#he’s just so beautiful i cry myself to sleep about it every night

[just-jordie-things]

just megumi being the prettiest boy that’s it that’s the post

[absolberts251]

Dear Il Dottore,

I love you so much it cannot be contained into words. Even this letter is but a mere fraction of my affection. But I hope it gets the point across!

Every night when I cannot sleep and you're busy with work I imagine you laying next to me, your warm arms feel so real. I imagine you giving me snuggles and kisses. Even if in reality it is a mere delusion, it makes me happy. I care not if it is hurtful to me to love you so much, the happiness I feel with you by my side is something I will never forget nor change. Your existence brings me motivation and strength; something I find slipping from my grasp everyday without you.

In the early hours of the day I love it when I eat with you, even if it is a mere scrap or another tub of ice cream. Having you there with me is comforting. I know i'll never be alone because I have you with me! and i'm here for you as well! No matter what i'll always be here for you! 💕💕💕💕💕 I will be here to make you happy!! 💕

I love it when you tell me about how the serum you injected into patient 67 was a success or how you figured out what the missing component was to a machine. I love you so much Dottore!!!!!!! I feel like crying when you arent with me, even writing this im getting so emotional im.not evem joking.

AAhhhhh I just love you so much !!! I love you eyes, your face, your hair, your wardrobe, your ideals, your inspirations, your smile, and your EVERYTHING!!!! I just love you so much <3 WHENEVER I LOOK AT YOU I GET SO OVERWHELMED !!! I have to scratch and claw at my bed to calm myself down !!!

I love you so much I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!!!!!!!!

I remember you were so happy when I suprised you with that cheesecake for your birthday. You picked me up and gave me so many kisses!! I was so happy. And then for my birthday you made me a giant killing machine 😊 It was the best birthday present EVER!!!!!!!! I still love to snuggle with it!. I even got it a cute pink bow so it could match with you! It's so cute!! (but you're cuter~)

I love all the segments if it wasn't already obvious too!! Even if you cringe at things you did when you were younger, which is pretty funny :3 I love our son babyttore who gets rocks thrown at him!!! I love playing lps with him (he likes pulling them apart but its ok because he puts them back together afterwards) I love snuggling with you and all the segments!!!! 💖💖 YIPPE !!! *jumps around joyfully* I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!

*BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART*

I love you dottore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are so silly...... you are silly man :] 💕☺️ I love big spooning because it means I get to feel your soft hair!!!!!! YAY!! I LOVE YOU DOTTORE... You mean so much to me!! YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING MAN!!!! A BEAUTIFUL MAN!!! YOU ARE SO ADORABLE AND CUTE!!! I JUST WANT TO SMOTHER YOUR FACE WITH KISSES!!!!! AND I WANT TO HUG YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!!! you hold such a special place in my heart, all my thoughts lead to you. I see you EVERYWHERE!!!! I hear you EVERYWHERE!!! I'm so in love with you Dottore!!!

My dreams, which used to be empty now have you in them, whenever I close my eyes I see you there smiling at me. I love you! you are my everything in life, my sweetie pookie bear kitten. I love being with you every day 💕 you make every day worth it!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!!!! i love you :3 you are so smart and pretty, you're the prettiest man EVER!!!!!!!!! and I love you!!!!!!!!!!! :]

When im sad I think of you and my day immediately gets better! You bring me so much joy ! you make every day my best day! I love listening to you ramble about your experiments and theories! and I love seeing you happy.

I love kissing you!!! seeing you cute face blush whenever I kiss you makes it so worthwile! I know you think that you don't deserve it, but I will always be here to remind you otherwise! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!! 💖💖💖💖

I have some other things i'd love to say too but... *giggles* ehe! not here *blushes* thats for private ;) giggles :3 lets just say!! I wanna make whoopie with your cushions! 💖💖💖💖💖💖 *blushes madly* hehehe..... >//////< got a bit too carried away there sorry sweetcheeks <3 lets get back to the more sfw stuff~

You have such a beautiful smile that it rivals the world. Your eyes are like a sunset and your hair is the blue sky. Your smile shines like the clouds which litter the sky and the stars that scatter at night. You're my favorite view. You light up my world.

Even if others throw rocks are you I wont!!!!!! I will shield you from those rocks and bear the pain. I will protect you my princess! I will save you from the evil tower!!! and then I will kiss you 💕 I will give your face kisses.... and then I will kiss your lips!!!! 😊😊😊😊

A world without you feels so far away, the thought of you vanishing is one that brings me pain. I would rather bear the heat of a thousand suns than think of leaving you, my beloved sopping wet beast. I'll stand by your side no matter what!!!!!!!!!!! because I LOVE YOU!

You're so smart and determined that it inspires me to be my best self everyday!!! to not let others bring me down! You bring out the best in me and I bring out the best in you 💖 we bring out the best in each other!!!! We fit together like puzzle pieces 💕 Whenever i'm with you i feel like im drowning in a sea of love and affection, a blue abyss of serotonin 🥰

Your eyes are the same color as that which keeps my body alive, maybe this is why I always find myself getting lost in them. Whenever I think of you my chest feels like its going to explode! my love for you is so strong. Your happiness is my happiness, Dottore 💕 I love your eyes so much!!! they are so beautiful and I love how you get flustered when I compliment them ☺️ you're just so cute when you blush!!! It makes me want to kiss you all over! ♡

The warmth of your body when we snuggle is a comfort I love experiencing every day!! I used to have a hard time sleeping but with you I don't! The love of your embrace never fails to lull to me dreamland at night 🥰🥰 I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

You bring me so much happiness, I can't even imagine a world without you!! I would probably be withering in the corner of my room like a dead fly in a fridge (reference to the dead fly that was in my fridge). I would have been turned into tiny little mold particles!! but IM NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE IN MY LIFE!!! :DDD

Ill fight the heavens to save you. ILL PROTECT YOU MY SNUGGLE BEAR!!!!!!!!! I love you so much. Even writing this I feel my cheeks heating up! 😊 and when I hear your voice I feel butterflies in my tummy !!!!! i love you so much 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕😊☺️😊😊

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Ahhh! so joyous!!

Love, Absol ♡

[marvelsmylife]

Second Choice Part 2

Pairing: Azriel x reader

Plot: After three months apart from Azriel, you decide to pay Elain a visit in the spring court and make a discovery of your own

A/n I’m putting up a poll on which high lord you want to cause trouble in this relationship. Tamlin or Helion. Vote here

Second Choice Masterlist

You stayed at Rhysand’s cabin for three months and refused to talk to Azriel, no matter how persistent he was. Rhysand had to create wards to keep Azriel from entering the cabin. While Feyre and Nesta thought Rhysand was being extreme with his actions, Cassian, Mor, and Amren thought he made the right call.

It’s a good thing he did that because every day, at the same time, Azriel would show up with a present for you. It would vary from day to day. Some days, it was jewelry, other days it would be flowers and pastries from your favorite bakery. 

A letter would be attached to every present he brought you. He would beg for forgiveness in each letter and promise you were the only one he loved and that he was willing to wait for you, no matter how long it took. 

You would burn all the letters and leave all the presents he gave you outside the cabin before crawling back into your bed cry yourself to sleep.

It wasn’t until one day you decided to travel to the spring court to talk to Elain. You needed to know if anything happened between her and Azriel at the beginning stages of your established relationship.

Rhysand was more than happy to take you to the spring court. He felt like you needed to get away from the night court for a while, and while he despised the spring court, he would travel there for you. “I know you’re still furious with Azriel, and rightfully so, but he really is sorry about everything, and he does love you,” Rhysand commented when you arrived at the spring court.

“I know, but I can’t even think about forgiving him until I hear Elain’s side, and even then, I still have doubts. I mean, does he genuinely love me, or is it only because of the bond,” you replied and looked over at Elain and Lucien’s estate.

Rhysand knew you were right and that you had the right to know the truth. “Let me know when you’re ready to go. I’m going to pay Tamlin a little visit while I’m here.” Rhysand was gone before you had a chance to respond.

Turning your attention back to the beautiful estate, and noticed a clearly pregnant Elain waddling over to you. “Y/n! It’s so nice to see you again,” Elain had a radiant smile on her face and excitedly hugged you when she finally reached you, “It’s been too long.”

“I know ! !! I didn’t even know you were pregnant,” you smiled back before gesturing to her bump, “How far along are you?”

Elain had a bright smile on her face as she cradled her baby bump, “Seven months. Come, we have so much to catch up on, and Lucien just finished setting up the dining room so we can eat lunch,” Elain looped her arm with yours and started walking towards her house.

After an hour of eating and catching up, you were all seated in their living room and decided to bring up the reason you were there. You explained what you discovered three months ago and wanted to know if she and Azriel were involved while your romance was still new.

“I will be frank, there was a brief moment when I thought about being in a relationship with Azriel, but nothing physical ever happened between us.” Elain turned towards her mate, “And I’m so thankful that nothing happened. Being with Lucien is the best thing to ever happen to me. I didn’t know true love until I accepted the mating bond and fully gave myself to him.”

You envied the way Elain and Lucien looked at each other. Nothing but love and adoration in their eyes. It was so precious it made you sick. Wait, no. You were actually nauseous, “Where is your bathroom? I’m going to be sick,” you asked and shot up from your seat.

Elain quickly ushered you to the nearest bathroom, and you proceeded to throw up for the next several minutes. “I’m so sorry Elain. I don't know what’s wrong with me. I’ve been feeling sick these past few weeks,” you apologized and rinsed your mouth.

“It’s ok. In my first trimester, I was throwing up a lot. Poor Lucien had to hear it every night. Don’t worry, it’ll pass,” Elain tried to comfort you, but you looked over at her wide-eyed, “You do know you’re pregnant, right?”

When you didn’t answer, Elain just hugged you and caused you to start sobbing. Realization hit you that you were pregnant and had to tell Azriel he was going to be a father.

@sidthedollface2 @crazylokonugget @cleverzonkwombatsludge @vhjlucky13 @fxckmiup @sheblogs @isa1b2h3

[min1check]

Leto! Joker x side chick! Reader ig…

1248 words

Barely proofread ts so i’m so sorry if u see errors

pt 2

Description: You work at one of Joker’s clubs and he starts to take an interest in you….

Every night there would be presents and money left on my small table in my small ass kitchen in this small ass apartment. 

It all started when I finally learned the real identity of my boss’s boss’s boss at the club I worked at. I really needed money desperately for my family who lived out of the country. I’m currently working on the papers so they can gain legal presence but until then I need to work hard and study hard. 

At the club I worked at, they paid me better than most places and I would be able to go to university in the daytime and work at night. 

The club was pretty high class, there were many high profile politicians who were VIPs. Given that they were even at a club, they were most if not all sleezebags who tried to hit on the staff to the point that I could file sexual harassment charges. But nevermind that. 

The club was so high class and full of VIPs that I didn’t expect it to be owned by the biggest crime lord in this city, the Joker. This whole city was corrupt in and out. Even if I tried to file those sexual harassment charges I would’ve been shut up instantly. 

When I saw this head of green hair and his pale deathly looking skin and his red lips that I couldn’t tell if it was lipstick or blood, I tried my best to not be noticed by him. 

Though he looked like a corpse he was extremely attractive. Maybe in another universe I would actually try to get at him. Well and if his fellow Clown Queen of Crime didn't exist. She frightens me even more than Joker. Well actually that’s a lie but as a girl I can say that we’re ruthless when it comes to boyfriends and husbands and such. Too blind and in too much love to use actual reason.

Harley’s beautiful though they genuinely look good together. 

I went over to Joker’s table where he was talking to (or more like taunting) his client to drop off the drinks. It seemed that everyone else already knew what his regular drink was and his client’s. 

I tried my best not to mess up or to not loudly drop the drinks because at this moment I could actually not stop my whole body from shaking. They continued talking about their deal without even looking at me. I kept a friendly smile on my face. 

I walked off a bit quickly because I was terrified. Yet I felt like someone was staring right at me. I quickly turned my head and all I could see in that moment was Joker with his usual devilishly grin looking straight at me. My blood ran cold. 

When I was out of his sight I closed my eyes and started to pray. 

‘Dear God, please forgive me for any sins I have committed for I do not want to die tonight. I have too much to live for so please don’t let me die. Thank you for everything you have blessed me with Lord, amen.’ 

I was crying internally. 

Literally was gonna kill myself right then and there. But I brought myself back to reality and back to work. 

Whenever I would come to work the Joker would be there with Harley. 

I literally think I’m going crazy because I think he keeps looking straight at me…. With his girlfriend/wife/partner in crime which was even worse. Yeah he was hot but cheating men are scum of the Earth. And Joker’s a mass murderer and other stuff. To be honest I kinda forgot I’ve been too busy with school to care about politics….

I finally got a shift off and a day off of school today. I’m just gonna sleep and lounge around and be fat. I got out of my bed to go get some more ice cream in my kitchen. 

It felt a bit unnerving when I was in the kitchen, like someone was watching me. I shook off the feeling because I had locks on every single window and door. The crime in my country is a bit bad so Gotham wasn’t that much different. 

As soon as I turned around to go back to my bedroom with my ice cream in hand…

“Boo!” 

“What the fuck?!” I screamed so loud that I dropped my bowl of ice cream and it shattered. 

“The look on your face doll… it’s so… funny!” The intruder was the Joker and he couldn’t and wouldn’t stop laughing at my reaction. 

“…” I just stood there in silence thinking about how that bowl was so expensive…

I didn’t want my floor to be sticky so I started picking up shards of the really expensive bowl. 

“Aww~ Are you.. mad doll~?” He teased me with his usual grin. 

“Not really, I’m just a little sad because this bowl was really expensive.” I sighed to myself. 

“If that’s it then here.” Joker tossed money at me. 

“Um… It’s okay I’ll just work for it back.” My mom always taught me that I shouldn’t accept money and that I should always offer to pay so I gave that money back to him. 

“Just take it Doll, think of it as my~ first~ gift~ to~ you~” he really emphasized on the last part like really. 

He got comfy and sat down on a table chair as I cleaned the floor from the sticky mess. 

That sounds a little wrong, I just mean my ice cream trust…

After cleaning it all, it occurred to me…

Why and how did the Joker get into my apartment…

My blood ran cold. I feel like I could turn into a reptile with how much my blood goes cold. 

“I liked seeing you at my club but I like seeing you in this shaggy apartment more.” He looked at me. 

“Um… how did you get in here?” I spoke quietly afraid I would somehow strike a nerve. 

“It was easy! I broke your window.” He spoke like he just finished climbing Mt. Everest. 

My mouth dropped to the floor. 

Like I tried to close it but it just wouldn't. 

“…” 

“What~? Cat got your tongue Doll?” He grinned. 

I’m actually going to kill myself. 

At this point I hope he pulls out the glock 19 and shoots me….

Wait but all my windows are barred up…

I looked into my living room and realized there was glass everywhere and the metal bar was stretched apart enough where it would fit the Joker perfectly. 

Calculating the cost in my head I actually started to cry. Tears ran down my face. 

I would be fine if I picked up a few extra shifts but I had to study more because finals were coming up. I’ll have to cut down on food and sleep…

The Joker awkwardly patted my back. 

“Here’s some more money Princess.” 

“I.. Cant accept it.” I said between sniffles and pushed his money back to him. 

He suddenly grabbed my head with both his hands and made me stare him in the eye. 

“Take. The. Money. Princess. Or else I’ll shove it down your throat.” His face was way too close to mine. 

“Thank you…” I tried my best to smile while he was still manhandling my head. 

He kissed me out of literally nowhere. 

My blood went cold again. 

I don’t want to be a mistress or some side bitch….

And Harley’s gonna kill me……

Yet it felt so good. 

[nor-4]

More dominic fike?

Tags - Somnophilia, dacryphilia, breeding kink.

"I'm sorry baby, i just can't control myself everytime i see you like this.." He whispered with a groan trying to behave himself for disturbing you in your sleep as he slowly pushing up your lacey sleep wear exposing your breast.

It was never an issue to you that dominic comes home late from his gig, as long as you get to stay with him the whole day.

Usually everytime dominic comes home from a very sweaty night the first thing he will do is step inside the bathroom and shower, you made it clear for him that you don't like outside clothes and sweaty skin in the bed. That's understandable and that's the very first reason why he make an effort on doing your wishes instead of making you upset.

Well everything is different tonight some of his assistant keeps on pissing him off, the fans they are overstimulating him, he wants to stop singing mid way just to piss their night off.

On the way home his manager is bugging him saying it's obvious on how bitchy he is earlier while performing how he should fix his attitude, Everyone that would look past him while driving will know how much he wanna scream and curse everyone out.

On your shared home he sees you sleeping so gracefully how every breath you take looks elegant, he just want to ruin you and take his anger out on you.

That's how everything escalated from him stealing a little kisses on your neck to him pulling up your sleep wear pulling your panties to the side as his tip carelessly rubbing through your folds.

You are taking your consciousness as he slowly entering inside of you with the help of your wetness that has been damping your underwear.

"It's just me baby, Oh shit.. I'm sorry if i wake you up this late.." Dominic explains through out his groans as a moan liberated out of your mouth one last thrust before your cunt swallow his whole length.

"You look so beautiful huh?" Him talking you through it waiting for your body to settle and calm on his length, "Can i move now?" He asked before earning a nod from you.

Dominic starts moving in a gently slow pace massaging both of your breasts leaving out a kisses between it was all calm sweet it was a very loving kind of touches. Until all the memories from earlier came back damping into him like a bucket full of ice.

With that he starts thrusting into you in a lot more faster pace very far away from his pace earlier, which makes your boobs move same as the lace of your sleep wear is moving down from your shoulders to your arms as you stretched it out to hold on dominic's arms.

"You must be waiting for me for too long, don't worry baby I'll ditch them tomorrow.." He reassured you stopping mid way to pull both of your legs to hang on his arms before completely slamming into you making a tears of pleasure come out of your eyes as you squint completely wetting your lashes.

"You look so good baby, my cry baby." he remarked as you are starting to hear the bed bang into the wall even though there's already a pillow separating both of them, it's not like you care about the neighbors. Both of you live in a very romantic place and both of you know damn well they did the same thing you guys are doing right now every night so all of you call it quits.

"I'm gonna cum dom.." You muttered through out the moans as your nails is starting to grip on his biceps, "Cum for me baby, I'll hold mine i want you to cum for me twice before i do." he remarked leaving out a smile before attacking out your neck removing his other arm from your leg to rub down your clit as his thrust grew more harder as you release on him.

You didn't hear what he said as you yelp out in confusion when he hang both of your legs into his shoulder and thrusting up into you again holding your waist in place as you cried out in pleasure completely wetting your cheeks.

He raised his head up out of pleasure before seeing your reflection in the mirror that is placed in the ceiling, "You're glowing, look at you from the top don't you look majestic.." he said placing a hand on your cheeks after he gently let go of your legs making you look to your reflection.

It was a short chitchat about him looking down on you and praising you before he lift your waist up again and pound of you like there's no tomorrow, it was not the best position for you making you cover your face out of embarrassment muting out your moans.

"Come on pretty girl don't cover your face, unless you want me to tie your hands up your head.." Dominic warned with a chuckle before sucking up your neck that would leave a bruise as his necklace that has your initial on it is tickling down your breast the same rhythm as his thrust making you unable to talk from the moans washing your thoughts out.

With that dominic adjusted his legs to more comfortable before pouncing into you again finishing both of you undone, "Oh fuck, just put a baby into you love.." he murmured rubbing out your stomach as you are catching your breath, "You will make such a good mom baby.."

"Dom, i missed you.." You weakly said as he snakely hugged you lifting you to sit up with him still sitting on his dick as he coop his face on your neck. "I do too baby, schedule has been fucking me up. I just want to end this and make a family with you.." he rambled which every noise is buzzing down to vibrate on your skin as you gently caress his scalp.

"We will soon love don't worry, we don't have to rush things." You assured him as it has been a very big dream of both of you to build a family and raise everyone out of love and care.

[dreamwritersworld]

On the run…

just a disclaimer that this has been the longest since I’ve posted and this isn’t a for sure series! I’ve been super busy lately and I took a break because writing felt more like a need then something I wanted to do, i’m kinda back now and I hope you enjoy it 💕

Neteyam and I grew up together, we were very close. I grew to love him and I believe he felt that way too…until we were told that we would be promised to each other…Neteyam didn’t liked the fact that he felt tied down without having a choice. He was perfect at everything but being a good promised mate to Y/n.

Y/n however was very good. She comforted Neteyam when he was stressed about his father and she’d give him calming oils and treatment to relax him..

There were nights where Neteyam was absent, one night Y/n decided to hug Neteyam even with him pushing her off…

“I can smell her. Her scent. Irya.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Stop it! I caught you. And you’re not going to talk your way out of this. How many Neteyam? How many are there? How many have there been?”

“What does it matter? Hmm? We still are promised to each other and have no choice but to be mated. But irya is willing to take in that void until then. And maybe…maybe that’s better for everybody.”

Y/n scoffed at his attitude towards the situation…the man she loved, the boy she grew up with, had become so heartless to her.

“You know what, it’s better for you! You have a pretty good deal don’t you? You go out! You fool around! I sit here, I take care of your home and the clan. Well no more! That’s it.”

“Calm down!”

“No! I’m not going to do this anymore! Ok? I’m not going to sit here and take it and take it! Sorry! I love you, yes! But I am not dirt! I am promised to you! And you will not do this to me anymore-“

“Enough! I’ll stop! It’s fine. But you will not raise your voice at me. We will not do anything until we are to be mated.”

Y/n watched as Neteyam turned his back to go lay on the hammock with a blanket that Y/n made and cleaned just for him. If this was how things were going to be…it pained her completely but he came home didn’t he? He came home to her..?

She slept that night right beside him…cold and crying. He didn’t ever hold her while she slept..not like how they did when they were younger.

Truth was Neteyam didn’t sleep with Irya, no he could never. He just laid with her…he knew her scent was enough to break Y/n’s heart further…

~~

I stayed strong…I dealt with the pain and still claimed him proudly and openly…waiting on the day he called out my name.

I said I didn’t feel nothing but I lied, I almost cut a piece of myself for his love.

The passing Navi’s would smile at me and ask how Neteyam was…I would responded proudly.

“Ah yes Neteyam! He is doing well! Very good!”

Oh how I wished I didn’t get this treatment…I wish I could’ve been able to choose. In all honesty I would’ve still chosen Neteyam but it’d be on my terms..can’t say the same for him.

My days had an endless routine, I felt so trapped. I wanted Neteyam to stay even though he didn’t want me. Why can’t he wait till I fall out of love?

After everything going on…the war…the panic. It was decided that we’d have to give up our home and roles of the clan…everything. That meant every last tear, blood shed and sweat that Neteyam and I sacrificed to be the next leaders were wasted. Just because I was leaving didn’t mean I wasn’t no longer promised to Neteyam, he had all of me.

The move was so difficult and I didn’t know how else to comfort someone who didn’t want to be loved by me…but when he let me hold him, it gave me hope.

“We’ll be ok Ma’tyem”

The journey was long and tiring…it dragged and made our bodies sore…weak. Riding beside Neteyam made it worth it, all I could do was focus on him and how beautiful he truly was. Taking in his presence was my best bet at loving him from afar. Something about finding a new home and having a new adventure felt good despite leaving my entire life behind..

When we had arrived, nervousness ran through my veins…I allowed myself to be the last of the group to get off, watched how Neteyam protected his siblings and remained respectful just like his father.

I walked in cautiously repeating Neteyam’s same action and passing small smiles to those I had made eye contact with and then suddenly I made eye contact with someone who caught my attention …it was a boy who seemed about our age, instead of giving disgusted looks like he was before he froze. Soon enough the soften look in his eyes brought me into confusion, and I turned away. A warm unfamiliar arm wrapped around my waist, tuggin me forward and I couldn’t help but be more focused as to what was wrong.

Neteyam never held me, not anymore…not like when we were children. He pushed me to listen to the leader of the clan..that’s when I discovered the beautiful girl who Lo’ak shared a moment with was Tsireya and the boy I briefly noticed was Ao’nung..both children of the clans leaders. My ears went up and tail swayed at the new introduction, new people? New setting? Absolutely brought me bliss.

Unpacking was draining and having to now share a mauri with a full family was something I’d have to get used to, I didn’t mind though. I grew up with the Sully’s and remained very tight with all siblings…Neteyam included until our parents suggested we’d be mated. Of course I loved that idea…but Neteyam felt forced, it made him hate me.

It was another night of falling asleep beside Neteyam except this time he turned his body towards me and loosely had his arm around me. It was then that I realized I missed his touch so much and I’d settle with this even if it only meant he was doing it to prevent his family from questioning the separation.

I had butterflies take over me, placing my hand on top of his…only for him to pull his hand away and lay it on my hip, furthering any more affection..

Soon the sun rises and I woke up early to help prep meals for everyone with Neytiri, to her I was perfect. In my eyes I was far from it, not even able to satisfy her child.

I made my way sitting quietly next to Neteyam, my mind was still focused of last night’s interactions and our relationship…soon enough the loudness and spinning in my head only begged me to just take a moment for myself, I paused my eating and excused myself…but walking away I can hear my childhood best friends speak.

“What’s wrong with her?..she’s been quiet.”

“She’s always quiet Lo’ak-“

Kiri was one of the only people who noticed the great shift in Y/n. They grew up together, Y/n was open to Kiri about her crush on Neteyam and she never told any one although she enjoyed the idea of them together, it made her so happy when they were promised…but now after a couple of months with them together, Kiri could see something was weighing Y/n down.

“Not always! She only starts to get quiet when Neteyam’s around! You make her nervous bro! Y/n’s been in love with you since we were kids and now you guys are going to be all lovey, dovey once your Mated!!!”

Neteyam couldn’t even reply, it wasn’t that he didn’t love you…or maybe he didn’t? He himself, couldn’t understand his feelings towards you. Neteyam just wanted time to choose his mate and who he loved.

He was truly living his fathers dream, sacrificing his life to repay and honor his parents sacrifice. Would he had chosen Y/n, his once childhood crush as his mate? Would he have done it if he wasn’t forced? He didn’t know.

Y/n took in Lo’ak’s word..she did only get quiet around Neteyam, she knew how quickly and easily it was to annoy him.

*flashback*

It was the beginning of their relationship and he couldn’t be anymore closed off with her. All Y/n wanted to do was love him and be a perfect mate to him. So when he walked through the door…that’s exactly what she did.

“Neteyam, I’ve made you dinner! Your favorite!”

“Not hungry.”

His response was short but however, what made the two perfect was that no matter how calm and collected she was…she remain optimistic.

“Ok! That’s fine! I’ll prep it for you in the morning, when you’re ready to go back to training-“

“Y/n! How many times do I have to say it? I’m not hungry! I do not want your food! Just be quiet!…voice is annoying…relationship is business only..”

Y/n perfectly heard his last muttered words and it brought her to tears as she wrapped his food up, she had stayed up late waiting to eat with him once he arrived home…but now he laid in bed. Y/n blew the candles providing light and closed the tent enough just for a little moonlight to shed as she provided him a calm setting to fall asleep in while she struggle to eat in the dark.

Neteyam could see though, he saw her tears roll down her face and her hand quiver as her eyebrows furrowed and head shake as if telling her that it’ll all be ok. It took everything in him to not apologize for being so cold, but he couldn’t..not now when he was so frustrated.

*

Y/n lost her optimistic side…instead of being calm, she slowly was just pulling herself into a fiery state. After so much coldness could you blame her? She didn’t have any time for playing around or a moment for herself..but now with this new home, she did.

There it was Y/n sat outside taking in the sunrise and fresh breeze, she was just starting to relax when Kiri interrupted

“So…I’ve been meaning to ask but nothing feels like the right time but…are you ok? Like I mean really ok? I can feel your energy Y/n.”

It took Y/n by surprise and it only took Kiri to see her face for her to know whatever she was going to say next was a lie. That’s exactly how it all played out, Y/n had her mouth slightly open in shock and then she smiled, not a true one thought just a small one with closed lips.

“Of course Kiri!…it’s just the move.”

Silence stood between them, Kiri could see the little white lies Y/n told herself and it hurt her. Y/n was never one to be standoffish or guarded.

“Right..well soon enough we’ll start training to get used to this environment-“

“Hello! We’re here to start training”

Both girls looked at Tsireya in surprise and soon settled into a smile, excited to finally have a taste of something new. Y/n stood proud and tall before tsireya, she admired it truly. To tsireya if she would’ve stayed at the forest she would’ve been a perfect leader for the people…what could’ve been.

“I’ll go ahead and get the others! Excuse me.”

Ao’nung watched from a far…Y/n was captivating to him. Her voice and the way she walked presented herself with confidence.

His smile stayed until he saw her stand beside Neteyam, they walked together as one but in silence.

They all trailed after each other one by one. Ao’nung tried to slow down so that his speed would align with Y/n’s but it just didn’t happen.

Tsireya decided to start by swimming first and excitement erupted amongst Kiri and Y/n as they grabbed each others hands swimming down around the corals of the reef.

Ao’nung pushed the rest of the group forward and he allowed his sister to take over as he glanced over to Y/n doing flips around the ocean and viewing the fishes in amazement. Y/n put herself in tune with the ocean..if she was going to live here she had to act as one of the people.

Neteyam couldn’t help but notice Y/n staggering behind the group and he rolled his eyes at her childish behavior… when he went up to the surface with everyone else gasping for air, he looked back beneath the water..he saw Ao’nung swim over to Y/n, watch them exchange smiles while swimming up beside each other.

“You’re pretty good for a beginner! I can show you how to-“

“Y/n!-“

neteyam was going to interrupt but he was quickly interrupted by his own little sister, gasping onto Y/n’s arms and his arms.

Y/n quickly passed a smile at Ao’nung as she now turned her attention to Tuk cradling her while Neteyam fixed Y/n’s hair from getting caught onto Tuk.

The sudden touch caught Y/n by surprise, she was quick to turn her head in confusion until Tysireya’s voice brought them back to focus

“It’s fine if your not the best right now…we should try getting you guys on ilu’s! I’m sure you’ll love it!”

Another tug to another direction, telling Y/n to swim with him. There was not a chance Neteyam was going to leave Y/n with Ao’nung when it was clear to him, he was trying to get close to her.

this interaction between the two didn’t fly past Y/n she didn’t understand what Neteyam was trying to do. Once practice ended she allowed the group to go past and speak amongst each other while she began tugging back at Neteyam’s arm to walk with her. They said their goodbyes respectfully and Y/n held onto Neteyam the entire time.

“What are you doing? You have a role to withhold still Neteyam. Be respectful. You must remember that this isn’t our home.”

“Me? What am I doing wrong? You must’ve forgot that you have to withhold your role with me. You are my future mate do not forget.”

“I haven’t done anything that can make you imply that I have, are you kidding?”

“So why are you getting friendly with-“

“This is not our land. Our relationship has been in shambles because of you-“

“How dare you blame me? What? Because i went out to get my needs done so I can keep pushing to Be with you. I did it for us.

Tears welled up in Y/n’s eyes as she realized he was now the one blaming her for their relationship.

“I’d rather go blind then to see you walk away from me, with another women. I never asked you to do that.”

“But it needed to be done Y/n, you can’t maintain me.”

“This isn’t my fault Neteyam please stop. I’m not doing anything wrong. I haven’t gotten overly friendly with anyone. Just stop.”

“Don’t talk to Ao’nung Y/n, I’m not asking you.”

“I don’t need you telling me it either. I have to remain mutual and respectful to everyone, even if it means speaking to them.”

“You will be disrespecting me-“

“Please, this is barley scratching the surface of what you’ve done to me. This relationship is business only. Isn’t that what you said? So then stick to your words. It stopped meaning anything to me the moment you started acting this way.”

She was lying, but she wanted to shoot a bullet at him just like he did to her. When she looked back at Neteyam she didn’t notice the pain flushing his eyes or that fact that his heart was beating rapidly, he truly hurt hearing her stand up to him. It hurt him to see that he can’t seem to keep her close and let her go. He knew though, he still had her…even if it meant she was speaking back.

Later on in the night when it was time to eat, Y/n made sure to start a conversation with Tuk to make sure she was settling in well. Tuk pulled her arm to sit with her and Y/n did. Kiri quickly sat next to Y/n sensing something was wrong with her. This left Neteyam to sit in front of her, though Y/n didn’t even bat an eye at him.

“Did you see all the fishes down there Y/n?!”

“Oh I did Tuk! They were beautiful!!”

Jake had interrupted their conversation discussing the clan and asking how the children were treating them.

“Ao’nung sucks and Tsireya is really nice.”

Lo’ak was clearly biased to Tsireya based on the way he was smiling so his opinion flew out the window in Jake’s eyes.

Everyone began speaking quickly and clashed their words together as Y/n watched trying to follow everyone’s words.

“Mmh I barley heard a thing anyone said…what about you Y/n how were they?”

Jake knew Y/n had a thing with words, she was descriptive and knew how to speak properly. She observed everything there was to a person.

“Tsireya was sweet, attentive while teaching and patient. Ao’nung was witty, quick to say something and less patient. Overall they are good people-“

“Please Y/n Ao’nung was the worst, maybe not to you!”

Lo’ak had spoken in a teasing voice, implying something he shouldn’t. Jake had shut down his youngest teasing seeing it as a learning lesson

“It’s about being respectful. The face that you had while learning their ways probably didn’t help Ao’nungs remarks. Your face tells everything, Y/n knew how to behave.”

Neteyam grew silent only looking at Y/n and his food, quietly pushing for her to say more.

“Yes correct, this isn’t our home yet..but we must learn their ways with a positive attitude.”

The tension felt visible to the couple sitting across from each other and it continued when Y/n looked up at Neteyam after saying the statement.

She got up attempting to remain calm, picking up her meal and placing it to the side. After cleaning up and paying her respects she resided off to the side not facing Neteyam if he were to sleep on her hammock…

There it is that dip of him crawling back to my bed, enraging me over and over again without a care in the world that he hurt me.

*💕*

remember that this isn’t a for sure series, it’s definitely not perfect either I’m just trying to get into the groove of things again :))

[funnyjb]

Mama

………………………………….

It’s Friday night and instead of going out with friends like you usually do on Friday nights, you were at home taking care of your new bundle of joy. Emma came into yours and Joes lives just about last week. April 8 at 6:21pm was when Emma was born. Joe and yourself couldn’t be more happier to have her in your lives.

Joe is such an amazing father. You would walk into her nursery and see him leaning over her baby basket.

You were in the bathroom getting ready for bed. You were exhausted. Getting up in the middle of the night every single night, feeding her 24/7, taking care of her when she cries, and not getting any sleep wasn’t helping. You were in your pjs putting on your moisturizer when Joe walked in. He looked tired too. He just put down emma for the second time and was ready to get to bed. He could tell you were a little off because you didn’t get any sleep.

“Hey.”- joe

You looked up at him through the mirror

“Hey, is she asleep?”- you

“Yeah, finally.”- joe

He walked over to the sink next to you and started turning on the sink.

“Are you ok? I know it’s been a crazy week.”- joe

“I’m fine Joe. Everything is fine.”- you

The truth was everything isn’t really fine. You loved emma and Joe, but postpartum is hitting you hard. You are so tired, you don’t feel right in your own body, and as said before no sleep doesn’t help.

“No it isn’t y/n, I can tell.”- joe

“Joe, seriously I’m not in the mood right now.”- you

You closed your skincare bottles, wiped your hands on the towel and headed out the bathroom.

Joe was a little mad that you weren’t saying what you needed to say but he understood. He knows you don’t really like talking about your feelings and he knows to give you some space when you need some. After he was done in the bathroom which was a couple minutes later and he came out into the bedroom where you were. You were folding some clothes and putting them on the chair next to his side of the bed.

“Y/n, you need to tell me what’s going on. I know something is up. I know that you are tired, but I want to make sure you are ok. I love you and I want to know what is going on in my wife’s mind.”- Joe said calmly

“You what to know what is going one Joe?”- you said turning around with an unfolded onesie in your hands

“Yeah, I do.”- Joe

“Alright, here let me tell you. I am tired, Joe. So dang tired. I’ve been woken up probably four-hundred times this past week because emma is crying or she is hungry. And you have been such a big help and I am so, so, so grateful, but I am so dam tired. I don’t feel like myself. My body has changed for a good reason, but I don’t feel right. I’ve been feeding her 24/7 and my body hurts. And no sleep isn’t helping. So there you go, Joe. Is that what you were looking for?”- you

It stayed silent for a minute.

“I’m sorry baby. I’m sorry it’s been hard on you. I know taking care of a baby is a lot of work especially for a mother, but you are a great mama to our beautiful baby sleeping in the other room. You are so strong, y/n. You are beautiful. In my eyes you are beautiful. You are the only gorgeous, beautiful, strong, and amazing loving girl I know.”- joe

He walked up to you. Joe put his hands on the side of your face.

“I love you, y/n. I love you so much it hurts. And our baby is the luckiest baby in the world, you know why?”- joe

“Why?”- you laugh

“Because she gets to call you her mom.”- Joe

Your eyes started to get teary.

“Everything is going to be ok.”- joe

He pulled you into him and kissed your forehead then your lips. You wrapped your arms around his body and held him tight. Some tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Shh, it’s ok baby.”- Joe

You wiped your tears and smiled

“Thank you, Joe. You are the best husband a girl could ask for and an amazing father to our little girl. She is one lucky baby to be calling you her daddy.”- you smiled

Joe smiled and kissed you.

“Thank you, baby. Ready to go to bed?”- joe

“Yeah.”- you

Joe walked to his side as you walked over to yours. You turned off your lamp and got under the covers. The dark room was quiet. Joe pulled you into him and held you tight.

“I love you, y/n Burrow.”- Joe

“I love you too, Joe burrow.”- you

————————————————————————

(Next morning)

You woke up to the smell of pancakes. You turned over to see Joe, but was no where to be found. Then you turned over to your side table to check the time.

“11:00!”- you

You pulled the cover off you and put your Ugg’s on.

You walked down the stairs as carefully as you could because you were still recovering. As you walked off the last step of the stairs you saw your family and Joes family too.

“Oh, there she is!”- your mom

“Hi!”- you said crossing your arms against your chest

You walked over to your mom and gave her a kiss.

“Hey, sweetie!”- Robin

“Hi!”- you

“All of us just wanted to see how you and the rest of the family were doing!”- Robin

“Aww that’s very sweet, but we are doing good!”- you

“How are you doing though?”- Robin said in kind of a whisper

“I’m doing ok, thank you.”- you said giving her a sweet smile

You then said good morning to your dad and Jimmy. Then came over to Joe.

“Good morning!”- Joe

“Good morning.”- you smiled

He gave you a sweet kiss.

“How are you?”- joe

“I’m good, doing ok!”- you

“How are you?”- you

“I’m good! Just making breakfast for you!”- Joe

“Aww Joe, that’s so sweet, thank you.”- you

“Of course!”- joe

“Hey, where is em?”- you

“Oh, she just went down for her nap.” Should be up soon. - your mom

“Oh, ok.”- you

Just as you spoke the baby monitor turned on. Emma was crying. You could tell it was a hungry cry.

“I will get her.”- Joe

“”It’s ok Joe, I got her. I can tell she is hungry.”-you

“You sure?”- joe

“Yeah, it’s ok baby. I will be back in a few!”- you

“Ok.”- joe

You then stared walking up the stairs and into Emma’s nursery.

“Hey, baby!”- you

You picked her up.

“Shh, shh, it’s ok. It’s ok, baby girl.”- you

You the sat down on the rocking chair to feed her. You pulled done your sweater on one of your sides and started feeding her.

“You are so precious.”- you

A few moments pasted by and you were still admiring how pretty she is.

“I love you em. Your father and I love you so much.”- you

You the stared to feel teary

“I’m sorry em. I’m just tired. Even though I slept in very late today. Jeez, why am I so tired?”- you

You chuckle at the exhaustion that is hitting you. You don’t know why though. You slept in so why are you so tired you thought.

You wiped some of your tears so your family wouldn’t see you were crying when you got downstairs. Emma was done feeding so you put her back in her crib and switched off the lights to let her get some more sleep.

You walked down the stairs to find your family sitting in the same place. The monitor was a little more close to them. It looked like they were listening in.

“Hey.”- you

They all looked at you.

Your mom got up and hugged you tight. You were a little confused at first but the you caught on. They were listening in on you in Emma’s room.

“How about we take emma for the day? Give you and Joe some time to relax and rest. How does that sound?”- your mom

You looked at Joe then back at your mom.

“Um, yeah sure.”- you

“Ok, we can pack a bag when she wakes up.”- your mom

You nod your head.

You walked over to Joe

“I’m going to go um… wash up.”- you

“Okay. Your breakfast is done, so it’s here is you want it”- Joe

“Thanks.”- you

You kissed him on the lips and went up.

“Oh honey, how long has she been like that?”- Robin

“She has been off for a bit but she talked to me about everything last night. I just don’t want her feeling this way. It hurts to see her like this.”- joe

“I know sweetie, but that why maybe you need a day just the both of you to yourselves.”- Robin

——————————————————————-

“Bye!”- you

You closed the door and went over to the kitchen. You already got dressed for the day. Which was the first time you weren’t in your pjs in over a week. You decided to clean some baby bottles and put them in the dishwasher.

Joe came walking in with his beautiful smile plastered on his face.

“Hey, burrow!” You smiled

“Hey, Mrs Burrow! What are you doing?”- Joe

He then sat down on one of three kitchen stools.

“Well, I’m cleaning. I wanted to get it out of the way.”- You

“Well how about you come relax. You need it, y/n.”- joe smiled

“When I’m finished. I’m almost done!”- you

“Okay.”- Joe

Joe stayed there talking to you about upcoming projects and practices he has going on. It was nice to talk to him that wasn’t all baby related. Even though you love your sweet emma. It has just been a lot this past week and you needed a break from it.

After cleaning you decided to watch a movie with Joe. Both of you decided on Mr and Mrs Smith.

“Want to order something to eat?”- Joe

“Sure!”-you

“How about..”- Joe

“Sushi!”- you

“That’s what I was thinking!”- Joe

“Well, great minds think alike!”- you

He then pulled you in for a sweet kiss.

“I love you.”- Joe

“Love you too.”- you

“Ok, let’s order.”- Joe

You laughed and told him what you wanted.

You were so grateful to have such an amazing husband. He is a great father to your beautiful daughter. A new chapter just opened for you and Joe and you couldn’t wait to explore it with the man you love.

————————————————————————-

Authors note: HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! This goes out to all the mothers! It’s can be hard sometimes but always remember that people love and care about you!🩷

[teyamloving12]

Lemme Ease Your Pain

Warning: NSFW content(MDNI),lactation kink, mentions of post-pregnancy, praising, Olo'eyktan!Neteyam should be a warning lol, etc.

Pairing: Olo'eyktan!Neteyam (23) x Tsahik!Reader (21)

Synopsis: You gave birth a few days ago. Your babies aren't heavy feeders so your breasts become so full. You beg your mate to relieve you of your pain and of course Neteyam doesn't mind.

The entire village was in an uproar, the Tsahik just gave birth to twins. These children would live to know they were the children of the clan leader and the spiritual leader, grandchildren of Toruk Makto and Neytiri, and great-grandchildren of Mo'at. It was an extremely painful experience. You were afraid but all was fine because your mother-in-law and your darling husband were right beside you ever step of the way.

Your babies were beautiful, they looked exactly like the father. Neteyam smiles as rubbed your stomach. You painted harshly. It was not easy. Neytiri uses a wet cloth to wipe off the sweat upon your tired face. "You did well, my daughter!"n Neytiri said. You smiled mournfully because your throat were sore from the screams of pain and agony.

Once you heard the crying of your children you were just fine. Mo'at laid the babe on your chest while Neteyam held the other. A beautiful boy and a girl. Neteyam was overwhelmed by joy. Tears ran down his face and over to the baby's face making him surprisingly laugh. The baby grabbed one of Neteyam's braid and tugged it gently. You smiled at the baby girl that palmed your face with a smile. Neteyam named them Ateyo and Zraina.

A huge celebration was held for them. They bonded with the Tree of Souls. Neytiri massaged your shoulders to calm you down. Your heart was beating fast. Neteyam was a great Olo'eyktan and you tried your best to be a good Tsahik using the training you received from Mo'at and Neytiri.

Although you gave birth a few days ago, your breasts were really sore. The babies weren't heavy feeders which only made the situation worse. They were so full and were begging to milked out. Every night, you would wake up to your top soaking in milk. Neteyam listened in his sleep as you squirmed in discomfort. Neteyam pushed himself up and rubbed your waist.

"Ma syulang, what is wrong? You've been squirming all night.", Neteyam asked. You were panting heavily. He noticed something was wrong. His hands grazed over your top accidentally. Realizing his hand were soaked in milk, he realized the problem.

"Ma Neteyam, I am in pain. Please get me relief!", you managed to speak out how you felt. "What am I saying? That sounds disgusting! I'll do it myself.", you were about to get up until he held you by your hand and pulled you back. "You're my mate! If you're in pain, it is my responsibility to rid of it.", you were shocked.

"But Netey-", you tried to rebel against his word but he silenced you immediately. "Do not disobey me, syulang!", Neteyam whisper-yelled, slightly frightening you.

You sat on the edge of the bed as Neteyam laid his head on your thighs. You were ashamed of the situation you were in. He was your husband, yes, but this was not compared to what you two did when you were younger.

You threw your soaked top across the room. Neteyam stared intensely at your swollen breasts. The beads of milk fell upon his face making him curious. "Their damn babies wasted good stuff!", Neteyam said as he teased your sensitive nipple causing a small moan to slip out. "I've watched an entire nine month period for this, you know?", you were shocked. He wanted to do this. Neteyam was a strange man with multiple kinks.

Neteyam tweaked your nipples making a strong stream of milk to shoot upon his abs. He licked his lips. "Thanks for the meal, mama!", he said before attaching him hungrily upon your leaking nipple. He grabbed the other breast trying to ease you of your pain. You felt weird. Your cunt was aching. It's been months since you had any action. He swallowed the milk that was releasi g from you. It was sweet and flavorful. You came off your breasts making a pop sound.

You were panting. You were soaked. Neteyam could smell your heat at this point. "Come princess, give papa more milk. You wouldn't want me to die of thirst, right?", you knew how Neteyam was in bed. An animal that attacked its prey in the worst ways possible. He bit your nipples making you scream. " You taste delicious, baby! You could give me more, right? Not so hard. Make me the happiest man on Earth. The tips of your ears were turning red as he continued to tease you. "Neteyam you had to stop, the children will wake up!", you said trying to hold back the scream that was at your throat.

He loved the faces you made for him. The fact you were getting turned on by him just sucking out the excess milk in your swollen and sensitive breasts made him feel things. He loved your moans but you looked extremely tired. He stopped. You fell back on the bed. He kissed your neck down to the breasts.

"Gonna get you pregnant again, your milk tastes too sweet to be wasted!"

[daydreaming-nerd]

Young Love and Old Money (Cassian x Female! Reader) Part 9

Young Love and Old Money Masterlist

AN: Okay remember when I said there would be a lot more angst? Well here we are. We have arrived at angst station, everybody off the train. This part is so dramatic I really laid it on thick here. Regardless I hope you enjoy and I will try to get part 10 up ASAP!!!

Summary: She was the most beautiful woman in Prythian, sister to the High Lord of Night, and now she is the soon-to-be wife of Eris Vanserra. Despite her many titles and her aura of unattainability, Cassian can't help but fall deeply in love with the princess of the Night Court. But will it be enough to stop her impending wedding to a man who is sure to destroy her from the inside out?

Warnings: Sexism, super heavy angst, this got really dark, violence, blood, implied rape (but not described), did I mention violence?, (I'm sorry you guys.)

Word Count: 6,333

The next morning I wake up in my own bed and I don’t move for hours. 

Thankfully, after about an hour of crying by the Sidra, Azriel found me and took me back to the House of Wind.  Apparently Cassian had sent him, which gave me a little bit  of hope. That is until I went to his door and found his room empty. According to Azriel he left for Windhaven after returning home to pack a bag.  I didn’t need to interrogate further to know that Cassian wouldn’t be back before the wedding. 

I spent the entire day before the wedding in bed, staring at the sliver of light on the floor that the curtains let into the darkened room. Everytime I close my eyes I could hear Cassian and I’s laughter, which made me unable to fall asleep. When I wasn’t reminiscing over memories of Cassian I was listening intently to the sounds of the house, hoping I would hear his heavy boots thudding back to his room. I just wanted to see him one last time. 

However, those footsteps never came, and I found myself staring at the wall until my body gave up on me, from either exhaustion or hunger and I fell asleep.

Cassian’s pov: 

The second I landed in Windhaven I cracked open a bottle of whiskey and downed a glass praying it would allow me to sleep. Of course I was wrong. 

The entire night I saw images of y/n holding that little girl in her arms. God I had practically melted right then and there, thinking about what she would look like holding our own children. How adorable they would be with their tiny wings. 

My sleepless night had carried over with me the next day, everything and everyone putting me on edge. A young Illyrian had dropped their sword while sparring and I blew up at him. Devlon tried to argue that the females shouldn’t be training and I nearly slammed his head into a wall.

I was aggressively sharpening my swords on the edge of the sparring ring when Azriel found me, my brother simply  nodded his head towards the center as if to say “blow off some steam big fella.” I couldn’t turn him down, as he was the only one who could give me a run for my money, and today he sure did. 

“You fight like shit and you look like shit too brother,” Azriel barked after beating me again. He tossed his sword to the ground seemingly calling it quits for the day. 

“Yeah well my mate is about to marry another male in the next 12 hours so how did you expect to find me?” I gripe at him taking my seat on a weathered rock. 

“I suppose I wouldn’t know what to do in your situation either,” he admitted, taking a seat next to me. 

“Seems about right for me. Grew up a bastard and lived in the mud till you and Rhys’ sorry asses came along. Lost my mother and never even got to bury her, fought for 500 years, and then became mated to the princess, who is marrying another male.”  I scoff, shaking my head at the ridiculousness. “I’ll give the mother one thing, at least she’s consistent.”

Azriel was quiet for a moment, as if taking in what I had said before clapping a hand on my back, “The pain, it will go away Cass. It will take time, but I will be there with you every step of the way.” he assured me, and for a moment I felt a little lighter. 

“Get wasted with me tomorrow?” I ask more seriously than I should.

“You know I will,” he said, offering me a slight smile. 

I hoped that Rhys had gotten some more whiskey since the last time I raided his cabinet, because I don’t think any amount of drink could make me forget the way she looked at me the first morning we woke up together. The way she would laugh when I kissed her cheeks, the feeling of her delicate hands running soap over my wings. How she would say “you need a bath!” when I would give her a sweaty hug after training. The face she made when I distracted her from one of her romance novels by tickling her feet that rested in my lap.  

By the cauldron, I was a dead man. 

y/n's pov:

Stepping into the Autumn Court felt like I was walking to my own execution. Instead of Eris being at the end of that aisle there would be a guillotine. I almost wished for that instead. Any comment made by Rhys about how I seemed tired I chalked up to pre-wedding nerves and thankfully he didn’t push after that. 

The entire morning had been spent poking and prodding at my skin, my hair and my eyes.  If I thought that Nuala and Cerridwen were meticulous I was sorely mistaken. The ladies of the Autumn Court didn’t mess around and if this was my life going forward (which sadly it was), cauldron boil me. 

The ladies in wait primped me up until a half an hour before I walked down the aisle. I had to literally commande them out of my suite in order to have a moment alone. I sat staring at myself in the floor length mirror. For what it was worth, I looked beautiful. I half expected the dress that was chosen for me to be  awful and gaudy, however it was elegant. The lace along the neckline mimicking the flames associated with Eris’ power. Had I been walking down the aisle to a different groom, I might venture to say that I was excited to be married. However as I stared at myself in my white wedding dress I couldn’t help but feel a tear slide down my face. 

A tentative knock reverberated through the room, nearly making me jump out of my skin. I took a deep breath and wiped away a stray tear. 

“Come in,” I said with shaky words looking at the double oak doors through the mirror before me.

The door opened slowly, whoever it was looking around the room before entering. A large figure finally popped it’s head in, eyes finding me immediately. I would know that jet black hair anywhere. 

Cassian. 

I whirled around to meet his gaze as he shut the door, taking slow and tentative steps towards me. His eyes searched my face for any hint of anger or resentment. 

“Cass,” I breathed, as if to assure myself he was really there. 

“You look beautiful,” he smiled looking me up and down, but I could see the veiled sadness on his face. He was putting on a front, and a bad one at that.

“Thank you,” I say, taking a tentative step towards him. “How did you get in here?”

“They don’t have you that well guarded,” he chuckled, stepping closer till he stood before me. Neither of us reached for one another, unsure of where we both stood. It felt wrong not to instantly wrap my arms around him. “I don’t like where we left things,” he continued.

“Neither do I,”   

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I yelled at you that night. I’m sorry about the things I said,” he starts again. His hands reach for mine but pull back as if afraid to touch me. “I wanted to say that I understand now. And that I think you are incredibly brave to be doing this for Velaris. I’ll never be happy that you’re marrying Eris, and I’ll always wish it was me. But I understand now, and I respect the love you have for your people, and the lengths you’re willing to go to to keep them safe. Will you forgive me?” 

I feel the stray tear pricking my eye once more, “There was never anything to forgive Cass. I was more upset with myself for giving you false hope. For going along and loving you and acting like things were going to be alright when I couldn’t guarantee it.” I sigh, casting my head down, unable to face him.

I feel his gentle calloused hand tip my chin up to meet his gaze. His eyes, that beautiful hazel, glassed over. Despite it all, despite what I put him through, there is still so much love in them, and I know I’ll never really deserve it.

“Loving you was the greatest gift I’ve ever known, and ever will know,” he smiles as if he’s remembering the short time we did have together. “I’ll be here waiting if you should ever change your mind or in case something ever happens.” 

“Cass,” I start to protest but he stops me.

“I’ve loved you for so many years y/n. There can be no one else but you. If I don’t get to have you until we are both old and gray so be it. I’ve waited this long,” he assures me cupping my cheek.  

I don’t even have words to reply to his confession. Boundaries be damned. I threw myself around him pulling him as close as possible. His arms tighten around me like he had been waiting for me to make a move. In the embrace there’s an understanding, an unsaid agreement.

I back away to see those hazel eyes once more, my own eyes raking over his body. I notice he’s not dressed in a fine suit jacket, or even his fighting leathers. Instead, he’s donning a loose fitted shirt, something completely unfit for a royal wedding. 

“You’re not staying are you?” I ask, pressing a hand to his stubbled cheek that tells me he didn’t shave this morning.

“No, I just had to see you one last time,”  he answers, taking my hand from his cheek so he could hold both of them. 

The weight of his words shoot right through me, and as I look at him, I let them sink in. I watched as a tear slid down his own cheek, it was the only time I had ever seen the general cry. 

“One last time,” I repeated, letting the words consume me. 

His eyes glanced down at my lips, a silent plea to taste them again,

“Can I?” he whispered. 

“Gods yes,” I sigh. 

A hand drifted up cupping my cheek and pulling me into a kiss. The last kiss we might ever share. I poured every ounce of love into it trying to give him something to remember me by, trying to savor every moment of it for when my days ahead were darkest. My chest heaved as if being pulled forward and then…

Snap.

It was as if a piece of me was returned, one I never knew I lost. I pulled back to meet his gaze and by the way he looked at me I could tell he knew, had known. I felt like I was truly seeing him for the first time as that shimmering golden bond glowed between us.

“You’re my-” I started but I jumped at the bang sounding throughout the room. 

My eyes met the fiery auburn of Eris’ as he entered the room, at least twenty autumn court soldiers behind him. I didn’t have time to step away as he winnowed to me pulling me away from Cassian. 

“You!” he seethed at my general who was already assessing the situation. “I had my suspicions but never the proof and you fell into my trap so easily.” he boasted.  

My thoughts scrambled to what Cassian had said earlier…”They don’t have you that well guarded.”

“Restrain the bastard!” Eris ordered his grip on my arm tightening at the command. 

“No!” I screamed lurching for Cassian but Eris hauled me back to him. 

The soldiers were on him in an instant all of them falling like dominos before The Lord of Bloodshed. Cassian’s eyes blazed with a fury by the likes of which I had never seen before, he wasn’t a general protecting his princess. He was a male protecting his mate. 

Eris’ body tensed behind mine as soldier after soldier fell. In an act of desperation I felt him unsheathe the dagger at his thigh, pressing the blade to my throat. 

“Oh general,” Eris sang. 

It was enough to catch Cassian’s attention for a split second, his eyes widening as he saw the position I was in. A  rogue soldier used the small window of time to pull his dagger and stab it through Cassian’s side. 

“NO!” I screamed as Cassian hissed, his knees hitting the floor. Immediately the rest of the soldiers were on him, restraining him and binding his wings. His siphons tried to come to light but sputtered out.

“Bloodbane,” Eris smiles, lowering the dagger from my throat. “Stings like a bitch doesn’t it?” 

“Eris please, don’t do this. He’s my mate, I didn’t know until now and-” 

“I would choose your next words very carefully, pet,” he cuts me off. “Right now your ‘mate’ has been stabbed with a dagger laced in bloodbane, which means that even if your dear brother did know he was here he couldn't communicate with him. As for Rhysand, he now sits in a wedding chapel completely unaware and unarmed with a bloodbane arrow aimed for his fucking throat. And last time I checked the only asset you had was a magic cunt.” 

Cassain growled from the other side of the room at Eris’ vulgar words. My eyes flitted to where he was pulling against the restraints. 

“However, I consider myself a merciful ruler,” Eris taunted, grabbing my face to meet his stare. “I’ll give you a choice. You either walk down that aisle, be a good little wife, and pop out a couple of heirs as promised, or you call off the wedding and I’ll gut your precious general where he kneels.” 

“y/n, no!” Cassian gritted through bared teeth. 

I watched my mate struggle to break free, the bloodbane in his system beginning to take over. I looked to Eris who stared at me with hungry eyes. I tried to think of some way out of this, but Eris was right. We had fallen right into this trap, and my hands were tied.

My gaze met Cassian who could read my face like a book, “I’m sorry Cassian, but I once told you that I could never live with myself if something happened to you and I had the power to stop it.” I turn to face Eris and his shit eating grin. “If you promise not to hurt him, or my brother, I will go with you.” 

“You will submit to me fully?” Eris asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes,” I nod, my mind flashing back to when Rhys was in the same position. 

Eris steps closer to me, tilting my head up in an act of dominance, his mouth too close to mine for comfort. I could hear Cassian’s grunts as he continued to try and break free. 

“And you’ll warm my cock whenever I please?” he muses, clearly loving the control he has over me. 

“Yes,” I grit. 

He smiled triumphantly, releasing my chin as he turned to his guards, “Take him away and lock him in the dungeons.” 

“You said-”

“When you walk down that aisle and say ‘I do’ then I shall send him back to the Night Court, Jewel of Prythian. I won’t be taking any chances.” Eris growls in my face before turning to Cassian who had now been brought to his feet. “If I ever see you in my court, or anywhere near my wife again Prince of Bastards, I will make sure that she pays the price.” 

“You fucking bastard!” Cassian roars, body nearly limp from the bloodbane as he’s hauled off by the guards. 

“Wait, let me say goodbye!” I cry running to him, but I’m yanked back by my arm so roughly it nearly pops out of its socket.

“Your obedience begins now!” Eris grits but I pay him no mind thrashing about in his grasp trying to touch my mate once last time as he disappears behind the oak doors. 

“Cassian!” I scream for him, tears waterfalling over my eyes.

“y/n!” he shouts back. 

But it’s too late. The doors close with a definite slam and I’m left weeping in Eris’ grasp as I hear the sounds of Cassian struggling down the hall. 

Cassian’s pov: 

Eris was right, the bloodbane hurt like a bitch. Even an hour later as I sat on the cold, wet floor of the Autumn Court cell, the toxin still made me feel lethargic. As if I had taken the world's strongest sleeping tonic. 

The worst part of it all was that I could hear everything. The organ playing signaling that y/n was walking down the aisle and the cheers of the people as they finally said their vows. The worst and loudest of them all were the bells. 

They rang with such clarity, and joy. The happy little melody could be heard from everyone in the Autumn Court, announcing that the Eris and y/n were finally wed.  The ringing made me double over with grief, their sound a reminder that I was the only male in Prythian who could not protect his mate. A shame greater than being a bastard, and one I would carry with me until the end of my days. 

Metal on metal screeched from somewhere in the dungeon as a light poured in. The jingling of keys and stomping of boots stopped at the door to my cell and I didn’t even bother to look up. Nothing mattered anymore anyways. 

“Come on ‘Prince of Bastards’, time for you to go back to your own court,” the guard grumbled, like hauling me home was a huge inconvenience to him. 

I rose to my feet and stepped languidly out of the door. The restraints on my wrists and wings  were removed, the skin on my wrists rubbed raw from the blue stone shackles. I was led up the stairs to where the wards ended and was immediately winnowed to the border of the Autumn and Winter Court. The cold blizzards of winter whipping around us and chilling my wings. 

“Prince Eris has asked me to remind you that you are now banished from this court. He also says that should you choose to seek out his wife once more you know what the consequences will be.” the guard relayed. 

Before I could even think about punching the asshole square in his jaw he disappeared into thin air, no doubt going back to his post in the basement of the palace.

I was left with nothing but the sound of my own thoughts, and the feelings of my own guilt as I flew home towards the House of Wind where I knew Azriel was waiting. The flight was the longest one I had ever been on, as normally I took this route with y/n in my arms.

 I had never been so happy to touch down on solid ground once more. Azriel tentatively walked out onto the balcony, two glasses of whiskey in hand. His shadows told him that something was very wrong. 

“What the hell happened?” He asked, an alarm ringing in his voice. 

The lump in my throat returns as I remember how it all went down.  “The bond snapped for her, and she changed her mind. Eris found us, said he had set the whole thing up. I was stabbed with a bloodbane dagger,” I say, lifting my arm to assess the blood leaking from my side. “He told her that if she didn’t marry him he would gut me and Rhys.” 

The next words teeter on my lips as I feel my eyes brimming with tears. It felt like pieces of me were being ripped out as I finally confessed to my failure. 

“I couldn’t save her,” I choked out, voice cracking halfway through. 

The words being uttered into the world was enough to have my  knees crashing to the ground. The impact radiating through my body to the open wound on my side that still hadn’t healed.  I was sure that Azriel had said something as I heard the glasses of whiskey clatter to the ground. But the roaring in my ears was so loud, so unbearable, that the only thing that assured me he was still there was the arm he slung around my back as he knelt next to me.  

y/n’s pov:

The wedding was uneventful and to be honest the only part of it I remembered was when the priestess said, “If there is anyone present who can show just cause why these two may not be joined in matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.” 

The silence that had fallen upon the crowd was so deafening I nearly shuddered. I was stupid to hope that he would come charging in like some fairytale I had read as a child.  The smug look on Eris' face as the priestess continued with the nuptials made my blood go cold. 

The reception was even worse. I had spent the entire time sipping wine with a bland expression on my face. It seemed as though Eris’ new favorite word was ‘wife’ considering he found a way to use it in every sentence.  While most would think it a term of endearment I knew it was just to show his ownership.

“Prince Eris, congratulations on stealing ‘The Jewel’ from us all,” a voice said, cutting across the sea of chatter. I looked up from my lap to find the High Lord of Spring, standing before our table. 

“Thank you Tamlin, she is quite the prize,” Eris crooned, placing a kiss to the back of my hand. 

“That she is,” Tamlin nodded, his eyes raking me from head to toe. “Almost makes me regret crossing her brother, I would’ve liked to have been in the race for her hand.” 

“All in the past now,” Eris smiles, kissing the palm of my hand.  “Right wife?” 

“Right,” I nod to him before turning to Tamlin. “High Lord, where is the Cursebreaker tonight? I would’ve liked to make my acquaintance.” I ask secretly hoping that my brother might catch a glimpse of his mate tonight. 

“Feyre is,” he averts his gaze from mine as if trying to decide what to say. “She is safe at home. Busily planning for the wedding.” 

“The wedding?” I inquired further, wondering if Rhys knew.

“Yes we are to be wed soon,” Tamlin beamed with pride. “I’m sure we will see you both present?” 

“Of course Tamlin, of course,” Eris assured the High Lord of Spring. 

Surely if Feyre was getting married to Tamlin my brother knew. I hoped I would get the chance to tell him. The last thing our court, well I suppose his court now, needed was another separation of mates. 

The rest of the night passed on quite slowly. At one point I was able to feel the bond between Cassian and I. It was faint, but it was there, and I almost swore that I felt him tug on it at one point. It wasn’t until people started making their excuses to go home that Eris finally said the words I had been dreading. 

“Shall we go to bed, wife?” he mused his lips brushing the shell of my ear. 

“After I say goodbye to my brother,” I nod standing up to find Rhys, wherever he was. 

“You’ll see your brother soon enough, my pet. For now let us retire to our chambers,” he growled, grasping my arm and winnowing away to what I assumed was his room.

He watched intently from behind me as I took in my surroundings. 

The bed was large, draped in furs and crisp white sheets. Wood paneling surrounded the four walls, giving the place an ornate look. The fireplace was a glow, casting a warm light upon the room. If it had been anyone else’s room it would’ve been cozy, maybe even romantic. 

The air filled with tension as I waited for Eris to do something, or say something, as I refused to turn and meet his gaze. The only sound heard was the crackling of the fire. 

“I’ve waited for this moment for quite a long time,” Eris mused from where I knew he was leaning against the door. 

“You’ve made that abundantly clear throughout our courtship,” I say straight, unable to meet his predatory stare.  

“How should I have acted when you are so tempting? So innocent, so pure, and now so completely mine,” he purred and I could hear his feet shuffle as he pushed off the wall. “And now that you’ve promised me your submission? Well,” he chuckled. “I’m going to have a great deal of fun with you.” 

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I knew what was coming and I knew he wouldn’t be gentle and loving like Cassian. I knew that once again my hands were tied.  

“Tell me you belong to me,” Eris uttered, taking a step closer to where I stood rigid. 

I sucked down the lump in my throat, “I belong to you,” I whispered.

“Tell me you want me to touch you,” he went on, taking another step forward, his presence looming. 

“I-I want you to touch me,” I repeated back, a tear slipping down my cheek.

Eris hummed in approval behind me. He took one, two more steps until I felt his warmth at my back. Finger tips danced up and down the backs of my arms causing my breath to lurch in fear. His breath was hot on my neck as his presence sucked out every bit of air from the room. 

“Tell me you love me,” he purred. 

My heart stopped cold. There were many things I would have to do or say to please Eris in the millennium that I would be tied to him. But these three words? He would never hear them from my lips. Maybe towards our children, but never to him. 

“You know it wouldn't be true,” I whisper, feeling the tension radiating from his body. 

His hands grip my hips like a brand, ripping my body around until I am face to face with his seething eyes. 

“Then I will make it fucking true!” he growls hauling my mouth to his. 

Eris had kissed me a thousand times before, not one of those times did I ever enjoy the experience. But this time? This had to be the worst. All of it felt so wrong.  Knowing I had a mate. Knowing he was somewhere in this world right now. It made me sick. It was rough, all teeth and tongues. He didn’t want to kiss me, he wanted to devour me.  

“Say it!” Eris demanded, breaking apart our so-called kiss.

“I will love your hounds and your mother, I may love your brothers and one day our children, but I will never love you, Eris Vanserra,” I seethed, unable to take much more. 

I expected him to growl, or curse or hit me. I expected a thorough lashing for what I had said, but he didn’t even so much as flinch. What scared me more? His mouth curled up in a smirk. 

“You forget that you are also a Vanserra now and speaking of heirs, I think it’s time I put one in you right now,” he mused and my stomach bottomed out. “What do you say ‘Jewel of Prythian’ think I can get you knocked up on the first try?” he smiled, backing me to his bed.

There were no words for the terror I felt. No handbook to prepare me for what came next. All I could do was shut down every emotion I had and do my best to become a ghost. A shell of myself. 

No matter how hard I tried, it didn’t subdue the pain. 

Azriel’s pov: 

I thought that getting Cass drunk might help distract him from the feelings floating down the bond tonight, but boy was I fucking wrong. 

I had seen my brother lose soldiers and whole infantries. Had seen him lose his first love, the valkyrie, Tanwyn. I was there the day Rhys and y/n went under the mountain and we thought we lost them for good. 

None of that compared to the screams of agony that emanated from the male before me. 

“He’s fucking hurting her!” Cassian bemoaned, gripping the nearly empty bottle of whiskey. 

It didn’t take much to figure out that he could feel everything y/n was feeling through the bond. And at this late hour? It wasn’t hard to guess what Eris was doing to her, and Cassian had to feel every moment of it down the bond.

“Shh calm down Cass you have to try and block her out,” I pleaded with him, gripping his hand in mine. 

His eyes were glassed over, his hair tangled from him nearly ripping it out at the roots. He had been like this for well over an hour now, and I almost wished the whiskey would do its job and make him fall asleep simply so he would be unconscious. 

“I can’t Az I’ve tried,” he yells at me, nearly slumping to the side from where he sat on the floor leaning against the wall. 

Earlier Rhys had spoken into my mind and asked if everything was alright. I had lied of course, telling him everything was fine, not wanting to insert myself in my brother and the princess’ business. Now I wished I had told him to come if only for him to break into Cass’ head and make him sleep. Watching him feel everything his mate was feeling while she was being… well there weren’t words for it. 

“Breathe Cass, breathe,” I soothed, trying to get him to catch his breath long enough to breathe in and out fully. 

“I-I can’t,” he cried. “My mate.” 

His voice resonated with hopelessness and brokenness, reminiscent of the tragedies depicted in literature. This situation felt nothing short of hellish. For centuries, I longed for a mate—a bond that every fae yearned for. But witnessing how it tormented Rhysand, and observing its impact on Cassian, made me question if I truly desired a mate. In my 500 years of life, I had never seen a male stripped down to his core as profoundly as this.

y/n’s pov:

The next morning I woke up late in the day, the atrocities of last night lasting well into the early hours of the morning. It took me a moment to get my bearings. I wasn’t in the House of Wind, I was in Eris’ room. It wasn’t Cassian’s arms around me in a possessive grasp, it was Eris’.

I slowed my heartrate down enough to assess the room around me. Behind me, Eris was fast asleep, which meant I had a few moments to collect myself before he woke. I looked around the room for a second space and found a door ajar that appeared to lead to a bathroom. I saw my opportunity and took it, carefully wiggling out of Eris’ grasp. 

My body ached all over, especially between my legs, but I pushed through until I stood from the bed. I tiptoed over to the bathroom, shutting the door as quietly as possible.  Thankfully there were two robes hung on the door. The one for Eris made up of thick cotton, and the one for me made of a cream colored silk. 

I reached for the silk robe and slipped it over my bare body, noting every large bruise and handprint that littered my skin. A problem for a later time, I told myself. 

I must’ve spent fifteen minutes in the bathroom collecting myself. Constantly repeating my new found mantra. 

I will not cry.

I will not cry.

I will not cry.

I spent so long taking deep breaths that I thought I was prepared for whatever came next. But the second I opened the door and saw Eris standing, staring down at the white sheets of the bed expectantly I knew I was sorely mistaken.

“You didn’t bleed,” Eris stated, tossing the bedsheets aside, stalking towards me. 

“What do you mean?” I replied feigning innocence like I didn’t know what he meant. 

My heart began to beat out of my chest as Eris stalked closer and closer to me. How could I have been so stupid? To overlook the one thing that meant the most to him in this entire facade.  

“Virgins are supposed to bleed the first time they are taken by a male, yet you didn’t,” he growled, stepping into my bubble as my back hit the wall. Never in my life had I felt so small.  “Which means you weren’t pure when you married me, or when you came to my bed.” 

Every nerve in my body froze over as I watched him put together the pieces. There was no telling what happened next, and the only thing I could do was beg for mercy from whatever plans Eris had for a soiled female. 

“Eris I-” 

“Did you let that Illyrian bastard deflower you?” he gritted out, a rough hand came to grip my  throat, slamming my head against the wall. 

Tears pricked my eyes. Even if I had wanted to answer, the hand on my neck wouldn’t allow me. I could only shake in terror and anticipation of what would become of me. 

“You useless, pathetic fucking whore.” he gritted, hand squeezing tighter with every insult. “Our marriage is now null and void by the traditions of my court, which means you no longer have the protection of being called my wife.” 

His hand releases my throat and I have mere seconds to suck down a breath before a harsh slap falls across my cheek, knocking the air from my lungs once again. The next thing I know I’m kneeling on the floor, clutching my face. Eris reaches out a hand to yank me up by my hair. 

“Let me show you what we do to ran through sluts in my court,” Eris spits in my face. 

His hand doesn’t relinquish its grip from my hair. Instead it begins to drag me out of the room and down the hall. My scalp is burning from the tug on my hair. He takes a back corridor reserved for servants and my bare knees bump, slice and break on the rough stone stairs leading down to wherever he’s taking me.

My hands try to find purchase on the walls around me so that I can ground myself and fight back but it’s impossible. 

“ERIS PLEASE!” I scream, but my pleas fall on deaf ears. 

We reach a basement room that drops in temperature and he finally releases me. I try to catch my breath as I watch him scribble something on a piece of paper, picking up a hammer and nail. I instantly go to cower in a corner as he walks towards me. The autumn prince pulls me out of my fetal position by my  ankles pinning me to the ground beneath his weight. 

“In case I did get you pregnant on the first try,” he seethes before I feel a sharp pain to my lower abdomen. 

I don’t look down, I can’t look down. Afraid of what I might see there when I do. My eyes roll to the back of my head as Eris grasps my arm and a cloud of darkness washes over us. 

When the shadow withdraws my bare skin is whipped and flayed by blistering cold winds. The ground beneath me is soft, but ice cold. I open my eyes long enough to see white as far as the eye can see. 

The Winter Court. 

“And just  in case you get any ideas about utilizing that so-called mating bond,” Eris speaks again before another sharp sting plunges into my side. 

White hot pain spreads from the intrusion and spreads like acid moving through my veins. I feel like the blood beneath my skin is on fire, and I almost wish it was in order to combat the blizzard around me. Only one thing could disable me like this, bloodbane. The very same used on Cassian.

“You’ve brought this upon yourself, ‘Jewel of Prythian’. I hope that bastard general was worth your life and your court. Because when Hybern comes to call it won’t be Autumn Court armies that come to your aid.” Eris says, the disgust in his voice evident. 

I can’t speak, can’t even think about anything but the agony I feel. The throb from my lower abdomen and from my side. The bite of the wind and snow on my bare skin. I can barely register the cloud of darkness as Eris winnows himself away, leaving me with nothing but a silk robe for warmth. 

I reached down with a cold hand to rip the dagger from my side. I hoped if I could stop the bloodbane from spreading that I might be able to use the bond to call Cassian. The second I discard the dagger blood stains the white snow surrounding me, and I realize my mistake. My hand grasps at the open wound, attempting to apply pressure. As I sat there, bleeding and freezing to death I thought of one thing. 

It was all for nothing.

All the pain, all the suffering. Hurting Cassian, hurting myself. It had all been for nothing. I was dying and alone, fingers and toes already losing feeling and I still had no army for my people. Cassian nowhere in sight to save my body and my soul. And I would die here knowing that it was all for nothing. 

Because time was of the essence, and no one was coming.

Part 10

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[romanstheory]

Midnight Flowers a Damian Priest One Shot

Warnings: language, smut, public sex, drinking

Word count: 1,630

Inspired By: Midnight Sky & Flowers by Miley Cyrus

The music in this club vibrates through me, I can feel it in my bones. The intoxicating boom on the base through this place always leaves me wanting more. My skin tight black dress leaves very little to the imagination as my hips sway to the beat of the music. Eyes closed, head back, enchanted. I've been single now for a month, and damn it's been the best month of my life. No begging for attention, no worrying about if he's sleeping around, no crying myself to sleep. I broke things off with Luis... Damian last time he was home from being on the road a month ago. I spent 4 years shackled to him just trying to hold on to see if it would get better.

Stupid is what I was because it never did get any better. The beginning was like magic, something you read about in a book but then he got a push from WWE and it felt like he himself had changed. He had tunnel vision on what he wanted and I became an afterthought. But none of that matters anymore, i can be free by myself. No him, no WWE, no crying myself to sleep or wondering if I'm enough. Because I am more than enough, I always was. I buy myself the flowers he wouldn't, take myself on the dates he thought were stupid, watch the shows he ignored.

He was the perfect partner until he.... Wasn't and I realized that I deserved more, I DESERVE more. So I ended it and I walked away before he could respond or I could take back what I had just done. I walked away and I never looked back. I cried myself to sleep that night, my body ached in every way possible, my heart shattered. "It's for your own good" I told myself over and over again until I believed it. Now I believe it as I dance in this club freely belonging to no one. The song switches which is the only reason I break from the trance the music hold over me. Slowly I open my eyes before going to the bar for one more drink. "I'll take a lemon drop and my tab!" I say sweetly to the bartender, he gives me a nod in return.

I hear people around me gasping and talking amongst each other, but I choose to scroll on my phone and sip my sweetly bitter drink. Someone sits next to me, again I choose to ignore it, probably just a sloppy drunk man ready to shoot his shot. Though I wouldn't blame him I am painfully uninterested in entertaining anyone tonight least of all a sloppy drunk man I'll have to baby and care for. "I'll just take whatever beer you have on draft" A deep voice rumbles next to me. Is it... no, it couldn't be right? It's been a month since I've seen him, surely this isn't a random pit stop. "You look good" The voice rumbles again. I peek out of the corner of my eye, refusing to face him, and of course there he is in all of his asshole glory.... Damian Priest.

"I know" I reply cooly before taking a big sip of my drink. He chuckles before shaking his head "Nice to see you too". I roll my eyes before gulping down the rest of my drink, I'm about to need it. "You never told me why you broke up with me" Damian says before drinking deeply from his glass "You just kind of dipped out". Anger burns deep within me before my head finally snaps over to him. Beautiful, he's so fucking beautiful I hate it. His hair is slicked back in a bun, his beard freshly trimmed, and he smells masculine with some hints of floral nodes. "I didn't think I needed to, my reasons seemed pretty in your face".

"Why are you here?" My voice dry and monotone "I was having a great time until you got here". His eyes catch my breasts before moving down to the rest of my body, and back up again to my face. Chugging his beer until the glass is empty he holds my stare again "I had some extra time, thought I could find you here so I came". Damian's mouth opens before closing again as if he's trying to figure out the words he wants to say "Can we go on a walk?". I stare at him for a long moment before replying "Pay for my tab and I'll walk". A nod is Damian's response before paying for both of our drinks. My head sings with the sweet buzz of alcohol, enough to make me okay with this stupid ass walk I'm about to go on.

The summer air brushes against my exposed skin as we begin our walk. Our stupid ass walk. "So?" I ask, refusing to look him in his stupid beautiful face. "So..." He replies. Oh fuck me... Here we go with this again. "Why are you here anyway? Why choose tonight to ruin my night?" Anger laced with sadness fills my gut. Sharply exhaled through his nose "I just... wanted to see you is that okay? Does it even matter?". Abruptly I stop walking "Yeah it fucking matters! I haven't seen you since I broke up with you Luis" My voice amplifies with every word. "Damn wanna be a little louder? I don't think they can hear you down the block" Damian's jaw twitches with what I assume is embarrassment.

"Why didn't you fight for me? Was I just not worth fighting for?" The words pour out of my mouth before I can stop them. "Was our relationship not worth fighting for?". Truthfully, by the time I ended things there was not relationship left to fight for. But that didn't stop me from wanting him to say... something... anything. "You were always worth fighting for. I just didn't see it until you were already gone" His hands lay loose at his side like he's awaiting defeat. "I know" My voice is just above a whisper because that's the only way my lips will allow it to escape. "I know I was always worth fighting for but you convinced me I hadn't been... And now I know I don't need you to be loved".

His head hangs in defeat for only a breath before his long legs close the distance between us, before he pulls me into an alley. "Luis what the fu-" His lips meet mine before I can finish. Melting, I'm fucking melting into the kiss. Oh I hate him but my body aches for him, leaning deeper into the kiss. "I know you don't need me, I'm glad you don't but I need you... Right now I need you" His voice is so deep it rumbles like thunder against my lips. "If you won't accept my apology then let me fuck you so you know I mean it". My body sings with excitement. He may have not been a good boyfriend, but he fucks like his life depends on it, and I am more than willing to allow it even in this alley.

"You better fuck me good, and fast before somebody sees us" I purr into his ear. That was all he needed, he was pulling at his belt and lifting my dress before I could take my next breath. Sliding my panties to the side he pushes his thick hard member against my entrance. Damian plants soft bites along my jaw and neck forcing soft moans out of my mouth. Damian grips my my thighs, putting my back against the cold brick wall before pushing into me with one stroke. A yelp escapes me "Shhh mami don't get the fun cut short" He purrs into my neck

My legs tighten around his waist as I bite my bottom lip to keep another moan from escaping me. Over and over again he pushes his long thick length into me, massaging every inch of me. "I missed this, missed you" He purrs again "Nobody feels like you, mami" His accent sends my head spinning, his grip on my thighs tighten, fingers digging in so rough I'm sure it'll leave a mark. "Nobody fucks me like you" I whisper, the words seems to be ammunition for him because he pounds into me harder, faster, deeper. I squeal again "Mami tranquila, you'll ruin the fun" A devilish grin spreads across his stupid face.

He sucks on my neck, leaving red marks behind, is he trying to make his territory? Do I care? Does anyone else? My climax is imminent, but I don't want it to end. I rock my hips back and forth edging myself on, our hips colliding over and over again. A low grumble escapes him before he throws his head back. "Fuck" He groans low. Over and over I rock my hips into him, massaging my sensitive space. Warmth fills me before my body is in pure ecstasy. Light flashes and my vision blurs before he pushes into me deeply, growling like some sort of wild animal, releasing his load deeply into me. Quickly he puts my down and we fix ourselves still panting like wild animals. He looks at me, those once lust-filled eyes now coated with thick sorrow and longing. "I really am sorry" He says after a long pause. "I know" I say before walking away, leaving him in the alley alone. I don't belong to anyone not even Damian Priest... Luis... whatever the fuck he wants to be called. I fix my hair as I walk down the sidewalk, a smirk smeared across my face. Damn, that felt good.

[vroomvroomcircuit]

Do Not Enter is written on the Doorway

(A/N): A personal thank you to @foreveralbon for reading over certain parts and give feedback and ideas

Summary: Max helps his girlfriend through her anticipatory grief

Warnings: Talking about the future death of a family member, this is sad, but Max is the greatest comforter

Wordcount: 2.3k

🏎Masterlist🏎 ______________________________

Some news gives you this warm feeling in your stomach that slowly spreads over your chest and into your head and extremities. You smile, your brain barely able to keep up with the immense joy you feel. It’s like you could hug the whole world at once, this feeling giving you superpowers beyond imagination. That immense excitement, that’s a feeling you never want to lose.

This is what good news gives you.

But nobody talks about the stabbing pain you get in your heart upon receiving bad news. The sudden 100 pounds heavy weight settling into your stomach. The coldness you feel in your hands and feet never are mentioned. The spinning in your head, having to realize that after hearing what you have been just told, nothing will ever be the same.

You immediately wish to be the person you were moments ago, before your brain chemistry has been changed forever. Nothing is better than being in that beautiful bliss of unsuspectingness. But you can’t go back, you only get to mimic being that person in the first few moments after waking up, before the memory sets back in. The damage has been irreversibly done.

This feeling after receiving bad news is the one (Y/N) has been most familiar with during the last couple of weeks. One of her close family members is terminally ill and they are in a state where their symptoms are only managed after being taken into hospice care almost immediately upon receiving the diagnosis. They will be sick for the rest of their life expectancy.

For her, it’s like jumping through burning hoops with a broken leg every day ever since. She wants to be a good daughter to her mother, who relies on her for support. (Y/N) wants to be the good family member she usually is, spending as much time with them as possible.

But she also wants to be a good girlfriend to her Max. She wants to be with him at every race, cheer for his successes and support him through his losses.

Being all that and staying on top of her own feelings, that is not doable.

Max sees it. He sees the circles under her eyes grow. He sees the hunch in her back, yet the tension in her shoulder. He can’t remember the last time she smiled at him with those smiles that take his breath away and make him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Max misses her laugh, always sounding like music to her.

He sees it all, but feels helpless. Powerless. Something he swore to himself to never be again. This ever so disabling feeling, making your limbs heavy and your heart sink every time you think about it. And your brain never stops thinking about it. It’s going over and over again about the situation, trying to find an angle where he can finally get through to her. But everything he tries feels for naught.

In the moments where he hears her cry in the middle of the night, thinking Max is soundly asleep without a single worry, he is thankful to never have to experience what his girlfriend is currently going through. So he tries to make it better, even if it is just coming from a distant place, since she doesn’t let him close, neither emotionally nor physically.

During nights spent crying, Max turns around to her and hugs her closely to his chest, acting like he just needs his partner cuddled to him in his sleep. He takes over all the household chores, claiming “Oh, I just saw that we needed to wash a few clothes” or “I had some downtime, so I tried to make myself useful” not wanting to shame (Y/N) for lacking.

Because if your head is full of emotions, there is no strength left to do physical things. Max knows that out of personal experience, from a life where you are constantly under extreme pressure.

Still, he tries to get through to (Y/N), missing the person he fell in love with. “Hey, I thought about going out for dinner tonight? Just you and me at your favorite place with that dress you love so much?” Max asks her as she puts her shoes on to run off to work. He is hopeful, it’s an offer she never has said no to. On the contrary, he kind of expects her to let the second shoe in her hand fall to the ground to put her arms around his neck and thank him over and over again.

But to his shock, she does no such things. The young woman puts the other shoe on and shakes her head. “I don’t feel like going out at the moment. I will stay late at the hospice anyway after work, the doctor said that-” Her voice cracks. Max steps towards her, but she waves him off. “We don’t have much time left. And I want to take the time to prepare for, you know, it.”

Max nods, even though he does not understand her point. Not yet at least.

(Y/N) presses a quick kiss to his cheek before exiting the house in what seems like a great rush. She leaves a flabbergasted dutchman behind.

This was the first kiss he hasn’t initiated for several weeks now (22 days to be exact, although who's counting?). But the subject of preparing for someone’s death still doesn’t let him go. Not when he feeds the cats and cleans the kitchen. Not when he trains for the upcoming race on the simulator and in the gym.

The thought of trying to prepare for the inevitable is unfathomable to him. Isn’t the fear of getting stuck in your head greater than missing the current moment with that person?

His mind still circulates around this topic when he unfreezes some pre-made meals that are with his diet and to (Y/N)’s taste. He knows not to warm hers up already, he made that mistake quite a few times, just for the food to turn cold while it is waiting to be consumed by her.

Their habit of eating all to most meals together diminished to one dinner once every other week. That’s something else he misses. Just spending quality time with his partner. Still, he does not want to be demanding towards her. He is understanding of her situation and knows that it won’t be like this forever.

He already sits at his computer set up, playing a few rounds of a game to calm down before going to bed when (Y/N) enters their quarters. Max immediately greets her, clocking in the exhaustion in her face. “Hey, welcome back!” He softly says. “I’ll heat up your dinner. You can take a shower or a bath. Or sit down in the living room and put a show on. I’ll bring you your food.”

But (Y/N) just stares at him. He halts in his tracks, waiting for her answer. But he never gets one. Instead, his girlfriend bursts out in tears, sobs and snot.

Quickly Max gathers her in his arms, gently rocking her while drawing circles on her back with his fingers. He tries to maneuver them onto the couch in the living room, getting her sat in his lap with her legs straddling his thighs.

Now, to say the Dutchman is shocked by that outburst would be a lie. He has seen how much (Y/N) ran herself into the ground. It was just a question of time when all of the built up emotions found their way out. Between wanting to be the perfect daughter and the perfect family member, she forgot to be her imperfect self.

Yet, Max hasn’t expected today to be the day. Today has been so unassuming. There were no visible signs during their morning that could have prepared Max for the breakdown.

Not that he needed to prepare in the first place. Max has every tool he needs for this exact situation in close proximity. He throws a heavy blanket over them and hands (Y/N) a stuffie that coincidentally found its home permanently on that couch a few weeks ago. The plush lion itself is weighted with beans, being a nice pressure on her chest.

He continues to rock them back and forth and murmurs sweet things into her ears. His hands draw soothing circles and other shapes on her back. At one point he starts to trace letters.

“I love you too”, (Y/N) mumbles into his hair, her voice still tear stricken. “I love you so much, I can’t imagine a world without you or your support or your love or your… everything.” Max tightens his hold on her. She knows how to interpret that one. It’s his non-verbal way of saying how much she means to him.

They sit there for several more minutes in silence with Max listening to her breathing evening out. “Do you want some tea? I stocked up on your favorites. I can heat up your dinner during that.” The young woman nods yes, sliding off his lap and cuddles into the corner of the couch.

Max quickly puts the tv on, leaving on some random show to stop the eerie silence and quieten down the thought spiral in (Y/N)’s head.

He tries to be as fast as possible, until his phone rings. His girlfriend sent him a message, asking if they can share that frozen meal. Max’s heart clenches, realizing they finally have another dinner together. Of course, he obeys her wish and brings two forks along with two mugs on a tablet to the living room.

“Here is the food and drinks and I got some of your favorite chocolate earlier”, he says in a soft voice. (Y/N) smiles, his thoughtfulness is enough to change her mood.

In unity they share the meal and catch up over peas and carrots. With mugs in their hands they cuddle close to each other and pay attention to the movie that’s playing as soon as the food is gone.

“I’m scared to lose them. But I am even more scared to forget to cherish the time we still have together.” (Y/N) starts speaking into the dimmed room. Max looks down to her, showing his girlfriend has 100 % of his attention.

“You know, it hurts to see them hurting. And I know they will only get worse, which is weird to know. I am already hurting from an event that hasn’t even taken place. We also know that they will die soon. And I am already grieving them. I sit in the same room with them, talk and laugh and think ‘this will not be possible very soon’ and it is so… fucked up. Because I don’t want to think about this, they are still here. But I already miss them. I miss the old version of them, I will miss the current version of them and I’m dreading their future version. And I am hurting all the time and I kind of don’t want to see them, because how they are right now is the way I want to remember them. I feel selfish, because it’s all just about me meanwhile they are literally dying under our hands.”

Max realizes three important points at this moment.

He is very lucky to have never lived through her situation, watching a loved one dying. This must be another kind of hell on earth that he does not wish upon his greatest enemy. Seeing how his girlfriend, who is the strongest person he knows, struggles to the point of a mental breakdown, shows Max that he would not be able to live through these circumstances the way she does.

(Y/N) is under too much pressure, trying to be a good family member, a helpful co worker and an attentive girlfriend. He feels like he failed her by elevating more of that pressure, making her take some time off from work and reassure (Y/N) that he can support them financially as long as she wants him to, so she can spend more time with her family.

He voices his third conclusion out loud. “Several emotions and feelings can be true at once. You can be thankful for the time you got left and still feel bad about their current condition. You’re allowed not wanting to see them to protect yourself. Sometimes, being selfish sounds like the worst thing you could do to outsiders, but the best decision for yourself. It’s up to you entirely. Don’t feel bad for your anticipatory grief, it is normal. Your brain wants to prepare itself for the end.

And no matter what you will do or where you are going, I’m always at your side and support all your decisions. In this house we support (Y/N)’s rights and wrongs.”

Her laugh makes Max’s heart lighter. He knows the upcoming weeks and months will not be easier than the previous ones. But he is aware that they will get through it together.

“Will you read to me?” (Y/N) looks at him with her puppy dog eyes, something they both know he can’t resist. “Ok”, he says after letting out a sigh, ”Get your Faye smut book. But only because you had a hard day. Next time, you will read to me ‘how to build a car’.”

Before Max even ends his sentence, (Y/N) launches herself from the couch and runs to get her book from her bedside table.

After an evening like this, none of them wants to have it any other way.

[stffed]

morning person - laios touden x gn reader

a/n: part two to this post. i am starved by his lack of content so i must sustain myself

the sun's rays hit laios' face, causing him to blink his eyes open. he was still tired, having barely slept that night. his dreams were filled with falin screaming and crying for him to help her - to save her. if it weren't for the fact that in between those dreams of screams and anguish that his mind was filled with a blank void - of him, floating in nothingness - then wouldn't have called what he experienced that night sleep at all.

he rubbed at his eyes and looked over to the other side of the bed. you were sound asleep, mouth open and drool spilling past your lips. your head was propped against one of your arms while the other was draped across laios' body. it was quite adorable. if he could, laios would have it immortalised forever in a portrait and carry it around with him.

laios leaned over and pressed a kiss to your forehead. he gently shook your body in an attempt to wake you up. "it's time to wake up, y/n."

your hand flew from his body to you face. groaning, you rolled over. "five more minutes. i'll be up in five minutes."

he shook his head. honestly, he should have known better. despite you being the one to dictate that chilchuck, marcille, you and himself would leave for the dungeon at first light, you were yet to wake up. the dungeon had skewered his sense of time as they could spend nights under a blazing sun and days under a starlight sky but you were used to the surface (and waking up on your own time).

you seriously weren't a morning person.

a knock at the door made laio turn his sleepy head.

"are you two ready? me and marcille are ready to go when you are," came chilchuck's voice. if he strained, laios could hear the clunk of bags moving about.

"we've just woken up. give us," he yawned, "ten minutes and we'll meet you in the kitchen."

there was some rattling (presumably marcille holding back chilchuck from breaking down the door) before it faded off down the corridor. laios looked back to you and smiled.

you seemed so peaceful. with drool spilling from your mouth and tufts of hair unbrushed, he couldn't see anything other than beauty.

was this the life outside of the dungeon that he was missing? going to bed with you, waking up with you, just spending the day with you? he could count on one hand how many times he had seen you this past month. laios had missed the last time he was in the dungeon, he always missed you whenever the two of you had to be apart. he had made it a habit of returning to you as soon as possible the minute they would leave the dungeon. maybe that was why your house was his first point of call after being they returned to the surface.

laios loved being in the dungeon. all the monsters he could see and the new environments to explore. but he also loved you. and it broke his heart a bit every time he had to leave you to go back. well, he didn't have to go back underground but he chose to. did you ever hate him for that? for leaving you behind every time? for choosing the dungeon over your relationship?

you sat up, rubbing at your eyes. "morning." you grumbled, words muffled by a yawn.

laios brought his hands to your face and gave you a kiss. you were far too sleepy to reciprocate but you did your best. when he pulled away, he squished your cheeks together gently.

even through your sleep-addled eyes you could see the wheels turning in his head. what was he doing, thinking so early? this was the time to sleep not the time to think.

"come on," said laios. he removed his hands from your face and got out of bed. "Let's go save falin."

the next time that you all walked out of that dungeon, with falin in tow, would be his last. he was already thinking about the next time he would be able to wake up next to you. and the time after that. and after that.

[luciferlightbringer]

Love in a Hopeless Place

Chapter 3

You guys!!! Thank you so much for all of the love so far! I makes me so happy to see people liking the story so far. Here is Chapter 3! xoxo, Dany <3

Chapter 2|Chapter 3|Chapter 4|Updated through Chapter 12

Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader Word Count: 2.6k CW: Prostitution, Slowburn, mentions of panic, anxiety, depression, hurt/comfort, bullying, slight manipulation

The next morning, light started to drift through the curtains of Lucifer's room again, like they did every morning. But something about this morning felt... different.

Lucifer felt himself return to the waking world, and his eyes fluttered open and he felt... actually kind of awake, for once? Lucifer sat up with a bit of confusion, partly from how he felt and partly due to realizing he was still in his mostly unbuttoned shirt and trousers from the previous day. Looking around, he tried to remember what all had happened the night before.

Seeing his bowtie on the floor, hat on a random table, and his jacket hug up on the mirror, he remembered that something different had happened the night before, but it was fuzzy. Eventually his eyes caught sight of a small note card that was left on his bedside table. He picked it up and read it.

'Thank you for inviting me to share the evening with you, for all it's ups and downs. It was an honor. You are welcome to call on me again if you are ever in need of company of any sort. Best Wishes, (y/n)'

Upon reading your name, Lucifer started to remember scenes of interaction from the night before. His first view of you near the door, kissing your hand, walking you into his room, you on top of him in your lace lingerie, you beside his bed with eyes full of concern, you holding out your arms as he ran into your hug, and the comforting darkness of your embrace as tears ran down his face while he slipped into slumber.

'Oh my god... Did I just cry myself to sleep in her arms? I hired a prostitute and all I did was fall asleep in her arms? Crying?! How pathetic am I?' he thought to himself. He looked back down at your beautiful handwriting, the way the letters curved and twisted, a small heart over the i in "Wishes", and thought about how gentle your eyes had looked when he was in so much pain. Such warm and comforting eyes. How his mood had shifted, and on a dime, it seemed that so did yours when you could tell something was wrong. Was that real concern? Or were you just acting? Honestly, if it felt that good... did he really care which one it was?

For once, he felt like he had actually slept, that he was more alert, not perfect, but something had improved after the last night. That did not feel like a coincidence. Something about being with you last night make him feel better, and he wanted more. He wasn't sure about sexual intimacy at this point, since something about that had seemed to set him off, but the comfort was nice. Would she be willing to come over again just to comfort and hold him like that?

He read the note again, 'You are welcome to call on me again if you are ever in need of company of any sort.' Company of any sort. Any sort. Anyyyy sortttt... But what did she mean by that?! Did she mean like, 'I'm here for you no matter what! We can hang out, we can talk, you can cry, we can fuck, just whatever! I'm your gal!' or did she mean like 'I'm down for whatever, hot stuff~, wink wink, nudge nudge, *insert lude hand gestures here*'

Lucifer would spend much of the next hour thinking way to hard about that one line of text you had written, mumbling to himself as he took a shower, brushed his teeth, combed his hair, got dressed, and once he got a look at himself in the mirror.

"Mayyyybbeeee... I'm thinking way to hard about this and she is just, I don't know, wanting to give me whatever support I need. What do you think about that!" he said to his mirror-self dramatically. He stared at his reflection for a minute before deciding to agree with himself on his last statement.

"That's what I thought" he said smiling and nodding to the mirror version of himself. "Now onto the next question... how long do I wait before requesting her again without looking like a total fucking creepy loser."

That question... would consume him for the majority of the afternoon, only to be quickly interrupted by the realization that he never paid you for the night before, which briefly gave him something else to panic about.

______________________________________________________________

You on the other hand, woke up and started the day the same as you always had, in your tiny room that you had been renting over the brothel. Most of the other girls from the Lounge also lived there, it wasn't required but it was easier in some ways, mostly for the nights that you had so many clients throughout the day that your body hurt and you could barely move.

It was not so great most of the time, it was loud and cramped, smelled of drugs and cigarettes, you could often hear the sounds of sex from the Lounge below, and some of the girls would try to steal shit. To minimize that, you just tried not to have a lot in your apartment other than a bed, a couch, a small table with a tv, and one of the best safes in hell that you could get your hands on the would fit in your small space for your money. It wasn't much, but it worked.

As you got up and started on your morning routine, your thoughts drifted back to Lucifer from the previous night, and wondered how he was doing. You weren't used to thinking about clients after you were off the clock with them, but you also weren't used to watching them have a panic attack and then cry themself to sleep in your arms. Or you know, being the most powerful being in all of hell for that matter either.

Something about that felt, soft, and nice. It made you feel like you did something possibly worthwhile for once. Who knows if it made an impact on him, or if he would even remember or care about you once he woke up, but something in you prayed that it did. How odd it was to think about that you had not just comforted a normal demon, but the King of Hell, a former high ranking angel, someone who had probably seen God or the highest orders of Heaven. It almost felt like it shouldn't be possible for angels to cry, surely they were not meant to know such pain? And yet, here was one, full of pain and torment probably beyond your understanding. It made you sick just thinking about it.

But that was not for you to concern yourself with, who knows if you would ever see him again. Plus, you had today's clients to focus on. Another day, another dollar. 'Hey, hey, hey, fuck my life.'

You head downstairs to find Cynthhhhia waiting with a shit eating grin on her face once she sees you, giving you a sinister laugh. You roll your eyes.

"Tch. What's got you in such a good mood this morning?" you scoff.

"Larry's been looking for you. You're in trouble," she says with venom in her voice.

Your chest tightens. Oh shit. What could it be? Did you miss your day to clean the dressing rooms? Did Lucifer call and complain about something you did? Were you gonna get fired? You try not to show it on your face, but you do stop walking.

"Why do you say that?" you say, trying to hold an even tone.

Cynthhhhia laughs with a hiss, "Apparently, someone forgot to get a payment from a certain customer last night."

'Fuuuckkkkkk!'

God damn it. You were so focused on taking care of him through his panic attack, then he fell asleep, and you completely forgot to ask for your payment. It also didn't seem appropriate at the time. You could work with this though.

You just laughed and flipped your hair, Cynthhhhia's expression shifted to confusion.

"Ohhhh haha, well ya, I mean that happens sometimes when you just fuck someone so good that they pass out, right? I mean we have all been there," you say giving her a big grin. Cynthhhhia's face changes to her normally prissy annoyance.

"Oh! Have you never had that happen? Oh, well. You'll get there." you smugly walk past her as you pat her on the shoulder. Cythhhhia aggressively shrugs off your touch and hisses as you walk past her. "I'll just go find him now, thanks for the heads up girlypop. Kisses!"

Nailed it. You loved shutting that bitch up, but you always wish it didn't have to come to that. But she wasn't the only one who could play a mean girl, you were just smarter about it. Now to go find Larry and put on a good show for him too.

You put on a panicked look and start to run around the brothel, asking around for Larry. After a few minutes, you find him out in the lobby, chatting with some patrons. You make eye contact with him, give a relieved smile and run to him.

"Darling, there you are! I've been looking all over for you!" you exclaim with your biggest sweetest smile.

"Babydoll! Excuse me fellas, I'll be right back," the pig-man says as he moves past the group of men he was standing with to meet you half way across the room. "What's going on? I didn't see a payment from your customer last night, and that's not like you," he said with concern in his voice, but not like a genuine type of concern. It was the type of concern that you had come to know as 'You better be giving me a good reason as to why I didn't get my money.'

You pouted and tried to look flustered, "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry! I just had such a good time and we got so into such a rough and dirty night of kinky sex that, I accidently fucked him so hard that he passed out! I didn't know what to do, so I just came back home and hoped you would be able to help me figure it out. I'm really sorry for getting so carried away," you finish with a bat of your eyes.

Ugh, you hated your own fake, ditzy, whiny voice, but you knew Larry was a sucker for it, and it normally got you out of some uncomfortable situations. Larry's face morphed into a smile and he let out a boisterous laugh before giving you a pat on the shoulder.

"Aww that's my girl! You know what, he's a first timer. So I'll cut him some slack for today. If he doesn't get me a payment by tomorrow, I'll give him a call, give him a day to recover from the high. Hopefully I won't have to send the Sharks after him!" he gave you a nudge in the ribs and you laughed along with him.

You were thankful that he bought your story, but you hoped that this wasn't going to cause trouble for Lucifer. Larry was friends with some of the Loan Sharks, and sometimes he told stories about the aggressive lengths that they would go to in order to get their money back, or take out the people that didn't pay. But, it wasn't your fault that Lucifer had forgotten to pay. Plus, you did not anticipate how last night was going to go, and you don't normally ask for payments at the beginning of the first meeting, that felt tacky to you.

Luckily, your worries were extinguished a few hours later. After your first few clients of the day. Larry came to find you again with a big grin on his face.

"Well, looks like we didn't need to worry, Mr. 'Lance' night came through with payment and an apology for not remembering to pay last night," Larry boasted with a sharp grin.

You try to hold back your surprise, "Oh? Did he come in to drop it off?"

Larry waved a hand, "Naw, he sent some lackey of his, all snooty and fancy like 'I was sent on behalf of Lance to give you his payment for last night and an apology for not paying after the appointment last night due to being incapacitated. He promises that this will not be an issue with future appointments' blah blah blah" he laughed, dropping the mocking pompous tone he used to mock the "lackey".

You laughed along with him, but internally you were caught up on the last part about "future appointments", was that a paraphrase? Or did the messenger actually say that?

"Ah, so does it some like I've secured a new repeat customer?" you ask, trying not to sound too excited.

"Sounds like it! I asked if he had wanted to schedule for his next appointment, but his lackey didn't seem to know. Said he would probably be in touch at some point. Oh also, here is the tip he left for you," he smirked. Larry slid your tip into your hands and headed off to pester one of the other girls for something.

Your heart fluttered. Lucifer wanted to see you again, possibly, and that made you feel good. You normally didn't care what customers thought of you, but you thought it made sense that this was an exception. This was the King of Hell himself. Who knows how he will want to interact with you this next time around, but you figured you should be prepared for both possibilities of comforting and sexual intimacy. Not something you needed to figure out right at that moment.

You then looked down at the money in your hand, and your eyes went wide at the amount of money in your hands.

Wait, holy shit. What?!

The tipped amount that was in your hands was more than you had ever seen at one time. This was probably the same amount the you would usually get tipped in a week, let alone from one client.

You quickly tucked away the money under your arm and made your way up to your room to hide the money in your safe. You did not trust anyone except Larry knowing how much you would be making in tips from 'Lance' if this was going to be a regular thing. Especially, Cynthhhhia and her hoard of goons.

As you got to your room, closed the door, and started to count through the money, you smiled. He didn't need to tip you this much, you don't know why he did, but it made you feel good. You didn't feel fully comfortable seeing this as confirmation of any sort of building blocks of connection, but it didn't feel like it was a negative sign either.

You didn't hear anything else for a few days, but soon Larry notified you that 'Lance' had called again to meet with you, scheduled for a week after your first meeting at happened. Larry also relayed a message from 'Lance', requesting that he "really liked that thing you did at the end of the night, and would really like more of that if it was possible." You smiled and nodded.

Larry asked what it was you had done at the end of the night, you replied with only a finger up to your lips, a wink, and the statement, "A magician never reveals her secrets."

_____________________________________________________________

Thank you again to all my new and returning readers and followers! I'm so happy I get to share this story with you all <3 Let me know if you want added to the taglistTaglist: @froggybich @wonderlandangelsposts @glowinthedarkbones1150 @marydragneell @crescent-z @superdinosaurnacho

[kiarastromboli]

Teach me 3 (Chris Sturniolo x y/n)

Part. 1. Part.2

Masterlist.

Warning: angst, argument ?

Summary: After being summoned by her principal for what she did with Chris, Y/N sees things take a completely different turn. Unintentionally, Chris will not make it any easier for her, pushing her to make a choice that is more than painful for their mutual well-being.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

A week had passed since the incident in the locker room with Chris.

After being summoned, the principal decided to suspend both Chris and me from school for two weeks.

If only that was the end of it…

After the meeting, my parents demanded a serious discussion at home.

“Y/n, I’m trying to keep my calm, but what the hell is this story?”

“This is not how we raised you. What kind of girl sleeps with a guy in her high school locker room?”

“Your behavior is disappointing, Y/n. I expected better from you.”

“For how long did you hide this little adventure with that asshole from us?”

“Do you realize how irresponsible you’ve been? Do you think universities will appreciate seeing this on your school record?”

“Believe me, you won’t see that boy again, Y/n. I’ll make sure you never see him again.”

It was mainly my father speaking, as usual. My mother just cried, casting disdainful glances at me, as if I had ruined our lives with my actions.

As always, it wasn’t about me, but about them. I was their daughter, but I wasn’t really myself. All my life, I had been just their daughter, nothing more. The one time I allowed myself to be me, I ended up making an unforgivable mistake in their eyes.

I was not allowed to go out, and I hadn’t seen my phone since then, so no way to communicate with Chris about what happened.

I felt so guilty for leaving him in the dark like this. Chris knew my parents were strict, but I had never dared to tell him how much.

I wasn’t even allowed to break up with my boyfriend as I wanted; my father took care of sending him a message, making it clear that if he dared to approach me, he’d be in trouble.

It was the first time in my life that I was punished, and the first time I saw my parents so disappointed in me. To be honest, I was disappointed in myself. What had possessed me to do that? What did I hope to achieve?

I hoped to one day be more than just their daughter, seriously, Y/n?

My days consisted of crying, staring at my bedroom ceiling, and rereading the same books over and over. Maybe that’s all I deserved after what I did.

And maybe it was better for Chris too. He and I could never have worked; we could never have hidden this relationship indefinitely, and my parents would never have accepted me being with him.

He loved a girl who didn’t even have the right to exist, and how selfish I was to trust that “we” could ever exist one day.

I had to let him go, even if it broke my heart. I knew that by staying with him, I condemned us to a catastrophic end, and it eventually happened.

It was now 2 a.m., and I was lying in my bed doing nothing. Sleep had abandoned me a long time ago.

Every night when the lights went out, the only thing I could think about was how much I had disappointed my parents, and it haunted me.

*knock knock knock*

I panicked and sat up in bed when I heard the familiar sound at my window.

*knock knock knock*

I knew it was him, but what was I supposed to do?

*knock knock knock*

Oh my God, if he keeps this up, he’ll wake up my parents. I have no choice.

I got up to open the window for him, and he immediately entered, almost pushing me without waiting for my approval.

“Chris, what the hell?!” I said, surprised, as he stumbled towards my desk.

He looked in bad shape, with huge dark circles, disheveled hair, red eyes, and the smell of alcohol.

“My beautiful baby,” he said, placing his hand on my cheek and smiling.

“Chris, have you been drinking?” I asked, concerned, before going to lock my door.

“I missed you so much, Y/n,” he said, sitting on my bed.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” I sighed.

“Why didn’t you answer any of my messages, baby? What did i do wrong?” he said, looking up at me.

“Chris, you have to leave. You can’t stay here,” I told him, sighing.

“I’m not going anywhere until you answer me,” he said, crossing his arms.

“Oh God, please, I’m serious. If my parents find you here, they’ll kill me. It’s not a joke!” I told him, getting annoyed.

“Y/n, I don’t care about your parents. This is about us!” he said, standing up.

“But what ‘us’ are you talking about, Chris? There’s no ‘us’ anymore!” I replied, feeling tears welling up.

"Y/n, you can't do this to me; I just went through the toughest week of my life without you," he said, breaking down.

"Y/n, look at me, look at the state I end up in without you; I need you," he said, hitting his chest.

I was simply helpless before his speech; it killed me to see him so distressed, and it broke my heart not to be able to do more to help him.

"Look at how pathetic I am without you," he said, grabbing my hand.

"Chris, you have to leave now," I said, feeling a tear roll down my cheek.

"You can't give me the best moments of my life and take everything away like this overnight without giving me an explanation, Y/n. I'm sorry for what happened in the locker room; let me make it up to you," he said, getting upset.

I didn't know what to say; honestly, I wanted to tell him how much I missed him, but I had to let him go. The state he had just put himself in because of me was proof enough that this relationship was not good for him, and that's not what I wanted for him.

"Y/n, we'll find a solution, but you have to explain me the problem if you want us to get through this. I know you're not telling me everything, baby, talk to me," he said, locking his eyes with mine and placing his hands on my cheeks.

And I cracked. I cracked when I saw hope in his eyes, when I saw how much he wanted it to work. It was what I wanted too, but it led to nothing.

It would have been selfish of me to tell him how much I loved him, how much I wanted us to find a solution because I knew I had condemned myself. I knew that by giving him the slightest hope, I risked breaking him even more than I already had.

"Don't make things more complicated, please. I can't do this, Chris, go away," I said, crying.

"Baby, tell me what's wrong," he said in a trembling voice.

"My parents don't want me to see you anymore," I confessed, hoping he would understand, but I knew he wouldn't give up that easily.

"And is that the only problem? Y/n, if that's all, we can continue to see each other secretly. I swear I don't mind; they won't know anything! If that's what we have to do to stay together, then I'm ready to do it, ready for anything. But please, Y/n, don't end everything like this, I beg you," he said desperately.

"No, you don't understand. It will never work. What kind of couple hides their relationship from the world, Chris? You deserve better than that," I told him, shaking my head and stepping back.

"But it's you I want, Y/n. I climbed to your window, and it's with you that I want to spend the rest of my days," he said, advancing toward me.

His words were like shards of glass stabbing into my heart. As long as they remained, I knew the blood wouldn't flow, but I also knew I had to tear them out to heal.

"No, you're just drunk, and you don't mean any of what you're saying," I said, shaking my head and trying to hold back the tears.

"I'll tell you all this again tomorrow when I'm sober, and I'll tell you every day of my life if I have to. But, Y/n, please, I need you; I can't do it without you," he said, a tear running down his cheek.

I stood there, staring at him, crying, and he took me in his arms.

And I felt those same shards pierce my heart again because of the comfort I could find in his arms. I wished to die there, die in his arms.

"I'll fix everything, Y/n, I promise. Let me fix everything for you," he said, stroking my head, and my heart was never heavier than at that moment.

I cried so much I had trouble breathing; I couldn't stop. I was in his arms, and I knew it was probably the last time.

"Y/n, I love you; don't let me down," he said in a weak voice, and I left his arms.

I looked at him with tear-filled eyes; I wanted to scream that I loved him too, but I couldn't. So I closed my eyes and screamed it in my head without letting the sound escape my mouth.

He looked at me confused, and I bit my lip to stop my sobs.

"Y/n, please," he said, sighing.

I shook my head, and he started to move towards me, but before he reached me, I told him everything.

I had to tell him the truth if I wanted him to understand, even though I knew it meant stabbing him in the heart.

"My parents are sending me to another school, Chris," I said in one go.

"What?" he said, confused, stopping.

"They don't trust me anymore. They're sending me to a private school on the other side of the country," I told him, trying not to cry.

He took a step back, completely disoriented when he heard that.

He sat down on my bed and ran his hand over his face, letting out a few sobs that broke my heart.

He had just realized the situation; he had just realized it was hopeless.

I stood there, watching him realize what I had just told him, and it was horrible, but at least now he knew it was over for good.

"It's okay," he said, wiping his tears and getting up. "We'll find a solution, Y/n. I'll come to see you."

"No, Chris," I said, crying.

"Yes, I'll fix it. I'll sort this out," he said, pacing back and forth.

"Chris please..." I sighed.

"I'll just set aside some money to come and see you," he continued, completely in denial.

"Chris-" I said, with a weak voice, still crying.

He lifted his head towards me and immediately came to wipe away my tears. "Don't cry, baby, it's okay, it's not a big deal."

"You have to let me go," I replied in a voice so weak that I almost doubted he heard it.

"No, Y/N, we just got together, stop saying such things," he said with a fake laugh, trying to conceal his sobs before placing his hand on my cheek.

"Chris, you have to let me go," I said, placing my hand on his cheek with a reassuring smile to show him that it would be okay.

"No," he said, letting a few tears fall. "Y/N, I'll handle this, I promise. I'll do it for us," he continued, wiping his tears and placing his other hand on my cheek. "I'll fix it."

"There's no 'us' anymore, Chris; it's over," I said.

"So what, you're going to give up at the first problem?" he said, raising his voice.

"You're just going to throw everything away just because your parents don't want you with me?" he said, getting upset.

"Y/n, fight for us, for me... for yourself," he said, desperate.

I wanted to answer him, but I had nothing left to say; it was too hard. It hurt too much to see him break his heart over me like this.

"I'm ready to fight for you, and you're giving up just to please your parents, seriously, Y/n, damn it," he said, cracking.

He placed his hands back on my cheeks, "You're not going to let your parents separate us, baby, I-," he started before I cut him off.

It was too much for me; I couldn't continue to stand there listening to him beg me to fight for him when I couldn't.

"It's over, please go now," I said, removing his hands from my face.

"You don't mean it, Y/n; you can't even say it properly. You don't want it to end; I told you we'd find a solution," he said, getting frustrated.

I closed my eyes before taking a deep breath; I felt like I was suffocating.

"Y/n, if you want me to leave, look me in the eyes and tell me clearly," he said, clenching his jaw.

I opened my eyes and tried with all my might to hold back my tears.

I tried to contain all my pain; it was so unfair. Why didn't he just let me go? Why did he have to ask me to fight? Why did he keep pushing me to keep hope?

I didn't want to do it, but I had no choice; I had to tear the bandage off at once if I wanted Chris to be happy one day without me.

"Chris, it's over; I want us to separate i don’t love you anymore. This relationship is doomed to fail; go, please," I said in a harsh tone without looking away from him.

And I could almost hear his heart shatter in his chest.

I was dying to tell him that I didn't mean a word of it, but I didn't have the right to condemn him in this relationship.

He turned around and started walking towards my window, and before leaving, he looked at me one last time, his eyes shining with tears.

He was waiting for me to stop him, to grab him by the shirt and kiss him like the first night he climbed through that window.

He was waiting for me to crack like all the other times and tell him everything would be okay.

But this time, it wasn't the case, and when he realized that, he went through my window and left.

I collapsed on the floor; I had just put an end to the most beautiful thing that had ever happened to me.

I had just broken my heart and the heart of the man I love the most.

All this would never have happened if I hadn't kissed him that night.

If I hadn't let him into my room and into my heart.

I was convinced that love stories like ours never died like in books; I thought things would eventually work out, and a solution would come to us unexpectedly.

But life is a heartless bitch ready to rip your heart out when you least expect it.

The next week, I found myself packing my bags to leave Boston for good. Chris never climbed back through my window, and I deleted his number from my phone, hoping he would eventually find someone with whom he would have a happy ending.

We were just an anomaly in the system of lines that were supposed to remain parallel but ours ended up crashing into each other.

We consumed each other without knowing that this story had an expiration date, and I pay the price every day waking up far from him.

I pay the price every time I see something that reminds me of him.

A lacrosse jersey, a half-open window, a soda can—absolutely everything brought me back to him.

And I continued to search for a piece of him in every new person I met.

Even though I lost him, my love for him will never fade. Every day, I pray for my day to end quickly so I can find him every night in my dreams.

To the boy who made me realize how good love could feel.

And how painful it could be too.

Masterlist.

[tomssexdoll]

When I was your man

PAIRINGS: Tom 2009 x Female reader CONTENT: ANGST + FLUFF + SMUT SYPNOSIS: Tom and Y/N broke up, after 2 years of dating she finally had enough of his shitty behaviour. Tom starts to see her everywhere and deeply regrets his actions, crying for you every night. One night he sees you at a bar, dancing with another man and he approaches you. A/N: inspired by when I was your man by bruno mars WARNINGS: dom! tom, sub!reader, eating out, alcohol mentions, fingering

Me and Y/N broke up a month ago, she couldn't deal with my shitty behaviour she said, complaining about how I treat her. When I refused to apologise she took her things and left, texting me later that we were over.

As soon as I saw her say that I burst into tears, realizing my shitty actions towards her.

I went to bed that night but it didn't feel right. It was the same bed but it felt just a little bit bigger, more empty without her, cold and lonely.

I hear our song on the radio but it doesn't sound the same. The song we had our first kiss to, lost our virginities to, countless of memories wasted all because of me.

When my friends talk about her all it does is just tear me down, cause my heart breaks a little when I hear her name.

I've been super depressed after the breakup, not being able to sleep properly and not eating. All I wanted was her, to hold her, caress her soft skin, kiss and appreciate her. But she was gone, and I didn't know how long it'd be until I could have her in my arms again.

My pride, my ego, my needs and my selfish ways, caused a good strong woman like her to walk out of my life, and it haunts me everytime I close my eyes.

I couldn't just set my selfishness down for a second, I was a fucking idiot, treating the kindest and most beautiful girl like shit, disregarding her feelings, gaslighting her and neglecting her. I looked at twitter, seeing headlines of her with another guy.

I sobbed and sobbed, crying my eyes out, seeing her already moved on. I knew I deserved it but I wanted her back so badly, she was my everything, my baby, my world. I wish I could turn back time and just start all over again, make her feel like the only girl in the world, make her feel special and loved.

One day I decided to go to a bar and drink my sorrows away, running out of all the alcohol in my house that I drowned myself in. I sat down, ordering a couple shots of whiskey, downing them within seconds.

I turned around to see everyone dancing, sweaty bodies pressed up against each other, making me remember the special moments we shared in this bar, tears welled up in my eyes again.

Then suddenly I saw her, Y/N was there, she was so beautiful, so stunning. Her features glowing from the flashing lights, curves showing off in her sexy dress. My baby was dancing like she loved to do, but she was dancing with another man, he smiled at her, holding her close and kissing her gently.

My eyes widened and I stared there in shock, it felt like the world stopped, like everything went silent. She swayed her hips, grinding into him. She looked like she was having so much fun.

I stepped closer, the lights now hitting me. She turned and looked at me, her eyes widening and her movements haltering. We just stared at each other for a while, she eventually rolled her eyes and excused herself, walking off. I ran after her, calling out for her.

Eventually I grabbed onto her arm, looking down at her "baby..please" I choked out a sob, she pushed me off "get off me Tom, I told you we're over.." she mumbled, not being able to look me in the eyes.

I noticed how she quickly wiped a tear from her cheek, I grabbed her chin and lifted it to look at me, "I know im probably much too late, to try and apologise for my mistakes" I sighed "but i just want you to know, I hope he buys you flowers and holds your hand, gives you all his hours, take you to every party cause i remember how much you loved to dance, do all the things i've should've done..when i was your man.."

Tears welled up in her eyes, she hugged me tightly and sobbed into my chest, "oh tom..I missed you so much" I smiled and stroked her hair. "Let's go outside baby..talk about things better, hm?" I mumbled against her hair, she nodded and took my hand, leading my outside and leaving the guy she was with.

We walked to my car and got in, blasting the heating. "He's not with me or anything..i've been hooking up with him for like 2 weeks and I figured paparazzi might have been there to take photos and make you jealous.." she crossed her arms, frowning.

"I deserve it though, I treated you badly baby, you didn't deserve to go through what you did" I held her hand, rubbing my thumb over the skin softly, "maybe you can give me another chance? I swear I'll change baby, it won't be like the other times, I need to prove to you that I can change, I can be a better man for you" I started to cry again, she winced and got onto my lap, wiping my tears away and kissing me softly.

"I'm an idiot for forgiving you again..but fuck you seem so sincere.." she sighed, smiling softly. "I'll do anything for you baby, name it and i'll do it, I just can't lose you" I said, my voice shaky, rough with emotion.

"I haven't been able to function without you, you complete my world" I caressed her cheek. "Let's go home, I'm tired of living out of a shitty hotel" she giggled, climbing into the passanger seat again.

As we got home she rushed in, running onto our shared bed, "fuck..how I missed this bed" she rolled around in it, I smiled and walked in, laying next to her.

"Tom..?" she turned to me, "yes schatz?" I pulled her closer, looking down at her. "Why did you treat me so badly?" her question hit hard, I didn't really know myself. "Uh..I don't know..I was just stupid and I didn't appreciate the wonderful woman I had in front of me, I was a little intimidated, you were way too good for me and I just thought sabotaging everything would make it better, which now I see was fucking stupid" I groaned, rubbing my temples in frustration.

"I'm just glad you eventually saw how it affected me, I missed you a lot I will admit but I was also hurt and I still am" I nodded, "I know baby..and I'm so sorry, I wish I could take back all the pain" I said, reaching out and grabbing her hips, rubbing them softly.

"You know I'd do anything for you, I would take a bullet straight through my brain just to prove my love to you." She chuckled "baby..chill out" I smirked "sorry..I just want you to know how much I love and appreciate you"

She climbed on top of me, tracing my features with her delicate fingers. "There will be no sunlight if I lose you baby, just like the clouds my eyes will do the same, if you walk away everyday it'll rain" I kissed her softly, she smiled "Tom that's beautiful.." she whispered and kissed me back.

I flipped us over, me hovering over her. "Let me give you the love you deserve, make you feel beautiful.." she nodded and slowly unbuttoned her shirt, revealing black lacey bra.

My head dove into her chest, kissing and sucking softly.

She moaned softly, delicate sounds coming out of her beautiful lips. I reached down and removed her skirt. Her beautiful figure underneath me.

My fingers traced her curves softly, appreciating her beauty. "So, so beautiful..my angel" I whispered, kissing down her stomach and planting a soft kiss on her panties, her hips bucking up slightly.

"Tom..don't tease" she whined, I chuckled and slid her panties off, bending her legs and prying her thighs apart, licking a stripe on her folds, collecting her juices.

I slowly lapped my tongue onto her her clit, sucking softly, "mm!" she moaned loudly, gripping onto the sheets tightly. I smirked, happy to see her so pleasured.

I sneaked my hand up, entering 2 digits into her wetness, stretching her out. "Oh fuck!" she groaned as my fingers curled at her g spot, "is it good baby?" I teased, she nodded and screwed her eyes shut, focusing on the pleasure.

My fingers found their rhythm inside her, thrusting in and out. I could feel her release slowly approaching, her breath coming in short gasps. I increased the pressure on her clit, sucking harder as I felt her about to climax.

I could tell I was driving her wild, her head lolled back and her eyes were tightly shut, legs slightly trembling. "Cum for me baby.." I moaned on her clit, slobbering all over it.

I felt her pussy clench against my fingers as she came hard, a loud high pitched moan leaving her mouth. "So good.." I chuckled, licking up all her juices and climbing up to hover over her again.

I grabbed my clothed erection, "do you want it baby?" she nodded quickly, grabbing at my pants and shoving them off. I grinned at her urgency, pulling my cock out of my boxers and pumping it a few times.

"Can't wait to be inside you again.." I groaned, pressing my tip at her entrance, slowly pushing in. It had been a while since we last fucked, her "hookups" obviously not as big as me.

She cried out, holding onto me tightly, "fuck!", I dragged my hand down to her clit, rubbing slow circles to let her relax. I felt her pussy unclench on my cock, finally being able to thrust in better.

I slowly thrusted, gradually picking up my pace so I didn't hurt her.

Eventually my cock was pounding into her, my grip tight on her hips, holding her into place. "Fuck..so tight" I groaned, my head rolling back.

"Mmm! Fuck!" she moaned, feeling my tip hit her g spot, I leaned down and started to suck her nipples softly, earning a loud groan from her. My tongue swirled against her sensitive buds, making her throw her head back.

"Cum for me pretty girl.." I grunted, picking up my pace again and slamming into her, the tension building in my stomach as I felt my release approach, nails digging into her hips.

"Mmh! Oh shit!" she cried out, wrapping her arms around me and holding me close, her pussy clenching around my cock, increasing the amount of pleasure I was recieving.

I felt her body shudder under me, her orgasm washing over her and her juices painting my cock, I groaned and came inside her, shooting my load deep into her and making sure to keep thrusting so it could stay in.

I sighed and collapsed on top of her, cock still buried deep inside her hole. "I missed you so much baby..I swear i'll never ever hurt you again, I was so stupid to treat you that way" I winced "please forgive me and take me back.." she frowned at my pain, kissing me softly.

"I know you're sorry baby, it'll take a while for me to trust you again but we can try one more time, don't blow it" she sighed, I sighed in relief, peppering kisses all over her face and flipping us over so that she was on top of my chest, "get some rest baby" I whispered into her hair.

tags: @itsmealaiah @tomkaulitzloverr @tomscumdump @tomscumdoll @bkaulitzlover @ballhair @estxkios @ge-billsgf @charliesgoodboy

[loveemii]

hiii!! can you please do husband!tanjiro x wife!reader , with tanjiro going out on a mission for a while and reader starts to grow worried that something has happened to him; he comes back exhausted, needing and missing his wifes touch so she.. (and you complete the rest)

you dont have to use she/her pronouns, its just that im a girl myself

thanks!!!! <3333

hello!! yes ofc i can, thank you sm for putting in this request! <333

- hope you enjoy ^_^ x

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It’s been almost a week since I saw Tanjiro leave for his mission, I hope he is ok and comes home already; anything could happen. Every time he leaves for a mission I think of the worst, most times he comes home within 2-3 days. But never this long..

Around 11 o clock pm there was a knock at our door, I look through the peep hole in hopes it’ll be my husband coming home from his mission. It was, “Thank goodness.” I sighed in relief he came home to me once more.

Without saying a word my husband Tanjiro ran into my arms crying, I clung onto him as well not letting go as I gently rubbed his back with one arm in hopes it’ll give him some sort of comfort. “I missed you so much!” He cried out, “I missed you more.” I replied, he pulls away to look into my eyes, he pressed his lips against mine and our tongues danced with one another after so long of not being touched.

Pulling away we smiled and I closed the door behind him as he made his way inside our home, “I made dinner earlier, I’ll warm some up for you.” My hand leading his to the kitchen as he took a seat. I warmed the food over the stove and served two bowls.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you ever since I left the house you know. Coming home to you brings me so much joy, knowing that you love me. I couldn’t ask for anything better.” Tanjiro suddenly spoke, I haven’t heard him say anything this sincere in a while, it was very nice to hear.

“Having you come home to me is what makes me strive to be better each day.” His smile lit up brighter which made mine as well. We finished our meal and decided to go to sleep since it was already so late. 

As I change into clothes to sleep in, I can feel Tanjiro’s eyes on me like a demons in the night. I notice him move from the corner of my eye; he was on the other side of the bed until he grabbed my waist while i was still changing. I had only had my undergarments on.

“Tanjiro, what are you doing?” I asked in a semi-teasing tone. My face was getting hot as he turned me to face him, “You’re so beautiful.” Tanjiro complimented before pressing his lips against mine.

We pulled away, “Sleep how you are, please?” Just hearing him say something like that was enough to make me squeeze my legs together, I didn’t. We laid in bed pulling the covers over, he pulled me into a cuddle and rested his head over my breasts as he closed his eyes to fall asleep which didn’t take long.

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i hoped you enjoyed how i created this anon! ^_^ thank you again for the cute request <3

- please excuse any errors