#i am swimming in catalysts!!!!!

[reriart]

maybe it’s the tav I’m currently playing but I am so fixated on a tav absolutely convinced Astarion does not find her attractive despite the obvious, him sleeping with her x2, openly complimenting her etc etc and that leading too sloppy, emotional sex between the two, what do you think?

Dear anon,

thank you so much for asking me, I hope you'll like it! Since I suffer from body dysmorphia, I thought I'd put this topic inside the fic, I hope it's ok for you!

Let me worship you

Tags/CW: +18 MDNI, afab Tav, very smut, body dysmorphia, plus size tav, depression and panic attacks, Tav is a bit insecure and jealous, oral and piv sex, body worshipping, Astarion is a lil angry, tadpole connection, the infamous knee, Astarion is both dom and sub here.

English is not my native language. Link to AO3.

Divider by @cafekitsune

‘What's wrong with me?’

That question keeps buzzing in your head, loud as if you had a wasp nest right in your skull instead of a tadpole.

‘Why can't I be as beautiful like them?’

The knot in your stomach makes the bowl of fruit porridge Gale prepared, now in your hands, appear heavy and uninviting. The scent of apples, enticing until moments before, makes you nauseous.

Your gaze rests first on Lae'zel, then on Shadowheart and finally on Karlach. The toned body of the githyanki, the refined beauty of the half-elf, the marble muscles of the tiefling.

Then you observe yourself: your soft belly, your scarred skin, your ruined nails. Your right hand touches your round cheek, your hair loosely tied back. You try to push back the tears and you are out of breath, heart beating faster. You look up and notice Astarion's ruby-red ones staring back at you, one eyebrow raised and jaw clenched.

‘Apologies,’ you say, standing up sharply, your voice louder than expected. ‘I think I'll go for a swim. Sorry Gale, I don't have much of an appetite.’

‘Don't worry, if you get hungry again I'll cook you something later,’ he replies, his round, soft eyes barely concealing concern. This is the third time this week you've skipped meals because of your anxiety attacks.

The others continue chatting, but as you leave the camp, you feel eyes hovering over your back.

With almost painful slowness, you reach the small beach behind the rocks. Wyll and Karlach are laughing as Gale rambles on about something as usual - you don't catch the words as you undress, but you can sense the lightness of their conversation, a conversation you would like to witness and laugh about, too.

But the voice in your head - and not your prismatic friend's one - but your own, the darker side of you, only complains. ‘You've gained weight’, “you're horrible”, “Astarion will leave you”.

You don't really know how to define the relationship between you and him. You haven't declared eternal love for each other or who knows what, and you're pretty sure he's simply using you as a walking blood bag and easy sex.

Probably, after every night spent together, he has done nothing but whine about you.

The thought of the vampire mocking your feelings is the catalyst that finally triggers your tears. You feel them, warm against your skin, silently sliding down to your lips.

You lick one away, and wipe the rest with the back of your hand.

Your foot treads the water, trying to sense whether the temperature is acceptable or not. It is a little cold, actually, but perhaps that is just what you need right now. You glide silently through the small, dark waves, which wrap around you like a blanket. You put your head under the water, inhibiting all external noises.

You have always loved water. There, you do not feel the weight of your body, you do not see it for what it is, and when you sink, then all contact with the outside world disappears. You let gravity bring your body to the surface, and you spread your arms wide. You gaze at the moon, full and pale, wishing to be just a tiny dot in the sky.

Your vision blurs with tears and you close your eyes, letting the gentle rhythm of the water lull you.

Just as you are about to open your eyes again, you feel claws grab your shoulder and you're about to scream, but a hand blocks any sound you try to make. You notice two red irises staring at you and pointed ears peeping out from a cloud of silver hair.

‘Astarion, what the heck, you scared the hell out of me!’ you mutter as soon as you free your lips. ‘I didn't hear you coming.’

‘That was the point,’ he replies, oddly serious, his flirty, sassy façade strangely lacking. ‘We need to talk.’

Your heart jumps back to your throat once more as anxiety assails you. You spin around so that you are back on your feet and turn to face him.‘Is something wrong?

Do you need blood? I haven't eaten and I don't have much strength, but if you…’

‘That's the point,’ he snips sharply, his gaze as piercing as one of his daggers. ‘And I'm not talking about the blood. Why aren't you eating?’

It is not the first time Astarion has asked this: it had already happened in the past few days, yet he seemed more concerned. Now… he looks almost furious.

‘I'm not hungry, okay?"

‘No, it's not okay,’ he replies dryly, his thick white eyebrows wrinkling his forehead.

‘What, are you afraid your roaming snack has no more blood for you?’ The answer escapes your lips in a tone between ironic and hysterical and you roll your eyes. ‘Don't worry, as you can clearly see I'm not starving, and I'm sure you won't have any of these problems either while I'm around.’

Astarion's eyes grow big with astonishment and you see him step back, as far as he can, into the water.

‘Is… is that what you think you are to me? A snack?’ His voice is broken, bitter. ‘Do you value what's between us so poorly?’

The feelings of guilt and anger grow in tandem. ‘Tell me, Astarion, is it not the truth? Perhaps I am the only thing vaguely fuckable and edible h-’

His lips crash against yours as he grasps both your cheeks with his hands and brings them to himself. You hear a low, violent growl resonate in his ribcage as his tongue creeps out to seek yours. His fingers then sink into your hair, leaving you breathless.

Holding you close, he pulls his mouth away just far enough to whisper Inveniam viam. In the blink of wings, you find yourself on the beach.

‘I didn't know Misty Steps also worked on…’

‘Don't change the topic,’ he growls against your ear. Suddenly, you realise the dangerous proximity. The magic of the water has vanished, your body - what you hate most in the world - once again exposed to the moon's glow. You look around, searching hopelessly for your clothes.

'Eyes. On. Me.’ he orders, and for a second you feel yourself shiver as his icy hand grabs your chin and forces you to look at him.

‘Now listen carefully.’

You swallow and nod a shy yes with your head after he let you go.

‘You're seeing yourself as a monster again, is that true?’ he asks, stroking one cheek with the back of his hand. ‘Because of the way you look.’

‘Don't you? Look at me, Astarion. You could have anyone. You have a lot of opportunities.’

He pinches the back of his nose with his fingers and inhales. ‘… And to think it must be a monster to make you see the reality of things! But I suppose there's no other way.’

His lips are on you again, but this time it's different. You see yourself from Astarion's point of view and you feel everything he feels: your soft lips, your skin hot to the touch, your sighs, the accelerated beating of your heart, the intense smell of your blood that, despite being well protected by your veins, only urges him back…

‘Let me show you how it is for me,’ he whispers, as your foreheads touch. ‘Because, darling, I assure you, you are far from reality.’

You feel like you're in a dream, made up of fragments. The moonlight is much brighter to his sight, and the sounds of nature amplified. He pulls you onto the beach, kissing you. You feel his tongue exploring you, the warmth pleasantly welcoming his body.

He inhales your scent and you feel like it smells like flowers, even though you have never sensed anything like it. ‘A rich bouquet, which I never tire of.’

He runs down your neck, kissing it languidly and licking it. ‘I can't get enough of you, and I'm not just talking about your blood.’

His teeth find your nipples; your brain is split between the pleasure you feel yourself, and his one when he sucks and nibbles on the turgid tips. He sinks his face between your soft, generous, warm breasts, and inevitably can't help himself, bringing a hand to his erection. You feel the exquisite liquid warmth work its way into both of your bellies, his breathing shuddering as he squeezes his cock and thrusts his pelvis into his fist. You feel how excited he is to see you at his mercy, lying on the sand, eyes glazed over and heart on the verge of bursting.

The thought makes you suddenly tighten your legs, partly out of shyness, partly to fill the void, seeking a gentle friction. ‘A-astarion, I will hurt you…’

The elf laughs, and pulls you to him with supernatural strength. ‘My dear, I am a vampire. It takes more than that to hurt me,’ he replies with a grin on his face, taking you by the hips until he finds his nose peeping against your clit. He wastes no more time, pushing you down, impaling you with his tongue unceremoniously.

You pant and tremble, feeling your taste on his tongue through the connection, his fervid excitement growing and growing.

He really can't get enough of you, if he could he would become one with you from how insane his desire is. He licks you, tongue-fucking you, until you begin to unleash yourself. You grab his hair and push your pussy against his mouth, riding him.

‘That's it, my dear. Take control, fuck yourself with my tongue,’ you hear in your mind. ‘Be glorious while you do it, give me all of yourself.’

And so you do. You let yourself go, drunk with your own and Astarion's excitement. You see the scene from his eyes: the moist glistening of your clit, swollen and ready to climax, breasts dancing with every movement.

‘Fuck Astarion, I want you,’ you gasp. Reluctantly, you pull away from him for a moment, but only to turn around. You take his long, pale cock in your mouth and he returns to licking you greedily. You take him all the way down your throat, moaning, feeling the salty taste on your tongue and at the same time the sweet taste on you. Only wet sounds and moans can be heard, as you fuck each other. Your heart has never raced so fast, full of a new pride.

Astarion truly sees you as a divinity, the emblem of the very life he so dearly misses.

You are so wet that you feel Astarion swallowing several times, drinking your pleasure like wine, until he gives an arrow-accurate lapping on your pearl, making you see stars. Your mouth is still full of his cock so you can't scream as he continues to tongue fuck you as you come again, again and again.

Then, he grabs you by the hips and slams you down, entering you with disarming ease. You feel your mind fall apart but at the same time you see you beneath him, his hands encircling your red cheeks. ‘You are… so beautiful that you make me feel alive.’

His strokes become more and more imprecise, so wet you can feel that liquid pleasure inside you. ‘Gods, fuck, I'm going to cum. I want to come inside you,' he begs. ‘Pretty please.’

You whisper a ‘yes’, holding him to you as he moans your name. You feel his seed fill you and at the same time you feel his orgasm as if it were your own. You kiss him again, again and again, until your pleasure swarms.

‘Please look at yourself every day in the mirror as if you were doing it with my eyes. And if you can't, I will help you, day after day.’

You smile, as you believe in yourself a little more.

[cosmicconversations]

Astrology Lesson of the Week: The 8th House

Welcome back to the Astrology Lesson of the Week here on my blog. I have been going backwards through the houses, week by week, to explore each of them in-depth and help you understand them better.

This week, we are tackling the 8th House!

The 8th House is kind of like the 12th in a few ways. One of those ways is the notorious reputation it has. It is seen as the “spooky” house where all things traumatic and dark and death-related roam. I should just say one thing about that. Any astrologer who tries to predict your death or talk about you dying in any way by analyzing your 8th House is unethical. Yes, those kinds of astrologers do exist but they tend to be very “doom and gloom” to begin with. You actually can often assess the circumstances of someone’s death through the sign and/or planets in the 8th. People can pass away when there is a major transit in their 8th. But, it is not up to anyone to declare that in a reading.

Don’t get freaked out about that because it may not be your death. It could be someone else’s passing, which is not necessarily easier. Yet, no one may actually die when you have a transit through the 8th. The “death” here can be metaphorical. So, you may experience a loss in resources or status or go through intense situations that result in a personal death and rebirth of sorts. This can be jarring to those who maybe have an empty 8th House. Empty houses still affect you, especially when transits are passing through them. A strong transit through your 8th can intensify circumstances in your life and cause you to endure trials or tribulations that leave you forever changed.

However, this is business as usual for most people with planets in their 8th House. With my Venus and Lilith here, I have gone through so many cycles of transformation. The crises or confrontations that serve as a catalyst for this transformation can seem terrifying, as scary as death itself. Death has a few different meanings, as I have said, and we all have some sort of subconscious understanding of that. So, anything that is uncomfortable on an emotional level can feel like it is going to “kill” us. And people use that kind of language a lot in a metaphorical way. But, death (the literal and metaphorical kind) is really just transformation. It is all a matter of how you perceive that kind of change and how much you are capable of letting go or surrendering to face it. Pluto, the natural ruler of this house, can decimate whatever is in its path but also make way for something new to thrive.

8th House people make for survivors and resilient powerhouses. Most individuals with this chart influence know this from experience, from life throwing them into the deep end and forcing them to sink or swim. Some of them may spend much of their lives unscathed until a particularly traumatic event or time period really shakes them up. This is not the most pleasant stuff, to put it lightly. For starters, a lot of 8th House individuals have major childhood trauma and pain. I am not saying all of them. But, it is very common. Various forms of abuse or the early loss of a loved one or living in tough conditions can instill a profound inner wound. Yet, those with an occupied 8th House have the chance to become supreme healers. This healing power is shaman-like, as shamans have to endure incredible pain as an initiation before they acquire their healing abilities. Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that you deserved to have bad things happen to you. What I am saying is that you have the special ability to take those painful things and alchemize them into emotional gold: deep wisdom, insight, strength, empowerment, empathy for others, and the power to be an example of surviving the darkness.

However, there are some 8th House people who don’t answer this call. They may allow themselves to repeat the cycle that was passed down to them or ignore their emotional pain because it is too scary and overwhelming. This is when you see these people turn into the “monster” they once feared at an early age or just psychologically shut down altogether. The type of 8th House person unwilling to deeply investigate and work on themselves is going to live an empty and frustrating existence. They may not even be able to articulate what they feel so defeated by or what they are running from. But, it’s like when a child (or even adult) doesn’t want to clean their room so they keep throwing their dirty clothes in the closet. And the closet is eventually so stuffed with clothes that they don’t want to open it because it will just make a huge mess.

I always say that if you don’t deal with your issues, eventually, they will deal with you. And this is true of anyone, whether you just have a sign on your 8th House cusp or planets here. This is where we deal with our psychological issues. Well, some people do. Some people go to great lengths to avoid them. Going to therapy or doing some heavy-duty journaling is 8th House territory, as well as shadow work, in general. Whatever is in your 8th House is something that has been scarred and needs to have its pain tended to. No one goes through life totally unscathed. Even if you have a generally happy childhood, adulthood can still be full of horrors like toxic/abusive relationships or personal betrayals or grief over loved ones. As unpleasant as it is, this is the underbelly of life that we can’t ignore, even if you have the impulse to stay in denial or run away.

So, because of how intense and unnerving this house is, I have often seen people try to say that sex isn’t the domain of the 8th House and that it is truly the pleasure-filled 5th House that rules sex. Well, the truth is that they are both concerned with sex. And I feel like anyone who tries to deny the sexual element of the 8th must not have planets here. While the 5th House is simply the fun side of sex, the act is emotionally charged and complex in the 8th. This is where people “make love” instead of just screwing. It is about intimacy, not just physically getting off. No matter what their sexual lifestyle or relationship status is, 8th House individuals tend to prefer deep connection when they’re having sex. They may go through periods of casual sex but there is nothing like that true intimacy for them. Even while being more casual, they could easily get “hooked” on certain people if the connection is electric.

When there is a spiritual dimension to this, there can be an intense soul merge between the two people or even a transcendence to another plane of consciousness. Yeah, it’s that intense. There can also be deep sexual healing that takes place, either because they’re with the right person or because they are the right one for someone. Unfortunately, a lot of 8th House people have sexual trauma, too. There can be a scary and dark side to sex, as well. Being a survivor of sexual abuse or sexual assault is sadly common among those with 8th House planets. Also, it may have been a matter of being sexualized too early. 8th House people, when growing up, too often experience sexual harassment or objectification from adults or may have even been sexually involved with someone much older. Ultimately, it can all leave a scar that makes it tricky for the person to navigate and express their sexuality.

Even with an empty 8th House, this is something you could have dealt with. Sex is something that is abused or used against people, especially more vulnerable individuals, far too often in the world. In addition to that, there is also a great deal of sex-negativity in the world: judgment and shame and fear when it comes to something so natural. So, this area of the chart is also where we can learn sex-positivity and how to fully embrace our sexual side without fear or guilt. This can be the house of sexual repression or sexual liberation. People can be slut-shamed here or even feel compelled to hide any non-hetero desires. And it is also a place where we may have been taught to fear our sexual self because it was targeted or abused or activated too early. The journey of healing that shame is deeply personal and may take time. And healing never truly ends. But, in the 8th, you have the opportunity to gradually see your sexual nature as a form of power to be appreciated and embraced, not hidden away or denied.

Extended Portion of Astrology Lesson of the Week (8th House) (how this house represents our inner power and inner shadow, our relation to magic/the occult and connection to the afterlife)

[aslitheryprinx]

I wish that I were a streamer, bc what just happened to me is SO insane.

So despite having played Minecraft for years I've never actually beaten the game on a survival world. I always get distracted and end up creating a new world before I actually get to that point. Earlier today, I decided to log onto a slightly older world (like a year or so, not very old, but it's been a bit) since I'd already progressed pretty far.

I gather all my stuff and start hunting down the stronghold. It takes a bit, especially cause I'm not super practiced at this, but I find it! I also happen to find a bunch of old stuff from when I apparently died trying to find the stronghold ages ago- that was a nice surprise!

You know what wasn't a nice surprise??

The stronghold sitting snug up against the deep dark.

Honestly, at first I think it's pretty cool. It's the first time I've actually seen the deep dark in person, so I'm more intrigued than anything else.

I set my spawn, and start looking for the portal room.

I open a single door and hear a shrieker go off.

Darkness starts pulsing.

Right about then is when I start thinking 'ok this might be a Problem!!!'

I'm hoping the shrieker or catalyst or whatever it is that actually spawns the warden is outside the door, so I press my luck and go forward. I end up setting it off again, so I retreat to try and figure out my next move.

I'm wondering if I should just abandon this stronghold and find a new one, but that would be a pretty long journey. If I can just get rid of the catalyst, I should be set to explore the stronghold.

I leave the actual stronghold itself and start carefully going around looking for where the problem spot is, but I can't actually see anything important except for a diamond. I crouch the whole way, grab it, and come back to the top.

And then. A zombie villager sneaks up behind me and knocks me off into the deep dark.

I land on the catalyst, setting a shrieker off again of course.

Now, I wasn't sure how many times you could set the warden off. I thought it ran on a 3 strikes you're out system, so I am PANICKING.

I try to break the catalyst.

The catalyst is also under a water stream so I'm splashing around the whole time and. Of course. I set off a shrieker again.

The Warden spawns.

Somehow, I manage to swim back up the water stream without dying. I turn around. The Warden is about six blocks away.

It is at this point that I just fully pause the game to contemplate my fate.

Maybe I should've logged out at that point, to lose that aggro on myself. But I didn't think about that.

I was incredibly certain I was about to die, and having just gained back a ton of stuff that I'd been devastated by losing in the first place, (enough that I had kind of lost interest in this world originally), I decided that making sure I didn't lose any of my stuff was the priority.

And my spawn point was basically right there...

I dropped back into the stronghold and was almost immediately killed by the Warden. But when I respawned, I could see my stuff all right there, still safe.

New problem: the Warden had dropped down and was also right in front of my spawn point.

And thus begins my death loop.

I put all of my stuff save my sword in a chest- which didn't help the warden being mad at me- and decided to try and brute force kill this thing through multiple deaths.

But by the time I had everything situated, the warden had sort of disappeared.

It was still there. It was shooting me with sonic blasts and killing me over and over again. But I couldn't actually see it, so I couldn't kill it.

It was at this point that I decided to log out, get a snack, and come back with a clearer head afterwards.

I don't know if wardens despawn. I don't know if it's going to be there when I come back. But I'm in too deep now, I am going to find the portal room of this Stronghold if I have to kill the Warden with my bare fists to do it!!!!!

[sixhours]

Pedro Scouts & Camp: Week ??

Y'all I have so many badges to catch up on! I'm gonna work on that this week 'cause I'm on vacation.

Rainbow Tye Dye & Songfic

I posted the first three chapters of i know you by heart, my queer TLOU/Prospect crossover fic, the title of which is based on the song by Eva Cassidy, and there's a lot of references to her album Songbird in there, so I'm calling this a double.

Got Silly in the Tags

I'm pretty much always silly in the tags. 🫠

Dieter Bravo

I started reading 2 Sweet 4 Me by @eff4freddie, a sad-ish cute fic about our favorite hot mess.

RomCom

@wrathkitty's amazing Short Debts Make Long Friends has a new chapter out and it's a goooooood one!

Awakened a Kink

Okay, so I don't have a Daddy kink (even if my sweet husband made a really off-color joke about it during our Father's Day family dinner this weekend *ahem* *serious side eye*) BUT I am all about the Catalyst-verse by @ezrasbirdie and the new chapter was so so good I could...maybe...see it...*cough*

Darkfic

Phew, this one goes to Ninety-Nine Days another Dieter fic by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin that sobered me up right quick.

Max Phillips

This reminded me I need to rewatch Bloodsucking Bastards, it's really pretty funny. I picked @oonajaeadira's Light Only Shows You Where the Shadows Are fic for this.

Googled a Term

I'm claiming this one retroactively because I had to figure out what a ficlet was for my ficlet badge.

Saddle Up!

Sheep Ranch on the Moon by TomeoftheForgotten on AO3 is an adorable ranch Joel & Ellie AU with plenty of rodeo shenanigans!

I Got Wet At Camp

Swimming Lessons by @inherstars is probably my favorite Ellie-learns-to-swim fic so far.

[j-digo]

I am You, You are Me

By Dejanae Gibson

I am You. You are Me. We are no different.

For many lifetimes, we were two halves of a whole, mirroring the same unseen hopes, dreams, desires, torments, and hurt. It was empathy and compassion that enjoined us. Our love was the warmth that glued us together for eternity.

To witness my duality — the multifaceted, complicated nature of my personhood — in you is a blessing. It was as if we found ourselves in each other’s eyes. I am You. You are Me.

My depth and (w)holiness blossomed in moments of resonance with you. We shared laughter, joy, anger, sadness, hopelessness, and love. We shared secrets, knowledge, food, prayer, song and dance. We swayed back and forth between the polarities of our existence, experiencing the dichotomy that is life. I felt tethered to you. Your presence echoed something within me.

You balance me like the Sun and the Moon. As we swim in pools of love, languishing in the space that orbits around us, we see all the possibilities of our being yet to be explored. You remind me that I can be whoever I choose in this spectrum of life.

Good and Evil. Masculine and Feminine. Beautiful and Vile. Luminous and Somber. Full and Empty. Loving and Hateful. Still and Moving. Superior and Inferior. Mind and Body.

Ego and Soul. Alpha and Omega. Ying and Yang.

I am You. You are Me. We are two halves of a whole, magnetized centuries ago. We are One.

You hold the spaces I can’t seem to occupy within myself, awakening something Divine in me. You scorch Earth that I have yet to conquer. I am the soothing balm in your time of angst. You see the power of my deliverance. I push you to look within.

We merge into each other, tangoing and wrestling with the weight of each other's presence. We are consumed. Blinded, like a moth to a flame. We are the catalysts of our undoing. My Anchor. Your Morning Star. My Wellspring. Your Vessel. My Light. Your Darkness. Our Salvation. Our Rebirth.

Above and below, we are a part of each other. Full and abundant in all God’s glory.

As our fire burns and we breathe in anew, I grasp a deeper truth. We are nothing without the virtues that ground us — the warmth and agape love that sustains us.

We are nothing without our personhood and our Oneness. Though you are me, and I am you — devoted to each other for lifetimes — we must stand in our singularity and not be led astray by the fervor in our pursuits for existence. We must not destroy each other or give until there is nothing left. We must remember that we are bright stars shining harmoniously. We must love ourselves as we love the World — together in our own unique and selfless way.

This is my commandment to you.

I am You. You are Me. Soul to Soul. Let’s be good to each other.

[theseasonthatchangedmylife]

The Summer that Changed My Life

In the approaching days, I’d have the freedom to steer away whenever faced with such predicament, sparing myself from degradation, shedding the pursuit of validation from those who turn a deaf ear. The car keys become a ticket to escape.

I was 17s summer old when I joined a summer camp called Lakegreen. It was an insistence of my mother. It was strange that my humble mother urged me towards this camp. Of course, my old man had no say in the matter since he was gone as the per usual. Strikingly, the decision was solely hers. I was not against the idea; in fact, I was excited to be away from the city to enjoy observing the skies. The allure of escaping city lights to bask in the beauty of stars captivated me.

 As a kid I wanted to major in Astronomy because it was a career where I thought I could go 'higher than dad'. However now it is just a hobby. Camp Lakegreen, a resort in a wooded landscape hugging a serene lake. The water, calm and glass clear by day, tranquil under the noonday sun,  peaceful navy hue at night. The air was warm and dry, embraced by a nocturnal breeze.

A myriad of activities awaited us—canoeing, hiking, swimming, scavenger hunts, and indoor pursuits like poetry contests, arts and crafts, and tie-dye.

Amidst the joys, my friendship blossomed with Amy, a shy, fair-haired girl. Assigned partners by the counselor who oversaw our cabin, Peter, who also overlooked the futility of pairing two introverts. h-hello my name is Jane! ”…… hi”, said Amy

Our conversation was almost as scarce as the class O star. Our cabin housed two other girls from my school, with whom I was not fond of. Particularly Nevada—a proud snob, a year my junior. Amy’s aversion to Nevada became the catalyst for our growing closeness, a classic ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend’ scenario.

On the second day, I signed for a poetry contest themed on summer. Despite my appreciation for outdoor sports, my heart found solace in stillness. I spent a day in my bunk bed writing a poem:

The Observing Season

When toes sink in the golden dust

And the blue seas wash it away

It is the time for the long rest

It is the time of the day

The new thrives and the old may rust

It is the time at the end of May

Lounger out for observing hours

Amateurs pack up tools to scour

"Shorter nights", they say to cower

Well, the warmer nights have the meteor shower

Time passed so fast, as nightfall arrived unnoticed. Eager to gather inspiration for the poem under the stars, I ventured outside my cabin into the woods.

Amy, just returning to the room, proposed a lakeside stroll. We got closer to the lake and took pictures with our phones there. The further we got away from the lake into the woods the warmer and slightly dry it got, but the strong breeze was comforting. Everything seemed fine until we saw Nevada and her friend smoking in secret. The second they got a glimpse of us, they threw the cigarettes away and fled the scene. While Amy and I were laughing at the sight of the mighty Nevada being scared, the cigarettes' butts started a flame which grew bigger despite our attempts to stop it.

'LET'S JUST RUN AWAY', said Amy. Let’s go before the counselor sees us!'

I shouted: 'Are you insane? I am not leaving until I put the fire out!'

'I am sorry I... I can't stay here any longer!'

Amy left, and I couldn’t quell the fire. Peter, armed with a fire extinguisher, arrived, averting a catastrophe. The next day,

the kids’ stared at me accusingly, and the administrators summoned me.

‘It was not me!’ I protested.

‘Jane, we don’t want to make this uncomfortable. You were the only one there,’ said Peter.

‘No, I was the only one who cared to stay!’

The administrator who cleared his throat loudly said: 'regardless of what you say, we thought it was the best to call your guardian over'

'What? I am telling you it wasn't me and if you ask Amy who was with m-'

 'ENOUGH', screamed the administrator.

'The fire could have led to a serious tragedy had we not handled the situation fast', he continued: 'The parents are worried that there is an arsonist in the camp over rumors'

 Tearfully, I defended my innocence, but my pleas fell on deaf ears.

 ‘Grab your things before your parents arrive,’ Peter declared.

"Parents?" it is only my concerned mom I bet.

Hours later, my mother arrived. Attempts to explain my innocence were overshadowed by her apologies to the administrators. I couldn't stand the sight of my mother humiliating herself like that. And for something I didn't do! It would have been better if I did it for real at that point. The car ride was stifled. I couldn’t stay silent, so I let it out:

‘Let me explain…I saw Nevada smoking then-‘

'I know my daughter wouldn't do such a thing... I have heard you the first time', mother said.

Her understanding helped calm the rage within me. Nevada, Amy, and the camp were forgiven in that moment.

Months later, my mother’s health deteriorated. She was diagnosed with cancer, she started taking chemotherapy, but it was not effective. Attempts at treatment proved futile. Eventually she was put in palliative care few weeks before she died.

My mother was aware of her condition long before my father and I, but she chose not to let us know. I couldn't stop thinking that she sent me to the camp so she can go through with the therapy in secret. “If only I ran with Amy that day instead of trying to be the hero mom wouldn’t have died” was the thought I couldn’t shake. I was not the same person anymore. That summer had changed me.

Next

[axewchao]

I know the common consensus for a human/gijinka Lud is either mad scientist getup (aka Kooky), sweater vests, waistcoats, orchestral conductor tailcoats, or jabots/cravats. And as much as I wanna draw him in any of those outfits, I also want my version of this dude to stand out in some way among the others.

Solution? Draw his casual attire first. Let's say any of the above options are for when he has to dress up for something important, like meetings, galas, holiday parties, battling the Mario Bros., etc.

In truth, Ludwig heavily dislikes dressing up, mostly because it reminds him of his prior life as an aristocrat before ending up at Bowser's Castle. And while he's technically risen even higher in status by becoming an unofficial Prince, he'd still much rather walk around in more comfortable clothes until dolling himself up becomes mandatory.

And since I'm still in a headcanon-y mood, here's some extra tidbits under the readmore:

Using magic without a catalyst of some kind (a wand, a book, etc.) is incredibly difficult for most beings. While Ludwig is the best magic user among the Koopalings (who already possess great skill on their own), he still struggles with using magic without his wand, and all his attempts to do so end up leaving him exhausted.

He has bits of stubble because he's debating on whether or not he should grow a goatee, or even a full beard. Sometimes he shaves it off. And no, I'm not making excuses for when I forget to draw it on.

As you've seen in other pics, Ludwig can set his hair on fire when he's agitated, and has been able to do this since he was very young. It doesn't hurt him at all.

Unless, of course, he's overheating, which is a whole other can of worms.

He avoids touching Fire Flowers and food or drinks with Fire Flowers in them because that runs the risk of overheat.

He doesn't know how to swim.

He is the only one of the Koopalings who still calls Bowser "Lord Bowser." While he does view Bowser as the father he wished he had growing up, he's still afraid to outright say it.

By extension, he's afraid to verbally address the other Koopalings as family (except Lemmy because they're cousins). He isn't sure how to ask them "What am I to you?" without making it awkward or humiliating.

Tldr; his upbringing left him somewhat neurotic because his parents heavily emphasized the importance of how you're viewed by others.

As a Koopa, he has a crooked tail. It's fairly common for Koopas to hatch with or develop slightly bent tails, and while it can be corrected, it's not a necessary procedure.

The bent tail is a reference to Kooky Von Koopa. ;3c

Lemmy also hatched with a crooked tail, but got his corrected. Ludwig claims that he didn't get his fixed because he was already used to it, but in reality he was scared of the procedure. His parents were going to force him to get it fixed but eventually gave up after Ludwig nearly burned the house down in a panicked fit. Several times.

[octahedral-chaos]

Some more Binary Stars' Impact stuff! Especially sillier stuff.

@arandompeep I am also tagging you here if that's okay.

Due to Edda's inability to swim. It immediately switch to any other character in the party... but Edda doesn't die. Aven, however, can swim... and can even use physical attacks under water WITHOUT the gadget (I forgot the name of it). It's much weaker though.

Edda is very, VERY good at Genius Invokation TCG. I think Aven and Edda would both have character cards... as well as Summum and Angel (coming back to this one).

They would probably be very protective of Nahida, Furina and maybe even Venti because they all seem to be young and both of them basically went into parent mode (tm). Lay a finger on any of them and you'll get a LOT of pryo/cryo/anemo/electro damage.

Aven would be fascinated with Lyney and Lynette's magic show... he even know some magic tricks of his own!

Turns out Angel is still alive... and the entire crew only realised this when they popped in OUT OF NOWHERE to fight a random Pryo regisvine. They, however, got the everloving daylights beaten out of them by said flower.

Everyone wonder what is up about Edda and Aven's "disappearing body" thing, so someone attempt to poke their arm through Aven's torso while he was reading... it didn't go well.

Aven is a catalyst btw, while Edda might be sword or bow? Not too sure, but I'm leaning more towards the sword. Angel might be polearm.

Aven's upclose attacks are obviously slashing with his claws and kicking. He also does a cartwheel, and I could imagine if he was actually in-game, everyone who be memeing that VERY hard (Also Edda's upside-down midair bow shot... but she's in an entirely different class, so to speak).

Aven would either have a love or hate relationship with Wanderer (I should say platonically, since I do headcanon Aven to be aroace).

Edda's ability to sprint on water naturally gets Furina's attention. Cue these two chasing each other while Aven and Neuvillette just stares at each other with the most "Why?" expression.

[soldier-requests]

https://www.tumblr.com/soldier-requests/742779174051364864/hello-can-i-ask-for-a-playlist-for-a?source=share

hello, sorry for not specifying. nothing from a certain media, the kintype in general. but if a character can help with it, something like Barbatos from obey me!, but I don't kin him. he isn't stated as a realitywarper anyway-

and about songs.. things like Six Forty Seven by insupendo ; Solitude from Candlemass and Vermillion by Slipknot?

thank you for your hardwork :). [please tag @orderling when you're done.]

hello!! okay i gotcha now, thanks for clarifying; hopefully you like whatever i ended up finding ^_^.

and thank you! i appreciate the compliment :]].

(@orderling)

under a cut because this one's pretty long XD.

songs go like "song" + "artist"

dividers from @/just-my-latest-hyperfixation and @/baexywth

"Falling" + "Instupendo"

"128" + "machingum"

"This Could Build Us a Home" + "The Garden"

"Where Is My Mind" + "Safari Riot" and "Grayson Sanders"

"Vanished" + "Crystal Castles"

"Suffer With Me" + "líue"

"LOVELY BASTARDS" + "ZWE1HVNDXR" and "yatashigang"

"Catalysts for Her Awakening" + "Avith Ortega"

"Insidious" + "joseph bishara"

"The Sound Of Your Fear" + "Midi Blossom"

"Key" + "C418"

"It's Playtime" + "MOB Games"

"Browser History" + "Graham Kartna"

"A Burning Memory" + "Reece Moseley"

"warm nights" + "Xori"

"Lavender Town" + "8-Bit Arcade"

"Lavender Town" + "Bitmaster"

"you not the same" + "TileKid"

"Judah's Lullaby" + "REPULSIVE"

"Kyomi's Lullaby" + "REPULSIVE"

"バラック集落" (In English: "Barrack Settlements" or "Barracks") + "Kikiyama"

"PP1" + "Frakkur"

"Deep Swim" + "Windows 96"

"Sony" + "VHS LOGOS"

"Implanted Memories" + "Infinity Frequencies"

"The descent" + "Infinity Frequencies"

"Agony" (Instrumental) + "Scammacist"

"Echoes of Tranquility" + "Nocturne"

"Stars Will Fall" + "Duster"

"Choking on Flowers" + "Fox Academy"

"Dust Collector" + "YG Hypnos"

"Memoir #02 [06.12.09]" + "Maria Pseftoga" and "May Roosevelt"

"The Lobotomy" + "Maebi"

"Year Zero" + "Ghost"

"Con Clavi Con Dio" + "Ghost"

"Prime Mover" + "Ghost"

"Call Me Little Sunshine" + "Ghost"

"The Killer in My Skull" + "Alastor"

"I'll Cut You Down" + "Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats"

"Them!" + "Acid Mammoth"

"Strong Reflection" + "Mars Red Sky"

"Prehistoric Dog" + "Red Fang"

"The Culling" + "Chelsea Wolfe"

"Christ is Dead" + "Crypt Sermon"

"Beneath the Torchfire Glare" + "Crypt Sermon"

"Mare of the Night" + "Below"

"The Coven" + "Below"

"Seeds of the Desolate" + "Solitude Aeturnus"

"Fallen Empire" + "Dawn Of Winter"

"Ragnaradi Eve" + "Scald"

"In the Open Sea" + "Scald"

"Black Colossus" + "Funeral Circle"

"Scion of Infinity" + "Funeral Circle"

"Spiritus Mortis" + "I Am a Name on Your Funeral Wreath"

"Lost Horizons" + "Memento Mori"

"The Sword Woman" + "Smoulder"

"The Poltergeist" + "Count Raven"

"Beyond the Horizon" + "Isole"

"Among the Exalted" + "Godthrymm"

"Wolf God" + "Grand Magus"

"Here Be Monsters" + "Apocalypse Orchestra"

"Bring Me To Life" + "Evanescence"

"Break Stuff" + "Limp Bizkit"

"Bodies" + "Drowning Pool"

"Down with the Sickness" + "Disturbed"

"Yuve Yuve Yu" + "The HU"

"Up to the Flames" + "Ludovico Technique"

"Framed In Blood" (Remastered 2006) + "The 69 Eyes"

"Heavy Lies The Crown" + "In Fear And Faith"

"Last Man Stranded" + "In Fear And Faith"

"A Fire On A Hill" + "Hands Like Houses"

"Let Me In" + "Dead Silence Hides My Cries"

"Murder Mitten" + "I See Stars"

"Melancholia" + "Dark Sarah"

"Every Little Thing" + "Dishwalla"

"The Air-Conditioned Nightmare" + "Mr. Bungle"

"The Diary Of Jane" + "Breaking Benjamin"

"Truth" + "Seether"

"Woohoo" + "Fleshwater"

"Waking the Demon" + "Bullet For My Valentine"

"Orchid" (Remastered 2014) + "Black Sabbath"

"Neon Knights" (Remastered 2008) + "Black Sabbath"

"Holy Diver" + "Dio"

"Rainbow in the Dark" + "Dio"

"Anesthesia" + "Type O Negative"

"Nettie" + "Type O Negative"

"Love You to Death" + "Type O Negative"

"Haunted" (Per Version) + "Type O Negative"

"Rev 22-20" + "Puscifer"

"Dragonaut" + "Sleep"

[soralinklokidottirofmirkwood]

Little troublemaker: Big sister Klee x toddler little sister reader.

Age:2 Reader Chan is Klee's baby sister she is like her mother and big sister with the same love for explosions. Klee is her guardian while Their parents are away. I have seen many Klee x big sister reader fanfics so I decided to make Klee the big sister.

Two years ago:

Alice can be heard screaming in the delivery room while her husband sat outside with their 8 year old daughter Klee who looks worried for her mother "Daddy is Mommy going to be ok?" The young elf asked her father who smiles down at her and ruffles the child's ash blonde hair "Of course she'll be fine dear. Remember Mommy is a strong adventurer." He told Klee looking at her innocent red eyes making her smile in comfort "You two may go in now." A nurse gently said gesturing to the delivery room. Alice was sitting on the bed cradling a little bundle wrapped in a red blanket with a four leaf clover on it.

Klee made her way to her mother who gently smiled at her "Klee meet your new little sister Y/N." She said showing the eight year old elf the baby who looked just like her and her mother. She has the same ruby red eyes, ash blond hair and pointy ears as them but she also has a four leaf clover birth mark on her little wrist "She's so cute Mommy." Klee said as quietly as she can not wanting to scare the newborn who looked at her in curiosity "Would you like to hold her Klee?" Alice asked her daughter who nodded excitedly.

Klee sat on a wooden chair while her father took you from your mothers arms. He showed Klee how to hold you so she wouldn't drop you and to make sure your comfortable "Hello Y/N I am your big sister Klee. When your older I'm gonna teach you how to use Dodoco, make and use bombs and show you how to use a catalyst." Klee said excitedly as Alice and her husband looked lovingly at their girls but the nights of Favonius were dreading  when that day comes.

End of flashback:

Klee is walking to the Favonius daycare to pick you up after she completed her commissions for the day and talked to Katherine. She is at the front desk talking to the nice lady "Ahh welcome Klee. are you here to pick up Y/N?" She asked the young elf "Yes Klee is here to pick up Y/N." She said happily "Alright go on In but quietly some of the babies are still sleeping!" She said as Klee quietly walked in to see you and a few other kids playing with stuffed animals "Y/N look who's here." Your teacher said making you look up and smile "Sissy, Sissy, sissy." You said happily waddling to your big sister who smiled back and said "Big sister Klee is here Firefly." Klee said calling you by her nickname for you as she picked you up from the ground earning a squeal from you and grabbed your diaper bag "Bye bye everyone." Klee said walking out with you in her arms. As your both in town square Klee walks to the good hunter to buy food "Hi Mrs Sarah two meat and mushroom skewers please." She said giving the right amount of Mora "Of course girls." She said as Sarah is preparing the skewers she asked Klee how her commissions went as they talked they are unaware that you managed to open up Klee's backpack and grabbed a bomb. You looked at it curiously thinking it was a ball you wanted to see if it will bounce but the skewers were done and Klee walked out of the city carrying you in her arms walking to cider lake. As you two are sitting on the shore she's eating her skewer while you see a school of fish swimming around making you squeal in excitement while playing with the bomb. You happily rolled it but as you did it rolled towards the lake and when it landed on the surface 'BOOM' the fish were sushi.

Klee was in shock when she saw that you got a jumpty dumpty bomb from her bag and blew up fish "Jean's going to kill me." She said fearfully looking around "Well it's never to early to go to Liyue. Come on Y/N." She said picking you up and start sprinting in the direction of the dawn winery.

Jean was sitting in her office doing paperwork but stopped at the sound of an explosion near cider lake. Sighing and placing her head in her hand she whispered "What am I going to do with those little troublemakers?" She asked herself unaware that the two girls along with a feline pink haired girl fled to Liyue and made friends with a purple haired young zombie.

It’s my first year anniversary.

[thatblastedpen]

My ER journey. A parched tale.

I recently was in the ER FOR TWELVE HOURS, nobody gave me water.

Now, I'm not pointing fingers at nurses or anyone there. This isn't going to be a knock on the people, because it was freaking insane in there. They were understaffed and probably pulling their hair out. But it became this hilarious thing in hindsight but also psychological torture session. Follow me on this journey.

Friday morning, I woke up and stretched like you normally would and my hip fucking exploded.

My leg goes numb, I long for a merciful death and we call the ambulance. The pain is immense.

So I get to the ER at about 11 am. Apparently everyone in my city also decided to f*** their sh** right up at the same time I did. It was chaos and I was wheeled to a hallway. I want to point out that because of the nature of the injury, I couldn't move from my position. I was stuck on my back, flat, and couldn't even turn over. Nerves are dumb.

So there I lay for....oh, hours. I had one nurse come by and half-heartedly try to put in an IV. She does not succeed. She leaves and promises someone else will try. Remember that.

Hours go by. I mean hours. I lay there until nearly 4 pm and I just...I have to pee. Which is amazing because I had no food or water at all but my kidneys were working juuust fine. After trying to flag down several people, I finally get one by saying "I have to pee!" That'll stop someone in their tracks.

Someone kindly wheels me to a private room and I..I won't go into details here. Arrangements are made. I get to pee. Somehow. Trust me. There is always a will and a way.

Either that was the catalyst to get me help or I finally was moved up in the list to be attended to. Another nurse comes in to put an IV in. I ask for water. She pokes my right arm at the wrist three PAINFUL times, then blows out the vein on my right arm. I am left with no water and no IV. Such is life.

Another hours lapses and the doc comes into check on me. She notes that I can move my legs and have some feeling. Good news, I didn't paralyze myself! So she orders meds which I take with water. Now here is where the sadism starts. THEY TAKE THE CUP AWAY FROM ME and leave. I had one delicious sip of water and then was left to my lonesome. I am thirsty.

After another hour, the doc returns and asks if I can try to sit up. The meds have started to take the edge off but I'm still hurting. I so "sure, let's go." because who wants to be in an ER? She moves the bed to sit me up, immediately my hip explodes in pain and I beg her to stop. Mercifully she does. She says she'll order me more meds and leaves me.

A new nurse arrives and I will call her the 'sassy' nurse. She gets the IV in in one go after making a pointed comment that is wasn't that hard and that I should have had one hours ago. Ha. She then gives me morphine. Holee sheet. I started taking selfie pics with my pee receptacle. I peed a lot.

Guess what morphine doesn't cure? THE UNENDING THIRST. I ask for water again, I get a half-hearted "we'll check with the doc" and I never see water again for hours.

After fuzzy time, because it's morphine, I'm moved to the hallway before moved to another, better room to recover in. Another nurse checks on me and gives me another round of meds (likely muscle relaxers and steroids?) with a tiny cup of water. Omg water. Precious water. Then, THIS SADIST PUTS THE CUP ON THE TABLE ACROSS THE ROOM FROM ME.

I'm left alone to let the meds work and swim in the numb euphoria of morphine. Except I'm in pain, I'm thirsty, and peeing is super weird and vaguely embarrassing. Doc comes back, I chat about that pop I heard and my worries. She gives me the deets, assures me that I will be in pain but on my feet and mobile. We just got to get me there. Oh, I'm determined. My same nurse arrives to help me sit up, which I'm gung-ho to try for. I ask for water or a gaterade or a ginger ale. I'm given neither.

Is it a conspiracy at this point??

Finally, after ANOTHER DOSE of morphine, I am sitting up (even if my head keeps falling back. Look...morphine is hard to move in.) But I'm determined. I'm going to get out of bed and get that tiny cup of water nearby. While snail crawling out of bed, another nurse arrives and asks if I'm ready to get up. You betcha! We do, and I remember that I'm in just a t-shirt and undies. It was morning when this happened, after all. She suggests a robe. I say "yeah, probably a good idea." But really I don't give a crap. I want that water.

While she grabs the robe, I lunge to the table and down the remains of the water (probably a sip worth) like it's life giving mana. She returns and we walk about the halls and I find a bathroom and go potty like a big girl!

So here is where two hilarious things occur to me: one-morphine doesn't really stop the pain. It just makes you so numb you don't really feel it. Like a blanket on the brain. And two-I'm RIGHT ACROSS FROM A DRINK STATION WITH ALL THE GINGERALE, SODA, AND WATER I COULD EVER ASK FOR. IT WAS RIGHT THERE TEN FEET FROM ME. ARE YOU KIDDING?

Anyway, after that, I call my dad to come pick me up and to bring a change of clothes. God bless this man, he arrives and calls to say "I'm out front waiting on you." "Dad...I'm in my underware." "OH RIGHT."

And that's basically it. I shuffle out on my own, not wheeled out, and it was a long walk and I was very high on all the drugs. I think the moral of the story here is: Don't go to this particular hospital unless you are actively dying. And if you do: bring your own water.

Side note: I sobbed over McDonald’s closing before I could get there to eat. I blame the morphine.

[7ban-sama]

Ok idk if you are asking for fic recs but i am taking the opportunity, I love Two-Player King's Game by corologs on ao3!! She has other great work, too, but a lot do fall into AU/grown-up. :0c (but yes we certainly need more...)

*fondly* ah, Three-Player King's Game is actually the first JSHK fic I read, back when I was getting into the manga months ago. it is in my bookmarks. :> It's lots of fun and totally gets the "vibe" right I think, with Tsukasa being a catalyst making things happen between Amane and Nene. I love him stoking Amane's desire... and activating the possessive braincell by starting to touch Nene a bit. Ah, so tasteful. I love... when Tsukas kisses Amane as he plows Nene, literally one of my fav arrangements... 👉👈 I read this before I even came to terms with how serious my feelings were for the twins together, so I never actually crystalized them kissing in my head... I thought I'd be more into HanaNene and was just playfully willing to involve Tsukasa in things. (... and look at me now...) That kiss really sizzled m'brain...

Subsequently, I've skimmed their other work, but as you said, there's many aged-up fic which sadly makes me snzzz... College AUs... put me to sleep... but even when it's not college stuff, there's AUs just set in worlds I do not care for. Like Royalty stuff... They're a fine writer but all that stood out to me besides Three-Player King's Game is One a Ripple, the Other a Wave. A simple gen fic, of the twins going out for a swim... but very sweet, filled my chest with warm fuzzies... I haven't looked through their entire catalogue though so there might be more I like. They have written a lot so... who knows! I'm slowly meandering about.

I generally don't ask for fic recs though cuz I'm quite persnicketty and I don't want anyone to feel self-conscious about themselves based on my response. I'm a picky eater... doesn't take much to put me off a fic. I often seek refuge in writing my own material as a result. >> But ofc it's nice when a fic does please me, it's genuinely inspiring for my own writing.

[dcndrohime]

1. WHAT IS YOUR NAME?: ''Hinamori, Hina works just as well''

2. WHAT IS YOUR REAL NAME?: ''Midorichise Hinamori''

3. DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU’RE CALLED THAT?: ''Because that is what my father has chosen''

4. ARE YOU SINGLE OR TAKEN?: she would say something, even if vague but those things are in the works. (Verse dependent. Taken in Adeptus Verse)

5. WHAT ARE YOUR POWERS AND ABILITIES?: ''Well...'', her gaze shifts towards where it is that her Dendro Vision is resting; her hairpiece. ''I would rather not ramble every little thing that can be done''.

6. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?: ''Teal, somewhere around a color of the ocean''

7. HAVE YOU EVER DYED YOUR HAIR?: ''Yes. I have''.

8. DO YOU HAVE ANY FAMILY MEMBERS?: ''Yes'', and she will not elaborate further'', though, she do have someone she can call a brother.

9. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?: ''In a way...'' (Verse Dependent. Akademiya AU)

10. TELL ME ABOUT SOMETHING YOU DON’T LIKE: ''In what way?'', Hinamori can't help but wonder why such a vague inquiry presented itself. ''But well, i don't favor sour things, i suppose''.

11. DO YOU HAVE ANY HOBBIES OR ACTIVITIES YOU DO IN YOUR SPARE TIME?: ''I actually do quite alot, job aside but i'd rather not bore anybody with listing so much. Helping people is certainly something well into my spare time''.

12. HAVE YOU EVER HURT ANYONE BEFORE?: ''Umm...'', this clearly does not bring her any comfort so she will remain silent on this.

13. HAVE YOU EVER… KILLED ANYONE?: ''No''.

14. WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL ARE YOU?: ''I am dog woman'', if that wasn't any obvious.

15. NAME YOUR WORST HABITS: ''Uhhh'', this one is rather embarassing. ''My irregular sleeping problem'', moving on!.

16. DO YOU LOOK UP TO ANYONE: ''My parents above all else but i believe in the people on equal grounds''.

17. GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?: ''I am Bi, male leaning''.

18. DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL?: ''In the past, yes''. (Verse Dependent. Akademiya AU)

19. DO YOU EVER WANT TO MARRY AND HAVE KIDS SOMEDAY?: ''Thats not something on my mind'', and perhaps it never will, who can say.

20. DO YOU HAVE ANY FANS?: ''There is a fanclub''.

21. WHAT ARE YOU MOST AFRAID OF?: Ah, another sensitive question there, she supposed it is to be expected. ''I'd rather not say..''.

22. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY WEAR?: gesture at herself, at what is worn ''this''.

23. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE?: ''Indeed, i do'' (Verse Dependent. Adeptus Verse)

24. WHAT CLASS ARE YOU?: Vague questions seems to matter huh. ''Sojutsu, of the spear'', with a little of Catalyst on the side & whatnot.

25. HOW MANY FRIENDS DO YOU HAVE?: ''I have a handful, most are abroad however''

26. WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON PIE?: ''Hmm, it depends whats inside, but bitter meat pie is something i favor eating''.

27. FAVORITE DRINK?: ''Cherry tea amongst others, almond dango milk''.

29. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE?: ''Chinju Forest''.

30. ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SOMEONE?: This might be flustering Hinamori, just a little. ''Yes..'', even then, this is in the works.

31. WOULD YOU RATHER SWIM IN THE LAKE OR THE OCEAN?: ''Hm, i think a fairly sized pool of water will do better''

32. WHAT’S YOUR ‘TYPE’?: this does not yells blood type, definitely not. ''Introverted''.

33. ANY FETISHES?: ''That is not appropriate, good sir''.

35. CAMPING, OR INDOORS?: ''Eh, both, but should the situation calls for it, camping''.

36. ARE YOU WAITING FOR THIS INTERVIEW TO BE OVER?: ''If they are no more questions, sure''.

[intrulogical]

OK. so some of my favorite tmg intrulogical songs are collapsing stars and heel turn 2. collapsing stars is about escaping the miseries of your life through someone else. im OBSESSED with tihs for them because i love the idea of logan finding solace with remus and vice versa, but that solace turns into necessity and desperation. "the grim particulars of poisoning the swimming pool/well you looked me in the eye, ready to die" and "you can look/but you wont find/another love like ours" are some of my favorite lyrics for them. ALSO i think the metaphor of both of them as collapsing stars is VERY fitting for intrulogical. heel turn 2 is perhaps the better comparison to draw (though it can also be a solo logan song). it describes someone's decision to give up on their era of trying to be kind and helpful, and transform into something ruthless and angry. DEFINITELY fits logans orange idea, and i always always love Remus Making Logan Worse. i think remus would be the catalyst for logan's heel turn here. fitting/epic lyrics are: "be an upstanding well loved man," "you found my breaking point/congratulations," "come unhinged/get revenge/i don't wanna die in here." i may come back later with more things to say but for nowi must sleep

HI OMG I ONLY GOT TO READ THIS ALL NOW BUT HOLY SHIT.

remus and logan's potential relationship is SO interesting to me, and i can't help but agree w everything you mentioned!! i love the idea that they're both collapsing stare, because in a way, they are. remus is not acknowledged and logan is pushed to the sidelines. i am a SUCKER for characters finding solace in each other because they're stuck in the same situation of hurt and desperation. not in a way that romanticizes the hurt, of course, but it's the how one can recognize another person's struggles in a way other people haven't. i call it forced found family lmfao, my favorite trope

and in the actual context of sanders sides, i DO believe remus and logan are gonna feed each other's toxicity. logan is pushed to the side and the only one who doesn't criticize his orangeness would be remus. i say their relationship is very steven universe future steven and jasper. steven trains with jasper, becoming more powerful and powerful, jasper oblivious to how steven is becoming drunk with it. steven eventually breaks jasper's stone, but he heals her again anyway. while steven is broken, jasper praises his power, and it only terrifies steven more. THAT'S how i want intrulogical to pan out.

more than anything, they're hurt, making do with whatever scraps they get.

[genshinimpactlife]

Hi! Could I please get a matchup? There's absolutely no rush or pressure at all though! I totally understand if you're too busy or just not in the mood, please don't push yourself if you're not in a comfortable position to do so.

I'm an autistic, pansexual man. I'm a librarian and while I do enjoy it, my true dream is to work in the medical field, there's nothing that fascinates me more than medicine. I'm an INFP-T, enneagram 9w1. I'm "slow" and take a long while to process information, so I get along best with people who are patient. I don't look at people, speak with a "sing-song" voice and am always either wringing my hands or rocking back on my heels, constantly moving in some way. I get overstimulated very easily. My peers used to frequently refer to me as "weird" but due to my mellow nature, I was generally liked regardless.

I have short, fluffy chocolate brown hair. I cut it myself so it's always a mess, but somehow I manage to pull it off. I like to tie a tiny braid in it every now and again, both because I find the act soothing and because it provides character. I'm very pale with rosy cheeks and blue-green eyes. 5'10. I have a scar across the front of my neck and wear round glasses with a golden glasses chain, adorned with little moons and stars. I usually wear a button up and a sweater with a long coat. Also, in the Genshin universe, I'd definitely have feline ears and a tail, not unlike the Kätzlein bloodline.

I have a weak heart and am a frail, sickly person in general, so I'm not very active, although I do like to swim. I also love books...novels, poetry, the act of writing itself. I enjoy drawing and writing music, too, anything creative really. And drinking. Alongside medicine, my other obsession is astronomy, cosmology in particular. That's why, if I were studying at the Academia, I'd want to be a part of the Rtawahist Darshan.

If I had a vision, I think I would have an anemo vision. I love the wind, I think there's something indescribably beautiful about it's existence, and I value freedom deeply. My weapon of choice would be a catalyst.

While I'm very timid and awkward around strangers, my friends describe me as a bubbly, cheeky person who likes to cause mischief. "Endearingly annoying". I'm good at making people laugh, although it's almost always unintentional. I've been told that I give good advice and comfort alike, but I myself am very stubborn, once I've put my mind to something I absolutely refuse to give up, for better or for worse, and I quickly grow frustrated upon failure. My love language is physical touch, but anything that involves touching my hair is my greatest weakness.

I think that's enough. Thank you soso much for your time! But again, no pressure or rush at all, okay? I can't wait to see more of your blog! :)

I would match you with...

Barbara has always been kind to you and would try to initiate a conversation with you, even if you are a bit timid.

But when you two became friends, and your bubbly and cheeky personality came out, she started falling for you.

Barbara would 100% support your dreams of working in the medical field, doing whatever she could to help.

Barbara is a very patient woman who would have no problem with your quirks.

As a fellow autistic person, that's what I call them :)

Barbara would quickly catch on to the signs that you are getting overstimulated and adjust accordingly. Whether it be compression therapy or just going somewhere with fewer external stimuli

Besides Running errands, Barbara isn't very active either. Both of you would be average activity-wise

She would love to sing any songs that you write. She might even ask you to make one for her to perform.

Barbara doesn't know much about astronomy, but she loves listening to you talk about it and teach her.

You are very kind Anon! I actually write these when I'm taking a break from schoolwork and other things, so its no pressure at all <3 Hope you enjoy!

[masongrizchel]

**Releasing these thoughts and uncertainties in the nothingness of the universe**

I just found myself waking up later than I planned originally. I was staring at the ceiling of a room filled with nothing but cast shadows of a confined space.

Staring at nothingness. 

Then I whispered to the universe: "I am no longer happy with this job." 

For some reason, I cannot identify why I said that. It will really cross your mind that despite the pay and benefits you earn with this job, I first found it fulfilling since I was too motivated to be its system's catalyst. However, the opposite happened, and I no longer see myself fulfilled with the things I managed to push through despite all the circumstances I have been experiencing.

Don't get me wrong, I was given by hands-on colleagues. I learn from them day by day. But I can't imagine doing this work in the next few years. The moment that it occurs to me that the work itself becomes repetitive and no longer gets me excited kills my motivation and drive. 

I want to go back to the university setting; I want to go back to the time when I could see the change that I have been contributing, especially whenever it is a micro-change (based on the result of my experiment) or in a macro sense, seeing my students succeed in the kind of career path that they envision for themselves.

I want to go back. But for now, finishing what I have started matters most. It is good that I am still on probation and have tested the waters I have been swimming in the past months.