#i dont have a playlist for this n i probs never will idk

[otasnox]

forgot theres like one good otaliquid fic on ao3 like. here i will categorize them all for u

[80pairsofcrocs]

baby scarab || 29

anon - reader giving steven little pats? he deserves them 😌💕 doing late night legos with him? LETTING HIM HOLD ONE OF THE PLUSHIES WHILE THEY TAKE A NAP TOGETHER?? 😩😩😩

~~~

anon - Hey!! By any chance do you think you could have the boys comforting reader with a stomach migrane(basically really bad stomach pain that nothing really helps it and often can throw up wether from pain or just nausea) I have one and its prob gonna last a few days lol T-T

Feel free to deny or ignore this, no pressure what do ever!! :D

~~~

anon - Love your baby scarab series!! Idk if Y/N gets sick anymore bc of the spider bite but it would be fun to imagine the boys freaking out when Y/N has a fever and is delirious lol

~~~

A/N : funky time

masterlist - marvel masterlist - series masterlist

A/N : busy busy chapter. never be afraid to leave requests!! and dont worry if you dont see yours for a while, if i havent answered it, that means im working on it.

please enjoy, and don't be shy if you want to be in the taglist, just ask <3, sorry for the long wait

playlist

pairings : steven grant x (platonic)reader, marc spector x (platonic) reader, khonshu x (platonic)reader, jake lockley x (platonic)reader

TW : medicine (pills), language, spidey stuff, sickness, mentions of violence. let me know if i missed anything

~~~

you and steven were cleaning up from dinner, you and the guys haven’t talked more about why you distanced yourself for a couple days.

and like everyone has said, they understood.

you were drying the dishes while steven washed them.

“so what’s in the bag?” marc asks you, and you turn to face him in the window.

“just something i picked up” you respond, feeling embarrassed all of a sudden.

“it’s dumb so don’t worry about it” you say quickly and set a now dry plate down to reach over to the next one.

“i’m sure it’s not” marc starts. “but you don’t have to show us if you don’t want to” he finishes and you smile to yourself.

it’s quiet for about a minute until jake speaks up. “so are you dating ese niño?” he asks and you cringe.

“no- maybe- i don’t know” you stutter, and jake chuckles.

“but you want to” 

you don’t say anything, while you angrily dry the dishes.

“stop making that face, he’s just being a dick” marc tells you and you chuckle.

“still a hypocrite” you respond, earning a scoff from marc.

~~~

after finishing the dishes, you and steven were on the couch watching your favorite show while he asked you what was happening every five seconds.

it amazed you how dumb he could be sometimes. 

only with non boomer things though, he was really smart otherwise.

you all had been so engaged in just watching tv, that you didn’t even notice khonshu perched on the top of the couch also watching.

you suddenly felt light headed, and sat up completely compared to being leaned up against steven, him looking to you in worry.

“you alright?” he asks, marc and jake suddenly focusing on you too.

“yeah.. i just feel weird all of a sudden” you say, and you take a few deep breaths before getting the chills.

you shiver and steven sits up properly so that he could try and figure out what was wrong.

“my head feels weird” you mutter, steven getting up to get you some medicine.

“i’ll be right back” he tells you right before he leaves.

you just feel out of place right now, for some reason.

like your body is trying to decide wether you’re sick or not.

you feel kind of sick, but not sick at all at the same time, frankly it was confusing.

steven came back with medicine and a thermometer, while you just stared at him with squinted eyes.

“why’s it so bright in here?“ you ask him, your own voice sounding loud in your ears.

“it’s.. not?” he starts, handing you the thermometer.

“under your tongue” he reminds you and you stick it in your mouth, under your tongue like steven told you.

you both waited for a couple minutes before you got bored and yanked it out of your mouth, seeing your temperature to be 104.7.

“oh shit i’m dead” you go completely limp, falling onto steven.

“wait wait wait- what?” he asks confused, taking the thermometer from you and panicking once he saw it.

“holy mother of god, are you okay?” he feels your head, it being way hotter than usual.

“fuck” he mutters and you gasp dramatically, sitting back up.

“steven said a no no word” you look to marc and jake who were eyeing you weirdly.

“guys- did you hear it?” you ask both of them and they nod with small smiles.

“yeah.. we heard it” marc mumbles and you start laughing.

“what just happened? did she take drugs?” steven asks, looking at your eyes for any sign of drug use.

“no, we would’ve noticed sooner” jake says.

“maybe it’s the spider bite” khonshu pipes up, making everyone look to him.

“it would make sense that it would protect her from sickness” he starts. “but she would still feel tired” he elaborates and steven nods.

“that makes sense, yeah?” he asks jake and marc, who both shrug.

you were still sitting up, squinting at the ceiling. “do you think khonshu has ever pecked somebody’s eyes out?” you ask steven, turning to face him.

“like in the birds?” you clarify and he looks at khonshu who was nodding.

“no- no he hasn’t” he shakes his head.

khonshu bangs his stick on the ground out of anger while you reach your hand out for the medicine steven brought you.

he opens the bottle and puts two pills in your hand, and shoves a bottle of water into your lap.

you scoff and open the water, sticking the pills in your mouth and swallowing them.

“i feel like i got hit by a car again” you mutter, steven looking to you in a panic.

“wait- again?!” he asks, and you nod, lifting up your shirt do that you could show him where the bruises were- since they were already healed.

“i got hit righttttt, here” you point to your ribs and put your shirt back down, ignoring the look that marc was giving you.

“and when was this?” marc says in his interrogator voice.

“ay ay ay..” jake shakes his head.

“it was when i stopped the robbers” you tell him excitedly.

“they reversed their car and then i got hit. nobody got it on camera though” you sigh disappointedly.

“good thing they didn’t otherwise you guys would’ve found out” you sigh.

the three of them just stare at you like you’re crazy.

“okay- but how did you not get some kind of infection?” marc asks and you hum in thought.

“my guy in the chair” you answer, earning a groan from marc.

“and who is your guy in the chair?”

“casper”

“of fucking course it’s casper” 

“hey- everybody just chill the ‘f’ out” steven starts. “she’s fine now, just clearly not right in the head at the moment”

“i’m never right in the head” you glare at the floor.

“yes you are” steven says quickly and you smile to yourself.

“it’s almost just like she was when she was sick last time, we can handle it” steven says.

“but this time we have to make sure that khonshu doesn’t tell her she’s going to lay eggs” marc scoffs.

“yeah, she woke up later that night crying because she was seriously convinced she was going to lay eggs” steven replies, marc nodding along.

“i’m not fucking stupid, i know i don’t lay eggs” you speak up, and steven gives you a look.

“watch your language” steven murmurs, but you still hear it.

you just smile innocently at him and take a breath.

“shh” you shush him, and he scoffs. “you’re so loud” you cover your ears.

“do you think her abilities are acting up?” steven asks marc and jake.

“probably” “si” they both answer at the same time.

“y/n, darling” steven starts. “how can i help you?” he says in a quiet voice, as to not hurt you further.

you still heard him perfectly even though your hands are covering your ears.

“do i still have pop tarts here?” you ask and steven nods.

“can you please get some?” you ask again an get another nod.

steven gets up to get you pop tarts while your hearing calms down, not expecting what was next.

you sniff and smell marshmallows as steven gets back.

“thank you- and do you happen to have marshmallows here?” you question and steven shakes his head.

“i can smell marshmallows” you clarify, and marc makes a face.

“what? but we don’t even have any marshmallows here” he tells you and you shake your head.

“i know but they’re coming from-“ you look to khonshu.

“i knew you ate them” you tell the tall bird, and he shrugs.

“no i didn’t” he denies it and you wave him off.

“dude you literally smell like them” you start. “and that’s a compliment because you usually smell like a corpse” you chuckle to yourself while marc laughs at the insult.

“shut it, tiny spector” he grits out at you and you just laugh harder.

“yo, i can smell sand too” you notice and you see all three of the guys giving you weird looks.

“you can actually smell sand?” marc asks and you nod.

“there’s probably still some under the worms bed” jake suggests and steven scoffs.

you sit there for a minute while your sense of smell goes back down to its new normal, wonders which sense would be heightened next.

you rip open your bag of pop tarts, almost sending them flying across the room.

“god damnit” you mutter, steven chuckling at you.

“i will hit you” you threaten, angrily eating the pop tart.

“ooh so scary” marc says from the mirror on the coffee table.

you glare at him and flip him off before rolling your eyes.

“what would you like for supper tonight?” steven changes the subject.

you think about it for a second while chewing on your pop tart.

“‘m not hungry” you say, while taking another bite of your snack.

“you are literally eating a pop tart right now” marc points out and you shake your head.

“but after that im not hungry” you say.

“well, dinner is in a few hours so what do you want” jake cuts in and you hum in thought again.

“i know what she wants” jake says with a small smirk.

you look at him curiously as marc gives him a warning look.

“she wants casper, isn’t it obvious?” he chuckles and you gasp dramatically.

“why are you like this?” you ask, and jake snickers at you. 

“you’re too easy”

“am not”

“are too”

“no-“

“you both need to shut up” marc says, and you glare and jake, to which he glares right back.

you just huff and look away from everyone, closing your eyes while you chew on your pop tart.

“why do you think nobody adopted me?” you ask suddenly, surprising even yourself with the sudden question.

“i mean i was in foster homes almost all my life, so how come nobody wanted me?” you expand the question.

“maybe they knew that we’d want you” marc speaks up, surprising you.

“they were idiots, but we’re glad you didn’t get adopted. if that sounds right, you know what i mean” he explains further and you snort.

“i didn’t think i was that bad as a kid” you tell them.

“you’re still a kid” marc reminds you and you scoff.

“am not”

“are too”

“am not”

“are too-“

“shut up, knobhead” steven directs it at marc and you chuckle.

“yeah shut up” you add on.

“you too, y/n” steven adds even further and you make a face.

you lean back into the couch and pull your knees to your chest, resting your chin on top of one of them.

“are you cold?” steven asks and you nod, feeling him get up off the couch and shuffle stuff around in his closet.

you bring your head up when stevens back with one of his barely used sweaters in his arms.

“would you like to use this?” he asks and you nod, making grabby hands towards it.

steven chuckles and tosses it onto you, so that completely passed your hands and lands on your head.

you yank it off you and pat down your hair, it being a bit static-y.

steven comes and sits back down next to you, while you slide the sweater over your head.

once it was completely on, you leaned to the side so that your head was on stevens shoulder.

“is the medicine helping?” he asks you and you nod.

“that’s good” he says to himself. “are you tired?” another nod.

“get back to sleep, kid” marc speaks up, and you nod again tiredly, letting steven move you so that your laying your head in his lap.

marc and jake just observe as steven runs his fingers lightly through your hair, while you work on trying to fall asleep.

which happens pretty quick because of the medicine and the calming sensation of steven playing with your hair.

you were also very comfortable at the moment. stevens sweater was fairly large compared to your own, which was comforting since it felt like they were all just hugging you as you lay there.

“i’m glad she’s back” jake says almost right after you were asleep.

he could tell you were asleep by the way your breathing slowed and you unconsciously leaned deeper into steven, and also clutching his sweater in your hands.

“yeah, we are too” marc speaks for himself and steven.

~~~

steven didn’t mind letting you sleep on him for the hour that you did.

he found it calming after you’d been away for a while.

you eventually stirred awake, right around the time steven would make dinner.

although the three had switched a couple times to be closer to you, steven ended up being the one fronting when you woke up.

“feel better?” jake asks and you groggily nod as you sit up, now leaning against stevens arm.

he chuckles and taps your shoulder the best he can.

“you have to get up darling, i have to make supper” he tells you and you nod, sitting up completely and taking in a few deep breaths.

“i’ve decided that i’ll just make your favorite for you. as a ‘welcome back’” you both chuckle at his statement.

“if you want, you can set the table when you wake up completely” he tells you and you nod, and stretch as he gets up and goes to the kitchen.

~~~

you did end up setting the table, after you completely woke up of course.

you were both eating dinner now, just chatting about whatever.

“so who kissed first, you or casper?” steven asks calmly and you almost choke on your food.

“i’m not answering that” you say, taking a sip of your juice that steven had for you in his fridge.

“aw come on” he teases. “it’s cute”

“no it’s not” you cough, trying to get him to drop it.

“okay fine” he says and you let out a sigh of relief.

“thank god” you hear marc groan, making you chuckle.

“why do you even want to know so bad?” you ask out of genuine curiosity.

“because he’s a lip virgin, so he’s curious about what it’s like” marc answers for him and steven gives him an offended look.

“hey- i’m not.. i’m not a lip virgin” he cringes while you try your best to ignore both of them.

“yes you are” 

steven stays quiet after that, deciding not to fuel the fire.

you’re surprised you hadn’t lost your appetite.

~~~

the night went by fast, you and steven cleaned up and now you were on the verge of passing out again, this time scrolling on tik tok while laying with steven in the bed.

“if you’re tired, you should turn that off” he advises and you reluctantly do as he said, tossing the phone to the ceiling and sticking it there with webs.

“don’t worry, it won’t fall” you say tiredly, while steven eyes it wearily.

“if you say so” he mutters, bringing you closer to him.

you wrap an arm around stevens chest, while your head rested in between his chin and his collarbone, and it was still comfortable for both of you.

“goodnight, kid” marc says and you just hum, already almost asleep again.

the three guys just engage in quiet conversation as well, until they all got tired too.

it was almost 11 when you fell asleep, and almost 12 when they did.

and you all stayed asleep, right?

~~~

wrong.

you woke up at two in the morning because you were bored.

well, that and your stomach hurt really bad. like someone was stabbing you.

you looked at web md on stevens phone and diagnosed yourself with stomach cramps.

so you carefully peeled yourself off steven to go get your bag that was discarded on the floor.

you reached into it and grabbed the legos you bought, the original purpose being a peace offering.

but now you were bored and awake so why not just build it on the coffee table.

and it would’ve all gone according to plan if steven hadn’t woken up.

“what on gods green earth are you doing?” he asks quietly, yet you still jump.

you stare at him for a second. “legos” is what you answer with and steven sits next you on the floor.

you were in a special position on the floor, for it made the nausea go away.

he picks up the box, and squints at the words to read it correctly.

“death star, huh?” he asks and you nod.

“3,803 pieces” you smile at him while he smiles back and gets up to get his glasses.

you know, because he’s a senior citizen.

he sits back down next to you, and you slide over the instructions, which were already about a third of the way done, so that he could see them.

“how’d you get this done so fast- how long have you been up?” he asks concerned.

you sheepishly smile at him and click more pieces into place.

“like a half hour” you say and he gives you a look from over the edge of his glasses.

“you need sleep” he tells you.

“so do you, grandpa” you deadpan and he smacks you in the arm lightly.

“what happened to you calling us ‘dad’?” he asks and you stop building the legos for a moment.

you don’t answer and just keep building them.

“don’t be embarrassed” steven continues and you sigh.

“i just.. i do see you guys as.. as  my dads but it just- i’m not ready yet” you explain the best you can.

“that’s alright” steven assures you and you smile.

“you said ‘yet’, so that’s all that matters” he chuckles and you so the same.

steven debated on asking you a certain question, but decided against it to give you more time.

you guys built a lego death star until a bit past three in the morning.

you went back to bed after you were done, and slept in of course, but you couldn’t have been happier.

your weird sickness came and went as it pleased, certain abilities dialing up to more than eleven at certain moments.

but it was fine, because you had steven, jake, and marc.

and sometimes khonshu.

your dads and your angry grandpa.

your family.

~~~

A/N : almost to 30 chapters!!! thank you all for your support, you guys are lovely.

dont be afraid to leave requests!! see you in two days :) <3

taglist ---

@alexloveskili @ihatemyselfmorethanmydepression @thebiggestsimpshrimp @guyinachair27 @astrobuzzsstuff @mooonlight-and-stars @moonlighting87 @mateihavenoidea @inactive-things @alondrashultz @femalemarvelself @queenthorin1 @haileymorelikestupid @jvdethirlwall @justtiredandvibing @winterfrostsarmy @themapoftinyperfectthings @littlebird101 @atzlena @httpslinow @arrowurboat @m-brekker @lifeandbandmembers-blog @adamcarlsenslvr @violet-19999 @seninjakitey @bestgirlpip @panic-in-the-multiverse @in-between-the-cafes @branolagar @bl6o6dy @annoyingmarvelreader @bee-a-cool-kid @buzzitsbeee @wintergirlsoilder2 @crow-carcass @you-bloody-shank @distinguishedmakerpandapatrol @magnificentcreatorpenguin @50shadesofcrocs @rayrlupin @kingshitonly @brekkers-desigirl @hutaos-gh0st @kayane28

[kreidewaltz]

YEAR END LOVE.

happy holidays and advance happy new year everyone!! this was supposed to be for christmas but.. yeah hope u had a great time w your loved ones <33 this is for my friends who helped me get thru shitty times, who made me laugh so hard, and made me feel appreciated :) to my mutuals, thank u for taking ur time to talk to me!! any interactions from u guys makes me so so happy <3 im proud of you for getting through this year!! this is gonna b a long one .. hehe <3 sorry if i didn't mention u!! i still love u :( this is in no particular order dw dw ily all d same

to my followers, mutuals, and people who likes my stuff in general ツ

AAAAAAA guys ily you rock !! thank u for supporting me and just being there for me (esp for the ones who listened and stayed w my shit !!) ty for liking, reblogging about my stuff, or just interacting w me!! pls pls talk to me let's have some good convo hehe i hope no one will send me or any blog hate bc that isn't cool >:( happiness and love only are allowed people!!!

@sunakissses ツ

my bestie, my bae, babe <3 you rock val if im honest :( even tho we haven't been friends for a long time, we just clicked !! and yeah talking to u is just makes me at ease n u have that comfy vibes :)) and our interactions r so funny and wholesome <33 i just love when im talking to ya you know :(( and idk i love ur supportive aura whenever i do something hehe :( lets keep going next year and be more closer >:) and yes u and suna r going to be the cat's first ever aunt and uncle <3

@romaune ツ

okay .. the literal meaning of sunshine, yes you gracie baby :( you're so wholesome i wanna cry thats me 2 u !! i love your aura and just everything, i get so excited when u reply to my asks fr, because ure so enthusiastic n i like that a lot !!! :( ik we don't talk a lot yet but from our interactions (or just us screamin abt our mans winks) i know i gained a friend, a good n funny friend for that:) and ure so like hinata i wanna squish and hug and talk to!! i love how we scream abt our ongoing suna brainrots HAHA can't forget that <33

@cryoqi ツ

people put ur hands up 4 the coolest person ive met !!!! >:( istg you're so kind and so funny even if thats not ur intention T_T at first i was intimidated by u but then yeah <33 we vibe :( only the real ones know abt us and me bein your bread anon <33 ure rlly great and can't forget d time us and dove sang thru texts ...? yes that i cried while laughing HAHA, and yes i love the way u write 2!! so you and just amazing overall :)) n yeah i like to talk to u a lot in the server !!! ure so funny & relatable at times hihi

@miyasangel ツ

arden bae !!! you're so ... cool and pretty and one of the people i want 2 talk to in here <3 you're like cool and the way you write is chefs kiss >:( and i love it whenever we talk abt random things AHSHS and when we talk abt atsumu <33 i love love that !! n yeah good thing i interacted w u b4 on ur old blog and get to talk to you more !!! i was so shy n nervous while sending you asks sometimes LMAO idk why :(( ure rlly a great friend <3 n i think u also became a factor on why im liking inarizaki :D

@cafemiya ツ

omg hail to issy !! i know we don't talk that much yet but i literally like u a lot >:( you're rlly great w your long fics !! n handmade heaven lead me to you and ur asks <3 and you're so chaotic too HAHA i like that :) dw ill always shower u w compliments bc u so deserve it bby !!! and i squeal sometimes when u reply to my asks w the same energy :(( n yes i just love you and your vibe in general <3 and im so excited 4 the collab !!! <3 thanks for reaching me out hehe or my slowburn fic journey wont happen :( anw ily and keep slayin issy baby!!!! :D

@kuro0luvr ツ

omg kieran .. the big phat supporter of chlojime is here people !!! <3 i just love loooove talking to you esp in the server & we scream abt anything n everything :( and thank u for always giving me support and everyone else when we're down!! you're one of my sunshines 2 :( i love how we just talk and instantly b close friends you know!! even tho we dont chat like in dms we r so close hehe :( and yes ill never forget how happy u got when i complimented that u have akaashi vibes <3 ty for being a good friend n supporter to me :(((

@oikawasbliss ツ

milo everyday !!! >:) i missed our interactions tbh :( you're just so chill n i vibe w u a lot!! your themes omg i want em its so aesthetic and everything <3 and uhm i love ur love for oikawa >< i mean who wouldn't but whenever i see smth kawa related i think of u immediately T_T and yes ure just so so cool :(( lets talk more soon gah and maybe talk abt aot hehe smirks <3 and yes i just like ur themes and vibe a lot <3 lets talk more soon gah >:)

@himichii ツ

I KNOW we didn't talk really like until few weeks ago but ... you're so funny and kind n lowkey sweet HAHA u were so intimidating before i can't talk 2 u <//3 but im glad i did !! not me writin this and listening to the playlist u made for me :( omg thank u for that and the other that u posted, i felt nostalgic and (good) sad on d inside <3 HAHS lets talk more omfg idk what 2 say :( OH oh ure a greatt writer :( the angst u sent yesterday made me sad gah <3 let's talk more in the new years!!! :(

@hajimine ツ

oml lexy bae where do i start??? omg ily like <3 because you're so nice n sweet n so funny 2!! glad i started participating in your ask games and on that we became friends hehe :( i love how we just talk abt anything on your asks <33 like ur life keeps me entertained HAHA and when u became more chaotic n all that .. i liked it!!! :( and oh u write so well if u didnt know >:( can't wait 4 more interactions w you bae !! <3 and ugh omg ily <3 literally cannot express how much :( you have good vibes n i wanna have that too !! and love how we just scream over one man ;D

@lcaita ツ

omg kai ... hi <3 HAHS sorry if im so awkward wtf but ure so cool and so funny !!! i like ur vibes always even tho ure not always around <3 and when youre around i just get happy !!! >< for some reason i love ur name hehe and uhm i love ur aesthetics hehe on ur acc !!! >:) and yes thank u for being a kind friend hehe :( lets talk more next yr abt anything!!! maybe abt ur mans (kaashi, semi, others) hehe ;)

@kemochie ツ

nea !!! i just . wanna say that you're a sweet human being :( and deserve the world :( ik we didnt interact much yet but !!! i love u already n your aura in general <3 and i just get soft on ur username for some reason T_T i love our little interactions from time 2 time n i wanna boost that more on the new years!! <3 idk i like u :( that's it thats my say :(

@nightmareupondaydream ツ

kana baby !!! im so grateful for u whenever u send me sweet words at random times ... and when i need it <3 and i missed our chats in dms :( lets do it again sometime !! im gonna be here for u okay :( and you're so sweet fr i love u,, and yeah just talkin about how shitty life is or how my writing goes, let's do that on the new years oki!! <3333

@ravscrii ツ

thank u for being there like really >< ik u have own probs to solve but you still helped me :( ty for being a great listener and supporter hehe <3 u deserve great things !!! and pls dw okay we're good even tho we arent talking that much :( i miss that hehe n ure a kind and funny person ASHS esp in the server ur replies n everything make me laugh :( lets talk more soon like the old times AAAAAA i miss it hehe <3 and goodluck on genshin HAHA pls entertain me w it even tho i don't play </3

@rintaroll ツ

olivia babe <3 omg i missed u sorry 4 not checking on u :( forgive me <//3 just wnna say u totally made my 2020 better n a little more bearable <3 i like ur vibes sm and ur name .. olivia wow i like it :( and oh you're so aesthetic like ur blog in general ??? hello pls step on me :( and u also influenced me (for some reason) to like tsumu more ?! which i dont mind at all .. i like it when we scream over tsumu or i tease u n him getting horknee :D yeah and god i can't forget the time we fangirled over gojo on ur asks ... and u sent me gojo gifs which made me scream <3 one of my unforgettable moments w ya!!

to my hajime anon + mod ツ

thank u for always being here :( and you just chatting w me makes me so happy <3 i hope you'll see this hehe and just thank u and ily yknow :( when im down or happy, or shitty you're just there, supporting me always <3 im so grateful for that!! and hajime anon mod ily :( thank u for taking ur time to chat w me and make me so happy hehe <3 take ur time okay :)

to my baby, stella ツ

AAAAAAA idk if you'll see this but shoot me an ask if u saw :( uhm i love ur vibes and you're so cool !! promise <3 and your theme changes r always so beautiful <3 pls pls i love you so much agh im so worried when u deactivated :( pls dont overwork okay whenever ure working :( i love talkin to u always in ur asks !!! ure so sweet and lovely grr >:( u deserve all d good things okay ily stel :((

[smalltragedy]

* justice smith, demi man + he/they | you know gabriel de leon, right? they’re twenty three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, six years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 1984 (infinite jest) by the used like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole waking up in a body as heavy as the dead, emotions always on the verge of spilling over - you laugh before the punch lands, the belief that every encounter you have will be the last thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )

hi im just reposting gabe’s intro bc its been a very long time n im starting a little fresh hehe. yes i do regret the text color bt im not going back.

VIOLENCE TW

mini playlist.

ghosting ;; mother mother / roam the room ;; citizen / art of doubt ;; metric / thnks fr th mmrs ;; fall out boy / heart in a cage ;; the strokes / where is my mind? ;; the pixies / flowers grow out of my grave ;; dead man’s bones / 1984 (infinite jest) ;; the used / blister in the sun ;; the violent femmes.

statistics.

full name: gabriel de leon.

nickname(s): gabe.

birthday: october 31st, 1997.

zodiac: scorpio sun, scorpio moon, gemini ascending.

label: the icarian.

hometown: belleville, new jersey.

sexuality: bisexual (masc-leaning).

pinterest.

biography.

it’s only rly ever been gabe n his mom n the little new jersey suburbs that r always the same no matter where they go. they dn’t speak abt fathers or brothers or spain or anywhere other than the now, and how its constantly changing bt oddly the same.

his mom’s name is sonia n we love her. she worked a lot as a single mom n p much hs done everything on her own ever since leaving spain.

they dn’t talk abt spain bt we cn talk abt spain n hw sonia hd grown up partially there n partially in the states n hw she’d originally planned to live there forever bt the man she’d fallen in love with ws involved in some. high class dangerous shit n it ws safer fr them to part even if tht involved leaving everything she knew n loved <3

bt its like. ok. bc she hd gabe <3 n they dnt talk abt it so it practically nvr happened. n she tries her best as a mom n usually tht is enough.

they moved around a lot just bc sonia is a very. flighty person. anxious bt nvr seems tht way is just always. tense. gabe didnt think she ws capable of relaxing fr. a rly long time.

she wld commute 2 nyc every morning n after school gabe wld climb onto the train n by the time he got 2 her place of work she’d be just getting off n they’d get a slice of pizza n sometimes they’d go somewhere like central park or coney island (just fr the novelty) bt most of the time they just got back on the train home w/ gabe either doing homework or napping on her shoulder.

when gabe got a little older he’d sometimes skip school n take the train after sonia had already gone so he cld spend the day in nyc. he liked learning bt didnt rly like school. he nvr properly fit in bc of the amt of times they’d move so it felt like nowhere ws. right fr him.

got rly involved in. the punk scene as a young unsupervised teenager n tht led 2 a lot of like. shitty stick n pokes bt also a love of. very loud angry music n a sense of justice tht he held tightly in his fists. got mouthy towards bullies whether at school or in the scenes he involved himself in n started getting into a lot of fights bc of it.

during this, sonia ended up dating n marrying gabe’s stepdad who he calls craig sometimes bt i dnt think thats his name i wont lie to u guys. its partially a joke n partially purposeful disrespect bc gabriel does not trust a single man bt like. man. ‘craig’ is just an accountant. he’s fine he’s a good dude. they once bonded over like. the mets.

violence tw // anyways. when gabriel ws 16 he got into a super super bad fight tht ended rly. terribly n like listen. nobody died bt it ws just. it got blown up very out of proportion n gabe might’ve gotten expelled even tho he wsnt even the one who started it bt thts okay. ‘craig’, or paul, suggested tht maybe. a change of scenery wld b good fr gabe n b4 they knew it they were. moving to paul-robert’s hometown of irving, north carolina. violence end of tw //

he wld’ve complained more bt. fr sonia’s sake gabe kept it 2 himself. it made her happy 2 see them all get along anyways n like. idk he cld put forth tht little effort <3

bt honestly like. he didnt rly get into too many fights once they moved down here n even tho sometimes he ws like. ommgg. i hate this town .. its so washed up .. he still made friends n like. the only thing tht changed ws tht it ws a lil harder fr him 2 acquire illegal substances.

anyways. currently he hs a tattoo apprenticeship n is a professional piercer n like. he plays guitar n writes songs bt thts more of a hobby rn than anything else. mostly focused on paying his rent at port apartments bc as much as he. loves his mom he does not want 2 live with her forever <3 n thts okay!

personality & facts.

overall xtremely passionate person like god. feels emotions so intensely. every time he opens his mouth n talks abt an interest of theirs its just very like. u listen n ur like oh. gained 2 inspiration. thanks.

clings onto his friends p tightly bc he like. nvr rly stayed in one place fr super super long in new jersey so he nvr made very long term friends n now hes like. very clingy HLKDSHLKFSHLKDG also hates to b alone. subtle desperation behind interactions with ppl he rly wld like to be friends with.

like dnt get me wrong hes gotten into. sm fights bt thts mostly bc he cannot keep his mouth shut n he also cnt stand douchebags he like. always wants to tear them down prob bc he ws a victim of bullying. n u know what. we support him. otherwise he loves ppl bt esp if they hv similar interests 2 him.

like golden retriever who bites kind of. intensely loyal but at the same time is very skeptical. things tht good things do not last very long even though they’ve been doing already fr the last few years.

also bit of a nerd. they were nvr rly a big fan of school bt theres smth abt a good superhero comic tht draws their attention more than like. any english class evr. bt seven soldiers of victory? classic. big dc fan.

uh. very into like. hardcore music. hardcore rock. punk. if its loud n angry they r into it like so so much. hs sm tattoos is like. super covered in them its partially bc they work at a tattoo shop n partially bc they do not know hw to manage their money well.

ooohh u know what theyre. kinda moody i wont lie to u. very defensive like they dnt evr wna talk abt their past. has experienced Things n they do not wish to discuss them. will usually like. deflect frm conversations he doesnt wna hv.

in tune with nature. loves fkn taking walks. hangs out in the woods by abernathy creek n lilac ridge bc nobody rly goes there n its just. nice

tries not 2 take anything super seriously 2 the point where when he does take smth seriously its a little scary bc theyre super intense abt it. forcibly optimistic even tho on the inside he feels like a total pessimist. lots of. deep down insecurities tht he projects by attaching himself p firmly onto others. >.>

so so so energetic. can never stay still. always hs to be moving around. restless like tht. probably got it frm his mom. overly protective over the ppl he loves. probably got it frm his mom as well.

goes onto Tangents bt also divert frm those tangents n is generally all over the place.

always cold n always looks tired n like he hsnt slept in a thousand years n u know what. sometimes he just does not sleep.

oooohh theyre a vegan. totally into animal rights. devious little demi man beyond that .. loves horror n the paranormal n believes in like. every cryptic. will debate u on it.

erm not. the kindest 2 themself theyre a bit self destructive. impulsive. drives very fast n parties super hard. said i will hv my effy stonem moment. u dont hv to gabe.

bt ya! luvs oranges n reds n is maybe a short king. hs an eyebrow piercing n like. a lip ring i wont fk around here he IS living his best emo life in 2021. a little outdated on the trends bt thats okay. probably will tell u hes frm new jersey. its a personality trait. smokes the shittiest cigarettes ever.

wanted plots.

just ghosting along ,, dnt even exist 2 me ,, ;; god. firstly just the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs like. spoken to romantically n then dropped suddenly. n then maybe like. one tht actually Hurt bt they cnt avoid each other bt theyre actively pretending each other doesnt exist n its. hurtful bc it ws like. actually smth nice bt <3 ykno FKLFSDHG

hey hey heyy c’maahn i’m just a little guy ;; n this is the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs probably. pissed off n hs either fought or been on the verge of fighting just. unable 2 resist a good bicker-turned-duel.

just blistering in the sun ;; they cld b close friends bt also they cld also not b bt just ppl who. indulge in bad impulsive decisions with gabe. general bad influences on each other’s health n just. no good! party hard bt at what cost.

n also ;; like ... rly solid good friendships ... flings n maybe an exe or two tht either ended on good terms or just. horrendous, ppl they’ve distanced frm, ppl also frm up north, piercing customers, bt not tattoo customers bc im p sure they’d get fired if they were just tattoo’ing ppl willy nilly, etc.

[staysuki]

aaaaaa i finally read EHALOJ aaaaaa puchaaaaaaa

seungmin had those pogi typings going on lmao i love it v much huhu he was really an ass at the start but i still could bring myself to hate him 👁💧👄💧👁 idk if its automatic bc hes my bias or wut xd

moving on i honestly dont know who to ship y/n with :”> im debating on hyunjin and lee know. and yeji my queen uGh 🤨☹️😠😐 but whatever, INTEOTW yeji has my full heart. hyunjin is oblivious af but i still cant say much since i wouldnt really also believe if someone dearly close to me is a bitch irl even if the signs are 13628 inch by 28251 inch big, colored red with christmas lights.

aaaaa lee know and y/n has those history going on tHat makes me kilig ehe ehe but the typical and cliche ‘main character changed bad boy’ is 🥵 BTCH IDK WHO TO 🚢 ANYMORE 😠 sorry felix but ur bromance with jisung is more than fine already.

anyways the focus is BARELY on seungmin but i keep thinking about him ugh ✨ biaz tingz ✨ thankfully your seungmin smau already started xd

omg you re so good at antagonising people wtf 🤩 like literally all your works have the most detestable characters bc of how hurtful and toxic their dialogue sounds 😎 ur so very super duper amazing x9999 at writing, believe me 😭 you always incorporate the right amount of crack and dark thrilling shit in your stories uWu

BTW I THINK the dates. chapter link is broken on the masterlist and the next button on ch 19. i accidentally skipped ch 20 but thankfully i noticed it bc i got confused since lee know stated on ch 21 that y/n didnt answer him when he asked her on a date wHEN i didnt read anything abt him making a move. i got to the dates. chapter, ch 20, by clicking previous on chapter 21 though. hOPEFULLY U GOT WHAT I EXPLAINED 😭

im soooo excited for the next chapters huhu you did so well like di ako mapakali aYAN GANDANG GANDA AKO NAPA TAGALOG 💀 rly good job 👏

so i checked the playlist you shared and all the songs there are exactly my vibes 😭 they are the singers i listen to and i agree 100% that it hits home. OMG ZACKS VOICE IN BINIBINI SOUNDS SOOO SIMILAR TO HYUNJIN SHXHWHXHWHDHWHS IDK WHY BUT I THOUGHT ABT IT AND I CANT GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD HUHUHU 😭😭😭😭

huhuhu neways its 11 pm here, i might read a few more fics before heading to bed. hows ur day btw?

- bs

uy omg ok 👁

POGI TYPINGS PLS 💀. true, we can never hate seungmin 😤.

and yes hehe, the ships are ALL OVER THE PLACE one’s going to antartica while one’s going to florida or smth idk. but my goal is to just pull on everyone’s strings with that one since i don’t really plan to focus on the romance that much, it’s really more of a slice of life story with shitty people in the mix or smth. but there wILL be an endgoal boy. the key is that even i don’t know who it is 🥴❓ makes it more unpredictable, no? but it probably won’t be until long. i plan on focusing on every character and give them beautiful developments so that’s how many arcs(?) 😀, probs overambitious here but i’m excited to try and make a longer smau after rushing my previous ones + i have a lot of notes for EHALOJ from when i started planning it a long time ago so i already have a basis for season 2 once i start it in the VERY DISTANT FUTURE.

i made INTEOTW yeji the way she is to make up for the fact that she’s one of the antagonists in this story :,). that’s kind of like my own pattern, i want balance. also hyunjin being gaslit by his own sister 😔💔💔💔.

minho ship looking promising for you huh 🥴. felix kinda came out of left field but isn’t he such a cutie. literally everyone’s rooting for yongbokie but i don’t blame em, he’s not like INTEOTW felix huhu.

SECRETARY KIM is a busy man 😤 let him do his job. kim seungmin smau is indeed out and it’s a new character trope!! no more tsundere, confident, and/or snarky seungmin 😌 i’m moving out of the stereotypes here.

and also thank you!!! that means a lot. ngl, i feel like i overdo it(??) like, i want villains to be “real people” and not outright “people made to be villains” ifykwim, i don’t want them to be hated because “hey i’m obviously a shitty person!!!” but because they’re complex and not some 2d bond villain. but idk, maybe i didn’t really have a choice with EHALOJ yeji because SHE IS just like that 🤔. hyunjin is in mental turmoil even. probably my favorite “antagonist” moment would have to be dark seungmin in the earliest chapters. but thank you for the compliments, i love writing dialogue, even my editor irl (for my non-tumblr works) always compliments my dialogue dynamic writing so that’s why i stuck to smaus, it’s just dialogue all the time 🤪. i was a bit afraid the EHALOJ might be a bit too dark to garner any attention (bc nobody wants to see their faves antagonized, valid) but i’m glad i took the risk, it was hard to get through but it’s honestly one of my hate-favorite works and i’m glad others seem to enjoy the twists and turns too despite the obvious lack of focus in the romance.

AND YES I FIXED THE LINKS. SOMEBODY ELSE POINTED IT OUT. HOW EMBARRASSING. MY QUALITY CONTROL IS GETTING BAD 😭💔

and tHANK YOU huhu, i swear it’s finished na, just all queued up hehe, not gonna dump it no no no 👆👇👆, i will follow a fixed schedule of uploading every three days. i think there’s five chapters left in the good ol basement. one of my irks too is that i don’t want smau chapters to be released in succession bc i don’t want people to just see smaus when they scroll through my feed so like, if i already have a lot of buffer posts in between like asks or self updates then i might update early. if not, then imma post other randoms in between.

HWANG HYUNJIN AS FRAT BOY NA TAGA BGC SUPERIORITY. medyo napa 🤨🤨🤨 ako sa exbattallion, that group is such a meme (i remember when socmed was tRASHING pauwi nako for being cringe) but i just respect the vibes and listened to everything 😤. AND SEEEEEEEE. THEIR VOICES ARE SIMILAR OMFG I CANNOT.

my day went great! celebrated my mom’s birthday. out to get tattoos once again. hope you have a good sleep, i’ll always be making fics for you to read 😌♥️ how’s ur day.

[clockworkwhiskey]

instead of ppl asking me to do this i’m just gonna do it for the sake of being bored

Color Asks

red: describe your favorite shirt

i don’t have one but if i do, it’s prob one that makes my titties look big

orange: if you could, would you change your eye color? why? to what color, if so?

yes, to blue because that would be kinda sexy on a poc

yellow: name of an artist you think is underappreciated

billie eilish. she’s very much appreciated but i still think she deserves more. also, arlo parks is a legitimate one

green: do you have a favourite flower?

vaginas maybe i don’t really like flowers like that

blue: preferred type of weather?

idk if this is weather but las vegas at night bc its dark n still warm bitch i THRIVE

purple: a poem you think describes your closest friend

to this day by shane koyczan could make me think of everyone i’ve ever met in my whole life so theres that

magenta: do you keep your fingernails long or short?

short unless i get them did okiiiiiir

turquoise: favorite sea animal?

seals, sea otters, or sea lions omg them thangs can cuddle me at night any night i love them

fuchsia: favorite land animal?

maybe hamsters but also dogs n cats idk i love all animals that aren’t bugs or reptiles

cyan: are you religious? spiritual?

religiously and spiritually that bitch

sea green: can you fold a fitted sheet?

yes

violet: are you a part of the lgbt+ community?

yes

amber: what's saved as your phone's lockscreen?

one of billie eilish’s vogue shots LOL

aqua: do you thrift?

yes but not as much as i used to

pink: what's your natural hair color?

black in the winter but it gets sun bleached easily so probably brown to light brown in the summer if i get out enough

beige: have any pets? what're their names?

mason, kelso, keagan, and berry wherever they all are now. i’m a slut for adopting pets with others

black: would you ever try going vegetarian or vegan?

i did and it lasted 2.5 days but i’ll try again when i have my own place i just really love chicken

coral: an animal you wish hadn't gone extinct

humans before social media

grey: how many languages do you speak? do you want to learn any more?

english, spanish & asl but i’m not fluent in those last two so idk if that counts

maroon: do you care for clothing brands?

no

rose: favourite scent on a person?

pheromones

charcoal: have you ever been camping?

yes *gags*

claret: do you play an instrument? do you want to learn to play any?

yes and i’d like to be an exceptional violin player

copper: gold or silver jewelry?

silver

cream: any piercings or tattoos? do you want any?

yes n yes more peas

salmon: how many pairs of sunglasses do you own?

i truthfully don’t even know

ebony: would you ever want to play a game on television? (jeopardy, family fued, etc)

YES

indigo: have you ever lived on a farm?

no

emerald: if you had the option, would you choose to move and live in another country? which one?

yes n idk where yet but ill figure that out someday

lavender: relationship status?

i’m dating billie eilish n ashley lumba

erin: what was/is your best school subject?

math or english

mauve: any unpopular opinions?

we should all have sex with one another

fulvous: another name you think would suit you

venus 

coconut: a subject you enjoy learning about

everything

frost: a -core you enjoy

a WHAT

porcelain: an tv show you used to love

american idol or the walking dead LOL

fawn: any interesting family stories?

one christmas, the police swarmed my grandmas house cause my uncles bashed in someones knees with bats hahahahahha 

gold: do you wear your socks mismatched?

yes

honey: your thoughts on magic- does it exist?

yes

rust: form of art you enjoy doing?

masturbating

ginger: any sideblogs?

no

cherry: YouTubers you enjoy watching?

binging with babish

wine: do you have a 'type'

physically no but mentally yes

mahogany: your sun, moon, and rising signs

leo sun, aquarius moon, scorpio rising

blood: twin beds, queen, or king?

california king

hot pink: did you/do you had/have strong feelings against the color pink?

no but i have strong feelings towards the color pink we love her

plum: a food you've never tried

caviar

lilac: dogs, cats, or fish?

no fish

amethyst: do you collect anything?

yes

mulberry: earbuds or headphones?

earbuds for public headphones for private

azure: jean jackets?

sure

teal: have a job?

unfortunately

denim: kill the spider or take it outside?

die!!!!

sapphire: do you think you can sing well?

sometimes

mint: favourite flavour of gum?

mint

pecan: shuffle your playlist, what's the first song that comes up?

my boy - billie eilish

penny: icecream or cake

i dont like either unless its icecream from coldstone or that cheap chocolate cake w white frosting on it thats so sweet, u get cardiac arrest lol

ash: can you do your own makeup?

yes but not well

jade: ever written fanfiction?

i don’t think so

grape: how many blogs do you follow?

its in the high hundreds i think

umber: do you brush your teeth before you eat?

yes but i try not to within an hour of eating cause itll taste n feel weird

chestnut: type of phone you have

i think its an 11 pro max

prussian blue: what's your first choice at the vending machine

chips

aquamarine: beach or pool

beach

brass: least favorite food condiment

relish

mustard: how much sugar in your tea/coffee?

not too much

silver: ever broken a bone?

no

rose quartz: rings or necklaces

necklaces

onyx: do you still play Minecraft?

no

burgundy: ever ridden a motorcycle?

i dont think so

scarlet: favorite holiday

thanksgiving

apricot: opinion on 3 in 1 body wash/hair wash

please god no

platinum: do you follow politics?

yes

magnolia: your Instagram handle?

vincentvangoghsrightear

[recordmcqueen]

end-of-year asks

saw a post for this on my dash and figured no one ever sends me asks anyway so i may as well do em all myself umu

so here’s more info you didnt wanna know abt me :D

Song of the year?

hmmmmm thats a tough one but tbh i think clusterhug by idkhow sums it up pretty well and also absolutely sERVED the album we all been waiting for so :3

2. Album of the year?

well- razzmatazz i mean what else was i gonna say omg

3. Favorite musical artist / group you started listening to this year?

ooh sTARTED? probs waterparks then like yea i added turbulent to my playlist a while ago but i didnt actually Listen to them till lately but i am So glad i did :D

4. Movie of the year?

uh uhhh the old guard :3

5. TV show of the year?

i-i dont think i started any new shows this year rip :/

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

BIJ WHO WOULD I BE KIDDING IF I SAID ANYTHING OTHER THAN SUPERNATURAL 15x18 SPANISH DUB OMG I DONT EVEN WATCH SPN LMAOO

7. Favorite actor of the year?

uhhhhh i mean..?? //idk noises

8. Game of the year?

i would say among us but yeet dabson is unparalleled so gotta go with hogwarts mystery uwu

9. Best month for you this year?

either january or december lel

10. Something that made you cry this year?

roughbreakupisroughahem uhhh l i f e :’3

11. Something you want to do again next year?

i- idk?? i honestly have no idea oop- survive ig :p

12. Talk about a new friend you made this year

“a” well i found ac and ashton and kamy and dia and ruby and all yall super awesome wonderful funky beans ilysm 🥺 <33

13. How was your birthday this year?

ask me after tomorrow :|

14. Favorite book you read this year?

tbh the only books i read this year were aftg and capri soooooo gonna go with prince’s gambit cause that thing was legendary :3

15. What’s a bad habit you picked up this year?

...uHmmmmmm closing myself off ig? but its kind of a coping mechanism for my circumstances so yknow :/

16. Post a picture from the beginning of the year

like...of me?

17. Post a picture from the end of the year

if yall want selfie then u gotta slide into my askbox and demand one lmaooo

18. A memorable meal this year?

hanging at timmys with my bestie before we moved qwq 

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

thats a question. uhhhh hopefully an improvement from 2020??

20. What’s something you learned this year?

I AM EPIC N FUNKY N FABULOUS N POGGERS it’s so important to love yourself and its helped a lot. also aHEM not tryna please everyone :/ it doesnt work qwq

21. What’s something new about your place of residence (room, home, or general location) now vs the start of the year?

well im at my grandmas house rn so im basically never going back to the place in question lmaoo

22. Favorite place you visited this year?

bruh its 2020 the only place i explored was my imagination

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be?

uhhhhhhh see on one hand i kinda cringe but on the other if i had Gotten the message from my future self it would likely hinder the ultimate character development i Did go through so yknow ig id just say “good luck” :p

24. Did you keep any New Year’s Resolutions?

...yes and no but yknow what i did technically fulfill it so thats somethin :3

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one

SO MANY LMAOOO but mostly my persona :3 hehe kachow

[caws5749]

This took SO LONG thanks @natthisback

1: Name Madison

2: Age 21

3: 3 fears spiders, not becoming a doctor, becoming like my parents

4: 3 things i love marvel movies, my blanket (whoops), and scrunchies

5: 4 turn ons compliment me, be chivalrous, (idk if this means sex turn on too or not but) moaning my n- ANYWHO uh and the last one definitely like showing you want me

6: 4 turn offs someone who only talks about themselves, being like wishy washy, being arrogant/cocky, complaining about the same things

7: my best friend that would be shea @cloversofshea

8: sexual orientation lesbian

9: my best first date okay SO this like isn’t a first date but it was my first like nicer dinner date so I’m gonna count it. It was just this past weekend actually and i just i loved it so much it was amazing

10: how tall am i 5’2

11: what do i miss honestly, feeling like i was good at things

12: what time were i born 11:14am

13: favorite color purple, although it’s slowly been turning to like a baby light pink

14: do i have a crush yes yes i do and i likes her a lot

15: favorite quote “Truth is a matter of circumstance. It’s not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I.”

16: favorite place Chicago or New York City

17: favorite food SALMON

18: do i use sarcasm yes, but i feel like i don’t use it as much as i used to

19: what am i listening to right now Christmas pop playlist on Spotify

20: first thing i notice in new person whether they only talk about themselves

21: shoe size 8 or 8.5

22: eye color blue

23: hair color right now, it’s a brown that goes to blond at my ends

24: favorite style of clothing so if this means like fav style to wear daily, definitely athleisure. If it means in general, i love love love preppy looks? But not super preppy.

25: ever done a prank call? Absolutely, many times

27: meaning behind my url i explain this in my about me page (linked in bio!)

28: favorite movie captain America winter soldier

29: favorite song i don’t really have favorite songs but rn it’s prob December night by Michael buble

30: favorite band i don’t really have fav bands

31: how i feel right now it’s really hot in here, so warm. I feel okay

32: someone i love i love lots of people but ill stick with @cloversofshea

33: my current relationship status I’ve answered this so many times literally just look at the ask game tag

34: my relationship with my parents um yikes

35: favorite holiday Halloween

36: tattoos and piercing i have i have 6 tattoos! “Breathe” on my right inner ankle, a heart on left shoulder, heart w equal sign in it behind right ear, basically an ecg on my left inner ankle, Aquarius symbol on right bicep, and caws 5749 on my left side. And my ears are pierced.

37: tattoos and piercing i want definitely the black widow symbol in the same place Scarlett got her og6 tattoo, an amino acid tattoo that spells out “wah” , definitely more little tattoos! And maybe more ear piercings idk

38: the reason i joined tumblr so, I’ve had a tumblr for many many years. I originally joined bc my best friends at the time had them, and i was like sure! Ive deleted that personal blog since, and started my new personal blog a few years ago. I also have a studyblr that i started i think back in high school, and i just started this blog back in the end of July!

39: do i and my last ex hate each other no, I’d say far from it bc i likes her a lot

40: do i ever get “good morning” or “good night” texts yes from her and i fucking love it, it used to be a bigger thing almost every day and i loved it

41: have i ever kissed the last person i texted lmao no and for those who were wondering it is @cloversofshea

42: when did i last hold hands LMAO WITH @michelinaamour WHEN I WAS STUMBLING HOME DRUNK IN HIGH HEELS

43: how long does it take me to get ready in the morning it depends, anywhere from ten minutes to an hour and a half

44: have you shaved your legs in the past three days no! I am super lucky and have really light colored hairs on my legs and so i dont’ have to shave very often. Also i just want to say that i personally love shaving my legs and it is my choice to do so.. girls, you do not need to shave!!

45: where am i right now so i started answering this in the research lab, but i am currently sitting at one of the dining places on campus finishing it

46: if i were drunk and can’t stand, who’s taking care of me LMAO DEFINITELY @michelinaamour because she’s done it ALREADY FOR ME MULTIPLE TIMES

47: do i like my music loud or at a reasonable level it depends, in car trips, definitely blast it. But just driving around or listening in doors, definitely reasonable level

48: do i live with my mom and dad nope i live with @michelinaamour

49: am i excited for anything yes, I’m excited for lots of things. I get excited easily

50: do i have someone of the opposite sex i can tell everything to no. I used to

51: how often do i wear a fake smile this is a really interesting question. I don’t consider smiles i give to random people like ordering food or something to be fake, so i would say fake smiles are when I’m not okay and trying to hide it. Which happens less often now bc I’m just much happier of a person

52: when was the last time i hugged someone I think it was @michelinaamour two days ago but i think i hugged @cloversofshea that day too so

53: what if the last person i kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me I’d be heartbroken tbh

54: is there anyone i trust even though i should not yes, certain adults in my life

55: what is something i disliked about today my hair won’t do what i want it to :(

56: if i could meet anyone on this earth who would it be probably Chris Evans or Scarlett Johansson

57: what do i think about the most tumblr and everything with that, or probably her or school stuff definitely

58: what’s my strangest talent i don’t think i have any lol

59: do i have any strange phobias yes definitely haha, I’m terrified of stepping on worms

60: do i prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it i think a few years ago i would have said behind, but honestly I think I’d love to be in front of the camera now

61: what was the last lie i told i actually don’t know. Maybe this past weekend as to like the fact that i was going out on a date instead of just going out with a friend

62: do i prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online I’d say talking on the phone bc then they cant’ see me lmao

63: do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Yes and yes

64: do i believe in magic? Yes, or at least, that’s what i tell myself

65: do i believe in luck yes

66: what’s the weather like right now snowy!

67: what was the last book I’ve ever read The Butchering Art, it’s about the history of surgery

68: do i like the smell of gasoline omg yes yes yes yes yes yes

69: do i have any nicknames yes, madz, madi, girl who lives by the kitchen, queen (a new one) and clown (also a new one) thanks @natthisback

70: what was the worst injury I’ve ever had back in freshman year of college, i did something stupid and my foot swelled up like hell and hurt so bad. There were no fractures detected but the swelling stayed for a really long time, as well as the bruising and pain, and it never returned to normal

71: do i spent my money or save it SPEND IT BABY

72: can i touch my nose w my tongue no I’m not that talented

73: is there anything pink in 10 ft from me. Hmm part of my backpack? And my rings are pinkish bc they are rose gold. Oh and my scrunchie is pink, as well as my iPad

74: favorite animal cat

75: what was i doing last night at 12am i was still at work In the emergency room!

76: what do i think satan’s last name is uh honestly Jim lmao (it’s demons Jim! @cloversofshea )

77: what’s a song that always makes me happy when i hear it so good by dove Cameron

78: how can you win my heart suggest we watch a marvel movie, and I’m prob straight up in love. There are other things too but they’re pretty general, like compliment me, show you want me ya know

79: what would i want to be written on my tombstone haha, as a joke, “so realy its very thing. Just to keep everyone guessing.” But idk something funny

80: what is my favorite word i have no idea, maybe like sophisticated or something like that or aesthetic , champagne is a good one too

81: my top 5 blogs on tumblr ooh! Okay so @markiplier @lesbian-deadpool @americasass-romanoff @lesbianmariahilll @shining-rey-of-sunshine but i love so so so so so many more, and i have a lot of top blogs

82: if the whole world were listening to me right now what would i say fuck trump also I’m gay as hell and I’m growing tired of hiding it from people

83: do i have any relatives in jail not that i know of

84: i accidentally eat some radioactive vegatables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super power of my choice! What is that power lmao this question is great. Prob same powers as Wanda

85: what would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on any weird fetis- JUST KIDDING. Do you still think about them?

86: what is my current desktop picture so on my laptop, it’s fall flowers. But since that’s broken af, i use my iPad and that background is one of the apple ones. It’s just a beach idk why but I’ve never changed it

87: had sex WHY IS THIS IN EVERY SINGLE ASK GAME WTF

88: bought condoms nope i am gay as hell bye

89: gotten pregnant nope i am gay as hell bye

90: failed a class nope, definitely come close though

91: kissed a boy yes

92: kissed a girl yes

93: have i ever kissed somebody in th rain honestly, probably at some point, but I’ve never had one of those romantic kisses in the rain. I really really want to though and i think about it a lot

94: had job yeah, I’ve had three true jobs

95: left the house without my wallet probably

96: bullied someone on the internet no bc I’m not a fucking douche

97: had sex in public not yet

98: played on a sports team yeah, played softball and basketball in middle school

99: smoked weed yeah, but i didn’t get high

100: did drugs nope

101: smoked cigarettes nope, i think i asked drunk once if i could smoke, but my friend was like “really?” And i was like uhhhhhh just kidding haha

102: drank alcohol lmao i drink fucking all the time i mean. I literally have drunk writing nights , I’m drinking tonight too

103: am i a vegetarian/vegan i was a vegetarian for a while, and then an aspiring vegan, and then vegetarian, and then pescatarian now!

104: been overweight no

105: been underweight yes

106: been to a wedding yeah, but like not for a long time. I was like 4 and the flower girl. Oh WAIT. Does playing a wedding count? I played cello at a wedding so i was there???

107: been on the computer for 5 hours straight hell yeah, how would i function not doing this with class and relaxing

108: watched tv for 5 hours straight lmao definitely

109: been outside my home country yeah

110: gotten my heart broken yeah

111: been to a professional sports game yeah. I don’t really do sports though , so when i go it’s usually in suites and I’m just there for the food

112: broken a bone nope!

113: cut myself this is...a. Really deep question but bc i want to be able to speak about mental health on here, the answer is yes.

114: been to prom yes! I went to my junior and senior proms!

115: been in airplane too many times

116: fly by helicopter no, I’m not sure if i want to do this or not

117: what concerts have i been to I’ve been to lots. So first off, I’ve been to hundreds of classical concerts (and performed in them). As for pop, Bruno mars twice, maroon five like three times. Selena Gomez. Josh groban. American authors. Definitely others that i don’t remember

118: had a crush on someone of the same sex yes I’m fucking gay

119: learned another language so if this means fluent, no. I took a decent amount of French and am learning Russian right now!

120: wore make up absolutely. When i choose to wear makeup, its because i fuckign love makeup haha. Most days I’m lazy though and like to let my skin breathe and be natural

121: lost my virginity before I was 18 no

122: had oral sex yeah

123: dyed my hair many times

124: voted in a presidential election okay i think so but honestly can’t remember. But I’m pretty sure i did.

125: rode in an ambulance no and i never want to.

126: had a surgery no and i never want to haha. Well i cant say that. Depending on how my life plays out, I might freeze my eggs or something.

127: met someone famous yes, several I think, but probably Henry winkler was the one I remember most.

128: stalked someone on a social network yeah

129: peed outside nope don’t think so and definitely don’t want to

130: been fishing yes I have been ice fishing and regular fishing

131: helped w charity i have!

132: been rejected by a crush I’ve been not liked back but i don’t think I’ve ever made like a move on a crush and been rejected

133: broken a mirror ooh i don’t think i have actually

134: what do i want for birthday nothing bc i dont’ like my bday

[honeyfreckled]

we have talked a few times and im sorry for this but you are the most accepting and easiest person to talk to honestly i dont have many people in my life i can tell anything real to. but the thing is ive been thinging about relapsing a lot more since i broke up with my boyfriend and i work with him so it makes work depressing and impossible to get through a day without crying sorry this is anon but i am scared ily dont hate me i am not trying to stress you out

ok wow first lemme just say: I DO NOT HATE U. EVER. 

and don’t be srry i don’t have a lotta ppl irl i can tell my shit to so i get it. pls know u can always ALWAYS ALWAYS come to me, and u dont gotta be scared to come off anon. i get it and it’s ok if u prefer it that way- but pls know i dont keep it on alot bc i get hate and then i turn it off bc i gotta look out for myself and dont post all the hate bc i dont wanna bring yall down or give them the satisfaction of knowing i have given it a read and response. so u can message me or make a sideblog or idk im just saying this so if it’s off later u dont blame yrself or feel scared to come off anon. ok sorelapse is a real thing and it’s fucked and hard and addiction is fucked up and a real life struggle and we dont treat addicts w the real tenderness, respect, kindness, and acceptance they deserve. but u DO deserve it. and there are hotlines, apps, churches, groups, chatrooms/boards, and sites that are more versed in what are the appropriate things to say to u- i say this bc while i’ve been thru it w loved ones i have not myself struggled w addiction w substances. my addictions were to self harm and victimhood so those are the things i searched for help on. but if it’s alright i’d like to give u some tips or things i used and have heard work for addicts of substances

places like i said like churches, groups, chatrooms, sites, apps, hotlines the apps and hotlines are good if u cant travel or want to talk to ppl who wont share their story bc maybe u cant hear it like its not the kinda help ur looking for. hotlines are sometimes tricky bc some of those folks are not educated they are volunteers so judgment leaks thru and in that case u ask to be redirected and report that volunteer so hopefully they dont repeat that kinda mess to other vulnerable folks looking for help

make a list of things, anything. list of foods u like to order, list of things that make u clench yr teeth, what were yr fave gifts you’ve ever got, style icons of urs, hobbies u tried that annoyed u, movies u can always watch, places on yr skin u hate being touched, any list of anything it doesnt have to be the usual thing of “what to live for” bc when yr depressed those kinds of things arent easy to think of. but if u get a list going of like “best things ive ever touched” “sounds that make me laugh” “trends that were stupid af” “popular things that i didnt like n couldnt figure out why they were popular” “weirdest ppl ive met” well those things might get u on a roll of good memories or laughing or seeing that theres more to yr life than what has been occupying yr thoughts

dancing. dance in yr room in the dark. clear some space. put on some headphones. lock yr door. do it in the shower. just dance. i had to start w closing my eyes and picking songs that i was taken by emotionally. songs that made me jump and slamdance tbh and then it’s just gotten more and more something im not as ashamed w. i spent a date night w james just dancing and then we ya know ya know bc the dancing got so wild. now i make playlists of songs that set moods for diff kinds of dancing

watch shows w ppl who arent doing better than u. they dont live in fancy places, they dont do much w their lives, they dont dress better than u, they struggle, they arent eating good food u dont have access to. iasip. freaks and geeks. letterkenny. undeclared. jake and amir. tpb. the state. youtube. tiktok/vine comps. lots of these kinds of vibes on youtube

podcasts. improv comedy podcasts tbh saved my life. comedy bang! bang! has best of’s those are good ones to start w. improv4humans bc matt besser has great guests of some of the best improvisers out there and he has musical guests and they’ll play a song and the improvisers will use it as inspo for a scene

make things. moodboards. pinterest. playlists. fill a shopping cart and tell yrself “i’ll get it when i win the lotto and move away from anyone who knows me so i can be the me i wanna be w/out judgement” make tea. make a meal if u can. make yr bed. clean one thing. clean the sink. hang some clothes or go thru yr drawers and clean them out. throwing things out feels hard at first but then it’s nice bc u feel less bogged down

find something to throw yr obsession at for a bit. something that wont hurt u as bad, being obsessed in general isnt good. everything in moderation irl. too much of something is bad just as much as too less of it can be bad. but yr looking for something lower risk here and if u gotta be obsessed w a celeb or a song or a food that’s ok. yr focusing the energy on something that isnt a substance so be proud of it

give yrself a break. give yrself some credit. everyday isnt gonna be on the “best of your name here’s days” but sometimes u just live to live bc that’s what u do. u wait it out and get thru it and wait for the sun to come back out. and if u cant get outta bed. or if you hate yr job and wanna scream- that’s normal it’s more normal than always being happy ppl just dont like talking abt bc society kinda trains us to hide our fucked upness idk why but thats how it is. they dont wanna tell us to do preventative care until we’re in the pits

all in all- it comes down to (at least for me) not planning w an endgoal in mind. it’s not over til it’s over and rlly we dont know. it’s all fluctuating and not meant to be a finish line we cross and then suddenly we’re done and we dont suffer anymore and the feeling of shit is gone or the risk of relapse is gone and the depression is cleared away never to be seen again. it’s not realistic. bc it isnt real. on the real- risk is always there and the downs and ups mix and run together and depression is not curable (this isnt something to be miserable over tho) depression isnt curable, yeah ok, but it is manageable. it can be quieted down from time to time and if u keep up w yr healthy routines and coping mechanisms- depression will still find its way to u bc the real world is not something u can manage. death in the family, loss of money or job, car breaking down, sickness outta nowhere, depression grows wild when these very real life stressors come into our lives. but all that too eventually gets easier and easier at least from a “ok i have some distance now” standpoint. and then as those days get more and more btwn it u can then be like “oh wow, ive made it thru X amount of days! ive put up w it this long! whats one more day, whats one more week, hell might as well see how much prouder i can feel once ive got a year under my belt!” plus u will be more capable of handling the bullshit if u know u can still find some safe places in yr coping skills or friends or resources.

ok so this is prob a mess but bottomline know this:

I love  you and i will be here the best i can should u ever wanna come spill or if u need me to just send u pics of my dog or boring pics of knickknacks or selfies or memes or links or anything just tell me what u need and i will try my best to show u my love. i hope u can see that u reaching out is just already a HUGE major step in the right direction, give yrself credit! thats amazing! yr already doing it pumpkin look at u! it’s hard ik. but i also know if u are capable of saying u have this problem going on, u are capable of getting thru this. u are a light in the world. u offer goodness and u offer yrself and that’s enough. even if yr fucked up right now- u are contributing to the world by simply being u. there is literally NO ONE ELSE WHO IS YOU. so u are unique by definition. i hope u get something from this post and if not i hope it strikes an idea or thing u can do that will help. i hope u know im here and i hope u see this.

i am sending u all my light and love and good vibes and i can’t wait to see or hear from u again. u are never bothering me, a burden, or stressing me out. tbh it stresses me more that u might be struggling and not telling me or anyone. i dont ever want u to suffer in silence bc u feel guilt or scared or anything. u deserve to have a place to voice yr shit. im here to listen if u do wanna tell me anymore.

everyone else-if this helped or if u can think of anything that might help anon or anyone else- feel free to reblog and get some good NONJUDGMENTAL advice or tips and tricks going, but please please please remember to not come off as judgey or flood it with your drama. keep ur drama out of this post so anon or anyone else doesn’t get triggered by it. 

and dont ignore my rule and do it anyway and then say some shit like “ik u said not to but i think this will help lol sorry” like we need this post to stay on this vibe that i set in motion and not a struggle contest or dick measuring or all sad personal reminiscing. go make yr own post for that this is NOT the space.

[2henle]

50 questions tag!

i was tagged by @nothaechan

and im tagging @yoonohho and anyone else bc i have no friends

--

1. what takes up too much of your time?

my phone im ALWAYS on my phone . its a problem

2. what makes your day better?

i rlly like looking at my albums,,, mostly my dream one,,,

3. whats the best thing thats happened to you today?

hm idk nothing special happened lol

4. what fictional place would you like to go to?

the answer is 100% hogwarts okay

5. are you good at giving advice?

idk a lot of the time when someone wants to talk to me abt smth i'll obviously hear them out but i dont rlly like to be a decision maker (??) for them,, so i try to give good advice that doesnt involve giving a direct answer so no probably not

6. do you have a mental illness?

ya

7. have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

no and im so happy abt that

8. what musician inspires you most?

idk tbh music itself kinda inspires me not rlly specific artists (?????)

9. have you ever fallen in love?

no

10. whats your dream date?

picnic!! picnics are so cute!!!

11. what do others notice about you?

how stubborn i am lol

12. what's an annoying habit you have?

uh im rlly spacey (?) so i tend to zone out a lot and thats kinda annoying

13. do you still talk to your first love?

i dont have a first love 😌

14. how many exes do you have?

tbh? i only rlly claim, like, 4

15. how many songs are in your playlist?

546 ksjdjks

16. what instruments can you play?

ive been playing the trumpet for like 3 years, i can play the ukulele and im starting to play the guitar

17. what do you have the most pictures of?

either aesthetics or kpop related things/people

18. where would you like to go before you die?

Thailand!! China!!! South Korea!!!!

19. what's your zodiac?

cap sun, sag moon, virgo rising

20. do you relate to it?

too much omg i hate capricorns

21. what is happiness to you?

being free to do what i want!!!

22. are you going through anything right now?

lol too much

23. whats the worst decision youve ever made?

hm thats private

24. whats your favorite store?

hm idk i like journeys a lot i love shoes

25. whats your opinion on abortion?

omg i have too many. women should chose what they want to do w their bodies. period.

26. do you keep a bucket list?

i actually do have one for the summer! its not rlly getting done tho

27. do you have a favorite album?

i could listen to the we go up album everyday of my life and never get tired of it.

28. what do you want for your birthday?

money lol

29. what are peoples first impressions of you?

that im "cool kinda funny but not rlly smart logical" -my best friend, 2019

30. what age do you seem according to most people?

hm like 15 lol

31. where do you keep your phone while youre sleeping?

under my pillow charging (bc i listen to music to sleep)

32. what word do you say the most?

"stupid whore or just whore or just stupid" - my best friend, 2019

33. whats the oldest age you would date?

probably also about 5 years older

34. what's the youngest you would date?

about 5 years bc its only fair

35. what job/career do you think would suit you?

probs like a lawyer or smth

36. whats your favorite music genre?

i rlly like k-hiphop/k-r&b but also alternative and indie and obvi kpop

37. if you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

probably south korea, canada or thailand

38. whats your current favorite song?

breathe by ab6ix, bet bet by nu'est, thrilla killa by vav, heaven by exo and 121U by day6 lol

39. how long have you had this blog?

idk like 7-8 month's?? oop

40. what are you excited for?

thursday bc i get to go over my friends house & swim in my new swim suit for the first time!!

41. are you a better talker or a better listener?

idk it kinda depends if its like a deep conversation then listener but if im mad then i probably wont hear you out lol

42. what is the latest productive thing you did?

i cleaned my whole room yesterday and MAN was it hard

43. what do you want for christmas?

clothes!!! gift cards!!! albums!!!!

44. what class do you get the best grades in?

other than band? english or history

45. on a scale 1-10 how are you feeling right now?

hm feelings wise maybe a 5 but like physically like a 2

46. what can you see yourself doing in 5 years?

honestly i have no idea

47. when did you get your first heartbreak?

n/a

48. what age do you want to get married?

i dont wanna marry

49. what career did you want as a child?

a marine biologist lol

50. what do you crave right now?

attention from chenle

[dwaekkichaos]

thank you to @honeyboyhao for tagging me in this! You’re the best!

1.) 5 favorite groups?

god ok, Xeno-T, Seventeen, Day6, Stray Kids, NCT

2.) Top 5 on your bias list?

Taemin, Sangwon, Jungwoo, Seungkwan, Hobi

3.) Ult Bias group and why you love them?

(welcome to uwu hours with Mich) Xeno-T! They were the first kpop group i ever got into before i even knew what a kpop was. just these 13 charming, funny, talented boys, and i fell in love. they’ve never released a song i didnt like and these boys just deserve the world and more. they’ve been through so much and they’ve come so far and im so proud of them. 

4.) Ult Bias and why you love them?

Taemin,, oh my god where do i even start. firstly,, a KING, a LEGEND. wow. also he’s so genuine and sweet and then he can be the mischievous maknae at the same time. also meme taem is what im here for lmao. do i even need to mention his dancing and vocals. do i. if u wanna make my heart happy just send me Taemin content

5.) Favorite Kpop Meme

look at my header

6.) Favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one)

he leggy

7.) 5 Favorite Kpop MVs

When You Love Someone- Day6, Clap- Seventeen, Arario- Xeno-T, Boy Meets Evil- BTS, Breathless- Astro

8.) 10 Favorite Kpop songs?

im tired and lazy can i skip this it changes like every 4 seconds

9.) Favorite Kpop crack video?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDwC3Lm0x7Q

this fuckin video

10.) Favorite content creator within the fandom?

idk? i dont really follow specific creators for any groups that closely? 

11.) What fandoms would you say you’re an active member of?

toppklass, army, nctzen, mydays, carats, aroha, vip, monbebe, ikonic, n.fia, universe, fantasy, shawol, whatever stray kids fans are called, once, vav, 

12.) Take your top 3 biases- fmk

F - 

Marry - 

Kill  - 

SIKE i dont have a top 3 biases 

13.) If you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose?

i feel like Renjun has a pretty similar personality to me so im gonna say Renjun

14.) If you could date any idol, who?

idk?? Jungwoo is soft and v much my type but also.. Taemin...

15.) What’s one Kpop album you think everyone should have listened to?

literally every toppdogg/xeno-t album and taemin’s entire discography

16.) Are you a soft or a hard stan?

varies from group to group

17.) An idol that makes you go into soft mode?

j u n g w o o, and taemin

18.) An idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch?

literally anyone short and/or soft,, so,, everyone

19.) Favorite vocalist?

Seungkwan or Jinho

20.) Favorite Rapper?

Jooheon or Suga

21.) Favorite dancer?

do i even need to answer this

obvs Taemin

22.) Things you have in common with your ult?

soft, loses things often, occasionally questionable fashion choices, some tragic previous hairstyles, will roast you,,

23.) The most beautiful trait any idol can have?

feeling they can be honest and happy within themselves

24.) Songs that will always make you jam along?

i have a playlist of Angery Bops bc that’s always the Mood

25.) Your worst wrecker?

Ten, Johnny or Woozi

26.) Any kpop concerts you’ve been to?

none yet but im trying to get bts tickets for later this year!

27.) Favorite choreo?

currently obsessed with Taemin- Drip Drop

28.) Favorite live performance?

that one Arario stage where they look like bananas

29.) Favorite debut mv?

District 9 probs idk

30.) Recommend a rookie group!

listen,, stan VAV,, noone ever talks about my sons,, but also N.Flying (do they still count as rookies??) and IZ! 

31.) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life?

literally every Taemin song

32.) Tag some cute mutuals you’d like to get to know better (and to do this challenge)!

im gonna tag:

@yoongisbandana @blueberryxiu @hotswaggerzuho @jongyuns @reallyreally

[wannasoftimagine]

park woojin as your soulmate

imagine having woojin as ur soulmate where u have to stay within a certain distance of each other at all times

its kinda hard for u to tell wht ur soulmate key is

but once u find out it becomes Really obvious

everytime u try and move to certain places, its like theres an invisible wall stopping u

some days u cant even make it to ur mailbox, other days ure able to go as far as the next city

u figure tht u have to stay within a certain distance of ur soulmate

the only problem is u dont know what exactly the distance is

rip

whoever ur soulmate is tho, they certainly move around a lot bc the places ure able to visit change every week

it makes going to school a bit difficult sometimes

not tht u care

ANYWAYS

one day u find urself able to go further than uve ever really gone by urself before

so ure enjoying the newfound area with wide eyes when u hear an upbeat song blaring from around the corner

u follow it bc ure curious and the song is pretty catchy, so why not?

theres this crowd of people huddled around, cheering someone on

n normally ud prob just walk by, but uve never been here before and ure feeling rather adventurous, so u push ur way to the center

theres this guy dancing in the middle, flowing so seamlessly to the beat of the music that its almost unreal

ure entranced

(itd be hard not to be)

the song ends all too soon, and some of the ppl move on

a few of u stay, and ure more than happy to be one of the people patiently waiting for the next song to start up

u make eye contact with him once, and he flashes a quick smile that makes ur heart flutter in its chest

bc he literally? has the cutest smile tht uve ever seen

and even tho it was only for a second, ure pretty sure u saw a bit of a snaggletooth and that just makes it all the more adorable

so

needless to say, ure absolutely taken with him

eventually another song starts playing, and he starts dancing again

ur mind literally goes blank

like soulmate?? idk them all i know is the cute boy dancing

it goes like that for awhile- he dances, people cheer, u stay and watch and hope u can get a glimpse of another smile

a handful of songs later, and hes shuffling over to u

u freeze bc maybe ure standing on smthn ure not supposed to? mb he thinks its creepy tht uve been here for so long, and he wants u to leave?

nope

he manages to introduce himself, and u find that his name and voice r just as cute as the rest of him

another song starts back up again on his playlist

but this time, its a slower song

its still bright and upbeat tho, just not as much compared to his past music choices

and he reaches out a hand for u and gestures for u to join him

ure like?? no this is HIS THING im not gonna ruin it w my awkward dancing

bc lbr u cant dance nearly as well as he can

but he insists and even as ure worried tht ull chase all the spectators away

he twirls u around and catches u and both of u are laughing and hopping around like nothing else matters

and u feel on top of the world, so enraptured w woojin tht u dont even notice the crowd of ppl cheering on u two and how “cute” u guys are

the song ends as all good things do - way too soon

u make ur way back to ur spot in the crowd, embarrassed, but he keeps smiling and some of the strangers around u clap for u

more of them disperse, and woojin makes his way to u again to make small talk

of course, bc thats The Way Things Work, u end up asking him abt his soulmate key

its kinda awkward bc even tho its impossible, ure hoping woojin is ur soulmate

but what are the chances, right?

lol

he tells u that hes not rlly sure, but sometimes it’s like there’s a physical wall some places

and ure like.. thts cool its kinda the same for me

except for u, it happens all the time and woojin says his rarely happens

and hes looking at u like maybe MAYBE u guys r soulmates and its so unlikely but the more he has the glint in his eyes, the more u want to believe hes right

so hes like okay. this is gonna be weird but give me ur phone number super quick

and u do, and hes like stand there and dont move. ill be right back

and just SPRINTS OFF

u get a call like a minute later and u pick up to hear him wheezing in the phone “try to move around”

so u turn around and try walking and nothings out of the ordinary

but u hear woojin getting into a car on the other end and telling the driver to go as far away as possible

and ure like???? what is going on

but eventually u just. cant move any further

in fact, ure being pushed backwards, which is rlly weird and u yell all of this to woojin over the phone

n after a minute of scrambling and what u think is him thanking the driver, he tells u to try moving again

this time, ure able to take a few steps forward before u have to stop

u hear movement, and then he tells u to try one more time

u do, and u make it a few more steps

hes giggling into the phone and ure smiling bc wait a second

and he manages a “y/n, i think ure my soulmate”

and all u can say is “i think so too”

and its. so so cute and soft and he has to empty out his wallet to afford a ride back to where u are and it takes awhile but when he gets back, he picks u up and swings u around bc he can

u can tell hes still a little nervous around u, but ure still a little nervous around him too, and u kno its smthn tht will fade w time

later, he apologizes for moving around so much and making it harder for u to get places

u tell him its okay, bc now ure going to keep an eye on him so ure never too far apart

he cant look u in the eye bc hes shy and cant stop grinning but he manages a quiet “im glad i met u, soulmate”

and ure just as glad as he is

others: jisung | sungwoon | daniel | daehwi | more coming soon!

[smalltragedy]

* justice smith, demi man + he/they | you know gabriel de leon, right? they’re twenty three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, six years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 1984 (infinite jest) by the used like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole waking up in a body as heavy as the dead, emotions always on the verge of spilling over - you laugh before the punch lands, the belief that every encounter you have will be the last thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them ) 

hllo this is my second child i think theyre p grand n i love them a lot. as always pls like if u’d like to plot i’d lov to interact with everybody

VIOLENCE TW

mini playlist.

ghosting ;; mother mother / roam the room ;; citizen / art of doubt ;; metric / thnks fr th mmrs ;; fall out boy / heart in a cage ;; the strokes / where is my mind? ;; the pixies / flowers grow out of my grave ;; dead man’s bones / 1984 (infinite jest) ;; the used / blister in the sun ;; the violent femmes.

statistics.

full name: gabriel de leon.

nickname(s): gabe.

birthday: october 31st, 1997.

zodiac: scorpio sun, scorpio moon, gemini ascending.

mbti & temperament: esfp & improvisor / sanguine.

label: the icarian.

hometown: belleville, new jersey.

sexuality: homosexual.

pinterest.

biography.

it’s only rly ever been gabe n his mom n the little new jersey suburbs that r always the same no matter where they go. they dn’t speak abt fathers or brothers or spain or anywhere other than the now, and how its constantly changing bt oddly the same.

his mom’s name is sonia n we love her. she worked a lot as a single mom n p much hs done everything on her own ever since leaving spain.

they dn’t talk abt spain bt we cn talk abt spain n hw sonia hd grown up partially there n partially in the states n hw she’d originally planned to live there forever bt the man she’d fallen in love with ws involved in some. high class dangerous shit n it ws safer fr them to part even if tht involved leaving everything she knew n loved <3

bt its like. ok. bc she hd gabe <3 n they dnt talk abt it so it practically nvr happened. n she tries her best as a mom n usually tht is enough.

they moved around a lot just bc sonia is a very. flighty person. anxious bt nvr seems tht way is just always. tense. gabe didnt think she ws capable of relaxing fr. a rly long time.

she wld commute 2 nyc every morning n after school gabe wld climb onto the train n by the time he got 2 her place of work she’d be just getting off n they’d get a slice of pizza n sometimes they’d go somewhere like central park or coney island (just fr the novelty) bt most of the time they just got back on the train home w/ gabe either doing homework or napping on her shoulder.

when gabe got a little older he’d sometimes skip school n take the train after sonia had already gone so he cld spend the day in nyc. he liked learning bt didnt rly like school. he nvr properly fit in bc of the amt of times they’d move so it felt like nowhere ws. right fr him.

got rly involved in. the punk scene as a young unsupervised teenager n tht led 2 a lot of like. shitty stick n pokes bt also a love of. very loud angry music n a sense of justice tht he held tightly in his fists. got mouthy towards bullies whether at school or in the scenes he involved himself in n started getting into a lot of fights bc of it.

during this, sonia ended up dating n marrying gabe’s stepdad who he calls craig sometimes bt i dnt think thats his name i wont lie to u guys. its partially a joke n partially purposeful disrespect bc gabriel does not trust a single man bt like. man. ‘craig’ is just an accountant. he’s fine he’s a good dude. they once bonded over like. the mets.

violence tw // anyways. when gabriel ws 16 he got into a super super bad fight tht ended rly. terribly n like listen. nobody died bt it ws just. it got blown up very out of proportion n gabe might’ve gotten expelled even tho he wsnt even the one who started it bt thts okay. ‘craig’, or paul, suggested tht maybe. a change of scenery wld b good fr gabe n b4 they knew it they were. moving to paul-robert’s hometown of irving, north carolina. violence end of tw //

he wld’ve complained more bt. fr sonia’s sake gabe kept it 2 himself. it made her happy 2 see them all get along anyways n like. idk he cld put forth tht little effort <3

bt honestly like. he didnt rly get into too many fights once they moved down here n even tho sometimes he ws like. ommgg. i hate this town .. its so washed up .. he still made friends n like. the only thing tht changed ws tht it ws a lil harder fr him 2 acquire illegal substances. 

anyways. currently he hs a tattoo apprenticeship n is a professional piercer n like. he plays guitar n writes songs bt thts more of a hobby rn than anything else. mostly focused on paying his rent at port apartments bc as much as he. loves his mom he does not want 2 live with her forever <3 n thts okay! 

personality & facts.

overall xtremely passionate person like god. feels emotions so intensely. every time he opens his mouth n talks abt an interest of theirs its just very like. u listen n ur like oh. gained 2 inspiration. thanks.

clings onto his friends p tightly bc he like. nvr rly stayed in one place fr super super long in new jersey so he nvr made very long term friends n now hes like. very clingy HLKDSHLKFSHLKDG also hates to b alone. subtle desperation behind interactions with ppl he rly wld like to be friends with.

like dnt get me wrong hes gotten into. sm fights bt thts mostly bc he cannot keep his mouth shut n he also cnt stand douchebags he like. always wants to tear them down prob bc he ws a victim of bullying. n u know what. we support him. otherwise he loves ppl bt esp if they hv similar interests 2 him.

like golden retriever who bites kind of. intensely loyal but at the same time is very skeptical. things tht good things do not last very long even though they’ve been doing already fr the last few years. 

also bit of a nerd. they were nvr rly a big fan of school bt theres smth abt a good superhero comic tht draws their attention more than like. any english class evr. bt seven soldiers of victory? classic. big dc fan.

uh. very into like. hardcore music. hardcore rock. punk. if its loud n angry they r into it like so so much. hs sm tattoos is like. super covered in them its partially bc they work at a tattoo shop n partially bc they do not know hw to manage their money well.

ooohh u know what theyre. kinda moody i wont lie to u. very defensive like they dnt evr wna talk abt their past. has experienced Things n they do not wish to discuss them. will usually like. deflect frm conversations he doesnt wna hv.

in tune with nature. loves fkn taking walks. hangs out in the woods by abernathy creek n lilac ridge bc nobody rly goes there n its just. nice

tries not 2 take anything super seriously 2 the point where when he does take smth seriously its a little scary bc theyre super intense abt it. forcibly optimistic even tho on the inside he feels like a total pessimist. lots of. deep down insecurities tht he projects by attaching himself p firmly onto others. >.>

so so so energetic. can never stay still. always hs to be moving around. restless like tht. probably got it frm his mom. overly protective over the ppl he loves. probably got it frm his mom as well.

goes onto Tangents bt also divert frm those tangents n is generally all over the place.

always cold n always looks tired n like he hsnt slept in a thousand years n u know what. sometimes he just does not sleep.

oooohh theyre a vegan. totally into animal rights. devious little demi man beyond that .. loves horror n the paranormal n believes in like. every cryptic. will debate u on it.

erm not. the kindest 2 themself theyre a bit self destructive. impulsive. drives very fast n parties super hard. said i will hv my effy stonem moment. u dont hv to gabe. 

bt ya! luvs oranges n reds n is maybe a short king. hs an eyebrow piercing n like. a lip ring i wont fk around here he IS living his best emo life in 2021. a little outdated on the trends bt thats okay. probably will tell u hes frm new jersey. its a personality trait. smokes the shittiest cigarettes ever.

wanted plots.

just ghosting along ,, dnt even exist 2 me ,, ;; god. firstly just the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs like. spoken to romantically n then dropped suddenly. n then maybe like. one tht actually Hurt bt they cnt avoid each other bt theyre actively pretending each other doesnt exist n its. hurtful bc it ws like. actually smth nice bt <3 ykno FKLFSDHG

hey hey heyy c’maahn i’m just a little guy ;; n this is the vast amt of ppl tht gabe hs probably. pissed off n hs either fought or been on the verge of fighting just. unable 2 resist a good bicker-turned-duel.

just blistering in the sun ;; they cld b close friends bt also they cld also not b bt just ppl who. indulge in bad impulsive decisions with gabe. general bad influences on each other’s health n just. no good! party hard bt at what cost. 

n also ;; like ... rly solid good friendships ... flings n maybe an exe or two tht either ended on good terms or just. horrendous, ppl they’ve distanced frm, ppl also frm up north, piercing customers, bt not tattoo customers bc im p sure they’d get fired if they were just tattoo’ing ppl willy nilly, etc. 

[imjohnnydora]

1-117 :))))

EMMALINE THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT BY PLS ASK ME A QUESTION

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reasonyou are confused right now? well now i’m confused bc i’m trying to figure out why this question thinks im confused

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? lol no

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care? i would?? care if they smoked often yes but not like every once in a while yknow

4: Do you find it easy to trust others? LOL NO

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night? watching scandal i think

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is withyou? pal i dont get drunk but if i did i’d??? be with whoever i trusted to get drunk with i mean

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheatedon? ngl i’d call up all my friends bc i know they’d form a lil army to fight back for me

8: Are you close with your dad? im not rly close with either of my parents tbh

10: What are you listening to? uh my happy spotify playlist

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life- what is it? answered here

12: Do you like hickeys? no

13: What time do you go to bed? .....5am-ish

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down? i mean not to vague or anything,,,

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both? no

16: Do you always answer your texts? lol no

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for? answered here

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends? like talk in person or message bc 6 hrs ago to the former

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you seethem? yes

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed lastnight? do people like actually remember that i mean who

21: Is anyone else in the room with you? i hope not

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around? uh sure

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now? yes?

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with? YES

25: In the past week, have you cried? haha yes

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing? blue w yellow flowers

27: Do people ever call you by your last name? no

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now? dont think so

29: Do you have a best friend? @katxedisons

31: Who was your last call/text message from? my dad lol

32: Are you mad at anyone? nah

35: How many more days until your birthday? 227 (thanks google)

36: Do you have any summer plans yet? there are literally 11 days left of summer and,,, no i dont have plans for any of them fuck off

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex? no

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now? noooooooooo

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone? dont think so

41: Do you think age matters in relationships? um yes dont be a pedophile

42: Are you available? answered here

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings forsince high school ended? ....one

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would youget? nose i guess

45: Do you believe exes can be friends? idk i have no experience in this

46: Do you regret anything? every moment since birth

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now? this question i mean

48: Did you ever lose a best friend? yes

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like? LET’S NOT DISCUSS THAT

53: What was the last thing you ate? granola bar

54: Did you get any compliments today? yes

55: Where are you going on your next vacation? los angeles!!!

56: Do you own anything from other countries? um yeah the things i purchased in japan and australia and the things my friends have gifted me from??? too many places to list

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls? girls

58: Where have you lived most of your life? california

59: When was the last time you took a long drive? like i personally drove or was just in a car and also what is “long” and okay basically no i dont go on long drives anyway so

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle? what do u think

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house? no

62: Who do you text the most? my dad probably,,, listen i dont text people

63: What was the last movie you saw? spiderman??

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend fromgoing back to their ex? my who

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011? i was 12yo

67: Do you curse around your parents? no

68: Are you happy with where you live? ehhhhhhh no

69: Picture of yourself? why is this question 69 that makes it so sketchy and also no im too lazy to add a photo if you’ve read this far ur probs my friend and know anyway so

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe inopen-ended relationships? monogamy

71: Have you ever been dumped? that would require a gf

75: What part of a person’s body do you find mostattractive? idk their face??

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night beforeyou went to bed? my god dont make me check timestamps i think @katxedisons

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesysmile to your face? CUTE GIRLS

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a childalready? i mean i wouldnt count it against them

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed toyou? not like,, directly

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush? like,,, do i tell the crush or do i tell my friends about the crush altho tbh neither

83: Do you miss your last sweetie? who says sweetie

84: Last time you slow danced with someone? prom

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met? n oooo oo

86: How can I win your heart? be a cute girl tbh

87: What is your astrological sign? taurus

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM? still watching scandal i think

89: Do you cook? i bake

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flameafter a time of more than 3 months of no communication? no

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in arelationship? YEAH

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you prettymuch fall into monogamous relationships quickly? latter

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potentialinterest? not that i have a type but,,, long dark hair is a good bonus (also if ur??? amy santiago)

94: Name four things that you wish you had! a girlfriend, a corgi, $1 million, and dammit thats all i can come up with thats the dream tbh

95: Are you a player? no

97: Are you a tease? no

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr? not yet

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone? ehhh no

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with? i mean??? i dont see why not

101: Hugs or Kisses? ngl i’d like to kiss a cute girl

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out? i mean i havent yet so

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? gross

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe? YES

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/shewas in relationship, would you go for it? NAH

106: Do you flirt a lot? ahaha i mean sometimes

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be? amy santiago

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next? IF U KNOW PLS TELL ME

112: Does someone like you currently? sounds fake

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone? yes

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or justflings? former

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship? i mean im rly happy with either

117: Your own question that you want me to answer. Justwrite it. dammit emmeline u had one job

[chelsanitys]

anon post

for all 3 of my fans

i live for ur wit and sass

thx n same

Dont fuck with the best! Kate works hard to get the craziest anons to post in her yard, and I've got nothing but respect. There's no fan in the fandom as genuine and earnest as she is. Wishing her and her cats a long and healthy life!

lmao yall need to quit

you've probably answered this already but what do you think will give vm the best shot at the OG?

a good short dance + a good free dance + gui missing the catch-foot on his twizzle again

Are you taking the bar exam this summer?

no i just finished my first yr

I will cry if T&S end up together, They would be a horrible match. Surely I'm not the only one who sees this??

i am ashamed that this is the level of trollin i get. step up ur game!!

"i hope tessa marries semple so i can see all the shippers cry tbh" Poor Alex! Marrying him would probably restore his self confidence and prompt a return to the cfl! Still holding out hope!

honestly alex was the hottest of all her bfs. fedor is balding, has a dad bod n is wearing khakis on the beach now. and semple was always fug. also rl talk i didnt know canada had its own football league until this guy came around. thats so cute for canada

"i hope tessa marries semple so i can see all the shippers cry tbh" I want her with the Bitove guy. His family looks like the type that will post tons about them on sm afterward.

lmao yall know his grandfather started the toronto raptors?? i knew this brodie’s last name sounded familiar. also apparenty he and his fam golf at trump’s resort @ mar-a-lago VOM. tessa is 500% going to end up with a smarmy, filthy rich trust fund kid like him like its not even a question

Hey now. I want shippers to get overthemselves, too, but Tessa marrying Semple, god no. Basically, Tessa, open your eyes and save yourself.

lol i actually wish she was still dating him so all this mindless speculation rn would stop

Bitter and hateful is what I come here for. Anons should just fuck off and go to the Disney website if that's what they want.

vm fans are so damn soft n sensitive about everything lol, i rly wish some of yall would stop taking everything i say so seriously

Please come back, without your snark the fandom is controlled by the most delusional shippers.

i’ll post more when there r actually things 2 talk about. being around here when nothing is happening and ur all screaming into a vacuum about the same things over and over is like being institutionalized in a loony bin

why are you always up so late?

nhf for this east coast bias, it is a perfectly reasonable time in california

Which of the current/rising juniors do you see making tbe most impact next quad?

carreira/ponomarenko are going to win a olympic medal in 2022. even if the shibs, h/d and bock don’t retire, i see them easily rising through the pack - they just have the Look and aren’t without talent. i’m iffy on the rest - mcnamara/carpenter are too creepy and weird, parsons have no height difference and are siblings, both are coached by an unproven staff, everyone else are varying levels of mediocre. hawayek/baker will go to worlds 2018 if they’re lucky and prob never again if no one else retires.

i wouldn't take h/d's music choices as an indicator of what vm will have. they are the c team and vm are the a team in that camp. look at last season... h/d got stuck with marie-france's lame ass idea of the evolution of music and vm got prince.

true..... altho i think personal taste is important too. tessa would die b4 she ever approved an ‘evolution of dance’ sd

I want Tessa to steal Fedor back from Meryl. All that drama would be hilarious. Fedor lost his looks and is butt ugly now so he is exactly Tessa's type, even more so than in 2009.

i nvr thought he was that cute but he literally looks like he goes door to door selling pool cleaner now

I noticed that when Tessa shakes hands or kisses someone on the cheek (like during medal ceremony or interviews) Scott often puts a hand on her lower back even though there had not been any physical contact between the two of them before said handshake or kiss. It just always surprises me and I'm not sure I understand why he'd do this. What's your take on it ?

lmao ik u want me 2 say its bc his subconscious is screaming out in jealousy and he wants to covertly claim her and show the world she still belongs to him but i rly think they r just touchy ppl who like to touch. or hes makin sure she doesnt lose balance and fall off the podium as she’s leanin over

moulin rouge would've been a much cooler choice in 11/12 for their musical fd instead of funny face, but i don't see them doing it for their olympic fd. it's a bit tacky and overdone. i figure they'd want to do something that's a little bit more special and unique then that.

ia it wouldnt have been a bad filler fd for an off year. i just dont see it doing it for their Last Ever and for the olympics. its such a warhorse - what could they possibly say with it thats original? and its such a character piece - they r such overly emo, earnest ppl, i dont think they’d want to do something that different from themselves for their Last Ever. 

huh what, vm don't stand a chance against moonlight sonata?? Pls... that would be a flop, such an overused piece of music everywhere, it's like Für Elise - hearing the first notes of it makes me vomit in my mouth a little

ya bc no one’s ever won a gold medal skating to a warhorse before

it sounds more believable to me than vm and moulin rouge tho

What interpretation? PC will just float around. They can do that in any key and judges will eat it up.

true, gui gui is a demon

No way. The judges will think they're watching Gordeeva/Grinkov again and just hand the gold to them immediately.

remember when pc said they didnt even know who torvill and dean and g/g were lmao

If scott doesn't cut his disgusting gutter frat boy hair I'm renouncing my Canadian citizenship and moving 2 Peru

was legit lookin @ pics from autumn classic n skate canada and i cant believe how short his hair was then, i can not believe i was complainin so much. i am honestly such a whiny bitch lmao this is my punishment

i have mixed feelings because Prince is the best short dance of VM's career so far but then Latch was one of the worst lol. It dragged in a lot of areas, especially the middle, and it never felt complete. I don't hate it by any means but considering we only had 2 free dances left and that was one of them... :| so I'm torn between trusting MF, and then thinking she's one misguided song choice away from ruining VM's swan song.

the thought of mf picking out the music for vm’s last ever fd makes me kind of sad. like yall have no ideas? at all?? ur relying on instagram suggestions and mf’s adult lite fm spotify playlists for inspiration? im surprised n disappointed tbh, like they arent kids anymore, i thought they would take more ownership of their careers. 

but idk we’ll see. whenever i complain a lot, i usually like their material later lol

why do i feel like vm are gonna come out in their sd with despacito... the justin bieber version...

ok who is this person who keeps sending me despacito questions?? you sound like you want it to happen more than anyone else and are trying to will it into existence

It's funny because Tessa is SO cautious about everything she/they say, that she comes off/is rehearsed--I don't understand why she cares so much. They are not politicians or even super famous. Plus most people who watch (excluding Tumblr fans bc they're all extra) watch during high times like Worlds and Olympics. Most people don't watch interviews and press conferences. If they do watch one, it's usually only the fun "game" interviews or the mainstream ones like etalk which they are not tons of

idk what this is in reference to but ok lol. it prob matters to her bc its her life and she cares bc its happening to her? just spitballin here

Oh no what has Max Trankov said I'm scared to know now. If he's a Trump fan I might have to #nopeout lol he’s russian and a male chauvinist pig. he once said he wouldnt do a quad with tati until she had a baby for him...”and then maybe we try”

still gonna stan his trash ass to the end of time tho

Speaking of bad music cuts I could not stand the way HD's music was cut this year. Like I like all the songs they used individually but it just felt so weirdly put together like the songs didn't flow well into the next. The only part I liked was the last part with earned it.

really? i thought earned it was the part that seemed completely out of step with the first 2 pieces of music. the transition was way off and the tempo was so much faster than the other 2

The Facebook q&a is the first time I felt vm are actually compatible enough to be a couple.

should’ve published this steaming hot take when u sent it a month ago bc i have no idea what this is in reference to now

what do you look like?

tired mostly

haha funny how we went from vm are in a relationship to they hate each other.

dont ‘we’ me bitch i have nothing to do with this fandom’s daily emotional yo-yo-ing

Can you explain the Tessa/Kaitlyn Weaver friendship? Are they really friends? Kaitlyn seems like the kind of girl Tessa would make fun of behind her back.

more like kaitlyn weaver is tracy flick and is trying to bring down everyone in her path tbh

I get a bit of a superiority, cold vibe with Tessa, don't you?

no but i dont have self esteem issues

I think people who find Tessa cold and snobby do not get her at all. Yes, she is far from perfect and her feminism is all (...) but to call her cold and unfeeling means you haven't been paying attention at all. Like get off her dick and/or stop following her career.

i dont think shes cold either. standoffish maybe, but i dont feel like thats from superiority or aloofness. some ppl just want to mind their own business and chill?? not everyone’s a chatty cathy like scott

Music stresses me out. The only thing I've gathered from all of the various discussions is they should be exciting but not too exciting because it's an Olympic season. But they shouldn't also be too safe. Like I know you have mentioned various choices that would be good but what would be in your mind the ideal program, both SD and FD. It's their third Olympics, so how do they build on the past while still being fresh but also them. Or do they just not and give the audience what they want?

something original thats not a warhorse but is also audience friendly and is instantly musically palatable to a lot of ppl

so basically mahler

Which songs from moulin rouge should they use?

if they were doing mr (which i doubt), the orchestral score is 500x better than the cheesy ass nonsense from the soundtrack. like come what may with nicole kidman’s tremulous bird vocals and ewan mcgregor literally straining not to pop a vein would almost be too dramatic and Too Much. i think that kind of thing only works for a v specific kitschy, performative kind of team (a la russians) and wouldnt vibe with vm’s super earnest approach at all. but the orchestral score is genuinely moving and effective in a less garish way

but i dont think they’re doing moulin rouge lol

"the movies honestly made it hard 4 me to interpret hermione’s undying loyalty and devotion to harry as anything other than latent sexual attraction tbh lmao" Hahaha, pretty much. Plus, the whole Harry and Ginny thing, even more so in the movies, seemed to come out of nowhere and was cliche as fuck.

is bonnie wright still acting? i’ve seen dead fish more alive than her on screen

LMAO someone posted a clip from VM's show when they were having dinner with WP and they were talking about how WP live together and they ask VM how they deal with one another and LOL I stg I started loling cause their reactions were #priceless. S literally just had a WTF look on his face while he said something hella awkward & T looked like she wanted to slap him. Her follow up that she doesn't think they could ever spend all their time together just cements why they'll never date for me.

lmao that whole scene is so stupid. kaitlyn n andrew r such good friends i swear

Thanks for setting that anon straight. Set some boundaries so that they don't egg on shippers?? WTF. They're fine with doing what they're doing, and if they're dating others, those others are obviously fine with it too. Besides, it's not like they're filming porn or something. If you can't handle it, stop watching them.

idek what these r in reference to anymore but it sounds dumb as hell lmao

Wow I cannot believe that people actually think VM owe fans any explanation for their relationship/partnership. Like we don't know them, we're never going to know them or be friends with them? Why the fuck do they owe fans a detailed explanation of their personal business? I stg these shippers have lost their damn minds. As long as VM continue to put out good programs and do well I couldn't care less what they're doing off ice. Whatever it is it's clearly working for them. You do you VM.

the entitlement of some fans is insane. its STILL happening now with tessa’s ig now too. why dont yall just let her live n let her white-girl post to her hearts content. she is literally doing nothing differently to what every other skater does, idg this absurd criticism

Fr tho both of them have such nice teeth and I've never seen pics of them with braces, like how??!?!

tessa’s r so nice i cant believe she’s never had braces. and they r such a natural white? like u can tell w most skaters that they get it professionally whitened but hers dont have that artificial look at all

Are you in college? Your bio says 23 but it said that last year too.

i actually turned 24 a while ago im just 2 lazy to change it. im in law school currently

I just read an ancient interview with vm where they said Mahler was about getting married or something... WHAT

ya i cant remember if it was them that said or marina that said it tho. i remember a story about a guy who wrote them saying he and his gf were watching mahler at the olympics and once it was over, he was so moved he got down on one knee and proposed to her and marina was like ‘thats what that program is meant to do’ lol

Do you think Zach is a good skater and partner? I keep changing my mind on him.....

he is such a bland, wet noodle - no taste, no flavor, just empty white carbs. its up to madi to add any spark to the team bc she’s the real star, he just stands there and is tall and can lift her

Why the fuck are so many people freaking out because Tessa did not attend a wedding with Scott. 1. They are not dating so there are no reason for Scott to bring her. 2. She has people visiting 3. I bet they don't even hang out off ice 4. I think Scott has a secret girl in Ilderton. 5. TS not dating. I wish people would claim down.

this is so far back in my inbox i have no idea whats happening

I love it that whenever Tessa posts an IG story the fandom goes crazy analyzing and speculating about Scott what there even when he is clearly not Then there there are talks about TS wedding. WTF Soon it will be TS having babies. I am wondering if maybe the fandom (new fans) are mixing reality with those fanfics.

honestly no clue

I know this has been discussed before but I don't get how Scott and Jess even communicated. Jess could barely seem to understand English back then and Scott couldn't speak French. I wonder if them not being able to speak to each other is part of why they lasted so long actually

lol bryce davison actually learned french so he could communicate w/ her. not scott tho lol

I don't think T cares too much about fs friendships the way other skaters do. Of course she's friendly with a lot of them but she's not really close with anyone except her partner, which doesn't really count lol. She has her own friend group outside of skating and that's what she seems to stick to. It's funny you mention Meryl, Brooke, Tanith, and Lauren because they're all still really good friends.

honestly i think skating stressed (stresses?) her out so much back then that she really hated being in that world for too long. i dont blame her for wanting to disconnect and not having to hang out with skaters who just talk about other skaters and skating 24/7

I don't mean this in a mean way. Watching Avatar.  If you paint Meryl's face blue she could be in the movie 

it kills me when ppl say she looks like a disney princess? ya the ant queen from a bugs life maybe

I think Tessa sometimes forget that Scott is a huge part of why they are successful and she wouldn't have all of these deals w amazing brands if they weren't so strong+didn't win everything. it's easy to put her on the pedestal bc she's gorg and can dance, but he should get/deserves just as much credit-- i mean he is the one lifting her and she could not do any of this by herself. sometimes i get the vibe that she thinks she's too good for him. maybe he's not as fancy, but he has a heart of gold

i’ve literally never gotten that she thinks she’s too good for him...? they go out of their way to pay each other compliments all the time and dont even jokingly diss on each other. its actually kind of weird that after knowing each other so long their relationship isnt just one long roast section where they talk shit about each other bc thats what my relationship w/ all my lifelong friends r like....but then again im a flinty bitch and they’re super earnest and emo like all the time. like i bet they both cry during sex

i find it kinda gross, disturbing and a bit pathetic that so many people feel the need to write erotic fan fiction about Tessa and Scott--like they are real people not characters, and it's kinda creepy that people spend so much time writing and reading them. Also, i would pay a million dollars to have someone show TS what people write about them--they would literally die and so would i--some fans are kinda extreme crazy

u know how on graham norton when he’s always showing celebs really erotic fanfic and fanart of themselves and they’re just dying of embarrassment?? i would literally pay everything in my bank account (so like....twenty dollars) for someone to do that to vm

omg it's gonna be so awk when tessa and scott have to see klawes...poor klawes, she just could not hold a candle to tessa. still don't know why klawes still follows tessa's insta--like i would unfollow and would not wanna see some of the pics t posts of TS giving each other lovey looks/touchy regardless of whether ts are together or not. also, it's never like t and klawes would actually be friends bc they're polar opposites

v disappointed that the olympic summit did not deliver on this #drama

tessa and kl were real friends tho, i think its sweet. and its nice they still keep in touch even tho scott is a dog

Are you a fan of tessa's style? She wears so much expensive yet ugly shit in my opinion.

lmao no. i think some of her casual wear is cute, but she wears some of the most hideous high fashion shit ever when she’s going out. like that blue carpet jumpsuit? yall know wht im talking about. those hideous trousers??? also she wears an unbelievable amount of boring black dresses

also gf needs to do smth with her hair. tired of her high bun and slick pony. she looks way cuter w/ her hair down imo

Do you think Tessa pays for all the Adidas stuff she wears?

no she def gets it for free. i was a walk-on my freshman yr of college for half a second and even i got a bunch of free shit from nike

How do u as an ed sheeran unstanner feel about ts doing these songs their obviously using him for the sd next season and i wouldnt be suprised if they use him for the fd as well

reading this made my cholesterol go up

really hope they're exhausting all the ed sheeran options now so they won't actually use it for comps lol

ngl i do kind of dig that embarrassing white boy rapping galway girl song but that cld prob just be my girl saorise ronan hypnotizing me like she always does

Minus the horrific man bun, do you think Scott's hot? Also, do you think Tessa finds him attractive?

no and probably yes now that hes so fug

Do you think Scott's attractive?? Also, do you think Tessa being told she's beautiful constantly on sm has made her get a big head--she often comes across as a bit cold and stuck up prancing around in her $1000 + outfits? Love her and she's gorgeous but...

some of yall need to stop projecting your shit onto tessa for real 

Power plays of the figure skating journalists. Inside Skating does a very literal interview and article with P/C which blows up and then they go to Jackie Wong so he can basically write up a damage control press release. Kind of fascinating to see both journalists doing their thing with the same content. Hard to believe Inside Skating didn't think their article would create a storm. Interesting.

speaking of jackie, skaters r really going to him for their exclusives now huh? dying that ashley gave him her big la la land fluff piece instead of tsl. pays 2 be nice and kiss ass

Doesn't look like KH/JLB will have much of a chance to advance cuzis so crowded with the current seniors not retiring and juniors moving up. KH/JLB needs to work on their twizzles, thier lines, skating skills, chemistry looks promising. Some of those junior and senior teams should consider representingif they want a chance at aCanada doesn't have any promising teams once VM-WP retire. I feel like CB, SS, HD ain't retiring till they win Wch or OG which may never with PC around.

hawayek/baker could prob skate for gb because jean-luc has citizenship and carreira/ponomarenko could prob skate for canada bc she’s from montreal but i doubt the us fed is letting either of them go. they’ve invested way too much at this point. i don’t think c/p need to move tho, i think they’re talented to rise organically through the ranks. i think they’re more likely to be us #1 instead of not tbh

I don't understand the whole David and Tessa affair; like some people say it happened after he was separated and others talk like it was a full blown affair. The only thing I do know is that her being called a "homewrecker" or anything else of that nature makes me want to punch something because it's disgusting, and it's society go-to response. Be cruel to the woman and basically give the man a free pass. But maybe he received shit, too? I just never heard about it.

i think he was basically separated but not divorced when it happened

Do you think if TS and Cappelini and Lanotte switched partners they would be a good team?

lol no. anna’s not a great skater and luca looks like he’s shorter than tessa

Wait is that Tessa's ex Semple in that photo you posted of her pre and post nose job? Cause if so damn does she lowball herself. Like she could have such better looking guys I do not understand. Girl is very pretty she needs someone to help her pick better guys.

~we accept the love we think we deserve~~

I think T is cringeworthy as a speaker bc she's sooo gd rehearsed. Not a things she says comes across like she didn't practice it in the bathroom mirror 75 times that morning. She would be pretty good if she could lose even half the pretension in her delivery and tossed out the eye rolly words she keeps littering the sentences with like privilege and journey.

they honestly both suck. she’s worse than he is, but they’re both super stiff. and they always do this forced banter bit at the start which just seems so awkward lol

That one anon pointing that some have denied the nose surgery - this is exactly what annoys me about those shipper blogs, not that they are shippers (you can want them two to be together- that by itself doesn't bother me), but their ways and how they always have to insist on vm's perfect image - they all get so upset and aggressive when you point some issue out, like why would you deny Tessa has done a nose job... so out of touch! vm are interesting exactly cause they're real people with flaws

i can not believe ppl r denying her nose job. like yo its right there. it does lend credence to my theory that all shipprs r just hallucinating n seeing things that arent there tho

If Tessa and Scott did hook up while officially with SOs I have a feeling they wouldn't consider it cheating.

ok lmao??? im sure something extremely profound i said provoked this

how rich do u think scott and tessa are???

prob millionaires by the time 2018 comes around if they get their sponsorships

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i might do part 2 later if i can be bothered... but nothing really makes sense out of context lol, its like watching charlie kaufman do slam poetry

[ilovminseok]

Tagged by @chanssoo !! thank u

if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to? uhh honestly not sure lol maybe read some harry potter, watch a few alien documentaries or something and listen to some exo lol have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who? nopee but i dont read often oops list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with. Harry Potter - Luna i guess i would say music fandoms but i mean they dont rlly have characters + there's too many,, do you like your name?  is there another name you think would fit you better? mmm well my name is actually Scarlett and i'd say that fits me quite well? it's reasonably original which i like nd im fond of red thennn hebe is my middle name, again i like it idk if it fits me i guess it does haha? do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing? do you identify yourself by the things you do? what are you religious/spiritual? yea secretly lol do you care about your ethnicity? i mean i'm just british so what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime? oo uh connected to maybeee adele? i was never fully into music until kpop though so exo as well are you an artist? mmmm i mean i do lots of arty things do you have a creed? i had to look up the meaning of creed but no lol describe your ideal day. oo uh like sunny and warm but not too hot and maybe going to a big old house type thing then getting some rlly good food and finding something perfect in a shop idk lol also ice cream dog person or cat person? caT but dogs are great too indoors or outdoors? outdoors are you a musician? i mEan i've played flute and guitar in the past, nd now sometimes i'll do some piano and i take saxophone lessons so yea five most influential books over your lifetime. ,, harry potter? uh honestly i dont even remember the books i've read + im still young lol if you’d grew up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same? mm depends how different the environment was but prob yea would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”? i think it would b if i talked more what’s your patronus? going by the pottermore one a thestral which Harry Potter house would you be in? or are you a muggle? slytherinnn would you rather be in Middle Earth, Narnia, Hogwarts, or somewhere else? oOoO BitCH now that's a question probably Hogwarts, but at one of the other magical schools like Castelbruxo or Mahoutokoro do you love easily? mm idk about love but im attracted easily lmao list the top five things you spend the most time doing, in order. watching weird shit on youtube other social media snapchat/instagram etc homework tumblr bullet journalling possibly how often would you want to see your family every year? i mean i live with my family have you ever felt like you had a “mind-meld” with someone? nopd could you live as a hermit? nah how would you describe your gender/sexuality? female n probably straight but who knows do you feel like your outside appearance is a fair representation of the “real you”? uhh only sometimes on a scale from 1 to 10 (easy to hard), how hard is it for someone to get under your skin? like 9 lol idk depends who tho if i care about them them 0.5 three songs that you connect with right now. u best believe i just shuffled my whole spotify playlist to find 3 songs ok 1. BTS - Not Today 2. Zara Larsson - Ain't My Fault 3. Tatiana Manaois - Helplessly pick one of your favorite quotes. "Flow with whatever may happen and let your mind be free: stay centered by accepting whatever you are doing. This is the ultimate" - Chuang Tzu

tagging: @sehunoh @chokerbyun @chimchimies and @taeboos