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#i also miss when i had friends on here but most of them deactivated & now i feel like i'm just talking to the void when i post on here
cheekblush · 2 years
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this girl from class asked me if i go out often with my friends girl i don't even have friends 😭
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lilacmingi · 19 days
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TOWARDS THE LIGHT
My works are 14+ ONLY. If you’re under 14 DO NOT interact with me or any of my works. And please don’t spam-like!
Pairing: Sith!Seonghwa x Jedi!fem reader
Word count: 16,450
Note: So I didn’t think I’d ever write anything longer than Hongjoong’s D&D AU “A Quest For Love” but here we are lol so strap in because this is a big one
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The sizzling sound of clashing lightsabers filled the air in the training room, blue and green beams of light swinging around and colliding with one another with a resounding spark.
Seonghwa's saber was swung towards you, which you blocked, pushing back with your own weapon and successfully deflecting his attack. He let out a huff, a small smirk playing at the corner of his mouth at the challenge. He always liked battling with you, though you bested him most of the time, he took it as a chance to improve.
The blue beam of light Seonghwa wielded was spun around in a showy manner as he lunged forward, raising the saber. Your eyes stayed trained on him as he approached with an aggressive attack, holding out your green lightsaber in preparation before swinging it at his and successfully knocking it from his hand.
Seonghwa grunted in mild agitation as he landed on the ground, having lost his footing when he landed. His arm shot out and brought the weapon back to his hand by using the Force. He was always good at that.
Getting to his feet, he wasted no time coming at you again, this time with a determined gleam in his eye. His burst of energy took you by surprise and you found yourself scrambling to do something before his blazing beam of light came swinging at you. With only a few seconds to react, your lightsaber came up to halt his attack, the beams making a sizzling sound when touching.
The weapons were pulled away from one another before clashing once more, and again, and again. Each time, neither of you were able to strike the other.
This was a familiar scene. Being in this gray training room with walls made of metal. You and Seonghwa had spent almost your whole lives training to be Jedi. You were Luke's only apprentices. You were the best of friends—inseparable some might say.
After continuing to block attacks, you saw a moment of opportunity and leapt into the air, attempting to use the Force to assist you in going high enough to jump right over Seonghwa. You just barely missed his head as you moved through the air, landing on the ground with a soft huff. Now standing just behind Seonghwa, you held the tip of your lightsaber to the back of his head, making him freeze.
"I win."
"Not bad." He commented with a chuckle, raising his hands in surrender before turning to face you. "That Force jump was a little rusty though."
"I thought I'd try something new." You shrugged, deactivating your weapon.
"You could still use some practice." He remarked, doing the same with his saber.
"I'm impressed." A voice full of wisdom spoke from one end of the training room.
You and Seonghwa turned your heads towards the utterance, finding Luke standing in the doorway with a fond expression on his face. He had been watching.
"Y/n, that's the first time I've seen you successfully execute a Force jump. You need a little more practice, but I think you'll have it down in no time."
"Thank you, Master Luke." You bowed at his praises, always honored to receive them from such a well-known Jedi.
"Seonghwa, you have this fire in your eyes when engaged in a fight. You've got determination, but your attacks were a little aggressive. When in battle it's good to be strong and vigorous, but you also need to be fluid and focused. Sometimes hostility isn't the best course of action."
Seonghwa nodded, taking in the information he was being given. He wanted to be a good Jedi, as good as Master Luke, and he would do anything to work towards that goal.
"I'll try and tone it down." He nodded, showing that he understood the critiques he was given.
"Good." Luke smoothed out his gray robes, giving the both of you a once over before speaking again. "You two had better go eat. I'm sure you're exhausted from training. You kids have been in here for hours."
With that, he exited the training room.
Glancing over at your battle partner, you could see his round coffee-colored eyes shine with interest at the mention of food—Seonghwa was always a big eater.
"Let's go." You linked arms with him, tugging him out of the room and into the corridor of the ship you often trained in.
Hurrying down the loading ramp of the spacecraft that was parked amongst the lush greenery, you and Seonghwa hastened across the base past other Resistance members, heading directly for the canteen which was really just a large tent set up for people to eat in.
Seonghwa pushed past the beige canvas flaps and entered the area where a handful of people were eating. His eyes locked on the bar situated at the back of the tent where a droid was busying itself by stacking clean bowls. Plopping down on two of the six vacant barstools, you and Seonghwa rested your elbows on the countertop, the droid rolling over to take your orders. A wooden board with a small selection of dishes carved into it hung from a structural beam above the bar. Seonghwa's index finger hovered in the air as he read over the items as if he hadn't done so the last thousand times you two had been in there. While he decided what he wanted, you waved the droid over and ordered a vitajuice and a warm stew, hoping for something filling after a strenuous practice battle.
"Me too." Seonghwa piped up before the droid rolled away, settling on getting the same as you.
"Copycat."
He snorted-slash-scoffed in response to your playful name-calling. "It sounded good when you ordered it. Also, a vitajuice is what I need right now after all that practice." As if to emphasize his words, he stretched out his back and jerked his head a bit, cracking his neck in the process.
"Sure." You responded with an eye roll.
The low murmur of patrons in the mess tent and the distant sound of clanking dishes in the back floated through the air, filling the comfortable silence between you and Seonghwa as you waited for your meals.
The bar droid rolled out from the kitchen area with two glasses clutched in each of its pincers, placing them in front of you and Seonghwa. After thanking the droid, it got back to work behind the counter stacking dishes, picking up right where it left off.
Taking the straw between your index finger and thumb, you took a sip of the refreshing juice, sighing in satisfaction as the cool liquid coated your mouth.
"Ahh. That hits the spot." You hummed.
"Sure does." Seonghwa agreed, sipping so hard on the straw that his cheeks sucked in.
You cackled in response to the ridiculous sight next to you.
"Easy there, bud. It's not going anywhere." You managed to speak through laughter, giving him a reassuring pat on the shoulder.
He pulled away with a drawn-out exhale, the drink having obviously refreshed him.
"I could've chugged the whole thing if I really wanted to."
"I don't doubt it."
Seonghwa's large eyes grew in size when a droid from the kitchen rounded the corner with two bowls of piping hot stew a few minutes later, his hungry gaze following the dishes until they were set down before you. Spoons were given to each of you and you wasted no time getting a sizable spoonful of the stew, Seonghwa following suit. Hums made in unison reverberated in both your throats when you took your first bites, the meal warming you from the inside.
"Is it just me or does food taste better after you've been practicing?" You asked.
"It definitely tastes better." Seonghwa nodded in agreement.
After a filling and satisfactory meal, you took a stroll around camp while your food settled. People bustled about, carrying equipment and crates across the way, some taking them into a nearby cave which doubled as a makeshift hangar for one of the many spaceships.
There was a nice breeze jostling the baby hairs that framed your face and fluttering the leaves of nearby trees. The gray fabric of your pants brushed against the tall grass that covered every inch of the area and beyond. Ajan Kloss, the jungle moon where the Resistance base resided, was where you and Seonghwa had been living your whole lives. You were both moved here as kids, probably no older than ten, by your resistance member parents and when your shared force-sensitivity was discovered by Luke, he started training you. It's all either of you had ever known. There were only fleeting glimpses of your old home planet.
A year later, you found yourself sitting on the Millennium Falcon with Seonghwa, seated on the curved bench of the holographic game table in the lounge area watching him play a round of dejarik with Chewbacca. The ship, piloted by Luke and his closest companion, Han Solo, was headed straight to the planet of Ilum to find kyber crystals for yours and Seonghwa's very own lightsabers. It was tradition for younglings to build their lightsaber before moving up to padawan status, but Luke was different. He had his own ways of training that contrasted from how it used to be before the Great Jedi Purge took place and wiped out almost all the Jedi. Thus why you and Seonghwa were just now getting lightsabers. To say you were excited was an understatement.
Chewbacca raised his furry arms up in victory, having beat Seonghwa in yet another round of dejarik.
"Man." Sighed your friend as he leaned back against the bench with a small smirk tugging up at the corner of his mouth.
"Don't feel bad." You gave him a supportive pat on the shoulder. "Chewie has been playing this game for years. He's a dejarik pro. It's nearly impossible to beat him."
"One day." Seonghwa pointed at the undefeated Wookie who waved off his promise dismissively.
"Hey, kids." Han's approaching voice, followed by the man himself, grabbed your attention. "We're on autopilot right now, but we should be to Ilum soon." He then turned to Chewie. "I hope you're going easy on him." He nodded towards Seonghwa.
The Wookie shook his head before throwing his head back to laugh heartily. Han gave a small chuckle and a head shake of his own before leaning to rest against the nearest wall.
"So, lightsabers." He began.
"Yeah." You nodded with a grin. "I'm really excited. This is a special day."
"Very special." Seonghwa agreed. "It's the most significant day for us as padawans."
"Oh, yes." Han nodded. "I know all about it." He paused to look at the both of you. "Y'know, Luke is really proud of you both. I'm sure he's told you that in some way or another, but I figured I'd say something anyway."
You and Seonghwa shared a gentle look with one another, touched by Han's words.
"Alright, well," He cleared his throat and pushed off the wall he was leaned against, heading out of the room. "gotta get back to the cockpit. Chewie, try to let Seonghwa win a round, will ya?"
A year after you and Seonghwa crafted your lightsabers, Master Luke passed away. It was sudden and almost decisive, like Luke knew it was his time to go and so he went to be one with the Force. Things changed after that.
Your training came to a temporary halt and you were left without a Jedi Master. For a week you didn't leave your sleeping quarters. Meals were brought to you via Leia. Chewie even stopped by once. He was good company and his hugs were always healing in a way. You heard Seonghwa was about the same, staying cooped up in his room just like you.
After that first week, you tried to return to normal and Seonghwa started spending time in the training room swinging his lightsaber and screaming until his lungs burned. You only knew that because you saw him once when passing by. That was the only time you saw him, as he stayed locked in his room majority of the time, isolating himself.
A week and four days after Luke's passing, Seonghwa disappeared. You two were both so wrapped up in mourning that you kept to yourselves. Once your mind had cleared enough, you wanted to check on your friend and see how he was holding up. When the door to his sleeping quarters slid open, you were alarmed to find it completely bare. His bed was made and every piece of furniture was cleared off.
The color drained from your face and every part of your body went cold, your heart plummeting to your feet.
"No." You murmured, spinning around and rushing down the corridors of the ship, stopping at the training room only to find it empty.
Stumbling through the halls, you called out Seonghwa's name, the desperation and panic becoming more apparent in your tone.
"Y/n. What's wrong?"
Whirling around on your heel, you spotted Leia standing at the entrance hall of the spaceship.
"Seonghwa's gone." The words left your lips shakily, fading out weakly at the end. "His room is bare. Cleaned out."
Leia hurried over to take you in her arms just as your knees buckled. With Luke's passing still fresh, Seonghwa disappearing suddenly was like rubbing salt in a wound that hadn't even begun to heal.
"It's alright." Leia cooed, placing a gentle hand on the back of your head. "He could've needed some time alone... away from here."
"Why would he just leave without saying anything?"
"It's possible he's dealing with lots of emotions right now. Maybe he was overwhelmed."
The next words you uttered were muffled due to your face being buried in Leia's shoulder. "Do you think he'll come back?"
"He will. Just give him time."
You sat inside your sleeping quarters of a ship parked at the Resistance base, staring fondly at the lightsaber in your hands. Your fingertips glided reverently over the silvery metal of the hilt, admiring the intricate designs that were etched into them—a personal touch. Though you'd possessed the saber for three years, you still admired it.
"Y/n?"
At the sound of your name being called, you lifted your gaze to find General Leia standing in the doorway of your room.
"Come in."
She entered, a solemn expression etched on her aged yet elegant face as she moved to take a seat beside you on the bed.
"You look concerned." Shifting to face Leia, your brows pulled together. "What's wrong?"
"They're after us again."
"They? The First Order?"
She nodded. "They already destroyed our last base and now they're trying to find this one."
"What do we do? Do we move?"
Leia shook her head. "No. We're not giving up. Besides, they haven't found us yet."
"Then, why'd you come to me?"
She pressed her lips together and stood up, smoothing out her attire. "Let's walk."
You stood up immediately and followed her down the corridor of the ship and off the loading ramp.
Although you tried to be patient, you were itching to know why Leia had come to you with this urgent information. However, instead of forcing her to speak, you waited for her to do it on her own accord.
Your gaze moved to the ships parked about the area as you approached, your fingers fiddling anxiously with the hem of your gray tunic. Whatever it was she needed to say, it wasn't good.
"We need you, Y/n." She finally spoke. "You were trained by my brother and then by me for the last three years."
You blinked incredulously, wondering where she was going with this.
"We don't know what the First Order knows about our location or if they even know it at all. So I need you to sneak onto their ship and plant a listening device."
"You need me to do... what?"
"If we could listen in on what they're talking about, we could collect intel, find out what they know, and use it to our advantage."
"Leia I..." You trailed off, reeling from this being dropped on you so suddenly. "I'm sorry. I have to decline. I-I'm not ready."
"You are. You've been ready."
"There has to be someone else."
She came to a stop, turning to face you fully, her expression serious. "There isn't. You're our only hope."
You shook your head. "What if—"
"No." She stopped you. "No what if's. Y/n, if I didn't think you were capable, I wouldn't be sending you on this mission."
You hardly even ventured off Ajan Kloss. How were you expected to carry out this mission?
"I just..." Your mind was a swirling supercell storm of emotions.
There were so many things to consider, like your lack of expertise in other areas besides battle and having no experience in real missions.
"I can't fly a spaceship, let alone sneak into enemy territory with one. How would I even manage to get by their sensors? They'd pick me up in their airspace right away."
"I can do it." Poe piped up as he happened to be passing by. "I've got a First Order ship in the cave over there." He jerked a thumb somewhere behind him towards a cluster of rocks.
"How did you even get one of those?"
He shrugged in response. "Connections."
Just then, Finn passed by, giving you both a friendly smile and a small wave, oblivious to your conversation. You nodded knowingly in immediate understanding.
"Ah. I see."
"So, will you do it?" Leia asked you, bringing the focus back to the issue at hand.
Taking in a deep breath, you let the possible outcomes flicker in your mind like a slideshow. This could all go terribly wrong—or perhaps it could go incredibly well. Leia believed in you and being the only Jedi on the base, you felt obligated to help, not that you could ever say no anyway.
"Yes."
Walking down the familiar corridors of the ship you called home, you tried to process the fact that you'd be going on your first mission very soon. It was a heavy weight to bear and an even bigger responsibility. Lost in thought, you passed by a room that carried bitter emotions, your footsteps coming to a stop beside it without really thinking. Pressing a button, the door slid open and your eyes landed on the space that was untouched for three years.
Seonghwa's room.
Passing the threshold, you stepped inside and glanced around, your fingers caressing the comforter.
"I sure wish you were here right now." You sighed, speaking aloud to the memories of Seonghwa that remained stagnant in the space. "Could really use your help on this one."
A lump formed in your throat and you swallowed it down, blinking back tears that started to prick your eyes. At first you were sad and confused about Seonghwa leaving all of a sudden—you still were. Then you got angry, feeling like he walked out on you. Now you were just numb.
"This should've been our mission, not mine."
Dropping down to sit on the edge of his bed, you let out another heavy sigh. Your fingers traced absentmindedly over the sleek nightstand, trailing across the handle of a drawer. Without thinking, you tugged on it, something jostling inside as you did so.
With furrowed brows, you peered into the drawer, your eyes slowly widening when you spotted Seonghwa's lightsaber lying inside. With a shaky hand, you reached in and took hold of the hilt, retrieving it from where it sat for three long years.
He left his lightsaber.
This only raised more questions. Did he just give up? Decide he didn't want to be a Jedi anymore since Luke passed?
An image of Seonghwa living on some run-down planet, isolated and alone, flashed in your mind and you hated it.
Shaking away those thoughts, you stood up, your friend's lightsaber in hand, and left. Seonghwa's abandoned weapon was placed on a shelf in your room for safe keeping in case he returned one day.
The following evening, you gathered in the meeting hall with other Resistance members where a plan was made for how you'd infiltrate the First Order's ship and where to plant listening devices. A layout of the enemy ship was projected into the air showing all the different areas.
"A meeting room would be ideal. As would the main control room of the ship. That is where talks between the generals and captains take place." C-3PO spoke in his posh robotic voice while R2-D2 beeped in response. "You could collect lots of intel there."
You nodded, taking it all in, determined to do your absolute best on this mission.
Staring down the entry point on the First Order ship, you clenched your hands at your sides, anxiety plaguing every inch of your body.
"You got this." Poe's voice came from the cockpit of the ship. "I'll be waiting here for you when you're done. You can communicate through your earpiece and I'll be keeping an eye on you through the tracking device inside of it."
"What if I mess up?"
"You won't. I'll tell you where to go."
"What if I get captured?"
"Then we're coming for you."
With that reassurance, you gave a nod and hopped off the spacecraft and into the hangar, sticking close to the wall. You came equipped with three listening devices to plant and your lightsaber which was strapped to your waist in its holster. Your vigilant eyes stayed trained on the stormtroopers marching about the hangar as you slinked along, sneaking behind large First Order spacecrafts parked about the area and using them for coverage until you got to the doors that led to the inside of the ship.
Letting out a shaky exhale, you waited for an opportunity to slip inside when no one was looking. Your hands trembled as you felt the slightest bit of relief that one hurdle had been conquered. Now it was time for the real mission—planting listening devices and not getting caught.
"Poe? I'm in." You whispered.
"Good. You're doing well." He responded through your earpiece. "Go straight and then take a left."
Taking in a deep breath, you proceeded down the empty and darkened corridor of the ship, peering around the corner before taking a turn. There was no time to waste, so you kept moving while waiting for more instructions.
"There you go. Keep going. The meeting room is on your right. Put a listening device under the table in there if the coast is clear."
"Is this it?" You asked once you arrived at a large set of dark gray doors.
"Yes."
Pressing your ear against the cool metal, you listened for voices on the other side, receiving silence in response. Your trembling finger pressed the button to open the doors, a breath of relief leaving your dry lips when you were greeted with the sight of an empty room. Digging out a listening device, you stuck it under the edge of the table, poking your head out to check the halls before swiftly moving out.
"I got it."
"Alright. Proceed down the hall."
Your feet moved quickly, your boots making little noise in the process.
With Poe's direction, you were able to successfully place the second device without issue.
As you fled the area, the sound of stormtroopers talking made you freeze up. Being on a First Order ship, the structure of it was unique with protruding pillars that made for the perfect hiding spot. That, paired with the dim lighting was ideal for your situation, making it easy for you to slip through the shadowy areas. As the voices got closer, you darted to hide yourself behind one of the blocky pillars that jutted out from the wall, pressing yourself against the chilly metal and hoping you wouldn't get caught. The beating of your racing heart thudding in your ears almost completely masked the footfalls of the stormtroopers, your hand hovering over your lightsaber as you watched the two pass by. Your eyes stayed locked on them, following the white-armored figures who didn't notice your presence.
The hand that lingered over your weapon dropped back to your side once the threat was gone and you were on your way.
One more listening device to place.
The intense anxiety you felt before the mission began was not nearly as bad as it was. Having been roaming the corridors of the spaceship for the last ten minutes or so, you managed to get used to the task you were carrying out. That being said, there was still the anxiety of everything going wrong, however, you tried to keep your hopes up.
"Y/n? You still there?"
"Yeah." You let out an exhale. "Stormtroopers passed by. I was hiding."
"Good call. Your last destination is the control room. That'll be difficult because it'll be full of ship staff I'm sure."
Poe could hear your sigh through the earpiece.
"Hey, you got this." He encouraged.
"I know."
"You don't sound very confident."
"I'm not." You murmured, peering around a corner before rounding it. "But I'm gonna pretend to be."
"There you go. Fake it 'til you make it."
A mix between a scoff and a chuckle left you.
"Control room is up the way. Keep an eye out though, there might be some unsavory individuals in there."
That made your heart jump with dread. Unsavory individuals?
"Like who?"
"Ones in higher ranks, like generals."
"I see."
You proceeded down the corridor, pressing yourself behind another metal pillar to hide from more approaching stormtroopers. As soon as they passed, you got back to the mission.
"The doorway should be directly ahead of you." Poe informed.
"I see it."
A few feet in front of you was an open doorway, multiple uniformed people sitting in front of large control panels. Holding your breath, you drew closer to the doorway, daring to peer inside. Standing at the forefront of the room in front of a massive window and more controls was a man in a black uniform, probably a general, discussing something with another crew member.
"Just stick the tracker in a corner or something. Don't stay too long." Poe's voice spoke into your ear.
With the last listening device in hand, you scanned your surroundings and took a step into the control room, spotting one of those structural pillars. The little device was placed into the junction between the wall and the column, unable to be spotted unless someone was really looking for it.
Back on the ship, Poe watched the red dot on his little handheld tracker screen as it moved along the halls of the First Order ship.
"You got it?" He asked.
"Yeah."
"Nice work." He grinned. "I knew you could do it. Now get back here and let's split."
"Copy that."
His eyes stayed locked on the red dot traversing the map as he gave you directions. Every few feet, you'd stop, assumably to hide from passerby in the ship, before resuming.
"Almost there." He said.
You were approaching the hangar, only one turn down the hall and you'd be home free.
The dot stopped moving.
A gasp sounded from your end and Poe's heart sank.
"Y/n?"
"Well, well, well. What's this?" A male voice spoke, sounding close to you.
More panicked noises came through, getting quieter before Poe heard a distant "No!" from you before the feed got staticky, a crunch, and then silence.
"Y/n?" The panic in the pilot's voice rose. "Are you there? Do you copy?"
Nothing.
Poe looked out the windshield of the First Order ship he used to sneak in, peering down at the stormtroopers lingering about. Some of them had their hands held to the side of their helmets before turning to look directly at the spacecraft Poe was occupying.
"Blast!" He hissed through his teeth.
Not only had he lost contact with you, but it seems whoever caught you had notified everyone on board. He had no choice but to hightail it out of there, lest he get captured as well.
"Sorry, Y/n." He murmured, sitting upright in his seat and starting up the ship. "New plan."
The stormtroopers below started shooting at the spacecraft as it lifted off the floor, the hangar door beginning to close. Poe pushed the handles on the control panel forward and the ship plowed down the troopers close by.
"C'mon. C'mon." He spoke through clenched teeth, directing the spacecraft towards the exit, picking up speed.
The gap was slowly closing and it seemed Poe wasn't gonna make it. He winced as the top of the ship scraped against the closing hangar door, not doubt denting and scratching the exterior, as it slipped out into the open space.
A sigh of relief left the pilot as he made his escape, silently vowing to come back with a whole team of Resistance fighters to bring you home just as he promised.
You'd been listening to instructions from Poe, coming to a stop to peer around the corner when he told you to take a turn. That's when someone grabbed you from behind, making you gasp. You couldn't see who it was as you struggled in their grip.
"Y/n?" Poe asked.
"Well, well, well. What's this?" A male voice spoke, a gloved hand moving into your peripherals as your earpiece was pulled out and dropped to the floor.
"No!" You exclaimed.
You could barely hear Poe's panicked voice from the device as it fell, clattering to the metal flooring, your captor swiftly crushing it under his chunky black boot.
You writhed in his hold, somehow managing to slip out, stumbling forward and reaching for your lightsaber which you withdrew from its holster and activated it, the green beam humming as it extended from the hilt.
Your enemy, who donned an all-black outfit and a hood that concealed his face, activated his own saber, a blazing red beam lengthening at his side.
With hardly any time to react, you held your lightsaber up, blocking an aggressive attack from the Sith in front of you. Any anxiety you felt was numbed by your survival instincts and the desire to make it back home—if that was even an option anymore. For all you knew, Poe could've abandoned the mission for the sake of safety.
Clenching your teeth, you pushed back against the red beam with all the power you could muster, getting the Sith away just long enough to scramble backwards down the corridor. It didn't take long before he was back on you again, swinging left and right while you blocked and dodged his attempted attacks. Your back hit a door and your free hand felt for a button, pressing it. A hissing sound came from the hatch as the doors slid open and you staggered backwards inside. The area had electrical panels on the wall and was more spacious than the ship's corridor, giving you more room to fight and move around.
The Sith strode into the room with you and swiped at your side, which you barely evaded. In turn, you let out a grunt and swung your weapon at his chest, which he leaned back and avoided with ease.
Straightening his posture, he brandished his lightsaber in preparation, his boots thumping heavily against the floors as he approached. A shout left the hooded man as he swung at you, the saber making a resounding voosh as the blade was forced through the air.
Your eyes widened as his saber collided with yours harshly, the force behind the action making you stumble back slightly, your arms trembling as you tried to push back against it.
You weren't prepared for this.
All that training and you weren't prepared.
With a jerk of his lightsaber, The Sith knocked your weapon right out of your hand, causing it to deactivate and skid across the room.
The cloaked figure held his weapon above his head, spinning while thrusting the blade in your direction, the force of the showy action causing his hood to fly off just as you fell to the ground trying to back away.
"Ugh!" A grunt was forced out of your body as you collided with the floor, your eyes staring down the humming red beam pointed directly at your throat.
Your chest moved up and down rapidly with each shallow breath, looking up at your attacker with wide, horrified eyes as you realized his hood had flown off. Every limb in your body went cold, the blood draining from your face in an instant.
"Seonghwa?"
His hair was longer, reaching just above his shoulders, some of the long strands stuck to his forehead from the intense fight. His eyes, which you remembered being round and full of warmth, were now sharp and cold as ice. Your best friend had fallen victim to the Dark Side.
His eyes widened for just a millisecond at the sound of his name before narrowing, his gaze hardened and full of contempt as if just seeing you brought back unwanted memories.
"What did they do to you?" Your voice came out in a faint whisper of shock and horror.
"They didn't do anything to me."
His tone was harsh and calloused, no sign of the once upbeat and soft-spoken Seonghwa you knew three years ago.
The severity of the situation hit you and you began scrambling back away from the deadly red beam of light in your face, your arm reaching out to bring your own saber back to you. It slowly started rolling towards you only for Seonghwa to stretch an open hand out towards it, intercepting it and throwing the weapon across the room by an invisible force.
"You may have been a better fighter, but you always were a horrible user of the Force." He spat.
The doors to the room hissed and two stormtroopers walked in.
"Take her away." Seonghwa ordered sternly watching you with an unchanging and stoic expression as you were roughly tugged to your feet and dragged out of the room. "Detention cell 1117." He specified.
There were so many things you wanted to say, yet nothing came from your lips. All you could do was stare at Seonghwa with an expression full of confusion and hurt as you were hauled out of the room.
The cell you were placed in was nothing like you expected; it was clean and equipped with a small, but cushioned cot. The stormtroopers shoved you into the room, slamming the door shut, giving you one glance through the gated window before marching away.
You dropped down onto the cot, your trembling knees no longer able to support you, letting you collapse.
Seonghwa.
He didn't run away, he became a Sith. All these years worrying and wondering where he was, if he was okay, asking yourself why he left... and he was here.
How did this happen?
It was the question that kept spinning in your mind, echoing repeatedly.
How did this happen?
There was no way Seonghwa, your best friend, the man you secretly liked, had turned to the Dark Side. It didn't make sense. He never showed any desire to cross over, not that you could recall, anyway.
The dull ache in your heart grew in intensity the longer you thought about what your best friend had turned into.
The heavy thump of approaching footsteps made you lift your head, your eyes locking with those of the man you once knew. The door to your cell swung open and he stepped inside, his presence alone shifting the air in the room.
No words were exchanged at first. All you could do was stare at him, taking in the angry lines etched on his otherwise flawless face. His intense eyes stared you down, the scowl on his face not budging. This new version of Seonghwa was jarring to say the least, but he was still someone you used to know.
"So this is where you ran off to." You murmured.
He didn't speak, staring you down in silence. His lack of response was both perplexing and agitating. Did he have nothing to say?
You scoffed, shaking your head as a spark of anger ignited. "I can't believe you." Your expression was full of emotion, rage fueled by sadness and betrayal. It felt like you'd been punched directly in the heart.
Seeing Seonghwa again wasn't the joyous reunion you imagined it would be—it was much worse. Instead of embracing him in a tearful hug, you had been blocking his aggressive attacks and trying to make it out of the battle unscathed.
As Seonghwa stood just inside the cell, the emotions you felt rapidly turned into fiery anger that unfortunately reared it's ugly head.
"You got weak." You spoke through gritted teeth, your fists clenching.
In a fit of sudden rage, you stood up from the cot and charged at Seonghwa with a shout.
Your breath hitched when you felt a pressure around your throat, your wide eyes staring at the man you called your best friend with a gloved hand outstretched and fingers partially curled. A strained noise left your dry mouth as you clawed at your throat futilely, desperate to get rid of the invisible force that constricted your windpipe.
"You're the weak one." Seonghwa spoke, his voice low and threatening as his extended arm lifted higher, his gaze boring holes into you.
"Pl-please." You choked out, your legs kicking as your feet left the floor, black spots dotting your vision.
His hand squeezed more, curling in just another inch or so and applying more crushing pressure to your windpipe.
"Hwa." You whimpered, your voice nothing but a hoarse and whispered plea.
"Don't call me that." He hissed through clenched teeth. "That name died when Luke did. It's Mars now."
That's the last thing you heard before the black creeping in your peripherals took over.
"Do you ever feel like you have a weight to carry?" You asked Seonghwa, gazing up at the star-dotted galaxy above, seated in a cross-legged position on top of the Millennium Falcon. "Like a burden?"
"A burden?" Seonghwa echoed. "You mean like with glorious purpose?"
You sat there for a moment before shaking your head. "No. That's not it. That's someone else." You paused, reconsidering. "Though maybe it is glorious purpose in a way." You murmured mostly to yourself. "Being Luke's only two apprentices is a huge honor, especially since there aren't many Jedi being trained anymore, but do you ever feel you're expected to be this outstanding prodigy? Like you have all these expectations to live up to?"
Seonghwa hummed thoughtfully. "No. I see it more as a goal to reach."
"But do you think it's attainable? Don't you ever worry you won't be good enough?"
"Of course I worry. Everyone does, but I don't think Luke would've chosen us if he didn't think we were capable." Seonghwa turned to you, his hand sliding over to take hold of yours and give it a squeeze. His touch was warm and brought comfort to you almost immediately, chasing away your worries. "Let's switch to a brighter subject, like lightsabers."
You raised your brows, shooting Seonghwa an unimpressed look at his pun.
"That was completely unintentional."
"Whatever you say." You teased.
"Back on the subject, when do you think Luke will let us build our lightsabers?"
"When he thinks we've earned it, I guess."
"I hope it's soon."
You nodded in agreement, turning back to the stars above, your gaze drifting to look at the distant planets surrounding Ajan Kloss.
"You know, one day we're going to be real Jedi." Seonghwa's voice broke you from your daze.
"I know. Despite the lingering worries, I'm looking forward to the day when our training is complete."
"Can you imagine? The two of us going on missions together, tag-teaming the First Order, taking down the Sith." He held his hands out in front of him, holding an imaginary lightsaber as he mimicked its noises, swinging it left and right.
His little performance made you giggle, his laid back and silly personality always bringing a smile to your face.
"Then maybe I'd do one of these." He held his hand out towards the ground below, a small rock lifting from the grass as it was flung off into the night by an invisible force.
You chuckled amusedly. "Always trying to show off those abilities, huh?"
"No." He grinned softly. "But if you and I are ever in battle and someone gets too close to you, I won't hesitate to Force choke them."
His comment jarred you a bit and you shook your head. "We don't do that."
"I know... but I'd do anything to protect you."
A small noise left the back of your throat when your eyes cracked open, your mind fuzzy as you slowly came to. Your eyelids fluttered, blurred by tears which you blinked away, eyes adjusting to the dim holding cell you'd been tossed into earlier. Bringing a hand up, you wiped the small amount of wetness away from your eyes and propped yourself up on your elbow, wincing when you felt a soreness in your neck. Your hand moved down to your throat, gingerly touching the tender skin, hissing softly at the sensation that followed.
You swallowed back tears that threatened to well up, realizing just how much Seonghwa had changed. He physically hurt you.
Not once did it occur to you that Seonghwa had crossed over to the Dark Side. There wasn't an ounce of evil in him, so it was never a possibility. You just assumed he had given up being a Jedi and went off to another planet to live a life away from the Resistance. Luke's passing hurt both of you and you wouldn't have blamed Seonghwa if he refused to be taught by anyone else.
But that's not what happened.
The Dark Side got to him... or someone.
Seonghwa's eyes watched his superior intently as he paced about the control room, his cape billowing dramatically behind him.
"Why was she here?" The maroon-haired Sith hissed angrily. "How did a Jedi sneak in here?"
"The troopers told me she arrived with someone else on a First Order ship." Seonghwa responded, his hands resting behind his back.
"They have one of our ships?" He spoke through gritted teeth, jaw tightening.
"It appears so."
"Go talk to her. Ask her what she was doing here. Do whatever it takes to get the information if she refuses to talk."
"We have people for that." Seonghwa mentioned, feeling his gut twist uncomfortably at the thought of facing you again.
"I want you to interrogate her. Do you have a problem with that, Mars?"
"No."
"Then do as I say. Interrogate her."
"Yes, Hongjoong."
You sat upright when the door to your cell groaned open, your eyes landing on Seonghwa. Your body moved on its own, scooting back on the cot to put more distance between you both. Perhaps you subconsciously feared him a little now after what he did to you.
He noticed the way you cowered a bit, but his expression remained the same, unchanging and giving away no indications of how it made him feel.
"Why are you here?" He inquired firmly, his voice carrying authority.
His question was met with complete silence. This agitated him, his jaw ticking with annoyance. "Answer me."
"I won't." The words were uttered quietly.
"Why are you here?" He asked again.
You shook your head. "I won't tell you."
Seonghwa lifted his hand and you flinched, waiting for the pressure on your throat. Instead, he lowered his arm, dropping it at his side.
"I know the Resistance sent you." He almost spat the name out in distaste. "Why?"
"You know I'm not gonna tell you."
He let out a small growl, his top lip twitching.
"You're in no position to withhold information from me."
That sparked a bit of annoyance, your almost cowardly behavior changing as you sat up straighter on the cot. "Oh yeah? What about how you withheld information from me?"
Seonghwa's brow twitched at your harsh and sharply-spoken words.
"You didn't think to tell me you were considering running away?"
"Why would I have told you?" His eyes narrowed. "It wasn't your business."
"Because I'm your friend... or at least I was. If something was bothering you, you should've told me."
"Friend?" He scoffed. "You were teacher's pet."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Don't play dumb. You were Luke's favorite. He always praised your fighting style and nitpicked mine, said I was too showy and aggressive. Well, I found a place that accepted my fighting style—accepted me."
"Luke accepted you, Seonghwa."
"Don't call me that."
"It's your name."
"Not anymore."
There was a long and heavy silence that followed and it almost felt like, in that time, you were mourning the loss of a friend.
"She what?" General Leia stared wide eyed at Poe who'd just relayed to her that you had been captured.
"They got her."
Leia sighed, lowering her head.
"She planted all the devices though." He added. "So we can listen in and see what they're up to."
She nodded. "We need to start getting a rescue team together for Y/n as soon as possible. Until we're able to bring her back, we see what information we can get from the devices she planted. Pull up the audio." She gestured towards Han Solo, who stood beside her.
He messed with the control panel in front of him, pressing buttons until voices came through.
"What do you mean she won't talk?" An angry male voice questioned.
"She won't tell me why she's here." A second male voice spoke, this one deeper than the first. "She refused."
Leia's brows twitched as she and Han shared a look, both of them finding the voice familiar.
"I told you do whatever it takes to get her to talk." The first male continued, sounding more vexed than a few moments prior.
"I—"
"Does this Jedi girl mean something to you, Mars? Are you going soft?"
"No." The response was firm and clipped.
Han reached up to rub at his scruff contemplatively, his mouth downturned in a deep frown. "I know that voice."
Leia turned to him in silent question. She also recognized the voice but couldn't quite place it.
Han sighed, dropping his hand. "It's Seonghwa."
Three days passed, or what you assumed was days. It was hard to tell. Seonghwa continuously came back to question you, sometimes multiple times a day. You refused every time, not daring to give away any information. He often became irate at your refusal and stubbornness, but he never harmed you again.
Seonghwa stood on the opposite side of your small cell, arms crossed and thick brows tugged together, that same scowl on his face.
"You were sent here by the Resistance. Why?"
"You're the one giving them information on our base, aren't you?" You responded to his question with one of your own.
Being locked away, you had time to think. And now that you knew Seonghwa was a Sith and the First Order was working on finding the Resistance base, it only made sense that your old pal was helping and possibly feeding them information.
"No." He denied firmly, his reaction almost coming across as offended that you'd assume such a thing.
"What do you mean no?"
"I haven't told them anything." He hissed through gritted teeth.
That made you pause, whatever response you had prepared died in your throat the second that sentence left his mouth.
"Why?" Was the only word uttered.
"I'm asking the questions here. Why were you sent here? Did Leia send you?"
Your expression hardened, but Seonghwa saw right through it.
He scoffed. "I knew it."
A sharp puff of air expelled from your nostrils as you mentally cursed yourself for not denying it right away. Though there's no telling if he would've believed you or not, especially if he claimed to already know.
"Why did she send you? Why were you lurking the halls?"
"I won't tell you. I'm loyal to the Resistance and I won't do anything to put them in danger."
"Of course you won't." Scoffed Seonghwa again, your answer not surprising. "How loyal of you." His words were laced with venom and mockery as he spat them out.
It made an uncomfortable knot form in your stomach, wondering what lies they fed your friend to make him so full of loathing.
Every interrogation ended with Seonghwa storming out of your cell in a fit of rage, reporting back to Hongjoong with no new information and receiving a harsh verbal assault in return. It was a repetitive pattern and one the former Jedi was growing tired of.
"It's been a week." Hongjoong hissed out, pacing the control room. "And you still have no information for me."
"She refuses to speak."
"Perhaps she needs someone more forceful."
"No!" Seonghwa took a step towards Hongjoong to block him as he attempted to exit the room. He then cleared his throat before repeating in a more stern and confident manner, "No. I have it under control."
"If you had it under control you would've tortured her until she spilled. Then I wouldn't be waiting for intel. I'll interrogate her."
Seonghwa side stepped again. "I said I have it under control." He doubled down on his words.
Hongjoong's expression hardened, his intense gaze searching Seonghwa's face for what felt like an eternity before speaking.
"Three days. If you haven't given me any useful information by then, I'm stepping in."
"Yes, Hongjoong."
The following day, Seonghwa was back in your cell, staring at you with the same stony expression. "When will you give up?"
"Never."
"Tch." He scoffed at your never-ending defiance.
"Why do you keep grilling me?"
"Because you're the prisoner here and my superior wants to know why you were sneaking around the ship like a little womp rat."
Your features twitched in mild agitation at his slightly stinging words. "How do you feel knowing your buddies are trying to track down the location of our home?"
Seonghwa scowled and crossed his arms. "It's not our home."
"It is. You still have a place there, Seonghwa."
"Quit calling me that." He hissed out through gritted teeth.
The room grew quiet and you were left to sit in complete silence for a few moments until you spoke up again with another query.
"You know where the Resistance base is. Why haven't you told them?" You asked, knowing that if he relayed that information to his superiors, the First Order would've already attacked Ajan Kloss by now.
Seonghwa stiffened almost imperceptibly and you wouldn't have noticed if you weren't focused on his body language.
"That's not my business."
"Oh but it is. It's your former home, as you claim, so wether you're willing to accept it or not, you have ties to it. If you despise the Jedi so much why haven't you exposed us?" You questioned pointedly. "Why haven't you given away our whereabouts and watched our planet get destroyed?"
It was clear he was growing indignant, his sharp brows tugging closer together, forming eleven lines between them—a sign he was provoked by your words.
"I'll be back to question you again tomorrow. You'd better be ready to give me what I want or it won't end well for you, Y/n." There was an undertone of foreboding in his words as he turned on the heel of his boot and exited the cell, his black cape billowing behind him.
He paused just outside the room, his dark eyes turning to stare at you through the gated window for a moment before he walked away.
Seonghwa paced around his room, tugging frustratingly at his hair while having an internal battle with himself. Why? Why hadn't he told Hongjoong or anyone on the ship about the Resistance base when he'd been actively watching them follow leads and attempting to track down the group? He knows the location. Not only that, but he's had multiple opportunities to divulge that he knows who you are, yet he's kept his mouth shut. He could've easily said something, so why hadn't he?
His ambivalence on the matter was making his head ache. On one hand, he had grown to loathe the Resistance with every fiber of his being and would do anything to destroy them, but on the other... no.
Seonghwa shook his head, gripping at his hair out of agitation while dropping down to sit on the edge of his bed.
"Don't be weak." He gritted out.
There is no "on the other hand". He despised the Resistance. He didn't care about anyone there.
A ghostly giggle echoed in his mind, your giggle, one he remembered from the past. Along with it came a flash of you sitting across from him with a bright smile on your face, then a fleeting image of Master Luke.
Seonghwa gave an angry shout, standing up and withdrawing his lightsaber, activating the red beam that hummed when extended fully. His shoulders heaved up and down with each labored breath while his eyes scanned the empty bedroom.
His weapon lowered. No one was there. What was he trying to fight? His past?
The lightsaber was deactivated and Seonghwa slowly sat back down on his bed, the mattress sinking under his weight. His grip on the hilt of his saber tightened as his mind wandered back to you. He had to get information out of you or Hongjoong would step in and he didn't want that.
As soon as the revelation passed his conscious mind, Seonghwa froze. Why did he care wether or not Hongjoong interrogated you? He shook his head as if to push away any notions that he still cared for you. He didn't—did he?
"Why did you have to show up, huh?" Seonghwa asked pointedly the next day while trying to interrogate you once again. It was the first question he asked when he entered your prison cell.
"I'm sorry?"
"You've just made everything more complicated!" He spat, letting his emotions run rampant.
Perplexed, baffled, caught off guard—any one of those words or phrases could've described how you felt in that moment. What did he mean?
"I was doing just fine without you." He added, the harshness in his tone unwavering.
You recoiled at his words, murmuring, "I don't understand."
"Of course you wouldn't."
"What are you talking about?"
"This is your fault!" He pointed an accusatory finger at you.
Your wide eyes locked on the tip of his index finger that was directed at you.
"What's my fault? Seonghwa, I—"
He let out a raging shout that reverberated on the metal walls. "There you go again! Just stop!" He dropped his head, gripping handfuls of inky hair, letting out strained sounds through his teeth. His inner turmoil was showing through his aggressive responses and bouts of fury.
"Talk to me." Your gentle words reached Seonghwa's ears, striking him directly in the chest.
Instead of being snippy with your words, you toned it down, especially after witnessing his display of stress. It didn't matter if he was a Sith. That fact didn't erase any of the memories you shared together and you still thought of him as a friend—or at the very least, a friend that could be redeemed.
The kindness in your voice touched Seonghwa, but at the same time it was making things worse for him, leaving him torn between two opposing emotions.
"I left that life behind." He said, his head still buried in his hands. "Seeing you just... stirred things up."
Ever so slowly, you got up off the cot and took a few tentative steps towards him. He didn't realize you were approaching, too caught up in his own emotions. It was only when he felt your hand gently touch his shoulder that he flinched, raising his head.
"Why'd you leave? What happened?" You asked.
"I was upset." He sighed. "I tried to get my anger out by blowing off steam in the training room but that wasn't enough. So I stole a junky ship and took it out to a nearby planet just to get away from everything for a bit." His eyes showed just how much he was struggling as he spoke.
"Go on." You urged him. "I know you might not think so, but you're still my friend."
His eyes met yours, a flicker of warmth growing in his chest and giving him that little push to continue. "I was walking through a little town trying to clear my head when Hongjoong approached me."
"Who's Hongjoong?"
"My superior." He ran a hand through his long messy hair. "He knew right away that I was a Jedi. He took me into a nearby tavern and bought me a drink. We talked. I told him about Master Luke and how it was frustrating sometimes because I felt as if I wasn't enough. He was so... sympathetic. He made me feel important and told me he would be a better teacher than Luke and that I had untapped potential—that I had purpose Luke didn't see."
"He got to you while you were vulnerable." You stated, shaking your head. "He got into your head, Seonghwa."
"No." His brows creased, eyes narrowing as he responded in a stern manner, jerking away from your hand on his shoulder. "He didn't. When he took me in I was able to fight the way I wanted. I got stronger when Hongjoong trained me."
You shook your head. "He manipulated you."
"He didn't." Seonghwa denied firmly. "Because of him, I realized my purpose."
Your expression fell into one of pity and sorrow as you shook your head, realizing just how badly this Hongjoong guy had warped your old friend's way of thinking.
"I shouldn't expect you to understand." Seonghwa remarked bitterly. "You're a narrow-minded Jedi."
His words hurt, punching you directly in the chest. You really thought you were getting somewhere with him.
"This was a mistake." He grumbled, turning to leave. He let himself get too vulnerable.
"Seong—" The cell door slammed shut, making you wince. "...hwa."
Heaving a sigh, you slumped back against the wall in defeat. You almost caught a glimpse of the old Seonghwa. He was opening up, but he still believed Hongjoong was the good guy in this situation. The hold he had on Seonghwa was too strong and you needed to break it.
The Sith's footsteps were heavy, each thump from his boots echoing down the corridor while a violent storm of thoughts swirled around his head. You were so sweet and genuine, it almost reminded him of how things used to be. And that gentle touch of your hand on his shoulder sparked something.
You're getting weak. He could practically hear Hongjoong. Are you really going to let her get to you with all that mushy stuff?
"No."
Seems that way.
Seonghwa's jaw tightened as if this were all happening in real life.
"I said no."
You're still in love with her, Mars.
"I'm not."
He passed by a couple stormtroopers standing guard on that particular cell block, their heads following the Sith as he passed, muttering to himself.
"What are you looking at?" He snarled at the staring pair, his hand raising as a threat to use his Force abilities on them.
"Nothing." They shook their heads frantically.
"Thought so." He spat, continuing down the corridor.
That night was a sleepless one for Seonghwa. He tossed and turned for what was probably hours, unable to even doze off. Tossing back his black sheets, he swung his legs off the bed, letting out a forceful sigh. You really messed with his head... and his heart. He could still feel the way you laid your hand so gingerly upon his shoulder.
He got to his feet and shuffled over to a wooden chest at the foot of his bed, opening the lid and reaching inside, producing your lightsaber from it. After he had you taken away, he picked up the saber and had been keeping it in his bedroom, unable to hand it over to the seized weapons department for some reason. He gazed down almost wistfully at the silver hilt adorned with unique engravings. His thumb absentmindedly traced over the patterns engrained into the metal while his mind wandered back to a memory that had long been locked away.
"Place the energy core near the kyber crystal." Luke instructed, watching you and Seonghwa.
The components of your lightsabers were scattered along the work table as each of you focused on building your respective weapons, listening to each step you were given.
"Next is the focusing ring. Make sure it's calibrated just right or—"
"Or the kyber crysal will crack." You and Seonghwa finished in unison, chuckling in amusement at the situation.
"Yes, or your sabers could explode when you activate them." Luke added.
The pieces were put into place and you moved on to the next step, adding each component until the assembly was complete. Next came the cosmetic aspects of the process, the step that would give your lightsabers their unique appearances.
The both of you were taught how to customize your weapons with Luke by your side to assist when needed. This ritual of sorts meant a lot to you and Seonghwa, as it was a rite of passage, a symbol that you had grown as Jedi.
"I hope my lightsaber is blue." Seonghwa murmured once the assembly was complete, always having favored that color.
"There's only one way to find out." You placed your thumb on the power button of your saber and counted down before activating your respective weapons.
Just as Seonghwa had hoped, a blue beam extended from his hilt and his eyes went wide with excitement. He then turned to look at your humming blade that glowed a unique purple.
"Not many people have that color." He gaped.
Your round eyes stared at the stunning beam in awe, unable to believe that the weapon you wielded was yours.
Seonghwa felt the same, gaping at his own lightsaber, feeling it's weight and ogling at the shiny chrome silver metal of the hilt.
"I'm glad I got to do this with you." You turned and smiled fondly at Seonghwa, your eyes glimmering with unadulterated joy.
He returned that warm grin. "Me too."
A single tear dropped onto the handle of your lightsaber, stirring Seonghwa from his nostalgic daze. He blinked away some of the moisture in his eyes before wiping them, not realizing he had started crying.
He still cared for you.
He still loved you.
Today. Seonghwa had to get answers today or Hongjoong would step in and take matters into his own hands. He decided last night when he couldn't sleep that he didn't want that to happen and he would do whatever it took to get the necessary information out of you.
"How many days has it been?" You asked when you heard the door groan open, your back facing it.
"Ten." Seonghwa responded, standing just inside the room as he'd been doing since day one. "I'm asking again, why were you on the ship? Why were you sent here?"
You rolled over, your expression weary. "So we're back to this?"
Seonghwa didn't answer, his expression showing hardly any emotion. He was there with a task to complete.
"Tell me." He wasn't demanding or hateful, but there was a tinge of urgency in his tone.
You sat up, pushing back your hair with a sigh. "Can we just drop this for a second?"
He appeared unsure, but let out a reluctant exhale and moved across the small space to sit beside you on the bed. It was the first time he'd done so since you were locked away.
"I missed you, y'know." You didn't care if he believed you or not. You had to let him know.
His gaze lifted to meet yours, his eyes becoming round just like your memories recalled.
"It hurt me when you disappeared. I had just lost Master Luke and then I lost you not long after. It crushed me." Your voice was thick with emotion as you spoke. "I always wondered where you were. I worried about you. I lost sleep over you. I never once thought you'd turn to the Dark Side."
"Neither did I, but I fit well here."
"No you don't. That Hongjoong guy got to you while you were vulnerable and took advantage of your weak state. He got in your head and made you feel special. He doesn't care about you like he says he does."
"And how would you know?"
"Because he's a Sith and they're known for being conniving and manipulative."
Seonghwa became quiet, not fully believing your words about Hongjoong being disingenuous, but feeling as if he shouldn't carelessly disregard them either. Despite that, a sense of urgency to defend his superior rose up within him. "Hongjoong was there for me and picked me up when I was at my lowest."
"I could have done that. I would have done that if you hadn't left."
Seonghwa's jaw tightened as an uncomfortable ache became present in his chest. Perhaps guilt?
"I loved you, Seonghwa."
Those next words were a punch directly to the gut, the breath feeling like it was knocked out of him. You loved him? For how long?
He swallowed thickly, his breathing shaky. "Why did Leia send you here? To collect information? To spy?" Again, his tone wasn't demanding, but it was stern.
It hurt not having him respond to your admission, but instead of letting it get to you, you pushed aside your feelings and looked him in the eye. "I won't betray the Resistance. You can keep me here as long as you see fit, but I won't say a word."
It was obvious you didn't realize the magnitude of the situation, but Seonghwa remained somewhat calm, hoping a more gentle approach would coax it out of you.
"You don't trust me anymore?"
"No." Your response was swift. "I don't. You're the enemy now."
"But you said you still saw me as a friend."
"There's exceptions to that statement."
He was getting nowhere with you yet again. However, you did open up about how you felt when he ran away so perhaps there was hope.
"Fine." He stood up and left without another word, hoping to get more time to interrogate.
Hongjoong was discussing something with one of the navigators on the ship when Seonghwa approached. "Ah, Mars." He strode towards his apprentice. "I hope you have good news for me."
"I'm getting through to her."
The redhead's expression fell into one of disappointment and annoyance. "So you haven't got any information out of her?"
"I'm trying to. I've taken a different approach and she's coming around."
"But you still haven't got any information out of her." He stated factually.
"No, not yet. I just need one more d—"
Hongjoong's jaw tightened and he held his hand up, Seonghwa's breath hitching as he was forced aside, the invisible pressure around his throat increasing.
"Three days, I said."
"I... know." Seonghwa choked out.
"I gave you three days and you still have absolutely nothing. You're useless, Mars." He spat out.
Seonghwa gasped for air, his booted feet slipping along the flooring while he was being held slightly off the ground.
Hongjoong released his invisible grip on Seonghwa who fell to his knees, leaned over his hands which were planted on the floor as he took in ragged breaths.
Looking around, he saw some of the control room staff turned in their seats staring at him as he lie crumpled and weak on the floor. Meanwhile, Hongjoong was talking to a stormtrooper as if he hadn't Force strangled his apprentice. In that moment, as he was struggling to bring air back into his lungs he realized you were right. Hongjoong didn't care about him.
You're useless, Mars. The words echoed in his mind on repeat.
"Take me to her cell." Hongjoong's voice reached Seonghwa's ears, causing him to lift his head. "If you want things to get done you have to do them yourself." He complained to the trooper, taking a glance back at Seonghwa with a demeaning expression.
"Wait!" He coughed.
The maroon-haired Sith paused and turned to look down at Seonghwa who was just managing to get to his feet.
"You said three days. The day isn't over yet." He spoke hoarsely, but kept a steady tone so as not to give away how his lungs burned.
"Alright. I want results by the end of the day."
The door to your cell opened up and to your surprise, it was Seonghwa again. He sometimes showed up multiple times a day to interrogate you, but never this quickly. It had only been about ten minutes since he left.
He was rubbing at his throat with a gloved hand, his eyes looking frantic.
Something was wrong.
"Seonghwa?"
"Look, I need you to give me a reason as to why you were sent." There was that sense of urgency in his tone again, more obvious than earlier. And he didn't even snap at you for calling him by his real name.
"What happened?"
"Things won't be good for you if you don't cooperate." He ignored your question and you noticed how scratchy his voice sounded.
It wasn't hard to put two and two together.
"He hurt you."
Seonghwa stiffened and you knew your assumption was correct.
"You have to tell me, Y/n." His gaze turned serious and the desperation in his tone rose. "If you don't..." He hesitated to continue, but did so anyway. "Hongjoong is going to interrogate you instead and he won't be gentle or kind."
You'd known Seonghwa since you were kids and could tell when he was worried, but this wasn't worry—this was fear. All this time you'd refused to speak and all it took for you to crack was for Seonghwa to be in distress.
"I was planting listening devices." You caved, spilling almost immediately.
"Where?"
"In the West corridor near the hangar, in a meeting room, and in the control room where the ship is piloted."
His eyes met yours, turmoil and concern swirling around his brown irises. "I'm sorry it had to be like this."
And that was the last thing he said before turning away and leaving.
"I have news." Seonghwa announced, entering the control room.
Hongjoong turned towards him, an expectant look on his face.
"She cracked."
"It's about time."
"The Resistance base is on Takodana."
"Takodana?" Hongjoong repeated, raising a brow. "She told you that?"
"Yes."
"It's not the information I asked for."
"But it's helpful to us. It's what we've been working towards for weeks." Seonghwa mentioned.
"That's true." Hongjoong gazed out at the vast galaxy.
"Who cares why she was on the ship? We have their location."
Hongjoong nodded, murmuring, "Takodana, huh? Why didn't I think of that? It's a forest planet; the perfect place to go off the grid."
"Exactly."
Hongjoong snapped his fingers, beckoning the First Order's battle coordinator over. "I want you to send a fleet to Takadona right away." He ordered.
"Yes, sir." The man nodded before marching off.
Hongjoong passed Seonghwa, stopping long enough to say, "Maybe you can be useful after all."
His watchful eyes followed the redhead until he left the room before he made any moves of his own, exiting the control area and heading directly for the meeting room.
There was only one room on the ship used for meetings and Seonghwa knew exactly where it was.
Slipping into the empty meeting room, he surveyed the area, checking in crevices and corners before peeking underneath the large circular table in the middle of the area. Sure enough, there was a small device no bigger than the tip of his finger under the edge of the table. Stepping away, he began pacing around, mulling over the gravity of what he was about to do. Taking in a deep breath, Seonghwa prepared himself for what he was about to say, knowing it would change everything.
"I don't know who's listening to this but I need your help. It's me..." He hesitated. "Seonghwa. I don't have time to explain everything but I've just told my superior the Resistance base is on Takodana. They're sending a fleet of troopers that way immediately. Reinforcements here will be low. I need you guys to come and get Y/n out of here." He paused before adding. "Get us out of here. I'm ready to come home."
With a call for help sent out and no time to waste, he could only hope someone was listening as he left the room and put his plan into motion.
He didn't greet you or say a single word when he stepped back into your cell, grabbing your hands and holding them behind your back.
"Come here."
You yelped as you were jerked to your feet.
"Seonghwa? What's going on?" You panicked, wiggling in his hold.
"Be quiet." He hissed, shoving you out the door and down the cell block corridor, stormtroopers watching as he passed.
One of them blocked the way. "What are you doing with her?"
"We've obtained the information we need. She's of no use to us anymore." He responded coldly to the trooper's inquiry.
Every part of your body ran cold upon hearing that and you started writhing even more.
"No! No! Please don't do this!" You cried out.
"I said be quiet!" Seonghwa jerked you harshly before pushing you down the halls once more.
Your breathing was erratic, your hands cold and clammy. Were you really going to die by the hands of your old friend?
Not a single word was spoken while you were guided through the maze that was the First Order ship, awaiting your demise. You were brought to a room and shoved inside, Seonghwa releasing your wrists and caging you against the wall before you could even process it.
"You don't know what you're doing." You spoke shakily. "Please don't kill me. I—"
Seonghwa's lips pressed firmly against yours, effectively cutting off your sentence. A small noise left the back of your throat, your hands pressing against his chest as you fought to keep your eyes from fluttering shut.
He pulled away shortly with a heavy exhale and half-lidded eyes that gazed at you with longing.
"I love you too, Y/n."
Your heart leapt into your throat as he verbally returned your feelings.
"You're... you're not gonna kill me?"
"What? No." He shook his head. "That was just so I didn't raise any suspicions. We're getting out of here."
"We are?" You uttered so quietly you barely heard yourself.
"Yes. This isn't the life for me, Y/n. I miss the Resistance. I miss you. Maybe I was a weak Sith—or maybe my love for you was stronger than the hold of the Dark Side."
"Seonghwa." Taking the sides of his face, you pulled him to your lips, kissing him deeply, this time letting your eyelids slide shut while relishing in the warmth of his mouth.
When you pulled away, he had to blink himself out of the little daze he was in.
"Wow."
"We'd better get out of here alive." You said.
"We will. Just play along."
You nodded. "Got it."
He took your wrists and held them behind your back again to keep up the facade and led you out of the room, back into the ship's corridor. He didn't know how quickly a rescue team could get out there, but if no one had arrived by the time he made it to the hangar, Seonghwa would hijack a ship and get you both out himself.
Your eyes scanned the halls, attempting to look pitiful and helpless when passing stormtroopers or staff. On the inside, however, you were elated that Seonghwa returned your feelings and decided to return to Ajan Kloss with you. Though there was the lingering anxiety of needing to get out safely first. You were still in enemy territory—you both were.
The two of you rounded a corner, nearly running into a man with maroon hair that you didn't recognize, you and Seonghwa taking a few steps back. There was an intimidating  aura about the stranger that made you nervous just by looking at him. His eyes narrowed and he turned to your partner.
"This is the Jedi that snuck onto the ship. Why is she out of her cell, Mars? I didn't approve of this."
"We've got the information we need. I'm disposing of her."
You assumed this was the Hongjoong guy you'd been told about and was quick to lower your gaze to the floor, trying to appear non-threatening.
"And why would you dispose of her?"
As they exchanged words, Seonghwa could tell he wouldn't be able to pull this one off. Hongjoong was asking too many questions and wondering why Seonghwa was making decisions on his own without consulting him first.
You too were feeling as if things were about to go south and began worrying about how to defend yourself. It was at that moment you felt something cool being pressed into your palm that was behind your back. Your fingers curled around the object and realized it was a lightsaber—your lightsaber.
"What's really going on here?" Hongjoong inquired. "You've been odd since this little Jedi showed up." He regarded you with a curt jerk of his head, not bothering to look your way.
"I already told you, I'm disposing of her."
"See..." Hongjoong's hand imperceptibly inched towards his lightsaber at his hip. "I just don't think I believe you."
Your eyes widened and you were quick to reveal your lightsaber, activating the purple beam that hummed to life just as Hongjoong withdrew his own weapon. Seonghwa was holding out his lightsaber as well, ready to fight by your side.
"Ah." Sardonic amusement flickered across Hongjoong's features at the sight of his apprentice. "I see. You've switched sides."
Seonghwa's expression hardened and he pointed the end of his red lightsaber at the man. "I'm not afraid to fight you."
"Well you should be." Hongjoong spoke roughly before stepping forward and taking a swipe at both of you.
Leaping back, you two dodged his attack, retaliating with some of your own, both of you swinging your weapons at the Sith who was able to block every single one. You attempted to take a jab at him, but his red beam came up underneath your purple one and pushed it away, making you stumble at the physical force behind the action. He twisted his upper body and held his saber up to block an attack from Seonghwa that followed after yours.
It was clear this man was well-trained and even though he was outnumbered, he was managing to fight both you and Seonghwa without much of a struggle. Taking a step back to put some space between you and the enemy, you continued fighting back.
As soon as he saw an opening, Seonghwa took hold of your wrist. "Come on." He hissed urgently and tugged you down the ship's dim corridors in the opposite direction, fleeing the area.
"You're running away like a coward, Mars!" Hongjoong shouted after him.
"Where are we going?" You asked, pushing past a stormtrooper that stood in the way.
"Get them!" Hongjoong roared in the distance.
"Somewhere away from him." Seonghwa responded, keeping a tight hold on your wrist while guiding you through the steel and metal maze.
While your first priority was to survive, questions started piling up. Questions like: Would you survive? Would you even make it off the ship? Would you ever get back home?
"Here." You were snapped out of your daze by Seonghwa's voice as you were pulled into an open space, a grated walkway stretching across an endless canyon.
Unable to see the bottom of the foggy abyss below, your heart rate spiked.
"Hey, it's alright. Just stay close." Seonghwa gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, hurrying across the bridge. "We can still make it to the hangar from here."
"There you are."
You both froze at the sound of Hongjoong's voice, spinning around to face him as he approached with an intense and almost psychotic look in his sharp eyes.
"Stay back." Seonghwa was quick to push you behind him and rush forward to engage in battle with his ex mentor. You leaned against the railing of the grated walkway, looking on with wide eyes.
Seonghwa let out a grunt when Hongjoong's saber clashed with his, pushing against it. With clenched teeth and trembling hands, he shoved back and managed to get Hongjoong off of him. The Sith let out a low sound of disproval and swung once more, relentlessly attacking Seonghwa and giving him no time to fight back. All he could do was block and guard himself from the onslaught. You couldn't stand watching the battle persist without you. There was no telling how long Seonghwa could maintain his defenses until he was worn out. With no one to watch his back or help take the pressure off, you feared he wouldn't make it out of the fight unscathed.
"What happened? You used to beat me all the time during our practice battles." Hongjoong talked down to Seonghwa in a derisive tone.
The ex Sith let out a low noise from the back of his throat while taking a swing at the redhead who merely leaned back to avoid the humming beam of light.
"You're weakened already." He remarked snidely. "Do you really want to go back to being a spineless Jedi?"
Instead of responding, Seonghwa narrowed his eyes and took another swing at Hongjoong only for him to dodge again.
"You belong here."
"I don't!" He snapped. "I never did."
"I took you in."
"You took advantage of me!"
"And you became a powerful Sith because of it. So you should be thanking me."
"Thanking you?" Scoffed Seonghwa. "For what? Turning me into an evil monster?"
Hongjoong let out a huff of amusement. "For showing you your true potential, Mars. So tell me, are you with me or against me?"
"My name is Seonghwa." He grit out through his teeth.
"Very well. Chitchat is over." Hongjoong used his foot to kick Seonghwa back, his body colliding with the steel flooring of the bridge. A grunt was forced out of him, his deactivated lightsaber now lying by Hongjoong's foot.
"You don't need this anymore." He said, kicking the weapon off the side of the walkway and into the abyss below.
"No. Stop!" You shouted, rushing towards the two, unable to stand by any longer. You didn't care if Seonghwa told you to stay back, he needed your help.
Hongjoong held up his free hand, a powerful force pushing you back so vigorously you were sent through the air. You yelped, landing roughly on the grates as your lightsaber skidded across the platform. The breath was knocked out of you during impact, your throat and lungs attempting to work correctly again while you gasped for air.
"This is what happens when you betray me, Mars." Hongjoong spoke in an eery singsong voice.
Your eyes widened as he moved to stand over Seonghwa, lightsaber positioned and ready to strike. A sudden burst of energy and determination hit you as well as a wave of burning hatred towards the maroon-haired Sith, fueling your need to protect Seonghwa.
Your hand shot out towards your deactivated weapon, wheezing and coughing as you focused your energy. The saber shot from its position at the edge of the bridge and straight into your palm. Gripping the hilt of the lightsaber, you got to your feet and rushed over.
"This is the end for you." Hongjoong reared back and went to swing his glowing blade down on Seonghwa. As he did so, your purple beam was thrust forward, blocking his before it could even get close to doing any damage.
"What?" Hongjoong hissed out, his eyes drifting up to meet yours that burned with rage.
"I don't think so." You spoke lowly, pushing upwards and using your lightsaber to shove his away.
Seonghwa stared up at you in both shock and awe, using the opportunity to scramble back out of the crossfire as you went after Hongjoong with vigor.
"Do. Not. Come. Near. Him." You spat out between attacks, punctuating your words with each clash of your blades.
"Oh. Well, this is certainly interesting." Hongjoong chuckled over the sounds of battle.
Your lightsabers made that familiar electric sound as they collided, swinging in every direction possible. Any time you saw an opening, you went for it, even if Hongjoong blocked. There was no pattern to your attacks, just endless swipes and vicious swings.
"You took him away from me!" You raged, slinging your lightsaber at him while he struggled to fight back. "Three years!"
He stumbled while trying to back away, blocking your relentless hits.
A flicker of panic flashed across Hongjoong's face as you continued to shout at him and deliver swing after swing. Up until that point, he had defended himself and didn't show an ounce of fear. Clearly, he wasn't expecting you to go into a blind rage, but seeing him preparing to end Seonghwa's life kicked you into gear.
Your saber came at him from the side, which he deflected, but you didn't care, redirecting and taking a different approach. He hissed when you managed to swipe at his arm, tearing the fabric of his sleeve and slicing his skin underneath.
"Look at you trying to defend your boyfriend. Such mindless violence. You would've made a good Sith." Hongjoong grunted out while trying to provoke you despite the fact that you clearly had the upper hand.
"Shut up." You grit out, slinging the purple beam you wielded at his leg, causing him to yelp in pain, pressing his free hand to his calf where the fresh cut was.
"I'm impressed." He panted heavily, looking up at you. "You're putting up quite the fight."
He tightened his hold on his lightsaber as your eyes narrowed. The humming beam in his grip came barreling towards you, making you jump back. He gave you no time to retaliate, coming at you again. At the last second, you held your hand out, fingers outstretched as his weapon came to a stop in midair just a few inches from you. The heat radiating from the blazing light brushed your palm, but it wasn't enough to deter you. Hongjoong's cocky expression fell, his eyes darting between you and your hand which was keeping his lightsaber in place. He pushed down, trying to complete his action, his brows pulling together at the effort and exertion. Your hardened gaze stayed locked on the Sith as you moved your open hand forward, forcing the beam further away until you pushed it aside. He stumbled back, releasing a low guttural sound from the back of his throat.
"Not bad... for a Jedi."
Your jaw tightened at his backhanded comment. "You talk too much."
Blinded by anger, your free hand shot out, using the Force to launch him backwards across the bridge and all the way into the halls of the ship where he landed harshly against a wall. He winced upon impact, sliding down and crumpling on the floor in a heap.
The adrenaline coursing through you slowly started to wear off, your shoulders heaving up and down with each breath.
"I thought Jedi didn't Force choke?" Seonghwa asked amusedly from behind you while getting to his feet, referring back to something you said to him years ago.
"That was a Force push. There's a difference." You remarked with a small grin, deactivating your lightsaber and sliding it into its holster.
"That was... kinda hot."
You turned to him as he came to stand by your side, a hint of a smirk playing at your lips. "Was it?"
"It was." He confirmed, taking your hand. "Now let's get out of here."
The both of you hurried across the grated walkway and past Hongjoong's unconscious form, heading back the way you came, your footsteps thumping against the metal floors.
"Hongjoong ordered a fleet of ships to Takodana." Seonghwa mentioned while you moved down the halls. "There won't be as many reinforcements here, so we should be able to make it to the hangar without too much trouble."
"Takodana?" You echoed confusedly.
"I told him that's where the Resistance base was."
A fluttery feeling blossomed in your chest. He lied to his mentor to protect the Resistance members.
"Thank you."
He gave you a small smile, squeezing your hand. "You're welcome."
After turning a corner, you were met with a cluster of stormtroopers that jumped into action and began blasting at both of you the moment you were spotted.
Seonghwa grabbed you, tugging you around the corner and out of the line of fire.
"Well, this is a problem." You breathed out heavily. "We're outnumbered and you don't have a weapon."
"Yeah. Though we might be able to make it if we make a run for it and do our best to dodge. Their aim is horrible anyway."
"Not if we're close enough to shoot." You pointed out.
While you and Seonghwa were strategizing, the thud of something heavy falling to the floor came from where the stormtroopers were, followed by another thud and another. Preceding each thump was the sound of a blaster of some sort, but it was different than that of a trooper. The rap of footsteps heading your way made you both tense up and prepare to defend yourselves until a familiar face rounded the corner.
"Someone call a rescue team?" Han Solo asked with a grin.
"Han." You let out a mix between a laugh and a sigh of relief. "How did you know we needed help?"
"Seonghwa told us using one of the listening devices you planted."
"You heard me?" He asked, relieved that his call for help didn't fall on deaf ears.
"We were listening the whole time. We had a team of Resistance members monitoring the audio at all times." Han responded. "Now let's get you two outta here."
He beckoned you both forward, bringing you around the corner to find stormtroopers scattered about on the floor, each of them sporting one or more holes in their chests, their armor marred by burn marks.
"You took them all out by yourself?" You asked, stepping over one of the bodies.
"I've had lots of practice, kid." Han responded, moving on down the corridor.
The three of you jogged through the halls, proceeding quickly while sweeping the area. Your escape wasn't an easy one as more stormtroopers came up from the opposite direction, blocking the way.
"Stop right there!" One of them shouted, holding his blaster.
Han Solo pointed his own gun at the group of armor-clad troopers while you activated your lightsaber again. When they saw you were going to put up a fight, an onslaught of red plasma blasts blurred past. You moved in, ducking and dodging shots while taking a swing at the nearest stormtrooper's legs. He shouted in pain and fell to the ground, giving Han an opportunity to take him down while he was vulnerable.
Seonghwa, weaponless, used his Force abilities to push away the troopers that got too close, shoving them into one another. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to stop them.
"Hey, kid!" Han Solo called out to Seonghwa. "Thought you might need this so I brought it just in case." His glossy chrome lightsaber was tossed over. "Found it in Y/n's room."
Seonghwa's eyes widened, looking at you with surprise. You were about to ask Han why he was even in your room to start with, but Seonghwa spoke before you could.
"You kept my lightsaber in your room?"
Your cheeks were set aflame at his question before you shot one back at him without thinking. "Where were you keeping mine, huh?"
Now it was Seonghwa's turn to become flustered, his ears turning red.
Oh.
"Now's not the time for all this." Han spoke gruffly, using his blaster to hit a stormtrooper.
"Sorry." You and Seonghwa spoke in unison, his blue lightsaber activating.
A smile that couldn't be suppressed no matter how hard you tried spread across your face, a wave of nostalgia and joy filling you at the sight of him. It was just like old times.
Seonghwa lunged forward with a shout, you following behind with renewed vigor as you both went at the stormtroopers, knocking their blasters out of their hands and swinging your sabers, slicing through their armor easily. Any troopers you or Seonghwa didn't get were swiftly shot down by Han.
"I think that's all of them." You huffed out.
"Well then let's get out of here before more show up." Han Solo nodded with his head, urging you and Seonghwa forward.
Much to your relief, the three of you made it to the hangar where thankfully no stormtroopers were lingering about. Your feet moved faster, following behind Han to the opening of the hangar, looking around for his ship.
"Where's—"
His loud whistling cut you off as he waved his arm in the air, signaling something out in space. Seconds later, the Millennium Falcon came flying around the back of the First Order vessel.
"Step back." Han ordered as the Falcon eased into the hangar, the loading ramp extending from the bottom. "Come on, come on." He ushered you and Seonghwa up into the ship where you both followed him to the cockpit where Chewie was manning the controls.
Chewbacca stood up so Han could take his place, a joyous noise leaving him when he saw Seonghwa standing there beside you. He was immediately pulled into a big hug by the Wookie who was elated at the long-awaited reunion.
"I missed you too." Seonghwa chuckled, patting Chewbacca's back.
You too were pulled into a tight embrace, laughter bubbling up out of you.
"It's good to see you, big guy." You told Chewie, pulling away.
"Alright everyone, buckle up and hold tight. We're getting the heck outta here." Han Solo said.
Seonghwa's return to Ajan Kloss was a momentous occasion; he was welcomed back with open arms and firm handshakes, but not from Leia. From Leia, he received a suffocatingly tight hug.
"We're happy to have you back." She murmured tearfully, smiling up at Seonghwa. "And thank you for your distress call. Han insisted on being the one to bring you two back."
"Really?" You asked.
"Yes. We were getting a rescue plan together but it wasn't ready to be executed. As soon as we heard the call for help, Han started prepping to leave right away."
"Y/n, you're alive!"
You turned to see Poe walking over with Finn following behind.
"No thanks to you." You teased, giving him a hug.
"Hey now, I came right back here and told everyone you'd been captured." He defended lightheartedly, his eyes drifting to your friend standing beside you. "Ah. You must be Seonghwa! This girl right here talks about you nonstop. I wish I knew where Seonghwa was. I hope Seonghwa comes back. You would've liked Seonghwa. I hope we find—"
"Okay." Finn came up, chuckling awkwardly and grabbing Poe by the shoulders, slowly pulling him away. "That's enough out of you."
To celebrate your rescue and Seonghwa's return, the droids and cooks prepared a massive meal for the camp. The both of you stuck around the tent for a while to chat with Resistance members before deciding to go off somewhere for a little privacy. And that place was atop the Millennium Falcon.
"I missed the food here." You sighed fondly, rubbing your stomach. "The meals I was given on the First Order ship weren't great... no offense."
"None taken." Chuckled Seonghwa. "It was subpar at best. Even when I was a Sith I missed the food here."
You laughed softly, gazing up at the stars like you'd done years ago, seated with your legs crossed. When you turned back, Seonghwa was looking at you and had leaned in closer.
"This is nice." He murmured softly.
"What is?"
"Being up here with you."
Fighting back a smile, you responded. "And why's that?"
"Because I can finally give you a proper kiss."
He leaned in and placed his lips gently on yours, tentatively at first. Your eyelids fluttered shut and you allowed yourself to get lost in the moment now that you were both home and safe. His hand slid around to cup the nape of your neck, guiding you to lie back while his lips slowly danced over yours, making you melt. Once you laid down, he leaned over you and depended the kiss by tilting his head and picking up the pace. A mix between a soft sigh and a hum left you, your hands moving up to run through his long locks.
"I love your hair like this." You murmured against his lips.
"Yeah? You like it longer?"
"I do." You brushed your digits through it, making his eyelids flutter, a low noise leaving him before he dove back in for a passionate kiss that took your breath away. His hand that wasn't cradling the nape of your neck slid down your side to feel your curves through the fabric of your gray tunic.
Your fingers gripped at his inky hair, making him groan against your mouth, sending a flurry of butterflies to your stomach. His pillowy lips captured your bottom one, surrounding it in warmth before he encompassed your mouth wholly with his and making your head spin in the process.
When he pulled away, you were both panting shallowly, looking at each other with half-lidded eyes that were glazed over with adoration and longing for one another. It was a picture perfect moment; you and the man you loved lying under the stars together, reunited at last.
"I love you." Seonghwa murmured reverently, caressing your cheek tenderly with his thumb as you both gazed at one another lovingly.
You smiled softly at him before responding, "I know."
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atlabeth · 5 months
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now that the dust has cleared from the chaos for me irl, i want to officially thank you all for 3000 followers!! because wow. where do i even start?
this isn't a milestone i thought i would ever reach. i made this blog during my junior year of high school when i was bored as hell in online school, not knowing what would come of it, and honestly not expecting anyone to read anything i’ve written. i exclusively wrote avatar fics (kind of embarrassing that a series i started at the beginning of my blog still isnt finished huh?) because it was what i had been watching most recently. i started to gain some recognition, made some friends, and slowly but surely i carved out my little corner of the internet. and now, 3 years, 3000 followers, and almost 500,000 words later, i’m going into my junior year of college with some of the best online friends a girl could ask for (shoutout to my day 1 @simplysolo for still being around and still being the best ever, and shoutout to all my other tumblr friends that have deactivated over the years</3 i miss you guys) a whole array of fandoms that i’ve dabbled in, and a newly discovered thing for middle aged men. cool 
i truly cannot thank you all enough. i’ve always been a writer, but this blog has given me a sorely needed creative outlet and made me more confident in my writing skills than ever. at the end of the day i’m just writing silly little x reader fics, but i’ve truly had so much fun doing it! every single fictional man im in love with is also in love with me isn’t that crazy!!!
a special, extended shoutout to the loveliest mutuals i’ve picked up over the years. i wouldn’t be half the writer i am and i wouldn’t have half as much fun on here without you all. @simplysolo for being around since the beginning and truly being the greatest person on this app, i love you intensely, @sokkadora for being another one of my ogs (we dont talk anymore but i see you every so often on my dash and you’re doing great!!) @mcallmestiles for being one of the first avatar fics i ever read, traitor encouraged me to be a better writer and i hope you’re doing well with your medical career!! @tangledinlove for being my most famous mutual, the kindest person in the world, and being brought together through the power of lockwood, @giyuji and @milkiane who are both inactive but who i have to tag because i love them and i hope they’re doing well; naomi you got me into the grishaverse and liane we were in the trenches of the stranger things revival together, @boneblushed for dealing with so much but still being phenomenal and lovely in every way, @tommymcartney for being so sweet all the time, my biggest cheerleader and encouraging my insanity in every fandom ive been a part of, @nghtwngs for being the only person who loses it over nikolai lantsov as much as i do, to all my new/more recent mutuals @hotchfiles @ma1dita @moowithmidnight @emiliehornby @supercutszns i can't wait to get to know or keep getting to know you!!! you're all so lovely!!! and all the mutuals i don’t talk to as much as i should, i love you all and cherish you in my heart regardless of if we talk every day or have never said a single word to each other!! i don’t want to tag you all because i don’t want to bother you, but if you’re looking at this and thinking am i talking about you, i am. i love you. it takes a village and im so lucky to have you all as mine 
i can’t believe it’s been 3 years, i can’t believe i’m halfway done with college, and i can’t believe we hit 3,000. truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for reading my fics and letting me be some small part of your lives. i can’t wait to write more for you all. keep a lookout for my 3k celebration post! 
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tommyssupercoolblog · 25 days
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Incoming very long ramble about the fragility of internet content and the ways some things are impossible or difficult to preserve
The thing that frustrates me most about poppytwt is how fruitless it all feels.
Like, you can't archive or research poppytwt effectively. You can certainly TRY but you'll find very little!!!
You have people who spent years in the poppytwt fandom who can TELL you about fanfics they read, art they saw, friends they made who were deactivated or doxxed or harassed or who committed suicide or are otherwise lost to time, but they'll have almost nothing to show for it because poppytwt was actively designed to be as impossible to trace back as possible, precisely because people were afraid of harassment.
How are you supposed to find, say, Tommy/Tubbo fanfiction? There's some on the actual tag, sure, especially now that poppytwt is for the most part over and it's considered "okay" to ship them now, but I'll tell you right now there are thousands of fics that won't pop up because the fic had no tags whatsoever, or spelled Tubbo like Tvbb0, or used some God awful emoji combination to convey who they were talking about, or were straight up DELETED. Discord servers moved every few years, fanart and fics were usually tagged with censored bullshit or not tagged at all and then taken down and deleted, entire accounts were ALSO deleted, even assuming something was tagged properly it's probably gone.
Most of us in the fandom at the time didn't think to make archives of anything while it was happening, so we've lost like.... probably enough content to make our own small website full of it, and even more chatrooms.
Almost all of the public facing content left is NSFW and/or more controversial kinks like CNC, watersports, etc, which could be because people who post that content are more resistant to criticism anyway but honestly I don't know why that is, and I know sfw content beyond what you can currently find EXISTED, we consumed tons of it back in the day, but it's almost fucking impossible to find!!! And most of it, when you get your hands on a link, is GONE!!!!
It happens with NSFW content too though, if course. Veradie was one of the most popular artists in poppytwt by far and a lot of the art links don't work. Some have archived versions with working links but a lot is gone because the original post leading to it doesn't work, and Veradie, like, the person, is missing. I'm sure she(?) would know a lot about old fandom and might even have archived some stuff, but if you're some sort of internet historian how in the FUCK are you supposed to find her??? She deactivated without a trace!!!
I made friends with a user called Kencydoo on here and one day I logged on and Kency was just GONE without warning or any indication of where they were moving to, no DMs to people they knew, nothing. I don't even know if it was staff or mass reports or a self-deletion. I do know Kency sometimes posted NSFW dead dove stuff and had tags you could block to avoid it, so it's possible one of those posts blew up and got the blog taken down, but I have no level of certainty.
Reese (I think it was Reese?) had people hunting for a "main account" that didn't exist for harassment and doxxing purposes and then ALMOST left (I'm glad you're still here @reesesrambles )
There's no stability for poppytwt content and no real shelf life which means that most of the history and even the harassment that REQUIRED THE EXISTENCE of a seperate fandom is gone. We can describe what the old dsmp fandom was like and why poppytwt exists and what it means but most of the actual concrete fandom blogs or resources are GONE, absolutely obliterated.
Like you can't make a Strange Æons style video about poppytwt, you literally can't, because almost all of it is like the fucking city of Atlantis. There WAS stuff here, but it was constantly sinking.
Most people I know for a fact were involved in poppy honestly just left for the hermitcraft fandom because people over there are like...normal?? The hermitcraft fandom allows RPF and doesn't give a shit about shipping characters who are "sibling coded" or whatever the fuck. They understand the concept of just not clicking on something you don't want to see, instead of launching a twitter cancellation campaign against people. So like if you can talk about a similar, and GOOD source of content that is also actively ongoing and not get shit for it, why would you chose to create for a discontinued peice of content and/or streamers who you WILL get shit on for writing about?? Like if your options are "write grian RPF and be able to not stress and have a fun time" or "write tommyinnit RPF and delete hate comments every day and watch your back constantly" why the fuck would you pick the latter???
And it's frustrating because the fact everything disappears means it feels like you don't even have much to look back on. The friends you made or content you enjoyed about a series you love is all dust now, and if you were into the DSMP for a long time (and therefore in poppytwt for a long time) then it's so much worse. It all adds up.
Anyways that's my ramble on how fucked up it is that entire communities can be lost in an era where things can supposedly be maintained forever does anyone want to drink a caprisun with me
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The Heartbreak Prince (Prequel)
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Pairings - Rooster x OG Desi Character Nisha Bagchi
Warnings: Major Spoilers for Top Gun (1986) and Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
A/N - For all the girlies asking for a Desi! Reader fic, here it is! This is my first time writing with an original character, this may or may not turn into a series or will be a looong one shot (I can’t decide upon it). This starts just after The Wedding Bet Date Top Gun AU, I will make a separate master list for this universe with all the stories of my Top Gun AU set in this. This is a prequel, full fic will be out this week :) Hope y’all like it.
This was requested Anonymously, whoever you are, thank you!
My Main Masterlist || Send your requests here!
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Living in an oceanfront house with his 15-year-old stepsister who would not listen to him was not on Bradley’s bucket list.
When Maverick and Penny left for their honeymoon after their wedding, they were planning on letting Amelia stay at her friend’s house for the duration of their trip. But after the stunt she pulled at Penny’s Bachelorette, they were paranoid to do so.
Also, the fact that she is a literal carbon copy of her mother, who was infamous for pulling stunts in her youth didn’t help them either.
Penny and Pete practically begged Bradley to keep an eye on Amelia, living at Penny’s home until they return.
Bradley would see his friends and colleagues fight their siblings to death and love them more than themselves. He always thought of it as a peculiar bond between two people. He had lived alone for a long time. It was difficult to fit in with a person who does nothing but talk about pop culture and how tragic Anakin and Padme’s story was. 
Amelia seems like an absolute angel, and she was slowly growing on him. But, she was the sneakiest teenager he had ever come across.
He had his fair share of fun in his teens, but he was never that sneaky. So after he was about to ground her for trying to sneak out yet another time, she gave him the most adorable puppy eyes. He had to agree to a movie night instead.
And here he was now, running around the small naval town trying to find a specific type of popcorn and chips she listed for him.
The small store wasn’t crowded a lot but was still busy on a Saturday night. He roamed around the aisles, his eyes searching the stacks of food as he subconsciously muttered, “Cheddar Cheese” under his breath. He was so lost in doing so, he totally missed the figure coming towards him, and bumped into a shopping cart.
“Whoa!” he stepped back, trying to regain his balance, as he heard a string of apologies thrown towards him.
“Oh my god! I am so sorry! Are you okay?” a familiar voice followed.
Bradley looked at the cart that hit him in the ankle, and then at the person holding it.
Eyes as dark as his stared back at him, the same eyes he'd stared into so many times before. She had shorter hair now, reaching just above her elbows, and apart from her absence of glasses, she looked exactly the same.
He took a sharp breath. “Nisha?” he whispers, desperately trying to believe his eyes.
“It’s been a while, sunny.” she smiles.
Chapter One
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Prequel to this series (Hangman X Phoenix) || The Wedding Bet Date
A/N - Thank you everyone for sticking with me till the end of this fic! if you liked it please let me know through the asks and the comments. Any and all requests, headcanons, and drabble requests about this AU is mostly welcome. Love y'all, Take Care!
Requests are open! Feel free to request anything.
Tag List:
@tuiccim  @parkjammys  @akinrawsx  @asteph22  @iamthebeth  @thefandomqueenuno  @onlyhereforthefics @yikesdameron  @savedfanfics1992  @amigaytho @hoennsficrecs @samwilson-mylove  @xbuchananbarnes-deactivated @jenniweaslee @anna-phora @fluffyprettykitty @ladiesluver
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geryuthespacesquid · 1 year
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Okay okay I'm having too many thoughts on tears to contain them I'mma put something here Spoilersssss
If I'm being quite honest I keep seeing posts saying this game is better than BoTW entirely and I simply cannot agree I think they're genuinely about the same for a number of reasons.
BEAR IN MIND: I have completed the Rito and Zora areas, but unfortunately I have not been able to find any of the dragon tear memories or whatever they're called, I have been looking but i have no damn clue.
I will say that I think Tears of the Kingdom has better characters overall but I do think there is some flimsiness that comes with having so many npcs to focus on that was also present in BoTW and that's why the vast majority of BoTW character personalities are pretty severely headcanoned or flanderized in fan media, I feel like the same thing is gonna happen for tears. On that note, I also think that it's a good thing that the old sages are pretty hazy. The dialogue the old water and wind sages had was pretty fuckin similar, if not identical, and their personalities don't show much, and in some capacity I think that's smart. The greatest folly of BoTW imo was making the most compelling characters the dead or inactive ones, it's why I say AoC was a better story than BoTW, because it uses all the best characters to the fullest extent, and takes the ones that weren't as strong and lifts them up. Because of that, I think it was smart to not make the dead characters as lively again, because now people won't get hung up over them again.
But, on that note, I think that it genuinely makes them pretty unnecessary. I feel like there would've been better mileage just making Rauru narrate that and tell the new sages what their ancestors did so we have one super strong character compared to a few ones that feel a bit unnecessary. And while Rauru is only going to get stronger, probably, I think it could be cool to just have him mirror Link a bit and remember and lament his friends some.
So far, these stories feel very identical, it's just a With Friends sort of deal that I like mechanically and think is being played very well, I just also think that pretending these two stories are super different is a little far fetched. The new sages have more potency because you work with them for the whole dungeon and boss, which I love, it gives them more energy and supports their personalities a lot more, and does more to convey the idea that yes, Hyrule was attempting to move on from the champions by no longer having the mindset that only a champion can save them. The new guys are here to help, and they're not abandoning their fate to one guy anymore. BUT, in my mind that feels like a retooling of BoTW's story to better convey a point that didn't land right in BoTW.
Gameplay, I have nothing to say or complain about. It's the most flawless part of this game, they took botw and made it better in basically every way. If I had to say something, I do miss premade elemental arrows, because pressing up on the D-pad every time is such a time waster that I just forget half the time. Also these monsters are fuckin spooky and I hate it. /pos
Finally, the world. I won't say that I'm happy with, or understand why none of the shiekah tech is anywhere anymore. I get it, with the new shrines and towers, it'd be so much shit just all over, but it's still hard to believe that all vanished and just deactivated, especially because there's really no reason to have new towers, but of course, that's for a gameplay feature rather than a lore feature, so I suppose that's a moot point. What really gets me about this fuckin world is HOLY SHIT WHY IS THERE SO MUCH TO DO. I cannot focus at all and that's both a benefit and a detriment to me because botw let me laser focus on things which is good for my easily distractable mind and I've yet to hear one person say otherwise on the idea that there's too much to focus on. It's never a negative thing when mentioned by folks, and I don't think it is, but FUCK I need an alternate game mode that just hides like 70% of the quests until you complete some because having these all accessible means I will never finish this main story.
Also, fuck the depths. That's it, fuck the depths.
I like this game. It's just kinda weird, something is preventing me from loving it, and I hope that resolves by the end because I really would like to love it, and say it's better than botw, but as far as I'm concerned I don't think I have a severe preference for either one.
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dark-muse-iris · 2 years
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Also, the dreaded "There's still time!" When it comes to children 😒 There's also plenty of time for these people to mind their fuckin business but they can't do that when it comes to AFAB's bodies. I can personally thank you for me even having the idea that one can be childfree and happy, because beforehand not having kids wasn't even a thought, it was just a "it'll happen when it'll happen" and now I never ever want it to happen 😂 mainly the only reason I use FB anymore is for memes, my kinky bdsm groups, weed groups and childfree groups which is so much better than dealing with my family and high school level drama of old friends. So while I do believe there are internet communities that do nuture interests and are healthy, they are indeed far and few inbetween.
Here's to hoping that your new team is the sort of people that listen and appreciate you and your input/what you offer to your field.
Are there any newer groups or solo artists that have caught your attention recently? I mostly cycle through the playlists that Spotify recommends, which does offer some variety and lately I am seeing more Dreamcatcher on there (finally some more recognition for those beautiful and talented ladies) but I always love seeing what other people are listening to right now.
FB has been deactivated for me for a long while. I got tired of people back home shouting Bible verses online like the rest of us weren’t obeying hard enough. There’s a lot I could say about those communities and their bullshit of late, but I’ll spare the blog. In any case, I’ve had to take some very extreme countermeasures to protect myself and my friends/family thanks to churchgoers in my area not minding their business. And that’s taken a lot of my free time I otherwise would have spent writing stories.
My online community time has mostly be scattered among different interests on Twitter where there was more interaction until recently. I’m in a handful of Discord communities too, but only on a part-time basis because they’re very much like group chats where drama can escalate quickly. I’d like to be more active here but so many people have left, I’m not sure which direction to go. “If I posted writings again, would anyone give a shit?” is a question I’ve grappled with a lot. Writing can be fun and easy, but sharing that writing involves more upkeep and steps and I’m not sure the trade-off would be worth it, if that makes sense.
I miss having people to talk to about k-pop. Most of my k-pop friends are only talking about their personal crises now, or other interests/milestones I may not share, so I shifted my focus with most of them and stayed thankful I still have most of my friends to begin with. I haven’t been super engrossed in 4th gen music lately because I’ve been listening to a lot of old rock from my goth teen years to get through work lollll BUT I really like NewJeans! I’ve played a lot of their songs on repeat because they had sounds that I remember (and sorely missed) from late 90s/early 2000s R&B in the U.S. That’s a really specific reason to enjoy a group, but I told every k-pop stan I knew over age 30 about Attention when it first came out.
Other than that, I’m planning a year-end stages binge alone on my couch soon. I’ll probably be drunk for that and missing my old friends who won’t be there to wheeze with me in person. With any luck, I’ll get a few notes for some stories or forget the year I’ve had for a few hours of bliss.
Nice hearing from you again! I hope you have a wonderful new year!
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hoyeonnies · 1 month
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This is what I sent to ryunnies days ago when they first started running their mouth and I’m also not trying to defend the fio mun/muse but I have spoken with people I knew were connected to all the drama and have learned they not only apologized (and make sure to always reiterate that apology) for what happened but there’s also never been another incident in well over a year with that mun or muse. And I also learned who some of the other muns involved in that drama were and they are very problematic in every group I’ve encountered them in and are prone to lie on people to deflect blame and keep themselves looking innocent so they can continue in their toxic ways. I myself fell victim to one of them where they took my muse under their wing so to speak at first when I had a rocky start getting replies and the such and then suddenly they started attacking everything my character said and later I found out was talking horrifically about not only my character but also myself to people and found out they stopped talking to my muse because other people finally started acknowledging my muse and it was more than their muse got and they started saying vile things both ic and ooc in an attempt to get everyone to drop my muse and once a lot of people actually did they popped up again like “omg sorry i started being so bad at DMs i miss u!!!!” I know you said you had someone else say the mun and muse being discussed is problematic but i have spoken to people actually confirmed to be involved in what happened and it’s far from the truth and i myself have seen how the mun and muse both act from my own experiences with them and its gross how they are being portrayed and its also horrible that someone is now attacking their ship partners both mun and muse as well. People can make mistakes in life, it all depends on if you can learn and grow from those mistakes and if you are able to hold yourself accountable and make amends to those you have hurt. The mun in question has but i promise you “sea” and their friends that are clearly the anons attacking the mun/muse/group (if not just “sea” themselves sending them in to further deflect) never have in any of my experience being in the same spaces as them. They all actually laugh it up when they cause people to completely deactivate accounts, people who didn’t deserve any of it ic or ooc. Anyways, here’s the message i sent, I just wanted to add that little new addition after i saw your first response! Thank you for allowing me a place to get this out, it’s been making me ill seeing everything going on.
to ryunnies:
If you really were the Ellie mun at Fio, I think you need to take a long hard look in the mirror before trying to talk about ANYONE. You, your character and your weird little clique made not only the timeline one of the most uncomfortable places to be but just the group in general. I was there at the same time you were and the things you would do and say were so bad that to this day people still worry when a Felix applies that it might be you coming back. Both ic and ooc you did many intolerable things but would act the victim all of the time. I had Ellie come to my character about someone Ellie would be so friendly to on the tl (but shade horrifically at the same time) and say all types of terrible things about that character and I learned after I wasn’t the only one being told to not interact and it was all clearly some made up bs once investigated but you just wanted to be a Regina behind people’s backs. And I’ve seen proof of interactions both IC and OOC that it wasn’t just that one you would do it to but multiple characters that Ellie called friends. You and your friends also infantilized grown people non stop and made EVERYONE uncomfortable and would take it as an attack if spoken to about it. I can’t speak on any alleged issues you had with Eli or the mun but after seeing the way you and Ellie both cut down an innocent character for whatever deluded reason you made up and knowing how beloved a character Eli is there, I’m very much on the side of a lot of your problems are not only self created but one sided. If you’re over it, be over it. Don’t sit around throwing shade on people be it ic or ooc. Grow up.
Also I was also in Saddle at the same time as you and you were definitely weird and causing problems and uncomfortableness there as well and the whole lot of you were eventually asked to leave. The call is coming from inside the house when it comes to trying to manipulate and gaslight ic and ooc I fear.
i hate being nosy as fuck cos why did i read all this please 😭 one thing though, i was tols about eli and their problematic behavior like recently idk 5 to 6 months and i dontwanna be a bitch but i doubt they changed esp if it's true that whatever they do seems to be ignored by the admins or whatever but im gonna jusg give this whole thing the benefit of the doubt maybe????? also sea playing the felix in fio (if i read that right) makes sense why they grouped with the felix weirdo from saddle and their friends.... way to completely ruin the whole group and make things uncomfortable for everyone indeed
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iriemorning · 5 months
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nicks and flicks
i've been called many names all throughout my life. the first of them was from my dad himself, the one who made my first name—irish, from the infamous soap irish spring, then they combined it to my birth month. though i mostly stuck to the former. it's only one word, simple and short. gender neutral too, since i had a boy classmate in kinder who also bore the same name.
it was also very befitting of the things i have grown to like with its connections to ireland and they're like, the green country. i never realized my silent fascination to this color brewing all over the years until the pandemic hit—when we all got stuck in the premise of our homes and that means practically saying bye to our yearly tradition of visiting the mountains. or seeing the nature in particular, except from the screens. that's when my love for green grew, in all its shades, forms and hues.
so, yes, being called irish is the pillar of my whole being. though it's also the most formal one. when i hear that, there's an invisible wall between you and me (dont take it to heart, sometimes a certain distance in between is good)
but when i get called by one of my nicks, it always tugs my heartstrings a certain way; gets me transported back to a particular point in my life in a split second...
ayit takes me back to my hometown, when i was my grandma and grandpa's first grandchild, and all my aunts and uncles were all doting on me. it felt really good, being treated as the only child and youngest in the hood. i was very small, and they all took care of sending me to kindergarten in the mornings, making me sleep in the afternoons even though i wanna watch cartoons, then my dad tying my hair to a ponytail at the evenings to meet my mom in the mall after she came home from work. the very small ayit was carried and passed on to several backs and shoulders until she could walk and climb the mountains on her own.
ayreng takes me back to my elementary and junior high school days; when my parents, siblings and i moved to another town where i met my childhood and lifelong friends. i played hard in the streets, ran fast with all my might and scratched my knees. to this day i still carry those scars with pride. it was also when i started to discover my hobbies and identity by getting into reading groups and writing scripts and news articles in the campus. she joined math and english quiz bees and journalism events and even made it to the student council miraculously. she's all over the place. (wish i have the same energy to do all that now) ayreng was also dubbed as 'miss author' by her batchmates, and after all this time i am still her biggest fan.
rish doesn't take me to a place, but it was something my closest circle have adopted to call me naturally. it sounds the most endearing of them all, and my most favorite. not only my best friends, but when some of my high school classmates approach me with this and they ask or request something of me, like inquiring about an assignment, i always soften up. how could i not melt with such a cute rishhhh in your message?
iris. oh dear. my online fangirl persona that was birthed in 2020. she's like a whole different person. so nice and cute, debuting with baby pink layouts and befriending the whole fandom. the attention was exhausting so it only took a few months before i deactivated the public account in the same year. but the closest friends i made along the way were still my mutuals in a more private account where i still fangirl accordingly, without worrying about likes and retweets and hostile reactions from the public. over the years, iris learned to be more comfortable and at peace in her digital footprint, while still having the freedom to support the idols that changed her life.
and now i'm here, with a new name that took years for me to create. it started all the way back to my ayreng days, when i was having all these ideas for different books. all famous authors have catchy names that also fit their style. so i made up potential usernames that perfectly encapsulate me not just as a writer, but as a whole being. so i went back home—to irish. it's like giving birth. from there, irie was born.
and upon further google inspection (circa September 2023):
Irie is a gender-neutral name of Jamaican origin. It derives from the Jamaican patois term meaning “cool, good, nice,” as in “Everything irie?” The word may also refer to a state of harmony and peace.
“Irie” is a Jamaican slang term that originated in the Rastafari movement. It's used to describe a feeling of peace, harmony, and positive vibes. When you're “irie,” you're feeling good, happy, and content with your life. It's a state of mind that's often associated with reggae music and Rastafarian culture.
and thats when im like, this is it. im sure of it. i finally found the name that will kickstart my writer persona. like a stage name of some sorts, but still undeniably screams like me.
good morning. irie morning.
from now on, i hope that whenever you see my name, it'll always remind you to have a good day.
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icarusthefoolish · 1 year
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^^)/
hello
m just here to converse :)
also i saw your post about looking at your old posts and MAN do i get that (as much as i can since i deleted my old blog), i remember when my notifs used to be crazyy, now the most notifs i get are from bots
tumblr feels less active for some reason :/
anyways, hru? anything new? interesting? not that interesting but still of note to you?
Not gonna lie i was a tiny bit confused who you were for a sec hahah.
I'm doing ok? I mean nothing really interesting is happening in my life currently other then that my sister is moving away next week and that I'm starting school in September haha.
And yea i get that, my notifications never went crazy because me and my friends mostly talked via private messages but i just got nostalgic because I've lost so many good friends due to them either deleting their blogs, moving on from Tumblr or switching Blogs.
As an example i had a really good friend Called Finn, i figured out Finn deactivated their blog and that made me sad.
Like hell I'm even missing interacting with my toxic ex because it was more interaction than i have now you know?
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Con Man's Daughter
Posting this because there isn't enough biodad! John Constantine content.
[Masterlist]
(Part 2)
-----
I feel like this should be a Damianette story or just platonic relationship after Jon got aged-up to seventeen and Damian wanted a friend his age but doesn’t want to admit it.
So basically there is this big bad in Gotham using magic that Batman was fighting at the time and enlisted John Constantine to help out.
John realizes that the villain is using a Miraculous.
“Oh. I think I know how he gets his powers. And lucky for you, Bats, I know an expert on this special brand of magic.”
And he did the smart thing and called up Marinette who at the time was already Guardian and was looking for other lost Miraculouses like in the Treasure Hunter AU I wrote.
He calls her at a really bad time. She was in the process of being chased by the guardians of the place. Monsters and evil spirits.
“Hello, Dad. What do you need and can you do it quickly?”
“Hey, sweetheart, it’s me. How is my little cupcake up to these days?”
“You called at a bad time.” Gunshots.
“WAS THAT A GUN I HEARD? WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU, YOUNG LADY?!”
“Somewhere in Japan. Getting a Miraculous. And why can’t you call me to check in on me and not ask me to help you with whatever mess you got yourself into.” More gunshots sounds and it was telling that Marinette was using a gun.
“Where did you get a gun? And don’t you have school?”
“It’s summer break. Don’t worry Maman and Papa know. Well, the fact that I am in Japan anyways.” Marinette sounded a little out of breath. Roaring and horrifying sounds at the other end. “Can we do this later?”
“As it happens, there is a villain going around Gotham with what I think is a Miraculous.”
Swears on the other end.
“Oi. Watch your fucking language, young lady.”
“How about a No and move the fuck back, old man. I am coming over right now.”
“Old man? I am not that old-” as a magic blue portal opens up in the Bat Cave.
And a red Chinese dragon comes out with someone riding it.
Its rider was a black-haired girl. She had a trench coat similar to Constantine's. I imagine her with a fedora. Like Carmen Sandiego style but not red. Sometimes red but only when she has to steal it from a museum or high security places and she leaves a name card with the name Carmen Sandiego. A sword strapped to her back and a dagger to her thigh.
She had a gun in her hand which she used to shoot the monsters as it was halfway through the portal and yelled out the spell to close it.
“Brilliant entrance but you are in lots of trouble, little lady. What were you thinking about going to another country unsupervised? And isn’t there still a butterfly problem in Paris?”
“One, I wasn’t unsupervised. I had Tikki, a billion years old being and a sort of god. Two.Well, it got boring trying to track Hawk-bitch down. And I found this legend about a guy with a Miraculous who disappeared in the temple and thought hey, more miraculous could mean another edge to defeating Moth-man.”
More bickering and John grounding Marinette who was acting very nonchalant about it.
Okay, at this point, I should say that Batman and Robin are in the background trying to make some sense.
Batman is surprised to find out that Constantine has a daughter who is also involved in magic like her Father but an apparently more specialised kind called the Miraculous. He is a little miffed that he didn’t know about John having a daughter. He did consider it weird at first that she had a slight french accent unlike her father’s Liverpool accent although she pronounced some words like he does.
He also connected some dots that she is also the Parisian heroine, Lady Rouge who Wonder Woman introduced to the League a while back and had declined to join the Young Justice or Teen Titans until everything in Paris was resolved.
Damian on the other hand was suspicious of the new arrival and came to the same conclusion as his father about the daughter thing.
Batman after a few minutes, clears his throat.
The Constantines stop arguing.
“Bonjour. Batman. Robin. Pleasure to meet you. I am Mari Constantine and yes, I am this homeless looking man’s brilliant daughter.” “Hey”
“Well, Mari. Your father thinks you can help us with this new criminal turning Gotham upside down. Literally in some cases. He said that you might be able to help us.” Batman said as he pulled up zoomed in picture of the Miraculous.
Mari looks through the Miraculous grimoire and tells them all about it and power-ups, basically the most effective thing to defeat the guy is to get the Miraculous off them. Plus a spell that would make the Miraculous ineffective if casted within a certain radius of it.
“Thank you for the information, Mari. Constantine, let’s go.”
Mari made to follow them.
“You young lady are grounded and staying here.”
“I don’t need another supervillain using the Miraculous which are my responsibility as Guardian to retrieve them for their own misuse and wreaking havoc on the city. And what if there is an akuma in Paris? I can’t go there if I am grounded in the Batcave although it is a cool place to hang out.”
“You can portal back to Paris but you are not going to follow me. Understood?”
“yes. crystal”
“Good. After me and Batsy get the Miraculous, you can do your Guardian duties.”
Damian snickers. Until Batman cut his mood short, “You are staying behind too. Robin.”
“But Father, why? I am much more capable than Constantine.”
“Hey!” Both father and daughter.
Damian is staying behind too because of the Miraculous power or other reasons and keeps an eye on Mari.
Damian stays behind and there were some protests about mari mad about having a babysitter and Damian doesn’t want to be a babysitter. Despite the two of them being around the same age.
“I got an eye on you so no funny business.”
“Okay, Dad, I am not going to have sex with Robin.” Mari said with a shit- eating grin. Robin definitely didn’t blush.
“I hate you sometimes.”
“I love you too, Dad. Go save the world. Byee.”
John eyes her suspiciously because she is not one to give up that easily usually.
He casts a spell to watch her as they leave. and which she totally knew about.
“So...I have one question.”
“Tt, ask and don’t bother me anymore.”
“Is Batman Bruce Wayne?”
Damian looks up, totally caught off guard.
“I am going to take that as a yes.”
Puts sword at her neck. “How did you find out?!”
“Opened up Google Maps and saw that we are under Wayne Manor. Connected the dots. Also I already knew when Dad made a bet with me once to find out Batman’s secret identity but he never did confirm it for me. And can you please not tell your father about this? I don’t feel like being interrogated by the Bat in the future yet.”
“Father must know about this.”
“I saw you looking at Scarlet here. An animal lover then? You can give her some belly rubs. She deserves it after helping me outrun those monsters.”
His silence was brought. To pet a dragon.
One thing after another and he ends up bringing out his pets-Jerry the turkey, Goliath the dragon-bat, Titus- and her introducing him to her other pets like a hellhound, griffin and other mythical creatures who mostly roam free but come to her when she calls for them and also the kwamis, at least the ones who came with her.
After 30 mins have passed, “So Robin how do you feel about disobeying our fathers?”
“I am in.”
“Depends. Are we going after the (villain's name) ?”
“Yes.”
Awesome montage of them getting rid of the spell John casted and flying out of the Batcave on their respective giant flying pets to the villain’s base.
Meanwhile, their fathers are not doing so well and are trapped in a death trap. John can’t say the spell because the villain made him unable to talk.
“At least, the kids are staying put.”
Cut to Damian and Mari jumping off their pets and onto the roof. Taking out the guards posted there and going into the building all sneakily and also taking out the guards that come their way.
They dropped into the room where their fathers and the villain is.
“Why am I not surprised?”
Villain starts an evil monologue about his mastermind plan to which Damian cuts it short by trying to cut him down with his katana. Mari goes to deactivate the death trap.
They are evenly matched with Damian’s training and the Miraculous.
Mari steps in as Damian was about to be killed. Taps on the shoulder of the villain and when he turns around, gives an awesome right hook that knocks him out.
Takes away the Miraculous and curses him. Wiped the dude’s memories of it.
“When I said stay in the Batcave, I meant stay behind at the Batcave. What point of being grounded, don’t you understand?”
“You mean, Oh, Mari, light of my life, my wonderful daughter, thank you for saving my ass. You are the best.’ by that, right?”
-----
Mari and Damian exchanged numbers and email addresses.
As she was about to leave the Batcave, “It’s been nice meeting you, Mr. Wayne.” and leaves with a wink.
John ‘ungrounds’ her for the look on Batman’s face.
-----
After this, Marinette and Damian become friends who bitch and vent to each other about their alter egos and various villains of their respective cities. (In codes, just in case) They also share updates about their pets and love of drawings.
They have that type of friendship where they trade favors. Mari calls Damian to Paris sometimes to help out with the akuma of the day and Damian sometimes calls her in when Bruce doesn’t let him go investigate a case so he can sneak out by magical means or as back up for when his brothers were too annoying to deal with.
It’s summer break so no missing school.
John and Bruce are aware of their friendship and some of the shenanigans the pair gets into behind their back.
-----
-----
Right. how this all started...
John and Sabine first met when the latter was still in college somewhere in France. John was tracking down a demonic entity which was targeting Sabine for some reason and she was the next target.
John saved her life and exorcised the demon. There was a heat of the moment thing and they had a one-night stand. There were a few more flings and hook-ups after that night.
And nine months later, Marinette Cheryl Cheng-Constantine was born.
When Sabine first found out, she called John to come over and he thought that it was a call for another hook-up and was very surprised to find out that it was not and that he was going to be a father.
They both like each other but do not want to be in a relationship together so they both remained as friends and John agreed after some strong-arming at the very least to meet his daughter before he goes to do his job. And pay for child support. And help Sabine during her pregnancy.
Pregnant Sabine was someone you don’t want to mess with. And John has never met a demon or anyone scarier than her.
He was at first not into meeting his child and there was a self-pity party he threw himself with how the child was going to live a bad life because he was the dad and how he destroyed every good thing in his life.
That’s why he is going to meet the baby once and leave maybe a letter and the occasional birthday present and stay out of their life. Forever.
The day Marinette was born and it took one look into her eyes for the HellBlazer to fall under the spell and all of his plans to stay out of her life to burn away.
At first, he tried. He really tried but he couldn’t do it.
Lasted 4 months before he came back, wanting to place protection spells on her and sigils around the house to keep away the forces of Heaven and Hell and other entities so they won’t use her against him as a bargaining chip.
Sabine calls him to babysit. He could have refused and Sabine would have easily found a babysitter. He moans and whines about how he is a great mage and not a bloody babysitter. Sabine retorts that it is actually called parenting since he is Marinette’s father. He grumbles but in the end, agrees.
The great John Constantine is wrapped around the little girl’s finger.
He was around for some of Marinette’s firsts. Her first word was “John”.
It made him cry. He wasn’t a good man and he doesn’t deserve someone this precious. His daughter doesn’t deserve someone like him as a father but fate made it that way and what can you do about it.
After an exhausting week of doing the usual and coming back from Hell, he saw that Sabine had sent him a video. It was Marinette taking her first steps.
Chas swears that in all the years that he has known John Constantine he has never seen the man look so happy.
------
When Tom came into the picture, John was there to take care of a toddler Marinette while Tom and Sabine went on dates.
Insert John threatening a much bigger Tom while holding a baby Marinette with wide eyes and hugging a teddy bear with the same coat as John’s. (It was something Sabine brought on a whim and to tease John when he came around.)
Tom is supportive and treats Marinette like his own flesh and blood.
John resolved to leave for good now that Tom would be there to be a father figure for Marinette.
That plan fell into the drain the moment he was going to leave for what was supposed to be the last time before Sabine pulled him back and knocked some sense into him.
His face was a big giveaway. Sabine knows that despite his claims of being a terrible father for Marinette, he was a good one and damnit she was going to make sure that Marinette would get to know her actual father.
Tom later made an awkward talk with John about how he was not going to replace John’s role as Marinette’s father.
Marinette was the flower girl at Tom and Sabine’s wedding. John was there too.
During bedtime, John would read her stories and use his magic to make it come to life. Although he would feel a little drained afterwards, it was worth it to see her smile.
Sometimes he told stories about his tamer adventures. (After cutting out some of the inappropriate bits)
------
When Marinette was about 5 or 6, Sabine was out on an errand and Tom was at home with Mari and helping her with her homework. There was a crash downstairs at the bakery. Tom went down to check it out to find John lying on the ground.
With a weak cough, he said, “Close the door. Close it.” Before losing consciousness
Tom did before a man with pitch black eyes slammed against it.
Thankfully John had installed heavy wards around the bakery when it first opened.
They held against the demon on John’s tail. Tom brought John inside and unsure of what to do, grabbed a rolling pin on the counter.
The man outside started pounding on the glass door and every time his hands touched the door, light glowed outwards, showing the invisible magic barrier around the bakery. Sparks and steams fizzled with every pound.
Despite the reddening and burns of his hands, the not-human didn’t slow down.
“ʝօɦռ....ʏօʊ ӄռօա ȶɦǟȶ ɨȶ'ֆ օռʟʏ ǟ ʍǟȶȶɛʀ օʄ ȶɨʍɛ ɮɛʄօʀɛ ɨ ɮʀɛǟӄ ȶɦʀօʊɢɦ ȶɦɛֆɛ աǟʀɖֆ. օռƈɛ ɨ ɢɛȶ ʏօʊ,” He laughs, the sound sends chills down the large man’s spine, “ȶɦɛʀɛ ǟʀɛ ֆօ ʍǟռʏ ȶɦɨռɢֆ ɨ ɦǟʋɛ քʟǟռռɛɖ ʄօʀ ʏօʊ.”
Tom knew that Marinette’s father was a con man. Come on, Master and Practitioner of the Dark Arts and Occult. But he was a good father nonetheless despite all his flaws and Sabine liked him enough so that was good enough for him.
Before today, magic was just the sleight of hands and use of fancy tools to sell the illusions. Now, with a could-be-a-demon knocking on his door to get to the father of the girl he sees as his daughter, he’s not so sure.
“Tom? Qu'est-ce qui se passe? (What’s going on?)” A little voice came from the stairs, “Dad!” Marinette padded across the floor to the body of her passed out father.
She shook him awake and there were a few soft slaps to the face.
“Dad, what’s happened?”
John mumbles, “Demon…. possessing some rich guy….. Exorcism…. Doesn’t like me very much…Don’t worry...wards going to hold.”
John manages to stand before falling down and Tom catches him before he hits the floor. He has a concussion. Tom turns to Marinette, “Go, Hide and don’t come out until It’s safe.” which she did
Unfortunately, a while later, Sabine returns from her night out and the demon upon seeing Sabine. “ɛӼƈɛʟʟɛռȶ..”
The demon possessed Sabine and the previously possessed dude hit the sidewalk with a thud.
“ɨռȶɛʀɛֆȶɨռɢ....” The voice coming out of Sabine didn’t sound like her mother which scared Marinette a lot. “օքɛռ ȶɦɨֆ ɖօօʀ օʀ,”the demon pulled a knife out of thin air, ,“ȶɦɨֆ ɮօɖʏ ɢɛȶֆ ɨȶ.”
Tom hesitated until the demon put the knife on Sabine’s neck and put enough force for a thin line of blood to be shown.
He opens the door and the demon knocks him out. Stepping over his unconscious body and looking down on it, “ʄօʀ ȶɦǟȶ, ɨ ǟʍ ɢօɨռɢ ȶօ ʟɛȶ ʏօʊ ʟɨʋɛ ʊռȶɨʟ ɨ ǟʍ ɖօռɛ աɨȶɦ ʝօɦռ, օʄ ƈօʊʀֆɛ.” and cackles. The sound was so wrong and unnerving and little Marinette tried very hard for her sobs not to be heard.
Too bad the demon had super hearing. “Come out, my little blossom. Maman is home. Why don’t you come out and give me a hug?”
It sounded so much like her mother and she nearly believed that it was her mother and not some entity in control of her body.
But she knew better from John’s stories of dealing with demons and how they would use the voice of loved ones to lure them out and into a trap. (Definitely not something one should tell as a bedtime story but Marinette was very different and had an unconventional childhood with John Constantine as her father.)
Wait...she got struck with an idea but she wasn’t sure if it would work.
Before she could do anything, the door of the cabinet she was hiding in was opened and she was dragged out.
The demon lifted her a few feet above the ground by the collar of her dress.
It heard Marinette saying something. “աɦǟȶ ǟʀɛ ʏօʊ ֆǟʏɨռɢ ƈɦɨʟɖ, ֆքɛǟӄ ʟօʊɖɛʀ?”
“Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica.” Marinette was now screaming the words at the top of her lungs. She repeated the spell over and over again with fierce determination.
John, being his paranoid self, taught her the spell for an exorcism, just in case. Demons spared no one, not even a girl.
It screamed “NO….” as Sabine’s body contorted in strange angles before a dark shadow seemed to be dragged down into the ground. It made a desperate attempt to possess John before it was pulled away and disappeared. There was no sign that there was a demon attack.
After John woke up, he managed to piece together that his 5-years-old (Sorry 5 and a half) daughter sent a demon back to hell.
He was a very proud dad. (He was a tad worried about the consequences from this event and demons hold one hell of a grudge. He wanted his daughter to live a very safe and happy life. The bakery’s wards also need an upgrade.)
He also got the job of explaining what he actually did to Tom. And lots of reassuring.
Sabine, on one hand, was not happy that Marinette knew how to do magic. That is until John told her that he did it just in case so she can protect herself and later it was agreed that Marinette can learn some Magic spells and charms to better protect herself and when she is older, she can decide if she wants to continue or not.
----
(Part 2)
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nooshywrites · 2 years
Text
so uhh it’s been almost over a month since i posted anything on here and i just wanted to apologize for not posting and leaving randomly. i’m trying my best to keep up with asks / dms / tags / replies and i’m sorry for not responding if you’ve dm’d or tagged me or sent something to my inbox. i just haven’t had the energy or motivation to reply to a lot of stuff lately. there are only certain people i’m actually talking to right now, which makes me feel like a really shitty person because i feel like i’m ignoring people who are trying to check up on me and make sure i’m okay. but thank you so much for the love and support, i genuinely appreciate it. i really miss being on here and interacting with you guys. it’s like 3am here and i’m really sleep deprived but i feel like you deserve an explanation, so i’m going to try my best to say everything best as i can.
so most of you following me know i just made this blog not that long ago because my old one was being attacked by some toxic fans from the creepypasta community and my account was deactivated by tumblr so i came here to continue writing. i posted like three things before deleting everything on my blog because i needed a break for my mental health. after my break i said i’d start posting again, which hasn’t happened.
maybe like a few weeks ago i had a falling out with one of my ‘friends’, who was a creepypasta content creator and one of my first friends on here. they convinced me to write stuff about my rewrites of the Laughing Jack story, but they became very toxic and narcissistic towards me. they insulted me trying to cover it up as helping me, and then tricked me into almost letting them use my rewrites of characters in a story they basically forced me into being okay with it when i wasn’t. they’ve had a big impact on my mental health, along with turning another of my friends against me for the purpose of getting back at me and fucking with my feelings because i left and they can’t walk all over me anymore and they aren’t happy about it. i won’t mention their name in this post because i don’t want to start anything up with them, to be honest i don’t want anything to do with them, but that’s one reason i haven’t been on here much.
i’ve also realized my passion for writing got mixed up with my need for acceptance and attention. i panicked whenever posts flopped and i didn’t get any notifications. i guess i’m just scared of not being wanted, my anxiety and depression and past abuse sort of mixes in with everything and hurts me a lot.
this is cheesy sounding as fuck but like, i feel like i live off your love and support. of course i’m doing this for fun and because it’s what makes me happy, but then i have days when i’m just so attention starved and i don’t have a lot of people to help me with that and so i come here to get the love and attention i desperately crave, and when i have days where i do nothing and receive nothing, it triggers some unhealthy feelings and episodes that hurt my mental progress. i feel like it’s unfair to you guys and that i failed you by not being here and not responding to asks and dms. i’m really sorry to those who have reached out to me. i wanted to respond asap but the days keep going by and i haven’t felt like i can keep up with anything.
so here’s my plan. i’m going to take an actual break for myself. i don’t know how long, maybe a few weeks or a month, to take care of myself and sort out my issues so i can be here and not feel shitty and be able to interact and be with you all like you deserve. because you guys literally deserve the world, especially @glassartpeasants and @immortal-velociraptor for sticking with me through all this. i love you guys so much and i’ll be back soon.
— 💕 Nooshy
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crimsonophelia · 3 years
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Could I get a fluffy and maybe flirty Childe imagine set during his story quest? Instead of the Traveler and Paimon accompanying him, the reader (who works at the Northland Bank as one of Childe’s subordinates) gets slapped with the duty of babysitting Teucer and covering for Childe and his façade as a toy seller in Liyue.
"I must say that your brother is quite cute, sir."
"...I guess it must run in the family."
"Hm? Did you say something, comrade?"
"Oh. Um. Nothing, sir."
Of course, being the perceptive man he is, Childe heard all of what they said. What he ends up doing or saying to the reader? Seeing the magic you’ve worked when anon previously gave you the liberty of it, I leave it entirely up to you. :)
featuring: childe x gn!reader
warnings: a teeny bit suggestive at the end
published: april 27 2021
form: imagine
a/n: i’m gonna be real with you, i was stuck on ar35 for the longest time because i was too cowardly to level up my world so i finally did it today and i jumped from 35 to 41 T_T and now my enemies are stupidly strong. but anyways i just started the childe quest today so im just gonna stick to the part when they’re still in liyue and there’s no fighting wwww
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“teucer, i swear to celestia-” you muttered under your breath, as the little redhead slipped from your grasp yet again, running ahead to go look at some kite vendors. “come back here, kid! otherwise you’re gonna be in a heck of a lot of trouble!” 
earlier in the day, you were out running errands for the bank, under tartaglia’s orders, when you had come across rumors of a ruin guard running amok. figuring you would use your spare time and save some local liyue citizens the trouble of having to deal with the feral robot, you defeated the machine with efficient ease. however, in the vicinity, you discovered a lone child showing great excitement at a deactivated ruin guard, jumping and leaping while calling it “mr. cyclops” with a strange elation. 
you figured the boy was snezhnayan, what with his features and clothing reminiscent of the cold climate of your homeland. but why in the world was he out by a ruin hunter all alone? he kept mentioning his brother, a toy seller in liyue, but you could think of absolutely nobody that fit that description. 
so, out of the goodness of your own heart, you decided to take the little boy-- teucer, he called himself--back to liyue harbor with you, and see if you could find this older brother of his. 
however, once you arrived back in the city, your plans were quickly derailed as the little brat seemed to have the attention span of a fruit fly, and was constantly trying to weasel his way into some other dangerous situation without you knowing. 
“god dammit teucer”, you huffed, trying to keep up with the child. who let children have so much energy? your age must finally be catching up to you, you thought. “how about we go back to northland bank? you might like it there” you thought taking him back to your headquarters would stall the boy for enough time for you to find someone who might know the whereabouts of teucer’s brother. there weren’t too many snezhnayans in liyue--whoever his brother is, he can’t be far.
the little boy looked up at you with his big, blue puppy eyes, but you knew his act by now. “no buts, kid. if you’re lucky, we’ll be able to track down you’re brother there.” he sighed, relenting to your orders and following you back to northland bank.
the two of you climbed up the stairwell leading to the entrance of the bank on the second floor, teucer clearly dejected and pouting like a baby. exhausted, you pushed open the doors that you were so familiar with, and ushered the child inside.
much to your surprise, you see tartaglia talking with ekaterina in the lobby. it had been quite a while since you had seen your superior in person, and the surprise certainly was not unwelcome. sometimes you couldn’t stand the man’s smug attitude, yet there was something in his rogueish charisma that you simple couldnt deny attracted you to him.
teucer also seemed to be excited by this sighting of the red-headed harbinger, the little boy’s eyes lighting up with unbridled excitement.
“brother!”
wait. was tartaglia the older brother teucer had been talking about all along?
childe turned around, distracted by teucer’s voice, and upon seeing the little boy, his eyes lit up—first with surprise, then with confusion.
“teucer? what the heck are you doing here in liyue?”
he left the fatui agent with a befuddled look upon her face, and ran towards the child. teucer jumped up into his brother’s broad arms, and they grasped each other in a tight hug, like they had not seen each other for at least an eternity.
ruffling teucer’s hair, tartaglia softened, with an expression unlike anything you had really seen him wear before. he really must care about his family, you thought to yourself.
“so you’re the older brother this little tyke has been talking nonstop about”, you teased tartaglia, elbowing him in his side. “you know, he’s thrown me for a loop this entire day. i didnt think babysitting was part of the job requirement.”
the red-head chuckled abashedly, scratching his head. “sorry about that, [y/n]. the little guy can’t seem to bear being away from his favorite big brother.”
teucer laughed. he truly looked so happy to be with tartaglia again, which made you wonder what the harbinger was like when not on the job. you had known him to be a ruthless war machine, a hedonistic killer who thrived off of the rush battle and bloodshed gave him. childe could take down a dozen men, twice his size, in a matter of minutes, hardly breaking a sweat. yet seeing him interact with teucer, almost a little mini-sized version of himself, his gentleness and care surprised you. perhaps there was more to the man than you had initially thought.
teucer finally detaching himself from tartaglia, looked up at his brother with those same puppy eyes, now full of admiration. “are you here to sell toys to the liyue children, too?”, the child asked. toys? what toys could he possibly be referring to? you and ekaterina, both, looked at childe with confusion.
tartaglia stuttered for a moment. “oh! uhh— yes! yes i am! i was just talking with the nice lady, ms. ekaterina, on how many toys we can sell to all the children in liyue!” he responded, hardly missing a beat. did teucer not know what childe’s actual occupation was?
“wow! my brother really is the coolest person ever!” teucer leaped up and down, hanging onto tartaglia’s pantlegs. looking at this young, untainted innocence, you begun to understand why childe might try and shield the child from the truth.
childe detached the excitable child from his clothing, and beckoned ekaterina over. “ms. ekaterina, would you do me the grand favor of watching teucer for the rest of the day? i’d hate to burden our friend [y/n] after they have already brought him to liyue from celestia-knows-where.” he turns to teucer, telling him “big brother ajax is going to sell many, many toys now! so you need to behave yourself when i’m gone, okay? miss ekaterina will be watching you, and she’s very nice.” he pinches his brother’s cheek, teasing him lightly, and ushering him away with the fatui agent.
it’s now just you and tartaglia in the bank, as the sun was setting and all the other employees had gone home for the day. you heaved a sigh of relief, glad to be rid of baby-sitting duty, after having to deal with teucer’s antics for several hours now.
“i’m really sorry about all of that. i had no idea he would be coming, as a stowaway, no less.” the man looked at you with genuine gratitude. “i don’t want to imagine what might’ve happened to the little brat if you hadn’t been there.”
you chuckled, not quite used to seeing such sincerity coming from the harbinger. most of the time, you had been accustomed to his charismatic facade that he puts on when he becomes childe, the eleventh and one of the most dangerous members of the fatui harbingers.
“don’t worry, it really was no problem. your brother is certainly a handful, but undeniably adorable”, you said, mindlessly gathering your belongings again as you prepared to head out again. “he takes after his older brother quite a bit, i must say.”
“come again?” childe looked behind him, eyebrow cocked.
“oh— nothing. i didnt say anything”, you muttered. shit. you really need to get better at keeping your mouth shut. you refused to be known as the insolent fool with the puppy-love crush on the goddamn eleventh fatui harbinger.
“oh? that didnt really sound like nothing, my dear [y/n].” he smirked. whenever he called you “my dear”, you knew you were in for major teasing. he was definitely having fun with this. he strode towards you innocently, with that usual swagger of his, that tinted everything he did. his walk, his talk, his appearance all oozed confidence, and it was utterly intoxicating.
tartaglia now looked at you with a glint in his eye, the same look he gave enemies before he was about to utterly obliterate them. it was frightening, yet terribly alluring, and you despised how much you fell for it.
suddenly, you felt your back hit the cold, marble wall. you hadn’t even realized that tartaglia had cornered you against a gold pillar, his mere presence forcing you to unconsciously move away from him as he approached you, calculatedly. a lump growing in your throat, you couldn’t bring yourself to even utter a single word in defense, only feeling your cheeks grow hotter and your legs grow weaker.
tartaglia leaned his arm against the pillar, dangerously close to your head, effectively propping himself up with only you between him. you were far too aware of the space—or rather, the lack thereof—separating the two of you, the man’s hot breath audible in the dead, echoing silence of the golden bank.
tartaglia smirked, bringing his face close to yours. “you flatter me greatly, [y/n].” smirking, his breath grazed against your neck, his stare burning into your flesh. the way your name sounded on his lips made your breath hitched in your throat. too hot, you felt way too hot. it was impossible for a hydro user to make you feel such unbearable heat.
“seems as if your clever words aren’t of any use to you now, hmm?” you could feel the mans lips brushing against your jaw, each touch against you leaving a stinging trail. he brought his free hand to caress your own, fingers clasping yours as if you were made of a delicate porcelain, the finest kind liyue had to offer. slowly, as if dragging out each second as long as he could, tartaglia brought your hand to his lips, and planted a long, slow kiss to the back of your palm.
your eyes widened at the sheer eroticism with which he kissed your hand—an act commonly of etiquette somehow being much more lustful, even debauched when tartaglia did it. all you could feel was where his lips met your hand, the phantom burn it left, the slight string of saliva connecting his lips to your hand as he left it, the dark gaze in his eyes as he looked back up at you, clearly aware of how vulnerable you were in his grasp.
“thank you again, my dear. i hope we can continue to work together in the future.”
a/n: jesus christ this got really horny at the end LMFAO anyways i hope you like it! its kinda long but wtv
271 notes · View notes
m00nchild-02 · 3 years
Text
Miss Mafia | jhs (m)
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pairing: Hoseok x reader, Taehyung x reader (He's just a childhood friend, no love interest)
rating: 18+
word count: 15.5k sorry not sorry :)
genre: mafia au, strangers to lovers, secret agent, you are a mafia boss
summary: It's not easy to be the boss of one of the biggest mafias in South-Korea. And surely not as a woman. When a secret agent got discovered by one of your people and brought to you, you would've never dared to guess he would turn your world upside down in multiple ways.
warnings: praising, big d*ck Hoseok, oral (m receiving), hard sex, dom Hoseok, sub reader, v penetration, no protection (reader has an implant so she can't get pregnant. Make always sure you use protection guys!), also a bit of fluff at the end
music recommendations: - Lacrimosa - Mozart - Symphony no 9 - Beethoven - Moonlight Sonata - Beethoven - more songs on this playlist (youtube)
- https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1yXNkU806Y7EZruvrbl4g9?si=76931ed2ebae4c2c (spotify)
a/n: Again back with a story! I'm sorry for any grammar errors. It is such a big one shot. I'll probably proof read it later so I'm again sorry for any grammar mistakes in this ff! Just ignore it please :')
I was originally thinking of making this a jungkook ff but I eventually ended up making it a J-Hope ff instead. I think he would do a great job as main character here ;) Give it a lot of support and
enjoy reading!
masterlist
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Lacrimosa from Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Such a pleasant song to listen to with a good glass of wine. You take a sip of the dark red liquid as you softly move your head to the music playing through your boxes. This is how you liked to spend your time alone. A good glass of wine in one hand and the remote of your boxes in your other hand putting on some of your favourite classical music. Like Lacrimosa from Mozart or Beethoven's 9th symphony. All great composers with excellent music. You smiled as you felt your body relax after the long stressful day you had today. Your placed your red tinted lips on the glass for another sip of your wine you would never get to taste.
"Miss!"
You let out a deep sigh as you turned around in your chair towards the front of your desk. One of the maids walked inside and bowing at you. You gave her an unpleasant look. "Didn't I told the staff clearly not to come into my study for the rest of the day?" You asked the woman in front of you who kept looking down, probably not daring to look you in the eyes right now. Everyone knew you could be a real furry when you got angry or irritated. You can ask the last butler you had, after dropping a glass of whine on you by accident. It costed him a finger because you accidentally dropped a knife on his hand.
You softened the volume of the music before speaking again. "Tell me what's going on. It better be good if you don't wanna lose your job." You said coldly, don't sparing her a glance as you emptied the bottle into your glass. "I-It's about the issue from last week mam." She said. A bit of fear could be heard in her voice.
"Go on" You said. "They caught him miss." She said. You looked at the girl in front of you and suddenly began to laugh. The girl looked up for the first time, confusion all written over her little face. You turned towards the painting of your father on the right wall of the study and smiled, raising your glass. "See dad? The company is in great hands. I told you I would get him." You turned back towards the girl, that smile/smirk still on your face.
"Tell them to bring him to la grande salle. I'll be there in a minute." You told her. The maid bowed and then left the room closing the door on her way out. " You chuckled as you licked your lips. "Turns out this day is gonna be better than I expected..." You said, turning up the volume of the boxes and taking another sip of your glass of wine.
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A few minutes later and your men walked in dragging a guy with them. His hands and feet tied together, his clothes covered in bloodstains and his hair a complete mess. You leaned forward in you chair as they dropped the man right at your feed. You were currently in your grand salle, how you like to call it, where you handled business of all kinds. From having meetings, recruiting new members till having a talk with bastards like the guy in front of you right now.
"Well, well, well... What do we have here." You said, letting out a small laugh. "Jung Hoseok, isn't it? Secret agent at the National Intelligence Service. They say you're one of the best in your profession. Sad that reputation will end today." You said, leaning back in your chair, snapping your fingers as a sign for the maids to leave the room. Leaving only you, Hoseok and two of your bodyguards. You threw the papers that were in your hand onto the table next to you, the pages falling open on some pictures of Hoseok and his meetings with the NIS.
"I must admit Mister Jung, I'm quite impressed. You have been undercover in my companies for five years. My father always knew there was a spy between us but he never had the chance to catch you." You looked away, staring into the distance as you said your next sentence. "Caught a bullet right through the head. Very tragic." You looked back at the man in front of you. He was still looking down, not saying a word or sparing you a small glance. Was he even still alive? Anyways, you still went on with your little speech. "But times change. After my father's death I took over and look! It's been less than a year and I already caught you."
Suddenly Hoseok started to laugh. You looked at him confused as he slowly tilted his head so you could look at his face for the first time today. His cheeks and upper lip were bruised and a dried stream of blood could be seen under his nose. He looked you right in the eyes. "Took you long enough to figure out it was me." He said. "But congrats. I'm happy you can finally make daddy proud." He mocked, spitting some blood on the white marble floor. His words and actions made your head boil. How dare he speak so lowly about your father. The bodyguards stood read to walk over and beat the shit out of him but you raised your hand stopping them.
You took a deep breath, trying to keep your cool. "Listen here," You said, getting off of your chair, slowly walking around the men on the ground before making a halt behind him and squatting down. You pulled out a blade out of your pocket and held it against his neck as you pulled his head backwards. He let out a painful groan making you smirk. You leaned in closer towards his ear before saying the following words, "You can say anything you want Mister Jung but know the more shit comes out of your mouth the less pleasant your stay at my villa will be before I release your soul from your body, understood?" You said, your mouth dangerously close to his ear.
The man didn't seemed intimidated as he scoffed. "Bring it on Missy. Good luck with keeping me locked here." He said.
You stood back up, a bit overwhelmed by his bold words. You walked towards his front, wanting to see his face. "You got a big mouth for a guy who just has been beaten the hell out of." You said. "Maybe I should just kill you here right now. Makes it a lot easier for the both of us." You said as one of the bodyguards handed you a gun. You loaded it and pointed it towards his head.
He looked you right in the eye as you held the trigger ready to shoot. What surprised you the most was that he was smiling. Why was he smiling? This guy made you so confused. "Not the brag princess but-"
"Don't call me that!" You yelled at him with gritted teeth.
"Ok my lady." He said teasingly. "What I wanted to say is you can't kill me." He looked quite relaxed when he said that.
You scoffed. "What are you talking about? I can kill you wherever I want, whenever I want! Just watch me."
He shook his head. "Sorry to burst that bubble of yours but you can't. You see... I've been undercover for 5 whole years. I know a lot about your company and you." He said, smirking, never looking away from your eyes. "I have been in every building, every city and every warehouse of yours."
"And what's your point?" You asked, getting annoyed of his talking. "To make it short, I have placed bombs and dynamite all over the place. If you kill me you'll never get to know the password and won't be able to deactivate them. So say good bye to your drugs, weapons and men... my lady. Bye, bye money." He said before laughing again.
"And why should I believe you?" You asked. "Busan, the warehouse at Ilgon street, number 45 (a/n: I made the street name up. For people who are wondering.). Look under the floor in the janitor's closet." He said.
You heart raised and your breathing became more rapid as you looked at one of the guards. "Go check if it's true what he's saying." You told him. This couldn't be true. If that bomb was really there then he probably said the truth and there would be more. That would also mean the end of your little mafia life and your source of income. That could never happen, not in a million years. Your family has worked so had for all this and now you're finally almost at the top, yes almost, he would barge in and ruin everything. You couldn't let that happen.
You looked at the guard as he finished the call. "They just found two boxes full of dynamite in the basement under the janitor's closet." The guard confirmed what Hoseok just said. "They say there are timers placed on them. They can only be removed by password, cutting a wire would mean the end." He said.
You brought your hand to your mouth and started to bite at your nails as you paced back and forth. "How much time do we have?" You asked. "7 days, mam." The guard answered.
7 days... You had 7 days to figure out that damn password and get rid of these bombs. But would you really be able to dismantle them on time? "Get Taehyung and put him to work." You told the guard before he disappeared to go get your hacker to fix the job. "You," You said, pointing towards the other guard. Lock Mister Jung up in the basement and make sure he doesn't escape." You said. "You can just call me Hoseok my lady. No need for the formalities." He said, giving you a wink. "Oh, shut up you. You're in no position to talk right now."
He laughed. "Right now I'm in a much better position than you would think love." The man came over to Hoseok and picked him up brutally from the ground. "Good luck with finding the password!" He said, before the doors closed, leaving you all alone in the room. You hoped Taehyung would be able to find it because you weren't in the mood of talking to that asshole again.
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"Have you already found something?"
It had been 3 days since your encounter with Hoseok and him telling you about the bombs. 3 days of your hacker Taehyung trying to find a possible password to deactivate them. "I'm sorry y/n. Still nothing." Taehyung was one of the few people that could call you by your real name. You practically grew up with the boy so of course you got some kind of bound with each other.
Taehyung was typing all sorts of things on his computer while something was loading. "Whoever placed these bombs knows damn well how to use them. I can't crack into the system, nor can I track them or dismantle them without the password." He said. "Who did your father mess with?" He asked, his eyes never leaving the screen. "The secret agents agency of South-Korea." You said softly while biting on your nails again. It was a bad habit you did whenever you got stress.
Taehyung pulled at your hand so you couldn't bite on them anymore. "You should really learn how to stop doing that." He told you, looking at you for the first time after you entered the room.
You sighed. Taehyung was not successful in finding the password, the troops you sent hadn't found a single bomb yet except for the one Hoseok told you about and tracing was also out of the question. You were really losing hope. "Just keep looking." You told Taehyung before leaving him behind in his little room.
You were getting tired of all of this and decided to distract your mind a bit. And what is better then visiting your favourite casino when you are bored and stressed? So you went to your room and dressed up for a night out.
Little did you knew a surprise was waiting for you the other day...
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"Mam! Mam!"
The door of your bedroom opened, a maid running inside out of breath as she stood at your bed, bowing first before waiting for your permission for her to speak again.
You groaned as you heard the woman storming in your room. Your head pounding because of the amount you drank the evening before at the casino. You slowly opened your eyes, hand on your head, holding it because of the pain. You gave the woman an angry look. "Speak" You snapped at her.
"M-Mam, T-The prisoner! He- He-"
"He what?!" You yelled, tired of the stuttering and hesitation in her speech.
She swallowed before talking again. "He escaped..." She said softly but clear enough for you to hear.
"WHAT??!!"
You made your way down the halls of your mansion while you wrapped your bathrobe around your body. While you made your way downstairs a few of your men were running upstairs but halted once they saw you. They stared at you with wide eyes while you stood there furious looking down on them. "I'll ask you once..." You said as you slowly walked down until you were face to face with the head of the guards. "What happened?"
"We were guarding him like you asked and suddenly someone of the kitchen came to bring us food. They said it was a treat for our hard work. After we ate it... We blacked out. When we woke up again the door was open and he was gone." The man said, looking down.
You clenched your teeth and slapped him right in the face. "YOU IDIOTS! How could you let him escape! I asked one thing of you and you couldn't even do that!!" You yelled at all of them. They all looked down like puppies that were being scolded at. "You're all useless!" You said as you made your way further down the stairs. They all bowed at you one by one as you made your way down.
You took a few corners before ending up in front of Taehyung's bedroom. You knocked, not waiting for an answer, and walked in. "Taehyung I need you to check the CCTV footage of last night. That fucking agent escaped." You said pacing around in Taehyung's room while the boy sat up, sleepily rubbing his eyes. "How late is it?" He asked groggily as he looked at you with puffed cheeks, bad hair and small eyes. "It's 8 am." You told him.
He sighed. "Give me a few minutes to wake up and then I'll go check ok?" You nodded. "Ok, I'll give you 15 min. Not more." You said and you walked out.
Like promised, in 15 minutes Taehyung was already sitting behind his desk returning back to the footage of yesterday evening. You saw the images of you walking out of the house, ready to go to the casino. "You can skip past that." You told him. He skipped a bit forward until you told him to stop. "Stop! right there." You said pointing at the screen. A man with a hood and a mask on walked in the shadows towards the back of the house. Taehyung checked one of the camera's at the back and you saw the men slipping in through the back door where the kitchen is. "He must be the one who drugged the food of the guards."
"They were drugged?" He asked and you nodded. "These morons thought they got food because of their hard work." You answered him. "Now go to the footage of the basement." Taehyung did as you said and showed the images of the sleeping men and the hooded man breaking the chain, letting Hoseok out. "He must have informed someone somehow where he was." Taehyung said.
You sighed. "I need that password. I can't dismantle these bombs without him. I don't like to admit it but... I need him. I need Hoseok." Taehyung turned towards you in his seat. So what are you going to do now?
You thought for a second. Indeed, what were you going to do? You knew everyone would fall for Hoseok's tricks all over again. Except for you. You would never fall for his charms, right? "I'll go after him." You then suddenly decided. Taehyung looked at you in shock. "Are you sure?" He asked. "You got men to do the dirty work for you." He stated.
You nodded. "I know but I can't trust them anymore. Those idiots already let him escape once, I can't let them do it a second time." You told him. "Check the CCTV's of the streets and every nearby city. I need to know where he is."
"Sure will." Taehyung said before going to work again.
While Taehyung worked on tracing Hoseok's location you went towards the dining room to grab some breakfast. Because of all this drama this morning you haven't even had the time to get some food into your system. Your stomach was already growling as you sat down at the filled table, set for two. Two? You may ask. Yes two. Today was the day your second hand would come back from his yearly vacation. He was one of the most trusted men into your house.
His name was Marcus and besides being your second hand he was also your dad's best friend. He has always been by his side and helped him in any way possible. After he died Marcus swore loyal to you and said he would do anything in his might to protect you. So the least you could do for him was to treat him as one of your own show him your gratitude.
While you were peacefully enjoying your meal the doors suddenly opened, revealing a man in suit. You smiled at the man immediately recognising him. "Marcus! Welcome back." You welcomed the man as he walked over towards you. He bowed at you before sitting down at the table where you were already seated. "It feels good to be back mam." He said, smiling before taking a look at the breakfast in front of him. "Well this is sure a great come back." He told you Smith amused eyes. "Please, enjoy yourself." You said. "Take whatever you want." You told him. "I'll sure will." He answered before digging in.
"So how was your trip?" You asked him. "Pretty good. Got some time to relax." He said. "How were things going here while I was gone?" He asked you.
You sighed. "It has been an entire rollercoaster. Oh Marcus," You said dramatically. "How happy I am you're back. I have so much to tell you." After you told him everything Marcus looked at you in shock. "You finally caught him?!" He asked surprised and you nodded. "Kind of, but he escaped yesterday evening while I was gone. These idiots can't do anything right around here anymore..."
"Only if I had been here to stop all this, huh?" He said teasingly and you nodded. "You know you're the best." You told him.
You ate and talked for a good hour before Marcus decided to go see his colleges and try to lessen the damage that had already been caused by Hoseok's escape. You really hoped he could do something about all this.
That evening you also went to go see Taehyung again to check on the situation. "You already found his whereabouts?" You asked the man in front of you. He turned his chair around and smiled at you. "Even better." He said licking his lips and clicking on one single button on his keyboard a whole screen popping up full of information. "I know which city he is in, which district and even in which building!" He told you, all proud of himself.
You walked over and stared at the screen with big eyes. "Really?! You are the best Tae!" You said, wrapping your arms around him in a big hug. The man laughed. "Alright, alright! You're welcome Y/n-ie" He said as you let go again.
"God, I could kiss you right now! You bring me so good news right now!" You yelled at him and he laughed. "You're welcome and about the kiss... no thanks." He said, showing off his boxy smile afterwards. "Go find me a plain ticket for the first flight tomorrow and tell Marcus he has the leadership until I'm back. This girl is going to Busan for some business..."
"Yes mam!"
And so the next day you flew all from Seoul to Busan. You took a taxi from the airport to your hotel while checking the info about Hoseok's whereabouts on your tablet. You mailed Taehyung, telling him you had a safe flight and to thank him again for his good work. He would definitely get a raise once you got back. You smiled as you closed your tablet and looked outside as you drove past the chore. "How long until we reach the hotel sir?" You asked the driver. "We're almost there miss! Just a few more minutes." He said. "Good" You answered, opening your window a bit and closing your eyes, enjoying the fresh sea air filling the car.
After a few more minutes you finally arrived at your destination. A five star hotel Taehyung booked for you. You got out of the taxi, payed the driver and walked inside the building as some staff took your bags out of the cab. You walked towards the counter and asked for your room. Of course it was the penthouse. You knew you could trust Taehyung. He always knew what you wanted. Once you got the key you went towards the elevator and went upstairs. You already felt completely drained from the trip towards where you were now.
As you arrived you walked towards the end off the hall and opened the door with your key card. A big smile as you entered the room. "Finally some rest." You said as you stretched your neck and walked towards the bed. But as soon as you walked through the door two men grabbed you by the arms. You tried to scream and break free from their grasp but it was no use. One of them held a cloth against your mouth and nose with some chloroform on it making you stop struggling after a while and falling into a deep slumber.
While you were unconscious the men dragged you outside the room, making sure no one saw you. They took you inside the elevator where someone was already waiting for your arrival. It was the lady from the counter that gave you your room earlier. "Let's move fast. Once you get out of the elevator go immediately towards the right. Go through the last door and that should lead you towards the back of the hotel. The van is waiting there." She said. Once they got you in the van they drove off to who knows where.
A few hours later you woke up with an incredible headache, as a side effect of the chloroform. You groaned as you opened your eyes, white light shining all around you. Once your eyes got adjusted to the light that came from big windows all around you you could also make out some silhouettes. "Our little princess is finally awake." You heard a voice. The voice sounded awfully familiar. But you couldn't put a name on it just yet.
You tried to move your hands but quickly figured out they were bounded behind your back. Same went for your legs. Tied against the legs of a chair. You looked back in front of you and the silhouette stood up from his place and walked closer until it was close enough. It squatted down in front of you and now you were able to identify the person clearly. "Hoseok..?" You said with unbelief.
He smirked at you. "Good morning princess." He said smiling. "Hope you slept well." Then you noticed the pain in your neck, shoulders and lower back. How long had you been tied to this chair for? You asked yourself. "You've been out for a pretty long time." Hoseok answered before you could even ask. "I hope my men weren't too rough on you." He said letting out a chuckle and standing back up to walk back towards his chair. He picked up an envelope from next to him and gave it to the man on his left. "Here, split it between you and the other guy. You did a great job." He told the man before he left the room, leaving only you and Hoseok.
"W-Where am I?" You asked. Your voice still a bit husk. "Is this xxx street? Your hide out here in Busan after you escaped?" You asked making Hoseok only laugh.
"Oh you wish sweetheart. Busan was just a distraction to get that tech guy of yours and your men off of my tail. We're in Ulsan right now." He told you. "I must admit... Your men are good at finding me but remember, I'm always a step ahead." He said. You looked at him and scoffed. "Asshole..." You muttered under your breath. "I heard that." Hoseok answered.
"Good, glad you know." You told him. He sighed and shoved his chair a bit closer before leaning forward, his arms resting on his thighs. "Tss, even bounded to a chair you still are a furry." He said. "Do you know why I brought you here Miss y/n?" You stayed quiet, clenching your teeth. "I brought you here because I got a proposition for you."
You scoffed. "And what may that be? You're gonna turn yourself in to me and let me torture you?" You asked nonchalantly.
He shook his head and hissed. "Aish, such a beautiful face but such a dirty mouth." He said, leaning back again. "You know the Choi clan right?" He asked. You scoffed. "Of course I know the Choi clan. Who doesn't? They're the biggest mafia out here in South-Korea. My father's mafia's greatest enemy."
Hoseok nodded. "Indeed. We've been already trying for years to stop them but without success."
"And what does all this got to do with me?" You asked him, not impressed by his little talk about the Choi's.
"I need your help." He said, a serious gaze on his face. "I need you to tell us everything you know about the Choi clan and help us arrest them. There is no better view over a mafia as the view of a mafia boss itself." You looked aside, out of the window. Now only noticing you were at a house right next to some low cliffs ending at the sea. You laughed. "And what's in that for me? I can help you but you're probably gonna arrest me afterwards anyways. So why should I bother?" You looked back at him.
He nodded, following your path of thinking. "I knew you would say that. Here's the deal. You help us destroy the Choi clan and I guarantee you won't go to prison. It's that simple." He said, standing up and walking around your chair. You wanted to say something but Hoseok was first. "And I know you're gonna refuse but think for a second... You have no where to run y/n." He stood now right behind you. He leaned in closer towards your right ear. "I got bombs all over your places." Then he switched to your left ear. "And I got you, tied to chair here right now. So either you're going to help or I turn you in right now and then you can say bye bye to your little mafia life." He said.
You scoffed. You wanted to protest but you knew he was right. He had you completely in the palm of his hand. There was no escape from him. "I give you three days starting today to decide whether you're in our out. In that time," He said, cutting the rope that was holding your hands together. "You are free to stand and walk wherever you want but," He said, turing towards your front and also cutting through the ropes at your feet. "You don't go off this domain. You'll stay at the house or at least in its presence. I have guards all over this place so don't you dare escape. Cuz things won't end well if you do" He spoke lowly, standing up while you pulled your hands to your chest, rubbing your sour wrists. The skin a deep red colour from where the rope had been a while ago.
You watched as he walked towards the door at the back of the room. "I'll stay here too. Come see me whenever you made your decision. I hope you enjoy your stay here." He turned his head towards you one last time, giving you a big grin before turning back around and walking out of the room leaving you all alone.
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Already one day and one night had past and you still hadn't made your decision. You know going in on Hoseok's decision was your only option so far but you couldn't stop thinking if there maybe was another way. If your men maybe could get you out of here without Hoseok's deal involving. Should you go accept Hoseok's deal? Maybe. Where you stubborn? ... Hell yes. You don't like to lose and give in to others. So this time you also didn't want to just give into him. You couldn't. You were the boss of a big mafia! You shouldn't bow for just anyone.
That day you didn't talk to Hoseok at all. You did see each other sometimes and ate meals together but that would always be in complete silence. You expected Hoseok to annoy you but surprisingly he didn't. After lunch Hoseok left the house for the first time since you were here leaving you all alone. (The bodyguards are still there so dw, you can't escape that easy ;)).
That night when Hoseok came back he was so frustrated. You could see it at his behaviour as you were both eating dinner together at a rather late hour, you must admit. "What's wrong?" You asked. If you had to stay here for a few days you could at least make it a bit less awkward between the two of you.
Hoseok looked up at you. Surprised that you actually started a conversation with him after ignoring his existence in this house for at least 24 hours. "So you haven't lost your voice yet? That's a relief." He joked.
You sighed. "I'm serious Hoseok. What's wrong?" You tried again, trying to be as friendly as possible es hard as it was. He looked at you confused as for why you would care for him. "It's nothing you should concern about." He stated before starting to eat again.
You sighed. "Look, I know we're enemies and We both know we can't stand each other for one bit but... If I need to stay here for the few days ahead I want to make it at least a bit more comfortable for both of us. So..." You swallowed your proud and stubbornness as you said the following lines. "So, if something is wrong then please don't hesitate to come talk to me. I'm here for you ok?" You cringed at stating your own words but this was something you needed to do. Not only to make it more comfortable but also to earn Hoseok's trust. Maybe it could come in handy later on. You never know.
Hoseok nodded at your request. "I will princess." You wanted to snap at him giving you that nickname again but you quickly figured out you better shouldn't. Hoseok knew you were holding yourself in for not going all furry on him and he loved it. He loved making you all worked up and angry. Besides that fact that you were a dangerous mafia boss you were also a very pretty woman. No denying that. And seeing you all worked up and going all furry on him made him feel some kind of things.
"I'm a bit tired." Hoseok stated after a while. "I'll go get some sleep. You should do the same." He said, shoving his chair backwards and getting up from his seat. "And don't forget to think about my proposition Y/n. It's a very good and reasonable deal if you think about it throughly. I hope you can state me your decision tomorrow. But for now, goodnight." He said and then left towards his room.
After you were done eating you also left towards your room to get some good night rest. You sat onto your bed after putting on some sleep wear. You sighed as you thought about your situation. You really felt stuck. You couldn't contact anyone since you didn't have your phone. Hoseok must have hidden it when you were unconscious. your men also haven't been looking for you yet either... Did they even knew in what kind of situation you were right now? Did Tae knew? Would he be worried right now since you haven't texted him yet in these 2 days you've already gone missing?
You let out a deep sigh as questions kept filling your mind. It made you crazy! But suddenly all worries were blown away, out of your mind, as you felt two arms wrap around your frame from behind and two lips placing a delicate kiss onto your neck. Your eyes widened in shock. You quickly looked at your side only to lock eyes with someone you didn't expect.
Hoseok.
He softly smiled at you. "Hey princess." He said, smiling softly. "W-What are you doing here?!" You asked while getting out of the man's grip and standing up from the bed. Why was he here? Why did he touched you like that? Why did he acted so... sweet?
Hoseok tilted his head to the side and looked you up and down, smirking and biting his lip. "Couldn't sleep." He said.
You looked confused at him. He couldn't sleep? So why did he came here then? Out of all places why here? In your room? "So?" You said.
He let out a small chuckle and stood up from the bed, making slow steps forwards, closer to you, making you taking steps backwards until your body hit the wall. No where to run now.
Hoseok placed his hands at both sides of your head, against the wall. "Listen up my lady, I can't sleep and it seems like you can't sleep either, so what do you say about having some fun together hm?" He asked, his eyes scanning your face for some kind of reaction before resting on your perfect shaped lips. God, it drove him wild. Those delicious luscious lips...
You looked at him in shock. Was he really asking what you thought he was asking?! Was he referring to sex? "You tried to slap him in the face but he caught your hand on time and pinned it against the wall making you gasp. You must admit it was kinda hot, seeing his fast reflexes.
He pushed closer against you, one of his legs pushed between yours, his knee against your princess parts, his chest pressed against yours. You swallowed as you looked into his deep brown eyes. You could see they were filled with lust. Completely the opposite of how you both would look at each other a day ago.
God, it made you feel things... That lust filled gaze of him. And his knee, pressed against your core didn't made it any easier. "What will it be love? I don't have all night. I know we're supposed to be enemies but I remember a certain person saying we should get more comfortable around each other and that I was always welcome. Do you still remember that princess?" He asked you and you nodded. You didn't knew what was wrong with you but Hoseok's sudden dominant behaviour got the best of you.
He leaned even more closer towards you, your noses brushing against each other, his lips so close to yours and yet they didn't touch. "What do you want princess? Tell me..." He said, and with those final last words you lost it.
"You" You answered him almost immediately. Without hesitation Hoseok started to kiss you and you surrendered completely to him. You kissed him back and Hoseok let go of your hand that was still pinned against the wall. Your arms fell onto his shoulders. You pulled him closer, deepening the kiss some more, your fingers playing with the locks at the back of his hair. Hoseok bite and sucked at your bottom lip until you finally opened your mouth allowing him inside. Hoseok slipped his tongue inside and started to play with yours. You both moaned into the kiss as it got really steamy and messy. "Fuck Y/n- I didn't knew you could kiss that well." Hoseok stated, breathing heavily between kisses. You smirked. "Had lots of practise in the past i guess." You answered before he guided your leg around his hips, his mouth smashing against yours again in a hot kiss. He slapped your thigh two times, asking you to jump which you gladly did. You wrapped both of your legs around Hoseok's waist, not breaking the kiss as he takes you with him towards the bed.
When he hit the bed frame with his feet he slowly sat down, making you sit on top of his lap. You grinned against him, never breaking the kiss. Soft moans and groans coming out of both of your mouths. Hoseok let go of your lips only to wrap them around your jaw and throat. You moaned, grinding harder against him as he found your sweet spot. "Fuck Hobi-" Without you realising a cute nickname slipped out for the man under you. Hoseok stopped kissing for a while looking up at you. "What- What did you just say?" He asked, already half out of breath from your make-out session.
You blushed as you bite your lip, looking away in embarrassment. Hoseok took a hold of your chin and made you look at him again. "Hey, Look at me while I'm talking. Now answer me princess." He said. "What did you just call me." It sounded more like an order now then a question.
"H-Hobi..." You said quietly. It was quiet for a second. Hoseok just stared at you as he took in your words. Then he suddenly grinned, a soft chuckle leaving his lips. "Cute..." You could hear him whisper under his breath before he pecked your lips. Then he went down again, kissing and napping at your sweet spot. You were sure it was going to leave a bruise later on but right now you didn't mind. Your brain was a haze, your body felt hot and you were so wet down there.
His hands kept roaming your body. From caressing your back to gripping your hips, to grind you more and harder against him, grouping your ass and so on. His hands found their way under you shirt and he pushed it up to get it off of you. You helped him getting it off making him stare at your red laced bra afterwards holding onto your breasts.
He grouped them into his hands, squeezing them softly while you just watched. You knew you shouldn't love all this right now and you knew you surely shouldn't do it with him but you couldn't resist it. And besides, it had been so long since you've had dick. And from what you could feel in his pants right now he got one on the larger size.
You bite your lip as you looked at him getting one breast out of your bra, his thumb caressing over the little but making you whimper. He looked at you, giving you a lazy smirk before he attached his mouth to your breast. He let his tongue roll over your nipple, now and then sucking on it, making them go even harder. His other hand still working on your other breast before he switched sides. Now your left nipple in his mouth and his fingers playing and pinching the other one. While he was busy sucking your tits he unbuckled your bra, making it fall onto your lap. You slept your arms out of the straps and threw it aside.
When you turned your head back towards him his lips met yours again in a quick but deep kiss. "Now love... It has been so long since I've had a woman so close to me. So what would you say of making me feel your mouth, huh? Would you do that for me princess?" He said, his thumb tracing over your bottom lip before slipping onto your mouth. You wrapped your lips around it and started to suck on his finger. It may look strange but it kinda comforted you, making you feel smaller and wanting to submit more to him. Letting him take full control.
You nodded as an answer and smiled, getting his thumb out of your mouth. "Now," he said. "Get on your knees love."
He pulled down his pants and boxers as you sat down on the floor, his dick springing free standing tall and red. He was so ready for you. You licked your lips before kissing his length. Starting at the bottom and making your way towards his already leaking top. When you got at the top you started to take him inside of you, making him groan as you suck on his tip, your tongue rolling over the little slit. "Fuck-, that feels so good princess. Keep going." He said, closing his eyes and putting his hand behind him leaning on his strong arms as he felt his body melt under your touch. After teasing the tip for a while you tried to slowly bob your head up and down, every time when you're going down taking an inch more into your mouth until you couldn't anymore. The part that didn't fit into your mouth you stimulated with your hand, moving it up and down in a steady motion with your head.
Hoseok grasped onto your hair out of pleasure, pulling it softly and getting it out of your face. He wanted to see your face while you pleasured him so well. You were such a good girl for him. So good... He never expected for you to go in on his proposal of having a one night stand for tonight but he loved how turned on you got from him and how submissive you got after you acted like such a brat earlier. He liked to get you worked up and make you go all furry to him but having you now submit to him did something to him. He had been watching you for already so long and now he had you for him alone he couldn't drop the chance and just rushed to your room.
Hoseok felt himself getting close as you went bit faster, your droll already rolling over his dick and towards his balls, your eyes getting teary but you didn't cry. "I'm close baby." He told you. "I'ma cum in your warm little mouth and you're gonna swallow it all. You're my good girl after all, isn't it?" He asked and you nodded.
You loved to be a brat but for some reason hearing Hoseok call you a good girl made you want to please him in all kind of ways. You wanted to be his good girl and his only. You loved his small praises, the cute nicknames he gave you and that irresistible smirk of him whenever you did something he loved or when he had a little plan up in that head of his. In other words he made you go crazy for him.
A few more thrusts and he finally came, tinting the walls of your mouth white. And just like he asked you, you swallowed it all, showing him afterwards. "Good girl. Did so well princess." He praised you again and you smiled up at him as he held your chin, pulling you back up.
He sat you back on his lap and kissed your lips, tasting himself before flipping you over onto your back, on top of the soft mattress. You gasp as he does so.
He grins and hovers over you, ghosting his lips over yours for a while making you hungry for more until he finally kissed you again. He kissed over your jaw and behind your ear. "Princess, I want you to turn around for me." He whispered before biting your ear playfully and getting up so you could turn around for him. You did as he said and turned around now laying on your stomach. He slowly looked you up and down, his hand gliding over your half naked body until he stops at your ass. He helps you out of your pants and panties, throwing them aside. After that he also gets off his remaining clothes before hovering over you again, leaving soft kisses on your shoulders. You whimpered as you felt his hard dick poking your asscheeks. You had been so wet this whole time. Your pussy was craving for some attention.
Hoseok chuckled deeply as he felt you grind against him. "Such a slut for me princess. Your body is just begging me to get touched." He said making you whimper a second time.
But luckily you didn't have to wait long or his full length was already inside you. You moaned as he filled you up so well. "Fuck-" Hoseok breathed out. Because you were already so wet for him he slipped right in and he didn't expected that. But it wasn't like you were to loose. You still felt so tight. It was like your little cunt was just made for him.
He pulled it out before pushing it back in, making you both moan simultaneously this time. You both felt so good. No words to describe it.
When Hoseok started to move for real this time he didn't hold back. He didn't really wait for you to adjust to him (not that you needed to) and started to thrust at an already rapid pace. Moans and groans filled the room as Hoseok was ramming into your pussy like crazy. Right now you felt like you were on cloud nine and on Hoseok's side it was just the same. You both had no thoughts at that moment, the only thing on your minds is how good the other's body felt against your own.
After a short while you felt that familiar knot in your stomach. Meaning you were close. Hoseok could feel it at how tight your pussy became. Sometimes pulsating, driving him crazy. "I-I'm c-close-" You said to him between moans and heavy breaths.
As you told him that he suddenly seemed to stop making your groan and whimper. "Hoseooookkkk-" You were whining, not liking his warm flesh leaving you wet and aching hole. But before anything else he flipped you around and pushed back in. You moaned.
"Want to see your face." He said. "Wanna see how good I make you feel." He stated before slowly starting to trust again, his eyes never leaving your face, taking in every detail, every new expression that took place on that oh so beautiful face. He speed up a bit, seeing your expression change again and hearing your moans getting louder. Like before you ached around him, getting tighter and tighter as that wave of pleasure came back, bringing you close to pure ecstasy. "Cum for me sweetheart." Hoseok said as he felt himself getting close as well.
As like his words were the magic spell your body was waiting to hear you both came undone, Hoseok's mouth devouring yours again, muffling your moans as you came. You both stayed in that position for a while, your lips still attached against each other as Hoseok spilled his load inside of you until his dick softened down again and slipped out. You whimpered at the loss.
Hoseok gave you a last peck on the lips before getting off of you and laying on his back beside you, staring up at the ceiling. "That... Was amazing." He said out of breath. You laughed and nodded. "That was indeed." You answered him. "It has been so long since I had such good sex." You admitted. "Me too, princess. Me too..."
"You're on the pill, right?" Hoseok suddenly asked, turning his head towards you. "Why you asking?" "Well, we didn't use a condom. I hope you don't mind." Hoseok said, blushing a bit and rubbing the back of his neck nervously. How was this the man the one that ever took control over you a while ago?
"I don't take the pill but I got a spiral implanted. So no need to worry about getting me pregnant." You told him. He nodded and then stared back at the ceiling. He suddenly laughed. "What?" You asked turning towards him. He shook his head. "Was just thinking of something.." "Tell me." He played on his side and looked at you. "You know what they say about keep your friends close and your enemies closer?" He asked, a playful smile on his face. "Well I think this way we're definitely keeping our enemies closer." He winked at you and you scoffed, a little smile creeping through.
And that's how you both ended up talked a bit that night until you felt your body getting tired and just fell asleep.
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Opening your eyes the next morning it seems you were the first one awake. You tossed around and laid on your other side facing the still fast asleep man next to you. You smiled as he looked so soft while sleeping. So... harmless. You smiled as you looked at him, admiring his cute, puffy face he made while sleeping. How could anyone want to hurt this man?
You shook your head. Did- Did I just think that?! You asked yourself. Get him out of your head Y/n! He's supposed to be your enemy! You told yourself. But yesterday night was just so... You bite your lip as you thought back about yesterday night. Maybe... Just maybe you could trust this man for once. Maybe it was ok to let go for just a little while.
You thought back about his proposition. You didn't knew if yesterday night was one of his plans to get you to follow him into his idea or not but this morning you finally made your decision. You were gonna take Hoseok's offer. It's not like you had any other plans, right?
Before you knew it the men next to you woke up and when he saw you were awake he smiled, closing his eyes and yawning, stretching his muscular arms. "Morning.." He said softly in his deep morning voice. God, you were such a simp for that voice from now on. "Morning." You answered him. You got a bit shocked as the boy leaned in and softly pecked your lips.
Hoseok looked at your shocked face and let out a small giggle before turning onto his back and looking up at the ceiling taking a deep breath. "Last night was... amazing." He said. You nodded but of course he couldn't see it so you answered him afterwards. "Yeah.." You said softly. "Hoseok?" You asked and he turned his face sideways so he could see you, a soft smile plastered onto his face. "Please call me Hobi." He said. You blushed as you remembered you accidentally calling him that last night.
You gave him a small awkward smile and a soft nod. "H-Hobi?" You tried again. "What is it angel?" He asked. Angel... Well that was a new nickname to add to the list. He hadn't called you angel before. You kinda liked it... Stop it! Stop thinking about it Y/n! You internally sighed. Why did he made you feel like this??
"Y/n?" Hoseok called out your name as he saw you were caught in thoughts all of a sudden. "Huh?" You said as you heard his voice. "Oh.." You looked at him and bite your lip before deciding to be bold and sit a bit up. One hand holding you up and one softly wrapped around Hoseok's naked chest under the blanket. You softly let your fingers glide over the warm skin. "I just wanna say... I'm in." You told him, not really wanna admit it but your heart said it was the only right thing to do and your brain said it was the only option to do.
Hoseok looked at you a bit confused before understanding it. "You're for real?" He asked shocked and you nodded. "I will help you catch the Choi's. I already kinda know how too I think..." You said. You looked up at him and Hoseok was smiling at you. He softly started to pet your head. "You made the right decision. I'm glad you decided to cooperate." You don't know why but hearing Hoseok saying you did well made you feel all giddily and good around him. And on top of that the pats he was giving you... You felt like you were in heaven. You may look and sometimes act like a real bitch, well- actually most of the time-, but somewhere inside there you were just a soft girl.
Hoseok let out a deep breath getting you both out of your silent trance you both seemed to be in. "We should go get some clothes on and then we can discuss further details." He said and you nodded, unwrapping your arm from around him and laying back down so he could get up.
Once you both showered and were fully dressed again you sat together at the table to discuss your plan. "So, you said you had something in mind right?" Hoseok asked and you nodded. "Tell me."
"Well," You started off. "You probably already know Mr Choi has two daughters" Hoseok nodded. "but did you knew he also had a son?" You asked and Hoseok looked at you confused. "We've been through those files multiple times. He had a son. He died 10 years ago." Hoseok said, grabbing the file and showing you.
You smirked and shook your head. "That's the part he made you guys see. The rumour goes that he's still alive." You said and Hoseok looked at you in shock. "How is that possible?"
You grinned. "I don't know either but apparently he is. About this... there is good and bad news. What you wanna hear first?" You asked Hoseok. "Good first." He answered.
"Very well then. The good news is, they guy should be in Korea. Multiple people keep saying he's still here and have seen him. It has also been confirmed with pictures. Now the bad news... We have no idea how he looks like. We have witnesses but no descriptions or clear pics of his face."
"So he could be anyone..." Hoseok said and you nodded. "Exactly." "And what has this son to do with getting the Choi's?" Hoseok suddenly asked.
"Well, get the son and you get to the father! People say they still see each other once a year. You said you couldn't get your hands onto Mr Choi? Well he's your chance." You said.
Hoseok seemed lost in thoughts as he looked at the documents in front of him. "But how are we going to find him?" He asked. "There live thousands of people here in Korea." He stated.
You smirked. "I got the perfect solution for that."
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A few hours of convincing Hoseok and taking a plain back to Seoul and you were standing again at your own house. More specifically, Taehyung's workspace. "So you are sure this guy can find Choi's son?" Hoseok asked you for the already umpteenth time. You sighed. "For the last time Hope, Taehyung is the best. This guy here gets everything done." You said earning a grin from Taehyung himself who was seated at his usual place, behind his computers. "Well, thanks for the compliment Y/n." He said. "And Hoseok, don't worry. I'll find this guy. It's not because you failed that I will." He gave Hoseok a quick wink making him scoff.
How does he even has the audacity. Hoseok thought. "Good luck man." Hoseok said before walking out of the room with you, leaving Taehyung alone to do his job.
"So what do we do in the meanwhile?" Hoseok asked you. "We just relax a bit. There's not much we can do anyways." You told him. And before you knew it you had let him to your bedroom. (Not for what you think you pervs out there.😏 It's not always about sex.)
You sat down on your bed as Hoseok admired your room, standing still at some pictures. "Is that you?" He asked, holding up one in particular. You smiled and nodded, thinking back about old good memories. "That's me and my mom." You said as you thought back about her. Her soft hands, her warm smile. You missed her a lot. "What happened to her?" Hoseok asked; like he could read you expression. "Cancer..." You answered. "Dad was so broken after she died." You looked up from the picture at Hoseok again, giving him a sad smile. "It's not because we are feared mafia's that we don't know what true love is. What mom and dad had... Was something special. They really loved each other." You said.
Hoseok put the picture back down and walked over to you, sitting down next to you and holding your fragile frame. "I wish she was still here. She was a wonderful woman." You said as Hoseok softly caressed your head. "She told me I should always follow my heart."
Hoseok pulled back from the embrace and gave you a small reassuring smile. You don't know why but your body seemed to react on it and you started to smile back at him. You didn't knew how you became from being enemies only a few days ago to feeling so close to him now but it felt good and you kinda didn't want to let go of that feeling.
Hoseok put a strand of hair behind your face before speaking. "Y/n, what would you think of getting out of this... mafia live of yours? Just start a new life, a better one. Maybe even go start a family." He said.
You laughed ad shook your head. "I can't do that... I maybe had a choice as a kid but after my father died and I took over... I can't just leave like that. And besides... Some people here are like family to me. I can't just leave them." You told him.
"What if you could?"
Before you could answer him, the door to your bedroom opened. "Boss! I didn't knew you were already back and oh- You found him?! Do I need to get the guards?" Marcus asked after storming in.
You smiled and turned towards Marcus. "No need Marcus. It's alright. I made a deal with Mr Jung here so from now on he won't be our prisoner anymore. He will be our guest. And besides, I already told you to just call me by your name. You're not just anyone Marcus. You were my father's friend. So please be comfortable and just see me as a friend too." You said, earning a smile back from him. "Sure Y/n. Do you guys need anything?" He asked and you shook your head. "Not really but thank you Marcus. I'll see you later downstairs." You told him and with that he left your room again.
"Marcus?" Hoseok asked and you turned back to him. You nodded. "My father saved him a few years ago when I was still a kid. Since then he had been my father's most trusted man and also his friend. After he died he swore to protect his family no matter what. So that's how he became my wing man now." You told him and Hoseok nodded. "I see.."
You sighed and stood up. "Well... I should go downstairs now. Marcus is probably waiting for me. You can stay here until I come back our just room around a bit in the house. Whatever you like." You told him and he nodded. "see you later Hobi!" You said with a smile as you walked towards the door. Hoseok smiled back, even happier as he heard you used the little nickname again. "See you later." He said before you finally walked out of the door.
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"Ok... explain to me Y/n why that guy is just randomly relaxing in your room?" Marcus asked you once you were both sitting downstairs on the sofa. "Well Marcus, Like I told you, I made a deal with Mr. Jung." "Are you crazy?!" Marcus yelled. "That's like making a deal with the devil!"
"Calm down!" You yelled back at him, making him shut his mouth and sit back down. "Now let me explain." You d-said, fixing your hair. "When I was in Busan I bumped into Hoseok like planned. We... had a little encounter afterwards." You said, thinking back about how he kidnapped you but afterwards how he could pleasure you so well. You swallowed, stopping your thoughts and licking your dry lips. "Then Hoseok came with a proposition. His agency is after the Choi's. Even more then after us. He promised if we helped he would leave us alone afterwards." You explained to the man in front of you.
"And what makes you think he's speaking the truth?" Marcus asked you. You stared into the distance, a small smile forming onto your mouth. "I believe Hobi." You said.
Marcus looked at you with questionable eyes. "H-hobi?" He asked. You swallowed, eyes in shock. Did you just said that out loud?! You looked at Marcus. "I-" How were you going to explain this? "What happened back in Busan?" Marcus asked. "Nothing just-... I was tired of him giving me those little nicknames so I gave him one to annoy him too! Yeah! That's it." You said, a nervous giggle afterwards. You hoped he didn't suspected anything.
Marcus nodded. "Alright then.." He said, dropping the topic. "And besides, Imagine. For so long the Choi's have been at the top of Korea's mafia. Once they're down we're the new number one. We'll finally stand at the top Marcus! How wonderful is that!" You told him enthusiastic. Marcus nodded. "That's... Indeed great!" You frowned your eyebrows. You expected Marcus to be the most enthusiastic out of the two of you. "Is everything alright?" You asked him.
He cleared his throat. "Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. I was just worried about you. What if something happens to you. I still can't trust that Hoseok guy." He said. You gave him a soft smile, placing your hand on top of his. "Don't worry Marcus. I got this." And with that you stood up and walked out. "By the way Marcus," You said, turning around one last time. "Can you go check how Taehyung's work is going and give me an update on it? It's quite important and I only trust you with it." You told him. He nodded. "Of course. I'll go check right away boss!"
When you came back to your room you were surprised that Hoseok was still there. It was like he never left. "I thought you would've already went off to go explore the place." You said as you walked in. Hoseok looked up at you. "Neah, not really. I rather stay here. It's quiet here." He said, laying back onto the bed.
You went to sit at the edge of the bed and looked outside the big window in your room. Suddenly you felt Hoseok's hand grabbing yours and to Hoseok's surprise you laced your fingers with his. He smiled, looking at your face as it looked beautiful to him with the current lighting coming from your windows. You hair already got a bit messy from walking around all over the place all day. You may have been a target for him at first but right now, the only thing he could think about calling you was his angel. That's how you looked in Hoseok's eyes like an angel still trapped into the claws of the devil... The mafia. If he only could get you out of this life and give you a better one. "Leave this place with me tonight."
You turned your head towards Hoseok as these words came out of his mouth. "What?" "You heard me." Hoseok said, sitting back up and sitting a bit closer towards you. "Leave this place with me. Y/n, I can see this is no life for you... I promise I can give you a better one." Hoseok said, looking deep into your eyes. You suddenly felt all naked, like Hoseok could look right through you and into your soul. It's not like you loved the mafia but it also wasn't like you hated it.
"How...?" You quietly asked. "I already told you it's not that easy..." You said, looking down at your still intertwined hands. "Let's just leave this place tonight. No one will know. And we'll see what happens afterwards." Hoseok pushed your chin back up with his free hand. "Look at me Y/n. Do you trust me?" Hoseok asked.
You thought for a second, nervously chewing on your lip. Eventually you nodded your head. You knew you couldn't deny anymore what was happening between you and Hoseok. You knew it all went quick but there was just this sparkle between you and from today on you couldn't unseen it anymore.
Hoseok smiled at your response. "Good. So please Y/n, please come with me." He said, leaning in closer and delicately kissing your lips. You nodded. "A-alright. Let's get out of here tonight. But... I can't leave Taehyung here behind. I need him to go with us. He's my best friend Hope... We grew up together."
Hoseok looked you into the eyes while playing with your hand. "You're sure you can trust him enough to let him come with us?" He asked and you nodded. "I'm a hundred percent sure of it." Hoseok nodded. "Ok then. Go tell him. We'll leave at 3am. Everyone should be asleep by then."
And so as planned you went to speak to Taehyung. You told him the plan and of course he supported you in your decision. He was glad you asked him to go with you. He joked around saying' if Hoseok didn't take you away from here I would'. You laughed at him but then he started to question you about Hoseok and then the blushing and stuttering came. Of course, as the good friends you are, you told him about how you felt something towards the boy but wasn't quiet sure jet but it just felt right. As last you also talked about who the son of the Choi's could be but Taehyung only said it was difficult and he didn't knew yet.
After your little chat with Taehyung and bumping into Marcus inside the hall you were finally back in your room, making everything ready together with Hoseok. "Go get some rest Y/n." Hoseok said, packing the last of your things. You didn't intended to take much with you but no matter what Hoseok insisted he would help you pack. With the small bag finally packed you lay down onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. You heard Hoseok close the zipper of the back before feeling the mantras getting heavy next to you. "I am surprised I'm doing this... A few days ago I wouldn't even have thought of escaping this life. I was so focused on making my parents proud..." You said before scooping a bit closer towards Hoseok, resting your head on his shoulder while he wrapped his arms around you. "No matter what you do, I think your parents will always be proud of you Y/n. Now go sleep. You got a few hours." He said, kissing the top of your head.
"Goodnight Hope."
"Goodnight Y/n."
While you slept Hoseok didn't close an eye. He stayed awake all night, staring at you and also keeping the guard. He knew it may be foolish of him but there was someone in this house Hoseok didn't trust. And that was Marcus. Marcus had always been a strange figure in Hoseok's eyes and today it only got worse.
Hoseok lied to you when you asked him if he stayed in your room the whole time you were gone. In fact, Hoseok went to look for Taehyung. He had something in mind and the only one that could confirm it was him.
"Taehyung, can you look into someone for me?" Hoseok asked as he walked into Taehyung's office. "Who do you need me to look for?" The guy asked, looking at him from behind his desk. "I want you to get some research done on that Marcus guy."
Taehyung looked at him in shock. "Marcus? Why?" He asked, genuinely confused. "I don't trust him at all and I need to confirm something..." Hoseok said, standing behind Taehyung, looking at the screens.
"Marcus has been friends with Y/n's father for so long. Why wouldn't you trust him?" Taehyung said. "You don't think that-" Taehyung broke his own sentence into a silence as he finally understood what Hoseok was looking for. Hoseok nodded. "I think he's our man."
And just like he had thought Taehyung confirmed it that evening. Marcus was indeed the person you guys had been looking for. He was the son of the one and only Mr. Choi. But what would the son of a filthy rich mafia boss do in their enemies house? Hoseok could only think of one thing...
Then a bullet shot through the window and got caught by the opposite wall. Hoseok shook you awake. "Y/n wake up! Plans have changed, we need to go now!" You immediately woke up and you both stood up from the bed, only to hear another two gunshots. You both quickly laid flat on the ground. "W-what is that?" You asked, still halve asleep and confused. "They're here to kill you Y/n."
"What?!" You asked confused. "Who would possibly want to kill me?!" Again shots and Hoseok pulled you with him inside your closet. No windows there so the shutters don't know where to shoot anymore. Then a door opened giving you the answer to your question. "Well, hello hello!"
You looked at Hoseok in shock recognising the voice. Was that Marcus?! Hoseok put his finger in front of his lips telling you to not make any noise.
"Where are you little princess? I know you're somewhere in here~" Marcus said as you heard him walk around the room. "I know your lover boy is with you too." He said.
"You know... I wished things would've gone other ways but you just leave me no choice Y/n. You're just like your father." He said before shooting at the ceiling, making you jump a bit.
But what did he mean, just like your father? "You know the day your father died... It was my doing. He tried to escape too and just like you now, he left me no choice but to kill him right there and then."
You placed your hand over your mouth in shock. Your body was trembling while tears were threatening to leave your eyes. Marcus killed your father? But why would he ever do that? They were like best friends. Hoseok took your trembling body in his arms, shushing you quietly while he was eagerly looking for a way out of here.
Marcus started to speak again. "I know you're probably wondering... 'Oh why did you kill my daddy Marcus? Weren't you like best friends?' " Marcus said, trying to imitate your voice. "Well dear, It may look like we were friends but I am his worst nightmare. Your worst nightmare!" You heard him push a closet on the ground, making a hella loud noice. "You know who I am Y/n? Why doesn't Hoseok tell you, huh?" You looked at Hoseok confused. What would he know you didn't? "I am Marcus Choi. The son of the biggest, most feared mafia boss." Then a maniac laughter could be heard from him. "Wasn't it a great idea from me to infiltrate your little mafia and bring it down? After the accident happened everyone thought I died but I didn't, what caused me to be in the most ideal position. I thought when your father died I finally made an end to the Lee's but then you showed up from your house in the US and took over!" This time a vase could be heard shattering onto the ground. "Of course daddy's little girl had to take over business! Now where are you Y/n! Cut the crab and come out already!" Marcus yelled.
Hoseok slammed the door open as on clue and run with you towards the door as Marcus tried to shoot at the both of you. Luckly no bullet caught you. Or so you thought... "Hoseok! Your shoulder!" You said while you were running through the halls. "I'm alright. We need to get to Taehyung first to warn him and then get the hell out of here." He said. You looked at his shoulder and let go of his hand. "You'll need your hand to put pressure on that wound." You said.
"WHERE ARE YOU, YOU BITCH!!"
You quickly opened the door and ran into Taehyung's room as you heard Marcus yell from upstairs. "Taehyung!" You yelled as you run towards him and hugged him. He hugged you back. "I heard gunshots, what's happening?" He asked, letting go of you. Then he looked at Hoseok and his arm that was covered in blood. "Fuck that looks bad..." He said. "Is it Marcus?!" He asked and Hoseok nodded. "He somehow must have heard us talking about escaping. We need to go now."
"COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE!"
Marcus voice could be heard closer and closer. "He's getting near." You said. The panic could be seen in your eyes as you looked at the two boys. "You two need to get out of here as fast as possible." Taehyung said. "And what about you?!" You asked and he gave you a soft smile. "We can't escape with all of us. Marcus knows this place too well. He'll catch onto us in no time. You go and I'll distract him."
"But what if he hurts you like he did to Hoseok?!" You asked concerned. "Don't worry about me Y/n. I'll be alright. I always am in the end. Just trust me ok?" Leave the house and I'll make sure you escape safely." He said.
"He's right Y/n. We got to go now." Hoseok said as he pulled at your arm. You gave Taehyung one last glance. He smiled and nodded, like he was saying 'it's alright. It's all gonna be fine.' And so you trusted him on that and left with Hoseok through the front door.
"THERE YOU ARE!" Marcus yelled from the top of the stairs aiming his gun towards you but shot into the door because Hoseok could close it on time. A tear left your eye as you thought of Taehyung being inside there with that maniac. You were so scared of what Marcus could do to Taehyung. Then you saw the house go into lockdown. You knew this was Taehyung's doing and it was also a sign for you and Hoseok to leave.
"Where are your cars Y/n?" Hoseok asked. "Right there, behind that corner." you told him as you both ran towards the garages. You opened one and got inside the car as fast as possible, Hoseok behind the steering wheel. "Buckle up!" He said and then started the engine. But before you could ride away a shot was heard. You both looked at the side, it was Marcus. Somehow he managed to escape the house and he just shot one of your tiers. This was no good. "You both looked at him in shock as he aimed the gun towards you two again. Fear in both of your eyes this time as you had no where to run to now. You were so scared knowing this could be your last moment.
You still had so many things you wanted to do. You want to stop this mafia shit, make more times to spend with friends and family and most important of all, start a new better life with the one you loved... Hoseok. As you were so concentrated you didn't saw Taehyung stumble out of the house all beaten up by the hooligan in front of you.
You closed your eyes in fear of what would come and then it finally came. Two gunshots could be heard.
...But strangely they never reached you nor Hoseok. You opened your eyes again and saw Marcus coughing up blood before falling down onto the floor. Someone had shot him. Then from everywhere around the building and bushes men with guns appeared. Hoseok rushed out of the car and towards the men. You looked at your saviours in shock as Hoseok talked to them about something. Two persons went to check on the corps while Hoseok looked back and forth between you and then one he was taking to.
You decided to get out of the car as well and with small steps you walked towards Hoseok. He gave you a soft smile and then took you into a tight hug. "It's alright. It's all over now." He shushed you while caressing your hair as you cried into his chest from the chock and all the stress you had been going through tonight.
"Who is this Seok?" The man that was standing with Hoseok earlier asked. "This is Y/n. She was one of the people captured here by Marcus." Hoseok said. "I see... Can you both come testify one by one in a while?" The man asked. "Sheff, can we do it together? I don't think she's in a state to handle this on her own now." Hoseok stated and the guy nodded. "I give you 15min to calm down a bit. Come inside afterwards.
Once the guy left Hoseok let go off you and took a step back to look at you. "It's alright. Just take some deep breaths." You did as Hoseok said and it calmed you down a bit. "Now, I want you to let me speak when we get inside for the interrogation. If they know you're the boss of this whole mafia you hang." "They will put me in prison?!" You asked in shock and Hoseok shock his head. "No, no, no. I won't let that ever happen princess. Just let me do the talking and everything will be alright, ok?" He said and you nodded. "Ok.." "Good."
"Now... How did all these men come here?" You asked, confused on how Hoseok's men suddenly found your house. "I called them in. When you were talking to Marcus I went to Taehyung to search a bit more information about the man."
"You already knew... You didn't trusted him from the start." You said and Hoseok nodded. "I didn't trusted him indeed but I didn't knew. Well... I wasn't sure yet. So that's why I needed proof. Thanks to Taehyung's help I got it. I contacted my boss afterwards. I told them my location and everything they needed to know. My plan was to get you out first so they could storm in and clear this mess without you having to worry about it. I didn't knew he would come and try to kill you first..." Hoseok said, looking down. "I wanted to capture him to get to the Choi's as originally planned but then the shots and he tried to murder you and-"
"ssh," You said, placing your hands on both of Hoseok's cheeks. He looked up at you and you placed your forehead carefully against his. He calmed down a bit, taking a deep breath. "I'm here Hope. I'm right here. I'm still alive thanks to you. You did good by calling your troops here. Thank you for saving me." You said, smiling at him and he smiled back.
You took a deep breath yourself before both going inside for your interrogation. Like you discussed earlier outside Hoseok did the talking. He had to lie a bit for that but it was necessary to not get you in prison. He told them Marcus killed your dad and captured you afterwards. He told them Marcus took over and then caught him too. When you tried to escape today Marcus tried to kill you both and then the troops came in. That's the story Hoseok told the police. "Can you confirm this Ms. Lee?" The agent interrogating you asked. You nodded. "Yes it is. I have been captured by that battered for years until Hoseok finally came and saved me." You said, Hoseok squeezing your hand under the table as if wanting to tell you 'good job'.
After all that happened that day you still had to find a good story for Taehyung. After that was all done and Taehyung was completely healed again you and Hoseok decided to live together. Taehyung was so happy for the both of you. The only thing he ever wanted was to see his best friend happy and now he knew you finally were.
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"Guess who?"
You laughed as you knew who these hands and voice belonged too. "Hoseok, we're the only one in the house right now. Of course it's you." You said giggling. It had been a year since what happened with Marcus and right now you were living happily with Hoseok in a villa at the beautiful coast of Italy.
Hoseok took his hands from around your eyes and went to sit next to your legs onto the sunbed you were currently on. You put off your sunglasses and looked at the man in front of you as he leaned in closer for a kiss. For the ones asking, yes you and Hoseok were a pair. A month after everything that happened and after recovering from the chock for a while Hoseok finally asked you to be his and without hesitating you said yes. And so you now both lived happily in each other's presence.
"I got a surprise for you." Hoseok said, pulling back from the kiss and smiling at you. He then pulled an envelope from behind his back. "What is that?" You asked. "Open it." He said, giving you the envelope. You opened it and pulled out two tickets for... "The opera? Is this real?!" Hoseok smiled and nodded. You wrapped your arms around him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you so so so muchhhh!!" You said while hugging him happily. In that year of living together Hoseok slowly dithered out your love for opera and classical music so one day when he sat behind his computer he decided to get you a little present. "See it as an early birthday gift." Hoseok said as you let go of him and kissed him full on the lips. He laughed as he kissed you back, loving to see you so happy.
"It's tonight so I suggest you go pick a nice dress to wear because I know if I don't tell you now you'll take ages." You playfully hit his chest while he laughed. "It's true tho! Now go get ready, we leave at 6." He said. You stood up and got a smack onto your ass. "Yah-" You turned around and looked at him. He smiled and just put on his sunglasses laying down onto the sunned you payed on earlier, smirk on his face. "Go get ready! The longer you take the later it will get."
Once you and Hoseok were ready it was indeed almost time. "Told you, you always take a long time in the bathroom." Hoseok said, kissing your naked shoulder as he wrapped his arms around your waist. He checked you out through the mirror in front of you. "You look beautiful in that red off shoulder dress." He said and you smiled at him, kissing his cheek. "Thanks love. You don't look that bad yourself in that black suit with red tie." You turned around and playfully pulled on his tie, pulling him closer so you could kiss his lips. He kissed back, pushing you a bit backwards against the sink of your bathroom. "We should stop now or we won't even make it to the opera." Hoseok said, pulling away from you.
He did a step backwards and reached his arm towards you. "My lady," He said playfully. You laughed and wrapped your arm around his as you both walked out of the house and towards the car.
Once in the opera house Hoseok saw that sparkle in your eyes and it filled him with love and admiration for you. You looked so happy and it made him happy too. "Look how beautiful and classy it looks here! Wah." You said as you walked towards the giant stairs. "Did you knew that 'common people' always needed to sit at the low levels and that the rich sat at their private balcony? Until now it are still the most expansive places in the house." You told him, already walking towards the door that lead you towards the lower levels assuming your seats were there.
"Where do you think you're going?" Hoseok asked, pulling you back. "I'm going towards our seats?" You said questionable. "What else?"
Hoseok pulled you with him and onto the stairs. "Hoseok-" You said, looking at him in disbelieve while he pulled you with him up the stairs. "My princess only deserves the best." He said, kissing the top of your head before walking further through the hall on the second floor.
He opened a door with Hoseok's name written on and just like in every opera house there was your private balcony. "You really paid for all of this?!" You asked surprised while walking onto the small balcony, looking down at the podium a bit further. Hoseok went to stand behind you and held you as he admired the opera house with you.
You really were surprised at how he managed to pay for this. After leaving the mafia you of course also had to leave all the money behind. Mafia wasn't really legal so the money went towards the government who would do it's thing with it. You were already shocked at him Hoseok managed to buy the villa in Italy you were currently living in and now these expensive opera tickets?
"My job pays quite well Y/n. I think you sometimes underestimate my job as a secret agent love." He said, kissing your nape before letting go of you and sitting down in one of the chairs. "Come sit with me love." You went to sit down and as if on clue the lights dimmed and the show started.
"This was so good Hoseok! I loved it so much!" You said enthusiastically. The whole car it back home you couldn't stop talking about everything that evening. From the beautiful building to the lovely voice of the sopranos. He felt like he just took a little girl towards Disneyland, mesmerised by the many fairytales around her. That's how it felt with you right now. "Cute..." He mumbled as he opened the door for you.
Once you walked inside you saw something you didn't expected. The floor was covered with rose petals and on every closet or chair were cadges lighting the way towards the living room. You turned around towards Hoseok in shock. "Did- Did you do all this?" You asked him and he gave you a bright smile nodding. "I hope you like it." He said and you nodded. "Are you kidding?! I love it! Hope... You're so sweet." You said, a tear leaving your eyes.
Hoseok wrapped you in your arms letting out a soft chuckle. "Oh baby, don't cry now." He wipes the tear away that fell out of your eye. "This is supposed to be a happy day." He told you. You smiled through your tears. "It's just that- You're just so sweet Hobi, you're amazing and so kind and caring towards me. I can't help it." You said.
Hoseok softly kissed your lips. "It's alright love. I like doing cute and sweet stuff for you. Seeing you happy makes me happy. You know that. The only thing I want is for you to feel loved." He said. He turned you around, holding your hand. "Now go walk a bit further. I got another surprise for you." You gave him a questionable look before walking further.
"T-Taehyung?!" You run towards him and unfolded him into a tight hug. "You're here. You're really here!" When you left Korea Taehyung didn't. He decided to stay, going back to his family and live there for a while, while he would try finding a new job. You thought you would never see him again and here he was, right in your arms.
"Did you set this all up?!" You asked, pulling away from your arms. The boy laughed and nodded. "How did you manage to do all this?" You asked, looking around the room. There were red, pink and white balloons hanging at the ceiling, small red paper hearts were covering the curtains and of course the many candles and rose petals all over the place. "Thank you so much for this. Both of you. This is so cute." You said, your hands on your chest as you looked at the two boys and the work they pulled off.
"Oh, where are my manners." You said, fanning your head. "Sit down Tae! It's been so long. I wanna talk and know everything that happen with you while I was gone. You want something to drink?"
Taehyung laughed and stopped you. "It's alright Y/n. You don't need to do all this." He gave you a sweet smile. "Besides, this evening is supposed to be only you and Hoseok. I stay here for two weeks so enough time to talk later. You go and enjoy your night with your manz." Taehyung said, raising his eyebrows and taking his jacket off of the couch. "I'll leave you alone now. Have a great night guys!" He said, winking and smirking at you as he passed by. "See you tomorrow!"
You laughed as he left the place. "Aish that little-" You said as you watched him leave. Hoseok stood behind you again to hug you. He loved giving back hug's a lot lately. Even while you were sleeping he would always spoon you. "Baby?" Hoseok called out your name while he placed his head on your shoulder. "Let's do what Taehyung said and make this night ours." Hoseok said. "And how are you planning to do that Mister Jung?" You asked your boyfriend teasingly.
He took a deep breath. "I don't know yet Misses Jung." You turned around and looked at him in shock. In the past year he had never used his last name to address you until now. "Misses Jung?" He nodded and smiled taking a step backwards and suddenly going down on one knee. Your hands went to cover your mouth in chock. Was this real? Was he really just... proposing to you?
Hoseok pulled a small box out of his pocket and opened it. "Y/n Lee, what would you think of becoming Misses Jung? Will you marry me?" He asked sweetly. He was smiling but you knew inside he was very nervous. So you didn't made him wait long and started nodding your head. "Yes, a thousand times yes. I would love to become your wife Hope." You said and Hoseok's smile widened even more as he stood up again and held you close, his lips meeting yours into a soft but passionate kiss. "You have no idea how happy you make me right now." He said, kissing you over and over again.
You were expected to get the ring around your finger but Hoseok just tossed the box onto the couch and picked you up bridle style. You gasped as he swept you from your feet quite literally. "Let's go celebrate this upstairs, shell we?" He asked and you giggled, caressing his cheek and nodding, kissing his lips as he carried you both upstairs towards your room.
"I love you Hope."
"I love you too, Y/n. My miss mafia."
163 notes · View notes
yuta-nakamots · 3 years
Text
perfect - z.cl
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Pairing - Chenle x Fem!Reader
Genre - fluff, angst, university!au, friends to lovers!au
Warnings -  alcohol consumption, mention of drunkeness, lots of arguments, heavy making out, breakups, contains an aged up chenle (26-ish) towards the end
Summary - He’s definitely not your knight in shining armor, he may not be the one you bring home to mother, but he’ll be the one to give you flowers. Chenle is not the right one for you, but he is for right now.
Word Count - 5.2k
A/N - Bolded phrases are song lyrics taken from One Direction’s song ‘Perfect’ and inspired from the lyrics along with all the vlives where Chenle and the members have started yelling out the lyrics.This was supposed to come out back in January but school held it up and now Ana is gone hhhhh. I know she’s still on Tumblr but under a new url so if anyone wants to send this to her, to let her know that I did finish it, that would be nice. 
Taglist - @astroboy-lele​​​ @in-my-neofeelings​​​ || fill out this form if you’d like to join my general taglist ^^
Written for the Sometimes Letting Go… Collab originally hosted by @sunryu​ who unfortunately deactivated. 
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When I first saw you from across the room, I could tell you were curious
The mutual attraction between you and Chenle was undeniable. Ever since the two of you first met as freshmen in an econ class, you knew he was your twin flame and he was yours. That initial meeting was almost comical, the way the professor said to pair up and talk to someone next to them for a bit and it seemed like everyone had turned away from you except for the boy sitting next to you.
It seems you both had the same realization as your heads turned and eyes met. “Well I guess you’re my friend for today,” he began, “hi, my name is Chenle. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”
“Y/n,” you told him, “the pleasure is all mine.”
“So, why are you in this class?” He asked, tapping his pen on his leather-bound planner.
You hesitated for a second as you thought about how much to tell him. “I’m majoring in business and this was just one of the mandatory classes in my plan.”
“Hm, same here,” Chenle shared, seeming the slightest bit amused at your similarity, “would you also happen to be in calculus this semester?”
“Section 3 at 10:30?” You counter.
Chenle broke into a smile, “that’s the one.”
“How about freshman seminar?” You asked.
“1:15 in the world language building?” Chenle offered, copying your answer from before.
“Wow,” your eyebrows were raised in actual disbelief, “did you steal my schedule or something?”
“No, but I do believe in fate,” the boy next to you confessed, “would you like to get lunch sometime before freshmen seminar?”
You nodded, “I’d like that,” you stopped mid-sentence when you remembered that you told your friends you’d eat with them, “I am gonna be eating with my friends though so I could introduce you to them if you’d like.”
“Want to bet that we have the same friends too?”
“No way, that would be too coincidental.”
And coincidental it was. Somehow your friends knew some of Chenle’s friends whether it be from high school activities, childhood friends, or even having just met in their own classes. Your small group of five had immediately doubled in size.
Of course, with such a large group of friends, there was much fun to be had and many memories to be made. During midterms is when you were thankful you were majoring in business and not something like biology or chemistry. You could still go out and have fun on weekends with Chenle and the majority of your friends, meanwhile a few poor souls had to stay back to study their ‘reaction mechanisms’ or whatever the heck those things were called.
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You quickly found that you weren’t one for parties though you loved to hang out with your friends and have small little parties of your own in the dorms. Every single time, as you all got progressively drunker and started to clock out for the night, it was always you and Chenle left being the two most sober with no other choice but to take care of your friends over hushed conversations.
“How much vodka did Hannah even drink?” Chenle asked while you both worked on cleaning up the mess of solo cups and napkins surrounding your friend who had, unfortunately, drank over half of the bottle. You picked it up, waving it at Chenle to show him. “She’s gonna have a nasty hangover…or at least wake up super dehydrated.”
As you worked on laying a blanket across her, passed out on the floor, Chenle had managed to stuff all the napkins inside the cups he had collected and was busy aiming at the trash can across the room. Right as he was about to shoot, “miss!” you called out. The little stack of cups hit the rim of the plastic trash bin and fell to the floor. Chenle turned to you, sticking out his tongue and imitating the way you caused him to mess up before going to properly dispose of the rubbish.
Instead of simply placing it in the waste, he once again returned to where he stood before, with one eye shut, aiming for the bin. You let out a scoff, ready to disturb him once more. He shot you a glance, knowing what you were planning from the way you just stood watching him. But regardless, he tried again. “Airball” you sang as he released the short stack of cups, sending them flying to the foot of the bin.
Chenle let out a growl, childishly stomping his way over to you while you tried to quietly escape from his grasps through the mess of food and other miscellaneous items on the floor. From the hushed giggles and name-calling from the two of you as you both stumbled around the room, to the whispered late-night thoughts and affirmations spoken from your positions on the floor with your heads resting on the edge of a bed, you barely even noticed how fast time was passing.
“Are you going home for the holidays?” You asked him.
He shook his head, “it’s my first time getting to live away from my parents and whenever I do go back, they’ll probably be expecting me to bring some girl with me.”
You turned to look at him, “why would they expect that?”
“They’re both getting old and want to retire soon,” Chenle started, “so the faster I get married and take over the company, the faster they’ll get to live out the rest of their lives,” he explained.
“Well that’s not very nice of them,” you commented, “what kind of parents would place such high responsibility on their child like that?”
“Mine I guess,” Chenle sighed.
After a moment of silence, you sat up, unsure what to make of the next words to come out of your mouth. “If you want, I could go with you.” Chenle looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed. “Like, I could be your fake girlfriend or something so that they don’t bother you so much about finding one.”
“That’s…an idea,” he started, biting on the corner of his lip as he played out possible scenarios in his head. “I think that would only make it worse though since we’d both have to make up stories and tell the same information.”
“True. But we could at least make it look believable, don’t you think?” You reached over to pet Chenle’s head the same way you’ve seen him do to his friends. “Oh, Chenle, you’re so cute,” you cooed, “I can’t wait to marry you and be with you for the rest of our lives.”
He grabbed your wrist and put it in your lap, not very keen on the show of affection. “Yeah, I think we’d look like a pretty convincing couple.”
“Do we look good together though?” You pondered. “If we were to show up to an event or something, would we make people stop and stare at us?”
“Anyone can do that if they wear something weird or do something out of the ordinary-“
“Okay but that’s not what I’m asking,” you interrupted, “I’m asking, would we look good together as a couple?”
Chenle shrugged apprehensively, “sure.” Your eyes bore into him as if forcing a more legit answer out of him. “Yes, I think we would look good as a couple.”
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It was as if you and Chenle were made for each other. Whatever one did, the other was never too far behind. It was absolutely no surprise to your friends when you told them Chenle had asked you out and you became official. While your college careers continued and friends came and went, Chenle was always with you. He was your solid island in the middle of a tumultuous sea, your oasis in a dried desert. You didn’t need anyone else around to have fun, just him, just the two of you.
But if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms and if you like having secret little rendezvous
Being with Chenle was as wild as things could get. It meant impulsive plans and bad decisions. Weekend nights normally consisted of one of you driving with no destination in mind until someone got hungry. Even at that point, the night didn’t end.
Sometimes the two of you would stay out past midnight, not wanting to leave each other’s company just yet. The feeling of the wind whipping past you as Chenle drove or the thrill of gassing it down the freeway was almost dreamlike. One would think that at this point, you’d return home, but for you, your home was wherever Chenle was. If it meant staying in a small hotel room for the night drinking cheap wine out of paper cups then so be it, that was home.
“Baby, you already drank almost half of the bottle, leave some for me,” Chenle teased, his eyes glimmering under the low lighting. The brightness of the small lamp on the desk failed to reach where he was sitting, the cozy armchair too far in the corner for it to be illuminated.
“Come here and get some then,” you suggested, lazily winking at him before downing another shot-sized gulp and enjoying the burn from the liquid running down your throat. The bed you were sitting on wasn’t all that soft but you had already warmed up a little spot of it and gotten too comfortable to move.
Chenle raised an eyebrow at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I don’t think you want me to do that.”
“Why not?” Your expression mirroring his.
“You wanna find out?
“Maybe I do.”
He let out a scoff and within a second he was on the bed, climbing up and settling over you. His warm breath fanned your neck, the scent of alcohol filling your senses. “Are you sure about that?”
“Fuck around and find out, handsome,” you taunted.
You had barely even finished your sentence before Chenle’s lips were on yours, his usual soft and pillowy lips became hot and heavy against yours under the guide of the fifteen-dollar wine. You were sure that you were definitely getting tipsy but Chenle’s love and passion were even more overwhelming. It was moments like this when you felt that you were drunk off of his love and it was absolutely intoxicating in the best way.
If you like to do the things you know that we shouldn’t do, then baby I’m perfect
It was drunk weekends like this that led to a rocky start of the following week. It’s not that you and Chenle were bad students, it’s just that when you become totally infatuated with the person you love, you start to devote yourself to them instead of what actually needs to get done.
As sophomores in college, one would think that you’d have a little more self-control but with Chenle, you just couldn’t help it. He was worse than any drug you could ever take, to the point where your friends would have to intervene and keep you in your rooms until a substantial amount of work was done.
You called them annoying but really you should’ve been thankful to them for caring so much about you back then, and you are thankful, looking back on it. They always told you ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder’ and you wish you had listened to them. Maybe if you did, you wouldn’t have lost a relationship that you thought was practically flawless.
Perfect for you
In junior year, that is when your beautiful illusion finally began crumbling down. Your workloads grew heavier and your hours of sleep decreased. Chenle would often leave you on read, having opened your message in the middle of studying then forgotten to reply to it. Even when you childishly got upset at him for that, he’d always give you the same apology or buy you something cute as if money could shut you up.
With little to no distance between the two of you, it was easy for boundaries to be crossed and for problems to go unaddressed. You can feel like you know someone so well, that they’ll always understand what you mean and they can read your words like a book, but it didn’t seem that way anymore with Chenle.
He’d make fun of the way you always made him say ‘I love you’ at least once a day or some of your other pet peeves, including the way you had a Hello Kitty mouse pad that was ‘too childish for a college student to be using.’ It may have been out of love but it sure didn’t seem that way.
I might never be the hands you put your heart in or the arms that hold you any time you want them
Soon, the little pricks in your relationship spread past closed doors and into your schoolwork. Sharing a major and classes with your significant other was not exactly ideal, especially when they had different values and beliefs from you and had to argue for their reasoning.
“That just isn’t sustainable in the long run though,” you commented as you read through Chenle’s senior research report while seated opposite of him inside a library study room.
He ran a hand through his hair, leaning back into his seat, about to repeat himself for the fourth time. “It’s not about sustainability, it’s about the profit margin that’s being made. What don’t you get?”
“It’s not good for the environment, it’s not good for the people working in the factories,” you point out, “I don’t get how you can subject these things onto people.”
“Y/n, we’re business majors,” he stated plainly, “we study money, the economy, sales, company relationships, we’re not here to be environmentalists. Things don’t have to last very long, so much as they make a profit.”
“But we should think about the impact of our future businesses and their longevity in the world-”
“You should think about passing this class and stop being so prissy and uptight about saving trees or whatever the fuck you’re going on about.”
You were absolutely shocked at the words that had just come out of his mouth. This wasn’t the first time he had seemingly degraded you in this manner, but when it came to school and your own work, you were deeply offended at what he had said, especially since both of you had spent many hours on your respective projects.
“Chenle,” you began softly, “tell me you didn’t mean that.”
He refused to meet your gaze, “If I told you that then I would be a liar.”
“Look, you can’t just spew whatever bullshit you want and just expect that people won’t get hurt,” you criticized, only to be cut off once more.
“Then maybe you should learn to not take everything so seriously,” he snapped back.
“I...I think we need a break.”
“Agreed.”
“No, from each other.” Chenle’s head whipped up to look at you, his eyes went wide when he realized what you were insinuating.
“Baby no, you know it’s not like that,” he started, but it was already too late. You blocked his voice out of your head as you packed your belongings, just wanting to get out of this room, wanting to get away from him.
This wasn’t the first time you had fought with him in this way but it felt like you had finally lost all your patience. You were tired of always being told you were wrong and having your thoughts and ideas invalidated. As you stormed away from the library, you realized that maybe you needed to let go of things that no longer brought you joy.
Sometimes letting go...is a new start
After that incident, you did indeed have a fresh start. You slowly removed Chenle from your life and just in time for graduation. Whenever he tried to approach you on campus, you always turned the other way even if it meant being late to class. Luckily, you didn’t have many shared classes with him anymore and you were all the more grateful for it right now.
You’d come back to your campus apartment with the occasional flower or sticky note left on your doorstep asking you to give him another chance but you simply didn’t have enough time or energy to care anymore. Commencement was approaching and you still had yet to hear back from any of the companies you had applied to for internships.
But that don’t mean that we can’t live here in the moment
One of your friends had mentioned that Chenle had already received news that he was accepted into his family’s business, a large company in China, and you wished you could’ve been there when he had read the email. You could practically hear his yell of delight, his laugh when he’d turn to hug you, even if it was practically guaranteed that he’d get in, you missed it all so much but there was no turning back now.
It wasn’t until after commencement did you receive your own letter of acceptance from one of the largest foreign trade companies in the area after you saw Chenle for the last time. “Zhong Chenle, Bachelor of Arts in business management.” You remembered the immense pride and pain you felt in your chest, watching him walk across the stage to claim his diploma as you sat clothed in the same cap and gown only a few rows away. You wished you could share your emotions with him, but you had to remind yourself that he was no longer yours, he was no longer the man you first fell in love with.
‘Cause I can be the one you love from time to time
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Four years have passed since that moment at commencement. In those four years, you’ve climbed your way up in the company, taking a hold of a directing position in project development and management. With all your success though, there was always one failure that kept floating through your mind. The number of sleepless nights and wandering moments you’ve spent thinking about all the ‘what ifs’ and the changes you should’ve made in your relationship have all decreased with time, but sometimes it all comes crashing back. You miss the memories you made with him and you miss being so young and naive.
Sometimes you managed to hear a thing or two about the company he worked for but you never paid much attention to it, always falling back into a spiral of guilt and calling yourself the sole reason why your relationship fell apart. Chenle would even pop into your mind at the weirdest times when you’d be thinking of anything but him.
Like the other day as you were staring out the window of your office, watching people and cars pass by, your memory of Chenle speeding down the empty highway suddenly resurfaced. The adrenaline you felt from the buildings and signs whizzing by, the slight buzz of alcohol you felt in your system, the cool air coming in from Chenle’s window, the warmth of his hand in yours. You couldn’t help but smile at it fondly yet it turned sour when you thought of the last time he ever drove you somewhere. You had argued with him about something dumb, you couldn’t even remember it at this point, and you even slammed the door before storming off to who knows where.
Or some months ago, you were interviewing possible new hires for the company and met someone from Puerto Rico. Once you finished the interview with them, you sat at the wooden desk while remembering the way you teased Chenle because he didn’t know how to pronounce Puerto Rico. You thought it was cute and even told him that, but it ended up in another fight because you may have spent a little too long dwelling on the topic.
But oftentimes when you find yourself thinking about him, you’d wonder how he’s doing. Is he happy where he is right now? What kinds of things is he doing for his job? Has he found a new girlfriend? What if he dated many other people after me? What if he’s married? Would he have children by now? Or most importantly, ‘does he still love me?’
And if you like midnight driving with the windows down, and if you like going places we can’t even pronounce
Regardless, you’d shake off all these thoughts and continue about your day, completing the tasks assigned to you. The majority of your time was spent conducting interviews and deliberating with the directors about who to hire for what position. It was quite fun, really. You got to meet all of the new hires before they came into the company and you felt empowered by the fact that you would be indirectly responsible for the future of the company in this sort of way.
On one particular day, everything felt like it was going just a little too well. Your hair was done just the right way, traffic was light, your coworkers seemed to all be in a good mood, but most importantly, there were no fat folders sitting on your desk, waiting for you to go through. Just a single sheet of paper with the list of the new hires coming in for their briefings along with the notes you were required to go over.
You didn’t bother checking it, seeing as how you had exactly two minutes left before the scheduled meet time, which was exactly the amount of time you needed to head downstairs to the conference room. You really should have checked the list though. It would have prepared you for the shock of seeing a certain someone sitting at the table in a suit that looked all too good on him.
“Zhong Chenle?” You audibly gasped, pausing in your tracks the moment you entered the conference room.
His eyes were already on you as if he knew you’d be the person to walk through that doorway at that exact moment. “That would be me.”
The other new hires looked around at each other sharing all types of glances. Worried, suspicious, surprised, questioning, nothing really all that positive. “Sorry, he’s just an old friend that I was surprised to see,” you quickly explained, trying to pull yourself back together.
Throughout your whole presentation, it was like all the attention in the world was directed at you. Never had you felt this nervous before doing something that was supposed to be so familiar. Every time your eyes glanced over in Chenle’s direction, his gaze managed to catch yours as if he was trying to speak to you without any words.
By the time you adjourned the meeting and sent the new hires off to their respective departments, it felt like you had run a marathon. Your palms were clammy, your legs shaky, your mind racing, and your heart was pounding.
Chenle was the only one left in the conference hall while you pushed in all the chairs and turned off the lights. “Looks like these years have done you well.” He commented, finally able to take in the sight of you now that there was no one else around.
“I could say the same for you.” His shoulder had gotten broader and any childlike features had left his face. He truly looked like he had grown into a man. The dark gray suit he was wearing fit the lines of his body so well, it made you think he could’ve been a model instead of simply becoming an office worker. “So how have you been?”
He did a classic Chenle shrug, “nothing much really. I started off being just a marketing employee, did some work, and got myself to be chief marketing officer. It seems you’ve gotten much further than I have, though. Project development and management?”
“Oh, it’s not anything huge. I just help with planning things out and doing all the paperwork for its execution. I only do interviews and help with hiring when we’re in season, which would be why I’m here right now,” you explained, motioning for him to follow you out of the room. “Your new supervisor is probably wondering where you are. I sent the rest of the newbies a few minutes ago already. I’ll just tell him that you had a few questions about our operations.”
“Wow, cheating the system? That’s not the way I remember you,” Chenle said with mock disapproval. You led him to the elevators, pleasantly surprised to find one still on your floor after you hit the ‘up’ button. Your eyes met with his while you gestured for him to go in. “Ladies first,” he had a cat-like grin on his face as you rolled your eyes and stepped into the elevator.
“So why did you decide to leave your company? Weren’t you going to take it over someday?” You ask over the squeaking of the doors closing.
Chenle leaned against the cold metal wall of the elevator, “I still plan to but I felt like they were just kind of babying me or treating me differently because they knew of my background,” he explained. You could only nod to acknowledge the fact that you were listening. “I told my parents that I wanted to get experience outside of the company and they didn’t really understand at first until I showed them my point of view and how it’s a little worrisome to perhaps, learn how to cook when you always have chefs around you giving you instructions down to the tiniest things.”
The elevator came to a stop and the heavy doors opened onto the floor Chenle would be working on. “But why this company? We’re not even closely related to yours?” You led him down the hallway in the direction of his supervisor's office.
“My parents were the ones who recommended it, actually. It would be a little risky to go to a neighboring one in the case of it being viewed as a betrayal or like some kind of inside mission so they said I should just come back here since I’d probably have a high chance of acceptance-“ you put a hand up to stop him from talking, seeing how many of the other employees had started to look at him due to his volume.
“Chenle, must I remind you that this is an office?” You gritted out, embarrassed in front of your colleagues.
He shook his head before turning to the mass of them, bowing politely then continuing in the same direction as before. Once both of you reached the head office at the end of the hallway, Chenle spoke up once more. “By any chance, are you free tonight?”
“That depends,” you began, “what are you hinting at?”
“Just seeing if you’d like to go out to dinner so we can properly catch up, I guess,” he proposed bashfully.
You hummed in thought, “mmm, put in a good word for me with your supervisor and you’ve got a deal.”
“Deal,” he agreed.
“Meet me in the lobby at 5:30, don’t be late,” you told him before knocking on the wooden door in front of you and allowing Chenle in.
If you like to do whatever you’ve been dreaming about, then baby you’re perfect
You thought Chenle’s wine phase in college would be just that, a phase, but it really wasn’t. He had ordered an expensive bottle of merlot even with all your insistence that you wouldn’t be drinking and even made him promise that he’d be sober enough to drive himself back to wherever his accommodations were.
He made a face of fake dismissal before picking up your last conversation. “So anyway, as I was saying earlier, my parents suggested that I come back here, especially since I got my degree from the university so I’m bound to get in.”
You were about to open your mouth to say something like “getting in is not a guarantee” especially coming from your experience in doing interviews and having to decide which applicants to turn down, but you decided against it.
“Initially, I was a little against it since I didn’t want to come back to somewhere I’ve already stayed at for some time,” he confessed, “but after I did some research on the company and found out that you’re one of the associates, I was a little more open to the idea.”
There was a break of silence while you started to link your thoughts together. “So you came here because you found out that I work here?”
“Yes, but also no,” Chenle stated, blurting the second part out rather quickly when he saw the shift in your expression. “It is true that I wanted to see you and how you were doing but it’s not just that. I figured that if you worked here and had such a high position, it must be a good place to work.”
“But what I’m hearing is…you came here because of me,” you state bluntly though your heart couldn’t help but let out a cheer of delight.
Chenle redirected his gaze at the neighboring tables. “You could say that, sure.”
“Chenle, what do you want out of this? What do you want out of me specifically?” You contended. His eyes continued to flit around the lowly lit space, not daring to meet yours unlike earlier in the conference hall. “What? Did you come back just expecting me to run into your arms? Did you think we would just pick up where we left off?”
Now he looked down at the white tablecloth, as if in shame. “Would it be wrong of me to ask for a second chance?”
You too joined him in staring at the table, wishing that he had answered ‘no’ to your previous questions. “It wouldn’t exactly be wrong, but it’s not right either. I’d be willing to give you a second chance if we agree to not call it that, but rather a promise.”
He finally looked up at you again, his dark pupils catching the dim golden lights above him. “A promise?”
You nodded. “We’re older now, we’re fully grown adults with jobs to do and taxes to pay. We’re no longer the same carefree college students we used to be.”
“Well yeah, obviously-“
“No, listen,” you interject, cutting him off, “we can’t just recklessly play with each other’s minds and feelings like we used to. No more games and no more ‘next times.’ If we try again, I want this to be a promise that we’ll both do better because we can and we want to.”
“If it’s a promise that you want then,” Chenle held out his hand with his pinky finger extended, “it’s a promise I’m willing to make.”
You linked your pinky with his before bringing your thumbs together and sealing the promise. Matching smiles appeared across both of your faces as you stepped into a new chapter of life with Chenle by your side once more.
Sometimes letting go is…perfect. So let’s start right now
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mypoisonedvine · 4 years
Text
Satisfied | Andy Barber x reader (chapter 3)
(chapter 1) (chapter 2) 
series summary: you’re the only lawyer in Boston who can get under Andy Barber’s skin, but you didn’t realise that he was trying to get under your clothes.  as is the nature of law, it’s only a matter of time before the truth is discovered.
word count: 4.3k
warnings: smut, rough sex, safewording, oral (f receiving), angst, non-linear storytelling/flashbacks
a/n: I wrote this series originally with my friend joyce, and after she deactivated some of the chapters were lost.  this series is long-since completed, but I’m reposting now so people can still read!
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You stretched a little, eyes still closed to protect them from the blinding sunlight peeking in. Daylight had crept up on you, and it came quickly. You were sure that you had only fallen asleep a mere few minutes before you woke; muscles sore from overexertion. Letting out a groan, you shifted your body once again trying to get comfortable. 
Andy really did a number on your body and you needed a deep stretch to try and regain some control over your aching muscles. You turned and looked at him. Andy was peaceful. His brows were relaxed and his mouth was slightly agape. You hadn’t realized just how badly you missed seeing him like that. So much so that you caught yourself just in time. Your hand had almost reached his cheek before pulling back.
“Stop moving,” Andy mumbled from beside you. When you did not quit the shuffling, he groaned and wrapped his arms around your body, trapping you beneath his weight. 
It caused you to hesitate and freeze for a second. His body heat radiated onto your naked body. His skin against yours. Memories of the night before flooded your mind and it’s then that you realized that the feeling of his body was ingrained in your existence.
“Andy…” you whispered but he ignored you, snuggling back into the sheets instead. It felt almost domestic. And wrong. It felt really wrong. Maybe it was the fact that it reminded you of being young, and in love, again.
In love with Andy.
---
“We should do this again sometime,” Andy beamed as you got up off the bed and pulled your t-shirt back over your head from where it had been tossed onto the floor.  Ah yes, the telltale smile of a man who just got laid.
“Andy, I probably should’ve been more clear,” you admitted.  “I’m not looking for a relationship.  I’m too busy, and I’ve always felt that single women are taken more seriously in law school.”
You expected him to question it, but he nodded.  “Yeah, that is probably true.  Fucked up, but true.”
He hopped up and followed you before you could walk to the bathroom, turning you around with a hand on your shoulder.  “Does that mean that we can’t do this again?”
“Oh, we’re definitely going to do it again,” you grinned, biting your bottom lip.  “Just, not as boyfriend and girlfriend.”
He seemed happy enough with that answer, if not ecstatic. 
“But for now, I need to study, so get out of my room,” you chuckled, watching him redress with a satisfied smirk on your face.
---
Another party, another stupid performative social event, another red plastic cup with god knows what in it that you have no intention of actually drinking.  Or at least you had no intention when you walked in.
Andy was better at this.  People actually cheered when he came into the room— but admittedly he was also holding booze so, they might have been cheering for that.  But they were still happy to see him, and who wouldn’t be?  You were too, but you tried to hide it.  The company line was still that you two didn’t care much for each other, and it was… somewhat true, he still got on your nerves, but you undeniably had a soft spot for him.  Perhaps literally.
You decided you could pull him aside for a chat once, that wouldn’t be too suspicious.  But it couldn’t be right as he walked in, so you were basically just counting the minutes in your head until you could talk to him.  But then you were just trying to not get caught looking at him every 30 seconds.  How was he so… attractive?  Not just hot, but magnetic.  Guys jumped over to laugh with him.  Girls hung off his arm while he told hilarious stories.  And here you were, across the room staring because you didn’t want to be a part of his harem.
Speaking of harem, he seemed to have a new fan tonight, and she was hanging onto his every word.  You’d seen her around before— Jessie something, most likely short for Jessica but at the moment you decided it was short for Jezebel.  She was cute.  Gorgeous, actually.  One of those girls who looked like she just got up in the morning and brushed her hair and was already model-perfect.  You tried not to hate that about her, you tried not to hate her because she was just a beautiful girl talking with this amazing, charismatic guy and you had no reason to be mad at her because she was just— oh my fucking god did she just grab his bicep???  SKANK!
You left the party quickly after that, deciding you didn’t like the person you were becoming.  One of the many, many reasons you’d sworn not to get involved with guys in law school was because you knew how women could get defensive and territorial over men, and you were never going to prioritize getting dick over being a good feminist.  How had you already fallen so far?
You were grateful for the half-empty bottle of Fireball in your cupboard. It was to be your companion to drown out the sorrows. You hoped that it would be enough to make you forget what you saw. Especially the fact that Jezebel and Andy would have made a good couple. They looked good together. Not right. But good nonetheless.
---
“...the defendant clearly has the mental capacity for there to be mens rea. He should be prosecuted and I don’t understand how I am the only person that thinks so,” Andy tugged at his hair in frustration as you walked beside each other down the hall. “I think it’s ridiculous that--”
“Are you fucking that Jessie chick?” you suddenly interjected, trying (and failing) to curb the anger bubbling in your stomach. Andy’s eyebrows shot up and you felt a sense of dissatisfaction at the response. He proceeded to drag you into an empty classroom.
“You have no right to be jealous,” he reminded you firmly.  “We’re not dating.” 
“I know, I know. Who said that I’m jealous?” you frowned, but your voice was a lot higher than usual, “but that doesn’t mean I’m down to catch whatever cooties you get from her.”
“You think I’m gonna sleep with her?” he asked incredulously.
“Uh, yeah,” you retorted with a heavy layer of patriotism, “and everyone else thinks so, too.”
He reached out and cupped your face, tilting it up to make sure you were looking at him.  “Just because we’re not together… doesn’t mean I want anybody else.” He looked so sincere and sounded so soft that it took you aback. You had never expected Andy to say that. Ever.
“I… what?”
“Baby,” he sighed, and your heart tensed a little, “you’re the reason I’m not your boyfriend.  I don’t want to date anybody else, I don’t want to be with anybody else… you’re it.  Just you.”
“Oh,” you nodded with wide eyes.
“Are you… seeing other people?  Not that you can’t, I just… I didn’t think you were.”
“No, no,” you dismissed, “I only… no.”
“Then let’s make it official.  You have no reason to be jealous.  Be my girlfriend.”
“But I—”
“We don’t have to tell people,” he quickly backpedaled.  “I know you don’t want to be seen as half of a couple, or an extension of me or something.  But I wanna be able to call you my girlfriend.  Even if I can’t actually tell anybody about it.”
You looked at him, making sure he wasn’t joking or messing around before slowly nodding. His face lit up, “but we have to keep it on the down-low,” you reminded him quickly, to which he nodded.
“That we do. Verity would advocate for our expulsion if she knew.” Your eyes went wide with fear. Andy was right. It had the potential to completely decimate your career.
“Andy, we can’t tell anyone about this,” you whispered sharply, “especially now that we’re on a case together.”
“Calm down, baby,” he soothed. It was the first time he called you that since you became secretly-official and it sounded different now, somehow; it made your stomach flutter a little. “Trust me, I know, and it will be fine. Verity won’t find out.”
“Okay,” you nodded, believing him, “however, you really shouldn’t be calling Dr. Verity Woods, J.D. Esq. by her first name alone.”
“You don’t need to use her full name and title,” Andy laughs, “she said it’s fine to call her by her first name. You were there.”
“That I was. But it doesn’t feel right, especially since she’s leading the case.”
Andy shook his head and smiled. You really were something else but he needed it. He needed you. Even all of the crazy and particular aspects of your personality. “Speaking of her, I need to go to her office in—” Andy looked at his watch— “shit, 10 minutes.”
“Well, go, run,” you gestured at the door and Andy bolted out, not even having the time to peck your lips. You waited a few moments before leaving the room, not wanting to attract any attention.
---
“Hey, cupcake,” he cooed and then kissed your ear. Without having to look at him, you knew that he had a smug grin on his face and enjoyed the teasing.
“You eat one cupcake one time and suddenly it becomes your whole identity,” you groaned with a roll of your eyes. Andy’s body pressed up against yours and you tried to push him off but the warmth of his body was far too comforting.
“But you looked so cute when you got frosting on your nose,” he recalled.  
“Go away,” you giggled and squealed as Andy tickled you, “s-stop it.”
“Come on, cupcake, you can do better than that,” Andy continued to tickle you until you fell on the floor in a giggling heap, “all you have to do is let me call you cupcake.”
“Andy—” you squealed. “Barber, you better stop this right now!” Your stomach hurt from the laughter as his fingers dug into your waist making you scream.
“Come on, cupcake.”
“N-no!”
“Since that’s the case, I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing.” 
“Fine!  Fine,” you relented, “you win.”
---
You looked around the sterile reception as you took a seat on the plush sofa and looked out of the window. The California sun shone into the room illuminating everything in its path. You weren’t running away, you told yourself repeatedly. Maybe you would believe it at some point. It was simply that you needed a change of scenery.
One thing that you were sure of was that you were more than qualified for the job. And that should be enough. But it came at a cost. Your personal life. It had always been on the back-burner for you but you had to accept you had chosen the lonely path. 
Nobody had ever told you just how much you, as a woman, had to sacrifice to be successful. And so you learnt the hard way. Your friends told you that you had made your bed so you had to lie in it. They were not wrong but they did nothing to ease the vacancy in your heart. 
Flicking through one of the magazines on the table, you let it distract you from the ticking clock. It seemed that you were the only person that was there for the job which should have eased your nerves. But you haven’t always been the first choice. 
---
“Am I remembering correctly that you were valedictorian of your class?” the man across from you had your resume in front of him and was still unable to get it right. Maybe the job was not right for you. But it was a better offer than still being in Boston.
“Salutatorian,” you corrected coldly, gaze piercing. You tapped your nails on the table as the interviewer tried to regain his posture. 
“Oh, well,” he shrugged, “that’s still pretty good.”
Pretty good.  You didn’t believe in stuff like that.  There was greatness, and nothing else.  “Well, that’s the past,” you quickly shut off the conversation about your greatest failure and threw the man a tight-lipped smile.
“So,” he cleared his throat, “what makes you think that you will be suitable for the role?”
The fear left your system. You were sure of yourself. You were more than qualified. 
---
“Time to get up for breakfast,” Andy roused you from your sleep. You had no idea when you went back to sleep but it was your turn to groan. “Don’t make me wake you up; you won’t like that.”
“I’m tired. Leave me alone, Barber,” too tired and sore to really care about eating or the punishment. That being said, you were a little hungry after missing dinner.
“I know you’re sore so don’t make me wake you up,” he warned but you still refused to pay him any mind. That was your mistake as Andy ripped the covers from your body; exposing it to the chilly morning air. 
“What are you doing?” 
Andy didn’t respond. Instead, his face went to your core. “Fuck, you’re so pretty,” he cooed, “I think it’s time for you to wake up.” He licked a stripe across your sex and watched it glimmer in the light. Fisting the blankets beneath you, your back arched involuntarily.
You let out a breathy moan when he parted your folds to allow his tongue better access to your dripping cunt. He licked and explored your body like it was the first time he was given the privilege. 
“Taste so good,” his voice reverberated through your body sensing little shocks of pleasure through you. Andy suckled on your clit making you cry out. His beard scratched the soft skin of your inner thigh and your sensitive folds. The contrast of his soft, wet tongue and his rough beard made your eyes roll back.
“Andy,” you mewled, “please.”
“What do you want?” Andy taunted you. Your body kept moving; your hands tugging at the sheets. You needed him to do more. He was teasing you. “Words, my little fuckdoll.”
You were unable to form any coherent sentences when Andy had such control over your body. He inserted one finger into your aching core, massaging your walls. “You have to use your words or I’ll stop now seeing as you’re awake.”
“No,” you rushed out. “P-please let me come.” You had no dignity left but you were too far gone to care. You needed Andy’s mouth and fingers too badly. 
“Well,” Andy clicked his tongue as his lips curled into a smile, “since you asked so nicely...”
---
Unable to find your clothes fast enough, you found a discarded Harvard sweatshirt of his and slipped it on, smiling to yourself at the bagginess. Looking down at the left sleeve, you realized that it was the same one you wore when you were dating. It made you feel a little nostalgic. The sweatshirt was practically yours.
You emerged from the bedroom to find him in the kitchen with an apron on-- why the fuck did he own an apron?-- and messing around at the stove.  He must have heard you enter because he turned to you with a smile.
“Huevos rancheros!” he announced with a smile, lifting the pan for you to see.
You looked to him, and the pan of eggs, and around his stylish condo worthy of an ADA’s inflated salary, and shivered with the overwhelming sense of ‘wrong’. That was even in spite of your rumbling stomach. “Andy, stop, this is all too much. Too domestic,” you whispered, unable to look at Andy when you said it.
“Don’t say that. Don’t say things like that,” Andy pleaded, “I just want to see you.”
“What do you mean?” 
“Exactly what I said. I want to see you.”
“You’ve seen me before.”
“But I can’t remember the last time that I saw the real you,” Andy’s words made your stomach turn. “I don’t know the last time I saw the you that I fell in love with all those years ago.”
“She doesn’t exist anymore, Andy,” you whispered, “you need to let her go.  God knows I did.”
“No, she’s not. I don’t believe that,” he argued; heart breaking by the second, “she’s still there, I’m certain of that. You wouldn’t end up here so often if she doesn’t exist. And you wouldn’t be so upset about not being valedictorian.”
“We shouldn’t keep doing this, Andy,” you decided with a sigh as you found your purse and attempted to gather your things.  Where the fuck were your clothes again?
“No. You don’t get to say that,” he raised his voice, shedding his apron as he left the kitchen, “you can’t just waltz back into my life and keep... taking. It’s not fair.”
“Taking?  I’m not taking anything, you’re throwing yourself on me!  I don’t know what you want from me, Andy,” you sighed, placing your purse on the sofa.
“The same thing that I’ve always wanted.”
“Maybe it’s not what I want,” you lied through your teeth. “Have you ever thought about that?”
“Then why do you keep coming back?” Andy’s voice cracked. You knew that you were hurting him. And yourself. But there was no other way. 
“Because I love being humiliated, and you are the most embarrassing thing I could possibly be involved with.  Because you already know all my fucked up kinky shit and I’d rather keep the number of people who know that down to a minimum.  Because when I walk home after seeing you I feel fucking sick to my stomach and filthy and stupid and I like it.  Because I love the way that fucking you makes me hate myself.”
“I’m used to you lying to me, but I think now’s a good time for you to stop lying to yourself,” he shouted, the vein in his neck appearing.  You were shocked to realize that you had actually hurt him. Badly.  “Actually, it’s more than overdue. You’ve been doing it for what? Ten years?”
 “Why can���t you just admit to yourself that you want this?” He pointed at the house, and then himself. “That you want me.” His voice was so strained that you felt a little guilty.
“I don’t want you.”
“That’s not the impression I got last night. Or this morning. You were just begging for me.”
Something about arguing with him was so erotic.  Was that a strange thing to think?  It certainly made court a lot more interesting.  And now you found your gaze trailing greedily over his body and as it met his eyes once more, you saw that he knew what you wanted.  That you were falling back into this cycle again.
“If you want me to want you again,” you hissed, “you’re gonna have to make me beg, aren’t you?”
He slammed into you, tossing you down onto the sofa as he slid his own sweatshirt up your body, latching his lips onto your nipple which was embarrassingly already hard.
“You say it like I’ve not been making you beg since you were twenty-two,” he growled, teeth grazing your sensitive skin.
“I can’t seem to remember that.”
“Well I guess it’s time for me to remind you, then,” he swiped a finger across your (already wet) folds and looked at his slick-coated fingers with pride. He had always loved the way you glistened on his skin.
He pushed your back down until you arched it for him.  “Get that ass up, baby.”  You moaned when he slapped your ass quickly, tugging on your hair to arch your back even further.  “Want me to put this cock in you?”
“Please,” you whimpered.
“You can do better than that,” he tutted disappointedly.
You stopped yourself from responding because you knew you would say more than you should.  He leaned down and pressed his lips right against your ear.
“We both know it, just say it,” he encouraged in a low voice.
“Fuck you,” you hissed.  He slipped his hand around your neck and tightened until your face tingled from the loss of blood.
“Don’t say anything until you’re ready to be honest,” he instructed, finally slipping his cock into you— and even though you couldn’t breathe or moan or speak, you managed to react plenty strongly to the feeling anyways.  You were outrageously sore from a long night of fucking and the pain burned just the right way.
He began to move his hips, each time, the base of his cock would brush against your overstimulated clit. Each thrust hitting that one place that made your body quiver. But then it got a bit too much. The stretch and burn of his cock and the hand around your throat.
“Objection!” you yelped your safeword, and instantly he stilled, slipping his arms around you and holding you close.  Tears started to pour against your will.  “I’m sorry,” you whimpered. “I can’t believe that after all this time you still remembered…”
“Never apologize,” he hushed, kissing your shoulder.  “I went too hard on you. And I could never forget a safeword like that,” he laughed softly.
“No, no, I just… I got a little overwhelmed.  It’s not your fault.”
“Do you want a glass of water?” he asked lightly.  “I’ll help you get dressed…”
“No, stay,” you requested.
“Okay,” he nodded, a little surprised.  “Tell me how to help you.”
“Just hold me,” you shivered, “like you used to.  Back when you liked me.”
He chuckled.  “I like you.  Even now; I always have… especially when you didn’t think that I did.”
“We’ll see if you say that in court tomorrow.”
“Almost certainly will not,” he admitted, eliciting a small smile from you.
He pulled you down to lay on his chest as he relaxed into the sofa.  His fingers delicately ran along your skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake, and you let your breathing steady back to normal as your eyes fell shut. 
You looked up at him after a while and appreciated the peaceful look on his face.  It wasn’t something you saw on him often, since you were always pissing him off.  Maybe that was why you liked getting on his nerves so much; because when you saw him like this, happy, you remembered feelings you wanted to forget.  But there was also a part of you that just wanted him to feel something about you when he saw you.  The opposite of love is not hate but indifference… and even if you didn’t want him to love you, and knew that he could never love you again, you couldn’t live with indifference. 
You sat up and he looked at you but you said nothing, just leaning down and kissing him again.  He kissed you back, slipping his hand around the back of your neck to hold you close.  His breathing against your face began to speed up a bit as you straddled him with your legs, rubbing your hips along his again.
“You’re sure you’re okay?” he asked softly as you reached down to guide his cock into you one more time. You closed your eyes briefly.
“I’m sure that I’m not okay,” you responded as you moved your hips down and felt him slip inside you, “but I need you right now.”
He nodded and you sat up to plunge yourself down onto his cock, moaning as his length reached deeper into you than normal from this angle.  His hands gripped your hips tightly, not out of any sense of dominance but simply his reaction to the feeling of you as you began to ride him.  You were slow at first, balancing yourself on his chest, but it wasn’t too long until you were bouncing with abandon, moaning his name over and over while he watched you closely.
Your hand fell to his chest and you felt his heartbeat, strong and steady.  You wished you could be so strong as that.  You wished you could be so stable.  
He sat up suddenly, looking at you with a hint of concern.  He must have seen the fear on your face.  He pulled you closer and you still, instead letting him grind deeper into you as he held your face in his hands.
“So beautiful,” he whispered reverently, kissing your collarbone lightly.
“Andy…” you sighed, another tear falling but for an entirely different reason.
“So perfect,” he continued, kisses trailing to your neck.  He wrapped you in his arms and you both moved together in a way that didn’t feel like what you were used to at all.  Your orgasm came and went with only a stuttered gasp but he felt it and praised you all along the way, made some promises he couldn’t keep, said some things you elected to ignore.  
You fell asleep together and stayed that way well into the afternoon, not having gotten the most effective night’s sleep beforehand.  When you woke up to golden light on your face and a snoring Andy Barber, you gave him a quick, tight hug before you got up, finally recovered your clothes, and grabbed the handle of his door.  Something stopped you, though you couldn’t be sure what, and you looked back to watch him on the couch again.  You found yourself setting your purse down and undressing again, trading the wrinkled suit for that stupid Harvard hoodie, and slipping back under his arm on the couch.  You weren’t very tired anymore so you watched him sleep for a bit, running your fingers through his hair and scratching his scalp.  You remembered him liking that before, you hoped he hadn’t changed his mind.  It was a familiar feeling, safe feeling, one that you hadn’t felt in so long.  You couldn’t think about what would happen tomorrow, what had happened yesterday.  You just let yourself swim in the comfort of him for a little while longer.
(next chapter)
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