of choosing to die, not even when his sister was still alive.

Yanli's health isn't as strong because of her core right? Even then, as the only son of the previous Sect Leader JC has to inherit and lead Yunmeng Jiang, not only to rebuild his home and sect, but also later on be his sister's backer so she won't be mistreated after her marriage into Lanling Jin. Yanli was lucky that Zixuan loved her, but if he didn't and she hadn't had Jin Ling, she could still rely on her brother to support her in the event of a divorce. Even though Jiang Cheng tried to protect WWX after the Campaign, he couldn't openly support his shixiong and his sister at the same time any more without being easily overpowered by Lanling Jin.

If anyone's actually read this far then maybe you're wondering, "but what about that time right after the Massacre when he lost his core and asked WWX 'why didn't you just let me die?' " well. Grief, trauma, also he wasn't that old when JFM and Madame Yu died, do you expect a teenager to react logically after almost every single person he's known has died violently? That would be an unfair expectation, especially when as sect heir he's also failed the people he's responsible for protecting. Guilt on regrets on abandonment, that's Jiang Cheng once you get past the anger and stuff. Also you can interpret that as "why am I not allowed to show you that I do in fact give a damn about you and your safety?"

Anyway LXC wanted to die after the truth came out but wasn't able to; Jiang Cheng made a choice at a fairly young age knowing that it could mean his death to save Wei Wuxian. Those were both choices made because at some point, they loved their brothers enough to die for them. It's kind of a pity that their brothers also loved them enough then to unmake that choice for them then, isn't it?

[amethystshipper]

I was scrolling through my dash, as one does, and saw .gifs of the scene where the juniors are defending WWX to Sect leader Yao, and I was just smiling and thinking “ah, the kids are all right this time, it will be better”. And then I realized that ... the kids were all right the previous generation, too? And it would have been so easy to see them band together, especially after everything?

Hear me out. In essence, there’s no difference between the juniors and the ... OG juniors. (We need a name for them. Is there a name for that generation??? Cause we have the parents, and we have the juniors, what are WWX&co named??? Whatever, I’m sticking with OG juniors.) Each of these groups went through shitty situations, the OGs arguably through worse with the war and all. But before the war, we have 2 major bonding moments: the Cloud Recesses classes, and the Wen indoctrination. What if they actually bonded together, and their relationships were more flushed out? (Keep in mind I only saw the live-action drama, so that’s what I’m basing everything on.)

So, Cloud Recesses. You have the Jiangs, and then NSH, LWJ, WN and WQ added to the group, more or less willingly. JZX is still being a little bitch, but whatever, he’s there too, along with MianMian, who is arguably his biggest contribution. I will admit, there are ... levels ... of closeness. But you have the three gremlins getting together, and LWJ pulled in (again, levels), you have star-struck WN and tough WQ (who, need I remind you, took care of JYL at least once, which I bet the latter will not forget). You have LQR spitting blood because the boy is definitely his mother’s son, but LXC smiling indulgently, seeing his little brother finally make friends. (And LQR will remember that CSR was mischief made human form, and her son definitely follows in her footsteps, but both of them wanted always to help and not destroy, so there is definitely something wrong with the accusations that WWX wants to take over the world. And LXC will remember the Wen boy who stayed behind to save one of their own, and the Wei boy who dived in to help them both, and will not believe the grim tales of the fierce Ghost General and the Yiling Patriarch.)

After CR, WWX/LWJ/JC/NHS have their little murder adventure, with a WQ cameo.  LWJ is added to the gremlin dynamic and sure, he might not feel like he fits in at first, but WWX cannot seem to stay away from him, and he suffers in silence with JC while WWX is being an idiot and risking his life, omg, stop that, get down you demented cat, and then finds that there’s a certain bond little brothers with big brothers larger-than-life have, and maybe having two more friends is. Acceptable. They’re all supposed to be 15-16 at this point, teenage boys that started this adventure fully confident, at least on the outside. And then Xue Yang happens. And this is, I think, one of the biggest turning point for these four. Because, to a certain degree, all of them rely on rules. Their own, if nothing else. And here is a guy who just ... wants to see the world burn. He kills with no remorse, admits it gleefully, and is just awful in so many ways. This is their first brush with how brutal the outside world is, when they start to doubt themselves and their convictions. But then! XXC and SL appear, and it’s a breath of fresh air! Because there are terrible people and worse situations, but as long as they hold fast in their beliefs and work together and trust eachother, they can beat them!

So they go to the Unclean Realm, and they meet Daddy NMJ. And he’s been watching them approach, and he sees his little brother laughing with the boy in black, he sees him cackling while the one in purple is swinging his fists around; he sees him share a smile with Xichen’s little brother while the other two are laughing so hard they’re bent over so far they’re almost falling to the ground. And he doesn’t show it, because the Red Blade Master is gruff, and tough, and mighty, but in his heart he’s already adopted these kids who include his baby brother in their circle with so much ease, it’s hard to imagine him on the outside. (And in the future, when people are yelling about WWX’s darkness, this is the image he will have in his head: four boys being innocent and happy and his, how dare you try to touch them?!)

Cloud Recesses burns. LXC is nowhere. And then. The biggest paradigm shift - the indoctrination. Everyone arrives in Nightless City. The three OG gremlins watch LWJ back to his jade statue default, they lose their swords, they are on the same side with JZX and WWX/JC don’t know which one of these frustrates them more. It should be the looming war. It’s probably the JZX part. Now, I assume they spend at least a few weeks there, I don’t remember if it’s mentioned. But WWX always tried to get in front, to catch WC’s attention. (Because he’s the disposable one, right? High enough in status that WC is satisfied when he gets to punish him, but not a sect heir, not someone who will bring down a whole sect if he dies. Little does he know.) So don’t tell me that the others don’t rally around him. (Discreetly of course. They learn fast that he just gets more protective if others are hurt because of him.) There’s nothing stronger than a common enemy, and the Wens and WC, specifically, are definitely that. So they watch, and they remember WWX being beaten, whipped, humiliated, all so that others will not be. Not to mention that one night that he doesn’t tell even JC about, because it would crush his little brother to know he couldn’t keep his promise. They remember him staying behind so that they have a chance to escape the murder turtle. (And after the war, when the adults will try to damn WWX for being too arrogant and too prideful, the OG juniors will remember the kid who stood up to the Wen clan and has the scars to prove it, and all to protect them. Where was Jin Guangshan? Where was Sect leader Yao?)

Lotus pier burns. WWX disappears. JC and LWJ look for him for 3 months. And then. And then he comes back. And he burns the Sun to the ground, using dark cultivation and corpses and no sword, and everything that they were taught not to do, ever. And he succeeds where everyone else fails.

Afterwards, when the dust settles but not really, when life comes back to normal but not quite, when things become too boring apparently, the young ones see their elders muttering. And gossip. And look a bit too much at WWX, too closely. But this was a generation forged in the fires of war. They were not like their parents, who had time to figure out their shit and then go to battle, no. They were kids when it all started. There are no more kids amongst them now.

So when the minor sect leaders, subtly encouraged by JGS and JGY, talk about the “young” LC being a leader at such a young age with honeyed words that hide rot, NMJ and LXC rise to his defense. Both of them became sect leaders at young ages, both of them know how hard it is. LQR rises as well and the older ones expect him to be on their side, but they forget LQR got entrusted with a clan and 2 children that he was not supposed to have, so he will never demean another who was in an even worse position, but rose to the occasion despite everything that happened. The Lans promote knowledge and learning above all, and many people can learn a lot from Sandu Shengshou, wouldn’t you agree Sect leader Yao?

When the Jin sect complains about the Stygian Tiger Seal, rumors begin to spread from behind hand painted fans that they are after the artifacts of other sects. After all, does WWX not belong to YungmengJiang? Therefore, do his creations not belong to the sect as well? Who’s to say they won’t go after the treasures of the other sects next?

When JYL destroys Jin Zixun at Phoenix Mountain, JZX steps up to the plate and stands behind his fiancee. WWX is obviously her little brother that she cares deeply about, he will be his future brother-in-law, and honestly Zixun where were you even during the war?? You have demands now because?? Go shoot some arrows and chill. (JC is just standing there with crossed arms, looking at Jin Zixun without blinking, keeping a tight grip over Zidian who is the definition of  “lemme at him!!!” Jiejie doesn’t like it when he slices and dices people, although she’s not leaving much for him to chew on. It’s the most fun he’s had in years.)

When JGY sweetly suggest that there might be a viper poised to strike them in the back, NHS innocently asks “but San-Ge, didn’t your blow to WRH’s back help us win the war?” (NMJ has never loved his brother more than when he roasts JGY. Really, he could cry with pride. Here, A-Sang, there’s that fan you wanted. I ordered new birdcages to be build back home, you can have all the birds you want. Training is ... postponed.)

When news about the labor camps and the slaughtered Wens are revealed, many stay silent. A few of them cheer. But there are also a few that remember a boy willing to save someone from drowning, willing to risk his life to save the dead bodies of two parents. They remember the best doctor of their generation helping them heal, and rest, and save their loved ones. They remember that they are not the only children who were taken by this war, that they were not the only ones forced to make awful choices that haunt their dreams. They remember that it’s easy to stand back, but yet there was always one who stood up for the others, who would stand up for them, so how can they not stand with him now when he most need it?

WWX is not alone. The YungmengJiang clan is not alone. These kids went through hell and back in the past couple of years, and they will be damned if they will let another rise in WRH’s place. This ends now.

[trensu]

Episode 32: The One where the Moonlit Rooftop BETRAYS Us

Remember how the last episode brutally tore the heart right out of our collective chest?

Well get ready to dial that pain up to ELEVEN BC THIS TIME AROUND THEY RIP THE HEART RIGHT OUT OF US AND THEN CRUSHES IT BENEATH THEIR HEEL

And i can’t even skip most of it!! Bc it is crucially important to know what state of mind our beloved sunshine boy is in for everything to make sense!! 

Especially for what’s going to happen in the next episode!

So we HAVE TO SUFFER. THERE’S NO WAY AROUND IT.

We start our episode at the super fun jin ancestral hall in lanling where jyl is mourning the death of her husband!!

Enjoy this bc this is literally the least painful moment in the entire episode!!!

My precious sunshine boy is lurking behind a pillar, guilt-ridden and alone

He can’t get any nearer bc of the guilt

But he can’t stay away bc that’s his sister, his most precious person

Too bad madam jin spots him

AND THEN JYL SEES HIM AND STARTS CRYING

WWX’S FACE HERE, OH GOD, I CAN’T EVEN DESCRIBE IT

STRICKEN? HEARTBROKEN? DESPAIRING?? WHATEVER IT IS, IT MAKES ME WANNA CRY

So he flees, he can’t face his sister, not when he’s the reason she’s grieving

We’re in the middle of a forest again! It’s even less fun than the last time we were in the forest!

MY DARLING WWX IS HALLUCINATING

HE’S HALLUCINATING HIS SISTER

HE’S SO DESPERATE FOR ANY SCRAP OF KINDNESS OR AFFECTION HERE. 

HE’S SO ALONE.

THE RESENTFUL ENERGY IS TAUNTING HIM “LET US OUT, LET US HELP YOU. YOU CAN ONLY RELY ON US”

HE’S SCREAMING BACK AT THEM, “GET LOST, GET LOST, LEAVE ME ALONE”

IT’S AWFUL. I WANNA DIE.

Now we’re at Qishan, listening to a bunch of cultivators gossip

Again.

The Wens’ bodies are hanging from rafters, all out on display in the open

Because slaughtering them wasn’t horrifying enough, they had to humiliate them after death too. Fucking jin clan.

Wwx appears behind the group and scares the shit out of them (GOOD)

He calmly pulls out his demon flute and starts playing

Within three notes he’s got the entire group of gossips pinned to the ground. Then he played a little extra just for kicks.

THAT’S MY BOY, SHOW ‘EM WHO’S BOSS

Now he’s like, why’d y’all stop talking? Weren’t you saying how you were gonna stop me?

And some idiot rando is like, you think you’re hot shit bully us weaklings?? You should go fight the clan leaders at their big celebration.

Wwx starts to choke him out bc he’s annoying him but wwx gives us this epic line

“Every injustice has its perpetrator.”

And he ditches those basic bitches to hunt down the guys that killed his people

Now we’re watching all this pompous sect leaders celebrating the murder of innocent lives, but we’re not gonna get into it bc they piss me off and nobody needs to pay attention to jgs’s speeches ever

Although i will mention that lxc and jc both look very conflicted at the events that are going down

HANGUANG JUN!!!

We’re back with the basic bitches and lwj appears!!

Lwj: where is wei ying?

Of course his first words in the episode are about wei ying. 

And they’re all aw, you just missed him bro, he left about an hour ago 

Lwj: where did he go?

And they’re like, Nightless City to hang out with the sect leaders!

Lwj’s face here is just, Worry and Dread. 

We’re back with the sect leaders. Jgs is talking again

Thankfully, wwx interrupts him with his mental breakdown!!

AND HE INTERRUPTS BY SHOWING UP ON A MOONLIT ROOFTOP

MOONLIT ROOFTOP, HOW COULD YOU??

YOU WERE SO KIND TO US BEFORE!! WE TRUSTED YOU!! WE LOVED YOU!!!

WHAT DID WE DO WRONG?? HOW COULD YOU BETRAY US THIS WAY??

Jgs: what are you doing here?

Wwx: why can’t i be here? don’t you guys want me here? I’m saving you the effort of hunting me down!

Then there’s a lot of back and forth with rando cultivators throwing accusations at him and wwx making Valid Points left and right

As we all know, Valid Points don’t make a smidge of difference against the incredibly stupid and obstinate. 

We won’t get into too much detail here bc it honestly doesn’t even matter what they’re saying, but there are a couple cool lines that i wanted to include

Somebody says something about him having a grudge against Jin Zixun a year ago

Wwx: Little characters like him i forget in 3 days, much less a year.

Which, like, LOL bc he’s right, jz was an insignificant little worm except worms are good for soil so he’s MORE insignificant than a little worm (i’m sorry worms, i shouldn’t have insulted you that way!!)

Later somebody says something about how they had admired wwx before but now they hate him

Wwx: Both your hatred and admiration is so cheap!

WE DO GET A COOL SCENE HERE THO

Some basic bitch shoots him with an arrow and it hits him right in the chest

Wwx barely even flinches

He tears that arrow right back out and covers it with resentful energy

Then LITERALLY THROWS IT BACK AT THE GUY WHO SHOT HIM AND PIERCES HIS CHEST

IT WAS AWESOME

And then he gives us another cool line.

Someone calls him vicious for shooting the guy who shot him before and he says “you’re already branding me as someone who uses wicked tricks, you can’t be counting on my mercy to let it go, right?”

It’s basically a whole ‘you want a bad guy? I’LL SHOW YOU A BAD GUY’ moment. Which looks cool, right, but is also super upsetting bc THIS IS MY PRECIOUS SUNSHINE BOY

MY PRECIOUS SUNSHINE BOY WHO ONLY EVER WANTED TO PROTECT THE WEAK AND DEFENSELESS

Now there’s a battle breaking out! Between the cultivators and the resentful spirits wwx summons 

WWX LOOKS SICK AF PLAYING HIS DEMON FLUTE AND SUMMONING SPIRITS, LIKE ALWAYS.

But we don’t care about this battle.

This battle doesn’t matter. Even if it does look pretty cool.

Because all the important stuff happens on rooftops, as we already know.

And on the rooftop WE SUDDENLY HAVE LWJ SHOW UP WITH HIS GUQIN

HE’S PLAYING MAGIC MUSIC.

HE’S FACING DOWN WWX.

Wwx: lan zhan, you’re here. You should have known i’d be immune to the Song of Clarity

Lwj whooshes his guqin away.

Wwx: lan zhan, i knew one day we were gonna have a real fight.

anD WWX STARTS PLAYING HIS DEMON FLUTE AGAINST LWJ

LWJ DRAWS BICHEN AND STARTS DIVING SWORD FIRST TOWARDS WWX

AND EVERYTHING HURTS

WWX SLAMS HIM BACK WITH RESENTFUL ENERGY BUT LWJ PUSHES RIGHT BACK

Lwj: wei ying, stop it!

Wwx doesn’t respond. In fact, he’s kept his eyes closed and unresponsive since he started playing his flute, PROBABLY BC HE CAN’T BEAR TO WATCH HIMSELF ATTACK HIS SOULMATE

I ALSO CAN’T BEAR TO WATCH HIM ATTACK HIS SOULMATE BUT HERE I AM WATCHING BC APPARENTLY I ENJOY SUFFERING

Lwj: wei ying, stop it now!

Wwx: lan zhan, do you think i have any other choice now?

Lwj: the situation has changed!

Wwx: what?

Lwj: trust me. It’s not that simple.

Wwx: what do you mean?

But before we can get any answers or clues or anything useful, we get interrupted by jyl’s voice crying “a-xian!”

And thus begins the world’s WORST, MOST PAINFUL GAME OF MARCO POLO EVER

Because jyl is on the battlefield, still in her mourning robes. And she’s calling for her brothers. 

Both jc and wwx hear her and instantly start looking for her

Wwx ditches the rooftop (and lwj with it), gives up his high ground and dives into the battlefield to look for his sister

He gets attacked by some cultivators and we hear the strum of a guqin

Lwj followed him! And defended him against attacks, BC THAT’S WHAT HE DOES FOR HIS SOULMATE. THAT’S HIS WHOLE THING.

Lwj: wei ying, your flute!

What he means is, keep playing, i’ll protect you from attacks while you get to your sister

And wwx starts playing again, bc EVEN AFTER he and lwj fought one another with all they had, he still trusts lwj

Jyl, jc, and wwx all take turns calling each other’s names. MY YUNMENG SIBS ARE TRYING TO REUNITE

Meanwhile we see lwj flitting about the edges of the screen blocking attacks left and right, and keeping wwx safe

SUDDENLY, we hear the sound of a second flute pierce the air! And the puppets get more vicious. WWX IS NO LONGER IN CONTROL

Btw, apparently, we the audience are the only ones who can hear this second flute BC NOBODY ON-SCREEN SEEMS TO QUESTION THE FLUTE MUSIC PLAYING EVEN WHEN WWX VERY OBVIOUSLY DOESN’T HAVE THE FLUTE AT HIS MOUTH TO PLAY IT

IT’S SO FRUSTRATING. I THOUGHT THESE CULTIVATORS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SOMEWHAT INTELLIGENT BUT NOTHING THEY’VE DONE EVER SHOWS THIS

And oh fuck, once the second flute takes over the puppets we get the SAD BACKGROUND MUSIC FROM “THE ONES WHERE WE GROSS SOB FOREVER”

FUCK

I CAN’T 

I’VE BEEN FUCKING PAVLOV’D TO INSTANT TEARS AT THIS MUSIC, DAMN IT ALL.

NOOOO, NONONONONO I’M NOT READY, I’M NOT READY, I’M NOT READY

The yunmeng sibs are still crying out for each other as this Sad Music plays aND I JUST CAN’T.

They finally set eyes on one another, only to see a puppet come up behind jyl

Jc is begging wwx to stop the puppet bc he thinks wwx is still in control

Wwx is so desperate here that he doesn’t even use his flute, he just starts SCREAMING at the puppet to stop, “GO AWAY, DON’T TOUCH HER”

And lwj sees this all happening! He follows wwx’s line of sight and sees that jyl is about to get cut down by a puppet

LWJ SEES THIS AND IMMEDIATELY TRIES TO GO TO HER AID

BC HE KNOWS JYL IS WWX’S PRECIOUS PERSON. TO PROTECT HER IS TO PROTECT WWX’S HEART

Also i like to think that lwj and jyl bonded over their love for wwx way back in “the one where jyl captains the ship” so he’d want to protect his friend anyway

But he gets intercepted by two other puppets who attack him and keep him stalled far away from jyl and wwx 

FUCK

WHY

GOD DAMN IT

The puppet cuts down jyl from behind

AND IT FUCKING HURTS ME IN THE DEEPEST PART MY SOUL

And wwx is in a state of shock bc HIS SISTER, HIS BELOVED SISTER IS HURT, HIS SISTER IS HURT

Wwx makes a mad dash towards her

But Lwj intercepts him and says “wei ying, stop your puppets! Stop them!”

Wwx doesn’t listen to him. He flings lwj’s arm away and keeps running

Wwx finally makes it to where jyl fell, where she’s now being cradled in jc’s arms

Wwx reaches for her but jc shoves him away

Jc: you said you could control them, you said there was no problem

He’s not even really yelling here, but his voice is all cracked, hoarse, and pained

Wwx: it’s not me, i don’t know! i didn’t make them kill people, why can’t i control them? I lost control of them!

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

I’M HURTING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW

I’M SICK OF CRYING, SHOW, I’M SICK OF IT. PLEASE STOP. WHY MUST YOU HURT ME

Jyl is still alive!

Jyl: a-xian, xianxian

She reaches and puts her hand on the side of his face

Jyl: you ran so fast, i didn’t have enough time to look at you and talk to you

AND I’M FUCKING SOBBING BC SHE SOUNDS SO WEAK AND WWX HAS TEARS STREAMING DOWN HIS FACE AND EVERYTHING FUCKING HURTS

Jyl: i wanted to tell you--

But she doesn’t get to finish that sentence bc she sees someone aiming for wwx’s back and she shoves him out of the way to protect him

She gets a sword to the chest

And the rando cultivator holding the sword is all it’s not my fault, i was aiming for you, wwx this is your fault!

FUCK YOU RANDO CULTIVATOR FUCK YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL

Wwx starts to choke him out, which is good bc i wanted to do that myself too

And jc is sobbing, rocking his sister’s body

AND THIS IS WHERE THE EPISODE ENDS

WHAT

THE 

FUCK

NO, I CNA’T, I CAN’T, I’M HURTING SO MUCH, COME BACK AND MAKE IT BETTER GOD DAMN IT

I HAVE NO MORE TISSUES!! TISSUES ARE CURRENTLY A HOT COMMODITY, I CAN’T JUST GO OUT AND BUY MORE

FUCK, JUST LEAVE ME HERE TO DIE. I CNA’T ANYMORE.

Return to Masterpost

[katemarley]

Open My Eyes (Let Me See You)

Fandom: Mó Dào Zǔ Shī /Chén Qíng Lìng/The Untamed Pairing: XiYao Characters: Jīn Guāngyáo, Lán Xīchén Rating: T

Summary: Problems keep piling up for Jin Guangyao during the night hunt at Phoenix Mountain. Lan Xichen gladly provides some stress relief. (“Missing Scene” set during ch. 69-70 of the novel.)

Written for Jin Guangyao Month on Twitter. Also available on AO3 (see the link in my profile).

A note on the canon this fic follows: It’s essentially novel canon (aka no members of the Wen Sect as living targets in the beginning – I’d have needed LXC to comment on that otherwise). However, while LXC refers to JGY politely as “Lianfang-zun” in Ch. 70 of the novel, he switches from “Meng-xiong” to “A-Yao” for good in between their first meeting in Ep. 4 of CQL and the battle at Nightless City in Ep. 23. That means the change in address must have happened while Meng Yao has saved LXC after his flight from Cloud Recesses, and I’m here for that.

*

Open my eyes, let me see you And blow this blinding darkness away —The Rasmus: Open My Eyes

*

The night hunt at Phoenix Mountain had been planned in minute detail. Jin Guangyao had studied the outlines of previous night hunts, the number of participants as well as that of the prey. He had enriched these older calculations with his own estimates and knowledge of the participants. There was nothing that could have gone wrong.

Or so he had thought.

It was less than an hour after the start of the hunt. He stood on one of the watchtowers, looking on helplessly as his whole planning was coming apart at the seams.

He had miscalculated, Jin Guangyao realised. As he had relied on the estimates of previous years, he had failed to account for the unprecedented effects of Wei Wuxian’s dizi playing. What was more, he had utterly underestimated Chifeng-zun’s hunting abilities – and that was something he should have seen coming. Few people knew Nie Mingjue better than him and yet, he had not expected anyone to eliminate half of the fey and the monsters on the hunting grounds within the first hour.

Beads of cold sweat started to appear on Jin Guangyao’s brow. All he could do now was expand the hunting grounds and increase the number of prey. But how? The original planning had taken weeks, and now he had to troubleshoot not one but two gross miscalculations within mere hours.

Jin Guangyao winced. Realistically speaking, he didn’t even have “hours” but one hour at maximum before people would start to notice.

Hastily, he mounted Hensheng to alert the helpers of the Jin Sect and to have them expand the hunting ground. Even with their concerted effort, he couldn’t be sure to succeed. Specifically, he could never be sure that just because the hunting grounds were expanded, the number of prey would expand in equal measure… But it was his best bet, and he had to do all that was within his power.

*

After he had alerted the last group of helpers, Jin Guangyao trudged to a fallen tree and slumped down on it. He knew this wasn’t the time to rest. Yet, there was so little energy left within him – spiritual or otherwise – that he couldn’t find the strength within himself to set out looking for more prey.

He sighed and closed his eyes to meditate; to channel the leftover scraps of energy that might save him from disappointing his father…

But there was no time.

Jin Guangyao started to tremble. There had to be a way to pull himself up by his own bootstraps, if only he could bring himself to think harder…

Suddenly, he felt fabric brush against his face. He opened his eyes.

Someone was blocking his vision with a sleeve. Someone who also put a long, slender hand on his shoulder.

Jin Guangyao relaxed. He would have recognised that hand anywhere.

“And there I thought I wouldn’t get my A-Yao alone today.” The chuckle in Lan Xichen’s voice was enough to melt Jin Guangyao’s tension. It made him lean into the hand on his shoulder – gently, gently, because Er-ge was so gentle himself.

“I thought I could surprise you,” Lan Xichen continued, lowering his sleeve as he pulled some of Jin Guangyao’s hair back from his face. A calloused fingertip brushed his jawline, making his whole body hum.

It had always been like this. One gentle touch and he was done for.

“Turns out you were just allowing me to get close to you,” Lan Xichen whispered, brushing his lips against skin he had only just revealed.

Jin Guangyao arched into the touch, debating with himself if he should tell his er-ge the truth. There was a good chance that Lan Xichen would help him expand the hunting grounds, but it would also mean admitting to an embarrassing lack of alertness…

Well, he could have one without having the other, couldn’t he?

He rose, Lan Xichen shifting with him unprompted. In a split-second decision, he stepped on the fallen tree.

Lan Xichen held him. Of course he did. Turning in his arms, Jin Guangyao found himself face to face with this gentle man whose smile always brought out the best of him. Jin Guangyao smiled back – not his polite, public smile but a private, genuine one that he kept for special occasions.

Lan Xichen was, in a way, the most special occasion of Jin Guangyao’s life.

The trunk gave him about the same advantage in height Lan Xichen usually had over him, so for once, it was Jin Guangyao who could stoop down and tilt up his lover’s face as he stole a kiss. Lan Xichen grinned, patiently craning his neck for more.

This time, Jin Guangyao kissed him in earnest. Lan Xichen’s arms slipped from his waist to his shoulders, effectively holding him against his body as he deepened the kiss. Then he made one small step back. There was a little hitch at the back of Jin Guangyao’s throat as his feet lost contact with the fallen tree. Lan Xichen was now holding him in the air as if it was nothing, as if he didn’t weigh more than a feather – or a xiao, for that matter.

Sometimes Jin Guangyao had the wild thought that being Liebing had to be perfect – gentle touches for the rest of his life and Lan Xichen’s lips forever near him in an almost-kiss… Then he remembered all the things he also wanted – recognition from his father and respect from other cultivators, most of all – and pushed the thought aside. Living for love sounded like a good idea in theory, but there were other things to strive for, and he had already come so far…

He broke the kiss.

“Put my feet to the ground, er-ge”, he hummed against Lan Xichen’s lips. Lan Xichen complied – he always did – but stole another kiss in doing so.

“Walk with me?” Lan Xichen asked. “I hardly got to see you these past weeks since you spent so much time preparing for this night hunt.”

“I wish I could, but…” Jin Guangyao sighed. It was a measured sigh – a tool to gain Lan Xichen’s attention. “As it turns out I did not spend enough time preparing.”

“I can hardly believe that!” Lan Xichen said with such conviction that Jin Guangyao almost laughed. “Everything you do is so meticulous, elegant and flawless—”

“I’m afraid it’s true. I’ve already set out to expand the hunting grounds because—”

They both froze.

Not too far from them, people were yelling.

“Is that Jin Zixun?” Jin Guangyao winced. “I will have to find out what is going on,” he said with an apologetic smile and an internal sigh. He was exhausted and had a sea of problems, but trust his cousin to make even more trouble…

“I’m coming with you,” Lan Xichen said in a tone that brooked no dissent, unsheathing Shuoyue already. Jin Guangyao didn’t argue.

As he stepped on Hensheng, an unobtrusive arm wrapped around his waist. He turned to Lan Xichen and was met with the most tender smile.

“Thank you.”

*

Notes:

With some nudging from a friend, I started MDZS a while ago. While reading the novel, I came to enjoy the suspenseful and dramatic elements of the story. While watching the donghua, Jiang Cheng snuck into my heart as my favourite character. While watching CQL, I ended up shipping XiYao – bless Liu Haikuan and Zhu Zanjin for looking at each other like that throughout the whole series! Also, heart-wrenching emotional pain with a fallible character who’d make an excellent protagonist in an English Renaissance tragedy? Sign me the hell up!

Oh, if you know of a XiYao Discord server – please, please, please DM me an invite! I need people and a place to nerd about these two (and my ever-growing Gothic rock/metal playlist for this pairing).

[llycaons]

ep49 (2/3): I wish jgs was alive so we can kill him again (more painfully)

oh jgy is so good. he developed a fake tell for lying so he can deceive his brother more effectively. come to think of it, xy was also a lying liar who tricked the person who trusted him the most and sent him to his death. I'm sensing a theme

...read a fic once where lwj was gravely wounded at nightless and lxc blamed wwx and then killed him because of it. that was juicy as fuck. their relationship didn't recover for years, not until it was revealed wwx secretly survived. that was a parent trap AU. wild time. anyway

a really powerful move to cement him as the shy, loyal yet socially powerless illegitimate son

oh god oh fuck remember how well this was done? they nailed the tragedy and horror SO well

yayyy uncle nephew time. wwx and jl make me so happy they're FAMBLY!

legitimate greivance! but jgy, this isn't a justification for jin zixuan! you murdered one of the only high-ranking jins who actually liked you and treated you with respect

like if he'd killed his dad and zixun he probably would have been fine. guaranteed a high position and zixuan could pressure the rest of the sect to treat him with respect, which he wasn't close enough with nmj to really push the issue on

yep that IS fucked. jgy's resentment is long-held and justifiable

ugh god I don't even want to insult a pig by calling him that. piece of shit!

okay this was a slay move

this isn't helping your case dude. you just admitted to mass murder

I can't even tell if this is an act anymore. does he actually feel regret over any of this? does he rue the loss of his autonomy, his self-respect?

god what a disgusting person for real.

I refuse to post the quasi-kiss because it's nasty but also IT WAS NOT A KISS!!!! flirtatiously transferring fruit between mouths does not a kiss make!!!

fucking losing it. honestly I get it

buddy. lan xichen. you asked.

I forget if I already mentioned it, but the temple scene is really gorgeous. a good place for emotional showdowns, even if they drag a bit

aw fuck yes half-face shot that looks kind of awkward but metaphorically works PERFECTLY. also I complained about people being taken in by him but right here I was like 'okay finally we get some honesty from him! he's admitting he's a shitty person! it still might be an attempt to glean that very pity, but at least-' and then the ominous music starts and we get this shot

and I was like "FOR FUCK'S SAKE YOU JUST DON'T QUIT'

jc, calling to wwx as if he's trustworthy again...hm

lwj how did you come to that conclusion. what do you know about unorthodox qin string storage

WHERE??!!!! in his hand???

oh jeez he's really going for it. that's more blood than he drew from wwx...for once, someone suffers more than wwx (sorry jin ling)

FUNNIEST SHIT IN THE FINALE. jgy ditching his loyal retainer at the first possible opportunity. to quote that one post I know they fucked and su she is following him around bc he's hoping to do it again. and jgy is clearly not above leading people on to keep them devoted to him

oh my godddd

lsz got thrown in for no reason and also wen ning just showed up so the whole gang's here!!!

but seriously why is lsz here. where did he come from? why is he alone? he doesn't even do anything. I suppose it's so he can stare at wwx and clutch his little butterfly toy very tightly but he is blatantly just shoved into the scene for zero plot reason

it's not a complaint because he doesn't interfere or anything, and another trusted lan disciple relaying the truth of what happened in the temple can't hurt, but it's weird

there's jc again. now he trusts wwx again seemingly immediately, relying on him for information and clarification 🥺

[robininthelabyrinth]

Howdy! Your writing rocks! If you don’t mind, could I ask you what you think would change if Jin Guangyao had given the regard he has for Lan Xichen to Jiang Cheng instead? Do you think there’d be huge changes or little ones? This isn’t a prompt, I think your meta is super cool. Obvs if you don’t wanna answer, there’s no pressure or anything.

So this is going to be more of an insight into the rambling way I develop stories than anything else, but basically these are my (very long) thoughts:

First step: the question is not “if”. The question is “how”. How does JGY come to have a regard for JC instead of LXC?

Let us posit that JGY meets (and becomes devoted to) LXC after he’s been thrown down from Koi Tower - rescuing him after the burning of the Cloud Recesses, which presumably happened while on his way to Qinghe or after he’s arrived (or, in the Untamed, when he’s working at Qinghe already). 

So, let’s take that as our starting point: JGY doesn’t go to Qinghe. 

He goes to Yunmeng instead, probably taking a boat to get there. Regardless of when he arrives, this doesn’t really go anywhere until after the Lotus Pier is burned, after everything that happens between WWX and JC happens, and now JC is raising an army and madly recruiting for the Jiang Sect. Meng Yao shows up with a smile and a “I’m from Yunping, just down the river, I want to help here” spiel, and he’s good - he’s efficient and smart and good with people, all the characteristics that made NMJ appreciate him, and JC needs good people so badly. Especially in the beginning, when he’s alone, with WWX missing.

But here’s the difference between NMJ and JC: JC needs people. He’s not a natural leader, having been dragged into trouble by WWX his whole life, and he’s brand new at being a sect leader; he doesn’t have established likes or dislikes, he has no idea what he’s doing. He’s going to rely on Meng Yao, he’s going to depend on Meng Yao - Meng Yao says jump and JC says “good idea, how high?” and he doesn’t even notice he’s doing it. Meng Yao is all but running the sect, and he doesn’t even have to try. No prostitutes’ tricks here, no smiles, no empty flattery - most of the subtle stuff goes straight over JC’s head, but a vaguely kind word every once in a while and JC will turn bright red and look pleased as punch for the next hour. That type of power is seductive.

And then WWX shows up.

As much as I love WWX, his dynamics with JC are not the best. WWX does whatever he wants and expects JC to follow, because he always has, and JC always does - how irritating that would be to Meng Yao, who up until this point has been put into the position of big brother for the first time in his life, and who now has to tip-toe around the ticking time bomb that is Yiling Patriarch!WWX to get what he wants. Plus, Meng Yao is good with people: he doesn’t need to know all the gossip about the Jiang family (though he does) to be able to figure out that, legitimate birth or not, JC has spent his entire life being treated like the sect leader’s dissatisfying bastard son - and oh, that hits Meng Yao in the one soft spot he has left, the spot that’s almost but not entirely narcissism, the one that LXC got into by being nice and kind and treating him like an equal, the one NHS, soft and dependent, got into by being sad and pathetic, and which JC, prickly and mean, gets in by virtue of being like Meng Yao.

He doesn’t do anything about that dislike, though; JC loves WWX, and the war effort needs him, so he’ll put up with him...for now. After a while, he goes to Langya - no need to have an accidentally-not-accidentally overheard conversation here! He just says “my father” and JC is like “I totally get it, go”. And when JC finds him killing that supervisor and Meng Yao says “he deserved it”, JC believes him, because JC is ride-or-die until you force him off the ride. He’s gullible and trusting, even though he thinks he’s cynical, and he’s about as susceptible to Meng Yao’s bullshit as LXC is (as we see in canon!)

So Meng Yao goes to be a spy and (because he doesn’t know LXC in this) he sends the info to JC, who sends the info to LXC (the courier), who gets it to NMJ, and all that stuff happens about the same way. Except NMJ has no reason to know that Meng Yao is a conniving bastard that uses friendly fire to settle debts, so when Meng Yao says “I had no choice but to kill them”, NMJ is upset but has no reason to doubt it. And now you have NMJ owing Meng Yao a favor, however grudgingly.

No sworn brothers, though, not with LXC to suggest it and without NMJ wanting to put Meng Yao on the right track, and JC is pretty sensitive about family stuff so best not to even suggest it. It’s fine, Meng Yao - now JGY - doesn’t need it. Just like he doesn’t need to do all that much to get JZX killed, just a suggestion here, a little trouble there, a bit of blackening of WWX’s name that’s really mostly his own fault for being so arrogant: it’s regrettable that he has to ruin Jiang Yanli’s marriage by getting JZX killed (sad, but necessary if he’s going to be sect leader), but she was never supposed to die. He even waited until she had a son and heir so that she wouldn’t be alone! He’s very nice, isn’t he? 

(And if WWX dying and Jiang Yanli dying means that JC is all his, with no one else in the world to interfere, well, that’s all the better, isn’t it? No one can take care of JC as well as he can.)

The Xue Yang situation is easy to resolve, too. NMJ has no “in” to Koi Tower, not without a relationship with JGY, and this pushes the two sects onto the brink of war - and that’d be no good at all, especially with JC grieving the way he is, all alone and desperate. Plus, JC has father issues, and that’s a little infectious; JGY is looking at JGS through the lens of JFM and it’s a lot less idealistic. So let’s say for all these reasons JGY moves up his plans and kills JGS earlier, and the second he takes over he vows that XY will be killed...except, alas, XY must have gotten wind and fled, because he’s gone. Awkward, huh? Definitely not JGY’s fault, though. Who are you going to believe is responsible for all that gross stuff, NMJ, the dead pervert or the guy who saved your life?

And then JGY is Sect Leader Jin and he and JC can raise little Jin Ling together, and maybe even Jin Rusong (although if he kills JGS early there’s a possibility that he wouldn’t need to shore up power in the Jin sect by marrying QS, or at least wouldn’t feel like he has to get her pregnant before the marriage, though of course there’s also no reason he wouldn’t do it anyway). Now what?

The Watchtowers, of course. Except in this world, NMJ is alive and well (no sworn brothers, no Song of Clarity here - except the legitimate one from LXC) and we know JGY knows how to put on the face NMJ most likes to see. So with JC in his pocket and NMJ fond of him, and LXC as nice and friendly as always, the sects live in wonderful harmony. In large part because JGY doesn’t need to murder quite so many of them. 

(and then over in Yi City, someone sacrifices their body to bring back the Yiling Patriarch because he’s their last hope to bring XXC back, either Song Lan or Xue Yang, and suddenly WWX is back - WWX who JC loves and hates in equal measure, WWX who’s a little too good at figuring out cause-and-effect - and JGY....JGY doesn’t like that. He doesn’t like that at all.)

[astarlightmonbebe]

The entire Stabbing Scene in ep 50 is very good but that part at the beginning where jgy is like "don't look at him! What could you see there? I didn't notice anything until just now, how could you possibly see anything there?" was EARTH SHAKING like just seeing on lxc's face how distraught he became and seeing how jgy was so betrayed and so disappointed in himself for Not Realizing until it was too late just made me go Wild

Yeah!!! I was rewatching it for vidding purposes and was very shook about it. Zhu Zhanjin’s acting there is superb, seriously, I remember watching that whole scene and practically shaking in my seat at how much emotion he put into it. It was literally mind blowing. 

The way he says ‘Nie Huaisang,’ and how he’s like ‘what can you possibly see? even I didn’t know’ and everyone’s eyes are wavering and Lan Xichen is all horrified and, as you said, becoming increasingly distraught over the thought that he had missed something. And Jin Guangyao’s face; he’s sitting there looking at Huaisang and you can see the bitterness burning in his eyes, the desperation in his voice that bleeds into hatred as he spits out Huaisang’s name. He’s filled with self loathing and also vengeance, because in the end Huaisang suitably played him - him, Jin Guangyao, who took down Wen Ruohan and his father and Nie Mingjue, three of the most powerful cultivators in that generation (and helped with what became of Wei Wuxian as well), who was arguably the most clever person, the one who didn’t get trapped - and Guangyao can only accept it now that he’s met his fate.

Then we have Huaisang, who is standing there, trembling and sweating, likely for a variety of reasons: he’s just been outed by Jin Guangyao and, therefore, thrust into the center of attention, and his plan has finally gone through. On point one, Huaisang is someone who has always worked in the shadows and always carefully avoided the fallout and responsibility, has now been exposed in front of everyone who has power in the cultivation world, everyone who is his tentative allies, and of course he’s scared. He didn’t plan for this. He probably knew Jin Guangyao would figure out his intentions, but he didn’t expect for them to be revealed at a time like this, especially when he’s unprepared for how to respond to them. Then there’s the fact that, yes, Jin Guangyao is dying. This is the final stage of Huaisang’s plan and he’s manipulated Lan Xichen into doing the deed for him, but even if it was Xichen’s sword, it might as well have been Huaisang’s hand guiding the blade. This is the end, and Huaisang doesn’t know what to do with that.

I also think it’s important to note the dynamics between Huaisang, Guangyao, and Xichen. For one, Xichen was always the binding force between Mingjue and Guangyao. He and Guangyao developed a closer bond during the time Mingjue had ‘given up’ on his own relationship with Guangyao (or, Meng Yao), and Guangyao was someone who saved Xichen’s life (when he fled from Cloud Recesses). Where Mingjue was doubting Guangyao every step of the way and practically detested him, Xichen was there as mediator. He worked so hard to build the relationship between his sworn brothers, while also maintaining separately close relationships with them individually. He put his whole trust in Guangyao because Mingjue couldn’t do that, because he chose to trust his friend, and to find out that he had been wrong about that? That’s devastating. 

Then we have Huaisang and Guangyao. Huaisang, who has known Guangyao since he was Meng Yao, who once considered Guangyao his friend. To Huaisang, Guangyao was the person he looked up to and adored, the same as his brother. He was polite and reserved and indulging of him, and I think Huaisang did equally adore Guangyao, in a strange way. They were only apart by a few years, and they both were illegitimate children, they both had slightly similar personalities beneath the surface (and they’re both character foils of one another, agh). He’s the person Huaisang looks forward to seeing - and think about it, Huaisang has slowly been losing his friends throughout the war, as Wei Wuxian goes off into his whole path of demonic cultivation, Jiang Cheng has to deal with Lotus Pier, his brother is away at war, and Huaisang is left alone - but he still has Guangyao/Meng Yao to rely on, to look to after the war is over and it’s just him and his brother, who seem to clash every time they speak.

And then his brother dies and it was because of the person Huaisang has been trusting this whole time, but he can’t do anything about it. To Huaisang, this is as great of a betrayal as it is to Xichen, but while Xichen finds it out all at once, Huaisang lives with the fact that his close friend and kind of substitute older brother figure did that to his real brother for years. He’s a Sect Leader with no power within his Sect, a personality that’s been a mask for years, and unsteady relationships. He can’t call out Guangyao with what he’s been doing, not when Guangyao is in such a position of power, not when Qinghe Nie can’t go to war with Lanling, and Huaisang can’t risk his unsteady grip on his seat becoming even more so. So he lives with it. He lives with that fact and that knowledge that only he knows and he acts nice to Guangyao’s face and he watches everybody else treat Guangyao with kindness, and his need for vengeance burns inside of him.

Which leads me to Xichen and Huaisang’s relationship. On the outside, it looks like a relationship simply by affiliation: Huaisang’s brother was technically Xichen’s brother as well, and Huaisang consistently hangs off Xichen and asks for help in running the sect (which, come to think of, he probably didn’t really need, not really), but I also think Huaisang resented Xichen, in a strange way. This might be completely out of canon and just my interpreation, but how I think of it, Huaisang had to watch Xichen, the one person who loved his brother as much as he did, treat his brother’s murderer with more kindness and closeness than he did anyone else. In my opinion, he likely started to resent him the longer it dragged on, for Lan Xichen’s own blindness towards Jin Guangyao’s actions (in my opinion, Xichen was at least unconsciously willfully blind to a lot of what Guangyao was doing), and in a way, I think he saw his chance with Lan Xichen in front of him and took it, because he knew that it would hurt Guangyao the most if the only person he was left respecting killed him, and also because I think, in a way, he kind of wanted the blood to end on Xichen’s hands, to bring it all full circle, as a kind of penance for Xichen not knowing the truth of Mingjue’s death.

It’s just. That whole scene. 

[thewickling]

I had this idea floating around my head and I don't really plan on writing it but I want to release this 3zun into the ether.

Possible Tags: Canon Compliant, Arranged Marriage, Post-First Siege of the Burial Mounds, Canon Divergence - Thirteen Years of Wei Wuxian's Death, Enemies to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, Political Drama, Eventual Polyamorous Relationships, MDZS Compliant

Premise: Madam Jin leverages her position to marry Jin Guangyao off to a sect-rate sect to wholly cut him off from Lanling Jin's sect leader position - LXC and NMJ interfer.

NMJ discovers that XY is only imprisoned and not executed. He prepares to march to Jinlingtai and force them to correct this. He runs into Lan Xichen who is very much did you hear?

Lan Xichen informs Nie Mingjue that Madam Jin plans to marry Jin Guangyao. Tradition and everything means they can't interfer directly without some complicated sect politics fall out. Nie Mingjue doesn't really care but Lan Xichen stops him from being rash.

Obviously, the option is if one of them marries JGY. Between LXC and NMJ, marrying a male spouse has a bigger impact on Lan Xichen's reputation than Nie Mingjue's.

Nie Mingjue does the "okay so if you're looking for someone to marry JGY off to, give him to me". JGS is greedy enough to accept the better proposal.

(Why Nieyao first? If I was treating 3zun like 3 sets of equations, Nielan and Xiyao are easier to solve starting off but opening either a semi-established relations to a JGY/NMJ later is harder. Basically solve the harder line of it first and then squishing LXC seemed seem better in the long run).

You know how LXC teaches JGY the Song of Clarity to get Nieyao to bond? Well, now LXC teaches it help faciliate their marriage :3 JGY actually plays it properly because now his life is tied to NMJ's. We get a bonus, less tempermental NMJ.

There's an uneasy peace in the Unclean Realm where NMJ mostly ignores JGY and JGY tries subtly manipulate NMJ while stablizing his position within the Nie Sect.

That peace breaks when NMJ catches wind of the Jin Sect trying to suppress the Chang Clan to avoid executing Xue Yang. JGY is very obviously attempting to balance his position as a Jin as a NMJ's spouse to stop NMJ from storming Lanling. The fakeness sets off NMJ.

"Stop flitting about, Meng Yao. Don't put on an act in front of me," Nie Mingjue says, swatting the air. "Your thing stopped fazing me ages ago."

"[sic JGY's commentary on class and privilige]. Jin Guangshan would rather bring another illegitimate child back than want me to succeed him! Madam Jin would rather marry me off than allow me to remain in her household."

"Why care about their opinions? They've casted you aside," he says, crossing his arms. His gaze is sharp and harsh but Jin Guangyao cannot recall when has it last been kind to him.

He hisses, "A well fed man believes not the man who starves! I admit my face is thin. How can it be thick? No one bothers to turn their head before they remark on my upbringing."

"Become great," Nie Mingjue states so plainly it pierces. "Make it so everyone who speaks Jin Guangshan's name instead thinks it's a shame that he never acknowledged you. That Madam Jin was shortsighted to marry you off. Why must you mind others? Silence them with your ability."

"What can I achieve? The little progress I made has been thrown into disorder. Who dares deals with me? It's clear I have no support in Lanling." Jin Guangyao spits, "It's obvious to everyone that my husband married me out of obligation. That you depise me. That you rather I vanish. May I ask, how can I achieve anything under these circumstances?"

"Lan Huan clearly favors you. And you're mistaken. I wasn't forced into this marriage," he says.

"I don't know how er-ge convinced you, but it's clear. You hate me." That word slides out more of a sob than an accusation. "Da-ge, I've always wanted to asked - why can't I be forgiven? Both our hands are stained so why do you bring up my desperate actions over and over?"

"I have never raised my saber for personal gain." His brusque manner relays how self-assured he is.

"If I understand correctly, then you say all of the people you killed deserved their deaths?" he laughs, "Then you must abhor me. I can never meet your standards. My hands can never be clean. If you find me so unpleasant, why did you marry me? If I am so unforgivable, why did you ever agree to be my sworn brother?"

"Do you believe anyone can force me into a decision? Whether it was brotherhood or marriage, do you believe anyone would?" he asks, turning his chin up. "No one can make me yield. I agreed for..."

He knows himself. Nie Mingjue accepted the rites to gain some influence over Jin Guangyao. If Lan Xichen were right, there was still room to correct Jin Guangyao's course. But why did he give Jin Guangyao that second chance? Why did he offer him a third? This isn't like him.

Why are you my exception? Nie Mingjue wonders, but says, "I didn't do this to spite you."

Jin Guangyao stills. This is the most ground he's seen Chifeng-zun give to anyone. His mind re-awakens and be pounces.

He questions, "So if I follow your path and risk my ties with the Jin Sect, can we agree to put our pasts behind us and try?"

"I haven't forgiven you."

Jin Guangyao's smile stiffens. "I know. I suspect you never will, but you won't ever convince me on the merits of justice and righteousness for its own sake..."

He slows at the firm set of Nie Mingjue's jaw. He redirects. No, he disarms himself. "Merit and justice won't move me when that seems as prone to temptation as my ambition."

"Meng Yao," Nie Mingjue hisses.

"You ask me to not lie," he grasps Nie Mingjue's hand. "Abstract concepts like that... They can't convince me of anything. If I said otherwise, I'd painting my words in the way you despise."

He inhales sharply. Somehow speaking plainly tastes strange on his tongue. He struggles to arrange his thoughts. He sighs, "I will never be the marriage partner you wished for. We've both done things the other can't accept... Don't forgive me but put it in our past... We understood each other once."

"Can try?" Jin Guangyao flattens his thoughts. "Can we try? I will do my part. Promise to try to understand me?"

And accept me, he thinks, but that never leaves his throat.

Nie Mingjue steps away and it's like he's been thrown down a thousand steps again.

Over his shoulder, he states, "I'll tell Zhonghui to put the conference organization in your hands."

This is their turning point. The first time they've both faced each other and listened in years. Nieyao obviously butt heads a lot but their communication gradually improves. JGY convinces NMJ not to storm Lanling and instead let him try to convince the other sects to pressure JGS.

NMJ gives JGY until the martial conference before he'll do something himself.

LXC visits throughout this period but his force is mainly on rebuilding parts of his sect. He does help JGY convince the other sects to pressure JGS into executing XY.

LXC watches JGY and NMJ get along and at first he's happy but he quickly feels left out. When he realizes that, he becomes ashamed of himself.

Before the trio can confront JGS, he announces at the conference that XY will be executed X time and anyone he doubts his word can witness it themselves.

XY is executed. People see his face. Something about how performative it, how XY moves plans a seed of doubt in JGY but he can't figure out what is off - other than JGS wants the Tiger seal too much to give XY up so easily.

JGY is side-tracked trying to get NMJ to support his watchtower plans. When NMJ finally agrees, JGY focuses on the logistics and getting other sects on board.

We get Nieyao's relationship improving and NMJ realizes his desires first. Unlike LXC, NMJ realizes his feelings, accepts them, and then acts on them nearly instantenously.

JGY does the logical thing when finding out the da-ge that once wanted you dead is like join me in bed - he runs and visits (hides) in the Cloud Recesses for a few days under the guise of watchtower discussions.

LXC notices JGY is distracted and they talk. Upon learning NMJ cares for JGY, LXC feels a pain in his chest. He encourages JGY to act on his heart and points out how NMJ and JGY balance each other out. He obviously wishes them happiness.

JGY decides to give the relationship a chance. As NMJ and JGY's relationship becomes more sincere, LXC pulls away from them.

When LXC realizes his feelings, he struggles. He obviously can't be so terrible as break up their marriage and he can't so shameless to impose on their time insincerely. He thinks of his mother and his father and just sort of falls into a bad spiral.

Okay so while running around trying to convince other sects, JGY notices that the number of missing people has gone up. He goes to the Cloud Recesses and notices something is up with LXC. When LXC doesn't share, he becomes worried and tags in NMJ. As they both invite LXC over more and try to provide help JGY figures out why LXC is like this.

He thinks about it and decides he hasn't fallen for NMJ yet (he's fond of NMJ of course but he wouldn't call it love) and he is no more opposed to LXC than he is to NMJ. He considers his way forward.

Baixue Temple Massacre happens. JGY understands why the execution seems strange to him. XY resisted too well. XY's cultivation is even poorer than JGY - he relies entirely on yin energy. It also clicks that the missing people are because of JGS.

Extremely obviously, everyone but LLJ do an impromptu conference. JGY leverages everything that occurred to get everyone to agree to his tower plans once this over.

JGS has been hermorraging support from the other sects for a while and since JGY has been negiogating with Jiang, Lan, Yu, and other sects for awhile they all support giving Jin Sect and ultimumun and then taking him down.

Before Jin Sect push forward a scapegoat and all publically chase off and kill XY [make it unclear whether XY lives or dies].

Political manuevours make it so that Sects joint ventures will be organized by commitee instead lead by a Chief Cultivator. Jin Sect is forced to pay up for the towers.

You know how there's a limited number of bachelors? All parents with daughters realize "hey so the only big shot sect leaders left are JC and LXC" and then throw their daughters and LXC.

LXC is very very very distressed. It would be insincere of himself to marry when his heart so clearly belongs to others but it is his responsibility to secure an heir for his sect. The sooner he marries, the quicker at ease Lan QIren and the other elders would be. Perhaps he should marry to restrain the shameless desires he has in his heart. Yet he does so, that would be justice to his future wife.

Okay this is where I got stuck (again) because honestly getting LXC to realize his feelings is straightforward, getting him to act on them is hard. He will just suffer silently.

You know what [inserts the author gets to make a forceful step forward]. NMJ is annoyed by all the women surrounding LXC. JGY sees this and after much thought and consideraton decides he wants both NMJ and LXC. He does his best to guide NMJ around to the same thoughts as him.

While all the romance plotty stuff is going on and the trying to get LXC married, like literally everyone - everyone finds JGS sus. Gusu Lan, Qinghe Nie, Yunmeng Jiang, and Meishan Yu under the guise of organizing the watch towers investigate Lanling Jin. They quickly realize that even if XY isn't there that LLJ obviously still has the tiger seal so they start planning a mission to steal the tiger seal.

Their plans work out. The tiger seal is in Qinghe Nie's hands. The Jin Sect is more or less dropping out of power. The four most powerful sects shift to be Gusu Lan, Qinghe Nie, Yunmeng Jiang, and Meishan Yu.

Extremely outraged, Jin Guangshan basically is an idiot and instead of waiting for time to pass so he can regain the LLJ's reputation, he very much targets JGY and tries kill him while he's traveling to supervise the watch tower construction.

JGY goes missing.

LXC feels guilty because he was supposed join JGY but shrugged it off because he was being an angsty bean about his feelings.

Because no one else can stop, LXC is grabbed to stop NMJ from straight up going into LLJ and beheading JGS immediately. NMJ very angry and pissed questions LXC and reveals that JGY likes him and that he thought he did too but LXC like this hurts his eyes.

Cue much higher levels of angst for LXC - but since JGY is gone LXC has to play Clarity for NMJ so they have to spend time together. NMJ refuses to let LXC act he doesn't know about everyone's feelings.

Because I'm terrible planning up to the ending skips. JGS is dead. JGY has been found (but like NMJ & LXC more or less believe JGY caused JGY to die). LLJ sect is in ruins but headed by Madam Jin as regent for Jin Ling.

JC, JGY, and Meishan Yu head basically make it clear that the only reason the Jin Sect still exists is because of their mercy. The only reason they are merciful is because JL. If she dares stirs the waters, they can change things.

LXC tells their elders he doesn't plan to marry any time soon. He's still young. He's young enough that they can't really force him to marry yet. He is very much in a relationship with Nieyao - a budding one and they're still ironing things out.

So this is very choppy and not ironed out because rough outline and thinking things up as I go. Maybe this fic does exist out there somewhere.

I think one of the other reasons I don't think I'd write this is I'd want to figure out a way to leave it open for Wangxian to still happen which unless MXY is driven to summon WWX doesn't work.