btw I’ve mentioned this on here before but I had a really shitty ex boyfriend. while I was in the relationship, I would write poems about him being my lifeline, the thing that kept me floating, he brought color to my world and I would praise him for giving me the tiniest of kindnesses. But there was a lot of red flags and bad shit he did to me and things he put me through, that honestly I couldn’t admit and realize until I went to therapy. A lot of those poems have been changed in my head, the meaning of them changed, and I even wrote poems changing the meaning of the earlier poems. The good was good. The bad was worse. I know that now. I’m older now. It’s brighter now.
If I can do that for myself on a private level, why can’t Taylor do it publicly? Why can’t she do this for herself? She wrote him into her world, let her write him out if she needs too. She’s older now. Let her do the same.
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DO NOT BE AFRAID
this is combining Ovid's Heroides and the Excidium Troie because I can't stop thinking of Hermes telling him not to be afraid. what the fuck!! Ares is wearing the crown that Paris gave him.
I have. thoughts. about Paris. he's almost got this Troilos parallel in my mind, that the event that defines him in detail exists in a lost narrative that we don't have (the Cypria), but everyone else knew. the event that defines Troilos is his death (murdered, butchered by Achilles, the violence of which haunts everything after. Achilles, child killer, you can't escape that!), and the event that defines Paris is the Judgement. what's a lost text but a kind of grave!!
idk I don't think that Paris before the Judgement would recognize himself after bc when you become god touched, it rearranges your guts. you become transformed in the worst way possible! how could you recognize yourself! but I also think that all the Parises after the Judgement would recognize each other because that event is so locked into the trauma of war and the scar it leaves on the land, it's like a scar on the narrative too. it exists like this forever, over and over again, so you exist like that forever too. Troy collects grief and despairs.
Troy as trauma: Reflections on intergenerational transmission and the locus of trauma, Andromache Karanika
and Paris is like. a miserable little god/corpse-puppet or something, like a match for the gods to throw onto gasoline.
The Excidium Troie + Ovid's Heroides:
Excidium Troie, trans. Muhammad Syarif Fadhlurrahman
Ovid, Heroides 16 (trans. Harold Isbell)
a collection of things regarding Paris that made me go 😬 but under a cut bc this is getting. very long.
The Divine Twins in Early Greek Poetry, Corolla Torontonensis
Iliad 24 and the Judgement of Paris, C.J. Mackie
Elegy and Epic and the Recognition of Paris: Ovid "Heroides" 16, Elizabeth Forbis Mazurek
Ennian Influence in "Heroides" 16 and 17, Howard Jacobson
Paris/Alexandros in the "Iliad", I. J. F. de Jong
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I posted it on my twit but I’ll post it here too. More Winter King and Simon antics
Credit to @Lasunpure on twit for the meme template .
My main twit (SFW): @CoeurDeLuciole
Side (NSFW) twit: @CoeurToiles
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Me: Oh hey, I actually really like this thing!
Autism: YEAH THIS IS BRILLIANT I'M GONNA MAKE IT EVERYTHING WE CARE ABOUT FOR LIKE A MONTH
Me: Sounds good! A new hyperfixation will mix things up a bit! Plus the main character is complicated enough to expand upon--
Autism: NO
Me: ?
Autism: NO MAIN CHARACTER
Me: But--
Autism: OUR FAVOURITE IS THIS CREATURE THAT'S ON SCREEN FOR LIKE 5 MINUTES THAT ONE IS PERFECT
Me: But they have no fan content
Autism:
Me:
Autism:
Me: ... I'll make my own--
Autism: DAMN RIGHT YOU'LL MAKE YOUR OWN
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"you are the only one who's ever broken me open."
"do not scream god's name, scream mine."
"please don't make me say it if you aren't going to say it back."
"your heart is beating so fast." "because i'm happy."
"i want to draw a map of your scars so i can always find my way back to your heart."
"i don't believe in such nonsense." "i'm not asking you to. i'm simply asking that you believe in me."
"is that good? that's all i want, to make you feel good."
"it reminded me of you. but then, sometimes i think everything reminds me of you."
"what a fragile thing, that love can so easily turn to violence."
"why are you doing this?" "because i love you."
"it didn’t feel right when I was always thinking of you."
"i would have felt like the luckiest person on the planet."
"are you gonna take that off or should i keep guessing?"
"i wanted this to be special."
"i can't believe... after all this time... i should have known it would be you."
"i want to be wildly, deliriously happy. wildly, deliriously loved."
"i try always to be too much for you."
"the sooner i leave, the sooner i will return and we can begin again."
"i didn't die." "you were dead to me."
"i don't care if other people see us together, you do."
"and you say i'm the one who should be resting."
"i'm sorry." "for what?" "that you got stuck with me."
"what makes you happy?" "lots of things." "and what makes you unhappy?" "lots of other things and some of the same ones."
"i wish i could give you the world." "the world is not enough. but you are."
"i have never needed anything so much as i need you. and i hate you for it."
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I could've had a normal, more socially acceptable interest but my brain decided in 2020 that Obey Me was what it was going to flash before my eyes as a core memory when I die and it's been locked in ever since. I'm afraid that six of my last seven minutes of brain activity will be Obey Me.
Loading screen with the music. Losing to a SSR that I've already got maxed out. Surprise guests. Dance battles and missing the very last hit to get a combo on Nightbringer. The joy of a Solomon demon voucher sale and the horror of opening up fab snap for the first time.
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Why ship canon x canon when you can just ship yourself with canon character?
It's 2023 get over yourself. Self ship. You self ship with that character rn!
Make an oc. Make a self insert. Make yourself love that blorbo. Ffs!
Fuck what people think. Stop being a bitch and do it! You go fucking love that character!!!
I am being aggressively self ship positive.
If anyone gives you flack for self shipping. I will find them and throw hands!
Like srsly cringe culture is dead. It's time to be clown!
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Are we at a point in society where we’re ready to talk about how Eddie and Venom are both absolutely autistic and the movies double as a metaphor for nurodivergance as well as queerness and that we really don’t talk about it enough and also I need more fanfic of them being autistic?
Edit: I have now made and posted that in depth post about this if anyone is interested
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