#i am a menace to society and I use my chaos for good (I use my chaos to write cheesy fluff one shots send tweet)

[radioisntdead]

I need to see it immediately.

Where is Susan, our grandmother, and we are her grandson/granddaughter

Give this woman love!!! 💗💗

What sweet nonsense is where the reader spends time with his grandmother

Good evening my dear! I am SO GLAD Y'ALL WANT SUSAN CONTENT LIKE I DO, I ADORE Susan, I think this counts as a drabble? Anyways I added a sprinkle of angst, definitely differs from my Susan & child/nibling reader headcanons but we're not gonna talk about that, anyways I hope you enjoy!

Grandma Susan

Warnings!

Cannibalism, and Susan

Down in Cannibal town lived a pair of a cranky old lady and her grandchild,

Her old lady babysitting may or may not have been picked up off the streets grandchild,

You see your grandmama Susan was a MENACE TO SOCIETY, to be fair she earned it, she went through life in the 1800's but that's not an excuse for her smacking people she didn't like with her cane, or cursing them out,

the majority of the cannibal town residents were excused, as they were a tight knit community and Susan was, somehow, respected

only a few unlucky cannibalistic souls were smacked harshly with the cane.

You were dubbed the Susan handler at some point by Rosie so whenever Susan was Susan-ing you were called to calm down your dearest grandmama, it did come with the risk of getting gently smacked with the cane but you didn't particularly mind it, the most you said to do was calm her down and offer to get her some tea and pray that she would quit cursing at random overlords and the princess of hell.

But caring for your elderly grandmama wasn't all chaos and fearing for her life, you did have bonding moments, such as now, your grandmother much like many old people liked knitting, mainly because she could stab someone with the needles if needed, you on the other hand preferred crochet. [Spreading my crochet propaganda]

It was days like this you adored, acidic rain pouring outside, the radio playing some type of classical music, you sat cozily in the couch listening to your meemaw Susan ramble on about kids these days and how back in her day they were more respectful or whatever, or maybe drop lore about how she was involved in supporting woman's rights movements from the shadows, maybe how when she was alive she did this or that while she knitted a throw pillow,

You'd get her nagging at you about how you should hurry up and get hitched, although she didn't approve of anyone for her dear grandchild, secretly afraid of the day you would finally grow up and move away from her, leaving her alone, sure she had the cannibals but they weren't her beloved grandchild,

She'd never tell you that though, but you knew, after all you were closest to her, and frankly you weren't planning on leaving her anytime soon, even if you did you wouldn't go far.

Or the days where you'd cook together bonding over her teaching you how to make cannibal meat loaf, or you grilling a sinner thigh during the summertime outside, with Susan under an umbrella going on about something.

Specifically winter holidays of gifting your Nana Susan something you made like a blanket or something you saved up for like a parasol,

She'd make a comment about it but would use it all the time, after all actions speak louder the words,

She'd give you something expensive that you mentioned in passing about liking, waving off your excitement by saying she got it last minute like it hadn't been hidden in her woredrob for the past two months.

Birthdays with her were bittersweet, they were a sign that you had survived another year in this hell, that you both were growing older and older, how long it had it been since you were alive? You'd bake her favorite cake, pick up pinkie fingers, and get her something nice,

She'd order a cake for you, cursing at the poor employee to make it perfect for her grandchild, she'd buy you a set of pearls or some type of jewelry.

You'd sit down Infront of her rocking chair and place a brush in her hands asking her to brush your hair, no matter the length {unless your bald then I guess she's brushing your scalp? With a soft brush}

You curled into her arms, it was after the extermination, Many Cannibals were lost, friends you had known for ages gone just like that, she couldn't say anything, no snappy comment, no words of comfort, she could only watch as you sobbed into her, the only thing she could do was pat your back until you were smoothed to sleep.

You woke up the next day with warm soup on the stove and a blanket on you with Susan snoozing away on her old wooden rocking chair.

Actions speak far louder then words.

Your grandmother was cranky, grumpy, had zero fear towards death, she cursed like a sailor and she had a soft spot for you,

And you wouldn't have it any other way.

SUSAN SUPREMACY, also I switched around calling her Nana and Meemaw Susan because she wouldn't have just the classic grandma Susan,

Anyways I got one more Susan request and part two of Eldritch horror reader coming up so tune on in for that! Have a wonderful evening everyone!

[txttletale]

What are your thoughts (lorewise) on Warhammer fantasy so far and what's your favorite faction

i love skaven. ive been a skaven fan for like 20000 years ever since i briefly played actual tabletop. they're just funny little guys :)

when warhammer is good it's because it's embracing its original 80s gonzo spirit of 'just throw any old pop cultuire shit in there and figure it out later' -- i love how the skaven are, like, cartoon mad scientists with nuclear power and genetic engineering and also stupid rats who love scheming and betrayal anbd they waltz around with giant fucking flesh monsters and gatling guns and Combat Hamster Wheels. ther'es other stuff in this vein that's good too: orcs being english football hooligans is never going to stop delighting me, the tomb kings are a really cool concept, the vampire pirates (as far as i'm aware a CA invention?) are so fucking goofy and they rule so so hard.

overall though there's al ot of really really uncomfortable undertones to the world of warhammer fantasy. first of all there is the straight up racist shit, i love the lizardmen (i am currently deep into a mazdamundi campaign) and some of their lore is really interesting and in some ways avoids some of the common pitfalls of 'fantasy indigenous peoples'--it's made very clear they are an advanced society, technologically and socially complex, with a rich culture and history. but the lazy aping and blending of half-remembered maya/aztec aesthetics and the '''''funny''''' joke names they have and the fact that they are ancient and mystical and Not Of This Age just adds up to them being a really racist caricature of mesoamerican societies.

also WHF leans really really really hard into the biological determinism stuff. i love the skaven but the fact that they're a rapidly breeding menace that secretly infiltrates your cities and kidnaps people and gorge themselves on resources and have an Evil Religion and are As A Race predisposed to treachery and viciousness and are depicted as literal vermin brings to mind yknow the place all these tropes hold in the racist and antisemitic cultural imaginary and it definitely makes me kind of uncomfortable. i think the same can be said of the (also straight-up racist) depiction of beastmen as Tribes and Hordes that are very literally More Animal Than Human. like, there's so much of That Shit, of X Race are Biologically Fundamentally Like This, and the Like This often happens to coincide with a constellation of tropes used to demonize and justify the extermination of real people, and i really hate That Shit.

i also find the (also quite typical of fantasy) Order (Good) and Chaos (Evil) moral distinction to be pretty ideologically repugnant

so overall, yknow. mixed feelings innit. that said i'm having an absolute blast with TWWH2 this shit rules im driving my big dinosaur around and eating mother fuckers

[doublejango]

for @infinity-cantos, continued from here--

"Uh huh," Blitz said, stirring his drink idly, "right. Thievery is so much cleaner than murder. You just violate people's sense of security and steal their mementos and their fortunes. I deliver them to the afterlife they've earned." He took another drink, getting whip cream all over his upper lip. "Guess neither of us needs to lose any sleep over it, though." Even if it was fun to needle a fellow menace to society about the things they did, Blitz didn't fully believe she was that awful. It was Hell, why wouldn't there be someone ready to take everything good away from you the moment you let your guard down? That was what life was. That was all it was.

It wasn't like happiness was attainable or real, not beyond a fuckin' cute drink with your best friend's face on the cup, or a ten second orgasm, or sleeping in after canceling plans.

Don't get all fuckin' bitter, he told himself, briefly scowling.

Blitz licked his lip, then looked out the window, watching a group of Hellhounds pass by. They looked like tourists up from another ring, probably fascinated by all of the Sinners, all of the chaos of Pride. None of them were Loona, though, and so his interest faded.

Blitz looked back at Kaizaan. "So what's going on? We really run into each other by happenstance here? I probably shouldn't flatter myself by thinking that you need my help for something, so... what gives, am I your next target?"

A crystal, after all, seemed right up her alley. Not that the Asmodean Crystal could be parted from him, it seemed. Blitz had tried. Whether he had his glove on or not, the crystal was always there now, a part of his hand, his body. When he needed it to, he was learning to make it seem to disappear, but it was always there. He could feel its energy entwined with his, feel how intimately they were tied together. Stealing it might not work--at least, not while he was alive.

Sipping at his glittery drink, Blitz studied her eyes, wondering just how far she'd go.

[genderqueerdykes]

my gender is a Problem to everyone around me and i love it. i was born intersex and became even more intersex (i have at least three different variations for different characteristics lol and one was noticed at birth and two recently) and i identify as a boygirl and present very. Gender. like masculine and feminine extremely at the same time. and i use they/she/he and am transmascfem and i take so much joy in my gender being incomprehensible to cis folk. most people dont even know im not even a person too its so fun for me!! to be trans!!! and also like. yes the Suffering and such (ive had a major past w transphobia and intersexism) but that just makes me take more joy out of it because of spite. i love being transgendered teehee <33333333

ME TOO!!!!!! I'M GLAD YOU UNDERSTAND

my gender is a Menace and i'm glad you understand like. there's a euphoria in confusing people, in them not knowing, in people looking at you and going ??? i have No idea how to even begin to gender you. like you said, there's a lot of intersexism/transphobia in society and sometimes misgendering or people not understanding your vibes can be painful but it's literally also fun

it's literally also so, so, SO good when you can just be masculine and feminine and just be who you are and confuse people and leave them a little smitten. it feels so good when you can just be who you are and want to be and have FUN with it and enjoy the chaos, and embrace that strangers don't know, don't have a way of knowing who you are, and can't really know you in an intimate enough sense to truly "Get" your identity. it's alienating but it's also freeing

i'm so glad you understand the experience and i'm glad you're loving being who you are!!! i'm really glad i get to hear from other intersex and trans people who are living their best lives and being happy with who they are, that's the best gift i could ever receive!! thank u so much for sending this ask, i'm really glad you did, i love being transgendered and i'm glad you do too <3333

[maguro13-2]

Darkness Reborn ~ Origins of the Ink Demon Final Struggle (4/7)

Homura Akemi : So, you agree that I will put a stop to this evil meance you call him Lord Death, but he's actually a heartless.

Maka Albarn : You're right. I am absolutely a fool, always a fool to Shinra. If you're willing to make me risk own life, then I suggest that we start helping out.

Shinra the Devil Chaos : The girl's got a point, she's just risking for fighting with one's ideals, we need something that we could able to save Real World from this evil menace!

Tsugumi Harudori : Great Idea! We'll help you out! We'll help you out! I mean, the Ohkubo-verse is such a hot mess we caused! I mean, we got everyone involved because of or Demon Vibe perhaps. Please, we just wanted to be heroes, that's all we ever needed, Homura Akemi. Just give us a chance, and we'll never able to work for being under the influence of Shinra Kusakabe again! I promise!

Homura Akemi : Hmm? You got yourself a deal, kid. After all, you're still the same kids of the Ohkubo-verse who were all pawns in a corrupt, and it had to be you're fault, Shinra Kusakab or I say "Mr. Devil Boy".

Shinra the Devil Chaos : Alright..alright, this was entirely my fault that I made everyone from Soul World a complete arrogant asshole causing both humans and witches conflicting each other, the evil forces were just a divesrion by my creation, Death, who happens to be a heartless...(outbursts) THAT HAS BEEN A MAJOR ASSHOLE TO THE MAJO ORIGINATED BY INCA KASUGATANI!

Tsugumi Harudori : Inca Kasugatani?

Maka Albarn : You mean, that girl that you knew about...She originated the witches that the school has been conflicting them?! I'm gonna kill you, man!

Homura Akemi : URUSAI!

Maka Albarn : !?

Homura Akemi : Still having a freakin' attitude like that self-centered annoying vermin Black Star, always having the same attitude as their's. Boys like him are so selfish and annoying. It doesn't matter, since you four kids of the ohkubo-verse are no longer a trio, you'll be combining your efforts with the Ink Demon to stop an evil menace when you will arrive at the battle scene. But if you screw this one up, I'll take him out for you and then you will be exposed and expunged for being the so-called heroes of the Ohkuboverse. Understand me?

Maka Albarn : We...We understand.

Homura Akemi : Good now give us the final call. (holds out the Chaos Emerald) Just in case, I had to borrow this from a Black Hedgehog that uses jewels and guns that will make him to use the ultimate power that the Time Eater used. Now then, off to the Lands of Nevada!

*Sonic SFX : Chaos Control*

"Final Stage : Death Weapon Meister Academy"

*DBZ SFX : Big Aura+powering up*

Darkside Death : (chuckles) All the power of darkness and hatred flowing my veins, I must thank the devil for having gifted body of mine, all the hatred between Humans and Witches was simply my genius plan to rid of Ashley's people from existence. That Shinra Kusakabe was such a fool for having me as a creation of himself. I look forward to bring power to all.

*Sonic SFX : Chaos Control*

Homura Akemi : Alright, we're here.

Shotaro the Dokeshi : There he is!

[Master of the Universe - Sota Fujimori]

*DBZ SFX : Surprise*

Tsugumi Harudori : Hey, is it me or does he look small, in human-sized?

Inky Jr : Maka, right on time.

Maka Albarn : I've come to put a stop to this, Lord Death!

Shotaro the Dokeshi : This is the end of the line, punk!

Darkside Death : Humph. You blasted meddling Kids again, I see.

Maka Albarn : Lord Death, why on earth would you the cause the hatred between us humans and witches!

Darkside Death : To eliminate the need for sinners and heartless, is that we needed light and darkness to worry about each problems, and any responsibility for our own threats. And eventually, we will have the complete destruction in all of earth's structured society for conquest. So in any of Earth's society, there strict morals from the Devil's will, to annihilate a heartless or an enemy, we must conviently forget those morals from the Kasugatani. This hypocrisy is deplorable for you human beings that wanted to live in a universe full of weird and crazy stories that you wanted to be part of. If the author of four mangas have never made these stories or expanded the Ohkubo-verse, there will nothing left for us to bring the word madness to the Real World and the four of you should never become ultimate heroes.

Shotaro the Dokeshi : You're crazy! You made us all like a bunch pawns to your stupid corrupt game! Even if Ohkubo wanted a to be a weird guy to write these mad-ass stories he made. They're all just a bunch of make-believes that he made!

Darkside Death : (laughs evilly) Far from it, Kid! You see, our goals don't involve morals fulfiling with love. They involve winning wars again races like humans, witches, demons, and even the heartless their selves with death, destruction, and total carnage. That is the reason for the Ohkubo-verse's existence is what we truly think of ourselves to the universe! But enough, the time for talk is over! I'll dispose four traitors that despises the Ohkubo-verse in various ways.

Inky Jr : Don't push your luck to it, cretin! I won't be backing down!

Darkside Death : It's time that I will finally put you and those place.

Inky Jr : No...But this will do.

*DBZ SFX : Instant Transmission+slash*

Inky Jr : Ha! I finally got you red handed!

Darkside Death : Foolish demon! You have no idea with whom you are dealing!

[Master Contra (Phase 1) - Sota Fujimori]

Darkside Death : To think this is necessary for me, I'll give you the pavement to think humans are stubborn and arrogant, it's time that we plays fool's rule game, all in my effort of taking you down!

"Darkside Death : Heartless Reaper of the Kusakabe."

Inky Jr : Think fast before you leap!

(battle begins)

Inky Jr : You are really something don't ya? I underestimated of what a low-class warrior wanted to think that having Shinra's influence could make the DWMA stronger. But it's a shame that you couldn't even understand the true pain of your existence!

Darkside Death : For years, I have acquired the knowledge of my creator's ambitions about heroism and bringing evil to their knees, I despise that time when I realize that I let him and losing the hope that he found was none other than the light itself, and despair that the world tried to fall was simply darkness to conjure all that lives on this wretched planet.

Inky Jr : So what? If I'm done having the moments of Shinra bragging you about heroism, I'm surprised that you hid the truth from all the kids after the men of his influence that you ordered made humans and witches very arrogant to each other. Plus, I humbly accepted the knowledge of you trying to think witches were the enemies to you. But you got it all wrong, it's not about them, it's bout them and us demons as well. Humans, witches, and demons can get along too, ya know. So I bring no hesitation to heartless punk like you. Even your first son, Asura, couldn't handle the powers of a God. That's pretty low, I don't need powers to defeat a god, I can defeat one with all strength and my valorous effort!

Darkside Death : (snickers) You too seem to have yourself a point, I'm really appreciated that humans, witches, and demons can finally get along together in the equivalent exchange for peace, prosperity, and the future to this planet! I hope you and your brethren can feel the same fate as your own mother. She will complete that I made Shotaro the Dokeshi fooling her as a hero to all, that makes him another fool! Fool's a fool when it comes to the rules of a broken nature! Evolution provides the transcendence to achieve perfection and to fulfil their purpose on whether the keys that we may hold together in the pawn of our hands. Why don't we settle this and join our life long dream giving humanity to follow the progress that is inevitable!

Inky Jr. : You think that I was gonna settle this, I love to...BUT NOT!

(Scene goes in slo-motion)

*DBZ SFX : Broly Energy Charging*

Darkside Death : !?

Inky Jr : Demon...PUNCH!!!

*DBZ SFX : Strong Punch X4*

*DBZ SFX : Surprise*

Maka Albarn : N...No way...He...He actually did it. There's no way...he could've dodge his attacks in one singular blow, he really is Inky Albarn's son, a son that is worth to be king to all demons.

*DBZ SFX : COLLAPSE*

Darkside Death : ....

Inky Jr : Score one. (blows out his fist)

Darkside Death : (moans)

Shinra the Devil Chaos : Sorry to disappoint you, my creation. If you would've kept making humans and witches arrogant to each other, you would've made Ashley's people go extinct. Hope you will never see me again for the next 1000 years.

Tsugumi Harudori : Sorry to bother you, but I humbly thank you for your apologies, I guess I don't feel like working for the Kusakab'e man-made son anymore. Guess being a hero with a true story is way much better than my old one. Still, I don't have the ability to turn into weapon anymore since Shotaro bones would all make us human to think we absored the heartless energy, not the evil energy.

Shotaro the Dokeshi : Now who's ruler of the cosmos now, huh? You won't be ruler of Real World Au this time, Darkside Death.

Maka Albarn : As a girl who doesn't know about the world of Soul Eater, I'm thinking that it's finally time to move on and forget about that hero stuff that I was born to make! So you agree that we'll never be under the direct influence of Shinra Kusakabe himself? There's a better explanation to concern about your actions about bringing world peace to this planet.

Darkside Death (?) : (voiced by Todd Haberkorn) Well done, Maka Albarn. Sorry to keep the truth out of you, Maka Albarn. I knew that I wasn't much of a coward like you, that stupid demon bested me with one punch to defeat me. I guess I wasn't fit to become God of Death, I'm nothing more than a coward. I don't know if Liz and Patty we'll ever get back to me, I made that promise a long time ago.

Maka Albarn : Wait a second. Todd Haberkorn? That's Natsu's voice! Darkside Death doesn't sound like Natsu Dragneel, does he?

[The Barrier - Yutaka Minobe]

Shotaro the Dokeshi : Wait a second. I recognize that voice before.

*images flashing*

Shotaro the Dokeshi : That's right! I modeled him after Shinra Kusakabe when Darkside Death told me that I wanted a son to become the next Shinigami! Death the Kid! The young man that I created from my heart.

Maka Albarn : Heart? Did you say Death the kid was not conceived by anyone and is created just from heart?

Shotaro the Dokeshi : I had the responsibility to make him to be modeled after his grandfather, (to Shinra) Which is also you, Shinra?

Shinra the Devil Chaos : I have a grandkid, like a future grandkid that is modeled after me?

Inky Jr. : Not even a young man who's clearly made in birth, but made from both mind, heart, and soul.

Maka Albarn : So that means...(we then show Death the Kid's soul located inside the heartless)

*DBZ SFX : Surprise*

Maka Albarn : Oh no! Death the Kid, not you! How can this be!?

Shotaro the Dokeshi : I don't believe! Darkside Death was only Death the Kid himself! How can that be?

Darkside Death : I am impressed that you've been falling into one of my tricks. This was simply a form of entertainment, it's hardly to notice that the world of Soul Eater was connected by me all along! The fake is a fake, and the real one is real.

Shinra the Devil Chaos : You bloody turncoat! I gave you life, I created you! How can you do this to the Kusakabe Family!?

Maka Albarn : No! You're the real one...Lord Death?

Shotaro the Dokeshi : Lord Death? Wait a sec, that's the guy who enslaved me for years! I should've known it was that stupid prick that has been using me as a puppet to make Soul Eater's story a big cover up for him! [To Maka] And you! If this hadn't been for Shinra Kusakabe, we all would've listen to the truth!

Maka Albarn :[To Shotaro] Me? Why me? I had my influence to share with his!

Shinra the Devil Chaos : Hey, don't put this one on me, Girlie! You said that the editors of Square Enix that wanted to make you Shounen Protag Material. I wanted Real World AU would make you the coolest Shounen Protag in the world and that is the reason you couldn't, because humans think that they wanted to betray you. I'm sorry that my influence has spread across the world, making humans and witches be arrogant to each other and creating conflicts between them, that's why I created your world, your story, Maka Albarn. Ohkubo may have been a weird guy making weird stories, but he's not the fool that I said anything to him or he was, it's us! We're the fools, Maka! We human beings are nothing but spoiled stubborn brats is what being a hero or a villain is all about!

Maka Albarn : W-What?! We're we really...?

[Flashback - Ryo Yamazaki]

*various memories appearing before going pitch-black*

It's true. We we're the fools all along."

" It's a Fool's rule for fools."

" All of these crazy stories didn't were nonesene and make believes. "

"Where did the chronology of our universe makes a sudden end to these stories?"

So it's our fate that whether being a hero is never been that easy."

" I have a heart filled with valor and light."

" That is truly what I am, a hero to everything and to everyone."

~ 118th Scene : End of the Fool's game ~

[nat1nonsense]

Good morning I just wrote 2000+ words of ashrym fluff + hurt/comfort in one sitting because I’m totally normal about them, fic to be posted probably Friday or Saturday :p

[marichive]

𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐕𝐈𝐁𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐎𝐅𝐅 𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐒

A compilation of ridiculous things my and my friends’ muses have said to each other via wire rp. Change pronouns/etc. as necessary.

tw for light drug mentions, violence mentions, other non-PG shenanigans.

❝ I’m going to fight [name]’s boyfriend and none of you can stop me. ❞

❝ Uh, I think the fuck not.❞

❝ He’s a menace to society. ❞

❝ Respectfully . . . or not, idc, your kid’s being a little bitch. ❞

❝ Come sort your kids out, they’re being little shits again. ❞

❝ This is all your fault [name]. ❞

❝ He said I look like a chicken. ❞

❝ All of you are dumb as fuck. ❞

❝ Why are you getting banned from Applebees, bro? ❞

❝ We’re all consenting to this ass-kicking. ❞

❝ Are we about to Hunger Games fight for the family spot? ❞

❝ No one asked you low-grade John Cena. ❞

❝ Watch your mouth chicken shit! ❞

❝ Jokes on you I’ve been bullied my whole life this is nothing. ❞

❝ Maybe one day the crazy old dude will snap and try to drown y’all. ❞

❝ [name] is the brain but on cocaine. ❞

❝ Not your business. Only cool shit allowed. ❞

❝ We know what he allows over there, don’t we [name]. ❞

❝ Forgot how to use a condom once. Voila. ❞

❝ No one here understands shirts apparently. ❞

❝ Shut up noodle arms. ❞

❝ I asked you to have my back and you chose chaos. ❞

❝ What kind of fucking shoes? ❞

❝ You can full government name me all you want. ❞

❝ There can be no peace. ❞

❝ Sorry [name] I don’t speak stupid. ❞

❝ He stole my dad, there is no mercy. ❞

❝ I had a cute little bum and great hair. ❞

❝ Takes one to know one. “Please senpai [name], notice me! Shut up. ❞

❝ [name]’s about to McFreakin Lose It I can sense it. ❞

❝ Am I the drama? I don’t think I’m the drama. ❞

❝ Goodbye now [name] I’m over you. ❞

❝ You can’t quit me. I’m like an unwanted baby.❞

❝ Childhood trauma said otherwise. ❞

❝ If y’all had just let me fight him in the damn Applebees parking lot. ❞

❝ Even though I didn’t do anything wrong, I’m sorry about what happened. ❞

❝ Please come snap my neck. ❞

❝ Ew you and [name] are going at it. That’s gross. ❞

❝ This family is a FUCKING NIGHTMARE. ❞

❝ You don’t get a tattoo for someone like that unless you’re whipped. ❞

❝ I pray for that boy. ❞

❝ I’ll be sure to personally deliver these to your boyfriend. ❞

❝ It’s okay dude. It’s just a box of condoms. Don’t let it get to you. ❞

❝ Toughen us up? How? In the bedroom!? ❞

❝ Just take the trauma and get it over with jfc. ❞

❝ Wrap your willy before you get silly. ❞

❝ I’m choosing to ignore that bullshit altogether, thanks. ❞

❝ I just wanna know what they’re scheming about, so I’m scheming.❞

❝ I see simp, I say simp. ❞

❝ Can’t believe “Jiffy Lube” is the name of an actual company. It just sounds like someone found an alternative, horrible use for peanut butter. ❞

❝ “You’re so dramatic” yeah I just watched my brother’s dick get called a fucking aubergine. ❞

❝ I will bludgeon you with a crunchwrap. ❞

❝ Talking bad about myself is so fun dude. I hate that bitch. ❞

❝ [name] kicked me in the dick. ❞

❝ Did you touch [name]’s boyfriend’s nunchuck!? ❞

❝ What did she say? Does that mean “bitch”? I feel like it means bitch. ❞

❝ Does that mean Dracula was a secret fuckboy in the italian translation? ❞

❝ Headlight right to the dick. He deserves it. ❞

❝ You’re offering to let him kick you in the face? ❞

❝ I just said you shouldn’t fight a bear, you’re the one that made this personal. ❞

❝ I’m gonna hit [name] with my car. ❞

❝ WHY DID YOU INSTANTLY BLAME ME!?❞

❝ [name], tell me you don’t like [name] more than me and we’ll be good. ❞

❝ I don’t know what [name] wants, my dick kicked or a kiss. ❞

❝ A couple of virgins pointing fingers. ❞

❝ [name] and her boner can shut up. ❞

❝ Heard you had sex. Congrats you virgin. ❞

❝ Who are you swapping pants with? ❞

❝ No, not murder. I think. ❞

❝ First you think I’m mafia, now you think I have a ninja army? ❞

❝ Baby powder is a hell of a drug. ❞

❝ The other 20% is we all actually get along pretty well. Usually when we’re doing cool power rangers shit. ❞

❝ I’m gonna choke him out. ❞

❝ Would you be upset if I physically fight your father? ❞

❝ You told her to get DUREX? I’m going to kill you. ❞

❝ [name] be strong! Do it for Voltron! ❞

❝ You have violated the Geneva Convention I hope you’re happy. ❞

❝ C’mon [name]. Be there for your girl’s first weenie experience.❞

❝ I’m so horny and angry all the time. ❞

❝ I’m a short king so shut that down. ❞

❝ Any catastrophes today? Do I need to cause another? It’s too quiet. ❞

❝ If there are no problems I will make myself a problem. No one is here to stop me. ❞

❝ So the In-N-Out makes you jealous, but not the fact that I said I would tattoo [name]’s name on my ass in italian? ❞

❝ stfu you had a tiddy tat for your ex. ❞

❝ Now it’s a tiddy reaper thanks. ❞

❝ You guys wanna commit arson? ❞

❝ I’m not smart enough to leave. ❞

❝ The ancient philosophical question. How much simp should a good simp simp? ❞

❝ idk sounds like you just expressed intent to choke me. ❞

❝ I told a short joke and you made it about feet! ❞

❝ “Fragile princess feet” sounds like you know them intimately and I couldn’t blow past it!❞

❝ Never use the word “intimately” in my presence again! ❞

❝ I’m gonna go get banned from Denny’s you can either come with me and enjoy the chaos or pick me up afterward before the cops show up. ❞

❝ Because I am a wholesome innocent boy. ❞

❝ I guess I could shove some paper down his throat. ❞

❝ Fuck inflation, am I right? ❞

❝ I’m in your house bitch. ❞

❝ I’m tying your socks into a chain. ❞

❝ I’m the hot girlfriend? That’s so fucking cool man. ❞

❝ Stubborn gremlin, I’ll tell [name] to stop feeding you after midnight. ❞

❝ Squeezed my ass through this hole and idk how I’m gonna get back out. ❞

❝ Good morning, satan. ❞

❝ Your son did, bitch. ❞

❝ So? I’m a bad person! ❞

❝ Right line wrong person, bromeo. ❞

❝ Don’t “lol” me. ❞

❝ I feel like you’re trying to sneak in a lesson here somewhere but all I can think about is becoming an attack helicopter. ❞

❝ You put condom balloon animals all over my room! ❞

❝ Head empty, only angry, confused, and somewhat horny feelings. ❞

❝ Yeah look at you, with your fucked up internal organs. ❞

❝ I’m not insane I just ate an entire box of mini muffins by myself. ❞

❝ You had to get the most phallic looking one? ❞

❝ I did get kidnapped btw. ❞

❝ “uh, safe” doesn’t make me feel better bestie. ❞

❝ Jedi never get shit done anyway, they just sit and argue. ❞

❝ I made napalm by accident. ❞

❝ It’s the international emoji for ass. ❞

❝ That’s a cry for help if I ever saw one. ❞

❝ What’s a sugar daddy but like, the wholesome version? Fairy godmother? Can I have one of those? ❞

❝ That is an unholy combination of words. ❞

❝ I will literally fight you on your birthday idc. ❞

❝ The primary concern is what I refer to as “the Applebees effect”. ❞

[uwusenpaiuwu]

Baji Being A Menace To Society (And Your Relationship) 2.0

Sequel to: Baji A.K.A. The Worst (Best) Matchmaker

Summary: Baji’s at it again, acting out-of-pocket and creating chaos for absolutely no reason, other than to see you suffer. In his own Baji-esque way, of course.

Pairing: Sano Manjiro | Mikey x Male Reader

Warning(s): Boku no Pico is mentioned, but there is absolutely nothing graphic; mentions of masturbation

Note(s): I am so sorry if it isn’t funny. Sadly, I am but an amateur writer, not a comedian. Still, I hope you all enjoy! ^^

"(Y/n), want some ice cream? My treat."

Usually, you'd be the first to jump at an offer for a sweet treat, especially when you don't have to pay. However, as of now, the word 'ice cream,' when said by Baji, instantly triggers your fight-or flight-response. Paired with the fact that he’s broke as hell, your suspicions only increase for the sudden indulgence.

Since you know you're no match for the long-haired menace, your body automatically prepares to flee, legs twitching to lurch into a sprint. Unfortunately for you, just before you can get the fuck out of there, your hand is being grabbed by Mikey, who leisurely begins to tug you along to claim your dessert.

“You like ice cream, right?” he turns to ask, eyes unbelievably soft when looking at you.

And because you’re weak for him, all you can do is nod stiffly, trading in your sanity for the pleased grin that spreads across his face, his confident strides thereafter likely a result of him successfully remembering another miscellaneous fact about you, as has been the case since you officially started dating him. From the most trivial of things, like which brand of pens and pencils you prefer, to the slightly more important stuff, like ice cream being one of your favorite desserts; he’s made the effort of remembering them all.

He really doesn’t need to do any of that, ‘cause you’ll love him either way, but the conscious decision to do so is what makes you love him even more.

Zoning back into reality, you shake your head to reorient yourself. It isn’t the time to be going over the reasons why you’re such a lovesick puppy.

No, there are other things to worry about, mainly Baji.

You squeeze Mikey’s hand as you’re led to the nearest ice cream parlor to try and calm yourself. It works for the most part, especially when you get a reassuring squeeze back.

‘Right,’ you tell yourself, ‘it’s going to be okay.’

After all, Baji wouldn’t do anything too drastic, right?

~~~

You were wrong. So, so wrong.

Despite nothing having transpired yet, every alarm in your head is going off, pounding at the door of reason to get you to wake up and realize that it’s Baji you’re talking about, the same person that sets cars on fire when hungry and punches the first unfortunate soul he passes by on the street when sleepy.

You really should’ve listened to your survival instincts and ran. Alas, it’s much too late to escape, leaving you to wallow in your anxiety, while you wait for misfortune to strike.

And strike it does.

“Please, don’t sit next to me. You make me nauseous.”

“That’s cruel. I bought you ice cream, and you treat me like this?”

Yeah, he may have bought it, but you refuse to eat it because of how intensely Baji is staring at you. Fucking weirdo.

"Oh, do you want some of mine instead, (Y/n)?" Baji accentuates his question with a sensual lick to his ice cream from the edge of the cone to the finessed peak, making you extremely uncomfortable as he stares you down with the full motion.

As slowly as he licks his frozen treat do you slowly raise your middle finger, eliciting chuckles from the other occupants of the table.

You think you won that mini battle, though?

Ha! Nope.

Baji mirrors the vulgar action, not once breaking eye contact as he dips the tip of his finger directly into his ice cream, pulls it out, and proceeds to lick that, too.

Disgusted, you promptly avert your attention elsewhere, praying that Baji won’t continue being, well, himself.

Your prayers fall on deaf ears.

"It's cold!" As soon as the exclamation leaves your mouth, your blood runs glacial, knowing that you've unintentionally played into Baji's trap. The appearance of a sly, almost feral, smirk when you whip your head around to glare confirms what you already know.

The curtain has risen, and you’re standing center stage in a performance you can’t break free from.

"Aw, can't let it go to waste,” Baji continues, reaching over to scoop the ice cream you’re 100% certain he purposely spilled on the front of your shirt, with his fingers.

Then, to your horror and everyone else’s shock, he asks, without an ounce of virtue to his name, "Want me to lick it off with my mouth?"

Chifuyu is seated on the other side of the table, hiding his face in his hands. “Baji-san...”

"It'll stain if it dries like that." Dear God, how you wish to un-see Baji batting his eyelashes at you.

“I don’t care!” At this point, you’ve resorted to clumsily scooting your chair as far away from him as possible, which isn’t actually as far as you’d like considering your surroundings. Hell, so long as you put some distance between yourself and the crazy bastard that wants to see you suffer, you don’t mind having to force yourself halfway onto Mikey’s lap. (The firm hand that keeps you steady by the waist proves that your presence isn’t unwanted either.)

"Geez, (Y/n), you're such a scatterbrain."

Seeing Baji sell the line with a slow tugging of his hair behind the ear has you torn between laughing and dying a little more. Truthfully, his acting is frighteningly impressive, and you would’ve applauded his performance, if not for the fact that the role he’s playing still haunts your dreams.

By this time, most of who accompanied you to the ice cream parlor have figured out what kind of drugs Baji is on this time, which also means that those fuckers have seen, or are at least aware of, the cursed trilogy of questionable porn that’s being reenacted before their eyes, with you as an unwilling co-star. Those that are puzzled as to why people are shoving their fists in their mouths to refrain from laughing are obviously God’s favorites.

“The fuck is going on? I wanna laugh at Baji’s dumbassery, too.”

“Pah-chin... I think it’s best you don’t know.”

Interestingly enough, the one you’re most concerned about hasn’t said anything yet, splitting his attention between observing the scene unfolding and eating his portion of a deluxe sundae.

Then, out of nowhere-

“I understand.”

You and Baji freeze where you are, each of you grasping the other’s collar, you to shove him away, and him to draw you closer.

“(Y/n),” Mikey says, your name rolling silkily off his tongue in a tone much too fond for his next words, “if you like roleplay, just tell me.”

...

“Huh?”

“I’m fine with pissing, remember? So, roleplay shouldn’t be a problem.”

Heat rises to your face at an alarming pace, and it continues to climb as Mikey takes your free hand in his, which serves not to comfort but to unintentionally remind you of the humiliating experience from a few months back. And just when you convinced him that you didn’t want anything to do with getting freaky with the body’s excreta, too.

“You’ve got it wrong! I don’t- arfghfgh?!”

Your prayer to help cool down your flushed cheeks must have been heard, but you’re pretty damn sure you didn’t ask for Baji to shove his ice cream in your mouth!

“Oh, yeah. (Y/n)’s a fuckin’ geek when it comes to roleplay,” the unhinged bastard speaks in your stead, indifferent to the nails clawing at his hand clamped over your mouth. “You should try it with him. We were doing a scene from his favorite anime.”

Mikey tilts his head, interest positively piqued. “Which one is that?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know, leader?”

Mikey raises an eyebrow.

Baji opens his mouth.

You lunge.

It’s a series of events that happens in the blink of an eye and ends with loud crashing as you tackle Baji to the ground.

“Listen up, Baji Keisuke. We took an oath that day, and if you dare utter a word of what went down, I’ll consider that a breach of the code of secrecy and take you down, making sure you drown in a pit of your own shame and despair.”

Surprised to have been pinned down so quickly, it takes a while for Baji’s brain to catch up, but when it does, he’s frustratingly unfazed at the threat.

“Oho~ How scary. Too bad for you, I have no shame.”

“Not even if I tell Mama Baji where your porn stash is?”

That has the great Baji tensing up.

“You wouldn’t dare use an underhanded tactic like that.”

Your lips turn into a wicked grin. “Are you sure? I have as much dirt on you as you have on me, and like you, I won’t hesitate to use it to my advantage.”

If your grin is wicked, Baji’s is downright evil, showing off his sharp, gritted canines and all.

“You got balls, (Y/n),” he snarls, “but mine are bigger.”

The boy beneath you opens his mouth, and faster than you can stop him, he just...does it.

“(Y/n) (L/n) watched Boku no Pico and liked it!”

Silence.

Silence is all that’s heard for a good, long minute following the booming roar of the revelation.

You dare not look up to gauge everyone’s reactions, instead keeping your icy glare fixated on Baji, who looks smug as shit for having caused the glorious eruption of heat to spread like wildfire across your entire body, from the tips of your ears down to where your skin disappears under the collar of your jacket.

This...

This is war.

Taking in a deep breath, you answer his uncalled for declaration with your own thunderous shout of, “Baji watched Boku no Pico and jacked off to it! Twice!”

Baji laughs. “Oh, pray tell, saintly (Y/n), how many times did you jack off to it?”

“None of your fucking business, asshole.”

“Pretty fucking sure it is, since we were in the same room.”

Someone chokes, while you choke Baji.

“We. Swore. To. Secrecy. You. Asshole,” you practically growl, with each of your words accompanied by a ruthless back-and-forth shaking of the other boy’s person.

“Let up on the choking, dude. I’m not into that. You, however-”

Unable to take the ceaseless slander to your name anymore, you reel your fist back, but, upon seeing Baji’s cheek turned to you, jaw jutted out, as if inviting you to take your best shot, you hesitate. You know you wouldn’t be able to pack enough of a punch to actually leave an impact on him, which is terribly upsetting.

On the bright side, there’s still one tactic you can use that’ll be just as effective, a technique courtesy of your health teacher, who happily taught it to the class to use in case of an emergency.

Technically, it’s meant to be used to assess a person’s level of consciousness, but you suppose it can be used to get back at inconsiderate idiots, too.

“Ow! Ow! What the fuc-! Ow!”

You keep a straight face as you continue to rub your knuckles against his sternum, fully intent on delivering the worst possible pain to the current bane of your existence. It brings a sort of sadistic satisfaction to hear the ever prideful Baji’s screams of pain, and while it doesn’t completely undo the damage done, it does help soothe your wounded self-esteem.

“You want me stop? Beg for it.”

“Pissing, roleplay, choking, and begging? Goddam- OW!”

Your reign of terror comes to its untimely end when you’re lifted up into the air by the armpits, and through the haze of your power trip, you realize that Baji’s saving grace is Draken, who proceeds to carry you out of the parlor with ease.

“People are staring,” he coolly explains when you protest to having unfinished business.

Pouting, you cross your arms over your chest. “It’s his fault.”

Once outside, Draken doesn’t immediately put you back on your feet, until Mikey strolls out of the parlor. Only when the gang leader has his arms outstretched to you are you promptly deposited on the ground and taken into his embrace.

“Are you done letting off some steam?” is the first thing he asks you. Even though you can’t see his expression, the way he holds you and the way he cradles the back of your head, handling you with the utmost care, is indication enough that there will be no reprimand for, essentially, assaulting your division commander. (You would argue that it was an act of self defense against verbal harassment, but whatever.)

There’s just an overwhelming amount of love. So, so, so much love for each other.

“Yeah, I am,” you eventually answer, followed by a content sigh.

“Good.”

Naturally, that’s the perfect time for the tinkling of the bells above the parlor door to pilfer your attention. Baji’s appearance causes your face to morph into a scowl.

You cling tighter to Mikey, peeking over his shoulder to flip the ravenet off and mouth, ‘Go to Hell.’

As always, Baji answers your attempt to appear opposing with an obnoxious smirk.

‘See you there.’

~~~

“Boku no Pico, huh?”

“Draken, don’t laugh! Baji forced me to watch it!”

“All 3 episodes?”

“Twice.”

“...”

“...”

“Favorite scene...?”

“As if I’d have one.”

"Actually-"

“Ahh! Shut up! Why are you here, stupid Baji?! You live in the other direction!”

~~~

“Hey, (Y/n). Want to try doing the same thing with me?”

You look up, perplexed. Mikey literally just walked into the room, and that was the first thing he said to you.

“Do wha-?”

Your breath catches in your throat when you turn your head, only for you to come centimeters from bumping noses with him. And because he can, he lovingly knocks your foreheads together, too.

“It’s okay. I promise it’ll definitely be fun.”

You should feel ashamed for recognizing the same sequence of lines from Boku no Pico so quickly, though any coherent words are overtaken by an incomprehensible, high-pitched screech, a feat achieved solely by a teenage boy going through puberty.

A combination of shock and amusement crosses over Mikey’s features then. He’s never heard you make that sound before.

It’s cute. Strains the ears quite a bit, but cute.

While Draken lurks beside him, questioning Mikey’s standards of what constitutes as ‘cute,’ you’re sprinting across the room, red-faced, to Baji, who’s already grinning from ear-to-ear.

“Stop tainting my boyfriend, you piece of shit! Give him back his innocence!”

(Unbeknownst to you, whilst immersed in your fit of hysterics, your use of the word ‘boyfriend’ has a certain blond beaming.

“Did you hear that, Ken-chin? He called me his boyfriend.”

“Wow, congrats.”

Mikey either doesn’t give a shit or is simply too smitten to acknowledge Draken’s apathetic response.)

Baji blinks, unable to believe what you’re trying to insinuate. “Innocent? That little gremlin motherfucker?”

Both of you look in Mikey’s direction. When he sees you staring, he breaks out in a smile and throws a wave.

Your heart involuntarily skips a beat at the sight, and, okay, you’re convinced. Mikey deserves better than knowing of that cursed series’ existence.

Clearly, you’re down bad for Toman’s leader, and as such, Baji figures he can use that to quench his boredom for the day.

“Ooh, if only you knew what he gets off to.”

The tone in his voice instantly rouses suspicion. You narrow your eyes at him. “I don’t care what kind of porn he gets off to.”

“Porn? Nah, ya silly goose-”

“Don’t call me that.”

Baji ignores your comment as he moves to sling one arm around your shoulders, the other raising up to mimic an obscene tugging motion that no teenage boy is a stranger to.

“He jerks it to yo-”

BAM!

One second, Baji is lazily hanging off of your person, the next, he’s sprawled out on the floor, face down, and groaning in pain. You expect nothing less after witnessing him receive a rather impressive flying kick to the chest from Mikey.

Before you can assess the full damage, your view gets obscured by a pair of keys.

“Wanna take my bike out for a spin?”

Yes, you know Mikey is trying to divert your attention from whatever Baji was going to say, and, yes, you probably should check on the figure that has yet to get up.

But do you really care?

You take one glance at Baji’s concerningly unmoving body and quickly come to a conclusion.

You do not.

That being said, you quite literally drag Mikey and, by extension, Draken out of there, chanting an excited, “Let’s go!” on your way, abandoning Baji to wither on the ground.

Baji?

Baji feels betrayed.

~~~

"Chifuyu?”

“Hm?”

“Y’know, I was joking.” Baji flips onto his back with a grunt. “Man, who knew Mikey was all grown up?”

The vice captain of the first division hums, seemingly uninterested in his commander’s musings.

It goes quiet for a few minutes, the sole instigator of noise being Chifuyu flipping the pages of his manga.

Unpredictable is Baji, and the same goes for his train of thought.

“I should punch Mikey for kicking me.”

“No, you’d get beat up.”

“...”

“I should punch (Y/n) for Mikey kicking me.”

Truly, unpredictable and senseless.

“You’d still get beat up.”

Baji opens his mouth to argue.

“By Mikey.”

He promptly closes it.

“Fuck it. I’ll keep spicing up their relationship as payback.”

Sighing, Chifuyu closes his book to crouch down next to him. “Baji-san, with all due respect, you’re an asshole.”

Baji Keisuke has experienced betrayal twice today.

And he deserved it both times.

[themetalvirus]

(I might have asked this before. If I have, I’m sorry) What would Amy be like if she was also one of the Egghogs? (ALSO I LOVE YOUR AU SO MUCH AAA)

i have another ask abt this from a different person as well!!!! its a cool idea and ive also considered why she ISNT one in egghog canon (ALSO THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I APPRECIATE IT SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

amy isn't part of the Dysfunctional Robotnik Family in egghogs because she doesn't have an inherent connection to chaos energy, so eggman couldn't find or take interest in her at a young enough age to be viable for lifelong brainwashing. even if he did, he wouldn't consider her "worth it" as a baby because she's just. some baby

PIKO PIKO HAMMER TANGENT ZONE

she DOES still have the power to summon infinite hammers, but that's a different thing that i am choosing to not look too deep into because it's funny that she can just kind of do that.

also, the piko piko hammers she creates from hammerspace are different from the one she primarily uses! she can indeed summon infinite hammers, but she can't recall them back into her hands after they've been thrown, and they poof away if they leave her touch for too long. the piko piko hammer that tails built for her has a recall mechanism and also is a permanent object in the world instead of a cartoon construct!

her infinite hammers are also more prone to breaking and are more delicate, considering their tendency to poof away. they're also MUCH weaker to silver's tactic of just. grabbing her hammer with his powers and throwing it into orbit.

PIKO PIKO HAMMER TANGENT ZONE

ANYWAY. when egghog sonic first meets amy, she's smashing badniks with her hammer; he takes her RIGHT to eggman to ask what he should do about this. eggman looks at her and seriously considers if it'd be worth it to take on another child (her strength could be an asset), but she proceeds to yell at him for destroying a village and calls him a meanie. so it wasn't meant to be

if she was taken in anyway, i think her sibling dynamic with the boys would be Extremely Funny. just because they'd constantly wrestle and smack the shit out of each other and she'd be like 10x more angry. she's already a powder keg of rage just waiting to go off so if she was as poorly adjusted as the rest of the egghogs she'd be a unique kind of fucking menace to society

she also would have been old enough when taken away to comprehend that she could have had a Non-Eggman Life and would be Extremely Bitter about this, especially because her brothers think she's crazy for being bitter about it. basically she would constantly have stress migraines and it wouldnt be a good time for anyone involved.

thats all ive got because making AUs of an AU makes me confused and kind of takes away my focus from the actual main story, but if anyone feels like taking egghog amy and running then feel free because i think itd be fucking awesome and also funny and sad. and funny

[synnthamonsugar]

savathun for the accurate depictions meme?

Pick a character I am likely to have Feelings/Opinions about and I will give and explain the top five ideas/concepts/etc that I believe are essential to accurately depicting them.

Savathun's also a hard one to get a read on. A lot of these are more in the realm of ... concepts and archetypes and vibes that I strongly associate with Savathun rather than cut-and-dry traits that I headcanon her having, though you can definitely derive specific traits from these.

1. Tricksters. Granted, this is not so much a feeling as it is well-established subtext. Hell, Truth To Power elevated it to TEXT, all-caps, shouted from a megaphone:

Call me Coyote. Call me mantis, serpent, Cagn, Anansi, call me Sri-cleans-his-brother's-stomach.

Which like, okay, at the time I wasn't sure if this was accurate to her characterization, or Savathun trying to paint herself as the protagonist of her story, but now that we know she's stealing the Light and bestowing it to her people ... she is an archetypal trickster-culture hero.

I think that any accurate depiction of Savathun has to take into account those character types and what they represent: moral ambiguity, transgression, boundary-crossing, refashioning, disruption and redistributing power. Getting into and out of hard situations and suffering the consequences of actions, but never for long.

2. Transformation.

SHE GOT INTO A CHRYSALIS AND IS PUPATING INTO A MOTH. DO I HAVE TO SPELL THIS OUT.

But seriously, that every time we've heard from her she's been different - as Sathona, as a young Hive God slain by her brother to become stronger, as an undercover agent infiltrating a society to study their Wish Dragons, as Eris by letter (and the mask slipping and cascading through a set of identities before looping back to Eris again), as Scribe Savat, as a voice beyond an event horizon, as the Taken Queen, as Osiris, as a big honking chunk of amethyst who croons promises to us.

I like to play around with that idea in my written and drawn depictions of her, having her take different forms for different circumstances, be different things to different people. because that feels natural for her at this point.

3. Esoteric and occult practices, especially alchemy, which is best known for its pursuit of immortality and turning base elements into precious ones, but also dealt with the idea of spiritual purification, all of which are relevant to Savathun's story. That it's arguably the most "scientific" field of magic by forming the early foundation of chemistry is also important here.

I'd also like to give a shout out to chaos magic, which is a results-based branch of magic. Its rejection of absolute truth and objective reality, and its self-proof - that it works because the practitioner believes it does, free of any higher powers - feels immensely Savathun-y to me.

So I like to view and write Savathun as a scientist-magician, a witch, an experimentalist, a proof-writer and programmer of realities.

4. Family issues. As I've said before, I can't not read Savathun's departure from the Sword Logic and her sibling(s) as a metaphor for leaving toxic family situations. Especially when she's attempting to forge new, almost-familial bonds with people (Crow, The Guardian) which reads to me in the same sort of way as people getting out of bad family situations trying to find people of their own.

To that end I think she should have a kind of ... yearning, for her first life with her siblings, before the pact, for the world she destroyed, for the bonds forged and annihilated over the years. And for the life she could invent, for the friends and allies she could make.

5. Niceness. Not goodness but niceness. I think Savathun should always be friendly, always be helpful, even when she's doing the worst thing imaginable, because she's doing it for the right reasons. (Source: Savathun.) Her kindness is her menace, and her terror is her familiarity. There is no contradiction to her between being our friend and destroying us.

[thewildwaffle]

Hero & Villain (part 2)

A quick break from humans are weird, but here is a continuation of This Potstickers story. Thanks @nomadicsmurf for requesting this!

***

The suit makes the super. That’s true for both villains and heroes. Any old jokester off the street can do or stop crime, but if you really want to wreak havoc or save the day, it’s all about how you present yourself. Robbing a bank? You need a good suit. Catching a falling train before it crushes an animal shelter? You need a good suit. Finally making it to the grocery store? Well, you don’t need a good suit, but it certainly helps keep everyone at a distance and commands a certain level of recognition and fearful respect. If you’re a villain that is. The villain inspected two packages of chicken. They were from the deli and their weight and price were printed clearly on large white stickers. Not caring to make sure anyone was looking, because let’s be honest, everyone was trying to not look their way so as to avoid eye contact, the stickers were switched and the formerly more expensive package was placed in the cart. “What are you doing here?” a surprisingly familiar voice accused. The villain turned around to see the easily recognizable suit of the hero that had broken into the lair earlier. The villain shook the handle on the cart, making the contents slide around in the bottom for emphasis. “What does it look like I’m doing here?” The pair stared at each other, sizing each other up. Other customers kept peeking over to see what was going to happen while also trying to inconspicuously scatter to what they must have thought would be a safe distance if fighting broke out. Finally, with a sigh, the hero sighed and rubbed their temples. “Whatever. I guess you’re right. Again. Just… just don’t do anything… evil or whatever.” “Oh yes, because groceries are very evil,” the villain’s eyes rolled. “Aren’t you going to stop me from buying these potatoes to power my new evil plasma gun?” At that moment, the villain noticed the hero’s cart. The sarcastic smile melted into an annoyed frown. “Hey! What did I tell you when you left earlier?”

“What?” “Look at this junk!” The villain left their cart and started rifling through the hero’s. “Mr. Chuggles Cheese Puffs? Really? Fried chicken, white bread- you’ve already managed to squish this, by the way, giant bag of licorice, store brand bologna, baker’s dozen donuts, and is this… frozen cheese pizzas?” The three boxes were lifted out of the cart and presented pointedly as if to emphasize the disappointment. “You do know that the other toppings are free, right?” The hero grabbed the boxes and put them back into the cart. The villain sighed. “I did tell you to get real food, didn’t I? What, did your super hearing conveniently stop working?” “I’m just hungry, okay.” “Okay, I could just slap your stupid face. I knew you heroes were incompetent but dang.” The hero shot the villain a glare, which was parried by a soft shoulder shrug. “The first rule of grocery shopping, don’t go while hungry.” The hero’s stomach chose that moment to growl loudly. Dang, they hadn’t eaten since breaking into the villain's lair earlier and being fed those two potstickers. After they left, they’d been called away to help fight off a mob of angry mermen in a neighboring coastal city. “The second rule, always shop with a list based on the upcoming week’s recipes,” the villain continued and looked disdainfully into the hero’s cart. “What are you planning on cooking? May I recommend something with, oh I don’t know, vegetables?” It was then that they noticed the exhausted and lost look on the hero’s face. With a deep sigh, the villain pulled the hero’s cart over. “Here, come with me. I’ll help. Oh don’t look at me like that, I told you I’m a fine upstanding member of society now, remember? Plus, what's the fun of being a villain when your nemesis destroys themselves with a poor diet. That's my job, thank you very much. Except I would certainly be more creative about it.” It only took slightly more convincing before the odd pair were circling the store for miscellaneous ingredients as the villain helped to plan meals for the week. It also helped that the villain vaporized the hero’s already gathered foodstuffs. “I

know you’re busy, that’s probably why you’re like this anyway, you heroes are always thinking you’re such hot stuff for saving the day or what malarky, but you never stop to take care of yourselves. So we need foods you can make when you have downtime and then store for when you don’t. I’ve got a recipe for ‘Uncle Death Shadow's Super Dope Good Chicken.’ You can put it in the crockpot and have it cooking all day and it's ready when you get home. Easy peasy.” The store wasn’t crazy busy, which tends to happen later in the day and when people walk in and spy the suits. If it was just the hero, they’d probably swarm them and try to get an autograph or selfie with them or whatever, but pair that with the villain? People tend to make themselves scarce. That being the case, the wait for the checkout line was basically non-existent. “Good evening [villain name], how are you doing?” the girl behind the cash register chimed as they approached. “Just fine Stephanie, how about yourself?” the villain smiled at her while loading items on the belt. “You know each other?” The hero placed a divider between the two orders. “Uh, yeah, that happens when you actually go grocery shopping more than once a blue moon, go figure,” the villain scoffed. Stephanie chuckled softly and began to dutifully scan and/or weigh each item. The hero stood by the card reader to pay while the villain loaded the filled bags back into the cart. When prompted, the card was swiped. A series of two short beeps was the response. “Oh, sorry,” Stephanie frowned. “It says it was declined. Go ahead and try it again.” The card was swiped again. And again. Only beeps and a message on the screen saying ‘insufficient funds.’ “Uh,” Stephanie was clearly not comfortable but asked, “Do... do you want to try another payment method?” The hero patted themselves like they were checking their pockets, even though the suit didn’t have any. Or at least, it didn’t look like it did. Who knows with suit technology these days though. Pockets or not, the hero came up empty. “I… I don’t. This should work though, I, uh, I don’t know why it’s not. The money should be in my account.” “Well, well, well. Leave it to the Hero Association to mess up payday,” the villain all but sauntered over. “But then again, the old saying doesn't say that heroism pays. You know what does though?” The villain pulled out a Platinum Hoarders Cash Rewards card. “The saying is that crime doesn't pay. I don’t want your ill-gotten money.” “You wound me. Besides, I don’t think it’s really a matter of wanting, it looks more like a matter of nee-” A series of loud crashes and breaking glass interrupted. “HALT FOUL VILLAIN! YOUR DAYS OF TERRORISING THESE PEOPLE IS OVER!” All three of them looked to the front door where a menacing figure dressed in the gaudiest yellow, black, and red suit had flown in and knocked over at least two display stands and toppled a tower of honeydew. “Is that… Captain Inferno?” Stephanie had to stand on her tiptoes to see over the display behind her register. Her voice trembled slightly. Not much was known about the new and upcoming hero, but what was known wasn't always… stable. “How did he get out?” the villain grumbled. “That trap was stuck tight when I last checked it.” The hero turned to look, horrified, “you had someone else trapped in your lair?” “h, yeah, right after you left he broke in and got stuck. He was being a real jerk though, so I figured I’d deal with him later and left him there while I left to run errands and go shopping.” As the villain turned back to look at where Captain Inferno was storming forward, a fireball blasted past in a narrow miss. Screams erupted as the fire crashed into and spread along the shelf in the customer service department. The villain ducked into a defensive stance and glanced from the blazing shelf to the fiery hero himself. “Are you insane?!” From the way the fire hero nearly stalked forward, he might very well be. The villain really hoped he hadn’t gotten into any of the tox-N test vials that’d been stored in the lair. In retrospect, those

probably should have been moved to at least another room before leaving the hero - trapped or not- alone with them. “Am I insane?! You of all people have the audacity to ask me that? I know what you’ve been up to in that vile lair of yours and I’m going to make sure your latest project never sees the light of day, one way or another.” “Captain Inferno!” the hero's voice commanded both Inferno and the villain's attention. “What are you doing? You can’t just come in here and start blasting! I know you’re new, but this is completely unaccepta-” The sentence wasn’t able to be finished as Inferno shoved the hero back and into the end cap of the aisle with another loud crash. ‘Well, there you have it,’ the villain grimaced, ‘definitely got into the tox-N. He’s completely off his rocker. If he was ever on it, to begin with.’ Stephanie screamed and ducked behind the counter. Captain Inferno ignored them and the surrounding chaos he’d created and stepped toward the villain, heedless of the infuriated scowl he was being given. “How dare you-” another fireball was just barely side-stepped in time “-you are no hero. You disgrace the title by using it. And coming from me, that means something.” “Coming from you, it means absolutely nothing,” Captain Inferno nearly snarled. “But I’m going to make sure nothing else ever comes from you again.” The hero was back on their feet behind the villain but wasn’t quick enough to dodge the fiery blast from Inferno that had missed their intended mark once again. The villain had to rip their gaze away from the sight of the hero dropping to the ground and rolling in an attempt to extinguish the fire. The villain whipped back around. The temperature throughout the entire store felt like it dropped several degrees. How dare he hurt their hero. That was their job! Pure hatred leaked from the villain’s eyes as they landed back on the menacing opponent. “You've made a lot of mistakes today. Breaking into my lair, breaking out, following me here, being altogether a buffoon. But that? That was your last mistake.” Carefully, the villain shifted stance, arm tensing as it prepared to draw a weapon. “I’m going to disembark your intestines from... the rest of your body!” Captain Inferno frowned in confusion, then his sneer was right back. “Did…” he snickered. He actually snickered, “did you mean disembowel?” “YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!” The villain dropped suddenly to the ground to avoid Inferno’s fire punch attack and pulled out a compact multi-canon. Before the deranged hero could regain balance, the villain fired up directly into his chest, sending him flying high and crashing back through the drywall and plaster. Green smoke trickled down from the Captain Flame-sized hole. All eyes were dancing between said hole and the still-standing villain. Slowly, half-stunned, [hero] rose from the ground, the only traces of fire that remained was a broken trickle of smoke flickering up from their smoldering cape. The villain turned and looked up into the hero’s face as a gloved hand was placed on still battle-tense shoulders. The rage there slowly ebbed a bit when they saw the hero was well enough to stand on their own. The villain shrugged off the hero’s hand. “Eh. Must have had it on the wrong settings. Still, it looks like it worked.” The villain pulled their card back out without saying anything else and slid it through the card reader. A single ‘ding’ sounded. Payment accepted. “Oh, wait. Dang. I should have just had Stephanie ring up my stuff too and paid for it all at once. Oops.” Stephanie slowly rose up from behind the counter. The hero just stood, gaping at the villain. The villain took a few seconds to notice. “What? Oh, are you thinking what I’m thinking? Because I agree, I probably should just take my stuff anyway, right? As payment for my troubles. Yeah. You know what? I’m gonna do that. I think I’ve earned it.” Before anyone else could process and react to that, the villain pulled their cart forward and started walking toward the exit. “Wait, wait! Hold on!” The hero finally shook off the stupor and rushed

to stop the villain. “What was that?” “Uh, grocery shopping. Of sorts, I guess, as the case may be.” They stared at each other for a moment. “Oh, you mean all that with… yeah yeah, duh. I believe that was what they call ‘self-defense.’ Why you ask? Weren't you paying attention?” “You can’t just leave, we need to wait for the police. This is going to need to be reported.” The villain stopped and made a face like they were considering it. “Mmmmm. Nah. Gross. If you want to stick around, be my guest. You can tell them how I stopped that maniac from coming at poor Stephanie over there. Just remember, if you call me a hero, I will deny such titles. After all, I was just doing what any fine upstanding citizen in my position would do. I’m humble now!” “Upstandin- you yelled that you were going to disembowel him.” “I never said that. Captain Fire Pants over there, and now also you, I guess, said ‘disembowel’.” The hero made a face that made the villain roll their eyes. “Here, watch this.” They leaned over to call out, “Stephanie?” The cashier waved shakily at them. “Do the cameras in here have microphones?” “Uh, no?” The villain straightened up to look smugly at the hero. “Well, there you go. All anyone is gonna see on the camera is me saving the day. All anyone here can testify that they heard Captain Inferno say something about disemboweling people. Gosh, I’m sure glad I was here to save the day.” Now it was the hero’s turn to roll their eyes. “You didn’t save the day. If anything, you created the circumstances to make this mess! We need to wait for the authorities so we can make a report. You’re not going anywhere. Also, you didn’t pay for your stuff.” “Oh, and are you going to hold me here? Forcibly detain me?” The villain made a mock shocked gesture with their hand on their heart. “I still have my multi-canon, mind you.” “Is that a threat?” “Uh, yeah. Again, pay attention.” “What happened to you being a fine upstanding citizen? You said it’s been, what? Four days? You’re already ready to drop that act?” The villain pushed past and once again headed for the exit. “Oh sue me. It's not like it’s hard to pay off another jury.” The hero stood there, fighting between going after and making them stay, or going back to make sure no one else was hurt. That and the fires still needed to be put out. Their delay was all the villain needed to getaway. “If you have any questions about those recipes or need any tips about meal prepping, let me know!” the villain yelled out from the hover speeder rising from the parking lot. A quick check in the rear-view mirror showed the hero going back in to help in the store. Another easy getaway. The villain settled back and sighed contentedly. "Well, I guess the bright side is that I don't need to deal with angry fire britches when I get back.” The smile faltered a bit. “Although, the fact that he got into my stuff means I’m gonna have a huge cleanup to deal with. He better not have trashed the entire place or I'll make sure I've got the right settings on my cannon next time." At the hover speeder's pace, the lair came into view in no time. Getting around town was so easy when the only traffic you have to worry about are high-rise buildings and flight-capable superheroes. After parking and gathering the grocery loot, the villain stopped to consider the bag of potatoes they'd ‘not bought.’ "You know," they muttered quietly, "I just meant it as a joke earlier, but maybe I could use these to power an evil plasma gun. After I make some hash browns first, of course."

[angie-serpant]

—My irl friends out of context—

-TAKE YOUR PENIS BOOK AND BAKED LAYS CHIPS AND GET OUT

-Who’s that Pokémon? It’s always the gingers.

-Gingers (derogatory)

-Try for the backside of the donkey

-is it normal to want to platonically fuck your friends

-NASA's still fucking looking for that dick Niki

-I’ve actually just become god

-anyways that william afton guy was doing what he had to do to become immortal and yk what i don’t blame him🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 like sure he killed kids but like he unlocked immortality so🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

-shyummy

-this was payback for my Marcus Lopez rambles

-THATZ ILLEALY

-CHRIST???

-Does anyone else’s sneezes sound like explosions

-william afton is way too old. mans could sneeze and turn to dust. who’s letting peepaw run around killing people.

-Good for fucking you

-Wulti level warketing

-Demigirl? More like Demigod

-Emma you are a walking tiktok section

-The penis in the butt

-I’m educating you on kinks

-It’s okie you guys have socks

-He just randomly starts throwing people

-I wanna make out with some zombies

-I missed the ✨hole✨

-I’m not thinking I just don’t wanna do it

-My brother just walked in the door and called me a turd what in the Disney Channel Original Movie

-the yassifying of me, a 3 part series

-Mkay so should they talk more before that happens or just get straight into the chaos like a YouTube intro?

-G̶̬͌̈́́̄͝͠e̴̡͙͎̙̦̻̲͈͓̹̍͑̈̎̽̐̕͘ͅȯ̷̗͉̭̤̘͇̦̗̀̈́̌̏͑͝͝ḑ̸̧̙͈̖̬̣͚͇̖͔̲̲̳̓̌͂̉̀́̈́͝e̶̹͈͒̄

-ITS A SUSSY CHICKEN NUGGET

-I’m fucking one of our tables many holes

-STOP MAKING UNDERWEAR SEXUAL

-You are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life.

-reaperussy

-Look at his cute little butthole

-I saw gay I’m happy

-What the FUCK milk man!?

-I like big titties

-Who’s ginger is this? Somebody come get their ginger child!

-Cumtext

-We’ve adopted the ginger, say hello

-Thankedr

-Emma I’ve wanted to fuck to grim reaper too

-It’s like a magnifying glass but smarter

-HELLO POLICE IVE WITNESSED A MAKEOUT SESSION

-Ah yes, the color of horn-e

-You can touch my ass if you want

-Being gay IS fantastic!

-Why do we have those stupid ankles!? They’re useless!!!

-We have different temperatured fingers

-You’re not a very roomable person

-shush you’re a secret undercover ginger

-Wait what’s the ferrets gender?

-All hail the stinky noodles

-Foot emoji

-I LOVE TRUCKS AND BEER AND GUNS AND ALCOHOL AND WOMEN TIME TO SHOVE A FIREWORK UP MY ASS FIR FOURTH OF JULY

-I was scrolling through Tiktok and I did not expect to see a shirtless Bruno but here I am, utterly shocked, and needing soap for my eyes

-GUCK

-SIFRY

-The chess hierarchy

-I used to date my father

-New suicide method; shoving a firework up my ass

-*gasp* WHAT THE FRICK FRACK TIC TAC SNICK SNACK CARDIAC QUARTERBACK DUDE NAMED JACK BIG MAC LICK LACK BIG BACK DID YOU JUST SAY???1?1?1?1???1??1

-Either baby or menace to society

-I have committed vehicular manslaughter once

-their head? gone. their eyes? scooped. their hair? ripped out. their mom? fucked by me. their limbs? separated from their body. their soul? sent to hell. their neck? broken.

-only reason i’m not is because it’s cold and my dad would question me

-demigod more like i am god

-Fuck now im thinking of dirty shit

-should i write the most heart wrenching saddest thing ever and send it to a friend who did nothing wrong i’m just a writer with evil sad writing? The correct answer is yes brb

-how many sins can one commit in a family friendly game the answer is all 7.

-The lord cant help you here, this is horny jail

-snuck out. went out into the freezing cold. played in the snow rolling around yk like normal. men were staring at me. tried to call people. no one was awake so i did what any sane person does. flipped them off and continued playing in the snow occasionally showing i had a weapon on me and went inside when my hands were numb.

-I’m so cold my metaphoric dick could fall off

-Stop being Scottish

-……Would I fuck that?

-michigan was actually kind of a bitch

-I’m the sewer rat of the table monarchy

-Spit on the skeleton man

-Guys I just accidentally called a demon mama

-it was really quiet too and i just went “dick!”

-Well I would assume from the womb

-Don’t tell the Christians I said that

-I don’t think ghosts have genitalia

-fuckerino but okie

-Cleansed but casually

-The bar is low and they’re limbo dancing with Satan

-You are no longer the Virgin Mary

-White people scare me

-I think my dog hates white people

-Is that a picture of two robot toys having sex????

-Do not do anything related to genitalia

-water so cold my metaphysical dick had disappeared

-hath thou mother lie in bed with i? yeseth. yeseth she hath.

-fuck the celestial nap

-Holy shit godsona

-Penis

-Texas chainsaw yassacre

-Would getting your eye holes fingered feel good if you didn’t have eyese

-pussy poppingly good

-Why does he look so hot when he’s bloody?

-Fucking boogie woogies

-“i am vengeance” yeah ok i’m horny. next story.

-My underwear smells like orgasms

-cöckenbållen

-You just kneed my vagina

-You put the pp in the arse

-I’m almost done with that drawing of the pregnant lady

-Nah I’m gonna go listen to sad music and cry over dog shit some more

-I just imagined your father having sex *wails*

-I’m not touching your penis water bottle

-you pray to god in your hair routine?

-quench it deep

-I DO NOT HAVE A ROBOT FETISH

-i’m fucking one of our tables many WET holes

-Nah bitch is my love language

-I think it was the penis

-The angels are looking down on us in disappointment

-müsic mæn

-You are a gremlin you stole the wand of an all powerful wizard

-I can do the worm but I’m too embarrassed to

-My bed is in the sky now

-I think I stepped in old cum

-Ah yes, Oinherest and Ponterist, my favorite medias of the social

-That’s still repeating it dumbãss

-A sexy inchworm

-I know what skin feels like

-I promise I won’t moan again

-I DID NOT ASK ABOUT CAR GENITALIA!!!

-What if we’re all just sperm swimming in gods balls

-Keep your crouch away from my fucking ass

-I FEEL VERY GENDER

-i have rubbed off the gender

-Happy awakening hour

-i want death in the form of sex so that i can die an unvirgin

-As a person with a dick

-“Sexy” mmmmm dishwater😍😍🥵🥵🥵🤤🤤🤤

-I have a serotonin inducing concept

-Would you rather eat oven baked rotten potatoes or ask Jesus why he has no bitches

-That’s the last time- OW-

-I want it! BALLS!

-You have very disproportionate balls Killian

-Why are we talking about dick hair

-I want abs, I have a squishy girl body

-you should play the sexaginta-quattuordle

-I think a ghost just tried to fuck me

-titty stress balls

-i live paralyzing fear that im going to hit a grandmother with a car

-guys killian is thinking about tactical advantages to shoot me

-killian gets turned on by among us

-Oh it’s on the floor I’m gonna kill myself

-i would fuck myself- YOU ARENT ATTRACTED TO YOURSELF YOU ARE JUST SELF CONFIDENT

-oh no i forgot how to human

-I’m going to combust into a column of flame

-Imagination goes crazy when it’s 12.30 in the morning and you’re 📯🦵 it just goes to 100% percent

-I’m thinking about your mom

-i need someone to just take my spine out and play with it like a fucking cowboy rope

-That’s awkward❤️

-i’d rather solve one of the seven greatest wonders then solve my mental issues

-I feel my thigh bones expanding

-Oh my god kill. YES

-i’m a pussy, a bitch if you may, a coward as the youngins say, a weakling also

-dying is fatherless behavior

-minty bread

-It’s cuz your torso’s longer then mine

-THIS IS CRANBERRY ABUSE

-Oh I do Desire for that😙

-like ok oui oui baguette go fuck yourself

[writtenonreceipts]

Square One Pt 2

I got some ideas and thoughts on the background for the story.  I should have thought about all of that prior to posting but I can be really impatient. Ha.  So bare with me if there do seem to be slight inconsistencies between this and the first chapt.  Also, I am the worst outliner.  I am a discovery writer through and through--just a small warning haha.  

And then as soon as I say I want to write a multi-chapt fic I loose all inspiration and motivation.  story of my life...enjoy anyways...i hope

#

“I hate your boyfriend Manon,” Elide announced as she entered her friend’s living room with a glass of water and bowl of chips.

Manon was seated casually on her couch wine glass in hand and computer already settled on her favorite site to online shop through.

“At least he’s cute,” Manon said half-heartedly.  She took a long sip of her drink as she filtered through her shopping.

In the bedroom, Marion was snuggled with the “puppy” Abraxos and an ipad loaded with cartoons.  It was only Thursday but Elide couldn’t bring herself to announce no more television.  Especially if it meant having a brief moment of solitude with her friend.

“He’s making me be friends with Lorcan Salvaterre,” Elide said.

Manon snorted into her wine and gave a choking cough. “He’s doing what?”

“Apparently neither of our kids have friends,” Elide said.  She paused when a sudden wave of emotion washed over her.  Scowling at herself Elide shook her head.  “Dorian says it would be a good idea for Marion and Tavish to have playdates, become friends.  So now I have to be friends with Lorcan Salvaterre.”

Cackling madly, Manon threw her head back with a laugh.  The woman seemed to be enjoying this far too much.

“It’s not funny,” Elide growled.

“Oh yes it is,” Manon said. “Especially if we get a repeat of the fourth of July."

Manon may have found it hilarious, but Elide was struggling more and more to hold back on the emotion building in her chest. When Elide didn't reply, however, Manon went quiet which of course only made it harder for Elide to hold back her tears.

"Lide," Manon said in an uncharacteristically soft voice.

"It's fine," Elide insisted. She brushed furiously at her eyes. "I'm fine."

She didn't have to look at Manon to know that her best friend was about to call her a liar when the front door to the apartment opened and Dorian entered.

"Hey babe," he called out before he saw Elide. "And babe."

"No," Elide said, "you shouldn't call me that."

Dorian grinned before making his way to the kitchen and grabbing a beer for the fridge. "Where's the menace to society?"

"You're child?" Manon asked quirking a brow.

"It's a dog, and it's a demon," Dorian replied.

"Uncle Dorian!"

Dorian managed to turn just in time before Marion attacked Dorion, nearly sending him toppling over. Abraxos, a rescue pit bull with half a missing ear and plenty of battle scars scampered into the room to join the attack on Dorian.

It was enough chaos that Elide was able to forget her earlier rise in emotions and laugh as Dorian struggled to keep his feet and beer.

"Where was my hello this afternoon?" Dorian exclaimed with a laugh. He managed to put his beer up on the counter and scoop Marion in his arms.

"You're a teacher, I can't know you," Marion said.

Elide and Manon leaned into each other laughing heavily while Marion dictated all the reasons why she had to ignore him.

"And you're old," Marion concluded.

"I love your daughter," Manon said as she finished her glass of wine.

Elide couldn’t help but agree.  She watched contentedly as Dorian accepted Marion’s help in getting dinner together.  The unspoken agreement of the Havilliard-Blackbeak household was that Manon did none of the cooking.  And Elide was in full support of it.  She’d tried Manon’s cooking before and it hadn’t been great.

It wasn’t much later when Marion had finally collapsed from exhaustion on her mother’s lap and was in a peaceful slumber.

Dinner had consisted of grilled cheese and soup, both of which Marion declared were her two favorite things.  Ever.  Another reason that Elide decided Dorian was one of her favorite humans.  If he could get her daughter to eat something without complaining, he could do anything.

“Do you need us to watch her?” Dorian asked as he settled onto the couch beside Manon.

It took Elide too long to really grasp what Dorian had asked and remember what day it was.  “Can you tomorrow night?  They have me on a closing shift.”

“Of course,” Manon said immediately.  She tucked her head back against Dorian’s chest and nodded encouragingly.

“I can always Aelin too, I don’t want to bother you and Dor--”

Dorian cut her off. “You’re never bothering us.”

Elide could only nod.  There was an unspoken invitation lingering behind Manon’s words.  An invitation that Elide would never accept.  She couldn’t.  Maybe she was too stubborn, but there was something about accepting the help--the charity that she knew she would never get over.  Besides, Manon and Dorian had already done more than enough for Elide.  More than she would ever be able to pay them back for.

“We should probably go,” Elide said, running her fingers through Marion’s hair. “It’s a school night.”

“I’ll pick up Marion so you can go straight to work,” Manon offered.

“That would be great,” Elide agreed.  She carefully pulled Marion into her arms and stood. “I can give you money for pizza or something.”

“Hell no,” Dorian said. “We’re making our own pizza tomorrow.”

“We are?” Manon asked doubtfully.  “You remember what happened the last time we did that?”

“Well this time the damn dog won’t get on the counter and eat all the cheese,” Dorian said.

Manon grinned slyly at him. “You love that damn dog.”

“Not as much as I love you,” Dorian replied.

Elide let out a groan and moved to the door before they started jumping on each other. “You two are disgusting.”

Manon cackled loudly and jumped up to follow Elide to the door. “Love you, Elide.  I’ll text you when I pick her up from school.”

Elide flashed one more grateful smile to Manon before hurrying out to her car, Marion still deeply asleep in her arms.

#

“So,” Rowan said with a deep frown, “Havilliard’s making you and Lochan be friends?”

“Our kids,” Lorcan said.

Rowan shrugged and leaned against the kitchen counter of Lorcan’s place.  In the living room a cartoon was playing and Tavish was yelling along to it--something with power rangers or something of the sort.

“I still can’t believe the two of you have kids,” Rowan said. “I thought she went off to play soccer at Wendlyn University.”

“So did I,” Lorcan said.

He could remember the day she told him about her plans.  She’d said she was going to get the hell out of Terrasen and never look back. That no one was going to stop her.  Lorcan remembered that was the day he realized that he kind of loved her.  They were only seventeen and Lorcan was always in awe of her spitfire nature and her passion for life.  Even when her uncle tried to break her continually.

“I didn’t think she’d ever come back here,” Lorcan added, “let alone stay here.”

Not after what had happened near the end of their senior year.  What he’d said.  What he’d done.  But Lorcan pushed that thought aside.  Thinking about the past had never done him any good.

“Dad?” Tavish poked his head into the kitchen and blinked up at his father innocently. “Can we go visit Momma tomorrow?”

Lorcan looked at his son, confused.  It wasn’t completely an out of the ordinary request, but strange nonetheless.

“Of course, bud,” Lorcan said, “but you know your momma wants you to go to bed on time.”

Tavish’s eyes widened to an impossible size before he nodded sullenly and dashed through the kitchen to his room.

“How has he been?” Rowan asked quietly as Tavish began slamming drawers in his room to get ready for bed.

“He was barely three when she died,” Lorcan said, “it’s been what?  Four years?”

“Yeah but if he’s being distant in school to the point that the principal--” Rowan began, but Lorcan scowled at him.

“Havilliard’s an ass,” Lorcan said, “and is just looking for something to do.”

“Lor,” Rowan said softly, “you know he’s right.”

Lorcan sighed heavily as Tavish dashed back out of his room to the bathroom.  The water turned on and the brief sounds of brushing filled the silence.  Tavish skidded back into the kitchen, his shirt was on inside out and his pants were pulled on unevenly so the left leg was bunched around his knee and the right flopped over his foot.

“Uncle Rowan,” Tavish said “can we go to the park with Fleetfoot on Saturday?  Aelin said we could.”

“Maybe on Saturday, my man,” Rowan said, he flashed Lorcan a look, “I hear your dad has plans for you on Saturday.”

Tavish cast Lorcan a long look that could easily be interpreted as uncertain and disbelieving.

“Marion’s mom invited us to play soccer on Saturday,” Lorcan explained.  Though he tried, Lorcan couldn't quite hide the grin when Tavish smacked a hand on his head.

“Marion doesn’t even like rocks or worms dad,” Tavish said. “Why do I hafta be friends with her?”

“Because friends are good for you,” Lorcan replied.  It was the worst explanation imaginable and Tavish fixed him with a look that was so obviously exasperated and reminded Lorcan so much of himself that he actually laughed out loud. “Besides, it’ll be fun.”

Taish let out a loud groan and slumped off towards his room.

“I’ll tuck you in in a minute, bud,” Lorcan called after him.

“Good luck with that,” Rowan said under his breath.

“I’m not looking forward to the teenage years,” Lorcan agreed.

Rowan grinned and shook his head before heading out for the night.  It was a regular thing that Rowan or any of their other friends would drop by at any given time.  Lorcan had decided long ago that he would have an open door policy with his friends and Tavish.  His home was a safe place.  No matter what, Lorcan would make sure his son didn’t have the same childhood he did.  

As Lorcan entered Tavish’s room he helped pile the blankets on the bed, making sure they were tucked sufficiently.  He also had to make sure the stuffed animals were all properly arranged as well.

“Marion’s weird dad,” Tavish said as Lorcan brushed his hair back. “She brought her stuffed animal to school.”

Lorcan shook his head, deciding not to remind Tavish that he’d defended Marion’s choice.  Instead he posed a question.  “What’s wrong with being weird?  Everyone’s a little weird.”

Tavish sighed and squirmed in the bed, getting comfortable. “I dunno.  No one really talks to her.”

“Sometimes talking to people is hard,” Lorcan said.  He knew Elide had been the same way in High School, always quiet, always careful.  Until you got to know then the dam would burst and insanity would ensue.  Lorcan smiled softly and leaned over to press a kiss to Tavish’s forehead. “You don’t have to be friends with her if you really don’t want to.  But just try this weekend okay?”

Tavish nodded slowly.  “Fine.”

“Good,” Lorcan said.  “Do you want to read something tonight?  We can finish that Spider-Man comic?”

“No s’alright,” Tavish said with a yawn.  “G’night daddy.”

Lorcan kissed his son once more and stood.  He made it to the door before Tavish spoke again.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Lorcan said as he turned off the light and headed off to bed.

#

as always, thank-you thank-you thank-you for reading/commenting/reblogging. 

I have bits of the next chapter ready, hopefully by next weekend it’ll be done...

tags: Using my general TOG taglist and specific requests for this fic. Let me know if I missed you.

@tottenhamboys20 @morganofthewildfire  @aelinchocolatelover @more-espresso-less-depresso-xx  @bamchickawowow @bri-loves-sunflowers @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln

[callme-flower]

Lord Decibel just being Lord Decibel but these moments are created by me and i wish someone animated them(this _ will be used to separate the moments and i hope someone will comment on this)

Tiara:What do you exactly want?!

Lord Decibel:Money,money AND MORE MONEY!

______________________________________

Lord Decibel:FIRED!YOU TWO ARE FIRED!

Treble:But bo-

Lord Decibel:NO MORE EXCUSES!IT WAS JUST A SIMPLE TASK AND BOTH OF YOU FAILED AND I DON'T WANT TO HEAR EXCUSES LIKE "But that kid has alien powers" or "The another kid was too fast to catch"

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:Why should i hire you?

Tiara:Well...MY MAIN GOAL IN LIFE IS CAUSING CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION!

Lord Decibel:And your name is Sonic Blast?I like your ambition,i really do!But you don't seem...uhmmm....experienced

Tiara:I work for free

Lord Decibel:YOU'RE HIRED!

____________________________________________

Tiara:You should change your strategy BECAUSE YOUR PLAN IS STUPID,NO ONE WILL GIVE 1 BILLION DOLLARS IN JUST 10 MINUTES!I THOUGHT YOU ARE A GENIUS!

Lord Decibel:It's not my fault that people are stupid and can't complete a single task!

Tiara:You wanted to kill people

Lord Decibel:But i didn't kill them and that means i did nothing wrong because i didn't kill anyone

Tiara:You are a menace to society

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:Sometimes i think....people are stupid and that makes me feel better about myself.

___________________________________________

Lord Decibel:EVERYONE IS STUPID,EVERYONE SUCKS AND IS SOCIETY FAULT FOR MAKING ME EVIL!

Tiara:You just find cheap excuses for your imature behavior

Lord Decibel:YOU WANT TO SEE ME WHEN I FEEL MISERABLE AND I HATE MYSELF?!

Tiara:Have you considered therapy?

Lord Decibel:Why should i trust someone with my personal life?!YOU DON'T SEE THAT THE UNIVERSE IS TESTING ME?!MAYBE IT'S ALL A TEST!

___________________________________________

Lord Decibel:Sometimes i just want to give up and bury myself.I don't have evil plans anymore,i can't go to prison again because the only thing that was ok for me was the food.

I know i'm a selfish jerk,i'm aware that i hurt people but i don't have another choice.I don't have money,i don't trust people,my life was miserable,i hate myself and i can keep talking but if i do this conversation will get depressing

Gwen:*acts like a therapist*Do you have regrets?

Lord Decibel:I regret anything i did but i'm too stuborn to admit it and i wont admit it

____________________________________________

Helen:What are you doing?

Lord Decibel:I certainly don't have an existential crisis,how are you?

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:You know...when i was evil i was a real sociopath and now i regret it,but now i realized that i already have something much important than money.I have your friendship

Tiara:Awwwwwwwww

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:I don't understand why that singer is so famous,so rich WHEN I DON'T HAVE ANY OF THIS!MY MUSIC IS GOOD,RIGHT?!

Tiara:Yes!

Lord Decibel:AND I LOOK GOOD!

Tiara:You look fabulous!

Lord Decibel:THESE PEOPLE WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT GOOD MUSIC IS EVEN IF IT WILL HIT THEM IN THE FACE!

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:Helen,my old friend,my dear,my genius!I assure you that i'm no longer a villain,i got therapy and i'm really sorry

Helen:I know

Lord Decibel:Good!Now let's talk about capitalism and cryptocurrency!

___________________________________________

Lord Decibel:I just wanted to be rich!Am i asking too much?

Gwen:Yes!

Ben:Yes!

Lord Decibel:THAT WAS A TRICK QUESTION!

__________________________________________

Lord Decibel:You know...you are not stupid like other people.I'm glad that you are my partner in crime

Tiara:That means...you are keeping my secret?

Lord Decibel:I'm a villain not a traitor!

__________________________________________

Lord Decibel:I thought the most horrible thing in the world was a spoiled brat but being surrounded by idiots is much worse

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:*talking on the phone*Hey,Bass,Treble!You too are hired because i want to give both of you a second change and not because a certain person convinced me!*looks at Tiara*

____________________________________________

Lord Decibel:Maybe my plans are always failing because i'm not even trying because i feel emotionally tired and i'm a massive jerk because i don't want to seem vulnerable!I know that nothing can excuse my actions and i'm sorry i treated you like you're a useless garbage so...can we start over?

Tiara:If you are being a jerk again i'm leaving

Lord Decibel:I will take that as a yes

__________________________________________

Lord Decibel:DON'T TOUCH ME WITH YOUR DAMN HANDS AGAIN,STAY AWAY FROM ME YOU MONSTER!

Tiara:Jeez,i just wanted to ask you something

__________________________________________

(I forgot them so i had to rewrite them and i'm sorry,it was awesome in my head)

[strad-214]

Jedi June: Day 0 The Jedi Code

I am no expert on philosophy. I do not know every single scrap of wisdom that has been uttered by fools or scholars, though I have studied many. My best teacher was one that I have affectionately called “a walking fortune cookie”, for all he would do was quote to me Confucius, Sun Tzu, Buddha, Don Miguel Ruiz, Captain Spock, and Master Yoda whenever I would get lost or confused. He deeply studied all those names and their wisdom, yes, even the fictitious ones and especially Master Yoda. He and I both have a deep affection for Star Wars and we both see great wisdom in what the series can teach us as people to be people, good people. He was and is my teacher, my Jedi Master, and I his student, his Padawan. His philosophy as a teacher is and I directly quote: “I teach people, people, I just do it through music.” He is a music teacher and he was teaching me how to be a music teacher. I’m by no stretch a stellar musician, I never strived to be some prodigy… perhaps I should have, but that���s not the point of all this back story. Despite this, I have a great passion for teaching and I find a cosmic and celestial beauty in the study of music. I also recognize that we, the people of the waking world, are in dire straights to find success in anything we attempt to do. So, I as well will teach people how to be people through the study of music. My “Jedi Master” has had great success in making successful yet compassionate people out of his students and it’s not just due to his mastery of musical theory and practice, but it is because his philosophy is sound and he connects it to the discipline and regiment that is the practice of music. He teaches good practice for life through the practice of music, and in this manner, helps his students develop good practices for success in anything that they attempt to do in life. He has studied all those philosophers I mentioned, including the ways of the Jedi, to become a successful teacher. So, in my future essays, I will relate these two things often, such as I needed to explain all of this here.

As such and in summary, in my pursuit of teaching people how to be people, I as well have studied the ways of the Jedi and put them to my every day practice. Their moral code, as I have come to call it, is a simple mantra:

There is no Emotion, there is Peace.

There is no Ignorance, there is Knowledge.

There is no Passion, there is Serenity.

There is no Chaos, there is Harmony.

There is no Death, there is the Force.

Now, if only Sith deal in absolutes, then those are an awful lot of absolutes to be a Jedi philosophy. What hypocrisy! It should be thrown out the window! Let us find better teachers and people to study!… I write in jest. Some things are absolute, some things are not meant to be taken as literally as they are written. If that was the case, every society and belief system people belonged to would be nothing short of fascism in varying levels of severity and practice. Here’s what I mean:

When the Path of the Jedi became a popular read for deep Star Wars fans, everyone became incredibly obsessed with this moral code. They read that code and saw the Jedi as cold, unfeeling fanatics who deserved what they got. Everyone I spoke to and related to would tell me how much they would prefer to be a Sith, for at least the Sith were allowed to feel, allowed to love. Their defense is to look at the stoicism of Phantom Menace. The only thing I see in the Phantom Menace that resembles what they defend is people who remain calm under pressure, that's it. Did Obi-Wan not furiously strike at Darth Maul with vengeance at the death of his Master? Did he not also weep when Qui-Gon died? Did Yoda not grow frustrated with Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon when they both continued to insist that Anakin be trained as a Jedi? Did Obi-Wan not look like he felt betrayed when Qui-Gon would throw Obi-Wan’s training aside to teach this boy they just picked up on some desert wasteland world? What did Obi-Wan do in light of that feeling of betrayal, of all that hurt and vengeance? He took a deep breath and kept moving; he acknowledge those emotions and set them aside to achieve his goals: “There is no Emotion, there is Peace.” A moral code is an idea to live by, not a rule of law. We are an imperfect people, none more so than the Jedi, we just hold them to a high standard because there is a high standard that they insist on maintaining. But Jedi do feel, deeply. They are at times, quite ignorant. They do often act with incredible passion. They are all too often the agents of chaos. And they are quite physically mortal. How then is their moral code valid? What makes their code ethical and applicable? How can it be used?

This is what I will be writing about in my future essays concerning the Jedi Code: how it accurately applies to the Jedi way, examples of such, and how one can adopt those ways of life in the real world and walk it enlightened. Philosophy works best when it is combined with other philosophy, whether from the same source or from other sources, so I will be making several references to other philosophies as well. The focus will always remain on this Jedi Code and specifically how it relates to the Jedi’s most important Trial: The Trial of the Spirit. Without applying this Code to how we might Face the Mirror, then the Code serves no purpose. In this manner, I hope to show readers that the way of the Jedi is not very evil at all, but in fact very freeing and very empowering and very applicable.

Trust in the Force, all will be made clear, Padawans.

Happy Jedi June, May the Force be with you.

@jedijune​

[kuronanox]

Trapped - Aizen Sosuke

Everywhere I go he is always watching, everything I do he knows. Aizen is the monster nobody knows about even till this day no one believes what happen a 110 years ago.

"What do you want?" (Your Name) bitterly says to the 5th captain as he kindly invited himself next to her.

"What do you mean? I'm nicely taking a stroll next to you."

(Your Name) pushes him away from her as Hinamori came running from behind them. "(Your Name) don't you think you are being rude to Aizen Taicho?"

"We are simply messing around." He warmly smiles to his lieutenant and pats her head as she smiles back. (Your Name) stares in disgust at the scene in front of her. Although she never told Hinamori he was a bad man she gave hints to the younger girl. (Your Name) knew he was up to something but she didn't know what yet.

"Tch." (Your Name) said and walked away, although Aizen kept the smile on his face as he watched her walk away.

"Why do you hate Aizen Taicho?" Renji asks her as most of the liutenants decided to go drinking for the night. "I have my reasons." she simply stated as Matsumoto shook her head and wrapped an arm around (Your Name). "Don't tell me that you confessed your feelings and he denied them."

(Your Name) furiously pushed her away before chugging the sake bottle infront of her.

"Aizen! He isn't kind like how you all think he is! Neither is Gin and Tousen." she yells as it got dead silence as the liutenants started hearing other captains names in her mouth. "He tried to kill previous captains and liutenants for his own advantages! I'm serious all my friends... I witness them. They were covered in white and he was just smiling like a sadistic!"

There was no words coming from anyone's mouth and they all started laughing as she gives a look of disbelief "No one believes me."

"Looks like someone had to much drinks tonight!" Renji blurts out as Shuhei and Kira laugh along side with Rangiku, Ikkaku and Yumichika.

"Good thing Hinamori isn't here, or else she would have told Aizen."

(Your Name) just ignored their laughter as she plays along with them and decided it was time to get back to her barrack. "Goodbye." she tells everyone and exit the small pub.

Almost reaching the 13th squad barracks where she is currently the 3rd seat she felt a menacing atmosphere around her almost as a snake was watching her. "I know you are following me."

Gin comes out from the shadows and grin towards her as he raises his hands. "Looks like I got caught."

"Why are you following me?" she says now as he simply gets closer to her as she backs up towards the wall where he cornered her. "Nothing much, Ya know ya shouldn't be spreadin false rumors."

Before she could say anything Ukitake opens the door and his eyes widen. "Oh my! So scandalous." He cheerfully laughs and scratches his head lightly to break any tension. (Your Name) pushes Gin off and runs behind her captain.

"See ya (Your Name)!" Gin waves off as she peaks from behind Ukitake and snorts.

"Weirdo."

"(Your Name) I didn't know you and Ichimaru Taicho were a item."

"We aren't, It's just-" she stopped mid sentence and sighed before opening the door for their barrack. "It's nothing Taicho. No one ever believes me anyways."

Ukitake watches her leave and then looks at Gin. "People have been suspicion about him recently especially Hitsugaya Taicho." He sighs and makes his way towards Kyorakus place for some night drinking. "Good work!" He cheerfully said to a shinigami that was sweeping the floor as he passed by.

Little did he know Aizen was watching everything.

"I am the absolute, everything will be to my command."

Aizen says wrapping his arms around the back of her, as if his long arms were going to suffocate her neck. She tried to scream but it was only silence that came out. The pain of her throat burning was present.

She wanted to move but her body was stuck as he moved himself to face her. He didn't look like the Aizen everyone knew. His glasses were gone and his hair was slick back. This was the real Aizen. He smiled elegantly as he watched her struggled to let her voice be heard.

"As it should be (Your Name), a voice that can't be heard. No one ever believed you and very soon they will regret not listening to you... very soon."

She woke up in the middle of the night with cold sweat, her heart rate was rocketing. She hugged her knees and cried. She missed them, Shinji, Yoruichi, Kensei, Urahara all of them. She was determine to find them one day even if it met betraying the soul society.

She shuttered in fear. "That dream felt so real."

The following months passed and the soul society was hectic. (Your Name) learned that someone murdered Aizen. "It can't be real." She shutters seeing his body. She knew it wasn't real, everyone was placing blame on Gin but Gin was working next to Aizen. Kira and Hinamori were locked up for advancing towards each other and now she felt the menacing reitsu of Hitsugaya flow out.

"We have to stay calm and act together. It's not him!" (Your Name) screamed to Hinamori as the girl was fast to yield her sword and attack Hitsugaya upfront. The smaller man hit her to hard as she fell on the floor

(Your Name) couldn't tell why but she was frozen. Her body couldn't move and her voice wasn't heard again. She saw Hinamori collapse.

"Stop fighting." (Your Name) quietly says watching Gin and Hitsugaya.

"All of you are pathetic. Aizen... he's doing this to throw everyone off. The vice captain and captains shouldn't be fighting each other." She screamed at them. "Shh (Your Name) your voice can't be heard remember?"

The smooth deep voice whispered in her mind as she grabbed her head. "STOP MESSING WITH MY HEAD!" Her cold sweat coming back as she sees a blurry view of the two captain engaged in battle.

Finally getting up to attend the aid of Hinamori she saw a flash of Gin's blade moving towards the small girl. With (Your Name) reaching out for Hinamori she was about to miss saving her by a second.

A sharp blade collapsed with Gin as Matsumoto showed up to save the day.

The following nights she had nightmares, it was as if Aizen was creating them. He was torturing her. With Rukia's execution and the whole gotei against each other she couldn't keep up. She began to get stressed, and depressed. She needed to find Aizen and confront him. "I know he isn't dead, that bastard."

A rough hand had covered (Your Name) mouth in her sleep as she was dragged out of bed. Aizen in her view as she screamed only to be knocked out cold. The next time she woke up was with Gin as she sees a happy Hinamori embrace Aizen. "Hinamori don't do it, please don't do it."

She was stabbed like a pawn, she watched as Hitsugaya wrath got lost in control. Aizen defeated everyone. No one was stopping him from his goal. She looked at two bodies and central 46 laid on the floor just as he did 110 years ago. "You monster." She tells him as he held her chin. "I'm simply achieving a goal, there is nothing to be bitter about." He defends as she spits in his face. Unpleasantly his hand slapped her face as she saw the red blood coming from her mouth.

"Why didn't you just kill me all these years?" She then says as he shakes his head. "Because watching you suffer and torturing your sleep everything night was pleasing."

The prescene of Unohana and Isane joined the room as her suspicions of Aizen were right. Looking towards (Your Name) Unohana gave a sympathetic look towards her.

Aizen revealing his plans throws (Your Name) towards where the bodies were laid as him and Gin made there way to the hill. "I am in no use of watching you suffer anymore." Aizen then tells her.

Unohana ordered Isane to warn the Soul Society that Aizen was the real enemy.

"No one believed me till now." (Your Name) mustered up as the tears fall down. "It takes our world to be thrown into chaos for my voice to be heard."

"We apologize for the behalf of all Soul Society, we should have listened to your warnings years ago." Unohana says taking care of the injured Captain of squad 10 and lieutenant of squad 5.

"It's fine, what's done is done. I have to go to the hill and see everything for myself." She then says as Unohana gives her permission to leave.

At the hill Aizen was already captured, (Your Name) already knew he was going to escape though. Aizen was the mastermind of everything that had been happening. He looked into her eyes with a smirk. "I knew you would come."

She sneers in disgust, she wanted so bad to hurt him, she wanted Aizen to feel the pain she did all these years.

"To everyone in Soul Society today, I've been hiding my plans under your noses for years. It's such a shame that no one believed my dear (Your Name)." Aizen announces as Gin and Tousen stand beside him as they escape through a garganta.

"(Your Name) congratulations, you survived all these years. I'll be waiting for you in your dreams."

She shutters, he was still planning to torture her? No he couldn't but then again Aizen is the mastermind.

As everyone recovered from the days event, she was given an big apology from everyone. She didn't want that though. She wanted her friends back.

"Let's see how things turn out for you (Your Name), you never fail to amuse me." Aizen voice says in her head that very night she fell asleep.

(Your Name) lays in bed unable to move. Aizen was going to mess with her head till he was captured and dead.  "Stop messing with me." she whimpered in her sleep as she curled up as a baby.

The room was white, she mentally was messed up. The room was giving her so much anxiety, she was going to have a panic attack. "Shh, no need to be afraid. I haven't decided to hurt you yet." His voice echoes through the room as she tried to find a exit.

"Where am I?!" (Your Name) screams as he chuckles. "You are somewhere safe. Somewhere no one can hear you."

That send chills in her back, this place was not soul society. She screamed in agony and pulled her hair. "Let me out!" closing her eyes and opening them back up the white room was still in her sight.

Aizen opens the door to reveal himself, he held a calm smile on his face. "This is your new home, learn how to like and love it.

"Bastard, I'll kill you."

"Hmm sounds great, have fun trying." he playfully says and grabs her chin. "This will be your new wonderland where I'll teach you to only listen to me." Aizen seriously says then.

(Your Name) woke up with sweat on her face, her heart was racing. "This has to be a dream. Please let it be."

"I'm sorry but it's not." She hears Aizen voice as he sat beside her bed.

Her face set with horror. "How, When did I get here?"

Aizen grabs her face gently. "Welcome to your new home, I've been waiting years for this."

She was trapped, this was also his plan all along. To toy with her head and then to take her hostage once everyone believed her. "You really are a cruel man."

He smiles and leans on his hand.

"You will learn how to accept me at a matter of time. Now sleep, I have much to discuss with you later." The last haunting imagine of him was a menacing smile on his face as she fell into deep sleep.

(Author note: I’m sorry this is not my best work ;-;......)