#help girl i think my boss and his boss r getting their freaky on what to do

[brainrotisseriechicken]

"stop doing that" "doing what?"

(hes being annoying on purpose)

[just-some-random-blogger]

I'll Protect Your Heart

Dream of the Endless x Reader

Summary: You get injured after trying to protect your husband and you get into a heated argument because of it

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: Fem!reader, wife!reader, heated arguement, sad and concerned!dream, fluff, typos, etc.

R E Q U E S T @northmansvamp: can you make it that I have powers and I over use them that’s what causes me to pass out but he catches me and carry’s me bridal style to his bed (telekinesis) + protecting him from things that want to hurt him + and we are husband and wife

A/N: do you like true blood by any chance, cause i am also an eric girl HAHAHA. i hope you like this my love <3 Tagging: @pinksirensong @deniixlovezelda @shadow-pancake9

It all happened pretty fast. It happened so fast, in fact, that I don't remember anything that happened at all. All I know I was with Dream and some freaky stuff started happening. So the fact I was now lying in bed with a towel on my forehead was pretty weird.

"Oh, geez," a voice croaks, "thank heavens your awake," Matthew swoops down on the bed, "Dream is like 1 molecule away from snapping."

I knit my brows as I raise my hand to pull the towel off my face, "what?"

Matthew walks forward, "well, yeah! I mean who wouldn't freak out after what you did."

I catch a blot of red on my damp towel as I drop it to my side. I shake my head and try to sit down, but then I feel pain spread throughout my body, "wait... what did I do again?"

Matthew does not respond. Neither do I repeat myself.

"Wait... are you serious, do you not remember?"

I bring my fingers to the side of my head and let out a soft sound when I feel pain in that area. I was probably grazed or something. I don't remember hitting my head anywhere though.

"I think, there was like..." I grunt as I push myself up, "... a fight."

"YEAH?!?" Matthew cried out, "no damn kidding," he words harshly. "There was a huge fight and you threw yourself in the middle of it against Dream's wishes .Then you-"

"Where is Dream?" I sigh.

"He went off to finish the-"

Matthew cuts himself off when I attempt to leave bed.

"No!" he protests, "no, no, no, no, no! The reason why I'm here is to literally prevent you from-"

"He needs my help, Matthew."

"Yeah, and look what your help did to you!"

I shoot him a dirty look as I make my way to the side of the bed.

"I don't care if you look at me like that! You overexerted yourself and I'm not going to let you out of this place!"

"Oh yeah," I mutter, struggling to get to my feet, "you think you're going to be able to stop me?"

"No, but he will," Matthew says in a gotcha moment.

I him in confusion and annoyance. I then look over to where he was staring and feel my skin break out in goosebumps at the sight of Dream's dark stare.

The next moment, he walks towards me and places his hands on my shoulders, "you are not to leave this room until I feel the strain in your body subside."

I narrow my eyes at the dark haired being, "so what? I'm a prisoner in my own home?"

"If that is how it makes you feel, so be it."

I scoff, "you literally would have been much more badly injured if-"

"So it seems your memory of the incident has cleared."

I suck in a breath, feeling anger rise up my body. I watch him as he pulls away and walks off to the window. I snip, "I remember how I helped you."

Dream is unfazed by the stern tone as he draws the curtains close, "then it would do you good to recall how I had to carry you here in my arms."

I let out frustrated breath and clench my jaw.

Dream turns to me, expressionless as he then waves off his raven, "you may go now, Matthew. Thank you for keeping an eye on the queen."

Matthew nods, "of course," he gives me a look, "see ya, bosses."

Once he flies off, Dream makes it to the bed and sits at the edge. I glare at him when he does so and wait for him to continue chastising me. He does not.

He leans onto his lap and tents is hands together. Dream draws in a deep breath before speaking, "it is no matter to me if I am hurt; my hurt is constant and does not fade."

I knit my brows at his words, not liking them one bit.

"Yet when I am with you, it's like I've never hurt at all."

My lips part and my defenses fall.

When Dream turns to me, his eyes are glassy and laced with worry, "how then would you expect me to exist if you had been lost to me? Knowing it was in my defense, my fault that lead to the macabre fate."

"Dream," I whimper, crawling over to him. The act caused me discomfort, but it was worth it when I got to lean on him and wrap my arms around his worried form.

"There would be nothing left for me if I am without you."

"Don't say that," I mutter, bringing my face to his shoulder, "there are a great many things in existen-"

"BUT I ONLY WANT YOU!" he snaps, growing rigid against me, causing me to pull back in surprise. As quickly as he had reacted, he turns, gets to his feet, and grabs my face. I feel tears prick in my eyes when I see just how distraught and sorrowful he looked.

"I only want you," he repeats carefully. His breathing grows heavy, "you must promise me that you will never do such a thing like that again."

"Dream."

He releases a breath and leans his forehead against mine, "you are not like me and my siblings. You are finite and breakable. You should not have put yourself in peril."

"My love," I whisper, "I understand you," I pull away from him, clasping his wrists as I take in his damp cheeks, "I am so sorry that that had you affected like this. I didn't intend to leave you so worried."

"Then promise me-"

"But you need to understand me as well," I mutter, "yes, I am not nearly as strong as you, I am finite and breakable, but my feelings for you are just as strong as what you feel."

Dream's brows furrow. He shakes his head.

"If I had a chance to redo everything, knowing I'd end up this way, I'd still do it all over again."

He mutters my name out like a plea.

"And you should not resent me for it, because I know you would do the same, if not more for me."

"But I am-"

"And I am your wife!" I quip before he could even finish. I tug him roughly until he is sat back down. I climb onto his lap and take my turn to catch his face, "one day..." I shake my head, "you and I both know I won't be here-"

"Please-"

"But I'm right here, Dream!" I blurt, grabbing his hands, placing them on my sides, "I'm right here for you to hold, and cry to, and love," I press a kiss on his forehead, "and if there's one thing I want you to remember about your queen, is that she believed even someone as big and tough as Dream of the Endless deserves to have someone protect him."

When he parts his mouth, I silence him with a kiss.

"And I will continue to protect you until my last breath, because that's what it means to love."

[magioftheseas]

Magical Miracle Dream Girl ☆ Momonomi

Summary: Matsuda suits up Monomi for her next attempt at the second boss in the events immediately following Chapter 13 of Super Danganronpa 2: Matsuda Yasuke's Battle of Despair and Wits .

Rating: PG (?)

Warnings: Laaaaanguage I guess? Idk.

Notes: Dude, reading this over with it being more reference heavy is lowkey super embarassing for me so I really don’t get how Kodaka does it so shamelessly. But I tried. Oh my god did I try. Anyway, I’m a sucker for ribbons and yet I did not squeeze in a single reference to the Ribon magazine so in reality I am a failure. In all seriousness, writing Matsuda and Monomi is great and I wuv wuv them both so much.

Read this fic among others HERE

Main story is HERE

Commission? Donate?

“U-Uuu...boohoo.”

Monomi sniffled into her paws, sitting on her rump and looking so pitiful it was honestly kind of sickening. Matsuda, ever weathering, just stared and waited for her to stop crying.

“I-I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I-I’ll get stronger, I will, I will, but, but,” her breath hitches. Matsuda wordlessly hands her a handkerchief and she blows into it. It’s an astounding sight and he refuses her trying to return it. He’s just, he’s not sure how his sanity would handle potentially having to wash off a stuffed animal’s mucus from a fabric. Shit was already so fucking weird.

Monomi dabs at her eyes delicately.

“Matsuda-kun, you really are such a kind boy. So, so kind.”

That’s such a miserable thing to say, so Matsuda rolled his eyes at it.

“O-Okay!” she exclaimed, getting to her feet with a few squeaky noises. “Sensei will now bulk up before her next fight! I won’t lose! Not when my precious students are depending on me!”

It’d be easy to burst her bubble but this time, she’s not wrong. We have to get to the hospital on the third island. Not just for that guy’s sake, but for all our sakes. I have to scan not just myself, but potentially everyone else.

“I-I just, um, need a new weapon, maybe a new ribbon, and, um.” Monomi pats her belly a few times. “This diaper is a bit restrictive too, huh.”

“Then just take it off?” He raised an eyebrow. “It’s not like you need it. You don’t defecate, right?”

“S-Such a horrifying question to ask your teacher!” she exclaimed, jumping with an utterly mortified look. “It’s not just inappropriate, it’s so indecent! You should never suggest nor ask such things of a young woman!”

Young woman? What about her is young besides that childish appearance? She has an age? She considers herself matured?

So many questions. So little importance. Matsuda scowled.

“I’ve already dug around your intestines,” he pointed out. “I know there’s nothing there but fluff.”

“D-Don’t say that; it’s so embarrassing!” she cried. “For a teacher to be in such a position before her precious, precious students! I’m just so, so ashamed! I never want to think about it again!”

“So you’re just going to keep wearing a diaper. Even though that’s not exactly tasteful either.” He shook his head. “What is there even to be done about you? Urgh. Come on.” He clapped his hands a few times, and she tottered after him in confusion. “Let’s go to Rocketpunch.”

Monomi blinked up at him. Grimacing, he explained.

“You said you needed a new ribbon, right? We’ll look for sticks on the way there but there might very well be something else you can use.”

“M-Matsuda-kun, oh.” She presses her paws together, awestruck. “Y-You really are such a kind, kind child!”

“Hurry the fuck up or I’m throwing you ahead.”

“R-Right!”

--

“Red or yellow? Is yellow maybe too flashy, Matsuda-kun?”

“Those are for pigtails.”

“Oh! I see! I’m not a pig, after all, I’m a rabbit! Ehehehe!” Monomi giggled even in the face of Matsuda’s stoic frown. “They have all kinds of ribbons. It’s difficult to choose.”

“Some of these have different names,” Matsuda said, pulling out a big red one. “This, for instance, is a V Ribbon.”

“Ooh! For victory!” Monomi exclaimed. “Yes, yes.”

“No, but whatever.” He held up the ribbon to Monomi’s ear. Making a face, he tied the bow and then leaned back to take in the sight. “A maybe, maybe?”

Not exactly feeling the most confident about this one. Best to find a couple of other options.

He dug around the ribbon section some more. His eyes light up as he pulled out another one, similarly bright red but so very fine.

“This one’s better,” he said, holding it out. “The Hime Ribbon. It’s an actual creation of the princess of the Magical Kingdom.”

“It looks like this one,” Monomi replied, patting her bow.

“It’s completely different!” Matsuda exclaimed, annoyed. “It’s come on, come on, go, go, jump!”

“Come on, come on, go, go jump?” Monomi repeated. She mulls it over before pumping her paw. “Ike, ike!”

“No, no!” Huffing, Matsuda rubbed his temples. “It's a classic! A fucking classic! Like, Akko-chan and Mami? No, not that Mami!”

“H-How cruel,” she sobbed, holding down her ears. “But, you know.” A pause before she beams. “It does give me a nostalgic feeling, Matsuda-kun.”

“Because it’s a classic,” Matsuda muttered, puffing his cheeks. “But, considering what this ribbon does, it’s a bad fit for you.”

“Eh? What does it do?”

“It’s...freaky.” Making a face, Matsuda set the ribbon lovingly aside. “Maybe we should look for something a little more straight-forward.”

“Hm, hm,” Monomi hums. “You know, transformation is a very important part of being a magical girl but it’s not always a good thing.” She tugs at her diaper, sullen. “This kind of transformation for instance.”

Transformation. Yeah, obviously. Normal people can only do so much even with the amount of capability they have. But, there’s more to it.

“It’s not about getting stronger, it’s also about building confidence in yourself,” Matsuda snapped, irritated now. “You may not have the range you did before but the fact that you’re so whiny and weepy about it is beyond infuriating. Was your character always that fickle? Your simpering, desperate optimism only a forced front?”

Monomi stilled and blinked up at him.

“Pathetic,” he sniffed. “Even if you didn’t mean for things to go so wrong, you’re making it worse with how flighty and pitiful you are.” He quiets for a moment, and weirdly, he feels sick. He covers his mouth with a groan. “Gross.”

“Matsuda-kun,” Monomi says, softly and meaningfully. “So harsh.”

It is a bit harsh, isn’t it? He thought almost in mirthless amusement. If she had just been trying to help, that’d be one thing, but she’s responsible for our lost memories. She’s part of the reason why we’re trapped in the first place. That’s why I can’t help but get so pissed about it.

That said, he should know better than to tell off a program of all things. He wished he could just spit in the face of whoever human in charge. But that person is, allegedly, someplace he can’t reach while trapped.

It’s useless. It’s all useless. Except. I really do have to get to the hospital.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. An adult complaining so much only burdens the children.”

Matsuda stilled for a moment, perking up.

“I’ll do better!” Monomi chirped. “I’ll get stronger! For my precious, precious students!”

She’s a program, but maybe she does have a semblance of maturity. He thinks that, but even so, his expression darkens. Still a program that acts as a proxy. Still incapable of explanations and justifications. Still the means we found ourselves trapped with our heads tampered. How trustworthy can someone so fundamentally detached and closed off really be? Even if it’s someone with this kind of personality?

Still, there was one matter that was clear while the rest were vague.

Even if we’re at odds, we have the same enemy. Komaeda said that about the traitor, too.

While he’s still undeniably pissed and suspicious, he does need all the help he can get. Especially from someone with the capabilities of taking down the Monobeasts, of opening the paths to the closed-off islands where more could be gleamed and where more could be done. With that, he looks through the ribbons once more, pulling out various options before he found one that had him pause.

A pretty yellow ribbon adorned with a blue star. Still quiet, Matsuda knelt down and tugged the red ribbon off Monomi to replace it. He fixed the yellow ribbon and the star shone brightly at him. Pulling back, he took in the beaming Monomi and nodded.

“Yeah, that’ll work. Let’s go with this one.”

Monomi twirled around with flourish.

“Magical Miracle Girl ☆ Monomi! At your service!” A pause. Monomi yelped. “N-No, Usami! I mean Usami! I’m not Monomi, I don’t even know a Monomi!”

“Right,” Matsuda said, nodding along. “There should be a baton around here that we can use as a weapon. Hopefully one that suits your new look.”

“Y-Yes!” she exclaimed, watery-eyed. “Yes, yes!”

When he found one and handed it over, Monomi waved it around and declared,

“I absolutely won’t lose! I’ll fight for the sake of my students! With the power of wuv and hope!”

Matsuda said nothing to that, even as his lips twisted in the slightest way.

Later, when Monomi faced against that snake beast again, not only was she knocked away again in spite of her best efforts, but...

That thing knocked her away with the force of a truck, causing the now broken baton to clatter at Matsuda’s feet.

“Welp,” was all he had to say.

[kyloxox]

Dreaming of You (Peter Parker x plus size reader)

Part 1 : https://fandomimagines131.tumblr.com/post/162033798757/thinking-of-you-peter-parker-x-plus-size-reader

Part 3: https://fandomimagines131.tumblr.com/post/162343874582/missing-you-peter-parker-x-plus-size-reader

Part 4: https://fandomimagines131.tumblr.com/post/162449075617/loving-you-peter-parker-x-plus-size-reader

Warnings: asshole boyfriend, some cursing.

Notes: Peter and the reader are juniors and Brian is a senior. I also might make a part 3.

Hope you enjoy:)

(Gif credit to owner)

You and Peter had become pretty good friends after your encounter with him the other month, much to Brian’s dismay. Sure he knew you wouldn’t want to go off with some dorky nerdy boy, right? But still he knew that Peter liked you and Brian would go out of his way to make Peter jealous, whether it was just simply kissing you or going up to you, while being in a middle of a conversation with Peter, and smacking your ass telling you that he can’t wait for tonight since his parents weren’t home, leaving you a blushing mess.

And it was true what Brian thought Peter did like you a lot. In the matter of a week he completely forgotten about Liz and all he could think about was you. He would think about what it would like to be your boyfriend, what it would be like to hold you. But then there was a big problem the fact that you had a boyfriend. Even if you did brake up with Brian, you wouldn’t go off and date a nerdy, no body like him, you probably would have a long line of popular guys wanting to date you. So Peter just kept his feelings to himself.

Then one day at gym class everyone was on the field, you were standing in a group with your friends, Brian standing a few feet away from you, and Peter and Ned standing a couple of feet away from Brian and his friends. Peter was just trying to mind his own business but he looked over at you in your short shorts. He heard a howl of laughter coming from Brian and his friends knowing they had caught him staring at you.

“Hey Parker how about you quit staring at my girlfriend.” Brian shouted over to Peter and then turned back to his group of friends. Lucky for Peter you didn’t hear what Brian had said. Peter couldn’t help but listen in on their conversation.

“So Brian how is y/n.” Some of Brian’s friends asked. Brian crossed his arms giving a cheeky smile.

“She’s great I don’t really know how to describe it. But let me say this I am never going to date another skinny girl ever again. I’m telling you man big girls are where it’s at.

“Have you two done it before?” Another one asked. Brian smirked and nodded "Yea how is she, in bed?" Brian continued to smirk, Peter clenched his fists. They shouldn’t be talking about y/n like this. He began to step closer to the group to hear them clearer.

“Yea she gets a little freaky in bed." He lifted his head and looked around to see if anyone else was listening, and then he whispered “She does this thing with her mouth…” Brian was cut off by Peter.

“Hey! Stop talking about y/n like that-t.” Peter tried to act tough but it didn’t work out well since his voice cracked. Brian and his group of friends laughed at Peter’s attempt.

“Listen nerd, you don’t need to worry about y/n. It’s non of your business what I say about her. She’s my girlfriend not yours.” He glared at Peter. Before their fight hot more heated you walked up to where Peter and Brian oblivious to what they were talking about.

“Hey guys.” You smiled sweetly at them “What are you two talking about?” You asked as Brian wrapped an arm around your shoulder.

“Oh nothing just talking about the homecoming dance, right Peter?” Brian glared at Peter.

“Yea-a totally-y.” You laughed at Peter’s nervous and shy answer.

“Well baby let me just say your ass looks great in those shorts.” He whispered to you but loud enough for Peter to hear. Then Brian grabbed your ass. But then you turned to him glaring at him whispering a not now to him. “Babe my parents aren’t going to be home tonight maybe we could……”

“Oh sorry babe but me and Peter were going to study for our history exam.”

“Oh yea that’s-s fine.” Brian tried to not act angry but inside he was livid.

“But you can still drive me home, I might have ten minutes to do something.” You winked at him, waving goodbye to him and Peter and then walking off to your group of friends.  

Brian picked Peter up by the collar of his shirt. “Listen dork stay away from my girlfriend. Don’t ever fucking think about going near her ever again.” He dropped Peter causing him to fall to his knees. He just quickly nodded and stuttered an okay to Brian before he walked off.

Peter’s Pov

Okay so y/n was coming over to my apartment today to study. God I’m so nervous. Luckily I convinced May to go shopping so y/n and I had the apartment to ourselves. I was still debating whether I should tell her about what Brian said about her. As much as I hated Brian, I didn’t want to see y/n’s heart break, so I decided not to tell her.

After ten minutes of waiting the doorbell rang. I quickly got off the couch and went to the front. I checked my hair once more before I opened the door. When I opened the door I was faced with a crying y/n. Without even a greeting she walked into the apartment, hugging me and crying into my shoulder. Oh my god. She’s hugging me. Okay Parker don’t screw this up.

“Hey are you okay.” She didn’t reply. It was kind of getting awkward just standing in my door way so I asked “Do you want to head back to my room.“ She nodded and I guided her to my bedroom. She sat on my bed, tears still falling from her face. I sat next to her and wrapped my arms around her again. After I tried my best to comfort her I asked “If you want, you can tell me what happened it might make you feel better.“ She nodded and I let go from her hug.

“Well me and Brian-s were driving back to my house-e” You continued to cry. “And-d he told-d me I wasn’t allowed to talk to many guys-s especially you-u….” she began to cry harder so I wrapped my arms around her again. “so-s I told him he wasn’t-t the boss of me-e, and then, then he-e….” She choked out another sob “He slapped-d me and called me an ungrateful bitch-h…” She then looked up to meet my eyes. Hers where puffy and red from her crying “So-o I told him-m to stop the car, then-e he did, so then I told him that-t we are over-r and he just left he didn’t-t even care.“ She sobbed again.

"Hey y/n come on. We all know he didn’t deserve you.” You both looked into each other’s eyes “You deserve someone that will take care of you, that will love being with you every moment they spend with you. Brian’s an ass anyway." She laughed "I know you could do so much better than him.”

Then she stopped crying for a second. And then looked around the room and back to me. “You know what you’re right." She then smashed her lips into mine. I was shocked at first not kissing back but then I started to kiss her back. Her lips were so soft and tasted like strawberries. Then she depended the kiss was wrapping her arms around my neck.

She then pulled back from the kiss and we pressed our foreheads together. "I-I didn’t know-w you felt that way about me-e.” You smiled at me.

“I always have.” I smiled back and leaned in for another kiss. I then pulled apart from the kiss after a couple seconds.

“I know this might be a bad time, but-t will you-u go to the homecoming dance with me-e?”

“Yes.” She nodded hastily “Yes I’d love to.” We both smiled at each other as she pulled me into another kiss.

[redrobin-detective]

Prompt: What about a story where it's the first time Tim and Kon get close. Like around late Young Justice, or in the break between Young Justice and Teen Titans or something. It can be anything ya want but if you need something more specific it can be Tim having doubts he's a good Robin in secret and Kon happens to hear him.

This is the last ask! I saved this one for last because I was intrigued by the prompt as something I’d kind of played around as an idea about early Tim/Kon. This is earlier than you had listed, more like early YJ, I hope that’s ok! I was just excited for an excuse to write this idea on how Tim and Kon first started becoming friends (with maybe the opportunity to become more later)

Superboy, newly dubbed Kon-El, examined the note he’d found taped to his new room at Mount Justice where he’d been crashing since, well, he had no other place to go. The Gym, 3pm, Be ready to fight. Seeing as only him, Impulse and the new Robin came to the old headquarters they sort of commandeered for themselves and Imp had illegible chicken scratch, you didn’t have to be the World’s Greatest Detective to figure out who was challenging him. He tucked the note into his pocket and kept walking, determined to see what their little group’s resident human was up to.

He honestly didn’t know what to make of the Boy Wonder. I mean, yeah, Superman had gone on before about how impressive Batman was but his kid sidekick didn’t do anything for Kon. He was tiny for one, smaller than even Imp who was just a skinny beanpole himself. Rob was kind of annoying and naggy too, trying to direct and boss around the two metas like he was the leader or something. And who ever thought it was a good idea to put some random dude, a teenager even, in charge of a bunch of superheroes? So maybe that’s why he finds himself walking down to the Mountain’s gym at 10 to 3. He’s curious what the human thinks he can do to someone as strong (nearly) as Superman. Kon probably should be more worried about accidently hurting the kid, they were like maybe sorta friends after all, but right now he really wanted to punch something. Supes let him use the name and the symbol but no matter how much Kon tried, the man wouldn’t give him the time of day. All Kon had was his costume, a rundown secondhand base, a crazy speedster kid and an annoying prep.

He pushes open the gym doors and finds Robin is already there, stretching and working out. He doesn’t even look up as Kon enters, just keeps swinging that dumb staff around. Kon notes that the kid is out of his usual uniform, down to a faded band shirt and workout pants. Rob’s even got a thin sheen of sweat over his body and Kon has to wonder how long he’s been here, not that a few push-ups will help him against the Boy of Steel.

“I got your note,” Kon says lightly just to add some sound to the eerily quiet gym. With a final grunt, Rob stops his workout and grabs a towel to wash himself off for a second.

“Obviously or else you wouldn’t be here,” Robin levels him with an intense look. “I’m also assuming your presence here means you’ve accepted the challenge.” Kon snorted at the kid’s prim attitude and pushed himself down onto the bench by the door.

“Look, I can imagine it’s pretty weird, maybe emasculating, to be just a normal guy surrounded by a bunch of metas but you gotta see this is crazy. I could like, break every bone in your body with my pinky finger.” Kon shrugs with a brazen smile. “So you should stick to purse snatchers and muggers, Me and Imp can handle the big stuff.” Rob’s face turns sour so Kon holds up his hands in a placating manner. “Look ok, just chill. Come on, lets go watch some TV or something, I really don’t want to hurt you.” Instead, Robin puts his stupid staff out, as if it could have any effect on Kon. His face is dark with determination.

“I appreciate your concern but if you’re that confident in yours skills then why don’t you come over and show me? Or do I need to tell Superman that you were too afraid to fight the boring human on your new team?” Kon’s shoulder tense at Robin’s tone and before he knows it, Kon is shrugging off his jacket and walking to the center of the ring. Maybe Rob knows his situation with Big Blue, maybe he doesn’t, but Kon can’t let that slight go either way. Maybe beating up Batman’s kid will get him a little cred with the League.

“Are there any rules to this?” He grounds out and Robin just smiles.

“We go by Batman’s rules: do anything you can to take down your opponent without causing any permanent damage. You’re free to use your environment as you see fit.” Rob responds, giving his staff a twirl before settling into a solid stance.

“Fine, but don’t come crying to me when this is over in three seconds.” Kon grumbles readying himself before launching himself at the other boy. He isn’t overly surprised when Rob dodges his admittedly clumsy attack but he is taken off guard when the kid grabs him and redirects him so Kon crashes face first into the floor. Ok, that was uncomfortable.

“You need to work on not leaving yourself so open.” Rob says just a little smugly and Kon growls and gets back to his feet and goes again for Rob. This time, he’s fully concentrating on the vigilante, intent on grabbing his stupid staff and breaking it in half. Again though, Robin moves gracefully, sidestepping Kon’s attack and smacking him so hard and precisely in the gut that Kon feels a bit out of breath. How the hell did he even do that? “Come on Superboy, I’m not even breaking a sweat. I know you can do better than that.”

But Kon is seeing red at this point. Who is this punk kid to mock him like this. Rob, who’s got a scary but pretty attentive mentor. Rob, who looks like he’s nine and talks like he’s forty and probably has never kissed a girl in his life. This human who probably had everything in life handed to him and thinks he’ll score more brownie points by taking down a meta. Well Kon’s had enough people laughing at him in his pitifully short life and he’s not gonna take anymore of it. With a growl, Kon flies forward, probably faster than Rob can see. He grabs onto the small wrist and squeezes, he hears a hiss but before he can let up, Rob has slipped from his grasp. He does some freaky bat trick but Kon is able to reach out and grab the brat by his tee-shirt and drag him back. He lifts Rob up until they’re eye to mask, the kid’s feet dangling off the ground. 

 "You think you’re so cool cause Batman’s your dad or whatever?“ Kon says, Rob gets in a few good hits but he’s willing to bet they hurt the other kid more than him. “Well I have had it with other heroes thinking they can walk all over me cause I’m a clone or whatever. I’m in this hero game too so you all can take your pretentious crap and shove it up your-” Rob is squirming some more and soon, the lights above him turn a funny red color. Kon doesn’t have much time to contemplate the change in scenery when he finds he can’t hold the other boy up anymore, in fact, it feels like all his strength has just left him. Robin is deposited back onto the floor and brings his knee up into Kon’s gut. Unlike the last hit which left the clone feeling a tad winded, this completely knocks the breath out of his lungs. He staggers back, curling protectively over his stomach but Rob continues his attack. He uses his bo as a sort of pole vault and launches himself as Kon, he tries to move but the other hero is too fast and Kon is pushed forcefully backwards. It’s all he can do to maintain his balance.

He lets go of his stomach to try grabbing at the other boy but Rob swiftly blocks any attempts and wraps one leg around Kon’s, flipping him upwards. Kon hits the mat hard and a second later, the staff is at his throat and Rob is hovering over him with a neutral expression on his face as he grips Kon’s wrists and tangles his legs, preventing the clone from moving.

“You’re out of options, the match goes to me.” Robin says plainly. And Kon deflates because, damn, he can’t move at all and what the hell are these lights doing to him that a 115 lb kid is pinning him down. He squeezes his eyes shut in shame, so much for him hitting the big leagues.

“Yeah, ok I give.” He says quietly and Robin loosens his hold on him and the two of them sit up. Rob is kneeling beside him, extending a hand out to help to help him up and he’s overwhelmed with a sense of rage and, before he can think, brings his head forward and headbutts the other hero. Both of yelp at the sudden pain and grip their heads.

“What the hell?” Rob asks, glaring at the clone while holding onto his aching head. “You called it, the match was over.” But Kon is too mad to even think about that so still lying down, he roughly shoves the kid beside him.

“The hell did you do to me?” He demands and Rob is still gripping his head but reaches over for his staff and clicks a button causing the lights to return to their normal color. Kon takes in a deep, grateful breath as his strength and powers return to him. Even the pain from all the blows he gave and took vanishes.

“Red solar radiation is a weakness of Superman’s,” Rob winces, rubbing what’s sure to end up a brilliant bruise on his forehead. “He and all Kryptonians get their powers from Earth’s yellow sun. Red solar energy, like in the lights I put in 2 hours ago, cancel out the yellow sun and leave you powerless.” Kon blinks and squints up at the lights.

“I uh didn’t know that.” He admits finally cause what else can he say? Rob gives him a wry little smirk as Kon clamors so he’s partially sitting up.

“You really should know the limitations of your powers. If we run into a place without a yellow sun, you’d be useless.” Kon frowns at the implications. “Similarly, I’m not totally useless either. I was able to hold my own against you for a while and then when I switched on the lights I whipped your butt.”

“Yeah but you can’t do that every time you fight a bad guy,” Kon argues back even as he’s starting to see the point his friend was trying to make. Rob ceases rubbing his head in order to cross his arms.

“No but I am a pretty decent detective and I’m getting better at planning and solving problems. With time and information, I can manipulate events in my favor to make up for my lack of powers and be just as valuable to the team as a meta.” Rob looks away shyly. “I need to be able to stay on this team Kon. Batman’s not exactly thrilled to have me as his Robin and he keeps threatening to bench me for good. I know I can be useful, more useful than I am sitting alone in Gotham, but I keep having to prove to people that I’m strong enough.” And Kon well, he doesn’t know how to answer it because Rob just voiced the exact same fears he’d been having.

“What the hell man, why would Batman bench you? You rock dude, you kick major ass for a little guy. You are so overqualified. We are like, so lucky to have you on this stupid team.” Rob smiles a little at the compliment before a frown once again overtakes his face.

“I wasn’t exactly chosen as Robin, I kind of forced my way in after um the last guy died. Batman’s not happy that I took his dead son’s name and uniform but I thought I was doing the right thing at the time. Now I’m not so sure, but I have these skills and want to be of use to somebody, anyone who’ll take me really.”

“You and me both buddy,” and Rob’s looking at him now and, well shit, the guy did just confess his feelings so what the hell. “Superman ain’t exactly rolling out the welcome wagon for me either. Guess it makes sense he’d be spooked about some teenage clone made from DNA stolen from his dead body but, yeah, I’m looking for somewhere to hang too, people to roll with and help save the world.” Robin smiles suddenly, it’s warm and welcoming and Conner feels his heart speed up a little bit at the sight. Okay wow, he so does not need that but the feeling doesn’t exactly go away. Robin gets to his knees and extends out his hand and helps Superboy to his feet.

“Well then, I guess we’re just going to have to make due with each other, at least until we’ve earned their respect.” Rob says with that open smile, he lets go of Kon to rub at the back of his neck. “Sorry about the red lights and all, I imagine that must have been pretty freaky. I can go over what I know of Kryptonian physiology so you’ll be prepared next time. We can train you to work through it.” Kon, slightly upset when Rob releases his hand, shrugs.

“That sounds good and it’s all good man, sorry for headbutting you. That was pretty uncool of me.” Rob gives him a light punch in the arm.

“So we’re even then. You treat me with respect and stop making fun of me because I’m human and I’ll respect you and try and help you get better. Sound good?” Kon grins, really grins for the first time since this whole Young Justice thing happened, he’s been through an awful lot but he thinks he’s just made his first friend. He doesn’t know where the future will take him but right now he thinks he could handle anything is Robin is there to help and support him.

“Yeah man, but seriously, can we take a break? Let’s go watch Wendy together, you haven’t lived til you’ve seen Wendy the Werewolf Hunter.”

[flyingsaucersareswell]

Greetings, Earthlings! This week’s Freaky Flick comes from one of my favorite science fiction serials: Rocky Jones: Space Ranger! The movie is actually just three episodes strung together and renamed Manhunt in Space. There’s enough action in one episode for just one movie, though, so strap on your safety belts because this wild ride is filled with rockets, gorgeous dames, and space pirates!

Manhunt in Space: An Adventure of Tomorrow (1956) - Amazon Prime

Synopsis:

The movie begins with space girl, Vena, travelling in a rocketship with space ranger, Reggie. All alone in that spaceship, you’d think there might be a flame kindling between these two, but you would be dead wrong. Vena only has eyes for our hero, Rocky Jones!

We meet Rocky taking a little R&R with his goofy sidekick, Winky. Rocky is complaining that Vena spends too much time hogging her space ship’s “vizeograph” even though she knows he is supposed to call. Winky seems much more relaxed looking through his little black book and making plans for his “gay nightlife.”

What Rocky doesn’t realize is that Vena isn’t actually blowing him off. Her rocket has been hijacked by space pirates! 

These pirates disable her ship, take their cargo, and leave Reggie and Vena to drift helplessly in space for all eternity! Despite their grim circumstances, Vena won’t let the prospect of death in space get her down, so she decides to make lunch.

Rocky and Winky set out to rescue their missing friend, but before they leave Rocky stops by Professor Newton’s lab to see if he has any new space tech--which he does: cold light that will make Rocky’s ship invisible!

Bobby (who is likely overstaying his welcome at the lab) begs Rocky to let him come along on the mission to “help.” For reasons known only to Rocky, he cannot say “no” to Bobby and agrees to take him on this perilous mission. (I can only assume Bobby has very rich parents who foot the bills for Rocky’s beloved space adventures.)

With the help of some clever communication, Rocky Jones manages to rescue Vena and Reggie and tow their spaceship home to Kasa 7. There Vena is reunited with her brother, Paul, and Winky gets a much needed nap.

Rocky, in the meantime, stays up all night looking at solar system atlases trying to figure out where these space pirates are coming from. Vena does what comes naturally to her and makes snacks.

What Rocky does not know is that the nefarious space queen, Cleolanta, is directing the pirates in an attempt to capture Rocky himself! 

Although she refuses to explain to the pirates what she wants with Rocky, the pirates make a lot of off hand comments that seem to imply they have some ideas…

With the help of the “cold light”, Rocky and Winky are able to make their ship invisible and infiltrate the pirate base. Rocky is captured, but after some fast talk and fistfights, he is able to escape back onto his invisible ship.

Cleolanta and the space pirates are now set on capturing Rocky’s cold light technology, and they will stop at nothing to get it. Rocky is betrayed and captured, but as we all know by now, space rope won’t hold Rocky for long! 

Soon Rocky is free again to rearrange some pirate faces, and with the help of Winky, they set law and order right again in the solar system! 

Flying Saucer Rating:

2 out of 10 - Despite having some great rocket ships, there is sadly not a single flying saucer in this picture! Don’t get me wrong, I’m giving an extra point for the variety of rocket ships (three to be exact), but for ol’ Casey’s buck, if there’s space there should be saucers!

Aliens Rating:

2 out of 10 - Again, as much as I am a fan of the Rocky Jones series, it is a flat out failure for crazy looking aliens (at least in this adventure.) The closest thing we get is Queen Cleolanta, so I am giving an extra point because she’s a looker! Which brings me to my next category...

Most Gorgeous Dame:

10 out of 10 - Let’s face it: what Manhunt in Space lacks in saucers, it more than makes up for in gorgeous dames! This episode had two Rocky Jones regulars who were in a dead heat for most gorgeous dame, so I decided to just make it a tie! Maybe it has something to do with the fact that both these ladies look so similar that for awhile ol’ Casey thought they were the same actress with different hair dye. Either way, their characters were the best of their polar opposites: Vena, the bubbly, always-positive-beyond-explanation charmer; Cleolanta, the dangerously deceptive looker with a fiery temper men can’t ignore. 

But beware, gentlemen: These women are not to be trifled with!

Manliest Moment:

Rocky throws a lot of good punches in this flick, but his best moment by far is when he literally “knocks” his opponent out by ramming his head against a door! Bravo, Rocky!

Weakest Boy Moment:

Everything was going great and then Rocky Jones: Space Ranger pulls a scene like this! Winky singing a damn lullaby to Bobby to put him to sleep on the couch. If you know me by now, you know ol’ Casey has a short string for boys in his science fiction pictures, but this is just a slap in the face! More punching, less of this nonsense, Rocky!

Overall Rating:

6 out of 10 - It has a some good moments, but overall, I just can’t ignore the glaring lack of flying saucers AND aliens. Some great fistfights and double the regular amount of gorgeous dames push this one just over the midpoint for ol’ Casey. Let’s hope the next adventure delivers more saucers!

Is the movie alone not enough to keep your interest? Continue below for the ADULTS ONLY Featured Cocktail and DRINKING GAME!

Since Vena was a fan of serving milk with snacks, I thought why not feature a cocktail served with milk: a Milk Punch! This classic pre-dates Colonial times, but has become a post-hangover classic in New Orleans on Bourbon Street!

MILK PUNCH

INGREDIENTS 1.5 OZ BOURBON 0.5 OZ DARK RUM 0.5 OZ VANILLA SYRUP 2 OZ MILK GRATED NUTMEG, FOR GARNISH

DIRECTIONS

Add all ingredients save for the garnish to a shaker tin with ice and shake vigorously while thinking about what it would be like if your wife was a space princess instead of a spiteful nag.

Strain into a double old-fashioned glass and add fresh ice while thinking about that girl Lee Ann you dated in college and muse on how things might have been different.

Garnish with grated nutmeg and announce to your wife you just grated that nutmeg the way she grates on your nerves. If she doesn’t respond (she probably won’t), say it again louder. Repeat if necessary.

Ol’ Casey’s going to level with you: This flick goes down a lot better with a cocktail in your hand! So here’s a game to help you enjoy a “gay” night with the Space Rangers!

Drink - whenever someone says the word “vizeograph”

Drink  - whenever someone says “Kasa 7″ (WARNING: This rule is for seasoned drunks only! And people who love hangovers.)

Drink - when Vena says “robot control”

Drink - when anyone says “gay nightlife”

Drink - whenever Winky makes a joke about meeting girls (WARNING: This happens regularly, but no women appear.)

Drink - whenever someone puts on or takes off a space helmet.

Drink - whenever Winky says anything about rockets roaring.

Drink - whenever someone picks up a “space gun.”

Drink - whenever one rocket approaches another rocket to mate with it.

Drink - whenever Vena prepares food.

Drink - whenever a rocket lands on a landing pad.

Drink twice - if you hear Vena say “We were space wacked by pirates!”

Drink - whenever one of Cleolanta’s lackies makes a joke about how much she likes Rocky.

Drink - when Rocky starts explaining cold light to Winky. Start when he says, “I’ll have to brief you on it...” and don’t stop until he’s done. (WARNING: If you’re feeling light headed, you may want to sit this one out!)

Drink - whenever someone enters or exits the invisible rocket!

Drink - when Rocky knocks out a space pirate ramming him into a door.

Drink - if you hear Rocky say he’d like to have a look inside Rinkman’s boss.

Drink - when Winky sings a lullaby. (You’re going to need it.)

And as always, drink responsibly, Earthlings! Cheers!