#her faking being otherkin and fictionkin

[rowanwolf]

Talking About 'Linking

I don't talk much about being a fictionlinker. Mainly because that's voluntary. I talk much more about being a wolf and a gryphon and a kitsune, because I didn't chose to be those things. Theriotypes and kintypes aren't chosen, so I feel a little more free to talk about them. But linktypes are chosen. And I think there's a sort of gatekeep-y weirdness about not being able to (or not feeling that I'm able to) talk about my linktype. And I want to kind of get into that a bit.

I am, on the whole, against KFF. If you're not familiar with that term, it means "kin for fun." Not because I feel there's anything inherently wrong with taking on an identity voluntarily, even just for fun. My opposition to it comes from the terminology. "Kin" is our word - and not a verb. It's shorthand for "otherkin" and widely used in the otherkin and therian community. As I said, I don't feel there's anything wrong with taking on an identity because you want to, but use the right term. That's what the terms "linktype" and "link" exist for. The issue with KFFers is that they've hijacked the community's terminology and invaded spaces that are refuges for otherkin and therians. And then the bigger issue is that a lot of them (from what I've seen) turn around and call those of us who are actually otherkin or therians crazy. Because our identities are genuine.

So I do really advocate for the use of the terms "otherlink" and "-linker" and "-linking." It just helps distinguish actual 'kin from folkel who have taken on their identity voluntarily. But at the same time, I don't feel that I can talk about having done so myself. I have a copinglink that I've developed. Firekeeper helps me deal with stress and stressful situations. She started out as mainly to do with things relating to my therianthropy. She's physically human, but was raised by wolves and identifies as a wolf. Over time, she's become something that helps me deal with stress in general. And I took her on voluntarily. She's a part of me, but she was a choice I made and she feels very different to me than my theriotypes and kintypes.

On topic, though, I don't typically feel like I can talk about my linktype, because I don't want to be seen as "faking it." But just because that one identity is voluntary, that doesn't mean the rest are. I'm not a wolflinker or a gryphonlinker, I'm a wolf therian and gryphonkin. But I am not fictionkin, I'm a fictionlinker. They're different things. And I feel that, although my experience as a fictionlinker is different than my experience as otherkin (I feel that's maybe closer to fictionkin than therianthropy, since my kintypes are mythical creatures) there are similarities: I find a great deal of euphoria and comfort in reading Firekeeper's source and I do shift involuntarily at times - although I think that may be more that my brain has decided this is a good coping mechanism for stress. I have an extremely strong attachment to her and to her brother, Blind Seer. He feels like family to me.

But I don't want folkel to look at my having a linktype and immediately label me a fake or a KFFer as far as actually being a therian and otherkin. And that's a divide I think needs to be addressed. If folkel would use the correct terminology, I think that would be a good start. Having that established, separate terminology would help create a distinction of space and give room for respectful discussion. I know one thing I've heard mentioned with regard to issues with calling KFFers problematic is that some of them might be actual otherkin or therians who just haven't figured that out yet. And I think having that division of space would actually help that. It would give folkel with voluntary identities - 'linkers - their own space within the broader alterhuman community. If 'linkers were able to interact with the otherkin community in a manner that respected our 'kin identities as real and genuine and not chosen, it would allow for better discourse. And while you'd still get those folks who decide we're nuts for believing our identities to be true, I think that calming of the hostilities that have come largely from KFFers trying to invade 'kin spaces could allow 'linkers who are actually otherkin or therians to be able to discuss and explore that facet of their identities.

I don't know, that's just my two cents. I'm old and first joined the community when therians and otherkin were still very much separate (hence my distinction in my referring to them), but I think that with a respect for boundaries, things could improve greatly. I do have more to say about Firekeeper, but I'm going to make that a separate post. I feel this is probably the outer bounds of this post's topic.

[indigo-villin]

New Intro Post

Hello my name is Indigo and this is my main blog, my pronouns are he/they/it/fae/tv. I do and post many things here like agere content, therian content, otherkin content, fandom stuff, random art I enjoy, and other more random things. I am 24 and I age regress to ages 4-18 (it's in stages, 4-8, 9-12, 13-18). I'm a cat therian, mermaid/siren otherkin, and fictionkin with Starlight Glimmer (mlp), Haruhi Fujioka (ohschc), Roxanne Wolf (fnaf), Queen Chrysalis (mlp), Luigi (mario franchise), Phone guy (fnaf), and Puddle Slime (slime rancher), also plantkin (willow tree).

Fandoms/fav franchises:

-Batim/batdr+ -FNAF (not so much the books, too poor) -Little nightmares series -Slime rancher series -Outlast (not 2) -Uncharted series -Indigo Park -Spyro games -Welcome to the game franchise -Other one-off games (among the sleep, paleo pines, wobbledogs, ABZU, poppy playtime) -TADC -Care bears -Anything involving puppets (mfn, dark crystal, sesame street, welcome home, etc) -MLP (all gens, not as much with g5 haven't caught up) -Monster high (all gens, g3 has been great) -Dolls (18 inch, decora girlz, rainbow high, furry/cutie reveal barbies, blythe, lol surprise, lol omg, lol tweens love the tweens most, crybaby bffs, cave club, mermaid high, etc) -Smaller toys (LPS, zombaes, zoobles, zhu zhu pets, puppy/kitty/jungle/etc in my pocket, shopkins, hatchimals, capsule machine toys)

~~I have other blogs~~

@dollie219 my doll account

@multi-soup my system account

@indigo-rants my vent/rant account

@b3h3mo7h my OC blog for my OC/fursona Snowball the moth

@indigo-bies an OC blog for my closed species OCs the Necrobies (and associated subspecies)

All accounts are set up as being my side accounts/attached to this one.

~DNI under cut~

DNI:

-Homophobic people/TERFS/FARTS/Transphobic people -Ableist people/people who don't believe x disorder "actually exists"/people who believe "everyone's a lil autistic"/also people who say you don't have x because y ie fake claiming. (YOU are the problem) -SWERFs (sex work is WORK regardless of the type. These workers deserve to be treated with respect PERIOD.) -Racists/Nazis/Israel supporters (Free Palestine 🍉) -Pedos("MAPs")/Zoophiles (pro contact specifically) -Anti-endo/anti-non traumagenic people -Ageplay, ddlg, abdl, etc accounts (this is an agere account, NOT a kink blog) -Conservatives/Republicans/Christians that throw it in people's faces all the time -Anti-agere/Anti-petre/Anti-furry/Anti-Therian/Anti-Otherkin/Anti-neopronouns/Anti-xenogender -"AI art" accounts -People who call things/people cringe -Transid/transdx (self diagnosis is a valid thing but claiming you transitioned to have a disorder isn't) -Transrace/transage/other trans x thing to mean you transitioned to something that you can't physically transition to (not counting being too poor for surgeries this is specifically about people wanting diff skin tones and/or being "seen as younger cause they're transitioning to be" you age up not down shut up, either age regress alone or fuck off)

These next ones are just personal

-People who hate Starlight from MLP (I kin her) -People who hate Snow White (fav princess) -People that complain about how monster high g3 is "less than g1" or whatever -People who complain/bad mouth mlp g5 -FNAF fans who go and complain about X and Y fans "not being true fans" (just shut up you're being childish/immature) -FNAF fans who don't understand that "The Tales From the Pizzaplex" books ARE canon to Security Breach and its DLC. (They've LITERALLY explained this when they were getting released)

[who-is-page]

hey, do you have any posts on the history of the kin community and the origin of the word? I just had an encounter with someone who said that fictionkin and otherkin are somehow different from just kin by itself... :P

I don't have any specific posts on that-- or rather, I'm sure I do, but they're buried in my tags and unfindable.

The standalone word "kin" meaning one's family or relations is, of course, a word that predates the otherkin and related community; but I have a feeling that in this ask, the individual you were involved with was either arguing that the shorthand of otherkin, 'kin, is somehow separate from the community (which it isn't-- it's shorthand for a reason!) or was arguing that people who inly ever use kin as a verb to mean "to stan," "to like," "to relate to," or "to take on the aesthetics of for fun," are separate from the otherkin community, which yes, they are.

For the former, "'kin as shorthand," that one seems pretty self-explanatory: sometimes, you get tired of typing out "otherkin" in a post or essay repetitively, and shorten it to just 'kin. You can even see the shorthand applied to anti-otherkin, who are often just shortened to being called "anti-kin" or "antikin." With that said, here's one older example of an excerpt by ex-Therianthrope Lupa Greenwolf from her A Field Guide to Otherkin, which uses 'kin as a shorthand: A Day in the Life of Otherkin.

For the latter, "kin for fun" or "KFF," as it's sometimes called nowadays, the history is a bit more fraught, but no: people like this are not otherkin, therian, nor fictionkin just for stanning celebrities nor for really liking specific characters. Otherkinity and identities related to it are considered to be about identifying as and on some level recognizing oneself as being something either partially or entirely nonhuman-- most typically through psychological or spiritual explanations or reasoning, but not always limited to just those two. These identities can be silly and fun in their own right, but if someone is just having silly fun in fandom spaces by picking out their annual blorbos or squeeing over the latest pop star RPF then that's a separate phenomena. It's still perfectly valid for people to do! It's just not something that makes people otherkin.

KFF evolved from anti-otherkin shenanigans in the mid-2010's: with anti-otherkin constantly insisting that otherkinity was a choice and a common experience that anyone could have but that people who called themselves otherkin were taking "too far." Some popular bloggers ended up picking up on this rhetoric, believing the anti-kin and spreading it further (usually also alongside the ableism, sanism, and bizarre antisemitism that anti-kin would push with it, which explains a lot of the rhetoric from KFF that's been aimed at otherkin in the past that I've seen).

One particular fictionkin blogger who later ended up being revealed to be a fake--a cis-woman who was revealed to have been lying about her race, her gender identity/status as a transgender person, and other things potentially besides for the sake of Internet Clout--YandereBitchClub, especially caused problems in the community and could even be argued to in some ways be the true founder of the KFF community from 2014~ish. She pushed narratives of kin as a voluntary, social justice/morality-related, fandom concept, saying things such as how queer individuals couldn't have fictotypes with characters who were straight/cis, and that "problematique" fictotypes meant you were actually an evil person IRL. Lots of harassment brigades, lots of being genuinely cruel and awful to actual fictionkin, this person and the resounding ideas that people took from them are in a lot of ways responsible for the fictionkin cultural crash of the mid-to-late 2010's. But she's not the only popular blogger who's spread misinformation, we've also seen it from people like Normal-Horoscopes and popular YouTubers like the Amazing Athiest (yuck).

So KFF aren't otherkin, and are much closer to just a subset of anti-otherkin based on everything. If they were placed on a timeline graph would look more something like...this:

Some sources below.

General Sources:

“Otherkin - People who identify either partially or wholly as one or more non-human beings, entities, or concepts in a psychological or spiritual manner.” (2015, Kinmunity.com, now defunct. RIP)

Otherkin timeline: The recent history of elfin, fae, and animal people, v. 2.0 (Unabridged). by Orion Scribner

Otherkin Lexicon: A multi-lingual dictionary of jargon used in the communities of otherkin, therianthropes, and other similar peoples. by Orion Scribner

Addendums to Scribner’s The Otherkin Timeline. by House of Chimeras

Examples of Otherkin defined as identifying as something nonhuman over the years:

“Otherkin, n. [Coined 1990 by Torin / Darren Stalder in the Elfinkind Digest listserve. E. other additional, or different in kind from the one implied + E. kin family, kind, race. Pl. otherkin. Based on contemporary use of the word elfinkin or elvenkin for people who identify as elves. Spelling note: some authors spell “otherkin” with a capital O, some don’t, and some use either. Syn. otherkind (obsolete).]

1. (elven comm., early otherkin comm.) [1990 in the Elfinkind Digest listserve.] (Never commonly used. Obsolete in mid-1990s.) The below definition, but limited to refer only to people who identify as mythological creatures other than elves. With such usage, a group of people who identified as elves, dragons, and satyrs would be called “elfinkin and otherkin.”

2. (otherkin comm.) [Circa 1992?] (Now commonly used.) Otherkin are real, non-fictional people who identify as other than human. Otherkin identify as creatures from myth and legend, usually elves, faeries, and dragons. This is a sincere identity, not role-play. Many otherkin identify as other than human for spiritual reasons; that is, they classify their identity as otherkin as a personal spiritual belief. Being otherkin is a very individualistic thing: each otherkin reaches his own explanation for how and why he is an otherkin. Some of their common spiritual explanations include that they are other than human in spirit, or they were other than human in past incarnations. Although spiritual belief is often involved, “otherkin” isn’t a religion. As such, each person who identifies as otherkin practices whatever religion he individually wants. It has always been the case that most of the otherkin community practices Neo-Pagan religions, and so that religious perspective shapes the common views and ideas in the otherkin community. Some otherkin don’t use spiritual explanations. Some otherkin believe that they are physically other than human, or that their ancestors were.

3. (otherkin, dragon, and therian communities) [Circa 2006] The above definition, but expanded to also include people who identify as animals (therianthropes). Less often, some people use the word “otherkin” as an even larger umbrella term to include otherkin, therianthropes, and vampires. A more appropriate umbrella term has yet to be made.

4. (fiction, outside of the otherkin comm.) [Circa 2006] Starting around 2006, several novelists later appropriated (or independently coined?) the term “otherkin” to refer to fictional, physically supernatural entities. In those novels, the term “otherkin” doesn’t refer to real kinds of people Otherkin Lexicon O. Scribner 25 who simply feel other-than-human at heart. Those authors include paranormal romance novelists Nina Bangs, Anya Bast, and Delilah Devlin.″ (2013, Orion Scribner’s Otherkin Lexicon)

“Personally I would describe Otherkin as any person who believes that they are, in some way, other than their kin (kin being humans), and kin to the other (the other being non-terrestrial/mythical/religious/etc. entities). This belief is something that can be spiritual or psychological but, at its core, it is a belief and not a physical condition.” (2013, Tumblr Otherkin FAQ from someone who has been in the community for 14+ years, since their description hasn't been updated in the last five years.)

“Otherkin: There are two main definitions of this term, and both are provided here so as to denote the prevalence of both definitions being used often.  One definition is that otherkin is a general, overarching term for those people who feel they are in part or whole [non-physically] non-human, with one or more non-human otherkin types/aspects (also known as a ‘kintype); this is a category that therians are a subsection of, but it also includes a variety of other non-human creatures, including but not limited to mythical creatures.  The other definition is the same except that it is not as generalized of a category and instead only denotes the creatures that are mythical, fantastical, or non-Earth animals.” (2013 or before, Project Shift)

“Otherkin. (uh’ther-kin) n. A person who believes her/his self to be of another species in spirit, or in some other way identifies with a particular creature, usually of myth and legend. For example, a person who accepts that she/he is human in body, but believes herself/himself to be a faery in spirit, or that she/he has elven ancestry, etc. Plural: otherkin. No adjectival form.“ (2009, Otherkin News on Livejournal)

“[…] a person who believes that, through either a nonphysical or (much more rarely) physical means, s/he is not entirely human.” (2007, Lupa’s Field Guide to Otherkin)

[pricryo]

tw: abuse shit, manipulation shit, transphobia ment, death ment, christianity ment, probably more. hi i’m tim wright and today i remembered one of my abusers so naturally, while instilled with fiery rage, i thought i should make a post abt it here for reference as to why i have “don’t follow if you kin ticci-toby (creepypasta) or yato (noragami)” as one of my don’t follow criteria. there will probably be another post on this in the future because there’s really a lot to unravel about her abuse and how it’s affected myself and my friends. this is just one of the main and most notable incidents, roughly around the time our friendship truly started its decline.

putting this shit under a cut so it doesn’t clutter things up on anyone’s dash

her name is grace. i initially met her in the fourth grade (when i was around nine or ten), but i wasn’t really close friends with her until late middle school to early high school. she was always sort of uncomfortable to be around, but she was one of the few people who would talk to me, so i considered her a friend. when i was a freshman in high school, i had just been introduced to the otherkin and fictionkin communities by a friend (named cas) at the time, along with grace and another friend (her name was destiny). 

i kinfirmed being wolfkin first and foremost (i know, i know, how generic) after a lot of reflection and questioning on the subject, and cas, who was also wolfkin, suggested we make a wolfkin pack (a.k.a, mistake number one) under the presumption that all four of us were wolfkin. (hint: only half of us were)

grace agreed, claiming she was also wolfkin, and a pack was formed. now, this wasn’t the healthiest pack, realistically. we were young and honestly? a little dumb. we had this big ~pack mentality~ that was horrid and cringy to look back on, and i’m very ashamed of myself. we were overly protective of each other, saw cas as our boss, and overall were just... toxic in mindset, if i remember correctly. unfortunately, this made us super easy to manipulate.

it started in either january or february (i can’t remember which anymore), when grace told us that her long-time boyfriend (joe) had broken up with her during our high school’s winter formal dance. supposedly, it was during their first slow dance, to be specific. she claimed that he’d been abusive to her before, including hitting her, insulting her, etc., and destiny even backed this claim up by saying she’d seen it. (note: joe was openly known to be autistic in our school, keep this in mind.) we, of course, didn’t take this well. after confronting joe on the matter, he seemed confused and had genuinely no idea what was happening, even saying he hadn’t broken up with her at all.

we further confront him (this time on deviantArt) and he continues to say he has no idea, and he’s very confused over who we are. we... honestly treated him like trash. not because he was autistic, but because he was supposedly abusive. it was terrible. and while we’re doing this, grace is just feeding us more and more lies about the guy. she went as far as to make fake texts between himself and her, where he was saying shit like how we were demons, and that we needed to go to church and we needed jesus, calling grace fat and ugly, saying that he’d won her and she was just his trophy, and even being openly transphobic regarding leelah alcorn’s death, among other things. we would be like “give us his number/account, let us talk to him” and she’d always tell us “oh he deleted it right after” or some similar shit. that was red flag number one, but i trusted her (mistake number two) because she was my friend.

by this time, we're literally enraged. we told the dean of our school about it and everything. we were shit talking joe all over deviantArt and threatening him (which was so immature, and looking back on it, i hate how i handled that situation at 14) and everything. i deadass made what was supposed to be his in minecraft just to pour lava over it and burn it down. terrible shit. but the bottom line: we were very angry.

around this time, i start noticing that the way he types on deviantArt and the way he types in the “texts” don’t match up. it’s super suspicious. red flag number two. he types perfectly on deviantArt, but types exactly how grace types in the texts. i bring it up subtly and i’m all like “haha that’s pretty weird, why does he do that?” grace agrees that it’s weird and then starts saying that she recreated some of them because they were deleted too fast. the typing difference happened on all of them. again, that’s super suspicious, but i really trusted her as my friend.

things escalated. i can’t really remember most of it, but here’s some details i do remember:

there’s a fake instagram made (something along the lines of ‘weirdguy101′ or some similar shit) where art that cas and destiny had made was uploaded, supposedly owned by joe, who was claiming to have drawn it himself. none of my art was stolen. grace was the only person to have taken pictures of that art. red flag number three.

an “undercover” deviantArt account made by grace where she pretended to be a different person to interact with joe as if she was on our side.

a lot of skype calls on the subject - during one, grace calls joe on her home phone and cas and destiny make weird noises in an effort to freak him out - which was succesful.

we make both a deviantArt group and instagram to combat the fake instagram and make vague, threatening posts to him (which i’m very certain is deleted by this point).

the dean told us he spoke with joe, and that joe had zero idea what was happening at all.

we were going to go to the principal over the matter because we thought the dean didn’t take us seriously. i was absent that day because i was sick if i remember correctly, and cas and destiny didn’t go talk to the her because grace didn’t show up, either. red flag number four.

grace would intentionally rile us up if we weren’t having a conversation specifically about the conflict. like, this happened for weeks, and when we tried to have other, normal conversations, she’d butt in baout how much she hated joe and about how we should all burn down his house and shit. i’m fairly certain that some of the fake texts were just to draw our attention back on that topic. red flag number five.

and honestly? a hell of a lot more that i don’t really remember.

cas mentions that he thinks things are getting a little fishy after a while, and i tell him about what i’ve been thinking. we end up calling her on skype and he calls her out because he’s 100% certain that she had been playing us. she’s dead silent for most of the time and doesn’t even defend herself or say he’s wrong. he hangs up on her and i’m there listening to her crying alone (and it’s such an ugly noise, mind you) and i’m filled with disgust and anger and hurt. i’m there for two to three minutes listening before i hang up, too.

even after that, we’re all like, “we forgive you. just don’t do this shit again,” because we still saw her as a friend despite her 100% being trash to us, and we were still willing to move past that. and grace has the audacity to ask if we’ll go to the dean with her in the morning and explain the situation.  like.... she manipulates us into harassing and threatening a kid, pretends to be him and insults us + is transphobic as all hell, literally steals art from cas and destiny under the guise that it’s him, plays us like a game of chess for her own sick amusement.... and then expects us to help her explain to the dean that she was lying the entire time and nothing was wrong. ofc, we said no. things simmer down.

for like a day or two.

and then we’re in a group chat with a classmate named britney who says we need to stop bullying her friend. get this - grace has been showing off the screenshots of what we’ve said to her (which was in no way bullying, btw) and claiming we were bullying her. greaaaattt. grace didn’t bother to tell her the full story (a common theme with her) and now britney has taken it upon herself ot be a good samaritan. she yells at us, removes cas from the chat after one of his alters front, i add him back, and britney refuses to tell us who it was. (spoiler alert: we already know). i agree that we’ll stop “bullying” grace so she’ll leave us alone and the conversation is done.

so naturally we’re all like, “what the fuck dude, it was over? and we didn’t do anything to you? you were just bad to us?” and ofc this sets her off to continually tell us ”it’s in the past, i made mistakes, you should forgive me” even though all the shit she did was entirely intentional. initially i don’t want the reason why she did it, but i get progressively more frustrated and then start demanding to know why. she legitimately didn’t say anything other than “...” on the subject. considering how i was young and had a short fuse, i kinda go off on her abt it. because that’s such a fucking dick move. and she says “well idk what to say except sorry” as if she isn’t aware she can tell us why she did it.

i end up having a breakdown because i realize that i’m a total fucking monster who harrassed a kid and was manipulated into doing s and i don’t even get to know why. cas removes her from the group and we’re left to pick up the pieces.

i end up giving a handwritten note containing a formal apology to destiny and she agreed to give it to joe for me. all was well for a while with grace out of my life.

unfortunately, this was not the last incident i had with grace. i’ll post more on it some other time but like... dm me for her tumblr if you want to block her or some shit. she’s still out there and active on tumblr as far as i know.

bonus: a screenshot where i totally should’ve realized she was playing us, ft. me talking to joe

[komaeda-core]

a basic guide to kin, ‘linkers, and more

TW // UNCENSORED MENTIONS OF S//CIDE, M//RDER, AND D//EATH.

Before we start, just a preface. this is NOT A DISCOURSE POST. I don’t care if you think someone else’s personal belief is stupid. If someone believing they were a fictional character in a past life just makes you THAT angry, maybe you should idk. talk to an anger management counselor? 

I DO NOT CONDONE THE PEOPLE THAT STEAL DID TERMS AND CALL THEM KIN TERMS. IF ANY TERM I USE IN THIS POST IS A DID TERM, PLEASE LET ME KNOW SO I CAN CORRECT MY ERROR AND USE THE CORRECT TERMS!

I am personally fiction-kin. This means that i believe that I was a fictional character in a past life. That’s it! That’s really all there is to it. There are infinite possibilities for people to believe in, as we genuinely have no clue what happens before or after death. Its like any other belief someone may have, it’s just been designated as cringe and stupid. 

TERMS TO KNOW:

ID: Stands for identity! This is fairly synonymous with Kintype, as its your identity, just like kintypes. 

Kin: People who are kin come in two forms: Spiritual, and Psychological. Spiritual kin believe in reincarnation, and that they were one of their kintypes in a past life. Psychological kins however, believe that they really are that character. This type of kin encapsulates everything that is NOT a spiritual belief, whatever that may be, they fall under this category.

Kin-Shift: a kinshift is simply defined as when you feel much more connected to that particular kintype than usual! Psychological shifts are the most common, in which you begin to think and act a little bit more like the kintype you are shifted as at the moment. Phantom shifts are when you feel as if you are missing a body part/limb that one of your kintypes has. These are called astral limbs! Not to be confused with phantom limbs, which is a term used for amputees. PHANTOM LIMBS CAN BE SCIENTIFICALLY EXPLAINED, ASTRAL LIMBS CANNOT. This is kind of a no-brainer, but anyone who claims to be able to “physically shift” is duping you. The physical strain that would put on the body would quite literally kill you.

Kintype: Someones kintype is the character, animal, or mythological creature they are kin with! This is the correct terminology in the sentence “My kintype is Nagito Komaeda!” or “One of my kintypes is a cat.” 

Permashift: Similar to ID, this is a kintype that you tend to be in shift as for more than just a couple hours. This could be for days, weeks, or even months. 

Co-Shift: A co-shift is basically what it sounds like, it is when you experience more than one kinshift at once. Not much more to it! DO NOT CONFUSE THIS TERM WITH THE DID TERM CO-CON. THE TERM IS NOT INTENDED TO MIMIC, MOCK, OR STEAL THIS TERM.

Otherkin: People are under the otherkin umbrella are people who are kin with animals, mythological creatures, or anything else. Some distinctions that can be found under this are; Plantkin, Godkin, Lionkin, Catkin, etc. Fictionkin do not fall under this category! They are distinct different sub-genre of kin.

Kin mem/memory: A kin memory is a phenomena in which people who are spiritually kin will experience memories from one of their past lives. This can come thru a distinct feeling of deja vu, a flashback type moment, or a vivid dream that seems to coherent and fits into your canon too well to be just an ordinary dream. Psychological kins may experience kin mems as well, however i am not as versed in that so i am not the person to ask on that matter.

Kinsider: When you are determining whether a character, creature, being, or etc. is a kintype or not.

Synpath: A synpath is what most “new wave kinnies” mistake for being genuinely kin.This is a character that you sympathize with on a heavy level, and feel like you identify WITH them. You heavily relate to this character, and can see yourself in them. THIS IS NOT KIN. Having a synpath is perfectly fine. ITS FINE NOT TO BE KIN.

Linktypes: A ‘link is the voluntary way to be kin. People who ‘link identify as the entity they’re ‘linking with for fun, coping, or any other reason. ‘linkers can experience mems, shifts, and everything else. The major distinction is that ‘links are voluntary for whatever reason, while being kin IS NOT.

Fictionhearted/Hearttypes/Kithtypes/Fictionkith: Being fictionhearted is very often confused with being fictionkin to the untrained eye, however there are some fundamental differences. The two communities developed separately, and therefore have separate core ideas that categorize you as one or the other. Otherhearted means that you have a strong connection to the species specified, in the way that you feel as if they are your friends or family WITHOUT identifying spiritually or psychologically as these species. Hearttypes are characters/species that you identify WITH, but not AS. For example, someone that has Mikan Tsumiki as a hearttype would identify WITH her. When looking at her, there would be a distinct feeling of, “this is me,” or “this is what I’m supposed to be.” Fictionkith is just another word for the same thing! (Please correct me if I’m wrong, there aren’t many sources about the topic. If any fictionkith/fictionhearted people want to talk about their experience in the replies, please go for it! I’d love to hear more.)

Fictionflicker: Flickers are basically what the name implies, kintypes that aren’t permanent. Your kintype may be a flicker if, once you start to distance yourself from the source, it starts to “fade away.” Fictionflicker has a nearly identical dichotomy to being kin, but they eventually fade away. Kin mems, kin-shifts, and everything else occurs for them too! 

Factkin: Despite what people may tell you, people who are factkin are crossing a line that should not be crossed. It is identity theft to identify as a real living person, and disrespectful to identify as people who have passed. If you are factkin, I recommend looking into identity theft, talking to a therapist, and re-evaluating your beliefs. People who are factkin are genuinely harmful.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

DO NOT SAY “SWITCHING” OR “FRONTING” WHEN REFERRING TO A KINSHIFT. THIS IS ACTIVELY STEALING DID TERMS, AND RE-PURPOSING TERMS FROM A REAL MENTAL DISORDER AND MAKING THEM A PART OF YOUR BELIEF. 

“KINNING” IS NOT THE CORRECT TERMINOLOGY. THIS WAS CREATED BY PEOPLE WHO ARE ANTI-KIN TO DEMEAN THE MEANING OF BEING KIN, AND THE IDENTITY THAT COMES WITH IT.

WHILE “KINNIE” IS AN INSULT, IT IS NOT AND NEVER WILL BE A SLUR. STOP TREATING IT LIKE IT IS ONE. DON’T SAY IT IF THE RECEIVING PARTY ISN’T COMFORTABLE WITH IT, BUT ITS LIKE EVERY OTHER PLAY INSULT. STOP IT.

STOP TELLING FICTIVES OR PEOPLE THAT HAVE GENUINE DELUSIONS THAT THEY ARE JUST KIN, OR ARE LESS VALID THAN YOU. THAT IS GENUINELY ABLEIST JUST FUCKING STOP.

IF YOU GENUINELY BELIEVE YOU CAN EVENTUALLY BE, OR ARE PHYSICALLY THE CHARACTER/ANIMAL, PLEASE SEEK MEDICAL HELP. THESE MAY BE SYMPTOMS OF CLINICAL LYCANTHROPY. ALTER-HUMAN/KIN COMMUNITIES CANNOT HELP YOU WITH THESE SYMPTOMS.

BEING KIN IS NOT ALWAYS SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS/TALKING ABOUT THE DOWNSIDES, AND DEBUNKING COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS:

Despite what new wave kins want you to believe, being kin isn’t always fun. For people that are genuinely kin, people will insult them, they’ll get horrendous kin mems, and no one will believe what they’re saying just because they’re kin. People spread misinformation constantly, saying that we believe we’re “trans-species,” and making us out to be like the “trans-racial” or “trans-disabled communities. This notion has been so popularized by anti-kin that it’s even made its way onto the official Wiktionary page, in which it states that kin believe they’re “trans-species.” This is not true, and was originally popularized here on tumblr by anti-kin/satire blogs trying to make us all look like transphobic idiots. However, some people genuinely do identify as trans-species, and should be treated as valid. They are not intending to mock transgender people, this is just how they identify. People who are kin do not believe that they are, or can be, the character/animal they identify as. People who do SHOULD NOT be classified as kin, as that is usually delusions. CALLING PEOPLE WITH DELUSIONS KIN IS ABLEIST, AND BUILDS MORE OF A STIGMA AROUND PEOPLE WITH DELUSIONS. Insults can include calling us annoying or stupid, “kinnies,” comparing us to people with genuine delusions (which is more spreading disinformation and insulting to people with delusions,) saying that we’re lying or invalid because they don’t personally hold the belief, etc. Anti-kin like to generalize as well, and lump in harmless kin that just want to have fun with factkin, people who steal DID terms, and people who harass others over kin drama. Kin just want to be let be, and be allowed to have fun in peace. STOP DERAILING POSITIVITY POSTS JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK ITS STUPID, OR YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN IT. THE POST ISN’T WELCOMING DISCOURSE, AND YOU’RE JUST BEING AN ASSHOLE. On to kin mems, these can be awful and extremely hard to deal with. People who are kin from Danganronpa could get mems of their own executions or murders, people who are otherkin could get kin mems of being hunted or poached, and people who are kin from DDLC could get kin mems of their suicides. Whether you think they’re fake or not, these people are genuinely feeling like they are reliving their own death. Please, just stop making fun of peoples kin mems when they’re doing nothing wrong.

Some pages I used as refrence, which are just general good resources: Toko.Mango on Instagram, the otherkin fandom wiki, miviele.kins on Instagram, and some personal experience as well as experiences from fictionkin friends.

PLEASE feel free to add on to this post! This is just a starter guide, intended to give a base to start from when finding out about kin communities!

Edit: Some corrections have been made to the ID section, to “trans-species,” and the psychological kin section. If you have any other corrections for me to make, let me know!

Edit: this post was really uneducated pretend i said stuff that made sense <3<3

[aroyami]

everyone acts like the otherkin thing was mostly furries in denial or white people who were told they couldn't have spirit animals, yknow, normal stuff, until the fictionkin komaedas or people being kin with popes. But my first encounter with otherkin was someone sending an ask like "My mom won't let me eat her jewelry even though im dragonkin :(" and the op responding like this was a normal, real concern and the asker's mom should be convinced to let their kid eat their jewelry

What the fuck kind of fake dragon kinnie thinks dragons EAT riches instead of just pointlessly sitting on them. I can’t believe this poser didn’t know their own lore. Smh

[aestherians]

My response to this video is gonna be ridiculously long, so hit J if you want to skip it

“Fictinkin is Terrible” Bad grammar. Should either be ‘fictionkin are terrible’ or 'fictionkinity is terrible’. But I digress.

“I actually used to be fictionkin” It’s generally agreed that if you’re 'kin, that’s what you are. It’s an inherent trait, like a hair color, and you can’t just quit it (though you can realize you never were 'kin in the first place or you can stop associating with the community or you can refuse to use any of the labels). A better wording would probably be “I used to think I was fictionkin.” This is just nitpicking, honestly, as it doesn’t change the experiences you’ve had with the community.

“[The otherkin community consists] of people who believe they are the spirit of a species besides human, born into the wrong body.” Not exactly wrong, not exactly right. This describes a lot of otherkin but by far not all. I believe my soul is partially that of a bison but I don’t believe I should’ve been born in the body of a bison. I also feel like I’m a gnoll (you know,, those fuckers from D&D) on a psychological level, which I chalk up to a lot of weird things in my late childhood/early teens, such as roleplaying werewolves and imprinting on the art of DarkNatasha. It’s not play-pretend, it’s just a… character trait, I guess you could say. Like being Pagan or being really into knitting. A large portion of otherkin believe it’s a purely psychological phenomenon or that the cause is a mix of spiritual and psychological stuff. Likewise, a lot of otherkin don’t feel like they’re born into the wrong body. It’s very subjective how each individual describes their otherkinity.

“It’s origins are mainly from tumblr” Not really… The current otherkin community has its roots in the elven communities from the 1970s (namely the Elf Queen’s Daughters and the Silver Elves). The EQD have letters dating back to 1973 detailing their nonhuman identities and can trace the origins of their organization back to the late 1960s. The word 'otherkin’ was coined by Torin in a mailing list (hosted by R’ykandar Korra’ti) in 1990. This is around the same time that the therian community appeared (seperately from the elvenkind/otherkin community) in the newsgroup Alt.Horror.WereWolves. For more information, check out “Otherkin Timeline - The Recent History of Elfin, Fae,and Animal People” By O. Scribner.

“Nowadays, the otherkin community has actually been pretty dead recently…” Again, not really… If anything, there are more otherkin actively discussing their identities and connecting with each other now than ever before. The community is just isolated to private chats and servers (mainly on Discord) and heavily moderated forums like WereList, Therian-Guide, and Fictionkin Dot Com.

“…and in its place has arisen something far worse: This is the fictionkin community.” Though some of the elves of the EQD and the Silver Elves would technically be classified as fictionkin today (as they identified as canon characters from Tolkien’s Middle-earth), the fictionkin community as we know it dates back to circa 2001. In other words, it’s not a replacement for the otherkin community specific to tumblr, and it is probably older than a lot of the people watching this video. For more info, check out “A History Of The Fictionkin Community” by House of Chimeras.

“Otherkin actually has [sic] some basis in spiritual beliefs like reincarnation and spirit animals” Otherkinity has nothing to do with having a spirit animal and an otherkin have nothing to do with spirit animals. If someone isn’t first nations they shouldn’t even touch that term. I understand where the confusion comes from, though. When you’re just getting to know your animal guide/spirit guide you think about them a lot, and when you think about something a lot you’re bound to experience things that are reminiscent of otherkin experiences, such as dreaming that you are the animal or taking on the mindset of the animal. The author Lupa used to think she was a wolf therian but a couple of years down the line recognized that she’d mistaken her spirit guide for a theriotype. You can read about it in her article “Letting Go of Therianthropy For Good.”

“Fictionkin, however, these people lack any actual reasoning behind why they think they’re a fictional character. They’ll often run around in circles, trying to come up with explanations for it, usually quoting the multiverse theory.” Archetypal connection, dissociation, energetic resonance, imprinting, mental fabrication, psychic connection, differently shaped soul parts, soul shattering, spiritual links, trauma, a coping mechanism turned into an involuntary identity, astral shapeshifting, neurodivergence, developmental issues in one of the critical periods of identity formation… Need I go on? There are plenty of things (both spiritual and psychological) that could explain why some people are fictionkin.

“At least the otherkin community tries to explain their logic with actual spiritual and religious beliefs.” What’s the difference between an “actual spiritual belief” and what fictionkin believe in? Hopefully you’re aware that all religious and spiritual beliefs were created by people. Superheroes are the modern day Greek gods, and fictionkinity isn’t really different from Alexander the Great believing he was a demigod. At least I don’t see the difference, except in the number of people that believe it (and I think we can all agree that the number of subscribers a belief has does not determine how real it is, otherwise we’d all have to accept the Abrahamic god as real and atheists would be seen as delusional).

“But the fictionkin community preaches a theory with no actual evidence behind it like it’s fucking fact.” And what exactly is the evidence behind non-fictionkin beliefs about the cause of 'kinity…?

“How do you actually determine that you are these characters?” I’m not fictionkin, so I can’t speak for them, but I identify as a bison and a gnoll because I experience a lot of things that fit into either narrative more comfortably than it does a human narrative. Body dysphoria, homesickness after places I’ve never been, impulses/urges, supernumerary phantom limbs, periods where my mindset feels less human and more animal, and flashing images of being my kintypes. Am I literally a nonhuman creature in a human body? Who the fuck knows. But it feels good to me to put those experiences in that narrative.

“It’s really concerning that these people would base their entire identities around something so vague.” Assuming someone’s kintype is their entire identity because you only know them from their 'kin blog is like assuming Drea Renee’s entire identity is 'knitter’ because she runs a big knitting blog. It doesn’t really fly. I’m otherkin, sure, but I’m also an animal science student, an aspiring amateur entomologist, a collector of old books, a fantasy fan, a cat lover, a scourer of thrift stores, and I could go on. Old books isn’t my entire identity. Insects aren’t my entire identity. Otherkinity isn’t my entire identity. I understand the assumption as you only see most 'kin on their blog devoted to otherkinity, but trust me, they will 9 times out of 10 have a private main blog where they post about all the other stuff that interests them.

“Let’s assume these memories are real. Don’t you think it would be possible to have memories of a character you aren’t even familiar with?” Plenty of people do, actually! They usually only find out when their source comes out, though. A somewhat famous example is Ebony who identified as a thestral a few years before Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was released. You can read about this in their essay “Fangs, Flesh and Flight” on House of Chimeras’ Livejournal. I myself have had several 'memories’ (I’m reluctant to call them that for personal reasons) of being an elderly woman in various situations. I’ve looked everywhere for something that matches those images, but I’ve pretty much resigned myself to it just being a 'normal’ past life.

“They pretty much make their self-indulgent canon” As a canon-divergent gnoll, I am Offended™. Nah, but honestly, canons and people’s relationships with them are weird (and I have a gut feeling that non-'kin would call our experiences fake whether we adhere to canon or not). Some people swear up and down that Shiro from Voltron still loves his ex, others claim the opposite. And neither of them are wrong since it’s all about the media consumer’s own perception of what they’re shown. Then there are people like me who just go off whatever gut feeling they have, so whatever kind of gnoll I identify as doesn’t show up in any tabletop canon that I’m aware of. I technically identified as a gnoll before I knew what a gnoll was and on my blog there are plenty of posts where I list my traits, asking if someone knows a creature matching them. In the end a kind Anon pointed me towards gnolls.

“According to these people you don’t even have to have memories to be kin. Actually, there’s no real determining factors for how to be kin and nothing is stopping you from being kin with every single fictional character that you like. As a matter of fact, people who are only kin with one or two characters are the minority.” You don’t need memories to be 'kin as there are many other factors that could cause you to feel nonhuman/like a fictional character. I’ve already gone over this in “How do you actually determine that you are these characters?”. What stops you from having a billion characters as your kintype at once is the simple fact that only a smaller number can really be significant enough parts of your personality to constitute kintypes. There’s no set upper limit, but somwhere around 5 is usually where you should start to get really skeptical. The people who have a list of 100 supposed kintypes have just really misunderstood what other-/fictionkinity is and need to be gently corrected. I hate to sound like I’m yelling ‘no true scotsman’ but among genuine otherkin, you’ll rarely find someone with more than 10 kintypes. Past lives, sure, but not kintypes.

“…delusions of being fictional characters.” 'Kinity is not a delusion. Please don’t downplay mental health issues by comparing them to a subculture. The DSM-IV classifies a delusion as “A false belief based on incorrect inference about external reality that is firmly sustained despite what almost everyone else believes and despite what constitutes incontrovertible and obvious proof or evidence to the contrary. The belief is not one ordinarily accepted by other members of the person’s culture or subculture (e.g., it is not an article of religious faith). When a false belief involves a value judgment, it is regarded as a delusion only when the judgment is so extreme as to defy credibility.” Otherkinity is an identity, not a belief, and it is in identity that makes no claims about the external world (with the exception of a select few elves and fae in the 80s/90s who claimed to be genetically otherkin). The beliefs surrounding otherkinity, however, can be delusional in rare cases like physical shifting. But in almost all cases the beliefs would fall into the culture/subculture category like religions do.

"And as they always say, anyone can become kin! You don’t even need to take it seriously.” The people who say that are going against the +40 years of established knowledge about the community and the otherkin experience. They’re wrong. You can not 'become 'kin’, only realize you were 'kin your whole life. You can, however, choose to become a copinglinker, which I believe a lot of the kids on tumblr actually are. If you chose your kintype, if you can drop a kintype all willy-nilly, or if you’re “kin to cope,” you’re a copinglinker, not otherkin. It’s a matter of misinformation and a lack of resources (and of kids refusing to listen when more knowledgeable people correct them).

“Eventually you’re gonna have to grow out of this.” Why? I’m happy the way I am (and functional, if that’s what you’re worried about). I’ve got friends, hobbies, and goals. I recently quit my job to focus on my studies, but up until then, I had no problems keeping it. I go to college. I go to parties. I’m going to Pride in a few hours. I’m not exactly secret about being otherkin, and all the people who’ve found out or who’ve been told that I am, have just shrugged and accepted it. If it doesn’t interfere with my day-to-day, there’s no reason to 'outgrow it’. For the record, I know plenty of people in their 30s and 40s (even a few upwards of 70) who lead completely normal lives and happen to be other-/fictionkin.

[kincringeemporium]

My time in the otherkin community and how it harmed me

I’m submitting this to existing blogs instead of posting it on my own- I don’t want to be attacked, and I’m honestly scared of losing followers if I say this. With that being said, here we go. -KR

I’d like to share my experience in the otherkin community and how it has harmed me.

I used to identify as a red fox therian, dragonkin, and fictionkin of three characters, namely Peridot from SU. I identified with even more fictotypes at on each point, but luckily I was able to drop them. I had a blog that was pretty popular and respected at one point but I took it down. 

Early in fall 2015, my depression was worsening and I felt like a void. I felt empty as I was losing connection to myself because of developing anhedonia. I came across otherkin on YouTube at one point, and I related to their experiences of wanting to be part of the wild, walk in family-like groups, and play the role of animals I closely connected to. Heck, I still like the thought of that whole concept. Eventually I came across the Tumblr side of things, and everything basically became a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

I started looking for “memories” via meditation, and because I expected to see them, alas, I found “memories.” 

I felt extremely connected to foxes and Peridot (I still do, but obviously no longer in a kin way) so those were my “main kintypes.” 

It was ignorant bliss for a while, using the kin identity as a comfort/coping mechanism, but slowly I had lots of self-doubt over my newfound kin identity, and I pushed it all away, ignored it, because I wanted so desperately to be my favorite characters and fill the void my depression had been leaving me. 

Repressing my doubt would only hurt me. I had a identity crisis over something that wasn’t even a real part of me. 

Trust me though, many parts of this whole phase felt very real though. I had “phantom shifts” (a result of my vivid imagination), “"physical dysphoria” (which I think is worth mentioning only happened once), and even "memories.” 

Let me tell you about those memories, by the way. There were vivid and spontaneous as hell, and I swear to you they felt very real. I felt some Deja vu  too and they were very well triggered by events that “reminded” me of said memory. Walking through the halls of the a gem spaceship as I handed some homework to my teacher, licking my lips at some very juicy looking blue berries when the smell of perfume smelled familiar to me, etc. I never had them before I started identifying as kin. And you know what? I never hadn’t thema gain after I dropped the kin label, either. As real as it feels, some things are just fabrications- you don’t need to be doing it consciously for it to be all in your head. 

I also took the smallest parts about me and used them as explanations for being kin, as traits brought over from past lives. I thought my affinity for the forest and eating meat was part of being foxkin, although they are very normal things humans can feel. Also because I share a lot of quirks with Peridot, I thought they were traits from lives before. When really, they were just normal things that I developed in this life- such as scratching my forehead where her gem would’ve been. I did this isnce I was a child, but it was actually one of my coping mechanisms for my anxiety, not because something felt missing on my forehead. 

Other excuses I used to “prove” my kin identity:

A strong pull to the forest (which is honestly pretty normal), liking to eat meat,  being able to predict what would happen in a certain series (most of the time, these are coincidences), my fear of fire and the dark (again, very normal), wanting to fly, relating to characters and feeling strongly connected to them, wanting to be a part of the fictional series I liked (honestly, who doesn’t want to be a part of their favorite movie, show or book?)

I would also make up things and overexaggerate certain memories or feelings in order to make myself feel more “valid.” When watching or reading “my canon” I forced myself to give myself anxiety during scenes my kintypes would be stressed in, and felt horrible over nothing. 

My time in the otherkin community started in September 2015. I got so deep into it that I couldn’t pull myself out until late spring of 2016, where I forced myself to give it up. I was legitimately very upset, as I was very attached to my delusion and surrounded my identity around it- like I said, I felt like a void. I barely had one at the time. 

I eventually started calling myself otherhearted instead. Otherhearted is just a way to say you feel very connected to a character and still feel special about it. I ditched that eventually, too, and just started collecting “comfort characters”- which, honestly, is more healthy than identifying as kin, hearted, or even copinglink will ever be. 

I’m honestly very proud of being able to get rid of this before it got worse. Unfortunately, it left some lasting effects.

Because of the whole kin phase, I lost trust in myself and started doubting myself on parts of my identity I knew were 100% true, but I couldn’t believe myself on what was logically and emotionally true just because I was wrong that ONE time. My anxiety increased in general, honestly. I think it’s safe to say that if I was never otherkin, my anxiety wouldn’t have made a comeback like this.

Before older and more experienced therein get mad at me and shout “just because you were delusional, it doesn’t mean all of us are” I’m not saying that all kin are delusional or fake, but I’m saying that VERY lightly. Maybe your memories are real and you really are a wacky dragon, elf, and Lapis Lazuli thing,  I don’t know.

But what I want people to get from this is: identifying as kin, using it as a coping mechanism, etc CAN be harmful, and is most likely a phase. If you identify as kin, I just want to look over your reasons for being kin and see if they are caused by something else, or coincidence. Did you have ‘traits’ of being kin before or after you started identifying as it? How did you start being kin- were you using it as a coping mechanism initially, had a desire to be your favorite animal or character, or feel special? Be honest with yourself. Honesty is the key factor to finding out if you are really kin. Instead of looking for things that might validate your kintypes, look for things that disprove it. 

Trust me, you could really help yourself in the long run.

-KR

[the-long-lost-ebony-blog]

my suicide attempt from kinphobia -- really really long post!!

TW FOR SUICIDE, SUICIDE ATTEMPT, HOSPITAL, FRIEND BETRAYAL, DOCTORS, ABUSE, KINPHOBIA, ANXIETY, SELF HARM , PEDOPHILE MENTION, and MAYBE DOXXING!!! 

well um. remember a while back when i was all super worried about a girl in chem class almost finding out i'm kin? yeah. it happened. it happened like a month ago. so i actually started being friends with her after she'd obvs had a bad day, like she was just sitting in the hall and i felt sorry for her bc she'd been crying. i started talking to her and asked if she was okay, now at that point she had no idea that i might be kin. i hid it really well! until!! she said that kin itself is a mental illness. and i couldn't help myself. i fuckin went off on her. kin isn't a mental illness, not all kin are mentally ill, etc etc. she just froze up and had this look of absolute disgust on her face. i tried to backpedal and say that she was just using the words wrong, and she was insulting mentally ill ppl but noo, she caught on. 

i just sorta made an excuse and left but it turns out that later on, she'd gone onto my facebook which i don't put on here for reasons like this lol. she dug through my timeline and a bunc of old photos and found like... a kin positive graphic from 2009 or something. it was a thing saying that i was "kin and proud" or whatever. (back then i thought i might be therian or otherkin. not fictionkin.)) 

now, i am in college but for summers i go home to live with my parents. that's where i am now. so here's where it gets worse. tw for stuff above. she went onto their facebook pages and got their emails. and she sent them both email as "a concerned friend". she told them that she was friends with me from class, and that i'd been acting weird lately -- like, not myself, low self esteem, spent all my time talking to strange people on tumblr, took 'a certain satire writing' (my source!! ugh) too seriously, and was really disconnected from reality. 

okay so the deal with my parents: they really are supportive of gender stuff (even though i'm a cis girl and was cis in canon) and different sexualities, and disabilities. they are also anti trump and want free health care and wish we did not start shit with russia. like they are not bad people. but in the past , i'd started to ask them for advice on if i was kin.  i had to explain what kin was. and they were p much horrified that this exists. they think that it "locks people into fiction and imagined reality" and "stunts their phsyclogical (not sure how to spell) development" and "teaches suffering kids to use escapism instead of therapy or self help". basically they are super ableist when it comes to kin. and they think it's ridiculous that it's actual community. stupid me, i'd literally said (before they said all that) that "i think i'm an otherkin, i feel uncomfortable as i am right now". so i pretended to agree with them on kin being bad. but then when this girl sent them the email.... i was home. with them. 

they would not shut up aboout how terrible this was for me, how i was hurting myself, how they never should have let me on tumblr, how they shouldve watched me closer, how i don't owe "these people" anything (you guys are my friends!!!) how this community is toxic, how i badly needed therapy. okay okay -- i need therapy! but it's for depression! not for being ebony!! and it was like this every single fucking day, and a lot of cringe blogs have been posting shots of my blog. that's because she's sent anon tips to them outing me as kin, outed me to my parents, and all the other ppl from class i was friends with? she spred a rumor that i was a pedophile apologist and didn't think authors' work was original, to make them stay away from me. i would have been here on tumblr -- ut they monitored all the stuff i did on the internet. i could only write poetry and watch youtube and like check the fucking weather. and i could shop on amazon. they became so ridiculously strict. it was "to protect me" but no. they refused to udnerstand that kin heps me! 

everything came to a head that night. they took a way my laptop, they took away my phone, they made me disconnect from everything that was related to kin. and they sent me to a therapist who was... well. awful. she was blatantly kinphobic, she'd had kin patients before and claimed to have cured them of being kin. this bitch had glowing reviews everywhere. when i insisted that i actually was ebony, she told me that i was taking "imagination as a coping skill" to far. she would not let me explain anything. my parents, who i usually came to for advice and liked, didn't let me explain. any mention of kin was just shut down. 

and then i couldn't anymore. i am so sorry, i just couldn't do it. and i was so angry at them. i was angryer at the bitch classmate who outed me to them. i wrote a sucide note telling them that i'd attempted before but kin saved my life, that i was sorry i couldn't be better, that all i ever wanted was to find my true self, that if i couldn't be ebony then i couldnt be at all. TW!! when they were asleep i went down to the medicine cabinet, i put a basket of my favorite things on the table, and i put the letter in it. and then i took.... jeez i dont even know what. 

the next thing i knew i was awake in the hospital. god it hurt all over. i just remember feeling super sick but really wanting food, and my head hurt, and it hurt to keep my eyes open. i was just... aching. and i was so disappointed and so scared that i'd failed. i knew my parents were furious with me and i'd never talk to my friends again. when they came in to finally talk to me , well i don't remember what happened. i blocked it out. but i do remember that they weren't angry at me, they were mad at themselves.  they are still kinphobic, but they want me to be comfortable with myself without "having to believe i'm ebony". 

when i recovered enough to be sent home they spent all their time with me until i said i needed to be alone. so they gave me a break but they came back, they said that they'd read about how to help me. all the advice they got said that they shouldn't isolate me and they shouldnt cut off my contact from my friends. so i'm allowed to be on tumblr a little, i'm allowed to talk about kin a little, they think that i'll grow out of it with lots of help. shutting me down about it will make me restless and i might atempt again. 

i am currently in therapy. i dk what my new therapist thinks of kin. i try not to talk about it with her bc i'm scared that she'll be hostile and i'll relapse. overall going to see her is not stressfull as long as i don't alk about being ebony. i just kinda pretend that i don't have a sense of my own identity, so she's trying to help me build one. i did tell her about how i had a frend that spread horrible rumors about me and shared my secrets bc i did something she didn't like, i didn't do anything wrong though. she was really sympathetic bc when she was a teenager, fake friends spread rumors about her being bi and said it meant she was cheating on her boyfriend. so yeah she is helping but kin helps too. i'm not going to tell her about it bc i can't have it taken away from me again. 

thats why i've been gone so long. i'm on new meds too, antidepressants, so i might act weird or be emotional a lot. and im trying not to self harm but i slip up and cut sometimes where no one can see it. 

i know i have a lot of messages. guys im really really sorry but i have to delete them. there are self care request, have to delete, i'm sorry. it's just.... if i the messages, i feel sick bc it' like i missed a deadline over and over and i feel like people are going to be mad at me and i feel like i cant fix it. if you sent requests, please sent them again SLOWLY over the next couple days. im doing everything i can to get better. but i need your help. 

[arcadienne]

fictionkin askbox game: all of them?

Thanks anon!

1. Who of your kin is most likely to stick out their tongue while focusing/working hard?Elizabeth, pfff.

2. Which kin to you identify most with?Uhhhh... shit. I’d say Chloe but I’m still not sure I’m a kin of her, and also I relate a lot to Liz too anyways.

3. Who was your first kin? Elizabeth.

4. What is your favorite memory?A memory that isn’t directly mine, but given to me, of my father singing to me when I was a baby.

5. What is your least favorite memory?lmao. Being completely alone and terrified and then facing death without even knowing why I chose this all anyways.

6. Which sense most connects you to your kin?Touch. 

7. How many kin do you have? (Fiction only)One for sure, possibly another? dk, not gonna stress about it too much rn.

8. Is there a kin you’re embarrassed about?No? I mean I’m scared about talking about kin outside of online communities, and even then I don’t have my main connected to this blog, but aside from judgement about being kin, no.

9. Who is your most obscure kin?None?

10. Is it hard for you to find canonmates?Canonmates? Uh, not really looking. More interested in building soulbonds of canonmates than finding them. But sourcemates? Nope. I know a ton and I love them all, us meme-loving fucks. asudhoias

11. Are you okay with doubles?Yep! So long as they’re not unkind or one of those ‘doubles are fake’ people, because that’s just nasty and upsetting.

12. Who of your kin is most likely to cause mayhem or panic? If I’m kin with her, Chloe. lmao

13. Which of your kin has the worst sense of fashion?Pff, neither.

14. Who from your canon do you miss most? Booker, then Songbird, then Little Sistersand then mostly just Max for Chlo

15. What was your favorite canon?Not sure I’d call anything ‘favourite’ since a lot of it was shit and I haven’t recalled many happy memories.

16. Which canon do you have the most memories from?Elizabeth.

17. Which canon do you have the fewest memories from?Chloe, but again I haven’t tried doing all the soul-searching stuff to see if I’m kin w her yet anyways.

18. Do any colors remind you of certain kin?Blue, for both. Red and black and silver and gold for Liz. Purple for both.

19. Do you have kin from the same source and canon?Nahp.

20. Do you have kin from the same source but different canons?Nope. I mean tbf all of us Elizabeths (and in source there are millions of us anyways lmao) were kind of connected in a way, and I know many remember various Liz timelines, so it wouldn’t surprise me if I had flashes from others, but personally I think I just have one ‘canon’.

21. Who of your kin is the biggest meme?...Chloe?

22. Who of your kin is the mom/dad friend?Mom: LizDad: Chlo

23. Does any non-kin know that you’re kin?Uh, not many. Potentially one person who may possibly maybe be kin themselves so lmao. 

24. Is there anything you could do in a past life that you wish you could still do?Open tears??? Any day, pls, let me be free and explore and be everywhere and visit my loved ones and have adventure oeifjawpaopwdoa it’s all I want lmao kill me

25. Do you have any kin that aren’t from media? (Otherkin)Well, I have experiences that technically could be classified as otherkin but I believe it’s more that my soul is tied rather closely with a spirit that takes the form of/is actually of an animal, and we feel each other’s emotions and such sometimes. Not a soulbond.... just, something else. Hard to explain. But I could technically fall under the otherkin experience if I didn’t believe them to be separate from myself, yet still tied. idk man lmaooo

[the-long-lost-ebony-blog]

on being accused of trolling: a personal rant

Idk I've been holding off on this for a while... gotta keep up the positivity on both blogs you know? i've told myself that i'm past being bothered by hate and past caring what actual trolls think of me. but I just can't keep this to myself any longer. what rly made me okay with putting this out there is the realization that it could help others!! this is @ everybody sending me hate, @ kin haters in general, and for kin who are having the same problem.

blah I can't bold or italicize stuff on here. so if you see caps it's just for emphasis. anyway... 

Jfc, people. I am sick and fucking tired of having to put disclaimers on every single ask i send to request blogs: "i'm not a troll! i promise!" i shouldn't have to do that. i should just be able to nicely ask for an aesthetic or whatever, and get one. i should be able to submit to fictionkin blogs and kin feels/relatable bogs without my messages being ignored "because i'm a troll". 

llike if I was something more "normal" - idk, catkin - I'd still get the generic "otherkin isn't real! you need a therapist" hate from anti-kin. that's the sort of thing that I just kinda laugh at, bc it's pretty baseless and unintelligent. but as Ebony, I get the "Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way?? srsly?? you must be joking!! My Immortal is trash!!!!!" hate... from fellow kin. WTF guys??

and btw, it's Ebony Dark'ness Demonica. DEMONICA. Not Dementia, that's horrible and its offensive. 

so I go to a great college that's rly accepting and diverse and there are quite a few kin here. i met a super cute and nice Rose LaLonde the other day -- at least, i thought she was cute and nice. I noticed she had some kin stuff, like stickers and "support otherkin" buttons and so i introduced myself as Ebony. 

her: Aww you're kin too?? Nice! so what are your kintypes? 

me: Well, i am EbonyDark'ness! please use Demonica in place of Dementia. 

her: ..uhhh, My Immortal? (she has kind of a weird look on her face liek she's uncomfortable with me)

me Yeah... (still trying to smile) I'm not trolling don't worry.

her: i'm pretty sure you are.... bye.... (and she leaves, haven't seen her since) 

Ugh!! just... even Irl, where it's really rare to actually introduce yourself in person to another kin, i just can't seem to catch a break. seriously, what the hell? this is not fair. this just just... smh. It hurts, okay? it hurts knowing that about 60% of ppl I talk to, on Tumblr and off, think I'm faking being kin with Ebony. I'm sure a lot of you have the same problem... 

anyway guys, sorry for all the negativity, but the trolls are starting to get to me.