#i also think the friend who drove me was seriously considering taking me to the hospital. he saw my shameful little shuffle to my apartment

[soupcrouton]

Aueghhh bad headache last night holy fuck

[hearts401]

I honestly hate how the fandom treats Michael as a hero and I'm seeing posts about it so I feel a liiiittle better talkign about it

my moots are holding back, i can tell. but hes my favorite so im not. and im a little pissed writing this bc. bc i relate to cc a lot. and seeing ppl mischaracterize not only my favorite character but also someone who reminds me of people who fucking suck drives me INSANE.

so psa, im pissed as fuck and i love michael afton.

First off, he killed Evan. That's obvious. Not only was that literall 100% his fault (NOT WILLIAMS IT PISSES ME OFF WHEN PPL MAKE THAT ALL ABOUT WILLIAM SHUT THE FUVCK UP

he was a bully. yeah he was a kid. yeah he was messing with him. Have you considered he was literally. abusive to his brother. i know the fnaf fandom is scared of using that word to describe him but its fucking true. he was abusive. as fuck. that was awful what he did he wasnt just a bully he harassed him and literally locked him in his room. he was fucking horrible.

and yeah, he didnt mean for that to happen, but not only was that stupid as fuck, i hate any interpritation of "he wanted to be like his dad" "his friends coerced him" PLAY FNAF 4. PLAY FNAF 4. FUCKING PLAY FNAF 4 LOOK AT HIS DIALOGUE AND WHAT HE DOES

HE LITERALLY. EGGED IT ON. IT WAS HIS FUCKING IDEA. WHAT PART OF THAT GAVE "he was coerced" THUSHFUDFUDSIOFDUSOFDSIOS

im trying to be normal

Yeah he probably felt like shit after. yeah it probably was some sort of motivator behind his actions. but lets think. lets think.

fnaf 1 and 2 take place before SL, no? So. if thats true. why didnt he burn those down? to "free the souls?" because it was never about the children.

he burned down the fnaf 3 location to get rid of william. it was ALWAYS abotu william. sure he set the kids free but i reeeeaaallyy dont think that was his intention. it was always about william.

in sister location, did he go there out of the kindness of his heart? no he went there because william asked him too. it was ALWAYS about william. and yeah he probably wanted to help liz, he probably really wanted to help her, but based on his actions, was this really for her? or was it for closure

thats something about michael that i put in shitty brother. closure. he didnt actually want to reconcile with his family, he wanted closure on the guilt he felt. is that 100% wrong? no. its normal to want closure, especially after something like that. but also that should not be his goal

did he apologize? yes. he said sorry. he felt bad, sure. but when you kill someone tehy dont come back. evan deserves to never forgive him ever because that was dumb as fuck and HORRIBLE. IT WAS HORRIBLE. ABUSIVE. ILL SAY IT AGAIN

MICHAEL AFTON ABUSED HIS LITTLE BROTHER FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

yeah. abused. say it with me. A-B-U-S-E-D

not just bullied, not just harassed, ABUSED.

ik we're all scared to say it here but its fucking true. say it with ur chest.

this always came back to william. do i thinkk michael is unfeeling and doesnt care about his siblings at all? NO! I think his siblings drove a lot of his actions. but in the end i dont think he always acted with their best interest at heart. or the mci kids'

and the whole "he wanted to be like his dad" i dont fucking care actually. no seriously sit down beside me and tell me that wanting to be like his dad is an excuse for abusing his brother. seriously come closer i wont bite.

tell me how you think that AS A TEENAGER, 100% AWARE OF HIS ACTIONS, that wanting to be like his dad justifies abusing his little brother. his little brother. who as far as we know, never lashed out, never fought back, never did anything to him. tell me how he fucking deserved that

"Michael was just a kid!" so was Evan. So was Elizabeth. So was Cassidy and Charlie and all the kids who died.

tell me how much michael did that didnt revolve around closure and his father. like i get it, he had priorities, but can we please stop acting like he's some angel working for the greater good of everyone.

it feelslike how ppl treat fucking henry. NO HES NOT A GOOD PERSON PLEASE

MICHAEL IS SELFISH HE'S MESSY HE'S STUPID. HE MAKES BAD CHOICES IN FAVOR OF HIMSELF HE PRIORITIZES REVENGE OVER THE GREATER GOOD HE HURTS PEOPLE AND IT MAKES HIM SO MUHC MORE INTERESTING

oh and also in case anybody wants to pull dittophobia out and tell me how mike went thru that trauma

so did evan. and instead of bonding over that trauma, michael harassed him. ABUSED HIM. wording is important. im sorry for repeating myself so much, but nobody ever tells it how it is. it was abuse.

edit: People seem upset by my wording and honestly? fair. i couldve worded this a lot better but i was tired and irritated and one thing i will clarify

i dont care if u dont see adult michael the way i do. i see him as a selfish obsessive guy whos intent is to fix his family, but plenty of people see it differently and thats okay! /gen

but im not taking back anythign i said about teen michael. because i think to do that is unfair to his character and frankly bullshit. i think its bullshit. and i dont care if you disagree. he was a terrible brother and thats that

but adult mike is free real estate idk idrc abt him as much as teen mike.

[saijspellhart]

The One Time I think My Step Dad Saved my Life.

I never liked my mother’s husband, we never got along and I always thought my Mom was too good for him. But it would be a disservice not to acknowledge that I think he saved my life once, and I’ll forever be grateful.

I was 18 at the time, I’d just made a dog suit for an anime con and had decided to wear it for Halloween too. (Not a fursuit in the traditional sense. Imagine you had a giant dog plushie, and you skinned it and wore it like a dog suit. Floppy, baggy, understuffed and everything.) it was my first major sewing project, I was so proud. It turned out exactly how I wanted it.

I took my two little half-brothers trick-or-treating that year. Running around the neighborhood with them collecting candy, having a great time. We made it back to my Mom’s house safely, but I wasn’t going to stay the night. There was supposed to be one more bus passing through the area and I planned to catch it and take the bus system back to my apartment.

The bus stop was just right across the street from my mom’s house, in a moderate neighborhood. Not quiet, but not busy. The street it was on saw quite a bit of traffic. Most of the street lights were well spaced, so the neighborhood got pretty dark at night. It was also late so all the trick-or-treaters had long gone home. I’m actually major scared of the dark, but I sucked it up and waited for the bus, still wearing my dog suit mind you.

For a while it was just me, all by myself. But then a man showed up out of no where a couple blocks down. I could see him whenever he wandered under a street light. I didn’t think much of it, he was pretty far off, it was Halloween, and my Mom’s house was right there. But the man was clearly walking in my direction.

It didn’t become strange until I saw he kept stopping.

Every so often he would stop, sort of loiter around, then start casually walking towards me again. I’m checking my phone for the time at this point, cause the bus should have been here already, but I hadn’t seen it. The man continued moving closer.

I began to realize that the man only moved closer when there wasn’t any traffic. The moment cars would drive down the road is when he stopped to loiter about. Then, when the cars disappeared he would casually walk my way again. I started to get really uneasy. I could sense something was very not right about this.

My Step-Dad happened to pull out of the drive way during all this, off to go party with some of his friends no doubt. He waved at me as he drove by, inevitably passing the strange man farther down the street. At this point the man was about four driveways away. I was seriously considering just darting across the road, going back in my Mom’s house and calling my older brother for a ride. But I was also telling myself I was paranoid and the bus would be there any minute.

The man continued to move closer until he was about two driveways away, and under a streetlight. Cars were passing again, so he’d resumed his loitering. Still no bus. I was wondering how fast I could actually run in a baggy dog suit.

The man had started moving again when a car suddenly pulled up to the curb in front of me. It was my Step-Dad. He had the window rolled down, stank of weed and cigarettes, but he told me to get in the car. At this point it didn’t matter how much I disliked him, I was scared and thankful. I hopped in the car and he drove off, passing the strange man who just stared the entire time, watching us go.

My step-Dad told me he was dropping me off at the bus station in the middle of the city, where I could catch a connecting bus and go home. He said he saw the weird man when he passed the first time, got a weird feeling, so he circled the block to come back and grab me. I thanked him. It was actually really touching that he was concerned about me, I’m not even his kid, and he never raised me.

I caught a bus home from the station, made it home safe. Celebrated the rest of Halloween with my older brother and my friend/roommate. I honestly didn’t dwell anymore on the experience after that.

It wasn’t until a couple days later we heard on the news there had been some assaults in the neighborhoods surrounding my Mom’s house on Halloween night. The gravity of my situation really hit me after that. I could have been one of those assaulted people, or worse.

Ever since I honestly believed my Step-Dad, in all his paranoid, conspiracy theory, people-hating delusions, saved my life that night. He’s dead now, he and my mom died in a car accident years ago. I never actually got to express my appreciation for that night, (aside from the generic, “thanks for the ride.”) We’d never spoken about it. Never talked about the assaults reported in the neighborhood. Never had any meaningful conversation about the situation. I don’t think he ever knew how much I appreciated that small act of concern.

To this day that was one of the most haunting and frightening experiences I’ve ever had. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. But I’ve kept this story to myself for a very long time, and even though my step-Dad is gone now, I wanted someone to hear this story.

Thank you Larry.

[chansrighttiddie]

Chapter One

Pairings: Shy!Lee Know x Idol!Reader

Warnings: Mild Language, Explicit Smut (it's going to be a minute), Fluff, Enemies to Lovers type stuff, typical stuff. I'm bad at warnings okay. English is also not my first language, sorry for grammar and spelling errors.

Summary: You are a solo artist meeting SKZ for the first-time during variety show. All the members treat you warmly, but Minho can't stand to be in the room with you. You meet again to collab later on we see where it takes us! This is part of an ongoing story.

Word Count: 1.9k+

You sat in the back of your manager’s car, fighting the urge to drift off and sleep as she drove you to the studio for today’s schedule. A script had been placed on your lap but it was hard to read because you were tired. Who in their right minds schedules recordings so early in the morning? It was expected of this producer, but you only accepted because of the other guests. It was also a great opportunity to promote your new album and make new friends in the industry.

Gyuri is one of the hosts for this week, meaning you would get to work with your mentor and label mate again. The KARA member was the one person you could rely on before your debut in 2017, being from the same company meant you could see her a lot but it wasn’t the same as actually working together.

It felt like every other year you begged your company to let you collaborate with her on something, anything! They always denied it. Didn’t believe in your argument that the two of you were soulmates.

When your manager proposed this project during your comeback activity meeting, you accepted the moment “Park Gyuri” was mentioned. No other hosts or guests mattered to you at that moment. She really was the best thing to happen to you. Anytime you think about the struggles of your debut, tears would reach your eyes. 

You were in a group lineup for your company, DSP Entertainment, but the plans fell through when the other members left the company a month before. With only three members the company decided not to debut a group, this didn’t sit well with your twenty-year-old self. 

All your hard work and efforts would be thrown down the drain, you even had fans! You couldn’t let them down! After fighting with the company for months they decided you could debut, but as a soloist. If the time came around where they would debut another group, you would be considered as a member. You were nervous and heartbroken. 

You wouldn’t make it, couldn’t. That’s when Gyuri had stepped in, she encouraged you. She helped you train, everyday for three months. When you felt like giving up, Gyuri would sit with you in the practice room and just listen. The two of you would cry and hug it out, then get back up and try again. She really is like a soulmate to you.

“Can you please read the script and not sleep, Y/N?” Your manager’s loud voice made you jump in your seat, you didn’t realize you had fallen asleep. “Seriously, how many times have we been over this?”

“Rest when you can.” You said in a sing-song voice, your eyes were still closed. Your manager was only a year older than you, the two of you got along well. Teasing her was your favorite thing to do. “Unni you said that during the last meeting, I’m just following directions.”

You heard your manager cuss under her breath and turn in the driver’s seat. “I meant… Nevermind, we’ll be there in fifteen minutes. At least look at the plan for today’s set. When we get there you have to rush to get your hair and make-up done…” She took a breath of air then continued, “You have to get a soundpack and mic, meet the group promoting their activities as well, practice with them for the chall–”

“Practice for their dance challenge, promote my new album well, and smile the whole time.” You interrupted. “You told me everything over the phone last night, mentioned it when you woke me up, and reminded me when I got in the car.”

You were wide awake now, making eye contact with your manager in the rear-view mirror. She winced at your comment and nodded, “I’m just nervous, this is your first comeback in two years.”

You had taken up acting, two shows. One of them did really well, it even won you the Best New Actress Award, while the other… Well you don't like to talk about that one. 

“I’m nervous too, we can’t show it though. We’re supposed to be cold-hearted.” That’s a lie, being an extrovert didn’t help with your ‘cold-hearted’ appearance. You talked too much, laughed too much, and smiled too much. “Suck it up.”

Your manager snorted, “Yes, we’re cold-hearted and totally a threat to the music world.”

She had a point, you weren’t that big of an artist in the ‘pop’ scene. However, everyone knows you and your sweet personality. After your debut, many programs would prank you to get a reaction but all you could do was smile. Even if they had ruined your favorite skirt with blue ink. 

Although you aren’t the best dancer, or even a good rapper, you could sing! Many younger artists mention your rich and unique vocals when prompted. When it comes to your dancing… You knew all the basics to it, you could memorize the moves but not really execute them the best. Everyone loved you for it, they found it cute. 

Which doesn’t explain why the concept the company chose for this comeback was a little darker and more focused on a goddess that enjoys mischief. 

Your comeback also has choreography, the main title track is more upbeat than any recent songs you’ve released in the past. Your calves ache just thinking about having to dance again today. Usually you’d sing a soft or deep ballad, minimal movements and lots of stage props. This would be new, you hadn’t really trained this hard in a long time. Still, you were excited to show something new.

It was a bit of a surprise to everyone when the concept trailer released, your family members even teased you knowing you didn’t have a mean bone in your body. How could you manage to 

Your manager pulled into the stage parking area and unlocked the gate, a couple of the guards waved enthusiastically towards you. You resisted the urge to roll the window down and greet them. You’re supposed to be cold today, that’s your concept. You sat back in your seat and pursed your lips.

“Son Mi, do you have my cap?” You felt a little uneasy, maybe it was just now hitting that you actually had to be an idol today. Not that being an actress was much easier, it wasn’t.

“You look fine, Y/N. Don’t be nervous.” 

“Oh, I’m okay.” You laughed it off, you actually are really nervous. Hiding under a hat would make you feel a lot better. “I just want to see Gyuri first.”

“Ha.” She put the car into park. “No.”

Your manager opened and slammed the driver door. You sighed and grabbed your bag, exiting the car as well. 

She was by the back unloading the rest of your things, “So if you enter Stage B3, there should be a staff member to show you hair and make up. I’m gonna check in with the director and the producer.”

You leaned down to grab a couple of bags while nodding, “Can you see if there is a cafe nearby? Or if they are providing coffee. I’m still tired.”

Those bags were heavy. “They should have something for you in the dressing room, something for you to snack on too.”

You waddled towards the large metal door with your bags, leaving Son Mi behind. It's a good thing you skipped leg day yesterday or else you would have collapsed before you even made it to the door. You shifted the bags in your arms and reached for the door handle.

You were really surprised when the door opened for you. You couldn’t really see who opened the door but based on the plain black tee they were wearing, you assumed this was the staff member.

“Thank you, do you mind grabbing one of these? Sorry, it’s heavy.” You stood there in the door frame, in silence. The staff member didn’t move and you noticed them shuffle in place. “Oh it’s okay if not, just lead the way.”

Silence again. Were you mistaken? You backed up to look at the big numbers above the door, B3. You moved forward into the door frame again, “Do you mind if I just enter a little more?”

It was pretty cold outside and your thin sweater wasn’t doing much to keep you warm. Your arm started to shake as the weight from your bags started to get heavier and heavier. Dropping the bags on the ground, you followed.

You were now on your knees in the middle of the entrance, bags everywhere, at the feet of a staff member. How embarrassing.

The staff member jumped into action and bent down to help you up, apologizing over and over. You could finally see the staff member and immediately tell he was not a part of the stage crew. 

“I’m so sorry, I couldn’t see very well. I thought you were a member of the crew!” You laughed embarrassed, “Sorry for assuming.” 

He looked a bit younger than you, he seemed a bit intimidating as you looked up from the floor. You dusted your knees off and bowed to apologize. “Gosh, I knew I should’ve waited for Son Mi.” You muttered to yourself. “Are you part of the cast for today’s show?”

He nodded with a bright smile, now reaching down to pick up your bags. You reached down to help as well but the stranger had already hoisted the two large bags on each arm.”I got them, don’t worry.” 

Feeling guilty you reached over and grabbed a bag, “I can carry them, I just lost my grip and dropped everything.” You smiled, in pain. This bag was the heavier of the two. You extended a hand to grab the other bag but the boy turned to walk away.

He gave a small laugh as he walked away, “Follow me.”

You snatched your personal bag from the ground and quickly followed. Managing to walk in step with him. You adjusted the heavy bag with a quiet grunt and gripped your bag, “I’m Y/N, excited to work with you all today.”

“I’m Jeongin.” He stopped abruptly, “This room.” He gently knocked on the door, the little plaque next to it had your name on it. 

He opened the door and set the bag down in the room, turning to you with a bright smile he laughed. “I think the hair stylist will be in soon, your hair is pretty messy.”

You dropped your bags on the floor and self consciously patted your hair down, “Does it look bad?” Jeongin was a little flustered, such a beautiful woman was in front of him asking if she looked bad.

“No!” He blurted, raking through his brain to find the right words. “You look so pretty! I didn’t mean it like that, your hair is cute.”

Feeling surprised by the younger boy’s comment, you started laughing.  He looked mortified, were you laughing at him? Before he could defend himself the stylist walked in and lightly shoved him out of the doorway, “You boys are done in hair and makeup for the day, PD is looking for you.”

Shooting you a soft glare, not that you could tell with all the tears in your eyes, Jeongin quickly retreated to the room. He had to tell his hyungs about this.

[curatoroffiction]

Vil Meets A Writer

I like the idea of Vil meeting an MC who likes to write.

Because writers are a very driven type of person which is almost the anthesis to everything Vil considers to be a driven person, but I also think there's a fun scenario where one would be exactly the person he needs.

Because writers create stories.

Vil wants to be the star of a story where he can be the hero. Where he gets to stay on the stage and is loved by the audience, and he gets to be one of the 'good guys'.

A good writer could rectify that.

---

I like to imagine Vil and this MC truly only get to knowing each other through time together at Ramshackle. While he's toiling away with his duties working on the performance group, this MC has a side writing project they've been working on for a while. They do their part, but oftentimes they can be seen scribbling stuff down in a notebook, or spending long periods writing in a journal. And if they have it, typing away on a laptop or leaving notes to themselves in their phone.

The behavior sticks out, and at first Vil thinks that they might be taking this very seriously and taking notes on the performances. He asks them about their notes in front of the group and MC just goes ".... Sorry those are a different project."

"What kind of project?"

"... Writing."

"Please do it on your own time."

"With all due respect, if I don't write things as they come to me, I will lose them."

Vil, sighing, shaking his head. "Just don't let it interfere with your work. If you slack even a little, and I'm taking all your notebooks and such away."

---

All went well until MC missed a rehearsal call and Vil found them in Ramshackle on their computer typing furiously away at their work. The performance troupe watch on as Vil begins taking away MC's stuff, only for MC to lose it and tell him he's not responsible for them so he should back off. Vil, pissed at their lack of commitment, coldly finishes taking away their shit and locks it all in a box with a curse that anyone who opens the box before the final rehearsal will find themselves asleep until the next morning.

While the troupe considered his methods brutal, taking pity on MC's situation, none of them can open the box without incurring Vil's wrath anyway.

Which is fine because MC got Grim to open it with a promise of tuna and belly rubs.

---

Vil would wake up to MC on the couch in Ramshackle, tired, surrounded by all their stuff, Grim tucked up next to them as they write away. At this point, he's no longer heat-of-the-moment pissed, and finds himself curious about what drove the MC to go so far for their stuff back. He leans against the back of the couch, looking over their shoulder.

"I see someone's a bit of a criminal."

"It's more criminal to lock up my shit like I'm a toddler."

Ignoring their biting comment, Vil decides to question; "What is it about this stuff that it's worth more than your responsibilities and that you'd be willing to subject a friend to a curse to get it back?"

"I'm writing. Been hit with a really intense new muse, and I've been writing the most amazing story. It's why it takes up so much of my time and thoughts. It's revitalizing though."

"A new muse. What's your muse?"

"You, actually." MC doesn't look up from their work, but they do pause in their typing.

Vil finds himself thoroughly intrigued. And a little nervous, considering how hard he's been pushing everyone. ".. What kind of story is it?"

"It's a story of a protagonist that has to make a lot of tough calls and is strict, but for good reason. I saw your leadership style and it really stood out to me in an interesting way. You're more free-form than people would probably admit, you just want to ensure people under your tutelage have the means for success. You have a good idea of how to get them there, but if they can find it on their own, you'll support it. I liked that approach a lot and thought it'd make for a really inspiring leader in a messed up situation/world. The actual plot is a sci-fi horror. A harsh environment that really helps the personality to shine for its beneficial nature."

Vil is actually... touched. Hearing how he seems through their eyes is like drinking in an opinion he's been long-awaiting for. They don't know his desire to be a hero, they don't know how long he's worked to try to break out of the mold of his typecasting, and yet here they saw a hero character in him already. A hero type that Neige LeBlanche could never fit. He's staring at MC, realizing he knows nothing about them. He knows nothing about who they are and what they're doing here, or even why they became a leader in the first place. "You talk as though you're not a leader yourself."

"I suppose I am. Though, I'm a reluctant leader. Not someone with a passion for it like you. I was thrown into it. Crowley's a mess of a leader. I think calling him a leader is a bit of a stretch of the truth. But you? You're fascinating. Epel hates being under your thumb, but he works twice as hard because of it. And Epel could quit. He could quit and choose not to abide by your rules regardless, but he doesn't, because he sees that strength in you. You practice what you preach so well that even your dissenters respect that if they can't beat you, they should work with you."

Vil finds himself actually almost.. blushing. A warmth in his cheeks tells him that staying here any longer could cause him to lose his composure. He stands up. "You can keep your things, but don't miss anymore practices. Understood?"

"Aye aye, captain." MC just, giving him a soft salute as they return to typing.

---

I just really like the idea of a writer MC writing something and being like "Vil, you'd make for the leader in this really well."

"What of the rest of the cast?"

"There's a bright-eyed optimist who almost gets everyone killed because he thinks he's fighting an injustice, but is actually fighting the only person keeping the place afloat-"

"Who would you see in that part?"

"I have no idea. I don't know actors in this world. Wait. Actually, that Neige guy would probably be great for the part if he can pull off the whole knight in shining armor trope only to have it blow up in his face because this story is supposed to be more real and gritty."

"..... I'll do it."

"Vil it isn't even finished"

"You should have thought about that before sharing. Finish writing it, that's not a request. I want to play this part."

A story where he not only gets to be the hero, but also where Neige could play the part of the villain in a very believable plot??

Where has Writer MC been all his life?

[albertasunrise]

Hey, how's it going? I sent a post with a request, because I thought that explaining it would be too long. Sorry! :)

Skip to the Good Part

Masterlist

Relationship: Frankie Morales x Reader

Warnings: Like AO3 I chose not to give any… this is 18+ so underage peoples. Stay away!! I love love loved this request and I hope I did it justice. 🥰

Fic Requests - Masterlist

The music was loud. 

Why did it have to be so loud? 

The was not his usual scene even if the music was to his taste but Benny and Will had dragged him out for what they'd promised to be a night of fun. This was not what he considered fun. He knew why they were doing it. He'd been wallowing since his girlfriend of four years had upped and left him a few months back. He knew he needed to move on but he had been struggling to do that. He was starting to think there was no hope for him when it came to love. 

He was damaged goods. 

He was an ex-army pilot with little or nothing to show for it. Sure he had a few medals but he also had PTSD and was a recovering coke addict. 

What a catch. 

He sipped on his beer as the Miller brothers talked about Ben's upcoming fights and how Will's wedding plans were coming along. Frankie had tuned out a while ago, choosing to just stare at the torn label on his budweizer.

"Hey, Fish." Ben nudged, trying to get the man's attention "Yo, Catfish." He said a little louder, finally catching the man's attention.

"What?" 

"Curvy Latino chick checking you out," Will stated, motioning with his head and Frankie looked around to see you smiling sweetly at him as you sipped at your drink. 

"She's way to young for me." Frankie scoffed and the boys groaned 

"You're not that old Fish!" Ben argued. 

"Coming from the guy who's in his early thirties." Frankie gibed and Will groaned. 

"You're only two years older than me so does that make me old?" Will asked and Frankie just shook his head. 

"Go on." Ben pushed "It doesn't have to turn into anything serious." 

"I dunno." 

"God, you're lame." Ben mocked and Frankie just gave him the finger before returning to his beer. 

...

"Who do you keep staring at?" Your friend asked as her eyes followed your gaze to a table where three guys were sitting "Oooo, they're hot. Which blonde you got your eye on?" 

"Not the blondes." You said simply, taking a sip of your bud.

"Hat dude?" She asked and you nodded shyly.

"Looks a little old." She said and your brows drew together as you shook your head. 

"I don't think so." 

"Well go speak to him!" She pushed and you simply shook your head again. 

"He won't be interested in me." 

"Why the hell not?" Your friend exclaimed and you sighed. 

"Because he's hot and I'm not... Guys like him don't go for fat girls like me." 

...

"Come on Frank, she's been checking you out all night." Ben drove "She's clearly into you so just go and talk to her." 

"She's got to be like half my age." He scoffed and Ben gave his brother an exasperated look. 

"If she was half your age, she wouldn't be here." Will pointed out "Seriously man what's stopping you? You deserve to have fun." 

"I need another beer." Was all Fish could say before he got up from the table and made his way over to the bar. 

...

This was your chance. You watched him as he got up and walked to the bar and then you noted how your drink had run dry. 

"I'm going to get another drink." You said, smiling at your friend "Another?" 

"I'm good." She said as she waved her almost full bottle at you. 

"Okay. Be right back." You said before making your wave over to the bar and standing next to the man who'd been the object of your desires all evening. 

He was even more gorgeous up close. Soft brown curls that poked out from beneath his hat and a strong jaw that had your mouth watering. Your moment was disturbed when a drunk guy barged into you from behind and you were forced into the man you admired, leading him to spill his drink all over the bar. 

"Shit... Sorry I... The guy pushed me and I-" 

"It's fine." The man assured you as he grabbed a napkin to mop the beer that had spilt onto his hand. 

"Let me get you another." You pleaded "It's the least I can do." 

"Seriously it's..." He stopped in his tracks when he realised who you were. 

Up close you were even prettier than he'd expected and he felt his heart race as looked at you. Suddenly he'd run out of things to say. 

"Please." You pleaded with your big eyes and he found he couldn't say no to you. 

"Sure." He managed to say finally and you grinned at him. 

"Great." You beamed before asking the barman for two more beers, silently psyching yourself up to talk to him again "Can I confess something to you?" 

He just looked at you like a fish out of water and you chuckled before taking that as an invitation to continue. 

"Well, I've been trying to pluck up the courage to come talk to you for most of the night. I don't usually do this sort of thing." 

"Really?" He asked, a little taken aback. 

'Yeah, I uh... Well, you're really hot and-"

"Wanna dance?" He asked and you were shocked by his question. 

"S-sure." You said, picking up your beer and taking a large swig before accepting his hand and heading to the dance floor just as 'Pour some sugar on me' started to blast through the speakers.  

You were then more shocked at how good he was. At first glance, he didn’t seem like the dancing type but then he was pulling you against him and swaying his hips in time with the music, his mouth cemeteries away from your neck. You felt yourself get lost in this moment with him, your body flush against him as he led your movements. Suddenly you felt a wave of confidence flow over you and you turned in his arms, eyes flitting between his, and his lips. 

Then the distance was closed.

His lips were soft and he tasted like the beer he’d been drinking. His moustache was a new feeling for you but one you welcomed as you moaned into the kiss, an ache starting to grow between your thighs. The kiss started to get more passionate and you knew then that you had to have him. Even if it was just for one night. 

Cheering pulled you both from the kiss and you both looked in unison at his two blonde friends cheering the two of you on. 

“Get in there Fishsticks!!” Ben cheered and Frankie rolled his eyes. 

“Fishsticks?” You questioned, smirking at him. 

“My name’s Francisco… or Frankie if you like.” He said, looking at you shyly and you smiled. 

“Nice to meet you, Francisco.” You purred, giving him your own name in return “Would you like to get out of here?… My apartment's only two blocks over.” 

“Shit, really?” He practically panted, eyes darkening as his tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip. 

“Wanna show me what else you can do with these hips?” You asked, surprising yourself with your confidence. 

“Shit.” He groaned before kissing you again and you chuckled against his lips. 

“Take that as a yes?” 

His eager nodding was all you needed. You told him you were going to let your friend know you were leaving and he did the same. Five minutes later you were both sprinting out of the club, stopping every few moments to kiss each other breathless. 

When you finally made it to your apartment, you’d only just made it through the front door before he was on you. His lips were on your neck as his hands travelled over the dips and valleys of your body, pulling musical sounds from you. Normally you'd be conscious of the fact that your stomach wasn't flat and that your thighs were thick but the way he looked at you seemed to wash away all those anxieties. The more skin he revealed, the more ravenous he seemed to be for you. 

Clothes were removed and left haphazardly all over the apartment as the two of you stumbled to your bedroom. You both giggled and moaned as you bumped into things and kissed each other to distraction, collapsing onto your bed. Your heart sped up as he kissed down your body, lavishing your plump breasts and nipples with attention before making his way down to where you wanted him most. 

"Fuck." You groaned as he dove in face first, licking and sucking at your centre as he slipped two thick fingers into your heat. 

He grinned against you as you writhed beneath him, singing his name as you crested. Then you were grabbing at him, desperate to feel him and he was happy to grant it. As he slipped inside of you and swallowed your moans, you both felt complete, like you’d been each other's missing piece all this time. He took it slow at first. The gentle rocking of his hips allows you to adjust to him but before long you’re begging him to fuck you harder. Then he’s fucking you into the mattress and you’re at his mercy. He pulls sounds from you that you’ve never made before and pulls more orgasms from you than you can count. 

Finally, when he’s nearing his own, he switches angles one final time and rubs your clit, eyes stripping you bear with his dark gaze. 

“One more Hermosa.” He purred and that was all it took to have you cumming around him again. Pulling him right along with you. 

Then he collapsed bonelessly onto the bed beside you and you rolled on your side to face him. You gazed at each other for a while, smiling sweetly as you admired one another. 

“Wanna stay?” You asked, grinning at him “I have bacon and make a mean cup of coffee.” 

“Sounds great.” 

~ 

2 weeks later…

“You heard from that chick from the club at all?” Asked Ben over breakfast before stuffing his mouth full of bacon. 

Frankie simply shook his head. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t disappointed that he’d not heard from you but you’d never said it was more than that. The following morning had been just as perfect. You'd cooked him a lovely breakfast and chatted to him as if he'd always been there, it had felt so natural. He'd dared allow himself to think that perhaps something more could happen between the two of you but in reality, he'd shared an incredible night with you and that was all it was to be. 

Was probably for the best.

“You could call her?” Will suggested and Frankie sighed. 

“I don’t have her number. I gave her mine and she said she’d text me.” The man said, unable to hide how dejected he felt “Guess it just meant more to me.” 

“She could still text!” Will said and Frankie shrugged. 

“Yeah maybe.” 

… 

You read and re-read your message over and over and over. It would be so easy to just press send but you were nervous. 

It had been two weeks since you’d shared that amazing night with Frankie. You’d told him you would text him but then work got busy and before you knew it a fortnight had passed. Taking a deep breath, you hovered your thumb over the send icon and pressed it, praying your message would be well received. 

… 

Frankie’s attention was grabbed by his phone lighting up. Knowing it was probably one of the guys he ignored it at first but when it dinged a few hours later, his interest was piqued. It was from a number he didn’t recognise but when he opened the message, his heart sped up. 

Hi 

The message started along with your name. 

I know this is a little late and I’m super sorry. Work got mad and before I knew it… well, anyway, I had an amazing night with you and I was kinda hoping that you’d maybe like to go out for dinner with me sometime? Completely understand if you don’t want to but thought I’d ask. 

He smiled at your message, feeling his heart flutter at it and then he saw the next message you’d sent. 

Message received 

He started to panic then. He definitely wanted to go out to dinner with you but now you were sitting in your apartment thinking the opposite. So he didn’t hesitate to message you back. 

Hi, sorry, I only just saw this! 

He started, trapping his lip between his teeth as he continued his text to you. 

Don’t worry about it, life gets in the way. I would love to go to dinner with you. 

He waited a moment before three little dots appeared in the corner. Smiling as he awaited his reply. 

Hi, shit… wow really? 

Popped up and he smirked at it. 

Sorry about my earlier message. I regretted sending it as soon as I did it. I’m not needy I swear. I’ve just never asked a guy out before and I got all stupid. 

You’re fine. When you free? 

Tomorrow night? 

Perfect 

He was grinning from ear to ear at the knowledge he was going to see you again tomorrow. He’d given up all hope of hearing from you so to see that message from you had given him a boost he didn’t know he needed. He wasn’t sure what would come out of this but he was excited to find out. 

…

You had changed your outfit about six times in the last half an hour. You'd agreed on a time and place with Frankie. A small burger joint you knew close by so you didn't need to dress up in anything fancy. Yet you still wanted to impress him. After that night you'd not been able to stop thinking about how everything you'd done together felt so right. Sure he was older than you but that honestly didn't bother you. You knew it was going to bother your parents but you'd be lying if you said you cared about that. 

An hour later you were making your way to the restaurant, spotting him standing outside. He was looking around nervously and you couldn't help but smile as you checked him out. He'd made an effort too. Smart burgundy shirt and dark jeans that hugged his cute little ass. 

"Hey." You said when you were in earshot of him and he smiled sweetly at you. 

"Hey." He replied before the two of you shared a look, caught in a moment before you both just went for it. 

The kiss was exactly how you'd remembered it. Soft yet firm and you felt yourself melt into it as he pulled you closer. Then it ended and you were both left breathless as he rested his forehead against yours. 

"Missed you too." You chuckled and he grinned at you. 

"Shall we?" He asked as he motioned to the door and you nodded before heading in as he held the door open for you. 

You were both seated in a booth that allowed you to sit together as you talked about your lives. You learned that he was ex-army. That he'd flown helicopters and that he was now flying choppers for a local sky tours company. He seemed to enjoy the work. 

"Still get to fly but I don't get shot at anymore." He joked and you smiled at that. 

You then told him about how you had moved here from Brazil when you were six but you were still fluent in Portuguese. He then told you about his Chilean roots and how he had moved here at a similar age. As the evening went on, you learned that you both shared a lot in common. You liked the same books, movies, music, food... even cleaning brands. Talking to him was the easiest thing in the world and he felt the same about you but there was one thing that was hanging over his head. 

"So, what do you want?" He asked and your brow pulled together in obvious confusion "Like, what are your plans for the future?" 

"Are you asking me if I want this to become something serious?" You pushed and he shrugged. 

"I'm a lot older than you." He stated plainly "You have so much ahead of you. You don't want to waste your time on a washed-up ex-soldier like me." 

"What makes you think that?" 

"I just know." He said sadly and your heart broke for him a little. 

"Francisco." You started, taking his hand "I know I'm young but trust me when I tell you that I want something serious. I've dated and I've been let down and I don't want that anymore. I want something solid and I think that I can have that with you... Well if you want that too." 

"I do." He said, almost too quickly and you smiled at him "I'm ready for it all." 

"Good." You replied with a smile "Me too!" 

...

2 years later...

You weren't sure how you were going to explain this one. As you stared at the two positive pregnancy tests in your hand you could laugh at your situation. 

You and Frankie had dove head first into serious. Within two months of dating you had moved in with him and then a month after that you had discovered you were pregnant with your now one-year-old daughter. He had taken to fatherhood amazingly and he was her favourite, as much as you hated to admit it. Now here you were, pregnant again. 

Now you had always wanted to have more than one kid. You just hoped you'd have a decent age gap between the two of them. Yet here you were... 4 - 5 weeks along with another surprise baby. You just hoped that Frankie would be happy about it. 

Two hours later, Frankie walked through the front door and beamed at the screaming welcome Alicia gave him. 

"Well hello to you, Princesa." He gushed as he pulled her into his arms and placed a loving kiss on her cheek. 

You walked in as she scrunched her face and giggled, grinning at the interaction between them. You made your way over to him and gave him a soft kiss only to roll your eyes when Alicia slapped her hand on your lips in an attempt to part you. 

"No te pongas celosa, niña." (Don’t get jealous, baby girl) He warned and she grinned at him "How was your day baby?" He asked as he followed you into the kitchen and placed Alicia in her highchair. 

"Eventful." You replied, returning your cooking. 

"Makes two of us." He chuckled as he peered over your shoulder to see what you were making "New recipe?" He asked and you nodded. 

"Mhmm." You replied, eyeing the recipe book "Take a look." You said motioning to the book "It sounded nice." 

You watched him from the corner of your eye as he made his way over to the counter where the book sat, opening it to the page and his eyes growing wide. He didn't say anything for a few tense moments and you felt your stomach twist a little with nerves. 

"Baby." He said finally and you turned to face him, noting the test in your hand "Are you..." He trailed off as he studied it a little closer before his eyes finally drifted up to you "Are we pregnant?" 

"Mhmm." You said, chewing your bottom lip as you awaited his reaction. 

You didn't have to wait long. 

He dropped the test on the counter and was on you in three long strides. Kissing you hard as he let out a choked sob. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours and placed a hand on your stomach, grinning like a crazy man as he stroked it with his thumb. 

"So you're okay with this?" You asked and he laughed. 

"I am more than okay with it Hermosa." He sobbed as he pulled his head back to look at you "I am the happiest man alive right now." 

...

This pregnancy came with different stresses. The further along you got, the more worried Frank became about supporting his growing family. He started to take extra shifts and odd jobs, the money helping get you all ready for daughter number two but as time went on he started to struggle. 

So he turned to extreme measures to keep him going. 

Two months before your daughter was due he was grounded. You'd been shocked to learn that he'd been taking coke to keep him going. You weren't sure how to react. On the one hand, you knew he'd just been trying to provide for you all but on the other... He's chosen to coke in order to do that. You had learned from the Millers that it hadn't been the first time Frankie had turned to the white powder. After leaving the forces he'd struggled to reintegrate into society and had chosen to numb that pain with coke. This had been hard to swallow. You had thought you knew all there was to know about the man you loved but it turned out you didn't know him as well as you thought. 

He had pleaded with you to give him another chance. Begged you not to give up on him and despite your mind telling to that it was a bad idea you stuck with him and he made it his mission to be better. He went to AA meetings and cut the cocaine out of his life cold Turkey. Then on the 1st of July... Mia was born. 

She had him wrapped around his little finger from the moment he first saw her and as you'd laid there in that hospital bed, your newborn suckling at your breast he made a vow.

He would never break your trust again. 

He would break that promise two months later. 

Taglist form

Tags: @hayley-the-comet @ajeff855 @pedritomando @supernaturalgirl20 @dihra-vesa @nicolethered @practicalghost @theanothersherlockian @gallowsjoker @little-mrs-morales @sunnshineeexoxo @aliwritesfic @maryfanson @sherala007 @ayrusss @greeneyedblondie44 @elegantduckturtle @jediknight122 @goodgriefitsawildworld @voteforpedro09 @vanered15 @anaaaispunk @prostitute-robot-from-the-future @mishasminion360 @bloobsi @giggly-otter @athalien @mssbridgerton @huitzilinthebudgie3 @samanthacookieone @salome-c @radcollectivesoul @pedrohoe04 @thekohakuriver1 @paintlavillered @ktmadden86 @hotchlover @kirsteng42 @djjarins @balekanemohafe @misscampacyn @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @pedromandoverse @destiny-tsukino @mysun-n-stars @tombraider42017 @littlemisspascal @thatpinkshirt @bison-writes @evyiione @girlofchaos @vanemando15

[ellcrys]

15 questions

Tagged by @itstimetodrew~!! Thanks for the tag!! ☺️

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, I don't think so! I think my parents just went through the list of baby names for girls and settled on Joanna lol.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uhh... I teared up watching one of the episodes of Blue Eye Samurai a couple days ago but the last time I Cried was on my flight back to Boston last Friday rewatching episode three of The Last of Us lmaoo. (I was like SURELY I won't cry on my nth rewatch... #rip to me)

3. Do you have kids?

*Puts on my meme hat* What am I a child bride?

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

Swimming and soccer growing up. I did ballet for like a year or two also when I was like 5. Since graduating college I haven't really done any sports, just working out at the gym pre-pandemic and then at home since the pandemic, although one of my friends is trying to start a pickup soccer group which I'll probs join if it takes off. Do want to get back into swimming again also. That's on my 2024 todo list. I've tried running as a hobby enough times to know that I suck at it and that I hate it lmao.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Does anyone not? lol

6. What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm, probably their outfit; I enjoy seeing people's different styles!

7. What's your eye color?

Brown <3

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings!!

9. Any talents?

Ugh, no?? I can't think of anything lol. Being a procrastinator and the ultimate lazy bum (only half joking). idk man, I used to be proud of my writing and amv skills but I haven't seriously tried to write anything in probably a decade and I don't think I'm ever getting back into making amvs lol. Letting things go/being resilient maybe? I'm at the point in my life where everything is just 'it is what it is', but I think I've always been good at moving on from things tbh. Life's too short to dwell.

10. Where were you born?

Wisconsin of all states lol

11. What are your hobbies?

Nothing creative anymore, that's for sure (#rip). Uh, I love going out and doing things. I'm the furthest thing from a homebody so being trapped at home during the pandemic drove me nuts. Things I do on the regular include visiting independent bookstores, art museums, and seeing shows. I try to travel/see someplace new on the regular, whether that's going out of state/country or walking through a new neighborhood in the Boston area. I love eating, definitely a foodie. I read a lot (more fanfic than actual lit these days whoops) and watch a lot of tv. I also enjoy just walking around and people watching (will frequently walk around the neighborhood/city without any real purpose in mind as I go crazy if I'm cooped up in my apt for too long). I also love sending snail mail and exchange postcards monthly with a friend in London, and send holiday cards/postcards to family/friends when I travel. I guess documenting my interests on Tumblr can also be considered a hobby considering how much time I spend on here lmao.

12. Do you have any pets?

No, but I plan to adopt a cat when I (hopefully) get my own place!

13. How tall are you?

5'4" :')

I'd love another two inches... just two measly inches :')))

14. Favorite subject in school?

Growing up, probably math. I was good at it, and I loved how logical it was. I also really enjoyed chem, probably because it was the most math adjacent science (hilariously though, I hated physics). In college obviously computer science, my major. Though I've always loved my literature classes also.

15. Dream job?

Man I'd love to open and own an independent bookstore/cafe. Dream job for real.

Tagging (if you want!) @lordsardine, @goldshitter, @akechikurusus, @popflythesky, and anyone else who wants to do this!

[spyrkle4]

Ark hcs I have about the survivors: Aberration (part 2)

Sequel to the last post on ab, this one is gonna talk about the grad students n’ stuff (and I am going to be self indulgent af and none of you can stop me)

---

-So fun fact the grad students have their own wiki page and it helps me think about what was going on in ab after everyone bounced (and when I mean everyone I mean everyone left, except their tames)

-Sadly I think Rockwell killed almost-everyone’s tames since he couldn’t get to the survivors, he could at least get the creatures they couldn’t bring with them...

-But not Xiao! Most of the light pets managed to avoid being spared bc they’re smol and it’s easier for them to hide, so yeah he mostly chilled in the ruins of the tek village for a long time until discovered by what’s left of the grad students

-Rockwell was the one who brought the grad students onto aberration, since he took over as overseer he could bring survivors onto the ark now, I think he mostly brought “students with bright minds” for his experiments

-Considering he was influencing some of the grad students, I think he was running experiments by poking through their heads and trying to get them to do what he wanted, basically his first test subjects in controlling other creatures 

-I like to think they all got along a little before Rockwell was messing with them, Trent and Rusty were the kind of people that did dumb dares and Emilia tagged along to feel included 

-Also they had a pet bulbdog with the group that was Emilia’s, they were together until the very end...

(more notes under the cut)

-Boris at first was leader of the group but Trent and Emilia voted Imamu bc he was too bossy and terrible at directions XD

-I actually think Boris is just a grump at first, he’s like “I just want to be a scientist I didn’t ask to be teleported into dinosaur land!” 

-Trent tried apologizing to Rusty multiple times after the incident of making of fun of his accent but at that point Rockwell was whispering words of doubt into his head he never accepted his friend’s apologies 

-Emilia and Rusty went on a date once (”It is not a date, stop it Trent” -Trent said it was bc he’s a troll) at fertile lake where they just talked and went fishing.

-Rusty I think helped Emilia feel confident, she was the anxious member of the group and he helped inspire her to feel brave, he was probably in her thoughts when she sacrificed herself so the others could escape 

-The fall Rusty had just broke his legs or something, he would’ve healed after a long rest, but Boris isn’t exactly a patient guy...

-Emilia and Rusty’s death hit Trent hard, he started taking their situation more seriously and stuck close to Imamu, worried about losing him too, 

-I think it was the combination of Element and Rockwell’s whispers that drove Boris off the deep end, he was still a bit of a grumpy jerk beforehand, but he wouldn’t have killed Rusty and drove Emilia to sacrifice herself if he hadn’t been corrupted at that point

-Trent and Imamu kept the journals of their fallen friends, Trent wanted to burn Boris’ journal after reading it, but Imamu talked him out of it as he thought that the voice that he and Rusty heard must’ve droven him insane, so Trent (reluctantly) put his arson plans on hold

-So when Trent and Imamu were in the ruins of the Tek village, they discovered a little shinehorn sitting by the ruins that was really friendly to them, Trent liked having the little guy around bc it reminded him of Emilia and her bulbdog.

-They found out the shinehorn was named Xiao bc they collected some of the explorer notes and dossiers, it’s also how they first discovered the name of Sir Edmund Rockwell

-Emilia was the one who started the trend of finding explorer notes, thinking they’d have a key to getting out of the Ark if they read the stories of past survivors, but she wasn’t there anymore to find the notes, so the two did their best to try and continue her work 

-Trent and Imamu, when they were the last of the group, became very close since they were in this situation together (Trent 100% called it a bromance, Imamu was very confused bc he did not know what Trent was referencing) 

-Before his defeat at the hands of Rockwell, Imamu first felt sorrow on ab when he discovered the dossier on reapers, and what to do if one... stabs you with their tail, he basically started tearing up and kept repeating “I could’ve saved him... I could’ve saved him” over and over because if he had known about the reapers... Trent would be alive

-Xiao gave Imamu some shinehorn hugs afterwords : (, why am I mean to these kids omg

-I’ve heard some people speculate that Imamu died shortly of his wounds after losing the fight from Rockwell, I think he did survive but his spirit didn’t :’( so he just spent his days by the tek village, with Xiao for company

-If Trent had survived his encounter with the reaper queen, I think he and Imamu would’ve been able to defeat Rockwell and escape aberration 

[taeyamayang]

Congrats on the 1000 followers! You deserve each of them! ❤

Can I request for your Event please?

Character: Satori Tendo

Trope: 6

Exposition/climax: 21

Ending: 4

a/n: hm, yours is an interesting one, anon. this definitely juddered my creative juices but here it goes nothing! oh, and thanks for joining :)

• satori tendo ; human x ghost au

• "You can't always protect me from everything. You can't even leave this house." "Well, would you consider not leaving the house either, for your own safety." "Definitely not."

• major character death

---

your view on life, death, and the line between them changed drastically since you moved in to a prefecture miles away from city, your old home. not because your parent's solution to cut off all your ties from your toxic city-peers worked or that you are finally a self-actualized person ready to take on whatever hurdle they are facingㅡmore like ready to face people and socialize, but rather because of a peculiar someone in your house.

you have found company with a not-so-person person crashing in your place. apparently, you are the only member of the family who can see the supernatural and as it turns out, your new home is haunted... at least by a harmless lanky red-headed boy.

meeting him surprised both you and him. the latter said that he lived with a number of families for almost a decade in this house but none of them can see him. they can sense him which is a bad thing because it drove them away from the house which leaves him alone in this dusty old manor.

and as time goes by you grow fond of him. he has lots of interesting stories about how he lived. he also told you about his hobbies and friends. you learn various things like how he ironically loves the movie ghost and its sountrack unchained melody by the righteous brothers. he told you that he secretly watched it in his room, a few years after its release and was obsessed with it.

and from that point in his life, he never would have guessed that his clock was ticking.

he was murdered at the age of seventeen at the year 1993. unfortunately, up until now he doesn't know who took his life as he was facing the other way when he felt five jabs along his back that happened here at the backyard of the manor. he is sure that he is in good terms with everyone in his school and on top of that he has quite few good friends.

since then he was stuck in this manor, the huge house that used to be his family's. his mother couldn't accept his death so his father was forced to sell the property leaving his ghost behind.

from endless sitting by himself pondering why the hell he is stuck in their house, tendou came up with a theory. he declared to you one afternoon. he thinks that the reason why his soul could not be put to rest is because justice was never served. his death was a cold case. although the case is still considered young, it's about to reach it's 10th year. tendou is is tired of pointlessly existing.

he wants to move on just like everyone else who knew him.

so, with all the effort you can pull off you begin searching for answers. your fascination on crime documentaries play to your advantage in your newest agenda. but tendou is not amused by your idea. to him, the closer you are into finding his killer the greater the risk and danger. he didn't want you to get hurt since unlike him you are alive. you have a future ahead of you.

hence, when he senses that you are leaving the house not for academic purposes. he scrutinizes his eyes at you.

"you can't always protect me from everything. you can't even leave this house." you say as you pack your things inside a small backpack.

"well, would you consider not leaving the house either, for your own safety?" tendou, leaning against the door frame crossing his arms as he glues his eyes at your back.

"definitely not." you quickly respond, hauling the bag over your shoulder.

"hey, let's take this seriously." tendou's voice lowers as he follows you behind.

"i am serious about this!" you turn around to face him only to realize he is a few inch away from you. the cold wisps of air coming from him send shivers down your spine. albeit, he looks at you through his lashes with worried eyes.

"please, i-" as though he was about to reach for your face, he stops mid-air before surrending his arms to the pull of gravity. if he was breathing, he would have dragged a long sigh by now. "i appreciate your effort in helping me find peace but that's just my theory. i don't want you to get hurt. what if i'm wrong? what if you get harmed? what if the killer is two steps ahead of you and they know you're after them? i can't let anything or anyone hurt you."

as you study his dilated eyes, you are tempted to finally give in and just let all your progress go to waste. but you can't, you are one more clue away from knowing who killed him and you can't let this slide. if this is the way to free him, then a day meddling with the devil is worth the shot.

"i'll be home before seven. this will be my last trip, i promise. i have an idea who it is and i just want to confirm my speculations. if anything gets suspicious i will go home right away." you lift your hand as you attempt to hold the side of his face but just as expected, you are welcomed by nothingness. nonethless, you continue. "now, relax those eyebrows and smile at me. i'll be home later, wait for me." with that you leave the manor, turning around for the last time as you give him a smile.

it's past seven and your parents are home from work yet you're still not here. tendou becomes aggitated. you promised and you never break promises. your mother went up to your room, that used to be his, to search for you since you are always at home before they arrive. when she sees that you're not in, she shrugs it off thinking you might be busy with school.

it's quarter to nine in the evening and the main door is still locked shut, unmmoved since your parents' arrival. tendou paces back and forth and your parents begin to worry. your father calls the town police and thankfully they offered to search for you.

ten to eleven in the evening. still, your room is empty. you are not answering to your parents' calls and it's starting to cause them panic. this is unlikely of you and your mother desperately wants to know your whereabouts.

at exactly twelve midnight, raps of knocks are heard from the front door. everyone including tendou shoots up on their feet. your father asks for the person's identity behind the door and a man says it's the police. upon opening the wooden double door, the officer with badges along his chest swallows in air before speaking.

"goodevening ma'am and sir, we have news regarding your child. you might want to sit first because-" the officer was cut off by your mother's scream.

"just say it! i can't wait another second!" your father pulls your mother by her arm, one hand rubbing her back as he calms her down.

"i'm sorry ma'am and sir but your child is found dead of multiple stab wounds in a ditch near the river. the prefecture's head police department is investigating the case." right then, tendou's world shatters into pieces, peering at his hands as he trembles.

what has he done?

masterlist | hq.list | join the event!

[comm-caribou]

Chapter Twelve: The Lost get Found:

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: none (let me know if I missed any!)

————

The gunship lowered enough for him to launch the AT-RT out the back. He drove forward, letting the walker run a few paces as to not eat the ground like he had done in the past.

There was so much chatter in his ear from the Commander and his posse. Safe on the ground, he switched to holocomm, seeing them all practically fighting over themselves to talk.

“When you find her,” Cooper explained, “contact us immediately.”

“Don’t move her if she’s hurt!” Boomerang scolded, “you could cause more damage!”

“He knows that,” Mirage said quietly.

“Just making sure,” Boomerang fretted.

“There’s a lot of unusual wildlife out there,” Cooper continued with the briefing, “you and your squad need to be careful.”

Three more AT-RT joined him, sitting patiently waiting for his okay to move.

“Tracks sent you the coordinates of the area we were,” Coyote said, “best you comb through that there. We also sent Hound the last known location from her now unresponsive comm.”

“Commander, you have anything to add?” Cooper asked him.

As if woken from a trance, Hardwire turned to the holo-comm, and said, “please, just find her, Sergeant.”

“Yes, sir,” he responded, closing the call.

Juliette Trix had been their General for close to three months now. She was their longest running General, and he never met her.

He caught glimpses of her when she first arrived in full armor, but never got the chance to say a word to her before Hound was hurt. Then, they’ve been gone for long while helping Hound with his recovery, and she’s been nowhere since they returned.

“Ready, Digger?” Calico asked.

Digger turned to them, smiling under his ARF issued helmet, “ready as I’ll ever be.”

****

“My jet pack. How could I forget my jet pack?”

As she grumbled to herself, Juliette dragged herself from the indent in the ground where she landed. If it weren’t for her armor, she was certain she’d be dead instead of with a sore, possibly broken leg.

She lost her comm in the fall, and wished she knew where it was so she could call someone.

“Maybe they’ll send Fury,” she said to herself, “good, sweet reliable Fury would come for me. Or Shadow, he’s pretty loyal too. Maybe, Coyote? Definitely, Cosmos. All my precious pilots would come for me. I bet they’re flying around now.”

She put her head down, taking a labored breath.

“I wish someone else was here to talk to.”

****

“Hold.”

Mutt hopped off the back of Hound’s walker, kneeling down to the ground.

“What’s that?” Hound lowered the transport down.

Mutt picked up a mess of metal and wire, “broken communicator. Has a heart etched on the back.”

“That’s her,” Calico chuckled.

“You say that like it’s so obvious,” Zombie remarked.

“Do none of you watch her?” Calico scoffed. “I find her quite entertaining.”

Digger sighed, “and you say that like she’s a side attraction.”

“Aren’t we all?” Calico mused, “I imagine when this war ends, because we don’t have any rights and are considered property, they’ll put us in a zoo.”

Digger rolled his eyes, “can you boys focus?”

“A zoo?” Hound asked Calico.

“Or a museum,” Zombie proposed. “They’ll display our dead bodies and all sorts of war junk for civvies to gawk at!”

“We also could be auctioned off,” Mutt laughed, “for the cheap price of one trillion credits, bring home a clone trooper today.”

They all laughed, except Digger.

He clapped his hands, “cut the morbid jokes. We got to find the General.”

“Sir, yes sir,” they all straightened up.

Mutt climbed back on the back of Hound’s AT-RT.

“You know,” Hound began again, “I hear she’s rich.”

“Hound.” Digger warned.

“I’m just wondering,” Hound said, “do you think she’d buy us? Like clones? If we were up for sale, would she?”

“She’d definitely buy Cosmos,” Calico snickered.

“Maybe just her pilots and a few other friends,” Mutt mused. “Probably not us.”

Digger scanned the ground, “you boys stupid?”

“Rude,” Zombie retorted.

“No, seriously,” Digger continued, “this is the same girl who tracked a trooper across Coruscant to save his life based on a rumor she heard from some gossiping Corries. She wouldn’t have to spend any of her credits because she’d just break us all free.”

He stopped, looking to the ground at something shiny. He lowered his walker, getting off as he got closer.

“What’d you find?” Zombie asked.

Digger picked up a purple stone wrapped in wire, attached to a silver chain. It was in a hole in the ground, the size of a person.

“Calico, you notice everything,” Digger turned to his second in command, “did the General wear a lepidolite necklace?”

“Yup.” Calico nodded, “she’s always fiddling with the thing.”

Digger looked around, “fan out, she’s close.”

****

Her hand frantically pat her chest and around her neck.

My necklace! Where’s my necklace?

She felt a tightness in her throat, and tears welling up as she looked for her necklace. With it gone, she now had nothing but memories of Fang, and they were slowly fading away.

A sob escaped her, as she lowered her head crying.

“Sweetheart, why are you crying?” Fang lowered down beside her, turning her face to him.

She felt silly for crying, but still.

“It’s my buir’s birthday,” she wiped her eyes.

Fang brushed her cheek, “I’m sorry, what can I do for you?”

She thought for a moment, “can we go make a cake?”

“I’m not that good at baking,” he smiled bashfully, “but I’ll try.”

He gently dabbed under her eyes, and kissed away any remaining tears.

****

Mutt and Hound went off together, Digger sent Zombie with Calico, and he went off on his own, holding onto the purple stoned necklace.

“Lepidolite,” he chucked, “a lilac colored stone located on more tropical, warmer planets. Technically a mineral.”

“Thank you for the lovely facts,” Hound said into the comm.

“Pop quiz,” Digger scanned the area, “what are its healing properties?”

“Digger, you’re such a nerd,” Mutt teased.

“Wait, wait!” Zombie exclaimed, “I know this one!”

“Tell us,” Calico hummed.

“It’s on the tip of my tongue,” Zombie continued. “Something balance. It’s the balance of… of…”

“Careful, Zombie,” Mutt laughed, “your brain is starting to smoke.”

“Shush your mouth!” Zombie laughed, “I give up.”

“Emotional balance,” Digger smiled, “it helps with emotional balance.”

After a second, Zombie said, “I knew that.”

“Did you?” Calico teased, “did you really?”

“Wait, something’s moving,” Hound cut in. “We’re checking it out.”

Digger paused, looking back down at the necklace.

I wonder who gave it to her? It looks handmade.

He brought it closer to his visor, admiring the shades and colors.

What an interesting little General we have.

His eye got drawn past the stone, to a shimmer of gray in the middle of a field.

“Found her.” Digger turned his AT-RT, “head to my position.”

“Copy that,” Calico quipped.

****

She lost track of how long it’s been since she fell, and the pain just lingered now.

Hope was dwindling as no gunships flew by.

They’d be looking for General number seven soon, and I’ll be just a memory.

She looked to the stars, thinking of the mural her troops painted. A memorial for their fallen, but it was presented to her like a gift.

Please put my star up. I want to stay with my new family.

Heavy foot steps approached her.

She tiredly turned her head, buir?

Machinery hummed and groaned, then lighter footsteps came closer.

Above her, white armor stood over her.

Fang? It can’t be…

She felt too tired to speak. All she could manage was reaching her hand up to them. Her eyelids felt just as heavy as her limbs, fighting to close on her and pull her into darkness.

They knelt down, taking her hand in their’s as she blacked out.

“Hello, Angel.”

[chelseachilly]

THIS LOVE - chapter seven | that's how you get the girl

pairing: ben chilwell x reader

rating: T

word count: 2.3k

summary: you've been sulking at home for days, mourning your fake relationship and possibly your friendship with ben. little do you know, he's on his way to your flat...

A/N: here is is...the final chapter of this love! 🩵 this story has been so much fun for me to write and you've all been so kind with your feedback :) thank you for sticking with me if you made it this far, and i hope you enjoy this one! not to give anything away...but the chapter title is (very clearly) from how you get the girl by taylor swift (also what perfect timing that i'm finishing this just in time for 1989 tv!!)

previous chapter | view all chapters

-

From the moment you walked away from Ben in the tunnels of Wembley, everything was pretty much terrible. 

You drove straight home and cried your eyes out for the rest of the day and night, feeling like utter rubbish and longing for the comfort of the one person you absolutely can’t talk to about this. 

You could’ve, in theory, called your family or one of your other friends to vent, but it was hard enough admitting your feelings for Ben when Mason practically forced them out of you. You weren’t sure you could bear to say the words out loud - to admit to anyone but yourself that you’re in love with him. 

Days passed and you continued to wallow in your misery, leaving the house only for work. It took three days before you summoned the energy to force yourself to go for a drink with some coworkers, but trying to smile and pretend everything was fine when your heart was completely shattered proved too difficult, and you left after one beer.

The following day, you felt so completely drained of energy when you woke up that you ended up calling Val begging her to take your shift, which she thankfully did without prying too much. You just aren’t ready to open up about everything yet - it’s too painful. Honestly, you can’t imagine a time that it won’t be. 

Normally, when you’re upset over a guy, you cry for a few days, a few weeks at the most, eat a lot of ice cream, and then get over it.

But this isn’t just some guy. This is Ben. He’s your best friend, the most important person in your life, and you may have lost him over your own stupid feelings. 

Which brings you to right now, laying face down on your couch after crying so much that you don’t think you physically can anymore. Your curtains are closed, wanting to shut out the world for as long as you possibly can before facing reality.

There are unanswered texts on your phone from both Ben and Mason. You felt you owed them at least a quick assurance that you were okay - even though you’re not, really - so you forced yourself to respond to Mason once, but you haven’t listened to any of the many voicemails Ben has left. You’ve been doing enough crying, you think hearing his voice right now might send you over the edge.

You also know that they’re in Ibiza on a boys trip, and you know exactly what that means - clubbing, drinking, loads and loads of hot girls. The last thing you want is to hear about Ben’s latest conquests, you’ve purposefully avoided social media so you don’t have to read about them in the Daily Mail. 

You’ve just mustered the energy to get up, wipe your tear-stained cheeks and shuffle over to the kitchen to try to force yourself to eat something when there’s a knock on your door. 

You seriously consider not answering it, figuring it’s probably someone trying to deliver food to the wrong flat - who else would randomly show up at 9pm on a Friday night is beyond you - but when the knocking persists, you begrudgingly walk over and swing it open.

Your mouth falls open when you see who’s waiting for you on the other side.

“Ben?”

Lo and behold, there stands the man you’ve been crying over for five days straight. He looks oddly disheveled, his hair is soaking wet from the rain outside, and he’s here. At your door. Not in Ibiza.

“Y/N,” Ben breathes. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“What are you doing here?” you murmur, and you’re ashamed of how weak your voice sounds after the hours of sobbing. 

It certainly doesn’t go unnoticed by Ben, much to your dismay, as his face falls and he takes a step toward you. When he reaches out to cup your face, you pull away, refusing to allow him to comfort you right now. 

“What’s wrong, love? You look like you’ve been crying-“

“I’m fine, Ben,” you say quickly, worried your voice will falter again if you take too long. “Why aren’t you in Ibiza?”

“I flew back.”

You roll your eyes - even when you’re madly in love with him and feel like bursting into tears at the sight of his face, this boy can still drive you crazy.

“Yeah, I know, but why?”

Ben takes a deep breath, like he’s summoning the courage for something.

“Because the whole time I was there, while the boys were having fun, I was sitting around missing you and wishing you were there,” he says. “And you weren’t answering any of my texts and I saw you out with some guy on your story-"

“He’s a friend,” you say sharply, crossing your arms. “Not that you get to tell me who I can and can’t date while you’re off getting laid by every model at the beach club-"

“I wasn’t getting laid, Y/N, that’s what I’m trying to tell you,” Ben says desperately, taking a step closer and melting all your resolve in the process. “I wasn’t partying, I could barely even eat or sleep, all I could think about was you and how much I wanted to be with you. How I always want to be with you.” 

He reaches up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, his thumb brushing against your cheek, and this time you can’t bring yourself to pull away. 

“I’m sorry I kissed you like that after the game, in front of all those people,” he says, gently dropping his hand from your face. You miss the warmth of his touch immediately.

“I wasn’t upset about the kiss,” you admit quietly, almost shamefully, avoiding his gaze. 

“I know,” Ben says softly. “You were upset about how it happened.“

Your heart skips a beat as you realize what he’s implying, your eyes darting up to meet his bright blue ones.

“Did Mason-"

“No, no,” Ben says with a small, slightly nervous smile. “He just pointed me in the right direction. Turns out everyone else already knew what it took me twenty years to figure out.”

Your legs feel like they’re about to give out, and you have to grip the doorframe for stability as Ben continues to look at you like you’re the most important thing in the world. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he says, his hand over his heart like he’s making an oath, or afraid that it might burst out of his chest, or perhaps both. “I’m in love with you. I’m so sorry that it took me this long to realize it, but I think I’ve been in love with you my whole life. I think that’s why I’ve never wanted to settle down with any other girl, I think my - my heart knew it was waiting for you.”

“Ben,” you breathe, tears now forming in your eyes once again for entirely different reasons. “I love you too. I didn’t realize until I had to pretend to be in love with you, but somewhere along the way I think I realized I...wasn’t pretending anymore.”

Ben’s hand tentatively reaches out to grab your waist, pulling you closer, and you felt a bolt of lightning crash through you as his touch electrifies your entire soul.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” he whispers, now close enough that your noses brush, sending another wave of sparks through your body. 

“I was terrified,” you admit. “I was worried that you wouldn’t feel the same. Although, deep down, I think I was even more scared that you would.” You timidly reach up to run your fingers through his hair, and you see the way his eyes fall shut in contentment. “I can’t lose you, Benji.”

“You’re not gonna lose me, baby,” Ben murmurs, sending goosebumps up your arms with the new term of endearment. “We’ve always figured everything out together before, this isn’t any different. It’s scary for me too, but thankfully I’ve got my best friend by my side.”

You smile, fiddling with the hem of his shirt before looking up at him shyly. “Well, speaking as your best friend, I think it’s my duty to give you some relationship advice.”

“Oh yeah?” Ben grins, squeezing your waist. “Let’s hear it, then.”

“When a girl tells you she loves you back,” you murmur, tilting your head to brush your nose against his. “You should probably kiss her.”

Ben doesn’t have to be told twice - you only see a flash of his blinding smile before he pulls you closer and descends his lips onto yours. It feels like heaven to kiss him, every nerve in your body on fire as your lips mould together perfectly. 

Your arms wrap around his neck, not caring that he’s still wet from the rain or that your door is still wide open for any of your neighbours to see. Your entire world is Ben and his hands on your waist and his mouth on yours and his familiar scent enveloping you. Despite the passion burning inside you, you don’t feel like you’re going to combust any time soon - you just feel warm. You feel protected, content, happy. He’s your safe place, and he always has been. 

Ben deepens the kiss, and you gladly part your lips to allow his tongue entry. You don’t expect the moan that leaves your mouth when he does so, but it only spurs Ben on more, making him tighten his grip on you.

“I love you so much,” he mumbles against your lips between kisses, “so, so much.”

You kiss for a long time, neither willing to break apart for even a moment, until the sound of someone walking down the hall breaks you out of your trance. When you both pull back for a moment, just enough to look at each other, you lock eyes for a few seconds before bursting out into laughter. 

“Holy shit,” you laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. “I can’t believe that just happened.”

“I can’t believe we waited this long,” he confesses, pecking your nose. “I didn’t know kissing someone could feel like that.”

“Me neither,” you breathe, unable to resist leaning in to kiss him again, this time tugging him by the shirt and pulling him fully into your flat. 

When you both find the self-control to pull apart again, you gaze up at him lovingly for a moment before your eyes flit to the large duffel bag and backpack behind him, which you’re noticing for the first time.

“An overnight bag? Thats presumptuous of you, Benjamin,” you tease, raising an eyebrow.

“I came straight from the airport,” he explains, and you can’t help but blush slightly at his urgency to get to you. “But I do hope you’ll let me stay for a while.”

You can stay forever, you think to yourself. You don’t say it out loud, but you’re pretty sure he knows.

“Not sure I’m dressed for a first date,” you giggle, glancing down at your old joggers and t-shirt from uni. 

“First of all, you look insanely beautiful, like always,” Ben says without a hint of doubt. “Second, this doesn’t count as our first date. I’m taking you somewhere nice.”

As he drags his bags into your flat and shuts and locks the door behind him, you shake your head at him with a smile.

“Just because you’re my boyfriend now doesn’t mean I’m gonna start letting you spoil me all the time.”

Your stomach flips for a moment as you realize what word you just said, but judging by the look on Ben’s face and the way he drops his bags to the floor to walk over and kiss you again, it was the right one.

“Babe,” Ben groans lightly as he pulls away from the kiss, your fingers lightly scratching his scalp. “Call me your boyfriend again and I’ll probably buy you a bloody Tesla. Or a boat, or a house, whatever you-“

You smirk, leaning in to kiss him both to shut him up - you think you’re gonna love this new method of doing so - and because you really want to.

Any hope of a witty retort is lost when Ben tugs you impossibly closer and his hand slides underneath your top, making it impossible to think of anything else. 

He walks you backward until you reach the sofa, sitting down and pulling you into his lap so that you’re straddling him.

You’re kissing like the world is about to end, a tangle of limbs and unspoken promises, both of you completely insatiable. When Ben begins to trail his kisses down your neck, sucking gently at your pulse point, and tugs you closer by your hips so you can feel his bulge against your core, you could explode from the pleasure of it all. 

“Bedroom,” you murmur, your fingers tangled in his hair - you’ve dreamed about touching it like this for so long. Touching him like this. “Now.”

 Ben pulls back to look at you, and you half-expect to see that same cocky glint in his eye you’ve see a hundred times before he left the club or a party with some hot girl, but this look is entirely different.

His gaze is intense, but it’s also full of adoration and devotion and, you swear, even a little bit of nervousness, which is totally adorable. 

“Are you sure, Y/N?” he asks in a low voice, running a hand up and down your back and leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake. “I’m happy to wait if you want to take it slow. Whatever you want, baby.”

“I want you, Benji,” you murmur, pecking his lips softly. “I want all of you. I don’t want to wait.”

Ben nods and smiles at you for a brief moment before pulling you into another searing kiss, standing up with your legs still wrapped around his waist and beginning to walk you to the bedroom.

You don’t leave your flat for two days after that, shutting out the outside world completely except for one text Ben sends in the boys group chat - with your permission, of course. 

-

a/n: the end...almost! 💗 i still have an epilogue coming your way, hopefully sometime next week! thank you to everyone for reading, please let me know what you thought of the big confession scene, i hope it was everything you wanted! xx tag list: @captainwans @amandaaa1025 @bbygrlllllll @ncentic @lunamelona @kathb59 @cinderellawithashoe @batmansb1tch @myheartgoesvroom @chillymountsjess @babygirlbenji @delicateearthquakellama @joyfullyswimmingface @xxenia14 @chaotic-taco-collector-blog @chilwellspulisic @maraudersmap123 @evelinapurmale @freekoalakryptonite

[writingwithcolor]

Desexualized Mammy & Strong Black Woman, too busy for “frivolous love”

“Alyse” (Anon Submission) asked:

My science fiction story includes a black woman (Talia) who raises two children that aren’t her own and takes on two young adults as apprentices. One of the children she is raises has Arabic background and was taken into her home upon his father’s death (his mother’s whereabouts are unknown). She was a close friend of his father and the closest thing he had to a relative. The second child has mixed French-Latinx background and was taken in after becoming shipwrecked with no means by which to contact her people. Talia was the first non-hostile individual she encountered and one of the few who would so openly embrace a stranger. Since Talia is Master Medic (the highest medical authority in her community) she is training two apprentices (think residency) and eventually mentors the second child as well. She was once married and passionately in love but lost her husband to illness. In this setting, some technology we take for granted is inaccessible and violence against their people is commonplace. Most have experienced sudden loss. This particular loss was the catalyst that drove Talia into medicine- a desire to protect her loved ones and prevent others from experiencing similar tragedy. She is usually kind (though businesslike) but sometimes succumbs to a frigid, furious depression when, despite all her knowledge and determination, she can’t save someone. 

I worry that her maternal association with the two children (one of whom is an outsider) mires her in the mammy trope. On top of that, she hasn’t pursued romance since the death of her husband. I’ve considered giving her a romantic subplot but there are already so many characters to keep track of. Furthermore, I just can’t see her engaging in the frivolous pursuits of new love when she’s dealing with kids, students, and an extremely taxing career. 

In terms of race and culture in this story, practically every character can trace their ancestry back to populations displaced through war. Even Talia’s second child was shipwrecked during a botched evacuation from a military science lab. The people who live here have been isolated for generations and no longer have a real concept of their ancestry. Cultures have blended, new religions have formed, and many of our familiar racial/ethnic issues are forgotten. However, new and different but equally toxic ones have replaced them. In this way, Talia’s blackness doesn’t carry the same associations in her world as it would in ours. However, readers may still make these associations. Do you see any issues with her character that I could amend? 

So! You have:

A highly educated Black-coded woman (the highest medical authority in the community)

She raises two kids alone 

She also looks after two apprentices

She is widowed (not sure the race of the husband, was he Black?)

Having experienced heartbreaking love, Talia's drive to look after, protect and save people through medicine is a great motivation for the way she is. Her experiencing depression and taking losses seriously is also very human and is dynamic characterization. 

However, such characterization with Black women is prone to brush across several tropes. You have a Black woman who gives and protects, but what does she get in return? Who cares for her? 

Prioritize your Black character’s happiness

"I’ve considered giving her a romantic subplot but there are already so many characters to keep track of. Furthermore, I just can’t see her engaging in the frivolous pursuits of new love when she’s dealing with kids, students, and an extremely taxing career." 

Priorities, priorities. Is love a frivolous pursuit in her eyes, or yours? Because I strongly disagree. You probably don't mean to but you, as the author, having an excuse to NOT give the Black woman romance is showing that you do not think she's worth being loved. TV viewers and stans who are uncomfortable when Black women characters have relationships find similar excuses to explain away not wanting BW in relationships.

"She's too strong and independent for a man/relationship" 

"I liked her better alone." 

"It'll take away from her character."

“A romance doesn’t feel right for her”

These sorts of statements above are grounded in racialized misogyny. 

Relationships do not lessen the woman.

Relationships does not lessen Black women. 

Love

Whether that love is romantic, familial, or friendship, it can come in many forms. Give Talia love. Because Black women characters deserve it! Either one or all! 

Let her have a loyal best friend, a cat, and a girlfriend. Because why not? And not to downplay the love of children to parents, but please provide her love beyond what she gets on a maternal level from the children she looks after. 

The stories that Black women are in today severely lack love for us, so why add to the narrative of Black women being all work and no play, and too [insert excuse here] to be loved? 

Of course, you didn't provide all the details from your story, but I'm not seeing much of a balance from the struggle. She is a caretaker, teacher, doctor (or doctor-like figure). 

Her position and background in itself is okay. It's the Strong Black Woman being presented with seemingly no commentary that strikes me. 

Where is her team to help balance the weight of the world? 

Who takes care of her when she's depressed from another loss? 

What does she get in return from taking an emotional and physical toll to heal her community? 

Do those around her recognize all she does for them and offer their friendship? 

When does she get to relax and turn off the need to be everything for everybody?

Fitting love into a book with many characters

There are many books with several characters to keep track of. People tend to manage. Also, I'm sure some of those characters are in and/or out of relationships. Even stories that couldn’t be classified as romances have relationships of some sort. It’s unrealistic to have a ton of characters and none of them be in relationship(s) of some sort. Not when there’s so many forms of it and many sexualities. 

Friends, frenemies, enemies, romance, affairs.. Relationships make stories (and life) interesting. By no means do I think adding these dynamics harm your tale. And what’s one more for a hard-working Black woman who sacrifices a lot and clearly deserves a shoulder to lean on? And, if you use an existing character to be that friend, family, or lover, then you won’t need to pencil in another character.

For romance specifically - I think a misconception when it comes to including romance in stories is that they have to somehow take over the story. Romance does not have to bombard the plot nor be described in lavish detail. Not every story is a romance and those sort of details aren’t everyone’s style or things they’re comfortable with. A sentence or two establishing relationships does not take away from the story.And how those relationships look and affections expressed will vary based on the characters, sexuality, etc.

Not every character needs to have a deep level of detail. 

“Katie and Lisa, a newly engaged couple, walked into the meeting.”

“Jack and Jamie are a married couple in their 40s.” 

“The two met in college. After two months of blissful courtship, they eloped, eager to start their happily ever afters. Twenty years together, they were still blissfully in love and never too far from one another.”

Sentences like the above are enough for some characters. You don’t always need to put in paragraphs worth of relationship-establishing details or plot. 

When it comes to the characters whose love you would like to highlight, at least a bit, you still don’t have to go over the top.

Use subtle details. 

“As soon as Talia’s back was turned, he gave her a longing look before shaking his head and getting back to the patient.”

“He squeezed her hand before taking hold of the stethoscope.”

“She kissed her wife goodbye before racing out the door.”

“You mean the world to me.” he had said, holding her face. Those words stayed with her all day, making her heavy load light as a sack of feathers.

“She soaked his shirt with her tears and he just held her tight, saying nothing, silently holding her together.”

As for Talia specifically…

Talia having the mindset you described, as love being frivolous and not a priority, is understandable knowing her background (I just don't agree with you as the creator using this as a means to keep her alone. Whether she’s romantically alone or without close friendships). She has lost so much, and continues to experience loss with patients. This can be extremely traumatizing. I gave some examples of being subtle, so perhaps that will help with the burden of feeling a thick subplot of romance doesn’t fit in your story. 

And as Talia doesn’t strike me as someone who would go looking for companionship, what if she stumbles upon it without trying? Is there someone on the medical team that can offer her friendship? Someone who admires her and feels the urge to care for her that she feels the same for, or has pushed feelings down for? What happens when she can’t hold those feelings down anymore?

Takeaway

Talia deserves healthy love, even if she doesn’t believe it or feel she has time for it. That love can come in any and many forms, not necessarily romantically required, although it is a plus. A struggle-ridden novel is balanced by love, support and rest for characters that hold the weight of the world. If you do not, evaluate why you want to write Black characters in these struggle roles without at least a social commentary. 

~Mod Colette

[xoxo-teddybear]

Goodbyes- Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader (ft. Katsumi, yours and Katsuki’s daughter )

Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Bad Father-Daughter relationship, slight SLIGHT SLIGHT (like 0.00000000000001%) fluff, intense kiss cuz Katsuki’s a SLUT

Summary: Years have passed and even so, Bakugou never gave up on you. You or Katsumi. You were both his family. His girls. He needed the both of you. And he will do everything in his power to bring you both back to him, but his now 16 year old daughter doesn’t plan on making it easy for him.

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Pt.1 Pt.2

11 years have passed since you left Katsuki that day. That horrid day. After leaving the house of hell, you went to Mina’s place to see your daughter. You saw her, happy, with her uncles and aunt. Her world was about to change and so you had to give her every ounce of happiness she could possibly get. You decided it would be best for both of you to stay in the welcoming home a little longer.

While continuing Katsumi’s play date, Mina had suggested you and Katsumi stay with her and Kirishima, but you declined. You knew it would be too easy for Katsuki to find you both and you knew he wouldn’t stop trying if he knew you were both at such easy access. And so, after hours and hours of Katsumi having the time of her life, it was time to bring her to her new home. For the time being at least.

After you left the happy couple’s house, you and Katsumi stayed in a hotel for the time being. It was a very nice place. Plenty of other kids for Katsumi to get along with, luxury rooms, and a pool! You both had stayed there for about a month until you found a gorgeous little house where you and Katsumi could call home. Not only was it spacious, luxurious, and all around amazing, if was far, far away from the previous home your shared with your soon-to-be ex husband.

You both had finally moved in, but that was the least of your problems. Like you told Katsuki, you allowed him to be a part of your daughter’s life. You allowed him to take care of her for 2 weeks, and then it was your turn. 2 weeks would pass and it would be his turn once again. You never allowed Katsuki to know where you both where. You kept your information very hidden and made sure your young daughter wasn’t capable of telling her father the new address whenever she was in his custody. You also never allowed Katsuki to pick Katsumi up. You always dropped her off, but never in a vehicle of your own. Can’t risk having him look up and track down your license plate. And if you couldn’t drop her off, you’d have Kirishima or Mina do it.

As time went on Katsumi continued to ask what was going on. Why was her life suddenly so different? She had asked Katsuki before, but he always told her it was a conversation she should have with her mom. When she asked you, you just smiled at her and told her “Things are changing right now, so it’ll just be me and you for a bit. But a Mommy-Daughter play date sounds fun doesn’t it? And it’ll last for a long time~” you said, hinting at what could possibly be the end of Katsumi and Katsuki’s relationship.

Thankfully, Katsumi liked the sound of that. Even though she was a daddy’s girl, she loved her mommy just as much! Of course her head would constantly be filled with thoughts of Katsuki but what can you do? You can’t bring her back to the cheater. Not permanently at least. You just...can’t.

Katsumi wasn’t the only one who was constantly thinking about family. Katsuki also had his face in every screen, every device, every piece of paper that might be able to help him find you. After you left him, he fell into a deep depression. He lost his two girls and it drove him mad. Even though he got to see Katsumi every 2 weeks, he knew that soon, she’d be old enough to be allowed to know what had happened. He was constantly on the lookout for you and where you could possibly be staying and with his friends refusing to help him, he concluded that for this job, he was on his own. He didn’t care. He had to find you again. He was going to bring his family back together.

—

A few years had passed. 6 to be exact. Katsumi was now 11 and she had questions. Why does life have to be like this? How long will the family be separated? Will we ever be together again? Due to all the confusion, Katsumi began to lash out constantly. It was like she was a mini version of her father. She needed answers. She needed to be led out of the dark. She needed to know. And it was time you told her. And boy, did you tell her something.

“Katsumi...your father left..because of me. I’m sorry. I was a horrible wife..and he just couldn’t take it anymore. It was understandable as to why he left..so..don’t be mad at him. Okay?” Y/N told her daughter.

Yup. You lied to her. You lied to your Katsumi but you had your reasons. A girl should think well of her father. Especially when that girl considered her father to be her best friend. So no, you didn’t tell Katsumi that the real reason you were separated was because her father cheated on you. You just couldn’t. Not when you knew Katsuki held the most important relationship in his daughter’s heart.

The relationship between a father and daughter is something irreplaceable. Something special. You couldn’t ruin it for her. So you were okay with her being mad at you, for her blaming you. As long as she was satisfied with her father-daughter “relationship,” that was good enough for you.

However, even though you put the blame on yourself, it didn’t stop Katsumi from being mad at her father too. He should’ve stayed. He should’ve tried to work things out. You both were her parents! You couldn’t even at least try to stay together for the sake of her? After finding out the “truth,” Katsumi did indeed grow resentment towards her dad. You were right in the end, and she no longer wanted to see him. That was fine with you. She could hate him, but as long as she didn’t know he was truly a scum, then that was settling as well.

Anger and fury resided in Katsumi. It bubbled up inside her and for the first 3 years in her teenage life, she was a child straight out of hell. Constantly in trouble, constantly taking out her anger on the world. You couldn’t blame her though, it was Katsuki’s fault she was like this. And you soon realized it was your fault since you lied to her too. Even so, you still didn’t tell her the truth. You opted to allowing Katsumi to express herself but with you and you only.

Katsumi was a good child at heart, but she was just lost in the dark. So when her mother allowed her to take her anger out on her, Katsumi did NOT lay a fist on her mother. Instead, she broke down. She broke down hard. Like she’s been broken all along.

“Was I not a good enough reason for him to stay?!” She sobbed out in anger as tears flowed down her face. You held your daughter as she cried and tore down all her walls she spent years building up. “I understand if your relationship was tough..but I hoped that maybe he would’ve came back to try for me at least. How could he just run away?! I just want my parents together. I just want to be considered! I’m not like other kids! I don’t have a family!!”

“I’m sorry, Katsumi.” You would whisper into her hair as she balled her eyes out. You didn’t expect your rebellious and strong child to be so..torn. You knew she was broken and you tried to help however you could but you never expected a meltdown. You were glad it happened though. After that day, followed a few more breakdowns. It was like Katsumi was opening the gates to allow everything to be bare just for her mother to see.

Her mother. Someone she now fully and completely trusts. Someone she loves. She allowed her mother to see all her cracks and damaged pieces. And thank god she did because now your mother-daughter relationship was better than ever. Katsumi replaced the thoughts of her father with happy memories of you. Instead of her father, her mother became her keeper, her guardian, her protector, her hero.

—

You smile as you look back on the journey you and your daughter traveled on. A happy family of 3, to a sad and confused duo, to a timid and raging two, to finally a content and happy mother and daughter. It’s been one hell of a ride for you, but if it meant reaching Katsumi’s happiness, then you’d happily do it all again.

“G’morning mom!” Katsumi happily said as she walked into the kitchen.

“There’s the beautiful birthday girl!” You happily said as you turned to your 16 year old daughter. Katsumi was no longer harmful towards others. Your once brutal and ruthless bully of a daughter became a sweet, sassy, and fun teenage girl. She was happy now. The sadness and anger finally left...at least, that’s what you thought. And that’s what she thought too. But the inner Katsumi was still in shambles...just..nobody knew that. Not even herself.

Katsumi was quick to jump onto you and give you a hug. She loved you. You became her best friend, her rock. Her protector and hero. It was always you two against the world and Katsumi wouldn’t have it any other way. “Not to be ‘self absorbed’ or anything, but are we doing anything special today?”

“Welll~ I know we haven’t seen them in a few months but I pulled some strings and so! Uncle Kiri, Uncle Denki, Uncle Sero, and of course Auntie Mina will be coming over to celebrate your 16th birthday!” You said with enthusiasm. You watched as your daughter’s jaw drop in happiness as tears of joy began to fill her eyes.

“Seriously?!” She asked with excitement and watched as you nodded your head. She jumped onto you once more and squeezed you tight. “Mom, that’s amazing! Thank you!”

You smiled as your daughter beamed with happiness. It’s been awhile since the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) came to see Katsumi. Everytime they left their homes, Bakugou grew suspicious and assumed they were seeing Katsumi (and you of course), and even though he was right, he couldn’t know that. So to keep your location hidden from Katsuki, they had to stop seeing you and Katsumi for some time. After a few months, they decided it was perfect for them to pop up again on her 16th birthday, a very special time in a young girl’s life.

“Anything for you Sweetie! C’mon, I made your birthday breakfast and then we can get ready for the day. They’ll be here very soon!” You said to your daughter. She nodded and you both took your seats at the island, enjoying the delicious meal.

Growing up, Katsumi did indeed have friends, but they were more like school friends. She only talked to them in an educational environment but outside of school, her best friend was her mother. She was all she needed. Her friends were her aunt and uncles and that’s why she was more than happy to spend her 16th birthday with just them.

—

Katsuki looked at the date. His heart stung in pain as he stared down at the calendar.

“Katsumi’s birthday.....happy birthday Baby Bear.” He said in a broken voice. The same broken voice he had that day you left him. The same broken voice he’s had ever since you left him.

It’s been 11 years since you left. It’s been 5 since Katsumi decided she no longer wanted anything to do with him. Katsuki felt like he lost everything and in a way, he did. Even so, he kept the house the same in hopes that one day you’d return.

Over a decade has passed and Katsuki still holds hope that maybe..maybe if he prays long and hard enough..if he remains hopeful..his world will go back to normal.

Katsuki was so lost in thought that he didn’t even realize his own friends were possibly going to visit you and Katsumi. It wasn’t until he heard his phone ding and looked to see a notification from Denki to the Bakusquad group chat. Denki must’ve realized he texted the wrong chat room because he never sent another text. Coming to that conclusion, Bakugou assumed something was going on and so he got ready to make a quick trip to his best friend’s house to get in the know. This was a stretch considering they never told him anything about you, which he’ll agree is deserved, but regardless he won’t stop trying.

He got ready and once he was done he was right out the door. As he pulled up to the house he noticed not only Kirishima and Mina, he saw Sero and Kaminari. Something was definitely up. He pulled over to the side and just watched. He saw the 4 friends talking and laughing and finally, he saw the gifts. That’s what gave it away. He watched as the friends packed gifts into their cars and once he saw Kirishima bring a cake, that was all the confirmation Katsuki needed. They were going to see you. They knew where you were.

Katsuki stayed hidden as he followed his friends on the road. He stayed a few cars behind and took on a slow pace. Thankfully, they never noticed him. As the ash blonde drove he couldn’t help but feel a little stinging in his chest and butterflies in his belly. He was so excited to see you..see his daughter..his family.

The drive felt like forever and it probably was. Katsuki looked at his location on the map and it was then that he really saw how far you had moved. It hurt his heart realizing how much you really didn’t want to see him but the fact that he was going to reunite with you soon was overcoming any negative thoughts or feelings. Eventually, his friends ahead of him had arrived and of course, Katsuki followed. The blonde parked a little ways off from the house and waited. He figured that seeing him would cause some shock throughout the home. Katsuki didn’t expect you or Katsumi to be happy to see him but he didn’t care. He’s willing to go through whatever to bring you both back. So, instead of going in right away, he allowed you and Katsumi to enjoy yourselves for some time before he went in and crashed the place.

—

“Happy birthday to you~”

“Blow out the candles, sweetie!” You said while holding the cake. Katsumi smiled, took a tiny breath, and took out the small flames. You all clapped for the now 16 year old girl and you placed the cake down. Playful banter and happy talks were discussed all around as you began to cut the cake and pass around slices.

“I can’t believe our little Katsumi’s all grown up!” Kaminari sobbed into Sero’s shoulder. The slender man made a face of disgust as slobber got all over him and pushed the electric blonde off.

“We’re so happy we got to see you today, kid.” Sero said to the smiling little lady.

“I’m really glad I got to see you guys too! You really made this birthday something special. I love you guys! Especially you, Mom. Thanks for everything.” Katsumi said as she walked to you and wrapped her arms around you.

“I’d give the whole world for you Katsumi. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy. Your smile s’all I’ll need.” You said while rubbing soft circles onto her back. You released the hug as chatter grew again.

On the outside, Bakugou was pressed with his back against the door. He was lucky it was pretty late, so no one would take notice of the pro hero snooping on some “random” house. As Bakugou listened in on the party inside, he teared up at the sound of the singing. What you all didn’t know was that on the other side of the door, Bakugou was also singing and wishing his daughter a happy birthday. Although it was Katsumi’s day, Bakugou took her wish, and begged for his family back.

He stayed outside the door for awhile but the sound of his name made his ears perk. “So..how are things with Bakugou?”

—

You rolled your eyes at Mina’s question. “C’mon. Seriously? Like I’d know.” You laughed a little.

“Y/N, I’m being serious. Katsumi’s 16 now. She hasn’t seen Bakugou in 5 years. Don’t you think it’s a little tough on both of them?” Your pink friend asked. You soften your eyes a bit as you looked towards your hands

“....Of course I do, Mina. Katsumi has always been a daddy’s girl.” You said while looking towards your daughter, who was laughing with her uncles. “She loves him...and so do I. But it was her choice to not see him. ....She thinks I don’t know it, but I’m well aware of just how bad Katsuki’s absence is hurting her. She puts up a strong facade, but I’m her mother and I can see through it. She misses him but she’s too hurt by what happened.”

“But still, what about Bakugou? I know what he did was horrible-“

“Extremely.”

“Right. But he’s still my friend. He tells us everything. He’s so broken by what happened and I’m not saying you should forgive him but if Katsumi misses her dad as much as Bakugou misses the both of you, maybe she should consider seeing him again.” Mina mentioned. You couldn’t believe yourself but you honestly began to consider it.

Back with Katsuki, his eyes widened a bit. A small smiled grew on his face and tiny tears of joy filled his eyes. He made a reminder to thank Mina for her recommendation for you. If you agreed to it, he might get his Baby Bear back. ..He might get you back too. However, a sudden voice made his hopes shaky.

—

“No, she shouldn’t.”

You and Mina both looked behind you to see your daughter standing there. You both held shocked expressions as you watched her.

“..Katsumi..you don’t ever think of seeing him again?” You asked as her expression grew a mix of hurt and anger.

“No! Not after what he did to you! What he did to us.” She said. You kicked yourself as you and Mina were reminded of the lie you told your daughter. He did hurt the two of you...just not in the way that she thinks. “If he was lucky, and his reasons were good enough, then maybe, maybe I’d forgive him. And maybe I’d go back to seeing him. But he’s gone and he’s not coming back.”

—

On the other side of the door, Katsuki grew hurt by the memories of what he did. After hearing his daughter’s words, he had enough and finally worked up the courage to knock on the door.

—

“-he’s not coming back.”

*knock* *knock* *knock*

The 3 of you looked to the door and were shocked at the new guest. Nobody else was scheduled to come. Who could it be? You watched as Kirishima went to open it and took notice of his surprised face. He said a few quiet words, nodded, and then took a few steps away from the door. He looked towards you and your daughter and you felt the whole world stop as you all looked to the man in front of you who had just stepped in.

“....Hey.”

“.....Katsuki.” You said with small tears in your eyes. You looked towards your daughter to see a sad and hurt expression on her face as her jaw slightly dropped.

“...Dad.”

—

“So.....you’re back.” You said with a broken and bittersweet voice as you stepped to him. You crossed your arms as a way to hold yourself in comfort and to put on a strong front in front of Katsuki. Only problem was, he was the man you loved and who loved you. You’ve been together since you both were babies. He knows how you truly feel.

Bakugou chuckled a bit as he put his hands in his pockets and stepped towards you. “Thank you, Y/N.”

“For what?” You quickly and sternly asked.

“For keeping my secret. You think my dumbass friends wouldn’t tell me what you did?” He began before he was interrupted.

“Hey! At least these dumbasses know it ain’t cool to crash a party!” The electric dunce said as he took another bite of cake.

“Denki!” The rest of the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) shouted. Bakugou shook his head with a small laugh before continuing.

“Thank you for protecting Katsumi from me. You never once sold me out.” He explained with sad eyes and a hurt smiled. You used your arms to console yourself as you rubbed your sides for warmth. A warmth that only Katsuki could ever help you feel.

“Yeah well...a girl should think well of her father.” You said as you stepped to the side and you both turned to face Katsumi. She held her hands together by the fingers before dropping them and walking to her dad.

“Hi Katsumi.” Katsuki said with a loving, cracked voice. You all watched as Katsumi took small breath before speaking.

“...W-Why are you here? And what do you mean Mom never sold you out? What are you guys talking about?” She asked with her teary eyes.

“..I can answer all of those questions if you talk to me. In private, I’d prefer.” Bakugou said. Katsumi shook her head no before taking a few steps back.

“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” She said.

“Katsumi,” the said girl looked to her mother who called for her. “You should talk to him.”

“What?” The Bakusquad said.

“What?” Katsumi said.

“What?” Bakugou said.

“There’s some things that you need to know.” You turned to Bakugou as you said this part. “Some things that only you can tell her. That you should tell her. .....You both can talk on the patio.”

“Mom, I don’t want to-“

“I’m not asking, Katsumi. I’m telling you. Go talk to your father. There’s something that you should know.” You sternly said to your daughter. She only stared at you for a minute before looking towards Bakugou and walking to the patio. Bakugou looked towards you and saw you nod your head for approval to follow her. Before he left he pulled you in for a hug. As much as you wanted to hate it, you couldn’t. His scent engulfed you and his warmth finally reached you after so many years. You missed him and your mind and body were quick to give in. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held onto you by your waist. He embraced all of you and melted into your soft touch that he so dearly missed.

“Thank you, Y/N......I love you.” He whispered into your neck only for you to hear. You nodded, but he knew you still felt the same way when you squeezed him tighter. He smiled at that, and you both finally released each other before he walked to his daughter who was waiting outside.

He opened the back door to find his daughter waiting at the outdoor table. He took a seat across from her and just smiled. She’s really here. In front of him. He finally got to see not only the love of his life but his precious little girl as well.

“...It’s so good to see you, Baby Bear....you’ve grown so much.” He softly said to her. She looked up with sad, angry eyes as she glared at him.

“....Why are you here, dad?” She said in a hurt tone. Bakugou held a shaky smile as she said that word. Dad. Granted, it was no longer daddy but it was something. He loved it either way. He needed to hear it.

“A lot of reasons. To wish my daughter a happy 16th...to apologize..and explain..to see my daughter..my family-“

“We’re not your family. You left us. You don’t leave family.” Katsumi sternly interrupted.

“Right...‘I left you guys.’ ......Baby Bear-“

“Don’t call me that.”

Ouch. That hurt Katsuki’s heart. Broke it even more than it already was. “...There’s something I have to tell you. Something your mother didn’t. Something she lied to you about..to protect me.”

“What the hell are you talking about? Mom is perfect! And amazing! She would never lie to anyone especially me!” Katsumi pointed out as she raised her voice at her father.

“She really is perfect and amazing...and I was dumb enough to lose her. Katsumi...I know your mom told you that I left you both..but in reality...She..left me.” Bakugou said. It felt like lead fell onto his body as he watched his daughter fall into confusion.

“N-No...no you’re lying!” Katsumi said as she stood up and slammed her hands on the table. Katsuki didn’t flinch as he expected this reaction. “She wouldn’t! She wouldn’t tear apart our family..she..she wouldn’t do that...to..to me.” She said as her voice progressively got softer with each word. “Quit lying and just admit that you left us! That you put me and Mom through hell!” Her voice rose once more. “Was I not enough for you to stay?! What did I do that was wrong?! I thought we were the perfect family! I thought...we were happy. Was I not a good enough reason to stay? You couldn’t even try for me? For your daughter? You didn’t even take my feelings into consideration when you left. You didn’t even think about me, Dad.”

Bakugou couldn’t believe it. Your lie was supposed to protect Katsumi, but instead it installed all these insecurities she now has. His friends had told him Katsumi was finally happy..but he guessed she hid all her thoughts..just like he would. She really was his daughter. “Katsumi...it wasn’t like that.”

“You’re lying!!!” Katsumi screamed to herself as tear drops began to fall.

“Katsumi! It’s been 11 years since your mother left me and 5 since I got to see you!” He said with a hurt voice. “Do you honestly think I would wait this long, spend years to find your new home, and come all the way out here just to lie to you?” He watched as his daughter’s face fell as she realized he wasn’t lying. He watched as her faith in her mother deteriorated. He couldn’t let that happen. “Don’t be mad at her though. Be mad at me. She had every reason to leave.”

“..What did you do?” She asked unbothered. She doesn’t care about anything anymore. She doesn’t think she could get any more hurt. Her best friend and mother lied to her about something so crucial. What could possibly make it worse? Katsuki felt his heart beat all around his body. He grew nervous and his palms grew sweatier than usual.

“...I-..Katsumi..*sigh* ...I’m so sorry, Baby Bear.” He slightly sobbed. Katsumi now grew interested. She couldn’t remember much but from what she could, she doesn’t think she ever saw her father cry. Even in the worst situations, he never broke. He always put up a strong front for the world. For her.

“Dad?...” she asked as she sat up in her chair.

“....Katsumi...your mom left me..because I cheated on her.”

There it was. The truth was finally revealed to Katsumi. Plain and simple. Her E/C eyes popped as angry tears filled them. Hurt. Betrayal. Fury. All those emotions she abandoned years ago all came rushing back through her. She began to shake as her breath grew heavy. Bakugou apologized over and over with his head down. Katsumi felt her palms grow hot as they began to spark. Out of anger, she screamed and hit her father with an explosion. The same explosions she got from him.

She watched as her father flew back a few feet and cringed in slight pain. Her blast wasn’t intended to hurt him completely but was more meant to keep him at a distance. She watched as Bakugou got up from the floor and faced her again. Her tears fell heavy as a shadow casted over her eyes. Screw the distance. She ran to him and began punching his chest with everything she had. Thanks to his training, and Katsumi’s distraught state, Katsuki felt little to no pain. He could only look down in heart break as he watched his daughter become a mess due to his actions.

“H-How could you?!” She said as she continued to hit him. “How could you do that to us?! TO MOM! TO ME!” She said and finally looked to her father, showing him her tears, cherry red rose, and puffy eyes. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU PUT US THROUGH?! Do you have any idea what kind of hell Mom went through?! Mom doesn’t know it but I saw her face! I saw the tear streaks in the mornings, her red, swollen eyes! I saw her sadness behind her happy cover! And not to mention what I did to her! My family broke and I became a little terror. I caused Mom hell. ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, DAD! YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH?! I had to leave my home! I had to move away from my friends! My family! I HAD TO LOSE MY FAMILY! I HAD TO LOSE YOU!!”

Inside the house, the group of friends could hear everything. All the yelling, the shouting. The anger and pain. Y/N had rivers flowing down her face as she covered her sobs with her hand. Her friends settled around her and comforted her through this horrible time. Outside, Bakugou’s face went into a slight shock at his daughter’s last sentence. “W-What?”

“I had to lose you, Dad! You think I don’t remember? You were my best friend. My idol and hero. To me, it never got better than you. ...But you did this? You betrayed Mom. You betrayed me. I love you, Dad, I still do...but I guess you never loved me or Mom.” Katsumi said as she looked down again.

“Katsumi that’s not true. I love both of you with my entire being-“

“So then why’d you do it?” His daughter asked with her voice, laced with pain.

“I was drunk and made a stupid mistake. It’s a day I completely regret because it was the day I tore apart my family and lost everything.” Bakugou said.

“Tch, you didn’t lose anything at all! You still have the house, the money, the fame, the fans. You’re still a pro, you still have everything!” Katsumi shouted.

“I don’t have you or your mother.” Silence grew at the beginning of his confession. “Like I said, you both are my entire being. Yes, I love my job and I’m grateful for everything I’ve earned and accomplished but I’d give it all up in a heartbeat if it meant I’d get to bring you and your mother back home to me. I don’t care about anything else other than the two of you. You haven’t seen me in the past 5 years and in the last 11 years when you did see me when you came over, you never saw my broken side. You never saw how distraught I was. You never saw the hell I went through because I don’t have the two of you, at home, with me.”

Bakugou stepped to his daughter and wrapped his arms around her to hold her. She allowed him to do so and began to silently cry in his chest. She refused to hold him back as her head was still in a cloud of confusion. Does she forgive him? Go back to seeing him? Try to bring her family back together? What to do, what to do.

“I’m sorry for everything I put you through Katsumi. Both you and your mother. I ruined our family and it’s something I’ve regretted for over a decade. But I won’t let you both go. I will do everything in my power to bring our family back together so we can be happy again. And I’m starting here, by telling you the truth.” Bakugou explained. Silence grew once more and Katsumi had finally made her decision.

“Well I suggest you stop trying..’cuz you’re never bringing us back.” Katsumi said as she pushed her father off of her and narrowed her eyes at him. Bakugou stared at his daughter with wide eyes.

“What?” He asked with an exasperated voice.

“You committed the ultimate betrayal. You broke Mom’s heart, betrayed me and her, and broke this family apart. You ruined us. We’ve finally picked ourselves back up and I don’t think we should let the guy who wrecked our world come back into it. ...I’m glad you came and told me the truth..thank you for that..hope you get home safe.” Bakugou was hurt but he understood where she was coming from. He watched as his daughter began to walk away but he wanted to keep her around as long as he could. He knew this probably would be the last time he would get to see her for awhile.

“I’m sorry!” He said with a sob. He watched Katsumi flinch to his sudden booming voice and turn to him. Bakugou looked at his daughter with teary eyes. “You..you turned out great. You’re the best daughter I could ever ask for. Your Mother did a great job at raising you...I just wish I could say the same.”

As Katsumi took in his words, she could feel a heavy weight fly off of her chest. “.....Woah.”

“What?” Bakugou asked.

“...F-For so long, I’ve been mad at the world. For a period of time, I was mad at mom. But for the past 11 years, I always thought I wasn’t good enough. I thought I was a problem..and I was so broken and mad,” Katsumi looked up to her father with tears at the ends of her eyes and a tiny smile. “I-...I’m not mad anymore...thanks to you.”

Katsumi ran back to her dad and wrapped her arms around him. Bakugou was shocked but felt the tears build up again. He wrapped his arms around her and held his daughter tight for as long as she would allow. Time passed and it was clear the both of them were trying to hold onto this father-daughter moment for as long as they could, but Katsumi knew it was time to let go. Before releasing her hold on her father, she allowed herself to say her farewells.

“Goodbye Daddy....I love you.” Was all she said before pulling away from her dad and walking back into the house. Bakugou watched her go and dropped his head as he allowed himself to cry in peace.

When Katsumi entered the house, she was quick to break down again and sob. She ran to her mother who immediately wrapped her arms around her sad daughter. They both held onto each other as Katsumi said her apologies.

“I’m so sorry Mom! There was a time where I blamed you and none of this was your fault. I’m so sorry!” She sobbed and you pulled her back so you could face her.

“It’s okay, Katsumi, it’s okay,” you whispered. “Don’t apologize for anything. None of this was your fault, okay?” Katsumi only nodded as you pulled her in for another hug. The Bakusquad offered to take her back up to her room so she could settle down and you nodded as you allowed your daughter to head to the comfort of her room. The Bakusquad went to help her cheer up and they of course brought the comedic genius, Kaminari, with them.

“Nothing brings more joy in sad times than a goofy uncle!” Kaminari said as the 4 of them walked up the stairs.

“I could name so many more things, Denki. Trust me.” Mina said as she walked along side him. You chuckled at their conversation as they walked up the stairs but soon, your attention was directed to the opening back door. Katsuki walked in with a sad expression but gave a happy glance once he saw you. He walked towards you and you gave him a sad smile.

“So...I guess now she knows.” You said to break the silence.

“Um...yeah..she knows.” Bakugou said as he looked towards the ground. “......Y/N..I’m so sorry,” he said looking back at you. “If I could go back in time and stop myself I would. Because then I would still have my family. My daughter....you. I’d still have you and Katsumi and we’d still be in the same house with another kid a few years younger than Katsumi and then maybe we’d have another on accident because everyone knows I can’t keep my hands to myself when it comes to you,” he joked sadly. You laughed at his fantasy and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have similar thoughts.

“Yeah..just...maybe if things were different.” You said with your sad smile. Bakugou slowly went in to grab your hand and you allowed him as he moved in closer to you.

“I’m sorry, Teddy Bear-“

“Stop saying ‘sorry’ Katsuki,” you said as you threw your head back with your small smile still plastered on. You faced him again before speaking. “I know you’re sorry. But..there’s nothing that’s gonna change with it. Maybe it’s time for you to move on. Time for both of us to move on.”

Bakugou shook his head at the idea. “No. I know myself. I know I’ll never be able to let you both go. I’ll never be able to move on, even if I wanted to. But I am able to respect your wishes. If Katsumi doesn’t want to see me anymore....then I’ll give her what she wants.”

“I’m sorry, Katsuki.” You said in regards to your daughter.

“S’not your fault Teddy Bear. It’s mine, obviously. Just what happens when you’re an idiot.” He said, degrading himself. You giggled at his comment and went in to wrap your arms around his neck.

“Yeah..but you’re always gonna be my idiot.” You said into his neck. Bakugou held you tight and took in your intoxicating scent. He took the time to memorize the warmth you had, the way you smelt, the way you felt. How amazing it was to hold you in his arms. He drilled it all into his mind so he would never forget.

“I’m glad. ....I love you Y/N.” He said into your soft hair.

“......I love you too Katsuki.” You replied back with all the love you could give. You both pulled away to face each other but felt something immediately draw you back in. You pressed against each other closer than before as your lips slowly came in contact.

This was something Bakugou also drilled in. The way you tasted. Your sweet strawberry lips were something he would never forget. Something he could never resist. The kiss slowly grew more passionate and intense as Bakugou bit down on your bottom lip, releasing a very quiet moan from you. Quickly, he slipped his tongue in and you allowed it as you succumbed to him. The kiss was strong and Bakugou began to push you against a wall but when his hands traveled to the hill of your ass, gave it a squeeze, and you released another moan, you decided it was enough.

You pushed on Bakugou’s chest and kept him back a bit. He looked down at you in confusion but when he saw your small smile and little head shake he understood. He smiled down at you with sad eyes as he nodded. His hands returned to your waist and pulled you in for a final hug that you happily returned. He pulled away but not before giving you a sweet peck on your forehead. He finally stepped away from you and walked to the door. You followed him as you escorted him to the exit and with his hand on the knob, he opened it as he looked at you with the same sad smile that mirrored your own.

“Bye Y/N.” He said on the other side of the entrance.

“Bye Katsuki.” You said with your hand on the door. While he pulled on the knob, you lightly shut the door.

You both placed your backs on your own sides of the door and released a breath you both didn’t know you were holding. A heavy feeling finally hopped off your chests as you both looked up. You both knew that you weren’t letting each other go. That’d be impossible and you knew it. It was more of you both accepting the new reality. You loved each other, wholeheartedly and entirely, but this would have to be the end of your story together.

You’re not letting go...this is just goodbye.

[kpopfanfictrash]

Raise the Barre (Epilogue)

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Creative Contributor: @baebae-goodnight​ for the last Raise the Barre moodboard TT she nailed it

Pairing: Jimin / Reader

Rating: 18+ (Smut)

Genre: Enemies to Lovers / Dance Academy!AU

Warnings: sexual content. Dry humping, fingering, hand job, oral (female), breast play, multiple orgasms, Jimin gets turned on by making someone else come, dirty talk. Jimin’s pants are tight.

Word Count: 13,409

Summary: You and Park Jimin have been rivals for as long as you’ve known one another; ever since he tripped you in the front row of your first dance convention. When you graduate from high school and enter Russet Ballet Academy, you tell yourself you’re leaving all past quarrels behind. The main problem with this though, is that your past seems determined not to leave you alone.

Worse still, the obstacles you face while out in the real world might prove more challenging than anything your enemy has to offer.  

“And… more pointe shoes,” you said, opening the box in your lap. “Wow. Thanks, mom and dad.”

Your dad laughed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “You’re welcome, kiddo,” he said, nodding from the couch. “I know Russet gives you some already, but you can never have too many.”

“Out of curiosity.” You glanced at the tree. “Are there any boxes from you which aren’t related to dance?”

“Not related to dance…” Your mom pretended to think. “I don’t understand.”

“Mom!”

She laughed. “I’m kidding! Yes, there are other presents. You just happened to pick all the pointe shoe boxes first.”

Shaking your head, you placed the box aside. You smiled though, warmth in your chest at being home for the holidays. Classes at Russet had ended a week prior and it had been nice for a few days to simply relax. Already though, you found yourself itching to return to the city. It was strange to wake every morning and not head to ballet. It was even stranger to take classes at your old studio, trying to stay in shape before second semester began.

Playing with the string of your sweatpants, you couldn’t help glancing at your phone on the couch. It had been several days since you’d last seen Jimin in person. Oddly enough, the separation had been harder than you’d thought it would be.

Immediately after ending things with Finn, you and Jimin had tried to keep your distance. The pain of your separation had been too fresh to even consider dating someone else but, as time had gone on, you and Jimin had started becoming friends again.

It was hard not to be, with Jimin continuing as your dance partner and classmate. At the end of the semester, you’d had the opportunity to switch partners, but you and Jimin had chosen the status quo. It just made sense this way; you couldn’t think of anyone else you’d trust as much as him.

At first, things between you were strictly professional. You saw him only within the confines of the dance studio but eventually, his presence bled into your normal life. At first, the outings were small. Jimin went to a pregame you also attended. He saw you once at the coffee shop and, instead of running away, he stopped to chat. One time, he walked you back to your dorm.

When the month became December, you found your outlook improving. Most of November had been spent wallowing in your dorm, but the holiday season brought with it endless activities. The very first weekend of the month, a bunch of your Russet friends decided to go ice skating and you’d ended up tagging along.

The biggest problem had been you’d never ice skated before. Noelle had been patient, skating backwards in front of you and dragging you around the rink. Jimin had done the same thing for Hoseok, who was in a similar predicament to yours, and at some point, they swapped partners and left you skating with Jimin.

When he’d taken over for Noelle, your stomach had swooped. Hands touching, he’d led you gently around the edge and the world had seemed to still. It had been the first time you’d felt anything stir outside of your break-up. Whatever hurt and distance had sprung between you, it seemed something had survived between you and Jimin.

Nose red, Jimin had smiled as he skated backwards. “It’s easy,” he’d told you. “You just swivel, Y/N. In and out, in and out. Got it?”

“Um, no!” you’d yelped, nearly crashing to the ice when Jimin let go of your hands.

He’d laughed, catching you easily and skating like that for a while. Eventually, Jimin had helped you off the rink and gotten hot chocolate, which you insisted on buying. Payback, you said, for the impromptu skating lessons.

That day had been a turning point for you both. Throughout the month prior, you’d texted sporadically but after, you seemed to talk every day.

Jimin even offered to drive you home from Russet, given the fact that your hometowns were so close together. After much hemming and hawing, you’d eventually taken him up on the offer. The savings it gave your bleeding bank account were well-worth the potential discomfort.

This had led to both the best and worst twenty-four hours of your life.

Best, because Jimin was an excellent road trip companion. He let you choose the music, laughed at all your dumb jokes, and agreed to play the road trip games you suggested. You’d already made a firm rule not to compare Jimin to any past boyfriends but couldn’t help but note this as an improvement over anyone prior.

The sole reason the twenty-four hours were also painful was because you stopped at a hotel halfway through. It was either this or drive until 3:00 AM, so you chose the smarter option and rested for the night. You and Jimin bought separate bedrooms, but they’d ended up next to one another, so you’d been forced to spend a sleepless night imagining Jimin separated from you only by a thin sheet of plywood.

You had told yourself this was silly. At Russet, Jimin hadn’t been much further away, but something about the closeness in the hotel made you nervous. It was infinitely easier to forget about boundaries when you were separated by only a car console for hours at a time. Infinitely easier to forget the rules when you were outside of Russet, cocooned by his car and the snow.

You couldn’t help but think about the one kiss you’d shared.

That had only been a taste, barely a teaser, but the memory kept you awake for more nights than it probably should have. You couldn’t help but wonder what it’d be like to kiss Jimin again, under different circumstances.

Groaning, you’d covered your face with a pillow that night and tried your best to sleep. It hadn’t really worked, and you’d shown up at the car the next morning with dark shadows beneath your eyes.

Forcing yourself back to the present, you glanced away from your phone and focused on the tree – only to see its screen light up in your peripheral. Grabbing your phone, you realized Jimin had texted. Stifling a smile, you scrolled through the conversation until you found his last message.

Jimin: MERRY CHRISTMAS! [10:23 AM]

Jimin: 

Y/N: oh my god everything’s so... coordinated lol how long did that tree take to set up?  [10:24 AM]

Y/N: and merry Christmas 😊  [10:24 AM]

Jimin: not long at all. I just googled ‘christmas trees’ and that was the first one I found  [10:24 AM]

Y/N: ha ha hilarious  [10:25 AM]

Y/N: so, what are the Park family plans for the day?  [10:25 AM]

Jimin: the usual. Opening presents, going to my grandparents later for dinner. What about you?  [10:25 AM]

Y/N: same, minus the grandparents. We usually have a pretty low-key day  [10:26 AM]

Jimin: sounds nice  [10:26 AM]

Jimin: what’s your favorite present so far  [10:27 AM]

Y/N: 

Jimin: LOL  [10:30 AM]

Jimin: how many of them did you get? I’ve gotten two new dance bags and seven pairs of black leggings. It’s like our parents have forgotten we do anything else  [10:31 AM]

Y/N: no new dance belts? 😈  [10:32 AM]

Jimin: Y/N, I’m shocked  [10:35 AM]

Jimin: mind out of the gutter. Stop thinking about my junk  [10:35 AM]

Y/N: as your dance partner, I have a vested interest in your junk. What if it breaks free in the middle of practice?  [10:38 AM]

Jimin: the more delicate ladies would faint, I imagine  [10:41 AM]

Jimin: and probably Paulo  [10:41 AM]

Y/N: lmao  [10:43 AM]

Y/N: but seriously, I hope you get presents other than dance gear  [10:43 AM]

Jimin: back at you haha  [10:47 AM]

Y/N: I can’t help but notice you didn’t get me, your dance partner, a Christmas gift though  [10:50 AM]

Jimin: was the drive home not enough?  [10:50 AM]

Y/N: oh, shoot. You’re right! You did get me a Christmas gift  [10:51 AM]

Y/N: I’m the one who’s been remiss  [10:51 AM]

Jimin: don’t forget about my housewarming gift, too  [10:52 AM]

You smiled, sitting back on the sofa. Jimin was lucky enough to be moving off campus second semester. He, Hoseok and Alex Wong were moving into an apartment not far from Paulo’s. You and Noelle had decided to stay in Grace Hall, but you’d talked about moving someplace else next year.

Jimin was heading back early to move into his new place, so you’d need a different ride on your return trip to Russet. Still, you were looking forward to Jimin’s apartment hosting parties in the new year.

Y/N: don’t get greedy on me now, Park  [10:54 AM]

“Who’re you texting?”

Jerking your head up from the screen, you nearly dropped your phone. From the couch opposite, your mom gave you a knowing look.

“No one,” you said hastily, setting your phone aside.

“Oh, really?” She glanced with your dad. “No one wouldn’t happen to have dark hair, his own car and excellent table manners, would he?”

Immediately, you felt your face heat.

When Jimin drove you home before Christmas, your parents had insisted on feeding him before he continued to Harleigh Heights. This had led to the weirdest double date of your life – which was, in fact, not a date – including you, Jimin and your parents for dinner. Luckily, your parents had been great and Jimin hadn’t cared, but you’d been endlessly mortified for your first date with Jimin to have included your parents.

Not that you’d called it a date. When Jimin had left that night, you’d brushed it aside and he’d simply gone along with it. After Jimin had left, you’d gone to your room and wondered what the hell you were doing. It was clear you still liked Jimin and wanted to be more than just friends. Still, something continued to hold you back.

You weren’t sure when it was considered appropriate to move on. The line seemed fuzzy, so you hadn’t dared cross it and Jimin hadn’t asked. You got the feeling you needed to be the one to make the first move – which made sense. You’d been the one who asked for more time. You’d told Jimin you’d say when you were ready.

Any next steps would have to come from you.

It had been weird to go home and not see Finn. His house was only fifteen minutes away from yours – you’d driven past it on your way to the grocery store last week. Still, seeing his home hadn’t caused the pain you’d expected. It was strange not to see him, but more like you’d forgotten something you needed to do, as opposed to missing his actual presence.

If you were being honest, Finn had crossed your mind less and less lately. Possibly because you’d been falling out of love with him long before you’d broken up in November.

Still, it would be unfair to jump into something before you were ready. You’d already hurt Jimin once this past fall and were determined not to do so again. No matter how good things had been lately between you, you didn’t want to make the mistake of dating Jimin too soon.

Despite this, things had become flirtier between you as of late. Exhibit A: casual text conversations about Park Jimin’s junk.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said lightly.

Your dad laughed as he stood from the couch. “Alright, then,” he said, grabbing another gift. “How about you open this one next?”

Accepting the thin package he handed over, you frowned. The box wasn’t large and, shaking it slowly, you heard no sliding inside.

“I swear,” you said as you began to undo the bow. “If you wrapped your passport photo again, dad...”

Laughing, he settled back on the couch by your mom. “It’s not that, I promise.”

Grumbling, you opened the box and immediately froze. Staring at the paper inside, you slowly looked up. “Is this… is this what I think it is?”

“It’s a plane flight,” your mom said with a smile. “I know we’re supposed to drive you back on the third, but we thought you might want to celebrate New Year’s with your friends.”

“But…” Speechless, you returned to the box. “We always hang out together on New Year’s Eve.”

“I know,” said your dad. “But maybe it’s time to start some new traditions, kiddo.”

With that, he stood and took his mug to the kitchen. Sensing he wasn’t needed for this conversation any longer, he began washing dishes and to prepare breakfast. Once he was gone, your mom moved to your couch and settled beside you.

“I… this is too much,” you said, immediately backpedaling.

“It’s not.”

“Well…” Hesitant, you considered the possibilities. “I guess Ari will be in the city for New Year’s Eve. Maybe Noelle, too. She mentioned she might go back early.”

Gently, your mom smiled. “That’s great if you want to hang out with them, but… didn’t Jimin mention going back before New Year’s?”

Startled, you glanced up. You were surprised she’d remembered. Jimin had mentioned it briefly at dinner last week – he’d said he was moving off campus, which was why he’d needed to return home to pack.

“I – he might have,” you said cautiously.

“I see.” She paused. “I just… I don’t want you feeling like you need to hold yourself back, honey.”

“What do you mean by that?”

Your mom glanced meaningfully at your phone. “I’m glad you’re taking time to yourself,” she said slowly. “It’s important to know who you are and what you want. But also – don’t feel like you need to follow someone else’s timeline when it comes to moving on.”

“I know, but…” You trailed off. “We only broke up in November.”

She shrugged. “Only you know when you’re ready, honey. I just don’t want you to keep punishing yourself for something that’s over. You’re allowed to be happy, even if you’ve messed up in the past.”

Swallowing, you glanced again at the gift. The plane ticket was for the day before New Year’s Eve. Plucking it from the box, you sat back on the couch.

“But…” you said lowly. “Mom, it’s only been two months.”

“And are you still in love with Finn?”

“No.”

“And did you learn anything from what happened this fall?”

“I… Yes. A lot.”

“Good.” Reaching out, she squeezed your hand. “Learn the lessons you need to learn, and then move on. Self-flagellation isn’t productive, Y/N.”

You nodded, still uncertain about what she was saying. Her words made sense, but everything she was saying uncovered a dormant fear. You were scared. Scared of hurting someone else, scared of being hurt by someone else in return. Your last relationship had ended so badly, it was hard to convince yourself it might be worth it to try again.

Finally, you turned to face her on the couch. “Does it ever get any easier?” you asked. “This fear of being hurt… does it ever go away?”

Something sad passed over her face. “Yes and no,” she said, pulling back her hand. “You’ll never be as innocent as you were in your first love. There’s something special about loving someone and never having been hurt before. Once you’ve gone through that kind of pain, you aren’t the same after. But… it does get easier. And better. You’ll know more about how to support this time, instead of tearing down. How to make a love stronger, instead of hanging on.”

Something about this speech gave you comfort, and you slowly nodded. Again, what she said made sense but if there was one thing you’d learned from the fall, it was no matter how great the advice was, it was impossible to take if you weren’t ready to hear it.

You continued wondering if the risk would be worth it. No matter how much you felt for Jimin, you couldn’t help but remember how you’d felt breaking up with Finn. You hadn’t been in love with him at that point and it had still been so painful. It was terrifying to imagine loving someone again and having things end the same way.

Your mom was right, though. You couldn’t keep punishing yourself for something you couldn’t change. There were several ways you could move on from here. The main question to ask yourself was whether you wanted Jimin in the picture.

“Alright,” you said softly. “Thanks, mom.”

“Anytime.” Smiling, she stood and dusted off her pants. “I’m going to see if your dad needs help making breakfast. Don’t be too long, now!”

You nodded, watching her go, and then glanced at the ticket. Your mom’s words continued to run through your mind and after a moment, you picked up your phone.

Jimin had texted back.

Jimin: I would never!  [10:57 AM]

Y/N: hey, so  [11:01 AM]

Y/N: I did get one non-dance gift this year. A plane flight the day before New Year’s Eve  [11:02 AM]

Jimin: oh, wow! That was really nice of your parents  [11:03 AM]

Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes. When you opened them, you found yourself newly determined.

Y/N: when do you get back again?  [11:03 AM]

His ellipses started, then stopped, then started again.

Jimin: December 28th  [11:04 AM] 

Y/N: what are your New Year’s Eve plans?  [11:04 AM]

For a moment, he didn’t respond, and you felt your heart catch. Maybe you’d misread things. Maybe Jimin had moved on and didn’t care about you anymore. Maybe he didn’t want you to tell him you were ready.

Jimin: I’m free 😊  [11:05 AM]

Jimin: want to be my New Year’s Eve date?  [11:05 AM]

Smiling ear to ear, you responded.

Y/N: yes. Please  [11:06 AM]

On the actual day of New Year’s Eve, you found yourself stressed beyond belief. Standing in front of the mirror of your dorm room, you adjusted your dress and worried over the hemline. Jimin had arranged to meet you around 7:00 PM and it was dangerously close to 6:55.

“Is the dress too short?” you asked, turning a little to face Noelle. “It is New Year’s Eve in the city. Should I wear pants, or something? Will I be cold?”

Noelle considered, then shrugged. “Just drink more. Problem solved!”

Snorting, you turned back to the mirror. Nervously, you smoothed down the front of your dress. You’d bought it at an after-Christmas sale and had fallen instantly in love. It had seemed perfect at the time, but now you were having second thoughts about the thin straps and tight bodice.

“Alright, so Y/N.” Noelle changed the subject. “Here’s the plan. Are you listening?”

Hiding a smile, you adjusted an earring. “Listening.”

“Good. Okay, so Ari and I will be at a party uptown. If the date goes badly, just say the word and we’ll call you a cab. You can be ringing in the new year with us within the hour.”

“Perfect,” you said. “It’s good to have a back-up.”

“It is.” Noelle paused. “Not that I think you’ll need this, of course.”

“Well, you never know.”

“Please.” She snorted. “What’s Jimin going to do? Be too charming? Too respectful of boundaries? Wear pants that show off his ass a little too much?”

“Noelle!”

She laughed, coming to a stop alongside you. Noelle wore a sparkly dress which made her skin glow, although this may have been the glitter dusted over her shoulders. Looking at herself in the mirror, she fluffed her hair.

“Seriously,” she said, meeting your gaze. “You’re going to be fine.”

“I know, I know.” Shaking out your arms, you forced yourself to exhale. “I’m just nervous, that’s all. It’s been a long time since I went on a first date.”

Noelle considered. “That’s true. Allow me to give you some dating tips, then.”

Laughing, you turned around and sat on the futon. “By all means.”

“Alright – number one.” Noelle removed lipstick from her purse. “Don’t order anything with garlic. I know, that sucks because garlic is everything, but no one wants to make out while they have garlic breath. Rule number two!”

“Whoa, whoa,” you said. “Who said anything about making out?”

Noelle gave you a pointed look. “Just in case it should happen…”

Shaking your head, you sunk back on the futon, but you knew she was right. Tonight was New Year’s Eve, after all. Ideally, you’d like to do more than kiss Jimin, but this seemed like too much of a jinx to say out loud.

Mentally, you agreed to the ‘no garlic’ rule.

“What else?” you prompted.

“Let’s see.” Noelle began to reapply her lipstick. “Relax.”

“What?”

Glancing at you in the mirror, she raised both brows. “I can see your shoulders tensing from here, babe. Just relax, okay? Tonight will be fine. You’re just hanging out with Jimin. You’ve done that before.”

“I know,” you groaned, lowering your face to your hands. “For some reason though, I’m very aware of the ‘date’ aspect of tonight. I don’t know why.”

When you looked up, Noelle gave you a sympathetic look, but before she could say more there came a knock at the door. Half-standing, you moved to open it, but Noelle shooed you back.

“Rule number three,” she said as she crossed the room. “Never answer the door for your own date.”

“What?” you laughed, although you sat back down on the futon.

Grabbing the handle, Noelle pulled open the door. Blocking you from view, she leaned her shoulder against the frame.

“Password?”

“What?” came Jimin’s voice, sounding confused.

“That’s correct!” Noelle stepped aside.

As you stood, you saw Jimin for the first time. He wore a pea coat over his outfit, his dark hair pushed back from his face in a devastating manner. When he saw you, Jimin froze, and you saw his eyes widen.

Silently, you congratulated yourself on having picked the right outfit. His gaze slowly trailed your body, lingering in places which made your cheeks heat. When he returned to your face, he slowly exhaled.

“Hey,” he said. “You… you look beautiful.”

Smiling back, you found yourself at a loss for words. “So do you.”

Jimin grinned and you stood there, smiling at each other like idiots until Noelle cleared her throat.

“Well,” she said, side-stepping Jimin to grab her coat. “I’m going to head over to Ari’s. You kids be safe, okay?”

“We will,” you laughed.

Noelle left in a flurry of kisses and glitter, waving goodbye as she stepped out the door. Jimin turned to face you once she was gone, offering a smile.

“Are you ready to go?” he asked. “I brought you these.”

From behind his back, he pulled out pink peonies, which made you gasp. They were your favorites, a little limp from the cold, but still beautiful. Taking them gently from him, you turned them over in your hands.

“They’re wonderful,” you said happily. “Thank you.”

Jimin smiled. “I’m glad you like them.”

Glancing around, you found a clean glass near the sink and filled this with water. Arranging the peonies on your desk, you took a step back and cocked your head. You’d always thought the idea of flowers on dates was kind of cheesy, but now that you’d experienced it in person, it seemed unimaginably sweet.

“There,” you said, turning back. “All set.”

Jimin smiled at this, then glanced at your bare arms. “You’re going to be cold without a coat,” he said. “That’d be a bad way to start off the new year.”

“Oh – duh,” you said, hurrying towards your wardrobe.

Pulling a coat out, you slipped this over your dress and buttoned the front. As you left the room, you turned off the lights and shut the door behind you. Jimin walked with you down the hall, continually glancing your way from the corner of his eyes.

You felt oddly shy, despite this being Jimin beside you. Jimin, who you’d known since you were teenagers. Jimin, who’d been both the utter bane of your existence, along with the single person you trusted most in the world. He’d tossed you up in the air and caught you no question and somehow, this felt like the most daring thing you’d ever done.

It was strange to walk beside him, out on a date whose future held a large question mark. Excitement and uncertainty warred in your stomach, which only seemed to exacerbate the situation. You felt as though you stood on the edge of a precipice, staring into a ravine with no discernable bottom.

As you left the building, snowflakes swirled in the sky up above and you looked up in surprise.

“Oh,” you exhaled, breath frosting before you. “I didn’t realize it was snowing!”

“Yeah.” Jimin grinned, tilting back his head. “Snow is my favorite weather, actually.”

“The wet and the cold does it that much for you, huh, Park?”

“That, and the romance of it all.”

Your smile softened a little as you fell into step alongside him. The snow continued to drift as you walked, melting as soon as it touched the pavement.

“So, where are we going?” you wondered, glancing at him. “You said you’d tell me once you picked me up and I’ve got news for you, Jimin. I’m here. I’ve been picked up.”

“Right, sure.” He shoved both hands in his pockets. “I made a reservation at this restaurant around the corner. The food’s really good so I hope you’ll like it.”

“I’m sure I will.”

“Huh.” Jimin paused. “That was easy.”

You shrugged. “I’m just excited for tonight. That’s all.”

His gaze softened a little when he glanced at you. “Me, too.”

Smiling, you continued to walk alongside him. New Year’s Eve in the city was a grand affair. The sidewalks were still lit with holiday lights, people hurrying past in brightly colored coats. Privately, you were glad Jimin had made a reservation at a restaurant instead of trying to brave a club or a bar. You’d heard horror stories from people who paid extravagantly to get into a club, only to spend the entire night waiting in line at the bar.

Turning the corner, you saw the restaurant Jimin had chosen and brightened. It was one you’d walked past several times and always wanted to try but had never found time.

Jimin held open the door as you entered. The inside still had their holiday decorations up, garland strung across every surface with tiny, white fairy lights hung up above. Everyone who was dining wore formal attire, laughing and chatting in the glow of the fireplace. The food smelled amazing and immediately, your mouth watered.

Joining the line at the hostess stand, you waited for the couple before you to leave and then Jimin stepped up.

“Park,” he told her. “Party of two.”

The hostess smiled, nodding as she flipped through her notebook. “One moment, please.” The longer she looked though, the more her face fell. After a moment, she glanced up. “Park, you said?”

“Yes.” Jimin nodded. “P-a-r-k.”

The woman nodded, flipping through her notebook again as though the name might magically appear.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, glancing up again. “There seems to be some kind of mistake. I don’t have you listed as a reservation.”

Jimin’s expression faltered. “Can you look again?” he asked, leaning forward.

The hostess nodded, running her finger down the numbered rows. “I can’t find you anywhere. Do you remember who you spoke with on the phone?”

“Rebecca.”

“Oh.” Her face immediately fell. “Rebecca left the restaurant last week. It seems a few reservations slipped through in the transition. Is there… well, before I do that – let me see what I can do,” she blurted out, turning around to rush into the restaurant.

Jimin watched her disappear and you saw his expression tighten.

Silence fell between you as you adjusted your coat. Jimin looked stressed and you weren’t sure what you should do about it. Frantically, you tried to remember times he’d been stressed during class, but before you could do or say anything, the hostess returned.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, looking harried. “The restaurant is completely booked up. I was trying to see if we could squeeze you in, but there’s just no room. I’m so sorry. Normally, only one person does the reservations, but we’ve been so busy lately...”

“It’s fine,” you said, jumping in. The poor woman looked like she was about to burst into tears. “Please, don’t worry about it. We’ll figure something out.”

Jimin glanced at you, surprised, and then nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed, returning to the hostess. “Thank you so much for your help – I appreciate you trying. We actually have a back-up reservation somewhere else, so don’t worry. We’ll come back another time!”

“Oh, really?” Her entire face brightened. “That’s so good to hear. New Year’s Eve, and all. Thank you for being understanding!”

“Yes, busy night,” Jimin said with a smile. “Take care of yourself!”

The woman nodded, seeming grateful when you stepped out of line. Jimin followed your footsteps, heading towards the door and then came to a stop. Slowly, he exhaled.

“So,” you said, turning to face him. “Where are these back-up reservations?”

Jimin winced and met your gaze. “I have none,” he admitted. “She just looked so sad. I wanted to put her out of her misery.”

“Wait.” Piecing this together, you paused. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” he said miserably. “I only made reservations here and that was super lucky, considering most places in the city have been booked for weeks. I don’t have any back-up plans.”

For a moment, you could only stare. “So, you said all that just so that poor hostess wouldn’t worry about a mistake her restaurant made?”

“I – well, yeah.”

You stared another moment, then started to laugh. It started out small but grew until eventually, you were wiping tears of mirth from your eyes.

Jimin watched you laugh, seeming thoroughly confused. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s just…” Shaking your head, you paused to catch your breath. “You’re unreal. Most people would be super stressed about New Year’s Eve plans falling through, but here you are lying to make a hostess’ night better.”

He blinked, still uncertain. “I’m… sorry about that.”

“Don’t apologize!” you insisted as you straightened. “It’s… wonderful,” you said to him shyly. “I like that about you.”

Slowly, his expression changed. “I really don’t have other plans, though,” he admitted. “I wasn’t lying about that. And I am stressed about my reservation falling through. I wanted this night to be perfect.”

The sweetness of this made your heart start to melt and newly determined, you nodded.

“We can fix this,” you said. “We’ll just go somewhere else.”

“Like where?”

“Like...” You paused. “We could hang out at my dorm. Or at your apartment! One of our kitchens has to be free, right? We could make dinner and hang out, watch the ball drop.”

“We could go to my place,” said Jimin slowly. “Hoseok and Alex are at a New Year’s Eve party uptown. We’d have the kitchen to ourselves.”

“Perfect,” you said. “Let’s go there.”

“I should warn you, though – I can only really cook one thing.”

“Spaghetti-o’s?”

“Okay, two things.”

You laughed. “So, what’s the first thing?”

“A pasta dish they taught us in Senior Foods class. But it’s nothing fancy.”

“Perfect.” You shrugged. “That will go nicely with my contribution of store-bought bread and olive oil.”

Jimin started to grin. “Alright, then, it’s settled. Let’s go to my place.”

You smiled when he opened the door, following him onto the sidewalk. Jimin’s new apartment was a few blocks away, but time passed quickly with him beside you. Oddly enough, the mishap at the restaurant seemed to have cleared some of the lingering awkwardness.

Noelle had been right, you realized – you had nothing to worry about while you were with Jimin.

He talked while you walked, detailing the ongoing fight at his apartment about some posters Hoseok wanted to hang. This segued into the general ridiculousness of New Year’s Eve – a topic you wholeheartedly agreed with.

“It’s stressful,” Jimin complained as you walked. “Everyone’s always asking about your resolution, you need to find someone to kiss at midnight, and there’s that super awkward moment with the countdown and your date…”

You laughed, grabbing a basket as you entered the grocery store. Jimin had suggested you stop by, since he didn’t have much food at his place.

“Doesn’t the countdown make it easier?” you joked. “It really dumbs the whole process down. Fool-proof.”

“Well, sure,” Jimin said. “But then you end up staring awkwardly at someone for ten seconds while you slowly lean forward and wonder when you should blink.”

Laughing, you reached on tiptoe for a loaf of bread. “Alright, you got me there,” you admitted. “I’ve never had a proper New Year’s Eve, anyways. I’ve always been dating someone and then, it’s just kind of assumed you’ll kiss. None of the magic you see in the movies.”

Jimin nodded. “Most of that’s just movie magic, though. You aren’t missing much – trust me.”

“I don’t know,” you said as you turned the next corner. “The anticipation sounds kind of nice. Wondering if someone will kiss you back, if they’re thinking about you the same way you are…”

Jimin made a humming noise, low in his throat.

Coming to a stop, he reached overhead to grab some pasta. Putting this in your basket, Jimin casually brushed your arm as you met his faze. Fighting back a shiver, you tried to remember what you’d been saying.

Giving a smile, Jimin continued forward and kept shopping. You stared after him a moment before your gaze dropped to his ass. Inhaling quickly, you remembered Noelle’s comment about Jimin’s tight pants. She hadn’t been wrong about that. Hurrying along, you quickly caught up.

Grabbing another jar, Jimin placed this in the basket. When he caught your eye again, he grinned, his hair falling forward. The sight made your heart flip-flop in your chest.

As you entered the check-out line, Jimin came to a stop alongside you. His gaze traveled the store, eyes widening when he glanced over your shoulder.

“What’s that?” Jimin gasped.

Startled, you turned. “What’s – hey!” you blurted when he took your basket.

Grinning widely, Jimin placed the food before the cashier. “Too slow.”

“Jimin, come on,” you said, slightly flustered. “I can pay. I –”

“You can pay next time, if you want.”

This shut you up and you stared at him a moment before you stepped forward.

“There’s… going to be a next time?” you said.

Jimin glanced in your direction. “If you want there to be.”

“I do,” you said softly, and he smiled.

Taking another step forward, he pulled out his wallet to pay and you let him – this time, anyways. Outside, it seemed to have grown colder since your arrival and you shivered as you exited the shop. Noticing this, Jimin immediately undid his scarf from around his neck.

“Here,” he said, handing it over. “I don’t need this.”

“But then you’ll be cold,” you pointed out, accepting it anyways.

“I’ll jog in place to keep warm.”

“… With me walking beside you?”

“Yep.”

You laughed, even more so when Jimin began to demonstrate. He jogged for a few steps, then slowed to a walk.

“Changed my mind,” he said with a wince. “I’d rather be cold.”

You laughed, cheeks starting to hurt from both this and the wind. Jimin’s apartment wasn’t far, although it did turn out to be a third-floor walk-up. This left you slightly winded when you arrived at his place, to which Jimin shrugged and said the rent had been cheap.

Opening his front door, he led the way into – boxes. Tons of them, although most of the furniture had been set up around them. Jimin fumbled for a light, flicking this on and setting down the groceries.

“Most of the boxes are Alex’s,” he sighed, looking around. “Hoseok and I have a secret deal we’re going to unpack him ourselves if he doesn’t do it by Monday.”

“That doesn’t sound like much of a detriment to Alex.”

“I never said what we planned on doing with his things once we unpacked.”

You laughed, undoing your coat to set aside. Glancing around, you saw Jimin was right. Most of the boxes were scrawled in the same handwriting. Beyond them, you saw the living room had been mostly set up with a couch and TV.

To your right lay the kitchen, in which Jimin was already unloading the groceries. Beyond him was a hallway, through which you assumed were their bedrooms and bathrooms. Wandering back to Jimin, you realized he was staring.

“What?” you said, coming to a stop. “Did I spill something on my dress in the store?”

“No,” Jimin murmured, shaking his head. “I just… I know I said this before, but you really do look incredible.”

“Oh.”

Looking at him, you felt your face growing hot. Jimin smiled and ducked his head, resumed pulling things out of the bag. Stepping from your shoes to place in the hall, you returned to the kitchen and pulled out a stool.

Sitting down, you propped your chin in your hand. “Aren’t you going to take off your coat?”

Glancing down, Jimin blinked. “Oh,” he laughed, undoing the buttons. “I forgot I was wearing it.”

You smiled, but this quickly disappeared when you saw what he was wearing. Jimin had worn a dark blazer and trousers, paired with a paisley shirt and black boots. He looked ridiculously good and again, Noelle’s comment about his ass came to mind.

She’d been correct – his pants were well-shaped and well-formed.

After removing both coat and shoes, Jimin returned to the kitchen and pushed a hand through his hair. You watched him get to work, leaning forward a bit when he began to dice vegetables. Immediately, your brows raised. It seemed Jimin had undersold his skills in the kitchen.

When you said as much, he laughed.

“Maybe a little,” Jimin said. As he pushed veggies from the cutting board, the pan began to sizzle. “It’s all part of my master plan. Set expectations low, then over-deliver.”

“It’s working,” you said with a laugh. “You seem pretty damn impressive to me.”

Jimin’s cheeks reddened. “You’re just saying that.”

“Why would I lie?”

“I seem to remember some shocking texts about my junk and dancer’s belts. You could just be after my body, Y/N.”

“I – that’s not!”

He looked up and grinned. “Kidding.”

Flustered, you blurted, “That wasn’t nice!”

Jimin laughed. “I’m sorry.”

You huffed, waiting a minute before you continued. “You do look really good right now, though,” you said softly.

He looked up, eyes wide. As much as Jimin said he enjoyed being liked, it seemed to throw him for a loop whenever you said you liked him. It made you pause, mulling over this for a minute.

“You seem surprised,” you said quietly. “Whenever I say things like that, you always look surprised.”

“Well…” Jimin hesitated. “I just think… there’s been a lot of times where I never thought this would happen. It feels kind of unreal have you here. In my kitchen. On a date.”

“Times after November?”

Jimin paused.

Your brow furrowed. “Before then?”

Opening the pasta, Jimin added this to the pot. He stared into the steam, slowly exhaling before he looked up.

“Let’s just say I’ve wanted this for a while,” he admitted.

“What? But you hated me before Russet.”

“I…” Jimin trailed off. “Kind of. It’s complicated.”

When he failed to elaborate and returned to his cooking, your eyebrows shot up.

“Uh, no,” you laughed. “You can’t just say that and not explain what you mean. What are you talking about?”

Jimin winced as he set down his spoon. “Okay,” he said, gripping the counter. “I guess what I’m saying is I never really hated you. Not truly.”

“You didn’t.”

“No.” He spoke flatly.

“But…” Confused, you searched his face. “You’ve hated me ever since we met, Jimin. That first weekend at NUVO dance competition. We were both called out to demonstrate and you tripped me!”

“Well, maybe that’s not exactly what happened.”

“What are you talking about?”

Jimin released a low breath. “Okay, so here’s the thing. That weekend happened a little differently from my perspective.”

“How so?”

“We were both called out to demonstrate,” he said, repeating your words. “But I hadn’t seen you before then. When we both reached center and I turned and saw you – I froze. I couldn’t remember how to act. Every thought I’d ever had just… flew out of my head.”

You stared at him, speechless.

“I didn’t know what to do,” Jimin continued softly. “I’d never felt like that before. When you started to dance, it only got worse. I’d never seen someone dance like you did. That’s why I entered the combination late. That’s why I was in the wrong spot at the wrong time and that’s why I accidentally tripped you. I was… well, I was distracted.”

“By me,” you whispered. “You were distracted by… me?”

“Yeah.”

“So,” you said, breath catching. “This entire time, you haven’t really hated me?”

“Ah, I don’t know about that.” Jimin rubbed the back of his neck. “You could be really infuriating,” he said with a laugh. “There were times when you genuinely pissed me off. I meant it when I said I wanted to win against you. But also… I don’t know. I never really forgot the first time I saw you.”

“Oh,” you whispered, unsure what you were feeling.

It made your head spin to hear this different version of events. Jimin hadn’t hated you – at least, not in the same way you had. He hadn’t been the one to make the first move after all. You had when you’d decided not to listen to his apology.

“Oh my god,” you groaned, burying your face in your hands.

“Hey – what’s wrong?”

Dropping his spoon to the counter, Jimin came around and stood beside you. Keeping your head down, you refused to look up until Jimin touched your arm.

“I just,” you exhaled, turning to face him. “It was my fault. This entire time, I thought you hated me and that’s why I hated you. But instead, I just decided to hate you – and for what?”

Jimin’s upper lip twitched. “I wasn’t entirely blameless, you know. I was such a little shit at that age. I wouldn’t have believed me, either.”

“You tried to apologize, though!”

“Hey.” Gently, he gripped your elbows. “If it makes you feel any better, I did trip people just to get to the front. I was an ass. It’s why that Jungkook guy hates me. I started dancing later in life, so I was really hung up on proving myself.”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t true,” you told him. “You didn’t trip me on purpose, and if I’d only been less stubborn –”

“Whoa, hey.” Jimin smiled. “You weren’t the only stubborn one. Maybe it started off as a misunderstanding, but I didn’t really fight it. You were my competition as much as I was yours.”

“I guess,” you said quietly. “I just… I feel like I wasted so much time hating you. Maybe we could’ve even been friends.”

His gaze sparked. “Just friends?” he asked with a quirk of his brow.

“Jimin,” you groaned, but started to smile.

“Listen.” Expression softening, Jimin moved closer. “Even if I had decided to explain all this in high school, would you have believed me?”

“Probably not.”

“Exactly. I was a dick back then.” He nodded. “Remember that one time I lied and told you the awards ceremony had been pushed back an hour?”

Sitting up straighter, you glared. “Oh, I remember. I showed up after they’d already taken the photo for Top Junior solos.”

Jimin grinned. “Or the time I put an out of order sign on the women's restroom after your solo at BRAVO, so you had to run all the way across the auditorium?”

“That was you!” you blurted out, wide-eyed. “No one would believe me when I said it was! Every girl was so pissed off at you that weekend.”

“Which is exactly why I could never admit it was me!”

In disbelief, you shook your head. “You did all of that just to get back at me?”

Jimin’s smile disappeared. “Hey, you weren’t innocent either,” he argued. “Remember the time you spilled an entire water bottle next to my bag so that when I sat down, my ass got all wet?”

Devious, you smiled. “Honestly, there was kind of an ulterior motive there. As much as I hated you, your ass looks great in damp sweats.”

Jimin’s jaw dropped a little.

Managing to shut this, he took a casual step forward. “Is that what you thought?” he murmured, barely able to conceal the thickness in his voice.

“I… may have noticed a few things about you.”

When he placed a hand next to you on the counter, your breath hitched in response. Jimin repeated this with his other hand, bringing his body a step closer to yours.

Hesitant, his gaze roamed your face. “What else did you notice?”

“I…” you exhaled and glanced at his lips.

The air between you could have been cut with a knife, heated for a different reason than the stove beside you. Which – eyes widening, you glanced over.

“Shit!” you blurted. “Jimin, the pasta!”

Startled, he looked in the same direction as you and realized the water was boiling. Rushing away, Jimin entered the kitchen and turned down the burner. Now that you were separated by a solid counter, you felt somewhat dazed when you glanced up and saw him.

Meeting your gaze, Jimin came to a stop. “Anyways,” he said softly. “Now, you know. I didn’t trip you on purpose. I never really hated you. And I’m incredibly glad you’re here tonight.”

Watching him speak, something warm bloomed in your chest.

“Me, too,” you whispered.

Smiling, Jimin returned to the pasta and you settled back on the stool. Delicious scents soon filled the kitchen and you realized how truly hungry you were. You hadn’t eaten much at lunch in preparation and by now, you were famished.

It wasn’t long before Jimin placed pasta onto plates, adding the bread you’d cut up on the side. He brought these to his table, disappearing briefly to return with two candles.

“Oo,” you said as you took a seat. “Fancy.”

Jimin lit the one closest to you with a flourish. “We aim to please, here at Park Jimin’s Fine Eating and Dining.”

“Is that the name of your restaurant?”

“It is.”

“And you’re set on that decision?”

“I decided on a whim, but I have no regrets,” Jimin said, taking a seat across from you. “Now, eat before you piss off the chef and he takes back your food.”

Laughing, you dug into the pasta before you. It was delicious and, after the very first bite, you sighed in appreciation. Apparently, Jimin had truly set the bar low. Conversation began to flow, any lingering tension disappeared after talk of your past.

It was the oddest thing. You’d heard stories from friends about other first dates. They worried about how to behave, what to wear, or what to say to their date – but none of these worries seemed to exist for you in the moment. You’d been so concerned before the night began, but now that you were here, all these worries seemed to fly out the window.

You’d thought you’d spend the entire night comparing. Comparing Jimin to your last relationship, comparing Jimin as a date to Jimin as a friend, but instead, it felt like natural progression. It wasn’t a matter of comparing Jimin to anyone else, but rather simply enjoying where the night led.

After dinner, you insisted on helping clean because Jimin had cooked and bought the food. Donning rubber gloves over your dress, you stood at the sink and began to wash dishes. Jimin laughed as he joined, pulling on gloves to dry the dishes beside you. Once this was done, he suggested watching a movie before the ball dropped.

Collapsing onto the sofa, you adjusted your dress and scanned the room. The posters Jimin had bemoaned were now hung over the TV – you wondered if Hoseok had managed to somehow sneak them past his roommates. Small touches here and there made you think of Jimin.

A game he’d mentioned was out on the coffee table and a blanket which smelled like him was draped over a chair. Pulling this towards you, you wrapped it around yourself as Jimin left the kitchen.

Holding two glasses of wine, he paused when he saw you.

“What?” you said, glancing down.

“Nothing.” Jimin cleared his throat. “Are you cold?”

“A little,” you admitted, tugged his blanket closer.

“Shoot.” Jimin frowned. “The heat’s been weird since we moved in. I’m not sure how to fix – oh!” Setting the glasses down, he rushed towards the hall. “Do you want a sweatshirt?” he called.

“Yes, please!”

Jimin reappeared moments later, a navy sweatshirt in hand. Handing this over, he settled beside you on the sofa. He’d ditched his blazer and now, Jimin was dressed in only the paisley shirt and slacks.

Pulling his sweatshirt overhead, you somehow managed to get stuck right away. It was hard not to, with your hair and the dress, trying not to flash him while you kept your legs crossed.

After a moment of watching your undignified struggling, Jimin cleared his throat.

“Need help?”

“Yes, please,” you said weakly.

Jimin laughed, helping you free and once the hoodie was settled, you sighed and leaned back. Glancing sideways at Jimin, you found him already looking at you.

“What do you want to watch?” you asked.

Jimin blinked, then glanced at the TV. “Hm,” he mused, grabbing the remote. “We could watch the ball drop and enjoy the fact that we’re sitting inside, not standing in the freezing cold without any bathrooms.”

“I know!” you said with a shudder. “Out of all the stupid traditions, that’s one I’ll never understand.”

“How do so many people have it on their bucket list?”

“Right? That, and the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Zero out of ten. It’s cold, there’s wind and again, there’s the question of bathrooms.”

Jimin laughed as he scrolled through the channels. “Alright, so no to the ball drop. Want to watch a movie?”

“Sure.”

“What movie?”

“Why’re you making me pick?” you whined, sinking deeper into his cushions. “That’s such a large amount of pressure.”

“Exactly, which is why I don’t want to do it.”

You laughed and after some back and forth, decided to watch About Time. This was a movie about obstacles and falling in love, which seemed more than fitting because of the new year. At first, you and Jimin were watching diligently but eventually, he asked a question and conversation slowly drifted from the movie.

At some point, Jimin lowered the volume to focus solely on you. You curled deeper into the couch beside him, your thighs somehow touching and shoulders inches apart. Jimin’s head leaned against the cushion and he continued to smile in a way which made your heart flip.

“Here’s a question,” you murmured, no longer pretending to watch the movie.

His eyes gleamed in the darkness. “What?”

“Why’d you tell Sabrina you only wanted to be friends?”

Briefly, his eyes widened. “How did… you know about that?”

“She told me.”

“Hm.” Jimin gave you a dubious look but moved past it. Sabrina had begun hanging out with your friends as of late. “But alright, I’ll answer. If I do though, you need to answer one of my questions. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“So, I was single when I came to Russet.” Jimin paused. “It was the first time in a long time, and I may have hooked up with a couple of people.”

“Hm,” you said tightly.

His eyes danced with amusement. “Jealous?”

“Answer the question.”

He laughed. “Anyways, I only hooked up with Sabrina the one time. Afterwards…” Jimin sighed. “I felt kind of weird about her asking me to switch partners. Then I overheard what she said about Ari at weigh-ins and just didn’t feel like anything more... Plus, there was the other reason.”

“And what was the other reason?”

“I was starting to like you,” he said, a bit softer. “The day you said you wanted to be friends was a giant weight from my chest. And the more relaxed you were around me, the more… I don’t know. The more I liked you, I guess. My mom has always called me her hopeless romantic,” Jimin said with a smile. “I don’t know about that, but I can be single-minded when I like someone. That was part of the reason I told Sabrina we shouldn’t hook up anymore.”

“Oh,” you whispered.

His smile turned lopsided. “Does that answer your question?”

“Yeah. I guess it does.”

“My turn, then.” Smile disappearing, his gaze darkened. “Why did you really call me that night at the club?”

“Oh. That. Well, I –”

“And don’t say it was because I had a car,” Jimin interrupted. “There were a lot of people you could’ve called to help. You didn’t, though. You called me. Why?”

You hesitated before you realized there was only one answer. “I wanted to see you,” you said honestly. “I was scared, I was alone and… you were the person I wanted to see.”

Jimin’s gaze had become nearly black, the air between you thick with something unsaid. You were suddenly conscious of all each part of your body pressed to his. When Jimin shifted on the couch, you moved somehow closer.

He hesitated, then glanced at your mouth. “I don’t…” Jimin licked his lips, sounding hoarse. “I don’t want to do anything you’re not ready for.”

“You won’t,” you told him.

Something uncertain passed over his face. “Maybe we should take things slow.”

“Or,” you said slowly. “I could tell you things I like about you, instead.”

“And what would be the point of that?”

Your gaze shifted to his. “You’ve told me a lot tonight about how much you like me,” you said softly. “About how long you’ve liked me. I think it’s time I returned the favor.”

Something in his gaze cracked and he nodded. The TV in the background was quiet, only the noise from the street and the whoosh of the heater breaking the silence.

“First,” you said, glancing down at his lap. “You have really nice hands.”

Jimin’s lips twitched. “My hands? I’ve always thought they were small.”

“Wrong. They’re the perfect size. Never have they dropped me.”

“Mm, that’s a good point.”

“And your smile,” you said.

“What about it?”

“I like your smile,” you told him. “It makes me smile.”

His eyes crinkled in demonstration. “Oh, yeah?”

“And your ears.”

Jimin laughed. “My ears?”

Reaching out, you delicately traced over an edge. “I’ve spent a long time looking at your profile, Park. I know what I’m talking about here.”

As your fingers moved lower, feather-light down his jaw, Jimin’s smile disappeared.

“I like your jaw, too,” you told him.

In the darkness, his gaze glinted, and you felt his jaw tense.

“And your lips,” you added, gaze lowering. “I like those a lot.”

“Y/N…” Jimin’s eyes fluttered shut.

“Yeah?”

He slowly exhaled. “I just don’t want you to regret this.”

“Jimin.”

He opened his eyes.

Your expression was serious. “I told you I wouldn’t jump into something before I was ready,” you said, lifting your other hand. “But I’m not in love with Finn anymore. It doesn’t hurt when I think about what happened last semester. I like you, Jimin. I want you. I don’t want to keep pushing you away. I get if you’re unsure about this, though. If you’re unsure about me.”

Jimin’s gaze roamed your face. “Unsure?”

“I know I hurt you before. I shouldn’t have kissed you and ran away. But I promise this isn’t like that. I’m not running away. I’m the furthest thing from running and I –”

Cutting you off, Jimin pressed his lips to yours.

You shuddered a little, leaning into his kiss before he pulled back. Jimin exhaled, barely a breath before he kissed you again.

Noses brushing, lips lingering, the kiss slowly deepened. Your hands curled into his hair, pulling him forward to bask in his warmth. It was dizzying, how different this felt than last time. Last time you’d been heartbroken, desperately yearning each time your lips had touched.

Now, Jimin felt like air, like sunshine as you drowned in his presence. Hand grasping your waist, Jimin moved you closer so your chest nestled to his. Lifting his fingers, his touch skimmed your jaw, your hairline before he circled the nape of your neck.

Drawing away, he bit down on your lip. With a low sort of moan, Jimin sought your lips again. When his mouth opened yours, his tongue swept forward and you nearly combusted.

This was only to tease, though. Only to taste before he pulled away, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. Thumb skimming your jawline, Jimin tilted your head back to brush a kiss to your throat. Moving higher, he worshiped a slow path up the column of your neck. At your ear, he nipped gently before he returned.

Now, his kisses began to deepen. Mouths opening, your tongues brushed only briefly before he chose to withdraw. You were glad you were kissing on the couch, because suddenly your own legs felt weak underneath you.

Hand re-gripping his waist, Jimin pulled you against him. Eager, your hands found his neck and the blanket dropped to the floor. It wasn’t enough, though – you needed more, wanted to feel him fully beneath you. Rising on your knees, you swung a leg over his lap and settled on top.

Jimin hissed, his head hitting the back of his couch. Your dress had ridden up in the process, exposing your thighs – his thumbs skimmed the surface before he looked up.

“Shit,” Jimin croaked.

Smiling, you bent to kiss him again. Jimin arched upwards, each part of your body electric where you touched. He shifted his hips, granting friction and heat which made you short-circuit. Pressing yourself closer, your thighs sild backwards until they nestled around his waist.

Jimin’s hand found your spine, pulling you closer as his hips pushed upwards. You groaned when you felt him shift underneath you. The kisses grew steadily hotter, this ache in your core increasing with every touch.

“Can I…” Pulling away, Jimin glanced lower. “Can I take off the sweatshirt?”

“Yeah,” you said, a bit dazed.

Jimin didn’t waste time, helping you pull this swiftly overhead. It was tossed on the ground and when your dress was revealed, he inhaled.

Slipping his hands up your bodice, Jimin met your gaze. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” he confessed, his voice hoarse.

“Do what?”

Your breath hitched when his hands skimmed your breasts, lingering in all your softest places.

“Touch you,” Jimin said. “It was torture to see you, to look at you and not be able to do this. Not how I wanted, anyways. I’d tell myself not to think about it, but…”

“Jimin.”

He paused and looked up. “Yes?”

“Touch me. Please.”

Without hesitation, Jimin slid his hands lower. Cupping your ass, he pulled you against him and allowed his other hand to drift up your spine. You shivered, closing your eyes as your head tilted back.

His hands slid up your front, over your breasts and under the straps of your dress. Jimin’s thumbs drifted lower, brushing your nipples through the fabric of your bodice. Opening your eyes, you looked down at him and saw his gaze darken.

Reaching higher, Jimin cupped the back of your neck and returned your lips to his.

He kissed you slowly, purposefully as you melted forward. Shifting against him, the kiss began to intensify. Mouths opening, your tongue swept forward in bold strokes against his. Suppressing a whimper, you ground your hips on his lap.

“Is,” you murmured, breaking free. “Is your bedroom unpacked?”

Jimin went still. “I – mostly, yeah.”

“Can I see it?”

“Fuck, yes,” he groaned, releasing your thighs as he stood from the couch.

You laughed, sliding down his front as your feet hit the ground. Tugging your dress down, you followed Jimin when he grabbed your hand. He pulled you down the hall, coming to a stop at the last room on the row. Pushing open the door, he flicked on the light and came to a stop.

Stepping forward, you glanced around Jimin’s room. You recognized some of the items from the two times you’d visited Jimin in the dorms. Photos of his family were carefully hung on the wall and he had the same pillows laid over his queen-sized bed.

Turning around, you took a step backwards and sat on his bed. “It’s nice,” you said, patting the comforter. “I like it here.”

Jimin watched you, his gaze half-lidded from the hall. “I like you here.”

Cheeks heating, you watched him enter and gently shut the door. Leaning back on your elbows, you arched a brow.

“Where’d we leave off?”

Jimin exhaled as he crossed the room. “I think you were on my lap,” he said hoarsely, kneeling beside you.

You nodded, moving to straddle him as he leaned to the wall. Catching your waist with both hands, Jimin pulled you against him, kissing you roughly even before you sat down. Suddenly ravenous, his hands slid to your ass as he rolled you against him. Inhaling sharply, you sucked his lower lip between teeth as he groaned.

Reaching up, Jimin tugged on your hair as you inhaled, throat exposed for him to kiss slowly down your front. When he returned to your lips, you ground your hips impatiently over the bulge in his pants.

Shifting his weight, Jimin’s spine hit the wall. He stared at you, slightly dazed with his kiss-reddened lips. Without looking away, Jimin lifted his fingers and began undoing his shirt. You stilled, watching each inch of skin be revealed. When he reached the last button, you gave in and helped push this aside. Smiling, Jimin sat up as his shirt fell to the floor.

You weren’t sure where to look first. Hands faltering, you slid them up his abs, over his shoulders and down his biceps. He was so perfect, it almost hurt to look at. Jimin’s breath quickened as you touched him and slowly, he lowered you down to the bed.

“Enough,” he said roughly, returning your lips to his.

As you kissed it turned lazy, nothing but grinding and touching. Jimin’s hair was messy beneath the pull of your fingers. He didn’t seem to mind, his own hands digging into the curve of your thigh. Playing with the hem of your dress, he deftly slid upwards.

“Jimin,” you said, breaking free. “Unzip me.”

His gaze darkened. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Jimin nodded, following suit when you sat up beside him. Turning around, you exposed your back and Jimin began to lower the zipper. He moved slowly, taking his time as his fingers brushed skin. Holding the dress up with your hands, you waited until it was fully unzipped before releasing it to the floor.

Turning around, you found Jimin’s jaw slack.

“You…” He roughly inhaled while he scanned your body. “Lace, Y/N? Really?”

“Do you like it?” you asked.

You may have gone overboard preparing for tonight. Although you hadn’t been sure what would happen, you also hadn’t wanted to be caught off your guard. Tonight, your constant need to plan had come in handy. Beneath your dress you’d worn a crimson lace bra and panties – a matching set which Jimin seemed to like, based on his expression.

“You’re going to kill me,” he muttered, lowering his lips to your neck.

Kissing slowly down your chest, he came to a stop where the two halves joined together. Skimming the length of your torso, his hands trembled a little when he brushed the lace.

Jimin looked up. “I’m sorry I keep touching you,” he murmured. “I just – you’re driving me crazy. You’ve been driving me crazy.”

“You said that before,” you whispered.

“I meant it.”

Kissing again up your body, he lingered in places your skin was exposed. Inhaling, your eyes fluttered shut as you grasped his shoulders.

Jimin’s hand slid between your thighs. “Part them,” he murmured, and you obeyed.

Heart racing, you opened your eyes and watched Jimin drag a finger slowly up the center of your panties. Even you could feel how damp the fabric was, how wet and ready you were for him.

Lifting his finger to his lips, Jimin sucked. “You’re soaking,” he breathed, sounding eager. “So good to me.”

Lowering his head, his tongue flicked your breast. Teasing the nipple through fabric, he urged and he sucked until it was fully erect. Moving onto the next one, Jimin grazed with his teeth until it pressed wantonly into the lace cup of your bra. Moaning his name, you arched against him.

Finding your wrists, Jimin pinned you backwards as he continued. Thighs caging your waist, he kept you hostage with his exquisite torture. The lace of your bra was now drenched, Jimin sucking debauchedly through fabric.

“Jimin,” you groaned, twisting on the sheets. “Please.”

His hips rolled lazily against your center. “Not yet,” he insisted before pulling back. “Not until you make a mess of my sheets. Want to ruin these panties.”

Sliding a hand between your thighs, he lightly circled your entrance. Feeling how wet you were, Jimin softly groaned. Sitting back on his heels, he finally relented and pulled your panties down. Tossing these to the floor, he returned to your thighs and spread your legs.

Lightly, Jimin dragged the pads of his thumbs up and down your panty line. “God, you’re so perfect,” he murmured. “Got my sheets fucking soaked.”

Separating two of his fingers, he slowly dragged his digits up and down your folds. You inhaled, feeling needy while you watched him touch you. Each brush of his fingers had you dripping – teasing over your entrance, he refused to give you exactly what you wanted. Feather-light, Jimin circled your swollen clit with his finger.

Hands gripping the sheets, you could only stare while Jimin brought you closer and closer to the edge. He was barely touching you, but it was the most turned on you’d ever been in your life. Jimin’s thumb swiped over your clit, rubbing you gently as you keened in frustration, arching against him.

He continued like this until you were gasping, begging for more and then – only then – did he slide a finger inside you. Legs trembling, you arched on his mattress and stared at him, glassy-eyed. When Jimin began to move in and out, you lost all control.

Lowering his head, he closed his lips over your clit.

“Oh my god,” you whimpered as you broke apart.

Barely did he suck before you were coming undone, pulsing around his fingers. Shuddering with pleasure, you collapsed on the bed as you rode out your high. Gently, Jimin pulled out his finger and returned to your lips.

Reaching behind you, he undid the clasp of your bra and tossed this on the floor. Once you were fully naked, he pulled you against him. You felt limp, thoroughly sated, but familiar excitement began to stir at his front pressed to yours. Tilting your head, he gently kissed you while your fingers wound in his hair.

Jimin moved slow, letting you take the lead. Your core continued to throb with oversensitivity, although this seemed to lessen the longer you kissed him. Before long, your nipples were hardening as you rubbed against him. Fingers digging into your thigh, Jimin pulled this over his hip to watch you lazily grind.

Realizing he still wore pants, you lowered a hand, determined to fix this. Jimin helped, dragging the zipper down to throw both these and his boxers down on the floor.

He bent to kiss you again, but you placed a hand on his chest. “Wait,” you murmured. “I want to see you.”

Jimin exhaled, leaning back so you could take in his body. If you’d thought his chest was unreal, it was nothing compared to his trim hips, sculpted thighs and cock nestled between.

“Oh,” you said, dragging a hand down his front.

Jimin shuddered a little. He was already hard, his cock thick and pretty with a reddened tip. It made your mouth water to look at, wanting to lick up the shaft. Reaching between you, you closed your fist around him and slowly jerked him off.

You watched in fascination as Jimin responded. His jaw tightened, abs tense while you teased over his frenulum. His cock responded instinctively, hardening further the longer you touched him.

After a few minutes of this, Jimin shook his head. “No more,” he said huskily, taking your hand in his. “I’ll come if you keep doing that.”

“Oh?” you murmured, gaze darting lower.

He chuckled, a rough sound in his throat. “I like watching you come,” Jimin confessed, his cock hard between you. “It turns me on. I’m… still trying to recover from your last orgasm.”

“Oh,” you said, in a completely different way.

Jimin exhaled, hair falling forward. “I hope that doesn’t weird you out.”

“Does it… weird me out that you like giving orgasms?”

“Well, when you put it like that.”

“How else would I put it?”

His grin became devious. “You could ask for another.”

Breathless, you nodded and Jimin’s gaze darkened.

He descended your body, not wasting any time as he positioned himself between your legs. Licking slow up your center, you gasped and instinctively drew your legs higher. Jimin didn’t bother easing you into it. No, now he ate you out like he wanted to.

Kissing your folds, he returned to your clit and sucked this into his mouth. Rolling the sensitive bud with his tongue, he teased and released before you knew what was happening. He continued to do this, spreading you underneath him and bringing you close to coming, only to pull back and leave you maddeningly empty.

Spreading your folds, he began licking sweetly over your clit. This was followed by loose, lazy sucking and more tender flicks. You stared dazedly at him between your legs, the sight more erotic than anything you could’ve imagined.

Grinding his cock into the sheets, Jimin thrust his hips while he pleasured you. You could tell he enjoyed this; each grunt from his lips was more affirmation. Moving lower, he circled your cunt with his tongue just to lap up your juices. You gasped at the sensation, having never felt it before. Flicking your clit with his thumb, Jimin fucked your cunt with his tongue before he slowly withdrew.

Spreading you wide, he returned to your clit and you clasped a hand over your lips before a moan could escape. Each curl of his tongue left you gasping, writhing beneath the pleasurable onslaught of his mouth. Pulling away, Jimin pressed a gentle kiss to your thigh before he rose up your body.

At your mouth, he kissed your fingers. “You don’t have to be quiet,” he told you. “I want to hear the noises you make, Y/N. It makes me feel good.”

Removing your hand, you slowly nodded.

Jimin just grinned, dropping between your legs to begin eating you out again. This time, you didn’t hold back. Jimin seemed to appreciate this as you slipped further from control. He was so good with his mouth, making you see stars as your legs started to shudder. When he slid his finger inside you and fingered you again, your hands fisted in the sheets.

“Ji-jimin,” you gasped, writhing beneath him. “Jimin, I – oh.”

He began to move faster, adding a second finger as your insides clenched around him. Everything tightened, hovering at a breaking point while Jimin continued, relentless. His mouth on your clit, his fingers inside you – everything broke apart when you came, gasping his name.

Jimin didn’t move, kissing your sex as you slowly came down. He lapped at your sex, licking up your arousal before withdrawing his fingers. Once your breathing had steadied, Jimin returned to the sheets beside you.

“Good?” he breathed, draping an arm over your waist.

“Oh my god, yes,” you exhaled, burying your face in his chest.

He laughed, pulling you closer. Jimin started to pull away, which made you look up and frown.

“What are you doing?” you said.

He paused. “I’m looking for a tissue.”

“Why?”

“I… I’m kind of at a loss here.”

“No, I mean why now,” you said, baffled. “I can come again, Jimin. I want to come with you inside me.”

Jimin stared at you a moment.

“Unless…” Uncertain, you hesitated. “You don’t want to…?”

“Fuck,” Jimin muttered, sounding hoarse. “No – I want to. I really want to. Are you sure, though?” he said, reaching to open the side drawer of his bed.

You grinned when he pulled out a condom, ripping this open.

“I’m sure,” you murmured, moving closer.

Jimin rolled the condom onto himself, pausing before he went any further. Shifting his weight so he hovered over you, Jimin searched your gaze. Reaching lower, you casually stroked his cock and guided him to your center.

He didn’t enter yet, content to take his time. Instead, Jimin bent and kissed you, dragging a hand down your side. His fingers paused at your breast, tweaking your nipple until it stood fully erect. Moving to your waist, he curved under your ass and lifted your hips to his.

Arching upwards, you felt his cock brush your center. The touch made you pant, wanting him inside you and wanting it now. Rolling over his length, you marveled at the feel of him between your legs. Having him so close and not having him inside you was maddening.

“Jimin,” you whimpered.

“Yeah?” he murmured, continuing to thrust between your thighs.

“Please,” you begged him.

“Alright, baby,” he said and rolled you onto your back.

It was the first time he’d used the endearment, sending a wave of warmth through you as your legs parted. Reaching lower, Jimin positioned himself at your entrance. It took him a moment to work his way in; you were so wet, he needed a second try. With only his tip inside, you immediately clenched and buried your head in his shoulder.

Lightly, Jimin brushed a kiss to your hair. “Relax, baby,” he murmured, making you glance up. “I’ll make you feel good. I promise.”

Slowly, you nodded. “Okay.”

Laying slowly back down, you tried to relax while he worked his way deeper. With slow, shallow thrusts, Jimin finally bottomed out and you stared at him in amazement. His cock was thicker than you were used to and stuffed to the brim like this, you felt so full. Glancing down, you saw his hips nestled snugly to yours.

When you looked up, Jimin met your gaze. “I’m sorry,” he exhaled, hanging his head. “I just – I need a minute.”

“What’s wrong?” you blurted, immediately worried.

A smile passed over his lips. “Nothing’s wrong.” He looked up. “You’re just… fuck. I feel like a damn virgin. You’re so tight and wet, I’m losing my mind.”

Hearing him say this sent a shiver through you. Shifting your hips, you reveled in the sensation of him moving inside you.

Jimin groaned. “No,” he protested. “You can’t do that right now.”

“Do what?”

“Try and make me move,” he murmured. “I know you can’t see yourself, so you can’t see how hot you look. Tits out, pussy spread and dripping all over my cock.”

“Oh,” you breathed.

“Sounding like that.”

“Jimin. If you don’t –”

He suddenly thrust deeper, grinding his pelvis against your core and making you groan. Speechless, you stared as he slowly pulled out. Jimin teased you with his tip, moving a few inches back in before he thrust again.

“Oh,” you groaned, jolted upwards on the bed.

His gaze dropped to your chest. “Fuck,” Jimin said quietly, dropping down to an elbow.

He moved again in earnest, thrusting slowly in and pulling back out. It made your breath catch, needing more but loving the torture. It was torture to feel every inch of him and have Jimin continue to hold back. You knew he could go faster, deeper, but wanted to stay in control.

Dropping his head, Jimin slowly kissed your neck. His cock continued to move, fucking you slowly as your legs opened wider.

“Jimin,” you whimpered.

Your hips chased after his, hoping to coerce him deeper.

He smirked. “Yes, baby?”

“Please,” you said, arching against him. “I want more.”

“You want it harder?”

As he said this, Jimin increased his strength. Keeping the tempo the same, each thrust of his cock had your lips parting with pleasure.

“Yes,” you whimpered, barely hanging on.

“And faster? You want that, too?”

You nodded, slack-jawed as Jimin sped up the pace. His cock began to pound into you, hand fisting in sheets as he gave it to you hard. Arching underneath him, your hands dragged down his back as Jimin fully let go. With each thrust of his hips, his pelvis brushed your clit and yet, it still wasn’t enough.

“More?” he teased, continuing to fuck you.

“More,” you whimpered, sliding your hands up your breasts. Tweaking the nipples, you watched his gaze harden. “I want more, Jimin.”

He immediately moved, as though he’d been waiting for this. Grasping your ankles in one hand, he lifted them high overhead and pulled his cock out. You gasped when he did so, your hands falling to the side while you were put on display. The position pushed your pussy lips together, giving an incredible view of your dripping cunt.

Jimin plunged his cock back inside, nearly making you scream. It felt so deep this way – so deep and hard and deliciously wanton. Jimin fucked you from above, hips slamming into you and making your breasts bounce.

Jimin groaned, his hips never faltering. “Touch them,” he said, lowering your ankles to one shoulder. “Touch your tits for me, baby.”

You obeyed, hands sliding over your breasts to tease your nipples. This sent a shock of pleasure straight to your core and Jimin hammered your g-spot, making you see stars. Jaw slack, you could only lie there and take it while he made you come.

It was too much, the wave of pleasure threatening to overwhelm, but then Jimin leaned forward and you finally snapped. You felt him release into the condom as you fell apart, rope after rope of hot cum inside you.

Eventually, Jimin softened and fell onto his elbow. As he opened his eyes, he sought your gaze and you smiled. His cheeks were flushed, his hair dark and sweaty and you couldn’t help the deep surge of affection within you.

“I don’t know about you,” he murmured. “But that was pretty fucking incredible.”

“Same here,” you whispered. “I’d like to do it again sometime.”

“Three orgasms weren’t enough?”

“Were they enough for you?”

“No.” Jimin laughed. “I could watch you come all night. But we should probably get you cleaned up and all that.”

“Probably,” you agreed, although you made no effort to move.

Eventually Jimin sighed and gently pulled out. Tossing his condom in the trash, he showed you to the bathroom and let you do what you needed to do. When you returned, Jimin was on top of his bed. He’d put back on his boxers and held out his sweatshirt.

“I thought you might want this,” he said, uncertain.

Smiling, you took it and lowered it over your head. Climbing beside him on the bed, you rested your head on his shoulder and cuddled beside him. Listening to his breathing, you concentrated until yours started to match.

Outside, cheers erupted from the street. Scrambling upwards, you fought to look out Jimin’s side window. As you hurried to see what the commotion was about, Jimin groaned when you flashed him your bare ass, but followed suit.

Glancing outside, you realized it must have turned midnight. Fireworks went off over the skyline, people cheered below, and someone had lit a sparkler on the street. Voices drifted higher, wishing each other a happy new year as slowly, you turned around to face Jimin.

He smiled at you, his happiness clear when he pulled you to him. A dizzying rush of what-if’s and excitement went through you and somehow, you knew this would be only the beginning.

“Happy new year,” he murmured.

“Happy new year,” you whispered, tilting your face up to his.

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading this series 😊 It’s been a whirlwind, so thank you for sticking with our main characters throughout the journey! I hope you enjoyed and are having a wonderful holiday season :) happy (almost) new year!

RAISE THE BARRE MASTERLIST 

© kpopfanfictrash, 2020. Do not copy or repost without permission.

[libraryofloveletters]

also. 15+16 with eddie fluff/comfort including chris because he’s adorable

You Feel Like Home

Eddie Diaz x Reader

Warnings: fem!reader, mentions of alcohol

Prompts: #15: “Did you let yourself in?” // #16: “How did you get in my house?”

Category: fluff

Word Count: 2.1k

Author’s Note: here’s a lil something because I haven’t posted a x reader in so long. Also I didn’t check for errors cause I'm lazy so ignore any mistakes :) 

----

It’s raining, the streets were drenching with water and muck which you found yourself staring at as you sat in your car at the intersection.

You had left your job, more like you were fired for something you didn’t do but you hated your job, 100 and 10% despited it and everyone there- needless to say, you didn’t mind not being there anymore.

The shitty weather on top of the idea of having to find a new job was putting more than damper on your day. So here you were in the middle of the day driving to your best friend’s house. He doesn't like to admit that he’s your best friend but he is and you both knew that.

The driveway was empty and the house was dark, at least from what you could see. Hopping out of the car, you make your way to the front door, the rain drenching your clothing. The key to his house hanging from the bunch you held in your hand, you let yourself in.

“Anyone home?” shouting into the dark house, slipping off your shoes.

There was no answer, you assumed Eddie was at work and Chris was still at school which made sense considering it was 2:30 on a Friday afternoon.

A puddle of water trialed behind you on your way to the bathroom, stopping to get a towel from the cupboard. The wet clothes get stripped off and tossed into the tub, making a mental note to come back and put them in the dryer after you get something to wear.

The towel now wrapped around you, you find your way down the hallway and into Eddie’s bedroom. There was a basket of folded laundry on the bed, deciding that it’s probably better to get something from the basket than to tumble through his drawers.

Just as you go to drop the towel, you hear the front door open and then a woman’s voice.

“Shit shit shit” you mumble to yourself and look around the room frantically- there’s no way you could get dressed before the person gets to the room, you have no choice but you stay the way you are.

The footsteps approaching the room, a knock on the door before it opens, Carla sticks her head in the room and you let out a breath of relief.

“Jesus, it’s just you” sitting on the bed, you smile at her and she laughs softly.

“Who’d you think it was hun?”

“I thought Eddie had come home, with a woman. That would have been hard to explain- ya know, a woman in a towel in his bedroom while he’s not home.”

“Mhm hm,” Carla has one of her famous mischievous looks on her face. “Sure, because it’s normal for you to be half naked in his bedroom when he isn't home.” She laughs.

“Were you waiting for him?” she teased, your face twists and you groan.

“Carla! No, god. I had a shitty day and I wanted to hang out. It was raining cats and dogs when I got here and my clothes got wet.” you explain what happened and she gives you a hum, stepping back out and leaving you to change.

You can hear laughter coming from the bedroom down the hall, you make your way there. Chris sat on his bed, looking out his window while he was on the phone.

“Love you too dad, bye” the phone is set beside him on the bed, you knock on the door and Chris looks back, his face lighting up when he sees you.

“Hey kiddo” smiling at the boy who’s now making his way over to you, you step into the room and meet him halfway.

“Hi! What are you doing here?” he asks you, hugging you.

“Came by to see your dad but he wasn’t home. I’m better now because you’re free” looking down at him, Christopher laughs and holds your hand as the two of you walk down the hallway to the living room. Carla brings him a snack and joins the two of you in the living room, Christopher telling you both about his day at school.

----

Eddie runs to the front door from his truck, the rain had been pouring all day.

“I’m home!” he shouts, as he steps in only for Carla to shush him from the kitchen.

His face screws and he makes his way down the hallway to Christopher’s room but he wasn't in there. Carla sat in the kitchen reading her book, she smiles when he steps in the kitchen.

“Hey, where’s Chris ?” he asks, washing his hands and pulling a pot out of the cupboard.

“Shower,” shutting the book, she slips it into her bag. “You’re going ?” Eddie glances over his shoulder, pouting slightly. Carla always helps him with dinner and truthfully, she’s the better cook out of the two.

“I’ve got myself a hot date tonight” She tells him, giving him a smile before making her way to the front door.

Eddie follows her, “what? really? But who’s going to keep me company while Chris does his homework ?” his hand coming up to his chest as he sighs dramatically.

Carla’s hand meets his, patting his chest. “Chris is done with his work, he had help” nodding towards the couch, Eddie follows her gesture to see you sleep on the couch.

“When did- are those my clothes ?” his mouth hung in disbelief.

Why were you asleep on his couch in his clothes ? He wasn't even home, how the hell did you get in ?

“Mhm hm” Carla hums, a soft laugh slipping past her lips. “Have fun sugar, I'll be back in the morning. Tell lil man I said bye” She steps out, pulling the door shut behind her.

The pattering of feet pulled Eddie’s attention away from a sleeping you on the couch.

“Dad!” Chris’s smile lit up the room, Eddie found himself smiling at his son.

“Hey buddy” he kneeled to hug him, holding him close after a long day at work.

“How was work ?” Christopher asks his father as the two make their way to the kitchen.  

“It was a fine, normal day of us saving the city” Eddie chuckled, smiling at his son who was sitting at the table now. “Hey bud?”

“Mhm hm ?”

“When did y/n get here?”

“I don’t know, she was here when me and Carla got home” he shrugs, turning his attention back to something Eddie had left out on the table.

Eddie is half way into the fridge and it was down to its bare bones. A carton of milk, two eggs left in a tray and a half used stick of butter - guess he had forgotten to go grocery shopping yesterday.

“How does pizza for dinner sound?” Eddie turns to Chris who’s nodding eagerly. Pizza was the way to that kid’s heart.

---

dinner was short, the boys talked about their day. Chris told his father all about his day at school and how they learned about the atmosphere and space in science class and Eddie told him about a resume they had today - the safe for work details of course, he always left out the gruesome parts.

“So Carla told me y/n helped with your homework ?”

“Yeah, I only had math work to do. It was easy”

Eddie hums, it was still relatively early and a Friday afternoon, he thought why not have a movie night.

“Here’s the plan for tonight, you tidy up your room real quick and then we can build a fort and have movie night. How does that sound ?”

“Like a plan!” he smiles at Eddie before getting up. Eddie sits at the table watching Chris make his way into the hallway and towards the bathroom.

The sound of a snore brought him back to reality, he remembered you were still on the couch asleep. He quietly got up and made his way over, crouching in front of the couch.

You looked at peace, which was strange to him because the two of you are always bickering or poking each other about something. The only times he had seen you smile was if someone made fun of him or if you were with Chris - he had never actually seen you relaxed.

“Take a picture and leave or I'm filing a restraining order” you mumble sleepily. Eddie laughed, you were always teasing him about his stare.

Eddie stands, lifting your legs and sitting before dropping them down onto his lap. “How did you get in my house? Did you let yourself in?”

“I used the key” rolling onto your jacket, you shift upwards slightly. The disapproval on Eddie’s face was very much visible.

“I gave you that key for emergencies!”

“It was an emergency!”

Eddie sighs, his hand rubbing the piece of bare skin showing from the rolled up pants. The room is quick, the sound of the rain pouring echoed through the house.

“What’s on your mind ? I can practically see the wrinkles forming on your face”

“Hey!” you nudged him with your foot while he laughed. “Nothing,” sitting up to face him properly. “I just had a shitty day and wanted to see my bes- my friend.”

A small smile appeared on his face. “Your what ?” “Shut up Eddie”

“No no, say it” he grabs your foot, his fingers reaching to the sole of your foot. Your eyes widen, shaking your head. “Don’t you dare.”

“Oh but I do” he smirks before tickling the bottom of your foot. You try to pull your foot away but you’re laughing and wiggling around on the couch so much that you end up rolling off but your foot is still on Eddie’s lap.

There you were lying diagonally off the couch with your feet on his lap. He shifts to the floor, now sitting beside you. The two of you have your backs up against the couch.

“Seriously, talk to me. What’s up ?”

“Just wanted some company. Work was shitty and I- I don’t know. I didn’t know where to go. There’s nothing waiting for me at my place, the weather’s kinda depressing so I didn’t want to go drinking because it would just make me sad” you chuckle, turning your head to face him.

“I got in the car and just drove and I ended up here. This is home, you know? ” you admit. Humming, he smiles.

“I’m glad you felt like you could come here.”

“Well I know you couldn’t kick me out. You love me and my puppy face too much” you pout playfully making his laugh before nudging you with his shoulder.

Eddie’s arm is now over your shoulder, pulling you into his side. “You’re welcomed here anytime.” he presses a kiss to the top of your head.

Tilting your head from his shoulder, you're now face to face with him. There had always been unspoken feelings between the two of you, everyone could see that - even the two of you.

He leans in, a hand cupping your cheek like it was chiseled to fit the curve of your structure perfectly.

The palm of your hand wraps around his wrist, leaning closer to him.

This was the moment you were waiting for.

“DAD!” Chris shouts, causing Eddie to pull away. Not that either of you minded but there does that moment.

“Yeah ?” His hand was still cupping your cheek. “Can we watch a movie now?”

“Of course, pick one out.” He moves his hand to give the remote to Chris, you cheek cold from the loss of touch.

The 3 of you settle into the couch, Christopher between the two of you. The boy settled on Space Jam though he had seen it a million times.

Eddie’s arm is stretched over the back of the couch. It was bent at an awkward position, his fingers barely grazing your cheek, letting you know that he’s right there.

The two of you shared stolen glances all night, watching each other more than the movie. Eventually Chris fell asleep between the two of you.

You felt safe, peaceful, home.

This felt like home.

----- 

taglist: @hailsstormthings @averyhotchner @captainxholmes @advicefromnixxxx @keenmarvellover @beth-winchester21 @fernandaweasley2 @yikesyikesyikes95 @hotchsdarling @duhbar1975 @dralexreid

[kittydemon9000]

The Beginning of Heatstroke, aka Red's Villain Origin

* crashes down from the ceiling * I HAVE FINALLY FINISHED ONE OF MY 5+ CURRENT WRITING PROJECTS! BEHOLD, A WRITTEN VERSION OF THE 'Red's Villain Origin AU', also known as RVO / Heatstroke AU

To summarize the AU for SPBNR for those that don't now it: 

“Who'd be the biggest conspiracy theorist out of the M!Ninja? The one who drinks 5 hour energy at 3am and spits off the craziest theories and then actually gets it right but nobody gives the theory any merit because the rest of the theories are too crazy?”

The answer: Red / M!Kai

Red: Okay hear me out: Smith is actually an alternative version of one of us sent here from another dimension.

The other M!Ninja: You’re just saying that because Smith’s cool and you want him to be your counterpart

Based on the M!ninja making red cork boards trying to figure out ‘What Is Up With Smith’: Red gets increasingly accurate and nobody will believe him (all pre shogun reveal) and he eventually snaps and takes up a secret villain persona to fight Shogun like 'if they won't believe me I'll do it myself' and it gets awkward when he accidentally does too much damage and catches not only Shogun's attention like planned, but also the rest of the Ninjaforce, and now he has to keep his own identity a secret

So, without further ado, I present... Heatstroke

------------

Red blamed the 5-hour energy coffee blend at 3:00am for this.

It was no surprise that between ‘Operation: What’s Going on with Smith’ & the sudden appearance of Shogun that the resident Bounty red-stringed ‘joke’ cork-board doubled in size and seriousness. It also was no surprise that Red had a corner all to himself and that his theories were… in the words of the others, ‘wildly inaccurate and implausible’.

But this time, he was sure he’d gotten it right.

Smith is Shogun sent here from another continent/planet/dimension with the goal of protecting Ninjago City.

The latest string of laughs and scoffs at his theory was the last straw. He’d show them. He’d prove it!

Which was why he was currently standing on the roof of a noodle house, awkwardly adjusting the spare motorcycle helmet he’d ‘borrowed’ from Nya and painted black and orangey-yellow (red had seemed too obvious). He’d exchanged his Ninjaforce outfit for a soot-burned cross between a bomber jacket and a leather jacket. Down his back jutted a row of flames like the spines of a monster, courtesy of one of Nya & Jay’s unfinished inventions Red had modified- surely nothing bad would come of that!

For tonight, the Red Ninja was off-duty. For tonight, it was Heatstroke’s turn.

He fiddled with one of the weapons he’d ‘lent out’ from Master Wu. It resembled a small arm canon, like a smaller version of the Ultimate Weapon. The plaque under its post had read ‘Elemental Focuser’, which, in cryptic Wu speak, probably translated to ‘you can use an elemental power like something out of Avatar: The Last Airbender’. So far he’d only figured out how to activate a focused jet of fire. Well, at least it was on brand. He hoped it would help him catch Shogun’s attention so he could unmask him.

He’d tried confronting Smith at school, of course. But there were only so many ways of saying ‘are you the new vigilante helping the ninjas’, and Smith has a genuine talent for dancing around the topic. Red could confront him with the name Shogun to get a proper reaction, but that would mean explaining how he knew the name and outing himself as the Red Ninja.

So fake villainy really was the only way.

His plan was to use the Elemental Focuser to cause some minor petty damage, just enough to attract the new vigilante. Perhaps set a trash can on fire, block an alleyway with rocks (if he figured out how to change the setting from fire to earth), small things that could easily be repaired.

Of course, plans were never actually stuck to. One way or another, something was always improvised.

Red’s improvisation just happened to involve him accidentally setting the entire alleyway on fire.

He’d only been aiming for one dumpster, honest! And maybe he’d spotted a couple fliers for a SoG meeting on the ground and happened to burn those too. And a newspaper article blaming Lloyd for the recent Garmadon attack, again. And an article about those ‘Damn Ninja Menaces’ by a S. Sonah Sameson. And-

Okay, so maybe Red had aimed the fire at a few small targets. But just a few! And with good reason and good care, but…

Well, fire liked to burn. Give it enough kindle and it’ll continue to grow, stretching like reaching branches towards each other to join in a massive bonfire. 

So now the entire alleyway was on fire, and Red was panicking. 

He’d luckily chosen an abandoned part of town near the beaches where Shogun sightings seemed most frequent, but with the stupid Elemental Focuser not switching from fire mode to water mode or ice mode or something that didn’t have the potential to burn Ninjago City to the ground, Red had no way of stopping the flames.

And more flames meant more destruction which meant a bigger audience.

Which was why his previously muted comm suddenly flared to life, the only warning Red had before Nya’s water strider mech slid around the corner.

Red scrambled onto a roof as the mech drove past, spraying water at the bonfire to dose it. His sigh of relief was just as quickly dosed as Lloyd’s voice came over the comms; “Status, Grey?”

“Flames are out,” Nya replied. “Pursing the joker that set it ablaze.”

Uh oh. Red took off across the roof, leaping from building to building. Tiles creaked, pebbled and dust scattering underfoot. The sounds of the mech’s engine roaring behind him echoed through alleyways below to create the illusion the mech was everywhere at once. 

As the chase grew on, more mechs started to join in. Red ducked into a narrow avenue to avoid Zane’s tank, then under a cafe overhang to throw off Jay and Lloyd. His heart hammered in his chest and he groaned, filling the inside of the motorcycle helmet with steam. Saying this was going ‘bad’ would be the understatement of the century. 

What had he been thinking? Oh wait: he hadn’t. Seriously? ‘Oh I’ll just pretend to be a villain real quick, that should get Shogun’s attention and not the attention of literally my entire team of fellow ninjas!’ Stupid, impulsive, this was why everyone was always calling the red ninja the ‘hothead’ when he really tried not to be- Lloyd’s voice over the comms snapped him from his thoughts. “I can’t catch them! It’s like they know our every move!”

Red winced as he climbed up a banister and leapt from balcony to balcony. Sorry, Lloyd. 

He didn’t miss how the others asked Nya where Red was. And how she made up excuses the others bought so easily- granted, he’d told those excuses to his sister before setting his plan into motion, but still, ouch. They acted like he was simply being at best too busy and at worst lazy and selfish.

He just wanted them to know the truth! Why couldn’t they at least try to believe him when-

Of course, that was when Shogun dropped out of the sky and tackled him.

Red shouted with surprise as he tumbled down from the second floor, slamming into a few softer bags of garbage to break his fall before rolling and slamming into the unforgiving concrete. A crack formed in his vision as the visor of his motorbike helmet smacked into the concrete ground. One of the fire jets on his back sputtered and sparked, sending a thin wisp of smoke into the air.

Shogun pinned his wrists to the ground and growled. “Who are you?”

Red tried to break free, agony turning his muscles and bones to fire with the movement after his fall, but the vigilante was too strong. Damn, how often did this guy train?

“Who am I?” Red said, a nervous tinge to his voice. He quickly smoothed it over with faked confidence. “Who are you? Who are all of us, really?”

Shogun narrowed his eyes behind his hood. “Did Garmadon send you? Or someone else?”

Red sputtered. Really, the nerve! Garmadon? The thought turned his insides to disgusting mud. “Nobody sent me!”

“Then why are you here?” Shogun spat.

“Why am I here?” Why was he here again? Oh right, the bright idea on how to reveal that Shogun was Smith. “It’s, uh… a valid reason! That I don’t have to tell you!” He tried for a villainous laugh. Stay in character, don’t blow your cover, you got this!

Shogun was unimpressed. “Nearly burning down my home was a valid reason?”

“Well, I wasn’t trying to set everything on- wait, WHAT?” Uh oh. “You LIVE here?”

Now it was Shogun’s turn to look uncomfortable, though the expression was quickly wiped from his face. “Nothing wrong with this district.” 

Red nodded. “‘Course not. Uh, sorry about that… wasn’t my intention, I swear.”

Shoot, he could hear Jay’s jet getting closer. He had to get out of here, but Shogun, annoyingly, didn’t seem to be in the mood to simply let him go. “Then what is your intention?”

“Well, for starters, it’s getting out of here. This really isn’t going to plan and I’d rather just be home right now, or even inventing a time machine like in that book ‘Hands of Time’ to slap my past self in the face for even thinking about this stupid idea in the first place-“

Jay wasn’t the only one that could ramble under pressure, it seemed.

Shogun leaned closer. “What idea?”

Red shrugged as best he could with how he was pinned to the ground. “Well, for starters, I just wanted to prove to my friends that you’re Smith, and things just kinda escalated from-”

The words were out of his mouth before he realized what he said. 

Shogun lurched back, letting go of him. His eyes betrayed a kaleidoscope of emotions; surprise, worry, suspicious, hurt, fear, realization. 

“…Kai?”

Well, f!ck.

“I-“

Red was about to badly attempt to bullsh!t his way out of his identity reveal before it suddenly dawned on him that Shogun had not denied his theory. 

Which meant Shogun was Smith.

And it also meant Smith instantly recognized him as Kai, which, considering his disguise, was aptly concerning. Sure, he was the first one in his group of friends people would think to do something this extreme but give him some credit! Zane was a regular detective, he’d do the same if it meant answers! Or, well, at least something similar. And Nya could be an adrenaline seeker. And Lloyd- well, maybe not Lloyd. Or Jay, either. Cole had his head just enough on his shoulders that he probably wouldn’t do this either.

But come on, instantly guessing it?

Well, at least Smith/Shogun didn’t know Kai was the Red Ninja. That would be a catastrophe.

Right. Back to the current catastrophe at hand.

Shogun- Smith- still had a look as if he’d been slapped, and Red hated it. He hadn’t meant to hurt his friend. Shogun… Shogun hadn’t wanted them to find out his identity. And then Red had gone and done it, just to prove that he could be the smart one, or a leader, or the protector so they didn’t get hurt, or literally anything but just the ‘hotheaded one’. 

…And he’d done it in the most hotheaded, impulsive way possible.

He really was an idiot.

The cracked helmet hid the look on his face, a twisted mess of distraught and shame. But it didn’t help hide how he took stumbled to his feet and away from Smith, nervous that any second he’d spill another mistake and mess up again, like how he always freaking messed up on everything. Don’t pick this fight, interject there instead, no, not there, idiot, there, FMS why are you so useless-

Focus, focus.

Lloyd’s voice, sharp in the intercom and full of static from his tumble, snapped him from his thoughts. “Anyone got eyes on the arsonist?”

Red caught Smith’s eye as he raised his hand to his own communicator. He was so screwed, so busted, so doomed… Smith would report it, and the others would know, and they’d think he was just messing around in an alleyway with some stolen devices and weapons out of curiosity or rage, - and-

“None yet, still looking.”

…What?

Smith stared at him, gaze searching. He looked shaken, more so than Red- who’d just taken a fall from a second story, mind you, it was a miracle he wasn’t more injured than a couple small scrapes and some future bruises-, yet everything from the set of his jaw to the softening of his furrowed brows suggested a change in emotions. Well, not quite change; more like repress and replace.

“You wanted to prove yourself, didn’t you.”

Red flushed, hand instinctually clamping into a tight fist at his side. The still-working fire jets on his back ignited without him pressing any buttons; faulty activation from the fall or something. 

Palms up and hands raised, Smith silently asked to defuse the situation. “Didn’t mean it as an insult. This wasn’t about venting some anger, was it.”

Red’s lack of response only confirmed it. Smith continued. “I won’t say anything about this if you don’t tell anyone my identity. Deal? I know finding it out was important to you, but-“

“Deal,” Red interrupted. Guilt ate away at his core, like a wave of water dousing a candle. “Smith, I-“ He swallowed hard and stared at the alley floor. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… to…”

Smith’s hand was suddenly on his shoulder and he flinched before relaxing as Smith didn’t move further, nor did the grip tighten. “I’m a little hurt, you’re right. But I’m not mad. And I won’t tell the others, so you can relax. But you better get out of here and get yourself an alibi. We can talk at school or something.”

Wow, he was handling this rather calmly. Red was struck by the sudden memory of- what did Jay call the word? Right. Compartmentalizing. That… wasn’t healthy. But at the roar of Lloyd’s mech somewhere nearby, he didn’t comment further. Instead, he shot Smith a grateful nod and ran down the alley, sticking to the shadows and blind spots of the flying mechs and the tight alleyways where the land mechs couldn’t reach him. 

When he got home, miraculously without further incident (though Shogun leading the others on a wild goose chase over the comms certainly helped there), he ditched the outfit in a bag hidden beneath a loose floorboard in the shed. He’d return the weapon to Master Wu’s ship later, and… well, hope Nya never searched for the missing supplies. There wasn’t a way of fixing it without involving her or Jay, and neither was an option.

Heatstroke was back off duty, and so was the Red Ninja.

For now, he could just be Kai Smith. And there wasn’t any issue with that.

…

Right?

—————

yooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

THIS IS AMAZING REHJJGFHDESFXJVZ

and ah yes, good ol trauma and compartmentalizing, we love to see it