#i dont ever think i was meant to live a full life | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

catacombbee · 3 months

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welcome home (i missed you dearly)

tyden tattoo shop au; crossposted on ao3:

INSPIRED BY A POST @the-killies MADE

just mentioning beforehand they are older in this bc they are adults bc tyler has a tattoo shop BUT the way tylers thinking abt aiden isnt meant to be sexy hes just thinking aiden is very very pretty boy okay this isnt supposed to be horny okay pls dont make it horny 🔫

sometimes theres just the desperation to touch someone to feel someone to be near someone. so im totally projecting

also i dont know exactly how tattoo shops work if anything is inaccurate SHHHH dangles gay in front of you to distract. does the distraction dance

It had been two years since Tyler had seen Aiden.

Sure, they kept in touch. The group chat was more alive than ever even after they all graduated. Life drew them in their own different directions, but they'd always be friends.

And yet it had been two years since all six of them met up in the same place. They had gotten together to celebrate most of their respective college graduations. Taylor had been working at a mechanic shop for over a year at this point, and her boss loved her friends so much that he ordered pizzas for them to celebrate. Of course they ended up back in the graveyard, sitting together in that bus as they ate and laughed and fell asleep on each other.

Tyler had made friends in art school that filled the gap that was left when he didn't see his five best friends every day. No, they'd never replace the others, but he felt less alone. By the time he graduated, he and two of his new friends really wanted to open their own tattoo shop together.

Taylor pointed out that the building beside her shop had been empty for sale for years. Tyler thought it was pretty funny that even into his career he couldn't get away from his sister. It was great, by all means. He got a discount on car maintenance, and they got a discount on their tattoos. It also meant he got the honors of giving Taylor her first tattoo himself. TH + AB inside a heart was pretty sappy, but he didn't tell her that when he did it. He was happy she was happy.

And he was happy. He was thriving. Ever since he gave up baseball, accepting that it wasn't making him happy like it used to, and let himself embrace his creativity, he felt so much more comfortable in himself. Who knew that art scholarships were a thing?? Why had no one told him??

But now he was living on his own and making enough money to not only support himself but pay for his mom's therapy. She was doing better, too; Taylor hadn't moved out when Tyler did, opting to stay living at home to take care of her. Now all three of them were moving uphill. Tyler was happy, he was secure, the tattoo shop was busier than ever. Everything was great.

And then Aiden Clark walked through the door.

Tyler wouldn't say he was disappointed to see him. No, far from it. In fact, he was far happier to see the blond than he would let himself admit. While most of the group was in college, Aiden had taken his parents money and gone who the hell knows where. Italy, France, Germany, Japan, other countries that Tyler couldn't remember, he saw it all. Along the way, he'd posted almost every bit of his journey online for people to live vicariously through him. At least, that's what Ashlyn called it. People loved watching him not only traverse beautiful landscapes, but also explore other cultures and share stories from people he'd met.

That meant that, as Aiden built an online following large enough to support himself without his parents' help (which in hindsight was probably his goal), Tyler got to watch through a screen as he did all sorts of impressive or death defying feats. Because of course he did. He's Aiden.

It's one thing to watch someone in full scuba gear get locked in a shark tank. It's another to watch him set up a camera and jump off of a cliff into water shirtless.

There were a lot of videos where he ended up shirtless, actually. A byproduct of his love for being in the water. Surfing, swimming, snorkeling- why did so many of those words start with an S anyway? Aiden did it all. And he did half of it wearing nothing from the waist up.

Seeing Aiden shirtless made Tyler's heart flutter every time-

"Tyler!" Aiden broke him from his thoughts. Fortunately. Instead of thinking about how nice he looked in his videos, Tyler could focus on how nice he looked standing right in front of him.

"Aiden," he responded, the second half of the name coming out like a bark as Aiden slammed into him with a bear hug. "It's so great to see you!" He said, squeezing Tyler not tightly enough to take his breath away as much as he did. "How have you been?"

He had been absolutely horrible before he saw Aiden. What the hell was he doing that would dare compare to this man wrapping himself around Tyler like he was never as overjoyed as he was now seeing him again?

"I've been great."

Aiden let go and stepped back. Unfortunately. He grinned up at Tyler, who was still proudly taller. "You look great. I mean, I saw you in some of the pictures posted on your place's Insta, but you look even better in person, yknow? Your tattoos are so cool woah-"

Tyler was much too distracted by the sound of his heart thudding in his ears to pay much mind to Aiden poking and prodding at his arms excitedly. He was blabbering something about how he couldn't wait to have a tattoo of his own- wait, what?

Shaking himself back to reality, Tyler pulled his arm back. It was the only way he'd focus: without Aiden's hands on his skin. "Are you here to get a tattoo?" He'd thought Aiden was just visiting. Why wouldn't he just visit? Ben came by to visit and didn't get a tattoo. Logan came by to visit and didn't get a tattoo. Ashlyn-

"Yeah! I already know kind what I want, too." Of course he did. "Oh, is it okay if I record some of it?" Of course it was. "I don't know if you follow my channel that much, I just wanted to show them the process." Of course. "Plus! I can say HEY here's this cool place! So if you're in the area and you want a tattoo, come see my buddy Tyler!" Of course.

And he wanted Tyler to give him the tattoo. And he wanted it on his back. Wings. Of course. Of course Aiden wanted a large tattoo on his back. Of course Aiden wanted Tyler to sit for hours and look down at his naked torso and have to focus on not screwing up the ink just because his client is pretty. He had tattooed pretty men before! This did NOT have to be any different.

But they weren't Aiden.

Aiden came with some reference photos. He and Tyler came up with a design Aiden liked. It wasn't that elaborate, but it was still going to be time consuming. Unfortunately.

Aiden was lying on his stomach, humming contentedly to himself as he scrolled through his phone, his arm dangling off of the table. Beside him stood Tyler, who was focusing so hard on his art.

Frankly, this was the longest he'd ever seen Aiden sit still. Even when he was asleep, he was such a wiggle worm. Sure, he remembered Taylor said once that she saw Aiden sleep completely still once, but he didn't want to think about that night.

On second thought, maybe that would be better. Maybe if he thought about the night Aiden died he wouldn't think about all the perfectly toned muscle that was right there. How many nights had he laid awake in bed, only his phone lighting the room, watching those videos of Aiden and imagining how it'd feel to wrap his arms around him? How many nights had he rolled over, his arms snug tightly around the middle of a pillow, so that when he closed his eyes he could imagine it was Aiden's waist instead?

How much longer could he deny that he wanted more than anything to be close to him?

After what felt like a year or maybe two minutes, they were halfway done. He'd told Aiden upfront that he'd need to come back again to finish it, which was fine. He had an opening the next day. Aiden was too eager to return. His smile was burned in Tyler's vision much like spots swimming in one's eyes after looking at a bright light.

Taylor came over to see him after work. Tyler was busy scrolling through his phone and definitely not thinking about a certain blond. "Aiden stopped by to say hi today."

"Mhm."

"He showed me his half-finished tattoo."

"Mm."

"You need to tell him you love him."

"Mhm."

Taylor punched him in the arm. Ow. She was fucking strong. "Tyler, c'mon." He finally made himself look up at her from where he was sitting. "We all knew it years ago, and here you are still acting like you don't care."

Tyler rolled his eyes. "Don't care what, that he's back? Of course I care that he's back, he's my friend."

She looked at him unamused. "You sure don't look at each other like you're friends," Taylor argued.

Well, what the hell did she know?

Tyler grumbled to himself the entire drive home. He sulked about it as he sat down to watch tv. He moped as he laid in bed, trying to sleep. He dreamed about it, Aiden's laugh echoing throughout his subconscious. He grumbled yet again as he trudged into into work the next day.

Aiden was back late that afternoon.

Surely he must have noticed the way Tyler was avoiding eye contact. The way he practically mumbled in response to Aiden trying to spark a conversation. The way his hand shook as it pressed against his back for the first time that day.

"Don't fuck up my tattoo, halfwit," Aiden grumbled playfully, turning his head to try and look up at Tyler.

He just smiled in response. "It's been a while since you called me that."

Aiden shrugged, earning a scolding from Tyler who was about to put the needle back to his skin. "Well, it's been a while since we've seen each other. I missed you."

Tyler's hands paused. Only for a second.

"I missed you too," he admitted. He really, really had. Far more than he would admit. He missed that manically brilliant grin, knowing something mischievous was soon to follow. He missed the way he laughed, the way he always knew what to say to get on everyone's last nerve, the way he masterfully turned the attention onto himself to distract from whatever was going on around them.

He missed how close they were when they saw each other every day; it gave him more chances to get close to Aiden.

"Why wings?" He blurted out, desperate to change the mental subject to something that did not include wishing he could wrap his arms around Aiden and ask him never to leave again, or worse, to beg him to let Tyler come too.

Aiden hummed, wiggling, despite however many times Tyler had told him off. He was either really lucky that he never made Tyler mess up or he was really good at moving only when he couldn't mess Tyler up. It was impossible to tell.

But of course, he stilled when Tyler leaned back in to continue his work. "Wings are a symbol of freedom, right?" He said, leaving it at that.

Tyler could feel the smile through his words, but he knew there were layers to this sort of symbolism. Freedom from the phantom dimension. Freedom from his parents, to whatever extent it hurt. Freedom from this little town. Freedom to explore the world to his heart's content.

Aiden wanted the world, and Tyler wanted to be his world. But he knew he'd never be enough to satisfy such a deep-rooted wanderlust.

Maybe Aiden was more like his parents than he'd like to admit. They, too, could never stay in one place for too long. They stayed in the house Aiden was living in through high school just long enough for him to leave the house, and then they were gone again. Ashlyn liked to tease that she preferred her new neighbors because they kept to themselves.

How deeply rooted was the Clarks' need to stay on the move? In fleeing the country to both satisfy his own desires and to escape association with his parents, how much was Aiden solidifying how alike they really were? How much did it bother him, or did it at all?

Tyler wondered so many things, and voiced none of them.

But perhaps he wasted too much time thinking and didn't spend enough of it actually talking. The tattoo was finally finished. It was late afternoon, and Tyler had no other appointments that day. Aiden was paying. He was leaving. He was about to leave, and Tyler was about to not see him again for another two years.

Tyler couldn't let that happen.

"Hey," he said suddenly, as Aiden was digging his wallet out of his pocket. "How much longer are you going to be in town?" Because if you aren't busy, we can meet up. Because if you're still here, we can go out somewhere together. Because if you're not leaving, I still have time.

Aiden shrugged. "I was gonna stay for a few more days originally, but my hotel didn't have any vacancy past tonight. I'm gonna sleep in my car and head out tomorrow morning."

Tyler's heart dropped into his stomach. Aiden was leaving tomorrow. Aiden was going to walk out that door and be gone and Tyler wouldn't know how long it would be until he saw him on the same side of the screen again.

That's why he blurted out: "Stay at my place."

Both men stared at each other, dumbfounded, neither really expecting Tyler to suggest such a thing. Aiden's eyes were wide, his tanned cheeks ever so slightly rosy. Tyler wondered if he was imagining it.

"Okay," Aiden said, his grin impossibly wider.

That's how Tyler ended up driving home with Aiden reclining in his passenger side seat. Did he insist that Aiden could just follow him home in his own car? Yes. Did Aiden somehow convince him to just let him throw all his stuff in his backseat and hitch a ride and leave his car parked outside the tattoo shop? Yes. Unfortunately.

The radio was on low; nothing that interesting was playing. Tyler could hear his own voice randomly stopping and starting from Aiden's phone. Sometimes while he was still working on the tattoo, Aiden would hold his phone up, video already rolling, saying "cheese!" and earning a glare from Tyler. Probably for the "I got a tattoo" video. A few times he even got Tyler to stop and take a quick shot of the progress, which was preferable as it kept Aiden from moving as much.

Why did Tyler suggest this. Why did Tyler suggest this. Tyler lived in a one bedroom home, all by himself, and the couch was probably fine but not comfortable enough to SLEEP on WHY did Tyler suggest this. Why did Tyler bring Aiden home. Why was Tyler helping Aiden bring his things inside and showing him around the place.

"So you live by yourself now?" Aiden asked cheerfully as he helped himself to a formerly unopened bag of chips. "That's cool. I thought you and Taylor would've still been living together but this is also cool. I guess since you work next door you need time apart, right? I wish I was still this close to Ben. He doesn't like moving around a lot, I'm happy he found a place he's comfortable." Aiden never stopped talking, and Tyler didn't want to stop him.

"Taylor's still living with Mom," Tyler said, shrugging. "We aren't really living apart cus we needed more space, I just..." How could he put into words that he couldn't stand the vacant look in his mother's eyes anymore? Even as she was doing better, how could he admit he couldn't handle the aching emptiness of that old home?

But Aiden nodded even despite the lack of an explanation, and Tyler understood that it wasn't actually needed.

That was another thing he loved-

That was another thing he enjoyed about Aiden. For all the nonstop chatter that came from him, he was actually a remarkable listener. Sometimes Tyler really struggled to put things into words, but Aiden didn't need him to. He was good at reading between the lines, and Tyler was grateful for that.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Aiden's stomach rumbling so loudly he wondered if he'd eaten at all that day. It was so stupid, he couldn't help but laugh.

The deer-in-headlights wide-eyed look on Aiden's face made Tyler laugh even harder. "I'm just going to cook some spaghetti. Think you can wait that long? And stop with the chips, you need real food."

Aiden threw the clip from the chips at Tyler; he caught it. "Shut up, I forgot lunch."

"That's not my fault," he shot back, gesturing at him with the box of spaghetti noodles. The now open box of spaghetti noodles. A small clump of uncooked noodles flew out, falling at Aiden's feet. "But that was!" He responded, picking them up and taking a bite of one. Tyler cringed.

Aiden was quiet as Tyler started cooking. Fortunately. He did chime in when Tyler was putting the pasta in the pot, shrieking until he agreed to not snap the spaghetti. Because what was he, a fucking barbarian? No, only heathens snap their spaghetti. Tyler was eager to point out to Aiden that he did the same until he visited Italy.

"It's a JOKE!" Aiden insisted through a mouthful of pasta, since Tyler had yet to drop the matter even now that they were eating. "It's a silly thing like, 'oh no! My Nonna is rolling over in her grave because you're breaking your pasta!' I don't think people actually care that much."

Tyler raised an eyebrow at him as he noisily slurped up yet another mouthful of spaghetti. He snickered, wiping his mouth. At least he had the decency to use a napkin. "Well, I like it long. It's more fun. So I guess I care."

Never again would Tyler Hernandez break pasta. At least not when he was cooking for Aiden.

Dinner wasn't very eventful, unless you counted the fact that Tyler was sitting across from Aiden Clark and talking to him and having dinner with him alone sitting in his house for the entire night. But no, no big deal. Just two guys being friends, hanging out. Two bros sitting at a table, five feet apart-

Aiden was right next to Tyler, wrapping an arm around his shoulders in a quick side hug. "Thanks for dinner!" Tyler just stared at him, because oh, now he's very close and smiling down at him. And now he was walking away with his and Tyler's plates in hand. "I'll clean up since you cooked."

That brought Tyler back to reality. "You're my guest, you don't need to do that. And don't thank me for feeding you, that's literally the bare minimum."

He was ignored; the clinking of plates being washed began as the tap came on in the kitchen sink. Tyler just sighed and allowed it. If Aiden insisted on cleaning dinner up, Tyler could busy himself with finding something for them to do afterwards, at least. After all, it wasn't that late at night; they needed something to do.

There was a dusty box of video game cases. Tyler hadn't played Mario Kart in ages.

That turned out to be the best idea he'd had all day. He could barely begin suggesting the idea to Aiden before the controller was snatched from his hands and a certain blond planted himself on the sofa, staring intensely at the screen, waiting for Tyler to start the game.

There were too many characters to pick from; Tyler always tried a different one every time. This time he picked Rosalina, earning a curious glance from Aiden. On the complete other side of the character selection spectrum, Aiden IMMEDIATELY beelined for Waluigi. His entire cart was built and ready before Tyler even decided which character he wanted.

It'd been a long time since they played together, but Tyler knew how Aiden played. Normally selecting the Mii character to play as someone like Sans, but settling for Waluigi because he knew Tyler wouldn't have his weird characters saved. All speed, not great handling. As for Tyler, he preferred putting more into acceleration than speed. What's the use in being fast if it takes you too long to speed up when you crash into shit?

And his performance proved him right. Or it proved that Aiden's Mario Kart skills were rusty and he had circled right back to noob status. Tyler won time and time again, all his time playing with Taylor when she came over for sleepovers paying off.

He let Aiden end on a high note, though. There was no way he was going to go easy on him, of course; he figured Aiden must've finally got the hang of the game again when he won the last round. "YES!" He yelled, pointing a finger right in Tyler's face. "I finally got you!"

Tyler let him have it, considering how miserably he did in the very first races. "Alright, you got me."

Aiden giggled. He giggled. And he smiled right at Tyler. Unfortunately.

"It's late," Tyler said, looking away. They'd been playing for a couple of hours at this point. It felt like they'd just sat down. "I'm not letting you stay up all night before driving for hours."

Confusion growing on his face, Aiden watched as Tyler set up a pillow and blanket on the couch. "Am I sleeping out here?"

"No, of course not. You're sleeping in my room." Did Aiden really expect to be left on the couch??

Aiden just grinned at him. "You don't have to sleep on the sofa, Ty."

It was hard to ignore the way his heart fluttered. This man was going to be the death of him. He just had to survive one more night. Surely. "I'm sure as hell not making you sleep on the sofa. Especially with a healing tattoo, you need to rest on something comfortable, dude."

But Tyler had misunderstood exactly what Aiden was getting at. "Tyler, I don't care if we share the bed, yknow."

Oh. Tyler hoped that the way his face burned wasn't visible. He never would have expected Aiden to suggest such a thing. Why would Aiden suggest such a thing? Why wouldn't Aiden suggest such a thing, actually? Why did it matter? It shouldn't matter. They were friends. Friends could share a bed. Surely.

That's how Tyler found himself laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, as Aiden scrolled on his phone to his right. He had tucked a pillow securely under his chest to prop himself up, whatever app he was using casting a soft glow on his face. Tyler couldn't help but look a few times. Just a few.

This was all made worse by the fact that Aiden was laying there on his stomach shirtless. It took Tyler dragging him back to the bathroom after they both showered and forcing him to sit down for him to remember that, yes, his tattoo needed proper attention of its own. And now there he was, lying on his stomach so as to not irritate his back, and his phone was lighting up the sleepy grin on his face. Unfortunately.

"Go to sleep," Tyler grumbled, as if the light was bothering him. It wasn't the light itself keeping him up, though. How could he sleep with this man lying a foot away from him?

Aiden grumbled back, putting his phone on the nightstand. "You don't have enough pillows. I need, like... three."

"What the fuck do you need three pillows for." Tyler only had two! The only person that slept over was Taylor, and she brought a sleeping bag and pillows for herself; she, too, didn't want Tyler giving up his bed just for her.

The response was punctuated by a scoff, as if Aiden was offended that Tyler wouldn't know why Aiden needed three damn pillows. "I need something under my stomach and my head to be comfortable on my stomach."

Then he should have brought his own. "You can't have my pillow."

"Can I just lay on you instead?"

Once again, Aiden said something that left Tyler stunned and defenseless. The room went silent as he couldn't come up with an answer that didn't sound as desperate or excited as the thought made him feel inside.

Aiden took his silence for rejection. "I was, joking, uh-"

"Yes. Uh, yeah you can. If you want to."

Silence again. This time much less uncomfortable. Slowly, tentatively, Aiden shifted closer. Placed an arm on Tyler's other side, holding himself up. Lowered himself to settle against Tyler's chest, tucking into his shoulder.

They both let out a long breath as they fell into place together. It was as if whatever anxious walls they'd put up crumbled and vanished as their bodies moved on their own, suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to be closer. Aiden's leg looped under Tyler's. Tyler's arms settled around Aiden, Aiden's latched together under Tyler's back.

Aiden's head tilted back, his gaze meeting Tyler's. They were close, too close. Unfortunately.

Or maybe it wasn't a bad thing. Aiden was searching his face, a calm smile adorning his face. Tyler stared right back, unable to stop himself from glancing at that pretty smile, wondering what it'd feel like pressed against his own lips.

Aiden noticed; he smiled a little brighter. It suited him, that natural smile. That smile for Tyler. How could he deny any longer his own feelings when Aiden was smiling like that? Smiling like that just for him? How could he deny his own feelings when it was so clear suddenly that Aiden felt the same?

"Aiden?" He said softly, eyes unable to focus on just Aiden's eyes or just Aiden's lips, bouncing between the two. He just hummed in response, staring back with a level of focus that was surprising for him.

"I- I want to kiss you," Tyler blurted out.

Aiden giggled, his eyes nearly closing as laughter took over his body. Tyler's face burned, and he scowled even despite knowing that he was just being teased. "Aiden."

"Can I tell you a secret?" He responded, managing to cease his snickering. Tyler just stared, waiting.

Aiden leaned close, suddenly serious. Tyler couldn't keep up with the mad facade for much longer, given that he could feel Aiden's breath on his face. This was the closest they'd ever been, at least that Tyler could remember. He'd lean in and end his suffering if he weren't waiting on Aiden to go on with what he wanted to say.

"I lied about the hotel," Aiden whispered, "so you'd invite me over."

Then Aiden kissed him. And Tyler was too blissfully reduced to mush to even get mad at the realization that this entire situation only happened because Aiden was banking on Tyler suggesting he stay over instead of sleeping in his car.

Now Aiden was gripping Tyler's shirt like he'd disappear if he opened his eyes, Tyler was running his hand through Aiden's hair and pulling him ever closer, and neither of them wanted it to end. Finally, finally, Aiden was his.

Who cared what would happen tomorrow, or a week from now? Who cared what they'd do when Aiden had to leave again? Tyler was firmly rooted at home, and Aiden was endlessly roaming without a constant one. But that was tomorrow's problem.

Tonight Aiden was his. And he wasn't letting go.

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lovelytsunoda · 1 year

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the poolhouse // clement novalak (mini fic)

summary: after watching her boyfriend film a tiktok for his podcast, y/n and clement escape to the pool house to spend some quality time together.

pairing: clement novalak x female reader

warnings: clement being a lovesick idiot (but most importantly, respecting his beloveds sexual boundaries!), consumption of alcohol, oral sex (female receiving)

the way that clement novalak moved was criminal.

the sun was setting beyond the palms as the group sat in marcus armstrong's backyard in new zealand, clement and james in the pool, attempting to film a tiktok to promote screaming meals.

time after time, clement launched himself out of the water, tossing his hair back like an actor in some eighties movie (although if she was ever forced to choose between her boyfriend and dirty dancing-era patrick swayze, she was picking patrick swayze).

the pair were so different that nobody thought the relationship would work. clement was outgoing and always needed to be doing something, and y/n was soft and gentle, and would rather stay home with a book. in addition to these differences, they also had vastly different sex drives. clement could get it up whenever and wherever, whereas it took some time for y/n, and her libido was more responsive than clem's. but they made it work, even if it meant scheduling sex into their calendars at least once a month.

but watching clem in that swimming pool? oh yes, her body was very responsive to that.

clem ambled out of the pool, using his fingers to slick his hair back over his scalp. fingers that she suddenly wished were inside her as she choked on her glass of water.

he slipped onto the lounger next to her, and y/n wasted no time throwing one leg over his and resting her head against his damp chest.

“hey, darling. did you miss me that much?” Clem chuckled, pulling her close and kissing her softly.

she whispered his name softly, running her hand over his bare chest. “clem, i need you.”

“is this a now problem, or can it wait until we get home, love?” given the often erratic nature of their sex life, clement tried to avoid quickies when he could, as he would much rather take his time giving his lover the full princess treatment.

“havent quite figured that out yet.” y/n mumbled, kissing clems cheek before getting up from the lounger. “i do, however, need a stronger drink. care to come with?”

“anything for you, pretty lady.”

the couple walked hand in hand towards the poolhouse, giggling and laughing to each other as james and marcus gave each other a look.

it was rare that they were ever around a couple who loved each other as much as clement and y/n. marcus was taking bets on when they’d stop beating around the bush and get married to each other.

they slipped inside the pool house, which felt like a large living room and kitchen. clement went straight for the exotic fruit tray on the counter, popping a small chunk of pineapple into his mouth while his lover filled the blender with ice.

“want a bite?” clem offered, holding out a pineapple slice.

“sure.” y/n agreed, sliding the ice tray back into the freezer. “do you want a pina colada?”

“I’ll just steal yours.” clem shrugged as he lover leaned over the kitchen island, taking a bite out of the slice. “hang on just a second.” clem said softly, using the tips of his fingers to wipe up the pineapple juice that had dripped from y/n’s lips.

“did you get it all?” she asked, patting at the skin around her lips.

“yeah, i think so.”

and in a move that shocked them both, y/n leaned forward, gently taking her lovers fingertips into her mouth and sucking up the remainder of the pineapple juice.

clem’s eyes widened, his muscles tensing as a small jolt of arousal went through his veins.

“i didn’t want anything to go to waste.” she blushed, voice sweet as she tried to avert her eyes.

“that’s bold for you, sweetheart. but I dont mind it, dirty girl.”

clem didn’t miss the way that y/n tensed, a touch of panic in her eyes as she took a step back from the countertop- and her lover.

“we talked about this, clement. remember what I said about what I needed to feel safe in the bedroom?”

and clem felt like shit. he hated that he was the person making y/n feel like this. he was the first to admit that sometimes he got carried away when it comes to sex. but it had been a learning curve since he and y/n had taken their relationship to that stage. she was sweet and gentle and jaded. she needed to feel loved all the time, and that carried over to the bedroom.

for y/n, sex was intimate and vulnerable. the act carried a lot of emotions, and it wasn’t something that she took lightly.

“I’m so sorry, love.” his voice wavered as he watched y/n’s shaky hands take the cap off of the pina colada syrup. “i got a bit carried away, but you know that I love you, y/n. you are the apple of my eye, the most important thing in my life. and I would never do anything to embarrass you or make you feel anything less than perfect, in or out of the bedroom.”

“i know.” y/n exhaled, the bad feeling slowly leaving her stomach. this was still her sweet lover boy clement. her hands were steadier now as she poured a small serving of malibu into the blender. “I’m probably overreacting anyways.”

“sweetheart, you overreact about a lot of things. but never this. I’m glad that you told me before I crossed the line too far and did something that really made you feel uncomfortable.”

“come over to this side and hold me while I make us a drink, you big dork.”

grateful that things were back to the way they were supposed to be, clement crossed the island to pull y/n into his arms, gently placing a kiss to her shoulder as she started the blender.

this was the clement that she loved. the clingy, sweet, affectionate version of the driver that only she got to see.

“grab a glass, I’ll get the straws.”

“coming right up, pretty girl.” clement quipped, placing a cocktail glass on the counter for y/n to pour the slush into.

she placed both reusable straws in the glass before turning around and offering her lover a sip. with a childish grin, the frenchman dropped a small pink drink umbrella in the glass, and they both giggled.

“I love you.” she said softly, before taking a sip of the drink.

after she swallowed, clem leaned over the glass to kiss her softly, cradling her cheek in his hand. “you taste like coconut.”

“you’re so cheesy.” she laughed. “you’re going to have to try it, too.”

ever the golden retriever, clem took his own sip of the drink before kissing his girlfriend, cradling her body close.

“god this is strong. how much syrup did you put in.”

“enough.” y/n laughed “you taste like it too.”

“we’re awful.” clem laughed, placing the glass on the counter before scooping his lover into his arms and carrying her over to the indoor/outdoor couch.

“i know. but only in the way that old married couples are.” she laughed softly, holding hands with her boyfriend as he kissed up her leg.

one kiss. four kisses. three kisses.

i love you.

there were plenty of amazing things that clement novalak could do in the bedroom, but those little kisses in that exact sequence was her favourite. it was clements way of reminding her how loved she was.

he gently slipped his hands underneath the seam of her swimsuit bottoms, waiting for her signal before slipping the baby pink fabric off her skin, folding the garment gently before placing it on the couch.

“I love you, clement novalak.” she hummed, gently carding her fingers through clems hair as she rested her thighs on his shoulders.

“I love you, y/n y/l/n.” clement grinned before kissing her thigh one last time before he gently ran his tongue over her slit.

“oh, sweet jesus, that feels good.”

she could feel clement smile, the gentle tickle of his stubble against her skin as he shook his head, making his girlfriend giggle. a giggle that soon tapered into a moan as clem kissed her core, gently sliding his tongue inside her.

“that’s it, sweet girl. I just want you to feel so so good, honey. I love making you feel good, darling.”

———

back outside, lissie mackintosh seemed to be the only one who noticed that the couple were missing.

“it shouldn’t take almost an hour to make a pina colada.” the influencer mused. she had previously filmed episodes of screaming meals with the boys and had fostered a close friendship with marcus in the time since.

marcus and james exchanged a look before they both burst out laughing.

“you really think they went to get drinks?” james laughed. “they have drastically different sex drives, but when you’re around them long enough you realize that when she wants him, she really wants him.”

“I just wish they’d not do it in the pool house.” marcus scowled. “they’d better clean up after themselves.”

“what did we miss?” y/n laughed, her face still pink and a hickey beginning to form on her thigh as she and clem rejoined the party, hand in hand an inseparable from each other as he passed her the pina colada glass.

“I love you.” clem whispered with a smile, kissing her neck as he hugged her from behind. “I’m gonna marry you someday.”

“after I finish college, that way james doesn’t get the payout from the bet.” y/n laughed, kissing him softly. “I love you too.”

Tags:

@mignonricciardo @scuderiamh @sidcrosbyspuck @magnummagnussen @clemswrld

#clement novalak #clement novalak x reader #formula 2 x reader #clement novalak smut #mini fic #formula 2 smut #screaming meals #Spotify

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yelling-space · 9 months

Text

sex hcs

// Might be a lil heavy 4 a first post idk??? thought it be a good indicator of what u can expect from me in relation 2 each charter encase that's sming u want 2 avoid tho,

so enjoy this short summary the Main 4s feelings on/relationship with sex and daans here 2 for some reason

none the left over colours fitted Enki so i made him pink 2 spite him

Cw :(Impyed) child prostitution + s/a

Cahara

-whore by birth,slut by choise

-has a hate-love relationship with sex(regardless position) and kinda treats it like a "get out of jail free" card, rellised from a young age the amount of horrble suitions he can get out of if he opens his mouth a lil wider and swings his hips a little

-can be pear pressured/guilted into agreeing 2 sex + for as mutch as hes into and enjoys sex he feels so gross and unclean and not comfy in his own skin after regadles who its with (he will internaly throw up and try 2 rip his skin of if you call him "exotic")

-will cry if he has totally normal fully consensual sane safe sex w a partner/ his wife

-doesnt understand the religious belifes of immodesty or sodomy esply when those higher up dont tend 2 practice what they preach , OPPOSITE of a prude , open whore.

D'arce

-closeted butch top that didnt realize her desire to fuck pretty men was actually her lesbian soul shining through

-lotta her,,,less practical ,vewis on sex stem from deep rooted homophba + was 2 goal oriented and determined 2 became a knight 2 even think about or consider it before espacping the dugon

-full heartedly believed all women harbour a disgust 4 the male sex organ and that coupes just did not have sex endless it was 2 convive a child , as you can imagine she was in for a surprise when discovering that was not the case.

-horrifically inexperienced and guided by her desire to dominate, and thus becomes known for owning The Scary Strap" that medieval men are afraid of

Enki

-Dead body fucker. That Necromancy spell is NOT going to just go too waist ,

-not all that interested in sex in general and never really saw any reason to engage with it when spell books are literally RIGHT there . saying that he most definitely gets of on having something completely under his control regardless what end the "fucked-fucking" scale he's on

- not really into sex with living people + how he's probably kind of inexperienced due to an isolated upbringing hence the want for control over puppeteering a sexual partner (dead body), or the high he gets off inflicting acts of sadism given how his ideas of intimacy have been twisted from childhood

-100%%%%%%% a fucking freek btw just cuz hes not 2 instered in sex dosnt mean hes not a fucking freek man fucks dead people and probs vry mutch into s/m

Rag

-wife kink. you don't understand how much he loves his wife.

-probs thinks sex is something shared between two lovers and is something meant 2 be full of affection and enjoyed by both party's

-probs see's s/a being viewed as something incredibly disrespectful, cowardly and the abuser deserve of death getting his shit kicked in (this is funny because i like 2 imagen rag starts projecting his dead wife onto cahara when he starts 2 lose it in the dungeon)

-did not know sex work existed or brothels were a thing, got jump scared by it when taking cahra back 2 see his wife with the others , he was vry confused and not rly sure where he was MENT 2 look so spent most the time with his eyes glued to the floor, celling or his friends faces (he respects women even if he's not rly sure what's going on)

Daan

-lil sex adictic freek , dosnt even realy enjoy sex that much,just so used 2 it being apart his life hes not entirely sure what 2 do without it,+allows himself to ast least feel incontrol the situion (for once in his life) cus he knows what the goal is and faster he gets it over with faster he'll be left to his own devices again.

-sex is all he rly knowns and grown up around, as well as one the only things hes ever seen actually be meaningful to anybody,regardless there relationships with there partner. but it feels like its something he owes people/doesnt really enjoy it regardless if he acrly wants it or not.

-dosnt proply understand how relationships work or that there's more 2 them then just sex (or that people could even *want* him for more then sex for that matter)

-sex was allways seen as something transactional or something for control - cant have any of that with fagcat, but can at least indulge in it in a way that makes him feel like he's way 2 finally has some small aspect control his life again.

-Honesty like ¾ his sex life is just him being abused by Pocketcat

#cw implied child abuse #fear and hunger #I hate all them btw #Cahara🤝Daan it's not rape if I don't say no but also don't say yes #cahara #enki #ragnvaldr #D'arce #daan #daan von dutch #Funger #fear and hunger termina #Pocketcat #stupid rambles

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cupid-tune · 1 year

Note

hey uhm could you tell us more about your fantrolls? they all look really cool but i dont know much more about them besides that. :P (also i like jhudas shes very pretty :])

OH ABSOLUTELY!! You have no idea how happy I am to get messages like this! This is gonna be a long post just because I want to get all of my guys in here, apologies in advance!

Not all of my trolls have fully fleshed out backstories yet, but the ones with dancestors are part of a fansession I'm in, they've had the most development by far.

Armane

Armane is probably my most neglected character, but I do really love his design and concept! He's a Burgundy with a lot of fight in him, despite his weak stature. He partakes in a lot of underground fighting rings in lowblood districts, usually to take out his anger or earn a little extra money. He's obviously gotten very hurt from it many times in the past, but that hasn't scared him away from a fight just yet. One of the reasons he gets violent so often is just the fact that he wants to prove himself to be tough and independent, since his lusus is very protective of him and has been ever since he was a wriggler. He's just a little problem child.

Armane is very afraid of death, but he hates mentioning or bringing up any of his fears. In general, he just isn't a very social or talkative troll, preferring actions over words and keeping his distance in any kind of gatherings. You could probably get him to warm up to you easy if you don't pose as a threat, but Armane follows the hemospectrum pretty strictly, and usually won't talk to mid bloods or higher on his own.

Nonemu

Nonemu is the leader of a cult called the Anon Trolls. I haven't done very much with their character in terms of backstory yet, since I really like them as a blank slate for whatever I could use them in. Her cult is meant to serve as an escape from society, living in a commune much more isolated from other trolls. To be apart of the family is to denounce your place in the hemospectrum and completely hide your color, as a way of being treated equally amongst everyone else in the commune. It's unknown what caste Nonemu is, but some say all the possible traits are hidden away, like their eye color for example.

Nonemu is a very kind and patient troll, serving as a sort of parental figure over his commune. He takes great responsibility and pride in his work, and can be quite a mystery to talk to. Nonemu is the type of person to speak in very vague terms, never really being fully truthful or transparent. It's up to interpretation whether or not they can be considered truly kind or malicious with their intentions.

Fennek

Ok Fennek is like. Think of troll Jesse Pinkman and that's what you got. My concepts for Fennek are in general pretty scattered, but his main gig is that he participates in a lot of illegal business as a supplier and seller. Having grown up on internet culture and self study, Fennek has taught himself all kinds of useful skills in advancing his unfortunate position to make the most of life. Chemicals and weapons are his specialty, but his skills and personality are nearly opposite.

Fennek is a very chill and easy-going kind of guy, never really taking any situations seriously. It's a wonder he hasn't died yet with the amount of life threatening risks he puts himself in. The mask really is the only precaution he takes when it comes to working with chemicals or other substances, his hair is probably full of toxic shit. It kind of gives off the idea that Fennek knows he won't live very long anyway, so he doesn't care either way. Live life to the fullest while you can.

Trinet

Admittedly, the dancestor designs are some of my favorites. The first concept for Trinet was that I just wanted a troll who was really into explosives, and oh boy is he into them. Similar to his dancestor, Trinet is an inventor who specializes in bombs. Explosives of any kind! He's very loud, probably due to the fact that his hearing isn't all there. It's probably a Snuzek tradition to just not be properly equipped for the shit you're trying to do, precautions aren't a concern whatsoever.

Trinet is VERY outgoing and active! He talks a lot and fast, you might not catch everything he says. Although his personality kind of gives off the idea that he's dumb or aloof, he's much more impressive when talking about the stuff he actually knows, like how to make this specific bomb or what that compound of elements can make! With how bright and joyful he seems, sometimes the things he talks about can be pretty dark or upsetting. There are lots of themes of death surrounding both Snuzeks, which I'll probably elaborate more on another post.

Zuzu

Zuzu is a whole fucking bundle of fun!! Ok the original concept was supposed to be a DJ troll, but somewhere through the designing process, they ended up turning into a Vocaloid. Centered around a lot of 2010 scene-type themes, Zuzu is an underground music artist and singer trying to make a name for herself. She'll take up any gigs available, hoping to be the party of the life and meet all kinds of trolls. Unfortunately, the music business is tough, and trying to get famous off of it is a lot more work than he initially thought.

Zuzu is the type of troll you'd go to for help or advice, a people pleaser with the full intention of trying to look good in the eyes of everyone. They can be pretty pushy at times, and they're not very good at reading the room. Although Zuzu means well, they fuck up social situations frequently, instead making him seem desperate or clingy. It seems like their emotions are amplified on all sides of the spectrum, one bad day can be a harsh blow for them.

Farrow

Although scary looking at first glance, Farrow is probably one of the most harmless trolls you'll meet. A simple farmer with a goal to live a just as simple life, Farrow is a recluse who lives on the outskirts of the city. They hardly ever interact with other trolls, not after an incident that caused them to lose their vision. A long time ago, Farrow worked as a bounty hunter, usually taking culling jobs as a means of getting trades for other goods. Now Farrow has taken up a more harmless line of work, disposing of the bodies from other troll's dirty work. They'll get rid of anything you might need to hide, using it for their own benefit such as fertilizer or food for their lusus.

In general, Farrow is very close to their lusus, using him as a guide around the farm and other places. Laying low is the next best option, but Farrow really doesn't mind. They are a welcoming troll with a habit of appearing much scarier than they mean to. Whether it be a creepy smile or misjudging you for an intruder, Farrow walks the line of good and bad. They don't really see their actions as immoral, simply understanding that their planet is a cruel place, and they really aren't the worst there is out there.

Fichte

Fichte was my first fan troll ever, originally used as a persona and turned into a dumbass philosopher. He is an absolute stuck up prick and will not apologize for any of his behavior. As cold cut as you can get with someone, Fichte is the type that will upright tell you his intentions and then get upset when you don't follow through with them like he wants. He'll study you, use you for research, and completely discard you after if you aren't of any use to him.

While seemingly emotionally distant, if you spend even a little time with him had he not pissed you off already, you might start to see signs of insecurity or loneliness. Fichte always favors logic over emotions, finding comfort in knowledge rather than the untameable pool of socialization. The subjects he studies varies, but his main interest is philosophy and studying the behavior of other trolls. One thing he especially loves doing is keeping notes of just about everyone he meets, and he has plenty of notebooks filled with just that.

Xarlow

Xarlow is just the guy you'd expect him to be, a silly clown guy with a horrible personality. He likes to consider himself popular and well known, running his own circus with his found siblings and performing to his heart's content. Xarlow specializes in the art of extreme performance, commiting acts of violence against others and himself. His tight corset is in fact one of the self proclaimed "art pieces" of his, using his body as a canvas and thereby destroying it. Speaking of, Xarlow had managed to lose one of his horns by accident during a public show, which ended in him tearing out the other to match. That was not a pretty show.

Xarlow doesn't seek sympathy. He isn't a good person outside of performing and he knows it. The general consensus of his personality is that he's bad, but there are so many personalities to choose from that it becomes confusing at times to pinpoint just one. He's manipulative and cruel, hypocritical at its worse. His history with Fichte is a great example of this cruelty, moirails turned kismesis to what eventually became too toxic to keep. They both hurt each other in their own ways, it's difficult to take sides. One thing is for certain is that their experience has had lasting effects, Xarlow isn't someone you should consider for a quadrant.

Onette

Onette is the definition of a gentle giant. What you see on the outside is entirely what's on the inside, a harmless troll who wants nothing more than to just create and enjoy life. A very soft spoken girl, Onette tries her best to appear harmless and approachable despite her size and caste, dressing in delicate clothing and using a gentle, warm voice to reassure others. Onette has a fascination with creation and art, one of her biggest hobbies being that of making dolls and paintings.

Onette has a certain distain for those in her own caste, often chastising them for their treatment of lowbloods, but doing nothing herself to stop them. She's soft, but perhaps too soft. Onette can be frightened easily, and is extremely nonconfrontational, something that she has a difficult time trying to come to terms with. Ironically, Onette has an interest in purplebloods especially, due to their popularity in being known as clowns. Many of her dolls are inspired by them, which can almost be seen as creepy or obsessive if you stepped into her hive.

Jhudas

Jhudas is very different from her dancestor, nearly opposite in nature. My biggest inspiration for her was the song Brutus, which can be seen in both her design and personality. She is a backstabber, often engaging in violence of all kind just to pave her way to the top. Unlike Onette, Jhudas has a clear hatred for the castes above her, purplebloods especially because she believes they rub their position in her face as being the caste right above. Jhudas deals with anger issues, and will likely explode on you with any minor inconvenience. She works as an assassin, usually taking up jobs from fellow highbloods even if she despises that fact.

Jhudas will be subservient to those she works for, but you can tell there are ulterior motives behind it. Waiting for the right moment to strike, to prove she is above everyone else in order to get what she wants. Despite all this, Jhudas may be one of your best allies, especially in quadrants. She's protective of those she deems worthy, and exerts a lot of tough love if she believes you can do better in handling yourself. It's just advised you should watch your back with her no matter what.

Veictr

Just from looks alone, you can tell what his deal is. Crazy scientist troll with the absolute worst intentions, gleefully using others in his nonsensical experiments all for the name of research. Veictr is just that! Everything about him should tell you that he's dangerous, and he very much is. Having stole the headlight of his dear lusus after a particularly nasty fight, Veictr began his work diving into the world of body modifications and mutation. He managed to find a way to hook the light to his own system, forming a symbiotic relationship with his body and the bacteria just as a symbol of award from his lusus.

Veictr is quite a confusing character in terms of personality, showing absolutely no sympathy for anyone while also being a sweetheart to those who manage to stay alive in his presence. He doesn't mean to intentionally hurt anyone, it just so happens that death and injury occurs when experiments fail. He's quite giggly too, with a hyperactive attitude and a great interest in others, Veictr can make for great conversation. His curiosity knows no bounds, and it really is a wonder how he manages to prove some of his theories correct.

Lucius

Lucius is probably the most unfortunate of my trolls. Having suffered the consequences of their own actions, Lucius managed to find herself trapped at the bottom of the ocean by a certain Fuchsia due to an obsession gone too far. Before this incident, she was considered a dangerous troll, perhaps just as much as her dancestor, but unfortunately, she was shut down far before she could get too bad. Although her entrapment was meant to be her execution, Lucius managed to survive with the help of her lusus, escaping after a sweep of just barely making it out.

Now, Lucius is an entirely different person. After so long of being in isolation, they've become paranoid and weak, suffering the many effects the ocean put them through. What was the most interesting part, however, was the fact that they returned with a strange mutation. It is unknown how exactly it happened, but Lucius now suffers with a bioluminescent stomach, her skin seeming thinner or perhaps even transparent.

Her story breaks off into many directions depending on the context, but one involves the scientific interest her own dancestor took of her after being discovered in this state. I'm currently in the progress of making an animatic based on this particular outcome which I'm very excited about! More lore stuff to be expanded on later.

This is the general information for each of my characters so far! There's a lot more detail I'd like to expand on in separate posts, especially considering I'm trying to cram a bunch into one. I really really appreciate the interest in my characters, and I hope to post more content about them soon! It makes me super happy that people enjoy them as much as I do.

This took a while to make LMAO

#homestuck #homestuck oc #fantroll #oh get ready for these tags #armane cedroc #fennek snuzek #trinet snuzek #zedroi telcho #farrow takshi #fichte nicolo #onette anikin #jhudas anikin #xarlow anowin #veictr loffei #lucius loffei #nonemu #long post

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aonungyoufuck · 2 years

Text

Runaway {Part 13}

Runaway Masterlist

DNI/BYF

Synopsis:Pain, Its all he's grown to know now.

How long had it been? Ao’nung was sure far too long. Now he didnt know what was happening. Your frame on the bed in this strange hut that Jakesuly had told him would keep you alive. He had always pictured the months of his mate’s pregnancy would be a gift. To hold you in the morning and spend time with you in the evening. Thinking up names and how one’s child would come of age. They would think of their first steps their first words.

And yet here he was watching as these wires and cords attached to you. Monitored you.

He had watched his mom fight tooth and nail to let her help. But there was nothing she could do to help. Na’vi weren’t ever meant to sleep for so long. Oftentimes he wondered if this was punishment for what they had done so many years ago.

“Jake we dont know how long she’s going to be like this”

“There’s nothing? Nothing at all we can do?”

“Our resources are running thin. All her vitals are good. She’s in good health her baby is in good health. You heard Mo’at and Ronal. There’s nothing they have done that can wake her. Neither can we”

He had learned to cope with this arguing. He hadn’t learned the demon language. It was kind of a mockery how they thought that they could speak in such a way like he wasn’t there. Like he wasn’t your mate.

Like he wasn’t suppose to know

He was constantly assured that you were okay. That things were okay. But if you were why hadn’t you woken up?

“Ma son. Please at least eat today’s portion i bring you” He heard his mother speak.

He didn’t know how she did but suddenly she was okay walking into the demon hut. She couldn’t understand it just like him. But she had watched how you were kept alive alongside your babe. So biting back her pride.

It had been at least two months and one week. And you were showing now. No doubt a full four months.

Ao’nung keeps a hold on you always when she comes. Perhaps that deep rooted fear is still in his heart. And it couldn't help but break her heart.

“Why hasn’t she woken?”

“I dont know. Eywa hasn’t answered us at all”

He sighed watching as your vitals stayed the same. He had learned to read it perfectly. But that was not enough. Looking at the food he was given before looking at his mother again.

“How is.. Everyone?”

“Living. It is all they can do. Worried about her”

He nodded. Oftentimes he would have visitors come and see you.

“So i hear Lo’ak has earned the title of Olo’eyktan”

Ronal lowered her head, nodding as she watched her son intently. All the life lessons. All the teaching to be the best hunter, the best everything and yet somehow. Someway Lo’ak had earned that well. Bringing the outcast home. Bringing his family together. Bringing the clan together in a time of sorrow as well as being the greatest Warrior alongside his brother.

Well it was no doubt given the circumstances that This was the way things were to be. Ao’nung had cared for his people. Tried to be that guiding leader, But what had that mattered when his heart ached to see and hold you.

This is the way things would have played if he didnt care either way. And a part of him felt bitter about it too. But he was fine. It would be alright

“When will the ceremony be?”

“What?”

“Mothing you know even if i go out there. MY heart is here. She lays here unwoken and never moving. I care about our people. I care about this place and i know that you dont like the idea. But, But Lo’ak’s shown to be a great leader.” He turned to look at you. Still unmoving.

“I trained to be everything this clan wanted of me. I did deserve the title. At a time and a place i was the greatest warrior here. But Tsireya chose him. And has taught him well. It is up to him if he decides to, He is wise, he’s grown. He’s Toruk Makto’s son and i have no doubt that he has earned it well. If he doesn't wish it. If Tsireya doesn't either. I’ll take up that role but not while she’s like this”

Ronal looked at him. That little ambitious boy no longer shower. And again biting back her pride for the sake of her family. She decided to allow such a request.

“As you see fit my son”

“I ask you one more thing”

“What is it”

“Please stay with her here. I… i want to do something”

And she nodded again. Now sitting by your side. As she watched him grow.

She held your hand in hers. Praying silently that you'd wake up soon.

Ao’nung had gone to the only place he knew to ask for answers. Knew where to see your warm face smiling at him. The spirit tree. Where he could live with the memory of you. Perhaps to ask for some answers for something to help you awaken.

Taking his queue in his hand before attaching it.

The warmth of the memory now embracing him. Opening his eyes he was now back in your little area you had lived for, for three years. You were there laughing and smiling at him. And he couldn’t help but rush to you and hug you.

“Ma Ao’nung whats the matter?”

“I just like feeling you”

He wanted to ask what to do. What could he do. Were you two being punished?

This was too real and in some sick way it was a cruel way to cope. But here you were smiling talking with him. He felt you laugh before taking your queue in your hand

“Ma Ao’nung you know if you ever need me to comfort you some more ill always be within your feeling if you allowed me so”

He looked at your tendrils in your hands. The pink things dancing and he had only ever asked to feel your breath with his after mating. But never again.

Watching you And he wondered if this was some sick joke on his heart. In his memories you shone brighter than the sun.

Your every waking moment was his own. And to never see your eyes staring back at him with the same love destroyed him.

Tears building in his eyes before finally letting this go. He had you so close and so yet so far. So close to touch you. To kiss you, to love you and yet. So far out of your thoughts.

Swimming back home he couldn’t help but think. Wonder why he didnt just ask. But you weren’t dead. Luckily enough you were just… there.

By waking moments it felt like he kept walking on shards of bones and hard rocks. And it felt as if all of the universe had stopped at once.

He felt hot and cold at the same time all over again. He hadn't fully recovered. Truth be told he was on the path of recovery and his mom made sure to keep him at his best health. But things were getting harder.

His feet dragged and it felt like his own bones began to break and grind together.

Turning to the hut he saw his mother. And with her worried face and her tone. He began to wonder. Was he really okay?

“Ao’nung?”

“Ao’nung!”

But he couldn't keep his eyes open. He couldn't hear her or respond to her. He just felt so cold and so lost without you.

When he came to you were by his side. Still beautiful and unfortunately still unconscious. Looking to his other side there his sister was. Her eyes tired and puffy no doubt from all the crying and for once he never felt so utterly useless.

He was the oldest, he was her protector aside his father and now Lo’ak. He never wanted or ever meant to see her so weak.

“Brother!”

“I am alright” He spoke hugging her. How long had it been, he thought. Too long. Far too long since the last time they had hugged.

“Are you though? You passed out suddenly and you don't look to well”

“I am, I promise it” He said no turning to look at your sleeping form. Calm at ease and yet so far from his reach.

She looked at him and then at you. So calm and gentle was he when he saw her. His every waking breath gave him his spirit to continue to go and she saw how much he loved you. And she finally understood what her parents meant to see someone love someone else so gently.

As was his life now attached to yours

“Tsireya im going to do something and you have to tell me if its stupid”

She looked at him seeing as he pulled at his queue and then grab yours. Her eyes widening and letting out a small gasp as she pieced it together.

“Ao’nung!”

“Please.. I need to hear her gentle melody. To feel her in some way than her stiff body. I want to learn to love her a little more in case anything happens to her. Please”

Pleading like a child. If this is what it feels to lose someone so close he never wanted to feel it again. Watching her eyes wither looking at him. She’s scared as is he. But he’s older he is suppose to never show his fear

“Alright” She bit down her fear looking at her brother now. “But please come back to us too”

“ I promise.”

It felt as time was stopping. Like if he did this there would be no going back. So he hoped that in some sick way he could hear and see and feel you once more.

And Tsireya watched as he joined you two again. Feeling him breathe again before falling down on her arms. Her hands caressed her brother’s face. How scared she was and praying. Oh praying hard again and again.

“Ma Eywa” she whispered. “ please help them”

====================

Taglist 34/34 : @simp-erformarvelwomen / @luvlykrispy / @yeosxxx / @fanboyluvr / @littlethingsinlife / @eirianna / @elegantkidfansoul / @tsukibaby1 / @adaiasafira / @1-800-not-simping / @reggiesslut / @cmfouatslota77 / @slutforsmut4ever / @zatarias-pandora / @valovesyou / @ashersplaceofwriting / @ghost-lantern / @victorianhorrors / @irlydontknoanymore / @hellok1ttycake / @sweetheartlizzie07 / @audigay / @kiyoloverose / @bogwaterswamp / @guska0 / @thatoneembarrasingmoment / @anxietydrogz /@eywas-heir / @joyfulfxckery / @b0rednb1tchy / @melonami / @totesnothere04 / @calums-betch / @alexizodd

#atwow #avatar the way of water #ao'nung #aonung x reader #ao'nung x reader #ao'nung x y/n #ao'nung x you #ao’nung x reader #atwow ao'nung

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blaqueswanzaghouliishiilikeda · 1 year

Text

mmm…

i wanna talk about paul. i dont think i lingered too much there. bc it’s a sensitive spot i guess? it’s a sensitive thing to be openly unwell. my focus with this post if i really even have that is his relation with louis. i wanna talk about paul in relation to how louis treats him and that being a reason why i love louis so much too. i love both characters. i think paul doesnt really ever get mentioned in fandom much. which is the psychosis experience tbh. so it tracks.

it’s a public spectacle every one wants so desperately to ignore and to be over. in my personal experience (and i don’t think i’m alone in this) the person going through it wants it to be over too. wants that people don't see them that way. but paul’s whole character is generally ignored other than in conversations about whether or not lestat caused his suicide, which was a compelling conversation. whether or not he did is a incredibly prickly thing in the gut of the story. and to be followed up with Louis staying with Armand after having killed claudia who has a thread with paul too. she has a manic/psychotic moment. she’s a collector. she’s a lot of things that society doesn’t want to see exist. (nor does the fandom but i digress) and the way she lives in this undead world is as if she doesnt exist at all so manny ways (like paul in life too in ways) we’ve spoken of if you are someone who dares to acknowledge the fullness of her character. i said this was about paul but im working through a connection in real time. i think that’s why i wanna talk about paul. bc he carries so much of the story in the little time he was alive. and his death is the catalyst for louis’ initial death. not the one lestat gave him, but the one that made it possible for lestat to convince him in the first place. ( the spiritual one maybe? idk. im just thinking thoughts)

what i never question in regards to paul and louis’ relationship, is that louis loves him. that’s what actually makes that: “did lestat kill him really? and whether or not he did kill him….louis thought he did and stayed?” conversation so insane in the membrane to me. because the way he treated paul shows me he does love him so much. one: something in him died with paul. another thing is that louis genuinely wanted him around. he advocated for him to stay out of the hospital. he took him out as soon as he was given the power to as head of household when his father died. (i have so many questions about his own feelings and opinions on his father.) he openly spent time with him. paul was his favorite person. he let paul crawl into bed with him. which is kind of big deal from what i know in the openly unwell population. not a lot of people want to comfort that. and louis allowing his male brother into bed with him for that tender moment is kind of a key moment for him to me bc of how the pressures of homophobia can affect how men are made to feel they can treat their male family members too. Louis sees him and his need and is willing to give it to him. louis wants to be there for his brother. he decides he’ll be the one to take care of him. tells grace not to worry about paul. he would take care of him. he assures paul he wont see lestat anymore. louis’ love for paul was in the way of lestat’s wants and desires. maybe paul did have suicidal ideation already. maybe many things can be true.

(i meant to post this during disability month, but i went through it and so now i’ll just continue where i left off)

louis struggling with killing a man with a daughter and wanting to go home to his brother…😵‍💫. paul isnt a child, but louis was his caretaker. in paul you see louis shine in that role (barring the bit where he pulls a knife out, and threatens to gut him, bc that was a performance. it’s not great but he didn't even want to do that). louis recognizing that locking away a man for having delusions just because he has them at all made paul worse was such a powerfully impactful thing to me. i say this fully well knowing sometimes going to the hospital can be beneficial these days, but even still being locked up there?? drugged and treated horribly given he was black and in a time when mentally ill people were treated heinously? louis saying he belongs at home and seeing to it that paul gets to be home with his family. spending time with him like he’s a person beyond his disability. beyond his delusions. that shit makes me like quiver and cry tbh. that’s mostly what people going through that need most of all and don’t receive. he loved paul. and when paul dies louis dies. idc. (so if lestat’s did take paul away from louis….he killed him twice….also while i’m here i have stirring thoughts about lestat knowing he could tell paul his truthful intentions in town and that out of paul’s mouth no one would believe him. maybe that’s the whole thought. or maybe i’ll come back to it. idk)

(i think in some ways claudia was also theyre to fill the casm paul created too. sorry none of this is like linear or anything im just thinking i guess. maybe i’ll make get into how i see they’re related later.)

#iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #paul de pointe du lac #lestat de lioncourt #claudia #my attempt at participating in this fandom again lol #sorry if i’m not like clear or if i’m all over the place

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tirasamu · 1 month

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Whomst from KNY made it to the list?

im so full of love for this show flamey :( i ran to shonen jump immediately and read the manga too !!!! under the cut bc manga spoilers !!

MY NO. 1 IS GIYUU 🤍🤍 my darling boy i knew he’d be the one as soon as i saw him and the further along i got the more i adored him, i just want to cradle him in my hands so gently. ive needed to love on him ever since the “im…not disliked by people” scene but then the story behind his haori just solidified it T^T his heart is SO big i want to spoil him w kisses. THESE PANELS my god !!!! im so happy he got at least somewhat of a happy ending :( he deserves the entire world and more

mitsuri !! i love when they let badass girls still be ultra girly !! the way she moved like a magical girl during fights !! besides her being the biggest cutie pie ever her and obanai absolutely destroyed me :< i wasnt ready to see them both die in each other’s arms like that. ive always been so weak for the ‘in another life’ trope but ive never thought of it in this kind of way where ur both dying and promising u’ll be together if ur given another chance. i feel like after everything else that panel was the one that finally broke my heart into a million pieces

douma because of course that little freak is here, i LOVE him !! i just wanted more of him :< i want to sit in his lap and kiss him all over and maybe clean up his eyebrows a little bit….another one in my long list of evil men who i like to imagine would only be soft for me :< i fear i would join his cult if given the opportunity but i like to think he’d say im too pretty to eat 🙂‍↕️ all that being said seeing shinobu get her revenge and kill him was so satisfying, i cant lie i was cheering !! i was giggling that even in purgatory he was still trying to flirt w somebody HFJDDJ he’s such a loser but thats my type !!!

and ofc i saved the best for last….muzan 🙂‍↕️ PHEW. u conditioned me from the start flamey i didnt stand a chance. he had no business being so fine and oh my gosh ?? the scene w daki ?? I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO STOP THINKING AB IT SINCE I SAW IT he had me blushing into my laptop (づ៸៸៸◟) i wanted to jump thru the screen !! i love how bitchy and grumpy he is always, i want to bother him w affection in the same way i want to bother fyodor hehe >:) also his little runway walk down to ubuyashiki was so funny

but his character was probably the most interesting to me…by the end i felt rlly bad for him, hes tragic in a way i didnt expect him to be (was ab to type ‘ykwim?’ but ofc mrs kibutsuji herself knows !! 🙂‍↕️) i know it could come across like he just wanted to be invincible but the thought of him being so sick as a human, then he becomes a demon and still cant live life normally just tugged at me. and then his last line being ‘dont leave me here’ ughh the desperation !! it hurts my heart T^T

reading / watching this series while grieving made it hit so much harder than i think it would’ve otherwise for me….it meant so much that after every death a past loved one greeted them to bring them to the other side, no matter how many times it happened i just wanted to bawl my eyes out (ㅠ﹏ㅠ) its def something im going to be thinking ab for a long time and going back to over and over again

#these four were the ones i adored but i rlly did love every character !!#except zenitsu. im his biggest hater #valentines

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ganondoodle · 2 years

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so, i have thought more about what we now know about botw2 and honestly, setting aside the smaller things i am not a fan of (like the building aspect) my biggest gripes about it are the plot looking like its gonna be very generic, especially regarding ganondorf, while i hoped it would perhaps finally give us a little more interesting take instead good vs evil; and the oh so mysterious figure you see in in the trailer very likely to be hylia, since shes mentioned constantly in the first game (among other things like her design being pretty much a carbon copy of zelda for the most boring reasons imaginable)

and no its not just bc of my stupid little fanworks (that i do bc i love the franchise, as much as i am critical of it, it comes from being very passionate about it, hence me working my fan lore around the canon so it doesnt disturb it much, its more meant to expand it on parts i think are a little lacking without me trying to sound superior, literally just as an act of love (and a little spite ill admit that) to add something to it)- BUT bc i have little hope they would do anything more than just going full blown "this monstrous beast is pure inherently evil, and this is the pure inherently good white little girl goddess whos just protecting her god given perfect and unshakable good tm monarchy" with no little to no nuance (theres also alot more to be critical of the general structure and implications like racism, orientalism, nationalism, that while i can see alot of wrong or questionable things in the games i lack the eloquence to talk about in its full range) yes i am personally biased bc i just .. hate that kind of story/worldbuilding structure, but i dont think im the only one who would think of it as boring and .. disappointing?

i dont need ganondorf to be redeemed, i dont need him to be the good himbo bf that some people think all ganondorf stans want, i just want him to be more than to shout "i will conquor this kingdom bc i am evil and want it" and send a horde of monsters after you, at the very least id want the game to just aknowledge that there must be a reason for it, why it turned out like this

the zelda series and its world has so much potential, which is probably a reason for its popularity in fanworks, but also keeps not using it, no i dont expect a company like nintendo to deliver on all my hopes, of course not, im not that delusional, but the further i think and learn about this universe and concepts they created i find myself asking "why" more and more where the games never elaborate, never question

i like a clear structure, i like when your choices dont have a big or any impact on the story bc i want to live the story, not worry about every decision like i already do every second of my life IRL, i want to partake in a movie, in a theater piece i can influence the pace of but not change the outcome, yet i feel kind of ... ignored? let down? asking why and how, how do they know this is right and this is wrong, how do they keep enacting this seeing it never works out, keep saying defeat this evil, but evil yet returns stronger than before over and over, how do they never ask "is this the right way?", they say "we need to kill it more next time"

i know they are fictional little characters made up to sell a game, with a convevient plot point to ever repeat the same structure, but it cant be wrong to say "i love this world, i want to see and know more, i want to see it grow and change, break the cycle and be better, show me characters not puppets"

theres very surely nuances and ideas i am sorely missing bc i lack the knowledge of japanese as a language, culture, and mythology, but i dont think it invalidates all that i feel for it ..

.. right?

#ganondoodles talks #botw2 #tloz totk #rambling #long post #just to comment on the building aspect again #i think i dislike it so much bc it feels like the zelda world might be heading towards a too modern one #i dont like how alot of series of all entertainment treat industrialization as inevitable #that every world will have cars and planes and phones the way we have #botw took some modern concepts and very elegantly remade them into something that fits and doesnt feel out of place #maybe im just boring #maybe i just dont like alot about the world we live in and it pains me to see the escapist relief of it be turned into a copy of it #maybe im just autistic and think too much about stuff that doesnt matter #lmao #or something

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asoiafsworld · 2 years

Text

THE TURNING POINT.

pairing; aemond targaryen x fem!reader

request; hello! can i order a one shot for aemond × reader? their marriage is arranged, and usually they see each other just to fulfill the duty of generating an heir, where the reader is only immobile, but as time goes by she starts to enjoy these meetings and aemond realizes this, and leaves his way to spend more time with her

warnings; mentions of arranged marriage, mentions of death, nsfw (18+), breeding kink, oral sex (f recieving)

author's note; my first ever request!! i dont think this turned out great but oh well. i hope you enjoy it, i love writing for aemond a lot even though i dont think im very good with his character be hes a little hard to write but i hope you guys like it either way <3 and pls send me requests if u have any!!

masterlist

⊱ ───────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ───────── ⊰

You wondered for how long you would have to live like this. Was it forever? Until you died? Because you were sure that death was better than this.

You always knew that your life had no great purpose, you were born as a woman in Westeros after all. The only purpose you would ever serve was by marrying a rich lord and giving him heirs upon heirs... and that was it, it was all you were ever meant to do and marrying a prince instead of a lord did not change anything about it.

Your father was a good friend of Otto Hightower, the Hand of the King and since you were one of the more important houses in the Seven Kingdoms, he agreed on your father's idea to have you marry Prince Aemond Targaryen, the second son of the King. You remembered your father constantly telling you how important this was and how crucial it was for you to be a good wife and let him do whatever he wanted with you... As if you were not human but a toy to play with and that's most certainly how you felt in this marriage with him.

You knew of his dangerous and ambitious reputation before, of how he lost his eye just to bond with the world's largest dragon and how he grew from a little boy to a handsome and clever man who was very talented with a sword too. You knew nothing of wether he was cruel or kind, wether he was violent or peaceful so marrying him was almost like a suprise to you... But you were not any wiser about him now than you were before you married him.

You had been married to him only two months ago, almost three but you already wondered if your idea before the wedding of fleeing to the Free Cities wasn't a bad one... because being chained to a bed for the rest of your life was an awful fate.

You closed your eyes as Aemond continued to thrust into you, hoping he would soon be finished. You met him twice every week in your chambers, always for the reason of having to produce an heir and the fact that he only came for this, never acknowledging you or showing some sort of kindness towards you was humiliating. As if you were a whore who only did as she was told.

Maybe if he was kinder to you or just simply spoke to you, you would have admitted that you liked it a little...

The way he was gentle with you and seemed to care about wether or not you were in pain, the way he made you cum at least once with his tongue and fingers before he entered you and adjusted his pace to you.

But you had the hardest time supressing your moans when he came in you, filling you with his seed and making you feel so full as if you would burst. You were ashamed of how much you liked it and how nice it felt and how you hoped that it would take and make you pregnant because then he had no excuse to fuck you anymore and you wouldn't have to worry about your perverted thoughts.

Before you could think any further about it, you felt him come inside you with a final grunt. You layed there, not having moved an inch the whole time that he had his way with you and let him moan lowly right next to you, his cum shooting into you so deeply that you couldn't resist but clench around him... It wasn't even really you who did that, it was as if your body acted on it's own, wanting to show him that you liked it.

He let out another moan at the way you clenched around him and you could tell that he was looking at you but your head was turned to the other side. You felt him thrust once more, something he never did before and you could feel how he was pushing his own cum deeper into you and you reacted to it without really wanting to, clenching even harder around him and visibly shaking from the feeling. You had to swallow a lump in your throat to supress your moans but you were sure that your husband knew that you wanted to.

He kept watching you from the side but said nothing, his ever so attentive eye trained on you. You wondered how much he really knew about you, how much he even cared to know about you since he didn't seem to be very interested in his wife...

How soon that would change.

⊱ ───────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ───────── ⊰

Two days later you were in the gardens and cross-stitching with your sister in law, Helaena. She was a curious thing, always talking about things you don't understand but she was also a very sweet person, loving the prospect of having a sister that she would get along with and it made you feel better as well, to have someone in the family who is at least a friend to you.

You smiled at the stitching that Helaena had done, a red spider, as you heard footsteps come towards you.

You looked up from the stitching to see your husband come towards both of you and were suprised at the sight of him willingly approaching you outside of you bedchambers.

"Hello, brother! I thought you were training, what brings you here?" Helaena smiled widely at him, clearly enjoying seeing him and you saw the small smile that formed on Aemond's face, just for a few seconds.

"I was training but I decided to show some mercy to Ser Criston and ended early. Would you care for me to steal my wife away, dear sister? I wanted to walk the gardens with her."

You had talked to Helena about her brother's relationship with you recently so both of you were quite shocked to hear these words from him. You studied his face, the way his chin was pointed and his jawline that was sharp as ever, his blue eye studying you as if you were baring your soul for him.

You got up and excused yourself for Helena who was smiling brightly at you, hoping that this would mean that Aemond would finally spend some actual time with you. You began walking away from the table that you sat under, the sun beaming down at you and the flowers looking as beautiful as ever. You walked a few steps before Aemond spoke up.

"I wanted to apologize for how I acted towards you... I think that I can count on both of my hands how many times we spoke after our wedding which was some moons ago now. I realized the other day that I had not been treating you fairly and that you most likely never wanted this match and that it was very kind of you to still let us be together for the sake of having an heir. Truthfully, I was not ready for marriage and I still don't believe I am but I should at least try, for your sake and for both of our sakes since we will be with each other for a long time."

You were even more shocked at the words coming out of his mouth... Was he being genuine? Was it some kind of trick he was playing on you? His eye only seemed to tell you the truth and you sighed deeply.

"I... I don't know what to say but I'm glad to finally talk to you properly. I accept your apology and hope that you know that I don't think ill of you just because I didn't necessarily wish for this. I didn't, it's true but now, I think that others might have it a little harder in their lives. I want to know who you are, I want to learn about your personality but as long as you decide to shut me out or ignore me, I can't."

It dawned on him that you had figured out why he was staying away and you could tell that he was thinking precisely on what to say next. It was easy to see that he barely talked to anyone about his insecurities and problems and that he didn't want to get too close to anyone and you understood it but did not encourage it.

"Yes, you're right... I am always reluctant to be vulnerable with someone so I thought ignoring you was the right course of action which it clearly wasn't. I'm sorry that I have hurt your feelings... I wish to make up for my actions by spending my time with you now."

You smiled at him at that, pleased to finally hear the words you wanted to hear and he showed you a small smile, so beautiful on his pretty face.

Maybe something could come of this marriage after all.

⊱ ───────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ───────── ⊰

Throughout the past few weeks you had been spending much more time with Aemond, learning about him and what made him so unique and it was safe to say that you had fallen in love with him, just a little.

He made you laugh and smile with his words and jokes, made you meet Vhagar and even took you on dragonrides with her. He finally showed genuine interest in you and your heart bloomed at that, so happy for the attention you were receiving. You learned of how kind he actually was to you, his hidden but sweet demeanor showing with the gifts and compliments he was giving you.

In the weeks you had spent as actual husband and wife, you had not lain with him since he said he wanted to spend time learning about you first. You had requested that you would do it again tonight, intending to show him just how much you liked the things he did to you.

He was even gentler with you than before, stripping you of your dress and leaving soft kisses all over your face and lips. He held you like you were the most precious thing in the world and you basked in the love and affection he showed towards you.

He was as calm and precise as ever when he put his face between your legs again, eating your cunt with a hunger he didn't have before. You moaned loudly at this, burying your hands in his hair and grinding your hips up to hold your cunt against his face. You promised him that you would show just how much liked him and the way he pleasured you.

He had you coming in no time and when he deemed you open enough and entered you with his cock, it felt like you were actually laying with him for the first time. You both moaned loudly, feeling peaceful and content with each other now and Aemond wasted no time pounding into you as if he was a feral animal. You were overwhelmed by his pace and couldn't hold back your moans this time, calling for his name and begging for him as if he was your God.

And when he finally finished inside of you, you whimpered helplessy and felt embarrassed at how much your enjoyment at it showed. It felt like he was claiming you, putting his seed deep into you and hoping you would be pregnant soon enough.

He couldn't wait to fuck you with a swollen belly, full of his cum and pregnant by his seed.

#house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen imagine #aemond targaryen smut

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aita-blorbos · 5 months

Note

ATIA for not wanting to all be alone again?

tw for possessive behavior, basically kidnapping, and unhealthy relationship

(full of a ton of fanon)

So i, (i dont think i have an age, f I guess) live on this planet. it is very lonely. it is uninhabited by people and i accidentally got rid of all the wild life where i live. watching things the only thing i can do to pass the time.

then this guy C (dont know, m) crashed on the planet. i watched him gather up the parts to his ship. i didnt expect him to survive but he got all the parts and left the planet. it made me very jealous. how come he gets to go home while im stuck here.

but then weirdly enough he came back. he brought another one of his species but that one doesnt matter. i didnt understand why he came back. he got alot of there various objects. and then he left again. i liked watching him get the stuff.

and then he came back a third time. he got more stuff too.

i started to think. maybe the reason he kept coming back was because he wanted to see me. it made sense.

eventually he approached where i live. he approached me and that made me very excited. that proved my theory that he was looking for me!

he fell asleep not to long after actually seeing me thought so I set up a nice place for him to rest. i made sure to stay close so he wouldnt worry about me. i cuddled with him. it felt nice.

when he woke up he kept cuddling with me. after i left for a bit he went to walk around where i live. I let him do this for a bit. when i went to bring him back he fell asleep again.

it continued like this for a while. it was wonderful. i wasnt lonely anymore! he meant everything to me! nothing mattered more than C! C made existing mean something to me again!

but because everything good that ever happens to me must get destroyed C got taken away from me. these three...things grabbed him and stole him away while he was sleeping. I fought desperately to keep them from taking him but in the end i failed and they took of with him.

it has been horrible ever since. i miss him more that almost anything. i can only imagine how C feels. he must miss me a lot too im sure of it.

am i in the wrong for not wanting to be alone again? is that too much for me to ask? am i... selfish?

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality #kidnapping

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inlovewhithafairytale · 1 year

Text

I think we lost her part 2

I'll be good

Theo reaken x reader

never meant to start a fire I never meant to make you bleed I'll be a better man today

I'll be good, I'll be good And I'll love the world, like I should Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good For all of the times that I never could

My past has tasted bitter for years now So I wield an iron fist Grace is just weakness Or so I've been told I've been cold, I've been merciless

But the blood on my hands scares me to death Maybe I'm waking up today

Yn slammed the door of the truck and started walking toward the MCcall household yawning. She walked toward the door and furrowed her eyebrows when she heard some yelling from the inside and someone angrily walking toward the door.

Malia appeared with her face into a decuided frown and stalked past her berely giving yn a hello.

"Well hello to you too bestie" yn muttured and walked into the house closing the door shut behind her. Scott inmidiatly appeared and his eyes widened in shock when he saw her.

"Yn.. uh what are you doing here?!"

"I told her to come" liam answered scott before yn had the chance to. Scott looked as if he would kill is own beta and liam lifted his hands up in defense "Idont think is fair that we lied to her and shes one of my best friends! She was literally going to kill herself!"

Yn raised an eyebrow at the alpha and the beta wondering what had gotten into them"you guys" they both turned around to face her "I am very confundida, and why does this even have to do with me?"

Scott started to say something to probably send her home when Yn heard a voice she though she'd never hear in her lifetime, a voice she could only hear in dreams.

"Yn?"

She rushed between liam and scott and into the kitchen and saw theo pushing himself to stand, blood falling from his nose.

His eyes widened when they met hers and yn drew in a sharp breath looking around, but scott liam and hayden were all looking between the both of them.

"Your'e here?"she whispered

"Hey baby" he answered giving her a small smile eyes full of tears.

Yn gave a breathy laugh and ran toward him wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his torso.

Theo held her tightly against him chuckling "oh god youre here, youre here, youre not dead"yn repeated aginst his neck as she held tightly onto him.

"Im here princess. And i dont plan on living any time soon" theo murmured aginst her hair and then kissed her cheek. Yn let go and theo set her down on the floor putting a hand aginst her cheek. Both their eyes were full of tears as they both chuckled happily. Then theo bent down and kissed her, putting both his hands against her face, lips fitting perfectly together moving in slow motion.

Yn pulled away after a moment and looked up to him smiling "I thought you were dead"

"Well not exactly "

"But scott said-" yns words hitched and she whipped around to face Scott. "You lied to me?" She demanded.

Scott blinked and nodded"yes, because i knew-"

"Where on earth has he been this past 3 months?"

"On hell with his sister" scott answered

Yn pursed her lips in a tight line and shook her head "how could you?! Scott ive trusted you with my life and you just couldnt keep the only person ive ever loved safe?"

"Yn hes KILLED people, he killed his own sister, he killed ME, he hurt your dad-"

I though you were the true alpha"yn snapped"i though you were the one with the heart of gold, the one who belived in second chances! The one who actually cared!" Yn swallowed down the tears that were threatening to fall" I gess i was wrong"

"I did what I had to do to protect the pack" scott said defended himself.

"Dont you think I know!" Yn screamed her eyes flashing their signature violet " I would do anything for the pack, to keep everyone safe, Im the one who tries to keeps everybody safe. But when it comes down to it YOU couldent keep the Only person I've ever loved safe, ive never asked for anything scott. Not once. Why on earth did you lie to me?"

Scott couldent find the right words he knew yn was angry, and he also knew she would do anything to protect the people she loved "I knew you'd raise hell if necessary to bring him back" he answered

"Yes I would!scott i tried to kill myself because i felt a gaping whole on my chest. I had constant nightmares and you saw me go through all that because you tried to keep the pack safe?because yo knew ill bring him back?!" Yn squintedher eyes dangerously "i genuinely despise you scott MCcall"

"Yn listen im sorry-" scott said trying to apologize

"You could have said that around 3 months ago dont you think?"

Yn turned reached for theo's hand who had been staying silent through all the conversation as well as the others. He took her hand and let himself be gided toward the door.

"Were are you going?" asked scott blocking their way

"Im living and theo is coming with me, try to stop me and I WILL raise hell" yn threatened

Scott moved out of the way and tried to look at his betas for help but hayden only shrugged "shes right" and liam went to follown them, katana in hand.

"Yn!" Liam called before they could exit the house

Yn turned around to face him and liam extended the katana for her to take"you would problay want this" he tould her

Yn gave him a small smile as she reached for the katana" thanks liam"

Liam nodded and looked at theo who gave him a silent thanks by giving him a nod wich he returned.

When they exited the house and theo saw his truck he gave her a small smile " you kept it"

Yn shrigged and gave him a tighed liped smile"its yours, it just felt like the only thing i had left from you." She reached the keys out to him " you drive"

"Nah give me a few days to adjust on being back"

Yn gave him a small nod "ok" she walaked toward the deivers side as theo got into the passangers.

Yn turned on the ignition, and once theo was in started driving home.

"Why did liam let you out?"

"He thought i still had Josh's power" he kept his gaze on the road " but I didnt"

"You dont have it anymore?"

"No, Joshs or tracy's im back to good old me" he answered giving her a sad little smile

"Thats great, I like old you" she spared a glance at him with a smile" its actually my favorite you"

Theo laughed and took her hand giving it a smalla squeez. Then as if he caughed a smell of something he opened small compartment between the seats.

"Uh dodnt open that" yn said trying to stop him but he just gave her a puzzled loom and pulled out a bottle of vodka half empty

"Or do..." yn said pursing her lips on a tight line and kepping her eyes fixed on the road.

Theo looked from the bottle to her eyebrows raised "didnt know you drinked"

" I didnt."

"Does this have to maybe do with the fact that you said earlier you almost killed youself" he asked her quietly. Knowing he was walking on thin ice." Uh.. yeah" she answered her eyes till fixed in the road

"What happened?" His voice full of concern

Yn took a minute to answer "You were gone. You were Dead. And i just wanted to forget everything. Everybody was sympathetic but i knew they didnt even mean it. Everybody hated you" yn looked at theo who nodded at her to continue "so i took the bottke my dad kept hidden and downed it. I felt awful the next day. And thats an understatement, but just for a minute you know. I felt fine. I didnt feel anything anymore. So I took your truck and started driving every night to the look at point and sometimes malia found me there. Completely wasted. And thats how it went for 2 months. I went to school, locke myself in my room and do homework. Hit the shit out of my punch bag. And then drive to the look out point. Till one day i got in a fight with stiles and i decided that i didnt want to live anymore. So i downed a bottle of sleeping pills with vodka"

Theo drew in a sharp breath as he heard how much he actually meant to yn. How much she loved him, and it startled him. Be ause he thought he wasent meant to be loved.

"Dad found me in my room half an hour later and rushed me to the hospital were i spent 1 week in a bed"yn continued "it was awful. Dad made me promise him id never do it again. I actualky felt bad for everyone. They were all so worried. Stiles didnt live me out of hes sight till. Well you know.. got taken."

Once she parked the car in the driveway she spared a glace at theo.

He had tears in his eyes as he looked at her. Her hand securedly in his.

" Im so sorry" he whispered

"No oh god no theo" yns hand quickly went to his face " baby its not your fault, i shoulent have told you now"

"No, im glad you told me" he said swallowing down his tears " do you really love me that much?"

"To the point were i would kill myself to be with you, YeS" yn aswered lokking into his eyes " yes theo I love you, and i would do anything for you. dont. You. Ever. Doubt That.:

"I love you too yn. I love you so much" theo said gently squeezing the hand he held in his." Don't doubt that'

"Trust me. I don't " yn answered with a breathy laugh.

Theo rolled his eyes at her and then gave her a peck in the lips." So what do you plan on doing with this" he asked taking the bottle and lifting it

"Just live it in the car,dad would kill me if he knew I had that"

"Right" then he bent down and slided the bottle under his seat"there you go"

Yn chuckled and opened the door climing out of the car "so dads at work wich means we wont have to undergo akward questioning" she informed theo as they walked toward the doorway. Yn opened it and stepped in theo behind her. "Are you hungry? There's pasta. I can heat it up real quick"

"Uh no thanks, liam bought take out" theo answered smiling down at her.

"Kay" yn grinned back at him and took his hand leading him toward her room.

"Take a bath. You kind of smell" she said as they walked in, scruching her face into a smile

"Geez so hard" answered theo in mock pain. Yn just laughed and walked toward her drawer. Bent down and opened the botton one and pulled out one of theos shirt and pants.

"Here you go" she said straightening up and handing the clothes to him.

"I dont want to know?"

"There are clean towels in the bathroom "yn said ignoring him.

"Thanks mom" he jocked and kissed her cheek as he walked past her.

Yn stood there for a moment till she heard the water running with a big smile on her face.

He was back. Theo was finally back and alive. And soon they would get everyone the ghostriders took and everything would be alright.

Then she took off the taktop she had and her bra and pulled on an oversized shirt. And since she already had her pajama pant on climed to bed. Resting her back against the pillows.

She bent forward and retrieved a book next to her bedside. She was resting back comfortably when a notification rang on her phone. She 5ook it from the night table and ooened it to see it was Liam.

"Hey baby, liam asks where do we need 5o meet to get to the power thing"yn called

"Oh you mean the generator? Tell him its in the reserve" he answere from the bathroom.

"Okay...... uh, he asks 10 or 11 am, 11 right?

"Yeah" theo opened the door pulling on his shirt

Liam

Ok then

Wear protection ;)

Liam. NO

Yn turned off the phone chuckling at tye antics of the teenage werewolf

Theo sat down in the bed next ro her his back against the headboard.

"You look cute with your hair all wet" yn commented smiling up at him.

"Hmm"hummed theo nodding giving her a small smile"what are you reading?"

"The hunger games" yn answered lifting the book up.

"I saw the movie but never read the book"

"Youre welcome to read them anytime. This is actually the second book but the firt one has to be somewhere in my bookshelf."

"Ill take you up that offer" he muttered.

youtube

Then he gently slapped his tights gesturing her to come over" come here" he told her, more like a question that something else.

Yn smiled and sat on his lap. Her legs to one side and her head below the crook of his neck. She took one of his hands in hers and started playing with his fingers, while he ran his fingers through her hair with his other one. He pressed a kiss on the top of her head breathing her in, finally feeling as if he was finally home whit her in his arms.

"I never meant for you to get hurt" he whispered closing his eyes

" what do you mean?"yn softly asked him running her thumb softly on the top of his hand.

"I never meant it to be like this love, i never meant for you to get hurt. Ill be better yn. Ill be good" he muttered resting his chin on top of her head. yn could hear him sniffle as a tear rolled down his cheek "ill be good. I will try to be better. I will try to make things right. I shouldent have done what I did. I shouldent have hurt them. I shouldn't have been what ive been all this years. Ive been so cold. So heartless. So mercyless" he choked out tears falling. Yn held his hand betwee both of hers tightly. Letting him pour his feelings out." but yn. It scares me. All the blood in my hands terrifies me. And maybe. Maybe im waking up. Today. Ill be good. Ill be good" he sobbed. yn lifted her head ane put her arms around his neck letting him cry into her neck " I'll love the world like I should. I promise ill be good, for everyone I've ever hurt. For everything good ive ever doubted. For all the pain ive brought to you. For everything ive done all this years. For all those hipes and dreams ive killed. And for ever doubting you" he sobbed. Yn held him close as a few of her tears fell into his shirt. "Ill be good, I"ll be good" he repeated again

"I know you will theo" yn whispered " and promise ill be here. I promise I will always be here"

Theo snuggled his face into the crook of her neck and rounded his arms around her waist holding her close.

They sat there, holding each other. Till in the end yns eyelids closed without her consent, and she dozed off.

Theo felt her breath deepened and knew she had fallen asleep. He cautiously, trying not to wake her, rearranged the pillows. He leaned over and turned off the lights, and layed her in the mattress, tyen he laid down his front pressed to her back and rounded one of his arms around her waist.

"Mhh?" Yn hummed sleeply"sorry i just didnt sleep last night" she apologized sleeply

"Hey, its all right" theo cooed and yn turned around rounding one arm around his torso, snuggling closer and buring her face into his chest.

And there. They finally felt happy, like some part off them had finally returned. They felt like home

Ill edit this when I can but here it is!!

#teen wolf #fluff theo reaken #theo raekan x reader #teen wolf x y/n #teen wolf x reader #scott mccall #stiles sister #i love her

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