#regulus being regulus
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moonyswarmsweaters · 7 hours ago
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I think the Black brothers missed out on children things growing up
[at the zoo]
Regulus, talking to a penguin: What're you in for? Murder?
James: He's not in for anything.
Regulus: So can he leave?
James: No.
Regulus: Because he's in witness protection?
James, smiling a bit: No.
Regulus, confused: Well then just what the fuck is going on?!
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darcellexxx · 3 days ago
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Better boyfriend than him.
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Summary: Coming late to the common room was a mistake, keeping secrets even worse. Telling the marauders that you were dating someone was bad enough itself, but saying that he was a Slytherin made it even harder. Sirius, the charming guy, can’t just accept the truth and needs to go and deal with it himself, whether it be physical or not.
Pairing: Regulus Black x fem!gryffindor!reader (Sirius Black x fem!gryffindor!reader)
Word count: 2.2k
Warnings/Tags: Possessive!Regulus; Possessive!Sirius; The Black brothers competing against each other; PHYSICAL FIGHTING; BLOOD; slight angst (but it’s good)
A/N: WHEEW 😍 BLACK BROTHERS SAVE ME! It was so fun to write this, really. Hate the ending tbh but I think it’ll be fine. PLEASE DO LISTEN TO THE SONG, IT’LL MAKE IT SO MUCH BETTER PLS!!!
Being friends with the marauders meant being involved in all of their shenanigans and pranks, meaning it was a ride-or-die friendship. Being one of the marauders also meant hating all the Slytherin, except you didn’t.
You were actively seeing one.
Walking back to the Gryffindor tower after being down in the dungeons was a whole Quidditch workout itself, but you couldn’t just blatantly admit where you were when you had to be with your friends fifteen minutes ago.
Running up the stairs and hissing out the password breathlessly, you climbed into the common room.
The guys were already sitting there, Remus with a book sprawled on the couch and James sitting next to the fire while Sirius was pacing around the room.
“Sorry guys, McGonnagall stopped me-“ You started before you were met with prying eyes that were fixated on your shirt. Not really yours anyway..
You then realised what the problem was. While you were down in the castle, you grew cold, and you decided to take Regulus’ shirt.
With quick movements you zipped your Gryffindor jacket up, hiding the green fabric before dusting yourself off.
“Where were you?” Remus asked, putting his book aside.
“Stop beating around the bush, why were you in the Slytherin common room?!” Sirius demanded dramatically, looking at you with a small pout.
“What? I wasn’t-.. How do you know where I was?!” You scoffed, blushing at the question and at the way they found out about your secret. Walking over to the couch, you sat down next to Remus, hugging your knees as you watched Sirius who was staring at you.
“Stop lying, we saw you on the map.. What’s going on?” Remus being Remus, asked softly as he watched your chin rest on your kneecap.
With a sigh, you whined softly and hid your face.
“I can’t just tell you, you’ll kill him first and then me..” You reasoned carefully, watching James sit up subtly.
“He? Who is he??!” Sirius squealed, his pout growing deeper.
“Padfoot- just relax and let her speak.” James sighed and rolled his eyes, pushing his glasses up his nose.
Sirius sat down and crossed his arms, flipping his hair back like a fancy shampoo advertisement.
“Well? Who were you with?” The guy asked, and at that moment he looked more like McGonnagall than the rebel he was.
“Listen- I was with a..” You hesitated, thinking of a plausible explanation.
“A partner for a project..” You responded slowly, not exactly lying but not saying the truth either.
“A partner for a project?” Remus asked with a raised eyebrow, and you knew that you didn’t even fool him.
“Yes, no, yes. Kinda.”
“Kinda?” James asked, an incredulous expression on his face.
“I was with a guy- alright?”
“A guy?!” Sirius exclaimed, and this time James had to hold his arm in order for him to stay in his place.
“A Slytherin? A slimy git?” He continued, feeling agitated.
“Yes. But he’s not a slimy git! He’s actually super nice..” You responded, feeling giggly and slightly giddily about your boyfriend.
“A Slytherin? Nice?!!”
“Sirius, just shut up!” James scoffed, rolling his eyes.
“Why would you be with a guy in the common room?” Sirius asked, trying to push James away.
“Sirius, why do you think I would be with a guy?!” You scoffed, now sprawling yourself out on the couch.
“I- I don’t know..” Sirius mumbled, seeming uncharacteristically upset.
“Who were you with..? Not Snivellus, right..?” James asked in a careful voice, now caressing Sirius’ shoulder gently.
“No! No way.. but- it’s- not better either..” You mumbled, biting your lips in an anxious manner.
“If you don’t tell us-“ Sirius started, now looking like he’s ready to jump on you.
“Moony..!” You chuckled nervously, looking at the guy who now jumped at the sudden attention towards him.
“How about I tell you first and then you somehow, magically, without my presence tell it to the others?” You asked, even though it seemed like it was more like a demand than anything.
“Uhh-“ Remus started, glancing to you and then back at the guys.
“Lovely! Scoot over,” You exclaimed, gripping his shoulders.
When you quietly whispered Regulus’ name into his ear, you saw how Sirius was silently fuming and James was trying to soothe the guy.
The life drained out of Remus’ face, his eyes widening.
“Is it bad..?” You asked carefully, hoping to find sympathy in your friend’s expression.
“Bloody hell..” He whispered, looking at you as if you just told him you were pregnant. “Sirius will kill you..”
“WHAT??! Who is it, Lupin?!” Sirius exclaimed, and when the attention was now off you, you quickly darted up to the dormitories.
The only people in the common room were the marauders, and Sirius was now laying on the carpet, feeling numb and drained.
“My brother.. My death-eater, dirty, filthy, little Reggie..” Sirius murmured, staring at the ceiling.
“How did that even happen?! How-?” He scoffed, rolling over on his stomach.
“What do you mean? She’s the beauty of Hogwarts, it was weird enough that she didn’t get a boyfriend before him.” Remus spoke, trying to read his book but it was visible that he was deep in his thoughts.
“Yeah but- Him? That’s insane..” Sirius spoke, running a hand through his hair.
“Padfoot, if you want to discuss it, talk to her. I’m not gonna talk for her.” The guy sighed, slinging his feet off the couch.
“I’m going to bed, it’s a lot to take right now. Try not to kill your brother, mate.” He patted Sirius on the shoulder, walking to the stairs where the dormitories are.
“You’ll just leave me behind?” Sirius whined,
“Sorry mate, if you want to, we can talk tomorrow.”
-
A week passed and the guys were trying their best to keep the information hidden, but it was hard when all Peter wanted was to talk to you about it and Sirius who was trying not to strangle his brother in front of the whole school.
And yet in the whole week, Sirius was avoiding you like the plague, and you decided to put an end to it.
While Sirius was glaring at his parchment paper, you walked over to his table and dropped the heavy books across from him.
“What is going on? Why are you ignoring me?” You demanded, slamming your hands on the table.
“What’s going on? You’re literally dating my brother! My baby Reggie!”
You scoffed, feeling angry at the guy in front of you.
“Does it really bother you that much that I’m dating him? Because now it seems like you don’t want him to date me! Like I’m some bad influence or something!” You exclaimed, and you felt the ghost of the librarian moving behind you. Warning you to keep yourself quiet.
“I am mad at you because he is a Black! He is going to mess with you! He is not who you think he is!” Sirius hissed, his warm eyes suddenly cold. Like a storm.
“Why can’t you just accept this? You know, right now you seem just like your family whom you despise! Cold, heartless and selfish! Regulus was with me when no one was, while you were planning pranks, he was there and listened to me whine and even took me out to the black lake!” You spat, standing up and abandoning your books you initially brought.
“What?! I could’ve done the same! Even better!” He exclaimed, and now stood up as well.
“But you didn’t!”
“And what do you mean I’m like my family? Don’t you dare compare me to the disgusting blood supremacists!” His hand shot up to yours before you could walk out.
“Then maybe stop acting like one, Black.” You couldn’t stop the words that left your mouth, and now you regretted all of your life choices all at once, but you couldn’t do anything but to go and leave him.
Sirius now stood there alone, the cold shiver of realisation creeping up his back. He wasn’t like his family.. He couldn’t be..
His choices were now to find you again or to find his brother, and after the disappointing conversation with you, he decided to find his brother.
Every step was like torture, and he felt like he was just floating between the crowds.
Then he finally found the boy he was looking for, short hair, cold presence. A Black, not him. He’s not a Black..
Sirius grabbed his shoulder and roughly pulled into an empty classroom, slamming him against the wall, some pictures and things falling down from the impact.
Regulus hissed in pain, but before he could react, Sirius grabbed him by his shirt, pulling him closer.
“What are you doing with her?!” The older guy barked, tightening his grip around the crisp fabric.
“Who?” Regulus feigned nonchalance, gripping Sirius’ wrist in response tightly.
“Her. I know that you’re just using her. It’s in your blood.” Sirius fumed, clenching his teeth.
“Your blood as well, remember? Could’ve gotten the inheritance, but no.. You think you're better, huh? That you’re too good for it?” Regulus sneered mockingly, shaking his head lightly.
“I’m not a pure blood like you. I’m a person who has a heart, not like you. Heartless, cold. I’m a warm Gryffindor, you’re a greasy snake.” Sirius growled, his face now up to the other ones.
“Yeah? Good, warm heart? Where was your warm heart when she needed help? When she cried, oh so sweetly on my shoulder..?” Regulus cooed, pouting softly before breaking into a smirk.
“You get off of her.. you enjoy seeing her cry, don’t you..?” Sirius asked quietly, anger burning quietly.
“Oh no, not that.. I would turn the world around for her, buy her the things she couldn’t even imagine existed.. Get rid of the people that have yet done bad to her.. I just get off of the thought that she went to me, not you.” He whispered into his ear carefully, the words soft and warm, almost taunting.
Sirius didn’t like the sound of his explanation and he quickly pushed his brother to the ground, his back hitting against the desks and chairs that fell over. Regulus, one not to get messed with, dragged his brother down with him, throwing a punch in the air.
Blood staining the shirts were now all over the alabaster skins of the guys. Knuckles absolutely broken, bloody lips and groans as one and the other tried to get the upper hand.
Sirius was now straddling Regulus, an iron grip on the dirty and crumpled shirt.
“She should be with me.. she should be mine.” He whispered to the guy who was now lying on the wooden floor.
“Yeah? I won’t let her go so easily, I want her. And I always get what I want..” Regulus now grinned, showing his bloodied teeth.
Both of them looked horrible, almost impossible to tell who was winning or losing. Sirius looked like a wild animal, hair unruly and tangled, while Regulus looked like he got run over by a truck. And yet they looked both so hot, enough to make it on the screens for a magazine.
Sirius was about to say something, but he felt a hand on his shoulder that let him fall to his butt.
“Love..!” Sirius gasped, seeing you stand with a shocked and angry expression.
“Sirius! Are you out of your mind?” You yelled, crouching down over Regulus, taking his face in your hands.
“You don’t understand..! I-“ Sirius started, getting on his fours, feeling drowsy from the pain.
“You don’t understand! Look what you’ve done!” You cradled Regulus’ face, and while you glared at Sirius, you missed out on the smile on the guy’s face. One that said ‘you are priceless, love’.
“Love.. I’ll be fine, he didn’t even do anything..” Regulus spoke softly, trying to brush the fight off. Like he didn’t have any impact.
“No! You look horrible..” You spoke, breaking your gaze from the silent Gryffindor guy.
“Horribly sexy..” You didn’t know whether to scoff or to blush at his teasing. Damaged and pliant Regulus was probably your most precious Regulus.
“Let’s go, you’re acting weird and affectionate..” You murmured and tried to get the guy up.
“It’s just I’m drunk on your love..” He whispered and kissed your knuckles, and you didn’t know whether it was because Sirius was watching you or because he really meant it. Nethertheless, you grabbed his arm and threw it over your shoulders, holding his weight, even if it was just a bit, Regulus couldn’t help but smile in satisfaction. Maybe he didn’t win the fight, but he won the war.
“You’re too good to me..” Regulus kissed the top of your head, a possessive gesture that showed who was the one who had you.
Sirius glared at both of you, not getting on his feet again.
“I could be better than him,” He said bluntly, clenching his fists. You looked at him over your shoulder, and watched his bad state.
Maybe you would have wanted to help him as well. Patch him up and take care of him.. But you had another one whom you needed to help, and you couldn’t have them both now, could you..?
“I don’t doubt it..” You whispered and were about to open the door when Regulus got ahead from you.
“Ladies first, I insist..” He whispered, smirking his boyish smirk, and when you walked out he looked at his brother again who was fuming.
The war wasn’t over, it was just the start of the largest competition. Competition over a heart that wasn’t yet fully occupied.
Sure it was taken by a Black, but which one..?
Dividers by @/cafekitsune
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sunseekerchild · 2 days ago
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Dorcas: Hey, do you have a bag I can borrow?
Regulus: The only bags I have are the ones under my eyes, and they're specifically designed to carry the burden of my existence.
Dorcas: Literally all you had to do was say no.
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n3raida · 3 hours ago
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Sirius can hear dog whistles and Regulus always keeps one around to piss off his big brother.
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incorrect-transpirings · 9 months ago
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Regulus: [doing anxious things with his hands]
James: [getting visibly flustered]
Regulus: ???? are you having Gay Thoughts about my anxiety stims???
James: ….. maybe
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When Sirius first started teaching Regulus how to prank people, Reg was really bad at it. Like... REALLY bad.
He switched the positions of two books on the bookshelf in the Slytherin common room and went round the whole day giggling evilly (Nobody noticed. Obviously.)
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moonycriesdies · 2 months ago
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James : What is your biggest weakness?
Regulus: I can be uncooperative.
James: Okay, can you give me an example?
Regulus: No.
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shadowjinx2906 · 7 months ago
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James: *sighs a madly in love sigh* He speaks with a voice as sweet as honey 😍
Regulus: The fuck you looking at, Four Eyes?
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labryslabyrinth · 2 months ago
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Jegulus meeting for the first time
Sirius: Hogwarts is the best place to date someone, reggie. Have you found anyone yet?
Regulus: Nahh. I have enough self respect that if I settle for someone who isn’t worthy of me, I’ll feel trapped. But at the same time I don’t have enough self esteem that if I settle for someone who I’m not worthy of, I’ll feel like I’m drowning.
Sirius, terrified: WHAT?! That’s it, you need some positivity in your life. Hey, meet James. He’s the brightest person you can ever meet.
James: heyyy
Regulus:
Regulus: maybe drowning wouldn’t be such a bad experience
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not-rab · 1 year ago
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this with jily BUT james ends up falling in love with the therapist (*cough* regulus)
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gwrfelds · 4 months ago
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Mark Eydelshteyn as Regulus A. Black
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moonyswarmsweaters · 1 day ago
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Regulus: All of your existences are confusing.
James: How?
Regulus: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.
James: Awww
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rhetorical-conscience · 4 months ago
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James: So, what are you in the mood for today?
Regulus: World domination.
James: Love, we've been over th-
Regulus, interrupting: You're my world.
James: Awww, Reg!!!
Regulus:
James:
Regulus:
James: OH.
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sunseekerchild · 2 months ago
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someone flirts with james at a bar
regulus: you smiled back
james: it’s called being polite…
regulus: it’s called being single, apparently
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gayeilgeoir · 4 months ago
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Boss @taylorswiftmicrofic 285 words, Wolfstar and Jegulus
“I’m sick of him!” Sirius sighed exasperatedly, slamming a white envelope with a broken red wax seal down on the table and flopping angrily into the seat next to Remus.
“I beg your pardon?” Remus asked, picking up the envelope and seeing Regulus’s neat print on the front “What did he do this time?”
Sirius glared at him, arms folded across his chest like a stropping child. He grabbed the letter from Remus’s hands harshly, pulling out the scroll and unfurling it with a flourish. It appeared Sirius Black simply had to be dramatic even when he was utterly irate, he couldn’t escape it. It was his nature.
“Dearest Brother” Sirius began to read aloud, imitating Regulus’s slightly more pronounced French accent than his own “I have recently been told that you have decided to start dating Remus lupin, my best friend. This is truly unacceptable in my eyes, I cannot stand this betrayal. So I have decided to follow in your footsteps. Being told that you’re “the boss of me” and to “emulate your example” was something I had to listen to a few too many times as a child, and I fear it has somehow worn in. This time, I choose to emulate your example, and start shagging your best friend. You truly are a fabulous teacher in the art of being petty Sirius.
I bet Christmas at the potters will be far more interesting than usual now.
Love, your baby brother, James’s boyfriend
Reggie”
“Merlin” Remus laughed, clutching his sides in pain “I fucking love him��
“You’re supposed to be on my side moony!” Sirius groaned, standing up and walking towards the door “I’m going to go set the dungeons on fire”
(Op is under 18)
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yourgalgremlin · 10 months ago
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Creep hitting on Regulus @ the bar:
GUY: What’s your body count, beautiful?
REG: That depends.
GUY: On what?
REG: Wether you’re asking how many guys I’ve “taken home” or how many I’ve taken out ☠️
REG (whispers): Both are higher than you’d think.
JAMES: …I want him in a way that’s concerning to my life expectancy.
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