#hero needs a hug

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

When Sun Shines Again Chapter 4: "To Lead A Better Life:" Part 3

⛅CHAPTER 4⛅ "To Lead A Better Life" Part 3

Chapter Description: When Hero visits Basil one last time before returning to college for the fall semester, Basil gives him a letter that forces him to confront bittersweet memories, painful truths, and the complicated feelings that Hero had tried so hard to bury.

This Chapter is Hero & Basil's Friendship-Centric.

Chapter Word Count: 6700. Link to Chapter 4 on AO3.

Description (for the entire work): When tragedy struck, Hero lost not only his dearest friend but also his dreams for the future. Even years later, Hero doesn't know what his "forever" looks like without Mari in it, but somehow he finds the strength to carry on and build a new life for himself. With his family and friends both old and new by his side, Hero struggles through life's ups and downs--the joys and sorrows he faces in a world without Mari. In the beginning, he's only looking to survive it all, but somewhere along the way, he might find a purpose, a reason he's still here. Maybe there really is a way he can learn to be happy again, and maybe, just maybe, when he's least expecting it, he might even find himself slowly opening his heart to love again--he might even find himself believing that even the darkest, stormiest of times will eventually pass and the sun will shine again.

A Hero-Centric story spanning 15 years of his life post-good end. Focuses on Hero finding healing & building a life for himself after the loss of Mari. Eventually includes him learning to love again after an extremely slow burn. All pairings are tagged upfront. Rated T for heavy themes & some language. Reading the prequel is recommended.

⛅Tags For The Story As A Whole (So A Lot Of These Are "Eventual" Tags):

Romantic Relationships: Main Ships: (Past) Hero/Mari and (Eventual) Hero/OC. Side Ships: Brandi/OC and a brief mention of Mikhael/Bebe are the only side ships involving canon characters.

Platonic Relationships: Hero & Brandi Friendship, Hero & Original Characters Friendship. Some Hero & Kel Siblings Relationship & Brotherly Friendship. Hero & Aubrey Friendship. Hero & Basil Friendship. Hero & Sunny Friendship. Hero & His Family.

Characters: Major Canon Characters: Hero (POV Character), Brandi [Intimidating Girl], Mari and Mari's Memory, & Kel. Major Original Characters (Hero's college friends): Kyle, C.J., Zoey, Tamra, and Lorraine. Other Included Canon Characters: Sunny, Basil, Aubrey, Sally, Hero's Parents, Bebe (Short Haired Girl/Fountain Girl) & Mikhael (The Maverick).

Genre: Hero-Centric Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slice of Life, College Life, Lost Love, Finding Love Again, Finding Healing After Grief, Slow Burn, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Greiving, Catharsis, Heart-To-Heart Chats, Hopeful/Happy Ending, Post-Good Ending, Hero Needs A Hug, Hero Deserves To Be Happy

Rating: T for some heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some language.

Warnings: Major Spoilers for OMORI! Heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some Language.

Link to Entire work on AO3.

⛅ Link to the "When Sun Shines Again" Masterlist. ⛅

Full chapter text below the cut. Thank you for reading! ⛅

“Do you have any sevens?” asked Kel.

Twisting her mouth to one side, Aubrey frowned at her cards, but she shrugged her shoulders. “No. Go fish.”

Curiously, Hero glanced down at his own hand, then at a nearby clock on the wall. They had been playing Go Fish for nearly an hour, and Hero couldn’t for the life of him understand how no one had managed to win yet. Even thinking back on the many rounds of Go Fish he and his friends had played in their youth, he couldn’t remember a game that lasted more than half an hour, at the most, but it seemed that ever since they had started playing cards with Basil whenever they visited him in the hospital the games were growing longer and longer.

Hero wondered if that was on purpose—if his companions were somehow purposely dragging the games out so they would have something to do, something to keep Basil distracted so he wouldn’t start crying again. After all, their first couple of visits had mostly consisted of Basil weeping in tearful apologies, and Hero was certain he was not the only one who wanted to avoid that going forward.

Something ached in Hero’s chest whenever he thought of how emotional things had been in the beginning—how fragile Basil had been and that heartbreaking look on his face like he was always on the verge of tears. If Hero was being honest, it scared him, and though it made him feel overwhelmingly guilty to admit it, somehow he couldn’t help but wonder if that’s what his family had seen every time they had looked at him after Mari had died: a shaking, shivering shell of a person they had once known and loved. It was painful to watch, and as much as his heart ached seeing Basil suffer, he could only imagine that his family had suffered even more in watching Hero, himself, suffer in the same way. Knowing he had put his family through that… It was nearly enough to make Hero not want to get out of bed in the morning.

There was something surreal in being on this side of it all. Even having gone through a similar period of deep depression himself—even knowing firsthand how painful and hopeless that darkness and numbness could be, Hero felt completely helpless when it came to Basil and his suffering. He had no idea what to do—if there was even anything he could do to make Basil feel better. This feeling of helplessness coupled with the sickening, twisting feeling in his gut whenever Basil burst into tears at the mere sight of him had given Hero a new and incredibly painful appreciation for Kel and what his brother must have been through these last couple of years stuck on the periphery of his loved ones’ collapsing world. But maybe that was Kel’s strength. He could be so supportive and attentive to the needs of the other people around him, and he just had this way of knowing what might help someone, even someone at their lowest, feel better. It had been his idea to start playing cards to cheer up Basil, after all.

After a long and ongoing debate about whether or not the three of them should just stop visiting Basil altogether, Hero, Kel, and Aubrey had sat down with Polly to discuss whether or not their visits were actually helpful or were just hindering Basil’s recovery, which, Hero knew, was the last thing any of them wanted. When Polly had told them that she thought that it would be much more hurtful to Basil if his friends never came around, Kel had suggested that they try to think of activities to do when they visited so Basil would be too busy to think about being sad.

It turned out Kel was right. They soon found that their visits with Basil at the hospital went much more smoothly if they all did an activity together—sometimes a puzzle, other times arts and crafts. They quickly settled into playing board games or, more frequently, cards just like they used to when they were kids.

As time went on, Basil seemed much happier, especially when he was distracted. The color slowly returned to his face. He started tending some flowers in the hospital’s garden and even started taking some photos again. Most promising of all, the last time they had visited, Hero saw Basil laugh for the first time in possibly years at a silly joke Kel had told them about a pirate’s pet parrot of all things. It was good to see Basil beginning to heal and come back to his old self again. Still, they didn’t want to undo any progress so they kept playing infinite games of cards which, if Hero had to guess, they probably did drag out on purpose, at least on a subconscious level.

“Are you sure you don’t have any sevens?” asked Kel, pulling Hero out of his thoughts. His brow furrowed as he glanced over at Aubrey with narrowed eyes.

“No,” she huffed, growing more exasperated. “I don’t have any sevens, Kel.”

 “I—I have sevens,” sniffled Basil “You—you can have my sevens…”

“Sweet!” exclaimed Kel, reaching across the table to take Basil’s cards, but Hero gently stopped him with a pat on the arm.

“Kel, that’s not fair. You can ask Basil for sevens on your next turn.”

Basil sniffled again, pulling his sweater tightly around his shoulders. “It…It’s okay. I don’t mind. Kel can—”

“You’re ruining the game!” Aubrey interrupted with a huff. “It’s just Go Fish. There’s no reason to get so competitive about it!”

“Competitive?” Kel repeated so loudly that Basil practically jumped. “If anyone’s getting competitive, it’s you!”

As Kel and Aubrey began to bicker, Hero looked over at Basil with a certain concern in his eyes. Hero had always known that Basil was almost as conflict avoidant as him, and it was obvious from the way he cowered at Kel and Aubrey’s bickering—twisting his hands and biting his lip—that he would give just about anything for this fight to be over, including an entire hand full of sevens, if he’d had them. If Hero was being honest, he felt the same way.

“C-c’mon now,” Hero gently interrupted, trying to keep the peace “This is just supposed to be fun. We’re here to visit Basil and spend time with him. There’s no reason to start fighting.”

Kel and Aubrey stopped—each letting out a heavy sigh as they stared down at their hands of cards. “Hero’s right,” said Kel “Who cares about this stupid card game—we’re just happy to see you Basil. We can even do something else if you want.”

Basil’s eyes widened, but a smile twitched in the corners of his mouth. “I don’t care what we do—I’m just glad you’re here. It’s really good to see you guys.” Basil paused and sighed. “It gets…kind of lonely here sometimes.”

Something ached in Hero’s chest, and his expression softened. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for Basil all alone in the hospital far away from his family and friends. Even if he knew it was the best thing for him and was glad that he was getting the help that he needed, it made Hero sad to think that Basil was going through such a difficult time alone.

Hero sighed. He supposed Basil had been suffering alone for a very, very long time, and regardless of the complicated feelings that Hero himself may have been feeling towards Basil and everything that had happened, it was more important to him that Basil wouldn’t have to suffer by himself anymore—that he would never have to suffer by himself again.

He supposed Aubrey had eventually realized she felt this way too. It wasn’t long after their conversation about Basil and her complicated feelings towards him a couple of weeks ago that Aubrey had started visiting Basil again. She had never talked to Hero about it, but he could only assume that, like him, ultimately the love, friendship, and concern she had for Basil far outweighed her own hurts and feelings.

It meant a lot to Hero to see Aubrey offer Basil forgiveness, even when it was hard, and he knew how much it meant to Basil that she was there for him—that they were all there for him, even after everything that had happened. These days, it felt like the only person who hadn’t forgiven Basil was Basil himself, but Hero knew that would be the hardest part of all.

“Don’t worry, Basil,” Kel reassured him, patting his arm. “I’m sure you’ll get to come home really soon.”

Basil bit his lip but nodded as he quietly admitted, “I hope so…I uh…I’ve been really worried…about my flowers.”

“Oh you don’t have to worry about those. Hero has been taking care of them for you!” Kel beamed at Basil, giving him a pat on the back.

Basil’s eyes widened, but his hands began to tremble as he turned towards Hero. “Oh…you didn’t have to do that.”

“It’s no trouble at all,” Hero gently insisted with a slight smile. “Your house is on my way home from the pool, so I stop by on my way home from work. It barely takes any time at all, and it’s nice to have a hobby. Besides, Polly has been doing most of the work.”

“Aubrey and I have been helping out too,” added Kel. “But we’re not as good at gardening as you or Hero.”

Basil cleared his throat. “Well, thank you—all of you. I really appreciate it. I just…”  He paused, biting his lip and staring at his twisting hands. “I just…hope it’s not ruining your summer or taking up too much of your time.”

Aubrey, Kel and Hero quickly glanced at each other with somewhat awkward smiles—silently agreeing not to tell Basil that this had probably been one of the worst summers of their entire lives even without having to look after his garden for him. Hero had spent most of it working long hours at the community pool, cleaning his house, tending Basil’s garden, going for runs around the neighborhood, and desperately looking for anything else that would take his mind off of things. He craved being busy, but more than that he craved a distraction from his crumbling world. Sunny had moved. Basil was in the hospital. Kel and Aubrey were struggling. Everything in Hero’s life seemed to fall apart again this summer—collapsing under the weight of the truth. He could only imagine that Aubrey and Kel felt the same way. They couldn’t wait for this summer to finally be over…but they could never say that to Basil who stared up at them with frightened but hopeful eyes.

“How—how are you all doing?” Basil stumbled, in what Hero could only guess was a desperate attempt to fill the silence. “Is there…anything new and exciting in Faraway Town?”

Hero wracked his brain, but he couldn’t think of even one piece of good news to tell Basil. From the look on Aubrey’s face, it seemed she couldn’t think of one either. They both turned to Kel, who twisted his mouth to one side—his brow furrowing thoughtfully as if he, too, was scrounging to think of something positive to say.

“Uhhh… Hero got a postcard all the way from Venice, Italy.”

“Well…that’s pretty cool” said Basil with a slight smile.

Hero shrugged his shoulders. He supposed it was kind of sad that the most exciting thing that had happened all summer was that he had gotten a postcard from Italy, but his family, Kel especially, had been very fascinated by it. They had never gotten something in the mail from somewhere so far away before.

“It was really cool!” exclaimed Kel “It had a bridge on it.”

“Who was it from?” asked Basil.

“My friend from college, Kyle, sent it to me while his family was on vacation there,” said Hero. “It has the Bridge of Sighs on it. Kyle said he always buys postcards with bridges on them because one of his best friends is a civil engineering major and wants to build bridges someday. He gets her postcards of local bridges from all of his vacation destinations, but he had an extra one this time so he sent it to me.”

Basil smiled. “That was really nice of him. I think my parents went to Venice once. I saw pictures of it, and it was really pretty. I’ve always wanted to go someday”

“Then you should!” interjected Kel “We should all go. Someday when you get out of this place and we’re all grown up and stuff, we should all go to Venice—and then we can ride on those cool boats they have there!”

“They’re called gondolas, Kel,” Aubrey corrected with a huff.  

Kel rolled his eyes, but he beamed at Basil. “Sunny can come too. It’ll be an adventure!”

Aubrey sighed. “It’ll be years before we’ll be able to go to Venice, Kel. We might not ever be able to go there.”

“Well…” said Kel. “In the meantime, maybe Hero can bring his postcard to show Basil the next time we come to visit.”

“Oh wow!” Basil’s face seemed to light up as he smiled at his friends. “I’d love to see it.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Hero tilted his head and gave Basil a bittersweet smile. “I’d love to show you my postcard, Basil. I’m sorry I didn’t bring it. I didn’t know that you wanted to see it. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll be able to come visit you again because I have to go back to college next week.”

Basil’s face fell, but Hero could tell he tried his best to smile at him. “That’s okay” he said. “The doctor doesn’t think I’ll have to stay in the hospital for too much longer anyway. He hopes I’ll get to go home by the time school starts again.”

“That’s awesome Basil!” exclaimed Kel, and Aubrey nodded in agreement.

“I’m so happy to hear that,” said Hero. “I’m sure Kel and Aubrey will take really good care of you and help you get settled back in when school starts.”

“Yeah,” agreed Kel “And if anyone gives you weird looks or something, Aubrey will just beat them up with her nail bat.”

“Kel!” huffed Aubrey.

Before anybody could say anything more, however, the nurse came by to tell them that visiting hours were almost over and that they would have to leave soon. Aubrey and Kel both got up from the table to go to the bathroom before their long drive back to Faraway Town, leaving Hero and Basil alone.

“Are you excited—to be going back to college?” asked Basil.

Hero bit his lip. The honest answer was yes. In fact, he had never been happier to go back to anywhere in his entire life—though he supposed that wasn’t an entirely fair statement. It wasn’t going back to college that Hero was looking forward to—it was the idea of this long, horrible summer finally being over.

He didn’t want to upset Basil by telling him that, however, so he merely shrugged with half a smile and said “A little. It’ll be hard to leave my family again but…I missed school and my friends in the city. Plus, I made plans to see Sunny”

“Really?” asked Basil.

“Yeah. I called him last week and asked if I could take him to one of my favorite coffee places near campus. It’ll be nice to see him again and see how he’s settling in after the move.”

Basil’s expression softened, and he smiled. “I’m so glad to hear that. I’m sure it will mean a lot to Sunny that you want to visit him.” He paused, fumbling around for something in the pocket of his sweater. “That reminds me, I have a letter for Sunny. Do you think you could give it to him for me?”

Hero nodded. “Of course”

“I have one for you too,” Basil continued, handing Hero two envelopes. They were both heavy and lumpy like two small packages rather than letters. Whatever letters were inside must be several pages long.

Hero swallowed hard—trying his best to calm himself with a deep breath. He could only imagine what his letter said, but the truth was, he didn’t want to imagine it. He wasn’t sure he even wanted to read it.

For the entire summer, Hero had been trying his absolute best not to think about what Basil had done. He hadn’t lied to Aubrey when he told her he wasn’t angry with Basil, but he knew there were still complicated feelings, hurts, there under the surface. He supposed he had been running from them—pushing them aside like a kind of self-preservation or, perhaps more accurately, a somewhat desperate attempt at triage.

Triage, Hero thought. That certainly seemed like a good word for it.

In a medical ethics class he had taken last semester, Hero had learned about disaster triage or how to prioritize individual emergencies during a large-scale disaster. It was the best metaphor he could think of for how this summer had felt, especially as far as Basil was concerned. Whatever Hero may have felt or may have been dealing with on his own—it was small and inconsequential compared to Basil’s well-being when he was so fragile and such a danger to himself. Hero knew that he, himself, was hurting. He accepted that, but he couldn’t accept that that mattered, so he had buried his own complicated feelings so deep that he wasn’t even sure what he felt anymore. As he stared at the envelope in his hands, however, his stomach coiled and twisted with the sickening, sinking feeling that as soon as he opened that letter, he wouldn’t be able to run from it anymore.

“Do you…uh…want me to read this now?” Hero stumbled with a crack in his voice. He tried not to sigh too loudly in relief as Basil shook his head.

“It’s kind of long… You should probably read it when you get home. Or uh…”—his voice hitched—“you don’t have to read it at all, if you…”

As Basil’s voice tapered off, Hero reached out to gently pat his twisting hands. “No, um…I will. I’ll try to read it tonight. Thank you.”

“I have letters for Kel and Aubrey too, but I’ll see them when I get to come home so…” Basil’s voice trailed, but Hero nodded.

“I’m really glad that you’re going to get to come home soon, Basil. I’m sure Aubrey and Kel will look after you, but I’m always here too. If you need anything, just call” He reached for a nearby pad of paper and a pen, which Aubrey had been using to keep score during their card game and wrote down his phone number “This is my phone number at college. Feel free to call me anytime.”

As he handed the piece of paper to Basil, Basil smiled and muttered a quiet but grateful, “Thank you.”

Hero sighed. From the look on Basil’s face, he knew that Basil was never going to call him. If Hero had to guess, Basil was probably thinking that as soon as Hero read whatever he had written in that letter, he would regret giving him his phone number and would never want to speak to him again. Hero wished there was a way to reassure Basil that this wasn’t the case, that there was nothing that Basil could possibly say that would ever make Hero abandon him, especially when he needed him most. But as it was now, Hero just didn’t have the words…so he hugged Basil goodbye, wished him well and headed back home to Faraway Town, where he spent the rest of the evening staring at that thick envelope wondering when he would ever have the strength to open it.

When the clock at the bottom of the stairs chimed 8:00 PM, Hero, finally, tentatively reached towards the letter. He held his breath—biting his lip as he carefully opened the seal with trembling hands, bracing himself for whatever might be inside. He pulled out a dense stack of notebook paper which he slowly unfolded counting not two or three but ten pages filled with small, delicate script on both the front and back sides. Thankfully, the pages were numbered.

Hero swallowed hard and staring down at the paper in front of him, began to read.

Dear Hero,

This is the fourth time I have tried to write this letter. My doctor suggested that it would be good for me to be honest with you about my regrets to try to make amends and move forward. I don’t think I’ve been doing a very good job of that, and I’m really sorry if I, or this letter, am a burden to you.

I want to start by saying that I have always looked up to and admired you. I’m sure you know that my family wasn’t ever really around. For a long time, it was just me and my grandma. I never had any brothers or sisters, but I had you and the rest of our friends. You were all like a family to me, especially you, Hero. If I ever had a big brother, I imagine he would be a lot like you—always looking out for me.

You are one of the kindest people I have ever met in my whole life. You always think of everyone else before yourself and try to take care of everybody. Even now, when I know that you’re really hurting, you’ve still come to visit me. You still talk to me and take care of my garden. That really means a lot to me, more than I have the words to say, but I want you to know it’s okay if you’re angry with me. I know I would be. I really hurt you—hurt everybody with what I did, and I am so, so sorry.

I know there’s nothing I can say or do to make amends for what I’ve done, and I’m not writing you this letter to make any justifications or excuses. I only want you to know that you mean so much to me—that my whole life all I ever wanted was to be like you. I never meant to hurt you and knowing that what I did hurt you in ways that I can’t even imagine breaks my heart. But what hurts even more is knowing that even now, even after everything I did, you’re still trying to protect me like you always have.

But you don’t have to do that anymore, Hero. If after you read this letter, you never want to forgive me and never want to talk to me again, I completely understand. There are certain things that can’t be fixed with apologies and regrets. I have a lot of regrets—one of the biggest is hurting the one person in the world I knew would always be there for me. I am so, so sorry…

Hero’s breath got caught in his throat. His eyes burned. He couldn’t read anymore.

“I’m going on a run,” he choked out—frantically reaching for his running shoes. Kel looked up from the video game he had been playing with a confused tilt of his head.

“You’d better bring a jacket. It’s cold out there. I heard on the radio that there’s supposed to be a cold snap tonight.”

Hero nodded, but he couldn’t say Kel’s words really registered with him until he was running against the chilly wind. He wished he had listened to his brother and grabbed his jacket, but at the time he had just been so desperate to get out of there—or, he supposed, more accurately to get away from that letter. There was perhaps something poetic in literally running away from it, but Hero hadn’t really been thinking of that at the time. His jogs were his one lifeline—sometimes the only thing that kept him sane, kept him together when he was about to fall apart. It seemed like the only thing he could cling to now.

As Hero turned the corner out onto the main street again, a cold gust of wind blew past. He shivered. It was far too cold for this time of year. Cold snaps weren’t particularly common in Faraway Town, but they generally happened in the spring rather than the fall, at least as far as Hero could remember. He couldn’t recall a lot of cold snaps. As much as it pained him to admit it, a lot of his memories from before Mari had passed away were becoming hazier and hazier, but he could remember a particularly nasty cold snap from about five years ago…

*-*-*

“And watch out for that unexpected cold front,” said the disc jockey on the radio. “Temperatures will drop to the low 30s and below tonight, so you’ll want to get your coats and sweaters back out for the morning.”

“So much for that spring weather…” huffed Aubrey shaking her head as she stared at her hand of cards. “Also, go fish.” 

Kel groaned seemingly upset about both the upcoming cold snap and the fact he was losing at cards. “I don’t even know where my coat is.” 

“I’ll help you look for it,” said Hero patting his brother on the arm. “I think I just saw it hanging up in the closet.”

As Kel just shrugged and reached to draw some cards from the pile in the middle of the table, Hero felt a hand tugging at his shirt sleeve. Sunny blinked at him then motioned to his coat in the corner where he had left it weeks earlier, back when the weather had finally started warming up.

“That’s very nice, Sunny, but you don’t have to loan Kel your coat. He has one at home, and you’ll need it yourself tomorrow.”

Sunny nodded though his eyes widened in surprise as Mari snuck up behind him wearing his coat and wrapped her arms around him. She giggled as she playfully waved the sleeves around, and Hero stifled a laugh as she teased, “This coat is a little heavier than usual, isn’t it?” 

A slight smile tugged at the corners of Sunny’s mouth, and he let out two quick, heavy breaths—which Hero knew meant he was laughing. Seemingly pleased with herself, Mari’s smile widened, and she ruffled her brother’s hair before slipping out of the coat and handing it to him.

“I already boxed up my coat,” said Basil, nervously twisting his hands. “I think it’s under my bed. I’ll have to go home and check.”

Hero tilted his head at him. Somehow Basil seemed more nervous than usual. Mari seemed to notice as well as her face softened, and she gave him a reassuring smile.

“How about I walk you home?” she suggested. “So I can help you look for your coat.”

“Thank you, but you don’t have to do that, Mari,” sniffled Basil. “I’m sure it’ll be okay.”

“I don’t mind at all. It’ll be easier to look for it with several people helping.”

“I can help too,” said Hero. “After I walk Aubrey home, I’ll stop by and help you look for your coat.”

Basil’s eyes widened, and he held up his hands. “Oh no. You don’t have to do that. It’s really not a big deal at all.”

“And you don’t have to walk me home either,” huffed Aubrey with a slight frown. “I just live a street away.”

“But it’s dark out. I just want to make sure you get home safely.”

Aubrey rolled her eyes, but her mouth twitched in the corners as she shrugged her shoulders. “Alright, fine, but we should probably get going, huh? It’s getting late.”

As they all started to say their goodbyes for the evening, Hero watched as Mari gave him a reassuring smile and a look that said, “Don’t worry. I’ll find out what’s bothering, Basil.”

Hero sighed. Of course she had noticed there was something bothering him beyond just his lost coat. Mari was so good at reading people. She always knew when something was wrong and what to do to make someone happy again. It meant a lot to Hero to know that Basil was in such good hands—though he was sure he would feel a lot better once Aubrey was home safely and Mari had helped Basil work through whatever was troubling him.

After dropping Aubrey off at her house, Hero headed to Basil’s house where he was surprised to see Mari and Basil, who was now wearing his winter coat, out in the yard.

“Basil is worried that his plants will get too cold overnight so we’re going to cover them with some tarps and old picnic blankets,” Mari explained. How she had managed to get Basil to tell her this in such a short amount of time amazed Hero, but he supposed that was just Mari’s way with people. He always admired that about her.

Hero reached for one of the tarps and covered a nearby flowerbed. The cold wind biting at them, loosening the coverings as soon as they had been placed, made the task more difficult than it needed to be, but eventually every flowerbed in Basil’s garden was properly covered, warm enough to survive the cold night.

As the three of them surveyed their work, Basil sniffled. “Thank you so much for helping me. You really didn’t have to do that, but it means a lot.”

Hero smiled as Mari threw her arms around Basil and hugged him tightly.

“It was no trouble, Basil,” she said. “We’re always happy to help. That’s what family’s for.”

Tears pooled in Basil’s eyes as he choked out, “Family?”

“Of course. You’re like our little brother.” Giggling, Mari beamed at him and gently ruffled her hand through his hair. “If you ever need anything, we’ll always be here to help you—no matter what.”

Hero nodded in agreement and patted Basil’s shoulder before giving him a hug himself. Wiping the tears from his eyes, Basil sniffled again before saying his final thanks and goodbyes and heading back into his house.

As Hero and Mari started to walk home, Mari reached for Hero’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Hero smiled at her, but watching her shiver in the wind, he immediately let go of her hand and tried to disentangle himself from his jacket.

“Here, you can take this…” he said holding out his coat to her.

Chuckling, Mari wrapped the jacket around her shoulders and playfully teased, “What a gentleman! Thank you.” She took his hand again—intertwining their fingers. “You’re always so sweet, Hero.”

Hero blushed. He watched his feet shuffling on the sidewalk as his face grew warm. “You’re sweeter,” he gently insisted. “What you said to Basil back there was so kind. I could tell it really meant a lot to him.”

Mari’s expression softened, and something bittersweet passed over her eyes. “I feel so sorry for Basil. It’s just him and his grandma. He must be so lonely…and he’s such a gentle-hearted person. I…” She paused. “I worry about him sometimes. He needs somebody to look out for him.”  

Hero nodded solemnly, but he gave Mari’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Hero?” As Mari looked up with him with wide, kind eyes, Hero’s heart could have melted. A smile twitched in the corners of her mouth as she quietly continued, “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

As Hero nodded, a bright smile once again spread across Mari’s face. “Of course, Mari. We’ll always take care of Basil…and his flowers too.”

*-*-*

Hero stopped. Basil’s flowers. What if it got too cold for them and they froze before Basil even got to come home and see them?

Rubbing his hands together for warmth, he took off running towards Basil’s house where he found Polly out in the yard putting tarps over some of Basil’s flowerbeds.

“Hi Polly. Can I help?” asked Hero with a slight smile. “I was out on a run when I remembered Basil’s flowers and…with this cold snap coming in…” His voice trailed, but Polly smiled.

“Oh that’s so sweet of you, Hero,” she replied. “I’m just about finished, but if you want to cover that flowerbed over there”—she paused, motioning to her left—“that would be a big help.”

Hero nodded, and he reached for a nearby tarp. His brow furrowed as he turned towards the flowerbed—his chest aching at the sight of the clusters of lilies. Lilies had been Mari’s favorite flower, and Basil had always used to say they reminded him of her. When they were kids, Basil had had flowers that reminded him of all of his friends. If Hero was remembering correctly, his flower had been roses—though he had never felt he deserved it.  

Hero’s eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head. There were rose bushes in this flowerbed too. When had Basil planted these?

“This is one of Basil’s favorite flowerbeds, you know?” Polly said quietly. “When I first came to work here, I once found him curled up in it in the middle of the night during a cold snap like this. He had covered the plants but was worried they still weren’t going to be warm enough, so he took the blanket off of his bed and dragged it out here and curled up next to them himself.”

Polly sighed. “When I tried to tell him that they were probably warm enough now and he could come back inside, he wouldn’t. He said he planted these flowers for his big brother and sister, and he wasn’t going to leave them. I was so confused because Basil is an only child, but…after everything that happened this summer…I started thinking…”

Polly stopped and turned to look at Hero. She didn’t say anything more, but she didn’t have to—Hero knew what she was thinking. He was thinking the same thing.

With a heavy sigh, he sunk to the ground. Something coiled and twisted in his chest as he thought about what these last four years must have been like for Basil. Not only was he grieving the loss of Mari, blaming himself for her death and everything that had come after, but he was grieving the loss of his family too, worrying that as soon as they knew the truth, they would see him as he saw himself: unredeemable, unforgivable, and unlovable. Hero could picture him shivering in the garden, desperately clinging to his few remaining memories of the only family he had ever known—waiting for the other shoe to drop, for them to learn the truth and leave him behind forever.

As Hero stared at the flowerbed, the carefully tended roses and lilies that had always reminded Basil of him and Mari, Hero’s eyes burned and his vision grew blurred and misty. He could hear Mari’s words, “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

Hero watched as Polly’s eyes widened in concern. As she leaned forward with an outstretched hand, his brow furrowed. He reached up and touched his cheek—cold from the chilly wind and damp from the tears that had finally struggled free.

*-*-*

“H—Hero?” stammered Basil in surprise as he walked into the hospital’s common area.

Hero gave him a slight smile. “Hey, Basil. How’s it going?”

“I…I thought you were going back to school.”

“Yeah…I…I leave Thursday, but I…” He paused—twisting his hands around the handles of the gift bag he had brought with him. “I wanted to see you one more time. I hope that’s okay…?”

As Hero’s voice trailed, Basil blinked at him with wide eyes, but he managed a brisk nod.

“I brought this for you,” Hero continued, handing Basil the bag. “They’re from your garden.”

Basil pulled out a jar filled with roses and lilies that Hero had carefully picked from his garden with Polly’s permission of course. Hero stared down at his hands and took a deep breath. “Polly told me that flowerbed was one of your favorites. It’s still in bloom and really pretty. I hope you’ll make it home in time to see it before the Fall.”

Basil nodded again but sniffled. “You…you didn’t have to do this. And you didn’t have to come either. I…I know you’re really busy.”

“I always have time for you,” said Hero with a smile. “And after I read your letter, I just…I wanted to come see you because…there’s…something really important that I have to tell you.” He swallowed hard with a slight shrug of his shoulders. “I tried writing it down, but I just couldn’t find the right words and I—”

“It’s okay,” Basil quietly interrupted him with a wavering voice. “You can…say whatever you need to say. I’m ready.”

“No. Uh…um…Basil…I—” Hero stopped abruptly. As he watched Basil tremble, watched the tears pooling in his eyes as he braced himself for the worst, his heart ached. He completely forgot all the words of reassurance he had planned to say and practically leapt forward, wrapping his arms around Basil and holding him tightly. He could feel Basil’s shoulders stiffen—could feel him gasp in surprise.

“He—Hero?” choked Basil—his voice cut off by a strangled, garbled sob in the back of his throat. As he started to shake, Hero knew he was crying, and it broke his heart but not as much as his whispered, “I’m so sorry…”  

Hero pressed his chin to Basil’s shoulder as tears began to prickle in his own eyes. He hugged him tighter—hoping that simple gesture would say everything he didn’t have the words to until finally, at long last, he took a deep breath and said, “I forgive you.”

“What?”

“I forgive you, Basil,” Hero repeated in a trembling voice—taking a deep breath to brace himself for the next part, the hardest part, of what he knew he had to say. “I…what happened…it…it hurt me.” He paused—suddenly struck by the weight of those words and of finally saying them aloud. “But…but that doesn’t make you unforgiveable and that…that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you anymore. I forgive you, and I know it’s probably not my place to say this but…I think…Mari would forgive you too and…she’d want you to forgive yourself. It’s…it’s what I want too.”

Hero’s throat grew dry and burned, but he took a long, shaky breath and continued, “You’ve suffered enough, Basil—punished yourself enough. I know you think that’s what you deserve, but that’s not what Mari would want for you. She really loved you, and all she ever wanted was to take care of you. Beating yourself up about what happened, only hurts you…It’s not going to bring her back. I…I”—his voice hitched— “I know that better than anyone. Believe me…if it did, she’d be here.”

Hero stopped—a lump forming in the back of his throat as his eyes burned with tears. “Mari—Mari isn’t…here…anymore…” he stumbled over his words, until finally he pulled away from Basil, placed both hands on his shoulders and met his teary eyes. “But I am, and I will always be here for you.”

At these words, tears began to pour down Basil’s cheeks as if he had never needed to hear something more in his entire life. He threw his arms around Hero and broke down sobbing. Hero’s face softened, and he pulled Basil close. As he gently patted his back, as he often did whenever he comforted any of his siblings, he caught sight of the jar of flowers on the table: the much loved lilies and roses. Hero sniffled, wiping a tear from his eye, as he thought of Mari and her wish: “Promise me…that we’ll always take care of Basil…?”

“I will always take care of you,” Hero gently whispered. “For both of us…”

[acacia-may]

Am I Ready For Love? Or Maybe Just A Best Friend (HERO-Centric OMORI fanfiction)

Description: While playing "Mom Friend" to his college buddies' shenanigans, Hero is shocked to learn that he is widely considered the "Prince" of their campus. Though flattered, he doesn't feel he deserves the praise, especially seeing as his heart still missed the best friend and childhood love he had lost far too soon. He would always miss her and simply couldn't imagine being with anyone else...but that didn't mean he wasn't lonely. Even self-imposed loneliness wasn't free from sadness. When an unexpected conversation drudges up bittersweet memories for him, however, Hero begins to wonder if he doesn't have to be nearly as lonely anymore. He might not be ready for love, but a best friend didn't sound too bad...

Relationships: Hero & Brandi [Intimidating Girl] Friendship, Hero & Original Characters Friendship, Past Romantic Hero/Mari, Romantic Brandi/OC, Could be Hero/OC if you really wanted to see it/imagine it happening after the slowest of slow burns, but this is more about their platonic friendship and is very heavy on the past Hero/Mari angst. Mentioned Hero & Kel and Brandi & Bebe's sibling relationships and Bebe/Mikhael.

Characters: Hero (POV Character), Brandi [Intimidating Girl], Original Characters, Mari's Memory, Mentioned Kel, Bebe (Short Haired Girl/Fountain Girl) & Mikhael (The Maverick).

Genre: Hero-Centric Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slice of Life, College Life, Lost Love, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Greiving, Catharsis, Heart-To-Heart Chats, Hopeful Ending, Post-Good Ending, Hero Needs A Hug, Hero Deserves To Be Happy

Word Count: 7,779

Rating: T for some heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying) Some language.

Warnings: Major Spoilers for OMORI! Heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some Language.

Link to original post on AO3. Please do not repost to another website. All other interaction (likes, reblogs ect.) appreciated!

A/N: This story (including it's title) was heavily inspired by the song "Turning Out" by AJR (which is just a shot to the heart when thinking of poor Hero 🥺❤️ Highly recommend), and this "Hero's Life After Mari" Universe was co-created by @randomsprinkles. Full story text below the cut.

Thank you so much for reading and cheers to good & happy things for Hero in the future! 💕

“You know, sometimes I think Kel is fine, but then yesterday he called to tell me he ate a whole can of spray cheese”—Hero sighed and shook his head—"nothing with it just the spray cheese…” He shrugged his shoulders, and Brandi laughed. Swapping stories about their siblings was one of their favorite activities—especially at these wilder college parties where they tended to gravitate towards each other in want of a familiar face and company that wasn’t completely wasted. Even though Faraway Town was small, and he had known Brandi nearly his entire life, they hadn’t really become friends until college and the hours they spent together reminiscing about home or making each other laugh with stories about Bebe’s hopeless lovesickness or Kel’s well-meaning but often silly antics. It was a relief to have a friend and a familiar face around, and Hero could never quite tell her how much that meant to him.

“Well, that’s nothing. Bebe is still lovesick over that moron who wears that ridiculous wig and calls himself ‘The Maverick,’” huffed Brandi. “How many times do you think he’s seen Top Gun? I’m guessing at least fifty, possibly a hundred.” As Hero stifled a chuckle, Brandi rolled her eyes as she leaned her elbows on the kitchen counter and poured herself another glass of something, Hero wasn’t entirely sure what and he didn’t ask. He had learned it was better not to.

“Well…his family does run the best bakery in Faraway Town, and—” Hero stopped. He was going to mention how Aubrey had been good friends with Mikhael for quite a while, but then he realized she probably had even less positive things to say about him than Brandi did. 

“I guess, but that’s just his family, and even if they’re great, he’s just…”—she paused as if searching for the right word—“a bozo. I just can’t believe she’d throw away her future for some guy like that. She says she wants to go to pastry school now so she can work in the bakery. She doesn’t even bake! You just wait until Kel starts dating,” she warned with a heavy sigh. “He’ll be driving you up the wall.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Hero chuckled. Truthfully, he was a little surprised that hadn’t happened yet, but Kel didn’t seem particularly interested in a romantic relationship right now, which Hero could respect. He certainly felt the same way himself, though for different reasons, but he quickly pushed those thoughts away and buried them, changing the subject. “Speaking of dating, how are things going with you and C.J.?”

Brandi’s mouth twitched into a slight smile. “Checking up on your handiwork, matchmaker?” she teased dryly.

Hero’s face felt a bit flushed. That hadn’t been his intention, but he fidgeted.  “Are you upset that I set you up?”

“You didn’t set us up. You just…talked him up to me until I finally agreed to go out with him, there’s a difference,” Brandi insisted, and Hero chuckled. He supposed that was true. C.J. was one of Hero’s friends from his fraternity, and he had had the most obvious yet sincere interest in Brandi ever since they were paired up for a legal research course project. Hero had thought they had a lot in common—spirited personalities, strong sense of justice, same Pre-Law major and aspirations to become attorneys someday, and, though he usually tried to stay out of his friends’ business especially their love lives, C.J. had begged him to put in a good word for him so she wouldn’t see him as just another dumb, partying frat boy.

Hero couldn’t blame Brandi for her trepidation around fraternity guys. They didn’t have the best reputation, and if Hero was being honest, he likely would have tried to avoid them himself if he hadn’t been forcibly dragged…er…recruited into a fraternity last pledge term. He would say it was a long story, but it really wasn’t. They needed someone to cook and to clean around their garbage heap of a frat house—a “Mama,” as they quickly deemed him—and Hero was too polite and conflict-avoidant to refuse when Kyle, a sports medicine major in his organic chemistry class, practically begged him to pledge for his frat. His harrowing tale of how they had eaten practically nothing but instant ramen every day for the past year was really the final straw. Now he cooked not only for the fraternity but also for all their guests when they had parties since keeping everyone fed and hydrated with water when they were binge drinking resulted in less vomiting on the carpet and less passing out on the living room rug or in the yard.

That was what he was doing now, after all, making sandwiches on the stove, handing out glasses of water, and keeping an eye on the dwindling bottles of booze. He handed Brandi the grilled cheese he had been making for her with a smile, and Brandi hummed. “Thank you. And thank you for setting me up too, I guess. It’s nice not to be hit on all the time anymore. It was getting pretty annoying.” She laughed, playing with the red glow stick bracelet on her wrist, and Hero chuckled in spite of himself before she quickly added, “I’m really just teasing. C.J.’s a great guy, and we are very happy, so I really do owe you one.”

Hero smiled and shrugged his shoulders. He was glad to help, and it was honestly really nice having Brandi around more often. She cleaned up after herself at least.

“If you ever want me to return the favor, just let me know. I know a ton of girls who would kill to go out with you.”—she laughed as Hero blushed—“I’m pretty sure you’re like the prince of our campus.”

Hero’s face burned. He was sure it must be bright red by now. It wasn’t the first time he had heard that, and it probably wouldn’t be the last, but he never could take a good compliment, even a joking one. “I’m sure that’s not…” he mumbled, but his voice trailed off as he grew suddenly interested in the spatula in his hands. He shook his head and ignored the heat in his cheeks as he changed directions. “Thank you…that’s very flattering, but um…I’m just…I’m not…It’s…” He began to trip over his words, unsure of what exactly he wanted to say, but Brandi thankfully cut him off with a tilt of her head and a knowing, sympathetic smile.

“It’s complicated?” She finished for him, pointing at the yellow glow stick on his wrist. He always picked ‘It’s Complicated’ yellow for these kinds of traffic light parties. It was just the easiest—saved him from the awkwardness of being flirted with and having to turn people down while also not lying that he was in a relationship already.

Hero nodded, and Brandi patted his hand with a soft, bittersweet expression and a knowing smile. She leaned closer to him so no one would hear her whisper, “Your heart’s still with her, isn’t it?”

Something panged in that all too familiar ache in Hero’s chest. He supposed that was one way of putting it. It wasn’t something he ever really talked about, but he supposed it was no secret that he had not had a relationship with anyone since Mari. The truth was, even if he had wanted one—even if he could move on from her, he didn’t think it would be fair—not to Mari’s memory or to whoever he could be with. He had already had a beautiful love story and, even though it was cut short, he felt that to even wish for anything more would be greedy and ungrateful for the time that he and Mari did have together. That said, doubt occasionally set in that that was a bit of an unreasonable notion all things considered—he had been only fifteen when she had passed and had his whole life ahead of him. In the deepest corners of his mind, he knew she would probably want him to move on and be happy again, but at the same time even if he could someday be ready to open up his heart again, he worried that he would never be able to give that other person the love she deserved. He would never be able to say that she was the one and only love of his life and would never be able to tell her that he had never felt this way about anyone. He would always miss Mari, and, now, the only heart he had to give had already been broken and painfully pieced back together. It was so busted and bruised that, if he was being perfectly honest, he had trouble believing that anyone would even want it.

“Hero…”

“It’s okay,” he cut her off with a slight, reassuring smile, and Brandi smiled back. “I’m okay.”

Brandi nodded. “I understand,” she said with a sigh before taking a sip of her drink. “But if you ever change your mind…if you’re ever ready…you know where to find me, and I know where to find a ton of girls who would definitely be interested.” She winked at him, and he playfully rolled his eyes though he scratched the back of his neck when he felt an arm drape around his shoulders.

“What’s going on?” exclaimed Kyle, his voice already starting to slur from too much liquor.

“Brandi’s trying to set me up,” sighed Hero in a dry, somewhat joking way.

Kyle burst into raucous laughter. “Good luck with that. We’ve been trying too—since I’m pretty sure there’s not a girl on this campus who wouldn’t date our very own ‘Prince Charming,’ here, but he’s practicing to be a monk or something.”

“Well, you know, Kyle, it is possible not to have a relationship—it won’t kill you,” bantered Brandi with a frown.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny.” Kyle stuck his tongue out at her. “I know you think I’m a serial optometrist.”

“Monogamist,” corrected Brandi, as Hero covered his mouth with his hand and tried not to laugh. “How drunk are you?”

Kyle hummed, kind of teetering in place. “I dunno.” He turned to Hero. “Mama, how drunk am I?”

Hero sighed, reaching to pour Kyle what was clearly a much needed glass of water. “Here,” he said, avoiding the question. “Drink this. You’ll feel better.”

Kyle nodded and gulped down the water. Hero must have refilled his glass at least twice more, before Kyle leaned his elbows on the counter and asked for a BLT which Hero promptly went to work making. “Thanks. Look, I love my relationships. I just don’t want my friends missing out, you know? And hell, if I was that popular, I’d probably be taking full advantage of it—most guys would. Mama here is an actual saint.”

Hero’s face flushed red, but before he could begin to protest, Brandi interjected with a huffy, “I’m sure you would Kyle” conveniently ignoring his comments about Hero’s supposed sainthood. Her brow furrowed—her eyes narrowing at the green glow stick bracelet on Kyle’s wrist. “I see you’re on the market again. What happened to Tiffany?”

“Eh, didn’t work out,” shrugged Kyle. “We were too different.”

“Realized you didn’t have anything in common besides your love of sucking face?” quipped Brandi sarcastically. Kyle rolled his eyes.

“No,” he insisted, but then sighed. “Alright…sort of…but there were more problems than that.” He sighed. “You know…never mind. I didn’t come over here to talk about Tiffany.” He waved his hand dismissively before his face lit up like a little kid on Christmas. “I wanted to tell you guys, there’s this whole group of girls hanging out in the living room, and they think I look like Nick Carter.”

“How drunk are they?” scoffed Brandi.

Kyle rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, I’ve always thought I looked like him. You think so, don’t you, Hero?”

Hero tilted his head. He supposed he could kind of see it. They had similarly shaped noses, heart-shaped faces, pale skin, light eyes, and blonde hair; however, the trait they had most in common was that curtain bangs haircut, and Hero was fairly certain Kyle had purposely styled his hair that way just to look like he could be in a boy band. Even so, he shrugged and said, “Yeah. You’re practically the sixth Backstreet Boy.”

“See,” he turned to Brandi with a triumphant huff, almost like the satisfied taunt a young boy might give his little sister. Hero chuckled lightly to himself. It reminded him a bit of Kel.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” Brandi insisted. “Hero would say anything just to be nice.”

Hero’s face flushed. He hoped he wouldn’t get pulled back into this argument, but luckily Kyle didn’t seem to hear her, instead insisting, “And here I was going to say I think you look like Celine Dion, but now that you’ve been so rude to me, I don’t think I’ll say anything.”

“I don’t look like Celine Dion, Kyle.” Brandi shook her head before taking a sip of her drink.

“Aw, I think you kinda look like Celine Dion, babe,” C.J. interjected draping an arm around his girlfriend.

“Thanks, but I really don’t…” Brandi sighed, but C.J. cut her off.

“And I always thought I kinda look like Usher but with glasses.”

“Not you too…” she teased though there was a certain affection in her eyes and a twitch in the corners of her mouth. “What is it with guys comparing themselves to celebrities? I honestly thought that was just a girl thing.”

C.J. pouted playfully. “What? You don’t think I look like Usher?”

Once again, Hero could kind of see the similarities—oval shaped faces, wide cheekbones, warm eyes, dark skin, and bright, beaming smiles. They looked about as much alike as Kyle and Nick Carter though he wasn’t sure that was saying much, especially coming from him. Brandi, it seemed, was unconvinced.

“I think you look like C.J.” she said quirking an eyebrow at him.

“I’m not sure I know that celebrity,” he teased wrapping his arms around her neck. “Is he handsome?”

Brandi stifled a chuckle but playfully, pretended to ponder the question before finally meeting his gaze. “Yes.”

C.J.’s face lit up into that beaming, 100-watt smile as he looked into her eyes. Hero recognized that look, like Brandi was the only one in the room and they were lost in their own little corner of the world. She ruffled her hand through his tight curls, and he leaned in and kissed her.

“Get a room you two,” teased Kyle sticking his tongue out at them. With a flick of his finger, C.J. promptly told Kyle exactly what he thought of his comments before he cupped Brandi’s face in his hands.

With a bantering shake of his head, Kyle stared down at his green glow stick bracelet like it was watch. Hero turned away abruptly, his face feeling warm as if he had intruded on what should be a very private moment.

Truthfully, despite the awkwardness he currently felt at their extremely public display of affection, he really was happy for them—for all of his friends who wanted relationships and had found them. If he was being honest with himself, however, it did bring up some complicated feelings for him sometimes—made him feel lonely. It was a self-imposed loneliness, but that didn’t mean it was always free from sadness. He glanced down at the yellow glow stick on his wrist. The truth was it wasn’t all that complicated. Even after all these years, he still missed Mari, and he knew he would always miss her. It wouldn’t be fair to pursue anyone else while he felt this way—to put his new love in a situation where she’d feel like a second choice or a last resort, so he contented himself with being alone, probably forever. A bittersweet smile tugged at his mouth. Maybe he’d get a cat… he thought before turning his focus to making Kyle’s sandwich.  

As he added the finishing touches to Kyle’s BLT, Brandi finally disentangled herself from her boyfriend. “We’re making Kyle and Hero uncomfortable,” she said, but C.J. shrugged, draping an arm around her shoulders.

“Eh, they’re just jealous.” He stuck out his tongue at Kyle, who stuck his tongue out back. Hero sighed. It was very juvenile, but he still chuckled in spite of himself.

“Hey! I’m glad I’m not tied down,” Kyle insisted with a dismissive wave of his hand as he took a bite out of the sandwich Hero gave him.

Brandi frowned. “Tell me, Kyle. Have you ever had a relationship with a woman that lasted more than two weeks?”

“Yes!” He nodded emphatically. “With Zuzu.” He paused then called as loudly as he could out onto the patio. “Hey, Zuzu! Come tell these morons how long we’ve been friends.”

A redheaded girl in an oversized sweater whipped around with a somewhat affectionate if bantering roll of her green eyes. “Too long,” she quipped, wrinkling her lightly freckled nose at them, as she walked through the sliding door back into the kitchen.

“You wound me, Zuzu,” Kyle gasped in teasing melodrama, clutching his chest. “What were you doing outside anyway? Aren’t you usually glued to Mama at these things?”

“Because he’s the only sober person here,” she teased, but she smiled at him.  Hero’s face flushed. It was true that Zuzu, or Zoey as she was called by everyone who wasn’t Kyle, was generally his ‘partner in crime’ at all parties hosted by his fraternity or her sorority—spending the night helping him in the kitchen or passing out cups of water to the groups of plastered college students mingling around the house, and often helping with cleanup and dishes afterwards. Truthfully, he enjoyed her company and the conversations they had—talking and laughing for hours while making food, cleaning up or doing dishes together. Though he always felt guilty about putting a guest to work at his party, she always insisted she had a much better time spending the evening with a friend than she would have getting drunk and partying. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He felt the same way. 

“Like you haven’t had a thing to drink,” retorted Kyle, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and staring down into her cup. Zoey merely blinked at him.

“I haven’t. I have a thermodynamics exam on Monday and need to study tomorrow.” She always blamed her aversion to drinking on her difficult civil engineering major, but Hero knew she just didn’t care for drunk partying. Now that Hero was thinking about it, Zoey blamed a lot of things on her difficult civil engineering major—not least of all the red glow stick on her wrist despite being contentedly single. “Married to school,” she always joked, and Hero often joked the same thing.

“But that’s tomorrow,” Kyle whined.“You and Mama are both such old people.” He stuck his tongue out at them, but Zoey just shrugged with a lopsided smile.

“Old people have more fun. You’ll understand someday, Kyle.”

Hero stifled a chuckle behind his hand, before turning his attention back to the stove.

“Brandi and C.J., back me up here,” Kyle sighed, but when he turned around he realized they had gone, probably to continue their PDA somewhere a little more private, if Hero had to guess, but he didn’t really want to think about it. Kyle huffed. “Whatever. Be boring old grandparents together, I don’t care. You’re the ones missing out.” He grabbed his cup, a beer, and the rest of his sandwich, leaving them in the kitchen alone.

“Don’t mind Kyle,” said Zoey with a shake of her head. “He can be such a moron sometimes, but he’s a nice guy, even if he acts like a kid especially when he’s drunk…But I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that.”

A slight smile tugged at Hero’s mouth. He had been roommates with Kyle for over a year now, and he could definitely attest to that.

“We’ve already hit ‘Touchy-Feely Drunk Kyle’”—Zoey tilted her head at him—“How hungover do you think he’ll be tomorrow?”

Hero quickly stifled a breathy chuckle, but he sighed. “I don’t know. He always thinks he can drink a lot more than he can handle.”

Zoey’s mouth twitched into a dry smile. “I bet you’re an expert on nursing hangovers now. It’s a shame that can’t go on your med school application.”

Hero laughed but immediately felt guilty for it.

“Give him one of those sports drinks with breakfast tomorrow—it’ll help. I keep a ton of them in our fridge back at the sorority house for when the girls go out partying or bar hopping.”

“You really are the mom, huh?” Hero replied dryly, and though Zoey smiled, she raised an eyebrow at him.

“You’re one to talk.”  

Hero shrugged. He supposed she had a point and not just because she was currently holding his “World’s Best Mama” mug with a dry yet triumphant smile.

“Well,” sighed Zoey gathering up some more of the dirty dishes scattered around the kitchen. “Since you’ll probably be pretty busy playing nurse tomorrow, we should probably get started on the clean-up tonight.” She looked around the room with narrowed green eyes. “It looks like a tornado stormed through here.”

With a weary sigh, Hero rubbed his forehead. Unfortunately, she was right. Given the sorry state of the kitchen alone, to say that the party had trashed their place would be a bit of an understatement. It would probably take hours to clean everything up—to say nothing of the several hours of cleaning Hero had already done to prepare for the party in the first place. Hero supposed he could do most of the deep cleaning in the morning when some of his fraternity brothers might be awake to help out, if they weren’t too hungover that is, but, truthfully, he wouldn’t mind cleaning up on his own—after all, he did most of the cleaning around here anyway.

With a sigh, Hero conceded that Zoey was probably right and he might as well start cleaning now. He reached out to take the mug and the rest of the dishes from Zoey and turned on the sink to begin to rinse them out. Hero shook his head. If he had a nickel for every minute he spent doing dishes in this house…

He felt a nudge on his elbow as Zoey joined him, rinsing off some of the plates she had gathered from the table.

“You really don’t have to do that,” he insisted.

“And leave you to clean everything up by yourself?” She paused but not long enough for him to even begin to protest. “I’ve been there—it’s no fun at all.”

“We got our dishwasher fixed,” Hero sighed with a slight shrug of his shoulders.

“Then this won’t take that long,” she continued. “All we’ll have to do is rinse them off.” She pointed a sponge at him with a certain determination in her green eyes that said this sorry excuse for an argument was over, and Hero knew she was right. 

No matter how guilty he may have felt about putting a guest and a friend to work cleaning up his house, he was compliant and conflict avoidant by nature and had no stamina for arguing. She had insisted she wanted to help, and goodness knows he could use an extra set of hands. He would ultimately concede and even though she would insist it was unnecessary, later this week, he’d send her a thank you card with a plate of her favorite cookies or some flowers—or a more thoughtful gift if he could think of one. The last time she had helped him clean up after a party, he had bought her a set of Papa Chip coasters since, while they were doing dishes for hours by hand on account of the then broken dishwasher, they had somehow started talking about how they had both loved Papa Chip back when they were kids.

“And you don’t have to send me any coasters this time,” she teased, and Hero’s cheeks felt suddenly warm, wondering if she could somehow read his mind. “Not that they’re not great,” she added hurriedly. “You’re very thoughtful, but you really don’t have to do that.”

Hero’s face flushed red—he never could take a compliment—but a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I know, but I felt bad and…”

“Well don’t,” she interrupted. “We’re friends, and I don’t mind helping you out. Besides, a bunch of my sorority sisters were giving me dirty looks for about a week until I lied and told everyone they were from Jared. I don’t know if they really bought it or just got over it.”  

Hero’s brow furrowed. He supposed those coaters could be a gift someone’s younger brother would get for them—after all, Kel had gotten him a Papa Chip cookbook “just because,” once—but he wasn’t sure why Zoey had felt the need to lie to the other girls in the sorority house. “I’m sorry if I upset the other girls or made them angry with you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Zoey shrugged it off with a dismissive wave of her hand. “They’re just jealous that we’re actually friends.” She sighed. “I’ve tried to tell them that you’re actually pretty friendly and nice, so they could be friends with you too if they started treating you like an actual person instead of some kind of ‘Campus Prince.’”—she shook her head—“But I don’t think it’s been working.”

Hero blushed. Though he found it very flattering, he still couldn’t wrap his head around how he could have possibly become some sort of ‘Prince’ of their campus in the minds of so many girls.

“You should tell them I’m kind of a dork…” Hero sighed sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.

“I tried that too,” she bantered. “But they didn’t believe me.”

Hero laughed, but his smile quickly faded. “I’m sorry. I’ll stop sending you things.”

“Don’t worry about it,” she repeated, a little more forcefully. “They need to get over themselves. I’m honestly kind of sick of the Hero fan club that goes on in our house.”

Hero’s face felt suddenly warm, and he resisted the urge to bury his face in his hands. “Fan club?” he choked.

“Yes. You, Mr. Prince, are always the hot topic of conversation,” she teased with a lopsided smile. “If you asked practically anyone, they’d say you are probably the perfect man—even my sister who has this awful obsession with bad boys thinks so, which is really saying a lot.” She paused, and Hero stifled a chuckle. Zoey’s twin sister, Lorraine, was a sweet and bubbly girl despite her terrible taste in boyfriends, a topic often bemoaned by both Zoey and Kyle. A slight tint of pink flushed in his cheeks, he supposed it really was quite the compliment coming from her. “And it doesn’t help that you’re so mysterious.”

“I don’t think I’m mysterious,” Hero chuckled sheepishly, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck.

“I know, you’re not,” Zoey cut him off with a reassuring smile. “And I’ve tried to explain that to them multiple times, but they don’t really listen to me since they’re convinced I’m trying to steal you away.”

A blush filled his cheeks, and he turned away from her abruptly. “What?”

“You know, the idea of men and women just being friends, is a little beyond them, I think,” she quipped. “It’s ridiculous, but can you blame them? I mean in their minds you’re a real life ‘Prince Charming,’ and even though you’re interested in women and could have pretty much any girl in the universe you wanted, you’re really, really single.” She chuckled, as Hero buried his face in his hands. He could almost picture that bright, cheeky grin on her face, though he wouldn’t—no, couldn’t turn to look at her again. “You’ve got to be hung up on somebody, otherwise why haven’t you chosen from the hoards of adoring women who would kill to be with you?”

Hero’s face grew hot. He was sure it must be bright red by now. “Zoey…”

“It’s a big topic of conversation is all I’m saying.”

Finally, Hero managed to pull his hands away from his face, if only because his eyes were beginning to burn from the soapy dishwater. “Can you please tell them that I’m very flattered,” he stumbled, still blushing furiously. “But I’m just so busy with school that I’m just not…really looking for a relationship right now?”

Zoey shrugged. “Tried and failed, but I’d be happy to tell them again. Don’t expect them to believe me though. At this point, everybody’s making up their own theories.”

“Theories?” Hero choked.

“You know you have your normal ones like you’re too busy for a relationship or you had a bad relationship in the past and just aren’t ready to put yourself back out there again. Then there are the ones that you actually already have a relationship, but you’re very private about it so no one has ever seen or heard of her. There are a couple of wild ones in this category like she’s a celebrity so you have to keep it a secret so the press doesn’t find out and you end up in a tabloid.” She winked at him. “Just like in a movie.”  

“You are making this up.”

Zoey shook her head. “No, I swear I’ve heard that one, and that’s not even the craziest one. I’ve also heard a rumor that you’ve been promised in an arranged marriage since birth so that you can take over as the CEO of a toaster strudel empire. And, of course, my personal favorite: that you have an eccentric billionaire uncle who wants you to inherit his vast fortune but only on the condition that you remain a reclusive bachelor just like him.”  

Hero laughed in spite of himself. “That’s—none of those are true…” He cleared his throat. “Except the first one about me being too busy.”

“I know, and that’s what I always say. Everybody keeps coming to me and asking about it like I have some secret, inside knowledge or something, but I have a theory just like everybody else,” she joked waving her hand dismissively.

“You have a theory?”

Zoey stopped but shrugged. “I mean…not one that I just sit around and think about, but you can only be asked the same question so many times before you start thinking…” Her voice trailed. “It’s not one I ever tell anyone,” she insisted. “If anyone asks me, I always tell them exactly what you just said, which is that you’re flattered but too focused on school and your future to worry about a relationship right now.”

“Then what’s your theory?” he asked half-jokingly, half-actually-interested.

“You really want to know?”

Hero put down the plate he was scrubbing and shrugged. “Kind of.”

Zoey paused, and when she sighed, Hero fidgeted. “But you don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to,” he hurriedly added.

“No, I…” She stopped though there was the slightest tint of rose in her pale cheeks. “But it’s just a theory. I don’t want to offend you or…”

Hero’s brow furrowed. Offend him? What in the world could she possibly be thinking? His breath caught in his throat. She couldn’t…know…could she?

“I won’t be offended,” he reassured her quietly, but his heart was beginning to pound. “Do you…not believe me? Because it really is true. I’m very busy with school and—”

“No. It’s…it’s not like that,” she cut him off with a sigh as she placed her sponge on the counter. “I really do think that you are very busy with school—studying for your classes and the MCAT and all of that. You just don’t have the time or energy for a relationship right now, but…I don’t think that means you don’t want one.” Zoey paused, her voice growing quiet, and she met his eyes. “I think you do want a relationship—otherwise you wouldn’t be so lonely.”

Hero inhaled sharply—his breath getting caught in his chest. Biting his lip, he looked away from her, staring down at his trembling hands. He wanted to hide—curl in on himself—maybe figure out a way to laugh it off like Kel or Kyle might be able to do, but he was frozen, shocked. Of all the things she could have possibly…? No, that wasn’t the question. The real question gnawing at him was had it really been so obvious?

“Hero?” He could hear the concern in her voice, but he wouldn’t—couldn’t look at her. “Listen, I can just…stop there…”  

“Is there more?” The question slipped out before he could stop it.

Zoey sighed. “Yes, but I feel bad. I can…”

“Go on,” Hero squeaked, barely managing a nod.

Zoey sighed again, and Hero wasn’t sure if she was even going to continue until she finally said, “But…the thing is…you don’t just want a relationship with just anyone. You—you want a relationship with someone you can never be with. And even though you know your love is doomed…”—she paused—“you gave your heart to her a long time ago and you can’t even imagine being with anyone else.”

Something ached in Hero’s chest. Somehow he knew that was what she was going to say, but he had to hear it for himself. He wished he could sink into the floor, could hide from her, from his memories, from himself again. And yet…there was a part of him that didn’t want to.

“Wow…” he barely managed, after a long, heavy silence.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”

“No,” he quietly interjected, his voice hitching. “That was…pretty spot on actually…”

“Oh Hero…” Zoey sighed. “I’m sorry…I…”  

“Don’t be.” He fiddled with the sponge in his hands, and after a few intense scrubs at a particularly stubborn stain, he finally added as nonchalantly as he could manage. “I asked, and you were right…”

“I didn’t want to be right about this.”

Hero bit down hard on his lip as something burned behind his eyes. Scratching the nape of his neck, he let out a breathy, self-deprecating chuckle. “I guess I had just hoped that it wasn’t so obvious that I was so sad and pathetic...”

“I don’t think you’re pathetic.”

Truthfully, he hadn’t realized that he had even said those words aloud until she had spoken them back to him.

“And I don’t think it’s obvious—except to your close friends maybe?” She paused, sighing and placing a gentle hand on his arm. “She must have been special and very important to you. I think it’s sweet that you’re still devoted to her and there isn’t anything wrong with that, unless, you know, she’s married or something, in which case…”—she began to quip breathily, probably in an attempt to make him smile again—“but I don’t think you’re the type…”

Hero’s mouth twitched in the corners, but the ghost of his smile faded as he shook his head. “No, she…uh…” The words caught in the back of his throat. “She passed away.”

“Oh Hero, I’m so sorry.” Zoey wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him into a tight hug. He took a deep shaky breath, staring up at the ceiling ignoring that prickling feeling in his eyes. When she pulled away from him, he somehow managed the slightest twitch in the corners of his mouth.

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago…” He wasn’t sure if his weak reassurances were for her or for himself. “I should probably be over it by now.”

As he couldn’t bear to look at her, he could only imagine what her face looked like right now. He shook his head. He didn’t want to think about it. “I’m—I’m sorry,” he spluttered. “I’m sorry for making you sad. I—”

“No,” Zoey cut him off. “You didn’t make me sad. Hero…if you want to talk about it, you can tell me. I’m your friend—I care about you.” She paused, and Hero bit his lip. He could feel her gentle hand running comfortingly across his shoulders. “You’re not going to hurt me. I can take it.”

Hero finally breathed—a long deep exhale of the breath he had been holding for far too long. She had no idea how reassuring those words were. Still…try as he might, he couldn’t bring himself to tell her. He opened his mouth, but the words got garbled in the back of his throat.

“Take your time,” she whispered.

After several deep breaths he finally choked out, “Her name was Mari.” His voice hitched, then the words began to tumble out of his mouth. “She lived next door for as long as I can remember, and I…I always thought she was just the most amazing person. She was smart and funny and very talented—she was wonderful at arts and crafts and gardening and a really gifted pianist. We even used to play together sometimes, and she was so kind and very generous—she was always going out of her way to help someone and make them happy. And when she smiled”—his voice cracked—”You would have thought the sun shined brighter.”

He paused, sniffled. “I think I loved her before I even knew what that was…And I couldn’t believe it when she felt the same way about me.” As a bittersweet smile tugged at his lips, his eyes grew misty. “We were high school sweethearts, until she died.” He swallowed hard—that familiar, hollow pang in his chest ached.

“We were 15. It’s kind of a long story but…at the time, we didn’t know how she died. We thought—I thought—she had ended her own life”—he inhaled sharply, shakily, unable to stop the words even if he wanted to—“It was probably the darkest time of my life. I was a wreck, and I blamed myself. I…I didn’t even know she was depressed. I thought if I had just talked to her—had just held her tighter, just loved her more—better then maybe she…” He stopped. Blinking back the tears in his eyes, he sniffled and cleared his throat. “But it was an accident. There were…witnesses…we found out later. She—she had a bad knee, you see, and…and she fell down the stairs…landed wrong and…” He stopped abruptly. “You—You’d think learning that would make the guilt go away but it…”

Hero swallowed hard, but he managed a shaky sigh. “But…But with time…eventually I just…threw myself into school and work and extra-curriculars. My parents had always wanted me to be a doctor, and all I could see was years of school, years of residency, long hours of studying and clinicals and work and I thought I could just bury myself in it—stay so busy that I wouldn’t feel it anymore, but it doesn’t ever really go away.”

He sniffled and wiped his eyes again with a shaky chuckle. “I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but I…I’m usually pretty okay. It’s been so many years now, and it doesn’t hurt like it used to. But…but sometimes I’ll see a wave of dark hair or hear a name that sounds like hers or someone playing a waltz on a piano or our song on the radio and”—his voice hitched—“I just don’t know if I’m ever really going to be over it.”  

He swallowed hard. “And you’re right. I can’t even imagine being with anyone else. It wouldn’t be fair—to her, to that person, I mean. What if—I couldn’t love her as much? And you know, I think maybe we all get that ‘once in a lifetime’ love in our lives and I’ve already had mine. It would be greedy to even want anything else. But…but mostly I think it’s just that I wanted to be with her forever, and”—there was a hitch in his voice as tears began to pool in his eyes again—“even now, all these years later, I guess I…I just still don’t know what forever looks like without her.”

A tear finally struggled free from his eye and splashed down his cheek, followed by another, then another. Hero frantically swiped at them, but they wouldn’t stop. Zoey’s arms wrapped around his shoulders again, and she pulled him close.

He wasn’t sure how long she held him. How long he listened to the sound of her steady breathing, felt her hand gently tangling in the hair at the base of his neck. How long it was until she whispered, “I wish you had gotten your forever…”

It wasn’t until he felt the tremble of her shoulders, heard the way her voice had hitched over her words that he realized she was also crying.

He pulled away from her and finally looked in her green eyes—warm and teary. Hero swallowed hard. He had never learned what to say to someone who was crying for him. “Please don’t cry.”  

“Sorry,” she said with the twitch of a bittersweet smile. “I’m not sure I can do that.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything,” he began to ramble. “I just—I…I really should be over it and I just completely dumped all of that on you and I was so…”—he struggled to find the words—“weepy and melodramatic and needy and…”

“No,” she gently cut him off. “You were real. Don’t apologize for that.” She wiped her eyes, and her expression softened. “Hero, what happened was so awful, and the idea of you having to go through something like that, it just—” She stopped. “That’s why I cried. You didn’t hurt me. I told you I can take it, and I’m okay.” She sighed. “And you know for what it’s worth, I think the whole idea of ‘getting over it’ is bullshit. There are some things in our lives that we’ll just never get over. We can get past them, but they’re still going to be there—we just have to learn to build a new life around them, so don’t beat yourself up. You’re still entitled to feel sad. Heck, you’d be entitled to never leave your room again after something like that, but here you are, out living your life, so give yourself a break, okay?” She nodded at him with a slight, reassuring smile before she patted his hand. “And for goodness sakes, stop worrying about me of all people. You don’t have to be the hero all the time. I know it’s your name, but…you don’t have to take it too literally.”  

A light chuckle reverberated in his chest, and a smile twitched in the corners of his mouth. Before he could say anything, however, Kyle burst through the patio door.

“Woah…what’s goin’ on?” He stopped abruptly, and his expression softened. “Are you okay?”

Flushing, Hero swallowed hard nodding and sniffling as he frantically wiped at his eyes. He had completely forgotten himself and couldn’t believe he had just shared what was arguably his biggest, deepest secret in the middle of a house party.

Zoey thankfully jumped to his rescue with a remarkably believable, “We were doing dishes, and poor Hero got some dish soap in his eyes. We’ve been trying to rinse them out, but they got all watery.”

Though it took a few moments, Kyle eventually nodded in understanding. “Oh. That sucks, man,” he said patting him on the back. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Hero managed a slight smile but shook his head. “No, Kyle. Thanks, but it’s okay. I’m fine.”

Kyle nodded again, but Hero saw him glance over at Zoey as if waiting for additional reassurance or instructions. When she nodded at him, Kyle sighed. “Alright, well if you need anything let me know, okay?”

Hero nodded at him then handed him a glass of water. Kyle took it with a smile then walked off towards the living room. When he was gone, Hero sniffled again and turned back to Zoey, sheepish and embarrassed.

“Zoey, I’m sor—” he began to apologize again, but she cut him off.

“No. None of that, Henry,” she insisted with a pointed emphasis on his real name. He could tell she was trying her best not to smile as she said it, probably strange and unnatural for her, if Hero had to guess. It was strange and unnatural for him too. No one ever called him that, ever. He had, of course, told her that she could if she wanted, but she never had—not until now that is. Hero’s eyes widened. Strangely enough, he felt a smile tugging at his mouth and the light flutter of a chuckle reverberating in his chest listening to her say it.

“I’m serious. I’m going to keep calling you that until you stop that,” she insisted. “Stop being a ‘Hero’—stop worrying about everybody else for just a second. It won’t kill you to be a little selfish for once…and it’ll honestly make the rest of us look better,” she quipped with a slight smile, clearly trying to brighten his mood.

It worked. His mouth twitched into a small smile as he replied dryly, “I’m sorry. I’ll try…”

“Good,” she said, but her expression softened as she reached out her hand to him. “But really…how are you? What do you need? What makes you happy when you feel like this?”

Hero shrugged his shoulders. If he was being honest, he didn’t know—even after all these years, he didn’t know, but… just having someone there, having someone listen to him…he already felt better. His face softened, and he felt something warm spreading through his chest as he met her kind eyes.

“Maybe a hero sandwich?” he shrugged his shoulders with a gentle smile, and her face brightened.

She gently nudged him in the arm before playfully taking his spatula. “Great,” she said. “I’ll make you one.”

[sansfangirl24]

Imagine Bakugo during your period

Like him just gently laying on your stomach cuz he's basically a human heating pad and getting your favorite snacks and cuddling

And if you have to go out he makes sure your in the most comfortable clothes ever and he plays your favorite music in the car without complaining and he makes sure you don't have to talk to anyone

But also knowing to back off when your ticked off. He lets you pout in bed and just knocks on the door ever few minutes to drop off snacks and drinks for you and after like an hour or two he'll come see if your in a better mood so he can cuddle you again

I need him so bad

[kelin-is-writing]

WORLD STOP—!!! EVERYONE!!! WE GOT NEW BLACK HAIR DABI CONTENT!!! MISSED HIM SO MUCH PLEASE 😭🖤

[miyamiwu]

Everybody just keeps talking over him, never hearing him out. They’re always assuming about what it is he wants. Is it so hard to shut up for a while and listen to what he has to say first? 😔

[somewhereincairparavel]

jason grace not having a pov in mark of athena is WILD. that's literally supposed to be a book centered around him and reyna, and camp jupiter (in the beginning of the book, atleast). and you're telling me he had no.... pov? like hello? this is peak level of insane writing 😭

[tesspool]

momma might

[st4r-t3ars]

Freedom Burns

[helpallthenamesaretaken]

you know when you're sleeping and suddenly you get a feeling that you're falling and wake up terrified? how more horrifying and terrifying would that sensation be for percy and annabeth?

[seiwas]

thinking about katsuki finding out about that little crush you had on shouto since seeing close-ups of him during the televised sports festival—you were in high school then, too.

he shouldn’t care about it because it doesn’t matter, it was so long ago and shouto’s always been marketed as the pro-hero pretty boy—consistently top 3 most handsome, the front cover of magazines, all that.

this is to be expected, it’s what everyone’s been tempted to react like.

but since finding out, he’s been stewing in… in whatever this bubbling, throbbing feeling in his head means. he’s snappier than normal, face scrunched up more than usual.

and every time he sees shouto he wants to strangle the hell out of him.

[cooloperalawyerskeleton]

THE GREAT SAGE. EQUAL TO HEAVEN.

STARS AM I HAPPY TO FINALLY DO RENDERED VOICES LMK AU ART??? YES, I AM!!!!!!!!

(AND OH MY STARS I AM HAPPY FOR EVERY PERSON WHO COMMISSION ME, I LOVE Y'ALL SM)

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

When Sun Shines Again: Prologue "Hoping I'm Always There"

⛅CHAPTER 1⛅

PROLOGUE: "HOPING I'M ALWAYS THERE"

Description: When tragedy struck, Hero lost not only his dearest friend but also his dreams for the future. Even years later, Hero doesn't know what his "forever" looks like without Mari in it, but somehow he finds the strength to carry on and build a new life for himself. With his family and friends both old and new by his side, Hero struggles through life's ups and downs--the joys and sorrows he faces in a world without Mari. In the beginning, he's only looking to survive it all, but somewhere along the way, he might find a purpose, a reason he's still here. Maybe there really is a way he can learn to be happy again, and maybe, just maybe, when he's least expecting it, he might even find himself slowly opening his heart to love again--he might even find himself believing that even the darkest, stormiest of times will eventually pass and the sun will shine again.

A Hero-Centric story spanning 15 years of his life post-good end. Focuses on Hero finding healing & building a life for himself after the loss of Mari. Eventually includes him learning to love again after an extremely slow burn. All pairings are tagged upfront. Rated T for heavy themes & some language. Reading the prequel is recommended but not required.

Chapter Specific Notes: The prologue is HeroMari-Centric and Mari actually appears in this chapter.

⛅Tags For The Story As A Whole (So A Lot Of These Are "Eventual" Tags):

Romantic Relationships: Main Ships: (Past) Hero/Mari and (Eventual) Hero/OC. Side Ships: Brandi/OC and a brief mention of Mikhael/Bebe are the only side ships involving canon characters.

Platonic Relationships: Hero & Brandi Friendship, Hero & Original Characters Friendship. Some Hero & Kel Siblings Relationship & Brotherly Friendship.

Characters: Major Canon Characters: Hero (POV Character), Brandi [Intimidating Girl], Mari and Mari's Memory, & Kel. Major Original Characters (Hero's college friends): Kyle, C.J., Zoey, Tamra, and Lorraine. Mentioned Canon Characters: Sunny, Basil, Aubrey, Sally, Hero's Parents, Bebe (Short Haired Girl/Fountain Girl) & Mikhael (The Maverick).

Genre: Hero-Centric Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slice of Life, College Life, Lost Love, Finding Love Again, Finding Healing After Grief, Slow Burn, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Greiving, Catharsis, Heart-To-Heart Chats, Hopeful/Happy Ending, Post-Good Ending, Hero Needs A Hug, Hero Deserves To Be Happy

Rating: T for some heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some language.

Warnings: Major Spoilers for OMORI! Heavy themes and thematic elements (i.e. grief & healing from grief and trauma. Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death & Implied/Referenced Mental Health Issues including depression & suicide. Mentions of Underage Drinking & Partying). Some Language.

Chapter Word Count: 2731

Link to Original Post on AO3.

Full chapter text below the cut. Thank you for reading! ⛅

“Can I open my eyes now?” giggled Mari—one hand over her eyes. The other held tightly onto Hero’s hand as he led her into the backyard.

“Almost,” he replied with a somewhat sheepish chuckle, and Mari laughed again.

“Okay…but can you tell me where we’re going?”

Hero bit his lip before he accidentally spoiled the surprise. He knew that Mari had always loved surprises, but he also knew that he himself was not much of a surprise kind of person. While he was trustworthy and could keep a secret if asked, he found it too difficult to keep things from his friends and family for too long, especially if they were good things that he was excited about. He had been planning this surprise for Mari for weeks now, and, he was sorry to say, had nearly slipped up and told her about it a couple of times already. Truthfully, a part of him even wanted to go ahead and tell her now, but they were almost there so he promised himself he’d manage to keep it a surprise for just a few more minutes.

“Almost,” he repeated, laughing a little at his repetition.

“Ooh…”Mari chuckled before she donned a frown and began her best impression of a serious commanding officer in one of the war drama films they sometimes watched with his dad. “It’ll be hard to break this one, general. His lips are sealed.”

Mari teasingly saluted at him, before covering her eyes again. For Mari’s credit she had kept her eyes firmly closed shut so the hand covering was merely a formality. “Bet I know a way to unseal those,” she giggled—her tone playful not sultry, though she did blow a kiss at him and Hero suspected she would have winked in his general direction if her eyes had been open.

“Mari—” His voice cracked, and Hero’s face flushed red as he shook his head.

“What? I just meant I bet you’d tell my pet tarantula.”

Hero’s face blanched. “That’s not funny,” he tried to insist though his breathy laugh seemed to imply otherwise. “Don’t even joke about having a pet tarantula.”

“Aww…” Mari pouted teasingly. “But I’ve really been thinking about getting one.” She paused, then added, “Just kidding. You know I’d never do that to you.”

Giving Hero’s hand a reassuring squeeze, Mari giggled again—her laugh light and tinkly like a music box. Hero had often thought it was a far prettier melody than even the most beautiful songs she played for him on her piano, but like any usual teenage boy, he was far too nervous and shy to even begin to tell her that. Still, seeing as Mari was his closest friend and knew him better than probably anyone else in the world, Hero had always suspected she already knew how he felt—how his heart raced whenever she met his eyes, how his chest ached whenever she called his name or how his stomach fluttered whenever she patted his back or held his hand or leaned her head on his shoulder. Mari had to know that whenever he was with her, he felt like they were in their own little world, had to know that he couldn’t see anyone else but her and that he could laugh or sing or just combust from how positively and completely happy he was to even be close to her, listening to what she had to say and trying his best to be supportive and make her smile.

With a sigh, Hero’s face softened as he watched Mari smile now—giggling as she stumbled with her eyes closed. Mari had the most beautiful smile—bright, beaming, and so warm that Hero could have sworn it made even the sun shine brighter.

He would do just about anything in the world just to see that smile—though the truth was he would do just about anything in the world for her, no matter what it was. He’d even spend all weekend cleaning off his patio just to plan a special afternoon for her before they headed back to school for the new term. And if she didn’t know that already, she’d probably know it as soon as she opened her eyes.

“But uh…oh, watch your step.” Hero reached out to steady her before she stumbled onto the uneven pavement of the patio, and his face flushed scarlet as she tripped a little—practically twirling into his chest as she clutched onto his arm. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, though I’d be better if you’d let me open my eyes so I could see where I was going,” she teased as a playful smile tugged at her mouth. “It’d be nice to see your pretty face too.”

“Mari,” choked Hero—his face blushing an even deeper shade of red. He looked away from her, even though he knew she couldn’t see him as long as she was respecting his wish that she keep her eyes closed, but she squeezed his hand and intertwined their fingers.

“You didn’t have to surprise me, you know? It’s not even a special day or anything.”

Hero shrugged his shoulders. “I know, but I wanted to. We’ll be going back to school soon so I wanted to plan something special for the end of the summer, and there’s”—his cheeks grew warm as he shuffled his feet on the pavement—“there’s something I want to show you.”

“Ooh…mysterious,” giggled Mari, but her smile widened.

“Not really…” Hero shrugged. “But I hope you’ll still like it.” With a long sigh, Hero took one final glance around the yard before finally saying, “Alright. You can open your eyes now if you want.”

As Mari dropped her hand from her face, her eyes fluttered opened—blinking in the bright sun. She gasped. “It’s beautiful.”

Hero smiled but shuffled his feet as his face flushed. He had been hoping she would say that. He had spent hours working on building that canopy out of plywood with his dad, and while it was somewhat crude, basic work, even Hero could admit that it did look very pretty when covered in the garlands of flowers he had made with Basil. Sunny and Aubrey had helped too—and Kel, for a little while before he got distracted and Hero asked him to move all the outdoor furniture to the perimeter of the patio leaving a big, empty square in the middle.

“What is all this, Hero?” Mari asked, turning to him with wide, smiling eyes.

Hero shrugged his shoulders and twisted his hands. “Well…I was thinking about how you had to miss the Spring Formal…”

“I told you that’s okay. I can always go next year,” Mari insisted giving him a reassuring pat on his arm.

Hero’s expression softened. He wouldn’t tell her but he knew she was putting on a brave face and had been genuinely disappointed when her bad knee had started acting up again back in April and her doctor had urged her not to put any weight on it for a while, meaning she had ended up back on crutches for the week of the dance and about a week and a half after that. Mari had insisted that Hero should go on without her, but he hadn’t wanted to and instead had gone over to her house where they baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies together and curled up next to each other on the couch to watch old black-and-white movies. Hero thought it had been a much more fun evening, especially seeing as he couldn’t dance, but he had been hoping to make it up to her for a while.

“I know,” he said with a gentle nod. “But I still felt bad that we never got to dance together so I thought…” As his face flushed, his voice trailed. He looked away from Mari instead glancing over at his suitcase record player which he had set on the patio table under the big sun umbrella. “There’s also a song I’ve really been wanting to play for you…”

Hero opened the record player suitcase and carefully took his vinyl copy of The Beatles’ Revolver out of its jacket and sleeve. Knowing that it was the first record he had ever purchased for himself filled him with a sense of pride. After wearing out his parents’ cassette of the album listening to a particular song over and over again for his own enjoyment and “Yellow Submarine” which was Kel’s favorite, Hero decided that he’d like to own the record and hear what it sounded like in vinyl. Hero had a small but growing collection of vinyl records—most of which he had gotten as gifts for his most recent birthday after having gotten his portable, suitcase record player for Christmas, but he had only recently started adding to it himself. Most of the money he made at his summer job cleaning pools and mowing lawns was being put away to help him pay for college when the time came a couple years from now and the rest was going towards having enough money to buy gifts for his friends and family for birthdays and the holidays when they rolled around, but he allowed him a little bit of money for himself and saved up most of to buy a vintage copy of Revolver that their local record store had proudly displayed in their window. He could have sworn he was walking on air when he had finally purchased it and though he had added several other records to his collection since then, this was by far his favorite and the most special to him.

Smiling brightly, Hero gently set the needle to his favorite song, the reason he had been so eager to purchase the record in the first place. At the sound of the opening chord and the first line, “To lead a better life, I need my love to be here…”, he held out his hand to Mari and asked with a somewhat shy shrug of his shoulders, “Would you like to dance?”

Mari beamed at him. “I’d love to.”

Hero flushed as Mari wrapped her arms around his neck, but somehow he fumbled his way to placing his hands on her waist. He took a deep breath trying to remember back to the dancing practice he had been trying out in his room for the past few weeks, much to Kel’s giggly confusion. Hero sighed. He wasn’t sure if his attempts at practice had helped much and he apologized, “I’m sorry. I’m not a very good dancer.”

“That’s alright. I’m not very good either so we can muddle through together.” Mari’s smile widened, and she tilted her head. “This is a beautiful song. I’m not sure I’ve heard it before.”

“It’s called ‘Here There and Everywhere’, it’s”—Hero’s voice cracked and he stared off intently over Mari’s shoulder as his face blushed red—“it’s my favorite love song. I actually bought this record because I couldn’t stop listening to it.”

“I’m glad to hear it’s your favorite because it’s our song now so we’ll probably be listening to it a lot,” she teased, winking at him.

Hero chuckled lightly, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck before remembering he was still supposed to be holding onto Mari’s waist. “Our song?”

Mari nodded. “Everyone knows that the first song that you ever slow dance to is special. That’s why a lot of people dance to it at their weddings.” Mari giggled behind her hand, and Hero’s heart raced as he took a deep breath hoping his face wasn’t as red as he feared. “But no pressure,” she added teasingly. “All I meant was that you’ll have to start thinking about us and about me when you listen to it from now on.”

Hero bit his lip shuffling his feet as he danced with her. “I…I don’t think I’ll have to start doing that…” he admitted, his face growing suddenly hot. Mari’s brow furrowed.

“What do you mean, silly? You can’t just not make this our song—it’s our song forever now. You should have thought of that before you played it for me.” Giggling, she winked at him playfully. “Or were you planning to go around playing it for all the other girls?”

“No,” Hero insisted with an awkward, breathy chuckle—his face crimson as he tripped over his words. “There’s…there aren’t any other girls…that’s…that’s what I was trying to…” His voice hitched, and he swallowed hard. “I…I always…only think about you whenever I listen to this song. It’s…it’s your song.”

He bravely met Mari’s eyes, and she smiled at him—that beautiful smile that made the sun shine brighter. She reached out and pressed her palm to his cheek.

“Our song,” she gently insisted, and Hero nodded at her as she ruffled the tips of her fingers through his hair. Hero froze—his hands beginning to tremble as Mari’s eyes fluttered closed and she leaned forward. His heart pounded. Was she…? He swallowed hard. Was she going to kiss him?

“You guys are so gross and mushy!” exclaimed Kel jumping out from behind a nearby tool shed. “Why don’t you listen to a good song next like ‘Yellow Submarine’?”

“Kel!” scolded Aubrey’s voice though Hero couldn’t see her apart from her arm tugging on Kel to come back to his hiding place, but Kel shrugged her off.

“What? It’s a better song than this!”

“I think it’s sweet,” Basil’s voice gently interjected.

Hero was too busy blushing at the unexpected audience to say much of anything in response, but Mari just laughed returning to her best impression of a character in a military drama, “Looks like we have a few covert operatives on our hands.”

“You’ve been watching too many movies with my dad,” chuckled Kel as Mari motioned to him.

“Why don’t you come on out and dance too?”

Kel practically sprinted over the patio. “Awesome! I think ‘Yellow Submarine’s’ next right, Hero?”

Hero nodded as Aubrey, Basil, and Sunny followed quietly and somewhat apologetically behind.

“Sorry, we didn’t mean to interrupt,” Basil insisted nervously twisting his hands as Sunny nodded in emphatic agreement.

“Kel is such a moron,” huffed Aubrey shaking her head at him. “Sorry Mari. Sorry Hero.”

“It’s okay,” Hero finally managed, patting Aubrey’s head reassuringly as Mari gave both Sunny and Basil comforting pats on the back.

“It’ll be more fun with everyone anyway,” Mari added before she turned to Hero with a kind, affectionate smile. “Besides that’s our song now so we’ll have plenty of time to finish our dance.”

Hero nodded at her, but before he could say anything he stumbled backwards, startled by Mari’s suddenly hug. Basil and Aubrey both giggled behind their hands—probably at Hero’s bright red face as Sunny watched with wide eyes and Kel was, naturally, far too distracted by his own prattling about “Yellow Submarine.”

Taking a deep albeit shaky breath and trying to calm his racing heartbeat and trembling hands, Hero wrapped his arms around Mari. “You’re right,” he said. “We have plenty of time.” Mari hummed, nestling her chin into his shoulder as Hero pulled her close—holding her tightly as if he never wanted to let go.

It was hard enough to manage that given the shy, awkwardness of his youth. In his mind, Hero thought of a day years down the road when he would be older and more confident, when hopefully it wouldn’t be so hard to tell her how he really felt. He had no way of knowing that that day would never come—that for years later he would think back on this moment—desperately wishing he had restarted the song, had finished that dance, had been brave enough to tell her how much she really meant to him. Hindsight really was 20/20. Hero knew that possibly better than anyone, but it didn’t stop him from wishing that he just held onto her tighter because someday the day would come when he was left alone with only a song and the memories of a wonderful girl he had always thought of when he listened to it. He still thought of her and probably always would, but she wasn’t there to dance with him anymore.

[herbarimoon]

A doodle idk

[xspidershex]

I want to save people

[momomallowart]

Human curling iron + gamer who doesn't stop yapping ʕ⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴥ⁠ꈍ⁠ʔ

Here's a version without the text + a closeup too 🫶💗

[touyafootfetish]

father of the year ⁉️