#i can’t just go recasting for the damn thing

[t0ast-ghost]

The last one… it’s been coming for awhile…

Here’s my thoughts on Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

(Spoilers for- well— everything)

- Before watching this movie I was trying to figure out why they chose this name and was told by my mom it’s a Shakespeare reference which.. I should have guessed

- “A Nicholas Myer Film” Cool! Now we know who to blame or bow to

- The music is so fucking intense I’m worried now

- I know Christopher Plummer is famous, I can’t place the face though and I want to say I know the name from the muppet show

- WAIT. Michael Dorn… WORF

- Wanna let y’all know that there was a guy (Harve Bennet) who wanted to create a completely different sixth movie that would’ve been more like a prequel where they recasted everyone to have an “academy era” movie with Kirk, Spock, and McCoy shenanigans. Gene Roddenberry didn’t fucking like that idea (cause only he knows how to cast apparently)

- explosion :)

- Teacup that tells you what ship you’re on. I now understand why everyone hates Quark trying to spread his own brand when Starfleet clearly is trying to push their own into every single crevasse

- HIII SULU HIIII

- It’s nice that they gave him the ship he kept saying he was hoping for in voyage home

- I won’t make a fart joke out of “gaseous planetary anomalies” and I definitely won’t say that Q did it

- DAMN NOT THE TEACUP. NBC Hannibal would fucking hate this movie

- Forgot how much I freaking love George Takei and I am so happy they gave him more stuff to do in this movie

- Falling… for about 7 seconds which is about 4 seconds more than normal

- Fairly certain that’s Janice Rand (5:32) (edit: it is! Hi Janice!!!)

- “We have no need for assistance,” and “Stay out of the neutral zone,” sounds like challenge

- Kirk says “What are we doing here?” STARRRING IN THE SIXTH STAR TREK MOVIEE BABEYYYY

- Scotty bought a boat, Uhura teaches seminars at the academy, I love hearing about their lives, keep going

- “Where’s Spock?” Asked in the saddest wettest voice. Kirk’s got his priorities straight. Er- well- not straight exactly but they’re there

- Them trying to hide that the “special envoy” is Spock when Kirk is sitting there looking at him like this

- Sorry babygirl not taking in any of that information. I am taking in those beautiful eyes tho <3

- Ooooh starting this one off with Kirk and Spock on opposite political sides

- Kirk being the one who has to offer the olive branch probably because Spock thought he could trust him to be on the side of peace (which was a miscalculation cause he’s probably still pretty angry with the whole “you Klingon bastards killed my son” thing…)

- “I remind you this meeting is classified” as everybody splits off into chattering gossip

- Kirk actually getting angry at Spock for “volunteering” them. The giant empty room with Kirk in the shadows and only Spock in the light (plus that random person standing in a dark corner for some reason) augh the mise en scène is wonderful

- I don’t even know how to unpack all that. Kirk so prejudiced against the Klingons (finally taking a more antagonistic stance) and saying “You should have trusted me” WHICH IS WHAT SPOCK HAS ALWAYS DONE. Because he trusted that Kirk would ultimately want peace no matter how battered and broken he became.

- They changed Spock’s ears, made the points more curved into themselves

- Why does every new lieutenant like quoting regulations to Kirk? How many does he just regularly break?

- OH FOR FUCKS SAKE WHY DOES HE LOOK OVER AT SPOCK SO SOFTLY

- I love how shape her hair is (draw it draw it draw it dammnit)

- Whenever creating a Star Trek movie you need someone on the production team who loves the ship departing from space dock scenes

- “I can never forgive them for the death of my boy.” Kirk says my boy

- Okay yes, Valeris should have knocked before entering his room but Kirk should also know to lock his door when he’s talking to his diary

- Why is Valeris so involved in this movie? First she’s talking to Kirk and now we’re following her to Spock’s? Strange (my guess. She’s evil.)

- “It is a reminder to me that all things end.” Like your life. Twice. Also that’s a nice sentiment and all but it’s so sad with the context that even his own original timeline ends

- “Logic is the beginning of wisdom, Valeris, not the end.” YEAHHH OLDER SPOCK he’s got a more balanced view on the world and himself

- OKAY I absolutely adore the costume design, especially for Gorkon. Like the golden clips in the hair? The red suit adorned with studs and the giant silver necklace?? The beard??? Amazing

- I like that there’s a “chief of staff” for the Klingons. It’s like the manager at a party city

- “They all look alike” BRO THEY MOST FUCKINGLY DO NOT

- I love the chief of staff being so confused over what the napkin roll thing is. I feel that.

- Ah yes my favourite meal. Blue. With a side of orange of course.

- “I offer a toast. The Undiscovered Country…” Welp. He said it. Time to wrap up the movie

- YEP ITS SHAKESPEARE BABEYYY (thank you Spock for saying that it’s Hamlet, act III, scene I, cause I didn’t wanna look it up)

- “You’ve not experienced Shakespeare until you have read him in the original Klingon.” Quoi???

- Spock actively trying to stop Kirk from starting a war

- I think this is such a good part where the Klingons are trying to state their worries. The gradual (or not so gradual) need for assimilation to be apart of starfleet. This is a particularly big problem for the Klingons because so much of their culture has been entwined with violence which Starfleet seems almost hellbent to take away. As well as hearing troubling language such as “human rights” thrown in their faces

- IM SORRY. Kirk. You didn’t. You didn’t just compare someone to hitler.

- Spock looks actually so fucking pissed at Kirk

- “If there is to be a brave new world, our generation is going to have the hardest time living in it.” Gorkon dropping all the good lines

- McCoy just standing there adjusting his outfit and looking like the most tired man alive

- “I’m going to sleep this off.” “I’m going to go find a pot of black coffee.” Both Kirk and McCoy leaving Spock :(((

- The shaky swoop of the camera as Kirk and the rest of the bridge realize that somehow they just fired on the Klingon vessel

- Don’t care about the rest of the movie I just love the scene where everything starts floating on the Klingon vessel

- AUGH THOSE SPACE SUITS OKAY I DO STILL CARE

- Love me some good ol’ bad 3D graphics blood

- Times like this I wish I’d never skipped my tlhIngan Hol classes

- Floating dead Klingons. What. A. Scene.

- Aw Fuck Dude. The one guy getting gravity back online and everything falling to the ground and blood splattering and AUGHHH. Every time I think this scene can’t get better, it does!

- HIII MCCOY!!! He got to rush onto the bridge just to ask “are we firing torpedoes” and I appreciate that :)

- Kirk and Spock fighting over who should go to the Klingon ship and Spock saying “perhaps you’re right” and then putting his hand on Kirk’s shoulder made me more nervous than it should have. Darn you Wrath of Khan! You’ve given me trust issues. (but you're telling me this isn't supposed to look like a nerve pinch???)

- Also Kirk ultimately still trying to maintain peace. It’s his knee jerk reaction to this. He’s got what he’s said he’s wanted when incased in his own emotions about loosing his son but he knows it’s not right

- and finally, yay! McCoy gets to go on the mission!

- The actor for the Klingon that greets them is so good at the rage mixing with grief and sadness

- McCoy to the rescue!!

- Either Klingon blood is pink (like in that one game) or they wanted to keep it pg-13

- “He’s gone into some kind of damned arrest!” McCoy proceeds to straddle the Klingon on top of the table so he has leverage to do proper CPR… I have no thoughts on this that I’d like to share

- I do not believe McCoy’s punches would be strong enough to restart a heart. I’m sorry but they look so puny

- The blood bubbling as Gorkon dies is so fucking good oh my heart

- This is all happening at 2:00 fucking AM??? No wonder Kirk is tired

- “I sympathize, Mr. Scott.” Love when they make Spock say he ‘understands’ or ‘sympathizes’

- SAREKKKK!! Hehe hiiii

- “We are experiencing technical malfunction. All backup systems inoperative.” “Excellent. I… I mean, too bad.” A banger scene from Uhura and Chekov

- Rosanna DeSoto as Azetbur (the Chancellor’s daughter) plays the part so well. Again their portrayal of grief and anger while trying to get to peace is so fucking amazing. LOOK AT HER FACE

- Maybe I’m not so happy about McCoy being on this mission after all…

- The giant circular judgement chamber is so fucking cool

- MICHAEL DORN 🫵

- The sparking gavel <3

- I love the beginning of a translator translating all the Klingon’s words

- WORF IS THEIR DEFENDANT???

- That one Klingon that laughs at McCoy’s joke, wanna be friends?

- “You say you are due for retirement. May I ask, do your hands shake?” “Objection!” “I was nervous!” “No. You were incompetent.” This is like watching reality tv for me. That’s some good drama

- phew thank goodness they’re not killing McCoy. He’s too pretty to die

- The back and forth slow zoom in on McCoy & Kirk and the judge didn’t have the intensity they were going for but I appreciate the effort

- “Better to kill them now and get it over with.” That’s nice Scotty

- Oh shit Spock loosing both of his husbands in one sentencing. That cannot be good for the economy

- “An ancestor of mine maintained that if you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains however improbable, must be the truth.” Ancestor? You mean fucking Arthur Conan Doyle?? Or Sherlock??? Either way that’s a hecking lore drop

- They’ve got a murder mystery aboard the Enterprise, this is my dream

- Hey babe, new Klingon dog beast just dropped (Jackal Mastiff)

- I let out an audible “aww” of pity when I saw McCoy wrapped up in a blanket

- I can’t believe I’m only halfway through this movie what is even happening anymore

- Had a brief pause to voice crackedly yell a little bit. Something along the lines of “I do not care. I do not care! I don’t care! I just want Spock- I just want them with Spock! I do not care!” And then let myself breathe for a second or two (and then made chicken nuggets). The outburst was born of a deep sadness from the fact that they can’t just be happy and retired together. Ok, back to the movie.

- Martia just handed Kirk a blunt change my mind

- “Somebody up there wants you out of the way.” of course, it can’t just be about actual politics between the Klingons and Federation, it has to actually be about Kirk and somebody trying to kill him. Dang it.

- “But the killers may still be among them.” …wait a damn minute.. you’re saying there’s imposters- *pulled away forcefully*

- I love how every commanding officer comes into the kitchen absolutely furious that someone fired a phaser

- On that note: why is there a kitchen? And why are they preparing various cooked birds? Who’s having a banquet tonight?

- What kind of bullshit evolution puts a species genitals in their knees?

- Hate how Kirk just lets McCoy go treat the highly dangerous being alone

- “Spock was right” NO SHIT HE’S LITERALLY AN ANCESTOR OF SHERLOCK

- YASSS SULU!!! Now get your rest you beautiful man

- Spock will literally leave no stone unturned for his husbands

- Either Martia has some really good prosthetics in the cave or she’s wearing someone else’s skin… NEVERMIND haha she’s just a shapeshifter

- Chekov was so proud of himself dammit. Too bad he was so utterly wrong

- Also Valeris is so expressive, kinda loving it

- The planet seems kinda nice in the daylight.. minus the dead body I’d say it’s pretty similar to winters in Canada (yes I made the joke, please delete it before posting) (edit: nope <3 just like Canada. Made your bed, lie in it)

- “Leave me. I’m finished.” Goddamn this man’s worst enemy is the cold. Both times McCoy just gives up and tells Spock or Kirk to leave him (First time being in All Our Yesterdays)

- “If they’re even looking for us.” Bones. Spock would literally NEVER leave the both of you. That aside the rest of the Enterprise crew also loves you like crazy

- Everyone laughing on the channel with the Klingons is so funny

- Holyy shit. Is Kirk going to fight.. himself???

- McCoy angel <3

- “I can’t believe I kissed you.” Yeah. Me neither. You didn’t actually have too.

- Poor McCoy holy cannoli oil. He’s knocked out and when he wakes up immediately gets trampled by two versions of his husband

- HIIII JACKAL MASTIFF HIII

- “Since you’re all going to die anyway, why not tell you.” When I go to watch the cinema sins video (I know I’m sorry) on this movie I bet they’ll say “klingonposition” or smt like that here

- If it’s just Chang that wants Kirk dead that’s so disappointing

- McCoy looks over and sees this

- “What you want is irrelevant, what you’ve chosen is at hand.” SPOCK IS ANGRYYYYY SPOCK IS PISSSED

- Please someone let McCoy take a shower, he stinks

- WAIT VALERIS WAS THE ONE SITTING IN THE DARK CORNER OF THE ROOM IN THE BEGINNING

- The distorted wavy angle that almost feels like it’s going side to side dutch angles with each of Spock’s footsteps as he nears Valeris

- I WOULD HAVE SCREAMED IN THEATRES

- Valeris is fucking crying omg what the actual fuck

- I honestly don’t know how to take that apart. I’m still shocked and screaming a little. The reactions from each crew member being just absolutely horrified

- I’m still reeling from that but I gotta acknowledge the fact that Spock says “I prefer it dark” when Kirk enters his quarters. So did I as a teenager and my mom would tell me it was bad for my eyes

- “You and the doctor might have been killed.” “The night is still young.” They are three months from retirement. Goddammnit let them just get to be retired together on a farm or condo or smt. I don’t give a shit just let them rest.

- “Spock, you want to know something? Everybody’s human.” NO THEYRE NOT IN THIS CONTEXT. That was kind of a big point made in this movie. I think the point you’re trying to make is ‘everyone in the whole galaxy forever will always make mistakes.’

- “Doctor, would you care to assist me in performing surgery on a torpedo?”

- Chang just said, “ah the games afoot” why are there so many Sherlock Holmes references in this one? Like I know they have a hard on for famous literature but this one is named after a Shakespeare quote. Just saying it’s a bit crowded.

- They really wanted McCoy to say smt doctory while making the torpedo so they chose “we’ve got a heart beat”

- I think it would’ve been better if Chang said to be or not to be in Klingon like they did at the dinner table

- So they saved the day? Yay? Kirk and McCoy should legally not actually be there- oh they’re all clapping for them who cares

- SPOCK GETS TO SAY GO TO HELL

- Kirk did not just fucking quote Peter Pan. Shut the fuck up.

- McCoy’s look says it all. And by that I mean just let him retire with his husbands. Oh my goodness.

- Just for my mom I'm mentioning the flared pants (Spock and McCoy look kinda goofy tho)

- Ohhh so this is where they change it from “where no man” to “where no one”

- And the Enterprise rides off into the sun. What kind of Grease ending is that?

Awwe okay all of their signatures at the end was a nice touch

I don’t have much more to say here, I forgot how fun but time consuming it was to do these thought posts. I really really appreciate everyone who likes these posts because it means y’all took the time to read this which is just something so meaningful to me.

Thank you all so much <3

Masterpost

[waratah-moon]

SMAU where y/n plays young Rhaenyra on HOTD and her Instagram interactions with the cast. This is literally just shameless self-indulgent fluff. masterlist, here’s another Matt Smith SMAU

January 2022

tagged theemilycarey

28,461 likes

yourinstagram Coming for the throne

↳ theemilycarey The girlies take Westeros

↳ yourinstagram Margaritas in hand

↳ theemilycarey We’ll make a day of it

username Alicent and Rhaenyra supremacy

username My lesbian senses are tingling

-

May 2022

deuxmoi via Instagram stories

-

June 2022

tagged gameofthrones, houseofthedragonHBO

Liked by emilia_clarke and 103,361 others

yourinstagram What’s a Targaryen without a dragon?

theemilycarey It’s about drive it’s about power 💥

emmaziadarcy We have the best childhood photos

↳ yourusername Very royal, amirite?

houseofthedragonHBO Fire and blood will reign 🩸

username August can’t come quick enough

-

July 2022

75,317 likes

enews More pics from the world premiere of #houseofthedragon online!

username Love a good old family reunion

username How are they all so attractive

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username Y/n is giving Targaryen realness

-

Liked by theemilycarey, livkatecooke and 204,537 others

yourinstagram Touristy things and interviews

fabienfrankel Photo credit pls 📸

↳ yourusername Sorry fabienfrankel u a great job at taking the first photo. Really got the angles right.

username I love that the cast is friends outside of set

username MATT SMITH CONTENT

username This cast’s chemistry is insane

-

September 2022

tagged yourusername

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theemilycarey sneaky lil snap from behind the scenes of episode 3

yourusername besties forevsies

↳ theemilycarey ❤️❤️❤️

username my feed is just Emily and Y/n and I’m not upset

username yesssss bts content

-

32,461 likes

hotdfans Tonight we say goodbye to the incredible Y/n L/n and Emily Carey.

username I’m really going to miss them

username Rhaenyra’s chemistry with Daemon is off the charts

↳ username Y/n’s chemistry with Matt is off the charts

username They should have done a whole season with Y/n and Emily

-

tagged theemilycarey, fabienfrankel

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yourinstagram I love you all so much

fabienfrankel You’ll be missed kiddo

↳ yourusername I’m still coming to dinner

↳ fabienfrankel Damn thought I got rid of you

↳ yourusername Never

theemilycarey Thnks fr th mmrs ❤️

emmaziadarcy Couldn’t have asked for anyone better

livkatecooke Can’t wait to see you take on the world yourusername

username Living for bts content

username If I just replay the first 5 episodes it means she hasn’t been recast, right?

[chlodoll]

i was just trying something here and the week is now over (this was also getting longer than expected)

random thoughts of the week 😮‍💨

that song from north west is so catchy i can’t lie! it’s your bestie ~ miss miss westie ~~~

tiktok shop is really ruining the experience on there

andrew and emma broke up over a decade ago .. please get it together stop the lala land edits i beg

idk if those summer fridays lip balms are worth $24

i need to start watching sports these men are always fighting

selena selena selener… oh girl hahahaha

are kids really in 8th grade unable to spell their own names? what is going on?

still hate a man with a podcast mic

i really have no memory of fantasia and jennifer hudson being on the same season of american idol… i thought they were on different ones? you mean jennifer wasn’t a winner but won in the end?! oh i know that’s right!!

i’m actually shocked kylie didn’t walk the carpet at a wonka premiere yet she was there for most of them?

pardi is 40??? he has a kid???????

they did WHAT in the senate hearing room!!!!

suki still has that photo up on twitter cropping nabiyah out? oh she’s a nasty one and stands by it

and fuck south korea for not giving bts that exemption! giving it to people for playing fucking video games! are they insane?!

ariana needs to just rest and revamp rem beauty OR let it go

both of those rings are hideous

the day james gunn stops coming online and fact checking every damn thing is the day i know peace

these white boys of the month are more in the gutter each time. bring back the heartthrob!

seeing those pics of emma stone from behind with that long black hair for poor things is actually the thing convincing me to watch. idk what it’s about otherwise but that hair!

i never really felt deeply about veneers but zendaya should never get them. she has to keep the toof

it’s been time to recast kang

i really do love the bow trend. that one is really cute

i just want zac efron to be happy

how are they mad at people keeping up with tz and call us weirdos who only like tom and don’t like z when they get majority of their z news from here… if we didn’t like her how does that work? if they really thought we were the weirdos why are they here too?

book authors making fake accounts to leave 1 star reviews? on goodreads? wtf

i would love for meghan and megan to meet

i’m shocked people like the movie the holiday so much. even more that people loved the jack and kate relationship. i must’ve tuned them out each time i watched cause i have no idea how they happened

bridergton will be cancelled before they get to all those love stories. they gotta start doubling up. and shouldn’t have changed the order

drake and camilla cabello? please be serious!

why are they even releasing aquaman in theaters?

sydney sweeney is suddenly styled incredibly well

where is simone ashley casting news

the 9 month cruise on a boat from 2003 sounds like a bad idea

who was that white man who instantly became more attractive saying that grown woman by beyoncé was his favorite song by her?

when are they announcing spider man 4?

what did charles say to get them to totally ruin the crown? they were on his neck before. claire foy didn’t work her ass off for them to end the show like that

my reading goal is going to be 40 next year i’m over this

[forabeatofadrum]

Ljubim te (20/24)

AO3 | S&C  

–

RECAST

Kurt walks out of his university building. He didn’t have evening classes, but he needed to get his mind off things and the building is still open. Kurt decided to work a bit more on the play as a distraction. One of the leads got recast and it brought a whole new dynamic, so everyone is encouraged to rehearse as much as possible, even alone.

It didn’t really work, which is why an hour later, he’s already leaving.

“Dober večer,” he says to the doorman and he takes his phone out of his pocket to check if bus 6 is earlier than bus 14. That’s when he sees that has just missed a call from Sunil. That’s odd. He knows Sunil is with Tadeja, which is why Kurt opted for pizza instead of Boni with them.

Kurt calls him back while walking to the bus station.

“Heya,” he says.

“Oh, hey, Kurt,” Sunil says, “Where are you?”

“I just got out of the AGRFT building,” he replies, “I was working a bit more on Ulicia, and I decided to visit the set to get into the whole mood and-”

“Blaine is here.”

Kurt stops in his tracks.

“I’m sorry, what?” Kurt exclaims.

“Uh-uh. Yes, he came here, knocking, looking for you. I said you weren’t home and he was going to leave, but I told him to stay,” Sunil says that very pointedly, and Kurt imagines that he’s looking at Blaine while doing so, “I told him I’d call you. And here we are.”

“Here we are,” Kurt says, dumbfounded.

Kurt hears some shuffling on the other side of the line. Tadeja says something, but he can’t make it out, but the next thing he knows, Blaine’s voice is ringing in his ear.

“Kurt?” Blaine sounds out of breath.

“Yes?”

Really, what is happening?

“I… I, uh, I need to see you. Like, right now.”

“Okay?”

“Can you come-” Blaine’s cut off by Sunil. Kurt cannot hear what he’s saying, but he can hear Blaine humming in agreement.

“… Blaine?”

“Uh, can you come to my place?” Blaine asks.

Blaine can’t see it, but Kurt’s eyebrows raise.

He has no idea what Blaine is doing. He was certain that the two of them wouldn’t see each other for a while, and now Blaine wants to meet up to tell him something?

“Is Quinn okay with that?” he asks, just to be sure.

“… I don’t know where she is, but yes.”

This is getting stranger and stranger, but Kurt decides to take a leap of faith.

“Alright. I’ll see you in a few.”

“Oh. Yes. Alright,” Blaine sounds surprised and relieved, “Yes, yes, I will be there. Bye.”

He hangs up and Kurt stares at his phone for a few seconds before making his way to Blaine’s apartment.

--

Kurt’s nervous, but when he sees Blaine running down the street, he can’t help but laugh. It looks a bit comedic.

“Hey, long time no see,” Kurt decides to aim for casualness.

“I came here as soon as I could, but those damn bikes are so uncomfortable!” Blaine pants, which makes Kurt laugh even more. The bikes really are wack.

Now that Blaine’s up close, Kurt takes in his appearance. It’s not comedic after all. He looks sweaty and dishevelled. Some of his curls have escaped the gel and he has a frantic look in his eyes. He’s trembling slightly.

“Well. You’re here.”

“I am here. Please come in.”

Kurt follows Blaine inside and upstairs and he is still wondering what is happening. Why did Blaine go to Kurt’s place? Where did Quinn go?

“So,” Blaine says once they’re inside and he’s closed the front door behind him.

“So,” Kurt mirrors, because he has no clue what to say. There is an awkward tension in the air. Kurt’s nervous, and Blaine seems so as well. “You, uh, wanted to see me?”

Blaine nods.

“May I ask why?”

Blaine opens his mouth a couple of times to speak, but nothing comes out. He was so hellbent on being here, but now he seems lost for words. Or maybe he does know what to say, but he doesn’t know how to, so Kurt helps him out.

“Does it have anything to do with our talk in the park?”

Blaine nods slowly.

Great.

Kurt wonders for a second if Blaine is going to reject him again.

“Look, Blaine-”

Blaine must’ve realised Kurt’s trail of thoughts, because he immediately cuts Kurt off.

“Wait, no! I want to be with you!” he blurts out.

This is the second time today that Kurt’s getting a total emotional whiplash. His head is spinning and he is trying to figure out if he’s heard it correctly.

When Kurt remains silent, Blaine’s nervosity only seems to grow, and he starts talking about how he likes Kurt too and how he wants to give it a shot and what not, but Kurt can’t keep up.

He wants that as well.

Heck, he’s wanted to be with Blaine ever since he realised he likes Blaine, but he never let himself fantasise and he never acted on it, because Blaine is straight with a girlfriend. But now the same Blaine is confessing his feelings in a very awkward, blubbery way.

Okay, Kurt has to admit that sometimes he did let himself fantasise, but was is nothing like this.

“Blaine!” Kurt exclaims, which makes Blaine shut up.

“Sorry,” Blaine says after he’s calmed down a bit, “Fuck, I was rehearsing in my head what I’d say but instead…” he laughs awkwardly.

“Did you mean it, though?” Kurt asks and he hates how hopeful he sounds.

“Yes, of course,” Blaine says as if it’s obvious, “I wouldn’t embarrass myself like this if it weren’t real.”

“… This is so sudden,” Kurt admits. He is hearing what he’s wanted to hear, but it is so unexpected and Kurt’s still confused.

Blaine runs his hand over his face.

“I know, I know, but you like me back, right? So, uh…”

“Yes, but around an hour ago you swore you had a girlfriend and that you couldn’t leave her and now you’re asking me out,” Kurt points out, “You have to walk me through this. Where is Quinn? What happened?”

“She broke up with me when she saw I’d much rather be with you.”

Now, this is another whiplash. Quinn broke up with Blaine? Quinn was so enamoured by Blaine during dinner.

“And then she told me to go after you. So I did.”

“And you’re fine with that?” Kurt asks, just to be sure. In the park, Blaine was about to break down at the thought of him and Quinn being broken up.

“She loves me,” Blaine says after a small beat of silence, “She wants me to be happy. And I…” He takes a shaky breath. “To be honest, I am terrified, Kurt.”

Kurt’s heart breaks a little bit when he hears how scared Blaine is. He now knows that Blaine’s entire life has revolved about what other people think is best for him. This must be terrifying for him. For the first time, he’s doing what he truly wants.

“Oh, Blaine…” Kurt pushes his own confusion aside and he steps closer to hug him.

“You’re right, this is all so sudden. I am trying- trying to make sense of it myself,” Blaine sounds stricken, but he returns the hug, “I don’t know what to do or what to think or who I am, but I know I like you.”

“Blaine.”

“I like you. That is the only thing that makes sense to me now.”

“I like you too,” Kurt says quietly, “Oh, how I like you. I think I started liking you when we first met, but I didn’t realise until the storm.”

And finally, Blaine laughs. Kurt didn’t realise how much he missed it.

“That’s early. I didn’t fully understand it until I kissed you.”

The two of them stand in Blaine’s hallway, holding each other. Kurt can feel Blaine calming down. The tension is leaving his body and Kurt closes his eyes. It’s silent again, but now it is a comfortable silence.

If you’d told Kurt this morning that he’d be standing in Blaine’s hallway with Blaine in his arms after he just confessed that he wants to be with Kurt, Kurt would’ve laughed.

“Kurt?”

“Hm.”

“Sorry if I just- I put that on you.”

“Hm?”

“You’re right. This is a lot out of, uh, not nowhere. But it is a lot. I- I can understand if you need some time to think about what I said. I- I won’t take it personally if you want to leave, or even if you don’t want to be… with me.”

Blaine’s breath hitched during that last part.

“Especially since I am still… I don’t know what I am doing. I don’t know what I- I mean…”

“Blaine, what is it?” Kurt asks kindly.

“I think I am gay.”

Kurt tightens the hug.

“It’s- It’s always been guys,” Blaine says, “I just didn’t want to believe it, I think?”

He sounds confused, but Kurt doesn’t hold it against him. Again, he’s been here. He gets it.

“But this is so, uh, so new for me. Or not. I don’t know, because I guess I’ve always been gay. But, uh, this is...”

“Weird?” Kurt prompts.

“Fucked up,” Blaine deadpans and Kurt can’t help it, but he snorts, which in turn makes Blaine giggle for a second or two.

“Fucked up, huh?”

“Not bad fucked up… I think,” Blaine clarifies, “But fucked up in its own way.”

Kurt hums in agreement. That sums it up nicely.

“Yeah, uh, so, I understand if you, uh, don’t want to…” Blaine’s breath hitches, “Don’t want to be with a guy who’s still figuring stuff out. I can’t- I don’t even know what to tell my family, or friends, or… anyone.”

“Blaine…” Kurt slowly untangles himself from Blaine. He knows what he wants.

“Cause I am apparently in a closet, and uh, I need to figure out what to do with that. And if I want to get out of it-”

“Blaine-” Kurt grabs Blaine by the shoulders.

“And I get if that is a dealbreaker or, uh… I mean, again, I shouldn’t have just blurted that out-”

“Blaine, wait-” Kurt makes Blaine look at him.

“But I swear, I wasn’t- I had this in my head-”

“Blaine, I don’t want to leave!” Kurt says loudly.

Blaine’s eyes widen.

“You don’t?”

Kurt shakes his head.

“No, I don’t. In fact, I can do with some coffee.”

“Right,” Blaine says and he puts his hands over Kurt’s, “I have coffee.”

Kurt smiles.

“Lead the way.”

--

End notes: [Lucius voice] Oh my God, it’s happening.

[cryptfile]

Hii!! Can I request frenchie from the boys x f! reader, maybe she's patching him up after a long day? <33

yes,,, thank you for this from the bottom of my heart, might went above with what you actually asked, but whatever, i’m living my best and just rolling with it.

⟢ mountains at midnight, [ frenchie x f!reader ]

summary — After a failed relationship, Serge knocks on your door half baked / half bleeding-to-fucking-death.

warnings — angst, some smooches, it's implied that reader is in her twenty-somethings, filthy mouth, frenchie is in loOOoOve here, some fighting, fluff in the end, usual the boys content aka violence, blood, drugs, mentions of murder, infinite sadness, if you’re a medic you might hate me, little nina is a warning herself.

side notes — hi lovely people on the internet! first things first: i've recasted frenchie to dev patel cause fuck zionists, also loved writing for frenchie, been writing about gen v on wattpad but this? a whole different level. word's on the street my ass latin, so you know now english is not my first language and if there's any mistakes is my own fault being just a girlie out here,, comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated and very much loved! thank you guys so much for the support.

It’s way too late when you hear the knocks on your door.

You’re not used to receive visitors in the middle of the night. Your friends know you hate people to show up uninvited so it’s almost a non-spoken arrangement: You sell the weed to afford med school and they keep you out of trouble.

So you can’t stop yourself from thinking the absolute worst when you hear the noise in your front door, already cursing cause you don't have these expensive cameras that allows you to watch who's outside: What if the police knows you’re selling weed? Worse. What if Vought discovered all about your nice ability of astral projection? Just the thought of it makes you grab the bat, trying to find something to defend yourself with as if it’s going to work against someone as powerful as Homelander.

When you open the door, it’s something similar to seeing a ghost.

Cause that's what Frenchie is to you. A fever dream you must experience after being so tired, after exhausting yourself with the damn residency. You've been doing turns lately in the hospital and you are drained all the fucking time, too many hours standing and trying not to fuck it up it’s now passing you the check.

But when he talks. Jesus fucking Christ, when he talks, you just know it's him in the flesh, stopping the world for a minute — "Bonne nuit," he says all normal like you understand more than just the basics of French. "Long time no see, mon ami."

How does he still remembers your address? How did he managed to get to your apartment when you explicitly said you don't want him anywhere near you? Your heart skips a beat when you're realizing the blood covering his shirt, the dirt on his skin, the bruise forming in his eye: he's injured.

It makes sense soon after, why he's there outside your place, surpassing the locks that protected the building and are supposed to keep people like him out yet, failed miserably. You let out a scoff, taking mental notes of talking about security to the building manager tomorrow.

"You need to go to a hospital, there's also a vet clinic a couple’ blocks away, both do the work" It's tempting. The thought of closing the door in his face after he was a complete asshole with you last time you saw him, but you cannot bring yourself to be cruel, to leave him standing while he seeks for somebody to stitch him up. — "Told you not to come here, Frenchie."

He's different now. He has now cut his hair in a different way, split lip while he pouts like he has loose a huge fight. He looks better, more composed even, but you don't let it slip while you look at him, debating if he won the fight he was involved in or if he just managed to escape, as usual, always in danger.

"Please," he says placing his hand in the door frame like he just read your mind, preventing you from closing the door. "Need your help, mon docteur."

When he looses balance you know shit's for real, quickly grabbing him by the waist as you take one of his hands to place it in your shoulder. He smells like blood, sweat, and weed, and it takes a minute for you to get used to it, being so intense at first when you hold him close to you that it stays with you even when you help him lay in the couch, already knowing it's going to be stained forever.

Fuck's sake. It's not physically possible to say no to him.

You hate him from the moment he's inside. Hate how he has you now all stressed looking for everything you need to prevent him from bleeding out on your couch, still trying to understand if you're worried about his well being or if it's actually about the fact that he could die in your apartment with good grams of weed well hidden, leading you to arrest under micro-trafficking and possible murder charges.

And when you see the large cut on his stomach, you know exactly why you guys didn't work out in the first place, why his way of living was so different than yours trying to keep a low profile, not used to get in trouble with superheroes, usually surviving. You hold your breath in as you notice the situation, his body bruised, blood spread all over like it was a medal.

“The person who did this didn’t do any harm to your organs” you say inspecting, lucky bastard. “But you're gonna’ need stitches.”

"See? I’m gonna' be fine, docteur" he says almost trying to keep you steady while you took the new-moon-shaped needle, that damn nickname you hate with all your guts. You know he would not come if it wasn't absolutely necessary, his gaze following you like he cannot possibly believe he's talking to you again after all that time promising not to. "Not planning to die on your settee."

"You're high" it's not a question but more of a statement. "So please, shut up if you are really not planning to die tonight."

You’re struck by his accent, the way he combined the words so easily while you worked on stitching his skin, finally stopping the bleeding as you can breathe in peace. Med school has been awful, but at least you can do decent stitches even under the dim lights of the lamps, looking at your work almost proud moments after.

Handled him like a fucking pro.

You seem to forget about the contact, being trained to be a doctor has hit deep down now that you can keep professional at all times, but for Frenchie, even after being pretty much stabbed, he managed to fill his mind with memories of you while your cold fingertips close the cut, to think, once again, that he does not deserve you at all, your meeting being a mistake he wouldn't do all over again.

He stills hallucinates about when he met you in your second year of university, selling weed in your campus parties making a pretty good list of clients for yourself. He remembers being so mad at you for stealing possible clientèle at the time, he was planning on beating your ass and scare you out until you didn't dare to sell at all. At least, that was the idea until he notices his potential nemesis. You.

He talked about the situation with Little Nina convincing her he could take care of the problem, but in reality, he chooses to make you his problem instead. You were just a twenty-something med student that stayed up late at night and sell plain weed in order to afford some stuff he knew you needed: How could he be aggressive with you?

He's almost whipped before even talking to you, after following you for a while without you even noticing, he's studying you like you're, indeed, the enemy. And when he finally talks to you in that stupid party, you finally seem to notice he's not there for a nice business, not when he's pulling you aside from all the noise.

You both are so different it's annoying, however, fits so good must be a curse.

You managed to work out the next couple of months, split the clients, the money, and there were no suspects until Nina found out and killed one of your classmates in response, leaving you surrounded by cops and detectives and a profuse sadness that never seemed to go away.

Frenchie is pretty sure you're one of the best thing he used to have in his life, utterly convinced that he must remain far from you after years of not talking to you, yet, he's unable to do it much longer. Maybe it's the weed, the fever and the pain all combined together, but when he noticed he was close to your place, he choose to seek for your help instead of turning to his teammates.

He's no good for you. Even after not being around Nina and changing completely. He's simply no good for you.

You work in silence, unsure of what to say at first. Your breathing is steady as you cover the wound with bandages, neck sore already after keeping the same position over the minutes without sleeping much all that week. Frenchie doesn't whine even when it hurts, making it easier to work with as you check other injuries.

When it comes to the split lip, you know it's going to be a thing.

"Thanks for patching me up," he says while you press the alcohol revealing a much smaller wound that you'd actually imagined, mouth's always bleed tons. "I'm just sorry for showing up so late, mon ami."

Inconsiderate. Your eyes dart the movements of his upper lip while he speaks, trying to clean the blood while it moves with no victory.

"Please talk to me princesse" he says soon after, crazy by your silence — “Please.”

Your eyes narrow in response, looking at him while inspecting his lip. “How did you manage to get so damn fucked up?” You wished you didn't ask, because you already know how he got it, how he was working now for a whole different group doing suicidal missions all the time, heard it from a close friend.

He stays silent for a while, and you cannot help but roll your eyes in response. You’re used to it, to the lack of information and the blatant lie he always used to tell just to reassure you, so instead, you continue cleaning his wounds with alcohol, pressing the gauze with less patience now that he regained the color of his skin. You’re simply not doing it anymore.

“Just stay still so we can do this fast enough” you say tired already, having to deal with him even just ten miserable minutes results in a classic headache.

Silence. You are dragged by the current into an awkward silence, inspecting the stitches and the bruises that now appeared in his skin. He’s warm to the touch in spite of the blood loss, and you cannot help but worry about his well-being deep in your mind, hating him for it: The guy disappears however he wants to, and now has the fucking nerve to show up like nothing ever happened? God.

It’s impossible to keep quiet for the next two minutes, specially when you notice he’s biting the inside of his cheek like he’s stopping himself from saying something stupid — “What?”

“Nothing,” he responds, avoiding your gaze. "I know you're mad at me, docteur."

"I'm pretty mad at you, you're right" you admit in a low voice, finally taking your utensils to the kitchen sink when you finish, cursing when you notice you got blood on your shirt. "That's why you're waiting an hour before leaving. Not involving in whatever is going on in your life right now.”

His pained expression makes you almost regret everything you say. He knew he deserved it, but it didn't stop him from being miserable when he hears you, the cold words lingering in the air as they repeated in his mind over and over again.

"Sober up. Leave after."

It's almost a command, and he hates the sound of it, far from the way he wanted you to command him in reality, the sound of your voice making him shiver. He hates every second of it, remembering why he kept far, giving you space to continue your life without him in the picture.

It stings on Frenchie’s chest, and you try to keep your pride high enough to not think about how much you actually missed him, how you're done with him after moving on at least twice since the last time you saw him, staring at the blood circling in the drain.

"I'm sorry, mon ami" he says when you pass close to him, grabbing the dirty towels as you search, in your mind, for ways to make miracles in that sofa, and you believe him for a second when he grabs you by the wrist, cause deep down you just want him to be sorry for all the shit he did, the lies, the danger.

You just started to sell weed again recently, and his sudden visit makes you so damn uncomfortable: You don't want to take anyone's clients, you learned that the hard way. "I'll never be able to make it up to you docteur, not even in a million years. Je ne voulais pas te faire de mal."

You don't fully get what he says, and you blame it on that fucking app that's been teaching you french all along, you don't even dare to look at him until you think you can handle his intense gaze, now burning in your cheek — "Created this huge mess just to leave me alone to the fucking wolves."

“And there will not be a day I won’t regret it.”

“You’re not going to be able to make it up to me even in a century, Serge.”

It happens all so sudden after, when he pulls you down slightly, enough to press the palm of your hand flat against his chest, the feeling of his heartbeat giving you straight up chills. It’s beating so fast you’re sure it’s abnormal, the expression of his face almost begging you to have patience with him, that he just needs you beyond explanation.

“Don’t call me like that,” he asks, and you’re just standing there, so fucking close, looking at him slightly blushed.

“Like what?”

“Like I don’t mean anything to you, coeur. Like we’re strangers.”

“I don’t know you, at all” you admit in a low voice, and it saddens you to say it out loud — “I don’t think I ever did.”

God. You don’t expect it, you don’t expect the visit, the way he enters to your life again through the main door, dissolving you completely. You don’t expect any of it, it catches you by surprise without giving you any time to even prepare yourself.

He somehow manages to make sit down close to him, composed now that the he’s not bleeding-to-death. And fuck, it takes a minute for you to adjust, to notice what you’re actually doing, the feeling of his hand holding your wrist making it impossible for you to leave, to even put some necessary distance, his breathing changing as you got closer.

“We’re not strangers, mon docteur, never would when my heart beat that fast for you. To me, you’re the most real thing in my life” he’s smiling, and you can’t help but look at him amazed of his way of always change everything around. “It’s visible you don’t want me here, but I cannot stop myself from coming every single time, tu me manques, coeur.”

“You miss me, huh?” you ask almost in disbelief.

“You are missing from me,” Frenchie corrects. He knows the world is a pretty fucked up place to be, but he just wants you to be okay, to avoid trouble and just live a regular happy life.

You are willing to reply, to say something about it, about the time you spend hating his ass and missing him at the same time, but you stay silent when you can feel his gaze following your every movement, when he’s the one that puts his free hand on your cheek, his touch being enough to warm up your face, staining your cheeks red.

It’s so intense. The lack of air, the way his eyes find yours in demand of something you already know.

“Please forgive me” Frenchie says, blatant sincerity. “I’m deeply sorry, mon docteur. I’m the worst thing you’ll ever met, and I cannot help but come back to you.”

His words echo in your brain, and you don’t know exactly when, but you lean into his touch, the palm of his hand warm against your cheek.

“Fuckin’ hate you.”

You don’t. You know you don’t hate him at all. It’s quite the opposite, and it weights on your chest as he smiles like he just got his life back in track again, like it’s everything it takes to make him really happy after all that shit he’s enduring day after day.

And you try put some distance between both of you seconds after, but your heart betrays you sooner than you expect and it’s all it takes for him to finally kiss you, a tender kiss at first that freezes you for an instant, his touch transforming in something else — Something your skin has already experienced before, a taste you’ve savoured long time ago. Makes you shiver when you realize how it feels not foreign at all but just natural, like something you already learnt but it’s kept in the depths of your mind.

He’s damanding when pressing his lips against you, and it clouds your mind for a second, a thick gaze that just makes you dumb at his touch. His hands on your hips are pulling you closer without even caring for his damn stitches, and it becomes intoxicating, the need to keep on kissing him, to have him close, you forget about Little Nina, the weed, and almost everything that surrounds you.

Heavy breathing you seemed to understand it all. Nose touching his as you get it. Maybe you do need to talk. Maybe it’s important to keep your guard down one last time. You cannot avoid him much longer, not when your own heart aches in need.

Serge’s like climbing a mountain at midnight: Just impossible.

[olderthannetfic]

So my favourite character has just been recast.. again...in a completely random form that has zero resemblance to it.. the second 'incarnation' was bad enough but this. this takes the p. The worst thing is, the fan art has started already and - live and let live - but filtering this stuff out when the character and ship has the same name is a nightmare. There has been ONE, ONE picture, and people are already projecting the narrative across. WHY. WHY IS THIS. WHAT FOR. I want to be in fandom but one weird version made it bad enough and now there's another bee on a stick fooling the hive and I think I'm gonna lose my mind. a) I cannot work out for the LIFE of me why they cannot cast this character properly (what's the point of a character having specific qualities that make it itself and not something else, if they ignore them and make it something else???) - BUT I do know what it is, it's the way casting works at those levels and it's not about the perfect fit but money and who knows who and other secret stuff and people don't see the cynicism of it so lap it up.. and b) for the love of Gene, how does one do fandom. Now it's 2 to 1 bee stick versions. You know, if you don't like something, usually its pretty easy to avoid it. But when it's the same names/sub franchises of the same franchise HOW DO YOU NOT SEE IT. And people are like 'they're the same characters so gonna spam the content forever and ever!!' and you're like IT'S A STICK WITH A PERSON ON IT STOP TELLING ME THIS IS MY CHARACTER. THESE TWO THINGS ARE NOT THE SAME. Seriously though. Tags yes. Content filter, yes but some of this will be unavoidable. I am at a loss, are there other giant fandoms plagued by goofy recasts and diluted content? Or is it just this one will be forever cursed? Now any fic bang, or fanzine will seem to be OBLIGATED to included every version, every balloon with a face on it; every human stick man pretending to be the same character. I just want to enjoy my thing. I don't want the other thing. I DON'T WANT IT. How does one manage without scrapping one's hobby altogether or at least cutting down engagement significantly?

You don't have to answer if there isn't on, there probably isn't an answer I just wanted to rant anway. it's just a crappy thing and a 1st world problem. I genuinely wonder if other fans/fandoms go through this though and what effect it has. *if you're confused about the bee stick thing it was something about training bees by using a stick with a stripey blob on the end imitating a bee, and they believed it. And Neil Gaiman commented "Other dimensional beings are undoubtedly amazed at what human beings will accept as human beings too. 'But it’s just a stick with a person on it.' "

--

And then he forgot the post and went to comment that and was confused by all the "God damn it, Neil!" reblogs. Yes, I recall.

I like Sherlock Holmes. Some versions are pretty close (but always get Watson wrong). Those RDJ films actually get Watson right but pick unusual aspects of the books to focus on compared to other adaptations. Many versions, like Sherlock, completely misunderstand the character.

I can’t really comment on your case without having some clue what fandom you’re actually talking about.

[eggtoasties]

dazed bees to honey

Pairing: Shisui Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

Rating: T

Word Count: 6.3k

Better on AO3

Chapter 2

______________________________________

Getting Sakura’s attention had been…difficult at best. Trying to work around his erratic schedule was near impossible given Sakura’s equally hectic schedule and Shisui wasn’t sure how to approach the Hokage and demand that she rearrange his missions to better accommodate his dating schemes.

But, he had never met anyone more alluring—the sway of Sakura’s hips, the creaminess of her skin, the way her eyes lit up when he brought little trinkets he acquired from far away missions. She makes the blood rush to his cheeks when she makes fun of him and he had never known that getting his bones crushed would make him feel like he was the luckiest man on Earth.

She was the sun—bringing him light and warmth like he had never before experienced, and he was the moon orbiting around her. He needed to be closer; he wanted to be consumed by her. She could crack his chest open in two and carve her name in the ribs protecting his heart and it still wouldn’t be close enough.

He just didn’t know how to tell her.

___

Shisui had been idly sharpening kunai at his dining room table waiting for his bread to proof, when he received a summons. Tapping at the balcony door, a small crow was impatiently waiting for Shisui to retrieve the message tied at its foot. Wondering why Itachi sent a crow instead of making the short trip to his apartment, Shisui set his weapon down and ambled towards the sliding glass door, making sure to grab seeds for the summons.

Letting out a squawk, the crow started pecking at his door faster. Alarmed that Itachi was possibly in danger, Shisui shunshined to the balcony and grabbed the crow to get to the message. Puffing its feathers and pecking at Shisui’s hands, the summons squawked indignantly and Shisui offhandedly wondered when Itachi had kept such poorly behaved crows.

Gently releasing it into the air and unfurling the message, Shisui read:

Came back from the mission a few days ago. At training ground 7 if you’d like to join. -S. Haruno

His heart pounded. Sakura was back in the village and she contacted him promptly afterwards to ask to spar? Dough be damned he was sprinting to training ground 7, he thought giddily. He looked down at himself—green fuzzy socks, loose gray sweats, and an old t-shirt—he had to get ready! His cheeks warmed. Wait, he mentally stammered. How did she know where he lived? How did she know where to send the summons to? Did she snoop around his medical files to find his address because for some reason, that made his throat dry.

Running to his bedroom while haphazardly throwing his clothes off, he suddenly stilled again. She had sent him a crow? She had a crow summons? There were a few crow summoners in the village, Shisui reasoned. She could have gotten a contract from Aoba or someone else. But, the thought of Itachi presenting the summoning contract that he had bestowed as a sign of trust and friendship made Shisui frown. As the elder, and the first contract holder, he should have been the one to give her the contract to sign. Or, Itachi should have gone to him and inform Shisui of his intentions.

Nodding to himself, Shisui made a note to stop by Itachi’s house later and question him.

___

Arriving at the edge of training ground 7 in record time, Shisui paused as he saw Sakura and Itachi in their uniforms warming up together. Sakura was in standard uniform sans the flak jacket and Itachi was in his ANBU uniform as always. Shisui fidgeted uncomfortably. He had worn what Itachi rudely called “the douchebag” shirt—a loose black sleeveless top where the arm holes were cut down to the bottom of his ribs. The tank top, Itachi always lectured, could hardly be defined as a shirt since it was so open. Itachi had questioned the practicality of a training top that would leave one so vulnerable to weapons and Shisui at the time, had retorted that he would understand when he was older.

Beginning to wonder if he should discreetly go back home to change, Sakura and Itachi called Shisui over.

“Oh, you came!” Sakura shouted excitedly as she beckoned him towards the middle of the training field.

As he walked slowly towards the pair, Itachi assessed Shisui.

“I see you got my summons,” he said, raising his eyebrow when he took in Shisui’s clothes. “Nice pants.”

Shisui flushed. He had chosen his tightest black training pants. Pants that he knew made his ass look good, thank you very much, but at the moment he was wondering if Sakura would think he was trying too hard. Or worse, he mentally shuddered, a douchebag.

“I was excited when Itachi told me you were in the village. I wanted to work on my response times with you,” Sakura started, interrupting Shisui’s mental torture. His heart fluttered at the thought of her wanting to spar with him and he let out a little breath of relief realizing that the crow was indeed Itachi’s. He crossed his arms in a poor attempt to cover the long slits in his shirt.

“I can dodge pretty much anything,” Sakura continued, beginning to sway on the balls of her feet, pink pony tail swinging with the motion. “But I wanna see how I’ll do against an opponent I can’t hit—or at least that’s what Itachi says,” she said, smiling at him prettily.

The early morning sun illuminated her face and made her green eyes impossibly bright. The faint ring of gold around her pupils winked at him and he swore he could feel his pulse reverberate in his skull. He realized she was waiting for a response. He licked his lips, mouth suddenly dry, and all he could muster out was a weak, “Sounds good.”

Sakura nodded happily and walked a few paces away from him, wringing out her arms. Suddenly pulling out kunai from her holster and twirling them around her forefingers, she faced him.

“Taijutsu only. Ready whenever you are, Shisui-san.”

___

She was fast, Shisui noted. He had expected as much given the way she took him by surprise in her office, cutting his shunshin off. He also factored in the fact that she regularly trained with Itachi, Sasuke, and Kakashi who were notoriously quick on their feet. But, not as fast as him.

Flickering in and out of her reach, he studied her movements with his sharingan. He knew that Itachi was on the sidelines, similarly monitoring her, but Shisui wanted to brand the image of her looking at him like he was prey for the rest of his life. Sakura was an incredibly flexible fighter, he noted. Depending on the type of attack, weapon, and opening he left, she would quickly and seamlessly recalibrate.

There were times her movements reflected Tsunade-sama’s—sharp and fast and meant to obliterate. Other times, Shisui realized, she would adopt Might Guy’s Strong Fist technique, Asuma’s melee style, or most surprisingly, the graceful but precise movements of the Gentle Fist technique.

Bracing a chakra enforced forearm against a kick to his head he asked, “Who taught you the Gentle Fist?”

Grunting and trying to strike his open stomach she responded, “My graduating class has two Hyuugas.” He side stepped away from her punch and flickered behind her. Ducking when she swung a kunai to his head and dodging the knee about to pummel his face, he shunshined a little farther away.

“Hyuuga don’t hide their techniques because no one can use it without the Byakugan, but someone would have had to teach you those movements,” he said breathing heavily.

“Kakashi copies them to piss people off and I was—am close to them,” Sakura said catching her breath. He watched as she pressed the back of her hand to her sweaty forehead and picked the hem of her shirt up to wipe at the rest of her face. Her toned stomach glistened with sweat. Little rivulets of perspiration rolled down her abs and Shisui cursed, damn.

“Was it the little Hyuuga genius? Neji-kun?” Shisui asked, remembering Sasuke’s clear distaste for the boy.

Itachi chose then to materialize in Shisui’s line of vision, cutting his view of Sakura. Pouting, Shisui flash stepped in front of Sakura, startling her while Itachi began his commentary on what and how Sakura could improve as well as ideas for them to try out.

The rest of their morning session consisted of Itachi valiantly trying to train while Shisui cast low level genjutsus of himself telling Itachi to leave. Itachi dispelled the genjutsus, but Shisui relentlessly recast them, sometimes conjuring up little dancing animals or mini Sasukes berating him to leave. Tiring of Shisui’s antics, Itachi dejectedly sat on the ground and began his stretches, saying that they should call it a day.

“Are you alright? You seemed distracted today—I definitely hit you more than usual,” Sakura said kneeling in front of him, raising a glowing green hand to his chest.

“Thank you—I’m fine,” Itachi responded tiredly. “It’s just that Shisui,” he said harshly, glaring at him over Sakura’s shoulder, kept telling me to leave.”

Alarm bells started ringing in Shisui’s head and he looked incredulously at his cousin. His cousin who sold him out. His decidedly, least favorite cousin. He glared back at Itachi. Shisui flashed his dimples which made Itachi narrow his eyes further.

“Sorry, cousin,” Shisui started. “I’m just absolutely starving and wanted to eat—you know how I am when I want something,” he said, throwing his arms behind his head and wiggling his eyebrows at his cousin.

“Annoying? Irritating? Childish?” Itachi grumbled, causing Sakura to giggle. “Sakura,” Itachi started. “Would you want to go to that new bakery in the North District? I’ve only heard incredible things about their rhubarb ice cream,” Itachi said excitedly, ignoring the way Shisui was pouting and lightly kicking at the ground.

Sakura finished healing Itachi and slowly rose, dusting the dirt from her knees and wiping her hands against her thighs. “Ooh, that sounds really nice, but I should probably get real food before I start on desserts,” Sakura laughed.

Not to be outdone, Shisui stepped beside Sakura. “I agree, let’s get lunch Sakura-sensei,” he chirped while resting his hand against Itachi’s head, who was still sitting down. Scowling, Itachi yanked on Shisui’s arm, making his older cousin stumble, and jabbed the back of his knee. Pleased that Shisui was now sprawled in the dirt, Itachi rose and said, “Well, I’m also going to get sesame cookies,” he sniffed. “Good luck with this,” Itachi said to Sakura, poking an incensed Shisui with his sandal. “And thank you for the coconut oil.”

With that, Itachi gracefully straightened himself out and walked towards the edge of the clearing, waving back at Sakura.

___

Shisui and Sakura made their way towards the main hub of Konoha. Excited to be alone with her, Shisui asked her questions about her last mission and her work at the hospital. He listened intently as she recalled the mission details, chuckling when she complained about the humidity in Waterfall, telling her he completely understood while pointing to his curly hair. She talked animatedly about her research project at the hospital. Although he didn’t understand about seventy five percent of what she was explaining, he nodded dutifully, lips quirking as he watched her excited hand movements as she discussed…molecular interventions through pathogenic mechanisms of neurocristopathies—he thinks.

Humming at the right times and throwing in a “oh, really—what does that mean?” every so often, he basked in her voice. Her voice, Shisui decided, was his favorite sound in the entire universe. Wanting to sit down together, he interrupted her briefly to point at the first restaurant he saw.

“How’s ramen sound, Sakura-sensei?” he asked.

“And that’s why normal and pathological neural crest cells—” Sakura, paused. “Oh, Ichiraku’s is fine. Did you know this is Team 7’s spot?” she asked, heading towards the shop. “We used to eat at Ichiraku’s a few times a week,” she scrunched her nose in distaste, “when we were genin,” she finished.

“Itachi says Sasu-chan always complains about Naruto-kun’s ramen eating habits but I didn’t realize this was your guys’ place of choice,” Shisui chuckled. “Does he know that the stand two streets over also does a killer ramen? A gal needs variety if I recall correctly,” he threw in cheekily. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he continued. “There’s also this other place that has great ambience and incredible food—you should come some time?” he voice rising in speed and pitch at the end of the sentence.

Her step faltering, Sakura looked up at Shisui. “Huh?” she questioned at his word choice, “What is it?”

“My place,” he responded quickly, smiling sunnily at her and ignoring the rush of blood to his face.

Shisui’s heart thundered at the way her mouth opened in surprise and he felt his bones reverberate when the tips of her ears turned pink. While she scrunched her nose at the cheesy line, she couldn’t help the way her lips quirked up.

“Well—”

“SAKURA-CHAN!” Naruto screamed, running towards her from down the street, waving both hands excitedly. Behind Naruto, walking at a leisurely pace, was Itachi and Sasuke. Sending Shisui an apologetic smile, Sakura faced Naruto as he spun her around in a hug.

Exasperated, Shisui watched Itachi amble towards him and sent him a mental middle finger. Looking pleased with himself, Itachi didn’t even try to hide his smirk behind his massive ice cream cone.

“Me and teme ran into Itachi-nii and he said you and Shisui-nii were around here somewhere,” Naruto exclaimed. Turning to acknowledge Shisui he said, “Oh, dude nice pants, your ass looks great in them—let’s all get Ichiraku!” he shouted, grabbing Sakura’s wrist and running towards a waving Teuchi.

Shisui stood alone in the middle of the street with his mouth slightly open. Itachi joined his side while Sasuke trailed after his two teammates, not before assessing Shisui’s shirt and pants and throwing him a grimace.

“Tch,” Sasuke said dismissively.

“You love this don’t you, Itachi.”

“Ah,” he responded. Itachi angled his ice cream towards Shisui and raised a brow.

“No.”

Itachi pouted.

___

Bounding ahead to Ichiraku’s, Naruto pulled the chair against the wall with a flourish, exaggerating a bow and extending his hand towards Sakura. Easily following the mimicry of their genin days, she giggled and pretended to ignore him. Sakura took the seat at the middle of the bar which Sasuke quietly pulled out for her.

Pouting, Naruto complained, “Aw, c’mon Sakura-chan, you don’t actually want to sit next to teme, do you? He asked, easing in the seat to her left.

“It’s so she can mediate when you eventually say something stupid to piss me off,” Sasuke said, distributing the menus.

Sakura punched him in the arm in response and turned to chat about the menu with Naruto. When Shisui and Itachi settled into the wooden seats next to Sasuke, Sakura asked,

“How long are you two in the village for?” leaning towards Shisui and Itachi.

“We’ll both be local for about a week.” Itachi offered, now nibbling delicately at his cone.

“They’ve both been easing back on their ANBU duties and are doing more stuff for the clan,” Sasuke supplied, absentmindedly picking at a paint chip on the counter.

Whooping in response Naruto added, “Hell, yeah!” he threw a fist into the air. “Now you guys can train with us more! And Itachi-nii,” he started, leaning back in his chair to look at Itachi, “if you could bring more of those rice balls you made last time, they were incredible, dattebayo!”

Smiling, Itachi leaned back to discuss snacks with Naruto.

“And what about you, Sakura-sensei,” Shisui asked, completely pushing Sasuke out of the way.

Grumbling, Sasuke pushed back at Shisui, which the elder responded by trapping a hissing Sasuke in a headlock.

Rubbing Sasuke’s head placatingly, Sakura said, “I should be staying in the village for the next week too—there’s a lot of hospital stuff I’ve got to do.” Nodding to Teuchi as he placed her order in front of her, she added, “I’m glad you’ll be in the village this week, we should train together again—if you want,” she fiddled with her wooden chopsticks. “It was great to spar with you and watch you, I learned a lot.”

Jealous that he wasn’t invited to the spar, Sasuke wrenched himself from Shisui’s grasp and aggressively ripped his chopsticks apart. Noting his little brother’s behavior, Itachi chuckled and said, “I just told Naruto I’d stop by your training this week, otouto.”

“Tch,” Sasuke responded. But, the way his shoulders relaxed and he smiled gently into his bowl made it clear he was pleased.

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto started. “I feel like I never see you anymore!” he said between bites of ramen. “Let’s do a Team 7 get together—you, me, teme, Kaka-sensei, Yamato Taichou, and Sai too!” he slurped noisily.

“Yeah you’re right,” Sakura sighed, rubbing the back of her neck. “With all my projects, the hospital, and,” she waved her hands distractedly, “we haven’t hung out in a while.” Frowning lightly she said, “We could do it at my place, but I don’t know if I could fit everyone…” she trailed off.

Sensing the opportunity, Shisui swooped in. “You should invite your friends over, Sasu-chan,” he mockingly admonished.

Ignoring Shisui’s baiting and staring down at his bowl, Sasuke grumbled.

“Absolutely no-“

“Your friends are coming over?” Itachi asked excitedly.

“No-“

“Yes!” chorused Naruto, Sakura, and Shisui.

“They’re,” Sasuke started, pointing his chopsticks at Naruto, “going to make a mess.”

Ignoring Sasuke’s continued rumblings, Itachi started to list off different food and dessert ideas to Naruto who grew more and more excited by his suggestions if his hand waving was anything to go by. Glancing sharply to his right at an extremely pleased Shisui, Sasuke scowled.

“I know you just took advantage of nii-san’s househusband fantasies,” Sasuke whispered sharply. In the background, Itachi was dreamily listing the various courses he thought would best suit Team 7’s tastes while Naruto and Sakura egged him on with ideas of their own.

“I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” Shisui responded smugly, leisurely slurping his noodles.

Irritated, Sasuke leaned across Shisui to talk some sense into his brother, but Itachi was staring serenely into space, using his full genius brain to plan out dinner. Huffing, Sasuke hunched in his seat and poked dejectedly at his noodles, missing the way Sakura peered past him.

___

Dinner at the Uchiha household was scheduled that Friday—a few days after lunch at Ichiraku’s. Shisui, conscious to not make another questionable fashion choice, opted for black training pants and a traditional Uchiha top—short sleeved and high collared with the Uchiha fan embroidered on the back.

Arriving at the head family’s home, he was greeted by a tired looking Fugaku who wearily told Shisui that everyone was in the kitchen. Laughing to himself, Shisui figured that Itachi and Mikoto had ran Fugaku to the ground with dinner preparations. Trailing after his uncle towards the kitchen, he saw Sasuke tending to a flower bouquet.

“Why are you here?” Sasuke asked, incensed.

He ignored the venom in his younger cousin’s eyes since he didn’t look very intimidating with carnations in hand. Shisui presented a tin-foil covered pan.

“He made shokupan,” Itachi said breezily.

“They should be here any minute! Sasuke, Fugaku, go set the table and get the plum wine out of the fridge,” Mikoto ordered, putting last minute touches on the pastries she and Itachi were decorating.

In a few minutes, there was knocking at the front door and Itachi went out to greet Sakura and Naruto.

“Come on in,” Itachi said happily. Leading them inside he said, “I ran to the store earlier today and got everyone slippers,” pointing to the neat row along the wall.

“Wow, Itachi-nii. You really got this mom thing down,” Naruto noted, nodding to himself.

“You think?” Itachi smiled serenely and Sakura giggled at his pastel yellow apron with white trimming.

“No one else could make it today,” Sakura said frowning. Handing a wrapped plant to Itachi she said, “Yamato Taichou and Sai are out on a mission, Kakashi said he was…busy…” she trailed off.

Humming to himself while inspecting the healthy green leaves of the plant and the tasteful wrapping, Itachi said, “Sakura, you really didn’t have to.” But the pleased look on his face said otherwise.

“Hey! I helped too!” Naruto interrupted loudly.

___

Settling himself at the low dining room table, Fugaku sat at the head of the table. To his right was Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke. To his left sat Mikoto, Itachi, and Shisui.

“Wow, everything looks incredible,” Sakura gushed at the spread.

Naruto nodded enthusiastically, eyes gleaming. “Mikoto oba-chan, Itachi-nii, you guys really out did yourselves!”

“I helped too, dobe,” Sasuke grumbled.

“I made the shokupan!” Shisui chirruped.

It was a little too much food for the seven of them, Shisui noted. He looked down to the heaping bowl of white rice in front of him with a hearty serving of stew to its right—steam still emanating from both. Each person also had an individual portion of teriyaki salmon, its sweet glaze reflecting the dining room light above them. Sat on the middle of the traditional table, Itachi and Mikoto also prepared stir fried vegetables, soba salad, fried tonkatsu, mapo tofu, and tempura on large serving plates. The dishes took every space of the dining room table, some of it teetering dangerously close to an edge—the table overflowed with intermingling spices and glistening sauces.

Shisui blanched knowing that dessert was bound to be a similarly overwhelming experience.

Saying a brief thanks to his guests, Fugaku uttered a brief, “Itadakimasu,” and began eating.

___

Between the passing of dishes, clinking of chopsticks, and hums of pleasure, easy chatter filled the room.

“Thank you for the coconut oil dear, it works so well,” Mikoto smiled at Sakura over her glass of wine.

Dabbing her lips delicately after devouring several slices of tofu, Sakura shook her head.

“It was no problem—thank you,” she said, looking at Mikoto and Itachi, “for the dumplings. I ate them all in one sitting they were incredible,” she gushed.

Sasuke grumbled beside her, saying he had helped too and that it shouldn’t be physically possible to consume that many dumplings at once, but his mother cut him off.

“I heard we have Hyuuga Neji-kun to thank for the hair tips?” Mikoto teased.

At the mention of Neji, Shisui slowed his chewing and conceded defeat to Naruto, who was not-so-subtly trying to eat all of the tempura as quickly as possible. Shisui looked discreetly at Sakura to see how she would respond.

Sakura was caught by surprise at the comment and her spoon hovered in midair for a millisecond. Processing the joke, her shoulders shook lightly as she giggled and playfully rolled her eyes.

Naruto, with a mouthful of food said, “Neji does have nice hair, ‘ttebayo.”

Choking a little when Sasuke elbowed him in the stomach he stuttered, “A-ah, not as nice as yours, Sakura-chan!” The table laughed at the duo in response.

“Itachi-nii, you should quit ANBU and become a cook, this is the best food I’ve had in forever,” Naruto said dreamily.

Fugaku frowned deeply into his wine. “Yes, Itachi, when will you quit ANBU and fully take on your duties as clan head?”

Fugaku’s shoulder length brown hair had streaks of gray in it, which Mikoto lovingly said made him look refined although she had hardly aged in the past five years. His face showed years of exhaustion and responsibilities with his heavy brow and fine lines at the side of his mouth. His hands were still rough and battle worn despite it being years since his active duty days. Despite it all, his eyes were still keen, sharp as flint, and just as dark.

The rest of the table stilled with Fugaku’s displeasure—the Uchihas either frowning at Fugaku or throwing Itachi an apologetic glance. Sakura and Naruto ate impossibly quicker.

“Well Father,” Itachi started breezily, taking a languid sip of his glass. “You still have life in you yet.”

Preparing for an even more disgruntled Fugaku, Naruto and Sakura nervously chattered about the incredible food, piling each other’s plates even higher, and Shisui off handedly wondered if Sasuke had ever mentioned that Sakura’s appetite matched Naruto’s.

Surprising his guests, Fugaku wearily sighed into his rice bowl. “Son, please put me out of my misery so I can spend time with my wife.”

Over Mikoto’s pleased giggles and Sasuke’s embarrassed choke, Sakura and Naruto stopped their babbling to stare openly at Fugaku. Realizing that their surprise was obvious, they busied themselves again with food, ignoring Sasuke’s second-hand disgust.

“And Shisui,” Fugaku said sharply, cutting off whatever sly retort he had prepared on the tip of his tongue, “when will you fully accept the mantle as the police force commander?” he questioned.

Ignoring Shisui’s attempt at a response, Fugaku braced his hands on the floor behind his back and looked up at the ceiling. “Why Itachi and Sasuke don’t want to take over the police force is beyond me,” he muttered to himself as Mikoto gently consoled him.

Laughing at his uncle’s tiredness Shisui joked, “Well oji-san, given that Itachi’s biggest dream is being a full-time househusband—” Naruto looked incredibly interested at this prospect. “—and mine is living on oba-san’s food for the rest of my life,” Sasuke rolled his eyes at this. “Maybe we’ll make you suffer a little longer.”

Shisui raised his glass to Itachi, who clinked his glass in return, happily sipping the plum wine at the expense of an entirely spent Fugaku who mumbled to himself about shattered retirement dreams.

___

After dinner, Naruto and Sakura helped clear out the dishes despite Mikoto and Itachi’s protests. While Sasuke and Fugaku were relegated to cleaning the dishes, Shisui prepared the tea while Mikoto and Itachi set the table with dessert.

Surprisingly, dessert wasn’t as overwhelming as Shisui thought it would be. There was sakuramochi at the center of the table, elegantly plated in a neat line on a porcelain plate, the pickled blossom leaf folded meticulously over each cake. Itachi’s eyes crinkled towards Sakura while setting it down. Mikoto placed the higashi towards the end of the table, near Sasuke’s seat. The biscuit-like sweet, Shisui noticed amusedly, had uzumaki swirls pressed onto each biscuit. Shisui’s shokupan was also set down alongside a small pot of honey and jam. The last dessert was Fugaku’s favorite: butter cookies. Each cookie was a perfect circle and slightly browned at the edges. But to Shisui’s increased amusement, a black, three-tomoe sharingan was stenciled in icing on each cookie.

Settling back at the table, Sasuke looked at each dessert in growing exasperation before taking in the sharingan butter cookies. He glanced at Itachi in thinly veiled disbelief, but Itachi was intently staring at his guests’ reactions.

Sakura and Naruto had expressions of awe on their face. Naruto, with one hand on his protruding stomach looked a little nauseous when he said, “Wow…you really went all out on this team dinner…it looks so good dattebayo,” he finished weakly.

Sakura, trying to make up for her teammate’s lack of gusto quickly chirped, “I’m SO impressed with your icing skills,” she gushed, “I tried once and it was a complete failure,” she pouted, running a hand through her ponytail. “I’m so full from that incredible dinner but we’ll,” she quickly darted her eyes to Naruto, “make sure and try everything,” she finished, silencing Naruto’s protests.

As Itachi went prattled on the fine details of piping, not icing, because they’re obviously very different, Shisui idly wondered if Sasuke never hosted team dinners because of Itachi.

___

As everyone forced themselves to eat as much dessert as possible for Itachi’s sake, at the head of the table, Mikoto was cajoling her husband in hushed tones and nudging him with her shoulder.

“Sakura dear,” Mikoto started, which silenced the rest of the table. Mikoto turned her head to her husband. He responded by straightening his back and clearing his throat a few times.

“Sakura,” he started stiffly, not quite looking her in the eye. “Thank you,” Fugaku said, “for your work with the clan medics.

Shisui looked at his uncle, then Sakura in surprise—he hadn’t known just how close she was to the Uchiha clan. Looking around the table, no one else seemed to be surprised with her work, more so surprised at Fugaku’s thanks.

Sakura smiled kindly at Fugaku and Mikoto. “You’re welcome, the sharingans a tricky kekkai genkai and the blockages in the delicate blood vessels are definitely hard to work with, but working with Sasuke and Kakashi gave me a leg up. I’m just happy you allowed me to treat your clan members and train your clan medics.”

“With your instruction, Sakura-chan,” Mikoto began, “nearly every clan member has noted a mental and physical improvement. The Uchiha owe you a life debt.” Fugaku, Itachi, and Sasuke nodded in agreement.

Blushing at the compliment, Sakura shook her head. “Thank you, but you all don’t owe me anything. The payment, as agreed, was fully enough.”

Shisui paused. He hadn’t realized that Sakura had found a way to ease the pain the sharingan brought. Having awoken his mangekyo at an extremely young age, he was used to the near perpetual eyestrain and frequent migraines that came with overuse. He had given up on his clan medics’ treatment for his eyes since they’d been ineffective over the years. Incredibly interested at the prospect of relieving his pain he quickly turned to Sakura.

She was still talking to Fugaku and Mikoto, trying to convince them that they didn’t have to commit to any favors for her, and all of his thoughts stilled. She was talking with her hands, trying to explain that she was just glad to be of service to her teammate’s family, and by extension, the village. That no one should be in chronic pain if there was anything she could do about it. Her cheeks were flushed with the wine, and he was taken by the fullness of her lips. Wet with the plum wine, they glistened in the soft overhead light. Every so often, he could see a glint of her pink tongue as she laughed, or caught the corner of her lip.

Noticing that Itachi was staring at him with amusement, Shisui mentally shook himself out of his stupor.

“Ne, Sakura-sensei, I hadn’t realized you figured out the sharingan. Any chance I could schedule a doctor’s appointment with you?” He smiled cheekily at her, ignoring the way Sasuke and Naruto threw daggers at him.

“See, Sakura-chan,” Mikoto said, “you take such good care of our boys—no matter what you say, we’ll always be in you debt.”

“Mikoto-san—” Sakura looked down at her shirt—a standard issue jounin top—which now had a dark wine stain blooming at her stomach.

Naruto looked sheepishly at her, grabbing his napkin. “Sorry…at least it wasn’t your kimono this time?” Naruto said as he dabbed.

“Aw man,” Sakura complained, “this is one of my last good ones too.” While it was customary for shinobi to keep one or two sets of pristine uniforms for show—if they were on guard duty for a prestigious client, or to maintain appearances for foreign dignitaries—the reality was that most shinobi were running around in repeatedly stained, slightly tattered, hole riddled uniforms until they were unwearable.

Getting up to rinse her shirt in the sink, Mikoto stopped her. “Let me get you something to change into,” she said, rising from her seat. At the same time, Sasuke stood up, saying he’d get something of his, and missed the way Shisui had grabbed the back of his own shirt collar and started to undress. Itachi yanked the hem of Shisui’s shirt down and Fugaku stared at Shisui like he was stupid.

“No, no, sit back down Sasuke,” Mikoto said quickly, “look how pretty Sakura’s hair is today,” gesturing at her pink locks, “I’ll have to get her something of mine.” Mikoto placed a hand at Sakura’s upper back and ushered her along.

Sitting back down, Sasuke stared after his mom and teammate in silent confusion over the correlation of Sakura’s everyday pony tail and clothes.

After a few minutes, Mikoto and Sakura shuffled back into the main dining area. Mikoto walked slightly behind Sakura, staring intently at her sons’ and nephew’s faces. Catching the glint in her eye, Fugaku sighed.

Sakura changed into a loose black sweater with an Uchiha fan stitched on the breast. The sweater itself had a similar cut to the jounin top, and was slightly loose on Sakura’s frame. Seeing his teammate, Sasuke furrowed his brow. He had several shirts exactly like that. Sakura also probably had several shirts like that—it wasn’t particularly nice even—why did it have to be his mother’s, he wondered. What does it have to do with her hair—did ponytails have some significance he hadn’t known about? Deep in thought, he continued to scrutinize while Itachi happily munched on butter cookies. Glancing nonchalantly at Sakura he offered a “Hm,” and went back to cajoling Naruto into eating more.

Shisui was gone. The thought of Sakura wearing his clothes with the Uchiha fan would be forever branded in memory. He imagined quiet mornings with her as he made her coffee as she got ready in the mornings. He imagined how she’d look wearing one of his t-shirts—the oversized fit exposing the cream of her shoulder and him kissing the open space.

He watched her as she spoke. The slender curve of her neck, the peach fuzz on her cheeks, and the irresistible plumpness of her lips mesmerized him. Shisui felt the rush of chakra to his eyes, activating his sharingan, and quickly turned his head.

“Thank you for the meal,” Sakura said, rising from her seat, bowing to Mikoto and Itachi.

“Yeah, dinner was great thank you so much!” Naruto chimed in. “Ne, ne, Sakura-chan,” leaning towards her with a glint in his eyes, “why don’t you stay and sleepover! It’ll be like our genin days!” Naruto cheered.

Lightly grimacing, Sakura responded, “I have a shift at the hospital at six in the morning—maybe next time,” she apologized, although she didn’t look sorry at all.

“It must be exhausting having multiple full time jobs,” Itachi said sagely, still munching on butter cookies.

“Yes.” Fugaku deadpanned. “I wonder.”

Completely ignoring his father, Sasuke got up and heaved Naruto with him as well. Nodding to his mother, he jutted his chin to Sakura then jerked his head at the door.

“God, teme—use your words!” Naruto yelled, swatting the back of Sasuke’s head. Ducking before Naruto could hit him, Sasuke jabbed the side of Naruto’s stomach, grinning when he doubled over and wheezed. “W-we’re gonna walk S-Sakura-chan home,” he managed to get out, glaring at Sasuke from his hunched over position.

Seeing his chance, Shisui shot up from his seat and clapped a heavy hand onto Naruto’s back, forcing the blonde to stay hunched over. Cheerfully he said, “I’ll do it! My apartment’s on the way anyways and you’re staying here!” Squeezing Sasuke’s shoulder forcefully, Shisui grinned at his younger cousin trying not to flinch in his vice grip.

Raising a brow, Sakura looked at Shisui unimpressed, although the corner of her lip was curling. Itachi mirrored Sakura, except he was actually unimpressed. Fugaku massaged his nose bridge and his wife hid her smile behind her hand.

“Sasuke, Naruto, come help with the dishes,” Mikoto said.

Sakura gave once last bow to Sasuke’s parents and waved at her friends before heading out.

___

Sakura’s apartment was not on the way to Shisui’s. In fact, it was on the opposite side of the village.

But, there was no way he’d miss the opportunity to talk to her one-on-one without the intrusion of pesky teammates or baby cousins. They walked leisurely side by side, shoulders occasionally bumping, as he basked in her undivided attention. The walk to her apartment was made in quiet tones, careful not to break the stillness that surrounded them.

Crickets chirping in the background and the moon softly illuminating their way, Shisui, for the first time with Sakura, felt at ease. He wondered if maybe they were meant for this—quiet conversations under the moonlight, with her wearing the Uchiha crest.

[pla-teau]

WHATTHEFUCK WANDAVISION EPISODE 5

SPOILERS AHEAD, YOU’VE BEEN WARNED

GIFS AREN’T MINE

EPISODE 4 THOUGHTS

opening title | right off the bat, the paintbrush is surrounded by wanda’s powers. this adds to the assumption that wanda is the mastermind behind all that is happening with westview. could mean nothing but i just find that little detail interesting. also, in the recap, in the quick moment in episode 3, we see another variation of the scene when vision asks wanda where geraldine went. she says “she’s gone. she didn’t belong here.” i feel like in recaps to come, we’ll see slight variations of past scenes to indicate that the reality in westview is breaking or just to show the actual words exchanged during the altered scene. wanda is the one broadcasting and chooses what audiences can and cannot see so maybe this is the original cut of the scene that we nor SWORD saw in the broadcast.

agnes | first off, agnes breaks character for a second like an actress who screws up and so everyone has to do a retake. when she says to wanda that she wants her to hold the kids, wanda is even confused for a second. she looks to her like she’s the one in charge. i think she did this on purpose since vision went off script as well in not letting agnes hold the boys. even though there’s footage in the 90s episode that she’s also being controlled by wanda when vision pulls her out of the trance, i still think she’s working with the main bad guy to hurt wanda. she doesn’t seem to react when the boys age up twice in front of her, always making a witty and funny comment.

wanda’s a terrorist | the way hayward quickly labeled wanda as a terrorist makes me think that there’s ulterior motives with this dude. didn’t want to believe it but marvel has put me in a habit of assuming guys in suits have sinister agendas. while jimmy woo gives a brief rundown of wanda’s life, hayward is quick to focus on the negative aspect because she’s a criminal with the sokovia accords still in place. he seems to be the only one driving this idea forward just because he’s the acting director of SWORD. he even put a damn missile on the retro drone monica controlled to get inside the anomaly. as acting director, he would know that a missile is useless against an avenger with wanda’s powers. i believe that he knew that missile wouldn’t do anything to wanda and the sole purpose was to antagonize her to continue painting her as the sole mastermind behind westview. i think he’s just trying to shift the blame from SWORD to wanda now that she possesses the body that can be used to create more weapons etc. etc.

vision’s body | so that scene we saw in the sneak peek was indeed footage of wanda stealing vision’s body and that SWORD was in possession of it. with monica saying in the previous episode that SWORD doesn’t do creation and hayward saying they’re focusing on robotics etc., it makes SWORD also v hypocritical because the brief footage we see of him - he’s dismembered. it doesn’t take much to assume that SWORD was most likely using vision’s body towards their robotics, nanotech and AI projects.

lagos commercial | clearly this is in reference to wanda’s accidental killing of innocent lives after trying to protect steve from crossbones in civil war. the saying “for when you make a mess you didn’t mean to” at the end makes me disagree more on haydick hayward’s assumption that she’s a terrorist. i like how they used this as a paper towel commercial as after lagos, the sokovia accords were written. for me, the paper towel represents the actual accords since they’re drafted on paper, right? how do we clean up any mess in the real world? with laws and regulations being written and enforced aka a piece of paper.

norm’s moment of consciousness | norm is granted a moment of consciousness by vision and is quickly hysterical. his statements about how vision has to stop and get her out of his head has me split. on one hand, he could be talking about wanda since monica said the same thing in her recounting of the events in the anomaly. but i also think it’s agnes or someone else who’s just disguising themselves as wanda (her emotions, grief, etc) to get everyone to see wanda as the bad guy (again).

SWORD computer message | how was the westview reality able to see this message by SWORD? it didn’t have much detail and only the basic rundown of what was going on but it’s interesting to see that message be ‘intercepted’ by the hex. we didn’t see from the outside that they were trying to communicate with wanda or someone within the town. it was also weird how the whole staff read it together at once - very creepy and raises more questions than answers.

“you can fix the dead” | tommy’s comment to wanda when sparky passes away. clearly the only dead one is vision in wanda’s world even though he appears very much alive in westview. i don’t think even wanda knows the true extent of her powers if she is the main perpetrator in all of this. i’ve also seen people mention that maybe the death of sparky is meant to push wanda to unlock that power if she has the ability to bring back the dead.

wanda and vision arguing | from the get go, we’re seeing vision going off script because he’s piecing things together. he notices how agnes always comes in to save the day or with something the couple needs. i like that we’re seeing the pair fight because they haven’t been on the same page arguably since episode 3 which was the last time we saw wanda edit an episode.

“you’ve never talked to me like this before” | wanda to vision. as i’ve said before, the show is really making vision seem more of the human one of the couple even being supposedly dead. what wanda says is true, we’ve never seen vision so much as raise his voice at wanda. in the past, before westview, vision always tread lightly around wanda and thought about how to word news of something she may not react well to. he’s always been calculating and thoughtful in his approach to wanda. even when she shoved him down however deep into the ground to leave the avengers facility in civil war, vision didn’t yell at her when they fought. it’s been nothing but love that vision has communicated to wanda. now with his clear frustration of the situation and evidence, it’s understandable that he’s yelling at her. it’s human to assume and jump to the worst conclusion about someone. he’s becoming more human in being upset and frustrated with someone he cares for that looks like the bad guy and victimizer of a whole town and seemingly controlling him and making decisions for him. i really hope he doesn’t get killed off at the end because i’m truly loving vision’s growth and range throughout the series.

“i can’t remember my life before westview” | this speaks to vision’s physical state. i think he’s not fully dead but because he doesn’t have the mind stone. every iteration we’ve seen of vision in the mcu has been with the stone since 2015. he doesn’t remember his creation or his death in 2018. the last 8 years are a blank for vision and understandably so, he’s upset and frustrated at the situation and at wanda. maybe it’s because he’s in the hex and maybe once outside, he’ll remember or somehow recount what’s happened? again, i hope he doesn’t just die once he gets out of the hex.

pietro’s ‘recast’ | the most shocking part of this episode that made me choke on my water and feel 50 different emotions in a matter of seconds. anyways, i think wanda damn well knows that it isn’t the brother she lost. i think she pieces it together that he is pietro but just not her world’s pietro like she feels some sort of connection to this pietro (if that makes any sense)? love that this brings in the multiverse into the mcu. i am still was holding my breath for aaron taylor-johnson but seeing evan peters’ peter was a fun surprise. in rewatching, the episode sets this surprise cameo up with billy and tommy asking her about pietro and this reoccurring theme that ‘family is forever’. i think that either wanda doesn’t realize her powers and her life in westview is bringing in people from other universes or that whoever is behind all of this is giving wanda one more reason to stay in westview since vision is starting to go off script and can’t be controlled by wanda anymore.

long lost bro | the fact he says this makes me curious as to whether this truly is peter from the x-men universe or if whoever is orchestrating this is just using peter’s body to manipulate wanda and play along in her ‘show’. if it’s truly peter that’s been plucked from the x-men universe, maybe he’s given this knowledge or whoever is controlling him is planting that information in his brain so he can say that he’s wanda’s long lost brother which he technically is. there’s also been people pointing out that in the mirror behind wanda looks distorted when you look, you would be able to see peter and wanda’s in the reflection. it looks unreal and this could be a key to seeing the reality of what’s happening in westview, maybe hopefully this’ll be a key to opening wanda’s eyes that something clearly isn’t right.

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - No Time Like the Past

While I wouldn’t call this the worst episode of the series, there are several others I dislike more, I would call this the most ill conceived story in the show. 

All the other bad episodes have potential but are let down by poor presentation, boring predictability, or sloppy planning. This one however, is fundamentally flawed in it’s very basic premise and so ranks in the bottom of most fans lists. Even people who are far more forgiving of season three and than I am, and are hardcore New Dream stans, still dislike this episode. That’s how bad it is. 

Summary: Rapunzel discovers Old Lady Crowley tossing out Cassandra's things. She is upset and demands that they be left alone. She then has Lance and Eugene help her save all of Cassandra's mementos and personal belongings, but she becomes saddened when Eugene reminds her that Cassandra turned her back on "her". Rapunzel takes a box of her things along with, unknowingly, a mysterious hourglass. As she examines it, she accidentally drops and smashes it and she and Pascal find themselves sent back into the past. They run into a teenage Eugene and Lance who keep calling Rapunzel "Sideburns". Rapunzel realizes that she and Pascal have inhabited the bodies of the Stabbington Brothers and decide to recruit the young thieves in getting the hourglass from the castle back.

Fun Fact! That Dummy is Rapunzel’s Doing 

Minor nitpick here, but Cass had nothing to do with putting Eugene’s face on her sparring dummy. Rapunzel voluntarily did that back in Under Raps. Cas never requested it nor even expressed any joy over receiving said ‘gift’. 

Basically the show is attributing one of Rapunzel’s mistakes/flaws to Cassandra in order to introduce a very nonsensical plot point later. So I need ya’ll to keep that in mind as we go along.  

Lets Talk About the Episode’s Ordering 

We don't have production codes for season three like we did for the previous two seasons. So we can’t know for sure what order everything was originally planned in, but I would argue that this episode should have came before Return of the King. 

For starters this is a “bottle” episode; it takes place mostly in the past and the only present day characters who show up are Eugene, Raps, Lance, and Crowely. As such you could potentially slot this episode in anywhere before Cassandra’s Revenge. You can’t really do that with most of the other episodes so it could have been easily moved around when airing. 

Therefore, I would argue that it should have been the first episode after Rapunzel’s Return for three key reasons. 

It would have given Edmund time to travel to Corona and give Raps time to start up big building projects like fixing Old Corona. In fact she’s already approving building plans for the capitol city at the start of the episode. Which could even explain why she took so long getting to the castle repairs if she was taking care of the stuff that the Saporians messed up else where.  

Rapunzel’s stance over wanting to keep Cassandra’s things makes more sense early on, both in universe and in a meta context. Raps would still have hope if Cass has only been gone for a month or two instead what would now be four or five months down the line. It also makes sense that Crowely wouldn’t wait around for that long. And from a meta standpoint, the audience would still be oblivious to what the heck Cass was up to and could theoretically side with Raps better; or at least empathize with her view point more, even while disagreeing with her. 

Events in this episode better explains Eugene’s decisions in Return of the King and gives the audience more context for certain stuff.  

So Why Is There a Random Magical Time Traveling Hourglass in the Storage Vault?

Slowly but surely the series has abandoned all pretense that there’s any logical world building in the show. Magical things just appear randomly now without any explanation whatsoever. Worse than that, things like the hourglass and map to the cursed tomb are treated as if they were always there, unlike the magical beings that they happened to run into in past seasons. 

The problem with this is a lack of consistency. You can’t have sceptics like Eugene and Varian if magic is so common and wide spread that anyone can run into it at anytime. Not to mention it diminishes the specialness and importance of the sundrop and moonstone if powerful magical items can be so easily found and stirred, undermining important plot points and the tension surrounding them. 

But most frustrating of all, is that this could have been easily fixed by just stating on screen at some point that magic attracts other magic. Meaning it’s only Rapunzel herself who routinely runs into these things and not just everybody and anybody. 

None of This Stuff Holds Any Meaning

Show don’t tell!

At several points through out season three, both Raps and Cass morn over Cassandra’s left behind things. They tell us constantly that these objects hold significant meaning to them, but I, the viewer, have no damn clue as to why. 

We were never shown on screen what was so special about these things other than the fact that it was junk Cass collected. There’s no story attacked to these assortment of objects nor any previous indication that Cassandra valued them beyond their usefulness. As such, any scenes involving her stuff fall emotionally flat. 

Eugene is the One in the Right Here. 

Eugene’s right. 

Any well adjust and mature adult will tell you he’s right. 

If someone doesn’t want a relationship with you, than that’s it. There is nothing you can do but to move on. It sucks, but its life. To ignore that is to ignore someone else’s boundaries and personal autonomy; while also devaluing yourself and you’re own needs. 

In a competent show this would be a set up for Rapunzel to learn something about letting go and taking care of oneself emotionally. 

But this isn’t a competent show. 

But Lobster is for Poor Folk

Food history time!

Lobster, and shellfish in general, have been considered low class food for centuries. Especially around costal areas like Corona. It’s easy to attain, cheap, and not regulated like hunting was in much of Europe. In America, specifically, lobster was fed to prisoners and there’s historical accounts of riots being started over it.  

Heck, less than forty years ago, no one lived on the coast but poor people. That’s why there’s historical communities of black people living on the southeastern islands in the US and why my father grew up in the swamps of Alabama during the 50s and 60s. 

The gentrification of coastal property and seafood, like lobster, is a very recent phenomenon in human history, starting in the late 70s early 80s with the booming tourism industry and increasing globalization.   

So while I understand that the joke here is meant to be reflective of our current understanding of lobster being a status symbol, in universe, it’s the equivalent of Eugene getting excited for chicken nuggets instead of his usual bowl of cereal because the story takes place before the 20th century.  

This means that these kids are so poor that fucking mcdonald’s fast food would be considered a rare treat compared to the slop they usually eat. Yet again what is meant to be a lighthearted joke turns suddenly dark when you stop to think about it for all of two seconds all because the writers are so flippant about their world and characters. 

This Wasn’t Planned Out, So the Timeline Doesn’t Add Up Anymore and Resources are Wasted

Remember the flashback in The Return of Strongbow?

Now I need you to remember that season three is two years later from season one and the movie. Eight years ago then, would be ten years ago now. 

The Eugene and Lance in the bottom picture is suppose to be roughly the same age as the Eugene and Lance in the top picture; give or take a few months. 

I know teenage boys can grow fast, but not that fast. 

Eugene at 16 looks the same as he does at 26. All because the writers were too lazy to preplan things out ahead of time. 

We should have seen the teen models with recasted voices back during that first flashback if they were going to tell this story later. Or the previous plot point should have been less than eight years ago. 

In fact the first flashback no longer makes any sense being so many years ago given Eugene’s engagement and recent breakup with Stalyan, and the later reveal that he was working for the Baron during the original movie. 

Sloppy planning like this not only makes for a confusing timeline but it also wastes limited resources. I like the new models, I like the actors cast for these younger roles, and I do like the concept of seeing more of Eugene’s past. But going through all of that trouble and money for what amounts to one throw away episode is mismanagement of the budget and work schedule.  

Baby Varian Is the Episode’s Only Saving Grace 

I know people are divided on the deign here. Some love it and some hate it, but that’s a personal taste thing. The actual scene itself is golden either way, because it’s such a funny eater egg. Fans on both sides made memes out of this for days. It’s legendary. 

Personally I’m more in the ‘love it’ camp, though I can see the issues people have with the design. My main defense of it is more the fact that we got kid designs for the other OCs in the show and it’s only fair Varian got one as well. The fact that he’s in smaller versions of the S1 clothes doesn’t bother me anymore than when Lance ran around for two seasons in the same outfit, including when he was a kid. 

So if I like it, then why am I talking about it a salt review? 

Cause the most memorable part of an episode shouldn’t be a throw away gag! 

People bring up baby Varian way more than they do about anything else in the episode, and no it’s not just because the character popular. It’s because most would like to forget what comes after this scene. 

Where is Quirin, by the Way?

Why is your six year old son running around the big city unsupervised?

This wouldn’t get talk about as much it wasn’t for the fact that Quirin being neglectful in season one was a motivating factor in his conflict with Varian. A conflict that was suppose to be resolved back in Rapunzel’s Return but we the audience have yet to visually see any difference in behavior since then.  

Quirin’s absence here in the past highlights his absence in the present day and reminds the audience aware that we’ve not been given a satisfying conclusion to one of the most important arcs in the series.  

Lets Talk About Wasted Potential 

Like I said, I like the idea of exploring Eugene’s past. But we should have gotten that back in season two when it was more relevant. Part of why this episode fails is because Eugene has reached the end of his original character development. He’s now on an identity crisis arc which has nothing to do with this episode.  

But you know who still hasn’t finished developing? Rapunzel. 

Rapunzel has lots to still learn and viewing her past through outside eyes could have turned this story into something really special. Especially with the ‘inhabiting another body’ plot point. 

You have no end of options here, 

Have Raps inhabit Cassandra’s body for a day and gain insight into what motivates her. It could have been either before or after they met, both offers up possibilities. 

Have Raps inhabit Eugene’s body and experience what he had to deal with growing up and come to see his point of view. (This could have also worked with the Sabbingtons set up had the writers not been stupid.) 

And my personal favorite, send her back to right after Queen for a Day and have her stuck in either Varian’s or Ruddiger’s bodies. Force her to see what she did to him and have her acknowledge she was wrong. 

And those are just the most obvious choices, there’s other more out of left field things you can do that would still work with good writing. Like exploring Lady Caine’s past, inhabiting Arianna’s body and learning how to be a real queen, get dumped into actual young Gothel and lay out clues to the future Zhan Tiri plot, or possess one of the Brotherhood and experience the final days of the Dark Kingdom; the list just goes on and on and on. 

But I Thought You Didn’t Put Kids in Jail Frederic?

Remember that Raps and Pascal are possessing the Stabbingtons who are still teenagers here. They can’t be much older than Varian. 

This means that Varian isn’t some special case. Teens have received harsh and deadly punishments in the past for non-violent crimes like theft. 

Also teens are called kids still by the majority of the cast. They’re aren’t considered adults with the same rights as someone in say their twenties, yet they can be punished the same as an adult would. Which is horrendous in any time period. 

So in conclusion, Frederic is a fucking liar! 

Tangled the Series can’t decide if it’s in the far past or a reflection of the modern day. As such it winds up supporting the worst of both worlds. Barbaric practices like hanging for minor crimes and prison slave labor are treated as the norm and never called out for the horrific things that they are; treated as a joke even, but we’re suppose to accept that this world also somehow views adolescence through the lens of late 20th century sensibilities even as it forces minors to go through such atrocities. 

Like what are you trying to say show? What is your message on the transition of adolescence to adulthood regarding rights and responsibilities? And don’t tell me ‘it’s not that deep’ because this is suppose to be a coming of age show! That’s the entire premise of the series! 

So How Old Are Stan and Pete Again?

I was always under the impression that Pete was a newbie guard, closer to Cass and Eugene’s age than say Cap or Frederic. That’s why he screws up so much because he’s inexperienced, why he seemed to be the closest thing to a equal colleague Cass had in the guard when she was also just starting out, and why I assumed those braided girls from the movie were his sisters. 

I mean there was nothing on screen previously that would necessarily contradict this reveal, it just doesn’t feel right, that’s all. I guess he could be like 20 here and be 30 in the show. That would make him only a few years older than Eugene, but still doesn’t explain why he’s so useless a decade later. 

I’m fine with Stan being here though. I always thought of him being the older of the two. In fact I headcannon Willow as his mysterious wife that he talked about back in Monty’s episode during season one. (She’s Stan and Pete’s beard, and they’re totally in a open poly relationship. That’s why they’re allowed to stay in the royal guard despite being so incompetent cause they’re technically Ferderic’s in-laws and Rapunzel’s uncles. Just no one ever talks about it cause it’s a minor sandal for a princess to marry lower class and Willow’s hardly ever there.) 

And Why Does Xavier Have All Those Plot McGuffins? 

I know we’ll never get an answer, but at this point Xavier’s exposition fairy powers border upon ridiculousness. It’s just lazy and a waste of character. 

So How Does Time Travel Work In This?

There are three types of time travel stories in fiction. 

First is the ‘Changeable Past, Changeable Future’. You see this in Back to the Future. What you do in the past will change the future, i.e. your present. You may or may not remember that you did it, but be warned you could change things too much and break stuff. Like erasing yourself from existence, or ruining your love life ect. The only way to fix it is to go back in time again and change stuff again. But beware of paradoxes or you may destroy the universe altogether.  

The second is the ‘Alternate Timeline’, where changing things creates new realties and it’s a matter of finding the right reality again. The tv show Sliders is a great example of this. Each new timeline is a different dimension. What you do in one won’t effect your original point of origin, only that particular world. The challenge if often getting home again because the probable diverging timelines are infinite and the changes of getting back are a zillion to one. 

Third is the ‘Closed Time Loop’. No matter what you do nothing will change. The future is inevitable and whatever you do in the past was always meant to happen anyways. Gargoyles handles this really well. You can also have ‘fix points’ where certain important things are set in stone but small things can be changed like in several Doctor Who episodes. Braking a fix point breaks the universe once again, while paradoxes are often the solution rather than the threat. 

So which type of time travel is Tangled dealing with here? 

Scenes like the conversation regarding Pete’s and Stan’s mustache or the ones involving Eugene working on his smolder suggest a closed time loop. Yet the ending to this episode reveals a changed future. Further still the grandfather paradox revolving around the hourglass would make you think an alternate timeline yet, we’ve no indication that anything else changed other then Eugene’s opinions on Cass, and Raps shows no concern about getting back to her original point in time indicating that it actually isn’t another dimension.... so what is it then? 

You don’t have to have a tightly plotted time travel story to have an entertaining piece of media. Endgame is riddled with plot holes and contradicts itself constantly, but what it lacks in coherent plot it makes for with fun characters, emotional story beats, and good pacing that manages to balance the action with the drama while hiding the cracks just enough that you don’t lose immersion. 

Tangled however fails at even this because it gets the character beats so fundamentally wrong.  Like you may dislike where the characters ended up in Endgame, but can’t say that those developments didn’t match the characters’ previous storylines and logical trajectory. Tony finally becomes the selfless hero by committing the ultimate sacrifice, Steve learns self care as a mirror to Tony’s arc as they were always parallels to each other, Bruce learns to accept himself, Thor processes his grief and lets go of the role he was assigned at birth but never truly fit into, and Nat becomes the leader she was destined to be rather than the sidekick.  

What happens to the characters in this episode however makes no sense. 

This is Another Missed Opportunity to Explore Eugene’s Past

The other problem behind the episode is that we don’t actually learn anything new. If you’re going to promise a story focusing on Eugene’s past then I expect to actually glean some new insights. 

We still don’t know why he’s working with Baron or how he fell in/fell out with him, what his relationship with Stalyan is like, how he became so cynical; not just the general basics, like the orphanage, but that point in his life where decided that survival meant giving up his morals and ethics; where did he first learn his better ethics that he originally suppressed (cause it sure as heck wasn’t Rapunzel), and when did he and Lance become separated? 

This are questions that series decides to raise by making allusions to them and building conflicts off of them but never wants to explain the details of where they originated from. It’s super frustrating and wholly unnecessary.  If you didn’t think the story of Eugene’s past worth telling then why did up repeatedly bring it up Chris? 

Why Are You Surprised by This Rapunzel?

Rapunzel you know Eugene’s past. You know what he used to be like. You were literally there in the movie and saw him being an ass before this. You didn’t start to like him until he dropped his guard down in the flooded cave back when you both where about to die. 

You fell in love with him when he showed you his real self and he fell in love with you when you proved that you were accepting of that. You earned each others’ trust. This here; angrily yelling at him and judging him, when you’re already hiding who you really are from him both literally and figuratively, is a breaking of that trust. 

Who the fuck are you any more, Rapunzel? 

Cause you’re not the same character from the movie. You’re not even the same character from season one. But whoever hell you are now, it’s not an improvement I can tell ya that. 

So How Did The Hourglass Go From the Treasury to the Basement Storage, and How Would Raps Know It Was There At This Point and Time?

I’m guessing the implication here is that Crowley put Cass’s stuff in the vault, but like why the fuck would she do that? We’re not talking about a family attic here, but the royal safe. The most heavily guarded room in the castle with the kingdom’s most priceless treasures and antiques. Nothing Cass owned was that valuable.  

Rapunzel Is Full of Shit

Oh let me count the numerous ways in which this whole lecture is stupid. 

Rapunzel left Varian behind. Rapunzel left Varian behind multiple times, including that time he was thrown in jail. She was not a good friend, and no, this is not a case of her learning from her past because not once has she ever admitted that she was wrong to do that. So this scene just makes Raps look like a hypocrite. 

Eugene does not need to relrean a lesson on being a better a person. He did that during the movie and has progressed beyond that point. This ‘lesson’ is a waste of time and a misuse of the characters.

This reframes Rapunzel as being in the right during her argument with older Eugene at the beginning of the episode, even though she’s not. In fact this is such a counterintuitive plot point that it boggles the mind. Who structures a narrative this way? Why so blatantly point out how the main character is wrong if not to have her learn something? Why frame the story to make the person who’s personal conflict isn’t even the episode’s focus, into the one who needs to learn something? Especially if that something is already a lesson that they’ve learned on screen beforehand.

And why, oh good heavens why, would you teach children such a toxic message? Like on the surface it sounds like something you’d hear in a children's show, but the context of it is justifying harmful behavior where you selfishly ignore other people’s wishes and boundaries just to satisfy you’re own personal desires.  

And finally, Eugene and Lance do not work as a parallel to Raps and Cass. Cassandra is an adult who left of own free will. Lance is a teenager who was arrested due to Rapunzel’s own actions. Eugene isn’t the one who is responsible here, its Rapunzel. Who also left them both behind in her carelessness. Secondly, Eugene’s decisions are spurned by years of trauma and a healthy fear of dying, while Rapunzel’s is wrapped up in her own need to always be right and to keep her immature and fanciful outlook of the world intact. As harsh as it seems, what Eugene did was based off a predetermine agreement and presumably Lance would have acted the same way or been pressured to act the same way by Eugene. In short, Eugene’s cynical world view as a teen is not the source of his disagreement with Rapunzel but an adult perspective back by common sense and a respect of others choices. It makes no sense for present day Eugene to ‘learn’ anything from this misadventure that he didn’t already know and for Rapunzel to not learn anything that would actually tie the parallel together. 

Locking Another Teen Inside a Jail Cell With Another Adult as a Joke, Does Not Erase the Inappropriateness of Varian’s Story

The episode tries to add another joke about Shorty sneaking into the prison without the guard knowing, but that still doesn’t excuse the fact someone had to have tossed Lance in there with him on purpose. Otherwise Lance wouldn’t have assumed Shorty was a fellow prisoner if he or the guard that locked him up saw Shorty sneak in before then. 

Furthermore Lance’s nonchalant response suggests this is not an out of the ordinary occurrence. Nor do any of the other guard comment upon the irregularly of teens being jailed with an adult. Now add in the fact that the show fails to clarify that previous ‘cellmate’ line from Rapunzel’s Return and now gives us more confirmation that Varian was underfed and malnourished for a year with that gruel joke and you have a horrifying picture. 

Shorty might be non-threating, but that doesn’t mean Andrew, a known attempted murderer and manipulator, is too. Nor any other adult who previously was housed with a teen before then. This is still very much not okay and no amount of ‘jokes’ will suddenly make it right.  

Raps, Who is an Adult, Just Physically Threatened Two Teenaged Boys and It’s Played as a Joke.... 

How many times do I have to say it? Humor does not fix bad writing. I’m not laughing when a heroine at age 20, threatens a couple of kids for merely annoying her. Especially when said heroine has a history of abusing children; because let me repeat once again, neglect is abuse!

This is a Lie

No you wont. 

Rapunzel never tells Eugene what happens on screen. I suspect that if she ever did, they would no longer be together, because what she wound up doing here was a violation of trust and boundaries in the worst possible way.  

And This is Now a Time Paradox 

A Grandfather Paradox to be specific. How can Rapunzel be here in the past to break the hourglass if the hourglass that sent her here is broken? 

In a competent series this would be the point of a future conflict and not the actual resolution. It’s not a closed time loop because of the paradox and the changes we’ll see in the future. 

So either she’s in an alternate timeline/dimension and just doesn’t gives a shit; leaving the real Eugene, Lance, Cass, ect. to go on without her; or she’s just broke the universe and everything is slowly unraveling around her; galaxies are dying as she whines about being dumped, people in the future are being eased from existence, and God is cursing her name for ruining his creation, all the while she carries on oblivious to the destruction in her wake, as usual. 

That’s it. Those are you’re only two options now. Is everyone from here on a fake copy or is Rapunzel the damned destroyer of worlds? You decide. 

So This Confirms That the Stabbingtons are Indeed “Family”

Another reason why I place this before Return of the King; it explains why Eugene considers the Stabbingtons ‘family’. Though if it was Rapunzel he actually bonded with and not the real Sideburns, then how much of his feelings are real and how much of them were fabricated by her? How much agency did this episode steal from him?

So What Exactly Did We All Change?

Well the dummy no longer has Eugene’s face, but Cass’s painting of the three of them still has him ripped out of the photo, soo... Keeping in mind that Raps painted the dummy anyways and considering that Moonandra tries to kill him later on; I’m going to guess that Cass’s feelings weren’t actually altered. If anything their relationship might actually be worse now, cause Cassandra keeps acting like she’s never had friends and Eugene has taken up Rapunzel’s blind devotion. 

All that development in season one is just, poof, gone. Also it’s quite possible that the first movie as well has now it has been erased from existence as Eugene got his needed character development eight years too early. How the hell that’s suppose to work, I don’t know. 

Outside of the that we get no confirmation how anybody else was effected, even though a more brainwashed Eugene running around would undoubtedly have caused a butterfly effect. Don’t expect that to be explored anytime soon. 

Though, it would explain why he’s suddenly such a doormat in season three, if this was the second episode as theorized. 

No! This is the Wrong Lesson!!!

Let me explain narrative promises. 

Everyone, on some basic fundamental level, understands how stories work. We hear them recounted to us over and over again from the day we're born to the day we die. It’s integral to how we communicate as human beings. Everyone knows innately how to tell a story even if that person couldn’t tell you how stories or structured or what certain literary terms mean, but they do it every day just through speaking. And while most audiences can’t always pin point what upsets them about a story they can for sure notice when things are off and not satisfying to experience. 

Now that doesn’t mean that everyone can write an awarding winning novel, that study of a craft isn’t important, nor that every amateurish critique thrown at any given media is valid. But it does mean that people have come to expect certain storytelling practices and can pick up on narrative cues. We’ve familiarized ourselves with the language of film, novels, comics, ect, into order to comprehend what’s going on. 

Rules of writing are just following that established language so that the audience can keep up. You can break these rules, sure, but unless you know what you’re doing and have a good narrative reason to do so, then you can easily lose you’re audience. And if you’re making money off said audience that’s something you want to avoid. 

A narrative promise is a cue; a set up that lets the audience know that ‘hey this is important, pay attention to this cause it’ll come back into play later’. Now that the audience has been alerted to the plot point they expect fulfillment of the promise. If you break that promise, either through poor set up, lack of follow through, or by breaking an established convention of writing for no other reason then because you just wanted to, your audience is going to walk away unsatisfied. 

The argument at the beginning of the episode was a narrative promise. It was a cue that set up the interpersonal conflict of the main character. For add context, I know that this is a coming of age story. Convention would dictate that the protagonist would resolve this conflict by learning they were wrong. 

That’s not what happened here. 

Convention was subverted. It wasn’t the protagonist who grew and change, it was the person they were in conflict with who did. And it wasn’t subverted because of any greater narrative reason, or future pay off, or even as effort to be shallowly ‘clever’; it was subverted because the author just didn’t want to hold the main character accountable for anything. Because said character has now become his avatar for his wish fulfillment fantasy and having the main character admit fault would be to admit fault in ones own self. Rapunzel doesn’t feel like Rapunzel this season because she’s just Chris in a wig. 

The episode broke a narrative promise to the audience; both within the episode and in the greater premise of the story, because of ego. 

I don’t claim this episode is bad just because of personal taste nor because I find it morally repulsive (even though both those things are true), I call it bad because it exhibits bad writing. Plain and simple. 

Way To Undermine The Entire Point of the Original Movie, Show

Speaking of breaking narrative promises.... 

TTS is suppose to be a squeal to the original movie. It’s even in the title of the show; both of them. In one fell swoop, the series has managed to sabotage it’s very reason for existing, as it erases Eugene’s motivation and the inciting incident that kick started the film. 

 Way to fucking go. 

To further twist the knife, it diminishes the duel protagonist of said film in order to prop up a series original character, who isn't even present in the episode itself. 

I don’t mind Cassandra’s existence. I don’t even mind her being the new deuteragonist and one of the main villains; even though she wouldn’t have been my first pick to fulfill those roles given her lack of set up. But I do fucking mind it if she upstages other characters and/or derails their character arcs in the process. 

This is the Death of New Dream 

I was still in denial when this episode first aired. I honestly believed that this and The Return of the King was build up to a third “betrayal” where Eugene finally became fed up with Rapunzel’s bullshit and joined forces with Zhan Tiri. I thought the end of the series would have Rapunzel apologize to everyone she did wrong, Varian, Cass, and Eugene, in order to break ZT’s hold on them, and that true love’s kiss would reunite the sundrop and the moonstone and that would just tie everything together into a neat little bow and give us a truly daring character study of a Disney hero. 

Oh dear merciful heavens, was I ever wrong.  

How did we go from season one’s challenging and mature storyline, complete with Disney’s first real anti-villian, to this?! 

What the hell happened!? 

Rapunzel not only disrespects Eugene’s opinions, violates his privacy and trust as she manipulates him as a teen, and then brainwashes him to think like her (even if accidentally), but doesn’t even have good grace to tell him. She instead has the audacity to look all happy and self congratulatory because she got want she wanted. She, and the show at large, doesn’t care what evil thing she does to get the desired outcome Rapunzel wants. 

Rapunzel in this show is a spoiled brat. And the image of her and her now lobotomized boyfriend staring dead eyed at a picture of the creator’s previous waifu OC with plastic smiles on their faces, sums up this series perfectly. 

Conclusion 

This isn’t even the worst episode of the series guys. I don’t know if it would even make it onto a bottom five list. That’s how much crap I have to wade through when it comes to this show. This is however the most damaging episode to the franchise as a whole. 

Not even the most hardcore of New Dream fans want to acknowledge the existence of that final scene, and Rapunzel stans won’t defend her beyond, ’well she didn’t mean too, it’s the writing that’s bad.’ Yeah, the writing is bad, that’s why the character can’t and shouldn’t be defended, not here and not in other badly written episodes where she also does bad things and never makes up for it. 

Anyways I’m finally caught up to where I left off, before the move, though sadly I don't think I’ll get this series done by the end of the month like I had originally hoped. But if you would like to help out I have a ko-fi you can drop a tip into if ya want. 

https://ko-fi.com/rachelbethhines

[popculturebuffet]

Goof Week: Sports Goofy in SoccerMania: GoofTales Woo-oo! (Paid For for WeirdKev27)

Gorsh all you happy people and welcome back to Goof Week, my Weeklong Celebration of everyone’s favorite goofus. 

And today we have a special treat, something nice and obscure but something that still has a vital place in Disney History. Welcome folks to Sports Goof in Soccermania!  

So yesterday in my Goof Troop review I wished there had been another DuckTales episode with Goofy, you know maybe find out what happened to Peg, see Max and Roxanne again that sort of thing.  Whelp SOMEONE must’ve hid a Monkey’s Paw around here somewhere because I got this special instead on comision. This is a VERY intresting little artifact as it came out only 4 months before DuckTales, was produced around the same time, and was written by Tad Stones, who would both go on to work on DuckTales and even more importantly create Darkwing Duck. 

Not only that but it has some odd things attached to it: it’s the first major production starting Scrooge, as he had an educational short about him, the first animated appearance of the Beagle Boys and most important the FIRST time Russi Taylor would voice Huey, Dewey and Louie, something she’d do till her passing a few years ago. At the time of this article she has not been recast, though I personally vote for Cristina Valenzuela, who took over the role of Young Donald and frankly does such a good job with that voice I didn’t know if Russi had already recorded lines for Season 3 before her passing. 

So what IS Sports Goofy in Soccermania you ask? It was a TV Special from 1987, again four months before DuckTales, that was later sold on VHS. My guess is Disney intended for this to become a regular thing like the Charlie Brown or Garfield specials, but my honest guess is with DuckTales MASSIVE success they wanted to put all the TV Animation resources into making more shows to go with it. The fact the special is essentailly a Scrooge story with Goofy in it and Scrooge and the Boys were now tied up in DuckTales probably helped the decision. So we only got one of these and i’m proud to share it for Goof Week. So join me under the cut to see what a Sports Goof is, what Scrooge sounds like without Alan Young or David Tennant andto see me refrence the film UHF because I likes it. 

 So we open with the titles which are neat and then open at the Money bin, we even get a great sign gag that looks like something Carl Barks would write.

So Scrooge greets his nephews the way he greets everybody.. with a canon to the face... though he backs of firing once he realizes it’s them. The boys ALL wear red this special so .. I guess Huey won and now rules all three bodies with an iron fist? So the Huey Hive Mind asks Scrooge for a donation, a standard Scrooge setup, ask the rich asshole for money, as their trying to help the local soccer program and they need a buck fiddy for a trophy. 

Scrooge’s voice here.. is terrible. I do not like to bash voice actors, they are hard working talented people who do a lot of great stuff, often for less pay than they deserve, and this blog ALWAYS makes that painfully clear. And Will Ryan is not without talent: While he hasn’t done much i’m familiar with he did play Petrie in Land Before Time and was great in it. So while I don’t dislike him as a person.. he did an utterly DREADFUL Scrooge. He dosen’t really attempt to do a scottish accent despite the character still saying cannae at one point, and as for what accent he is going for...

His Scrooge just sounds like someone trying to do a “foreign” accent and failing. It just sounds weird and makes every bit of his dialouge aside from one a chore to sit through. And the dialouge isn’t bad dialouge, it’s a well written and animated Scrooge even with the lower budget than Ducktales, but the voice just ruins it for me. Even without Young and Tennant to compare it to this just blows and the fact it’s paired up with the iconic Russi Taylor voice for the triplets.

This being Scrooge he instead fishes a Trophy out of the bin that’s all banged up and dinky and shoos them out. So in natural Barksian fashion the trophy turns out to be worth a million dollars. So we get some reaction shots.. INCLUDING GRANDMA DUCK!

For DuckTales fans joining us who have ZERO idea who that is, since she sadly did not make it into the reboot and Frank did have ideas, Grandma Duck is Donald, Della and Gladstone’s grandma. She’s a sweet old country woman who lives on a farm and is in fact the one who sold him Kilmotor HIll, with her husband renaming it from Killmule hill. I like her a lot since she reminds me of my own grandma and like her she still works when she can. Donald’s cousin Gus loafs around and eats as her farmhand. As you can tell I like her a lot, agani because she reminds me of one of my grandmas so this was nice even if she was only around for 20 seconds of screentime. 

This ends up in the paper and sends Scrooge through the roof, literally when he finds out. 

Two notes  before we move on: The bin has a unique really cool design , though I get why other productions haven’t used it: besides this one’s obscurity while cool it just looks a bit TOO nice for Scrooge. Even in 2017 while still damn cool looking it still looks practicle. This .. is not that.

This looks like MC Hammer built this. It still looks awesome bu tit’s just not Scrooge sadly. 

The other is that his Butler is named Jeeves here, but looks almost exactly like Duckworth. Just feels weird is all. 

Naturally the Beagle Boys happen upon the paper too and their leader, no name given has a plan: Enter legitmately and win the cup all legal like, which dosen’t sound like it lives up to the beagle code of no hones twork.... until he brings up theri going ot cheat their asses off. 

Meanwhile Scrooge tries bribing the boys with a giant trophy at their house... with Donald oddly absent despite Anselmo having taken over for Nash by this point. I know he was still a bit rough at the roll, but come on. It’s just.. weird especailly for reasons i’ll get into soon. 

So Scrooge agrees to sponsor the boys teams so he can get the trophy back square, and is forced to buy a knew ball and here we FINALLY get Goofy. I say finally because this special is 20 mintues long and it takes almost a fourth of it for him to arrive. It’s just weird for him to not be in it for so long. I mean I don’t want THIS

Flashbeagle didn’t take a fourth of the special to get to Flashbeagle. It did take longer than that to get to the title track but when your sitting on THIS

You gotta use it JUST right. Goofy here is not played by Bill Farmer, which IS odd as he did start playing him that year, but my guess is they weren’t sure if they were going with Farmer or the actor who played him in this special, Tony Pope, so they were trying out both as whoever DID get the role would have it for life. Disney takes the casting of the sensational 7 VERY seriously, as evidenced by the fact most cast changes are caused by death and unlike with Tony and Donald it’s clear Colvig hadn’t picked a succesor. I can also see why it’s a hard choice: while farmer IS excellent and was the right man for the job, Pope is still excellent in the role, bringing the warmth and energy you’d expect from Goofy and having excellent comedic timing that’s vital to getting the dog man right. I can see why this was such a hard choice, even if I also see they went with Farmer: Farmer just has slightly more energy to the roll. It’s a small diffrence and something that dosen’t effect the special, but it is a KEY diffrence and the reason Bill’s THE goofy to me even over his original voice actor Pinto Colvig. 

Also I may of mispoke there... see it’s not Goofy in this special it’s SPORTS Goofy. No really every bit of dialogue refers to him as Sports Goofy. It’d be like if they refered to then CEO Micheal Eisner as Won’t Think Through Eurodisneyland Micheal Eisner. 

So Sports Goofy helps them get a ball in an honestly awesome way and shows despite his clumsy manner, he’s damn cordinated, easily putting everything up and showing some real skill with the ball. So Moneygrubbing Scrooge decides Sports Goofy is his ticket to get the trophy back and recuits goofy as coach and star player for the boys team. 

So Asshole Scrooge meets his team the Greenbacks.. which are a bunch of random animal characters with no real personality. They are a hippo, a goat, expresso the ostrich, a navy (blue) seal,  an elephant in a beanie, a killaroo and a cheetah or leopard. But I have one question, really simple really easy one...

You need 11 players for a soccer team, thank you google. So they DID get that accurate. With Goofy and the Triplets you only need 7 more. THIS is why Donald’s absence is glaring: he’s just oddly not there when they needed 7 other characters but Elephant in a Beanie gets in there. And it’s not hard ot fill either: Donald , Daisy (Because duh), Gyro and Grandma Duck (Because both cameoed but I only mentioned Grandma Duck, though this is ALSO Gyro’s first apperance), Gladstone (who as it turns out had a cameo storyboarded that didn’t make it into the final product), Gus (Since grandma duck) and Scrooge’s butler since he was in an earlier scene anyway so why waste the character model. They could still play the same roll as easily steamrolled underdogs and it’d make more sense.  It just baffles me that with such a deep bench to play from, they don’t use ANY OF IT in favor of the cast of Animal Soccer World.

The Greenbacks can’t play for greenjack, which worries Scrooge.. but Goofy is able to carry them to the finals, while the Beagle Boys make their way there too. We find this out.. via newspaper transition. We get a bunch of headlines telling us what happened instead of you know a montage because that costs money and they already spent 1.50 making this special.. they only have 50 cents left. 

So the Beagles recognizing Sport Goofy is the only thing in their way plots a kidnappin. We get a gut busting scene of the beagles all hiding in Sports Goofy’s house with him being oblvious only to spring on him. 

The next day with Sports Goofy a no show the team is bummed, even mor ewhen they find a kidnapping note from Don’tGetNotToLeaveEvidence Beagle Boys. Seriously give that to the officals. 

So Asshole Scrooge tries to give a rousing speech... and it is a sight to behold and the one highlight of pope as scrooge... it’s why I picked it as the article image. That glitching isn’t me by the way: it REALLY does that. Coupled with the yellow eyes i’ts just fantastic. So the team decides to morosely play the game and Hivemind Huey boos scrooge for not having faith in him. Instead of again you know telling the officials. Maybe assimilating the other made Huey dumber. I

So the game begins and the Cheating Beagles cream the Give Up To Easily Green Backs, while Sports Goofy watches from the other Crime Beagles hideout. It honestly reminds me of UHF: a dumb well meaning guy whose vital to something succeding is kidnapped.. it dosen’t involve Weird Al dressing up as rambo but still. It also makes me want UHF but with the disney cast. Fethry as weird al, Donald as his best friend, Fethry’s girlfriend for the comcis as weird al’s girlfriend, Gyro as philo, Goofy as Stanley, and Pete of course is Stacey Keach. I could go on but you get the point. Someone draw this.  Sport Goofy is a clever bastard and escapes by working one of his shoes off, taking a nearbye knife and cutting himself free.. and almost stabbing a beagle boy in the face but that would just make two. Sport Goofy escapes and the lunkheaded beagle boys chase after him IN THEIR CAR WHILE GOOFY RUNS AHEAD OF IT.  Goofy, he can really move! Goofy, he’s got attitude! Goofy HE’S THE FASTEST THING ALLIIIIVEEEEEE. Sport Goofy makes it in time fo rhalf time, rallies the troops and it goes how you’d expect: They overcome the beagles blatant cheating, win the cup, the beagles attempt to cheat with a rigged ball backfires and they all get arrested. It’s by the numbers stuff. We end with Scrooge deciding to dontate the trophy instead (though in a great bit asking if it was tax deductible), and posing for a team shot> We get some awesome credits music and we’re out

Final Thoughts:

This special is mediocre: There are only a handful of great jokes, it’s your standard “teamwork makes the dreamwork plot” that dosen’t work because our underdogs really CAN’T play without their star, and Scrooge’s voice hurts to listen to. Pope and Taylor are great and while Will Ryan is an awful Scrooge, he is a good Beagle Boy or five. 

It IS worth a watch though. It’s riffable enough with the sometimes sloppy unfinished animatoin in the last part and Scrooge’s terrible voice, and it is still is a neat oddity for 90′s kids like myself to not only see Russi’s first thing as Huey Dewey and Louie, but to also see Scrooge and Goofy with vastly diffrent voice actors, as well as Gyro and the Beagle Boys first animated apperances. The fact this came just months before Ducktales makes it all the more intresting. So if your looking for a legit good Disney product.. this is shoddy at best if well meaning. But as a bit of disney history, especially only clocking in at 20 minutes so it’ sa brisk watch, it’s worth a look if your into that. 

Next On Goof Week: We come on in To The House of Mouse where goofy becomes faster than a speeding punchline,  more powerful than pete when his family has to wrestle him to the ground to take him to the doctor and able to make tall leaps of logic in a single bound. it’s SUPER GOOF!

So thank you for reading and if you liked this review give it a like and consider joining my patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet. As a patron you’d get access to exclusive reviews, the patreon’s discord and to pick a short each time I do one of these shortstaculars. Donald’s comnig next month and the deadline is in only a few days to join up for said month so the clock is ticking. Even a dollar a month helps me reach my stretch goals so please i fyou can sign up today and if not, I understand and i’ll see you at the next rainbow

[wastingoxygensince1983]

Alriiiight i finished season 1 of sense8! You're were right it's really good. The show has excellent representation, not only about different sexualities, but also about different cultures and various issues and honestly, very few shows would dare to include all these themes together in a show.

The cast is diverse and very talented and it is quite a feat to find eight different people to cast as leads that all have great chemistry with each other. But they did, and they managed to develop and explore everyone equally.

That's the thing i really liked about this show, they really took their time to introduce the characters and explore them. And they used the concept of the sensates to do exactly that. If this was, let's say, the cw, they would have used the characters as plot devices to move the plot along. But that didn't happen, despite the fact that the whole concept of the sensates and the whispers is fascinating and original so many writers would have rushed to move the plot forward. They used it to tell the characters' stories and establish the relationships between them. I mean I'm sure fans could have claimed that in many occasions, the show was "too slow" because there were episodes where people literally just stood around talking. But i really liked it. It was very refreshing, especially after watching supergirl.

I love all the members of the cluster equally, i think i have a soft spot for Sun, Riley and Capheus though. Capheus' scenes with both of them were amazing.

Also Lito, boy I love him. Tried to fight joaquin with two flower pots. He's so precious. And his relationship with hernando is just the best.

And that finale, man, it was soooo great!! The stakes where so high and the way they all connected....whoa. Nomi, wow is there anything she can't hack? Amazing. Everything was going great and then damn! Will looked Whispers in the eyes. (that's really creepy btw, reminds me of the wiping angels at doctor who). Don't know how they are gonna fix that, they can't keep him sedated forever.

So far only will and riley have met in person. I hope they all gather together at some point.

The dynamic of the cluster is what makes the show so special.

I’m really glad you enjoyed. Sometimes I feel bad to recommend shows because I’m not sure if the person is gonna like it or not; but sense8 is the only show I have recommend that everyone ends liking.

Everything you said is true. The chemistry, the characters treatment, the finale.

Season 1 was a perfect way to set the characters backstory giving each one of them enough plot to make us love equally, and even if we have favorites we can’t say we don’t like one of them.

I love the finale because it shows how each one of them can add something to the cluster, and how each one of them is important to the cluster.

Now season 2 is bigger and the plot is more global than in season 1.

Also, the actor that played Capheus resign between seasons, and they recast him with another for the start of season 2. I’m not sure why he resign; apparently he didn’t like to do the orgy scenes and that’s something important to express in the show; the fact that each one of them feels everything at the same time.

Even me as ace felt ok with those moments.

I recommend you to watch the Christmas special that is the first episode of season 2. It gives you an idea of how is gonna be the season, but also is a long episode(is basically a short movie).

Thank you for giving a try and I’m glad you like it.

That show deserves more recognition.

And like you said, I want people that watched supergirl to see how a show treat their characters with love and respect. Because is possible.

(I also sent you a question a few days ago, not sure if you received it, because tumblr is a mess sometimes)

[deejadabbles]

SPELLS OF DEFIANCE (ATEM X READER X YUGI) CHAPTER 8

EIGHT: BLOOD

One //// Two //// Three //// Four //// Five //// Six //// Seven //// Eight //// [Nine coming soon]

Summary: The Circle of Magicians protects the world from rogue, murderous fey. The police who keep bloodsuckers and flesh-eaters in check. You’ve hunted vampires for years, earning a reputation as one of the best magicians in that field; but what happens when an encounter with a particular vampire makes your already fragile loyalties split? Supernatural/Demon Hunter AU. Vampire!Atem x Reader x Incubus!Yugi (yes, a polyamorous relationship). Warnings for cursing, vulgar language, violence, and some sexual themes.

A.N: Sorry this took so long to get out, personal upheavals and writer's block has been kicking my butt lately. Anywho, I hope you guys like this update, but I do want to warn all of you that there are depictions of violence and an incident involving self-harm in this chapter. Please be cautious of reading this chapter if those are themes you're sensitive to. As always comments are greatly appreciated and help keep me motivated to continue writing, thank you for reading.  Oh, also, I made mood boards/edits for this series, in case any of your are interested in that <3

A crack so thunderous that it shook the walls around you sounded. Ears rang, blood spilled, and someone laughed. A sound cold and cruel bellowed as you were thrown back, senses reeling and vision blackening as skin made painful contact with the cement floor.

“Keith!” Duke’s eyes were wide as he watched you fly back, his own ears stinging even when he looked back to his fellow magician with a glare. “They said to take her alive, you idiot!” His fists clenched, eyes darting to the man’s arm. It still surged and flashed with lightning, flickers of electricity darting across his skin from his overpowered spell. His palm remained trained on you, and the seal on his palm still glowed from the magic.

Keith had the gall to chuckle again, “Relax, pretty boy. Even I know that wouldn’t kill her.”

Duke’s eyes widened again, and he looked back in your direction, finding you had managed to land on your knees, head bowed and arm holding you up as your shoulders shook with every labored breath.

“At least the attack broke down her defenses. Bitch always was good at keeping her armor up,” Keith added, sick grin glowering down at you.

You raised your head, vision finally coming back into focus after the attack. Your nose had broken from the impact, trailing red down your mouth and chin. However, to Keith’s obvious annoyance, the only other sign of harm were the glass-like cracks coating your face, your personal shield deteriorating under the force of his spell. He was right, you had always had a talent in armor spells, casting a constant barrier around your body, coating you in protection like a second skin. Your ability to redirect that shield to take the brunt of his attack was the only reason you weren’t a gory mess on the floor. It came at a cost though, and Keith knew it, you wouldn’t have the power to recast your armor spell for awhile.

You were vulnerable.

“Should have known they’d send their favorite dog after me,” you said, trying to make your form as steady as possible when you rose to your feet. Your jeans were rent, knees bloody and torn from the concrete.

Still, you stood tall.

Keith laughed again, “Well, not like they were gonna send pretty boy after you alone.” He shifted then, body moving into a combative pose, ready to fight. “Damn, I’m going to enjoy this.”

You actually smirked back at him, adrenaline kinking up your energy. Your eyes wandered past Keith’s shoulder, noting the wide cracks and barely stable wall just behind him.

Yes, that would do nicely.

A quick fluid motion and you reached out with your magic, grabbing hold of the crumbling stone, and pulled. The concrete followed in a thunderous cloud, and Keith barely had time to turn before the debris crashed down on him with a shout.

It wouldn’t be enough, you knew, but it bought time. You turned to Duke, grabbing a particularly large piece of rubble with your magic, just as your old friend’s face fell.

“Ah shit,” Duke muttered, then flung himself out of the way as you threw the debris.

Dust and curses were flung into the air, giving you the perfect cover as you jumped through a broken window of the nearest building, taking refuge behind the rotting walls. Let them chase you, they wouldn’t even realize the roles of hunter and prey were switched before it was too late.

You began your ascent to the top of the five-story building, climbing through holes in the floorboards and pouncing off rickety steps. Just as you cleared the third floor you heard a rumble and knew that Keith must have blasted his way out of the rubble. That was confirmed a moment later when you heard him scream at Duke, demanding to know where you went. Another yell at Duke’s answer, then Keith’s angry voice was ordering them to slip up, him taking one building, and Duke the other.

You grinned to yourself at the foolhardy decision- though you instantly regretted it when blood seeped past your lips at the act. You were definitely in for a lot of pain when this was over.

You were on the top floor now and heard the sounds of someone moving about below. He must have assumed you would go for higher ground, because the movements got closer a split second later; a teleportation spell. You looked up, finding the gutted state of this floor to your advantage despite the wide-open space. The ceilings were high, and the half-exposed rafters in those ceilings were dark, a perfect perch.

The footsteps grew closer as you jumped, climbing into the rafters with almost cat-like grace, and waited for whichever man had chosen this building. Unfortunately, you almost gave sigh when a whisper of a voice called out your name. Of course it had to be Duke.

He was within sight now, rising from the less than stable staircase on the other side of the room. His approach was cautious, eyes scanning the area with care as he called out to you again.

“I know you’re up here, so I’m going to ask you this now, come out and neither of us has to get hurt. I...I know this looks bad, but- damn it, you know I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to hunt you like- like some fey monster. Just come back with me, come back home and I promise I’ll help you convince the Council it was a big, messy mistake. I’m not the only one on your side, either. Mahad, Mana, Ryou- we’re all worried about you.”

Despite your taut state, his words actually did send something sharp through your chest. Memories of a younger Duke winking and flipping his hair at you played in your head, alongside other memories of him curled up beside your hospital bed and his hand gripped in yours as you pulled each other to safety. Friends weren’t actually touted as something valuable in the Circle, but Duke was one of the few you considered to be exactly that.

He cursed, then said your name a third time, sounding particularly desperate now, “I don’t want Keith to find you first,” he said to the room, his eyes continuing to scan the area. “You know what he’s like, and I think...I think his plan is to kill you, and tell the Council he had no other choice. I don’t want that to happen...”

Your hands gripped the wood of the rafters as Duke walked right below your hiding spot. Then, with an exhale of breath, you jumped down. Before he even had time to turn you cast your quick spell and pushed. It was barely enough force to make him tumble, but it put enough distance between you two as he swung around and narrowed his eyes.

“I’m sorry Duke,” you said, and took your battle stance, “but I can’t go back. I won’t.”

Something genuine filled his eyes, something hurt or desperate, but his expression was steel as he said, “Alright.”

Then his hands were moving, tracing a symbol in the air and it glowed with his magic. There was no use trying to dodge it, when his casting was finished an invisible force like a black hole began pulling you in, sucking in every loose object in the room. Your feet left the ground and you were practically flying towards the void his magic created- but you were ready.

Just as you were within range you flung an arch of fire, one that passed his black hole and slashed across his chest. With his concentration broken, the spell faltered, glowing sigil fading like a burnt bulb- though the power of its pull still sent you flying into the wall. Your bones ached in protest as you fell to the ground, but you didn’t- couldn’t miss a beat before springing back to your feet. Just in time too, because Duke was already on you. Your arms blocked his kick, before answering with an uppercut, and the moment he stumbled you shot another burst of fire that sent him falling.

Duke was an agile thing, though, and recovered before you could even fire another shot. A dance began, bursts of your flames soaring through the air one after another after another, and Duke using his own magic to cast them aside with graceful hands.

A full-on fire wasn’t what you were aiming for though, and you saw the pain twinge across his face when your strikes grazed his jacket. And finally, it was enough. Duke shouted in pain as the flames caught and spread across his coat. Much like you and Keith, magicians like Duke had their own armor, he just imbued the magic in a literal coat. Now, as Duke scrambled to pull the flaming garment off, his defenses were down, just like yours.

You didn’t let up, as much as you wanted to, and closed in on Duke as he threw his leather armor aside. A hard kick and he was sent to the ground, but his boot made painful contact with your sternum, shoving you away as he sprang back to his feet. Another flame, another shout of pain and you moved in for the proverbial kill.

He was fast, and threw his hand up, summoning a portal a mere step in front of you. You couldn’t stop your advance and fell through the portal with a shout. Suddenly falling through open air, you barely had time to register a pile of sharp somethings just below you, and cast flames to turn it to ash a moment before crashing into it.

Your senses reeled, coughing as ash flew down your throat and plumed about you, your body screaming in protest. You shook your head, opening your eyes to see that he had teleported you to the floor below. You had landed on a busted table or some other furniture that the old studio apartment was full of.

Just as you were standing up you heard a familiar sound, another portal- but a blow struck your ribs before you could react. You stumbled, knocking into another table as Duke closed in and tried for a second, but you jumped, landing on top of the table which his fist struck instead. You spun, landing the heel of your foot across his face with a resounding crack . The force was enough to slam him down hard on the table and later you would wince at the crimson that spat across the surface. Still he recovered, enough to knock into your knee and make it buckle, but it was a desperate move; one that allowed you to grab a fist full of his hair and slam him back into the table with even more force.

He went slack in an instant, sliding to the ground like a rag doll as you stepped back. A groan, and then stillness. You watched for a moment until you confirmed the steady rise and fall of his breathing.

“I’m- sorry, Duke,” you panted. He would hurt when he woke, and hot guilt prickled across your skin, especially at the sigh of his bloodied mouth. Still, you had to remind yourself that all in all, he would be fine, especially after the Sanctuary's healers saw to him. Besides, no matter how brutal the attacks seemed, it was far from the worst you’d dealt in a battle. And you did take a second to appreciate how much Duke’s combat skills had improved, he had grown a lot from the boy you used to sweep-kick into submission every time you two sparred.

You hopped off the table and knelt by his unconscious form, tugging at his belt until the spellbook that hung from it was pulled out from underneath him. You unlatched it and flipped through the pages until you found the right one. If you wanted to get past that barrier, you have to break the seal Duke used to cast it. You thought you had found the right one when you turned to the first glowing page, but to your surprise, that sigil was not for a barrier, but for a mute spell, used when you wanted no one outside a certain area to hear you. Well, you wondered why your fight hadn’t drawn Keith’s attention, apparently Duke had wanted privacy when trying to persuade you to surrender yourself.

You moved past the thought, not having time to dwell, and continued to turn pages until you found yet another glowing source. This time it was the right spell, and you hastily tore the page from the book, disrupting the magic that caged you here. You glanced out the nearest window-

But nothing happened. The glowing barrier didn’t budge.

A curse that was practically a scream ripped through your throat. Duke was smart, he must have made two parts, two seals, to his barrier. You had to destroy the other seal before you could escape.

And who else would have that second seal besides-

“Quit hiding, you bitch!”

You sighed as Keith’s taunt echoed, a quick peer over a window sill confirming that he was storming out of the other building and marching straight towards yours. You wouldn’t be able to escape without facing him. Time to take out the trash, as they say.

Only when you started rising to your feet did you finally take more notice of your injuries and you had to steady your breathing to calm the surges of pain. You suspected a fractured rib was dangerously close to becoming a broken one and the pain was sure to worsen by the minute. You had to end this quickly.

Before you moved to the other side of the room, you took a second to snatch something else off of Duke’s belt and tuck it in your own pocket. Keith was quickly bounding up the floors below you now. With a sudden plan blinking into your head, you slipped your jacket from your shoulders and using a chair for height, propped it up on a collection of loose ceiling beams. Judging by the way he was charging up the rotting staircase, it would be the first thing he would see when he got here, and you quickly slipped to the other end of the room.

Not a minute later that thundering crack sounded, an arc of lightning cutting through the air and striking the coat tucked between the rafters. And just as Keith stepped up from the stairwell a second later, you charged.

He hadn’t even managed to turn enough to cover his flank as your foot made contact with his knee- but it was like hitting steel, his barrier still protecting him even as he stumbled. With a spin your leg came up, knocking him hard in the chest and he let out a shout as he went tumbling back down the stairs. You couldn’t press the advantage though, he let off another shot of lightning, making you duck away from the stairwell in retreat.

How a lumbering muscle like him moved so fast was beyond you, but you didn’t get time to gain much distance before he was back up the steps and you were scrambling to avoid another cracking bolt- heat grazing past you even as you did. You crashed to the ground in the messy dodge, and had to roll to avoid his boot from coming down on your head as he closed in! You managed to spring back to your feet and even block one fist with your own- but his second made painful contact with your jaw.

He pressed his advantage, your ribs screaming as he wrapped his arms around your middle and threw you hard against the wall. Vision reeled as fingers gripped your hair, scalp burning as he pulled you back. Another painful wrack through your body as he slammed you again, back first, into the wall before clamping his hands around your throat.

The instinct to take in a gasp as he squeezed your windpipe was strong, but your eyes locked on his even as he chuckled.

“Told you I was going to enjoy this,” he hissed, his fingers tightening all the more.

You bared your teeth against his sick grin and focused, concentrating on channeling your magic to the palm that once bore your magician’s seal. It would take more effort than before, the magic that helped focus your attack gone, but your power was more than what the Circle had given you.

So wrapped up in his sadistic enjoyment, Keith didn’t notice your palm growing hotter- until you reached out and clamped your hand on his face. He screeched as the heat burned through the layers of his personal shield but even as his fingers recoiled to claw at your hand you held firm. A burst of glorious air filled your lungs, steeling your resolve as you rammed your knee into his groin. His knees buckled, only strengthening your advantage as your palm continued to burn against his face.

But before you could knock him further to the ground, Keith struck, a quick jab of his fist right to your injured ribs. Stars burst behind your eyes and you couldn’t keep your hold as he twisted your wrist back- though you did manage to catch his fist as he aimed to strike again. Fist and wrist caught in each other's hold, a moment-long stalemate ensued as you both struggled to get the upper hand on each other. His skin was an angry red as he growled at you, some fastly forming blisters making the faint imprint of your hand across his face.

The stalemate was broken when you slammed your forehead into his nose, something of his cracking even as your own broken bridge throbbed in pain at the motion. The moment he reared back you pushed out with your magic, the force sending him across the room. Much like you had with Duke, you kept pressing, flinging flames in a relentless onslaught that he had to dodge second by second.

He probably thought he was doing well, not a lick of flame doing more than grazing him, but then again, you weren’t trying to graze him. Each move to dodge brought him closer to your target and the moment he was lined up, you grabbed Duke's weapon from your belt. He must have expected more fire because he didn’t have time to change tactics as the end of a rope dart soared towards him instead of flames. The blade swung, wrapping the rope around Keith’s throat as his eyes widened but even as he made to tug at it, you were faster. WIth all the force you could conjure, you aimed your spell at him, sending him stumbling even further back. He didn’t stand a chance as you closed the distance at a run- and slammed your foot into his chest.

All that power sent him sailing through the window behind him with a shattering crash!

You had just enough time to hold your end of the rope firm before it was pulled taught by Keith’s falling body. You did stumble from the force of his stop, but you held tight and quickly managed to anchor the rope. Not a second later were you hopping through the window yourself and landing, with some effort, to the concrete ground below.

After getting your bearings, you stood tall and looked up, eyes landing on a struggling Keith as he squirmed against the rope wrapped around his neck. He was a good three feet off the ground, and you had to admit, you did take a bit of satisfaction watching him struggle. But, what now? Keith was as bad as they came when dealing with violent and untrustworthy magicians. But did you really intend to let the rope hang him?

Just as you stepped forward, Keith took the decision out of your hands, reaching to the back of his belt even as his veins started to pop across his neck and face. He produced a knife, and you couldn’t help but sighed as he reached up to saw at the rope.

It was quick work, and you once again readied yourself as he fell to the ground, coughing. This was, admittedly, bad, you could feel your stores of magic depealting, and the pain of your injuries was getting harder to ignore.

He recovered quickly enough to snap his head up and glare at you quite vehemently, “Bitch!”

“You really need to think of a better insult,” you sighed as he scrambled to charge at you.

You lunged to the side when he made to grab you around the middle again, but he was quick on the turn and something flashed in the sunlight as your hand came up to block him. He dropped the blade into his free hand and made to stab again- only to be thrown over your shoulder as you turned into his grip. Though he hit the ground hard, sprawling out with a grunt, he was quick with a kick and landed a hard blow on your shoulder. He took your grip on his hand to his advantage too, and hoisted himself back up while throwing you off balance.

Then a scream ripped through your throat! Hot pain sliced across your stomach, and you barely stepped back in time to avoid another slash of his knife.

You clambered further from him, hand reflexively covering your belly and assessing the damage. The cut was shallow, even as it burned and bled crimson, but it was a large gash. This had to end, now!

Red-faced, boil-covered, and blood-stained, Keith still managed to grin at you as he brandished his blade in a taunting threat. You were vaguely aware of more red wetting your shirt, but you had to push it to the back of your thoughts as Keith made to strike again.

A block, a lunge back, a jab in retaliation, but he didn’t let up on his attacks. You found that you were being corralled closer to the building, not good. A duck as he swung his blade and you managed to swing behind him. Still crouched, you landed another hit on his knee and it was enough to make him buckle. You sprang up to land another blow but he was quicker. Another scream as his fist made contact with your ribs and you were sent tumbling back.

You crashed to the ground as the world spun, waves of pain washing through you. Yup, definitely a broken rib.

Another sick chuckle had your vision clearing enough to see Keith stalking towards you, smile widening as he tossed his blade aside. “I’ll just tell the Council I had to fry you, not like they’ll care anyway,” he held his fist up at the claim, “A close quarter impact, yeah, they’ll buy my story if they think I acted on instinct.” A second later electricity was sparking around his knuckles. “And I’ll make sure to hunt down your boyfriends too,” he continued in a hiss, and the arcs started to spread, coiling down his arm as he charged his attack, “I figure I can make them suffer a lot more than you. Yeah, I’ll enjoy that too.”

Your teeth were bared again, and a growl rumbled in your chest even as you silently prepared your own counter. Keith was always his sloppiest when he thought he had the upper hand.

A threat about staying away from Yugi and Atem was hot on your tongue, but before you could spit it out Keith was lunging, ready for the kill! Your hand shot up, catching his fist in mid-strike that might have broken your arm if not for the magic coursing through you. His lightning arched and flashed- flickering as its tendrils slowly crept down your own arm.

He had meant to send the electricity through you like an overpowered thunderbolt, but your own spell was absorbing it! You growled as the effort to redirect the energy back at him took its toll through your already battered body. He was fighting you, cursing you as he tried to tear past your magic and finish his killing blow.

A fierce cry rattled your throat as you pushed on with all your might-

Thunder so loud it might have cracked the very sky sounded. Something tore- something broke between the flesh and blood of your arm as the power between you two reached its peak! Through the bright flash, you thought you saw Keith being thrown back, but the force pushing you into the hard concrete wracked your senses, almost as much as the searing pain pulsating in your arm!

Your ears were ringing, the world had lost any real sense of balance as the sky above reeled and rolled. You were vaguely aware of clutching your arm to your chest as you bit down on your tongue, trying and failing to stop the cry of agony from leaving your throat.

A few shuttering intakes of breath and the world slowly started to right itself. Your ears were still ringing, but you managed to roll to your side (the side not screaming in pain) and find Keith, slumped motionless against the cracked building. You almost chuckled in relief. You were battered, a little bloody, and much worse for wear, but you were still standing- so to speak.

After another moment of gathering your wits, you clambered to your knees and started to rise, only then taking stock of your arm. It wasn’t as bad as if felt, though some nasty purple was already forming under the skin. The sheer amount of power between you two had been too much, and the recoil of it releasing had probably fractured a bone or two in your arm. Still, you were the one who remained conscious. You would take a bit more gratification in that once your body felt a little less like a crash-test dummy.

You made your way over to Keith’s body, taking note that he was still breathing despite looking like death warmed over. After fishing around in his jacket pocket, you found the spell paper that had the other half of the barrier seal scribbled on it. With one arm basically useless, you had to grip the corner of the paper between your teeth, and a sigh that hurt a little too much left your chest as the shimmering dome around you started to dissolve the moment you tore the parchment.

You had just enough energy left to teleport back home, and the thought of Yugi and Atem’s reactions to your state was already playing in your head as you took another step-

And fell to the ground.

A hiss of pain as you hit the concrete, and it was only then that you finally noticed the cold, seeping, numbness.

Your mind raced, but you tried to keep your breathing steady as you rolled onto your back and pulled your shirt up, realizing the lack of feeling was spreading from your stomach. Sprouting from the shallow but wide cut across your belly, there were nasty, vein-like lines crawling their way over your skin. Your eyes flashed to the dagger Keith had discarded as the answer dawned on you: poison.

You were already losing feeling in your legs, and your pitiful drops of remaining magic with it. Breaths were coming in ragged now as you tried to grip the last threads of your energy, even as you felt it slipping.

This…

This was not good.

***

“Aibou,” Atem’s tone was firm as he cut through his boyfriend’s rambling on the other end of the phone. It was only when Yugi froze in the middle of the phrase ‘what if she’s allergic-’ that Atem could finally get more than a word in. “I’m sure what you ordered is fine. We have plenty of options she can choose from, besides, if she doesn’t like what you order her, I know you’ll be willing to share your meal.”

He heard Yugi give a little sigh on the other end, “Yeah, I know, I just wish I had thought to wait until she got home before ordering.”

Atem found himself shaking his head despite the fact that Yugi couldn’t see him. Yugi was acting like he was a creature of impulse, and that ordering their takeout dinner before asking what you wanted was a recurring crime and not a simple misstep from a usually over-considerate man. “I’m sure she’ll love whatever you ordered for her, Aibou, you worry too much.”

“I know….” After the pouting pause, Atem heard a familiar bell tinkle on the other end of the line. “I have to go, be up in a bit.”

Atem said his quick “love you” before hanging up, again shaking his head at Yugi’s cute concern.

It was nearing the time for the shop to close, and Yugi had thought it a good idea to order-in dinner early, so you would have a fresh hot meal upon returning, and so the three of you would have plenty of time to follow up on any lead Bonz gave you after dinner. It was a good plan...until Yugi realized he still didn’t know all your food preferences until he was on the phone ordering said dinner.

“Too sweet sometimes,” Atem chuckled to himself, before setting the phone aside and returning to cleaning the dishes from his own mug-contained meal. Still, being reminded of the time, his mind once again traveled back to you. It was getting late. You had said it wouldn’t take long, but, exactly how long was that? He turned the knob to faucet off with a little too much force, something gory flashing in his mind as he watched the red remnants of his meal sliding down the sink into the drain.

He forced a sigh out through his nose and closed his eyes. It was hard not to worry, or, rather, to avoid that worry from stepping over the line into ‘overprotective’, as he was so known to do. Yes, it was late, but you likely had to walk, as you had mentioned you hated teleporting when it could be avoided. Maybe you had to make a stop on the way home, Yugi had mentioned some shops nearby where you could pick up essentials when needed, after all.

Atem scolded himself as he wandered out of the kitchen, unsure what to do with himself until you and Yugi came home. He had already spent a decent amount of time pulling out the video games he knew Yugi would want to show you, as well as ones he thought you might like, in the hopes that the three of you could have some bonding time later that night. Maybe he could-

Crash

In a glorious burst of glass and thick curtains splitting into ribbons, something sailed through the closed doors of the balcony. Atem’s hackles were up in an instant, even as he leapt back to avoid the sudden rays of setting sun pouring in through the remnants of the glass doors. The metallic and sweet smell of blood assaulted his senses, making his fangs elongate as he heard something heavy collide with the floor.

Then his blood turned to ice when he saw what was curled up in the wreckage. Your hand reached out feebly for just a moment before it fell, your body going still among the glass and splintered wood.

In an instant he was rushing towards you- only to hiss in pain and rear back as the sun blazed across his skin like hot talons. He felt his fangs cut into his lip as he swore loudly, you were laying right in the middle of the sunlight! He wheeled around the room, mind racing for a plan even as his mouth watered at the smell of blood permeating the air. By the gods, how badly were you hurt for the room to smell so intense in just a matter of seconds?!

Atem ran to the hallway closet, nearly tearing the door off the hinges as he threw it open. He grabbed a heavy blanket from the top shelf and started pulling it over his head and shoulders as he ran back to the living room. He barely took note of if his body was concealed in the blanket enough as he again ran to your side. Sharp shards split his skin as he tried to slide his hands under your form, and something was burning his legs as he worked. Finally though, he managed to get a hold of you good enough to pull you out of the sun and off of the debris. The moment he was out of the rays of fire, he wasted no time in gathering you in his arms and setting you on the couch as gently as he could, taking thankful note that your breathing was slow and shallow, but present.

A growl of anger and whine of concern caught in his throat when he saw the blood soaking your clothes. Colorful bruises were taking form across your skin and there were rips in your clothes sporting bloody abrasions. One was worse than the others though, and Atem found himself tearing the shirt in half so he could better see the cause of all the staining.

Another growl bubbled up as he saw the injury: a long cut right across your stomach. His hands were covering it in an instant, trying to stem the flow of red. The cut wasn’t deep and he might have wondered why there was so much blood if it wasn’t for the sickly markings crawling across your skin from the wound. What could cause this? Magic?

His mind raced for a course of action, even as it cursed his lack of knowledge in healing. What could he possibly do to counter whatever magic this-

The memory of purging the circle’s magic from your hand came flashing into his mind. You had said the curative coating his fangs must have some ability in negating magic. Could it possibly help here? He growled again as crimson continued to seep over the fingers clamped on your wound. Healing the magic or poison or whatever was afflicting you could wait, right now he just needed to make sure you didn’t bleed out!

Atem felt sick with the way his throat ached with need at the smell and sight of so much red. He knew the best way to seal the cut, but fear gave him pause. No matter how many centuries passed, no matter how long he honed his self-control, the memories of finding humans- innocent people, dead in his arms still haunted him.

Then his eyes darted up to your face. You were barely hanging on, breathing seeming to slow before his very eyes.

With all the self-control he could gather, he steeled himself against the thirst parching his throat, and pressed his mouth to the wound. He had but to graze his fangs across the torn skin so the curative on them took hold and started mending the flesh. He was painfully aware to be careful though, gentle as he moved his canines along the wound and not to worsen the cut.

As expected something like a shudder of relief (euphoria, even) shivered down his body as some of your blood seeped into his mouth. He ignored it, countered it with the self-loathing that writhed in his stomach, knowing that the thing he was could ever take any enjoyment in this.

His fingers gently followed his progress, making sure the skin was healing after the touch of his fangs. It was, and he nearly collapsed with relief when he pulled back and saw that only an angry-looking scar remained of the gash- well, of the gash itself, his brows furrowed when he saw that the vein-line markings around it were as sickly and deadly looking as before.

His mind was frantic again, searching for an answer before the sound of a door caused it to snap back to the world besides your injured form. His eyes darted up to land on Yugi, who had stepped inside only to have his smile vanish a moment later, his gaze landing on the living room.

“Help me!” Atem’s voice was raw in his throat and all but a yell, but Yugi snapped into action before he could blink.

The brown take-out bags in his hands spilled to the floor as Yugi ran to your side, “What happened!?”

“I don’t know, I think she barely managed to teleport home. I just sealed the cut that- that caused all this-” he waved his hands to indicate all the red- “but I think she’s been poisoned. Do you have anything in the shop that could heal her?”

Yugi didn’t answer, he was already fishing his phone out of his jean’s pocket as he looked over your form. One hand slid over the skin of your chest while the other frantically tapped at his phone screen, and it was only then that Atem realized the markings were still spreading.

“She’s burning up,” Yugi choked under his breath, even as the phone pressed to his ear started to ring. A moment later he was spewing a string of words into the receiver, “What could cause black marks under the skin? It might be magic, it might be poison, we don’t know which!”

After a stunned pause, Atem heard Anzu’s voice answer on the other end, hurriedly telling Yugi to send her a picture. Yugi did, snapping it as fast as he could and growling at his phone for taking too long to send it. Several long, agonizing moments ticked by as they waited for Anzu to answer, and when she did Yugi was scrambling to his feet and bolting back down the stairs to the shop. Atem almost ran after him, but the need to stay by your side anchored him, pulled him to stay right there. He looked back at you, chest clenching at the sight. Your skin was clammy, face taking on a bit of a hollow look as your chest barely lifted with each breath that had long pauses between them.

Atem found his hands reaching out to cup your face, the red staining them smearing across your cheeks as he tried to hold you. “Please- please just hold on,” he whispered.

A too-long moment later Yugi was bounding up the stairs and through the door again. Atem saw something flash in his hand as he fell to his knees beside the couch. A blade.

“You’re sure this will work?” Yugi panted as he tapped the speaker button on his phone and set it on the floor.

“It’s the best option you have,” Anzu’s voice snapped from the phone’s speaker, “but you have to put it on the same spot the poison entered.”

Though the remaining scar made that spot obvious, Atem pointed the wound out to Yugi, who looked pale as he hovered the dagger over your stomach.

“You’re going to need to hold her down,” came a shaky warning from the phone, just before Yugi pressed the flat of the blade to the scar.

An ear-splitting scream ripped through your throat and Atem flung himself to the other side of the couch, shaking hands gripping your shoulders as your body began to writhe. As gently as he could he pinned your shoulders to the couch, heart aching at the cries of pain spilling through your clenched teeth. Yugi, still holding the blade flat to your stomach, had to throw his body across your legs to keep them from thrashing and Atem thought he heard a distressed noise from the phone, but it was worth it as he saw the edges on the markings slowly begin to recede.

***

Yugi was fighting back tears. Now that the adrenaline was gone, stress and worry drug and tore at his senses, making it harder not to sob as he wiped the blood from your skin. The poison was purged from your body, thank god, but, if you had not already been passed out from the blood loss, the act of drawing the drug out of your body certainly would have knocked you out cold. Yugi was thankful, not for the first time, that his grandpa’s old collection of magic artifacts was full of unique pieces, including one blessed by patrons of healing from several religions.

For about the fiftieth time, Yugi dipped the washcloth into the bowl of hot water, wringing out the stomach-churning red. The apartment smelled like a crime scene and Yugi knew he’d have to shower for an hour to feel clean again, but at least you were alive. You looked sick, and Yugi watched you like a hawk to make sure your breathing didn’t stop, even though Anzu had warned that you’d probably look worse before you got better.

Once the washcloth was rinsed of blood he gently swiped it across your body again. He was trying to find a good balance between taking care of you, and not doing anything that might make you uneasy. He wanted to get the gore-soaked clothes off of you, put you in something clean, something comfortable so you didn’t have to wake in your own blood. He had even gathered a pair of his extra stretchy, soft sweatpants and oversized flannels to put you in, but the actual act of changing you felt too… Violating, too perverse despite the fact that no ill-acts were at work. As it was, he felt guilty that your shirt was nothing but a torn rag, leaving your chest bare as he tried to clean the red from your skin. Maybe you didn’t care, maybe you were used to this, being a warrior of sorts, but Yugi felt sick at the idea of crossing a line with you. In the end, he figured Anzu could change you, she was on her way there with a healer’s hut worth of herbs and spells to get you patched up, after all.

Another sniff that threatened to turn into a sob later and Yugi was finally done wiping your chest and stomach clean. You were still covered in marks from your battle, but at least this was better. He grabbed a blanket that was discarded on the ground (had Atem used it to shield himself from the sun?), made sure it was clean enough for you with a quick look over, then tucked it over your body for privacy and warmth.

Next, he moved on to your face, which was not nearly as messy, but some ash dirtied your skin under thin smears of blood. The vague memory of coming back to find Atem desperately holding your face with red-stained hands floated through Yugi’s mind as he dabbed the cloth over your cheeks with care.

That cleaning didn’t take long, and when he was done, Yugi suddenly found himself at a loss. What else could he do? Should he get you a glass of water for when you woke? Run a hot bath so you could slip into it at a moment’s notice? Tuck another blanket around you so you felt safe and protected while you healed? Hold you so you didn’t have to wake alone and pained and-

Yugi dug the heels of his hands into his eyes with a tired, defeated groan. He hated feeling useless, feeling like he could do nothing while the people he loved suffered. Again he had to swallow the sour taste of tears, knowing it wouldn’t do him any good now.

Then, before he could even think, he found his hands reaching out to gather yours. Your right arm was badly damaged, swollen and bruised, but your left seemed fine, and Yugi leaned in, lay your palm on his cheek as he silently thanked you for having the strength to come home to them, for surviving long enough for them to take care of you. An odd thing to think, perhaps, but Yugi allowed himself the moment of thanks, even moving his lips to press against your palm in gentle affection.

He lingered there for a few moments, comforted by the feel of your no longer fevered skin against his and watching your breaths get stronger and more even with every moment. Soon enough though, he forced himself to tuck your hand back under the blanket and get back to making himself useful. The living room floor was still a mess of broken glass and splintered wood, but first he took the bucket of blood-tinted water to the kitchen, and it was only when the red was streaking down the slope of the sink that he remembered someone else in distress.

Atem had taken off not long after they purged the poison from your body, his face looking sickly and pale. Yugi knew Atem might need space, and besides that his mind was preoccupied with taking care of you first, something Atem would understand. Now however, now that you were sleeping as soundly as you could, it was time to tend to his vampire.

It didn’t take long to find him, Yugi heard the sound of running water coming from the bathroom and padded over to the open doorway. Atem stood over the sink, steam pluming up from the hot water to fog up the mirror and porcelain and-

And Yugi froze when he saw scarlet coating the sink.

Atem was scrubbing his hands under the scalding water, nails digging in so much that the skin was tearing and healing rapidly before Yugi’s eyes. Not fast enough to stop the bleeding, though, and the ferocity of which Atem was scrubbing his hands and arms was causing red to pour like a waterfall.

“Atem!” Yugi rushed forward, “Stop- STOP!”

He tried to pry the vampire’s hands away, so desperate he almost dug his own claws into his lover’s skin. Atem only jerked out of his hold, eyes wild and panicked as he shied away from the incubus.

“What...what are you doing?” Yugi’s words were panted, trying to stay calm and only half succeeding as he approached Atem like a scared, injured creature.

Atem’s eyes were locked on his own hands, reproachful almost, but mostly enraged. “I can’t- I can’t get it off!” he raised them a little, still raw and bloody from the abuse, “No matter how much I try it won’t go away! I can still smell her blood on my hands, Yugi!”

He snatched a towel from beside the sink and started scrubbing at his hands again, but Yugi rushed forward and gripped them with as much gentle force as he could manage.

“Enough,” he said in a whisper, “that’s enough, Atem, please, please don’t hurt yourself.” With a tug, he pulled Atem close, held his vampire’s healing hands to his chest as he peppered reassuring kisses over Atem’s face. “It’s okay, everything’s okay.”

“No, no it’s not, Yugi!” a sob marred the words, and Yugi felt his heart break. “I can’t stand it, it makes me sick, just like the others.”

Yugi knew what ‘the others’ meant, remembered calming Atem down from nightmares, holding a sobbing vampire who was still haunted by the memories of killing when he wasn’t in control of his blood lust. It didn’t matter that it had been over a century since the last time he woke with a dead human in his arms, Atem still remembered them, still told himself he was a killer with blood on his hands that could never be washed clean.

Just like on the nights filled with those memories, Yugi held Atem close, whispered assurances in his ear, told him it wasn’t his fault, ignored the stabs to his heart when Atem told him it was.

“We almost lost her, Yugi.”

“But we didn’t.”

“I had her blood on my hands, in my mouth-”

“You saved her, Atem.”

Silence followed that, and for a long, long while they just stood there, clinging on to each other like a life line. Yugi tried to put forth some more gentle words, but Atem said nothing more, only pressed his face into Yugi’s chest with a sob so tired that Yugi had the urge to tuck Atem into bed too. He even suggested it, said that Atem could rest in the living room with you while he tended to you both, but the vampire just shook his head and held Yugi closer. That is until he finally pulled away with a sniffle.

Atem tucked his hands closer to himself, self-conscious, unsure. “You should get back into the living room, I think Anzu is here and she’ll want your help healing her wounds.”

He was right, not even a second later they heard the front door open and Anzu's worried voice calling out to them before she spotted you on the couch with a gasp. Still, Yugi stood there, eyeing his boyfriend’s hands with concern.

“Atem-”

“I’m okay, Yugi,” he assured, then sighed and gestured at the sink, “I won’t try that again, I promise. I just...I just need a minute to collect myself, that’s all.”

Yugi had learned to tell when Atem was lying long ago, but he knew Atem was being truthful now, so, he just stepped forward, cupped his hands to Atem’s face, and said, “You know we’re here for you, right?”

Atem actually managed a slight, tired, smile, “I know, Aibou, I know.” He leaned in and pecked Yugi’s lips, “Now go, help her.”

Finally somewhat assured, Yugi nodded and stepped out of the bathroom, back to the side of someone else who needed him. Still, Yugi was only fully assured when Atem joined them a few minutes later and started helping him and Anzu dress your wounds with poultices and spells.

[bigskydreaming]

“Fandom purity,” posts say mockingly on my dash for the umpteenth time, as if I haven’t spent years ranting about how actually, I have no problem with sex but just the specific choice to use sex as a weapon to violate the vulnerable, ie rape, incest and pedophilia, so always nice to know people are listening.

Look you can disagree with me on any subject ever, but that isn’t disagreement, that’s outright lying and gaslighting survivors: the choice to misconstrue stances SPECIFICALLY against rape, incest and pedophilia ie weaponized sex that does harm and CREATES SURVIVORS....as being anti-sex and a moral crusade against sex in fandom spaces because wont someone think of the children.

I mean, yeah, sue me, I think of the children and everyone the fuck else when I say I find the popular message of “I actually think the choice to twist sex into a weapon not to harm but VIOLATE the vulnerable is something that can be so exciting, so sexy” to be quite distressing to be around 24/7. And I don’t think its an obsession with purity that makes me think survivors shouldn’t have to be around that constantly in fandom spaces and with their every objection to it, even just “yikes this makes it super uncomfortable to be here” recast as a lack of sophistication, or the infantilizing belief that we’re simply too damaged by it to view sex as healthily and ‘fully’ as others do.

I mean I tend to think that’s the lowest fucking bar setting possible for basic human decency, but hey, guess that’s just me.

And I know, I know, you’re all not condoning rape with these fics, you can write something or even enjoy it without condoning it....

except.....

Weird thing is, if you ARE so confident that you’re not in any way condoning or validating the mindset of a rapist when writing and celebrating sexual fic in which the rapist’s mindset is upheld and agreed with as something sexy.....

Again....why the incessant need to reframe the situation as being about ‘pro-sex vs anti-sex’ instead of just people being like ‘again, its the specific choice to specifically use sex as an act of violation specifically that we think is bad, actually.’

Just curious.

Like.....I have expressed this a thousand times, and continue to do so: I have no problem with sex. 

Any sexual scene whatsoever, as long as you take out the specific context of one person making the choice to weaponize sex to violate another’s consent or to violate someone incapable of consenting without a form of coercion or from an at all comparable positioning within a power dynamic.....like, guess what? You just wrote sex between two consenting adults engaged in sex they made the choice to have with each other! Congrats! Go you! So exciting! 

Similarly, any scenes about rape, incest or pedophilia NOT made with the intent to uphold the aggressor’s choices as valid or to titillate readers with that choice being what’s viewed as sexually exciting.....I mean, I might find the hows of the scene unnecessarily graphic or exploitative, I might question whether the scene and the motivations for writing it might be shallow and not awesome, but I’m not objecting to that kind of content specifically, just critical of specific executions of it.

It is literally ONLY when RAPE is upheld as sexy, NOT when either sex OR rape is simply PRESENT, that I take issue. This is extremely basic math. This is a very simple fucking take. There should be NO way to misunderstand what I’m saying here. Because as we all know:

RAPE. IS. NOT. SEX.

So the repeated and consistent reframing of every objection people make to rape in fics written with the express intent of sexual gratification for the writer and/or readers....as objecting to sex, period?

You are LYING.

This is a blatant bait and switch, taking something that is perfectly understandable and valid and reasonable to hold as a stance, ESPECIALLY for survivors who have been victimized by rape.....

And misrepresenting it as an extreme position with no basis in any rationale whatsoever, and that threatens the free expression of exploring the human condition through fiction, with frequent callbacks to times when people have made similar crusades against sex with specific aims of cracking down on the sexual identities or explorations of women, LGBTQ+ individuals, people of color, etc....

EXCEPT OH WAIT. ITS NOT ACTUALLY SIMILAR AT ALL, CUZ REMEMBER THE PART WHERE ITS A BALD-FACED LIE AND ITS NOT ACTUALLY AN ANTI-SEX STANCE TO SAY HEY ACTUALLY MAYBE RAPE IS NOT SEXY?

And maybe, I’m just saying, but maaaaaaaaaaaybe if you can’t take the stance you do or write and read the fics you do without LYING to yourselves and others that any objections to it or criticisms of what fundamental messages it is upholding as sexy and thrilling, is like, a puritanical stance against sex in general, rather than the specific message of a violator’s view of sex as a weapon being valid and relatable.....

Maybe THAT’S the actual problem there, not the actual criticisms people raise.

But seriously, knock it the fuck off with the fandom purity posts, because it is a slap in the face to every single survivor who is damn well certain that their objections to this content spring from objecting to the RAPE in it being framed as hot and sexy, the specific choice to only USE sex as an instrument of violation, not that sex exists in it at all.

Rape is not sex. I know I’M perfectly fucking clear on that front, so when I also know that every single criticism I’ve made about this specific type of fic content has been a criticism and condemnation of views about RAPE and not sex, and everybody who responds or refers back to stuff I or like-minded people say treats it as criticisms and condemnations of SEX and not rape?

Someone’s fucking lying here, and I know its not me.

[ailelie]

That time everyone was super-invested in Obi-Wan’s love life

It starts like this: Palpatine says Obi-Wan will never understand Anakin because “he’s never been in love.” And Anakin thinks “You’re right.”

And it might have ended there, but then Anakin overhears one of Obi-Wan’s old friends teasing him for bending the rules once or twice in his youth. And Anakin thinks, “Why can’t Obi-Wan bend this rule? Then he’d understand me.”

...

“Why can’t Obi-Wan bend this rule?”

And thus begins Operation Help Obi-Wan Find Love.

The first person Anakin tells is Padme. 

Padme knows this is probably a bad idea, BUT! She also thinks that Jedi rules could use some re-evaluation and she wants Obi-Wan to be happy. He’s seemed more tense lately. This could help.

It will also be a fun distraction from the increasingly frustrating headache that is the Senate. So after a few “Are you sures?” and “We really shouldn’ts...” for propriety's sake, she’s 100% in. 

She and Anakin agree that this is too big a task for just them, so they’ll have to bring some others in. One rule: No Jedi and No telling Obi-Wan.

Anakin tells Rex. 

Padme tells Bail.

Rex tells Cody.

Padme and Bail use Obi-Wan as a cover conversation a few times when they think they’re about to be overheard.

...it all spirals out of control.

Within a week and a half, Dex hands Obi-Wan a coupon for a free dinner for two.

Senators hold more special events and insist on Jedi attendance so that they can interrogate Obi-Wan and direct him toward various choices.

A secret fan forum discusses prospects at length with pros and cons. Certain favorites become associated with particular colors or patterns leading to people subtly expressing their preferences.

No one tells the Jedi what’s going on. No one wants to wreck what has become a communal hobby and stress relief.

Obi-Wan is getting really tired of getting accidentally stuck in lifts or locked in rooms. He knows he is not this absent-minded or clumsy. What is going on? All he can sense from Anakin, though, is attentive happiness.

Because Anakin? He’s paying more attention to Obi-Wan than he has in years. Instead of taking reactions for granted, he is always mentally taking notes to share with Padme for their planning. This has the side effect of countering Palpatine’s narratives.

(Anakin blames himself. He’s given Palpatine a false image of Obi-Wan. He tries to correct this. Palpatine is really, really tired of hearing about Obi-Wan).

The Game, as it gets called eventually, is leaked to the Separtists. 

Obi-Wan would (a) really love to know how Darth Maul knows who he talked to at the latest required banquet, and (b) why he cares. 

Ventress spends a duel talking up a young Separtist general and tells Obi-Wan she can make him defect for him. 

Dooku lectures Obi-Wan on the qualities of a good romantic partner, the role of love in a Jedi life, or shares a story about Qui-Gon’s romantic affairs.

And again, Obi-Wan wants to know what the kriff is going on??

(Palpatine doesn’t mean to join in, but it is all anyone else talks about and unless he wants to go spend time with the damn Jedi, he has to have an opinion. He comforts himself by saying that having Obi-Wan in a relationship will drive him and Anakin further apart.)

Meanwhile, Anakin and Padme are inviting Obi-Wan over more often--sometimes because they’ve also invited someone they think he’ll like and sometimes because they’re sabotaging someone else and sometimes because they want to get to know Obi-Wan better so that they do a better job helping him find love.

And because I am OT3 trash, this leads to them accidentally falling for Obi-Wan.

Naturally, the moment they realize they’re in love with him is the moment he learns about the Game.

He is....not pleased. He thinks the galaxy has been laughing at his expense. He assumes Anakin and Padme have only been friendlier lately for selfish reasons. 

(He denies that he’s disappointed because he’d started thinking of them as more.)

(He denies that learning about the Game hurts worse than it could have because he’s afraid they’ve been treating him like a game and that isn’t what he wants).

Anakin complains to Palpatine. 

Palpatine has a choice--tip Anakin toward leaving Obi-Wan alone or recasting Obi-Wan’s hurt as rejection. Or...place bets everywhere he can on Anakin and Padme and clean up big. Sure it links Anakin and Obi-Wan more closely, but a Jedi who can fall in love is a Jedi who can Fall.

(Palpatine denies that he’s actually gotten caught up in this cursed game. He definitely does not have a stake in it at all).

Ultimately, Palpatine decides to encourage Anakin to chase after his desires without concern for consequences. That’s a Dark enough excuse to not divert him.

Not sure of the resolution. There are options.

Anakin and Padme announce their love to the online Game community and the galaxy comes together to either help them win Obi-Wan (or to sabotage them entirely. Obi-Wan ends up having to save the day).

Anakin and Padme chase Obi-Wan down and grovel privately. Anakin opens up to Obi-Wan with all the things he’s been afraid to share. Obi-Wan says they can try, as long as they take it slow.

Palpatine makes a comment to Obi-Wan about him pushing Anakin away out of fear. And it makes Obi-Wan think (even though he doesn’t want to; he wants to ignore and move past all of this). Then he either goes to Anakin and Padme privately or, giving into the ridiculous side he knows they both have, he hijacks the Game to get support from across the galaxy to help him win Anakin and Padme over.

And then happily ever after.

[the-bjd-community-confess]

You know, it will be 7 years ago this year when Culor spectacularly fucked up her reputation when she was trying to sell a recast as legit and lied about posting a recast on DoA.

You would’ve thought that after facing the kind of backlash that literally cost her everything (her fans, face up commissions, access to sales groups, etc) to the point she had to leave the doll community for a year and wipe all her social media and blogs just to start over, she would have learned her lesson. But I guess she didn’t learn a damn thing because, she now owes thousands of dollars worth of merchandise to people from her botched preorder all because she miscounted the number of dolls needed to be ordered. And instead of dealing with this maturely, she chose to falsely tarnish the reputation of her manufacturer to cover her ass and purposely avoiding people she owes dolls and faceplates on a private account. And I have no doubts in my mind she is hoping that people will forget what she did so she won’t have to deal with her responsibilities and run away again.

I’m going to be very honest when I say I really, really thought she’d grow up after the first time she screwed up everything. Hell, I really and truly did believe this after a while, but now seeing everything come out about this shit show of a preorder, I feel stupid to have given her the benefit of the doubt.

It’s a shame really, she really was talented, too bad it was wasted on a child who can’t even tell the truth.

~Anonymous

[duhragonball]

So the only two Terminator movies I hadn’t seen were Salvation and Dark Fate, which was why I bought this box set.  I was looking forward to T4, but wasn’t very impressed with it.   T6, on the other hand, yeah it’s pretty damn good.  But, like T4 and T5, this was also meant to be the first part of a reboot trilogy, and just like T4 and T5, it didn’t perform well enough at the box office to make that plan a reality.  

I don’t know what the future for this series holds.  The Wikipedia article for Dark Fate talks about plans to make a Terminator anime on Netflix, which sounds pretty stupid to me, but I thought that Sarah Connor Chronicles show was a bad idea, and I seem to recall it did okay.  People seem to think there’s money to be made off this franchise, but it feels like each new attempt ends in failure, sort of like how Skynet keeps trying the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. 

Just to recap...

T1: Kyle Reese travels back in time to protect Sarah Connor from a Terminator, so that her yet-to-be-born son can lead humanity to victory in the Future War.  Ironically, Kyle turns out to be the father of Sarah’s baby.  

T2: Skynet sends another Terminator to kill John Connor, but the Future John sends a reprogrammed Terminator to protect him.   Meanwhile, Sarah Connor is determined to prevent Skynet’s creation.

T3: John Connor thinks the Future War has been prevented, but he can’t quite believe it.   After surviving another Terminator attack, John realizes that Skynet’s rise to power is inevitable, and he reluctantly accepts his fate as the leader of the human resistance.

T4: Fifteen years after Judgment Day, John Connor has to save Kyle Reese from a Skynet plot to wipe out the Resistance.  

T5: Repeated time trips and assassination attempts have left the timeline from 1984 to 2029 unrecognizable.    Skynet captures John Connor in the future and converts him into a T-3000.   This new John is tasked with facilitating the rise of Skynet in 2017, but he is defeated by Sarah Connor, Kyle Reese, and a T-800 sent from the future by an unknown benefactor.

There’s a lot of details that prevent these movies from fitting together into a single storyline, but the broad themes still make for a good meta-narrative.  The first movie introduces Sarah and the central conflict, the second movie introduces John and provides an origin for Skynet.   The third movie depicts the worldwide nuclear strike that marks the beginning of the Future War.   The fourth movie shows us the middle of the Future War.   Finally, the fifth movie depicts the end of the war and the part where Kyle goes back in time to start the cycle again.   Circumstances change from one movie to the next, but you can chalk these up as the result of all the various time travelers.    I mean, a lot of people get killed in these movies, and they sort of act like it doesn’t matter much in the long run, but it could add up in a hurry.  

Knowing all of this about the first five movies, I was really curious to see what the sixth one would even be about, especially with Linda Hamilton returning as an older Sarah Connor.  She was dead in T3 and 4, and T5 recast the role and overhauled the character.  Of course, T6 just sort of pretends those three movies never happened, but even so, what else is there to do with Sarah?

Well, Dark Fate opens with John Connor getting shot in 1998.   In this movie, the effort to prevent Judgment Day in T2 was successful, but Skynet had sent multiple Terminators throughout the 1990s to hunt down John, and they kept looking for him even after Skynet itself ceased to exist.  

It’s a ballsy move, but it’s almost inevitable.   They literally did every other thing there was to do with this story.   It’s not even the first time John has died to a Terminator.   The T-850 in T3 did the honors in 2032, albeit off-screen.   In T5, Skynet decided that it had to team up with John in order to win, so it turned him into a Terminator.   I’m not sure if he was killed in that movie or not, but it might as well have been his death.    But those were future versions of John, and Skynet’s goal was always to kill him before he could defeat it, not after.   And so, T6 decided the only road left was to let the coyote catch the road runner.

So John’s dead and Skynet’s gone, so now what?   Well it turns out there’s another dark future down the road, and this whole formula plays out again.  This time, the bad guy is a “Rev-9″ Terminator, sent to kill Dani Ramos.   But the Rev-9 isn’t working for Skynet, it’s working for Legion, which is just another AI that became self-aware, took control of the world’s defenses, etc.  

Ramos’ protector from the future is a human “augment” named Grace Harper.   She looks cool and kicks ass but she’ll run out of gas if she doesn’t take her augment medicine.   Also, she isn’t powerful enough to beat the Rev-9.   Luckily, Sarah Connor steps in and offers to help, because she’s been hunting Terminators ever since John’s death, and because she knows what it’s like to be in Dani’s shoes. 

Over the years, Sarah’s been getting tips on where new Terminators will show up from a secret informant, and Grace’s orders are to proceed to a particular location if things go poorly, and it turns out that’s the same place where Sarah’s been getting her tips from.  They go there and find an old T-800 named Carl.   Carl’s the one who killed John in 1998, and afterward he had no purpose and no further instructions to follow.  He eventually studied human behavior and developed the AI equivalent of a conscience, then married a human wife and helped her raise her young son.  

Sarah still holds a grudge, but they need Carl’s help to survive, so they all join forces to have a big showdown with the Rev-9.   Grace and Carl sacrifice themselves to help Dani win, and the movie ends with Sarah promising to help Dani prepare for the future that’s to come.  

At first, Sarah assumed that Dani would be the mother of the eventual leader of the resistance against Legion, just as John was fated to lead the resistance against Skynet.  But eventually it comes to light that Dani herself will be the leader who saves the world, and Sarah realizes that she’s the new John.   I guess that’s Sarah’s character arc for this movie.   She loses her own son, spends the next 22 years without a purpose, and then she discovers a new purpose.   It also allows Carl to redeem himself for John’s murder.  Now that he’s grown a soul, he can choose to die for Dani instead of killing for a Skynet that no longer exists.   Grace’s arc is probably weaker than the others, but she initially saw the Rev-9 as a threat that could only be avoided and not defeated, but in the end she stood and fought, so I guess that’s good enough. 

More importantly to me, though, is that T6 serves as an answer to the previous film.   Skynet was obsessed with John Connor, like he was the only thing that allowed humanity to defeat it.    So in T5, Skynet decided that if it could just convert John to its side, it would be unbeatable.    That always struck me as silly, because without John Connor, someone else would have stepped in to fill the void.  And T6 demonstrates this by introducing Dani.   Legion and Skynet might as well be the same idea, but even without John Connor, there’s another human leader who can rise to the occasion.   And if something happened to Dani, someone else would step up, and so on.   

Skynet thought it could win the war by defeating John, but it’s reasoning was flawed: it had to defeat what John represents, and there isn’t a Terminator powerful enough to do that.   As long as it kept pursuing the man, it would never succeed.  It would have to kill every human to achieve the victory it craves, but it couldn’t seem to make that work either.

So with that conclusion reached, I really don’t see where else this franchise can go.    They could do a movie about Sarah and Dani fighting more Terminators, but that would just be a retread of the previous movies.  And the outcome is already understood to be pointless.  Either Dani will prevent Legion’s creation in the present-day, or she’ll tough it out and win the Future War in the 2040′s.  We know that’s inevitable, or Legion wouldn’t have sent a Terminator back in time in the first place. 

This reminds me a lot of my initial thoughts after seeing Genisys in 2015.   It seemed like Skynet was getting increasingly desperate to find away to avoid losing the war.   It couldn’t beat the humans on the ground, and time travel never seemed to help, and hijacking John Connor didn’t help either.    Now we see that killing John would make no difference either.  So it seems like the only option left would be for “The Machines” to sue for peace, or accept defeat.    I’m not sure that would make for a very good movie.  

That might be the only major flaw I see in T6.   The action’s great, and I never got bored watching it, and the story is compelling, and it’s a great sendoff for Arnold Schwarzenegger if he ever stops coming back for more of these movies.   But it’s also kind of redundant.   This movie just reinforces lessons already learned in previous movies.  

I really hope this is the last one.  I suspect that a lot of the themes that made T1 and T2 so successful have been superseded by other franchises.  You can get a lot of the same gonzo action sequences out of an Iron Man or Captain America movie, and the threat of “technology gone too far” isn’t exactly novel anymore.  There was a scene in T6 where Dani’s brother lost his job to a robot, and that seemed downright quaint.    They were doing stories about that in the 80s.   T6 does some thought-provoking stuff with the Border Patrol and their detention facilities, but I’m not sure we need a Terminator movie to cover that ground.   I’m not saying the Terminator movies aren’t allowed to get into social justice topics.   It’s been doing that for decades.   But it’s hardly unique in that respect.   By now, the question James Cameron and the others need to be asking is “What problem would a new Terminator movie solve?”  It’s not going to be a financial success, and critics probably won’t like it.   So what are we going for here?  I’m not sure there’s been a good answer in a long time.