#hits me much harder anyway

[obstinatecondolement]

Sometimes I'm like "I wonder if there's a sad acoustic version of this fun upbeat 80s song that would work for a vid" and the answer is almost always yes there is, but using the more fun version to make an ironically upbeat angsty vid hits much harder.

[qiinamii]

we'll do fine.

[lotus-pear]

yeah sure therapy is nice but teen soukoku is faster and a lot cheaper

[the-great-kraken]

one thing that really annoys me about a lot of les mis productions is their insistence on making the les amis de l'abc older than they are. i know it's partly a schematics thing with hiring younger actors, but to me so much of the tragedy behind the barricade comes from the fact they were kids. they were college students staring at a future they despised, desperate to change it, and they - and the hope they had for a kinder future - were slaughtered. i mean, hell, the musical talks about it! all the time! javert calls them schoolboys, turning is the mothers of paris staring at corpses of boys who could have been their sons, cosette eponine and marius are kids lost in their first loves. idk it seems like such a minor thing but to me it's so core to what makes this story so devastating

[caroll-in]

what do YOU know about welsh kings

[nikoisme]

ended up rereading the epic of gilgamesh to freshen my memory for my class and. my god. i forgot how much this thing genuinely slaps. so excuse me i will go and cry for a bit.

[rascheln]

Maybe my favorite part about Cheongryeo as a part-time antagonist is that he clearly genuinely likes Park Moondae/Ryu Gunwoo outside of his general obsession with him as someone who knows what he's been going through. It's interesting to have a character who does messed up shit not because he hates the main character or wants to see him fail, but because he wants to challenge him to do better. Except he's also got his brain thoroughly scrambled by regressing who knows how many times and so his 'help' comes with a huge chance of coming closer to sabotage.

[aria0fgold]

A confession of wishes for a future without you.

Ren sat up from the bed, he couldn't sleep. He's been lying down for hours now, eyes closed even, and yet he still couldn't find his own sleep. Morgana laid beside him, sound asleep. He carefully got up, so as to not disturb him. Making sure to walk quietly in his room while looking for something, anything to help him sleep. A book, a distraction, whatever it is that he can find. So he began his search and not even a minute later, stumbled upon a box. One far too familiar that he froze when he saw it. How many months had it been since he had that box now? He doesn't know, didn't want to keep track of that time, didn't even want to think about anything in regards to it at all.

A small black box with intricate designs painted in red, it wasn't locked, in fact, it can easily be opened. But Ren never did open it. He didn't want to, he didn't want to know what's inside it, didn't want to face the reality that Kaito— that he— that his friend is… He wanted to bathe in the pool of lies he made for himself, that Kaito's sudden disappearance isn't too much of a big deal, that someday, maybe just maybe, he'll come back again. He continued to lie to himself like that, ever since Kaito disappeared.

Perhaps, it's time to face reality once more.

Ren took a deep breath, opening and closing his hand in an effort to steady its trembling, in an effort to gather enough courage to open the box he had been avoiding ever since he first saw it, days after he lost all contact with Kaito. It was hidden underneath the bed, Ren moved it somewhere else, farther from him yet in its own safe place. Just like what he wished and hoped for Kaito as well, far from him yet safe. So he kept wishing, over and over again.

Please be safe, please be safe, please be safe.

That's how wishes work, right? To think it three times, say it thrice, and believe with all your heart for it to be real. So he held onto that hope. No matter how small it was, he held onto it like a precious gem nestled within his palm, threatening to shatter at the slightest jolt.

Ren took a few more deep breaths, until finally, he reached for the box and lifted its lid. In it was a letter, white with a blue ribbon, and a monocle beside it. Ren can feel the gears in his brain coming to a halt, slowly… slowly… it'd freeze in time, but not now, not yet. Mechanically, Ren stood up and walked towards the bed, he sat by the edge, near the window to put an arm on, to lean his body on. For support maybe, for a hope perhaps, that once he's finished reading the letter. Kaito would appear in his white suit with his cape flowing in the wind, the magician in the moonlight.

That's what this is, isn't it? A confession of secrets. He had an idea about it, infamous internationally wanted criminal, Kaito KID was Kaito Kuroba's other identity. He had a feeling that was the case but never pursued the thought, it'd be unfair, won't it? For Ren to intrude into Kaito's secret when he has his own secrets to hide. So it'd just be fair, to not know. To pretend to not know anything. To pretend that the thief he saw on the rooftop that day isn't someone he knows even though he's so painfully aware of it. It's only fair that way.

Ren took another deep breath, swallowing hard as he prepared to open the letter, setting aside the box with the monocle still inside by the window sill.

His heart skips a beat at the sight of his name, written by Kaito's hand.

“Dear Renren,” it starts, “How are you? Knowing you, you probably didn't open this letter until months had passed, I bet! ”

Ren quietly chuckled at that, he was right. Kaito was always too good at reading people. “That's alright though, I won't blame you because I'm such a gentleman,” A small face was drawn there, it looked like Kaito smirking at him, how cute. “I'm sure you've already seen the other item in the box, it was right on top of the letter you're reading now after all! ” He drew a monocle then. Ren held his breath as he read through the next passage.

“What I'm about to tell you, is a confession of a secret! You can't tell anyone about this! This is our own little secret.” A winking Kaito was drawn there, adorable. Ren giggled as he whispered to the wind, to himself, and to the Kaito that wrote the letter.

I promise.

“I'm Kaito KID.” Party poppers were drawn on both sides of that phrase, confetti doodled around it, he really was adorable… “Although… I had a feeling you already knew about this.”

He really was good at reading people.

“It's so anti-climactic doing this on paper too. I wish I could tell you in person instead, I'd love to see your reaction.”

Ren's breath hitched then. His mind slowly drawing a blank, please be safe, please be safe, please be safe. He repeated in his head. Like a chant, a good luck charm, filled with the hope burning his chest, threatening to explode.

“Renren… I know this is kinda cliche but by the time you're reading this, I probably didn't make it after all.”

Ren gripped the paper tightly then, and immediately let go. He shouldn't… ruin Kaito's letter. There was… there was still more to read through… A prank, maybe, a mistake perhaps, please let this be a nightmare he can wake up from. Ren took a deep breath, gathering himself to continue reading once more.

“Hey, Renren, I may not be there while you're reading this but I can tell you're sad right now! Come on, turn that frown upside down! You know I don't like seeing you sad, right…?

…I'm sorry.”

Ren inhaled sharply, pinching the bridge of his nose to stop the urge to cry growing deep inside him, like a dam waiting to burst, a pipe waiting to break, a heart waiting to shatter. It took him a moment to continue reading it.

“I know, I know... there's a lot of questions you want to ask right? And I… I don't think I can answer any of it, after all...

Hey, Renren… How about a magic trick? It'd be hard to pull this off in a letter but here! ” In the next part, four cards were drawn face down, or rather, drawings of four small face down cards were partly glued to the paper, a small tape keeping it shut. “Pick one!”

Ren reached for the second card, carefully peeling off the tape, behind it revealed an 'Ace of Hearts'. Ren bit his lip then, to stop it from trembling.

“Hehehe, You chose the second card, didn't you? And no! Before you start thinking, 'it doesn't matter what card I pick, all of them is the same.' Well, then mister! You can open the other cards to double check it! I assure you that they aren't all the same! ”

And so Ren did. He carefully peeled off the tape from the rest of the cards.

The first card revealed an “I”

The third card revealed a “You”

The fourth card revealed a “Forever”

The last card, was stained with a droplet.

The droplet, was accompanied by another then.

Ren couldn't stop himself anymore. He put the letter on the window sill, slowly, carefully, with a trembling hand, he reached for the box, brought it on top the letter as weight. He reached inside it, for the monocle for him to hold, to steady his trembling hands. Ren sobbed, quietly, soundlessly, he cried in silence so as to not disturb anyone.

“…Ren?”

But that was all in vain at the sound of Morgana's voice.

“Are you… crying?! What happened?! What's wrong?!” Morgana shot upright at the realization, immediately running to Ren's side. Ren couldn't really answer him even if he wanted to, so Morgana looked around for answers. He didn't need to look far.

He stared at the box, at the letter, and at the monocle Ren was clutching. It was enough.

“…Oh.” Morgana's ears drooped and twitched, he didn't quite know what to do, Ren's cries makes his heart ache, he wanted to comfort him but how? Grief isn't so easily comforted. After thinking awhile, Morgana settled upon sitting beside Ren. “I'm… I'm here for you, okay?”

Ren couldn't answer still, but he was grateful for it. Grateful for Morgana, grateful that there's someone there for him while his world was breaking. Kaito was so unfair… selfish…

. . .

Seconds passed, and then minutes, Morgana had found where the tissue box is and moved it near Ren, he had found a water bottle nearby too, placing it just beside the tissue box. Minutes passed, and then hours. The empty trash can that Morgana moved near Ren as well now contained tissues, the water bottle that was once full was nearly empty. And the quiet cries that filled the room turned into quiet sobs.

Morgana rubbed Ren's back with his paw, in hopes of comforting him further. Until finally, Ren calmed down. Enough to take deep breaths to compose himself.

“…Thanks…” He whispered, voice hoarse.

“Mn… How are you feeling now?”

“…Tired.” Ren glanced at the letter.

“Why don't you wait until tomorrow to continue reading it?” Worry was evident in Morgana's voice.

He should, he really should just wait a bit before reading again, that fit of crying made him tired enough to want to sleep already but… He wanted to finish reading it tonight.

Ren gazed out the window, he stared at the sky, as dark as it was that faithful night. He stared at the stars flickering on and off, he remembered the split second he saw the stars reflected in the eyes of that magician as he turned to face them. He stared at the moon, peeking through the buildings, it was a full moon, much like that night. The view of the moon behind a mysterious magician donned in a white suit and top hat with a cape flowing behind him. It was a magical sight that Ren will remember no matter how much time has passed.

Ren took a shaky breath. He reached for the letter, the monocle in the other hand.

“I'm sorry…” Ren's eyes stung, “I deserved to be yelled at right now, you can call me unfair, and selfish, and stupid! You can shout it to the sky, I'll be sure to hear it. But Renren…

Ren. I wanted to tell you how I felt, because I doubt I'd have a chance to say it to you if not now. I'm sorry, maybe I should've told you about it before… this. But then I think, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself for hurting you way more than how you're hurting now, all because of me. Just know that, I love you, and I want the best for you, even if I'm not around you anymore, even if I'm not there anymore. I'll always love you forever and ever! All the times we spent together were the most precious memories I have… Well, had.

Hey, Renren… Promise me you'll find someone else to make you happy, alright? Someone, something, anything! I want you to be happy. You better be looking up at the night sky with a smile! I'll be sure to see it.

I love you, Ren.”

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

If you've never heard an LRAD go off in person, I *genuinely* do not want to hear your opinion about methods of resistance in the US.

[herrmit]

not to start shit but. tell me you didn't understand princess jellyfish without telling me you didn't understand princess jellyfish

[lottieurl]

yellowjackets "pilot" & "friends, romans, countrymen" // becket or the honour of god by jean anouilh

[pandora15]

I’ve had a lot of people I just met asking me things like “what is your dream?” or “what do you hope for this year?” And I can’t bring myself to answer the question honestly to them because the answer is “I just want my friend to come back.”

But she won’t.

And I don’t want to go into it and explain why the past few months have been so hard, especially to people I literally just met two weeks ago. I also don’t want to bring down the mood so much, even though every little thing I do or see reminds me of her. Every single day, something causes my breath to catch, and I just see her — in the green of the leaves, the coolness of the wind, the hint of a smile on another person’s face.

I just want her to come back, so even when I’m being asked to talk about my dreams, I already know they’re impossible.

[threegunbrainrot]

Brutal things that i have been shocked to see happen period, but also completely uncensored in trimax (so far)

legato forcing someone to hole punch his own chest then rip out his heart, arteries + veins in full view

the first of the gung-ho-guns basically crucified but on steroids

the cyclops chucking herself off a building

knives' BIRTH?????????? what ever happened to regenerating in the soup. what do you mean he's REBORN. he has ENOUGH MOMS. GIVE ONE TO VASH.

[definitionofacritter]

Something about Fjord in this episode. He is so... discontented. About everything.

He has lost strength in his faith to the Wildmother in her silence. He is haunted (and once again hunted) by his past with Uko'toa (Uko'toa). He is ill at ease when captaining his ship. He has no confidence, no direction. Even his house, its size and clutter and color, is a weight on him.

Jester is trying so hard to keep him afloat. She's reassuring about Uko'toa, encouraging about the Wildmother. But her smile gets a little bit smaller every time he turns back to his melancholy.

I'm not sure if I heard a single positive word out of him that entire episode. I empathize with it, I understand it, but god, it hurts. And I really, really hope that gets turned around in part 2.

[thanatosaria]

sath dancer glam complete! 💗

[thyandrawrites]

Me, making a ship playlist: haha, this song doesn't exactly Fit them as they are in canon but it's a scenario I've seen so often in fics it reminds me of them. Wouldn't it be fun if I added it. What's the harm in that. This playlist is for me after all

Me, later, having just read a great but painful fic with that exact same plot, unsuspectingly putting on the ship playlist and experiencing that song again: wow. rude. op is a savage. (I am op)

This is thyandra on thyandra violence