#house of leaves mentioned

[bietrofastimoff23]

In the book, the loyalty of the greens to each other was one of their best traits.

Aegon agreed to become king to protect his family, and demanded the coronation himself, without trying to escape. Helaena was crowned with her husband and had influence over him when she dissuaded him from the dangerous idea of attacking the DS. Aemond wanted his brother's crown, but he never thought of stealing it for himself. Daeron refused to believe in Aegon's death and even threw wine in the face of the man who offered him to take his brother's place on the throne. Alicent never showed pity for her enemies, wanting to bathe in the blood of her grandson's murderer's family, cursing rhay and devaluing the lives of strong bastards, and after Aegon's death, she even tried to kill the newly-made king first with her own hands and then with her granddaughter's hands.

but the show and the rumors around it disappoint me.

Helaena is not crowned and turns away from her husband in front of everyone, although she knows that this is their only chance to protect their children. according to the rumors, Aemond will allow the thought of betraying his brother. Daeron is still missing. and Alicent... there's not even anything to say, everything is too sad no matter how you look at it.

this is not a free interpretation or introduction of semitones. this is just a disrespectful letter out of fear that the green team will surpass the black team in the eyes of the audience. sad. very sad.

[inkskinned]

im having a particularly terrible night with urges and imagery that i dont know how to handle. i gave in to some things. held back on some others. but im barely holding on, dear internet stranger.

you do not owe me your time or your words.. but if you could write some hope into existence for me.. i would be unendingly grateful to you.

please. tell me how you do it. tell me how you survive. because im not so sure i can get through the fifteen days it'll take to get to my seventeenth birthday.

could you please give me something to place my faith in? i dont think the universe is watching out for me anymore.

i don't usually answer these, because i am not a professional, and you deserve professional help. when i was 17 i was terrified of the idea of professional help, because my household was extremely unsafe, and made it clear that if i ever chose to get help, i would be punished for it.

i hope this is not your case. i hope that you can call someone, and they can take you where you should go.

but i will give you the advice that i wish i got, when i couldn't get help at 17, when i was so bad that years later, i literally don't-know-how-i-survived it: what you want is peace, not death. your brain is sick. it has romanticized an ending where there are no consequences. where effort isn't necessary. where you can just... forget.

you want peace. that is a normal, human thing to want. maybe it feels more like you want quiet. or just... to take a break for a second.

here is what i will say: to end yourself means you never get to experience what it's like to actually be happy. i thought i knew what it was like, and i was bitter about it. i'd say - i've been happy, it's not worth it, because i didn't know what i was missing. i thought that happiness meant having a partner or having a job or money or a college degree. it sounded like effort. it sounded like something that had to happen to me.

for the first time in my life, just this week, i was able to go to a concert and just-enjoy-it. no liquor, no drugs. just stomping my feet and getting caught up in it. i didn't feel nervous or self-conscious or overwhelmed. i just had a good time. these days have a lot of these firsts for me - it is the first time i can eat cake without crying. it is the first time i can be around an exacto blade without supervision. it is the first time i have too many people to call when i am crying.

i can't tell you where you'll run into happiness, only that, for me, it started once i was out of that fucking house. it started once i figured out where the pain was coming from. once i figured out that i was not possessed, something medical was wrong with me. that i am not stupid or lazy, i have depression and adhd. the first few years were difficult. at 19, during my efforts to recover, i actually got worse by a considerable margin. and then, with time and patience - i got better.

happiness doesn't feel like what you think it will. in movies it's so golden and all-encompassing. but it doesn't fly into your hands when you buy your first car nor does it arrive in the arms of a partner nor does it require passing your classes. happiness came to me on a tuesday in the form of a red-winged blackbird, and i looked at her, and she looked at me, and i said - oh. the whole world suddenly filled itself in with color. like i had been forever-asleep. like every corner of every room was suddenly glistening.

it ended quickly, back then. it just stopped in to check in on me. but it was enough - this thing i had never experienced, but that i knew (logically) could happen. before that, i was only staying because it would make my mom sad if i died. that was my only reason. and then the happiness came, so strange and brilliant and lovely that for years i couldn't even look at it directly.

these days, things are so different. life is so much easier. i don't wish for death because so much of what i have is already at peace. my boss understands when i need a mental health day. people in general are less prone to high school drama. entire communities hold my hand and have my number. i have a car and a dog and a little apartment garden and candles on all available surfaces and today i bought myself a little cake just-to-celebrate-nothing. my body is my own and we are both dancing.

there are so many things i've gotten to taste in the last 10 years. i know, for you, that is an eon, because it's more than half of your life. but if it helps? in the 5 years between 17-21: i filled myself with laughter and love. i got to be a lead in a ballet and got my first tattoo and then my second and pierced my ears the way i'd wanted to (one of them professionally the other over a hot stove with a potato) and i discovered hozier is my favorite singer (i know. he was new back then) and i got my first real job and my first real paycheck and i hadn't ever been seen as smart but then i started to actually treat my adhd as a condition rather than a burden and people started saying you're like the smartest person in the room and my best friend met her husband who i will one day stand next to as maid of honor when he is her groom and i got to help people and make a stupid blog called "inkskinned" and find out that writing is actually my passion and that maybe i'm actually kind of good at it if i just practice and i got to meet my parents' dog (his name is kaiju) and i slept on couches and kissed people and tried new things and learned how to breathe without feeling my chest tighten and that peace is here, on this planet, that peace echoes everywhere, it is in my hair and my homework and my houseplants, it is quiet and divine and mine because i fought for it and i built it and yes i lost hair over it but holy shit the whole world feels like it is shifted through a sunbeam

recently someone asked me if i could go back in time to 6th grade, with all the knowledge i have now, would i? and without thinking, i barked absolutely not. i know i should say it's because i wouldn't want to risk losing any of this stuff - but really it's because i would never survive being a teenager again. it sounds incredibly lame and impossible, fake - but being a teenager was the hardest thing i ever did. i had no voice, no control, only fear and hatred.

but i did survive it. nothing about me is special. nothing about me is stronger than you or better prepared or more efficient. i didn't survive it perfectly. i made a lot of mistakes and lost a lot of friends and harmed myself in ways that i'm still recovering from. but i did survive it. and there is a part of me looking at you in the past and saying - i'm you in the future.

and holy shit. every day. every goddamn day i'm glad we survived to see the rest of it. because you hit 18 and everything changes. like, everything. and holy shit, it is infinitely worth it.

[simpfornegan]

jacemond celebrity au where they’re married and constantly making bedroom eyes at each other across the room in interviews…

[findmeinthefallair]

*eats recycled cardboard* Won't be the last time they both experience suicidal ideation too T_T

[codacheetah]

This specific dialogue interests me because it feels like the closest thing we get to a direct correlation between the True Ending and Loop giving up. I mean yea obviously the True Ending is literally the "TRUE ENDING" of SASASAP there was even a whole dialogue change to twohats in the latest update to super canonize it for the people who didn't get it. But the way this is phrased (as the direct progression of "something terrible" into "i'm here") makes me think that Loop waking up in that meadow again directly led into them making their second wish.

[kisulandia]

Leshy reading

textless under cut

[swordmaid]

i am wide awake thinking about that post canon jb au again when I should be sleeping …!!! such is the nature of the jbrainrot…

[royaltea000]

I bet he gets the worst pregnancy cravings known to man

[kalgalen]

I love you fake movies i love you stories that never happened i love you lies for the sake of entertainment

[startledstoat]

Friendly reminder that both sirius and regulus have empty graves

If they even have graves at all

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

Book Haul!: I Am Not Immune To Buy 3 Get 1 Free Sales.

These have all been on my list for a while--I knew the bookstore would have the Jemisin and Jackson books for sure (I'd seen them both there before), and I was hoping they'd have Chronister in paperback (because they had her in hardback). I was glad Turnbull was out in paperback, too! What a delightful evening of book shopping!

[cowboy-kidd]

Caregiver!Bumblebee Moodboard

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(there will always be headcannons in tags 🦇💕)

// pt - dni: nsfw accounts //

[wineredsea]

drizzt really is living through the most agonizing situations anyone could imagine and I am here screaming and kicking my feet over house baenre

[ohitslen]

Part two of the thing and uuh also final one

Of this interaction. Because this is far from all I can give, my brain almost imploded from all the ideas

[skunkes]

going to be trying to fully organize/clean my room soon (maybe) and why's getting rid of stuff so hawrd like what if i really really want to reread thru books i read in middle school someday

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

explain to me why if I wear a pair of fingertip-length shorts my mom barely lets me out of the house and acts like I'm being horribly immodest to the point that she'll argue with me about it but if I wear a dress the same length or even shorter she's all over it telling me how cute it is and I should wear it more