#i can't stop thinking about it tho

[gazingatmydoom]

opening a fromsoft game and immediately seeing the words "at the end of the previous session. exit game (system menu) may not have been selected.

failure to end session with exit game may result in loss of progress" and i'm like ahhh so i rage quit. it's like a warning sign popping up like hey buddy whatever u were doing last time? it fucking sucked and u got mad be prepared

[teaboot]

if ur a murderbot nerd now do u have any fun opinions abt it yet?

Oh my goddd you have no idea

I really, really, really like Murderbot because it comes at life with this perspective we don't often see that is very real among people who have already been through traumatic experiences, who developed skills and abilities to suvive that were once useful but no longer have context- that search that traumatized people go through to recalibrate and reorient ourselves in a world where we no longer really need those things to survive.

A bit personal here, but my own issues personally involved a lot of psychological abuse that made it difficult to trust my own perceptions of reality, and as a result I found I was very easy to lie to and manipulate.

To handle this, I became obsessive over writing things down, cataloging details and making notes of things as they happened- I'd carry recording devices and make audio recordings and stay up late at night to transcribe what they'd picked up, read those over and over again to reassure myself of things I wasn't certain about.

While doing this, there were others close to me that I felt responsible for, who I had to protect from others and protect myself from at the same time. Life was about two things: Evidence, and defusing threats

Over time, I learned to trust myself as my memories matched what had been recorded where their narrative didn't, but I never really kicked the habit. Like Murderbot, I had added something to my own programming that reassured me I was safe, that I was in control of myself, that I couldn't be mistaken or crazy or broken or used.

I'm only on book two, but already I see myself in Murderbot again. No spoilers here, but when I left home- left that dangerous context- I didn't need to repeat these patterns to survive anymore, but I still did, because I didn't know anything else anymore. It felt safe, comfortable, knowing knowing that the past couldn't repeat itself, because I'd written that flaw- blind trust in myself-  out of my programming and replaced it with something else.

Still, though, I'd become something specially suited to thrive in a very specific environment. Nothing else felt right like followinghigh-risk situations, like witnessing and watching and recording and knowing I had proof of the truth where others might not.

People took notice. I wound up in security by accident, but's an environment that I thrive in due to the same patterns and behaviours I originally developed when I had no other choice. I climbed the ladder pretty quickly, once supervisors caught on that my reports were the most accurate, most objective, most factual, detail-oriented and timely. I keep others and myself safe and prioritize public safety above all else, and I perform well under pressure

Now I'm in a position where I often wonder, do I enjoy this job, or is it just what I'm good at? I have a set of skills now, but do I have the option of choosing not to use them? What would I be, if not this? Could I be anything else? Can Murderbot be anything else?

It has a set of skills that set it apart, make it different, special. It does what it knows best. But is it free? Does it want to be? What does it want? Does it have to do what it was built to do? What if it didn't?

I know what I'm good for. The idea of deliberately leaving what I'm good for for something uncertain, that I might hate, that I might be useless at- the choice to give up what was so important to me for so long and become deliberately obsolete?

Let go of my entire purpose? The only thing I know, that I fit so well into but don't actually know if I enjoy? Now that I can choose? Now that enjoyment is a luxury I can afford to consider?

Yeah, that resonates.

I like the Murderbot series so far because it feels the way I feel: Like the most significant and formative part of my story, the part where I became what I am, has already happened

And now I have to just. Keep going

Into... what?

It feels absurd. Like a microwave giving up on reheating food and deciding to start a life around abstract dance.

So, uh. Yeah. It's really very wild to see this same philosophical-ish dilemma I've been digging over in the back of my mind and in therapy for the last forever laid out so plainly in a genuinely exciting and enjoyable story like this. I feel much less alone, and I... kind of really need to see how it resolves, I think.

So, uh. Yeah. Read Murderbot, I guess

[theladyyavilee]

can we like, talk about how in the coming out scene, there is this space between buck and eddie right? safe space, but still space, space to keep them safe?

and like rewatching today I noticed that they both reach into that space, they reach for each other, but like? at different times?

if they reached at the same time, their hands would touch? but they reach at different times, when in the conversation they are reaching out to the other all 'hear me, see me, HEAR ME and hear what I am saying to you' (buck with the I am bi and eddie with the you are loved)

but they

they don't reach at the same time

and I'm *screams into hands* I feel a certain way about that okay, can we talk about that? something about that makes me feel SOOOOOOOOO!!!! like, yes it makes perfect sense for the scene and what they are saying but also if this is foreshadowing I am going to throw myself into the sun for real 😭

(they do end up hugging right in that space to, so there's also that 😌)

[saysomethinglikethis]

Bed Friend อย่าเล่นกับอนล Episode 6 #tongues

[necrotic-nephilim]

there is not enough femslash in batcest circles. the girls deserve to be just as weird about each other as the boys are. if BruDick gets to be weird father/son/brothers/lovers/friends/rivals/soulmates then it is only fair that Babs/Cass get to be mother/daughter/sisters/lovers too. Something about that deep intrinsic but undefinable love that is born out of trauma, especially if you consider Cass not knowing what healthy love looks like in the first place. i think it's fun and deserves just as much fandom content.

besides that, you can get even more niche with rarepairs like Helena/Steph. Huntress/Spoiler: Blunt Trauma is already a fantastic comic and even though it's their only real canon interaction it has so much potential. very comparable to TimJay in how Helena tries to get Steph to understand her morals and the corruption you could play with it.

batman: huntress/spoiler: blunt trauma (1998)

that comic also highlights on how both Steph and Helena are outcasts of the Batfamily and don't have the approval of Bruce to be doing what they do in "his city". I think there's so much Potential in Helena taking Steph under her wing because Bruce won't let her in and it becomes a weird codependent toxic sapphic mess. I think the protectiveness Helena feels over Steph from the get-go is so clear and the way she wants to look out for Steph, wants to make sure Steph understands the real world? I love them. Helena should be allowed to steal Steph, actually. I think it'd be fun.

there are a lot of other possibilities too like Babs/Steph or even getting weird with Helena Bertinelli/Helena Wayne and the existential question of "is it selfcest or not." But these two specifically live in my head rent-free, especially Helena/Steph and one day I'll convince everyone else to ship it too.

[agentpenguinmann]

so they really said "he's a dad first and a spy second" with these covers huh

[thefloatingstone]

I really want to draw something meaty and put some characters into The Situations but I am dealing with a double whammy of art block and some REALLY insane migraine/Sinus issues the past 3 or 4 days.

So all I managed was a quick Solana. I wanted to give her a cool leg prosthetic but then I didn't really draw her legs sdjfdsjkfsdhf So that's the level of cognitive function I am dealing with at the moment

Fun fact! I really dislike a lot of the female turian design! So I just... ignored the parts I disliked lol.

[kierans-crow]

nothing top surgery and a bottle of ibuprofen can't fix

[worstloki]

something very horrifying about the concept of Thor but not Loki being told that Loki is Jotun when the brothers are old enough to understand the importance of the secret

[hualianista]

it's great that basira never became a cop in this universe, having not even thought about it, but it does make me wonder about daisy....is she still the same? did she also not become a cop, is she working somewhere else? is she still the same angry, corrupt cop? did daisy and basira ever meet? is daisy even called daisy in this universe, or is she just alice tonner? did everything that happened in her childhood happen all the same, did she still get her daisy scar...... questions questions idk i guess seeing basira doing alright made me miss her

[pourcap]

remember when laurent and damen had sex for the first time and laurent begged damen in a "fractured voice" to come inside him? my hc is that eventually, as laurent gets more and more comfortable with sex because damen is 1) great in bed and 2) just an overall great human being with tons of emotional intelligence and an endless amount of love for laurent, laurent embraces his sexuality and enjoys sex so much that damen, who has once spent 7 hours pleasing someone, can barely keep up anymore <3

[thegrimeandthearkhon]

I hope Jacob Anderson's Louis de Pointe du Lac knows he's my favorite boy ever.

[flying-cat]

It was crazy watching bkdk go from the most hated ship to the most popular ship in the fandom

[chase-ing-shadows]

I can’t stop thinking about bear Atreus and Sindri

[localcryptid-acelegend]

I watched Good Omens

[nanaarchy]

My friends are watching TMA, about halfway through season 2 (so jon is still upkeeping his "I Am Elegant and Respectable" persona), but they haven't seen ANY fanart. and they have described Jon as:

"tall"

"elegant"

"handsome"

"very pale"

"short hair probably"

"he deserves respect"

"painfully british blond"

"depressed emo anime protagonist"

"malnourished but still kinda hot"

They also immediately called Martin "very small" which is