#i am sending telepathic love to you thank you and i hope you also know that you arent alone

[crystalis]

i hope ur feeling better. ik its hard that we live in such a shitty society and ik exactly how u feel. ive also never landed a job, cant drive, and barely have any kind of life experience at the old age of 25. please dont value urself based on what you can or cant provide for the shitty capitalist system, u are so much more than that. i may not know u personally but weve been mutuals forever and uve always remained such a sweet, empathetic person with an interesting character and i just have so many hopes for u. it doesnt matter if ur behind in life compared to your peers, its unrealistic to expect everyone to fit into a restrictive mold. i could go on and on about this but my point is: dont allow someone to dehumanize or lessen ur worth because of conditions out of ur control. u dont deserve that, no one deserves that. if u need resources on how to help urself id be more than happy to help, but i also dont want to intrude too much. and i hope to god tumblr doesnt cut off this ask i have no idea how many characters are allowed

thank you that means a lot.. its validating being reminded im not alone, i think part of what makes it so painful is the feeling that i am failing uniquely. or that im the only person in this sort of situation

it feels dificult to get out of the trap of self-sabotage. it's like any time i make some sort of progress, like leaving the house more (last year i was going on walks a lot, and me and my mom were going to the park every once in a while), i eventuallt take 2 steps back and i ended up pushing people in my life away and making myself more isolated

i know that things would be easier if i had close friends my age that could help guide me, but it's like i unconsciously respond to that by making myself friendless/guide-less.. i dont know how to articulate this very well.. it feels increasingly more difficult to climb out of a hole the deeper that you are, and it's like there's part of you that just wants to dig deeper until theres no escape

i hvae really intense social anxiety and a fear of humiliation and i get very overwhelmed by it when im alone in public spaces or when i think about getting a job. i know its very exacerbated by the fear of the unknown since ive never done interviews or had a job before, i never even had a 'first time' experience and it makes it so much worse for someone with intense social anxiety

and theres also that feeling that i am intruding in someone elses spaces / lives or their friend-groups.. i always think—what if my coworkers dont like me or think im awkward? or what if i make things more difficult for them because i mess things up, or what if im a bad worker and people talk about me. and it gets harder the older i get.. how can i explain how clueless/backwards i am at 26 years old, it's not like im a 16 year old that people expect to not know what theyre doing, you know

[nighthawkers]

s+t in paris jan ‘24

returned to paris with the love of my life at the start of january this year. it seems we’ve made a habit of running away to this city every january. i hope this habit turns into lifelong tradition.

we celebrated 10 years of friendship (our tin-aversary) just a few months earlier in sept ‘23.

recently i’ve found myself reconnecting and reconciling with parts of myself i seemed to have unknowingly buried years ago. in february, i reached for a diary that i used to keep when i was 14. tens of scribble-on leather-bound pages that i had hidden away out of fear of confronting the traumas of my past lives. however, this year, reaching out for it felt so simple. i led a revolution from my bed when i began to carefully flick through the pages by my fingertips. i may have been peering in hesitantly at first, but soon enough i was sucked in, charmed by her teenage wit. she was so… smart, funny, charming and so fucking headstrong. i see her forming parts of her identity with each page i turn. she had just watched mermaids (1990) and carved ‘winona forever’ on the page in black ink out of sincere admiration for charlotte flax’s catholicly coquettish style. she deliberates the idea of nirvana and wonders how those who believe in an afterlife and have strong faith in God can still be scared of death. she writes her desperation to have more band tees and is confident that, if called upon, she will always be able to name 5 songs from the artists she pragmatically chooses to wear proudly on her chest. she jots her 10-step plan for running away, a how-to guide in order to get out swiftly, efficiently and quietly in the night to start a new life somewhere far, far away. it should be more painful, but the feeling is… something i’m still unable to describe. perhaps bittersweet. seeing these words from my past-self reminded me of her pain. god knows it was so hard being 14. however, something strange happens to me. when the nostalgia would typically be all-consuming for me, i am instead engulfed in a complete awareness of my physical being. i feel the skin of my knees brush my starchy duvet as i sit cross legged on my bed. the pads of my fingers feel the grit of the moleskin’s paper. my breaths go deep into my chest and exhale smooth and steady from parted lips. i’m actually alive. i pay silent homage to the girl this diary used to belong to and hope my telepathic message of ‘thank you for keeping me her long enough to see this’ somehow reaches her through retrocausality. as i send my tribute, a brighter light begins to blind me from the page. i see the violent etchings of a T, an A and a Z. in capital letters, as always. underneath reads: dear safa, i really really really really really really like you”. i realise with every account of me, there is also an account of you. albeit, most mentions are referential only by your now-defunct teenage pseudonym, but where i saw your name i also saw mine. both aliases created so that we could escape the obligations of endurance that came with being born as ourselves. oh, how those names still felt like us. i read an account that i wrote exactly 10 years ago to the day, 15th february 2014, and, my darling girl, all i can think about is how far we have come. 10 years of alienation, reinvention and self-discovery, 120 months of the same bob mortimer youtube compilation, cd mixtapes and soul-bearing love letters to one another (i’ve kept them all), 3653 days of saving pocket change to spent at hmv to now spending freely as we lounge in hotel rooms eating tiramisu and doing face masks in paris. a decade of having you by my side. in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, til death do us part. a.h.k and jasey rae.

we will always run down the street with stars in our eyes, hand in hand, forever.

[woodsfae]

Babylon 5 s02e09 The Coming of Shadows s02 Table of Contents • previous episode

I am very interested in finding out what G'Kar decides to do about the Centauri Emperor visiting.

As per usual, I am blehh about their sexually dimorphic haircuts, and could only sigh when it was revealed it's mandatory haircuts they all definitely make out of their own volition.

Will Londo backstab the Emperor that just gave him the gift of divorcing 2/3rds of his wives? I can't decide.

Haven't seen Kosh in awhile...maybe Kosh will pop up now that the Emperor has expressed an interest in the Vorlon.

If G'Kar actually stabs the Centauri Emperor I will be very surprised...

Poor Emperor, living the most privileged and powerful life on Centauri Prime. :( I do see how that life could give one existential depression, though.

Proselytizing in your will is a choice!

Strange, logical, and unsettling use of telepaths by Centauri. It makes them feel more alien.

G'Kar's armor definitely got prettier in this episode. Murderous calm suits him.

He likes to look extra good and as blinged out as possible before assassinating heads of state.

Sometimes I think Delenn might be a telepath. Like when she eyeballs G'Kar's murderous intentions from fifty yards.

Oh, no RIP to the Emperor yet. Secret message from the Emperor! Doctor Franklin has a quest given by royal mandate.

So Londo has gotten over his earlier hesitations pretty quickly. Using Morden to wipe out even more Narns, knowingly this time, in order to instigate war, is several steps too far.

Poor G'Kar. It woulda felt so good to stab the Centauri Emperor and I do want that kind of joy for him.

Since we didn't hear the Emperor's message from him, it'd be pretty funny if it was more like "He wanted to stand in neutral territory by a Narn and say "haha, suck it"," and Dr Franklin was like "he is dying anyway, I may as well help facilitate peace between two interstellar superpowers," and made up this heartfelt speech.

I think he did send the apology, but it would be pretty funny.

Londo is racking up the war crimes like crazy. He's weakening one of the best and most fervent allies they have in the upcoming conflict against the Shadow. Which they have no evidence of also thanks to Londo actively collaborating with Morden that Shady Asshole.

G'Kar: "I've heard something and it makes me think there is still hope for us after all. I'd believed your people capable of only murder and pain...but apparently there's still a spark of decency in your genetic code. It's not much of a foundation, I'll grant you that, but - it's a start! I never thought I would be saying this, Mollari, but ... to the health of your emperor. And perhaps, to your health as well.

Yeah, make him feel guilty as fuck with your genuine hand of alliance, G'Kar!

Man, the colony really is wiped out. A lot of political turnover and turmoil going on across the main powers!

Sinclair!!! He looks good. The Minbari Ambassador position must be nicely restful.

My friend. I miss him.

He has rangers!! I love this arc for him. Secret association against the Shadows.

250,000 people wiped out or taken prisoner with no hope of seeing them alive again. I'd be fucken ticked at Londo, too.

Sinclair: "Stay close to the Vorlon and watch out for shadows. They move, when you're not looking at them."

G'Kar :( I support the Narnuan right to live their lives without being wiped out by the Shadows or the Centauri.

Emperor: "How will this end?" Vorlon: "In fire."

ominous.

"Sheridan's rule number 29: always make your opponent think you know more than you really know."

Sheridan is a dork. Even if that's sound advice. Probably, anyway. Idk, I don't have enemies...

The info sharing is great.

Tell them off, dying old Emperor.

Or don't, and just die.

Londo: "[The Emperor] said, "Continue. Take my people back to the stars.""

I don't believe that for one second. And to lie so brazenly in front of telepaths. Londo.

"Mollari, what did he say, really?" "He said...that we are both damned."

That sounds more like it.

"Well, it's a small enough price to pay for immortality."

This other Centauri politician is less conflicted about it, but Londo just did a shitload of war crimes. Feeling a little weird about it is only proof of possessing a sad, dying, twinging conscience.

The Centauri are really hardcore slavers, huh. Just insistently keeping all the Narn civilians for forced labor.

Legal observers from Earthforce is a lot more than I was expecting from Earthforce.

But it did make the Centauri back down on keeping the civilians, at least, and I'm glad.

G'Kar is phenomenally moving in his unfathomable grief/rage state of mind.

It is completely unsurprising that Londo's death vision of him strangling G'Kar is actually the other way around with G'Kar stranging him. It does make it more infuriating that he's so into Centauri imperialism. What is it, "get them before G'Kar gets me?"

Awwww Delenn! And Sinclair! Hello old friend to you too, Commander Sinclair.

next episode

[caelanglang]

this is a positive ask i promise do not be afraid. being taken out back and shot point-blank in the head would hurt less than reading your most recent dazai comic (positive connotation). your style and coloring are so unbelievably beautiful and soft and vivid and its so bright and light and it conveys the message of hope in the most amazing way possible. also the dialogue (monologue?) got me clawing at the walls and then i read your tags and started chewing on the walls (positive connotation). like imagine going outside (my dash) and a stranger (reblog from a person i dont follow) comes up to you and shows you the most breathtaking sunset or sunrise you have ever seen and the sun also just deadass talks to you and says that maybe the pain is neverending, but the joy is too. and maybe the pain wont be worth it, but the joy will. and the stranger just gives you thumbs up. i dont know how to convey that reading this comic did to my brain but lets say that i did not except dazai osamu from the hit show bungo stray dogs from the hit concept Real Life rewiring it. thank you for the hug i am in fact kissing you on the mouth platonically. sorry for this big ass wall of text in the inbox and not the tags but just know that i would send you this telepathically if i would with sound effects and presentation slides included. have a good day and a picture i think is somewhat funny in this context

omg... this made me smile so much, I don't know what to say... I've been in and out of the dark lately so I barfed out some drabbles and decided to slap it on Dazai, because, honestly, I find it easier to explore my own emotions when I project(?) them on a fictional character oops. I'm so glad my work reached you, dear beautiful and wonderful stranger on the internet <3 I'm holding your hand and chanting with you "let's live on!! we're gonna live on!! we're gonna see a hundred and a thousand more sunsets and sunrises." thank you so much for your kind words, they absolutely made my day when I thought it's gonna be not so bright today TwT it really means a lot to me. That's the thing about the sun, isn't it? We tend to focus so much on the sunrise and sunset, the scorching pain and the comforting warmth that sometimes when the cool darkness of the night comes, we think that it's all over, we won't feel them ever again... we forget that there are thousands of other mini suns-- beautiful stars whose light travel so many lightyears away, waaaay more than our sun, to reach us and cheer us on for the next day. I hope that the joy finds you amidst the pain. I hope your night sky isn't as cloudy as before. I hope that you know how much your words moved me :,)) I love how you wrote that line: "maybe the pain won't be worth it, but the joy will." <3 please don't worry about the wall of text, I love and appreciate them from the bottom of my heart! *hugging, cuddling, kissing you back platonically* (the pic is a 11/10 for me! xD) Thank you for dropping by! I hope you have a lovely day ahead too!!

[bbael]

saw u were feeling sad so here’s a link to an insta dog i follow that makes me giggle,, i luv it sm and for some reason it always reminds me of you too,,, if you haven’t seen it before pls check out its other pics u will not be disappointed T-T also hav some bonus vids (miau) (boys don’t cry) (dog dance) :3 anywho,, i rlly do love you lots and am hoping u feel better soon <3 wish i could hug u instead of just sending silly vids but am telepathically sending u much love and peace🖤🖤🖤

Omfg....are those...bichon frise?? I'm 😭❤❤❤ they are so cute im kinda obsessed sjdjf went thru the acc for a good while and the white one has such a contagious little smile wth!! Also the other vids are making me go insane..... I know its the pms making me sad bc i almost started sobbing with the boys dont cry one qouwhebc and the dogs dancing..to nene malo??? Means so much 2 me ;;-;;

Thank you so much for sending these, i was rly sobbing (as in. laughing) just now with them so I really appreciate it <33 wish I could hug u so bad tho!

Thankyou lots again angel,, hoping you are having an amazing day, sending all my love ur way💌🖤❤

[domjaehyun]

hi again!! i sent the ask about first and sloppy seconds hehe AND SORRYYY i know sloppy seconds is the sequel i expressed myself wrong (also if there's any mistakes i'm sorry for my poor english) 🥹 i meant if you ever thought of writing again for this amazing story i'd be very happy <3 can't get enough of the corruption kink mark concept!! i think i've read every one of your works here and istg i love your writing, since english is not my first language sometimes is difficult for me to concentrate on what i'm reading or fully understand, but yours are my favorite to read since they are so well written !! thanks for being so kind and answering me!! love how you said how mark would be at that scenario and that's EXACTLY what i expected/thought!! there's a lot of church boy/corrupting mark scenarios out there and i always wanted to see HIM being the kinda freaky and the one to corrupt someone (ofc in a very gentle mark lee-ish way if that makes any sense lol) thanks again for answering and i hope you're ok!! sending much love and great wishes all the way from brazil <3

anon i love you i just want you to know that. this put the biggest smile on my face omg :’) no it’s totally okay there was (and is) nothing wrong with your english !! i just wanted to make sure you knew it was the sequel !! your english is wonderful pls dont worry! i will say that i will consider it (writing a third part) but i dont want to get your hopes up bc i went through my list of wips earlier today and had to narrow it down so much … i put off 21 wips and im still at 60!!!!! so i gotta get some of those out of the way but i will def say that i am considering it just for you :D and omg i’m so happy oh wow im so happy you like my fics i cant express how big im smiling right now :’) YEAH I LIKE MORE DOM!MARK AND MORE OF HIM CORRUPTING THE OTHER PERSON BUT IN A WAY THAT FEELS GENUINE !!! ugh we’re so linked telepathically. i’m doing pretty well!! it’s fall here and i’m not a fan of fall so :P but hopefully it’s not too bad this year! SENDING LOVE AND GREAT WISHES RIGHT BACK FROM AMERICA :’) ily omg

[ellmeria]

Hello love! How have you been lately? I'm sending you loads of love, light n positive energy. Take care n be healthy soon especially mentally n emotionally okay. LOVE YA MUAH<33

Hello, angel! I feel like we both have some type of telepathic connection because I was about to ask you the same question earlier. HAHA 🤍

Everything is becoming a little bit better somehow! I took a rest for my mental health and to rethink some decisions regarding my personal life. And I have missed you sooo much! I hope you are also feeling better. Thank you so much for checking up on me! I appreciate it a lot. I am always here for you. You know that, right?

ILY. 💕

[melissa-s23]

Yo,

1. Job markets ass, when using 3rd party job sites like indeed never apply on the app itself! Go to the source, find the actual job posting. Write a cover letter….. yea I know it’s tragic but it’s a good boost. There’s templates on google but I think the general formula is one paragraph expressing interest, body about your qualifications (basically regurgitate your resume, squeeze in key terms specific to the job) final paragraph can be a quick little personal tid bit but usually it’s a send off. Make sure everything is a live file!!! No! Jpegs!!!!!

If you’re still in school, network. I did not do this and I probably should have

2. Girlie pop if you go out to eat at all highly recommend taking as many left overs as possible and repurposing them. For now, bread, butter, cinnamon, sugar. Toast the bread till gold, spread butter, add sugar and cinnamon,A treat. (Separate)Fry an egg on the bread. Add avocado to be basic for fun!pepper flakes for spice. When I was in college I used to eat dried cereal and watch fancy YouTube food video so I could trick my brain into thinking I was eating something real lol.

3. :-( your relationship post made me sad. I’m sorry. You need more media that frames the woman as a person rather than a prop! I know the feeling 😩 being ace puts you in a weird spot sometimes….but remember you are more than the media you and others consume! Also that last part……girlie watch the the soccer cannibalism show get on that RN!!!!! (Yellowjackets go watch Yellowjackets it’s flawed but it’s about flawed women outside the male gaze)

It’ll be ok lol, most things are temporary.

-ghost anon

Hey, thank you for this very kind message! I didn't expect such a quick and constructive response, thank you!

1: I don't know how you figured out I am looking for a job, but as of last week you are absolutely correct! The telepath allegations are not beaten today fjzkrkv

Thanks for the advice! And yeah, I need to send mails and phone calls and it's TIRING but eh, we roll.

2: This is very clever, and that cinamon one I'll definitetly keep in mind. Cooking is definitely an area im lacking in and improvising meal is not something I do easily, so having 3 to 4 'meals' for when you have 0 spoons for cooking is deffo something that will be useful to me. Cinammon toast!

3: yeah, i wrote this post while tired and frustrated. Thankfully the tides are changing at least a bit in that regard and we are seeing more variety. Still, I hope we get more shows where the friendship is front and center and challenged and explored a- I LIKE FRIENDSHIPS!! I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE ARE FRIEND AND FIND MEANING IN THAT TITLE!! Anyway yeah, It's good to remember real life very much isn't like medias. People are good, and we gotta believe in that.

(And ooh, I might check it out then! Thanks for the rec!)

[heeliopheelia]

MAAM ARE YOU A WIZARD. I LEGIT WENT ON A HIKE YESTERDAY AND LO AND BEHOLD I FIND A NIKI FIC WITH HIKING INVOLVED. (My dumbass cut my knee on a rock but moving on)

I feel like this is something Sunoo would do honestly. Like if you've ever seen dark moon the blood altar's Instagram page, you'll see that one cuttoon of Jake carrying him. And we can't resist our Sunoo can we? I love the descriptions in this though. I always fuck up descriptions cause it's always too much or too little. Also Yay you beat writer's block!!! I'm sending you a virtual box of chocolates.

How are you doing sweetheart? I'm doin great.

(PS my life just did a crazy rich Asians turn because I found out my gf basically owns a billion dollar company which I had no idea about. So now she bought me so much jewelry shit. And I have finally found the Jay to my Heeseung. Truly am living that #Heeseung life)

- 💙

OMG NO WAY WE'RE TELEPATHIC NOW 🥴🫶 I hope your knee is better now, did your gf kiss it better? 😚😋 AND PLS THIS YN IS SUNOO CODED FR ✋

I actually rewrote the first paragraph three times before posting so bestie trust me ik what you mean with getting the description right 😭 But I'm so happy you liked it!! Now that I can finally write again, imma post a Heeseung drabble (it's over 1k words but wtv) and I can't wait cause I love it sm!! 😍💖

AND OH MY GOD??? IF SHE WASN'T A KEEPER ALREADY, SHE DEFINITELY IS NOW LMAO 🥴🤪 I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm sure she's super lovely 🥺🩷 And she bought you jewelry?? That's so adorable stop before I cry 😭🫶 My boyfriend is so broke he didn't even have enough money for a parking ticket on our last date but it's ok, I know he's not a gold digger cause I ain't got no gold to dig to begin with 🤣😭👍

I'm doing amazing actually, thanks for asking babe 😊 I actually just came back from a road trip with my friends three days ago, so it was fun!! 😜

[kenobster]

For the ask game! 💫 🎉 💞 🍭 🎙️(Hope that's not too many 😅 I love your writing!)

It's never too many, it fulfills my lust for validation, as does your very kind compliment. XD Thank you for the ask! ❤️

💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

Unfortunately, my favorite kind of comment is one that can't be easily replicated, hahah. XD I get a sense of whether my writing is good (aka effective at what I was attempting to convey) if the comments match what I expected readers to feel. For example — since I expected people to feel horrified and anxious while Obi-Wan's shock collar was activated in chapter 7 of Five Peggats Each, the terror in almost everyone's comments was very emotionally satisfying to me. For an example of the opposite — in chapter 2 of Every Shadow, I was actually really surprised that nobody mentioned how hard Anakin was trying; thus, I started to wonder if I hadn't properly conveyed that (or if him whipping out his lightsaber had contradicted it to a greater extreme than I originally planned).

Note: I loved all the comments on chapter 2; this is just a gauge I use to understand the effectiveness of my writing and how it's being perceived. Any failure to portray Anakin correctly to my vision was mine lmao; no one can take that away from me. XD

In other words, my favorite kind of comment is the one that manages to pierce through the veil and speak to my very soul. My favorite kind of comment is written by someone who has literally read my Brainthoughts™ unfiltered via my writing alone. So, if you're aiming to regularly give me my favorite kind of feedback, good luck with that, hahaha. (Though honestly, I really appreciate knowing how people react, even if unexpected, because then it helps me improve my writing for next time! So even if a reader can't telepathically communicate with me lmao, literary analysis is still very favored.)

Also I can't be asked this question without stating my favorite comment ever lmfao which is: "Anakin, I mean this in the most understanding, empathetic way possible… You’re an ungrateful little bitch." Which, if you've read chapter 2 of Five Peggats Each, this is fucking hilarious. 🤣 I'll never forget it. ❤️

🎉how often do you celebrate completing & posting a work? how often do you give yourself the credit/validation that you seek from others when you post? (if you don't, you should!)

Never lmao.

One time, when I was younger, I read a writing craft book by an author I found pretty humorous. One chapter asked the aspiring writer to consider what they fear. "Some people fear failure. Others fear success... yeah, I still haven't managed to figure that one out." Ten-year-old me found this hilarious. Joke's on me though because now, twenty years later, I am exactly the kind of writer who fears success. :') And I, too, haven't managed to figure it out.

I'm insecure; thus, I crave validation. If I don't get validation when I post something, I will cry ugly crocodile tears. (In other words, please don't think the solution to what I'm about to say is to stop commenting, lol; I'm a ho and I love you.) At the same time, I am anxious! So, if I do get validation, I will cry ugly panic-attack fears. It doesn't matter if the feedback is positive or negative — the more I get, the more the terror paralyzes me. For the life of me, I do not know why this is the case. I love comments, I want comments; I love feedback, I want feedback. For some reason, my body just immediately goes into fight-flight-freeze-fawn, without my brain's consent lol.

Luckily, after the first week or so, the anxiety fades, and I feel very proud while I remember every single kindhearted and wonderful comment I got — without feeling like my heart is gonna skyrocket into the astral plane. By then though, the celebration period has passed lmao. So yeah, I don't really do that part. Though, I guess I do have a ritual of sending my chapter to my mom and hearing her thoughts while we get ice cream after... So that's pretty nice, and I like it. :')

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

Really, I couldn't care less about things like grammar and typos lol.

For me, the most important part of a story is that it's doing something different. In some way, it has to be doing something that hasn't been done before. There are so many ways a story can do this and many times it can be done purely just by being your own unique self. In other words, this is not a contradiction to the "two cakes" logic. Unless you're literally plagiarizing someone else's writing, the way you have made the second cake will always be new and different, purely because it was made by someone who is new and different.

I do think people often shy away from their own uniqueness when they're writing. There are an unfortunate amount of jokes about fic being "too self-indulgent," and many novice writers seem to think that their oddities and quirks make them weird or unpalatable to readers. They are absolutely wrong — those oddities and quirks are actually what make their writing most appealing! Being self-indulgent should be the goal. If you're not weirding the fuck out of people by being bizarrely interested in one specific thing, then what you're actually doing is trying to fit yourself, as a triangle, into a circle mold. If there are no triangle molds in existence, that's fine — carve one out for yourself. :)

In short, be a freak. Be a weirdo. The weirder and freakier you are, the more readers you will draw, and the more passionate your writing will become. Absent of passion, stories are bland and dull and tired. For me, the most important part of a story is the way it lets me empathize with an author who is radically different from the rest.

🍭why did you start writing?

I started writing the second I knew how to hold a pencil — like "yeah they knew I was a creep, since the day I was born" lol. Maybe instead, let's say why I started writing fanfiction. I've written fic since I was a teenager but the last few years, I've grown an intense appreciation for the genre. Ursula K. LeGuin is an author whose style is so wonderful to me, mostly in that she revisits and revisits and revisits and revisits. Truly, her work was very much like fanfiction of her own past work in many ways. The freedom of fanfiction to innovate and improvise the structure of a story (even one's own story) without the approval of a publishing company (or societal expectations) is something that's really hard to find in other spaces. So I like fanfic, and, though I sometimes cycle through fandoms, I'm very much here to stay.

🎙️which one of your fics would you like someone to make a pod-fic of?

The prose in Five Peggats Each is actually something I've worked very hard at — particularly in giving a rhythm to the words. One that is easy to hear and audibly pleasing. I would love if someone was interested in doing that. :') Especially because then I could listen to the total whumpiness of chapter 7 with my own ears. It's my favorite. I've forever peaked lol.

Relevant sidenote: I sent my brother some excerpts of my writing recently (specifically the excerpt in the summary of Every Shadow and the musician/cantina paragraphs near the beginning of chapter 6 of Five Peggats Each), and he was like "dude, this would be an incredible audiobook" which made me super happy. :')

[chairteeth]

Random story revision commentary #3

So. Alice is delightful. Suggestive themes this time ig? No smut or anything. Mention of past cannibalism? Yeah stuff.

It was early in the morning, and the birds fluttering outside the window were giving the princess a headache. She swung her arm harmlessly towards the window in anger. “Ugh, won’t you shut up and die!?” The songbirds outside quieted instantly, dropping from the air. Curious, with her fury long forgotten, Alice got up and went to check the windowsill. “Huh. They actually died. But how?”

Alice that was unnecessary.

resolving to simply throw a hissy fit during her lesson and hope for the best.

Of Course

“Say, who chose this?” Alice asked Maya, the first mate. “We were told Lady Catherine did.” “Of course she did. Well, I suppose it’s not that bad. How have you guys been?”

Oh look it's the Mifuyu expy.

shriveled up in a corner, looking like they were about to pass away from old age.

Me.

Alice giggled. “Thanks for the feedback, no one had figured it out before. Except maybe a certain consort.” “Welcome to the club, neither of us can fool Catherine either.” “I'm glad we agree on Catherine being bullshit incarnate.”

Why are you bonding over this. Also just the sheer hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh of. Delilah. Just. Delilah. It is utterly impossible to come out of this trilogy with neutral feelings about this character, you either love her to bits or loathe her with a burning passion (or you want to rotate her in a microwave and study her under a microscope ig).

“Could we start over?” Alice replied with a smile. “In our relationship? I have no idea why you would want to do that, considering you know exactly what I was after, but I’m afraid not, Ly. That literal backstabbing of yours was a breach of trust I’ll never be able to forget, meaning I cannot possibly trust you again or have you by my side at all anymore.” “What if I became your slave?” That gave her pause. “What?” “Technically, I still have my citizenship,” Delilah started. “Citizens can’t be made into slaves, but the law says nothing about voluntarily surrendering your freedom to somebody else. Anyone subjected to a slave contract has certain magical limitations in what they can do. For example, they can’t lie to or deceive their master, much less attack them.” “I know that,” said Alice, glad that her lessons had covered magical contracts. “I just don’t get why you, having been a slave in the past, would want to do that. Heck, especially being my slave if you know I’ve been manipulating you from the start. I can’t understand your logic.”

DELICE IS ONCE AGAIN ABSOLUTELY SENDING ME. TRULY THE SHIP OF ALL TIME. If you must know, Delilah proceeds to essentially say that her motive is "I'm horny" (this is only about 20% of it though, she has a plan). TO WHICH ALICE RESPONDS WITH:

“… I… I don’t even know how to react to that.”

“Gentle reminder but if we go without sex too long we die. Literally.” -Delilah, telepathically, to her brother

I'm.

“Right, stupid question. Doesn’t calling someone your master trigger your PTSD?” “What is that?”

I WILL DIE LAUGHING. I know she's genuine but the tone I'm hearing this with is-

“Um, Ly? What the fuck?” -Delilah's twin brother, to his sister

YOU AND ME BOTH, DUSTIN. Well no I do know what's up but I didn't when I wrote it so like I feel him yk.

Melisende raised an eyebrow. “Did you dig up the old nobles’ graves? Desecrating a tomb is…”

Catherine :handshake: Alice PEOPLE WHO WOULD ENTIRELY 100% LIE ABOUT THIS TO THEIR SPOUSE(S). But no, Rin did not go do grave robbing with her necromancer wife to research a cure for their other wife's affliction.

Aight I will SAY though. The Crown (all four of them) are just so sweet???? Like I am reading this scene with Catherine and Mel and I am jhdjghsjgfg babies…………….. And I just love the way their polycule?? Everything, there's no verb, it's everything. Each individual relationship and the way they weave together into something so loving and trusting I- jsdhfj.

“Ironic. An unholy symbiont defending its host from a parasite.”

No Rin that is completely normal just ask Veno- is shot.

Rick reeled back. “S-steal? Can’t we do some work around here?” “Mercenary work is plausible, but who knows how long it’d take us to make enough to afford a breeder, we’re pressed for time. Plus, it’s wartime and all mercenaries are lending their services to the crown, it would be extremely suspicious of us to show up now saying we’re mercenaries. On top of that, there would probably only be one or two people we could work for. Also, we’d need a guild permit, all guilds report to Inara, and Inara is not an idiot,” Gretchen lengthily rebuffed.

"Inara is not an idiot" Also Inara: picks up a rock that looks like it's rotting and has some sort of creature inside it

At first, Gretchen had been planning to sneak inside, cloaked and invisible. That was until she saw the person leaning on the wall next to the door, someone she recognized. After a few minutes of internal anguish, the immortal sighed and dropped her cloaking. “Ah. If it isn’t dear old Gretchen. What brings you to the border?” he asked, sharp gray eyes glancing around the area. “I don’t see any soldiers with you, so I’ll assume you’re not here to invade.” “I need a way to the palace.” “Great, just one problem. The old man who owns this place stayed behind, and he packs a punch. His senses are super sharp, too, and he counts the animals every day. I highly doubt you can nab one without him giving you several flesh wounds, at the very least,” the young man explained, uncaring. “You’re not going to ask about my mother?” “… we can do this another time. Please, I really need the favor.” He grunted and rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’ll go take a walk. When I return, you better be gone already. A word of advice, don’t show your face anywhere near a journalist. They don’t take kindly to those who have hurt their own.” “… I’m sorry.”

I wonder how terribly obvious this secret of Gretchen's is considering we learned from Victoria in book 1 that under the blindfold, Gretchen has gray eyes. No other character has gray eyes. Gretchen knew an awful lot about journalists when they came up earlier in this book.

“Did you… have to kill them?” “No witnesses, Rick. Don’t worry, having blood on your clothes is relatively normal here.”

AS IF THAT IS REASSURING AT ALL?

“I’ve had to rely on special textbooks Victoria had lying around her storage room. That place is absolutely ancient, I tell you! It has stuff from ages ago, it’s amazing. I think she might have a hoarding issue, though.”

Shane my guy you can't just call out the supreme leader for being a hoarder, Victoria has like about seven million metric tons of trauma. She needs an ARMY of therapists.

“Because of course the first order she gave was murder,” Thalia started.

This is really fucking funny with the context of what Thalia and Alice's relationship will be in the future. But yes, total Alice moment to just go "will you kill them for me?". And Delilah is, Delilah. So. Yeah. She's not murderous, she just… has a plan. For her goals she will do anything.

Everyone looked exceedingly uncomfortable, even more when they saw Delilah play along; she seemed to be enjoying this treatment. Their unease was very palpable to Alice, and that just made it more gratifying to her.

Hedonistic little psychopath (semi-affectionate, proper use of the word)… Can't wait for this relationship to get Even More ComplicatedTM.

partially for the others’ sake so they wouldn’t have to witness any further displays of whatever that was.

I shouldn't find it funny, I really shouldn't, but solely because I know what Delilah is up to, I find it hilarious.

“Princess or not, if she tries to touch any of us I’m ripping her head clean off her body.” “Audrey, violence will get us all thrown in jail, and violence against a royal would be treason. I’m sure as a Hunter you know how serious that charge can be,” Thalia continued. “Don’t worry, Lady Catherine is acutely aware of the state our souls are in. She wouldn’t let the princess do anything to us without a proper, legitimate reason. Unfortunately, she might be trying to provoke us, so caving is the last thing we should do.” Audrey sighed. “Sometimes I hate life.”

Ain't that a mood. Alice is such a well-loved main character in-universe truly. Sneak villain protagonist moment (how sneaky she was depends on how perceptive the reader has been during books 1 and 2)

“Well, that and we’re lucky my wife is an excellent healer.”

PLEASE THALIA YOU HAVE GIVEN ME A FLASHBACK TO THE TIME WE HAD A SCENE WITH YOUR WIFE BITING A PIECE OF YOUR FLESH OUT OF YOU TO EAT IT (this was consensual, Nora has a funky diet thanks to her Legacy).

Audrey wanted to slap her, and knowing this, the other two held her by one arm each.

To be fair to Audrey: YEAH. Essentially Alice just ordered them to sail around in a potentially dangerous area where no one can eat because THAT will bring the high chances of encountering hostile sea monsters to 100%. She did this because she was bored <3

disappointed to see that no leviathans had attacked the ship.

Alice… Please… We are begging you.

So in this chapter there's like a huge infodump on leviathans and you are Not actually supposed to have any sense of thrill or fear because Alice doesn't but also like. What you're supposed to be thinking is, How the Fuck does Delilah know all of this very specialized information about OCEAN creatures when she lives in a DESERT and has presumably never left the capital city.

“Damn, I guess he got out. Alright, let’s try this. If it fails, I guess I can use the pirates or Delilah as bait. Preferably that monkey over there, Delilah’s too pretty to waste on something like this.”

ALICE.

Alice laughed, looking at her hands. “Oh, things are gonna be soooo fun when I’m back at the palace…” The three captains were quick to call her out on it, however. Particularly Audrey. “Did you just kill a foreign diplomat?” She smiled and clasped her hands behind her back, turning to face the crowd. “Ah, ah, I didn’t kill him. He was attacked and eaten by a ghost leviathan. Right?” The crew murmured in agreement. Glancing around to see their subordinates cowering, the captains had no choice but to accept this.

YET ANOTHER keysmash moment. I feel the "did you just kill a foreign diplomat" in my soul because Delilah is going to do Way Worse to a foreign diplomat in the future.

Also. Audrey: reveals she's a loyalist (aka supports the empress' first wife being in control of the country) by accident in front of her co-captains Thalia and Nora: It's Fine Dw About It

And we end today's session just before I start chapter 8!

[nctaezen]

I knew it, brb am going to throw my phone out to space (it feels like it is happening more? I swear I thought it got fixed but nope and I heard of that glitch you are having! Alas not sure what to fix it as I cannot be sure myself but I hope it got fixed?)

Omg you did!?! How come I never saw your lil Easter egg under glitch mode sets!? I am a bad buddy for not noticing that jdjsdkdk but I do giggle we have glitch mode as a song. Someone from sm is a fan of our lil friendship xD jk! Now we have beatbox and I lean more into glitch mode personally? Both are good songs and fun ones but based on my listens, glitch mode is more. I did see a mutual make a hsm and beatbox gifset which makes me giggle because it very much is high school musical and I love it! A very well put album i agree, im trying to catch up because so many of my favs had comebacks and ontop of that I am a fan of a new group so I am all over with content lol (that and other things which I will get into a bit later)

Oof see life wasn't the easiest for you, I hope things are better now!! I hope thy job is good, shame its a far distance but I hope you can like manage through it, remember slap people with fishes if needed! Also you mentioned a special someone? Pray tell hehehe *pulls up tea and chair* as for life over here its alright! Granted for me life sort of flipped upside down a month ago since I have lost a parent so it hasn't been sunshine and rainbows rn in many ways but I don't want to just throw all of that onto here to also be respectful to your followers! Im trying of course, I have better days than some! I guess one positive news is I have started making gifs myself!! Granted I don't make alot of gifs for nct but I am happy of what I make! Nowhere near your level of awesome gifs, no one can get to your level (alexa play next level) I think thats it? Sorry for not really sharing some fun stuff like usual but I do feel comfy telling ya this update and such. I really do hope you are happy and are much better than me! Sending you a big hug and I hope you can feel my hug! I loves youuu!

Hey my dear glitch friend! I bet you didn't expect my sudden reply, but as I told you, things would get chaotic with my new office location and today I could finally get some rest.

My birthday gave me the right to get 2 days of rest from work today and tomorrow, thank goodness I was waiting for this day to come so fast! Not because it's my anniversary but because I really wanted to rest soooo badly! I worked so much this week and spending extra 3 hours per day stuck in traffic is the worst thing to me.. Thank goodness I convinced my boss to spend the rest of the week WFH.

Whoever came up with Glitch Mode, we surely sent some telepathic vibes of our friendship! You always come on my mind when it randomly comes out on my playlist.

More things happened since our last time we talked and NCT 127 anniversary made me feel a bit mushy, especially with Taeyong's messages, there was a lot to reflect and relate. Also it brought me back to 7th July 2019, when I saw them perform for the first time and we also spent their 3rd anniversary together in London. It was a beautiful happy memory but unfortunately..2019 ended up tragically for me, despite all the beautiful memories I collected through that year.

Because I can feel what you're going through, it was the same year my dad left us as well and it wasn't easy to get over it. Even these days I do think of the images I have stuck in my memory (it was a long fight and it didn't end up peacefully). I know I never openly talked about it here, because I would not stop crying once I would start writing my life story. I've seen lots of friends and people I follow here being more open about these things but I am the type to keep it for myself for a long time. Well I guess now that you talked about your hardships, you gave me the courage to open up myself.

I think the only one who can actually heal us is only ourselves and time. I couldn't find much comfort in other people's words and I know you must feel the same. On another note I wanted to encourage you to focus on things you love the most and hey! someone is debuting into cc's world! I think you'll catch up fast. When I look at my past creations, nothing looked pretty since the beginning, but I tried my best to satisfy myself until I could see positive reactions from other people as well. And it's sure, giffing was a huge source of self-healing for me. And I'm very thankful of thinking of my gifs as being the "next level" haha It already played on my head while I was writing it.

Once again I'm happy you felt comfortable enough to share your story with me. I will be around here for the next days, in the hopes we will get some pretty content soon to share. Sending you a big warm hug and lots of love ♡♡♡ Stay safe, don't skip your meals and keep hydrating yourself

[romirola]

woah- those prompts hurt! may we please get “what are you talking about—   of course i love you?” with Cutie and Geordi? thank you!

Hi, Anon! Yeah, that was a moving list, wasn’t it? I’m so glad you plucked some dialogue from it to give me the chance to try it out. Thanks for your request! This is also my first time writing for Geordi and basically the first time I’m writing for Cutie! (And although I technically wrote for Cutie before, I didn’t exactly advertise that it was Cutie, unless you read the tags.) Hope you enjoy.

Rating: G, WC: ~2K, Prompts, “what are you talking about— of course i love you” and Geordi/Cutie

Come on, come on. I feel so useless sitting here waiting for the computer. It’s not like I can do anything to make it go any faster. I don’t even really know what it’s doing or how it does it. I just wait for it to tell me it’s done and hope nothing goes wrong. What if something does go wrong? How am I supposed to know how to fix it? Is that noise the fan? Is it supposed to be so loud? I, ohh, looks like it’s done.

Geordi blinked as the laptop returned to the lock screen he had set. It was a picture of him and his partner on vacation together. On a whim, they had decided to sign up for a beginning falconry course. Geordi had tried to snap a selfie of himself standing next to his telepath partner with a falcon standing on their shoulder, but that wasn’t exactly what happened. Just as he had snapped the picture, the falcon decided to peck at Cutie’s ear, causing them to scream, causing the falcon to freak out, causing the picture to be Geordi, smiling calmly for the camera and Cutie absolutely terrified and cowering from a falcon mid-flight. It was rare for Geordi to have the opportunity to see Cutie so genuinely surprised. As a telepath, they often were able to anticipate everyone else’s next step as they flitted in and out of people’s minds, just observing, never judging. They amazed Geordi with the sheer control they held over their powers, but sometimes, he did really like to see them as shocked as everyone else when something unexpected happened.

Love that picture. It was so much fun. They’re so funny. I love them.

Geordi made a move to type in his pin code.

Where did that bruise come from on my palm? Looks gross. When’s the last time I cleaned this screen? Can you put Lysol on a touchscreen? I bet it’d ruin the sensitivity.

“Hey, are you done yet?” Cutie asked from the kitchen. Geordi heard them turn off the water, signalling that they had finished washing the dishes from dinner. “You closed two hours ago. Make like your cupcake dough and rest overnight.”

“That’s for bread,” Geordi corrected lightly. “Cupcake batter doesn’t need to rest. And besides, the café is closed, but as the owner, I’m never done,” Geordi laughed. “I just have one email to send to a potential catering client. I’m giving a quote for what I hope is going to be the biggest event I’ve ever booked. Let’s see…” He furrowed his brow as he looked over the types of desserts the client requested and did the math in his head to figure out an estimated price. “Six dozen donuts, five trays of mini-cupcakes, a full sheet cake and little bags of macaroons to give each guest as a favor…” He whistled. “This corporation is going all out for its employee appreciation day. I really want to land this gig. It’d be great publicity for us.”

“If they are smart, they’ll accept your offer. What better way to show appreciation than provide the most delicious desserts I have ever tasted?” Cutie said, drying their hands on their flannel shirt. “But I thought you were going to send that email twenty minutes ago?”

“I’ve been waiting for this dinosaur of a computer to update.” Geordi nodded and patted the empty space on the loveseat next to himself. “Plenty of space for two here, Cutie,” he winked.

“Oh, is that so?” Cutie asked coyly, sliding next to Geordi and letting their chin rest in the crook of Geordi’s shoulder as they kissed his cheek. “And how about it there?” They tapped lightly on his temple, leaving a spark with every touch. “Any room in there for me?”

Geordi gave them a quick kiss on the cheek. “Always,” he hummed, returning back to the email. “Thanks for checking first.”

Thanks for saying ‘yes,’ Cutie spoke into Geordi’s head. They wrapped their arms around his torso. You always work so hard. I want home to be a place you can relax and unwind.

Even without powers, Geordi felt like he was developing the abilities to keep more focused in his own mind when Cutie You make me so relaxed and happy. Geordi turned the laptop so that Cutie had a better angle to see the screen. Will you just reread that and make sure there are no typos? Please?

Of course. Cutie adjusted the screen a little bit more so they could see the draft Geordi typed up. As they read, they whispered the email aloud to themselves. Cutie never seemed to be able to catch their own typos unless they spoke out loud. “Hello, Thank you for contacting…”

As Cutie read through the email, Geordi felt his mind begin to wander again. If I land that job, maybe I should hire another employee. We might need the help. Although, it’d have to be a part-time position. No. I should wait until I can afford a full-time position. I want to make sure anyone who works for me has good benefits, stability. All that jazz. Well then, what should I get? A new oven? No, my oven works well. Hmm. I could give everyone a bonus, since the prep for this event will be torture. But then what would I use my bonus on? I could invest it. Or… we could take another vacation? That’d be fun. I loved our trip earlier this year. I love them so much. I hope they love me, too. Sometimes, I’m not sure. I wonder if—

“What are you talking about—” Cutie gasped as they exited his mind. “Of course I love you!”

Their voice startled Geordi out of his half-daydream, half-stream-of-consciousness-monologue. Geordi was always a little surprised how much louder speech sounded in comparison to thoughts. “I… Um… What?” he sputtered, coming back to reality and realizing what his partner had just heard.

“You just thought, ‘I hope they love me, too. Sometimes, I’m not sure.’ Why?” they asked, hurt practically dripping from their words. “Why don’t you know it? What do I do that makes you doubt it?” Cutie shook their head. “What do I do that makes you doubt me?”

Geordi’s eyes widened when he noticed how Cutie pulled away from him. “What?” he said. “No, no. I didn’t…” He stopped himself from saying that. After all, how could he lie after they had heard him think exactly that? Geordi abandoned that train of thought. “It’s just…” He hesitated, but forced himself to look Cutie in their eyes. “It’s just that, you never say it.”

Cutie tensed. “I say it!” they retorted indignantly. “I say it all the time!”

“No,” Geordi gently corrected. “You don’t. You say, ‘Me, too,’ after I say it or ‘Same here’ or whatever.” He shrugged. “It’s not the same, you know? I know you mean it,” he assured them. “And I know with how you were brought up, ‘I love you’ is a phrase that’s not exactly on the tip of your tongue. And that’s okay.” He let a comforting hand rest on their thigh. “Really. But sometimes, I do wonder, okay? I mean, I don’t think it’s ridiculous of me to want that, you know? I want to hear it. I… I need to hear it.” Geordi swallowed, wholly uncomfortable with articulating what he needed. It was something he struggled with throughout his life, though Cutie was helping him to be more assertive in his life. He figured he owed it to them to be as honest as he wanted them to be with him. Not every second. But…” He shrugged. “Sometimes I wonder if the reason you can’t say it is because you don’t feel it.”

Cutie stayed silent for a moment, thinking back on their time with Geordi. They’d never been so happy before. They had no doubt in their mind that they loved him with every fiber of their being.

So why is it so hard to say?

“Geordi, I’m so sorry,” they whispered, bringing their palm over Geordi’s hand. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. I…”

They felt a frown coming on, so they instinctively covered their face with their other hand. It was so hard for them to show any bit of themselves that wasn’t filtered through some mask or persona that they wanted to show the world. As a telepath, they had been instructed on the importance of keeping in control of their thoughts and emotions since their powers developed. Between that cultural expectation and the fact that their parents were less than forthcoming with their own emotions, Cutie had learned from an early age to associate any display of emotions with weakness. Over time, that association had manifested as a complete avoidance of anything even remotely related to romantic expression. It wasn’t as if they didn’t want to tell him. They wanted to be brave and strong. If they weren’t, they rationalized, Geordi might get sick of them and leave.

When they met Geordi, the unempowered human who lived his whole life like he was the main character in a big, bright musical that would somehow find a way to a happy ending, they realized that it was he who was truly brave and strong. They admired Geordi so much. His tenacity, his fierce, relentless optimism. His ability to presume good existed in everyone. Cutie might have claimed that hearing others’ thoughts was the quickest way to become jaded, but they had a feeling if even Geordi possessed such power, he’d somehow manage to stay his cheery self.

They loved him.

He had a right to know that. And, they surmised, maybe they could take some inspiration from Geordi and hope that expressing themselves openly and completely wouldn’t have the disastrous result they’d convinced themselves was inevitable.

“Cutie?” Geordi asked, bringing them back to the present. His voice made them realize they had retreated into their own overly analytical mind yet again. A habit they used to cope in a world sometimes too full of dizzying thoughts and feelings.

“Geordi,” they responded. “I love you.”

At first, Cutie had thought maybe their indulgence in optimism was foolish because Geordi looked distressed. “I didn’t want to force it out of you or anything,” he stammered. “I don’t know exactly what my aim was when I brought it up, but I…”

“You didn’t force me,” Cutie interrupted briskly. “At all. I wanted to tell you, because it’s what I feel. I’ve felt it for a long time.” They slowly slipped their fingers in between his, feeling quite a bit lighter than when they had sat down. “I was just afraid. You gave me the strength to say it. I love you. And…” They pointed to Geordi’s head, offering a half-smile as a question. At his nod, they entered his mind. I love you, Geordi.

Cutie was glad to see Geordi visibly relax. “Oh, wow,” he marvelled, not expecting how meaningful the statement would be when it resounded in his head. It was like his own private space that he shared with Cutie, and for the first time, it was filled with their love for each other. I love you, too, he couldn’t help thinking, not that he wanted to think about anything else.

Thank you for being as patient with me as you were, they thought. Thanks for being someone I can love. Who loves me. Cutie felt a rush of relief flow into their body, like they were levitating despite never having learned much graviton magic.

Same here, Geordi thought, purposefully teasing them by echoing their standard responses.

They loved that even when they fought, he never held anything back. It made for even their rare fights to be productive. They loved that they could trust him to always say what he meant and to mean whatever he said. It was more comforting than they ever thought possible. Geordi was the rare type of person who you didn’t need access into his head to know what was in his heart.

Can I kiss you? He winked.

Instead of answering, Cutie kissed him.

I love you, they both thought simultaneously.

Geordi sent the email, typo-free and two hours later.

[colossal-fallout]

First time with Reiner Braun ❤

Fem X Reiner

This is a little different. I wrote it so you can insert yourself or an OC.

  Warnings: NSFW. 18+ Smut and Fluff. 

A/N: Slight Canon divergent as Cadets take place when they’re in their late teens/early twenties. Other than that, it’s all the same. 

  Reiner had been acting weird all day; but [Name] couldn’t really blame him.  

The last time they were alone together, they’d ended up locking mouths in a steamy kiss. They hadn’t spoken about it since – they hadn’t really had the chance.  Between training and having their classmates around it was a perfect cover to avoid a potentially awkward conversation.  When Shadis announced that for this exam, they would be teamed up together, they had both internally groaned.  

Well, it was going to happen eventually. They’d had another two years of training, they were bound to wind up alone together again at some point. They’d both made sure that during the entire hike, they didn’t let one silence befall the conversation, which would force them to talk about the inevitable subject of their heated kiss.  

It was quite comical, actually.  

Constant talking either about their task, their friends or at one point even pondered and speculated if a person got a sunburn in front of a cannibal; would the cannibal start watering at the mouth?

Anything to not talk about the kiss.  

It’d been a whole week since the incident and it wasn’t like they didn’t want to address it. They just didn’t want to know the others thought on the matter.  They’d both had serious reservations about it; they were totally focused on training and not fooling around.  

And yet...

The kiss only fanned the flames of the huge crush Reiner has had on her since day one. The crush that, over the last thirteen months, had developed into something a lot deeper.  

He’d kill for her.  

He thought about that only earlier when she made a joke about something and it really tickled him to the core; resulting in a loud belly laugh. So, when the sun was starting to set and they had found a good place to camp for the night... that was when things would inevitably go south.  

“Hey Ba- uh, [Name] ?” Reiner called out in a chilled horror. Not only from the slip of the tongue, but also what he had discovered in their shared backpack.  

[Name] was only a few feet away, starting a campfire when a small laugh left her sweet lips.  

“Did you almost call me Bertolt?”  

No. I almost called you “babe”

“Uh, yeah. Sorry. But we have a problem.”

“What is it?” she frowned, heading over.  

He pulled a large, folded bit of material out of the pack.  

“...We only have one tent.”

She looked at him like he spoke another language.

“So? It’s not the first time we’ve had to share a tent with a partner during training. I had to share one with Jean last year.”  

I bet Jean would have loved that...  

It was a running joke amongst the men about when they had to share sleeping quarters with the women, and how they’d lie on the very edge, all limbs tucked in and never once touching them for fear of a testosterone induced erection.  

“Yeah, but I’m a big guy.” He lied, not once being concerned about that at all.  

“Get over yourself.” She chuckled, nudging him playfully as she returned to what she was doing.  

Reiner solemnly obeyed and began to set up the tent, his frown pulling at his face the entire time.  He will not get any sleep – being so close to... her. Alone... Miles away from anyone.  

After they’d kissed.  

He swallowed hard as he fumbled with the poles, wanting to be out of this situation.  

Reiner Braun was desperately in love with this woman and he was supposed to be keeping away. If they kiss again, he’s a total goner. There would be no way he could reject her if she reciprocated his feelings even in the slightest. Luckily, their kiss had been interrupted so he didn’t know how she truly felt. He thought that if he never knew, it’s a problem he would never have to face.  

His fingers clumsily began to fix things together;  [Name] already having the fire going and preparing dinner.  

His eyes almost began to water at the thought that he was about to get her famous, amazing cooking.  

Sasha had been furious he was paired with her.  

His chest tightened and his head became fuzzy. He wished he didn’t have to be in such a complicated situation; he would just ask her to marry him already.  

“You need help?” her voice called over after he dropped the pole fixtures for the third time.  

“Huh? Uh, no I got it.” He wavered a hand dismissively without turning around.  

What the hell am I going to do? He panics in silence.  

Eventually the sun had set and the tent was erected, the two of them sitting by the fire after they’d eaten. The warm orange glow of the flames encased them cosily as Reiner sat back and patted his stomach in awe.  

“Amazing. As always.” He smiled. “Thank you.”

“I’m glad you liked it.” She beamed beautifully.  

 Surrounded by the trees under the stars and being embraced by the warm glow of the flames; [Name] now began to feel weird about their intimate moment they’d had.  It wasn’t very often they had time alone and her feelings for him remained the same since.  

They sat back, gazing up at the stars in a comfortable silence.  

“It feels like we haven’t stargazed in forever.” [Name] commented quietly. “I bet Marco is looking at them now too.”  

“Yeah, he will be.” Reiner marvelled.  

Another silence.  

He noticed she had been pretty quiet since they began relaxing by the fire.  

[Name] was wondering why he hadn’t mentioned the kiss. He’d had plenty of time now.  

Maybe he regrets it?

She bit her lip at the thought, her eyes lowering to the flames sadly. God, he’d grown on her a hell of a lot and she resented that fact. It hurt to think he didn’t feel the same.  

Reiner noticed this.  

Shit, she looks sad. Is it because he hadn’t mentioned the kiss? Should he ask her? There’s no way he would ever stand for her feeling down, let alone because of him.  

What the hell should I do?!

His brain hurt. More so, his heart.  

She flinched a little in surprise when he slowly creeped his hand across the ground and intentionally skimmed his skin across her fingers. He didn’t look at her though. It was his way of sending an impossible telepathic message of; Don’t be sad. I can’t say it but God, I love you.

She, however, assumed it was an accident.  

Ah hell. I’m going to have to mention it. I can’t see her feeling down.  

He took a deep breath.  

“You alright? You look a little down.” His usual façade of serious, concerned solider coming out.  

“Oh? I’m fine.” She lied.  

He knew she was lying. He knew her too well.  

“It looks like it’s going to rain though.” She noticed the thick clouds that were rolling in, beginning to block their view of the stars. “We should get some sleep.”

“R-right.” Reiner nodded, deflated.  

He didn’t know what he expected. His heart, body and soul ached for her lips against his again, but his mind screamed to stop being an idiot.  

As she went inside to get ready for bed, he stood and began to snuff out the flames of the fire, along with any hope he’d had of being with the woman he was so desperately in love with.  

----

  Sure enough, as they lay facing away from one another, the sounds of soft pattering began to tap the tent above their heads. They lay back-to-back with as big of a gap between them as possible; what the small tent would allow anyway. Reiner’s arms were tucked up around his chest and his eyes were wide.

[Name] had her limbs tucked away too but that was for a different reason – as always when she camped out, she was freezing. It didn’t matter the season. As soon as that sun sank below the horizon, her body temperature would drop.  

Reiner on the other hand was like a big insulated heater, sleeping in just his underwear under his sleeping bag. His heart thudded harshly against his large chest.  

She’s just there! Kiss her! Talk to her! Tell her how you feel...

 He’d been close to telling her a few times over the course of the last month or so. He couldn’t help it. Even before they shared that kiss, his feelings would bubble up to the surface and almost spew out of his mouth. He’d always managed to stop himself though, although it was getting increasingly more difficult each time.  

She was just so... perfect.  

Not only was she extremely attractive and half of his classmates wanted her, but she was strong. Smart. Funny. Caring... His eyes closed in a frown as he listed the endless attributes he loved about her in his head. He was fighting a losing battle, and he knew it.  

Bertolt. Annie. Marcel. I’m sorry. I tried... I really did.  

He glanced back and that’s when he noticed her curled up in a ball, shivering.  

His eyebrows furrowed.  “...You cold?”  

“Y-yeah.”  

He instantly turned onto his side to face her, his sleeping bag rustling against the fabric of the tent.  

“You should have said something. ‘C mere.”  

With a sigh he sat up and began unzipping her sleeping bag.  

“What are you doing?” her teeth chatted.  

“Helping you warm up. I doubt you wanna get sick and miss training.”

She averted her eyes away from him when he unzipped his bag and fastened them together into a double. She knew he slept in his shorts.  

Her breath caught in her throat when he wrapped his big, strong arms around her and pulled her back against his warm chest, heat rolling off him and encasing her like a huge bear was holding her. His scent rolled off him and embraced her sense of smell, relaxing her immediately.

He kept his pelvis away from her, his manhood already stirring awake and he didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable.  

“T-thank you.” She whispered, still trembling.  

“Don’t mention it.” He sighed, silently kicking himself.  

I definitely won’t be getting any sleep now.  

Her heart almost stopped when his head rested and lay between her neck and shoulder, his hot breath blanketing her skin. Rushes of unexpected heat ran down her body to in-between her legs and seemed to just pool there.  

His brows furrowed behind her; inhaling her intoxicating scent silently.  

Although he was trying his hardest not to brush his hips against her, he still felt so comfortable having her in his arms like this, like she was supposed to be in them. He was meant to protect her. To care for her. To love her.  

His mind fluttered back to how he’d almost told her he loved her before. He’d hinted so hard but she just looked at him like he was crazy, not understanding what he was trying to tell her. When he was around [Name], it was like all of his troubles just melted away. Colours seemed brighter, his worries were brushed aside and life was just... amazing. She made him laugh, he could tell her anything (almost) and she always knew what to say to make him feel better after a particularly rough day. But to him, the best part of it all was how excited she got him for the future. One that was bleak and full of sorrow was spun upside down and into a promising one, brimming with all possibilities.

“I have something to tell you.” He said softly, not able to stop himself this time.  

Maybe it was being this close to her that sent him over the edge. Or maybe it made it easier that she was facing away from him.  

“Hm?” she hummed softly; her eyes closed and enjoying the warm embrace.  

“...I love you.”  

That was it. It was out.

There was no way to suck those words back into his lungs.  

The tense, pregnant silence within the tent was only filled by the light tapping of the rain against the material that covered them.

He felt her tense in surprise, her eyes flying open.  

She swivelled around to face him, her eyes searching his narrow golden orbs for any sign of deception.  

But there wasn’t any.  

A crimson flush washed over his cheeks.  

“I... I mean, you know –” he began before she silenced him by pressing her lips against his.  

Both of their eyebrows pulled back as if pleading above closed eyes, his hand cupping her face, thrilled to be kissing her once more.  

She pulled away, her own pink hue colouring her face.  

“You... Love me?” she asked, her voice soft and sweet.  

He pressed his head against hers, closing his eyes and nodding.  

“ [Name] , I’m crazy about you.” He whispered in honesty. “I always have been.”

“...How crazy?” she teased, trying to tear away any awkwardness or negative feelings in his confession.  

He smirked. She knows just how to make him comfortable.  

He grinned slyly, looking in her eyes.  

“Oh, absolutely insane. I should be getting carted away to the asylum, with Sasha and her potatoes behind me.”

She laughed beautifully, her heart swelling with joy. Even from that dumb little exchange, confirmed to her that she definitely felt the same.  

“So, you don’t regret that kiss...? Last week?”

“Of course not.” He replied, eyes returning to a desperate pleading. “I was just having a hard time accepting that I’ve come to cadets to be a soldier and.... Ended up meeting the woman I wanna marry.”

Every word that left his lips felt like a warm pleasant jab to her heart.  

“You... Wanna marry me?” She whispers, totally blown away from the intensity of this confession.  

“I do.” He admitted shyly. “You don’t deserve anything less. It’s just how I feel... Sorry”

“You know...” she whispered shyly. “It’s more efficient to share body heat when you’re both naked.”

His eyes enlarged and breath caught in his throat.  

“That’s if... You’d want to.” She added adorably.  

“Are you sure?” he whispered, praying she would say yes.  

She nodded in reply.  

“I want you, Reiner.” She breathed. “I love you too. I want... you to make me yours. I want to be yours.”

Reiner was bombarded with emotion.  

Elation. Excitement. Arousal.

Not to mention he was beginning to wonder if this were a dream. If he were going to cruelly wake up next to Bertolt and his weird sleeping positions.  

There’d been countless times he’s imagined her utter those words in his head; sometimes while stroking his own cock.  

He’d lost count how many times he’d furiously tugged himself while she occupied his mind. But as his feelings for her deepened, it became less and less so; guilt always creeping into his conscience. He just respected her too much.

He propped himself up on his elbow, running his now trembling fingers through her hair.  

“I don’t want to hurt you.” He breathes.

“You won’t.” She shook her head. “I mean, it’s okay if you don’t want to, I under –”  

He put his arms under the sleeping bag with great speed and shuffled a little, before pulling his shorts out and throwing them to the side.  

She let out a laugh when he returned to his original position with haste.  

He returned her laugh, rubbing his nose against hers.  

“Okay...” she muttered shyly. “Look over there for a moment”

He turned around obediently as she began to nervously undress under the now warm sleeping bag.  

All he could hear under the movement of her undressing herself was his heart pounding in his head.  

There’s no way this is real and happening.  

His cock was already hard at the thought of her undressing inches away from him. His previous reservations about being teamed up with her were quickly washed away as she threw her clothes to the side, before nestling back down and hiding under the cover.  

“Alright... You can come back.” She informs him.  

At the speed of a firing bullet, he turned back around; painfully keeping his eyes glued to hers.  

His arm flinched, about to pull her back into his embrace but he hesitated.  

“Are... you sure?” He asked again, not able to believe the situation.  

“Yes.” She giggled, nervously.  

His eyes enlarged and jaw slackened when he felt her satin soft skin against his, her bare breasts pressing against his hard chest and her lower stomach and groin against his solid erection. 

A gasp parted her lips as she felt, not only how hard he was, but how big.  

His arms snaked around her, his narrow orbs keeping their gaze onto her orbs as he pulled her now naked form against his.  

“R-Reiner...” she couldn’t help but stammer, her face heating up as well as her insides.  

A pink hue raises over his cheeks, not having really thought through the situation. He was nervous. He was excited. He was close to hyperventilating. 

Her lips softly press against Reiner’s once more, her fingers grazing across his scalp, her breathing heavy and needing. 

His arm snakes around her stomach, his brow pulled down and creased while his nose pushes out a blow of air, his heart hammering and his cock leaking with pre-cum. She could feel it weeping against her flesh as it throbbed and danced against her lower stomach. 

She pulls back for a moment; “Reiner. Only take me if you’re going to cherish me. This won’t be a one time thing for me...” 

He catches her gaze, lips parted and eyes still hungry. “Of course. I meant what I said.” 

She smiles - elated at his words as she returns her kiss, her hands roaming his ridged, solid muscles. 

His mouth moves down to her neck, slow and tender kisses - each one sending jolts of searing hot electric through her entirety. Reiner’s breath is deep; quivering and panting as he tries to hold back his eagerness and excitement. 

“I’ve wanted you for so long...” He groans, his large palm pushing her arm above her head as he hovers over her a little, his fingers interlocking with her own, still kissing her deeply. 

The pink hue across his face was deepening to more of a crimson, his eyes heavy lidded and jaw slack the entire time. The way he kisses her is with such compassion, such tenderness. He grazes his large nose against hers, hands caress her hair as he keeps himself steady over her, before gingerly rolling on top of her completely, keeping himself suspended with his forearms. 

He made sure every single graze, every grope was as gentle as possible - afraid of his lumbering huge form would somehow break her as they explored one another’s bodies, their tongues entwining in a slow dance within their mouths. Deep, short groans vibrated his throat and chest from time to time, and not once did that furrowed look of desperation leave his face. 

 The only sounds that could be heard was their kisses, whines and groans as well as their laboured breath and the pattering of rain against the tent. 

He suddenly stops their kiss, placing his head against hers and rubbing his large thumb across her cheek, back and forth. 

“I’m happy to just do this.” He breathes, wanting to prove to her that he really was just so happy she felt the same. “We don’t have to do anything else.” 

“I want to...” She replies, the snake coiled within her wrapped far too tightly to be ignored now. “I want you to make me yours. That’s...if you’d like.” 

He nods - returning his kiss, his top lip folding as his lusted haze results in him missing his mark slightly. God it was hard for him not to touch her between her legs. But he’s a gentleman. He didn’t want to unless he knew one hundred per cent that she was sure. 

Taking his fingertips, he nervously and slowly grazes them down her stomach to her pubic bone, pausing before taking a leap of courage - his calloused pads grazing down her clitoris and to her soaked lips. 

They both gasp at the sensation. The feeling of his warm, large fingers against her most intimate area was indescribable. And for him, her thick slick was heavenly. 

“Is this all for me...?” He whispers in awe and disbelief, his shoulder flexing with his movements as he continues to slowly stroke her. 

She nods, biting her lip. 

“Sh~~~it.” He swallows hard, eyes closing for a moment before returning to hers. “It’s my first time. I won’t last long.” 

“I don’t care.” She groans, pulling him by his head for another deep kiss. 

 As much as he wanted to enter her, he refused to allow himself. Instead his lips trail down her body, her eyes locked onto his broad back flexing with every tiny movement as his head moves, his lips connecting with every inch of skin it could find - his hands gently rubbing and massaging - memorising every single gasp from her mouth. Every hitch of breath. He would remember where he’d been when she made those noises and made sure he damn well took it all in. 

“Reiner, I can’t take it.” She eventually moans, writhing beneath him, fingers running through her own hair. “I need you. Please...” 

He instantly returns to her face, cupping it and his muscular back hunches - his free hand grabbing the large base of his shaft. 

“You ready for me, baby?” He breathes. 

She nods. 

He lines up his gleaming head before pushing gently, her tiny entrance being invaded by him as he hisses, her back bending with a loud moan. 

“ [Name]...” He whimpers, totally overwhelmed both with physical stimulation and emotion. 

He pushes again, a little firmer his head popping in past the first hurtle. 

“You okay?” He asks, sounding like he’s just finished sprinting a whole cross-country race. 

“Yeah...” 

He pushes again, her tight insides slowly ingesting him like a snake with a large meal - her ridges massaging him as they spasm with glee around him - his moans now a lot louder than before as he jitters to a stop at the hilt. 

“Fuck...” His tone sounds like he’s about to burst into tears as he slowly starts to pull out and slide back in again. 

The full feeling of Reiner Braun was better than ecstasy, his girth pushing and stretching her, his cock bending up slightly at the tip, already pushing against her g-spot as he trembles above her. With each slow thrust, her pleasure was pushed to an impossible new high, her nails sinking into his large back as she clung onto him for dear life - tears pooling at the corners of her orbs from how amazing it all felt. Like the only two people in the world were her and him, souls connected and swirling around the cosmos in the eternal dance of lovers. 

 “I can’t... Reiner. It’s too good.” She sobs, her insides now pulling in a rhythm as her coil tightens more and more. “I’m going...” 

“Oh, baby...” He groans, eyes rolling as he plunges a little faster. “Me too. It feels so - n’urgh. So good...” 

“Reiner!” She sobs hysterically as she snaps, coming undone around him as her legs tremble and head throws back. 

 As she unravels around him, her name leaves his lips over and over and over again, each time louder than the last as his thick and large cumshot explodes inside of her, his atomic detonation causing mass devastation as his legs quiver, eyes cross and even a bit of drool hangs from his mouth. 

 You are one special person to capture Reiner’s affections while he held such high walls around his heart for reasons not yet known to you. But you managed it, and god is it such a beautiful thing. 

[earnestly-endlessly]

Hi! Do you have any Cherik Army AUs? I've managed to find just 3.

Hi Anon, thanks for the ask. I found some good Army AUs, though some might not quite fall into the category of 'Army AU'. There are, surprisingly, few Army AUs that I have found, whereas there are several military and war AUs, but those don't necessarily involve an army. I did include a variety that involve an army in one way or another, though some fit the bill better than others. I hope you find some that you enjoy!!

Cherik Army AU

I Want to Guard Your Dreams And Visions – luninosity

Summary: I was reading Barbara Hambly’s Abigail Adams mystery novels, and then Erik/Charles American Revolutionary War AU happened. Little snippet in which they share a tent, drink coffee, and provide support to each other.

The Eggnog Riot – Sophia_Bee

Summary: 1826. The American Military Academy in West Point. The day after Christmas. Cadet Erik Lehnsherr wakes up naked with a certain cadet Xavier sprawled across his chest. He can only blame the eggnog.

No Man’s Land – ikeracity

Summary: It's 1914 in Ypres, Belgium. British soldier Charles Xavier has been in the trenches for four months of endless artillery fire, bone-deep cold, and constant fear of the enemy. But on Christmas Eve, the gunfire falls silent, and they climb out of their trenches for a Christmas truce. Charles, of course, meets Erik, the German soldier across the way.

My Land’s Only Borders Lie Around My Heart – pseudoneems

Summary: WW1 Christmas truce of 1914. Opposing soldiers Erik and Charles meet.

Le soldat – Iggyassou

Summary: Erik is in the trenches, trying to survive the war so that he can go back to Charles, his young lover waiting for him back at home.

Names – Squeegee

Summary: In the summer of 1917, British soldier Charles Xavier finds himself taking cover in a shell crater.

Not sure if the 'graphic' tag applies or not, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

Quell a storm with pen and ink – patroclux

Summary: Charles had spared his life. That was not something he could easily repay.

They wrote letters to each other for two years, until Charles was pulled out of the war from a sudden illness and Erik remained to fight for a cause he didn't believe in. One that ultimately had no effect; one that stole away four years of his life.

Traumatized and persecuted, Erik applied for a post at Janus, a lighthouse in the middle of the Irish Sea. He thought being alone would do him good.

Despite the letters and despite the love, Erik didn't expect Charles to find him.

Hier steh ich an den Marken meiner Tage – MonstrousRegiment

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr is a spy in the SS, and his British liaison is strategist Charles Xavier. Their relationship from the moment they meet to a year after the end of the war.

Theme and Variations: War – ninemoons42

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr is a musical prodigy and a man destined for great things and great stages. But his life is shattered by a terrible accident that leaves him blind and trying to find his way back to his life, his music, and his place in the world.

Then he meets Charles Xavier, an agent of Section 8 of the Military Intelligence Directorate of Providence, and he finds himself listening in to clandestine radio transmissions and clicking Morse code, and these sounds are part and parcel of a war that can only take place in the shadows and the hidden places of history.

Strib nicht von Mir – ravenoftheninerealms

Summary: A squad of Allied Forces, led by Charles Xavier, liberates the Nazi concentration camp where Erik was being held prisoner.

Cold foxholes, warm hearts – oddegg

Summary: Basically, this is Band of Mutants. A little slice of life in Bastogne.

Photographs and Memories – tirsynni

Summary: When war-battered Erik Lehnsherr met Charles Xavier, the man kneeling in the dirt and whispering to a lost refugee child, Erik feared his days of running from his deviance was done.

Marching Home – Quietbang

Summary: For a prompt on the meme asking for fic dealing with the fact that, in comics canon, Charles served in the Korean war.

War meant something different to this generation, Charles knew.

Crash on the Levy (Down in the Flood) – Quietbang

Summary: “This is much bigger than you think. You're in the middle of a war, and you don't even realize, do you?”

He pauses, and answers his own question.“No, of course you don't. How silly of me."

The Knight and the Dagger – Dow

Summary: A Lieutenant in the Soviet Army, Erik Lensherr had no other goals than to find the man that killed his parents. But when a discovery yields a little boy with wings like an angel, Erik is shocked to realize that he isn’t alone. There are other people like him, both dangerous and alluring.

Lifelong Service – Pookaseraph

Summary: Erik thinks he should be the one to teach their recruits hand-to-hand combat; Charles makes a persuasive argument to the contrary.

Footsteps of uprooted lovers – ninemoons42

Summary: Against a turbulent backdrop of artistic, social, and political upheaval, the playwright Charles Xavier and the photographer Erik Lehnsherr find themselves meeting under less-than-polite circumstances, but part rather more amicably than they'd met.

When they find each other again in a Barcelona that is falling inexorably toward war, they find themselves taking up arms, each in his own way, and together they join a struggle for freedom, for love, and for their very lives.

Dear Soldier – Lindstrom, ToriTC198

Summary: "Dear Soldier,

I pray that this package finds you well. The organization gave us a list of odds and ends that you might need, but I thought that a person so far from home might appreciate something more than soap and tube socks."

When Charles' school decides to send care packages to the soldiers fighting in Vietnam, he chooses to also include a letter and a few personal touches. When Staff Sergeant Erik is the recipient of that particular care package it will spur a relationship that will change them both.

Fortunate Son – blueink13

Summary: he days leading up to and during Alex's deployment in Vietnam. Everyone handles it in their own way. Some handle better than others.

You’re Here – Deshonana

Summary: Everyone decides its a good idea not to tell Erik when his boyfriend comes home from the military.

Welcome Home –  loveydoveyecstasy

Summary: It's been two years since Charles was deployed to Afghanistan, and Erik can't wait to pick him up at the airport.

When Secrets have Secrets – ximeria

Summary: The arguments that take place in General Xavier's office when General Lehnsherr has a bad day are legendary. Quite frankly, no one really knows what's going on and if the two men have it their way, no one ever will.

Quiet Company – Sophia_Bee

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr is always on the move. He's spent the last many years going from war torn country to war torn country telling the stories of the people there through photographs. Then one of his pictures is selected as a winner for the Pulitzer Prize and Erik finds himself stuck in London for longer than he wants. He ends up with an assignment to photograph Charles Xavier, a wealthy philanthropist who is intrigued to find himself working with a Pulitzer-winning war photographer. Erik is far less intrigued by someone he considers privileged and out of touch. Both of their lives are about to change in ways they couldn't imagine.

The City is Ours – RedStockings

Summary: Erik felt his heart racing with excitement, lightened, and for once felt joyful. Charles had looked at him, really looked at him, and there had been something there, a knowing of a kind. As the soldiers laughed amongst each other, and joked each other about who would succeed in marrying the boy, Erik made himself a silent vow. Charles was going to be his, and nothing would keep him from having him. He’d marry him, and he’d save him, and Charles would love him for it.

Not even the war could keep them apart... right?

Sign of the Times – dsrobertson

Summary: Casablanca-ish AU.

Charles Xavier meets Erik Lehnsherr in Paris, 1937. They spend the next two years with one another, stupid in-love, until war comes heavy in September 1939. Erik leaves for Poland and the Resistance movement there, promising to return. Charles is left in Paris, where Nazi jackboots march in, Summer of 1940. He becomes a member of the underground French Resistance, publishing illegal newsletters, leaflets, until news comes through in February 1942: Erik is dead. Charles throws himself into more dangerous work, meeting with Communists, helping derail a German train, and he does too much, goes too far. His friends find him safe passage out of France, out across the Mediterranean, to Morocco, Casablanca. It is here he finds Erik, alive.

The Waste Land – nekosmuse

Summary: The White Queen and her Shadow King sit on their throne, safe behind the psionic shields of the Walled City. The armies of Genosha batter uselessly at the gates, a war locked in stalemate. Magneto, camped in the frozen mud, receives word the Citadel intends to send a telepath to the front lines. The same telepath he met two years ago, who sat across a carved wooden chess set and offered Magneto the first friendly smile in a lifetime. The same telepath who still haunts his dreams.

Winter Comes With a Knife – RedStockings

Summary: It apparently came to no one’s surprise that the war-mage Erik Lehnsherr took up residence in the Dark Keep. I knew he was going to choose my sister, Raven, to be his apprentice so why wouldn’t he let me go? What did he want from me?

My name is Charles Xavier, I can read minds and use magic. I’ve met Kings and Queens, mages and magic users. I’ve travelled through lay-lines and jumped through the Dark Void… but none of that really matters.

I am leading an army into war, I am scared and I never wanted this. I’ve come to realise that what I want, rode into my life when I was still a child. Now he’s out there, ready to charge into battle. Ready to die for me.

Polaris – LastAmericanMermaid

Summary: Charles Xavier is 19 years old, doe-eyed and soft; Erik Lehnsherr is 24 years old, steely-hard and bitter. One is a soldier, the other a refugee. Both are mutants. There will be pain, oh yes.

(An AU in which Charles is a wounded British soldier, Erik is the German hiding in France who nurses him back to health, and the contents of this fic are best read to the soundtrack of Atonement.)

Note: Unfinished

MEDIC! – paladin_danse

Summary: A British airborne medic finds himself alone and afraid behind enemy lines. When he decides to save the life of an S.S. German officer he finds wounded in the snow, he has no idea the choice he has made will alter the course of the war—and their lives—forever.

Note: Sadly unfinished

Suicide is Painlesss – weethreequarter 

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr did not become a doctor to pick bullets out of children. Unfortunately the US Army had other ideas.

Stuck in the middle of the Korean War, Erik and his fellow civilian surgeons have to battle not only the war, but also weather, mud, and boredom. And that's without mentioning Major Sebastian Shaw who thinks war is the best thing that's ever happened to him and never should've been allowed to pick up a scalpel, or Colonel William Stryker who may or may not work for the CIA and probably doesn't even know himself.

Throw in new arrival Captain Charles Xavier, and Erik is in for a very interesting war.

Note: Unfinished

A Light That Never Goes Out – R_Cookie

Summary: It was meant to be the war to end all wars; these two men were never supposed to meet. One a German Jew, the other a British surgeon. The odds that their paths should cross were next to none - but War defies the expected. It always has, and always will.

From the beaches of Dunkirk to the treacherous slopes of Monte Cassino - this is their story.

WWII AU.

Note: Unfinished

[cucumbers-and-olives]

Enemies To Lovers- Part Two (Charlie Gillespie x reader)

i forgot to post this last night, oops! here it is now...

<<<part one—part three>>>

Summary: Its New Years, and you fare asked to stay in town for the annual New Years party. But what happens before and during the party? Well that’s a story!

Category: it’s a league of its own

Fandom: JATP

Paring: Charlie Gillespie x reader

Word Count: 1,960 (woah)

⚠️PLEASE READ⚠️ Warnings/Includes: if mentions of drinking, drugs, (getting) roofied/drugged, strong language and typos

Please make sure you are comfortable before reading this chapter.

A/N: so it’s a few days late, i hope you guys enjoy this NYE fic a few days after

Mandatory Thanking of the Betas: THANK YOU LOVES!!! you two literally hold me up and help me make my ideas into their finished product, so thank you!

AO3 link here (will be up by 1/7 10pm est, i’m have wifi issues at the moment)

Please don’t repost my work without my permission, in part or whole. My work can also be found on AO3 under the same username. Thank you!

“Y/N!” A woman said entering your room. It had been a week since you had arrived in the Gillespie home. In that short amount of time you had met all of Charlie’s younger cousins (there were only three, but they were a handful), celebrated Christmas the Gillespie way, and gotten into a total of five fights with Charlie over a range of things, but each one had a bigger fall out than the last. You supposed that was why at every meal your spot was next to his, an obvious way that Ms.Gillespie tried to “bring the two of you closer together.”

“Hun, you okay?” Ms.Gillespie said, her hand resting on yours. “You’ve been staring at that shirt for a while.”

“I’m alright, thank you,” You said, placing your shirt into the suitcase that lay on the floor. You were packing to leave, but you could tell that the older woman’s appearance in your room meant that you wouldn’t be leaving on your flight. You held your breath as she spoke.

“I’d like to invite you to stay through New Years. You’ve been such a help with the younger kids, and it’s been delightful to have you here.” She must have been telepathic at that point because she rushed out her next point. “And Charlie has agreed to play nice.”

“Ms.Gillespie, you are so kind, but I don’t think I have enough money-” You said, not wanting to overstay your welcome any longer.

“Nonsense, nonsense!” She cut you off. “I knew you would say this, it’s the kind of person you are, and so Charlie has found you a flight and we are paying for it.” You could tell that there was something that she was leaving out, but you could get hit with that later. Ignoring your work and your family was something that you were good at. And besides, hanging out at the Gillespie house was fun.

“Alright!” You agreed. She sweeped you up in a hug.

“Wonderful! Have you had lunch yet?” You shook your head. “Well that is perfect, I’ve got some sandwiches, so I expect to see you down in a few, okay?”

You nodded, and with that, she left, a smile on her face. You were excited to stay longer, but would Charlie’s promise hold? Would he really be nice for the remainder of your stay?

“Let’s hope so,” You said, closing your door and making your way to the kitchen. You should have been paying attention, but you weren’t. Bumping into someone, you both landed on the floor, your phones and other things flying.

“I am so sorry,” You said, picking up the various items. As you reached for one of the notebooks, your hands met and you finally saw who you had bumped into.

“Is this a game to you?” Charlie asked. His eyes were tear-stained, and you slowly noticed that some of the pages had tears on them too.

“I-” You picked his phone up along with yourself off the floor. “Are you okay?” You asked softly, tucking his phone into his back pocket, where you knew it had been before.

“Does it look like it? God, will you just fuck off! When are you leaving anyway?” He grumbled, his previously sad tone taking on a very harsh one. His hand that used to lay by his side was now in a very tight fist.

“I’m leaving after New Years. Your mom asked me to stay, and she’s paying for the flight back,” You said, answering honestly. You didn’t know what happened when he got angry- really, truly angry. And you didn’t want to see it.

“That’s why she had me- Oh my god, no. Just no.” He barked, stalking off.

“Yeah, you know what, fuck you too,” You whispered hotly, calming yourself down as you walked into the kitchen.

~

“Cause I don’t care when I’m with my baby yeah,” You sang along with the T.V. You enjoyed dancing to the Wii, and you hadn't minded when Anna had asked you to join. But the same song had played over five times now.

As the song ended, you placed your control down. “Gimme ten minutes, okay? I just gotta get some water,” She nodded, and you stepped out of the room and entered the kitchen.

“Is it this cabinet?” You said, opening the cabinet that you guessed the glasses were in. They weren’t in that one. Or the next, or the next or the next.

“Excuse me,” Charlie said, stepping around you to open a cabinet you could have sworn you had opened. He grabbed a glass and closed the cabinet, and poured himself a glass of water.

You opened the cabinet to grab a glass, but they seemed just out of your reach. You got on your tiptoes, and your fingers just brushed the edge of the glass.

He let out a little chuckle and grabbed the glass, and filled it up. “Thank you,” You said, reaching for it.

“Oh, you thought this was for you?” He feigned shock. “This is for Anna, she asked me to grab her a glass.”

“Are you kidding me?” You shouted after his retreating form. Sighing, you decided you could do without water as you walked back into the game room.

He sat smugly on the couch, sipping at his glass of water.

“Come on, let’s play!” Anna said, tugging at your hand.

“What song?” You asked, looking to the screen as she pressed play.

“I love it when you call me senorita, I wish I could pretend I didn’t need ya,” Anna sang to the track.

You felt the beat and began to follow the moves on the screen. You knew Charlie was staring at you, and so you made everything bigger. More power, more accuracy, more everything.

When the song ended, he walked out of the room, but he backtracked to whisper something in your ear.

“Strictly professional, Ms.Y/L/N. You aren’t that good of a dancer.”

~

“What do you think of this, Anna?” You said, showing the young girl the sparkling black dress you had on.

“You need more color! And that’s too shiny, and you wore it to Christmas dinner, and-“ She could have kept going, but she caught sight of something in your closet and pulled it out. “This! This is perfect!” Red, off-the shoulder, a leg slit, it was something you would never wear in a million years.

“I’ll… try it on?” You said, and Anna smiled as you stepped into the bathroom.

You pulled it off the black dress and put on the red one, but as you zipped up the back of the dress there was something in the way. A little card.

“Huh,” You were confused as you pulled it out, but as you read it, everything made sense.

You placed the card down to look at yourself in the mirror. The dress fit perfectly, falling down every curve perfectly. It wasn’t you that you saw in the mirror. It was who you pictured in your mind when you thought of yourself.

“Can I see it now?” Anna asked, knocking on the door.

“Yeah,” You said, opening the door.

“Woah,” She gasped softly, looking you up and down. “I think Charlie’s gonna love it.”

Before you could say anything in response, Anna ran out of the room.

~

“Really?”’ You said as you accepted the call on your phone. “I look amazing, but why?”

“Remind me what you’re talking about?” Savannah asked.

“Your acting is on point, Savannah Lee May.”

“Ooh, full name, I’m so scared!” She laughed. “You look good in red, and I knew you would need a dress for New Years!”

“Ya know, if you want to switch to facetime, all you need to do is ask. And the answer is yes.” You rolled your eyes as she squealed, quickly switching to facetime.

“You look stunning!” She gasped. “I wish I could pull off a dress that good!” She whined a bit.

“Who are you talking to?” Owen hollered in the background.

“Y/N! She looks amazing in the dress, come see!”

“Hey Y/N,” Owen said, stepping into frame. He made a face at Savannah. “If she wears that, you have to deal with Charlie when he calls to ruin my New Years.”

“What does he mean?” You asked. Savannah muted herself and had a heated argument with Owen before answering you.

“When we were drunk one time, Charlie talked about his ex. Specifically, the dress she always wore. A red off the shoulder with,” You cut her off.

“With one leg slit. Well that is specific, and I am not the woman that he wants to see in it.”

“It goes further,” She said. “The only people that heard that conversation were Jer, Caroline, Owen and I. So he’ll know that I did this, and he will call Owen to let out his frustration. He’s a nice guy, in that he’ll only yell at men. Truly yell.”

“Wow. So you are sending me into a death trap?”

“Not exactly-“ Owen’s phone rang, cutting her off.

“It’s him! Get over here and answer the phone for me please, Sav!” Owen shouted.

“Who?”

“Anna must’ve told him. She found the dress in my stuff.” You told her and she sighed, hanging up.

~

Music played loudly, filling every corner of the house. And where the music was, there were people. Maybe 75 or so, but it was only 11:30, and you had a feeling that number would increase. You didn’t know what, or more specifically who you were looking for as you scanned the room you were in.

“Hey doll, have a drink!” A random man said, and as he walked by he passed a drink to you. A clear but faintly yellow liquid was in the cup. You didn’t want to know what it was.

“Bottoms up-“ You said, about to tip the cup back and down it before someone pulled it out of your hands.

“I may despise you, but I am not about to let you get roofied,” Charlie said, handing you a beer. “Don’t you know that you have to be holding something at one of these kinds of parties?”

“I didn’t realize it was gonna be one of these kinds of parties,” You muttered, taking a swig of the beer.

“It’s always been like this,” He said, watching all of the couples.

“How close are we to midnight?” You asked.

“Maybe 30 miniutes? I’m gonna go see how my family is.” He said, leaving you in your tiny corner.

~

“10,” The room continued to chant.

You searched the room for Charlie, or at least a familiar face. Couples surrounded you, preparing to kiss at midnight. And you, like a 5 year old, prepared to cover your eyes.

“9,” There was no sign of him, but there were a few men around the room with a similar haircut. You slowly ruled them out.

“8,” His hair was too short.

“7,” His was too dark.

“6,” He was too short.

“5, 4,” You started to give up, just as you saw a couple emerge from one of the back rooms. That couldn’t be him, could it?

“3!” But that was his voice.

“2!” And that was his jacket. Your face dropped as you prepared yourself. You knew what the incoming trainwreck was but you couldn’t look away.

“Happy New Year!” The couples shouted before pulling their lover close.

You watched as his lips met hers. You looked for a bit too long before tearing your eyes away and stalking to your room. But you couldn’t help but look back, and when you did, your eyes met his for a moment.

And the mood shifted.

~

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