#i am not saying eleven isn't her doctor

[expectiations]

once again, River's Doctor is any version of the Doctor who knows who she is. who knows that River Song is not just a name, it's a promise. a name chosen as a promise. much like how the Doctor is a promise too. who knows what River has sacrificed in the name of them. who understands why River's last words were "not one line. don't you dare."

the Doctor in the two parter opening for series 6 is still not her Doctor. no matter how much he may have flirted with her. he still doesn't know who she is. he still suspects she may have killed him. the distrust and doubt is still there. and the Doctor definitely doesn't like not knowing (sometimes).

[variousqueerthings]

I note that I don't, and I never, was much of a fan of doctor-and-rose as romance, but that I -- rather than get annoyed at the romantic-coded scenes -- had a tendency to simply read them from a totally different perspective, and really maybe should have been a sign of sooomething different about me, that I continuously felt that the doctor's concepts of connection must be so alien, that to call it romance would be to diminish the actual Thing that they had, which was presented as such onscreen (to my mind then, now I realise what was happening, but I prefer what I had going on), which is basically that the doctor was a shell of a person, hurtling towards destruction (he would have died without rose in ep1), desperately lonely and sad and traumatised, and she retaught nine -- and by extension ten -- how to love the universe, at the same time as nine and ten taught her the same. (I think about the scene in father's day, where while they're arguing, rose says that she knows how sad he is, and he'll just hang around the tardis waiting for her -- she knew!)

and then on top of that with sarah-jane (which, I never watched the classics as a kid, so I didn't have that context for her beyond what the episode presented) it felt like that was sort of confirmed and made even more canon through this idea that the doctor is constantly mourning the inevitable deaths of their companions and would rather simply leave them behind at some point than watch that happen (and they've seen that happen before, although dying for a cause versus just... dying, because you die, while they don't, they just continue on and on, always seeking connection, always knowing that time will take them away, that's a whole other thing)

and then of course there's ten's... I would call it "sex appeal" because it's david tennant and with his performance there's immediately a bit of a focus on oh he's quite pretty and he faints/is knocked unconscious in both of his first episodes, and a lot more flirting, and the people want to see sparks or what have you... but the doctor as portrayed and written is still... not coming at it that way. yes yes girl in the fireplace but also, once again, doesn't work for me, because I find it soooo much more interesting that the doctor would imprint on A Life - and a life that they admire -- and speedrun the exact thing that they're most afraid of with their companions... that she ages and dies and it's the one thing that the doctor simply cannot stop

meanwhile rose is quite young and swept up in this whole massive adventure and very much reads the doctor not as an alien (frequently surprised by their alien-ness) and gets jealous of sarah-jane as if she's an ex, and renette as if she's... a replacement? but really it's more that the doctor met her at the point when she was about to accept her life as it was. not an exciting life, not a bad life, but always having to ignore the idea that there must be more to it than this. and the idea that she might be unceremoniously dumped back in that after seeing just how This the this could be, of course that's terrifying. and of course she's simultaneously taken with the dashing doctor and the jetset life, and worried she could be replaced, because to her the doctor saved her at 19 years old. in some ways the doctor created her (considering who she becomes after dooms day)

contrasted to martha who initially has a similar kind of experience, but the doctor doesn't meet her at the space she's in with them -- ten is leaning on her, like they did with rose, but not giving anything back unless kicking and screaming and traumatising her whole family. martha's trajectory is so so tragic, because she barely gets a taste of the splendor versus the horrors and the latter marks her for life. but she also knows to walk away from those overwhelming feelings, rather than give into them, she knows they'll never be rewarded and she also grows beyond wanting to be a crutch for the doctor (the fact that she then ends up as a soldier, well... ouch)

and then of course donna, who never has those fucking awe-feelings to begin with and whose connection with the doctor is explicitly de-romanticised but never placed on a lesser pedestal as if there's a hierarchy of alloromanticism. topples those pillars, never sees the doctor as anything but what the doctor is. good old donna. (sobs.) (but also... cautious hope for the specials.) (but also sobs.)

my point being. just don't buy alloromantic doctor, they're a near-immortal alien. it's such a dull simplistic way of reading their relationships to other beings. other point being. all those women who were making heart-eyes at ten, wish they'd met thirteen and had a... "yeah, this still works for me," moment. their horizons, too, are broadened by seeing More. (that or they realise they were never actually "in love" but just thought ten was a sexy skinny little snack and it blinded them.) (although jodie whittaker, too, is a snack.)

and lastly lastly ofc, is that if the doctor has a longterm (by doctor time measurement) intense relationship with anyone, whatever that might be called, it's the tardis. and that relationship is also so alien it cannot be quantified by human words for concepts

[theajaheira]

so i am endlessly fascinated by the space river is occupying in her first episode with eleven. the doctor abruptly turns into the worst version of himself around her. she represents a lack of control over his own life -- he usually gets to pick and choose the people who enter it, but she is not someone he would have chosen to stay! she has an edge, she knows things that he doesn't, and she not only does not tell him but cannot tell him what those things are. she knows more than him in a way that he can't argue his way out of, and i would say that the eleventh doctor ESPECIALLY is not comfortable with not being the Specialest Boy In The Room. he's biting back because he wants to put river in her place and show her that she isn't actually as smart as she thinks she is, which is horrendous, but at the same time it is coming from this place of obvious insecurity.

and god help me, i thought i was not gonna get shippy with it (which was stupid because i have loved these two since middle school) but i think that the insecurity stems from the fact that he isn't her doctor. we saw that in her very first episode!!! she keeps on mentioning her doctor with all of these big cartoon heart eyes, and the way she treats him is very much "well, you're going to be him someday, so i guess i have to put up with you." i don't think the doctor is very used to smart people looking at him and finding him lacking in a way that is out of his control! and he's able to usually delegitimize the people who don't like him by saying "well, you obviously aren't smart and i don't like you either," but he doesn't have THAT to fall back on because he KNOWS that future-him trusts river enough to tell her his name!! so he is in this nebulous, horrifying space where his hearts are/aren't in the hands of a woman he does/doesn't trust, and he likes to be in control of his dynamics with other people. he wants to be the one who can get in his box and fly away. river is one of the very few people who can get through to him wherever he is. he wants soooo badly to show her that she's not as smart as she thinks she is because then he can prove that he's her doctor. and he hates that he wants that. so he tells himself and everyone else that he doesn't like her.

[thedepthsoffandomminds]

Episode eleven - New beginnings

Jack Dawkins x fem reader

"Y/n! Let her go, please." Jack begged watching as Arthur dragged you across the factory floor.

"How would you like it done my Lord? A clean cut, or shall we beat her?" Arthur asked the Lord sitting at the table.

"Oh why not rough her up a bit." He chuckled finishing his apple, he threw it on the floor and stood.

"Just make sure it's done." He said, straightening his waistcoat.

"No, you struggle against him, finding your feet enough to push yourself upwards. You take a quick breath and jump, lifting your legs into the air and knocking Arthur the ground. He shouts and grabs you around the waist. His fist collides with your stomach and you fall to the ground.

Seeing your bravery Jack musters all the energy he has left in him and fights against the two men breaking free of their hold. He rushes forward, kicking Arthur. You manage to crawl away as the two men scuffle. The large wooden doors burst open and the redcoats surround you all.

"Jack!" You call out to him but he is lying on the floor, face in the dirt. You see Doctor Sneed rush to his side as Belle drops down beside you.

"Get them out of here!" Your father shouts. One of the soldiers pulls you up into his arms and you hold on to him. Occasionally turning to search for Jack. You see him being carried by two soldiers. Sneed seemed to be holding onto his chest as they hurried. They placed the two of you into a small cart, Sneed jumping between you.

"What is it? What happened to him?" You ask trying to pull the doctor's arm back.

"y/n, he has been stabbed in the chest, his lung is perforated." Sneed explains over his shoulder.

"We need to stop the bleeding and get air back into his lungs without killing him." A new realisation paints his face as he looked at you, "That's your blood isn't it?" He asks.

You glance down at your chest, only now realising the pain you were feeling.

"yea- yes I fear my stitches may have come undone." You breathe out. Sneed nods at you.

"Okay, alright sit very still. Belle can redo the stitches when we get back to the hospital." He uses one hand to squeeze your shoulder and guide you to lie back. You move your hand around him and find Jack's. It's limp and cold.

"Don't let him die Rainsford. Please you need to do everything you can to save him." You beg.

"I will, y/n I will do everything in my power."

The hospital comes quickly and you're lifted out, your blood smears over the soldier's coat as he carries you in. Belle ran alongside him.

"Hetty, get the surgery ready! It's Jack, and we need a second bed!" She calls to the head nurse. Hetty beckons her nurses to her side and gets to work grabbing the equipment.

Belle pushes all the equipment off the table in the preparation room and has the soldier lay you down. Turning your head you see them rushing into the theatre with Jack, through the window.

Belle stands above you with the either mask but you push her away.

"No, no just do it." You say, keeping your eyes on the man you loved. Rainsford was above him, tearing away Jack's shirt.

"Hetty, here hold this, come here!" He directs the nurse to hold the cloth to the wound grabbing the second ether bottle and pressing it to a cloth.

"How do I do this?" He asks the nurse.

"Put it over his face." She instructs.

"Okay, okay, Jack breathe in as much as you can." He said softly. More people were beginning to pile into the room. Your mother and youngest sister stood at your head. Professor McGregor and several nurses stood around, each of them ready to help if needed.

The scratching of the needle piercing your skin threatened to overtake you, but you were determined to stay awake. You needed to be awake when you Jack was done.

"Okay, here you're done. Do you feel okay?" Belle asks.

"yeah. I'm alright. Thank you."

"Fanny, stay with her I'll get a wheelchair." Belle ordered. Your mother comes up beside you.

"My darling, please don't shut me out anymore. I am so sorry" she presses a kiss to your hand, tears falling from her eyes.

"Mother, I forgive you, but stop holding on so tight. We're big girls." You say.

"It's done. I did it. Jack? Jack come on Jack, wake up!" Sneed taps Jack's face. There is a moment of silence as everyone holds their breaths.

Jack draws in a long breath and opens his eyes.

"Y/n?" He asks.

"She is here, just relax." Sneed tapes his colleague's shoulder. Your father wheels you through to him. Your eyes meet.

*_"_*_*

"you must be so excited?" Fanny asked standing in your newly decorated parlour.

"the first dinner in my new home, yes I am. Though I'm nervous." You admit. It had been two months since the ordeal and you were finally feeling well enough to host your family for a dinner. Fanny had spent most of her time with you, making sure you were always happy and well. Sneed had chosen to make Belle a doctor in training, so she had spent most of her time at the hospital.

The door bell rings and your butler answers for you, it's Jack.

"Lady Fanny, would you permit me a moment alone with y/n?" He asked. Fanny smiled wide and walked across the room, she takes a small box from her dress pocket.

"You may need this." She whispers. Jack looks down and sees the ring he had lost the night he was taken. He thanks your sister then crosses to you. Jack pulls an envelope from his coat.

"Belle read this to me."

"Oh." You whisper.

"You were going to give me all of your money. It would not have been compensation for your life." His eyebrows knit together as he speaks.

"Jack, my parents were awful to you. I wanted only to.gice you the opportunity to make your own way. With that money you could have gone to America and opened your own Hospital." You explain.

Jack shakes his head.

"I could never leave here. y/n, I am done playing Bachelor. We are both now regained our health and I will be returning to my full hours of work. You should know that as a head surgeon the days will be long and I may have to stay late, but I promise that I will always come home to you. Should I need to stay, I will send word to you and never leave you wondering, " he takes a breath and holds your hand in his, "I didn't know that anyone could feel the way I feel for you. In all the fairytales love seems the most fantastical of them all, unachievable until you. You have bewitched me with your beauty, captured my mind and soul with your humour and intelligence. I love you and I never want to be without you. You are already living in my house." He laughs.

"Jack-"

"No let me finish. Y/n if you had died no amount of money could have persuaded me to leave. I would have sat at your grave until death came for me. Before everyone else gets here I want to ask you a question." Jack dropped to one knee, holding the ring in his hand, "Will you marry me? Your father already-"

"Yes!" You say falling into his arms and kissing him. Jack winces at the left over pain in his chest. He stood to his full height and slid the emerald onto your finger. He kissed you.

"Eeeeeee!" Fanny came charging into the room wrapping her arms around both of you.

"This is wonderful!" She squealed.

"Thank you Fanny, do you think you could let go?" You ask. She pulls back and runs out to greet the other guests as they begin to arrive. You and Jack cling to each other, your arm linked with his. Your mother, Belle, Sneed, Fagin, Rotty and Hetty made their way into the house. It would be strange without your father but he was travelling back to England. There he would give over the evidence for Oliver's arrest along with Lord Branwell's. The latter would be tried for attempted murder. Edmund would hopefully return with a new head of police.

Fanny wasted no time in telling them all of your engagement and though Lady Jane tries to hide her sneer she manages to congratulate you. Part way through dinner Rainsford began to speak

"Oh, I forgot my aunt Patuna is on her way here for an extended visit. My two cousins will be with her."

"How lovely, is that Gordon and William?" Lady Jane asks. Fanny leeks up at the names.

"Yes, wonderful young lads, Twins. William has recently finished his law training and Gordon is an officer in the army. We are hopeful he may wish to take a role amongst our growing police service here." He explains.

"They are older men?" Lady Jane asks.

"On the contrary, mother, both are barely five and twenty and unwed." Belle states, grinning towards Fanny.

"Oh how wonderful!" Fanny claps.

The rest of the evening is joyful, everyone enjoys each other's company. Your mother even has a civilised conversation with Fagin. At the end of the evening everyone returned home, leaving you and Jack alone.

"I start work again in two days. A scheduled operation for Mr Smithy."

"That's good. It will be wonderful to get back to normal." You agree. He reaches over and takes your hand in his.

"How are you feeling?" He asks pointing a finger to your chest.

"Much better, I had the world's greatest surgeon fix me." You laugh, "I'm tired, shall we go upstairs?" You ask.

"Upstairs. I grew up living in an attack with thirty other children and now I live in a three story house with servants. It's bizarre." Jack mused as you walked up the steps.

"You'll get used to it. We could always make it feel less large with the latter of tiny feet." You grin at him. Jack sighs,

"I...we should wait for your heart to grow stronger before we-"

Seeing the panic in his eyes you press a soft kiss to his lips, stopping his train of thought.

"Until you say it's the right time, then." You agree. Content and happy the two of you walk into your bedroom and close the door, unknowing of the men who stand at the window.

"It isn't the right time yet." Monks says.

"I narrowly got away because of him. I want to burn his world." Arthur Sikes growls.

@fandomfan-102 @darasloves @afalls14universe

[timeagainreviews]

Doctor Who isn't Dead Yet

Last month “Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga,” made headlines for having the lowest box office numbers on Memorial Day weekend. This is in spite of also being number one at the box office, just beating out “The Garfield Movie.” The movie was a certified flop, which is a shame because it’s stupendous (seriously, watch it sometime if you haven’t.)  I saw it a week after its release and already it had been relegated to the smallest theatre in the complex with only two screenings on a Friday. This small theatre had maybe eight people in attendance. To look at it, you would have to agree with those who say cinema is dying. It’s ironic then that Sutekh’s gift of death is what appears to have breathed a lot of life into my local cinema over the weekend.

To celebrate the Doctor Who season one finale, the BBC opted to show it in theatres across the UK. The screening began at eleven o’clock with “The Legend of Ruby Sunday,” and followed into midnight with “Empire of Death.” As we arrived, I saw many happy Whovians in cosplay buzzing with excited energy. The lobby was full of people in Tom Baker scarves and blue TARDIS t-shirts chattering away about their fan theories while they loaded up on snacks. The person dressed like the Fourteenth Doctor sitting in front of me was bouncing in their seat so much that I kept getting glimpses of David Tennant hair in my periphery. Needless to say, people were very excited. I don’t know if it was the fact that it was nearly 1 AM, but I did not see that same energy on the way out. So what happened?

It’s no secret that the overall fan reaction to RTD’s finale episode is one of being very underwhelmed. I even used that exact word to my friends on the way out of the theatre. I chose that word carefully. I didn’t want to imply that I hated it, because I didn’t. But after an entire season of build-up, I expected certain conditions to have been met. I’ve mentioned in the past that one of the benefits of this new midnight release schedule is that I often watch the episodes more than once. I find this helpful because the second viewing always allows me the opportunity to view the story divorced from my own expectations. But I have to ask- were my expectations so unfounded to begin with? Where did they come from if not the show itself?

Recently in an interview, Russell T Davies stated that he has been writing Doctor Who in such a way that it would generate a buzz on the internet. If people were talking about it, then maybe people would start watching it. While I am sure this method can increase engagement, it also has its shortcomings. Trickling information is all well in good, but when is it not enough? There is a point where teasing becomes more tedious than tantalising. Just look at Steven Moffat and Trenzalore- a concept that got so dragged out that by the time we finally got there, it was hard to care. Another downside is that it also raises people’s expectations to such a degree that it can be hard to meet said expectations.

Had this episode been written by Steven Moffat, we wouldn’t have picked up right back where we had left off. We’d have probably begun the episode on Agua Santina with the Doctor receiving the spoon from the kind woman. But this is more of a classic Doctor Who-style episode where the cliffhanger continues along. Last week I had guessed that Sutekh was a sort of trinity of Susan Triad, his jackal aspect, and Ruby Sunday. But as we learn in this story, not only is Ruby not related to Sutekh, but Susan Triad is no more Sutekh than Harriet Argbinger. That is not to say that she is any less dangerous in this moment. She holds out her hand to spread the dust of death which quickly begins to envelop London, then the world, and eventually, the universe, or at least the places where the Doctor has visited.

I rather liked the getaway scene with the Doctor and Mel. It was great to see Mel taking control of the situation. The Doctor almost feels like the companion following her away from danger. Her “Come on, cowboy!” line was so good. Once again, I really like what they’re doing with Mel in this season. The fact that she could have been this person in classic Doctor Who really annoys me that she wasn’t. While I grew to appreciate classic Mel in her own right, I’ll take modern-day UNIT Mel over screaming Mel any day. Bonnie Langford is coming here to Glasgow Film and Comic Con in August and I fully expect her line to be longer than when I saw her in 2015. She has been a highlight of this season and I fully did not expect to love her return as much as I have.

As the dust spreads through London, UNIT is still reacting to the presence of Sutekh wrapped around the TARDIS. Last week my friend said to me about Morris’ segway “How much do you want to bet that thing shoots lasers?” And sure enough, it shoots something. The UNIT team unload holy hell on Sutekh and Harriet, but nothing lands. Before getting in a little reference to her father, Kate Lethbridge-Stewart and her team are reduced to dust. Even the Vlinx’s head pops off, so not even robots are safe. Once again, the RTD2 era has borrowed from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. As Sutekh’s dust of death spread across the globe causing people to disintegrate, I leaned over to my wife and said “Mister Stark, I don’t feel so good,” in reference to the Thanos snap. Whatever. Marvel doesn’t own disintegration.

We see Mrs Flood and Cherry get swept up in the dust. Before she dies, Mrs Flood delivers some cryptic words that lead me to think she’s more than just a Time Lord but something far more powerful. However, she’s not so powerful as to avoid Sutekh’s gift. It’s hard to say just what is happening there, so I am not even going to attempt it. The Doctor and Mel find their way through the dust back to UNIT HQ where Ruby is still standing in the time window. Last week I mentioned that the memory of a TARDIS could become the Memory TARDIS from “Tales of the TARDIS,” and boy was I right. I love being right, especially after being wrong all season. I still want someone to be the Rani. At this point, they’re just messing with me.

Before we move along, I do want to call out an aspect of the dust scene that bothers me, and that’s Carla. Last week we saw Ruby tell Carla that she needed to either help or get out of the way. Historically, this would be where someone like Jackie Tyler would find some way to be helpful. I half expected a moment where it feels like all is lost until Carla comes out of nowhere like Ric Flair with a steel chair, saving our heroes from certain doom. It could have even been a self-sacrifice moment where she is still turned to dust. It would have been tragic and fuelled the Doctor and Ruby’s resolve. Instead, we see her in a cab on her way home after having witnessed her daughter's memories invoke the devil. What was even the point of her saying “Well, if your mother's part of it then, Ruby, you can tell her your mother is too,” if they do nothing with it? It felt so out of character for her to up and leave Ruby behind like that, and I feel like that lies solely at Davies’ feet.

It’s funny to me that in the lead-up to “Empire of Death,” people were saying “I hope they explain how Sutekh escaped the time vortex.” Mostly because it hardly matters, but also because they rarely explain how the Master or Davros escape death time and time again. Why is Sutekh any different? What is funny is that Sutekh escapes dying of old age in the time vortex by hitching a ride through the time vortex for thousands of years. Instead of dying, this just makes him stronger. He goes from an Osiran to a full-blown Titan. Sutekh reveals to the Doctor that Susan Triad was an aspect of the Doctor’s granddaughter who he had learned about while integrating himself with the TARDIS. He peppers these aspects of Susan throughout the universe wherever the Doctor lands. However, other than sharing a name, I don’t understand what Susan Triad has to do with Susan Foreman. They’re both brilliant and kind, but is this implying that Susan Triad is what the Doctor’s granddaughter might regenerate into? It’s a bit confusing.

After using Ruby’s memory to fully materialise the Memory TARDIS, the Doctor and his two companions escape Sutekh’s grasp, but even the Doctor senses that maybe Sutekh is keeping them alive. The visual of Sutekh sitting atop the TARDIS in his silent empire of death is an arresting one. I appreciated the sound design allowing the audience to really feel that silence. No music. No people. Nothing. Though on a scientific level, it does strike me as a bit odd that the entire universe is now dead. The Doctor may have had thousands of adventures across time and space, but I have to imagine there are countless planets out there which remained untouched by Sutekh’s dust. But I’m willing to suspend disbelief in this instance. 

After tying the Memory TARDIS together with intelligent rope, the Doctor, Ruby, and Mel, drift aimlessly in the Memory TARDIS. It’s uncertain how long they travel this way, but they manage to fit a costume change for the Doctor and an entire episode of “Tales of the TARDIS,” in there. Carrying a television screen still linked with the time window, we learn that the time window is still obeying Ruby’s commands as it had last week. Originally I had suspected this was because she was some sort of aspect of Sutekh, but as we have now learned, it’s simply Sutekh aiding Ruby’s search for her mother. After using the screen to explain to Ruby who and what Sutekh is, the screen also begins to show the Doctor and Ruby a way forward in the form of Roger ap Gwilliam. Meanwhile, Mel is being tracked by Sutekh through the dead cells in her body.

The scene on Agua Santina with the Doctor and the Kind Woman played by Sian Clifford was one of the strongest moments in the episode for me. We had watched the death wave spread across the earth, but this was a way to see how it affected people on an individual basis. Because the death wave happened at multiple points in time, we were able to see how it manifests from multiple angles. Having established the analogous relationship between time and memory, we can see how memory may begin to fade before life. People may still exist, but they won’t remember the name of their birth city because the person who would have named it died before they were able. But even more chilling is how the death wave doesn’t just travel up through bloodlines, but backwards as well. There’s an undeniable cruelty to making a woman have to experience losing her child before experiencing the same fate. It’s evil for evil’s sake and proof that Sutekh isn’t just an arbiter of death, but a demon as well.

The Kind Woman gifts the Doctor a spoon which he promises her he will use to save the universe. Fans of the Twelfth Doctor will have gotten excited by this promise as we’ve seen what the Doctor can do with a spoon. Instead, the Doctor uses it for metal, and possibly not even for metal, but for the memories within the metal. I found this all very weird as they literally showed Mel holding the Thirteenth Doctor’s sonic screwdriver which is not only made of metal, but several spoons. Was there really nothing on the Memory TARDIS with enough memory to jam into that TV screen? It’s a weird series of events punctuated by yet another weird occurrence when the Memory TARDIS gifts the Doctor with a whistle like we’re supposed to know why it’s significant. Nothing in the history of Doctor Who has been controlled by a whistle other than K9. Yet the Doctor puts it around his neck like it makes total sense and isn’t just some non-sequitur moment.

I said last week that I was waiting for “Empire of Death,” before I could fully know how I felt about “The Legend of Ruby Sunday.” Sometimes, a follow-up episode can enrich the experience of a previous story, while other times it can sully it a bit. You can imagine then my surprise when the episode that was sullied wasn’t “The Legend of Ruby Sunday,” but rather “73 Yards,” instead. My takeaway from “73 Yards,” was that the Doctor stepped on the fairy ring, releasing Mad Jack and setting the events of the story into motion. Ruby would then use the semper distans woman to scare away Roger ap Gwilliam and then again to save the Doctor. The Doctor doesn’t stand on the fairy circle, and Mad Jack never escapes. So if Roger ap Gwilliam still exists in the future, what was the point of any of of “73 Yards”? This doesn’t feel “wibbly wobbly, timey wimey,” as much as it feels “wibbly wobbly, shitty witty.” It just feels messy.

The Doctor tells Ruby and Mel that in 2046, DNA cataloguing became compulsory to anyone living in the UK. It feels on brand with Roger ap Gwilliam’s xenophobic platform, so no problems there. Meanwhile, Mel is being used like a spy, but the Doctor has been wary of her since she started appearing exhausted on the Memory TARDIS. The Doctor takes a blood sample from Ruby but just as they get a match on the DNA database, Evil Mel takes the wheel and transports them back to UNIT HQ leaving the Memory TARDIS behind. Finally, Sutekh has the information he needs to learn the name of Ruby’s mother. He will now learn how this unknown person has been able to thwart his gift of death and avoid detection.

What happens next is probably the weakest part of the entire episode. The Doctor and Ruby manage to fool Sutekh into thinking they are about to tell him Ruby’s mother’s identity, but it’s only so Ruby can get close enough to slap some intelligent rope around his collar. Why this feels weak to me is that it means somehow the Doctor and Ruby managed to squirrel away intelligent rope before exiting the Memory TARDIS. This means they would have had to do this without Mel noticing. And while I get that it’s intelligent rope, they basically pull it out of their asses because it’s nowhere to be seen. The fact that intelligent rope is a McGuffin that’s a callback to a pair of gloves many of us will have forgotten since the Christmas episode makes this moment all the weaker. The Doctor then uses his whistle in yet another McGuffin moment that allows him to control the TARDIS and shoot Harriet out the door. With the TARDIS finally back in the Doctor’s control, it’s time to take doggo for walkies!

The Doctor drags Sutekh through the Time Vortex bringing death to death, which causes life. Miraculously, if not luckily, people who we had watched die to the dust are now alive again. Colonel Chidozie is back. The Vlinx’s head is reattached somehow. And Cherry whose final memory of Mrs Flood was of her being cryptic and creepy is so happy to be alive again that she’s hugging the creepy old freak regardless. Cool. Not weird at all. Just people acting like real people. I don’t understand Cherry. She thinks the Doctor is trouble, but Mrs Flood is totally normal. What is it with these last two episodes and getting both Carla and Cherry’s characters so wrong? What gives, Russell?

The Doctor then does the right thing and cuts the intelligent rope, causing Sutekh to burn away in the Time Vortex. I guess this time it’s deadly because he’s not integrated with the TARDIS. That’s my best bet. I’m also willing to bet that the reason it snowed around Ruby and played Christmas music in her presence was due to Sutekh’s influence. He wanted to know the answer so badly that the memory manifested around her any time she got close to it. This is just speculation on my behalf, but it makes enough sense.

Speaking of Ruby’s birth mother (and not her real mother as they kept calling her) UNIT is able to find out who Ruby’s mother is, and she’s just some lady. I know some people were mad about this and I guess I can see why. There was so much emphasis on who her mother was that for it to be nobody special must have been a disappointment. Personally, I thought it was the least interesting mystery of the entire season. I get that she wanted to know who her birth mother was, but I was never emotionally invested in the storyline. The only thing that made it sort of interesting was the idea that there was a reason it was a big deal. You can’t feign surprise when audiences expect something to be big when it’s you who told us to feel that way. 

What I find strangest about Ruby’s mother is the way she points at the sign that says Ruby Road. First of all, why the hell was she standing like that? As body language goes, she looks less like she’s naming her child, and more like she’s marking the Doctor for death. Furthermore, why is she dressed like she’s about to hitch a ride on Shai-Hulud? But even weirder is how Ruby even ended up with the name Ruby. Ruby says “I always thought I was called Ruby because the social workers chose it or the paramedics or whatever. But, no, it was her.” But literally the only person who would have seen her pointing was the Doctor, and he left immediately after. So it really was the social workers who chose it or the paramedics or whatever. It feels less like she was pointing to name Ruby, and more like she was pointing to get the internet rumour mill buzzing. It worked, but at what cost?

Ruby finally meets her birth mother in a coffee shop. She’s a nice woman named Louise Miller who looks a lot like Lucie Miller, but I’ve learned my lesson this season with getting my hopes up. While Ruby and Louise embrace for the first time, the Doctor looks on remembering the granddaughter he left behind. Divorced from the hype, I’m fine with Ruby’s mum being nobody special. While I wasn’t a huge fan of Rian Johnson’s “The Last Jedi,” one aspect I really enjoyed was that Rey’s parents were just a couple of nobodies. It reinforced the idea that a Jedi can come from anywhere. Ruby doesn’t have to be anyone special for us to care about her. Unfortunately, so much of her story was tied up in this because ultimately, it did hurt her character development. I’d like to think that this is all part of the growing pains in finding a new equilibrium of fan excitement and good storytelling.

The Doctor knows he and Ruby must part ways. She has a whole new chapter of her life to explore and he would only get in the way. I mentioned after “Rogue” that Ruby was reminding the Doctor to embrace his human side, and here it is all over again. She has reminded him of the importance of family. He lets Ruby go because he can see that her need for a place to belong is greater than his need to have a travelling companion. Even if Ruby can’t see it right away, the Doctor is right. Their time together has come to an end. While Ruby has left the TARDIS, you do get the impression that we’ll see her again. There have been rumours that Millie Gibson has filmed some of season two, so don’t be surprised if we do see more of Ruby Sunday.

On a second viewing, I liked this episode a lot more than the first time. Like I said, divorced from my own expectations, I could see the episode for what it is. But the audience’s underwhelmed reaction is partly the fault of Davies’ machinations to get the internet talking about Doctor Who. He spends an entire season talking about the Doctor’s granddaughter Susan, but the only time we see Carole Ann Ford is in a flashback of her face with zero dialogue. We’re led to believe Mrs Flood is going to be something, but every time we feel like she is about to reveal some more information, she gives us more of the same tired bullshit she’s been doing since the first time we saw her. It begins to feel like television done in the same model as live service games. Keep subscribing. Stick around for additional content. Things trickle out over a gruelling pace. They gave us answers, but it feels like they could have given us more. Who was the Boss the Meep referred to? Is it the same Boss as the one giving Rogue so much paperwork? Will Susan actually appear at some point? Who is Mrs Flood and why is she always dressing like the Doctor’s companions? Instead, we learned who Ruby’s birth mother was, which, as I said, was the least interesting mystery of them all.

I do hope that these are just Davies and Co. finding their footing. The previous first season with Christopher Eccleston had a lot of experimentation as well. I somewhat wish that they had waited to see fan reactions before filming so much of season two. It might have done them some good to see people’s reactions to some of their big changes. I’m as rainy day a fan as rainy day fans get and even I felt they missed the mark on occasion. I think in trying to court a younger audience they lost a little of the essence of what made the show so appealing in the first place. Good writing and unique situations are the bedrock of Doctor Who. It doesn’t need to be Star Wars or Marvel. The fact that Doctor Who isn’t those things is why I love it so much. I can’t be alone in that.

The Christmas special is next. Followed by season two. After that, who knows? While Doctor Who has been number five in streaming drama, it hasn’t quite done the numbers Disney and Davies were hoping for. The show haemorrhaged viewers during the Chibnall era and even more when culture war pissants cried foul over trans actors and Davros redesigns. But it’s also just a symptom of the times we live in. Television is changing. People prefer short-form videos in portrait mode. The glut of streaming services is pushing away consumers while AI threatens to replace writers and artists alike. I’m reminded of Alan Moore when he said “I believe that our culture is turning to steam.” It’s important now more than ever that we continue consuming art made by real people. Regardless of whether you felt underwhelmed with the finale, keep watching Doctor Who. Show it to your friends. Host watch parties. Go see it when they play it in the theatres. Rewatch it when you’re feeling blue. Keep making fan art. Keep writing fanfic. Keep voicing your reactions, good and bad. Get over petty fandom squabbles. Because there may come a day soon when there is no new Doctor Who to get upset over.

[morbid-lycoris]

Reasons I hate "Mental health" tiktok

(keep in mind that these things are what I personally saw on tiktok and not everybody might have these experiences)

Self-diagnosing, tbh I am not a fan of self diagnosis, especially with complex disorders. I understand that not everybody has access to a diagnosis, but if you can't get a diagnosis, you probably can't afford treatment, and misdiagnosis can be very harmful.

Framing mental illnesses, especially ASPD as edgy and cool, I was told by doctors that I have traits of ASPD, but it's most likely my BPD, and I most likely don't have it. But I do understand that your average ASPD person isn't a serial killer with 0 emotions. And having ASPD doesn't make you cooler or less cooler.

Framing NPD or ASPD as inherintly bad, on the other side of the spectrum, everybody acts as if especially Narcissists are ALWAYS abusive, of course there will be narcissists who won't be good people, but every single group of people has that.

These "10 signs you have [Insert disorder] 😍😍😍" videos. They mostly have generic af symptoms, and most people will relate to like half of them. It's obviously just a very bad concept.

Fake-claiming, while there are people on tiktok who have been caught faking disorders, unless there is literal proof that they are faking it, its stupid to call them a faker. I see this, especially in DID spaces, where there are probably a few fakers, but that doesn't mean everyone is, and claiming that they are faking it, just because you feel like it, is dumb. Especially the people on r/fakedisordercringe on reddit.

Romanticizing psychwards, I don't know if that is still a thing, but it definitely was back in 2020/2021. And I was in different psychwards multiple times since I've been eleven. Sometimes, it was a very bad experience, one time I made friends, that I still have to this day and we had a lot of fun moments. But a psychward is not a fun holiday, and sometimes can be kind of traumatic even.

The "Mental health positivity" now this one is more of a me-problem I have to admit, but I recently saw a post where someone listed some things that make her "happy to have bpd" and like these things might have had to do with her bpd, but they definitly weren't symptoms, so idk how she is so confident in that these things have to do with her disorder. And as I read all of the things, none of them applied to me at all, which made me feel worse, also I never thought of my bpd as something positive because my life would probably suck way less without it.

The fetishization, I don't think I have to explain what's wrong with saying stuff like "I want a gf/bf with bpd 💖". Although I haven't seen this one as often luckily.

[thenotoriousscuttlecliff]

Saw a post earlier on basically saying that Donna was better than Clara (and therefore RTD better than Moffat) because she just instantly accepted the new Doctor whereas Clara didn't and it annoyed me such much because the situation are not comparable, and because I am just so sick and tired of people judging Clara for having a very real, very emotional, very flawed and human reaction to regeneration.

Clara knew about regeneration and had even met some past Doctors, but they were all nice, friendly, and praised her, and Clara loves to be praised (one of the many ways she's like that the Doctor), but her Doctor was always still there. He never went away. The he regenerated and quick as a sneeze he was gone and there was this stranger standing there, but he wasn't like the other Doctors she'd met, he was harsh, rude, angry, aggressively Scottish, criticised her (a big Clara no-no), and confused her with a potato. He was not in any way the Doctor she was used to, and she took that badly and had a very human reaction where she wished things could go back to the way they were before, that she could have her Doctor back. Like many going through a difficult time she longed to go back to when things were easy.

Now, to say this situation is like for like with what Donna experienced in The Giggle is just absurd. Donna didn't lose her Doctor, he was still there, he never went away, and the new Doctor was all charm, confidence, smiles and great legs. He wasn't being rude and confusing her with Mel because they're both ginger. So yeah, Donna was okay with all this because she didn't lose her Doctor and get and less friendly one in exchange.

The change from Eleven to Twelve was difficult for Clara, it wasn't meant to be a good experience, it was intentionally meant to show of regeneration isn't a pleasant experience for the Doctor or companion. Clara didn't react with calm rationality just because she knew regeneration was a thing, she reacted like a regular person would if they suddenly lost a dear friend and then had to share a flat with an prickly Glaswegian. And let's be real here, if Donna had been in 'Deep Breath' we would've been on Thirteen by the end of the episode.

[holly-the-trash-writer]

My Butterfly

Eleventh Doctor x Fem!Reader

Another request for you lovely, lovely people!

Synopsis: Reader loves butterflies. Isn't it just a coincidence that the Doctor has a room on the Tardis dedicated to butterflies.

Word Count: 805

A/N: On doing research for the fic I read that it is canon in an audio episode that Eleven had a butterfly room on the Tardis and I am obsessed with this idea.

Y/n grinned as she licked her ice-cream and the Doctor and her walked through central park hand-in-hand. 

“What if I dropped this right now and, I don’t know, Jackie Kennedy slips on it and never meets John Kennedy. What would happen?” 

“Well...” The Doctor raised an eyebrow at her, “Just don’t drop your ice-cream then.” He tsked, “You humans love to think bad of everything don’t you.” The Doctor shook his head, “Can’t you just enjoy your ice-cream without worrying about what would happen if you step on a butterfly.” 

Y/n gasped, “What would happen if I stepped on a butterfly? Would it re-write history? Would I fade away like Marty in Back to the Future.” She gasped, “Oh! Oh! Would-” 

The Doctor placed his hand over her mouth, “It would die.” Giving her a pointed look before the two started walking again. 

“I love butterflies.” she pouted. 

The Doctor smiled, “Well, I have got just the thing to show you.” he took her hand and pulled her along. 

“What is it?” Y/n laughed as he dragged her along. 

The Doctor never answered, instead he picked up the pace until the two were sprinting back to the Tardis. 

“Where are we going?” She asked as they entered the Tardis. 

She was confused when the Doctor ignored the console and jumped down the stairs, “Come on.” he waved her over before he started down the corridor. 

“Doctor?” Y/n shook her head before she ran after him. 

Coming around the corridor she slowed to a stop as the Doctor was waiting outside a room with a smug smile on his face. 

“This is one of my favourite rooms.” The Doctor grabbed the handle and turned it, opening the door for Y/n to step through. 

Y/n smiled as she walked past the Doctor and into the room, “Oh. My. God.” 

She was outside. Y/n was outside on a hill. A gentle breeze blew past her and the sky was a brilliant blue but being outside wasn’t the most amazing thing. 

The grass stretched out for miles, they were currently standing on a large grassy hill and to the left of them was a large meadow.  

There were butterflies everywhere. They were all different kinds, different species, all from different planets. 

“What do you think?” The Doctor closed the door behind him and stood beside her. 

Y/n’s jaw was on the ground, “I- You- Where-” 

The Doctor laughed before he sat criss-crossed on the grass, tugging on her hand until she got the idea and sat beside him. 

“This is amazing.” Y/n told him, “When did you get this?” 

“Long time ago.” The Doctor lay back on the grass, stretching his legs out, “Just been adding to it over time.” 

Y/n looked around trying to take in everything as fast as possible, “How many?” 

The Doctor hummed as he also looked around, “Billions.” He didn’t take his eyes off her as she held out her finger and a butterfly fluttered onto it. She turned to him smiling brightly before looking back at the blue butterfly. It was a moment so perfect that he wished he could freeze it and visit it every day for the rest of his life. 

“That is a Blue Adonis, only native in the Gardens of Papillion.” he pointed to the insect that was lazily fluttering its wings. “I remember a saying decades ago at the academy, how the beat of its wings in Mettula Orionsis caused a time storm in the Mutter’s Spiral.” 

Y/n looked at the butterfly in amazement. How could something so small cause a time storm of all things? 

“Do you want to know something else about them?” The Doctor sat up slowly so not to disturb the moment. 

Y/n nodded eagerly. 

He slowly reached out and took Y/n’s other hand and gently raised it, fanning out her fingertips, “They hate being alone.” 

Y/n jumped as five more of the same species fluttered onto her fingers. “They always need company, not doing well on their own.” 

Y/n smiled and turned to look at him, “Sounds like someone I know.” 

The Doctor looked at her, really looked at her. Sitting on the grass, a small breeze blowing through her hair, her hands raised as six butterflies were happily perched on her fingers. Her eyes sparkling as she smiled at him. 

How has he ended up here? Sitting in the Tardis, surrounded by butterflies, beside the kindest, most beautiful and most important human he’s ever met. 

No longer able to help himself he leaned forward and cupped her face, pulled her towards him and crashed their lips together. The butterflies fluttered around their heads as he poured his soul into the kiss. 

He continued to give her small kisses before resting his forehead against hers. Only two words coming to mind. 

My butterfly. 

[landojpg04]

Revenge on the Ranch II//G.Tillman

Index

Go read part one if you haven't already!

Synopsis: Rumor and Gator reunite.

Warnings: R*y Tillman, slight mention of how R*y treats his wives, language.

I woke up to the sound of pans clinging. I rolled over to see eleven am on the clock. I haven't slept in this late since my freshman year of college. My body feels rested. I feel rested. I walk into the bathroom to at least get ready if I’m making my appearance late.

But as soon as I was done, I walked downstairs. Momma and Dad were making their famous BLT sandwiches.

“Oh, look who decided to join us today,” Pops says as he sees me.

“Told you she needed to get food in her. We practically put her into a coma last night.” Momma said. I just chuckled at her antics. I looked around, seeing that it was eerily calm. 

“Where's the boys?” I said.

“Rhett is already doing his prep for tonight. Jane and Robert went to her doctor's appointment and took Rylee with them,” Momma said. I nodded as Pops handed me a plate of food.

“I bet the city doesn't have good BLTs like these.” He said, I took a bite and was sent to heaven. The city doesn’t have a lot. 

I spent a few hours just sitting with my parents. There was not much talking; they were just taking in one another.

Jane and Robert came back with Rylee. Momma is making Rylee, and I eat a plate of fruit and vegetables. 

It wasn't until two hours later that I noticed Momma getting visibly worried. She’s always like this when Rhett has a competition. She begins to pray, sweat, and at times send herself into an anxiety attack. Robert jokes that the entire process is Rhett’s good luck charm. If Momma isn't visibly upset, he won’t win. 

Rylee wanted to get ready with me, which I could not deny. I helped her pick out an outfit. Braided her hair and added bows.

“Sometimes she is a spitting image of you,” Jane says at the doorway.

“Begging to dress up, always speaking what's on her mind, and not afraid to get her hands dirty.”

“Runs in the blood,” I say, smiling as Rylee tries to get her boots on.

“Rylee, go help grandma and grandpa with the car.” 

Jane closes the door as Rylee runs downstairs.

“Your turn,” Jane says, walking up to me. She sits me down at the vanity and plugs in the curling iron. One thing Jane loves doing is hair, so this is like therapy for both of us. I talked to her about everything. Missing home, especially missing Gator. She tells me he comes by often to check in with my parents, her, and Robert. 

Gator would never verbally say he felt more at home under the Abbott roof. With the past of Linda, Nadine, and now Karen, Reese was the only mother figure who was a constant in his life. He saw how his father treated his wives and vowed to Reese that he would never do that, even if he didn't marry me. 

Jane and I continue to talk; I tell her about work and some of the cases I’ve helped on. I also complain about Vincent from the coffee shop.

She jokes, “Gator would kill him if you asked.” But deep down, I know Gator would do anything if I said I was uncomfortable with someone. 

Jane finished up my hair and helped with my outfit, and we were on our way to the grounds. 

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“You’re never round here anymore, Rumor,” Peter said to me. He was in the competition and grabbed me as I was looking for Gator.

“Yeah, well, I did move the day after graduation.” I was annoyed with Peter’s antics.

“Well, is there anything that could make you move back? Maybe someone?” He said, moving closer to me; I noticed he was trying to move his hat to fit onto my head sneakily. I begin to laugh at his foolish antics.

“You put that hat on her, Collins I swear I will break every single bone in that arm of yours.”

Right on time. 

I turn around to see the carrier of that voice. Still in full uniform, standing well over six feet. He has one hand on his belt while the other holds the top of his vest as he stalks over. Peter audibly gulps, standing in front of me.

“Move. Your pony ride is coming up.” He growls out as he is now standing next to me. Peter nods and frantically turns to walk away.

“What the hell am I gonna do with you? Not even a full twenty-four hours back home, and these assholes are already on the prowl for you,” I just shrug at his comment. I turn my body towards him. I wanted to take him in. 

His hair is slicked back, but I can tell it's longer. He smells like cologne and nicotine. I know he didn't grow, but with his work boots on, I feel as if I’m straining my neck a bit more to meet his eyes. He looks good. He notices me taking him in; he grows red in the cheeks and lets a small smile pass through.

“You look good,” I say.

“I look good because I knew my girl was back in town. Should've seen me yesterday; I was a mess.”

It was his turn to take me in. His eyes travel down and back up.

“Your hair got longer since I last saw you.”

He grabs my arm. I can feel what he is gonna say next.

“Did your Reese yell at you for not eating enough down there?”

“She's been feeding me as much as Rylee the entire day.”

He laughs. “You look good, Rue, “ he begins to move closer; I close my eyes and feel him ghost over my lips “You look good.” 

He finally pressed his lips onto mine. His lips were cold; they’d always been cold. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him in closer. 

Fuck did I miss this. 

He grabbed the loops of my jeans to pull me closer than I was before. I gasped at the maneuver and Gator took this to slide his tongue into my mouth. I could tell he was hungry through the way he kissed me. I can't blame him, though. 

For once in what felt like a lifetime, the world was quiet. There were no fears circulating in my mind. 

“Jesus, would you two knock it off! She didn't go off to war Gator!” 

And there it was, the one thing I wish would blow away in the breeze. Roy Tillman. Gator and I broke away from each other. I looked towards the voice. God, did he look worse with age.  

“Nice to see you too, Roy,” I said.

Roy never liked me from the moment I was born. Said I was a mistake my mother made. My father and he were good friends, almost like brothers growing up, but now the bond was too big to break. My father never shared the same values as Roy, but he knows that the thoughts and ideas Roy thinks are just a representation of generational trauma. 

Growing up, Roy always tried to tell my parents that my mouth was gonna get me in trouble. He hated that I was outspoken, especially towards men. 

One day, he talked about how he respected the army, navy, and peace officers, especially Federal Bureau of Investigation agents. I then spoke about how I also wanted to work for the FBI. Roy laughed at me for over an hour straight. The next day he woke up with all of his tires slashed. Still today they are looking for that culprit. 

“Heard you’re back for a few weeks. Quantico, realize you don’t fit the job description anymore?”

“Dad, come on, leave her–” Gator began to but in, but I never miss a chance to tell Roy to fuck off.

“No, Roy, they sent me up here. Said to start an investigation about a crooked Sherrif in a small town.” I said with a stern face. Roy went white for a minute, like the statement I was saying had truth behind it, but then he realized I was just doing his favorite thing, running my mouth.

He laughed and then grabbed a cigarette from his pocket, lighting up.

“You think you're funny, Rumor. You think you're funny.” He said, sauntering off towards the bleachers. 

Gator let out a laugh the second Roy was far enough to where he couldn't hear.

“I don’t think he’ll show up to our wedding.” 

“I think he’ll put me on America’s most wanted the day he finds out you're not a virgin,” I said, backfiring at his comment.

Gator just wrapped me in his arms, placing his lips on my head.

“How long do I have you for?”

“Rhett or Robbie are gonna drive me back next Thursday.”

“I can drive you back,” Gator said. I just nodded into his chest, not wanting to break our contact. Gator was my security blanket up here.

“I miss you, G,” I said into his chest.

I felt him squeeze me even tighter in his grasp. 

“You have no idea, Rue,” He said. I looked up to meet his eyes again. I could stare at him for hours. He had soft eyes that went dark, but right now, they were gleaming. He leaned in once again, meeting my lips—a short and sweet kiss. 

“Come on, let's go watch Rhett,” I said, unraveling myself from his embrace, but Gator didn't let me stray too far as he placed one of his hands in my pocket, something he had been doing since we got together.

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Author's note: Hope you guys enjoy the reunion, next part will be a bit steamy 😉

Lmk if yu guys enjoy or want to see anything in this series!!

[ornii]

Numbers Don’t Lie.

Jane/ Eleven X Male Brother Reader.

Summary: You express the want to see your presumed dead sister. Being another one of Brenners experiments, you were luckily able to escape years before it, growing up in Ohio, when you turned 18 you headed to Indiana, to find her.

December 23rd, 1984

It's been a few days or perhaps a week or two since the Snow Ball Dance and it's festivities, while it was a different experience for the kids, you felt the same in Indian High School in Ohio. It all felt so, nostalgic, but the addition of all the horrific and mostly insane things made a twist on it. But, out of all the horrific and Almost unbelievable things that occur in this town, there was one thing that made it worth it all.

Eleven.

After helping Dustin and his Prolific father figure, Steve, find his "Pet." It lead you on a journey to finding about the Upside Down, Demagorgons, and the truth behind Dr Brenners experiments, and most importantly was Eleven, still alive and very much kicking. After closing the gate for the last time you had time to get to know her just a bit more, about her journey the first time she met Dustin, Lucas, Will and Mike. Those times you were able to talk to her were heartwarming. After your spat and fight with the gate, and her Dress at the Snow Ball Dance, you ruffled her curly but small hair and finally felt somewhat at peace.

Giving you some semblance of a normal life with your little Sister, but unfortunately, not everyone was so accommodating about it. There was one person who didn't share your declaration of peace. Jim Hopper.

"Coffee, Two sugars, Spoon-full of creamer."

"Just Black for me."

"Got it chief." The waitress at the Diner walks off, leaving (Y/n) and Hopper at the table, across each other as the tension is a bit, high. The gruff and more experienced hopper glares at the younger and hauntingly mysterious (Y/n).

"So, what did you want?" (Y/n) asks, he leans back into the leather seating of the diner, calmly but smugly folding his arms, hopper looks more annoyed than most in this place.

"It's about Jane." He says, which causes (Y/n) to raise an eyebrow.

"Jane?" He says, Hopper reaches into his chest pocket and shows him a birth certificate, with the words "Jane Hopper" printed. (Y/n)'s eyes narrow to the name and he looks back up to Hopper.

"Eleven.. that's her name." (Y/n) says, but Hopper ignores that.

"Sure Pal, it's obvious that.. you know more about her, situation than I do. I don't know what those doctors did to her but it's obvious she isn't the most sociable kid." Hopper says and (Y/n)'s eyes look more sullen.

"Yeah. The, Test.. Experiments, shock therapy, we didn't go outside, we didn't get to have any contact with the outside world, we never even saw sunlight. I got lucky when my mom was able to pull me out of there, who knows how I would have ended up... but why are you asking? You don't seem like the type of guy to care." He says, and Jim shrugs.

"Who knows I might surprise you.."

"I Highly doubly it, so.. what do you want?" He asks, the waitress returns witu their coffee and places it, they give her a small nod of Thanks and she walks off, (Y/n) sips his sweet coffee and Jim spills it.

"Jane needs someone to help her control her powers, so you're going to help.. In Exchange, you can see her."

(Y/n) stops drinking his coffee, and slowly places the cup down and turns his cold eyes to Jim.

" "In exchange?" This isn't some trade of goods, and regardless I am going to see my sister." (Y/n) clenched the cup handle a bit tightly.

"Yes, in exchange, as much as you want to act like It, you aren't all of a sudden everyone's friend. You just popped up randomly with powers."

"Just Like her, Right?" He says back.

"I can trust her."

"And why not me?"

"She's a 11 year old girl, they're not good at lying, barely legal adults on the other hand."

"Well aren't you funny? I'm not going to play by some dumb rule to see my sister. You aren't going to stop me."

"This 41 Magnum says otherwise." He replies, (Y/n) could probably assume the handgun is under the table in his holster.

"You really want to try this Jim?" (Y/n) and Jim stare at each other. There was silence between them but the tension was so heavy, an intensity fills the diner, as their aggression whispers were promises of destruction.

"I've lost most of my family, I won't lose her too." He says, Jim sees the desperation and Sorrow In his eyes when he spoke, Hopper relents just for a moment and sighs.

"God Dammit... okay, it's true I don't trust you, but Jane.. she wants you to come over for Christmas."

"Christmas? Huh.." (Y/n) says, and Jim nods.

"Yeah, told me she wants it with her Family, with her "Papa and Brother.", and, if that's what the kid wants.." Jim says, and trails on. (Y/n) felt his heart skip a beat, a depressing warmness fills his heart and he nods. Holding back a few tears Jim can see him look down and sniffle.

"...I'd like that." He says. Jim's attitude softens, and stands up.

"Yeah... come over, I'm sure she'd like to see you." He says, and (Y/n) nods once more, wiping a single tear.

December 24th.

The Cabin was renovated to fit the lifestyle of a Preteen girl with powers and a rugged Old cop. A medium sized Christmas tree was planted on a big pot and (Y/n) and Eleven are setting it up.

"Okay, now, place the star on the top."

"Okay."

Eleven, using her powers lifts the star up, and places the plastic model on the top. He gives her a small pat on the back.

"There you go." (Y/n) gives her a smile, and Jane couldn't help but crack a smile. The two look at the fully decorated Tree adorned with Christmas foil and ornaments.

"Well, I guess that's that, you want some Cocoa?"

"Cocoa?" Jane asks, obviously confused by the term. (Y/n) raises an eyebrow.

"Cocoa? You've never heard of it? Jim's never given you any?" (Y/n) asks and Jane just shakes her head confused. He scoffs and walks to grabs his keys.

"Cmon." He says, Jane looks hesitant and fiddles with her fingers.

"We're not supposed to go outside." She says, and he stops.

"Jane, you've been cooped up in this place, Jim's out on some investigation, and who knows when he's coming back and I'm not leaving you here alone, Cmon.. I promise you'll have fun." He says, A bit convinced, Jane follows and they head to his car and out of the woods and into the city, he keeps Jane close as he shows her the snow, the cool winds and the festivities of Christmas. After shopping for the food for Christmas, and getting Jane a Santa hat, they return as she has a glow about her. Jim is still away, but that doesn't stop them or (Y/n), boiling milk in a pot on a stove he shows Jane the brown powder.

"Now. This is Cocoa." He says and she looks at it, obviously a bit confused.

"It's.. Dirt."

"It's Not Dirt."

"It looks like dirt."

"I know what it looks like—"

"I bet it tastes like dirt."

"No it's..anyway.. it's made from Cocoa beans, they grind them down and refine them into a powder. And you mix that powder into hot milk or water, and it turns it into Cocoa." He explains, as the milk comes to a small boil, he pours it into the pot and begins to stir, Jane watches with intensity and curiosity, as he finishes the brew, he can see the intensity that Jane is watching and finds nothing but amusement. He pours a hot up into a mug for him and another for her. Sitting down at the couch he hands it to her, and she cautiously takes it with both hands.

"Now, it's hot.. be careful and just take a sip." He says, and She does as told, she takes a cautionary sip, the rich flavor and scent of warm chocolate hits her sensory and goes overload, she stops for a second, her eyes going wide.

"Good, isn't it." He says, and she begins to chug it down and his face quickly turns to concern. She finishes and a deep brown mustache is above her upper lip and hands him the cup (Y/n) tries to stiffen down his laugh, Jane looks at his quizzically.

"What?" She says, "Do you want another cup?" He asks, snickering and she nods eagerly. He refills the cup and she continues to eagerly consume the cocoa. She finishes again with the same mustache and he tries not keep his composure again. This time she looks more frustrated.

"What's so funny?" She asks and he obliged.

"Okay, let me show you." He drinks a portion of his and forms his own mustache, he points which causes Eleven to giggle at it, he smiled so genuinely at her. She drops her cup on accident and it plummets to the ground, before it can shatter on the ground, it stops mid air, and slowly floats upward via (Y/n), who then takes the handle of the mug.

"Cmon, I got a few movies we can watch." He puts in a VHS of the classic "Gremlins." And sits next to Jane, who is a bit oblivious.

"What's a, Gremlin?" She asks and he elaborates.

"They're annoying little monsters that you can't feed after midnight. Trust me I think you'll really like it." He says, halfway into the film, Jane is asleep, most l due to the literal gallon of Cocoa she consumed. Resting her head on his shoulder, she sleeps so soundly, he looks over to her resting so calmly and he smiles.

"Lightweight."

Five minutes later, he's also asleep, his head cocked back and open. The door Jingles and opens to a grumbling Jim.

"I leave for one day and you two.." he says before seeing them sleeping so, soundly and calmly. His attitude lightens up a bit and he just puts a blanket on them, he checks his watch and raises an eyebrow, he looks at them sleeping so warmly.

"Huh, Midnight.. Merry Christmas."

[cicimunson]

Sweet Child of Mine Part 2

Series Summary: You’re Eddie’s former best best friend. The two of you drifted apart freshman year of high school and now you’re more enemies than anything else. Despite the hostility between the two of you, you still come around to help out with his eleven-month-old sister, Emma, who he and Wayne keep most of the time due to his father being in jail and his mother being an addict.

Chapter Summary: Your boyfriend is trying to get you back, but after he cheated, you aren't willing to give him another chance. He doesn't like the fact that you spend time with Eddie, but Eddie doesn't take any shit off him. Emma is still not feeling well, so you and Eddie take her to the doctor and get some rough news. You and Eddie reach a compromise, but how long will it last?

Warnings: sick child, doctor visit, mentions of blood and needles, Eddie is upset, Eddie is kinda a dick, you and Eddie argue.

Word Count: 2.3k+

Part 1|Part 3|Part 4|Part 5|Part 6

"Hey, where were you yesterday? I stopped by your place to see if you wanted to come to a movie with us, but your mom said you were out."

You look up from your book. Greg is standing over you with a scowl on his face.

"Don't tell me you were at Eddie's."

You sigh. "I help out with the baby, you know that. His uncle pays me."

"You should find another job. Besides, you spend the money buying stuff for the kid. It's like you don't make anything." He flops down beside you, tugging your book from your hands. 

"And if we were still together, I might listen to your advice. But we aren't, so you can mind your own business."

"Come on, don't be like that. Haven't I been punished long enough? I miss you."

"This isn't a time-out or a grounding, Greg. You kissed another girl. I'm not getting past that."

Greg raises his voice and you flinch. "I was drunk. It meant nothing! If you'll just give me-"

"Hey, we cool over here?" Eddie slides into a seat across the table.

You can't hide the gratitude on your face. The last thing you wanted was another screaming match with Greg in front of half the school.

Greg sneers at him. "We're great, freak. Can we help you with something?"

Eddie ignores him. "Emma still isn't sleeping well. And she's getting a cough. I'm gonna ditch last period to take her to Dr. Stevens."

"I'll come with you."

You expect Eddie to protest, but to your surprise, he nods. 

"We have a quiz last period." Greg points out.

"I'll schedule a make-up."

He shakes his head. "Now you're ditching class to help out with some kid that isn't even related to you?"

Eddie slams a hand on the table, his eyes darkening. "Don't talk about my sister."

Greg scowls. "I didn't say anything bad."

"Yet." Eddie snaps.

You stand up and tug Greg to his feet. "Enough, both of you. Greg, go sit with your friends. Eddie, I'll meet you at your van this afternoon."

Greg looks furious as he stomps across the cafeteria to his buddies. You know he's talking shit from the way they all look over at you and Eddie.

Eddie stands up. "Don't bother coming. I'm sure you'd rather spend time with your boyfriend."

"We broke up. And I am definitely coming. If you leave without me I'll just show up at the trailer and kick your ass."

Eddie tries to suppress a smile and fails. "Whatever. We both know you can't fight worth a damn."

The bell rings and you walk to the cafeteria doors together.

"Don't be late." He warns.

"I won't."

__________

You can hear Emma wailing as soon as you get out of the van.

Eddie sprints into the trailer with you right on his heels. Wayne is sitting on the couch, looking miserable as he tries to rock Emma.

"It's been like this for an hour now. I don't know what's wrong."

Eddie scoops her up, tucking her against his chest, whispering soft words of comfort.

"We're gonna take you to the doc and get everything sorted out Emmy. I've got you."

You make a few bottles and toss some diapers and wipes into her bag, adding a few toys and a change of clothes just in case.

Emma is calmer now, tugging on Eddie's hair and chewing on his necklace.

Eddie winces as she yanks a little too hard, but doesn't stop her.

"I'm gonna try to get some sleep before work. Wake me up when you get back and let me know what the doctor says." Wayne stands up and pats your shoulder. You can see the exhaustion on his face.

You glance over at Eddie and see the same thing. Dark rings under his eyes, stifling a yawn, looking like he hasn't slept in weeks.

"I could take her myself, if you both want to get a nap." You offer.

Eddie shakes his head. "No way. She's my sister. I'm taking her."

You and Wayne exchange a look.

Wayne. Help me out.

"I'm sure Y/N is more than capable of taking her to the doctor so we can get a little rest."

"I said no. I'm going." Eddie walks out the door without another word.

Wayne sighs. "I tried. I know he's just as tired as I am."

"I wish I could do more to help."

He pats your shoulder once more. "You've been a Godsend. I'm grateful to have you around. I know he doesn't show it, but so is Eddie."

I doubt that, but it's sweet to hear.

"Thanks, Wayne."

You hurry out the door to the van, helping Eddie buckle Emma in.

"I got it." He mutters. "I got her."

"Don't be mad. I was just trying to help."

He glares at you. "I told you, we don't need help. I can take care of her just fine. You can go back to your jock boyfriend and your airhead friends anytime you want. We don't need your pity. You don't have to keep slumming it with the freak."

"Stop it. That's not what this is. I care about Emma, Eddie. I care about Wayne, and despite how difficult you make it, I care about you, too."

He gets into the driver's seat and doesn't say anything else.

Ugh sometimes I just wanna smack him upside the head.

Eddie keeps the radio down low and chats with Emma the whole way there.

"Look Em, there's the playground! See that big doggy? And there's that bitch Mrs. Phillips that failed me last-"

"Eddie." You scold. "Language."

He chuckles. "Well she'll be in school eventually and she should know which teachers are gonna have it out for her."

"Fair point. They'll see Munson listed as a last name and have a heart attack."

No one knew who Emma's father really was. Eddie's dad had been in jail for years before Wendy got pregnant, but she'd still listed him on the birth certificate. Eddie didn't care either way. Emma was one hundred percent his baby sister.

You arrive at the doctor's office and sit in the waiting room, Eddie bouncing Emma on his knee while you hum to her and run your hand through her curls.

The nurse calls her name and you three follow her to a room. Emma starts fussing as soon as she's lifted from Eddie's arms. Eddie clenches his fists at his sides. You know he wants to snatch her back and comfort her.

The nurse gets a set of vitals.

"No temp. Her blood pressure and heart rate are a little high, but that's to be expected with her being upset."

She hands Emma back to Eddie. "I've got to prick her finger to get a blood sample. I need you to hold her still, okay?"

Eddie nods, wrapping his arms around Emma and hugging her close. The nurse takes her hand and sticks her finger.

Emma's face crumples. She looks up at Eddie and lets out a loud wail, tears spilling on her cheeks.

Eddie looks horrified. "How hard did you stick her!?"

"It's just a little prick. She's fine." The nurse reassures him, wrapping a band-aid around her finger.

Eddie scowls at her and hugs Emma tighter. "Shh, Em, it's okay. She's all done torturing you. Poor baby girl."

"Eddie, she's just doing her job." You scold him.

He ignores you and keeps a murderous glare trained on her until she leaves the room.

The doctor comes in a few minutes later. You and Eddie watch nervously as he examines her, letting her chew on his stethoscope and tug on his tie. He's very gentle with her, cooing and chuckling the entire time. You like him instantly.

"Is she walking yet?"

Eddie shakes his head. "No, she only started crawling two months ago."

"Any words?"

"Not really, mostly gibberish. But she's trying, aren't you Em?"

"Well, she's teething for sure, which explains some of the agitation. I'm more worried about delays in her development."

"Delays?"

"It's to be expected with a child of Emma's background." He shifts, looking uncomfortable. "I mean being born premature with, with-"

"Drugs in her system." Eddie mumbles. "You can say it."

"Yes, yes. My apologies. I think the best thing we can do for Emma right now is to get her on a specific schedule, with specific times for napping, sleeping, etc. There's foods that can be avoided, as they hype up children."

"We can do that, no problem."

"I'd also like to refer Emma to a specialist. Someone that can monitor her cognitive functions better, perhaps suggest some forms of therapy to get her where she needs to be."

Eddie nods. "Whatever she needs."

The doctor hesitates. "I'm not going to lie, these appointments can be expensive. Without insurance-"

Eddie cuts him off. "It's fine. We'll do whatever it takes." 

The doctor nods, leading you to the front desk. You're handled a folder with all the information. Eddie is silent, but the worry on his face speaks volumes. You stay silent too as he loads Emma into the van and then shuts the door, lighting up a cigarette.

He only smoked when he was extremely stressed. You watch as the worry is replaced by rage. He steps to the back of the van where Emma can't see him and kicks the tire.

"Fucking Wendy! Even now she screws us over. Even now she fucks everything up!"

"We'll figure it out, Eddie. I have some savings. The cheer squad, we'll do a bake sale. I know we can-"

"I'm not accepting your goddamn charity! She's my sister! Mine. My responsibility. I will figure this out. I will take care of her!"

"It's not about you and your fucking pride, Eddie! It's about Emma! I love her too and I'm going to help her any way I can!"

Eddie tosses the cigarette on the ground. "Get in. The sooner we get home the sooner I can get away from you."

You want to scream at him. You want to tell him off and walk home. But you know that he's scared for Emma and just lashing out.

You get into the passenger's seat and sit quietly.

Eddie sighs. He knows deep down that you're just trying to help. He knows that you love Emma. But you claimed to love him too, and then freshman year started and you basically ditched him to fit in with his tormentors. He wasn't going to give you the chance to hurt Emma like you'd hurt him. To leave her behind. The end of senior year was rapidly approaching and you'd be off to college, forgetting the both of them. He'd be all alone. And he'd be damned if Emma was gonna have to miss you the way he would.

You arrive back at the trailer and help Eddie get Emma inside.

"Do you want me to run to the store and get the stuff on the doctor's list?" You offer.

"I'll go get it in a bit. I'm gonna try to get her to nap first."

You flip through the doctor's instructions. "It says napping late in the evening can keep her up at night."

"She's exhausted."

"I know, but it's almost five now. If she sleeps she'll be up at seven ready to stay up all night."

"Then I'll stay up with her! I'm not forcing her to stay awake when she's sleepy."

"Eddie-"

"You're not the one having to sit up with her so what do you care?"

"I'm trying to help Emma! She shouldn't have to sit up miserable all night because you can't toughen up a bit and do what's best for her!"

Eddie bristles. "Get out. Seriously. Get the fuck out."

Wayne comes down the hallway. "What's all this yelling? Is something wrong?"

Eddie glares at you. "No, sorry. Everything's fine."

"What did the doctor say about Emma?"

"She's fine. Teething."

What? Why isn't he telling him everything?

Eddie grabs your arm and propels you to the door. "Can you watch Em a second? I need to continue this conversation with Y/N privately."

You let him lead you outside.

"Keep your mouth shut about what the doc said. Wayne will kill himself picking up extra shifts to cover the specialist costs."

You nod. Wayne was overworked and exhausted as it was. "I won't say anything on one condition."

He sighs. "I should have known asking you for a favor would come with terms. What do you want?"

"You let me help with the costs. My savings are just sitting there. Use them."

"I'm not gonna do that."

"I'll go to the specialist and pay myself if I have to Eddie. But it doesn't have to be like that. Let me help. Please."

He stares at you as if he's trying to read your mind.

"Let me help." You repeat.

"Fine. But you'll let me pay you back when I can."

"I don't want-"

"That's the only way I'm agreeing to this."

"Fine. You'll pay me back."

"Then we have a deal."

"Do you want me to stay for a bit? I can watch Emma so you can get a nap."

"No, it's fine. I'm not tired."

"Eddie. You're exhausted. I can see it on your face."

"I said-"

"I'm amending my conditions. You also have to accept my help when I offer it. Stop pushing me away."

"I'm just trying to protect Emma."

"From me? Eddie, I love her like she's my own sister. I would never do anything to hurt her. How could you think that?"

Because you hurt me. He wants to say. Because you claimed to love me and then hurt me.

Instead he scowls at you. "Do whatever you want then."

You know he's still being an ass but you take it as a win.

You start back inside, but he stops at the door and turns back to you.

"You were never gonna tell Wayne about the specialist, were you?" He asks. "When I told you not to say anything, you agreed immediately."

"I'm not answering that." You breeze past him and into the trailer.

Eddie stands outside a bit longer, wondering exactly what he's gotten himself into with you.

[quietwingsinthesky]

Rules: List the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern!

Tagged by @roxannepolice :3!!! and for my own sake, I've gone with my actual fics and not my daily drabbles.

"Rose is always surprised by how barren Jack’s room seems compared to her own." - New Discoveries, in Good Hands (my transmasc!rose/jack fic)

"Amy watches her boys, a grin on her face." - up a creek without a paddle (and the water rushes so loudly) (the uhm. amy/eleven/rory watersports fic. that happened.)

"He should be better at knowing when Jack is scheming." - tell a story, make it a good one, make it come true (human!doctors au where they are siblings, inspired by some of lazer-screwdriver's tags on those posts, i swear i'm gonna write the chapter about ten soon.)

"'Don’t look at me like that,' Even says, softly." - i was not taught forgiveness (OC fic, starring Even and Twelve reconciling. poorly.)

"Even stares at Clara until she gets uncomfortable and looks away first." - love is a promise, trust is a feeling (Also OC fic, with Even & Clara this time.)

"I should be dead." - Stalemate (....look. writing about my silly little OC is fun, okay. this time starring even & simm!master)

"Toshiko knows something is up from the moment Jack begins to grin from across the table." - put a ring on it (fake proposal with real kissing jack/tosh fic)

"'No. I'm not doing this. It's humiliating,' Owen protests, slapping Jack's hands away whenever he tries to get a grip on him." - if you follow your friends off a bridge, better hope they pick you up afterwards (jack/owen fic that i am cheating for and including more because otherwise the first sentence would just be 'no')

"'There's no way we're getting inside without getting soaked,'" Gwen says, as if she isn't already dripping. - the forecast calls for (silly gwen & ianto fic about getting caught in the rain)

"Harriet Saxon is not having a good day." - go looking for ghosts (my post-amy & rory leaving mourning fic where eleven makes bad choices and paradoxes are considered. and they were both girls.😳)

double-tagging @lazer-screwdriver to peer pressure them into sharing their oc fics to everyone again, and also @fandom-space-princess, @artoodeeblue, @buddyapologist, and @a-shard-of-quartz-lol (have fun :D)

[moonlitlex]

ok. final thoughts on doctor who season 14 (2024) (because maybe if i say all of this i will finally stop thinking about how much i hate this season)

short version: i'm this season's biggest hater. if this season has a million haters im one of them. if this season has 1000 haters i'm still one of them. if this season has one hater it's me. if this season has no haters it means i have left this world. if the world is against this season i am with the world

long & nuanced version (under the cut)

i'm just really, really, really disappointed. i've always said that good writing can redeem any project, and it kind of feels like they just took it in the exact opposite direction this time. there's so much that went wrong and like 99% of it is down to the writing. i did a rant on my youtube channel (which i'm not gonna link here because i want to keep these accounts separate) and it was like an hour long so i'm not gonna go into detail but i'll just go over my main issues with this season

fifteen lacks depth. i think he's a very generic doctor lacking his own eccentricities. after the first season the doctor usually has quite a distinct personality, but i don't think we got that with fifteen. just compare the kind of characterization fifteen has at this point to like... eleven in his first season. he was a lot more fleshed out. we got to see multiple facets of his personality. it seems like they tried this with fifteen but everything we got to see ended up being really surface level. the susan thing just kind of happens. the rogue thing just kind of happens. he faces racism and he's just kind of incredulous and then the episode ends. it's not explored. the show just moves on to the next thing and we don't get to see how he deals with it.

ruby lacks depth. similarly, i think ruby is a very generic companion. she's a young woman from present day london which isn't in and of itself a bad thing but it's not backed up by much. like, what do we actually know about ruby? she's adopted? she was left on a church doorstep by her biomom? she loves her mom but is still disappointed she can't find her bio parents? these are all plot relevant things. what do we know about her outside of the stuff that is necessary for the plot? job? friends? life before the doctor? there are a few tiny glimpses, but not enough to make her a developed character.

fifteen and ruby's relationship is boring. they never fight. they never disagree. they never argue. they're never angry with each other. they never challenge each other on anything. they're shown to have this amazing best-friend rapport but it's never developed or fleshed out. it just kind of happens. one second they're meeting and the next second they're bffs who never disagree about anything and are always on the same page. it's just not an interesting dynamic.

i found ten and donna to be a very compelling dynamic but that's because they actually have a real friendship and have to deal with conflict and challenges and disagreements. times when the doctor and companion challenge each other are interesting. this is a feature of some really beloved doctor who stories for a reason. dalek wouldn't be so well loved if rose just agreed with nine the entire time. the conflict makes the story more compelling. meanwhile ruby can't even muster an ounce of discontentment with fifteen for the entire season.

season finale payoffs were not compelling and are in my opinion a result of prioritizing shock and surprise and social media buzz at time of release over telling an interesting story.

sutekh is not automatically a compelling villain and the way that arc is written is so... bland. he appears and kills everyone and the next episode they just hit the reset button. fine, doctor who has done this before, but there was interesting character writing back then to distract you from the baffling story decisions.

the season 3 finale had flying jesus ten but it also had interesting character dynamics. this one had sutekh defeated in the most confusing way possible (if he got his power from the time vortex why is it killing him now....) but there's barely anything going on in the character department. it's rtd so i expected hamfisted deus ex machinas, but i didn't expect the lack of care on the character front.

the susan thing was just... it came out of nowhere, didn't really make much sense, and then it immediately disappeared. the doctor thinking it's his susan was just confusing for me and it didn't land. like why would susan.... do that? why would she be basically following him around the universe by weaving herself into the scenery everywhere he landed? this is never even addressed. they just get the tardis anagram and he immediately jumps to it being his susan and you're not really sure why he's so convinced and it's never really explained.

ruby's mom being a normal woman literally just doesn't make any sense. it's never explained. "we thought she was really important" doesn't just do all the inexplicable things. why and how is ruby able to make it snow if her mom is just a normal person? why does the song in his soul scare maestro so much? why is sutekh of all people unable to figure out who her mother is? the reveal is played as a criticism of the audience for building up ruby's mom to be this huge mystery, but it wasn't the audience doing this - it was the writers. these are the clues they laid out and they're never explained. "doctor who is more fantastical now" also doesn't make any sense. fantasy has rules too. you can't just do whatever you want. the world still has to be internally consistent. the reveal by itself is a nice moment but it's just disappointing that they decided to laugh at the audience for taking their show seriously.

i've seen a lot of people compare ruby's mom thing with clara's impossible girl thing. i would like to point out 2 differences that make clara's impossible girl arc superior. first - clara's impossible girl arc never tries to weasel its way out of the mystery. the point is that who clara is is more important than the mystery surrounding her. ruby's mom mystery tries to erase the mystery entirely. second - clara's impossible girl arc is resolved the way it is because of clara. clara is a person who takes an action because of who she is. it shows courage and selflessness and care for her friend. ruby's mom mystery is solved by ruby and the doctor finding a database where they can match ruby's dna to her mom's. it doesn't say anything about her character. her character is irrelevant to the resolution.

i've also seen it compared to the hybrid thing from season 9, but with the hybrid there was never anything unexplainable happening in the first place so "it was just the characters obsessing about it all along" makes sense because it literally is just the characters bringing up the hybrid all the time.

the individual episodes are not... good. here are my opinions on each of them

church on ruby road - ok introduction, weird pacing, the goblin song was just tonally off compared to the rest of the episode

space babies - genuinely makes the doctor seem like a sadistic asshole at times like he keeps laughing at the literal babies for being scared of the monster and this is played for laughs (???), boogeyman reveal thing literally came out of nowhere there was no setup and it made no sense and was never really explained, a lot of tonal whiplash in this episode, poor exposition choices at the start

devils chord - maestro was a fun performance but nothing else about this episode is interesting, there are no beatles, the 4th wall breaks are tonally inconsistent with the rest of the season

boom - ruby gets sidelined but making ncuti act without being able to move any of his body slaps as a concept and while it was too on the nose, the thematic messaging aspects of this episode are coherent and don't talk down to the audience, some side characters get to be relevant to the story and moderately developed (mundy, splice, the dad), splice's actor was far too old to be delivering those lines and it didn't land well, the dad ai defeating the ambulance ai was a bit too much but was in line with the power of love and faith theme so i'm conflicted on how i feel about that

73 yards - did nothing right. there are a few minutes of good welsh folk horror at the start before that aspect of the story is undermined by those people in the pub. ruby gets no character development. the horror atmosphere is abandoned at the start and the horror concept is abandoned entirely partway through the story in favour of the political stuff with roger ap gwilliam, which is kind of resolved in a really anticlimactic scene which doesn't matter anyway because everything just gets undone at the end of the episode. there are no answers.

it's not a good horror story because 90% of it isn't horror. it's not a good political drama because nothing happens. it's not a good character study because we don't get to know anything about ruby's character. i genuinely think rtd has forgotten the kind of stuff he's written because he called this the best thing he's ever written and it's literally not even in the top 10 doctor who episodes he's ever written. like midnight is right there. the waters of mars is RIGHT THERE. this episode is all setup and no payoff.

also - i might just be autistic, but the "can i pay with my phone" joke doesn't land because not everyone can actually accept digital payments yet! it's like... an extremely normal question to ask. i literally ask all the time unless i see an "apple pay accepted" sign because sometimes the answer is "no, we only take cash or card". i know it was supposed to be something about how ruby thinks she's in the past or welsh people getting wrongly stereotyped for being backward but maybe rtd should've come up with a line that would actually be offensive and not just a completely normal thing to ask in 2024.

dot and bubble - this is probably my most controversial take. i hate this episode. i think it's a poorly written bad episode. and furthermore i think only people who are disconnected from all discussion around racism think it's got genuinely good commentary. for MOST of this episode, it's a "kids be on they damn phones" thing. like, genuinely. lindy can't even WALK without her phone. there's nothing in the episode to tip us as the audience off to the idea that the dots hate them because they're racist. everything in the episode is pointing at "the dots hate them because they're stupid as fuck because they're always on that damn phone".

lindy at first seems like a flawed but sympathetic character, and this could genuinely have worked with the racism commentary. if it's about them being racist cause they're sooooooo fucking stupid, maybe don't have lindy be an irredeemable extremely racist character who kills someone. maybe she's repeating all the rhetoric she's heard her entire life without ever thinking about it. maybe trying to convince her racist friends to give the doctor a chance gets her socially isolated. maybe it's about echo chambers and social bubbles. maybe lindy as an individual has no malicious intent either way but she still behaves in a racist way and still ends up siding with the racists because they're her friends and she wants to fit in and be part of the in group and trying to not be racist because the doctor seemed kinda nice got her socially ostracized so she perpetuates racism regardless. but none of this is what happens. this is a reading you can get out of it if you're really dedicated to reading into a story written by a guy who doesn't give a shit about racism.

lindy and all her friends are stupid and bad and racist and the doctor is still desperate to save them for some fucking reason and he doesn't even get to SAY anything to them, he just laughs incredulously and that's his entire reaction. the commentary in this episode is baby's first lesson on racism. it's a message of "racism is bad and stupid" tacked onto an episode with a message of "being on your phone is bad and stupid".

it's shallow. it has nothing to say. it's very clearly a story about racism written by a white man who has never had to even think about racism. the entire writer's room for this season was white as well. rtd didn't even think he should maybe consider giving the racism episode to a black writer. he just wrote a full episode where the message is "racism is bad you guys" and patted himself on the back for his social commentary. i think it's embarrassing that people praise this episode for opening their eyes to racism in the real world and helping them understand it better. literally all that tells me is they've been closing their eyes and covering their ears every time a person of colour talks about racism. like black fans have literally been talking about racism in doctor who for decades and clearly none of you listened to any of them because you're here watching an episode with an "omg racism is bad guys" message going "wow, i never though about it like that!" that's because you're an asshole.

"wow i didn't even notice that everyone in this episode is white!" that's because that's not out of the ordinary for doctor who. or for television in general. this isn't revolutionary commentary. it's an indictment of the season 14 writer's room that they thought they could write this episode without even taking a look around their own writer's room and thinking "huh, everyone here is white too. maybe we should try to change that." this show has been predominantly white for MOST of its history. i'm a huge critic of the chibnall era but at least that guy hired poc to write for the show. at least the bad racism commentary in rosa (which was, to remind you, "the future racist is wrong. racism is bad. also the entire civil rights movement was basically a happy accident") was written by a black woman. at least the weird british empire glorifying shit in the partition episode was written by an indian man (to be clear, stuff written by poc also deserves to be criticized. my point is just that at least chibnall had the basic common sense to hire people who knew more than him to write these stories). rtd didn't even consider this. not even a cowriter.

it's just embarrassing to watch white fans falling over themselves analyzing how this episode is soooo deep when it's simply not. racism isn't silly goofy stupid. it's dangerous. it gets people killed every day. it's even more ridiculous that the racism is addressed in the future episode but not anywhere else! fifteen goes to 60s england and... nothing. he goes to 1800s england and nothing. sure, future people are racist. whatever. are we seriously sanitizing the real, actual, real life racist past of britain? and then patting ourselves on the back for it? and ricky september being considered not racist? like, reading a book doesn't suddenly make you not racist. racist people aren't necessarily idiots. plenty of highly educated people are racist. making ricky explicitly racist while also a clearly smart character would have added nuance to this episode, but rtd didn't do that. watching a black man beg and plead with rich racist white kids to please let him save their lives is just... ridiculous.

there are countless (and i do mean countless) works by actual people of colour that discuss racism in a far more nuanced way. that go beyond "racism is bad and racist people are stupid". there are specifically black british shows you can watch that actually address racism and have real commentary on it outside of what you would expect a toddler who has just learnt about prejudice to say. shows that aren't about coddling while people. watch shows made by and for people who aren't white. read books written by and for people who aren't white. and don't just watch and read this stuff to "educate yourself" on other people's experiences. watch it because it's art. because it's entertaining or funny or interesting or dramatic, just like stories that are about white people are allowed to be. and stop praising an episode with a racism is bad message for being good racism commentary. seriously. we already know racism is bad. this is embarrassing for you.

dot and bubble was a "kids be on they damn phones episode" with "racism is so bad guys" tacked onto it and white fans fell over themselves explaining how it opened their eyes and it was so deep and meaningful and powerful and it was none of those things. it was bland and shallow and honestly really boring they spend WAY too long hitting us over the head with how the kids are so stupid cause they're on their damn phones. you should be embarrassed. if this episode was the first thing that made me realize racism exists and is bad you couldn't waterboard that out of me. grow up.

rogue - rogue was an underdeveloped jack harkness ripoff, there's no development of the relationship between him and the doctor, ruby got nothing to do, the proposal came out of nowhere, the chuldurs were an interesting concept but they literally didn't even do any of the larping they were there for apart from the one who was lady emily. murder is not a prominent part of bridgerton or similar regency era romances that they were supposedly there to cosplay

legend of ruby sunday - this episode is literally 99% exposition. like i'm not joking. there's exposition and exposition and exposition for the whole episode and at the end sutekh appears and kills everyone. also "i will kill everyone" is like. not a compelling motivation. doctor who is full of guys who want to kill everyone. there's nothing making sutekh particularly scary or compelling apart from the fact that he thanos snapped the whole universe and that's also not particularly scary or compelling because he spares the main characters AND because you know they're gonna hit the comic book reset button next episode. sutekh being attached to the tardis since pyramids of mars is unconvincing personally (it would've made more sense if it was since wild blue yonder)

empire of death - ??????? ruby's mom is just a normal woman. they leash sutekh like a dog and drag him through the time vortex which kills him for some reason and also hits reset on his kill switch for the whole universe and that just fixes everything. ruby calls her biomom her real mom instead of carla which just really rubbed me the wrong way. she exits the tardis to stay with her family and it's... fine. you never see why ruby and the doctor were attached to each other so them saying goodbye doesn't hit home. nothing happens and then suddenly everything happens. the fact that the reveal is unconvincing makes the whole thing worse.

conclusion: i think rtd ran out of ideas for doctor who. i think he shouldn't have come back. i think the 60th specials were season 4 fanfiction. i think they should've given the showrunner position to a different writer entirely. i think 8 episodes is far too short for a doctor who season (flux being an exception because it was one ongoing story). i think the bigger budget and better production value can't save a show with poor writing. i think gatwa and gibson are acting their hearts out and i wish they had better material because i really like both of them in these roles. i'm also kind of sick of murray gold's music at this point. he won't let emotional moments just sit and it's really annoying how every time anything happens there's a swell of music. i think rtd should give up on racism commentary and just hire someone else who can do it justice if he really wants it to be in his show. i think rtd should shift focus back to the characters and their interpersonal relationships because that's what he's good at and his plot resolutions have always been underwhelming deus ex machinas. i think they should give this show more episodes. i think they should change the broadcasting times to be a better slot in the uk and the episode should go up on streaming at the same time or after it airs. this season has little glimpses of potential (some of boom, first few minutes of 73 yards, episode concepts in general are quite interesting, more fantasy in doctor who is a fun concept) but squanders all of it with flat characters. i started dreading watching the next episode after a while because i kept hoping it would be good and then i would hate it.

but i still care too much about doctor who to not watch the show so i guess i'll be here this time next year picking season 15 apart. woo.

[the-force-awakens]

Nym, the way I squeed when I saw your tags!

First of all, I am sorry for stumbling into your inbox like this. I hope that you had a great and lovely start into the new year 💖

But, but... It's like every doctor gets their own little dose of "Poe-ness", isn't it?

Chrissie!! You're allowed to stumble into my inbox anyway you like <33 and thank you!! Right back at you, lovely!

And boy...isn't that the truth? It's like @dameronalone always says: have you ever met a mortal man that is so, so Doctor coded? Truly it's astounding just how many times since 2020 that I've gone and rewatched episodes of Doctor Who and sat there going "Poe's done that...Poe's also done that....hey Poe did that......Poe hasn't done that but he would -"

It happens the most often when I'm watching eleven I won't lie (hell, another of my qpps watched a few episodes of eleven with me and every episode they'd turn to me at one point and go "poe" over something the Doctor had done and yeah. Yeah that's our flyboy alright), but I can definitely pinpoint more similarities between the others. Like I noticed last year there seems to be a very fun overlap between damerey shippers and doctor/rose shippers, which - yeah of course we WOULD be drawn to another ship where one half is a traumatized soldier in a beaten up leather jacket and the other is a fiery ball of compassionate light that's been waiting for her life to begin wouldn't we 🤔

but so far 15's energy just reminds me of Poe's at times, if Poe wasn't quite so bogged down with his responsibilities and duty to the Resistance (maybe if Poe got to do what he really wanted, and just travel the universe with someone he loves), and I can't wait to see more of him - both to see if my hunch there is correct and also because 15 is amazing and I need to know more about him immediately I want to travel with him so badly.

[iceinherheart-kissonherlips]

Is there anything you can say about Clara's character that would make me want to watch her episodes? I've never seen her with 12 and I'm always worried that Steven tried to overshadow River with Clara's character.

babygirl (gender neutral), I am just an old person on the internet, I don't know if I can convince you to do anything. but oh well.

first of all: worry not. Clara and River are different characters. that's one. two: Moffat would never try to overshadow River. River - as a character - is he's brainchild and he also adores the ground Alex Kingston walks on (as everyone should). so he wouldn't try to do anything like that.

as for Clara. oh, she is so fascinating. because she meets Eleven and he is an idiot, he is this soft idiot, he's ridiculous, he rarely shows his darker side. and Clara is also quite soft, but she kind of sets the boundaries. and she loves him, because how could you not. and then he leaves, but he comes back, but he's different. no longer young and ridiculous, no longer laughs with ease. he's rougher around the edges, more serious and not that kind. and that doesn't really sit right with Clara in the beginning, because that's not the man she knows! he was different. but then, oh, then she decides that she can help him to find that joy again. to be kind again.

and Twelve does become kinder and softer, and he becomes a freaking ridiculous rockstar space grandfather. but in the process Clara becomes harsher. tougher. the boundaries get blurried and then they disappear. Twelve changes, but so does Clara - and it isn't necessary a change for good.

Clara's story isn't just about how the Doctor makes our life wonderful and better: it's a story about how dangerous the Doctor may be to someone and how toxic and intense his relationship with companions may get. Clara and Twelve were absolutely messy and terrible for each other: it shows in the lengths they're ready to go for each other. it's like watching a freaking trainwreck. but man, it's a fascinating thing to watch.

idk man, I'd watch it If I were you. it's not lovely and cute and it doesn't have unicorns farting with rainbows, but I think it's pretty damn good and interesting.

[metaphoricalcolours]

i've always been a huge fan of new who's holy trinity - nine, ten and eleven. i tried to get into twelve as well but he just didn't feel like the doctor to me and i couldn't stand clara so i just stopped watching doctor who, which has been my favourite show for nearly a decade. i decided to borrow season 8 and 9 on dvd last month to give them a decisive shot, resuming after 4 years. against all odds and what i, myself, would've sincerely imagined, they finally grew on me. both of them. in just 3 weeks, mind you! so i'm writing this after finishing face the raven, which i knew would be the episode where clara dies, thanks to a lovely spoiler on this very app. i knew i wasn't ready to see it happen though, and oh god - i was definitely not prepared for how it happened.

losing a main companion on doctor who is always upsetting, to put it mildly, but it was heartbreaking for several reasons this time. first of all, tell me this isn't twelve & clara's very own doomsday? this is literally ten & rose standing on darlig ulv stranden, knowing they're about to say goodbye but the expected 3 little words are yet again robbed from us. he was ready to say them this time!!

nothing new here, but this show never disappoints when it comes to speeches so we have clara basically telling the doctor not to let this turn him into another ashildr while he's - pardon the word - dying to save her. he always tries to save everybody, but this loss is obviously a much bigger deal to him.

now, this is where it gets specific. remember that part in the girl who died where twelve shows more emotion than he'd done in most of season 8 and is desperate to the point where he goes "i am so sick of losing people"? he was telling clara after failing to save... yes, none other than the person who'd turn out to be responsible for clara's death. hero-turned-villain, ashildr/me. a villain he'd encounter for the first time in the woman who lived, although they did agree on some sort of truce at the end of the episode, by which point i'm sure he'd regretted saving her at least once, considering how cruel she'd become, but that feeling must've gone past the point of no return when she not only lured him, clara and rigby in that hidden street out of the blue but also took the woman he loves. no, she might not have known that clara would take on the weight that was on rigby's shoulders but she had no reason to do everything that led up to that event. there was nothing the doctor could do to save clara this time, and that wouldn't have happened if he hadn't given ashildr the chip that made her immortal and turned her into such a cruel person.

another thing: he told clara not to run because he wanted to be with her till the very last second, which is pretty significant since running is what he always tells people to do. she went outside and he followed her. all he could do was watch her die and stand there with all the anger in the universe inside of him. he would've raised hell for her but she didn't want to see him like that in their last moments spent together.

this hug obviously means even more than usual, and we know what the doctor told clara after demonstrating an aversion for hugging in season 8: a hug is just a way to hide your face.

oh, sweet heartbreaking hints peppered throughout season 9.