#hes my favourite. my beautiful sweet gray boy.

[solsticethebatearedfox]

damn, cats really are Creatures, aren't they? Couldn't find my sweet boy anywhere in the house, swore he was inside for the night, but he wasn't in any of his usual spots. And I couldn't see him anywhere else either - I even checked in the kitchen cupboard. So, I instead loudly opened his food drawer, and made tin cluttering noises. He instantly teleported in front of me from who knows where. Typical 🙄

[unabashednightmarepizza]

𝑆𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐺𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑒

Summary: Black Family sucked. That's what your friends, your family and boyfriend said. They were obsessed with being "pure" and ready to do anything to achieve that... But none of you would have known exactly what measures they would go.

A/N: I went overboard with this one, and had to seperate it to two parts. So, hopefully, next week, you guys will have a second part. But I'm sleepy while uploading this so... Forgive me if there are some mistakes, I'll fix them later. REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

Trigger Warning: Mentions of torture and abuse, some very slight make out mentions(?), typical Black family, 8.2K words.

Pairing: Regulus Black x Pureblood!Fem!Reader

Prompts: "No one makes me smile the way you do.", "I've always loved that about you.", " I know I don't say it a lot, but I really do love you." and "You're all I'll ever need to feel better." from this prompt list ; 3,6,7,8,9, 19, 22, 29, 30 and 31 from the kissing prompts 4 of my "SUMMER CELEBRATION" event.

Part2

Regulus wasn't seen.

It wasn't like he wasn't at the school where you both called your home, he definetly was. There were glimpses of him in lessons, or Quidditch practices, there were slight whispers of his rich and silky voice as he spoke to his friends in the Great Hall, one that you could always catch no matter where or when. It was the same voice that whispered you sweet good mornings, the same voice that told you soft spoken, full of love and adoration, words as he danced with you in somewhere away from the prying eyes, his own blue-ish gray ones looking extra ethereal and captivating at the moonlight that shone on both of you, contouring his sharp face so beautifully that often left you speechles.

Speechles at how this amazing, caring and loving boy was yours. And he often felt the same about you, about how lucky he was for finding you in that library corner, drowning in books and hair messy, at his lowest point.

A point where no one really made it an effort to listen to him, to know him.

By his friends, his parents... His own brother.

But, even if he wasn’t heard or seen by his family, Regulus Black was seen in Hogwarts, by many others... But not you.

Not today.

He was avoiding you.

It hurted you whenever he distanced himself. He often did this, but even then, he would tell you that he just needed to be alone and gather his thoughts after a kiss to your forehead and then return a few hours later with your favourite dessert from one of the house elves. They even learnt when to bake them for him and you, after witnessing how bice you treated them and such, they were happy to stay awake a few more hours so that you two could be happy.

And of course, you understood that everyone could need some alone time in this hectic life, Regulus more than anyone, but this much of being alone...

He didn't even come to dinner time, instead saying some bullshit about wanting to sleep and tell you to eat with your friends after a soft kiss to your cheeks and a short kiss to your lips. He would always lay some on your lips, and even pepper your whole face with them. His kisses were always so passionate, they left you a breathless mess at the place he kissed you, making you jump on him as you both laughed in delight.

Be it his dorm, you would jump on the bed and you two would play fight, looking into each others eyes as he would hover over you, a hand on your waist with a thight grip as his breath fanned your face, his nose touching yours as he would muzzle his to your neck. You are beautiful, he would whisper before his kisses would turn urgent and you both’s clothes would soon be thrown away at somewhere.

Regulus Black was a passionate young man, someone who felt deeply... But that passion was slowly dying.

And it was your greatest fear coming true.

“Excuse me, guys... I don’t have an appeatite...” you slowly got up as you looked at them, apologizing with your eyes. People always thought them to be such fuckers but Barty and Evan, as long as they weren’t in their teasing romance, were actually great friends of you and Regulus... Barty was the first one who adopted you in the group, back before you were sorted in any houses, in the train and... Perhaps, you were the only one they loved in another house.

“Where are ya goin’? Ya haven’ eaten anythin’?” Barty pointed to your plate as a sheepish look came over you, lips tugging to a sweet smile, hoping that he would let it pass. He wouldn’t have fallen for the puppy eyes, not for the 97th time, had Evan not pointed to who was missing on their table as well.

“looking for her boyfriend, I see...” you gave a sad smile at Evan as he nodded to the entrance of the Great Hall. He, too, was aware that something was... more wrong with the Black as well, but none of them could come close enough to question him without getting blasted off. “Go. That boy never admits, but he is very dependant on you... He needs you.”

But, if there was anyone who could do that... And perhaps, it was you he wanted to have with him, it would be you.

He had seen from first-hand experience how good you affected the boy, how he seemed happier. Though he would always tease him for the heart eyes he sent your way, or how he would get up from his seat and hug you at the entrance of the Great Hall as soon as he sees you, and also accompany you to his side as you talked with his friends and then, sit with you in your side of the table with your friends at lunch time or dinner, he was glad he found some solace in you.

He was aware of the “pureblood nonsense” most “pureblood” families believed in, his and Blacks for example, and did anything to make their children believe in it too. Regulus was still considered lucky in his eyes, for having Sirius protecting him since he didn’t have someone that would protect him.

And now that they were friends, there was no way in hell that he would allow him to relapse into those bad thoughts that could never actualy stop swirl in his head.

You beamed at Evan as your sprinted from them, Evan yelling after you that they would bring some food for you two while Barty hissed about you not doing any funny business. Evan elbowed him hard as Barty whined about how Regulus was becoming soft, and pink, and domestic around him so much that he couldn’t take it anymore. I love our girlie, and cold bitch of a friend but they both make me... sick...

You couldn’t care less about what they said though. Your mind was only on Regulus and how in pain he looked earlier, even when he tried to hide it behind his steel look. You wondered if it was the anniversary of his brother leaving him behind, but quickly checked it out. Maybe his parents were strict and harsh to him again? But he always said he was used to their harsh ways of teaching...

And now that you stopped in front of the the door seperating you from the Slytherin Common Room... You realized that you didn’t know much about your own boyfriend as much as you were supposed to. And that thought made you frown as you looked down for a moment. You knew how... intense things can get with the “pureblood thing”, even though your family wasn’t that harsh when it came to that ideology, you could only imagine what was going on behind the Black household’s closed door by what Sirius had told you.

Pain, screams and suffering enough to make even the strongest wizard or witch cry their eyes out, just to escape, just to... end it all.

Much like the sniffles coming from insidehis dorm after you entered, sniffles that did nothing to ease your nervousness.

And there he was, your absolutely soft and loving and perfect boyfriend, laying on his side as he clutched his cushion thightly while sobbing uncontrollably , his body heaving up and down as his cries rolled off his tongue and reached your ears. Your heart clenched painfully at the heartbroken boy before you, twisting an invisible knife deeper and deeper with each of his cries as you slowly walked up to him and sat down on the bed, alerting him to your presence before putting your hand on his shoulder and caressing his shoulder comfortingly with sad eyes.

“Reggie...” you knew how he hated that nickname, even throwing a fit to Evan how he didn’t like, though he always said he preferred only you to say it, so when he didn’t react even at that name, you sprinted to his other side after applying a locking charm to the door, guessing he would want to be alone with you right now withour anyone barging in.

At first, he tried to deny you and your touch, but you were persistent. When you said yes to date him, you made a promise to him that day: even if your ways split, you would still be there for him through thick and thin.

You wouldn’t ve another person who left him alone.

“I’m not leaving, I’m here... You’re safe, Regulus...”

And perhaps, it was the way your voice so softly comforted him and how your hands glided through his black curls, or maybe he was too tired after crying his heart out. Whatever it was, he suddenly got up and launched at you, burrying his face to your neck as you sat down on your butt and swayed him from side to side like a baby. Regulus was a man who fought until his last breath, someone who rebelled silently, someone who stood on his ground so strictly that you often thought there would be nothing that could break him.

What happened to him to make him turn into a mess?

What did they do this time?

He was talking, rambling about how bad it was and how she was gonna kill him for it but you didn’t know what “it” was. Your frown hardened by each passing second as his rambles got more intense with fear, fear of his own mother.

“ I-I h-had to leave... I had to leave there, Y/N! They... They wanted-“ another choked sob raked through him as you hugged him even thighter than previously, lifting his head in a hurry and desperately searching for your eyes, to see if you believed him, if you were trully there, if you were... real.

You held onto his face softly, running your thumb up amd down through the bridge of his nose as you kissed his lips to prove to him that you were real, and he was safe in Hogwarts, making him feel all of you as his tears wet your lips, leaving a bitter taste at your tongue.

Not from the salty taste, but the pain they held.

Your mind already finished his sentence without him actually doing so. Because there was only one thing you both feared, one thing that kept him awake at most nights...

One thing that made him cry onto your shoulders that much...

“Did they... Did they do it?” your shaky whisper shook him from the half-trance he was in, and your question made you shiver as if You-Know-Who’s hands were around your neck, your shoulders, the death and chaos that followed him around reeking even in the comforting bubble you two had in Regulus’ dorm.

He shook his head as his hands twisted the silk of your robe. “No... Bella came to the house, said that she wanted to take me to him... The Dark Lord. She said it would be an honor to fight for his cause...” he paused  to gulp down the bile that rose to his throat, clenching his eyes shut and focusing on your comforting smell and warmth. He slowly calmed down and looked at you with his ocean blue eyes, wondering how it was possible for you to net be like his own family, how you were so kind and different than others. When he first saw you in the Great Hall, everyone was looking at you in awe, some were jealous and some were scared. Mostly half-bloods and muggle-borns who was now aware of your family and how in danger they were with a school full of purebloods who mostly wanted to get rid of them.

But just as your kindness and warmth eased him many times, they eased those who once feared you as you welcomed them all happily with open arms, making them promise to turn to you if something were troubling them. You proved everyone that you and your family wasn’t like those psychopaths who was hellbent on killing them, even if it made you be branded as “blood-traitor”. You didn’t seem like you cared much about it, rather spending time with your friends even when nasty Slytherins threw insults at you. All you did was to flip them off and go back to whatever you were doing...

And this was why he hesitated to talk to you at the beginning, both from his family status and the nasty comments that would be thrown at you from his house in Hogwarts. He thought you were only kind to muggle-borns and half-breeds since they were being bullied constantly and, harsh to the purebloods who insulted you.

And he was a pureblood... which meant that you would defiently flip him off and even hurt him.

Which proved to be wrong soon, when he cautiously walked up to you in potion class and asked for help as you turned around and gave him a wide smile as you patted the spot next to you. He didn’t want to think back to how close you two were as you listed the ingredients behind him and looked from his head and down at the cauldron to see if he was doing it right.

But it was the happiest he had ever been as you smiled at him and patted his back proudly as you called for the Professor and showed him your works. That was the moment he realized that he could talk to you without any fear, and also, come to you with some of his problems whether you were able to solve them or not. But perhaps, the biggest discovery about his first meeting with you was...

Knowing deep down that he would fall for you, and your dedication for those close to you.

He was proven right, and it was also a joy to realize this as much as it pained him.  He knew with what kind of burden he came, and he didn’t want to do that to you. It wasn’t fair to such a sunshine person like you. But he had been a bit more selfish than he wanted to admit in his life, and he needed a light... A hope that showed him, told him that his days that was often covered with darkness would be gone soon.

He didn’t know what he did to deserve you, to have you return his feelings almost 2 years ago, but he was so damn glad to Merlin that you were in his life, that you were his light, his saviour.

Just a few minutes ago, he was miserable and scared and didn’t know what else to do. He felt like he was cornered like a wild, hurt animal, not knowing or seeing a way out.

But at least... He had you, he would always have you.

It wasn’t like he didn't come clean with this, his family and how they supported Voldemort. It was actually one of the main reasons that even if he loved you, his heart called for you, he would never try to court you. He couldn’t bring himself to be the reason your smile would fall, the reason you would be dragged into his mess.

But still... Both of you naively thought that he had more time, that you both had more time to act like a normal couple living a pink romance.

That was what you wanted to have. For Regulus to feel safe and happiness, away from the tragedy that was his family.

Apparently, Merlin had other plans.

“B-But... You’re still in school? I thought they wouldn’t...” your voice died down as horror filled you for what was coming to your ways. You were aware of their bond with the Dark Lord, and that they would make either him or Sirius join the DeathEaters too. Sirius was safe now that he ran away and seeked help from James, and you were happy for him. Sirius, James and Remus were your friends anyways, you loved hanging out with them or tutoring them.

Which meant almost all the time.

They were nice people, happy to help you at any time and anywhere, or well, every person who they loved and cherished...

That was exactly why you didn’t understand when Sirius appeared in James’ house alone, leaving his little brother, 14 at that time, alone in such a “hellhole”.

Alone and defenceless, crying much like now as he curled in a ball...

But deep down, you knew that Sirius was worried about him too. You knew him, and listened to him as he cried to you about how he wasn’t used to feeling safe and how worried sick he was for his brother. Something must have happened for Regulus to not let him come with his brother, and Sirius to not drag him away from that house.He, after all, was a stubborn little shit whether the situation was good or not.

 But whatever it was that made both of them not to talk for months and reconcile, it came back to bite everyone’s ass.

“I know, love... I know...” he kissed the tip of your nose as he tried to comfort you back, feeling your fear as his. That was one of the reasons why he fell for you: You felt everyone’s pain even when they really didn’t deserve it.

And though he liked watching you get protective and help someone out while he stood behind and admired you, the tears sitting at the corner of your lovely eyes did nothing but break him even more as he wiped them away, kissing just under your eyes softly, afraid of inflicting you with even more pain.

“That’s what I said, that I should finish school first but... Mother said it was full of dirty wizards and witches, muggleborns and half-bloods. She said I was better off without all those scums....” your brows furrowed at how Walburga Black was so... full of hatred at those who wasn’t like her, her sons included. You probably never saw another human who was so full of hatred, her negativity pouring as venom, trying to poison everyone just as she once was. You had a good guess of why she was like this, why she always threw hatred and so many curses on practically everyone.

After all, none of her sons turned out to be like the Black family. Both of them didn’t support the “Pureblood nonsense” like they did, and Sirius was brave enough to rebel against them while Regulus did it more silently. He showed himself to be just like the perfect Black heir, did everything they asked for and stood tall against them.

He wasn’t brainwashed by them, and though they weren’t proud of him- and could never be- You were so damn proud for him, just like a certain older brother.

You didn’t know it but Regulus, had it been not for you, he feared he would have actually believed in them and what they said, solely for the reason that he wanted them to love him, to acknowledge him as a son. They wanted perfection and he wanted to be perfect, he needed to be perfect.

Because if he wasn’t... Who would he be to anyone?

You are Regulus Arcturus Black, he remembers you telling him after he finally came clean to you about what was in his mind, after asking you out. He was so sure you would decline, laugh it off or anything remotely that told him you didn’t feel the same, before he felt your soft hands slowly taking hold of his downcasted head as his eyes widened in surprise at how... content you looked with the same smile that ignited a fire deep in his soul that it never died, and would never do.. And you are a great man who is kind, strong and powerful, brave too! You are my favourite person in the whole world and I’ll spend an eternity reminding of who you are... Starting with, my boyfriend.

Silence scretchted between you two as he smiled softly at the memory, a perfect one to cast a Patronus perhaps. He desperately wished that this was one of those times you sneaked into his dorm for a nightly fate when he would for sure know that you would scare away all the demons in his head...

But unfortunately, the reality was something else. Something even more demonic and evil than the usual nightmares that haunted him.

Something that tore both him and you apart by how scary it was.

“What did you do... Regulus, did you do it?” he didn’t speak, just took your hands and put them on his sleeve, wanted you to look yourself. Because he didn’t have enough energy anymore. Suddenly, as you slowly pulled his sleeve up, the reality of what would have happened if he didn’t fight against them crashed him.

He would never see you saunter into the Great Hall every time, he wouldn’t sneak out in the middle of the night to have a late night date with you, he wouldn’t be the one to walk with you to your next class, he wouldn’t wait for you for food, he wouldn’t go to Hogsmeade and look at you as you begged to have some more candy from Honey &Dukes, he wouldn’t watch as yougot embrassed cutely...

He wouldn’t be there to love you, and you wouldn’t be there to love him.

You took a sharp intake of breath as you felt his skin over his dress shirt, as if somehow, you would feel the dark tint of the skull and snake symbol over his forearm. You would never judge him, never dare to do such thing. How could you, when you knew how much pain he would have to endure for it, knowing how much it would hurt him?

If that happened, if he yielded and accepted-or rather forced to- you would surely feel helpless and scared, for him. But then, there would absolutely be nothing stopping you from taking him to safety, and possibly going apeshit crazy at them for doing something, something he didn’t want to, on him.

“I just... I just wanted to be enough, for them t-to just... love us.” Your heart broke as stray tears escaped your eyes at how broken he sounded, how even amidst his pain, he still cated for his brother. Regulus took your silence and gasp as a bad sign, he murmured sadly with his eyes downcasted once more as he rubbed your tender flesh. He already felt like a total douchebag, including the voice that screamed at him that he was just like his family with you crying in front of him and him not being able to do anything, that he didn’t deserve anything good in life. And your soft cries didn’t help how he already felt helpless either.

“Don’t cry, love... I know that’s stupid but-“

“No it's no... Not if it’s making you feel like this...” you murmured as you took his hand between yours, squeezing his elegant and long fingers one by one as a way to comfort him as he smiled down at you, seated on his bed as the silky green color complimented you in the best way possible. His eyes looked at your body as the light casted on you made you look ethereal and take his breath away with your beauty. He looked down at your hands as they caressed his hands and wrist comfortingly, before pulling it up to reveal... smooth skin, without any dark ink covering it.

But...

Your hands stopped at feeling a bump on his perfect skin... A bump that wasn’t to be there... Alongside with bruises and yellow-ish tints on his arm...

“T-They... They did crucio o-on you?” you stammered out as you lofted his arm closer to yourself, looking between him and the bruises he had with wide eyes.

“Bella...” he said sadly as his hands clutched your arm thight, as if his life depended on you. And in a way, it did. You were his whole life, the only thing he had, and he would be nothing without you. “She did it, later mother beat me and threw insults and crucio at me...”

“I didn’t even say anything at first... Until she included you.  How she would destroy you, ruin you since you were being a distraction to me and what was more important.” He explained as he took your hands between his and kissed them, a gesture that often left you a blushing mess, and continued. “That’s when I decided that it was enough. That all the pain she inflicted on us, on me was over. I had a life, my life... I would never let her or anyone hurt you, so I fought back and... well, you know the rest.” He mumbled shyly as he peered at you, trying to determine what the effect of his words were to you. Flushed cheeks and wide eyes? That’s something he expected. Shuffling like a cat in embrassment? Also expected, that was something you usually did with him which was another thing that he found adorable.

But what wasn’t expected was what left your mouth.

“I’ve always loved that about you...” you whispered out eith softest eye possible and this time, it was the Regulus Black who blushed.

“What do you mean?”

You shrugged your shoulders as he frowned, but upon you not looking at him and the sudden urge to hide yourself, he smirked and threw his arms around your waist to pull you against him as he nuzzled his face to your neck while your hands played with his curls. He was glad that once sad and bad vibe left to a more pleasant and happy one as he shared this moment with you, with hugging and kissing.

You giggled as the ticklish feeling his lips left on yourbskin made you groan while trying to stop him, so that you could get those words out. You loved his kisses and how they made you feel, but you had to say this... Or else it would eat you alive, and then you would be frowning the whole next day.

“I mean-hey, stop! I’m trying to be romantic here!” you swatted his hand away as it slowly slithered upwards aling the expanse of your naked back, ruhhing circles on the flesh there as he hummed. “I thought it was my thing, love?”

“Yeah, but now, I changed it! It’s mine now, you did it a lot. Now, will you please listen, my pretty and handsome boyfriend?”

“Hmm... Gotta think, love... Maybe after a kiss?” he wiggled his brows playfully as you rolled your eyes but did so, smiling into the soft and lingering kiss you both shared.

Ugh, this boy... Always looking for way to smooch me...

“Now that you had your kiss,” you said after being parted from him, panting at the intensity of the kiss and trying hard to not dive back at the sight of his pink and swollen lips, you continued with a finger idly rubbing his lips and then his beauty mark under his chin.

“I love your brave heart. Even if you might not think so, you have been standing up against them for so long and you, protecting me even if I wasn’t there further proves it...” you looked at him with a kind look and took his hand to place it on your chest, right where your heart was as you continued.

“I love how you always know how to make me smile, no one makes me smile the way you do, my days better and surprise me. I love how you always seem like you don’t care but actually listen when there is something we, any of us, want or when something is bothering us.”

“I love how thoughtful you are, even when it breaks you... Just like how when Sirius left home, and you came to me crying. Not because you felt anger or hatred, which would have been understanable by the way, but rather joy. Joy, because you knew that it was a new start for him so that he could live a normal life even if it killed you.” A scoff left you in the middle of your speech  remembering how your best friend left his little brother like that but soon disappeared when you remembered how broken he was when he talked about his brother.

Regulus, though, was in shock. Because no one in his life had ever been that thoughful and attentive to the way he felt. No one really saw what was hidden behind his strong façade but yet again, you weren’t “no one” and he was always going to be understood.

From now on, and until forever.

“you don’t think I’m... broken? Bad?” he mumbled as he looked at you through his lashes, head down but still smiling. Your heart soared for the boy before you and you leant down to capture his lips with yours, but not before uttering one lost heartfelt sentence.

“All I know is that I love you, that you deserve everything good in life.”

Regulus sniffled once more as he accepted your kiss, humming happily as he allowed you to deepen it. Little shocks went through his body and he wondered if you felt it too but didn’t dwell on it more. He only accepted your unconditional love.

“I know I don’t say it out loud much, but I really do love you so much... You’re all I’ll ever need to feel better.”

“And I love you, love... So much.” You whispered silently, kissing the topnof his head as he thightened his hold on you. Everything was nice and silent once more, only the sounds from the crickets and owls reaching both of your ears. You kissed his head, his forehead and cheek contionously while he laughed, genuinely laughed since he came back, while trying to make you stop. He knew trying to physically stop you wouldn’t work, so he opted for other ways.

Like, kissing you desperately from your neck as he breathed out to tour most sensitive part of the column of your neck, gracefully out only for him to kiss, to mark.

And he wasn’t wrong. When you felt his hot lips on your neck trailing wet and fast kisses up and down your neck, you gasped and let him do as he wanted. Your legs opened for him to step between them, hovering over you with both of his hands on each side of your head as he gazed at you with love and clear desperation. At that moment, you two weren’t just two lovers who were fucking around.

You two were soulmates that understood each other on another level.

He suddenly stopped his ministrations and just looked down at you from above you for a few seconds before sighing dejectedly.

“I don’t want to live there... But I don’t know where-“

“You are not going back to that place, Regulus. Not again, I won’t allow it.” You sternly cut him as you rose up on your hands, brows knitted together while you pushed yourself up as he lowered back and looked at you as if you were crazy.

“B-but... I have nowhere else to go! They would cut me off of the tapestry and disown me! Sirius had James and-“ he exclaimed in distress as he started to shake again, shaking his head at the sudden panic of the reality and what he was supposed to do. He was so caught up in the comfort he had after so long that he had forgotten about what was waiting for him.

His mother with her wand out to use even mkre gruesome punishments, forcing him to come to their meeting and kill innocents...

He couldn’t get help if they did it, and how would his brother look at him if he were to get that damned mark? He already didn’t consider him as a brother, he would definetly refuse to have anything to do with him after he sees it.

And you? How would you accept him like that? A vicious killer who would have to work for the Dark Lord even if it was the last thing he wanted?

You wouldn’t deserve it, you wouldn’t want it, you wouldn’t love him, you wouldn’t accept him, he would be all alone and then be killed as-

“And you have me..! You could stay with me and my family, you know they would do anything to protect us.”

Your desperate call for him was what made him come back to his senses, from the panic attack he had at just thinking about the possibilities. He didn’t register what you said at first. Inside his mind, there seemed to be a constant whirl and buzzing sound as if he was fighting back against a huge storm and he was just... trying, trying and trying but failing in the end.

But it was because he tried to do it alone. He was never allowed to ask for help since it was a “sign of weakness” as his father called it, but now that he had a different circle of people, different friends and above all you, he didn’t have to fear anything.

The way Regulus broke down at the mere mention of his family house( something that was supposed to be comforting) broke you, the sight of the kind boy you knew being treated that way... You couldn’t allow it anymore. There was no way you were letting him go to that house, back into Walburga’s waiting arms as she was waiting to point that damned wand to her own son and mercilessly torture him.

And, to prevent it, a bright idea came to your mind. Sure, there was a potential that your parents would be shocked, more likely have questions as to why they were hosting the boy but thwy would understand... and hopefully help him out.

“You know how my mum adores you, they would gladly help us both.” You weren’t lying to comfort him or yourself, it was true. Last summer, when you brought him to your house after he told something about his whereabouts to his mother, he stayed with you and he would always be thankful for what you did for him that summer. Because those 3 months were the best he had in a long time. At first, when he witnessed the pure love and care there was between all of you, he felt jealous and angry.

Jealous because he didn’t have, and could never have, what you had. He felt the bitter pangs of knives every time you kissed your parents, they brought you home made meals to your room as you showed him the cool muggle books or listened to songs on your bed as you held hands and looked at each other with lovesick smiles. The way you bravely sneaked into the guest room just to fall asleep with him, to comfort him so that he didn’t feel alone changed him in a way, made him more brave.

You didn’t have to know, but your mum always checked on him during night to see if he was doing fine and smiled whemever she saw you both sleeping while hugging each other as if your lives depended on it.

But even when he was jealous of you and your parents, though never serious, he had a clear mind to judge the situation and then... he realized how they included him to their casual lifes as well, just like you did.

It was like a famy thing, huh?

How your mother requested him to come to the kitchen and later taught him how to cook some meals, tasted what she cooked and even helped her out around the house all the while listening to her talk shit about almost every family in the wizarding world, except Weasleys, with a huge smile on his face.

He could never dare to do that in his own house, but here, in your own... He was sitting with your mother on the kitchen with a cup of tea and biscuits while they talked and talked. She took after her mother, both inner and outer beauty, he would think as he gazed at the way your mum talked and even threw some praises at him here and there which didn’t fail to make him blush.

He really wanted to be a part of that life, he needed it... He had never been happier than he was at that time and to hear you say that he could be...

“I can? You... Promise?” he hopefully asked with tears in his eyes as you nodded uour head immediately, bringing him for yet another hug as you kissed his nape softly.

“Yes, I promise. You and I, forever and then even more... Remember?” he suddenly surged forward and took your face in his hands, inhaling your shampoo before diving for a passionate kiss as his hands wrapped themselves around your waist and pulled you to his lap. He poured all his love and gratitude into it, teeth clashing together as his lips and tongue desperately searched for yours.

You squealed but then moaned slightly at how hot you suddenly felt, how his movements and kiss heated you up more than normal. This kiss wasn’t normal, this side of Regulus wasn’t normal. He normally was someone who showed his love silently, who kissed you under shadows. You understood it well, he wasn’t a man who liked to show off with physcial affection and rather made his silent care work its magic.

But right now, this Regulus was fragile and sensitive, and his desperate kisses showed it too as he wanted you to... know it.

And Merlin, did you know it...

You held onto his neck and hair as your lips moved against his lips, leaning him back amd making him lay on his back as your body laid on his flush, chest to chest. The kiss was everything you both wanted, it has been so long since he deprivee both himself and you from each other but it wasn’t the time for it to lead to something more.

Not when he was so in pain, and need of comfort.

Besides, there was something else that needed to be talked about if you were doing what you were planning to do. Some people that needed to know, who would gladly move the entire universe for the boy below you

You shyly looked at him with a troubled look and Regulus’ brows knitted together as he worriedly took a hold of your face in his warm palms. “Is something wrong, my love? Was it too much?”

You looked at him in amazement, the fact that he still thought about your comfort when he was the one who needed it bedazzled you. But like you said, it was a trait you loved about him, perhaps the the best one.

You shook your head while taking a huge breath in. “No, love... It was quite... enjoyable.” You flushed under his teasing smirk, cursing at him for making you feel like a little kid being offered candy inside your mind as you cleared your throat and got off of him to sit next to where his body was now leaned back against the head of his bed. He was looking at you with confusion and slight worry, wondering ehat was on your mind as his hand wandered to your knee and rubbed it gently. To not give him any more scare any longer, you took in his glorious sight and continued.

“There are two more people who you could turn for help to.”

That was something you both talked about a lot, who he would turn to if shit went wrong and he had to act quick with his escape. You always knew that Regulus shouldn’t stay in that house even a moment longer, but he insisted that he was fine and assured you that everything was under his control with a swift kiss to your forehead.

So you kept your silence. You didn’t talk about it again until he would want to, but still... You told Sirius about the awful things they did to Regulus as he listened with clenched jaw and asked him if there was anything he could help with when the time comes.

Not if... When.

Because everyone knew that the inevitable was waiting right outside the door, and there was no stopping it.

And he of course, immediately offered himself which you declined for the time being since Regulus still believed that he hated his brother. You watched how broken he suddenly seemed after you said it but still nodded, knowing how he fucked everything up by not grabbing him with himself as he left, and gavr you their uncle’s name.

“He is a good man, also like us who didn’t believe in their ways... If there is anyone that could help, it’s him.”

Regulus tilted his head to you as if asking what you meant,  how the hell it was possible that there would be more people who could help him, and with a sigh, you looked at his eyes. “Your uncle Alphard and... Sirius.”

“No... My uncle? That’s fine. But Sirius... He hates me, love. He showed me how he felt about me! He wouldn’t want anything to do with me!” he got up from his bed hastily in panic and went to the open window as he leant over it with his hands in his hair, welcoming the fresh and cool air into his lungs.

You understood where he was coming from, knowing little pieces about how that night went between them and how he... did a lot for Sirius that night, something he didn’t know and probably would never. Some harsh words were apparently exchanged between them and even if they both knew that the other didn’t mean it...

It didn’t hurt any less.

Regulus thought that Sirius chose James over his own brother and hated him for being the way he is.

Sirius thought his little brother wad ashamed of the person he was, how he always caused trouble even as toddlers and made him get hurt even though he would mostly be the one taking the blame for him.

And you thought that the Black brothers were stupidest motherfuckers in the whole world.

Your arms fell helplessly on the bed as you watched Regulus break down, almost, again. You never felt this helpless in your life, and your gut told you that the reason of his agitation was partly because he hated himself for making you go through this, but...

You promised him one year ago that no matter what happens, you would be there for him.

Always.

“No, my love... Sirius loves you and cares about you. I know, because I listened to him as he cried in James’ house.” You walked up to him slowly, took his hand and stood before him as your hand crept up towards his sculpted face and rubbed his cheek softly before tiptoeing and kissing each side of his cheek as he smiled and exhaled slowly.

At that time, things were tense for them. So much so that it affected the school as well.  Sirius was still on edge because of his parents, worried sick for both Regulus and himself, thinking that they were planning something evil about himself. Regulus was hurt because his brother left him, for James, and even called him his “brother” which didn’t seem anything friendly to the poor, young boy who was drowning in his insecurities. It didn’t matter that he was already thinking about also running away, to you probably, but he wasn’t abandoning a brother for another one in his eyes and therefore blamed Sirius for being selfish.

But, as much as you understood both Regulus’ frustration and Sirius’ anger, you also knew that your friend and the older brother of your lover would drop everything to help his little brother out of that shithole.

“Just... Talk to him. Because I know you, you would regret not doing so if you don’t do it.” You sighed out tiredly, the later hours into the night catching up to you as you begged him softly, hoping that he would accept. A part of you feared that he wouldn’t, and tey to solve this by himself like always...

But you were his weakness, the reason he rebelled back and changed his future unknown to either one of you.

He would kill for you, die for you, live for you and turn the whole universe upside down if he had the power.

“Okay... Will you... Will you also be there? For me?” he softly smiled and kissed your nose, leaning his forehead to yours as he waited for your answer with a small smile. You smiled before kissing him deeply, slowly as your lips lingered on his and he closed his eyes slowly as if to savour this moment. You tugged him towards bed with a whine. “ Forever and always... Now, come back to bed.”

At that, a playful smirk found his face since you came in his room. “Now, I thought we could get to that lever later in our relationship, love.” You blushed heavily at how that one innocent sentence seemed so... cozy and something a married couple would say. You hid your face at the sudden flashes of you two being married, living your dreams in a cottage far way from everyone came before your eyes before punching his arm. It didn’t do anything of course, that boy was fit contrary to what people thought by his lanky figure, except making him laugh and kiss your hairline.

“You’re so adorable when you blush... Alright, let’s go and sleep.” You smiled as you watched him get under his duvet and groan in relief when he found a good position to sleep, blushing at how the expanse of his back flexed with each of his movements. You sighed in relief at seeing that he would finally fall into a comforting sleep and moved to quitely get out of his dorm when his monotone yet curious voice reached you, halting you in your steps.

“And, where do you think you are going?” he asked matter of factly as you stood there like a deer, with a hand on the doorknob as you slowly turned to look at him sitting down on his bed and laying halfway down with his torso out. “Uh... Going back to my dorm?”

“And who said you could?” he raised a brow at you questioningly as you laughed awkwardly, turning fully to him with your arms crossed in front of your chest as you looked down at him hesitated.

“I thought you would want to... be-“

“Trust me, love, being alone is the last thing I need right now... I need you...” he shyly said, his cockiness suddenly disappearing as he opened the duvet and offered you to come and sleep with him. His chuckle of disbelief made you scoff at him as you went up to him and got under it without making him repeat himself. He chuckled once more as he pulled you towards him, snuggling to you as your arms wrappes around him and soon you both fell asleep to the comforting embrace of your lover.

When he arrived in his room, he was terrified of going back to Grimmauld House and be forced to accept the Dark Lord’s way. He felt as if there was no other option for him, and he even mentally prepared himself to break up with you to save you from the tragedy. But as you slowly came back to his bed and sat down before inching closer to him and settling right next to him on the single bed, your bodies flushed together as you laid your hand on his chest, right where his heart was beating loudly, he felt hope blossom in his chest.

Even if he chuckled and tried to play the cool Regulus to hide how these all meant a lot to him

He fell asleep peacefully with you between his arms and this time, rather than those nightmares that decorated his dreams as he only saw his mother and the red hue of the cruciotus curse, he now dreamed of future.

A future where he was happy with you, in a country-side...

A future where you would be waiting for him with just as warm and soft embrace, continuing to lighten his days just as you are doing just by existing...

A future where he is safe and happy, with the family you two might create, a family that would be completely different than the one he has.

And, for the first time in 16 years, he had a good nights of smorning.yoy btoh laid under his duvet together, not caring about the teasing he would face the next morning.

[kquil]

🧁: cupcake

tell me about yourself, as much or as little as possible and i will ship you with whichever marauder i think you will go well with!

hi! congrats on 1k!! i love reading your writing <33 this is my first time requesting :))

i have lighter brown hair that has a few natural blonde highlights from the sun and blue/gray eyes. i’m about 5’3” and am really quite pale. i would describe my style to be a mix between whimsigoth and dark academia. i have 2 tattoos, one of my star sign constellation (pisces) and one of a hibiscus but i am definitely going to get a lot more. i am more on the introverted side and really appreciate my alone time but when i’m with my friends i could hang out forever (probably bc of my crippling FOMO tbh-). i love music and making playlists and i actually play the bass and sing a little. one of my major hobbies is theatre and acting- i love being on stage. i’m a slytherin but definitely have a little hufflepuff deep down. i love watching criminal minds and horror movies but also appreciate really cheesy romance movies. i have a major minor caffeine addiction- both coffee and tea. i love travelling and reading and writing occasionally. id say my love language is quality time with a little side of physical touch and maybe a little bit of words of affirmation.

anyway i think that’s about me in a nutshell ! thank you so much and once again congrats 🫶🏻 !!

Thank you for the congratulations, darling and thank you for sending in this request, i hope it’s to your liking despite it coming very very late (｡Ó﹏Ò｡)

i ship you with, Remus Lupin

i. you often ‘borrow’ remus’ fluffy and thick sweaters on especially chill days. they were so big that they swamped your frame but that was how you liked it and you liked that they fit your dark academia aesthetic too. remus doesn’t mind, but acts like you owe him for being so generous with lending out his clothing — “you’re nice and toasty because of my sweater so you should help keep me warm,” was his most common excuse but that often led to you cuddling up against his chest, between his legs and on his bed while you read separate books. it was the perfect way to spend an evening together. 

ii. compared to remus, you’re quite short but he loves that about you, especially when you’re dressed in your whimsigoth attire. he thinks you’re adorable and always has this urge to hold you to him – like you’re his own pretty fairy, small and beautiful and someone he doesn’t think he could ever live without – but doesn’t want to come across as clingy so he usually just ends up fiddling around with the fabric of your clothes. you’ve come to see the gesture as a sign that remus needed to be cuddled so whenever you feel a slight tug on your clothing, you immediately turn to cuddle up against your boyfriend.

iii. when you and remus first got together, you were quite nervous about meeting his friends, especially because you knew how close they were. But, over time and with some prompting from remus, you’ve gotten just as close with the boys as remus has; you share a lot of sweets and inside jokes with peter, you help sirius with styling his hair and clothes and james likes to ask you for advice with lily. the boys often refer to you as ‘the missus’ or ‘remus’ girl’ or their ‘sister in law’ because you were all practically family to each other. 

iv. the time remus discovered your tattoos, he was entranced by them, he thought they looked beautiful on you and he’s grown to habitually kiss them whenever you two were intimate with each other. you’ve told him how you debated getting a tattoo dedicated to him, which he blushed at. he was incredibly flattered that you would want something of him permanently on your skin. you were strongly against getting a full moon however; you didn’t want something that caused him so much grief to represent him on your body, instead, you opted for tattooing a matching scar of his onto your own body – it was a favourite of yours and perfectly placed across the upper right side of his abdomen. “Why?” he asked you in disbelief when he saw your new tattoo, tracing it with his finger gently as his other hand moved to press against the matching scar on his own body. “because i think it’s beautiful,” was your answer and ohhhh how you made him melt!

v. one summer, you and remus decided to go on holiday together for a week before the full moon and he fully got to appreciate your love for coffee. you woke up to do mornings with coffee, spent the evening with tea and remus, being the loving and observant boyfriend that he was, helped brew you tea and coffee whenever that time of the day came along. It took you one time to show him how you liked your tea and coffee for him to nail it over and over again. he’s your little barista~

vi. your holiday together was spent in an airbnb located in a countryside village, watching criminal minds, horror movies and cheesy romance films in bed together, going on long walks and reading and writing at cute cafes. It was so relaxing and you had never felt so at peace… until the marauders decided to crash the party and surprise you two with a spontaneous visit of your little get-away together. It wasn’t an unwelcome visit, in fact, you were just beginning to miss the boys and they showed up just in time. “I knew it! I knew you missed us!” james cheered and sirius laughs with his arm thrown over peter’s shoulders, the three of them grinning widely at yours and remus’ cuddled up forms.

vii. as much as remus loved having the boys around, however, he wanted to be alone with you more so he set about planning a scheme to encourage their departure without making it too obvious — his plan: to be as lovey-dovey with you as they were willing to stomach and amping it up every time.

viii. “you’re so beautiful today, my love,” remus coos into your ear before pressing a kiss against your cheek. “No no no, let me get that for, my dear,” remus insists, hurrying to open the door for you to enter as he leans his face down and smiles expectantly. with a giggle, you kiss him sweetly as thanks and enter while the boys in the background pull faces at the lovey atmosphere you two were setting. “we can share the blanket, darling,” remus calls and opens his arms so you could run up to cuddle into his chest with the blanket wrapped around both of you. you were already wearing remus’ thick sweater but cuddling with him made you feel especially warm, which was needed for the chilly night. The rest of the boys glare at the two of you, feeling especially lonely as they look on with their marshmallows over the open fire and glaring when remus looks up from kissing you and smirks at their pathetic, shivering appearance under unbearably thin blankets.   

ix. by the end of day 2, they were packing their bags. “remmy…” you sighed and narrowed your eyes at your boyfriend after the two of you waved the boys goodbye. “yes, sweetheart?” he asks, pressing a kiss to your cheek after taking a strand of your blonde hair behind your ear. “i know what you did! i didn’t know you could be so devious!” he grins as you pout, “darling, i’m a marauder too, y’know~”

1K MILESTONE EVENT : CLOSED | NAVI.

[dorianslayyy]

13 Books Tag Game

Tagged by @bubblegum-blackwood

1) The last book I read:

Iron Flame by Rebecca Yarros - I absolutely devoured this sequel, omg. Obviously it’s nothing fancy or anything like that but hey what’s wrong with a smutty YA? Not to mention DRAGONS

2) A book I recommend:

Perfume by Patrick Süskind - when I read it I had no idea it was a whole entire modern classic, I just picked it up at Oxfam for like 3 for £1 or something but, wow, I can 100% understand how it earned that status! If you like an eery not-too-long horror story with the most beautiful imagery describing some fucked up gothic storylines and a lot of social commentary, you’ll love this book!

3) A book that I couldn’t put down:

Ahhh ok, im gonna say In Memoriam by Alice Winn. The ending was… idk I wasn’t really a fan of the ending, I thought it kind of disengaged and took away from the struggles and severity of war and sexuality the rest of the book portrayed but until that point the rest of the story was everythingggg, there’s a sweet forbidden romance/coming of age/found family in the 1910’s propelling into a story of the horror of WW1 and losing everything you know. All I can really say is that I read it all in one go (more or less) and it had me laughing and sobbing throughout

4) A book I’ve read twice (or more):

I mean… there’s an obvious choice here - The Picture Of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. HOWEVER I’m going to absolutely cheat and also say Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë, the drama, the trauma, the vast majority of these characters are awful and I love it 🤌🤌

5) A book on my TBR:

So many… so so many… I’m gonna say House Of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski tho because it was expensive and it’s cool looking and I’ve actually been meaning to read that for a while but boy howdy it’s huge

6) A book I’ve put down:

The Tale Of The Body Thief by Anne Rice UGHH I’m trying so hard!! It’s so many words with so little going on, and I do enjoy it, I really do, it’s so goofy, but it’s so.. i mean verbose isn’t really quite the right word but you know what I mean. Sorry mutuals :( I just need a break to read something short and silly - which I’ve almost finished the little series I’m currently reading

7) A book on my wish list:

Prophet Song by Paul Lynch - it sounds absolutely soul crushing and miserable, I know this completely contradicts what I just said about being in the mood for a silly read but <333

8) A favorite book from childhood:

Omg 10000x the Skulduggery Pleasant series by Derek Landy, guys you don’t understand, as much as I would love to talk about how my mum and I used to sit and read Anne Of Green Gables before bed or my Enid Blyton obsession when I was like 6, Skulduggery Pleasant was my absolute jam - I must’ve read that series (the original 9 + spin offs) a million times in primary school. I did keep up with phase 2 when that was coming out but I don’t know if I’ll bother with phase 3, I’m just too old now and phase 2 wasn’t all that imo - I think it’s sort of beating a dead horse at this point :( but the original 9 and Maleficent Seven/Armageddon Outta Here were my childhood and I definitely absorbed Valkyrie Cain into my identity as a child so that series probably shaped a big part of who I am and my hobbies as an adult

9) A book you would give to a friend:

Love On The Brain by Ali Hazelwood. Silly, nerdy, fun, a cute little Pride and Prejudice-esque enemies to lovers feat. women in STEM

10) A book of poetry or lyrics that you own:

Ok so anyone who’s seen my other poetry blog @apoemadaykeepsthehoesaway knows my obsession with The Complete Poems of Wilfred Owen (I have a lot of difference versions) AHHH by far my favourite poet - as you can imagine with such a young man, you can clearly see his changing mentalities, his growth as a person and a writer, his influences, and really gather a lot of context for what’s going on with him in general through his poems. And he grew up in all the same areas I grew up in and hung around as a kid/younger teen, which I think adds to my personal interest in him too. Idk ig we’re very close friends on a parasocial level lol.

And ofc there really aren’t that many poets around that give such visceral, truthful, and emotional insights to the First World War as Owen does (also a queer icon). He was my intro to war literature and I have tattoos relating to him, he and his work are just incredible to read about, would highly recommend having a look at Siegfried Sassoon’s war poems too; another very blunt poet who was a celebrity and war protestor at the time and happened to mentor Wilfred Owen, as well as being linked with other influential folks of the time such as Robbie Ross, Stephen Tennant, Rupert Brooke, and Ivor Novello. Ok Ill move on :,)

11) A nonfiction book you own:

Surprisingly I quite like nonfiction, mainly history and essays from philosophers and the like. Speaking of, Friedrich Nietzsche’s Beyond Good And Evil is a pretty solid one I own, I’ve never read anything where the author begins by calling himself and all his coworkers socially inept incels 🥹 but even though I don’t remember the specific reason I bought it (I was reading it to argue against some other philosophers in an essay in college and I really don’t remember who or what it was) I remember it being a really interesting read

Or yknow in a more traditional sense of non-fiction, I also have Notes On A Nervous Planet by Matt Haig. Really helped me get through some stuff, if you’re struggling with anxiety or feeling a bit down lately I’d very much recommend

12) What are you currently reading:

Omg ok, The Hitchhiker Trilogy by Douglas Adams, I’m currently on book 3 of 5 - Life, The Universe, And Everything. Really silly and nonsensical space bs but somehow also a bleakly satirical social commentary on the unseriousness of our ‘serious’ world. Really enjoyable, fairly political to some degree, really short (around or less than 200 pages a book), really fun. Martin Freeman truly was the perfect casting for Arthur Dent in the film of the first book. Full of that quintessentially British cynical humour and of course plenty of cups of tea

To give a little preview, the second book literally opens “The story so far: In the beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”

13) What are you planning on reading next?

Books 4 and 5 of The Hitchhiker Trilogy, and then I suppose I had better carry on reading The Tale Of The Body Thief :D

Tagging whoever wants to have a go, it’s super fun, sorry if I went on a bit on some of these 😅

[moonheavens]

thank you for the tag sweet @tortoisebore the genius to my boy

so I do have a liked songs playlist but I need to go through bcs there's a lot of shit in there so these are from my spring 23 playlist but here's 10 songs I love rn!!

Dexter Hall by Zach Adkins - just plain and pure gut-punch-sad you know? just. ouch Between Me and You by Brandon Flowers - I love Brandon's voice sm (&I don't always love all of his The Killers stuff) and this song. like a warm blanket Babylon by David Gray - a classic!!! on my birthday we went to the pub and there was a musician doing covers and he played this and I just completely rediscovered my love for it Name by the Goo Goo Dolls - oh fuck I love this song. one of those where you just have to pause what you're doing and sit and listen to the lyrics and the vibe White Teeth by Ryan Beatty - Ryan's new album is gorgeous and this song is everything. headphones aren't enough I need to SWALLOW it No Complaints by Noah Kahan - this song goes so hard. like, the lyricism and symbolism, fuck. also I got tickets to see him live soon and I've been rejoicing!!! The Alcott (feat. Taylor Swift) by The National - I love Taylor Swift. I love The National. put them together and you've got MAGIC every damn time. this song is everything I want to drink it through a straw Save My Life by Niall Horan - fun fact Niall is my favourite artist in the whole wide world like that's my babygirl. my #1. I have a whole history with this man like don't even ask me how many times I've met him & seen him live. but. I love him and his new album is amazing Chemtrails by Lizzy McAlpine - listen I know this song is so painful and raw, okay. I know. do I still listen to it on repeat sometimes bcs it's so hauntingly beautiful? yes. do I still cry after 2983 times? also yes. You're Not The Only One by Sam Fender - I have been on a Sam Fender bender (haha) recently he's so gooooood like. he just gets me.

not tagging anyone bcs I have like 5 mutuals and they've all done it already so <3 ily all

[somethingsupwithdrac]

No letters from Jonathan, Mina, or Lucy today. :(

Poe Daily number three is here, though, and it’s another of my favourites!

The Oval Portrait is short but decidedly not sweet, although quite effective. It’s another of Poe’s “death of a beautiful woman” themed works, which pops up a lot because he thought that it was the most poetical topic in the world. We stan a gothic king.

This one inspired elements of Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray (if you have not read it, go read it, please I love it), but they’re used in a different way. You have the supernatural portrait there, but it reveals something about the subject and not the artist. Buuut I’m not here to talk about Dorian Gray, so.

I like how this is framed as an unnamed narrator who, having been injured in some way (fun fact: there was originally a slightly longer version of this story that explains exactly how but it got cut for relevance after the initial publication), holes up in an abandoned mansion in Italy with his valet. Honestly, exploring creepy old mansions and finding dark secrets therein is such a classic and fun horror trope. My favourite versions are ones like this, where the people telling the story break in, find it apparently very recently abandoned, and still go “hm, yeah, this looks like a great place to bed down/explore. Surely there is no horrifying reason it looks like the owners ran for their lives in the middle of the night.”

So we have our narrator, a bit delirious with blood loss, and his valet, making themselves at home in this great abandoned mansion, and finding himself transfixed by the paintings on the walls and the conveniently placed guidebook to them. He spends hours looking at them and reading about each one and then...one he hasn’t seen before catches his eye, almost like it’s calling to him and specifically drawing his attention to it. And of course, it’s a portrait of a beautiful young woman, so radiant and lovely as to almost seem alive, and it’s this strange lifelike quality that soon disturbs our narrator enough to go looking for its explanation in the book, and oh, boy, what an explanation it is.

She was the artist’s wife, to her own eventual misfortune, and from the very beginning of her marriage had a rival for his affections in art. There’s something very sad about all of it, truly. This: “hating only the Art which was her rival; dreading only the pallet and brushes and other untoward instruments which deprived her of the countenance of her lover” is such a great expression of her grief and frustration at always coming second to her husband’s first, greatest love, art. (I was going to say “paints such a picture” but that felt a bit on the nose.) His desire to paint a portrait of her should be an expression of his love for her, that he wants to capture her forever, but she’s still coming in second for his love, as he ends up obsessively painting day after, oblivious to the way that his single-minded fixation is sucking the life out of her, figuratively and literally. She says nothing because she loves him, despite growing weaker and more despondent with each passing day, and yet he doesn’t even notice her suffering until it’s too late because he’s too fixated on the art and not the human, and in the end she pays the price for his obsession, much to his sudden horror.

And that’s where it ends, our unnamed artist staring aghast at his painting and the corpse of his wife, with the implication that he has only realized, after that last brushstroke, that his painting Life itself into the portrait has literally drained the life from the real woman he loved. (We don’t get any further reaction from out narrator, but I think it’s safe to assume he didn’t get much sleep that night.)

There’s something to be said here about the view of the relationship between art and death and art and life, and how Poe though of poetry as the rhythmical creation of beauty in words, and the ways that idea translates into other art forms. Mostly though, there’s something to be said about the effectiveness of such a short story at creating an intensely creepy atmosphere and a shocking ending that packs a punch. 

( Also, apropos of nothing I’m just gonna say right now: Fuck Rufus Griswold, the miserable envious bastard. All my homies hate Rufus Griswold.)

[margolovescoffeeandbooks]

i hate when authors do that :/ because i feel like it just creates another stereotype that if a woman is independent and strong, they’re automatically obnoxious, mean, and rude. i love them too!! especially when they’re written well and they’re complex. that’s why i love jude so much. i really appreciated holly black actually making her morally gray, and not trying to convince us she’s an angel (though she’s definitely the good guy compared to the antagonists). she’s so complex and i love that

i’ll definitely let you know when i read addie! i might put it on my may tbr list! <3

oooh YES OF COURSE!! thank you :’) <3 so i just finished the starless sea by erin morgenstern which i loved so so much. its magical realism, and the way it’s written is definitely different to a regular fantasy novel, but it truly is so beautiful oh my god. it took me a couple chapters to get into the flow of the book, but once i did i couldn’t put it down!! the writing is really gorgeous, it’s definitely “flowery” but not in a pretentious way, if that makes sense. and all the characters are so likeable and well-written, especially the mc (he’s one of my comfort characters now). there’s a bit of romance, but it’s mostly about exploring this secret underground world (?). some people say there’s no plot, which i suppose is true, but i couldnt care less bc to me, its better without being plot-driven. it’s really magical, and i’ve highlighted so many lines. its the perfect book for people who find solace and comfort in books and stories and different realities. also!! MAGICAL DOORS!! so many magical doors. this is my top recommendation!! ik for some people it didn’t vibe with them, which is okay, but id give it a chance bc it’s amazing <3

some other recs are the night circus (by the same author), which i really loved! it’s super magical, and there’s a forbidden love romance!

oooh also stardust by neil gaiman is amazing!!!! the film is great too!! it’s pretty short and it got me out of a slump!!

some other recs (and one i’m actually reading now bc it’s spring) is the wind in the willows by kenneth grahame. it’s such a cute story!! i’m pretty sure it’s a classic, and idk it’s just super cosy and comforting and perfect for spring <3

i HAVE to recommend spells for lost things by jenna evans welch, which is one of my favourite books ever. it’s a contemporary ya romance, but it’s so well-written and meaningful. there are some pretty deep themes regarding one character and imo, they were handled really well. the romance is so so sweet, and both characters are really likeable. idk how to explain it, other than it’s just whimsical, sweet, meaningful, and sometimes poetic <3

and my last recommendation is the king in the window by adam gopnik. this is a middle grade novel(?) but i feel like the writing is maybe 14+ ?? honestly idk how to explain it but it feels different than a regular middle grade book! it’s basically about a young boy who lives in paris, and finds out about this world that’s hidden in reflections (mainly windows though). the atmosphere is so magical!! i loved the setting as well, and i think it’s just a really lovely story overall <3

omg don’t even worry about it 😭<3333 pls it’s totally okay!! i hope you’re doing good 💓💓

yeah, exactly! a woman can be all sorts of things and be strong and independent at the same time. i agree, jude's awesome. although in my opinion, when it comes to morally gray, violent women, zoya nazyalensky rules. she's one of my favourite female characters of all the time. leigh bardugo wrote her so well!

i've read the starless sea last year and i loved it! it's probably one of the most unconventional fantasy books i've ever came across? everything about it is special and magical. the atmosphere is also so cozy and comforting. it's a perfect read for autumn and winter.

i've always wanted to read it! i think i'm actually going to download it today. i'm in a mood for young adult fantasy.

i've never read any neil gaiman book. i feel quite ashamed of that. i think this one will be good to start with.

i've just checked it and it looks so cute!

this sounds great! i'm adding it to my tbr. did this author write love & gelato? the name rings a bell, but i'm not completely sure.

wow, the plot sounds really interesting! i love books set in paris so i'm definitely going to read it.

thank you for the recommendations! they're all lovely! i'm doing well, i have a school break this week. how are you?

[agrimedena-drax]

OC Tea Game 🍵

Rules: You use this picrew to create your OCs drink of choice/would like to drink/represents their aesthetic

Thank you @bloodlessheirbyjacques and @circa-specturgia for the tag!

Let's go with Quinque Lupi! ☕

~~~

Vieno

This tea represents them in several aspects. First, they love wearing black. Also their eyes have black sclera and their overall colour is gray. The other thing is the representation of Gaulia, moonberries/blueberries, which are Vieno's favourite. The constellation tea is the direct connection to their school magic, which is astral.

Devina

This is the is also the mix of her personality and aesthetic. Delicate blues and gold are her favourite colours and the colours of her magic/machines she creates. Spices and roses implicate her delicate and graceful appearance with inner strength, confidence, fierceness and pride. Devina is also a fan of spicy, aromatic goods.

Dakarai

This tea cup has many symbolism and layers. Porcelain represents his upper class status and a way of living fancily. Pink drink is probably the cause of mixing it with something stronger. Flowers also represents that "this English rose has thorns" (by Katya Diana Zamolodchikova). Butterfly is a representation of his transmutation magic and him breaking from the cocoon of his family and flying freely like butterfly.

Lech

That's him! That's my cutest, sweetest boy! This beverage is the representation of Lech's tastes and personality. He really loves sweets and milk tea and they bring nostalgia from his earliest childhood. The little hear art is a symbol of his big heart and love towards his family and friends, but also some future crushes... 😉

Nurah

The richness, the gold, she has it all! The golden around her tea cup represents that perfectly. Nurah is a gold of the Furidium (hot kingdom, with flaming suns and warm sands, that's why red), smart and beautiful princess with hard surface and soft heart. The heart not only symbolise that, but also her future crushes too...

Ferrer

In Ferrer's beverage there are also several layers of metaphor. Black cup represents his exterior, dark, little scary, quiet and even dull. But there is a delicacy and greenery peeking through. As animal handler and nature lover, his tea had to include various herbs. The green colours though is a little mystery I will share later... 💚

~~~

Those are all beverages/teas from Quinque Lupi OCs! Thank you @circa-specturgia and @bloodlessheirbyjacques for tagging me. It was a pleasure to play this game! 🖤✨

[katbrando]

[ questions are from this post, 1-10 here, 11-20 here, 21-30 here, 31-40 here ]

41-50 - PREFERENCES

💛 What are your names saved as in each other’s phones? i have him saved as "🦎dingus💜" bc i must have emojis for every contact, he has me as "Darling", simple and sweet

💛 How do you guys take your coffee/tea? Do you know how the other likes it? i can't do coffee unless it's sweetened to hell and back, he's extremely particular but i can't even tell you what he likes because the order he makes at starbucks is so long and complicated.. he's a coffee snob.. as for tea, we both like a nice hot cup of earl gray in the evening 🥰

💛 Where do you get takeout? Who usually pays? anywhere and everywhere, though we try to stay away from fast food chains for the most part.. we take turns paying tbh, sometimes we rock-paper-scissors to decide LOL, that's a common decision making tool in our relationship, as silly as it is

💛 What’s your favourite (type of) show to watch together? Do you watch on routine or set time aside to binge? we don't watch tv that much, if we're watching anything it's usually a movie because he's a movie buff, but our favorite movie genres are thrillers and dramas, he dislikes comedy movies because they usually don't align with his brand of humor (he's a bit of a snob about it, smh), and he wouldn't proudly admit it but he Adores a well-animated kid's movie, spirit is one of his top 5 films but shhh you didn't hear that from me

💛 What roles do you take on when you play games together? It can be co-op, or talk about how you play games in general. we don't game together that much, he's not really a fan of video games and i don't play them as much as i used to hfdkjsg.. but i'd Absolutely rope him into playing minecraft and animal crossing with me 🥺 his attention to detail and dedication to aesthetics means he would work very hard to make our lil world/island look as beautiful as possible

💛 How do you dress? Do you look like you match as a couple, or are your styles different? oh MAN.. we both care a lot about this, his style is very much inspired by the 70s. he's very particular about the way clothing sits on him so everything is fit as perfectly as possible, he doesn't mind blowing a lot of money on a piece he's been eyeing, and while he maintains alternative hints (his messy mullet, his nose piercing, the DIYness of his denim jacket) there's a strong undertone of sophistication. does that make sense... for ME i think my style is so eclectic and weird that i can't pin it down, i like bold patterns and vintage silhouettes, i tend to gravitate towards stuff from the 80s and 90s, but i'm also a huge fan of a big plain sweatshirt and some basic comfortable jeans, it just depends on my mood tbh.. and we Absolutely like to match as a couple, i think our styles definitely sort of meet up in a lot of ways, esp in our love of denim and dark colors.. we look hot showing up to an event in matching black turtlenecks and well-fit jackets/jeans

💛 What could you not live without? Does your partner know what it is? soda..... yes he knows and he Hates it LOL.. also a fan blowing directly on me at night, can't fall asleep without it.. he knows this too, he gets cold very easily and that's why he's always little spoon.. so i can warm him up 🥰

💛 Where do you like to be touched? Innocent or suggestively. if we're talking innocent: hands, back, shoulders, neck... suggestively, oh boy ummm: neck (again), decolletage area, hips.. i think he could touch me anywhere and i'd be like "y e s..." but literally all of this is only acceptable to me if it's him bc i'm mostly touch-repulsed, he's just unlocked that part of me 🥺 he like his arms and back touched (innocently) and turns into putty if i lay a hand on his chest, his waist, or his ass (a good spank makes him incredibly weak)

💛 Mix your favourite colours. What is the resultant colour? OOOOO he loves yellow and teal... mix those together and you get something like hex color #88b92d.. mine are lavender and maroon, mix those and you get #863871.. mix those and you get a very bland #87794f LMAO

💛 Who needs space, and who needs more attention? Do you cling together or are you loosely together? if anyone needs more space it might be me, but that's just because i get socially overwhelmed very easily.. but also he's Aware of this and can comfortably exist with me without either of us speaking :')) he's very clingy and feeds off of attention, it can be hard to keep up with sometimes tbh BUT we really do love being around each other and, because we feel Safe together, we prefer to be in that place of comfort as much as possible, if that makes sense

[cower-before-power]

Naked Attraction

Summary: A typical day in your art class turn into anything but when you’re introduced to your nude model for the week- a devastatingly gorgeous man named Levi.

Pairing: Modern AU Levi Ackerman x F!Reader

TW: Nudity, swearing, suggestive content, age gap (reader is 20, Levi is 30), dick jokes, reader is thirsty and lewds Levi hard, perhaps poorly written stuff about art and drawing because I literally know nothing haha

(minors please do not interact, just to be safe)

Link to A03 here

A/N: Hello all! This is my entry for @ghost-party’s Meet Cute Collab with my darling husband Levi. I’ve never written for him before so I was a little nervous haha, I hope I did him justice! Thank you to everyone who reads, likes, comments, and reblogs- you are all wonderful and I appreciate your support! I hope you enjoy, my sweet potatoes!

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“Morning,” Jean greets you with a crooked smile and a steaming cup of coffee. It’s the good stuff from the café by his apartment, your favourite thing to help your brain shift into creative mode. “You’re later than usual.”

You grab the cup from him, sighing as you feel the warmth bleed into your hands. “Overslept. Barely had time to get dressed and brush my teeth.”

Jean’s eyes rove over you as you sink into your chair, humming to yourself as you sip on your drink. “I can see. Do you know you’re wearing two different shoes? And I think your sweater is on inside out. Why do you still even have that ugly thing anyways?”

“Thank you for your comments,” you roll your eyes. “I know I look like a hot mess and I don’t need any words from you, Mr. I Asked The Nude Model Out And Got Shot Down.”

Jean’s ears turn red, and he shoots you a dirty look before busying himself with arranging his pencils. “Shut up.”

You snicker to yourself as you set up your own area. Last week’s model had been a soft, pretty brunette that had instantly made Jean all starry-eyed, like a teenage boy with his first crush. It was generally considered a bit taboo to ask out the nude models, but he’d thrown that aside and gone for the kill after she’d slid back into her clothes. She’d laughed and patted his cheek like he was a naughty child asking for candy before dinner. Then proceeded to walk out and climb onto the back of her boyfriend’s motorcycle (but not before making out with said boyfriend for a good 5 minutes, minimum).

Jean had been left with red cheeks and no date, and you’d been left with great blackmail material.

“I wonder who will be our victim today,” you decide to take mercy on your poor friend and change the subject. “Most likely a guy, since we had a woman last week.”

“We’ll know in about 5 minutes,” Jean looks up at the clock on the wall. “Old Cueball is never late.”

Sure enough, in exactly 5 minutes your very bald and very punctual professor casually strolls through the door. A short man in a green coat is following him, presumably your newest subject. You crane your neck, trying to get a better look at his face, but all you can see is dark hair falling like a curtain over pale skin.

“Good morning class,” Professor Pyxis greets you, tossing his briefcase down on his desk with his usual nonchalant air. “I see you are all ready, so let’s get right to it.” He gestures to the person beside him. “This is Mr. Levi Ackerman. He’s your model for the week.”

The class murmurs in curiosity as the mentioned Levi Ackerman turns to face the room.

You swear your heart actually skips a beat.

Steel gray eyes observe the room from a face that practically begs to be immortalized through art. Every line is hard and strong, covered in clear skin that looks like it would slide under your fingers like the smoothest silk. Your eyes drink in his features greedily, from the regal bridge of his nose to the proud edge of his jaw. You decide your favorite thing though, is his cheeks. They are utterly cherubic, round and full and dusted ever so lightly with the lightest shade of pink.

He’s possibly the prettiest man you have ever seen.

“Hey, I know him,” Jean whispers, cutting off your entranced thoughts. “That’s Mikasa’s distant cousin, the one I told you she found on Ancestry.com last year. I’ve met him once, he’s got a stick so far up his butt, he’d need surgery to remove it. Never would have pegged him for the type to do this sort of thing.”

You vaguely remember a previous conversation involving Jean’s childhood friend and some long lost relatives.

“He doesn’t look that uptight,” you muse, too busy admiring the way his lips glint temptingly under the fluorescents to really process Jean’s words. “He’s beautiful, like something out of a Renaissance painting.”

Jean opens his mouth to reply, but Pyxis begins to speak.

“As usual, draw whichever side of him is facing you, all angles will be graded equally,” your professor plops himself down in his chair, already scrolling through his phone to find the playlist for the day. “Completed drawings to be submitted to me by the end of class on Friday. Please remember be respectful and courteous to our guest. Mr. Ackerman, whenever you’re ready.”

The man nods to your professor, already slipping out of his coat as he steps up onto the platform in the center of the room. You watch, mesmerized, as he proceeds to shed himself of his clothes. It’s rigid and methodical (he folds his clothes like he’s worked his whole life in a department store), but somehow oddly endearing. Every inch of his body that is revealed is consumed eagerly by your shameless stare, and you sincerely hope you don’t start drooling. By the time he carefully removes his final items, you feel like you are vibrating in your seat.

Holy fucking shit, he’s built like a god. Like Michelangelo himself carved him out of a block of the most pristine marble. You trace your gaze down the column of his throat, over the strong shoulders and sinewy arms, the impressive set of abs, the thighs that look like they could crush your head and you’d be nothing but happy about it. It takes a minute before you’re able to make yourself look between his thighs, and when you finally do, you have to looks away immediately. Good grief, even that is stupidly handsome. You can’t help but wonder if it would feel as nice as it looks.

Your face heats from your lewd thoughts, and you grip your pencil so hard it almost snaps. Beside you, Jean snickers.

“You okay over there? It looks like you’re about to explode.”

“Can it,” you hiss, glad that the ambient music Pyxis chose will probably keep your conversation private. “I can’t help it that I’m looking at the most gorgeous dick attached to the most gorgeous man I think I’ve ever seen.”

“You haven’t seen mine.”

“I don’t own a microscope.”

“Ooooh, see if I buy you coffee tomorrow, bitch.”

You stick your tongue out at him before turning back to your easel. As you move, you catch the gaze of Levi, his expression unreadable. Warmth creeps up the back of you neck, and you duck behind your sketchpad in embarrassment. You seriously hope he didn’t hear you, he’d probably report you to Pyxis for being creepy. You decide to lock all your stupid horny thoughts deep within the recesses of your mind, and take a few deep breaths to clear your head.

It works, and as you touch pencil to paper, the desire to create overflows inside of you.

Unsurprisingly, you become utterly engrossed in your work, your pencil sweeping over the pad with almost a mind of it’s own. Levi is the perfect model; you swear he’s not even breathing as he majestically hold his pose without even a quiver. The contours of his body spring to life on the page, and you can’t stop the joyful smile that blooms on your lips as you work. It’s times like these, when everything is so perfect, that you truly realize just how much you love making art.

Before you know it, Pyxis announces class is over, and you’ll resume with Levi tomorrow. The man of the hour begins to re-dress as your fellow classmates pack up their supplies and file out. You absent mindedly wave to Jean, who is practically sprinting out the door so he can make his next class all the way across campus. You’re still engrossed in your drawing, staring at it with critical eyes. It good, one of the best starts you’ve had all year, but now that the high of creating has worn off, you can see where you need to improve.

“You’re very good.”

You gasp and jump, whirling around to find Levi standing behind you, eyes fixed on your sketch. How did he even get there? You hadn’t seen him or heard him.

“Oh, uh, Mr Ackerman!” You squeak, your heart racing like you’ve just run a marathon.  “T-that’s very nice, I mean, thank- thank you very much!”

“It’s Levi,” your muse says, seemingly unbothered by your stammering. “Yours is going to be the best one here.”

You blink stupidly at his bold statement. “Did you look at all of them?”

“No,” Levi’s voice is firm, a tone that brokers no argument. “But you had the most joy on your face while you worked. That much passion doesn’t churn out stuff that looks like shit.”

“Oh, that’s only because you are such a great model,” you gush, insides turning warm at his praise. “You stayed so still and you looked so damn regal and you’re just so pretty and-” Your eyes go wide as you realize the absolute words vomit leaving your mouth, mortification slithering up your spine.

“I’m pretty?” Levi raises an eyebrow. “You think I’m pretty?”

“No!” You shout, and the man’s other eyebrow joins the first. “No wait, yes! I mean, fuck, I mean you are probably the most handsome man I’ve ever seen!”

Levi’s eyebrows have now practically become one with his hairline. You wring your hands, wishing the floor would just open up and swallow you. “I-well- come on, people must tell you how good looking you are! I can’t be the first.”

“No, but you certainly are the most enthusiastic about it,” Levi deadpans.

Oh, someone just put you out of your misery now.

“I’m sorry,” you offer, cringing internally at your complete ineptitude to hold a conversation with an attractive man. “I....get carried away sometimes.”

“It’s fine,” Levi’s stoic expression softens just a little. “It’s kind of nice to hear, actually. Usually I’m told I’m good looking, but ‘far too short’.”

“That’s bullshit.” you say vehemently, honestly shocked people would deny this man his godhood over something as trivial as height. “Who cares if you’re shorter? It doesn’t detract from you. What’s that phrase again? Good things come in small packages? Well, not that you’re small, I’m not saying that, I just meant-”

“Yes, you did seem to find my package....good,” Levi interrupts, and you swear you see the corners of his lips twitch upwards.

Your eyes widen in horror as your brain replays your hushed conversation with Jean. “You heard that?!”

“I’m told I have exceptionally good hearing.”

“Oh fuck me,” you groan, burying your face in your hands. “I am literally so, so, sorry. That was completely out of line. I have no excuse other than it’s clearly been too long since I’ve gotten some, but that’s no reason to make you uncomfortable. Please, if there’s anything I can do to to make it up to you, I’ll do it!”

“Have tea with me.””

Your head shoots up, surprise coloring your features. “What?”

“Tch, you heard me,” Levi tuts, reaching into his coat pocket and pulling out his phone. “I haven’t got free time till Saturday-stupid Shitty Glasses wanting to trade shifts-but if you want to go out, give me your number and we can work out the details.”

You stare at him with your mouth open, unsure if this is really happening or you’re vividly daydreaming again.

“Umm, are you sure?” You ask, wondering if you should pinch yourself to see if you are indeed imagining things. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m wearing two different shoes and my sweater is inside out. Believe me when I say these sorts of fashion statements happen more often than not. Plus, I practically salivated over you like some sort of horny middle aged suburban housewife who hasn’t been laid in years.” You pause to take a breath, once again unable to stop the words from spewing forth like a fountain. “And I’m so awkward! I mean, are you comfortable in this conversation? And I can’t stop talking once I’ve gotten going, and I say the weirdest shit, and, and-”

“I like you,” he says simply, as if he’s just declared something as obvious as 1+1=2. “I couldn’t give a flying fuck about all the stuff you just said, you’re just... you, and I like it. So, do you want to go on a date or not?”

“O-oh,” you suddenly feel shy, your tummy filling with butterflies at the look of sincerity on his handsome face. You’d never met anyone quite like Levi Ackerman before, and you weren’t about to pass up the opportunity to get to know the man behind the drool-worthy muscles.  “Uh, yes, please, I would like that. Very much.”

An almost relieved expression crosses Levi’s face, and he hands you his phone to type in your number. You notice the time as you do so, and sigh sadly as you hand him his device back.

“Well I better go,” you say reluctantly, suddenly fervently wishing it was Saturday already. “I’ve got another class in 15 minutes.”

“I’ll walk you there,” Levi says briskly, slipping his phone back into his coat. “To make sure you get there safely. Someone might murder you on account of their eyes being assaulted by that garish sweater. ” The corners of his lips twitch upwards once again, and you grow warm all over, from both his gentle teasing and the knowledge he isn’t quite ready to say goodbye yet either.

“Excuse me, I thought you said you didn’t give a ‘flying fuck’ about my attire,” you huff, but you’re grinning as you quickly pack up your bag.

“I don’t care it’s inside out, but you have to know that is the ugliest fucking color know to man,” Levi says, holding out his hand. Your brain malfunctions slightly for a moment, until you realize he’s offering to carry your bag for you. The butterflies inside you whip themselves into a frenzy as you pass him your stuff, your hand just grazing over his. Handsome, funny, honest, and sweet? How is this guy even real?

“I’ll have you know, this sweater is an absolute delight. When it’s inside right,” you stick up your nose, but unable to stop he laugh that slips past your lips.

Levi rolls his eyes in an almost playful manner. “Doubtful .”

You’re not sure where it comes from, but a sudden rush of confidence fills you. “If you’re so offended by it, maybe you should just rip it off of me.”

The tips of Levi’s ears turn a delightful shade of pink. You’re sure your own skin is hot enough to cook an egg on.

“Wear it Saturday then,” Levi’s ears may be flushed, but his eyes flash with something that makes your spine tingle. The insinuation of his words has your gut clenching and your mind whispering fervent prayers to please please please make Saturday get here faster, I don’t ask for much, please!

“Only if you wear your modeling outfit,” you manage to say, trying your best to sound coy when you feel like you might combust into a pile of lust and giddiness. “I’ve never seen someone wear it so well, and I want a closer look.”

If possible, Levi’s eyes grow even darker, and you just know Saturday is going to be one of the best damn days of your entire life.

“Deal.”

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Taglist: @clovertitan @millenialfanfictionaddiction @stigandr-the-cat @axoxtxhxh @bowandcurtsey​ @chaotic-nick​ @manjiroarchiviste​

[world-of-aus]

For the gif and drabble, I was thinking maybe a Royal au? Where Bucky and the reader have an arranged marriage and they get to know each other after they've been married? Can Natasha also be the reader's best friend? Prince!Bucky is one of my favourites. Just something really fluffy

Lexi, thank you for participating in WorldOfAUs loves you 3000!

I had a lot of fun writing out your drabble and I hope you enjoy this royal! AU as much as i enjoyed writing it for you!

ENJOYED THIS WORK? ALL OTHER WORK CAN BE FOUND IN MY BIO ON MY MASTERLIST!

Bare feet touched cold wooden floors, a shiver rolling through your sheer nightgown covered body as you slowly moved the warm duvet from over your legs. Your feet stilled; breath caught in your throat as the man next to you stirred fingers barely brushing your backside as he turned to you, you glanced over your shoulder eyes wide as you took in his still sleeping form.

He was beautiful.

He was beautiful from the depth of his oceanic eyes, to the gentle expressions of his voice. He was beautiful from his generous opinions, to the touch of his hand upon your own as you walked the castles corridors in the dead of night. You loved the way his voice quickened with excitement when a new idea presented itself before the council, or when he was enjoying one of yours so much so that he lost himself for a moment and forgot the mask he was meant to wear in front of others.

What he is, what he was, is what is beautiful about him, and that beauty came from deep within.

You can’t help but to lean over, tender fingers tucking away the chestnut brown hair that threatens to conceal his face before your moving back, your legs pushing you up and off the warmth of the bed.

You go quietly, hands finding his finest silk robe to throw over you form, chills rolling through your body as you go on quiet feet to the awaiting French doors.

Your head is angled toward his still sleeping form as your fingers wrap around the ice-cold knobs, twisting ever so slowly as you watch with baited breath. Your eyes slip shut, teeth finding your lip as the knob clicks, hands pulling the doors open just as slow.

Your escape out onto the balcony comes much quicker, not wanting to alert your sleeping husband of your absence in the warmth of your shared bed.

Cool wind knocks into you as you move forward, hands bracing against the balcony, eyes already set out on the distance waiting. You don’t have to wait long as the sunrise brings you copper hues, golden light dribbling over the land like honey poured over your morning oatmeal. The leaves shimmered like a mirror flecked mosaic and the morning dew sparkled on the bejeweled grass. In a moment, your cast in crimson, rosy glow, your fingers moving through the air that grows brighter with each passing moment until it becomes a new bold day. Even with the beginnings of winter upon you, you feel the promise of a gentle spring.

“You know I'm beginning to think there’s not a day that passes us that I won’t find you here soaking in those first rays of light,” comes his sleep laced voice.

Your eyes meet the sparkling hues of blue, a small smile kissing your lips as you look back out to the land "it's beautiful, isn’t it?”

You can picture him pressed up against the doors, strong arms crossed over an even broader chest, “it is beautiful,” he murmurs, your eyes lock with his, “but the sunrise doesn’t quite compare to you.”

Warmth crawls up your neck settling into the apples of your cheeks, eyes averting his to set your sights back to the growing sunrise. A deep chuckle rises from his chest, and you sense him drawing close, his arms circling your form seconds later confirming your thoughts, “it's been a year since we wed, how do I still manage to make my queen get so flustered?”

The fluster settles, simmers as you let yourself lean into him, your hands covering his own as your head finds its place against his shoulder.

“You know I'm beginning to think there's not a day that passes us that you won’t find a reason to have me boost you’re already inflated ego my love,” you tease.

His chest rumbles beneath your back, as he presses a warm kiss to the side of your head, “Is it a crime for a man as lucky as I to want to hear what his beloved really thinks of him?”

A smile pulls at your lips as you look up to the man behind you, his eyes already on yours waiting, “no, it isn’t,” you answer, “but to be fair when father announced that he would be giving my hand away to the son of the infamous late George Barnes, I - well I had my concerns, but you already knew that.”

Bucky grins against the side of you head, “to be fair,” he teases, “I’m sure everyone knew of the concerns you held petal, you weren’t exactly the welcoming committee when your father first brought us together.”

Embarrassment filled with regret floods you, soft laughter bubbling up your chest as you recall the first words you had ever spoken in front of your husband.

“I would rather marry the stable boy father!”

Your father turns to you red-faced and glaring, “Daughter that is no way to speak in front of our guests much less to your future king apologize at once!”

Your eyes met the stormy ocean grays, “I apologize for my preference of wedding our stable boy than the likes of a man like you, but you’re no king.”

Your father clambers to his feet voice booming as he looks down on you, “now that is quite enough,” he growls, “that is no way to speak to your future husband, you will apologize at once and the right way if you wish to continue to see outside of that damned room of yours!”

Your eyes turn to slits, hands pushing you from the pleated chair that was placed next your fathers throne, “it’s not like you let me outside of my corridors to begin with father,” you hiss, “and I’m sorry to disappoint but go ahead and lock me away hell I’ll throw the key for you, because I refuse to marry a man who carries the blood of innocents on his hands.”

“Has your view on me changed petal?”

You find yourself turning in his hold then, hands falling to his shoulders as you look up the man you’ve given your heart to.

“My only regret was letting the whispered words of others build a hate in my heart for a man who never existed,” you answer. Your hands brushes against his cheek then, fingers tucking those soft locks, “for a man who had lived in the shadow of his father.”

He turns his head lips pressing to the inside of your palm, “and to think it only took a year,” he murmurs against your skin, grin pressed there as his eyes meet yours.

A grin of your own mirrors his, “it was less than a year.”

His grin grows hand finding your waist as he pulls you closer, “what was that darling I don’t think I heard you right,” he teases.

“Insufferable,” you huff through a laugh, fingers curling around the base of his neck, “but if you must know,” you exasperate, “it took less than the year to let myself fall.”

Bucky whistles lowly, “it took you less than a year to fall for the likes of a man like me, who would of thought, surely not your stable boy.”

That draws laughter from both of you, your fingers curling the hair that lays on the nape of his neck, “there was never a stable boy, but there was Tasha, though I don’t think she could quite compare.”

His head finds yours, “you’ve gone sweet on me petal.”

Your fingers curl further bringing your husband closer your lips barely touching his, “to be fair we’ve both gone sweet haven’t we love?”

“You’re not wrong there darling say, why don’t let you let me show you just how sweet I am for you?”

Your lips mold to his, the world around you melting away except for the two of you standing in the the blush of scarlet sky, and the warmth of tangerine.

Though your marriage was was not written in the eyes of one another the first day the two of you met. The two of you still existed as if the universe had brought together your two souls that were seemingly already betrothed from the very first day.

[lovely-keii]

Haikyuu Boys as Songs From My Playlist

Karasuno

Sugawara Koushi - We & Us (Moira Dela Torre)

I'll hold your hand and wipe your tears We'll laugh until we run out of years So no matter if our blue skies turn to gray There's a ray of sun that's bound to light our way

It was tiring and busy but it was fun and sweet. You were growing, changing, and you were afraid. Just a little bit, but still afraid. But he’s there. Suga has you and you have him and what can break a bond like you two? Not the galaxies, not the eclipses, not the universes. It was just you two, but you two were happy.

Nishinoya Yuu -  Lost Without You (Freya Ridings)

To love someone so much To have no control You said, "I want to see the world" And I said, "Go"

Nishinoya was like the wind. So fast, so quick, so beautiful. You need him but he goes so quickly. You could never hold him down, he wants to travel, to explore, to enjoy. But you, you wanted something else. So you let him go. You let him go with a wave and a goodbye. Now you were lost and you didn’t have your best explorer anymore.

Yamaguchi Tadashi - Favorite Ex (Masie Peters)

You were my best nights and worst fights And couldn't care less You were my gold rush to cold touch Favourite ex

You should hate him, you really should. But how could you ever hate him? He was Yamaguchi, the love that held together your Earth. The largest source of light when it was dark. The cherry on the cake but the cherry was always the first to go. Everyone wants the cherry, but one cherry is good for one person only. But still, Yamaguchi was the favorite ex if you could have a favorite ex. He was the best and the worst, so he was all you needed until he wasn’t.

Tsukishima Kei - feelings are fatal (mxmtoon)

I need it to stop And I want to be able To open up but, My feelings are fatal

He could never really open up. He wants to, he does, but he can’t. He’s just going to hope that you’re willing to hold on to him even when it seems like he cant do the same, because he does, he just doesn’t know how to.

Kageyama Tobio - Love is Gone (SLANDER, Dylan Matthew)

I'm sorry, don't leave me, I want you here with me I know that your love is gone I can't breathe, I'm so weak, I know this isn't easy Don't tell me that your love is gone

He knows that you’re trying so hard but a person can only take so much. So he’s going to make it better. He’s going to do anything and everything for you because he does love you. Just give him another chance and some more time. Just a little bit more, he can make it up to you.

Hinata Shoyo - Still Into You (Paramore)

I should be over all the butterflies but I'm into you, I'm into you And even baby our worst nights I'm into you, I'm into you Let 'em wonder how we got this far, 'Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Love was exciting, but being in love was a thrill. It was a beautiful thing, when you’re loved and you love. It’s like that with Hinata, love is a beautiful summer heat, when the year is at it’s peak. When all the fun comes out and the happiness crowds.

Nekoma

Kuroo Tetsurou - Dear Future Husband (Meghan Trainor)

Dear future husband Here's a few things you need to know if You wanna be my one and only all my life

Kuroo was the single most amazing man you knew, but no one was perfect. So you decided to compile a small list of things he needs to remember. Just a small list, nothing to special. I mean, he should know the way to your heart if he wants it that bad. Nothing like a map to precious treasure.

Kenma Kozume - If the World Was Ending (JP Saxe ft. Julia Michaels)

But if the world was ending, you'd come over, right? You'd come over and you'd stay the night Would you love me for the hell of it, all our fears would be irrelevant If the world was ending, you'd come over, right? The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight And there wouldn't be a reason why, we won’t even have to say goodbye If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?

He was doing well, he was. He knows how to stop talking to you, but he didn’t quite know how to stop wanting to. So he wants to know, when the impossible becomes possible and the world flips around, if you’d come visit him. He wants to know if you want the last thing you see to be his smiling face, slowly pulling you in for an embrace, because he knows he’d like to see you. He knows he’d want the last thing for him to see when the world ends is your soft smile.

Lev Haiba -  Boys Like You (Anna Clendening)

Momma said there'd be boys like you Too good to be true, doing what you do, best Taking me for a ride, telling me pretty little lies But for you, for you, for you, I'll take that risk

Lev seemed to be like other guys; loud, playful, and rowdy. But he was also nice, sweet, and endearing. It’s a risk you’re not to sure about. Something like a sweet but bitter candy, something that sounds good but you weren’t too sure about. But maybe, Lev was different. Maybe he wouldn’t hurt you because he’s Lev. He could still be different.

Aoba Johsai

Oikawa Tooru - Leaves (Ben & Ben)

Leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees And all will be alright in time From waves overgrown come the calmest of seas And all will be alright in time

It’s going to be okay. After moving to Brazil to pursue his dreams, you were left alone. He called you, tried to make it right. You knew that things were going to be okay but you knew that you wouldn’t be able to love until you let go of the anger. But what matters is that you try to forgive him. And in time, you know you will.

Iwaizumi Hajime - Just a Friend to You (Meghan Trainor)

Cause friends don't do the things we do Everybody knows you love me too Tryna be careful with the words I use I say it cause I'm dying to I'm so much more than just a friend to you

He knows it, you know it, heck even Kindaichi knows it. Iwaizumi Hajime has a crush on you. He might even love you. And everyone knows that you feel the same way. So why does he keep insisting you’re just friends? Because everyone knows he likes you too.

Shiratorizawa

Tendou Satori - 18 (One Direction)

I have loved you since we were 18 Long before we both thought the same thing To be loved and to be in love All I can do is say that these arms Are made for holding you

Tendou wasn’t the happiest or the brightest, but he’d try to look it. He’ll try to be happy but sometimes he just can’t be happy. That’s where you come in. You make him feel so happy, so reassured and trusted, and that’s why he loves you. Your love was the best thing he’s known and it shows. 

Ushijima Wakatoshi - Can’t Help Falling in Love - Elvis Presley

Like a river flows, surely to the sea Darling, so it goes Some things are meant to be Take my hand, take my whole life too For I can't help falling in love with you

He never believed in soulmates or true love, in all honestly, he’s never been bothered to think about those things. But ever since you came into his life, you’d managed to sneak your way into the deep crevices of his heart. And now, he finds himself with flowers, your favorite sweets, and a small velvet box in his pocket.

Inarizaki

Miya Atsumu - There’s No Way (Lauv ft. Julia Michaels)

There's no way that it's not going there Every second with you I want another But maybe we can hold off one sec So we can keep this tension in check But there's no way that it's not going there With the way that we're looking at each other

You had a crush on your best friend. And that best friend is no other than Miya Atsumu. Of course, out of every single guy in the world, it’s him you had to fall for. But you knew that he liked you too, but why couldn’t you just tell him. You knew that he liked you and he knew that you liked him, but it’s not that easy.

Miya Osamu - Somebody to You (The Vamps)

Everybody's tryna be a billionaire But every time I look at you, I just don't care 'Cause all I wanna be, yeah, all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah Is somebody to you

Dreams were supposed to be hard to reach, a heavy weight, a struggle, but he just wanted you. He looks at you and he knows, sometimes dreams could be simple. a life with you is all he needs to live. You and him, with you smiling your carefree smiles at him. A life you could both be happy in, that’s all he wants.

Kita Shinsuke - Just Say You Won’t Let Go (James Arthur)

I'm so in love with you And I hope you know Darling, your love is more than worth its weight in gold We've come so far, my dear Look how we've grown And I wanna stay with you until we're grey and old

Kita was always simple and steady, living by habit and practice. But his love for you was simple in the most intricate way. He just needed you to be happy as he is too. He just wants to spend the rest of his life with you and that’s what he’s going to try to do. Because even holding your hand makes him happy. To settle down with you, that’s all he needs.

Fukurodani

Akaashi Keiji - I Want to Write You a Song (One Direction)

I want to write you a song One that's beautiful as you are sweet With just a hint of pain For the feeling that I get when you are gone I want to write you a song

You were the most important thing in the world. To him, you were beauty, you were love, you were the simple morning melody the birds sang. You were everything he needed to be happy. He wants to return that to you, to make you feel the same way you make him feel. Because you deserve to hear the music you play in his heart. So he’ll write you one, two, or a million letters just to tell you.

Bokuto Koutarou - Saturday Nights (Khalid)

I guess there's certain dreams that you gotta keep 'Cause they'll only know what you let 'em see And all the things that I know That your parents don't They don't care like I do Nowhere like I do

Even when you feel sad or happy, Bokuto is there. He’s always going to be there for you no matter what’s wrong. And all the ideas and thoughts that you’ve closed off, he’s there to listen to them. He’ll listen to the most absurd or the most boring ones. Because it’s you. If it’s you, he’ll listen. If it’s you, he has time. That’s just Bokuto. He loves even when there’s no more love left to give.

Others

Sakusa Kiyoomi - Perfect For Me (Justin Timberlake)

Whoever made your smile made it to get in my way And every time you laugh you make that little sound It's just the hardest thing to love you but not know how So I spend all my nights in the dark and afraid 'Cause I've tried to forget you but these things just don't go away

Sakusa Kiyoomi barely knew how to love, so he most definitely did not know how to show it. He knows you crave love, affection, time, something he couldn’t give you. So he tries to push you away, but he can’t find it in himself to do so. So he just watches as you keep smiling and loving him, expecting nothing in return. Because he loves you, and though he can’t show it, you most certainly know it.

Terushima Yuuji - cliché (mxmtoon)

And that's what we were, a simple cliché It wasn't made to work, but I wouldn't have it any other way You were so witty and so charming, swept me off my feet You made me laugh you made me blush, no one could compete

You knew better than this. You knew that things like this weren’t real, simply too good for anything other than fiction. And yet, you went with it. You still loved him and it seemed like he loved you too. So you know what? You’ll just give the cliché the benefit of the doubt because even though it was too good to be true, it was good nonetheless.

[nanagoswife]

Please Don't Go. - Chapter 15

Summary: Obi-Wan finally meets Aldoken.

W/C: 4.2k

Warnings: angst

A/N: we have reached the chapter where I mention something from Master and Apprentice by Claudia Gray. It isn't really huge, but it's there.

- - -

“How was that to start this off?” you asked with a sweet smile.

“It actually gave me more confidence. Even though I know you hadn’t planned that, thank you.” His smile was genuine as he looked down at you.

“Time to meet your son,” you say quietly, slowly leaning towards his lips. “Our son,” you finished before briefly pressing your lips to his.

All he did was nod, slightly afraid to speak now that this was really happening. Never in his life did he think he would ever have a family, a child. Until he met you, he never dreamed of things like that. For the first twenty-four years of his life, he thought the closest he would ever get was having a padawan of his own.

That thought was quickly dashed when he met you nearly fourteen years ago. Since then, he wished to bring that, not only for himself, but for you. As he stands here now, looking at you as you say your farewell to Cody, he’s mad at himself.

There was no way to tell how much pain he caused you over these years. And on top of that, he left you to raise their child alone. In a way, it wasn’t his fault, but it really was. Had he kept the promise he made to you, this wouldn’t have been happening. Instead, he would’ve been by your side and greeting Aldoken with warmth instead of hesitance. He would’ve been there, holding your hand as you had given birth to him. The years would’ve been happier with all of you as a family. Together.

Obi-Wan didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve you or the right to be introduced to his son. He didn’t deserve your unending kindness and love that never faltered. Why, after all he’s done, did anyone take him back?

His thoughts were pushed away when he heard you calling out to Aldoken after having a brief chat with Padmé. He watched as the boy easily came running into your arms when you knelt down onto the floor. As he hugged you, Padmé had said her goodbye.

“Guess what?” you say, pulling away so that you could look at your little boy.

“What?” he replied with his usual happy tone. He giggled when you brought a hand up to brush his fringe back.

As he watched, Obi-Wan couldn’t help but think how overwhelmingly Aldoken looked like him. He could see as many of your features in him as he could see his, but there’s no mistaking who the father is. Even if people like Cody, Padmé and Anakin had not known about the two of you, they would be able to figure it out in a heartbeat.

Playfully, you pinched Aldoken’s cheek which caused more giggles to erupt in the silent room.

“I have a little surprise. Can you do what Anakin taught you and find out?” Like you did with Cody, you angled your son just enough that, unless he took his attention away from you, he could easily see Obi-Wan standing not far away.

Aldoken’s expression became serious when he nodded. Closing his eyes, he reached out through the force so that he could determine what you meant.

For a moment, you let your gaze fall on Obi-Wan. There was a look of wonderment across his face. It was almost like he hadn’t realized that his son would also be force sensitive. There was a small smirk that was pulling at the corner of his lips as he must’ve felt Aldoken’s energy brush against his.

The boy’s eyes shot open and he immediately turned his head to look at Obi-Wan. This is where Obi-Wan wasn’t sure if he was going to laugh in pure joy, or burst into tears at possible rejection. It didn’t get any better as his son only looked at him for a few moments.

The uncertainty started to build as Aldoken walked away from you and, almost cautiously, walked towards Obi-Wan. He could tell that the boy was piecing something together, like he couldn’t believe that he was no longer only looking at a holo.

Then, his expression changed as the realization hit him. He was no longer looking at a holo.

“Daddy?” he said, in the softest, most innocent questioning voice Obi-Wan had ever heard.

Tears of joy were building up as he trembled and, in a breath, replied, “Yes.”

Aldoken smiled, large, and ran the last few meters to his father. Obi-Wan bent down and lifted the boy into his arms. He gripped him tight as he felt as the boy’s legs did their best to wrap around him.

As he exhaled, his breath shuddered as so much was running through his mind. You looked on at the pair and started to tear up. This was a moment that was long overdue; a moment that, for a while, you thought would never happen.

Obi-Wan caught your gaze and smiled. Maybe now he could set things right. Provide you with the life that he cruelly ripped away. Maybe, you would have him back the way it was the day he proposed.

When he thought of that, it was only then that he realized that you still wore the necklace. Had you been wearing it the whole time? Or had you only just recently put it back on?

None of that mattered, though. Not when he was holding his son who seemed to be grappling to him with as much emotion as he was. His small head was pressed into the crook of his neck, fluttering eyelashes gently tickling the skin there.

Usually, he’d chuckle at the sensation. Right now, it was something he never wanted to part with. Obi-Wan basked in the feeling.

Aldoken suddenly bolted up to look at Obi-Wan, a giant smile on his face as his own bright blue eyes couldn’t decide which one of Obi-Wan’s to settle on. His tiny hands were planted on top of both sides of his collarbone.

Carefully, Aldoken brought one hand up to rest a hand on Obi-Wan’s cheek. It was something he was doing to both help make the final tie of the bond with his father, but it was also to feel the coarse hairs there. He had always been fascinated with facial hair, but hardly any of the clones he knew well had it. Cody would always let him play with his hair, but that wasn’t the same.

He giggled lightly, just like you had when you first ran your fingers through his scruff. It warmed his heart as he felt the small hand. Aldoken brought it up so that he could feel the hair on top of his head. When he lightly stroked the strands, his eyes glowed with an idea.

“May I show you something?” Obi-Wan now saw what you meant about him being mature for his age. Even the younglings at the temple his age acted this politely and maturely. He knew it well as he was often a favourite among all of the masters that would give them lessons and they would always come to him with questions.

It was something that you had witnessed a few times on rare visits to the Temple when an issue with the Sith arose. They would absolutely swarm him as he escorted you through the halls. He always said you were good with kids, but he was exceptional.

Never being able to refuse, Obi-Wan would always accept, just as he did now. Aldoken slightly wriggled, asking silently to be let down. When his feet touched the ground, he tugged at the sleeve of Obi-Wan’s tunic. Usually it would be his cloak, but he had taken that off some time ago.

Intrigued, Obi-Wan followed as Aldoken was leading him to his room. When he looked around, it oddly reminded him of his own room that he had gotten when he was still young. There were even a few items that used to be his that lined the nearly empty shelves. Other than that, there were toys of clone troopers, a stuffed varactyl toy, and lots of books. The books must’ve been from your home planet, as yours was one of the few that still actively produced things with flimsiplast.

The varactyl caught his attention as well. Obi-Wan had fond memories of the creature. He only wondered if you had passed on those stories to their son and he caught on. Well, he is your son, he mused.

Lastly, what really surprised him, was the multiple holos of him. One holo that you and him had taken the day he proposed was sitting on a table beside the bed. There were a couple of others. One of him and Cody, another with both Anakin and Ahsoka, and lastly, one of him and Qui-Gon on the day that Qui-Gon was well enough to stand again.

You weren’t lying. You didn’t keep Aldoken away from knowing who he was. If anything, you gave him almost every detail that you knew. He wondered how much Anakin and Cody may have said as well.

“Daddy,” Aldoken’s slightly concerned tone cut into his thoughts.

You came up behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “If this is too much, just let me know,” you say softly. He shook his head. Sure, there were a lot of emotions running through him as old memories flooded with the present, but he didn’t want to leave now. He wanted to know more, see more.

Bringing his attention back to his son, he now held an elegantly engraved box. In the center was the Jedi Order logo. Accompanying it were some intricate details that gave a sense of beauty to it. There was something familiar about it for Obi-Wan…

“Momma and Uncle Ani gave this to me. They said if you ever came back, that I should give it to you,” Aldoken said proudly. He looked to you who was giving him a rewarding smile.

Almost cautiously, he knelt down in front of Aldoken. Now that he was closer, and aid from feeling through the force, he now knew why it looked familiar. This was a box that Qui-Gon had kept for many years. As a padawan, he never knew why the box was so long, and his master never told him.

“You must be patient, Obi-Wan,” he’d say whenever Obi-Wan asked what it was. “In time, you will learn what this box is for. For now, it remains my personal secret.”

As he looked on, he was almost hesitant to even touch it. He had no idea what he was about to see.

Obi-Wan stared at the box for a few moments, only distracted when you came to kneel beside him. Taking a quick glance at you, he gave a small smile as he also felt your hand fall upon his back, rubbing ever so gently.

Diligently, Aldoken held the box, waiting until his father either took it or opened it. Finally, Obi-Wan took a deep breath before relieving his son of the box. Carefully placing it on the floor, his fingers moved to the latch which easily was undone. Slowly, he lifted the top open and was overwhelmed by a flood of emotions.

Inside held only three things. Each item was a mark of some sort of milestone Obi-Wan had reached throughout his life.

The first was a feather from the varactyl he had ridden so long ago on Pijal. That had been the first animal he had ever had such a strong bond with. He had stolen a moment with the varactyl in the stable the day they had to leave. Whether Qui-Gon picked up the feather as they walked out of the stable or some other time, Obi-Wan didn’t know.

Second was his padawan braid. There were so many different milestones woven into these strands of hair. Most of all, it signified the time they spent together as master and padawan. They may have had some rough patches, but the friendship had always lasted.

Lastly, sitting right in the middle, giving Obi-Wan the answer to a lifelong question, was Qui-Gon’s lightsaber. This was the item that finally brought tears to Obi-Wan’s eyes. When he had left in his dark place, he had at some point dropped his master’s saber. Believing you had been killed, he thought it was forever lost on Alderaan’s moon. But, you had brought it back and completed his master’s collection.

Seeing that he was upset, Aldoken moved and hugged around Obi-Wan’s neck. Obi-Wan accepted it quickly and moved his arms around his son. In the process, he pulled him a little closer, still making sure he didn’t squeeze too hard.

The tears didn’t fall, but Obi-Wan did take several shuddering breaths as he composed himself. He suddenly felt calming energy pressing into him through the force. It shocked him, but he knew it was Aldoken. Anakin must’ve taught him that. Especially if it was related to how you were feeling on days through these years.

“Thank you, my little one,” Obi-Wan said before pressing a kiss to the top of the boy’s head.

When he pulled back, Aldoken was beaming. Not only was he proud of his success, but he loved the endearment that his father gave him. There was nothing that he didn’t love about this boy, and he had only just met him not long ago.

“Aldoken, have you ever seen a real varactyl?”

The boy shook his head, “Only on holos.” The disappointed tone made him feel like either laughing, as he knew you would’ve answered like that, or actually feel like his heart should drop at hearing the way he said that.

Obi-Wan elected to give him a smirk, “Here.” He grabbed the varactyl feather and gently took Aldoken’s hand in the other. “This feather was from the first varactyl I had ever ridden.”

Aldoken’s eyes flew wide open in disbelief. Obi-Wan chuckled at the reaction as he brought the feather into better view. The scarlet was beautiful, as it always was. It had always been something that fascinated Obi-Wan. Clearly, even without seeing them firsthand, his son felt the same way.

“Now, when you touch it, make sure to be gentle. The barbs are delicate, but soft,” Obi-Wan said, bringing Aldoken’s hand to the feather. He let it go so that the young boy could do it on his own.

Aldoken’s smile only grew as he gently stroked the scarlet feather that was from an actual varactyl. It was nothing like the ones on his toy. This was real.

Watching the boy’s fascination, he couldn’t help but think, Was that what Qui-Gon always saw? It had always been a wonder that his master put up with him. Especially when it came to those days surrounding and during his time on Pijal.

Now, it’s time to pass on the favour.

After letting his son have a few more moments, he put the feather back into the box with the other items. With a quick glance, he could see Aldoken was dying to ask what the other items were. He silently chuckled to himself. He would tell him the rest soon enough.

“Now, you know how you said that this was mine,” Obi-Wan started, one of his hands resting on his son’s shoulder.

He nodded quickly in response, head tilted in a curious way, wondering why he was bringing this up.

Obi-Wan gave a soft smile, “It isn’t anymore. Do you know why?” Aldoken shook his head. “Because, I’m putting you in charge of taking care of it. It’s now yours.”

Not only was Aldoken shocked, but he felt a wave of it come off of you in the force. Although your face was painted with a grin, you could never truly hide your emotions from Obi-Wan.

The boy started to sputter, trying to say something that Obi-Wan knew would be to politely refuse, but he held up a hand. The sputtering stopped.

“This way, you can have a varactyl with you at all times. Not only that, but you have me and my master along with you. No matter what, we’ll always be with you in this box.” Closing the lid and putting the latch back in place, he handed it over to his son.

Hesitantly, he took it in his hands. Looking at it, he traced over the Jedi emblem with a little finger, quietly saying a shy, “Thank you, daddy.”

Glancing at the chrono on the wall, Obi-Wan realized that he needed to leave. Even though he needed to, he didn’t want to.

You had noticed the sudden shift in Obi-Wan. Catching his eyes when he looked at the chrono, you knew what he was about to say. At the same time, though, it looked like he was truly fighting his decision to leave.

He didn’t want to suffer anymore. The pain that he had to go through to disguise all of this was absolute agony. It was like a candle had to make its flame small so that the dark would have a harder time finding it. And he had to do it every second of the day until he came to see you.

But, he had to do it. He wasn’t able to stay if he was to keep up the act.

Before standing, he caught your eye for a moment. Obi-Wan saw your dejected look, telling him you knew that he had to leave.

He knew you wanted to ask him to stay. You wouldn’t, though. It was almost like the day he said he would leave The Order for you if you wanted him to. You didn’t want him to, as you didn’t want him to leave the life he knew.

Now, you didn’t want him to risk his safety for you. Obi-Wan hasn’t been able to gather enough courage to tell you the torture he’s been through, but he didn’t have to. The day you saw one of his scars peeking out from his collar had told you enough.

It’s not that he didn’t have scars before, but the one you saw was new. Not only that, but it was really new. Before you were able to fret over it, he assured you that he was alright. Even though you didn’t entirely believe him, you let it go. You knew he’d tell you when he was ready.

“I have to go,” he said, keeping his voice from showing his true unwillingness. He knew he didn’t have to voice it, but he did anyway.

“I know,” you said, letting your disappointment be heard.

Turning to Aldoken, he looked just as upset as you. The way his lips pulled down in his frown even looked the exact same as yours. This was the first time tonight that Aldoken had anything less than a neutral expression.

The boy’s eyes were fixed on the floor. It was like he didn’t want to watch him leave. Like he didn’t want to watch his eyes as they turned back. It was just like how you always looked away, not wanting to see his pain.

“Please, daddy,” Aldoken said quietly, still looking at the floor. For a moment longer, he stayed silent until his eyes came back up to meet his. “Please, don’t go.”

Those words rang in his head. It brought Obi-Wan back to that day. The day you had said those exact words, but he didn’t listen. He had turned around, but he never actually listened.

Now, as he looks at the one who he thought he would never meet, he can’t bring himself to do the same. He would never turn away again, whether it meant his life was on the line or not. Never again will he leave you and his family behind. Even with as small of a statement as this.

Obi-Wan looked up at you. Even though he knew you were trying to hide it, he could see that you also wanted him to stay. You always did.

Slowly, he nodded. A smile grew on his face as, with each nod, he was more and more certain about his decision. If both you and Aldoken wanted him here, he would stay. He wanted to stay. Obi-Wan wanted to be loved by you and Aldoken as if these last four years never happened.

Then, he looked back at his son. “Alright,” he said quietly. “I won’t go.” To Obi-Wan, those words held more meaning to you and him than it did to Aldoken. It was an indirect way of making the same promise he had made many years ago. This time, there was a certainty in this promise that he never had before. He would never again turn away from the light, from you.

Aldoken’s smile once again was plastered on his face. Without any more hesitation, he ran up and hugged Obi-Wan before pulling away and running into the sitting room again, cheers of joy loud in the near silent apartment.

Obi-Wan stood back up and turned to face you now that you were alone for a moment. After a few silent moments, you closed the distance and practically fell into his arms. He pulled you close and kissed the top of your head as he felt your breathing hitch, telling him that you were crying.

This had been what he wanted for so long. All he had wanted to do was hold you. Whether it was to comfort you or just for the sake of doing it, he didn’t care. Now he had that, and he wasn’t going to waste it.

“I can sleep on the-”

“You will do no such thing,” you said, whipping your head up from its place on Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “I miss having you to hold me at night.”

“I missed it too,” he replied, looking down as a small feeling of shame creeped in.

“Hey,” you said, using a hand to bring his face back up. “It’s over now. The past is the past, and we can’t change that, but I still love you. After all this time, I never stopped loving you,” you said softly, leaving your hand on his cheek.

Leaning into it, he closed his eyes. He wanted to feel every little bit of warmth and comfort your palm granted him.

Then, he felt as your soft lips pressed to his. The hand on his cheek gently made its way to the back of his head as he kissed you back. He held you close and relished this small moment with you. His decision to stay was already making him the happiest he had ever been since the day the two of you found out you were pregnant and then he proposed.

“Momma! Daddy!” Aldoken called out from the sitting room. “Are you coming?” he asked. The two of you burst into laughter. Now the two of you will learn that moments like this don’t last long with a toddler present.

With a smile, the two of you made your way out to your son. The rest of this night will be one to remember.

-

Obi-Wan woke up to a light shaking at his shoulder. Until this point, this was the first night in years that he hadn’t had a nightmare. He was glad, otherwise he would’ve possibly woken up a lot more violently.

“Daddy,” Aldoken whispered while continuing to gently shake Obi-Wan until his eyes opened.

When his eye laid upon the young boy, concern swept through him. Aldoken was hugging himself and was shaking where he stood.

Turning on his side, he asked, “What’s wrong, little one?”

“I had a nightmare,” Aldoken replied. His voice sounded shaky, like he had, or was about to, cry.

“Oh, buddy, come here,” Obi-Wan said while opening his arms.

His son didn’t waste any time going into his father’s arms. Aldoken mushed his face into Obi-Wan’s neck as he wrapped his arms around the boy. He could feel as the once shaky breaths started to even out and become steady. The boy’s pounding heart had even slowed to a more steady and calm rhythm as well.

“May I sleep with you and momma? So the scary dreams don’t come back,” Aldoken said, muffled from his place still in Obi-Wan’s neck.

“Of course, little one.”

Once Aldoken was calm enough, Obi-Wan helped him climb onto the bed. He adjusted just enough so that their son could lay in between the two of you.

His heart warmed when his son curled under his arm, using his shoulder as a pillow. Breathing a contented sigh, he looked over at you before closing his eyes again. You were facing him and had a small grin spreading your lips.

After Aldoken made one more adjustment in comfort, Obi-Wan let his eyes close once again with a smile. This was a moment that he wished would never end.

- - -

@stardancerluv @where-fantasy-meets-reality @jaydenwoo @madmax2003 @mackycat11 @generousrunawaydonut @imabeautifulbutterfly @animalgirl05

[333dolans]

If By Chance Pt. 2 // E.D

Part 1

Summary: It’s been 2 years since she’d last seen him, what would happen if by chance they were to meet once more?

Sorry for being gone for so long! Ive been super busy and just haven’t had any time to write. I’ll hopefully post a bit more regularly this year! I love you all mwah!!🥰

4:35pm, Great.

It was the first time she would be seeing Gray in what felt like eternity and she was already late, Classic Rory. In her defence, he had agreed to pick her up but a meeting running over later than expected meant she was left to fend for herself. The fact that she didn’t know her way around LA yet paired along with her general lack of time management left her here, outside of the adorable, little cafe Gray had sent her the address for.

She felt the explosion of butterflies erupt within her stomach at the sight of his car and pulled in next to it. She took a moment to compose her thoughts that seemed to be racing along with her heart. Taking a final deep breath, she climbed out from her car and made a start towards the cafe door.

From the very moment she laid her eyes on his tall figure, nothing could of slowed the pace she ran towards him. She called out his name and as he glanced up from his phone, the widest smile took over his face. Opening up his arms just in time, he caught her in his warm embrace. It felt good to be home.

“I missed you so much.” He sighed contently, spinning her around one more time before placing her body back firmly on the ground.

“Missed you more Grapeson.” She replied with a smirk.

“Wow... that’s gotta be a record, we’ve been together what? One whole minute and you’ve already said it.” He rolled his eyes, coaxing a giggle from Rory.

“I said we were bringing it back my love and i meant it!” She grinned smugly up at him before grabbing his hand and leading them into the coffee shop. As the little bell chimed, they were greeted by an older woman who beamed their way.

“Hello Grayson! Your usual i assume? And what can i get for you sweetheart?” She asked with a warm smile.

“Ill go get us a table, i know the best seats.” Grayson told her before wondering off to a far corner in the store.

“Ill get a hot chocolate please.” She replied graciously with a shy smile and the woman was quick to get started on the order.

“I’m Genevieve by the way but you my dear, can call me Gen! You know Grayson never mentioned he had a girlfriend, you’re absolutely gorgeous.” She began to make small talk as she poured Grayson’s coffee into its cup. Rory choked on air at gen’s words, gaping at her in shock.

“Were- were not together, just good friends.” She said with a deep blush.

“Oh my bad! You two would make a beautiful couple if i might say.”

Rory couldn’t help but smile at Gen’s bluntness, she loved her already. After some more casual conversation, Rory said her thank you to Gen and headed off toward the table Grayson had saved, gently placing their drinks on the tabletop before sliding into the booth seat. These seats in particular looked out onto a beautiful landscape and Rory couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief as she sank lower into the leather of the seat, this day couldn’t have gone any better. Nothing had changed between her and gray and she couldn’t be more thankful.

The two sat and talked for hours as the sun began to set on the city that awaited them just outside of the window. They filled each other in on everything and anything they could think of, from childhood memories to the launch of wakeheart. It was inevitable really, that they would eventually end up on the topic of a certain twin brother. No matter how much Rory had tried to change the subject, he always found a way back into the conversation, she knew shed have to face the music someday anyway, may as well bite the bullet sooner rather than later.

“He misses you, you know? He may be an absolute idiot and too damn stubborn to ever admit it but i know that he does. He still reads through your old messages and looks at old photos. He still checks your socials every now and then, I’ve seen him.”

Rory sighed with a small shake of her head.

“Gray, he dropped me remember? No one told him he had to do that, he got a girlfriend and she became more important. That’s life i guess and I’ve dealt with that knowledge for years now. He prioritised her over me and that’s on him.” She let her gaze drift from his face to the window beside her, now littered with stray raindrops from the light drizzle that had began.

She allowed herself to breathe deeply, basking in the feelings that a crisp fall breeze always managed to stir within her. God, did she love autumn. Nothing could compare to the sight of the leaves changing to colours of fire and passion before her very eyes. Along with the colder weather came rainy days, and with rainy days? Time she could spend huddled up in front of a window reading whatever book she’d chosen for that week. Everyone who has ever known Rory, would know full well she would would be half way through that book within the space of a few hours.

Something about the rain had always enticed her, she felt a strange comfort within the damp weather that left most people feeling miserable. She thrived in it, wanting nothing more than to cozy up in fluffy socks and warm layers of clothes and watch droplets race along the panes of the nearest window.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

Slightly startled from his sudden appearance, she beckoned her breathing to calm down to a steady pace once again. She allowed her eyes to trail up his tall frame, soaking him in as much as she could. There stood Ethan in all his glory along with a piping hot mug of her favourite, hot chocolate. Rory was never much of a coffee drinker, always having a sweet tooth and preferring the chocolatey taste to the bitterness a cup of coffee would leave in her mouth for hours. Besides, no one likes coffee breath. She allowed her gaze to retreat back to its fixed spot, staring out into the forest that lined the perimeter of the Dolan’s backyard.

“Then I hate to break it to you E but you’ll be short of quite a few pennies by the time you’ve heard all of the thoughts that are running around my mind right now.”

She allowed a defeated sigh to slip past her lips, filling the silence that had fallen between the two. It was true, her mind had been all over the place ever since the moment the twins had told her of their plan to pursue a career in Los Angeles. She felt like her world was collapsing in on her and in a way, it was. Her whole life as she knew it consisted of Ethan and Grayson Dolan, she had spent practically everyday with the pair for as long as she could remember and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for that chapter of her life to be over.

“A hot chocolate instead? Please Rory, talk to me. I know this is going to be a big change for you, but it is for me and Grayson too yeah? Were all going to be feeling the same emotions in the next few weeks, we have to be there for each other and I can’t do that if you wont open up to me.”

Sliding down opposite her small frame on the cold hardwood floor of his childhood home, Ethan couldn’t help but become overwhelmed by his emotions. This had been his home for many years, it contained so many memories. These very walls had been witness to the life of the three best friends and the idea of leaving this part of his life behind, leaving his best friend behind? It tore Ethan to pieces but he was also optimistic for this exciting new chapter. He tried to remain positive and think of the new adventures they will get to have in the city of angels. The memories he can make with the ones he holds closest.

“Everything is changing E. I don’t think I’m ready to move on from this, I don’t want to be left behind again. I’m going to be so alone here, you guys are the only real friends I have. I don’t want to lose you, or Grayson.”

A stray tear made it’s way down her cheek as the rain continued outside. She looked up to meet the eyes of her best friend, the boy she’d always love. His hand reached out for hers and clasped it tightly in his own. She saw a flash of hope flash across his beautiful brown eyes that she adored so much.

“You could come with us you know? There’s a spare room in the apartment and you know I...we would love to have you there with us. We could go on so many adventures and explore California and we could-“

“E, as wonderful as that sounds, you know my mom would never let me just drop everything and go. What about school? College? You know what she expects of me. I really wish it was that simple.”

In that moment, Rory swore she saw a small piece of Ethan’s heart break away before her very eyes. She forced her tears back, choking slightly from the lack of air that seemed to be escaping her lungs. Why did this have to be so hard? Ethan paused for what felt like eternity before speaking once more.

“I’m going to miss you so much my little lion, so fucking much.”

He outstretched his arms, his warm embrace calling her name. She crawled over to him, closing the small gap that was between them. She clung to his torso as he stroked his fingers through her hair soothingly.

“Nothing is going to change between us Rory, absolutely nothing.”

“Why don’t you come back to our place? I’m not ready to say goodbye yet anyway and I know he’d love to see you. Please, just for a little while?” Gray’s words snapped her back from her reminiscing. He looked into her eyes with such hope, she just couldn’t say no to him.

“God damn those puppy eyes” she cursed under her breath, causing a smirk from Grayson who sat opposite her with a triumphant look on his face.

“I better not regret this Dolan.”

Tags: @rhyrhy462 @evergreendolan @dolansficsandpics @fangdolan @livexdolan @blindedbythelightt @baby-grayson @prettyboydolan @delightfuldolan @sosweetgrethan @episkygrant @resilientdolan @pineappledols @vinylhazza @hydrograyson @velvetdolan @baby-turtles @szadolans @cutestdolans @brockdolan @mercurygrant @abstractstardiva @guiltydols @blazedgraysons @blackpinkdolan @vintagedolan @babeygray @babey-gray @dolanpornhub @onlyyyariii @voidmalfoy @glossydols @graysonsdolansbabygirl @spideysimpossiblegirl @lovingdolans @bubsdolan @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @dolansbeanies @graydolan12 @dolantissue @thecharlietomygillespie @dolandolll @boujeeethan @softethan @risedols @evreths @everydaydolan

[rosyfingereddawnn]

only the black rose (chapter 5)

pairing: jimmy page x layla porter (oc)

warnings: talks of parental abandonment, off-scene injury, drug use (legal!), fluff, and me waxing poetic about one of my favourite books. and more fluff.

words: 3.1k

summary: in the blink of an eye, it’s 1975 and layla’s suddenly joining led zeppelin for their north american tour. throughout the chaos, the band take a liking to her, she builds friendships with the boys, and love blossoms. but all good things must come to an end.

author’s note: this one wrote itself. i expected to take longer with it cause of this. this is the start of the Chaos seen in the 1975 North American tour, so hold onto your hats and enjoy! congrats! you’ve unlocked layla’s tragic backstory! unbeta’d as always, and here’s the link to the playlist :)

masterlist

playlist

chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

----------

Soon enough, the band make their way home, basking in the golden glow of a couple of excellent shows. It’s only a matter of days until the start of the North American tour, and the excitement is palpable. The boys find themselves at the studio, running through some last-minute tour details, accompanied by a certain brunette firecracker, who sits reading comfortably in the lobby.

Layla, sitting on a luxurious couch just outside of the meeting room, is drowning in a hardcover book, consuming every word at a ravenous pace. The sound of pages flipping periodically is accompanied by the light din of voices detailing the upcoming tour. Lost in the story in front of her, she is surprised when she hears a person clearing their throat, seemingly right in front of her. Looking up, she spots the secretary of Swan Song Records, a woman with glasses and long brown hair ran through with gray, pinned up in a low bun. Light freckles dusted her cheeks. Judging by the crow’s feet at the corners of her hazel eyes, the secretary had to have been older than Layla, perhaps around 50, though her bright smile gave the impression of youth.  

“Sorry to interrupt, Miss… I just couldn’t help but notice the book you were reading. I don’t see many fans of the classics around here, especially ones so young.”

Recovering from the shock of being ripped out of the hypnotising story she was wrapped up in, Layla gestures to the seat next to her. With a bright smile, the secretary smoothes down her pencil skirt, and sits down.

“My mother was a literature buff, and it seems she’s passed that down to me! My name’s Layla. You’re Evelyn, right?”

“Y-Yes, I am! How do you…”

“Well, I had to put a name to the lovely secretary that gives me a smile whenever I see her. Makes my day, if I’m being honest.”

“You’re too sweet, darling,” Evelyn says, lips turning up warmly, eyes dancing with joy. “If I may, what are your thoughts on the book? It’s a personal favourite of mine, and it’s always nice to hear new opinions.”

“Well,” Layla starts, lighting up as she speaks. “Wilde’s language paints such a beautiful, vivid picture, and the characters are so interesting, even if they aren’t morally likeable, most of the time. They make mistakes… Many mistakes… but we sympathize with them.”

At this, Layla cups her hand around her mouth, whispering to Evelyn mischievously, as if what she was about to say was the world’s most important secret.

“It’s a favourite of mine too.”

The two women laugh, Evelyn’s hand falling across Layla’s arm, a comforting, grounding weight. Evelyn, with a warm smile gracing her face, crow’s feet as prominent as ever, sends a pang of longing into Layla’s heart. Not for love, but for her old life. Her friends worried out of their minds over her disappearance; her mother, left alone not once, but twice. Her father had left when she was a child, and it had been her and her mother ever since. Layla learned to put up walls, so that she’d never be hurt like that again. They all leave in the end. It’s better that way. Better not to get attached. Better not to get hurt.

“That’s a lovely interpretation, Layla. You know,” Evelyn says, interrupting Layla’s train of thought. “For someone so young, you have an old soul. Wise beyond your years, for sure.”

“You have no idea…”

“Well, I must get to work, darling,” Evelyn claps her hands together, and stands up, resting a hand on Layla’s arm once more. “I’d love to chat again, though. Such refreshing opinions from such a young woman. I’ll let you get back to your book.”

“I would love to! We’ll make plans soon, I promise. Have a wonderful day, Evelyn!” With that, Layla opens the novel, and is taken once again by the current of the story. Minutes pass, until Layla is interrupted once more, this time by a soft press of lips against the crown of her head.

“Everything alright, Layla?”

“Of course, Jim,” Layla says, reaching out to grasp Jimmy’s hand in return. “How did the meeting go?”

“Well, you were right outside the door, I’m surprised you didn’t eavesdrop,” He takes a seat beside her, and reaches down to tap at the book still nestled in Layla’s hand, her finger keeping the page. “You were too engrossed in this, I bet. What are you reading anyways?”

Layla lifts the book to show the cover, which is a slightly worn navy blue, with golden accents in the form of small droplets. In metallic lettering, read ‘The Picture of Dorian Gray’.

“Oscar Wilde, hey? Wouldn’t have pegged you for a lover of the classics.”

“I spent my teenage years with Austen and Dickens, after all.”

“I didn’t think you were that old.”

Layla rolls her eyes, a fond look upon her features. Smiling at the man in front of her, she puts a hand to his cheek.

“Yeah, I’m a real cradle-robber.”

“Just make sure my mum doesn’t hear about this relationship: she’ll have a fit.”

“I’ll be careful, angel,” Layla laughs, putting a pensive finger to her chin. “Hey, Jimmy? Do you have a good relationship with your parents?” Jimmy smiles wide at the question and nods, dark curls bobbing at the movement. He absentmindedly takes Layla’s hand in his, rubbing his thumb in soft circles across her wrist.

“My parents… They’ve always been very supportive of me in every way, and I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to find a way to thank them,” Jimmy squeezes her hand briefly, meeting her eyes. “You know, I bet they’d love you.”

“Do you really think so?” Layla’s cheeks grow warm, and her lips tilt upwards in a smile that is uncharacteristically shy.

“Of course I do, petal,” Jimmy says, pushing a fallen lock of hair behind Layla’s ear, his touch featherlight. “How about you? What are your parents like?”

“Well… My dad… He left us when I was young, so it’s been me and my mom ever since,” This is marked with a moment of silence, and Layla’s eyes meet her shoes, pointedly not looking at Jimmy. “My mom’s probably the strongest person I’ve ever met, and I truly can’t thank her enough for everything she’s done for me. She’s my best friend.”

The silence continues, until Layla feels a calloused finger at her jaw, lifting her chin. Finally flicking her eyes up to gaze at the guitarist, she’s shocked by the concern and sadness she sees in those emerald green eyes.

“Petal, I…”

“Jim, it’s fine. It—”

“It’s not fine, Layla. It’s not. I’m so sorry, you didn’t deserve that. Either of you.” Jimmy pulls her into a tight hug, long arms wrapping around her, making her feel safe. They stay like this for what feels like hours, breaking apart slowly.

“Jimmy, I… Thank you.”

“Of course. Now, how about you read me some of that book of yours?”

Layla laughs brightly, albeit a little watery, and smiles at Jimmy, eyes shining with gratitude. Shuffling, she positions herself in his lap, legs hanging off the end of the couch as his arm comes to rest across her back, holding her steady against his chest. She opens the book, dog-earing the corner of the page she was reading, before flipping back to the start.

“Petal, as much as I like this, I thought we were gonna take it slow? I don’t think public places are the best idea to… Well…”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jimmy,” Layla says, smirk gracing her face as she speaks. “You just make a very comfortable chair.”

Jimmy’s laugh is music to her ears, and she presses a light kiss to his cheek. Focusing on the book in her hand, she begins to read:

“The studio was filled with the rich odour of roses, and when the light summer wind stirred amidst the trees of the garden, there came through the open door the heavy scent of the lilac, or the more delicate perfume of the pink-flowering thorn.”

----------

‘Was it all true? Had the portrait really changed? Or had it been simply his own imagination that had made him see a look of evil where there had been a look of joy?’

The next day had arrived, and Layla sits at her kitchen table, enraptured once again by the writings of Oscar Wilde. The words on the page enchant her, and she has no desire to put the novel down anytime soon. She’d have to tell Evelyn all about it, the next time she sees her.

‘Surely a painted canvas could not alter? The thing was absurd. It would serve as a tale to tell Basil some day. It would make him smile. And, yet, how vivid was his recollection—’

A shrill ringing pulls her out of the carefully crafted narrative of Dorian Gray. Layla huffs, annoyed at the intrusion, and moves to pick up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Layla! Hi, good to hear from you, hope you’re having a great day so far! Lovely weather we’re having, hey?” The slightly nasal voice of one Robert Plant, crackles through the phone, and Layla sighs at his exuberance.

“Robert, hey. What is it?”

“Uh… Please don’t freak out. It’s really not that bad, and everyone is… mostly… fine?”

“Rob—”

This is followed by a noise in the background, a sort of crackle, as if Robert had shifted the phone to his other hand. Layla can hear the way his breath picks up, the way panic seeps into his voice. “Just a heads up that we’ll be at your place in about… 10 minutes! See you then!”

“What is going on? I was reading, I’m really not in the mood for—”

Another crackle, and a sigh from Robert’s end of the line. Layla runs a hand through her hair, biting her lip in an attempt to quell the panic rising in her throat.

“Promise me you won’t freak out, little dove.”

Layla exhales sharply through her nose, unimpressed at the plea of the man on the other line. Coiling the telephone cord around her finger to calm her nerves, she responds.

“Fine, I’m not gonna freak out. Now, tell me what happened.”

“Well… Um… Jimmy, well, he kinda… got his… finger slammed in a train door?”

“...”

“Layla? Are you still there?”

“How?!”

“I told you not to freak out…”

“Robert!” Layla exclaims, concern painted clearly on her flushed face.

“Okay, okay, he told us he was holding the door open for someone on the way to Swan Song, and well… You know the rest.”

“Is he going to be okay?”

Another sigh sounds from the other line, and Layla waits in anticipation for his response, growing anxious with each passing moment. Finally, she hears the man’s response, and deflates with relief, sinking into the chair beside her.

“He should be fine. Like I said before, we’re gonna come get you right away. He’ll be okay, Layla.”

“Okay…Robert?”

“Yes, little dove?

“Thank you.”

“Of course,” Robert chuckles lightly, bringing a smile to Layla’s face, the undercurrent of anxiety still coursing through her. She thinks it will stay that way, until she sees Jimmy, makes sure he’s okay. “We’ll be there in 10 minutes. Sit tight, Layla.”

Layla sits at the kitchen table, biting her thumbnail, mind elsewhere, until she hears the telltale sound of a car pulling up, engine cutting out. Flying out the door, She spots Jonesy in the driver’s seat, Bonzo next to him, with Robert in the back. Opening the door, she sits next to the blond, and he gazes over at her, putting a hand to her shoulder. Sympathy flashes across his face as he takes in the shocked look Layla’s sporting.

“He’ll be okay, Layla. He will.”

“Robert, I… Jonesy, please, just drive?”

“Right.”

The engine rumbles to life, and they’re off, no doubt speeding to whatever hospital Jimmy’s holed up in. Layla lets her thoughts drift to Jimmy. She wonders how he’s doing, if he’s in any pain, if they’re treating him well. She’s distracted enough that she barely feels Robert’s hand, warm and comforting, on her knee. Layla is snapped out of her thoughts by a particularly sharp turn, and she looks up at Robert, her eyes brimming with tears.

“Rob… What if he’s… not okay? It was his finger. That means that he might not be able to play, if it’s bad enough,” She stammers, eyes frantic in their search of the blond’s face. “His guitar is his life, and—”

“Layla, calm down. It’ll be okay. It won’t do us any good to think like that.” Robert leans over, throwing his arm around her shoulder as best he could in the cramped car. To his surprise, she leans into him, resting her head on his shoulder. Layla unconsciously brings a hand up to bite her thumbnail, and catching the action, Robert places his hand on hers, pushing it back down to rest in her lap. They stay that way until the car rolls to a stop in the hospital parking lot. Layla lifts her head from Robert’s shoulder with breakneck speed, scrambling out of the car.

“Layla, wait!” Jonesy calls out, running after the woman, who dashes through the door. Robert and Bonzo catch up, just as Layla reaches the front desk, panting from exertion. The nurse on shift looks at her, eyes wide, shocked at the display.

“Excuse me, love,” Bonzo says, tucking Layla under his arm as he speaks to the nurse. “We’re looking for James Page? He was brought in for a fractured finger, I believe?”

“...Yes, right. What is your relationship with the patient?”

“We’re his bandmates, we can call our manager if you need proof. Please, we just need to see if he’s okay.”

The nurse eyes the group dubiously, and grabs the chart sitting next to her, looking through it. Glancing at the group again, she points behind them, to a room packed with seats, posters and pamphlets lining the walls.

“It seems that Mr. Page is still with the doctor getting X-rayed, so I’m going to need you to take a seat in the waiting area. Give that manager of yours a call, and we’ll see what we can do for you.”

“Thank you, love.” Bonzo says, as he herds the group over to the soft, patterned armchairs, plopping down with a sigh. Jonesy excuses himself to make a phone call to Peter, the others left waiting for news that won’t come fast enough.

Jimmy has to be okay. He has to.

----------

“For James Page?” The nurse’s voice rings out across the waiting area, and the group shoot up from their seats, stiff backs groaning in protest. “Follow me.”

The nurse leads them through a labyrinth of hallways, stopping finally at a room with a large 164 pasted on the closed door. Through the window looking into the room, Layla spots Jimmy asleep under the covers, his hands atop the sheets, resting on his stomach. He looks peaceful, she thinks, like he’s devoid of pain. If she couldn’t see the injured hand at all, she’d have thought he was perfectly fine.

The group finally walk into the room, the sharp smell of antiseptic burning their nostrils. Hearing the click of the door opening, Jimmy opens his eyes, pupils blown wide. His irises are almost black, and he sends them a dopey smile, a giggle bursting out.

“Hey, guys. Fancy seeing you all here.” Jimmy slurs, laughing harder now, as though he had told the most hilarious joke in the world. The boys join in, amused by the antics of their guitarist. Layla hangs back, staring at Jimmy, concern clear on her face. She had spotted the injured finger on the way in, which was already bruised a deep purple, the fingernail completely blackened.

“They give you the good stuff, Pagey?”

“You know it, Jonesy.” Jimmy shoots the bassist a sloppy wink, and the group erupts into soft laughter once more. Taking a dazed glance around the room, the raven-haired man pouts, completely endearing in his drugged state. “Hey… where’s Layla?”

Peter, who had been standing next to the bed, moves aside, and glassy green met warm brown. The guitarist smiles softly, relaxing back into the pillows. He sticks out his uninjured hand, and she walks closer to take it. Never lessening her grip, Layla threads the fingers of her free hand through Jimmy’s messy curls, and looks down at him fondly.

“How’re you doing, champ?”

“Good, now that you’re here. I would kiss you right now… if I wasn’t seeing two of you.”

“They must have him on the really good stuff…” Layla throws over her shoulder, looking back at the injured guitarist. He’s looking up at her with unabashed affection, and she can’t help but blush at the adoration in his gaze.

“Sorry to interrupt,” comes from the open doorway, as Jimmy’s doctor steps through. “I’m Dr. Vane, I treated James when he came in. If you’d kindly step out for a moment, I’d like to go over his prognosis.”

The boys file out of the room, and Layla goes to follow, stopped in her tracks by Jimmy tugging her back towards him with a whimper. She gives in, sinking back down in the chair at his bedside.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, Jimmy. I was so scared when Robert called. I thought...”

“I’m glad you’re here, petal. Now, come into bed with me. I want to see you better.” Jimmy mutters, scooting over to make room for her to fit in the small hospital bed. Layla laughs, nodding, and crawls in beside him, careful not to hurt him. She turns on her side, her hand landing in his hair again. Jimmy looks up at her, pupils still dilated, and presses a quick peck on her lips, giggling anew.

“You’re so beautiful. Have I ever told you that you’re beautiful? ‘Cause you are.” He insists, slurred speech returning in full force, his eyes fluttering closed.

“Go to sleep, Jimmy. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

He hums softy in response and a few seconds later, Jimmy’s breathing evens out. He’s dead to the world. Through the door left ajar, Layla can hear snippets of the conversation with the doctor.

“... Fractured the tip of his finger… At least a month.”

“Will he be able to play anytime soon?” That was Peter, voice soft with worry for the frail man in the hospital bed.

“He should rest… Not good to put too much strain on it… Keeping him here until the anaesthetic wears off.”

Tuning them out, Layla looks down at the man sleeping beside her. His hair is matted on one side of his head, and he snores louder than he’d ever admit, but he looks peaceful. He’s not in any pain, and that’s enough for Layla. She drifts off, as the sound of footsteps against the floor draw near. Her tired eyes open to slits, and she sees a shadow with dark, shoulder-length and a beard. It must be Bonzo, she thinks. The last thing Layla hears before succumbing to the exhaustion that plagues her, is the drummer’s soothing voice, hushed to a whisper.

“Let them sleep.”

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taglist: @jimmys-zeppelin @salixfragilis @timetraveller4 (let me know if you want to be added!)

[theonesthatiworship]

Musings

You can find the ao3 version of this fanfic here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33606406 

A/N: Hey guys! I know I don't have an excuse for being gone so long, but I hope you can understand. I'm working on the second chapter of the Champion Reading I, which should be coming out soon. But for now, here's this! Sorry if the writing is too formal for canon or if OOCness is happening, this was a creative writing assignment for ELA, but I (of course) turned it into a fanfic. The guy Harry talks about in this diary is supposed to be Ron, but if you want it to be someone else, it totally can be. Also, the poems in the middle are haikus that I also wrote for class. I hope you guys like them, because I worked really hard on them :)

Disclaimer: The poems are all originally created by me, and belong to me. Please don't take credit for them, or use them elsewhere. Or if you do, please at least credit me as the original author.

Trigger Warning: minor internalized homophobia at the end

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The Journal of Harry J. Potter

Please return to owner if lost.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

September 3, 1993,

I admire many things very deeply, though it might not seem so at first glance. My love can be as deep as my hatred. I find joy in soft, sweet melodies, as long as the musician is competent, as it isn’t so in today’s day and age. Colourful, three-dimensional works with much depth and layer are most pleasing to my eye, and are what I prefer to draw myself.

When I endeavour myself to this craft, I leave my finished works to dry along my bedside nightstand, along with the rest of my treasured memorabilia. The rest of the boys in my dorm know not to disturb me during the time that I draw. I know almost nothing about astrology, I can admit, but the stars and the planets fascinate me. Especially their movements and almost otherworldly beauty. I very much like to draw and paint about this subject.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

November 3, 1994,

Anguish in your flight

Ink blotting stains your letters

At last, blissful peace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

January 5, 1995

Yesterday has been too strange. I don’t find myself thinking often about him, but sometimes it seems as if he goes out of his way to distract me. I was standing near a window while the other boys at the gathering were laughing amongst themselves. I don’t have much of anything to say to people at social events, so I usually just remain silent.

My mind could only traverse back to our past conversations, to the sound of his laughter, and the almost odd sight of his pale complexion against my dark one. My heart flutters a bit, and I do not understand why. Once I get too deep in thought, he gently seizes my wrist and brings me into the circle with the others, and forces me to speak with them.

I cannot comprehend why he can’t just leave me be, but perhaps it has something to do with the strange feelings festering within the corners of our hearts, if he indeed does share them.

I suppose only time can tell with this one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

February 14, 1995,

Winter nights bring cold

Warmth deep in your mocha eyes

Deep cold melts away

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

July 6, 1995,

Some people say I am a bit too contemplative for their liking, and I suppose it is true. I find too many things saddening in this life. I cannot help it. One day I was taking a stroll along the park, when I found a child laughing with his mother. I felt sick with myself for doing so, but I felt a rage rise within me at the innocent sight.

What was it, that this child had done in his life, that did not grant me the same luxury? Fate, I suppose, chance. ‘Tis foolish. What is wrong with me, I ask, that makes me feel such a terrible emotion over something so bright and lovely in this world?

Perhaps it is me that is wrong and twisted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

July 31, 1995,

Jerusalem bells

Praise be the divine angels

Please, save this tired soul

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August 5, 1995,

The summer sun is much too hot for my tastes. It is quite bothersome. Especially when I am trying to go for my daily stroll. I don’t exercise much, but I try to go on walks every day, to keep up my good figure. The weather was terribly humid, and all throughout the journey, I could feel myself sweating. It was very distasteful, and a feeling that I entirely loathe. I took a thorough shower once I arrived home.

To make matters worse, Aunt Petunia scolded me for leaving my dirty clothes on the laundry floor. I wished, not for the first and certainly not the last time, that it was school once more, so I could at last be away from home.

Yes, I truly hate summertime, with every fibre of my being.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

August 13, 1995,

Dear old grandmama

Your limp, gray hair is too tired

This burden of life

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

August 30, 1995,

Today was surprisingly pleasant, especially for summertime. I had just finished freshening myself up for the day, when I noticed a lemon-scented note waiting for me on my dresser, with a single red rose on top of it. I was very pleased with my discovery. Roses are my favourite of all flowers, and the sweet smell was most welcome!

I opened the note, to find that it had been written by him. There was that strange fluttering in my heart again, that I didn’t like to ruminate on too deeply. After reading the beautiful note, in elegant print, I held it close to my heart and looked up at the ceiling in thought. I remained that way ‘till breakfast-time, as I pondered.

Perhaps summertime wasn’t all too horrid.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

December 31, 1995,

My dear love, my life!

Beautiful angel of mine

Must you hurt me so?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 7, 1996,

The boys at my school are so juvenile! You would think they were still toddlers, with their lack of maturity. All they do is speak of girls, crack stupid jokes, pull pranks, and offend others. I am especially grateful now that I am above such things. I think it would be most loathsome to be of such a temperament. I almost pity my cousin, but he is too much of a nuisance to fully gain my sympathy.

Then again, I suppose I can attribute my sensibility to my queer ways. Were I a normal man, I do not doubt that I would not be nearly self-aware enough to come to such logical conclusions. But I suppose they are not completely worthless.

The other day, a boy asked me to come with him to the Fairfield Festival. I thought of him, and declined. Accepting would seem like a betrayal to his affections, as complicated as they may be.

Hopefully one day, I find a woman good enough to rouse my spirits as he does.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

May 1, 1997,

Fiery are the flames

That douse the candle of life

O Lord, have mercy