#hq songfic

[thesquareinthecircularhole]

take her off your hands [Haikyuu!! Kuroo Testurou x F!Reader]

im unhinged, at work, exhausted, consuming an energy drink, and listening to country music.

unedited and i typed Kuroo and Kurro almost every time

the dude is [derogatory] here

Song: Take Her Off Your Hands by Midland

Character: Kuroo Testurou from Haikyuu!!

female reader

There's a Saturday night, Saturday lights

The work week is exhausting, especially if you are in a career that doesn't allow for weekends off (I'm looking at YOU retail). Fortunately for our main man Kuroo, his job allows him the occasional weekend off. This being one of them. A lovely Saturday night in Tokyo allowed the clubs to be boppin, and he found himself in one with a few friends from work. When you don't have to work the next day, you let the drinks flow, and that is precisely what he was doing. At the bar, he stopped dancing long enough to take a long chug of the water he ordered between fruity drinks and shots. He allowed himself a look around the bar, and that is when he saw her.

And I’m watchin' her, watchin' him watchin’ ice Just meltin' his drink, and I can't help but think If she was with me, she'd be all I could see Oh, but he's just lookin' 'round the room

God, was she pretty. Her [h/c] hair done in a quick little, and slightly messy, updo for dancing. A short black dress with gold accented flowers along the side catered to her body and curves nicely. She wore matching gold heels, which if Kuroo was to guess, would not be staying on all night. But they complimented her legs and build in a way that made his mouth water. She was leaning against the bar, her arms around the arm of a man sitting down at the bar, drinking a dark beer. She seemed to be attempting to get his attention, but from the far out look on the dude's face, it was not going to be happening. This dude, as Kuroo dubbed him in his head, was looking around the club focusing on nothing and everything, except for her.

'If that was me', Kuroo thought, 'I wouldn't take my eyes...or hands...off her all night'. Perchance if reading his thoughts, she looked around the room and locked eyes with Kuroo. Pretty [e/c] eyes highlighted by eyeliner and long, elegant eyelashes. He tipped his drink in her direction and gave the little smirk that gets most girls going. She gave a shy smile and looked away after a moment, back at the dude. 'I'm not having that', Kuroo thought to himself finishing the drink and putting it back on the bar for the bartender to take at his convenience. He sauntered over to the couple.

I'm over here watchin’ a fool who don’t know that he's wastin’ his chance Hey mister, could I cut in for a dance? You don't know what you've got if forever's just not in your plans Let me take her off your hands

"Hey, I'm Kuroo. Could I interest you in a dance?" He said, getting close to her. She bit her lip and batted her eyelashes lightly. The dude with her continued to stare off in the distance, and didn't even notice when she removed her arms from his.

"I'm [Y/N], I'd love to dance." She took Kuroo's extended hand who then swirled her into him and guided the two into the middle of the dancefloor. They swayed with the music, something upbeat that you couldn't quite make the words out to do to the overpowering amount of bass shaking the whole club.

Kuroo moved his head closer to hers as they danced together, chest to chest with fingers intertwined. His mouth was practically against her ear as he said, "That your boyfriend or something?"

"Not so much anymore. This was supposed to be a rekindling, but he's fucked out on something and I can't be bothered to care anymore." [Y/N] said, a slight pout with her bottom lip jutting out. If Kuroo were to describe it, he'd call it kissable.

"Seemed like you cared a couple moments ago," he said, not pointing out but implying from the time her arms were around the dude.

"Yeah well then a handsome gentleman reminded me of other things life has to offer." Her smile was coy and it made Kuroo's heart skip a beat as a matching smile dawned on his face.

And oh, a girl wants to be swept off her feet She didn’t put that dress on to be a Nobody man, short on romance Too blind to give her even a second glance Oh, but he's still lookin' 'round the room

"You think I'm handsome?" He says, the smile much more of a smirk now. She laughed, throwing her head back. 'I could spend the rest of my life making her do that', he thinks to himself.

"I also said you were part of what life has to offer, which I think is the larger compliment."

"I'm trying not to inflate my ego to much tonight. Besides, I'm nothing special standing next to you." She blushes at that. You know that feeling with the incredibly hot person says you're hotter than them? Yeah that's the vibe.

He spins her around again and catches a glimpse at the dude, who is nursing a slightly lighter shade of brown beer, eyes scanning the room in an entirely unfocused manner. Kuroo understands what [Y/N] meant by fucked out on something, the hazy look in his eyes suggested a whole lot of weed. He remembered reading something about weed causing a depersonalization order when you smoke to much of it, doing research for Kenma who mentioned smoking once or twice. Kenma called him paranoid and said he didn't smoke enough to cause a problem, but deep down inside appreciated that his friend was looking out for him.

"In a way, I'm glad you gave him a second chance. If you didn't I might've not been able to sweep you off your feet in this club tonight." Kuroo says, instantly dropping her into a dip. The rise in her heart rate, she couldn't tell if it came from the dip or the man. She agreed with his sentiment though. Not one for love at first sight, she did believe in "god damn I've gotta spend more time with this man" at first sight.

As she rises from the dip, her arms move up, around his neck, playing with the hair at his nape. His arms wrap around her waist, connecting his fingers at the small of her back. They continued dancing to the music, occasionally making small talk and getting to know each other. Hours and hours passed, the duo only leaving the dancefloor to get drinks.

"Want to come back to my place?" Kuroo whispered huskily in her ear. [Y/N] pondered for a moment. She did just meet the guy, but she technically did have a boyfriend, but it wasn't going to last past tonight anyway. Her contemplation was answered by a quick tap on her shoulder.

"Hey," the dude started, "I'm headed home. Are you coming with?" He asked. She blinked at him, once, then twice, surprised by the audacity.

"You won't have to worry about her anymore," Kuroo said, with his signature smirk, "Let me take her off your hands."

[r4zberrygirl]

✧haikyuu masterlist

fluff ♡ angst ꩜ songfic ♬

✧Akaashi Keiji

♡♬ Checkmate, I couldn’t lose -collegeAU!akaashi x gn!reader

✧Miya Atsumu

꩜♬ Mr. Superior Thinkin’ -timeskip!atsumu x gn!reader

✧Oikawa Tooru

꩜♬ right where you left me -timeskip!oikawa x gn!reader ♡♬ drunk in love -timeskip!oikawa x f!reader

✧Hinata Shoyo

♡♬ I dont want you like a best friend -timeskip!hinata x reader

tba...

[sataraxia]

you're losing me.

miguel o'hara x fem!reader

summary: 'you're losing me' by taylor swift.

genre: angst, so much angst. basically a songfic.

warnings: cursing, violence, hard violence at the end, the reader shows signs of bpd. it "continues" the across the spiderverse plot.

a/n: i wanted to do this for a while now, i'm a fluff fan but a taylor swift one first. english isn't my first language so pls let me know my mistakes.

w.c: 13.2k

You have been with Miguel for more than a while now, just without a confirmation in between, there was never an "I love you", much less an " I’m sorry", but you two knew it, you cared for each other, and it would always be like that, no need for words.

But it was later that you really got to know the man you loved unconditionally.

You say “I don’t understand and i say, “I know you don’t”

“Love, you’ve been with that for a whole week, don’t you think it’s time to stop?” you said with no more than sweetness and care in your voice.

He didn’t say anything, not even look at you.

“I know that it’s important, but you haven't been eating, or sleeping well.” letting out a sigh, you tried to approach him. “I'm going out on a long mission tomorrow, you know, we could get dinner, or something.”

“I don’t understand how you could think that getting dinner is more important than this, and you should be working too, get out.” it was like he had put a wall between you two, ‘cause you didn’t dare to get closer than you were.

And it’s been like that for some time now, since the events of earth 1610, he’s been a workaholic, but you could take it, you always could.

“We thought a cure would come through in time..”

You’ve been out on this mission for almost three weeks, you missed your friends, missed Miguel, ‘cause maybe, just maybe, he was being himself again.

Of course not. When you arrived at the HQ, more specifically his office, the first thing you saw of him was a man yelling at a kid that a citizen was supposed to be dead, and the same fate was meeting the kid’s father.

The thing was, you didn’t really enjoy talking about canon events with Miguel, because you don’t like the term, in fact, you hate that he invented a word that justifies all the pain you, and everyone here, endured.

You wanted to do something, help Miles, but your thoughts were blurry, knowing that every decision you take from now on can change everything with Miguel.

“..now I fear it won’t.”

“Remember lookin’ at this room, we loved it ‘cause of the light.”

The chase after Miles already started, and you just stood there, while every other Spider-Man was trying to capture a kid.

You wanted to scream, most likely to the man who gave the order, but you had to stay on his side, right? 

At least that was what your body wanted, ‘cause suddenly you were in the platform, the one where Miguel had brought you everytime you were injured, where you had your first kiss and the so many more that followed.

You didn’t even think about it, you started helping Miguel telling him where you saw Miles in the cameras, opening the path for him.

“Now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it’s time.”

This was the man you’ve fallen for? the one that was hitting a kid, telling him that he shouldn’t even exist? you knew part of his behavior was because of his feral instincts, but trying to justify this was making you sick.

You saw how Miles was running for his life, feeling betrayed by his own people, hurting like hell just wanting to come home to his parents, that’s when it hit you, you couldn’t do this.

He reached the machine that would send him “home”, you could hear your lover yelling at you from the ear piece that you two shared “Shut it off! Come on!”.

“Do I throw out everything we built or keep it?”

Your thoughts were colliding in your mind, the typical “my heart wants something but my brain another” line sounding everywhere.

But time took the choice for you, Miles was already gone and you didn’t do anything to stop it, nothing came from the other side of the communicator, but you’ve never heard a silence quite this loud.

The fear that you were experiencing right now was almost unrecognizable. almost.

“I’m getting tired even for a phoenix, always rising from the ashes”

It was the same fear that you had the day he found you.

Like every other spider person, you had been through a lot, but it came to a point where your family didn’t acknowledge you anymore, the only friend you had died because of you.

So, you’ve always known you were a failure, thinking about it now, maybe the relationship you’ve built with Miguel it’s just because he was the first person that didn’t see you as one.

It was hard at first, learning that everytime your parents insulted you, all the times that you were punished by them, all they took from you, all that was supposed to happen, hell, it had to be like that.

With time, and with Miguel by your side, you grew comfortable in your position, you could stay with him forever, just like he promised all the times you crawled to him after a bad day or a bad memory. forever, right? 

“You might just have dealt the final blow.”

You were facing each other, he was always taller than you, but right now, you feel like the smallest thing in the world, you’ve known this feeling, and you don’t want that to happen with him.

But it was too late to want and not want things.

“Why didn't you do it? It was a simple button.” his voice was raspy, probably from all the yelling before, but he’s being cautious with you, the feeling in your stomach confirms it.

“I didn’t think like it was the right thing.” you didn’t tremble, he knows that you need him, but he also knows the woman you are.

“What?” that was it.

Silence, it could have been just seconds, but it feels like eternity to you, maybe because eternity was beautiful in your eyes, and what he started to say, definitely not.

“It’s incredible how after all this time, all of the effort I put on you, you show up to be just a disappointment, i don’t care what you think.”

“Stop.” he didn’t mean it, he didn’t mean it.

“Stop, you’re losing me.”

“No, you dont get for me to stop, I've always been there for you, I saved you again and again for you to turn your back on me? really?” you could feel the anger in his voice.

“Miguel, it's not like that, stop.” a little steps to get closer, you needed him closer.

“Stop, you’re losing me.”

“It is like that, it's always like that, you always fail and let me down, you don’t care about the real things because you’re stuck to keep suffering for some stupid thing that happened to you years ago, i'm tired of you being a nuisance to me.”

“My heart won’t start anymore..”

“What?” now it was your turn, without letting the tears take over your face. “I’m a nuisance? And what about you? the only thing you’ve been doing is watching on that little screen something that you could never have again, holding on to the memory of your mistakes, jealous that a kid can know beforehand and actually do something about it!” you know you don’t mean this, you know his suffering, but this was just too much.

“What I do is my business, but you work for me, you have to do what I say.” his tone wasn’t cautious anymore, his words were as thin as a dagger, was it always like that for him?

“I don’t work for you, i’m your-” he cut you off, almost instantly.

“You’re nothing to me.” he didn’t look at you when he said that.

“..for you.”

“What are you gonna do to that kid?” your voice was kinda broken, but you glared at him with storms in your eyes.

“Whatever is necessary to avoid him destroying a whole universe.”

“And the air is thick with loss and indecision.”

“Then I'm gone.” you turned away, he didn’t say anything, he didn’t look back.

He didn’t care if you were gone, he was letting you go just this easy, when your whole body was screaming at you that you should crawl to him, beg for his care and for his love, like you always did.

“Now you’re running down the hallway, and you know what they all say..”

That night, Miguel went to his room, that was yours too, expecting to find you a crying mess, it was always like that, you two had argued before, and he knows that he can fix this, by fixing you.

Opposite of his imagination, you weren’t there, all that was left was all your stuff, the clothes that he loved seeing you wearing, the gifts that he made, the ones that you made, all of it was there, but not you.

He forgot what fear was like, until he saw the little note you had left behind for him.

“i love you.”

It was the first time that one of you “said” that, and he hated it, hated his vulnerability, hated the short tear that was crossing his jaw now, but mostly, he hated you, for making him feel all of this and being gone.

“You don’t know what you got until it’s gone.”

“My heart won’t start anymore (‘cause you’re losing me).”

It had been three months now, you were helping Miles and his band, they were your friends now and they cared for you.

Mostly Gwen, you talked to her a lot, and she’s been helping you with your feelings.

You were miserable, you hated this so much, hated him so much.

The truth was that you were dying to go with him, you were so attached that it was completely painful, and you were fighting with yourself every day.

Because not matter how much you loved Miguel, you were on your own now, and you had the right to think and act for yourself, so if that means you have to be against him, even fight him, then you were going to do it.

That was what you said to yourself, but when the moment came, when all of your friends were fighting against the corporation you helped build, when the love of your life was in front of you, claws and teeth out, you were paralyzed.

“‘Til we were too far gone to bring back to life”

He was getting closer and closer, and some part of you was hoping that this was the man that didn’t even need words for you to know he loved you, the man that you would give up on your life from, you would do anything or everything for the things to go back to how they were.

“I gave you all my best me’s, my endless empathy.”

And that thought alone bothered you, why would you do everything for a man that was about to kill you if necessary? you were done with this.

You threw the first punch, as it was unexpected, he didn’t block it at all.

“And all I did was bleed as i tried to be the bravest soldier.”

“I’m not afraid of you.” your voice didn’t come off as he expected, you weren’t fragile anymore.

And so it began, he was a fighter and he wasn’t containing, you were hurt but you didn’t stop,for now you were blocking his claws and pushing him towards a kind of factory in the city, the farther away he was from Miles, the better.

“You’re not gonna kill a child Miguel, I'm not letting you.” he didn’t even care to respond, god how you hated that he wasn’t giving any signal of regret in all of this.

“You can still come with us, with me, you know?” of all the things he could’ve said, he chose that.

“Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don’t you ignore me.”

You didn’t respond, he kept talking.

“You are my best soldier, come on.” you were under him, he could finish this right now, you were bleeding and sore, he was too.

“I’m the best thing at this party (you’re losing me).”

The only reason you couldn’t hate him was the memories of what you had, but that, the attitude that he has on top of you, like your life was only in his hand, that he was portraying himself as your forever savior, you were boiling with rage.

You moved as fast as you could, pushing him off of you with the studies you had collected of fighting beside him, now you were on top, hitting at him with blood nubling your “pretty eyes” as he called them.

With that, he understood there was not a turning the situation, this was it, this is how it’s gonna end.

He grabbed you with all his strength and started shoving your body against the columns in the old fabric, along with this, he was telling you how disappointed he was, villainizing you for leaving him alone.

You couldn’t hear due to the damage.

“And I'm fading thinking do something, babe, say something.”

Blow comes, blow goes, you weren’t thinking of what you were doing, you were so mad that he wasn’t saying something, that he prefers this before taking the risk of believing in you.

“I hate you.” you thought about every time, how he manipulated you, how he controlled every feeling and idea in your head, and you hated how much you would love to stop this and go back to that.

“Lose something babe, risk something.”

He wasn’t fighting back anymore, the floor was cold and every punch that touched his skin made him feel warm.

He was regretting everything, he didn’t care about Miles now, he didn’t care about another universe anymore, he only cared about you, the universe of his own.

“I did everything for you, I would've died only for you, I would've even killed Miles for you, and I think I would still do it if you just choose me!”

You were letting it all out, not even listening to the voice of the man under you.

“Choose something, babe, i got nothing to believe, unless you’re choosing me.”

You were tired, couldn’t throw anymore hits, and that’s when you noticed, he was barely breathing under you, mumbling some words that you haven’t heard.

Your body didn’t move, you freezed.

“Stop, you’re losing me.”

Miguel used his last strength to clean some of the tears that were traveling down your cheek, you could now hear what he was saying.

“I’m so sorry, amor.” it’s the first time you’ve seen a genuine smile.

“Stop, stop, stop.”

You know there was nothing to be done, and no one could help right now, it was just you and him like it was in the beginning.

“I love you.” you whispered to him, grabbing his hand.

“I love you too.” he closed his eyes.

“I can’t find a pulse, my heart won’t start anymore.”

[ao3feed-twiyor]

As Long As You Love Me

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/nrhb6ds by Ironwoman18 Loid and Yor discovered each other's identities. He took her to WISE HQ to talk but they already love each other and they stopped to care about that as long as they have love. Words: 2624, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: SPY x FAMILY (Anime), SPY x FAMILY (Manga) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/M Characters: Loid Forger | Twilight, Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Anya Forger, Donovan Desmond, Melinda Desmond, Sylvia Sherwood | Handler, Fiona Frost | Nightfall, WISE Agents (SPY x FAMILY) Relationships: Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Anya Forger & Loid Forger | Twilight & Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess & Reader Additional Tags: Secret Identity, Spies & Secret Agents, Arranged Marriage, Married Couple, Family Fluff, Angst, Song: As Long as You Love Me (Backstreet Boys), Songfic read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/nrhb6ds

[oloreandil]

RULES: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have WIPs. tagged by: @blondiest thank you friend <333

for the purpose of not listing an irrational amount of titles, please have stuff i plan to write in the relatively near future:

DN secret satan - m2 - [redacted because they might see]

HQ for Ro - skts - the way i are

DN Misa trop de waouh - au delà des masques

DN meta - near narrative

BATMAN - songfic

i think most of my regular culprits have already been snatched since i now live in a cave ^^' i tag @notsuchasecret / @tasha-lemon / @dominote / @blazednarancia / @mizzmellos / @tatiejosie / anyone who wants to talk about their wips !! no pressure ofc

[chaoticevilorange]

About requests

You can ask about 5 or 6 character

I won't write about:

Dark content

Incest/Stepcest

Yandere material

Noncon/degradation etc

The main reason of why I don't write songfics it's because I have to take the time to analyse the lyrics and pick what character would mostly fit, specially if you ask for the hq boys, there is like 30 of them and usually I separate each one based on some personality treats in 4-5 paragraphs

This blog is mostly about fluff, as you see there is a few works that could be classified as NSFW or even mentioned they are spicy or the characters being horny, but I always warn or mention about the content in general

Most of the fics are for femreader I think, if you want to be gnreader or malereader please let me know!

As a final Read at your own risk (minors or not) but the only risks on this blog are my typos, bad writing and misspellings 🤷🏻‍♀️

[tetsunation]

eleanor & park - sugawara koshi

☁ as far as i know, buses aren’t commonly used for transportation to schools in japan, so just pretend they do ride buses for the sake of the song (which is what i’m basing it off of, not the book). i absolutely hated this by the time i finished writing it LMFAOO but i gotta post something so 

⚠ fem!reader, i didn’t proof read either oops. listen to eleanor & park by beabadoobee and girl in red while reading!

word count: 1.08k i did not mean to make it this long

it wasn’t the sound of that obnoxious alarm cutting through her fatigued mind, nor was it the sluggish way she sulked around the house as she proceeded to prepare for the school day. perhaps it was the way the puffy clouds painted the early miyagi sky, pillows of white floating across a river of orange and yellow pushing its way into a pale blue, or maybe the sound of the birds singing their wakeup calls right before it got too busy. but if there was anything she enjoyed about doing the same few, stressful things five days a week for a year, the morning bus rides took first place. it was easier to believe this than to admit a silver haired boy was the reasoning behind why y/n was immoderately eager to wake up each morning, the soft features of his face peeking behind the grey, blocky seats as she walked up the bus stairs never failed to tug a smile on her lips. 

maybe it was the way he never failed to notice when she was even slightly off base. whether it be a shift in the stars or a failed test, suga would take notice immediately, even if she voiced it or not. the change in his demeanor matched y/n’s as soon as she stepped onto the bus, his empathy showing from the way his pretty lips curled into a troubled pout, slate colored brows furrowing while his eyes followed her frame all the way down the aisle to claim her spot besides him. the most indulgent of what’s wrong?’s rolled off his tongue, nothing but pure concern coating his words. koshi was just that type of boy. y/n didn’t know whether it was intentional or not, but the first time this happened, the other quickly rummaged through his bag and pulled out some comic book he had been reading in his free time. though she wasn’t an avid comic fan, she took it nonetheless. the gesture itself was kind enough, but being that it was from suga made it lots more meaningful. this became sort of a routine for the two: assuming that suga kept a stash of mangas in his bag, he’d pull one out as soon as he noticed a moderate drop in the girl’s happiness. 

of course, the other had already finished reading the volumes he gifted to y/n, and none of them seemed to be in the same series unless she asked specifically, so amidst the groggy, mumbled discussions underneath the start of the sun’s rays, suga’s warm voice made its way right into y/n’s mind, explaining the plot of each comic in an enthusiastic yet hushed tone. it was one thing to hear him speak about something that peaked his interest, the way his widened hazel eyes seemed to gleam with passion, the beginnings of a gentle smile forcing its way onto his face, eliciting always-genuine laughs from his companion. but nothing seemed to compare to the way the words tumbled from his lips: light, but also child-like, never once reaching past a regular speaking voice. each word was well thought out, processed in his mind thoroughly, then coated with honey to ensure it was never harsh. perhaps it was the way she loved his voice, entrancing her with each gentle sentence, enough to smooth out anyone’s worries. 

or perhaps it was his default altruistic nature, each act of affection building up as time passed. one day started off ideal and as normal, underneath the 6am shining sky, when it suddenly took a drastic turn towards noon, light showers turning into heavy rain to which y/n had not prepared for. equipped with nothing but the school’s uniform, she stood at her desk in her final class of the day, eyes trained on the racing of water droplets against the large window panes as she packed. waiting outside of the classroom stood a familiar slender figure, his halo of grey hair even more of a perfect mess today than before. of course, he had noticed y/n hadn’t entered the bus this morning with an umbrella, so here he was with an offer to walk her through the rain.

“are you feeling cold?” suga had asked twice: once on the way to the bus in the afternoon, and again when they had reached y/n’s stop. despite her answering with a quick no, and that he’d risk getting sick in the rain, suga was, with no hesitation, quick to lend her his puffy coat. albeit he had to walk home himself with a sole, thin volleyball jacket, he wasn’t one to back down for y/n either. 

suga had to admit she looked a lot more breathtaking in his clothes than he anticipated, a dull pink dusting his cheeks. “you’re so sweet, koshi.” y/n had gotten up upon the bus coming to a halt at her stop. “i’ll let you know,” she added, still standing in the aisle next to their claimed seat, “you’re the type of guy i’ll never let go.”

or maybe it was the way she felt being secured in his grasp, taking in his natural scent of dull, sweet lavender. “why do you do this?” y/n had once asked. they were four months into the school year already, approximately 14 manga volumes total were exchanged from suga to her, and the presents just kept on coming. she was sure he had begun purchasing new mangas to give away as the condition of the pages progressively got better. this time had been particularly bad, y/n wiped the stray tears from her cheeks with the back of her hand. take me in your arms had suddenly slipped past her lips, partially shocked at her sudden confession, but even more when suga did just that, turning the two to face each other as best as he could in a bus seat, arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders. suga knew he didn’t need to say much, it was a silently passed agreement between them that being in his presence alone was enough, not like he knew exactly what to say either. warmth radiating from his body to hers, the message of his embrace was clear: i’ll never leave you.

“i want you to feel adored," the boy whispered in response, looking down at her with a comforting grin. “i know you don’t have it easy, but you’ll get through it if you’re with me.”

[laceymorganwrites]

Brokenhearts Club: Stone Cold

Word count: 1,626

Pairing: none, Saeko x her husband

Warnings: angst, swearing, heartbreak, unrequited love

Song: Stone Cold - Demi Lovato

Taglist: @vicassa @ashhhh26 @luckypartyranchmug @chaelysian @2o-done @hoho-cham @thatnikkixx @solarskiesdream @mattsuns-prettybaby @moonlightaangel @madusas-girlfriend @d-angerboys @lulu-102 @anejuuuuoy @killmeplz-uwu @serihandfn @atsumubabe​ @chibioomi​ @onlyshinji​

Female reader

Stone cold, stone cold

You have known Saeko all your life. Starting from kindergarten, going to middle school and then to high school together. You were inseparable, far more than just best friends. You two spent so much time at the other´s house that your families already merged together. It was nice, or it would´ve been.

Such strong bonds, such a pure and wonderful friendship, you did everything together, shared everything. Well, almost everything.

But it was normal to keep secrets, wasn´t it? Especially when those secrets could destroy everything you have built over the years.

Well, it was your own fault. You shouldn´t fall for your best friend, that was common knowledge.

You see me standing but I´m dying on the floor

But you just couldn´t stop yourself, Saeko made it too easy.

She was too charming for her own good, too beautiful, too funny, too caring…

If only she liked women.

But then again, even if she did, you´d never be more than just friends.

It was a harsh truth that you realized over the years and the more time passed, the more it manifested.

The best choice would´ve been to break off contact with her to get over her, but how could you?

You´d rather live with your heartbreak than to ever live a life without Saeko in it.

Besides… you´d get used to the dull ache eventually.

That was what you had hoped all these years, an almost extinguished hope you just couldn´t let go no matter how much it hurt.

Maybe all of this made you a masochist.

But you didn´t care.

How could you care when you could see Saeko be happy and smile, fall in love? Even if it was not with you.

Even if it could never be with you. 

Maybe if I don´t cry I won´t feel anymore

You should distance yourself from her, you shouldn´t clutch onto her like she was the only thing keeping you alive. 

But you were too far gone at this point, too much in love, too dependent on her.

If you were to leave, you´d miss her touch and presence more than anything else

You´d always fall back into her arms whenever she hugged you out of joy, despite your heart hurting oh so much, you´d always let her compliment you when shopping together, living in your fantasy world where all of this meant something.

The worst thing was when she got a boyfriend and of course told you everything about it and him in great detail.

He was a great guy, really, you wished them the best, you knew that he could give Saeko everything she deserved and more, everything she ever wanted.

And still.

It wasn´t you.

The thought alone hurt so much it was almost unbearable, it was fucked up. You knew that Saeko was bound to fall in love with a man, you shouldn´t have held onto this false hope, she would never love you the way you loved her.

But you couldn´t control your emotions.

Especially not when she told you that they got engaged, asking you to be her bridesmaid and help her with the preparations.

This was it. The last piece of your heart shattering. 

You´re dancing with her while I´m staring at my phone

However the whole process, watching her be so happy with someone else, it brought you pain you didn´t even know you could feel.

You were with her when she got her dress, the decorations and the cake.

You were with her at every phone call, every important date and you hated it.

But most of all you hated yourself for desperately hanging on.

It was like you were dependent on her.

She was a virus in your life, eating away at all your hope and your fragile heart and you let her because it was so addicting, so ecstatic, so immaculate.

Yes, maybe you became more than a tad bit masochistic because of her.

And so what?

That was your way to cope…

Well, to run away from facing the truth, you desperately tried to hold up the facade of being just friends.

I was your amber, but now she´s your shade of gold

Everything came crashing down on you at Saeko´s bachelorette party.

It was bad enough to plan it, to watch her try on all those outfits that shouldn´t fit so perfectly.

But then again, everything looked so good on her, you realized early on that Saeko simply couldn´t look bad, not even mediocre.

She was always the prettiest in the room.

Everyone´s eyes were on her but there was only one person she returned the favor to.

And it most definitely wasn´t you.

And it never would be.

This fact would always be repeated inside your head and yet it just wouldn´t stick.

It didn´t hurt to dream, right?

Though dreaming didn´t get you anywhere, not that you actually wanted to pursue her.

No.

You´d never do that, her happiness was far more important than your own.

Dreaming about being with her the way you always wanted only hurt you more.

When you arrived at her doorstep after the party was over to say goodbye, every single one of your emotions seemed to overflow.

It was all too much.

Too much pent up frustration and your broken heart screamed bloody murder.

Your head was spinning from the alcohol and you started feeling sick, you were still supporting Saeko who drank way more than you and could barely walk in a straight line.

“I´m getting married tomorrow!” she slurred, laughing loudly and turned around to you with those big bright eyes and you wanted nothing more than to kiss her.

Saeko slipped a bit and fell against you, but you managed to catch her so that you two hugged now.

Your heart started beating faster and you knew you were about to do something stupid, but you couldn´t stop yourself.

“I love you…” you whispered, sounding almost hysterical, your voice strained with the pain of your feelings but Saeko was too drunk to recognize that.

“Aww, I love ya too! You´re my best friend” she hugged you even tighter and it felt like a thousand knives digging into your skin.

You wanted to scream.

God knows I tried to feel happy for you

“I fucking know...you´ll never see me as anything more than a friend and that´s okay, I can´t control who you love, but goddamn, it hurts….I want you to be happy but it hurts to goddamn much…” you thought, unable to stop the tears that were streaming down your face.

Saeko drunkenly smiled at you one last time before shutting the door and falling asleep next to the man who´d be her husband tomorrow.

You were alone in your bed, as always, and unable to sleep.

Nothing new.

The next morning you got up only reluctantly, not wanting this day to happen at all and wanting to get it over with as soon as possible at the same time.

After you were done getting ready and drove to Saeko´s place to help her get ready, you stood in front of her door for a bit before actually entering.

The events of last nights went through your head the whole night and still you were embarrassed even though Saeko didn´t remember any of it.

Instead of looking at you disgusted, she greeted you like usual, hugging you tight and rambling on about how excited she was to finally get married.

You helped prepare everything else that needed to be done and then tried to calm Saeko down as best as you could before sitting down on your designated seat.

Caught in your head you imagined what it would be like to be the one waiting for Saeko instead of her fiance. If only she´d smile at you that way, if only you could embrace her like that, if only the love in her eyes was dedicated to you.

It hurt seeing all of that belong to the luckiest man on the planet who now looked at the beautiful bride walking down the aisle with bright and loving eyes.

The ceremony passed like white noise for you, maybe it was a defense mechanism from your body that prevented your heart from being completely obliterated.

Biting your lip until it was bloody, you tried your hardest to look somewhat happy.

Needless to say, you failed.

You wanted to escape to the restroom and cry your eyes out, but you were frozen in place, stuck, you just couldn´t move.

Maybe you were more of a masochist than you realized.

Everything around you was happening in a fast forward motion and in slow motion at the same time, making you dizzy.

You knew that people were approaching you, talking to you, saying how happy they were for Saeko, but you didn´t respond.

You couldn´t.

It was like you were having the most fucked up and pathetic out of body experience of all.

Your eyes caught Saeko laughing with her husband as they had their first dance.

She looked so beautiful, so happy.

Everything was perfect.

For her.

You gulped, balling your fists and digging your nails into your flesh to stop your tears from falling.

To no avail.

You could feel your eyes burning and ignored everyone who asked if you were okay.

Okay.

When have you ever been okay? You wasted your whole life pining after someone who´d never love you. And that realization hurt. It hurt that you knew all along, but the dire consequences and meaning seemed to be only sinking in just now.

Maybe you wanted to be happy too.

Even if it could never be with her.

If happy is her, I´m happy for you

[dinosaurtsukki]

drops of jupiter | an oikawa x gn!reader one-shot

pairing: oikawa x gn!reader

word count: 2.2k words

contains: slight angst, lots of space imagery, some song references, oikawa can go to space and this isn’t Fully Explained

summary: oikawa had always dreamed of going to space until one day, he floated up to the night sky. ever since then, he’d travel up to space, spending more and more time there while you were left behind on earth.

a/n: i’ve always liked how whimsical this song was and i wanted to make a fic about it. also i’m in love with space nerd!oikawa so much. if you can, listen to the song while reading!

inspired by the song ‘drops of jupiter’ by train (although i love the taylor swift cover)

you’ve known oikawa tooru loved space ever since you were still kids. it wasn’t strange for kids to stare at the sky and wonder about the great outer space. but the look on oikawa’s face was always wistful, as if he was remembering a home that he had never been to.

you’ve loved oikawa ever since you realized what it meant to love. he was synonymous to the feeling of waking up to a new day and the excitement of a friday night. unlike him, you never searched for anything beyond the small town where you lived. you were left wanting for even less when oikawa told you he loved you. you knew he meant what he said. you could tell by how his eyes shone when you laugh and how he held you close every night. but you’d always find him looking to the sky, the same wistful look in his face.

and then one day, he did go to space.

it happened on a warm summer night. you were sitting on the doorstep and watched as oikawa, who was lying on the ground and staring at the sky, began to float. both of you gazed in shock as his body lifted off the ground to hover in the air for a few inches. and then, the few inches grew to a few feet. you ran just in time to take his hand only, to let go as oikawa floated farther and farther up into the sky. his ecstatic voice rang through the night as he realized that he was going to achieve his dream of going to space.

and you were left alone, searching the night sky.

…

“y/n!”

you turned around instantly at the familiar voice calling your name to find oikawa floating down from the sky. it took a while for you to realize that he was real and not a vision. with a gasp, you dropped the sheet you were hanging up on a clothesline and ran straight into his arms. oikawa laughed as the force sent the two of you sprawling on the grass with you on top of him, feeling his warmth and breathing in the smell of his shirt.

“did you miss me?” he grinned up at you. he looked no different from the day he left for space again a year ago. after oikawa’s first time going to space, he came back a week later only to leave again. the length of time when he’d been gone became a few weeks to a few months, to now, a year. every time he returned felt much sweeter especially with how you worried each day that oikawa would no longer come back.

“i missed you,” you nodded, placing his hands on your face as you bit back the question you had always wanted to ask. oikawa grinned, his eyes on you and not anywhere else, and that was enough for now.

…

even before he went to space, oikawa had always been the center of attention at any social gathering. his natural charisma drew people to him and he could talk to anyone about anything. watching him now at the small ‘welcome home’ party you set up for him and his friends, you could see the gravitational pull that caused everyone to almost orbit oikawa. and how couldn’t they? even the neon lights overhead in the town bar seemed to center on him.

“saturn was absolutely amazing! i practically spent weeks gliding across its rings. and don’t get me started on the sunsets mercury,” you heard oikawa tell his one of many stories. even in regular clothes, your boyfriend looked ethereal and bright with the colored lights blooming like nebulas on his skin.

“y/n! there you are!” oikawa grinned, catching your eye from across the bar. you smiled and excused yourself from a conversation with one of your friends and walked to him. he circled a hand around your waist and pressed a kiss to your temple.

“how are you liking your party?” you smiled at him, relishing in the warmth of his arm around you.

“well, i sure miss seeing the human faces,” oikawa joked. everyone around him laughed. “although, not as much as watching the last moments of a dying star. there was this one time i…”

you found yourself tuning out, eyes only on oikawa as you watched him tell his story. anyone could easily say that oikawa was a wonder to behold, a man who had been and seen what lay beyond and was unafraid of anything. but to you, oikawa had always been a wonder: back in high school when you watched him train day in and day out until his serve shot across the court like a comet, back when he dragged you outside to dance in the middle of a storm, back when he’d wake you up with pancakes for breakfast.

iwaizumi, one of oikawa’s best friend, was the one who made you tune back in. “so, when are you going back up there?” he asked, sharing a look with you. just like you, he waited every night for his friend to return.

“hmm, i think in about a week?” oikawa hummed.

“a week?” you turned to him, startled. “but… you just got here two days ago.”

“i know, i know but there’s this astral event that’s supposed to happen just once every few years! it’s a black hole swallowing a star!” oikawa chattered excitedly. “i was only able to get a glimpse of it last time but…” his eyes softened at the look on your face. “you understand, right y/n?”

once again, you bit back the question you’ve been wanting to ask. “sure, tooru,” you nodded.

“thanks, y/n,” he smiled, his hand on your waist rising to rest on your shoulder. oikawa was just like a star: bright, beautiful, but so, so far away.

…

you’ve known oikawa tooru loved space ever since you first met him back when you were still kids. that’s why you also knew that nothing was going to stop him from going back to space whenever he could. and so, the most you could do was to have fun during your last night out with him.

“ahh, this brings back memories,” you sighed, resting your chin in your hands as you gazed around the diner.

“sure does,” oikawa grinned. “remember when we decided to eat that 12-scoop banana split?”

“i do! we had severe brain freezes,” you laughed.

“and our stomachs ached for weeks! i couldn’t look at another ice cream scoop the same way ever again,” oikawa shook his head. you smiled as you noticed that tonight, oikawa easily melded into his surroundings. he wasn’t a star. for now, he was your tooru.

“two slices of apple pie and one vanilla milkshake. with two straws,” the waitress, a kind old woman who had been working at the diner ever since you two were kids, winked at you both as she placed the straws on the place.

“thanks auntie,” oikawa smiled gratefully at her.

“space may be great, but the best apple pie in the galaxy is still served here,” you said, eating a forkful of pie.

“well, not to discredit the fact that this apple pie is amazing, i think there are a whole lot more other exciting things out there,” oikawa shrugged a shoulder.

“an apple pie is exciting in its own way,” you disagreed. “i mean, it’s a recipe that’s been passed down for ages. imagine auntie’s great-great-great grandmother in the kitchen creating this recipe but with none of the kitchen equipment we have now. imagine all the apple pies she created until she decided ‘hey, this is absolutely perfect’. imagine how she’d scrounge up money just to have the ingredients. imagine her daughter or something spending all those hours to learn her mother’s recipe. imagine the sheer multitude of people who have eaten this same pie, how generations of families in our town are united by the very opinion that this apple pie is the best in the galaxy.”

you stopped when you realized that you had been ranting, only to find oikawa staring at you, almost starry-eyed. it made your chest ache to have that look on his face directed at you this time. “w-what?” you stammered.

“i just… remembered one of the many things i like so much about you,” oikawa said softly. just hearing him say that gave you the courage to ask the question you’ve been wanting to bring up.

“did you miss me while you were out there?”

“y/n…” oikawa reached his hand across the table. “of course i missed you.”

“enough for you to stay? just a bit longer?” you asked the question softly. oikawa looked down and bit his lip. you sighed, knowing that you weren’t going to get the answer that you want. quickly, you forked a piece of your apple pie and held it out towards him.

“your pie is getting cold,” you said. oikawa blinked at you, surprised no doubt from the change in topic, before leaning forward and eating the piece of pie. you watched him chew thoughtfully for a few seconds before breaking out into a small smile.

“that is the best pie in the galaxy.”

…

every single time, before he went to back to space, oikawa would feel a knot of unease in his stomach, especially when he heard the sad way you’d say goodbye. oikawa could go to space dozens of times, but would you still be there when he came back? that’s the question he always asked himself.

but, it was so wonderful to be in space. to hop from planet to planet, to streak across the inky blackness hanging on the tail of a comet, to lose himself among the multi-colored clouds of space dust, to float on his back and simply watch the revolutions of planets around the sun and think about how amazing it was to be a part of this cosmos.

oikawa knew that everything on earth should be dull compared to outer space, but with you, there was a slight shine to everything. you could go on for hours about everything from apple pie to the history of the only bowling alley in your town. and everything about you was so real. your smile was as warm as the sunlight that entered through the windows to land on his face in the morning. your laugh as soothing and comforting as the sound of rain hitting the rooftops and windows during a gentle storm. and the way you said his name: so full of love that it made oikawa’s chest ache.

surely, nothing else could compare. except…

“wait, is that what i think it is?” oikawa exclaimed, letting go of your hand and skipping forward to see a streak of light shoot across the sky. and another, and another. enough for him to know that he wasn’t just seeing things. “it’s a meteor shower!” he laughed.

“it is!” you said excitedly beside him. oikawa took your hand and the two of you sprinted off in the direction of the house. it was such a sight to see that both of you ran into a few things while you were busy staring up at the sky, before finally reaching your house. oikawa stood, mesmerized at the meteor shower above that rivaled any fireworks display he saw on earth. once again, he felt that pull, similar to that night when he first went to space, and knew that it would only take a matter of seconds for his feet to float over the ground.

and then, he heard you speak.

“are you leaving already?” you spoke softly. oikawa turned around to find you staring, not at him, but at the sky with a longing, wistful expression on your face. it was an expression he was all-too familiar with and it brought oikawa back to those nights he spent staring at the sky, wondering whether he would be able to see the stars and planets and moons and galaxies for himself. oikawa remembered that longing that made his chest ache every night, and realized that you must have been feeling it too all along.

your arms were wrapped around your shoulders, hugging yourself in anticipation because you knew oikawa was going to leave again. ‘they’re the most beautiful thing i’ve ever seen,’ oikawa realized. and outer space was vast and wonderful and unexplored, but it was also cold and soundless.

to your surprise, oikawa didn’t leave. he stepped closer, wrapping his arms around you and planting a kiss on your forehead.

“tooru..?”

“maybe… maybe i’ll stay a little longer,” oikawa smiled down at you, his hands cupping your cheeks. you swallowed, feeling tears stream down your face from relief and pure joy. oikawa was staying.

“thank you. thank you, tooru,” you sniffed, burying your face in his shirt, arms wrapped around and clinging to him. oikawa held you just as tightly, feeling his feet firmly rooted on the ground. he would miss going to space, but everything out there had existed ever since the dawn of time and would continue to exist for far longer. it could wait. but this moment: the two of you embracing under a meteor shower, could only last now.

omg i forgot to add my taglist again 👁👄👁

taglist (still open to anyone who wants in!): @montys-chaos​ @miyumtwins​ @strawberriimilkshake​ @pocubo​ @sugawara-sweetheart@akaashisbabydoll @laure-chan@therainroguefanfiction@atetiffdoesart@stephdaninja@oikaw-ugh@charliefredb@dramaqueenweeb1469@tremblinghearts@applepienation@doodleniella

[runin-reads]

haikyuu characters as flo milli lyrics

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SONGS USED:  in the party - flow milli,   beef- flo milli,

A/N: this is me just shitposting again, so move on folks nothing to see here ahaha

═══════════════

“Dicks up when I step in the party

Your main dude wanna feel on my body 

Kiyoko, HINATA, Yachi, NOYA, Terushima, SAEKO, Alisa Haiba, Kanoka

And if I take him, bitch I won’t say I’m sorry

I do what I want, don’t report to nobody.”

OIKAWA, Saeko, Atsumu, Terushima

I'm a bad bitch

Don't let 'em tell you (what)

That I'm average (yea)

Ushijima, Sakusa, TANAKA, Noya, Gao, Hoshiumi, BOKUTO, Goshiki, Yaku, 

Family don't like the way that I'm living

But they didn't raise me

So fuck they opinion

HANAMAKI, OIKAWA, Matsukawa, Kunimi, Hinata, Lev, Akaashi, Kyoutani

“Yea he gon' off the perc

Now he raising his meat

I don't think that's a lover that you wanna keep (Huh)”

Kita, Semi, SHIRABU, Sugawara, Iwaizumi, Daichi, Asahi, Alisa Haiba, Kiyoko, Akane, Yachi 

“Cause he give me brain like every other week 

I smoked all his weed And I told him to leave (goodbye)

KUNIMI, SUNA, Matsukawa, Kenma, Futakuchi

“When I see him in public (yea) 

I don't even speak”

KAGEYAMA, SAKUSA, Tsukishima, Kenma, Kunimi, Aone

He watchin' my behavior 'cause he know I'm bad

I do what I please and you do what I ask (Haha)

He love my confidence and that's what you lack

OIKAWA, Kiyoko, Atsumu, SAEKO, YAKU, Akane

Who got beef with me? (I don't know)

Girl, you don't wanna compete

I'm too fast on my feet (Yes, you don't)

And you know where I be

IWAIZUMI, Bokuto, Shirabu, Gao, Hoshiumi, Sugawara, KUROO

Making you mad is my specialty I'm the petty queen I need you to have a seat (Bye)

KUROO, Tsukkishima, Tendou, SUGURU, Oikawa, Atsumu

Who got beef? (Who got it?)

I'm tryna find something to eat

KITA, OSAMU, Kenma, Fukunaga, Suna, Aran, BOKUTO

═══════════════

TAG(S): @scandeniall

═══════════════

[kodzuken-pie]

——————————————————————————

• - 𝑀𝑜𝑟𝑎𝑙𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑦 — ♫

——————————————————————————

Pairing : Agedup!Hajime x fem!reader

Genre : Songfic, angst

Warnings : swearing, verbal abuse, mentions of alcohol consumption

Word count : 2,867 words

—————————————————————��————

“YOU REALLY ARE SUCH A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT YOU KNOW THAT, HAJIME?” She roared out, absolutely fuming.

“Baby, please. We can talk about this.” You tried to coax her and calm her down.

“TALK ABOUT WHAT? YOU BEING SUCH A FUCKTARD? I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE THIS SHIT. YOU ARE SO FUCKING USELESS.” She stormed out, grabbing her keys from the little bowl by the door and making it fall, crashing into a million broken pieces.

You knelt down and picked up the broken pieces carefully, letting out a heavy sigh.

‘How many times has it been just this week?’ You felt empty and numb.

Getting up, you drag your feet through the floor to get to the kitchen. You dispose of the broken pieces and grab the broom to clean up whatever you couldn’t pick up, throwing the ceramic shards away before heading back into your bedroom.

You stood there for god knows how long, just staring at the picture frame on your bedside table.Your lips pressed together in a thin flat line. You want to cry so bad but for some reason, the tears just wouldn’t fall.

‘How many times do I have to feel like this?’ The thought runs through your head.

You walked over to the little table and picked up the frame, sitting down on the bed and running a hand on the glass.

“So I guess I never really knew you, huh? God sure knows I fucking tried to.” You chuckle to yourself, shaking your head.

You moved to lay on the bed, hand still clutching onto the picture frame. The memories of the past six years flood through your mind and you feel your heart twist and turn in your chest. Pain and sorrow ruled these memories, more than love should have. Your eyes close momentarily as you remember the day you two first met.

— — — — - .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. - — — — —

𝙰𝚙𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚒𝚡 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜 𝚊𝚐𝚘.

“Woah.. who is she?” Matsukawa whispered out as she walked in.

You could care less about who just walked in to be honest but your friend's reaction had you curious. So, you looked up and lo and behold. The loveliest woman on earth just walked in through the doors, looking a bit lost. She locked eyes with you and you could see her plump cheeks turn pink.

“Oh, shit. She’s coming over.” Matsukawa sounded like he was panicking.

“Uhm hi!” Of course she sounded like an angel. “I’m new and I’m a bit lost. Is this pre-calc?” She asked.

“Yeah. You can sit with us if you want to.” You said cooly.

And so she did. She took the free space next to you, slowly getting close. You were blindsided by her beauty and you were instantly addicted to her.

— — — — - .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. - — — — —

Now here you were. ’Maybe you should’ve just kept your head down. Maybe if you didn’t talk to her. Maybe if you didn’t meet her gaze. Maybe-‘ You grimaced, eyebrows knitting at your thoughts.

‘How many more times do I have to go through this?’ The feeling of misery ran through you.

You had this feeling, the feeling that you two could do this but deep down inside you knew. You were foolish and in hindsight, it was so painfully obvious.

Your phone lit up and you were graced by a drunk message from her. You unlocked your phone and stared at the message.

”JUST SO YOU KNOW, I NEVER FUCKING LOVED YOU. IN FACT, I FUCKING HATE YOU.”

A heavy pang echoed through your heart. You locked your phone and put it on silent before leaving it face down under your pillow. Your eyes closed and you tried to sleep. To forget for even just a moment that your life was pure hell.

𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚍𝚊𝚢. . .

You fixed your tie as you finished telling them what happened. Clearing your throat as you take in their reaction.

“Holy fuck. Where did you find this girl?” Your lawyer gasped in disbelief, reading the text that was sent to you the night before.

“I don’t know. We were young and well, young people fall in love and it’s with the wrong people sometimes.” The look on your face says it all. “Sometimes some mistakes are made but that’s alright. It’s ok cause you can think that you’re in love but at the end of the day, you’re just in pain. And in the end I know it’ll be better for me cause that’s just the moral of the story.” You said mournfully, the ring under your eyes was dark and heavy.

Your lawyer pats your shoulder. “You need some rest man. Just stay away from her for now, yeah?”

‘How am I going to get through this?’ The pain rushes through you, making your head hurt.

𝙰 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛. . .

You find yourself sitting on the living room couch with her sitting mere inches away from you. The room was uncomfortably quiet. From the corner of your eye, you could see her open her mouth then close almost immediately.

You found yourself scoffing as you looked around. A sweet and sour memory flashing in your mind.

“You know, I find it funny how my memories of us have turned into bad dreams. We were such a wild couple that I didn’t even realize that it was turning so volatile.” You look at the walls that surrounded you, a half smile pulling at your lips. “Do you remember when we painted this house? It was just like how my grandparents did it and a lot of people including me thought it was so romantic but of course that was all on the surface. We fought the whole fucking time and you know what, I should’ve seen the signs.”

‘How can I go on living without her?’ The thought popped up in your head for a moment.

She huffed, crossing her arms under her chest. “Tch. Not my fucking fault were falling apart. That’s all on you. You failed me, you good for nothing manchild.” She got up and went to your shared room.

She emerges from the room thirty minutes later with a bag and you instantly assumed she had packed some clothes. She sets the bag down on the floor and burns holes on the back of your head.

“If you would just listen to me, we wouldn’t be the way we are now.” Your head hangs low and you stare at your hands. “But you know what. Some people make mistakes and that’s alright. I know it’s going to be ok because you can think that you’re in love but in reality you're just in pain. That’s ok, you want to know why? It’s just better for me. And I think that’s the morale of the story.” You curl your hands into fists, your nails digging into the skin of your palms.

“Well maybe if you would’ve just taken care of me like you said then none of this would be happening right now. Good for nothing shit face! I’m fucking leaving. Don’t ever get in touch with me ever again.” She steps out and slams the door shut behind her.

As soon as she left, you felt your lips quiver. Was it really your fault? Maybe, you did promise her a good life. A life that she deserved.

— — — — - .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. - — — — —

𝙰𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚜𝚒𝚡 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚑𝚜 𝚊𝚐𝚘. . .

You took a deep breath as you waited for her to enter the room. Tooru, your best friend, stood next to you.

“Relax Iwa-chan~! Relax~” He patted your back to help you with your nerves.

“But what if she says no..” You sighed in defeat.

“Iwa I don’t think she’ll say no. Do you see how she looks at you?” Tooru shook his head.

“But-“ You were cut off by the sound of the door opening.

There she was, standing wide eyed at the doorstep. She greets everyone as she walks closer to you. Her arms slinging over your shoulders as she engulfed you in a warm embrace. You felt so at home and so complete.

“Welcome home, Princess.” You whispered in her ear.

She gave you a small smile, not saying a word. Your heart raced a million miles an hour with just her looking at you. Just then she flashed a smile of irritation but you brushed it off since you didn’t know what it was for. You finally looked her straight in the eyes as you racked your brain for the right words.

“I know you just got here but there’s something important I want to ask you.” Your voice was a little shaky but you were still able to mask how nervous you were with a strong front.

“What is it, love?” Her head tilts over to the side, eyebrow cocked up.

“Will you marry me?” The question came out almost a whisper.

All you could hear was the loud thumping of your heart. Time seemed to have slowed down. You watched her reaction to the question. Her eye twitches but you didn’t know why, it only twitches like that when she’s not in the best of moods. Her mouth is slightly open, eyes blinking slowly. Then you decide to speak up.

“Listen, I know it’s.. sudden.. but. I love you so much. I promise to take care of you. I promise to give you the world. I’ll always be here for you. I don’t mind if you can’t give me an answer now. All I know is that I want you and I want to spend my whole life with you.” You took her hands and kissed her knuckles with gentleness.

The room was quiet and it was deafening. Everyone was watching you and waiting for her answer. You swallowed dryly. Then you see the corner of her lips jerk.

She went to hug you again and whispered in your ear. “You’ll keep those promises right?” You nodded. “Then yes. I’ll marry you.” She answered.

You had felt so ecstatic and alive at the moment while all she felt was disdain but you didn’t see it. No, it’s not that you didn’t see it but you chose not to even though it was written all over her face.

— — — — - .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. - — — — —

You got up from your seat and fished your phone out of your pocket. Deciding to call your mother to tell her the news. After a few rings, her voice boomed out of the little speaker.

“Hajime? What’s wrong?” It’s as if she already knew but how could she not.

She saw how much you were suffering in this relationship but you blinded yourself with love. You spoke finally, not realizing the tears suddenly pouring down your face. You sobbed into the speaker of the phone and all you could hear was your mother trying to comfort you.

“Just where did you find this woman, Hajime?” She spoke up. “You never realized just how toxic she is. We noticed how the light in you slowly got diminished the longer you two we’re together. Don’t think I don’t know about how she talks to you. I’ve heard it and she treats you like garbage which you aren’t.” Her voice was soft but her words were sharp. “She calls you useless when she doesn’t even work. You have given her everything and you have been providing for her for the past six years. All she’s ever done for you was bring you down. Hajime, my son, Please. Let her go.”

‘How could I ever stop loving her?’ Your heart twisted in your chest.

You laughed without amusement. “I’m sorry, mom. I just fell in love with the wrong person. You know young people fall in love with the wrong people sometimes. And I guess I was the fool who fell.” You hiccuped, wiping the tears off of your face. “I just made a mistake that’s all. And I think that’s alright, yeah. It’s ok. I just thought that this feeling was still love but I guess it’s just pain. In the end it’s better for me cause I learned and that’s just the moral of the story.”

She nodded although you couldn’t see. She reassured and comforted you one last time before she hung up. Your arm slid down, loosely holding onto your phone. You just sat there, head resting on the couch as you stared at the ceiling. There was nothing there anymore. All you were was an empty shell of a man. You were too numb to feel anything, so you just sat there for hours.

You got knocked back into reality by the loud banging on your door. You turned your head ever so slightly, just staring at your door before it burst open. Then there stood your best friend. He was angry for some reason then it clicked in your head. ‘Ah, She must’ve gone to him.’ You sighed as he stomped towards you. He took a good look at your face and his heart dropped. All that anger dissipated into worry.

“Iwa.. chan?” He knelt in front you as he studied your expression.

“Oh. It’s just you. Tooru, hey.” You said so monotonously, void of any feeling whatsoever.

“Hey. Are you ok? You look like shit.” He stood up, resting a hand on his hip. “She came to me you know.”

“Uh huh.” You stared at your hands, looking at the little lines that ran across your palm.

“Iwaizumi Hajime.” He tried to get your full attention. “Get yourself together man. Don’t let her tell you this shit.” He grabbed your shoulders and shook you.

You slowly lifted your head to look up at him. Tears were once again, flowing hot and heavy down your face. A sob escapes from your mouth as soon as you fully realize who was standing in front of you, everything finally coming back to focus.

“Oikawa? Wh-What are you doing here?” Your voice was weak, mimicking how you felt at the moment.

“She came to me again. Is it really over?” His voice was lined with concern.

“Did she really say that? If she did then I guess it is.” Your heart felt like it was getting stabbed by a million daggers.

“Are you.. are you going to be ok?” He tries to read your emotions but all he could see from your face was years worth of pain and suffering. “H-hey you’ll be fine! You’ll get through this!” He tries to reassure you.

‘How can I just forget her?’ Your eyebrow twitched.

An exasperated sigh left your mouth as you shake your head, chuckling without any sort of humor. “You know they say that it’s so much better to have loved someone and lost said love rather than not having to have loved at all.” An image of her flashes through your head.

Tooru clicks his tongue, crossing his arms and looking at the picture of you and her hanging on the wall. “You do realize that, that could just be a load of shit, right? So this I What I’m going to tell you. He bends down and puts his hands on your shoulder. “As humans, sometimes we make mistakes and that’s alright, really. It’s ok.”

“Yeah, I know. I thought I was in love but I guess it was just because I was engaged. I hung on to a dying relationship. I made promises I couldn’t make. And that’s my mistake.” You close your eyes for a second, wiping the tears away.

“Ok but you know! That’s alright! And it really is ok. In the end, wasn’t it for the better? Now it’s just the moral of the story.” He gives you the biggest possible smile ever.

‘How am I going to go on normally now?’ You worried.

You tried to smile back but you failed. The tears you dried came rushing back, turning you into a big sobbing mess. Your best friend now sat beside you, rubbing comforting circles around your back.

“Hajime.” He sighs rather heavily. “Let me ask you a question.” He patted your back, leaning back onto the couch and looking up at the ceiling. “Was there ever a time that you were able to live without her?”

The question made you freeze. You never whipped your head so fast to look at him. “What?” It was all you could manage to say, not understanding the question he had asked.

“You heard me.” His expression was unreadable until he looked back at you. “I’m asking because I can hear your thoughts clearly. You don’t have to wonder how you could ever live without her because you already have. From the moment you we’re born to the moment before you met her, you have a life outside of her. I know it’ll take awhile for you to move on but you have to start now.” He looks at you earnestly. “Now come on. Why don’t we start by cleaning out everything that reminds you of her, huh?”

He pats your back again, standing up then turning to help you up. His words play on repeat inside your head as you start to refresh your life and find your peace. And maybe, hopefully one day, to find someone who you’ll be able to call your other half.

——————————————————————————

[blkjackals]

Pairing: Semi Eita x GN!Reader

Song: Our Lives Would Make A Sad, Boring Movie by the Hotelier

Taglist: @the-black-birb @hqwriter @miyulovestowrite @madireyn​

WC: 859

Semi Eita had your heart rather fast, if you say so yourself. From the instant you saw him across the room at a college party, something just clicked in both of your minds, and from then on you both got into so much fun.

From staying up too late, to 2am runs to the corner store, the two of you enjoyed being young and stupid. Though, Semi was the more level-headed one out of the two of you. Everything the two of you did was basically a large ‘Screw You’ to the people in power who wanted specific things from the two of you.

You were set up to be an accountant, which was something you never wanted to do. Semi was going to be a businessman, and while you thought he’d look hot in a suit, you knew it wasn’t a real fit for him.

So, why not rebel?

You had always wanted to be a [insert dream job here], and Semi wanted to make it big time with his band, as the bassist. The two of you conspired to drop out of school. You were going to start working part time to save money to pay for your own schooling, and Semi was going to start working part-time at the corner store so he could focus on his band.

In order to save money though, despite being in a budding relationship, the two of you had to move in together, after just one month of dating. It was scary. It was like taking a massive chance, since it would either work out amazingly and be something that could change your relationship for the better, or it would rip your relationship to shreds and leave the two of you as broke drop-outs who can’t stand each other.

It was such a huge chance. To say fuck it and try, or to play it safe, but after a week of thinking, the two of you decide to try it. You hate your lessons with a passion and would rather be miserable working part time than work here.

☼☼☼

It’s been a year since the two of you moved in together and started chasing your dream jobs. Semi’s band blew up almost instantly after you guys dropped out, and you stood on the sidelines, cheering him on as you continued working to pay for your own schooling.

Though, Semi was saving up. The two of you split a lot of expenses, but his band was bringing so much money in, and he wanted to spend it on you. Spoil you a bit. Especially since you guys had fallen out of your rebellious phase. Tonight, however, you were at one of his concerts, standing in the front row as Semi sings the song he wrote about the two of you a year ago.

“If there's one thing in your life that you'll never forget - It's that we're dead in our future but we're not dead yet - Your life starts right now so start acting like it - Or else you'll wake up one day feeling like a silhouette” he sings, eyes locking on you as the last note fades out. You cheer loudly, grinning up at your boyfriend. 

“I have one thing to say before this night is over. y/n. I adore you wholeheartedly. We’ve taken so many risks together, but they’ve all paid off. I hope this one does too.” He says, setting his Bass down to walk towards where you were. He grabs a small box out of his pocket.

“I want to be with you. I want to make it obviously clear that I'm yours and you’re mine. I want something that connects us when I have to go far. We were young and dumb when we rushed into living together a month after we started dating. But we clicked, and I knew back then that you’re the only person in the world for me. I’m going to be young and stupid right now, just like we were when we made that choice, and ask you if you’d like to spend the rest of your days with me. Y/N, will you marry me?” His hands are shaking as he gets down on one knee. You were crying during his speech, and you know you’ll say yes. The security helps you onstage, and you rush towards Semi.

“Of course, you dumbass!” You reply, letting him slip the ring onto your finger before you hug him as tight as you can. 

Taking risks, doing things your parents disagreed with, fighting against what others wanted. It's all you’d done for years. Everything you did felt right. 

Being a rebellious little shit back then set your life on its proper track. It ensured that you and Semi lived the life you truly wanted with each other. It taught you that you don’t have to settle for what others want, and to chase the things you hold dear. Even now, you were chasing your fiance in a way, as he began touring the world while you started studying to get your dream job. 

Sometimes you need a little chaos to find perfection.

[novaflair]

go on then, love

Said the Sky ft. The Maine

pairing: suna x f!reader, songfic // cw: suggestive?, post-s*x // wc: 907

You lie underneath his hot body, the feeling of your high fleets as you catch your breath. Suna doesn’t tear his gaze from your fucked out face, his eyes that harbors remnants of lust and still full of adoration are the first thing you see as you open your own.

You still have your legs wrapped around his torso. It's okay, because it seems like he doesn't plan on removing himself from you just yet.

So you put your right hand on his left cheek instead.

"You're staring."

But his gaze still doesn't falter. And you can hear your own heart beating faster again in your chest.

You finally bring your aching legs down and look at him back with the same amount of love, if not more.

“Rin...”

And Suna feels his own heart beat faster too.

He closes his eyes as he touches his forehead with yours, careful not to crush you with his weight.

“You are more than enough for me,” he tells you,

“But I can’t get enough of you at the same time”

Fuck. It’s a good thing he has his eyes closed because you can feel your face heat up from the sudden sentiment.

“That’s so cheesy, Rin,” you defend. Though you weren’t able to hide the shakiness in your voice. How were you supposed to respond to that anyway? It was enough to make your eyes water.

Suna opens his eyes at your response. He chuckles softly as he pushes himself off you and lays by your side.

You lay on your side to face him too, admiring all his facial features you loved for so many years.

The color of his eyes, the shape of his nose, the line of his lips-- these features, they never change, but you admire them like it’s the first time you’ve seen them up-close.

Because you can’t get enough of him too.

And you fall for him every single day.

It’s nothing new, and something new at the same time.

Your bedroom curtains are closed, but the room is bright from the afternoon light.

“We need to get out of bed.”

“But we did?”

“Rin, getting up to eat brunch half naked does not count,” you giggle.

He snuggles his face on the side of your neck and hugs you tighter.

“This is more comfortable than getting up though.”

“But don’t you want to celebrate the rest of your birthday by doing something else? We’ve spent half of it just lazing here, doing nothing. You still haven’t even made your birthday wish yet, since you wouldn’t even let me go out and buy you a cake.”

He lifts his head up to look at you. “I wouldn’t call our activities ‘doing nothing’.”

And then he flashes you a teasing smirk, “And you sounded like you reeeaaaally enjoyed just staying here in bed.”

You playfully slap his chest and laugh. And you can see how wide his smile is too.

“Besides,” he starts as his expression softens, and he grabs your hand and kisses the inside of your palm.

It’s nothing new, and something new at the same time, because you’ll never get used to feeling every part of him, whether it’s when he makes love to you, or have his frame engulfed in your arms, or just the graze of his soft lips on your fingertips, it still elicits the same electric energy like the first time.

“I don’t need a birthday wish.”

You hum in response instead of asking why.

“I already have you, and you are more than enough.”

And this time you don’t hide how your eyes water, or rather you can’t.

You blink and just let the tears roll down to the side of your face, and you give him that smile that makes his head spin.

Usually, Suna thrives on this kind of reaction from you. But instead of teasing you, Suna just stares at you. 

How you look whenever he tells you how he feels, your eyes respond to it all, and it’s so pure, and sometimes it’s too much. 

“You get cheesier as you age,” you tease softly despite your blurry vision.

Suna knows you know how much he loves you, but still..

“I love you,” he says. “And I don’t want to stop letting you know.”

He lifts himself up and kisses you on the lips. It doesn’t have the same urgency as moments ago when you two were so eager to feel each other up, but it leaves you breathless all the same.

It’s late in the afternoon. You and Suna are still in bed, white sheets barely covering your naked, sweat-dried bodies. He’s kissing you slowly with his hands on the side of your face.

And Suna is now a year older. He’s changed through the years he’s been with you-- a good change, to a better man he likes to believe.

He’s older, and cheesier, as you claim, but one thing remains,

Suna Rintaro, is still utterly, maddeningly in love with you.

You don’t get the chance to tell him how much you love him back, but it’s okay. He knows, he can feel it on your lips, see it in your eyes, you never fail to let him know.

And when he finally disconnects his lip from yours, you tell him, “I wanna love you for the rest of my life.”

Suna’s eyes shine, and then he smiles.

“Go on then, love.”

"Go on then, love

And show me your heart

'Cause you are enough

As you are and I'm awestruck

So go on then, love"

a/n: happy late birthday, sunarin! <3 I choose you for my first ever post because my love for you is unmatched (but matched with Atsumu xD)

(01/29/2022)

[iwaizumeanie]

There was something cold about the way you were sprawled over the sheets underneath your thick comforter, an unwelcome contrast to the warmth your bed usually granted you. Matsukawa's arm was stretched and lying beneath your head, keeping your neck angled so that you could look at him, eyes closed and breathing steady.

"I don't get you, Issei," you spoke out loud accidentally, retreating into yourself when he turned his head to look at you. He cocked a brow, silently permitting you to continue. "You don't let yourself enjoy things."

Speaking freely like this felt like a weight being physically lifted off of your chest. "You come here almost every night, and we do whatever it is we're doing, but you don't..." You paused, searching for the right words. "I feel like I don't know anything about you, but you've gone and made a place for yourself inside of me. Does that make sense?"

He chuckled, lolling his head again to stare at the ceiling. "This your way of telling me you're falling in love?" His tone was unintentionally condescending, but he squeezed your shoulder tighter.

"It's like you're starving yourself of love."

He stiffened against you, casting his gaze everywhere around the room that didn't involve looking directly at you. He sighed after a moment, heavy and letting it hang in the air. "If I didn't starve, I'd devour."

"And?"

He rolled onto his side, throwing an arm around you to pull you closer into his chest. "People don't want to be devoured. Leads to ugly wounds."

"Wounds can be cleaned, Issei. They can heal. It doesn't have to be ugly."

He rubbed at his eyes with the heel of his palm, finally finding it in himself to look at you. You were blushing, brows pulled together in thought while you stared back at him. It was similar to the way it would be seeing a child pouting, begging for attention. He wanted to give you the world when you looked at him like that; the feeling clawed at his heart, desperately searching for a way out.

"You've never had to properly heal a wound, it sounds like. It's all pain, loving and losing; it's such a vicious cycle. Do you know what I mean? It stings and it burns for such a long time, that when it's finally healed, you don't want to risk that kind of pain again."

Your words hurdled out before your brain could catch up, taking you both by surprise. "You sound stupid."

He stared at you, working to discern your expression; maybe you were right, he thought, it did sound stupid when he played his words back in his mind. Cycles were meant to be broken, he could imagine himself devouring you whole in this moment. He pushed himself up on his elbows, leaning against your bedframe. You sat up with him, pulling the blanket up to your chest, feeling vulnerable enough as it were.

"Maybe," he spoke softly, resting his open palm in your lap. "You can clean my wounds for me this time. They'll heal properly, if you're the one cleaning them out."

You placed your hand in his own, tracing over the love line of his palm with the tips of your fingers. He was scared, but not in the way he was used to; he was scared of the healing to come. He was scared of the way the past was rearing its teeth at him, ready to bite and send him spiraling down again, his open heart bleeding from his chest.

"If you'll have me," finally, you laced your fingers through his own, watching the way he squeezed your hand until his knuckles turned white. "I'll follow you wherever you go."

"Yeah," he threw his free arm over his eyes, hiding the way they welled up before you. "You say that like you know what you're getting yourself into."

"Look at me, Issei," you pulled at his arm until it dropped limp by his side, softening as you faced the sadness in his gaze. "I mean it, you could eat me alive. I won't mind, as long as it's really you. I want to make a home inside of you, the way you have in me. You aren't the only one who's afraid, but you need to be willing to try again."

He felt so stupid, watching you lay yourself bare in front of him as he scrambled to reconstruct the walls he worked so hard on, the ones your fervent hands continued to break apart before his eyes. Nobody had ever fought for his feelings this way, always backing off as soon as he made his distance known; you were different, in every way he'd learned to grow accustomed to.

"I'll try." He said it through gritted teeth, staring you down with an unwavering intensity. "If it's you, I'll try my damndest."

I'll learn to love you if it kills me.

[etherealtobio]

“i’ve had enough.”

your voice rings in kageyama’s ears, it’s one sentence he never wants to hear from you.

it’s been half a day since you two have been arguing, and since then, his pride never falters to just say what he wants.

but he wants to fix everything.

you aren’t on the same page as him, though. you were sick and tired of all these petty arguments, and this — and probably the last one — was the last straw.

and now’s the only time the two of you are sitting almost close to each other on the couch after avoiding him the whole day.

“are you leaving me?” kageyama asks, eyes glassy and hands quivering, but he still manages to keep his composure.

if you were to look at him, his heart might just shatter right then and there.

“it’s so heavy,” you feel your tears forming on the edges of your eyes, “i don’t want to feel this way anymore.”

kageyama wants to do something, he needs to do something to make you change your mind.

but he figures it’s all too late.

“we can still fix this,” he swallows his pride, his mind blank and throat dry, and it’s the only thing he can say, even if he knows it might not change anything.

you look at him, tears streaming down your face and you force a smile, “you only thought of that now because i’m close to giving up.”

“i’m sorry,” he feels his words aren’t enough, but he's trying. “please don’t go.”

he’s never used to being this vulnerable in front of anyone, in front of you, but there’s nothing better left for him to do.

kageyama reaches out to you, arms wrapping around you, and your tears start to fall faster.

he lets you cry on his chest — it’s a sight he’d prefer seeing than you walking out the door — and he rubs his palm on your back, whispering i’m sorry’s and i love you’s.

you wipe your tears before facing him. “i don’t know what to say.”

“you don’t have to say anything,” kageyama brushes the hair on your face before planting a kiss on your forehead. “we’ll make this work.”

he wraps his arms around you again, and he’s holding onto you like fish on a hook, never wanting to let go, “i don’t want to be in love with another, even in another life.”

©️ ETHEREALTOBIO - do not copy, translate, or repost

[laceymorganwrites]

Someone´s disaster

Word count: 1,624

Pairing: Atsumu x fem!reader

Warnings: swearing, unhealthy relationships and insecurities

Song: Someone´s disaster - Beach Weather

Summary: Atsumu is selfdestructive and you have way too many walls. It doesn´t mean anything, does it?

A/N: This was so much fun to write, please always talk with your partner about your inner conflicts, the relationship depicted in this isn´t healthy, I´m not romanticising anything, this is just from their pov.

General taglist: @newfriendjen

I've been searching for a drug like you Breathing in that Pollyanna youth Chasing down those melancholy hues Cause I've been searching for a drug like you

You were the kind of girl that was at every party she could go to. Provided that famous people would be there too. You didn´t really care how famous they were, it was enough for them to be in the spotlight.

It wasn´t so much that you craved their fame. You craved attention, craved people looking at you as if they loved you, even if it was just for one night.

Maybe it was fucked up, but you liked broken people. Seeking them out was like a game to you at this point and ironically you found the most to be famous and forced to attend parties they didn´t want to be at.

Broken people always seemed to attract each other like magnets, destroying each other even more and perhaps you craved that destruction too.

After all you didn´t believe in the good in people, having been betrayed and disappointed too much already in your life.

Instead people became shallow to you, you didn´t want to make any friends, not wanting to see them leave you like everyone else. Anything involving any sort of attachment and commitment scared you, love and any kind of romance especially.

It was easier to focus on your physical needs anyway, emotions were overrated and only ended up being a nuisance. Oh it kills me and there's no denying that I can't shake Cause I just wanna be someone's disaster And I can't break but I know you're trying And it kills me cause I just wanna be someone's disaster

Atsumu didn´t want to be at this party, he hated how fucking fake everyone was. Nobody cared about him and everyone was always so adamant to talk about themselves. Maybe that was a selfish thought of him, but then again, he didn´t want people to care about specifically him.

He wanted them to care overall. The thing that annoyed him most about those parties was that none of its guests needed to be there. And yet all of them crowded the place, thinking they owned it.

He came to hate those events, even his birthday. Hell, especially his birthday. Getting all those fake messages wishing him good luck and health and whatever. Those people were just messaging him to be able to tell their friends about it.

It made him sick to the stomach.

All Atsumu wanted to do on his birthday was hide in a hole and never come out again. He wished he could at least spend it with his brother, but their relationship hasn´t been the best lately.

Especially in the current season. He wasn´t at his best performance wise and everyone knew it.

They knew and still complimented him on it, as if he didn´t screw up his serves all the time, as if they weren´t inaccurate and sloppy.

Nothing infuriated him more than pretentious people, the people who called themselves his fans.

The thing that irked him the most was that they weren´t being honest, trying everything to be in the spotlight for a second and denying ever doing so. You've been looking for a wreck like me A perfect catastrophic harmony Falling in and out of symmetry Cause you've been looking for a wreck like me

Maybe it was because of that, that Atsumu noticed you straight away.

You weren´t really that outstanding in the crowd, you did what everyone else did too, mingle in the crowd and appease people who thought they were the most important in the room.

But unlike everyone else, you were being honest about it.

When Atsumu looked into your bored, lightless eyes, he felt a rush of adrenaline go through him.

He couldn´t remember when he last felt this excited.

Over the years he got really good at identifying red flags such as yourself, but he also realized that he was way into them.

Why deny that he craved the heartbreak? What good would it do him? Fuck, if it meant being wrecked by you, he´d go through hell if that was what it took.

Atsumu was bored of nice people, they were all so bland and he learned not to trust them because everyone always wanted something. And you always had to be careful with people who you couldn´t tell what they wanted.

After everything, Atsumu needed to feel something and sadly agony was the only thing that worked.

He couldn´t believe in the cheers of his fans anymore, not in the congratulations from his friends and teammates, well, he didn´t have friends these days.

But hearing that someone didn´t love him anymore? That he´d never be good enough? Now, that was something which was way too easy to believe.

In a weird way it made him feel at ease.

And you didn´t. At all.

You made him feel a kind of excited that he hadn´t felt in so long, he wanted you to break him in a different way, to break him only to put him back together and then smash his heart to pieces.

So when you suggested to get away from the party, he agreed without any second thoughts.

That night he had the best sex he ever had in his life and realized that it wasn´t nearly enough for him.

Oh it kills me and there's no denying that I can't shake Cause I just wanna be someone's disaster And I can't break but I know you're trying And it kills me cause I just wanna be someone's disaster

Before he met you, Atsumu only attended the parties his teammates invited him to, the ones that were mandatory. But now, he was at every single one just to meet you again.

He was desperate, greedy and in need for you.

When he finally found you, you just laughed at him, pointing out his miserable state.

You took pity on him and your arrangement was born.

The relationship with Atsumu was weird to say the least, he was more dependent on you, that much was clear.

In a strange way you found that cute, you liked being needed and Atsumu was always so honest with everything he did and said even though he didn´t notice it himself.

He was wide eyed and had a good soul, he was too kind to be fucked over by the world like this.

And you hated yourself for caring that much.

You never did before, but somehow he made it way too easy. It irritated you.

The two of you were just fucking every time you met, so why did you look forward to every stupid party now? And why didn´t you fuck anyone else like you usually did? Why weren´t you letting yourself get bored of Atsumu like usual? What was it about him?

Maybe you really pitied him.

Well, whatever it was, you didn´t want it to stop and you sure as hell didn´t want to think about it.

Because thinking about it would make it true, the truth only sent you running usually.

This time you wanted to stay and let him break you apart.

Somehow you looked forward to the pain, to the heartbreak. Because it would once again prove that it was always the same, that your intuition wasn´t wrong and that you should go back to your usual self and ways.

Atsumu didn´t make it easy for you.

I've been searching for a drug like you You've been looking for a wreck like me I've been searching for a drug like you Oh for a drug like you

With more time passing, it became almost impossible to be apart from Atsumu. Both of you never imagined that it would go like this, that whatever you had would last.

But it didn´t make any of you happy. It wasn´t enough. You were far too gone for that, you both were head over heels, but too stubborn to admit it, too scared of getting hurt and yet expecting it at the same time.

As if it was inevitable.

Today wasn´t the first time you stayed over after Atsumu insisted. You didn´t complain, even though staying over was the dealbreaker. Even though both of you promised not to catch feelings and stop seeing each other as soon as you did.

It was as if you forgot that other people existed too, though nobody else would suffice, you needed each other.

Every time you stayed over at his place, Atsumu made you breakfast and kissed you softly as if it was normal, like a dance practiced a hundred times.

And you didn´t complain.

Instead you felt safe and oddly comfortable. It was too good for your taste, you didn´t trust it.

Both of you didn´t, but neither of you said anything about it.

If you mentioned it, it would be over and that was the last thing you wanted.

So you just bathed in his company, enjoyed the way he held your hand, got excited when you watched his games.

He took you with him to his training because he hated being alone, but usually he just needed someone around, he didn´t care who it was.

But now it had to be you, nobody else would be what he wanted, who he needed.

Only you.

Bokuto had asked him one day if you were his girlfriend and without thinking about it, he had replied ´not yet´.

Girlfriend. That sounded nice. It kills me and there's no denying that I can't shake Cause I just wanna be someone's disaster And I can't break but I know you're trying And it kills me cause I just wanna be someone's disaster